#and by the time Cece comes he’s like a pro

[atsvmi]

Isagi’s Interlude

“I wish I wasn’t famous/ I wish I was still in school/ So that I could have you in my dorm room/ I would put it on you crazy” - Cece’s Interlude, Drake

✿ tags: minors dni, 18+ content, pro!Isagi, fem!reader (called good girl, wears a skirt, has cleavage, etc.), established relationship, mention of an age difference (reader is older than Isagi, both are in their 20s), consensual audio recording, role play (university students), switch!Isagi, switch!reader, oral (male receiving), humping, unprotected sex, mentions of virginity but neither is a virgin, purity kink, corruption kink (?), one mention of a spoiler, tbh i think this is pwp but idk

✿ wc: 3.5k

✿ a/n: the time has come that i officially am no longer catfishing as a writing blog🥳 please clap. also, this is my first time writing smut so please be kind<3

“Do you think we’d still date if we knew each other when we were in school?”

Your question is a random but welcomed conversation as you both work to reset your shared kitchen after dinner, you wash as he dries. In the seconds between the next clean dish, he pauses to consider his answer, before choosing to reach for low-hanging fruit.

“Do you mean high school? If so then...I hope not,” he finally answers. He can’t help but laugh as you fling the excess water and soap from your fingers onto him in indignation.

“No, I didn’t mean fucking high school. And quit making me seem like a fucking cradle robber, asshole.” You’ve been together long enough that the four-year age difference between the two of you is little more than a fun fact and a harmless joke at times. He can sense your annoyance is mostly for show but he chooses not to push any further.

“Ok, ok. I’m sorry,” he manages to get out between chuckles, fending himself from the assault of suds. Again he pauses to really think about what could’ve been. What would he have studied? Would he manage to get into a university with a good team? How would you manage to cross paths? He realizes it’s hard to consider anything when he doesn’t know much about your own school experience outside of the anecdotal stories you’ve told him.

“Tell me what you were like in school first.”

You resume washing the dishes, multitasking as you answer him.

“Um…pretty lame honestly. I wrote for the school’s newspaper. I wasn’t super active on campus but that made me get out there more than I would’ve on my own. But I did go to some parties.”

He lets your answer sink in.

“Yeah, I think we would’ve still got along. You don’t sound like you were much different from now so I don’t see why not.”

Out of the corner of his eye, he can see your lips turn slightly up, pleased with his answer. Cute.

“Do you ever think about your life if things turned out differently? Like if Blue Lock never happened?”

He can’t say he has. Blue Lock changed his life on its head completely, it’s hard to imagine things working out any differently. Tada and the others he went to school with were freshly graduated, at least according to their social media updates, so he supposes he would be too. Yet still, it’s hard to think about something so different than today.

“I dunno. I can’t really picture it. Actually, I don’t even want to. If I didn’t go to Blue Lock then who knows if I’d ever get the chance to play the soccer I want to. I’d probably never get to play professionally either.” He lets his train of thought wander, eventually realizing that without playing professionally, who knows if he’d ever cross paths with you. He buries the thought before it can even fully form and upset himself in the process.

“Yeah, that’s fair,” you conclude as you hand him the final dish. “I’m gonna get ready for bed. Can you just finish up here by sweeping?”

He nods in the affirmative, which you thank with a kiss that just misses his lips before leaving in the direction of the bedroom. Left with only his thoughts he can’t help but think a bit more about what could’ve been.

Obviously, he’d continue playing soccer as long as possible. Sure his high school team wasn’t amazing, but maybe through tryouts he’d end up at a decent enough school. And he’s always liked art class. Maybe he would’ve tried to pursue a fine arts degree? Or physical therapy to help athletes just in case soccer really didn’t pan out. But what then? For someone who’s built an entire soccer career around the ability to visualize a scenario, he really can’t help but to draw a blank.

Distracted by being in his own head, finishing around the kitchen takes longer than usual. When he finally manages to make his way to your shared room, he just manages to hear the sink’s water turn off, a sign that you’re at the tail end of your nightly routine.

He turns down the bed, first removing the many throw pillows you insist are necessary (a mild point of contention in his opinion. After all, what good is a pillow you’re not even allowed to lay on?) and then making himself comfortable using the “sleeping pillows” to prop himself up against the headboard, occupying himself by scrolling on the phone while he waits for you to make your way to bed. Despite it being the off-season he’s scheduled to meet with a trainer to maintain his conditioning so an early night is in order.

The click of the bathroom door opening draws his eyes but more importantly, what you’ve decided to wear to bed has his full attention.

“Baby, you look-” he starts before you cut him off.

“Is this still a good time for the interview?”

“Interview?”

He’s never been so confused in his life. And even worse, he can’t even dedicate half of his mind to start to comprehend what you’re playing at when he’s busy eyeing you from head to toe. The only thing on his mind is the oversized replica of his Bastard München jersey you’ve tied at your waist and the shortest skirt he’s ever seen. If he were to turn you around he’s sure that it’d cover absolutely nothing he’s sure a skirt is meant to. But even more captivating is the pair of thigh highs that indent into your skin the same way his fingers do when he-

“Yes? The post-game interview. I was hoping to get a quote for the paper from the player that scored the winning goal.”

“Uhh…” Is the most intelligent answer he can muster as he watches you climb onto the bed with a pad of paper and pen in hand. The size of the jersey only frames your cleavage as it gapes open thanks to gravity. Eventually, you make yourself comfortable, legs tucked under you and pen poised to take notes of his response.

“Is it ok if I record this,” you ask, sliding your phone on the nightstand, voice recorder rolling once he manages a stiff nod of his head. You continue. “So what were you thinking in that last play? It was pretty amazing if I say so myself.”

“Winning goal?” He should feel embarrassed by the way he can’t pull his eyes from your legs but the slither of skin between where your skirt ends and the socks begin is calling his name. It’s like he’s in high school again the way he can feel the blood rush from his head. Only your groan of annoyance gives him the strength to meet your eyes again.

“Babe, it’s called role play,” you say as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. Maybe in some ways, it is.

“Right. Role play.” A beat passes. “What exactly are the roles we’re playing?”

The look you give him makes his cock twitch in his pants.

“Obviously, you’re the star of our university’s soccer team and I am the reporter assigned to cover the season. You just scored the championship goal. Aaaand scene,” you drop your pen and paper to clap for extra effect and then grab both again, poised and ready for his answer.

Truthfully, he can hardly keep up with your antics but that’s never stopped him from trying. He’s had enough practice managing eccentric personalities from the cast of characters Blue Lock managed to put together so this is nothing but a cakewalk. The fact he’s in love with you only makes your idiosyncrasies endearing.

“Right.” He clears his throat, buying time. “I try to keep a cool head and focus on the field whenever I’m playing. A championship game doesn’t change that.”

You scratch something down on the notepad before continuing.

“And how do you feel now that you’ve won?”

“It’s a big achievement to win the championship for the school, and even more so to be the one to finish the game. I just hope to do even better next year.”

This time you jot away a bit longer, leaving his attention to wander back to your outfit. He reaches out a hand to appreciate the getup, running his hand up your knee to just under the hem of your skirt.

“Mr. Isagi you seem pretty distracted. Are you sure this is still a good time?”

“Call me Yoichi”. He doesn’t move his hand away when he answers.

Again you put down your props, seemingly for good as they rest next to your phone.

“I suppose this is probably too boring of a celebration for a star player like yourself. I should probably let you go back to the team for a proper congratulations. I’m sure you have quite the fan club waiting for you.”

“I doubt it. I’ve never been that popular.”

With that, you scoot closer, letting your legs fall open so that he can get the slightest glimpse between your legs if your skirt were to ride up even the slightest centimeter.

“That sounds doubtful. Who wouldn’t want a chance with Isagi Yoichi? Ace of the soccer team. Handsome and nice to boot.”

Despite complimenting his personality, your attention is focused on his physique, eyes roaming across his body appreciatively. He doesn’t fail to notice that you linger a second longer where the sheets have started to tent.

“Do you think it’d be ok if I properly congratulated you,” you ask, resting a hand on the sheet, ready to pull it away at a moment’s notice. You both have a healthy sex life, both well accustomed to initiating, but it’s rare for you to be so forward. He might pass out if you wait any longer to touch him.

“Congratulations? What did you have in mind?” Is all he can get out, forcing you to get straight to the point.

“Let me suck your cock. As a congratulations on a job well done.” Your hand cups his length through both the layers of the sheet, his joggers, and underwear, but he swears he could still cum with the slightest amount of friction he’s so wound up.

“Yeah. Yes. Please.” He’s near breathless, he wants you so badly.

Not a second is wasted before you have him bare from the waist down. He completes the look by pulling his shirt over his head, throwing the offending article wherever it chooses to land. All the while, you shimmy yourself down between his legs. Sure he’s the one fully naked but the eroticism of the sight before him already has him on the brink of cumming.

His name emblazoned between your shoulder blades is something he still has yet to learn to be normal about, but more than that, he finds that he was right about your skirt not covering an inch of your backside. However, what he wasn’t expecting was for it to perfectly frame the curve of your ass since you’ve apparently decided to forego underwear.

“Fuck me,” he gets out in only a puff of air.

“In due time, Mr. Yoichi,” is all you offer before kissing the mushroom tip, smearing the precum that’s collected on your lips, and then swallowing all that will comfortably fit in your mouth. It takes all the strength he can muster to not instinctively buck into you but he can’t hide the deep groan that comes out involuntarily as he meets the entrance of your throat.

“Fuck. You’re so good at this. Always so good,” he offers as he bundles your hair into his fist, slowly guiding you up and down his length. The praise leads you to moan around him, getting him even closer to the brink of cumming.

To get a better view he props himself up on one shaky arm, massaging all that he can reach, as you use your other hand to fondle his balls. Mere minutes pass before he starts to feel the familiar pit of pleasure begin to grow in his belly and it takes all his willpower to pull you off of him before he cums from the added stimulation. It’s next to a miracle that he manages to hold off even after he’s pulled you off once he sees the thick strings of saliva that still connect the two of you.

“I wasn’t done yet,” you have the audacity to pout.

“I didn’t want to cum yet,” he answers. Even to his own ears, he sounds debauched.

While still catching his breath he pulls you close, encouraging you to straddle him. You do and let out quiet moans as you rut your bare pussy against his length. Despite being so close to cumming before, he’s happy to let you do as you please. When your legs eventually tire, he switches to using both hands on your waist to manhandle you the way he knows you like.

“Tell me how you feel, sweetheart.” He can’t get enough of your sounds, no matter how small. To see how much of a mess you’re making he flips the front of your skirt, his tip coming in and out of view as he rocks you back and forth.

“So good, Yoichi. Your hands feel so good.”

He knows it’s not enough to get you off, that you need more. Eventually, he stops, pulling you down so that your chests meet. If you really want to role play, he figures he should get into the role he’s been assigned.

“Is there more to my award,” he asks, hands roaming under the jersey and under your skirt. There’s nowhere his hands don’t explore while he waits for your answer.

“W-what more do you want?”

He moves his right hand so that it’s between your bodies, spreading your pussy lips so that he can fully appreciate the wetness that’s accumulated. He uses his full palm to rub your clit while he answers.

“You said you’d fuck me in due time, yeah? Or were you all talk?”

“Um…about that.” Your eyes are fluttering, struggling to stay open and focus on his words. He feels like he’s on top of the world seeing how he can ruin you. “I have to t-tell you something.”

“I’m listening baby.” His voice is muffled as he leaves kisses across your neck and cheeks. Anywhere he can reach while you still use him to get off.

“I’ve never done this before.” Your eyes meet.

The proverbial record scratches and again he’s confused.

“What do you mean, you’ve never done this before?” Sure you both have busy schedules but there’s no way this is new to either of you. As a matter of fact, it couldn’t be more than a week since he had you in this exact position-

“I was a virgin when I got to college,” you whisper directly in his ear.

Again you have the upper hand as it feels like he’s been doused with a bucket of ice. The feeling only lasts a second though before it feels like every nerve lights up once he connects that this is still a part of the scene you’ve conjured. Oh.

The idea of you as a virgin has never crossed his mind once until this very moment. Given the age you were when you met, he had no reason to give it consideration. It’s not like he was even a virgin when you met. He makes a mental note to do some soul-searching later to find out why he’s rock hard and nearly brought back to the brink of cumming at the mere idea.

“Do…do you want to keep going?”

You laugh. A full out belly laugh.

“Yoichi, you're so cute. Only you would still be so considerate even in a fantasy.”

If all the blood in his body wasn’t occupied he’d probably blush at your teasing.

“I fucking love you,” you emphasize with a kiss. “Yes, I want to continue.”

Not another word is needed before he’s fully plunged back into the world you’ve created. No, he's never thought about you as a virgin but now that the seed has been planted he’s going to absolutely ruin you.

Within a breath, he’s switched your positions, now with you on your back and him pulling your legs onto his lap as he sits above you.

“Tell me if anything is too much, ok?” He preambles before he sucks both his ring and middle fingers, slowly pushing in one finger, then the other when he deems you ready.

Now that you’re fully on display for him he can’t help but stare. Again, the skirt hides absolutely nothing but he does push the jersey so that your tits are on display for him as well. Seeing you dressed but so exposed has his head swimming.

“You’re so pretty. Prettiest thing I’ve seen on campus.” If he’s going to play along, then he might as well go all out.

He bends at the waist to take in one tit, using his tongue to lick at and bite your nipple, before turning his attention to the other all the while he doesn’t stop pumping his fingers into you.

“Yoichi, please. I need you,” you whine.

He takes pity on you and moves from your chest and back up to your lips, kissing you deeply. God, he’s so in love with you.

