#and do things my own way without considering people being upset

[bratzboykai]

Super fucking funny that lately my mom has been remembering lil behavioral things from when I was little and then immediately being like *spaces out* "Oh wow another one of the possible autism diagnosis" IAJEJRKTKTKTKFKKD

[ranger-danger]

I’m going to ramble in the tags about good characterization so bear with me.

[hard-core-super-star]

i touched you for only a fortnight [W.Maximoff]

pairing: sugarmommy!wanda x reader

summary: after hearing that someone's been flirting with wanda, you start questioning your place in her life. luckily, your relationship is one of the main things she's secure in.

warnings: mentions of dom/sub dynamics; allusions to sex but no smut yet; jealousy + insecurity; legal nonspecified age-gap; sugarmommy!wanda deserves her own warning tbh

wordcount: 2.2k

a/n: HI SO, i very randomly decided to make what was supposed to be a solo fic into a series so...this is the unofficial first part. don't get impatient with me, next part will be full smut, i got too attached to the story to rush a smut scene here. i think this is my first official wanda fic so i'm very excited to see how this goes. let me know your thoughts, hope you enjoy <3

* * * * * * *

You're not entirely sure how you ended up in this situation.

One day, you were a broke college student, barely hanging on by your teeth and the next, you were Wanda Maximoff's newest obsession. Everyone and their mom knew about the CEO, about the rumors that followed her wherever she went. She was rich, ruthless, dedicated in a way no one could match. She was a force to be reckoned with but most of all…she was your sugar mommy.

You wish you could say it had all been accidental, coincidental even. But it wasn't. At least, not fully.

A few months ago, your best friend had talked you into going out to a club with her. Kate was many things, mainly economically stable and with far more connections than a normal 22-year-old should have. Of course, that was due more to her mother than the brunette's charming personality.

You didn't fully understand why she was so adamant about acting like she wasn't a rich kid. Or rather, a privileged rich kid. It was refreshing, but it was a little hysterical considering she pretty much relied on her mother's riches for…everything.

Still, you appreciated how down to earth she was. Even when she dragged you into a ridiculously crowded club with drinks you couldn't afford. She didn't seem to mind, though, considering the ease with which she handed the bartender her credit card.

You hadn't expected anything interesting to happen that night. You assumed all you'd really do was get drunk and babysit Kate so she didn't run her mouth and get into a fight with the sleazy guys that always found their way to you.

Fate had other plans for you, it seemed, because Wanda Maximoff was there that night. And she was instantly drawn to you…and the way you slapped a sleazy guy for blatantly placing his hand on your ass.

She stepped in before security could even try to kick you out and she offered you a drink for your troubles.

It'd been unexpected but you had never been one to turn down a beautiful, slightly scary, woman. You didn't know it then, but accepting her offer was the best thing you'd ever done for yourself.

And not just because Wanda was even quicker to spend money on you than Kate.

So, as weird and uncharted territory as it was, you slowly got used to being the older woman's sugar baby. To spending your free time with her, to bringing her lunch when she forgot to take a break in between meetings, to giving yourself over to her every night in as many ways as you could handle.

Of course, that didn't come without its challenges. The biggest of them being your insecurities about your place in her life.

It didn't seem to matter how many times she reassured you that she wanted you, you knew being her sugar baby wasn't the same as being her girlfriend. You had no right to feel jealous when she went out for drinks with other CEOs. No right to be upset when people flirted with her at the club.

Just because you knew that, though, didn't mean you didn't get upset. You were grateful for Wanda, and even more grateful for the kindness she showed Kate by giving her a job at her company, but that gratefulness wasn't enough to quell the jealousy that crept up on you sometimes.

Especially when your lovely best friend added fuel to that fire.

It's late when you hear the front door of Wanda's penthouse open. You've spent the majority of the day by yourself, having been told not to visit the older woman at her office because of some important meetings she was going to have. You, being the obedient lover she knew you to be, did exactly as she asked despite how bored and lonely you got.

Things would have been fine had Kate not told you how flirty Wanda's assistant had been all day. It seemed every time Agnes made some sort of suggestive comment, your best friend was close enough to send you a message about it.

And to top it off, the older woman hadn't replied to your texts in a few hours. So, needless to say, watching her come home extremely late, after a long day apart, does little to help you feel better.

It takes no less than a minute for Wanda to walk into the living room, her fingers already unbuttoning the white blouse beneath her dark red blazer. "Why are you still awake, angel?"

As distracting as the sight is, you don't let it steal your thoughts away.

"Where were you?" You ask, already hating how soft your voice is.

"Where do you think?" She replies with a well-placed tilt of her head.

Even though her tone makes you want to back down, you hold your ground, not yet ready to continue without an answer. "You're back late. You never come back this late when you're at the office."

Your words make her pause. Her eyes scan your face as she comes closer, a sigh stuck in her throat. "You know these meetings run late sometimes. I went to get a drink afterward to unwind. Why are you so upset, sweetheart?"

"Kate said your secretary was making moves on you," you say, feeling your shoulders relax as you finally give a voice to the thoughts that have been plaguing you all day. "That you let her flirt with you."

Despite how soft she's trying to be, Wanda rolls her eyes. "Kate's an idiot."

"But she's not a liar," you reply before you can think better of it.

This time, the older woman isn't able to stop the flicker of annoyance that passes through her face. "Watch yourself, sweetheart. What's that supposed to mean?"

You barely manage to hold in a groan. Complaining would only make the situation worse for you, considering how little she lets you get away with when you're obviously upset.

"That she wouldn't make something up just because…" you trail off, almost not wanting to ask your next question. "It's true, isn't it?"

Wanda sighs, easily sliding onto your lap. Your hands instantly come up to grip her hips, greedily pulling her close to you, your heart pounding in your chest as you wait for her answer. "Yes, darling, it's true. Agnes was in a bold mood today, but I shot her down every time. She knows I'm taken."

Her words help soothe your jealousy somewhat but they're not enough to overshadow your insecurities. "Are you? Because I'm not your girlfriend."

"y/n," she says, her eyes narrowing slightly. "What are you trying to say?"

Even though you know she's not upset with you, her tone still makes you shrink into yourself. You had been so confident earlier, so sure of what you were going to say to her, of what you were going to ask, and now…it had all evaporated with one quick raise of her eyebrow.

"Nothing," you sigh. "It's stupid."

Wanda doesn't let you hide. Her hand comes up to cup your face, tilting your head back so you're looking up at her. "It's not stupid. You're jealous, aren't you, sweetheart?"

The softness in her voice does little to erode your insecurities. If anything, it makes you want to hide even more. To run away and pretend you never even brought up the idea of being more than…a pastime. Because maybe if you could escape the conversation, you could escape the reality. The very real possibility that she didn't want you to be anything more than her favorite toy.

"Why would I be jealous?" you respond, trying to muster up the rest of your courage. "I don't own you or your time."

The redhead sighs again, knowing it'll take more than a few well-placed words to get through to you. "What's with the attitude, hmm? What's going on in that pretty little head of yours?"

You recognize her words for what they are. The opportunity for you to be honest. To unload everything that's been overwhelming your mind since you realized how hard you'd fallen for the older woman. The fears, the insecurities, the uncontrollable need for her.

You almost don't want to admit it. Don't want to further complicate a situation that's gotten so out of your control. It was supposed to be temporary. You were supposed to be temporary. But you can't imagine a life outside of the one you've somehow built with her.

"I don't know," you finally say. "I just hate the thought of Agnes thinking she can flirt with you. She can't."

"She can't?" Wanda repeats, a hint of amusement seeping into her tone. "Why not, angel?"

She's toying with you, you know that. Turning you in circles until you're too confused to avoid answering her questions. Maybe it should feel manipulative, even cruel, but all it does is show you how well she knows you. How good she is at coaxing answers out of you by being soft and patient.

No one would believe you if you told them how sweet the ruthless businesswoman is. How easy it is to make her melt and give in to your every whim.

It would be ridiculous if you weren't the one wrapped right around her finger.

"Because…" You trail off with a huff. "You know why."

"Come on, baby," she tries again, her fingers caressing your jawline and making sure you keep your eyes on her. "I need to hear you say it. Please? For me."

All you allow yourself is a whine at first. Just the smallest sign of weakness. Of the brat Wanda secretly loves taming.

"Because you're my domme," you say, that hint of petulance still lingering in your tone. "You're supposed to be mine, not hers."

The corners of her mouth quirk up just enough to show how entertained she is by the exchange. In her defense, she does what she can to keep her expression serious, as if you're not just acting like a brat because you're jealous.

"I am yours, darling," Wanda replies. "You don't have to worry about Agnes. Or anyone else for that matter."

Her words manage to cut through the thick fog in your head left behind by your constant worries. They're not enough to fully erase your insecurities but it's a start. A start to the conversation you should have already had.

"You really mean it?" You find yourself asking.

You want to hate yourself for sounding so insecure, but you can't. The hard truth is, you need to hear her answer. Need to hear her put a label to what you two have. A label that goes beyond the sweet petnames she has for you.

"I do," she says, her voice dropping its usual teasing edge. "I don't want anyone else but you. I'm yours just as much as you're mine."

The words go right to your head, giving you a rush you've never felt before. It very quickly dawns on you why the older woman likes it so much when you say those words. Why it always makes her look like she's on top of the world.

"Say it again," you mumble, the softness in your tone making you feel particularly vulnerable.

The smile that grazes Wanda's face is nothing short of affectionate. "I'm yours, angel. You're the only one I want to be with."

Your hands on her hips slide around until your arms are around her waist and you're pulling her impossibly closer. You practically lunge forward, your lips seeking out hers and crashing into them.

It's not the most romantic kiss you've ever shared by any means, but the intensity behind your movements only makes it better. Especially when she kisses you back with that same passion.

Almost instantly, you're left wanting more.

"Wanda," you whisper against her lips. "I need you."

"I'm right here, baby. You can have me."

Her words would usually be enough to melt you until all you could think about was having her on top of you. Tonight, though, the desire you're suddenly hit with is different.

You need to touch her. To feel her against you. To hear her say your name over and over again until there's nothing left except the two of you.

You're not entirely sure how to express that need, though. Far too used to your usual dynamic and how easy your submission flows.

"Not like that," you say, your cheeks flushing.

Wanda simply stares at you with those same sharp eyes that hold a sea of affection you can't even begin to understand. "Is that right? You want to touch Mommy tonight, hmm?"

You nod, already feeling breathless from the thought of getting to touch her.

To show her you can be good in a different way.

* * * * * * *

taglist: @boredandneedfanfics @rosekjsses

[gloomygloworm]

I open Dragon Age: The Veilguard

I play the game, and I think to myself ‘weird I thought this was a choices and politics game ft metaphors from real history like slavery’ 

My friends go “you’re right that’s what it’s supposed to be but this game is lacking those things”

I go “oh bummer that sucks, I like moral quandaries.”

I see a post that publicly wonders why people are upset that one of the main metaphors (slavery) is missing from the game.

I respond saying yeah its weird that people are complaining that a Big Metaphor is missing from the Big Metaphor Game

I get asked what part of the game matches the Main Metaphor, and I respond with “well, the elves are second class citizens.” I am doing research specifically on the elves. I read in the wiki, with sources, that yeah, no, I’m right, the Church said “if you kiss an elf that’s basically the same thing as kissing a dog.” Elves don’t have rights in most of the countries that the other games are in. One of these places in the North is the Big Metaphor Place where they looooove the Big Metaphor and using the Big Metaphor, but I get called weird for wondering why it’s mostly absent from the game.

I open my blinds and find out that National Holocaust Remembrance Day is no longer a federal holiday. I also find out that my government is trying to "deport" the native citizens of said country. I go back online and find a thread from 2009 where one of the writers explicitly states “Yeah the Dalish started as a metaphor for the Roma but evolved into more like the Native Americans, and the Andrastean Elves are like the Jewish during Nazi Occupied Germany.”

