#and ed’s eyes widen and then looks at stede the way he did when he hushed him in the auxiliary wardrobe

[patheticwhimsy]

now i’m imagining stede twirling around in the cursed suit some more after doing his punch and his eye catching on the box. he opens it thinking it’ll be jewelry but sees it’s lube and is like you know what, i think i’ll need this anyway with how hot i look in this fit and steals it

[iris-in-the-rain]

Stede has never had an understanding family. He's used to disparaging or downright snide comments. He used to try to explain his point of view, but all he got was 'You just can't take a joke, can you?' or 'So I can't even tell you what I think?' or 'I'm just gonna stop talking to you, you're impossible to have a conversation with!'

And Stede tried, he really did, but it was never good enough. So eventually whenever anyone said anything mean to him, he just hung his head and took it. Of course that was also wrong, but he just couldn't win.

When he met Ed, he just couldn't believe his luck. Ed was the loveliest, sweetest person Stede has ever met! He was kind, goofy and made Stede laugh like nobody else! Stede didn't think he deserved him, and so of course, in true Stede-fashion, as his father once called his behaviour, he had to go and fuck it up.

Ed and him were dating for just over three months, and things were going really well. They'd been sleeping together for four weeks and there were absolutely no complaints there either.

They'd had a date night and after they came back to Ed's place. It was a lovely dinner, but afterwards neither felt particularly up for anything else than kissing, and perhaps Ed picked up on Stede feeling a bit off, and so both cuddled up and fell asleep.

Until Stede woke up feeling really weird. He glanced at Ed, sleeping soundly, and after debating for a few seconds whether to wake him, he untangled himself from Ed's arms and tiptoed to the bathroom, which was down the hall.

He grimaced, clutching his stomach. Oh, he was not feeling well! The face looking back at him in the mirror was pale, sweat beading on his hairline. Oh no.

He was going to be sick. Tears sprung to his eyes. No no no! Not here! Not again!

The memory of being sick when he was little came back to him, his father telling him to sort himself out, as thirteen year old Stede tried to stifle his sobs, while not really understanding what happened. He was feeling poorly, how was that his fault?! But it must have been, as his father angrily shouted that he was an idiot for eating that much candy. He was an idiot then, and he was being an idiot now. There was that time when he'd been sick at a work do, and nobody let him live it down, despite the fact that his drink was spiked by the Badminton brothers. Both admitted to it afterwards, while laughing, and telling Stede that they only did it to loosen him up, and it was his own fault for being like he was. Since then, Stede lived in a perpetual state of guilt. Things were his fault, of course they were. Even if they were not, they must have been. Right?

And now again. They had such a nice dinner, the food was great and now he was feeling ill for no reason! Idiot. Idiot! Why did it have to happen while he was at Ed's?

Stede started shaking. He was going to be sick, he couldn't stop it and then he was.

Tears silently ran down his face as he flushed the toilet. He was shivering now. Oh, he hoped he didn't wake up Ed. After rinsing his mouth, as quietly as he could, he shakily made his way to the kitchen for some water.

As he'd been to Ed's before, he knew where everything was, but in the dark, he opened a wrong cabinet and the next thing he knew he was standing in the kitchen with the light on, smashed glass around him and a wide-eyed Ed in front of him.

'Stede, what the hell, man?'

Stede immediately shrank back. He fucked it up after all, for all that he tried, and now Ed knew and he was angry, and he was gonna dump him, for the stupid, pathetic mess that Stede was.

'I'm sorry, I'M SORRYY!'

Ed's face immediately morphed into pure concern.

'Woah, Stede, hey...'

Stede swayed, his bare feet close to the broken shards of glass on the floor.

Ed's arm shot out to steady him.

'Babe, hey... Hey, what's wrong?'

Stede's tears returned in full force.

'I'm ss-sorry, Ed, I'm so sorry! I, I was sick and...' Ed's eyes widened at that. 'And, and I know it's my fault, and I just wanted ss-some water but I broke your glass and I'm sorry, Ed, I'm sorry and I'll go, I'll just...'

But he didn't get to finish his rambling, because he was suddenly pressed into Ed's warm chest, his beloved's arms around him, as Ed pressed a kiss to his head, shushing him gently.

'Love, it's okay, shh. Don't apologise, it's okay, come on...'

Ed held Stede close to him, as he steered them back to the bedroom.

'Ed no, the glass, your feet!!'

'Honey, it's okay, we're okay.'

Ed led Stede back to bed, and held him close as they sat down. Stede started weeping again, trying to muffle the sound, as Ed held him even closer. After a few minutes, Stede tried to pull back.

'Bathroom, I need...' He swiped at his face. 'I'm disgusting, I need to... my face, m-my teeth...'

'Honey, you're not disgusting. You're not!' Ed added, as Stede started to protest. 'Come on, sit back on the bed, and I'll sort everything out, okay? It's okay, I promise. I'll be back in a few moments'

After pressing a kiss to Stede's forehead, Ed left the bedroom, returning with a bowl of warm water, towels, abd Stede's toothbrush. He also brought a bottle of water.

'Hey babe, come on, let's get you cleaned up, okay?'

Wetting one of the towels, he gently wiped Stede's face. He then handed him the bottle of water.

'Small sips, love, that's it.' Ed brushed Stede's hair out of his eyes. 'Brought your toothbrush, just clean your teeth, your mouth must feel grotty. Spit in the bucket, that's good.'

Fresh tears ran down Stede's cheeks.

'I'm sorry, Ed, you shouldn't have to d-deal with this, I know it's my own f-fault and...'

'Hey Stede, no no. You're poorly, it can't be helped. It is absolutely not your fault...'

'I can go...'

'Honey, it's okay, I promise. I'm not angry about anything, I just want you to feel better.'

At Stede's continued distress, Ed's eyes glistened with emotion. 'I love... that you're here, and I want you to be here, even if you're not feeling well. Especially then! I want to look after you.'

Ed's fingers cupped Stede's cheek.

'How you feeling now, honey? Ready to lie down? I'm just gonna get one more thing, okay?'

With that, Ed left the bedroom, returning few minutes later, holding a hot water bottle.

'Come on, love, scootch over a little.' He booped Stede's nose and pressed a soft kiss to his mouth, before Stede could protest.

'Come on, the hot water bottle will help your tummy' Ed started adjusting Stede's pillows until the latter was in a position where he felt comfortable, before pulling the comforter over them both and snuggling up to Stede's side.

'Is that okay, love? Do you need anything else?'

Looking into Ed's big eyes, Stede took a shaky breath and brought up Ed's hand to kiss it.

'How did I get so lucky, my darling?' The question was whispered as if Stede was being scared to hear the answer.

A glowing smile lit up Ed's face.

'I'm the lucky one.'

'But...'

'But nothing. I'm so lucky that I found you, babe. I don't know who made you feel like you had to hide when you needed help but I never want you to hide from me. Never, Stede. Okay? Please, love.'

Stede wanted to protest, he did. His mind was still trying to scream at him, years of gaslighting and conditioning to hide himself warring with Ed's words, but for the first time ever, he felt safe. He believed Ed. He snuggled closer.

'Okay.'

He felt Ed's smile against his shoulder, as their intertwined hands rested on his stomach. He was okay. He was understood. It wasn't his fault. And he didn't have to hide anymore. With Ed, he was finally safe.

[fluffyllamas-23]

Okay so nobody asked for this, and I promise I am working on the prompts in my inbox. But I just finished season 1 of OFMD again and now I’m mad at Stede for doing what he did. So here’s an AU where they’re actually happy lmao. Ed owns a restaurant and Stede owns a bookshop.

Stede ducks into one of the restaurants on his way from his bookshop to the parking garage. He closes his umbrella and stomps on the mat in front of the door to dry off his shoes. It’s been pouring for the better part of last night and all this morning, and although he’s only been walking for a couple of minutes, he’s wet and cold and in the mood to warm up. 

He was planning on just getting in his car and going home, but it had smelled so good when he walked past. 

Blackbeard’s Bar & Grill. He’d been meaning to try it out, but since it’s a fairly new restaurant, he hadn’t had the chance yet. 

Until now, at least.

It’s an unassuming restaurant from the outside - some seating, a chalkboard listing the specials for the week, and a few plants adorning the front. When he steps inside, though, he immediately feels comforted, and he’s not sure exactly how or why. It feels like the perfect place to bring a book and curl up in one of the big chairs by the fireplace. 

He feels like he’s home. 

Despite how chill the ambiance is inside, it’s bustling with activity. There are people at nearly every table, and the bar is full.  As he glances around the room, trying to find a waitress or someone who can seat him. 

As he looks around the room, his eyes fall on what must be the most beautiful human being he’s ever seen in his life.  The man is behind the bar, chatting with a customer. His face is bright and vibrant, and he throws his head back as he laughs at whatever the customer said to him. His long, gray hair is pulled back into a low bun with a few tendrils out, framing his (beautiful, beautiful) face.

Stede’s got butterflies in his stomach that increases tenfold as the man looks at him and they lock eyes. 

He says something to the customer, never taking his eyes off of Stede, and then he’s walking over to him. 

Stede’s eyes widen as he approaches him.  

“Hi, there,” the man says softly, flashing him a charming grin. “I’m Ed. Welcome to my bar. Can I seat you?”

“H-hi,” Stede says, clearing his throat. He bites his lip to try and keep from smiling like an idiot. His eyes drop to the ground as maintaining eye contact suddenly makes him way more nervous than it ever has before. 

Ed leads him to a table in the corner, apologizing that it’s the only table he has available, but offers a booth if Stede doesn’t mind waiting. Stede declines the offer - he’s starving and all he wants to do is sit down and eat whatever it is that smells so good. 

He ends up staying all night, past closing. He and Ed have fallen deep into conversation, and soon, the night turns into the early hours of the morning. It’s hands down the best night Stede has had in the longest time. 

Ed feels the same, really. 

Stede makes Blackbeard’s Bar & Grill a regular stop after he leaves work for the day, and Ed learns to look forward to 5pm every day. 

They talk every time he comes in - sometimes Ed is so busy that he only has time for a brief conversation, other times (which, let’s be real, is most of the time), he sits with Stede and they talk for hours. 

Perks of being the owner.

They talk about everything. They talk about how Stede was married once, years ago, but things ended because neither of them were in love, and Stede realized he was gay. They talk about how Ed hasn’t had a real relationship…ever. He’s had a lot of one night stands, but no real, solid partnership, and all he wants is to have a significant other that he can come home to at night. Someone to love who loves him. They talk about their friends, their hobbies, their hopes and dreams and what they want out of life. Before they know it, they’re alternating who’s place they sleep at each night and spending most weekends together.

The relationship just feels so easy and so right. It’s like they’re both the missing puzzle piece the other didn’t realize their lives were missing. 

They just…fit.

*

“Oh, Ed!” Stede chirps out, pushing the front door open with his foot as he balances the drink carrier in one hand, and bags food in the other. 

He and Ed had decided to take the day off and spend it together. They’ve been dating for eight months at this point, and they like to do this once or twice every couple of months. They like to just be able to focus on each other and nothing else. 

Stede suggested they do that today when he noticed just how tired and rundown Ed has seemed lately. He figures Ed could probably use a day off to recharge and reset.

Ed was still asleep when Stede had woken up, and he figured he’d run out to their favorite breakfast place to pick up something to surprise Ed with.  

“Stede?” A hoarse, sleepy voice calls from the bedroom. “That you?”

Stede winces. Ed sounds like he just woke up, and he’s kicking himself for not coming in quieter. 

He sets everything down on the table. “Sorry! Were you asleep? Thought when you texted me earlier you were up for the day.”

Ed doesn’t respond immediately, but from the other room, Stede hears shuffling, and then coughing. Stede grimaces. So that’s why he’s seemed so rundown lately. He’d been getting sick.

“Fuck,” Ed croaks, rubbing his chest. He trudges out of the bedroom,  “I think I must have dozed off after I texted you. Sorry”

“That’s okay,” Stede frowns. “Ed…are you okay? You don’t sound great.”

“Think I'm sick,” Ed croaks, scowling as he rubs at his nose. “Pain in the fuckin’ ass.”

“Sit down,” Stede instructs, gesturing to the couch. “What do you need, sweetheart? Have you had any medicine?”

Ed shakes his head, dropping down onto the couch, “not yet…been hoping I could will it away by the time you got back.”

He looks so put out and offended that he hadn’t been able to accomplish that, and Stede does his best not to laugh at the situation. 

Stede’s lips quirk, “how’s that working for you?”

Ed shrugs, slumping back into the cushions while Stede rifles through the medicine cabinet.  “Not great. I think it’s a lost cause.”

“I think it is too, darling. Here,” Stede says, handing him a glass of water and two pills. “These should help.”

Ed’s quiet for a few moments, and then, in a small voice, “sorry I’m ruining our day off.”

“Ed, look at me,” Stede frowns, crouching down in front of him, cupping his cheek. “What are you talking about? You’re not ruining anything. I’m just sorry you’re sick.”

Ed averts his gaze, “it’s probably not a big deal. I just need a nap.”

“Okay,” Stede nods. He tucks a lock of Ed’s hair behind his ear and kisses his forehead, lips lingering a second longer than normal to try and feel for a fever. He doesn’t feel warm, and Stede is hoping it stays that way.  “Let’s start with a nap, then. Want to go back to the bedroom? I’ll be right there.”

By the time Stede makes his way into the bedroom, Ed is all settled in bed, half asleep.  When Stede walks in, he gives him a sleepy grin. 

“Thought you’d never come.”