“I’m sorry, baby. I just wanted to make sure you were good and ready. I want to make sure I don’t hurt you.”

“I promise I’m ready.”

“Ok, ok. I hear you. But can you do me a favor and clean my fingers for me?”

As soon as his request hits his ears your mouth falls open in a way that can only be described as obedient. He lets you suck at both his fingers until he removes them himself, the way your tongue slips between them turning him on all the more.

“So good for me. I really am a lucky guy, huh?” He watches you preen under his praise as he reaches next to your head for an extra pillow, lifting your hips to situate it underneath you.

“Ok, if you need me to stop just tell me, ok? For any reason.” You nod your head yes.

“Need to hear you say it.”

“Yes, Yoichi. I promise.”

“That’s my good girl.”

He locks his hand in yours before he finally presses into you, both of you moaning as he works his hips into you. It’s a fantasy, sure, but he’s as mindful as he can be to be slow and let you get accustomed to him, even if it’s far from your first times, or even 48 hours since he last fucked you.

He’s captivated by the way your mouth falls open as he fucks into you. It’s familiar but entrances him every time. When you give the go ahead he increases his pace, working at that spot he knows gets you there the fastest.

“More, need more,” and he knows exactly what you need, licking his thumb before rubbing against your clit in tight circles. It’s only through time and experience that he knows exactly how to work your body, confirmed by the way you babble his name as if it’s the only word you know.

“You’re taking me so well. Feel so good, so tight. Can feel you squeezing me. You gonna cum for me?”

“Yeah. Gonna cum for you. So fucking close.” You’re wrecked.

“I know, baby. Tell me what you need.”

“Kiss me.”

Your wish is his command, him meeting your waiting mouth. It’s barely a kiss as you can hardly meet his mouth between your moans but he swallows them all dutifully. It’s when your back arches and you fall near silent beside one final cry of his name does he know that you’re cumming. He pulls away to watch you fall apart.

“That’s my girl. So beautiful. Let it out for me.” The vice around his cock makes it difficult to fuck you through your orgasm but he powers through. Only once you relax does he rut into you a few more times before he loses himself, filling you as deeply as he can manage.

It’s silent once he collapses next to you, both catching your breath. When he catches his breath before you he departs with a peck to your lips before he leaves for the bathroom, returning with a damp rag.

“If that’s what I missed out on then I wouldn’t have minded going to school,” he breaks the reverie, cleaning between your legs before his cum has a chance to cool and become uncomfortable.

“Well, I’m glad everything worked out the way it did. Now I can have you all to myself,” you smile at him. He thinks his heart might burst.

“Yeah…that’s true too. Maybe everything worked out the way it did so that we could meet each other?”

“God, you're so sappy. Gross.” You both know you don’t mean it.

“Yeah, yeah. I love you too.” He once again bends at the waist to meet your lips. Gross or not he’s glad things aligned to this very moment.

You meet him halfway, sitting up on one arm to brush away his damp bangs. When you pull away you meet his gaze.

“I really, really do fucking love you, Yoichi”.

Yeah, he’s sure he’d meet you in every universe.

[abbatoirablaze]

Princess & Bunny, Chapter 9

Word Count: 1.5k

Warnings: angst

“You won’t know until you try…”

Ransom frowned as he heard what Jake Jensen had been saying, “only pathetic cubs believe that saying, Jensen…we’re men.  Alphas…we don’t believe in those silly little sayings.”

“The saying has nothing to do with being a cub,” he chuckled nervously.  Ransom gave him a firm look and Jake sighed, pushing his glasses back up the bridge of his nose, “all I’m saying is that you seem to really like this Bunny chick…even though she’s your stepsister.  So what’s stopping you, huh?  What’s really stopping you?”

“She’s my mate, Jensen…we have a cub together!”  Ransom explained, “and she just up and disappeared!  I don’t know where to begin!  But that’s my family, Jensen.  My pack.  My cub.  My mate!”

“A cub that you thought was the other ones up until the other day…”

“Princess and my mom were manipulating me the whole time, Jensen…that’s what I’m trying to say,” he sighed sadly, “I-I didn’t even realize it at the time, but that’s what was happening…all these years they’ve been keeping us apart.  What kind of shit alpha am I that I didn’t even notice my mate right beneath my nose?  Huh?  It’s all because of Linda and Princess…that’s why.  Princess gave me all the attention that I craved.  I-”

“I’m sure it’s not just Princess’ fault,” Jake offered as he cut his frat brother off, “Maybe Bunny asked her to help out.  May-“

“No…it was Princess and my mom,” Ransom said with a firm shake of his head, “my mom always wanted to protect Bunny at all costs.  And Princess always just wanted me.  The two of them forced her to be quiet about it…I just know it.  I mean…when we were kids…when we first met, I felt this electricity every time that I was around her.  And it was like she felt it too…at the time I-I just thought it meant that we were close, but when I started presenting Cece got angry that I’d spend time around Bunny.  She-“

“Maybe she thought you were her mate…”

“No, Jensen…Cece is a materialistic, shallow omega,” he said with a shake of his head, “she just wanted me because I was the best that she could get at the current time…hell, I’ve bet you’ve seen the way she eyes up some of the guys…has she ever even said so much as a word to you?”

Jake frowned, “i-I don’t think she knows that I exist…”

“And she won’t,” Ransom grunted, “because that’s the type of woman she is.  She only wants designer.  Barber comes from money.  Pronge found a way to make his.  Steve and Buck are gonna go pro once they graduate.  Cece only wants the guy that’s got the most power…and in that time, the idea of her being the mother of my cub…that gave her all the power…”

“Well, what did Bunny want?”

“What she always wanted,” Ransom sighed, taking a long swig from the bottleneck, “to be-“

Jake quirked his brow.  Ransom had stopped himself from taking another swig.  It was like a light went off in his head. 

“Drysdale?”

“I-I think I know where I need to go,” he said quickly, putting his bottle down on the kitchen counter, “Jensen…you’re a genius!”

“Thanks,” he smiled nervously, pushing his glasses back up the bridge of his nose again, “go-good luck with Bunny, Drysdale.”

“Good luck with your mate problems too!” Ransom said wholeheartedly, “you should tell her…find out wherever she is on campus and find her…”

“Yeah,” Jake muttered to himself as he peeled away the label on the bottle, his eyes trailing through the kitchen and into the living room where three of his frat brothers were chatting her up, “first I have to get her to acknowledge my existence…”

“You need to tell her Jensen…”

Jake looked up at his chapter president and long-time friend, “she doesn’t want me, Andy…she hasn’t tried to look for me all week.”

“You don’t know that,” Andy shrugged to his friend, “I mean sure she’s been sleeping around a lot, but maybe-“

“Watch your words, Barber!” he growled angrily, his eyes ringed in a heavy amber color, “she’s my mate…regardless of what she’s been doing.”

“I was just going to say that maybe she’s been doing the Cinderella method…but instead of searching for a glass slipper, she’s seeing who’s knot fi-“

Jake growled, and Andy stopped talking.

“Princess isn’t just some whorish, self-absorbed omega.”

“I never said she was.”

“Well, it’s how everyone seems to think of her,” Jake grumbled from his spot on the floor, “when we were together…I-it all felt right.  There’s more to her than she shows  people.”

“That’s why you need to tell her, before you go completely feral.”

“Yeah,” he scoffed, “h-how is she doing, anyways?”

“You were right,” Andy admitted with another frown, “Pronge went after her again with some insta-heat…drugged the poor thing.”

“I smell her on you!” Jake said pointedly, “is she-“

“I didn’t knot her,” Andy replied dryly, “if you don’t happen to remember I have my own girlfriend, thank you very much.  I don’t need to knot your mate, Jensen.  Princess just got a bit…handsy.  I have her in your room…and your scent is calming her down just enough that it’s not unbearable for her.  But Kemp said her mate sickness is getting worse…”

“I saw Kemp today too…”

“I know,” Andy admitted, “I asked him to come down and see you…you’re getting worse too, Jake…it’s going on a week since the two of you marked each other.  You need to go to her before you both go feral.”

Jake reached up, his hand deftly gliding over the mark.  It had begun to heal, but Jake felt a little loss after not having his mate since the night that the two of them had marked one another.

“I-I can’t…” Jake whimpered as a shiver ran down his spine.  His nails dragged lightly over the healing teeth marks, and he closed his eyes, thinking about her, “I-I can’t let her see me like this.”

“Hughie!”

Ransom growled, his nostrils filling with the sweet scent of her.  Her eyes lit up, but she was quick to push herself up in the bed, a fear lurking in her eyes, “Wait!  Ho-how did you get here?”

“Not important,” the alpha growled sensually, stepping towards the omega.  But he stopped himself when he heard the soft whimpers of a baby.  Her eyes snapped tearily to his, “is that what I think it is…omega...”

A tear slipped out of her eyes as she nodded, looking at him, “K-Kingston Hugh Drysdale…I-I’ve had a few days to think about the name…”

Ransom felt a surge of happiness coursing through him as he rushed the bed, sitting on the edge of it, “our cub…”

“Yes…” she nodded, a few more tears slipping down her cheeks, “H-he’s our cub, Hughie…”

“Oh Cece,” he cooed sadly, reaching forward to stroke her cheek.  She closed her eyes, a few more tears slipping down her cheeks, “he-he’s beautiful…god…our cub.  He-he’s fucking perfect…”

“Yeah…” she sighed sadly, looking at the cub, “h-he looks just like you…you know…your kind eyes…your bratty temperament.”

Ransom smiled at the soft joke, “he’s got your heart…i-I can sense it about him…he’s strong like you too…”

“I-I know I shouldn’t say this…but I’m glad you managed to find us before Linda moved us again,” she sighed, eyeing her alpha.  She reached out and stroke his cheek, and Ransom all but melted into her touch, “I-I love you Hughie…”  

Ransom growled. 

He’d thought for sure she’d return to the house his mother had tucked her away in when she gave birth. 

His heart ached as he looked around the room. 

Aside from everything having been laundered, it looked almost identical to how it had just a few years ago when she had given birth to their cub. 

“Y-you should go…”

Ransom frowned as he looked into her eyes, “you don’t mean that…”

“Linda…sh-she’ll come back soon…with my sister….an-“

“I paid the doc and nurses to leave Cece…we have the whole place to ourselves…and the alarms will tell me once they cross the gate…”

“Hughi-“

But she was cut off by his lips crashing against hers.  She whimpered, melting into his touch, and Ransom felt like his whole body was on fire.  Every nerve was responding to her touch as he held her body close to his. 

“I love you, Cece…” he proclaimed slowly when he pulled away, “I-I don’t want Linda to tear us apart…you’re my mate…”

“Oh Hughie,” she sighed sadly, stroking his cheek, “I wish-“

“Run away with me…” he offered gently, “we could run away with Kingston.  I know grandpa Harlan would understand…he’d help us hide from my mo-“

“I-I can’t leave, Hughie!” she whimpered, “I-I have to stay here.”

He looked over to where the bassinet still sat. 

Kingston was far too big for it now, but it was like he could picture his son in it, just a few days old.  With a heavy sigh he reached out to it.  The white fabric felt foreign beneath his touch. 

“I need to find you and your mom, buddy,” he whispered to the open air, “I just need to find you and I swear, we can be a family…”  

Chapter 10

Tag List:  Tag List:  @lohnes16, @tenaciousperfectionunknown, @prokey16, @magnificentsaladllama

[daveysjackie]

Masterlist of all the Kelly-Jacobs kids I have made for my numerous AUs

Honestly, this is mostly so I can keep track of these scamps and my AUs. But I'm putting them here so enjoy

(Also, if you have any questions about the characters or the AUs, please ask, i love talking about my AUs)

My New Dream (single Dad Jack AU)

Faith Cecelia Kelly (Later Kelly-Jacobs)

The only child in this AU

She commonly goes by Fae

Named because of Jack's dream of Santa Fe (yeah Jack really sprained a brain muscle naming his kid)

She also gains the moniker of his "little fairy"

When Davey finds out her full name, he calls her Cece.

(He is the only person that is allowed to call her that. Not even Jack is allowed)

She was born soon after Jack moved to Santa Fe for college and he had a one night stand

She doesn't remember much of her life before meeting Davey when the move to NYC when she's 3

Discovers she's a lesbian when she's 7 and brings her first girlfriend home at age 10

Davey introduces her to baking when she's 5 and by the time she's 20, she is a pro baker on the cusp of owning her own little bakery

The Intricate Chaos Of You (Davey's band AU)

Stella Kelly-Jacobs

She was born via surrogate. Unlike both her dads having dark hair, she is blonde

Because of her blonde hair (and Jack and Davey always using the stars as endearments towards each other (because of Davey's song)) they name her Stella

Unlike her dads, her musical talent is limited to playing the recorder (badly)

She does have Jack's artistic talent

She either wants be a fashion designer or an inventor. There is no in-between and she changes her mind every other day

She is not very fond of the reporters and fans they deal with constantly so she loves it whenever they go back to Santa Fe because it's much more peaceful there

That being said, she has used her dads' fame to get out of trouble in school multiple times.

David Jacobs Guide To Dealing With A Bad Roommate (AKA my roommate AU)

Oliver Kelly Jacobs

He's told the story of how his dads started dating when he was 12

Jack never hears the end of it

What do you mean Aba had to get SHOT for you to confess you like him?

