#and doing my annual room rearrangement

[sassmill]

Today I’ll get my life together just you wait

[raya-hunter01]

WIP Wednesday (Even thought it's Saturday)

Thank you empressdede and @whatdoeseverybodywant for the tag. This has been sitting in my drafts since December. Enjoy!!

The Christmas Present

Jey's Annual Christmas Party

“There is nothing wrong with Sefa, take that back. Your being plan mean now,” I said offended as Tori one of the new divas was talking about him as he stood across the room totally unaware, or maybe he was, and he just didn’t give a shit what people thought of him.

He always moved in silence…Guarded and the halls always cleared when they saw him coming.

“Get real Eden, it has to be something wrong with him. He just stands there like a knot on a log and doesn’t say anything. I wonder does he show emotions when he has sex or is he like a robot,” she said as Trin interrupted her public undressing of the tribal heir.

“Ain’t nothing wrong with my brother-in-law, he just ain’t with the drama that ya’ll asses bring. Plus, he likes his women real, not surgically enhanced,” Trin said as I smiled at the offended look and Tori’s face before she stormed off.

“Damn tell her how you feel, Trin,” I laughed as she smiled.

“Girl, she mad because he won’t give her the time of day and he likes you,” Trin said winking at me as I shook my head at her before stealing a glance at the baby brother of the Fatu family.

I have to admit, I liked him too, but he was dangerous. They say the most dangerous man in the room is one that doesn’t know the power he has over others, and I don’t think he knows the power he truly has.

I was drawn to him, there was a sadness to him that just made me want to hold him.  

The chaos of the Christmas party long forgotten as I saw him talk to his brothers for a few minutes before going upstairs.

“When are you going to tell him, you like him?’ Trin asked as I sipped on my champagne. “I’m not ready to date yet, Trin,” I said as she scoffed.

“Bullshit It’s been over a year, you need to have some fun,” she said as her thoughts echoed in my mind.

My last relationship had me leery on letting someone into my life again. It’s not every day your boyfriend cheats on you with your cousin. I’m not scared to admit that it fucked me up, but I am slowly working through it.

“I’m going to tell him Merry Christmas, then order me an uber,” I said as she smirked at me.  “An uber? Girl, go upstairs and lay up under that man, stop playin’,” Trin said as I sighed.

“Uh, we are rarely home and I’m going to sleep in my own bed tonight, thank you very much. Plus, I’m sure Jey don’t want folks having sex in his house,” I said giving her a hug as she laughed.

“Aye, where my hug at?” Jey asked engulfing us both in his strong arms. “I really enjoyed the party boo, but I’m about to head out,” I said as he kissed my cheek.

“Head up and see lil bro before you leave. He’s in the spare bedroom, you know where it’s at,” he said as I gave him another hug before going upstairs. The music becoming fainter as I went to the other side of the house.

How do you tell someone you want them to rearrange your insides respectively without sounding desperate. Gently knocking on the door I leaned up against the frame, my hair flowing wild and free as I anxiously waited.

“Who is it?” He asked opening the door as I smiled trying to hide my nervousness. The shocked look on his face told me all I needed to know I made the right decision to come up to see him.

“Are you alone?” I asked as he nervously gulped but couldn’t resist being a smart ass. “Oh, I got a whole party going on in here, you don’t see all these people” he said smartly as I rolled my eyes “Always the smart ass,” I whispered as he cracked a smile.

 “It’s always just me, you know that,” he said as I built up my nerve.

 “Well, how would you like to have a real party for two?” I asked shyly as he opened the door wider allowing me inside as I put my coat on the dresser.

“I was just listening’ to some music on the tv to unwind,” he said clearing his throat going over to turn it off. “No, leave it on,” I whispered sitting down in the chair beside the bed as he turned it down a little and sat down on the bed.

“What happened you been avoiding me all night?” I asked truly wanting to know what was wrong. “I got some shit on my mind, I had to take the kids back to their mom and they didn’t want me to leave,” he said as I sympathized with him.

“I know it gets hard but it’s going to get better, I know it is. They know you love them and just keep making sure they know that.” Reaching over I rubbed his knee in support as he stoic expression never changed but he nodded.

“I just hate I won’t get to spend Christmas with them tomorrow, but I guess I should be thankful they got to open a few of their gifts from me tonight.”

 “Maybe you should call her and see could you stop in and just be there for when they open their other gifts tomorrow,” I suggested as he sighed pulling out his phone texting his ex-wife.  

I hoped she lets him do that, it’s bad enough she moved the kids back here to Pensacola without him knowing.

 I saw a small smile pass his face as he got a text alert. “She said I could come in the morning to see them open their gifts, and eat breakfast with them,” he said as I smiled brightly at him, truly happy for him.

“I’m glad she changed her mind, I can’t even imagine being without my baby on Christmas,” I said as he grabbed my hand, causing me to blush.

“Enough about me though, how is Kason?” he asked as I smiled brightly at the mention of my son’s name. “He’s great, my mom has him for tonight. She thought I needed the break.”

“You do, I mean your like superwoman. You make sure all our schedules are good and constantly taking care of us all. Then you’re a mom to a very busy ten-month-old. Hell, when we leave the building, your night is just getting started,” he said as I tried not to smile.

 He actually was taking notice and appreciative of my work and who I was as a person.

“Yea, it does but I’m just glad Joe talked them into getting me a bus so I can bring him on the road with me. I love how kid friendly the backstage atmosphere is now under Paul’s leadership.”

“Yea, he has that part down good. Now if only the gossip mill would stop wit they shit, maybe I could walk the halls and not be judged by people that don’t even know me,” his voice trailed off.

I knew he heard the whispers of our coworkers. They were afraid of him, they bought into the persona, but I knew better. He was shy and misunderstood but it was their loss and my gain.

“I wanna dance,” I said standing up and holding my hand out to him as his eyes seemed unsure. It was almost as if he wanted to look around to see if there was anyone else in the room with us.

“Uh, with me?” he asked as nodded, not trusting my voice. “It’s a lot that comes along with this and I know you ain’t ready,” Sefa whispered his eyes piercing my soul as I yearned for him.

“Stop worrying, I’m a big girl and I know what I want,” I said unashamed as he licked his lips. “Is that right? Well, tell me again what you want beautiful,” His deep voice awakening something within me that had been doormat for far too long.

“I want to dance with you…Right here…. Right now,” I declared as he stood up pulling me close, our foreheads touching as I caressed his face.

 His nervousness making me almost shy, but I knew if this was going to happen tonight, I needed to take charge. “Sefa, I don’t want to be alone tonight,” I whispered as his eyes found mine again.

Clearing his throat, I waited with bated breath for his answer. “I don’t wanna be alone tonight either,” he whispered nodding as I released the breath I was holding.

 “I was hoping you would say that,” I said, my fingers playing with his beard as he caressed my hips.

 Building up my courage, I tested the waters with a gentle kiss as a deep groan fell from his lips as we tasted each other.

Suddenly, Sefa pulled me closer, deepening our kiss making it even more impossible for me to gather my myself as he ravaged my mouth with his. My hands gripping the back of his shirt as I whimpered against his lips in pleasure.

His kisses, powerful and intentional as I weakened in his arms.

“Mm, Sefa”, I gasped as he released my lips. Shit, he can kiss, and he knew it by the sly smile that adorned his handsome face as we both caught our breaths.

  “You sure?” he asked as I nodded, his hands caressing my face as he claimed my lips again.

“Mmm, tell me you want me and that I ain’t trippin’ right now,” he whispered, his passionate gaze making me fall even deeper under his spell.

“Yes, I want you,” I moaned as his thumb caressed my lower lip. “You want my head between your thighs eatin' that sweet pussy don’t you?”

 His deep voice sending shivers down my spine as I purred in anticipation.

“Yes! Please Sefa,” I begged unashamed, yearning to be claimed as he licked his lips.

“You want all this dick up in dat pussy rearranging them tight walls don’t you?”

Fuck, he knew his power, and I was already under his spell, ready and willing as I whimpered against him unable to speak.

“Are you ready for all of me Eden, I can be a lot baby, but I promise you ain’t gon’ never forget me.”  

I nodded, rendered powerless as his lips slowly descended upon mine, our kisses becoming deeper and more desperate by the second.

“Yes, take me,” I gasped finally finding my voice as we fell onto the bed.  Our lips and hands exploring each other desperately. “You sure?” he whispered against my lips, as I nodded again.

 “Let me here you, Eden. Do you want me?” he groaned, grabbing my hands pinning them above my head as he towered over me .

 “I want you,” I moaned as a low growl fell from his lips. “I want you too,” he moaned claiming my lips again with urgency as I gasped at the intensity but welcomed it.  

I was losing myself, losing myself in him and I loved it.

Whimpering against his mouth, he abruptly released my lips and let my hands go. “Why did you stop?” I panted trying to catch my breath as he searched my face for discomfort.

 “I knew you weren’t ready for this; I’m moving too fast.  Your scared of me, aren’t you?” he asked as I looked at him in confusion.

“What are you talking about?” I asked not getting how he gathered that conclusion.

“Look, I can take it alright, just tell me your scared of me like everybody els is," he said as I sat up beside him still trying to catch my breath.

“Scared of you? Boy, if anything I needed to breathe so I wouldn’t die on your ass,” I said as he looked at me in confusion.

“I’m serious Sefa, whether you know it or not, your very intense and I like it. It actually makes it hard for me to not lose myself around you,” I confessed as he searched my eyes for any deception in my words.  

 “I’m not scared of you Sefa, if I was, I wouldn’t have come up her,” I said reaching over and placing my hand on his knee.

“You sure you’re not scared?  You would tell me, right?” he asked as I smiled at him.

“Now, if you would have asked me this last year, I would have said yes without a second thought. But, I know you now, and up under that tough enforcer attitude you’re a teddy bear,” I said getting up off the bed and going over to the table to fix me a shot of Tequilla.

“I couldn’t tell that you were scared, you chewed my ass out for not speaking to you the first time we ever talked,” he said as I laughed.

“Hell, its rude to not to say at least hello to someone when they speak to you.”

“A’ight you right, I was wrong,” he said as an idea popped into my head.

“Now, since we got that covered, how bout we get out of here and go to my house. I have a beautiful view of the beach and plenty of privacy,” I offered as he stood up slowly walking towards me.

“Going somewhere more private sounds perfect, I mean we don’t need everybody in our business,” he said as I nodded in agreement. Last thing any of us needed was the gossip mill in our business.

 “I’m happy we’re on the same page, let’s get out of here.”

It was easy to sneak away as the party was in full swing, but Sefa shot Jey a text to let him know he was taking me home and would hit him up later.

The ride to my house at first was quiet but something shifted in the atmosphere as leaned over and playfully nipped at his neck as he drove.

“You playin’ a dangerous game Eden,” he growled as I smiled against his neck slowly reaching down, slipping my hands inside his sweats as he groaned.

“Mmhm, a big dangerous game at that and I can’t wait to play,” I whispered in his ear, as I slowly began to stroke him.

 “Damn, you like playin’ with danger, don’t you?” he moaned as I smiled against his neck. His breathing became more ragged as his hands gripped the steering wheel.

 “Yes, now eyes on the road, I got you,” I whispered as he groaned in appreciation. “Mm, shit… Well, go on then and do your thang.”

 My mama ain’t raised no punk, so Sefa’s bout to get a preview of what’s to come. I just pray it don’t get us killed.

“Make the next right and go about two miles up the road, my house is the last one up on the hill,” I whispered in his ear as one of his hands caressed my thigh.

 “I’mma tear dat pussy up, you know dat right,” he moaned. His deep voice echoing throughout the car and making me even wetter than I already was as I continued to stroke him.

 “Yes, and I can’t wait,” I whispered as his grip on the wheel tightened. “Are we almost there?” he gasped as I smirked knowing he was close as I decided to talk him through it.

“You like my hands pleasing you, don’t you?” I asked as he nodded in concentration putting his other hand back on the wheel.

“Don’t hold back, I want you to let go,” I encouraged as he melted into me. “There is my house, turn in and park,” I said as he quickly pulled into my driveway, throwing the car in park and cutting it off.

"Now, keep your hands on the wheel,” I said as he turned, resting his forehead against mine, keeping his hands on the wheel as I continued to please him.

“Why did you come with me tonight?” I whispered, licking his lips as groaned catching my tongue between his lips as we shared a sloppy wet kiss.

 “Mmm, you know why. Tell me why you wanted me to come?” he moaned, trying to regain control of the situation.

“I wanted you to devour this pussy,” I whispered as he moaned against my lips.

“Now you tell me why you came? Tell me Sefa,” I whispered, beginning to stroke him faster as he gasped.

 “I wanted to have you all to myself and make you scream my fuckin’ name all night long,” he growled grasping my face and claiming my lips in a passionate kiss as he came.

His body trembling as he found his much-needed release. Looking handsome more than ever as he rode out his climax as I watched in awe.

Yea, he defiantly needed that, and I was happy to help.  

“Damn Eden, that was-” he moaned caressing my face, not able to finish his sentence, I smiled.

“It was my pleasure,” I whispered tenderly kissing his lips.

“Now, let me see if you taste as good as you look right now,” I said as he watched me through heavy lids.  

Slowly I leaned down, and licked his cum off of his stomach as he gasped in shock at my actions. Not leaving a single drop, I then slid back into my seat. “Let me see Eden, open up beautiful.” Staring innocently at him, I opened my mouth and released my tongue for him to see.

 “Fuck, dats what I’m talkin’ bout. Mmhm, now swallow dat shit,” he commanded as I did as he instructed.

“Mmm, you taste good,” I whispered licking my lips as he moaned. His powerful gaze awakening the woman within me.   

“You askin’ for trouble,” he hissed as I smirked, before exiting the car as he readjusted himself back into his sweats.

Anxiously, I went to unlock the front door, before turning around to see if Sefa was behind me, but he was still sitting in the car in a daze.

“Stop overthinking Sefa, it’s no rules here,” I said going inside and heading upstairs, dropping articles of clothing along the way as I made my way to my room.

 Hearing his footsteps, I sat down on the side of the bed, crossing my legs wearing only my black stilettos and a smile.

In all honesty I was scared to death, but excited if that made sense.

 My heart began to race as Sefa appeared in the doorway in all his naked glory. My pussy drippin’ and throbbing in anticipation, knowing at any moment he was going to completely engulf me within his flame, and I couldn’t wait.

“I see your waiting for me like a good girl,” he whispered as I smiled holding out my hand to him as he came closer.

“I see you’re ready again,” I whispered looking at his throbbing erection as he smirked.  “Oh, I stay ready and you betta be ready,” he said his voice making me wet as fuck as I moaned at his words.

“Come find out,” I whispered as he took my hand and smiled.  “Are you sure?” he asked once again kneeling before me as I smiled.

 “More than you’ll ever know,” I said as our lips met in another passionate kiss.

 “Merry Christmas, Sefa.”

 “Merry Christmas, Eden” he whispered easing me back onto the bed as I welcomed all of him.  His hands caressing my body as raked my nails down his back in pleasure as he nibbled and sucked on my breasts.

 “Let me see if you taste as good as I imagined,” he panted moving his kisses to my stomach as I gasped.  Fuck, with how this man kisses I know he can give some bomb ass head.

