#and electronics that fell apart after one use

[heckyeahponyscans]

Rewatching the 90s live action Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie, a nice little touch is that they go out of their way to establish that the evil ninjas are not Japanese (except the Shredder) and that the Japanese-American community has actually been warning the authorities about the evil Foot Clan.

I don't know how many people remember this, but in the 80s/90s in America there was a lot of anxiety / prejudice towards Japan, which was perceived as this mysterious place full of workers who were "too" efficient compared to lazy Americans and thus were going to crush the American car industry or something.

Specifically, I remember an American car dealer (as in he sold American car brands like Fords or Chevys) who ran a local ad urging people to "buy American" instead of supporting "communist Japan."

Shoutout to the journalist back then who covered the story / called him out on his prejudice + pointed out that Japan was not a communist country. No matter the era, there were / are people pushing back against stupidity and bigotry. And you can be one of them. :)

Anyway, TMNT is a great movie.

[jymwahuwu]

Wrote some!! This is the second part of the abo story, you meet your two future Alpha husbands😽😽

part 1

cw: dystopian au, forced breeding policy

You borrow some credit from a friend and save it to a temporary payment card for daily payments. Now your bank account has been frozen by the government - for the hilariously unbelievable reason of not being pregnant beyond the appropriate reproductive age.

You don’t really want to get married, and you’ve criticized and complained about this weird policy on social media in the past. Now you are faced with this situation… There aren’t many options here, and you have to consider marriage and having children. You have no doubt that this government will really force you to be sent to a breeding facility.

News channels have reported that Omega and Beta citizens who repeatedly ignored warnings were sent to breeding facilities and stuck on the wall to wait for thorough breeding and pregnancy. Those citizens who emphasized "reproductive freedom" had their mouths gagged and their hands tied behind their backs. They whimpered and struggled to be stimulated and expanded by dildos, and finally broke and apologized in the water pool.

You-you don’t want to experience…

Before heading out, you circled in front of the mirror and checked your clothes. The two Alphas made an appointment with you to meet and talk in a restaurant. Even though you're dating two people right now, you've only chatted with one of them on the site. He said that the other Alpha believed that marriage and dating had to be discussed in real person. He has a point too. You agreed.

You board a spaceship (no physical currency is required this time, so you breathe a sigh of relief), and check the planned route on the map app to note which station you want to get off the spaceship at. Cheap ships have their downsides. That means the time it takes to travel is doubled, and the number of stations passed is doubled. Tired and shaken along the way, you fell asleep on the spacecraft and finally reached your destination.

After searching for a few minutes, you looked up and were shocked by the decoration of the restaurant. The elegant and luxurious restaurant decoration uses black and purple as the main tone. A foreign song is faintly passed in the air, exuding a quiet and comfortable atmosphere. The Milky Way can be observed in real time outside the window. The sofas and seats for guests are spaced apart and organized. This is very different from the ordinary restaurants you usually go to. Embarrassed, you flipped through the electronic menu in front of the door, wondering if there would be a discount on takeout, and wanted to send a message to them to tell them that they made an appointment at the wrong restaurant. Alas…how are you going to pay for it now…

"Hello, do you have an appointment?" The waiter at the door was filled with a friendly smile. You just feel more pressure. "W-wait, I'll send a message to my friend."

You: I'm here, but wait, is this here? Did I go to the wrong place? 🥹

You: [Restaurant link in the food app]

Aventurine: No, that's right^^ We're already here.

You: okay

As soon as you enter the restaurant, a bouquet of flowers is blocked from view in front of you, the fragrance is overflowing, and the delicate petals are condensed with bright colors and vitality. What's this? You took a step back in fear. A head with blond hair poked out from behind the flowers, with dazzling bright eyes. "Hello, this is a wedding gift." He explained with a smile.

Wedding gift? You were so frightened that your hands trembled, holding a large bouquet of flowers. The flowers are so crowded that they must be leaned on your shoulders.

"Hmm…? Just kidding. This is an engagement gift."

You paused after hearing his explanation. You are not engaged, or even agreed to be engaged to these two Alphas. This must be Aventurine. He was just as flirtatious and cheerful as he sounded on the Internet, sitting down and placing the bouquet in your hand back in its place. Sitting next to him was a man with a frown. "I've had enough of your peacocking. It's so grandiose."

"Ah, of course the more expensive the gift, the better. Everyone's feelings can be reflected in it, right?"

"Hello, I'm Veritas Ratio." He crossed his arms in front of his chest and nodded to you.

[t3a-tan]

Oh, those promps are really good!! How about borrower!james trying to watch a film with human!oliver?

Thanks!

Friendship development! :00

-----

James had been seen a couple of times by his human host now, and was still shocked every time he made it out alive. Oliver had proven to be a very confusing human to live with, and James couldn't tell what to think of him…according to the rules he should be moving— but curiosity has gotten the better of him.

Unlike other humans that James had seen, Oliver rarely seemed to be using an electronic device— instead he was usually reading a book or papers. It was a quiet environment, which made James feel a bit restless now that he had experienced the adrenaline of meeting a human. He had started taking more risks on his borrowing trips, tempting fate but not wanting to actually fully expose himself to the human man yet.

On the rare occasion that Oliver was using the television, James couldn't help but want to join in— he would stay out of sight, but he was dying for some entertainment…and he was interested in seeing what kind of stuff his human watched because it was such an infrequent occurrence. He found a spot sitting on the edge of a shelf that was on the wall behind where Oliver was seated; giving him the perfect view.

As the movie began, James was immediately disappointed upon finding out that it was a documentary, sighing to himself and staring at the screen with disinterest… he instead focused his attention downwards at Oliver, trying to see what his expressions would look like whilst things were happening on screen. Was he also not interested, or was he excited? Was he scared or worried? Maybe angry? Would he talk to himself about what was happening on screen?

He spotted that Oliver was crocheting as he watched the screen, and he observed the subtle smile on his face with interest. He's not like any human I've seen before…he's so… James shook away his thoughts, trying to figure out what Oliver was crocheting by leaning forwards over the edge of the shelf. So far it wasn't clear, but maybe it would be done when the documentary was?

James moved to settle back down only to suddenly lose his balance and find himself toppling over the edge of the shelf with a cry of surprise.

Oliver looked up, startled by the noise but recognizing it for what it was. Before he could try to pinpoint where the noise was coming from, something suddenly fell onto his face. His face scrunched up at the impact and he closed his eyes, opening them after a brief moment to see what had collided with him only for his furrowed gaze to focus in on… a blurry face.

As he tilted his head back downwards he felt tiny hands scrambling for purchase on the tip of his nose, one leg somehow hoisted up onto it whilst the other dangled below. Oliver couldn't help but find the position amusing. The borrower's eyes were wide, clearly just as surprised as him to have found himself in this situation.

“Hello again.” Oliver greeted, tilting his head ever so slightly and seeing how the little man yelped and had to shimmy further onto his nose to keep from falling. He still wasn't over how much of an impact even his smallest movements could have on the borrower… but his expression softened with sympathy at the man's predicament.

“Bloody— help me off of here you silly human!” James demanded, instinctively afraid of falling further even if he knew that the fall would not be deadly and he would have a soft landing. Not to mention the thought of falling onto Oliver's toned stomach made his cheeks redden with embarrassment, even if he was wearing a shirt.

“Are you sure? You told me last time that I'm not to touch you under any circumstance.” Oliver asked, though his hand began to reach up with his fingers splayed apart in preparation to pluck James into them. James bristled on pure instinct and clung on tighter, hiding his face between his forearms, feeling how the human's skin shifted as his expression changed. It really hammered in how small he was.

“Yes I'm blimming sure! Forget what I said before, just help me out, would'ya?” He insisted, feeling that his clammy hands were starting to slip against Oliver's smooth skin. Seconds later he felt a couple of delicate fingers pinch one of his legs and pull him off of the nose he was clinging to, leaving him dangling upside down. “H-hey!”

“Apologies… I couldn't see you very well from there and I didn't want to accidentally knock you off by trying to be more precise. I'm putting you down now.” Oliver assured as he lowered James to his lap, laying the man on his back before moving his hand away in order to let him get his bearings back. He had moved his crochet project onto the cushion beside him so that James would not end up tangled in all of the yarn.

“Are you alright?” He asked more intently, leaning down slightly and readjusting his glasses so they would still allow him to focus on the borrower in his lap. “What were you doing on that shelf? I don't imagine there was anything useful to borrow up there.”

James let out a small huff, getting back to his feet and dusting himself off after the dizzying experience. Humans… no awareness of how big they are… And yet, he had to admit that he was completely unharmed. Not one of his interactions with Oliver had ended with him being hurt by the human or even being restrained. He still found that fact hard to believe.

“I…I was trying to see what you were watching.” He admitted slowly. “But uhh… it doesn't seem to be anything very interesting so I was just on my way back home. Got some dust to arrange, you know how it is.”

Oliver hummed at the shoddy excuse, brows furrowing with confusion.

“Sorry, I do not know how it is. You arrange dust in your free time? Or is that a necessity..?” He asked with a sincere curiosity, but didn't lean in or encroach any further to respect James's personal space. James was surprised that Oliver hadn't caught on to his sarcasm, initially silent before shaking his head and waving a hand dismissively.

“Nevermind. I should be going off now then.” He sighed. As much as James was intrigued by Oliver's odd behaviour, he didn't want to push it and regret it later. The rules were made for a reason after all— no matter how nice Oliver seemed.

“Would you like me to put a different movie on so you can watch something you find more interesting?” Oliver asked, glancing towards the TV that he had long since paused after first hearing James fall. He then looked back down at the borrower, awaiting an answer.

James bristled, looking back up at the human with confusion.

“Pardon?” He asked with disbelief.

“Would you like me to put a different—”

James waved a hand again at the human's literal interpretation of his pardon, only repeating the question. His lips quirked upwards despite himself though, finding it almost endearing…if it weren't for how Oliver was so much larger than him.

“Yeah, I heard you. I just mean…why..?” He reiterated, raising an eyebrow up at the man peering down at him through rectangular framed glasses. The human tilted their head, frowning in confusion.

“Why what?”

“Why would you put something else on for me? I'm a borrower, you're a human. Remember? Kind of bloody important…” He added the last part under his breath, unsure what to think about this interaction because the last thing he expected Oliver to do was try and accommodate him.

Oliver hummed, leaning back slightly but making sure to keep his movements slow and minimal so he wouldn't knock James off balance from where the man was stood upon his thigh. He didn't think changing the movie was that absurd.

“Well… You always leave before we can have a proper conversation or do much of anything. I don't even know your name yet, after all… You're my neighbour, so I'd like to get to know you. I understand if you are more apprehensive however, and there is no obligation for you to stay or speak with me if you don't want to.” Oliver explained, finding it easier to just get all of his thoughts out there instead of guessing what to say and what not to say.

James was speechless for a few more moments, unsure of how to respond. Neighbour? He thinks of me as a neighbour? The explanation made him feel warm inside, some of his admiration for the human he was looking up at seeping through into the forefront of his mind. He had to admit that he also wanted to get to know Oliver…

“My name is James.” He averted his gaze after saying it, feeling a little nervous giving his name away to the human simply because it felt like crossing an extra boundary with the rules. Instead, James looked at the paused screen, contemplating it. Well… I'm sure the rules weren't made for humans like him anyway. “Just pop an action movie on or something like that. Like uhh… those movies with Captain America and stuff in.”

Oliver smiled down at the borrower when he introduced himself, pleased to finally have a name to attach to the face of the man in his walls.

“You like Captain America?” It wasn't what he was expecting necessarily, but he didn't mind putting on a marvel movie. Oliver tended to enjoy any and all genres as long as it was a movie that gave him stuff to think about. If what he was thinking about was a bunch of people in spandex and leather…so be it.

James nodded enthusiastically to the question. He had only seen the movie once but he definitely became his favourite. Maybe he was biased considering he had only seen small segments of other movies and had very little to go off of… but even so.

“I don't think I've watched it myself. Is it alright if we start from the beginning? Perhaps this could be a nightly thing.” Oliver suggested, picking up the remote in order to switch over to a streaming site that would have all of the marvel movies on it. “You're free to say no, of course, James.”