I say “oh okay so Tevinter is like Nazi Occupied Germany. Yeah it’s weird that they’ve kind of sanitized this place and I can’t find the evidence of this anywhere.”

Someone calls me weird again and tells me to read the Codex. Someone else mentions the very beginning of the game, where you see shackles on the ground and there is mention of an elf who is freeing slaves, none of which I witness. I wonder if the slaves are in the room with me. 

Someone else mentions that this is the first time we see Tevinter without any biases, mentioning two characters, Dorian and Fenris.

My friends, horrified, tell me Fenris is an ex-slave (who can be given BACK to his slave owner) and Dorian’s family are Slave Owners. I think to myself huh that’s kind of a weird thing to say considering the biases are “I was a slave” and “Yeah my family owns slaves but that’s kinda bad huh” cause that’s the same exact concept. 

I say “well elves don’t have rights, that sucks, but I wish we got to see more of their day to day. I hear about these alienages that in other games we’ve been able to see, it’s weird there isn’t one in the very poor part of the Capital of the Big Metaphor Place, where there would be a high number of these people.”

Someone says “why do you want to see them suffering? That’s weird.”

I say “yeah but there’s beauty in adversity and I didn’t write the game, I want to see this big tree the alienages supposedly have as a sort of last hope for the city elves to cling to their lost culture.” 

Someone calls me weird.

I open my blinds and politicians and big public figures are giving Nazi salutes in public rallies. 

I boot up Veilguard.

I boot up Origins and get called a slur within the first five minutes of the game. 

I picked a circle elven mage, but I use youtube to look up the city elf origin and go “oh holy fuck wow they just put it right out there huh? That’s the world state, now I know.”

Someone tells me that I should play the game because I would enjoy being sexually assaulted and violated.

I literally don’t have a response to that in any comprehensive way because that is a wild thing to say to a stranger. It is, in fact, two subjects I have intimate knowledge of as a victim of both domestic abuse and sexual assault. 

Someone tells me to just read the Codex.

Someone tells me to just read the Diary of Anne Frank.

I buy the art book for Veilguard and see that some of the major players they nixed were ex-slaves. I look at Reva and I say “oh hey cool concept” 

Someone calls me an idiot online and I laugh while closing my blinds, because purity culture is once more making a comeback and if I licked a single rock in Arlathan all I’d taste was bleach.

[nobody-nexus]

Episode 4 Talk: Ragatha

LOOK I know this is the Gangle episode (And yes I WILL give my own thoughts and feelings on her later because there's SO much to unpack with Gangle) but I wanna share my thoughts on Ragatha and what it shows about her character since the next episode is all about her.

I think Ragatha was honestly a highlight of her character just not in the typical sense. The reason is because the way she showed flaws in her character was unique and not how most flaws are shown. The stupid sauce making her honest is very interesting to me, but I also think a lot of people won't fully understand what this means

So- let's start with this over analysis on this character and why she's still honestly my favorite in the series

(SPOILERS AHEAD)

First of all, there's no doubt that the stadium teaser is the Ragatha episode. She is literally teaching Gangle how to throw a ball. It's something she knows about well, and it'll make sense for that to be where we see her the most. Of COURSE she's gonna love a teamwork-based game, but similar to this episode, it's probably gonna boomerang back into something horrible

But then there's after Gangle's mask is broken. After checking if Gangle's okay (sort of, she didn't exactly try) she instantly attacks Jax and they start to fight

Considering a line later in the episode that she said that I'll talk about later on in this essay, I think this does make sense for her character. She seems to have a short tempter with specifically Jax, so she's more likely to turn on him. I think this is due to how he behaves in general, so them always being at each other's throats is probably a very common thing

Them arguing as well gives off (personally) sibling or roommate energy, which I kinda appreciate

After a bit though, we get to the REAL meat of the analysis (pun intended tee hee) which is... the stupid sauce

First of all: I do kinda feel bad for Ragatha. She honestly would've been a fine employee (maybe overworked like Jax?), but the stupid sauce getting into her eye was 100% accidental. Meaning from here on out, we know Ragatha is not completely in character, and against her will at that point

But also the creepy scene out of nowhere makes me think that maybe this stupid sauce isn't the best thing to have....

(although on a funny unrelated note, her reaction makes me think she's a bit of a monster fucker. Hehe, Ragatha x Gangle go brrr)

After a bit of funnier shenanigans, and the Gummigoo thing, we get to the first bits of these impulsive honest thoughts

I think that how these "honest thoughts" work is that they're not like her ACTUAL thoughts, but instead it's what she's thinking at that exact moment. She's going off on exactly what she's thinking and just speaking without foresight. This is the first line that I think implies this, especially with the "I wish someone flirted with me" line

She's not exactly jealous. She's just- saying what comes to her mind. And at this moment, its mild annoyance turning into being upset that she doesn't get that same treatment. Like the "Why isn't that me, why not I get that treatment?" impulsive thought

After some more funny, and a very creepy scene that I swear to GOD is a Get Out reference, we get to another part that for me proves that "Impulsive Honesty" idea for Ragatha. She's TRYING to work, but just- kinda can't cause she's all slouchy and all that, to which Zooble gets annoyed

And then Ragatha calls her a "grouch"

She only says this because Zooble's complaining that she's not doing anything. And Ragatha, having impulsive honesty, just complains back only to say something that makes herself laugh

It's just what she's thinking at the moment

And then here's the part where I think a lot of people aren't going to get this right: The Ragatha and Gangle conversation

This scene is VERY important to me. Specifically, with what it shares about Ragatha. First of all, we get LORE-??? She HAD HORSES AT SOME POINT???

And then we get two lines that I can say as someone who has actually recently been so sick while on their period that I had zero filter in the slightest are 100% impulsive honesty

First, we have the "I'm more responsible than you" line. First of all, she's not. She REALLY fucking isn't. She's all bark and no bite she does NOT have the mature attitude it takes to being a manager despite being older. In fact, it's funny she says this because of the fact that she's the ONLY character working under Gangle that's older

She's been in the circus for a while, and that means she also didn't mature from her mindset from whenever she joined in, which I do think it'd be rather young considering Kinger's age

So this "I'm responsible because I'm older" mindset is certainly on the table for why she said this. Probably because she was taught this mindset when growing up

She would NEVER think this is sober I believe though. Again. IMPULSIVE HONESTY. What was on her mind AT THAT EXACT MOMENT

(Also side note: Gangle still clearly cares about Ragatha in this scene, and I think she knows she'd be a bad manager due to her own struggles and flaws)

Of course after the HONESTLY AMAZING RAGGEDY ANDY REFERENCE we get the scene I feel that's gonna make people misunderstand her the most... THIS SCENE.

This whole scene is so interesting about how Ragatha's impulsive honesty works. Because let's be honest... We've ALL had these thoughts. Like em or not, we all have thoughts like this where you find people you care about annoying or undesirable. You never WANT to have them or say them aloud, but you have those thoughts

The difference? Ragatha has no filter. She doesn't know HOW to shut up at this point and time, so she says something she didn't MEAN to say out loud. And the line she says AFTER confirms this:

SHE DOESN'T REALIZE WHAT SHE SAID WAS EVEN MEAN

Yes, it was mean, I can't deny that- but what I'm saying is that there's a lot of thoughts that go through your head every moment of every day, and not every thought you have is desirable

That's the case here. Ragatha, with no filter, WILL say mean things that she'll NEVER say sober. But I find that her even having these thoughts is a bit of foreshadowing for the future. Perhaps she'll either be more likely to hide how she feels more or be more accepting of them after her episode. Guess we'll have to wait and see for that

EDIT: THANK YOU TO @kingzombear for their post because THIS IS ALSO VERY IMPORTANT TO ADD- the way Ragatha words what she says is something to also take into consideration. While Jax straight up says he likes her better when sad, Ragatha's mention of the happy mask makes this important as well

Notice: It's "Happy Mask" and NOT "Comedy Mask". Both the concept art Goose has posted on Twitter AND how even Gangle doesn't call this mask Zooble gave her a comedy mask, but instead it's referred to AS a happy mask

Now knowing what this mask is specifically called, we now know that even though what Ragatha said SPECIFICALLY was hurtful, that was NOT the intention. Sure, words will still hurt that's a given- but let's think about it more like this:

Ragatha doesn't like Gangle's masking. She likes her when she's being her authentic self and even while basically drunk, she can tell this is NOT Gangle. But also it shows her own flaws because Ragatha is also being a hypocrite

She herself masks her true thoughts and feelings for some people (as will be discussed in a moment), but that also means she can tell when a smile is fake. Because she has a faker smile overall. This mixed with impulsive blunt honesty leads to a line that I think even Gangle didn't understand considering her reaction was to begin to spiral into a mental breakdown

The power of wording can make any context for a scene THAT MUCH DIFFERENT so again thanks for @kingzombear for pointing this out cause this is ALSO really good to understand Ragatha as a character even more- especially her flaws

But of course, that's not the last thing, because I just mentioned the hiding true thoughts and feelings:

The last scene that's important gives us full context of what it's like to BE a people pleaser. When Jax and Ragatha interact while she's on the floor. Although more impulsive honesty, in this case it's her realizing her tendencies. Her people pleaser ways

This is her just sort of- realizing she had a weird mindset but doesn't have the right word for it- which I find neat. Not as groundbreaking in my opinion since I always felt she sorta hated Jax with how explosive she usually is with him and all, but her admitting it, even in such a state, is kinda refreshing to hear

Anyway that's my essay over. I hope this can give some new thoughts on Ragatha as a character! She's my favorite for a reason, and I want people to see how fleshed out she really is!

See you another time. Probably with some art too ^^

[rmbunnie]

It's most likely just Starlin trying to get to Jason dying faster because he did not like Robin, but the whole "Jason's spiraling because of his grief for his parents" thing they were trying to spin was honestly really weird, not supported by the rest of the run INCLUDING the parts Starlin wrote, and kinda reads like an unreliable narrator situation because all of the information supporting it is given through Bruce's narration, him speculating on Jason's thoughts and actions.

The plot thread of Jason's grief for his family affecting his behavior shows up like TWO issues after Jason first becomes Robin back when Collins was writing, and gets sorted out after one conversation where Jason gets to confront Bruce about hiding his father's death from him for 6 months. After that Jason is behaving normally until they encounter three predators in a row, and each time Bruce insists that they can't do anything because of The Rules and assorted red tape/diplomatic immunity plotlines. (The sister of a woman who got dismembered actually tricked the violent-misogynist killer who dismembered her sister (and then got his serial killings dismissed through a technicality) into attacking her, and ends up killing him in self-defense, and then Jason's like "seems fair" and Bruce is like "no. it's NOT. we need to follow laws and not take justice into our own hands. which like wtf Bruce! you are a vigilante who just used a custom tank to fight an evil televangelist! who then got ripped to shreds by his followers while you watched!)

Bruce kinda just decides with Alfred that it must be grief upsetting him and not the dozens of brutally killed women and their predatory killers who the law inexplicably protected, (all written by Starlin, so retconning it for DitF like five issues later would be an odd move) but the only text claiming that's why Jason was upset is from Bruce's POV and through Alfred's dialogue. Jason himself doesn't display any signs of grief in the story itself, or even act or speak in a way that alludes to Catherine and Willis beyond looking at a picture of them and smiling fondly while he sorts through their possessions. He kinda just happens upon the box with his mother's info by chance, and is like ok i guess we're doing mom searches now. He was only going for a walk through his old neighborhood, not actively searching out info on his family. When Jason is deciding whether or not to run off without telling Bruce, he considers telling him and then goes "no, all he cares about is being Batman, he wouldn't even understand why I want to see my mom." Which, I mean, "Bruce wouldn't get it" is a REALLY odd angle if the sole motivator for spiraling, then getting benched* and running away to search out his bio-mom, was because he was mourning his dead parents, a thing he notably has in common with Bruce. That statement only really makes sense if he's thinking about a different thing that was greatly upsetting to him that Bruce brushed past, like maybe a combo of hiding the murder of his dad for half a year and allowing several cases involving sexual violence to freely develop body counts in the name of the law.