“Are you gon’ give it all to me like a good girl?” Sefa asked dipping his tongue into my belly button as I moaned, running my fingers through his hair.

“Yes! I’mma give it all to you,” I moaned staring down at him in anticipation as he wore a mischievous smirk as my body trembled.

“Well, let me open up my first Christmas present then,” he whispered as his head disappeared between my thighs.

@reci24 @southerngirl41 @vebner37 @jeyusos-girl

@melaninsugababy @romanreignkisser @bebesobrielo

@arination99 @2-muchsauce @bakugoumarianawrites

@empressdede @alyyaanna @christinabae @anonandwannakeepitthatway @venusesworld @jeyusosgirl  @theninthwonder @mya2real  @justazzi @whatdoeseverybodywant @reignsboy19 wooahmiri alichesmi pytbgeezy

[bouncybongfairy]

Sleep Away Camp

Stiles Stilinski x Fem Reader

Summary: Beacon Hills High School's annual science camp trip is coming up. Knowing Stiles is going you think this might be a good time to shoot your shot. He ends up saving you from the mimic that followed Scott and Stiles to the camp.

Word Count: 2.5k+

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The class dragged on as you watched the clock tick, almost mockingly. It was the day before the science camp trip. The students who chose to go would spend three nights and four days in the California wilderness. Everyone may have been buzzing about the trip for the past couple of weeks, but you were exhilarated. You had taken a day trip with your mom to purchase everything on the suggested list. It was all sitting at home, ready to go in the duffle bag that you had rearranged 3+ times. You were thinking about all possible scenarios of rebellion that were bound to take place. There were rumors about different friend groups planning on sneaking out into the woods and doing god knows what. 

The bell had rung and you were one of the first people to leave the room. You rushed home as fast as you could to get ready before heading back. All the students were supposed to meet in the school parking lot at 4 p.m. to load onto the buses. Your phone was going off like crazy, distracting you from washing your face and fixing your hair. It was peers posting on their stories, all of them were pretty much the same. Girls posting boomerangs of their cute luggage; boys posting stupid, half-serious jokes like: ‘Meet me in my tent for a good time tonight.’ Your face physically cringed when you saw posts like that. Did they think that was going to help them get girls? You noticed that Lyida had texted you, asking if she could give you a ride and if you’d sit on the bus with her. After texting her back agreeing to both you finished up getting ready. Right as you were about to take your stuff downstairs to wait for her, your mom came into your room. 

“Are you ready to go? I can drive you,” she said with her keys in hand. 

“Oh sorry I was about to tell you, Lydia is going to pick me up and drive down there together,” you said, now feeling slightly bad. 

“Are you sure?” she asked. 

“Yeah.. if you want I can text-” you started. 

“No no, it’s okay. I mostly came in here to tell you I love you and to please be safe,” she started, “it had a lot less anxiety the last time I sent you,” she finished, sitting on the bed. 

“How? I’d figure it would be scarier knowing I was younger going to sleep away camp,” you said.

“Well, you were only 11. I knew the teachers would be watching you and you couldn’t keep your eyes open past 11 p.m.,” she laughed before continuing, “I just want to remind you not to do anything you might… regret,” she sighed. 

“Mom, I'm not going to hook up with anyone or do anything stupid. I may be a teenager but I can control myself,” you said. 

She reassured her trust in you before helping you down the stairs with your bags. Lydia had texted you that she was about to be there. After giving your mom a hug and a quick kiss on the cheek, you loaded your things into Lyida’s car. She wasn’t as excited as you were but you could tell she was happy to spend time with Jackson. You, on the other hand, had your eye on Stiles. When you asked Lyida if it was okay if you pursued him, she laughed and was almost insulted that you asked. You liked Stiles ever since 6th grade and figured this weekend would be the best place to make your feelings known. She parked her car and you both walked over to the group of students that were gathered to enter the bus. Stiles and Scott were standing together talking while sharing a bag of chips. Allison and Issiac were standing next to them, She waved when she saw the two of you approach. Lydia and Allison immediately began talking with each other, same with Scott and Issiac. 

“Hey, are you excited for the trip?” he asked, wiping his face with his sleeve. 

“Yeah, I can’t wait to see the stars, it's way easier to see them from the forest,” you said. 

“Oh yeah? I heard we're gonna do a big campfire tonight with smoke and crap,” he said. 

“I’m a little nervous because of all the animal attacks lately. If it's is that bad in the city I'm sure it’s worse in the wilderness,” you said. 

“Oh well yeah, I mean I'm sure it won’t be that dangerous. If it was they probably wouldn’t be taking all of us up there right?” he said laughing awkwardly at the end.

“Yeah that’s true,” you said, realizing that the entire bus had already been loaded while you were talking. 

All the seats were taken, even Lidya was sitting next to Allison. Stiles and you ended up sitting next to each other. At first, you were nervous about sitting next to him for the entire ride. Seemed a little too confrontational, especially considering you were going to try and get with him by the end of the trip. However, as time went on, you realized you guys had a lot in common. You were both into sci fi-movies, you both were in the same computer coding class, and both had a rather impressive collection of legos. It felt like the ride flew by because of how engaged you were to each other. You apologized every time your thigh bumped into his and eventually, he scooted closer so that your outer thighs were pressed together. It was getting close to sunset which was making the clouds and sky look beautiful. You were looking out the window for a while, taking pictures of the view. Once the buses arrived, everyone filed out and waited to be directed to the tents. Lydia was complaining because she thought they were going to be cabins. All the tents were on this wooden platform that was about 4 feet from the ground. The ‘tents’ were a metal A-line structure that had a waterproof cover over it. There were these little cots inside, it was three to a tent. 

“Well isn’t this just great, we were camping in the woods and they gave us a literal fort made of sheets to sleep in,” Lidya said. 

“Come on, it’s not that bad. You could tell when we walked in that it was warmer than outside,” Allison said. 

“I think it’s kinda cozy,” you said which made Allison laugh. 

“Like you and Stiles on the bus?” Lydia asked. 

“Well yeah, you were supposed to sit with me. You could have told me that the line was moving,” you laughed. 

“Oh I know, I was doing both of us a favor. You got the chance to hang out with Stiles and Hopefully, he’ll leave me alone once he falls for you,” she said, shoving her suitcase under her cot. 

“You think he’ll fall for me?” you asked hopefully which caused both girls to laugh at such a stupid question. 

It was nightfall now and everyone was making their way to the campfire. It was huge, easily 7 by 7 feet with logs all around it for students to sit. You saw Scott and Stiles sitting on one of them, holding a place for all three of you. He smiled at you when you saw him which made you blush. The two of you went to grab more stuff for the group. Stiles kept catching his marshmallows on fire, incinerating them. You ended up making him four, he inhaled them as fast as you could make them. Eventually, Allison wandered off with Scott, and the same with Lyida and Jackson. You weren’t allowed to go off into the woods but the two of you didn’t go far. It was hard to talk to each other in a serious way when you could barely hear each other talk. Over the loud crackling of the fire and the sheer amount of students laughing and roughhousing. You were looking up at the stars, amazed that they could be so bright. You were pointing out different constellations and explaining how you learned some of them when you played The Last of Us. When you looked back at him, he was staring at you. 

“What?” you asked. 

“Uh- did you like the game?” he asked. 

“Oh, yeah I never really get emotional for the storylines of games but that one got me. Made me reflect on my character, especially because Ellie had no idea what life was like before the apocalypse. So materialistic, oh my god when I replied to it and saw how Joel and his daughter lived before everything my jaw dropped. It was so weird to see them ‘normal’ again you know?” you finished.

“Yeah I get that feeling of you know, -sigh- not cherishing what you have until it’s gone,” he said. 

“Sorry I didn’t mean-” you started. 

“No, don't even worry about it. I’m glad we could spend time together alone like this. These days I feel like I’m surviving more than living,” he said. 

“Me too,” you said smiling. 

After you both hung out in the woods for a little longer before heading back to camp. You even walked back hand and hand which made your stomach flip. The bonfire had gotten smaller and there were less campers outside then when you left. Allison and Scott were making out against a tree that was a few feet out of sight from chaperones. For dinner, the camp had a BBQ, it was simple; just hamburgers and hotdogs with fruit and a couple random sides. Once you both got your plate you quickly realized all the bugs were making it impossible to eat. When you first suggested that it would be better to eat in your tent, Stiles' face went white and then turned a deep shade of red. Nonetheless he followed to the tent and as predicted Allison and Lyida were nowhere in sight. He started awkwardly complementing the decor out of nervousness which made you laugh. Both of you ate in awkward silence for a couple moments but then started talking about the itinerary the camp had planned. Right as the conversation got more serious, the girl came back to the tent. Stiles ended up leaving and they interrogated you about the nature of what happened when you were alone with him. You told them the truth, it wasn’t anything crazy so they were a little disappointed in you. 

The three of you went down to the showering area which was actually quite nice. You thought it would be similar to a hand built out house or something. You weren’t even expecting hot water so it was a nice surprise. They even had electricity, thank god because you didn’t want to go to sleep with wet hair. By the time you were walking back to the tent it was pretty late. After being in school all day and being socially interactive all day long was making you really tired. It didn’t take you long to fall asleep after you laid down. After you’d been sleeping for a couple hours, you heard a tap on the metal frame of the tent. It scared you at first but then you heard a voice. 

“Y/N?” you immediately recognized it as Stiles. 

“Stiles? What are you doing oh my god you scared the crap out of me!” you whispered. 

“Meet me where we talked in 20 minutes,” he whispered and before you could respond he walked away. 

You were taken back for a second but figured you would go. Maybe he wanted to tell you how he felt. Why else would he come and ask you to talk in the middle of the night? You got up, trying your best not to wake up the other girls while changing. It was freezing, to the point where you couldn’t stop your teeth from chattering. You were really scared as you walked toward the trail that led away from the camp. Before you went to bed the camp was bright and full of energy and now it was dark and deadly quiet. You wrapped your arms around yourself to give you a sense of security. Once the camp was out of sight it was even more dark than before. It took you about 10 or 15 minutes but you were finally where he agreed to meet you. You recognized the nearby long that was almost completely hollow. 

“Stiles?” you asked out loud. 

“Are you there?” you asked again when you heard nothing. You kept hearing sounds of leaves crunching and different animals. 

“Stiles!” you called out a bit louder. 

“I’m here,” he called out. 

You were about to call out one last time when suddenly arms were wrapped around your waist and mouth. You were trying to scream and thrash away, whatever had you lifted you up then tucked you behind a tree. 

“It’s me, chill out it’s Stiles,” he whispered on top of your head. 

“What are you-” you started. 

“That wasn’t me, that thing that said ‘i’m here’ we think it’s a mimic. Just be very quiet for a second,” he said, still covering your mouth with his hands. 

He quickly stopped talking as you both peered over the tree. Your heart was pounding out of your chest as you watched what appeared to be Stiles walking past you guys. Tears were now streaming down your face, Stiles was wiping the ones he could reach with his thumb. When Stiles had picked you up from behind you stayed in that position even when he pulled you both to the ground. He was on his feet, in a catcher position and you were sitting on your bottom with your knees to your chest. He still had his arm wrapped around your waist, you could see his arm rise and fall with how rapid you were breathing. After the mimic was out of sight he started leading you in an unknown direction. 

“I’m kinda freaking out right now,” you said shakily. 

“I'm sorry I know this is a lot. You came to my tent and told me to meet up at the spot. I didn’t realize it was the mimic until it was something weird until I came into the woods wandering around looking for you,” he said. 

“Why are you acting so nonchalant about this, I feel like I’m losing my mind,” you said. 

“I’m sorry I can’t explain everything right now but trust me we need to keep going,” he said, it made you nervous to see how scared he was but you held your ground.

“I’m not going to follow you blindly into the woods. I don’t even know what we're running from, the safest place for us is the camp so-” you started but were interrupted. 

“YOU don’t know what’s at stake here. This thing is dangerous, like crazy strong and fast not only that it changes forms so you never know what it really looks like. I really want a chance to be able to take you to the formal and I won’t be able to if we're dead. So I beg of you, blindly follow me and I promise I’ll show you why you’ll trust me to do it again,” he said quietly into your ear before pulling you by the arm, safe to say you didn’t have much to say after that.

[whoslaurapalmer]

it's not even like I'm living extravagantly or luxuriously or anything but it's like. well now I have to stare at the ceiling and wonder, can I keep cable television. should I bundle the internet with my phone. should I stop this service. would I save money going forward if I paid for this instead. phone calls I have to make about if I have to open my own accounts. if I rent what are my options? what can I take? I can take This but I can't take That. can I poke holes in the wall and hang clocks and posters and pictures. can I paint. what's available to me. I might be able to keep the house. I might be able to buy. I might have to rent. so little is available on my income. but that's what programs are for and my cousin's wife knows a lot about what my options are and where to start because I don't know where to start!! and she knows what I'd like so she's coming over on Friday to talk about everything

calling people to cancel my mom's upcoming appointments. wondering what I should try and sell or keep. should I return this. can I take that with me. is taking a couple puzzles considered an extravagance. it shouldn't be, BUT. where would I put This. can i take the pile of notebooks where my mom and dad wrote notes for each other to update each other about their day and family stuff because some days they didnt see each other when my dad worked weird hours. i want it because thats a piece of my life and it's them but where do i put it if i move. it's not stuff that has to be decided TODAY it's literally been just two whole entire days. but it's stuff that has to be decided soon. by the end of this month. so basically. now. I should measure things tomorrow. I should think about donating and selling and. everything.

my aunt: okay this is just my opinion but I think the house is too big for you and you'd be living alone

me: ....................I'd be living alone regardless??????

and it really isn't a lot of house. like. I'd rearrange things, I'd paint, I could, make my mom's room into a craft room, she always wanted me to have a craft room!!!!! but do I need a dining room!! and!!!!! I don't know. if I had a smaller space I could maybe have a craft section in a dining room. would I even be able to get something with a dining room. I just want something comfortable with room thats mine where i can sing and my brother can come over and do his laundry and i have space for all my things and i feel okay. but there are certain debts to be paid with the house, if i stayed and if i didnt stay. we have to handle the car too. my cousin's wife said don't rule out any options!! we'll look into it and talk about it!! and I'm glad she's being so helpful and optimistic. and I shouldn't worry about housing in particular until we really talk on Friday. but it's in my mind. of course.

