#and god everything is just so expensive
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I am 26 years old and ngl guys I've been feeling a lil behind with life rn like im literally just a barista at a coffee shop and its fun and kinda easy (for me, im not working at a large chain, just a local chain) but like idk I kinda want an Adult ™ job with like benefits and weekends off
#is that like impossible?#and god everything is just so expensive#like tbh my ideal salary is like $60k a year I dont want to make fuck loads of money#I just dont wanna worry about life and support myself#idk im kinda debating just going into school again but im like really scared because im smart in the sense that I learn quick and catch on#easily but im not book smart like math and science and shit it confuses and overwhelms me#like I know 26 is young but god I just feel so old and so late to the game#is this my life??? retail and customer service jobs til I die? and its fucking scary because my grandma is like 65 and she's poor and like#she'll never retire she's literally gonna work til she's dead and that's so scary to me man idk#speaking!
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toot toot!
#breaking my streak of dramatic af captions bc look at this. look at it. wtf was i supposed to call it. he's tootin whaddya want from me#he go TOOT TOOT on his lil trumpet i fuckgjn LOVE HIM im maxing this card im serious#lvl 60 10/10 no expense is too much for my precious boy#i found a new brush that has this rly soft charcoal vibe and i used it on this whole thing and it was SEXY it was HEAVEN#it was fun for coloring too!!! and the outfit colors are fun to color OUGHH everything made just for me <3 feeling SILLY#twst#twisted wonderland#twst silver#his bunny outfit sweeps like im sorry but its the best card of the event and its not even fucking close#suntails#i did one 10-pull bc i wanted the paint bonus from epel's card even tho i HATE that card#and i instead got SUPER lucky and got deuce and NO epel!!! i couldnt be fucking happier#then my job interview today never called and i was miserable again but it was an internal issue and im now rescheduled for next week#so please dear god pls guys pray i get this job. i want it sooooo bad
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Confession because it’s Heresy: When I was in elementary school, when everyone was talking about their fictional crushes on the playground I very boldly claimed that Oryx, the Taken King from Destiny would be my husband one day. Since we were all like 8, no one had any idea what I was talking about so when I got home, I printed out a colored picture of him to show everyone at recess the next day.
After all these years, I don’t think there has been any other time where I had been met with so much judgement, fear, disgust, and confusion all at once 😭
#destiny 2#destiny#destiny the game#d2#oryx#oryx the taken king#destiny oryx#my god I was defending my king so intensely by those swings#they just didn’t get it smh#no one in my class had taste#but I was so in love yall omg 😭#i remember a YouTube add for TK came on during class and I screamed at the top of my lungs#anyone claiming to love oryx needs to die by my blade in the pit#im so brave for admitting this#used the expensive colored ink and everything#destiny heresy spoilers#destiny heresy
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Guys you have to start going to brick and mortar stores again instead of buying every little damn thing online. I am so serious
#saying this bc look I don’t like joann’s fabrics as much as the next person#but looking at the chap 11 closures is truly hellish. we only have 3 of these stores in our state and they’re closing two of them#and I can’t help but think about how few options those communities will have to get anything afordable once they’re gone#and I’ve looked it up multiple times for my own purposes: there are so few fabric stores elsewhere in the state. like these go down#and online shopping will be the only option. and especially with something like fabric that can be a huge problem!#sometimes the websites can be reliable enough to tell you thread count and weave and weight but there are soooo many websites that do not#so you could easily get stuck with some fucked fabric and then what!#not to mention on top of shipping shit can get super fucking expensive real quick#and sure joanns is faaaaar from perfect but jesus at least I can go there and scope out the fabric properly#I’m lucky my own local joanns is staying open but holy fuck it’s so bad!!!#like does nobody else see that buying everything online is draining places of local resources and furthering our enslavement to capitalism?#or is it just fucking me????#god DAMN#also this should go without saying that you absolutely should shop local places first too#but like also I get it bc even one of my local places sells their linen for like 40 bucks a yard which is nuts so just. please as long as#you’re not feeding the devil called amazon for god’s sake
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In your professional educated psychology opinion. why is cherik Like That
i cannot give a Professional educated psychological opinion until at least may but as far as i can tell queer people cant be normal bout anything so thats why theyre like that
#snap chats#if i wanted to tbh i prob could do a Genuine Overview of Why Theyre Like That from a character study standpoint#not like the series aint givin me crumbs ...... obligatory 309 mention Do We Get Why Thats My Favorite Issue Now#its literally charles being his own therapist with erik as his mouthpiece. weird ass psychosexual episode like my god#this what i mean when i say queer people cant be normal cause whats that for...#idc if you explained it to me as erik being the embodiment of everything charles hates about himself#see now i wanna reread it but i left the issue at my moms !!!!!! im going back tomorrow for the weekend at least... i can read it then...#im still standing in astoundment...#and when charles said he became obsessive with finding other mutants after meeting erik#oh girl your break up was MESSY messy .... dare i say rebound era ...#charles you cant fill the void like that ......#anyway im gonna be sick now that im thinking of Iconic Cherik Things again i have made myself sick thinking of them#fym your feelings for erik was stronger than falling in love Kill Yourself PLEASE#ok ill stop. ill go now.#ask me this question again like four months idk im not a doctor and i never will be#should i go clinical just so i can pull a lorna and remind everyone of my phd every other day#very funny in theory but too expensive of a joke i fear and while i love a good joke My God.