Lots of people have written about how Jason's stay in the manor might have seemed dependent on being Robin with how he was kinda just scooped up, but (if we're including Detective Comics in our characterization,) Bruce had offered to let him resign from Robin and just live with him (a little late, but still. It's worth noting Batman proper shows Jason afraid and uncomfortable at the thought of Dick taking Robin back, which lends more merit to the housing-dependent-on-Robin-misunderstanding interpretation, but canon is pick and choose anyways.) The lack of trust involved in his choice to search out his mom kinda reads like it was bred by more than that alone, and Bruce's prioritization of the law over the protection of the people it ignores is notably upsetting to him in the prior issues. tbh I really do believe the outcomes of those cases could have informed Jason's stance that Bruce's method of justice is ineffective right alongside his own murder and his experiences in Lost Days.

It would make sense for Bruce to not consider his own actions while he's thinking through things that would upset Jason, because from his point of view the things there that were bothering Jason were the criminals alone, not the way that the methods with which they were approaching their crimes continually led to the perpetrators evading actual justice. During the point in DitF where he's thinking through motivations for Jason's running away because something isn't adding up for HIM, the idea doesn't so much as cross his mind. It would also add another layer to Jason's sulkiness upon Bruce's arrival if he held the belief that Bruce is ignoring the consequences his brand of justice has on victims (and the way it's affecting him to helplessly watch it play out), starts to hope that Bruce actually can understand his thought processes/relate to him when he shows up, only to be told to his face that Bruce is prioritizing his style of justice over Jason again. With the way everything that led Jason to his bio-mom was comically circumstantial and the context of the previous issues, it's kind of the ONLY way Death in the Family makes sense to me. Tldr: I feel like the grief claimed as reasoning for Jason's actions leading up to his death is mainly speculation from Bruce and Alfred and the more textually-supported reason for his erratic behavior and lack of trust in Bruce is the lack of intervention in several sensitive cases that led them to worsen unobstructed and eventually permitted them to escalate into casualties in 2 out of 3 cases.

*Also, side note, but the idea that Jason got benched for the Filipe situation, while perfectly reasonable, is not quite spot on. The Filipe situation escalated into the fight in the junkyard where his dad is crushed by a car and Bruce is all "everything you do has consequences" which is kinda big words for a guy whose lack of action indirectly lead to a girls death earlier in the storyline, but true. Jason actally gets benched because he jumps directly into gunfire while fighting the third set of predators and Bruce starts to worry he's getting a little suicidal with it. He baits a guy into shooting at him on purpose again trying to protect mom prospect number 1 later on in DitF, so Bruce might have had a point with that one.

[topazadine]

Avoiding therapy speak in writing

I think we all know by now that therapy speak is irritating and unrealistic, especially if you are writing in a fantasy world that doesn't even have modern psychology.

Part of the reason that it is so annoying is that it is the definition of telling instead of showing: characters are just plainly informing us of their feelings rather than making us work for a better understanding. It's cheap and boring. Instead of making your characters seem like complex individuals with their own hangups and difficulties, they seem like plot points programmed to tell us things.

But obviously, you want to put these people in situations and have them talk about it! How do you do that without sounding maudlin? Here are some options.

Listen to real arguments/conversations

I cannot stress enough how important it is to listen to how actual real human beings talk to each other during heightened emotional states. They don't have to be nasty abusers, and they don't have to be perfect angels, just everyday people doing their normal thing.

Of course, I'd hope you're not seeing people argue all the time, but if you do happen to see it, listen carefully and notice how people actually address their problems. Think back to tough conversations that you have had, even if you wouldn't classify them as arguments. Consider how people acted and reacted to one another. Notice how normal humans talk about issues outside of therapy, even intelligent and emotionally evolved people.

I've had years of therapy, and even I do not talk in therapy ways about my issues when I'm talking to my family or friends. It just feels cheesy and fake outside of that particular setting - plus, it freaks other people out and can seem kind of manipulative. Try talking like that in a real conversation and see how uncomfortable it is. You'll understand why avoiding therapy speak is important.

Consider the character's own hangups

Just as everyone has their own unique speaking style and mindset, so do we all have our own argument styles. These are often informed by our pasts and upbringing; they are as varied as our own histories. However, there are a few different options.

Someone with a happy upbringing may be more assertive and willing to address their problems because they had that demonstrated to them as children.

A spoiled child will grow up to be a demanding adult who refuses to give any quarter.

Those who got yelled at a lot as children may shut down and fawn to avoid getting hurt.

Someone who grew up in a violent household may mimic that behavior and get incredibly aggressive when upset.

Individuals whose parents didn't teach them emotional regulation will lash out and get loud.

Manipulative people may stay very calm and gaslight the other person, or they may get hysterical to garner sympathy and make people focus on comforting them.

Someone who has gone to therapy may revert to their original argument style, or they may imperfectly apply what they have learned in a way that feels a bit unnatural. They may start out with rage, then force themselves to calm down through grounding techniques.

People who have been coached through previous emotional outbursts could demand a time out, then fail to actually calm themselves down.

Some may refuse to acknowledge they are upset and insist, in increasingly forceful terms, that they are fine.

Others may get quiet or crack a joke to ease the tension, but it doesn't really help.

Keep each confrontation short

IRL, emotional confrontations are generally not that long. They don't go on for hours and hours, though it can feel that way. No one is going on and on about their feelings and sharing every little detail of how they feel (at least not that I know of personally, maybe other people are different).

Even the worst arguments I have had, the real nexus of the argument was maybe an hour or two, though the fallout lasted much longer. I'd say there was an hour maximum of real, active confrontation, preceded or followed by hours/days/weeks of simmering frustration.

Why? Because arguments are exhausting. You don't have the energy for that in the heat of the moment. Yes, feuds and fights can last years, but each actual confrontation is short.

For longer, more serious issues, hash it out over a few sessions rather than all at once. It's rare to get everything out of the way immediately unless the characters already have a strong, loving relationship.

Show incongruencies

Especially for more reserved people, they will likely have their emotions leaking all over the place but won't actually say anything. As such, focus on body language while keeping the conversation more focused on the plot. For example, Character A might be crying but still trying to argue their point about whatever is going on.

Address physical complaints instead of emotional ones

In many cases, people will use "I'm tired" or "I didn't sleep well" or "I'm not feeling great" as shorthand for whatever is actually bothering them. It relieves pressure by not making them talk about upsetting matters while still addressing their discomfort in some form.

You should also consider the fact that some people can't connect physical sensations to feelings, so they may genuinely feel ill and not really understand why. This is especially common in people who can't emotionally regulate or have been through trauma.

For myself, I tend to somatize my feelings, so I might not feel upset, but I will feel physically sick. My stomach will hurt, my chest will get tight, or I'll get a headache, but my emotional state will seem calm. This isn't all that unusual, and many people experience this to different degrees.

As such, you can have your character say that their stomach hurts, or that they have a headache and can't discuss this anymore, or that they need to go lie down because they're dizzy. If we know they're relatively healthy, this can be a clue that they're getting overwhelmed but either cannot pinpoint their emotions or don't want to discuss them.

Let characters advance and retreat

A lot of the time, someone will address a scary emotion and then retreat again, sometimes over a period of hours, days, or even weeks. This is normal: most of us don't have the emotional fortitude to forge ahead through something difficult all in one go. Character A may say something vulnerable, then change the topic, laugh it off, say they're done discussing it, or even leave the situation.

Leave emotions partially unaddressed

Again, it's rare for someone to spill out everything they're feeling all in one go. As such, have Character A address the most important thing - or the least important, depending on their level of emotional maturity - and let it be done for then.

They might say their small piece, but when someone tries to probe deeper, they don't have an answer, or they get "stuck" on that one emotional level and cannot go further.

If Character B keeps pushing, then they may get incredibly upset and push back, or retreat.

Have Character B point out the feelings

Works especially well if the other character is a close companion or a parental figure. Often, people who know us really well will have better insight into our emotions than we do. Or, we might have good insight into our emotions but are still too afraid to open up. Having Character B point out the issue gives Character A grace to be more honest.

I can't tell you how many times I've been really upset, so I've distracted from the issue by getting angry about something completely different. Then, my mom will gently point out that I'm not actually crying about my new plastic cup being broken or whatever; I'm actually upset about XYZ. In that moment, I realize I've been caught out and admit that yes, that's what I'm really upset about.

Have Character A address it with a third character

Who among us hasn't gone to someone else to talk about our feelings? Having a third party serve as a sounding board is normal. Sometimes, Character A will feel such catharsis from this conversation that they don't address it as thoroughly with Character B.

Of course, you can use this to your advantage and create more tension if the third character gives bad advice or is biased.

Remember that just because the third party responded well does not mean that Character B does. You also have to avoid omniscience and remember that Character B wasn't privy to that conversation.

Have one confrontation be a stand-in for a larger one

I always think about the "The Iranian Yogurt Is Not the Issue" post when I think about this. Often times, things like not doing the dishes or whatever aren't actually the big deal: it's lack of boundaries, communication, or respect. A minor argument can be shorthand for a larger one that is too challenging for the characters to tackle.

This isn't just creating drama for the hell of it, though; it's about exploring the larger issues without making the characters lay it out on the table. A good reader will be able to see it's not about the Iranian Yogurt as long as you set up the relationship well.

Currently, I am writing a story where Uileac and his sister Cerie go to rescue Uileac's husband, Orrinir. On the way there, Uileac idly comments on how he wonders where a waterfall comes from because he's trying to distract himself from thinking about the fact that his husband is kidnapped and possibly dead.

Cerie, being pretty wound up too, starts arguing with him about it because she's like "why is this relevant? We're kind of too busy to think about geology right now!" Uileac gets annoyed at her for being so aggro, and she gets annoyed at him for being so irreverent. Both of them are upset about something completely different, but they're too scared and panicked to actually address that, so they release their frustrations by complaining about waterfalls.

Those bad vibes have to go somewhere, but neither of them are very good at talking about their feelings (though very good at stuffing them down). As such, they take the pressure off by sniping at one another. You've probably done this too, when you get into a dumb argument about something absolutely pointless because there's something you don't feel strong enough to discuss.

There's also the fact that if you're mad at someone about something but feel it's too stupid or petty to discuss, that frustration will leak out and everything else they do will annoy you, leading to a bunch of irrelevant arguments.

Use "reaffirmation" gestures

I talked about this in a different post, but after an argument, the "make up" stage doesn't always involve going "ohhh I forgive you" and big hugs and kisses, especially when the two characters aren't emotionally mature.

Instead, Character A makes gestures that reaffirm the relationship. This could be offering to do something Character B needs, making plans for later, or changing the topic to discuss something the other character cares about ("how are your cats doing?") etc.

Note that these "reaffirmation" gestures aren't the same as the cycle of abuse. This is more when two characters have had a difficult emotional conversation but aren't really sure how to continue being emotionally open, so they revert to something safer that still shows they care. They're not over-the-top gestures either, but more a special attention to something the other person loves. Knowing what the other person loves also demonstrates the depth of their relationship.

As always, I can't tell you what to do with your writing.

You are the crafter of your own story, and if you want people to talk like therapists for whatever reason, that's your choice. However, we want characters to feel like real people, and most real people don't lay it all out on the table every single time they're upset. If they do, they might be trauma vomiting, which is icky in and of itself.

Healthy communication isn't always perfect communication. People can have strong, loving relationships and still get things wrong - we're human. Having people calmly and rationally and easily talk about their feelings every single time is not only kind of boring, but it also feels weird, because unless we're primed to discuss those difficult topics and know we're perfectly safe, we're not going to do that.