I! am still holding it together okay!! There's a lot to get in order and think about and at least I know where everything is and it's, occupying. but it's also like. yes I'm doing such a good job and I'm proud of me but I'm only doing all this because my mom isn't here. my brother says something funny and I want to tell her. the guy on wheel of fortune tonight solved puzzles so wrong and I wanted to see her face when he solved wrong and hear her laugh. I want to watch dancing with the stars with her tomorrow. we didn't get to finish watching halloween wars and now all the holiday baking has started. she's not gonna find out who killed lester on only murders. I still have to go to the endocrinologist on Thursday, because it's too close to try and reschedule. I have to go to our cardiologist for my annual at the beginning of December and i have to tell him that my mom that he saw for over 30 years and was supposed to have a double appointment with me isn't here anymore. I have to see my eye doctor in January and tell her and I know she's gonna cry. i have to switch my insurance but that's also because my plan's not being offered next year so unrelated but it's another phone call. it's a payment I have to make now. it's a phone call I wanted to make with my mom so she could tell me I was doing it right. I know what questions to ask and everything but. I wanted her there. I still haven't told my sister. my mom didn't want me to say anything to her. and I respect that and I'd never talk to her again, for my own reasons, but I should tell her anyway. but now I'm the one that has the copy of her birth certificate because the little safe of all our important papers is mine now. and I'm only 80% sure she has one, so first i have to ask her boyfriend if she has one for sure. which is like. man what a pain.

but my brother and I watched some episodes of crime scene kitchen together and he really enjoyed it and that made me happy. the christmas episode of andy griffith was on tonight and it made us laugh. I put my mom and dad's wedding photo in my room and it makes me feel safe to look at it. and right now I just have to go to bed. and see what tomorrow looks like. Tuesday when my alarm goes off, the radio station I have it tuned to does one of my favorite segments. my best friend made me the BEST chocolate chip cookies in the whole world and there's still three left for dessert tomorrow. my second cousin posted a picture of like six years ago when her daughter was born and my mom held her and it made me feel all warm inside because I wasn't expecting to see a picture of my mom and she loved holding babies. my brother is still drawing the comic he's been working on. we played super mario wonder today. we really like being able to play a mario game where we're both playing at the same time and my mom was really excited when I told her that the other day. pusheen still exists. I'm here.

[dollarbin]

Dollar Bin #18:

Bob Dylan's Dream / Lord Franklin

At some point in 1988 I discovered that there was music in my childhood home.

We'd grew up largely without it. I had an ancient, AM-only, dial radio at the head of my child sized bed, but that was strictly for listening to Vin Scully call Dodger games. At some point around 83 I spun the corroded dial experimentally and heard Borderline followed by Thriller. It was terrifying, and I did not repeat the experiment.

Therefore, as a child, the only song I remember singing along to was this ditty, which always immediately preceded Vinny declaring that it was "time for Dodger Baseball!"

Of course, I heard snatches of music outside our home. When Dolly, Emmylou and Linda put out Trio in 87 my mom bought the tape, shoved it into our red and white Vanagon's deck and kept that thing on repeat for years. And on the fourth of July I'd watch the annual Beach Boys Special at friends' houses while we lay about, sunburnt from head to toe and waiting for rock hard burgers off the grill. And yes, I'd sit in the park every summer and try to figure out how to eat KFC while the US Navy Brass band played. But all that music was around me, not in me.

Then, in 88, my buddy Matt's parents got cable, so MTV happened and we learned all about girls, I guess, from Straight Up Now Tell Me. By that point Buffalo Soldier, Shout, Brass Monkey and Take My Breath Away where spinning at elementary school dances and all the cool kids were bravely listening to Guns and Roses.

But I wasn't cool. I recognize this fact must be a surprise to all of you given the incomparably cool nature of this august blog and the meteoric rise of my Gordon Lightfoot musings among the cognoscenti (I have no doubt that among my legion of 14 followers cheesebot47 is Obama and dannhann is Bruuuuce while bloggin - I see you gentlemen! Thanks for my grand total of two heart emojis!), but I feel that my uninterrupted lifelong run of uncoolness needs to be acknowledged nonetheless. As proof I offer up the following evidence: my initial attempt at getting into music in 88 was buying the cassette single for Chicago's Look Away:

Yeah, definitely not cool. Even my father thought the song spewd chunks and the only song he ever sang to us as kids was Home on the Range. Baby! Look away!

So I did hear music at age 12. But my home had none to offer, and I'd yet to hear anything that really spoke to me, that shouted its way into my soul.

Then, somehow, furniture got rearranged or I opened my eyes a little wider and found a hitherto unknown cabinet in our living room. There weren't fur coats inside, or mothballs; nor did it take me straight to Mr. Tumnus. No, it was better than that. Instead, when I looked inside, I found The Freewheelin' Bob Dylan.

That's right: there was a record player in my home that I'd never noticed before, and records sat underneath it. No one had touched anything in there for a decade or more. But I knelt down and figured out what to do with it somehow and the next thing I knew I was listening to Blowin' in the Wind.

Picture me on my 12 year old knees, all 80 pounds of me watching the record spin, holding my breath. What was this noise? Why did it sound so glorious? And why, oh why, wouldn't it play smoothly?

You see, from the first moment Dylan began slapping at his 6 string and asking how many roads a man must walk down, the filthy, bruised record and the turntable's utterly battered needle refused to meld. I could hear only snatches of Blowing in the Wind before the whole thing popped and bolted and before you knew it there was a broken harmonica blast and Dylan was already telling me that he'd learned the next song somewhere down in the U-nited States. Then everything erupted again and it wasn't long before the needle leapt and dragged into full skid before thudding to a stop.

And yet somehow, one song on my parents' long forgotten and utterly ravaged copy of the Dylan's first masterpiece was largely intact and skip-free: at age 12 I joined Dylan on a train going west; I too dreamed a dream and weathered many a first storm. But Bob Dylan's Dream did not make me sad. Rather, it took my breath away.

And it still does.

I suspect each of us has a specific, elemental melody that insistently tugs at us; like an invisible tether, there's a combination of notes and pacing out there that's ineffably linked with our individual soul. Somehow, wonderfully, the borrowed melody Dylan used for his Dream is that tether for me.

Of course at that point I couldn't put any words together to describe what was happening to me when I listened. I was just fired up. What's more, I found that each time I replayed the record a bit more of it would emerge intact: the tortured needle harvested bits of dirt and debris from the grooves each time it passed through. Sure, I had to bully the record through several skips, but eventually I could track most of the record.

Next, somehow, probably at my friend Eric's, I found a blank tape and a turntable connected to a tape deck and was able to transfer my chopped up record into something I could carry around in my pocket like a talisman. There was a world of music out there, just for me. I had not found it yet, but I had a map.

And so I did what came naturally: I took the world's worst version of the The Freewheelin' Bob Dylan to my next Dungeons and Dragons game. Doing so made total sense to me. I was clearly 12 years old.

I emailed my personal dungeon lord, Jon, this week and asked him to recall what happened next. But Jon remembers nothing, which is surprising, because something definitely happened. The moment I pressed play on my brutalized copy of Freewheelin' in the middle of Jon's personally scripted orcfest he freaked the hell out, unplugged the stereo and carried my character sheet out to his dad's Weber, ranting all the while about how if I ever brought such crazed and unbearable sounds to one of his games again my character (I think he was named Illure...) would get doused in lighter fluid and would serve as a fitting holocaust to every god one could name. And Jon was true to his precociously literate 12 year old word: a few months later, when I brought not Bob Dylan but instead swiped cans of beer to D&D, Illure did indeed taste Jon's threatened flames and I was altogether banned from D&D henceforth. My buddy Jon: always totally awesome.

It's too bad about Illure. But I wouldn't change a thing.

So let's talk about Lord Franklin. Dylan openly acknowledged that he borrowed the tune for his Dream from Martin Carthy's version of the original. Let's drop the needle on the song's gold standard: Pentangle's version from their wrongly maligned Dollar Bin treasure, Cruel Sister.

Listen to John Renbourn, just above a whisper, recall his sighing dream. Bert Jansch's weary concertina trembles and pulses and Jacqui McShee's accompanying voice arches above and beyond until Renbourn finally produces the world's smallest and gnarliest electric guitar. Wow. What a song; what a version. That's my personal pulse friends; that's my tether.

Who knows how far back this melody actually goes; its primary known source, the Irish song Cailín Óg a Stór, is least 400 years old, but surely people were humming this thing under their breath long before any peer of Shakespeare thought about claiming ownership of it in print. Maybe my ever so great grandmother had some hand in its creation; or maybe yours did. I'll bet people all over the world have been warbling this melody in their own tongues for time out of mind.

Take a listen to the Carthy version that first inspired Dylan:

You can hear the song's racing pulse in Carthy's fleet picking beneath the swaying, stately melody. Maybe that tension of paces is part of the song's allure for me. I love slowly sung songs that still contain lurching threats of violence, terror or despair. Think Danger Bird or This Monkey's Gone to Heaven; think Mr. Bojangles.

Sure, Jerry's telling us his story with a smile. But he's not okay. He's grieving deeply as he sings, channeling his old prison mates' terrible loss for his dog.

Cailín Óg a Stór is a root stock that's been grafted beyond Franklin's tale and Dylan's dream. Happily, Stephen Stills' own take, a reworking entitled I Suck, remains unreleased. But check out Fairport Convention's A Sailor's Life. Hear the incomparable Sandy Denny spin that glorious melody in a new direction.

It takes some real guts to completely reconsider a song this elemental, but people are forever doing just that. Check out Renbourn's own masterful and hilarious version from the 90's. Just look at the guy sweat as he giggles then dives deeply in.

All of these examples help make Dylan's Dream particularly audacious. Forget telling timeless tails of terror on the deep; Dylan instead takes us to a scene from his own childhood: there they are, gathered about an old wooden stove, the first few friends he had. They never much thought they could get very old; but they have, they are all aged now, just like me and Jon, and all our long ago friends from 88.

Only art is timeless, Lord Franklin reminds us. Only art can never die.

Rest in Peace Sinead.

[blessphemy]

✨ Fic Writing Review 2023 ✨

thanks for the tag @non-plutonian-druid!

the actual format of this game is this post but i rearranged it a bit so that i could hide my extremely long list of fics under a cut

Fandom fic events 2023

Murderbot Diaries New Year Gift Exchange

Yuletide Draft Dodgers

Murderbot AUpril Collection (open and accepts submissions)

2023 Aspec Murderbot Diaries

2023 PresAugust

We Were It // It Will Be Us: A TMBD Art Exhibition (open and accepts submissions)

Botober 2023

Upcoming 2024

Events:

i'm doing the Murderbot Diaries New Year Gift Exchange (2024) :3

Perhaps i'll post something for the annual 3/3 for Three collection idk (this collection is open and accepts submissions, and it spikes on March 3rd of each year)

WIPs:

Gift exchange fic

Absolute monster of a nullverse!network effect AU fic. i'm trying so hard to get draft 1 of this beast finished it's been beating my ass for over a year but i'm gonna Get It

Continue Via Solitude updates.

a 5+1 ASR bad ends fic that explores some meta shit. namely trust, forgiveness, and sci-fi horror genre vs canon.

Words and fics 2023

let's find out just how cringe (fun) i've been on ao3. i'm like. jeebus creebus i've posted a lot this year huh.

105,486 words of fan fiction. all of it murderbot. let's look at them going right down the statistics page (default sorted by hits, tho it gets kind of messy at the end with and i got lazy):

30,336 words of Via Solitude, an All Systems Red AU where murderbot has to do wilderness survival.

~5k words that's just a repost of Threat As Greeting, except with fresh interactive CSS effects.

3,346 words top 3 SURPRISING things you didn't know about the SECUNIT who pulled you out of an INCINERATOR (2023 gift exchange) outsider POV from the characters featured in Wells' pre-canon short story

1,502 words Aspec Drabbles (for the Aspec Murderbot Diaries event) it lot of fun to work with strict 100-word drabbles.

13,837 words References NULL: Logs From Project Murderbot [nullverse] the most purely concentrated angst/whump from the nullverse series yet. handle with care or skip it.

6,552 words How To Go On A Camping Trip - a guide for anxious SecUnits who are bad at vacationing (2023 gift exchange) i really liked this one tbh. fun standalone.

2,488 words Improve Your Baby AI With This One Weird Trick! (2023 gift exchange) my personal fic-titling theme for the gift exchange was "clickbait."

7,875 Alien Refuge (AUpril inspired) This is a Homestuck crossover, and reportedly the first time multiple people willingly interacted with homestuck-affiliated content, and they liked it. gottem. it's also pretty good, i did a nice job injecting homestuckism tone into the murderbot narrative style If I Do Say So Myself.

911 words No Comment: Shut Up And Dance [nullverse] fluff and humor. tfw your secunit friend (murderbot) is crashing in your living room and you (dr. ratthi) have insomnia.

2,922 words MetaMorphoSys (AUpril inspired) listen i NEED the next big fandom trend to be an AU world where people metamorphose inside cocoons. hear me out. HEAR ME OUT. in this fic we take the fridge horror of canon murderbot diaries and make it visceral, wet, biological, and ethically Even Worse. get yr Amena emotions also.

0 words SecUnit Technician Bingo Card it's funny. idk.

3,438 words nullverse reference sheet [nullverse bonus content] self indulgent AU notes

2,290 words Systems: Splorch [nullverse bonus content] a friend of mine said "how long until we get a fic with #oviposition in the murderbot diaries ao3?" i took the answer to that question into my own two capable hands at 7.5 hours. you're welcome.

2,562 words Artifacts NULL: Fire Festival [nullverse] slice-of-life friend times with nostalgia vibes. how far we've come.jpg.

388 words Entries shared by the Society for Conservation of Feed Artifacts (SCFA) (created for TMBD in-universe robot art gallery, which is an open collection that accepts any submissions!) wait this reminds me i have one more to post. i'll get to it.

9,314 words in 31 fics written for (Botober 2023) daily prompts. turned out to be a fun exercise and exploration of bot culture tho it took me longer than the month of october to finish.

4 fanarts of fics that i liked.

26 fanbindings where i printed out and made booklets out of fics that i liked.

2 translations.

3,080 words Refrain [nullverse bonus content] if you're unfamiliar with my Brand this will sound unhinged. if you are familiar with my Brand you know by now that i have a knack for taking literally Anything and treating it with tender loving care and unexpected deft so this doesn't even surprise you. tl;dr it's porn of two bots having a deeply OSHA-unapproved Fuck Session, there's no genitals involved, and it's tagged #Vivisection. it's pretty good if you're into robots and perhaps mild gore.

Rules & Tags for this game

Rules: Feel free to show whatever stats you have. Only want to show Ao3 stats? Rock on. Want to include some quantitative info instead of stats? Please do this. Want to change how yours is presented? Absolutely do that. Would rather eat glass than do this? Please don’t eat glass, just keep on scrolling.

@fishdetective @beatrice-otter @snugglyeldritchjellyfish @ilovedthestars and anyone who feels like it

[graveyardgirl4200]

Title: Blunt Holidays

Opening Scene: The Apartment - December 23rd

The camera pans over a cluttered but cozy house in dalbeattie. Christmas lights are strung chaotically along the walls, blinking in no particular rhythm. A small, artificial Christmas tree sits on a coffee table, barely holding up the weight of its ornaments: an eclectic mix of Lego figurines, Monster High painted baubles, and a single GTA-branded ornament Ash swears is “totally limited edition.” Empty pizza boxes double as gift boxes under the tree.

INT. LIVING ROOM - MORNING

ASH (mid-20s, shaggy blue hair, wearing a GTA V hoodie) lounges on the couch, a joint lazily balanced between his fingers. He’s scrolling through Tumblr on his phone while occasionally glancing at the TV, where a chaotic match of GTA Online plays out. Beside him JESSE (early-20s, glasses, wearing a Forest green “the cure” branded hoodie) carefully organises a rainbow of Squishmallows on the couch, rearranging them until it’s just right.

MURDO (early 20’s, scruffy, Scottish accent, wearing pajama pants covered in Lego bricks) enters carrying a tray with three mismatched mugs of coffee.

