#and feeling like anakin did nothing to earn the respect he has

[jewishcissiekj]

spinning the co-parents AU (Anakin and Jedi!Asajj are both Ahsoka's Masters because of a misunderstanding) in my mind like all the time. the potential is endless.

[marvel-starwarsfangirl]

Crosshair's Character in TBB: A Study

“Loyalty means everything to the clones,”- Anakin Skywalker

I wanted to start my study with this quote because it basically personifies who Crosshair is as a person. Over the course of three seasons (plus CW), there is no doubt that Crosshair is arguably the most well-written and developed member of the Bad Batch. His journey and inner conflict isn’t neatly wrapped up in a little box and tied with a cute bow in only one season. No, his journey spans the entire show. It is very compelling, filled with a deep inner conflict, broken relationships, and the struggle to find one’s self again. In this study, I wanted to look at the major themes of his character and how his relationship to them has changed. 

Loyalty

Crosshair’s strongest and best quality is loyalty. It is everything to him and it’s why he reacts so strongly when the Batch leaves him in “Aftermath.” However, misplaced loyalty is dangerous, especially when it’s blinding. The core struggle of his character, specifically in season 1 and 2, is discovering who is worth his loyalty. Crosshair isn’t the type of person to just save his own skin when things get bad; S3 disputes that multiple times. As rude and off-putting as he can be, Crosshair cares deeply for others. Unfortunately, it’s the choices he makes and where he invests his loyalty that conflict arises. 

The Worth of Loyalty

A part of understanding Crosshair is understanding how far he will go for those he’s loyal to. 

“Do you know why they put me in charge? It’s because I’m willing to do what needs to be done.”

This line is stone-cold, but remove the context and apply it to Crosshair in general. It speaks volumes. Crosshair isn’t driven by some moral compass like Echo or Omega are. He’s not loyal to some grand cause. He’s loyal to people who’ve earned his respect. He’s loyal to those who value his skills as a sniper. Crosshair will not hesitate to go to extreme lengths for others. He killed Tawi Ames because he is a soldier of the Empire. He dragged a half-dead Mayday back to base because Mayday saved his life and showed him compassion. He went back to Tantiss for Omega because she saved him and he loves her. Crosshair’s journey is about him discovering who is worth that kind of loyalty. Who is worth dragging someone through sheer hell even though the optimal solution would be to just leave them? As Crosshair learns, it’s not the Empire.

The question remains, who is worth his loyalty? The answer is simple: Omega, his brothers, and other kind people such as Mayday and Cody. But Crosshair’s loyalty is severely misguided at first. There are a multitude of reasons as to why. One of the most obvious reasons is due to his fractured relationship with his brothers. By the time the entire Batch reunites in “Return to Kamino,” Crosshair can’t help but voice his pain and anger.

“They don’t leave their own behind… most of the time.” “You weren’t loyal to me.”

Due to the chip, Crosshair doesn’t understand why they left him. Did years of loyalty from Crosshair mean nothing to them? Did their relationship as brothers mean nothing? At that point in the story, he hasn’t realized how damaging the Empire is to him. So, he turns his anger to the group of people who meant more to him than anything else in the entire galaxy. And his anger isn’t completely unjustified. He was deeply hurt and he didn’t know why. Unfortunately, his beliefs about the Empire and struggle with identity push the Batch away. But as Crosshair’s feelings were continually challenged by others and his environment, he started realizing just how deep of a hole he’d gotten himself into. Crosshair’s brand of loyalty is something the chip absolutely would take advantage of. It’s fixating and fierce, hard to break. Only something severe such as removal or damage can break it. 

In S3, we get an exchange between Rampart and Crosshair. Rampart comments that Crosshair used to believe good soldiers followed orders. Crosshair responds that it depends on who’s giving them. This statement is absolutely true. Rampart doubts that Crosshair has changed, but it is Rampart who hasn’t changed. Both were betrayed by the Empire, but only one recognized where he went wrong. Crosshair now understands that his deep and fierce loyalty belongs to those who won’t hurt him or others he cares about. Loyalty is reciprocal and not to be taken for granted. This is a sentiment he shares with Howzer.

“Loyalty meant something to me. But with the Empire it didn’t go both ways.”

But Rampart can’t understand that because he’s only loyal to himself. And when you’re only loyal to yourself, you don’t care who around you falls. 

The Empire: An Environment of Shame

Why doesn’t Crosshair see just how bad the Empire is? That’s an argument I see often, but I think it’s important to understand just how manipulative and demonizing the Empire really is. Crosshair deeply internalizes his identity as a soldier. His value comes from his skills and if he can’t do his job properly, he will be discarded. The Empire is an echo chamber of that insecurity. 

“There are other ways of producing loyal soldiers”- Rampart

Rampart, Tarkin, Nolan… the faces of many imperials who remind Crosshair of what happens if his loyalty falters. He will be discarded. All around him, Crosshair hears the imperials speak about replacing the clones. They speak about the value of loyalty. It pushes him to keep proving his loyalty to the Empire. Crosshair is a sensitive soul despite appearances and he internalizes what others say around him. 

“Not the ones that matter.”- Cross to Hunter about the Empire phasing out clones

If Crosshair can continue fulfilling his purpose, then he will be spared, or at least that’s what he tells himself. We see this in real life too. Social media can influence others by feeding into their egos, only to rip them apart should they step out of line. It’s the same scenario with Crosshair. Rampart mocks Cody’s absence and talks about clone loyalty not being what it was advertised. Crosshair tenses up at his words, clearly bothered, until Rampart asks if he has a problem and then dismisses the issue without a care. The Empire makes Crosshair feel so alone. But he’s a soldier, right? This is where he belongs, right?

Compare that environment to the one put forth by Omega and Mayday. Omega is warm and compassionate. She cares deeply for others, even when that person probably doesn’t deserve it. As Crosshair struggles, Omega remains nothing but encouraging. She believed in him from the very beginning. 

“You’re still more capable than most.”- Omega

Omega’s constant display of loyalty and affection towards him eventually wins Crosshair over. He finds himself in an environment where his fierce devotion is not only reciprocated but goes above and beyond. Mayday shows compassion to Crosshair even though he barely knows him. He also shares Crosshair’s unspoken frustration. The Empire didn’t care about the clones despite them being good soldiers who followed orders. When danger strikes, Mayday doesn’t hesitate to protect Crosshair. Once again, it’s this reciprocated loyalty that shows Crosshair the truth behind the curtain. The Empire is all take and no give. Omega and Mayday display the opposite; they give Crosshair their all and don’t expect him to grovel on his knees for their praise or friendship.

Identity

But loyalty is only one major aspect of his character. Crosshair’s willingness to stay with the Empire also stems from his struggle with his identity. Clones are taught to be loyal and the behavioral modification chip only reinforces that notion. For Crosshair, it’s not so easy to just throw away something he grew up his entire life hearing. Thus, he finds himself in conflict between his loyalty to his brothers, loyalty as a clone, and identity as a loyal soldier. It’s so heartbreaking to see him when the chip partially activates. The chip makes him so fixated on Order 66 and yet, he can’t help but still stay by his brothers’ side. It is only when the chip is enhanced that he attacks his brothers. 

The Soldier and the Clone

The moment they are born, the clones are raised to be soldiers. They have no say in their fates, only that they have one purpose in life. Crosshair is no ordinary clone though; he’s labeled as defective for looking and sounding different. However, he has exceptionally sharp vision. One of the first things established about the Bad Batch is that they use unorthodox methods and they’re very showy. They also have a 100% success rate. As a result, Crosshair views himself and his squad as “superior.” As a soldier in the Empire, he expects to get the same recognition. The Empire is fueled by individuals who love feeling powerful. For Crosshair, to get special treatment because he’s a “superior” clone definitely would feed his ego. Unfortunately, the Empire also will pull the plug on anyone at any time. On Kamino, being defective is a death sentence. But Crosshair’s enhancement makes him useful; it’s why he was kept around. Interestingly, the more isolated Crosshair became in his time with the Empire, the more he began to seek companionship with the regs. S2 sees Crosshair shed his views that he’s a “superior” clone. He slowly begins to accept the fact that he and the other clones aren’t actually that different. We see this change in many ways: he tries to sit with the regs, he enjoys going on a mission with Cody, and he quickly gets attached to Mayday. 

Crosshair’s journey of accepting himself as a clone and finding companionship with others outside his squad humbles him and makes him an overall kinder person. It is integral in how he becomes disillusioned with the Empire. The Empire makes him feel so alone. Look at his room in “The Solitary Clone;” it’s no better than his cell on Tantiss. “Nat-borns” don’t understand what it is like to be a clone and his squad isn’t there anymore, so Crosshair turns to “regs.” He starts realizing that their experiences under the Empire aren’t much different from his. It’s Mayday and the mission on Barton IV that really pushes him over the edge. Mayday, a reg, understands him more than he’d like to admit. He’s lonely and feels like his efforts aren’t enough. 

Crosshair has let the Empire mistreat and abuse him for months, but eventually he snaps. He can’t do this anymore. He’s a person. Mayday is a person. Has his and Maydy’s loyalty meant nothing? Has the loyalty of the clones in general meant nothing? 

A clone’s identity is intrinsically tied to being a soldier. Why did Crosshair stay with the Empire? A simple answer is it gave him a purpose. Crosshair deeply internalizes his role as both a sniper and a soldier. He can’t see himself in another role as it is all he has known. What will happen when that’s taken away from him? Crosshair struggles with that exact dilemma. As I said early, being defective and unable to fulfill being a soldier means decommissioning and being discarded. I’ll bet this is why Crosshair struggles breaking away from his soldier mindset. He was taught to be loyal and there is no place for him if he can’t fulfill his purpose. Let’s take a look at his role as a sniper. Crosshair’s role is to wait on the outskirts and observe for danger. He’s supposed to keep his team safe from afar and spot trouble before it strikes. He’s a protector. That role gets shaken when his tremor starts. What happens to Crosshair if he can’t shoot? What happens to his brothers? 

S3 introduces the arc of Crosshair learning to accept help from others and becoming more than a soldier. A sniper is supposed to be distant, a loner, and always on the lookout. Once that role is challenged, suddenly, Crosshair realizes he can’t do this alone. He initially tries via brushing it off or shaking his hand. But it’s not enough. Both Hunter and Omega grow concerned. Omega takes the initiative and gently encourages Crosshair to try meditation with her. Even if it doesn’t work, the fact that he tries already speaks volumes. Throughout the season, Crosshair tries multiple times to do things alone. However, Hunter declines that proposal and says they should work together. The most glaring example is the climax of "The Cavalry Has Arrived." Crosshair is missing his dominant hand, weakened from his injury, and on top of that, it’s pouring rain and Hemlock has handcuffed himself to Omega. It is only through the help of his siblings that Crosshair makes the shot. He did it with the support of his family. 

In relying on his family, Crosshair becomes more than a sniper. He becomes more than a soldier. Even if he had his hand, Crosshair still would’ve had to overcome the huge barrier of making a steady shot. Either way, Crosshair overcomes by accepting the love and help from his family. Looking back, I’m really glad that this was a part of his arc. Crosshair has spent so much of the show alone, having to rely on himself and his skill to survive. But as time passes, he learns that it’s ok to have help. As people, we’re not meant to carry all our burdens alone. Crosshair learns he doesn’t have to remain distant all the time to protect others; sometimes, our greatest strength comes from each other.

The Beauty of Self-Worth

“Omega, don’t risk anything for me. I belong in here.” (This line is one of the most heartbreaking lines in the entire show). “So, I’m doing this alone. It’s what I deserve.”

A smaller, but just as important arc, is Crosshair’s journey of forgiveness. By “Tipping Point,” Crosshair has largely tackled his inner conflict. He knows who deserves his loyalty and who doesn’t. He realizes that he isn’t so different from the other clones. However, the guilt from his actions still lingers. Although he gets his message out, everything else fails. Tech dies, Omega is captured, and he doesn’t know what happened to the others. Crosshair suffers for a long 5 months due to Hemlock’s conditioning. His days are filled with the same mundane (and painful) routine and there is no sign of hope… that is, except for Omega. No matter what happened in the past, Omega undying love for him never yields. 

“None of us belong in here.”- Omega 

Omega’s words are reassuring and they hit Crosshair in a way he doesn’t expect. How can he, who has done these terrible things and has been forgotten by the world, be worth kindness? For all the times he said/did something cruel to Omega, she still came back for him. It’s Omega’s compassion that helps push Crosshair to finding his own self-worth. She loves him when nothing seems to be working for him. She encourages him to talk to his brothers. Crosshair wants to be accepted and belong again with his brothers. But up until that point in the narrative, everything around him seems to tell him the opposite. 

As much as I would’ve liked more from Hunter, I’m still glad he and Crosshair are able to have a conversation. In “The Return,” Crosshair admits how wrong he was. To come to terms with the darker parts of one’s self is important in forgiveness and the courage to do so is immense. There are things in life we as people can all do better. It’s what makes us human. The last time Crosshair interacted with his brother, it devolved into anger and pain-fueled argument. Crosshair so desperately wanted his brothers back, but it had to be on his terms. As the brothers fight again, Hunter antagonizes him into getting answers. A quick “blink and you’ll miss it” moment is that Cross’ hand trembles when Hunter brings up betrayal. Crosshair initially clamps up before biting back, blaming Hunter for Omega’s capture. But as both brothers learn to realize, both of them need to do better. The past hurts immensely because of that broken bond. Now, they have the opportunity to mend it. 

“I have regrets too, Crosshair. All we can do is keep trying to be better and who knows? There just might be hope for us yet.”- Hunter

Like Omega, Hunter’s words offer reassurance and comfort. Can Crosshair, a person who hurt his family, be worth that forgiveness? Hunter’s words all but confirm that Crosshair is forgiven in his eyes. Crosshair’s struggle to find forgiveness and worth in himself is eased by the people who he cares for the most. Even something simple as a hug from Wrecker catches him off guard, but it’s something that tells him “you’re loved and wanted.” As the vulture leaves the outpost, Crosshair slowly learns to forgive himself for what happened. 

It all culminates in the hug he gets from Omega in “The Cavalry Has Arrived.” Crosshair believed he deserved to die in order to atone. After everything he’s done and been through, does he still deserve a happy ending when it’s all over? Omega’s hug says yes. Tantiss is the heart of his pain and agony. In another world, Crosshair would never have set foot there if he chose differently. Perhaps Omega wouldn’t have suffered there. Perhaps Tech would still be alive… Without any hesitation, Omega wraps her arms around Crosshair and he is shocked. She reaches over to pull Hunter in and Hunter wraps his other arm around Crosshair, holding him close. And without any words, Crosshair leans in and closes his eyes. As the trio begin to head back to the shuttle, it’s Crosshair who reaches out and places his stump on Omega’s shoulder. In doing something as simple as leaning into the embrace, Crosshair accepts the love he is given. He lets himself be loved and understands that he is worthy of that love. 

This isn’t the end of Crosshair’s journey, of course. Crosshair has a very long and difficult road ahead of him. No, his PTSD wasn’t stored in his hand. Cutting off his hand isn’t a magical “cure” for it. Crosshair still has to work through a lot and he will. The big difference is that he knows he doesn’t have to work through it alone. With the help of his family, Crosshair can continue that journey of healing he began in “Bad Territory.” He’s so loved because he’s Crosshair, a brother, a protector, with fierce loyalty that could never be truly broken. 

Anyways, we’ve reached the end of my character study. Thank you all for reading. Crosshair is a very complex character and one who faces many trials. But no matter how many times he falls, he always finds a way to pick himself back up. At the end, he makes it. Crosshair has learned a lot, but I’m grateful that TBB team chose a long and complex route for him. Because guess what? Healing and growing as a person isn’t a “one size fits all” scenario. It’s a messy and difficult process. When all is said and done, Crosshair has one of the best realized redemption arcs in all of Star Wars and I couldn’t be more thrilled with how it played out.

[awritesthings1]

Here, there, and everywhere

Pairing: Anakin Skywalker/Reader

Summary: Takes place yearsssss after "How to Disappear" Epilogue.

-

“Take my hand, Ani.”

So he does, just like he has been doing over the past few decades.

“Am I dead?”

Your smile catches like little hooks in his skin, guiding him gently through the great, big puddle, which stretches infinitely on all sides. His feet aren’t wet, and there are no ripples or tension in the water. There is only stillness, silence, and you.

“Jedi don’t die, Ani. They move on to greater things.”

He likes that, he thinks. He isn’t too sure where he is, or even who he is, but he’s okay with that. The great, big silence, he realizes, is his own, so he steps back, expecting to hear the sloshing of water. He is caught between fear and wonder when the water remains still and quiet, seemingly unaffected by his presence, like he was never there.

You shush him and step forward to cup his cheeks. He protests for only a moment when he swears that he sees a Jedi with shaggy golden hair looking up at him with the same unsettled frown.

“Anakin, come back to me.”

He blinks because it is easy. He blinks because it’s easier to see nothing than to see a hundred mirrors looking at each other. He inhales sharply because it’s the human thing to do, and he gasps and lunges forward to clutch your shoulders when he can’t feel any air entering his lungs.

He expects you to shove him away, but you only pull him closer and bring his forehead to yours so he can steal the breath between your lips.

“Come back to me,” you whisper more insistently, brushing your thumbs over the vein on his neck, where he hopes his pulse is throbbing.

He hums and meets your eyes. It slows down the space around him, and he begins to see beyond the water, beyond the five senses, into a place where he is everywhere all at once. He is the seas, the mountains, the valleys, the people, the rain, and the sun all at once. And you are there too—the tree to his fruit, the grief to his mourning.

You paint in the colors around him. The first notable one is blue. You are blue, and he is blue. You are glowing like the falling rocks from space that light up the night sky, and he is the darkness watching your light with curiosity. And just when he thinks you are passing by, that smile of yours hooks itself deeper into his skin, and you are falling through the night air together.

He feels full and satiated when you share your blue glow with him. Together, you are the blue ghosts of the Force, wandering the land but not lost.

It is here, there, and everywhere that love follows.

You—the ever-experienced force ghost—teach him the Force all over again as if he were a youngling. He makes some awful joke about haunting some Jedi that got on his nerves, and you rightly tug on his ghostly blue Jedi cloak.

Oh.

That’s another thing.

He wears his Jedi uniform as a Force ghost, even if he wasn’t exactly loyal to the cause his whole life. It takes some getting used to; his cloak, for the most part, was permanently folded away on the top shelf in their Nabooian cottage. The uniform did nothing for the perilous summers on the coastal planet anyway. Now it hangs on his shoulders like it's never left.

It takes some time to come to terms with being a Force ghost, and he now holds more respect for you now that you’ve done it twice. He’s older now; you both are. You grew old together and lived. A part of him hurts when he sees his reflection in the still lake, vacant of all his hard-earned wrinkles and scars, all of which he proudly wore like badges to say, yes, I lived. Even in death, he is still a little stubborn. He’s still Anakin Skywalker. It’s just dissociating to see his past self when he was so unhappy and in a dark place. He doesn’t relate to that boy anymore. He’s grown, changed, and he wants to see that reflected in the water.

And when he’s ready to stand up and shift away into the wind, you’re there, hand on his shoulder, wearing that soft, understanding gaze, saying, I forgive you, I forgive you, I forgive you. Those three words banish the darkness and welcome him into a warm embrace of love. Forgiveness is never too late.

You take to your new life with the grace he remembers. It scares him at first, seeing you as the blue ghost that haunted him all that time ago. He tries to sink away when those feelings surface, but he knows you see right through him. It’s confronting prying open things he’d rather keep closed. There’s no privacy in his life. There’s no his life, only life. He belongs to the Force, and so do you, but you also live independent of the Force, and are just beings existing. It’s all very confusing.

But there’s one thing that still remains.

“Do you think Yoda is a Force ghost?” Anakin asks.

“Hm? Oh, yeah. He mentors orphans and teaches them the way of the Force,” you whisper, too focused on your meditation to say much more.

Anakin scoffs. “I’m that replaceable, am I?”

You sigh, open your eyes, and turn to him.

