#and for anyone who's actually mad at one driver or another...it's literally a 1 point difference

[toffee-and-tandoori]

looks like there was a bit of team drama at alpine at the end of the race. and they were getting along so well at the bee event! i mean did you see that sign??? hopefully things didn't get too ugly...oh

[outerbankies]

You know how teenager rafe is gonna just be spiralling over reader going to prom with someone else? I’m going to cry cause like he’s a baby and he doesn’t know why he has these feeling for this one person that he’s always kind of orbited around?? And he knows she’s it for him but only deep down cause he’s trying to figure so much out and how could you know who you’re going to end up with at the age of 17 let alone 10 or 12 but he’s always known and aaaaah imagine that kind of love

an angsty little pre-series prom blurb partially inspired by this ^ ask that made me spiralll. thanks anon i hope u like this!

—

new light blurb: before we knew — rafe cameron

new light series masterlist

obv takes place pre-series in high school! referenced in part 1

warnings: underage drinking

“Top, it’s not fucking funny.”

“It’s kinda fucking funny, Y/n/n. Like, way more than a little.”

Rafe had ditched the last fifteen minutes of statistics when he finished his test early today, and he’d been messing around on his phone for ten minutes waiting for the rest of you to come and get in Topper’s Jeep so you could all go to lunch off-campus today.

Rafe stands up straight from where he’d been leaning against the hood when he hears your voice approaching, his smile matching yours once you see him. “Hey, Rafe. How did your stats test go?”

“Good, hey, Y/n. What’s not funny?” he asks, opening the passenger side door for you before sliding into the backseat behind you.

“Oh, get this, Rafe,” Topper says, laughing. You just groan again, clicking your seatbelt on. “Griffin is gonna ask Y/n to prom. Tomorrow.”

Rafe blanches. “Griffin?”

He knew Griffin thought you were hot. Certainly had to hear it enough times in the pool at practice every day. Rafe always found himself biting back a remark—well, almost always. As captain, Rafe was able to tell everyone to run another play whenever he felt like it. The extra exertion in the pool was nothing compared to having to tread water and hear his teammate talk about you like that.

But even after all of that, he still had no idea Griffin had the balls to actually make a move on you. Because Rafe could tell you’d seriously rather die than ever give Griffin the time of day. And Griffin had been pursuing you without luck for months, even though you’d been trying to gently show you weren’t interested. Half of the time, Rafe wished you'd just tell him to fuck off.

The other half of the time, Rafe was considering just doing it for you.

Rafe clears his throat after his outburst, a finger digging into a hole in his jeans. “How do you know?”

“He just told me in PE,” Topper says. “He said he has this huge banner, and speakers, and he’s gonna do it at lunch right in the middle of the quad—”

“Topper.” You cut him off a bit more seriously this time; Rafe can hear the shift in your tone. You've always hated being anywhere close to the center of attention, getting embarrassed by the smallest things others wouldn’t even think about. If Griffin actually knew anything about you the way Rafe does, he’d know you wouldn’t like something big and flashy. “Can you stop?”

“Hey, cut it out, Top,” Rafe is saying immediately. Topper just rolls his eyes, but Rafe doesn’t care. “You okay?”

“Yeah, Rafe,” you say, smiling over your shoulder at him. “M’fine.”

“Do you want me to tell Griffin to—”

Topper laughs from the driver’s seat, clearing his throat to cover it up when you look over at him. You look back at Rafe, and his heart breaks at the worry in your face. “Don’t, Rafe.”

“Are you gonna say yes?”

“No,” you immediately laugh, looking at him like the idea is preposterous.

“Oh c’mon, Y/n/n. Can’t say no to him in front of all those people,” Topper teases. “And where the fuck is Kelce? I’m starving.”

“You’re right,” you sigh. “I don’t wanna embarrass him. I’ll just find him after school today and tell him I’m going with Kelce.”

Topper’s eyes widen, Rafe catches it in the rearview mirror before he hurriedly looks away. Rafe clears his throat, settling back into his seat from where he’d been leaning into the front space to talk with you. “You—uh, are you actually going with Kelce?”

“Yeah,” you nod, distracted by your phone. “We said we’d go together if we didn’t find dates. Kelce didn’t really wanna ask anyone after what happened last summer. And after nearly being set up with Top last night, I’m about ready to throw in the towel.“

Rafe looks to his friend that sits in the driver’s seat, who's looking straight at his lap, the back of his neck bright red. “Wait, you two?”

“It was just our parents, dude. Went to dinner at the club last night and our moms brought it up,” Topper mumbles. You giggle at the idea, completely unaware of the energy in the car right now.

“Yeah, sorry, Thornton. But no thanks. You and Emily should be really cute, though,” you say earnestly, patting his shoulder.

Topper just stares straight ahead. “Thanks, Y/n/n.”

“And then this thing with Griffin—I’m just so over the idea of finding an actual date at this point,” you sigh. “Plus, I know Kelce won’t put up a fight about the color scheme. I’m thinking like, aqua. Or maybe pink? I don't think I'd look good in gold.”

You'll look good in absolutely anything, and Rafe will just have to watch you from across the floor of the Island Club, while Kelce twirls you around the dance floor or holds you close during a slow dance.

The guy in question opens the car door and slides into the backseat next to Rafe right then, sighing as he slides his backpack off. “Sorry guys, coach stopped me in the hall. Where are we eating?”

Rafe glares at him.

“I want a smoothie,” you declare from the front seat.

“Fine with me,” Topper nods, pulling out of his parking spot. “Guys?”

“Can we go to that place with the deli next door? I’m so hungry,” Kelce says.

“Yeah, I like their açaí bowls,” you say, twisting around to look at Rafe one more time. He must not be able to hide his emotions as much as he thought, because your smile drops when you see him. “Rafe? Does that sound good?”

He turns his body to look out the window, eyes flicking back to yours one last time. “Not hungry.”

—

Rafe meets Topper and Kelce at the dock later that night, the three of them intending to get drunk and maybe take Topper’s boat out if they felt like it.

Kelce is already there by the time Rafe pulls up, drinking a beer with Topper while they laugh at something on his phone.

And Rafe paces right down the dock, snatches Kelce’s phone out of his hand, and pushes him off the platform and into the water.

“Rafe, dude,” Topper says, immediately pushing him back by his chest.

“What the fuck?” Kelce sputters, spitting out water as he surfaces and climbs the ladder back up. “What is your fucking problem?”

“You couldn’t ask literally fucking anyone else? It had to be Y/n?” Rafe says, laughing indignantly. He looks down at where Topper is still keeping them separated. “And you—what the fuck—”

“I told you, man. It was just our moms. We didn’t even consider it,” Topper says, rolling his eyes.

“You both lied to me,” Rafe accuses. “Because you knew I’d be mad.”

“And why’s that, Rafe?” Kelce spits, reaching around Topper to try and push at his chest. “Why are you mad? Not like you were gonna ask her.”

“No,” Rafe says immediately. And he isn’t even lying; it’d never crossed his mind as a possibility. Which is why he can’t even begin to try and work out why he’s this upset about it. He didn’t do anything to stop this, but it’s still happening, and it’s making him crazy. “You know my dad’s making me take Reagan since we’re both on prom court.”

“That’s what I thought,” Kelce grumbles. “I was gonna tell you.”

“When?”

“Soon, I just—we made the plan so long ago, bro. Neither of us wanted to worry about dates… but I gave it time because I thought you might—I dunno,” Kelce trails off, shrugging. “I dunno.”

“Thought I might what?”

“Figure your shit out and ask her yourself,” Topper says, coming back from the boathouse with a towel that he passes to Kelce.

“Even if I could, Y/n/n would never say yes to me,” Rafe scoffs, shaking his head and reaching for the six-pack they were working through.

Topper scoffs back. “Oh, yeah ri—”

“Guess we’ll never know,” Kelce says, cutting him off while he dumps the water out of his shoes. He sighs at his soaked clothes before he looks back up at Rafe. “You know I’m not into her right? We’re just going as friends. It’s senior prom.”

“Why would I care what you’re going as?” Rafe says, shifting in discomfort, hand clutching his already-half-empty beer can a little tighter. “None of it even matters.”

“Whatever you wanna tell yourself, bro,” Kelce sighs, grabbing his phone out of Rafe’s hand and pushing past him to go change.

—

“Nice taste, Y/l/n.”

You whirl around from where you’d been adjusting Kelce’s boutonnière (you’d only pricked him twice, which was a personal record for you) at the sound of Rafe’s voice, plastering on a smile before you face him. Your eyes drop to his attire immediately. “Oh shit, Rafe. We match.”

“I know,” he laughs. “My step-mom wants a picture.”

You furrow your eyebrows, shifting in your heels, the tule of your dress suddenly itchy against your legs. “Um. Shouldn’t you take one with Reagan?”

“We already took a million. From every angle. With every possible fucking pose,” Rafe sighs. “C’mon, please? Before the limo comes.”

Rafe grabs your hand and you look back at Kelce who just nods, downing some champagne. “Take care of my date, Cameron.”

You can see Rafe just shake his head where you trail behind him, leading you back to where Rose is talking to one of the other moms. “There you are. Your dress is beautiful! I wish we'd found one like that for Reagan. It looks great with Rafe's tuxedo.”

“Uh, yeah. It's nice to see you, Mrs. Cameron,” you say politely, ignoring the last half of what she said completely. She pulls up her phone and Rafe’s bringing you into his side, his hand resting in the middle of your back.

“This okay?” he murmurs, his breath fanning over your neck as he leans down.

“Yep,” you say quickly, but you can’t help but look around and catch multiple of your friends watching you, including Reagan, who promptly rolls her eyes once you make eye contact with her.

“Y/n, sweetie, just a few pictures for the newsletter,” Rose says, reminding you of your purpose right now.

“Right, sorry,” you say.

“Hey,” Rafe whispers. You look up at him, feeling his hand bring you closer to his body. “Take this a little more seriously, Y/l/n. Don’t you know that the next issue of the Island Club newsletter will be completely ruined without this one specific photo, that will probably be squished into the corner of a terribly- edited collage?”

You laugh in surprise, hitting him on his chest for joking about his step-mom right in front of her. “Rafe. Be nice.”

He just grins down at you, before straightening up and turning back to the camera. “If I’m nice, will you save a dance for me later tonight?”

You’re glad he’s not looking at you anymore, because then he’d see the way your smile faltered before you turn back to the camera as well. “Sure.”

—

“How is my flask empty?” Kelce groans, tipping it over and shaking it out for emphasis.

“That’s what happens when you drink it all, bud,” you laugh, patting his shoulder. He rolls his eyes at you, linking his arm in yours as you both pass through the crowd to find Topper and his date, Emily. You all watch Rafe up on stage, waiting to inevitably be crowned prom king.

He was a shoo-in anyway, but you’d definitely distracted your English teacher with a conversation about the 1984 essay you just turned in while Topper and Kelce stuffed the ballot box he was meant to be guarding.

Rafe seemed like he couldn’t care less about stuff like prom court, just shaking his head when his name was announced over the speaker as a nominee three weeks ago at lunch.

And he’d dragged his feet through finding a date, just shrugging whenever you brought it up to him, prying partially for your own sake.

You couldn’t figure out why he seemed so averse to the entire event, but you supposed that was better than having to hear him go on and on about Reagan and how he asked her and what corsage he bought for her and if he was bringing her to after-prom—or anything else that would’ve dragged up some feelings you thought you’d firmly buried at this point, telling yourself for years that you never stood a chance with Rafe.

But the closer graduation got, the more you’ve been realizing that things with your friends would never be the same. Things with Rafe would never be the same.

“Kildare Academy, your prom king is Rafe Cameron,” the DJ says, snapping you out of your thoughts. Kelce and Topper cheer obnoxiously while you laugh, a little grateful they’re both drunk and distracted—so happy their plan worked (Rafe subtly flips them off behind his back as he’s crowned) that they can’t notice the way your shoulders slump as Rafe leads Reagan, just crowned queen, out to the middle of the dance floor while some Ed Sheeran song starts playing through the speakers. You’d roll your eyes at the terrible music selection if that was what you could focus on.

All you could focus on was wondering if Rafe would even remember that you promised him a dance tonight.

Kelce is dramatically bringing you into his arms as the prom court dance takes place, subtly turning you around so your back faces the stage and the court, smiling as he holds your waist. “C’mon, dance with me.”

—

Rafe’s letting go of Reagan as soon as the song ends and everybody cheers, dashing off to the DJ booth after telling her he’d be back in a bit. She merely shrugged before adjusting her crown and going off to some friends.

“Hey man, can I pull some prom king privilege right now?” he says, leaning in to speak into the guys’ ear. “I have a song request.”

“Playlist is set, approved by the school,” he says dismissively.

“Thought you might say that,” Rafe grumbles, reaching into his breast pocket before he can take the time to wonder if he’s really going to do this—if he’s really going to bribe the DJ to play a song by your favorite band before he goes to cash in on that dance together that you’d promised.

He hands him a crisp hundred.

The DJ sighs, snatching it out of his hand and pocketing it while Rafe smirks in victory. “Alright, what song, country club?”

And then it's practically a race to find you before the Kid Cudi remix currently playing ends. Rafe heads off in the direction where Topper and Kelce had been yelling when he was on stage, evening his pace when he spots you jumping around with Kelce, your dress fanning around you while you laugh, the string lights illuminating your face.

You’re smiling so big that it stops Rafe in his tracks.

Guys had always shown interest in you, and you turned most of them down. Not all of them; Rafe still had to see you with guys who absolutely did not deserve you giving them the time of day, sometimes at parties or maybe at the Club. Rafe could usually lie to himself, write off these feelings as some protectiveness over you, a nice girl who’d been a good friend to him his entire life. Rafe was protective of all the people he held close in his life, why wouldn’t he look out for you, too?

But something must have changed, because now—now Rafe’s looking at you, and he knows time is running out before you both set off on your futures. He has three weeks of school left with you, then a summer of seeing you around. And then... that's it.

And now he’s looking at you, those feelings less and less ignorable with every single second closer Rafe gets to not having you around him every day anymore.

Those feelings are crowding every corner of his mind, finally coming to the surface after all of the drama with prom dates had forced Rafe to wonder why he couldn’t stand you going with Griffin or Topper or Kelce. Couldn’t stand thinking about you ever being with someone that wasn’t him—a reality he knows he’d have to get used to you a lot quicker than it took him to even realize he’d fallen for you.

Because the future’s coming, and maybe in the future you actually end up with someone like Griffin, or Mateo, or that guy from the party that one time, or that touron from New England that your parents tried to set you up with, some hotshot you brought home from California after a semester, or Kelce—even Topper. Your parents would love that one. And one day in this future, you’re running into Rafe on the soccer field; your kids play for the same team together. Rafe ended up settling for someone he could never like half as much as he loved you, and he sees you across the field with a sweater tied around your shoulders, chatting with all of the other moms. The lucky asshole you finally chose just watches you the way Rafe always had, the way he is now as you dance with his best friend, the way Rafe will probably never be able to stop himself from doing.

Or maybe there's another future without you, where you move away to somewhere that suits you; the Outer Banks had never good enough for you, in his mind. Maybe you stay in California after school. And you bring home that hotshot that’s perfectly matched for you, who gets to hold you and kiss you and have you. Rafe only gets to see you every once in a while, when you decide to grace the Outer Banks with your presence for the holidays or for Midsummers. Maybe in this scenario, Rafe was never able to find someone else, maybe he shows up solo while you flash your engagement ring when the old crew gets together for drinks—no, you wouldn’t do that. You’d be absolutely smitten with whoever won your heart, showing the ring he got you to your girl friends with an embarrassed little smile pulling at your lips while they all gush over it. And maybe one of your friends jokes about how Rafe used to have a crush on you. You'll just laugh and shrug it off, nodding—because you knew all along. Of course you knew, everyone had to know at this point. And Rafe can picture you merely laughing at his feelings for you as the other guy gets to pull you closer on his lap.

The opening chords of your song snap him out of his reverie. He can see the exact moment you realize what song it is.

Rafe beelines for you, holding his hand out as soon as he’s in your vicinity, fully pretending he hadn’t just realized he’s fallen for one of his closest friends in the middle of prom. Like he hadn't realized that he wasn't just into you, didn't just think you were cute or like the way you made him feel when you remembered his stats tests or wore his shirt to his water polo games. Like he hadn't just realized that no matter how many times he'd told himself it didn't bother him that much that you'd never come close to giving him the time of day, that he'd never forget what it felt like to not even be on your radar.

“You promised me a dance, Y/n.”

You look at him and his outstretched hand and smile, then look back to Kelce, who's quickly letting you out of his arms, casting an accusatory glance at Rafe. But then he smiles a little. “I'm gonna hit the restrooms.”

“Too bad our one dance is gonna be to a song by a band you hate,” you laugh, accepting Rafe's hand. Rafe’s on autopilot, his hands resting on your lower back while yours move to his chest, swaying the two of you in little circles. The song is already through with the first verse.

“I don’t hate this band,” he lies. But maybe it’s not a lie—how could he hate anything you loved?

“Okay, prom king,” you laugh, fiddling with his pocket square a little, the one that matches your dress. “Still can’t believe we ended up matching.”

“Great minds, Y/l/n,” he shrugs, eyes trained on your face. Your hands slip up around his shoulders, and you nudge the plastic crown on his head before leaving your arms to rest there, fingers locked behind his neck. Rafe pulls you closer. The second chorus was already starting up. Time was running out.

“I’m not sure what the optics are of our matching and you leaving the prom queen to come dance with your friend,” you say, your small smile turning into a frown. “Reagan already seemed pissed earlier.”

“Don’t worry about her,” Rafe says. “It’s just you and me right now.”

“When we go off to college, I think I might just miss you, Cameron,” you say, smiling.

And Rafe might not ever get to tell you how he feels, or ever be with you the way he wants to, but at least he got to dance with you at his senior prom.

“I know I'm gonna miss you.”

—

@moniamaybank @downbytheouterbanks @littlementalpolaroids @fangirlvoice @chicagoblackhawkslover96 @pogueslandia @loveylangdon @oopsiedoopsie23 @sodasback @rafeseggplant @cooper8224 @rafeyybabyy @lemur46 @cameronsrafe @theepoguelandia @judayyyw @irlpadfoot @synonymforlame @tinawhynot @mildkleptomaniac @ilymarkchan @sofiatheseconf @hockeyshmockey @supersouthy @coffeeandcrimeshows @emptyloverofmine @infinitleyethereal @nerdypartytrashpsychic @mrs-cameron @tcmhollnd @nicavass @sakikos @catonthesideoftheroad @jemimah-b99 @serrendipiity @depressinq @svechnibrock @julianakawaja @ctrlcherries @lostaurorax @wildflower98 @babygirl2022 @lieswithoutfairytales @painlesslies @messagesinthesky @orrsoared @destourtereaux @sammywilscn @tylernagle @anonymousobxfan @lilacsandwhiskey @raphaelcameron @mardema @princesspogue @alwaysclassyeagle @brittlehe-art @drewswrld

[baroquebucky]

buc-ees

a/n: hey guys ! I’m working on like two other timmy fics and two bucky ones rn and i just got this idea and it was too cute to not share ! this is for all my fellow Texans and for anyone who loves road trip fluff (pls excuse any typos is 1 am hehe

in which you culture timothée with the greatness that is buc-ees / overall road trip fluff

“mon amour i don’t see why we have to stop at the gas station, we have enough for well past it” timmy turned to look at you, speeding down the interstate highway. “sweetheart, oh my innocent little angel” you began, a small smile on your face as the sunset besides the two of you. “You don’t understand, if you see a buc-ees, you have to stop, i don’t make the rules” you shrugged your shoulders, getting comfortable in the passenger seat once again.

Your boyfriend sighed before looking at you again, “you don’t really want me to pull the puppy eyes out do you?” You threatened him and he groaned, knowing that as soon as you pulled the puppy eyes out, he would be so needy for your attention for hours on end, attention he couldn’t give you since it was his turn to drive. “Fine we’ll stop, i don’t get what the hype is about this dumb beaver” he sighed and you punched his arm, causing him to let out an “OW” and look at you very offended. “What the hell was that for!” He furrowed his brows at you before breaking into a smile as he saw how serious your face was. “don’t you ever disrespect buc-ee like that again” you huffed, crossing your arms over your chest and looking out the window.

“You’re stuck in this car with me for at least 10 more hours so you can’t get mad at me” he stated and a smile broke onto your face, you undid your seatbelt quickly and planted a kiss on his cheek, causing him to smile and quickly turn his head and press a kiss to your lips. “Watch the road Chalamet! We have to get there alive you know” you teased and he rolled his eyes, turning up the volume of your music.

Timmy got excited everytime he spotted a cow, always pointing and shouting “oh my god cows! look y/n there’s cows over there!” with the biggest smile on his face and you of course encouraged him, pointing out the babies when they were close enough to see. When he saw a bunch of them close to the road he literally pulled over and took a bunch of pictures of them, taking selfies with them too.