It felt nice to say his name finally. Oliver wanted to make it continuously clear whilst the trust was still rocky that James could back out or leave at any time, just in case he was worried about refusing. It didn't seem like that would be an issue though seeing his face beaming from the corner of his eye.

“I would like that a lot.”

[gingerale2017]

News To Share

Fluff

Fandom: The Lunar Chronicles

Pairing: Cinder x Kai (kaider)

Setting: Sometime after at least Kai and Cinder are married

Words: 2k

Cinder woke up to the soft hum of the timed electrical curtains gliding apart. The eight-in-the-morning sun shot her face mercilessly and, even as her mechanical eyes automatically readjusted, she still had to squeeze them shut against the glare. She let out a soft groan and rubbed her cheek against her pillow.

Except her pillow was warm. And breathing. She froze, not wanting to wake up her husband. Unlike Cinder, the brightest rays of sun failed to wake him up as he breathed evenly and undeterred. She was vaguely aware of his hand hugging her arm as she silently oriented herself to him.

She closed her eyes, wanting to match his state again when she noticed something in the corner of her inner screen. She didn’t receive notifications when she slept so they wouldn’t bother her, but the little inbox where she sent comms kept glowing. It made her open her eyes again in confusion. Who was comming her so much at eight in the morning?

Her curiosity won over her laziness. Cinder willed the comms to open and saw a group-comm chat with message after message. It was made up of all their friends. The must be planning an event or something. The sun seemed to dim against the white chat bubbles, and for once she was glad for her man-made eyes.

Before she could fully absorb the materials of the chat, Kai stirred by moving his hand to her waist.

Cinder smiled and closed the chat, leaning into his lazy hug. Her friends could wait.

“G’morning.” He muttered, voice croaking due to the earliness.

“How did you know I was awake?” She murmured into his chest.

He sighed. “Because you’re too still. Like pretending you’re asleep still. And you hugged me back. I think.” The man was clearly groggy. She chuckled and looked up at his jaw.

“Well, good morning, Kai.” She said, reaching to press a small kiss on his throat. It pricked her lips. “About time for a shave.” She pointed out.

“I know, I know.” He then paused for a beat too long. She worried he fell back asleep. Then he took a sharp intake of breath and spoke. “What’s on the schedule today, darling?”

She hummed, pulling up the electronic list. “Nothing in the morning, which is why we’re sleeping in.” They giggled like little children getting away with something. When you’re royalty, waking up at eight in the morning is considered a luxury. While her chuckles waned, Cinder turned to hug and squeeze his waist. She lovingly dug in her forehead into the softness of his chest. His hand left her waist to pat her head. “We got documents to read over and sign before tomorrow. Oh, and the reps from the Malaysia Provinces scheduled a meeting with us at 15 hours. Though, this is the first time I’m hearing of this.”

Kai groaned and let her have her cuddle moment for second. The he completely shifted their positions by wrapping his arms and legs around like she was a pillow and hid his face in the crook of her neck. “My turn.” He mumbled. She smiled to herself as she noticed how half of one of her arms was underneath his body now, while the her hand remained free. She used that hand to pet his hair, and used her totally free arm to rub circles all over his back. He sighed contently.

Honestly, if she had it her way, this is how she would spend every morning. Instead of waking up in the crack of dawn and leaving each other with quick kisses without a flow of conversation. She’d massage his back for eternity if she could. To Cinder, their love felt so unique and different. It felt like one that only existed every thousands of years or so. Like one from a fairytale, or a romance novel. Obviously, their love story isn’t the only incredible love story out there. There are their friends, each having their own captivating romance. But not like Cinder and Kai’s. No, not like the Commonwealth royalty at all. They understood each other on another level than their friends did, which, again, is likely true for most coupes.

But they were different! She swore they were. She didn’t have anything to prove that they were different, but it sure felt like it. They lived in their own private world that only they can experience. They saw colors, and stories, and artistry, and so much more that they can only see with each other. They’d do things with and for each other they will never do with and for anyone else.

For example, if someone murdered one of her friends, say Thorne, in cold blood, she go after the murderer of course but probably wouldn’t do anything else once justice is served. But if someone were to even give Kai a laceration the size of a tick, she’d go after that person as if they’d murdered him. That’s how far she’d go for him. And, back to understanding the other like no one else, she knew he felt the same way.

Kai moaned, waking her up from her enamored stupor. She blinked and stopped moving. “What’s wrong, darling?” She purred, his pet names rubbing off on her. Probably because she was still high off of her romantic inner spiel, she felt oddly protective of her husband right now. Though, it could also just be of their current cuddle positions.

“Nothing, that just felt so good. Please do it again.” He mumbled, covered by the skin of her neck.

Cinder chuckled to herself and resumed the circling on his head and back. He sighed, absolutely melting into her. She knew for sure he was thinking about how much he loved her. She knew because she was thinking the same thing.

After a small while, she checked her inner ‘port screen’ again and pulled up the messages for the hundredth time. Finally she read the messages and let it sink in. It started forty-five minutes ago and she scrolled to the first message.

Scarlet: Hey guys, sorry if any of you are sleeping right now, but Wolf and I have some news to share :)

Iko: oooooh what is it??

Cress: Carswell and I are awake :))))

Winter: I’m awake as well.

Winter: Jacin can’t find his port but he is also awake.

Winter: He wanted me to tell you.

Wolf: Hey guys, sorry of we’re waking any of you guys up but we have BIG NEWS !!?!

Thorne: ?? i’m a little confused.

Wolf: Sorry, I meant to delete that but I sent it instead. We decided we should send it on Scarlet’s port ./.

Wolf: Sorry, type, I mean just the dot .

Wolf: typo*

Cress: We understand Wolf. What’s the big news?!!

Iko: yessss i’m dying to know

Thorne: same, the suspense is killing me

Scarlet: So I was feeling sick for the last couple of weeks and thought ‘hm that’s strange’ so I was racking my brain as to why I was only feeling sick in the mornings

Thorne: girl are you pregnant?

Iko: THORNE

Jacin: THORNE

Cress: CARSWELL

Wolf: thORNE !??!? can you wait a littlr lonber / please?

Wolf: Sorry, typo. Little* and longer*

Winter: I’m confused, why are we writing Thorne in all capital letters? Is that the news?

Winter: Never mind, Jacin told me.

Scarlet: can i finish my story?

Thorne: we all know how it ends but sure

Thorne: anything for the preggo woman

Iko: THORNE

Jacin: THORNE

Cress: I’ll restrain him Scar, don’t worry.

Scarlet: ty cress

Scarlet: Anyways, I went to the pharmacy and it hit me. What if I’m pregnant?! So I grabbed a couple pregnancy tests and boom here I am. Officially three weeks and a half pregnant :)

Iko: AHHHH CONGRATULATIONS!!

Iko: OMS OMS IM SO HAPPY I CAN’T WAIT TO SEE ALL THE BABY BENOIT-KESLEYS

Iko: IJDNMIKNZFKGIFUBKIBK I’M SO HAPPY RN I CAN’T EVEN

Iko: OH MY STARSSSSSSSSS WHATTTTTT

Scarlet: i know :)))

Cress: CONGRATS SCARLET AND WOLF :DDDD

Cress: This is so exciting!! When is the due date?!?!?

Scarlet: April 27th the doctors said

Thorne: OH YEAH BABY NUMBER ONEEEE

Thorne: WHO’S NEXT ?!?!?

Winter: Wow this is amazing news! Congratulations! I am so happy for you.

Jacin: Congrats you guys, this is great stuff.

Scarlet: thank you soooo much, this means a lot to us

Thorne: yk, my money’s on kai and cinder for the next baby

Thorne: where are they anyway

Iko: let the poor babies sleep

Wolf: Yeah. We are very excited!

Thorne: hey no typos!

Wolf: ? I thoght I didn’t have amy :(

Wolf: Thought* Any*

Thorne: you didn’t

Wolf: Okay. Good.

Iko: LMFAO IM ROLLING

Wolf: Why are you rolling?

Winter: ?

Winter: Nevermind. Jacin just explained.

Scarlet: this is way more chaotic than i thought it was going to be lol

Thorne: our sarcasm receptors are not very high rn

Scarlet: unfortunately

The last message was sent two minutes ago and Cinder could see Winter’s profile thinking up a message. It was a cute mini avatar of her in the corner of the screen looking up at at an empty thought bubble. The avatar was tapping her foot and chin at same time is if it were a real person.

However, Cinder was too stunned to focus the avatar. She gasped and froze her motions. Kai groaned in response.

“Why’d you stop.” He moaned, the words vibrating in her neck. It tickled, but she could only blink.

“Oh my stars, Kai!” She laughed aloud. “Check your port!”

He pulled away and furrowed his brow up at her. “Why?”

“Scarlet’s pregnant!”

Winter: I am not very good with sarcasm sometimes, I am sorry for that :/

He jerked, quickly sitting up. He stared at her with wide eyes. “No way.”

“Check!”

Iko: actually you’re a hidden sarcasm gem

Scarlet: IKR?!?! you literally surprise me every time you whip your sarcasm out

He dove across their way-too-big bed for his port. Cinder could only laugh at the way his feet hung up at an odd angle. She sat up and stretched as she waited. He gasped as he read the message and covered his mouth. Then he laughed in shock. “This is incredible!” He exclaimed once he was sitting close to her again.

“I know! I’m so happy for them.” She giggled.

He tilted his head, still looking at his port. “What does Thorne mean he’s got his money on us.”

Cinder cringed. “Just ignore it. I actually think he and Cress are gonna have baby number two.”

Kai looked at her. “You sure about that?”

Her breath caught. What did he mean by that?

He looked away and typed a response that she could barely process because her mind was still reeling from the look he had just given her. And his words.

Kai: I’m sorry I’m just now seeing this but congratulations on your next stage of life! Cinder and I are so happy for you two!

Cinder: Yeah! We couldn’t be more excited. Keep us updated!

Thorne: damn y’all sleep in or something

Kai and Cinder turned to each other and burst out laughing.

Cinder: shut up

Iko: good morningggggg, i’m otw to breakfast

Thorne: BREAKFAST?!? aces, I was joking, y’all really did sleep in

Cress: We’re in your time zone, btw :3

Thorne: oh we are?

Cress: WHERE ARE YOU

Cress: Sorry that was a private chat meant for Thorne.

Thorne: you’ll never find me :3

Scarlet: aww you guys should meet up!

Scarlet: actually wolf and i were thinking about visiting the east again soon

Winter: Me and Jacin too!

Kai: That’s great news, actually. We can take this as an opportunity to catch up and celebrate your pregnancy Scar!

Cinder: Especially since all of us will be within the same time zone soon enough.

Thorne: okay mr and mrs fancypants

Scarlet: That sounds awesome!!’

Cinder: shut up

Thorne: isn’t there a way to say that a little more nicer

Thorne: yk since you’re royalty or wtv

Thorne: crap, cress found meBIVJAEYL

Jacin: Thanks Cress.

Cress: Anytime :3

Kai frowned. “What do you think she did to Thorne?”

“Hopefully put him down.” She scoffed. He chuckled, then threw his port across the bed.

He blowed a piece of his hair out of his face and smiled at Cinder. “What are you thinking about?”

“Me?” She blinked.

“Who else? Let me ask my other wife.” He teased.

“Stop it.” She glared. Then she looked away, knowing that she’d be blushing right now

He noticed her hidden rosy cheeks. “What is it, darling?” He murmured, using his hand to coax her cheek.

Whether he knew or not, this was a form of manipulation to Cinder as it always made her answer whatever Kai asked or did. Especially when he would rub his thumb back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. She was especially hypnotized whenever he used his eyes. She was like fish and his face was like bait. Once she looked into his eyes, she was hooked.

“I was thinking about what you said earlier.”

“What did I say?”

“When I made that comment about Cress and Thorne having children, you said something.” She mumbled. “I just wanted to know what you meant.” She feared she already knew the answer.

His lips twitched. Repeating her thoughts, he responded. “I think you know.”

“I do.” She whispered.

Then his eyes turned almost into pleading. “It was an offhand phrase, but I’m pretty serious, Cinder.” His other hand rubbed her knuckles. “Actually, I’ve been thinking about this for a while.” He added, with a small chuckle.

She bit her lip. “Really?”

“Yeah, really.” Then he took a moment to look away and sigh. Once he recovered himself, he turned back to her again. “I think it’s time to have children.”

