#and by we i don't actually mean we because my state insect is not the honey bee

[ineffable-gallimaufry]

petition for every state that has the european honey bee as their state insect (except utah; i feel they're committed to the honey bee life) to change their state insect to a bee species native to the state. if minnesota can have the rusty patched bumblebee as their state bee, we can all do better

[aakeysmash]

ok ok, another one here:

reader being afraid of some insect and sukuna just teasing them cause of it but still taking the insect out of the house.

sukuna calmly walks into your room after hearing the highest scream he's ever heard someone make. he leans on your doorframe, one of his eyebrows raised and his hands in the pocket of his sweats.

"are you trying to permanently damage your vocal chords?" he asks your trembling form. you scream again, caught by surprise since you didn't hear his footsteps, then turn around. he's stunned when, in a matter of 0.2 seconds, he finds you curled around his leg.

"you look like a fucking toddler. you sounded like one, actually. are you a toddler?" he says while shaking his leg, trying to get you to stop gripping him.

"why didn't you come sooner if you were home?" you whine, still gripping his leg with all you've got. you've got that toddler strength in you, apparently.

"because i didn't want to have to remove blood from my clothes in case you were getting killed," he deadpans. you still, then get off of him and stand up.

"why don't you love me anymore?" you pout.

"just tell me where the fucking spider is, woman," he tells you, sighing, while rubbing his face. you gasp, pointing at his chest.

"so you knew!"

"girl, you've done this shit at least once a month since we started dating," he states. silence. you frown.

"we've been together since high school," he continues. silence, again. your frown deepens.

"we're 25," he finishes. you raise your hands in the air.

"okayyyy maybe i'm a bit dramatic. sue me for wanting to be saved by my egotistical, mean, big boyfriend who simply doesn't like me enough to come rescue me every time i need a knight in shining armor," you say, closing your eyes and placing the back of your hand on your forehead. you hear him huff and you open one eye. then he nudges you away, getting a napkin from your nightstand and catching the microscopic eight legged arachnid from the wall.

"there. happy?" he says, looking at you, bored.

"thank you babyyyy," you gush over to him, finally at peace, kissing his cheek sweetly.

suddenly, he gets far from you. you don't even have time to react: he straight up launches the napkin at your face, then hurries out of the room, laughing.

"SUKUNA RYOMEN, I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!"

that night, he sleeps on the couch. karma is a bitch, indeed.

[cheesycatz]

Worm in the Apple (the Wormton AU fic) is at 120k words! Obviously the worm guy loves apples, fruit, and sugary stuff in general, though it holds no nutritional value for him. It's fitting, since most of the "worms" found in apples are actually just some form of insect, just like how Wormton himself isn't an actual worm. Being as contradicting as possible is his whole thing, I suppose.

May blithering helminth codswallop posthaste be upon thee if thoust must ruminate over thine virulent and insiduous merchant Sir Spammington G. Spammington The Deceitful:

Anyways, I've been struggling to write the depressing crap, so I often like to imagine the ending where they can all be happy together in Castle Town. I interpret Castle Town as a place where darkners are less bound to fate, since it doesn't seem to manifest from the real world, and is made of pure darkness, whatever that means. Wormton wouldn't have to hide anymore, but he would very much be, uh, neutralized if he tries to infect anything. He wouldn't get to have sixteen identical feral worm children that look like slightly smaller mirror images of him crawling all around the place, unfortunately; Castle Town could do without a highly invasive species that eats and destroys everything. I imagine that he'd keep the suit jacket so that he actually has some pockets, as well as to hide himself a little bit. Malworms naturally like to stay outside of the spotlight, so he's not very comfortable without his disguise. Not that being crammed inside his disguise was much more comfortable, but, hey, what other option did he have?

I like to imagine the addisons getting stuck with Wormton in Castle Town due to it having greater population density. I'm considering making it so that they don't even know he's there at first, like those criminal cases where some guy is living in a family's attic for months unnoticed. He'll have the opportunity to harass Swatch, interact with other characters like Lancer, and send "mild" death threats to Rouxls. I think he'd avoid Kris and the other lightners. He tries to kill Kris and absorb the SOUL from the get-go, and the two of them lack that puppet connection, since Wormton never picked up the phone. Still, he does pick up on their stilted movements that mimic his own when he's puppeteering his disguise, and does realize that the SOUL is a little more controlling than he would want, so they eventually reach a peaceful conclusion (This AU follows the pacifist normal route. This cold-blooded mf would probably just go into hibernation and do absolutely nothing if the player did a Weird Route). He's still pissed about them taking his shadow crystal, even if the starry night sky it once let him witness will never shine through its surface again. Kris is such a gremlin from what we know that I think it would he sweet if he valued the fact that, while they find his puppet-like disguise creepy, they're unfazed by his real appearance. Kris can go on his "people I don't fantasize about murdering and eating regularly" list, which might just be his "nestmates :^]" list if he'd actually admit it

Back to writing about him hating himself so much that he can't fathom someone healing him unless it was a transactional favor, hiding in a locked closet with no stimulation because he thinks he's trying to kill Blue whenever he's in an instict-driven half-asleep state (emphasis on thinks), believing the only reason that Blue is worried about him hiding so much is because they want him to leave faster, understanding so little of his actual species that he becomes stressed when he does anything that "isn't normal," Having fits of anger and mental breakdowns and feeling bad about it afterwards, using the worst coping mechanisms known to man, and devouring an entire 16 inch regular crust meat lover's pizza in one sitting

Cover art concept as a lil treat. Probably won't actually draw it until I'm ready to start releasing chapters, but it's fun to think about for now. I'll do my best to live up to expectations as someone with zero experience writing fiction and long-form content in general o7

[alfredsolos]

I was scrolling through AO3 for Damian-centered fics. Mainly angst. And as usual, I came across a few Fear Gas fics which made me think.

I don't remember Damian ever getting into contact with Fear Gas in canon (If he did, please correct me). So most fic writers, when they need to use a scenario for Damian to be scared of, use his past in the LoA. Mainly his mother. Which is a good conclusion in my opinion, but I wanted to know more about this topic.

About what could be Damian's worst nightmare.

I have come to 3 general conclusions.

My research brought me to 3 comics: Deathstroke (2016), Teen Titans (2016), Batman And Robin (2011).

1) Starting with Deathstroke, I'll give you a little context here. Damian is working with Slade for the moment and they come across a villainess named Nightshade.

Nightshade has the ability to teleport herself or others, by passing through a place called Land of Nightshade. But this place subjects people to their worst nightmares. And she uses this power on Damian:

As you can see, when subjected to his worst nightmare, Damian sees Slade. He tells him that his worst fear, is the idea that him being Slade's son. Which is directly proportional to his reason for working alongside Slade.

I already made a post about this, but a little context here: Talia fakes a paternity test that states that Slade is Damian's actual father. Of course no one believes that, but Damian still goes with Slade for his own personal reasons.

Coming back to my point, it does make sense that, in that current mental state of his, he hates the idea of Slade being his father. Which could potentially affect his fears, and make it up to be the biggest.

But this could be a one time thing, and Damian's worst fear could still be something else.

Now for Teen Titans:

As you can see, Damian has a nightmare about Slade and ends up punching the mirror and hurting himself.

I wanted to put this up to, in a way, support the idea that Damian's worst fear is Slade. And it can be true because Slade did tried to kill him multiple times, kidnapped him, told him to his face that children like him should never get to grow up.

So among his 3 biggest fears that I've headcanoned, the first one is Slade.

2) Now coming to his second potential biggest fear/nightmare: His death.

This is pretty obvious I guess. His own mother killing him was pretty traumatic and caused him to have canonically horrible nightmares after his resurrection:

But when we examine this nightmare more, we can see that it's specifically showing us Talia and Ra's trying to resurrect Damian via the Lazarus Pit.

The most interesting part about this is that, this happened.

What I mean is, after Damian died and was buried, Talia stole Damian's body to resurrect him via the pit with the help of Ra's. But I don't remember ever seeing Bruce mention that to Damian.

So how did his mind came up with this kind of nightmare?

First option is that, he does not know that Talia had tried to resurrect him and his mind is playing tricks on him. This doesn't sound very likely to me, because the nightmare is just too specific.

Second option is that, when he was in Hell he somehow saw or felt what was happening to him and this particular event caused him severe trauma.

Personally, I prefer the second option.

3) Coming to his last potentially biggest fear is losing his loved ones, which is also from Batman and Robin. In this issue he gets a horrible nightmare, in which his entire family is stuck inside an aquarium and dying.

A little context on why did Damian suddenly had this type of nightmare: Prior to this, Joker kidnaps and tortures the entire batfamily. And by torture I mean torture.

He kills Jason's potential love interest. Makes Barbara marry him. Digs out Tim and Jason's dads' corpse out and mocks them. Dumps tons of insects onto Damian. Makes a joker gassed Batman attack Damian and so on...

After this whole ordeal everyone is left shaking and with nightmares of course.

But focusing on Damian, something also piqued my interest. It's the fact that even though all of his family members are in that tank, he only calls out for Alfred. So maybe this fear can be shrinked to Damian fearing the death of Alfred.

Which is highly possible, as Alfred was the person Damian was closest to. Even more so than Bruce. And same goes for Alfred I guess, because Bruce himself told Alfred, that Damian was like a son to Alfred.

So to conclude his 3 potential biggest fears:

1) Slade

2) His death/Getting resurrected via the pit.

3) Losing his love ones/Specifically losing Alfred.

Of course, this is all my own headcanons and intrepretations. So please tell me about your opinion on this.

What do you think is Damian's biggest fear?

[gemsofgreece]

As a Greek I will say it in English for the international audience.

I am very tired of this mentality some Greeks have over our own country. They praise foreign countries so much and spit on Greece. True that some phrases have:

"look how progressive x,y country is! They invented so much for their citizens meanwhile we live like insects here" "Greece is filthy, corrupt, poor but yeah great history"

Stoooop when many repeat the same thing over and over again it becomes so depressing to hear. I mean they complain and yet don't try to make Greece a better place to begin with when society has started losing empathy and positivity. Yes i know right know things are tough, but what's the point of beating your own country?

I feel you. Just a few days ago, I saw one of those billion facebook shorts comparing foreign countries with Greece, made by Greek immigrants. For those who do not know, there are two ways Greeks respond to these videos and they are both ridiculous; a) "oh my god Greece is the worst place in the galaxy, I am ashamed to say I am Greek" and b) "what's the point of having money and progress and actual justice if you can't have sun in the winter and you lock yourself in your house since 2 pm, there's no place like Greece". Even in that video which was trying to be fair and showed pros and cons for both, Greeks still were THAT dramatic. Honestly, does nobody in this country think like "well, interesting information, here's how I am thinking of starting acting and informing my social circle so we can be inspired by this video and improve on some matters individually and maybe this will become a thing in our community and also we will start voting much more cautiously and educate ourselves on politics". Nobody. Zero. Greeks log in on Facebook thinking they're going to battle. By the way, this is not just a Greek thing but it is very prominent in Greek social media.

My point is that this polarisation and negativity cause people to shit disproportionately on the country and others to defend it, also disproportionately. What personally angered me the most though was a woman who said "the Greek immigrants are actually the ones who love their country the most and because they see how bad it has gotten due to you the Greeks who are still there, they left because they could not bear it and it's THEY who are the better, cleverer, more civilized Greeks because they are educated, work abroad and their eyes are opened to how a functional state works". And my God, this was such a blame shifter. The reason some Greeks emigrate is because they love themselves and the opportunities they can have abroad the most, not because they love Greece the most. There is nothing wrong with that, the wrongness is in lying about it. If they loved Greece SOOOO much more than the Greeks who stayed behind and they were SOOOO eligible to create and contribute to a functional state, then they would have fucking stayed here and actually WORKED to make Greece a functional state, instead of looking judgementally and pretending to have insider knowledge from 900 miles away. Also, it's absolutely pathetic to imply the Greekswho are still in the country are lesser, worse people or less educated. No, some of us are very educated, thank you very much. And among all those who ruin the country, it's us both the educated and the not so educated who struggle all alone. But if half of those supposed enlightened Greeks who left the country had actually stayed and joined us, the dynamics of those who try to improve the country versus those who try to ruin it would have perhaps gradually changed to our advantage.