You of course were quick to post his antics on your story so that he could never deny doing such a thing. city boys huh you had captioned it, causing all of his fans to melt at his actions. The two of you were quickly back on the road, your favorite gas stop only a couple miles away. “trust me pretty boy, you will not regret this” you smiled at him as he pulled into the already packed gas station. His eyes went wide as he saw the amount of cats there, “im not gonna lie to you darling i thought you were exaggerating but i guess not” he spoke, laughing softly as he drove around trying to find a parking spot.

Once you finally found a good spot, he hopped out, rushing to open your door and you gave him a quick kiss on the lips. “You ready for the best experience of your life?” You smiled, squeezing his hand as the two of you walked in. “I can think of something much better right now” he whispered in your ear and you laughed, softly hitting his arm before shaking your head. “Trust me, it’s not.”

The doors slid open and you saw timmys mouth fall open a bit, stunned at how big the store actually was inside. Within seconds he grabbed your hand and was pulling you along, looking at all the things the store offered. “We have to get matching shirts! Let’s get this one, wait no this one, fuck it let’s get both” he smiled at you, a glint in his eyes as he grew giddy looking at all the things available in the store. Before you could even say anything, the curly headed boy had wandered off into another section, looking at the well of polished semi-precious rocks.

“can we pick out a bag for each other? Then we can always have a rock with each other and you won’t miss me when I’m gone!” He spoke quickly, pulling you to his side as you laughed at his behavior. “Kay angel hand me a bag” you replied to him, he quickly gave you a small brown bag and the two of you began sifting through the rocks.

“this one kinda is the color of your eyes” you held up the rock next to his face and he smiled, eyes crinkling as you plopped it into the bag. “This one is the color of those flowers i always buy you!” he exclaimed, quickly showing you before you nodded quickly and he put it in the bag. After thirty minutes of looking through rocks and comparing them to random things you finally moved onto the famous food items the store had.

“let’s get dippin dots!” You smiled at your boyfriend, “whatever you want mon amour” he smiled back, intertwining your fingers as the two of you waiting in line, it was a funny sight. Timmy held a bunch of shirts, two for him, two for you, and so many more for his friends and family back in New York, he held the two little bags of rocks in another hand along with a small keychain of the beaver hanging off his pinky. You quickly ordered two large cups of the delicious balled ice cream and Timmy swiped some burgers and beef jerky on your way to the counter.

The two of you practically skipped out with all the things you bought, he was almost vibrating with happiness as he gushed about how amazing the store was. You helped him open the car door and smiled at your boyfriend. His hair was messy and in his face, his wild curls matching your many baby hairs. His eyes were bright and his whole figure seemed to radiate happiness.

The two of you got into the car and began to dig into the food he had gotten, taking a bite from one of the burgers he bought, moaning as he chewed before the two of you traded so he could try the one you chose. “You were right, so much better” he smiled. “Told you so” you replied, taking a napkin and wiping some sauce off his cheek.

The two of you finished the burgers and quickly ate the dippin dots, laughing as you told him stories of your childhood and he told you funny stories of when he was filming or anything else that had happened to him. As you both finished the ice cream you remembered the beaver statue at the front of the store.

“angel i forgot to tell you, there’s a statue of buc-ee at the front of the store” you spoke, not expecting much of a reaction from him. He turned to you quickly, opening the car door and rushing to your side, pulling you out and quickly locking the car before dragging you behind him towards the statue. “Slow down!” You laughed as the boy rushed to the beaver, beaming at you when he stood next to it.

“He’s so cute! Oh my god I love him” he spoke, looking at the beaver and then at you. Quickly he handed you his phone and posed with the beaver, he quickly asked some stranger if she could take one of the two of you. “oh no timothée i look so bad right now” you protested but to no avail, he pulled you next to him and stood next to the beaver, placing you on the opposite side of the statue. He quickly thanked the lady and swiped through all the photos. The two of you dying of laughter during half of them because he wouldn’t stop making jokes. Of course he set one of them as his lockscreen, a soft smile on his face as he stared at how beautiful you looked mid-laugh.

“okay it’s already so late we should go before we get more off schedule” you started, grabbing your boyfriends hand and pulling him to the car. “You know it’s your fault” he began, falling into step next to you, “had you not told me of this heaven on earth we would’ve been far ahead” you rolled your eyes and smirked at the boy.

“would you have ever forgave me if i never told you of it?” You questioned and he thought for a second, opening the car door for you. He stood there for a minute before shaking his head and leaning down to give you a quick kiss before rushing over to the drivers side.

“you always make things so much better ma cherie” he spoke softly, smiling at you. Even in the dark of your car, only illuminated by the many lights of the parking lot you could see the love in his eyes.

“I love you so much Chalamet” you whispered, slowly leaning over the center console. “I love you so much much more y/l/l” he whispered before crashing his lips onto yours. The two of you pulled away with a smile, quickly getting back on the road and saying goodbye to timothées now favorite part of the lone star state.

[datleggy]

I realize we are in the middle of a pandemic and possibly the worst thing to ever happen collectively to humanity, and that you're probably feeling as emotionally drained as I am... But I've reread your Buck Volunteer AU like 16 times in the past 3 months. It makes me happy. I realize writing might not make you happy right now, or give you energy or be on your mind. But reading is keeping me sane. So thank you for that little universe. I'll be here when you feel up to adding to it. ♡♡

these last few months have been pretty awful at every turn and have kinda made it almost impossible to write the way i’m used to (writing is like my lil escape from reality most of the time tbh) and this message made me really happy, i really appreciate this, so thanku. <3

and also, here are two lil random additions i’ve been v sporadically working on for the volunteer buck au?

and ima go ahead and tag the ppl i promised to tag(i hope i got everyone!)? i hope ya’ll don’t mind they’re unfinished snippets?

tag list: @ironbuckley @chrrlees @disgruntled-pelicant @nighting-gale17 @daughter-of-infinity @romeoandjulietyouwish @badbitchjackson @chitownwolf @lamalefix @moira3000 @heather-likes2review @demonwithasideoffries @pan-buck @fyeahhipsterdoctor @daylightisviolent @themoonyloveenvy @randomlyordinarlyed @jillibob44

SNIPPET 1.

Buck sneezes into his elbow, groaning miserably as he throws another load of laundry into the washing machine. He's been grappling with a cold for the past couple of days, and though as someone who works almost none stop, Buck should be relieved to finally have a few sick days off from work, the reality of it is, he's going a little stir crazy at home all by himself.

His studio apartment's never been as thoroughly clean as it is now, though, so Buck isn't too mad about the undesignated time off.

One minute Buck is putting his last quarter into the machine and the next he's lying sideways on the floor and there's a ringing in his ears and smoke filling up the laundromat, people screaming and scattering and dazed. Buck sits up carefully, confused until he sees the giant truck that smashed straight in through the giant glass windows.

He manages to stand up, ignoring the way the room starts to spin, and takes assessment of the situation, something he's learned to do while volunteering for the 118. It's a Wednesday afternoon so thankfully there weren't too many people inside doing laundry today, but those who were are all down, though some more out of shock than actual physical injury.

"Call 9-1-1!" Buck tells the laundromat employee, who's standing behind the counter, unharmed but horrified at the sudden destruction, and she nods hastily, getting out her cell. There aren't too many badly injured people, and those that are able, are helping those who aren't, so Buck limps over to the vehicle to check on the driver. He's a male in his thirties most likely, and by the empty beer cans on the bed of the truck it's obvious the driver's intoxicated.

He's passed out at the wheel, blood smearing his face from a laceration at the top of his forehead, but his pulse is strong and steady and nothing appears to be broken, upon Buck's initial examination.

There's a wailing to his left so, having confirmed the man will live to see his day in trial, Buck rushes to help. There's a woman on her knees, sobbing, with a little boy in her arms--he can't be older than Christopher. "Ma'am," Buck gets down next to her so that they're at eye level.

The woman clings to her child, shaking her head adamantly.

"I'm a doctor, I just want to check to see if your son's ok. Please." Buck exhales, relieved, when his words reassure the mother and she hesitantly lets go. He's breathing, but it's labored and from the sounds of it and all the fresh bruising on the boys' sternum, most likely he's got a collapsed lung. Buck looks to the employee who's still on the phone with 9-1-1 and asks for an ETA on an ambulance.

"The operator says two minutes!"

Buck curses faintly. He doesn't know if the kid has that long. As if to prove his theory, the boy stops breathing altogether, his skin turning a terrifying hue of blue. His mother's screaming now, completely inconsolable and a hushed crowd is starting to form outside of the laundromat.

The paramedics hop out of their rig but until firefighters get to the scene there's just no way they can get in without risking injury to themselves, since the car is blocking their way and has started to smoke fumes.

"Everybody please remain calm. The fire department's only five minutes out." they assure everyone. Weber and Jones; Buck knows them from working at the hospital and waves to get their attention. "Doc?!" Weber exclaims, when she spots him among the injured.

"This kid's got a tension pneumothorax, he's not gonna last five minutes without medical intervention. I need one of you to pass me a 16 gauge bore needle through the opening there so I can do a decompression!"

"You got it!"

The boys mother is close to hyperventilating at this point.

------------------------------------------

SNIPPET 2.

It's been a tough week--though that might be an understatement--and a part of Buck wants to stay wrapped up in a pile of one too many quilts and blankets, in the dark, watching bad romcoms and never leave his apartment ever again. But he's been so busy at work Buck hasn't had a single moment to text anyone from the 118, and he thinks maybe being around them might make him feel a little less like the world has come to an abrupt halt. He also hasn’t eaten anything besides instant ramen in over a week, and that can’t be good.

They’re in the middle of a card game when Buck shows up and Eddie begs him to join in. "It's way too easy taking Chim's money." he sighs. "I need a challenge."

Chimney gawks at him. "Big words from the man who was literally whining like a baby not five minutes ago. He was all, 'Oh I hope Buck comes in today. Buck didn't answer any of my texts this week. Do you think he's ok? Should I call him? Would that be too much?'" he pokes fun, only stopping when Hen flicks the back of his ear.

“Play nice.” she says. She sits down in the chair next to Buck and nudges his shoulder playfully. “Eddie wasn’t the only one worried, by the way. You suck at texting but I usually get at least a ‘K’ back--long week?”

Buck leans forward in his seat, elbows perched up on the table. “Yeah. Something like that.”

Bobby, who’s in the kitchen making breakfast for everyone, overhears the ongoing conversation and tilts his head in concern. The kid sounds wrecked.

“Sometimes it helps to talk about it.” Hen prods gently.

Buck chews on his bottom lip, nervous. He didn’t come here to unload his problems on his friends.

“You can talk to us.” Eddie says, reaching across the table to give his hand a quick squeeze. “You listen to my problems all the time--hell, I called you last week on your lunch break to yell about some asshole who cut me off in traffic.”

That manages to get a small smile out of Buck. “Ok, ok, I--” he takes a deep breath before starting. “I messed up.” he scrubs a hand over his face. Why hadn’t he seen it?

[kasienda]

Restorative Justice - Chapter 1 Community Circle

Summary: Chloé has never been a fan of Ms. Bustier’s community building activities. In fact, she detests them. She doesn’t want to learn about the drab boring lives of her peers. And she absolutely can’t stand it when their confessions make her feel things. Feelings that she doesn’t even have names for. But when Adrien unknowingly shares his struggles with his double life, Chloé vows she will do anything to get Ladybug set things right. Even if it means pissing off the heroine. Chloé was already mad at her anyway. Chapter 1 - Community Circle

The morning could not have gone better for Chloé Bourgeois. She had a new outfit that flaunted her form and matched her bee themed jewelry perfectly. The house staff had been incredibly complimentary of her assemble, the chef had made her favorite breakfast, and Sabrina had greeted her with her favorite coffee upon her arrival, which she had enough time to savor because her driver had hit all the green lights on the way to school. Then she walked into the classroom and every muscle in her body went rigid. The normal rows of desks had been disassembled and reorganized into a circle of chairs around a decorative centerpiece cluttered in silly and cute knick knacks laid in an artistic spiral on a colorful throw blanket. Chloé almost turned around and bolted immediately. “Good morning, Chloé! Sabrina!” Ms. Bustier greeted, her voice warm and welcoming. “Feel free to take a seat anywhere in the circle.” The blonde sighed. It was too late. She had already been spotted. Her shoulders fell and she stomped over to a seat. “Isn’t it great, Chloé?” Sabrina gushed enthusiastically as she took the seat to Chloé’s right. “We don’t have to do work today!” “Fantastic,” Chloé grumbled bitterly, inspecting her own nails in an attempt to distract herself. Sabrina was technically correct. They didn’t have to do any academic work whenever Ms. Bustier organized a community circle, but Chloé hated community circles. She would have preferred the academic work, honestly. Not that she could really articulate why she hated them. She just did.

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“Oooh!” Mylene squealed from the doorway. “A community circle! These are my favorite days!” Chloé glanced at the clock already counting down the minutes until the end of the period even though it hadn’t started yet. The whole class filed in gradually. Marinette chose a seat on the exact opposite side of the circle, and Alya, Nino, and finally Adrien filled in the seats around her when they arrived. Marinette handed out croissants to her friends, which the other three accepted with delighted grins. Chloé’s eyes remained on Adrien, wondering for the millionth time how he had made friends so easily. She had always assumed he would struggle when he came to public school, and that meant he would have to hang out with her. Chloé had been beyond excited, but things hadn’t gone the way she predicted. And now, he felt further away than ever. Adrien didn’t need Chloé anymore. And sometimes, with the way he stiffened when she grabbed his arm or frowned when she was critiquing someone’s fashion choices, she wondered if he even liked her anymore. Had he ever liked her at all? When the bell rang, Ms. Bustier held up the usual set of six norms and guidelines for appropriate behavior during a community circle. Chloé didn’t bother to read them. “Please remind the people on either side of you what each of these norms means,” her teacher directed. Sabrina turned towards her, but Chloé turned stubbornly to the right, towards Max who was conveniently turned towards Nathaniel who sat on his other side, so Chloé wouldn’t have to talk to anyone. Sabrina was quick to take the hint, and joined Rose’s and Juleka’s conversation instead. Chloé glanced at the numbered list. Speak your truth. It was the third item of Ms. Bustier’s Guidelines and Norms. Chloé scoffed and turned back to her nails with disdain. As if any of these plebians could understand her truth! “Are there any questions about what any of these mean?” Ms. Bustier asked, and glanced around the circle. No one said anything. Chloé rolled her eyes. This was the fifth time the class had gone through one of these. They all knew how they worked. “Does anyone feel something needs to be added in order for you to feel safe sharing?” And again, Ms. Bustier waited, but no one responded. “Alright. Then I would ask everyone to give a thumbs up if you agree to uphold these norms.” There was a slight rustling as everyone moved at the same time to give the hand signal. “Ivan, do you agree to these norms?” The teacher prompted. Ivan lifted his thumb up higher in response. “Chloé?” Chloé sighed before she gave a half-hearted thumbs up. She had learned the hard way that if she didn’t agree, she would just get locked into a conversation about what she felt she needed to be safe within the group. And it’s not like she could say she didn’t like it when other people shared personal things. She didn’t know why she didn’t like it. She just knew hearing the details of their drab boring lives made her… uncomfortable. No, uncomfortable was too mild a word. Chloé literally felt like she couldn’t breathe at times. And in those moments, she wanted nothing more than to clamp her hands over her ears, and flee. At least Ms. Bustier never forced Chloé to share if she didn’t want to. That was the only reason she hadn’t thrown a fit with administration about these community circles. Having gathered consensus from everyone, her teacher had started the circle by reading a poem. Ms. Bustier referred to these as mood pieces. Today’s poem was something about looking past the surface or something. Honestly, Chloé didn’t really know. She wasn’t listening. “We’ll start with a check in question. What has been a rose and thorn of your month? Is there anyone who would like to go first?” Alix raised her hand.

Ms. Bustier smiled warmly and gestured an open hand toward the centerpiece. “Please select a talking piece.” Alix darted from her seat and considered the arrangement of knick knacks at the center of the room, and chose a little stuffed bear before returning to her seat. “My rose would be that I’ve won three out of four bets against Kim,” she announced with a smirk, drawing an amused chuckle from the class, before passing the bear to Mylene on her right. Mylene spoke so quietly that Chloé couldn’t hear what she was saying, not that she was actually trying to listen. In fact, it would be better for everyone if she didn’t hear any of it. When the soft brown stuffed bear came to her, Chloé passed it to Sabrina without a word. Chloé always passed. “My thorn would be that I lost three out of four bets with Alix,” Kim drawled out, earning another laugh from the class. Chloé sighed and glanced up at the clock again. Forty-two minutes remained. “My rose would be that I got to go on a date with Ondine. She’s divine,” Kim continued. “Hardly,” Chloé mumbled under her breath. “Chloé, would you take a step outside for a moment?” Ms. Bustier asked calmly. Chloé stomped outside the classroom, but honestly, when the door closed after her exit, her body loosened in relief to have escaped the awkward circle. It was far better to sit outside with her legs dangling over the edge of the balcony and the paved courtyard below. Out here, it was quiet. She didn’t have to listen to anyone else babble on about their mundane achievements and struggles. Unfortunately, her teacher joined her not three minutes later and the teenager scrambled to her feet. “Chloé, do you know why I asked you to step outside?” Chloé nodded, her fingers fiddling with her belt. “The comment I made after Kim shared his rose.” Ms. Bustier nodded. “And do you think your comment upheld the norm of speaking with respect?” Chloé gritted her teeth. “No,” she admitted, her gaze lost over the railing. “What about listening with respect?” Chloé glanced up at her disapproving teacher, and looked back down into her hands. Bustier was the one teacher she wanted to think well of her. Ms. Bustier was the only teacher that seemed to care about her at all. “No…” “You agreed to uphold these norms, did you not?” Chloé bristled. It wasn’t like she had much of a choice. “I did,” she bit out. “Chloé,” her teacher said more softly. “I know these activities are not your favorite days.” Startled blue eyes flew up into the gentle face of her teacher. “You do?!” Ms Bustier coughed, with a closed fist covering her mouth. Her green eyes sparkled with amusement, and Chloé suspected her teacher was trying not to laugh. “You make it very clear. But I want you to know I think you could get a lot out of them if you actually let yourself engage in them. You might learn something about yourself.” Chloé turned away again. She didn’t want to learn more about herself. What if she didn’t like what she found? “I cannot force you of course. You don’t have to share if you don’t want to, but I do need you to uphold these norms during the activity. Do you understand?” Chloé nodded. “I understand.” The red-headed teacher poked her head back into the classroom. “Kim, can you join us for a moment?” A few seconds later, the broad shouldered jock with his stupid haircut came through the door and stood just a pace away. "Kim, Chloé’s comment was directed at you. What do you need in order to feel okay with her coming back in?" He turned his gaze towards her, and he grinned. There was nothing friendly about the expression. He was planning something. Don't you dare! She mouthed at him. If he said he wanted an apology she was going to get sent to the principal's office and threaten to call her father. Damocles was way easier to intimidate than Bustier. And Chloé would not apologize. “It's fine, Ms. Bustier,” Kim said easily, his smile never fading. “We are all used to Chloé at this point. She can come back in.” At first Chloé was surprised, but then she realized the dumb jock knew exactly what he was doing. He was making her come back to the fucking circle. Bastard! Their teacher indicated they should head back inside the room with an open arm. Chloé went first, her hands clenched into fists, Kim followed behind, with Bustier in the rear. Chloé slid into her seat quickly and continued to try and ignore everyone around her. Ms. Bustier cleared her throat loudly to gain everyone’s attention. “Alright class, for our activity today you will need a piece of paper and a marker. There are several colors for both paper and pens for you to choose from at the center of the circle. After you have your materials, you are going to trace your hand onto the paper.” Chloé scoffed. Trace their hand? What was this? Kindergarten? “Outside of your hand, write the things people see or assume about you. On the fingers, write down what you wish they saw instead. On the palm, write down what you hide from the world. Directions are on the board if you need a reminder. Go ahead and begin.” Chloé didn’t move when the class scurried into action towards the centerpiece, which stored the materials for the activity, but Sabrina brought her back a piece of yellow paper, and a black marker. Chloé smirked. At least Sabrina brought her the right colors. Chloé took an inordinate amount of time tracing her hand. Sabrina and Max had already filled in the outside of their papers, and had started working on filling in the fingers when Chloé finished tracing her hand. On the outside of her drawn hand, she wrote ‘Queen’, ‘Stylish’, and ‘Powerful’. It was only three words. A glance to her left and right showed that Sabrina and Max had written half a dozen more adjectives or features on the outer section of their papers. Chloé didn’t care. She didn’t need more words to define her. And she definitely didn’t bother filling in the fingers. She didn’t care how people saw her. And even if she did, she wasn’t going to admit that to anyone, let alone write it down on a piece of paper for all her peers to see. So instead, she tapped her marker on her table without any pattern or rhythm glancing at the clock every few seconds. Twenty nine minutes to go. She suppressed a groan. Could time go any slower? “Alright!” Ms Bustier called. “Raise your hand if you need more time.” Chloé flipped over her page to hide that it was incomplete. When no one raised their hand, Ms. Bustier continued. “We’re going to count off in order to randomize our discussion groups. After we’ve done that, please find the other two people in the room that have the same number as you.” Chloé was assigned a three, which put her in the same group as Mylene and Alix. But as luck would have it, Sabrina ended up with Ivan and Adrien. It took all of five seconds to convince Ivan that he could be with Mylene if he just swapped numbers with her. No one said anything about her manipulation of the random assignments, and Ms. Bustier was circling around on the other side of the room, so Chloé doubted that the teacher would notice before they were all deep in discussion. Sabrina jumped right in, holding up her purple piece of paper with her hand traced neatly in green with a dozen words written out on various parts of the page. Her friend pointed to the outside of the traced hand first. “People often say that I’m bubbly, helpful, a good listener, and people often remark on my red hair. I’ve also been told that I’m useless and I’m a fashion disaster,” Sabrina explained excitedly. Chloé did not react outwardly to Sabrina’s words even as her gut twisted uneasily. The blonde girl glanced down at her nails. It had really been too long since the Chloé had bought Sabrina a gift. Her friend might like a new handbag or an organizer for all her headbands. Sabrina definitely deserved to be spoiled on occasion. “But really,” Sabrina continued her eyebrows rising into her forehead with excitement. “I wish people would see that I’m intelligent and that I work hard.”