Stede climbs into bed next to him, smiling softly as Ed immediately curls up against him.  He rests his head on Stede’s chest, draping an arm across his middle. Stede strokes Ed’s hair. “And miss an opportunity to snuggle with my best guy? Never.”

*

Ed wakes with a start, chest heaving as he glances around the room wildly. He can’t remember what he was dreaming about, but he knows that whatever it was, was enough to send him into a panic. He needs to calm down, because all it’s making him do is cough, and cough, and cough.

Stede is right there, shushing him and petting his hair until he’s finally calmed down enough to take stock of how he’s feeling. 

He feels like ass, for lack of a better word. 

His head is throbbing, pulsating in his eyes and forehead. He can feel the congestion shifting in his head, and he turns away from Stede to muffle a harsh double into the blankets.  He sniffles a few times, which triggers another rough coughing fit. He grimaces - his throat feels raw, like he’s been screaming for hours.  

“Bless you,” Stede winces, rubbing his back. “I was going to ask how you’re feeling, but I think I have my answer.”

Ed groans, burying his face in Stede’s chest. “I hate this.”

His voice is nearly gone, and talking hurts. 

He coughs a few more times, eyelids drooping as a shiver runs down his spine. He can’t remember the last time he was sick, and he had forgotten just how awful it is. 

On the bright side, now he’s with Stede and he finally doesn’t have to deal with any of this by himself.

Stede smooths Ed’s hair back, “how’s tea sound, hmm?”

“Fucking amazing,” Ed croaks, looking up at Stede.

“I want to find the thermometer, too,” he says, pressing a hand to Ed’s forehead. “You’re burning up. Let me up. I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

Ed forces himself up and off of Stede, a feat in and of itself. His muscles ache and protest every movement he makes, and all he wants is for whatever the hell he caught to fuck right off to where it came from. 

He flops backwards into the pillows, his lungs feel like they’re rubbing together with each cough, and they feel like they’re threatening to eject themselves from his chest. 

All he feels up to is lying here while Stede takes care of everything, and normally that would make him feel guilty, but you know what?

After all of the years he’s spent on his own, having to take care of himself and after all the years he hasn’t had anyone to lean on, he really loves being able to just lay there and not do anything. 

And he loves Stede.

[thevoicefromanotherworld]

"WHO THE FUCK IS SHE?"

-So crew, what did we catch today? - asked Stede, coming out of his cabin.

He was in a good mood that day. After Blackbeard's return, the captain of the Revenge was more active than ever. He approached his crew who were positioned in front of one of the port masts.

-What are you doing? - he asked, looking at the post.

-We're trying to perfect our knots - said Oluwande - you know, so when we have prisoners they don't escape like last time.

-Well, that's very good Olu - said Stede, looking at Jim and the others. - And what are you doing?

-Watching - answered Buttons - you can learn a lot just by watching another person.

-I agree - replied Stede smiling - very well, if you need anything you know where to find me.

Suddenly a loud bang was heard from the bottom of the ship and everyone leaned over the deck to look at what had happened. Izzy had stuck the boat too close to the outside of the boat and had chipped the paint. Stede watched him for a few seconds before hearing a door open behind him. He turned around and saw Ed coming out towards him.

"What happened? I heard a pretty loud bang," he asked and Stede pointed down.

"It was him," the blond pointed at him.

"Yeah, the bastard ruined the paint, damn it," Jim growled under his breath. "Now I'll have to go down and paint it again."

Stede looked at the boat, and noticed that Blackbeard's friend wasn't alone in the boat. He widened his eyes and pointed at the bundle he was holding as he climbed up the wooden ladder that would take him to the deck of the boat.

"Izzy, you can't treat people like that!" he said, pointing at the person on his back as if he were a sack of potatoes.

"Stede's right, man. Who the fuck is that?" -Ed asked, pointing at her-

The crew moved aside to let him pass and he quickly stuck the young woman to the post they had been looking at before and pointed at Oluwande and Black Pete.

-Tie her up, I have to question her- he said, cracking his fingers-

-Great! So we can practice tying knots! -Pete cheered, and the two of them grabbed a couple of ropes and tied the young woman up-

-For the record, I don't approve of this- said Stede, looking at the stranger, who was just now waking up from her stupor-

-I don't care, Bonnet- replied Izzy pointing at her- she's a thief and a liar, and she deserves to be punished for it-

-That's it! Punishment, punishment, punishment! - the whole crew began to chant-

-That's enough! -Stede asked, raising his hands. There was silence and he looked at Ed. -Is this okay with you?

He tilted his head, looking at the blond and the crew behind him.

-It depends on what she did, but you know that I'm always in favor of mutilations, torture… -he began to list and nodded- well, death in general.

Stede rolled his eyes and gestured for Izzy to come closer. He obeyed and the captain of the Revenge whispered:

-Ask her whatever you want, but please don't kill her.

-I don't promise anything -Izzy replied before slapping the prisoner, making her eyes widen.

-Who…? -As soon as she saw him, an amused smile crossed her lips- Ah, it's you -she said- I thought you had been eaten by a shark

Blackbeard laughed and looked at Stede while pointing at her

-It's good -he said and Stede nodded while they continued to pay attention to the interrogation-

-You think you're very funny, don't you? -Izzy asked, taking his knife out of the belt he wore around his hips, he ran it over her cheek and she let out a moan when she noticed the cold material on her hot skin- We'll see if you still find it funny when I tear your skin off in strips if you don't tell me what I want to know

-And what do you want to know? -she asked, he momentarily removed the knife-

-Why were you hanging around the boat? What are you up to?

-Nothing, I was just watching it -he looked at Stede and Blackbeard- you have a very nice boat by the way

-Thanks! It's actually a design of mine, I had it built… -the blond began, but Ed put his hand on his shoulder shaking his head, making him see that it wasn't the time, he nodded and let Izzy continue-

-You have to believe me when I tell you that I haven't done anything to it -he said referring to the ship- I was just passing by and I stayed a moment to observe it carefully, I had never seen a ship with such a level of detail as this one

Stede, seeing that the young woman was pouring out praise for his ship, realized that it didn't make sense to let Izzy kill her, or worse yet, to expel her from the ship without letting her return. She approached him and Izzy looked at him out of the corner of her eye, confused.

-What the hell are you doing? -she asked abruptly when she saw the interrogation interrupted-

-I'm sorry -said Stede- but we can't kill her

-Why not? -he raised the knife towards her- she is a liar, I don't believe anything that comes out of her filthy mouth

-What Stede wants to say -he said

Blackbeard, who had approached without anyone noticing, said, "You have two options," he said, looking at the young woman. "We release you and you go back where you came from, or you join us."

"How?" Black Pete asked, horrified. "No way. Do you want him to kill us all while we sleep?"

"Stede is right," said Buttons.

"Okay, guys, but if you were in his situation, wouldn't you like to stay here instead of going back to sea alone?"

The crew remained silent until Lucius reluctantly nodded, holding Stede's journal to his chest.

"You're right," he looked at the young woman. "Can you write?"

"Yes," she replied, and Lucius smiled.

"Perfect, I can be the second scribe."

"Sounds good to me," she replied. "Can you let me go now?"

Stede and Blackbeard glanced at Izzy, who rolled his eyes and shook his head.

“It’s okay,” he muttered. “You bunch of weaklings.”

He undid the girl’s ties and she felt her cheeks to get circulation back in them. He had really tied her up pretty tight. This Izzy stood next to Blackbeard who made a gesture with both hands encompassing the ship.

“Welcome to the Revenge!” he said.

“We hope you like it,” Stede added smiling.

“Anything’s better than spending the nights on a desert island with no food or water,” he said, nodding. “Thanks for letting me stay.”

“Of course,” Stede replied politely. “Oh, wow!” We haven't introduced ourselves, I'm…

-I know who you are -she cut him off trying not to be rude- you're the pirate gentleman

-See -she said looking at Ed- I told you it was a good name

-Whatever you say -Ed agreed-

-And you're Blackbeard, the best pirate of all time -she narrowed her eyes- Where's your beard? If it's not too bold to ask

-Oh no, not at all -Stede replied waving his hand to play it down-

Ed glanced at her out of the corner of his eye before looking at her again

-Let's just say that some idiot convinced me to cut it

-It suits you -she replied nodding-

-I told you so -Stede replied smiling at him, the pirate returned the gesture-

-So, what's your name? - asked Blackbeard, watching her curiously.

-Will the Swan - she replied - but everyone calls me ten

-Why Ten? - asked Jim curiously -

-Because that's the number of cuts I need to kill someone - he replied smiling -

-Wow, you're good! - said Ed - we're going to be good friends, you and I

-Of course - confirmed Stede looking at him - welcome aboard, ten

-Thanks guys - he whispered, unable to contain his emotion -

New day, new adventure

[quiet-compassion]

OFMD Fluffvember Day 9: Nose Boop

https://archiveofourown.org/works/51607360

It’s certainly been a mixed bag of a day in Stede’s estimation. From the highs of finding a truly remarkable suit—one that really looked like it was made to fit him, if he did say so himself—to the lows of being forced to relinquish said suit for the good of the crew, he supposes it’s all a wash. But if the morning and afternoon left something to be desired, the night has been wonderful. Walking hand in hand with Ed, catching up with each other in the light of the moon, it’s perfect.

He’s missed this, the quiet comfortability of just being together. To say nothing of the excitement and the fire of finally being able to kiss Ed, of pulling him into his arms, running his hands through Ed’s hair exactly the way he’d been dreaming of doing for weeks.

But, they’re going to take things slow. Which is…good. Great actually. First and foremost because it’s what Ed wants. But also because he’s right; the two of them could stand to be a little less fly-by-night, especially when it comes to something as important as one another. And Stede can do slow. Lord knows he was slow enough on the uptake the first go round, not picking up on his or Ed’s feelings until Mary had practically spelled it out for him.

For now, it’s enough to be back together, on the same ship, breathing the same air. Yes, Stede thinks to himself as he listens to Ed tell him all about his conversation with…Kevin, apparently, this is more than enough.

“Well, good night I guess,” Ed says, cat bell jingling as he lets go of Stede’s hand and abruptly turns to leave.

Stede feels like he’s been dunked in the ocean. “What? Good night? Where are you going?”

Ed turns back to him looking about as bewildered as Stede feels. “Uh…figured I’d go find a spot to crash for the night,” he says, gesturing behind him with his thumb.

This does little to clarify Stede’s confusion. “Crash? Below deck?”

“Yeah, but don’t worry, mate,” Ed replies, throwing up his hands placatingly. “I’ll stay away from the rest of the crew. Not trying to freak anybody out. I’ll just camp out in the ball room or something, assuming no one’s in there. Worst comes to worst, I’ll nip up to the crow’s nest. Then I’ll be out of everyone’s way.”

Stede stands there blinking at him for a moment, brows furrowed and mouth open, before pulling himself together. “I—I think there’s been a mixup.”

Ed raises his eyebrows. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, why would you sleep in the crow’s nest when there’s a perfectly good cabin right here?” He gestures to the door they’re standing in front of.

Ed’s eyes widen before he drops his gaze to the floor. “Well I’m on probation, right? So I just assumed…I figured the cabin was too nice.”

“Edward, the probation is about helping everybody to feel comfortable around you again. It’s not about punishing you.”

He gives an awkward laugh at that. “I think the crew would beg to differ.”

Stede stands up a bit straighter. “I’m the captain.” Ed’s head snaps up to look at him at his tone. “And I say you’ve suffered enough. Everyone has.”

They stand staring at each other in silence, Ed with an unreadable expression and Stede clinging to his commanding persona. After a moment, he deflates a bit, reaching out tentatively to touch Ed’s arm.

“Look, if you don’t want to, that’s perfectly alright. But I want you to get a good night’s rest and be comfortable. So, if you’re up for it, I’d love for you to share my cabin,” he says gently.

A tiny smile blooms on Ed’s face before morphing into something hesitant and considering. “And we’re still…taking it slow?”

Stede smiles reassuringly. “Yes, of course.”

There’s another beat. Then Ed shimmies forward bashfully. “I think I might like that.”

Stede takes his hand again and pushes open the cabin door. Once inside, the reality and logistics of the situation hit him. Gone are the comfy couch and the chaise lounge that once furnished the room. The only things left are a chair that has seen better days, a knife-marked desk, and a bed that might be generously described as “cozy”.

“Uh…hmmm.” 

Ed sighs, letting out another embarrassed laugh. “It’s fine, mate. I can sleep on the floor.”

“That won’t be comfortable at all!” Stede protests.

“Hey, I’m the reason the stuff’s all gone. I think it’s only fair.”

“I thought I told you, I’m not interested in placing blame. You deserve to sleep well. Someplace nice, and soft, and warm.”

“Warm,” Ed repeats to himself under his breath.

Suddenly, Stede has an idea. “How about this! Why don’t we grab a couple of spare bed rolls from up on deck? We can lay them out and move the mattress onto the floor. That way we’ll have a padded spot that’s roomy enough for both of us. There’ll be space, between us, I mean. So, still slow.” He finishes lamely, watching Ed closely for his reaction.

“Yeah, alright then,” he agrees with a nod.

“Great! Be back in a jiff!”

Bed rolls obtained, they get to work cobbling together their little nest. To Stede’s delight (and moderate shock) it works out just as he envisioned, pretty spacious and decently comfortable. They lay down side by side, several inches between them, each looking up at the ceiling.

“Thanks,” Ed whispers after a few minutes.

“Of course. It’s no trouble. Well,” Stede amends with a shrug, “it was a bit. But you’re worth it.”

He can see Ed smile out of the corner of his eye. 

“You know, I was thinking. Just because we’re going slow doesn’t mean we have to avoid touching each other like we’ve got the plague.” Ed turns his head to face Stede.