“Careful, Skywalker. Sounds like you’re getting jealous.”

“I’m not jealous!”

“Hmm.”

“I’m not!”

…

“Do you think Obi-Wan’s still around?”

You smile.

“He still dreams about you.”

Anakin perks up.

“He does? How do you know?”

A part of him already suspects the answer.

You intertwine your hands.

“He never stopped looking for you, Ani.”

A poison named guilt sours his tongue.

“I… I should go find him then. Tell him I’m fine.”

You shake your head. You’re not upset; you look more at peace.

“He knows, Ani. He knows.”

Anakin can’t quite understand how, he’s still new to this Force ghost thing.

“…And he’s happy?”

You nod with a smile and squeeze his hand.

Only one more thing troubles Anakin.

“Do you think I’ll ever see him again?”

“He’ll come find you when he’s ready.”

You pull him into your arms, and he buries his nose in the crook of your shoulder like old times. Your laughter lifts his spirits.

“You have much to learn, young Padawan.”

There’s no place to start like the end.

[tennessoui]

Just wanted your opinion on the zygerrian arc I'm not sure if these was discussed before here, I feel like these arc could have been improved on. Like Anakin in the episode how his introducing himself to the queen giving Ahsoka as a slave and then flirting with her wooing her in the process.

I don't believe that, Anakin "I don't like sand" Skywalker shouldn't be able to whisper sweet nothing into a slave queen ear and woo her it's not in his character and especially his nature. These fic I found had a better idea of how the arc should have played out.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/34782355#main

In a comic it did Anakin better where he pulled Ahsoka to the side and told her up straight the dangers she's putting herself in and trying to convince her to back out of it, which she doesn't and they go along with the plan with Ahsoka trying to make the situation lighter joked about how she's still able to call him master as a slave and Anakin replying seriously "Thats not funny". Which makes me want to see his transition of the word master to a more healthier (?) one towards Obi Wan.

I feel like if Anakin still played the role he wouldn't have flirted with the queen, she's everything he hates. He'll obligates her attention/presence for the sake of the mission but he will not bring himself to play along with her attraction. Specking of, the Queen can still have an attraction to Anakin because his pretty but we could go further where she likes Anakin because he has spirit and she wants to break that.

We learn that she doesn't like damaging goods and she prefer mentally breaking them into obedience, and that's what she wants to do to Anakin. Where at first she likes him because his pretty but when it was reveled that his a jedi she's more interested in him because of it, breaking a jedi spirit and making him her servant would be a big power play to her.

..... Which is not making me think now of how she will never have that title to him because he already has a master who didn't train him say it but earned it, not with fear or defeat but with love and respect. Sorry these was long I feel very strongly about these 🤣. I hope your having a good day!!

hmmm ok i don't really have an opinion on the zygerrian arc....it's something i've only seen once, like a year ago, and it's not something i tend to think about

i know a ton of people act like this is just so out of character for anakin and it feels like a betrayal of his past and his principles, but tbh....i think that's at least a bit of the point?

maybe i'm just reading the arc with too much good faith, but it honestly sort of feels like anakin's deception arc. not in a 'he's lying and hurting those he loves' way, but in a 'war can strip us of our principles if we're not careful. when we do everything we think is necessary to win, we may become more monstrous than we thought ourselves capable of' way.

like i mean obviously, the real monster is the queen, but anakin, who was a slave himself, does flirt with her. does try to stay in her good graces. and it's for the greater good. he isn't doing it for anything but the greater good and information and a shit ton of lives.

but i think people really hate this arc, and i can totally see why it makes people uncomfortable---i really don't think all of the writers' choices are thought through, especially ahsoka's role in it from the audience's perspective---but. but. i also sort of can see what they were aiming for with this arc.

war and espionage make strangers of us all. sometimes you do something that you know that your five-year-old self would never forgive you for, but you have to keep going because you have to believe you know more than your five-year-old self.

[piecesofeden11]

WIP - Yet to be titled Obikin Fanfiction

.... okay okay ... here goes nothing! This is utterly un-beta-ed, will probably undergo many changes still but ... just to put something out there for once! Have a snippet of this WIP:

His head was still throbbing when Anakin arrived at the Temple. His plan to head directly to his room, however, was thwarted by a guard approaching him with a summons to the Council Chambers. Just what he needed today. Another session of graciously accepting criticism of his every choice in battle, every flaw in his behavior. He sighed. On the other hand, he would have a chance to talk to Obi-Wan afterwards and maybe that would help clear his mind a little bit.

As he arrived at the Chamber he was informed that the Council was already in session and that he would be summoned the moment they had time. He bristled a bit at that. His day was destined to consist of waiting around in front of doors, it seemed. He sank into one of the chairs provided in the ante-chamber and once again, let his thoughts run their course, sinking into darker and darker places when he felt a gentle prodding against his mind.

Obi-Wan's signature washed over him like a balm and he allowed himself to bask in it for a moment. Confidence flooded his mind and he relaxed. Whatever the Council had in store for him, Obi-Wan was right there and would have his back.

When he was finally admitted, he sought his Master's eyes immediatly and was relieved to see him smiling, layed back in his chair with one leg up over the other. It surely could not be bad news then.

Bowing at each of the Coucil members in turn, Anakin focused his gaze on Master Yoda who gave him one of his utterly unreadable stares in return.

It was Mace Windu who spoke up after all and Anakin shifted his gaze slightly.

"Thank you for joining us on such short notice, Skywalker! I take it you have not had a chance to speak with Obi-Wan yet?"

"No, Masters."

"A pleasant surprise this shall be than!"

A surprise? That was a new one. Anakin dared to glance at Obi-Wan again, who was still smiling warmly while something akin to pride was glowing in the bond. What was going on here?

"Anakin Skywalker! The Council has decided to grant you the seat vacated by the later Master Piell. You have proven yourself worthy of the position on numerous occassions over the last few years and Master Kenobi has made a rather convincing plea in your favor!"

The world seemed to tilt on its axis for a moment. Had he heard that correctly? Anakin looked around the room, searching for a clue if he was being pranked, if somehow he was imagining things but all he found was the members of the Council, his *fellow* members, looking at him expectantly. Was he supposed to say something to that? He swallowed and reach out to Obi-Wan once more, seeking an anchor as the world continued to spin around him.

"One condition there is, however, to making you a Council Member!"

Yoda's words made the spinning stop momentarily and Anakin turned again to face him.

"While a member of the Council you will be .... grant you the titel of Master we will not!"

He must have misheard and his disbelief must have shown on his face as a murmer went around the room.

"I'm sorry, what?"

"Anakin!"

Obi-Wan's voice held a hint of warning but Anakin did not feel inclined to pay attention to reason right now.

"With all due respect, I don't understand why I should be given a seat but not become a Master? What more do I need to do to proof that I earned the titel?"

"Final the council's decision is on the matter. A master you are not yet!"

"Take your seat, Skywalker! The matter is not up for discussion!"

Stunned into silence, Anakin wandered over to the empty chair that was now his own seat and sank into the cushion. Around him the Council resumed it's discussion of whatever matters of importance were on the agenda. Anakin barely registered any of it, his mind a boiling mess of questions. He glanced towards Obi-Wan again, hoping to find some form of answer there but his Master appeared perfectly engrossed in whatever report Master Mundi was currently giving and the bond was firmly sealed. So Anakin was left to fume in silence until the meeting was adjurned.

[levitatingbiscuits]

How would Anakin and the others react if they ever found out the truth about OB-1?

Kenobi was a cockroach. A thorn in Sidious’s side that never fell out no matter how many deadly missions the kindly old chancellor personally requested that he take. One might think that the exhaustion would make him sloppy, if nothing else, but Kenobi handled everything Sidious threw at him with a dogged determination and competence that seemed beaten into his DNA. At times he acted more like a droid programmed to be the perfect Jedi than a real, flawed sentient; obedient and selfless to a fault, utterly unwilling to advocate for himself but frustratingly eager to advocate for others. His Force signature never wavered, never fell out of balance no matter how Sidious stacked the scales. 

Surely Kenobi must have some weakness, a psychological hangup to exploit or some emotional scar to rip back open. Sidious hired someone to slice into his Temple records, then hired a bounty hunter to take care of the slicer.

What he found was intriguing, but frustratingly incomplete. Wide swaths of the record from his time as a padawan were vague to nonexistent. There was nothing indicating why Jinn had taken him on in the first place, nor why he hadn’t returned to Coruscant at all for the first few years of his apprenticeship.

Sidious knew how to hide things. It made him very good at sniffing out others’ secrets.

Weeks of snooping eventually led to Halle Burtoni, the senator from Kamino, who told him the delicious truth of the matter without even having to be bribed or threatened for it. She was eager to brag; the Jedi clone was Kamino’s most successful product.

And so Sidious kept the truth to himself, waiting for the most opportune moment to twist it to his will.

-

Rex shares an eye roll with Cody when Skywalker steps out of the command tent to take a “very important comm message.” It’s either the chancellor or Senator Amidala; Skywalker never answers that quickly for anyone else.

General Kenobi stands hunched over the holotable, projecting the terrain where the newest Seppie stronghold is. The locals are, as usual, worse than useless when it comes to defending their own planet, so Kenobi’s brow is already pinched even though they haven’t yet seen combat.

Rex is never sure how to help his oldest brother when he gets like this. With any other brother he would; ages hardly mattered among the rest of the vode, but Kenobi holds both seniority and authority over the rest of them. He takes his role as ori’vod, as their protector and leader, seriously, even though most of the GAR don’t realize the meaning behind it. 

Rex can’t understand it. His brothers are the most important thing in the galaxy to him, but Kenobi gets all of the responsibility with none of the brotherhood. He’ll respect his wishes to keep it quiet, all the same.

Skywalker comes storming back into the tent, scowl thunderous and saber ignited, and Rex jumps to attention--has there been an attack? 

“Anakin?” the general asks, straightening up. “What’s--”

And then Skywalker levels the saber at a startled General Kenobi.

Cody’s hand is immediately on his blaster, but he doesn’t draw. Rex doesn’t either. He has no idea what to do.

“What in the Force’s name has possessed you now? Were you eating strange bugs again?” Kenobi demands irately. He makes no move to draw his own saber. His trust in Skywalker is, even in this situation, absolute.

“Shut up,” Skywalker snarls. “Captain, Commander, restrain this man.”

“General Skywalker, I cannot allow you to do this,” Cody snaps, shoulders tense with anger.

“He’s an impostor!” Skywalker yells. “A clone!”

Rex’s stomach sinks like a tubie learning to swim. If Skywalker hadn’t known Kenobi was a clone beforehand--if nobody had realized but him--

“He replaced Obi-Wan for kriff knows how long, and no one noticed!” Behind the mask of rage, Skywalker’s eyes are frightened. “I didn’t notice!”

Rex had. Rex had noticed almost as soon as the damn war started.

Cody, who doesn’t know that it was the clone who had earned his loyalty instead of the natborn, jumps to cuff him after that. Kenobi doesn’t struggle. Rex starts to help a few seconds later, mind a screaming void of panic and guilt, and his heart clenches when Kenobi cuts him a concerned, questioning glance.

This may be a Seppie spy, may be an enemy that Rex helped, but he’s still acting like a brother.

“I suppose I always knew it would come out eventually,” Kenobi says once he’s chained to the center tent pole. He doesn’t sound mocking or angry or even worried. He sounds resigned.

“Drop the act,” Skywalker orders. “You’re not Obi-Wan, stop pretending to be him.” He looks deeply unsettled. Rex has only ever known the clone Kenobi, but Skywalker must have grown up with the original. 

Kenobi meets his eyes steadily. “This is what I was made for. I’ve always been him.”

“I don’t care what the Separatists told you, you are not him,” Skywalker says. 

For the first time, Kenobi looks surprised. “The Separatists? I wasn’t commissioned by the Separatists, that’s ridiculous.”

Skywalker is incensed, but Cody looks ashen. This must be overwhelming for someone who thought Kenobi was a natborn until a minute ago. There’s also the sobering implications of a third party with the power to dispose of, and replace, a Jedi Master, without anyone noticing. How many more Jedi could be plants?

Surprisingly, it’s Kenobi who breaks the silence. “I understand your... reservations, but this frankly seems like an overreaction. We are in the middle of a campaign, Anakin--”

Skywalker backhands him across the face. The loud crack that reverberates through the tent tells Rex that it’s with the metal one.

“Shut up, meat droid!” Skywalker roars. Rex feels sick and hot hearing that term from his general. “You aren’t him, so stop acting like it.”

Kenobi breathes deeply through his nose for a second. His lip is split. “I understand that my discovery means that I will be decommissioned, as per contract, but I must advise that doing so in the middle of a war is a waste of resources.”

It is very, very strange to hear High General Kenobi talk about being decommissioned so frankly. Every other clone is terrified of being decommissioned, of being recycled into raw organic matter for more clones to be grown from, like natborns are of death. Kenobi talks like he’s always known it would happen eventually.

“You are vastly overestimating your own importance, clone,” Skywalker says, and Rex has to fight not to flinch at the anguish that darts across Kenobi’s face. “Tell me where Obi-Wan is.”

“Dead,” Kenobi says, the word as loud as a detonation. “He’s been dead for years.”

Skywalker stumbles back. “No,” he says, voice trembling. “No, I would have known. I would have felt it.”

“How could you have felt it?” Kenobi pleads, “Anakin, you have me.”

It’s the wrong thing to say.

-

The interrogations continue for days. The men are confused and restless, the campaign indefinitely put on hold. The 212th are especially restless, having gone days without word from their general. Even Cody drifts aimlessly around the camp without saying much to anyone. Rex thinks he’s mourning, but doesn’t know how to tell him that he probably never even met the prime version of his general without getting decommissioned himself for not reporting General Kenobi’s clone status sooner. 

Rex and Skywalker are the only ones who go into the command tent, now. Rex technically isn’t supposed to, but Skywalker definitely isn’t following POW protocol and Kenobi won’t be able to answer any questions if he doesn’t at least get water.

Rex goes there now, once it’s past dark and Skywalker is holed up in his own tent. The 501st clones guarding the tent look just as conflicted as he feels; he doesn’t envy them for having to listen to the interrogations. Not many of the men know who’s in there, because if too many of the 212th find out there will be a real risk of widespread mutiny. Hell, learning that their general is a clone would just make them more loyal, not less.

Kenobi’s face is so bruised, beaten, and bloodied that it’s almost unrecognizable. He thinks that’s probably why Skywalker did it in the first place.

Rex kneels next to the tent pole to help Kenobi sip from a canteen, and is shamefully relieved that he doesn’t bother opening either black eye. His hands are still bound behind his back; it looks like Skywalker’s broken a few of his fingers. From the way he winces when Rex touches him, he’s probably broken more than just that.

“Sir, you have to answer his questions,” Rex whispers, both to avoid being overheard and to keep his voice from wavering. “I... I’m worried Skywalker is going to kill you.”

“Oh, he definitely will,” Kenobi rasps once he’s chugged the whole bottle. His chuckle is wry and forced. “No use denying the inevitable.”

“Why can’t you tell us who commissioned you? Are they a threat to the Republic?”

“No, he was just as loyal as you or I,” General Kenobi says. That’s all he’s said to Skywalker for the past few days: I am loyal to the Republic. He learned pretty quick that saying anything else that wasn’t an answer to a direct question wouldn’t end well. “And even if he weren’t, he’s long dead.”

“As long dead as your prime?”

“No,” Kenobi says, beaten face unreadable but body tense, “Not quite so long as that.”

Rex scrubs a hand over his shorn head in frustration. “Why are you protecting him, if he’s dead? You’re the only one who will be hurt if you refuse to talk.”

“Because Anakin would be hurt,” Kenobi says softly. “Anakin worships him. Loves him far more than he loved me, if he ever truly did.”

Rex wants to refute that. Anyone who’s seen them interact before this fiasco would know just how deeply Skywalker respects and trusts his master, but...

All those feelings are for the prime. They are not for the clone that took his place, so fully and flawlessly that even the man who loved him best never noticed. 

“So Skywalker knew him?” Rex probes. The general’s silver tongue is looser than normal today.

“I doubt anyone truly knew him but me. No one ever suspected... no one cared enough,” Kenobi murmurs, head slumping to the side. Rex puts a gentle palm on the least bloody part of his forehead, and hisses when he finds it hot.

“Kriff, you’re burning up, vod. You need a medic.”

Kenobi doesn’t respond. He might be unconscious.

Rex sits in a dark tent with a cloned Jedi, a brother, who might be dying right beside him, and makes a choice.

The comm takes a while to connect (come to think of it, Rex has no idea what time it is in the senate district on Coruscant) but then there’s Fox, looking sleep deprived and livid, as always.

“CT-7567? What the hell is going on with the Open Circle fleet? You haven’t contacted the Order in a week, the senate thinks you’re either dead or MIA.”

“Vod, you have to help me,” Rex begs, surprising Fox into silence. “Contact the council. Tell them Skywalker is killing General Kenobi.”

[hellowkatey]

Febuwhump Day 20

Prompt: Betrayal

Read on AO3

Shattered... (from a Certain Point of View)

Never in Rex's short life did he think he would ever betray his Jedi. None of them. Not General Kenobi or Skywalker. Certainly not Commander Tano. To follow orders was part of his programming, but not only that. He would follow his leaders to hell and back if they asked him-- if he considers Umbara or Zygerria and Kadavo hell, then he truly did. The Jedi have become honorary brothers in his mind. They put their lives on the line right next to him and the others, most of the time more-so. They've saved his life more times than he can count, only to be rivaled by the number of times they've gotten him into trouble.

They earned his respect. His friendship. And the respect and friendship of the other men.

Which is why, when the hooded figure shows up on the holo and utters a phrase Rex has never heard before, but suddenly just knows what to do...

"Execute Order 66"

He feels a part of him snap into place, and another part of him shatter into pieces.

"Yes, Lord Sidious," he replies, a surge of adrenaline and anger coursing through him. The door behind him opens, and Rex tightens the grip on his blaster.

But when he hears her voice...

"Rex!"

So familiar, tugging at memories so fond.

"It's Anakin."

Another name he knows too well. Too closely. The hand holding his helmet begins to quiver.

"I feel like something terrible has happened."

Something terrible is about to happen. It's the strangest sensation. Like his mind has been split into two and both sides are fighting for dominance. One side is telling him to draw his blaster and shoot Ahsoka Tano before she has a chance to do a thing. He's a quick shot, and if he misses there are guards at the door.

Good soldiers follow orders.

The other side is screaming at him. Pleading him. No! This is wrong! You can't do this!

His helmet slips from his grip and clatters to the floor. She's still standing behind him, and he can hear the confusion in her voice as the commlink tones of the other troopers begin to chime in.

"Rex?"

He knows the sound of blasters being aimed far too well. The two guards have received their orders. In a moment Ahsoka Tano will be dead. Rex draws in a breath. The mere thought of that as a truth, makes his entire body feel numb.

"No," he says firmly, but the shake in his voice is undeniable. He turns around, taking in the sight of the two troopers with orange and white painted helmets ready to fire. "I'll do it,"

"Rex? What's happening?"

He doesn't even remember picking up both his blasters before he's raising them, both pointed straight at her head. Staring down barrels, Rex finally looks at her. Looks her in the eye. All he can see in her big blue eyes and young face is the look of utter confusion and alarm. A kid! She's only a kid!

"Stay back!" he yells. His hands have never shaken like this before but now they won't stop. He's taken countless lives in this--this war for the Republic. Or for the Separatists? Who is winning now? Was anyone ever winning? He has no idea. What he does know is his hands have never shaken and he hardly ever misses a shot, but right now it is looking like both of these things are his reality. A part of him is frustrated and a part of him is praying to whatever higher power that may be listening that he misses this shot, please. "Find him," he says, feeling that his free will is quickly being overtaken. Like a parasite invading his brain, the good memories of Tano, Skywalker, and Kenobi are being pushed out by force. "Find him. Fives."

He can't take it anymore.