“You’re also very loyal,” Adrien interjected with a soft patient smile. “You give unconditional support to your friends. That’s something I really admire about you, Sabrina.” Chloé’s eyes jumped to his face. How could he just say all that so easily? Really, it wasn’t fair. Sabrina’s cheeks turned pink, and her hands clutched either side of her face in embarrassment. “Why thank you for saying so, Adrien!” Chloé sighed. Really, she shouldn’t have been surprised when Adrien made friends so easily. He was naive and socially awkward, definitely. But… well, he was also always so… earnest. Even with her. “Chloé?” Sabrina called softly. Chloé’s gaze jumped up to both of her partners staring at her expectantly. “What?” she demanded impatiently. Neither Sabrina nor Adrien flinched at her tone. She loved them for that. “Did you want to go next?” Adrien clarified, pointing at the folded paper in her left hand. Chloé glanced down at the folded paper. “Ah, no. That’s okay!” she exclaimed, giving Adrien a bright smile. “Why don’t you go first, Adri-kins?” He nodded. “Sure Chloé. Whatever you want.” He opened his green paper to his hand traced in black. Chloé rolled her eyes at the Chat Noir color scheme. He had even drawn a little cat emoji on one of the fingers. Not very subtle, Adri-kins. Sure, Chloé dressed up in Queen Bee colors all the time, but Chloé had never bothered trying to keep her identity a secret. Adrien was so obvious sometimes though. She didn’t understand how no one had figured him out yet. “People say that I’m attractive, rich, and incredibly fortunate. Apparently, I’m quite the catch.” His tone was light, but Chloé knew better. He hated that people saw him that way. Hated that he was objectified and pursued by those that had never met him. “I wish people realized that I’m just a regular kid.” See, that, Chloé did not understand at all. She had no desire to be normal. She was far above normal. And so was Adrien. “And I wish people knew that I was funny,” he continued. Chloé burst out laughing. “What?” he demanded, his voice sullen and petulant. She just shook her head. “You might try to be funny, Adri-kins. You don’t often succeed.” He pouted. It was adorable. “I just made you laugh, didn’t I?” “Keep telling yourself that,” she commented dryly. But she smiled at him just the same. He smiled back. “As for hiding from the world?” he continued, an arm behind his neck. “I would have to say loneliness.” Chloé’s smile evaporated. “I feel like even when I make a connection with someone, I have to hide half of who I am. No one seems to even want to see all of it,” he confided. Chloé’s gut twisted painfully. She had always assumed that he had abandoned her when he had come to school and made new friends. But she never really let him be himself either. She had mocked his corny jokes and self conscious habits. And she had done nothing but scorn Chat Noir before she realized who he was. Her arms crossed over her stomach, squeezing her own form tightly. God, Chloé hated community circles! Why couldn’t they be writing an essay right now or something? She didn’t want to feel this way! Or feel anything at all, if she got to choose! “Chloé?” Sabrina’s concerned voice cut into her thoughts. “Are you okay?” Chloé made herself smile. “Of course! Why wouldn’t I be anything other than stellar?” she bit out. Adrien arched a golden eyebrow at her tone, but didn’t comment. “It’s your turn,” he told her instead, once again gesturing to her yellow paper. She bit her lip. She really didn’t want to share it. There wasn’t anything to share. “Raise your hand if your group needs more time,” Bustier’s voice rang out throughout the room. Sabrina and Adrien both started to move, but she shook her head emphatically at them, and their hands dropped back to their sides. “Alright then, if you would please return to your seats for the closing.” The class burst into movement again. “It was nice chatting with you both,” Adrien said with his usual patient smile. Chloé nodded in acknowledgement. “You too, Adrien!” Sabrina gushed. Chloé turned to go back to her seat only to bump shoulders with Marinette. Chloé sneered at the other girl, feeling even more animosity towards her long time school rival than usual. Adrien said that he had never been able to share all of himself with anyone. That included Ladybug. Marinette’s blue eyes narrowed into an icy glare of her own. “Don’t think I don’t know that you cheated to be in Adrien’s group!” she hissed. It was more to be with Sabrina. Adrien was just a bonus, but there was no way she was going to explain that to Marinette. “You’re only upset because you didn’t think of it first,” Chloé bit back. “Alix, Kim, Marinette, Juleka, Chloé! Would you please rejoin us in the circle?” Chloé turned on her heels without a glance at the others, and settled back into her seat, her arms folded across her chest. There was only nine minutes left of class! One more question, and Chloé would be free. It couldn’t come soon enough. Ms Bustier smiled warmly at the whole class from her own seat within the circle. “I want to thank you all for participating today and for being brave enough to be vulnerable with each other today. I have one final closing question for you all before you depart. What is something you’ve been struggling with this month? Take twenty seconds to think about it,” she directed and allowed the room to fall into silence. Chloé slid her yellow flats against the leg of her chair absently. She didn’t bother thinking of a response to the question as she wasn’t going to share. It was a terrible question anyway. “Is there anyone who would like to go first?” Ms. Bustier’s resonant voice called out. Chloé cursed under her breath when Max, still at her right, raised his hand to go first. At the teacher’s direction, he moved to the center of the room, and selected an item - a replica of Ladybug’s yoyo, before returning to his seat. “I’ve been struggling with a bug in Markov’s code. I can’t sleep because I can’t stop thinking of potential solutions, but so far nothing has worked.” He handed the talking piece to her. Chloé practically threw the cheap plastic toy at Sabrina as if it was a piece of hot coal that would burn her. Chloé was not about to share her struggles. She would not give anyone in this room the satisfaction or a weapon to use against her. “Our geometry homework has been really long and complicated,” Sabrina shared. Several of their classmates nodded in agreement. Chloé’s shoulders relaxed, releasing tension she hadn’t realized was there. If they were all just going to whine about hard math problems, Chloé could handle it. “I’ve been struggling to identify my sexual identity.” Chloé’s gaze jerked up at the vulnerable pronouncement. Alix didn’t even blush as she passed the yoyo to Kim. The jock fiddled with the toy for a second, not speaking. Just flipping it over and over again in his hands. “I…” he swallowed and started again. “My mother is sick,” he confessed. “And I’m not sure she’s going to get better.” And it was all too much. Chloé’s skin crawled like a colony of ants had taken up residence. She rubbed frantically at her arms, losing the battle to sit still. This was why Chloé hated circles. She tried not to listen as the spotted talking piece was passed around the room. It went through Rose, Juleka, Ivan, Mylene, and Nathaniel. Chloé was able to tune it all out. “I’ve been feeling… overwhelmed,” Marinette admitted even as she spun the yoyo in her hands. “I have so many responsibilities, and I’m terrified that I won’t be able to live up to them all on my own. And I’m scared it will be someone else that pays the price.” The silence roared in Chloé’s ears. How she wanted to dismiss Marinette’s fears as being an over dramatic teenager. But she couldn’t. Chloé knew exactly what Marinette was talking about. On god damn it all, Chloé actually felt bad for her. For the weight on her shoulders. She didn’t want to feel this way! Certainly, not about Marinette Dupain-Cheng. And definitely not about Ladybug. Chloé was still angry with Ladybug. Marinette passed the red and black yoyo to Adrien who took it with a smile before turning back to the circle. He also stared at the talking piece for a second before sharing. “So many people in my life claim to care about me. But then,” he trailed off and glanced up to the ceiling then back down to the centerpiece in the center of the floor. “But I don’t think they actually respect or trust me. They just expect blind obedience. And I… I don’t know if I can do that forever.” And Chloé had no trouble hearing him. None at all even though he was clear across the room, even though he spoke barely louder than a whisper. It was like a prayer. One that not even Ladybug could recognize. So it was up to Chloé. She would have to fix this herself. Somehow.

[zoequeenz]

Extreme Aggressor (Part 1)

A/N: Hi, so here is my Criminal Minds rewrite that I started a few years ago. I only have the first three episodes written and uploaded on my Wattpad and Quotev and I thought it would be interesting to try Tumblr out. Hopefully y’all enjoy!

MASTERLIST

Seattle, Washington

034321

Z4SALE: I’ll send you a picture of the car…

Z4SALE: New Paint. New tires. Not bad, huh?

HEATHER: Why so low on the price?

Z4SALE: Moving. Must sell ASAP. You up for a test drive?

Heather though nervous really needs that car. She quickly grabs her red umbrella and goes to the meetup spot. The red Datsun Z pulls up and honks twice to get her attention. She smiles impressed. The man gets out of the car to introduce himself. Due to the pouring rain the man has his hood over his head.

“Hey.”the seller says.

“Wow!” Heather says with clear amazement in her voice.

The man runs over to shake hands with Heather.

“Hey, I’m Heather.” She states.

“Nice to meet ya.” The man remarks.

Heather runs to the driver’s seat while the seller gets in the passenger’s spot. Once they are both in the car Heather takes off.

“It’s a 2.4 liter, 6-cylinder engine.” The seller notes in a flat tone.

“With Hitachi side-draft carbs.” Heather mentions while smiling.

“That’s right. Wanna take a look under the hood?” The man chuckles.

“Yeah!” Heather declares.

They pull over and get out to look under the hood.

“You know your Z’s. I’m impressed.” The man congratulated closing the hood of the car.

“You should have your mechanic check it out anyway.” He continues.

“Okay.” Heather says in a small voice.

“How ‘bout I leave you my number and we can set it up?” The driver tells Heather.

“Thank you.” Heather replies as he opens the door to the car so he can drive her back to her office.

As she gets in the driver removes the inside door lock and Heather is locked in the car. She points signalizing the way to go.

“So it’s just...right up here.” Heather pointing to the right.

The driver doesn’t stop.

“Oh! That was..”Heather chuckles.

“Hello! There was the right.” Heather attempts to explain.

But the man continues to drive down the street.

“Uh, maybe just...pull over here, and we can try a U-turn.” Heather says in a nervous voice  trying to make the man to drop her off at the meet up spot.

As the man continues to drive and ignore Heather she starts to get distressed.

“What are you doing?” Heather questions becoming more and more uncomfortable.

The man continues to drive and ignore Heather. Heather is starting to become even more scared.

“Okay. Stop the car. Pull over now!” Heather demands in a firm voice.

The man continues to drive. Heather looks out her window then looks down and notices that the inner door lock is gone and that it is lock. She turns to look at the man with fear in her eyes. The driver hits her in the face knocking her out and continues down the road.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

Aaron Hotchner’s POV

Washington, DC

“How ‘bout Andrew? It’s Greek for ‘valiant’.” Haley suggested.

Haley and I are trying to pick out a name for our new baby. We know it is a boy, the only problem is we can’t agree on a name.

“Let’s call him..Sergio.” I suggest with a smile on my face.

“Please tell me you’re kidding.” Haley chuckles.

“Butch?” I throw out.

“How about Donald?” She asks.

“Hans.” I say quickly.

“No! Wait, wait. Um...okay. Gideon.” She states.

“Not a chance.” I say walking over to her.

“It’s Hebrew. Look what it means. It’s perfect. Gideon Hotchner. Haley says trying to persuade me.

“No.” I say raising my eyebrows.

“Yes.” she repiles.

“No.” I tell her moving closer.

“Yes.” she declared.

“No.” I murmured kissing my wife.

“Gideon.” She ended.

My phone rings. Both Haley and I already knowing what that meant we kiss and hug just as I get a fax. When I get the paper it says missing person with the picture of Heather Woodland.

Derek Morgan’s POV

(At the bar with three women at a table.)

“It’s the 1940s. He put bombs in train stations and movie theaters.” I question the three women.

“Uh, the “Mad Bomber,” George Metesky.” The woman in the blue shirt said.

“Nice. The winners sit. Losers, drink.” I exclaimed in an impressed tone.

“Hold on. Metesky wasn’t a serial killer. None of his bombs ever killed anyone.” The woman in the red dress adds.

“Well, you think all we do is serial killers? Trust me, we cover the whole spectrum of psychos. We profiled the “DC Sniper,” the “Unbomber.” We do terrorists, arsonists-” I explain before I get cut off.

“Supervisory agents trying to get trainees drunk?” The woman in the red dress questions while nodding.

Then my cell rings. It’s from the BAU. The woman in the striped shirt looks over my shoulder at my phone.

“Wow. Behavioral Analysis Unit. You work with Gideon? Were you with him in Boston?” She woman asked me.

I look back and answer “ I was supposed to be.” I turn back around to answer “Yeah this is Morgan.”

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

Jason Gideon’s POV

(A Projection of various of victims)

“Anyone recognize these faces?” I ask the class I am teaching.

“Victims of the “Footpath Killer.” I female student answers.

“That’s what Virginia newspapers are calling him. We refer to him as the UNknown SUBject or Unsub.” I tell the class. As agents we don’t like to give the Unsub a name it just doesn’t seem right.

The lights come back on in the classroom. I keep on explaining how we figured it out as pictures of the victims flashed on the screen behind me.

“I told Virginia PD we’re looking for a white male in his 20s… who owns an American-made truck in disrepair. Works a menial job. I told ‘em you find him… don’t be surprised to hear him speak with a severe stutter.”

“Not to sound skeptical, but come on… a stutter?” She questions.

“Where’d the murders occur? Hiking paths. Isolated. If I’m a killer who has to use an immediate application of overpowering force, even out in the middle of nowhere, I lack confidence. I can’t charm them into my car like Ted Bundy did. I can’t because I am ashamed of something.” I tell the class trying to get them to understand how I came to this conclusion.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

Persephone Chase’s POV

I’m sat at my desk filling out some paperwork when my best friend Spencer Reid comes up to my desk.

“Spencer I have told you this a thousand times, you can’t keep showing me physics magic Hotch already warned you once.” I tell him before looking up.

“Actually Persephone we have a case.”he tells me.

I look up and notice a two files in his hands. He hands one to me and I look it over. It talks about the disappearance of a woman named Heather Woodland.

“Hurry we have to go get Gideon.”he tells me as he waits for me to get up.

“No, you need to get Gideon you just don’t want to go alone.” I state.

“ I hate that you can read me like that.”he laughs.

As we walk down he gives me more information on the case. Once we get to the classroom Reid opens the door and taps the file with his hand to gets Gideon’s attention.

“Excuse me.”Gideon dismisses himself from the class and comes with us to be briefed.

“They’re calling him the “Seattle Strangler.” Spencer informs.

“Four victims in four months.” I add in.

“He keeps ‘em alive seven days.” Spencer continues.

“The handle serves as a crank.” I finish.

“Allowing him to control the rate of suffocation.” Gideon tells us.

“To prolong it?” Spencer asks.

“To enjoy it. Seattle’s hit a wall.” States Gideon.

“He gets pleasure out of suffocation?” I ask out loud.

“I would assume so Chase.” Gideon answers.

“Physical evidence is nonexistent. There are no tangible leads.”Spencer says just as we arrive at an office.

“And another girl missing.” Gideon says grabbing the photo from Spencer.

“I looked the case file over. I’ll get some thoughts to you ASAP.” Gideon tells us as he stand behind a desk.

“You’re gonna be with us in Seattle ASAP.” Hotch says entering the room with Morgan right behind him.

“Hey Little One. How have you been?” Derek asks me.

“I’ve been good, lots of paperwork it’s like I never leave the office.” I tell him while pulling him into a hug. He then turns around to show Gideon a picture of the victim Heather Woodland.

“22-year-old Heather Woodland.” He says handing Gideon the picture and taking a step back.

“Before she left for lunch, she downloaded an email with a time-delayed virus attached. The killer’s virus wiped her hard drive and left this on the screen.” Hotch informs us handing the message to Gideon.

They look at each other for a while before Gideon walks over to the wall and begins to read “For heaven’s sake, catch me before I kill more. I cannot control myself.” When he looks up we all look over at a picture on the wall. It says the same thing and under it, it reads “ William Heirens, Lipstick Killer, 1945.”

“He never keeps them for more than seven days, which means we have fewer than 36 hours to find her.” Hotch points out.

“They want you back out in the field. Are you ready?” I ask him remembering why he took a six month leave in the first place.

“Looks like medical leave’s over, boss.” Spencer adds.

“They sure they want me?” Gideon questions.

“The order came from the director.” Smirked Hotch.

“Well, we’d better get started.” Gideon says blankly.

As we drive to the airport I get in a car with Spencer and Gideon. It is silent for most of the ride which makes me uncomfortable because is seems too quiet. Spencer looks back at me and notices my discomfort.

“Hey Persephone, do you think it’s weird that we don’t have nicknames for each other.”Spencer asks me.

“Why would you ask me that?” I ask him.

“Well don’t best-friends give each other nicknames?” he asks me.

“If you want nicknames then we’ll have nicknames.” I declare smiling.

Spencer turns around smiling. He has told me of his high school days and they were bad. I wish I could’ve been there to be his friend but sadly I lived in Indiana. A small town but a good place to grow up because it was small and everyone knew each other.

We get to the airport runway in front of the jet and jump out to meet Hotch and Morgan. We walk towards the plane and get ready to go to Seattle.

“Joseph Conrad said, “The belief in a supernatural source of evil is not necessary. Men alone are quite capable of every wickedness.”

Hotch and a female agent exit the other car and head to the plane with us.

“This girl may only have 36 hours to live. We’re not asking for a judgement of Gideon. We want an assessment. We want to know you’re there to step in if he can’t perform. Are we clear?” she asks Hotch.

“Of course.” Hotch states.

He then joins us on the plane. Hotch comes to sit with me and Spencer. As we take off I look around. There weren’t many girls on the team which kinda sucked. No one to talk to about girl stuff. Our team has always been like this, well I have Garcia but she doesn’t come to the field with us she is a technical analyst for the team. After we’ve been up in the air for a few minutes Spencer begins to read the profile from beside me.

“His first victim was 26-year-old Melissa Kirsh. Stab wounds, strangulation.” Spencer told us.

“Wait,wait. Back up, back up. He stabbed her...and then strangled her to finish her off?””

“Why would he stab her then strangle her? The stabbing itself should’ve killed her if he left her there.” I state.

“Other way around. Why do you think he started using the belt with the second murder?” Gideon asks.

“Strangulation with your bare hands is not as easy as one would believe. He tried, probably found that it took too long…” Spencer tells us.

“So he stabbed her instead.” Derek finished for Spencer.

“And realized it would be hours cleaning up blood.” Hotch adds in.

“Next time, our boy’s got a method-- the belt.” Derek shares.

“He’s learning, perfecting his scenario. Becoming a better killer.” Gideon finishes.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

Heather Woodland’s POV (Victim)

Where am I? Why is it so dark in here. There is tape over my mouth and eyes so I can’t see or speak but I can tell I’m in a wire cage when I feel around. I’m able to move my hands because the man who took me didn’t tie me up. I touch the tape on my face. All of a sudden I hear a voice that makes me gasp.

“What did I tell you about the tape?” here  asks in a mincing voice.

He is getting closer to the cage I can hear his footsteps. He smacks the cage and I scream. I can’t see or speak in this state I am very vulnerable. He reaches down and unlocks the lock but leaves the chain where it is.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” I sob.

He then removes the chain. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” I sob again through the gag.

The door squeaks. “I’m sorry.” I sob waving my hands in front hopping it would provide me some protection from my kidnapper.

He grabs my wrist pulling me towards him with struggle due to the fact that I’m trying my best to stay in the back of the cage. He gets out nail clippers and begins to clip my nails. He continues to cut while I cry out.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

Persephone Chase’s POV

We have finally landed and are currently driving to the FBI headquarters here in Seattle. I’m sitting next to Spencer when he turns to me and asks me a question.

“Have you thought of a nickname yet?” Spencer asks me.

“I have not, I am having so much trouble with it.” I tell him.

“Take as long as you need.” he repiles.

“Why do you want nicknames?” I ask.

“Well….”Spencer starts out but we pull up to the building and he rushes out of the car.

Odd, Spencer is never this nervous around me. He is an awkward person but ever since we started working together he became more comfortable with me. He grabbed what he needed and started to walk. I quickly got out and grabbed the last of what was needed and followed the team in. We have to put our bags through metal detectors as Gideon picks his up Derek nudges Spencer and I.

“He never stands with his back to a window. When I was between him and a doorway, he asked me to move.” Derek told us.

“So.” I said not understanding what he was applying.