MURDO:

You two know Christmas is about sharing, right? Maybe let the Christmas tree have one Squishmallow.

JESSE:

They’re festive! They create ambiance. Ash, back me up.

ASH:

(half-listening, eyes on his game)

Ambiance is important. (takes a drag from their joint) Also, I’m like 90% sure Santa smokes. He’d totally appreciate the vibe.

MURDO:

Oh, aye? And what vibe’s that? “My roommates are hoarders”?

Murdo gestures to the table, where piles of Lego minifigures are arranged in a perfect battle scene: Lego Darth Vader holding hands with an elf, fighting a monster made of Lego skeleton parts.

JESSE:

Don’t act all high and mighty, you virgin

MURDO:

(mini-figure Darth Vader in hand)

nigga

JESSE:

(throws up hands)

The doorbell rings. The trio freezes.

ASH:

Pizza?

MURDO:

It’s 10 a.m.

JESSE:

Santa?

MURDO:

Aye, because the dodgy cunt’s known for ringing doorbells instead of breaking and entering.

Ash reluctantly pauses his game and heads for the door. He opens it to reveal an unreasonably peppy woman in a Christmas sweater, holding a clipboard. This is MRS. HUFFINGTON (50s, PTA energy).

MRS. HUFFINGTON:

Hi there, neighbors! I’m here to talk to you about the Annual Holly Jolly Caroling Competition!

Ash blinks, clearly unprepared for human interaction. Jesse and Murdo peek out from the living room.

MRS. HUFFINGTON:

Every year, we bring Christmas cheer to the neighborhood! This year’s prize is a £5,000 donation to the winner’s charity of choice!

ASH:

Uhhh… okay?

MRS. HUFFINGTON:

And as newcomers to the building, I insisted we sign your little household up!

ASH:

(significantly less okay)

…What now?

MRS. HUFFINGTON:

Congratulations! Practice starts tonight. We’ll need your song list by noon.

She thrusts a folder into Ash’s hands and sweeps off before anyone can protest. Ash stares blankly at the papers, then slowly closes the door.

MURDO:

What in the name of The Mcrib is that?

ASH:

(reading, panicked)

“Mandatory participation for all registered tenants…”

JESSE:

(eyes lighting up)

We’re going caroling?!

ASH:

(throws the folder onto the couch)

Absolutely not.

JESSE:

But the prize!

ASH:

Who cares about five grand?!

MURDO:

Charity aside, five grand could buy a lot of Legos.

ASH:

Not the point.

JESSE:

(gesturing to his Squishmallows)

Do you know how many rare editions I could get for—

ASH:

(stern, interrupting)

No.

The trio sits in silence for a beat.

MURDO:

So… what’s the plan?

ASH:

Easy. We’re going to sabotage Christmas.

Cue upbeat punk rock Christmas music as the title card “Blunt Holidays” flashes across the screen.

EXT. SUBURBAN NEIGHBORHOOD - EVENING

The group stands awkwardly at the end of a well-lit driveway. Snow machines are spraying fake flakes onto perfectly manicured lawns. Other groups of carolers roam the neighborhood in full Victorian garb, harmonizing flawlessly. Ash, Jesse, and Murdo, however, look wildly out of place.

• Ash is in a GTA Online Christmas sweater with a weed leaf wearing a Santa hat.

• Jesse has a Santa hat perched on his head and a Squishmallow (a penguin in a scarf) tucked under his arm.

• Murdo, who looks dead inside, wears an oversized elf costume he definitely borrowed from a kid’s school play.

A neighbor opens their door. The trio freezes.

NEIGHBOR:

Oh, carolers! How lovely!

Ash steps forward, clearing his throat. Jesse holds up a music sheet.

JESSE:

Okay, we agreed: “Jingle Bells,” three-part harmony. Ready?

ASH:

(smirking) Oh, I’m ready.

Ash dramatically raises his arms, closes his eyes, and belts out:

ASH:

“WHEN YOU’RE CLOSE TO ME, I CAN FEEL YOUR HEARTBEAT!”

Jesse’s jaw drops.

JESSE:

Is that…?

MURDO:

Oh, bloody hell.

ASH:

(keeps going)

“I’LL HOLD YOU CLOSE, BUT YOU’RE ALWAYS SO FAR…”

Ash flails his arms theatrically, completely channeling the tortured energy of Muse’s “Supermassive Black Hole.” Jesse frantically tries to shove the music sheet in his face.

JESSE:

Ash! Wrong song! That’s not even Christmas!

ASH:

(ignoring him)

“THIS LOVE’S A GIFT FROM THE STAAAARS!”

The neighbor looks horrified but stays rooted in place, clutching her mug of cocoa. Murdo, sensing disaster, tries to intervene.

MURDO:

(grabbing Ash by the shoulders)

Alright, Bella Swan, maybe let’s reign it in!

ASH:

(pulls away, still singing)

“YOU’RE MY OWN PERSONAL BRAND OF HEROOOOIN!”

MURDO:

What does that even mean?!

Jesse drops his Squishmallow, stepping in front of Ash to try and salvage the situation.

JESSE:

(to neighbor)

I’m so sorry. We’ll do “Jingle Bells”! Murdo, back me up.

Murdo begrudgingly pulls out jingle bells from his pocket and starts shaking them half-heartedly. Jesse starts singing “Dashing through the snow…” but Ash interrupts with another dramatic Twilight soundtrack pick.

ASH:

“I KNOW WHAT YOU AREEE…”

MURDO:

Ash! That’s not even Muse anymore!

ASH:

“YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL, YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL…” (snaps fingers rhythmically)

“IT’S YOUR FACE!”

The neighbor slams the door. Silence.

JESSE:

Ash. What was that?

ASH:

That was art.

MURDO:

That was shite, mate.

JESSE:

People don’t want existential vampire anthems for Christmas! They want—

Ash cuts him off, holding up a finger.

ASH:

Correction: you don’t want existential vampire anthems. I’m bringing depth to this shallow holiday charade.

Murdo groans and starts walking down the driveway.

MURDO:

If anyone needs me, I’ll be at the hot cocoa stand drinking my weight in marshmallows.

JESSE:

(shouting after him)

You can’t just leave! We’re a group!

ASH:

(smirking)

Fine. I’ll go solo. I’m thinking next up: Paramore’s “Decode.”

JESSE:

(throwing up his hands)

You’re impossible.

ASH:

(sincerely)

And yet, so sparkly in the sunlight.

Cue Jesse chasing after Murdo while Ash keeps singing into the night.

EXT. ANOTHER HOUSE - EVENING

The trio stands on the porch of an elegant two-story house. A wreath big enough to be a hula hoop hangs on the front door, and twinkling lights wrap every visible surface. Inside, a family with small children gathers around a crackling fire.

MURDO:

(whispering)

Alright, Ash. Let’s keep it normal this time. No vampires. No weird confessions of undying love.

ASH:

(smirking)

Relax, Murdo. I’ve got this.

Murdo and Jesse exchange a worried glance as Ash takes the lead. He clears his throat dramatically, and the family inside looks delighted to see carolers.

Ash gives them a confident nod and starts rapping, off-key and WAY too loud:

ASH:

“BITCHES AIN’T—”

JESSE:

(cutting him off immediately, screaming)

NOOOO!

Jesse lunges forward, clamping his hand over Ash’s mouth just as the horrified mother inside gasps and covers her children’s ears.

MOTHER:

(stern)

Excuse me?

ASH:

(muffled, trying to continue)

“—SHIIIT BUT HOS AND—”

JESSE:

(panicking, still covering Ash’s mouth)

He meant ‘Deck the Halls’! That’s what he meant!

Murdo, trying to salvage the situation, starts shaking his jingle bells wildly and singing an overly cheerful “FA-LA-LA-LA-LAAA!” Jesse joins in, still gripping Ash’s face.

JESSE & MURDO:

“FA-LA-LA-LA-LA, LA-LA-LA-LA!”

Ash finally wrestles free, but instead of apologizing, he points at Jesse accusingly.

ASH:

(outraged)

You just censored Dre! That’s a crime, dude.

JESSE:

(whispering furiously)

This is Christmas caroling! It’s supposed to be family-friendly!

ASH:

(rolling his eyes)

Look, if Dre wanted his music to be censored, he wouldn’t have written bangers!

MURDO:

(trying to cover)

Uh, sorry about that, folks. He’s a bit… experimental.

The father steps into the doorway, frowning.

FATHER:

We have children.

ASH:

(defensive)

What? Kids gotta learn sometime!

Jesse practically drags Ash off the porch while Murdo bows apologetically to the family.

JESSE:

(hissing)

Are you trying to get us banned from the neighborhood?

ASH:

Hey, you can’t suppress creativity. That’s a slippery slope, my friend. Next thing you know, we’ll all be singing “All I Want for Christmas Is You” like brainwashed robots.

MURDO:

Mate, Mariah Carey would’ve been an improvement over that.

Ash scoffs, lighting a joint he clearly snuck out of his pocket.

ASH:

Whatever. Y’all just don’t appreciate my genius.

Murdo snatches the joint away mid-puff.

MURDO:

And I don’t appreciate getting slapped with a lawsuit.

The camera lingers on Jesse, still frazzled, clutching his Squishmallow like a stress ball.

JESSE:

(under his breath)

Next year, I’m caroling with strangers.

ASH:

(grinning)

They won’t understand you like I do.

Cue a carolers’ rendition of “Deck the Halls” in the background as the trio walks away, bickering loudly.

INT. APARTMENT - CHRISTMAS MORNING

The living room is a mess of crumpled wrapping paper, empty coffee mugs, and half-eaten cookies. The tiny Christmas tree on the coffee table somehow looks even more lopsided, leaning under the weight of a new ornament: a glittery joint that Ash crafted “in the spirit of the season.”

Ash, Jesse, and Murdo sit on the couch in their mismatched Christmas pajamas. Jesse’s are covered in Squishmallow prints, Ash’s are black with the GTA logo, and Murdo’s are the same Lego-covered ones from before.

ASH:

Alright, guys. Best part of Christmas morning. Let’s see what Santa brought!

JESSE:

Santa didn’t bring these. I wrapped all of them.

MURDO:

(sipping his coffee)

Aye, and you used about seven layers of tape per box. My fingers still haven’t forgiven you.

Jesse rolls his eyes and hands out the presents.

JESSE:

Here. Let’s do this in order of importance—me first.

He rips into his gift with dramatic flair, tossing the paper into the air like confetti. Inside, he finds a brand-new Squishmallow: a giant rainbow unicorn with glittery hooves and a sleepy face.

JESSE:

(gasping)

Sparkleina! I’ve been looking for her everywhere!

He hugs the Squishmallow tightly, looking near tears.

JESSE:

(to Ash and Murdo)

You guys are the best!

ASH:

(casually)

Yeah, yeah. We’re amazing. Next!

Murdo opens his gift next. He peels back the wrapping paper carefully, revealing a box of rare Lego minifigures. His eyes widen.

MURDO:

(shocked)

The 1989 Tim Burton Batmobile set?! Where did you even find this?

ASH:

(grinning smugly)

Let’s just say I have connections.

MURDO:

(suspicious)

Did you steal this?

ASH:

Not directly. But let’s focus on the giving spirit, yeah?

Murdo shakes his head but is clearly thrilled, already pulling pieces out of the box.

Finally, Ash grabs his own gift, shaking it like a kid.

ASH:

Man, this better be good.

He tears it open to reveal the holy grail: a brand-new copy of GTA 6. For a moment, he just stares, speechless.

ASH:

(whispering)

Is this… real?

JESSE:

(grinning)

Limited early release. Don’t ask how I got it.

ASH:

(still whispering)

I’m gonna cry.

MURDO:

(leaning over)

You better not cry on my couch.

Ash suddenly springs up, clutching the game to his chest like a newborn baby.

ASH:

Best. Christmas. EVER.

[six-of-ravens]

plan for today:

the usual housework (minus the laundry which I did yesterday heck yeah)

rearrange some things in the living room, mainly turning the kitchen table into a writing area and rearranging the shelf with the record player

get out the fall decorations and decorate

potentially do the annual storage room cleaning (or maybe leave that for tomorrow)

get Act 2 of my north plot outline done (also investigate whether I have printer ink or if I'll have to make a journey to staples tomorrow)

work on that miniature some more (got 2 little cabinets done last night!)

defrost some of the frozen pumpkin puree and see if it's still good, and then figure out what to make with it

[vael]

2023 Annual Review

"I might as well copy-paste last year's Annual Review..."

Of course, even last year I thought the same thing. "A tiger doesn't change its stripes," and now in my 35th year, it's apparent I won't be changing mine.

What went well this year?

Parenting. I'm very aware of the cost of lackluster parenting. "It's a terrible thing to do to someone." No matter how strained I am, I've said I am going to be a dedicated father. This year I dedicated myself to both my girls and continued my usual routine of rallying the boy to greatness.

When parenting, I track their milestones and development because I want the children to be able to play at (and somewhat over) the level of their peers so that they're able to play with the maximal number of children. Milestones are also easily measured: they can do the thing or not. My son still struggles to relate to his peers today because he's never been on their level, and it's a pitiable thing which I personally experienced as a child. It lead to my poor self-esteem and lack of ambition. When I celebrate milestones, this is why.

Violet. "My little storm cloud." 🖤 Violet continues to meet her milestones. She's ahem strong-willed, sweet, intelligent, curious, and funny: I think she's picked up on my ability to parody -- songs and such -- and she'll make up her own little parodies of various things. This year she became a lot less fearful.

Olivia. "Child of light." I thought Violet was an especially happy baby; Olivia redefined that for me. For her first year, we called her the colon D baby. This guy -> :D

Olivia is an absolute joy to be around. She took 13 months to walk, which was a surprise given that Violet was fully walking at 10 ½ months, but it looks like she instead allocated her effort towards speech, because this girl can talk. And enunciate! She's also good with her fine motor skills.

My wife was able to flawlessly breastfeed Olivia for six straight months, which is a big achievement.

Made two new friends. Each from different countries, and each of them web developers. I always love hearing about other cultures and it was because of my Argentinian friend that I...

Started learning Spanish; soft-quit PGO. This year I finally was able to put down Pokémon GO. Partially because I'm playing Pokemon Sleep now, but mostly that I was a little too obsessive about PvP and I felt childish being distracted in public so that I could play the PvE events.

I started Duolingo mid-November. My learning strategy is slow-paced and with frequent review. I fully achieve "legendary" on the current unit before moving on to the next. It's working, and it's got to be better for my cognition, and certainly for my life.

Rearranged the house. My wife came up with the plan. My son took my old office and my new office is in the study, previously our entertainment room. I could barely stand living in this house before, but now I'm comfortable.

Game development. I may have burned myself doing it, but I can't argue with the results. I don't think I've ever been better poised for a successful year than I am now.

This year I also received the most volunteer help I ever have. Aforementioned Argentinian friend wrote a robust weather script, and Tinydark's Raigen helped develop tinydark.com and Hub features; I'm also excited to announce we've been able to hire him to work remotely at my workplace. We even had an artist draw some holiday costumes for Tinyblob, our mascot.