"Find him!" he screams and then fires his blaster wildly in the wrong direction. It's all the warning she needs. Ahsoka bolts into action, moving faster than his eyes can even perceive. Faster than he can react to her body slamming into his and cracking the back of his head into the console. White-hot pain flashes through him and he crumbles to the ground with black spots dancing before his eyes.

Execute Order 66, the shrill voice echos in his mind. Kill the Jedi. Good soldiers follow orders.

He groans, pushing through the haze of pain and blaster shots to get back on his feet. He hears his name being called, sounding faraway, but he can feel that it's near.

Rex starts to fire again. And again. Not really knowing where he's aiming, just knowing that he needs to kill the Jedi.

And when she disappears, the urge only grows.

__________

They search the ship. Tirelessly. Frantically. Like nothing else has mattered this much the entire war.

Except it has. Everything has been an uphill battle and we have done it every time with the help and guidance of the Jedi.

He grits his teeth. Nearly slams his fist into the wall of the lift he's in. Their orders are to execute her.

When have the orders of this Lord Sidious ever mattered before?

Rex's shoulder slams into a doorframe he wasn't paying attention to. He hisses at the blunt pain, shakes it off. A squad of troopers passes him in a steady jog.  Headed to their sector. They will find her if they have to tear this ship apart.

He starts to run, but is caught by troublesome droids blocking his path. He slams into one, taking an opportunity to kick it.

"Hey! Hey, out of the way." The droid seems to laugh at him, and he has half a mind to run his blaster through it instead. Then the blast doors shut around him, locking him in the hallway. "Are you cross-wired?"

A holographic Commander Tano appears from within the droid. "Rex. I think I know what's happening. I saw your report on Fives,"

Fives. Rex's entire body shutters at the remembrance of his death. How he fell limp in his arms.

"It isn't your fault." There's a surprising amount of sympathy in her eyes to be looking at the man who just tried to murder her. "You were programmed. Your mind was altered to do this when you were very young. I can help you."

Good soldiers follow orders.

You were programmed.

The hologram dissipates. His eyebrows slant. Another surge of anger from a place deep with him. He points the blaster at the droid as if it could tell him anything of use. "Where is she?"

"I'm right here," as he turns, a burst of electricity shoots through him, and the world goes black.

__________

The sound of battle wakes Rex up better than any alarm. His heart is already pounding with adrenaline, but when he opens his eyes he finds he is much less prepared for battle than his body seems to be.

His head is pounding. Lights too bright. He tries to process what's going on around him.

Medbay. Lights in medbay. Blasters. Stretcher. Injured? Lightsaber.

Lightsaber. Ahsoka.

Rex pushes through the wave of nausea and finds himself on the receiving end of an endless stream of blaster shots. He'd be more blaster wounds than man if it weren't for Commander Tano crouched at the end of his bed, the bright blue of her lightsabers moving at an impossible speed. She blocks every single blast with perfect precision, but Rex realizes none are being aimed back at the troopers.

The troopers are trying to kill her. He reaches for his guns as a blast manages to strike her shoulder and she staggers back. He aims them as she screams for the droid to respond, her energy obviously waning.

Rex remembers the last time he picked up both his blasters. They were pointed at his Jedi. Armed to kill. But the feeling is suddenly gone from his system. The voice no longer echos in his mind.

He aims. He shoots. This time, he doesn't miss.

Four brothers cry out as his shots hit as they always do, their bodies falling as the door finally shuts. In the sudden silence of immediate ceasefire, Commander Tano turns around and looks at him with those big blue eyes. Her young face is full of confusion and alarm..,. but also hope.

And to see her look at him with hope is the worst possible way she could have looked at him because. when he looks at her all he can see is the reflection of his own betrayal. She shouldn't be staring at him with such concern, moving toward him instead of running away.

His hands start to shake again. He's still pointing his pistols at her, but his fingers aren't even on the triggers. He is just too shellshocked to know what to even do right now. If she ignited her sabers and took him out, he wouldn't blame her in the slightest.

She should hate him. She should kill him. She has every right to that.

Instead, she asks if he is okay.

No, I am not okay... but hearing her voice calms him. Snaps him out of the haze of waking up to such a shock, and he slowly lowers the blasters.

"Yeah. Yeah, kid, I'm okay."

The pounding in his head begs to differ. He reaches up to the source, feeling a thick bandage on the side of his head. You were programmed.

They put a chip in his head to control him when they needed him. To control all of the clones.

"I was framed because I know the truth... the truth about a plot. A massive deception... A sinister plot in the works against the Jedi!"

Shame courses through him at the judgment he cast upon his friend. The disbelief at what he was saying. Fives knew. Fives was right.

"It's in all of us. Every clone."

Every clone.

It sounded crazy at the time. He thought Fives had lost it the way he'd seen countless other brothers descend into madness.

"It's bigger than any of us. Than anything I could have imagined."

Now Rex sees it. The entire plan in action with no way of stopping it. The clones have their orders to kill their Jedi, and he knows for a fact that on their own, the Jedi don't stand a chance against their battalions of thousands.

"I just wanted to do my duty... The mission... the nightmares... they're finally... over"

Fives' last words hit him like a speeder to the stomach. All this time they were put here not to fight and die for the Republic, but to act as sleeper agents until they were needed. Mere pawns created for Lord Sidious's master plan that Rex doesn't even fully understand. What scenario constitutes a purging of an entire religion? It's a war crime at the very least. Their duty was always what they were told to do... but no more. He is tired of being a pawn. He doesn't have anything forcing him into obedience hidden within his mind.

Now, he has a new duty. To stay by Commander Tano's side, and try to stand by those who fought alongside them the last few years. Good soldiers follow orders, but better soldiers do what's right.

[obaby-wan]

Unlawful

Summary: Anakin is still a novice and Obi-Wan goes on solo missions. That is until the Council gives him a particular assignment, and he requests you to join him - posing as a couple. You had not seen much of your close friend since he lost his Master, and the mission serves as an interesting reunion.

Pairing: Obi-Wan Kenobi x Jedi!Reader

Wordcount: 9.5k I AM SORRY

Rating: T?

Warnings: Hurt? Slavery, child trafficking, mention of kidnapping. Someone inappropriately approaches Reader. Please let me know if forget something. But otherwise rather safe, basically soft fluff with a plot(ish).

Notes: I’ve done it! I’ve posted my first fic EVER, thanks to @maybege​! This was her request for a fake marriage!Obi-Wan, which was a very scary and challenging and intimidating request given that it is the basis of her Play Pretend series, but I am overall quite proud of what I have produced. Naturally, any feedback is very much welcomed. Thank you!

Tags: @maybege​ @profkenobi​ maybe? If you have time and are interested and want to make a little me very happy but no pressure

You put down three cups and the teapot you had prepared, the smoky aroma steaming out from its mouth. Your life-long best friend Obi-Wan Kenobi and his padawan were seated across from you in your quarters, the young one still recovering from the training session he just finished with other younglings, his arms crossed and lips pouting. Obi-Wan has approached you earlier with a mission brief, suggesting - no, requesting, really - that you accompany him. Without his padawan. This earned you both a resentful silent treatment from him ever since said padawan has arrived and learned that he will not be needed. You, on the other hand, were internally as giddy and excited as Anakin was moody. You had only recently been knighted yourself. Your solo mission count was now steadily increasing, their success rate following the same trend. Yet, you still welcomed new assignments with the same eagerness you had in your early padawan days. Not to mention that this time, it seemed you will be partnering with your favourite Jedi master.

“Don’t look so frustrated, Anakin. Your first mission will come sooner than expected.” You smiled at the young boy, your words doing nothing to alleviate the frown between his brows. “Honey?”

He nodded in agreement, extending his hand to accept the cup you offered. You slide Obi-Wan his cup and put yours down in front of you, twirling the liquid around in an attempt to accelerate the cooling process. No honey for neither of you. Not with smoked teas. “Only fruited infusions deserve a bit of sweetness” He once told you. You had thought the words he spilled over your tea conversations were enough of a sweetener.

“Maybe I could come and pretend to be your son?” Anakin’s voice was small, hopeful. This pulled a laughter out of you and Obi-Wan, his smiling eyes meeting yours. The mission he was assigned involved infiltrating the court of a powerful king in the outer-rim, thought to be the general quarters of a slave trafficking ring. Young, underage slave traffic, to be specific, which explained why Obi-Wan would not let Anakin join. You wondered if he even told him about the nature of this mission. Your presence was requested to play to role of his spouse. The king was soon hosting his bi-yearly public exposition of newly acquired slaves, presenting them to potential buyers and you were to pose as a couple of such. It could have been a solo mission, but the king had a harem of wife whom the council suspected to be heavily involved in the court’s internal affair, and only women were allowed to interact with the spouses. That is why and where you were stepping in.

Obi-Wan shook his head, putting a hand on his padawan’s shoulder. “It is better you stay here, little one. Focus on your training. Besides, I believe you will be in possession of your lightsaber when we get back - and I expect you to be able to strike me down on our next spar”. They both smirked at the unspoken challenge.

“Is that true?” You took a zip of tea. “I was not aware you were already chosen to be in the next shuttle to Ilum. That is impressive”. The young boy’s chest puffed up with pride. “Master Yoda said it was learning too fast for the youngling group I am with!”

You glanced at Obi-Wan. Anakin building his own lightsaber meant he will have to take his training more into hands, relying less on common lessons with other young Jedi. Which also means that the time of his solo missions was short-lived and coming to an end soon. You were honored to be part of what could even be his last padawan-less assignment. Yes, this will definitely be an entertaining mission, a reminiscence of your mischiefs and adventures before you were both knighted.

You’ve know Obi-Wan for almost all your life, having arrived at the Jedi temple around the same moon as him. You were probably in the same crèche, although you did not have much recollection of that time. No, your friendship with him genuinely blossomed on the very same occasion that Anakin will soon face – the Kyber harvesting on Ilum. You were both selected for the same trip, the two youngest of your training group, and the two bests. A friendly competition ensued, which over time grew into a deeper complicity, unspoken rivalry trying to best each other’s records, pressed lips failing to suppress giggles when sneaking into the kitchen past bed time, understanding glances across training rooms when one would get caught and chastised, longing and warm reunions after your respective missions during your years as padawans and – support and understanding when he lost Qui-Gon, a dozen moons ago.

You had been the one to cut his braid off. You had taken the habit to keep your quarters unlocked for nights when meditation would no longer suffice to tone down the guilt and the grief he felt, preferring to spill his sadness to you over a cup of tea, burning his tongue on the beverage. You had watched as tears dripped into his cup, hoping the hot tea would burn away the sadness, too. He was grateful for your patience and comfort, always listening without a judgement. How he was unsure about being a master. How he did not feel ready to train Anakin. How he feared he would fail. “But fear is not the Jedi way”, he has whimpered in the dark, sitting on the floor in front of you, legs crossed, his forehead pressed to your knees as you sat on your bed. “No. But it is the human way” you had answered, your fingers slowly stroking his golden red locks in an attempt to sooth his ache.

You push those memories away. Obi-Wan has recovered, in his own way. He has slowly but surely gained confidence in his skills and his ability to pass them on, even warming up to referring to Anakin as his “little one” more often than as his padawan. The informality was not lost on you. The boy was clinging to his master like a young greysor to its mother, looking up to the man and telling him all details about his day in great lengths and details over dinner, every evening. Your eyes settled on your friend, realizing that it has been a while since you’ve got a chance to study his features with such proximity and you could not recall the last time you had been alone with him. You noticed how his traits have hardened since, how his hair, longer and now always neatly arranged, was now framing his mature face. He even started growing a beard, which you had not yet decided if you liked or not. His cerulean eyes met yours, and you couldn’t help but melt a little when you realized that those, at least, have remained as soft as you remembered. Anakin must be equally succeeding at painting more wrinkles and frowns to Obi-Wan’s traits as he has at keeping his heart tender.

“I am happy to hear that. I’m sure you will find your little trip to be insightful and… dangerous”. A spark returned to the boy’s eyes upon hearing your last word. He shuffled a little in his seat, his resentment about the mission suddenly forgotten and replaced with a curious fascination. You jumped on the occasion to ensure his mood remains lightened, a smug look on your face. “Have I told you about the time your master and I went to find our crystals, and Obi-Wan was afraid the dark?”

…………………………………………………………………………………………

Your destination coordinates where set into the navicomputer, the autopilot engaged. Everything was settled for the travel, and you both decided to indulge with an early dinner, hoping to be able to get a full night of sleep before landing at your destination. Obi-Wan headed for the ship’s kitchenette, opening the cooling storage and excitedly took out two packs of what appeared to be rye soup. “This is wonderful! I usually only get ration bars on these council ships”. He skipped back to you, face beaming, holding a box in each hand. He was met with your suspicious glare, lips tight together.

“Come on now darling, I only have to heat it up. There is no way I can mess this up”.

“Obi-Wan, I would trust you with my life, but allow me to doubt you on this one”.

You took the boxes from an exasperated Obi-Wan and headed back to the kitchenette, deciding that you will take cooking matters in your hands. Obi-Wan was… lousy, when it came to handling sustenance in any other way than putting it directly in his mouth (and even then). Burnt eyebrows and meals have been evidence of his previous attempts, and you may even have a scar somewhere on your arm, a relic of that time he believed the oven would be a safer cooking method. He had apologized profusely after managing to short circuit and set the whole thing on fire and had treated you with take-out from Dex’s every time you were meeting up for weeks after the incident. “If it still hurts, I can try to kiss the pain away.” He swore it was not just an imaginary balm for younglings, something about receptors and muscles and pain signals. You pretended the burn stung for days after you had removed the last bacta patch.

Once dinner was prepared and ready without having to call an intergalactic fire brigade, you both settled around the small and only table on the ship. Obi-Wan was practically lounging on the bench seat, and you were pleased that despite your high and respected status of Jedi Master, he would still feel comfortable relaxing casually around you. You set your bowls on the table and sat on the opposite bench.

“I have got to ask though Obi, why did you choose me for this mission? The council could have just assigned anyone else”.

You hoped the question did not come out as a complaint. You were more than happy – looking forward to, even – to start this mission with him. Although you knew that assignments from the Jedi council were usually of the utmost importance and highly serious, undercovers still help an aftertaste of game to you. And who better to disguise yourself with than your favourite partner?

“Well, given the delicate nature of our role, I would rather conduct this mission with someone I truly feel at ease with. Besides, I can’t imagine having to kiss Master Shaak Ti, if it came to that”. He laughed lightly at the image, raising a spoonful of soup to his lips – and burning the tip of his tongue on it. “I keep telling Anakin to be patient, but I daresay I cannot ever wait for my meals to cool down”.

You chuckled in response, hoping he did not notice the blood rushing to your cheeks. While you were glad he confessed to feeling serene in your presence, you had to admit you did not think of the implication of this disguise. You knew Obi-Wan well enough to be able to read him, and the Force could help you anticipate his actions. This would allow you to pass as long-term, close acquaintances, but how exactly were lovers behaving together, in public? How much affection must a crime lord couple display to pass as, well, a real, intimate crime lord couple? “We may need to go through quite a bit of details before we land. You know, setting our story straight and such”. He nodded, now passively stirring his bowl, his eyes fixing you intently. You averted his gaze and dipped your spoon in the rich soup, catching yourself realizing that you wouldn’t mind so much if the mission was to “come to that”. You made a mental note to strengthen your walls and empty your mind before landing.

“You must know, I am glad you accepted to join me. I haven’t got the chance to enjoy your company since you were knighted. You’ve made yourself busier than an old senator.”

You refuted his words, retorted that he was the constantly unreachable shadow, wandering between planetary systems and moody pre-teens. How often you went and knock on his door any time you were on leave only to be met with a locked door silently mocking you. He said that more often than not, he would meet the same fate (it’s true) and would try to fill his absence with little souvenirs he brought you back from his various destinations (it’s also true), leaving them under your doormat. You chastised him about it, complaining about that time he deemed wise to leave a bar of sweet-smelling treat in that specific spot, knowing damn well that colder days were approaching and the Temple had a floor heating system. By the time you had come back to your quarters, the bar was but molten goo and host to flowery mycelium. You complained about the mess it was to scrub and intentionally omitted to mention the blue box you kept under your bed, home to pressed flowers, amulets and other trinkets he has gotten you – you’ve kept every single one of them (expect the bar, which found its way straight to the waste bag).

Bowls were emptied, cleaned and stored away (Obi-Wan insisted on doing the dishes), and you both returned your focus to preparing the mission. Two travel bags and a satchel were waiting in your shared sleeping quarters. Digging through your belongings, you felt slightly anxious at the lack of neutral-coloured clothing and were met only with luxurious, expensive looking fabric with colours that would fit into any rainbow. You took out and set aside a long emerald dress and the heavy brown cloak, deeming them to be a believable travel attire to change into before landing.

Obi-Wan dug out datapads and a sealed, square box from the satchel. He gave you your datapad, which you supposed contained more details about the mission, and eyed the box curiously, turning it between his fingers, examining the object to find its opening mechanism. Finally, twisting the top part from the bottom of the box revealed its content; two rings and two identical pins.

“Ah, right. Married and crime lords” he stated matter-of-factly. He passed you one of the pins; it was golden and represented a wild bird, wings spread and embedded with precious gem stone. You supposed it represented the sigil of your imaginary crime syndicate, operating from the deep underworld of Coruscant, coordinating heavy weaponry and oil trafficking. Your cheeks blushed a little when you realized the rings where, in fact, wedding bands, and Obi-Wan has already slipped his on his finger, holding yours between his thumb and index. His other hand was extended “May I, milady?”

Your head jerked up to meet his cerulean eyes, a playful glint in their corners. You put the tip of your fingers in his calloused member. “I hope you have asked for my parents’ permission before so bluntly asking for my hand, sir.” He winked, running his hand through his hair to push back the growing locks. “I am afraid we are eloping, love.” Sliding the band onto your ring finger, the cold metal feeling foreign there, he added: “My dear wife.”

Somehow, your heart jostled a bit upon hearing his words and you smiled shyly. “Husband.”

Obi-Wan decided to meditate for a few moments before arrival. You offered he use the sleeping quarters for peace, as you wanted to go over the mission’s detail one last time in the cockpit. You must have dozed off reading about inter-rim smuggling routes because when you woke up, you were still curled in the pilot’s seat, a blanket you later recognized as Obi-Wan cloak draped over you.

…………………………………………………………………………………………

The outer-rim planet hosting your mission’s location was filled with luscious flora and where no greeneries grew, cities spread outwards rather than upwards, reminding you of a deceptive replica of Naboo. You landed in the royal spaceport, along with other foreign ships surely belonging to other “buyers” invited to the king’s exposition. Immediately upon setting foot on land, Obi-Wan’s hand found its way to the small of your back, then around, finally settling on your hip. So it begins, you thought. He met your eyes with a reassuring smile, giving you the confidence you needed to kick start your brain into immersing yourself in this new persona. You awkwardly leaned into his touch as the palace’s servant gathered your belonging, leading you to meet the group of newly arrived guest to the main palace, on the city’s rim, where you were all dispatched to your assigned quarters.

“His Majesty and his court expect all guests for a welcome dinner after sunset. He will be opening the exposition.” You were told when the servant opened the door to your room before handing Obi-Wan the keys.

The room, as could be expected in such milieu, was large, but decorations remained modest. Obi-Wan was already checking every corners of the room for anything suspicious when you were still taking in the beauty of the quarters. A thick deep orange carpet covered the dark wooden floor. A large mirror adorned a wall, reaching all the way up to the ceiling, reflecting the more-than-two-person canopy bed and its white veiled curtains. In a corner, a dining table and four chairs, in the other, a curved loveseat with white pillows. Another long plush couch was pushed again the wall under the window, next to the mirror, which offered an exclusive view on the forest surrounding the palace.

“Don’t even think of offering to sleep on it. I will not put up with you complaining about a sore back every morning”

“Actually, since I am quite larger than you, I thought I might be taking the bed – and you get this marvelous couch.”

You threw a pillow at him, and missed. “I do hope your fighting skills are better than your throws!” He set his bag down on the bed, claiming his side, his hand again in his hair, and your stomach sank a little at the realization that yes - you will really be sharing a bed, and it sank a little more when you couldn’t understand why it made you feel warm and shivering at the same time.