So this lady can spare me the crap... I have many friends who live abroad, some are perfectly happy, happier than they were here, some are considering returning, they are uncertain, some have already returned disappointed, all those people I refer to are VERY educated, very "civilized". Just do your thing folks, everyone is different but this superiority complex most Greeks develop the very moment they land on a foreign airport is ludicrous and totally indicative of the "Ellinaras syndrome" which they claim they loathe so much, ironically!

Then there are others who legitimately brainwash people "abandon the country, save yourselves" wtf are you all well? Like, sure, the country has many issues but chill let's all work this out together, we're neither the first nor the last who have issues.

[bayofwolves]

Rereading Rise and Fall

We're back unusually early to recap the penultimate, and my personal favourite, Spirit Animals book. If you don't know by now, these posts are essentially my notes from rereading the Spirit Animals books -- interesting details, stuff I missed and how I would change certain things. This is all part of my divine plan to revise and expand upon the series. Let's get into it!

This cover is one of my all-time favourites, apart from the short-haired Conor jumpscare (he has long hair in my universe). It's interesting how he is never shown with the axe he wields, only the shepherd's staff. I suppose they're striving for the most accurate portrayal of their characters on the covers, and Conor will always be a shepherd before he is a warrior.

Abeke's opinion of Shane seems to have deteriorated somewhat. In her first chapter, she doesn't think of him as a friend, only as an ally, and her attitude towards him is quite cold. This is most likely due to the fact that he is her jailer at this point. However, it got me thinking... it would have been kind of neat if Abeke's friendship with Shane slowly deteriorated over the course of these first six books. Perhaps because of what she sees him tolerate from his fellow soldiers, perhaps what she sees him do with his own hands. Perhaps both. She sees him do good, yes, but she sees the bad, too, and it makes her start to doubt him. When he saves her from the Conquerors and expresses his wish to switch sides, her faith in him soars -- of course he would do the right thing, she always believed he could -- only to come crashing down when he betrays her days later. I just think it would be more realistic if Abeke had some doubts about her Conqueror boyfriend as the war dragged on (she's not completely stupid, after all). If she chose to put them aside and trust in him, it would make his betrayal of that trust hurt all the more.

"Abeke struggled to keep her composure, but when she thought of that day at Mulop's grotto, frightening images passed through her mind..." "Then Abeke saw Meilin, and her eyes widened in fear." "Without meaning to, she lifted a hand protectively to her throat." Abeke having a lasting fear of Meilin could have been such a rich concept to explore. Of course, we're made to believe that everything is fine and dandy between the Four after the war is over, but what if it wasn't that simple? Like, Abeke loves her friend and knows none of it was her fault, but she can't help but flinch away when she comes near, remembering those cruel fingers around her throat. It takes some time and therapy for her to feel entirely safe in her presence... and for her to truly let go of those memories of how she treated her before. Abeke and Meilin's relationship had the potential to be so complex after the first arc, but they took it nowhere, and I'll always be disappointed in that.

In the Spirit Animals game, Iskos is much, much larger than he is described in the text. I wish they made him gigantic in the books, too. My headcanon is that Stetriol, as the fantasy version of Australia, has a whole array of giant insects and arachnids. Iskos would be one of these.

"Not much to look at, are they? But then, I knew from the moment I met Abeke that we had nothing to fear from her." Oh, it's gonna be so good when Abeke kills Zerif and the Wyrm in one fell swoop in The Burning Tide: Revised. The fact that Zerif has always underestimated her, only to be brought down by her in the end... for her to prove to him that she is a force to be reckoned with.

Rollan says Concorba was hot, which prompted me to flip back to the map and realize that his city is almost level with Okaihee. This is surprising to me; I always imagined Concorba as being farther north in Amaya and having a continental climate, with mild summers and harsh winters.

It's stated that Rollan has only recently learned to see through Essix's eyes, but he actually first experienced this all the way back in Blood Ties.

Enter one of my favourite characters ever: Irtike! Oh Irtike, I love you so much. The authors realized you were too powerful and shelved you, but I never forgot you.

I can't believe I almost forgot to mention such an important detail, but in my universe, Chinwe is Abeke's aunt, and Irtike is her cousin. Chinwe and Ikenne, Abeke's mother, were sisters. Abeke always had a good relationship with her aunt, and was devastated to learn of her death. However, this means that when Abeke cuts off her father and sister in The Evertree, she still has one family member in Irtike. I've had this headcanon for so many years that I think of it as canon.

I love Rollan's perspective on Soama, and the implication that she only appears more beautiful than Abeke because unlike her, Soama is treated with love and care. It breaks my heart.

Pojalo straight up disowns Abeke. This is actually unforgivable. Him refusing to say that he loves her, declaring that she is dead to him... the fact that they made up after this is absurd. What were they thinking?

A nice little bit of foreshadowing is when Meilin fights the Devourer in a dream and can't see his face because he is covered head to toe in armour -- she can only stare into the "gaping black eyeholes" of his mask. Come to think of it, it would have been cool if Conor had cryptic dreams about the Devourer during his group's time in Nilo. He could have been plagued by them all the way through the book, disturbing visions of the Devourer night after night that he cannot decipher. When they discover Gar dead, Conor thinks this is what the dreams were warning him of. But then they realize the truth.

I always wondered how Shane didn't notice Abeke was injured when he came to get her and Meilin, but it's possible Jhi was able to heal her bruises and scratches that quickly.

"Meilin could sense Abeke's softness... Even if Shane was the kindest of their captors, Abeke needed to be using him, not falling for him." This line always gets me. Abeke's feelings for Shane being on full display, but she herself remaining oblivious to them is something I can't get enough of.

I'm assuming it would be impossible for Cabaro to sire cubs with his lionesses, but all the same, are they his mates? Would a Great Beast even look at a common animal that way? It's an interesting thought.

If Halawir hadn't convinced him to remain neutral, Cabaro might have fought alongside the Four Fallen in their last battle all those years ago. I wonder, was Halawir was going around changing the minds of any others he felt would be sympathetic to their cause?

Cabaro mentions that Briggan was the only one the Great Beasts all trusted. So despite being formed by the same disaster and walking side by side for eons, the Great Beasts still had reservations about their fellows? Interesting...

Cabaro makes a good point about the Greencloaks and their spirit animals, and mankind overall. I wish we could have known what Briggan and Essix were thinking during his speech; for a series called Spirit Animals, we barely ever get inside their heads! Especially when it matters, like now! I want to know how the Four Fallen feel about being spirit animals. Is there any resentment there? Any feelings of being trapped in their new, lesser bodies? Any wishes to return to the greatness and independence they knew for millennia and leave their human partners behind? A conflict revolving around the Four Fallen themselves and the complexity of being tied to humans would be intriguing as hell.

"...Drina, as beautiful as her brother, Shane, was handsome..." To me, this is proof that Abeke is bisexual. She totally has a crush on both of them.

Gerathon is canonically Abeke's biggest fear. Can't fault her for that.

I hold the belief that neither Drina nor Shane knew she was truly going to die that day. The way I see it, the Conqueror leaders originally planned to stage a fake death, in order to give Abeke and Meilin a reason to trust Shane. Both siblings were aware of this... but Drina's death unexpectedly turned out to be real, making her terror and his anguish all genuine. Gerathon and the Conqueror leaders could have decided to kill her because she was putting up too much resistance to Gerathon, and they feared defiance from someone in such a powerful position would cause dissent among the rest of the Conquerors. (In ARHoE, I took this idea and expanded on it a little more. Drina believes she should be leader and queen instead of her brother, and attempts to stage a coup. Her reckless campaign divides the Conquerors -- some are loyal to Shane, some to her. Naturally, Gerathon rewards her treachery with death.) That's just my opinion though, because to my knowledge this whole conspiracy is never fully explained. I love Drina, and wish we got more clarity on what happened here.

I don't think Abeke was meant to hear the whispered exchange between Gerathon and Shane. I think that was her reminding him, in the face of his shock and anger over his sister really being dead, to go ahead with the plan and not flake out now -- lest he meet a similar end.

Meilin wielding a sword in each hand is metal as fuck.

Conor literally stuck an axe in a Great Beast's back. Holy hell. I want to see him telling this story to a group of excited children.

Meilin being unwilling to fight that Conqueror boy because he could be in the same situation as she is was such a good layer to her internal conflict.

Gerathon bites Cabaro on the leg, but her venom doesn't seem to have any effect on him.

I like how they gave Shane's family similar features. Gar and Drina are both described as having large eyes.

"As they approached the spot of scuffed earth and open air that led down to the oasis, a nameless dread overtook Conor." Conor's bond with Briggan giving him not just cryptic visions of the far future, but little premonitions of the near future, is something I would have liked to see.

We don't get to see Cabaro's reaction to his oasis being levelled, which is a shame. Also, wow, even with half the team the Greencloaks bring destruction wherever they go, this time to the animal kingdom.

Why did Gar summon a wolverine, anyway? From what we've seen, people only call up animals that are native to their homeland. In the real world, upon which Erdas is painstakingly based, there are no wolverines anywhere close to Australia. They live in the northern forests of Canada and Eurasia (Amaya, Eura and Zhong on Erdas). So... what's the explanation for this? Are there wolverines in Stetriol, despite the arid climate being nothing like what they are used to? Or did Gar somehow manage to summon a spirit animal from another land?

Sundown has to be my favourite chapter of the book -- possibly even of the entire series. It's the calm before the storm, and a beautiful look into a friendship that will never be the same again. The romantic implications for Shane and Abeke are as clear as day here: The way she keeps noticing how he looks (the sun lighting his face, the lids of his eyes, his arm when she lays her hand atop it), him huskily calling her amazing and her blushing and looking away. I love how it's not fully spelled out, either, and it's up to the reader to deduce that there is love there from the observations she makes, from the words they say, from the way she thinks about him. Their romance is so slow and gentle and bittersweet. This is the last tender moment they'll have. It's sad to look back on it.

My theory is that Shane was letting Grahv out of passive state while they were on the ship, to swim around in the water out of Abeke's sight. This would explain Shane's ease around water, which isn't, to my knowledge, a natural trait of his -- his crocodile is lending him his abilities. Shane is also mentioned to have been diving into the sea without a shirt on, and Abeke would surely have seen the tattoo if Grahv was in passive form during this. Shane could have explained Renneg's absence by saying he was below decks, since the sight of the water made him queasy, and told Abeke not to disturb him because he was resting. This theory is technically invalid because Abeke says Shane hasn't summoned Renneg the whole voyage, but I truthfully don't know how else he could walk around shirtless.

I don't like that Irtike goes right back to Okaihee at the end of the book. What happened to the Irtike who told our protagonists "my heart lives outside of Okaihee now"? She deserved to go with Conor and Rollan to Greenhaven, be present at Tarik's funeral, become a Greencloak in-text and live at Greenhaven thereafter. After all, the Greencloaks probably have more need of her powers than Okaihee at the moment, since the village's failed crops mean it is no longer a target of the Conquerors. At the very least, she should have been one of the returning characters from previous books who travel with the team to Stetriol in The Evertree. (To tell you the truth, I just wanted a whole lot more of Irtike. What do you mean they created a character who is no doubt one of the most powerful people on the planet and then never used her again?)

"Shane turned to face Abeke, his expression unreadable." I just know Shane is gonna have nightmares about Abeke's shocked, disbelieving, betrayed face in this moment for the rest of his life.

"Essix shrieked, and Halawir cocked his head toward her, listening." I love how the Great Beasts seem to be able to understand the Four Fallen, even in their diminished forms. Like they are the only ones who can still hear their voices.

