#and everything being rehashed does make me a bit upset again

[georgespaniel]

i do worry lads that this is getting a tiny bit too much for me

[televisionboy]

this gif is everything skdjdjfn and this is my first alphabet! so give me love and constructive criticism.

taglist: @punkgeekchic @visionsofsweettea @adoresobs @am4sawa @reblogsfandom @evarolines @somethingstuffy

Timothee Chalamet Fluff Alphabet

A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

Dates with Timothee are very very comforting and new at the same time. He LOVES getting out of the house and going to a city where shops are lining every corner and small cafes with coffee to die for. But he also loves to cook you dinner and rehash your days. He’s quite a domestic person.

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

Timothee finds all of you attractive. But his favorite thing to do is whenever you’re reading a book or the two of you are watching TV, and you’re at one end of the couch and he’s at the other end, he loves to run his hands up and down your legs while they rest in his lap. Drumming his fingers against your knees is like a calming thing

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

He doesn’t talk, at all. He’s an incredibly patient boyfriend who will sit there with you and sync your breathing while hugging you. He will listen for hours and hours to you talk about it. And if not, he makes tea for you and offers cuddles and comfortable silences. I mean, either way he always makes tea.

D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

He would love a family with you, he knows you’d be an incredible parent to his children. But he’s content being young, having new experiences and getting to be spontaneous. If he had to think about it, he’d like one or two children and maybe a dog. Living in a cozy but spacious home, of course there’s a pool in the back.

E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

well, when he’s in the mood, jealous/mad he definitely will be dominant (and especially in bed) but he’s in no way so dominant that you will feel like his maid or a child. But he really doesn’t want to consider your relationship to be that way. Both of you are just you and treat each other equally. 

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

He gets cold when he’s fighting with you. Timothee’s a bit like a younger sibling while fighting, he knows how to push your buttons and won’t stop until he see’s a reaction. But he has that guilty feeling wash over him so fast. He’s very very easy to forgive you because how could he say no to someone like you??

G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

SO GRATEFUL. He spoils like no other. If you point out that you like a pair of earrings, they’re yours (it doesn’t matter that they’re pure diamonds) you mentioned that you want to see Italy? Tickets booked. And a great thing about him, on top of being a good listener is that he has a great eye. And he picks up on things and is quick to notice them. Which is a big reason he’s so successful in acting. Even if it’s something as simple as washing the dishes so he can relax, to something as kind as making him your very own fan gift.. he melts every time.

H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

Mmm, he certainly tries not to but everyone keeps secrets. There are things that both of you prefer to keep private but he wouldn’t keep something like him kissing another woman a secret.

I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

You’ve inspired him and fueled him to become a stronger actor even if you’re not one yourself. Some of your advice is seriously helpful, and some are unhelpful but hilarious. No matter what you will tell him, he knows you’re waiting at home or even at his set with open arms, waiting for him to win an award and fangirl online to other Timmy fans. It makes him blush and cause a billion butterflies to erupt in his stomach.

J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

He trusts you 100% that you would never leave him, and he doesn’t want to be one of those boyfriends who restricts their partner. But there’s a part of him that’s incredibly insecure and is convinced you can do better. There are some parts that WANT you to leave him and do better. He would never ever show it in public, but you can read him well. You’ll put a hand on his bouncing knee and kiss his jaw.

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like? 

He knows he’s a damn good kisser as well as charmer. You had been on a couple of dates with him, on one you mentioned that it was on your bucket list to be kissed in the rain. He made sure to schedule a date when there would be rain and he took you on a picnic. Towards the end, it had started to pour and you were trying to run back to the car but he grabbed your face and kissed you so hard but so passionately. His curls were dripping and the sandwiches were ruined but the feeling was incredible. 

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

Rightttt after that kiss, in the car you were drying off and laughing with him while the radio was on in the background. The car was on but he wasn’t driving. Instead, he turned to you and told you he was in love with you. Both of you had said “love you” but never “i’m in love with you”

M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

He’s on the fence about babies but he knows for certain that he wants to marry you. You know that scene in The Office where Jim shows the engagement ring for Pam and is like “I got it 3 weeks into dating”? That’s Timmy. 

He brings you to a premire of one of his movies and at the end when all the credit’s are rolling, it says “y/n will you marry me?” and when you turn back around, Timmy is on one knee and Armie is most likely behind him crying his eyes out. 

N icknames - What do they call their s/o?

“Babe” “Baby” “Mon cherie” When you two are married, he’ll join you in the kitchen while cooking dinner and call you “Mrs Chalamet” before kissing your shoulder and beginning to chop veggies. It’s just incredibly domestic 

O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

so so so obvious and so in love. He shows you off as much as possible and talks about you on talk shows until he’s sure that the audience is annoyed and SNL mocks him (and even then, he’ll continue)

P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

he brags but he does know when to dial it back for your own privacy and humility. BUT that doesn’t mean he won’t hold your hand in public, or banter with you on a twitter thread even if you both are right next to each other on the couch playing footsie

Q uirk - Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.

He has a great eye and is quick to pick up on things. It’s almost as if he has certain senses and can tell when you’re having a bad day or upset. He just knows. It’s incredible. He’ll run you a bath and order cake to indulge yourself in before you even get home.

R omance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?

The most sickley, fluffy, romantic, boyfriend that it makes me sick. Timothee would dye his hair rainbow and cut of his toes if it meant you would smile. On a more romantic note, he pulls out all the stops but it’s a bit more subtle?? Like he is very romantic but it’s not overwhelming. There’s no string quartet and private dining room but there will be jazz and dancing at midnight or a homemade “restaurant” with Timothee as a one man (messy) staff but it’s the best thing you could have ever come home to

S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

He’s your head cheerleader and the most selfless human ever. Will cheer for you until his voice goes mute and even then, he’s the one clapping the loudest and crying the most. 

T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

both! Timothee is like a dog in some ways. He’s energetic and needs new things, to be outside, to be social. But he craves hugs and cuddling, he adores late night talks with you or watching you make him breakfast while he scrolls through Instagram. Like I said, a very domestic guy.

U nderstanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

He know’s you like the back of his hand and he could spot you with his eyes closed and only by feeling your face. He knows your habits, and the food you hate, your terrible cooking skills, and the kind of dad jokes you tell, the anxiety ticks, and what shows you’ll watch over and over again.

V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

He’d go insane without you. You’re addictive because you have a pure heart and a dirty mind and he falls in love the more you show that. He brings you back the weirdest things that remind him of you. Stationary cards with odd quotes, an antique necklace from the 40′s, peach earrings (because he enables your teasing)

W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.

He’s like the real version of “JOEY DOESN’T SHARE FOOD” but a little more loving lol “I love you, but I’m willing to defend my fries”

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

I said that he’s like a puppy! he needs kisses and scratches to his head (free scalp massage) and he’s a clingy puppy too. i mean, look at his eyes for the love of god. 

Y earning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

he aches so bad. He is your cheerleader but he can’t function without you. You’re his cup of coffee, an antidepressant. He’s fangirling inside for your new project but when he sees your mug or reaches to bring you close to his chest and you’re not there, he’s unable to fall asleep or make a cup of coffee.

Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

He’d travel to Mars and back if you asked him to. Just ask him, and he does it. One time, he was working on a movie with an actress who was quite snippy to you and he quit immediately, feeling incredibly guilty and nauseous. He got you very  expensive lox and bagels one morning because you were whining about it the previous night. He doesn’t want to close his eyes at night because there’s so many things he wants to do before he goes on to the next day. But when he closes his eyes at night, it’s all you, you, you, you, you and how much he’s overwhelmed with total adoration for you

[plus-size-reader]

The Only Saviors Left Alive

Negan x Plus size!reader

Word Count: 2124 words

Warnings: none

Summary: Negan goes back to the sanctuary and finds a whole lot more than he expects to

—————————————————————————————————

“It’s been a hell of a long time since I’ve seen you”

Negan stopped, of course, unsure of where your voice was coming from but the most confusing part was that he recognized it.

He would have known your voice anywhere but he certainly never thought he'd hear it again.

After all this time, Negan thought for sure that you were dead.

As best he could tell, there was nothing left of any of his life before. The sanctuary was in ruins, all your people were gone. He’d had to learn just how different it was the hard way today.

“What happened here?” he called, still unsure where you were. Negan hoped you would come out but whether you did or not, none of this made any sense.

This whole thing was a mess.

No one knew that better than you did.

Negan didn’t, not really, bit after how everything had gone down but you couldn’t exactly blame him for that. It wasn’t particularly his fault, of course, it was mostly his fault but not all his fault.

“Rick wanted to bring the groups together, but that never really included us” you started, thinking back to those first few months after his capture.

He wanted a better world, but no one could get over what had happened. They couldn’t get over the hate and resentment they had for the saviors. You were sure that some of them made it work but to your knowledge, most of them were dead.

Without Negan, they didn’t have anywhere to go or anyone looking after them.

They had been stupid, thinking the world would work in their favor, you didn’t believe it for a second.

That was why you were still here.

These walls were your home and as shitty as it was right now, it was always going to be your home. It was where you belonged, and the fact that you were alone wasn’t going to change that.

“Yeah, I figured that might happen” he shrugged, trying to figure out where you were by the way your voice bounced off the walls.

He desperately wanted to see you, after all this time, but you weren’t coming out. Obviously, you didn't want to and really, he wasn’t sure that he could blame you.

Negan wasn’t blind, clearly a lot of his actions had gotten you both here.

“Most of them are dead, I guess. Sometimes Jed and the others come by but it's been a long time since I’ve seen them” you explained, thinking over each word carefully.

So much had happened since he’d been gone, it was hard to sum it all up now. You weren’t in the mood to rehash the collapsing of this place.

Negan was relieved, in part, to know that at least some of those sorry assholes wouldn’t leave you alone in all this. He should have known none of the others would

...And you sure as hell wouldn’t leave.

You had always been as stubborn as a mule.

“I bet you didn’t expect a visit from me then, huh sugar?” he teased, flipping over one of the stools to sit on. You were still nowhere to be found but he hoped at some point that you would come down.

It wasn’t like he was just going to leave now that he knew you were here. There was a better chance of hell freezing over.

“No, really I figured you went out and got yourself killed” your voice sounded different this time when it reached his ears. Your footsteps reached his ears later than your voice as you walked down the steel steps.

In all honesty, you weren’t really prepared for what you were doing, or what would happen when you saw him again after all this time, but you knew it had to be done. You couldn’t hide from Negan, not anymore.

There was a time when you were inseparable, the only two people at the top of the world, but now you were together again at the bottom of the barrel. It was far from ideal, but that was just how it was.

You couldn’t do anything about it.

The saviors were long gone, dead you assumed, and everything you had once held dear was gone too. There was nothing else for you, and yet, you didn’t dare leave this place.

It was the only place in the world you felt safe. You knew how stupid that was and how out of your depth you were but the sanctuary was where you had lived for so long, it was all you had.

Negan must have felt that way too, because he wouldn’t have come if he didn’t.

“I missed you, ya know that don’t you?” he sighed, gingerly wiping the sweat from his brow bone. Your movements and his were deafening, the only thing that could be heard throughout the stark and desolate compound.

If you strained your ears, you may have caught a bit of groaning outside the walls from the dead, but nothing more than that. The sound of your breath leaving your lungs was all you could focus on as you walked, and that was more than enough.

You were nervous.

It was stupid, perhaps more stupid than your being here at all, but when you really stopped to think about it, you had missed Negan.

For some time, you even thought that Rick killed him, until you got news that wasn’t the case. Some of the saviors moved to help him build his bridge, doing all they could to survive, but you didn’t bother to leave.

You rarely dealt with anyone other than the saviors at all, even after that day in the field. The saviors were your people, they were yours to look after, and even if there were no survivors left, you were still going to be here.

It just didn’t seem like a good idea to go anywhere else.

You had never been anywhere other than the sanctuary, you had never been anything more than a savior, than one of Negan’s wives. On the rare occasion that any saviors managed to make it in any of the other communities, you weren’t going to be one of them.

They would sooner kill you.

“I’m sure. You’ve had more than enough time to think,  locked up in a cage like an animal” you scoffed, finally rounding the corner to the floor, making eye contact with the man you loved for the first time.

It was strange.

There was a time where you wouldn’t have been anywhere other than his side, when you would have died for him, but for whatever reason, you felt different now. Perhaps it was all that had changed, or all the time between now and then.

One thing was for sure, whatever it was, you weren’t a fan.

Negan had provided you with support, stability, and love in all the years that you had been together but lately, you had done that for yourself. It forced you to wonder what you had been so confident in for so long, and why you had been so ready to die for him?

For so long, he was practically a God for you and saviors, but that man was long gone.

“You look like shit”

You didn’t even hesitate to comment, though admittedly the words slipped from your lips before you thought them over. It was true, all those years he’d been locked up had clearly taken their toll, and he had changed quite a bit.

Not that he wasn’t as attractive as he always was, he was just different.

“Damn baby, that’s a hell of a welcome home” Negan scoffed, not even batting an eye at your crude nature. It was something that he had always admired about you and something that was more okay now.

He’d missed your smart mouth and attitude, if he was being honest with himself.

“Does this look like our home?” you questioned, sitting down across from him just hidden from view by a shadow cast from the broken window. It left a smattering of light between you on the concrete floor but you ignored it.

Right now, you had much more pressing matters to worry about.

As far as you understood, Negan was never supposed to get out of that little box they put him in. After all, Michonne made it clear to you that you were lucky they didn’t send Negan’s head to you in a box, like they were doing you a favor in even keeping him alive.

It had been another source of contention between you and the Alexandrians from the start, but you couldn’t change the fact that they had the upper hand. Those first few months, you had to worry much more about feeding your people than getting Negan out of there.

Besides, part of you was angry with him, resentful that he had done this in the first place.

The sanctuary was at the top before getting involved with Rick and the Alexandrians. You had everything you had ever wanted and the entire compound was working just as it was designed and then, in the blink of an eye, it was gone.

It was all gone because of his ego.

He took every exchange between him and Rick as a game, as a chance to flaunt his power and influence instead of just going about business as you always had. If he had only listened to you, your lover would have never been locked away in the first place.

Naturally, you were a little bitter about it now.

Look at where you were.

“I’ll give you that, this place really went to hell huh?” he shrugged, surveying all that was left of the palace the two of you had built. Now it was little more than the ruins of what it was, a reminder of those who had lived there

...Just like every other bar, house, and building for hundreds of miles.

“Yeah, sorry about that honey, I didn’t have time to clean up before you got here” Negan could hardly make out the details of your face in the dim shadows but he knew you well enough to know that an eye roll came with that.

That attitude clearly hadn’t gone anywhere in all these months.

“Are you upset with me, sweetheart? Trouble in paradise?” he allowed, shooting back at you with just as much attitude as you were bringing to the table. All this time between you had caused quite a bit of turmoil between you, things that needed to be addressed, but there was no use in that.

It wouldn’t change anything.

“I didn’t want to leave you there, you know? I tried to get you back but we were outnumbered. We didn’t have guns or men or food to feed those men, we didn’t have anything” you sighed, doing your very best to keep from getting emotional.

It had been so hard for so long, and in the end, you lost, more than anyone else. Nothing you tried to do was enough, you couldn’t get Negan back, and all your people were dead. Obviously, you weren’t as good a leader as he was.

Maybe if you had been, you wouldn’t be sitting here on a concrete brick, turned over in a few inches of water.

“Turns out, a kingdom tends to fall without the king who built it. Nobody told me that” you grumbled, folding your arms across your chest. You weren’t mad, not anymore, but it was proving more difficult than you assumed to see him again.

This morning, you assumed that you would never see him again in your life, just like you did every other morning for the past few years. That was the only thing you had anymore, and now you had nothing at all.

It sucked.

“Hey, this isn’t your fault. You could have never known how it would go down” he tried, but you had already heard enough. Negan may have been gone, but his schtick was the same as it ever was.

This was just the way he was, trying to make you feel better even when you clearly had no hope at all, and finding a way to blame anything else even when you were fully at fault. He thought he could protect you from the world, but that wasn’t the case anymore.

That hadn’t been the case in a long time.

“Maybe not, but that doesn’t change the fact that you and I are the only Saviors left alive” you hummed, looking around the large compound as you spoke, your words echoing around you with a finality that caught you off guard.

There was no going back now.

[flames-bring-a-ton-of-ash]

Irresistible Danger - Part 59

Synopsis:  After being caught outside the compound on your own, Negan decides to punish you in the best way possible ;)

Words: 4,078

Warnings: nsfw, smut, swearing

ID Masterlist can be found HERE

Masterlist of all my fics can be found HERE

*HIATUS WARNING*

This will be my last chapter update until the end of July or very beginning of August, due to me joining Camp Nano. If people are interested, I can link my nano page HERE if you want to see what progress I make. I haven’t created a Camp project goal yet, but I’ll be adding it soon. 

Clearing the Board

You stared at Negan in shock for a long moment, your brain’s frantic whirring grinding to a screeching halt as the subconscious watched with mouth so agape that the gum it had been chewing fell unnoticed to the floor. 