She stared at him for a long moment, leaving him in suspense. She could tell he was dying to know her answer and he’d agree if it were positive of negative. He’s always been supportive.

Then, she slowly smiled at him. “You know, there’s never a right time for these sorts of things.”

“I know.”

“I don’t know if I agree.” She murmured, turning away. Kai squeezed her hand. Stars. Kids! In fact, she knew exactly how she felt about having kids. “But, if we were to have one without planning for it, I wouldn’t mind it.”

He exhaled in relief and cupped her cheek as she smiled. She could hear I love you’s twinkle of his eyes. She coaxed the hand on her face with love and leaned in to kiss him.

Good stars. Kids! It’s true when they say there’s never a ‘perfect moment’ to starts. Hopefully, they’d have his eyes.

A/N: i wrote this at 1 am so it’s a little funky. hope u liked it anyway :)

Tag List: @just2bubbly @cinderswrench @cindersassasin @the-wee-woo-royal @deprivedmusicaljunkie @crescentchat @notjacinclay @wheresmymom-imlost @salt-warrior @rapunzelfromthemoon @briggycat @impossiblesuitcase @kaider-is-my-otp @definitelynotisabel @wassupnye (these are for my kaider ONLY fics so please ask if you want to be tagged or removed <3)

[necros-writing-stuff]

Sleep Paralysis: Collab'oween Day 1

GN!Reader/Male!Unspecified Creature.

Warnings: Rape/Non-con; Maybe feeings of claustrophobia and references to the ocean; Fear of death but no physical harm to reader; Utter helplessness; Cunnilingus/Analingus (you can read as either, I don't specify genitals for reader); Penetrative sex; Creature man has a prehensile pp; 3rd person POV.

Word Count: 2080.

Notes: I'm not doing all of the days, just the six prompts I wrote! Please make sure to check out all of us doing this together: @undead-merman @letstalktea @inkyquince @angrelysimpping Also big thanks to Merman for making the banner and divider and all of their wonderful work on this project.

It gets closer each night. They know as the sun fades, as their eyes shutter closed and the warm fingers of Hypnos keep their lids heavy that it's only a matter of time before the personification of sleep partially releases his hold on them and that reality will blend with their nightmares. 

For months it's happened every night. They awaken without control of their body, not even able to blink, as eyes watch from the darkest corner of their room. It's just a trick of the mind, they know this, but it doesn't make it any less terrifying. 

They'd gone to their doctor. Been referred to get a brain scan by a specialist to ensure it wasn't anything malicious causing the paralysis. All tests came back fine. They were sent home with pills and a regiment to follow. None of it had helped. The only time it ever left was when the dawn broke. Winter was on the horizon. Shorter days. Later dawns.

Then, they'd thought that it wouldn't be able to hide in the dark if there was no darkness. They'd filled their room with nightlights in every corner, left them on as they went to sleep, confident that they'd finally be able to get through the night. They hadn't. The creature cared not for the lights strewn about the room. It was a void of blackness, sucking in the light and refusing to let any stray ray out of its grasp. 

Fine then, it's sunlight it doesn't approve of. UV lamps were bought and installed. Their electricity bill would suffer, so they tried to stay away from electronics during the day to compensate. There was a pile of unread books just begging to be read, afterall. Yet, as night fell and sleep abandoned them once more, the creature remained in its corner. The blue hue of the UV lamps only made it more threatening. Cold, sterile. Dead. 

They couldn’t even sleep through the day. Something pulled at them, keeping them awake even as they lay with their eyes closed in their bed with the room made as dark as they could for the day. Only when the moon was out could they find a fraction of rest.

After months, they found themself getting used to the creature. It was a black blob with (admittedly creepy) eyes - no discernable features, no intent of ill-will it would seem. It just wanted to watch them through the night. 

It just had to move, didn't it? It had to reach a clawed hand it had never seemed to possess before out toward them, its frozen form a threat again for the first time in a long while. The skin (If it had skin) was a black as the void it made; it was hazy due to the smoke that rose from the flesh. The only part of it that continued to move. The smoke. 

Perhaps it was the home. The place they lived was haunted, wanting to torment the poor soul living within. With little money left due to the lamp expenses, they desperately pushed every new lamp into a large box and took it to a car-boot sale. They were all new, but half price anyway. They just needed enough for one night in a local hotel. Just one. To see if it would work. 

Each night that passed as they sold the lamps, the creature got closer. Like it knew. More limbs came out from the haze; the other clawed hand, long seemingly muscled legs, the torso unfurling and appearing to be as large as the rest of it. A beast. A tall beast that could rip someone apart just by strength alone. Still it's face remained shadowed, the smoke dripping down like hair.

Not every lamp was taken, but enough so over the weekend event that they had the money to stay in a hotel. A single bed, no TV, shitty water pressure in the shower. It was only on the first floor but the windows were painted just all the same. At least it smelled clean.

Hope sent them to sleep that night - a tentative hope that was on the verge of snapping as each second ticked by on the old clock on the wall. 

That hope snapped the second their eyes opened with the street lights sneaking through the curtains. It was here. Worst of all, it was closer than it had ever been. Crouched on the edge of the bed, tall frame leaning over so that it looked down at them with those bright white eyes. This close it was easy to see that there was no pupil. No iris. Just white. 

Tears welled that they could not blink away, blurring their vision and making the creature even harder to make it. Panic grasped them tightly, their heart hammering in a chest that refused to twitch. They needed to breathe more, to take in deep, filling breaths. But they could only take in standard breaths as their head began to swim. It felt like being suffocated. 

If they could scream, they would. Especially when it moved right in front of them. It never moved when they could see. Never. It was now. That elongated hand reaching down, a claw tracing the path of the tears as they fell down their face into their hairline. Some of the tears fell into their ears. It made them itchy. 

The creature didn't keep its attention to their face. Its claw wandered down their body, pulling the blanket with it as it exposed them to the cold air of the hotel room. Their pyjamas were lifted, their tummy exposed. Would it start there? Rip of their innards and eat them as they could do nothing to watch? 

Slowly, it pressed its hand flat to their skin. The warmth was a surprise. A creature of such darkness should emanate frost, but its flesh bordered on burning as it pressed down. Would it crush them? Would it contribute to the suffocation that felt it was taking hold? 

It would not. At least, it wouldn't yet. Every touch was gentle as it flipped them over, every adjustment it made of their body made for their comfort as their head was turned to the side so that they could breath with their body laying on their front. It didn't feel right. It shouldn't be so gentle. 

The tears from their left eye now fell over the bridge of their nose and into the eyeline of the other. It merged with the other falling tears as they wet the pillow. 

Beside from the ruffling of clothes and the creaking of the old mattress, the room had been silent. As had the creature. No neighbouring rooms made bangs or bumps in the night. A harsh ripping broke the silence. Their clothes. The creature was removing their clothes. Tearing it to shreds with its knife-like claws and discarding the fabric on the carpeted floor below. 

Goosebumps rippled over their skin as the night's air fell on it. The creature's flesh was the only warmth they could wish for - and they couldn't only wish that it would stop and leave them alone. 

It was a coward. Turning them over so that it didn't have to look in their wide eyes as it tore them apart from behind. Taking their clothes as a butcher would a pelt. Taking advantage of their sleep condition, or perhaps causing it itself so that they couldn't run or fight back. 

Such a strange thing, to feel anger after all of that fear. If creatures like this beast could wander the earth, then perhaps their anger would fuel their spirit enough to find a second life after death and seek vengeance on the wretched thing. 

Despite the feeling that they couldn't breathe, they did not pass out. They wished they would, that they could drift off into nothing before they would feel the beast's claws in their back. This mercy would not be for them. 

And neither would the claws. Not as the creature lowered itself, the bed shifting as its long legs came to sit on the floor and its hidden face lowered to the back of their thighs. 

A tongue, long and thick, teased up their thigh until sharp fangs nipped at the flesh of their ass. The tongue returned quickly, flickering as it found its way to their hole. 

More anger. More rage filling their heart as they desperately plead with their libs to just move. Just the littlest amount of movement - a twitch, anything! Nothing would come. 

It kept poking, prodding, lapping away at their exposed hole while disgusting pleasure whispered up their spine and choked their breaths. ‘Stop,’ they tried to beg. To scream it until their throat would bleed. But what was the use? They’d been begging for months and yet no one was listening. If there was a god or even multiple of them, they’d long since been forsaken to this demonic presence. 

There’s a strength to the beast. It lifts them as if it were nothing, their limp body folding as it hoists their hips up and presses it’s face even deeper into their core; that damned tongue flattening and giving a smooth, languid lick that has their eyes rolling back in their head. It should have stopped at this indignity. Why didn’t it just stop there?

It took its fill of their hole, still following with its tongue as it lowered their body back onto the mattress. As if it couldn’t bear to part with them. And sure enough, its stocky form rose over them again, that red-hot skin pressing to their back as something new wriggled and writhed against their saliva-dripping core. It meant to mount them.

One last push. One last demand for a finger to curl, to prove that they weren’t locked away inside of their own body. Underneath its body. A wall of flesh pressing down, closing in and taking away all of the air in the room as their anger slowly drained into sorrow.

That tentacle-like cock of the creature burrowed its way into them, spreading them open and penetrating deep. Strange guttural noises were snarled by their head, the beast having its pleasure while their tears returned. Every thrust of the hips was more like a roll, like a wave coming in toward the beach and retreating once more. It was graceful, powerful, threatening to take them away with it into the depths below. 

How could they swim against the tide without the ability to move? How could they possibly stop the water from encasing each and every part of them, leaving not a single inch of skin dry? 

Their mind refused to wander away, instead it focused on the smell of burning the creature emanated. It grasped onto every touch and grab the creature made at their skin. It couldn’t kick or scream anymore. Just like the body it inhabited. God, they were so tired.

Sweat gathered on their skin, the heat from their creature making it feel like a sauna in the cheap room. Sharp nips were given to their neck and shoulders, fanged teeth having a taste or maybe even marking what belonged to it. Its tongue came back to clean their cheeks of tears. 

Why did it have to feel so sweet? The slow build to the orgasms that hit in waves matching its hips pulling in and out. Its cock moved by itself while it would thrust, slowly undulating, causing their throat to seize from how intensely their nerves lit on fire for it. 

Almost. Almost they were freed from being there. It was exhausting being used so thoroughly, their eyelids were heavy and promised the sweet release of unconsciousness. It never came.

Who's to say how long it stayed on top of them that night. They couldn’t see the clock, couldn’t say when the beast woke them from peace. It stayed until the sun’s rays peaked through the cheap old curtains. But it left with a promise, a lingering hand on the back of their neck as it rose up, thumb rubbing over the freshest bite. It would be back. 

They still felt numb when control returned to their limbs. Felt numb for the rest of the day until night fell once more and that fear built. All they could focus on was the fact that the semen dripping from their hole never cooled in their frigid winter air seeping into the room.

[atalossofwords]

YOU TASTE THE SILVER - IvanTill WIP (PART 1)

Hi y'all. The brainrot took me with no warning, and I've written 5k for these two just the last two days. I've no idea how much I'll write, but I'm going to squeeze the serotonin for as long as I can lmao

Anyhow, this is a streamer/actor AU that somehow evolved into a sugar daddy AU. Till is a streamer, and Ivan is a famous actor who found him when he was a small streamer and fell in love; he's been sending donations for a good while now, but they've never communicated outside of it.

Until Till opens his PO box and Ivan's need to spoil Till is too much, at least. Then all bets are off, and Till finally starts thinking more about the stranger who keeps sending him gifts. I have a basic outline for it all, but I'm going with vibes first, since I mostly just want to write them and torture Ivan.

I'm going to be posts little snippets of what I've writer so far over the next few days, so please don't be afraid to come to my inbox to ask about them!

This was inspired by this fic! Check it out!

Till wasn't the most famous streamer there was. Not anything near that, actually, though he thinks he does well enough.

He has an established fanbase, almost 500k of them, he's sold some merchandise and collabed with some pretty nice people. He likes streaming, varying between his songwriting and recording processes and any new video game that catches his fancy.

When he started, he didn't think he'd do this for a living. He probably wouldn't be able to afford it, being a struggling musician as he was, for once.

He couldn't blame his comfortable living situation solely on one person, no, since that would be incredibly inconsiderate of the rest of his fans, but this one Navi person definitely funded Till's move from his old apartment mostly by themselves.