“That’s hyper vigilance. It’s not uncommon in post-traumatic stress disorder.” Spencer tells us while Hotch catches up with us.

“Just how much disorder are we talking about?” Derek asks.

“Morgan, it’s been six months. Everything’s okay.” Hotch tells us calming me down more.

To be completely honest I’ve been worried about how this new case would affect Gideon. He has a soft spot for the team I know it and most importantly me and Spencer, but more for Spencer. He is a very good guy and I don’t want what happened to him six months ago affect his work. I know he needs time but you’d think six months would be enough. We walk to the bull pin a.k.a the place where all the agent’s desk are. Hotch introduces us.

“This is Special Agent Gideon, Special Agent Morgan, our expert on obsessional crimes, Special Agent Chase, and Special Agent Reid.” Hotch tells the agents of Seattle.

“Doctor Reid.” Gideon clarifies for Hotch.

“Dr. Reid, our expert on, well, everything, and after two years of busting my butt in this office, I hope you remember me.” Hotch jokes making everyone in the office chuckle, believe it or not he does have a sense of humor.

Gideon looks at the boards they set up then says.

“He’s willing to travel with the body.”

“Then he drives a vehicle capable of concealing one.” Hotch adds.

“One in 7.4 drivers in Seattle owns an SUV.” Spencer tells us. “Explorer with tinted windows.” Derek adds.

“Windows that keep whatever is hidden in your car away from public view.” I say.

“Explorers rate higher with women.” Spencer recalls.

This entire time Gideon has been glued to the board with the pictures of the victims. He looks at each board with each victim.

“But how do we know it’s his car?” Derek asks.

“Ted Bundy drove a VW Bug.” answering his rhetorical question.

“What about a Jeep Cherokee?” Hotch questions.

“Jeeps are more masculine.” Spencer tells him.

“We all know how an Unsub feels about asserting his masculinity.” Gideon says turning to face us.

“When did the Bureau become involved in the case?” Hotch asks.

“ After the fourth body. He dumped that one out of state.” an agent tells us.

“On purpose.” Hotch tells Gideon.

“If so, knowledge of law enforcement does suggest a criminal record.” Spencer says.

“Not always, it could just mean he knows the cops are catching on and he is trying to get them off his trail.” I say.

“Or that he watches television. May I?” Derek as extending his hand out to take a file.

“So you wanna see our suspect list?” asks another agent.

“No, we won’t look at a suspect list until after we come up with a profile. It keeps our perspective unbiased.” Hotch tells him.

“When do we sit down your task force?” asks Gideon.

“Four o’clock.” the agent responds.

FOUR..four. How are we supposed to create a profile before four. I haven’t done much field work in a while in rusty.

“An accurate profile by four o’clock today?” Derek questions thinking the same thing as me.

“That’s not a problem.” Gideon says.

Gideon walks towards the board and we all follow. I’m a bit nervous I know that I can do it, it’s just that I am a bit rusty. Like I mentioned before I have been doing desk work for a while, the field is a stranger to me at the moment. I guess Spencer noticed my discomfort and took a hold of my hand. I looked up at him and smiled. He always knew how to make me smile.

“Agent Gideon, where would you like to start?” Hotch asks him as he walks up to the board with victim number two Anne Cushing and he points at a photo and says.

“Let’s start at the site of the last murder.”

NEXT CHAPTER 

[shorties-unite]

I Might Even be a Rockstar (HannahMontana!AU)

Part 1/?

Summary: Roman is a normal boy with a very normal life who also happens to be a teen pop sensation. Virgil is a normal boy who also happens to have a debilitating crush on a teen pop sensation. Stuff happens I guess 

“THANK YOU GUYS FOR COMING, YA’LL HAVE BEEN A GREAT AUDIENCE. GOOD NIGHT EVERYBODY!!” Princey gave an enthusiastic wave as the pyrotechnics let off there final sparks and confetti erupted from the cannons. Red and gold flecks of glitter raining down into the front section of the screaming crowd. He placed the microphone back in it’s place on the diamontie studded mic stand, before turning and exhaling. He loved this post show high. As he wondered his back to his dressing room he always felt lighter than air and his mind prickled comfortably with static. Someone from the crew handed him a towel and He smiled gratefully and tapped the sweat from his brow as he opened the door to his dressing room, promptly being engulfed into a hug. “You were amazing out there Ro!!” He relaxed after a moment into their arms and laughed softly. “Thanks Patton, that’s really sweet but these contacts are stinging my eyes so can you please let go?”. Patton laughed. “Fair enough,” he replied, as he moved away, allowing Roman to reach the makeup table on the other side of the dressing room, digging though the box of makeup and accessories searching for his contact case. Once found, he opened the container, and placed it on the table, already digging one of the nuisance lenses out of his eye. He glanced up into the mirror surrounded by flashbulbs. The reflection staring back at him had straight, fire engine red hair, perfectly styled into a quiff that took a lung damaging amount of hairspray to maintain. Gold glitter surrounded his eyes in a why which seemed haphazard but was in fact a very particular and intricate type of simple-yet-extravagant glam. Behind the glitter peered two eyes, one a piercing shade or emerald green and one muddy brown. Inconspicuous, boring, basic. Nothing special in the slightest. Swiftly, he removed the second contact, sweeping up their container and placing it neatly back inside the makeup case, which Patton had begun to carefully pack away, handing Roman a pair of oversized, red embezzled sunglasses from the depths of the case, which he promptly slipped over his face as someone knocked at the door. “Come in!” he called, trying to muster up as much pep as he could when in all honesty his eyes were burning, his head was itchy and he may as well have been asleep on his feet. Adieu, post stage high! Until next time. “It’s just us darlin, great show tonight,” came the reply as the door was pushed open to reveal a man with long red hair and a thick moustache along with another, younger man who would look strikingly similar to Princey himself, had most of his face not been obscured from view by tinted sunglasses and a large cap with the words SECURITY printed in bold lettering across the from. “You about ready to go?”. Princey nodded and crossed the room to meet them, adjusting the lopsided cyan wig on Patton’s head on the way. “We’re ready, let’s get this magic trick over with,”. 

*Oooooh yeahhh* 

Logan LaMottie let out a frustrated sigh, pointed glare focused directly on his best friend. “Virgil, we have school tomorrow morning and the chances of you seeing him, is completely infinitesimal, much less anything actually of interest”. Virgil rolled his eyes, but didn’t quite manage to wipe the small smile or the slight flush off of his face. “Are you still mad about that Lo?” he responded with a mischievous smirk, earning another sound of annoyance from his companion. He peaked at his reflection in the surface of the chrome pole that segregated the crowd away from the scarlet carpet leading to the black limousine with windows so tinted it seemed almost impossible that even the driver would be able to see through them. “Look,” Logan began again, shuffling closer to his friend in an effort to stop the girl next to him from standing on his foot. “Crowds aren’t my scene, and the really aren’t yours either, can we just go? You can just look up photos of him on the ride home or stare at your bedroom wall for a couple hours or something. You already know what he looks like after all”. Virgil turned to look at him for the first time since they’d arrived outside the stadium, literally hours ago. There was something in his eyes that Logan couldn’t quite place. He raised a hand, combing it through his hair before sighing for what must have been a record breaking third time in 45 seconds. This time in defeat. “Fine,” he replied. They could stay for his best friend to fulfil his dream of catching a glimpse of this Princey that he was oh so obsessed with. In the grand scheme of things, Virgil wasn’t one to ask much of him, so he supposed he could give a little just this once. Even if the level of infatuation his friend felt for the superstar was borderline nonsensical. Suddenly the crowd surged forward and the sound around them increased tenfold. Logan, unprepared for this sudden change in his environment was almost engulfed by the crowd, only saved by his friend sheer determination, grabbing his hand and barging anyone who dared to interfere with their prime position. Virgil could only see the very top of the blood red styled hair over someone else head, but as he moved along the carpet with his entourage following en suit Virgil swore he could drop dead right then and there. Princey smiled a wide, perfectly straight, perfectly white grin as he waved to the crowd, blowing kisses every so often. He now wore a red leather jacket over the silver glittery undershirt he had worn on stage, both tailored perfectly to fit his broad shoulders and slim waist. His white jeans were slightly scuffed at the ankles and knees, torn along the front in just the right places, making the olive skin peaking through appear even more tanned. Large sunglasses obscured most of his face but that didn’t matter to Virgil. He didn’t need to see those piercing green eyes to know that it was him. Right in front of him, if only for a moment. It was him. And the look on his face was something else. It was him, and he was so happy to be there. In a place with so many people he had reached and helped and who loved him for it. And though he knew the thought was ridiculous, that he was just another head in the crowd, Princey was so happy to be there with him, too. Logan found himself staring too, although his expression was drastically different than Virgil’s. Virgil’s face contained the kind of euphoria the he seldom let himself feel, much less express. The kind that would allow him to come out the other side of any awful experience still as peppy as Patton Truscott midway though a halftime show. Logan on the other hand, was completely lost in thought. Part of him was amazed that they had managed to pull it of. Part of him wondered how he hadn’t seen it before. Now that he was here it was obvious. The Remus and Roman Stewart did make a habit of acting rather stragely. Micellaneous doctor and dentist appointments pulled one or both of the twins out of class far too often for it to fit to any kind of regular health schedule. Their facial structure resembled Princey's to a tee, excluding his hair and eye colour which could easily be manipulated. For christ sake his first song to take off last Summer was literally called BEST OF BOTH WORLDS LOGAN HOW DAFT COULD YOU HAVE POSSIBLY BEEN. As the star and his posse reached the limousine, Logan snuck a look at his starstruck best friend, then back at the limo as another familiar face with less familiar electric blue hair stepped into the car behind the quote unquote “Rockstar”. “Okay they’re in the car, they’re leaving, time for us to go too.” Logan pulled Virgil by the wrist slightly, almost surprise when his friend followed willingly. He was quiet as they walked back to where Logan had parked, and most of the drive to drop him back home, unable to come up with much more than a couple of breathy half-words as Logan pulled off of the highway and into Virgil’s neighbourhood. He didn’t mind. This certainly was an interesting development, which he hypothesised would more than likely lead to equally interesting results. But first, an adequate circadian rhythm needed to be maintained, and further investigation was required. 

---------------------------------------------------------------

A/N: SO hey void here’s the first part of the thing I was talking about a while ago bc I felt like it was too good for ya’ll not to see and also I’m scared it’ll get lost in my unfinished writing tag forever. Don’t expect a part two until at least the end of next week cause homegirl has hella exams, anyway, onto the story and special thanks to the people that helped me figure out a direction for this story in the first place. (@frikijedai @datfearlessfangirl ya’ll are real one’s, sorry I couldn’t make them both miley lmao)

Tags: @nadja-chamack16 

[callunavulgari]

TOP 25 FICS OF 2019

1. these roads will take you into your own country by @notbecauseofvictories | American Gods | Laura Moon/Mad Sweeney | WIP | 33k

Here’s a joke for you: a Muslim, a zombie, and a leprechaun walk into a bar in Misery, Indiana. No one stares, because no one in the puckered, shitty asshole of Misery, Indiana gives a fuck. The Colts are playing.

Heather Says: So. It’s funny that another of @notbecauseofvictories‘s stories is at the top of my list again this year. Keep in mind this list is sorted by when the fic was read rather than favorites (because that would get real complicated real quick). Clearly there must be something about January. There’s just something about the writing that is easy to slip into, be it a Star Wars fic or a Labyrinth fic or even a fic about Johnny and the Devil. This was lovely and I can’t wait until it’s finished.

2. eighteen wheels on an uphill climb by @honkforhankcon | Detroit: Become Human | Hank/Connor | 91k

Hank is going to die. He’s going to die right here in Kentucky, 53 years old, halfway to broke, and tragically sober. Survived only by a nine-year-old St. Bernard and the 31-year-old twink who delivered the fatal blow.

Heather Says: I don’t think that this is the first DBH fic that I sought out after beating the game, but it is the first that I loved enough to make it to this list. I didn’t think that I would go for a modern au for this fandom, certainly not a modern au wihere Hank is a truck driver and Connor is a sex worker (albeit briefly?) but here I am.

3. Fuck pride (pride only hurts, it never helps) by ImogenGotDrunk | Detroit: Become Human | RK900/Gavin Reed | 41k

After the android uprising, Connor becomes a permanent fixture in the DPD. That’s fine. Gavin can accept that. The dipshit’s more human than he used to be, and a decent detective to boot. Gavin can deal with him being around. What Gavin cannot deal with is Connor’s replica; two inches taller, blue-eyed, and with a mouth that Gavin doesn’t know whether to punch or take between his teeth. The RK900 model has been assigned as his partner for the foreseeable future.

Heather Says: I also never thought that I’d like a fic with Gavin in it. But I got curious about all the Reed900, and well, this fic really won me over. The writing is fantastic, and it softens Gavin while still keeping him believable. Also, well, I like the enemies to lovers thing.

4. Almost Cool by @blacktofade | Buzzfeed Unsolved | Ryan/Shane | 30k

While filming the Yuma Territorial Prison episode, Shane gets bitten by what he thinks is a bat. Spoiler alert: it's not.

Heather Says: This is actually the first thing that I read for this fandom. In fact, this is the fic that got me into Buzzfeed Unsolved in the first place. I’d seen a lot of art and gifs and fics pass my way, but I was only ever slightly interested in what I saw until this fic came through my inbox and piqued my curiosity. 

5. Pride by @astolat | Game of Thrones | Jaime/Brienne/Cersei | 22k

Jaime didn’t understand why Cersei suddenly insisted on trimming his hair and shaving his beard, but he also didn’t care to fight her on it, even though he’d just as soon have kept the beard: it was bitterly cold in the small tower room with its arrow-slits. 

Heather Says: Wowza. This fic was intense. I’ve always loved Jaime and Brienne. I’ve loved them since the second book, which was read at least a few years before I started loving them in the show. Adding Cersei to their dynamic would have probably been almost impossible to pull off if it was anyone else, but @astolat lives to surpass my expectations.

6. Skin and Scales by Ernmark | The Penumbra Podcast | Lord Arum/Sir Damien/Rilla | 18k

The man glares, and this time, Damien is certain it isn’t a trick of the light: those eyes are violet as amethyst. He wears disdain like a second skin–- or, perhaps, like the scales that he is missing. “Lord Arum?”

Heather Says: I was one of those people who skipped through all of the Second Citadel episodes during my first listen through of Penumbra. The stories were good, but the pull of Juno was too great. A couple months after I finished, I went back and listened to everything I didn’t. And let me tell you. Lizard monster. Honorable knight. Bookish girlfriend. Poly. It hit every single button I had and then some. This fic really hit the spot when I ran out of story.

7. someone you like by caela | She-Ra | Adora/Catra | 5k

catwithabat u think ur so hipster but u just look like a lesbian 27m she_ra @catwithabat bc… i’m a lesbian. lmao 5m

Heather Says: Noooot usually a big fan of high school fics. Namely because I’m not in high school anymore and well, after you read so many in your teenage years they sort of lose their luster. This one was phenomenal enough to change my mind.

8. Sands of Time by @tirsynni | Legend of Zelda | Ganondorf/Link | WIP | 98k

Link awakens in the desert with no idea how he got there, to encounter his worst enemy...except it was the King of the Gerudo, not the King of Evil, he faced.

Heather Says: I have seen a lot of really good Link/Ganondorf art over the years, but never really stumbled across a fic that didn’t have judicious amount of non-con involved. But the Breath of the Wild 2 trailer happened, and everybody started drawing really pretty art, so I went looking. And lo and behold, @tirsynni saved the day with this gorgeous time travel/fix-it fic. 

9. killed with kindness by veterization | Persona 5 | Akechi/Akira | 52k

Goro can't quite figure out why so many people keep acting like they're his friend. (Or: the one where the Phantom Thieves decide to know thy enemy, befriend thy enemy, love thy enemy, crush on thy enemy).

Heather Says: I’ve read a couple of veterization’s fics over the years, and to date they have never disappointed me. They published this in June, and I think I clicked on it mostly because I was bored and hadn’t read any good P5 fic yet. This was basically just what the doctor ordered, and I was really happy to find something where Akechi’s story went ever so slightly different.

10. paper thin by @ebonybow | Buzzfeed Unsolved | Ryan/Shane/Sara | 9k

Shane’s new neighbors are a morning-sex kind of couple.

Heather Says: So I went into this one knowing very little about how Sara fit into things. I didn’t know she was Shane’s girlfriend. I’d never even seen her, but I clicked because I like poly and I trust the author. I was 100% not disappointed. There’s also another fic with a very similar dynamic here, which is also aces.

11. damn.nation, now available on itunes by @kaikamahine | Good Omens | Aziraphale/Crowley | 11k

When lowly tempt-pusher Amphora (formerly of Stairwell 7B North, before she Fell,) gets the notice that end times are nigh, she gleefully quits her job and cancels her Netflix subscription and takes her place among the legions of hell. This, it turns out, was a bad plan.

Heather Says: Elizabeth may have only written one fic this year, but she made it a damn good one. I’ve always loved her OCs especially, so I was pretty tickled that this is 10k+ of outsider pov. Also, demons! Demons are great! This demon is great! I want like 9 seasons and a movie about Amphora, just saying.

12. The Dragon and Her Wolves by hapakitsune | Game of Thrones | Jon/Sansa/Daenarys | 60k

When the truth of Jon's birthright is revealed, control of the North and Daenerys's claim to the Iron Throne are both called into question. To preserve their tenuous alliance and secure her rule, Daenerys puts aside her personal feelings to arrange a marriage of political convenience between Jon and Sansa Stark.

Heather Says: What do you mean season 8 didn’t exist and the show totally ended with a three way relationship between the two most powerful women in Westeros and Jon Snow? Never been a big fan of Jon/Sansa before this, but this is another of those writers that I would literally trust if they wrote a fic about a fork and a spoon.

13. never tell me the odds by @wildehacked | Wolf 359 | Eiffel/Hera | 9k

“I tried Star Wars," he says, adjusting the phone under his neck, "and it was way underwhelming.”

A shaky breath from her end. “Well, where did you start?”

Heather Says: I don’t remember which of @wildehacked‘s fandoms I started reading first. Most recently it’s been The Magnus Archives (more on this later). The point is, they’d written Wolf 359 fic and it had Hera and Eiffel and it was literally everything that I’ve been looking for since the series ended.

14. Find Me Somebody by raiining | Good Omens | Warlock/Adam Young | 11k

“You left me,” he said. “You both left me, for him. And I can’t even blame you, because I’d have left me for him too.”

Heather Says: There was an Art. The art was lovely. So I went looking, because that’s what I do when faced with beautiful art depicting a rare pairing. And I found the holy grail. Like, possibly my favorite Good Omens fic? Ever? 

15. flirting with fire by @brawlite | Stranger Things | Billy/Steve | WIP | 7k

Steve's a cop, Billy's a firefighter. It's not a grudge, it's just a regular old small town rivalry.

Heather Says: Okay so brawlite has written a lot of great stuff this year (more on that later), but I read this in bed at the beach house this August while I was reeling from both a horrible sunburn and like seven hours of mild to moderate day-drinking while everyone else was still throwing back shots right outside my bedroom door. Jaws was playing on the tv and I wasn’t even paying attention to it, because THIS. Long story short, I’ve been thirsty for more ever since.

16. gold, when you find me by mmtion | The Flash | Iris/Barry | 53k

It's not that Iris hates The Flash, per say - more that she hates writing about The Streak in a weekly, pun-heavy comic based on The Flash.

Heather Says: I never would have thought that a canon pairing would make it to my Top 25 list, but here we are. I like Iris/Barry a lot better when they don’t grow up together and spend a lot of time playing the Superman game, apparently. Also, this was really well-written, and sexual tension has never been something I’ve felt from Barry and Iris, but I felt it in this fic. Just. Damn.

17. never gets old by @brawlite & @toast-ranger-to-a-stranger| Stranger Things | Billy/Steve | 78k

Falling in love with a cam boy named KingSteve isn't the smartest thing Billy Hargrove has ever done, nor is it the most healthy -- but the good choice is rarely ever the fun choice, and Billy is all about living life fast and loose.

Heather Says: Told you I’d come back to it. brawlite and toastranger are a fantastic team. last year was cherry pie and under the covers, this year it’s camboys and cop/firefighter dynamics. Also, I have a really strange fascination with fics where a character has an instragram. It’s really, incredibly strange. Also also, every time I see this fic title I get that one Discovery Channel song stuck in my head. And no, it probably isn’t the one you’re thinking.

18. ways to save the world by @wildehacked | The Magnus Archives | Martin Blackwood/Jon Sims | 19k

“I left you,” Martin says softly.

Heather Says: And we’re back at wildehacked too! The Magnus Archives was a thing that happened to me. This is I think the first fic I read for it while listening, and it was so very close to what we got in canon. I think when it comes down to it though, I still prefer this fic, even if the ending of this season was pretty fantastic.

19. The Denial Twist by beethechange | Buzzfeed Unsolved | Ryan/Shane | 35k

“This is kind of surreal,” Shane says, taking a sip of his tea. It’s piping hot and delicious, except it tastes like hot chocolate and not like tea at all. “Sort of—Wonka-esque, right? Or Alice in Wonderland.”