Had he been thinking the same questions as you the entire dinner? Part of you wanted to bolt, terrified to know what was on his mind. Was this where he pulled the rug out from under you and said things were getting too cozy, that he wanted to back track? Did he want to go back to his wives? Or maybe he wanted to try and make you into another one of them? 

Breathe. Just breathe and see what he has to say, before you start hyperventilating. 

Clearing your throat and licking suddenly dry lips, you hoarsely said, “Uh...yeah...we do.” 

As if this was the permission he was waiting for, he gave a curt nod and started talking. He was so focused and straight to the point that you wondered if he had rehearsed this prior to you showing up. If so, he had done a much better job of preparing than you had. 

“I wanted to apologize for last night. Not just for the way I attacked you, though I do fucking apologize for that, but for how I acted after.”

At this, he paused and ran a hand slowly down over his mouth and beard, and you realized how difficult this conversation was for him, how much he still struggled to be open and honest and sincere with another human when he’d had to learn the hard way to be tough and mean and impenetrable. It made you feel validated regarding your own struggles, as well as grateful that both of you were stepping outside your comfort zones and trying to communicate. 

“Doll, there’s just some shit that I don’t like to fucking relive. It has to happen, whether I fucking want it to or not, and once it’s done, it’s done. I don’t always want to rehash events, or talk about how I feel, because the answer is probably that I feel like fucking horse shit. It’s nothing personal against you, it’s just me wanting to fucking move on. The same way you told me the other night that I gotta trust you not to always give me all the fucking details? Well, same goes when the shoe’s on the other fucking foot.”

You sat there and took this in, brain having pulled out a tablet to take frantic notes, and subconscious still staring in shock with its foot unknowingly stepping right in the middle of the dropped gum wad. Of all the ways for tonight’s conversation to go, no part of you had expected Negan to not only take the lead, but go in the correct direction needed to pulverize one of the newly-created questions you had thrown into the padlocked box. 

Once he said the words out loud, it did make a lot of sense. You had seen it as wanting to connect with him and support him, if he would just explain what had happened on the run to upset him. However, some things might be better left unsaid, so as not to make the person relive the events and the emotions tied to them. What you had seen as him shutting you down was actually him trying to move on from unsavory events (and actions he’d had to complete in his role as leader). Add to that his comparison to your conversation the other night, where you had expected him to be okay with you not giving all details about certain events, and you couldn’t believe how much you had blown his recent actions out of proportion.

You had been quiet for a few long moments, during which he was watching you closely. He tried to make his expression neutral, but the unnatural stillness of his tensed body and the focused intensity of his hazel gaze gave away how much weight he was putting on what your response might be.

 Picking your words carefully, you broke the silence. “Thank you for explaining that, because I did wonder why you turned down my offer to talk last night. I respect your right to not tell me everything about what you have to do in order to keep control of the Sanctuary and other communities. However,” you held his gaze, making sure he saw your sincerity. “I want you to know that I’m always here for when and if you do want to talk about it. Any of it.” 

He was unresponsive for a few seconds, as if the tables had turned and now he was the one a bit surprised at how calm and clearly you had voiced your agreement. Then, a soft smile broke across his face, and he said, “I know you are, doll.”

You gave a small smile, beyond relieved to have that topic discussed and out of the way. Your brain was proud of the two of you for talking it out, while the subconscious was preoccupied with cursing and hopping around on one foot while frantically trying to use a stick to scrape the smeared gum off the bottom of its shoe. Like it, you now flailed about for how to move on to other concerns. The door of communication had been opened, and you didn’t want him to slam it shut now that the thing he’d wanted to get off his chest was done. 

“There’s some other things I think we need to talk about,” you said. When his eyebrows raised in a nonverbal for you to continue, you started nervously fidgeting with your dinner napkin.

Shit, where did you even start? How to accurately say what you were thinking and feeling about this relationship with him. He had obviously noticed you pulling back that day in the woods, and while you had been quick to start blurting your feelings when in a post-orgasmic haze, the words now stuck in your throat and refused to come out. 

That ball of self-doubt was creeping in, telling you to shut the box back up and get out of there. It whispered how maybe now that Negan had fucked you, the “game” was almost over and he wouldn’t be as interested. That the moment you started placing expectations on the two of you, he’d tell you to leave his rooms and not come back. 

Looking down at the napkin, which was now twisted and crumpled from anxious hands, you tossed it down on the table and abruptly stood up, unable to continue the farce of sitting still. You pushed the chair into the table and stood there for a few seconds before giving a frustrated groan and pacing over to his armoire and back. 

It was quite the role reversal, you pacing back and forth while he sat there, silently watching. Your hands gestured wildly in front of you, as if trying to act out what you couldn’t say. You started to talk a few times, but it came out as a sputter of nothingness, causing you to pace back and forth yet again. After a couple rounds of this, you finally stopped behind the dinner chair, hands gripping the back of it until your knuckles turned white. The two of you stared at one another, his forehead furrowed in concern at your mini meltdown.

“Doll,” he said, voice low and calming. “Tell me.” 

Just say it. Tell him you’ve fallen for him. 

But you couldn’t. The emotions were right there, but it didn’t feel right to just blurt them out. Three little words that some people tossed around like pennies, and you couldn’t say them when it mattered. 

You looked at him desperately, willing him to throw a lifeline and take back over the conversation, to tell you to forget it and act like this moment had never happened. Instead, he finally moved into action, standing from his own chair and rounding the small table to stand in front of you. 

He didn’t reach out, didn’t try to hold you, as if he knew that the slightest touch would cause your taut as a bowstring form to burst into a million pieces. His hands instead clenched at his sides in a nonverbal show of restraint. He knew that whatever you were struggling with was important, while at the same time realizing he couldn’t force it, and that the direction of the conversation depended entirely on you. 

“Tell me what’s wrong.” 

There was more authority to his tone this time, but it was the slight hint of worry making it go up in pitch at the end that propelled your own voice to finally get its shit together and start working. 

“There’s nothing wrong, I just…I don’t know how to say it.”

“Fucking say what? You’re killing me here, doll.” 

You looked at him, took in this strong and seemingly impenetrable, yet surprisingly caring and passionate man who had shattered all of the emotional defenses you had strategically built in order to keep yourself safe. And suddenly, you knew exactly how to tell him in a way that he, and only he, would understand. 

“Remember when you said that the game is over when the king is captured?”

Surprise flickered in his gaze, as he obviously wasn’t expecting that to come out of your mouth. However, he quickly caught up, giving a curt nod. 

“I know technically the queen is expendable, and the game can continue on without her, but-” voice cracking a bit, you paused to take a deep breath before continuing. “What the hell does one do when the opposite happens?” 

You saw the moment the realization hit, making him go completely still. Saw the moment he pieced everything together but still held back, as if afraid maybe he was misinterpreting it. 

His face looked wrecked when he husked, “What are you saying, doll?”

Emotion welled in your eyes as you verbally let go, whispering the confession that had been held in for long enough. 

“The king’s captured me.”

He broke the physical distance then, his eyes bright with emotion as he wrapped one arm around your waist and cupped your face with a warm palm. Leaning down, he placed a kiss on your lips that was so soft and gentle you almost wanted to cry. When he lifted his head, you felt overwhelmed by the adoration in his gaze, but that was nothing compared to the words he then spoke.

“Well doll, I’d say that’s only fucking fair, since the queen’s captured me too.”

Shock coursed through you, followed by a rush of emotion so strong it would’ve knocked you on your ass if he wasn’t there to clutch onto. 

He feels the same! Holy fuck, not only did he understand, but he also feels the same!

The two of you kissed again, long and slow, until your surroundings faded away and there was only him. It could’ve been mere moments or long minutes before your lips parted from his, as time currently had no meaning outside the count of his breaths on your face and beat of his heart under your palm flattened on his chest. 

You felt dizzyingly happy, and the padlocked box was tons of pounds lighter. However, there were still a few spiky balls of questions sitting in the bottom of it, and it was time to empty them out. All of them. 

“So,” you said, fingers tracing up over his exposed collarbone and strong throat. “What happens next, after the king and queen capture each other?”

Giving a much softer version of his usual devilish smirk, he replied, “They lay down their weapons, recall their fucking armies, and rule the board together.” 

Grinning like a fool at that, you wound your arms up around his neck and murmured hesitantly, “So what does that mean for the others? What does the king do with the five of them?”

Once again, the metaphor was not lost on him, and you felt the slightest stiffening of his body against yours as he pulled his lips from where they had been tracing along your ear lobe and looked down at you. 

Shit, did you go too far? Maybe you should’ve just stopped while you were ahead and not crossed into that topic of conversation just yet…

“What do you want me to do with them, doll?” 

You definitely weren’t expecting that as a response, as shown by your staring blankly up at him for a few seconds before saying, ���Isn’t that your choice?”

He gave an amused tsk of disapproval. “No, that’s not how it works when we both rule the board. Each partner gets a say, and then we figure it out together.”

Did he just...call you… “Is that what I am?” you asked, heart inflating like a bubble at the possibility. 

“I mean, we can stick with just calling you my queen, if that’s what you want, but I think partner also has a nice fucking ring to it.” 

His partner. Not his wife, or girlfriend. Partner. 

Stretching up to give him a kiss of approval, you said, “Partner is perfect.” 

Deciding to go all in, you added, “And I only want you, no one else. I want you to be the person I snuggle up against each night, and the one whose bed I wake up in each morning knowing that I belong there. I want to walk proudly beside you and know that you’re mine, as much as I’m yours.” You hesitated, a small dart of worry at the brutally honest words making you feel the need to ask, “But what do you want?”

The playful light was back in his eyes, that sinful tongue running over his bottom lip. “I thought I already made that fucking obvious, doll. But if I didn’t, then listen very closely.” 

His lips traced over your face, leaving butterfly kisses on your cheeks and nose and forehead as he spoke the words. “I want you. Fucking simple as that. I’ve wanted you, and only you, since the day you fucking kicked my ass at chess.” 

This was technically information you already knew, thanks to Trixie, but hearing it from him made it that much more real. It was as if even though all the signs were there, you still didn’t want to fully believe you were the reason for his change in behavior with the wives, not until he confirmed it himself. 

Trying to add a bit of lightness, you hummed in pleasure at his lips kissing the sensitive spot on the curve of your neck and quipped, “Who knew all it would take was a game of chess for me to stand out.”

Giving a huffed laugh, he said against your skin, “If you think that’s the only way you fucking stand out, you’re even more oblivious then I fucking thought.” 

“Hey! Are you telling me I’m weird or something?” you laughed, playfully tugging at his hair so that he raised his head to look at you. 

“Wellllll…” he joked, smiling broadly before his expression got a bit more serious. “In all honesty, doll, I’ve respected the hell out of you since the moment you arrived here.”

Eyebrows raising, you said, “Oh? Do go on.”

His eyes danced with mirth, but his words were uncharacteristically sincere. “Despite being scared shitless when my men first found your little group, you never fully submitted or lost your fight. You marched right into the Sanctuary like you were gonna own the whole fucking place, or at least own the kitchen, which you did in a ridiculously short amount of fucking time, I might add. I felt like a fool for asking you to be another wife and expecting you’d be happy just sitting around looking pretty.”

You gave a haughty grin, but let him continue, knowing that confessions such as this were few and far between with Negan. And you were going to soak in every affectionate word like a desert does the rain, because as much as the actions and nonverbals fed your heart, his words were what now fed your soul. 

“I knew you’d be trouble the the first time I walked in the kitchen to check on things and you refused to fucking kneel with the others, staring me down in a way that said you were demanding to be treated at my equal, and just daring me to try and fucking do something about it. It was that same daring each time we were alone that drew me in like fucking catnip, and while the smart thing would’ve been to stay away, when I found you out in the fucking woods about to be walker chow and totally going against my orders, it gave me the perfect opportunity to force you closer. I knew I should stop sending for you, stop finding reasons to visit the kitchen or order you to bring me trays, but damn doll, you were too fucking exciting to walk away from.

“The day you beat me at chess, you were so fucking proud of yourself, and I realized that instead of being pissed, I was proud of you too. I knew I had a spitfire on my hands, and damn if that didn’t make my dick hard.” His voice lowered a bit, so that you held your breath in order not to miss a single word. “But it wasn’t until that first outing together in the woods, when you killed that walker and saved my fucking hide, that I realized I was done for. That I might as well throw down my crown because the king had been captured, and the game was over.”

You thought back to that day, to the kiss and the look in his eyes afterward. Had you known back then? Possibly, but you never would’ve admitted it to yourself, not at that point. You felt a lump start to form in your throat, eyes blinking rapidly in an effort not to tear up. And you would have succeeded, damn it, if not for his next words.

“I tried to fight it, to fight you. Hell I almost got you fucking killed by chasing you out of here, and all because of my own fucking stubborn pride. I’d never hated myself as much as I did in that moment, when we found you lying injured in the fucking woods. I’ve loved and lost, more than any man should, but...the thought of losing you was what almost ruined me.”

Tears trickled down your cheeks in cool rivulets. “Why didn’t you tell me?” you whispered. Hell, if you had known all of this a bit earlier, maybe you wouldn’t have hesitated to talk things out. Wouldn’t have held back as much as you did. 

Giving a self-deprecating smile, he said, “Because I’m a fucking idiot. But also because every time I considered it, you’d fucking pull away. I would’ve claimed you publicly as mine weeks ago, but you about had a god damn heart attack anytime there was a chance someone might see us getting fucking cozy together. I could practically hear the fears and doubts whirring around in your head the last few days, so I took the coward’s way out and tried to halt those thoughts by repeatedly fucking you any chance I got, until you were too exhausted to overthink.” 

He had meant the words to make you laugh, but instead you suddenly felt overwhelmed. Your stupid eyes wouldn’t stop watering, and if you weren’t careful your nose would start clogging up too. You had always been jealous as hell of women who could cry prettily, because you definitely weren’t one of them. 

You tried to school your features, tried to put on at least a thin mask of “I’m fine, totally fine” but more tears followed by a hiccuped sob escaping your lips said otherwise. You unwrapped your arms from his neck in order to press a hand to your mouth in an effort to try and stifle the emotions leaking out. 

“No,” he said, stern enough to jolt you out of the overanalyzing spiral your brain wanted to jump down. 

Pulling your hand away from your mouth with a gentle but firm grip, he clasped it between his own hands. “Don’t do that.”

“Do what?” you asked. 

Lifting one hand, he used his thumb to brush away the tear sitting stubbornly on the middle of your cheek. “Don’t do what you did last time. Don’t hide from me again.” 

Sighing, you nodded in agreement. “Fine, but it would be nice if one of these times it was you crying and not me.” 

Humor was a mask of its own, one both of you used to cover up emotions. However, since you were standing there with red-rimmed eyes and he had just verbally confessed his emotions more in the last few minutes than he probably had during the rest of the apocalypse combined, you both deserved a bit of humor. 

“The day that happens, I might as well just chop off my dick and fucking hand that over as well,” he joked back, causing you to smile and shove at him playfully. 

Giving an exasperated sigh, you said “I can’t believe I’ve been so dumb about all of this, thinking...well, assuming totally incorrect things. Guess that’s what I get for not trying to just talk it out.” 

He gave you a mock-stern expression and said, “Well, then let this be a fucking lesson.” He used two fingers to point at your eyes and then at his own, and back to yours. “Partners, remember.”

God, you loved the way that word rolled off his tongue. It was exactly what you had always secretly hoped to find with a man: an equal partnership. Sure, Negan was still the leader of the Sanctuary and had the role of badass motherfucker to uphold, but at the heart of things you stood on equal ground, and your thoughts and feelings and opinions mattered just as much as his own. Not to mention, you would dare him to deny that you were the leader of the kitchen staff. And hey, there was a lot of power in being the one in charge of making sure the entire community was fed. And the fact that he didn’t want to take any of that away from you, that he was proud of your accomplishments, made you fall for him even more. 

“Partners,” you agreed with a nod, running a hand up over his chest. Fingers traced his strong, masculine features before running up into his hair to map the streaks of salt among the pepper. 

Eyes brightening with desire, he stared with laser focus down at your mouth, his nostrils flaring as he watched your teeth subconsciously nibble on your lower lip as you took in this handsome man who was yours. All yours. Seeing the intent in his gaze and knowing where this was about to go by the sudden tensing of his muscles for action, you pressed your other hand against his chest lightly and said, “Wait, one more thing. I have a request.”

“Name it,” he said without hesitation.

“Um...this might seem a bit random, but is there any way you could bump Simon up to having a single room?” When Negan looked at you in slight bewilderment, you continued, “That way Ben can visit whenever he wants.”

His brows lowered, and you were afraid he was going to dismiss the issue as not important, so you pressed on. “In all honesty, it was Ben’s insistence that I be honest and talk things out with you that helped push me to say what I did tonight. I kinda owe him.”

The unspoken words were that Negan kinda owed him too, and his scowl said that he heard them loud and clear. With a slight huff, he grumbled, “I’ll see what I can fucking do.”