Case in point.

NAVI (TILL'S ATM) DONATED $100: Hyung, how's the new house?

Till reads the donation out loud, ignoring his chat going a little crazy over Navi's donation. By now, Till is used to Navi only ever sending messages through donations. He'd be so flustered, in the beginning, and worried enough he almost disabled them. Luckily Hyuna talked him out of it.

"It's going well. As everyone can see, my studio isn't done yet," he says, gesturing behind himself into the empty expanse of freshly painted wall. At least he'd painted it black already. "but the rest is going okay. I'm really sorry for the week I had to take off, everyone."

He quickly scams the chat, his heart feeling warm as all the people watching rush to reassure him that it's not a problem, he should take care of himself, and how glad they are he managed to move from his shitty rented apartment.

"Actually, I have some news for you all." He scratches his neck, a nervous habit, and looks to the side. Hyuna convinced him to do this, so he knows it's something streamers do, but he can't help being anxious about it. "Since I moved, and this place needs some decorations, I was thinking of opening a PO box and doing an... what's it called? Unboxing?"

The chat is going crazy, he can barely keep up, oh god. He feels his cheeks heat.

"An unboxing live and then decorate my stream setup with some stuff I get. Would you guys like that?"

His chat is a mess of "yeses" and incoherent screams, and Till can't help but smile a little. He's got to say, he's looking forward to this.

The following weeks are a bit of a mess. He streams less than normal, still setting up his new apartment; he goes with Hyuna to buy electronics she swears will make his streaming better.

Dewey, his brother, goes with him to buy a new shelving unit and help him set up all his new furniture. Isaac is strangely fixated on saying Till needs rugs and other things, otherwise his apartment is "just a place, not a home, bro", apparently.

He checks in with his PO box frequently, each day more excited by all the packages he got. After two weeks he announces on twitter he'll be closing the PO box in a week since he wants to be able to open all the gifts on stream and he's already got a good amount of them.

The day after his announcement, he goes to pick up any new packages to store in his living room since he doesn't want to burden the office workers and finds a package that makes his stomach twist in itself.

It's a large box, clearly packed by hand instead of the usual post-service stamps. And it has a large sticker reading "FROM: NAVI" on it.

Till doubts anyone would use the name to get his attention, since he does treat all his viewers equally, so this really is from Navi. He wonders what is in it, since Navi clearly has money to spare and intends to spend it on Till.

"It's probably a maid dress." Hyua says, helping him lug it all to his apartment.

"It's not!" He splutters, mortified. Hyuna raises an incredulous eyebrow. "It's probably snacks, or something like that. Navi's said they travel a lot." That, somehow, just makes the eyebrow twitch higher.

"You remember what your viewers say?" She asks, hip-checking his door open. He follows, frowning a little. He always remembers what his viewers say.

Navi, obviously, since they only talk in donations, but also a few other regulars. Kirby has an older sister they're sharing the computer with; Siren started learning the guitar because of Till, and is doing well for himself; Jaewoon – with the username Till's Merch Overlord – draws and is currently suffering through art university, BonBon who has a one-year-old and listens to Till while doing his household chores.

"Yeah? I mean, there's only so many people who regularly chat. And out of those, a good part are my mods." He says, shrugging. He knows Hyuna pays someone to mod for her, but Till didn't think he'd need a mod, since he never expected to get so many views. He kept going without mods for so long that the most active members of the community ended up auto-modding the rest, at which point Till just reached out and asked if they wanted to mod, and now he pays them for it because he felt bad otherwise.

(Of course, Navi isn't a mod. They'd fit Till's criteria, but they never chatted normally, so it was kind of hard to ask.)

"Aaah, you're just too wholesome, heartbreaker." Hyuna says, sighing, the old nickname that still makes Till confused coming out with a teasing lilt. She waves him off before he can say anything, though, plopping the box on the couch and grinning at Dewey. "Hey, this one you'll definitely want to check!"

Till rolls his eyes as his brother 'oohs' and 'aahs' over the package, Isaac peering over with a pocket knife ready to pry it open. When Till mentioned opening a PO box, he insisted on checking the gifts beforehand, just to make sure they were all stream-appropriate and, most importantly, not dangerous for Till.

He was grateful his brother cared, but he was less amused by the teasing and hint-dropping they'd been doing over the content of the packages. He leaves them to it, moving to the kitchen to get some much-needed coffee.

Looks like Isaac bought bungeo-ppang, so Till fills a mug and picks one, nibbling at it and looking into his fridge. He should go buy more food, but there's a seven-eleven right across his street, so he almost never bothers stocking up. He does need to get more tea, though, since he dislikes drinking water, and for reasons unknown, his chat enjoys it when he drinks on-stream.

He finishes updating his list and walks back to the living room, where Dewey has already closed the package back up, but is holding a small parcel in his hand, frowning. Hyuna looks over as he approaches, a complicated expression on her face.

"The rest of the package is fine to open on-stream, but I think this one might be best off-stream." She says, and the lack of any teasing or barb makes him worried. She must've read that in his expression, because she grins. "Do you happen to know why this Navi person likes you so much? I wouldn't mind getting some of these myself."

Till can't help but scowl, snatching the parcel from Dewey's hands. He doesn't know Navi, not really, but they're still one of his first viewers, and they do kind of give Till a lot of money.

"Keep your hands away from my viewers, hag." He has to move fast to escape her grab, which soon develops into a little keep-away with the parcel, soon ending up with Dewey on the ground howling with laughter as Isaac tries to haul Hyuna off him, curled on himself on the ground to keep the parcel to himself.

"Ugh, you brat! Just open it!!" She exclaims, sitting down on Dewey's lap, making the older man yelp. Till huffs, but sits up to analyse the gift.

It seems to be an envelope, like many of the letters he got, but there was something inside of it, making it weirdly bulky. Till folds it open, tipping the envelope so whatever it is can fall on his open hand, and stares.

There is a pair of... earrings, on his hand.

Diamond earrings, to be precise.

That the fuck.

Till stares at it, then peers inside the envelope. Nothing weird falls out, like a damned credit card or pure gold, but a little recipe with the return address of a high-class jewellery store makes itself known. The rest of the envelope contains a certification for the damned diamonds.

Till curls up back again, head in his hands, groaning. His face is so hot you could cook an egg in it.

Navi got him diamond piercings because Till complained once, months ago, that he wanted to switch out his piercings but didn't have the money for it.

"C'mon Till! You didn't tell me you had a sugar daddy!" Hyuna jeers, and from the hiss and yelp, Dewey just dropped her. The sound of them bickering – Hyuna insisting this Navi person has to be after Till's virtue, and Dewey being insulted by the thought of someone going after his little brother like that, plus Isaac googling the store to throw fuel on the fire – is enough to distract Till form his own freakout.

He sits back up, his face still red, to study the piercings better. There are six items in total. One is a simple diamond stud, a tiny and delicate stone, probably for his second hole. A pair of bigger stones, with four elongated asymmetrical spikes, making it look like a shining star, probably for his first hole. One's a series of round stones inlaid together in a belt, forming a hoop, for his helix piercing. The final ones are two silver loops, delicate and silver, for his double auricle piercing.

He thinks if he puts any of those on, he's going to spontaneously combust.

(Later that night, after Hyuna and Isaac went home and Dewey crashed on his couch, Till locks his bedroom door and tries them on. The pair of star-shaped earrings go on both ears, the tiny stud on his left, alongside the helix, which he takes a while to get on since it is so finicky, he pierced it himself with a safety pin in high school. The hoops go on his right, looking a little lonely with just the earring, remembering Till that he really wishes he had money to get a constellation on that ear.

He's wearing a simple white shirt, ready for bed, that slips off his shoulder to show off the simple moon covered by clouds on his clavicle, clashing with the TILL tattoo he has over his neck. He turns this way and that, watching the diamonds shine, and feels almost bad for using them.

Why did Navi send this to him? What did Till do, to deserve something as delicate as this? He's not the kindest of people, he's kind of an asshole actually, all shouting and side eyes. He's not the kind of guy that can properly appreciate such nice jewellery, not the kind of person that should be appreciated like this.

Still. The diamond shines against his skin, the silver compliments his white hair. He takes most of them off, only keeping the simple snake bites. He doesn't want to somehow dirty up the diamonds.)

part two

[mariegolddoesthings]

I can't show y'all art but I'd like to introduce y'all to my MHA ocs.

Koriya Makinari: A hotheaded girl that applied to UA alongside her cousin, Denki Kaminari.

Hero Name: Shockstorm

Quirk: Electrification - She can release electron energy from her fingers! She can get lightheaded if she overuses it.

"Don't try to get near me and my cousin. When protons and electrons collide, you're in for a voltapalooza!"

So I have a theory that Kaminari's family has different electrical energies based off who they're born from. Kaminari definitely seems like a protons guy, while his cousin has electrons! I'll explain the energy properties sometime later maybe.

Koriya Makinari was born with an uncontrollable negative energy property apart of her quirk, born from her neutron filled mother and her negativity filled father, presumed quirkless, or so she thought...her quirk, unlike Kaminari's, can seriously go out of control if not trained to restrain enough. If she uses too much power, she'll get lightheaded.

Her personality is quite like Bakugo's, except she has less of a temper and more competitive spirit. She has shorter than shoulder length black hair sticking out to her left and right sides, with a yellow lightning symbol on her right. Her eyes and skin are just like her cousin's Her first hero suit is a yellow jacket with multiple black lightning symbols adorned on it, with a radio communicator on her ear. Her pants are also yellow, with an open hole on her knee...for flair. She also wears white sneakers.

_

Jiya Jeoru: The only known nonbinary pro hero in Japan.

Hero Name: Twilight Tabby

Quirk: Perfect balance - No matter how far they lean or tilt, they'll always stay on their feet!

"I don't care what people say about me. I am a hero, and I fight for everyone. Women, men, even the ones that don't identify as either."

Jeoru has a short brown ponytail with dark square eyes and a stoic expression, their skin dull and almost completely between light and dark. Their hero suit is based off a gray Scottish Fold Cat, with the ears, a tight suit, and of course, a tail.

Pride...wasn't always something accepted in Japan. When they first arrived at UA, despite their excellent performance in the sports festival, many agencies rejected them because of who they wanted to be. But Jeoru pushed forward, no matter how much they got turned down. They became a hero. Now Jeoru's an icon across Yokohama, a role model to many worldwide.

With their quirk, they can perform impossible combat moves against villains. This helps them fight against multiple opponents with ease.

Their personality is quite calm and devoted to being a hero. And they don't let anyone tell them who they have to be. That's the balance they want to settle.

_

Mika Kaitesse: A rude, villainous girl who will always get a laugh out of someone when they use their quirk.

Villain Name: Withered clover

Quirk: Jinx Manipulation - Whoever she makes eye contact with will have bad luck fall upon them for an hour!

"Slipping on a banana peel? HA! That's too bad...and comedic!"

Kaitesse has wild, curly pigtails that are so yellow, you couldn't even call them blonde. She has narrow eyes adorned with a baby blue. Her hero suit contains a cropped tanktop with a dull green, a three leaf clover symbol revealing part of her ivory chest. She also wears shorts of the same color with black boots. She has a white glove on her right hand and a pink bracelet on her left wrist.

Life wasn't always good for Kaitesse. Her family abandoned her when she was twelve, after bad luck fell upon them too many times. Seems they couldn't handle it anymore. A shame...

Left in the rain, Kaitesse became a rebellious villain, using her quirk to have citizens' luck go down to zero, as she laughed in the shadows.

After her abandoning, Kaitesse turned out to be extremely rude and laughs at people when she gets the chance. You can't blame her, honestly.

_

I do have one more oc, but I'm still trying to develop her. For now, have these three!

[armpirate]

The Only One || JJK || Ch. 36

Pairings: mafia!jk x fem!reader

Genre: smut, angst, mafia, contract relationship

Warnings: Prostitution, torture, blood, use of drugs and weapons

Summary: You've always wished for a better life. Every single day at work, you were hoping something would change. Although you didn't think that change would come in the form of one mysterious man and a contract.

His controlling and selfish behaviour only wanted to keep you away from any other man that wasn't him, and you only had to wait for him.

Too bad you really thought you'd be smarter than Jeon Jungkook.

