#and five additional minutes to cry on the floor from desperation are always in my schedule | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

griffintail · 4 years

Text

A Day in the Life (Lost Ones)

Summary: A day with the new parents and how some of their friends reaction to their new bit of joy.

Pairings: Platonic! Parental! Tommy, Wilbur, Philza, Technoblade, Eret, and Dream x F! Child! Reader

Previous | Next

Warnings : (In Phil’s Specifically) Death, Violence. (Generally) Swearing

A/N: Just so you know (F/L) means First Letter of your first name. Hope you guys enjoy! ♥

Tommy

Tommy didn’t know what the fuck he was doing.

Tubbo was even more clueless.

When Tommy first came onto Tubbo’s doorstep frantically talking about being a father with a crying baby, Tubbo was in a state of great concern for his best friend. Tubbo knew Tommy as a scammer and a very…bold individual, to put it nicely. He did not think his friend had what it took to be any sort of fatherly figure. He was just too young and he was too…outgoing.

The first day, the pair worked hard to figure out how to make the infant stop crying. They found out she just needed food and a diaper change. Tommy had groaned in relief, sitting on Tubbo’s floor as he held the baby feeding her the milk. From there, Tubbo questioned where he even found a child.

“She was abandoned in a basket, in a tree. I decided to be a big man about it and take her in.”

“Are you crazy? Tommy, you didn’t even know her gender until two minutes ago.”

“Shut up.” Tommy huffed looking at his friend as he stopped giving (Y/N) milk for the moment. “I can figure it out, I’m still new to this Tubbo.”

“I think maybe we should give her to one of the other guys. We don’t know what to do, we just ran around my house for five minutes trying to make her stop crying for god’s sake.”

“I’ll figure it out! Even without your help.” Tommy looked back down at the infant, continuing to feed her.

So, Tubbo went along with it. Tommy was stubborn and to make sure the baby didn’t get hurt, Tubbo said he’d help his friend. To be fair, they didn’t have to do much, it was just a lot of work to do the few things and barely any time to do the same adventures they use to do.

Tommy was determined to do most of it on his own, only going to Tubbo when he was desperate for help. Which were a few times a week. He got better and better though, learning what (Y/N) needed and when.

Tommy had managed to make a crib all on his own (with a couple of tries) and he discovered, (Y/N) liked her crib at the end of his bed. She just liked being close to Tommy often and he actually didn’t mind. He was proud to show off his baby.

When he had shown her off to the others, they had all been in various bits of shock. Of course, when he first introduced her, the first thing he shouted was always;

“I’m a father now bitch! Meet (Y/N)!”

As he would, (Y/N) would giggle and babble, his excited energy rubbing off on her. After their various bits of shock (and Bad telling him to watch his language even more now that there was a baby), they would indeed think (Y/N) was cute but give him the same advice as Tubbo. Give her to an adult.

“None of them! None of them think I can take care of you.” Tommy huffed as (Y/N) finished her milk for the hour. “Isn’t that ridiculous?”

Tommy did struggle often. He didn’t get as much sleep as he once did, he stayed inside with (Y/N) more. It was a big change, but he was taking it seriously despite all his jokes. Just, no one could see it because they only saw Tommy as a child.

“Well, they’re all idiots. I know I have this.” Tommy told the infant as he sat back in bed, holding her. “Right Little (F/L)?”

(Y/N) squirmed slightly, babbling and Tommy smiled.

“Right! It’s that time.” He grinned as he stood up, going into his chests next to his jukebox.

As he pulled out one of his discs, Tubbo knocked on the door as he came in.

“Hey, am I interrupting?” He asked.

“No, you’re actually in time Big T!” Tommy said as he put the red labeled disc on.

“For what?” Tubbo questioned confused as Tommy sat down.

The music started to play and (Y/N) relaxed in Tommy’s arms. Tommy smiled softly, gently rocking her in his arms as he hummed along to the music. Tubbo was staring in amazement from behind Tommy’s seat.

“Do you…do you do this often?”

“Of course.” Tommy grinned at his best friend. “She’s got to learn great music. And look, she loves it so much she falls asleep.”

He was correct as when Tubbo looked, (Y/N) was giving a tiny yawn as she nuzzled into Tommy.

“Every day after lunch, I play the disc I got when I found her and she takes a nap.” Tommy quieted down; startling Tubbo as Tommy never quieted down. “I want to find more to let her hear more.”

Tommy put her down in her crib once she was fully asleep, motioning to the door. They both left as the music kept playing.

“We should go get more discs tomorrow.” Tommy declared, keeping his voice level as he went through his chests. “(Y/N) needs to hear them all and I want to have them all.”

“You…do that every day?” Tubbo said, still caught up on Tommy’s gentleness.

Tommy rolled his eyes. “Of course, I do. (Y/N) likes it and I like it so that’s our routine Tubbo. Sometimes it takes a while though and I have to move around the room.”

He didn’t mention that he danced to the music with her though, laughing with her as she would giggle, slightly embarrassed about the cute routine.

“So, are we going to go out tomorrow and get some discs or not?” Tommy grinned at his friend.

Tubbo stood there, thinking over what he had just seen. He thought about how he was actually wrong about Tommy. His best friend really cared about the girl; his own little girl. Tommy had acted drastically different than what he usually did to make sure she was well and happy. The taller boy was actually taking this very seriously and Tubbo couldn’t help but be proud of his friend.

“Tubbo.” Tommy snapped his fingers, looking at him disapprovingly.

“Oh, yeah. Let’s get some discs tomorrow. It’s been forever since we’ve gone on an adventure.” Tubbo smiled.

He thought Tommy could do this whole dad thing right.

…

Then he slightly regretted his words in the morning when Tommy showed up with the little girl and his adventuring gear.

“We are not taking (Y/N). It’s dangerous Tommy!” Tubbo protested.

“Nothing will happen to her; I wouldn’t let it. Neither would you. And try and say no to this face.” Tommy showed her off, grinning. “Come on now Uncle Tubbo.”

Tubbo paused, getting slightly giddy. “Uncle Tubbo?”

“Of course! Now! Let’s go get some discs!” Tommy took lead.

“…Wait! You distracted me!” Tubbo called exasperated as he followed his best friend.

(Y/N) giggled as Tommy grinned wider. Tommy was stubborn but in the case of being a father, it was a good thing as it meant his baby would grow up healthy and happy and he could care less about what others would say.

Wilbur

L’Manberg didn’t have many secrets but it had one well-guarded one. That would be the simple fact that (Y/N) existed.

After the first night with the new baby, Wilbur had gathered all the men inside the van.

“Time to greet the people little one.” He smiled as he heard the commotion of Tommy trying to command the others.

Coming out, he put on a serious face as everyone went quiet. Of course, Eret and Fundy already knew. The teenager had his arms crossed, looking away from his father and new sister, as Eret gave a small smile. The other two of L’Manberg…

“Did you fuck another fish?!” Tommy shouted in exasperation to his brother.

Fundy gave Tommy an offended glare as (Y/N) squirmed at the sudden loud noise.

“Tommy, quiet down now,” Wilbur told him as he gently rocked the little girl, Tubbo awing at how adorable she was. “Eret found her left outside the walls last night. I’m taking her in as she was obviously abandoned. So, meet the first woman of L’Manberg, (Y/N).”

“(Y/N) is a wonderful name.” Eret smiled a bit wider.

“She’s so cute and small,” Tubbo said, taking a step closer to get a better look at her.

Tommy huffed, already bored as Fundy simply stayed quiet.

“That being said, we are in the middle of a war.”

The weight of everything came back to rest on their shoulders as everyone with a smile stopped holding one. It was a dangerous time for all of them, no one able to leave the walls without a friend. Walls that were supposed to mean their freedom.

“That’s why no one must know (Y/N) exists. She must be a secret from all of the Dream SMP. They’ve shown how ruthless they can be and I don’t want to think about what they’d do if they knew about her. So, beyond these walls, (Y/N) doesn’t exist.”

Everyone gave a nod at the same time as (Y/N) had started to play with the ruffles on Wilbur’s uniform. He smiled gently as her as he took her hand, letting her play with his finger instead before looking dead serious at his men again.

“I can’t have just a nod. I need you to be verbal. This will not be taken lightly.”

Tommy spoke first as he gave a salute. “You have my word, Wilbur!”

Wilbur cracked a small smile; he could always rely on his little brother. “Good, now quiet down a bit.”

From there, it was a chorus of promises and she was their biggest secret that united them. Not even a traitor would dare breath word of her place in their walls.

The men could see a difference in their leader every day since then.

He left the van more often, actually going to his own home in the walls. Daily, everyone would see him carrying (Y/N) with him in her own little uniform he made on a walk within the walls. He sang more often like he used to before the declaration of war was made in order to soothe the little girl or simply to make her smile. There was a reason for him to relax and be soft and everyone was rather glad after all the weight he had been forced to hold.

Wilbur also saw the change in his men as the days went on.

Tubbo found joy with such an adorable new addition. He would sometimes join Wilbur on his daily walks within the walls to have a chance to hold the small girl. The young boy loved to also give her little gifts, usually toys he thought she’d like. He was very excited when Wilbur told him that she slept with a bee plushie he had gotten her.

Tommy was curious about her. Such a small thing, he was certain he was way bigger than her when he was that young. Wilbur let him hold her on the occasion if Tommy asked, but wouldn’t wonder if Tommy was holding her. He had faith in his little brother, but his eccentric energy just put Wilbur a little on edge. Often, Tommy would brag to the little girl that he’d be the coolest uncle and teach her many swear words when she got older, much to Wilbur’s dismay.

Eret did like the little girl, he really did as she was such a precious little thing, but he tried not to put too much attachment to her. He had begun…he had begun a different path and he didn’t want to also betray the little girl. And, the more separation he felt from her, the easier it was to lie about her existence. Though, there was the occasion he would do the same as Tubbo and gave her a toy or two, unable to help it as it put a smile on his face.

Fundy was different. He had been an only child for most of his life and now he had a little sister? It was only natural that he was jealous and sulked at all the attention she got from their father. Their father did try to include Fundy though; inviting every day on their walks, offering to let her feed instead, asking to play his piano while Wilbur sang. Unfortunately, Fundy wanted nothing to do with his little sister, often saying he hated her, which repeatedly broke Wilbur’s heart but he had faith; he’d change his son’s mind.

“I’m trying to have a peace talk with Dream today,” Wilbur told Fundy as he shrugged on his jacket while Fundy was sitting in the front seat of the van.

“Ok, and?” Fundy looked up at him.

“I’m taking Tubbo and Eret, Tommy’s staying guard and you.” Wilbur handed him a piece of paper. “And you are taking care of your sister.”

“What?! What the hell?” Fundy exclaimed, jumping up.

Wilbur put the paper in Fundy’s hand. “I have to go and try and make peace. I have faith in you son. (Y/N) would love to spend time with you anyways. Take good care of her alright? I don’t trust Tommy to watch her for so long but if you really need help, get him.”

“What…Why do I have to watch the brat?”

Wilbur gave him a stern look. “Fundy, she is your little sister. She is a part of our family. And family takes care of each other. Now, I want you to be nice to her and take care of her. Understood?”

Fundy clenched his jaw, shoving his hands in pockets. “Yeah, yeah.”

“Good.” Wilbur smiled at him now. “She’s still sleeping in my room. That paper is what she needs and when. You can do anything with her in-between. I’ll see you in a few hours my son.”

Wilbur left; his heart heavy as this was the first time he’d leave (Y/N) alone but hope helping it float as he hoped Fundy could love his sister as Wilbur loved her.

Fundy went into his father’s bedroom and saw the little girl already waking up slightly. He gave a heavy sigh as he picked her up carefully, holding her close.

“I hate you.” He muttered as she looked up at him.

The little girl giggled and he lowered his head. She gave pet to his face to feel the soft fur.

“I hate you’re too fucking adorable to hate.” He huffed. “Just don’t tell dad. Now, come on dipshit, time to eat.”

Fundy was jealous, yes. But he could never actually hate his adorable little sister. He’d keep her safe and make her happy too.

Wilbur got back later than he expected as Dream and his goons had chased their peaceful band like sport but they managed out relatively unscathed. The moon was already up and Wilbur was worried as he hadn’t written instructions for this long in the night for Fundy. After Tommy reported no incidents along the walls, Wilbur rushed home but froze, his heart-melting. In the living room, there was a long finished playing record on the jukebox and on the couch, Fundy laid with his arm over (Y/N) securely as she laid on his chest, both of them asleep.

“Thank you, my little champion,” Wilbur muttered with a smile, gently picking (Y/N) up before putting a blanket over Fundy. “I’m proud of you.”

Wilbur held (Y/N) close to him as he walked to his bedroom.

“And you, my little star, a day won’t go by where you won’t be loved. You’re our little star of hope in L’Manberg. You remind everyone what we fight for and you bring everyone smiles. We will bring peace, just so you can see how bright you shine my little star.” He kissed her forehead before putting her in her crib. “Sleep well love.”

Philza

Walking took longer than flying but it was definitely safer for his new little angel. He had tried to find her parents, asking around with the survivors but they weren’t there. So, Phil took her with him to meet his sons. When he started this journey, of the list of things he’d thought would happen, he didn’t think he’d gain a new child. Yet, there she slept peacefully in the sash Phil had made to carry her and keep her warm rather than carrying her in his arms the entire walk.

She most certainly quieter than most of his other children had been when they were this small, which Phil did not mind one bit. When she was awake, he would talk to her to fill her world though. He’d tell her about her new brothers and how he was sure they’d all love her in their own way.

“Techno will take a little convincing, he has a thing about orphans.” Phil scrunched up his nose. “But he’ll learn to you like you (Y/N).”

He hadn’t been able to find a name either for the new baby so he gave her one on his own.

Finally, after days of travel, Phil reached a crest of a hill and was able to see a beautiful town laid before him. From the looks of some decorations, they had some sort of festival recently. The worrying part was the people in armor down below, but, a large portion of them were celebrating. Phil scanned them over then he grew a large smile. Wilbur was patting Tommy’s shoulder as the younger boy was screaming with one of those celebrating, Techno to the side smirking.

His sons had managed to figure it all out.

“Looks like we were a little late angel. Your brothers can be smart when they choose to be.” He chuckled. “We’ll wait here and let them have their moment of victory.”

He sat on the edge of the hill, giving (Y/N) her afternoon milk as he watched the crowd below and listened to the start of celebratory speeches. As he quickly burped the infant, he frowned as Wilbur left his seat in the crowd, walking away as Tubbo was getting on stage.

“Let’s go see what he’s up to.” He muttered to the little girl, putting her in his sash securely before carefully flying over.

He landed as Wilbur walked into a room in a hill behind the stage. His eyes went wide as he remembered one of Tommy’s letters.

Will keeps saying if he can’t have L’Manberg, no one can. He made a room rigged to TNT under our nation. I’m hoping to talk him down but I don’t know if I can.

“Shit.” Phil sprinted over, walking into the room after his son.

Inside were mad scribblings as Wilbur stood with his hand on the wall next to a button.

“What are you doing?” Phil asked him.

Wilbur jumped, whirling around to see his father standing there, wearing a sash, unable to see the child it was holding.

“Phil…?”

“What are you doing?” Phil repeated.

Wilbur ran his hands through his hair as he looked back at the button then his father.

“How’d you…do you know what this is?” He motioned to the room around him.

“I do.” Phil nodded, stepping carefully forward.

“Have heard the songs on the walls?” Wilbur asked in turn as he ran his hand over a few of the words. “I was just saying to myself, there was a special place where men can go, but there’s not anymore! It’s not…” Wilbur sighed as he looked back at the button.

“It is there,” Phil told him as he put a hand on the side of the child to calm her down as she squirmed. “You just, you’ve just won it back.”

“Phil! I’m always so close to pressing this button, Phil! I’ve been—I’ve been here like seven or eight times I’ve been here.” Wilbur threw up his arms as Phil stood his ground when he saw the crazed look in his son’s eyes.

The little girl tried to give an uncomfortable babble at the loud shouting but Wilbur talked over her, having yet to notice the extra body in the room. In comfort, Phil put a hand over one of her ears as he pressed her close to him.

“Phil I-I’ve been here so many times.” Outside of the room, they all could hear the sound of fireworks going off. “They’re fighting. They’re fighting.”

“And you want to just blow it all up?” Phil questioned.

“I do I think I—”

“You fought so hard to get this land back.” Phil tried to discourage one of his older sons. “So hard.”

“I don’t even, I don’t even know if works anymore Phil,” Wilbur said, his hand hovering over the button, making Phil take a step forward. “I don’t even know if the button works I could, I could press it and might not…”

Wilbur looked back, grinning like a mad man and Phil squeezed the young girl lightly.

“Do you really want to take that risk? Wilbur…” He went to continue to say, hoping to bring up his new little sister to discourage the man but Wilbur looked away, staring at the button.

“There was a saying Phil, by a traitor. It was never meant to be.” Wilbur pressed the button, grinning at Phil as the hiss went off.

“No!” Phil shouted, quickly pulling his son close as he covered the three of them his wings as the blast went off.

He winced as the blast and the heat singed and damaged his feathers but he didn’t move as he held his two children close. He wouldn’t let them get harmed.

The sound of white noise rang in their ears as the explosions slowly stopped. Phil raised his wings slightly to look in horror at the destruction before them. Outside their half-destroyed room, Phil slowly started to hear the voices crying with terror at what they just witnessed as Wilbur stood before the hole holding his arms out as he grinned.

“My L’Manberg Phil! My unfinished symphony forever unfinished! If I can’t have this no one can Phil!”

“Oh my god.” Phil breathed, the ringing dying down enough for him to be startled at the cries closest to him.

(Y/N) screamed out cries in the aftermath of the loud explosions and shouting, her own ears ringing. Phil held her close, trying to calm her down despite his horror and disappointment. Wilbur finally heard the cries himself and looked over to finally notice the little girl. For a moment, he could see through his madness.

“Who’s…who’s this?” Wilbur muttered.

“She’s (Y/N),” Phil told him as he put his forehead on the little girl’s. “I came to help you and found her. I brought her to show her what her new brothers made. What great work you’ve done.”

“What great…” Wilbur looked over at what he had done.

Behind him, he could hear the cries of his new tiny sister he hadn’t been aware he had. Phil had brought her to show her a place of peace and beauty, but instead, Wilbur showed her terror and destruction. Across the explosion, he could see Tommy’s horror-struck face at the sight of their once great nation gone. This was his fault…

He pulled his sword, holding the handle to Will. “Kill me, Phil.”

“What?!” Phil looked at his son shocked, still clutching onto the crying girl.

“Stab me with the sword. Murder me now. Kill me!” Will demanded as he motioned to the crowd. “Look, they all want you to!”

Phil was stood in shock as he held a crying child in one arm while looking over at the crowd of terrified and horror-filled faces.

“Kill me, Phil!” Wilbur shouted.

“I—You’re my son!” Phil yelled. “No matter what you do—I can’t—”

“Phil!” Wilbur shouted, shoving the sword handle into his hand. “This isn’t—! Look! Look! How much work went into this and it’s gone! Do it.”

Phil looked from his son to the crowd, to the child in his arms. He couldn’t…why’d…(Y/N) should get a chance to meet her own brother! L’Manberg had ruined his son. He had gone mad…

“I’m sorry.” He whispered under his breath before plunging the sword.

Tears filled Phil’s eyes as he let go of the sword and held his son. (Y/N)’s wails only got louder and Phil cried with her.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry both of you.” He muttered

He wished everything could be different…

…

Phil sat by the fire with the L’Manberg citizens, one of his hands shaking slightly as the other gently rocked the no longer crying child.

Tommy had been speechless since the betrayal he received from both of his brothers, but looking up at his father across from him, he stood and spoke.

“Who’s she?” He asked.

Phil looked at him as the others looked over as well.

“This is your new little sister (Y/N). I found her when the village I was staying at was raided and I saved her. Would you like to hold her?”

Tommy came over and sat in front of his father. Phil helped him before letting his now second youngest hold her on his own. Tommy’s face had held no emotion after everything today but now it softened as the little girl met his eyes. He hugged her lightly as Phil held onto his shaking hand with his other to stop it.

“I wish you could have seen what L’Manberg looked like (Y/N),” Tommy mumbled to her. “Wilbur and Techno betrayed me but I promise. I won’t betray you. I never will do that to you.”

Phil looked at his son sadly as Tommy put his forehead on hers softly. At least Phil knew that she’d be well-loved by the brother she got to meet properly.

From there, the next few days were made for rebuilding. Phil helped the group as best he could but he had to rest to let his wings heal and he also had to take care of his little angel. Tommy made sure the others built Phil one of the first houses so his sister could be in a proper bed.

It warmed Phil’s heart that Tommy cared so much about his new little sister. Tommy would visit the pair occasionally just to see her, Phil giving him a little bit of trust to take care of her. Of course, Tommy used that trust to be his usual self and brag about how cute his little sister was to anyone that would listen to the boy’s antics. Though many couldn’t deny the boy, she was a very cute little girl and often brought smiles to other’s faces.

Phil was glad that his quiet little girl could bring joy to people that had been through so much. He just wished that she had had a chance to bring smiles to those that didn’t walk beside them any more…

Technoblade

“Phil,” Techno called on his walkie, trying to quiet down the girl crying in his arms.

“Yes?” Phil answered.

“She won’t stop crying,” Techno told him, Phil, able to hear the girl, chuckling quietly to himself. “Don’t laugh at this!”

“Sorry, sorry. Alright, you feed and changed her right?” The older man listed.

“Yes.” He had done it a few minutes ago, on his usual schedule to do so.

“Did you burp her after she ate?”

Techno paused and huffed before burping the child, the cries dying down after she released the gas that had built up.

“I forgot, she stopped.”

“Good. Just relax now, alright Techno?”

“Yeah.” Techno sighed as he put his walkie away, looking down at the little girl. “What now brat?”

It was often that Techno called his father to ask what to do. To put it simply, he was worried he’d fuck this all up. He had never exactly taken care of a child before; it had been all anarchy and blood before he decided on retirement. Hell, he barely ever took care of Tommy when he was a child, that was usually Wilbur’s thing.

He didn’t know the first thing he was doing nor did the voices. They always threw out different ideas contradicting each other. So, Techno always did his best and when it didn’t seem like enough, he went immediately to Phil.

When he did have things under control though, it was just any other day. Brew some potions out of habit, take care of the animals before collecting food for himself and milk for (Y/N), and trade with some of the villagers close by. The only difference was that he brought (Y/N) with him while he did anything.

To his relief, she was a quiet child and didn’t mind his quiet nature. She didn’t need pointless noise to be happy so he could just simply work. Techno did get Phil to make her a warmer outfit and Phil took it seriously but also made it a joke. He made her a pink outfit from wool and leather and with a bit extra, put fake pig ears on the hood of the outfit, which Techno would never admit looked adorable on her out loud.

He most certainly didn’t put it on her even if they weren’t going out that day, why would anyone think that?

Phil most certainly did spoil her though when he would come over. He’d always have something new for the little girl, clothes, and toys. His father also often tried to discourage Techno from using some of his nicknames for his child when the older man was over, such as brat.

(Y/N) yawned quietly and Techno chuckled, a small smile cracking on his face.

“Tired early huh? Yeah, ok, I can use a nap.” He nodded as he went up to his bedroom.

He sat on his bed, leaning back on the headboard as he racked his brain for their daily ritual.

“I got a good one today.” He laughed quietly. “Let me tell you about the story of Theseus.”

Every nap and bedtime, there was always a story for Techno to tell. Sometimes he’d tell her about his adventures around the world, about the places he conquered. There were other days when he’d tell her about myths he had memorized. It was when he’d talk the most to the little girl and he rather enjoyed these moments in his day.

It was their special little thing and he wouldn’t ever want to miss them.

Close to the end of the story, he stopped as he noticed (Y/N) was asleep. He nodded as he laid back, resting her carefully on his chest.

A crib was one thing Techno had not invested his time in. He didn’t move in his sleep and it was rare for the little girl to move in hers. So, he slept with her on his chest, giving him and the voices a better piece of mind. No one knew where he was, but he was still paranoid. This was the safest place for her.

“Sleep well little goddess,” Techno muttered, a hand on her back.

Despite the trials, he didn’t mind being a father.

Eret

Eret put a small flower crown on the infant’s head that matched the one he was wearing, smiling as she giggled, before picking her up, continuing on their daily walk through the SMP.

It was a lot of trial and error with the pair but Eret was a quick learner and adapted to the needs of his new child. He didn’t do as much as he once did with his friends, fewer prank wars with Fundy, and less involvement with Tommy’s antics, but he didn’t mind. He spent those hours with his little princess now; taking walks with her, playing with her along the way and in the castle, and making clothes that made her the adorable princess that she.

Of course, he did still sometimes get involved.

“Eret!” Tommy yelled on the walkie.

Eret chuckled as he took it from his pocket. “It seems Tommy is having troubles again princess.” She gave a babble and Eret nodded. “You’re very right. Let’s see what he needs. Yes, Tommy?”

“I need your help at my base ASAP!” Tommy demanded.

“It’s nothing dangerous right?” He asked.

“Of course not, now if you could hurry.”

He shook his head chuckling. “Alright, I’m on my way.”

Putting the walkie away, he hugged his little girl lightly as he changed direction.

“Sorry princess, we need to go check on Tommy. I know you won’t mind though.”

There were other times that had happened similarly and Eret would take (Y/N) with him to meet the younger boy. The younger boy’s energy would rub off on the infant and she would get excited as well, babbling and giggling constantly. As long as nothing dangerous was going on, Eret was glad to bring (Y/N) over as it always brought a smile to his face at how adorable she’d get.

Walking onto Tommy's property, he saw the young boy waiting impatiently outside his dirt home.

“There you are! You brought the brat?” He huffed.

“Come now, Tommy. (Y/N) loves being around you, at least be kind to her.” Eret smiled, knowing the boy meant no ill will.

“Right, now!” Tommy said dramatically as he opened the door to his base. “I need to make a plan!”

Following him in, he saw Tubbo was also there looking over a paper with Tommy’s handwriting on it. Tubbo looked up as they came in and grinned seeing the little girl in Eret’s arms.

“You brought (Y/N)!” Tubbo exclaimed excitedly as he came over. “Can I hold her?”

Eret laughed as he nodded, helping the other boy hold her. Tubbo enjoyed seeing the little girl, loving to play with her and spend time with her. There were times when Eret would let Tubbo babysit his princess so he could do a few more dangerous tasks.

“You got a little crown, you’re really a princess now.” Tubbo grinned as the girl babbled at him.

“We’re not here for (Y/N), we’re here to plan!” Tommy protested now.

Tommy didn’t mind the small child, he just got annoyed when the focus would come off him.

Focus went back on Tommy but Eret left after a little while to give (Y/N) her lunch for the day. She had gotten energetic after seeing the two boys, babbling and giggling as Eret played with her on the walk back. As they got back to his castle, he saw a wrapped package and note at the main door. Picking it up, he saw it was Fundy’s handwriting.

You stand no chance, it’s for (Y/N)

He raised an eyebrow, opening the package then laughed.

“It seems Fundy wishes to make you love him more than me.” Eret showed her the fox plushy, making her eyes sparkle as he gave it to her. “But I know that you’ll always love me, princess.” He booped her nose, (Y/N) looking at his sunglasses, babbling. “That’s right. I think this prank was an automatic failure. I love you princess.”

Dream

“Come on (Y/N), you just got to hold out your hands to me,” Sapnap told the infant in the crib at the community house.

“No, she’s going to me,” George argued.

The little girl looked between the two as they went between bickering and encouraging her to hold her hands out to them. Then she looked directly between them and held her arms out giggling.

“What?” George looked behind them and yelped seeing Dream.

“What are you idiots doing?” Dream laughed as he picked up his daughter.

“We were trying to get (Y/N) to choose her favorite uncle, but then you ruined it.” Sapnap huffed, crossing his arms.

“Well, I am her favorite person.” Dream bragged as he pulled his mask up while looking at the little girl. “Peek-a-boo.”

The girl gave a little squeal of laughter and Dream chuckled rubbing his nose against hers.

“She loves both of you idiots.” Dream told them, put his mask back on. “You’re her uncles.”

“Yeah, but I got to prove Uncle Sapnap is the best.” Sapnap pointed to himself.

“No! I’m better than you of course.”

The two bickered and Dream shook his head at his friends before leaving the community house.

“Your uncles are stupid.” Dream whispered to the little girl, tickling her stomach making her giggle. “Why don’t we go look at what the new people have built today, sound good sweetheart?”

After Dream had taken in the little girl, his life had most certainly brightened more as their world around them grew. She was a constant ball of happiness that always made Dream and his friends smile. Of course, they had to power through learning how to take care of a baby, a lot of screaming coming from all parties the first night they had the child. But they were starting to get the hang of it.

One thing Dream loved to do that always seemed to please the little girl was taking her around to see the new buildings that were slowly starting to appear as more people joined their land of the SMP. She seemed to like taking in the new sights so Dream took her whenever someone new came or a new build appeared.

“I don’t know what I’m going to do with your uncles when you get older. They’re going to be falling over each other to get your attention.” Dream told her as he walked. “I think they think I’ll like whoever wins. You’re my special little girl after all. But what they don’t know, is I don’t care as long as you’re happy.”

It was very true that Dream’s two best friends were always falling each other to get the attention of the infant already. They got her many things to win her over, having similar competitions when Dream wasn’t looking. Right now, the score was even.

To try and balance the two-out, Dream would alternate on who he took out for dangerous adventures and who would stay with his little girl. He couldn’t send the both of them on their own, unfortunately, least one of them “trips” into a lava pool.

Dream stopped on the edge of the new property, (Y/N) looking at the colorful flowers decorating it.

He was a bit hesitant to show her off to others as he wasn’t the most trusting but if they were going to be part of his land, he would introduce her out principle. He did say she was going to be the princess of his land.

“No new faces today doesn’t seem Tommy is around.” Dream said to her. “We’ll see him later I’m sure. How about we go visit Punz for a bit?”

He walked away from the property. There were so many people on his land now, he was sure it would become a bright place where his little princess could always be happy.

Lost Ones Taglist: @kakamihasatmblr @ialexabsuniverse @teaguecosmos @chaosofsmarty

A/N: If you want to be in this taglist I have a post on my page you can reply on or just send me an ask :)

#mcyt x reader #mcyt fanfiction #dreamsmp #tommyinnit x reader #wilbur soot x reader #philza x reader #technoblade x reader #eret x reader #dream x reader

1K notes · View notes

comfyswitcherblanketfort · 4 years

Text

Grunge-Metal Geralt

Hi, im fucking trash for the idea of Geralt being the front man for a Five Finger Death Punch type band and my brain wouldn’t shut the fuck up about it. This music genre is my bread and butter and I think Geralt’s repressed but highly emotional ass would fit right in. Yes im using another Hozier song, no i dont wanna hear anything about it. I’m a basic bitch and ive made my peace with it

Warnings: i honestly have no idea, its a little horny, little emotional, but theres no actual character interaction?, its at a concert venue? idk yall.

_________________________

Jaskier was… out of his comfort zone.

It’s not that he didn’t like the grunge-metal music, he just hadn’t listened to much and he was not used to the energy. People were yelling and screaming and the opener hadn’t even come on yet. He didn’t feel unsafe, far from it. Several people had checked to see if he was okay, seeing as he was the only person in the entire arena wearing a sweater that wasn't ripped or faded to hell. It was just a far cry from the shows he was used to.

He played folky-blues. This was nothing like his shows.

When the lights went down the crowd was deafening, all moving as one to rush the front of the floor, not giving a single fuck about tickets.

The openers were exciting, and Jaskier was surprised by some of the concepts and messages behind the music. It wasn’t what he’d expected at all and he found himself searching them up on Spotify to listen later.

Then came The Witchers.

Eskel and Lambert made their energetic entrance, followed by Aiden calmly walking to his drums and sitting as if he were walking into a college class. But Geralt was nowhere in sight. The one person Jaskier had actually come to see.

He’d seen a video clip from a previous concert where they covered one of his songs, and he was praying they’d do it again. It was lovely in a haunting-almost-threatening way, and the expression in Geralt’s posture alone was enthralling. He had to see it live.

But Geralt was still absent as the band started to build a song. First Aiden with the beat, then Eskel’s bass, then Lambert with a melody on his electric guitar. It built and built and built to a fever pitch, taking the crowd with it. People were already jumping and screeching. Jaskier had to stand on his seat to see the stage clearly.

Geralt’s voice echoed through the venue, low and closer to a growl than singing, but he was still nowhere to be seen.

Jaskier thought he’d been prepared, but his whole body was covered in goosebumps. He briefly wondered if this was what his friends were feeling when they listened to ASMR.

Geralt remained hidden for the whole first verse, getting the crowd even more excited than Jaskier thought possible, only for the band to go completely silent for a whole measure. When the crowd's screams reached their absolute loudest, Geralt dropped from on top of one of the jumbotrons, landing on one of the horse-sized speakers before launching into the chorus.

Oh fuck, he was even more beautiful in person.

He was… well he was a beast of a man. Jaskier really didn’t have another word for the way his muscles bulged and how lithe and powerful he looked springing from the speaker to join his bandmates on the main stage. His thighs filled out his black, tattered jeans and there were clear faded spots where his muscles strained the fabric too often. The thin black tank he wore did nothing but pretend the man was semi-modest. It was so tight, the only thing left up to the imagination was tan lines and the color of his nipple piercings.

Jaskier was most entranced by his long, white, wavy hair falling past his shoulders. As the show continued and he started to sweat, a lot, it got curlier and curlier at the root. Jaskier wanted to give him a mask and some curl cream, but only after a, uhm, rough night of getting to know each other. He’d heard rumors about Geralt from hitting arenas not long after they’d left. He was quite sure they’d have a great time.

As he focused on the lyrics more and more, he was more inclined to want to wrap Geralt up in a hug and worship every part of him until he felt whole again.

Either he’d been shown the shitty side of the genre, or The Witchers were exceptions to the rule of content. Jaskier was almost moved to tears a few different times.

Finally, about an hour into Jaskier mindlessly feasting his eyes on the front man, Geralt leapt onto another speaker and sat down, breathing hard and grinning from ear to ear.

“You still with us?”

The unholy screech from the crowd left no doubt they were just as excited, if not more so, than when they’d arrived.

“Good! Good..” he trailed off, chuckling as he lowered the mic to take a breath, “We’re gonna slow it down for a minute,” he leaned forward and held the mic away as Eskel shouted something up at him to which he laughed and flipped him off.

“As I was saying, we’re gonna yearn for a minute or two and do a cover. Song by Jaskier called ‘Talk’.”

The crowd lost their shit again, various pride flags popping up throughout the stands.

Geralt chuckled and raised his combat boot, showing off the bi flag colored treads, earning another round of screams. If this is what the grunge-metal scene was like, Jaskier had been missing out his entire life. Sure his fans were sweet and supportive and loving when he’d come out. But this was electric and feral and completely addictive.

Lambert struck the opening chord to Jaskier’s song and the crowd settled to a gentle hum, setting the tone immediately, as if they all knew exactly what was coming.

Geralt closed his eyes as he tapped his thigh with one finger, keeping time before his rumbling baritone hit Jaskier like a freight train.

“I’d be the voice that urged Orpheus when her body was found…”

Jaskier could have collapsed right there. He knew he was staring like a lovesick idiot, but hell, everyone around him was too. When the chorus hit and Eskel came in with a heavy bass line he nearly fell off his chair. Geralt’s intensity raised with the addition of the backup but he didn’t move. He stayed seated, swaying slightly, with his eyes closed as he crooned out the words Jaskier had sobbed as he wrote, broken hearted and miserable.

It was surreal.

Sure he’d seen other covers. Sure they’d been lovely. But he wanted to listen to this and only this as he fell asleep for the rest of his life. He’d never play it again if he could only hear it one more time.

After the last verse Lambert launched into a guitar solo while Geralt jumped off the speaker and meandered to the center of the stage to slot his mic back in it’s stand. He gripped it like a lifeline when Lambert held one last note for as long as his instrument would allow and only started singing the last chorus when it was almost silent.

“I won't deny I've got in my mind now all the things I would do

So I'll try to talk refined for fear that you find out how I'm imaginin' you

I won't deny I've got in my mind now all the things we could do

So I'll try to talk refined for fear that you find out how I'm imaginin' you”

His expression looked hopeless and utterly desperate as he crooned out the last two lines. He let his hair fall to cover his face and Jaskier could just barely hear his panting breath over the sound system as the crowd exploded. Geralt tipped his head back and took two deep breaths before straightening up and getting on with the show but Jaskier was stuck.