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I was just mentally writing a tumblr post abt how I need that iphone asap so I can preview a chat when I don't wanna answer (if I archived them I don't get notifications) and then I was like — wait.. I don't have read-reciepts on, they won't know I read their messages 😭😭😭
#driving school teacher texted me and I am doing NAWT ok#especially since this whole test thing his getting closer#drivers licenses are so incredibly expensive in germany guys most people pay 3K on average#and basically everyone fails the first driving test because it's difficult URGHHH#i successfully ignored I'm getting my license for like a month now why is he texting me#can't i just keep avoiding life and everything important#lately struggling a lot with the future again which is NOT great but SO great for my atsumu fic passion#i thought to myself a few weeks ago “i know what I wanna do now it's lowkey hard to channel that existential dread energy for yn”#well and god was like “i gotchu babygirl”#and suddenly my anxiety and fear and sadness is back like never before#and i keep getting content about life milestones or things I need to take care of for thing a and b#thing a; video - drivers license is getting even harder now in 2025 so I should hurry#thing b; video - college/university things and taxes and retirement stuff#like wow thanks for telling me this this is actually REALLY useful but this is also lowkey giving me a panic attack so no I won't like nor#save this video because I don't want this stuff on my fyp#i wanna keep practicing escapism otherwise I might breakdown#ok anyway#so this is really helpful for my fic ! yay !#😆#😶#the voices are speaking
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God, what the fuck do we even do
#looking at places down here and out near Penny and everything is so goddamn expensive#the West Coast is familiar and safe but it's also fucking killing us with loneliness#which to be fair is largely self made#moving away would be such a massive risk though#and like#we do wanna do it#is now the right time?#is waiting for a better time a mistake?#and like.#God#we still have to tell our mom we can't afford movers and we don't have friends here#not looking forward to that#not like she's ever said anything but like#it just makes us feel like a burden you know#idk#we just don't know
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i was considering maybe buying proper fabric this time around to make the Insp.ekta plush but Michaels doesn't sell minky so i guess that's not happening 😭😭😭
#idk any other craft stores.... i am scared to buy from places i haven't done business w before#and i refuse to order off amazon fdsfjkl i only do that when i actually genuinely Need smth that i can't find elsewhere#(or if i have a gift card to use up lol)#i'm also so scared to try to use real fabric ngl fhdsgjkl that feels antithetical to my whole artistic journey and values somehow LMAO#plus if i fuck up ... it's a much more expensive fuck-up than just using felt. that i can usually nee.dlefelt back together.#but also ... i want to make smth i can like... wash and keep clean easier.... OUGHHH#maybe i'll start with a felt version and then make a minky version if it goes well#iron out any kinks in the process w felt... draft the pattern and everything OH GOD I HAVE TO MAKE A PATTERN MYSELF#welp. time to get to work on the pattern i guess LOL it shouldn't be ... tooooo difficult ... (<- the hubris will kill the man)#dandy.cmd
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growing up being denied getting what you ask for for birthdays/christmas because of x & y reasons you get older and you find yourself not able to ask for the things you want 😬
#lex waffles#or really asking for things in general#or is this just a me thing#like even non-expensive stuff i never got#so idk after a while i stopped asking for things and just accepted whatever i got which is fine whatever i'm grateful but still#even if there was things i wanted or needed#meanwhile my brother got everything he ever wanted lmfaoo#but that's not my bitterness coming out or anything#idk my brother never had any shame in asking for things even if they were mega expensive#meanwhile me who hasn't had a new phone for god knows how long & has a battery so bad i need to charge it at least twice a day#is like hmmm i can't ask for a new phone because that's too expensive#birthday saga#this is why i'm so bad at spending money because i learnt early that i needed to save money because i wouldn't be given any#and now i'm just like uh i can't spend it on this thing i need because what if i need that later lmfao#tho i shouldn't feel guilty because it's my dad who will pay for it and that's the least he can do smh
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#this is a trick question because i have decided to do this anyway#but this is more just a warning for everyone#story behind this decision: i lost a lot of work over the years a few months ago#and it will be expensive to pay to get my drive fixed and it may not even result in me getting everything back#so it's time to archive all my potential zine stuff on my accoutn#lmao#thank god i saved the PDF on ko-fi#text post#text post: nb drawls
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do u guys think jack ever let members of the torchwood team fall asleep on him in the backseat. because i do.