People don't even do that in therapy, where they are paying for the service of talking about their feelings! Therapists also don't always do that IRL!

We're humans, and your characters need to feel like humans as well. That means letting them be imperfect communicators and using context clues rather than making them do all the work for the reader.

If you liked my advice, consider purchasing my book, 9 Years Yearning, for $3!

[biancasaidstfu]

FAVE ANON HERE 🤍

First things first -

“OMG VIP MEET AND GREET TSWIFT TICKETS FOR HER NEXT TOUR 😱😱😱” - I consider this a binding contract. You might understand that more BIANCA if you did your LSAT studying. 😉

Now to matters at hand -

I hear people have been checking in with Bianca to see where I stand these days. You can all rest assured that I am firmly planted in the same place you last heard from me. The same place I’ve been firmly planted since last summer. While I’ve had some slight shifts over time in my “whys” or “hows” of the current situation, I never doubt my “what” and for that matter I actually have a fairly solid “why and how” theory that I’ve been continuously throwing around since last summer and every month it seems to grow more solid in its foundation.

Did my vague-ness of that last paragraph confuse you? Simple terms: N & L are together. And why is it so secret? Well that’s a theory for me to know and you to maybe find out one day. That’s it. Those close to me know what the theory is.

It all comes down to knowing how to keep things in the group chat. 😏

With that being said, I have an observation of the fandom that I need to make express. People talk crap about the Jackholes and Tif & Co for being “stalkers” or “invasive” and “not respecting privacy” but why are we not casting as much ire on the Lukolas who are exhibiting the exact same behavior. The ones who are so desperate to “break the news” that they run to Twitter or TikTok or Tumblr to post something without thinking it through. The ones who are seeing research in discord servers and posting to their platforms. The ones who are delivering news of a personal nature about Nicola or Luke on their blogs without blinking an eye - and most importantly - reporting it as fact without any of us ever knowing that it is actually fact.

I understand that you online platform is your own personal forum and no one here is trying to police you but I implore everyone to take a step back and look in the mirror. This behavior is no different from the Jackholes and if you support it than I never wanna hear you talk down on Tif and her friends again.

While I’m on the subject of talking down - can we cut the crap on the Nicola hate? I’m sorry but Jake is gay. I’m also sorry but Jake is her friend and he’s not a character that will be written off the show. If he face “triggers” you or causes a “jumpscare” please unfollow him and his friends. And no, Nicola is not a bad person when you see her hanging out with them. There is nothing wrong with a “single” 38 year old woman having friends in their mid 20s. Let’s be honest, at this point most of yall are spewing hate at her because you believe something about her that certain online creators are stating as fact and so it’s hurting your brain to see her out and about so often. THIS IS WHY WE DONT BLINDLY BELIEVE THEORIES. And regardless, it’s her life. If it bothers you that much then please move on from the fandom.

The amount of judgment in this fandom from people regarding who Nic and Luke hang around. I would like each of you to submit the following: a detailed history of your romantic relationships, a detailed history or your friendships, and a picture of yourself (not a pfp of Nic or Luke). Once I’ve reviewed all that, I will decide if you have the credentials to judge at the level in which you do.

That’s enough rambling for now and I’m sure after this some of you will never wanna hear from me ever again. But what can I say - I call it like i see it and i tell it like it is.

For now, I’m just gonna sit back and let the chips fall as they may. All will be revealed in due time and tbh none of this is worth getting upset over. I’ve faced way harder in the past 6 months. 😉🥴 I just need some of you to remember that this isn’t a reality show required to keep you entertained on a regular schedule so it may be wise to pick up some other hobbies in the meantime.

As for me, you can catch me with my nose in the Polin fanfic when I’m not working my real person job and dealing with a slew of current personal issues. If it’s fantasy you’re looking to involve yourself in, than maybe head over to AO3. What’s even crazier is that there are even tons of fics about Pen and Colin being pregnant, you know if that’s the kind of story you’re looking to live in everyday. 😏

Ok well that’s it. 😘

xoxo

Fave anon has returned 🎉🎉🎉

[str4wberrysw4n]

𝐓𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝟑𝐃 𝐎𝐅𝐅 𝐀 𝐏𝐄𝐃𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐋!! + 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 𝐓𝐎 𝐃𝐎 𝐈𝐍𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐀𝐃 🧁

i don't want to give out too much info, but i have a friend who doesn't come to school very often. she's absent for majority of the week or comes late so i barely get to see her. today, she didn't come and she hadn't come the day before. most of the time, i try to text her to see if she'll respond, but today i thought to myself "why am i upset she isn't at school? besides it doesn't matter to me. I would like for her to be here but it's not a big deal if she isn't." so after 2nd period, we meet up at the stairs so we can walk to class. when she's not here, i wait for her just in case she came late or smth. this time, i simply walked upstairs. smth was telling me that my friend would be here somehow, but i ignored it.

imagine my surprise when i sat down, looked to my right, and saw her sitting down in the flesh. just there. i was shocked.

now, ik this might not seem like a manifestation (spoiler alert: I count it as one) unless u knew how i would affirm for her to come to school only to not get results. i consider her one of my best friends and school isn't the same without her. it was frustrating that the results would only come days later, yet the moment i said i didn't care, it came to me. why?

imo, the key was that I didn't put it on a pedestal. I told myself "I would LIKE for her to come, but it's not a BIG DEAL if she doesn't." i used this not only bcuz it happened at the time im writing this, but bcuz it's a perfect example of how taking ur manifestations off a pedestal helps.

imagine being a king/queen. u have literally everything u desire with the snap of ur fingers. u control everyone and everything around u. but then, u want something that u don't have in the 3d. u have it the 4d, but YOU don't see it bcuz ur eyes are only honed in on the physical world. all of a sudden, u put this object of desire,that u ALREADY have, ABOVE u. it's what u need or else u'll practically fall and break into thousands of pieces. doesn't make any sense, right? well that's literally how it is when u put ur manifestation on such a high pedestal.

YOU are the prize. YOU should be the one placed on the pedestal and stay on it. ik it's hard, especially when there's no evidence of the 3d showing u that -- but it's true. that's why when u care so much abt a manifestation, u are quite literally taking urself off and putting something way less important on there. it's hard to accept that, bcuz society has literally told us that some people are better than others. those who feed into money, fame, "above average" beauty, concepts that only exist in the 3d. but the truth is being tied down to thoughts like that will only make things harder for u.

I'm not saying u shouldn't try to manifest concepts that we know from the 3d -- almost everyone is. I would be a hypocrite to say that when im literally trying to manifest clothes rn lol. im saying that u should stop thinking of those concepts as "impossible" or "out of ur league", bcuz unless u say so, YOU are the standard. stuff like that will only drag u down into the illusion of the 3d.

to sum it up, stop putting the 3d on a pedestal and put urself on there!! when ur able to detach and no longer depend on ur manifestation coming through, it helps it pass through ur 4d level of consciousness and materialize into the 3d. someone with everything doesn't cry abt something they ASSUME they don't have. now, u might be asking: "what do i do if i can't get my mind off it?" i know all too well that this task is easier said than done, so i wanted to help!! :3 these r just some general hobbies u can do instead of obsessing over manifestations!!

🎀 drawing or some form of art

🎀 self care day

🎀 baking

🎀 studying

🎀clean ur room

🎀 text/face time ur friends

🎀 window shopping (my fav lol)

🎀 read a book

🎀 indulge in one of ur own personal hobbies

these r just some of the things that i do when i find myself stressed with a manifestation!! as always, this is all imo, and im just trying my best to help!! happy manifesting ╰(✿´⌣`✿)╯♡

[jarofstyles]

Leather & Lace 3

Hi loves! This is the last official part of leather and lace but I’m open to doing some one shots and blurbs for them if you want (send requests for what you’d want to see)

Leather & Lace Masterlist

Check out our Patreon for early access to pieces and 170+ exclusive writings

WC- 6.3k

Warnings- smut, unprotected sex, soft dom H, slight degradation, praise kink, impact play, light choking, etc all the good stuff.

Y/N padded out of his bedroom with his shirt hanging down on her form. Standing in his kitchen, he placed the glass down with a clink, watching her as she came closer. Glasses on her nose, makeup freshly off, hair tossed on top of her head, and something in her hand. “There she is.” He smiled, leaning against the corner of his countertops. “Took a minute didn’t you? Cinnamon rolls are almost done”. The stock he kept in his fridge for her favorite treat was put to use tonight. 

“Amazing.” She beamed, coming up to him. “Sit on the stool, please. I brought a makeup wipe so I can get your eyeliner off, cause I know you’re gonna whine that you’re tired later and then you’ll whine when you get a stye.” Y/N had been through this before a million times. 

“Always thinking ahead, aren’t you Butterfly?” He laughed, tapping her nose with his fingertip and not bothering to argue. It was true. He would definitely do that, and it wouldn’t be the first or last time he did. “Alright. Be gentle with me please, m’delicate”. 

Closing his eyes, he felt her warm fingers angle his face where she wanted before the cool wipe made contact with his skin. 

“So delicate with your bruised and split knuckles, hm? What did the poor punching bag do to you this week? Does he owe you money?” One of his favorite things about Y/N since day one had been her banter. They could go back and forth and she was quick to respond. It was playful, always, but she did tend to get more out of him when she approached it this way. She was asking why he’d been upset this week and been hitting the bag so aggressively and without gloves. 

Considering they had just made it official 2 hours ago, she was the best girlfriend ever. She wouldn’t push if he didn’t want to say it and he knew the girl would just nod and move on if he said he didn’t want to talk about it, but he found himself wanting to spill every single thought that crossed his mind to her. Y/N just didn’t have a clue. 

“Mm. My father called me.” He said softly into the cinnamon scented air. The sweetness made the bitter notes of his words a bit easier to tolerate. “Just same old shit, y’know? Nothing I do is gonna be good enough. Even though I’m successful in my own right, he’s always got to add those digs in.” The tumultuous relationship between Harry and his father had always been a sore spot. They weren’t enemies and he didn’t hate him, no, but their relationship had been rocky since Harry had gone to uni and not followed in his footsteps. He tried to be supportive in his own way but it was obvious that he disapproved.

Even though he was a grown man and he had plenty of other people proud of him, it always stung. “Sucks sometimes, that I want his approval. It’s the tiniest bit in me, a speck, but I can always feel it when I talk to him. It’s been a few years since the whole blowout and it’s gotten better but I just have to get over it, I guess. I don’t think he ever will.” Even though his sister had done what he wanted Harry to do, it wasn’t the same in his eyes. 

“I can only imagine.” There was a delicate pause as she got underneath his waterline. “But it’s okay to be upset about it, you know?” She always tried to tread lightly while also being truthful. It was a sensitive subject and the girl knew it. “He’s your dad. It’s going to bother you because we’re literally wired to want our parents' acceptance. It’s human nature.” Gentle swiping over his eyes got the pencil liner off, but she was thorough with it. Besides, she had a feeling he’d prefer his eyes closed for this sort of talk.  “I’m sorry that it’s like that for you, H. I know my words won’t replace his but I’m extremely proud of you and all you’ve done. Hopefully he’ll come around and see all that the rest of us do but… if he doesn’t? That’s a him problem.” 

Harry didn’t know how she managed to always say the right things. The knot in his throat shrunk from the comfort she gave him, her tender handling of both his physical being and his heart. This was the reason he wanted more with her. Almost anyone could get him to nut off, but not a single other person made his heart feel like this. Just as she’d said earlier, he felt completely safe with her in a way he didn’t even know he needed. Before her, he hadn’t realized how uncomfortable he was around people, but she showed him a brand new point of view. 

In the past, he’d opened himself up slightly to one girl. One girl who had used him and fucked his best mate, who he caught in the act. It had walled up the rest of his emotions in iron, not wanting even a crack to get into him because why would he? He’d never thought she or he would do that to him, never had any suspicion until about a month before when he saw glances across the room- but it turned out it wasn’t just his birthday outing they’d been planning. 