Poor Abeke. She has only just been able to prove that she was not secretly a traitor all along, only just been able to hope for her friends' full trust, and now she has unsuspectingly paved the way for the Conquerors' ultimate victory. She must be fearing that she is farther from acceptance than ever before. My poor, poor girl.

I like Conor's character development into a strong leader and think it was needed, but it happened much too fast. Instead of laying the necessary groundwork for this change early on and building from there, these authors seem to prefer having their characters do a 180 in the span of a single book or even a few chapters. That and the way they handled Irtike are my only major complaints about this book, though.

Did Rise and Fall stand the test of time and remain my favourite? Well, yes! I enjoyed this book from start to finish. There were so many things I loved about it: The introduction of badass one-timers Irtike and Drina, Abeke and Meilin among the Conquerors, all the sweet Shane and Abeke moments, and the fact that we got three new Great Beasts in one book! Most of all, I loved all its ups and downs. I remember being absolutely blown away reading Shane's betrayal when I was ten; that whole plot point was executed very well. Meilin and Jhi surrendering themselves to the Conquerors, Meilin in manacles, Jhi embracing her, made me inconsolable. And of course, Tarik's death was a gut punch. Even with all these losses, though, the book ends on a hopeful note -- the team still has two talismans. They still have a chance against their enemies, however slim. They've hit rock bottom, but they're still looking up. It's a powerful ending, and one that's always stuck with me.

This is part of an ongoing series.

Wild Born | Hunted | Blood Ties | Fire and Ice | Against the Tide | Rise and Fall | The Evertree

Immortal Guardians | Broken Ground | The Return | The Burning Tide

Heart of the Land | The Wildcat's Claw | Stormspeaker | The Dragon's Eye

Tales of the Great Beasts | The Book of Shane | Tales of the Fallen Beasts

[1moreff-creator]

Happy birthday to Min Jeung, the Ultimate Student!

As you may have noticed by my blog name and pfp, I relate to this girl more than what is probably considered healthy. I wanted to show appreciation by talking about her a bit in a half-baked character analysis, and explaining why I find her so amazing!

-Despite being the Ultimate Student, and by her own admission having dedicated her entire life to her talent, she isn't just a souless studying machine. She still makes time to participate in various school clubs and even has a procrastination problem. She is outright offended when Xander insinuates she must have no friends because of her talent. In this, she just like me fr.

-Despite excelling in academics, she has grown to dislike and resent the education system for the seemingly endless amount of information it forces its students to memorize without actually learning anything of value. In this, she just like me fr. Additionally, this fuels her surprisingly interesting dynamic with Xander, one which I may have to cover in another post. Wouldn't want you getting distracted from my post about the birthday girl with thoughts of the pretty British boy.

-Her studious nature has developed into an unrelenting curiosity for the most random shit you can imagine. One of her favorite pastimes is, after all, browsing W*******a articles. Because of this, her knowledge seems to know no rhyme or reason, as she is both perfectly capable of explaining the entire process of baking a cake down to the molecular level, while also not knowing anything about milk beyond how good it tastes. Yes, this is mostly based on that one joke, but in case you can't tell, there's not much info we have to analyse her character with and I'm also sort of projecting really hard. In this, she just like me fr.

-One of these peculiar curiosities are insects and other critters. She decorates cookies with centipedes, collects insects, and her character profile states she likes tarantulas (not an insect, but you know). I chose to believe this means she is a Ghost & Pals fan, and yes that's me projecting again. I, too, am obssessed with funky little animals, so in this, she just like me fr.

-She dislikes children. Based.

-She is kind and patient and maybe a little gay, helping Unnamed Classmate study for a test they are clearly not ready for. Although she can get exasperated by the other's laizzes faire approach to studying, she still puts up with it for her friend. In this, she just like me fr.

-She suffers from pretty bad impostor syndrome, not considering herself on the same level as other Ultimates because of the way she was accepted in. She seems comfortable hanging out with them, but deep down doesn't believe she deserves it. In this, she... isn't like me fr, thankfully. Dodged that trauma.

-Her impostor syndrome is only exacerbated by the fact she doesn't believe she was the highest scoring of the Ultimate Contest for Eminent Students, just the one that best fit the ideal of "Ultimate Student". She sees that as a badge of shame, as she considers herself neither the smartest nor the most knowledgeable from those who took the test. Especially if her secret is the one about poisoning the competition, as many believe. This highlights the needless competitiveness of the school system, where even the students doing well can sometimes feel insufficient or dissapointed if they are not the absolute top of their class, or they don't perform perfectly at every opportunity. ...she just like me fr-

-She feels uncertain of her future, as being the Ultimate Student does not seem to guarantee any kind of future success, nor does it help her narrow down what she wants to do in the future. This is a great representation of a common fear and worry of top students, who worry having so much of their life be defined by their excellence in academics will mean they won't know what to do with themselves once they stop studying. Well, I say it's common, but maybe it's just Min and I, because in this she just like me fr. I assure you, I am fine.

-She didn't mean to kill Xander. How tragic, for someone whose entire life was defined by the pressure to never make a mistake, to never fail and especially not fail that Contest for Eminent Students, who was promised a bright future if she only gave up her present and her past to a souless system that does not truly care about her; to have that future ripped out from her, just because of one mistake. She only wanted to save Teruko...

-Fukc Danganronap asdkanej I wil why did this happen why she was so great and smart and I loved her and fuak's sake why why why. She's the first killer death that hurt me the most, by far, and her hug with Teruko actually fucking destroyed me aaaaahhhh-

-I love DRDT so much, and thank it for being able to live up to its name and giving me the despair I crave. Although Min's death made me sad, it made me sad in the good way, and I thoroughly enjoyed her character as long as she lasted. She may be the best written first chapter death I've ever seen! :D

Now please let Veronika live past chapter 3-

Anyways, thanks for reading, and happy birthday to Min Jeung! I will go cry now.

Bonus: Here's just a few songs that remind me of her. You may not be able to tell, but I like Vocaloid.

+Abnormality Dancin' Girl by Guchiry

+Lost One's Weeping by Neru

+Aishite by Kikuo

+Entomologists by Ghost & Pals

+Star of the Show by Ghost & Pals

+Pathological Facade by Ghost & Pals

+Appetite of a People-Pleaser by, guess who, Ghost & Pals

+Marionette by KIRA

+Meltdown by iroha(sasaki)

And of course,

+Happy Birthday!

[jestersdlc]

PLEASE tell me more about your little insect guys (gn) i love them dearly 🙏🙏🙏 /nf

this is about that thing. about the asks about the ocs. by the way :3

-🐜 (person you definitely do not know /silly)

I can tell you more about their project AND them all as a whole! :D

Congratulations, you have triggered an unskippable cutscene dearest friend :3 /silly

Because it will no doubt be a long ramble it will be under the cut along with some lil doods of the few drawings I have of the beans in question (I need to redo them and make proper designs for.....most of them still but theres some! And a spider one, so....) Cw insect and spider character along with WALL of text.

My lil insect beans are for a lil project I call 'Butterflies and Monarchs'

Which is....as you can assume about butterflies (and other insects) and BOTH meanings of the word monarchs as in European royal hierarchy and monarch butterflies :3

I have a lil summary for it here (A benefit of an old film class even if I plan to either write it like a novel or make it a graphic novel once I dont suffer doing backgrounds....as much)

A duchess to be, discontented with her duty to marry her betrothed. Getting off on the wrong foot with her betrothed she meets a mystery man at a masquerade ball and slowly becomes closer to both trying to unravel who they really are and her feelings to decide if she’ll follow her heart or her responsibilities before it's too late.

The project leans into history for 1700's europe (specifically france but with ties to england and italy as well for history and aesthetics) along with heavy flower motifs, formal prose and COLOR is a big thing! :D (.....boy doesn't this sound familiar Ahem....Pink ....niche special interests, themes and motifs will be used again and again)

But the main character is a hybrid moth/butterfly Marquise Montella Noelle Dubois from the Marigold kingdom

(These are....very old drawings but you get an idea from them....) Montella is based on a Monarch butterfly and a white satin moth, her wings are very muted during the day but glow in the pattern of a monarchs at night or in dim/dark settings ^-^

Her kingdom is themed after marigolds, old england(mixed with france), and orange, gold and white colors. She also has a few additional monikers she goes by (tho its very blatanly stated its still her....unlike with others under pseudonyms :3)

....while she's the main character I don't have much to say about her (the side characters take the show at times, she just TECHNICALLY moves the plot along with her sappy attempts at romance and diplomatics with her betrothed) but she's meant to be very sweet (if oblivious....) character ^-^

And while I sadly don't have drawings for them I want to mention Montella's parents (who are barely seen but....I love the Earl he's a joy)

Duchess Genevieve Madeleine Dubois, a satin moth and main ruler of the Marigold kingdom (YES its equally ruled by both her and her husband, but she has the higher status and thus is mentioned first) She's a very posh lady, formal and polite, not the most outwardly affectionate (unlike her husband) (I imagine she's very fluffy and keeps her fluff kept silky smooth and neat at all times)

and Earl Montgomery Emmet Dubois a very exuberant (and frankly obnoxious) monarch butterfly, he's loud and jovial and very different from his wife XD (He's wonderful even if he's not seen much, I actually have a chunk of a draft for the first....chapterish of the script for the project if you'd want to see that, it's rough and from like....2 years ago but you get a better feel for the Montella, her parents, Anton and his courtship partner Whilemena :3)

Moving on! We of course have (possibly your favorite) Anton Alfred McKnight the golden ant and personal guard to Montella (who often escapes him much to his nerves dismay) who is sent off to the Cornflower kingdom with her!

And his courtship partner Wilhemena Hayden Elffire who is a sweet little firefly gal, she's a tad forgetful but makes up for it in spirit! She's Montella's personal maid/handmaiden in the Marigold kingdom (she unfortunately was NOT sent with as the Cornflower kingdom has someone to assist Montella while she stayed there) but her and Anton are a sweet lil background couple (She's strong enough to bowl over Anton it's hilarious to see.)

Moving on to the Cornflower kingdom! With main themes being old england/italy, Cornflowers, and the colors black, blue and silver!

We have Montella's betrothed! Marqui Dominic Azure D'Angeli He is a hybrid of a Black rustic moth and a Blue morpho butterfly. He has plain black wings like his father.

Duke Valentine Cosimo D’Angeli. Dominics father, a black rustic moth. A very diplomatic and courteous moth.

Lady Verity Bernadette D’Angeli. A blue morpho butterfly, she is very passive, she's sweet but a touch meek (she was once but a commoner)

Count Atticus Victor Dior. A blue morpho butterfly, and Dominic's elder half brother from Lady Verity's past marriage. (He is also a very big jerk, high and mighty yet never to be next in line because HE IS A JERK (that's literally the only reason, he wasn't chosen because he's a jerk XD)) He's very antagonistic to Montella

Lady Jezebel Ernestine Bellarosa, a frequent companion to Atticus. She's a blue wasp and from a seperate kingdom originally but moved here in her youth (I FORGET ITS NAME BUT ITS PURPLE THEMED) she's initially rather antagonistic as well (Atticus is a TERRIBLE influence...) but she warms up to Montella's kindness (and may not be as straight as she thought she was-)

MOVING ON! We have the mysterious mystery mothman (or he LOOKS like a moth....who's to say :3) that is Sir Azure with his glowing blue wings and ever present mask, a quick companion to Montella, of course SOME people know who he is, but he's a mystery to Montella and supposed to be to the reader (I do love me some mystery after all :3)

Pierre Armand Du’Bleu the head royal guard! And the beloved blue mantis man, cool and collected and unnervingly never seems to blink, only stare passively, constantly. And the one to constantly get on Ant's nerves <3

(I like this better then the ref dood of him so this one it is! :3)

Mrs. Lavinia Estelle Bazil, personaly maid/handmaiden of Montella while she stays in the cornflower kingdom. A blue bumblebee! She's quite the hardworker and always to the point (She also has a partner, but they are only ever mentioned to be a green scarab and a carpenter :3)

AND last but not leastttttttt Horatio André Clément (beloved bean....) personal butler/handservant to Dominic, he's a lil blue peacock spider and is intersex! (debating giving him he/they pronouns since he originally was just he/him...or they/he TBD!!)