#they have a stressful job and they are all sleep deprived look at me. they are passing out on him and he's just staying. so still.#like someone whose cat is on their lap.#how this ends differs for everyone because if its like gwen she's going to wake up probably and not even be fazed by her doing it#but like owen wakes up. makes a face. 'why does everything smell like jack- oh god' and then flails to get off of jack.#jack ignoring his flailing with an arm draped heavily over him until owen gives up and decides if theyre doing this he's getting as comfy a#he can at jack's expense.#wait i have more for the other two#light sleeper toshiko i know this in my heart. she's constantly waking up slightly and adjusting herself and falling back asleep.#jack helping by petting her hair or rubbing the back of her neck.#ianto can and will fall asleep face completely smushed into the side of jack's neck.#okay. okay. im done. im done.#torchwood
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apparently this is what I do in my spare time
#yans stuff#old man polycule#all my houses on pc kinda suck I just needed some refs for art purposes#zerith is soooo talll#i'm laughing at that 3rd one tho#azandar: tampering with arcane knowledge in the kitchen#zerith: looks into the camera like he's on the office#one of the things i wanna do when i get enough gold is build the seaside cottage azandar talked about in one of my ficlets#i know exactly where I wanna build it too#but god everything on pc is so fucking expensive#like easily double or more what it is on xbox idgi
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just lost my entire analysis that I spent 3 hours on somehow even though I distinctly made a point of saving it several times to my drafts.
all that’s there are my initial jot notes after my computer crashed every time I tried to add any images.
#maybe I just. shouldn’t make analyses lol.#maybe the universe is trying to tell me to shut the fuck up ghajxocfjnf#anyways. this and a whole host of other issues means I probably need a new computer soon. joy.#I’ve been looking and everything is so expensive oh my god.#storyrambles#random thoughts
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nothing like waking up to a mouthful of saliva on the verge of throwing up
#tf did i do to you body?#is it stress? fear??#I've had this feeling of nausea ever since that day I received the news#and ik for sure I haven't ate anything bad#god my stomach is killing me#i know you shouldn't resist it and that it's better to just listen to your body and throw up#but I hate throwing up and I hate the dreadful anticipation#okay back#had to pause making this post snd run to the bathroom#the deed is done and I feel so much better despite the horrific experience of throwing up thrice in a row at the same minute#now I'm brushing my teeth#this has been one of the worst ways I've woken up#but hey. at least now that I'm back to semi functional. Here is a fun fact about throwing up#that liquid you feel collecting in your mouth before you hurl? it's not stomach acid (despite me saying so) it's actually good for you#protective solution to coat your teeth mouth and throat so the actual stomach acid doesn't burn or damage you#but i don't remember if it's saliva or something else lemme look it up#okay yeah it is saliva. it would've been crazy if it was stomach wall lining. that shit is expensive to make#expensive bodywise. Repairing it takes a lot of time—i would know#recalling everything I ate yesterday and judging by the emptied content of my stomach—it was the watermelon and strawberry juice's fault#But I drank some before and yesterday#It's the fucking stress isn't it#Even when I fool myself into thinking I'm happy. My goddamn body will betray me and manifest my fear#I really don't know what to do at this point
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love realizing i have dysphoria from something i THOUGHT i fixed a year ago that’s so fucking cool
#i’m so fucking frustrated. this was expensive and it only SLIGHTLY solved the problem#listen to your gut if a surgeon isnt 100% what you want go to a different fucking surgeon. ugh#i’m so angry i’ve been wondering for MONTHS why i still had so much dysmorphia tuuurns out it’s. dysphoria!!1 cool!!!!!!!#i’m also angry that i know if i say anything there’s a good chance ppl will be like ‘this is why plastic surgery is bad’#god. it solved some things for sure mt surgeon just didn’t do everything i thought he was going to#i don’t even regret the procedure i just wish i went with a different person#don’t get surgery in SAV if you can help it the healthcare down there is horrible#nick.txt#vent#i know it’s dysphoria because if i see myself from a diff angle we’re totally fine#it’s just. straight on. ugh. UGH!!!!!
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Hello my loves💜
Just wanted to keep y’all updated as I’m in the process of preparing to move across the country! Things are quite hectic right now, but I am writing and just wanted to let y’all know. I was thinking of doing a lil one shot if you guys are interested. If that’s something that may be of interest of you let me know💜
Until I post again please have this picture of a man I saw skiing on the side of the road the other day as this is the vibes I want to have:
#just a little update#god of war ragnarok#i am kind not complacent#one shot suggestions?#I hate moving#everything is so expensive girlie#heimdall x reader
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