“Oh? Okay. What did you have in mind?” he asks, eyes still on the shiplap above him.

“Well…I liked what we landed on before. Holding hands.”

“Ah, me too,” Stede says, reaching over to grab Ed’s hand and entwining their fingers. “How’s that?”

“Nice. And you could, you know, look at me.”

Stede chuckles nervously. “Right.”

He turns over onto his side, facing Ed who smiles at him.

“Hi.”

“Hey.”

Ed reaches out with his free hand to stroke Stede’s shoulder lightly, the bell around his neck jingling with the movement. On instinct, Stede reaches out and boops him on the tip of his nose. There’s a stunned and slightly awkward pause.

“Too much?” Stede asks with a grimace.

But Ed just shrugs. “Kinda liked it.”

They both break out into silly grins, unable to stop staring at each other. 

“Night night,” Stede whispers, eyes still open.

“Yep,” Ed replies without breaking their gaze.

Yes, Stede thinks as he lays there on their pile of blankets, this is more than enough.

[offthefieldsmau]

⚽ 2.172

When Stede arrived, Ed was still dropping red cones down onto the field. A speaker on the bench played easy listening soft-rock. The crimson contrasted with the lush green of the soccer field as Ed bent over to place it down in order.

Stede had to rip his eyes away (and up) when Ed turned around.

“Oh, hi,” and he sounded surprised and looked over Stede’s shoulder “where’s Alma?”

Stede set her duffle down on one of the bleachers, “At Mary’s, but she forgot her gear at mine.” A small breeze passed between them as they held each other’s gaze. Stede gave Ed a cursory once-over:

His stupid shorts were a modest size, but the bastard had thighs. They drew Stede in like a dream (a wet one at that) and he couldn’t help but bite his bottom lip. Biceps nearly bulged out of Ed’s tight dri-fit long sleeve shirt as he crossed his arms over his chest. 

“So Lucius—” Ed started, right as Stede began to say, “Well, I better—”

Their sentences died between them. 

“I, uh,” Stede jerked a thumb behind them, “I can go wait by the stands.”

“What?” Ed let a somewhat shocked laugh out, “You’re staying?”

“Of course I am!” Stede’s brow pinched, “Why wouldn’t I— is it so unbelievable to think I’d like to watch a practice?”

Ed rolled his eyes, “Yes. Besides, you can’t miss out on uh,” he distracted himself by pulling more red cones out of his bag, “book club, yeah?”

Stede froze, “Actually, I’m not going to book club anymore,” nervous fingers toyed with the end of his shirt, “as they have all made it abundantly clear they don’t need me.”

“Stede,” Ed reached a hand out carefully, “they didn’t mean it—”

“Oh, so you did see it, then, how lovely,” and he quickly wiped the sadness from his face. “Besides, I don’t need pity; least of all yours. Don’t you, uh,” Stede glanced to the left at the empty parking lot, crossing his arms and shrugging, he leaned forward into Ed’s space to stage-whisper, “have some teenagers to torment?”

“Only if you stick around long enough to get flustered.” Ed wasn’t going to take Stede’s shit today, so he stepped closer, and enjoyed the sight of Stede’s eyes widening. Ed took another step, “Y’know for all the ways you piss me off,” he backed Stede up against the side of the bleachers to whisper, “‘s kinda hot when you get going.”

“Oh piss off,” Stede turned his face away, but Ed had one hand anchored beside Stede’s head, “you’re fucking with me.”

“What?” Ed chuckled, leaning in, “I would never,” and if he was going to fuck with Stede, he might as well go all in; he ran his knuckles up the other’s bicep, “well, maybe a little. I like it when I make you blush.”

“Only when I’m rightfully angry at you,” Stede turned his face back to Ed and the hitch in his breath sounded so loud when he registered the heated look in Ed’s eyes, “especially when you’re being an arsehole.”

“And what am I being right now?” Ed grinned, “Since you’re, y’know, blushing.”

“A tease,” Stede hissed, and it didn’t help that his eyes were focused on Ed’s lips. Ed narrowed his focus on the other, and a small, panicked expression overtook Stede when Ed’s mouth turned to a smile. The icing on top was watching the slow part of Stede’s lips as Ed took his time licking his own.

Ed let his lips come close enough for his breath to ghost over Stede’s own mouth, “God, you wanna kiss me so bad right now, it’s making you forget what you hate about me, yeah?” He couldn’t help the smile that widened, “Can’t think about anything other than what it’s like?”

Something seemed to snap in Stede’s resolve.

“What’s it like?” Stede asked and Ed had him. Like, “wrapped around his finger,” had him.

“Maybe one day you’ll find out,” and Ed was a bastard and did the bastardly thing of winking at Stede, “Tiger.”

[indestructiblelittlefuckers]

Ed's eyes widened as Izzy mentions Low. It couldn't be.... could it? If nothing else Izzy's presence here showed that everything was possible. Which meant two things. One, he had to keep Izzy away from this fucker, who was clearly trying to get back to Ed and Stede. Two, he had to make sure Stede found out only after Low was dead, for good this time. Both tasks would be rather difficult, especially the first.

❝Izzy you can't go to him.❞ How was he supposed to convince him when he couldn't even get Izzy to remember him? Fuck ❝Look man, I know you don't remember me and that you don't trust me, but I'm sure you know that this guy is...a twat.❞ He tried to say it the way Izzy did, emphasising the word, but it made him tear up again ❝He knows me. He knows you, who you were before. He was probably plannin' somethin' but I think now we've got the advantage. Please come with me. Please. I will get you somewhere safe and then I will deal with him.❞ There were still plenty around that admired and respected Israel Hands. They'd gladly help Ed for both parts. Or Anne and Mary. They knew him too, they'd keep him more than safe. But he had to convince him first ❝Please, Iz.❞ This had to work, he couldn't let him just go, especially not to Low. It had to work. ❝We've... we've known each other for more than 30 years, you must... there must be a part of you that feels that you can trust me❞.

The man halted, closing his eyes with a frustrated sigh as Ed moved to stand in front of him. Frustrated at being blocked from heading back to the ship once again. He could practically hear the Captain snapping at him for being late. The thought of disappointing him making him feel uncomfortable and antsy.

He was becoming impatient and was about to just start walking away when Ed mentioned his tattoo. A chill ran through him and he looked down at his gloved hands. The left thumb running over the back of the right hand where the tattoo lay. How... how did this other man know about the tattoo when he always wore gloves? How had he known about his ring....?

When Ed spoke about his scars, his breath wavered to the point he had to swallow it down. Clenching his jaw as he took a single step back, wavering on his feet whilst blinking his eyes for a few moments before looking down and to the side. Left hand now gripping at the right.

He knew about his scars...

No one knew about his scars...

He drew in a shaky breath, blinking back strange and confusing emotions that he didn't understand. Slightly unfocused eyes slowly searching around the busy market.

He barely heard what Ed said next, talking about how he had apparently been his first mate, his head feeling light and confused before he drew in a deep breath in an attempt to compose himself.

"I n-need to get this supplies back... I-if i'm late, Captain Low will... I need to go...."

[black-stede]

ED LOOKS AWAY THE ENTIRE FIGHT SCENE BETWEEN IZZY AND STEDE

he looks back when things start to go in stede’s favor, but as soon as the tides turn back he looks away

he can’t see the man he loves die and it kills him that there’s nothing he can do to stop it so he turns his back on the fight and grasps the ropes hanging in front of him to keep purchase

and then he hears metal sinking into flesh and he flinches and his grip tightens on the ropes because stede was stabbed he’s going to die he is going to be killed and he won’t look

“did I do it right?” stede asks ed, “he missed all the important bits”

and a small kernel of hope forms in ed because wait a minute… did stede… is he going to live?

and he turns and takes in the scene in front of him and the sword is indeed sunken into his left side and the man is still talking, voice strained but strong as he tells izzy about the cherry wood and ed’s eyes widen because wait this just might work and he can’t believe his eyes he can’t believe he’s this lucky

and then the sword handle breaks and everyone’s cheering because izzy lost and their captain is still alive and stede’s alive he’s alive he’s alive the one good thing in his life is still there and breathing and living

ed shrugs at izzy as the man looks to him in rage because stede won against all odds. and then he moves towards the impaled man and pats his hand on his shoulder and his mind is already running through options of how to get that damned sword out of stede because he’s alive he’s going to live and ed is going to keep it that way

[izzy-b-hands]

Lucius thinks maybe some gay sex will make Izzy better, or at least feel better? His theory needs proving, in other words, and what better way than to just literally test it by *checks papers* treating Izzy like a human being with feelings, treating him nicely, taking in interest in what he does (even if that is basically work and work alone usually), and finally treating him to a night out in a port with some shopping.

---

"You're cool if I fuck him?"

Pete nodded. "Not only that, but I want to make it a bet."

Lucius scoffed. "Are you doubting my skills?"

"Not you, I just mean that..." Pete hesitated and gestured towards Izzy. "He is... himself, ya know? Might not be an achievable thing."

"I don't believe that," Lucius said briskly. "I'm not only going to fuck him, but he might even be bearable as a person once I'm done."

--

"Can I help?"

Izzy frowned. "Why?"

Lucius picked up the nearby broom. "Why not? You always encourage us to do chores more often, so...here I am!"

Izzy nodded. "Broom is infested with spiders."

Lucius looked to his hand on the broom, eyes widening at the tiny black dots starting to crawl all over it.

"We should get a new one," Lucius smiled sheepishly and did his best not to drop the broom on Izzy as he shoved it away. As it was, he surely already shook off a spider or two in his direction on accident.

"You can let the captains know that," Izzy said.

They stood awkwardly for a moment.

"What did you come down here to do?" Lucius asked once the silence started to make his skin crawl. "I'd be happy to help."

"I don't think you would."

"You don't know that!"

Izzy shrugged. "Fine. You won't want to, but fine. Sick of arguing with the lot of you today."

He led Lucius further down the hall, into the jam room. There, a corner of the room had been reconfigured for his purposes.

"Oh," Lucius said as they sat in the corner. "These are a bunch of Ed's shirts."

"Aye."

"Are you...do you darn all his clothes for him?"

Izzy nodded, and picked up a purple crop top. "Thread is in the basket behind you."

He reached in and tossed Izzy a bundle of purple thread. "How often do you do this?"

"At least once a week. Used to be more, when he was with Jack more often. You can imagine how that went."

Lucius nodded and grimaced. "Does Ed know about this?"

"Presume so. That, or he doesn't care so long as his clothes show back up clean and fixed."

"I'm sure he cares," Lucius said. "He must wonder how his stuff keeps getting fixed up."

"He's got other things to worry about. That's part of what a first mate does, not that any of you would know that. Except maybe Olu. You take on everything else so your captain can concern himself with things that are actually important."

Lucius let the conversation die again. It was making him sad for Izzy, and that was a weird feeling he wasn't sure what to do with yet.

So they stayed silent. He helped grab Izzy new thread as he needed it, and folded the finished shirts as Izzy handed them over.

"Bored?"

Lucius shrugged. "Not really. Kind of nice, sitting away from everyone else for a bit."

Izzy stood with a soft groan, and retrieved the pile of shirts. "Planning to keep following me?"

"For now. If you don't mind."

"No stranger than anything else anyone's done on this godforsaken ship."

They traipsed back up and he followed Izzy to Ed and Stede's quarters.

Their captains were engaged in each other, though still clothed as they tangled on one of the new couches they'd stolen.

Lucius frowned when neither of them so much as looked up at their entering the room. They didn't say a word at Izzy putting away Ed's clothes for him. Not even a glance.

"That wasn't cool," Lucius muttered as they left. "He could have said thank you."

"Blackbeard doesn't need to thank me for doing my job," Izzy said.

"Yeah, I can't agree with that," Lucius said. "Let's get lunch and I'll explain."

"Unlike the rest of you," Izzy sighed. "I don't waste any of my time during the day with that."

"Literally all you've had is coffee," Lucius said. "You need food."

He took Izzy's hand and was pleasantly surprised when Izzy let himself be led towards the galley. Might have been out of shock, but he was going to take it as a win anyway.

--

They walked in, and the galley cleared out.

"Ah," Lucius started, but Izzy waved him off.

"That's normal. Understandable. Anyway, what do you want?"

"I can get my own food," Lucius sighed. "Turn off work mode for two minutes, and eat."

Izzy promptly got a cup of coffee, and sat at the table.

"I know you did that to irritate me, and I don't care," Lucius said with a smirk. "And I'll show you why."

He grabbed one of the few square plates they still had, and piled it full with the leftovers Roach had yet to put away: fresh hardtack that wasn't actually as hard as a rock yet, boiled chunks of potato, and sandwiches. He grabbed three of the latter; it wasn't subtle, but he didn't need subtle right now.

He sat across from Izzy, and popped a potato chunk into his mouth.

Izzy's eyes ran over the plate as he sipped his coffee. But he didn't say a word.

"Don't see you eat much at dinner either," Lucius said in between bites. "Or do you seriously survive on coffee alone?"

"I'll find something at night," Izzy replied. "Usually. Need something to do while on watch anyway."

"That's really unhealthy," Lucius said. "Besides, you must be hungry. I won't force you, but-"

He moved the plate to be more in the middle of the table. "Feel free. I won't tell if you don't."

He was still shocked when Izzy took a sandwich, quickly, as if he expected Lucius to try and take it away.

--

Over the rest of the day, they:

-brought Ed and Stede numerous cups of tea or coffee, with Izzy so oddly attuned to their usual general schedule that he just Knew when to motion towards the galley and then find the captains, who at least smiled at him each time. Lucius had been hoping for at least one thank you, though.