He was vaguely aware of someone taking a picture of him, but he really couldn’t care less. The fact that Geralt moved right on to a song called ‘Burn Motherfucker Burn’ didn’t matter either.

Jaskier jumped down from his arena seat, whipping out his phone and sending the band a tweet, because apparently that’s what musicians did now?

“Record it. Please. It’s either that or sing me to sleep every night. You choose.”

He stayed for the rest of the show and walked to his car in a haze. Before he backed out of his spot he checked his phone like always and his heart nearly stopped at the two top notifications.

One public reply: “Both? -G”

And one direct message: “If you’re still here and want to grab a drink, I’m just backstage.”

909 notes · View notes

dreadlockholiday · 4 years

Text

Stucky Fic Rec List #3

by @dreadlockholiday

Part #1 - #2 - #3 of my Rec List.

Note: ALL FICS ARE COMPLETE, some of them belong to a series with additional works.

🍃 Kiss With A Fist by IndigoNight - [Explicit; 5k words]

[Post-Azzano; Spanking; Bottom!Bucky; Cathartic Crying; Hurt/Comfort]

“Undress,” Steve orders, resting his back against the door for just a second while he braces himself for what he’s about to do. He’s only done something like this a few times before; usually it was Bucky pulling him back into line and draining the pent up rage out of him after yet another back alley fist fight. But now Bucky needs him, and he’s damn well going to do whatever Bucky needs.

*****

In the aftermath of Azzano, Bucky is drowning in the pent up rage and fear that he can't let go of. Fortunately, Steve is there to help.

🖤 i think i was blind before i met you by finnhoe - [Explicit; 15,6k words]

[College AU; Barista!Steve; Strangers to Lovers; Bottom!Bucky; Fast Burn]

steve is an unsuspecting barista at a university starbucks and bucky is a college student that just needs some sleep, godammit. making out, phone number exchanges, ice skating, and car sex ensues.

🌇 Every Now and Every Then by shouldbeover - [Explicit; 1,7k words]

[Canon Divergence; Post-Endgame; Retired Stucky; Vacation; Smut; Bottom!Steve]

Just a post-Endgame fixit. Steve and Bucky with no problems.

🌶️ you can't take heart and soul by @endofadream - [Explicit; 4,3k words]

[Canon Divergence; Bottom!Bucky; Rough Sex; Praise Kink; Mild Breathplay]

The way he arches is a thing of beauty: the late-afternoon light paints the wall in slanting tones of faded yellow, casting half of Bucky’s face in shadow. It highlights the arch of his cheekbones, the sculpted hollow of his cheeks. The fanned flutter of his lashes when he closes his eyes.

God. Steve had almost forgotten how good Bucky sounds when he begs. Breathy, a little high-pitched. Every bit Steve’s.

☕ Five times Steve didn't get his coffee, and one time he did by @deadto27 - [Gen; 8,7k words]

[Modern AU; A/B/O; Alpha!Steve x Omega!Bucky; Barista!Bucky; Pre-Serum Steve; Human Disaster Steve; Pining]

Steve just expects a normal morning, getting coffee from his favourite place. Instead, he's floored by the new barista, makes a fool of himself, and tries desperately to win his affection with courting gifts.

-----

For Steve, it’s like being struck by lightning.

One moment everything is the same as it always is, and the next, his world has turned upside down. It’s just visceral, his reaction. Every sense comes to life and he can’t focus on anything except the feeling that he’s just met the person he’s supposed to be with.

🍑 breathe & relax by freshwoods - [Explicit; 4k words]

[College AU; Massage; Ass Worship; Bottom! Steve]

Steve knows from personal experience just how good Bucky can be with his hands, and won’t look a gift-horse in the mouth.

🍓 Forgive Me If You Remember by Judeyjude - [Teen; 53,4k words]

[Shrunkyclunks; Post Infinity War; Enemies to Friends to Lovers; Falling in Love; Canonical Character Death; Grieving; Hurt/Comfort; Temporary Amnesia; Angst with a Happy Ending]

When they finally tumbled into bed, Bucky straddled Steve and said, “Just because we danced, doesn’t mean you can die.”

Steve pulled Bucky down and kissed him slowly. “Never,” he whispered in Bucky’s ear.

–

Part 1: In which Bucky yells at a National Icon, grieves the aftermath of the world losing half its population, and somehow falls in love along the way.

Part 2: When time rewinds five years, everything Bucky had ever wanted suddenly becomes true—to have his family back. The price paid? Worldwide memory loss.

🍽️ Happy Accidents by Slagathor99, art by @elkleggs - [Mature; 11,7k words]

[Shrunkyclunks; Chef/Caterer!Bucky; Cooking; Domestic Fluff; Humor; Making Out]

Bucky and Steve have a date planned. A nice, romantic date. With, of course, some fun plans for "dessert." Which works great, because Bucky is pretty sure he's beginning to fall for Steve. Unfortunately, their kitchen equipment has other plans.

🌬️ one man loved the pilgrim soul in you by ourraeofsunshine - [Explicit; 1,7k words]

[College AU; English Major!Bucky; Smut; Bottom!Bucky]

Bucky doesn’t know when he starts crying, but his arms are wet when he lifts his head. A breeze comes in the window and presses against his face, each tear, and then Steve is there, pulling his head back and pressing a kiss until all the salt is gone and all that’s left is Steve.

Steve. Steve. Steve. This. This. This.

“Everything,” Steve says. “You are everything.”

+ Bonus Series

💫 Invisibuck by @im-weapon - [Explicit; 2 works; 22,5k words]

[Shrunkyclunks; Invisible!Bucky; Dom/Sub Undertones; Bottom!Bucky]

-> Magpie - [10,9k words; Light Bonadage]

"I am picking up life signs indicative of a human adult male.”

“In my bedroom? That sounds unlikely,” Steve said, dryly.

“Nevertheless sir, my sensors are usually highly accurate.”

Steve hauled himself out of the chair on his balcony and silently slid the door open back to the interior of the apartment, high above the baking streets of Manhattan. He lowered his voice considerably, “What are they doing, and how did they get in?”

JARVIS’s voice emitted quietly from the wall closest to his left ear, “The thing is, captain, the intruder appears to be invisible.”

–

-> Not Sorry - [11,5k words; Kink Negotiaion; Praise Kink; Insecure Bucky; Spanking; Hand-feeding; Mild Breathplay]

“Bucky?”

“Bucky, I know you’re in here.”

“Bucky, if you don’t come out, I’m going to go out to eat dinner without you, and leave you locked in here to try and cook for yourself. We both know that won’t end well.”

Minutes of silence passed. Steve sighed and gave up, turning to fetch his jacket and bike keys from the bedroom. He had tried waiting patiently, bribery, asking questions he knew Bucky would feel compelled to answer but Bucky was clearly otherwise occupied in his invisible state. Probably having a crisis over his identity. Like he did every day.

#stucky fic rec #stucky fanfic #fic rec #rec list #dready's fic recs

107 notes · View notes

imaginejamesandsirius · 3 years

Note

Maybe a pregnant trans Sirius feels insecure about his appearance and James comforts him, lots of fluff and NSFW 🥺

Sirius knew, logically, that he was chock full of hormones, which made him overreact and all around feel ridiculously emotional.

Unfortunately, logic didn't make itself known when he was on the verge of tears because his shirt didn't fit anymore. It wasn't even his favourite shirt. He tugged on the bottom, trying to see if this would be the time that it finally stayed lower than his belly instead of rising back up so half of his stomach was hanging out-- or at least that's how it felt to him, like half of his stomach was out. When he was wearing the maternity trousers-- the ones with elastic on top and made to look like jeans on the bottom-- his skin wasn't showing, but right now, he was wearing regular sweats that were slung under his stomach since he was just walking around the flat. Unsurprisingly, it slid higher, and he gave a pathetic sniffle as the tears spilled over.

He had maternity shirts. He could wear those; he knew that. But wearing the maternity shirt was like admitting that he was going to get bigger. Which, yes, he knew that that would be the case, logically. Logically, Sirius wouldn't have even tried to wear this shirt because he knew that he would be too big for it. Realistically, Sirius didn't want his body to change, in spite of knowing that it was inevitable as his pregnancy continued.

There was nothing wrong with the maternity shirts. He'd tried them on before he bought them, and they were comfortable. It was just... well, he'd had to buy them in the women's section. It didn't mean anything; he knew that. It still irked him.

"Hey," James called as he stepped into the flat. He kicked the door shut and toed off his shoes while holding a grocery bag in one hand. "I picked up some butter pecan ice cream for you." Then James looked over and his eyes went a little wide in alarm. "Woah, hey, are you alright?" He walked over even though he'd only managed to get one shoe off. He set the bag on the counter and put a hand on Sirius's back.

Sirius sniffed, tugging again on the bottom of the shirt. "Hormones."

James, ever watchful, noticed Sirius messing with his shirt. He pushed it higher so he could slip his hand against Sirius's skin. "I think you look amazing," he said in a low voice.

"You have to say that; you're my husband," Sirius muttered, wiping at his face.

"I have to say it because it's true, and I love you," James said. "There's a difference." He pressed a kiss to the side of Sirius's head. "Is that what was bothering you? You don't like how you look?"

"I dunno," he said, because it was hard to feel bad about himself when James was around. Not to mention, his hand felt wonderfully warm against his skin, and it was difficult to be worried about anything when his thoughts turned in that direction.

James hummed, acknowledging what he said. He didn't push for more, and he didn't move away. He pressed another kiss to Sirius's head.

Sirius sighed, leaning into him. "All the maternity clothes were in the women's section. I like my shirts."

"The maternity shirts are still your shirts," James reminded him gently. "I saw how you looked in them, and let me tell you sweetheart, that was some good shite. Come on, let's go make sure it's still true."

Sirius snorted, hearing the smile in his voice and knowing exactly what he was thinking about. "You just want to get me naked."

"I would never," he lied, grin widening.

"Uh-huh," Sirius said.

"Is that a yes?"

"Sure," he said, wiping at his face as the last few tears leaked out. Chances were that James couldn't make him feel worse, even if putting on one of those shirts was the last thing he wanted to do.

"Great," James said, pulling his hand back from Sirius's stomach so he could put the ice cream in the freezer.

Sirius thought about going to their room before him since he knew that was where they were going to end up, but he wasn't exactly in a hurry. Logically, he knew that he was going to like how this ended, but it wasn't settling and calming him down like he wanted. So he stayed where he was and waited for James to take off his other shoe and throw it towards the door, then take his hand and lead him away.

It did make him feel a little silly. Almost like he was a little kid. Except the being-led-away-by-someone's-hand was the only part of the entire day that was like being a kid.

James let go of his hand when they got into their room, and he walked to the closet. He headed straight for the left side and reached to the back where Sirius had shoved the maternity shirts so he didn't have to see them. "What about this one?" James asked, holding up a blue and white striped one. "I like this one."

"Yeah, I like it too, but that's not- James, me liking it isn't the problem."

"Are you sure? I mean, have you tried it on since you actually got big enough to need it?"

That was a good point, and Sirius hesitated before he answered. "No. But I really don't think it'll make a difference?"

James pulled the shirt off the hangar. "Humour me?"

"Fine, but you have to pick up dinner tonight. From Bodelli's."

"Deal," James said, as if he hadn't agreed to fulfill Sirius's every single food desire the moment they'd found out that he was pregnant.

With a small huff, Sirius took off his shirt-- conscious of his protruding stomach-- and pulled the striped one on.

"How's it feel?"

Sirius tugged on the bottom to get it situated, but it hadn't been necessary. This shirt covered his bump perfectly. He'd be able to walk around like normal, without having to constantly adjust it to make sure he wasn't flashing skin. Wearing clothes from the women's section usually had a chance of fitting entirely wrong at the chest or being too tight under the arms; this one was fine. Which, yes, he'd known that from when he'd originally tried it on and bought it, but time and a heap of worry had made him forget that. "Good," he said reluctantly. Reluctant because there had been an irrational part of him hoping that he'd get to wear his usual shirts if these were horrid. He knew it didn't make sense, but crying over his shirt not fitting also didn't make sense and he'd done that not five minutes ago.

"Good," James echoed with a smile. Soft and loving, as it often was these days. "And trust me, you look great."

"I can't take your word for it," Sirius said, only half-joking. "You'd say whatever I wanted to hear."

"I most certainly would not," he replied.

"Liar."

James rolled his eyes and closed the closet door so that the floor-length mirror was available. When Sirius didn't move, he walked over and nudged him into position. Once there, he rested his chin on Sirius's shoulder. "See? You look incredible."

Sirius thought that 'incredible' might be overexaggerating. He looked good, he would admit, but great? Incredible? No way. Of course, James had a massive blindspot where Sirius was concerned; he always had. "Two seconds ago, I only looked great."

"Is great a downgrade from incredible?" James asked, but he let his voice go quiet and turned his head so that his voice was in Sirius's ear. "I always thought they were equally wonderful."

"Oh so now I'm wonderful too?"

"Of course you are. There's no need to go fishing for compliments, you know. All you have to do is show up."

James really was sickly sweet, at times. Fortunately, Sirius loved it. Loved it so much, in fact, that he was a touch oblivious to what James's hands were doing because he was so busy listening to his voice. It came as a bit of a surprise when James's hand slipped inside his pants, then. "Fuck," Sirius breathed, leaning back against James more heavily. He knew that James could take his weight, even with him ballooning up the way he was.

"I hope that's a good reaction," James muttered, moving his fingers in small circles as he kissed Sirius's neck.

"You know it is."

James started to pull his hand out, and Sirius caught his arm, holding tight.

"Don't you dare stop," Sirius said. He may not have had this in mind ten minutes ago, but in addition to being close to tears at any given moment, he was also unbearably horny. Really, the last time he'd been this desperate, he'd been a teenager. One little touch from James, and he was wet and roaring to go. He would rip James's head off rather than stop, something James was well aware of.

"I was just going to move to the bed."

"Fine, but you're on thin ice," Sirius grumbled. He let James pull him over a couple feet, and he shucked his sweats and underwear before climbing on the bed. He thought he was being wonderfully accommodating and that James should follow suit, but James didn't bother to take off any clothes before following him on. Rude.

He was appeased for a minute when James kissed him and slid two fingers in, but after a little bit, he said, "I thought the point of an afternoon shag was where you actually shagged me?"

Undeterred, James said, "We ran out of condoms yesterday, and I haven't had a chance to get more."

"Who gives a shite? It's not like I can get more pregnant."

"You hate the mess," James said, still not moving from his current position.

That was true but, "For god's sake, just fuck me already."

James snickered but dutifully pulled his fingers out so he could get undressed.

"If you're laughing at me-" Sirius started to say.

"I'm not."

"Then what're you laughing at?" he asked. He sat up so he could pull off his shirt-- just because it wasn't as horrible of a maternity shirt as he'd been worried didn't mean that he wanted to get shagged while wearing it-- then laid back down.

"The way you said it. Like we're some couple that schedules when we have sex because we don't like each other. No time for talking because we’ll only fight."

Sirius snickered, because now that he thought of it, it had sounded that way. "Yeah, that's our problem: we don't like each other."

"Oh, absolutely," James said with a grin as he got back onto the bed. He kissed Sirius's cheek before his mouth because he was a sappy idiot that way. "Our marriage is hanging by a thread."

"We're having a kid to try and save it."

"How horrible of us," James said, and Sirius's chuckle turned into a moan as James slowly slid inside. "God I love you," he breathed. "You know that, yeah?"

"Joking about it didn't make me think it was true, you know," Sirius managed to say. He was so easily overwhelmed these days, but he knew that it didn't bother James, so it didn't bother him either.

"Good," James said with a warm smile, leaning down further to kiss him again. Sirius's stomach was going to get too big for them to do this soon, but for now, Sirius curled a hand around his neck and enjoyed it.

#prongsfoot #marauders #fanfic #sirius black #james potter #filled #established relationship #no magic au #post hogwarts #siriuslystarbucks

25 notes · View notes

jeogiyall · 4 years

Text

Pas De Deux; H.HJ

Word Count; 9.7k

Genre; Fluff, Childhood Best Friends to Lovers, Reader X Hyunjin

Warnings; Swearing, Suggestive, I would advise against reading if you have abandonment issues? It’s brought up a few times,,

Additional; Featured Chan, Felix, Jisung, and Minho; Ballerina Reader, Dance Partner Hyunjin, Reid once again writing about something that she has no idea how to do, (Sort Of) Slow Burn

A/N; when i tell u guys that i literally have no self control,, THE ORIGINAL DRAFT OF THIS WAS 10.46K ASFDSFS someone save me from myself. i’m sorry if anything’s inaccurate, i haven’t done ballet since i was like five and most of my research is from the unreliable internet,,, so if any ballerinas read this and are repulsed i’m sorry asdfdsa. please leave something nice if you enjoy <3<3<3<3

The last time that you saw Hwang Hyunjin was in fifth grade. You were wrapped up in each other on your front porch, him choking out tears as though it hurt.

“Jinnie!” You cooed while running a hand through his short black hair, “I’m not dying, just going to boarding school!” His cries (along with the ringing guilt in your ears) only grew louder, “You’re really good at dancing, just audition next year!” He shook his head fervently against the crook of your shoulder, wet tears falling onto your skin.

“You know I suck at ballet!” If it weren’t for his palms pulling at his teary cheeks you would’ve giggled, maybe even teased him for the time in class that he almost broke his wrist while warming up at the barre. But he was crying, he was sad, and he was convinced that he’d never see you again. The sight alone was enough to make you pout, which only served to make him cry harder, “You could join my contemporary class for the summer?” He asked with starry, red eyes. It was almost enough to make you say yes.

“You know that I suck at contemporary!” The boy giggled at your counter, a sound that made your heart soar amidst all of the crying.

“Yea, you do...” He brought a hand up to his cheeks, trying desperately to wipe away tears that wouldn’t stop falling, “Just promise that you won’t forget me! I won’t forget you so you can’t forget me!” His pinky finger extended so it was nearly brushing the spot in between your eyebrows, and you were hit by the whispers of your first crush. With the summer days spent riding scooters in your driveway, and the winter ones spent sledding in it. With the long nights spent giggling about nothing underneath a blanket fort, or the endless days spent climbing trees in the bottomless woods behind the boys house. You were hit with the last five years all at once, and you knew instantly that even if he wasn’t standing in front of you with a teary face that you would still promise.

“I promise.” You answered while hooking your pinky in his as if it were a vow.

The school ended up being a perfect fit, your favorite part being the dorm room all to yourself. Even though it was small, and very ugly, it was all yours. Just like the friend group that blossomed out of your first ever co-ed class (which is sadly not a very interesting story. Han Jisung just made you swear to not dislocate his shoulders during partner stretches, and who are you to break a promise? Afterwards you received an invite to sit with him and his friend at lunch, the rest is history. Loud, annoying history.)

Nothing could’ve made it better... Well, nothing except for your sweet friend who had once occupied each thought in your head. Your sweet friend who’s summers were suddenly too full to see you, even for just a day.

Your sweet friend who didn’t keep his promise.

When it was announced that the contemporary and ballet branches of your dance institute would be merging for a year, your mind immediately jumped to Hyunjin. Despite not seeing him for almost six years. He always had such a passion for the style, making you miss out on hours of homework to watch videos of his favorite performers (it’s not like you minded too much, though.)

Han’s, on the other hand, was pure rage. Pure rage which he was letting out from your bed while watching you unpack.

“I just don’t get why they have to take a ballet class too! I have enough trouble getting solos as is.” The boy pouts while resting his head on your orange wood headboard. You’d feel sympathetic if it weren’t for the fact that he was blatantly lying, Han Jisung had gotten nearly every solo since eighth grade. Instead you roll your eyes dramatically and throw him a wadded ball of fabric from your suitcase. Naturally, he screams.

“Shut the fuck up and be helpful.” You scold, earning a childish whine while he sits up to fold the countless leotards.

“Remind me why I missed you?” He grumbles just as your other, much nicer, friend walks into the cramped room.

“Aww, you missed me Sungie?” Felix asks, voice booming deeply through the space. The two of you instantly drop the clothes in your hands and run to the boy, which you should reprimand Jisung for seeing as he just lifted a finger. But you don’t, because Felix is here with more freckles than the last time you saw him and fresh pink hair that’s definitely going to be dyed natural again within the first week.

“Yes.” The energetic boy answers while worming his way into your hug. Felix giggles softly while petting Han’s dark brown hair before pressing noisy kisses all over his cheeks. He pokes Felix’s ribs as retaliation, to which the boy screeches (directly into your ear, might I add,) and it’s back to the normal, loud chaos “I will kill you!”

“Hey! No murder in my room, if you’re gonna do that go in the hallway!” You snap playfully, pushing Jisung away while moving back into the hug, “Help me unpack? Jisung hasn’t done shit.”

“Not fair!” The boy shouts from your bed, which he’s already plopped back down on.

“I’ll help, besides do you even want him folding your clothes?” You look over your shoulder to see Jisung with his hands tangled up in three different leotards, then back to Felix with terrified eyes.

‘No,’ you mouth, eliciting another laugh from your friend. He moves over to the bed as well, then sets Jisungs hands free. The three of you talk mindlessly for hours, rambling on about Felix’s summer home and the month that you and Jisung spent traipsing around the boys hometown.

“How do you feel about the merger?” You ask suddenly, cutting Jisung off in the middle of an embarrassing story about a night spent at his house. Felix sighs deeply while tossing you the rolled leotard (your favorite one, light blue with pearls sewn around the collar,) while Jisung throws a wadded up pair of tights at your face.

“It’s fine I guess, just for a year right?” You shrug while the brunette puts on a grimace, hands suddenly very busy with folding, “They really need that rebuild, building’s falling apart. Ours is way better and we have extra room, so why not share?”

“Tell that to the rat in my mini fridge.” Han grumbles while passing you a pile of black leotards. You laugh and accept, but not before ruffling his stiff hair.

“Okay, I’ll make sure to do that the next time I’m in your room. Are you done bitching now?” The brunette pokes his tongue out at you jokingly, to which you respond with blowing a raspberry, “Felix is right, besides how terrible is it going to be? We’re all dancers right, and stuff like that is meant to be shared. Who are we to say that they can’t come and learn?” The room turns uncomfortably quiet, Jisung gnawing at his lower lip while Felix picks up his phone.

“Damn it!” The Australian exclaims as his screen lights up. You and Han look at him with furrowed eyebrows before he rolls his eyes and brings the phone up in between your faces, “Administration says I have to fix my hair.”

Han doubles over with laughter, knocking the mountain of leotards (followed shortly by himself) onto the floor. You follow his lead, and before you know it the three of you are clutching your sides and wiping away happy tears. Felix’s hands ruffle into your hair with a hum, “Maybe I can try Jisungs color, hmm?” You duck away with a snort.

“No! I draw the line at matching hair!” The brunette defends, hands moving to cover the top of his head. Felix lunges at him, fully ready to engage in a tickle fight. Naturally, Jisung screams as if he’s being murdered. It should be annoying, any other time you would find it annoying. But these are your best friends, one of which you haven’t seen in over a month, and for some odd reason your heart feels so full that it could explode.

“C’mon Lix, I’ll do your hair. What do you think about blonde?”

And even though tomorrow your school is going to be flooded with new people, and your classes full of students who have probably never done more than basic positions, in the moment it feels okay. Because one of your best friends is screaming ‘NO DON’T TOUCH MY HAIR!’ while the other assures him that ‘It’ll probably most likely be okay! Look, she did mine!’ It’s a perfect chaos that you wouldn’t trade for anything.

There have been plenty of strange coincidences in your life. Like how your first dog was named Felix, and it’s now the name of one of your best friends (who’s hair ended up looking perfectly fine, thank you very much.) Or how your usual waiter at the diner in Jisungs hometown ended up being the cousin of your first kiss. Or how your dorm room is the only one on the hall with painted walls, that just so happen to be your favorite color. Plenty of weird things, but none are as weird as this. Because you’re sitting on the floor of your second class of the day, ‘Intro To Pas De Deux,’ and Hwang Hyunjin has just entered through the side door. Two minutes late.

He’s hard to recognize at first, seeing as there’s more than an added foot of height and black hair that’s creeping down the back of his neck, but the more you look the more you recognize. Pillowy lips, full cheeks, a freckle right in the set of his eye bags. You’re not entirely sold until he laughs, a sweet and breathy sound. The laugh that’s always been three seconds away from turning into a wheeze.

“What’s wrong?” Jisung questions while pulling himself up by your hands, eyes following the line that yours draw to Hyunjin, “Do you know him or something?”

You’re about to answer when Hyunjin finally turns around, eyes scanning the room before settling on you. He thinks that you look different, too. Taller and slimmer, everything that used to be squishy replaced with soft muscle. But there’s also the bridge of your nose, your hands that are barely gripping Jisungs, and of course your eyes that are staring at him like it hurts.

“(Y/n?)” He questions, your name falling from his lips as though it’s meant to do so. You nod, mouth falling open dumbly. The boy takes a step forward then freezes.

“Is anyone going to tell me what’s going on? Or at least help me finish stretching?” Jisungs voice reeks of annoyance, you think that if you weren’t in such a state of shock that you’d flick him on the forehead.

“You go to the contemporary school?” Jisung doesn’t take well to being ignored, puffing loudly while scrambling to finish stretching at the barre. Your brain immediately flashes back to Hyunjins second ballet class in third grade, when you were teaching him your favorite warm up stretches. He ended up tangled in between the barre and the wall, which shouldn’t even be possible, but Hyunjin managed.

“Um... Yea.” Every inch of your body is screaming to stand up and engulf him in a hug, but your legs feel like jello. That, and there’s a small feeling of anger rising in your throat, “L-let me help.” He plops down in front of you before you can say yes. You don’t have to though, Hyunjin still knows that you can’t refuse him. You take his hands in yours, definitely ignoring the pink flush to his cheeks, and pull his torso towards you.

“It’s been six years.” The words come out choked, full of the pain from your first summer without him. When you’d spend hours playing out in the sun, knocking on your friends front door every morning. He was never there.

“Sorry.” You want him to show some type of emotion, let you know that he cares. That he’s actually sorry for breaking his promise, “I tried to come and see you in July but you weren’t home.”

“I was at Jisung’s house, we spend the summers together.” If you were more angry and less hurt you would say ‘now that I don’t spend them with you,’ but he’s still Hyunjin. He’s still Hyunjin, and you don’t think that you could handle the way he would frown at your snide remark.

Jisung flashes you a look from his place at the barre that reads ‘Who is this guy and why do you look so sad?’ You let Hyunjin pull you into the stretch while responding with a gaze that says ‘I’ll tell you later.’ Hyunjins grip tightens on your hands as you exhale deeply into the stretch, the light blue fabric of your leotard brushing against the dance studio floor.

“(Y/n,) I-” Maybe it’s the way that he licks his lips before talking, or the fact that he looks so much and so little like your best friend at the same time, or possibly even how you can feel the way that he hugged you at your last meeting sitting on your shoulders like a winter coat, but his hands suddenly feel like fire.

“I have to go!” You exclaim, popping up out of the stretch and onto your feet in one swift motion. The boy looks up at you with puppy dog eyes that spark a feeling so intense in you that you have to look away, “I have to go, I-I’ll um... I’ll see you around.” You dash off to the spot in front of Jisung, silently thanking every star in the sky that Hyunjin doesn’t have a chance to follow you. Because just as soon as you get up someone else sits down and begins to excitedly ask the boy questions (he’s short, with a petite frame and an unfamiliar face. Probably another transfer student.)

“Did he say something to you?” Jisung asks as you jump into your favorite warm up routine. There’s not really a right way to answer, because did he say anything just now? No, but six years ago he said that he’d never forget you. He promised as much, and then spent every moment doing nothing but that. You exhale while your feet continue to move instinctively, a slight sense of peace washing over you at the comfort of a routine.

“We should focus, class is starting soon.” Jisung whines and argues, but you just ignore him. Similarly to how you ignore Hyunjins gaze on you for the rest of the class.

Ignoring Hyunjin is much easier than you anticipated. In class you can distract yourself with Jisung before the teacher comes in, and lunch is fine enough. While he is there, sitting at a table that’s painfully close to yours, he doesn’t try to talk. Or worse, come and snatch up the free seat across from Felix. But no, he does nothing of the sort. Just laughs with his friends and shoots the occasional glance your way (the one composed of sparkly eyes and lips that are a breath away from pouting.)

But then there’s now, standing in the doorway of your stage chemistry class and Hyunjin is all that you can see. Hyunjin, standing in the center of the room and pressing play on the terribly outdated stereo. Hyunjin, running a hand through his raven black hair and inhaling deeply with closed eyes. All you wanted was to get your jacket, but now you have enough Hyunjin for a lifetime.

Loud, bass heavy music swells in the room as he starts to move. At first the movements are jerky, awkward almost. But then the music decrescendos every so softly and he exhales, then proceeds to move as if the dance is being pulled out of him. As if this choreo is the way that he was programmed to move. When the song peaks you swear that you feel tears prickling the back of your eyes, because this is so Hyunjin. The way he’s dancing with every bone in his body, the way his hair is now dripping in sweat and flying all around him, the way his plump lips suck in air. It’s Hyunjin down to the core, and you’ve missed him so much.

When the music dies you clap slowly, causing the boy to shoot up like a frightened cat. He whips around to where you stand, softening like butter when he sees your frame leaned up against the wooden door frame.

“You scared me!” He shrieks, bringing up a hand to clutch his chest. It reminds you of your last Halloween with him, when the two of you got to trick or treat alone. Hyunjin decided that it would be a great idea to go to a fear farm, in which he screeched and clung to you the entire time. It wasn’t even that scary, he’s just a baby.

“Sorry.” You answer, mouth going as dry as the desert, “You, um... You’re really good.” He laughs flatly while moving over to his dance bag to pull out a towel. You watch as he dabs the sweat away, something stupid and needy churning in your stomach. You write it off as hunger.

“Thanks, I still suck at ballet though.” It’s a joke, you know it’s a joke, but something about laughing feels wrong.

“You don’t.” You take a step into the room, wandering over to where your windbreaker is piled on the floor next to the boy, “I’ve seen you in class, and you’re not bad. Just out of practice.” He lets out another flat laugh while dropping the towel, quickly exchanging it with a water bottle.

“Yea, about nine years out of practice. I barely even remember how to do a pirouette.” He’s trying so hard to make you laugh, just like the old days. The growing tension in your shoulders and lump in your throat is preventing that from happening.

“I can teach you.” You offer while shrugging the jacket on. Within seconds he’s babbling out excuses, which you wave off, “Don’t even worry about it, I need to practice anyways.” You bend down to untie your sneakers before moving to the center of the room, Hyunjin following in quick succession, “So you obviously know the proper foot technique, pointed toes only and all of that. And the retire position is just your foot in the notch above your knee.” You demonstrate it in the mirror, and even though he’s far from being a ballerina he’s done enough classes to know that you want him to copy it, “Yea, good. It looks good.”

“Where are my shoulders supposed to be?” He asks shyly, not used to questioning such simple things.

“Back, always back. Now check that your hips aren’t tilted, I-I’ve always been told to imagine that they’re a fruit bowl.” You steal a quick glance at the boy while he’s adjusting, heart fluttering the same way that it did so many years ago, “Okay, now um... Now put your feet into fourth position, just like that yea, then bend your knees and push off from your back leg.” You do the turn, a motion so natural that it might as well be brushing your teeth, “Like that, easy peasy!” The boy scoffs while bringing up his arms the same way that you had yours just seconds ago.

“Yea, easy peasy for you!” A soft giggle falls from your lips, bouncing off the walls of the empty studio (as well as Hyunjins ears.)

“C’mon!” You tease while moving around to face him, a soft smile playing at your lips, “You see me mess up in class all of the time, just go for it. The worst that could happen is being wrong.” He nods, then exhales shakily. When he does the turn it’s a bit wobbly, but definitely not anything worse than what you’ve seen before.

“Oh my god, (Y/n) that was terrible like genuinely awful-” The words feel harsh, but he’s wearing a bright smile and laughing like there’s not a care in the world. You can’t help but laugh too.

“No, no! It was fine!” You assure through a laugh as he gets back into position. From the corner of your eye you see him mouth ‘liar,’ which earns him a harsh flick between the eyes, “Just bring your hips a little more forward like...” It’s instinctual for your hand to fall onto his hipbone, something you’ve done to Felix hundreds of times. The main difference is that when you adjust Felix he usually tells you to fuck off, then softly knees your stomach. When you do it to Hyunjin he audibly chokes and you feel fire ignite beneath your fingertips, “Like this. Now go into fourth and try again, but keep your hips aligned!” The boy nods before sinking into position and pushing up into a flawless turn.

“I did it!” He exclaims, hands flying up like he’s about to hug you, “You were right, you were right I did it!” Something about his wide, excited eyes makes every wall built around your heart crumble into dust. So you accept the hug, once again allowing yourself to fall victim to the sweetness that is Hwang Hyunjin.

“I was what, I was... Did you say right?!” He rolls his eyes at your teasing, trying desperately to pretend like he didn’t miss it. It’s useless, because the way that Hyunjin’s holding you let’s you know that he’s missed you just as much as you have him, “Alright big guy, let me go. I’ve got studying to do and shoes to break in.” He whines lowly, arms trying to grab you as you snake away.

“Can we get dinner together or something?” He begs, hand briefly tangling itself in yours. You fight down the blush rising to your cheeks while pulling your hand away and stuffing it into your pocket.

“Not tonight, you have to keep practicing those pirouettes! But don’t worry, you’ll be seeing more of me... Partner.” Hyunjin smiles widely at your words, realization settling in as quickly as they leave your mouth.

“Do you mean...?”

“Yes,” You exhale, mentally preparing for another bone crushing hug, “I’ll be your partner for class.”

Hyunjins hug is almost nice enough that you forget about how annoying Jisung’s going to be when you tell him.

It turns out that the friends Hyunjin made are almost as amazing as the ones that you did. Everyone was a little awkward when the two groups first merged, specifically Jisung who was still butt hurt about you switching partners. But then Felix got to talking with Chan (the person who’s been mothering your friend ever since he started at the contemporary institute. From the way they talk, Hyunjin would’ve both starved and failed if it weren’t for the older boy,) and suddenly everyone was meeting in your room on Fridays for a weekly game of uno.

“Absolutely not, you’re fucking cheating!” Minho (the other new face from your stage chemistry class,) shouts while pointing a finger across the card pile and into Jisungs face. The boy moves to jokingly bite at it, causing Chan’s eyes to go as wide as the moon.

“No, no, no! No murder, and no biting what the hell!” You snort at your new friends bewildered expression while passing a canned sparkling water to Hyunjin. He accepts with a smile before mouthing ‘they’re insane!’ Felix sees and proceeds to nail him in the face with your favorite throw pillow.

“Says the guy who sleeps in socks-” Hyunjin throws the pillow back harshly, causing Chan to damn near pass out. It’s all that you can do to not roll over with laughter.

“My feet get cold.” He grumbles with a pout that makes both you and Minho coo from your spots beside the boy.

“Okay, okay, Minho just pick up the cards and let’s keep going? I’m about to finish!” The boy grumbles angrily, all ‘stupid card game’ and ‘I don’t wanna pick up twenty cards!’ You lock eyes with Chan from across the card pile, taking brief solace in the presence of someone else with a functioning brain.

“So we all know that (Y/n’)s about to win, and that she’s my best friend and favorite duet partner,” Everyone answers him with an immediate ‘rude,’ which makes a girlish giggle bubble up in your throat, “which is why it makes me so terribly sad to do this.” You watch closely as he dramatically pulls a card from his hand then places it on top of the deck, a fat draw four staring you straight in the eyes. Everyone goes silent while watching your face fall drastically.

“Hwang Hyunjin, I am going to-” The room bursts into chaos before you even finish the sentence. In the end there are about twelve fresh bruises, six entirely hoarse sets of vocal chords, and one demolished dorm room. Just a normal Friday night.

Except for the way that your heart stutters when Hyunjin mouths a simple ‘love you’ over the bustling group. That’s not normal, but you think that you like it.

“Hyunjin, if you keep your hands there I’m going to fall.” You say to your duet partner, whose hands are wandering aimlessly up your torso. They’re supposed to be on your hips, serving as an anchor for your body while it dips towards the ground.