Health. I took almost three months off eating "optional sugar," breaking my nightly ice cream routine. I'd felt like I was starting to get fat, so I simultaneously started focusing more on building my upper body. I went as far as to take before-and-afters for Facebook, but I eventually had to stop so I could focus on game dev. Though I stopped my upper body work, I did start jogging in the morning. I fell out of the habit once Daylight Saving Time hit, and the girls' circadian rhythms were an hour ahead.

Artificial Intelligence. Not exactly "my" win, but AI has been instrumental in this year's high production. To think it's only gotten better throughout the year and stands to get even better, it's such a privilege to be able to use AI. That's just code; assets have always been a problem for my game development, but AI trivializes some of my asset issues (it's still pretty bad proper asset generation).

What didn't go so well?

Relentless work ethic. I have a long, contemplative post on this here, but: I am too ambitious. "A good problem to have." Well, in August I had my first real panic attack at 3AM. I thought it was a heart attack at first. But what's mildly concerning is that I felt stronger for it after; I overcame it on my own and that now that I know what it is, I'm better prepared for it. I didn't feel like I should try to avoid this at all, but rather that I'm more prepared for a second panic attack. Seems kinda not-a-good mentality.

My body. I said my forward neck posture would be my focus of the year, and I did a passable job of it, but it wasn't enough. I still get headaches and they feel like they're getting worse. We don't have the money nor do I have the bandwidth to see a rolfer, and I'm not sure what to do other than try to keep my posture in mind throughout the day. I tried to train myself to sleep without a pillow but had minimal success. I typically lay down once a day, mid-day if work allows it, for about 15 minutes just to clear my head and alleviate some of the pain.

I also abused caffeine: by my definition, two cups/packets/sessions a day. That likely contributed to the panic attack.

My focus. Nothing new here. It's just hard to truly focus when my morning's waylaid by children and I'm needed throughout the day. Interruptions break focus, so that's that: I cannot truly focus. The time I get at night is rarely good for focusing considering it's so scarce, the girls could wake up at any time, and that's typically the bulk of time I get to spend talking with my wife.

Buried. Two-under-two, working my job, working tinydark, doing (it seems) more chores than the typical husband does, my crumbling body and keeping myself healthy are the primary stressors.

No sympathy allowed; I chose this path and would choose it again.

Finances. We had two kids in two years (I regret not waiting an extra six months) so it's to be expected, but we've found ourselves deep in the negatives at the end of the year. Inflation's a real killer. We (ie: my wife) made some progress with the decision to grocery shop at two different stores for our weekly shopping trip, but the extra store is Trader Joe's... full of novel temptations. We're still better off for it, anyway.

Released neither Black Crown: Exhumed nor Bean Grower. I did have to take two weeks off for some contracting, but ultimately I just decided to spend more time on URPG, and everything takes longer than I expect.

What did I learn?

I feel like this year, I didn't get too worked up about our lack of financial progress. It feels more like acceptance than complacency. I will be free, unburied when my dream is realized: we just need to save up enough money for a down payment on a new house build, then sustain our finances while it's built, and finally sell this house for a minimum of $100k in the bank when all is said and done. I have confirmed this is entirely possible, and I'm grateful to have moved South before the pandemic. This is why it's acceptance: achieving this peace of mind is the only way I can finally buy the ice cream.

Otherwise, I've meditated on it, and honestly: I don't know that I really learned anything notable. At least as far as wisdom vs. tangible knowledge.

Goals and Expectations: 2024

Game dev. I can at least guarantee Bean Grower's getting a final release, presumably onto an app store. I'm giving myself three damn months for it. Black Crown is also getting three damn months, but I will concede that Steam Store support might be a stretch goal. Either way, I'm ending this year with two full titles under my belt.

Financial recovery. Sort of a given, and who knows, maybe the 15,000 hours I've spent building a game studio will actually pan out this year.

-- --

Welp, figger that's it. Vael

[invincible-selfxmade-punk]

Tomorrow is the last day of spring break.

I have had a good one even though I didn't go anywhere or really do anything except house work. But I did get quite a bit done. Saw a lot of movies on SHUDDER and worked my way through the 101 greatest horror movie moments.

Honestly you should see it just for the Tom Savini and Tony Todd interviews. It was really good! There were so many directors and actors from movies that I liked that I had never seen inteeviewed before. IT DOES CONTAIN SPOILERS.

A few days before I had fallen asleep watching Lake Mungo and I'd actually tried to watch it another time and fell asleep that time too. So now I don't have to see it because the show told me exactly how I ended. Which saved me another 2 hours.

I swept and mopped the whole house even though it needs it again, repotted my plant, and cleaned off the top of the refrigerator. I also did laundry, took the cat in for her annual vet visit, and dyed my hair gray again ( I'm already going gray in spots so years ago I said to hell with it I want to control where the gray goes and make it look good so I dyed long streaks all through my hair and colored them gray ) and it looks fabulous. But gray does not last as a dye so you have to keep doing it over and over

Yesterday hubby and I actually had a date day where he finally went to check out one of my favorite restaurants here in town and we came back home and watched My Best Friend's Exorcism together.

I think I liked it more than he did but he liked it okay.💙

I also beat my highest level on Woodoku by seven levels and got a tie for the most awards I've ever gotten on it.

Now I have to go into school and rearrange my room because I want everyone sitting in different places after spring break.

And that's going to take a lot of time just dragging desks around.

And then I have to figure out who I'm sitting next to who. Right now I don't even care who works well together it's just going to be who can sit next to each other without killing each other at this point. In fact I am purposefully putting people together that don't necessarily like each other just because I'm sick and tired of all the talking.

I hope and pray I have many more Spring Breaks to come, but the older I get the more I start looking at things as what if this were my last one. I hope it's not but even if it was it was very productive and I did most importantly get a lot of rest and slept in every single day.

If any of you were fortunate enough to be off on spring break I hope it was a good one for you too and even if not I hope you have a great week next week.

[automatismoateo]

Christians Everywhere Are Blissfully Unaware Their Christmas Trees Are Totally Pagan via /r/atheism

Christians Everywhere Are Blissfully Unaware Their Christmas Trees Are Totally Pagan

Local Evangelical Christopher Bradshaw is now a three-time winner of his neighborhood’s annual Christmas Tree Competition for Best-In-Show, and he spent the morning looking at his Christmas tree making some last-minute ornament rearrangements to improve the tree’s glow.

“I just love Christmas, and the reminder that Baby Jesus came to the world on this day to free mankind from the torment of Hell,” Bradshaw explained. “And there’s no part I love more than having a big Christmas tree lighting up my living room. My family growing up only kept a small tree, and I promised myself that, when I had my own place and my own family, I would have the best, most beautiful Christmas tree in the whole town, and that’s a promise I have kept.”

On the mantle above the Bradshaw family’s fireplace was a display of the three Christmas tree trophies the family had won.

“I just love how Christian this tradition is, and how it’s totally reverent to God, the Virgin Mary, Joseph, the Three Wise Men, and of Christianity in general. Yep, there is certainly nothing pagan about Christmas trees. Nothing pagan at all! There’s just no way the symbolism of contemporary Christians bringing a giant tree into the house had anything to do with, say, ancient Egyptians using green palms to worship Ra, or ancient Romans using fir trees to celebrate Saturnalia, or pagan Germans and Scandinavian Vikings in the single-digit centuries worshipping Thor and other deities via oak trees— no way! Christmas trees are totally an original Christian concept created solely for reverence toward Jesus. Definitely not some kind of convenient appropriation of pagan rituals revolving around the end of the farming season at the seasonal winter solstice that were utilized to convert them to Christianity by mutually celebrating comfortably familiar customs the pagans already had. No siree! And I’m sure the whole tradition of gift-giving has nothing to do with the Roman one of giving gifts during their December Saturnalia, or the gift-giving of the Germanic tribes in the north. I bet the gift-giving character of Santa Claus has no pagan predecessor either. Nope, definitely no relation to something like the Norse god Odin dispensing gifts to children on his 8-legged horse Sleipnir, who the children would leave carrots and hay for in their boots by the chimney in exchange for candy. And I don’t believe for a second that all our Christmas carols have their roots in paganism thanks to villagers going into the forest to sing songs to wake up the sleeping trees to induce the end of winter and give a bountiful spring harvest. Or Anglo-Saxons going from house to house exchanging alcoholic drinks for money. And I love putting mistletoe up in my house, and there’s no way I’ll ever believe that mistletoe had great significance for fertility, love, and peace in the pre-Christian world ranging from Rome all the way to the Norse druids and Celts. And I always make sure to put up holly and wreaths on all my doors the day after Thanksgiving. There’s no way that’s a custom that was appropriated from Rome’s Saturnalia! Yep, Christmas must be the most original holiday of the year. Totally sui generis! Now, if you’ll excuse me, me and my family are going to go eat a yule log. I don’t know where the word ‘yule’ comes from, but I bet it’s not pagan at all!”

Congratulations on another award-winning Christmas tree, Chris.

Submitted December 10, 2022 at 10:38PM by endoplasmiccity (From Reddit https://ift.tt/9cjf564)

[dreamlandcreations]

All's fair...

Raymond Smith x Reader

Summary: hc about starting a prank war with Ray...

Warnings: none? (maybe my poor imitation of the character would deserve a warning), part of the series of A deal is a deal but can be read on its own

• Series Masterlist •

It starts in little. With a stupid comment on your clothes. 

What was he expecting? That you were sitting at home in a 2000 dollar sweater when you didn’t plan to leave all day??? Oh, wait... *insert mental image of said overpricey sweater that compliments his hair color so perfectly* 

Anyway, you were sitting in his favourite chair and listening to the most recent problem when you noticed for the umpteenth time that he eyes you with a little glare then blinks rapidly, adjusts his glasses and goes on...

You finally snap and interrupt him, asking what’s his problem. That’s when he makes the comment and educates you about proper attire.

The others in the room expect your usual bickering to start but to everyone’s surprise you just level him with an exasperated look that says: really?

Retaliation comes a few weeks later, on Halloween. You walk into the pub and Bunny almost chokes on his healthy smoothie when he sees what you are wearing. A three piece suit, glasses and shoes that match his outfit exactly.

When Ray looks up at you, you swear you can hear how the never slowing down gears in his head stop working but he recovers too quickly.

“And who are you supposed to be?” He can’t hide the irritation as he tries to poke you so you flash him a delighted smile before you mimic his angry expression.

“Stop fucking around, cunt.”

“I don’t sound like that.” He gives you an unimpressed look but the corner of his mouth twitches slightly. You smirk at him and after a ‘sure’ you get back to business. 

You don’t expect him to engage in this play so your jaw kind of hits the floor when you see a beautiful dress hanging from your wardrobe door with a note that says:

“If you want to dress properly sometime. - R.”

And you laugh when you look into the wardrobe to see all your clothes gone and replaced with identical to some of his, in your size.

The next day you let yourself into his house while he is working and rearrange his books in the living room and also hide some of them. 

You thought about doing something more crazy, like replacing all his furnitures or his kitchen stuff but you concluded that he would be too bothered by that to let it go and you wouldn’t want him to have a sleepless night from his OCD. So, you also leave a note for him: 

“If you are having a hard time, say please and I’ll tell you the magic key.” You don’t sign it but wrote the note on the back side of a polaroid picture.

The picture is of you in that ridiculously expensive dress he got you.

At two in the morning you get a short text saying ‘Please’

You feel kinda bad and tell him the system which you misplaced his book by and make your way to his place to help get them in order.

That’s the first time you sleep in his bed. You wake up to the feeling of his fingers brushing out the hair from your face and you feel him press a gentle kiss to your forehead. You get out of his house while he showers and don’t mention the incident again for a long while.

The next time you have to leave the country for your legal business he changes your first class ticket to economy. 

It’s more than a 15-hour-flight. So, while you find it amusing, you also want to kill him after the fist half an hour.

As soon as you land you text Bunny to remind him that Ray’s car needs to get it’s annual check up. You arrange it that the replacement car is a hot pink mustang.

Bunny picks you up at the airport when you get back. A gift box is waiting for you on the backseat.

Opening it, you find a tiny Doberman puppy in it with a bow on his collar and a note tangling from the side of the box:

“I’m sure he's not as snappy as you but you can finally get a sign at your door to warn people because they might get bitten if they venture in.” 

You know he did his research on you. He knows you are allergic and he also knows you wanted to have a pet since you were a child so you wouldn’t be able to give up on it. 

It was kinda sweet, actually. In a diabolical, Ray-way.

You get some allergy meds and suck it up, even though you hate the thought of dog hair everywhere. (Which gives you an idea for a few other comebacks.)

You name the puppy Mr Smith. 

When Ray gives you that look, you tell him it’s from the Matrix. 

He starts to argue with you that it should be Agent Smith then and you lose your shit over finding out what a nerd he is and you don’t hesitate to tease him for it. 

He tries to reason that if you know all that, then you are a nerd. You just shrug and say ‘yeah’. He huffs at you and gives up on the conversation. But that’s how your movie nights start.

Once you got Mr Smith trained, you let him loose in Ray’s bedroom. 

Around midnight he shows up at your door. The puppy in his hand chose that moment to lick at his face and you can’t help the little huff of a laugh that escapes you.

“Sorry?” 

He doesn’t say anything just gives you Mr Smith and makes his way to your bedroom with what awfully seems like an overnight bag.

You blink after him and follow as soon as you come to your senses.

Ray is already in your bed and seems to be deep in sleep. He took off his shoes but his glasses are still on, so you carefully place them on your nightstand and lay down after you switched off the lights.

That morning is the first time you wake up in his arms. He wakes when you try to move out of his hold, then he pulls you impossibly closer, murmuring your name and a ‘go back to sleep’ before he nuzzles your neck and you can’t help but wonder how it would be like to have this every day.

• Series Masterlist • 

[oneoftheextras]

Day 27 | Jean Kirstein | Kinktober 2021

kinktober 2021 masterlist

27th October - Somnophilla

paring: jean kirstein x f!reader

summary: you pass out at jean’s party, but he takes care of you a little too well

words: 1.3k

warnings: no spoilers for any season, 18+, smut, non-con, alcohol, somnophilla (duh), modern au, oral (f recieving)

← day 26 | brat taming | toshinori yagi         day 28 | hands | megumi fushiguro→

He knew this was wrong, he could feel the pang of guilt pulling at his heartstrings but he had held on for as long as he could.

Jean thought he was a good man, a good friend with a good moral compass but that all went out the window when it came to you.

You were his weakness and almost everyone but you knew it.

When you’d turned up to the party dressed as a slutty nurse he had to put a hand in his pocket to rearrange himself. It was like you knew exactly what you were doing but feigned innocence. 

Dressing as a demon was the perfect juxtaposition for you.

The only downside was that you arrived with Reiner, your so called ‘best friend’ that definitely had a thing for you. Even if you were oblivious, Jean noticed how Reiner would look down your top at any moment you weren’t paying attention.

It made Jean’s blood boil when he saw the larger man place a hand on your hip and you laugh into his side, a drink already in your hand - that should’ve been him next to you not Braun.

He knew you were a lightweight, that’s why he kept handing you a drink the moment your cup was empty. Reiner had finally left your side to go and play beer pong with Bertoldt and Jean saw that as his opportunity to give you shots.

Never one to turn down a drink that was so thoughtfully poured for you, you tipped back every shot of tequila Jean gave you.