Giving a wide smile, you stood up on tiptoe and planted a very grateful kiss on his lips, with tongue included. Pulling back a bit, you whispered against his mouth, “I’d love to see what you can fucking do.”

At that, he scooped you up into his arms with a growl and strode into the bedroom, where he then proceeded to spend a good portion of the night showing you just how thoroughly captured the king really was.

~  ~  ~  ~  ~  ~  ~  ~  ~

Extra Author’s Note: Holy crap, was I nervous af to post this chapter. I feel like so much has been building to this conversation between You and Negan, and I wasn’t sure how readers were going to feel about it. I know some people were expecting more drama and angst, especially since this is about the time that romance novels usually throw in the so-called “third act conflict”. However, I personally find it pretty annoying when that conflict is some form of unneeded miscommunication or lack of communication, followed by the characters being apart for a period of time and then coming back together in one grand gesture before bam, an abrupt ending where you’re to expect them to live happily ever after with no more issues. 

Instead, I had You and Negan do that earlier in the fic, with the “Confrontation” chapter where they royally fucked up and had to stumble their way back together, followed later by the pregnancy test argument where they started to fuck up but then both broke their unhealthy fight cycle (You did this by walking away and Negan did it by going after her and deciding to actually listen). And now, with this chapter I wanted to showcase their growth and how they’ve learned enough from past mistakes to move forward. Some people might see this chapter as too fluffy, but I saw it as a way to show two grown ass adults finally laying down their emotional shields and communicating in an open and healthy manner. At this point, I thought Negan and You deserved that, and I hope y’all agree. 

Whether you loved it, hated it, didn’t care, all of the above, etc, please feel free to let me know. I’m so so curious to hear what people thought of this chapter, and if what I was hoping to showcase came across in a satisfying way. Thanks for reading! I’ll be back with more updates after Camp Nano! <3

[thinkingisadangerouspastime]

(pt 1) i really enjoy all your atla analyses & you've done a great job breaking down the usual arguments re how eip shows that kataang shouldn't have happened. i'm curious about your take on one specific argument that i just saw today, in an analysis of the show by a zker that was otherwise quite good and respectful (i know you've already talked about eip a lot, so no problem if you don't feel like rehashing). the premise: aang didn't just pressure katara in eip, he threatened her.

(pt 2) they point to when katara joins aang & asks if he’s alright: “aang: no, i’m not! i hate this play! katara: i know it’s upsetting, but it sounds like you’re overreacting. aang: overreacting? if i hadn’t blocked my chakra, i’d probably be in the avatar state right now!” the suggestion is he’s threatening her when he says ‘i’d probably be in the avatar state right now’ to describe his anger. i think this take exaggerates and oversimplifies it, but interested in your thoughts on it.

Hello my friend!! It is true I am Old inside and don’t like rehashing dhdlksjslks BUT your comments on my posts are always incredibly kind and insightful so I am more than willing to do a bit of rehashing for you 🥰 Besides! I’ve seen this general take before a few times and it’s always irked me for the exact reason you point out - it simultaneously exaggerates and oversimplifies the situation (and honestly that’s an impressive duality since it’s seemingly contradictory, so hats off to them lmaooo) - and now is as good a time as any to address it. So, for starters, let’s go ahead and get the excerpt they love to focus on so much:

Cut to Aang standing alone on a balcony. Katara enters and walks up to him.

Katara: Are you all right?

Aang: [Angered.] No, I’m not! I hate this play! [Yanks his hat off and throws it on the ground.]

Katara: I know it’s upsetting, but it sounds like you’re overreacting.

Aang: Overreacting? If I hadn’t blocked my chakra, I’d probably be in the Avatar State right now!

Here’s the thing about so-called analyses of this excerpt: in a manner extremely convenient to the poster, they never seek to contextualize this moment. (I mean, to do so would deplatform their entire “argument” - perhaps that’s why they avoid performing a full analysis?) So let’s avoid that pitfall from the start.

Firstly, below are some links to related posts; I’m going to do my best to summarize the most relevant parts, but for anyone who desires greater detail, I gotchu 😤

This post explains why EIP (the play, lol) is imperialist propaganda and is intended to belittle the entire Gaang.

This post explains how Aang never acted “entitled” to Katara’s affections, particularly in regard to EIP.

This post breaks down the infamous EIP kiss like Snopes Fact Checker, covering common misconceptions, important perspectives to consider, etc.

Alright. With that out the way, it’s time for some context.

Aang and Katara have this conversation on the balcony after watching 95% of “The Boy in the Iceberg,” a play chock-full of Fire Nation propaganda that demeans the entire Gaang in order to prop up the Fire Nation as superior (hence why the play ends with Ozai’s victory). Here is my general breakdown of Aang and Katara’s treatment in particular from a previous post:

- katara, an indigenous woman, is highly sexualized and portrayed as overly dramatic and tearful, because the fire nation objectifies women not of their own people and views them as less intelligent and less emotionally stable

- aang, the avatar, the sole survivor of the fire nation’s genocide of the air nomads who is incredibly in-touch with his spirituality and femininity, is portrayed as an overly-airy and immature woman. the fire nation portrays him with a female actor to demean him (like, that’s classic imperialistic propagandist tactics) and furthermore writing his character as a childish airhead reinforces the fire nation sentiment that the air nomads were weak, foolish people who did not deserve to exist in their world

In other words, these kids have just watched almost an entire play that preys upon their insecurities and depicts them using racist and sexist stereotypes about their respective nations. It is completely understandable that tensions might run a little high and that their interactions would not be as balanced as usual (Katara and Aang have a great track record of communicating well with each other, as it happens!).

So we have to keep that in mind when examining the aforementioned excerpt. But there are other factors to consider, too! Namely: they are kids. Children. Teens. Aang is 12, Katara is 14.

If we want to be scientific, a person’s brain doesn’t finish developing until they are 25, lmao, and the preteen/teen years are when the prefrontal cortex that controls “rationality,” “judgement,” “forethought,” etc. is still developing. This doesn’t mean Aang and Katara are irrational and make poor decisions 24/7 (obviously not), but it does mean that in an intense, highly emotional situation, like after watching a play that intentionally demeans them and depicts them as inferior, they are more likely to overreact, more likely to be emotional, and more likely to make mistakes. Like, I’m serious, lol. “Teens process information with the amygdala.” That’s part of the brain that helps control emotions! It’s why teens sometimes struggle to articulate what we’re thinking, especially in situations that require instinct/impulse and quick decisions, because we’re really feeling whenever we make those choices. Acting more on emotion. Our brains simply haven’t finished developing the decision-making parts, lmao.

In sum: Aang and Katara are both kids, not adults, and should be interpreted as such. This doesn’t negate their intelligence, because they are both incredibly smart and Aang is arguably the wisest of the Gaang, but they are human. Young humans. They have emotions, and we should not be so cruel as to assume they’d never act on them.

So taking that all together, we can now acknowledge the high stress Aang and Katara are under, understand why they might be upset (*cough* imperialist propaganda is hurtful *cough*), and examine how their youth might play into their emotional reactions. And funny thing - all analyses that come to the conclusion of Aang “threatening” Katara here do not usually bother with this context. I can’t imagine why!

And you know what, let’s add one more piece of context: Sokka states that Aang left the theater “like, ten minutes ago,” which is what cues Katara to go look for him on the balcony. The reason I mention this line is because to me, it suggests Aang knew he was more worked up than usual! He chose to separate himself from his friends so he could process his frustration! He did not take his anger at the play out on them; instead, he purposefully took time and space to be alone.

With that in mind, I don’t understand at all how Aang’s Avatar state quote could be interpreted as a threat? Canonly, Aang is someone who was aware enough of his frustration to separate himself from the others - yet the logical next step is him threatening Katara as a result? He knew his intense emotions were because of the play (which he says himself), so the logical conclusion is that he then pinned the fault on Katara? What?? Sorry, that interpretation has no textual basis, lmao. But I digress!

Aang tells Katara, “If I hadn’t blocked my chakra, I’d probably be in the Avatar State right now!” As you said, this is the line people point to in an attempt to justify their (baseless) conclusion that Aang is “threatening” Katara. So let’s bring in the two key pieces of context: imperialist propaganda and age. Given that Aang is 12, and given that Aang has just watched almost a full play that demeans him and everything his people stood for (and let’s not forget it also mocks his and Katara’s love for each other)…

His reaction is understandable. An exaggeration and needlessly dramatic, but understandable. He feels vulnerable and insecure and Aang is human. He is human and flawed and he overreacts here and I love that A:TLA shows how even our heroes, even people who are truly good at heart and in soul, can get overly upset (especially given the aforementioned circumstances!). Would Aang actually be in the Avatar state at that moment, had it been possible? Of course not! He’s young and he’s hurt and as such he says something dramatic to convey his anxieties and frustrations. The line is not meant to be taken literally, and seeing people do so despite all the factors that should be taken into consideration when analyzing it… Cue a long, tired sigh from me and so many other A:TLA fans.

And to be honest? I cannot fathom how people watch this episode and come to the conclusion that Aang is “threatening” Katara. To me, this episode - besides being a recap episode - is one that humanizes our cast even further. Aang snaps at Katara, kisses her when he shouldn’t (which the story appropriately treats as wrong). Katara pushes down her true feelings and retreats into herself, afraid to start a relationship with the boy she loves because she’s already lost him once before and can’t bear to do so again. Zuko further confronts the hurt he’s enacted upon others, especially upon Iroh. Toph practices being vulnerable and accepting vulnerability from others by conversing with Zuko. Sokka witnesses how others have erased his contributions and labelled him as nothing more than the token nonbender in the group. Even Suki learns that she is not the only person who holds a place in Sokka’s heart and that she can never replace what he has lost.

To watch this episode where our heroes must come to terms with how the Fire Nation deems them inherently inferior, with how they have more fights to overcome in the future with the Fire Nation than a single war, and to come to the conclusion that… that what, Aang is abusive? A monster? Irredeemable? That he would threaten his best friend, someone he loves in every way?

Wow. That says more than enough about the viewer, doesn’t it?

[msgrumpygills]

Genuinely starting to wonder if Jared can do anything without making it about himself. Like, the inspiration for Walker (taking a real, serious issue in America and turning it into a TV show) the BLM post, the prequel debacle and with this...

There was already a GoFundMe set up by her friends and family. He could have easily posted a link to that (which has not met its goal yet). Instead he sets up his own, which okay good, the family is still getting the money, but it's taking attention away from the original GoFundMe. And then he added a littlie promotion in there so now people are just donating so they can get a chance to talk to Jared (I mean go a head and bleed your fans dry for a good cause if the money still goes to a good cause) and they don't even really care about the cause and honestly it's stuff like that that is slowly but surely killing empathy in humanity. You should care about the children who just lost there mother, not some wealthy celebrity whho gets paid to play pretend for a living.

It's not even a matter of not liking Jared, it's a matter of being critical of his actions when they can be so selfish, especially with a large following. If you're so keen on being famous then you have to remember that people look up to you and they will emulate your actions because mimicry is the sincerest form of flattery.

I'm sorry I just think he needs to step back and get some perspective on how he's been presenting himself to the world.

Not gonna lie, I had forgotten about the BLM post so I had to go look it up and cringed all over again. I think I just kinda blocked it out of my memory because it was such a “me me me” post, but reading it again today made me wanna barf. I did chuckle at the first comment on the post being someone saying “I wonder if the bartender you punched was a father.” 

I’m sure I’ll get hate for this (I’ve already gotten some upset stans mad at me for calling out his BS) but Jared is really starting to be more bold with his ego and inability to let someone else have attention. I don’t remember where/when the article was with him talking about Walker so I can’t really comment on that, but don’t worry! There’s more to unpack! 

His BLM post. What the actual......what? I struggle to say that he had good intentions because the entire post was about him. Also, it’s laughable to look at it now because now that the BLM movement has sort of quieted down with celebrities, what about all those pledges he made? He hasn’t changed a single bit. It really makes it seem like it was performative and just something to get people off his back so he could say “but I posted this beautiful thing!” Get over yourself dude. 

The prequelgate I’ve talked about a lot so I don’t want to just rehash everything I’ve said, but again, it was someone else getting the spotlight and he couldn’t have that. Especially because he wasn’t getting the insane love and attention that he expected from Walker. 

This GFM thing just confuses me. Like you said, the family already had one set up, so why not use your influence to draw attention there to get the donation goal reached? No, he had to make his own fund with a special perk to maybe talk to him on Zoom! How generous. What is the point? ESPECIALLY when he, nor his wife, donated to HIS fund. On top of that, it stinks of PR stunt considering all of the articles praising him for making a fundraiser. So brave, Jared! True charity king. 

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again; until he actually faces consequences for his actions and behaviors, he’ll never change. Fans continue to let him get by with everything he does and pad his ego and look what it’s done.

[intothewickedwood]

Once Upon A Time Rewatch: 6x15 A Wondrous Place

Just moved yesterday so bear with me. Lifted so many bags. If my arms aren’t like Emma’s after that I am suing! 

What episode do we have today?

A Wondrous Place. Okay, I don’t really remember that one. Do they go to Agrabah? Guess we’ll find out.

I wonder if Wonderland and Agrabah are right next to each other. It seemed to be the case in Ouat in Wonderland but maybe there’s a set portal between them or something. Either that or they’re in the same realm.

Agrabah is apparently across the desert from Eric’s Kingdom. So, in the same realm as the Enchanted Forest? 

Did you know, Snow’s nightmare prison realm in 7x22 was Agrabah? 

Let David be angry about what happened, dammit. I wish they would make it more about David’s feelings as opposed to being about trust in Emma and Hook’s relationship. What’s the point in adding this Storyline if there’s not going to be conflict between the people involved? 

Okay, I get that they wanted conflict in Emma and Hook’s relationship, but she’s not even upset about the actual murder. They could have made it about him not trusting her with the secret of him being a furry or something if that’s what they were going for. Basically, why write in the murder of David’s father if there is not going to be consequences for that or conflict about that specifically? Don’t get me wrong, I like the idea and potential of Hook killing David’s father. We get one scene of David pacing before making it all about CS trust issues and that’s it?? I just want David to be as upset as he was at George when he found out his dad was murdered. I want Emma to question her stance on forgiveness, even for a loved one, when those close to her are hurt irreparably right in front of her. Where is the internal and external conflict? I don’t want it to be about rehashed trust issues. I want it to be about how characters come to terms and move forward in an angst-ridden impossible situation.

Kraken’s blood allows you to travel between realms? Rumple is tearing out his hair right now. Oh! I guess that’s how it got shorter!

Chill, Killian. I’mma make you some camomile tea.

He’s so desperate to see his Kraken lover again. Get some of that tentacle, Hook! 

No one remembers Achmed. He f***ed a tiger!!

If you know that reference, you know xD.

Aladdin: “Jasmine, duck.” Jasmine (petrified): “Where?!” Jasmine has an intense phobia of ducks, confirmed. 

Don’t hit Kracky. He just wants his Killy.

Killian, how could you hurt your lover like that! The betrayal!

Hook, honey, I don’t know why you're so moody with everyone today but I'mma get you some cbd gummies. You’ll be fine. 

No one’s gonna help you if you talk to them like that, my dude. 

Jasmine “So forgive me for-” Me: “-doing what’s best for you! So forgive me for try-y-y-ying to make things easier.” Listen, I rewatched We Are the Tigers musical last week and I may suddenly be a little bit obsessed. Go watch/listen to it so we can geek out! 

Back to the rewatch.

Where’s Nemo and Liam? 

Jafar is quite handy at travelling between realms according to Killian. Maybe that’s how he went from Agrabah to Wonderland so easily in Ouatiw. But I’m sure we saw him use the white rabbit, so surely he can’t have another method. Unless... His magic carpet??

Emma is so blasé about Hook running off. She just seems like she wants to sleep. But she seems like she wants to sleep this whole damn season. Girl’s so done with everything. Completely checked out, bless her. Though it is sad to see a favourite character change so dramatically. Compare her to s1 or even s4 Emma and goodness gracious I just think s6 Emma might benefit from a heavy dose of sleeping curse or something. Let. Her. Sleep. Someone could just run Henry through in front of her and she’d take about 10 minutes to even realise and be like “Oh. Okay.” in slow motion when she finally notices and then she’d make out with Hook. Bonus points if Hook is the one to run Henry through.

Friends? That’s her mama. But hey, my mum’s my buddy too.

Lol. She stole a fork?

If you had to be a human hybrid, what would you be? Maybe I’d be a manticore or a womanticore.

Jasmine is being awfully nice to someone who just stole something. Some might say she has a thing for thieves. Wink. Wink.

Wow. This magical carpet ride is super gay. Love it.

Oh my God, she’s right. It is a rug!

Why is Hook being so rude today? 

Regina is just staring at Emma like “wtf happened to you?”

I just realised, Regina basically invited Emma on a date and invited her mother lol.

Snow lol.