“If you steal the duvet, I will put my cold feet on you. Consider yourself warned, Kenobi.”

“Don’t worry darling, your body temperature is safe with me. Now let’s go for a walk, assess the surroundings. We have a few hours before the sunset.”

And then the sun set, and you had to get ready for dinner. You excused yourself to the fresher first, taking your bag, Fumbling again through the coloured fabrics with the same anxiety, you pulled out what you deemed to be the least ostentatious outfit offered – a loose satin grey dress, with straps so thin you were afraid they would snap at the first sudden arm movement, but at least it was long enough to cover the rest of your body. You put it on and stood awkwardly in front of the mirror, your eyes failing to recognize the reflection starring back. You did not like it – you were too uncovered, to bare, to exposed. This was unlike anything you ever wear daily, and the smooth fabric sliding on your skin felt too foreign for you to be comfortable. Turning around, you grimaced at how low the back was, now confronted with a literally visible underwear problem and decided against wearing one, cursing at the impracticality of formal attires. At least the cleavage offered more coverage. You keep most your hair down, still overly conscious about your bare shoulders, only twisting the strands that would frame your face behind your ears and securing them with crystal-decorated pins. And then you stepped out of the fresher.

And then Obi-Wan thought he died a sudden death and an angel has come to reap him. His mind wandered back to stories Anakin always rambled about beautiful being inhabiting the deepest corners of the galaxy and how they just seem to float in an aura than made them glow and he thought – this is it. This is his end, and you were his angel. And then only this last par was true, because angels aren’t reals but you were both real and ethereal and this was everything but his end, if anything it was the beginning of something he wasn’t quite understanding yet. He’s seen you before, but how has he never noticed you? You, the strong warrior he was practically raised with, now glowing in your silver gown, hiding glittering stars in your locks? If angels resided in the deepest corners of the galaxy, then he’s now found you a home in the deepest corners of his mind, and he knew he won’t be chasing you from there anytime soon – if ever.

You swore you saw Obi-Wan… blush? But before you could give it any second thought, his hand was holding yours and his lips were delicately pressed to your fingers and his bright irises searching for your eyes. Now it was your turn to blush. His other hand then scrabbled for something in his pocket, reaching for the golden pin with the wild bird and he once again whispered “may I?” before clipping in to the your dress, where the thin strap met the bodice.

“Is this all too much? It feels very inappropriate on me.”

“It’s beautiful.”

You wished he had said “you” instead of “it” but you gave him a smile and took his arm as you heard a knock on the door - the messenger servant sent to lead you to the dinner hall. You slip him your lightsaber, easier to hide under is loose clothes than your elegant dress. He opted for brown trousers and a deep purple linen shirt that he did not button all the way up. You silently admired your partner’s ability to just fit in anywhere, his posture straighter and more confident than usual (if it was at all possible), and his hold on you firm as he lead you sternly behind the servant. The jedi he is was well hidden under this new demeanor, and you did your best to mirror his expression, worried that you’d make your couple look underwhelming.

“Darling, I believe we have not talked about boundaries yet. The veracity of our act inevitably requires displays of affection, which I trust we both understand. But you must let me know if I ever overstep, as I may not keep my hands off you tonight.”

You nodded in agreement, very aware of the fact that he basically said he will be touching you – quite a lot. You were led through sun colored corridors, large windows illuminating your surroundings with the last rays of the dying day. Your arm still around Obi-Wan’s, you followed the servant out of the residential building, crossed a lush court surrounded by gardens and fountains and flowers smelling of power and credits into the main building. On your previous reconnaissance walk, you had noticed the exotic architecture, vaulted arches and high ceilings, pillars forming straight lines occasionally broken by mural ornaments. Everything was open, spacious and bright, but like your room, the decorations remained simple yet refined. Mouldings ornated each corner of the ceiling and the floor was a mosaic of orange-toned tiles. You passed by an atrium, open to the sky and home to yet another fountain. High class for an outer-rim world.

The dining hall followed the consistent décor of the palace. High ceilings and their mouldings and oh, – the whole ceiling itself was one big mirror. Three large tables were set, arranged in an open square formation. The atmosphere was already lively, and you were surprised at the number of people assisting to his exposition. No matter how hard the Republic claimed to fight against slavery, it remained a very much widespread practice in which too many lords seem to indulge. Another the thing that hit you – the women. You immediately noticed the contrast between the guests and the locals. The former wore similar attire as you, expensive evening gowns cut in noble materials (you winced internally as you realized that your outfit was indeed underwhelming in comparison), and the latter were covered head to toe in colourful fabric, long dresses trailing behind them, hair hidden under an assorted scarf. The different shape of their silhouettes betraying their diverse origins. They sat aligned at the table in the middle, two empty spots at its center, talking only to each other. The harem.

No other chairs were arranged, it will not be a seated dinner for the guests. You both approached the table on the left and when all guests have arrived and settled around the dinning arrangement, an old Zygerrian announced the king and his First Wife. Enter a tall, slim man wearing a long navy robe and a small, round, severe looking women. She was wearing a similar attire has the other wives, but the colour matched that of the king. He started his speech, something about lineage-long tradition of exploring and harvesting innocent youth across the galaxy to serve the best of the men and women. How he has mastered the art of finding only the best, most beautiful and promising beings and how excited he was to show them, how he will have them “parade” with his wives as dinner progresses, so each guests can get acquainted and take the time to choose their preferred match. Sales would be finalized at the end of the week and you wondered how choosing a slave could take so many rotations. You finally decided to pay a little less attention to the words and a little bit more to the people, your eyes scanning through the crowd for any interesting face, carefully probing them with the Force. You felt a little sick at the dangerous energy that emanated from the group. Malice. Greed. A little bit of fear?

You reluctantly left Obi-Wan to get you both drinks once the king finished his oration, glass raised and inviting the festivities to start. The reality of this mission sank in when hooded figures, too small to fit in, too young to be here, were brought in to the wives. All except the First Wife were assigned a figure and you noticed how each pair seemed to be of the same species. Guests immediately found their way to the drinks and sustenance before approaching the colourful covered pair closest to them. The man would always examine the subject as the women immediately started talking to the wife, and you understood your purpose in the mission. You could not shake away the nausea slowly building up in your stomach as you strayed through the crowd, eavesdropping on bribes of conversation, glancing each time a buyer your lift the hood off a little figure, revealing little boys and girls, face too round, eyes too wide, soul too pure to be put in this situation. Trying not to overthink their origin and breathing your distress out, you were making your way back to your fellow Jedi, two ruby wine glasses in your hand when:

“I am surprised someone in your youth would already be looking for another toy. Aren’t they too young for you?”

You turned around and were met with a handsome man, visibly an unaccompanied guest. You did not fully understand the meaning of his words, but you observed he was roughly your age.

“I am not quite sure what you mean sir, but I suppose I could address the same question back to you?”

“A man never has too many toys”.

The way he said it, his tone, sent a shiver down your spine and you crossed your arm to hide the goose bumps you could feel rising your hairs there. He flashed you a smile, all teeth and undeniably, dangerously charming, and you smiled back curtly, every fiber of your being screaming at you to turn around and cut the conversation short. You were starting to get an idea of what was really going on at this auction and you did not like it one bit.

“However do you mean by that?”

He stepped closer to you, taking one of the wine glasses from your hand, shamelessly taking a long sip of it. You straighten your posture, refusing to break his stare with a blink. Against your better judgement you readjusted a stand of hair behind your ear, bringing your own glass to your lips.

“Look around, my dear. We are about two decades younger than most buyers here, surely we must be seeking different things from them.”

“And what is it that you seek?”

Another sip of wine. His eyes bore into yours.

“Pretty things.”

And before you could answer, Obi-Wan has found you, his hand back to its place again on the small of your back. He was followed by by a pair of Togrutas, a veiled wife wearing light blue garments, her hand on the shoulder of a little Togruta girl, dressed in similar colours, eyes fixed on the floor.

“There you are my love. I need you to officiate my study of this young girl.” Then, turning to the lad beside you, “I don’t believe we’ve met?”

You all introduced yourself, and Obi-Wan stiffened when Perry, from Cantonica, bowed and managed to brush his lips against your knuckles, holding your hand a second too long to his liking. He reinforced his grip on you. You were already too close to him when he spotted you, and he did not miss the way Perry’s eyes crudely wandered over your figure. He nudged you towards the waiting Togruta pair, and you began asking questions you believed slavers would ask – her age, her health, strengths and weaknesses. The wife answered patiently answered, her eyes never leaving your face and her hand never leaving the girl. From the corner of your eyes, you saw Obi-Wan kneeling down in front of the girl and his hand moved to examine her limbs and montrals. To an outsider, he would seem like a natural, but you saw has his touch was firm but gentle, and how he seemed to softly ask permission to the little girl before moving to another body part. Obi-Wan’s heart broke a little when she only nodded in agreement, her lifeless eyes never leaving the floor. Perry was still observing you in silence, his eyes curiously darting between Obi-Wan and you. Finally, he released the little girl and you thanked her matrona.

“I see you are unaccompanied. Given the situation, I will be happy to lead an interaction in your name.”

“I will be happy to just join you in your meetings, if you’ll allow me.”

You seeked Obi-Wan’s eyes for approval and he nodded. The evening continued like this for a while, the three of you alternating between the buffet and meeting other younglings, some more talkative than others, and you mediating the interactions, repeating the question the men were asking directly to the matrona, who would only answer to you. Perry seemed to take a particular interest in two of the older ones (you tried not to gag), and Obi-Wan chose a little Twi’lek as fake target. You noted that the little boy reminded you of Anakin. Some of the kids surely originated from the core planets, noticing a Pantoran, and you wondered how the king managed to have such a broad diversity. Not that you’d know much about slave trade, but you were still surprised. By the time the event drew to its end, both your mind and body were exhausted, and when Perry tried to drag Obi-Wan into a private game of Sabacc in the king’s quarters, you nudged him to go (for more information, you whispered softly). Perry noticed how you hastly took your leave, excusing yourself for the evening.

“Do you not kiss your wife goodnight, Kenobi?”

Obi-Wan’s eyes met yours, unsure what to do, trying to fight the urge to just slam his lips against yours and giving in to the temptation to explore your skin, drawing constellations along the trail of his mouth on your neck, but not daring to without consulting you.

“Only in the privacy of our room.”

He still pulled you close on last time and his lips brushed your temple, inhaling your sweet scent. You tried to ignore your disappointment. He didn’t want to let you go alone, and there was no way he could discretely slip your lightsaber back to you. But you were a resourceful women and he trusted you to make it back to the room without incident. As you left the main building, you spotted a group of the wives discussing around the fountain, seemingly more relaxed and joyful than they were in the dining hall. Their conversation died and a stern look settled on their faces as you approached, asking if you could join them. With a little use of the force to sooth any distrust, you managed to ease into their discussions, hoping that the wine that flowed this evening would loosen tongues and appease suspicions.

…………………………………………………………………………………………

Your mind was wandering on the sharp edge between awake and asleep when Obi-Wan came back to your room, tiptoeing his way across the entrance. You had let his bedside lamp dimly lit for him, and you observed quietly as he removed his shirt, his bare chest and their red hair and taut muscle on full display for you. Has he noticed you were awake? You felt guilty for prying, like you were witnessing something deliciously illicit, but the way his skin seemed to gleam under the dim warm light, shadows only enhancing his features, how he look strong yet tired and vulnerable had something too mesmerizing for you to tear your eyes away.

Of course he had noticed you weren’t sleeping, but he wasn’t going to let you feel embarrassed for starring. Besides, he couldn’t resist putting on a little show, one last treat to end this tedious day before slumping next to you. But as he was pulling his shirt above his head, he suddenly felt self-conscious about his nakedness, and decided to quietly disappear into the fresher. You were right, joining the Sabacc tournament gained him access to exclusive information, some he could easily pull out from drunken lords, gladly taking hints he was dropping to steer the conversation the way he wanted to. He had so much to discuss with you, but for now he had to focus on getting the smell of spirit off his scent and getting himself into bed with you. That last part was making him more anxious than having to face a tantrum-throwing Anakin, and despite the late hour, he opted for a quick shower.

Clean and absolutely worn out, he silently slid under the duvet next to you, careful not to wake you up. You were really sleeping now, your back facing the edge of the bed, your breathing soft and steady. He took one last look at you before turning the light off, how your lips were slightly parted and pouty, and your chest rising and falling in a peaceful rhythm. How your hair framed your beautiful face, and he chastised himself once more for not looking at you earlier, for taking so many years to realize what he had just here, right in front of him, and how he didn’t know what to do with it. It – the fuzzy feeling in his stomach that did not seem to settle since you landed but only to grow in intensity as he could not peel his eyes off you the whole evening. And when he fully put his weight down on the mattress, you shifted a little bit closer to him, your warm radiating under the blanket and he thought he might suffocate when he noticed how small the straps of your nightdress where, and he couldn’t help but wonder how soft you must feel if he were to hold you, but then your leg brushed his and he scooted just a millimeter more against you.

“Good night, little one.”

…………………………………………………………………………………………

It was in a silent mutual agreement that you both ignored the fact that when you woke up this morning, your legs were tangled together, his arm somehow found their way across your middle, your head resting in the crook of his neck, and he stole an innocent kiss from on your forehead when you were still weary. It was in a silent understanding that when you got dressed and went down for breakfast, the hands you held with each other was nothing but another façade, another prop to the act you play. At least, that’s what you both tried to convince yourselves with. That was why the overall you chose this morning was a little bolder, red, mind you, and the cut twice as deep, this time both in the back and the front. The visible underwear problem remained and at this point you gave up on wearing any. The bodice hugged your curves in all the right places (he tried very hard not to stare), the wide bottom pants flowing around your legs despite the thicker material. On the practical side, it had pockets, and the looseness of the pants allowed you to strap your lightsaber to your inner thigh. That was also why, like yesterday, Obi-Wan secured the pin to your strap, his fingers lingering a moment longer on your collarbone, a subtle caress to the skin above your breast.

“It’s the wives” you say later, your voice low, briefing him on your findings from the previous night while munching on some local fruit. “Did you notice how they are all from different worlds?”

“The king steals them from their home. People he deals in business with, or poorer, farther-rim systems. He offers protection to whoever is the sovereign there. In return, they have to give up their first daughter as wife, or son as slave – I don’t know what is worse. And they have to send two child here each year, a boy and a girl, elected by their people as the most beautiful.”

“I can’t believe such an elite slave trade exists with such young ones. The younglings are to be auctioned. It starts tonight. You can already place your bid with the respective matrona. Most buyers are from the core planets too.”

“They must hold a record somewhere.”

“The First Wife. She coordinates everything. She should have an office. And Obi-Wan, we might want to sneak a matrona back to Coruscant as witness – not all of them want to be here nor agree with this. Stars, Anakin would hate this place.”

He nodded approvingly, his look shutting you up as Perry appeared in your line of sight with the First Wife. She greeted the both of you, saying she insisted on meeting each customer personally, asking about if you’ve already spotted any preferred candidate, and what kind of leverage you were interested to offer up as deposit to secure a higher chance of acquiring them. You kept your answers short, ignoring Perry’s eyes on you, mentioning the young twi’lek, and a shipment of unrefined oil and spice, lying perfectly when needed and sticking to the cover story the Council had prepared. But then:

“I couldn’t help but overhear – who his this dear Anakin?”

You felt Obi-Wan tight tense up under where your hand was. You sent him a reassuring nudge through the force, putting on your most tender smile and said:

“Our son, your Majesty. He is ten.”

“Ah, then you might be interested in our little Saya. She’s a bit younger, human, but it’s good to have them match a younger age. Makes them more malleable, you know? I will have her matrona and her meet you tonight.”

You thanked her politely, saying you will need to discuss the matter with your husband first but appreciate the gesture. She updated you both on the activities the king has had organized for the guests; a visit of the baths for the females, a hunting game for the males, and left, moving on to the next table. Obi-Wan was admiring your quick wit, growling after Perry’s insistent gaze on you, at the fact you will again be separated, and you were still processing the interaction.

“Brides,” you whispered in horror. “They’re selling the girls as child bride, Obi-Wan.”

His hand squeezed yours in understanding, and you both decided to head back to your room to discuss your next plan of action – getting evidence. Tonight.

…………………………………………………………………………………………

When you got back to your room after hours dipping in various bath waters, Obi-Wan had scrambled a note that they had come back early from the hunt and already had to join the dinner party. You took yet another shower today – who could have thought so many different baths existed? Mud, sea salt, ocean salt, dead salt (whatever that was). This night, you opted for a an exquisite chiffon blue dress (his favourite colour), again with an open back (you both secretly enjoyed when his fingers absentmindedly caressed your skin there) with a slit high on your leg (but not high enough to reveal your saber) and your hair tied in a high bun (maybe his fingers will wander to your neck too) and when you left your room that evening feeling like a million credit, you arrived at the window where we was waiting for you in the hall just in time to catch the sunset.

“It’s beautiful.” You said as you reached his side.

And despite the horrific truth behind the mission, and the exhausting day he just had putting up with the other crime lords talking about the slaves like lifeless objects, he thought you must have been bathing in the very same sunset because when he replied with “yes, beautiful” it was you and not the window he was looking at. His knuckles again found their home on the skin on your back (you screamed a little inside) and you could feel his chest pressed into your side, his warmth welcomed on your bare flesh. And then his breath against the back of your ear, the ghost of his lips barely brushing against your pulse.

“I like it.”

“What?”

“Your beard. I wasn’t sure before, but I’ve decided I like it.”

“Oh. Anything else you’ve decided to like about my body in my absence? Perhaps I could give you a tour?”

“Obi-Wan,” you gasped, amused. “Are you flirting with me?”

A light chuckle escaped his lips before they found their way to the soft skin behind your ear again. “Perhaps.” His voice was sweet, teasing. “What kind of husband would I be if I did not woo my beloved wife every now and then?” His lips dipped lower to the crook of your neck and pressed a chaste kiss there, his stubble deliciously burning your skin. You turned around, hiding your shiver. His impossibly deep cerulean eyes were smiling at you, and you swore you saw them trail down your cleavage first and you rolled your eyes at him behind your lashes. His cheeks were flushed, a smug smile spread across his face. You really wanted to feel those lips on your too, now. Thinking of something to do to break this tension that surely you weren’t the only one feeling, your hands went to readjust the collar of his tunic.

“While I do highly enjoy this, I need you focused, Kenobi.”

“Given how little I can do without your presence with the wives, and the drinks I was peer pressured into drinking, I might let you take the lead tonight.”

You made a point to tease him about it the whole evening when guests were called, and like last night, the matronas were already aligned with their protégés. Unlike last night, the atmosphere was tense, and you could already see quarrels rising when two buyers started bidding wars for a same subject. You refused the drinks the servants were offering (one of us has to stay sober, you said with a wink) and led Obi-Wan to the little twi’lek from yesterday. Speeches were made, more bid placed, food served, live music played and peoples have started dancing when Obi-Wan excused himself to the fresher (your skin burned where his had was resting this whole time). Perry approached you.

“Will the lovely lady grant me this dance?”

With no valid reason to excuse yourself, you had to accept. Immediately, his hand was too low on your back and his grip on your hand too tight, his breath smelling heavily of spirit. “Your husband is very protective of you”. You did not like the way he whispered into your ear; too close, too wet. “Would not agree to share you – and I’ve never heard prices go this high.” You tried to pull away a little, but he only pulled you closer, his hand now even lower. “Did he tell you I killed the largest game today, hm? I shall deserve a prize for this, don’t you think, pretty thing?”

You were about to get back to him, ready use some force to get out of his grip if you must.

“That’s enough.”

Obi-Wan was back between the two of you, jaw clenched and eyes dark, his voice deep and threatening. You took advantage of this distraction to untangle yourself from your unwanted dance partner, who gave you both a polite nod, an irritating smirk never leaving his face before leaving.

“Are you alright little one?” His hands were cupping your face, thumbs tracing circles on your cheeks. You closed your eyes, leaning into his touch.