Soon enough, Reiner returned giving Jean a cold stare from how your drunken form had shuffled closer to him. 

Best friend my ass!

Jean took the hint and made himself scarce, he’d mingle and drink with some of his friends and wait for the right time.

When he overheard Reiner grumbling to Porco about how much of mess you were, he knew that was his queue.

What he didn’t expect was to find you completely unconscious on his couch with a few people sat around you making feeble attempts at waking you up. The fact that Reiner up and left you when you passed out on him did nothing to quell the burning hatred he had for the man.

“Hey, is she okay?” he asked Ymir who was watching Historia gently pat your face, “Drank too much,” Ymir shrugged as she sipped her own drink.

“Let me,” Jean tapped Historia and signalled for her to get out of the way and let him pick you up, “Where are you taking her?” Historia asked, face full of concern, “I’ve got some spare rooms upstairs, it’s better than her lying down here,” he carefully rested your head on his chest and stood upright, ready to take you upstairs.

“Make sure she doesn’t lay on her back!” Historia called after him as Jean carried you away from the rest of the party. Having the annual Halloween Bash at his house had turned out in his favour.

He only wanted to be alone with you, that was his intentions originally. He laid you down on the bed and took in your peaceful features, the way your chest rose and fell softly, he couldn’t help himself.

The costume you were wearing was fairly skimpy anyway, but the tiny skirt you were wearing was ruffled upwards around your hips - it wasn’t his doing, that’s just how it fell when he laid you down.

What would one little peek do? As long as he was quick, no one would know but he could keep the image locked away in his mind until you were finally his. He was sure you would be together eventually anyway so what was the harm in seeing something you were going to show him anyway?

A glance towards the door to ensure it was shut tight was the last part of his sanity left, he wasted no time pushing your panties to the side so he could see you in all your glory, his lips watered at the sight.

One taste wouldn’t hurt, right? He lowered his head to your folds and run his tongue across your lips. The moment your flavour landed on his taste buds he knew he was doomed; it was as though he’d had a sample and now needed the whole meal.

His tongue went faster and deeper, feeling the way you fluttered around him in your sleepy state, he wondered what you would feel like around his cock if you gave him the chance.

Just as he was pushing that thought out of his head a moan crawled its way out of your throat and between your lips. 

Jean removed his tongue from you and froze, staring at your sleeping face with your wetness coating his lips and chin, you hadn’t woken up but his dick had.

He’d gone this far, surely there was no turning back for him now. He needed to feel you around him, do what Reiner was so desperately trying to do before you gave the blonde a chance.

Before he knew what he was doing he was pushing his rock hard length into your hole slowly, he didn’t want to wake you up when you looked so beautiful while you were asleep after all.

Small whimpers left you as he bottomed out with a quiet groan, you had to stop making those sounds or he wouldn’t be able to control himself, it took everything in him not to pound you into the mattress, but he knew there would be another time when you would let him do exactly that.

He pulled himself almost all the way out, letting the ridges of his cock drag against your soft walls, he couldn’t hold it for long before he was pushing back in again.

His jaw was clenched tightly and his fingers curled into the covers of the bed, he wanted to hold onto your thighs but he knew that he’d leave bruises if he did and that wouldn’t be very gentlemanly of him.

“Oh fuck!” he sighed as he attempted to pick his pace up. Unconsciously, you’d gotten extremely wet, your body betraying you and taking Jean’s side in this act, but it meant that he could slide in and out of you fairly easily without disturbing you too much.

He just had to control his force, he wanted to slam his hips against yours and make you feel like he was splitting you in half but he settled for gently tapping his pubic bone against yours and hearing a muffled whine come from you.

He loved the fact he was making you feel good, even if you didn’t know it, he hoped you would wake up feeling satisfied. If psychology was on his side, then you’d associate that satisfied feeling with him when you woke up in his house the next morning.

You started to tighten around him and his legs started to shake, he stared down at where the two of you were joined and watched himself disappear inside of you, he was close but he couldn’t cum in you that would be too obvious.

He also didn’t want you to cum too hard either in case it woke you up, so he maintained his pace until he felt your walls spasm around him and his pubic hair get significantly damper.

He held on until the very last second, pulling out and cumming over your exposed thigh. It wasn’t exactly what he wanted but it would have to do for now.

Reaching for the box of tissues across the room, he hurriedly cleaned you up as best he could and replaced your underwear - turning you onto your side and propping a pillow against your back so you couldn’t roll over and choke yourself.

The next morning you woke up with a hangover and a strange sensation in your core. Jean offered to make you breakfast while he handed you some painkillers and a glass of water - you couldn’t help your lingering stare on his face as he cooked breakfast.

@mylife-demonstrates-murphys-law @hereticpriest @enagmaticether @anxiousgoddest @kodzu-ken @moonnei @diesinspanishbcimhispanic  @fvckmeupyoonz @homosexualjohnwayne @notplutos @moth-baybee @answer-the-sirens @ochakoakabane

[cades-outsider]

Johnny Cade X Reader *SMUT*

Warnings: Your first time with Johnny Cade

Irresistible

The feeling of Johnny's touch always lingered on your skin, his burning touch sent sensations that ran through your veins in such a way. It left goosebumps on your skin, the kind of goosebumps that only Johnny could give you.

  The sensation was almost like nothing you had ever felt before, his touch only ever made your skin burn with anticipation in the best way possible. It made your heart race ten times the normal speed.

  Your pupils would dilate times ten, so much so that your eyes would cloud up with love and lust only towards Johnny. Your cheeks would brighten from the inside effect he could cause. Your chest would tighten from anticipation and excitement. Every part of you felt like it was on fire just by Johnny lightly caressing your skin.

  You didn't know this, but your touch did the exact same for Johnny Cade. His moans and drawn out whimpers would let anyone know how desperate he was for your touch. The same tingling sensation would run through his veins causing him to let out a strain of moans from the contact of just your finger tips or your lips in contact with the sensitive skin on his neck.

You and Johnny had never had sex before, the farthest you both had went were intimate make outs. You hadn't even seen each other naked yet, for Johnny the farthest he's ever went was sliding his hands under your shirt and resting them on yours hips; not wanting to go any further incase you go uncomfortable.

  For you the farthest you went with Johnny was grinding against him, Johnny was to shy to ask for anything and he was to shy to do something about it. He didn't want to go over boundaries, and sometimes he was too afraid to ask so you both would just end the make out with slow pecks and hand movements.

  Neither you or Johnny were experienced, so when it finally did happen it would be both of your firsts. The Curtis's were having a family dinner with the whole gang, and being apart of the gang with Johnny they insisted you both came and stayed for their annual family dinner.

  Johnny agreed but only if you were going, you agreed as well wanting to spend time with your second family. Well technically they would be more like your first since you barley seen your real family, they were always gone on job trips or vacation. You were happy that they didn't drag you alone to say the least, that meant you got to spend extra time with Johnny.

  The times your parents weren't home which would usually be all the time; as of now your parents were home but resting for a trip they had planned the next day ahead. During these times when your parents weren't home you would take Johnny in and let him stay with you, you'd feed him, let him take showers, wash his clothes, and let him sleep in your room with you with the price of cuddles of course.

Both you and Johnny entered the Curtis's cozy home, everyone greeted you both with warm welcoming smiles and greetings. As always Darry came out of the kitchen wearing an old apron, drying his wet hands on the apron that rested around his waist as he let out a warm smile "make yourselves' at home" He tilts his head to the unoccupied couch.

You grabbed Johnny's hand with a warm smile and walked over to the couch, after greeting everyone yourselves you and Johnny take a seat close by. The room was always a bit tight considering there was only two rocking chairs, a love seat that could hold four people and a coffee table.

You sat closer to the arm of the couch, Johnny sitting so close to you your arms and legs were touching. Not that you minded, but his touch always just seemed to make your body light up in flames. A small blush covers your cheeks as the small sounds of Mickey Mouse playing ignited the room.

Two-bit sat on the floor as always, with a whole chocolate cake also not surprisingly; he always spoiled his dinner first as Darry would like to call it. You interlocked you and Johnny's hand together, resting both your intwined hands on the middle of your leg but still super close to your thigh.

Your exposed legs and his touch only made your skin burn more with anticipation, you decided it would be a good day to wear your flowered skirt that went just past your mid thigh. Since it was a hot and sunny day out, you also matched it with a black tank top that had a string tied in the middle way of your chest, with your worn out white converses.

Now you were starting to rethink the whole skirt idea, but maybe it would come in handy later on. Soon Dallas entered the house and all of a sudden the once small, quite house was now full of laughter and small talk.

Soon dinner was ready and Darry was calling everybody in the kitchen, Pony boy was setting the plates and silverware. Steve grabbed a few extra chairs for everyone and made room at the table, Darry had made his famous mash potatoes, steak, and vegetables; everyone's favorite.

Everyone over flooded their plates seeing as Darry made enough for three and a half families. You were seated next to Johnny on your left and Pony boy on your right. Everyone said grace before digging in and stuffing their faces with delight.

"This is really somethin' Darr" Dallas complimented with his face full, as everyone followed behind with praises and thank you's of the food.

Darry responded with a simple 'Thank you' in return before stuffing his face. Soon everyone was stuffed from the nice meal, though once Two-bit finished swallowing his last bite he sighed stuffed before standing up from his seat "I got the chocolate cake" he sates before rushing to the counter and grabbing the cake causing everyone to let out a little chuckle.

Everyone was able to eat a thin slice of chocolate cake while Two-bit on the other hand was back at his mission of sitting on the floor watching Mickey and eating the rest of the cake using his hands.

Darry collected all the empty plates and silverware before placing them in the sink, starting to wash the dishes. You kissed Johnny on the cheek and let him know you were going to help Darry with the dishes. He responded with a gentle nod before pecking your lips and taking a seat on the couch beside Dallas, Dallas immediately grabbed Johnny in a head lock and ruffled up his hair.

"Hey Darr, need some help" You offer, walking over to the sink.

"Sure Y/n, that'd be nice" He smiles moving over to let you stand by the strainer, while he washed and rinsed the dishes you dried them off with the kitchen towel given to you.

In a matter of five minutes you both had managed to finish up the dishes faster than just one person would've. Walking into the living room you take an open seat beside Johnny, resting your head on his shoulder to which Johnny lays his head against yours and snuggles into your side.

Soon the laughter and fun times ended once the sun went down and it started getting dark, you and Johnny said your goodbyes but before you could leave the porch Dallas came running over to Johnny. He tugged him away for a second before slipping something in Johnny's hands, it reflected off of the moonlight and you could tell it was a packet of some sort.

Once Johnny took a look at whatever it was he quickly shoved it in his Jean jackets pocket with an embarrassed blush covering his features "good luck" Dallas grinned, with a cheeky wink as he walked back into the house.

Johnny walked back up to you and slipped one of his hands in yours while his other rested in his pocket. It was quite chilly out, causing Johnny's small frame to shake from the cool air. You only shook once but that was enough for Johnny to pull off his jacket and drape it over your shoulders, your head snapped up to Johnny's.

"Johnny m' fine really, here" You tried to give it back to him but he refused to take it back, his small frame still shaking.

"Nah' Y/n I'm good really" He tries, but you clearly see behind his shaking features.

Grabbing Johnny's arm you lift up the jacket letting his arm slide through the collar but also draped around your shoulders, as you drape your shoulder around his letting the jacket cover his freezing frame.

You look up at Johnny, catching his loving gaze as he stares back at you. No one had ever really put him first like you have, even if he protested against something like this you always found a positive way to help the situation.

You smiled up at him shyly as you both continue to walk down the road, "wanna' come to my house?" You question.

He shakes his head "your parents' are there I wouldn't want to intrude" He says.

"You wouldn't, you never do... but how about' we go to the lot then?" You question curiously.

Johnny looks up at you "yeah, that'd be nice" He smiles small.

A couple more minutes of walking and you both arrived at the lot, the moon reflecting on the old seat car seat that you and Johnny have cuddled on many times. Johnny removes his arms from the jacket to grab his lighter and lighting a couple of dead leaves placing them on top of the wood, causing the sticks and limbs to ignite a warm fire.

  You rest your hands in Johnny's jacket pockets before feeling a sharp paper like object touch your finger pads, while Johnny was busy rearranging the limbs to keep the fire going you slipped out the golden packet from the pocket that read 'durex: one latex condom'.

  You soon heard the steering of leaves and branches come to a halt causing you to move your gaze to Johnny. His mouth was wide open and his eyes were slightly bulged open as well. There was a loud silence, the only thing that could be heard was the burning of the fire.

  You walked over to Johnny and sat down on the seat next to him, Johnny's gaze followed you as his expression never changed. "So this is what Dal' slipped you eh?" You giggle slightly, something you only found yourself doing with Johnny.

  A bright red blush covers Johnny's features as he looks down embarrassed but slowly nods, confirming it was in fact what Dal had slipped him.

  You lift his head up with your pointer finger, your eyes meeting once against you raise one of your legs and place it on the other side of Johnny now fully straddling his waist.

  Johnny gulps nervously as your body's continue to touch each other's, you gently caress Johnny's arm with the pads of your fingers causing goosebumps to ride down his spine. He continues to watch your every move, studying your features like none before.

  "Johnny I'm ready" You mumble softly, looking into his soft brown orbs.

  "Wait. Are you sure?" He mumbles resting his hands just above your hips.

  "Yes, are you ready?" You question softly.

  "I am" He gives consent, a small blush forming across his cheeks due to this conversation.

  He was terrified, what if's kept running through his mind 'what if you don't like it?' 'What if I'm bad?' 'What if she leaves me?'. He hadn't ever been in this position before and this meant a lot to him, because it was a sign of love for your partner and he didn't want to dis-satisfy and disappoint.

  You place your hands gently on his cheeks and bring him into a loving kiss, fireworks go off, your lips tingle against one another, slowly but surely the kiss started to heat up along with the speed.

  You were now both hungry for each other, you pulled away for air but immediately placed your lips against the sensitive skin around his neck, Johnny lowly whimpers in response as his head tilts back. You were starting to get greedy, your kisses became more desperate as did your grinding on his crotch.

  Though you kept that at bay not wanting to frighten him. Your breathing started picking up as you nipped and kissed his soft spots on his neck. Johnny felt as if he was floating with the immense pleasure and you haven't even started yet.

  You lifted your face from his neck and went back to his lips, closing the gap. You slowed down the kiss, gently you bend your head down a little and take his bottom lip in between your two lips, kissing slowly before moving to his top lip and showing all your attention there. Soon your place your lips on his, he runs his tongue under your bottom lip asking for entrance to which you allow.

  His tongue slipping into your mouth, interwinding and fighting for dominance with yours. You pull away slightly for more air, you get a good look at Johnny's eyes and see that they have darkened and lust clouds his eyes as he looks at you lovingly.

  You grind your hips against his hardening cock causing him to gasp in shock and in pleasure as he grips your hips and follows your rhythm. You close your eyes and let out a light moan from the stimulation. You never would've pictured Johnny like this, his eyes were practically begging you; speaking words he was to embarrassed to speak himself.

"Johnny..." You whisper, going back to your current position of kissing and nipping at his neck, making sure not to add noticeable loves bites.

"Y/n.. Can-can I touch you" He practically begs out.

"Yes..." You breath out, trying to maintain your breathing.