I was going to but the burglers got to him first

He's a little daredevil. He does flips on roller-skates, skateboards and bikes

(His dads dread when he starts learning to drive)

His dream occupation changes about twice a year

Unfortunately for his dads, he never chooses a safe job

(Jack's first grey hair is before he even hits 30 and he 100% blames Ollie)

Even In Silence

Connie Kelly-Jacobs

The oldest of her siblings

In the last chapter of EIS, she's 14

She's named after Connie Francis (who her grandfather (Jack's dad (Francis Sullivan) was named after)

She's loud all of the time (something picked up from all the time spent with Uncle Race)

She loves her siblings but is always in a competition with her brother.

It could be anything: homework, eating, brushing their teeth, she turns it into a competition

She could win everytime if she wants but she makes sure her brother wins just as many times (keeps a tally per week on her phone)

Fitz Kelly-Jacobs

His name comes from JFK's middle name (because his dad's (Jack's) aunt was named after Jackie Kennedy)

He is the middle child and only boy

In the last chapter of EIS he's 12

Almost the complete opposite of his older sister, he's very quiet.

Not that he doesn't talk. More like Ferb from Phineas and Ferb. Only speaks when he feels it's very necessary.

So he normally just uses ASL and is very close to Davey as a result

But he takes after Jack in his love for the drums

If he's sitting down at home, there's a 80% chance his youngest sister is in his lap

Meadow "Mimi" Kelly-Jacobs

The youngest of the siblings

Davey insisted on naming her after Medda somehow

But since she's young, everyone calls her Mimi to simplify it

She's 3 in the last chapter of EIS

A Jack Kelly carbon copy but with all the David Jacobs sass.

Ergo, the best of both her dads

Loves candy (as any child does)

Loves her siblings but has torn both of their hair at least twice when they ignored her in favour of literally anything else

Ice Skater AU

Maariyah "Maari" Kelly-Jacobs

She was adopted when she was 4

She's Punjabi (because I have to project SOMEWHERE)

Oldest by just a few months

Jack teaches all their kids to ice skate and she loves it so much, she decides to persue it as her career

just like dad

Wins her first competiton at 11 and Jack is a blubbering mess over her. She has a screenshot of it as Jack's picture on her phone.

She's a lesbian and meets her future wife at a rink while they're both just practising

Isaac Kelly Jacobs

He was 2 when Jack and Davey adopted him

He's African American. Jack immediately clicked with him because Isaac was orphaned when his mom died of cancer, the same as Jack.

He is normally the target of his siblings' pranks

When he becomes an astronaut, he often jokes in interviews that it was just to get as far as physically possible from them

He's the same age as Maari, just younger by a few months

He is pansexual and meets his partner in high school physics but they don't get together till they meet again years later

Sky Kelly Jacobs

The youngest of the siblings, adopted when they were only a few months old

They were born in Greece and are mixed race

Comes out as non-binary and ace when they're in their last year of middle school

(Jack's reaction to this is screaming "GOTTA CATCH 'EM ALL" and Davey rolls his eyes at that)

They're younger than their siblings by 3 years

They use the fame they get from being in a famous family to become a climate change activist (and dabbles in many other big social movements)

(This entire AU is just so >>>>)

Trans Davey AU

Francis "Frankie" Jacobs (later Kelly-Jacobs)

He was born before Davey starts the proper transition

He clicks with Jack immediately when they finally meet (he's 8)

Frankie is super close with his Aunt Sarah because she practically co-parented him up until he was 1

When Jack and Davey run into financial problems and meet Medda who gives them jobs, he becomes the "theatre's little nuisance (affectionate)"

Between the people at the theatre, Davey's family and all their friends, he is the apple of everyone's eyes

[sarahsinwonderland]

would you lie with me and just forget the world // carly sloan

Carly had been sitting in her dorm room when she got the call. The call that stopped her world. Her father’s voice on the line, along with people screaming all around him. She only had to hear ‘Marcus’ and ‘injured’ before she was standing up and grabbing everything within arms reach to throw into her duffel. Her roommate had turned to look at her and the way Carly looked must have been enough for Cecilia to be scared. ‘Bug, you need to come home.’ As if she would have stayed while her best friend, the only person other than Shawn who knew her better than anyone, was hurt. She said ‘I love you’s’ before she threw her keys at Cece. 

“I need you to drive to the airport. Please. Take my car, use it, I just...” She couldn’t break. Marcus. Think of Marcus. Cece nodded and as soon as they both had shoes on, Carly grabbed her bag and they left. Her dad sent her the ticket he had bought her and by the time she hit TSA, she had 20 minutes til boarding. When she was sitting alone in the bursting terminal, that’s when she called Lexie.

“Mommy...mommy how bad?”

“It’s bad. Callie and Link are working on him now.”

Carly forced most of the tears away, wiping the few stray ones that had fallen. “C-can you tell Shawn to pick me up? We’re leaving in 30 minutes.”

After hanging up with her mom and boarding the plane, she had found her seat, the first class window seat, right near the front of the plane. Her bag stuffed underneath the seat in front of her and her head back, hands rested on her stomach as she reminded herself to breathe. 

Until she heard it.

Next to her, the man was watching ESPN, in particular, a recap from the game came on and showed a replay of the game. Carly knew she shouldn’t have looked. But she did.

And she immediately grabbed the air sick bag from the seat back pocket and got sick. 

Not from the image or some weird unexplained phantom pain, but from the sureness that her best friend would likely never make it pro like he had dreamed of for years. From knowing that her best friend would wake up, in pain and mad.

But he sure as hell wouldn’t be alone. An hour later and she was bolting from her seat, bypassing everything and walking out of the airport to the arrivals, seeing her twin standing by his car. A deep breath and a moment to steady herself and before she could say a word, his arms were around her. 

“Let’s go.” She nodded into his shoulder and got into the car, putting on her seatbelt and stuffing the bag under her feet. Her brother drove well over the speed limit, getting them there in an astonishing 7 minutes, less than half the time it should have taken them. But before she knew it, she was running, actually sprinting, through the hospital to get to the place she knew they would be. 

The first one she saw was Nico and he immediately wrapped her in his arms. Her breath was coming out in pants but her arms wrapped tightly around him. She had grown up around them. Nico and Levi were the closest she got to a second set of parents aside from Meredith and Derek. She tightened her hold, pressing her face into the shoulder of his sweatshirt and finally letting go. 

She had held it in for so long, the fear, the pain, the...the agony. She let it all go now, her sobs coming harder and faster. Soon Levi had joined his husband and she was being held by her best friend’s parents, soothed and comforted.

Hours later, she was curled in the corner, her iPad in her lap and the Apple pencil in hand as she journaled every feeling in an attempt to not to think about looking up the video or the news or anything. Nico had turned the TV’s to some kid’s channel and she had spent the first 30 minutes watching some show about cartoon dogs with Australian accents. It was oddly calming. 

When Link and Callie came out, she stood, wringing her hands and standing a distance away before Levi waved her over and wrapped his arm around her shoulders. When they were shown to his room, Carly held back her gasp. Her best friend. He looked...he looked nothing like her Marcus. This Marcus was still and silent. Her ray of sunshine was never still. She joked that he would just burst if made to sit still. 

But still she moved to the side with his good arm and sat in the chair, knees pulled up to her chest and grabbed his hand. 

She didn’t move. She was like that when he woke up. Just sitting beside him, asleep with her head against her knees and his hand in her own. 

[positivelyruined]

Thank you for the tag, Lady M! @goforth-ladymidnight

Here are my answers!

What should we call you?

You can call me CeCe. 🫶

How long have you been a Tamlin fan?

I’m a latecomer to Pro-Tamlin. I found this group in early March of 2024. My journey with Tam started by reading ACOTAR during the Christmas holidays and just finding a lot of comfort in it — despite that it wasn’t the caliber or style of novel I typically love. I got the spoilers for what happened to Tamlin and was pretty devastated and left floating in a haze until I found some like minded people on Tumblr.

What drew you to Tamlin?

I love a blonde love interest — I do. I am not a tall, dark, and handsome girly. I have always loved a blonde and Tamlin’s heart for others and introverted, yet passion soul really made me enjoy him in a way I hadn’t enjoyed a MMC in a while.

Do you have a favourite headcanon for our Spring Lord?

Tamlin played (and sent!) the music Feyre heard Under the Mountain, and I will die on that hill. This is the same as @goforth-ladymidnight but 100%.

I have a lot of headcanon that I work with, seeing as I stopped reading after the first book; but some of my favorites are just in the little things that bring him happiness.

For me, it’s that he loves ducks. L-O-V-E-S Ducks. Could spend hours with them, ramble about ducks for hours, always carries blueberries in his pockets for his duck friends. They just make him genuinely happy.

Who’s your favourite pairing (platonic or romantic) with Tamlin?

I’m not super out there when it comes to pairings. I’ll fiddle with things on occasion, but most the time I like things to be gentle on my brain and good for the heart. I always want to add positivity wherever I can.

Tamlin x Feyre — obviously, this is my favorite. I’m the second most featured poster in the Feylin tag fairly often, apart from @bookishfeylin. I just love their dynamic and honestly, their messes. Both of them are very broken people in book one and we (readers) never got to see them heal together. I think the protectiveness they have over one another is very special. Having someone go under the mountain for you to face your demons and fight your battles is not an everyday experience. People say that Feyre never loved Tamlin, but she died for him. She killed for him. The only thing she never got to do was live with him.

Lucien x Tamlin. I love these two. Honestly, they are one of my first M x M pairings. Their friendship and devotion to each other being the foundation of ‘something more’ is a sweet idea and I know that no matter who each of them ended up with, a part of each of their hearts would be who they are because of each other.

Tamlin x Nesta. I just have a vibe here. I feel like there is plenty they could bond over and Tamlin would actually help Nesta feel incredibly understood. Meanwhile, Nesta would be a ride or die, much like Lucien.

Briar x Tamlin. This is a barely there ship for me. I mostly (for now) write it for @booksnwriting because it makes me happy when I get these messages just saying, “SQUEEEEE.” It’s fun to be able to see things from someone else’s eyes sometimes and it’s a good growth exercise as a writer. I find them interesting and when written the right way, I think it could be a compelling story. Do I trust SJM to do that at this point? Unfortunately, no.

Have you named Tamlin’s family? What are their names? (Give us your headcanons too!)

Absolutely!

See below:

Tamlin's mother: Adeline. I’ve used this name before for my MMC Mother, once, but I think I must be attached to it as the name of a soft, artistic mother who is loving and dedicated to her son.

Tamlin's father: Casimir. I wanted to give him a name that was like an elegant sneer, a bit of a Lucius Malfoy effect. So, Casimir Hawthorne.

Tamlin's brothers: Teagan and Aldor. In my canon, they are actually his step brothers and had a different mother. I picture some of their hatred of him coming from the fact that their mother was ousted from court (and shortly died a mysterious death) when Casimir found his mate in Adeline.

If you were transported into the Spring Court right now, what would be your role? (Sentry, Gardener, etc.)

I’d like to hope I could have enough space just to heal my body and PTSD. I think Tamlin would understand that. The world needs more gardens, so perhaps I would work with his roses.

While we wait for Tamlin week, do you have any fic recommendations?

Yes — of course, I’m trying to get better at participating in other’s fic and leave them the same top tier comments and encouragement which they’ve been so kind to give me.

I would probably suggest The Tragedy of Spring (Feylin) by @sad-scarred-sassy and Bloom (Neslin) by @praetorqueenreyna

There are many talented people in this fandom and I’m so glad they all follow their hearts. You really can't go wrong when doing that. Much love to all! 🫶

In the coming months, weeks and days leading up to Tamlin Week, we'll be dropping some fun community activities. Feel free to participate as much or as little as you like!

Now that we've got the prompts out of the way, it's time to get to the heart of Tamlin Week. Everyone knows our High Lord Tamlin, and you’ve met our mods, but it’s time to meet you!

Introduce yourself through the questions below, and if you know someone who’d like to participate in Tamlin week, feel free to tag them.

What should we call you? How long have you been a Tamlin fan? What drew you to Tamlin? Do you have a favourite headcanon for our Spring Lord? Who’s your favourite pairing (platonic or romantic) with Tamlin? Have you named Tamlin’s family? What are their names? (Give us your headcanons too!) If you were transported into the Spring Court right now, what would be your role? (Sentry, Gardener, etc.) While we wait for Tamlin week, do you have any fic recommendations?

Tags: (add your friends here!)

We encourage you to check the notes to say hi to old friends, and welcome new names to our community!

[tcpimpabutterfly]

SOFTER PROMPTS

Status: Accepting

@themercifulmother said: ♛ for my muse to teach yours something new // delores...teaching travis how to feed + hold baby melissa?

             Was it bad for him to say that he didn’t want to learn how to feed her? Not because he didn’t want anything to do with his daughter or be involved in pivotal moments like these, but because he was scared. Not nervous like he had been plenty of times in his life when he found himself in uncomfortable settings that made him want to crawl out of his skin and burrow somewhere until he was alone, but truly scared for once. There was always the looming threat of something going wrong with anything he did but those statistics heightened when it came to the week-old infant placed in his arms. One wrong angle of his arms and Melissa could be choking on the formula without him even knowing! It was all so stressful and he was going crazy on the inside, but he did his best to remain calm as he allowed Delores to adjust his arms to a position that would be both safe and comfortable for the baby. He might’ve appeared as calm as he possibly could on the outside to a point where it was convincing Delores, but one tiny croak out of Melissa sent his heart racing and arms shaking. It most likely wasn’t much but a tiny baby burp, but it still lit up the nerves inside him that were already on fire. With Delores’s gentle instructions and words of encouragement he was able to get the top of the bottle pass her lips with ease. “Am I doing it right?”