“Sorry, sorry.” The boy mumbles, not entirely meaning it. It’s impossible to be sorry when he can physically feel your heart speed up beneath his hands.

“Try to sound just a little bit less convincing next time, okay?” You shimmy slightly in a futile attempt to move his hands, which only makes him laugh brightly. If it weren’t for your less than ideal position (halfway bent into a split with every ounce of your weight balanced on the tips of your toes,) you would hit him.

“Do you want me to drop you, because I can drop you if it’s what you want-” The teacher snaps her fingers, pulling everyone’s attention out of the various warm up routines and to the front of the room. Hyunjins hands pull away from your torso so quickly that it burns.

“No dropping dance partners on purpose, that’s the first rule of building stage chemistry.” She chastises, eyes brushing briefly over your friend which causes him to turn thirty shades of pink. You giggle quietly to yourself before sticking your tongue out at him, “But of course, you can’t truly start to build a connection until there’s material. So that’s what we’re doing today, I’ve assigned each group with a pas de deux, or ‘dance for two’. Whoever I think shows the most promise within the next week will be given the opportunity to enter in the regional competition.” She says opportunity, but the stern tone of her voice means that whoever she picks will definitely have to do the competition.

Everyone floods to the front of the class before she even finishes, Hyunjin moving to do so as well before you quickly grip his wrist.

“She didn’t say to go yet, and if we want to qualify for that competition we’re going to have to start kissing up now.” You keep your face forward, chin up and shoulders back, but even then you can feel Hyunjins smile, “What?!”

“You want to do the competition?” He sounds hopeful, nearly childlike.

“Of course! That’s like half the reason I go to school here, the competitive atmosphere.” People are starting to settle back into place, your teacher wearing a look of utter annoyance. Hyunjin doesn’t seem to notice, seeing as his mouth keeps moving.

“I’ve only known how to do a pirouette for a month, and I still can’t really get my double. You’d have a better chance with Han, or-” As soon as the teachers back is turned you whip around to your babbling partner, hands planted firmly on his broad shoulders. It takes a second for his eyes to meet yours, but when they do he nearly melts.

“I don’t want to do it with anyone else, I want to do it with you. And just because your double isn’t perfect doesn’t mean that it’s not good so stop stressing.” He looks down for a second, cheeks growing as pink as your shoes. By force of habit you hook a hand beneath the boys chin and force him to look at you, “I mean it.” He swallows harshly, then nods. With a sigh you let go of the boy and return to your previous (assigned) position. Just in time too, seeing as the teacher turns around right as you settle next to the boy.

“You may check your assignments at the end of class, if you haven’t done so already.” You flash a knowing glance to Hyunjin, almost as if to say ‘I told you so.’ He knows better than to argue.

At the end of class you go up to look with Jisung while Hyunjin gathers your things for you, the short brunette babbling excitedly about the previously mentioned regional’s.

“I thought that you don’t do partner work?” You tease lightly while ducking down to look at the list.

“I don’t, but neither does my partner! So we’ll just be okay at...” He bends next to, head full of brown hair hitting you straight in the eyes, “Romeo and Juliet?” You bite down a laugh while pushing the boy away.

“Don’t try to fight it, you’re such a Romeo. Just like I am such a... Lise!” The boys face contorts with jealousy as he ducks back down, once again knocking your heads together.

“You guys got La Fille mal gardee? And the ribbon dance?!” You giggle back a small yes while pinching the boys frowning cheeks, “No fair! Absolutely no fair, I have to do stupid Romeo and Juliet and you got my favorite ballet, no fair!”

“It’s my favorite too!” You defend, which ends up being pointless because both Hyunjin and Jisung chorus back with ‘not true!’

“Your favorite is swan lake.” Hyunjin states while sliding your dance bag onto your shoulder. Maybe it’s the fondness in his action, or the way that he named off your favorite ballet as though it was a fact ingrained into his brain, but your heart swells so large that you swear it could pop like a balloon.

“Okay,” you exhale, hand moving to the spot where his fingers were ghosting just seconds ago, “one of my favorites.”

At your first rehearsal for regionals you and Hyunjin are given the ribbon to use, seeing as it’s literally the ribbon dance. Practicing without it was honestly getting awkward, which is unfortunate seeing as the boy nearly got it taken away within minutes.

“Look (Y/n,) I’m a present!” He had exclaimed, causing you to whip around to the sight of your partner with a pink silk bow tied around his chin.

“Oh no, Hyunjin!” You whispered through a quiet laugh, moving towards him to untie it, “You are so ridiculous!”

“What? Am I not a gift?” He pouted while trying to pull your hands away, which earned him nothing but a harsh smack on the wrist. You slipped it off his face and behind your back just as the teacher walked in the door to give the ‘your ribbon is not a toy,’ talk.

At the second you describe the plot of La Fille mal Gardee, which proves to be slightly (read: very confusing.)

“Wait wait wait, she doesn’t even like the other guy?!” He asks while shaking his head cutely, black hair bouncing along with the motion. If it gets any longer he’s going to have to start putting it up.

“Nope, not one bit.” His eyebrows furrow as he starts to grumble ‘this is kind of stupid,’ earning a giggle and a push to the shoulder, “No it isn’t! It’s funny, and sweet! I really relate to Lise and her... Character arch I guess.”

“Isn’t she the girl who needed guarding or something like that?” His tilts to the side, teeth catching ever so slightly on his puffy pink lips.

“Yea,” You exhale with a quickening heart rate, “something like that.” There’s silence for a minute, nothing but Hyunjin shaking his head and sighing softly.

“That’s not you. No one needs to guard you.” For some reason your brain flashes back to the third summer alone (that awkward stage where you were too old to make new friends and too young to go see Jisung,) when you spent everyday walking through the woods alone. Sometimes you would just walk until the sun went down and your only company was the stars, but most days you would find a new place to sit down and hum out the motifs of your favorite ballets, “No one.”

For a moment you think that he’s right.

The fourth rehearsal (exactly one week after the first) is when you get to a stage kiss in the choreography, your teacher describing the motions along with a recording that’s projecting on the back wall. It starts with the boy pulling in the girl by the ribbon, then swooping down to meet her lips with a smile. Then she twirls away, leaving your skin hot and crawling.

“We’re um... A-are we gonna do that?” Hyunjin asks through a whisper, leaning close enough that you can feel his breath. It’s warm and smells like spearmint.

“We’ll know when we get there I guess, now pay attention!” You push his face away from yours and back to the projection, watching as the couple wraps each other up in the silky ribbon.

When you do finally get there an hour later he looks so nervous that he could puke. Your teacher shouts out the next move, ‘kiss and then twirl away,’ which only adds to the painful drumming of your heart.

“It’s okay, (Y/n,) you don’t have to.” His voice is low, hushed. Almost like he doesn’t want anyone else to hear.

“No, no! It’s okay, I’ll just...” You lean forward as much as you can with the ribbon hugging your waist and press a feather light kiss onto the tip of his nose. The teacher coos, maybe even praises the two of you on the developing stage chemistry. You don’t hear it. You don’t hear anything over the erratic beating of your heart, “I’ll just do that, okay?” He swallows dryly, eyes flashing quickly down to your lips then back up to your sweet gaze.

“Y-yea, perfect.” There’s something building up in the space between your bodies, so thick that you could spread it over toast, “You should twirl away, right?” You nod, wanting desperately to stay. To kiss him in an earth shattering way.

A part of you thinks that you shouldn’t. That Hyunjin has the power to ruin every part of you, and that wanting to give that to him after your hearts already been broken is foolish. But you do, you want to. Because loving Hyunjin feels good enough that the pain doesn’t matter.

After the fifth rehearsal the two of you feel as though you’ve torn every muscle in your body. Your teacher decided within the first twelve minutes that the two of you would benefit from some conditioning, which resulted in you and Hyunjin holding side by side planks (as well as other terrible positions) and muttering curses for a solid hour.

“I’m gonna collapse.” Hyunjin whines, plopping down onto the hardwood floor beside his dance bag. Something that’s probably supposed to be a laugh falls out of your mouth before you pull the water bottle from your bag.

“At least you haven’t been wearing pointe shoes all day.” You groan while moving the bottle to your mouth. A mouthful of water slides down your throat right as the boys face twists into one of horror.

“Oh gosh, oh no I’m so sorry!” You try to wave the black haired boy away, which only makes him feel worse, “No, no! I wanna help let me umm... Come back to my room? I can set up a foot bath with...”

“Epsom salts.” You answer after swallowing another swig of water, “But I have all of the stuff in my room, I can take care of it.” Hyunjin whines again while rolling over onto his stomach and pushing himself into a sitting position. There’s a bead of sweat dripping down the bridge of his nose, something that you shouldn’t focus on. It catches on the tip before falling delicately onto his collar bone.

“I wanna take care of it,” It feels like all of the air has been sucked out of the room, “just... Here, wear my jacket into the building so no one can see that you’re uh... A girl.” You try to argue again, but then your cheeks are squished in between his hand and his eyebrows are furrowed just enough for it to be cute, “Let me take care of you.”

And really, how could you say no to that?

“Hwang Hyunjin, you are my favorite person in the world.” You sigh, feet dipping into the warm cloudy water. He plops down next to you with a laugh and arms full of snacks.

“Can I get that in writing? You know, just to prove it to Jisung.” Laughter bounces off of his dorm walls, filling the boys brain with childhood memories. Like the time that you two were riding scooters in your driveway and just as the sun started to set you skinned your knee. Hyunjin had thought for a minute that the shaking of your shoulders was sobbing, but quickly discovered by a tilt of your chin and hands wrapped around your sides that you were indeed laughing. Beautiful, clear laughter complete with sunshine dripping from your skin. It was the first time he can remember thinking that someone was beautiful.

“Yes!” You exclaim, effectively pulling the boy from his memory, “But only if you give me food.” He giggles tiredly, a sound so sweet that it might as well be honey, and tosses a bag of pita chips your way.

“You don’t even have to ask.”

You’re supposed to go back to your dorm at eleven, thirty minutes after arrival. But then Hyunjin starts talking about anything and everything, ranging from how he met Minho to the old building of his school. The way he chuckles sleepily while reminiscing on water logged ceilings is enough to make you melt.

Somehow your head ends up pulled against his chest, rising and falling with his breaths. There’s an arm tied around your waist like ribbon, lips softly brushing your hairline as he mumbles endlessly about everything, your leg across his lap as though they’re supposed to be.

“What time’s it?” You slur, clenching onto the fabric of his shirt. It smells like spice and fresh pine and Hyunjin. So much like Hyunjin.

“Midnight.” You think to yourself that it’s time to leave, that if any of the staff found out about this you’d be dead. You also think that Hyunjin smells like fresh pine and that he’s holding you in a way that you’ve never been held.

The sound of his even breathing and the weight of his arms on you lulls you to sleep in a matter of minutes.

When you wake up it’s to the obnoxious blaring of Hyunjins alarm. The boy whines lowly before punching it into snooze. It’s enough to make you laugh, then pull your head away from the cradle of his chin.

“C’mon sleepy, it’s time to get up. What do you have for breakfast?” If it weren’t for your hair tickling his cheek or the way your torso writhes beneath his arm he would be annoyed by your chirping voice. After the hundreds of early mornings school has thrown your way you can’t really help but be a morning person.

“More sleep, that’s what I have.” He grumbles as you crack the curtains open, trying desperately to pull the comforter over his eyes.

“You need food to fuel your body Hyunjin-” Before you can finish lecturing him an arm shoots up from beneath the gray blanket, crashing your body onto his with a sleepy groan.

“M’ just kidding.” He pulls you under the blanket with him, mimicking the first time he spent the night at your house. You two stayed up until the sun was rising, hidden away from the world by the fluffy pink comforter of your childhood bedroom, “Protein bars are in the closet and apples’r on top of the mini fridge.

It’d be so easy to skip classes and stay here all day, not a care in the world besides the sweet boy that you’re currently tangled in. A part of you wants to melt away and give in, but a bigger part knows that doing that is a commitment. Like saying that you’re his to hold and break however he pleases. It’s the scariest thought that you’ve had in months.

“W-we should get going. Yea?” The words sound like you’ve been choking on them. A fact that Hyunjin takes notice of, eyes growing sad and attentive as his arms wiggle away from your waist.

“Yea, yea. Minho will be here in ten minutes, we walk to pas de deux together.” Before you can help it your expression turns panicked, eyebrows shooting up as your jaw drops open, “Sorry! He’s not gonna tell anyone or anything I promise!” Something clenches in your chest at the sight of him sitting up in bed, black hair sticking up every way that it can.

“I know he won’t, it’s just...” You look down at your body, clothed with Hyunjins sweatshirt and a pair of his long socks (turns out that he was onto something with the whole ‘sleeping in socks’ thing,) “I don’t want him to get the wrong idea.” His gaze shoots up to meet yours, so soft and relaxed that you could cry.

“Which would be?” There’s a pounding in your ears that’s quickly recognizable as a heartbeat.

“That we’re together.” It’s barely above a whisper, but Hyunjin hears you loud and clear. From the light tremble to the breathy finish, he hears you.

“We could be, if that’s what you want.” He puts a hand on your shoulder, an action familiar enough that it’s normal yet tender enough that your cheeks are flushing pink, “Is that what you want?”

“I-I, um...” Your heart is screaming yes, that you want to be his and only his. That while you aren’t a girl who needs to be guarded, you are a girl who wants to be guarded. Guarded from everything by Hyunjins thin comforter and strong arms.

But then you think about the promise that Hyunjin broke. The promise that he wouldn’t forget you, and then broke less than twenty-four hours later. You think about how badly you’ve wanted to spend the last day of summer with him every year since. Your mouth opens right as a knock sounds against his door, “Can we talk about this later?” Hyunjin nods lightly while getting up to grab two apples off of the top of the mini fridge.

“I’m so sorry for however he reacts.” The boy groans under his breath, offering you a light green apple along with an apologetic smile. You accept, smiling back before popping out of bed to pull your dance bag over your shoulder.

“It can’t be that bad, Minho’s level headed.” If it weren’t for the fact that Hyunjin still has a question lodged in his throat he would’ve laughed.

You’re the one who finally opens the door, interrupting Minho mid-knock. At first he looks aggravated, ready to launch into a long speech about how ‘timeliness is important’ and ‘you always fucking make us late’ but when his eyes meet you his jaw goes slack.

“What the f-”

If the sound of Minho screeching wasn’t telling enough, you were very very wrong.

The next four days are spent dancing around Hyunjins burning question, constantly talking about anything else or switching the topic when it seems like he might bring it up. At first he barely notices, simply assuming that you need time to mull it over, but then Jisung and Chan sit in on a lunchtime rehearsal.

The dance is coming along perfectly, so much so that the boys don’t even notice your hesitations. Hyunjin sees it though. Sees the way that your hands tremble before planting on his shoulders, the way that your face looks sad after pressing the soft kiss onto his nose. While he hasn’t seen you dance as much as Jisung or Felix probably have, he’s still seen enough to know that you’re never like this. Never uncertain.

“What was that about?” The boy asks after the rehearsal, hands crossed against his chest. You’re going to ignore him, focus on nothing other than getting out of your pointe shoes and off to your next class, but then his dark brown eyes catch on yours, “Seriously!”

“What are you talking about?” You respond, fingers working quickly to undo the ribbons around your ankles. A sigh leaves your mouth as one shoe slips off and into your bag, quickly moving to the other one before Hyunjin can continue the questioning.

Turns out that your friend is terrible at picking up on social cues.

“Don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about.” Your head is briefly pulled up from the floor as his voice grows impossibly soft, your heartbeat faltering ever so slightly. There’s a quiet goodbye as Jisung and Chan leave the studio, “Y-you scared me.”

“I’m sorry.” You whisper, throwing the second shoe into your bag while a lump takes form in your throat. If he wasn’t your best friend then he would think that you’re just tired, or hungry, or anything other than deflecting. But he is your best friend, who knows that being tired or hungry only makes you sad. Your best friend who knows that you’re deflecting harder than you ever have before.

“It’s okay, just tell me. Please.” His last word is so hushed that you can barely hear it, but it’s there. Light, and airy, and perfectly there, “Is this about what I asked?” Before you can help you’re nodding, once again giving this boy every part of you that can break.

“Yea, kind of.” It feels like your mouth is full of cotton, leaving you uncomfortably hot along with speechless. A loud sigh rings through the studio as Hyunjin slides down to meet your height, hands burying into his raven black hair. The sight takes you back to the last day of fifth grade; you and him holding each other on your front porch as if the world was ending, your hands tangled into his hair.

“Is it because you don’t want to?” There’s his eyes on yours, your chest heaving, and nothing else in the entire universe. Just (Y/n,) the girl who wants to be guarded, and Hyunjin, (Y/n’)s beloved.

“No.”

“Then why didn’t you say yes?” Right now feels like when you’re at a competition, in the middle of a variation that’s been giving you hell since you started working on it. It’s seconds before the hardest part, the one that you’re still not sure of. It’s the adrenaline rushing through your veins and the words ‘now or never’ echoing with each timed exhale.

“Because. How do I know that you won’t forget about me when summer comes?” Your words hit him like a punch to the gut, causing his lips to part and then heave for air.

“I-I never forgot about you.”

“Yes you did!” There are tears prickling the back of your eyelids, which you quickly blink away before continuing, “I waited for you outside your house every day! And then, when you wouldn’t show up, I-I’d spend every day alone. Doing what we used to do together, but by myself! I was all by myself and I missed you so much, Jinnie. So, so much.” He’s going to tell you that you’re wrong. That while all of those things happened, he never ever forgot about you.

But then there’s that old nickname, the one reserved specifically for family and you. He hasn’t heard it in months, and when he finally does it’s rolling out of your mouth like a plea soaked in honey. Something that’s going to stick with him for forever.

“(Y/n,) please-” You’re up and out of the door before he can even finish.

It’s a dreary Friday morning, rain trickling down your window and painting your room a gray shade of blue. With a deep inhale you realize that everything is finally smelling like fall, which only solidifies the fact that you never want to get out of bed. Unfortunately you have a class in half an hour that you do kind of need to go to.

But it’s not too terrible. Maybe if you were getting up to go take a math class, or run a marathon, but you aren’t. You’re getting up to go to ballet class, and you can wear your favorite leotard again (the light blue one, with pearls sewn around the collar,) and the rain outside is heavy enough to be calming but light enough that you can fend it off with an umbrella. The only thing that could make this morning any better is your favorite childhood breakfast, honey nut cheerios with strawberry milk.

Which is, oddly enough, sitting outside of your door when you open it to head off to the dining hall. A gallon sized jug of bright pink milk next to a family size box of your favorite cereal, just sitting in the middle of the hallway with a folded piece of paper resting precariously on top. Something about this has Hyunjin written all over it. You lean down to pick up the note, reading it about a thousand times over before rushing back into your room to wolf down the breakfast that you haven’t had in months.

‘(Y/n,)

I never forgot you.

Come to my room tonight after rehearsal. Please.

Sincerely, Hyunjin.’

When you two do the first full run through of the pas de deux that night he holds you extra tight. Maybe because he misses you. Maybe because he thinks that after tonight he’ll never have the chance to do so again.

But when he opens the door to his dorm room you see pink fluffy blankets folded on his bed. On top of them is a basket, filled to the brim with every last one of your favorite things. Strawberries dipped in chocolate like the ones your mother would make on hot summer nights, snickers bars like the ones that you two would share after days spent in your driveway, glass bottled lemonade like you would buy from the stand up the street.

“I may or may not have also bought your favorite movie. Well, if it’s still Barbie And the Twelve Dancing Princesses.” A giggle sounds through the room, bouncing around the walls and then back onto Hyunjins burning cheeks.

“It is, but don’t tell Jisung!” Rain starts to fall again, the soft pitter patter mixing perfectly with the boys soft laugh. His hand grazes briefly against the small of your back as he starts to guide you into the tight room, “I’m serious! Him and Lix will make fun of me!” The pout on your face is enough to melt anyone’s heart, which is why Hyunjin doesn’t even think twice when his knees go weak as jelly.

“My lips are sealed.” He says, walking over the boxy tv (that certainly wasn’t there last week) on his desk and inserting the disc, “Now sit back and enjoy.”

It’s not a hard request to fill, your tired body sinking immediately into the fluffy blankets and mouth watering each time you bite down on a strawberry. Rain continues to patter softly against the window, the sound occasionally being replaced by a loud roll of thunder which makes the boy next to you jump. You had laughed at the action, asking softly if he was scared. It was a rhetorical question, you know fully well that he’s always been scared of thunder.

“No! Yes, shut up.” And if you mind that the boy cuddles softly into your side, one arm wrapped around the curve of your waist while the other holds a chocolate strawberry, you don’t say so.

The two of you stay tangled up in each other like that until the credits roll, Hyunjins breathy sigh hitting your cheek as he shifts to get up. You watch with heartfelt eyes as he crosses the dimly lit room, his black hair briefly sweeping across his eyes. You want to reach up and push it away, but right as you manage to sit up straight he’s done with it and headed back to the bed. With a short laugh you realize that your noses are touching.

“Hi.” The word comes at as a short exhale, leaving a taste on your tongue that’s sweeter than chocolate strawberries.

“Hey.” Your heart flutters at the sound, an exhale laced together with a smile, as his arms return to their previous spot around your waist. There’s probably nothing in the world brighter than the smile he wears for you. Stage lights, the sun, every last star in the sky rolled into one. None of it even comes close to the way that his pink lips stretch perfectly from cheek to cheek, “Do you finally believe me?” He brings up a hand to caress your cheek gently, as though to rub away tears that haven’t fallen.

“Believe wh-”

“Do you believe that I never forgot you? That I never forgot any of you, not even the little things like your favorite color or what you liked to eat for dinner. Maybe I pulled away, but I think it’s because even then I knew how badly losing you would hurt. I-I knew that I never wanted to lose you, which is just what I did...” He swallows harshly, tongue darting out to wet his lower lip, “But I’ll never do it again. I’ll never lose you, and I’ll never forget you a-and... And I don’t want to remember you anymore, (Y/n.) I’m so done with remembering, let’s just be.” There’s something stuck in your throat, but it doesn’t hurt the way that tears do. No, this is a release gathering inside of you. One that’s waiting for you to finally give in.

“Hyunjin,” His fingers cradle the curve of your jaw, sending goosebumps down every inch of your body, “kiss me.” And that’s all the confirmation he needs to brush his lips over yours.

At first it’s gentle, almost questioning. Like he’s asking one last time ‘Is this okay?’ But then your hands tangle in his black hair, the way that they’ve been aching to since you first saw him, and he knows that you’re okay. More than okay, you’re in love. With every muscle in your body, you’re in love.

Hyunjin’s hand that was previously holding your face drops back down to your waist and pulls you in softly. They then travel down to your thighs, eliciting a soft gasp from your lips before he picks you up and guides you onto the bed. Every movement is so perfect yet raw, feeling like the stuff of ballets. Until your back hits an unopened glass bottle of lemonade, that is. The sudden cold is enough to make you jump.

“What?!” Hyunjin questions, eyes shooting as wide as saucers, “Did I hurt you?!” A laugh sounds through the room while your hand detaches from his hair, opting instead to reach around your body and remove the glass bottle that’s poking you in the least conventional way possible.

“No.” You answer through soft giggles, bringing up the bottle to lightly tap his forehead, “There’s just a lemonade poking me in the ass.”

He flushes bright pink before answering with a tiny ‘oh’ and burying his face into the crook of your neck. If you were less malleable you would’ve teased him even more, but then there are warm kisses on your skin and nothing in your head.

“I love you.” He whispers, head slowly moving until his lips are against your jaw. You’re going to answer, really, but then there are soft lips on your chin and a smile ripping through your body, “I love you.”

“M-me too.” You stammer dumbly, body going entirely limp as he (finally) presses another kiss onto your lips. The boy pulls away entirely too soon, but it’s okay. There’s something that you need to finish saying, anyways, “I love you too, Jinnie.”

When you fall asleep that night it’s to the sound of pattering rain, with Hyunjins arms guarding you from the world.

The bus back from regionals is quiet, the few sounds that do come about being Chan and Felix whispering softly or Minho giggling at Jisung snoring. You’re about there too, but who can blame you when Hyunjins hands are buried in your hair (which is both stiff and wavy from a combination of hairspray and braided buns.) If you close your eyes and focus really hard you can even feel the rise and fall of his chest where it’s connected with your back.

“Who’s gonna keep our trophy?” The boy questions, lips moving softly against the shell of your ear. It generates a warm feeling in your gut, one that spreads quickly to your cheeks and ears.

“We’ll trade it off on the weekends. Like divorced soccer parents.” He giggles softly, moving forward to kiss your temple.

“Are you trying to tell me something?” If you were a little bit less tired, or a little bit less in love, then maybe you’d joke back. But you’re wrapped up in him like a ribbon on your waist, foot nudging against a plastic first place trophy while his lips move against you in a way that you could get drunk off of.

“Never.” You answer, hand coming up to wrap around his as if it were a vow, “Never.”

#hwang hyunjin #hyunjin x reader #hyunjin fluff #hyunjin angst #writekpop #admin reid #han jisung #lee felix #bang chan #lee know #stray kids #stray kids fluff #stray kids x reader #this might be one of my favorites yet... i really loved writing all of them #and researching!!

233 notes · View notes

writtenonreceipts · 4 years

Note

Will you write a part 2 of a chain, a box, a lie where they get back together?

Fixed it for you, sorry to leave you hanging for so long. Part One is here.

May still be a bit angsty. I’m not sure how I feel about this one but oh well….at least I didn’t go with the version where someone had to die to get them back together. Seriously, I wrote three different versions of how this would go aaaaand still not satisfied with it... enjoy?

Fools in Love

The bed was too large. Too large, too cold, too empty.

Aelin rolled onto her side and glanced at the alarm clock barely visible amid a pile of books, chocolate wrappers, and tissues. Cold red letters blared back at her.

7:54 am.

It took her a few minutes to orientate herself and try to remember what had woken her up. It wasn’t until her phone gave a second loud chirp that she realized some idiot was texting her so early on a Saturday.

Groaning, Aelin fumbled for her phone. Unfortunately, her morning coordination was crap and she ended up knocking it to the ground with a clatter.

At her feet, Fleetfoot gave a loud huff and shifted until her paws were digging into Aelin’s calves. The puppy behaved like a temperamental teenager more often than not.

By the time she found her phone on the ground, Aelin knew she wasn’t going back to bed. Instead, she rubbed her eyes and stuffed her feet in her slippers. Fleetfoot remained blissfully asleep as Aelin shuffled into the kitchen.

Damn dog.

Aelin stretched as she put on the tea pot for some tea and was about to open her phone to read the texts when someone knocked at her door. She froze. Who the hell?

She had a pistol stashed in a safe in her room, but that seemed too far away. Aelin did the only logical thing she could think of grabbed her cast iron skillet settled on the kitchen counter. No one she knew would be up this early. Not even her landlord.

Aelin opened her phone ready to dial the police when she saw the texts.

>>Can we talk?

>>Please?

Another knock came at the door.

Aelin cursed as she kept her grip on the skillet. Even if she hadn’t seen the texts or seen his name, she should have known. Just to be safe she looked through the peephole. Once again, standing just outside her door was Rowan. Once again, looking like hell.

She knew she would regret it, but Aelin locked her phone and slid the chain from off the door. As she eased the door open, Aelin could see the surprise register on Rowans face that she’d actually woken up to his texts. Let alone come and open the door to him. But that wasn’t what surprised her. It was how bloodshot his eyes were. It was the circles brewing beneath those eyes and how that intensely passionate gleam had been snuffed out.

“Rowan,” she whispered. His name on her lips was hard to hear. She felt her heart cinch painfully at it, but figured cursing at him wouldn’t be helpful.

The man merely stared at her as he leaned against the door jam. It wasn’t raining, which was a small blessing, so he was dry this time. But his hair was still a mess, his clothes still rumpled.

He merely stared at her with tired eyes and a tired body. It seemed to be a miracle that he was still standing.

“I didn’t text you back.” She couldn’t keep her own exhaustion from her voice as she spoke.

Rowan exhaled sharply and cursed. “I know. I’m sorry, I was already on my way over here and I wasn’t thinking and—” He let himself trail off. A small spark of hope flickered in his eyes. “You can tell me to get out when ever and I’ll listen.”

It took her a moment, but Aelin finally nodded and stepped aside. “Come in.”

Rowan did. And as he stepped around her, he noticed the skillet she still held.

“Are you going to beat me with that?” he asked.

She scowled at the amusement in his voice. “I’m thinking of it, considering you woke me up at eight in the morning. On a Saturday.”

He at least at the decency to look abashed.

A part of her wondered if she was being stupid to let this happen. To let him in and either talk or stare or yell. Whatever they ended up doing it was stupid. But then…they were adults. She was twenty-five and he was twenty-eight. They could be in the same room together. They needed to be in the same room together. Their friend group had merged into one giant conglomerate that they had to get used to one another again.

The apartment was silent as she shut and locked the door behind him. Aelin didn’t bother looking at him as she headed back to the kitchen and set the skillet back on the counter. The tea pot began to sputter but Aelin was feeling like she needed something far stronger now.

Running a hand through her hair she looked back to Rowan. He was still standing in the middle of the entry way hands in his pockets. His leather jacket was open displaying a graphic t-shirt from some grunge band they’d discovered together.

Despite everything, he still looked good. Aelin hated him for it. She turned away and started her coffee machine. Tea would wait for another time.

“What do you want to talk about Rowan?” she asked. Steeling herself, Aelin turned back to face him. She leaned against the kitchen counter, ready to lunge for the skillet if need be. She knew however Rowan wouldn’t hurt her. She just wanted to make sure she would be able to cause some damage if he pissed her off enough.

He ran a hand through his hair and looked anywhere but at her.

It stung. That reaction. She knew she’d broken his heart. She’d broken her own too. But it was better. It was better to walk away from those feelings because honestly, who the hell would want her around for so long? It was only a matter of time before the ball would drop and they would both realize how strange and deranged their relationship was. Ten months be damned.

“We never talked about what happened, Aelin,” he said. Finally, he locked eyes with her. Aelin looked away quickly. She still got shivers hearing him say her name. So carefully, so gently.

“We did—” she tried to speak, but Rowan cut her off.

“And I don’t mean the fight we had and the words we threw at each other,” he said. His words cut right over hers with some of the same passion he’d once had. Aelin couldn’t bare to see if his eyes were just as bright. “I mean about what happened with us.”

It was Aelin’s turn to look anywhere but him. She focused on the space behind him, to the wall where she used to keep a framed picture of them together. It was tucked beneath her bed because she’d been up most of last night crying over it. But she would not admit to that. It was her fault after all that they’d broken up.

“I just want to talk.” He sounded helpless enough that Aelin had to look at him. His eyes were desperate, almost pleading as he looked at her. The usual short hair cut he had was growing out enough that his bangs flopped in his face making him appear younger than he really was.

“We did talk,” Aelin said. She ran a hand through her hair and silently cursed herself. She was wearing his damned shirt like an idiot. Hell, she couldn’t have put on a sweatshirt?

“Aelin,” Rowan said exasperated. Whenever he got frustrated like this he began pacing and today was no exception. He didn’t walk towards her, but rather to the couch and back, his footsteps heavy on the floor. “I want to talk about us. I want to talk about how you told me that you could do this anymore and that it was over. And nothing else. What am I supposed to do with that? How am I supposed to get over you based on that?”

The back of her eyes burned, but Aelin wouldn’t let him see her tears. She’d cried enough over this the past several weeks. Talking about it wouldn’t help. Talking about it would only reveal the truth and the truth was an ugly, wretched thing.

“I need coffee,” she muttered.

Without looking up, she went to the coffee pot and pulled a cup to the brim. She took a long sip without her usual additives. All she really needed was the rush of caffeine. Something to clear her head and help her think. The bitter roast of the coffee beans certainly helped with that. Who the hell drank a blend this dark?

As soon as she had the thought, she realized that this must have been left over from Rowan’s stash that he’d kept here.

Aelin cursed and set the cup aside. “So, I’m supposed to be responsible for why you can’t move on? I’m responsible for your own misery?”

She knew of course that it was her fault. She loved him and still ended it. She loved him and still walked away.

“Ten months together Aelin,” Rowan said. He stopped pacing now and stepped toward her. “I deserve more than that. We deserve more than a few sentences and shouted words. I have to believe that.”

There was too much Aelin wanted to say. Too much she could say. But saying it wouldn’t make any of this better.

Scrubbing a hand over her eyes and the tears forming there, Aelin faced him full on. “We were working so much, too far apart and…and I just couldn’t…we just—”

“We just weren’t good together?” he finished for her, a disbelieving sort of smile on his mouth.

Even though he didn’t know those were the same words she’d pretended she would say to him—it still cut her to the core to hear them. We’re just too good together.

Her lip wobbled.

“You were never good at being honest with me,” Rowan observed, “even at our best, I always knew you were holding something back. Keeping something hidden.”

Aelin had to bite down on her lower lip, but she knew it was too late, knew he could already see her breaking.

In the living room, the infomercials continued to play. Aelin could think back to one day early on in their relationship when she’d taken a sick day because her period had been miserable and she could barely move. Rowan had come over as soon as she’d texted him that she wasn’t feeling well. He’d come fully prepared with a heating pad, chocolate, and ice cream. They spent the day on her couch watching these same stupid infomercials. Laughing over the poor acting, the strange products. Simply together.

Aelin swallowed stiffly. “Rowan,” she began, her voice sounding wounded to her own ears that she needed to pause. Because how could any of this be made better? How could she take back what she said? How could they come back from this?

“Can you blame me for being scared?” she finally said. The words weren’t the ones she really wanted to say but as soon as they were out, she couldn’t stop. “Scared of everything about us, about you? I’m terrified by how I feel about you, how I’ve always felt about you. Because I’ve never…I don’t…”

Aelin trailed off uselessly. There was no stopping the tears in her eyes, falling down her cheeks. Between Sam and Chaol and a brief interlude with Dorian—the raw all-consuming emotions that she had with Rowan were utterly new and different. And she wasn’t lying when she said she was terrified of it. She was so, so tired of lying. Even if it led to more misery.

Aelin didn’t notice when he came towards her. She barely registered it through her tears until he was right before her, his hands ghosting trails up her arms, slow and careful. When he began wiping the tears from her cheeks, Aelin nearly yanked away from him. Or fell into his arms. She didn’t know which.

Which was worse? The weakness of him seeing her like this? Or the weakness of being a sobbing wreck?

“Fireheart,” Rowan whispered. So close. He was close enough that she could smell him. That glorious scent of pine and snow mixed with the fresh tang of sunlight. One of his hands moved to cup her chin, tilting her face up just enough to look directly into her eyes.

Through her tears, Aelin could make out the concern on his face. She could just see the twisted frown of his lips, the pained look of his eyes. That look sent a pulse of her own pain through ever nerve in her body. Aelin shivered and squeezed her eyes shut.

“I’ve never been more scared in my life,” Rowan said to her silence. Her eyes flew open at the words and locked onto his gaze. “Everything about you, Fireheart, terrifies me. I keep finding another reason to fall in love with you. I keep finding another reason to want to be with you. And I know enough about you past and the other men in your life to get why you’re scared.”

He paused, his eyes flicking away from hers for just a moment.

“But,” he continued, “I’m not them. And I don’t want to leave you. I don’t want to run when things get hard. I’ve always loved you. And I always will.”

The admission sent a rush of warmth through Aelin. Damn him. Damn this man before her who knew everything about her and loved her still for it. She could hear it in his words, the tremble of his voice. How sincere he was.

His hands still cupped her face and Aelin reached up to grip his wrists with her hands, desperate to keep him there. Releasing a shaky breath, Aelin, bowed her head and stepped closer until her forehead bumped into his chest.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered. She looked up at him ready again to apologize and say something else about what an idiot she was.

Rowan however, kissed her.

His lips were soft, a whisper against hers. And much like his words from when he first came in, the touch echoed the same sentiment. I’ll leave if you ask.

Screw that.

Aelin surged on her toes and kissed him with greater force. She ran her hands up his arms, cupping his neck and pulling him closer, closer. Because really, she was a fool to have let him go in the first place.

When Rowan pulled back, Aelin was more than ready to follow him, the heady need in her body not yet satiated. The cocky smile growing on Rowan’s mouth though almost had her smacking him.

He sobered though. “I’m sorry, too.” She furrowed her brow at him and he continued. “For throwing too much at you, for not talking sooner and making sure you were okay with what I was asking.”