Previous || Next

MASTERLIST

Aprox. time of reading: 16 minutes

Jungkook stopped, gaze falling to her after he was done explaining what the plan was. Her features were blank as she tried to understand everything she missed during such a little span of time.

—Are you sure about trusting Sanhyuk though? —she looked at him, elbows resting on her knees— He's a rat that would sell his mother if he got the chance.

—He's a rat, but he's useful to get information —he shrugged—. And I doubt my father would expect an alliance with him, so it'd work in our favor.

—Or against us —she muttered, earning a warning look from him—. But you're the expert, so I'll trust you —she sighed.

That comment made him scoff, hand instantly falling to her thigh, pressing his digits on her flesh over her jeans to earn a smile from her. He felt his heart squeezing on his chest, similar to the feeling he felt when he woke up next to her; seeing Y/n sleeping peacefully by his side, eyebrows only furrowing momentarily, while her hand gripped on his bicep as if she was scared he'd disappear was endearing for him. The type of image he'd love to keep reviving every day of his life. It was the same with that playful smile she dedicated to him. Jungkook wanted to witness it every second she was with him.

—What's your plan?

There was no irony in his tone, there wasn't any type of trap or defensive attack, and that was what surprised her the most.

—I guess running away and hiding isn't on the table? —she thought out loud— Because your father will find us either way —she nodded, answering herself her own question—. I told you last night —her hand covered his—: I trust you. And if that means working with Sanhyuk, then so be it —after shrugging, she intertwined their fingers.

—Who are you and where's my Y/n that would find a problem with everything I do?

Her head fell back with fake annoyance, rolling her eyes before she chuckled at his comment.

—If you want her back, I can bring her back at any point and make you regret your own words —she assured him—. But I will once all of this is done. For now, hope you're okay with a tamed version of myself.

—I want all the versions of you.

His eyes shined when she turned to look at him. She still couldn't believe the same man that was giving her butterflies at that moment was the same person that'd be begging people for their lives. She couldn't recognize his aura, but she loved how cozy and close he looked. On the outside, he was still the head of a big mafia family, dressed in his expensive slacks and black shirt, with a silver necklace standing out over everything; but on the inside he was the same man that spent hours by the phone waiting for her call, the same man that kept looking after her even if they were miles apart and that kneeled in front of her for her forgiveness.

—Eyes on the road, boss —she mocked him—. I want to get safe wherever you're taking me.

Earlier in the morning, Jungkook told her to get dressed again because he wanted to take her somewhere. He didn't mention where, or why. She just did what she was told, because she didn't care, she just wanted to be with him. He had been driving for quite long already, he wouldn't be able to go on for much more before they ended up in the middle of the sea on a long trip to Valencia.

The electronic voice of the navigator guided them through a dirt road that Y/n knew would end up filled with mud as soon as it started raining a little.

—Wouldn't it be better to leave the car somewhere else and go there by foot?

She hadn't been exactly to that place. She didn't even recognize it, but she thought it was similar to the area she visited with her parents once a year when it snowed, or when they went camping once a year when she was younger. Her father used to warn her about those roads and how dangerous they can be for a car after he storytold how he got stuck on his old days.

—It'll be safer if we get to the place in the car —he answered—. I don't know who's out there, or if someone followed us here.

—Jungkook, seriously... —she clicked her tongue— You can't be so hardheaded.

—You just made that word up.

—No, I didn't —she rolled her eyes—. You can look it up in the dictionary. It exists, and it has your face blasted on the definition.

They were both so immersed in the discussion, and trying to guess whether that word was right or not, that she didn't notice he kept on driving through the road until they got to a big old villa. With the alert that they reached the desired spot, Jungkook parked the car and smiled proudly at her.

—And nothing happened to the car.

—You should be thankful you're pretty and I don't want to ruin that face, because I'd punch you right now.

—Leave that aggressiveness to the shooting range.

—The shooting what?

Jungkook grinned at her confusion, hopping off the car to surround the front part and open the door for her. Despite not knowing what was happening, or why they were there, the grip of her slim fingers around his hand was tight and firm.

Several cars were lined up at the entrance. And where there were cars, there were several men dressed in suits and dark clothes. They didn't have any security getting there, but every step they took closer to the villa, or inside, was carefully scrutinized by them.

—Are they on your side or did you make us go into the lion's den?

—They're all on our side —he assured her—. All of them won't hesitate to take a bullet for you, so you're safe.

And she was able to see that same loyalty and respect when every male they passed by lowered their gaze, bowing to Jungkook and setting the way free for them.

—Is this yours?

—Jimin's —he sighed—. That crackhead loves something big that could get attention, and this is what he bought as soon as we got the deal for this territory —his voice sounded tired, but there was some fun high-pitched in his words.

—Some buy houses, and others buy people. To each their own —she playfully teased.

—Don't tell me my purchase wasn't the best, because you'll be lying —his lips caressed her forehead with his teasing.

They ventured inside the place, Y/n only being able to overlook some of the rustic furniture and some hyperrealistic drawings while she tried to follow Jungkook's steps towards the stairs that led to a lower floor. There was a big contrast among the two places. The first one was proper for any normal landowner in the area, but downstairs it was as if they had taken the shooting zone of one of those police movies there. On the right, at one extreme in the room, there were several types of guns hung on the wall, while in front of her there were different cartels with a body-shaped figure drawn in them.

—Yesterday I saw you're able to defend yourself with anything at your reach —he scoffed—, but I need you to learn how to use a gun. For your own safety, and my sanity.

Her eyes shifted form the shelf filled with guns to his worrying gaze. She didn't like the way that sounded like he wasn't going to be next to her when anything swayed in the wrong direction.

—Doll, don't give me those eyes —Jungkook smiled—. I just think it'll be good for you.

—What eyes? —she moved her gaze away— You should've done this way earlier —she walked to the shelf.

—Babe —he stopped her trembling hand when she tried to reach one of the small guns—, it doesn't mean I'll leave you alone.

—I know —she nodded—. Because if you do, I'll stick that one —she pointed to one of the rifles— up your ass.

Jungkook guided her through the whole process, making sure she knew how to charge the gun and how to unlock the safety-catch. He let her practice on her own, encouraging her to go as fast as possible every time she tried, before they moved to the shooting range.

His body almost covered hers as he stood behind her, moving his arms over hers to teach her how to hold the gun and how to point at her target. Her body squirmed to the powerful sound that came out of the weapon she was holding in her hand and the thick vibration running through her fingers after she pulled the trigger.

—Shall we make a bet? —she asked, smirking while they stayed in that position.

—What do you want? Every headshot is 500 euros worth in clothes?

—You'll buy me that anyway —she slightly turned her head to him—. With every headshot, you'll owe me a normal date.

It wasn't until she brought it up that he was aware that they never had a regular date per se, neither of them were able to feel the tension increasing with every small step into each other's direction, or the uncertainty that the chemistry will keep going strong the next time they saw each other. They weren't even able to talk about their lives with fun anecdotes.

—Deal —he nodded—. You'll choose the plans.

He was competitive, which meant he was hard to beat. But Y/n was determined and slick, which was more dangerous than any of his virtues. If she wanted something, she did it until she made it. That was why he wasn't surprised when he saw her completely focused, looking at her from behind, while she raised the gun and started shooting again.

Once she was done, she dedicated him a proud smile and invited him to go on and count the holes on the drawing's head.

—Six. You get to choose six dates —he informed her—. I'll give you way more than that though.

His words triggered something in her, because she saw nothing else but his lips. Snatching the gun from her hand, and leaving it on the stand next to where they were, Jungkook felt free to lift her in his arms, feeling her thighs surrounding his body almost instantly.

✸ ✸ ✸

She had a disgusted look on her face, looking through the door, the rain pouring in front of them, and the branches of the trees moving with the air. He didn't need to read her mind to know what she was thinking, or what she was dying to say at any moment. She warned him, and he didn't listen.

Through the sound of the thunder, and the rain hitting the car and the ground, he heard her babbling some words in Spanish while she made her way to the car while she hugged herself.

—What if we stay until it calms down? —she asked, when he joined her inside— The road will probably be muddy.

—It'll be okay —he assured her—. If I keep a steady peace, and I don't stop, the wheels shouldn't get stuck.

She still wasn't okay with his idea, but there wasn't much she could do other than just let him be. Once an idea got inside his head, there was no way of getting it out. And she was the living example of it.

As they started their way back to the road they came from, she thought that maybe she was being too hard on him. Jungkook clearly knew what to do, he had full control of the car with barely any effort. She was about to eat her own words, backtrack on everything she didn't even say out loud until she was reminded she was the one who was right.

First, it was the sound of something blowing, and later the car slightly bounced, making them look at each other.

—Tell me that wasn't a puncture.

Jungkook's nervous smile transmitted everything that needed to be said, without saying a single word.

—Well, at least we didn't get stuck.

—Yeah. At least we didn't get stuck —she nodded—. Where's the gun now? —she casually asked, looking at the back.

—I'll check outside. Stay here.

It wasn't like she could go anywhere. It was dark, it was raining, and the road was probably impossible to set foot on. So she just crossed her arms, looking at the drops rolling down the windshield while Jungkook tried to check the wheel, lighting it with his phone flashlight.

They were in the middle of nowhere. No one knew they were there, and probably no one would come looking for them there. It wasn't like they needed to be in a hurry to leave, at least not for that night. When she looked over the rearview mirror and saw Jungkook under the rain, she also felt sorry for him.

She rolled the window down, feeling some of the cold drops on her fingers and the reverse of her hand, before she felt them on her head when she leaned out the window to call Jungkook.

—Let it be. Let's wait for tomorrow —she tried to make him get back inside the car.

—I can change the wheel —he assured her—. It won't take me long.

—Jungkook, I saw something. Get back inside —she lied.

His head immediately raised from the lower part of the car, looking up at her, and then looking behind him to check what she was saying. And while he moved his eyes away, she rolled the window back up. Jungkook slowly stood up, adopting a defensive pose while his hand reached the gun hid in the back of his pants. He was getting ready to attack while he made his way back to his seat.

—Move to the backseat and don't come out.

—But...

—Move to the backseat and don't come out —he repeated.

She sighed, and did as she was told. She could've told him there was no one outside -or, at least, she didn't see anyone nor anything outside. She just tried to get him back in the car, because she knew he wouldn't have moved back inside otherwise.

Without turning to her, and forcing himself to be on high alert, he asked her where she saw what triggered her.

—That's what I was trying to tell you, there's nothing outside —she shrugged.

The hand that held the gun dropped to his thigh, at the same time he turned to her to give her a pissed look.

—I tried to tell you, you just didn't want to listen —she defended herself.

—Didn't you say you were on a more tamed version?

—I am —she raised her eyebrow—. I did it for you. You'll catch a cold if you stay out there for so long. Let's spend the night here.

It wasn't like he wanted to be mad at her, but he'd have hoped to, at least, be annoyed at the situation. They were going through a delicate time, the slightest warning of danger should have him with his guard up as soon as it was presented, and her playing around with it wasn't doing it any good. But the fact that she was worrying about him, and that she knew him so well to be forced to use that tactic made him smile while his eyes dropped down.

—Take off the jacket, turn on the heat and join me here —she invited him.

Jungkook probably would've stayed mad in his place if she didn't rule all of him in that moment, getting him to do exactly what she asked. And while he moved in between the two seats, she took off her hooded jacket, using it as a towel on his hair and upper body to dry him.

—I'm using my first date —she whispered, while she was moving the jacket over his locks.

—What?

—The dates I earned before —she explained—. I'll be using the first one now.

—How's this a date?

—You, me —throwing the jacket over the front seats, she allowed herself to press her palm over his humid slacks—, calm environment, and a good talk. We'll be able to work with that.

There wasn't much talk, because he trapped her lips and made sure to place her legs in a way they'd be hanging on his so they'd be closer.

It didn't matter what was going on back in the real world, or what they'd have to confront the next day. That small bubble they built for each other was enough to make them forget about it all. Jungkook only wanted to care for her, and Y/n only wanted to care for him.

She rested her head over his shoulder, hearing his heartbeat pumping in his chest, a sound that the silence was gifting her before she interrupted it with a small chuckle.

—This reminds me of the time my dad's car got stuck in a muddy road, and we were stuck there for like five hours. He said that it felt like camping somehow, and then he became obsessed with camping until he made it a yearly tradition —she remembered, eyes getting lost in a particular spot in the car for no reason.