“Drunken men and their wandering hands aren’t enough to upset me, Obi-Wan.”

“My brave girl.”

He pressed his lips to your forehead, pulling you closer to him. Your heart skipped a beat at the praise.

“What’s the trouble?”

“These men –“ he looked around, “tried to bid to have you, all day. Perry was the most insistent.”

“And?”

“No one will lay a hand on your as long you are mi- you are with me”.

He wanted to say mine. “You are mine”. Because you were, and you knew it, but he would not dare to call you as such yet. You said nothing and placed one hand on his shoulder, taking his hand in the other. He picked up on your unspoken requests, balancing his weight on his legs, and soon your head was resting on his chest as he tried to clumsily lead you to the rhythm of the music, trying to follow a melody neither of you knew. He may have stepped on your feet once or twice, but you didn’t mind. You looked up to his face and his gaze was already on yours, and your hand went from his shoulder to the back of his head, pushing it down to your neck because you couldn’t stand him looking at you like that without your stomach doings somersaults.

You looked up to the ceiling, the large mirror reflecting the dining hall, a whirlwind of people and tints and tones tangled together, mixed into an incoherent splatter of colours that made you dizzy. You tried to spot your own reflection, wondering what you’d look like in his arms, but you couldn’t make out a single face in the mist of the dancing crowd.

What you did spot, however, was the First Wife, her bright golden reflection standing out from the crowd, slightly apart. And then it clicked, and you were back in the present moment. The mission. The girls. The records. You whispered in his ear, your voice tinted with urgency.

“She spies on people. The mirror. We can’t wait until the end like we planned. We must slip away while the room is still full, it will make it harder to spot us.”

He agreed silently, and with a few more steps and twists and turns, gradually led you through the mass of dancers, towards to back door, and when you were far enough, you waited for that beat, that moment to sneak out of the dining hall in silence. Obi-Wan produced a computer system key from his pocket and lead you through corridors and stairs. “I spied on her when we got back earlier. Her quarters are above the halls,” he explained. And that where you went. You hoped his inebriety has lowered and kept your senses in alert as you arrived in a pink clay corridor, in front of a large wooden door. You trusted Obi-Wan that this was the right place, and when you found the control panel, he gave you the system key. You were fast enough, and with a little bit of guidance from the Force, managed to unlock the door.

“Be quick,” you whispered, and he slipped into the office, leaving you to guard the passage.

And he was quick, reappearing with a triumphant smile, slipping what appeared to be a holochip under his tunic. You proceeded to attempt to close the door, only for it to get stuck half way. To make matter worse, you could hear footsteps coming down the corridor, approaching at a steady pace. Calling on the Force to keep you grounded, you focused on the key turning in the panel, aware of all the notches position it went through. Then the door closed and locked, just as the footsteps were reaching you, a flash of golden yellow hinting something bad, and before you could think, you grabbed Obi-Wan’s hand and pulled him to you, pressing your back to the wall, your dress covering the still open control panel.

“What are you doing?”

“Covering us.”

You put your arms around his neck and pulled him for a kiss. He didn’t react at first, slightly dumbfounded and taken aback, but once he caught up to your thinking he snaked his arms around your waist and pressed himself further against you. His lips responded to your, engaging them in a silent conversation that only grew more heated at you heard the footstep stop. Your heart must have also stopped too, and you weren’t breathing anymore, too aware of the pair of eyes on the two of you, too excited by the tongue that was now requesting entrance to your mouth, and you granted. Conversations turned into a dance, tongues trying to dominate the other, teeth grazing and nipping at lips. You closed your eyes, this was all too much. And then he moved down to your neck, his tongue laving at the skin there, tracing kisses into a pattern down to your shoulder. You felt his hand reach behind you, down your leg, his body following his movement and his lips now nipping at the side of your arm. A slight tug on your dress, and he was reaching back up, his hand now dipping beneath the slip of your dress, pulling your leg to hook it around hip. His fingers kneaded the skin on your inner tight, and you gasped at his audacity, but when you felt something cold pressed again your skin, you realized he had removed the computer system key and secured it to your strap, next to your lightsaber.

You heard the footsteps again, their echo a diminuendo as they departed. And Obi-Wan heard it to, but he did nothing to pull away, and you did nothing either. Instead, his ministrations toned down, growing softer, turning into tender nipping at your jaw, timid kisses on each corners of your lips. You slowly withdrew your leg from his side and he sighed at the absence of contact. You kept your eyes shut, knowing that if you were to open them, the blue gaze that would meet you will be your end. So you waited until he relaxed his grip on your waste, his teeth grazing your skin one last time, and there was nothing left of the two jedi on a mission but panting bodies and hungry stares and cheeks flushed with blood and intertwined fingers. Then a scary thought crossed your mind – this meant nothing, this was just a cover, and you turned your face away, gently pushing him back. He released you, trying to regain his composure. You kicked the door of the control panel closed, and when you looked back at him, nothing on his face betrayed the events that just transpired – not even wet lips. He was all serious eyes and stern face, and you both agreed to head back to your quarters to contact the Council immediately.

…………………………………………………………………………………………

The holo-records Obi-Wan stole were sent via a secure pulse transmission to the council, which revealed that numerous high placed personalities from Republic planets were involved in this slave ring. The Senate thus took the matter in their hands, deciding to send their law reinforcement for arrests before the sales would be concluded at the end of the week. Obi-Wan and you were to leave the premises before things got dirtier, and a few standard hours later, you were both back in your Jedi robes, all lavish make-up and attire stored away in their original travel bag, like a circus would fold up its tent after a show. You stayed silent as Obi-Wan typed in the coordinated back to Coruscant, drawing your legs up to your chin in the co-pilot’s chair.

You turned the wedding band around your finger, the last piece of your costume you had not gotten yourself to remove yet, thoughts wandering around the symbolism and the implications that came with such a small piece of metal. Obi-Wan sensed your inner turmoil and, the autopilot engaged, turned his chair to face you, taking your hands in his.

“What is it, love?”

“The band. It is strange to think that two people fall in love, and the whole foundation of their trust, their intimacy, everything they share is held like a promise on one finger, and taking this away means taking everything away.”

“Very much like us, our lightsabers and the Order. It is but another token to a lifetime commitment.”

“We commit to a code, to a place, a lifestyle and the Force. But do we ever really commit to anyone? I feel like a fraud wearing it.”

He gave you a strange look, and you hoped he understood that you were not questioning your allegiance to the Order. Just where my heart belongs, you thought. He stayed silent, his fingers playing with said band, turning it around your finger. You couldn’t tell where this was coming from, thinking that your emotional ramble was no longer valid now that the mission was over and he would not understand why you suddenly felt so empty – because it means going back to being Jedi, and not unlawfully wed husband and wife. But then he pressed both your hands to his forehead, bending in front of you like he did that time he was crying over his fears in your room.

“Please don’t ever think what happened on that planet was meaningless. There is no one else in the galaxy with whom I would have wanted to indulge in this experience but you, and I would like to do it for as long as you’ll have me. If you’ll have me.”

Your heart skipped a beat, and your thoughts had not caught up with your words when you blurted out:

“I want you Obi-Wan. Always.”

You pulled him up to you. His lips met yours again, and this time you knew it was real. It was soft at first, as if he never kissed you before, lips exploring lips and when he familiarized himself with the map of your curves and corners, his teeth nipped at your bottom lip, his tongue seeking yours. You opened your mouth to him, and he pulled you up, pressing your body into his and you melted a little as you became one with him. His arms wrapped you in a tight embrace and your hands found their way around his neck, in his hair, tugging the lock affectionately. He hummed in content, you sighed in relief.

You knew this could – would – mean long discussions about your values, the conflicting dichotomy between listening to your feelings but not indulging in them, that it would mean more secrets, stolen glances and forbidden touches, another perception of the time and space between you and him, parsecs and moons away from each other during missions. You smiled against his lips as you thought about how things always come in pairs; light and dark, moons and suns, seas and skies, days and night, and how maybe, you and him could be the two counterparts of your own binary system.

[padme-amitabha]

Is Anakin a Mary Sue?

Now it may shock you to learn this but it turns out that Disney Star Wars is kind of a contentious topic. The fandom's been more or less divided between those who like the sequel trilogy and those who like good movies but both groups spend a great deal of time slinging [ __ ] at each other over every form of social media known to man and truly no battleground is more fiercely contested than the protagonist of each trilogy. People who hate the Disney trilogy tend to criticize Rey for being an overpowered, flawless, perfect, invincible and unrelatable character for whom everything just kind of happens with no real struggle or difficulty a Mary Sue if you will.

Meanwhile supporters of the sequel trilogy are quick to leap to her defense usually with one of two potential counter arguments:  1. You just hate strong women 2. So what if she's op as [ __ ] Anakin Skywalker from the prequels was a Mary Sue too and you don't criticize him. You just hate strong women. This argument was brought into sharp focus for me the other day when I was perusing twitter in search of calm, logical, rational discussion about the merits of the sequel trilogy and I chanced upon this little gem of a comment. Ah yes that famously perfect protagonist who wins everything, always makes the right decisions, has a selfless and compassionate personality, and is universally loved and respected by everyone. Well random twitter [ __ ] as it turns out, I am ready to have that conversation right now. So saddle up y'all because the drinker's here to round up this [ __ ] and put an end to this argument once and for all. Let us journey deep into the world of the Star Wars prequels and see if we can figure out whether Anakin Skywalker really is a Mary Sue.

Now in order to do this, we have to nail down what exactly a Mary Sue is. Well according to the dictionary definition it's a term used to describe a fictional character, usually female, who is seen as too perfect and almost boring for lack of flaws originally written as an idealized version of an author in fanfiction. Now the finer points of what makes a Mary Sue can vary depending on who you talk to but after consulting multiple sources and drawing upon my own experiences as a writer, there's a few common traits that I think most people would generally agree on:

1.      Mary Sues usually possess skills and abilities that are not consistent with their situation and personal history. They can do stuff they shouldn't realistically be able to and they can do it better than anyone else.

2.      They usually possess flawless idealized personalities that no real person could measure up to they never give in to negative emotions like anger, greed, jealousy, selfishness or arrogance.

3.      They're universally loved respected and embraced by every good character they encounter even when there's no logical reason for this to happen.

4.      They never get seriously challenged, fail at anything or get beaten by anyone, success and victory come easily to them.

5.      They always make good decisions and strive to do what's right in any situation so why is this actually a problem.

Well I think the answer should be obvious, Mary Sues are boring as [ __ ]. If a character has got no flaws or weaknesses and never really gets challenged or tested by anything then what is there to get invested in?

It's the flaws and failings of a character that make them interesting in the first place and their struggle to rise above and overcome these flaws that make them so compelling. If these things are missing from a character, then there's nothing for the audience to latch onto or care about. There's nothing to like or root for. That's the essence of a Mary Sue and that's what we're going to be looking at here. So, with that in mind let's see how Anakin stacks up against this list shall we?

Point number one: Being overpowered and having abilities that he shouldn't. Now this more than anything else is what people tend to latch onto when they criticize Anakin and who can blame them really? On the surface it seems pretty ridiculous to see a nine-year-old boy doing stuff like this autopilot but let's put it into a wider context, shall we? When we first meet Anakin in The Phantom Menace, he's a slave living with his mother on Tatooine. He's spent most of his life salvaging junk and using it to make new stuff that can marginally improve their quality of life. As a result, he's become pretty good with technology. Well that makes sense, I guess. He's even applied these technical skills to pod racing where he's been fairly successful despite suffering at least one major crash that we know about. Again, this kind of makes sense when you consider he's strong with the force which would likely give him heightened perception reactions and understanding of the world around him, you know qualities that are important to high performance racing drivers. Anyway, his racing abilities allow the main characters to win an engine part that they need to repair their ship as well as enough money to buy his freedom. Sensing his importance Qui-Gon Jinn takes him under his wing and begins to teach him about the force. Remember when older mentor characters were allowed to teach the protagonist things? I miss that. He also takes part in a space battle that destroys an enemy mothership at the climax of the movie. Now as goofy as this scene is in its execution, it's not actually inconsistent with Anakin’s abilities and experiences. If you've worked around technology vehicles and ships your entire life and you can pilot a racing pod to a high standard then it stands to reason that you could probably operate other types of spacecraft as well, particularly if you have a droid on board to manage most of the ship's systems for you. However, for the sake of argument let's concede the Anakin in The Phantom Menace is indeed more skilled competent and capable than your average person.

So, what kind of effect would this have on a young man from an impoverished background suddenly thrust into a much larger world of power, politics and opportunity? Well that brings me neatly along to point number two: Mary Sues are supposed to have flawless personalities never giving in to anger, jealousy, resentment, vengeance or ambition. All throughout the second and third movies in the prequel trilogy, Anakin displays an increasingly severe set of personality flaws that begin to undermine his position in the world and his relationship with other characters. He's impetuous and hot-headed, frequently rushing into dangerous situations without waiting for backup or considering the risk to himself particularly when someone he cares about is in danger. Keep that one in mind because it'll be important later. He's ambitious but also impatient, feeling like he's been unfairly held back by other characters, particularly Obi-Wan Kenobi, and this resentment causes a growing rift between the two men that eventually spills out into open conflicts. Rather than taking the longer and harder path to wisdom and understanding, Anakin wants everything right away. He also cares deeply about people close to him and this attachment often manifests in explosive bites of anger and jealousy when he feels that they're being threatened like when his mother gets kidnapped and killed by Tusken Raiders, causing Anakin to go on a violent rampage that escalates into wholesale slaughter. Afterwards even he's shocked by what he did or when he believes that Padme has turned against him by Obi-Wan Kenobi, causing him to lash out violently against both of them. By this point he's been totally consumed by uncontrolled jealousy anger resentment and betrayal. All of the emotions that lead to the dark side of the force. The point here is clear: if you [ __ ] with someone he cares about then mercy and compassion go right out the window.

All of his skills, abilities and potential which seemed so overpowered and unnecessary in the first movie in fact serve a very important purpose for his character development. They've generated a sense of superiority, arrogance and overconfidence, and a reluctance to listen to criticism or advice no matter how well intentioned they might be. These are dangerous flaws in his personality all by themselves but combined with his overwhelming emotional attachment to people he cares about it creates a potent cocktail of reckless ambition and deep-seated insecurity that makes him uniquely vulnerable to manipulation something which will later prove disastrous because while Mary Sues are universally loved respected and trusted by everyone, Anakin certainly isn't in the first movie. Obi-Wan Kenobi, Mace Windu and Yoda are all against training Anakin to become a Jedi despite his obvious potential because they know he's already too old to be inducted. This lack of early discipline in his life would leave a dangerous gap in his personality, making him unpredictable and less able to control his emotions, two factors which are extremely dangerous for Jedi. These misgivings would carry over to the next two movies where Anakin is elevated to the Jedi high council on Palpatine’s orders but the council itself refuses to grant him the rank of master because they feel he hasn't earned it yet. Now a different man would see this as an opportunity to prove himself by working hard and earning their trust eventually winning them over and gaining the recognition he deserves but Anakin takes this as a personal insult from the council which drives a deeper wedge between him and a Jedi order which he believes will never truly respect or accept him. Wow it's almost like Palpatine knew this was going to happen and engineered the whole thing to pull Anakin closer to him portraying himself as the only one who can help Anakin realize his full potential. It's a surprisingly smart piece of characterization that's completely consistent with everything we know about both men. The higher Anakin rises the more it stokes the fire of his ambition and superiority and the more he comes to see anyone who doubts or cautions him as a threat to his success. This arrogance and overconfidence also causes him to test himself against powerful opponents before he's actually ready for them and unlike Mary sues who easily win every battle they have to fight, Anakin’s recklessness causes an escalating series of losses like here where he tries to take on count Dooku all by himself and it ends with Anakin getting his [ __ ] arm sliced off. But his desire for revenge against the man who defeated him ultimately causes a more powerful and better prepared Anakin to execute him in the following movie, again proving his willingness to give into vengeance and anger even against helpless opponents or here in his climactic confrontation with Obi-Wan where his enemy has the advantage but Anakin presses the attack anyway and well I think we know how that turns out. Just as a side note I love how this carries over to Return of the Jedi. See Luke’s taking the high ground here just like Obi-Wan did.

What we have here is a clear pattern of behavior from a man whose ambitions consistently outstrip his abilities. Rather than demonstrating patience and restraint and taking the slower and harder path to lasting wisdom and fulfillment, Anakin’s inherent character flaws cause him to push himself beyond breaking point with increasingly disastrous consequences which brings me neatly along to the final points: whereas Mary Sues consistently make good righteous decisions and always strive to do the correct thing, Anakin on the other hand demonstrates a consistent pattern of mistakes and misjudgments that ultimately cost him everything. As I've already shown you the flaws in his personality are exacerbated by his powers and abilities making him easy prey for a ruthlessly ambitious man that knows exactly how to flatter his ambitions and prey on his weaknesses this eventually causes him to commit terrible crimes like murdering an entire tribe including unarmed civilians murdering children, executing a helpless opponent, helping to kill a jedi master, trying to murder his own wife, trying to kill his mentor and best friend, joining forces with an evil dictator to overthrow the republic, delivering this scene…

What I’m trying to say with all this is that Anakin Skywalker is the very furthest thing from a Mary Sue that you can get. Trying to label him as a Mary Sue for no other reason than because he's good at lots of stuff demonstrates a complete misunderstanding of what a Mary Sue is and also of who Anakin is. The reality is that he's a powerful but deeply flawed man whose unique combination of circumstances and abilities have created a dangerous personality that's vulnerable to manipulation and corruption his greatest strengths ultimately proved to be his most terrible weaknesses with consequences that echo across the entire galaxy. Now I have my own thoughts on the prequel trilogy as a whole and I’d be lying if I said they were great movies but fundamentally I think the story they tell is actually pretty [ __ ] good and I’m just gonna say it: Anakin’s rise to power and fall to the dark side is a damn good piece of character work that Disney would have done well to pay more attention to. Anyway, that's all I’ve got for today. Go away now.

I would argue the prequels are great movies but he makes some very good points. I have seen so many Disney fans claim Anakin is a Mary Sue, when he’s anything but a Mary Sue. 

[stonefreeak]

Hello everyone! I hope you’re all doing alright in these times. If not, I hope that maybe this can at least be a bit of cheering up. Er... that I’m updating, I mean.

When Obi-Wan gets the comm message from Anakin, asking to meet, he immediately checks with Blast regarding his schedule. No doubt is Anakin upset regarding Palpatine's arrest and needs support.

Which, of course, Obi-Wan will take time out of his busy schedule for Anakin. Anything else would be unthinkable. 

He makes sure his schedule is freed up for the rest of the day and then he sends Anakin an affirmation. Obi-Wan would have prefered to have this conversation in the Temple, at home, but Anakin’s message was urgent enough that Obi-Wan doesn’t want to cause any unnecessary delays.

He can only imagine how hard this must be for Anakin, after all. He’s always looked up to and trusted Palpatine implicitly. Regardless of Obi-Wan’s feelings regarding Palpatine in particular, he knows it’s hard to have your trust betrayed.

When Anakin finally arrives in Obi-Wan's office, he's pale faced and the Force around him roils with anger and sadness.

Obi-Wan suppresses a wince at the uncomfortable feeling. Perhaps he can lead Anakin through some meditation to help him deal with it, but he cannot be sure. Anakin has always been rather private about his meditation, uncomfortable with doing it in front of others. Obi-Wan has always tried to be respectful of that, even when he's wanted to make sure that Anakin is managing well, but as Anakin’s grown older Obi-Wan has had to accept his independence and trust his words that his meditation goes well.

One of the hardest things for a teacher is learning to let go.

Until you do... you can never become a master. Learning to let your student go, letting them choose their own path, is an important step in becoming a Jedi Master. Only very rarely does anyone receive the title without having taken a Padawan for that exact reason. For most, the act of letting your Padawan go is the first time you’re ever truly faced with such a decision.

"Obi-Wan! Have you seen the news?" Anakin goes straight to the point, as always.

Obi-Wan smothers the smile that wants to break out on his face at his friend's predictability—he's well aware that it would not be well received right now.