Omg Emma needs a freaking lucozade. Someone get her a lucozade. Wake up Emma! *shakes her aggressively* Wake the hell up! Come back to us! 

Don’t the Jones brothers wanna hang out more?

That girl really loves her forks. 

Woah. She chased Eric all the way to Agrabah after one dance. 

Eric: “I have a great love for your people, especially poached with lemon and capers” lmao!!

“Son of a fish.”

What?! How’d he free himself?!

Ouat please explain. Are they suggesting the Well of Wonders Woman didn’t curse him to be a genie but just cursed him to stay in the bottle. They’ve gotta explain these things or they just look like inconsistencies.

Oh. Hang on. Ariel was supposed to have lost her voice. Okay but she had a necklace that allowed her to speak. I’m guessing Jafar destroyed it when he banished her to the sea.

Lol. He really hates being called bastard?

So, these events occur before present day events of Ouatiw. Agrabah was trapped in a ring all throughout Ouatiw? I feel like we saw it still standing in the present day in Ouatiw, no? I need to rewatch. 

Are the people of Agrabah still living their best lives inside that ring? Do they even know they’re trapped?

Ha! Turned into a staff. He freaking deserves that after doing exactly that to Amara. But then and again she probably deserved it. 

All they had to do was kiss to get Agrabah out of that ring. What?! Oh, and he’s free from the genie curse too. This is getting ridiculous. Can we please have some consistency with the limitations of magic? Genie curses cannot be flipping broken with true loves kiss. That would have saved Cyrus and Alice a hell of a lot of trouble!

“I’m an oyster head!” 

Emma, please, take a 10-hour nap. You’re making me tired. 

Ther will be no portals between Emma and Killian so long as Gideon has her tears. These rules make no sense!

It felt like ridiculous solutions were thrown into that episode. How do these tears of the saviour rules work? Could Cora have taken Emma’s tears to stop her taking a portal to Henry in 2a or does it just prevent her taking a portal to her romantic love and vice versa? What?!

[chilling-seavey]

Lucy's pregnancy scare ~T

I’m so surprised no one has asked about this since it was in Lucy’s character profile from sooo long ago but, finally, here we go 😂😶🥰

Lucy was sure she was royally fucked. In all senses of the word.

She stood in front of her bathroom mirror and stared down at her phone screen on the counter, the app open and reflecting the large bold font spelling out ‘2 weeks late’ in red. Angry, scary red. She was freshly eighteen, had a scholarship to CCPA lined up, a promising future, and she was late.

Of course, being the youngest, her sisters were long moved out which left Lucy all alone to stew on this information all morning, locked in her room. She had to confide in someone but deciding who was the issue. Every adult in her life had pros and cons when it came to sharing secrets and Lucy was debating just not telling anyone at all.

Pregnant was such a scary word.

Lucy was the drama queen of her sisters but when it came to the possibility of becoming a teenager mother, any girl would start to go a little insane with worry. She stood in front of her full length mirror and turned to the side and lifted up the bottom of her shirt to try to see if there was any sort of bump. The small, miniscule curve under her hand had her gasping.  

She yanked her shirt back down and flopped backwards onto the end of her bed with a huff, emotional tears welling in her eyes. What was she supposed to do? One night and it was just her luck that she was met with this.

Lucy clutched her hands together over her chest, “God, I am sorry I sinned. I should have begged on my knees for your forgiveness as soon as I possibly could but I didn’t and now you’re spiting me, I know it. I am so terribly sorry. I will never ever do such a terribly horrible awful disgusting thing until I am married if you please just give me my period right now.”

She paused.

“Please? Right now.”

Another pause.

Nothing.

“Fuck.” Lucy sighed, dropping her palms over her face. She quickly pressed them together again, “Sorry for cursing.”

She drummed her fingers together lightly, her eyes still closed in thought of what she needed or should do next, “Now, dear, sweet, glorious and good, Heavenly Father, I just need you to bring me even a sliver of salvation because I know my dad is going to absolutely murder me.”

Lucy tiptoed down the hallway and peeked around the doorway into the main area of the apartment where Florence was making lunch.

“Good morning, Lucy Lu.” Florence smiled over at her daughter. “You slept in today.”

“Yeah.” Lucy mumbled, sitting herself at the breakfast bar. Her mother didn’t know she had been up since 7, gong crazy in her own mind. “Where’s Daddy?”

“At work.”

“Right.” Lucy said with a sigh.

Florence sit over a sandwich to her and then sat beside her with her own.

“I’m not very hungry right now.” Lucy mumbled, pushing the plate away so she could slouch her head into her folded arms on the countertop.

“Are you feeling okay?” Florence ran her hand over her daughter’s back.

Lucy shook her head, “I feel so sick.”

It wasn’t a lie. She truly felt like she might completely vomit. Pregnancy or nerves? She wasn’t sure.

“Why don’t you go lay down and I can make you some tea?” Florence offered.

Lucy shook her head again. She couldn’t keep stewing on this…it would completely drive her insane.

“I need to talk to you and Daddy.” Lucy sat up again, glancing over at her mother with a pout.

“He won’t be home until 5 but I’m here.” Florence said softly, petting back her daughter’s long blonde hair. “What’s going on?”

Lucy slouched back onto the counter with a groan, “I want him home now.”

She was draped so dramatically over the counter she nearly looked deathly ill or acting as such and her solemn face had Florence worried, “Talk to me in the meantime and he can catch up-”

“Mommy, I need to call him.” Lucy said strongly.

Daniel would always drop anything for his girls and when his youngest called him at work with her voice wavering and asking for him to come home, you best bet he clocked out early and headed right for his car. With no sort of hint as to why Lucy needed him home so desperately – just her rehashing that was important – Daniel was stuck in his mind the whole way home. But his worst idea of the drive seemed to have been a reality as Lucy sat both her parents in the living room, barely giving Daniel a second to put his bag down, before she was ripping off the band aid.

“I’m pregnant.”

Not even a ‘hello’ or a ‘thanks for dropping everything to come home’, simply, getting to the point. Silence fell over the apartment. Daniel and Florence stared at their daughter blankly for a moment. Two moments. Three.

“I think.” Lucy added softly.

“You think or you know?” Florence asked gently, having been through the same thing once before at her very same age.

Lucy, looked to her mother with tears in her eyes, “I’m two weeks late.”

Daniel opened his mouth to say something but closed it again and let out a very long breath, holding his face in his hands with his elbows on his knees. He made some sort of weird noise – somewhere between a groan and a whimper that did not sound human in the slightest – and then stood right back up and walked down the hallway, slamming his bedroom door behind him.

Lucy gasped lightly, watching the empty hallway where her father had disappeared down, and her eyes filled with tears. She let out a small sob and hid her face in her hands.

“Hey, hey. Come here.” Florence reached for her hand and led her over to the couch, sitting her down and wrapped her arms securely around her daughter. “It’s alright, sweetheart. It’s going to be okay.”

“Daddy hates me!” Lucy cried, tears pouring down her cheeks.

“Oh my gosh, he does not hate you.” Florence tisked, wiping her thumb over her daughter’s cheeks to rid her tears. “He just needs some time to wrap his head around this, we all do. But you know how he is.”

Lucy leaned into her mother’s side and cried loudly, “I’m so scared!”

“I know, sweet girl. I know you are.” Florence sighed, holding her close and pressing comforting kisses to her head. “I know exactly how you feel.”

“Why aren’t you mad at me?” Lucy finally asked.

“What would getting mad do for us? It won’t change anything.” Florence said.

“Daddy’s mad.” Lucy argued softly.

“No…I think you just scared him a little.” Florence chuckled lightly, rubbing her hand over her daughter’s back.

Both women watched the hallway as if expecting him to return but he didn’t. Lucy sighed heavily, resting her head on her mother’s shoulder, finding the usual comfort that came with her embrace. They waited a few long seconds in silence.

“Have you taken a test?” Florence finally asked.

Lucy shook her head.

“So we don’t know for sure.”

“But…look.” Lucy flopped back against the couch and lifted up the bottom of her shirt. “You can see it.”

“You won’t be able to see anything for at least six weeks.” Florence chuckled. “You’re just the same as you were.”

Lucy huffed and tugged her shirt back down. She stared blankly at the ceiling.

“I’m going to go talk to your father.” Florence said and stood up from the couch. “Are you okay here for a moment?”

Lucy nodded through her pout.

Florence left her with a kiss to her head before making her way down the hallway to the master bedroom at the end. Daniel was sat on the end of the bed, elbows on his knees and face in his hands, unmoving.

Florence closed the door behind her and walked over to join him. He didn’t look up.

“I failed as a father.” he mumbled.

“Oh Lord, Daniel James.” Florence sighed, “You did not.”

“She…” Daniel looked over at his wife, his own tears grazing his blue eyes. He took a second to try and steady his breathing, and continued in a whisper, “She had sex.”

“Yeah, Dani. That’s how it works.” Florence said.

“Bleh!” Daniel shuttered, scrunching up his face in disgust. “That’s horrible.”

“You did too. That’s how we made her.” Florence gestured towards the general direction of the living room.

“Yeah but…she’s my baby.” Daniel retorted through a small sniffle. He bowed his head again as he tried to compose himself. “My baby girl is having a baby. She…she had sex and she’s having a baby.”

“Okay stop saying that because now you’re grossing me out.” Florence said.

“I hate her stupid boyfriend.”

“I know you do. I’m not too crazy about him either.”

“He reminds me of Matt.”

Florence paused a moment to think about it, “Shit…you’re right.”

“He’s a jerk and selfish and ill-mannered and makes terrible decisions and…he got our baby girl pregnant.” Daniel groaned, dropping his face back into his hands.

“God, she’s more like me every day.” Florence sighed. “In all the worst ways too. Just my luck. You didn’t fail as a father; I failed as a mother.”

That seemed to switch something inside of Daniel as he turned to glance over at his wife, her own chin in her hands. He took a deep breath and stood up, situating himself right in front of her.

“No. No way. She’s got the best of you Flora. All the best of you. But she has something you didn’t; she has parents who actually give a shit. Or at least it seemed when now instead of being out there and holding her and comforting her through this we’re in here moping like we’re the children.”

Daniel walked off before Florence could answer and she watched him walk into their ensuite bathroom. There was a sound of a bit of a commotion and she stood up to stand in the doorway, watching him shuffle through the cabinet under one of the sinks. He sat back with a pregnancy test box in hand and an uncertain expression on his face. Leaving the other things thrown over the floor, Daniel stood up again. Florence followed him back down the hallway to the living room, where Lucy was curled up on the couch with her knees to her chest and her fingernail in her mouth; anxiously impatient.

With her parents back in the room, she stood up quickly, “I’m sorry if I upset you.”

She glanced at the box in her father’s hand.

“What’s that?”

Daniel held it out to her, and she hesitantly took it.

“You’re going to take that and we’re going to all look at it together, okay?”

Lucy glanced back up at her parents, looking between them with uneasiness spread all over her face. She was waiting for the yelling, for the obvious disappointment, but Daniel only stepped closer and pressed a soft kiss to her forehead.

“Go on.” he whispered, gesturing her down the hall.

Lucy got herself in the bathroom and Daniel and Florence waited right outside, hand in hand. The apartment was silent. It seemed to be taking her a while but Daniel didn’t dare rush her, simply staring at the ceiling and clutching onto his wife’s hand. The seconds ticked by into minutes.

“How long does it take to pee?” Daniel mumbled anxiously under his breath and stepped away from Florence to knock on the door. “Lucy? Are you okay in there?”

There was shuffling from the other side and then the door opened. Lucy was red-eyed and crying but held the taken test out to her father. Only a single pink line was shown. Not pregnant.

“Oh fuck.” Daniel exhaled deeply, passing it to Florence before scooping his daughter right into his arms. Lucy clung onto him tightly, sobbing her tears of relief into his neck. Daniel cried right along with her, silent thankful tears that were mixed in with a bit of sad as he realized that day that his girls were truly all grown up.

“I’m sorry!” Lucy wailed. “I’m so sorry!”

“Don’t apologize.” Daniel leaned back from their tight embrace to hold her face in his hands. “You always come to us, okay? About anything…especially things like this. This was scary and nerve-wracking, but I am proud of you. And really fucking relieved.”

Lucy chuckled lightly as he pressed a kiss to her head and pulled her close again, burying her against his chest like he was going to swallow her with his arms.

“You’ve got a whole bright and incredible future, Princess, so don’t be stupid about things, okay? I want to see you succeed before you have babies. I want to see you married before you have babies.”

“I don’t want babies with Jackson!” Lucy said quickly. “He hasn’t replied to my text in four days!”

“Breakup with him. He doesn’t deserve you.” Florence spoke up, brushing her daughter’s hair from her face and kissed her temple.

“Yes. Breakup with him and I’ll take out for dinner wherever you want.” Daniel agreed.

Lucy leaned up to kiss his cheek before heading to her room to grab her phone, calling over her shoulder, “Can we stop at church before dinner though because I really need to repent.”

[cakeandpi]

Parker!! spoilers abound

hm, so Harry (aka Lawyer) has been fired/let go and no one gave him the memo on it. Is his old job/boss going to be this episodes mark?

oof, Harry is bad at being subtle with his ‘okay look in [place]’ comm directions

ah okay so isn’t a legal firm that’s about representing their clients to the best of their ability. it’s a firm whose about smoothing bad things over for rich clients so that there’s little to no consequences.

“I remember when you wanted to change the world.”/“World did change. We just went along for the ride.” So the world changed the boss, the boss gave up on changing the world because he saw a way to profit from it and didn’t care that he hurt others along the way.

The way that car drove up onto the curve, I thought that was Sophie in a big hurry at first. (I would have thought Parker but there wasn’t enough time for her to crack the safe, get to the relevant files, get out, and then drive there.) But no, it’s Maxwell’s thugs because the man holds a grudge apparently. So I’m going to guess he’s going to be the season big bad? Or is he just a 2-episode bad guy and we’ll find out who the real big bad is later?

Hardison: listing various problems on various international efforts he’s helping with Eliot: let’s make this a restaurant metaphor Hardison: *very much regretting ever buying Eliot that brewpub*

Nuts and bolts about bad guy details

Also that bit about Hardison being distracted by problems is definitely a distraction, there’s no way he’d pause on making sure their safehouse was secure

Eliot is not so much pissed as insulted that the world is at the point of advertising the corruption rather than him needing to beat it out of someone.

drone!!

*snort* eliot's usually the grouchy one, and he’s carrying a trashcan right now. there’s no way hardison doesn’t make some oscar the grouch joke once he sees that.

“It’s like you never stopped.”/“Yeah. Quite the act.” Sophie slows down at Hardison’s comment, then sighs and sits. She’s finding this tiring now. Is it because she’s out of practice? Or because after so many years of retirement, her hearts not in it anymore? And Hardison notices. He doesn’t say anything concrete immediately, because Sophie hasn’t really elaborated on what’s going on with her. When she does - it’s her grief, and how its affecting her grift now - there’s this concern in Hardison’s face. There’s absolutely going to be a meeting between the OT3 about how to straddle not straining Sophie too much and not babying her should she stay on for another job after this.

“But I can’t work forever, can I?” There’s a defeated tone to this, and it’s true - Sophie’s just human, one day she too will pass on. Her grief for Nate (and how being back with the team keeps reopening that wound) is coloring her view on this for sure. (Did Nate work himself to death?) It’s also, very distantly, a remark on the OT3 - they too can’t work forever. They were Sophie’s and Nate’s proteges. And it’s not that the OT3 doesn’t have anything in place if they go down - they’ve got small teams running all over the world. But they don’t have their own personal proteges. Harry’s a decent start, but they’ll need to recruit and open up their circle to at least one, maybe two more before they’re ready to retire. Before they, too, burn too hot for too long.

“You hear that? That’s a very distinctive sound.” YES

Another Basil & Brick truck! This one has.... empanadas, ropa vieja, sancocho, and I think the last one is yuca frita. Mm, yuca fries.

BREANNA!!!

Parker! Taught Breanna to tail people! (Hardison in particular?) When she was 11! Wait does that mean Parker’s met Nana?! Also Parker is so smug and satisfied that Breanna paid attention to her lessons.

“I teach every kid I meet how to do crime.” <3 be gay do crime

This is a big ‘I’m telling mom!’ argument and I love it, especially the “I think she’s napping” LMAO

“How you saved Eliot’s life all those times” Oh man Hardison is sleeping on the metaphorical couch tonight. But also I need to come back to this later because honestly and really? Hardison has - as part of a group team effort - saved Eliot’s life from himself. By giving him a way to work through his anger issues, by caring for him, by showing Eliot he’s needed and that he’s more than just a hitter. The team saved Eliot’s life. (And there’s probably a bunch of erasing digital trails/etc where Hardison did more directly save Eliot’s life but that's besides the point.)

“But hacking’s kind of old school anyway.” And as she goes on, Eliot goes from aggrieved to ‘oh, a new best friend’ because now he has someone to help him annoy Hardison.