—Huh, I see where you got your pigheadedness from —he joked, while his fingers traced random lines on her back—. It's the first time I've heard you talk about your parents this way.

A sigh dropped her lips, getting more comfortable against his body.

—I don't really have many reasons to talk about them in general —his fingers moved up her back, hiding in the locks of her hair while he squeezed her nape—. They didn't act like parents when they should have. When I got pregnant, I didn't really want anything from them, just support. Honestly, I probably would've been okay even after they kicked me out if they had just shown the slightest interest in me. But they didn't even dare to say goodbye properly —her fingers moved over his arm, tracing random lines that weren't even meant to caress him—. The next day I told them, I found the door closed and my things on the street. And not a single time they tried to find me after I left, same goes to my ex boyfriend.

—That was when you met Jorge?

—I met him a bit after —she answered after shaking her head—. When I lost the baby, I didn't go to the doctor nor get treated, so it affected my health. He could've let me die in the middle of the street, yet he helped me and looked after me even after I recovered.

Something humid fell on his neck and rolled down his collarbone when she made a long pause, and it only made him hold her tighter, squeezing her knee to let her know she wasn't alone anymore. There was something he wasn't able to explain, a feeling that was building up inside of him. He always was keen on understanding her nature, of knowing what made her brain work the way it did, but he never thought that knowing it would create such rage.

He for sure knew that he wouldn't let it go. All those people needed to pay for putting her in such a position and hurting her that way.

His dark ideas got interrupted by her hand covering the reverse of his hand, hiding the knuckles that started going blank by the way he was gripping on his own slacks.

—It's in the past though. I bet karma will put them in their place one day.

And he'll make sure of that.

—Why don't you tell me about yourself? Hmm? You've never talked about your family either.

—Do you really think I need to? —he chuckled— You've already seen my father, there isn't much else to talk about. He's willing to kill me now, so I don't think it'll be a surprise for you to know he beat me up when I was younger.

Her head instantly raised at his words, concerned at the way he so casually dropped them.

—He said it was a way to make me tougher. I had to come up by myself with the idea that if I cried, he'd only beat me harder. And with that same excuse, he'd force me to go with him and see him torture and beat someone that went against his interests.

Most of his childhood consisted in testing his own pain, always overcoming it so the next beating wouldn't be as painful, used to the horrors his father did to others so he'd learn how respect was earned and how people that played with him should be punished. Since he was younger, he was lectured about his position in the family. And he took the role with no complaints, he did everything he was expected to do.

—What about your mother? How could she allow it?

—She died when I was thirteen —he whispered—. I don't even know if she was ever aware of what happened. I remember my father used to use her death as a way to teach me how people and emotions could make me vulnerable, and how I should never be like him in that sense.

—How could he let you go through all those things? You were only a kid...

Y/n hugged him tight. As if that would erase all the horrid memories and wash all the pain away. She expected a difficult childhood -or, maybe, teenage years more-, but never to that extent. His father trained him as if he were a dog, and was ready to get rid of him as soon as he realized he didn't meet the expectation he set.

It wasn't like she expected much better from someone who faked his death only to test his son. That should've been enough to tell the type of life Jungkook had when his father was still around.

—I only have you —he admitted.

—We have each other —she nodded, while her fingers played with his hair—, which is fucked up for Mr. Jeon, because I won't let him hurt you again.

—Shouldn't I be the one saying that?

—You've said it way too many times, it was my turn.

Jungkook laughed slightly, before her lips were linked to his in a long kiss that'd leave them breathless. A kiss so intimate and passionate that both of them were only craving for more the second they broke the kiss, moving their mouths together again until they fell completely asleep.

Taglist: @kaiparkerwifes @sheylamc @amy2006jones @allamericanuniverse @00frenchfries00 @massivelyfullenthusiast

[spacefinch]

Pokemon Incorrect Quotes: Unova Edition

Hugh: *handing out smiley balloons* I have no soul. Have a nice day!

Colress: I don't have one either.

Drayden: Let me see what you have!

Iris: A knife!

Drayden: NO!

Cilan: Fun fact! Blueberries are the only fruit named after a color.

Iris: Star fruit?

Cilan: ♥️ So close! That is a shape ♥️

Colresss: Welcome to physics!

*science project explodes*

*screaming*

Hilda: 🎶 ANNIE ARE YOU OKAY, ANNIE ARE YOU OKAY, ANNIE 🎶

Hilbert: *banging pots and pans*

Hilda: 🎶 ANNIE ARE YOU OKAY, WILL YOU TELL US THAT YOU’RE OKAY 🎶

Teacher: Uh, Cheren, can you read number 23 for the class, please?

Cheren: No, I cannot. What up, I’m Cheren, I’m 19, and I never fricking learned how to read.

Chili: Hi, welcome to Chili's.

Elesa: Hey, I’m lesbian.

Emmet: I thought you were Unovan.

Clay: I wanna be a cowboy, baby!

Alder: Hell yeah!

Clay:  I wanna be a cowboy, baby!

Hilbert: TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN

Cheren: Why are you guys reblogging this in December?

Hilda: TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN

Rosa: TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN

Cheren: It is February, you ANIMALS

Nate: TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN

Emmet: "Average person eats 8 spiders a year" factoid, actually statistical error. Average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave and eats over 10,000 every day, is an outlier and should not have been counted.

Chili: Oh sorry, I fell asleep while I was waiting on you to make me a sandwich.

Cress: Go back to sleep AND STARVE.

Ingo: Perhaps it is the context in which words are spoken that gives them the power of meaning. *yelling* I LOVE YOU, JOLTIK!

Emmet, banging on pots and pans: I DON'T GET NO SLEEP 'CAUSE OF YOU! Y'ALL NOT GONNA GET NO SLEEP 'CAUSE OF ME!

Hilda: Would you like something to drink? *opens fridge* We have water, milk, juice, Joltiks, Dr. Pepper…

Cheren: Joltiks?

Hilda: Joltiks it is, then.

Cheren: Wait, that’s not what I meant—

But she was already pouring him a brimming glass of Joltiks.

Ingo and Emmet: *in the middle of an intense Pokemon battle*

Hilbert: Can I get a waffle? Can I PLEASE get a waffle?

After said battle:

Hilbert, pointing at the losing Pokemon: He need some milk

Ingo: Road work ahead? Uh, yeah, I sure hope it does!

Rosa (pointing at a flock of Swanna): Look at all those chickens!

Ingo: *filming in selfie mode*

Emmet: (in background) Bop it! Twist it! Pull it!

Colress (grinning): I'M GOING TO JAIL!

Cheren: Tumblr is just talking to yourself but with an audience.

Cilan: That’s called a soliloquy.

Cheren: Found the theater kid. Get em boys.

Iris: Hey OP, how do we know you’re not a theater kid?

Cheren: I’M AN ENGLISH LIT MAJOR, YOUR HONOR

Cilan: Eating chips with chopsticks is unironically galaxy brain. Your fingers don’t get greasy and it lasts for longer.

Chili: Fork

Cilan: Oh, yeah, I’m going to stab my crunchy foods and make them fall apart like an absolute absentminded dunce, fool, clown, jester, like a monstrous moron, an idiot of Shakespearean proportions, a cretin.

Cress: Um, you seem to forget that ‘chips’ can also mean fries. And that’s probably what he was talking about, haha

Cilan: I did not forget anything. I purposely ignore the idea of using British vocabulary to do my part in helping it die out.

Cilan: KNOWLEDGE is knowing that a tomato is technically a fruit.

Cress: WISDOM is not putting it in a fruit salad.

Chili: PHILOSOPHY is wondering if a tomato is a fruit, does that make ketchup a smoothie?

Cheren: COMMON SENSE is knowing that ketchup isn't a smoothie.

Ingo: I went to the store and bought Quick Oats. The next day, my brother came back with Instant Oats. I will not be humiliated like this. I must now find an even sooner oat.

Hilbert: I hope nobody is evil

Ghetsis: >:)

Hilbert: Oh no

Elesa: Don’t post your negativity on a positive post.

Volkner: Electrons

Elesa: I should kick your ass.

Cilan: Being alive is great because there are so many different vegetables you can sauté. But then there are also the horrors.

Cheren: People who say ‘oof’ and people who say ‘bruh’ contribute nothing to a conversation.

Nate: OOF

Hilbert: BRUH

Ingo: Early to bed, early to rise, Burger King burger with Burger King fries

Skyla: Later to rise, later to bed, Burger King burger on Burger King bread

Elesa: Eat at morning, eat at night, I participate in a Burger King fight

Emmet: I slap my knees, I slap my thighs, tonight is the night that Burger King dies

Cheren: I currently have seven empty notebooks and I have no clue what to put in them.

Cilan: Put spaghetti in it.

Cheren: I am currently taking suggestions from everyone except you.

Bianca: Put spaghetti in it.

Cheren: I am currently taking suggestions from everyone except you two.

Nate: Put spaghetti in it.

Cheren: I am no longer taking suggestions.

Roxie: *playing guitar*

*suspicious crashing noises in distance*

Roxie: *plays guitar louder*

Hilbert: Big mood.

Emmet: What does that mean?

Hilbert: Well… it means, me too, I guess.

*the next day*

Ingo: I'm worried about Team Rocket using our subway system.

Emmet: Big mood, brother. Big mood.

Ingo: HILBERT WHAT HAVE YOU DONE

Hilbert: Z is just a sideways N

N: Please stop it

Hilbert: Zo

Elesa: I can't find my earbuds and Target is closed. This is a nightmare.

Burgh: Put a Durant in each ear and they will sing to you.

Elesa: Not a half-bad idea actually.

Emmet: I go to Home Depot

Emmet: I eat the tools

Ingo: Stop it

Emmet: Crumch

Roxie: Is it cheating to teach Toxic to every member of my Pokemon team?

Elesa: Not at all, I'd love to hear them sing it.

Clay: None of y’all know what propaganda actually is, do you?

Hilda: It’s when a British person takes a good look at something.

Elesa: What are you guys going to be for Halloween?

Ingo: Sad

Burgh: Gay

Skyla: Sexy

Emmet: Goblin

Ingo: What if I was evil and ran towards you at very fast speeds

Emmet: My arms are strong, I would catch you and hug you

Clay: Children, this is dirt.

Nate, Rosa, and Hugh: dirt? dirt? dirt? dirt? dirt?

Hilda: Shoutout to all the people who started saying “same” as a joke once in a while but now use it for the most random things like a car honking their horn at another car.

Cheren: Yesterday a book fell off my desk but instead of picking it up, I just looked at it for a second and said “same”

Hilbert: LOL same

Bianca: Why are we like this?

Cheren: Is there anything better than pussy?

Cheren: Yes, a really good book

Cheren: *plays the keyboard*

Hilbert: Who’s the hottest Uber driver you’ve ever had?

N: Ummm… I never went to Oovoo Javer.

*HAS NEVER WENT TO OOVOO JAVER*

Looker: Where’s the best place to buy fireworks?

Hugh: Wouldn’t you like to know, weather boy?

Looker: Where are your parents? Kid’s sketchy, back to you.

Emmet: *screams into jar and then screws on the lid* Everything’s fine.

Cilan: Hi, could I ask how exactly does one accidentally set a lemon on fire?

Nate: Microwave for 40 minutes

Cilan: Why were you microwaving a lemon??

Nate: I read boiling lemons helps cover up bad smells (I wanted to cover up the scent of burnt oranges), but I didn’t own any pots.

Cilan: Did you burn an orange too? How??

Nate: Microwave for 40 minutes

Classroom: *silence*

One of the students: turgle turgle

Cheren: WHO TURGLED

Hilda: Hey everyone, today my brother pushed me, so I'm starting a Kickstarter to put him down. Benefits of killing him would be that I get pushed way less—

Cheren: I get that you're angry, but killing Hilbert is not the solution.

Hilbert: When will Ted himself finally show up to the talk?

Bianca: The final boss

Cheren: Guys, you do realize that TED stands for Technology, Entertainment, and Design, right?

Hilda: I will not let Ted hide behind these lies any longer.

Cheren: I love the word methinks. It’s accurate. Me does think. Thinketh me do.

Hilbert: Methinks therefore me am.

Nate (bragging.): I know every digit of pi.