-Did more laundry. Not just repairing everyone's clothes, gathered from the various corners claimed as storage by each person, but washing them in an old wash bucket Lucius didn't even know they had below deck. The line to hang them went from one side of the jam room to the other, where the light could filter through from the deck above and help dry everything.

-Cleaned more than he thought was possible in one day. From swabbing the deck to watching Izzy scrub and chip away at the barnacles on the hull. He helped in bits and pieces, mostly handing Izzy whatever he asked for.

Finally, Izzy paused in front of his room. "Well. That's it, for now."

Lucius nodded. "Time for a break! You deserve it."

Izzy didn't seem to know what to do with that. "I guess? I usually stop long enough to nap before night's watch."

"You can't be assigned watch every night," Lucius chuckled. "Where's the chart Captain Stede put up?"

Izzy led him to it, a short distance as it was now tacked onto one of the walls in the closet Izzy had taken over as his room.

On it, everyone else's name had been scratched off.

"Did you do this?" Lucius asked. "Izzy..."

"I got sick and fucking tired of waking up and finding the deck empty," Izzy scowled. "No one in the crow's nest. Buttons is sometimes out there of course, but he's moonbathing then. So, yeah. I took it, crossed out everyone else, and I take watch every night now. At least it gets done then."

Lucius nodded. "I'm sorry. You shouldn't have had to do that."

"What?"

"You sleep a little, and I'll meet you tonight for watch, okay?"

He walked out with Izzy still muttering in confusion. He needed to talk with the captains.

--

"So, it's just. Really weird to me that no one noticed and addressed this earlier," Lucius concluded. "I mean, I hate some of the stuff that needs doing and I'm not exactly eager for it, but..."

"Let him do it then," Ed shrugged. "If it makes him happy."

Lucius scoffed. "That's it?"

"I think someone might be a little sweet on Izzy," Stede smiled. "That's kind of you, Lucius."

"What the fuck is going on here?" Lucius asked in shock. "I know you two can be bitchy, as can we all, but what the fuck?"

"Lucius!" Stede said sharply. "I could ask the same of you!"

"Maybe I just realized how much he does and how that's like...all he does, and if that was me I'd want help! Or a break, or at least some acknowledgement!"

"He's a first mate," Ed said gently. "He knew what that meant when he took the promotion."

"Wow," Lucius said. "So, what about chores makes him happiest, do you think?"

Ed blinked, and opened his mouth to speak.

"Because I think he couldn't tell me or you two what actually makes him happy, because he doesn't think about anything besides work and how to keep living off of mostly coffee. Did you know he usually skips lunch? I had to tease him with food until he finally broke down and ate something!" Lucius said sternly. "If you care about your first mate like you say, then that means caring about him beyond his ability to wash and rehem your shirts!"

He turned on his heel and walked away before they could get another word in. They could let that all marinate in their minds and figure out how they could be better. For once, they could do that part on their own.

--

"Brought you this," Lucius handed Izzy a wrapped sandwich. "Had Roach make it fresh before he went to bed."

"He did not agree to make me food this late," Izzy said, but he took the sandwich.

"I may have told him it was for me, but what he doesn't know won't hurt him."

The crew had taken to sleeping below deck, after a few squalls had taken them by surprise and soaked them to the skin. That meant an eerily silent and empty deck to traverse.

"You can eat," Lucius encouraged him gently. "I can help keep an eye out while you do."

Izzy looked at him, seemingly studying him. Then, he considered the sandwich in his hand.

"Alright."

They settled up in the crow's nest, so Lucius could easily see out, and Izzy could sit and relax while he ate.

"This is sort of nice," Lucius remarked as he watched the moonlight glimmer off the crest of each new wave. "Sandwich good?"

He looked, and had to laugh. The sandwich was gone, in the blink of an eye nearly.

"Did you taste it?"

Izzy nodded. "Thank you for that."

"Of course. Someone has to keep you from wasting away on us."

The tension that fell was a new one. An expected one, for Lucius, though he hadn't thought they'd get there in one day. Leave it to Izzy to surprise him with lingering glances and a hand creeping closer to his.

"You can go to bed, if you want."

Lucius frowned. There was the usual Izzy. "I'm good, actually. Unless you'd rather be alone."

He waited for the gruff command to fuck off, but it didn't come.

--

He didn't want to be smothering, so he let Izzy be for the next day or so. Checked in, brought him food, but otherwise let him get about his business. Ed and Stede seemed to be paying extra attention to that as well, and he didn't want to distract them from seeing that Izzy, for all his faults, did clearly care about all of them and the ship. If he didn't, why would he bother with all the work he did? He could just as easily have left and joined a different crew, a more traditional one.

But he didn't, and Lucius felt like that was important.

On Friday, he changed it up again.

"So, you know how Pete is happy to share me and have fun with everyone now and again," the words tumbled out. "And I thought maybe, since we're stopping at a port for the next night or two, I could take you out."

Izzy stared, and Lucius worried he'd actually broken him.

"Me? How much did everyone else bet you to do this?"

Lucius shook his head. Pete had never formally made his mentioned bet anyway. "No one bet me. No one is making me. I want to."

Izzy couldn't seem to look him in the eyes, but he nodded.

"That would be fine."

--

"I figure shopping, food, inn?"

Izzy nodded. "You told the captains we'd be gone?"

Lucius couldn't hold back a roll of the eyes. "Yes, Izzy. They know we'll be on land for tonight and at least part of tomorrow. It's all good."

"I just don't want them wondering why things aren't getting done, that's all. You can't tell me you'd want to listen to that whining if we'd get back and find them out of the loop, thinking we'd fucked off to who knew where."

"That's true," Lucius admitted. "Come on. I have an idea."

He knew very well that Izzy had nothing for clothes aside from what he wore. He'd watched him strip down to clean and hang them to dry for fuck's sake, sitting in nothing but his underclothes while he waited to be able to dress again.

"I know it isn't anything as fancy as Captain Stede wears, but I also know you like your leather anyway," Lucius said as he led Izzy into the shop. Its walls were mainly lined with leather clothing, but there were linen and cotton blouses too, all in black or dark navy or deep plum. Nothing bright or airy, but if that wasn't what Izzy wanted, then why bother with it?

"We can't afford this," Izzy said. "For either of us."

"When was the last time you got new clothes?"

Izzy glared and thought. "1709."

"That shirt has survived almost ten years?!"

Izzy looked down at his shirt. "It isn't that bad."

"I can see through parts of it!"

"It's usually warm anyway, that is a feature, not a fault!"

"Oh my god...my point is, you deserve something new! You can still wear that thing until it disintegrates into a fine dust, but at least you'll have another option!"

He expected Izzy to fight against being pulled into a dressing room, but he didn't. Nor did he fuss at Lucius coming in with him, calling out to the tailor what would need adjusting before they left.

To his delight and shock, Izzy left the shop in one entirely new outfit, and with an extra new shirt.

"See, not so bad, right?" Lucius asked as they dodged people walking the main path.

"Could we stop at the room?"

He nodded. "Of course! There's no rush to do anything else right away. We can go out later and get food, could even bring it back to the room with us for the night!"

There was tension again, but he wasn't entirely sure which kind now as they made their way to the dingy building that had the gall to call itself an inn.

"Hey, I know this was kind of a lot," Lucius said as they got inside the room. "And I sprung the shopping thing on you at random, I know. I just had heard about the shop and figured-"

Izzy damn near actually threw himself at him, with enough force to make Lucius stumble as he caught him.

The kiss was just as forceful, which he didn't mind. It wasn't anger behind it like some of Izzy's other actions. It was want and need and an urgency Lucius was more than familiar with himself.

"Is that a thank you?" he asked softly after Izzy broke the kiss.

Izzy looked stunned. "You aren't upset."

"No? Why would I be? Honestly, if you hadn't made a move tonight then I would have at least asked if you were interested or not."

Izzy still looked stuck, wheels turning in his head.

"Come here," Lucius pulled him towards the bed. "Be lazy with me. We'll go out and find food later."

He didn't expect Izzy would fall into it so quickly, without any grumbling. But he kicked off his shoes by Lucius', and tossed his new black leather vest to the floor, only to promptly pick it back up.

"Doesn't feel right, doing that," Izzy blushed. "It'll take enough abuse later as it is."

"You're cute," Lucius smiled. He meant it genuinely. It was adorable watching Izzy brush nonexistent dust off the vest before gently setting it over the chair in the corner of the room.

"I think you must have me confused with someone else," Izzy said.

"No, I don't," Lucius replied. "The bed is cold; come warm me up."

That he didn't have to ask twice.

Izzy climbed onto the bed and into his arms, and after a moment, relaxed there.

He melted into the lazy slow kisses Lucius gave him, kissing back with unexpected but welcomed wandering hands.

"Just take it off," Lucius teased after Izzy's hands lingered under his shirt for the third time in as many minutes. "Take yours off too, while you're at it."

Izzy sat up, tossed his shirt off, and waited for Lucius to do the same. Fingertips tapping, eyes wandering over Lucius.

"You can't wait, can you?" Lucius asked. "I'm not teasing. Just asking."

He finally pulled off and tossed his shirt away. "Come here."

He'd always figured Izzy was a better lay than he might have seemed. There was far too much passion (for his job, Ed) overall for it not to exist in the same capacity in bed.

Now, with Izzy in his lap kissing him breathless, it seemed he had proof. The start of some, at least.

A hand toyed at the waistband of his trousers. Izzy kissed him again, gently, before asking: "May I?"

"I appreciate the asking and you absolutely may," Lucius smiled. "I didn't know if fucking would be a step too far too fast-"

"We can play it by ear," Izzy said as he climbed off of Lucius so they could finish undressing. "If we don't want to do everything, we don't have to."

Lucius nodded and let himself stare.

It wasn't like he'd ever have said Izzy wasn't hot. He was; from the silver in his hair (that if he kept growing it, would be fun to tug and play with) to the hair that covered his chest and the strong muscles that were on show regularly if one followed Izzy around while he worked.

But that was while he'd still held more distaste for Izzy, more frustration. Now, knowing more of Izzy meant it was an active and warm attraction that left him dying to find a way to show it more.

He finished stripping, waited for Izzy to do the same, then walked to him. Kissed him hard once, before dropping to his knees to open his mouth and let his tongue loll out. He didn't want to leave any question about what he wanted next.

"Fuck," Izzy murmured, a hand reaching out to cup Lucius' face in his hand. "How does Pete get anything else done if you do this around him?"

"I figured you would say you knew exactly why he doesn't get more done now," Lucius teased. "I'm a horrible distraction."

"A distraction maybe," Izzy said, as Lucius leaned into his hand enough to press a kiss to it. "But not horrible."

"I almost think you like me."

"I think I might."

[run-me-through-but-not-like-that]

Four's a Charm (SteddyHands x Reader)

I told you I was working on it and I've finally posted the prologue! Other chapters will be longer. Please let me know what you think!

Read it here or on ao3:

Chapter 1. Prologue

Word Count: 1633

As soon as the leather clad pirates tore their gaze away from the deck, where you and the crew scrambled about in order to look busy, you took the opportunity to hurry down into the ship. Once out of sight, you let out a breath, calming yourself before approaching the captain’s cabin. You let yourself in without knocking, something you had become used to doing with Stede, he never seemed to mind.

“How ya feeling, Captain?” you asked, taking in his appearance. He was sitting on the overly fancy couch, at least for a pirate ship, and looking much better than he had days ago. You had to give credit where credit was due, he was recovering well.

“Considering having not long been stabbed, pretty peachy” Stede assured you with a genuine smile, earning a small chuckle from you.

“Glad to hear it, you’re looking better already” you observed. Stede nodded in thanks before patting the place on the couch beside him, inviting you to take a seat. You did so without question, making yourself comfortable. “So…Blackbeard…” you awkwardly changed the topic, wanting to know what the hell was going on. The crew was worried that Blackbeard and his crew would end up throwing them overboard and taking the ship. So far, that didn’t seem to be their plan, but it was a worry you all had.

“Yes, it looks like he’ll be staying for a little while. He seems like a lovely fellow” Stede’s description was certainly surprising consider all the other stories you had heard about Blackbeard, but it was obvious that the two seemed to hit it off, quickly developing some sort of friendship.

“Lovely? Really?” you raised your eyebrows at him, “I mean, I’m no seasoned pirate, as you know, but I’ve heard of the legendary Blackbeard and…well the stories don’t describe him as lovely.”

“Well, it turns out that his name is Ed, and he likes the way we do things here” he sounded proud but you supposed you would be too if an infamous pirate captain told you that you were doing a good job.

“He does?” you didn’t mean to sound so surprised. You liked Stede, you really did, you would consider yourself pretty close to him, but you weren’t in denial about his skills and experience as a captain.

“He does” Stede nodded, the pride in his smile only growing.

“Well, I’m glad…surprised but glad” you gave him a supportive smile, still none the wiser of what the future of the crew would be.

“I showed him my secret passageway” Stede announced, completely catching you off guard.

“Uh…that was quick” your eyes widened. The two of you had become good friends but you didn’t realise that you were that close-then it hit you. “Oh! You mean your wardrobe!” you realised, your voice coming out louder than you meant it too.

“Of course, what did you think I mea-oh…” Stede’s eyes widened as his face turned a light shade of red. “Oh, no, yes, my wardrobe, not…” his words drifted off as his gaze bounced around the room.

Putting him out of misery, you spoke before he could continue. “Don’t worry, I get it. Sorry about that” you chuckled, though your apology was sincere, you really hadn’t meant to make him uncomfortable or anything. Still, you couldn’t help but notice that he looked rather cute when he blushed. “So, what did he think?” you asked, making s change in conversation for him.