I love Horatio, he's a lil silent sweetheart, very shy and very quiet.

Anddddd that's all summarizing everyone and the actual story summary without going toooooo indepth

Unskippable cutscene complete! /silly

[kumoriyami-xiuzhen]

Hakuoki Tsukikage Kazama Short Story

This is the last translation to make up for March (only four not five since i don't count a week because of my bday)... I'm probably just going to translate the rest of what I can for April...

Also I hate tax law. Taxes themselves are something I'm okay with to a degree since I'm probably more federalist and like health care and the idea of dental care, but looking through who knows how many statues and laws from the CRA for just one thing is something I wish I didn't subject myself to lol.

ANYWAY.

The story for this translation was originally published in B's-LOG 2019年11月号.

the last of these I'll be able to translate are the Souji one with the books, the Saito story with the flower in winter, the Harada story and the one for Souma.... i think those haven't been translated?

Hakuoki Tsukikage B’s Log 2019年11月 Kazama Short Story “Nagatsuki (長月)” [meaning the 9th month of the lunar calendar]

Translation by KumoriYami

"This was all that could be prepared."

"No, it's nothing. I should be the one apologising for forcing you to do this."

With a plate in my hand that I received from the hostess who bowed her head to apologise, I greeted her before going back to the room.

On our journey to Aizu, this was the only inn we could find.

The closer to the battlefield, the fewer people there were, and the once lively stores and inns tightly shut their doors.

This was something that had been realized after camping out several times, [though] Amagiri-san found that there was inn operating at the end of the road/street [not sure about the first half here].

(It was thanks to Amagiri-san...)

Chizuru sighed as she thought this.

"...Too slow."

Back in the room, Kazama-san had already put on his yukata and was relaxing as he looked out the window.

Ever since we left Edo, Kazmaa-san had been wearing simple western-style sleeves.

Although that really suited him, I still thought he was more attractive while wearing a kimono.

"Out of kindness, the hostess provided me with a choushi. What do you think about this?"

According to ChatGPT (since I could not find a response I liked through google): "In Japanese, 铫子 (choushi) is called "yakan" (ヤカン) which refers to a kettle or a pot used for boiling water or heating liquids, often made of metal or ceramic. It is commonly used for making tea or coffee, but can also be used for warming sake or other alcoholic beverages." T/N: the raw itself uses "铫子"

"Hmph… this sake is not to my taste, but if you want to pour it, I'll drink it."

In response to his arrogant statements, I smiled wryly and poured some sake for him.

I wasn't used to his behaviour before, but now I've completely accepted it.

(He is actually a very emotional person…)

I already know that now.

As I listened to the sound of insects in the distance, I poured sake into his cup.

In this private room [In private?], he was unexpectedly quiet, and was fond of silence, so I didn't have to force myself to greet him.

His posture as he looked up at the moon was so graceful, like the appearance of someone in a painting—

(What am I thinking...)

For some reason, I was now very concerned about Kazama-san's inner thoughts/opinions.

"It's almost the fifteenth night [Alternatively, this can be interpreted as "the night of the full moon" like in the Juugoyabana drama].

"This sake is no good, but I can it's not bad as a side dish to appreciating the moon."

In contrast to his sarcasm, his eyes were gentle.

"When you're satisfied and aren't asking for more, it's easy to get what you want. In this world, there are too many foolish fossils [term is for people out of date or have fallen behind] who have forgotten this."

His words penetrated deeply into my heart.

With my own eyes, I have witnessed what people who pursue profit and those who have robbed others to satisfy their own desires. I saw firsthand what that looked like to the state of my hometown.

If Kazama-san wasn't at my side, perhaps I wouldn't be able to endure it.

"...So, are you satisfied now?"

"What a foolish question."

The corners of his mouth curled into a smile at the me who was feeling shy.

"If you want me to feel satisfied, let me satisfy myself first… it is useless to have another's person way of thinking/thoughts fulfilled by someone else."

(...He truly is a gentle person.)

The words I heard were a comfort to me who was worrying about those still fighting, and those yet to fight.

As he looked up towards the moon again, and I silently thanked him.

---end---

[total-drama-takes-takes-2]

tti episode 10

“Last time on Total Takes Island: things got heated in the kitchen- literally- and the Anons ended up exploding a ten-thousand dollar state-of-the-art mobile cookery, resulting in their epic failure and elimination of the ever-paranoid Frollo. The Fujoshis stole the challenge, mostly thanks to Courtney’s willingness to step up, and a little because of McLovin’s surprising hispanic heritage. Will the Fujoshis keep their lead? Will the Anons ever start getting along? Find out now, on Total! Takes! Island!”

The communal bathrooms are empty at this point in the morning, as almost no one’s awake so early. The sun has just barely risen over the lake, and it’s still a nice periwinkle blue out. Only one camper is fully awake and in gear. 

Julia’s head peers around the side of the outhouse confessional, checking to see if anyone else is there. When she’s sure the coast is clear, she sneaks in, closing the door behind her, and begins fidgeting with the camera. 

---

Julia shakes it around for a moment, grunting in annoyance before sighing and sitting back, crossing her arms. 

JULIA: “I didn’t want for it to have to come to this. I really didn’t… Mostly. But he’s left me with no choice! That little insect is going down,”

Julia reaches forward again and the camera fizzles out. 

---

The memory card pops out and she inspects it for a moment, memorizing the make and model before setting it back in place and hurrying outside. 

Most of the tech- the computers, the mics and cameras, the maintenance supplies- are housed in a small green tent some ways beyond the mess hall. Julia’s seen it before on various challenges, always keeping it in the back of her mind, but this is her first reason to make use of it. 

At this point in the morning, not even the camera crew are up yet, leaving the tent empty and ripe for the picking. Julia sorts through a few plastic bins on a wire shelf before finding one full of the correct kind of memory cards, pulling it out and setting it down by one of the computers, which she takes a seat at after. 

She picks the first chip up. “Let’s get to work,”

---

JULIA: “I’m no genius, but I’ve picked a few things up here and there. Computers are a lot like people- say the right things, and you can bend their reality to your will!”

---

“Rise and shine, campers!” Chris’ voice blasts through the intercom, all too loud for 7 AM. “If you’re not up already, now’s your time to head down to the mess hall and stock up on energy for today’s challenge- it’s a real killer!”

He laughs before the intercom crackles out. Courtney smiles, slipping out of bed to stretch and dress themselves just as Ass walks in. Bonnie looks at the two from their bed, and then turns over in it. 

“Good morning, Courtney,” Ass says plainly. 

Courtney nods. “Good morning,”

---

BONNIE: “Ever since the cooking challenge, those two numbskulls have made some secret agreement to pretend to be nice to each other so we don't lose again. It’s honestly kind of sickening to watch.”

---

McLovin knocks on the door, then peeks his head in when no response comes. “Um… Bonnie, Caesar wants to meet you in the mess hall in ten,”

Bonnie sighs, yet still smiling, and slides out of bed to collect their clothes and toothbrush. Ass gives a small wave before turning back to Courtney. “Rough morning?”

“What do you mean?”

“You just look a little tired. Better bring your Type-A-Game today, ha,” 

And with that, they flip their hair over their shoulder and walk outside, following Bonnie and McLovin and leaving Courtney alone. 

The mess hall is crowded this morning, as everyone is either actually eating or just waiting for the challenge to start. Julia walks in, the last of her team to show, and smiles brightly while sitting beside Michael.

“Where’ve you been?” Scruffy asks. “Chris is gonna show up any minute now, if my memory serves correct... which it often does.”

“Just taking a walk. Stretching, you know?” she smiles. 

“Long walk,” Michael mutters, managing to swallow a bite of Chef’s green casserole without complaint. “You were gone all morning.”

“Just appreciating life, Mikey. Taking it all in,”

“I already asked you to not call me that,”

Scruffy watches the interaction with a perplexed, somewhat uncomfortable expression, and then moves their tray over to Max’s side of the table. “Those chicks, man. Weird,”

“Uh-huh,” Max says, refusing to look up from the book he’s reading to address Scruffy. “But most of you people are.”

They laugh. “We’re all a little crazy for coming on this show in the first place, huh? All the contestants are, it’s why we were picked.”

“I’m not crazy,”

“You’re… something, man,” 

Scary suddenly slides over on Scruffy’s other side, smiling widely. “I like crazy,” 

Scruffy swallows a lump in their throat as Max looks up from his book to them, and then across the table. Michael catches his gaze and waves slightly- to which he returns the gesture, earning them both a glare from Julia. 

Across the mess hall, most of the Fujoshi table is silently watching McLovin as he tries to do his best Borat impression to lighten the mood. Bonnie and Caesar are talking amongst themselves, completely cut off from the rest of the team as they chat idly.

Ass turns their head and watches the two for a few moments. "You wanna share that with the rest of the class, kids?"

Caesar raises an eyebrow. "Ever heard of a private conversation?"

---

ASS: "Caesar and Courtney both have sticks up their butts, but different models, you know? Courtney is all "let's try to win today guys" and Caesar's all "fighting over a boy? what are you, twelve?" and both of them are annoying as crap. But at least Courtney will look at me when I talk to them."

---

“Alright, camperssss!” Chris says, walking into the mess hall with his arms outstretched. “Chef and I have been looking over the raw footage recently, and we’ve come to a consensus about what to do with all the hate and negativity going around you angsty teens.”

Scruffy and Staci look at Michael. Kelly looks at Julia, who looks at Max, who looks at Austin and Scary. Courtney and Ass try to avoid making eye contact, choosing to stare at Caesar instead. He raises a perplexed eyebrow. 

“So we’re going to work through some of those difficult issues today with an intense trust building challenge!” Chris smiles. “Chef has already gone through and chosen your partners for you- and don’t worry, viewers at home- he left plenty of commentary on why.”

The campers make nervous eye contact with each other. 

“Alright, let’s get to pairing up, shall we? Our first Anon duo is…” Chris reads from the cue cards he’s been handed. “Julia and Max!”

---

CHEF: “I like the little guy. The girl, not so much. But they hate each other more than I’ve seen any two competitors hate in a long, long time. I respect that,”

---

“For the Fujos, Bonnie and McLovin!”

---

CHEF: “Now, I’m sure what all the viewers wanna see is Coutney and that other one having it out- that’s what Chris said. I respectfully disagree, this is not the time, nor thee place. Plus, the goth doesn’t do so well when separated from the pastel guy,”

---

“Michael and Staci!”

---

CHEF: “Beetlejuice is a pretty smart, down-to-earth girl, even if she is oblivious. Pinkie Pie is like a walking headache. Not a good mix.”

---

“Caesar and McLovin!”

---

CHEF: “The pastel guy doesn’t seem to like anyone but gothy. The string bean is sunshine and rainbows and everyone else loves him. Not only that, but they both seem a little over their heads. Perfect.”

---

“Austin and Kelly!”

---

CHEF: “They’re sweet, like a nice, well-made citrus cheesecake. I wouldn’t wanna eat it every day, but I’d rather have lemon and orange cream than the burnt ass pie crust the other couples are serving.”

---

“Caesar and Ass!”

---

CHEF: “Again, that lavender dude… I don’t know, I just can’t see him getting along with anyone but that goth chick,”

---

“Scary and Scruffy,”

---

CHEF: “They amuse me,”

---

“And Courtney and Bonnie!”

---

CHEF: “I thought Courtney might need a break after all that drama, so I only gave them one challenge, and I made sure it was with someone they could trust. What? I can have favorites!”