Nate: I don't know what order.

N: He doesn't know what order.

"Hey besties friendly reminder to drink water, feed your lab Rattata, turn off your evil nuclear generator, change out of your dirty lab coat, go for a walk, and take care of yourself!"

“@evilscientist13”

“@evilscientist13”

“@evilscientist13”

“COLRESS WAKE UP”

“@evilscientist13”

“@evilscientist13”

“@evilscientist13”

“COLRESS THE REACTOR”

(during a game of Uno)

Ingo: Brother, please, no.

Emmet: I’m sorry. I have to.

Ingo: Please, I’m begging you, after all we’ve been through?

Emmet: I’m sorry. [places a draw 4 card] Uno.

N: Any questions before I move on?

Porygon: *garbled electric noises*

N: ... Great. I really understood that well.

Elesa: This is camp.

Ingo: What does camp mean?

Emmet: Like when something is so yass and slay

Emmet: Do you think Joltiks take fall damage?

Ingo: Emmet, what the heck?

*at Drayden’s home in Opelucid City*

The Pokemon streaming service profiles read as follows:

Drayden: “Person who pays for the account”

Iris: “Granddaughter (Free pass)”

Ingo: “Parasite 1”

Emmet: “Parasite 2”

Cheren: How long does someone have to be dead before it's considered archaeology and not grave robbing?

Lenora: As an archaeologist, I find this a VERY AWKWARD QUESTION.

Cheren: Answer the question, grave robber.

Elesa: Carpe diem— seize the day

Skyla: Carpe noctem— seize the night

Emmet: Carpe natem— seize the ass

Ingo: Seriously, if you guys don't stop reblogging this, I am going to carpe someone's neck and break it.

Grimsley: Carpe collum— seize the neck

Cheren: Not all math puns are bad.

Cheren: Just sum of them.

Roxie: There is so much panic right now and not nearly enough disco.

Elesa: Where do bad rainbows go?

Skyla: …

Elesa: Prism. It's a light sentence.

Skyla: *groan*

Hilda: If you don't know the difference between "their," "they're", and "there", your a idiot.

Cheren: Well, this is awkward.

Hilbert: I was born ready!

Hilda: You were born in Nuvema Town.

Hilbert: When I was your age… (tells Hilda something he did a few minutes ago)

Nate: A theif

Cheren: Thief?

Nate: Theif

Cheren: I before e, except after c

Nate: Thceif

Cheren: No

Hilda: (singing) A potato flew around my room before you came—

Hilda, Hilbert, Cheren, and Bianca: AAAAAAAHHHHHH!

Hilbert: I'm nuts about these nuts. But you know what I'm also nuts about? My close good friends!

Hilbert: *gestures to Hilda, Cheren, Bianca, Nata, Rosa, Hugh, and N* My close good friends!

Ghetsis: Remember one time I liked you?

N: No.

Ghetsis: Good, because IT NEVER HAPPENED! *evil laugh*

Cilan: Would anyone like some stew? Would anyone like some stew? Would anyone like some stew?

[internet-girl-friend]

Sega Saga

7:49am - Sep 28

I truly do not have a minute to spare, but now that I have started blogging I can't stop. Something about living alone maybe. Anyway, today is moving day. I must transfer my entire life from the West End to East Van and make it to Fortune for Sega Bodega at 10pm. Wish me and my extremely generous friends luck.

October 2 aside

Okay, so I have not had wifi at my apartment (I still don't; I am, once again, writing this from my day job) and have not had the chance to write the rest of this post until now -- so so sorry to all five of you.

Back to September 28

After spending the entire day moving and cleaning my old apartment I was finally ready to take a few hours to get hot for the show. I showered, conceptualized fits, responded to all my ignored texts, and started my makeup when a text from Allison arrived.

"The show is at 7." It was 7:15.

We thought the show was at 10, but TicketWeb even sent a reminder email that it was an early one. FUCK. At least this time we weren't committing our typical faux pas of arriving much too early.

I threw on my uniform (black skirt, tights, plain black top, leather jacket) and left for the show with wet hair. My fit was so boring and my hair was such a mess that I had no choice but to wear my tits as accessories.

I was so frantic, you'll never guess what I forgot. My fucking camera. So all the pictures you'll see were taken by me on Allison's camera or by Allison herself.

We got there in time to see a couple songs from the opener, Lexc Stacy, and he was really sick but much higher energy than Sega Bodega, so I was thrown off by the choice. I find that electronic(-leaning) shows in Canada prioritize both sets being independently Cool over developing and maintaining energy in the room like they do in The Netherlands (where I lived (and partied) briefly). I like to think of building a setlist for electronic shows as curating vibes or like, interior designing more than it is about showcasing how fire the contents of your USB are -- but what do I know? I don't DJ, I just fuck 'em.

I saw a weird number of people I know at the show (as a transplant, this doesn't happen to me often) and the audience was COOL AND HOT AND SEXY and age appropriate. Needless to say I felt way more aligned with the audience at this show than I have at the last couple (haha). Everyone was vaguely alien-looking.

Sega Bodega's set had markedly bad sound issues and I really felt for him. Having the audio fuck up for a show where the vocals are so delicate and the production is so aggressive is detrimental. But I was thrilled regardless. People had great concert etiquette and seemed to really be there For The Music.

There was a really touching moment where Sega introduced Um Um (a heartfelt song about SOPHIE) and everyone fell silent except to sing along and no one took their phones out despite it being an obvious fan favourite. There are few moments at shows I feel I could cry (and have cried) during but hearing this live was one of them.

My brother described Sega Bodega in San Francisco as "a ghostly illusion," and I agree. There was so much fog that I kept losing track of where he was on stage but the effect was fitting, him seemingly materializing in new locations. But also, literally not a single photo I took worked out (which is slightly unsurprising given that I am used to using my own camera and don't really know how Allison's works).

The light show was magnificent and fit each song perfectly. At one point he mixed clips of SOPHIE's "It's Okay To Cry" and the lights flashed manically between red and white and the crowd warmed up and danced tons. By the time his set was done everyone wanted more.

Allison said the concert was bad and while I enjoyed it, I can understand why she thinks so. If I weren't as big a fan as I am I'd likely have been underwhelmed to no fault of Sega Bodega. My one wish is that I'd been in the pit.

He played no encore, but we collectively begged. The sound guy didn't turn the house music on or the house lights up quickly enough and it felt like an evil tease. If the audio guy was a house tech I hope that it was just an off night, otherwise, I hope he has good transferrable skills...

Allison and I met a really cool woman out front of Fortune who had friends who helped organize the following show, SadBoi. The Cool Girl mentioned that there was another party at Red Gate happening later. Had I not been exhausted and feeling ugly and mildly grumpy I'd have let the night take its course -- fun exists here if you chase it and have the chance to do your hair beforehand.

Cost Breakdown

One tall can @ Fortune: $12.00

Frantic Uber ride: $8.00

Ticket: $20.00

Total cost: $40.00

1 note = 1 prayer that I make rent next month <3

[struggle-but-its-all-ocean-floor]

https://x.com/seokjinbit/status/1823579993265594436

idk if you care, but regarding suga dui (and you did say we would probably update you) there is footage now out and it is as unspectacular as you can imagine. he drives an electronic scooter at less than walking speed and then falls down as he arrives home, police is there to pick him up. according to them, they wanted to simply help him and then smelled the alcohol, did the test and the rest is history.

his testimony and the footage show that he also drove that thing for about 500m, nothing more nothing less.

however, regarding his bac, that might actually be 0.227% or 2.27. in his initial apology he stated that he had a beer, the next newsreport stated that it was above 0.08% (note: they didn't give a specific number they simply said above), which was important because it meant that he would get his licence revoked. a big newspaper stated that the police told them it was 0.227%, neither the police nor hybe have come out to refute that or comment on it. and hybe did release another statement clarifying somethings so the obviously could have.

(would like to note that in some countries you can lose your licence if you ride your bike at 0.227% so this is not particularly bad or harsh or weird)

given the fact that the scooter he drove had a seat that's not detachable its classification is i think that of an electric scooter (there was some confusion over this both on the end of hybe and the police, maybe it is still ongoing), which could mean that in the eyes of the law the case is handled more similar to if he was driving a car. that's more about law stuff and not about the reality of the situation or how it is perceived. the fine he will have to pay will be pretty hefty i assume (but i assume he will have no problem paying it). given the very unspecular nature of the footage i also assume his reputation in korea will recover.

all in all, yeah this is a crime and i don't want to make light of dui (even on something that isn't a car). i think paying a fine and getting his licence revoked are perfectly fine consequences for his actions, but apart from that... what is there really to say?

Thanks for the update! I saw the footage too.

He never said he had a beer though. I've seen multiple Army accounts on Twitter refute that. I don't think he was even the one who said it - might've been Hybe or another source -, but the expression, which literally means having a drink (or a beer?), is used to mean "going out to drink" or something like that. Anyway, he didn't claim to only have drunk a beer. Regarding his alcohol level, if your BAC is 2.27% that supposedly means you are drunk drunk, but he drove in a straight line and only fell because his front wheel got caught in the sidewalk, and he got up fine too... I doubt he was that drunk.

My thoughts on the whole situation: Yoongi drove in a straight line at near walking speed so the chances of him injuring himself or others were low. Let's face it, even if you walk home drunk, which isn't illegal even if you are shit-faced, you can bump into someone, or cross the street without looking (or stumble onto the street) and get hit by a car. A fine is more than enough imo. Getting his license revoked isn't even necessary, because after the drama he went through, do you believe he will ever do that again? Especially with everyone's eyes on him... But I'm not saying getting his license revoked is wrong. Yoongi doesn't even need his license because he has money and resources to have someone drive him around.

Anyway, everyone was having a great time trashing him on Reddit, Twitter, and everywhere else, wanting him to leave the group and saying he would even go to jail lmao, but now the truth's out suddenly everyone's very quiet and no one cares about Suga anymore. Typical.

Thanks for the ask!

[jacobwren]

“Comicopera then becomes progressively darker during its middle section, The Here and Now, as its scope expands to take in the war in Iraq. As an Englishman whose democratically elected leader had trotted into combat behind Bush, Robert Wyatt felt implicated. A Beautiful War is about so-called smart bombs, which even the US Air Force now acknowledges weren’t quite as smart as was claimed at the time. Out of the Blue shifts perspective to the effect of those bombs as they fell to the ground. Alfie’s lyrics were inspired by TV footage of a Lebanese woman left stupefied after her house had been blown to smithereens. From the apparently innocent opening detail, ‘No need to wipe your feet, the welcome mat’s not there,’ the track builds over jarring, jagged electronics and shards of free-jazz brass. We hear that ‘something unbelievable has happened to the floor,’ that the stairs have gone, and finally that the house has been blown apart. The climax comes with the repeated line: ‘You’ve planted all your ever-lasting hatred in my heart.’ Robert’s voice remains neutral, but it is the angriest line he has ever recorded – and one, he says, he would never have written himself.” – Marcus O'Dair, Different Every Time: The Authorized Biography of Robert Wyatt

[translesbianvampire]

15 questions for 15 mutuals

(idk why it says 15 btw there really is only 13)

ty @emodennis 4 tagging me

were you named after anyone?

nah, tho i picked my last name from a cooler last name in our family line hehe. i picked a gender-neutral name that's femme 2 me. i dunno how much i wanna share my name on here, but...i love it

do you have kids?

nah, i don't particularly want kids but i also don't wanna close that door until i get there

do you use sarcasm a lot?

naw really? yeah i fuckin love sarcasm lol. i struggle to be understood properly when i wanna be, but also i fully embrace the confusion & chaos of communication. i love being an agent of chaos in a way, i love deadpan humor, and a lot of my comedic instinct is "what's the WORST thing i could say right now?". which i guess is part of why i love sunny.

though i also wanna say, i know how to be vulnerable & listen when it's needed of me !! i bite but i also know when not to bite. i don't want to hurt people. i don't want to hurt people

what's the first thing you notice about people?

i have no idea. everything i guess. vibe

what's your eye color?

dark brown

scary movies or happy endings?

on one hand, im a wimp and horror scares the life of me, but also, i love that horror explores, well, the inherent horrors of life. in some ways i want happy endings & in another, im fucking tired of seeing them.

any special talents?

im actually an electronic music producer of 8 years. i just dont rly like telling ppl abt it (sharing it directly), tho it's all publicly available online and easy 4 ppl 2 find/stumble upon lol. i think i should make a 2nd blog for my music stuff cus i know how 2 use tumblr now from my IASIP obsession. i dunno how much i'll link the two [if at all]

what are your hobbies?

besides music stuff, TV has gotten me into screenwriting, i like FPS games [on one hand i wanna branch out now but it's also my comfort zone in a weird way] especially CSGO/CS2 and NMRiH

have any pets?

nah

what sports do you play/have you played?