[dreamwritesimagines]

I have been thinking about the Pro Athlete AU for hours now and I'm so obsessed omfg like imagine if one of the boys got hurt during the game? The angst the drama ooooooh 😱 Also the paparazzi following them around 🤩

Can we get a glimpse of how Celias is in that AU?? Because we saw Anthony is very confident and I'm wondering if Elias is a mess or smooth near Cece

Omg omg LOVEEEE ❤❤

Thank you so much for this❤ I'm so happy to hear that you liked it, it's such a fun AU❤

We can definitely get a glimpse of Celias in that AU❤😂

I think Elias would definitely be a mess near Cece😂 Like, when he first saw her he probably stopped and told Anthony she was so pretty and that he would ask her out, and Anthony just rolled his eyes😂 But like, I think it took him some time to gather up his courage and after a meeting he went like,

"Cecily, can I have a moment with you?"

"Of course."

"So um- so I was wondering, if you..."

"Are you alright?"

"Yes! Yes, I just wanted to ask you, there's this new bar called The Ale, maybe you've heard it before?"

"Yeah it just opened. Do you want me to make a reservation? That's usually your assistant's job but-"

"No no! Not a reservation, I was wondering if you wanted to see it?"

"Sure, who else is coming?"

"Just me. And you I mean. If you'd like."

"....Like a date?"

"Yeah. Yeah a date but no pressure, as I said, if you- if you'd like to go on a date with me."

[infinitebells]

annoying: chapter 18

iwaizumi hajime has hated you, his assistant athletic trainer, since he knew you in high school. you on the other hand have bothered him for fun for as long as you knew him, not realizing your romantic feelings for him had manifested in that way. what happens when you two blockheads finally come to terms with how you feel?

— — —

you were buzzing with excitement as you watched kageyama send that one quick set that him and hinata had been refining for years to the orange haired spiker, and the stadium erupted into a cacophony of cheers as japan won the third and final set 28-26. atsumu, who on the sidelines with you, jumped up screaming, grabbing your hand and rushing you both onto the court to meet bokuto and yaku halfway. the four of you embraced in a group hug, you only being faintly aware of the sweat dripping down the boys bodies.

“WE DID IT!!” bokuto’s ecstatic shouts filled your ears, and he separated from the other two boys to wrap you in an even bigger hug, lifting you halfway off the ground. you could hear the telltale sign of cameras flashing around the two of you, but you really couldn’t care at the moment.

“i’m so proud of you kou,” you murmur in his ear. he sets you down with a huge smile on his face.

“oi,” a deep voice grabs your attention, and you turn to see suna standing with his hands tucked into his shorts. he stands there expectantly, and you shuffle over to stand in front of him, hand reaching up to pat his head gently. he smiles softly before taking his hands out of his pants to give you a short, tight hug.

“you did well sunarin,” you mumble, and he squeezes your sides at the comment before leaning back and smiling at him. neither of you notice the way iwaizumi stares unabashedly at you from the sidelines.

“oi assholes! we gotta line up!” yaku yells, and you give them all smiles again before heading back to the sidelines to watch them line up and bow to the opposing team before shaking hands with them. you refuse to acknowledge the athletic trainer only a few feet from you. you simply turn away and start to clean up some of the larger items on the benches before grabbing your own bag. by the time you’ve finished, the boys are having their post-game talk with coach. you can feel iwaizumi’s eyes on you as you continue to watch them talk about the game.

“y/n-chan!!” your ears perk up at the sound of the familiar voice you’d grown to love in high school. you turn to the side to see oikawa tooru in the flesh walking your way, arms crossed over his broad chest with that cheeky smile of his.

“oikawa,” you say smugly, turning your nose up to shoot him what you hope is a snide grin. neither of you can be petty for long before his arms open up and he welcomes you into a warm, inviting hug. his head rests on top of yours and you bask in the nostalgia hugging him brings.

“i missed you y/n,” he says, and you giggle before detaching.

“i think that’s just because i was a good kisser,” you say, and he sputters indignantly.

“well yes but that’s not why!” his face flushes, and you laugh out loud at his reaction.

“i know, i’m just teasing! i missed you too ‘kawa,” you say, tilting your head and closing your eyes as you smile. when you open then, he’s grinning widely.

“are we still good for tonight?” he asks, and you nod excitedly.

“yup! i’ll meet you outside the stadium after you’re showered and dressed ok?” he nods with a smile in respond before offering a quick goodbye and wave. as you go back to the bench, you see iwaizumi sitting with a clenched jaw and white knuckles. you pray that he doesn’t notice you as you move behind him to grab your water bottle, but of course, life isn’t that kind.

“what were you and shittykawa talking about?” he grits out. you can feel the annoyance radiating off of him, and it almost scares you how palpable the tension is between you two.

“nothing that concerns you,” you say sharply, choosing to swallow your obvious discomfort and sit a few feet away from him on the bench. neither of you look at each other. it’s vaguely familiar.

“well you’re my coworker and he’s my best friend so excuse me for asking,” he says, finally turning to look at you. your patience wears thin, and you can’t stop yourself from snapping.

“yeah well neither of those facts gives you any right to know about what goes on in my personal life,” you say. his eyes widen, and he does nothing but stare as you stand up and walk away from him.

“hey coach, i’m going to step outside for a bit, it’s a bit crowded in here,” you say, and your coach nods and watches as you walk out to the back of the stadium, behind the locker rooms and showers.

by the time you’re outside, it’s nighttime and the warm, tokyo breeze blows your hair softly. the atmosphere brings you back to your senior year of high school.

— — —

“tooru-kun! wait for me!” you yell through the open field, and oikawa only turns back to shoot you a breathtaking smile before stopping in the middle of the soccer field, blanket and backpack in hand. the moon shines brightly above you two, illuminating the grass for just the two of you.

“so slow y/n-chan,” he tsks, and he laughs as you catch up and flick his forehead.

“not everyone is a pro high school volleyball player you know,” you say, plopping down onto the blanket laid out for the both of you. he sits down next to you, pulling your body to his so that you’re sat in between his legs. one of his arms is set behind him for balance while the other wraps gently around your waist.

“and soon you’ll be a professional argentinian player,” you whisper. he hears you all the same. you can feel the lump in your throat growing against your will, and you know damn well he noticed the shift in mood. he’s silent for a moment, choosing to kiss your temple before speaking.

“i’m sorry darling,” he murmurs, and you shake your head, forcing your tears down as you turn in his grasp so you’re seated on his lap and facing him. your hands hold his cheeks gently, and you smile sadly.

“don’t apologize for chasing your dreams tooru. if i was in your position i know you’d support me all the same. i’m happy you’re able to do what you love,” you say sincerely. his watery smile is unconvincing, but he leans forward and pecks your lips all the same.

“have i told you i love you?” he asks, leaning back so he’s laying down with you two pressed chest to chest.

“i think so.” you grin, and he grins back.

“i won’t stop loving you, even if we fall out of love, i’ll always love you.”

— — —

you don’t remember when you shifted to the front of the stadium, watching swarms of fans exit the stadium and head towards the metro station. you lean back on the bench, eyes staring up at the various stars dotting the sky. the moon is almost full tonight, and even if it’s imperfect, it’s still beautiful.

“your head still in the clouds y/n-chan?” you sit up to see oikawa squatting in front of you, glasses perched atop his messy brown locks. his eyes are warm with joy, and his smile is genuine. it’s been a long time since you’ve seen him smile like that.

“it’s always been there,” you reply, and he giggles before standing up to his full height and offering you a hand.

“shall we go?”

“but of course good sir.”

— — —

masterlist

taglist: @babyoomi @honeysunny @halesandy @autumnandhotchocolate @velociraptorenthusiast @fluffyviciousbunny @darlingkuroo @youtuboo @b0bablinds @nerdynstoned @jovialweaselskeletonfan @amboisez @bbyhaji @astral-vroom @miwtze @seijqhigh @mrswhitethornbelikov @atsumubabie @lvrkuroo @navymacaroons @daphnxy @mangobangi @galagcica @its-the-aerieljeane @the-golden-jhope @cece-lives-here @kellesvt @nachotrash @jewlmin @anngelllla @poppi144 @trashy-simp @ysatrap @hogwarts--imagines @mariachiii @thestarsanctuary @indecisivehusky @bakugouswh0r3 @erinoikawa @freyafolkvangr @tetrapot-melon-tea @meiankolia @sya-arts-blog @d0llpie @rintarawr @winunk @roschea-behindthescreens @roselleviennesstuff @chaichai-the-weeb @lady-tokugawa-of-mikawa

[hitoshisbabygirl]

WHEWWWW CHILEEE 🥵😳👀

After a certain conversation I saw from the lovely @mythiccheroacademia about a bass voice induced/hood(ish) Tamaki I HAD to write this idea. I feel like he’s still be shy but let the right one say down outta pocket shiii...the black force energy is ACTIVATED and he’s not backing down from a fight 😌

So I write this up , I hope it’s okay sskksndkdn it’s really my first official black!reader with a character 🥺 (also me admitting how much I love Cece and her works with this here 👉🏾👈🏾)

Paring(s) : Tamaki Amajiki x Black!reader

Word count: roughly 2.4K

Warnings ; LANGUAGE LANGUAGE LANGUAGE. Just some explicit language of tama telling off hoes ✨ jealous and hot under the collar tamaki of sorts 😌 yes tamaki is older, they’d both graduated and currently in a pro hero company

Don’t play with me// T. Amajiki

It was just a day out with your loving boyfriend Tamaki. The two of you had been dating for a while. Now in the summer of no classes and no extra hero work to do , the two of you decided to do way more together; dates, game nights, other festivities you name it the shy boy went along with it. To the surprise of you both, your two cousins and big brother decided to have a surprise trip to Japan to see you, and to meet the man who stole your heart. They were rough around the edges, tattoos as far as the eyes could see, but to you, they were who you grew up with, the fun and adrenaline filled things y’all did made up your childhood and life until you transferred to U.A wanting to strengthen your own quirk and be a hero , plus you always wanted to visit japan, you being prepared already, almost outstanding in your Japanese, and loving the culture you could experience first hand there.

And that’s where you met a very shy but handsome Tamaki Amajiki. Surprising most around him the two of you hit it off, understanding eachother and quietly talking to yourselves about whatever topic that came up. It was evident to his friends, especially his best friend Mirio that he had fallen for the exchange student from across seas, who stole his heart and made him more confident. Getting that confidence boost made him ask you out, and now you two were a happy couple of 2 years, going on to a lifetime.

Which brings us to the current time, it too you at least a half hour for him to come from your shared room to meet his other family to be. After the first tedious round of talking , the boys were getting along, Tamaki trying (and failing) to fit in with your more aggressive brother. Sighing you called out to them “Aye, I’m gonna get some food, want anything?” With calls of ‘nah’ and full meals you sighed, taking down who wanted what and leaving . They planned to be here a week or two, and that alone wasn’t bad. They just could be...hot under the collar and with them having explosive quirks, you didn’t want a fight breaking out from someone looking at their “little sister” wrong.

The weeks went by too fast, the five of you having a lot of fun together, exploring and just catching up on what you missed back home. Giving you a hug each of them told you how much they loved you and would be back while you were still on break. Giving your brother a suspicious look he laughed “ Don’t worry , mama’s coming up too, she misses her baby” he said as you laughed “ I was just curious on how you got the money to keep coming back and forth here to see me” “I got that promotion at the construction company, more money, and way better hours” he laughed as you gave him a bigger hug “and you’re just now telling me as you leave, you ass” giving you one last look he smiled, throwing a hand up at your usually timid boyfriend “I’ll see you later G ight? Don’t forget what we talked about and what we taught you yeah?” He said as Tamaki did the same back , giving a surprising “I got it” back to him as they walked down the driveway to their cab. “What did he tell you?” You questioned as he gave you a uncharacteristic smirk, kissing your forehead “don’t worry about it sweetheart”

As the next few vists happened throughout the year you realize tamaki was becoming more and more like your brother, less timid and more dominant over conversations, but your soft and loving tamaki never left, if anything it got stronger. He took you out to the mall to shop, wanted to do more outside dates and loved picking out cute outfits with you. He enjoyed the ink adorning your skin even more than he did when he first saw it, asking for you to help him pick out something for him eventually. “Okay who are you and what did you do with tamaki?” You questioned one day when he came home, giving you your usual kiss as he came in the door. Except it was nothing like you had before, he put his hand under your chin and tilted you until you were in your tippy toes to keep the kiss as deep as he started, his other hand dangerously low on your back as he gave your ass a squeeze, chuckling as you gasped, pulling away with a smug look “Hey doll what’s up? How’s your day been?” He asked as he slid past you, Ignoring the shocked look on your face “Tamaki how are you feeling? Are you alight you’ve never been this..forward” tilting his head he came over to where you were , standing in your shared kitchen with your bottom lip in your mouth. Grinning he pulled it from your teeth, giving you another peck “You shouldn’t be teasing your bottom lip, that’s for me to do” he whispered as you gasped, burying you face into his wide chest. “Nothings wrong with me sweetheart, I just..realized how valuable you are to me. You’ve always been but...I know to what level of a queen I have as my girlfriend yknow?” The iconic shy Tamaki made an appearance , making you look up to him. He was shy but he was confident behind what he was saying. “It’s not a bad thing..I like it” you admitted as you traced his cheek “Good, Heyo don’t think I’ll be changing again”

This year for a piece of your summer break you and Tamil decided to go visit back to the states, the two of you loving and hating the heat wave that hit you coming off of the plane. Once again you were with your brother and only one of your cousins this time, visiting your mom and having family cookouts. Planning to stay a month you two had some time to spend together and with your family. Your nieces and nephews loved Tamaki, the fact he could make his limbs into what he ate made them love to try and have him pick them up with his tentacles the most. Your mom loved him and everyone had accepted him as your husband to be.