---

The selected duos all equally grimace at each other, aside from Kelly and Austin- and Scary, who gives Scruffy a wide, enthusiastically creepy grin. They shiver. 

“Now, if you’ll all please follow me out to the mountains, we can start our first challenge!”

---

“After some talking, Chef and I decided to go easy on you for your first challenge- it’s a simple, free-hand rock climbing trip up this massive cliff face!” Chris gestures up the 200 foot high wall, where an eagle cries before smacking into the rocky surface. The contestants stare. 

“Um, excuse me, but which part of that is supposed to be easy?” Staci asks. 

Chef comes out, dragging two padded mats, barely big enough to fit two people on. 

“We got you some cushioned landing!”

Max looks pale. 

“Here’s your belay and harness. One camper will pull the slack through the belay as the other climbs- if they fall, the belay will stop them from breaking all the bones in their bodies. Now, there are a few minor… setbacks, if you will, to even the playing field,”

“How does that make it even?” Bonnie asks. Chris shrugs. “I dunno, but it makes it more fun to watch!”

“The person on belay must also harness their partner up. It’s all about trusting each other, dudes. I’m sure you know the drill,”

Julia raises an eyebrow at Max. “I am not going up there,”

“As if I’d let you hold me up!”

“Guys, guys,” Scruffy says, stepping between the two as they shout. “Let’s chill, okay? Max, I’ll supervise Julia on the ground. No funny business, alright?”

Julia raises an eyebrow. Max rolls his eyes, but spreads his arms and legs for her to tighten the harness. 

Meanwhile, Bonnie hooks up McLovin no problem, earning jealous looks from everyone else on the team. 

---

CAESAR: “So unfair. I know Chef separated me and Bonnie on purpose. Otherwise-”

---

ASS: “We’d sweep the challenge, no problem. McLovin and I-”

---

COURTNEY: “Have been best friends since the very beginning. Of course, just when I have something good of my own, an actual friend, everyone else has to come in and ruin it!"

---

Max scales the cliffside with surprising ease, his small, compact body moving up the rocky face efficiently. Scary continues popping in and out around Scruffy, forcing their attention away every few minutes just for Julia to tug on the rope and force Max to glare back. She snickers as McLovin’s weak arms struggle to carry him up. 

“C’mon, you can do this, MC!” Courtney shouts. “Put those spider-like limbs to good use!”

“Just don’t give yourself a hernia!” Ass yells after. Courtney glares before quickly remembering their “friendship” and turns to a forced smile. 

McLovin shakily reaches for another jagged rock and hears a faint click. “Uh oh,”

Chef pours a vat of boiling hot water down from the top of the cliff. 

Courtney cups their mouth to yell louder. “McLovin, your right!”

McLovin swerves, narrowly missing a lifetime of third-degree burn scars. Max is just barely ahead, though as he reaches up for another ledge, a tiny mechanical door in the cliff face opens and an army of bats fly out. He ducks, hanging from the rope while he covers his ears. 

Chris stands next to Julia. “I’ll give you fifty bucks if you drop him,”

She pauses to think for a moment. “...Really?”

“Julia!” Michael yells. 

She rolls her eyes. “Relax, Mikey, I was only kidding,”

Max clings to the cliff face once more. “I heard that!”

McLovin ambles ahead, using Courtney’s advice to scale the rocky mountainside as if he were a spider. Max watches him, and then grunts, moving upwards. 

“Faster!” Julia yells. 

“Why don’t you come up and try it yourself!” he shouts back. “You scheming, manipulative, lazy fake-blonde!”

Julia gasps. “MY BLONDE IS REAL!”

“You wish!”

Julia nonchalantly lets go of the rope, leaping back and crashing into Michael behind her. Austin bounds forward, grabbing the end of the rope in a bout of heroic generosity. Alas, he’s too weak, and goes flying, too, until Scruffy grabs his ankles and helps lower Max down. 

McLovin reaches the top of the cliff. “The Fujoshis have won the round!” Chris yells. 

Max glares at Julia, brushing the dirt off his blazer while storming away. She huffs and storms in the opposite direction. 

Scruffy drops the rope and turns to offer a hand to help Michael up, who hesitantly accepts it. 

“Thanks for that. Not letting him die, I mean,” she says, now on her feet. 

“He’s a good kid. A little clueless, but he’s got the spirit. And between you and me…” Scruffy looks around, making sure Julia isn’t within ear shot. “I’d watch out for the company you keep.”

---

“This next one is a real favorite of mine: An ultimate cooking challenge!” Chris grins, gesturing to the few competitors in the room. Michael stands beside Staci, both looking malevolently at each other. Caesar and McLovin stand on the other side of the mess hall, just looking plain confused. 

“Today, you’ll be preparing an old classic- fugu sashimi, a delicious little Japanese dish consisting of extremely poisonous blowfish!” Chris grins as Chef brings a tank into the room, setting it down on the podium Chris is speaking at. “These fish must be sliced very carefully to cut out the poisonous organs, and avoid sending your partner into catatonic shock. Any volunteers for head chef?”

---

MICHAEL: “I’ve eaten… a lot of weird things, admittedly, but sushi- poisonous or not- is not one of them. I just… can’t do fish. Can’t even touch them.”

---

“Are you sure you know what you’re doing?” Michael asks as Staci jabs at the blowfish with a skewer. 

“Oh, yeah. My great-great-great-great grandma was a master sashimi chef in Tokyo,” they reply, brandishing the knife. “I’ll make it taste like chicken!”

“If you say so…”

McLovin watches Caesar expertly chop up the blowfish, smiling confidently while he uses the knife like a pro. "I'm glad it's just you and me, huh, bud? Those girls drive me crazy sometimes,"

"Isn't Bonnie a girl?"

Caesar blinks. "Bonnie is a goth,"

McLovin seems perplexed, but doesn't question him any further.

The end results are… varied, to say the least. Caesar’s dish definitely resembles a sushi roll, Staci’s more of a pink, wet salad. Michael stares at her plate, and then back to Chris. “If I die… actually, screw it. I hope I do,”

She takes a bite, chewing nervously, then swallowing with no problems. Chris blinks. “Wow. We may have a tie. McLovin?”

McLovin grins, popping one of the sushi rolls in his mouth and chewing confidently. An odd look suddenly crosses his face and he stares at his hands, face frozen, before dropping to the floor. 

“Hm. All looks,” Chris chuckles. “Anons, you’re safe. Chef, you’re free to set up a cot in the medical tent for the lamp post. He’ll be fine in a few days… probably.”

Michael sighs, relieved, holding a hand up to her forehead. “Jeez. Thanks, Staci, you really did make it taste like chicken,”

Staci shrugs with a smile. “Well, duh, I just used all the guts and stuff. It’s all the same in most animals, anyway,”

A panicked look crosses Michael’s face (now green) and she runs outside to throw up. 

“Better make that two cots in the tent,”

---

“Now, this next round involves not one, not two, but three challenges! It’s the blind triathlon!” Chris grins, holding up three fingers. “It begins with the blind William Tell, then the blind trapeze, followed by the wonderful blind toboggan- if you all live long enough!”

Austin stands still as Chris sets an arrow on his head, and then safety glasses over his eyes. Caesar receives a similar treatment, along with a few angry glares from Courtney and Ass. Bonnie gives him a half-enthusiastic thumbs up. 

"Be careful," Caesar says. "My face is a high-value asset! So none of that posh 'I don't care attitude', thank you."

Ass rolls their eyes. "You know, I'd consider our paralyzed team member a more valuable asset, but you do you,"

"Yeah. What they said," Courtney speaks plainly, crossing their arms.

"Don't get sassy with me. That's my job,"

Chris interrupts their bickering with a lovely grin. “Much like the legendary William Tell, you’ll be knocking arrows off your partner’s heads with these apples here, while blindfolded!” Chris says, pointing at Ass and Kelly, and then to a wooden tub of red apples by his feet. “Now, as much as I’d like to be shooting apples off your heads, I thought I’d make it easy.”

“Whoever knocks off that arrow while causing the least amount of facial damage wins! Anyone taking off their blindfold will result in an immediate disqualification. Ready?”

---

KELLY: “I’m not worried. I’ve had lots of practice aiming with the paintballs, and Austin is so good at staying still and being quiet while I do my daily activities! He quite enjoys following me around, he’s like a cute little lapdog.”

---

Ass fires first, with no intention to actually hit the arrow, and continues to unleash an array of apples on Caesar while he yelps. 

“Aim for the arrow! The arrow! You just hit my shin!”

Ass smiles. “Whoopsies,” and fires into his groin. He wheezes, and then collapses on the ground. 

Kelly’s first two shots whiz straight past Austin’s head while he smiles. The next three hit him in the chest, and he doesn’t even blink. 

“He’s like a statue,” Scruffy notes, writing down the commotion. Scary creeps up behind them before putting a hand on their shoulder, causing them to jump and run, screaming. 

The commotion startles Kelly and they fire a shot before taking the time to aim, but it miraculously hits the top of Austin’s head. The arrow rolls off and he just keeps on smiling. 

“The Anons got this one!” Chris turns to Ass, who’s still pelting Caesar with apples as he lays defeated on the ground. “You know, I'm enjoying this as much as the next guy, but you can stop now. Ass? Ass?” Courtney watches apathetically, arms crossed. Chris turns to Bonnie. “Are you gonna do anything about that?”

“Okay, that’s enough,” Bonnie says, shoving Ass backwards. They stumble and fall on their butt, finally lifting their blindfold as Courtney offers a hand to help them up. 

---

“Alright, your next challenge is simple- two players will stand on this trapeze platform and wait until your partners tell you to jump and catch you. And you’d better hope they get it right- this pond beneath the set is full of jellyfish!”

Scary swings back and forth, upside down on the trapeze swing. Scruffy clutches the edges, trembling. “And you’re sure you’ll catch me?”

“Positive!” they beam. 

Scruffy still shakes their head. “Positive?!”

“I swear on my grave!”

Scruffy takes a deep breath and shakily walks to the edge of the platform. Scary swings forward, holding out her hands. “Jump!”

They don’t move, still shaking. “Promise you’ll catch?”

---

SCRUFFY: “I’m not usually this nervous when it comes to TD challenges, it’s just… Scary is a wild card, man. She’s like Izzy and Crimson combined! Just that thought alone is terrifying!”

---

“Ugh, this is taking forever!” Chris sighs. “Fujos, go first. And you two-” he points at Scruffy and Scary. “Get it together!”

Bonnie catches Courtney flawlessly, despite the blindfolds, and swings them back and forth mid-air. 

“Okay, just drop me on land, alright?” Courtney asks. 

“I’m- trying! God, your hands are sweaty!” 

Courtney slips out of Bonnie’s grip seconds later, falling into the pond of jellyfish. Ass smirks slightly. 

---

“Okay, you can do this, Scruffy,” Scruffy murmurs to themselves, knees shaking. “It’s for the team.”

“Get on with it!” Chris shouts into his megaphone. 

“You got this, Scruffy!” Michael yells from shore, still looking a little green. “I believe in you!”

Scruffy swallows a lump in their throat and approaches the edge of the platform, shaking. They take a deep breath, and then hold out their arms, bending their knees. 

Scary swings forward. “Now!”

Scruffy jumps, screaming just before Scary grabs their wrists. 

“Hah! Haha!” they laugh triumphantly. “I’m alive! I’m alive!”

Scary tosses them with ease, and they roll onto the shore. The Anons cheer. 

---

“Not looking good for the Fujos, huh?” Chris chuckles, all the campers (nix McLovin) lined up. “So I thought we’d make a little deal. Whoever wins this round gets an automatic extra two points, making you both even-Steven. How does that sound?”

“What’s the tiebreaker?” Courtney asks. 

“In due time, dear camper. But let’s talk about this- this is our blind toboggan race! Each team will have a driver and a navigator. The driver- blindfolded, of course- will steer, while the navigator makes sure you don’t crash. Now, if I’m being honest, I thought you’d all be gravely injured by now, so I guess I’m gonna have to make up these pairings on the spot, huh?” Chris pauses, tapping his chin. “Ass and Courtney… and Julia and Michael!”