Heather Says: While the vampire one is my favorite both because it is excellent and because it was my first, this one was bizarre and sexy and also I read it like only a month or so ago! The dancing was my favorite part, but having dreams to work with made this story fantastically interesting and I loved every second of it.

20. silver in our lungs by taywen | Spinning Silver | Miryem/The Staryk Lord | 4k

The marks had been with Miryem for as long as she could remember. There were a number of them, all the same shade, following one after the other around her left wrist. They were pale as old scars, though they felt no different from the rest of her skin, and her mother claimed that Miryem had been born with them.

Heather Says: I really like soulmate aus. There’s so many different ways to twist them and the way they can sometimes change the dynamic entirely and other times not change them at all is just fascinating. I’ve been hoping there would be more Spinning Silver content on ao3 and running into this while I was trying to decide what I wanted to do for yuletide was a real treat.

21. you got me begging, begging, i'm on my knees by plalligator | The Queen’s Thief | Attolia/Eugenides/Costis | 5k

Costis has a particularly enlightening evening. (or, that struggle when you're a guard who's in love with your rulers and it turns out you would kind of like it if they bossed you around a little)

Heather Says: I accidentally re-read the King of Attolia and it made me consider ships I had perhaps not previously considered. This was really lovely and just steamy enough.

22. something more alive than silence by pageleaf | The Queen’s Thief | Attolia/Eugenides/Costis | 21k

It was a good thing that six months after the king had promised to halve the guard, he still hadn’t done it, because since then, there had been two attempts on the king’s life.

Heather Says: I want to only type the words AGONIZED NOISES to describe this fic because that’s basically my headspace when I get 21k of a shiny new ot3, but I mean. Really. This is super good and maybe my favorite yet? Why didn’t I start reading this fandom when I first read the books?

23. Timing it Right by DragonBandit | The Bright Sessions | Mark/Damien | 14k

The dragon chooses, Mark knows that as well as any boy born in a weyr. He'd never considered what that would mean if the dragon picked someone you hated. He's starting to think that was a mistake.

Damien's gold rises at Whitney. Mark tries to make things right.

Heather Says: This should actually be somewhere back in March, but I apparently closed out of the tab at some point. I never really got into Pern much. I have the first three books, but got most of the way through the first one a long time ago and then never picked it back up. I didn’t think I would like this, mostly because of the fact that I hadn’t gotten into the books, but was surprised to find that I absolutely loved it.

24. Keep It In Your Sights Now by LuckyDiceKirby | Shades of Magic | Lila/Kell/Holland | 9k

Holland travels with Lila and Kell. Somewhere along the way, they reach an equilibrium.

Heather Says: I love the new things I’ve discovered during my yuletide trompings. I don’t think I ever actually considered this pairing when I first read the books, but I am just so enamored with the idea of the three of them together. Like, why did I not realize that potential back then? This was lovely, and I loved it, and I want so much more out of this pairing than what ao3 has to offer me.

25. Charioteer by petrichoral | The Queen’s Thief | Gen & Costis | 13k

Captured in battle and stuck in the Mede capital, Costis has given up all hope of seeing his country again. But Eugenides has a habit of turning up where he's least expected.

Heather Says: Technically this shouldn’t be on here because I only read it today, but it was really wonderful and so canon typical. Gen and Costis were perfect in it, Irene was perfect in it. Everyone was perfect and nothing hurts.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #268

“i got a switchblade wit that cuts like a bitch, and i think you two should meet.”

What was the shortest amount of time you’ve known someone before you’ve dated them? If you’ve never been in a relationship before, do you watch Scrubs? Jason and I knew each other like... I think two or three weeks? We clicked so fast. Are you a fan of inside jokes or do you tend to stay away from them? I... don't feel a particular way? Do you have any theatrical experience? If so, what have you done? No, I'm not into theater. Which movies currently out in theaters do you want to see? I don't know what's in theaters right now, but I don't think anyone does rn lol. Don’t you hate it when people talk about their relationships constantly? If it's seriously incessantly, yes. There's not a lot you can say to have a conversation when they just ramble about the person, especially when you don't even know the partner. How close would you say you are to your relatives? Not very. What’s your favorite Pokemon? Ninetales. If you could have anyone to do your eulogy, who would it be and why? Well, I'd assume my parents will be dead by that point, so. Probably my best friend. If you play the Sims games, which one is your favorite? I've only ever played Sims Animals, which I looooved back in the past. I haven't played it in years, though. If your parents searched your room, would they be mad at what they’d find? No. Ever taken a picture kissing somebody? Yes. Sex in the morning, afternoon or night? Morning is a great start to the day, but only after your teeth are brushed. I cannooooot do morning breath. Do you want someone aggressive or passive in bed? Aggressive. I am such a sub lmao. How serious are your feelings for the person you like? I DON'T KNOWWWWWWWWWW Ever had your driver's license suspended? Don't have mine to begin with. Does the person you like know that you like them? Yes. How frequently are you inclined to read, and how much? Somewhat rarely lately, less than I did some months back. I would read some pretty big chunks. When was the last time you questioned the direction your life was taking? LMAOOOOOOOOO I'm not exaggerating at all when I say that's like, a daily occurrence. What small things have the ability to get under your skin? I'm trying to think of something I haven't said before, but I'm not sure. OH, it may seem like a small thing, but letting balloons go outside. It's littering. Many end up in the ocean. What is something small that has the ability to cure a bad mood? A car ride riding shotgun with music blaring. I fucking love it. What was the last big change through which you went? Some moral beliefs altered. ^ Do you deal well with change, typically? Have you always? Fuck no. It blows up my anxiety. How do you feel after spending a great quantity of time online? I used to feel kinda guilty, and I actually still do, but it's more subdued. It's just too normal by now, to the point when I'm bored, I sometimes briefly forget there are other things to do that aren't on the computer. God it's sad. What do you consider to be the biggest drawback to being you? I'M BIG SCARED OF EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!! What do you consider the best part of being who you are? I'm really understanding and can relate to people's pain well. What kinds of things do you have on display in your room? Christ, a lot. My room is STUFFED with decorations that make me happy.  There's posters, some artwork, all my Silent Hill game cases or manuals + more SH stuff, meerkats galore, Venus is in here, I have this "shrine" for Teddy... I've got a load of stuff. What do you think your room and its contents say about you, if anything? I love a lotta stuff, ig. Animals, music, dark stuff, games. When was the last time you felt insecure about something/some situation? UMMMMM I should have a question for this fucking immediately. I'm sure it was something when I was at Ashley's inlaws for Mother's Day. What is something about which you are very confident or self-assured? My knowledge of meerkats lmaooo. Which emotional sensation inconveniences or bothers you the most? FUCKIN ANXIETY. Do you ever find it awkward to compliment another being? No, I love love love giving compliments!! When was the last time you had a new experience? What was it? Hm. I guess nightmares where I literally flail and attack shit while shrieking. Do you dress more for yourself, or to the expectations of others? I dress entirely for myself. What is one way you cope when you feel like crap? Binge music I can relate to. Which can make it worse, but sometimes helps. I'll usually get to the point of being teary and cry a bit, but then I start feeling better. Name an insult you regularly receive, if there is one? I guess it's not really an... insult, per se, but I hear "you're too quiet!" all the time. What is something you used to believe about life that you no longer do? Everything happens for a reason. Nope. What is something you hope you never have to do again? Deal with another Jason-level heartbreak. Of the many different American accents, which one is your favorite? I'm actually not sure. Not a fan of any that I can think of. Do you know anyone who had a kid before they were financially stable? Oh yeah, plenty normal nowadays. Is there anything hanging from the doorknob in your room? Yes, the pink bead necklace from my sister's baby shower for Emerson. Sometimes I hang my purse there too. Why did you move to where you're living now? We got evicted for not being able to keep up with rent and needed a cheap but semi-decent place to live. What was the most severe punishment your parents gave you when you were growing up? I remember I was grounded from the computer for at least a week, maybe more. My punishment was always taking technology away and/or spanked or popped on the arm. I remember she once hit my arm so damn hard that I had her handprint there for a while. My mom was horrible at *keeping* me and my sisters grounded, though; she'd normally calm down within a few days and things would return to normal. What was the topic of conversation the last time you spoke to a sibling? Ummm I don't remember. I should, I saw one just a couple days ago. Are you currently looking for a new job? I don't have a job currently, but while Mom has cancer and surgery coming up, I'm not really looking, but pondering opportunities. She'd have to drive me, which just can't be done right now, and I'm also not comfortable leaving her home alone right now. Who is the person you are the closest to? (emotionally, not physically) Mom. What was the last caffeinated drink you had? Do you drink this often? Strawberry Sunkist, and ugh, too much lately. Whose photo did you last look at? I was on Facebook a bit ago, so someone's on there. Who was the last person to pick you up? You mean like, physically? I don't know, probably Girt because he got a kick out of our height difference and he would do that when we hugged. What are you wearing around your neck? Nothing right now. Have you accidentally mistaken a stranger for someone you know? Oh my god, yes. I did that at the tattoo parlor once at a guy that looked like my sister's ex, who I got along with well. He looked at me like "uhhhhh" and it will haunt me forever. Who did you last blow a kiss at? Venus. I do that and wave a lot when she comes out of her hide and looks my way. Have you ever seen lava in real life? No. Who did you last bite? Um I don't just casually go around biting people lmao. Probably Jason. Do you remember the date of your prom? Ha, it's honestly surprising to me that I don't recall the date of either, considering how I remember, y'know, a weird amount of obscure details through our entire time knowing each other. Was your last kiss long and sensual or short and sweet? Why’s that? Short and sweet, because it was just a goodbye kiss. When kissing, do you like to be on top or bottom? Good Lord, am I a bottom. I hated being on top because I felt he had a better view of me and my body, and I was self-conscious as shit even when I was fit. Does your boyfriend/husband know what size your boobs are? UHHHHHHHHHHHHH I don't have a boyfriend but I've sure never actually talked about it with any. Do you have hair extensions or do you think those are strictly for the scene kids? ..... No? I don't wear extensions, never have, but wearing them doesn't tie you to a label??? List all the things you have from your boyfriend at your house right now? Not everyone has a boyfriend, friend. Last time you exercised and for how long? I DON'T WANT TO THINK OF THIS lkja;dslkfjwe Last girl who called you hot/sexy/something else of the sort? I shared a picture of myself on Facebook for once just the other day, so let's so. *checks* HAHA MY MOM. #1 cheerleader, friends. OH I should probably clarify she said "gorgeous," but I guess that counts? Was she hitting on you? Jfc no. Last guy who called you hot/sexy/something else of the sort? Does getting a comment from Ian of a Spongebob screenshot of Squidward with heart eyes count? lol Was HE hitting on you? *shrugs* He's very open with sharing love for his friends though, so it very well could've been just friendly support. Have you ever taken the 5,000 question survey? Parts of it, and God did it get stupid. What would you do if your boyfriend/husband got drafted into war tomorrow? I. Am single. And not everyone. Is interested in guys. But hypothetically, I would fucking panic. I physically wouldn't be able to handle an s/o in the army; I would constantly, absolutely constantly, be actively fearful. We'd have to find a way to get him out of it. Has a guy ever touched your butt without permission? If so, how did this make you feel? I don't believe so, thank God. How many formal dresses do you own? Sun-dresses? I have two prom dresses (which I'm finally comfortable enough to get rid of at some point) and I think like... one or two other black knee-length dresses that I could now never fit into? What do you hope you grow out of? Social anxiety. It ruins many parts of my life. What is the healthiest and unhealthiest thing you do on a regular basis? Healthy? Oh fuck. I, uh, usually have one bottle of water, I guess? Unhealthy, definitely drink soda. I need to stop. When looking for a SO, what three things are most important (besides looks)? Kindness, patience, and compassion or understanding. How much do you judge a person by their appearance? Define "judge" here. Like, I can conclude someone is impoverished or well off in many cases, but I don't judge them as people. What is the most embarrassing thing you own? Hm. I'm unsure. What is the strangest habit you have? I don't think I have odd habits. What movie made you cry the most? The Notebook or Old Yeller, I think. What was one of the happiest moments of your childhood? Realizing I was getting a dog for Christmas. Fuck, I miss Teddy. What belief do you have that most people disagree with? I'd rather not get political right now. Who or what inspires you to be a better person? I fucking hate admitting it, but Jason. The last thing he told me was to stop saying "I'll try" but rather "I will," and I actually recently almost had a breakdown about it because I shouldn't put SO much value into what he says, make it holy "rules." I treat him like a god in so many ways. Still, in my stupid head, his word is law. I still want to make him so proud. What’s the TLDR description of your last relationship? Long-distance was getting extremely hard, but I think the bigger factor was that we both have problems we need to work on before we can properly support one another. If you found out your current life has been just a dream, would you choose to wake up? (You don’t know if your real life would be better or worse.) I guess... no. I'd be too afraid of it being any worse than it already feels. What dumb thing did you believe for a really long time? Political and religious beliefs I don't at all like admitting I had. Where would you like to retire? Hell if I know, that's a long whiles away. What brings you the most joy in life? Oh yikes. Family and close friends, probs. What was the last song that got stuck in your head? "Blush" by Jeffree Star is on repeat ahhhh What is something you enjoy doing, but aren’t good at? Drawing people. I don't really do it BECAUSE I'm not very good. In art in general, I have a hard time with proportions. Name some healthy foods that you enjoy eating. Strawberries, apples, a lotta other fruits, broccoli, there are these granola and cashew bars I LOVE, salad can be good, scrambled eggs... now I'm blanking. Like there are a lot of foods that can be on either end of the spectrum, depending on how they're prepared. Do you ever eat dry cereal as a snack to munch on? Any particular kind? No, generally too crunchy and dry. When you run out of something to drink & are thirsty, are you quick to retrieve a new beverage or are you lazy about it? It depends on how thirsty I am and what I'm doing at that moment. What is your favorite part of a slice of pizza? BITCH all of that motherfucker. What was the longest power outage you ever experienced? Two or so days. I was so, so scared for Venus because it was in the winter. Poor girl was scared. I had to let her inside my hoodie and shirt to use my warmth for a lengthy period at a time, there were blankets draped over her terrarium... I was genuinely afraid she was going to die. But nope, my baby is good and thriving. :'D Do you believe that children should do all of the chores around the house, or do you think the parents should do them? Or do you have an entirely different opinion? As someone who was raised with chores poorly enforced and now I suck at doing them, they should ABSOLUTELY be a required thing. Children shouldn't do *all* the chores though, of course, especially those involving serious chemicals. Have you ever painted a pet’s nails, or known someone that has done such? Do you think that is cruel? I haven't, but I suppose it depends on whether it's toxic or not and if the animal doesn't mind? I do know people who have. What is something you did as a child that you didn’t realize back then was “wrong”, if anything? I didn't know interracial relationships were perfectly fine. It's funny, I don't recall me seeing black as any less than whites, I just thought it wasn't supposed to happen. Being raised in the South does that, ig. Do you get an excessive amount of bug bites during spring/summertime? Are you one to itch constantly or can you control yourself? No, I've heard because I have A-type blood. Whenever my sister (O-type) and I used to play outside, she would always come in COVERED in mosquito bites, and she's still a magnet for them today. Supposedly bugs don't prefer A, but O the most. I do itch, though. Holy shit, do I itch. Do you own any sports equipment [balls, basketball goals, mitts, etc] that you rarely use? No. Could you ever willingly hunt down & shoot an innocent animal for sport? Over my dead fucking body. Would you be uncomfortable changing someone else’s baby’s diaper? Ugh, I have twice I believe, and I hated it. Have/would you ever want to own a pet frog, or do you think they would be too boring? I don't think I've ever caught and kept one? I don't mind "boring" pets, I just don't desire one. What internet/television provider do you use? Fucking CenturyLink. Stay away from it. Are you uncomfortable going out in public with leg stubble? Even if it’s so light that no one would notice it unless they were looking for it? That much, no. Now I literally haven't shaved my legs in over a whole year because it's not like anyone sees them, but holy fuck would I be mortified if someone did lol. Have you ever lived in a mobile home? No. I'm terrified to because of tornados. Have you ever had your bedroom in a basement? No. What’s your favorite piece of furniture in your house? ...? If someone gave you a kitten, would you keep it? I'd want to, but it'd be Mom's decision. Favorite type of cracker: Cheez-Its. Animal you like to watch but sort of creeps you out: Spiders, especially when they're making their webs.

[nickblaine]

script notes part 1 (nick)

i stopped by the Screen Writer’s Guild library and read the screenplays for both seasons of The Handmaid’s Tale. i couldn’t be there for long and i was mainly interested in Nick’s perspective, so i only read scenes that he was named in and skimmed the rest.

you can’t take photos or transcriptions in the library, but i took a lot of notes so here are some cool facts about Nick and his relationship with June that i learned from the scripts (with spoilers of course)

Nick is GOOD. so so GOOD. even though he is a bit mysterious and aloof at first, his strong sense of morals come across very clear in the script early on. he’s written as a sympathetic character and an ally from the very beginning. we are meant to like him in spite of his status, as June does.

anyone who thinks June is too traumatized to want physical intimacy is so wrong. June has a crush on Nick since episode 1, even though she knows in her gut he is probably an Eye. in fact the first few episodes almost read like a romantic drama because June thinks about him so much.

Nick and June’s first kiss was not 1x05, it was actually 1x03. when Nick brings her ice for her bruises and tells her they should’ve driven away together, June becomes overwhelmed by the attraction and kisses him first. in fact, they fully make out and it’s described as “hands everywhere” until they abruptly stop. not sure why this was cut, but it explains why Nick is so breathless when he leaves her room 😂

did i mention June thinks about Nick a lot? because she thinks about him a LOT lmao the thirst was so real

the scene where Serena Joy orchestrates the Nick and June thing - the script points out that June was not mad about having to sleep with Nick, she was mad because she liked Nick and Serena was taking that away from her by forcing Gilead weirdness on them. also, during the actual act, it’s as awkward to read as it is to watch, but June is kind of excited about it, Nick is... horrified, and Serena Joy ruins it for everyone by being as creepy as possible. (i reeeally wish they made this scene true to the book by keeping Serena at a distance)

Nick telling June that he’s an Eye was huge. this was a real milestone, he took a massive risk by being truthful with her and they both recognized it. also his “now go to bed” was meant as a joke, which they both understood.

their (real) love scene actually had dialogue! it’s a lot different from the final cut. June jumps Nick and starts kissing him pretty much as soon as she walks through his door. he also does try to undress her but fumbles with her handmaid dress. June says, “Let me. It’s complicated.” and does it herself. Nick says, “Mine’s simple.” and just pulls off his shirt. it was adorably casual tbh and they read like a couple who had been courting for awhile. (alsoooo the script straight up says she guides his hand to where she wants it and Nick can take a hint, so like, there’s that 😏)

during the meeting the next day, when they secretly touch hands, Nick is described as “unable to breathe effectively” and tells her all the guards leave at 11:30 so she can visit him lmaooo this boy is in shambles

from this point on June thinks about Nick like, constantly. during scrabble she was literally starting to spell out his name on the board.

when June is going through the things in Nick’s room, he isn’t bothered at all. he understands that she’s curious about him, but their moments together are so limited and precious so he just wants to snuggle. sigh.

Nick flashbacks!!!! Nick is 100% baited into joining SoJ. that whole conversation in the cafe was about Pryce trying to work out Nick’s achilles heel and seizing on it, which was his brother. Nick had never even heard of SoJ, but he is “intrigued and desperate for a lifeline”

the flashback in the car when the commanders discuss the handmaids - this is the scene i was looking forward to most since Max is all body language in it, but i was disappointed. it’s 99% dialogue. although it did explain the “it’s better not to make attachments” line - Nick was actually referring to his brother when he said this, whom he “had to leave behind somewhere along the way” 😭

in June’s voiceovers she mentions more than once that she believes Luke would understand why she wants to be with Nick

at Jezebels - Nick is described as seething the whole time, but none of his lingering touches and intense stares are in the script. those were all Max and Lizzie.

apparently Nick and Beth’s deal is that they trade goods for intelligence. it doesn’t specify if the intelligence is for the Eyes or Mayday, though.

in the flashback when Nick finds the first Offred hanging, he goes as far as to give her mouth-to-mouth CPR even though it was clearly too late. he tried so hard tho 😭

also, this death totally broke him. when they take Offred 1’s body away is the moment Nick becomes “awake for the first time” and “sees Gilead for what it really is” - until that point he was just numb from the loss of his family. it’s also the reason he joined the Eyes - when Pryce offers his condolences for the dead handmaid, Nick’s inner thoughts are like “she’s the reason i’m here” 😭

there’s a cut scene from the Jezebels episode where Nick almost starts a fistfight with the other drivers because he’s just sf mad about Fred bringing June there, and everyone can pick up on the fact that something is really bugging him. i’m kinda bummed we don’t get to see this tbh, and it’s not the only scene showing Nick interacting with other Guardians to be removed from the final cut.

when Nick breaks it off with June because it’s too dangerous, his reason is genuine but he’s more cold and distant in the script. he doesn’t touch her at all when he's telling her about himself, that was entirely Max.

we already know this from interviews but when June tells Nick she’s pregnant they were both just overflowing with love for each other in that scene. she is shook to her core by his reaction to the news and it makes her realize that what they share is special and worth everything.

i have more notes from the season 2 script but i’ll make another post about it later because this one’s long enough 😩

[imagineseclipse]

Your Character Development Imagine

Season 1 Part 4

“Have I ever told you that I hate you?”you slumped down in the passengers seat of Stiles’ jeep. If you could even call it a jeep.