Aelin curled her fingers in the hair at the nape of his neck. She pressed her forehead against his and breathed deeply. The words were on the tip of tongue. Words that had felt like acid on her tongue for weeks now.

“Rowan,” she said, enunciating ever syllable, “I love you.”

He smiled a heart-breaking smile as he looked down at her. He paused a moment, his hands running down to the hem of the shirt she wore.

“Is this my shirt?”

Aelin gave him a blank look. “You’re still not getting it back.”

“That’s fine by me,” he said and kissed her again.

Gah. Hope this heals your wounded hearts, dears. Not my fave, but oh well…

I’ve got another ask that is giving me a hard time, but I promise to the anon who sent it in, I am working on it. I’m going to work on my Cursebreaker fic next and hopefully have something ready soon.

As always, my ask box and messages are always open for whatever, prompts or just to talk. Thanks y’all.

tags:

@tottenhamboys20 @morganofthewildfire @aelinchocolatelover @more-espresso-less-depresso-xx @bamchickawowow @ladywitchling @ireallyshouldsleeprn @courtofjurdan @sassys-world @sleeping-and-books @superspiritfestival @chieflemming @aelinfeyreeleven945tbln

#aelin and rowan #rowan whitethorn #rowaelin au #aelin galathynius #rowaelin #throne of glass #throne of glass fanfiction #throne of glass fanfic #throne of glass au #fanfiction #prompts #asked #asnwered #anon

74 notes · View notes

apocalypsewriters · 3 years

Text

The Aftermath of Brownies

A/N: I would recommend reading this post first, since it inspired me to rewrite this piece, but if you don't, here's the breakdown.

Victor-Hecate had trouble sleeping due to being touch starved because of their powers for six years, so their queerplatontic partner, Tora, baked lactose free brownies with him and watched a movie together until VH fell asleep

Also! A million thanks to my amazing friend @pagesofcursive for editing and inspiring this piece.

Warnings: brief mention of death (because it's Tae, and they can't be there without it) and let me know if there's anything I missed

Summary: Victor-Hecate can feel people's death when he touches people, but their partner, Tora doesn't affect them as much in short term. What happens when they fall asleep on her?

Tora finished the movie alone, brownie stuck in her teeth, leg numb underneath her, a sleeping person on her shoulder, and a hand tangled in her own. She groaned softly, extracting her leg and stretching it out in front of her. Victor-Hecate, or, as she typically called them, Vaytch, had fallen asleep with twenty-five minutes left in the movie and was now drooling a little onto Tora's pajama shirt. She didn't mind. It was worth it to make sure he got sleep, something he struggled with often but was working to fix. Starving herself of physical contact for six years had taken a toll on Vaytch, leaving them jittery, stressed, and exhausted from sleepless nights. Tora often snuck up on them playfully to make both of them laugh, but sometimes they startled even when that wasn't Tora's intention.

With a sigh, she flicked off the TV, tossing the remote remorselessly onto the table with a clatter that echoed around the house. Gently, after laying eyes on Vaytch's softly snoring form and making her typical split-second decisions, Tora lifted them off her shoulder and deposited their head into her lap. Her curls tickled her legs, clad in pajama shorts. Tora sprung a ringlet or two around her finger before gazing mournfully at a book at the other arm of the couch. Wonder was a book heavily recommended (read: forced) to her by the other two of her dynamic trio- her partner, Vaytch, and Lynn. Her fingers tapped frantic rhythms on the couch for what felt like half an hour but must have only been a few moments before that distraction wasn't enough. She twisted a strand of her cropped hair over and over, tugging at it until that patch of her scalp held a dull ache. Tora drew in the short fur of the couch, keeping her movements small to ensure Vaytch wouldn't be disturbed. She needed sleep. Desperately. Tora couldn't afford to wake them. But her mind skittered around, frustration building at being trapped, even if by her own means and an adorable cage. Still, she couldn't move. She wouldn't move. She shouldn't move for selfish reasons.

However, glancing at the clock to see only seven minutes had passed since the end of the movie, she gave up. Leaning and stretching, trying and failing not to shift the sleeping head in her lap, she snagged the book. Triumphantly, Tora returned to her spot on the couch, only to find Vaytch's head lolling off of it at an extremely uncomfortable angle. They didn’t stir. Strange. Maybe he was more tired than she thought. Mentally shrugging, she gingerly lifted their head back into her lap, smoothing some stray curls back into place. She stroked their cheek apologetically, barely feeling his breath on her hand.

Wait.

Freezing in place, Tora pricked up her ears, trying to hear her partner’s snoring. It was generally pretty consistent, she’d learned from her own sleepless nights spent with them, but now there was eerie silence. Cold panic shot through her. What was going on? The fuzz of the couch made quiet, vague ripping noises as she dragged her fingers in short bursts rapidly along it. Critical information tickled the back of her brain. Tora always forgot the important things when they were necessary. Desperately, she tried to pursue the swiftly fading memory as it slipped from her fingers like water through a sieve.

To shake the unease resting like a dead weight in her chest, Tora picked up her book again with a small grimace, hoping that by distracting herself, the wild thought would return from the overgrown, chaotic mass of her mind and come into clarity. Absently, she appreciated the weight in her lap, pushing her fingers through ringlets. Vaytch never stayed this long on her, generally taking breaks now and then. It was a nice change. Tora sighed and laid back, soaking in her presence, his warmth, simply enjoying their company. She was so glad they had found each other, that Vaytch could touch another person without hurting. Numb was better than hurt in Tora's experience. It truly was lucky that Tora just made her numb; nothing bad came from it. She paused in her rippling through of book pages - the sound was nice - as a revelation struck.

Vaytch had never spent this much time on her because periodically they pushed away. She pushed away from Tora's touch, saying they needed to take a break. They took time to recuperate, saying he felt lightheaded after too long, that the emptiness echoed in her bones. How long was too long? The question shook Tora as she frantically wracked her brain again. Twenty minutes? Her eyes darted around the room, checking for the time.

It had been sixteen minutes since she last checked the clock. Spending precious time slipping up with the simple addition, she finally figured it had been about ten minutes short of an hour since Vaytch fell asleep. Easily over an hour since they took a break.

She gripped their wrist, feeling for a pulse. Nothing. Wait, wait... there! Vaytch's pulse was still there, albeit agonizingly slow.

Tora extricated herself from underneath the sleeping form, simultaneously trying to get out as fast as possible while still being delicate with Vaytch. She slid onto the floor while tossing the book away, catching herself with a hand on the cold floor. Was Vaytch's arm at an odd angle? Hesitantly, Tora adjusted it, keeping her hand away from bare skin. Now it looked worse, and she let out a curse. Tora desperately pulled Vaytch's arm out, letting it flop down and bounce against the side of the couch. She bit back a scream of frustration. Holding only the long sleeve so as to not touch Vaytch's skin, Tora lifted his arm and tucked it into his side, her fingertips briefly brushing the back of their hand. She flinched away immediately, wincing as her movement roughly jostled their seemingly peaceful form.

Switching from biting the inside of her cheek to her lip, Tora sat crisscrossed in front of the couch. Seconds crawled by as aches grew on her hunched back and furrowed brows. "Vaytch." Her voice was soft, scratchy from lack of use. Her throat rasped as she coughed to clear it. "Vaytch." Tora cringed at the desperation in her voice. Forgetting the more extreme movements that had yielded no result, Tora gently shook their shoulder, willing for them to wake up, to open his eyes and spite her fading hope. "You have to wake up now. This really isn't funny." Tears sprung to her eyes, and she raised her voice to combat the sob building in her throat. She was almost shouting, "Tae, you're not touching me anymore," Tora almost shouted. "You're fine. If you're not fine, Vi will kill me." She laughed weakly, incredulously at the situation she put Vaytch in. It was Tora's fault she was passed out, not waking up, heartbeat slow, too still to be considered normal. "Your brother probably would too." This was all Tora's fault. How could she let this happen? She ran her fingers hard through her hair, leaving her scalp stinging. "Ple-ase," Tora begged. She gripped her own arm tightly but could barely feel it. "You can't leave me. You were just starting to- to get better. I was never supposed to hurt you. Why-" She bit back a sob. How awful would it be for Vaytch if he woke up, probably in pain, to see Tora crying pathetically on the floor?

Itching for something to do as panic still clawed at her, Tora heaved herself to her feet. Shaking her legs awake, she walked a lap around the coffee table. She washed and dried the brownie pan - taking longer than she should as she got sidetracked filling up the dish soap, then the hand soap in the kitchen and bathroom - before returning to sit in front of her partner.

After switching her seated position three times, she finally settled. Somewhat. Rocking side to side slightly, her thumb and pinky vibrated back and forth on her knee. It had been - Tora glanced at the clock - eight minutes since she'd stepped away. The beautiful sound of Vaytch's snoring had begun to return, which was music to Tora's ears. "Vaytch," she whispered to herself. She strangled the urge to stroke their cheek comfortingly, worrying it would halt their recovery. "Vaytch, please." Tora was louder this time as she zeroed in on his sleeping form, willing her to wake up.

Miraculously, after two more painfully slow minutes of Tora's constant shifting, Vaytch's eyelids flickered. Tora leaned forward in anticipation, almost falling on top of them but catching herself just in time. She released a huff of air, not realizing she'd been holding her breath. Tora swayed, lightheaded, and threw her hand out to stabilize herself, rattling the coffee table in the process. The sound reverberated around the room as she cringed, her chin tilted down.

"Babe?"

Tora's head snapped up, almost giving herself whiplash. Vaytch's eyelids were still semi-stuck together as they blearily tried to focus on her. "Thank goodness you're awake!" The words came out in a louder than intended, slurred together rush.

His expression was baffled, a fold in the sofa imprinted on their cheek. "What?"

"Well, you weren't waking up, and I was so worried, and I called your name, and you were still asleep, and it's all my fault and-"

Vaytch reached out and stilled Tora's wildly gesturing hands, propping themself up on an elbow. Their eyebrows were pushed together in such a way that Tora wished she could push them apart, the way she always did when they were stressed. "What are you talking about? Are you okay?"

Tora gulped and fruitlessly tried to gather her thoughts together in a coherent way. "I'm fine now," she said, her voice full of relief. "You just fell asleep on top of me, and you lay there for too long so you weren't snoring anymore, and your heartbeat was slow, and you didn't react when I shook you, and then I remembered that you'd never stayed on me that long 'cause you said even numb would get too much, so I was really worried, but then-" Tora broke off, finally taking a deep, shuddering breath. "Then you finally woke up. Are you feeling okay??" she asked, offering Vaytch a hopefully comforting smile.

"Now that you mention it, I am kind of sore," Vaytch said. "Almost like everything fell asleep." Wrinkling her nose adorably, they released Tora's hands and sat up, rubbing their legs. He held out a hand and, once Tora accepted it, pulled her onto the couch beside her and placed the clasped hands between them. They rubbed the back of her hand with a thumb comfortingly. "It's very sweet that you were worried about me. But I'm okay now. Really," they said reassuringly in response to Tora's disbelieving expression. "I've been through worse, so it'll be fine. Seriously," they said with a snort, "you should have seen what happened when I met Juni and Bella."

Tora chuckled weakly as she remembered hearing about that. Sensing Tora's skepticism at their well-being, Vaytch held out her arms. Not needing another invitation, Tora launched herself into their embrace, knocking him backward, taking care to avoid any skin-to-skin contact. Vaytch squeaked as she squeezed. Tora felt overcome with gratefulness that he was still there to hug her back. She smiled into their shoulder, finally relaxed after half an hour of worry. Vaytch was okay. Everything was going to be okay.

#hehe. angsty #victor-hecate #tora #fusion au #tw: death mention #writeblr #writing #original character #writers on tumblr #writers #qpr

10 notes · View notes

the-avengers-ate-my-tongue · 4 years

Text

I’ll Be Ready

Summary: You’re tired of living with the ghost of Hannibal Lecter between you and Will after the infamous cannibal killed Abigail Hobbs and almost killed Alana and him, disappearing afterwards. Will sees some of the darkness he brought in you, and he couldn't help to think maybe it's his fault.

Pairing: Will Graham x reader

Warnings: angst, pregnant!Reader

Word count: 2375

I entered the kitchen, my baby bump heavy as an anvil. I held the bottom of the bump while I poured myself some coffee with the other hand, breathing hard. It wasn't far, now. Two more weeks. Two more weeks to see the apple of my eye, the little person I already loved the most. It was a strong connection, so strong it scared me sometimes, to love someone I hadn't even seen yet. I carefully drank a few sips of the strong, black and hot liquid, moaning low in pleasure. Damn, good coffee. Will makes the best coffee. Strong, tasteful. Just as I liked.

He was sitting in his armchair, his eyes blank while he drank his coffee. I sighed, walking to the living room and avoiding the dogs so I wouldn't step in any of them since I could barely see the floor because of the bump.

“A penny for your thoughts?” I asked, bringing him back of his reverie, sitting at the arm of the armchair. He caressed my bump, still a little drifted away.

I knew what he was thinking about. He had that look on his face. The blank, empty look that made shivers bite the back of my neck.

He was thinking about Hannibal Lecter.

“Will…” I lifted his chin with my finger so he could stare at me. Every time I realized the glow in his eyes no longer existed, that made me want to cry. His eyes seemed opaque, cold. “Please, stop thinking about him. You promised you would let him go. We can't live our lives with the ghost of Hannibal Lecter among us.”

There were no words to define and describe how much I hated Hannibal Lecter. How much I loathed him for what he put Will through in the last months, the prison, the trials. How it hurt to see Will behind those bars as if he was some cold-blooded murderer. In addition of all that, Hannibal killed Abigail Hobbs and almost killed him and Alana. I almost had a miscarriage when I found out, and all because of him. All because of that monster. Will took a lot of time to recover, could barely enjoy the pregnancy. Every time I thought about that man near my daughter, I felt so much ire that my face would turn hot and bright red, I would close my hands so hard my nails would hurt my palms and I just didn't feel like myself. That was the most animalistic feeling I've ever experienced in my whole life, and I… Truth is, I wanted Hannibal Lecter gone. Because he wasn't gone yet. Not with Will keeping him present with his thoughts. I could feel his presence, a black aura making the air cold and heavy. Sometimes when I was alone in my room and thought about Lecter coming back to hurt us, I would gasp for air, I would try to cry, but I couldn't bring up any tears. I didn't cry anymore. Something in me was different. Something broke that night Will almost died. I wouldn't let that monster near my baby. Ever.

Will seemed surprised, and looked at me, trying to read my face. Currently, every time he would try to read me he showed this confused and sad look on his eyes, but soon tried to hide it, like I was a damaged doll that could never be mended. That would break my heart even more. To think I was so damaged I was beyond repair.

“You know I couldn't do that even if I wanted to” Will said in a husky voice, avoiding my eyes. “I feel like… I'm Janus and Hannibal is my other face. He's my past, my present…”

He stopped talking, and I felt my mouth dry. I couldn't believe it.

“And your future?” I asked abruptly, getting up and standing in front of him “Is that what you want to say to me? He's your future?”

He didn't answer, clenching his jaw. I covered my face with my hands for a few seconds, and he might have thought I was crying, but I started to laugh. A creepy, cold laugh that made my chest vibrate.

“I have to find him, Y/n. It's up to me. I have to end this.”

“What do you have to end, Will? Him? Or us?” I felt my nails hurting inside my hands again, but I didn't stop pushing them. “It's what you've always wanted. Him. You've always wanted to go with him.”

“You don't understand. No one does.” He replied, his eyes staring at the floor.

“You better have the guts to look me in the eyes while you say you're leaving me to play serial killer with that, that… That thing.” I snorted, pulling my hair back. Will slowly raised his eyes to look at me, as if he had all the time in the world to do so. He got off the armchair, staring at me, so close he could kiss me. I could feel his breath touching my mouth, but I didn't back down, I kept staring at him. I felt hurt. Betrayed. And I wanted him to see that. All that heartache. How much it was tearing me apart. I felt the baby move in my bump; certainly, she was feeling something was wrong. I took his hand, putting in my bump so he could feel it.

“If you leave, Will… If you leave to find that monster, I assure you, you will never see us again. And if somehow you find us, if you bring that thing with you, if you dare to put my daughter at risk… I will…”

I couldn't say the words. I knew I was crossing a line that had no point of return. I could see in his eyes he was heartbroken as well, all the coldness vanishing.

“What are you going to do, Y/n?” He held my shoulders, his touch so soft I sighed. “What?”

I clenched my jaw, staring so deep in his eyes he might had thought I was staring at his soul.

“I will kill him. If you bring that monster near my daughter, I will kill him and whoever dares to try to stop me. Because I won't allow him to hurt anyone I love anymore. You want to go after him, follow him like a pet?” I practically spitted the last word in a sarcastic tone “Be my guest. Leaving us is your choice. But I'll be gone, Will. I'll disappear from the face of the earth. You will never see us again. And I will repeat, if in any case you find us, and you bring that thing near my daughter, I'll bring hell to him. I'll do what you couldn't, what Jack couldn't, what Alana couldn't. I will kill him.”

I felt my lips retracted, showing my teeth in a savage look. And at that moment, I knew he could see it. The void. The rage. The black spot Hannibal left in me. He thought he could keep me away from all that darkness, but it found a home in me as well. I knew I would do anything in my power to protect my child, and he knew that too, now.

“I love you, Will. Madly. Deeply. But I can't watch you destroy yourself. I won't. I won't allow that darkness to steal my baby's innocence. She will know only kindness and protection. Always. As much as I can provide her.” My voice was cracking as I said those words, knowing they wouldn't make him stay. Will's eyes were filled with tears.

“I can't give you what you need right now, Y/n. There isn't much left for me to reach.” He kissed my forehead, stepping away from me. I knew he didn't love me enough to stay. And that hurt more than anything at that moment.

An excruciating pain in my womb made me curve my body, holding my bump. Shit.

“Y/n?” Will helped me, holding me by the waist. I stepped away, getting rid of his touch, touching the wall to sustain myself. I started to breathe hard. It wasn't the time yet! I still had two more weeks.

“It's the baby.” I said, holding the bottom of my bump. The pain stopped for a few seconds, coming back in a moment seeming to be even worse. I growled, clenching my teeth “The baby is coming. The baby.”

Will didn't even hesitated, taking the car keys from the table. My suitcase was already packed for the hospital, so I just put it in the car, waiting for him. I was wearing a dress, thank God, and he went inside to grab me a coat.

One more wave of pain, and this time, I felt a warm liquid run through my legs. I cursed in a low voice as Will left the house, closing the door with my coat in his shoulder.

“Hurry, I think my water just broke” I said. “We might need a towel or something so I won't mess the car up.”

He stopped walking when he looked down my legs, his eyes wide.

“No time for that, Y/n. You're bleeding.” He rushed me to get inside the car, and I felt my heart skip a few beats. No. No, please God, don't let me lose my baby. I tried to stay calm because I knew it would be worse for her if I didn't but, after a long time, I felt my eyes wet. I closed them for a few seconds, and tears wet my face.

Will drove like the wind, and after a few minutes, we were almost there. I was still bleeding, it wasn't much, mostly a pink color in the amniotic fluid, but I was desperate. I tried to hold my breath so Will wouldn't realize I was crying, hiding my face while I stared at the window, but he knew. He always knew.

“Everything will be fine” He tried to calm me down, holding my hand. I pulled mine away, turning to face him.

“If something happens to her, I will never forgive you” I replied with coldness in my voice, cleaning my face with my hands. He didn't answer, but I saw how much it hurt him.

Finally, we arrived, and we rushed to the reception desk. A nurse sat me in a wheelchair, and I was directly to the labor room.

I was thrilled. Five days passed since the meaning of my life had changed entirely. She was a healthy baby girl and, despite the bleeding I had, everything went relatively well. We just had to stay a few more days in observation, because I've had preeclampsia and had a cesarean. I was breastfeeding her, looking at those dark blue eyes, her daddy's eyes. She looked so much like him.

Will didn't leave me for a minute. He was there from the moment I went in labor, until he saw her for the first time. His eyes glowed, and suddenly, just for a moment, he looked like the man he used to be before Hannibal Lecter. The man I loved. He stared at us in awe, making me feel like a madonna with her baby.

The phone rang. Will got up to answer it, allowing the call.

“Who is it?” I inquired, seeing his smile disappear. I felt like I was being punched in the stomach. That face. Would he dare?

I quickly gave the baby to the nurse, getting up the bed with enough care to avoid breaking my stitches.

“Give me the phone.” I practically commanded, taking advantage of the element of surprise, pulling the phone from his hand. “Of course you had the nerve to reach us in a happy moment like this. You're used to misery and you want to make everyone as miserable as you can.”

“Ah, Y/n. I wanted to congratulate both of you. A baby is always a blessing” I realized how much his voice tone had changed, simply because he didn't had to pretend anymore. He sounded malicious, cold. That was the real Hannibal Lecter. How the fuck did he know? My mouth felt dry all of a sudden. “I've sent a gift for her. I'm sure it will arrive in no time.”

“A gift?” I practically yelled, holding the phone so hard my fingers started to hurt “We don't want anything from you, Hannibal. We want you to leave us alone. We want you to disappear for real. That's all we want.”

“Ah, Y/n. That's very rude.” He said in a cynical voice, making me blush in anger. “How is Will? You barely let me speak to him. He's always in my thoughts, you know. Such as all of you.”

“He's fine. We're all fine. Living our lives without you to feed on our anguishes and torments.”

“Tell me, Y/n. Are you nursering your little one yourself?” He asked calmly. I was took by surprise, my face turning pale.

“Excuse me?”

“Amputate a man's leg and he can still feel it tickling. Tell me, Y/n, if someday your little girl disappears, where will it tickle you?”

My eyes filled with tears, and I felt like something was pressuring my chest. For a few seconds, I couldn't breathe, but my voice was still cold, even though it trembled a little.

“If you ever come near my daughter, you'll regret it. I assure you, Lecter. I'll make sure you never harm anyone else again. If I see you again, be sure, I will kill you.” I replied, the tears wetting my face.

“Y/n. How pleasant to see how I've changed you. We will meet again. Be sure of that.” The line turned mute.

I kept holding the phone, a little shocked from what I just heard. Will took it off my hand, hugging me and kissing my forehead. I hugged him back, hiding my face in his chest. I felt protected, despite everything.

“You shouldn't have said those things. He won't forgive it, and certainly won't forget.” He said, caressing my hair.

“Let him come.” I replied, my voice tone cold and empty. “I'll be ready.”

#Hannibal #Will Graham #Mads Mikkelsen #Hugh Dancy #Will Graham x Reader #Will Graham Imagine #Will Graham Headcanon #Hannibal One-shot #Hannibal Imagine #Hannibal Headcanon

206 notes · View notes

victoriareyloficlists · 4 years

Text

31/12/2020 Additions to Reylo Fluff

These fics have been added to the Fluff list located here.

Five Days by AttackoftheDarkCurses (AO3 2019 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: When Rey spends winter break at her friend's apartment, it only takes five days for everything to change.) And a Partridge in a Pear Tree by hearts_0f_kyber (rw_eaden) (AO3 2020 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey has been getting presents on her desk every day of December. They're wonderful, thoughtful little gifts but there's only one problem: she has no idea who they're from.) I don't want a lot for Christmas by Rebeccaseal (AO3 2020 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: In which Rey helps Ben find presents for his mother and somehow ends up going to Christmas dinner with him as his fake girlfriend. Or at least, it's fake at first.) father christmas. by pyroallerdyce (AO3 2020 Rated G Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben's the local mall's Santa Claus this year. Zorii dares Rey to go sit on his knee.) christmas cookies. by pyroallerdyce (AO3 2020 Rated G Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben's trying to perfect a Christmas cookie recipe for his bakery to sell, Rey is trying to get people to agree to come to a charity event, and when Ben gets locked out of his apartment, Rey helps him get back inside, and Ben invites her in to try a cookie. Turns out Rey loves his bakery.) Look No Further Sequel: Change of Plans by thewayofthetrashcompactor (BriarLily) (AO3 2019 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: After making it through Thanksgiving with his family, Rey and Kylo start to wonder if there might be more to this fake dating thing after all.) If I Was A Raindrop (Would You Be My Thunderstorm) by itsnotillegal (AO3 2020 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey has the hots for her coworker/friend Ben and decides to finally do something about it and send him a valentines card. While at the shop choosing a card, she bumps into Ben and is too embarrassed to confess the card is for him and lies about the intended recipient. Ben is in love with Rey and gutted the card is not for him!) Insufferable by castles_and_crowns (AO3 2018 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey Niima and Ben Solo are both student ambassadors at their university. This means that, unfortunately for Rey, they often get stuck with each other at various university events. Rey finds Ben Solo to be an insufferable snob until he begins to slowly prove to be otherwise.) Get Rekt by Thelittlescrimshaw (AO3 2016 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: He was drunk, they all were, but slinging an arm around her shoulders and declaring Rey his wife was not how she imagined the first party of the semester going.) the water smells like you by shruggyben (AO3 2020 Rated G Complete, One-Shot, Harry Potter AU, Quick Synopsis: In which Ben Solo, Ravenclaw dumbass, brews the perfect batch of the strongest love potion in the wizarding world, but accidentally feeds it to his one (1) crush. Adorable panic ensues.) Trip to the cinema: How bad can it be? by StaticTeeth (AO3 2016 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: A college AU with Rey, Ben, Poe and Finn. Poe and Finn being Ben and Rey's besties and they set Ben and Rey up together.) Bullet Pound by jeeno2 (AO3 2018 Rated E Complete, 4 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: On a whim, Rey watches a porno her friend recommended. To her surprise, she recognizes one of the actors.) It's A Pretty Good Bad Idea, Me and You by Mugglelover27 (AO3 2020 Rated M Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey had a great date the other night. Unfortunately, that date was with her professor.) Baby Shark by Melusine11 (AO3 2020 Rated G Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben Solo, kindergarten teacher extraordinaire can handle a lot. Fights over who is the leader in line for the day, crying over not getting the right color crayon they want, puke after gym time, but the one thing that consistently raises his blood pressure is one damnable song.) Yes, Daddy by bellestar (AO3 2020 Rated M Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: An AU where actor Ben is on the red carpet and photographer Rey can’t get him to look at her so she shouts “YES DADDY” to get his attention and it *works*. He turns around to look at her, smiles, and she gets the perfect shot.) The Life You Always Dreamt Of by KyloTrashForever (AO3 2018 Rated E Complete, One-Shot, Victorian AU, Quick Synopsis: In 19th century London, Rey is a poor street rat desperate for someone to see her as something more. Little does she know that the mysterious and powerful Skywalker heir has set his sights on on her to become his wife, and will do everything in that power to make her his.) Employee Engagement by Celia_and (AO3 2020 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: The HR survey that Rey takes actually seems more like a list of first date questions. Ben Solo works in HR. Coincidence? ...Maybe.) keep calm and let HR handle it by hi_raeth (AO3 2019 Rated T Complete, 6 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey managed to go a full year without ever directly interacting with her new CEO, but now it seems like he’s dropping by her office every single week.) The Peanut Problem by JJJJ12 (AO3 2019 Rated E Complete, 2 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben has never understood why all of Rey’s friends call her Peanut. When he learns it’s because she inadvertently attracts not-so-well endowed men, he makes it his mission to not-so-subtly convey the size of his dick without whipping it out.) Fool Me Once by KyloTrashForever (AO3 2019 Rated E Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: In which Rey is the only one who knows it’s actually a date.) Something About November Chapter 5 by SpaceWaffleHouseTM (AO3 2019 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: For a minute a day, Ben is able to see through his soulmate’s eyes. He has no other way of communicating with her, or finding her.) Game On! (aka Deflowering Doctor Jackass) by Crysania (AO3 2018 Rated E Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: When Rey is stranded at her bookshop in the middle of an upstate NY snowstorm with a local professor she knows only as "Doctor Jackass", she decides the best way to pass the time is to play a game. And that, of course, leads to other activities.) Blindsided by KyloTrashForever (AO3 2019 Rated E Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: In which Ben’s anonymous sex isn’t that anonymous after all.) coarse and rough and irritating by frak-all (or_ryn) (AO3 2019 Rated E Complete, 3 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: The first time Ben sees Rey in a bikini, his oafish left hand just sort of spasms around a brand new tube of Neutrogena SPF 100+ face sunscreen, squeezing hard enough that nearly half of its thick white contents erupts—coating his palm, the mirror, and the floor—in one great big mortifying spurt. It’s a metaphor from the universe even he can’t ignore.) Java Empire And The Rebel Café by fairytalesandfolklore (AO3 2019 Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: A Reylo Coffeeshop AU. Rey works for the Solo's coffeeshop and finds out their son has gone to work for the competing corporate chain. She tries to get him to reconcile with his parents but a misunderstanding makes him push her away.) it's a date by hipgrab (merrymegtargaryen) (AO3 2018 Rated G Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: It takes Rey approximately half an hour to realize that they’re on a date.) Look No Further by thewayofthetrashcompactor (BriarLily) (AO3 2019 Rated T Complete, 9 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey is spending Thanksgiving alone but a late-night Craigslist ad ends up with her agreeing to crash some asshole's family dinner. At the very least, she's curious what kind of people name their son "Kylo Ren" anyway.) Getting Handy by andabatae (AO3 2019 Rated E Complete, 4 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben’s not sure how to flirt with the woman who performs repairs at his apartment complex, so he keeps breaking things in order to see her again. Unfortunately, Rey now thinks he has an anger management problem...)

#reylo #reylo fanfic

12 notes · View notes

amomentintimeblackcattales · 3 years

Text

A Moment in time - Descending in The Darkness

Chapter 0002

They are strange ruins, discovered in a construction of one of my laboratories. - He said, leading him towards the underground floor.

- I intend to show it to others. - said Luthor.

Luthor said with interest. - It will be a great tourist resort, a historical mystery.

- Why for me? Bruce asked.

- Wall something, like something you've seen. - said Luthor.

- I intended, to choose you as my partner, I would like to know what you discovered in some caves. - said Luthor.

They walked down a narrow corridor, in its center there was a circular stone staircase, and in the center a long hole, which he saw a side entrance of corridors, and what would be a stalactite and stalagmite tip.

There was an immense image on his right, that of a dragon, or bat ...

Inscriptions carved everywhere, drawings made in rock and stones.

There was a large dragon, with scaly wings, and several other sculptures, depicting a battle of monsters on a rock.

What was in its center, there was a man, and around there were several monsters, and the human image looked like ...

- With you ... - Luthor said.

Showing a transformation in carved stone, the various forms of monsters around.

- They worship a dragon. - Bruce said.

A man who turns into a dragon, in addition to black smoke coming out of the center of the dark black hole, looked like an abyss.

"Well," said Bruce. - Familiar.

- I heard about some ancient religions. - said Luthor.

- Some old ones, venerated bats and dragons. - said Luthor. - The resemblance is striking. - said Luthor.

- You know, that I heard that you are getting involved with some people that are not human and not even mortal. - said Luthor.

- You found out? Bruce asked.

- I also have some circles of unhuman friendships. - said Luthor.

- What do you want, Luthor? Bruce asked.

- I would like you to introduce me, and be my contact. - said Luthor.

- If you introduce me to your friendships ...? Bruce asked.

- All my pleasure. - said Luthor. - I present mine, you present yours. - They said.

Then they both shook hands.

- He looks like you. - said Luthor.

- This looks like an ancient religion, more precisely a cult. - Bruce said.

- Let's go. - Said Luthor pulling the man with him.

They went up again

- I found an informant. - Said Lois, who received a message from one of the informants on the streets, with her came between the quays and the alleys of Gotham, to be kidnapped.

Bruce was following Lois, with cameras hidden between the streets, he picked up a camera in question, he was beeping.

A few minutes before.

As always, Lois was ignoring the fact that Lois was in danger, she was following an informant, at the Metropolis docks, when she entered an abandoned warehouse, being surprised and surrounded by Joker.

He cornered her, while the woman was surrounded by others of his henchmen.

- What do you think you're doing? Cried Lois.

- Causing chaos throughout the city. - One of the ones I caught. - Said Joker kidnapping Lois Lane, she was knocked out.

The woman woke up realizing that she was in a room, knowing that it was possibly an abandoned factory, tied with leather ropes, on a bed beside her was Iris West and Lucius Fox, Steve Trevor.

- You woke up. - Said Joker beside him, he wore a mask, and Punchline was beside him.

- You can not do that. - Said Lois.

- Sure I can. - Said Joker.

- Imagine what Superman will do. - Said Joker. - The Wonder Woman and the copy of Batman and Flash running drugged and killing one enemy after another, are all innocent, with each of them imagining that they are killing their enemies. - Said Joker.

- Just imagine that what they will do to the world until the effect of the drug wears off.

- All of this is your fault. - Said Joker. - Because you couldn't stay at home. - Said.

- You know the rules. - Lois said, trying unsuccessfully to loosen the leather rope.

- Yes. - Said Joker with a smile. - But I don't care. - Said. - Besides I made him kill you. - Said.

- He will become a killing machine, and everything around him will come with him.

- I left clues for them to come and kill each one of you. - Said Joker. - Thinking it's me. - Said the clown smiling, until he laughed.

"No." said Lois. - You can not. - He cried.

- Curse. - Said Steve. - Imagine. - That I put a bomb on your breasts. - Said Joker.

- When they arrived. - Said the clown.

- They will kill him and the cities will be destroyed one by one. - Said Joker.

- And we will have many innocent people killed. - Said Joker.

- When he kills each of you. - Said Joker. - I made it not just him, kill. - Said Joker

- How are you going to get them to kill us one by one? Asked Steve Trevor.

- Hallucinogens, and red kryptonite. - Said Joker. - In addition to fear gas. - Said Joker. - All in a prepared gas.

They received a message sent to all the newspapers, they saw that Lois was kidnapped.

There was a message from Joker on the screen.

- I'm counting the time, heroes. - Said Joker. - You have 2 hours to find me, and save your loves. - Said Joker, sending a kiss.

- If not, cities, there are bombs with a timer where I am, if they don't arrive on time, I blow up Metropolises, Star City, Central City and Gotham ...

- Curse. - They saw the footage showing Steve Trevor, Lois Lane, Lucius Fox and Superman flew skyward, stood still for several minutes listening to Lois' heart.

Wonder Woman was right behind Superman, almost in his direction.

- I got. - Said Superman, he activated the communicator in his ear. - I'm on the way, follow my coordinates. - Said.

- I'm almost on your heels, Superman. - Said Wonder Woman. - Wait for me. - She asked.

- There is no time. - Said Superman.

With super speed, he left a trail of blue and red, Wonder Woman was in his direction.

Superman came to a factory, he broke into the entrance.

- Damn you, Joker. - You are not going to kill her. - Shouted, he was ready to flee, seeing the man of steel, being followed by Diana and Flash following shortly after,

Lois was desperate, as soon as she entered, he was knocked out by kryptonite, weakening, a gas appeared in front of him.

- No ... - No ... - Lois cried. - Kal, get out of here.

As it was late, Superman saw the Apocalypse in front of him.

- What did you do with Lois. - growled Superman.

Revelation ... - He was enraged. - I'm going to kill you, if you hurt Lois.

- Bombs will explode in all five cities. - Said Joker leaving the side of the wall, he was behind Superman with an oxygen mask.

Lois was crying.

Gases appeared and a red and green liquid dispersed through the air.

Diana arrived just behind, Damn Joker, she drew her sword, and went towards everyone there, ready to deliver a sword stroke towards Steve, just behind came the Flash that was hit by the hallucinogen, all prepared to catch, or kill your executioners.

- What did you do with Iris, Twayne? - Asked Barry, and just behind came Batman.

- No son. - Said Lucius, they were all prepared, and Superman, ready to fly skyward.

- Who cares about rules. - Said Joker. - May the world explode.

It all happened at once, in the midst of tears, crying, and then the man threw a green gas towards the ground, and then water and a wave of electroshock .

All of this, towards the ground, knocking everyone out there, including Superman, a blast of green kryptonite, towards Superman throwing them across the factory wall, all falling to the floor, unconscious.

- I care. - Bruce said, he was there around them, with a syringe.

- Like? - Joker tried, immobilized, Bruce took an electroshock gun and hit the clown in the chest, throwing him on the floor.

Bruce went to Lois, and untied it, then he took a pair of tweezers.

- He's in ... - She gasped.

- Silence, Lois, I know. - He said, using a scalpel, and piercing his chest, where there was a barely contained tape, he used anesthesia, on the woman, taking the pump, and then .