Julia smirks, nodding, and both Ass and Courtney force a smile. 

The top of the mountain has been cleared all the way to the bottom, a straight path cut down the middle for the sleds. Michael looks down nervously, then to Julia. “Are you sure you wanna-”

“I’m sure,” she says as Chris comes around and blindfolds Michael and Ass. 

“Okay, if we wanna win this, we have to work together,” Courtney says. “You-you have to trust me!”

“As if- wait... I have a compromise for you,” Ass starts, their voice mellowing out as an idea comes to them. “You vote with me if we lose tonight, and I’ll listen to your probably-wrong instructions.”

“Alright, fine, but it better be someone good,”

Ass leans back and whispers in Courtney’s ear, who thinks for a moment and then nods. “I actually… don’t have a problem with that,”

Chris steps between the two toboggans at the start line, holding a little checkered flag. “Now, before I send you off, I’m legally required to tell you that I left a few surprises on the way down,”

“What?” Michael asks, looking around blindly. “What surprises?”

“I can’t tell you. Don’t you know what the word surprise means?” he sighs. “Chef?”

Chef kicks off both the toboggans, starting the race. 

“Right- left! No, my left!” Julia screams. 

“We’re sitting the same way!”

“Right! Right! Left! Left! Right again!” Courtney shouts, pointing ahead like a war hero in a painting. “Move just a little more this way- yes!”

The Fujoshi’s toboggan sails over a ramp-like rock formation and goes flying ahead of the Anons. Julia yells. “Crap! Ok, time to try an alternate route,”

“WHAT?!”

Julia throws her weight to the left side of the toboggan, sending the entire party into a trail off in the woods. Michael screams as they crash and bump down a rocky path, shredding the bottom of the wooden sled. 

Courtney looks behind them, and sees nothing. “We lost them! Keep going!” they shout. Ass grins and leans forward, increasing their speed. 

Suddenly, a loud boom catches both of their attentions and Courtney turns to see a land mine having gone off behind them. “Seriously!”

A bear steps out of the woods, growling and swiping a long-clawed paw at the two. Courtney pushes Ass’ head down with their own to duck, distracting both of them long enough not to notice the large patch of quicksand coming up. 

Meanwhile, Julia swerves the toboggan again, sending the two off a rocky slope and back onto the main course with a rough bump. They slide down the end of the hill, crossing the finish line as Courtney and Ass come stumbling in seconds later, covered in mud. 

“The Anons have won the challenge, and today’s game!” The team cheers, with the exception of Max. 

“The Anons have won the challenge, and today’s game!” The team cheers, with the exception of Max. “Fujoshis- I’ll see you at the campfire ceremony tonight.”

Just about everyone walks off but Michael, lagging behind. She eventually stops walking, looking at the ground for a few moments before Julia comes back around. 

“What’s the holdup, bestie?”

“I don’t know, I’m just… still upset about the Max thing, I guess,”

Julia walks over, linking her arm with Michael’s and dragging her along. “I honestly can’t say I’m surprised he’s finally ignoring you. He only really wanted you as an ally, after all,”

Michael raises an eyebrow. “What does that mean?”

“Oh… I assumed you knew. He was just playing you for the wins, but once it was clear you were my friend and I was going to protect you from being taken advantage of, he backed off,” Julia holds back a smile. “What, you thought he liked you or something?”

“No,” Michael shakes her head. “No, I guess not.”

---

The evening fills with the sounds of crickets and buzzing mosquitoes as the sun disappears. Max sits outside the back of the cabins, leaning against the cinderblock pillars holding it up and staring off into the distance with an angry glare on his face. 

Julia rounds the corner, merrily walking by with a towel over her shoulder as if she were casually walking to the communal bathrooms for a shower rather than having come out there completely intentionally. 

Max looks up and glares. “What are you playing at?”

“Hm?” she asks casually, turning her head a bit back at him. 

“I saw you during the toboggan race. What’s your game? What’re you using her for?”

“You are so betting on the wrong girl,” 

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Julia smiles, pulling a phone from her pocket. 

Max raises an eyebrow. “Where’d you-” 

“From Chris. I have slippery fingers, you know,” Julia holds up a hand before standing over him, making sure he can't see the audio file on screen as she turns up the volume. “And you might want to listen carefully for once.”

She holds the device up high, and lets a menagerie of cut-up words from the confessional footage play. 

“Max, he’s a- good player. But I- don’t like- him. He’s- not- my friend. I’m trying to- get ahead- win- that’s all he’s- good for,” Michael’s slightly choppy voice reads off. 

---

JULIA: “I just went through hours of footage, took out the best bits, cut them, sewed them together, and then added a filter to make it sound natural. What, like it’s hard?”

---

Max stands, flips Julia off, and storms back into the cabins. She chuckles, tossing the dummy phone away and continuing her walk to the showers. 

---

“Fujoshis- you guys just can’t catch a break, huh?” Chris grins. “Nonetheless, our merge is only a few episodes away, and, unfortunately, few of you will stay to see it. The ones who will…

McLovin!”

Chris tosses a marshmallow at McLovin’s head. Still paralyzed, it hits his forehead and bounces onto the ground. 

“Courtney and Bonnie!”

“Caesar- Ass- neither of you were exemplary today, but only one of you will be going home,”

Ass turns to Courtney with a smile. Courtney leans over and uses McLovin’s hand to salute them. Caesar doesn’t seem too bothered, though Bonnie is beginning to look nervous. 

“And the winner- the survivor, if you will- the team champion- the sole victor-

Is…

Ass.

Caesar- sorry, bud, your contract has been terminated,” Chris grins, pulling a thick paper packet from his back pocket and tearing it in half. 

Caesar’s face drops. 

“Who- you can’t- but-” he stammers as Chef walks over with a wheelbarrow, scooping him inside. “Who- what did I do?!”

“Caesar!” Bonnie chases after the two as Chef dumps him in the boat of losers. “No- you can’t go!”

He stands, ignoring all the dirt and grime on his blazer to take Bonnie’s hands into his own. “Listen to me, Bonbon. You have to stay strong. You have to keep going,”

At the boat wheel, Chef rolls his eyes and starts the engine, driving off before Caesar can finish his monologue. “I’ll always be with you in spirit!”

“NOOOOOOOO!” Bonnie yells back as the boat disappears off into the distance. 

Chris steps into frame, blocking Bonnie from the cameras with his award-winning smile. “Wow. Not a good day for the fandom. Who will go home tomorrow? And who will stay to play another day? Find out next time, on Total! Takes! Island!”

[youritalianbookpal]

Ten Questions Book Review - The Beautiful Ones by Silvia Moreno-Garcia

What is it? A girl with a talent, a woman with a secret, and a man with too much love for his own good meet in what I can only assume is fake England during the Belle Epoque.

Who should read it and why? If you feel like the odd one out, believe that love grows and it is not just something that happens at first sight, if you are interested in insects, want to cry, and hate the rich, this book might be for you.

Which genre(s) is it? Fantasy, historical.

What is the setting? The novel is set in the fictional country of Loisail, in a time that resembles the end of the 1800s.

How are the characters? The cast of characters is not overtly wide, but we have three different narrators - and by different I mean that they all feel widely different to each other, which I greatly appreciate. The secondary characters are less developed, but I do not think it's a bad thing. We get to know them through the three different POVs, and I actually think it's very nice when you see the wide differences in descriptions based on the relationship these people have with each other.

What are the strengths and weaknesses of the novel? The strength here lies, in my opinion, both in the world building and in the three POV characters. It's also pretty interesting how much they change throughout what is, overall, not too long of a book. The secondary characters, as stated above, could have used a bit more depth, but as I stated above it was not something that I strictly perceived as a weakness.

Did I cry and/or laugh? I cried so many times. I think I laughed once or twice. But books with well written pining make me cry and this is Well Written Pining.

Who shouldn’t read the book? There's a tad of brokenheartedness and cheating and betrayal, so just in case you are not in the mood for any or one of those please don't read the novel.

Any random comment? Silvia Moreno-Garcia can do no wrong imo.

Which quote stuck with me?

Nothing matters more than money to us, the Beautiful Ones who walk down these city streets in pristine gloves and silk-lined garments. You can give yourself the luxury of love because you are not one of us. That is why you are my friend: because despite everything, at heart you remain an innocent.

[aks-of-the-weak]

Incipit: My stupid fucking game doesn't work. These two stupid functions have like 450 lines together and the whole thing is like half a dozen for() loops all nested into each other nested into a while() loop. I tested it thoroughly. I thought i was done with it and put a nice bow and wrapping on it and sent it in the mail. Now i find that the recipient was always destined to be and that this gift is not a beautiful craft of art, but an abyss which beckons for my gaze just as it also beckons to gaze back. And i will gaze. But not today. Today is a day for coping. Today i will chain lose seven games of League of Legends, but sandwiched between those i will attempt a brand new coping method, #homestuck OC improv writing. Let's goooooooo.

3rd Post: Gemoloron, The Sign of the Potent. No, i'm not going to use That meaning of the word… i hope?

Constellation: Oh man, what could this one be? Maybe this bit represents eyes, but then what has ma— Biblically accurate angels. C'mon, I know it's a biblically accurate angel, you know it's a biblically accurate angel, even the homestuck redditors knew it was a biblically accurate angel. This brings up at least one question, is the Troll Bible a thing? The answer to that question is basically irrelevant, so i won't ponder it any further. I actually already know where i want to go for those first two paragraphs because i thought of it while writing the intro. You know what else has many eyes? That's right, Flies, and maybe dragonflies, and maybe basically half of all other bugs, but that includes Flies. A Fly's two eyes are actually compound eyes which contain thousands of individual lenses inside. There's probably a connection to make with Belzebub who's sometimes also an angel, but i don't really wanna. Point is, Rage being the aspect of Chaos and Goldies being the caste for duality makes them a match made in heaven (heh). The nature of this sign is all about contradiction, being both Gracious Holy Angel and Gross Disgusting Fly. This is a design i want to communicate in both the constellation and the lusus while emphasizing the eyes, so here's what i'm thinking about (see picture below) (i fucking hate insects, why did i pick this, i don't want to be editing a picture of one for many minutes) (Holy fuck, the GIMP perspective tool is awesome. Why have i never used that before??). Ok, so, facts first, this image is awful. It also kind of fucks (heh). A fly with human eyes, yet another mystical symbol. I really thought mystical symbol constellations weren't going to be a dime a dozen back when i was on the first post, yet here we are. As stated before it symbolizes Contradiction and Contrasts, but primarily between the Ugly and the Beautiful.

Lusus: Aight, i actually image edited the lusus too this time around. Gods, brace yourself because this one is also genuinely awful, no "it fucks" involved. (see picture below). This time instead of being a fly with angel (human) eyes it's an angel with Fly eyes. It reverses, because contradictions, contrasts. This guy is actually stupid as fuck, like fly-level intelligence. When the character is introduce we quickly notice that all their window are broken. Then, a bit later we hear a sound of broken glass from out of frame and the next panel pans out with this jackass with his head through a window trying to crawl out of it. Right next to him is a wide open door. He's at no risk of harming himself on the sharp glass tho, he's actually ~3m tall with physical strength enough to rival the Spidermom, but he's so stupid he can't use a weapon or even punch or kick. The only way he ever attacks is by flying at extreme speed and crashing his body into shit. Our character can't invite anyone to their home because this dude is too stupid to understand the concept of a "friend" and will just ram any and all that gets close to the house, killing it instantly. He's not vicious or anything, tho. When something aproaches he'll stand visibly and menacingly in the sky, meaning he mostly only ever murders wild animals too dumb to understand that warning. Finally, the only thing it ever does other than murder shit in the stupidest way possible and break windows trying to get in and out of the house is clean. Because flies do that. Any sign of dirt, dust or glass shard he sees gets broomed right out of the house. Because apparently he's smart enough to use his limbs for that. Ok dude.