“Many, many times. In fact I think that’s the first thing you say to me when you see me”Stiles realised, raising his eyebrow slightly.

“Why are you mad? You just made me pay you 150 dollars to go to one party which by the way is not going to be fun because we have more important things to be worrying about”Stiles rambled on.

“You’re lucky you aren’t paying with your life”You retorted as you fastened your seatbelt.

“Sorry why do I even have to come? If you wanted moral support I’m not the person for it”

An idea flashed into your mind, you fluttered your eyelashes cunningly.

“Althoughhh, If you do want me to give you moral support that’s another 60 dollars for my services”you smirked.

Stiles almost choked on the oxygen surrounding him.

“Chill nerd I was kidding”you rolled your eyes before reaching forwards to turn up the music that had been playing in the background.

Stiles also reached forwards, turning the music back down to it’s original volume before facing your briefly.

“If we’re gonna be working with eachother we need to make some rules”Stiles nodded.

You snorted, suddenly realising that Stilinski was in fact being serious.

“I don’t play by the rules, especially if they are made by you”you informed the teen, who was trying his hardest to keep his eyes on the road.

“Well if you want my help you’re gonna have to compromise”Stiles tutted in response.

You found yourself mumbling profanities.

“Fine”you sighed.

A grin spread across Stiles’ face, a small smile made its way onto your own face but it quickly disappeared when you realised what was happening.

You were smiling. For once you were genuinely smiling.

“Fantastic okay rule one, you’re not allowed to call me names anymore”Stiles chirped.

“No”you shook your head.

“What do you mean no?!”Stiles gawped.

“When I call you names, it’s because I want to punch you-probably for your stupidity-so by all means if you want to make that a rule I’ll have to start punching you instead”you raised your eyebrows.

“R-right, well in that case s-scrap rule number one”Stiles spluttered out trying to shuffle over in the drivers seat, creating distance between the two of you.

“That’s what I thought”you hummed smugly.

“Rule one is that we have to spend time together so that I can observe you”Stiles stayed.

It took a second for the two of you to register what he had just said. You looked over at him, your nose scrunched up in disgust.

“I didn’t mean it like that!”Stiles exclaimed quickly.

“Sure thing Stilinski I knew you were stalking me”you teased.

“I’m your lab partner not your lab project”you added.

Stiles had noticed that recently there had been moments where you had been more playful with him. Not that he was complaining . In fact it made him more intrigued he wanted to know you.

Not the angry, misunderstood you, he wanted to know the y/n that people rarely got to see. Deep down Stiles believed you weren’t as bad as everyone made you out to be.

“I’m serious though, how am I gonna help fix this if I don’t personally see what’s going on with you”he said.

“I was kinda hoping that you’d do your own independent research throughout the week and then email me a report every Friday”you answered resting your head against the jeep window.

“I’m sorry y/n, this is a rule I’m just not getting rid of”Stiles put his foot down, quite literally aswell. Sending you flying forwards in your seat, you sent him a glare. The moon was rising and you had to get to this party before anything happened to Scott, or anyone else for that matter.

“That means I’m gonna have to see you and Scott everyday”you groaned.

“Look, you and Scott are going through the same thing. You never know you could help eachother” Stiles spun the wheel.

“I really doubt that”you whispered to yourself.

When you arrived you were immediately taken back by the sight of drunken teenagers, literally everywhere. The stench of alcohol and sweat invaded your nostrils and your ears practically started to bleed because of the loud music.

This wasn’t your scene at all, you shuffled closer to Stiles, leaning over slightly.

“Stiles, about that extra 60 dollars. I don’t think I’m joking anymore”you shouted over the music.

You sensed someone approaching you from behind, your eyebrows furrowing together and your fists clenching. The smell of perfume and anxiety circled you.

Stiles noticed your discomfort, he also took note of your glowing eyes. They were a brighter shade of grey this time. All of the smells and noises around you became intensified by a hundred, proving that a full moon really did effect the supernatural.

“Y/n, is everything okay?”he grew concerned.

“Yeah”you managed to reply through gritted teeth. You’re headache began to grow stronger along with the music.

“Okay rule number two, always be honest with eachother”Stiles gripped onto your shoulders.

“Rule number three, no touching”you pushed him away gently. The sense that someone was coming your way never left you.

“Y/n, I want you to stay right here. I’m going to find Scott”Stiles pointed towards the house before walking away.

“Don’t you dare leave me all alone at this stupid part- I’m going to kill him”you spoke to yourself realising that your protests weren’t getting you anywhere.

As if on queue you felt a tap on your shoulder, the perfume was almost intoxicating you. You spun around to see a very lost Allison Argent. So that’s who you had been sensing.

“Uh hi y/n right?”Allison sent you a friendly smile.

You shoved your hands in your pockets, sighing.

“Yeah that’s me, although I wish I wasn’t me at the moment”you mumbled.

“I thought you weren’t coming?”she laughed.

“I heard it was family night”you raised your eyebrow at the brunette, you’d overhead Scott’s conversation with Stiles earlier that week about Allison not going to Lydia’s party.

“You got me there”she laughed lightly.

Silence fell upon the two of you, both stood awkwardly. For a moment you could feel Allison’s emotions all at one time, she was confused and angry. You knew it wasn’t any of your business but something urged you to turn to Allison.

“What’s wrong?”you asked, not really experienced in the whole giving advice thing. You regretted asking the second after you opened your mouth.

“Is it that obvious?”She looked up at you, tucking her hair behind her ear.

“Yeah I can kinda tell by the look on your face”you lied, you’d actually been able to tell from a mile away you’d felt what she’d felt and it terrified you.

“That makes the two of us then”her eyes flickered towards yours for a second before she started to talk.

“What’s the deal with Scott?”she blurted out.

Your mouth dropped open, you couldn’t really tell her everything, that would be ridiculous she’d never believe you and she would definitely never speak to Scott again. Not that you actually cared. It would just be complicated.

“Scott? He’s just going through some things at the moment I guess, but Allison I’m not really that close to him but I can see he really likes you. Just don’t give up on him yet”you found yourself defending Scott for a moment, you didn’t know why though.

Allison didn’t understand why you were always alone

She responded with a nod, shooting you an award winning smile.

“Hey, do you want to come inside and have a drink with me and Lydia?”she offered.

“Uh I think I’m gonna have to pass, I’m waiting for someone, speaking of I should probably ring them”you noticed the time and you realised that you really were going to commit murder.

“Maybe I’ll see you around then?”Allison asked hopefully as she leant in, wrapping her arms around you. You stood awkwardly for a moment, frozen to the spot.

You patted her back slowly, slightly frightened at what was happening.

“Yeah maybe”you replied quietly.

As Allison walked away back into the party your eyes became fixated on Lydia’s house, without getting too close your eyes fixated on one of the windows downstairs. Green pupils peirced through yours and you got a weird vibe.

Derek Hale stood watching you, he didn’t show any emotion and it was weird because you couldn’t read him like you had Allison. It was almost like he knew what was happening because he furrowed his eyebrows at you before disappearing back into the crowd.

You began to embark on a quest to find out who Derek Hale actually was when you heard a cough come from behind you, you spun around to see Stiles Stilinski leant against Roscoe his arms folded.

“How did you-?”you looked back at the house trying to figure out when Stiles had left the party.

“What is up with everyone tonight, sneaking up on me it’s creepy”you complained.

“I never sneaked up on you, I’ve been here for a while now”Stiles confessed.

“How long?”You asked raising an eyebrow.

“Well long enough to know that you don’t give yourself enough credit, you did really well giving Allison advice”he sent you a nod, he was lowkey proud of you.

“So you were watching the whole time and you didn’t think to save me?!”you exclaimed angrily, you wouldn’t have been put in that awkward situation if it wasn’t for Stiles.

“You didn’t need my help, you were doing great by yourself”he protested.

“So did you find Scott in the end?”you asked as you opened the passengers side door.

“No y/n and I’m freaking out help me”Stiles whined.

“Well considering Allison was alone and she’s pissed maybe he bailed on her and went home?”you suggested.

Stiles clicked his fingers at you.

“Genius, why didn’t I put two and two together?!”he questioned himself as he sped off in the direction of the McCall house.

“Take me home first”you groaned.

[randomlynormalgirl]

Joker Movie Thoughts

this is a bunch of jumbled, unstructured thoughts about the joker movie because I can’t stop thinking about it and I needed to write at least some of my thoughts down. might add to it every now and then. hope you enjoy it anyway if you end up reading it :)

MASSIVE SPOILERS BELOW THE CUT!!!!!!

watching the ‘joker’ movie felt like a very visceral experience for me. the movie manages to hold and intertwine many complicated themes alongside the plot so eloquently that I am not surprised it received an 8 minute standing ovation. I will be personally outraged if Joaquin phoenix does not receive an Oscar for his portrayal of the joker character because he manages to perfectly display the descent into madness as well as the tragedy of the movie. This movie manages to make you want to sympathise with Joker because the course of events leading up to him becoming the joker is very tragic and given the right circumstances would turn any sane man mad, yet you know you shouldn’t empathise with him because you understand he is mentally ill and that he sees violence as the only way to exact his revenge. Every scene in the movie is a trailer moment yet I didn’t feel like the movie was spoiled for me in any way.

Another aspect of the movie I liked is that Joaquin Phoenix manages to use his acting skill so well that he can subtly show how the joker’s descent into madness builds to a crescendo so spectacularly. How the first dance he does after his first kills is slow and controlled compared to that when he is fully embracing his madness and dancing on the steps so freely, because in his madness he is set free. It reminds me of Midsommar in that way slightly. Also, Joaquin’s body during the movie was also a strange sight and the dedication he put into the role to make himself look that skinny and ill simply astounded me. also, knowing that Joaquin improvised the dancing in the bathroom after Arthur's first three murders makes the scene all the more eerie to me. i hope he looked after himself after he finished filming for the movie because i dread another heath ledger situation, i don't think my heart could take it

I also appreciated that despite the amount of violence in the movie, a lot of the deaths are actually not shown. I think it’s a sign of good acting and good directing when the audience can guess what’s happened behind the scenes just from a few context clues (such as the end of the movie when he leaves the therapists office trailing bloody footprints)

I saw someone on twitter say that the joker movie is just Marxism in practise and honestly I can't fault their logic. The working class leading a violent revolution against the top 1% because they want better than the shitty lower hand they have been dealt, the fact that the newspapers in the film literally call it the 'kill the rich' revolution, the fact that Thomas Wayne literally calls them all clowns and it only ends up spurring on the revolt further. i mean, i can definitely see it.

The story is heartbreaking because it is believable. Watching as a mentally ill man is pushed to the extreme due to funding cuts for his therapy which ultimately stopped him getting the medication he needed to stay sane, poverty, an abusive childhood, a mentally ill mother whilst also living in a classist society where the working class are oppressed by people like Thomas Wayne. A good example of this to me is his first trio of murders; he only killed them because the three Wall Street type guys were going to beat him to death had he not pulled out the gun to kill them, yet it is certain that if Arthur had been killed by those men no one would care because he was not someone worth reporting on in the eyes on the media. In short, anyone below middle class in Gotham were considered nobody and they had enough. Arthur merely sparked the rebellion.

I enjoyed how the joker didn’t plan to become a political figure in the movie. He unintentionally becomes a martyr to the people of Gotham and how that tied in with the origins of batman was a very cool moment for me as part of the audience.

To add to this, the ending of the movie being dubious was an interested touch. Throughout the movie we learn that we cannot always trust Arthur’s perspective. From his fantasy of being on his idol’s TV show, down to his delusion of the romance between him and Sophie. So, the idea that the end of the movie suggesting it was all in his imagination was interesting to me. I, however, don’t subscribe to such a theory because I think the final flash of Bruce with his dead parents was the director giving us that subtle hint that this time the joker wasn’t just dreaming of being successful and loved by many, it was real this time. A slightly less important note but the aesthetic of the whole movie was just very grainy and gritty and fit the film? like the old school format, the cinematography and the fucking SOUNDTRACK. 'that's life' by Frank Sinatra is one if my favourite songs and the fact is features so heavily in this movie was a really cool moment for me? i also really liked the whole riot scene; it just felt really raw and gritty and like a true climax to the joker's story as he finally becomes the persona fully and finds his new identity as the figurehead for this revolution in Gotham

Of course, I cannot talk about this film without mentioning my beloved heath ledger and his depiction of the joker, and the references and similarities between the two. Let me make one thing clear; phoenix’s and ledger’s joker are nowhere near the same. I remember reading that Joaquin and heath were very good friends, and that Joaquin did not in anyway want to impose on heath’s legacy. He understands how legendary that role was and said while he loves that portrayal he didn’t want to be a cheap imitation. I believe he has fully achieved such a feat but I cannot help but compare. Some ‘Easter eggs’ or possible homages to heath that I recognised were:

-the scene where Arthur is in the back of the police car reminded me very much of that scene in the dark knight where joker steals the cop car (ledger / phoenix). I realise that is is also supposed to parallel the scene earlier where he is sat all sad on the bus compared to how happy he looks in the police car but i didn't quite get it straight away.

-Arthur using his own blood to paint the smile on his face (x) after the car crash reminded me of the ledger makeup look

-Arthur saying to Sophie that he ‘had a bad day’ reminded me instantly of when heath ledger’s joker said something along the lines of ‘everyone is just one bad day away from being like me’

none-Ledger related Easter eggs I noticed too were:

-the protesters laying Arthur across the hood of the crashed cop car Jesus-style to signify that he's saintly to them was a nice touch -Bruce coming down the fireman’s pole was reminiscent of the Adam west batman series where they had to come down the fireman’s pole

-the joker being attached to the death of Bruce Wayne’s parents (although less directly in this depiction)

-the font of the late night talk show is the same as batman the animated series

-I’ve seen some people say that the backdrop of the talk show is the same during the titles of the animated series too

-joker killing the host was reminiscent of the dark knight returns where joker kills the audience of a TV talk show

-apparently the look of this joker is similar to that of one of his video game iterations but I can’t find that -the sort of reference to the inspiration behind the entire joker character by having Arthur have a condition where he can't help but laugh in certain situations, when the joker was based on the film 'the man who laughs' where a man is cursed to never stop smiling no matter how much he tries -major inspiration from taxi driver, which also features Robert De Niro so its a cool touch -some kind of reference to the movie 'the king of comedy', a movie centring around a person obsessed with a tv show host which has similar plot points and also features robert de niro again which is pretty cool

[emotionally-imbruised]

These Words Are My Heart and Soul

A/N: Hello, everyone. A couple days ago I posted about a concept idea that was inspired by the last scene in Season 1, Episode 7 of Gossip Girl (hence the gif above.) The episode is called Victor, Victrola... and ends with Chuck and Blair in the back of a limo as they drive home. They slowly inch closer and start making out while With Me by Sum 41 plays, and ugh what a mood.

“I forget,” you speak into your cell phone, as you walk over to the large window, and open up the curtains to allow sunlight to fill your hotel room. People bustle around the streets of New York City below, and you internally groan as you think about having to join the crowds in the upcoming hours of the day. “Did I agree to go to this thing? Because I don’t think I did, but yet here you are guilting me into going anyways.”

“Oh get over yourself,” Harry Styles; your best friend in the entire world, says to you from the other end of the call. “It’s the Met Gala, Y/N. You’re literally the only person in the world I can think of that wouldn’t want to go to an event like this with me.”

“Yeah I’d rather go with Gemma if I'm honest,” you pester, smirking to yourself. 

“Best friend of the year, you are,” he grumbles, and you can’t help but laugh at him. This is how the majority of your’s and Harry’s conversations go, but you wouldn’t trade it for a thing. The two of you have been best friends for years now, dating back to when he was still in One Direction. It took a little bit for your friendship to develop, but when it did you quickly became inseparable, and everyone had to deal with what that entailed. His friends and family were quick taking you in as one of them, and your family leaves a seat open for him every year at Christmas... It’s a good system. 

“Yeah, and don’t you forget it,” you tell him, and can just imagine the sight of him rolling his eyes at you. “But for real though, H. Isn’t this some super A-List event? You know I don’t belong in someplace like that.”

“Well that’s unfortunate for you because I already have a second ticket for you as m’date,” he explains.

“Oh, how kind of you,” you reply, sarcastically. “And unfortunately for you, I don’t have anything fancy to wear. Welp looks like I can’t go... What a shame.”

“You’re actually the worst,” he states between chuckles, as you plop down back onto your bed. “You really don’t want to go, do you?”

“What gave it away?” You ask and hear what you think is him smacking his hand to his forehead.

“Nothing at all,” he replies monotonously. “Hate to break it to you though, love, but there’s a dress in your hotel room closet for you to wear tonight. It’s your size, should fit like a glove; maybe go out and buy some nice heels for it though. Someone is coming to do your hair and makeup at 5pm, and a car will be there at 6:30pm to bring you to The Met.”

“Uh, pardon?” You demand and march over to the closet. You open it up, and sure enough, a beautiful burgundy coloured designer gown hangs there. “Harry, are you joking? I-I can’t wear that. Oh my god, this thing must’ve cost a fortune.”

“It doesn't matter what it cost,” he says. “I’ve got some ties in with Gucci, you know this.”

“Doesn’t defeat the purpose!” You exclaim and dramatically throw your free hand up into the air.

“Hmm you seem upset,” he points out obliviously, causing you to groan. “Well I mean, you do get a bit hangry in the morning. Maybe you should go get some breakfast.”

“Harry,” you speak up, trying to get yourself out of this.

“And then you can go buy your shoes,” he continues. “But make sure they’re comfy, you’ll be wearing them all night.”

“Harry,” you respond again, but it’s no use. 

“Then just go back to your hotel and get ready,” he rambles. “I won’t see you until tonight but-.”

“HARRY!” You yell this time, and he finally shuts up. “I still don’t want to go.”

“Will you go for me?” He asks, and you can hear the pout in his voice. Why must he do that? He knows it always works on you.

“I don't know, I-,” you start hesitantly, but he’s quick to cut you off.

“Sounds great. Thanks, Y/N, I’ll see you there. Love you, bye,” he spurts out quickly and ends the call. 

The line goes dead, and you just listen to it for a few seconds; pursing your lips at the noise. You let out a huff and hang up the phone, before tossing it onto the bed. “Guess I don’t really have a choice now, do I?” You ask aloud, and it takes a moment to realize that you’re talking to yourself. You shake your head at yourself and make your way to the washroom so you can shower and get ready for the day. 

A couple of hours pass, and you find yourself staring at your reflection in the full-length mirror in your hotel room. Harry was right, this dress fits you perfectly, and you’re even more mad at him because now you don’t want to take it off. 

The shiny, sexy heels, as well as the simple black cutch you went out and bought at a small shop near Central Park, look fantastic with the dress, and you’re feeling pretty good about how you look. You do one final twirl, but stop when a knock sounds at the door, and go to answer it. You’re met by two people on the other side of it, a man and woman, who greet you excitedly; telling you, Harry sent them to get you ready for tonight.

The two get straight to work, and an hour and a half later you’re all ready to go. You wave the two goodbye, thanking them both, before looking at yourself in the mirror once again. Your hair is in simple, yet elegant waves; and your makeup emphasizes your eyes, all while complimenting the dress... You look absolutely stunning, to say the least. 

You pick up your phone to see that it is nearing 6:30pm and realize you need to head downstairs now. With one final glance at yourself, you grab your phone, lipstick, and hotel room keycard; stuffing them into your clutch as you exit the room, and scurry to the elevator. 

The elevator doors ding open, and you catch the attention of other hotel guests with how dressed up you are. You look around for someone who may have a clue as to which car waiting outside is your ride, until a voice speaks up from behind you. “Miss Y/L/N?” It asks, and you turn around to face a man; nodding at him. “I’m your driver. Mr. Styles requested that we are leaving as soon as possible, so we arrive near the same time he does.” You don’t say anything, but nod in agreement, and let him lead you to the all-black car waiting outside.

Not long after, you’re still sat in the car as it waits to drop you off at the beginning of the red carpet leading up The Met’s iconic stairs. You sent Harry a text asking where he was, but he unsurprisingly didn't answer. The line of cars ahead of you get shorter and shorter until the limo directly in front of you reaches the carpet. 

You lean against the tinted window a little bit and watch as someone walks up, and opens the door. A rush of excitement hits you as you prepare to see which celebrity it is about to walk the red carpet, and your jaw drops when you know who it is. Harry steps out of the limo in a black designer suit, looking absolutely fabulous. The suit looks so good on him in every aspect, and you can’t stop your eyes from wandering down to his butt; which looks really good. You shake your head at the thought and feel odd, this is your best friend... It’s weird thinking of him that way.

Harry steps away from the limo as the person shuts the door behind him, and poses for the cameras. You become entranced by watching him and don’t realize that your car has moved forward until you’re directly behind him. It doesn’t sink in what’s happening until he turns around and opens the car door to greet you.