N/A tho i used 2 have a very small interest in basketball

how tall are you?

5'10" but i round up to 6'0" cus i wanna be 6'0" and i'm always wearing my 2" platform boots so i'm BASICALLY 6'0" (please just let me have this one thing lmao)

favorite subject in school?

prolly math cus it was ez for most my school life. til i got to calculus. then i fell apart and my big interest in math kinda died. but i still like numbers

dream job?

music stuff or something? i dunno lol. ill get there when i get there

tagging @bonithica @brainfogdennis @cowboycharmac @cutemeat @keenbugg @certifiedeccentric @chilledmac @dayglomasochism @lalosalamancaunofficial @season1mac @kathleenbrash27 @cowboycharmac @margle

[mywifeleftme]

292: Various Artists // Abstract Magazine Issue 5

Abstract Magazine Issue 5 Various Artists 1985, Sweatbox Just got up to flip the record after sitting cross-legged on the couch typing on my laptop for quite a bit, not realizing my leg had fallen asleep until I tried to plant on it and had to pinwheel my arms to keep from falling flat out and cracking my head into my turntable. Absolutely how the coroner will shoot my body someday too, ass-naked and alone on the floor of my apartment, surrounded by instruments I can’t play and books I haven’t gotten to, bleeding into my record collection with a scythe propped sardonically against the wall in the background.

Speaking of ignominious deaths, while doing some research on the compiler of today’s record, a post-punk compilation / fanzine combo from 1985, the first thing that came up was a 2007 post from Burl Veneer’s old Typepad blog, specifically this inimitable sentence: “Abstract was the brainchild of Rob Deacon, who died last month in a canoeing accident at age 42 (same as me).” Strange nautical coincidence that, and a neat trick for Burl to keep blogging after death too (in fact, he’s still at it here on Tumblr), but I kept link hopping, and have learned that Deacon was quite a special guy, and a pivotal figure in two or three generations of UK music.

There’s genuine fondness and grief in The Guardian obit, the kind they reserve for lesser-known people who busted their asses and made a difference behind the scenes in media, and they spell out a resume I’m a little ashamed not to have been more up on. He was in his late teens when he started Abstract magazine, profiling the cream of the post-punk crop and cajoling exclusive tracks out of a bunch of them. Abstract would eventually morph into his own label, the influential Sweatbox, but the magazine + compilation bug stuck with him, and he’d go on to start the CD-era Volume series, which moved real numbers for an indie comp and featured… Jesus, everybody, apparently. He followed that up with the groundbreaking Trance Europe Express and Trance Atlantic electronic compilations, became a dance night impresario, did music photography, started a label (Deviant)… and then he fell out of his fuckin’ boat. Damn.

Abstract #5 is a real time capsule of 1985, featuring songs and interviews with the likes of Swans, Gene Loves Jezebel, Cindytalk, Colourbox, and the Jazz Butcher, interspersed with record reviews, scene reports, comics and more. The written pieces are all over the place stylistically, some transcribed in a borderline-incoherent fashion, others fighting for their lives against the adventurous two-tone printed layouts, but it has a wonderful fanzine energy and a level of ballsy spite you don’t see much these days.

Nearly every artist has a bone to pick with their label or journalists or bands they used to like that sold out or fans who have any sort of expectations of them. (The editorial pages get into it too, describing Morrissey “prancing daffodilously” and previewing a new New Order tune called “I’ve Got a Cock Like the M1,” which would see daylight as “The Perfect Kiss.”)

It’s zany and vulnerable and, even just shy of 40 years later, totally inspiring stuff. Highlights include Swans’ Michael Gira’s typically serial killer-coded interview, in which he talks about watching TV for 14 hours a day and shares the trans body horrific lyrics to a song called “BASTARD” that would eventually come out during the band’s maniac 1986; an account from industrial music pioneers Test Dept of the ’84 miner’s strike in South Wales, with a photo of one member who appears to have two sets of upper teeth like a shark; and the 400 Blows talking about having recorded their contribution to the issue in an echoing drainage pipe in which they nearly became trapped and drowned.

Musically this is by design a mixed bag (side one is kind of the uncommercial, experimental bits; side two the peppier guitar pop stuff). None of these exclusives would make anyone’s definitive collection of any of these bands, but as a complete listening and reading experience, Abstract #5 is a beautiful celebration. Cheers to Rob.

292/365

[thosearentcrimes]

In the 1970s and 80s there was a chain of electronics stores in the New York media market that became quite famous for its over-the-top commercials. They hadn't invented that style of ad (which, as far as I can tell, rose and fell with the independent or small chain retail market), consisting of a very excited "insane" guy with a catchphrase about prices (His Prices Are INSAAAAANE!), but they flooded the Tri-State area airwaves with it.

I'm not really talking about this company because of their advertising, except in the sense that I am familiar with this company because my father told me the story of the ads once, while mentioning that he got some suspiciously cheap but good electronics there. You see, Crazy Eddie, named after primary ringleader Eddie Antar, was also a criminal enterprise and a fraud. According to one of the participants, Sam E. "Sammy" Antar, whose detailed and presumably highly misleading account of the case is available on his amazingly-named website White Collar Fraud, it had always been engaging in fraudulent accounting.

From its humble beginnings as a private company, profits were skimmed and employees were paid under the table, allowing the Antar family to, ah, manage their tax obligations. My understanding is that neither of these practices is or was particularly uncommon in the world of brick-and-mortar retail.

Now, as Crazy Eddie expanded, it became less and less reasonable to engage in petty fraud at that scale. What they had to do next was stop committing tax fraud. Not only would that allow them to avoid getting caught doing tax fraud, by progressively skimming less of the profit they would be able to appear to achieve an impressive rate of growth. This was all in preparation for the smart bit of the scheme, going public.

This is how it works. Stocks trade speculatively at a significant multiple of earnings. This means that if you control and own most of a company, if you can dump your own money into your company and then sell a significant amount of your stock, you can still easily come out well ahead. Soon, the Antars were painstakingly laundering money they had sucked out of Crazy Eddie while it was privately held back into the company past the not particularly vigilant auditors in order to look good to the financial markets.

Eventually the scheme started falling apart socially and financially, and the company suffered a hostile takeover from a competitor who subsequently found that there was $40 million less inventory than advertised. Caveat Emptor, I guess. Eddie Antar tried to flee to Israel but was extradited, upon later getting out of prison he tried to start another electronics retailer called Crazy Eddie, which surprisingly didn't work. Sammy Antar turned state's evidence and is now a fed-lite.

Why am I saying all this, why am I pointing out this particular case? Well, obviously it's because I think there are a lot of modern-day Antars running around making a lot of money, and presumably a lot of their CFOs are also going to flip and reinvent themselves as forensic auditors once they get caught. I assume most startups are somewhat more legal than anything Crazy Eddie did, but many of the market principles remain the same. In fact, corporate lawyers have developed more and more ways to do the same things the Antars did legitimately.

It is ironic that stealing from their own company was worthwhile for the Antars so long as the company was a serious business for them, albeit one that they were operating in a criminal manner, while pumping money into their company was only the correct thing to do once they were divesting themselves of ownership. Obviously this is just how tax evasion and pump and dumps work, but I find it contrasts interestingly with the capitalist dogma that ownership makes for better stewards of the property, still used as the primary political argument for privatization even though capitalist firms are also run managerially.

Ultimately, my takeaway is that the Antars were basically your regular shady retail guys, until they spotted an opportunity to get in on the ground floor of Shareholder Value Maximization. My other takeaway is if you get something cheap because someone is fucking the shareholders, mind your own business probably.

[unofficial-sean]

Life kinda, like, passes you by so quickly. Once moment a college student is popping your cherry--you can’t really feel your body, it’ll ass tingly and light headed--and now you’re approaching your mid-twenties and the gravity of everything sets in; the finite nature of life, the warped film of time and memories, and latent nature of firsts.

When I was 17, I dreamed of where I’d be now, but where I am is so far off the mark. I can’t even bottom, i don’t have a place of my own, my career is fragmented, and worse of all, I’m so alone in this struggle.Not only did I fail to achieve my goals, I’ve become a different person; alien to who I was when all I could thin about was getting railed and moving out of my small hometown.

Not that those were good admirations, but I’ve just completely lost sight of who I wanted to be. I’m so lost and there’s no guidance. As loathe as I was to accepting it, I had so many resources in high school. There were people there willing to help if i just had the wisdom to accept it. But now here I am.

in three months, I’ll be 24. Another year passed and I have still not achieved my goals. They’re not even possible, now. And that should be fine, but part of me still wants that. Part of me still wants to get railed and have people over and live a more risky life. But all I can do now is top at best. Maybe I work some job. Gets me enough to survive and pay for my ROV research on the weekends. That’s all I have left.

I recognized that working for the Army was soul sucking,and so I’ve got multiple interviews in the private sectors for electronics work. But I jsut know it won’t give me purpose.

Everyone says “be yourself and you’ll find your people.’ But when I do that, I’m always alone. If I go out to the ocean with my ROV, who will saunter on up and take interest? How to I meet my people when all I do is solitary? I fantasize that someone asks what I’m doing, and I explain that I’m observing sharks, and they get interested, and I show them how to use the ROV controller, and l et them explore and focus on the marine life that catches their eye, and we form a friendship. But in reality, everyone on the shore is focused on their own things.

There is no guide anymore. There are no resources. I can’t figure out which side of me people like, and I can’t even get brief sexual gratification anymore.It seems whoever I am, personally, professionally, romantically, and sexually, is so undesirable. Even though I’m being myself. I fell so stuck.

I can’t stop crying. The life i wanted was robbed from me,and the best i can do with my circumstance is not good enough. I don’t have the personality of a dominant top. I’m a subby bottom that can’t bottom. I like myself shaved and lithe but toned. And that’ fine for a bottom, but not for a top. I can’t fit any space. I’m just this malformed creature,

N one wants to talk with me. N one matches my passion. I don't’ even care if it’s unrelated to my interests. I can spill about all there is to know about sharks, and I’ll never meet someone with that same spark for anything. Am I overwhelming? Am I dry? None of this shit gets spilled when I talk to people; it should come up when I  talk to my therapist, but my therapist is only available for one hour every two weeks. She’s never there when I need her most.

It’s not your responsibility to comfort me. My therapist would likely just tell me to focus on myself or whatever. I’ve been doing that. All the advice there is to give, I’ve heard.

I don’t think I’m inadequate. Inherently, I like myself. If I could clone myself, we’d get alone. But I really struggle to understand why other people don’t seems to like me. Whether it’s at a glace, after an interaction, or after months of friendship. I don’t understand what I’m doing wrong. I never get an answer.,. I get ghosted. I get left to pick up the pieces and form my own conclusions. All that’s ever done is force me to be harsh to myself; to self criticize; to pick myself apart before I can put myself back together.

I’m not perfect. I struggle to understand socialization. I can’t tell wish face people want to see. I’m too afraid to make compliments or advances because I can’t tell if what I’m saying is charming or harassment. When I keep to myself, no one gets in. When I push too far, I’m reprimanded. I long for a space where the words I say are not taken with such dire nature.

I want to be soft. I wanted to be feminine and womanly. And maybe i still can. But how many people really, truly want a feminine person to top them? How many people want to truly put  up with infodumping and the sensitivities of an autistic person? What can I even do to form connections when my messages are never read?

There is no guide. No help. I could have died today, and I’d have died without ever knowing a woman’s touch. Without ever feeling that delicacy. I’ve had men, sure, but that I’ve never felt; not intimately. I could have left this world without ever having touched a shark. Or left being a research paper. The only person who’d really miss me is my dad, And he doesn’t really know who I am.

I make my intent known and I wait. but how much waiting must i do before I recognize the reality and let it go? I am who I am. And I’m going to sleep.