Gently he grips your hips and turns you over so he's hovering over you, his eyes pierce through your soul. You almost spill out all your dirty thoughts you've had about Johnny right then and there.

It felt like hours as Johnny's brown orbs stare into yours, when in reality it had only been a couple seconds. Everything seems to play in slo-motion as Johnny straddles your waist, knees on either side of your waist. Kneeling down so his forearms are resting beside each side of your head laying on the old seat.

Johnny peppers small kisses around your neck and under your jaw, slowly he makes it down the valley of your breast; not going any further than that he starts sucking on the sensitive skin leaving little loves bites in places that wouldn't show to much.

You run your fingers through his greasy hair, not caring that in return your hand was starting to get greasy from the intense amount of hair grease placed in his hair.

  Johnny slips his Jean jacket off your shoulders placing it on the ground next to you, he places gentle kisses all over your exposed shoulders. His hands began to shake from nervousness, this action causes you to lift Johnny's head up with your finger.

  "Johnny... are you sure you're ready?" You caress his cheek lovingly.

  He nods his head "I'm sure, are you?" He makes sure.

  "I am" You confirm, bringing him down to press a loving kiss to his chapped lips.

  He fumbles with the string of your top nervously, trying to untie it; his shaking hands not allowing him to do so. Eventually he manages to untie the bow, following with unbuttoning the rest of the buttons with a nervous struggle.

  He slips the piece of clothing off your shoulder, exposing your black bra that held a little diamond bow in the middle. You blush as Johnny stares at your chest lovingly, "Y-you're beautiful..." He gasps out.

  He doesn't give you to to thank him before placing little kisses above your breasts, gently sucking and creating little love bites causing you to let out a little moan. You tug at the hem of Johnny's black t-shirt, signaling that you wanted it off.

  Johnny stops what he's doing to lift up his shirt off of his body now showing of his tan skin. A couple scars rest on his chest and torso, you gently rub your finger pads over some of the old scars. Lifting up your body you rest on your elbows maintaining eye contact as you press a few kisses to his scars and chest causing Johnny to melt in his position.

  Johnny blushes as you lean back a little to get the whole view of your Johnny Cade, still resting on your elbows you look up at him with excited eyes. You run a finger down his chest to his stomach, stoping at the hem of his pants that held a very noticeable bulge.

  You lift yourself up, wrapping your arms around Johnny neck before bringing you both back down and pulling him into a lust filed kiss. Letting your hands wander you end up being back to the hem of his loose jeans, you let your fingers rest there for a bit as you and Johnny continue to make out.

  Soon you start to fumble with the button, then you start unzipping his jeans. You leave it at that before breaking the kiss for air. Johnny lowers his his butterfly kisses to your stomach, soon being face to face with your skirt.

  Looking you in the eyes he slips his hands in your skirt, rubbing your thighs as he does so. He grabs the edges of your underwear and tugs them down, licking his lips hungrily as he does so.

  Placing them on top of his jean jacket so they don't get dirty he spreads your legs not quite seeing your exposed core yet. "Can I taste you Y/n?" He asks innocently, his breathing picking up as he looks up at you his once light brown eyes now fully black and clouded with lust.

  You nod your head furiously your stomach tightening from excitement, lifting your skirt above your thighs your core now being exposed to Johnny. You were so into it you didn't feel embarrassed about showing him your body at all.

  He places kisses on your thighs, slowly leaning closer to the place you needed him the most. Looking up at you he wraps his lips around your clit, the feeling of his tongue causing you to gasp at the stimulation.

  He continues to swirl his tongue around your clit, flicking faster as your breathing picks up. Johnny gets more confident in his movements as he hears you moan, he speeds things up and slowly starts to add one finger into your now dripping core.

  Your eyes roll into the back of your head as he lets you adjust to one finger before slipping in two. You let out a strained whimper as his tongue continues to work on your clit and his two fingers stretching you out, getting you ready for him.

  Since this was your first time being eaten out and first time period, your climax comes closer than you would've expected. Your eyes roll back as your hips push farther into Johnny's hold, "I'm gonna cum, Johnny!" You whimper out as your high soon rolls over, causing your hips to stutter and Johnny to moan at the satisfying taste.

  He lets you ride out your high before coming back up to you, a panting mess as you try to calm yourself. Johnny's lips glisten in the moonlight as he's covered in your cum. He licks his lips and sucks off his fingers hungrily as his eyes continue to stare into yours.

  "You taste amazin'" He moans out as he presses a kiss to your lips before getting up and sitting on the other side of the seat and tugging off his jeans.

  Sitting up you wrap your legs around his waist, grinding yourself on his clothed bulge. You run your fingers down his stomach until you get to his boxers "can I?" You blush.

  Johnny nods shyly as a blush covers his features, you tug down his boxers revealing his cock that springs out and hits his stomach. You lick your lips as you place the piece of clothing on top of the pile of clothes. You run your finger pad over the tip of his cock smearing the pre cum that rested there.

  Johnny's breathing picks up as his head falls back, his mouth falls open and his eyes screw shut; having being touched for the first time. Getting more confident you grab his length and start to stoke his cock in up and down motions, slowly since he was sensitive.

  Small moans fall out of Johnny's pink lips, your mouth falls open as you look up at Johnny, his moans turning you on even more. "Oh my..." you mumble lowly, as you continue to stoke his length.

  Grabbing the condom that sat beside you, you slow down your motions before stopping causing Johnny to look back up at you. You gently open the packet to the condom, sliding out the lubricated latex. Flipping it to the right side you place the condom on the tip of Johnny's cock before sliding it down correctly.

  Johnny watches in amazement as you adjust the condom on his length, you press a loving kiss to his jaw before gazing into his brown orbs "are you ready?" You question, caressing his redden cheek.

Johnny nods furiously as he places his hands above your hips, shakily. Lining up his cock with your entrance, you start to slide down his cock. Your tight walls closing on around Johnny's length, it didn't really hurt as he slipped in your walls but more so stung a bit. It was a very tight fit as you continue to slide down further on his harden cock.

Johnny's eyes slam shut at the tight fit around his length, his breathing picked up as his cheeks reddened along with the tip of his nose. His stomach heaved up and down from your walls closing in on him, his hips stuttered from him being so sensitive but he maintained them as best as he could until you were ready to speed up.

  Soon your walls started to get used to Johnny's cock allowing you to speed up your actions, your head rolls back as your chest arches from the stimulation. Just now realizing you weren't completely naked since your bra was still connected to your body, you continue riding Johnny at a medium speed whilst reaching your hands behind your bra strap and unclipping it.

  Throwing your bra to the other side finally freeing your breasts, Johnny's eyes widen at the skin burning sight. He looks up with his doe brown eyes, asking to touch you. You nod as you continue to ride Johnny, your boobs bouncing as you do so. Johnny's eyes fall back on your perky breasts before letting his hand trail up from your waist and stomach to your boobs, lightly twisting your harden nipple causing you to moan and roll your hips.

  "Oh Y/n~" He all but whimpers as his hands continue to rest on your chest, Johnny throws his head back, mouth gape open, eyes shut as you feel his cock reach your sweet spot.  

  "Oh my, Johnny" You moan out, skin slapping together as you ignore the burning sensation in your thighs.

  Johnny lifts up and wraps his arms around your waist, pulling your heated body closer to his as your motions speed up. Your hands fall to his neck, playing with the little hairs that rested there. His head rests on your chest, his breathing constantly heaving as he feels the burning sensation in his abdomen.

  He lets out a muffled whimper against your skin as his cock continues to reach a point past your sweet spot and your walls clench around him greedily. You swirl your hips around his causing Johnny to gasp, "do t-that again' p-please" he begs out, squeezing his eyes closed.

  You continue to swirl your hips around his length feeling that same burning sensation in your abdomen. You speed up your actions, ready to reach that point. Johnny places his lips against yours for support as he feels his body shaking from anticipation and also chasing his high.

  His hips stutter upwards causing his cock to be buried deeper inside your walls. You moan out into the silent night as your motions only increase, "y/n... I'm gonna' cum" Johnny warns as his breath catches in his throat, you nod your head in agreement.

  With one final thrust Johnny cum's in the condom, you're able to feel the warm cum inside you from the thin latex that was preventing him from spilling inside you, that set off your orgasm as you start to cum around his cock. Your hips stutter along with Johnny's creating more friction against your sensitive core.

  Once both your highs decrease you slow your movements, not quite quitting as you press a loving kiss to Johnny's lips. He accepts the kiss, only becoming more needy as you run your hands through his hair.

  You pull away gently before gazing into Johnny's loving orbs, "that was amazin' Y/n..." he gasps out as you agree, slowing sliding off his cock slowly causing you both to whimper as Johnny's hips stutter in the air.

   Before Johnny could slip the condom off you take action and began slowly slipping it off for him and tying it before discarding of the latex in the trash can beside the seat.

  You slip on your tank top, not bothering to put your uncomfortable bra on as you hand Johnny his boxer and jeans. Johnny slips on his clothes the same time you do.

  Johnny looks at you lovingly as you finish up the buttons on your tank top, half your chest still exposed until you finish buttoning the last button.

  You glance at Johnny to see him staring at you, "what?" You smile bashfully.

  "You're just'... beautiful" He admires you as you crawl over to him and cuddle into his side, taking his Jean jacket and covering you both up with it.

  "That was really breath takin' Johnny" You giggle slightly as you shyly look into his puppy eyes.

  Johnny smiles as a blush covers his features "i love you Y/n" Johnny admits as he cuddles into your side.

"I love you Johnny" You smile as you both stare at the burning fire, soon your breathing lured Johnny into a restful and deep sleep, you soon following behind moments latter.

_______________________________________________

Requested from Wattpad!!!

[trashmouthkid]

The lights are dim. The television is still on, volume low, and Eddie calls out from the living room into the kitchen, the way he always does with Richie when he knows he won’t be able to start a conversation to his face.

“So,” he calls from that safe distance, collecting their dirty dishes and glasses from the coffee table, not coming in until he hears Richie give a shoot in response. In the kitchen, he lingers by the doorway, watching Richie rinse silverware under the sink faucet, back hunched to him. Part of Eddie still needs him to not turn around. “What was Stan talking about earlier? With you and Bill?” 

There’s a pause, before Richie drops whatever he was scrubbing into the soapy dishwater and puts his hands up.

“Officer, I swear,” he says, voice a deep, New Jersey belonging. He turns around. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Eddie closes his eyes and fights the urge to bury his face in his hands. “Richie.”

Slowly, Richie’s hands drop. He shrugs. “Back in college, when we roomed with each other for a couple semesters.” He wrinkles his nose and turns back around, like he can’t face Eddie either. “We hooked up sometimes.”

It’s what Eddie is expecting him to say, and still his breath is caught in his lungs, and he can’t find a voice to respond with. His brain is preoccupied rearranging the dynamic of their friend group against his own wishes, as the silence stretches on until Richie seems to get frustrated with it. He turns the faucet on and starts scrubbing again.

“Look, it’s not a big deal, Eddie. We were nineteen, both single…had a whole living space to ourselves. It was just easy.”

Eddie still can’t get his mouth to work—to explain that that is exactly why it’s a big deal. As he stands in the doorway of their shared living space. Both of them single.

“Are you gonna bring those plates over, or are you practicing for the annual tableau vivant?”

“How come you’ve never tried to hook up with me?”

Richie makes a weird, strangled noise. “I beg your pardon?”

“Sorry,” Eddie says quickly, face heating. He finally steps into the kitchen and brings their dishes over to Richie, who’s twisted around to look at him strangely. “But like. We live together.  We’re both single.”

He reaches around Richie to dump the dishes into the sink while Richie blinks down at him. His glasses are a little smudged, a little fogged up from the running water. His t-shirt has a streak of wet where it was pressed up against the counter. Eddie wonders what it must be like for anyone who ever gets to just…kiss him, whenever they want. No question marks, no hesitations, just because they can. Is, not for the first time, jealous of these imaginary people—and Bill now, just a little bit, for even having the memory.

“Do you want me to put the moves on you or something?” Richie sounds somewhat incredulous, and Eddie lets a harsh breath out through his nose.

“I just want to know why,” he says, “you’ve never thought about it. Like, what is it about me?”

“Okay, sure.” Richie crosses his arms. Looks him up and down and shrugs innocently. “You’re just not my type.”

Eddie…knows he’s joking. He knows that he is. But his body, the way it bristles, embarrassed, defensive, does not. It goes on without him.

“Bullshit, I’m not your type.” Richie tries to turn back to the sink and Eddie stops him. “Bullshit. Do you know how many times a week I have to sit across from myself at the breakfast table?”

Richie is already still, but Eddie sees his whole body go rigid when he says it. Eddie furrows his brows.

“I just want to know,” he repeats, quieter.

And he knows he’s being stupid. Stupid for asking, stupid for pushing. Things like this don’t need reasons, and they don’t always get them either. Sometimes, they just are. But Eddie doesn’t know what to do with things that just are.

Richie seems to recover after a beat or two of thought, and takes a deep breath.

“You clearly don’t,” he says. “Or you would have figured it out by now.”

Eddie scrunches his face up. What was that supposed to mean? Then he just sighs, shoulders slumping.

“Just spit it out, Rich,” he begs. “If it was so easy with Bill.”

“Oh my god.” Richie scrubs a hand over his face and looks up. “He’s going to make me say it,” he tells the ceiling.

“Richie.”

“I can’t.” When Richie looks down at him again, he is stripped bare of all his teasing. He looks a little broken, without the crutch of it. “Eddie, I can’t. Because it would mean something else, with you.”

He’s sorry—in his eyes, in the pout of his lips—and Eddie feels his breath catch in his lungs again, but it’s not the same. He thinks this and he thinks that, and suddenly he does not want to think so hard about it anymore.

“Okay,” he breathes, and slowly reaches out to Richie’s chest. “Can you let it be? Something else, I mean.”

His hand comes down to fist the hem of his t-shirt, pinching it to the wet spot in his closed fingers. Richie looks like he can’t move, or like he doesn’t know if he’s allowed to. “Eddie—” he tries weakly, startled.

Eddie maneuvers them with gentle caution, turning so his back is to the counter, tugging Richie as close as he’ll allow. He comes, but grabs onto the cabinets above them like he needs to brace himself. He is so close, Eddie can feel the warmth of him. Can feel the way he’s shaking when his fingertips brush the skin above his jeans.

“Please don’t make me make the first move.”

He’s not sure if that’s what does it for Richie, or if his resolve simply fizzles out in the heat between their bodies, but. He is falling downward, and Eddie is reaching upwards, and they meet—clash—melt in the middle. And there will be no telling ten minutes from now or ten years from now, who made the first move.

[lucyintheskywithxanax]

My Silver Screen, My Misery, My Love, My Defeat

Pairing: Billie Dean Howard x Fem Reader

A/N: I’ve been wanting to write something with Billie Dean for so long but didn’t know where to start. This lady intimidates me. I don’t know what this fic is worth, and I’m so nervous about posting it - I know it’s not particularly nice, but it’s the most personal fic I ever wrote so please be kind. 

Title is from “Pacific Coast Highway In The Movies” by AWOLNATION. This song haunts me. x

Word count: ~ 3 000

“Dear me when will my life begin?” you sighed dramatically as you gathered your things.