"I have. Come, sit." Obi-Wan takes a seat on the sofa and pats the spot next to him. Anakin may want to pace, but Obi-Wan has always harboured the suspicion that rather than expend energy, it only makes Anakin twist himself into knots of increasing frustration and manic energy. If he can just help Anakin calm down, this conversation is no doubt going to go far better than otherwise.

“How are you, Anakin?” Obi-Wan knows that the answer may be quite obvious judging by how Anakin feels in the Force, like rolling thunder clouds spewing lightning everywhere, but he’d much rather ask than presume. Better to let Anakin use his own words—especially as he may not even be here to talk about this in particular.

“Angry. I’m… so angry.” Anakin’s face twists up in a snarl as he speaks, but he does take the offered seat, hands clenching in his trouser legs. 

Obi-Wan lays a careful hand on his shoulder, but says nothing. Best to let Anakin get his thoughts sorted out properly and verbally expressed before Obi-Wan gets involved.

“I can’t believe they’re going to pull Mr Palpatine in front of a jury on corruption charges. It’s ridiculous!”

Obi-Wan hides a wince at those words. It’s… not ridiculous. Not at all. But Anakin doesn’t know just how not-ridiculous it is, because Obi-Wan has not had the strength or courage to explain it to him yet.

He’s let his fears of Anakin’s reaction hold him back, but he’s simply not certain if Anakin is ready to hear it.

Anakin idolises Palpatine in a way that seems neither healthy nor… earned, really. It makes Obi-Wan uncomfortable, and in his attempts to not drive Anakin away, he’s tamped down on his own unease around Palpatine.

He’s always been very careful of how he speaks of Palpatine, and he wonders now if that has been a mistake. If he’d been more frank about his unease while Anakin was still a child…

The past cannot be changed, and Obi-Wan must live with and accept the choices he’s made. Perhaps being more frank about Palpatine—regardless of how uncertain Obi-Wan was in his position as Jedi Knight in comparison to the most powerful man in the Republic—would have helped give Anakin a clearer view of the man… But there’s no saying whether or not it wouldn’t have the opposite effect, and instead drive Anakin away from Obi-Wan and the Jedi.

Anakin has had his doubts, but he’s always come back to the path of the Jedi in the end. Obi-Wan wouldn’t have wanted to sow hurt and mistrust, doubt and shame, when it wasn’t necessary. So he’s been careful, especially as he’s never truly had the ability to stop Palpatine from gaining access to Anakin. There’s never been anything odd during the visits he’s supervised, and many of them happened while Obi-Wan was not even on Coruscant in the first place.

What has been, has been. What has been done, has been done. Obi-Wan has to live with it as it is now. And if the fallout is grave, then he must be prepared to deal with it.

“I’m sure the investigators have good reasons for what they’re doing,” he says gently, eyeing Anakin closely.

Anakin whose mouth drops open and whose face drains of blood.

“How can you say that?” Anakin snarls. “They’re pulling a man who’s given everything for the Republic, who put off his retirement from a high-stress and high-pressure position due to public support in front of a jury on made-up charges!”

Obi-Wan flinches back. Made-up? Why in all the Core Worlds does Anakin think that whatever charges that will be brought up against Palpatine are made up?

He flounders, uncertain how to voice his thoughts in a way that will not make Anakin angrier or even worse: defensive.

“I… Anakin. There are Jedi taking part in the investigation, they wouldn’t—” He’s not allowed to finish his sentence before Anakin cuts him off.

“Hah! They don’t trust politicians either, just like you and the Council, most likely. So if some other part of the investigation fakes evidence, they won’t question it! I’m sure of it.”

Obi-Wan stares at Anakin in horror. Where are these horrific thoughts coming from? Obi-Wan knows Anakin has always tended to keep himself separate from his peer group, and his close friends have always been few. But to actively distrust his community members to this point...?

How badly has Obi-Wan failed to help him integrate into the Jedi culture if he cannot imagine them taking their jobs seriously and working to look beyond their biases in a situation as critical as the investigation of the former Chancellor of the Galactic Republic…?

“You truly believe that your fellow Jedi would let their supposed biases blind them so completely that they wouldn’t be diligent in an investigation of this much importance? That they would allow for the investigation to proceed in bad faith?”

Anakin blinks, stops, and starts rubbing his forehead as if it’s hurting.

“Yes. No… I don’t… No. No, I don’t.” He sighs explosively and grips his hair with both hands. “I’m just frustrated, I suppose. I know Palpatine isn’t corrupt, and it just feels like they’re pulling him into court for something really small, or something made up.”

Obi-Wan sighs, partly in relief though his disquiet remains.

“For your sake, Anakin, I hope that there is nothing to find, that what I found was just coincidences.” However… Obi-Wan is almost entirely certain that it was not. There are just too many coincidences for it to seem real. The notes on the missions leading to the investigation into Jedi missions which has borne fruit, Obi-Wan’s findings that started the investigation into Mas Amedda and Palpatine which has led to so many arrests already.

Surely it cannot be a coincidence. All of it… it must be connected somehow. Somehow this all leads back to the Sith Lord, and Obi-Wan is becoming more certain that Palpatine is being manipulated by him. At best. 

He cannot help but fear that Palpatine is not so much manipulated as an active collaborator.