Physicality: You might have noticed this lusus has a single clipped wing which i haven't mentioned. This is because i just added it, right now, after the lusus paragraph is done. Why? To establish numerology, of course. I have a last name to start this character with. Beluth. The name is a deformation of Belzebuth, another name of Beelzebub, but also alludes to the last symbolic element of the character which i will get to shortly. Beluth is, like many gold bloods, a powerful psion. Unlike most goldbloods, Beluth's powers are particularly stunted in the range department, allowing her to levitate objects no further than her arms' reach, which are fortunately rather long. She uses this power effectively through their kind abstratus, 5xRevlvrkind, by levitating each revolver simultaneously. Each revolver having, of course, 5 chambers per cylinder. For physical appearance, the eyes are pretty important so i'll start with that. Remember Die from The Felt? Remember that guy? Remember how he always has that look as if you just caught him doing something unspeakable at 3am. Essentially, that's Beluth's resting face, but she's self-conscious about it so she's grown out long bangs that covers her face. Beluth is a great fan of alternian "Western" movies (troll cowboy movies) and so dresses herself in a cowboy jacket, a large cowboy hat further obscuring her face and 6 revolver holsters stacked on top of each other. The middle left holster is always empty. Her body shape is very lanky, tall and thin, which gives her an intimidating/badass look when her face is covered and inversely furthers the crazed kinda bozo look when it's unveiled.

Personality: Finally to tie it all together. Rage is the aspect of Truth, Chaos and the Incomprehensible. The human-eyed fly is a constellation that symbolizes the contrast between the ugly and the beautiful. Gemolorn is titled the Sign of the Potent. That third element i feel isn't as important to be smoothly integrated so i'm writing it off as done from the generally high power level of the character and her lusus. The second is integrated from the previous paragraph, though subverted. "Ugly" has been replaced by "Gaunt, kinda bizarro look", Beluth's inner appearance, and "Beautiful" by "Cool badass cowboy look", the outer appearance which she has crafted for herself. The obvious arc from here is a "learn to let down the mask and accept yourself for who you are" narrative, but imo that fucking sucks right now. This style is something Beluth has made for herself, something that reflects her hobby and something that's partly fed from her inner appearance itself. So rather, as the story progresses, Beluth progressively goes from a fangirl simply mimicking cowboys to actually becoming one. she loses the hat, the jacket, even the bangs, yet she's still out there ridin' through the wasteland catchin' outlaws. "Quickest barrels this side o' the empire. She be shootin' so fast, even 'er shadow's surprised", says an old grizzled ranger drinking his whisky from the corner of a saloon. Get it? The crazed look itself becomes part of her mythos. You are the cowboy Beluth. it's you. I think that's pretty good over all. Her gunslinging style comprises particularly bouncy bullets that bounce all over creating an incomprehensible/chaotic barrage. It think that, plus everything before which kind of relates to finding an inner deeper Truth is enough to relate her to her aspect.

Excipit: I liked this character a lot. I hated the making of this post a lot. i meant for this series to be quick writing exercises for when i have a few hours to kill, but it turned out to be day-long endeavors, partly because of my chronic inefficiency at basically everything. i actually wrote the first and second half of it with a 1 and a half week gap between the two. Plus now i have to see it through because i thought of a decent way to recycle the signs and the ideas for the constellations for one of my games. Also, originally i meant for most of these characters to be ungendered because gender isn't usually relevant to the kind of characters i write. But that makes it marginally more of a pain to write so i'll just use whatever pronouns i hc them as. also i didn't use that meaning of the word. Congrats present me from past me.

[morbidsmenagerie]

I agree with the sentiment of this post. A lot of arthropods have been demonstrated to have much more complex intelligence and reasoning than mere biological machines, and have been suggested to have a lot of the building blocks of sentience such as the ability for abstract and transitive reasoning. Cephalopods and hymenoptera in in particular have a lot of interesting studies published on them, and cephalopods and decapod crustaceans are now recognized as sentient beings in the UK in part due to these studies. I think we'll find a lot more interesting things in other arthropods the more we look into it.

What I don't think should happen is I don't think we should make sweeping generalizations about arthropod sentience and intelligence or move into anthropomorphizing. Statements like these don't help improve the welfare of animals, they aren't practical or qualitative positions on how our laws and society should change to protect invertebrate welfare, and they tend to be unevenly applied to animals that are personable or more appealing to us. To be honest, even when we know animals have the capacity to feel pain that doesn't stop us from inflicting it. I thought the emotional and social capacities of rats was very well understood, it still baffles me that mass rearing rats for live feeding is socially accepted. I don't agree that we just don't consider insects to be animals because we fear our capacity to kill. People kill mammals we know can feel pain; people hunt, work at slaughterhouses, raise their own livestock, work in pest control, leave out rat traps, and feed carnivores live food.

I also don't really like how that article that's linked is written. One of my main problems with scientific reporting in popular journals is the tendency to obscure the actual contents of the paper for the sake of telling a good narrative.

For example, at on point in the article the states "But the bees don't go quietly. In work released earlier this year, scientists revealed that they scream – using an amplified, frantic version of their usual buzz. And though no one has conclusively tied the shrieks to an emotional response in the bees, the study's authors noted in their paper that these 'antipredator pipes' share similar acoustic features to the alarm calls of many other animals, from primates to birds to meercats, and might suggest that they're fearful."

When you look at the actual paper though, (link) the quote the article was paraphrasing says "Antipredator pipes share acoustic traits with alarm shrieks, fear screams and panic calls of primates, birds and meerkats. Workers making antipredator pipes exposed their Nasonov gland, suggesting the potential for multimodal alarm signaling that warns nestmates about the presence of dangerous hornets and assembles workers for defense." The rest of the paper suggest the meaning of this sentence was comparing the antipredator pipes of bees with alarm call of various birds and meerkats, a way to signal other animals in the hive to be on alert of a potential predator. This in itself is interesting! The paper even suggests they might have different kinds of calls depending on how dangerous the predator in the area is, and that bees use a rich variety of acoustic signaling. Alarm calls, even in mammals and birds, don't necessarily indicate fear, and it's misleading to describe the noise as a scream because it implies a level of emotion that the article does not mention.

In another part of the article, it states "However, there's emerging evidence that they can indeed feel pain as we know it – and not only that, they can experience it chronically, just like humans. One basic clue to the former is that, if you train fruit flies to associate a certain smell with something unpleasant, they will simply run away whenever you present them with it. 'They link together the sensory context with the negative stimulus, and they don't want that – and so they go away from it,' says Neely. When fruit flies are prevented from escaping, they eventually give up and exhibit helpless behavior that looks a lot like depression. But perhaps the most surprising results have emerged from Neely's own research, which has found that injured fruit flies can experience lingering pain, long after their physical wounds have healed. 'It's almost like an anxiety-like state, where once they've been injured, they want to make sure nothing else bad happens,' says Neely. The fruit flies' responses are thought to mirror what can happen in humans, when an injury leads to chronic 'neuropathic' pain."

This segment is surrounded with quotes from a professor of fundamental genomics (as an aside I don't know why they chose to interview Greg Neely, I assumed he was one of the authors of the paper they're citing but he isn't, they reference Professor Neely's own research but there's no link to it). From his quotations (in red), it doesn't seem like he's suggesting fruit flies can "feel pain as we know it" or that they experience anything like depression or chronic pain (notice how just neuropathic was quoted from his words).

The paper they do cite on this (link) is about learned helplessness. From the abstract it says "Here we investigate learned helplessness in Drosophila, showing that this behavioral state consists of a cognitive and a modulatory, possibly mood-like, component. A fly, getting heated as soon as it stops walking, reliably resumes walking to escape the heat. If, in contrast, the fly is not in control of the heat, it learns that its behavior has no effect and quits responding. In this state, the fly walks slowly and takes longer and more frequent rests, as if it were “depressed.”", which is probably where the comparison to depression came from. This description is still a far cry from "looks a lot like depression" from the BBC article, rather the authors are making a statement about the reduced activity in flies after the experimentation period.

Later in the paper they say "What makes learned helplessness in Drosophila particularly interesting is that the suppression of innate responses is accompanied by a reduction of walking activity and walking speed. The cognitive state of operant memory and the motivational state of passivity can be separately and quantitatively documented. Both components had contributed to the term “learned helplessness” in mammals...It will be interesting to find out whether the cognitive and the motivational components show the immunization effect to the same extent. Also, how closely the motivational component in flies resembles that in mammals further research must tell. Learned helplessness may have developed early in the evolution of animal behavior, well before the separation of the vertebrates and arthropods. Already at that time it was the major task of the brain to organize the animal’s behavior. Evidently, the behavior described here is not a disease or trauma. The fly copes with a stressful situation for which it has no ready-made answer in its behavioral repertoire (see also [4]). The suppression of escape and turnaround responses as well as the reduction of walking speed and activity are the fly’s adaptations to 10 min of being trapped in a small, dark hole and receiving dangerous heat pulses. The fly cannot do anything about the heat pulses. It can only try to optimize the balance between enduring and not missing a chance for escape. This balance may be different for males and females."

This is interesting in it's own right, and implies the fly having some sense of trying an action to avoid a stimuli, and when no action it tries has any effect on the stimuli it instead seeks to conserve energy and minimize damage as much as possible even after the stimuli stops. It's also interesting to note that this change was most prominent in female flies, which if you take the BBC article's wording at face value implies that females have a higher capacity to be "depressed" and experience trauma than male flies do, which I don't think is the implication they were going for.

My point is not that liking arthropods is wrong or illogical (I love arthropods), nor that arthropods are merely biological machines with no internal states. Clearly research has shown them to be much more intelligent and capable than a lot of people give them credit for, and their behaviors and cognitive abilities are impressive and worth looking into. My point is you can believe these things and advocate for arthropod welfare and a stronger consideration to the rights of arthropods without making misleading statements about their sentience or emotional states. I chose two examples for space but I highly recommend you read the actual articles the BBC article is citing and don't just take a citation being there at face value. I want to write another piece on how to read scientific articles and how presenting information like this leads to a lot of misinformation and poor policy in general because people take an assumed reputable source and trust the opinions of the person writing the article and how they're interpreting the research papers they're paraphrasing. Don't even take my word at face value to be honest, please actually read the articles I quote yourself, I skipped over a lot of stuff that I thought was very interesting and worth reading.

Also not to make a long post longer but highly recommend you check out The Edge of Sentience by Johnathan Birch, the book is open access and discusses what we know and don't know about sentience in other systems (including human organs, arthropods, and AI) and how we can make good policies and advocate for the welfare of these systems when we have so many unknowns about how they experience the world.

if you’ve ever kept any kind of bug as a pet (i used to raise madagascar hissing cockroaches, myself), then it is pretty obvious that they have feelings and are capable of great individuality and even personality among members of their own species. there is a tendency to not be willing to admit this, which i think comes from a place of convenience moreso than of ignorance. it’s not that people don’t know bugs are little animals, it’s that thinking of them that way makes life a bit more complicated. still, it’s not like i’m going to give up fly paper…

[the-unseen1]

The Higher Self

WALKING THE PATH TOGETHER

Part 8: The Higher Self

As the Seeker and the Mysterious Stranger leave the cave behind, they are slowly approaching the Third checkpoint. The Stranger watches each of his footsteps with great care. Both are silent.

As the Seeker and the Stranger cross the threshold of the archway gate, they both hear a heavenly chant singing:

“Checkpoint 3 saved”

“Thank god,” mumbles the Stranger silently. “We finally made it.”

The view is stunning. Wide fields of grass and flowers. Hills and mountains. Pine trees and waterfalls. The road is overgrown with weeds.

There is a sign on an obelisk, stating: “You are now entering the land of truth”

As the Stranger and the Seeker proceed on their path, the road ahead transitions more and more into a field of high grass. Until the road is no longer visible.