He went to a computer on the side and deactivated the bomb and the countdown, and the bomb.

Then he went towards each one of them, who was conscious and deactivated the timer, and took them out of them.

"Good," said Bruce.

- How did you find me? Asked Lois, being untied.

- I put a tracker and a bug on you. - Bruce said.

- But....

- You haven't changed your blouse in a week, dear. - Bruce said. - Not even a bra. - Said.

- And how did you know he was doing this specific drug.

- I put a tracker on Joker too, he didn't change his shirt. - Bruce said.

- He didn't change the recipe and raw material or the formula for his drugs. - Well, that I listened to his whole plan. - Bruce said.

- Why did you let them get here? Asked Lois.

- I wanted to catch them at the same time, knock them out with my new weapon. - Bruce said.

They were leaving, listening to the police sirens.

- When was that? Asked Lucius.

- I called the Metropolis police. - Bruce said.

- When did you call the police? - Steve asked.

- Coming here, I calculated the time, when they would come. - Bruce said.

They were walking, towards the street, when Superman, Wonder Woman, Flash and Batman appeared.

Well. - Superman said, he was stunned, Joker, not moving, but the clown got up unexpectedly, and threw a red gas at Superman, stunned staggering backwards.

He took Lois hostage and ran, with everyone there in pursuit, but in the middle of the street towards his car, he drove, but was stopped in the middle of the highway, they ended up a few meters towards the ruins discovered by Luthor.

Superman punched the car's engine, sinking in front of the fissure, in the middle of the street, when he stopped, throwing the car .

While the clown did not surrender, he left using Lois as a shield, a weapon towards the woman's back.

- Come on, there Superman.

Everyone went towards Joker, he was surrounded, laughing with blood, and a broken nose, around them, was Superman, Wonder Woman, and Flash.

- You know. - Said the clown, - I know in a way that would be much better. - Said taking a bomb out of his pants. - Come on heroes. - He said. - I let Lois live and you kill Bruce, baby. - He said.

- Imagine. - Said Joker. - He sacrifices himself for Lois. - And while you kill him. - Laughing at breaking up.

Superman at that point had no restrictions, even Wonder Woman would miss his inhibitors, he still felt the effects of hallucinogens, but he remained standing.

- Come on heroes ... - But what he had done, it was stuffy, Superman didn't care about anything, there were no restrictions, he pushed Lois, throwing her, he took the clown in his hands, almost crushing them.

Lois trying to get up, she went towards Superman.

- Don't do this, you will regret it. - You tried Lois.

- Get out of here, Lois. - growled Superman, without waiting for Bruce at the last moment.

He had a baton in his hands, he threw a kryptonite powder or gas, Superman sucked it, turning towards the gas, but he was not ready for the baton, which electrocuted and bent it on the floor, increasing the voltage with a light blinding him, making Superman bend and kneel.

Wonder Woman, they turned around. - She takes so much work. - Diana said, a little dizzy.

The other heroes arose around him, Green Arrow, J'onn the Martian, and Hal the Green Lantern.

They were making preparations, with a construct, he took the bomb towards the ground.

- Bruce, how long ... - But he stopped in the middle of what he was going to say.

- You look so bad ... - He fell stunned kneeling on the floor, he saw the star sapphire arrive.

- You are well? - He asked with his hands on his shoulders.

He turned in his direction.

- You are a lot of work, and with a fist construct he unexpectedly threw a punch towards Sapphire, she fell to the floor.

- I will get rid of you, and I will earn a buck. - He said. Starting a fight of constructs.

Superman was stunned, half hallucinating there was still a trace of drugs in his system.

- Let's kill her, Kal. - Diana said. - She wouldn't be so much of a problem if she died. - Diana said.

They all take so much work. - Said Flash arriving right now. - They were trapping them, there was still a vapor in the air, everyone was stunned, Bruce decided to put on the mask, he saw that there were vapors coming out of the Joker's car, he apparently was a drug that influenced, it arose from the engine.

While the vapors took everyone around him, starting to fight and fight. - There would be a carnage, if they did not stop it, the two Martians fighting while they changed form, Black Canary was fighting with the arrows of green Arrow.

- Let's kill them all. - Said Batman, that son of Lucius was strange.

The heroes brought all the policemen and their loves, placed around there, fighting, and promising to kill them.

- Kal. - Said Lois. - Don't do that, you have to get back to normal. - You are no use, Lois. - Said Superman. - In addition to bringing problems.

- He slapped her in the face, one after the other, not hurting her too much with the back of his hand. - I just stay with you, to avoid problems. - Said Superman.

That gas must take away all their sanity and inhibitions, Bruce thought.

He threw her on the floor, the woman crawled backwards. - Superman's eyes went red, ready to incinerate.

- I don't need you Steve. - Diana said. - I need a man, any one will do. - Diana said, she was ready to strike a blow from her sword towards Steve's head.

He tried to defend himself by pushing her, but being punched, and with a sword close to his neck, close to beheading him.

- I am the fastest man, alive, I can find any woman for me, Iris. - Barry said.

He headed over to Joker who was laughing on the floor with his throat almost dented.

- What did you damn you.

- I took their inhibitions. - Said Joker. - They will do what they always wanted. - Said the clown. - I just gave a push. - Said the clown.

They were close to killing them, piercing their heads, with their fists, almost vibrating, Bruce ran towards a microphone, from the police, he took a baton and scratched it on the floor, calling everyone's attention, the sound of scratching was deafening, he had another weapon and a bomb prepared.

They stopped in a daze, he started to say.

- Bruce, friend. - Said Superman with a drugged expression. - What you want? - He asked.

- Do you know what you're doing? Bruce asked.

- You know what will happen if they kill. - Bruce said.

- I'm about to be a widower. - Said Superman.

- And then? Bruce asked.

- We'll keep the money. - Said Superman vulgarly shaking, looking drunk.

- I'll stay, rich. - Barry said.

- I will be a very rich princess. - Diana said.

- We'll split the money. - Said Hal.

- Once on earth, I will be happy. - Said J'onn.

- Really, do you think, that? Bruce asked.

- Their souls will be condemned. - Bruce said.

- You will remember this until the end of your lives. - Said.

- They'll give us money. - Diana said.

- As long as I stayed with Steve, it will be enough. - Diana said.

- Think, with me. - Bruce said. - Trigon feeds on souls, his mission is to corrupt the souls around him. - Bruce said.

- That's the same thing as a politician's word, in an election campaign. - Bruce said.

- They can promise. - Said Superman.

- They promise, yes, but they don't deliver. - Bruce said.

- They want to corrupt them. - Bruce said.

- You will not give anything to any of you. - Bruce said.

- Each of them, they are liars. - Bruce said.

- Lucifer is the prince of lies. - Bruce said.

- Who guarantees that they will comply with your words. - Bruce said.

"You will kill him, and you will have nothing but your blood and death in your hands." - Bruce said.

- In addition to condemning themselves, they are condemning everyone who will be sacrificed to them. - Bruce said.

- You are not and will never be free after that. - Bruce said.

- You will never forget those days onwards, and this day will be the real day, where you will never forget. - Bruce said.

- You are ignorant to think otherwise. - Bruce said.

Superman released Lois, and punched the floor.

- Damn, be those demons . - R snorted.

Right. - Said each of the heroes stopping, and releasing their opponents.

- Right. - Bruce said.

They stood still, and there was a crack in the floor, following Bruce, the man dropped a smoke kryptonite bomb and an antidote towards everyone there, who coughed and collected themselves after a few minutes.

- Aren't you going to kill anyone else? Bruce asked.

They looked ashamed, and looked towards Joker, who was tied up and restrained and taken towards an ambulance waiting.

When the earth shook more, a crack appeared, which increased with a crater that sank with everything, and with them, the first to fall, was Bruce.

Kal. - Bruce shouted. Falling over the precipice.

They all shouted afterwards, but tried to retreat, when vehicles were taken towards the craters that were forming and spreading, taking everything with him towards the precipice.

- Bruce. - Shouted Superman, his hands, but being raised towards his, but being taken, Superman flew towards him, but a green glow appeared.

"No." said the man of steel, who lost his powers each time they fell on Bruce.

- Kryptonite. - Bruce said, the first to drill, from the shoulder to the stomach, Bruce gasped, to which he hit his head towards several ends, and a sharp rock at the end of the crack, and from the ends, he fell towards the ground, with a bone-breaking thud.

God, all the weight of Superman next to two rocks, which pierced him horizontally, of a crooked perfection, entering the stomach between the vertebrae and the spine, and another, almost tearing his lung out and piercing him towards his shoulder almost ripped from your arm.

It was bleeding, some part piercing Superman's shoulder, just the top part, piercing, it was not a hole and a wound as extensive as Bruce's, both pierced his spine and spine.

Bruce had a blackout, he found himself in a light, and then gasping for another blackout, he saw himself in a river of blood, spitting and watching someone pull him .

At that hour, he was naked, there were flashes of light, which took him towards that red river and his company, a beautiful androgen man with white hair, who came out and pulled him from the river.

Bruce came back to reality and found himself in a sea of pain, he tried to speak, but blood came out.

- Bruce, are you with me? - Asked Superman.

- I saw such a beautiful light. - Bruce said.

- I trust you will do the right thing.

- Bruce, stay with me. - Said.

- You are good. - Bruce said

- She's calling me. - Bruce said.

- Bruce. - Said Superman, he was attached to Bruce, would not have strength.

- Do not go. - Said Superman, he heard a gurgle of blood, and the heart gave a thump, he raised his hand that was not pierced and moved, he saw a person pulling him, by the hand.

- Come with me ... - It was everything Bruce heard before his heart stopped.

- I love you. - Said Superman, but it was too late, his heart was no longer beating.

It was late, but the rescue came, Wonder Woman, arrived helped by other paramedics and heroes, who had to use a chainsaw to pull the man off the top of the other.

Then start it without needing another job to disconnect the man from Superman.

Conventional technology could not save the man already dead, both heroes did not give up.

The heart had been stopped just over twenty minutes after the end of the rescue process.

They revived him in the direction of the defibrillator.

- I do not know what to do. - Said a paramedic. - They looked towards the dead man.

- Diana. - Said Superman. - You help me? - Asked the man of steel.

- Anything. - Diana said.

- A copy of the purple ray. - Said Superman.

- We can bring him back. - Said Superman.

Technology, and traditional science, couldn't do it, nothing was beyond salvation, it needed to be sewn, but if he came back, he would be a vegetable.

They flew towards the Fortress of Solitude, and placed it in a suspended resuscitation tank.

The computer and the robots have done their job.

- He may not wake up. - Said your computer.

- No. - Superman said, they took him to a Kryptonian resuscitation tank.

- He'll wake up. - Said Superman.

They took the man in a Krypton cryogenic tank, in the fortress of solitude, there would be no salvation, but Diana took that inert body towards the purple rays, after reconnecting all the wires and rebuilding the damaged tissues, and connected the machines of the fortress. of loneliness.

There was an emergency message an alien attack, just at that time, forcing them to go out into the fight.

Exactly a week passed, until the end of the two-week cycle, Superman volunteered to be with Diana in the fortress of solitude, they were monitoring Bruce.

The man who was in a Kryptonian tank, with an oxygen hose, with a life support, with much of his body still being rebuilt and reconnected.

Bruce actually died, several times, which made him have an encounter with each of them, in another place outside the realms of death and life.

He was at a round table, sitting around them.

- I died? Bruce asked.

- Yes, - said Trigon. - But you did well. - Said Trigon.

- The serum you used helps to prolong life. - Said Trigon. - You just spent a life. - Said Trigon.

- It went up in my concept. - Said Trigon.

- Cool, but what's the use ? - questioned Bruce.

- You won. - Said Miguel.

- I didn't kill anyone. - Bruce said.

- Yes, you prevented them from killing and their souls were not condemned to the abyss. - Said Neron.

- That made him a champion, someone who without any other way, did it because he believed that nothing good would come out of there. - Said Neron.

- He won. - Said Trigon.

- Do we agree? Asked Lucifer.

- We are. - They all said.

- So he managed to keep them from killing. - Said Azazel.

- I would say that he is the great warrior who prevented them from killing. - Said Mamon.

- Congratulations. - Said Lucifer.

- You will now have a new chance. - Said Azazel.

In the fortress of solitude exactly twenty minutes after Superman and Wonder Woman left.

Unbeknownst to him, he would be in a mystical meeting.

They left and it was exactly twenty minutes later and all the demons of the bet appeared in front of him, with the unconscious man, inside the tank.

Trigon appeared in front of the tank and with the touch of his demonic power he opened the tank's hatch and placed it on that bed, each of them touched his body.

Bruce gasped and screamed, waking up then, fully recovering, jumping to his feet in a defensive position, but looking toward each of them.

- So ... - Bruce said.

- And now ? - Bruce asked.

- You know. - Said Trigon there's more to the bet than we actually said. - Said Trigon.

- Come with us. - Said Trigon.

- Why...? - He asked.

- Come on, come with us, we have a surprise. - Said Nekron.

Bruce accompanied them, he didn't seem to be there to argue.

A few days ago in a bar ...

He spent that night at the bar, he simply wanted to forget, in a hidden corner of the night bar, with a huge cloak, and hiding from view, he thought that a cloak would cover who he was, foolishly, in the middle of his fourth bottle, someone sat down. your front.

When at last, touching the table, he raised his face from the bottle, and it was ...

- Trigon ...?

- How?

- Well ... well ... - Said the demon ...

- What you want? - He asked.

In the end, the bar darkened, and people did not go out, they observed, but not before he was oppressed by the presence of the demon.

- I want to bet with you. - He said.

- Why...? - He thought of escape routes, but there were more around him, they were Trigon, Lucifer, Mamon, Miguel, Rafael, Azazel, Neron, Spectro , Nekron and Phantom Stranger, all sat around the table.

- What do you all do here ...?

- We came to bet. - Said Trigon as his spokesman.

- Bet what? Bruce asked.

- Wouldn't you be interested? Asked Spectro.

- So what are you going to bet? Bruce asked, apparently without a way out.

- The bet is as follows. - Said Lucifer.

- At least 2 heroes from each city in America will kill. - Said. - An innocent. - Said Lucifer.

- And who said that a hero will kill for each one of you? Bruce asked.

- Let's just stick to the question. - Said Neron.

- For money. - Said Lucifer.

- What? Bruce asked.

- And what do you want with that? - Bruce asked, he felt a headache, anger and resentment, besides that he knew it was not a hangover.

- For money. - Said Azazel.

- A lot of money. - Said Neron.

- Apparently I would be rich only in killing. - Bruce said.

- That, in addition to greed. - Said Azazel.

- Prove that even the most brave of heroes succumb to the sins of gluttony and ambition. - Said Neron.

- They won't do that. - Bruce said.

- So if you believe that so much, Bruce, bet with us. - Said Azazel.

- And what would I take with that? Bruce asked.

- The fact that you saved innocents and that you prevented people from dying. - Said Spectro.

- You are perfect for us. - Said Spectro.

- You will be the judge and the mediator of the bets. - Said Trigon. - What are we doing. - Said Trigon.

- And why do you think I would help you with anything, or just participate in your schemes? - Bruce disputed.

- Because if you don't accept. - Said Azazel.

- We will go after another after another until we succeed, and he or she will be part of our bet. - Said Trigon .

- And they won't have a choice in the end. - Said the fallen angel Miguel.

- Do you think it will be easy, like this? Bruce asked.

- In the absence of your opinion, others will emerge. - Said Nekron.

- It will happen whether you want to or not. - Said Trigon.

- You are just one of the chosen ones. - Said Neron.

- So, what are the bets? Bruce asked.

- You will bet, or you can prevent. - Said Neron.

- What's the bet on you? Bruce asked.

- The bet is as follows. - Said Rafael.

- The rules of the bet. - Said Trigon.

- Two heroes from each city after two weeks. - Said Trigon.

- Two sinless heroes from each city, he being pure and innocent, if he kills a person of his own free will he should kill an innocent person without sin, after two weeks if they kill, they will receive 700 billion dollars. - Said Azazel.

- They may or may not kill. - Said Trigon. - They are free to do it or not. - Said Trigon.

- They will each receive 700 billion dollars and 30 gold bars, for the first hero, if they kill seven innocents after three days. - Said Trigon.

- What if they don't kill? Bruce asked.

- They won't get anything. - Said Azazel.

- That simple? Bruce asked.

- That simple. - Said Azazel.

- What if I prevent it? Bruce asked. - What do I get out of it? Bruce asked.

- Besides the fact that you prevented someone from being killed? Asked Trigon.

- Will you save souls who may or may not go to my kingdoms? Asked Trigon. - The glory of saving innocents.

- Three days? Bruce asked.

- Yes, that's enough to bring it to the fore.

- All right. - Bruce said. - Anything else I need to do? Bruce asked.

- Observe each of the heroes who may come to kill. - Said Trigon. - You will be the judge. - Said Trigon.

- When are you going to do that? Bruce asked.

- Now. - They said.

- What...? - But there was a smoke and everyone disappeared.

In the next second, he heard a crash, and all the televisions started to drizzle, the ground shook, the weather was overtaken by a red haze, all around him, voices were heard.

Bruce left everything there, and when accompanied by all the people who left and heard and saw Nekron himself and other heroes and across all heroic cities, above the city skies.

In those two weeks later, he was taken towards his mansion, he was there in that cave.

They sat down, Bruce realized he was naked, but it didn't matter.

- I was included in this bet. - Bruce said. - And now? - He asked.

- You know we have a story to tell. - Said Mamon.

We've been betting for ages. - Said. - And we will tell you what it is. - Said Mamon.

There were ancient stories among the oldest, the demons and the gods, ancient entities.

To what they knew about a deity who was a great gambler.

They knew he was a mediator and witness to big bets, and it was about a long-forgotten deity.

This divinity that self-exiled from these worlds to other unknown worlds, and the old stories told that she was the biggest gambler, but that her betting wheel, were made in an old castle on the waters and the mirrors of the dimensions.

From time to time, during great upheavals and events that she sent invitations between each of the kingdoms of each demon that when accepting the invitations should go to the place of the mythical waters that was between the borders, the rules should stick ...

Yes, there were rules, but it was established by the mirrors that sent for a long time, an acceptance among the red mists and the mirror, there was the rule that could not be broken.

Ages who did not see their hostess, who gave bets from time to time.

She was famous for showing each of the mirrors that showed possible futures and worlds for each solution, among these worlds, they chose an avatar or mediator, would be their judge or judge.

The exact reasons for her self-exile was to be the guardian of the spiritual world at the back door, so to speak, but even that did not prevent betting among the oldest, demons were her greatest betting colleagues.

There were the biggest bet since ancient times.

Obviously Gotham City and Metropolis was the devil's gambling den, they had fun at the expense of other humans.

There when he saw Trigon, Lucifer, Mamon, Miguel, Rafael, Azazel, Neron, Spectro Nekron and Phantom Stranger who were seated in what would be a room circulating between fog, white marble, pillars and white wells, that in the center of that table there was a white puddle with a reflection of a person, between several mirrors.

They are gathered here, because they accepted my invitation. - Said the crystalline voice in the middle of a river of several streams and waterfalls around what would be a foggy world.

- So, what's the bet? - He asked.

- First, let's stick to the rules ...

I will choose a mediator, who will be my representative, you will oblige him to follow the established rules.

He will be a mortal man who lost everything, and was only a few months or years from his death, he must be a warrior the strongest among mortals and he cannot have powers.

We will choose two or more cities, we will send our avatars, and we will choose a representative, who will act on behalf of each one of us. - Said the voice.

- In my case I choose the human, who lost everything, and with that, lost the faith in humanity, the one who fought for it a long time ago, and will have his life lost for her.

- I will use it and you will use it. - Said.

The rule is to induce betting. - Said. - Summon him to a place that is neutral and stick to the rules.

- And if he wins to prevent what we have done, the souls of all of them, will be mine, and I will choose him as mine.

- You will be able to choose whoever you want and influence everyone there, you will be able to use her tricks, but she will not be able to use mine, only her own resources without powers.

You will bet with me the following, under the rules ...

One or more blessed souls, being pure and without sins, within a period of seven calendar days, without rest, they will be able to kill one or more blessed souls.

Being them, they will be free from any fear and sin, and being pure, without being induced to practice, being of spontaneous free initiative. - Said. - Only by your own will and initiative.

- The man in question must not know the exact question of his winnings from the bet.

- If sinners kill innocent people it won't be worth it. - Said. - Because sinners will always kill, since they sin.

A sinner can influence an innocent person to kill. - Said. - And he will win part of that innocent person's wishes.

- Both will be taken to their kingdoms, both the person who was sacrificed and those who sacrificed them. - Said.

- Why would a blessed soul practice sin? Asked Lucifer.

- For the greatest and oldest of sins. - Said the voice.

- Greed, pride, greed, greed and pride, as well as lies. - Said the voice.

Greed will be used. - We will give a wealth equivalent to the greed of the world. - Said. - If you win.

- And what would that be? Asked Mammon.

The fairest of men would do anything for money. - Said Trigon.

- The riches. - Said the voice. - I will give a value equivalent to the greed of four European countries the richest together.

- A value that would make you a multimillionaire and not get poorer.

- Give a value ... - Said your hostess.

Everyone there thought and started calling until ...

- How about ... - Trigon said ... - That would be my contribution. - Said the red demon. - 550 billion dollars in solid gold. - Said Trigon.

- 330 billion euros. - Said a Lucifer.

- 700 billion dollars. - Said Azazel.

- The gift of abundance and prosperity. - Said Mamon.

- Forever millionaire. - Said Neron.

- Luck. - Said Gabriel.

- A vacation package to travel to any part of the multiverse for one year round trip. - Said the Presence. - Without anyone or danger finding it.

- Eternal youth. - Said Phantom Stranger. - For as long as you need.

- Lest he miss anything. - Said. Rafael. - Do not miss drink or food. - Said.

- So if he loses, there will be no live version of the multiverse in his life, he will be taken to me, and he will cease to exist completely. - Said the entity.

If he fails to prevent death from arising by these means , he will be taken away and will no longer be able to reincarnate or return to any reality, any reality in which he lives, his every soul.

If, within seven days, the chosen cities, give in to the most intimate sins and kill, during that time, all the inhabitants of those cities, they will be condemned to the hell of each one of you.

Then they will be taken to hell and divided equally. - Said the entity.

- Which cities will be chosen? - They questioned.

- Gotham, Metropolis, Central, Keystone, Gateway City, Coast City, Keystone City, Star City and lastly Fawcett City.

Current moment, after two weeks.

- Then. - Bruce said. - Besides that I won a bet. - Bruce said.

- A trip. - Bruce said.

- Do you want the money? Asked Phantom Stranger.

Bruce looked enraged.

- Of course I do. - Said.

- I'm going to take my gap year. - Bruce said.

The mountain of gold and money appeared in front of him in the cave.

2 notes · View notes

miss-tc-nova · 4 years

Text

Unwarranted or Not - Roxas x Fem!Reader x Ventus Pt 1

I’m stuck in that stage again where Jesse McCartney songs just scream Roxas or Ven for me. So I’ve been listening to his music again. I honestly don’t know where this series is going but here we go.

This part was written while listening to the Turtle’s song “Jealous” from season 3 of The Masked Singer.

Part 1: Jealous

Giggling, I push the hair from my face. “Geeze, you’re a dork.”

The blonde frowns. “Come on! How was I supposed to know that Terra was about to run around the corner?!”

“I bet you he was thrilled to be covered in strawberry filling.”

He sighs, letting his face fall into his palms. “No, not really. But I was way more scared of Aqua when she found out I stole and then ruined her dessert.”

“Oh ho, I bet she was furious.”

His hands drag down his face. “Her glare is far worse than any spell she could’ve used on me.”

Today is Kairi’s birthday so everyone has gathered to celebrate. I’m only the newest addition to the party, having been introduced through my boyfriend. Apparently, everyone here is connected through some big event that I haven’t learned about yet, but that’s not important. I did learn about other worlds though and, boy, did I have a heart attack the first time I left my home world; he still complains that I almost crushed his ribs. Regardless, I’m part of the friend group now and they’re all great. I was accepted like I’d been friends with them forever.

For a while, the boy, Ventus, threw me off. He looks so much like my boyfriend that I could only stare for a moment. Once I got over the initial shock, the differences between them rang out clear as day. Down to their very presence, I could find all the differences in the world. I’m also very acutely aware that there’s a mild bitterness towards this blonde. However, while Ven isn’t exactly my type, that doesn’t mean he’s not a good friend.

I set my water bottle in the sand. “I’m impressed she had the self-control not to beat you.”

“That could partially be because Terra chased me all the way across the castle grounds by the time she found out.” I cackle at his torture. “So hey, I never got to ask, how did you and Roxas meet?”

The grin already on my lips widens. “It’s actually kinda funny. I was-”

“Hey, ______.” I look towards the group of others where Roxas is waving me closer.

“Just a minute,” I call back, before returning my attention to Ven. “Sorry. Anyway, I needed to-”

“______!” I look again. He’s wearing a frown as he waves me on again.

Miffed, I shout back, “Hold on! I’m telling a story!”

Ven laughs. “Maybe you should go see what he wants. You can tell me later.”

I sigh. “Sorry. I’ll be back.” I dust the sand from my shorts and wander over. I’m a bit perturbed when the rest of them start heading down the beach. “What’s up?”

“We’re gonna start some games. Come on.”

I don’t follow and he stops to look back. “I don’t feel like playing games right now. I’m just gonna talk to Ven and maybe bother Namine and Aqua.” I lean in to kiss his cheek. “But you have fun, ‘kay.”

His frown doesn’t go unnoticed but I am my own person; I can choose not to do something. When I settle back onto my towel, I see him still watching me, so I give a smile and wave. His glower doesn’t change but he does join the others in their games.

I chat with the friends that come to join me at various times, but Ven stays nearly the whole time so he’s my main conversation partner and a goofball at that. It’s still worth noting that Roxas frequently glances towards me with a glare that I’m sure I’ll have to answer to later.

“No way! Then what?” Ven chuckles.

I wipe a tear from my eye, hardly able to keep from giggling. “Well, Hayner’s freaking out trying to figure out where the voice is coming from and I’m on the floor, laughing so hard I’m crying ‘cause I can’t keep a straight face to save my life. And then Pence-”

Without warning, a hand wraps around my arm and pulls me to my feet. Roxas looks thoroughly annoyed.

“Ah! Hey!”

“I need you to come with me,” he says firmly.

“Uh, can it wait two seconds?” I manage to get out.

“Nope” and he pulls me away towards the shack leading up to the bridge. I look back at my friend who shares my shock but does nothing.

“Rox? Roxas, where are we going?” He doesn’t answer, just drags me along. “Hey, what’s going on? Roxas!” In the dimly lit wooden structure, he forcefully closes the door and we stand in silence. “Babe, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong,” he retorts. I raise a brow at him. “What?!”

“We’re standing in a dark, little shack when we’re supposed to be celebrating a friend’s birthday with our other friends.” The blue eyes avoid me, turning a glare on the darkness. I chuckle a little and rest a hand against his chest. “Come on. Tell me what’s bothering you.” When his eyes instead move to the ceiling, I slip my arms around his neck. My mischievous side leaks through as I lean closer to lowly threaten, “Don’t make me force an answer out of you.” I ever-so-lightly brush my nose along his jaw. “Though I wouldn’t mind another chance at marking that pretty skin of yours.” I know it’s working when goose bumps bloom across his skin and his inhale comes with a shudder. “That sounds like a yes to me.”

“It’s Ven,” he quickly utters.

I reign in my antics. “Ven? What about him?” His annoyance is replaced with the look a child would wear having been caught in the cookie jar. “Come on. Keep talking.”

“I don’t like that you’re hanging out with him so much,” he mumbles.

Ah. Jealousy. “Oh babe,” I soothe. “You don’t have to worry about him.” I walk my fingers along his shirt. “You know I’m crazy about you. I didn’t even push you off the clock tower when I thought you were nuts, spouting off about other worlds.”

“You were gonna push me off the clock tower?!”

“No. I did consider a couple psychiatrists though.” I pinch his cheek. “I’m so smitten I was willing to help you through whatever psychosis you had.”

Roxas shakes me off. “Bet you feel like a fool now.”

I shrug. “Point is, I love you, Roxas. And no one’s going to get in the way of that, especially Ven.”

A glint of something dark sparks in his eyes. “You know we’re practically the same person, right?”

“Pfft!” It takes a huge amount of effort to not break down laughing.

Roxas looks as if I’ve just insulted him; granted maybe I have. “What?!” he demands indignantly.

“I’m sorry, but you and Ven are nothing alike,” I reply, straightening up.“

“That doesn’t sound very comforting.”

“And why not?” He hesitates. “Sure, he warms up to people easily and he’s a bit more outgoing and social than you, but the fact that you’re more choose-y with your friends makes them all the more important. Besides, you know you’re smarter than he is, right?” A brow rises at me. “Look, he’s a great friend and all, but when you spend five minutes pulling on a door that says push, you’re not the brightest cookie.” Finally, Roxas breaks and smiles at my joke. “And honestly, you are way hotter than he is.”

“How-”

I tap a finger against his nose. “I just can. It’s really not that hard. You are two completely different people and you’re the one I love. So stop being jealous.”

He heaves a sigh, but his arms finally slip around my waist. “I don’t know about that.” The butterflies flutter when he leans in. “I’m not exactly worried about you being attracted to Ven.”

I can’t help the grin. “You think Ven’s attracted to me?” I laugh.

He’s turned my earlier mischief on me, lips grazing my ear. “I’d be surprised if he wasn’t. You’re too beautiful for your own good.” The heat races along my spine when his teeth tug at the skin. A squeak escapes me. “Mmm, but maybe I’ll just take your idea and let everyone know you’re taken.”

“Rox-” I can’t finish his name before his mouth is at my neck, pulling a soft moan from me. In response, the boy forcefully puts my back to the wall, successfully putting me under his spell.

Roxas, while less outgoing than Ventus, has a sort of hidden side. He’s more reserved and can sometimes come off as cold, but the moment you become a friend, it’s as if a switch has been flipped. He can be quick to anger or blissfully happy and is rather outspoken. So it goes without saying that dating him means seeing even more of that; seeing the desperation and desire—the things he displays only in these private moments.

“Ow!” I hiss.

He finally breaks his hold, but lingers a moment to soothe the sting with his tongue. A shudder ripples through me when he trails up my neck. The fingers at my hips tighten their grip, signaling that he’s not done. The next thing I know, his mouth is at mine, demanding everything: my attention, my consent, my love. Of course, he has it all; not that the flustered mess he’s turned me into could really argue with him. His kisses have always been messy and greedy; like he’s a dying man and this is his cure. It always makes me weak knowing that his feelings are true, that this is how he really feels. That and the show of dominance is kind of hot.

When he retreats, his eyes look me over. I’m flushed and gasping and quite frankly I’m prepared to die of suffocation as long as I can keep kissing him. A smirk appears on his lips.

“You really are beautiful, you know that?”

“I think you’re a little biased,” I breathe.

“So?” he hums, forehead resting against mine. “You’re mine. Does it matter what anyone else thinks?”

“I suppose not,” I laugh. “Are you gonna stop being jealous now?”

“Not even a little.”

#roxas #kh3 roxas #kh roxas #roxas x reader #roxas x oc #ven #ventus #kh3 ven #kh3 ventus #ven x reader #ventus x reader #kh ven #kh ventus #fem!reader

20 notes · View notes

yaboyshoyo · 5 years

Text

Oikuroo headcanons by your local multishipper

This is my first time writing headcanons so be kind with me pls

It took them a ridiculous amount of time to get together because they kept flirting with each other, but they couldn't understand if the other reciprocated their feelings or if they were just flirtatious with everyone

Oikawa is the little spoon because he loves feeling so cozy and protected (he would never admit it, but Kuroo knows anyway)

They love challenging each other at videogames. They both suck at playing videogames, but they can get extremely competitive with each other. They often make the loser prepare dinner, alternatively they find another penalty (in addition to the neverending teasing by the winner)

Oikawa has an amazing singing voice. Kuroo adores hearing him sing, but Oikawa gets pretty flustered about it. Despite that, when Kuroo is distressed or feeling down, he sings of his own will to soothe him

Kuroo, on the other hand, is an awesome baker. He often bakes for friends and family, but when he's stressed or nervous about something he will get into a baking fit and bake way too many things. Oikawa is obviously worried about him and offers his support, but he secretly enjoys having the privilege to eat so many sweets, since he has a hige sweet tooth. What they can't eat will be kindly given to neighbours and friends

Don't ever ever put this two on the same team. Be it volleyball or bowling, these two will absolutely annihilate you with strategy and perfect team dynamic (and their God-awful flirting)

When watching Oikawa's favourite sci-fi movies Kuroo will always point out whether the science described there is accurate or not, and Oikawa acts like he's annoyed because "it spoils the charm of the movie, Tetsu-chan", but he's actually fascinated by all that science trivia

Oikawa speaks French: initially ge wanted to learn it because it sounded pretty, but he eventually grew to learn the language, and Kuroo is fascinated by it

Whenever they take a bath together they start playing with the water and soap, like the five-years-old they are. One of their favourite bath games is to mess with each other's hair using shampoo; they always manage to find some ridiculous "hairstyle" to shape the other's hair with

They have a lot of tickle and pillow fights, but they make sure no one ever finds out about this, because it's something very intimate for them, since they completely let out their playful and dorky side for each other; everyone knows they're big dorks, but they prefer to keep the full extent of it to each other. Sometimes these fights end up in make out sessions, more often they end up with both of them lying on the floor, laughing like children

They both are two of the most polite people you'll ever meet. They always say "please" and "thank you" to retail workers, they let old people sit in the bus in their place and they always ask if someone needs help (though Oikawa can be a pretty big jerk, if he finds a reason to be)

Kuroo bought Oikawa a telescope for his birthday, and for this reason they often go to the country to stargaze. Oikawa always geeks out about his love for space and stars and space and Kuroo just listens with the biggest lovesick eyes, because he loves Oikawa's nerdy side (though he teases him for it)

Both of them read Dr. Stone, and they have in-depth discussions about it, especially after a new chapter comes out. Kuroo's favorite character is Senku, for obvious reasons (though he has a soft spot for Chrome), and Oikawa's is Gen, but he deeply admires Byakuya

They use terrible pick-up lines on each other (which often involve awful puns), even after they started dating, and all of their friends are so done with them

Kuroo is an extremely empathetic person, and when Oikawa is feeling really down he's always there to listen and offer any kind of comfort, from cuddles, to finding solutions to a problem, to just having a really intense session of volleyball playing. Oikawa, on the other hand, has more difficulty in handling Kuroo's bad days, but he tries to always be there for him, and Kuroo appreciates that a lot

They love to go out to eat ice cream together, because that was their first proper date (apparently horrible flirting in the library doesn't count), and they always spend a laughable amount of time arguing about ice cream flavours

They often study together, without speaking much, just enjoying each other's company. They only speak when one stands up to fetch something from the kitchen and asks the other if he wants something. Surprisingly, both of them focus better together than when studying alone

They hold competitions for literally anything, from who can reach their apartment the fastest to who can eat more strawberries in one minute. They even hold competitions to see who can brush his teeth the faster, and their friends are desperately trying to convince them that it's not a good idea

They very rarely go on fancy dates, preferring more domestic and comfortable dates (like going to the cinema, hanging out with friends etc.), but when they do go on dates in nice restaurants they go HARD, they are the best looking people in the place and they know it. They usually organise these sort of dates for extremely important achievements in their life or relationship, like getting a good job or moving in together

(this one is slightly NSFW, but it's nothing graphic I swear) their sex is obviously very passionate, but surprisingly sweet and intimate, they hold no secrets from each other about their bodies. They also laugh a lot and tease each other, but you can see how much they love each other in the tenderness of their touches

they both cry a lot over movies, especially when they are together in the comfort of their home. Animated movies are the worst, they make these two nerds cry like babies. They were an absolute mess after watching Coco

They love making blanket nests to cuddle. They take all the blankets and pillows in the house and then they snuggle, or they kiss, or they just read together enjoying the silence

They scare new people, especially when they are together, thanks to their teasing and their height. However, people usually realize pretty quickly that they are (mostly) harmless

They have a lot of plants all around their apartment, and they are extremely meticulous when taking care of them, especially Kuroo. Oikawa gets sad every time one of them dies

They are one of those couples who have an Instagram account together and everyone hates them for it

But, despite how cheesy and sappy they may get, you can feel how genuine their love is, and their friends all agree on the fact that they are made for each other

#I hope you enjoyed my trashy hcs #sorry for any typos #feel free to point them out #maybe I will update this list in the future #I'm Oikuroo trash and I'm not even sorry #accept this dumpster fire pls #haikyū!!#haikyuu!!#oikawa tooru #kuroo tetsurō #kuroo tetsurou #oikuroo

67 notes · View notes

dopescotlandwarrior · 5 years

Text

The Dancer-Chapter Two

Previous chapter on AO3 A special thanks to @statell for all your help

Chapter Two

In the absence of maintaining her little book shop, Claire’s swelling bank account allowed her to move into a townhouse with a large main room that she kept unfurnished. Floor to ceiling mirrors lined two walls and custom lighting allowed her to turn up the ambiance to practice new dance routines. A lifetime of frugal living still governed her lifestyle and there was ample money left to hire a private instructor to continue coaching her.