On one of the hottest days y’all experienced there, you decided to wear one of the cutest outfits you had bought, a two piece ; a crop top and a mini skirt. Both pieces black with blue butterflies over them. As you sat in the living room waiting for your boyfriend you heard footsteps from upstairs, being greeted with a sight you wish to burn on your eyelids. A tank top , the infamous, grey Nike joggers and black forces. A whole meal stood in front of you. Holding in a gasp and a subconscious lip but you cleared your throat, giving him a reassuring smile “well look at you, you really are turning into my brother” you joked as he gave you a shy smile “ I wanted to wear something I’m not used to..I hate things clinging to me..unless it’s you of course “ he teased back as you wrapped your arms around his torso, standing on your tiptoes as you gave his cheek a kiss “you look good..really good..I might have to fight the girls around the block if they look at you wrong.” You warned as he smirked, wrapping a large arm around your shoulder “don’t worry they have nothing on you baby..”

Heading out to get some lunch you fanned yourself with your hand, the heat really getting to you as you stood in line. Tamaki when you get drinks, promising to meet you back at the circle so you two could heard to the nearby shopping plaza, wanting to get some more things before going to get some games to play later with your family members who planned to come and hangout before one of their games came on that night. You and Tamaki were planning to just be upstairs and watching your own movie by then.

Hearing someone clear their throat you valves over to see a shorter, chocolate man staring at you, a wide grin on his face as he licked his lips “whatsup baby how are you today?” Knowing how this was gonna turn out you gave him a polite smile and a quick “I’m fine” before going to look around to see if you saw that familiar tuff of indigo walking around “Soo..what's a fine ass girl like you doing in this heat alone? You’re [. ]’s sister right?” He continued as you shook your head yes, not giving him a thought as you stared at your phone “You aint gotta be shy , your brother knows me. I’ve always saw you and that ass wander around when you used to be here, now you moved away to some other country what was it again? China ? That Asian land aint meant for a sista like you, they don’t even got enough to please you with unlike me” sighing you started to correct him “I live in Japan for one, two I have a boyfriend and three don’t you still have something unresolved with that one girl? Ion need nothing from no one that isn’t my boyfriend thanks” You snapped back as he laughed, comfortably putting an arm on your shoulders “Oh who ol’ girl Ki? Nah I ain’t messing with her and what , you got you a little Japanese man , what is he and his short ass gon do yo me huh? Don’t think that you having one of those short Kung Fu doing ass gon do anything to a real man now baby, you’ve been eating too much rice huh?”

Before you could open your mouth you felt an arm wrap around your waist and move in front of you. Now staring at the strong back of your boyfriend you went to stop him before your mouth dropped open “And who said ya ass could keep talking to her huh?” Without a stutter in sight Tamaki snapped back to the slightly shorter and smaller male “ And who the hell are you?” “The same man you wanna talk about being a short ass Asian” with a look of interest you watched your boyfriend stand up for you “Ooohhh I get it , you think you can just step up to anyone and they not be scared of you huh? Mann you aint in Japan anymore boy , you ain’t gon do shit” the guy barked back, making Tamkai raise an eyebrow and laugh, looking him up and down before squatting down some to match the arguing guys height “At least I can reach my girlfriend, even she can look down at you” which a few ‘oohs’ and ‘damns’ coming from the bystanders the boy gave him a snarl as he tried to come for Tamaki again “she wants some real dick not some little pepper in her walls” and with that Tamaki gave him a even harder laugh, walking until they were too close for your comfort, before you could stop him he gave his last and seemingly damaging blow “But I wonder who’s dick she’s bouncing on and screaming for more from hm? Oh trust me I know how to dick her down and then some”

With his words he reached over and pulled you to his hip by your ass, making the boy give up with a huff , walking away as the others around him boo’d and made fun of him, praising Tamaki as he gave his own satisfied smirk, dapping up some of the guys who came up to him.

Pulling you from the line he left his hand at your hips as your jaw still was open “Where in the hell did you learn that?? Damnit [. ] he must’ve taught you” you huffed as he looked you over , licking his lips as he kissed your cheek. “Mhn..your brother said defend what you love so..I simply did that. He had no business thinking he could step to my girl and hit on her from thinking he was good enough to talk to a queen, my queen at that. Shit ain’t sweet but I respect myself and you too much to fight some low life” he finished as you bit your lip, liking this side of him “Well shit...aren’t you the man Tamaki?” He laughed as he kissed you, biting where you were tugging on your bottom lip to make you let out a squeal. Pulling away he gave a lopsided smile “I’ma keep true to what I said too, when we get home I’m making sure you know I meant what I just said back there, no one tries to take what’s mine, especially with mediocre ass attempts with dick” he growled as you stuttered giving him a wide eyed look. Maybe tamaki was less of the baby you’ve come to see him as. Once you got home, Tamaki made sure you knew how much he loved you, making true on the words he threw to that guys he got into it earlier

[oofadrian]

I saw [ADRIAN PRINCE] at a coffee shop in [BROOKLYN] today. I forgot how much [HE] looks like [RAYMOND ABLACK]. They are a [THIRTY TWO] year old [A PROFESSOR] who’s been in NYC for [THIRTY YEARS] now. Every time we run into each other, they are always [ADVENTUROUS + DOWN TO EARTH] but I’ve heard people say they can also be [STUBBORN + ASOCIAL]. [HIGH HOPES BY PANIC! AT THE DISCO] reminds me of them every time it comes on the radio. — [era, she+her, 26, est]

hEY its era. . . i am back. i had a blake lively and rege fc. life sucked, but tay joined and here i AM AGAIN with a hunky man

born in india but when he was two his parents moved to nyc for a better life, they owned their own spice store and restaurant.

both were adrian’s playground, jumping and playing, running around the cooks, waiters and employees

he wasn’t the best at school but worked his tail off, knowing his parents moved here for him and to get the education he might not have gotten in india 

as he grew the social butterfly became a lover of quality instead of quantity for friends. joined the baseball team and enjoyed every moment he had with it

ended up at nyu with a baseball scholarship. he was a little lost with himself, feeling of that he didn’t . . . belong because he didn’t know what he wanted to do 

he tried everything, changing his major literally . . . every week or so

finally  archaeology and history called to him, and he got a double major

and now he has a PhD in both, specializing in the history of great britian

he now teaches at colombia 

he’s an avid semi pro baseball player and bodyguard

cece only needs him basically when she goes out to special functions or when she calls on him so he’s a man that just loves having his hands in just about everything 

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Green Growth

In 1972, the Club of Rome published "Limits to Growth," which used pretty straightforward modeling to predict that the world's productive capacity would be exhausted soon.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Limits_to_Growth

But over the years, the limits in Limits to Growth have proven to be more complicated. Capitalists have many failings, but one thing that they can be relied upon to do, wherever possible, is reduce the costs that they incur.

Oftentimes, cost reductions can be realized by externalizing: polluting, overseas dumping, exploiting labor. Sometimes, cost reductions come from reducing quality or quantity while holding prices steady.

Our electronics are cheaper because they're made by companies in China whose labor practices drive employees to suicide. When they were made by unionized labor onshore, they cost more.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Foxconn_suicides

For years, the late, lamented Consumerist blog documented the "Grocery Shrink Ray" whereby common packaged goods got smaller while their prices held steady.

https://consumerist.com/tag/shrink-ray/index.html

Meanwhile, the private equity fuckwits who took over J Crew destroyed its staples like the Cece ballet flat, replacing the stitching with glue and substituting inferior materials - increasing profits by cutting costs without cutting prices.

https://www.npr.org/transcripts/861378110

But capitalists also realize savings by redesigning products so that they they use less labor, energy and materials. Compare a stone house to a modern efficient home: the labor, energy and material inputs per cubic meter have been in freefall for generations.

It's not because capitalists are environmentalists, it's because they're cheap. I love this study of Ikea catalogs that found that the SKUs that endure become more materially efficient over time:

https://www.frbsf.org/economic-research/files/BaxterLandry.pdf

The Billy bookcase you bought this year is visually and functionally equivalent to the ones I assembled at a bookstore in 1991, but they're lighter (less material), pack smaller (eking out improvements in the knapsack problem), and are composed of parts from fewer suppliers.

The same is true of cars, clothes, and other categories of goods. Capitalism doesn't care how it reduces costs (material, energy and labor are the major costs), and it uses a mix of benign and harmful techniques to achieve these reductions.

All of this leads capitalism's true believers to conclude that capitalism is compatible with planetary survival: left to its own devices, capitalist's cheapness will reduce material and energy inputs, and the carbon footprint of our goods will fall even as our economy grows.

One such believer is MIT Sloan's Andrew McAfee's "More From Less: The Surprising Story of How We Learned to Prosper Using Fewer Resources—and What Happens Next."

https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/More-from-Less/Andrew-McAfee/9781982103576

McAfee's critics say he has it wrong. As Nafeez Ahmed writes in Motherboard, "scientific analysis by a group of systems scientists and economists who have advised the United Nations seems to pull the rug out from under this entire enterprise."

The critique is "Raising the bar: on the type, size and timeline of a 'successful' decoupling," published in Environmental Politics.

https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/09644016.2020.1783951?journalCode=fenp20&

(Here's the Sci-Hub mirror:)

https://sci-hub.tw/downloads/2020-06-25//95/10.1080@09644016.2020.1783951.pdf

The authors say McAfee cherry-picks his stats, missing instances in which the growth that seems to happen without increased consumption is actually just externalizing - consuming resources somewhere else, off the manufacturer's books (but still on Earth's ecological ledger).

They also say that McAfee fails to acknowledge that even where there's growth without increased consumption, that there's a Red Queen's Race: when things get cheaper (because of increased material/energy efficiency), we buy more of it.

This is a familiar pattern: making it easier to travel increases traffic, which erases the gains from the new travel method. Uber and Lyft first increased mobility in cities, then they paralyzed them:

https://www.sfgate.com/technology/article/Uber-Lyft-San-Francisco-pros-cons-ride-hailing-13841277.php

It's why traffic speeds in London today are barely faster than they were in the pre-internal combustion era.

https://www.forbes.com/2008/04/21/europe-commute-congestion-forbeslife-cx_po_0421congestion.html

The critique of "uncoupled" growth is correct, but incomplete.

It's easy to imagine a city that uses internal combustion for mass transit but not private cars - and massively increases landspeed relative to horses.

The barrier to such a city isn't tech or economics: it's ideology. No one came down off a mountain with two stone tablets saying "Thou shalt own a personal automobile." Rather, car companies  corrupted urban planning to reduce transit and make us reliant on cars.

Likewise, it's possible to imagine an economic system in which manufacturing relentlessly reduces material/energy inputs while banning externalizing (cheating) and limiting new consumption.

Leigh Phillip's "Austerity Ecology & the Collapse-Porn Addicts" describes this in detail. It's a call for a Promethean Left that demands technology to sustain the planet while giving peasants the lives of lords, not reducing lords to peasants.

https://boingboing.net/2016/01/12/keep-your-scythe-the-real-gre.html

If we can reform our ideology to prevent capitalism from wrecking the planet, why stop there? Why not harness technology to give us better allocations that enable plenty without waste?

https://locusmag.com/2017/03/cory-doctorow-the-jubilee-fill-your-boots/

[inspirationdivine]

Where the Heart is || Jared & Lydia

Timing: Before Mushroom Jared  Parties: @themidnightfarmer  & @inspirationdivine Summary: After Lydia’s injuries, Jared comes to check up on his friend, and learns a secret Trigger Warnings: Brief reference to domestic abuse, head trauma

Cap was covered with a blanket for the walk, Jared holding the Raiju under his arm until they were right up to Lydia's door and waiting for her to answer. Cap sat patiently on Jared’s feet as they both waited. Maybe Lydia didn’t want the extra help, but it was harder to deny it if it was already looking at you in the face with its adorable little face. Or at least this is what the nymph had told himself. And even if Lydia still denied Cap to stay with her, it was good for the creature to leave the farm now and again. Especially on more calm errands than the trip they’d taken to the ring last time. As soon as the door opened Jared smiled holding out a small basket of flowers. None of the blooms were typical for a bouquet, but rather they were usually sold to the magic shops and at the market for ingredients for things. But it was the best the nymph could do, he was -as always- strapped for cash. 

After Cece had left, Lydia had collapsed into her new couch, a futon that she could comfortably drape herself over without putting any weight on her wings. She wore a camisole with a low back to put as little pressure on anywhere as possible, and despite the entire White Crest anti bra brigade picking a fight with her, Lydia was in fact not wearing one at the moment. Her points about support and structure still stood all the same. She’d set aside her phone for the while being, lying in empty silence as she tried to ignore the call of distant mushrooms and the pain rocketing through her body. Her phone beeped as her doorbell let her know someone was looking to come in. Lydia looked at the camera image, and groaned softly, before speaking into the mic. “Door’s unlocked, you can come in.” 

Jared held out the basket in front of him the entire time he was entering the house, looking around each corner tentatively until he found who he was looking for. “Hey.” He greeted her politely, nudging Cap to sit patiently just out of her sight to be on the safe side just in case she really truly was upset at him for not taking her answer seriously. Not realizing she’d maybe had a camera system to see who was waiting at the door and had likely seen him already. He set the basket of odd flowers on a side table and tried not to be too obviously nosey and trying to figure out what had happened to his new fae friend. “How are you feeling?”

Lydia slowly shifted, enough to roll to face him a little, still staying mostly lying on the bed. With no glamour on and no desire to put one on, it was impossibly easy for him to see the pallor to her skin, the heavy bruising and swelling along the side of her face. One ankle in a cast and heavy bandage around her back. If he counted her wings - well. Lydia tried not to think about that. “Hey,” she said hoarsely. “Did I… misunderstand something? I didn’t know I was expecting anyone tonight.”  She didn’t answer his question, because her throat closed up the moment she tried to. 