“Where is the path gone?” asks the Seeker.

“Truth is a pathless land,” responds the Stranger, as he continues walking.

Both of them silently walk through fields of high grass, surrounded by pine trees. They approach the edge of a forest. The ground is muddy. A little stream flows along. Fish are seen in the translucent water. The birds are singing a song.

“There is one thing, I don't quite understand,” says the Seeker after some time of silence. “Who are you actually talking to? Why are we even holding these conversations?”

“You see... What we are doing is becoming conscious of that, which lies in the unconscious. We are shining a light on the shadows, so to speak. We are not judging, resisting nor fighting what lies in the dark. We just want to see it. So we make the invisible visible. We talk about that, which no one talks about.”

“But why? What difference does this make?” asks the Seeker, as they slowly approach the end of the clearing, where the dark pine forest begins.

The Stranger grins.

“When your awareness shifts, your course changes as well.”

“I still don't quite get what you are saying...,” admits the Seeker.

“By looking at Love... by realizing its nature, we let Love flow through us. By seeing the Ego... by getting an insight into it's mechanisms... By realizing how it shapes our actions... We take away it's power. Can you see how powerful awareness truly is?”

“Okay... So that is what it is all about... But still... You are just telling me weird stories... I mean... Do you seriously think... That this will have any effect? No one will understand...”

The Stranger smiles. “It's enough, if YOU understand.”

The Seeker thinks for a moment, then they nod their hand. The Seeker and the Stranger both enter into the dark forest. The trees are covering the blue sky. The light is dim. There is no path. The ground is covered with moss, grass, dirt, fallen leafs, twigs, plants and bushes.

The Seeker looks at everything. At the trees, the plants, the ground, the insects, the butterflies. They listen to the birds, to the rustling of the wind, to the flowing stream.

“But what even is this here? Reality... Is this like a dream? Is this an illusion? It all feels so real...”

“Can't help it, I knew you'd ask it sooner or later... I don't think you will remember this anyway... So it's probably alright to break the fourth wall on this one...”

The mysterious stranger considers a thought, then they whisper into the Seekers ear:

“You are a character in a fictional story.”

A sudden strong gush of wind. The birds lift off from their trees. Crows screaming very loudly.

The Seeker turns around. “You mean that my identity is just a story I am telling my self?”

“No,” denies the Stranger. “You are a fictional character. Nothing here is real.”

“Okay I think I understand now,” says the Seeker. “You mean that metaphorically!”

“No...,” sighs the Stranger. “I mean it literally. You are not real.”

The Seeker scratches their forehead.

“Do you mean, that 'I' am not real... Because the Self is just an illusion?”

The Stranger takes a stick and paints a circle on the ground. With the stick, the Stranger points at the circle.

“So this circle is our universe. Everything is contained within this circle. This is where our story is taking place.”

Then the Stranger points outside the circle. “This is where the reader is.”

“Who is the reader?,” asks the Seeker curiously. “Is that god?”

“No,” responds the mysterious stranger with a playful grin. “Although sometimes they are asking themselves the same question.”

The Stranger waits for the Seekers reaction, but they scratch their head. The Stranger continues:

“You could call the reader your 'Higher Self'. The Reader exists outside this universe. Outside your story.”

The Seeker gives the Stranger their full attention. “That's interesting. What is this higher Self?”

The Stranger holds his Stick into the sun. Sunlight projects the sticks shadow on the ground.

“It's like when you hold a three-dimensional Object in the Sun, then it casts a Two-Dimensional shadow. You, are a simplified representation of your higher Self. Just like a 2-D shadow is a reflection of a 3-D object, you are the reflection of your higher Self. The one, who reads your story.”

The Seeker takes a stick and draws an even bigger circle around the one, that the Stranger drew.

“So... If I have a higher Self here in my universe... Does this Reader have a higher Self in their universe as well?”

“Yes,” confirms the Stranger and points outside of the outer circle.

“Outside the story of the Reader, there is a Higher Self as well. And the Reader is also just an representation of their own Higher Self. The higher Self is the one, who reads the Readers story. It has many names but no name could ever describe it. No word could ever catch it. The Reader's higher Self is beyond comprehension. Some call it 'Awareness' others would call it 'Consciousness'. This is the Readers higher Self. It's the one, that is aware of the words. It's the one, that Reads the meaning behind them. Anyway... We will discuss the topic of Consciousness another time... The only thing important right now is that you understand how this works. Even if you forget it again... Your subconscious will remember.”

“And is there anything beyond?” asks the Seeker curiously. “Are there like infinite levels of worlds above and beyond?”

“This is above my pay range... After we break the fifth we can discuss the higher realities in more detail.”

Suddenly the Seeker and the Stranger stop. There is an opening between the leafs. A big hole, through which bright light shines on a table with chairs. The table is covered with tablecloth. Silver and golden plates. Fine cutlery and goblets filled with wine. Lit candles. Steaming plates. Grilled Meat. Cooked rice. Baskets with exotic fruits. Freshly plucked. On the tables edge, a big pot with brown mushroom stew.

The Seeker stares at the scenery. Something feels wrong.

“Do you think it's okay to eat this?” asks the Seeker the Stranger. As they turn around, they see him stuffing his mouth with fruits, meat and vegetables.

There is an awkward silence between the two. The Seeker stares at the Stranger, as his chewing gets slower and slower. He maintains eye contact as he swallows, while grabbing the next chicken wing and slowly shoving it in his mouth.

“Are you not afraid, that the food may be poisoned? I mean this entire place here literally screams 'Danger'.”

The Stranger stops chewing. A sudden realization dawns on him.

“Oh damn... you might be right,” shouts the mysterious stranger as a Banana slips out of his hand. “I didn't even consider that.”

The mysterious stranger suddenly twitches with his eyes. He feels a pain in his stomach.

The Seeker shakes their head.

“Why the hell do you just eat some random food on a strange table in the middle of a dark forest?”

“I just couldn't restrain myself,” shouts the Stranger, as he crawls on the floor in pain.

“It looked too damn delicious.”

The Seeker rolls their eyes, as they take a closer look at the food as well. Something smells very delicious. A fragrance emanates from a pot with mushroom stew. The Seeker lifts the ladle from the stew. Their mouth fills up with water. Eyes full of desire stare at the soup, licking their lips.

The Seeker can't hold back any longer and devours the entire stew. Licking the pot clean. The Seeker feels a sudden calmness emerging from within them. They lie down in the grass and close their eyes. Geometric patterns. A warm feeling in their heart. Shivers flowing down their spine.

As the Seeker opens their eyes again, they look up above. Through the hole in the dense blanket of leafs. They can see the blue sky, the clouds and the sun. They feel the suns warmth radiating on their skin.

Suddenly the Seekers eyes are blown wide open, after going through the same conversation from a different angle. They understand it. Everything is clear now. Their mind is blown. They start laughing.

A door manifests itself out of thin air, right in front of the Seeker. They swallow their spit and reach for the handle. Sweaty palms. Their body starts vibrating.

But the Stranger intercepts. He grabs the Seekers wrist. The fire in his eyes is flaring up. His voice sounds particularly serious, as he calmly but firmly speaks:

“No. You are not yet ready.”

The Seeker pulls away from the Strangers grip and touches the door handle with their index finger. Suddenly everything around the Seeker starts shaking, as the door frame in front crumbles down. Even the air starts vibrating. The table breaks down. Cracks forming in the earth. The trees are falling.

Everything fades to black. The light fades, utter darkness. Memory lost, the cycle starts anew.

TO BE CONTINUED

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START JOURNEY HERE

[jaybug-jabbers]

The reptile expo was very interesting to check out yesterday. It was my first expo experience. Definitely geared towards reptiles of course but a decent number of invert people were also vending.

Among the invert crowd, arachnids definitely dominated, mostly tarantulas, as well as jumping spiders and some scorpions. Also some centipedes and milipedes. Almost no insects (other than feeders of course), but saw a random katydid. Surprised at the lack of mantids.

Loads of animals overall being sold, but also a decent amount of pet supplies being sold too. I bought some more cork bark hides. Somebody was selling isopod chow but it was mostly ground corn and other grains and didn't really interest me.

Strangely, a large number of children were there. That took me by surprise, it wasn't really an event for children, it was an expo for selling 'exotic' pets. I had the feeling many parents were using it as a sort of 'zoo' for their kids, lol. But I suppose there's no harm in that, the animals were carefully monitored by the vendors after all and it's good to spark interest in these lovely creatures. So long as the parents are not buying these animals without due diligence in researching their proper care and handling, of course.

Some people from a local zoo were also there (I didn't notice which zoo), they brought a few animals to show off to the crowds and give a little educational talk, an alligator and a snapping turtle.

Unfortunately, there were not many vendors actually selling isopods. Perhaps four vendors in total? I saw a lot of Cubaris and Porcellio species being sold, but I am not currently interested in getting those. (Waiting to be more experienced before I try Cubaris. As for Porcellio, they reproduce too much, I'd rather not be overwhelmed by their numbers.) Also a lot of Vulgare Magic Potions, they seem to be very popular! I did see a few folks selling Zebras but alas, no color morphs for the Zebras.

I spoke with some of the vendors, too. Trying to see how many of them were local. After all it would be cool to have local people who are into the hobby. The ones I spoke to all reported driving out to this expo from a neighboring state, unfortunately. It seems isopod people are a bit spread out here. Still, I'm in California . . . there's bound to be some folks not too far who are into them. There's a lot of people here, after all!

I may not have found Chocolate Zebras, but I didn't walk away empty-handed. I ended up buying ten Armadillidium c.f. espanyoli "Marbelized." A species I had read about online and thought was very lovely. I moved them individually with a spoon to their new enclosure because I was paranoid about dwarfs (the vendor was selling them too and I've read such horror stories about them), thus the spoon in the photo.

Sadly when I got home, I found several were defintiely dead, though. There's also three that have been curled in a ball and have yet to uncurl and I worry they are dead too. I will leave them for several more days but don't hold out hope. If they are indeed dead, it means I only have 6 live individuals, which is unfortunate. Hopefully the remainders can establish a colony anyway. No way of knowing until we wait and see.

(Note: I left for home pretty much as soon as I purchased them and transported them in an air-conditioned car a very short distance to my house, so I know the poor lads didn't expire thanks to me.)

Focusing on the positive, though-- they really are a gorgeous species. Small but beautiful. The one in the photo is smaller than the others, a juvenile got tossed in the mix. Anyway, they apparently love a lot of humidity which is not a problem because I love to hydrate my pods. They are supposedly not especially shy but they will definitely be harder to see when there's so few of them and they are so small. If I can get a larger colony going though they should be very fun to watch. Perhaps when it cools down a bit (still triple-digit weather outside, this summer has been intense) I could buy some more via mail.

[musiclovingmoth]

making my own post as a totally minor addendum to that last reblog: even the best collections in the world fall short on taking care of their stuff in some small ways and i think (with my short few years of experience so far) it's partly because even the best collections are short-staffed. my coworkers with full-time permanent positions seemed regularly swamped with work that should really be divided among more people and i KNOW they want the best for the collections, it's just we all have our limits to what we can do even for the things we love, especially at a job. just speaking for entomology, the largest collections in the world contain millions of specimens which means countless drawers and cabinets to be actively watching over. my ento dept has like 3 active curators, 1 collections manager (that's typical tho although she actually manages ALL of invertebrate zoology), and 5 full-time museum specialists to care of nearly 20 million insect specimens representative of each order and including types.

additionally, natural history collections often have few paid positions open. even fewer WELL-paid jobs that don't require a graduate degree. it sucks because i know just by being on social media that there's a number of incredibly intelligent and eager people who would love to do the menial work required to keep a collection running if only it paid a decent wage.

tl;dr i think some state of disrepair in natural history collections is attributable to the fact that museums often leave huge amounts of specialized work to too few people and don't pay many of them well enough