Madu was an Egyptian, born into a family of dancers who followed the traditional dance of the gypsies. He was the real deal and cousin to the studio owner who first took Claire under her wing. His first lesson was very harsh, she was sore for a week and his continued assault of her musculoskeletal system took her to the brink of quitting him. When she was clearly trying to find the words to tell him nicely, he ordered her into several poses with rapid changes, then turned the music on. He asked for the most difficult movements and pushed her to do them perfectly. Claire was shocked she could perform many of the movements used by competition belly dancers, and the bigger picture was revealed to her.

Madu turned up the volume of her sex appeal with instruction in using her eyes to add mystery and allure. Claire struggled through this, but not because it was hard. When Madu demonstrated the classic looks, Claire lost it and laughed until she begged him to stop acting like a woman in love. He was completely ridiculous acting like a seductive woman, but Claire finally nailed the eye movements he was after. Claire’s favorite new moves were athletic and fun, easily incorporated into any routine to heighten the energy of the crowd or break the sexual tension when needed.

“You are not a stripper Claire. You do the exotic dance of gypsies for entertainment not for…” Madu was stumbling to find an appropriate word for erection while staring at his crotch. It was yet another moment when Claire lost her mind dissolving in giggles.

Arms were Madu’s focus for several weeks until she could move them as if she had no elbows. He was a great teacher and his perfectionism fit Claire’s personality like a custom glove. In addition to her dance instruction, Madu added running five miles, four days per week to help her breathing.

If Claire became winded, he would stop the lesson and point to her heaving chest and quivering stomach. Disgusted with her weakness, the lesson would be cut short with the teacher leaving abruptly. Claire would hit the streets and push herself to run faster and farther, day after day, just to see the approval on his face. It was a love, hate relationship and Claire blossomed under his instruction.

Jamie watched the paper for book club advertisements or any other activity that was literature centric. Where are ye, Claire? I know ye canna stay away from books so ye got to surface eventually. He wondered if she left Edinburgh but continued to search for signs of her, week after week, hoping to find she had landed on her feet.

Jamie continued to visit the restaurant, at least once a week, to watch the dancer. He noticed the changes in her movements and felt her beckon him like a siren to a sailor. The first night she showed her face he almost had a heart attack. It was unexpected and felt intensely personal.

The headpieces and scarves that hid Claire’s face were difficult to wear and she was losing patience with using them. Still, if Jamie Fraser was in the audience, she covered her lower face. During one performance, Claire’s face scarf was accidentally pulled off while she danced in front of Jamie. She was horrified and watched his face with mounting fear of being discovered. There was no recognition in his eyes, so she stopped covering her face with great relief.

Somehow, enticing Jamie with her erotic dance and ignoring his requests to speak with her mollified her need to stab him in the heart. When she felt extra hateful toward him, she would dance very close and slip her finger into her bra, pinching her nipple so he would see her reaction. Only he would see it and Claire could torture him with this movement whenever she needed to.

Claire was the vengeful and punishing dancer, Jamie was hopelessly obsessed with her. Neither of them realized how twisted and abnormal this dynamic was.

Jamie sat at his desk pondering his six months of searching for the little bookseller. Maybe she married her high school boyfriend and moved to the country to raise a houseful of bairns. Or maybe she moved to London where she would find like-minded readers to share her love of the classics. He told himself to give up trying to find her. In a last-ditch effort, he placed an ad for a Charles Dickens book club, the location of which was yet to be decided.

Over the following week, Jamie received a handful of inquiries to his anonymous posting. He looked through the names of the interested and brushed them into his desk drawer feeling his quest to find Claire was finally quelled. He might always wonder what happened to her, but he was ready to change her status to someone he once knew. He headed out to catch the early show at Omar’s and get lost in his fantasies.

It was two weeks later when an inquiry for the book club passed over his desk. He read the short response of interest and his eyes landed on the signature, Claire Beauchamp.

“There ye are Sassenach,” he said quietly.

This would require the aid of his sister and maybe a friend of hers to break the ice with Claire, so she didn’t run away at the sight of him. He picked up the phone to recruit Jenny’s help while drafting a notice for the first meeting of the Dickens book club.

“You want me to what?”

“Tell this girl I’ve been lookin for, that I want to speak with her, so she doesna run away at the sight of me.”

“Ye may have lost yer touch with the lassie's brother but ye willna get any help from me,” she scoffed.

“She lost her bookstore when the Edinburgh store opened. She is very young and sweet, and I’ve become obsessed with finding her.”

“The clubs in the city suddenly empty out of lasses?”

“I dinna want to date her or spend time with her Jenny. I just want to know she’s alright. If I can help her I will. Please, Jenny, try to understand that I canna let this go, canna let her go, knowing what I took from her. If she can just tell me she’s fine and landed on her feet, I’ll have no need to speak to her again.

Claire arrived at the designated coffee shop with a Tale of Two Cities tucked under her arm. She was excited to see three women sitting together, open books in front of them, talking animatedly. She felt her soul curl up with a well-worn blanket to enjoy this classic novel with new friends.

“Hello, my name is Claire, I am here for the book club meeting.”

Jenny’s smiling eyes lifted to a face of innocence, bright golden-brown eyes, and ivory skin that hosted not a drop of makeup. Her smile was trusting and sincere and it was clear to Jenny why she had haunted her brother.

After the introductions, the two other women left the table leaving Claire alone with Jenny. Jenny watched her nervous eyes dart around the coffee shop and did her best to corral Claire with a quick explanation.

“Dinna fear lass, this meetin is for yer benefit and I’ll tell ye why. Seven months ago, my brother was ordered to open a store in Edinburgh which caused yer bookstore to close from the competition. He has looked for ye ever since to make sure yer alright. Please, Claire, hear him out before he loses his mind. It might help heal a part of ye also.”

Claire’s heart was pounding. This woman could only be referring to Jamie Fraser, and what was this nonsense about his concern for her? She clutched her book intending to leave but when she stood there was a brick wall behind her.

“Please Claire”. Will ye talk with me for just a few minutes?”

He was blocking her exit so there was only one way to move, back into her chair.

Jenny smiled sweetly at Claire as she vacated the seat. Jamie claimed it and was now facing Claire across the table.

“I swear on my sweet mother’s grave I only want to talk to you. Make sure yer alright, that you found yer way. I promise I willna bother ye again.”

Claire looked up at Jamie’s eyes and felt like crying because they were so desperate.

“You have five minutes Mister Fraser.”

Jamie’s voice was soft and gentle as he inquired about her life, her new job, and her hobbies. He just wanted to keep her talking until she could relax and see him with new eyes. Not of an enemy but someone who sincerely wanted to help her, if she needed it.

Slowly, Claire opened her mind to this unexpected inquiry and assured him she was fine and working a new job she loved. Jamie seemed okay that she didn’t share the details of where she worked because he could see in her face how much she loved it. They shared a second coffee and Jamie finally let go of his guilt about forcing her to lose her business.

Claire had danced inches from this man on so many nights as she worked through her hatred and need to hurt him back. She found it difficult to connect that man with the one across the table as their conversation continued. She watched his eyes and his smile, feeling sad that this was a one-time meeting. Her enemy had a sincere desire to see her healthy and healed from his assault on her life. She forced herself to relax for just a few minutes and bask in the attention of Jamie Fraser.

“Well, I should go, Mister Fraser. I don’t hate you anymore and I appreciate your concern for me, but I am just fine.”

“Your people are lost without ye Claire.”

“What?”

“The customers that joined yer book clubs and school reading program are comin to me to facilitate such things and I dinna have a clue. There is a need for ye and I want to offer ye a job and all the space and support ye need to bring those programs back to Edinburgh. I pay pretty well too.”

Claire could feel the blush burn her cheeks while her heart swelled with the sentiment of her old customers.

“I…I couldn’t Mister Fraser. I’m no longer in the book business.”

Claire pushed her chair out to leave and offered her hand to Jamie. He shook it, slipping his card into her hand he asked her to think about it. The offer was open.

Jamie watched Claire walk to her car and wondered why she wouldn’t divulge the job she was doing now. Something was different about her. Her clothing and hair were the same, but she had a more confident air about her. It was a positive improvement he decided and hurried back to work.

The seatbelt clicked and Claire exhaled a long breath. Maybe she would consider the job and stay close to her beloved books. Maybe her heart would finally thaw out and she could feel normal again. She had lived like a training Olympian for the past six months, dedicated to dancing and training because it felt safe. She looked at his card, I’ll just add this to the stack on my counter, she thought miserably.

Driving home she tried to decide if she was happy during the last six months. She had made great gains with her dancing, moved into a better neighborhood, made very good money, and had her best friend, Geillis. She realized she moved through her days going from one obligation to the next and even if those obligations made her money or improved her skill, they were still obligations. What is the opposite of an obligation? What is the true form or feeling of happiness? She considered these questions for the next several days and finally decided she didn’t know. Maybe it was time she found out.

Claire made a list of all the activities that sounded fun and threw a small notebook in her glove box in case she thought of something while driving. She compiled her list over the weekend and there was a total of three activities. Fishing, camping, hiking and she was only guessing at the fun part because she really didn’t know.

“Christ, if I die tomorrow, I will have lived twenty-two years and never had fun,” she mumbled.

Claire ran to answer her ringing doorbell and a box was thrust into her hand, Madu was on the other side of it.

“It’s a gift from my cousin.”

Claire pulled the top off and gasped at the beautiful hair inside. It was a waist-length human hair wig that she slipped on and felt instantly transformed into a beautiful, exotic, woman. She pulled a comb through the luxurious hair and giggled with delight.

Geillis played with the hair while Claire got ready for work that evening. The sight of Geillis twitching her hips and moving her arms like a hula dancer with the wig puckering at the crown of her head made Claire lose it. She couldn’t stop laughing until she was kneeling on the ground holding her stomach. Geillis scoffed and pulled a panting Claire to the door.

Well, she thought, that was fun.

Geillis helped twist the long hair into a complex top knot that would fall out when she rolled her head, letting the curls tumble down her back as she spun. It was time.

Claire pressed her back against the dressing room door, wrists crossed above her head and waited for the spotlight. The music started with just a wood flute, soft and slow, like the music that pulled the cobra out of his basket. Her eyes were downcast as her body undulated softly. As the music rose in tempo and complexity, her eyes flew open with fear and darted around the room in mock terror. Attempting to push away she looked up at what held her to the door and suddenly threw her body away from the invisible bonds as she twirled, arms out, showing the joy of freedom on her face. Arms wide at her sides she spun across the floor lined with tables until she came to rest in the middle of the room.

Madu’s voice was in her head, “You are alone and free to dance as your joyous heart demands. What would that dance look like?”

Claire’s eyes were downcast watching her hip lift suddenly. A slight smile and she looked at the other hip lift. Back and forth she looked at each hip lift higher and faster. She spread her arms with a huge smile as her body launched into a head-spinning routine of all the classic moves of the belly dancer holding the diners spellbound. She twirled back to the stage door and was once again bound at her raised wrists. She looked up in mock horror and the spotlight went out.

Jamie watched the dancer against the door. He could hardly breathe when she tried to escape but could not. He filled his lungs when she twirled over and over again once free. The hair came tumbling down and bounced with her movements. She had never looked so beautiful and he felt he would explode if she didn’t speak to him.

He handed Omar his card and a hundred-dollar bill and before he could stop himself, he asked for an introduction to the dancer.

“Omar, would ye consider introducing me to your daughter? I have tried, each time I come to see her dance, but she willna reply to my request.”

Omar looked up at Jamie, one of his best customers, and cleared his throat. He was never blessed with a daughter but had come to feel like a father with Claire. If she led this man to believe she was his daughter there was a good reason for it.

Jamie licked his lips in nervous desperation, “is she promised to someone? Is she not allowed to speak to the patrons? Will she ever speak with me?”

Omar was searching his mind for the right response. One that would protect Claire and keep Jamie coming around to watch her. “It is not our custom,” a long pause, “but you never know.” He vaporized into his office leaving Jamie more confused than ever.

As autumn turned to the bitter cold of winter, Claire was running in snow and slush and the humid cold dipped into the single digits. She rounded the corner of her last mile and felt her legs lock up and turn to concrete. She slowed to a difficult walk gasping for breath. She had to get warm or feared she would die, as every step got harder. The nearest building was the new bookstore and she lunged for it as it spun in front of her. Once inside she bent over, hands on knees, hoping the spinning would stop as the floor came up to smack her cheek.

Claire felt her body was being jostled as she returned to consciousness. She was leaning against a large muscular chest so someone must be carrying her. A door closed and she felt a soft couch under her. She kept her eyes closed, more for nausea than a desire to stay hidden behind her lids. Her gloves were pulled off and someone blew warm air against her fingers.

Claire opened her eyes to Jamie, crouched on the floor trying to warm up her hands.

“Jamie Fraser.”

“Oh, good yer awake, ye scared me half to death lass. Dinna move yet. How do ye feel, should I call an ambulance?”

“Certainly not! I am fine, just a little dizzy. I am sorry for the drama, but your store was the closest warm building and I knew I was in trouble. I..I’m really very sorry.”

“Dinna move yet Sassenach! Please stay there for a few minutes. What happened to ye?”

“What did you just call me?” Claire’s voice was soft and questioning and she could see Jamie blush.

“Sassenach. It means …outsider…because of yer accent. Yer no a Scot is what I mean.”

“Maybe if I was, I wouldn’t pass out after running three miles in the cold.”

Claire inched her way into a sitting position and took a deep breath, feeling better but not well enough to run herself home. Jamie kept telling her to stay put so she did, enjoying a lovely chat with this interesting man. He fed her cookies and coffee until the color came back to her face. When Claire glanced at her watch and almost shot off the couch reaching for her phone.

“Madu! I am so sorry! I passed out halfway through my run today and I’m at the new bookstore in town. Can you come and get me? Yes, I’m alright, my friend here saved me with cookies and coffee. What? No! I did not say cookies. Why, did you hear cookies? She laughed weakly and dropped her phone into her coat pocket. She smiled at Jamie.

“Thank you for the rescue Jamie but I am out of your hair. She shook his hand and feasted on the bluest eyes she had ever seen, “goodbye.”

Jamie watched Claire from his upstairs office until a car pulled up to take her away. No cookies, he thought, what kind of life is that?

Jamie wanted desperately to watch the dancer tonight, but he was just there last night. He worried about his obsession with her and pushed back with a limit of once per week. The night before she had dropped backward like she was made of rubber and he felt her head on his shoulder. It took him several minutes to breathe normally again.

“Who are ye lass, and why won’t ye speak to me?”

A month later Claire was bobbing through crowds of shoppers as she ran through the retail district of Edinburgh. She couldn’t wait for the holidays to end so she could have her solitary run back. She launched into a sprint and heard her name called in the distance. She turned to see Jenny Fraser and friends, arm waving over her head with a big smile.

“Claire! Come say hello!”

Claire smiled and jogged back to the group and Jenny. Four women about her age were all smiles and warmth, talking about Christmas and Hogmanay. Claire was swept away by the welcoming women and allowed herself to sit and chat over hot cocoa. She could hear Madu in her mind listing the evils of sugar and became increasingly agitated until she broke away from the group and started running again. It felt like she was transported to a town in a Rockwell painting where she would have friends like Jenny and weight gain from Christmas treats was her biggest concern. Maybe someday she thought.

Getting back to her townhouse she added something to her list of fun activities on the refrigerator. “Having Cocoa with friends.” Her list was growing. There were now six activities.

Jamie struggled through Christmas day at Lallybroch. His anxiety felt like an army of ants had invaded his legs, biting him without mercy. When supper was over and cleaned up, he took off for the Bookstore to catch up on some work. Try as he might, the oppressive walls were closing in on him before a single report was read. It was useless to continue his fake reading, so he grabbed his coat and walked the streets, looking in store windows and letting his thoughts wander. Someone ran past him, billowing steam from panting and running quickly away.

“Claire!”

She stopped and turned around but all he could see was a white smile deep inside her hood. He caught up to her and putting his arm around her they walked together. Claire was really happy to have a diversion on this lonely day and night. She needed company and for a time Jamie was a dream come true. They pointed and joked about what was displayed in shop windows and Jamie asked a lot of questions that she couldn’t answer. He finally gave up to enjoy the respite offered by little Claire tagging along.

“I will respect yer privacy Sassenach, no more questions about yer job or where ye live. Can I ask why ye run all the time, and without cookies! So, tell me the truth of it, squirt.”

Claire looked up at Jamie and felt a friendship that she knew was real, still, all she could do is laugh and shrug her shoulders just before she took off to run home.

“Wait! Have ye thought any more about the job?”

Claire was jogging backward so she could see him, “I’ll do it!” Said laughing, before she turned around to run home.

Jamie watched her until her form was little more than a dark mark on the horizon. It was getting quite cold, so he turned toward the bookstore to head home.

Now that the distraction of Claire was gone, the shrouded mystery dancer spun in his head and Jamie felt his anger rage. Get out of my head, he thought, I’m tired of livin like this and I’m tired of you. Jamie forced her out of his thoughts and instead took a hard look at what was becoming a real problem. His constant presence at the restaurant, stalking her in the parking lot, shelling out at least four-hundred-dollars a month and losing interest in any other part of his life. Jamie pulled his truck to the side of the dirt road he lived on and looked straight ahead at Lallybroch.

He stayed in that position like he had been turned to stone. All the supporting evidence of his ill-placed obsession ran through his mind over and over until his head pounded. The obvious answer was to stop seeing her, cold turkey. She refused to speak to him for months and his continued pursuit was pure folly, if not illegal. He exhaled a long, sad, breath and promised himself he would see a therapist if he could not stop on his own.

“Christ, I need a twelve-step program for belly dancer watchin. A new low for ye Jamie boy,” he said to the air, and finished his miserable ride home.

Jenny was in the living room bundled into a blanket on the couch with her phone in hand, laughing and texting one of her gang. Jamie sat down and sighed rubbing his hands on his jeans. His sister saw his miserable face and put her phone down.

“I know ye’ve been possessed by some problem lately. Is this a sign yer ready to talk about it?”

Jamie looked at sweet Jenny’s face for a full minute before speaking. “I have a problem Jen and it’s gonna ruin my life if I don’t find a way out. Let me tell ye what I’ve done.”

Jamie talked for thirty minutes, pouring his heart out and leaving no secrets. Jenny had never heard more than a handful of sentences out of her brother in one sitting so she made not a peep during this momentous confession. She wiped at tears in her eyes twice, feeling her brother had been duped out of his money and time by swindling gypsies.

Jenny was furious. The boy who walked her home from school each day, taught her how to drive, took her shopping for her prom dress and held her up during their father's funeral was hurting. He was the king of men to Jenny and she was rocked to the core with hatred for this belly dancer.

50 notes · View notes

leggomylino · 5 years

Text

light switch 2 | yandere!seungmin

Genre: Yandere, romance/fluff (sorta?), thriller, a little angst, some comedy

Pairing(s): yandere!Seungmin x reader

Word count: ~8k

Warnings: Author rambling, run-on sentences, mild language (censored), a few memes, moments of high tension and possible anxiety, ooc, and mild abuse/violence

A/N: Requests are open! | Masterlist in bio! | I told you guys I was working on this!! Lol I’m so sorry it took so long! :(( But, nevertheless, here it is! ...And yes, there’s a surprise waiting for you at the end... >u>” Enjoy!! And please be sure to tell me what you think! c: I love hearing from you all~ <3 (For those of you that missed it, part one can be found here)

Oh my gosh it’s finally back

Can you believe it’s finally back

Seriously what took this chick {author} so long to write this sh*t wtfudge man

Okay okay I know I’m sorry

It’s been really chaotic and I’ve had a lot on my plate (and mind) but we’re finally back now and that’s all that matters

My question to you all is

ARE YOU READY TO FINISH THIS THING?!

(enter your response here)

...THEN YEEHAW LET’S GO

Okay so

To recap:

AT A CERTAIN DANDY BOY™ HOUSE

Your mother had just made a phone call to Seungmin asking to talk to you

She wanted to remind you to bring the mail inside before y’all got too comfortable and side-tracked since you told her you were at Minnie’s (a fatal error on your part) and she and your father are out of town on a cliche business trip

Things always go wrong during cliche business trips

Anyway Minnie was pretty confused at first but he caught on pretty quickly that something was up

Something rotten in the state of Your Town Name Here

And knowing that you must have lied he decided to play along, beginning to gather the materials he needed

*cue ominous soap opera music*

“......”

“...Seungmin? Is everything alright?” Her voice is growing more and more worried with each consonant. “Where’s (y/n)?”

“......”

He laughs.

Just laughs for a moment, shaking his head.

“...Yeah, yes, she’s here. Sorry, my connection has been on the fritz lately.”

“O-Oh, I see...can I talk to her?”

“She’s in the bathroom getting cleaned up right now. I’ll have her call you as soon as she’s out...”

He paces over to the blinds, peeking out into the neighborhood from his second story window. Like a lot of cliche villains or suspicious people do. “...but it may be a while. You know how long she takes just to brush her teeth.”

Mrs. (L/n) gives a relieved, but still somewhat nervous chuckle, sighing at the end to ease her tension. “Yes, I certainly do. Thanks so much, Minnie. I know I can count on you to take good care of my little girl.”

“Yes...” He smiles, nuzzling the phone between his ear and shoulder as he’s scouring his room for things: a bottle labeled “Witch Hazel”, some cloth, a copy of his dad’s car key...as well as an additional key he never thought he’d get to use until now. “You can always count on me. I promise she’ll be out like a light before the clock strikes twelve.”

“That’s a relief. In that case just tell her to bring the mail in, would you? Thanks again!”

“It’s not a problem. Good night, Mrs. (L/N).”

“You too dear.”

Beep. He hangs up.

Looks back out the window. Sighs.

It wouldn’t be a problem at all.

“...at least, not for long.”

~~~

Back at Lucas’ house...well really, your imagination...you’re having a nightmare you used to have as a child

You’re walking down the street, minding your own business...

When all of a sudden the sky turns red, then black

The faces of the people around you turn sinister; they look like they want to hurt you

You begin to run as fast as you can, but your whole body is weighed down, like gravity is twice as strong on you

But not on anyone else

So while the people who are slowly turning into monsters are gaining on you

All you can do is cower in fear and pray that it will be over quickly

But then there’s a burst of white light

Like a light switch has been flipped on

And the ground crumbles beneath you, bursts of white shining through the cracks

And you go tumbling down into the earth

Down

Until you land into a pair of soft, strong arms

Your face instantly buries into the figure’s chest, because you know you can trust him

He smells sweet, like lavender and fresh Spring daisies

It’s a calming, pleasing scent

And all the monsters who were chasing you before vanish as they fall into the crumbling Earth, disintegrating into nothing but ash that’s carried someplace far, far away

You look up to see who your savior is

It’s never the same person

At first it was your dad; then it was your sixth grade crush; a couple times it was the cute actor from your favorite movie

But this time, and sadly like the last five times you’ve had this dream since you started high school...that person is none other than Kim Seungmin

He’s looking so ...

There isn’t a word for it

His edges are soft

So are his eyes

And he’s looking at you like you’re responsible for hanging the moon in the sky and making all the stars glow

He has such high expectations for you

From you

That you’re afraid to let him down

To tell him the truth

You aren’t God, after all

But...

......

You just—

“gaAAAAAHHH—!!!”

!!?!?!!!?!

What the heck was that?!?

Your eyes shoot open to the sound of someone crying out

It sounds like a man’s voice...

And it’s nearby

You’re stunned into shock for a few seconds before you can get your body to move, and when you do you grip the plushie in your arms against your chest—

Wait, plushie...?

You look down.

Your eyes are adjusting while a struggle is clearing going on outside

It’s the plushie that Seungmin gave you

The one from your house; you know it is bc it smells like your bedroom

But you didn’t bring this with you...

You’re scared, but you quickly throw yourself out from the safety of the tent—

And immediately wish you hadn’t

The window beside the bed is open

A cold draft blowing in

Lucas is pinned down, struggling

The shadowy figure above him

Is none other

Than Kim Seungmin

He’s ripping something off of his belt-

It’s a syringe

He stabs it into Lucas’ arm with a curse, and not but two seconds later the boy is little more than a vegetable; no longer moving, barely breathing

Holy sh*t

I mean

Holy sh*t--

You gotta bounce sis

You gotta MOVE

Seungmin tosses a bottle of some clear liquid aside in anger, and it spills open in the middle of the floor

The smell hits you pretty quickly; it smells of lavender and fresh daisies

Just like in your dream/nightmare

It makes you feel a bit woozy upon inhaling it

But you don’t completely pass out

Which apparently is what Minnie was going for

There’s a thump as Seungmin jumps to the floor

And you’re scared

Actually, saying you’re scared is an understatement

This is pretty freaking serious man

You don’t think you can meme your way through this one

You can’t move

You just kneel there outside your tent in shock, trying to convince yourself this is one of those nightmares that stems from another; you simply woke up into a new dream is all

But it’s not so

Something in your heart is telling you

This is real life

Seungmin is doing something...

He’s...filling another syringe

Now that your eyes have adjusted, you can see he’s completely surpassed resting b*tch mode

He’s gone off the deep end. Like, he’s really gone this time

Looking so serious and genuine, so certain about what he’s doing...

Yet having lost all the light in his eyes

“Now, (y/n)...I need you to be good and take this for me.”

Uhhhh

No thanks bro that’s okay

P h A t pass on that one man

Phattest pass, phattest pass

You get your legs to finally work as he’s approaching you, scurrying towards the door and only stopping when your back hits against it, because dammit all, he’s still too fast for you

Seungmin is just right there man

He’s got you trapped

His fingers brush over the soft palate of your arm, gently feeling about for a vein

Apparently he wants to be more careful and professional when he drugs you

For whatever reason

You’re back to being immobilized

It’s like your feet are stuck in blocks of cement

Oh dear Lord you’re gonna die ಥ_ಥ

This is it

He wants you dead

He’s gonna throw you and Lucas into some twisted vegetable soup and that’s going to be the end of it

And you may have thought that had it not been for the blue and red sirens flashing outside

Minnie turns around mid-prodding, an obvious cringe on his face, and then suddenly he’s tackled to the ground by none other than Big Brother of the Year Lucas oh praise Jesus you may live after all

Wow this guy is your hero

He’s weak and there’s blood all over his face, his breath heavy as he heaves out desperate words to you

“.....(y/n)........g-get out...s-side.........cops....will take...care of y-you...”

Welp, he don’t have to tell you twice

Through all this, he’s still trying to protect you. He’d been drugged, his face cut into, beaten senseless without warning, yet he was still trying to save you...like a guardian angel or something

...Wow, maybe the author should have made this a Seungmin x reader x Lucas instead hubba hubba

But unfortunately she’s spaghetti and swamped with updates so we’ll never know 🤪🍝

You fling yourself out the door and down the stairs as some officers have just broken down the front door, and you don’t grab no shoes or nothing Lord, you r u n outta that place, choosing to consult with a kind-looking female cop that’s waiting outside on standby

Frantically you gush out what’s going on as best you can, even though you’re not so sure what’s going yourself

Most importantly, you’re sure to tell her that Lucas is hurt first. He needs immediate medical attention from what you gathered in the faint street light pouring in the open window

She comforts you and assures you that they’re handling it, all the while wishing and hoping and praying with every fiber in your being you’ll wake up soon, any minute now...

...but unfortunately, you never do. The reality hits you when Lucas is carried out on a stretcher and Seungmin is forced out in handcuffs.

~~~

You’re at the hospital with Lucas

Seungmin really did a number on him; after beating him black and blue, he pulled out a knife and nearly blinded him

Luckily it was dark and Lucas put up one heck of a fight. He wasn’t on three sports teams for nothing.

He’d put up such a defensive display that Seungmin had just missed his left eye...sadly, though, he got the right one

Lucas lost half his eyesight because of you

You don’t know what to say...what to think, even

If only you hadn’t gone over there. If only you’d just stayed home...or...or maybe...

You swallow as tears begin to fall. What the heck were you supposed to do? You’d had no idea this would happen. You didn’t know things had gotten this bad...

...but you also kind of did

The poem? It was a warning

A threat

You’d been given a heads up long before, and you’d chosen to play dumb and ignore it

And now Lucas would have to be called Patchy for the rest of his life

The only Halloween options he’d ever have are Pirate or...parrot with an eyepatch

And it was all your fault

Thank God Seungmin had been arrested…

...Wait

Seungmin--

Omgosh

He’d been arrested. Kim Seungmin had been arrested.

Why was this just now hitting you so ha--

“Oh my gosh, my baby! (Y/n)!!”

Oop. Mama (Y/n) in the house.

Your mother comes charging in like a swarm of bees, enveloping you in her arms but also giving you a bit of a sting for lying to her like you did. Lucas’ parents had caught them up to speed already, your father glaring angrily but thankfully from the doorway.

After hugging them both and explaining everything from your point of view, they agree to give you a few more minutes alone with Lucas before you’re grounded young lady no TV no video games no books well okay reading is important for your future but nothing enjoyable and no dessert. They also plan to have a serious discussion with you about Kim Seungmin as well. Great.

Not wanting to let you go your father drags your mom out, her protestant whimpering echoing down the hall and they retreat to discuss things further with Lucas’ parents.

Oi vey

What has all of this come to? What are you even doing? How did things get this bad…?

You turn your head slowly from across the room, examining the boy’s eye (or in some ways lack thereof) as you make your way back, settling carefully into the chair beside him.

𝑊𝑖𝑡𝘩 𝑐𝑎𝑟𝑒𝑓𝑢𝑙 𝑡𝘩𝑜𝑢𝑔𝘩𝑡

𝐴𝑛𝑑 𝑡𝑖𝑒𝑠 𝑡𝘩𝑎𝑡 𝑏𝑖𝑛𝑑

𝑆𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟 𝑡𝘩𝑒 𝑏𝑜𝑛𝑑𝑠

𝐵𝑒𝑓𝑜𝑟𝑒 𝑡𝘩𝑒𝑦 𝑔𝑜 𝑏𝑙𝑖𝑛𝑑...

...You now hate poetry

You’ll never read another sonnet ever again

“Hmn…”

Lucas is waking up

It’s now five o’clock in the morning

You’re both dead tired, but you can only imagine how he must be feeling, being the one in the hospital bed…

……

...This is seriously all your fault

You hate yourself for it

You just

You just…

Ping!

There’s a text on your phone. You choose to ignore it, of course. Lucas is way more important right now than some Instagram or trivial weather update

Tenderly you reach, taking Lucas’ hand...or start to. You hover over it, wondering if you even deserve to be...if you even…

A warmth envelopes your fingers as Lucas takes them weakly into his own, the faintest smile present on his face. He carefully reaches up to pat the white surgical tape and bandages over the upper right half of his face.

“...It’s never going to get any better, is it?” he asks.

You practically jump at the question: “No, it will. It definitely will.”

...Lying to him in order to not cause him any more panic is the best you can do for him now. Pathetic, but it’s better to remain hopeful, at least until he can handle it later.

His smile turns sad as he gazes at you with his one good eye.

“I meant for you.”

……

“......”

You slowly shake your head no

He sighs, turning towards the fluorescent lights on the ceiling that have been dimmed to allow the patient on the other side to sleep. “I’m so sorry, (y/n). This is my fault. I should have just brought you to the police station, and they would have handled it professionally right then and there. I didn’t think...things had gotten this bad.” He squeezed with what little strength he had. “But I’m really glad you’re okay. Did he hurt you at all?”

……………

This man

Was lying in a hospital bed

Drugged

Bruised to a bloody pulp

He’d permanently lost sight in one eye

And he was worried

About you

So author, what was that about no love triangle going on here??

Smh

The only thing you can do is look downward, at the nightstand, the bedding, the far wall...anywhere that isn’t Lucas’ face right now

You don’t have it in you to accept his incredible kindness and heroic humility. You don’t even bother answering his question, except to mutter out, “thank you.”

~~~

So what’s going on with Seungmin now?

Well, glad you asked

Cause you were just about to find out from a friendly sit down with three guest stars on the (Y/n)’s Chaotic Life show: Mom, Dad, and Officer Jenny

...No, not from the Pokemon TV series. Though you had to admit, the resemble was almost uncanny...not that this was anytime for jokes

“So,” Officer Jenny asks, pen and notepad in hand, “I’m sure you must be feeling many things right now, but let’s start from the beginning, if that’s alright. When did this all start?”

Your mom and dad just shared a look before turning to you, your mother gingerly patting and rubbing your knee. “Go ahead, sweetheart. Take your time.”

You take a deep breath and tell her everything you know. From the moment you first met Kim Seungmin, to the moment you first noticed him changing, to the events of some twenty-four hours ago. Your mother and father gave their piece as well, though really they claimed to be completely in the dark to any of Minnie’s chaotic and violent behavior, insisting he was always a sweet and well-behaved boy for as long as they’d know him. It was quite a shock finding out what he’d done.

Minnie…

…

Did you even still call him that? Would you? Could you?

He was practically a murderer. A complete psychopath. And you still had no idea why…

“So what do you think brought out this behavioral change?”

Your head snapped up from where it’d dropped downward, spacing out after having contributed your part of the story

Mom and Dad were glaring at you. Officer Jenny was waiting patiently.

But you had no idea what to say

Because you didn’t know

You didn’t

You didn’t…

...Did you?

Idiot.

바보

Does this sound familiar?

“...I can’t do this anymore, (y/n)...not if you’re not going to listen to me or do as I say. It’s driving me crazy. Don’t you get it? Don’t you f***ing see how I feel about you? Have you really been so dense this whole f***ing time?!?”

“(Y/n). I need to know...tell me, do you…”

“...Do you feel the same way?”

...The part that scared you

The part that really scared you

Was that

You didn’t know…

~~~

That night

After the talk show was wrapped up and everything was out in the open

Officer Jenny reassured your family that you were safe staying at home

Seungmin had been captured and a few officers had done a thorough investigation on your house to make sure there were no cameras or bombs or anything fishy like that

So it was essentially safe and there was no need to go the extra mile of changing identities and moving across the country

Except well

If you’re new to this story

You’re in for a bit of a shock because

Of course the author likes to shake things up :D <3

It wouldn’t be a story without something going wrong

And (Y/n) was just about to find out what that something was

It didn’t happen suddenly that night

Some time had gone by, about a week, maybe a week and a half

You were still pretty shaken up over the whole thing, and stuck in a mental state of Twilight Zone

You knew it was real but your brain almost refused to accept and process it

It was like a never-ending nightmare, too farfetched to be true

Because Lucas had to remain in the hospital for further examination and therapy, you brought all his school work to him

You’d taken a few days off yourself and then insisted you were fine to go back

You needed something to distract you from the reality

But, in reality, it only made it worse in some ways, students swarming you with questions and facility repeatedly asking if you were alright or needed a break

The only place you were allowed to go was the Student Council room, and Lord knows you did NOT want to be alone in that place again

Even though the school had already granted Lucas an extended leave of absence, he insisted you bring him a copy of your homework so he could “keep up with his studies”

But

In reality, he just wanted an excuse to see you. And you liked seeing him as well. It was nice to be in his company and check up on him, and he felt the same

When you weren’t at the hospital visiting and quote-quote “studying” with Lucas, you were either going through the motions on autopilot at school or sitting in your room, doing anything and everything to erase what had happened

That was, of course, easier said than done though

Often you found it hard being at home. It didn’t feel safe anymore knowing Seungmin had been here, so many times before, in the very room you sat in. Laughing with you, smiling, comforting or taking care of you…

He was everywhere. His laughter practically filled the walls and echoed down the corridors, his smile reflected in every glass sheen of sunlight

And when the lights flipped off, so did his expression. It was like you were reliving that horrific night all over again

You had to break out of there, your house and your mind

So you went to the park with a couple of new friends you’d made, Felix and Changbin. They were just as surprised as anyone else to learn what had become of Seungmin, and they’d actually been the first ones to shelter you and protect your privacy on your first day back, when your classmates started popping out of the woodwork to drown you in questions and condolences

As you may or may not have guessed, you’d gotten a new phone, during the Officer Jenny visit, along with a new number

After sh*t had really hit the fan, though, you’d become much less social, only registering your parents, Officer Jenny’s number by request, Lucas, and the day after, Felix and Binnie. Despite your previous crush on Jaemin, that had all but flown out the window and exploded upon colliding with a powerline, and you’re pretty sure after he heard what happened, he probably felt the same

And anyway, again, you’d become much less social since the whole incident. You really didn’t feel like talking to anyone unless it was your parents or these three boys. Maybe Jenny if there was some kind of emergency, which you sincerely hoped there wouldn’t be

...I’m pretty sure that covers everything

Yeah

You were now at the park with Felix and Changbin

Just strolling aimlessly, you in the middle with Felix to your left and Binnie on the right

Your two bodyguards

Felix, you’d come to find out, was a professional at taekwondo, which was nice

And though Changbin was rather on the short side, just his looks and voice alone was intimidating enough

So you felt relatively safe in their company, taking a quiet stroll at sundown

The park was mostly vacant save for a few late-evening joggers or cyclist passing by

Birds and squirrels and other wildlife were just getting settled in their nests for the night, the owls and probably a raccoon or two taking their place

The three of you walked at a steady pace, hands behind your back or shoved in your pockets as you stared straight ahead, at the sidewalk, or the surrounding forest life

...It was peaceful but a little awkward

Probably because you all had the same thing on your minds

Something you all knew you needed to talk about, but had been avoiding to spare an awkward conversation

Instead now there was nothing but Awkward Silence™

“So,” Felix spoke up after your second and a half time around, smiling awkwardly. “How are you feeling today?”