“Bitch, I never want to see you again,” your boss growled, pointing an angry finger at you.

“Goodbye, asshole!” you called over your shoulder as you walked out of the room.

You had never cared about that job. You didn’t seem to be able to care about anything at all. You were so bored.

Real life lacked passion and colours. You were constantly hungry for a sense of wonderment. No emotion was worth feeling if it wasn’t extreme. You wanted to know how it felt to love so deeply you would faint in the dining room like the heroines of old, drive your car off a cliff, smash the heads of your lover’s suitors. When had the world and love become so boring?

You had come to believe you would never be able to fall in love with anyone. Fiction had ruined your life. You wanted beauty, you wanted glamour, you wanted passion and murder, tears shed under the stars, diamonds on the bed. You wanted a lover who would come down the stairs in a white silk gown with lace as the music and the lighting made love to her. Cherry pink lips and wavy hair, glitter in her eyes. How could anyone settle for less?

You walked into the bright sunlight and let the flow of pedestrians sweep you away.

**

You scanned the press room and sighed. Bored, you were so bored. Luckily the couches were comfortable, and the tea was good.

You worked for the local newspaper – nothing serious, nothing you were passionate about, but you had been struggling to make ends meet. You and another journalist were covering an annual festival celebrating “everything mystical and magical!” Bollocks, as far as you were concerned. But you loved festivals, you always had. There was something almost surreal about them, how time seemed to slow down, and space to narrow. A bubble would form, a dome, a world only a few were let in. Real life would stop for a while, and you loved that, because real life was boring.

The press secretary – Leo? Theo? who cared; he was uninteresting and badly dressed – waved at you from across the room. “She’s here,” he mouthed, meaning the medium you were to interview. You gave him a thumbs-up and sighed as soon as he turned his back to you. Notebook, pen, Dictaphone. Cup of tea - empty. Another sigh. You signaled to the old lady behind the counter at the far end of the room for another cup. She pretended not to see you.  

“Asshole,” you muttered between gritted teeth. Someone on the couch next to yours – Steve? Pete? he had introduced himself the day before, he worked for a national TV channel, you couldn’t remember which one – laughed loudly at something someone else had said.

Your attention was suddenly drawn to the door. The press secretary was ushering a group of people in: a young man wearing jeans, a girl clutching files to her chest, a woman who walked in as if she owned the place, high-heels clicking, smile flashing.

Out of the corner of your eye you saw Pete (Steve?) point at her. “Man, that’s Billie Dean Howard,” he said in a breath.

“Who?” asked his companion.

“Oi, Miss Howard!” someone called – a photographer, jumping to his feet with his camera in his hands.

She glanced at him, offered him a polite smile; tilted her head on one side as she took a pose.

You gazed at her.

“Make sure the lighting is good,” she told the photographer.

The young man in jeans was buzzing around her, almost shoving a notebook into her face, muttering something about a timetable and how they were running out of time. She leaned away from him, holding out a perfectly manicured hand – pale pink acrylics, thin silver rings – to bat the notebook away. You saw her mouth twist in an annoyed kind of way, and then the press secretary nodded at you, and she turned, and her eyes met yours.

Her brow pushed up as a smug smile crept up her lips – plump, glittery beige lipstick. “Are you here for me, babydoll?” she called.

And just like that you were done for. For the stars were singing, and your heart was finally. Admiring. Entranced. Alive.

Oh thank all the freaking Gods, she had finally come.

**

You turned on the Dictaphone and grabbed your pen. Your hands were sweating.

“Ur,” you said. Billie Dean crossed her legs and folded her hands on her knee, smiling.

You had prepared for this interview, vaguely, but she had stolen all the words from you. Kidnap me, was what you wished to tell her. Ravish me. Take me away with you from this grey world and fill my mind and heart with wonderment. Make me your co-star.

“So, what do you think of the city so far?” was what came out of your mouth. You could have died of embarrassment.

Fortunately for you, Billie Dean loved to talk about herself, so you didn’t have to rack your brain for interesting questions.

You told her you had waited for her your whole life. You told her you meant it. She looked genuinely surprised, but then she smiled, a smile that seemed to suggest she had already forgiven you for that mistake. You realized that, probably, your passionate childishness was very funny to her, as were all those who had succumbed to it before you.

“The scariest spirit I’ve ever met?” She leant back on the couch, eyes staring up at the ceiling, lips curling into a smile. “I don’t get scared easily,” she quipped, and her smile turned into a smirk.

“Are you planning on staying here long?”

Her eyes sparkled. “Depends if I can find a cozy bed to sleep in and a pretty girl to smooch.”

Damn her, damn her – you were about to lean in and kiss that smug smile off her lips when the press secretary – damn him, damn him – appeared out of nowhere as in an uninspired script, squeaking “Time’s up!” as if time mattered, as if time hadn’t stopped the minute you had met Billie Dean’s eyes.

The young man in jeans pressed a cup of coffee into Billie’s hands. “Cathy’s waiting for you in the VIP room,” he said nervously. He glanced at you over the rim of his glasses. “You’re done here?”

“I – “You cleared your throat. Billie Dean was standing up, rearranging her hair, ready to leave, ready to forget already –

“You’ll have us read that article before you publish it, alright?” the young man was saying.

“Oh whatever happened to the freedom of the press,” Billie retorted. Her eyes flicked to you. “Don’t mind him.”

“I have a very cozy bed,” you heard yourself say.

For a second or two, you could have heard a pin drop.

**

Billie held your face between her hands as if you were made of porcelain, the first time she kissed you. You gazed into her eyes as if you were dreaming. “Who are you?” you whispered.

She laughed indulgently. “Don’t forget to breathe, darling.”

A breath in. She smelt of cigarette smoke and sage and something else, something like… you didn’t know. There was no word for it. She smelt like Billie Dean Howard, medium to the stars.

**

Billie Dean raised a toast to you and to the sun and said she couldn’t possibly live without either of you. You scoffed, rolled your eyes at her as if that wasn’t the kindest thing anyone had ever said to you. She noticed your reddening cheeks, and let out a chuckle.

“What? It’s a sunburn,” you lied, fighting a smile.  

The midday summer sun was beating down on the Mediterranean, a soft breeze blowing and carrying the scent of the sea. You were spending the week in Monaco, a gift from Billie for your first anniversary. You closed your eyes, breathed in happily. The waiter brought your order, a bistro salad with warm goat cheese on toast for you, a slice of salmon and French fries for Billie. She flashed a smile at him, and his eyes sparkled.

“He’s in love,” you teased, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.

“With me?” Billie assumed an innocent expression. “Why, I could not possibly believe that.”

You scoffed again. She smiled, pinched a thick slice of lemon between her thumb and index.

“We should come here every summer,” she said in a singsong, drizzling lemon juice over the salmon. “I love it here.”

“Ghost-free?”

She laughed. “I wish. But you look so beautiful with that sunburn.”Her eyes glanced up at you mischievously; you cleared your throat. She smirked, put the slice of lemon on the side of her plate, dried her fingers with her napkin.

“You and I, lost in a foreign country,” she said.

“Luckily for you, I took French lessons in college.”

“Oh is that so?” Under the table, Billie rubbed her bare foot up and down your leg. “And how do you say ‘kiss me’ in French?”

You leaned towards her, beaming. Your gaze flicked to her lips. “Embrasse-moi.”

“Atta girl.”

She took your breath away, every day. You bent over the table, meeting her lips halfway, smiling into the kiss.

**

“I love you,” she whispered. Her eyes smiled. “Forever.”

You pressed the pad of your thumb against her brow. “Um, you can’t know that.”

“Know that I love you?”

“Know that it’ll last forever. Nothing lasts forever.”

She pouted, shifted slightly on the bed. Your thumb slid on her skin. The light streaming through the windows splashed the walls of the hotel room yellow.

“Don’t be so mean at 8 in the morning,” she whined.

You rolled your eyes at her, planted a kiss on her lips. Her skin was hot and clammy. You nuzzled your nose in her neck, blew some air to tickle her. She raised one hand to fan herself – coral acrylics, no rings.

“Call room service,” she said, stretching lazily. “I want some ice cream.”

You snorted.“Ice cream for breakfast?”

“It’s too hot.”

You reached out for the telephone and sat up, making sure your bare breasts were exposed. “Lemon?” you asked Billie. She nodded, gaze on your chest. You made a face. “I don’t understand how you can stand the taste of lemon, it’s so sour – oh, hello. Yes, could we get some lemon ice cream, please? Ice cream, yes. Room 108. And you know what, a bottle of champagne as well. Yes.” You grinned at Billie, who, face half buried in her pillow, was laughing happily. “Thank you. Muchas gracias. Yes. Bye!”

**

“Miss Howard, please.”

“Oh babe, call me Billie.”

“A little further to the left, please Billie.”

“Who’s that with you, miss Billie?”

“Be a doll and fetch me my shawl, will you darling?”

The girl – Lucy? Lily? – nodded in awe and hurried off.

“A little further to the left, Billie.”

Someone turned on a projector. You squinted, gave Billie’s hand a squeeze.

“Miss Billie, who’s that charming young woman with you? Is she your date? Miss Billie, who’s –“

Camera flashes, everywhere. You felt Billie’s lips, feather-light, brush your ear. “Relax,” she whispered. “You look beautiful.”

All around you, you could make out dark shapes, nondescript, unimportant. Spectators of the show. Come to see her, come to see you.

“Miss Billie who’s that charming –“

“Paws off!” Billie laughed. She pulled you closer, hip bumping yours. “She’s all mine, gentlemen.”

You beamed at her, brighter than the projector. Camera flashes, everywhere. To capture the moment when Billie nipped your ear lobe and you threw back your head to laugh, one hand on her arm, in love, so in love.

**

“So what are we doing this weekend?”

You glanced up at her. “Aren’t you busy this weekend?”

Billie flashed you a smile as she sat down on the couch beside you. She laid one hand on your bare thigh, nails gently grazing. “Production’s delayed. I’m all yours.”

With a wince you removed her hand from your thigh. “I’m sweating,” you whined.

Her smile faltered, just a bit. “Aren’t you happy?”she asked. And then she relaxed and shook her head. “Oh, I’m stupid. You made other plans.”

“I’ve nothing to do at all.” You stretched and winced again. “I don’t know. I’m so bored.”

**

It happened again. And again.

You caught yourself looking at other faces in the crowd. No one held a candle to Billie Dean, you knew that. But still. You scanned the crowd.

You pretended not to notice when Billie held out a hand for you to hold.

**

The glamour was fading. The twinkle of the stars was being swallowed up by the morning light.

You had once visited a house. The wallpaper was peeling off, leaving ugly streaks of dirty grey or brown. The landlady’s nail polish was chipped.  

**

Billie’s eyes were wide and rimmed red. You had never seen her look so sad.

“Wait,” she pleaded, her fingers – pale pink acrylics, vintage ring with a red stone – closing around your wrist to hold you back. “Surely we can talk – “She tried to smile, but it looked too broken, too scared.

“There’s nothing to talk about, Billie,” you said, avoiding her gaze. You hesitated. “I’m sorry. I really am.”

Her face fell. “But surely – “

“Are you here for me, babydoll?”

Her teeth sank into her lower lip and a tear rolled down her cheek, but you didn’t wipe it as you usually would. For this was how things always went. People left each other. Staying alive meant getting bored of the people you once loved. The credits roll. The movie ends.

You planted one last kiss on her lips as a sob pushed out of your throat. “Gosh but I loved you so much,” you cried. “I hadn’t been alive before you came. You taught me how to love and now I’ve died again and I’m lost without you. I’m forever lost without my love for you.”

You kept one of her scarves. It still smelt of cigarette smoke and sage and that something else – Billie Dean Howard, medium to the stars.

**

Colours faded to grey. You sank back into routine. Monotonous. Soporific. Boring. So very boring.

A year ago you would have expected the world to stop turning the minute you walked out of Billie Dean’s life. It didn’t. Days followed days, a succession of yesterdays and todays and tomorrows. Life went on, mocking you.

**

The smell of salmon filled the kitchen as you dropped the thick slices onto the burning pan. You smiled as Julie – a one-night stand that somehow had become more – made an appreciative noise. She was sprawled on the sofa, watching TV lazily, muttering “Boring” every time she changed the channel.

“Boring,” – another channel, “Boring,” – another channel, “Bo – oh hello there! Y/N, look, I spot a milf!”

You looked up as the anchorman’s face twisted into a fawning smile. “I’ve got Muriel here on the phone, from Portland, Oregon. Muriel sounds pretty worried. She wants to know if ghosts stay forever as ghosts or if they ever get to find peace.”

The camera cut to his guest – coral acrylics, no rings. The salmon’s grease sizzled on the pan.

“Nice pair of legs,” Julie was saying. “Come on, cameraman, don’t be shy, show us more!”

You shushed her.

“… some of them have been dead for a very long time, I’m afraid,” Billie Dean answered with an affected nod of her head.

Your eyes were wide.

“And what about love?” the anchorman asked.

Billie quirked an eyebrow. “Love?”

“Do you think it’s eternal?”

**

“I can’t believe we’re leaving tomorrow!” your friend Henry moaned drunkenly. He tapped his foot on the pavement like a pouting child. “Couldn’t we buy a house on one of those hills and live here? I wanna live here. I don’t wanna live anywhere else.”

“I know,” you giggled, pulling on his arm. The night was full of lights. You hadn’t expected less from Los Angeles. You hadn’t quite been able to find the angels in the sky, though. You kept an eye out for them.

“The world isn’t fair because we’re poor.”Henry walked up to the nearest streetlight and hugged it. “I’m staying here. I’m not leaving.”

You giggled again, stretching your arms as if you were about to break into dance. The air was warm. For the past few days your heart hadn’t been quite so sad.

A car honked nearby, making you jump, and just as you were about to curse a woman shot out of the hotel on your left in a flurry of yellow and blue and nearly smashed into you – “Shit, look where you’re go – “ – brown eyes, gaze terrified, shoes in her hands, cheeks pink and – “Billie?”

She slammed back into your life like the female protagonist of a Hitchcock movie, running from danger in the moonlight with her hair disheveled and her dress billowing in the wind.

“Billie?”

You caught hold of her wrist and tried to meet her gaze. “Are you alright? What – what happened to you? Did somebody hurt you? Are you alright?” You poured questions onto her as if you couldn’t stop. Her eyes focused on you, and she ran a hand through her hair, and let out a nervous laugh.  

And just like that you were done for. For the stars were singing, and your heart was once again. Admiring. Entranced. Alive.

**

“Never again,” Billie groaned into your mouth. She was holding your head firmly between her hands, devouring you, shivering, panting. “Don’t you dare leave me ever again.”

“I love you,” you moaned. You pushed her down on the bed, eyes flashing hungry and predatory as you took in the sight of her, all flushed and ready for you. “Forever.”

And as you dived in you could almost forget the taste of that one lie.

**

“What about love?” the anchorman asked. “Do you think it’s eternal?”

Billie’s smile faltered. “I’m not sure,” she answered slowly.

“Aw, poor chick got her heart broken,” Julie mocked.

“Lemon?” you asked her.

“Uh?”

“Should I put some lemon juice on the salmon?”

“I hope so,” Billie’s voice said. “I’m not sure – but I hope so.”