Then this girl had come along with her warmth and rusted the iron, getting it worn and cracked until there was a Y/N shaped hole for her to fill. She was understanding of his somewhat snarky nature, never took it personally and had stuck by him even when he’d tried to push her away. 

There had only been one time when he had been somewhat successful and it made his stomach twist and chest ache when he thought about it. It was far earlier on In their friendship, a few weeks in actually. She’d caught him on a bad day, coming up to him outside with her chatterbox open and running asking if he wanted to go to the cafe with him and that she had a surprise- and he’d snapped at her. He’d been rougher with his words than he meant to, honest, but he wanted to be alone and said as much in a not as nice manner. He’d watched her shoulders drop and the sparkle quite literally leave her eye as she looked towards the ground with a nod as even then when he least deserved it, she tried to be understanding.

 Something in him cracked when he heard the slight quiver in her voice when she apologized for being annoying and he’d looked up to see tears in those eyes and… fuck. His stomach dropped to his feet, watching her bottom lip quiver as she reached into her bag and grabbed the candy bar she’d grabbed from the vending machine after her class had ended, handing it to him before she scurried off. It was clear she hadn’t been tearing up for attention from how quickly she had left him, and with a candy bar in hand he felt completely nauseous over how he’d treated her. 

He couldn’t shake the feeling even as he gathered his things and called out for her, throat thick as his bad day got worse only by his own accord. Her lack of presence was felt, coldness settling in his bones when he realized what he’d truly done. It was then that he vowed to never treat her like that again. Y/N had been the sweetest thing in the world to him, got him his fucking favorite candy and was excited to study with him and he’d gone and fucked it all up. Made her fucking cry. She’d been long gone by the time he stumbled back into the pathway but he was already trying to make it right.

In the end he had showed up at her door with a teddy bear in hand along with her favorite candy and some take away, feeling like a kicked puppy as she opened her door and he had seen her swollen eyes and lips. It had been the most heartbreaking thing he ever saw and he apologize profusely when she let him in even when he didn’t deserve it, hugging her on his own accord for the first time and running fingers through her hair as she insisted she forgave him. ‘Everyone has those days and I’m sensitive, I know.’ Is what she said. 

Some days even still he thought about that as he watched people take advantage of her and it made him even more motivated to take care of her. 

In these sort of moments it felt hard not to think about loving her. Even in his rough and tumble sort of persona, she treated him tenderly. Held his arm, brushed his hair back, fixed his tangled necklaces, Y/N had treated him with a delicacy that he didn’t know he needed. 

As soon as the makeup wipe was pulled away, he opened his eyes and cupped her cheek to pull her in for a kiss. It had already been hard to keep his lips to himself, but this situation… it was his new obsession. “You know you’re perfect, right?” He asked against his current addiction, pressing another kiss to them. “Just… I dunno how you always know how to say the right shit. It scares me sometimes, y’know? Sometimes it feels too good to be true, that you… that you’re some sorta dream, but you’re not. And now you’ve told me you’re mine, and M’really fucking nervous about fucking it up but I’m going to do everything I can to be the best for you. Alright?” 

The emotion had slipped off his tongue without his permission but for one of the first times in his life he didn’t regret it. Her lips curled against his in that breathtaking smile he adored, tossing the wipe to the side as she wrapped an arm around his neck. “Harry… I don’t expect perfection. I know relationships… they take time to build. You aren’t some sort of build-a-boyfriend to me. I like you because you’re you. I like the grumpy, sarcastic, scowly bits of you. I always have. You’ll fuck up, I’ll fuck up, it’ll be a whole thing and then guess what?” Pulling back, she took in his face with her soft gaze. “We’ll fix it up again and it’ll be stronger. As long as you don’t cheat on me? I’m yours. And we both know you really aren’t capable of that.”

Harry would rather saw his hand off than cheat. He’d seen what it had done to him, so putting anyone else through that would be disgusting on top of hating the concept to begin with. He’d cut off people he knew for cheating on their partners and wouldn’t hesitate to do it again. “M’glad you know.” He sighed. In a weird way, this talk was making him aroused. Hearing how she liked him, that she knew they’d work, it just… it did something to him. “You look perfect in my clothes.” That too. Yeah, that had something to do with the thickening happening in his pants.

“I like wearing them. I always have. I’ve had a bit of a crush on you for a while, you know.” She teased, leaning into his body and letting her tits press up against him as she kissed his jaw lightly. “It always made me feel like yours when you let me wear them.” 

“You’ve been mine.” The dark grumble of his voice was a telltale sign that the words had pleased him. “Regardless of title, you’ve been mine for a while.” It was true and the both of them knew it. Harry’s eyes had been blind to anything but her for a long time and it had been painfully obvious when he hadn’t been able to get it up for other people not too long after meeting her.  Or had to think about her in order to nut off. 

“I know.” The confirmation was warm as she felt his hand travel down to rest above her ass. “And I was hoping you’d been mine for a bit but I’m pretty sure I was. You like to talk when you’re getting head, huh?” The smile was teasing and maybe he should be flushed at that but it was just another layer of arousal for him to remember her on her knees with his cock tucked between puffy lips and drool down her pretty chin. 

“No, actually. Jus’ with you.” He said truthfully. “I was… more of a hit it and quit it with the other people if m’honest. Know I babbled a bit but it felt really fucking good.” They could both feel he was hard now and the awkwardness of the last encounter on his end was gone. “Never expected you to be filthy, though. Thought you’d be a bit more shy but… I like that you were gagging for it just as much as I was.” Over the fabric of his shirt he gripped her ass, a nice handful as he squeezed and watched her eyes flutter shut at the feeling. “I can’t wait to get my hands on you properly. I’ve been dying to taste you,’to feel you. But I need t’know what you like.” 

“A bit of leather and lace.” Was the answer. Long lashed eyes peered up at him as she tipped her head back to look at him. “Sweet and spice. Nice and mean. Be sweet to me and call me a slut again. Spank me and kiss it better. That’s what… it’s what I’ve always imagined with you.” Her words were slightly more hesitant now but she didn’t back down. “You can be a little rough with me as long as you baby me later. I’ve never been…” she paused for a moment as she bit her lip. “I’ve never been fucked right. People treat me like I’m some delicate little toy which, I can be and I like sometimes but… I’ve always known you’d be able to give me the deep one I want. The type to make me lose my breath. Right?” Her fingers curled around his wrist that still rested on her cheek and trailed it down to have his hand rest against her throat. “You can throw me around a bit and make me take it. I can still be a doll for you, but maybe one you use a little bit.” 

Jesus fucking Christ. 

Harry’s mouth was torn between being dryer than the desert and watering down his chin at her descriptors of what she wanted. His hands held her ass and her throat and she was handing herself over on a silver platter as his cock twitched in between them, eager to get to work on her. “Fuck me…” he whispered hoarsely, thumbing over the side of her neck before giving a tiny squeeze. Just a bit, watching her face as he did so. She melted almost immediately and it was then he got the confirmation that she'd been hand crafted for him. Eyes glazed over and a weak, precious whine escaping her mouth and vibrating against the hand covering her throat, he couldn’t hold himself back from kissing her hard. Gathering her as close as possible with his hand keeping its grip for half the kiss before releasing it and using it as a guide to keep her close. “You’re going to ruin me, and M’gonna love every fucking second of it.” 

—-

It had happened quite quickly. The buzz of the oven interrupted them, the only reason Harry even slightly entertained it was so he didn’t burn the place down. He had been quick to toss them on the counter and lost the oven not before picking her up and bringing her into his bedroom. 

“If I died right now, I’d be okay.” He whispered as he looked at her bare cunt. The panties had been discarded and his lips kissed her inner thighs, nosing over the sensitive skin and watching her react to him. “You’re so gorgeous. Smell so fucking good, Butterfly. Gonna have t’tear me away from this pussy.” It was not a joke. 

Kissing over the mound, he spread her open and gave a long lick over the expanse of her slight and yeah- yeah. He was addicted. Licking deeper into her, he felt himself melt into a frenzied version of himself as he let his tongue explore her. Fingers buried in his hair as she gripped him, stomach jumping as she panted at the feeling of his mouth on her. 

Harry had enjoyed giving head before, was no stranger to eating pussy, but this was different. There had never been this all encompassing need to make her cum over and over again on his tongue, that greed that settled in his gut as he heard her moan his name and spread her legs further for him. Welcoming him and his touch. 

He didn’t hold back. Y/N had told him what she wanted and he knew her well enough now to understand. 

“Sweet.” He mumbled against her. “So fuckin’ sweet. Course you are, Butterfly. Fuckin’ perfect, every inch.” Kissing her clit he felt her jump, chuckling as he did it again before licking over the sensitive pearl. “M’gonna make you cum on my tongue, and then M’gonna give you the fuck you needed. I’ll be so nice to you, baby. So sweet, get you nice and fucked out the way you need. Promise.” 

Harry was going to fulfill that promise. Wrapping his lips around her clit, he gave soft, pulsing suckles as he slipped a finger inside of her and felt her hips buck off the bed. 

It was only a introduction, a sneak peek of what he’d feel around his cock but he had to remind himself not to blow too early as he felt her clenched around his digit. Tight and hot and silky against his hand, he groaned against her cunt and nuzzled deeper into it as he settled in. 

“H-Harry… oh my god.” She sighed out, slowly grinding against his face. “Oh my god, you… you’re so good at this. I’ve never….” Never came from this, which was something that pissed him off when he put the pieces together but he knew he’d wear the title of the first one to be successful proudly. Ideally, no one else would ever have it again. He had no plans on giving this obsession up. 

He hummed against her, meeting her eyes as she looked down at him with her messy hair and her bitten lips, mouth opened in the cutest little ‘o’ shape and her brows furrowed. Her clit was throbbing against his tongue and he couldn’t get enough, sucking a bit harder as he added a second finger inside of her. 

“Oh fuck, oh- just like that. Your fingers are big.” She whimpered, making him chuckle against her. Of course they were compared to her own. He had imagined that exact thing in this bed, imagining her in her own room with her fingers stuffed inside her drippy cunt and his name peeling off hers lips as she made herself orgasm. 

Making himself pull back, he fucked his fingers into her and enjoyed every bit of the noise it made. He’d made her wet like this, he’d gotten her to be a sopping mess and he enjoyed every single second of feeling it on his fingertips. “I know, baby. But my cock is much bigger and I need to get you prepped for it. You’re plenty wet…” he purred, leaning over her and keeping her eyes as he pursed his lips and spit right over her clit. “Just need to make you cum and you’ll be nice n’ready for me.” 

There wasn’t a hint of hesitation as he went back in, spreading his spit with his tongue before returning to his motions. He could feel it in her actions, how she clenched around his fingers, pulling her clit into his mouth over and over again as she got more and more wet around his fingers with difficulty not bucking into him. 

“I want it, I need it. I’ve been thinking a-about it for so long. I need you to fuck me, H.” Her voice was different than he’d ever heard it. More whiny, a tinge of desperation to the sweet sound he was obsessed with, and every bit of hot as he knew it would be. 

“I will, baby. Promise. Jus’ let go for me. I can feel you’re close.” He coaxed, curling his fingers just so and watching as her head fell back against the duvet as his lips continued the pull of her clit. 

It was hotter than he could’ve imagined. When she came a few minutes later, he watched her hand grip his hair and the other her own breast as she let out the prettiest noises and whines of his name as she trembled, hips bucking again into his mouth as she tumbled over the edge.

He held her steady with a happy noise, pulling off her clit with one last soft suckle and a kiss but kept his fingers inside of her as he moved back up her body to kiss her mouth. She welcomed it, both hands grabbing his face and not minding the mess she made on his chin and nose from his healthy exploration of her. Mumbled of praised were echoed between their kisses, slow pumps of his fingers working her through the orgasm as she rocked her hips into his hand. 