“I think he think I’m pretty…cool” his little look of pride returned as he straightened his posture and widened his shoulders slightly.

“Really?” you really needed to work on masking your tone a little, but you really couldn’t go around offending your captain like this…

“You don’t need to sound so surprised” he huffed, deflating once again.

“Sorry, Captain, that honestly wasn’t what I meant. I think you’re cool. Just a bit weird that Blackbeard is on our ship, I guess” you apologised, attempting to explain yourself.

Thankfully, Stede seemed to understand what you had really meant, silently forgiving you. “I suppose it is strange. He is much more pleasant than his little friend, though” he mused, displaying clear distaste for the first hand.

“Yeah…Izzy, right? The crew have met him, don’t think he has many fans” you agreed with a small sigh. He had been the only real trouble so far.

“Perhaps he will come around, though I don’t much care if he does” you couldn’t help but laugh a little at his words. It was rare to see Stede so openly disliking somebody, but you imagined Izzy deserved it from the encounters you’ve had with him.

“Alright, I better get back to it, just wanted to come and check in on you” you sighed as you stood up, straightening out your jacket.

“Well, thank you, that’s very thoughtful” Stede smiled up at you.

“I’ll see you later, captain” you nodded politely before heading towards the door.

“See you later” your heard him say just as you pulled the door open, only to freeze when you saw the dark figure standing on the other side of the door.

“Blackbeard, Sir…I…” you hadn’t spoken directly with the man yet and you had no idea how to address him, or if you should say anything for that matter.

“Is your captain here?” Blackbeard asked, looking at you with no clear emotion on his face. You couldn’t tell what he was thinking.

“Oh yeah, of course. I was just heading back to work; I’ll leave you both to it” you nodded, words a little more rushed than you would have liked.

“Thank you” he nodded, surprising you when he stepped to the side to let you pass.

You nodded your thanks before scurrying past him and back up to the deck. Did Blackbeard just thank you for getting out of his way? The stories you had heard suggested that he was more likely to just stab you for getting in his way. Okay, so maybe he’s not exactly who you had expected him to be and maybe that wasn’t a bad thing.

"This is weird, right?" you slowly lent over to Lucius, who sat beside you, so that nobody could else could hear you. Though, you could probably speak at a normal volume, and nobody would pay much mind to what you were saying because they were too focused on the performance in front of them.

"Very weird" Lucius nodded, unable to tear his gaze away, silently trying to figure out what was going on.

"But good weird or bad weird?" you asked because you truly couldn’t decide.

"I'm not sure...I couldn't say" Lucius confessed. Still, neither of you had torn your gaze away from the two captains, neither had anyone else. Yeah, weird had to be the best way to describe what you were all seeing.

"I thought Blackbeard was supposed to be...scary and ruthless. I mean, he kinda was at first but..." your words drifted off as you watched Stede do his little impression.

"...but now he's dressed up in Stede's clothes" Lucius finished for you, turning his attention to the way Blackbeard flapped the loose sleeves of Stede’s shirt about.

"Yea exactly" you nodded. "I mean...this could be a good thing, right? Maybe he'll teach Stede some things and we'll be more than just some mediocre pirates" you suggested, trying to be optimistic.

"Or he's just playing some game before he kills us all" Lucius was apparently taking the pessimistic route.

"Oh God" you groaned, hiding your face in your hands.

"But y'know, you're thing might be right too" Lucius weakly encourage as he lent closer to you.

"Very reassuring" you mumbled, turning your head to peak out at him. 

"Well, from what I've experienced, he's better than his first hand" he reminded you.

"Yeah. What is that guy's problem?" you huffed, removing your face from your hands and leaning back comfortably.

"He's just a strange little man" Lucius shrugged.

"Lucius!" Stede’s voice interrupted you both, making you snap your attention towards them. And there they were, the two captains, dressed in each other’s clothing and imitating each other as if they had been lifelong friends. "Are you writing this down?" your captain asked.

"Duty calls" Lucius sighed, grabbing Stede's diary from beside him and walking over to the two captains. You just chuckled, shaking your head at him.

That had been weeks ago. Now Edward’s presence, along with the three of his men, had become normal on the ship. Fang and Ivan had mostly adapted to Stede’s way of running a crew, slowly integrating into the crew, much to their first hand’s displeasure. Stede and Edward had declared themselves ‘co-captains’ and had been doing pretty well with making it work. Once again, much to the first hand’s displeasure.

It was no secret that the two captains had grown close during Edward’s time on the ship, an unlikely friendship but it didn’t seem like he or his crew would be leaving anytime soon. Though, Stede’s crew didn’t mind, things were going smoothly, and Edward was surprisingly pleasant to have around. Of course, the infamous Blackbeard was more experienced and intimidating than Stede but you all soon learnt that he wasn’t as quick to violence as the stories would suggest.

In general, everyone had adjusted to their new captains and the new way that the ship was being ran. Everyone but Izzy Hands, of course. Izzy hated Stede fucking Bonnet, he hated how large and nice the ship was for such an inexperienced ‘pirate’, he hated the mediocre crew, how they manipulated Ivan and Fang into their sensitive way of life, he hated how the crew and Stede had changed Ed – no, Blackbeard.

[avastyetwats]

Stede just couldn't stop kissing him. He was addicted to it. To him. To the feel of his lips against his own, to the taste of him, the sounds he made, the way his arms felt around his body or his hands cupping his face, and very much addicted to the way their bodies felt close together. Pressed together. Exactly as they were now with Stede on top of his lap, chest to chest, with their hands holding each other's face.

He was both out of breath yet full of air with each and every kiss, because that's just what Israel Hands did for him, he left him breathless and he filled him with life.

So he kept kissing him, over and over and over again and even laughing when he did. "Hard not to kiss you in this moment, Israel. If I die from lack of oxygen, at least it will have been while kissing you." What sweeter death would there be? Though, Stede didn't want to die. Gods, no. Certainly not before marrying the man he loved most in this world. The man that agreed to marry him in return. Him. Stede Bonnet. THE Israel Hands agreed to marry him. Wanted to marry him. They've been together for so many months now, little over a year, and still Stede had moments of shock over Izzy being with him. Being in love with him. Choosing him. But oh, he was filled with such unbridled joy because of it. Stede had never known love like this, he's never known happiness like this. He's never known romance and excitement and belonging. It was with his crew that he found it. It was with, and because of, Israel Hands that he had all of that and so much more.

Wait.

Stede's heart suddenly dropped into his stomach. Izzy stopped the kiss, put some distance between them and started frantically looking around. If he hadn't kept him on his lap while looking around, Stede would've thought he was taking back accepting his proposal. That he broke the kiss and told him to wait because he was changing his mind. He did have quite the horrible habit of jumping to the worst possible conclusions instantly... but instead he's looking for something and Stede isn't quite sure what. "Izzy, are you alright? What are--" Before he can even finish asking his question, Izzy is reaching for his tie... his tie that holds his mother's ring. He scoots back a little when he sits up, watching as he unties it with the purpose of freeing the ring and-- oh god.

Is he going to-- No. No, of course he isn't. Not his mother's ring. It's the most precious thing to him, something he keeps with him at all times. Surely he isn't going to--

Oh my god.

His jaw goes agape and his eyes widen, his heart skipping a beat and then several, butterflies filling his tummy, the air is knocked out of his longs - he's rendered speechless. And that's something near impossible to accomplish. But Israel Hands knows just how to do it. It wasn't the first time, but this was probably the most stunned Stede Bonnet has ever felt. "Israel..." He finds only one word, his name, and it's uttered in shock and awe as he holds up his ring under the moonlight and Stede admires it with his eyes. Doesn't dare touch it yet. He knows how important this is to him. How precious. It's the only thing that connects him to his mother aside from his memories. Memories that he has shared with Stede. Memories that he hasn't shared with anyone else except for Stede. Not even Ed. Memories that Stede held precious to him, that he remembered every detail told to him by Izzy. Gods, he loved when he shared such important moments with him. He loved when he felt so safe to do so. Whether good, bad or tragic, he shared with Stede and it meant everything to him. He never turned him away, he never scolded him for crying. Gods, no. He welcomed him with open arms that closed around him any chance he was able. He laughed with him, he held him while he cried, he cherished every single moment Israel shared any important memory with him. Especially of his mother.

This was also a moment of trust. Of the utmost. Because he was trusting Stede with the thing most precious to him. As clumsy and accident prone as he was, if something was dear to him, he took care of it. Whether material objects or something far more precious such as Israel's heart. He took care of what, and who, he loved most and he would do the same with this ring. With his mother. With his heart.

He takes his hand and Stede's heart is already fluttering. His eyes are full of tears, but he won't sob. Not yet. God, he wants to, but he wants Izzy to be able to do this without Stede ruining it. So he waits and watches, his heart racing, the butterflies fluttering about in his tummy, the tears already falling from his eyes, his hand shaking. And when he holds it in front of his pinky, he lets out a tearful chuckle, but given his fingers are likely bigger than his mother's, it makes the most sense. And he'll wear it anywhere. With pride.

“ Stede Bonnet, will you do this ragged, old sea dog the greatest *fuckin’* honor by marrying me? “

"Oh, my god." He sounds shocked like he didn't just propose only a few minutes ago. He just didn't expect this in return, but oh, was he so fucking happy. Over the moon as made obvious with the way the tears are now flowing after trying so hard not to cry. But he couldn't help it. He was an emotional man, as Izzy very well knew, and still, he wanted him anyway. He should answer now, right? Yeah. Yeah. "Yes! Yes, I will!" He answers like, again, he didn't just propose minutes before this. "Oh, Izzy... oh, it's so beautiful." He praises as he slips the ring onto his pinky finger and suddenly he feels closer to his mother and even closer to Izzy if at all possible. "I can't believe that-- you're really going to--" Now it's his turn to have trouble speaking because he's so overwhelmed with emotion, but in the most beautiful way. "Can I kiss you now? Please." He asks, what with being told to wait, but he couldn't wait any longer. He needed to kiss him again after that. He needed to kiss his fiancé.

His fiancé.

HE WAS GOING TO MARRY ISRAEL HANDS!!

Well wasn’t that terribly interesting? Bonnet just confessed that the night he sang was when he started feeling things for him. Izzy had so many questions now that his head was spinning. He knew that after he killed Ned Low, that he and Ed had gone and had their first time. Was he thinking about him then? Was he really wanting to whisk Izzy away instead? After all even by that point the pair seemed to be spending more time together in total. .. and Izzy certainly wouldn’t have told him their first night was a mistake. Calypso, when he heard that happened Izzy wanted to kill Ed. It was such a cruel thing to say and way to act.

As his mind was spinning he suddenly heard those words. He’d been pulled into a kiss and then simply heard.. Marry me, Israel. He might have seemed hesitant to react at first, his mind still thinking about the thousand questions he wanted to ask. Stede certainly threw him off guard. He certainly hadn’t expected such a sudden proposal such as this. Had he planned that for this date? Certainly not, the way he said it was so off the cuff.

Fuck Izzy, say something. You’ve been quiet for minutes from the shock. Eyes lowered nervously as his face flushed bright red. Now it hit him. His blonde idiot had just proposed to him, a thought Izzy didn’t think would come in his long life. “ .. you want to marry me? “ He questions, as if he wasn’t sure he’d heard that right. Suddenly he’s now cupping Stede’s face as well, a smile starting to spread over gruff features as the thought only sunk in more. Someone truly did love him that much to want to be his partner and it made him feel something entirely new. He couldn’t describe it if he was made to, but it must have been what angelic and immortal beings felt like with happiness; unstoppable.

“ Of course I’ll marry you, Stede Bonnet.. “ Finally an answer! A shy little answer, but an answer! The smile grew, he laughed for no reason whatsoever except because there was so much joy swelling in his chest it simply spilled from his mouth. “ Oh I want nothing else of this dark and dreary world but to be by your side where it is light.. “

[sixstepsaway]

thinking about stede not finding ed for a pretty long time, maybe close to a year? ed's off doing stuff and he's healing because [waves hand around] izzy gets hurt because of his diability and ed realizes what he did and has a meltdown and works really hard to strike a balance between "safe by being a scary asshole" and "not actively hurting own crew and friends" and they're healing too, though it's slow, and meanwhile stede has been learning how to be a pretty damn good pirate actually, and he and his crew on a new ship have been pillaging the seven seas while looking for ed and co

and then stede finally finds him and it's...awkward? it's awkward. stede doesn't know how to explain what was going through his thick skull when he ran off back to his wife and ed doesn't know how to explain what he was thinking when he tried to kill seven of their mutual crew

(jim and frenchie are thrilled to be reunited at this time with the people they were separated from. in fact, i would say, that jim and oluwande have been exchanging letters or notes through spanish jackie this whole time, discussing whether they think stede and ed are ready to be reunited yet and getting more and more frustrated when the mutual answer is 'no' and that means they cant be reunited either, damnit)

so it's awkward, but over the next month or so they work through it and come to some ginger level of forgiveness for one another and neither of them makes any kind of move to be romantic because surely ed has moved on after what stede did, he doesn't want to have to go through this again, and stede was surely never interested in the first place, so ed isn't going to try anything okay? okay

and then word comes down from fellow pirates that some gang that stede fucked off have decided they want to kill bonnet, but stede can't be found anywhere and so they've decided they're going to go after his family! that'll work! they're going to go to barbados and go after mary, alma and louis

stede, of course, does not want anything to happen to his children or his widow, and ed hates the idea of stede running off to barbados again and so they set sail on the revenge to go to barbados (which is obviously a trap, but if they don't go anything could happen to the family, so they have to) and they come ashore and stede has to admit he's quite excited to introduce alma and louis to ed, but ed seems to have his reservations so he doesn't say anything aloud

and when they show up, mary is baffled he's back so soon but pleased now she knows he isn't here to ruin her life yet again, and immediately distressed when she hears of the plot against the family

and once stede has told her everything and has let her in on the plan they hatched to protect them, mary says, "And who's this?"

and stede immediately realizes he has fucked up, because there is no way in hell mary isn't going to know this is the ed

so he blusters a little before finally blurting, "This is the dreaded pirate captain, Blackbeard!"

and ed just eyeballs him like, "Mate, what the fuck?" and extends his hand to Mary. "He's not wrong, I am Blackbeard, but my friends call me Ed."

and mary's eyes widen and she exclaims, "Oh! Oh my god? You're Ed? The Ed? Stede's Ed? The Ed Stede is in love with?! Oh my god, I'm so happy to get to meet you!"

and as she rushes off to get doug - "Stede is here and he brought his Ed! Come and meet him!" - Ed looks at Stede

and stede studies the ceiling

"Stede's Ed, huh?"