Parker pulls Hardison into a side room (by his ear, but he’s not protesting in pain so that’s got to be just for show). And then pushes him up against the wall and Hardison is like ‘okay whatever lecture is coming can it not be like this?’ If it weren’t for the glass walls that’d be some makeout stuff right here.

LOL at Parker’s standard for a ‘normal’ person being ‘uses Uber, pays taxes, and has a birth certificate’.

“Wait is this like that time in Paris?” I... don’t remember an episode set in Paris with a robot and explosions so this must be during the time skip. And - “... but you didn’t want to hurt Eliot’s feelings so you secretly wanted us to agree.” I’m going to scream if there’s no confirmed ot3 by the end of the season. And cry. And read a whole bunch of fic.

Look at these two being honest with each and communicating and respecting each others opinions, they’ve grown so much from pretzel metaphors.

“You’re not mad. You did the Picard tug.”/“I am mad.“/“Did the tug. You know I like that.” Parker might be mad (at Hardison? Breanna? Both?) but not so much that she’s completely shutting out Hardison, giving him a nonverbal signal that she’s not pissed, just needs some time to be upset before everything’s okay.

“One. Job.” Parker says. And we the viewers know it’ll be more than one. But really what that means by now is that this is an audition. Parker may have taught Breanna some things, but now Breanna has to show that they do better with her rather than without, that she’s an asset and not a liability or dead weight.

I laughed so hard that because this shit’s illegal, there’s no cutting corners on the paperwork.

“And you didn’t get tortured.”/“Not this time.” I can’t tell if Eliot wants Harry to get a little bit tortured or if he’s just reminding Harry that this time around people were in a good mood and showing off.

Breanna stops herself before suggesting something, and Hardison, for all that he isn’t delighted at her presence and protested her being here, encourages her to speak up. If she’s going to be part of the team, even for one job, she’s part of the team and that means speaking up and throwing ideas out there for others to bounce around, even if it winds up being a football that can’t be dribbled.

OT3 TEAM JUST GOT DUBBED ‘DRILL TEAM’. (why is that also somehow a dirty joke i’m dying here)

Oh one of the baddies is a Com4r4t fan... oh wait no this is the beginning of a plan backfiring.

Aww Breanna is so proud of what she’s done! It’s very much like season 1 Hardison. So Sophie and Hardison go to do their own thing, only that means the baddies are here to talk to Breanna and she doesn’t have backup.

THE 'LET ME GET MY BOSS’ THE SPIN AROUND AND THE ‘WHY ARE YOU BOTHERING MY STAFF’ I LOVE BREANNA.

“I’m your neighbor who runs a business built on discretion.” This is going to go very badly depending on how Breanna plays this. At least she gets the earbud in to call for help!

Another Brick&Basil truck! Etoufee and jambalaya, dammit eliot stop choosing delicious food to advertise. 

“I monkey-shamed the DJ” I. Love. Her. Also Sophie’s already read Breanna as having the skills to just need general guidelines for an impromptu grift rather than needing to be fed specific lines.

“Okay here’s the thing.” And there’s a pause, we’re thinking he’s about to come down real hard on Breanna, and then we get “I love Com4r4t.” he is a fanboy I guessed it right!! And then he does go through with the threat, but not as a ‘cancel it or die’ sort of threat, but a ‘if i’m disappointed you die’ way.

Breanna nails the impromptu grift though she’s understandably a bit shaken by the threat at the end. (What newcomer wouldn’t be?) But the threat is what pushes Parker into deciding Breanna should go home ASAP. This is Hardison’s family, from before the team, and Parker isn’t about to risk messing that up. If she pushes for Breanna to stay when Hardison doesn’t want Breanna to, and something goes wrong? Parker would never, ever forgive herself.

But as Sophie has pointed out, they’ve all been out of their depth at one point or another. That doesn’t mean that someone should be sent packing.

Lmao Eliot being possessive of the drill.

“Then you ain’t got no more problems ever again.” There’s a certain sense of morbid humor with the team, one that’s both necessary but also a reality. They deal with this level of danger on a semi-regular basis. Harry just hasn’t caught up to that fact yet.

I have a feeling this particular baddie is going to end up dead for managing to drive a 40% cut.

“I’m just saying dude.” I love that Eliot and Hardison don’t have to rehash their entire arguments anymore unless they’re really enjoying themselves, that they can just be all ‘you know I’ve said my piece’.

“Don’t get distracted by the side gig.”/“Is it a side gig?” For all that the team has been their main focus for so long, for all that they all have side projects and gigs, this has been eating up more and more of Hardison’s time. What I thought was him pretending to be distracted earlier may have been a real distraction. And Eliot’s noticed, and he’s noticed that Hardison hasn’t noticed, that Hardison needs to make a choice here.

“In our line of work, you’re one of the best. But in that line of work you’re the only one, man.” Eliot has a soft smile at the end of that, and it's a bit painful, even as I saw it coming, to hear Eliot suggest that Hardison begin to step away from the team’s day to day.

“It’s okay to grow up, to realize you’re not the person you used to be.” None of them are the person they used to be. Not Sophie, not Parker, not Hardison, and certainly not Eliot. They can see that in each other if not in themselves. (Eliot, being the most grounded of all of them, already knew he’d changed eight years ago.)

“You never grew up.”/“Yeah. I achieved perfection pretty early, huh?” Even as Eliot’s the most grounded, even though he’s the one saying that there’s no one else that could fill Hardison’s role in that other work, the idea that Hardison might actually choose to step away from the team is too raw to handle without turning to humor.

Harry’s a bit jumpy, but he’s learning to play it off. I like that he’s a very different character from Nate, that it’s not his anger or ego driving him so much as a desire to make restitution.

And a “Dammit Hardison”

Ooh, Eliot’s in the vents too, just in time to help Parker. (She doubtless has her beloved taser but that would take time away from getting into the vault.)

“I smell lasers” Ahahahahaha

“You’re going to compare me to Eliot right now?” (’over the comms, where others who aren’t Eliot can hear?’ Hardison did not say out loud.)

ouch, okay, Hardison hurting his back like that might be what actually makes him choose the other gig over the team, or at what makes him take a little vacation so he can heal from that. (back injuries are nothing to play around with!)

how did Maxwell get past Eliot? but it’s all good, Eliot’s right behind to disarm him. And Parker’s been doing her hitting lessons, she didn’t even need a taser or to stab anyone!

Oh Harry, the bomb will be used, it’s just not time yet.

New Orleans gumbo is its own food group.

Okay so Hardison’s done a lot of work getting this place in order... WAIT IS THAT A PUNCHING BAG? That’s a punching bag! It might not be the love-letter the brewpub was but it’s definitely a thing added specifically for Eliot.

Oh no, Eliot might realize what Hardison’s doing with this, but Parker hasn’t caught up yet that Hardison’s going to be taking a break from the team.

Parker’s blindsided by this, and she’s upset, but she’s not mad because why didn’t she see this coming she should have seen it, so she leaves to deal with her emotions alone. Hardison follows, naturally, she knew he would, but she can’t face him because then he’ll see her crying, and Parker doesn’t do emotions easily. She’s torn between wanting him to help people and wanting to be with him (and she can’t go with him, she needs to be helping people too).

And Parker doesn’t want Breanna there without Hardison. Again because it’d put Hardison’s family in danger and that’s a step too far for Parker if Hardison doesn’t okay it. And also because with Hardison leaving, Breanna’s just going to be reminders of what Parker’s missing. And Breanna doesn’t have Hardison’s skillset, can’t fill his shoes - not that she should but she can’t, and Parker, I think, is already mentally preparing herself to go it alone again. Because if this job needs Hardison so bad, then surely Eliot’s got some project that needs his specific attention, and it was just one job for Breanna, and Sophie’s been adamant that this is one last job for her, and Harry’s still new and will probably decide to do his own thing given time to think... I think that’s where her brain is at, at least for the next thirty seconds, before she catches up with herself and realizes that more like the time she busted her leg than the team dissolving around her. (This kind of went weird places but that’s stream of thought for me)

And as they come back in Parker’s already cheering up some, because that wave of despair has already blown over. Yeah, she’s not a parent, but she’s good at teaching when she tries.

“It could be a reunion tour.”/“No. I’m retired.” It’s very different from Nate’s old protestations. He was not a thief. Whereas with Sophie it’s not ready. And while they all point out that she’s been happier while doing cons, that they could use the help, it’s not forceful or overpowering. It’s still Sophie’s decision. They’re not going to make her house their new base and taunt her with it; they’re not the sort of people who’d do that anymore, and anyway that’d be cruel instead of a fun sort of goading.

And because they give Sophie space to make a decision, while she doesn’t want to make a long-term commitment, she’s willing to take on ‘just a few more’.

[readingaccountability]

snow crash - neal stephenson

my playlist (because of The Way That I Am)

final thoughts:

okay, im going to be honest right out of the gate- i cant decide whether this is a book id recommend or not. it was really fun for the most part, but personally there was a lot more exposition than id like. the early portions of the novel have exposition which feels completely fair, mostly things relating to worldbuilding. stephenson creates his own vision of future america, and some places online referred to it as cyberpunk, and some as post-cyberpunk. id be more in the latter camp, mostly due to the way he plays with tropes, leaving the reader unsure of which will be subverted and which wont.

the use of language was really fun, and i enjoyed the worldbuilding a lot. his vision of a futuristic capitalistic earth feels surreal in its immediacy and recognizability. the back jacket blurb ends with "a future america so bizarre, so outrageous, you'll recognize it immediately." which, yeah. a texan info-tech magnate? two competing corporations owning the highway system? suburban city-states? this was another enjoyable thing- everything was colorfully named, and names treated totally normally, which kind of poked fun at how we have everyday things named very ludicrously and for the most part we are totally blind to it.

one aspect i really enjoyed was that the author often doesn't make certain things clear to the audience, until he does, and then it becomes necessary to reassess the entire story and setting. this goes to underscore the theme of the importance of information and the ways we take it in and perceive the world based upon it. for example, we don't learn that y.t. is fifteen until maybe 75 pages in, at which point a lot makes sense in retrospect. the same thing occurs in the worldbuilding, as suddenly a detail is given in passing and the reader must incorporate it into the setting, which by default we assume to be similar in many ways to our idea of america. it keeps the reader on their toes as well as furthering the worldbuilding. for the most part, the tech stuff didnt feel outdated to me, despite being a future projected out from '92.

however, aspects of the book are definitely very 1992. id put these into two camps: the first, being that the book does at different times use slurs. the main character is black and asian, the n word is used a few times by racist side-character/antagonist types, as are a few other racial slurs. there was also the occasional usage of the r slur, within the narrative prose itself, rather than usage as an insult within dialogue.

the protagonist, who is named, unfortunately, hiro protagonist, is a great character and felt very fleshed out to me, though at times he reminded me more of dirk strider than normally would be ideal. (its obvious that stephenson and andrew hussie are of a similar type of writer, and play with similar tropes, lmao.) hiro is a man of many worlds. he seems to shift between them easily, though never fully existing in any of them. this is reflected in his background, both in his biracial identity and in having been raised on a myriad of army bases. this is layered further in his fluidity in interacting with both reality and the metaverse, yet remaining slightly, consistently aloof. fascinatingly the first moment i sensed this drop was when we meet juanita- aka where his real and meta realities coincide. the description of them as the adam and eve of the metaverse is both insanely romantic and thematically key (good god i wish we had more than like, two conversations between them). juanita designed the facial component to metaverse avatars, doing the majority of this work when the two were together, and hiro can see echoes of both their facial tics in the face of every avatar in the metaverse. in a way, by having done this work juanita is positioned by the narrative as one of the gods of this digital realm. she is also hiro's call to action, being aware of the coming trouble and alerting him to it, as well as connecting him to the informational database he needs to prepare.

y.t., the secondary protagonist, fucking ruled. i loved that she was just a fifteen year old punkass kid whose mom doesnt know how crazy this part time job is. y.t. being worried about her mom was a great thread throughout, and a really good balance to how obviously independent y.t. is. i do wish there had been a chance to explain more about her background (she has a dad who left who is mentioned in a throwaway sentence, and a boyfriend who is mentioned near the beginning but never again.) i really enjoyed how obviously hyperaware y.t. was at all times about her own place within the insanities of the setting, while also consistently writing her as a teen maybe in way too deep who thinks about things in typically teenage ways. but like, that wasn't ever held against her? the narrative meets her where she is. it was honestly awesome. HOWEVER,

i absolutely hated the raven and y.t. scenes. how creepy!!! he basically statutory rapes her!!! we know hes at least late 20s early 30s, because hes the same age as hiro. if this sort of content is upsetting to read for you, i definitely do NOT recommend this book. (if you want to avoid reading these bits: ch 47 y.t. meets raven, ch 50 they are in a bar eating, ch 52 things happen that result in y.t.'s anti-assault device activating- she did not activate it on purpose, but forgot it was there- and raven is knocked out.)

please PLEASE dont take any of the following analysis as like, trying to be apologetic towards this scenes. because again they were awful and hard to get through and really gross. but im also cognizant that the author was obviously trying to convey something by making the choice, like the way it was written is obviously not condoning this sort of thing.

i think maybe what stephenson was trying to get at with that, was that we see hiro internally negate any potential for anything untoward with y.t. basically immediately, since he kind of senses that she might have a small crush on him (though this doesnt last more than a fleeting moment, especially from her perspective). vs raven, whose 'poor impulse control' warning tattoo eventually elicits a sarcastic remark from hiro after he finds out raven and y.t. were "a thing". i really dont think hiro knew how far it went? like it was just suuuper weird, but i figured it was meant narratively to 1. execute the chekovs gun of y.t.'s anti-assault device, 2. contrast hiro and raven (especially considering the bike-racing argument where theyre telling the story together, which is supposed to parallel them, while contrasting the differences in how they ended up?), and 3. just to get raven unconscious, i guess. but good god it was weird and i hated every second of it, why couldnt the device have like, activated way earlier?? gah. fucking upsetting. moving past that!

honestly i was really frustrated by how little screentime juanita got, because the way she was introduced was so fucking interesting and then shes mostly off doing her own thing. the bits of explanation she gives at the end about what she was up to on the raft are so sparse and im like damn, can we get a little bit of her pov in here? please? that would have ruled. additionally, shes supposed to be hiros love interest, but we see so little of them interacting outside her intro scenes. a huge portion of why hiro is getting into the sumerian mythology is literally framed as something that will help him understand juanita, but we dont get to see him talk to her about it barely at all.

the supporting characters were quite fun, i particularly liked the librarian. big surprise, i liked the overly literal ai information-dispensor, lmfao. watching him and hiro interact reminded me SO hard of geordi laforge having honest to god conversations with the computer where he tries to coax information out of it, aka one of my favorite little aspects of tng.

and lastly, the major plot themes themselves. i adore the way stephenson approached action, it was very entertaining. usually i cant really visualize action scenes written out, but his use of language was really really effective and engaging. the plot itself was absolutely fascinating, though i found the premise pretty contrived. which isnt bad in itself, i was fully suspending my disbelief until the last hundred pages or so. which for a 550+ page book, isnt too bad.

i did like the approach of linking the ancient to the modern, that is always really neat. and i think ultimately stephenson did it in an interesting way, not how i would have done it, but definitely interesting! creating these ideas about information infrastructures, and there being words that can access those and be used to control people, was wild. not sure if i agree about the equating of religion to a virus, though he did specifically establish that it was more the approach to religion, than religion itself. (maybe if juanita had been more goddamn present in the narrative that could have been elaborated on a little more. literally her perspective would have been perfect in balancing that out!!)

ultimately what did me in was the very very very long winded MONOLOGUE where hiro re-explained the whole premise, in ways that didnt really neatly organize into a cohesive argument. a lot of the scenes where hiro talks to the librarian, which are interspersed throughout the book, are really exposition heavy, because stephenson is rooting his ideas in historical concepts that need to be explained to both hiro and the audience. and i thought all that was fine, because it was a conversation where hiro was grappling with the information, and he was figuring it out along with the reader, and most importantly it was a conversation between him and the librarian computer program.

howeverrr later on we get a full rehash of all that, where hiro makes clear some stuff that was just implied for the reader, and hes literally just telling these important men whats up in this big long monologue. utterly worthless. i kept reading it and going YEAH, we KNOW, we know this we know this. and the important men barely interjected. it added basically nothing to our understanding of the situation, other than reframing it. but everything added was already an implicit thing, and didnt really need to be said again.

the resolution to the book was stellar, the last 30-40 pages, once hiro is onto the raft, were great. ultimately after reading and giving some time to digest it, i think it was a solidly great book with a few big drawbacks near the end, but which dont carry through and sully the ending.

[indecisive-behaviors]

Okay so I just reblogged a thing talking about season 2 and 3 of Cobra Kai and I have some Thoughts about what they did to everyone’s character arcs in this so if you’d like a rant it’s under the cut with spoilers from all 3 seasons plus spoilers for all 3 Karate Kid movies

Okay so my issues start with one very key scene that I personally think fucked up the whole rest of the narrative, and by extension everyone else’s character arcs: which is from Different but Same. And no not that scene- not yet at least.