Judging by the twisted grimace on Anakin’s face, however, that is a thought Obi-Wan should keep to himself for the time being. Best to lead him into this slowly rather than overwhelm him. If he ends up doing something inadvisable in a fit of emotion… The fallout could be too terrible to contemplate.

~~~~

Anakin had… had almost forgotten that Obi-Wan started this whole investigation. Of course, he isn’t sympathetic to Anakin right now. He probably thinks this is what Palpatine deserves, or some bantha shit like that.

“You started this.” He doesn’t mean to say it, but the words fall out of his mouth before he can stop them. None of this would have happened if Obi-Wan had just let it be a regular power handover. But he didn't, he decided to go after Palpatine, accuse him of things...

"You started this whole thing," Anakin whispers again, staring at Obi-Wan. "None of this would have happened if you hadn't..."

"Anakin..." Obi-Wan both looks and sounds horrified. "I did my duty. I saw things that did not add up, and I reported it. If I had kept quiet about it... If I had done nothing, looked the other way... Anakin, that is precisely how corruption flourishes. How evil flourishes. By everyone else looking the other way and doing nothing."

Evil? Did... Did Obi-Wan just call Palpatine evil? Palpatine who's been by Anakin's side since childhood?

"How dare you!" he roars, taking some pleasure in watching Obi-Wan flinch backwards.

"Anakin, please, calm down." Obi-Wan raises his hands, a gesture of peace and proof of no ill intentions. Typical Obi-Wan, always so calm and bloody reasonable. As if he’s never had an upset emotion in his entire damn life.

He opens his mouth to say something else, but Anakin is beyond listening now. He flies to his feet, rage is flaring up inside him so hot he cannot breathe past it; with every exhalation it pours out of him in a stream of angry words.

"I should have known you carry a grudge against him! That's all this is, isn't it? You're angry that he was there for me when you couldn't be!"

Obi-Wan rears backwards again, as if slapped in the face, but Anakin refuses to back down. He's not going to let Obi-Wan's feelings derail this argument. It's too important for that!

"Palpatine is trustworthy! He's done so much for the Republic, and you and the Council just refuse to see it!" he snarls. "It all just comes down to your dislike and distrust of politicians, doesn't it?"

"Anakin, please, that's not it! You don't understand," Obi-Wan pleads, hands in the air, spread and reaching, but he stays back, doesn't move closer to Anakin. Like he’s afraid.

Good.

"If you're so wrapped up in your dislike of politicians that you can't trust him, can't you at least trust me when I say he's trustworthy? He's been there for me for over a decade, Obi-Wan. I know I can trust him!" Anakin‘s heart pounds in his chest and he can feel his own pulse in his neck, heavy and wild.

He stares at Obi-Wan, hopes so much that he will just... See what Anakin sees. Understand that Palpatine is not the enemy, he's a good politician, one of the few of them. Anakin is sure of it. This whole corruption investigation will come away with nothing and Obi-Wan will feel foolish then. Yeah, it's going to trial, but Anakin just knows it's going to prove Palpatine innocent. Who knows what will happen with Mas Amedda, but Palpatine will surely be fine. If only Obi-Wan could see that!

"Anakin..." Obi-Wan's voice is heavy and he can't meet Anakin's eyes.

Anakin's heart drops to his stomach and his chest aches. No. No. Things were going so well, they were mending the gap... and now... Obi-Wan just refuses to...

Oh.

"You don't trust me." The truth of it is like a lightsaber through the chest.

Obi-Wan doesn't trust him.

"Anakin! What are you saying? Of course I—!" Obi-Wan begins, but Anakin cuts him off again, can’t bear to hear him try to lie his way out of this conversation.

"No. You care, I have felt in the Force how much you care about me, I'm not stupid so I know that's true... But just because you care about me doesn't mean you trust me." He tries to swallow around the lump in his throat. He wishes it wasn't true, he does, but he knows it is.

"That's not—Anakin, please, that's not tru—!"

"It is! You don't trust me! The Council doesn't either!" His rage keeps building in his chest, and he can feel a headache coming on with how hard his pulse is beating. "But it doesn't matter right now. I want to know why you refuse to trust Palpatine. You trust Bail, don't you?" He has to make Obi-Wan see that his position regarding Palpatine is ridiculous. How can he distrust Palpatine simply because he's a politician if he trusts other politicians?

"I do, but Anakin—!"

"And you trust Padmé!"

The briefest of hesitations.

Anakin's heart plummets.

"I d—!"

"You don't trust Padmé either." It feels like a betrayal. A complete and utter betrayal. Anakin's chest hurts. How can Obi-Wan distrust Padmé? Anakin has to know. It's like he's woken up in an upside-down galaxy where everything is just a horrible farce of what it should be; so very very wrong. "Why? You brought her in on the investigation regarding Jedi missions. Why would you do that if you don't trust her? That makes no sense, Obi-Wan!"

"I did trust her, Anakin. Even so that is not the point. Regardless of whether I trust you, her, Bail, Senator Ha'han-ash, Senator Chuchi or anyone else has no bearing what so ever on whether or not I trust Palpatine. I have my reasons, Anakin, it's not just... Anakin?" Obi-Wan steps closer.

Anakin can't listen to him anymore. His mind has centred on one thing and it's all he can think of.

"Did."

"Pardon?" Obi-Wan sounds baffled.

"Did. Not do. You did trust her." Anakin stares at Obi-Wan, his stomach is fit to boiling with anger and upset and soon he can't bear to even look at his friend anymore. His eyes fall away.

"Anakin..."

"I can't do this right now, Obi-Wan. I just... I need space. Come back to me once you've got your head on straight so you're actually capable of trusting people again. I cannot believe you, I just... No."

He turns on his heel and stalks out of the room, ignoring Obi-Wan calling for him.

He can't stand to even look at him anymore.

How could he?

Everything was... Everything was...

How could he?

—

(Supreme Chancellor Obi-Wan Kenobi masterpost)

[affcgato-archived]

Ben Solo / main verse (heavily, heavily divergent)

The heir to the Skywalker bloodline, Solo possessed raw strength in the Force & had the potential for limitless power. He was born at the end of the Galactic Civil War in 5 ABY, when the Galactic Empire surrendered to the New Republic. His parents, General Han Solo & Princess Leia Organa, were considered great heroes of the Alliance to Restore the Republic.

During the New Republic Era, Solo was part of a new generation of Jedi apprentices trained by his uncle, Jedi Master Luke Skywalker. However, Solo was seduced by the dark side through the machinations of the phantom Sith Lord Darth Sidious & his creation, Supreme Leader Snoke.

Under the thrall of Snoke, Solo destroyed his master's training temple & killed his fellow students - acts which earned him the moniker "Jedi Killer" along with the new identity of Kylo Ren.

early life

Ben Solo was born in 5 ABY in Hanna City, Chandrila on the day that the Galactic Concordance was signed between the New Republic & the Galactic Empire, formally ending the Galactic Civil War - which had already resulted in the deaths of the late emperor palpatine, & ben's maternal grandfather anakin skywalker, redeemed in his dying moments from his sith persona darth vader.

Ben almost never stood a chance. Even before he was born, his mother could feel the light & the dark at war within him - likening her unborn son to a living band of light that occasionally dimmed & was sometimes thrust through with a vein of darkness.

In his youth, Solo's parents had active lives in their respective professions. Han, a smuggler before joining the Rebellion, was unable to stay in one place for long, while Organa became occupied with routine senatorial duties. Ben, who aspired to become a pilot like his father since childhood, inherited amazing piloting skills from him. Organa, meanwhile, became a respected senator in the New Republic. The busy lives of Organa & Han often kept them away from their son, causing Solo to develop a sense of loneliness.

Jedi Training

As the Force awakened in young Solo, his parents grew to believe that he needed guidance despite their efforts to build a normal life for him. In 15 ABY, Ben began his Jedi training as part of Skywalker's initiative to restore the Jedi Order. He became Skywalker's apprentice prior to his tenth birthday, & was already his uncle's "most prized student." Even then, it was clear to Skywalker that his nephew was inherently powerful with the Force despite his lack of training in the Jedi arts, a testament to the raw power of his family's bloodline.

Through Skywalker's training, Ben developed a strong sense of devotion to the ways of the Jedi. He kept a calligraphy set filled with Jedi insights in his quarters during his time with Skywalker. As master & apprentice, they traveled across the galaxy accumulating artifacts and learning more about the Jedi Order's ancient history in the hope of fully restoring it.

beginning of divergence

It was during this period in Solo's life that he came into contact with Snoke, an enigmatic Force user who was strong with the dark side. While Snoke's intention was to cultivate a friendship with the young jedi that he could use to coax him down the path to the dark side of the Force, that plan would never fully materialize.

Ben had heard a voice throughout his young life, & long believed it to be Snoke's. He told no one about this voice at first, as he had long felt isolated & lonely with his parents' erratic schedule. it was under Skywalker's training, & his own personal study into the recovered archives from the jedi temple, that he would begin to recognize the dangers that might accompany the voice if left alone & unchecked. It would eventually come to head when the conflicting emotions arising from the emotional manipullation caused Ben to lash out during training, injuring himself & his training partner enough for Luke to notice.

Taking his apprentice aside, Luke would finally talk to him about the Skywalker bloodline, & the legacy it carried with it - easing the sense of isolation Ben had long felt while acknowledging his own doubts & concerns. Knowing his apprentice was being targeted by something sinister, but not knowing the source of the malignancy, Luke began teaching him advance techniques to help him shield himself, & his mind, as well as how to distance himself from the Force as a last resort defense should something arise from this presence.

first confrontation with the knights of ren

During the early years of Solo's apprenticeship, Lor San Tekka, a traveler noted for his expertise on the Jedi Order, informed Skywalker about the discovery of an ancient Jedi outpost on the planet Elphrona. Embarking on a mission to investigate San Tekka's findings, Skywalker brought Ben with him, knowing that, like himself, Solo was interested in discovering Jedi artifacts. Along the way, Solo was contacted by Snoke. While he kept up the ruse of allowing this dark presence into his mind, he later informed his Master as to what has transpired, causing further concern as Luke recognized the tactics.

The outpost that they discovered was well preserved and the entrance intact. Both master & apprentice were impressed by it, though Skywalker warned that they should exercise caution while exploring the outpost, recounting a similar situation that nearly ended with his death in years past. The outpost was a repository of holocrons & other artifacts that Skywalker likened to a treasure trove.

A group of marauders, dressed in black, entered the outpost after the two Jedi & their explorer companion. A warrior calling himself "Ren" spoke on the group's behalf, declaring that the outpost and its contents were claimed by the Knights of Ren. Rejecting the Knights' claim, Skywalker drew his lightsaber & introduced himself as the last Jedi. Ben also activated his weapon, but remained out of the ensuing fight, as Skywalker instructed him to protect San Tekka.

Ren conceded the battle after his Knights were defeated by Skywalker. During the confrontation, however, he sensed that the dark side was strong with Ben. He invited Ven to seek out the Knights in the future, offering to teach the young apprentice about aspects of the Force contrary to Jedi teachings.

During this trip, Luke would take Ben traveling to the edge between the known galaxy & unexplored space, as he had many times before to test the seemingly limitless capacity of his apprentice & nephew.

a new generation of jedi

It was not long before the Order expanded to include more than Skywalker & Solo, as the former took it upon himself to train multiple apprentices at the same time. In addition to several new recruits, Hennix, Tai, & Voe were apprenticed to Skywalker, * as such, they became acquainted with his first & strongest pupil. As children, they would sit on the temple grounds learning about the Force through Skywalker's lectures, while, at the same time, honing their skills by levitating rocks.

Solo's natural affinity with the Force did not go unnoticed by his peers, particularly Voe, who struggled to hone her skills despite training just as hard as Skywalker's nephew. While training on the temple grounds, Voe watched as Solo levitated a large rock with ease, & wondered why he was far stronger than her. According to Skywalker, however, strength had nothing to do with how the Force worked. He likened using the Force to opening a door, explaining that the Force flowed more easily through those who were open to its energy.

Notwithstanding Skywalker's view on the Force, Solo surpassed his peers in every aspect of their training, including lightsaber combat & meditation. At one point, he defeated Voe in a sparring match. As their training progressed, Solo suspected that Voe resented him for his power.

His relationships with the other students were different. Hennix could make Solo laugh, & Tai tried to help him cope with the pressures of being a Skywalker. Solo assured his fellow Jedi student that he held nothing back, but through the Force Tai perceived a side to Solo that he hid from the others, including himself. Solo listened, but said nothing while Tai expressed his belief that everyone should be themselves.

further diversion from canon

While undergoing further training during this time period, Ben began to feel the ramped up pressure of the dark presence in his mind, & as such, he began spending more & more time deep in study even apart from his own Master as his sense of foreboding began to set him on edge. His anxiety was realized when, twenty-four years after the Battle of Endor, the truth about the parentage of Solo's mother was revealed by Organa's political enemies in the New Republic Senate.

It was a small mercy that Luke had prepared for this moment, having given Ben the truth of his bloodline & legacy against his sister's wishes many years before, & the fallout was largely contained. Ben would take advantage of the chaos this revelation created, though, letting the voice that had long dipped into his nightmares believe its plans were well underway so that he & his master might finally get ahead of whatever lurked in the shadows.

The revelation would come with a fanfare of fire; one night when Skywalker went to his nephew's bedroom one evening, he found the young man asleep. Standing over his sleeping student, Skywalker reached out through the Force & saw a vision of what would come to pass if this dark presence was allowed to fully sink its claws into his apprentice, & claim him as its own; he saw the death & destruction Solo would someday bring to everything Skywalker loved.

When Ben awakened hours later, it was to Luke offering him his hand, & telling him it was time they talked about the moment they had once realized may come to pass. it was time. in the early, pre-dawn hours, there was an explosion that brought down the entire hut, ostensibly resulting in the death of the once-prodigy. twenty-three year old Ben Organa-Solo would be buried, & mourned, his presence lost in the Force to all because of a tragic accident.

or at least - that would be the official story, with the truth only known to the Master that packed his apprentice into a t-65B X-wing with coordinates known only to the the young boy piloting, the droid R2-D2, & Lor San Tekka.

ahch-to, & study in exile

Ben had learned of the location of the remote aquatic planet Ahch-To during his early tears as Skywalker's apprentice, having read about it & studied it in the ancient relics & holocrons they had come across in their many travels. On fleeing in the pre-dawn hours, the remote planet in a largely unknown part of the galaxy was Ben's logical first choice, & upon landing there, he tamped down hard on his connection to the Force - all but fully severing himself from it bar the bar minimum that would allow him to continue guidance & training from those who came before him - obi-wan kenobi, & yoda, among others.

It was his intent to live out his life in exile, keeping himself far from the reaches of whatever dark force sought to turn him into a weapon against his family & other loved ones. Once his Master had rooted out this evil, R2-D2 would relay his location. What was supposed to take months, howeverm turned into years. Eventually, Ben felt the suffocating loneliness start to close in on him. Six years after he fled to ahch-to, he would find another landing on the planet.

another, searching for him.

[nimsajlove]

Brothers (V)

Not the last part, sadly. I was hoping to finish this thing today but even stuck at home, I can’t do it...

Brothers-AU  Ao3

Part IV , Part VI

*~*

Ahsoka won the one fight. With the help of Aayla Secura, Plo Koon and Anakin, the files against Fives disappeared with surprising speed and Ahsoka managed to cover up the whole thing with words, that Cody and Obi-Wan Kenobi had given her this time, and somehow transfer Fives into her ultimate care. She wasn't quite sure, how she really did it! But she sensed that the voices of Senator Amidala and Senator Organa had been of great support in front of the Senate.

However, she suffered a defeat in another. "And you are sure, that we can't treat more men?", she asked quietly and looked at her feet, she was sitting cross-legged in the bunk under her own. Rex was standing in front of her, on the side of his head Kix had attached a thick plaster. It looked strange, almost unsettling. "I do not think so. We finished our unit and I'm still amazed, that Cody agreed. But we don't know, who would tell the Senate about this if he could.", he explained and his tone softened as he saw her grimace in pain. The last few days had been tough, her nerves had worn out and in the end Rex had taken over her paperwork from the past week. Just to catch up a little. She had to overcome many fears. The fear of the Council, of the Chancellor. Yes, even a little fear of failing herself. None of that had done her any good, and it didn't improve her tired features.

Two seconds passed while she chewed her nails and he watched her, before he dropped next to her with a small thud. She was so tired... She wanted to be strong, really! She wanted to be there, keep an eye on Fives. But she hadn't even found the strength to follow him and his brothers to dinner this afternoon. Was she even hungry at all? "He's in good hands.", it mumbled next to her and she nodded dully. "I know." "Then why are you making yourself even more stressed? He's alive and he'll still be when you restet.", asked Rex and she rolled the answer back and forth in her head for a while. Because she was needed? Or, at least, wanted to be? Sometimes this little fear crept into her mind, that the clones would eventually leave her alone. Like the Council. She knew she would have to accept it, if that day came. But that didn't made the thought easier! His hand grabbed her shoulder and pulled it against his. With a small sigh her head came to rest against his and fingers layed quietly on her temple. She stared into the air for a few seconds, then breathed out deeply and let the warmth drive away all thoughts. 

* ~ * 

"Why are you hesitating?", Jesse asked, looking around searching for what had upset his general. She shrugged her shoulders, her posture so strangely insecure and nervous. "I don't know, maybe a bad feeling?", she mumbled and then climbed into the ship, which would bring her back onto her cruiser. Actually, she couldn't wait to get away! 

The Jedi, especially Anakin Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi, had become downright intrusive in the past few days. And even if the two Jedi brought back fond memories in her, it caused enough pain for her to want to avoid them.

Saying goodbye to Cody was short, but she had looked at him honestly and even a small smile had appeared on her face. Despite the problems of the past few days. "I owe you one.", were her last words, his as he had yelled after her: "Definitly!" She was still grinning at the thought of it. 

Back on the cruiser, it seemed as if the bad memories were slowly being washed away. She was cautious for the first few days, although her bad feeling at the departure had disappeared now. But then she noticed more and more how the men laughed and joked together. She was greeted with a smile at any time of day and at some point it passed on to her too. Even Fives laughed again, it was really contagius. She was grateful, that the clones could always, somehow, find something good in every situation. 

* ~ * 

Almost two months passed. The war went on around her and a strange distance had developed between her and the men. She wasn't sure where it came from, but she seemed to separate herself from them every now and then. She spent more time meditating, letting Rex choose which missions to go on next. She was still helping, eating and sleeping with the men. But she still felt this distance and was worried, that it was coming from her side... Maybe she was missing a nice fight after all. She didn't knew if she should have been happy, when Cody called her and jokingly remembered her that she was still owning him something, even if the situation was probably not funny! At last she would be able to do something without putting more blood from the clones on her cap. Because this was something, that still worried her. Maybe it was better, to get away from these men and let them be happy with the small and peacefull missions. 

But when the men heard of her preparations, they surprised her with their anger. Hesitantly and slightly confused, she sat alone while eating and assumed that all the distance had now turned into dislike after all. Rex, Jesse and Kix gave it away as a lie, when the three of them sat down with her and acted as if nothing had ever happened. It wasn't until the young woman chewed on her food for a few minutes in silence that Jesse nudged her in the side. "What is it, did you swallow your tongue?", he joked and when Ahsoka shrugged, the other two fell silent. There it was again, that distance. She felt so incredibly heavy as she watched the men seem to be more relaxed with each new peace mission. "What's stuck in your throat?", asked Kix and she pressed her forearms on the table, she wondered if it was worth sharing her worries with those, whom she had called brothers for years. Finally she spoke up. "The men avoided me today, have I moved so far from them?", she asked quietly and the three clones began to chuckle. She looked up with furrowed eyebrows. "That's not funny!", she hissed softly and put her fork aside. Rex was the first to swallow his amusement and patted her head across the table, earning him another angry twinkle from the general. 

"You know, I think it's more like, that the men are offended.", Jesse finally grinned broadly. "Running into a mission without all of us? Not even you can pull that on us.", Kix agreed. 

Even later, she hadn't quite digested that the men would just follow her. In what would be certainly the death of most of them. She didn't want that! She paced up and down in her office and was nearly scared to death when the door suddenly slid open. Rex and Fives stood in front of her and the ARC just shook his head. "How about some sleep until we get there?", he suggested, she shook her head firmly. “No, it’s not like I could sleep now anyway. And don't even think about calling Kix! You don't want to see my dinner again and neither do I!”, she threatened Rex, before he could open his mouth. Both clones smirked and now entered, their general began to pace up and down again. The two sat on the desk. “Then how about running around on the bridge. At least you have space there.", Rex joked and she stared at him. “How can you joke now? I am leading more than a hundred men to their certain death, with a really high probability!” She started softly and grew louder, until she crossed her arms angrily and wondered if this was a good time for a little scream. Just to calm her nerves.

Fives stood up, his gaze dead serious. “These men follow you voluntarily! You lead them because they want you to lead them. Sooner or later each of us dies, let us at least hope to be allowed to die for the right thing.", he explained and she heard a passion in his voice that has not been seen since Umbara. A lump formed in her throat, but she forced herself to maintain her composure. There had been a time, where she had thought so as well. “With all due respect, brother! I want you to die for the right thing, after all of you have had a chance to live. A real life without the bolts and bombs flying around you all the time. You should be allowed to live, not have to.” Her voice was hard and cold, it was difficult to speak past the lump. Rex got up too and came up to her. “I want to live right here and now. And if we die out there, it will be because we made the right decision to trust you." She looked at him and realized, that at was herself who built this distance. She was so afraid to loose one oft hem! Tears started to form in her eyes und she turned away. 

* ~ * 

She had been standing alone in front of the battle plans for a while now and looked at them, the situation was not only tricky. Fatal was probably the better word and she was still gnawing at Rex's idea, of ​​how they could still save the whole thing. He had gone, alone. She didn't like it, but she also knew that she couldn't run after him always and everywhere. He had Cody with him and Unit 99! It would all go well… She remembered her brief conversation with these clones while telling Rex to be careful. A smile crept on her face, Wrecker reminded her of Hardcase. The two alone would certainly have been enough, to reduce the entire base to rubble and ashes.

Footsteps approached from behind and she looked up, Anakin came up to her and clasped his hands behind his back. She had to grin. "You had a nice conversation? How is she doing?”, she asked softly and he smirked, she hadn't spoken to her master in a long time. Not really after she left Coruscant in such a hurry. But she wasn't blind. "You're clever.", her former master admitted and examined the plans with her. She felt his restlessness and sighed, before loosening her arms and looking at him. "What is it, Master?", she asked and it was unexpected for her, when his worried look met her. 

"I missed you.", he muttered and she smirked. "Sure you weren't just missing Hevy?", she teased and he rolled his eyes before carefully lifting an arm. An invitation she could decline if she wanted.

She swallowed, since the council had expelled her once, she had forbidden the other Jedi from any avoidable physical contact. She knew Plo Koon was sorry, but she couldn't just see past it all. She also knew that every time, Master Kenobi saw her, he worriedly stroked his beard and tried to put his hand on her shoulder. Since then she has consistently avoided him. Now she and her master had never maintained closer contact, except for a deep bond. But it hurt him too, to know her so far away and distant. And that hurt her too ... She might not really always agree with him, but he was her friend and with a small sigh she slipped into the embrace and held him tight for a few seconds before releasing him. 

* ~ * 

She was crouching on the floor and biting her nails, that hideous habit that had only emerged since the Fives-Thing! She had closed her eyes and was thinking, trying not to lose her mind while doing so. Her master and the other two Jedi doubted the captain's statement, she didn't! If Rex said that had to be Echo, it was him! But what exactly should she do now? She had to go there, take him home. That was out of the question. Could she involve his brothers in this? No, the clones were more important to him than she was. In the end she was expendable for her men, even if they were loyal to her. Her brothers would get over her loss, should it occur. After all, they would then have Echo back again.

"Have you made up your mind?", asked a calm voice and she opened her eyes. She had previously included Hunter in her deliberations, and he had told her that Rex was up to the same thing. This, of course, accelerated her decision-making process. "Yes, let me just talk a word with Cody.", she snorted and went into the medical tent. The commander refused to leave the planet, after all he was more or less patched up. He was awake and staring at her. "And?", he asked, and if she hadn't been to bed faster, he might have got up to meet her. “I'll go and look for Echo. The others must not follow me! You can do this for me, right?” The clone nodded, worry darkened his eyes and Ahsoka patted him carefully on the shoulder, trying to calm him down. "I'll take your boys with me, let's see what they're good for.", she joked and saw Cody smile briefly, before she turned around and disappeared. 

* ~ * 

Did these shafts never end? Echo smiled next to her and she looked down at him, had she said something? "Don't look like that, I know where we're going to get out.", he grinned and it actually cheered her up. She was full of bruises and minor injuries, but Echo was alive and she had her arm wrapped around him to hold him up. It was all worth it! 

Wrecker behind her sighed again and she had to smile again. "I'll make sure that you get a few more before we run.", she said and received a comradely push against the shoulder blade. "I hope so!", laughed the massive clone, and Crosshair in front of her just shook his head.

"Here it is. I just don't think, you'll like it.", Echo grinned at Ahsoka and Tech opened a hatch, the wind blew in on them immediately and she stuck her head out. It went down from up here, far down. "No different than jumping into the underworld.", she thought aloud and out of the corner of her eye she saw Echo tilt his head. "You speak from experience?", he asked and she nodded. 

* ~ *

 Every bone hurt her, but it didn't matter! Because Echo was as intact as he could be and she was still alive. In addition, Wrecker was totally amused, to have thrown a Jedi for the first time in his life. She smiled too, she hadn't wanted to take the fun away from him and had given up her other acrobatics. It had been funny, especially when Hunter asked her loudly, if she still was sane to volunteer to do this. It had been easier somehow, now that she wasn't surrounded by the clones that her heart was so attached to. Besides, her brothers got along quite well without the fighting, but these ones...

The gunship started to land and she got up, the ground seemed to sway slightly under her as she braced herself on the wall and Echo looked at her from the side. She had filled in a few of his gaps. "General, maybe..." She held up her hand and cut him off. "I'm fine, I'm standing upright on my own two feet. But I'll send you straight to Kix.", she grinned and Echo returned it, albeit hesitantly.

The ship opened and she could see a whole group of people rushing to meet them. She pulled back a little and let the clones go outside, not at least to get out of the view of all the others, including her former master. She really couldn't use one of his lectures now. She might have underestimated the enemy a tiny bit... Echo was welcomed with open arms by his brothers and they all escort him to Kix, Ahsoka waited a few seconds until Tech stuck his head back into the ship. 