"I suppose."

"The Ed Stede is in love with, huh?"

"...yes."

"Hm."

and ed goes into the house to meet doug with quite a spring in his step.

and idk what happens next re: the plot but that image was just too fucking funny so i had to share it

[obsidiancreates]

Our Museum Of Rot And Love (Part 7)

 Izzy In A Tizzy Thinkin' The Captains Are Gettin' Busy

Stede Bonnet should never be covered in blood. He shouldn't. Ed wants it to stop happening. He thought it was the worst when Stede was covered in his own blood. But no, no, everything that's happened... it's so much worse when it's the blood of others.

Because god, he hates how Stede just crumples when it's from others.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Are you sure about this?" Stede watches the forklift lower the crate. "I'm not really an authenticator."

Ed pats his back. "It's already been authenticated, man. Just needs sorting out and stuff. You're good at that."

"How would you know? I could be awful at it." He's not.

Ed looks him up and down. "Yeah, you could be, and I could be a fuckin' ballerina."

"You could be, for all I know."

Ed raises an eyebrow, and pats his knee. Stede looks down and notices, for the first time, a knee brace. His eyes widen. "Oh, um, I didn't- is that ah, an old injury or- no, shouldn't be asking, dammit Stede-"

"I'm fuckin' joking around man, it's fine," Ed says with a smile. "I actually did get this from dancing, kind of, but not ballet. Would be fuckin' cool though if I did, their legs are strong as fuck."

"Ah, like pole dancers."

"You go to clubs?"

"No, no. Sometimes the University staff parties get wild, is all."

"Wild enough for pole dancers?"

"Professor Nolands had to pay for her own tuition somehow. I really admire her dedication to education, in fact she helped with creating our improved tuition program! Over ten years later and she's still drawing on her experiences, just proves to us how important utlizing our pasts are!"

Ed looks away, and Stede gets the feelings he's said something wrong. But before he can ask what it was, Ed whistles. "Ten years and she can still do it? Fuckin' impressive shit, man, tell her she might be my hero. HEY SWEDE! WHAT'S THE HOLDUP WITH THE FORKLIFT, MAN?"

"The buttons are revolting against me!" The Swede slams his fist against the panel, and then shouts. He yanks his hand out of what clearly was a lever that jerked down and snapped shut on it. "Why do Buttons always try to eat me?!"

"Oh, let me help."

"Nah Stede, we've got this."

"I can! I took a couple mechanical engineering classes back in my day, just for fun! Oh, good god, man! Your hand!" Stede leans back out of the forklift, which he'd started climbing into. "It's bleeding!"

"Nothing serious though." His whole hand is red and wet, as the pressure of the snap open

"Just because you work in a pirate museum doesn't mean you should live like one! Oh, god- can you even get out of this safely?"

"Um." The Swede tries, and nearly slips right out on a puddle of the blood. Stede catches him. "Thank you Ca- um, sir."

"Stede is fine. Alright, let's help you down!" He helps Swede the rest of the way out, and then looks at himself. "Oh, damn. This was my favorite white knit too. Ed, do you have a washer or sink he- Ed?"

Stricken is the first word that goes through Stede's mind when he turns to Ed. He's ashy-faced, eyes wide and cloudy as he stares at Stede's stained sweater. Stede looks down again. It's a lot, yes, but most of the blood is on his hands, easy to wash off.

Then again, it might not be the horror of the ruined wool making Ed so... distressed.

"Well, um, I'm going to help Swede so he doesn't bleed out," Stede says, "And find any spare clothes I might change into so I don't scare anyone else. ... Is that okay, Ed?"

"Huh?"

"He'll be fine," The Swede assures, string at Stede in a... similar fashion, honestly, but more... aware. "We just don't like blood."

"Ah, he did mention that. I'm so sorry Ed, completely forgot, I'll be right back."

Ed watches him go, but Stede's uncertain of what Ed actually sees.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Swede goes to Roach, for some reason, and Stede learns Roach is essentially their First Aid. He can do rough stitches, superglue wounds, an has antiseptic cream.

"Ah, not to question your skills here, but... doesn't this need a bit more? Like a blood transfusion, maybe?"

Roach, who resolutely refuses to look at him, shakes his head. "He'll be fine, we've seen worse. I once saw someone cut off his own finger and survive."

"Oh good lord, what the hell lead to that?!"

"Buttons bit him because he got startled." Roach laughs fondly. "Ah, the crazy old bastard really loves his teeth."

"... The Buttons who works here? With the seagull?"

"That's the one."

Stede blows out a breath. "Well, that explains Ed's reaction. What a horrible thing to watch happen."

"Oh, we didn't even know it was real at first. It was during a Fuckery."

"Fuckery?"

"Like ah..." Roach thinks for a minute. "Like a play, but, to scare."

"Ooooh, theatre of fear! I myself have directed a production or two."

"Of course you have."

"Oh, I give off director vibes?" He can't help the little bit of pride that comes with the idea.

"Theatre vibes. Now, what about you? Are you hurt too, or did you avoid it again?"

Again? Has he gotten hurt here before? Well, there was the choking when he first met Ed, but that wasn't exactly avoided injury. Hmm. "No, I'm alright. Ed, though, may need a check-in. And ah, I might need a new shirt."

"Captain has some in his cabin."

"So... that's his office, then."

"Yeah. Okay, now Swede, the best part of recovery. Pain meds." Roach pulls out a bottle of rum. Stede's pretty sure Roach's medical education comes from less of a John Hopkins and more of a Hard Knocks. And also he might be liable for if The Swede dies of this if it gets infection now, as a witness. He may need to check with Frenchie about that.

Seems like a good time to get the clothes.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Purple crop tops aren't quite Stede's thing, and yet... here he is. He grabs an extra leather jacket as well, a little self-conscious. It's an interesting look, the jacket and shirt paired with his corduroy slacks and brown leather wingtip dress shoes.

... He kind of likes it, he won't lie. Clashing, yet dashing! Oh, he'll have to add that one to the list!

Going back out onto the museum floor, he somehow finds himself in the weapons display. A shorter bald man spots him and runs right up. "Is this happening? Lucius bet on way longer but I told him, no way."

"Wh-what? Is wh-"

"Um, you're wearing Ed's clothes?"

"What does that- oh! Ah, shit, no, this- I got blood on my onw- do you work here, actually?"

The man's shoulders slump, and he rolls his eyes. "Why does he have to be right about everything? I mean, it's adorable, obviously, but U'd like to be right like... once. I'm Pete, Lucius boyfriend. I'm um, sure he's mentioned me."

"Well, nice to meet you. Is... everyone, going to assume Ed and I are... ahem?"

"I mean, probably not. Lucius and I just like to bet on that kind of thing."

"... Huh. Does that ah... mean Ed is looking, then?"

Before Pete can reply, though, someone shoves Stede into the display. No, not shoves, pins.

"Told you it wasn't over, pissrat," the man from the crowd spits.

"Oh, fuck no, Jizzy, get out!" Pete grabs a dagger from the display and points it at the man. Stede shouts, and several people turn to stare!

"I paid admission," the man growls.

"You're banned from here, asshole! If Captain sees you he'll-"

"What, call the cops? Is he kissing the law's arse again for some stupid fuckin' ponce-"

"That's a slur!" Stede blurts out.

"And you're a stain you fuckin'-"

And suddenly the hands are ripped away. Ed has one hand on this "Jizzy's" shoulder, the other at his hip like it's second nature. "I thought you'd be smarter than this, Izzy."

The man smiles. "Oh, so you think about me, huh?"

"Get the fuck out of here, before I make you."

"How long has it been since you met him? Huh? How long did you wait this time, Edward."

"I'm not your business anymore, Izzy."

"You're always my business, Ed."

And very suddenly, it clicks into place for Stede. The staff knowing this Izzy, Ed knowing him, the rage, the instant assessment of threat, and Pete's initial thoughts-

This is Ed's ex, and clearly, not one of the stable ones you can part amicably with.

"Security!"

As Izzy is lead out, spitting and cursing, Ed turns to Stede. "Did he hurt you?"

"Just startled," Stede breathes, still staring wide-eyed after the guards. "Quite a dramatic day it's been. That's actually the man who shoved me when I was coming in earlier."

"Fucking dickhead," Ed mutters, gesturing to Pete to put the dagger back on the display. "Sorry about him, he won't be coming back here, I promise that."

"I'm sorry too. I think he made some um, assumptions, because of..." Stede gestures to his torso. "I should have just gone to the lost-and-found, if you have one."

"No, no man, it's fine. Those suit you, actually."

"Oh... don't be ridiculous." Now he's blushing, he knows it, so he lows down like he's examining the clothes. "It's not my style at all."

"No, really. You look great." When Stede looks back up, it's right into Ed's eyes. So much for the blush being hidden, he must be red as his sweater was. "Izzy's just an asshole, man, and he doesn't know how to let fuckin' stuff go. You just wore some fuckin' clothes, he turned it into a whole thing."

"Still, I hope it didn't put you in an awkward position."

"I'd rather know he's in town and have him banned then have him slinking around without me knowing. How about I walk you out to the road in case he's still here when you try to get a cab?"

"I'd like that." Stede smiles softly.

"Me too," Ed says with a smile back. "So uh, anything else you wanted to see?"

"Well, I haven't visited the section with the pirate personal stories yet."

"Really? Fuck man, Olu must be dying to meet you then. Come on." And he links his arm with Stede's.

Oh, yeah. No way Ed doesn't notice the blushing.

He also doesn't seem to mind.

Does that mean he's looking?

Maybe Stede has his answer after all...

[ourflagmeansparty]

Prompt Five: Survival By: @rawhiti (Team Red)

Stede was unspeakably glad that the first time Ed would be meeting his parents was at one of their elaborate parties. His parents would be busy enough hosting and chatting to all the terribly important people they needed to impress, which gave them less time to interrogate Ed; and they could run away from the situation far easier, too. Not that Stede was planning on it, but… well. He didn’t think any of his new friends really understood the survival tactics involved in these sorts of interactions.

He barely understood them himself, even after 19 years of practice. One of the best things about leaving home for university had been the unexpectedly relaxed nature of conversations. None of the stress about saying the right things or looking perfectly put together when half of the people in your hall didn’t get out of their pyjamas until noon.

Gods, he hoped that the outfit he’d chosen for Ed was alright. Picking out clothes for someone else had been a novel experience and a fun one too, until Stede had remembered that if Ed’s look was so much as a few months out of season, it’d be all his own fault.

“You alright there, mate?” Ed asked, his voice pulling Stede out of his anxious spiral and back to the taxi they were both sitting in. “We’re almost there, I think, but if you wanna just sit for a little longer we could get out early and walk the rest of the way.” Stede smiled at him, his beautiful, kind boyfriend who had no idea how vicious the well-dressed people he was meeting could be.

“Nah, we’d better not,” he replied, even though he dearly wished to just walk together instead of going to this party at all. “It’s a bit windy, and we wouldn’t want to mess up your hair, would we?”

“Suppose so. If you’re sure. You just look a little…” Ed trailed off with a shrug.

Stede nodded in agreement. “Well. It’s been a while since I’ve seen these people, and I certainly don’t miss most of them. But it’ll be fine. We’ll be fine.” He’d given Ed all the warnings necessary for his survival, about which people to talk to at what time and about which topics. Don’t bring up their university with his grandmother, or sports with his brother, or (most importantly) politics with anyone. “Oh, Ed, did I mention that aunt Gwendoline –”

“Shouldn’t be approached until the end of the night, I know, love,” Ed said. “You know I can stand up for myself, right? Got a sharp tongue of my own.”

“You’ve got nothing compared to Gwen, trust me. She needs quite a few drinks to be bearable, though at least she’s enough of a lightweight that it shouldn’t take too long for her to get rather drunk.” Besides, Stede was (maybe a bit selfishly) more afraid of how she’d be picking him apart, not Ed. He didn’t need his boyfriend to be presented with an itemised list of his flaws as an explanation for just how much better he was than Stede, thank you very much.

The taxi pulled off down the driveway. Ed’s eyes widened as he stared out at the estate and Stede tried not to cringe. They might complain about their tiny flat constantly, but places like this were simply excessively big.

Ed reached for the door as soon as the car stopped, but Stede grabbed his hand. “Wait, wait, just… look. I know you’ve said you’ll be alright but, honestly, I don’t think you quite understand what we’re getting into here. So if you want to leave, just say the word. I’ll be right beside you the entire time, okay? I’ve got your back.”