He politely held back a sharp intake of breath at her condition. Even if Jared was very advanced at glamour, it didn’t help mask the expression on his face. He was at war with asking and simply looking. He wanted to know what had occurred but looking at her he also felt like he could see exactly what the answer would be. “Oh well uh.” he stumbled over his words for a moment before catching his stride. “Maybe I should have called, sorry about that I just wanted to drop off that something to hopefully cheer you up, and when you said you were going home I figured it’d be a good time...I uh….also wanted to maybe drop off someone else as well if you’d let me leave him. I know you said you didn’t want a guard Raiju, but…. surely, it’d help? He’s very good, he won’t bother you.”

Jared was many, many things, but he was never going to be good at poker, Lydia thought as she watched his face shift from surprise to horror. Already, in just seconds of him being here, it was too much to bear. Some fae believed it was better to be dead than to lose a wing, and for a brief moment, as Lydia looked away so she couldn’t see his pity, she agreed with them. What a shameful sign of weakness, to let someone hurt you like that. When it came on top of everything else - Lydia burned with a shame so heavy it physically hurt her chest. All the same, she slowly made herself sit up, or at least sit up enough so that she could lean her side against the couch, gesturing at the chair near her. Still not looking at him. “That’s very kind of you… I’m just, I’m just a little confused sometimes. You can sit. Your Raiju too, if he likes.”

Their minds were worlds apart. Whilst Lydia was dwelling on fae custom, and the reaction he must be having to her situation from that standpoint. Jared was taking a very human outlook; it was the only way he knew how to process the image of what he thought may have happened. And while he was horrified, it was more at the thought that someone would do something like this to such a lovely woman that was catching him up. He’d never seen someone so battered and bruised knowing that they hadn’t picked a fight or gone to do something dangerous. She’d only been at home. She’d been at home and this had happened to her. Jared sat down when she offered and put a hand down past his knees for Cap to run to and settle on his feet looking up at Lydia. “This is Cap……. I think we spoke about him before for a little bit uh…. Thought he might be good company for you?”

After a long moment, Lydia looked back at him with a practiced smile, made lopsided by the bruising and swelling on one side of her face. “Yes, I remember, my dear. Hello, little one,” she said to Cap, looking down at what at first appearance might have been a coyote, especially as Lydia had never seen a coyote either. But when she looked more closely, she saw tiny electric sparks in its fur. His fur. “This is the one that was domesticated, right?” She asked, remembering their conversation about wild things being left wild. “This is very sweet of you, but you don’t have to take care of me. We can just spend time together like normal- “Lydia winced and shut her eyes. “Or as close to normal, anyway.” Which wasn’t close at all.

Jared could sort of tell she was just trying to be polite and told himself as soon as she even remotely hinted that she wanted him gone, he would be. Cap shuddered like a chihuahua at being spoken to, his body shivering as if he was cold, the little electrical pulses in his fur increasing for a moment until the bought had passed. “He was used as a power source for things before I got him. But he’s friendly once he's introduced to someone. He can stun people easily if he needs to, and sometimes a little bit more than that. But he was sick a long time before I got him so he’s not incredibly dangerous…. And I mean I know you’re probably fully capable of taking care of yourself but...I don’t know I’m the dad friend sometimes. Not often. But sometimes. And I worry all the time. We don’t have to talk about it, I'd just really like if you’d let Cap stay. He’ll stay outside. I brought his blanket. I’ll come feed him. He won't be any trouble I pro- I really don’t think he will.”

Ever so tentatively, Lydia lowered her arm, extending her hand for Cap to interact with, like one would a dog, or a cat that would inevitably walk away regardless of what you did. She had to trust that Jared was right, like he had been about the bodenoggles. “It sounds like you’re lucky Jared found you,” Lydia told Cap softly, listening to Jared as she watched the unnerving little creature. She laughed, harshly and cruelly, at his words. “Does it look like I’m capable of taking care after myself?” As quickly as she’d laughed, tears had sprung to her eyelids, which she batted away furiously. “I’m sorry. It’s okay. I’m just- I want to show you so many things about our world. I wanted you to have the best possible introduction to fae life. Not this.”

Jared wiggled his toes under the Raiju when Lydia extended her hand kindly to Cap. The Raiju in response got to his feet and tentatively padded closer to the woman. The creature would always look alarming, his species dictated that, but his movements were always that reminiscent of a shy dog. He’d been tamed in an odd way and despite it being awful in Jared’s eyes, in this instance it might work in his favour. Cap liked having a job to do, something to be done. And while Jared refused to let the creature work on the farm doing anything other than being a companion and maybe herding cockatrice, standing guard with Lydia seemed right there with something he would enjoy. The nymph cringed as she laughed and recoiled a little in shame. He was always saying the wrong thing lately. “This ain’t your fault though, and the situation doesn’t mean you can’t look after yourself, it means that someone came prepared to hurt you. That’s different. And…” he trailed off, what could he say? Nothing that would help likely. She had been attacked; he couldn’t fix that.

It was terrifying, letting it cautiously move closer and closer to her hand. Once, a little spark of lighting ran across the fur of its mouth and Lydia flinched away momentarily, before lowering her hand back down. Was Jared sure Cap would behave once he was gone? He was the nymph of vicious beasts, not her, and Cap was looking more vicious the longer she looked at him. She looked back up to Jared when he cringed, immediately regretting her own response. “Oh, Jared-” She said softly, reaching out for his hand after a moment. Was it different? Did it matter now, when she needed a team of eight security guards just to keep her safe, especially when one was driving her around? When she fell asleep at the most random hours, but terror kept her awake most nights. “You’re so sweet. I wish I’d met you months ago.”

Cap sniffled at Lydia’s hand for a moment, his tongue darting out for a very brief moment before he backed up again to assume his comfortable position on Jared’s feet. He would stay out of her way, and so long as he was introduced to anyone else coming over, he wouldn’t cause them any issue either. He was an intuitive little creature and Jared was sure he could help at least a little. As she reached out to him, he did the same for her, taking her hand eager to offer her his apologies in any way that couldn’t turn into another verbal mistake. “Wish I’d -” he had to stop himself from saying something else insensitive by mistake. He wanted to offer support, and maybe they were just new friends, but he cherished the people he got along with, lately he was trying to do this a lot more than he used to. It was important to him to be compassionate with people just as he was with his kids. Everyone needed to feel safe and he just wished he could provide that. “I was a hermit months ago, literally on migration living with a herd. You’d not have enjoyed that.” he tried to joke lamely, but his tone fell flat. 

“No, maybe not,” Lydia replied with a huff of a laugh, less flat that his joke but still deflated at a sad balloon. “Where did you migrate through?” Now that she had his hand, she was loathe to let go, taking comfort in the presence of his warmth, and how his very presence made her chest ring soothingly as if she was being sung to, a blanket to guard away her icy fears. As Lydia sat there silently, focusing on his presence and warmth, she realised it wasn’t just her fear gnawing at her. Shit. Before Jared had gotten here, Lydia had told Chloe to bring a finished lyric set. Except she couldn’t while Jared was here. The double promise was eating at her. Shit. “Chloe, you can come over.” Almost immediately, the blond woman did, looking pale and exhausted as she handed over some sheets. 

“Followed a kerashag over the border. Just wanted to know more about them mainly.” Although his migration felt like it had been years ago rather than only this past winter. So much had happened since he’d gotten home, but that was how this town had always been. One thing after another to overcome. It was a wonder some families lasted as long as they did in this place. Jared didn’t let go of Lydia’s hand, he didn’t want to break that trust, if she needed him to hold her hand all night he’d stay. He always wanted to be someone his friends could count on. The arrival of someone he didn’t know didn’t even have him breaking that contact unless Lydia pulled away. He motioned to Cap that this person was alright and then looked up with a friendly smile. “Uh hi?” He shifted his eyes to glance at Lydia in question.

“Do you do a migration every year?” Lydia asked mildly, not really understanding what a kerashag was either. It could have been a single animal, a group of animals, a party, a species, anything, really, but she always liked listening to him telling her things, even when she didn’t have the faintest idea. She didn’t let go of him when Chloe arrived, but she did tense a little. He was the nymph of vicious beasts, surely, he’d understand. “This is Chloe,” she said for Jared’s comfort, taking the sheet from Chloe without sparing her much of a second glance. “She’s my dinner. Chloe, say hi.”

“Hi,” said Chloe. 

“Not every year, just the last three winters. I got lucky with species passing through. Not all species migrate either, so I imagine it’ll be harder the more I try and do it.” Jared spoke softly in return to her question. He would always be happy to share, especially considering she seemed to be just as kind with his own questions. He opened his mouth to greet the new face but instead sucked in a breath at Lydia's words. He floundered for a moment on what to say. He looked up at Chloe with his mouth uselessly open. This carried on for a few moments before he caught his breakings and he mumbled “Oh, hi.” His gaze dropped from the girl and to Lydia and His joined hands. “Dinner?” he asked quietly, he knew the answer was likely going to be no, but he asked anyway. “Like a guest?” Didn’t hurt to try.

 “You can go now,” Lydia said to Chloe, and as if her feet had been unglued from the floor, the bolted, down the hall and up the stairs. Oh, Jared frightened her too. All of Lydia’s friends did. Even if Lydia couldn’t quite meet his gaze as Jared fumbled. She wasn’t ashamed, she wasn’t, but maybe it had been too soon. Maybe he was still too human, too empathetic to them, maybe he couldn’t accept that Lydia couldn’t do anything but. That was what made it easier for most people to stomach. She couldn’t drink cow’s blood or eat cow brains, there was no vegan substitute. But even if there was, why would she wish to stop herself from tasting that kind of rush? “No, not like a guest. I eat human lifeforce, Jared. That’s what Leanan-Sidhe do. In return, she writes the most amazing music she could possibly write.”

He was still holding her hand. Jared didn’t want to let go, he didn’t know what to think about what he was hearing just yet, but he didn’t want to remove the comfort he’d come to give without hearing the rest. He finally looked up at her and caught her eye as she spoke. “You… to live you need to?” he asked. He just knew so little about anything. He was so behind, so out of the loop with everything from his own species that it hadn’t crossed his mind that any of them wouldn’t eat food like humans needed to for life. “Do you...eat normal food too or just...people?” It was an odd thing to ask, nothing he’d ever imagined having to inquire about in his life. But here he was, being fae truly was a whole new world. A world he was jumping into very late in the game. 

Once Jared looked at her, Lydia met his gaze, and barely even blinked, so unwilling to drop it. He was already beginning to understand. He wasn’t pulling away. She could talk him through this. “I have to,” Lydia confirmed again, watching for every little flicker, every little hesitation. Her lips quirked downwards as he accused her of eating people. Lydia never would unless it was an emergency, and even then, she’d only take the tiniest sliver. People didn’t deserve it, but humans were prey. “I can eat human food, and I can enjoy it, but it doesn’t provide any nutritional value anymore. I haven’t been able to live off anything but humans since I was a teenager.”

Have to was something Jared never argued with. It went hand in hand with what was in a species nature. And as such a big advocate for defending his kids for things they couldn’t help or that were ‘in their nature’ he’d been slowly applying his logic to people as well the more he found out about others. The divide between what he used to consider morally wrong and what he was becoming to accept as truly morally wrong was widening, but he didn’t notice. But he needed the clarification. She’d been so patient with him before now, he hoped she’d extend it now even if Jared was the one who had initially arrived to show her the support, he now needed from her. “How does it work?” he asks her. “Is it, specific to Leanan-sidhe?” 

“It is specific to us. I think it’s one of the reasons we’re so rare. Humans can’t stand it. Hunters would kill us as soon as looking at us.” Lydia’s headache was starting to return, so she let her head back on the couch, squeezing his hand to let him know she was still there as she closed her eyes so that the light could not hurt her. “It’s permanent. You can’t grow back life the way you can grow back blood or anything like that. There is no substitute. I can feed from just standing near people, but it’s like snacking on an apple, it isn’t enough. Mouth to mouth contact is how I need to eat, every few days.” Maybe her headache wasn’t the only reason she’d shut her eyes. Lydia held him even tighter now, like she was afraid he might leave. She was. “How does that make you feel?”

Jared knew the hunter mentality well and he didn’t like it one bit. He was biased against, in fact, far enough to truly despise the whole system of humans that trained to take out the beings he protected for simply existing. It wasn’t right. His beliefs were challenged by the upbringing he’d had, his ‘parents’ had raised him to believe every human should be allowed to live, but the whole balance of the earth defied that, an earth he was much more closely tied to than his human non blood related family. And yet it was hard to shake. He wasn’t like other fae, he’d grown up loving the humans around him and he still did. It was a hard pill to swallow, but he would. He squeezed her hand tightly and gave her a half shrug- not that she could see it. He combined his parents’ ideals and his own as he said “You’re part of the world, you deserve to be here just as much as anyone else. And if it’s natural to you…. If it's in your nature...who am I to say otherwise? It’d make me a huge hypocrite to advocate for balance, and then not support what you need to do to live…”

His words loosened up the temporary knot in Lydia’s chest. It would be a terrible thing, to love someone so much and to lose them so quickly to so pesky a thing as human morals. “Just like that, you’ve summarised something so few understand. I’m not wrong just for existing, no more so than any other predator. Hell, I do what the humans do.” Her victory speech was cut short by a sharply increasing pain in her back. Her face went pale as she looked up at him. “You’re a very good friend, you know?”