“Harry, I need it.” Her eyes met his. “I’m clean, I just- I need it, I need you inside me now.” Her neediness wasn’t something he’d been privy to before and it was more than satisfying, but he had to admit that what made him feel even better was knowing she wanted to go bare. He’d

Gotten tested just a few weeks ago at his appointment which was a bit of serendipity, he supposed, because now he was going to get what he had been stroking off to the most. 

“Yeah? Y’sure?” He whispered, watching her nod as he slowly pulled his fingers from her cunt and quickly cupped over it, soothing her. “You’re a dream. Y’know that, baby?” A laugh of disbelief echoed from his chest as he slowly pulled his hand back and slipped his pants off. His shirt had been tossed in the midst of things and he wanted hers off too, even if the idea of fucking her in his tee shirt was appealing. Later. 

She was receptive to it, letting him tug it off and exposing her to him again. 

He had to take a moment to simply enjoy her. 

Harry had always appreciated how beautiful she was but he also had to take a second to be thankful that she let him see her at her most vulnerable. That he got to see her in the most delicate state, one he was going to be the only one to see. Spread thighs and bare tits and soft tummy, all his. His, his, his. 

“M’so happy you’re mine.” He whispered, running a hand over her stomach as his other fisted his cock. “You are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. Not jus’ your body but your whole being. And I hope you know how much it means t’me that you’re letting me be yours too.” It hit him then, watching her peer up at him. He was being entrusted with a damn near golden heart and there were no plans on doing anything but cherishing it. 

“H…” she whispered, motioning him to come to her. He did, as he always will, buttoning their lips together as he nudged his tip through her wet slit and felt her sigh, wrapping her legs around his hips. “You are perfect. I adore you and- and I’m happy you’re letting me be yours too. You make me feel so good in all the ways possible and I just want to be as close as I can get.” 

There was no room left for debate. 

He began to push into her, watching her face as he filled her. It was slow at first, letting himself pace themselves considering he knew very early on that this would have to be a multiple round night because there was no way he’d be satisfied with just one. Y/N had been the object of his affections for a long while now and finally getting to be with her in the way he’d craved had lit him up. 

“There we are…” he whispered as he was fully inside of her. “You feel so good on me, Butterfly.” A kiss pressed to her lips, slow rocking into her for the beginning of this. The man fully intended to give her what she wanted but the first few moments would be tender and soft, show a true appreciation of her. The soft yellow light of his lamp next to his bed lit up the side of her face, shadows across the other side. Her hand held his bicep and the other on the back of his neck as she let out a shuddering breath, eyes fluttering shut as he pressed kisses all over her face.

It was a high, feeling her heat on him. She was everywhere, capturing every bit of him yet again. Tugging him deeper into a trap he had no plans on escaping from. The slow rocking of their hips garnered a hitch in her breath, still sensitive from her orgasm moments ago but taking in every moment she could. Every second felt special and precious. 

“You don’t even know….” He breathed. “Don’t even know how much I think about this. Made me feel like a perv for a bit, seeing you in my shirt last week… then you crawled into my lap and you ruined me.” It was hard to keep it from spilling out.  “I couldn’t run anymore from how you m-make me feel. And then y’put your mouth on me, near begged to, made me feel fucking crazy. I’ve been waiting all week to get my hands on you again… but this is the best day.” The fact that she was officially his and she was holding on to him, letting out a sweet sigh as he began to pull out the slightest bit and pushed back in. 

“I thought about it too.” She admitted, though it felt hard to talk. “I wanted this and-and I wanted you and m’so happy right now.” Her eyes watered a bit and fuck, fuck, fuck.  He cooed, shaking his head as he kissed her again. His sweet girl, crying because she had wanted him just as much as he had wanted her. 

“M’yours, Butterfly. All yours, and… M’not gonna let you go. Promise. You can have me as many times, as many days, as you want.” The man doubted that she’d ever truly understand how much this meant to him, how much she meant to him. That she’d look past his shitty attitude and stuck by him long enough to see the real parts, the softer ones. Hell, she made him want a relationship when he had never thought he’d want one again.

Harry was unequivocally hers, body and heart.

It stayed slow for a while, deep kisses and soft moans, but he could feel her start to get restless. He was very aware of part of his appeal to her- the rough and tumble. So when he felt her start to squirm, he took her throat again and held her back down, keeping his slow pumps as he watched her eyes hood and a soft mewl fall from her lips as she clenched around his cock. “Impatient girl. You’re tryin’ to rush me, hm?” He whispered, squeezing the sides of her throat momentarily. “I told you I’d fuck you right. But I wanted to appreciate you, make you feel how much I adore you. Is that not enough for my girl?” 

Y/N shook her head, panting as her legs tightened around his waist. “M’sorry.  I’m not trying to rush you, promise. I just feel so good n’I want more.” 

“Of course she does. Pretty little doll wants some more.” He crooned, clicking his tongue. “Being stuffed to the brim and stretching that tiny cunt isn’t enough for you. You told me about this, warned me. Told me you liked a bit of both.” Pulling out a bit more, he slid back in with a bit of force that caught her breath. “So you’re tired of being my sweet girl… you want to be a whore?”

There was something about the delicacy in the way he said it, the way it was silky and smooth and so unlike how the word would usually be delivered that had her moaning out loud. He was so, so nice to her and she loved it but it was clear she needed some more. Thankfully she had come to the right place. 

“Okay, okay. You want t’be a cute little slut. I see how it is, my darling.” He grinned, containing the slightly rougher pace. “Jus’ let me look at this gorgeous face a bit longer, and then I’ll flip you on your hands and knees so you can bury your face into the bed while I make you cum.” 

Harry had a hard time controlling himself knowing that she wanted to be roughed up. His angelic Y/N, wanted to be pounded out into the mattress. The original thought was that he’d have to work her up to that and see if she liked it, maybe a spank or two, but here she was. Gushing on her cock from the mere mention of being fucked harder. 

“Do you want me to spank that pretty ass?” He questioned, listening to the squelch of her cunt with each pass inside of her. His personal heaven. “Make it hot? How much do you want, Butterfly?” 

“I want anything.” She promised. “Please spank me and- and choke. I want to feel it tomorrow.” It was apparent now that she really did crave it, bucking into his thrusts and getting wetter the harder he got. He was going to have such a good time learning her body. How it ticked, what got her off, what made her squirm. It was a whole new facet to their relationship that he was giddy to explore. 

“I’ll give you anything you want, my gorgeous girl.” He promised. “Make the prettiest fuck doll out of you.” 

Harry kept his promise. 

Y/N squealed as he pulled out, flipping her over and hissed at his hands spreading each side of her ass open. “Look at you… you piece of art.” He sighed. “M’gonna mark this canvas up. Never imagined bruising you before but… what my girl wants, she gets.”

The first spank was a quick one, making her yelp as he stuffed himself back into her needy hole. It was exposing her, letting him have access to her cunt and ass and it was obviously exhilarating from how she clenched before pushing back into him for more. “You liked it.” The man smirked, squeezing the soft flesh in his hands. “We’re going to get on perfectly in the bedroom, aren’t we Butterfly?” 

From there, Harry let loose. Keeping a hand on her hip and the other holding her ass, giving swats to the skin as he fucked into her deep and thorough. He watched in awe as her ass rippled every time it met his thighs, the sound of skin slapping and her whimpers filling his bedroom. Her cunt was hot and so fucking wet he was surprised he hadn’t slipped out yet, creamy and soft but keeping him in tight. 

He’s heard Y/N babble before, but all she could come up with was whimpers and whines of his name, more, and again when he smacked the round of her ass. It was unexpected, but he was eating up every single movement, every noise she squeaked out. It felt incredible to know he was the one doing it. He had been the one to make her lose that soft shell and got deep into the underbelly, literally and metaphorically, burying deep inside of her with each tuck. “That’s my girl, taking it so well. I adore you, y’know that?” He cooed. “Love this hot cunt. Think M’gonna stay inside of it for a while, what do you think?” There was no answer but a punched out breath from his cock. “Mmm… I think so too. You did say you wanted t’be my whore.” The tone was slightly condescending but it was evident quickly that she reacted well to that. 

For all the time he’d been thinking about this, reality was much sweeter. With her taste on his tongue and her arousal smeared all over his cock and forming a creamy ring around the base of his cock with each squelching fuck into her needy and willing hole, he couldn’t have imagined something better. Something so unfiltered and raw, going bare inside his candy sweet girl who had overtaken his life. 

What really set her off, though, was his fingers tucking under her and finger her slippery and swollen clit, rubbing over it firmly, she moaned loud and clear, panting into the air as she clumsily grabbed his wrist as if to keep it there. Like he’d pull it away. “I see it baby, I feel it. You jus’ needed that clit played with. You’re gonna cum for me.” He breathed in an amazed chuckle. “Gonna cum all over my cock so I can fill you to the brim and keep you full and warm.” 

Y/N didn’t need much more than that. His cock in her tummy and his fingers at her clit, ass burning slightly from his swats. He felt it the moment it began, the fluttering around his prick and her hitch of breath as she got his name falling from her mouth and the slight tense of her body before she fell apart on him.

The prettiest sight he’d ever seen in his life. It was then that he swore he’d do his best to see it as many times as he possibly could, which would be a blessing or a curse depending on what the girl underneath him thought of overstimulation. 

Which was why even as he growled out, spilling into the perfect cunt that milked him, he kept thrusting. Slow and sloppy now, feeling his load dripping from her and onto the bed, he continued with his fingers on her clit as she squirmed. His cock fucked the cum right into her, massaging it into her walls as he kissed her skin. “‘Nother one. Gimme another one, my baby. Show me how much y’love being my sweet little whore.”

The sensitivity was probably to blame with how fast the second one came, shaking slightly as she let out the weakest whine of his name before pushing his hand away. Even though he could’ve done it over and over, he hummed and listened to her cue, turning them onto their sides and kept himself snug inside of her. He’d clean her up in a bit, bring her to the shower, make sure she was fed her cinnamon rolls, but for a little bit he wanted to bask in the bliss of having a dream come true. 

“S’okay, Butterfly. I’ve got you.” He nudged his nose against her neck, placing another chaste kiss there as she folded their fingers together. “Now you can fly home to me.” 

—-

It was far too late for cinnamon rolls if a normal person had any say, but thankfully they didn’t. Y/N sat on the counter with her hair placed back into that messy updo and his shirt on her torso while he had been convinced to wear his boxers while in the kitchen, dipping the microwave reheated cinnamon rolls in the icing. 

“I’ve got to teach you how to make them from scratch.” His girl sighed, kicking her feet as they dangled off the counter. 

“What, is my store bought hot food enough for you?” He pouted in faux offense, but luckily she didn’t fall for it. 

“You know that’s not the case. I love that you buy me some to have when I’m here.” A sugary kiss was given to his bottom lip, but she pulled away too fast to deepen it. A shame if you asked him. “It’s just, y’know, it would be fun to do together. There’s plenty of time to… hang out while the dough rises, and stuff like that.” 

Harry’s brows shot up at the insinuation, the unexpected laugh barking through the kitchen as he lowers his half ripped cinnamon roll to the plate. “I’ve created a little monster, haven’t I?” The shit eating from on his face showed no sign of regret, though. “One fuck and I’ve corrupted you. Sweet little thing turned into a needy pup in heat.” He paused before pointing a finger smeared with cinnamon sugar on it in her face. “Or have I just uncovered something that was in front of my face this whole time? Innocent act?” 

Y/N answered by leaning forward to take his finger into her mouth, sucking on it slowly and flicking her tongue over the tip before pulling back on it. 

There was no doubt now he’d found his perfect match, even if it was his complete opposite. Maybe they weren’t as different as he thought.