The first scene that I think fucked over the narrative and killed several character arcs was the beach scene. Miguel, reasonably distraught over the idea that Sam is hiding him from her dad(which she is actually doing to be fair), gets completely drunk and when Sam and Robby arrive together he loses it, pushes Sam and subsequently gets dumped. Now why do I think this ruined everything? It completely goes against Miguel’s character up to this point. Miguel is absolutely trying to mimic Johnny in a lot of key ways but also up to this point Miguel has also been Johnny’s conscience; he’s smart and kind and had not at all shown to be anything even close to what Johnny was in KK1. He’s stood up for his friends, defended the girl he likes from bullies, he’s a huge mama’s boy and a bit of a hopeless romantic. In no episode up until that point does he ever display any tendency towards unnecessary violence, despite Johnny’s “strike first” motto. Miguel getting wasted and violent does not add up in my mind. Miguel is supposed to be a narrative parallel to Daniel for fuck sake. Also, and this is my main complaint, there is no fucking reason for Miguel to immediately jump to the conclusion that Sam is seeing Robby- literally none. They look very much alike, hell Robby looks a little like Amanda honestly, he could very well be her cousin for all Miguel knows. Robby and Sam don’t even act like a couple in the shot- they’re literally just sitting next to each other at family dinner. None of this subplot makes any fucking sense.

And then, obviously, there’s the very next scene- Johnny goes with Daniel back to his place, tipsy and happy and seemingly in a very good place with each other. Then Robby shows up, Johnny loses his shit and Daniel proceeds to get pissed and kick Robby out. Now there is one thing I point out about this scene whenever I talk about it that doesn’t add up: no where in this scene is it ever even implied that either Johnny or Daniel know about Robby’s original intentions. (Also nothing up till that point ever even establishes why Robby knows about Daniel and Johnny’s rivalry in the first fucking place for the record). There is no reason for Johnny to suspect that Daniel knew and was hiding it, or even that Robby was doing it on purpose, and there is no reason for Daniel to get mad or even suspect that Robby knew what he was doing or was lying about it; and the fact of the matter is that Robby never actually lied(also Daniel never fucking asked) about his home situation. His mom was neglectful and an addict, and his father wasn’t in the picture. That’s it, and none of that was a lie. Now I’m not sitting here and denying that what Robby did was wrong because it absolutely was-- it was manipulative and unfair to Daniel and he had a right to be angry when he found out it was the case but there is nothing to suggest that he didn’t just jump to conclusions. And also, personally, I don’t think any of that justifies kicking a teenager to the curb, and one that Daniel explicitly knows has no one and nothing to fall back on. Be angry, be furious with Robby, but leaving a teenager to fend for themselves is cruel and completely unjustifiable behavior from a grown ass adult(also there’s a whole can of worms involved in Daniel never trying to figure out where the fuck Robby’s parents are and letting him live there without an explanation but that’s for a different rant).

Now assume none of that weird subplot happens, there is another way to have the Robby and Miguel rivalry that would have made so much more fucking sense and it only hinges on one fucking thing- Robby enters the tournament. It could be with or without Daniel’s approval(maybe even with a KK3 parallel, but Daniel honestly seems pretty into the tournament these days so he’d probably be down for Robby joining and reping Miyagi-do), but all we need is for him to do it.  Robby gets there, and Johnny sees him, potentially rocking a Miyagi-do gi and can have his surprised/hurt moment with him and Daniel, even potentially a confrontation between them. We can also still have Miguel beating Robby in the tournament and having Johnny be conflicted about his son losing. Hawk can even still hurt him and give Johnny his “holy shit this is wrong” epiphany and Miguel not understanding why Johnny wants him to go easy on Robby. Robby can still be hurt and upset by thinking Johnny cares more about Miguel after he loses.

Okay now as for season 2? Assuming everything stays the same in season 1, I have one MAJOR complaint. Robby becoming Sam’s love interest; and no it’s not because I think Miguel and Sam should be an endgame couple when the show is over(I do but that’s beside the point) but because it turns Sam into a plot device. This carries over into season 3 where she starts dating Miguel again and apparently just never breaks it off with Robby which is such a dick move I can not for the life of me imagine Sam of all fucking people doing it. She isn’t perfect by any means but she’s also outspoken and and much more confident by that point and should not have had a problem breaking up with someone in an email. But I digress, back to season 2- the moment I saw that Sam and Robby were going to be a couple I immediately knew the writers fucked up. There was no build up for it, nothing in season 1 to foreshadow this as a possibility(Different but Same doesn’t count because that was a whiplash of an episode) and they just decided offhandedly to put her in the middle of Robby’s and Miguel’s rivalry. There was no reason to make them a couple other than to fuck with Miguel and set up the Tory & Sam rivalry which could have happened fucking anyway with the shit at the country club, the rift between Sam and Aisha, and Miguel’s ongoing feelings for Sam even after he’s dating Tory(also a dick move what the fuck Miguel??). Adding Robby as fuel to the fire was super unnecessary and all it did was set up the clusterfuck that was the season 2 finale.

And OH BOY was that finale a clusterfuck. First of all, as a prelude- Fuck. Daniel. He pulled the exact same shit as in season 1 with dumping Robby the second he does anything even a little bit wrong. But also, as a gut punch, Robby didn’t actually do anything wrong. What was he supposed to do at the party? He couldn’t stop Sam from drinking even though he wanted to, it was her (very poor) choice. But he did what he could, he kept an eye on her, and when the cops showed up, he didn’t just leave her, he put her in the car and drove her somewhere he thought she’d be safe without having to immediately face her father(who super fucking overreacted btw) while she was recovering. This scene, which could have been an excellent bonding moment for Johnny and Robby, and an introduction to Sam getting to know Johnny outside of her father’s influence, was turned into a brawl for no fucking reason. 

Which leads me to the school fight. And right off the bat I’ve got to say this; even as, and maybe especially as, a person who has written post season 3 fix it fics, there is no way for Robby and Miguel to convincingly fix what happened in the season 2 finale. Yes, what Robby did was absolutely an accident and he has already done his time for it. But the elephant in the room is this: Miguel could have died. Or at the very least, been totally paralyzed. There is not a good way to come back from that. They will always have that hanging over their heads, even if they somehow reach an understanding. And I know someone is going to try and make the argument about that being a parallel to Johnny and Daniel in KK1, but if it is that it’s a terrible parallel. What Johnny did was supremely fucked up and I won’t deny that, especially with the Halloween scene and Daniel’s knee in the tournament(which actually was technically more Bobby’s doing, but I digress), but it was never “almost permanently disable/kill someone” bad. (Again there’s a whole can of worms to open about the shit with Chozen and Daniel’s seemingly pretty easy forgiveness of a man who tried to kill him because what the fuck?? But again that’s another rant.) But the writers wanted to push the envelope so now Johnny will always have the tug of war of choosing Robby, who he loves but who also really fucked up, and Miguel, who was the original reason for the rivalry in the first place but who was also the one who, again, almost died because of his son, even if he somehow fixes his relationship with both. It will always be “why did you pick him over me?” and Johnny will never have a good enough answer for either of them. And finally the big complaint- Johnny completely regressing in season 3. Season 3 honestly felt like a rehashing of season 1 because we literally had to see him progress in his arc all over again from square fucking one. He still isn’t there for Robby, he’s still fucking up things with Miguel and his family, he’s still fucking up his relationship with Daniel, he still chooses to miss his appointment with Robby to see Miguel(who would have been there after the appointment and he could have seen him then), he abandons half of his fucking students to fend for themselves and leaves the other half with a man he knows is a dangerous psychopath. And yes we get the cool scene at the end of December 19, but is it worth it?? I’m genuinely asking because, as much as I love that scene, I really don’t believe it is.(edit: Also fuck that whole subplot with Eli and Demetri- you don’t get to just break the arm of the boy who was your best friend and just have that go away with no repercussions. Fuck. That. I hope Demetri gets at minimum an actual on screen apology, and hopefully Eli actually trying to make amends.)

We could have still had the big team up- have Johnny admit to Daniel that he’s fucked up and tell him everything that’s happening with Kreese. Have them join forces to defeat Kreese in the tournament. Have the dumb fucking bet. Introduce Terry Silver in season 4. Have Johnny’s and Daniel’s tenuous truce strained at every turn because they’re idiots. Do all of it. But y’know what? We could have had all of that- all of it- without it being at the expense of at least 2 character arcs; Johnny’s and also Robby’s.

Also before I end this I just have to add- nothing and I mean nothing will ever redeem Kreese or Silver for me. I do not give a singular shit about either of their tragic backstories, I just don’t. I get why and how Chozen got his redemption- he was a teenager when that shit happened, and while the shit he pulled is personally unforgivable in my opinion, he has actively been trying to redeem himself by spending the last however many decades making it up to his community. I’d even understand a Barnes redemption to an extent, even though I wouldn’t accept it, because he was also very young and being manipulated by, again, a dangerous psychopath. But Kreese and Silver? Abso-fucking-lutely not. They were two grown ass adults who purposefully targeted an 18 year old and put him through emotional and physical for weeks, paid someone to intimidate him through both threats of physical violence but also through vandalism, and gaslighted him and isolated him from the only family he had at the time because he beat them in a children’s karate competition. Look, I’m not sorry, I don’t give a fuck about Kreese’s tragic backstory, nothing about what Kreese has done can be rationalized by just saying “oh his mom and girlfriend died and he was in ‘Nam”. And any good thing he does for Tory, or even Robby, does not balance out all the harm he has caused. Silver is even less redeemable- I don’t care that he almost died in war, I’m an army brat I know plenty of people who almost died and don’t act like this. In canon we have evidence of him being completely, unrepentantly evil- the first scene with him in it has him basically confirmed as the BP of nuclear waste, he pays people so he can beat them up, he’s been personally funding Kreese’s child indoctrination classes. They could pull out the saddest backstory for him possible and I would not give a shit. And that’s fine. We don’t need every bad guy to have a tragic backstory- sometimes an evil villain can just be an evil villain for no reason, not all of them need a traumatic turning point that the authors shove in to make the audience sympathize with them. So please, writers, stop trying to make me feel sorry for them because I really don’t and I don’t understand anyone who does.

Okay rant over.

[rpbetter]

Is it okay to vent? I've been modding an rp group with friends and recently, I really haven't felt like things have been fair? Everything feels like it's swinging in favor towards a particular character of a person made recently mod and I hate it. It's also like there are several people very quiet in the group now and I've made like observations that might be concerning and brought it up, but no one seems to listen to me? I'm honestly just wishing I could care less right now bc while the original mod group was a group of friends, I'm struggling with feeling apart of it now and torn between going radio silence or forcing myself to expend effort more in hopes I'll actually feel like I have friends again.

Any time, Anon!

That is definitely an uncool situation right there, I'm sorry that's happening. If it makes you feel any better, I'm very sure that a lot of others understand too well what you're going through. I know I do! I wish I knew what the solid answer was to the entire, far too prevalent issue with RP groups failing for such reasons is, as well as this too frequently happening in any group of mods of anything, but I don't think there is just one answer that can be applied.

More specifically, though...to be painfully honest with you? The only thing here you can control is yourself. I know the suggestion should be a redundant and assumptive "have you tried talking to them more directly, you probably weren't direct enough" but lol you literally said you have brought this up and I don't feel like any number of times rehashing the way in which you've done so is going to make them listen. I'm not advising you to not try that, but I am advising you to not expect different results - only do that if it's going to help you move on. (Like, feeling a sense of well, I tried my best and they are not in a place to care, so, I'm done.)

I sincerely wish there was a way to just not feel things, not care about things, especially when you logically know it probably shouldn't dig at you as badly as it is! If anyone out there finds a secret to this, we're all dying to know, please share! But what you can do is slowly detach from the situation, and I think this might be best.

I know it was a friend group, I know how badly this hurts and how unfair it is...how it sort of changes the landscape of your RP time, too. I think, even if we do not consciously realize it, it's a goal most of us have to establish a good friend group we RP with, just like we establish friend groups in games. We feel so much more comfortable with this group of people we can enjoy all aspects of RP with, because let's face it, it can be a kind of odd thing to discuss with other people if they do not RP, even in a fandom. We also tend to develop our muses and our writing with our friends, naturally. So, achieving that only to lose it is tough, and it's tough no matter how many times it happens to you.

However, I really meant it when I said I don't think they're in a place to listen. Obviously, I'm not there in your RP group, I'm not seeing what is going on, I'm not hanging out with your friends (I mean? Probably? lol the RPC can be vast yet so tiny), but going off of what you've said and what I've experienced, that's really what I feel here. People have a simple tendency, in all group situations, to not be ready to see something as a problem until it's well past being easily addressed. Trying to force it into their field of vision is likely to make them angry and to see them more obstinately ignoring it.

Some reasons for that are not wanting to argue/fear of ruining things, genuinely being oblivious to the issue, enjoying the factors that are an issue for others, and favoritism. These are not things you can change. All you can do, as far as trying to address it again, is to figure out which of these/which combination is going on with the person in the group most likely to listen to you so that you can better talk to them. Whether you agree with them or not, understanding where someone is coming from is helpful to speaking with them. You can better phrase things so they're not triggering negative emotions.

For example, let's say you feel like it's a combination of this hypothetical one friend enjoying what is making others upset (let us say that this new member writes something with their muse they enjoy) and that it's become favoritism because of this and/or other factors (they're the one who brought them into the group, they were already a friend). Okay, so, now you have an idea of what you can say that won't prod at any feelings of accusation, jealousy, or even their own guilt.

Instead of: "Listen, I know x is your favorite person and you will always choose them over everyone else, but this is a real problem and I need you to hear me about it."

Try: "Hey, I'm needing to talk to you because I feel like this is such a serious issue. I've tried to discuss it with the entire group, but I've not been listened to and I know the group RP is as important to you as it is to me. I really enjoy x as well, they do y great and they're so z, but the way that the focus of the group has swung entirely to their character is a big problem for many in the group. If you've noticed, the activity of several others has dropped off. People feel they're not being listened to and that their characters and bits in the storyline aren't of equal importance anymore. What do you think we can do about this?"

Right out of the gate, you're expressing that you know they like this other person, but you don't dislike them or anything, you dislike what has happened in the situation. You've also given them the (correct) impression that this is endangering the RP, and that they are someone you feel is both interested and reasonable enough to want to fix the problem.

Again, do not expect that it's going to change anything, but if it'd make you feel better to try one more time, do it.

The problem so often with being a mod, even among a friend group who are also mods, is that moderators are very often set up only to act in the event of such extreme drama that the others won't want to deal with it. As a mod, you feel (again, correctly) that it's your job to...you know, moderate. That doesn't just mean disputes, it also means pre-dispute situations like this, among other things. However, the actual top moderator complaint is always that they're not listened to unless it's a problem that has kind of imploded the group. The kind of problem the rest of the group doesn't want to resolve for fear of seeming to play favorites or, frankly, fear of looking like a bitch. This is absolutely something that will put devastating cracks into the RP group, but since it isn't crumbling it rapidly yet...they'd probably rather that you just ignore it. Then, are rather likely to either drop the RP or want you to resolve it magically because you're the one who brought it up way back when it fixable.

So, we're back to "it's not a problem you can fix or control despite your position" yes.

And we can go back to what you can do to mitigate your own upset somewhat, also, yes. :D

There's this whole thing about ripping off the bandaid that just isn't applicable to all situations. (It isn't even applicable to all literal injury situations, damn.) This is one of them for a lot of people. Slowly distancing yourself so you can start putting energy into things that will return your investment of time, creativity, friendship might be better for you than just abruptly going radio silent, or even more drastically, leaving.

Don't engage with the group RP as often or in as timely a manner, be less of a presence there. It's difficult at first, but see, when you feel the drive to be there, you then use it for something else. If you have other RPs outside of this, reply to one of them instead. If you don't, start seeking out new partners/RPs instead. You have other RPs but they all owe you right now? Not a problem, do some character development. Whatever keeps you from spending as much time there.

As you do this, it's much easier to not be there. Just drop in to do what you have to. It becomes difficult, eventually, to be bothered to do so, I promise. A lot of other things you did not like that you were tolerating because these are your friends and this is something you enjoy, they'll become obnoxiously obvious. You know what else either will or won't? Them missing you being there.

If they do miss your presence and friendship, that's great! That's the best outcome. It might put into sharper perspective how bad the issue was, they might be more willing to address the problem now, make it a dedicated effort to not show that kind of attention to just one member's character/one member.

If they do not, then that does very much hurt. This is, unfortunately, how many friendships in the RPC decline. Not heated arguments, but rather, quiet inattention and replacement. If this happens, I'm so sorry, Anon. I can say all day long the total truth of the matter, that it wasn't the best group for friendship longevity and you can at least take the memories and lessons with you, but it won't stop it from stinging. However, because you have started to make other things your priority, it does lessen the upset.