“Hey bub,” he smirks as he holds his hand out for you to take. You shake your head as a smile creeps across your features, and take his hand; so he can help you out of the car. You step onto the carpet, and soon, everyone is buzzing. You’ve starred in some media headlines throughout your friendship with Harry, but you’ve never seen anyone react like this when seeing the two of you together. Harry links your hand with his and leads you up the carpet as people start calling out for pictures. You both stop and pose for the insane amount of blinding flashes that emit from the different cameras, and you start feeling a bit nervous. As if picking up on how tense you’re getting; Harry, let’s go of your hand, and slowly wraps his arm around your waist. He pulls you closer to him, and leans down to whisper in your ear. “You look incredible by the way, Y/N.”

You feel a blush coming on strong as he says this, and moves away slightly. Your eyes gaze up to him, and you smile in thanks before nudging him with your arm slightly. He chuckles and grabs ahold of your hand again, so you can make your way up the stairs and into the event.

For the duration of the entire Met Gala, you stay with Harry; sipping on the champagne that’s being passed around, and trying not to seem like an awestruck idiot when other celebrities greet your best friend. The nerves you get from being around, so many famous and influential people are hard to avoid, no matter how nice they are when saying hi or chatting with you as well. Harry either keeps his hand linked with yours, his arm protectively around you waist, or even his hand on your knee while you’s are seated the entire time... And you don’t complain.

This 100% is not your scene, but you’re glad you got to experience something so extravagant with your best friend by your side and were thankful by how inclusive he was with you being there. 

By the end of the event, the two of you have just finished off another glass of champagne, and are more than ready to go home. Neither of you is tipsy by any means, but the alcohol definitely helped with calming your nerves that developed from being there. 

Harry takes your hand once again, and you walk down the steps towards the awaiting limo; not stopping for pictures this time. He opens the door for you again and goes around to get in on the other side before the driver takes off.

The two of you sit in comfortable silence as you make your way through downtown Manhattan, and Harry soon speaks up. “Did you have fun?” He asks, and you move your gaze from the window to his beautiful green eyes.

“I did,” you tell him with a smile. “Mainly because of you. Thank you for inviting me, H.”

“Anytime love,” he replies. “I enjoy taking you out.” You continue smiling to yourself as you lean back against the seat tiredly, and he does the same. 

“Thanks for driving me back to the hotel,” you add, and glance at him sideways.

He goes to respond, but stops and looks at you thoughtfully. “...You were, amazing tonight,” he starts. “Just like you always are.” You don’t know what to say as your heart feels as if it could burst, as well as the feeling as if magnets are trying to push the two of you together. You mindlessly scoot closer to him, as he leans in and your lips brush slightly. The two of you pull back a little bit and pause before he breaks the silence again. “You sure?”

So many thoughts run through your mind, screaming at you not to do this. But they become irrelevant as you look Harry in the eyes, and move closer; shutting them once your lips connect.

The kiss starts off as simple but soon gets heated, and you’re both craving to be closer to the on another. Harry's arms wrap around your waist once again, as he pulls you onto his lap, and you straddle him; deepening the kiss, and allowing his tongue to have full access to your mouth. His wandering hands bunch your dress, and your fists tangle themselves into his shaggy curls; gripping and pulling. He moves his hands up your back and begins leaning closer to you so he can lower you gently onto the seat. Not once does he break the kiss as he finds the zipper on the side of your dress, and starts unzipping it. You let him do this, and shiver slightly at the breezes hitting your exposed skin. He chuckles against your lips, and you just pull him in closer; also using him as warmth. 

You’s continue making out as he works on your dress, but are suddenly interrupted by the sound of the divider separating the front and back of the limo, lowering, and the limo driver speaking up. “So sorry to intrude,” he starts and tries his best to avoid making eye contact with the two of you. “But what was the name of the hotel Y/N is staying at?”

The blush of embarrassment covering your face is evident as you make a move to sit up straight again. Harry moves as well and helps you up as you use your other arm to keep the unzipped dress from exposing your chest. “Uh, it’s,-” you stammer and look to Harry.

His gaze softens once it meets yours, and his eyes seem to light up as if an idea just sprang to his mind. “Actually, change of plans,” he begins to explain to the driver. He looks at you, and you just look back completely confused. “Just take us back to my place, please.”

The driver nods and doesn’t say a word as he closes the divider again; leaving just you and Harry. You look to him and smirk, picking up on what he was doing. He watches you, awaiting some type of protest from you; but is caught off guard when you grab ahold of his shirt and move to straddle his waist again. You let your dress fall lose this time, and his eyes wander to your bra covered chest. He looks back to your eyes, and you crash you lips to his once again... Starting off what’s bound to be an exciting night between two best friends. 

[discyours]

I finished watching the latest season of Shameless and it’s reaffirmed to me how terrible this show is at LGBT representation so I’m gonna complain about it. Spoiler warning, obviously. 

Okay so first of all, Ian and Mickey were one of the best parts of this show. I’m not a gay man so my opinion on this is not that valuable, but as far as I know it was very well received by the gay community. Their relationship was as raw and as realistic as everything else that’s good about this show. How uncommon is it, even now, for media to show that guys like Mickey can be gay? How uncommon is it for them to show a genuine connection between growing up being shaped by an environment like Mickey’s and the way he deals with his sexuality, rather than just creating a character that never took on any part of their upbringing because they were simply too camp to fit in. The way Mickey and Ian both felt about their sexuality very much shaped their relationship at the start of it, but it grew from there. The writers didn’t make the mistake of making the relationship about the fact that it was gay. Neither character was killed off, the relationship was very on-and-off but wasn’t intentionally cut short, and they didn’t shy away from showing on-screen affection while also (in my opinion) not coming off as fetishistic either. Mickey and Ian was everything that is usually done wrong done right, and unfortunately the only real example of that on this show. 

The Kash storyline actually came before Mickey, but I wanted to start this post off with a positive example so I didn’t sound too salty. I have mixed feelings about how realistic this one was, and since I’m not a gay man I really don’t think it’s my place to state whether it was or not. But one thing is for sure; it wasn’t positive. I mean, it’s an affair between a seriously underage Ian (I think he was around 15 in the first season?) and his significantly older, married with children employer. Kash is also middle-eastern so this story fed into both homophobic and racist stereotypes. 

In season 2 Ian sleeps with yet another married man: Ned/Lloyd (Jimmysteve’s father). Lloyd is even older than Kash (likely 50s/60s) while Ian is still underage. Lloyd describes his sexuality as “anything that walks” meaning this isn’t actually bad gay representation, but terrible bi representation. 

Jumping ahead to season 6 (after Ian has been working in a gay club and had many hookups, but no real relationships aside from Mickey so nothing worth mentioning), Ian started dating Caleb, a black firefighter. Caleb turns out to be HIV positive but the show (in my opinion) handles it extremely well, making it a point that it’s possible to manage it with medication to the point where you can’t transmit it to anyone. It was a genuinely great, healthy relationship, until they decided to make Caleb cheat with a woman. Again, terrible bi representation, and once they’ve broken up the experience leads to Ian attempting to have straight sex too. It’s something a lot of gay men go through so I don’t think it was necessarily bad to add it to the show, but I do take issue with that even being needed as a plot device to show that Ian is truly gay, as that’s the way a lot of society views homosexuality too. 

Shortly after this, Trevor is introduced. Like I said, I’m not a gay man so my opinion on all of the former was of limited value, but I am a trans man and dear fucking god I hated Trevor’s story. Trevor is the embodiment of a character whose only defining trait is that they are LGBT. He’s overly sensitive to anyone not being immediately understanding about trans issues, and his relationship with Ian infuriated me. Trevor was offended that Ian lost interest upon finding out that he was trans, and the show made it seem like he was in the right for it. Ian apologised and they end up dating. They end up fucking. All this right after having shown that Ian tried to sleep with the opposite sex and absolutely hated it. Pure virtue signaling and my personal annoyance that every trans person in Trevor’s friend group was shown to be an “SJW snowflake” who had to introduce themselves with their pronouns is worthless next to the genuine harm that was done by showing that gay men can and totally should sleep with the opposite sex as long as they’re trans. 

I don’t even want to move on from that because of how genuinely terrible it is, but let’s do so anyway because there’s more. Further building on the pattern of terrible bi representation, there was the minor season 1/2 character Jasmine. She’s married but unfaithful, and her showing interest in women is seen as a part of her being so “free spirited”, if you can call it that. 

The “throuple” between Kev, Vee and Svetlana is another example. This post is getting long but I mean, for god’s sake can this show have a single bi character that isn’t super promiscuous if not a fucking unicorn? Every bi woman who’s ever used dating apps deserves to be mad at this storyline. 

Now for the thing that actually got me to write this post; the lesbian representation in this show. The first lesbian we see is Bob/Roberta, in season 1 and 2. She’s a literal stereotype as an extremely butch truck driver, dating a woman who is generally presumed to be straight. She and Monica try to take Liam away on the basis that he’s black and needs a black parent. Just like with Kash, this is doubly negative representation. She’s a minor character and all she does is “turn” a character by being so butch, and try to steal a fucking baby. 

In early season 9 this stereotyping stunt is repeated. Debbie meets Alex, another black woman so butch that she’s introduced as someone who’s passing as a man. Alex makes Debbie question her sexuality (though Debbie is later revealed to be bi, she wasn’t at this point so this was still falling into the “straight woman is ‘turned’ by an ultra-butch lesbian” trope) and they move in together right away. When they have lunch together after an argument, Alex spends hours talking about all of her exes, eventually reaching a point where Debbie can’t take it anymore and leaves. 

Also introduced in season 9 is Carl’s girlfriend, Kelly. When this character was introduced it was immediately obvious to me that she was coded to seem like a lesbian. She's the daughter of an army officer and plays softball, and just about everything about the way she looks and acts seemed gay. I initially thought that they made this character date Carl to kill any suspicions of her being a lesbian before they could begin, but then they actually turned “queer baiting” (not my term) into a plotline. They made her character flirt with Debbie, made Debbie try to “steal” her from Carl (again, a bi character not respecting established relationships), and very much hinted at a relationship happening. The preview for season 9 episode 13 showed them kissing, and they still ended that story with her being straight and apologising for accidentally leading Debbie on. 

I’ll throw in an honorable mention to Lea Delaria’s very brief appearance as a character so minor I can’t even remember what it was called; Lip’s potential AA sponsor; another ultra-butch stereotype, and an asshole. Oh and there was the whole gentrification plotline, where a bunch of rich lesbian couples (you guessed it, stereotypes!) moved into the southside. And Ford’s exes that Fiona met when she went bowling, which were barely actual characters and more of a joke about how gay they looked and how Ford clearly had a type. With Kelly being revealed as straight, the closest this show has ever gotten to a lesbian character that took actual part in the plot beyond being a stereotype was the lesbian couple in Fiona’s apartment building, and they still had one of them sleep with a man (off-screen, luckily) as a Totally Necessary Measure to get pregnant. 

Shameless was genuinely one of my favourite shows and it wasn’t too hard to look past most of this at first, considering so many characters are terrible people anyway. But I can’t ignore the flaws at this point. This goes beyond comedy and I’m almost angry that Shameless has ruined itself for me just by being homophobic.

[imagineclaireandjamie]

So I have an idea what if Claire was a 21st century woman and not a 20th century. Then meet Jamie how wpuld that go

A continuation from Part 1.i - envisioning Jamie as a 21st century man too but with his 18th C morals and values thrown in

As Yet Unread: Prologue - Part 1.ii:

With the back of the house now done, and the lounge on the cusp of completion, the weeks began to fly by. Steadily, Murtagh and Jamie ticked off another two rooms until all they had left to work on was the hall. In two and a half months they had successfully replaced and maintained all seven rooms and had even managed to resurrect the smoking room floor without having to fully replace the boards.

Randall had returned, praised them on a job well done and promptly disappeared again on another one of his long business trips.

“Do ye think he’ll be back before we finish the job?” Murtagh asked one day as he swept the dust from the floor before they packed up and left for the day.

“He meant to be,” Claire interrupted, appearing as if from nowhere with a tray of sandwiches. Her visits to them had been regular but between Murtagh’s constant glare and Claire’s newly discovered shyness her and Jamie had adopted a level of formality that allowed them to dampen the closeness they’d developed before. “He sends his apologies, but he doesn’t think he’ll be back much before the end of the month and I assume you’ll be done by then?” She added kindly.

“Gi’ us two more weeks, lassie,” Murtagh said, leaning over to pick an egg and cress butty from Claire’s selection, “and we’ll be done, packed up and out of yer hair. Ye’ll be glad of it; you’ll literally be able to let the dust settle.” He joked whilst munching on his early evening snack.

“Have you got anything lined up for the summer?” Claire asked, making small talk as if she didn’t want them to leave for the night. She seemed more antsy than usual and Jamie had to keep his hands secured in his pockets so as not to stride across the room and pull her against his chest.

“Actually…we do!” Jamie announced proudly. “Glasgow University need a wee restoration jobbie that we’re going to once we’re done here.” Having only received the call for the job at the weekend, Jamie and Murtagh were still riding the high of it and it had given Jamie the boost he needed to drag him out of the minor slump he’d found himself in. At least they wouldn’t be unemployed.

“That’s great news!” Claire said excitedly. “I know how happy Jack has been with your work, you really are extremely talented - to get all of this done in three months to such a high standard, the university would have been silly to hire anyone else. I mean, the craftsmanship you’ve displayed here has been exemplary.”

“It proves that word of mouth is pretty powerful in this city,” Murtagh added, “Wi’ Lord Thomas and Mr Randall as clients, others are really starting to take notice of us. And thank ye, Claire. Yer food and cups of tea have gotten us through many a long day, aye? I think you can take some credit for our speed and finesse.”

Claire blushed madly before covering the remaining sandwiches up with cling film and stepping backwards. “I-I’m sure that’s not true,” she stuttered, placing her hand on the bannister as she placed her foot on the first step, “though I’m glad you’re not at the mercy of the horrors of builders brew.” Shedding her nerves as quickly as she acquired them, Claire smiled at the men as Murtagh picked up the weighty toolbox and handed it to Jamie wordlessly. “See you tomorrow then?” She added, giving them both a short wave before rushing off back upstairs.

“She’s going to miss ye,” Murtagh said as Jamie turned the van towards the main road and home.

The moment the words left his mouth he kicked himself. Since Jamie’s phone call all those weeks ago neither of them had discussed anything in relation to Claire but Murtagh had been delicately (with Suzette’s advice) assessing the situation to make sure that Jamie wasn’t leaning towards anything daft.

Jamie, though, was often a closed book. He didn’t wear his emotions on his sleeve and he was amazingly good at silently working through any emotional hardships he might be experiencing. However, he had learned those tricks from his father, Brian, who had -in turn- learned them from Murtagh -his wise older brother.

“I get the feeling Randall willna be away as much once we’ve decamped. She won’t be alone for long, I’m sure.” Jamie returned nonchalantly.

Murtagh squinted questioningly. “Aye, yer right, of course.” He answered keeping his voice even. He couldn’t be sure whether Jamie was fibbing to deflect his real feelings or simply being honest. Choosing to trust in Jamie, he shrugged off any concern he might have had and plucked another of Claire’s triangle cut sandwiches from his pocket. “On that note, do ye think you’d be able to close down the project alone? Susie wants to take us on a long weekend and the best deal we can get is next Thursday to Monday…”

“Ye trust me for two days on my own?” Jamie quipped, elbowing Murtagh gently.

“If it means I get to take my lady away wi’ our protege, then aye, of course I do.” Murtagh replied snarkily. “It’s only the edging on the hall boards that ye’ll need to neaten. No’ too difficult job for a wean, aye?”

Pulling the car up beside the curb, Jamie put the van into neutral and pulled up the handbrake. “Go and book yer holiday, uncle Murtagh,” Jamie said quietly, giving Murtagh an honest grin as he waited for him to exit the van. “Ye’ve earned the break after the stress of our first big project combined wi’ the madness of the flu.”

As promised the last pieces of the manor’s floor puzzle came together in two weeks. Murtagh helped with the major work, meaning that Jamie only had the final small tasks to smarten up. With his uncle’s absence, Jamie gave himself not only the Thursday and Friday but the Monday as well, just in case he didn’t manage everything that needed doing.

Sliding his hand over the two hundred year old renovated wooden boards of the sitting room to the left of the hall, he placed his head against the floor and looked across its great empty expanse. It was flat and clean, just as it was meant to be and Jamie felt his chest swell with pride at the sight of it. The edging was done, the boards had been sanded and re-varnished where necessary and the whole ground floor looked as good as it would have done had it just been laid.

“Do you take photographs of these jobs, Jamie?” Claire asked, her floral skirt swaying in the breeze that was flowing through the open door as she stood waiting for him to stand.

“Oh fuck!” Jamie cursed, pushing himself up from where he knelt and holding his hand over his mouth. “Aye, I do. But I’ve left the camera back at my flat. What a stupid dolt!” He self-flagellated, his feet tapping at the fresh panels beneath his feet as he searched his pockets for his keys. “I don’t suppose you have one?”

“No, sorry,” Claire apologised, “I’m sure Jack has one, but he usually takes it with him and even if he’d left it, I couldn’t tell you where it might be kept having no use for it myself.”

“Nay bother,” Jamie continued, his ire decreasing now, “there’s enough daylight left. I’ll just have to go home and get it.”

Just as he’d said the words, his brain ignited with an idea that he knew he’d regret but his heart suddenly took control of his mouth and before he could reason with himself, he’d made the suggestion public. “I ken ye dinna leave, Claire, but ye could come wi’ me…if you like? Ye dinna even have to leave the van, I just–”

“Yes,” Claire answered, her eyes alight with eagerness as she interrupted Jamie’s rambling.

Jamie hadn’t expected her to answer in the affirmative and certainly not so fast and his jaw hung open in shock as he nodded and pointed towards the doorway. “Alright then, excellent.” He said finally, taking hold of her hand and rubbing her shaking fingers beneath his own.

Before he could talk himself out of it and before reason returned to him, Jamie led Claire out of the front door and unlocked the van.

Turning to her, he placed his free hand against her chin and kept his eyes level with hers before asking her the only question that was important now. “Are ye certain, Claire?”

Swallowing audibly, Claire nodded, unable to speak to answer the question.

That was all Jamie needed to open the door and help Claire in.

Handing him her keys, Claire twisted her hands in the material of her skirt and she turned so that she could look up at Jamie. “H-here,” she said anxiously, “please, Jamie, lock the front door for me.”

Smiling softly at her, he did as he was bid, leaving her to contemplate her rash decision as he closed up the house. Jamie could see Claire through the windscreen as he returned back to the van, got into the drivers side and started the engine. He waited for a moment, giving her ample opportunity to change her mind should she wish.

Sitting stoically, Claire couldn’t bring herself to think of the consequences - not whilst she was still in Jamie’s company. She hadn’t been able to contemplate what she’d do for conversation once Jamie and Murtagh left for good and all reason had flown out of the window the moment Jamie had asked her to go with him. She was drawn to him and for reasons unbeknownst to her and even after all the years hidden away, Claire was willing to risk it all for one more hour with Jamie.

“Okay then, Claire?” Jamie asked one final time.

“Okay.” She replied.

Pulling out of the drive and onto the main road, Jamie took one easy breath and then another as the miles disappeared, putting Claire’s prison behind them for the time being. He hadn’t wanted to think of her trapped there but as the fresh air swirled around them in the cab of the van it seemed more and more likely that she hadn’t any anxiety issues keeping her indoors -other than those relating to her relationship with Jack Randall.

“Have ye ever seen the city before, Claire?” Jamie asked, breaking the silence that had enveloped them as the roads began to widen in front of them.

Jamie simultaneously wanted to know everything about Claire whilst knowing so little that he didn’t contemplate stealing her away from that place forever.

“No - not that I can actively recall.” She answered, using formality as an attempt to cover up her apprehensiveness. “I’ve lived here since I was about seventeen or so…” she continued, trailing off as she left the rest to Jamie’s imagination. Staring out of the windscreen, Claire basked in the sunshine as it filtered through the glass keeping her warm and cosy. It was beautiful, even as the houses started to take the place of the rolling fields.

Her silence spoke louder than her words and as he drove them into Glasgow, watching surreptitiously as she glanced this way and that, his thoughts turned more sour. She wasn’t uneducated, that much was clear, she knew enough about the world without ever actually seeing any of it that she could probably adapt quickly but that only reminded him of her position.

As he hit the dual carriageway, his speed increasing exponentially as he hit the accelerator, headed towards his home, Jamie saw Claire hunch her shoulders in shock.

“It’s safe, Claire, I promise. It’s the limit, no faster.”

“It’s alright, honestly,” she replied, although he could tell that it wasn’t.

In no time at all, though, Jamie had pulled off the short stretch of fast road that led to his flat and had adopted a more pleasurable speed. Indicating right, he drove the car slowly into the off-road parking facilities and brought the van to a stop.

“Do you want to come up?” He asked calmly, injecting as much ease into his words as possible. She was starting to relax again but he wouldn’t push her. “You dinna have to.”