He gave her a small smile. She was teaching him about the world they were both part of, he trusted her judgement, and he appreciated her asking what he thought even if she wasn’t sorry about it. She gave him the time to decide and that would always mean something to the nymph. He wasn’t intelligent like others but given the time he could come to some alright conclusions. Jared noticed her face pale and he looked down at her soft look. “I’m sorry for barging in Lydia. I just wanted to contribute to your safety now that you’re home. Will you keep Cap here for me? Even if you don’t need him it’d make me feel like I don’t have to swing by every day, I’m sure that’d be annoying.”

“I will,” Lydia agreed, looking down to Cap again with a soft little smile, her nerves dissolving under his kind words. Maybe this was enough, for right now. Not talking about it, not trying to find words to describe the nightmares that ate at her, but instead leaning into the acceptance and comfort of her friends. They didn’t need to heal her, to be therapy for her, just this. Lydia took her his hand both of hers, tracing the veins of his arms idly. “You’re always welcome here, Jared. Always.”

Jared would think about what she’d said, but ultimately, he couldn’t imagine coming to a different conclusion about all she’d said. He believed in balance, and if her species existed and this was how they lived that was that. The earth had spoken. He was pleased also to find he was welcome; he’d surely be stopping in more often now he knew that. “I’ll take you up on that.” he hummed in response. 

[letterboxd]

The Pantomimes of Racism.

Aaron Yap surveys the cinema landscape of slavery narratives, from The Birth of a Nation to Roots to Sankofa to Us, as he talks to writer-director duo Gerard Bush and Christopher Renz about their new addition to the catalog, Antebellum.

“It was important to us that we not serve as co-conspirators to further erasure of American history and not white-wash the past.” —Gerard Bush

Given its deep-seated psychic baggage as America’s original sin, slavery remains among the most contentious of subject matters to be portrayed in film. Widely embraced depictions are rare, while the notoriety of those tactless, or simply racist, offenders generally looms large in conversation.

Lest we forget, cinema itself was birthed in a vat of virulent racism. A monumental accomplishment like DW Griffith’s groundbreaking The Birth of a Nation (1915) was also a monument to the Ku Klux Klan. Likewise, Victor Fleming’s highly regarded Civil War-era romance Gone with the Wind (1939) presents the viewer with a problematic dichotomy: it’s an extraordinary feat of filmmaking, deeply—even perversely—intoxicating, but all its extravagant, impassioned melodrama cannot wash away the odious stain of its Black caricatures and pro-Confederacy cheerleading.

At the extreme end of this spectrum lurks the stomach-churning shockumentary tactics of Gualtiero Jacopetti and Franco Prosperi’s Goodbye Uncle Tom (1971). So deliberately pornographic in its attempts to upset and shock under the guise of educational, telling-it-like-it-is accuracy, this mondo opus might be the least easily recommendable movie ever—a film that once prompted Pauline Kael to deem it “the most specific and rabid incitement to race war.”

When citing respectable dramatizations of slavery, the Emmy-winning miniseries adaptation of Alex Haley’s sprawling bestseller Roots (1977) is still considered a benchmark. Without sacrificing the horrific authenticity of the experience, it was captivating, commercial television, but most crucially, a long-overdue corrective, centering African-Americans in a screen telling of their history. Also notable, both for its Black-centered storytelling and the ultra-independence of its 1983 release, is the little-seen Sankofa by Ethiopian filmmaker Haile Gerima—a member of the LA Rebellion (and father of Merawi Gerima, whose debut Residue has just landed on Netflix). Sankofa transports a contemporary African-American fashion model back in time to a slave plantation; it’s both a reckoning and an awakening, in honor of the “stolen spirits of Africa”.

Yet “white savior” narratives are prevalent to this day, whether it’s the well-meaning, virtuous legal theater of Steven Spielberg’s Amistad (1997) or the blaxploitation-tinged revisionist fantasia of Quentin Tarantino’s Django Unchained (2012). Even Steve McQueen’s much-lauded adaptation of abolitionist Solomon Northup’s memoir 12 Years a Slave (2013) isn’t completely untethered from the assistance of a white hand.

Perhaps something thornier like Richard Fleischer’s Mandingo (1975), frequently written off as a lurid, trashy potboiler imagining of the slave trade, deserves more than a cursory look for the way it removes clearly delineated archetypes of heroes and villains, and cathartic beats of obstacle and triumph, from the slave narrative. It exposes the poisoned capitalist pathology that produces the system—observing how souls, constantly besieged by hubris, greed and frail egos, self-implode as the unchecked power that comes with the commodification of human bodies grows.

Kiersey Clemons and Janelle Monáe in ‘Antebellum’.

Now available digitally after its theatrical release was abandoned due to Covid, Gerard Bush and Christopher Rez’s Antebellum contributes another complicated, fascinating wrinkle to the nuances of slavery cinema. The film arrives at a particularly volatile time, with additional resonance provided by the on-going, extremely topical plight of inequity faced by Black Americans.

Employing the malleable, high-concept language of genre to connect the sins of the past with the present—imagine something in the vicinity of Blumhouse doing Octavia E. Butler’s Kindred, or rebooting Sankofa for that matter—Antebellum is of a piece with the gathering momentum behind the popularity of recent Black-centered genre fare, from Jordan Peele’s horror outings Get Out (2017) and Us (2019) to recent HBO shows like Watchmen and Lovecraft Country. The temporal tricksiness of the film’s narrative structure means spoiler-free synopsizing is a fool’s errand, but “it’s not a traditional horror”, Renz says, proffering “a thriller with horror elements” to describe it.

What is clear from the get-go is that something’s a little off, and the film potentially has one foot in The Twilight Zone. Opening with a quote from William Faulkner’s Requiem for a Nun (“The past is never dead. It’s not even past”), Bush and Renz, who shared writing and directing duties, waste no time thrusting us—via a visually stunning five-minute one-take tracking shot—onto an impossibly beautiful Louisiana plantation where we’re introduced to Eden, the first of two roles played by Janelle Monáe, a slave whose plans to escape are brutally thwarted by Confederate officers.

The filmmakers maintained vigilance in their recreation of trauma and the slave experience. “It was important to us that we not serve as co-conspirators to further erasure of American history and not white-wash the past,” says Bush. “But it was always of equal importance that we not engage in gratuitous violence. It was all for a meaning and purpose. So much of it is off-screen—we don’t have any physical whipping or anyone at the whipping post or any of that. This is to inform and educate and move the story forward. It’s not meant to serve as some sort of entertainment for violence sake.”

Gabourey Sidibe, Janelle Monáe and Lily Cowles in ‘Antebellum’.

Similarly, Bush says they were deliberate in their approach to using racial epithets of its time. The N-word is conspicuously absent for a film set in the Antebellum South. “It gives the audience an off-ramp to say, ‘That’s not language I would use so that’s not me, so I don’t have to engage in this and I don’t have to confront it’. These are the pantomimes of racism. The N-word and those words—they’re meant to dehumanize but just because you’re not hearing the word in the public square anymore—because it is no longer socially appropriate—doesn’t mean that all of the brutality and inequity that the word, the avatar, represented doesn’t exist anymore. It was important to us that we use the same language as Gone with the Wind in a way that they would refer to the enslaved people as the inferiors.”

In a purposefully disorienting plot shift, Antebellum moves off plantation grounds in its second act to establish Monáe’s second role, Veronica, a successful present-day academic promoting her new book Shedding the Coping Persona. Although the physical subjugation and barbarity of the past have disappeared, insidious micro-aggressions and hints remain, including the sinister presence of Jena Malone’s Southern antagonist Elizabeth, who also appears in both timelines.

For this portion, the film allows Veronica, who’s assertive, confident, free—the seeming mirror opposite of Eden—to live powerfully in her moment. Often accompanied by her bestie Dawn (a rambunctious, scene-stealing Gabourey Sidibe), these scenes foreground intersectionality, reflecting Bush and Renz’s desire to show Black women in a way that was familiar to them. “We’re surrounded by extraordinary Black women we see doing extraordinary things all the time.” Bush says. “We just don’t see it depicted on screen and we were determined that we had our opportunity, we were going to do that.”

Christopher Renz and Gerard Bush on the set of ‘Antebellum’.

Stylish, visually stunning and effectively pointed, Antebellum marks a natural career progression for Bush and Renz, who began in advertising before moving into social advocacy work. “For Christopher and [me], that competitive side from advertising is what lent itself so beautifully to our waking up one day and saying we didn’t want to sell champagne for the rest of our lives, but that we needed to tell stories that mattered, especially after Trayvon was murdered.”

“Once we decided to make movies it was because we didn’t see anything in the marketplace that looked like us. I don’t think that with the finite amount of time that we have in our lives, from when we’re born to when we transition and exit out of this place, that you want to waste it committing your life to something you don’t think you can be the best at that—that you can make meaningful contribution.”

Related content

Adam Davie’s Black Life in Film list

Letterboxd member Anjelica Jade’s review of Antebellum for Vulture

Haile Gerima’s 2019 TIFF Talk about Sankofa and independent filmmaking

Cece’s list of lighthearted movies with Black characters in them because we deserve movies that aren’t about slavery, racism, police brutality and the like

Follow Aaron on Letterboxd

[abigailmaitland]

andi mack season 4.

4A ONLY.

Episode One.

Andi’s first day of SAVA. Buffy, Cyrus, Marty, TJ, and Jonah’s first day of Grant High school. They facetime before entering the school and wish each other luck. Jokes about how huge and old everyone is compared to them. They don’t have as many classes together as they used to. Jonah, feeling out of place, has a panic attack while getting his lunch. Andi feeling very out of place during  her lunch texts Jonah - jokingly blaming him for making her accidentally submit her application. Jonah, instead of texting back accidentally facetimes her during his panic attack. Andi, shocked and concerned, helps him calm down. Jonah asks her if she really blames him. Andi, of course says no, and reassures him that one day she’ll probably thank him. Jonah returns to lunch, the group is confused as to where he went, he makes a face and just says “uh, high school food, right?” cyrus says “say no more. please.”

At the end of the school day everyone meets at The Spoon and talks about their first day. Andi comes home to balloons, cupcake, excited parents and a grandparent, who really want to hear EVERYTHING.

Episode Two.

Andi deals with a strict teacher who is very critical of her art for the first time in her life. She struggles with feeling inadequate because she has never had an art teacher not love her work. Definitely cries.

It’s club week at Grant High School, a week where the school encourages everyone to join a club/sport, especially incoming freshman. Buffy, Marty, and TJ immediately know where they belong (basketball & track respectively) whereas Cyrus and Jonah are lost on where to start. Cyrus grabs pamphlets for theater, photography, debate, student leadership, the student newspaper and tries to create a pros/cons list for each one. Jonah feels confused about where he belongs in school, in the group, in life. He misses the old dynamic and feels lost without Andi because everyone else is in a relationship. Being a third wheel is fine, you know, and not totally useless. But there is never a need for a fifth wheel.

Club spirit spreads outside of Grant High school. Bowie decides to join a morning yoga group, Bex starts photography classes as she’s started to take ‘before/after’ portraits for Cloud 10 as well as joins SAVA’s PTA, Cece continues her dance classes.

Episode Three.

Andi finds familiar faces at SAVA. Walker and Libby introduce Andi into their friend group. Andi tells them about the teacher who criticized her art; they reassure her that she’s tough on everyone and that she belongs here.

Buffy helps Cyrus choose the clubs he should join; debate and the student newspaper. He thanks her for knowing him; sometimes better than himself. Jonah continues to have a hard time in high school - whereas the rest of the group have slowly become acclimated to the environment. He used to know so many people and now he feels like he barely knows a fraction. Buffy, Cyrus, TJ, and Marty always include him, but they seem to be so seamless together and Jonah feels like he can’t keep us. He liked when it was just Buffy, Cyrus, him, and Andi. He likes when he hangs out with Cyrus by himself. Or Buffy and Cyrus. He feels like he still has a place with them. He’s determined relationships really do ruin everything.

TJ takes Cyrus on a date and gets embarrassed by his dyscalculia when he tries to pay in cash and finds himself taking too long to count his change and bills. Cyrus asks if he could help - TJ gets frustrated at himself and says he wanted to have a perfect date with him and not look like an idiot. Cyrus reminds TJ he’s not an idiot and offers to help him again. TJ sighs and nods his head. Cyrus counts TJ’s change with him.

Episode Four.

Buffy, Andi, and Cyrus have a sleepover weekend at Cece’s house. During the first night, they almost call it off because Buffy and Cyrus can’t stop texting Marty/TJ and talking about them. Andi reminds them that she’s supposed to be one of their best friends - can’t they have a few nights where they don’t think about boys? They sit in silence for like, an hour, and Buffy sighs, turns off her phone and gives it to Andi. Cyrus follows suit. They both apologize. They have a movie marathon, talk about school, stay up late talking about the future, Andi makes them all friendship bracelets.

At Buffy’s request, Marty invites TJ and Jonah to hang out at his house. They all sit there uncomfortably eating snacks for awhile, realizing despite being together everyday at high school they barely know each other. Marty breaks the ice and they play a game of 21 Questions. We learn more about all three boys and they become more comfortable around each other.

Bex and Bowie have a date night with another couple their age. This isn’t focused on as I think it would be boring for most viewers, but I just want to show them with age-appropriate friends, pls and thank <3

Episode Five.

Andi talks to Walker about his relationship with her and his relationship with Buffy. They reconcile with the past and admit they were pretty dumb as middle schoolers, huh? Andi says yes and then says “we’ll probably think that about ourselves now one day, won’t we?” Walker says “definitely.”