Either way, this is a really frustrating situation! I think you've kind of answered what you need to do just in the phrasing here, "I'm struggling with feeling apart of it now and torn between going radio silence or forcing myself to expend effort more in hopes I'll actually feel like I have friends again." When we start feeling like have to force ourselves to expend more effort out of desperation to feel friendship like we once did, that's not a situation we should stay in. Sometimes, we just need to vent about it and see it pointed out to us to realize it, you know? Because it is hard to lose our friends and comfort zones, even when they've soured.

Maybe trial run slow distancing, just responding to the people who also feel like they're being left out, perhaps? Until the situation improves or you feel like you can move on easier. Nothing about this is going to be painless, but you can at least insulate yourself a bit while leaving the ball visibly in their court - I expressed this was a problem, it was ignored and is an ongoing problem, so, I'm not as invested anymore and it is up to you now to stay on that track or demonstrate some changes.

I hope that whatever happens, it's good for you! Even if it feels awful for a while, I hope it's eventually great. Maybe it's the thing you need to find an even better group, you never know until happens! I also hope that my delay in response didn't make things worse for you, please know I've felt really guilty about it despite not being able to get online :| I know just being seen at the moment you're feeling so frustrated and down helps so much!

[mrpenguinpants]

Alright, I finally read Reincarnation no Kaben

AFTER MONTHS (it’s probably been a month? My mind doesn’t keep track of the days) I FINALLY CAUGHT UP TO RNK. Ty to Okita anon for the recommendation (*￣3￣)╭💕💕💕 I absolutely loved it. 

After this I’ll start on the other recommendation you gave me. I kept a bit of a log of my reading journey under the read more tag. 

Major spoilers for literally everything in RNK up to ch 53 “Withdrawal”. 

Oh, and I’ll finish answering all my leftover asks and I SHOULD have a fic done by tomorrow. I was so ready to write and then I got up. Now I’m back to bed. 

I’m just gonna write this as a log since I read super super slow and I’m only on ch 7 at the start of writing this but I’m really liking it already. Though to be fair. I love everything okita anon recommends haha. I remember you saying you were simping over Kouu and I haven’t gotten to the part where he appears but I wanted to quickly google what he looked like to prepare myself and I see this:

Well. That’s reassuring. 

I was actually kinda surprised by how many western figures were in the manga since I know there are only like 7? Around 7 western figures that pop up in any anime/manga but seeing people like Albert Fish was kinda surprising but I really liked it. Also, at the end of certain chapters they write little bio’s on them so you get to know more about them was such a nice touch.  I also love that the tradition of making males -> females still stays strong even outside the fate universe hehe.

---

Literally, the next chapter I see him. AHHHHHHHHH. Well maybe not him but his eyeballs. 

This guy lowkey reminds me of the MC’s brother but it’s 99% because he has the same long ponytail. I wouldn’t be surprised if the brother was apart of the the Greats. Honestly, Ein reminds me of those really hard headed girls that are actually really kind on the inside but aren’t good at expressing themselves (maybe because that’s pretty much her character). I also like that Ein doesn’t like males but she’s hiding behind this guy. At least, I’m..99% sure this is Ein. 

I FUCKING KNEW IT. AS SOON AS I SAW HE GOT A THEIF TALENT I COULD FEEL THE SOLO LEVELING VIBES IN ME. HE CAN STEAL TALENTS I FUCKING KNEW IT!!! I’m surprised that Neumann didn’t say anything and  Haito seems to be aware of it.  

Edit: Ah okay, I understand a bit now but it almost seems like Haito is the only one aware of Toya’s second talent.

Edit 2: Okay, as much as I love power hungry MC’s I’m really glad they didn’t make Toya into that. I am such a softie for sympathetic and kind MC’s like these even though it’s been done so many times. I’m really glad this didn’t feel like a rehash. I mean, some points some of the stuff Toya says it does but it’s fine, I don’t mind that. I actually gave a crap about him since I usually prefer the side characters (I UNDERSTAND ANON, I CARE ABOUT KOUU SO MUCH AHHHHH) but HAITO?? AHHHHH. 

---

I like that Izo always has the same hat in every adaptation he’s in lol. Istg, cats are always op. Schrodinger seems so strong and the parallel universes are my absolute shit. Sometimes I think, in one universe I did this and in this universe I’m not. Would I rather stay in this universe or be in the one where I am actually productive. Usually I pick the productive universe and actually work but sometimes I’m a bit of a slacker haha. I think this is my approach to a lot of things in life. But I digress, I don’t wanna get too deep into my life. 

I can sorta sympathize with the sinners. At least the ripper guy to say the least. I love love love unhinged characters that just want to basically destroy the world or at least have fun. But then you find out- wait they are actually sympathetic oh no. That’s how I felt about Djoser in “im the great priest imhotep” (please...i beg...someone read this...I’m so starved). 

As much as character development and rooting for the hero is cool and all, I just want to simp for the crazy “let’s burn the world to the ground” kinda character. I’m also so glad Toya doesn’t automatically become evil and try and steal everyone’s talents because he does seem like a good person and I really don’t see him suddenly switching fields so when he saved (I don’t remember names I’m sorry), the undead solider it was really nice. Proves that he still has his humanity and isn’t strictly relying on the branch of sin. 

It makes sense that he wants to steal talents since he never had one (and it was kinda out of left field when he killed Vlad and we just never addressed that ever again haha) but to see him actually consider his actions and if he actually want’s to steal his teammates talents feels right to me. Poor guy doesn’t seem to have a lot of friends so this is the first time he’s ever seemed to have companionship, aside from Haito, so I really hope he doesn’t attempt to steal their talents. I think I’m thinking of the slime? That time I got reincarnated as a slime manga/anime. Where he’s the pokemon catcher of skills. I thought that was where it was going. 

But I do kinda like how selfish Haito and Toya’s talent stealing relationship is (I mean, later it develops but my first draft of writing this I wasn’t there yet). I’m not sure if selfish or like self-gratitude/pride is the right word but it’s kind of a breath of fresh air. Rather than Haito trying to contain or “help” Toya’s inferiority she’s actually encouraging it and using her own talent for her own...acknowledgement? Er, yeah let’s go with that. 

---

This. This interaction. I love this. Like, genuinely love this. We need more of this. Two people from opposite sides finding some common ground and their fight to the death is less about morals or whose on whose side but for themselves. I love that. This is actually some wholesome stuff. 

Edit: AHHHHH CATCH MY UGLY CRYING IN THE BACK BECAUSE ALL THE “SINNERS” ARE ACTUALLY AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. IM DEAD. YOU’VE KILLED ME. 

---

I KNEW IT! YOU CAN NEVER TRUST THESE KIND OF PEOPLE!! I’m going to slap the whiteboard on this but if I see any “goofy” character I’m immediately sus of them. 

As much as I hate that Hitler is getting drawn as a small child I really like this. I know the whole, oh I killed your friends but I’m letting you go because you express humanity but I’m gonna finish my death with a sympathetic line, can be annoying to people but idk I really liked this. 

Honestly this and the undead soldiers death hit me hard ngl. This manga might not have my favourite art style during some points compared to like main stream manga but it has some really beautiful scenes. 

BOOM CALLED IT, though it’s pretty obvious lol. 

THE PONY TAIL NEVER LIES AND HES DA VINCI IT MAKES SENSE NOW

He looks so cute lol. I like that Seiya has the talent of being talented in everything while Toya has the talent to steal other talents. Seiya can probably only cap his power by his own physical/mental abilities with Toya can pull a solo leveling and go further beyond. Thinking of it like jack of trades vs master of none type deals. Though, I might be thinking too hard on this. I like that this man is actually humble but I really wish there was a tiny bit more to him since we only get this one interaction/backstory but the manga isn’t completed yet. I really hope we get to know about Seiya more;; like how he became da vinci or etc. 

Everytime I see Neumann I look at that comic sans type and it kills me on the inside. But I love that her eyes are 01 just, mwah perfection. These little details that aren’t that big but it’s soooo nice. I also ahem, unhinged character heart be still. It’s really nice reading manga in bursts because you can see the art progression and damn does she look good. 

tiny fang appreciation post. 

ngl i’M HARD SIMPING FOR THIS MAN. It’s the pony tail, I have such a thing for guys with long hair (and this is why genshin broke me) but man the art really picked up here. 

I didn’t get into it but OKITA ANON I GET IT. KOUU??? AHHHH. WHY DID YOU HAVE TO DIE??? As much as his whole “war” was a bit questionable in the beginning and tbh I still don’t really get it I like that he knows he’s not the same as the other Greats but still tries to help the other “sinners” in a way only he knows. That’s why Seiya was so important;; I get that he wanted them to have a fun death and to be understood but idk, the whole war idea and having them kill each other (especially the Hitler fights because I understand the others since they reached some kind of acknowledgement) but nonetheless, what a great guy.

Nightingale gives me mad masaki vibes from chainsawman. I hate them and I can’t wait for you to fail, but the inner part of my is cheering for you because unhinged characters are my shit. I feel really bad for Neumann, I had suspicions she wasn’t actually like that since it’s sooo out of left field but I’m really glad the manga seems to know what it’s doing. I really wish we got more Kouu interactions with everyone tho. 

NOW THIS. THIS IS SOME WHOLESOME STUFF. I WANT THIS. I REALLY WANT SPIN-OFF OF REALLY SAD ANIME/MANGA/STORIES WHERE ALL THE DEAD PEOPLE HANG OUT. That’s how I’m feeling about JJK and the scroll segments or BSD WAN that just came out. IT’S SO WHOLESOME TO SEE EVERYONE NOT TRYING TO KILL EACH OTHER. 

UGLY SOBBING IN THE CLUBBB AND KOUU AND CHARLOTTE AHHHH. I hate how this is phrased but the respect I have for Hitler?? YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW HARD THAT IS TO TYPE?? Kitazuka is cool tho, I really like him. Some god given talent. I’m hard simping over him but I really hope we get to know more about him later. 

Getting smug mona vibes, I love this. 

AHHH IVE NEVER FELT THIS UPSET OVER AN APPLEEEE. I’M ACTUALLY UPSET. IF HE DIES IM ACTUALLY GOING TO CRY MY HEART OUT. 

THE FAMOUS SLAP 

I’M SORRY WHA- SLENDERMAN?

Oh..wow. Okay, be still my heart. When I first saw her I thought she was really pretty but now I’m absolutely smitten. God damn, can I please have some more crumbs on these characters before they die;; 

AHHH SAME GIRL FUCKING SAME????? I adore these small panels and translator notes. It’s a real breather after the sad 3am hours talk these characters go through. 

Yagyuu. Jesus christ. WHY ARE ALL THE DEATH SCENES IN THIS MANGA ACTUALLY SO PRETTY AND STABS ME IN THE HEART??? that’s it. goodbye. im fucking out. im actually so upset rn. WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME? 

---

In conclusion, and I should probably re-read what the characters say and not go off on memory because I’m about to get really deep. I really like how they phrased why they wanted to stop the branch of sin. That there are people just like Toya and Haito who, if they never found the branch of sin, could still probably lead respectable and okay lives. That there was a “them” in another universe that didn’t go down that road and that they want to be in the same universe as “them”. I know this sounds really confusing if you haven’t read the manga but going back to what I said about the parallel universe stuff. 

There was a universe where Toya and Haito didn’t rely on the branch of sin, that even without their talents from becoming a returner, they could still live a happy life given their own personalities and attitudes. It was kinda moving since in the beginning, Toya wanted a talent so badly and now that he has one. He’s realizing that wait, I don’t need a past life talent in order to live. Honestly, I hard relate to that because I totally agree with him. If you have a talent you can probably live a very happy and comfortable life that other factors wouldn’t matter if you just have that incredible talent. Thinking of it as a painter or artist, if you had actual god-given talent you wouldn’t need to worry about other factors since people would naturally seek that talent. So you end up comparing yourself to others and setting that limit on yourself. 

But that’s okay, it’s completely natural and I’m not saying it’s horrible if you do this. Fuck, I do this all the time. I’m not saying the manga is changing my life but it’s kind of refreshing that it get’s talked about since other adaptations of this just make the character super OP. I understand wanting to have that incredible talent, fuck who doesn’t? but you don’t need it in order to live earnestly in the bigger picture sense. Not everything you do has to be productive and honestly, learning to be okay with having fun is nice. Just being okay with who you are right now, even if it isn’t perfect in your eyes, you still have time to build upon yourself and your own talents but doing it for yourself. 

But I probably missed the point and I’m going way to deep haha. But I really enjoyed reading this and thank you once again to okita anon for the recommendation^^ I always love everything you send me and I’ll start reading the next one. If anyone else has any recommendations let me know! 

[hypexion]

The Timeless Children is the culmination of not just Series Twelve, but perhaps all of modern Doctor Who. Once again, the canon will be permanently altered, until a new showrunner comes along to change it. Nothing will be the same or different again!

Then again, what irks me about the Timeless Child stuff is that it distracts from the fact that The Timeless Children is a pretty poor conclusion to the whole Lone Cyberman arc that’s been going on. Ashad, who should probably be the main antagonist, gets killed halfway through to enable the Master to enact his lastest Master plan. The good news is that his plan is still Cyberman related, so all the Doctor’s terrible trauma still applies when he reveals his army of “Cybermasters“. But then the Doctor ends up in another inescapable situation, leading to the cop-out where Ko Sharmus shows up to die in the Doctor’s place. It’s a bit of a retread of The Doctor Falls, where the Doctor is in a position that is completely fatal, yet can’t actually die because she’s the main character. Everything just sort of falls apart right at the end, and it’s not very impressive.

Really, the only character who comes out ahead in this episode is the Master. Sure, he loses, but when he’s not being a giggling madman, Sacha Dhawan gives the character a very strong performance. Underneath the now-overplay “look how cRaZy the Master is“ stuff is something deeper and more interesting. His disappointment that the Death Particle doesn’t activate, his conversion with the Doctor when they arrive on Gallifrey, and “the rage and pain in [his] hearts“ all suggest that the truth of the Timeless Child is deeply upsetting to him. Beyond just “oh no I owe existing to the Doctor“, which was already true before all of this. It’s enough to wonder if the Master’s more manic side is a mask, some thing he plays up, just as the Doctor covers her own trauma with a facade of positivity. What ever the truth is, the Master has become a man tormented by what he’s learn, who has lashed out at anyone who might possibly be connected in an attempt to reassert control of his own existence.

Other characters are around, but don’t do that much. Ryan successfully throws a ball, and Graham says nice things about Yaz. Yaz then says that Graham is okay, which due to her upbringing is actually a very nice thing to say. Consider applying this metric to the already very nice things she says about the Doctor to discover a new ship. The future characters are also around, but one dies immediately, and Ko Sharmus basically absorbs all the personality allocated for side characters. Which is good for him, because it makes him a cool guy who justifies his screentime, but less so for the other characters.

So, the Timeless Child. The whole mystery thing that The Timeless Children is apparently built around. Once again, the Doctor is the most super-special person in the universe, due to the “Chibnall Masterplan“. It’s a big deal that completely overhauls the known lore, all to deal with a single scene in The Brain of Morbius. Is it really any different from all the other times the Doctor was the most important person in the universe? Only the Master actually seems to care, and while the Doctor might be a little discombobulated at first, she soon snaps back to reality.

Here’s the thing. The Timeless Child reveal is something that feels like it’s a big deal. A big secret about the Time Lord’s history is revealed, and the Doctor is right in the middle of it. Except, is she really? While the Doctor might be the Timeless Child, can it be said that the Timeless Child is the Doctor? All of the TC’s memories were erased to create the person who would become the Doctor. After that they had a childhood, an education, met the Master and had a family, before finally fleeing Gallifrey, maybe because of The Hybrid (who might be the Cyberium-Master actually?). There’s no continuity of identity - whoever the TC might have been, the Doctor is a separate person. This is even presented as a possibility by the episode - the Rth Doctor says that being the Timeless Child doesn’t matter, and Thirteen agrees. So far, this revelation does not matter in-universe.

And from a meta sense, is the Timeless Child anything more than a rehash of The Hybrid? Messing with the Doctor’s origins is a time-honoured tradition of Doctor Who. The name “Theta-Sigma“ was first used by a guy who popped out of a hole in The Armageddon Factor. The so-called “Cartmel Masterplan“, had the show not been cancelled before it could get going, would have coyly hinted that the Doctor was in fact connected to the origins of Gallifrey (and let us be honest: the execution would have actually been as subtle as brick to the face). Additionally, modern Doctor Who hasn’t shied away from presenting the Doctor in an almost divine manner. The Timeless Children sits upon the sins of Last of the Timelords, Voyage of the Damned, A Good Man Goes to War, The Day of the Doctor, and a myriad of other episodes, each portraying the Doctor as something more godlike than they ever should be. The Timeless Child isn’t new - in fact, it’s just directly stating what modern Doctor Who has been implying from the beginning: the Doctor is the most super-special-awesome person in the universe. Not that the Doctor cares.