“Thanks, love,” Ed grinned. “But come on, you know I love a challenge. Into the lions’ den, then?”

Stede took a deep breath, nodded. “Let’s go.”

[omoghouls]

What if Ed wets the bed in his sleep while Stede was awake and lying next to him… Stede reading a book or just spending a moment looking at his love and then he notices a wet warmth spreading under the covers ;n; Would he try and change the bed sheets and Ed’s pants and clean him up doing his best not to wake him? Or would he stay there so he can be right there when Ed wakes up and comfort him when he realizes he had an accident? Or would he even try and take the blame to spare Ed’s feelings?

Omggg ;×; poor Ed!💔

Like, maybe it's morning, one where they don't have to be up immediately so, Stede doesn't try to wake Ed (who definitely is NOT a morning person as is xD So, Stede is happy to let his boyfriend sleep while he takes this restful time to continue a book he had been reading and ofc look over to Ed with pure adoration)

But, his brow raises a bit when he a certain warmth, one that surely isn't coming from the morning's heat- he looks to Ed and slowly pulls the sheet up and his eyes widen as he's watching Ed actively wetting the bed. It's a surprise to say the least to the gentleman pirate-

Stede doesn't want to jostle the poor man yet, he doesn't want to be the one to wake up Ed to this- he'd feel a type of guilt if he did so ;0; For a moment Stede thinks of somehow having Ed think it was him who did this instead of Ed but, moving Ed so he's on the dry side doesn't seem like something he could do without waking up Ed xD

So, Stede sorta just getts up and have some dry sheets and such ready then returns and waits- at least until he's sure that Ed is finished. Then he very cautiously rubs Ed's shoulder, softly speaking to Ed as he stirs.

Ed blinks, groggily rubbing at his eyes a small noise in his throat.

"I know, you deserve to sleep in, love. But," Stede pauses for a moment, trying to figure out the best way to say it, "well, you had a bit of an,,incident."

Ed's nose scrunches up a bit confused until his barrings finally come to him and he throws the sheets off and see the soaked beeding beneath him.

"Fuck," Ed quietly says.

Stede can see Ed's eyes growing a bit glassy, he leans over to Ed, "It's okay, perhaps a bit too much to drink last night? Or a bad dream? Either way, it's okay, beddings can be changed," Stede reassures.

Ed sorta, picks at the dry part of the sheets, mumbling apologies for this, saying that he didn't do this purposefully.

Stede kisses Ed's forehead, "I know dear, accidents happen, yeah? You must be getting cold, I have the tub ready if you want to take a bath, sound good?"

Ed just nods as Stede smiles warmly, helping Ed out of the bed- probably having Ed shead the sodden clothing there (so he doesn't dribble to the washroom). Stede cleans up the bedding, placing the wet sheets to the side and lets the mattress dry after he's put some ye old urine cleaner on it.

Then, Stede knocks on the ajar door and pops his head into the washing room and sees Ed with his knee against his chest while he sits in the water.

Stede pulls the small stool over and sits besides the tub, placing his hand on Ed's shoulder. A nonverbal expression that Ed knows is Stede telling him that he's there for him. And Ed leans into the touch, hearing Stede hums as he pulls out a wash cloth and that wonderful lavender soap Ed has come to find comfort in♡

"Thanks, mate," Ed says, a bit of an awkward fumble.

"It is not a problem at all, Ed," Stede says as he rings the cloth out, "It's what one does for those they love, now, turn just a small bit so i can get your back?"

And Ed does has he's told, a soft, relaxed sigh from being cared for in such a vaunderable time♡♡♡

[edactually]

Stede POV - 11.7

Stede didn’t have long until Ed arrived and he was panicking. 

He’d picked up the photo album yesterday, but flipping through the pages now just made him feel silly. God, what had he been thinking? This was far too much. They hadn’t even been dating a week and Stede wanted to give this to Ed as a gift?

Stupid idea.

He snapped the album closed and shoved it into the drawer of his bedside table. He could think of another gift for Ed. A better one.

He chickened out of the apron idea as well, opting for a soft cotton shirt and trousers, and made his way downstairs to start preparing breakfast.

It was as he was whisking the batter that he wondered if Ed would grow tired of blueberry pancakes. Stede knew Ed liked them so it had seemed like a good idea to make them, but now he was wondering if the novelty had worn off. Maybe Ed liked blueberry pancakes, but he didn’t want to eat them all the time. Maybe he would get bored of them if he wasn’t bored already. Maybe he wanted to try more interesting breakfast food like waffles or poached eggs.

Stede hadn’t asked Ed if he was exclusive to blueberry pancakes. He’d just made assumptions again. Probably best to ask him when he got here, just to make sure they were on the same page about breakfast foods.

Pull yourself together, Bonnet.

He whisked the batter harder, trying to blot out those troublesome thoughts creeping in again, and half of the contents of the bowl sloshed over the side and onto his shirt and trousers.

Fuck’s sake. Maybe the apron was a practical idea after all.

He tossed the shirt and trousers into the laundry hamper in the utility room. He didn’t have time to plan another outfit and make breakfast, and he didn’t want to just throw on anything. Ed had asked to see him in nothing but the apron, and it would make clean up easier if he spilled pancake batter everywhere again.

Before he could talk himself out of it, Stede plucked the apron hanging on the back of the door from its hook. He only ever bothered with it when he was cooking something particularly messy. The apron itself wasn’t fancy, just a navy and white striped number, but it was all he had.

As he knotted the string around his waist, Stede did wonder if he should have gone out and bought a new one, as this one did have a grease stain on the front pocket from when some butter had gone rogue, and he’d never managed to get it out. Hopefully Ed wouldn’t notice.

He didn’t feel particularly sexy as he went back to preparing breakfast, but he put that down to insecurity and being stuck in his own head. He was getting better at recognising the signs, although shutting that negative part of his brain off still proved to be a challenge. At least cooking was enough of a distraction that he didn’t have to think too hard about the fact that he was cooking naked except for the apron over his front. If he focused on quantities of flour and milk and eggs then he didn’t have the opportunity to start thinking he looked ridiculous and worry that Ed would just laugh at him when he came in.

He was just about to pour the batter into the pan when the sound of a car door slamming made his ears prick up. He set the bowl down and listened carefully.

There was a scraping sound, and footsteps, and then the unmistakable sound of a key being fitted into his front door.

Stede broke into a grin that made his cheeks start to ache from how widely it stretched over his face as he heard the door open and a heavy thud that must have been Ed dropping his bags to the floor.

Footsteps sounded and Stede was halfway to charging out of the kitchen to meet Ed when the door swung open.

And there he was.

Stede suspected Ed had lied about sleeping on the plane because he looked exhausted (although Stede doubted he looked much better after his own restless night), but those sleepy brown eyes widened at the sight of him. In his excitement that Ed was here, Stede had forgotten how he currently looked and now he turned bashful, smoothing out invisible wrinkles on his apron just for something to do with his hands.

This had been Ed’s suggestion, but now Stede was acutely aware that his boyfriend wasn’t saying anything and he questioned if it really had just been a joke and Stede had unintentionally made himself the punchline.

Stede wanted to look at the floor, but instead he watched Ed’s gaze travel slowly over him. Ed started with his face and swept down over his shoulders, his stomach (thankfully concealed by the apron), his calves, right down to his feet. Stede felt like he was under inspection and remained still, not even wanting to breathe too heavily in case it distracted Ed from his assessment. 

Then Ed’s eyes swept back up and made contact with Stede’s own, and it was only then that he understood Ed’s expression. 

“Oh my god.” Ed spoke at last, and his voice licked along Stede’s skin like fire. It was both husky and honeyed and filled with all the longing that mirrored how Stede felt. “Come here.”

There was no force in the world that could have held Stede back.

He lunged for Ed, only saved from tripping over his own feet by Ed catching him around the waist and pulling him in close. Ok, so apparently clumsiness and gravity were both forces with potential to hold Stede back, but it didn't matter. He was in Ed’s arms, crushed against Ed’s chest, and nothing else mattered.

They just held each other for a moment, too overcome with their reunion to do anything but just grip on tightly and hope that this was reality. They had only been apart for a couple of days, it was embarrassing really, but if Ed didn’t care about being clingy then neither did Stede.

And then Ed’s hands were sliding up his back and twisting through his curls and the gentle, simmering warmth between them turned into blazing fire. Stede couldn’t have said who moved first, just that their mouths collided, hot and burning and desperate. Stede could still count the number of times he and Ed had kissed, and if he had his way then there would ultimately be so many occurrences that Stede would lose track entirely.

Ed’s knees knocked against his as he started to back Stede further into the kitchen, and for a brief moment Stede worried that Ed might be in pain with his knee from the flight, but it was difficult to ask the question when Ed’s kisses stole any words from his mouth.

He felt cold metal pressing against his back, and the chill on his bare backside was enough to make him yelp in shock. Ed pulled back with an inquisitive look and Stede giggled. “The fridge. It’s cold.”

Ed’s eyes darkened as his hands slipped from Stede’s head and down his back. “Yeah? I can warm you up.” Strong, calloused hands suddenly grabbed his backside and Stede gasped. Ed’s hands were certainly warmer than the cold metal of the fridge that had pressed against him moments ago. Ed chuckled and dropped his head to Stede’s shoulder to kiss and suck at his skin while his hands squeezed and massaged the flesh of Stede’s arse like he was kneading bread dough. “I can’t believe you actually did this.”

“You asked me to.” Stede sighed happily and angled his neck so Ed could trail kisses there too.

Ed’s laugh reverberated over Stede’s skin. “And if I’d asked you to wrap yourself up in a bow and lie naked by your front door until I got here, you’d have done that as well, would you?”

“Yes.” Stede said simply, but perhaps it was the wrong answer to give because Ed stopped kissing him.

Their eyes met at the same time and Ed looked a strange combination of concerned and aroused. “They’re just ideas, Stede. You don’t have to do anything just because I ask you to.”

“I know I don’t.” Stede said. “And I admit, the apron thing is a bit out of my comfort zone but that’s why I decided to do it. I want to push myself, I want to try new things, I want–” He hesitated, not sure if he should admit the next thing on his mind, but Ed’s face was soft and smiling and Stede didn’t want to keep things from him. “I want to try and see myself the way I think you see me.”

Ed planted a tender and chaste kiss on Stede’s forehead. “And how do I see you?”

Stede blushed. “You know what I mean.”

“I do, but I want to hear you say it because I don’t think you’ll start believing it until you do.” Ed cocked his head, still smiling. 

Stede flushed an even deeper shade of red, but opted to try his best. “I think you see me as someone attractive?” He began, and Ed nodded. “You think I’m handsome?”

“Agreed, but these should be statements, not questions.”

It was difficult to keep the upwards inflection out of his tone. “You think I’m funny. You think I’m interesting. You think I’m exciting.”

Stede bit his lip nervously and couldn’t continue and Ed kissed the tip of his nose. “All true, and plenty more that I can think of but we’ll leave it there. You made a great start, Stede, I’m proud of you.”

He tried not to squirm happily at the praise, instead he just tilted his chin up in the hopes of another kiss. But just as Ed was starting to lean in, a loud rumble caught their attention and they both dissolved into laughter at Ed’s stomach making its presence known. “Breakfast time, I think.” Stede giggled and patted Ed’s shoulder to get him to release his hold and take a step back.

As he walked back over to the stove to finish the pancakes, he heard a loud groan from behind him and looked back over his shoulder. Ed was staring. “How the fuck am I supposed to concentrate on eating with that cute little arse of yours on display?”

Ed’s stomach rumbled loudly again and Stede turned his attention back to his cooking with a laugh. “I think you’ll manage.”

He had just poured the batter into the pan when he felt a presence looming behind him and then Ed’s hand slapped his ass. Not with enough force to hurt, but definitely enough to get his attention. Stede smirked. “You shouldn’t distract me when I’m making you breakfast.”

“I’m just wondering if I can get these cheeks as pink as your face when you blush.” Ed remarked, and Stede’s face heated in response. “Yep, just like that.”

Ed’s flat palm remained resting on his ass and Stede found it difficult to concentrate. His normally perfectly round pancakes were turning into a misshapen blob in the pan and Stede huffed. “You’ll ruin your breakfast if you carry on.”

Ed’s hand ran over the curve of Stede’s backside. “I can live with that. Unless you want me to stop?”

Stede was feeling far more devious than usual now he had Ed back and he rocked back against Ed’s palm, delighting in the surprised little expulsion of air he felt on his neck from Ed’s sudden gasp. “Actually, I want it harder than that.”

While Ed was stunned into silence, Stede flipped a pancake. It was misshapen, but a perfect golden brown, and he tipped it onto the waiting plate on the counter. “You should eat first though, darling. Your food will get cold.”

Ed waited until Stede had poured more batter into the pan to create the next pancake before slapping his ass again, this time with enough force to make Stede jolt and suck in a breath through his teeth. Ed’s palm stroked over the sting and once he’d had a moment to recover, Stede pretended to be nonchalant about it. “Hmm, thought I felt something. Probably just a bee sting.”

“Fuckin’ bee sting.” Stede felt Ed’s beard tickling the back of his neck as Ed leaned in closer. “I could turn your arse cherry-red and make it so you’re not able to sit down without thinking about me.”

A thrill ran up Stede’s spine at the threat. Then again, not much of a threat if he wanted it. “I’m not stopping you.”

Ed paused and Stede felt his head shift to look over Stede’s shoulder. “How long will it take to finish making breakfast?”

Stede turned the pancake onto the plate and poured batter in to start another. “Depends on how hungry you are.”

“Ravenous.” Ed said, and Stede sensed he wasn’t talking about food. “Let’s say one more of those for me and then however many you want. How long?”