“No,” she replied, as quickly as she had back at the manor, making choppy decisions so that she didn’t have much time to think at all, “I’d really like that. I’ve come all this way. I’d love to see where you live…if that’s alright with you?”

“O’ course it is! It’s a good job I threw the hoover round the other day, aye?” Jamie joked, jumping out of the van and rushing around to the passenger door to open it for Claire.

“Oh, you don’t need to worry about that,” Claire returned joyfully, “I’m sure it’s just lovely.”

Linking his fingers through hers, Jamie walked Claire across the asphalt and in through the side door of the newly refurbished flats. They didn’t talk as he took out his keys, guided her through the thin corridor and pressed the button for the lift. Ordinarily he would have taken the stairs, but it was a long way to the top and he wanted to watch Claire’s reactions carefully. Climbing four flights of stairs wasn’t conducive with him being able to do that.

“How long have you lived here, Jamie?” She asked,  her voice simply curious now as they entered the lift and Jamie pressed the button for the fourth floor.

“Ach, only about three years if I remember correctly. The whole block was gutted and rebuilt from the inside out to make it more comfortable living. Murtagh did a lot of work here actually, he taught me all he knew from doing it and him and my da then got me a really good deal on a property. Just wait until ye see the view, aye?” He said with a massive grin plastered across his face.” I’m verra lucky.” He added, not just meaning his good fortune on affording an ample living space.

Only a few short steps away from the lift, Jamie opened the door to his apartment and showed Claire down the long hallway. At the end was a bedroom, with a bathroom just before it and to the right, just next to the entrance to the bedroom, was a large lounge. Ushering her through, Jamie gave Claire the whirlwind tour as he opened doors to show her the various rooms.

“…and just at the end there is the kitchen but it’s here in the lounge where the views are best.”

Sliding open the curtains and pulling up the blinds, Jamie showed Claire the view of the park. The spires of the university sat proudly in the distance, the orange glow of sunset lighting up the familiar red brick spires. It was truly awe-inspiring and Claire, in a bid to get as close to the view as possible, stuck her nose against the glass to get a better look.

“It really is beautiful,” she whispered, misting up the glass with her breath as she spoke.

“Aye, it is.” Jamie replied, standing in the doorway and watching quietly. “Can I make ye a cup of tea, Claire?” He asked, wanting to return the favour. “Maybe a cake? I have some bakewell tart or lemon drizzle. Both handmade. My mam and sister make them and then Jenny, my sister, brings them down when she brings her bairns to visit me and Murtagh. It’s good cake!”

His joy was infectious and Claire almost forgot herself entirely. Pulling herself away from the window, she turned and nodded at Jamie, all thoughts of Jack and her previous life evaporating in an instant. “Homemade cake? Yes please. Anything lemon is wonderful. B-but I’ll just have water if that’s alright with you? I’ve never been much of a hot drink fan.”

Jamie gasped theatrically. “No hot drinks, lass? No tea!” He exclaimed with his hand across his heart. “Are ye even British, Claire?”

Sniggering, Claire covered her mouth as she wiped the nervous sweat from her brow unconsciously. “Who knows, maybe I’m just a ghost.”

It was meant as a joke, but it made both of them stop in their tracks. The statement was partially true. Jamie had assumed that she was a legal British citizen, of course, but locked away in that house, rotting behind closed doors, she might as well have been a figment of his imagination, a spectre that haunted the old halls of the Randall residence.

“Water and cake coming up,” Jamie said, breaking the newly formed tension, “take a seat, aye? I’ll bring it over for you.”

Early evening turned into dusk fairly quickly and before Jamie and Claire knew it, it was dark outside. They’d both consumed a slice of cake each and Jamie had relayed more stories of his family. He’d told Claire about each of his siblings, Willie, the eldest, who’d inherited the family farm. Jenny, the next in line, who’d married her high school sweetheart and started her very own family in one of the cottages on the family land and his younger brother, Rabbie, who was just about to take his A-Levels.

“We’re all so different really,” he said nostalgically, “Willie was always the one I looked up to. He was the wise one. Jenny and I would follow him around like his shadow.”

“They all sound wonderful,” Claire said with a sad smile on her face, “it seems like you had a brilliant childhood.”

“It was loud, that’s fer sure.” He added, clutching his cold cup of tea. “It was only when mam had Rabbie that we realised the value of our wee family, to be honest. It was a stressful time. Mam went into labour and wi’ us living so far away she’d always had home births. But wi’ Rabbie she couldna. Weel, she tried, but–”

The sound of the doorbell ringing echoed through the corridor bringing both Jamie and Claire to a complete standstill.

“Odd,” Jamie mumbled, “Murtagh’s away and nobody else has the access code to get up here.”

Claire’s heart stumbled in her chest as her blood ran cold but she stayed sitting on the settee quietly.

“Might be a neighbour, I willna be long, aye?” He said, standing to see who’d come calling.

Jamie’s hands clenched tightly into fists as he opened the door to the infinitely cool figure of Jack Randall. Smiling that cold smile, Jack tipped his head to the side a little - dissecting Jamie where he stood.

“Mr. Fraser,” he began with veiled nicety covering up who knew what, “may I?” He asked, lifting his arm enough to point into the flat.

Nodding, Jamie moved out of the way and followed Randall down the hall and into the lounge.

“I take it you’ve finished the floors?” He asked, looking only at Claire as he spoke. Jamie tracked his gaze, looking between the pair as if to catch any hint that he meant to cause her harm and somehow finding none. Randall seemed collected. He didn’t appear angry or shocked, simply accepting of the situation as he’d found it. “I’ll have my secretary send you images should you wish to add them to your portfolio, is that alright? You don’t need to come back over then - no need to waste more fuel, is there?”

Putting his hands into the back pockets of his jeans, Jamie nodded again, his mouth too dry to speak coherent words. He knew just by looking at Randall that the man had suspected such an outcome but he had nothing to base the assumption on, no verifiable proof, only the look in Randall’s eye as he smiled across at him.

“Excellent. Come, Claire,” he said, indicating with one flick of his index finger.

As if compelled to go by some invisible string, Claire slid to Randall’s side and bit the inside of her lip as he wrapped his arm around her.

It seemed loving enough, but Jamie felt something utterly feral pass between him, Claire and Randall as he bent down to kiss the top of her head lightly. “Time to go home now, say goodbye to Mr. Fraser.”

“Goodbye,” she said so quietly that Jamie had to strain to hear her.

“Take care,” Jamie added, more of a prayer to the universe to keep her safe than as farewell gesture, “and thank ye for yer hospitality.”

“Good luck, Mr. Fraser,” Randall said, turning just enough so that Jamie could see the dangerous look in his eye as he opened the front door, escorting Claire further away from him as he closed the door calmly behind him.

Jamie waited until he heard the familiar ding of the elevator before he ran his shaky hands through his matted hair. Flopping onto his sofa, he rested where Claire had been sat only moments before. Part of him had no clue what had just transpired between him and Jack Randall. On the outside, to a bystander, the conversation seemed pleasant, nothing untoward about the offer of photographs being sent to a carpenter, but underneath that, buried in the context of Randall’s words, Jamie had detected a darker meaning.

Glancing at the phone, it only took him a moment to make the decision. Picking up his landline, he dialled 999 and waited for the options to kick in. “Police, please,” he said as directed by the friendly machine on the other end. As the receiver clicked through to the call centre situated somewhere in Glasgow, Jamie wasted no time in waiting for the operator to introduce themselves.

“I need to report a crime,” he said, standing to pace the length of his lounge now, the nervous energy pouring out of him as he spoke. “Or a crime that is about to take place, aye? Do ye, can ye do that? Report something ye think *might* occur?” He rambled into the void, his heart pounding mercilessly.

The line crackled a little.

“Of course, sir,” the woman replied, clearly now, “can ye tell me what this is in relation to.”

“A woman, a friend, she’s trapped, I think. She’s going to be hurt, I ken it…”

“Can you give me any names, sir?” The call assistant asked, tapping her pen against her pad as she waited patiently for Jamie to talk.

“Och, aye, a Mr Jack Randall, he’s holding a lassie in his house. We were there, I was there, doing a job for the man. She’s never been out, aye? But it isna because she doesna want to. She came out wi’ me, I took her away but he arrived here, took her back to that house of his and now I’m worried that he means to punish her for leaving.”

“…and the name of the lass, sir?”

“Jamie,” he said quietly, his tone sounding much calmer than he felt, “call me Jamie, aye? And it’s Claire. Though I dinna ken her surname. Randall introduced her as his fiancée, but he didna say her surname.”

“There’s no priors for Mr. Randall, sir, in terms of petty crimes or domestic violence. Did Claire say she was being threatened? That she was being kept against her will in the property, s-Jamie?” The operator continued, the tapping of her computer sounding down the line as she spoke.

“No.” Jamie answered, his head falling forward in resignation as he realised that the likelihood of the police investigating his claims were microscopic. “I just….know, aye? I canna explain it. She didna outright say it. But I dinna think she’s safe - especially not now I coaxed her out of the house and he had to come looking for her.”

“Then, I’m sorry sir,” the woman replied apologetically, “there isn’t much we can do. I can note your call and take a number, if you’d like. Just in case. But if you have no actual evidence of a crime -whether it’s been committed or is about to be- then I canna send an officer out.”

“No’ even for a wee keek, to be sure?”

“No, sir. Sorry, sir. It’s just not in our remit to investigate members of the public on a whim…and Mr Randall has a rather large standing in the community. No’ to say he’s above the law, sir, but we canna send our officers around to question a man wi’out some form of proof. Are ye sure she didna say she was in danger, sir?”

“No,” Jamie sighed, regretfully, “she didna.”

“Can I take yer full name, Jamie?” The operator asked kindly, sensing Jamie’s despair, “I’ll make a note on my system about it just in case.”

“Aye, thank ye. It’s Jamie Fraser and ye can call me on 0141-2002893 if ye need any more information.”

“Thank you Mr. Fraser, goodnight.”

Placing his phone back in the cradle, Jamie closed his eyes and fell against the wall that stood between his bedroom and the lounge. He felt the fight flow from him as his head hit the plaster over and over again. Feeling useless and helpless he thought back to his final moments with Claire, the subdued fear that lay behind her irises as she’d smiled softly at Jack and obeyed his orders.

Jamie hadn’t even offered for her to stay, he’d just let her leave.

Regret coated his tongue as he slammed his fist once against the wall and then stomped into the bathroom to brush his teeth.

“Why,” he muttered to himself angrily, “why didn’t I ask her no’ to leave…”

The week between finishing the old job and starting the new one at the university passed slowly. Jamie received a package with a number of photographs of the floor at Randall’s place along with a pen drive and a small typographically perfect note that only read: ‘For the attention of Mr. J. Fraser.’

Murtagh smiled from ear to ear as he flipped through the photos, his eyes alight with glee as he saw the high quality finish in print for the first time.

Jamie hadn’t breathed a word of his escapades to Murtagh. He hadn’t heard anymore from the police and, although he was desperate to share the burden with someone, he didn’t want Murtagh to worry - either about him or Claire. For now it was his problem. All he could do now was hope that she was safe.

“Did ye hear me, Jamie?” Murtagh asked, slapping Jamie on the arm with the empty brown envelope. “I said; aren’t they good?”

“Yes, sorry Murtagh,” Jamie replied, stirring his mid-morning coffee slowly. “Definitely a grand addition to our portfolio.”

The dull buzz of Jamie’s phone made him jump and he stood, pushing by Murtagh whose mouth was open - poised to ask Jamie what on earth was making him so miserable when the irritating ringing curtailed him.

“Hello, Jamie Fraser of Fraser’s Fixings, how can I help ye?”

“Mr Fraser?” The stern voice asked slowly. “Ye made a report about a week ago and left your number with one of our hotline staff?”

“Aye,” Jamie replied, his heart leaping into his throat, “I did, what of it?”

Crossing himself, he prayed Claire safe again, his palms sweating at the mere thought of her coming to harm because of his actions.

“There’s been a development. A Claire Beauchamp has been admitted to Glasgow A&E, Mr. Fraser. We need you to come and make a statement, if you wouldn’t mind…”

“How is she?” Jamie interrupted, sweat sliding down his spine as he tried his best to stay upright.

“Claire is in intensive care, Mr. Fraser. As of now it’s quite serious,” the officer on the end of the line confirmed, his tone sorrowful and low as he spoke soothingly to Jamie, “she’s critical, I’m afraid.”

[deeeelightfuldee]

surveyss 013.

Are you mad at your best friend right now? I guess it depends who that is. I’m not mad at em. I have to get out of the habit of calling Kile my best friend, but he has been my other half for so long. I’m not mad at him.. I just.. I guess I am just so sad wishing he wanted me the way I thought he did.

Do you know anybody with a pet snake? Ugh. Gross yes. I am not close with these kinds of people.

Do you buy your underwear in a pack or seperately? Either way. In a pack is convenient and cheaper, but seldom allows for cute undies. Buying individually is proving to be great for style, but expensive.

Have you ever made fun of anybody and later became their friend? I never really made fun of Nathan, I just would smack him with a plastic baseball bat.

Is the lamp on in the room you're in? Right now only this new little egg shaped lamp that is trying to die.

Do you have a pair of shoes that you can only wear with one or two outfits? Uhhh, maybe like ... no. Actually no, I think most of my shoes are interchangeable. 

Is there any drink that you absolutely MUST drink cold? I genuinely prefer my drinks cold. I think the only warm drinks I like are hot chocolate or tea.

Did you sleep in past noon today? Woof, no. 

Did your grandma ever tell you about her love life? I have never had a personal conversation with my paternal grandmother, and no longer have an opportunity since she was killed. My maternal grandmother has shared very little because she seems to think being private is like a badge of honor. She was in love once in college, but her parents ruined it and he let go and moved on. She never did. She ended up “settling” for my grandpa -- who was an awesome guy. She just wasn’t really in love, she did it because that’s who her parents wanted.

Have you ever painted anybody's nails aside from your own? Yes.

Anything exciting happening in the month of September? It’s my mom’s birthday which should be a national holiday. I can’t afford to spoil her, but hopefully I’ll be able to make it fun somehow.

Who is your last missed call from? I think my sister. I wish I had calls from Kile. It’s good I don’t, cus I would be tempted to answer. But it would be so good to hear his voice on voicemail. Sigh.

When was the last time you ate Frosted Flakes? Oh boy, it’s been a hot minute.

Did you ever NOT want a substitute in a certain class? I was homeschooled. There were no substitutes.

Do you ever donate to the less fortunate? Yes

Did you buy an American flag after 9/11 to put on your car/house/ whatever? Did I personally? No, I had no money. But my family did buy a lot.

Do you know any songs that are older than you are? Heck yeah.

Are there framed pictures of you anywhere in your house? Yes. We have like a large gallery wall with a photo of myself. We also framed some graduation photos. 

Compared to other people of your age would you be considered 'NORMAL'? What is normal.

Honestly, do you have any Hilary Duff on your MP3 player? I don’t use an MP3 player anymore. I have plenty of Duff on my spotify lol

Who is worst in your family about calling people back? MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

Do you like peanut M&M's? I do, but now I’m madly in love with regular m&m’s. Kile used to send me peanut ones I had so many I could have filled a bathtub with them hahaha.

When was the last time you had an ice cream sandwich? It’s been a very, very long time.

When was the last time you ate jelly beans? Yuck. Not that long ago we had some for David. I’m not a fan.

When was the last time you had hot chocolate? Around Christmas time.

Have you ever caught a friend cheating on their bf/gf? In a way. Not someone I’m close to.

What was the last song stuck in your head? I almost always have My Country Tis Of Thee stuck in my head. It literally happens all the time and I have no idea why. Mom thinks it is hilarious and also semi concerning.

Do you enjoy doing math? Not even a little.

Do you think your mom has secrets she’s never told you? Yeah probably. Not many, but I would imagine some.

Do you own anything you don’t want your parents to know about? Probably.

Do you pose in your pictures or just smile? Both. Just depends what strikes my fancy.

Are there any colors you will NOT wear? Pale creamy colors do not do justice to me. 

Do you use scented soap in the shower? Always scented something.

Did you ever want to be a fashion designer? Nooooope

Who was the last person you danced with? Enjoyable? Hahaha. I mean I danced last night with the kids. the last time I danced with a male, it was enjoyable.

Do you like convertibles? I do, my sister once rented one for a weekend when I came into town just so we could drive around and be spoiled. It was so awesome. 

Have you ever yelled at the television? Definitely. I just did for this murder story I’m watching.

How many songs on your MP3 player are about sex? On spotify I have plenty, not gonna lie.

Do you like water parks? I love them in theory, but I am repulsed by them in all honesty.

Dark or light colored jeans? Depends on the fit. 

Can you take apart a computer and name all the parts? Heckie no.

Can you take apart a car and name all the parts? I’d probably have more luck with this than the computer, but still no.

Would your friends describe you as nerdy? Yes, yes they would.

How many different colors are you wearing right now? four. White/blue, blue, black, mauve. 

Have you ever purchased a lotto ticket? I sure have

Are you double-jointed anywhere? Nooope.

What is the longest amount of time you've spent playing Monopoly? Probably like 4 hours. Though, it should be stated that I don’t think I’ve ever played with anyone who genuinely wanted to play the correct way. I would love to try.

Have you ever witnessed a tornado first-hand? Yes but it didn’t look like the stereotypical tornado. I want to see one. It’s wild how things change... back in the day tornadoes were my greatest fear. Crippling fear. No longer that way.

Did you play in the sand box as a kid? I didn’t dislike it. I just didn’t do it all that often. There weren’t any at the parks near me as a child, and my dad would have lost his mind at the mess.

How about on the monkey bars? I always tried and was often OK at it. I just disliked how hot the bar could get or when my hands would slip.

Have you ever made an alarm go off? Oh I sure have.

Have you ever colored your eyebrows? Yup. Naturally, my eyebrows are MEGA white blonde.

Did you ever own a pop-up book? Uhhh Probably one or two as a kid.

Have you ever honked at a biker? I don’t think so?

Have you ever taken another person's prescribed medication? A muscle relaxer once that my mom gave me that she didn’t need.

Have you ever played golf (not miniature golf)? I’ve gone one time to a like.. driving range type thing? Never gone official golfing. I’d like to.

Do you use gel in your hair? Maybe 1-5x a year.

Do you own a garden gnome? Definitely not.

Are any of the rooms in your house painted blue? Yes

Do you kick off your shoes as soon as you walk in the door? Typically yes I do, but sometimes we leave them on. Gram has to wear them for stability, mom wears them to protect her feet from cuts, and so I will sometimes.

Have you ever judged a book by its cover? Yes

What is the most effective device at the gym? I couldn’t tell ya. I’m intimidated by the gym.

Can you drive a stick shift? At one point yes I could! I am positive I wouldn’t remember how to now.

Have you ever picked on a substitute teacher? Never had a sub and I would never

How good are you at giving directions? OOOOOOOOOOOOOooo I’m terrible at it. I’m great at doing it in the car, but don’t call me and expect me to be able to tell you directions like “go northeast for 1.2 miles” heck no.

When was the last time you looked out the window nearest you? Probably a half hour ago or so. I checked on the water filling the pool.

Have you ever got dressed with the windows open? Yes. Often I will. Not in the summer though, because I try to keep my room as dark and cool as possible.

Have you ever given a foot massage? yes

Do public restrooms freak you out? It depends on where the bathroom is. Some of them are cleaner than others. I don’t like FREAK out about it, but I don’t enjoy it. I often can wait til I’m home.

Have you ever taken a shower outside? yeah, but I don’t love that.

Have you ever been to a junkyard? I have.

What do you think of Brad Pitt? I don’t really have a big opinion on him.

Have you ever watched the History Channel willingly? Yes, if it interests me.

Have you ever used pennies to pay for something that cost over 50 cents? Hahahaha for my siblings, yes. 

If a place makes you pay for delivery - do you still tip the driver? Yes.

Without the aid of a cell phone - do you know your parents numbers by heart? Yeah. 

Can you name 10 former presidents? Trump, obama, bush, bush, reagan, clinton, nixon, roosevelt, jefferson, washington.

Have you ever bought a gift for a teacher? Yes

Is your bedroom carpeted? Not since I was a child. I do have a rug down.

Right now, what color is your tongue? Pink.

When was the last time you had a Tootsie Pop? Last year probably.

If you could get the cell phone of your choice - what would it be? I have the phone I love. I have to give it up soon, but I’m dreading that.

Who is your favorite super hero? Uhhhhhhhhhh, I’m not sure. Either batman or superman I guess. I would probably have a clear idea if I watched all the superhero movies.

How about your favorite villain? I dunno, still would need to see the videos.

Do you know anybody who works at a bank? I doooooo.

What do you usually order from your favorite fast food place? Right now my favorite fast food place is Buona Beef. I love their char-grilled avocado pepper jack chicken sandwich on gluten free pita with extra jalapeno. OMG. so good.

Do you hand out candy to kids on Halloween? Yup. I dooooooooo. 

What perfume/cologne do you wear the most? My favorite is refuge by charlotte russe. 

Can you name all 7 dwarfs? uhhhh, sleepy, dopey, grumpy, ... no. lolol

Does the early bird really catch the worm? In my world, I totally believe this.