And of course, nothing Chris Chibnall or anyone else writes can change the real-world fact that William Hartnel was the First Doctor. It’s also true that from an in-universe perspective, the Timeless Child is a Big Deal. But it’s a footnote compared to the hours and days worth of stories about the Doctor, the Time Lord who stole a TARDIS and ran away to see the universe. Until something actually happens because the Timeless Child is a thing, it’s essentially just another piece of throwaway trivia to bring when you feel like starting an argument, a bit like Looms. Things may seem different, but the true is that they’re the same as they’ve always been.

Also given that the Timeless Child stuff literally exists to explain a scene in The Brain of Morbius that already has better explanations, it’s clear that caring too much about continuity is a trap. Free yourself from “canon“ and “established lore” and embrace Doctor Who anarchy! It’s what the Doctor would want.

Ultimately, The Timeless Children fails to provide a statisfying conclusion to the Lone Cyberman arc or itself. It order to fit in the New Big Thing, plotlines are drop or folded into others, in a way that doesn’t quite work. And as for the big reveal? Like the rest of Series Twelve, no one takes the time to care. Except for the Master. Which, in the end, perhaps tells us how much we should care.

[immortalled]

Slapping these all together instead of making a ton of ooc posts, but.... s3e2 live reactions and final thoughts.

- Simon continues to be cute.

- Lowkey wondering if Overman has the pee fetish...

- Kelly and Alisha hanging out and getting ice cream is adorable. I hope we see them actually hang out in this season.

- Alisha is talking SO loudly in the graveyard. Seth is literally just right there. ALISHA PLEASE.

- Even without invisibility Simon manages to scare people by sneaking up behind them lmao love that. Never change, weird little man.

- ???? Okay, I don’t understand why Curtis wants to keep his whole “my power is turning into the opposite sex” thing secret? His friends KNOW that’s his power, why hide what he looks like? Why does it matter? 

- This episode is quickly turning into one of those “uh oh big misunderstanding, now everyone is going to think Simon is cheating on Alisha even though this could have just been solved by talking to each other” plots and... man, that is my least favorite trope. I swear if it turns into this, I’m gonna scream. Curtis, I will throttle you, and then I will throttle Overman.

- ...Cute girl is gonna get Ruthed isn’t she? Gosh, Curtis... c’mon...

- S I G H S. I take it back. Curtis does need to drink his Respect Women Juice. 

- Simon’s looks of horror are pretty golden lol

- OOF OOF OOF. This episode does not shy away from uncomfortable issues women have, huh? Yikes! I feel unsafe just watching lmaooo why’s everyone in this show a creep? Why!! Not a bad thing, it’s realistic, I suppose, but everyone? Everyone? Give me one nice man, Misfits, please. I miss Ben. Bring Ben back.

- Ohhhh, Curtis, honey... This is why women guard their drinks like HAWKS at parties...

- SKGSJGK RUDY SPITTING HIS DRINK INTO A GIRL’S HOOD IS SENDING ME I hate to keep comparing him to Nathan but at this rate I might actually have to make a Nathan/Rudy parallel gifset. That gave me bowling alley flashbacks.

- Emma what the heck?? Who just leaves their girlfriend passed out? Who assumes that was their fault? Excuse me? 

- I AM SO SCARED FOR CURTIS OH NO

- .................I didn’t need to see that. I did not want to see that.

- I swear Curtis better own up to Emma. But now I’m not happy with either of them. Emma shouldn’t have left Curtis, and Curtis should be honest. This is such a mess.

- Simon is a mood. Simon is me. I too have no idea what the heck is going on. Curtis is making everything so difficult.

- Oh my stars, I love Kelly to bits. What a girl, what a pal. 

- However, I am going to throttle Curtis and Overman. I hate this trope so much. Kelly being a bro for Alisha is literally the only good thing about this.

- Well. Curtis is certainly chugging his Respect Women juice now. He’s drowning in it. 

- Seriously, why didn’t Curtis just tell them???

- I’ve said it before, but why do they always choose to film like this? What is this focus? It’s less awful than S1 when they’d put faces partly out of focus when they’re the only thing on screen but??? I really wanna know the thought process.

- Good job Curtis. Go do the right thing. GOOD JOB, DO IT. DON’T SCREW THIS UP.

- O h.

- O h n o.

- This episode is legitimately terrifying. IDK if I can watch this one again. I am so uncomfortable.

- SAVE HER CURTIS OH M Y STARS I HATE THIS

- GOOD YES GOOD THANK YOU BABY 

- Holy crap that revenge though. Deserving, for sure, but. Wow lmao alright, then. 

Final thoughts: That episode was w i l d l y uncomfortable. Lots of nonconsensual stuff, high even for Misfits. It’s not uncomfortable because it’s made out to be a joke, though, but this episode takes it with a shocking amount of seriousness. It’s really good at showing just how scary it can be as a girl and for that reason alone, I don’t know if I can watch this again any time soon lol. It’s just... a little too real. I didn’t expect Misfits of all things to have an episode that tries to teach a moral lesson about consent but, despite its flaws, color me impressed.

My only issue is that I really don’t see why Curtis needed to learn this lesson? Out of all the main male cast, he’s always been pretty considerate and aware. I guess we never get to see too many of his faults since Curtis-centric episodes before have mostly been centered around his time travel power and his guilt over wrecking his athletic career. But... it just seems sort of left field that he’s the one who needs to understand what it’s like to be a woman? IDK. I’m both glad this is an episode because maybe male viewers could learn something, but from a character standpoint, it strikes me as strange lol. If anyone needed this lesson, Nathan (if something similar could have happened in S1 or 2) or Rudy would have been my choice.

Anyway. Not a terrible episode, not a great episode. Squicky. Very squicky. There were times when I felt that some writing was being repeated, too. A few lines and actions from Rudy felt like rehashes of Nathan and some elements reminded me a lot of S1E2, namely the whole issue with Curtis starting a relationship with Emma while he’s in his girl body without telling her who he really is. And then everyone teasing Curtis about the thing with Rudy felt like a weird callback to them teasing Nathan about Ruth. It doesn’t ruin anything, it just really pops out to me when it happens. Not sure if it’s because it’s actually that noticeable or if I’m just extra sensitive to it because I write Nathan and pay the most attention to his scenes.

Despite all that, I’ll say that Simon and Kelly were the real highlights of this episode. Simon had some moments that were just really adorable imo and I love love love Kelly confronting “Melissa” (Curtis’ female persona) when she thinks Simon is cheating on “her” with Alisha, and then she goes after Simon too LOL like. I appreciate a girl who doesn’t let friendship get in the way of ripping into both parties responsible for cheating. It’s also pretty cute that Kelly goes to check on Curtis after it’s all explained and Curtis is upset. That’s sweet. Kelly has such a big heart.

[wrestlingisfake]

Wrestle Kingdom 15 day 1 preview

Tetsuya Naito vs. Kota Ibushi - Naito is defending the IWGP heavyweight championship and the IWGP intercontinental championship.  Whoever holds the two titles after this match will go on to defend them against Jay White on day 2 of Wrestle Kingdom, on January 5.

Naito and Ibushi haven’t met in a singles match since June 9, 2019, when Ibushi lost the intercontinental title to Naito in a match filled with rather dangerous spots.  The point of that match was that both men wanted to hold the intercontinental title long enough to also win the heavyweight belt at Wrestle Kingdom 14.  The obsession with being a double champion culminated in the “Double Gold Dash” mini-tournament, where Naito went 2-0 to win both belts and Ibushi went 0-2, losing in the first round and the consolation match with Jay White.

Since then, Ibushi mounted a major comeback by winning the G1 Climax tournament, earning a Wrestle Kingdom title shot.  However, he lost his title match contract in a match against White on November 7.  Luckily, Naito decided he wanted to wrestle matches on each night of Wrestle Kingdom, and he concluded that Ibushi was still the logical choice for the other title match.  (Ibushi did still win the G1, after all, even if he lost his reward for doing it.)

I’m very worried these guys are going to do sick bumps on their necks, as in the June 2019 match.  Both of them have a bad reputation for doing scary shit.  After the last time I was like “that was really good, please never wrestle again.”  It’s been 19 months (six years in 2020 time) and I’m just now starting to be like “maybe potentially it would be okay to come back with this match, but be careful.”  I don’t really expect them to be careful--these are two guys who always have something to prove, and now they’re going to particularly want to prove they can tear the house down during a pandemic in a stadium show where fans aren’t allowed to shout.

It feels to me like the natural arc of this storyline is for Ibushi to rebound from last year’s defeats by finally winning the titles and finally avenging his losses to Jay White.  But...I expected Kota to go sweep the Double Gold Dash last year, and look what happened.  So I go into this first title match with no confidence that either man is a lock to advance to the second one.  Even when one guy looks to be heading for the finish, I’m going to believe one sudden counter can change everything. 

Will Ospreay vs. Kazuchika Okada - Ospreay is the RPW British heavyweight champion, but it looks like the title is not at stake in this match.  When Ospreay originally issued the challenge for this match, I could’ve sworn he demanded that Okada put his career on the line, but I guess everybody just ignored that.

This feud began on October 16, when Ospreay was still a member of Okada’s stable, CHAOS, and they met in a G1 Climax tournament match.  Bea Priestley and the Great-O-Khan interfered to help Ospreay win, whereupon he turned on Okada to start his own faction, the Empire.  If I went back in time to 2019 and told myself all this was going to happen, past me would assume it’d be way cooler than it’s turned out to be.  (Past me would nonetheless wonder why they’re rehashing the Okada vs. Jay White storyline.)  For years I’ve wanted to see the creation of a totally new faction in NJPW, but the Empire hasn’t lived up to my expectations.

If nothing else, this match itself should be good.  I’m just not convinced anything big will come of it.  If Okada wins, it kind of maintains the status quo where 2021 Ospreay is at the same level as 2020 Ospreay, except he’s a heel.  If Ospreay wins, he gets the rub from Okada but he still has to prove it’s not a fluke like EVIL’s middling run as a top heel.  The easiest way to sidestep all this is to distract everyone with a big angle, like doing a run-in finish with a new guy joining Ospreay’s group. But I’d rather just see a clean match where the guy getting the next push wins clean.

I’ve learned to avoid betting against Okada, and Ospreay’s heel run hasn’t given me a good enough reason to break from that policy.  At least not on this show...

Hiroshi Tanahashi vs. Great-O-Khan - There’s not much to this one.  O-Khan basically beat up Tanahashi a couple of times during the World Tag League & Best of the Super Jr. tour last month.  O-Khan’s gimmick is that he’s a new badass in the tradition of “Mongolian wild man” characters.  Tanahashi’s storyline, for what feels like forever, is that he was the best but he’s old now and his knees are shot and everybody keeps beating up his knees.  So for the 800th time Tana has to prove he can still hang in there with the top guys in the world.

A win for O-Khan would probably be considered a big upset, but I think that’s tainted by how hard they’ve tried to sell that Tana is practically on life support.  Moreover, it doesn’t really feel like they want to push O-Khan that hard--he seems more like an enforcer type than a future main eventer--so I’m not sure he even needs this win for the role he’s slotted into. Tanahashi, on the other hand, really needs a singles victory, if only to build him back up for the next time they do the “does Tana still have it?” story.  So I guess I’m picking Tanahashi to win.

KENTA vs. Satoshi Kojima - Kenta is defending his “right to challenge” contract for a future title match for the IWGP United States championship.  This match was originally booked as Kenta against Juice Robinson, but an orbital bone fracture took Juice off the show.  On any other year, New Japan could probably arrange a more impressive substitute.  But the pandemic and travel restrictions have limited their options, so they’re making do with 50-year-old Kojima.

The IWGP US title has not been defended since February 9, 2020, when Jon Moxley retained against Minoru Suzuki.  Moxley’s commitments to AEW are such that he cannot wrestle a New Japan match in the US, and he can’t fly to Japan long enough to satisfy Japan’s 14-day quarantine policy.  Rather than simply vacate the championship due to inactivity, New Japan has politely ignored the situation in favor of booking Kenta to win this contract in a nifty red briefcase.  I had believed that meant a plan for Mox vs. Kenta was in the works, but as the months went by it became clearer that they couldn’t make it happen. So it looked like Kenta vs. Juice for the contract was the next best thing, and now we don’t even get that.

Kojima was a top guy back in the 2000s, so I don’t mean to be dismissive of him.  But whereas 50+ legends are pushed as unbeatable gods in the US, in Japan they tend to be positioned to put guys over as they slowly accept the twilight of their careers.  Which is fine, to have the old lion prove come back to prove he can hang in there with a guy in his prime.  But they’ve been telling that story constantly with 44-year-old Tanahashi, so doing it again with Kojima feels like overkill.  I suppose an upset win is at least possible, but it would certainly shock the hell out of me.

Zack Sabre Jr. & Taichi vs. Tama Tonga & Tanga Loa - Dangerous Tekkers (Sabre and Taichi) are defending the IWGP heavyweight tag team championship.  The Guerillas of Destiny (Tonga and Loa) won the 2020 World Tag League tournament to earn this match.

For a long time I was thinking the tag title match at Wrestle Kingdom would be David Finlay and Juice Robinson against either GOD or the Tekkers, but I have to admit this match is more interesting.  It feels like every tag title match in New Japan is a straightforward babyface vs. heel dynamic, whereas the singles title matches can have more shades of grey.  So a heel vs. heel tag title match feels fresh.  We’ve seen Sabre and Taichi get heat on every face team available, so how will they adapt when their opponents are pulling dirtier tricks than they do?

These teams met during World Tag League last month, and the Tekkers actually played babyface a bit, which was interesting.  Actually, I get the feeling the Japanese fans have been warming up to Suzuki-gun in general, and Taichi in particular had a cult following for years.  Maybe an exceptionally valiant battle here can turn Sabre and Taichi all the way?

The story for the Guerillas is that, despite their numerous tag title reigns, they had never won World Tag League or walked out of the Tokyo Dome with the tag titles; now they’ve finally got their WTL trophies, so there’s one thing left to do.  If they do win the belts, I’m hoping it will lead to rematches that keep Dangerous Tekkers in the mix.  My fear is that this will be the end of the Tekkers’ run as a team, and it’ll just be GOD vs. FinJuice for a whole year, which doesn’t grow the tag division as well as having three top teams.  Of course, if Sabre and Taichi just win, I don’t have to worry about that, so I guess I’m rooting for them.

Hiromu Takahashi vs. El Phantasmo - Takahashi won the 2020 Best of the Super Jr. tournament, and ELP won the 2020 Super J-Cup tournament; the winner of this match will challenge the IWGP junior heavyweight champion, Taiji Ishimori, on January 5.

I kinda wish this match wasn’t a qualifier for tomorrow’s title bout, because it’s fresher and more compelling than Takahashi vs. Ishimori would be.  (ELP vs. Ishimori would be interesting, except that I’d expect Phantasmo to just lay down for his buddy.)  I’m pretty sure Hiromu and Phantasmo have never met one-on-one before, and ELP’s super-douche style should be very different than anything Hiromu’s lol-random style has contended with.

Phantasmo is one of those heels that trolls so hard I can’t even get mad at what he does, but I get sick of him trying so hard, so I guess it all works out and I hate his guts and want him to lose really badly.  But this will be his first match back in Japan since the pandemic, so it feels too soon for him to do a job.  So I could see this one going either way, if not for thinking Takahashi challenging for the junior title is the obvious destination.  Gotta go with Hiromu on this one.

New Japan Ranbo - This is a gauntlet battle royale, with two wrestlers starting and each additional wrestler entering at timed intervals.  Participants may be eliminated at any time by pinfall, submission, or exiting the ring over the top rope.  When all but four wrestlers have been eliminated, the match ends and those final four advance to another match on January 5 to determine possession of the KOPW 2021 trophy.

New Japan does this type of match all the time for Wrestle Kingdom (usually with just one winner, not four), and I always thought it was called “New Japan Rumble,” but someone was mistranslating something.  Turns out “ranbo” is literally a Japanese word that can mean “riot.”  So we all learned something today!

I’m not certain how many participants are supposed to be in this.  I think I read 21 somewhere, but even if I did I wouldn’t trust any hard number.  If they have everybody pencilled in a month ago and then the day of the show they get an idea to put, I dunno, Captain New Japan in there, they’ll just do it.  The main thing is that anybody who doesn’t have a regular match on this show or tomorrow’s show will probably be on the short list for this one.  The biggest names that I think we can expect would be Tomohiro Ishii, Toru Yano, Hirooki Goto, YOSHI-HASHI, El Desperado, SHO, Bad Luck Fale, BUSHI, and maybe Minoru Suzuki.

The gimmick where you just have to make it to the last four in the ring should make the finish a bit more unpredictable.  Ordinarily I woudn’t expect, say, Tomoaki Honma to win a match like this.  But it’s not going to make or break tomorrow’s four-way if one or two guys are curtain jerkers or joke guys.  With that in mind I think this match is impossible to predict.  But I guess my dream lineup for the four-way match tomorrow would be...let’s see...Yano, Suzuki, Toa Henare...and let’s go with Yoshi-Hashi to win the KOPW trophy to start 2021 off weird.