Both boys looked at you. You gave them each a short stare in return before shrugging just as uncomfortably. You knew you needed to talk about Seungmin, but you’d left your house to escape him, not engage him elsewhere.

After a few more paces you noticed the two had fallen a bit behind, muttering to each other in hushed tones:

“She probably doesn’t wanna talk about this right now. Why did you bring it up?”

“Yeah...I dunno, I didn’t know how else to break it in. Sorry...”

“Apologize to her, not me! We’re trying to ease it in, not break her.”

“That’s what I said, bro.”

“...No, you said-- never mind, just go do something.”

“Like what?”

“Like apologize! Am I the only one that knows how girls operate?”

“...Says the man that’s been single the entire senior ye--”

“Shut up and go talk to her!!”

At that point you heard a shove behind you, and Felix came stumbling back up to your left, Binnie steadily catching back up on the right. He gave you a calm and peaceful smile while occasionally casting eyes at Felix expectantly.

Felix took a deep breath while he scratched the side of his head, looking up at the sky for a second before tossing his whole gaze down on you. It almost caught you off guard how intense and smoldering it all was

“(Y/n)...listen, Changbin and I were thinking-- …”

He opened his mouth, but no words came. Instead he pointed toward the restaurant district of town.

“...You wanna grab dinner after this?”

You blinked. Changbin facepalmed, a small groan escaping him.

But then all your stomachs growled, answering the question for you. You couldn’t help but smile, even just a little, as the other two laughed and the three of you headed off toward the nearby city lights.

Your phone gave a small ping! as a notification came up, but you failed to notice it thanks to the nearby rustling of what you assumed was active forest life, a stray cat or maybe a mouse

You had no idea how wrong you were.

~~~

I know, things are starting to get a little slow

Just bear with me, okay?

Cause we’re about to pick up big time

Spoiler alert?

Oops

Anyway

You were now sitting at a small, quiet, but decently populated restaurant

There were a fair number of customers but it wasn’t overcrowded at all, more of a cozy cafe styled place

It was the compromise Changbin insisted you all agree on, he being the most vocally worried about your mental state. He didn’t want you to be overwhelmed by all the noise and chaos of some famous barbecue joint or a popular family restaurant, so after you insisted you could handle it and would be fine (he had been pitching the idea of just grabbing some food to-go and heading back to his place), the boys let you pick a cafe you often passed by on the way to school but never got a chance to try

...until now

Ironically and thankfully they were a particularly special cafe that served dinner because the author said so yeehaw B))

So yes, you’re all sitting at a small booth off to the side, Changbin on one end, you and Felix curled up on the other. You order your food and as you’re waiting, Changbin and Felix are locked in some dumb debate about a few of their other friends while flicking straw wrappers back and forth. They tried to get you in on it at first but, seeing that you’re still in a weird place, decided to leave the invitation open if you wanted to join.

Everything is just so weird right now. You’re still in the Twilight Zone. It just doesn’t seem real at all…

The whole spectacle refuses to leave your mind. You’re coming to accept you can’t get away from it no matter what you try.

Kim Seungmin, from the moment you met him, has always been a part of you. And he always would be. It was just going to be weird from now on because...because…

Ping!

Your phone again?

Honestly it had kind of been doing that a lot before but you’ve been ignoring it because, again, you’re not much for talking to people right now. Or getting involved with any social media events or news flashes or...or uh…

……………………..

Huh??

There’s...a message. From Lucas?

Bro when did he get his phone back tho

You’d been communicating through his mum and the hospital when you weren’t there cause patients can’t have phones so like

Nani the heck??

Wait

Maybe this was good

Maybe he was being discharged early

The treatment had gone well and--

𝖫𝗎𝖼𝖺𝗌: 𝖧𝖾𝗒! 𝖨 𝗇𝖾𝖾𝖽 𝖺 𝖿𝖺𝗏𝗈𝗋.

Oh? A favor you say?

You were so there. You kinda owed Lucas your life after what happened.

𝖸𝗈𝗎: 𝖮𝖿 𝖼𝗈𝗎𝗋𝗌𝖾! 𝖶𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝖼𝖺𝗇 𝖨 𝖽𝗈 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗒𝗈𝗎?

𝖫𝗎𝖼𝖺𝗌: 𝖳𝗁𝖺𝗇𝗄𝗌 :) 𝖶𝗁𝖾𝗋𝖾 𝖺𝗋𝖾 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗋𝗂𝗀𝗁𝗍 𝗇𝗈𝗐?

𝖸𝗈𝗎: 𝖨’𝗆 𝖾𝖺𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗈𝗎𝗍 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝖺 𝖼𝗈𝗎𝗉𝗅𝖾 𝗈𝖿 𝖿𝗋𝗂𝖾𝗇𝖽𝗌.

𝖫𝗎𝖼𝖺𝗌: 𝖿𝗋𝗂𝖾𝗇𝖽𝗌?

𝖸𝗈𝗎: 𝖸𝖾𝖺𝗁 𝖼:

𝖫𝗎𝖼𝖺𝗌: 𝗐𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝖺𝗋𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗂𝗋 𝗇𝖺𝗆𝖾𝗌

> - > Bro why he wanna know tho--

Okay whatever

𝖸𝗈𝗎: 𝖥𝖾𝗅𝗂𝗑 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖢𝗁𝖺𝗇𝗀𝖻𝗂𝗇?

𝖸𝗈𝗎: 𝖨𝗌 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗇𝗈𝗍 𝗈𝗄𝖺𝗒 𝗅𝗈𝗅

𝖫𝗎𝖼𝖺𝗌: 𝗇𝗈 𝗇𝗈𝗍 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗅𝗅𝗒

………..

*gulp*

It’s not?

Why

Why isn’t this okay

𝖸𝗈𝗎: 𝖶𝗁𝗒 𝗇𝗈𝗍? :𝟢

𝖫𝗎𝖼𝖺𝗌: 𝖨 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗅𝗅𝗒 𝗇𝖾𝖾𝖽 𝗍𝗈 𝗌𝖾𝖾 𝗒𝗈𝗎

𝖫𝗎𝖼𝖺𝗌: 𝖢𝖺𝗇 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝖼𝗈𝗆𝖾 𝗋𝗂𝗀𝗁𝗍 𝗇𝗈𝗐?

𝖸𝗈𝗎: 𝖴𝗁, 𝗒𝖾𝖺𝗁 𝖨 𝗀𝗎𝖾𝗌𝗌? 𝖢𝖺𝗇 𝗂𝗍 𝗐𝖺𝗂𝗍 𝗍𝗂𝗅 𝖺𝖿𝗍𝖾𝗋 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖿𝗈𝗈𝖽 𝖼𝗈𝗆𝖾𝗌? 𝖨 𝖼𝖺𝗇 𝖻𝗋𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗌𝗈𝗆𝖾𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗂𝖿 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾

Lucas is typing a reply as your food is being set down, the boys cheering and mouths watering while all you can do is nervously glare at your new phone.

Seriously, what was wrong with Lucas? He wasn’t in danger, was he?

𝖫𝗎𝖼𝖺𝗌: 𝖨’𝖽 𝗋𝖺𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝗌𝖾𝖾 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗇𝗈𝗐. 𝖯𝗅𝖾𝖺𝗌𝖾. :(

…

Y’know, this don’t really sound like Lucas

All of this is hella sus sis

But you’re so worried about him anyway, and so distracted by the excuses running through your mind that he could be on medication or what if it really is an emergency that you instead grab your coat and are just about to tell Felix to yeet when something else catches your eye

Ooooooooh boy

Ooooooooh bro

Ooooooooh buddy

It’s uh

Well

All those previous notifications

They’re all news articles and the like, as you already had guessed they’d be

Most of them aren’t very important: Attorney so-and-so does this, City of Hoopla does that, Guy Catches Phone on Roller Coaster, band drops new album and it’s a huge hit, yada-yada-yada

But there’s this one

This one in particular

That nearly makes you break down and cry

I mean

You’re close to screaming sis

It’s pretty bad

You probably know what it is already

Yep: you guessed it

KXX News: Local Malefactor Escapes [Your Town] Jail; Police Baffled

...Okay

Y/n

Y/n--

Don’t freak out y/n

Deep breath sis

Deeeeeeeep breath

Breath nice and deep now…

Oop too late you’re already panicking

Hell I would too sis :( This is some bad juju

But

It’s going to be okay

...Maybe

I mean

You are kinda having a panic attack right now?

But don’t panic bc it’s going to be…

...you just passed out so I’ll be switching povs now

I’ll sort of summarize too since this is about you and - h i m - anyway

Basically you totally black out, the restaurant/cafe panics a bit (the few people who happen to notice) but Felix manages to catch you (thank goodness you were still seated at the booth so you just toppled over on his shoulder more or less)

In five seconds Binnie and Felix come up with a game plan where Felix carries you outside, trying to look as natural as possible, Binnie taking care of the check.

They argue and walk laps around the cafe about whether or not to take you home or the hospital

Home

Hospital

Home?

Hospital!

But when you start to come to, they agree it’s best to get you home to your mother

You fall in and out of consciousness all the way there, the only thing flooding your mind being the faintest scent of lavender and Spring: and Kim Seungmin.

~~~

You were honestly a little surprised when you finally woke up

You were sure seeing those words in that news headline, all in one coherent sentence, was going to be the death of you

I mean, he did want you dead, didn’t he?

He…

…

Sigh

You don’t know

You have no idea what’s really happening

A reoccuring theme in this story

You dunno

You just

Don’t

Know

:)))

But it’s going to be okay because--

Ping!

SCREECH \(ϾAϿ)/ 💦

Bro

Bro man

Your phone almost gave you a heart attack

A real one this time

Oof

Oi vey to hell and back

All of this is really getting to be too much man

You dunno if-- ...well

We done went over this already

You don’t know anything anymore 🙄😔

I mean

What even is life anyway??

You roll over on your bed to snatch the phone on your nightstand, an eerie feeling in your gut

Whether that’s from the fact you’re still recovering or you’re terrified it has something to do with everyone’s favorite Dandy Boy is a toss up

It could also have been the few nibbles of food you’d managed to have before zonking out…

...actually no scratch that, you were still pretty hungry. Which was a good sign, honestly

It meant you were already recovering well and most likely not gonna die

(ღ˘⌣˘)

That was always nice, y’know, not dying <3

So anyway

You glare at the lock screen in the dark, the brightness blinding you for a moment as you’re squinting and fumbling to turn it down

And when you do

You see there’s another message

A message from Lucas

Oop. You forgot about him in your whole fainting episode

Hope he’s okay--

𝖫𝗎𝖼𝖺𝗌: 𝖸/𝗇. 𝖸𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗆𝗈𝗆 𝖼𝖺𝗅𝗅𝖾𝖽 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗍𝗈𝗅𝖽 𝗆𝖾 𝗐𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗁𝖺𝗉𝗉𝖾𝗇𝖾𝖽. 𝖨 𝗁𝗈𝗉𝖾 𝗒𝗈𝗎’𝗋𝖾 𝗐𝖾𝗅𝗅. 𝖸𝗈𝗎 𝗀𝗈𝗍𝗍𝖺 𝗐𝖺𝗋𝗇 𝗌𝗈𝗆𝖾𝖻𝗈𝖽𝗒 𝖻𝖾𝖿𝗈𝗋𝖾 𝗒𝗈𝗎’𝗋𝖾 𝗀𝗈𝗇𝗇𝖺 𝗀𝗈 𝗌𝗄𝗂𝗍𝗓𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗈𝗎𝗍 𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗍, 𝗁𝖺𝗁𝖺

e-e

𝖸𝗈𝗎: 𝖨’𝗆 𝗌𝗈 𝗌𝗈𝗋𝗋𝗒, 𝖨 𝗉𝗋𝗈𝗆𝗂𝗌𝖾 𝖨’𝗆 𝗈𝗄𝖺𝗒

𝖸𝗈𝗎: 𝖣𝗈 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗌𝗍𝗂𝗅𝗅 𝗐𝖺𝗇𝗍 𝗆𝖾 𝗍𝗈 𝖼𝗈𝗆𝖾 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗌𝖾𝖾 𝗒𝗈𝗎?

It takes a minute for him to respond.

𝖫𝗎𝖼𝖺𝗌: 𝖭𝗈, 𝖽𝗈𝗇’𝗍 𝗐𝗈𝗋𝗋𝗒 𝖺𝖻𝗈𝗎𝗍 𝗂𝗍. 𝖸𝗈𝗎 𝗇𝖾𝖾𝖽 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗋𝖾𝗌𝗍.

And then…

𝖫𝗎𝖼𝖺𝗌: 𝖨’𝗅𝗅 𝖼𝗈𝗆𝖾 𝗍𝗈 𝗒𝗈𝗎.

…

Uhhh

He’ll what now?

𝖫𝗎𝖼𝖺𝗌: 𝖣𝗈𝗇’𝗍 𝗀𝗈 𝖺𝗇𝗒𝗐𝗁𝖾𝗋𝖾. 𝖨 𝗐𝗈𝗇’𝗍 𝖻𝖾 𝗅𝗈𝗇𝗀.

UHHH

wat

Sis honestly

what?

Lucas you ho what are you doin you’re sick

Sorta

You on them drugs boy

You needa be staying yer ass in bed so you can--

Ping!

Again?

Oh now what does this crazy bish want??

𝖫𝗎𝖼𝖺𝗌: 𝖲𝗈𝗋𝗋𝗒! 𝖩𝗎𝗌𝗍 𝗈𝗇𝖾 𝖿𝖺𝗏𝗈𝗋 𝖨 𝗇𝖾𝖾𝖽 𝖿𝗋𝗈𝗆 𝗒𝗈𝗎

Sure? What is it??

𝖸𝗈𝗎: 𝖮𝗄𝖺𝗒??

𝖫𝗎𝖼𝖺𝗌: :)) 𝖳𝗁𝖺𝗇𝗄𝗌 𝗒/𝗇

𝖫𝗎𝖼𝖺𝗌: 𝖦𝗈 𝗍𝗈 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝖼𝗅𝗈𝗌𝖾𝗍 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗈𝗉𝖾𝗇 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖽𝗈𝗈𝗋.

………………………………………………………….

Bro man

……

Okay you know what

This is a little too weird

𝖸𝗈𝗎: 𝖨𝗌 𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋𝖾 𝗌𝗈𝗆𝖾𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗐𝖺𝗇𝗍 𝗆𝖾 𝗍𝗈 𝖻𝗋𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗒𝗈𝗎? 𝗈𝗇𝗈”

𝖫𝗎𝖼𝖺𝗌: 𝖸𝖾𝖺𝗁, 𝖼𝗁𝗈𝖼𝗈𝗅𝖺𝗍𝖾? 𝖨𝖿 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗌𝗍𝗂𝗅𝗅 𝗁𝖺𝗏𝖾 𝖺𝗇𝗒 𝗅𝖾𝖿𝗍 𝗅𝗈𝗅

oooOOOOOH

Oooooh man what a relief

If you’ll recall

Cause ik it’s been a hot minute

In the last episode (Light Switch 1) it was Valentine’s Day

He just wants something sweet =7=” Bro you know that jello sh*t they serve in them hospitals must be nasty af

He just wants some good stuff is all

Who doesn’t want chocolate when they’re sick? Or sad?

But author eating chocolate when you’re sick isn’t good for you do you want to die

Hey bro bold of you to assume--

...anyway

𝖸𝗈𝗎: 𝖮𝗁, 𝗈𝖿 𝖼𝗈𝗎𝗋𝗌𝖾! 𝖨 𝗁𝖺𝗏𝖾 𝗅𝗈--

…

Hold on

Wait just another hot minute

…

Sis how he know you keep chocolate in your closet??

He wasn’t here when you shoved everything in there

Heck he ain’t ever been in your house once

…

Enough ellipses you’re just gonna go for it

Screw it

It’s just Lucas

He probs just assumed it was a cliche or normal thing to do

You really needed to stop overthinking things and just

Do It ✔™

So you do it

You walk to your closet and open the door

…

Well you start to anyway

On the way over something catches your eye now that your sight’s adjusted

You make your way to your desk, where a stack of letters and junk flyers are just sitting there taking up space and making the room look trashy

You’re easily distracted at times, and a bit nosy, so you pick up the first flyer on the stack to figure out what it is

Such-and-So’s Pool Service!1!1 We clean--

Yeah okay you don’t care

About that anyway

What you do care about, or what piques your interest rather, is the date

It’s labeled as being delivered almost two weeks ago

…

All of the letters and junk mail are labeled as being delivered two weeks ago

…

You’re about to set them all back down when you see something flapping beneath the gentle circulation of the ceiling fan

A Post-It note?

A Post-It note

It says…

It doesn’t matter what it says

Because you’d recognize that handwriting anywhere, after all the notes he’d written you

It’s from Minnie

𝐼 𝑡𝘩𝑜𝑢𝑔𝘩𝑡 𝑦𝑜𝑢’𝑑 𝑎𝑝𝑝𝑟𝑒𝑐𝑖𝑎𝑡𝑒 𝑡𝘩𝑎𝑡 𝐼 𝑏𝑟𝑜𝑢𝑔𝘩𝑡 𝑡𝘩𝑒 𝑚𝑎𝑖𝑙 𝑖𝑛 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑦𝑜𝑢. 𝑀𝑎𝑦𝑏𝑒 𝑞𝑢𝑖𝑡 𝑏𝑒𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑠𝑢𝑐𝘩 𝑎𝑛 𝑎𝑖𝑟𝘩𝑒𝑎𝑑 𝑛𝑒𝑥𝑡 𝑡𝑖𝑚𝑒? ;) 𝐵𝑢𝑡 𝑠𝑒𝑟𝑖𝑜𝑢𝑠𝑙𝑦, 𝑠𝑡𝑜𝑝 𝑏𝑒𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑠𝑜 𝑙𝑎𝑧𝑦! -- 𝐾𝑆 <𝟥

𝑃.𝑠. - 𝑀𝑎𝑦𝑏𝑒 𝑢𝑠𝑒 𝑎 𝑏𝑒𝑡𝑡𝑒𝑟 𝑒𝑥𝑐𝑢𝑠𝑒 𝑛𝑒𝑥𝑡 𝑡𝑖𝑚𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑤𝑎𝑛𝑛𝑎 𝑐𝘩𝑒𝑎𝑡 𝑜𝑛 𝑚𝑒. 𝑁𝑜𝑡 𝑡𝘩𝑎𝑡 𝑖𝑡’𝑠 𝑔𝑜𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡𝑜 𝑚𝑎𝑡𝑡𝑒𝑟.

Deep breaths deep breaths deep breaths

He was here

He’d been here

He’d come here the night before--

He’d known

You were such a dumdum

Of course you should have known one of your parents would call. Probably your mom-

UGH

WHAT IS THIS LIFE OF YOURS?!

Okay

But

He was arrested so it’s fine

No wait

He got out

He…

...He got out ._.”

And you

Were

Home

Rn??

……………………

Okay time to get those chocolates and move move move

Just make a small right turn and

Ca-chunk.

……………………………………………………

The closet door just...opens

A familiar figure stepping out from the shadows

He’s wearing his favorite striped blue t-shirt and faded blue jeans

And he’s holding a rose between his teeth

He removes it with a muffled sigh, tossing it back into the closet

“I wanted to surprise you but, I should have known it’s just like you to get easily sidetracked.”

He shoves a phone into his pocket

Lucas’ phone.

He smiles.

“Did you miss me?”

He paces over to you, touching your face

Stroking it softly with ghost-like fingers

It’s...cold and somehow oddly comforting at the same time

Sending you down a trail of mixed signals and warning signs all over again

But you can’t move

He’s backing you up against the desk--

Wait yes you can move

You gotta get out of here. Don’t think. Just get out.

Scream! Yell! Do something!

You scream. He places a hand over your mouth, shoving you back down against the desk. His breath is hot against your skin from where he hovers over you just inches, centimeters away…

...Maybe you should have gone for using a brain cell or two instead

“Why are you doing this again? Why do you have to be so difficult all the time?”

You’re struggling but he must have been hitting up the gym again cause this beach is strong

He’s rambling things to you under his breath, but with the pounding in your ears it’s hard to make out everything he’s saying

Oh dear Lord in heaven you have to get out of here

Use your brain cells y/n use your brain cells

PLS

He’s forcing you both to stand upright. He pulls you so hard that the momentum causes the desk to sway, a drawer popping open

A drawer containing your knife. The same knife Seungmin had given you.

He wanted you to sever some bonds?

Okay, you could do that alright

Braincells: Activate!

You go for it

Raising a knee to his xxxx, you shove him back with all your feeble might and snatch that bad boy, whirling around to slash your way out of here if you have to

But somehow Seungmin has become a Superhuman™ and he parries your attack, twisting your arms behind your back and slamming you back down onto the desk

You almost hear him grimace as you cry out in pain, like he’s in just as much turmoil as you

And before you know it a rag is held up over your face, Seungmin gently laying his cheek against yours. Somehow in the span of time all this was going on, he’d managed to throw a mask over his face...

“I’m so sorry, y/n...I never wanted it to come to this...I was hoping to take you quietly…

...But it’s also not my fault you’re so damn difficult all the time.”

Moonlight streaming in through the curtain was blurring together, your thoughts slowly growing more and more incoherent