Cyrus asks Jonah why he’s been so out of it recently. Jonah claims that he’s not and they get into an argument, leading Jonah to say “I liked it better when no one was together. I’m not part of this group!” Jonah leaves lunch early, bumping into Amber. She can tell how upset he is. They sit against some lockers in a quiet hallway and talk. Amber tells him sometimes groups change. Jonah says he hates change and just wants everything to be how it was before. Amber says he feels like that now, but reminds him that he felt that way when they were in a relationship too, and would he still really want to be with her? Jonah says no (no offense) and that he guessed some changes were okay. Amber seems to have reconciled with their past and is okay being friends with him. Jonah says “Sometimes I wonder what’s wrong with me.” Amber tells him that she goes to therapy because she felt that way too. He asks if she found the answer. She says yes, and that she finds the solutions too.

Jonah texts Cyrus that he’s sorry. During gym class, he asks to go to the guidance counselor. The guidance counselor talks to Jonah and helps him come to terms with going to therapy and what to expect.

Episode Six.

Libby is angry and upset because they haven’t given her an interpreter yet and she’s struggling to keep up with the coursework and feels ostracized by her teachers. For a group project, Walker, Andi and Libby team up to create an art piece encompassing deaf culture and how deaf rights matter. They bring it to the principal’s office and tell them it’s illegal to not provide Libby an interpreter. 

At Grant, Cyrus goes against a homophobic debater during a practice round (probably about either marriage laws or the guy who refused to bake a cake). He loses because he can’t keep his points straight due to getting too upset. He immediately texts TJ. TJ gets really angry and meets him at the debate room - they go to a hidden, empty corner of the high school. Cyrus cries, TJ comforts him with hugs and head kisses. Cyrus says he hates hiding who he is. TJ says he does too. Cyrus asks to come out publicly. TJ hesitates. “I don’t know if I’m ready?” Cyrus sighs. “Fine...but I’m going to come out to my parents. They don’t have to know about us, though.”

Cyrus gathers all 4 parents in the same room and comes out.

TJ thinks about coming out to his parents, but backs out.

Episode Seven.

Bowie tries to get the Mack family on a vegan diet after learning more about it during his morning yoga class. Andi is pretty accepting of it, but Bex struggles to maintain the diet. Bowie teaching them about how much meat can affect the environment. He makes them try a whole week with no meat and dairy - Bex starts sneaking to Cece’s to eat pizza, burgers, and ice cream.

Buffy notices Marty liking and commenting on two different “cute”/”model-type” girls pictures on social media. They’re both white. She texts Cyrus. Cyrus asks if maybe they’re related, but none of them share his last name. She also overheard a group of older girls talking about how real guys hate “athletic” girls and stop liking them after middle school. Buffy gets jealous, uncomfortable, and insecure. She stops talking to him and ignores during school. At the end of the week, she straightens her hair again and dresses more traditionally feminine. Marty notices and says “you look great, but...what’s up?” Buffy admits that she thought he would like her better this way. Marty asks why - she says that she found out he’s been liking other girls’ pictures and that none of them looked like her. Marty gets embarrassed and says that those girls are his future step-sisters and that his father, Antonio Sousa, just proposed and started egging him to be “nicer” and get closer to the girls. Buffy feels embarrassed. Marty assures her that she doesn’t have to be, that he should have told her and that he barely talked about his family because he thinks it’s “too messy” - he says she looks the most beautiful when she’s comfortable with herself.

Bex admits to Bowie that she’s been sneaking non-vegan food. He’s upset at first, but they come to a compromise. They will have three meatless nights instead of every single day. He understands that it’s a huge life-style change and admits that he’s cheated a little bit too, but that the environment is really important to him because “I want Andi to be able to enjoy this Earth to the fullest...and any other kid we might have.”

Bex says ‘um’

Episode Eight.

Marty, Jonah, and TJ hang out again. This time is more personal - Jonah talks about therapy and Marty talk about his changing family. Since they’re being personal, TJ admits that he’s struggling to tell his family and the wider school that he’s gay and dating Cyrus. The boys listen and try to give advice, but ultimately feel like they can’t really help and say that they’re sure Cyrus understands. TJ nods. “He understands for now, but eventually he won’t want to be with someone in the closet. He wants to be himself.”

Andi and Amber hang out for the first time in forever. Amber admits that she’s just been so bogged down because she’s taking college classes, stressing herself out plus family drama. Andi says that she’s been pretty stressed too and that the classes and projects are a lot harder than she imagined and that she misses always being with the GHC. Amber says that change is necessary and that distance makes the heart grow fonder and that she bet Andi is the best in the school, that she’s just being hard on herself. Andi shows Amber pictures of other’s art - Amber smiles and says that “yours is still the best, bambi.” Andi thanks Amber for being such a great friend.

Cyrus and TJ are distant and haven’t had their weekly date or even really texted. During basketball practice, TJ is frustrated and awful. The teammates ask where Cyrus is, saying that he’s almost always there for their practice as their good luck charm. TJ ignores the question and tries to shoot a three-pointer, missing over and over again. The teammates tell him to chill and take a break. TJ, frustrated, just yells “I’m gay!” His teammates are taken aback, but none seem outwardly opposed. “um...okay?” TJ sits down and drinks water. He says “I’m sorry. I just had to get that out there...for um...Cyrus.” it finally clicks for the team. They’re supportive bc they love Cyrus.

Bex asks Bowie how long he’s been thinking about more kids. Bowie admits that it just kind of came up - that someone in his yoga club was pregnant and his mind started wandering. He says that obviously he wouldn’t force it on Bex, just that he didn’t want to rule it out now either. He reminds her that he didn’t get to raise Andi and is disappointed he missed so many moments. Bex says he didn’t have to remind her and says she will always regret that she kept it a secret from him - but that she isn’t sure about another kid. Financially and emotionally. Bowie says he understands.

Episode Nine.

The mid-year project for SAVA is coming up. Andi is stressed as heck - she can’t think of what she wants to say to the world. She doubts she was ever an artist to begin with. It’s 3am and she finds herself texting Cyrus because she knows he’s always up. Cyrus says that she’s feeling impostor syndrome - but that she earned her place in SAVA, fair and square, and it was obviously because her application or some force in the universe. She says that sometimes she wishes she wasn’t in SAVA and that she went to Grant with the rest. Cyrus says that he misses her but knows in his heart that Andi belongs in SAVA. He updates her on him and TJ and how TJ doesn’t want to come out and he feels like TJ is embarrassed of him and who they are. Andi comforts Cyrus and reminds him how long it took him to tell her he liked Jonah and that they’re just in different parts of the journey. Andi gets an idea for her art project.

Buffy & Marty go on a date. He decides to take her to The Brazilian Day festival in town to teach her more about his culture. Buffy loves learning more about him, including that he can speak some Portuguese and that he can dance really well.

TJ asks Cyrus on a date. Cyrus hesitates. TJ smiles and says it can be a real date and that they can hold hands in public and post pictures on Instagram. Cyrus asks if he came out and TJ nods, before grinning and hugging him.

Bex hints to Cece that Bowie is thinking about another child. Cece tells her how much she’s grown as an adult and as a mother and that Cece is confident that Bex can make a choice. Bex has baby on the brain and is constantly focused on pregnancy - which all comes to head when she does a maternity shoot for her photography. She feels mixed feelings and talks to one of her friends to try to sort out her feelings.

Episode Ten. FINALE.

Andi’s project about change & growing up doesn’t go over well because she rushed it at 3am. This is the first time she’s failed a project and she’s devastated. Cyrus tries to cheer her up with The Spoon and a sleepover with a lot of ice cream.

Marty invites Buffy to his father’s wedding. It goes over well & they slow dance together for the first time. 

Bex tells Bowie that she’s not against having another child, she was just scared. Bowie admits that he’s scared too...maybe they can face the fear together?

Jonah decides to join the music club, as well as participate in the high school “coffee houses” where students showcase their musical talents. He feels like he’s acclimating better.

[hon-eeeybee]

Ya know, I truly love New Girl. I know a lot of people talk about how the cast could be more diverse and that is true, it's almost always true, but for what it is it's a truly great show.

Their are episodes based around their male characters p much just learning that it's ok to express and talk about emotion. There are episodes based around the simple concept of men getting used to rooming w a women and getting to learn what women are REALLY like, completely shattering all those stupid ideas some guys have of women being beautiful and flowy and clean and put together all the time.

The individual characters amaze me, too. Nick getting most of the way through law school and passing the bar exam, becoming a LAWYER, before deciding to back down and become a bartender instead bc it just suited him better. I feel it's important for people to acknowledge that they should be doing what makes them happy rather than what would impress others.

Schmidt learning to chill tf out. Also, learning that Schmidt's obsession w affection comes from a withholding mother, his insecurity causing him to allow himself to continue to be bullied by anyone who knew him when he was overweight. Schmidt is a total douche but it's mostly bc he's an incredibly vulnerable person. He loves people so easily and let's people in so quickly. I mean he was determined to hate Jess and then she did 1 thing to show she cared abt him and they were friends for life.

Winston undergoes a TOTAL personality change. He goes from being convinced he's the top dog having played pro basketball, to having his life revolve around his cat and becoming a cop.

Cece going from only caring abt Jess and her job as a model to caring abt anyone and everyone she comes in contact w. Going from only thinking about modelling to planning a family, a marriage, a future, planning a career when she can't model anymore.

Jess becoming more grounded in reality, learning more abt what people are REALLY like and learning to accept it. Learning how to have a casual sexual relationship *cough* Sam *cough*, finding real love - no subtlety at all here - NICK, and while the guys are learning abt girls she's learning abt guys. After thinking she knew everything.

Maybe I'm just a sucker for character development, this show has a hell of it, but..

Idk, random rant, still. It's a good show. You should check it out if you haven't.

[nellie-elizabeth]

Grey's Anatomy: Shelter from the Storm (15x09)

Yay I'm glad this show is finally back. So much drama. I'm going to try be brief... we'll see how that goes.

Cons:

The baby drama is not compelling to me... sorry Teddy. I really do like you as a character. It's just so... basic melodramatic. There are other basic melodrama tropes in this show - in this very episode - that I like, but it's just a personal preference thing. The angst-filled love triangle, the pregnancy, etc. etc. It's just an annoying snooze fest. I particularly didn't like that Amelia has decided to give Owen some space. Just... come on. Can we stop going down this road?

I loved the scenes with Meredith and DeLuca in the elevator, I really did, but I hate it when shows get their nerd jargon wrong. DeLuca talks about Doctor Who and calls the character Doctor Who, instead of the Doctor. Isn't there a single nerd working in the writer's room that could catch something like that? Sheesh.

Pros:

Okay. Let's rapid-fire this.

Meredith and DeLuca have some steamy chemistry, and their whole scene in the elevator was excellent. I loved finding out more about DeLuca's past, and the reveal that Meredith understands Italian was pitch perfect. So funny. I'm totally rooting for this weird potential relationship. And it is actually pretty hot when DeLuca speaks Italian, I must admit. This new confident turn for his character is really working for me.

I was complaining above about love triangles, but really it's specifically angst-y love triangles that I have a problem with. I love the goofy tone of Meredith's current romantic troubles - DeLuca or Link? Who should she choose? Why not both? I'm all about it, and I'm excited to see more.

CeCe dying was a really difficult pill to swallow. The way they framed this sad reveal in the episode was so perfect and tragic. We hear Meredith telling CeCe about her romantic relationships one last time, as she says goodbye to CeCe. Awww.

Bailey and Helm are stuck in an elevator together with CeCe's donor patient, and both of them end up having panic attacks. I loved it when Helm realized what was going on, and worked to calm Bailey down.

Speaking of Bailey... she is really going through something difficult. I loved the fact that Alex at first thought that Bailey was trying to remove him from his position, but the minute he sees how upset Bailey is, he changes tracks and is entirely sympathetic and worried about her. I also like seeing Alex take on the responsibilities of interim chief, even when it comes to awkward stuff, like...

Nico and Levi in the ambulance. Alex's advice? Find a place with a door that locks next time. I kind of think they're the cutest. We're seeing more of what makes Nico tick. I like how worried he is about making a good impression, as a new hospital employee. I'm rooting for these two crazy kids.

I liked the through-line about the electric manager guy, who got his legs smashed by the elevator. He was so grumpy, and so annoyed with all the doctors, but at the end of the day he did everything he could to get those organs to CeCe. It's such a tragedy that she didn't make it, but at least the story has a semi-happy ending for everyone else involved: it looks like this guy is going to retain the use of his legs! Jackson was such a bad-ass helping out with the stuck elevators, too.

While the Amelia/Owen/Teddy situation is annoying me, I do find myself continually intrigued by poor Betty. In this episode, she spends a lot of time talking with Richard about her addiction, but we learn that she's not ready yet to help herself. Amelia decides to help her by putting her in rehab. Ultimately it seems that Betty's goal is to get better and get Leo back, but she's got a long way to go. I want to keep checking in on her, and I hope she and Amelia can stay in each other's lives in some form.

I still think that Catherine Avery having cancer is a really stupid turn of events. But I must admit, I found myself really compelled by what we saw in this episode. Jackson's reaction is to kind of push it down and go into crisis mode, helping the hospital as best he can. Then, Jackson and Maggie have to go tell Richard. We don't get to see the actual moment the truth comes out. We just see Jackson walking up to Richard and putting a hand on his arm, and then Maggie takes Richard's hand. He accepts the comfort before he understands the reason for it, and it was just so well-acted. Poor guy. This is going to hurt. Their family dynamics are fascinating.

That's what I have for now. I find myself more compelled by the light-hearted stories, like with Meredith and her boys, or Nico and Levi, as opposed to the more heavy drama going on in other stories. This was a solid opening to the second half of Season Fifteen... here's to more great content!

8/10