"They are gone.", he announced and she left the ship with a deep sigh, the pain in her body was still dull. But it was slowly growing and she just wanted to get into a bunk and close her eyes for a few minutes. Nothing more. "Thanks, Cody actually didn't exaggerate.", she said to Hunter and tried to drive away the exhaustion. The clone looked her up and down once and then smiled a small smile. “He wasn't exaggerating when he spoke of you either. General Tano, you look awful.” She laughed, it hurt and she held her ribs. "Not everyone can have a genetic advantage.", she joked and said goodbye.

She began to hobble into her improvised command tent as fast as she could and sat on the floor, preferring not to inspect her injuries. Now that all that adrenaline was gone, it hurt like hell. Her right lekku burned like fire and blood was dried on him, her shoulder and forehead. Her head felt like it would explode, her sense of balance seemed to have been damaged. She knew, that blood was still oozing from her left hand. But she just didn't dare to look down. She just sat there and breathed against the sting of her ribs, wondering if she should just allow herself some sleep here on the floor.

She never got to it, three figures appeared in her tent. "Ahsoka?" The question sounded scared and she wondered, how bad she really looked. It wasn't like she had a mirror on hand. She raised her right hand to protect her eyes from the incident light and to identify the people. It was her old master, who immediately turned around and pressed his comlink. Rex, however, came over to her with long strides and pulled her upright again by the shoulders. When had she sunken to the ground? “It's okay. I can sit alone.", she grumbled and fixed her gaze on Obi-Wan Kenobi, he looked at her with an expression of concern and urgency. "Sure.", Rex grumbled ironically, but she braced herself against his attempts to get her to her feet. "Master Kenobi, did something happen?", she asked instead, feeling a slight knot form in her stomach. Something actually happened...

The Jedi hesitated before speaking. “Anakin will kill me, for not dragging you to the nearest Bacta tank right away. But ... Echo just shared some of his new experiences and knowledge with us. He discovered a conspiracy, the clones were actually given a hidden order.” She looked at him with wide eyes and could see in his, what she was thinking. It was finally proven, Fives was right! "We'll be able to help them all?", she asked choked and only felt dully, how Rex grabbed her tighter. Kenobi nodded and she took a deep breath, tears flowed and she knew that all the men would finally have a chance of real, free will. Then it got dark. 

* ~ * 

When she woke up again, she was confused. It was bright, white, sterile. This wasn't a battlefield! Where was she? Where were the men she had to protect? Was Echo still safe with his brothers? Did she really make it? Panicked, she sat up and looked around, she was alone in a room, she identified it as the medistation of her cruiser. Where was everyone? Had she just been sent back and left alone? 

Suddenly, that feeling was there again, that deep fear of loneliness. She gasped, she'd had all of that under control for years, and now… She wanted to get up and noticed the many cables, that were glued and clamped to her skin. The panic overflowed and with a jerk she threw herself out of bed, tearing off the cables and lying there breathless. She was trying to find her legs, to do something before something happened. Her stomach was knotted and it was difficult for her to breathe. There were dull voices and when hands grabbed her, she tried to throw herself against them. Then it went quiet and dark again. 

The next time she opened her eyes, she was sick. Groaning, she immediately closed her eyes and straightened up, one hand pressed to her mouth. She could hardly breathe and suddenly a warm hand was on her back and someone pushed a bucket into her hands. Just in time, whatever had been in her stomach, it just greeted her cheerfully. She hugged the bucket, trembling.

A few minutes passed, before she was nothing but a trembling misery on the bed. She leaned back and more than two hands carefully helped her, there was a cool wall behind her. Before she could drop the bucket, someone took it from her and now she tried again, to look at the world around her. The difference to before was fatal! It wasn't the white ceiling of the medistation, but rather the familiar gray of the quarters. And as she took a deep breath, the familiar scent of her home flooded her lungs. The light had been dimmed and she could now hear and see how crowded it was. Oh by the Force, how many had seen all of this? The first that her eyes could focus on was Echo. He was sitting on one of the lower bunks and when he saw, that she was really looking at him, he smiled widely. That was nice... The next one was Kix and she realized quickly, why he looked so guilty. It was clear, that he had pumped the medication into her body. But did he really had a choice? Jesse sat next to him, arms on his knees and gaze serious, but relieved, fixed on her. Hevy, Droidbait, Cutup, Fives, Cody... she spotted a few other faces and then turned to the nearest one. Rex was sitting on the matress she had been put on and when she blinked at him, he actually picked up a second bucket.

"Please don't say, you need this one too.", he muttered and a laugh escaped her, her ribs no longer hurt. Carefully she sat up properly and rubbed her aching head, her gaze slid back to Echo. He looked so much better... "How long was I gone?", she asked quietly and as if that had been a secret sign, her brothers came closer to the bed and Cody shooed the others away, but kept himself in the background. “Almost two weeks. One of them in the tank.”, Cutup announced and threw himself on her foot end, Driodbait shoved him heartily to the side and climbed next to him. Two weeks? "What did I miss?", she asked still quietly and Echo and Fives had to laugh, she gave them a strange look. What was there to laugh about? "I can lend you a hand, if you need it.", Echo announced and a shockingly realistic prosthesis landed in her hands. Without an arm. She paused, then raised her eyebrows and returned his new hand. "Very funny.", she commented dryly, but was infinitely happy. That was the first joke Fives was involved in for who knows how long! 

"The GAR is dechipped.", Jesse threw in and simply sat down on the floor, in front of the bunk, he had a satisfied grin on his face. "And Skywalker screwed up!", Hevy announced and all the clones laughed softly, that was almost too loud for her head! "Why?" She asked pained, rubbing her temples. “The Senator is even less of a secret now, than it was before. But the men and General Kenobi cover him as best they can.", Cody grinned from further back and she had to laugh again, what a surprise! Her master has never been good at keeping things a secret... 

Kix stared at his hands and she recognized the expression. She got up a little more and tilted her head. "Kix?" He looked up and she grinned widely, it elicited a small smile. She wanted to see that, even if, according to her stomach, she didn't felt like grinning. "What exactly did you find?", she asked in a pretended good mood. He didn't fall for it, but finally began to enumerate.

"Serious head injuries. The right lekku was completely slit.” She raised her right hand and stroked the tentacle, a bulging scar pressing against her fingers. There could have been worse. "Burns, abrasions, grazes, broken ribs ..." The list was long and yet it had to end at some point. "And two fingers of the left hand were torn off.", the clone finished and exhaled deeply, Ahsoka looked at her hands for the first time. The right one was perfectly fine again, but the left one looked so out of place. The ring and middle finger were completely missing and she clenched her hand once into a fist, it was as if she could still feel them. With a shudder, she remembered how she'd faded out the pain, after wrenching herself from the grip of a droid. 

The men around her waited to see, if she would say something.She looked up and carefully swung her legs out of bed. "Where are we?", she asked, waiting for the world to stop turning. That headache would kill her sooner or later! Breathing deeply, she propped herself up on her knees, tried not to gag again and heard Kix start to rummage in his backpack. "Hyperspace, on the way to Coruscant.", Cody replied and she nodded vaguely, why weren't her men there already? The rest of the fight couldn't possibly have lasted two weeks. "Why are you here?", she asked further, when Kix pressed a tablet into her left hand. Without looking for water, she swallowed it. Her brothers moved a little closer, slowly it was getting tight on the bed. Droidbait and Cutup sat diagonally behind her, Rex on her right and Kix on her left. Fives, Echo, Jesse and Hevy were crouched on the floor and Cody was leaning against the opposite wall. "You're kidding, right?", Jesse asked, and she shrugged. "I wouldn't have blamed you, for flying home as soon as possible.", she muttered and massaged her forehead, the pain seemed to subside and the nausea finally went away! She loved Kix, he always had one of the few tablets that she could swallow. 

Someone patted her foot and she looked up, Hevy looked at her with a surprising seriousness. "You took all the fun away from us, but we can't just leave you behind!" She wanted to protest, that leaving her on the medistation wouldn't have been such a big deal. "Don't argue, I won't go anywhere again without anyone of my family, this includes you too!", Echo announced and tears tingled in her eyes.

This unconditional love, that was shown to her here, was so different from her worries in the last few days. She wasn't sure, what she had expected or feared. Maybe anger, that she'd left them all to go off alone? Before she could start crying, however, Hevy rose energetically. "I'm starving, let's get something to eat!" Ahsoka hesitated, food sounded nice. But somehow... "When was the last meal?", she asked and Hevy shrugged. “No idea, 10 or 11 hours ago? Since you decided to throw yourself off the bed.", he grinned and it made her smile. "Then I don't want to stand in your way." But nobody moved. "Your stomach could definitely take something too.", Kix then threw in and stood up, offered her his hand, to help her up. She still hesitated, the pill was good. But she wasn't hungry either. "You haven't had anything real in your stomach for two weeks, do us this favor.", Rex insisted and with a sigh, she grabbed Kix's hand and pulled herself to her feet. "You can have my dessert too.", Cutup said as he pushed past her and his grin made her laugh. Suddenly the faces of all the men in the room lit up and she was a bit ashamed, of having burdened the soldiers for so long. "You are too good to me.", she tried to joke and squealed, as Hevy grabbed her and lifted her onto his shoulders. "Yep, you can really thank us more often.", he laughed and they all went off together.

[steves-on-a-plane]

Under the Moons of Coruscant

Words: 1,111 Pairing: Obi Wan x Jedi!Reader Summary: Reading is walking the halls of the Jedi Temple on their way to get breakfast when they bump into a distraught Obi Wan. Just back from his latest mission with his defiant Padawan, Master Kenobi is a bit out of sorts and he decides to do something that takes the reader by surprise.

It was late at night or early in the morning depending on one’s perception of time. For you, a Jedi Knight who liked to rise well before the small sun on Coruscant; it was early morning. You drew your cloak tighter around your shoulders, wishing the Grand Council would keep the temperature of the Temple a few degrees warmer. It was no matter, you resolved as you continued walking down the corridor on your way to a much need breakfast at the nearest refectory, the brisk walk would keep you warm.

“Insolent! Unteachable!” Approaching from the other end of the corridor was Jedi Master Obi Wan Kenobi. For Obi Wan, who had just returned to the Temple after not sleeping for two standard days, it seemed very late at night. The planet’s four moons were still casting light through the temple’s windows as he stalked down the hall mumbled to himself about his insufferable Padawan.

“Master Kenobi?” You called out to him softly. You and Obi Wan had come up the Jedi ranks from Younglings to Knights together. You probably would have earned your Master ranks together too, had Master Quin Gon’s untimely death not pushed forward his training timeline so much. Being that you were from the same Youngling class and had both stayed close to the Temple most of your lives it was safe to say that you and Obi Wan knew each other well. At least well enough to know when his troublesome Padawan was really wearing him down.

“Master Kenobi?” You repeated, he was much closer to you now, only a few steps away at most. You stopped walking; your hands lightly connected with his shoulders. This physical touch seemed to finally rouse him from his own mind.

“[Y/N]?” He asked, shaking his head. “I didn’t even see you.” He looked down at you with bewilderment. He had truly been deep inside his own head.  

“So, I noticed.” You giggled.

“I’m sorry, [Y/N].” He apologized. “I barley just stepped off the transport. I haven’t had much sleep…Sometimes I wish…” He sighed. “Where are you off to this time of day?”

“Breakfast. Are you alright Obi?” You asked, fully aware of your hands were still gently resting on his shoulders. “You seem distracted.”

“How could I not be?” He scoffed. “I’m lucky to be alive no thanks to my Padawan.”

“So, things with Anakin aren’t going well?” You asked, cautiously.

“Are they ever?” He replied. His voice full of defeat. “I want to honor Master Qui Gon’s wishes, [Y/N]. I truly do, but Anakin! He’s impulsive and rash. He does things without any foresight or concern. He’s…”

“He’s everything that you are not.” You noted.

“Exactly!” Obi Wan agreed.

“Master Qui Gon often said that a Jedi Master can learn as much from his Padawan as the Padawan can learn from them. Perhaps that’s why the force has brought you and Anakin together.” You suggested.

Obi Wan’s eyes began to wander your face as he considered what you were saying. You felt like he was looking right through you while he once again retreated into his mind. He’d always been like that, as long as you’d known him. Obi took the teachings of the Jedi very seriously and you knew he reflected on the ways of the Force often. He’d been taught, much like you, that the Force was there to guide the Jedi and the will of the Force should always be respected.

“Perhaps you are right.” Obi Wan agreed suddenly. “Master Qui Gon did say on more than one occasion that I can be overly calculating. Perhaps it would do me well to act on my impulses. Just this once.”

You felt his hand brush against your cheek. You leaned into his warm touch. Your own hands moved from his shoulders and rested on his chest. You could feel the heat of his body even through the rough texture of his jedi robes. You had often dreamed of a moment like this. Just you and Obi Wan holding each other. He cupped your face with both his hands and pulled it towards him. You waited for him to hesitate or for his hands to drop at the last second, but they didn’t. Your lips touched his and again you waited for him to pull back, but he didn’t.

When you realized that he wasn’t going to push you away, you leaned into him. You grasped at his shirt hungrily, grabbing fistfuls of fabric. He too trying to pull you closer. It was the first time either of you had touched anyone like this. It was forbidden by the council.

“Wait!” You gasped, coming up for air. “Obi I-I…”

“Oh [Y/N], I’m so sorry!” He apologized immediately. “I don’t know what I was thinking. I-well I wasn’t thinking! That was foolish of me.” While Obi Wan scolded himself and made his rushed apology, you noticed that he still held you in his arms.

“Obi Wan, it’s alright.” You moved your hands once again. This time placing them behind his neck. Your thumbs gently rubbed along his jawline. “I’ve loved you since we were children.” You confessed. “But something like this…It would defy the council in a big way. Are you sure that you want to bring that kind of trouble upon yourself?”

Obi Wan didn’t have time to answer you. A set of footsteps could be heard from behind him. Though the pair of you leapt apart, you knew it was too late, you’d been spotted.

“Oh, there you are Master,” The voice of Anakin Skywalker could be heard as he traipsed down the hall. “I want to speak to you about…is this a bad time?” Anakin smiled wickedly when he spotted his master embracing you. He’d thought nothing of it at first, the two of you were very close. But when you sprung apart so quickly it did raise suspicion. “Perhaps I should come back later?” Anakin raised an eyebrow suggestively.

“It’s alright, I was just going.” You announced, feeling your mouth go dry. The moons were going down and the sun was coming up at last.

“[Y/N], wait…” Obi Wan reached for your arm. You let his fingertips graze you as you walked past.

“We’ll talk later Master Kenobi.” You told him. “For now, your Padawan needs you. “Anakin.” You nodded politely to the Padawan before continuing on your way to the refectory.

“What was that all about?” Anakin asked his master quietly as you walked away.

“Not a word of this to anyone is that understood?” Obi Wan ordered him.

“Believe me, I understand better than you think.” Anakin nodded. “We should talk, Master.”

[ramblings-of-a-mad-cat]

I've noticed that you use the R*ylo tag a lot and I was wondering if you could explain why you ship something that's so abusive? I'm not condemning you for shipping them, I used to myself I'm just wondering if you could explain *your* reasons? I don't think that I'll ever understand why people do but maybe you could help me take the first few steps?

Oh, no problem! 

First, I would like to clarify that I don’t really consider myself an active part of the Star Wars fandom, and I am aware that Reylo shippers can often be toxic about things that have nothing to do with the actual ship. (Finn, John Boyega, etc.) Might go without saying, but I do like to make sure everyone knows that I think that behavior isn’t okay. 

I have also heard the Reylo ship described as abusive. While I can more than understand that interpretation, I wouldn’t say I agree with it. That is, I don’t think this ship is any more problematic than say, MC/Merula. It’s a traditional case of enemies of lovers. True, Ben Solo said and did some terrible things to Rey. He tried to kill her friends, he Force-probed her mind, etc. But on the other hand...she also gave him the scar on his face, and stabbed him in TROS. I don’t think of their antagonistic behavior toward each other as abuse. I think of it as simply being two people on opposing sides of a war, a life-or-death war, who are also wrestling with confused feelings for each other. A growing fondness and respect. Enemies to lovers. 

In general, I tend to think it’s a bit odd to condemn Kylo Ren as a villain...more than we condemn Darth Vader, who’s onscreen body count is significantly higher, and includes children. Ben is trash, I don’t deny it. He did terrible things and that makes him interesting to me...but I guess I just don’t understand the hatred he gets from half of the fandom. Anakin slaughtered an entire tribe of sand-people and was not sorry. He called them “animals.” Meanwhile, Ben murdered his father and doing so “split his spirit to the bone.” I guess this also applies to shipping him with Rey. I’ll admit, I find it odd that people think it’s toxic for Rey to want to redeem him...when it’s the same idea as Luke wanting to redeem Vader. Like, the exact same. The only difference is that the bond is romantic isntead of familial. (No, J.J, that was not a “sibling” kiss. Stop trying to appease both sides, dude.) 

Why do I ship them? Well, mostly because of TLJ. I will admit that TROS didn’t mishandle this ship the way it mishandled so much else, such as Ben’s redemption and death...but this fire really started in the second movie. Could just be the performances, or the chemistry that the actors have, or maybe it’s how Ben and Rey are written. They do have some interesting parallels. I dunno, I just really got invested in their bond during TLJ. How they were trying to figure each other out, and realized they were kindred spirits. How indignant Rey was on behalf of Ben when she thought Luke had tried to kill him. How heartbroken she was when he wouldn’t turn back to the light - and Ben’s equal desperation for her to turn Dark. That scene in the elevator, where Rey uses his name for the first time? More romantic tension in that one scene then between Anakin and Padme across all three prequels, if you ask me. 

TROS fortunately didn’t abandon this like it abandoned so much else of TLJ’s contributions (Cough cough, Rose, cough.) and while I think the writing was overall weaker, there were some really sweet moments nonetheless. Rey healing Ben and basically telling him that his loyalty to the Dark Side is all that’s stopping them from being together. The way they perfect the Dyad by the end so Rey can pass Ben the lightsaber. Hell, the concept of the Dyad in general. I am more frustrated than you can imagine that Ben had no lines following his turn back to the light, but I don’t care what people say - their kiss wasn’t cringe, that moment was earned. At least in my opinion. 

But hey, it’s just a ship, and it features a rather divisive character, so there’s no reason anyone has to want anything to do with it.

[greenygreenland]

perfect: rex x jedi! reader

-captain (or should I say commander) Rex x reader -romanceeeee and fluff to help you recover from s7ep11 -you are Jedi (recently knighted)

Whenever (Y/n) was around that damned clone, her stomach churned and her chest burned. Captain Rex was a solid man, unwavering in the face of danger unless Anakin or (Y/n) threw him into the air. Only then would he let loose his composure. He was kind, caring, and strong, which was why he earned the respect of everyone in the Grand Republic Army. 

Everyone except you. 

The first time you met him, you knew you were in trouble. He swept you off your feet with that smile, made you laugh from the shadows with his awkwardness when he was out of his comfort zone, and most importantly, made you so, so happy. You didn’t understand these feelings at first and began to hate them. Why did he have to be so kriffing perfect? 

And so you turned that joy to hatred because you were afraid to stray from the Jedi Code. His warm smiles you hated. His honey-sweet eyes you also hated. His handsomeness, and and his lovely figure? You also hated. He was so perfect. Too perfect.

“Is something...wrong General?” You looked up into those honey eyes of the boy you loved. He was worried. Your brows knitted as you pulled your robes closer. It was cold today, but that was probably because the sun had long set over the horizon. You shook your head with a frown. That bubbling anger in your heart was there again, gnawing at your insides, twisting in your stomach. 

“Nothing.” you quietly answered. Clenching a fist, you curtly turned on your heel and marched over to Anakin’s side. He was a close friend of yours you met as a Padawan. He knew you well, so perhaps he’d know what to do. 

Anakin sensed you before he saw you. “What’s wrong?” he inquired. You took a seat at his side by the fire. A few of his men, Fives, Echo, and his padawan Ahsoka, sat around it in a semi-circle. With a shrug, you rested your cheek in your palm. “Nothing.” Anakin snorted.��“That’s what you always say.” he said. Ahsoka nodded in agreement. “He’s not wrong.” 

Your gaze averted to Rex, who stood by the ship chatting with a few of his men. A sigh escaped your lips and Anakin cheerily laughed. “You like him?” Your head snapped around to face Anakin. “What? No! I hate--dislike him!” I exclaimed. My cheeks felt warm, but I dismissed it as an affect of the warm fire. “Besides, Jedi can’t have attachments, Ani.” I added, giving him a pointed look. Anakin raised his arms in defense, not long after sending his men a mischievous glance.

They began to chuckle to themselves, their eyes sparkly. “So the General has the hots for the Captain?” Fives loudly questioned. You sighed with a roll of your eyes, causing Ahsoka to smirk. “I’d say you only ‘hate’ Rex because you’re worried about your feelings.” 

In this moment, there were no generals, no clones, and no Jedi. You were all talking as friends.

“And what if I like him?” you suddenly stated. “He’s just so...so perfect for no reason! It makes my heart beat fast and my hands go sweaty--I hate it! He shouldn’t make me feel this way.” Anakin patted your shoulder. “As Obi-wan says, it’s natural to feel this way, but we can’t allow it to cloud our judgement. As I say, why should that matter? Go get him!” 

“Only General Skywalker would say something like that.” Jesse announced. Echo laughed. “He’s one of a kind.” 

“And so is Rex. Perfect too.” you dreamily blurted. Everyone collectively smirked. Their eyes averted to something behind you and you turned to see what they were looking at. “What--Rex!” you squeaked. The captain adjusted his grip on his helmet, eyes as wide as dinner plates. “You-you think I’m perfect?” 

The boys and Jedi were grinned as you blinked several times. This wasn’t happening, you told yourself. You hated this man and that would only continue. But as you slowly met the boy’s honey-sweet eyes and nervous smile, you melted. You couldn’t deny what your heart told you any longer. 

“Yes. I think you’re perfect.”

Rex looked taken a-back yet extremely happy. You sensed the joy spike in his aura and the relief. “I-I like you a lot Rex.” you slowly said. He glanced behind you at the boys and Jedi, who all nodded and gave him a thumbs-up. 

“Well, I like you too General. But not as a friend, as a...” He didn’t finish, because Fives and Echo let out loud whoops of joy. 

“GO GET SOME REX!”

“YEAH! FINALLY! TOOK YOU TWO LONG ENOUGH!”

“Shut up you two!”

You started at the boys in bewilderment. “You guys...knew?” Jesse snorted in reply. “’Course we knew. The amount of times you two snuck glances at each other was exhileratin’. You have no idea how long we’ve all been waiting for this.”

“KISS ALREADY!”

“Shut up Echo!”

And so you did. You were quick to give him a peck on the cheek with a red face. “Promise not to tell anyone?” you cautiously announced. Everyone nodded. “Our lips are sealed.” Ahsoka said. Anakin nodded. “And so are mine.” 

“Mine too!”

“And mine!”

“And mine!”

[wonderlandleighleigh]

Jedi of the Dune Sea pt 5

“We...we did it.” 

It’s a bitter pill to swallow, but one Anakin has known was a possibility for a long time now.

It’s a scene that’s played in his head over and over and over again. 

Obi-Wan is cradling the other Anakin in his arms, heartbreak written all over his face. What remains of Sheev Palpetine lays in a heap on the temple floor ahead of them.

“Yes, yes, we did,” Obi-Wan says, his voice shaky in a way that Anakin doesn’t remember ever hearing before. 

“Did I…” the other Anakin coughs, and it wracks his broken body. “Did I make you proud, Master?” 

“Yes,” Obi-Wan tells him. “Very proud, Anakin.” 

“I...I wish-” he breathes hard. “Wish I could stay...I’m sorry, Master.” 

“No, no apologies, Anakin,” Kenobi says quickly. “You’ve nothing- Everything is going to be alright.” 

The other man’s face contorts in pain and anguish. “I don’t want to leave you ‘lone…” 

“I will be fine,” Obi-Wan promises, tears brimming in his eyes. “And so will you. The Force will look after you now, little brother.” 

Anakin can feel his other self’s presence growing weaker...fading into the Force. 

“Obi-Wan…” he managed. “Tell...tell Padme….tell her she was always my Angel…” 

He stands there, watching himself die as Obi-Wan holds him close. 

It occurs to Anakin that no one else has thought about this; has considered that when Sidious shows up again, it will take everything the Chosen One has to defeat him. If they have, no one has said anything.

Maybe he’ll finally die. 

“Is that what you want?” 

It’s another guide, but that’s Padme’s voice and Anakin has to close his eyes against the feelings that well up inside of him at the sound of it.

“No,” he says, turning to face her.

“Is that a lie?” the Guide asks. 

He blows out a breath and looks back down at his other self’s body, cold and ghostly white; limp in Obi-Wan’s arms. “Sometimes.” 

“Anakin Skywalker,” the Guide says. “The great Jedi General, who has fought and bled and killed for the galaxy. Who hatched a dangerous plan to weed out a Sith Lord in the Galactic Senate.” 

Anakin huffs out a wry laugh. 

“Anakin Skywalker who is still that dusty little slave boy from nowhere special who loved to make things and take care of his mother,” the Guide finishes. 

Silence blankets them as he says nothing. 

“You became who you had to be. To become a Jedi. To fight a war. But there is nothing wrong with wanting to be that dusty little boy,” She looks up at him and smiles. “Maybe if you find him again, you won’t want to die so often.” 

Anakin gazes at her for a long moment before turning back to find that his other self has faded away, leaving Obi-Wan nothing but an outer robe to cling to. 

Feeling his master's pain is difficult and he squeezes his eyes shut against it. When he opens them again, he's back in the circular room, his own tears dampening his cheeks. 

He looks up when the Temple Guardian settles on his knees in front of him. 

Anakin wipes his eyes with a sleep and takes a breath. “What happened to the Jedi who were here? Why is there no one besides you?” 

The Guardian looks sad, suddenly. “Dead, mostly. Some just...left.” 

“Why?” 

“You know,” the Guardian says. “Most of the Jedi here were like you. They used to be slaves, but were set free to become Jedi here. And for a while, they were content to learn the ways of the Force...the live by the Jedi code…” 

“But?” 

“But...the code turned out to be just another slavemaster. Something else telling them how to act. How to think. What they could and could not do.” 

Anakin looks away.

“Many fell to the Dark Side,” the Guardian goes on. “They killed each other in some cases, blinded by rage and fear of being enslaved once more. Some just...decided to go. They left their lightsabers behind and we never saw them again.” 

“Because of the code.” 

“They weren’t allowed to love,” the Guardian explains. “For people who had been told all their lives that they weren’t allowed to be people. To own land. To get married. To hold real jobs. It was just too much.” 

“But...but then why haven’t I gone to the Dark Side?” Anakin asks, looking confused. 

“Because you do not follow the code,” the Guardian says with an amused look on his face. 

“Yes...yes I do,” Anakin says quickly. “I...I do. I…” 

The Guardian chuckles softly. “My brother, you may not admit to breaking the code, but you love deeply. I sense it as clear as day. The guides of other Jedi who have come here are strangers to them. People they don’t remember ever meeting before. But you...your guides take the form of those you love most. Your master. Your Padawan. The woman you adore. Each time you support them...save their lives...think fondly on them. You are giving into attachment.” 

Anakin swallows. “Then I have failed as a Jedi.” 

“Have you?” the Guardian asks. “It seems to me that you’ve done quite well as a Jedi. You just cannot bear to be a slave again.” 

"But I want so much more than I have...the Council's respect...my Master's approval...my Padawan back...Padme...how can I possibly continue to be  Jedi when i can't help craving these things?"

The Guardian smiles kindly. "The difference between Darkness and Light is simple: the Dark Side craves those things and then takes them. No matter the cost. No matter what evil they have to commit to get them."

"And the Light?"

"Asks for what they want. Accepts it when they're told no. And then tries to earn a yes."

Anakin thinks about that; about how balanced and simple it seems. 

"No feeling is final, until your last breath," the Guardian says gently. "And you don't have to suffer the way our brothers and sisters did. Freedom is not beyond your reach. But what that looks like is entirely up to you."

Anakin closes his eyes, letting the words settle in his belly. 

When he opens them again, the Guardian is gone, and the last door is lit up.