A scream still caught in your throat, the last thing you recall is again the scent of lavender and Spring daisies. Except it was much stronger now, because that scent was now carrying you somewhere up, up, and away…

~~~

The faint sound of laughter is what awakens you for the 47294907204 time

Seriously how many more times were you gonna clock out like jeez

Not to over exaggerate but man alive

…

……

………

You’re blinking up at the ceiling when it all comes back to you

Seungmin

Your room

Kim Seungmin

Your closet

Minnie

You being carried away somewhere…

It doesn’t take you long to throw yourself up right, but when you do you instantly regret the action, as a splitting headache takes hold of your cranial

It causes you to wince, reaching both hands up to grab your skull...which are, surprisingly...rather heavy…

…

Holy frick and frack you’ve been chained

Your wrists

There are cuffs around them

And you’re literally connected to a bedpost

…………

You swallow

This isn’t good

It’s not good at all

What the heck is going on now…?

You gotta examine your surroundings. You need to stop being in the dark all the time

Time to flip on a light switch brother

Let’s see

You’re sitting in a bed

Your bed

…

Wait

Your bed?

That can’t be right

You distinctly remember, despite the running gag of you not knowing anything, that Minnie had hoisted you off somewhere

He’d deadass climbed out the window or something

You look up and around next

…

It was unmistakable

This was your room: here was your bed, your bookshelf, your desk, TV, closet…

Even your stuffed animals and stationery was here. Exactly as you’ve always had it.

Except, normally your bed was on the right side of the room. Currently, it was on the left

So it was like

A parallel of your bedroom

A weird mirrored version, like you’d stepped through the looking glass…

...You supposed essentially, in some ways, you already had. Starting around high school.

Argh

This was really bad

You had to get out of here

Thankfully the chains were pretty long, so your movement wasn’t too restricted and you could move around for the most part as normal

If you had to guess, you could probably make it about halfway across the room before you ran out of chain

……

A thought you’d never thought you’d be having

Swiftly, you raise the sheets to check your legs

They’re free, save for a few bruises. Yours arms are in worse shape with twice as many and these damned heavy cuff links

This was honestly an outrage

And hella dehumanizing

You weren’t sure what was scarier: the fact that you were sitting in a mirror copy of your bedroom chained like an animal, or the fact that Minnie had done this

…

Seungmin

No more Minnie

He was Seungmin now

Maybe even just Kim

Because you would no longer have any ties to him after this

He was long gone now

It was over

Bam!

“Hahahahahahahaha!”

Oh gosh

IT REALLY IS OVER

HE’S HERE

WHAT WAS—

Wait was that laughter just now?

It sounded...familiar…

As in

Recorded

…

You strained your ears, holding your breath a moment

If you focused really hard

You could just barely hear it

Voices. Sound effects. More audio laughter.

Someone was watching TV

That or Seungmin had sold you to a circus act

Which might have been preferable actually because you really didn’t know if he wanted you dead or not

I mean

On one hand

Why would someone go to so much trouble to make an exact replica of your bedroom?

But on another

There were some major sickos out there…

And you really could never tell what he was thinking

…

No, no, no y/n

No tears

We’re not going to cry

Big girl pants big girl pants

We’re going to get ourselves out of here and hop on the first plane to a new country

Move to Switzerland and start a cute little sheep farm

Change your name to Olga

Marry a huge scary-looking huntsman that was actually very sweet

And spend the rest of your days baking apple pies and schnitzel and shaving wool from sheep to knit fluffy sweaters and sell them on the Swiss version of Amazon

Yeah something like that

Everything was going to be a-o—

“You’re awake.”

ACAHNDUSLILIAHDSLINUFARJDSA

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

It’s Kim Seungmin

He’s standing in the doorway

You didn’t even hear the door open

He takes two steps in before pausing to admire what a mess you probably look like

Only to him, you’ve never looked more beautiful

You don’t know this of course, but in his mind: you’re stunning

I mean, absolutely breathtaking

Sitting here in the room he worked so hard putting together for you

Your hair a wind-blown bed-mangled mess the way you toss and turn in your sleep sometimes

The natural glow that radiates off your face when you’re not wearing any makeup

The shine from the rays of faint sunrise as they hit your tear-stained face

It’s a work of art

What he’s worked for since he first laid eyes on you all those years ago

He’s wanted this so badly for such a long time

And it’s finally happening

He’s finally gotten what he’s pined for all this time: you

All that time he took getting to know you, forming a bond, taking measurements and pictures and writing down numbers, formulating the perfect plan

It may not have gone exactly how he imagined it would, but it’d still produced the same results. You were now, finally, his. All that was left to do was to clean you of any ties you had to your past life, and then the war would be over. The climax had come and gone. It was all downhill from here.

He told himself over and over again, that this is what he’d wanted...but yet

A part of him felt almost guilty for some reason

Of course he was happy, but also

…

It this really what he’d wanted?

He wanted to celebrate

But

Though you looked so beautiful

He also didn’t like seeing you so sad

…

It was fine

You just had to get adjusted, that was all

It’s hard being whisked off from one place to another

In a few days you’d be all settled in and then you could both celebrate being happy and alone together

You’d realize what a wonderful thing he had done for the both of you and thank him

And he’d never have to worry about anyone touching you or so much as looking at you ever again

You’d be his special treasure

Something he’d be able to look forward to coming home to each and every day after he landed his dream job as a photographer

Of course, you’d never get to accomplish the goals you’d told him about for your life, but…

That wouldn’t matter after a little time had passed, once you realized you only needed rely on him from now on

And there would be lots of fun things to do at home, he’d make sure of it

He’d take good care of you, here at his father’s old cabin house

And no one would be any the wiser because his parents were scarcely ever home

They were never around, always traveling from one place to another. He’d learned to take care of himself when he was 13, and from then on had been fiercely and undeniably independent

He really hadn’t seen or heard from his parents since, they’d just left him with the house and sent monthly checks to take care of the bills. If he thought hard enough, the last memory he had of his mother was probably at an unexpected Christmas visit when he was 15

And after that, nada

So as one could guess, his life had been very lonely…

Of course, he’d normally preferred being alone and if he was bored, he had Felix and Changbin to check up on him

But that all changed the moment he laid eyes on you

Oh sure, he’d seen you before that fateful rainy afternoon. When he actually bothered showing up to class. But…

Catching you alone that day was like a sign to him

He’d been wandering the back alleys as he normally did

On his way home, he realized he’d forgotten one of his cameras at school

So he had to make a detour to get it

He really wanted to take some shots of the coming storm for a new collection he’d been working on

On the way over, it wouldn’t leave his mind that something was missing…

He needed a host, a muse, a character

Some sort of other life force to give breath to the photographs

They were fine as they were

But just fine wasn’t fine for him

He could do better

Surely there was something—

...Drat. They’d already locked the doors.

He’d have to hoist himself in through a window now—

...And there you were.

He couldn’t explain it

He’d seen you before, sure, rarely, on occasion. But you’d just been a passing figure in the sea of endless faces

Now you were more than that. You were the figure, the face, the missing piece he’d been searching for

But he knew how fickle the human race was. So he’d have to play coy and civil before going in for the kill

If he turned out not to like you, he could always toss you back out into the sea

But the moment he swooped down to catch you from that (minorly hysterical) fall, he’d felt it. The missing spark he’d been waiting for all along.

He couldn’t take his eyes away. You were simply too real, too alive, too beautiful and unwavering

Yet shy and clean and simple all the same

It was a perfect paradox

An acute conundrum

And he was loving every second of it

He knew, in that moment, that he had to

As cringey as it sounds

That he had to make you his

And now you were...almost

It was just a bit further before he reached the light at the end of the tunnel

He’d never be lonely or lost for inspiration again

Because he’d have you

And that was all he needed...

𝑇𝑜 𝑏𝑒 𝑐𝑜𝑛𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑢𝑒𝑑...𝑎𝑔𝑎𝑖𝑛 ♥

102 notes · View notes

amyscascadingtabs · 5 years

Text

i’ll walk through hell with you

chapter 3: even if we’re breaking down

Amy searches for - and gets - some answers, but decision-making turns out to be a bumpier ride than expected.

read on ao3

read earlier chapters

february

The first days are always worst.

The first days after the start of another period, another negative test, the first days of knowing that no, it didn't work this time either, are always darkest. There's no trace of the enthusiasm she feels every time there's a positive result on her ovulation tests, no hint of the careful confidence each time her period is a day or two late. Instead, Amy feels both like she's constantly on the verge of tears and like she'll never experience an emotion again. Excruciating pain, then complete numbness. Everything, then nothing.

Each month, she wishes for her life to pause for a moment, letting her hide underneath the warm comforter for days without talking to anyone. Each month, it continues without lenience.

She still has to wake up in the mornings, get herself ready, make sure everyone wears clothes and eats breakfast and gets to wherever they’re supposed to be. She has to get through her workday, filled with assignments and must-dos and complaints and petty arguments, and when she’s finally done, there’s a daycare pick-up and food shopping and a full evening remaining.

Her life won’t give her a break, won’t give her a chance to retreat into a corner and scream her lungs out in frustration over why her body's not cooperating, why she's not getting pregnant when it happened near effortlessly the last time. She finds herself getting jealous of her two-year-old, who currently handles most of her frustrations by laying down on the floor and screaming until she's red in the face. Compared to the torture of maintaining the illusion that everything's fine and she's not falling into pieces, Amy feels like a couple conspicuous, falsetto anger screams of her own would be quite the relief.

Adulthood is truly overrated at times.

She keeps going despite her bitterness and anxiety, because if she stops, everything will fall apart, and if everything falls apart, she has to put it back together. She lets her life continue despite the heaviness in her heart, because it has to, so she forces a smile and curses the fact that for some reason, everyone around her seems to be pregnant or have a newborn.

She doesn't know if it's solely because she’s paying more attention, but she swears they're everywhere. A beat cop in her squad, a witness she helps interview, a stranger next in line to her at Starbucks and a teacher at Leah's daycare, the latter prompting the toddler to ask her first curious questions about where babies come from - specifically, how one got inside her teacher. Amy makes an honest, well-intentioned attempt to give a simplified explanation of two people who love each other very much, but it turns out Leah's major concern is whether or not Miss Edwards ate the baby living inside her tummy and whether or not that means someone could eat her, too.

(“Jake, please stop telling your daughter about how you’ve been friends with a cannibal.”)

(“It's not my fault she picks up on everything!”)

It feels like a taunt, like the world is laughing at her while she tries to keep it together. She can’t even get a break when she stops by Target on the way to pick up Leah from daycare. She's only picking up socks, some emergency groceries, and cold medicine, but of course, she all but walks right into a display of Valentine’s Day-themed babywear and has to stop herself from standing there and staring at the tiny, heart-patterned, onesies and pacifiers.

Amy has to remind herself they have boxes of Leah's old baby clothes left in the attic, so she shouldn't have been going too crazy with buying new baby clothes even if she had been pregnant. Even so, she cannot shake the stinging reminder that if there had been a baby on the way, she would have been perfectly able to buy the impossibly soft pajamas with multicolored hearts and a matching hat, and the thought wouldn't have felt deeply, intensely wrong.

She puts the item back, fast as if it had burnt her.

There’s traffic on the way to the daycare, enough to make her about ten minutes late and double her stress levels. Her two-year-old might not know the clock, but she’s become easily worried as of late, and the catastrophe part of Amy's brain pictures a devastated child crying about whether her parents are ever coming to get her. She rushes into the building all out of breath from stress and anxiety, only to find out Leah is happily playing with building blocks and shows zero interest in saying goodbye to her friends to go home. Amy decides to spare herself an argument today and lets her daughter play for ten minutes extra while she sits down on the floor to catch her breath.

Although Leah’s only a toddler yet, Amy keeps being surprised by the tremendous pride she feels watching this child learn about and slowly take on the world. She watches her communicate with the other kids around her even on limited vocabulary, watches her construct simple towers and laugh when she pushes them over and the blocks scatter, sees her wave goodbye to her friend when another parent comes to pick up one of the kids she was playing with.

Of all her achievements in life, Amy can’t quite grasp the fact that she - admittedly with some help - created this person who’s becoming more and more her own individual by the day. It’s all moving so fast, each day bringing new surprises and challenges, and it’s all making her increasingly certain their lives would be even more of a wonderful whirlwind with the addition of another child.

She’s thought about the possibility of not having one, too. During her most exhausting days, when the scheduling and stressing and ovulation testing feels like a third full-time job on top of the two she already has, she’s toyed with the thought of ignoring it, but she always ends up returning to her original wish. There’s certain guilt to it, a nagging thought in the back of her head wondering if she’s ungrateful. She already has the best kid in the world, and maybe she’s egoistic to want another. She’s struggling even to explain it to herself, how it has nothing to do with ungratefulness for the child she has and everything to do with how she always pictured herself having at least two kids, how it feels like another baby would make their already perfect family that much more perfect. If they’re awesome like this, a fourth member would make them sensational, and if one kid is magical, Amy imagines two would be out of this world.

She just wishes the second one could hurry up already. Beginning to exist, for example, would be a great start.

She’s vaguely aware of what’s happening in the room, too tired and stressed and in her head to notice much, but she snaps back to reality once Leah stands up and walks over to her, wrapping her arms around Amy’s chest.

“Sad,” she says, and Amy’s confused because the toddler seemed perfectly fine a minute ago, but then she clarifies. “Mama’s sad.”

Oh.

“Yeah,” she admits, stroking Leah’s hair and hugging her back, feeling her earlier so high heartbeat return to a normal pace once her two-year-old’s in her arms. “I’m a little sad today. That’s okay. Everyone’s sad sometimes.”

“Wait.” Leah squirms out of Amy’s grip, disappearing to the chest of drawers in the corner of the room and finding the one with her picture on it. She pulls out the stuffed animal in the shape of a lion they keep at the daycare for nap-time and comfort, runs over to Amy again, and places the toy in her lap. “Better now.”

Amy wants to cry again, but this time, it’s tears of love, and pride, and gratefulness for this shockingly emotionally intelligent child who she can’t help but wrap in another hug, holding her tightly and kissing her cheeks until she starts giggling.

“I’m much better now,” she agrees, and Leah shines up.

“I’m nice!” She points to herself, looking mighty proud, and Amy laughs at the beautiful confidence.

“You are so nice, baby. Do you think we can go home now? I know your dad promised he’d make spaghetti tonight. Can you say spaghetti?”

“Spaghetti!” Leah exclaims, and then she’s out in the hallway and already busy trying to put her shoes on the wrong feet by the time Amy’s stood up.

Each month her life keeps refusing to pause. No matter how tiring and exhausting it gets at times, she suspects it might be for the best.

For all the things not working out for them within the whole having-a-baby project, the process of finding time to try and make said baby on the right days every month works smoother than Amy expected it to. Sure, it's not the most romantic feeling to have a sense of obligation hovering over them for the specific days, and it brings an odd pressure to it she's not sure she enjoys, but it works. They make time, somehow, and they get all the way until month five of trying before they have to take to desperate measures.

“To be clear,” Amy mutters before Jake's even closed the supply closet door behind him. “I really don’t like that we're doing this here.”

“Yeah, you repeated that about twenty or so times when I suggested it.” He smirks, locking the door carefully. “It's okay. Also, the cameras don't reach into that corner.”

“Still. The whole thing. I was voted -”

“Most appropriate, I know.” The cheeky smile he gives her makes her feel a bit less awful about their decision. “God, I can't believe you agreed to this.”

“You should make sure I don't change my mind, then.”

“Oh, I will.”

He sounds confident, and it makes her snort with laughter because doing this at the precinct feels absurd and wildly inappropriate, but in a way, there's something about them sneaking around - the time-efficacy and detailed planning of it - making her find it kind of hot, too. Hotter than she'd be willing to admit. This baby-planning thing must truly be making her crazy, Amy thinks, but there’s no time to lose and this is not the time for analyzing.

She closes the distance between them, cupping his face with her hands as she would for any gentle kiss, only this time, she puts enough force in her movement to press him up against the wall as their lips, then tongues, meet.

It’s clear from the way he gasps, and from the way his hands wave before finding their place on her upper back, that he wasn’t expecting her to take charge like this. It spurs her on, because a flustered Jake is high up on the list of her favorite Jakes, and god, does she love seeing and feeling him react to her in that way. It’s an unambiguous and cherished reminder of how even after eight years, she’s able to surprise him as much as he can surprise her, and if anything, she’s learned exactly how it’s done.

They're both panting when she lets go, getting worked up in the competitive heat. Amy uses the quick break to get to work on his top plaid buttons and Jake's not slow to follow with her uniform, but she's not letting him take the lead in this game yet. The unbuttoned plaid allows her to pull the collar of his grey t-shirt aside. At first, the kisses she presses to the top of his collarbone and the crook of his neck are light and teasing, but then they turn into sharper biting and he straight-up moans.

If she couldn't feel his enthusiasm before, she definitely can now. It doesn't leave her unaffected; she subtly presses herself even closer to him, and while she's sucking hard enough on his shoulder to leave a mark, his hands are roaming along her back, under her shirt, playing with her belt for a second before she moves his hand away.

“Don't be impatient,” she warns with another sly bite to his neck. “If we're going to do this here, I'm in charge.”

“You're really out to kill me, huh?”

“Yeah, but you love me.” Amy punctuates the sentence with a kiss, feeling him smile against her lips.

“I do,” he breathes as her hands wander down, taking time to trace patterns with her nails along his lower back. “I really, really do.”

“I stand by this being a stupid idea,” she mumbles when they’re catching their breath, trying to return to their previous states of dress with the help of a phone flashlight in the half-darkness, because of course the lighting in this place is busted. Amy considers it a miracle she could keep herself from having a panic attack thanks to claustrophobia, but she supposes determination and enough distraction are powerful tools.

Jake snickers, fumbling with the buttons of his plaid while she holds the phone’s flashlight for him. “You’re acting like you didn’t enjoy it.”

“I did,” she says, rolling her eyes at him. “Doesn’t make it any less inappropriate.”

“It was fun, though.”

“It was.” She kisses the tip of his nose, adjusting his collar to hide the beginning of a red and purple shadow at the nape of his neck. “I suppose even desperate measures can be fun sometimes.”

“Even desperate measures can be fun sometimes, title of your sextape.”

“Oh my god, shut up.”

march

“So what’s the verdict for this month?” Jake joins her in the bathroom as she puts the test down to develop. He’s holding two cups of tea and gives her one of them before sitting down next to her, leaning against the bathtub. “Did our crazy workplace rule-breaking pay off?”

“Three minutes, grasshopper.”

“Yeah, yeah,” he grins. “But what do you think? Any hunches? Gut feelings? Visions in a dream?”

Amy snorts, taking a sip of the green chai tea. “Certainly no dream visions. I don't know. Maybe, but I don't want to get my hopes up too much. What's your guess?”

“I'm feeling good about this one,” Jake declares, nodding towards the white and blue plastic stick placed on the floor tiles a foot in front of them. “Let's hope I'm right.”

“Yeah. Let's hope.”

She leans her head on his shoulder as they wait, and his right arm wraps around her back, stroking her hair while they stare at the tiny display window. There's always a curious atmosphere to these moments, before there's been any disappointment and there's still hope of a positive result, and she revels in knowing that until the timer goes off, there's a chance. Until the test has finished developing, there's a possibility of their fourth family member existing inside her - the size of a poppy seed, but existing.

Perhaps month five of trying could be their month. If not, Amy thinks she might just go crazy.

The timer rings, pulling her out of her hopeful dreaming, and she turns it off with a quick tap before reaching for the test.

She was prepared for it. Yet, it feels like a betrayal to see the single line appearing without a trace of another.

“Nope,” she sighs. “Nothing this month either.”

“It's just an early test,” Jake suggests, a trace of hopefulness remaining in his eyes. “You said they're not always accurate that early, and you’ve not gotten your period yet, which means there's hope, right?”

Amy shakes her head. “These tests have been accurate all the other months. This body,” she points to herself, “isn’t pregnant, and apparently, it doesn’t want to be.”

“Come on, Ames. Five months isn't that long.”

“It isn’t?”

“... No? We’ll try again. It’s not a big deal, babe. It's nothing.”

It’s the same phrase again; the one she’s heard a million times at this point - from Jake, herself, Julian, a friendly stranger on a web forum during a particularly anxious night a few weeks ago. If she hears it another time in the same lighthearted, happy-go-lucky tone the pessimist part of her brain makes Jake’s voice sound like, she’s going to be seriously tempted to punch that person.

She doesn’t, this time, but she does question it.

“When does it become something?”

Jake furrows his brows. “What do you mean?”

"Because everyone always says the same thing. One month is nothing. Three months is nothing.” Amy twirls the negative test between her fingers. “Four months was nothing, either. So when does it become something?"

“I don't think I get it -”

“When,” she inhales, “does it go from nothing to something? Where do you draw the line?”

“Oh.” He grimaces, taking the test from her and inspecting it for a second before placing it on top of the trashcan. “I actually don't know, babe.”

“I think I'm going to try scheduling a thorough checkup,” she says, deciding it as she speaks it out loud. “Just so we can exclude anything being seriously wrong.”

“Sure, okay.” Jake nods, pressing a kiss to her forehead and holding her impossibly closer. She doesn't protest, because her dismay and dejection are never quite as severe in the safety of his embrace, and although she feels like a failure who keeps being betrayed by her own body, as long as he’s holding her, it’s easier to breathe. “If you think it's going to make you feel better.”

“Yeah,” she whispers, and at that moment, she can't imagine any knowledge being worse than the no man’s land of confusion and desperation she’s begun to feel stuck in. “I think it's going to make me feel better.”

There’s no reason for them to stay there, cross-legged on the bathroom floor with Jake holding her close and stroking her back without speaking, but neither makes any attempts to move. Moving means having to move on, and though Amy knows they have to and they will, it seems impossible to do so straight away. If Jake is aching to do so, she’s not sure, but at least he doesn’t rush her - he sits there and lets her process until she forces herself to draw back and take a deep breath before standing up.

“It’s going to be okay,” he reminds her when she finally does, and she manages a weak smile upon noting the devotion and steadfastness in his gaze as he says it.

She places her hand over his heart, as has become their little well-ingrained habit and silent love language over the years, and he holds it, rubbing his thumb over hers. “I know.”

At least the two of them are staying intact, she thinks, and allows herself a moment’s gratefulness.

Amy's lived through her fair share of situations where she's been thankful for the fact that her job forces her to practice authoritativeness on a daily basis. She never imagined the process of trying to get an appointment with a fertility doctor to be one of them, but it very much is.

It takes nine different calls, one forgetful medical secretary, ten requests for her to hold for a quick moment that in two cases ends up being several minutes, two times taking calls inside the evidence locker to avoid being spotted, and one incident of screaming into a pillow in frustration, but eventually, she scribbles down an appointment set for next week at a nearby fertility clinic in her calendar and does a short victory dance out of pure relief. Then Leah spots her doing so and starts laughing, and what was supposed to be a brief victory gesture quickly becomes a smaller dance party and makes an already good afternoon even better.

Amy goes to bed with a new sense of hope that night. She’s going to go to the appointment, get some shot or supplement to solve whatever little dysfunction is happening with her body, and everything’s going to be fine. For once, she’s certain about it.

She’s certain about it all the way up until she steps foot inside the actual clinic.

As positive a picture as she painted this place in her head while doing research, being there is stranger than she’d expected, making her feel oddly misplaced and uncomfortable. Maybe it’s the fact that Jake’s not with her, that their packed schedules forced them to choose between both going to the same appointment and being able to get a time somewhere in the nearest month, that’s making her feel off. He’s sent her a cheerful Good Luck-text with double exclamation points and a trio of heart emojis, and she musters a smile as she replies to it and he sends a bitmoji back, but he’s not there and it’s making her feel a lot more vulnerable than she would in his presence.

I wish you were here, she writes, and it’s a mere second before he’s written back, me too.

The waiting room walls are decorated with at least twenty framed photographs of newborn babies. Like a wall of fame, Amy thinks, snapping a picture to send to Jake, but a wall of babies. She wonders if they’re supposed to serve as encouragement, some kind of goal picture, and wonders how smart of a design choice such is for a clinic that could be meeting infertile couples daily. Then she scratches the thought, because it shouldn't matter to her - she's not one of them.

She's going to be fine. It's nothing but a safety check.

She still wishes Jake could have been there.

“You’ve been pregnant before, correct?” The fertility doctor Amy’s meeting manages to make her feel more at ease. The woman - Dr. Thompson, she introduces herself - can't be many years older than Amy, has light hair and a comforting aura about her smile, and from the furious pace with which she's scribbling on her notepad while asking questions, Amy assumes she's thorough. A good sign, she figures.

“Yeah, I have a two-year-old.”

“How long did it take for you to conceive the first time?”

“A month? Really fast.”

Dr. Thompson taps her pen against the notepad. “So this is the first time you're having trouble with it.”

“Yes.” Amy nods, pressing her nails into her wrist one by one to keep focus. “It seems weird to me, because my mother had eight kids and was 42 when she had her last, so I figured…”

“Genetics isn’t always a guarantee.” The doctor offers Amy an excusing smile. She supposes it should be a calming act, but it has the opposing effect. “And how long have you been trying now?”

“Five-six months.”

“Tracking your ovulation?”

“Yes.” Obsessively, Amy wants to add.

Dr. Thompson nods, making another note on her pad. “We do recommend couples over 35 to come in if nothing's happening after six months of actively trying, so it's good you're here. I'll ask you a few additional questions, and then we can start with the physical exam. Does that seem okay?”

“Sure,” Amy hears herself lie.

It doesn't feel okay, not in any way whatsoever. She shouldn’t be sitting here, answering weirder questions about her medical and reproductive history than ever before in her life. She shouldn’t be alone, because Jake should be there to help, answering questions for her when her voice fails and making her feel at ease by holding her hand. There shouldn't be a sense of dread lingering with her, refusing to let go.

She’s not supposed to be here.

This should just work.

There's a physical exam, which is uncomfortable, and bloodwork, which is fine. There’s a quick ultrasound, and she tries to shake the thought of how the last time she had one, she saw her then-unborn daughter wiggle around on the screen. There are information-heavy brochures on everything from a list of procedures to financing and insurance coverage, a quick run-through of the tests Jake needs to have at his appointment the next day, and then, it’s finally over and Amy leaves feeling yet more confused than before.

It can take some time for the bloodwork results to come in, she’s informed. At first, she tries to avoid thinking about it, utilizing every accessible distraction to stay sane. She starts preparing an extra slideshow about community engagement for the precinct, takes Leah to a bonus Mommy-and-Me art class which ends in a lot of laughter and a long bath for both of them, and starts binging a new TV show together with Jake in the evenings. She even tries experimenting in the kitchen to make time pass, but after accidentally setting off the fire alarm at 7 a.m. on a Saturday and waking up all her family plus two bitter next-door neighbors, she gives up.

Three days pass. A voice in the back of her head begins to whisper that if everything looked good, surely they should have gotten back to you by now, and she lays awake staring at the ceiling for most of the night.

Five days pass. She googles the costs of fertility treatments on her phone during her lunch break, doing the math first in her head and then with a calculator on a pastel pink post-it note. Jake asks her what she’s writing when he stops by her desk in the afternoon, and she quickly stows away the note in a drawer and tells him it’s nothing.

Eight days pass. They clean out Leah’s dresser from clothes she’s growing out of, and Amy places at least fifteen items she’s previously wanted to use for another child in the donation pile before Jake stops her.

Ten days pass. At this point, Amy’s certain something is wrong with her, anxious to get the bad news over with. She checks her phone a million times and hovers with her thumb over the clinic’s number for the entire day, but there’s nothing.

On day eleven, she gets a call.

She's in the car, having parked in the precinct’s garage with five minutes to spare when the melodic signal sounds from her pocket and every muscle in her body tenses, every other thought dissipating in an instant when she brings the phone to her ear.

“Amy Santiago.”

“Amy, hi. I hope I’m not interrupting anything - do you have time to talk?” Dr. Thompson sounds upbeat and chattery on the phone, and Amy finds it provoking. She's already prepared for the worst, and cheeriness has no meaning when all she wants to do is to rip off the band-aid.

“It's fine,” she says, glancing at the panel board’s digital clock. “Thanks. Did the results come back?”

“Yes, yes,” Dr. Thompson rambles, and Amy's stomach twists. “I have your blood work results. Everything else looked good, but your AMH level is a bit lower than I’d like to see it in your age group.”

“My AMH level.” She knows she’s stumbled across the word while googling, but the definition slips her mind.

“It’s a hormone that gives a reflection of your ovarian reserve, so roughly how many eggs you have left,” Dr. Thompson explains, talking slower. “The results look like yours is diminished.”

There’s the familiar, panicked feeling she’s felt so many times in her life - like someone is tying a rope around her lungs and pulling it. Amy has to keep forcing air in and out of her mouth, telling herself she can’t panic, not yet.

“How low are they?” She asks, and Dr. Thompson tells her two decimal numbers before explaining further.

“It’s not catastrophic, by any means. You could still get pregnant. You should be aware, though, that a lower ovarian reserve is usually connected to fewer high-quality eggs, so it might be difficult for you on your own.”

The corners of her field of vision are getting blurry, and she closes her eyes to try and focus. Her voice sounds enfeebled in comparison to the doctor’s clear articulation, but she has more questions.

“Is it anything I’ve done? Is there anything I can do?”

“I would believe it’s random. Your ovarian reserve does get lower with age, but for some, it happens a bit earlier than it should. As for what you can do…” There’s a sigh on the other end of the phone, and Dr. Thompson’s tone changes to a graver one that sends a chill down Amy’s spine. “Time is of the essence here. Unfortunately, once this decline sets in, it’ll continue. If you want to get pregnant, I would recommend you start treatment immediately to have the best chances.”

“Do you mean IVF?”

“I believe it could be your best option, yes. Is it something you’ve had time to discuss with your husband?”

“Uhm - no.” She twists the silver wedding band on her left fourth finger, one way and then the other. “ Could we - could you give us some time to decide?”

“Of course.” The cheerful tone returns. “Actually, I would like to see you again in two days to go over this more closely in person and do another ultrasound. Perhaps you could let me know then what you’ve decided and we could discuss how to move forward?”

“Yeah, sure.”

“Perfect, then. Take care,” Dr. Thompson chirps, and Amy knows she should return the polite wish, but it’s all she can do to press the red circle and put her phone in her lap before the panic attack hits her full force.

She ends up working from home that day.

Working is a half-truth at best; she does the bare minimum, then spends the rest of the day laying on the bed with the lights turned off and googling feverishly, trying to find out all the information until the medical terms and her anxiety medication makes her dizzy. Jake texts her once an hour to ask if she's okay, if she's sure he shouldn't leave and go take care of her if she's feeling sick, but she waves him off decisively, telling him she's just tired.

Tonight, she'll have to face reality and tell him, but for a few hours, she can lay unmoving in the darkness of their bedroom and pretend none of this is happening.

She doesn't want it to be. She wants her body to do its thing, get pregnant quickly and naturally and bless her with another beautiful child like it's done masterfully once before. She doesn't want it to be shutting down, doesn't want needles, medications or expensive treatments in order to have a baby. She doesn't want this.

Still, the more she researches, the more it stands clear it's her best option.

She gets her notebook to go over the costs and insurance options another time.

Jake must truly have been worried about her, because he offers to both cook dinner and clean up the kitchen by himself. Amy puts Leah to bed, feeling less heartbroken when the toddler chuckles heartily at the nighttime stories they’re reading and falls asleep clutching the beloved stuffed lion. She stays for a few minutes after Leah drifts off, sitting on the carpet wondering if anything on Earth looks more peaceful than a sleeping child, and leaves first when she feels tears threatening to form at the thought of whether she’ll ever get to hold her own sleeping newborn again.

She has to talk to Jake.

She finds him standing at the kitchen sink, cursing violently over how impossible it is to remove burnt rice from a pot. She kisses his cheek and tells him to let it soak in soapy water for a while, and he grumbles something about wanting everything done so they can focus on relaxing for the rest of the night, getting a chance to watch Jeopardy! and snuggle without anything to stress them out. She has to close her eyes and clench her fists before saying the words she’s been avoiding the entire day - the words to make it all real.

“I got a call back from the fertility doctor today.”

“Uh-huh.” His tone is unsuspecting, but he raises his eyebrows when he sees her tight-lipped expression. “What did they say?”

“I think we need to talk.”

“Oh.”

She sits down as she goes through what was said in the call, staring at the dark wood of their dining table when she can’t make herself look right at him. She goes through each point, patiently replying when he asks for clarification and telling him about the research she’s done, what conclusions she’s drawn about their best options. He nods slowly as she speaks, and though Amy considers herself a master at interpreting Jake Peralta’s facial expressions after nearly eight years in a relationship with him, he’s unreadable to her at this moment.

“So…” She’s braiding her fingers again, trying to keep her hands occupied with something other than picking at the skin of her fingers until they bleed. It’s already happened once today. “Long story short, they want to know if we’re doing IVF or not. And they want to know in two days.”

“Okay.” Jake sighs. “Well… we’re not, are we?”

She looks up at him. “What do you mean? Of course we are.”

He blinks. “We are?”

“Yeah?” She scrunches her forehead, and he gives her a look she recognizes from hundreds of interrogations when a witness has said something unexpected and he’s calculating whether or not he thinks they’re telling the truth. “We have to do IVF. It’s my best chance to pregnant. Our best chance to have a baby.”

“Do we have to, really? They said you could get pregnant naturally. You mentioned those supplements?”

“IVF is likelier by far. It’s the best option.”

He opens his mouth as if he’s on his way to say something, then closes it, turning around and starting to scrub at the rice-stained pot again.

“Look, I don’t love it either.” Her voice is sterner now. “I’m not exactly hyped about shooting hormones into my stomach with needles, but it’s our best shot. What’s the issue?”

“The needles you mentioned? The money we don’t have unlimited resources of? The time we have even less of?”

“We’d solve those things! I’m a lieutenant, insurance could pay for a couple of cycles - I already looked everything up. ”

“Of course you did,” he says, but it’s not with his usual fondness - he’s shorter, almost colder when he speaks. “Fine. But it might not even work, you know?”

“It’s at least more likely to!” She notices herself raising her voice, and tries to adjust it, thinking of their daughter sleeping a closed door away. Leah can’t wake up to this - Amy might never forgive herself if it happened, and she knows for certain Jake wouldn’t.

“More likely isn’t a guarantee.”

“What’s the point you’re trying to make here, Peralta?”

“I don’t know,” he shrugs, letting go of the dish-brush and pot and giving her a tired look. “IVF is such a process. It’s a huge deal.”

“So exactly like having a kid, then.”

“It’s more than that.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Jake puts his elbows on the counter, running his hands through his hair with a sigh.

“Just… if we’re going to go through a whole medical process to put another human on this world when we’ve already done it once, I feel like you have to be so confident you want to? You can’t have a single doubt. I watched Charles and Genevieve try to do it before they adopted Nikolaj, you remember?” She nods. “It always seemed so freaking tough to me. Like, if you’re going to do that, you have to be willing to give it your everything.”

“And you’re not?”

“I… I don’t know, Ames. I’m sorry.”

He’s throwing unexpected, verbal bricks at her. She’s never known how to react when his opinions oppose what she believed they would be, she gets defensive by instinct, and he won’t ever let her forget the time she turned to an honest modified Lincoln-Douglas debate. They both know they can’t do that now - with time and experience, casual and loving conversations have grown a much-preferred method for dealing with opposing opinions - although Amy can’t deny her current temptation to rig up two debate stands in their living room.

It feels like an ironic repeat of the fight they had back then, yet it’s new. It’s common and uncommon ground all at once, history and present day.

She’s started picking at the skin of her right thumb again, scraping at it with her index finger. Jake’s watching her with worried eyes, but he doesn’t stop her.

“Are you saying you don’t want to have a second child?” It’s a poisonous question, she knows, but asks it anyway.

“I don’t mean it like that,” he mumbles, and his feigned nonchalance provokes her.

“Then what the fuck,” she says, putting emphasis on the expletive, “do you mean?”

“I mean that if you came with a positive pregnancy test right here, tonight, then I’d be one hundred percent in. I’d be ready. I’d be over the freaking moon, and so excited to love another baby the way I already know I can love one.”

“So what you’re saying is if I could simply get pregnant, you’d be up for it,” she sneers, scorching frustration flooding her as she interprets his poorly articulated sentiment. “Cool. Well, newsflash, it’s what I wish, too! But clearly, I can’t.”

“That’s not what I’m saying -” Jake groans. His cheeks are flushed scarlet as he fights to find his words, but she can’t bring herself to feel an ounce of sympathy for him. “I just don’t know how to feel about us having to pay a bunch of money, do an advanced medical treatment and be stressed out thanks to it, if there’s still a risk it won’t work. It feels wrong to me, Ames. I would love another baby so much, but I don’t know how to justify prioritizing it over Leah, or us, or focusing on the family we already are.”

There’s a rational part of her head somewhere telling her to calm down, not to put words in his mouth like a self-fulfilling prophecy, but that rational part is getting increasingly quiet for each sentence they exchange. She finds herself glaring at him instead, the man she loves most who can’t seem to understand her sometimes, can’t seem to understand how much this is breaking her or how she can’t give up this dream without ensuring they’ve tried it all.

Something breaks when he mentions Leah. The implication, the mere suggestion this would be more important than the child she’d go through hell and back to keep safe and happy, is like a seething spear piercing through her, ripping a tear in a shield she thought was impenetrable. It sets off something instinctive, more than defensive, something that’s been part of her since the first time she felt her daughter move inside her.

“Are you trying to say I love my daughter less because I want another baby?” She spits out the words.

“No! Oh my god, no, I swear I’m not.” Jake looks shaken, blinking a few times like he’s not sure what’s happening. “All I want is for you to be okay, and this is clearly stressing you out like crazy, I don’t want it to get worse.”

“Yeah, I wonder why that is. It’s not like my reproductive system is trying to shut down several years in advance, or something. Who’d ever be stressed about that?”

“Ames.”

“I don’t want to hear it. I really, really, don’t want to hear it.”

She knows it’s a bad idea. The right choice would probably be to stay right here and have a calm and collected conversation to work out their respective issues with the decision they’re facing, but instead, the instinct that she needs to get away overpowers her rational thinking. She stands up without pushing in the chair, quickly grabbing her phone and keys, and before Jake has time to ask what she’s doing, she declares it.

“I’m leaving.”

“What?”

“I need to be alone for a moment. Don’t follow me. Please.”

“Wait, what the hell?” He scrunches his forehead. “Obviously I can’t. Will you be back?”

She sighs. “Yeah. Tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow? Amy… don’t do anything stupid!”

It may be an insignificant detail in the sea of irrational actions she’s taking, but at least, Amy feels a sense of pride that she doesn’t slam the door on her way out.

Even in their Brooklyn neighborhood, she expected fewer people to be out at this time - it’s late, or so she thinks. A quick glance at her wristwatch tells her it’s not even nine p.m. yet. It felt like she spent years inside their apartment, dealing and worrying and last but not least fighting with the one person she most hates fighting with, but for the outside world, it's a normal Wednesday evening. She's jealous of them.

She walks slowly - too slowly to be in Brooklyn - and stops when she reaches the small park near their house. There are no kids left here at this time, only a group of teenagers hanging out over on the swings and smoking. Amy sits down on a bench a safe distance away from them, thinking that right now, it's a shame she stopped smoking. She could have needed a cigarette, but even the nicotine patches are but a memory after she quit cold turkey during her first pregnancy.

She puts her head in her hands instead, inhaling and exhaling in and out in an imagined square until her breathing stabilizes.

She shouldn't have left, she knows. It's an unfair and immature decision beneath her usual professional ways, cold-hearted and mean towards Jake and even towards Leah, but she couldn't imagine staying and pretending what he was saying didn't affect her. Somewhere deep inside, she understands his skepticism, but she's not sure he understands her desperation or the helpless feeling of knowing her body is working against her. That helplessness overpowers all her hesitation. She's never been one to give up on dreams easily, and definitely not before giving her everything and exhausting every last option. Jake knows that about her. He should understand.

She picks up her phone, surprised when the only text she sees is a single I'm sorry. She ignores it, going into her contacts instead and calling another one of her most used numbers.

Rosa picks up on the second signal.

“Amy?”

“Hey, Rosa.” She tries to keep a normal tone, but her voice ends up wavering anyway.

“What’s happening?”

“Can I come over? Watch a Nancy Meyers-movie and drink tequila?” It’s their years-old routine, established during the god-awful six months they both had their partners in witness protection and each other as trusted confidantes. It’s been a long time since they last arranged one, but if she’s ever needed one since, it’s tonight.

There’s the sound of someone moving at the other end of the phone, a mumbled apology before the background noise disappears. “Why?”

“Jake and I had a fight,” she mumbles, wondering why things feel so much more real once you say them out loud.

“Okay.”

“I left.”

“Uh-huh. Wait,” Rosa stops her, suddenly halting. “You left? Like, straight-up walked out? What the hell? Did he do something?”

“No, no - oh my god, Rosa, it’s Jake.”

“Then why’d you leave?”

“We disagreed on a thing.” Rosa hums, urging her to continue. “I don’t think he sees my perspective. Or understands it.”

“Santiago,” Rosa sighs, and Amy can tell there’s serious advice coming. “Look, I’m not going to tell you how to solve your fights, but - this is you and Jake. Sure, you don't always agree on everything, but that man loves you so much it’s nauseating, okay?”

“I guess. I mean, I know.”

“Like, you two have a freaking toddler, which should be the death of all romance, and somehow you’re still sickening.” Rosa says the last words with a bit of a groan. “If I were you, I’d go home and try to explain my point. Calmly.”

Amy snorts. “Since when have you encouraged people to solve a fight calmly? I thought insults or threats were your style.”

“I said if I were you, not me. Amy, just hear him out. Have a proper conversation with him, and explain your side of… whatever you guys are fighting about. If you’re still mad after, you can come over.”

“Okay,” she whispers, secretly relieved someone else made the decision for her. “Thanks, Rosa.”

“Anytime,” her friend replies, and then grunts. “No, nevermind, not anytime. I’m not your relationship coach. But sure, you’re welcome, I guess.” She makes another noise of discomfort. “Text me an update.”

“I will. Thank you.”

Rosa hangs up on her, and Amy balances her phone in her hand. There are no more texts. Jake’s giving her time, she guesses, letting her cool off like he’s learned to do the few times in their relationship when squabbles and bickering have turned to actual disputes.

She’s barely been outside for twenty minutes, but the bad conscience is kicking in hard, especially after Rosa’s advice. She needs to explain her side in a calm and collected manner, and they need to decide how to move forward, together. As much as she wants to take full control of the situation and put her body through whatever it takes, as desperate as she is to know they're doing something, it's a decision she can't make alone - because she isn’t alone.

She may be frustrated and disappointed and a little bit scared, but she's not alone.

She texts him she’ll be back in 10 before she starts walking. When he doesn't reply, she walks faster.

The first thing she notes upon returning is the episode of Doctor McStuffins playing on their television. She could recognize those melodies and the exaggerated upbeat enthusiasm of all characters’ voices anywhere, and for a fleeting moment, she wonders why Jake would be watching the hysterical children's show on his own before she realises he's half-laying on the couch with a seemingly asleep Leah in his arms. Their daughter is wrapped in her duvet like a burrito, her face slightly red like she’s been crying, and Amy’s bad conscience gets impossibly worse.

“You came back,” Jake notes, and she can read the relief on his face.

“Yeah. I texted you.”

“My phone is in the kitchen,” he explains, pointing to Leah. “This one woke up five minutes after you left. Screaming and crying like crazy and could barely talk. Nightmare, I think? Anyway, it was heartbreaking.”

“Oh, baby.” Amy sits down next to them, stroking Leah's back through the duvet. “I'm sorry I wasn't there.”

“It’s fine, she didn't notice.”

“I meant I'm sorry I left.”

He looks away. “It's okay.”

“It isn’t,” she assures him, and he gives her a small shrug. “I should have stayed and explained it better.”

“Well, yeah.” He looks back at her with a careful smile. “But I’m sorry, too. I know it’s not the same for me.”

“It’s not your body it’s happening to.”

“No. No, it’s not.”

Leah whimpers in her sleep, and Amy scoots closer on instinct, kissing the top of her daughter’s head. The child makes a new, softer, noise at that, leaning towards her.

“Do you want to hold her?” Jake whispers, and she nods. “I haven’t moved my legs in forever - thanks.”

Their daughter blinks a few times as he lifts her to Amy’s lap instead, opening her eyes for a second, but then she closes them again and rests her head on Amy’s chest.

Amy finds herself guilty of doing the same thing she used to find other parents weird for raving about, burying her nose in Leah’s newly washed hair and sniffing the top of her head, but it stands true - nothing smells better than your own baby, not even when they’re old enough to be walking and talking. These kinds of snuggles aren’t a daily occurrence anymore, and she fears the day they’ll be non-existent. She knows how precious the time with a newborn is, and although she’s itching with excitement for every experience to come, she can’t make herself accept the thought of those days being gone forever. Not yet.

Jake’s hand is playing with Leah’s hair, twirling the subtle curls around his fingers and softly massaging her neck. They’re both so focused on their daughter, Amy’s taken aback when he asks her a question.

“Are you totally, totally sure you want to do IVF?”

“Yeah,” she admits, not a moment’s hesitation. “I know it’s tough, but… I want this so bad. I need to feel like I have some form of control over the situation - I don’t think I could live with myself if I didn’t try everything.”

Jake nods slowly, moving one hand to intertwine with hers, and she thinks she can feel the tension between them fade with his touch. “Okay.”

“Okay?”

“Okay. If you’re willing to go through that, if you think it’s worth it for you, we’ll do it.”

Part of the weight is lifted off of her shoulders like a block of granite, but a few doubts linger.

“I thought you weren’t sure if you wanted another kid,” she remarks, thinking of his comments of I don’t know how to justify prioritizing that, but he shakes his head.

“I’d have all the kids if they’re yours.” He presses a kiss to the nape of Leah’s neck. “It’s not about that. I would love another kid so, so much.”

“So what is it about?”

Jake grimaces. “I’m scared of the process, Ames. I heard way too much about it when Charles and Genevieve were trying, and it took up their whole life and relationship for so long. I love our life as it is. I’m… scared it’d break us, I guess.”

“I know. But I think if I always wanted another kid, if I knew we could have done more and we didn’t try - that would break us, too. It would break me, at least.”

He nods again, squeezing her hand tight and lifting it, pressing a kiss to her knuckles. “We’ll make sure it doesn't happen, then.”

She smiles wide, and without a word, Jake snuggles into her side when she moves to make space, head resting on her shoulder and legs crossed over hers. The three of them are a warm, intimate family cocoon, and Amy thinks that if there’s anything better than watching Jake trace faint circles with his fingers on Leah's upper back, making the child smile in her sleep, it's that he manages to press soft kisses to her own neck at the same time. She has half a mind to compliment him on the multi-tasking, but she's too relaxed to speak.

The kisses stop when he asks her another question, and her eyes reluctantly flutter open.

“Are you sure we can afford it, though?”

“Yeah. I mean, it’s not optimal.” She thinks of her beating heart when she wrote down the numbers, trying to work out how much their insurance could cover.”But we can afford a couple attempts before reevaluating.”

“We’ll get it in the first.”

“Maybe,” she mumbles, hesitant. “You forget this stupid body wants to shut down now. Or, well, its reproductive system.”

He looks up at her with a pained expression, shaking his head. “Please stop talking about it like that.”

“Sorry.”

“Don’t apologize to me,” he says, and part of her knows he’s right, she shouldn’t be talking about it that way, but another part feels too betrayed by her body to care, so she shrugs. “I’m sorry I made it sound like you would prioritize this over Leah, by the way. Not fair.”

“No, it wasn’t. You know it’s not about that.”

“I do. I’m sorry.”

Amy nods, squeezing his hand. She can feel her eyelids getting heavier, the day’s exhaustion returning at full force, and she lets out a wide yawn. It's been a long day, to say the least, and all she wants is to close her eyes and go to sleep in this safe haven with her daughter snuggling on her chest and her husband resting his head on her shoulder. The two of them together are a million times better than any heated or weighted blanket, and having them both there is making her anxiety finally, finally ease up for a while.

“I’m coming with you to the next appointment, so you know. And all the other ones.” Jake’s voice is a warm whisper close to her ear when he speaks again, and she hums her understanding.

“You don't have to come to everything.”

“I'll be trying to,” he assures her. “I’m sorry for being so questioning about it. I just hate seeing you suffer, and this whole thing has already been getting you so down. I guess I'm scared IVF would make that worse if it didn't work out.”

“It might,” she admits. “But I don’t want to keep going like this, either. It’s too frustrating. I need to feel like I’m actively doing something, especially now.”

“I know. Like I said, I’m sorry I was so skeptical.”

“I’m sorry I walked out.”

“I love you.”

She cranes her head to kiss his forehead. “I love you, too.”

Leah whimpers again and stirs in Amy’s arms, regaining her parents’ full attention only to return to her previous relaxed state a short moment later.

“Should we keep her in our bed tonight? In case she has another nightmare.” Amy’s suggestion is mostly out of concern for her daughter, but a little bit out of her own unwillingness for the treasured cuddles to come to an end.

“One condition,” Jake grins. “When we have another baby, we’re getting a huge bed.”

For the first time that day, she laughs. “Deal.”

#my writing #b99 #brooklyn 99 #brooklyn nine-nine #peraltiago #jake x amy #b99 fic #brooklyn 99 fic #brooklyn nine-nine fic #b99 fanfiction #brooklyn nine-nine fanfiction #jake x amy fic #jake x amy fanfiction #peraltiago fic #peraltiago fanfiction #iwthwy #i just formatted 9k jesus christ

59 notes · View notes