[ffg7]

The Science Behind THE Mingi Crashout

On today's episode of talking very confidently about things I know nothing about, the topic is Yungi (pt 1 out of 3). I would like to start off this essay by saying I don’t think either of them are or were into each other in the gay way (whether they’re into men at all I do not know, and I honestly don’t consider it relevant to this conversation), and even if someone had a crush on the other, it probably was Yunho (I will further elaborate on that on Yunho’s part). Mingi does not have the necessary subtlety to do the multiple-year-long gay yearning a lot of the shippers like to credit him for. If Mingi was into Yunho, Yunho would know, and I genuinely do not believe he would be chill about it. He’s a perfectionist who curates his public image almost obsessively. Mingi being into him would be the ultimate curve ball. Whether the feeling was reciprocated or not, it would put an immediate end to the fanservice. He’s a control freak through and through, and genuine attraction is too unpredictable of an external factor to introduce to the whole gay-for-pay, flirting-with-the audience-by-flirting-with-each-other bit.

This, however, does not disprove the fact that Mingi fucking loves him. Camera be damned, he regularly cuts open his chest, plucks his heart out and hands it to Yunho with an expression that says “Do you like it?”. It’s a shocking amount of transparency to display in privacy, let alone in front of an audience. And Mingi does that shit often. He does it so often, that, every time they do the forced and slightly uncomfortable sit-around-and-talk-about-our-feelings variety bit, Yunho preemptively gives him the please God, please don’t do this right now look. And although I think being this candid on camera cannot be good for him, I can’t help but find it admirable. The amount of emotional intelligence it takes to be able to not only recognize your own feelings to this extent, but to be able to express them eloquently and without inhibition is honestly impressive.

What surprises me even more, is that he makes these grand statements, without expecting Yunho to reciprocate. He lets him laugh, blush and deflect, and as long as he lives up to his standards in their private time, he does not mind having him play hard to get. Which brings me to my main point.

The Science behind the Mingi Crashout.

I have no doubt that Mingi knows exactly what he wants out of every relationship in his life. That extends to Yunho as well, whom I believe he sees as an extension of himself. To him they are a Unit, both in life and at work. He puts Yunho on a pedestal above the rest of the members -and oftentimes other people in general- and when he doesn’t recognise that, the Mingi Crashout happens. It is not jealousy, it is annoyance that his perceived partner in life (because that’s what they are at this point) does not recognise their bond.

A good example of this is the infamous moral loyalty argument. It’s a clip most ateez enjoyers know by heart, but I’ll narrate it nonetheless.

The clip starts with Yunho (who’s wearing a fuckass purple top hat made out of cardboard), standing in front of a mirror, talking with Yeosang and Seonghwa. 

“You’re doing a live with Wooyoung?” Mingi who has just walked into the conversation asks. Yunho knows Mingi, so before he even turns to face him, he already knows he’s upset with him. There’s a reason, after all, why Mingi is the only member who’s seemingly out of the loop about the live.

He immediately goes on the offensive.

“It was booked earlier than you.” He says, giving him the full Yunho experience, bobba eyes focused on him, with a polite smile that’s threatening to leave his face at any minute now. His expression is saying, not now dude. If Seonghwa had not intervened, he would have taken the hint.

“Mingi’s upset again.” Seonghwa says, doing what he usually does, but rarely gets credit for. He instigates. Yunho, riding the high of Seonghwa’s approval, takes a jab at Mingi. This is the first of three occasions where Yunho has the chance to deflate the situation, but accidentally escalates.

“Why are you even upset?”

Mingi, who was just about to leave this conversation, gets annoyed. 

“I can’t believe this.” He says, clearly flabbergasted. He knows that Yunho knows why he’s upset. Yunho is restless.

“Why?” He keeps asking, failing once again to let the storm pass. Mingi isn’t like him, if you ask him why he feels a certain way, he will tell you. And he does.

“I always film reels with you, but why do you never ask me to film one?” He complains. He tries to keep his voice somewhat playful, but his face is dead serious. If he smiles, it’s out of awkwardness. Mingi’s stance is clear. He thinks that Yunho is betraying Yungi, the work unit. In a group as competitive as ateez, them being a duo is something that works for the both of them well enough. They have different niches. Filming together helps them both expand their audience, without necessarily clashing with each other. And yet Yunho had chosen to do a live with Wooyoung, who is less of an amplifier and more of an active competitor.

 Yunho gets that, so Yunho, as he does, deflects.

“I didn’t ask him to do it. It was a promise with Atiny.” 

This isn’t good enough for Mingi, and he does the closest thing to sending a “k.” message that he can manage in a face-to-face conversation. He’s not pleased with Yunho’s response—because that wasn’t what he asked. He doesn’t care who arranged it; he cares that Yunho didn’t try to plan something for the two of them to do together. Still, Mingi has always been relatively reasonable, so it’s clear he’s about to let it go. Seonghwa is pointing a camera towards them after all.

Yunho and his almost obsessive need to take control of the narrative, drops the ball once again.

“This is a misunderstanding.” He demures. “Mingi gets jealous too much.” He confidently catapults himself into mutually assured distraction. Now Mingi is angry for real. His work oriented grievances turn personal. This is no longer about Yungi the work unit, this has become about Yungi the friendship.

“It’s not jealousy.” He laments, and then the line comes. “I prioritize relationships with people. You abandoned my moral loyalty.”

Now, I never understood why this line became as much of a meme as it did. Mingi is not joking around, he’s picking a fight. He might as well have been saying, I always put you first, but you never do.

Yunho, for the only time during this two minute clip, gets offended. The customer support smile disappears and his voice drops two octaves. He does not appreciate this. He might be lousy with his business obligations to Yungi, but he does not think this is true for their interpersonal relationship.

“I’ve planned it since the ninth grade.” Mingi prepares to drop one of the most romantic lines he’s ever said to Yunho on camera, right after calling him fake and a cheater.

“What?”

“Everything I do with you.” He says, rightfully giving Yunho whiplash. You cannot go from attacking someone’s character to declaring the importance of their presence in your life and not completely disorient them.

“I spend a lot of time with you!” Yunho whines. He feels wronged. He takes care of Mingi. He knows he takes care of Mingi. The accusations do not please him.

“So you forgot how precious our time spent together is?”

At this point, Seonghwa, the real instigator of this fight jumps in. He has gotten what he wanted and has decided it is time for the argument to end.

“This is what Ateez fights about in the waiting room.” He declares, Yunho looks into the camera and he’s back in business mode. The customer support smile returns, but it does not reach his eyes. His fingers are gripping into that chair for dear life.

“Is it wrong to do a vlive for atiny?” He deflects again. Next to him, Yeosang who has been anxiously jumping in between jabs, trying to defuse the situation, pretends to eat popcorn. His pretty face cannot fool me, he did not enjoy that.

The clip ends, and although Mingi won the battle, the real winner of this situation is Seonghwa, who masterfully directed both the camera and Yungi into turning Mingi’s mini sulking moment into a full blown argument. Meanwhile, Yunho’s still wearing his little cardboard tophat.

I only have one closing statement to make.

KQ, you should’ve edited that out.

[lenaellsi]

after my latest rewatch I am even more convinced that crowley really doesn't have the intense self-loathing issues he's commonly depicted with. like he has some regrets and bad memories and insecurities like everyone does, and he's under an insane amount of stress basically always, but he's very confident in who he is. he's not particularly happy about being a demon, but that isn't the same thing as hating himself for it. he hates hell, not himself.

like. he’s not upset about being called one of “the bad guys” because he agrees, he’s upset because he knows aziraphale is wrong, and because this is evidence that aziraphale still believes in a philosophy that has divided them since even before his fall. he has never once considered himself less than aziraphale or any other angel. I think it's clear that he's pretty offended by that implication, actually!

“crawly” as a name is too squirming-at-your-feet-ish for him because he knows who he is, and he sees value in that person. his depression and his worrying relationship with his own life and safety come from his feelings on god and predestination, not from self-loathing. crowley does not believe in the system. he doesn’t believe in the idea that people are purely good or evil, and he’s sure enough of himself to know that he's not either. that's why he's able to make the choices he does. he's able to act in the gray spaces between heaven and hell (see: job, the flood, the "virtues of poverty," armageddon, etc etc) because he is confident enough to make those decisions without worrying about what the powers that be say about what's "right" and "wrong."

that doesn’t mean that he’s not self-conscious. he’s very concerned with what humans think of him, what aziraphale thinks of him, and (out of self-preservation) what hell thinks of him. he hides his eyes and puts on a cool, flashy persona to hide the more vulnerable parts of himself. I think everyone does that, to a degree, but it's especially obvious in crowley because of how it manifests in his glasses. he's been burned (literally) before, and he knows better than to show weakness when he could be hurt like that again.

and re: the "I never meant to fall" thing--he's upset about being a demon, yeah, because the fall sounds like it sucked, and his job tortures him when he's Good or just Bad in the wrong way, and he's deeply lonely, and the love of his life has a complex about their relationship, and he's trapped in a system where he has to blindly follow one of two nearly-identical sets of bullshit morality rules or be executed. but again, he's mad at god, heaven, and hell for all of that. I'm sure he's angry at himself for all sorts of reasons often enough, because crowley is generally a pretty angry person, but he doesn't hate himself in any sort of existential "I am an unlovable monster" way.

maybe sometimes he regrets falling. maybe sometimes he thinks it would be easier if he never did. maybe sometimes he hates his fucking line manager and wishes he could do any other job for a while. but no part of crowley thinks that he is any worse of a person after the fall, or any less worthy of aziraphale's company. he just thinks aziraphale thinks that, because of the amount of times aziraphale has told him so.

[i-love-zelda-16]

dear precious lu fandom, this post is for you <3

I LOVE YOU ALL DEARLY! you are all super cool, amazing, and incredibly talented!!!!!!! no, not someone else, you 🫵. <3

but um. i’m not mad at all, i’m just trying to maybe help calm this fandom down a bit. can we please stop the fanon vs. canon arguing?? or dissing others because they ‘haven’t played the games’?

i’ve tried to stay out of this. but when i search #linked universe, it pains me to see my dear fandom and fellow friends upset. this has been weighing on me. i’m not usually this serious, as those who know me probably recognize.

heacanons are amazing. headcanons are cool. i want to be able to headcanon that Hyrule is a sweet lil bean and Wind is a chaotic lil sailor pirate boy without being flamed, but recently we’ve been dissing each others’ headcanons. just because you disagree with someone’s headcanon does not mean you can ‘correct’ them or tell them it’s a bad headcanon. they love the blorbos too. in the nicest way possible, mind your own business please.

second, let’s not diss people for ‘not playing the games’. for example, i haven’t beaten Link’s Awakening. does that mean i can’t write Legend/Marin angst? no, of course i can write Legend/Marin angst, i love writing that! or even simpler, i’ve seen just straight up teasing, bullying, or saying someone’s ‘not a true fan’ because they haven’t beaten all the games. again, in the nicest way possible, this is ridiculous; not everyone can afford to beat all the games and not everyone has the time to beat all the games. from what i’ve seen, it seems almost like some people won’t be satisfied until the person they’re conversing with has 100%ed all the games— again, a crazy expectation. i personally don’t care if you’ve played all 21 canon games or none at all and you barely know anything about Zelda; i will treat you with kindness and respect, and i really hope others would do the same. shouldn’t we be trying to be kind and encourage new fans to enter the fandom?

everyone, please consider this your wakeup call. and please stop arguing. <3

again, i love you all dearly, and this fandom is the best thing that has ever happened to me. but please consider what i have to say <3

THANK YOU SINCERELY IF YOU READ THIS FAR!!!!!! <3

[stlllle]

(English isn’t my first language, ignore any mistakes pls 🫠)

ABC Relationship Headcanons – Chishiya Shuntaro

Masterlist –[link]

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Chishiya is not the physical type… and not the verbal one either.

The most affection you’ll get without asking is a prolonged stare… a subtle shoulder touch… or a sarcastic comment like:

"You're less annoying than most people."