Stede shrugged. “Five minutes, give or take?”

“Right then,” Ed’s hand roamed over Stede’s ass again and landed another sharp slap that made him yelp. “Let’s see how red I can get your arse by the time you’ve finished making breakfast.”

Was there a way of nodding one’s head so vigorously without looking like a bobblehead figurine? Stede should have been embarrassed by how eager he was, but he was just thrilled at the thought of what was to come. And trying to cook at the same time would be an extra challenge, even if it was just pancakes, which were hardly difficult.

Ed at least had the courtesy not to spank him when he was pouring batter or flipping a completed pancake onto a plate, just for the mess it might cause, but everything in between was fair game.

Stede braced himself for the slap on his right cheek where Ed’s hand was lovingly caressing his (surely pink by now) skin, but the next contact he felt was Ed’s hand spanking him hard on the left cheek, which had been woefully ignored thus far. Stede jolted and braced one hand on the counter for support. It was taking so much concentrated effort to keep cooking and not just bend over to let Ed treat him as he liked.

Another slap landed on his ass, in the exact same spot that Ed had already hit and it made him yelp at the sting of the strike. Ed caressed the spot he’d just spanked, stroking tenderly over Stede’s bare flesh and he realised that Ed was waiting for him to use their safe word since he’d cried out. He had no intention of doing so. Instead, he wriggled his hips in encouragement as he turned another pancake out onto a plate and began making a new one. The food would be fucking ice cold by the time he was done, but Stede doubted either one of them cared.

Ed built up a steady rhythm as Stede cooked, alternating between which ass cheek he landed a blow on. The intensity varied as well - sometimes it was light and nothing more than a little stinging tap against his backside, other times Ed spanked his ass hard enough that the sound of the slap echoed throughout the kitchen and was swiftly followed by Stede crying out. It was never painful enough that he wanted it to stop, but after every loud cry, Ed rubbed at the spot he had just struck to soothe and give Stede a chance to use their safe word before he attempted another slap.

By the time Stede had their breakfast dished out onto two plates, his backside was sore and stinging and he fucking loved it. It was like he could still feel every swat of Ed’s palm against his skin as they carried their plates over to the kitchen island. He couldn’t see the state Ed had left him in, but he could certainly feel it and Stede imagined his ass was as red as a rose and littered with Ed’s handprints.

Ed sat down first, but rather than tuck in to his (now cold) breakfast, he propped an elbow onto the countertop and rested his chin on his hand. He watched Stede with an amused smirk as he hovered, and then eventually took a careful seat on the stool next to him. Even though he was gentle with it, Stede did wince slightly as he sat and Ed laughed. “Told you so.” Ed leaned in to press a kiss to Stede’s bare shoulder. “I wasn’t too rough on you, was I?”

Stede added getting spanked by his boyfriend to his mental list of approved activities. “I enjoyed it. Perhaps I’ll repay the favour for you one day.” He started cutting his pancakes into bite-sized pieces. “If you’d be interested, that is.” Ed didn’t answer straight away and Stede risked a glance over to see that his boyfriend was staring at him in apparent shock. “What?”

Ed shook his head, as if he needed to shake loose his disbelief. “Just can’t believe you’re fucking real sometimes.” And before Stede could question if he meant that in a good or a bad way, Ed leaned in to capture his lips in a sweet kiss.

Stede felt a little kiss-drunk when they parted and he very nearly blurted out something he knew would be too much, too soon and he’d immediately regret it, but he bit his tongue when he realised he’s forgotten a key part of their morning routine. “Damn! I forgot to make the coffee.”

As he went to stand up, Ed shoved him down by his shoulders. “I’ve got it, angel, don’t worry.”

Stede’s head was still swirling from the pet name as Ed got up and started pottering around the kitchen to make the coffees. Everything was laid out already, it was just a matter of getting the water boiling and poured over the coffee he’d ground directly from the beans that morning. “You know they have fancy-ass machines that do all this for you now.” Ed remarked as he spied the manual coffee grinder Stede had left in his sink to be washed later. “Just a flick of a switch.”

“I know, but they’re so expensive.” Stede lamented. “I have the means, but it just seems like an awful lot of money to spend on something so frivolous when I can make it myself.”

“It’s not frivolous if you enjoy it.” Ed grinned and rested his hip against the counter as he waited for the water to boil.

“My father would disagree.” Stede laughed, but Ed didn’t. Ed remained silent. It would have been nerve-wracking were it not for those gentle brown eyes encouraging him to elaborate but not demanding it. “I wasn’t so careful with money a few years ago, you see. My father gave me a top job at his company so my salary was excellent, but I felt so out of my depth and lonely that I just turned to shopping to make myself feel better.”

Ed didn’t interrupt to voice his own opinion on that, just nodded, and Stede kept going.

“It became a bit of a problem. What started as buying a little treat for myself to feel better evolved into me spending more and more on lavish and frivolous things just because I wanted them.” He saw the worried crease on Ed’s brow and quickly intervened. “Oh, don’t get me wrong! It never got so bad that I spiralled into debt or struggled with money, but it certainly wasn’t appropriate behaviour.”

Those had been his father’s exact words when he’d dragged Stede to one side at a family dinner to chastise him for the floral velvet embroidered blazer he was wearing, and then had learned how much it had cost.

“My father worked himself up from nothing, you see.” Stede explained, the familiar speech that he’d been given since childhood easy to recite now. “One day everything he has will fall to me. Not because I’ve earned it, but because I lucked into it by being his only child. Once he saw how I was spending my money, he said I was irresponsible and foolish and if I didn’t tone it down then I would be out of a job, son or no son.” 

Stede shrugged. “It’s been easier since the divorce. My father has never visited me once since I’ve lived here, so it’s been easier to hide things from him. As long as I only wear my plain suits to the office and the unfortunate times when I do have to see my father socially, he doesn’t comment on it. Still, I suppose his words clung to me enough that I think twice before buying something expensive for myself now.”

The water had boiled and Ed turned his attention to making their coffees. Stede had caught the contemplative look upon his face and wondered if it bordered on pity. But he had potentially soured the mood by bringing up his father, and he didn’t want to make it worse. He tucked into his cold pancakes while Ed spooned the correct and ludicrous amounts of milk and sugar into his and Ed’s cups and then brought them over.

They ate together in quiet companionship, and it was like Ed had a sixth sense for whenever Stede was beginning to worry that he’d ruined the mood, because every now and then Ed would rest his hand on Stede’s knee or press a kiss to his cheek or stroke a wayward curl back from his forehead. Ed told Stede everything with such simple gestures.

I see you, I like you, I’m not going anywhere.

Stede finished his breakfast and coffee first, which was unusual for them. Ed had cleared his plate but was still sipping his coffee, watching Stede as he bustled around the kitchen and began the process of cleaning up.

“Can I ask you something?”

Stede was at the sink with his back to Ed when he heard the question, trying to scrub a particularly stubborn piece of batter from the pan. “Yes?”

“You’re not very sexually experienced.”

That wasn’t a question, but Stede bit his tongue and let Ed continue.

“Yet you’re so… I suppose adventurous is the best word? Or maybe curious? Like when you gave your first blowjob and asked me to come on your face, then you wanted to try sixty nineing, then you asked to eat me out. Not complaining about any of that, just to be clear.”

Stede was glad for that clarification, he’d been starting to wonder if Ed thought he was depraved.

“I think because you were so worried and nervous about your lack of experience, I just expected you to want to go slower and to build up to things like that, but you surprised me with just how ready and willing you are to try stuff. It’s like you’ve only just dipped your toes in the pool but you’re ready to jump into the deep end.”

Stede had managed to get the stubborn piece of batter off and set the pan on the draining board. “You said you had a question?”

“I suppose my question is… why?”

This would be easier to answer if he didn’t have to look at Ed, and Stede busied himself with the remainder of the dishes in the sink. “I’ve asked myself the same thing. That whole period of life where most people are out exploring and figuring out who they are, I spent just… doing what I was told.” Going to the college he was told to attend, marrying the girl he was told to want, taking the job that had been picked out for him.

“Finally coming out was the best thing I ever did, but also the most terrifying. Suddenly I was part of a world that I had no experience of, and it felt like I was too old to be a complete novice.” In the beginning, Stede had felt ostracised in a community he’d finally hoped to fit into. “It’s why the thought of kissing another man scared me so much, because I was convinced I’d get it wrong and be a laughing stock. But then after we kissed for the first time… everything just fell into place.”

He thought back on it now. The chill in the air, the way that late night breeze had nipped at his skin but Ed had been so warm. How Ed hadn’t hurried or pressured him and how easy it had been to just sink into that kiss, to really take his time and feel all of it. The fizzing in his stomach and the sparks in his veins and every cell of his body crying out that this was it, this was what it was supposed to feel like.

“It was so perfect, everything I’d ever dreamed it could be. Suddenly I started thinking about all the things I hadn’t done, all the experiences I’d missed out on. I wanted to try everything. Of course I was still nervous, which is why I didn’t act on those impulses straight away. I suppose I could have done, if I’d gone out on Grindr dates with other people, but that didn’t feel like what I wanted.”

Grindr would have been ideal for the exploration he wanted. It was somewhere he could be upfront with what he wanted to try and the people interested would let him know, and there would be no awkward preamble, no wondering how the other person felt - they would both know what they were there for, get on with it, then go their separate ways. Satisfying but impersonal.

It wasn’t what Stede had wanted. He was anxious enough as it was, so exploring a side of himself he’d never considered before wasn’t something he felt comfortable doing with a stranger. It had to be with someone he trusted.

“And then I realised it was because of you. Everything I wanted to try, to experience for the first time, it was only ever you that I pictured. And I don’t just mean the sexual experiences either. I’m talking about romantic dates and quiet domestic moments and– god, I was so absolutely gone on you, I wanted everything. Still do.”

It was madness really, how fast he’d managed to fall. He had quite literally fallen for Ed the first time he’d seen him.

“But I kept getting in my own head, talking myself in and out of stuff and giving you every mixed signal in the world - which I feel like a real bastard for doing, by the way - and then ultimately I realised that I just needed to fucking talk to you.” All the miscommunication, all the issues, all because Stede didn’t have the guts to just lay his cards on the table and ask for what he wanted. He didn’t feel like he deserved to get it, but clearly Ed disagreed as he was still here.

“You were there for the rest. And I can’t say that I don’t still get nervous, you know that I do, but I feel I can be more open with you than anyone else and you’re never going to laugh at me or judge me for it.”

It was why Ed was so perfect. The best friend, the best lover, the best listener. Just someone he could really be himself with, and know that it was enough for him. As much as Stede dearly loved his friends and family (perhaps not including his father in that family roundup), he knew he could be too much for them at times. For Ed, he wasn’t too much. For Ed, he always felt like enough.

Dishes stacked on the side to drain, Stede finally turned around with a sheepish smile after dumping so much information on Ed, who was probably unsuspecting of it. “I suppose that’s a very long-winded way of saying that I’m trying to make up for lost time and I was waiting for the right person.”

Ed was holding his cup between his hands and his brown eyes were filled with some emotion that Stede couldn’t name as he stared at him. He saw Ed’s throat bob as he swallowed, and then Ed was looking down at the counter, suddenly unable to meet Stede’s gaze.

Stede was curious, but not panicked (yet), and he came back to the kitchen island to sit next to his boyfriend. He prised one of Ed’s hands from his tight grip on his cup to hold it. Ed only met his eyes again when Stede kissed the back of his hand. “Something’s on your mind.”

Ed smiled, but it was small and didn’t meet his eyes, and was gone in moments. “Just got me thinking, that's all.”

“About what?” Stede kissed his hand again. “Tell me.”

Ed sighed deeply. “You want to make up for lost time. I get that and I’m more than happy to help. Believe me, I have very much enjoyed everything so far, so don’t think I’m an unwilling participant because I promise I’m into it.”

He stopped and Stede ran his thumb over the back of Ed’s hand. “But?” He prompted.

“But I’m worried that there are things I want for us that you’ll find…” Ed’s voice dropped and Stede had to strain to hear the next whispered word. “Boring.”

Stede was flabbergasted.

Boring? In what world would he ever find Ed boring?

He must have said as much without realising because Ed smiled again, although it was still not his usual grin. “Because I’ve done the wild stuff, and while there’s a lot of it that I enjoy and I enjoy it even more because it’s with you now, there’s… there’s stuff I want to try that I’ve never done and I’m worried you won’t think it’s exciting.”

“I would never.” Stede squeezed Ed’s hand. “What is it, my darling? Tell me what you want.”

“Well, besides the mundane things like just watching a movie together or doing chores together…” Stede was a little surprised that Ed actually wanted to do chores, but it made sense when he remembered Ed had never really had a committed relationship and all the so-called ‘boring’ stuff that came with it. “I– I want you to fuck me. But I want it slow. I want you to be gentle, I want to feel–”

“Cherished?” Stede suggested and Ed bit his lip as he nodded. Stede lifted a hand to Ed’s cheek and let his thumb stroke softly and reassuringly against it as Ed leaned into the touch. “Darling, I would never find that boring. All I want is to treasure you. You deserve to feel adored and I would love to be the one to do that for you.”

Ed’s head turned to press a kiss to Stede’s palm, and when he looked back, his eyes were lit up. “Really?”

“Everything with you is exciting, and I said I wanted it all. You’re going to tell me exactly what you want and I am going to do my absolute best to provide it for you.” Stede leaned forwards so that their foreheads rested against one another. They stayed that way for a moment, sharing deep, calming breaths, before Stede spoke. “Let’s go upstairs.”

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