(Which, coming from him… is basically an "I love you").

But… if you catch him on a REALLY good day… maybe a quick head pat when you're half asleep.

---

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

It probably started with him annoying you on purpose just to test your patience.

You clapped back… he found it amusing… and now you’re part of the 0.02% of people he tolerates.

As a friend, he’s the type who disappears for weeks, but if you call him at 3AM saying you need help… he’ll show up.

No questions. No judgment. Just that little side smirk and a "You're an idiot, aren't you?"

---

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

HATES it.

But does it anyway.

When you beg a lot… or when you're genuinely upset.

At first, he's stiff as a board, like a cat forced into a hug… but after a while, he’ll relax (just a little) and hold you by the waist, face buried in your neck so no one sees he’s enjoying it.

---

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

He never dreamed of marriage, kids, and a dog in the backyard.

But… if it’s with you… he might consider it.

Cooking? Basic survival level.

Cleaning? Only the essentials.

But he’s got a mild obsession with organization… everything has to be in its right place or he’ll have an internal meltdown.

---

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Cold.

Direct.

No sugarcoating.

He’d say it to your face, with that icy stare:

"I think we’re done. There’s no point in continuing."

And then he’d turn around and leave.

But once he’s home… he’d lay awake staring at the ceiling…

Wondering if he did the right thing…

(But he’d never admit it).

---

F = Fiancé(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Marriage???

Only if you propose on your knees… and even then, he’d make jokes about it.

But… if he REALLY loves you… deep deep down… he’d think about it.

After YEARS of denial.

---

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

He’s gentle in the weirdest ways.

Says harsh things… but takes care of you when you’re sick.

Calls you an idiot… but holds your hand when he senses you’re scared.

His affection is lazy and clumsy… but real.

---

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Official answer: "I don’t like hugs."

Real answer: He likes… but only his own hugs.

Meaning: He’ll randomly pull you into a tight, warm hug…

Hold you for a second too long…

Then push you away like it never happened.

---

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

Literal years.

When it finally happens… it’ll be at the most random time ever.

Like after a nasty fight or on a boring afternoon while handing you the TV remote.

"I love you… don’t get used to it."

---

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

He never shows it… in public.

But later… the king of passive-aggressive comments.

Expect things like:

"Funny… I thought you had better taste."

Or hours of being ignored just to mess with your head.

---

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Slow. Teasing. Weak-knee-inducing.

He loves kissing the corner of your mouth… your neck… your shoulder (don’t ask why, he just does).

Loves being kissed along his jawline and behind his ear… but will pretend to hate it.

---

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

Looks at them like they’re an alien species.

Zero patience. Zero interest.

But if a kid likes him… he’ll give in.

Might even teach them bad stuff on purpose just to watch the parents freak out.

---

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Silence.

He’ll wake up, stare at you for five minutes without saying anything…

Then mumble:

"Is there coffee?"

But… he’ll ruffle your hair before getting out of bed.

---

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

He loves the silence of midnight.

If you stay awake, you’ll have deep philosophical talks in the dark…

If not… he’ll just stare at you sleeping, with that stupid little smirk like:

"So vulnerable…"

---

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Light years later.

He reveals himself in microscopic doses…

And when he does drop something personal, it’ll be in the most random context ever.

Like… childhood trauma casually mentioned over lunch.

---

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

He seems calm… but internally?

He’s already killed you 18 times.

His patience is thin… and when it breaks…

It’s with words sharp enough to cut glass.

---

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you?)

ABSURDLY GOOD MEMORY.

He remembers your favorite color, how you like your coffee, your favorite show, what you wore on your first date…

But if you ask…

He’ll pretend he doesn’t remember a thing.

---

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

The day he realized he could be 100% himself with you.

No masks. No sarcasm.

Just him.

Probably a random night when you two sat in comfortable silence for hours.

---

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

He protects with intelligence.

He’ll anticipate dangers way before they happen.

He’ll manipulate situations behind the scenes to keep you safe…

And if you try to protect him?

He’ll get pissed.

"I don’t need a babysitter."

---

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Zero visible effort.

But behind the scenes?

He plans everything.

Chooses your favorite restaurant, the perfect gift…

And makes it look like a coincidence.

---

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

He’d never admit it…

But YES.

Hair always perfect, clothes fitting just right…

And that faint, subtle cologne that makes you dizzy.

---

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Absolutely.

But he’d rather die than admit it.

If you left…

He’d act fine…

But inside?

Completely shattered

---

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

He loves playing with your hands while pretending not to pay attention to you.

Like… tracing your fingers… fiddling with your rings…

But if you mention it, he’ll immediately pull away and say:

"I was just bored."

---

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

Loud people.

Unnecessary drama.

Pointless jealousy.

And most of all: emotional games he didn’t start.

If you try to make him jealous on purpose…

He’ll make you regret it.

---

Z = Zzz (What are their sleep habits?)

Sleeps late.

Reads or scrolls on his phone until 3AM.

Sleeps on his side, one arm thrown over his head.

And if you sleep with him…

He’ll steal all the blankets.

---part 2----

[julietcpulet]

Shimao is not canon.

(Spoilers) I responded to someone else’s post kind of in this spirit but thought I would write my own. In truth I don’t think I should have to say this but Shimao isn’t canon. The interaction between Maomao and Shisui, all the touching and things, added by the animators. In the light novel there’s none of that mentioned. They’re friends yes, although there’s even a complexity to that and a debate on how deep the friendship went from either side but we know they had a bond given Maomao’s prayer for Shisui at the end. However there’s no romantic undertone to any of this. I think the anime simply caused more problems by adding scenes that ended up being interpreted by the fandom in this light. If this stayed in the realm of headcanon, maybe not an issue although I still don’t see the need to ship them but the problem is that people have gone on to hate on the actual, canon core ship of the series, Jinmao, which was my main worry.

Even before Shisui and Maomao’s latest interactions people saw some of Jinshi’s actions as “problematic” which, even if they’re wrong about it, made an opening for them seeing his future behavior as worse if they now view Maomao as being interested in Shisui or as their “love” being thwarted due to the rebellion. It’s a silly concept because Maomao was literally kidnapped by Shisui, their friendship was on thin ice at the end and the dynamic in the original novel material is in no way romantic. But I’ve seen people are now upset at Jinshi’s later actions in rescuing Maomao, the carriage and the Verdigris House because he just doesn’t get that she’s repressing herself or wanted to stay with Shisui. This is not true in the slightest, actually there’s evidence to suggest she was hoping Jinshi would rescue her and further meaning in being separated from him in the last part of the novel. However this is what comes from the anime breaking with canon and giving the implication of Maomao’s affection for Shisui being deeper than the novel presents. Yes, she cared for her as a friend but there is nothing deeper between the two as people are taking from the anime.

These kinds of changes cause problems not just for shipping but overall character development because although Maomao may have been physically affectionate with say Xiaolan, it was more of a sisterly fashion and sometimes like allowing a one-sided hug. Otherwise her character is not “touchy” and so it factors into later storylines when she does let her guard down and casually touches Jinshi who’s the first person she begins doing this with without thinking about it. The show making Shisui that person takes away from her development as a character. Especially when we consider how Maomao appears put off when Jinshi touches her so there’s a lot of “see she’s really a closet lesbian” posts going around, a sentiment that’s not canon or true. But that’s how her development can be changed because the anime decided to give Shisui the preference as the person Maomao was comfortable reaching out to first vs. Jinshi, hence why I think these subtle details matter. I simply hope that people will realize the animators may have decided to include these things and Shimao may be a headcanon ship but it’s not realized in the novels at all. So to hate on Jinshi or Jinmao as a ship or insist Shimao is canon is going against actual canon which if you don’t like that it’s your preference but maybe go watch something else and don’t disparage the fans who are fine with the original material.

[ooooo-mcyt]

I feel like I’m alone in fandom in thinking Scott (and Cleo) were completely justified in their reactions to their soulbound? Because they weren’t petty in the first session, they were firm, they’d been abandoned and forced to take care of people who weren’t even there or risk dying while watching everyone around them settle into their perfect pairs and shove everyone else aside, so they decided they wouldn’t do that, they’d choose the person who’d been there to provide support and food and a sympathetic ear, and when they said so to Pearl and Martyn, Martyn attacked Cleo! Hit her with an axe until Scott got between the two of them with a shield while Pearl just stood back. I get how them going off on their own feels like abandonment to Pearl and I have a lot of sympathy for her and what she goes through in Double Life, I just don’t get why the fandom sees Scott as having acted unfairly to Pearl - it was Martyn who left her alone, after all, and they didn’t get to talk again until after Scott and Cleo’s start of session crits started and from there, their relationship deteriorated rapidly on both sides, but I don’t really think that can be considered without also considering Martyn and Cleo, whose relationship started and ended in violence. If you could offer any insight into the Scott and Pearl stuff, I’d love to hear it! Your meta is always very interesting and tends to match up well with a lot of my own thoughts so I hope it’ll help me figure them out or give me something new to consider.

I have mixed feelings on the relationship between Pearl and Scott specifically in Double Life.

Scott had every right to feel upset with the setup of the season, and every right to choose his partner. Pearl wasn't 'owed' any kind of relationship, and it's completely reasonable that Scott wouldn't jump at the concept of being tied by 'fate' to someone who wasn't even there- and took quite a bit of damage- during the first episode.

However, I also think Scott was unempathetic toward Pearl during the first episode too. Yes, Scott had a right to feel upset, but Pearl didn't do anything wrong by not jumping to find him first thing in the episode, and I think it was unfair for Scott to frame his discomfort and frustration as a major wrongdoing on Pearl's part. And while Scott didn't owe Pearl a relationship, I also feel like, especially given their history from the previous season, Scott was callous toward her feelings.

It's complicated. Scott could have- probably should have- been more empathetic toward Pearl, less accusatory and dismissive. I do think he was harsh, and I do think a lot of his anger in the beginning was misplaced, but he was not half as cruel as some people claim, and he did not set out to intentionally isolate her, and I think a lot of people hold Scott far too responsible for everything else than happened to Pearl in Double Life.

Pearl was rejected by Martyn, probably just as harshly as by Scott, to be honest. Pearl was insulted and called a curse by Ren. Pearl tried to be friendly with the Ranchers just for that to fall apart and leave her feeling even more alone too.

I'd say Pearl was also overly hostile and pushy with Scott, moreso than he deserved. I think she had a lot of anger and grief, I think she was generally unwell, and I think Pearl misplaced a lot of that onto Scott since he was the first person to reject her.

I think Scott and Pearl both contributed to the breakdown in their relationship because of misplaced anger.

Pearl was a symbol of a loss of agency to Scott, a cage, a chain, the universe forcibly binding him to someone else without his decision. Pearl made this worse, both by going off alone and taking significant damage in the first episode, and by later going out of her way to taunt and target him. Pearl wasn't trying to take away his choice, but she was proof he had very little.

Similarly, Scott was a symbol of isolation and rejection to Pearl, mocking her, damning her to loneliness, labeling her as curse, a person not worthy of a soulmate. Scott made this worse with his callousness from the beginning, blaming Pearl for things that weren't really wrong of her. Scott wasn't trying to isolate her, but he was proof she was utterly alone.

A lot of their resentment toward each other was less tied to what the other did to them (although they both did things to hurt the other) and more about what the other represented to them, real and valid hurt or repulsion mixing with misplaced anger being pinned to a 'reasonable' target.

(also scott and pearl's resentment was very tied in with cleo and martyn's resentment which is a whole other topic and admittedly it's been quite a while since i've watched martyn or cleo's double life pov so i can't comment too much on that half of the divorce quartet right now)

Generally it bugs me when the fandom tries to make Scott and Pearl's relationship in Double Life black and white, as if one of them was just selfishly trying to hurt the other, when I really see their relationship as a situation built on- half valid and half misplaced- mutual resentment in which they both hurt each other and granted the other far too little sympathy.