#and by that I mean they’re written perfectly to be despised

[physalian]

It occurs to me that the books I want to read feature elements and characters that are DNF-able for others so I thought it’d be fun to list the various concepts I’ve written about that I legit didn’t think about being objectionable.

I think coming from fanfic where the solution to many canon problems are exactly the scenarios I’ve written has muddied my perception of all this. Not meant to be mean-spirited, for some of these I very much went “ohhhhh, I forgot that people don’t like this”.

Neurodivergent characters

Markus, in ENNS, is on the autism spectrum. I had a neurotypical beta reader way back when absolutely despise him and make no effort to understand him, calling him unsympathetic and confusing.

Which must mean I wrote him perfectly.

He gets to have a variety of scenes, from those focusing on the frustrations of being autistic among neurotypicals, the limitations autistics face in certain situations, the strengths of not being neurotypical in certain situations, and just little moments here and there that put Markus apart from others as autism isn’t a thing you switch off, nor is it always visibly obvious, but if you know, you know.

A lot of my work predates my understanding of my own neurodivergence, otherwise I’d like there to be more.

Asexual characters

It’s tough, when you write books with romance as the secondary genre, that you’re going to have disappointed readers no matter what who expected differently because allosexuality(?) is the norm and especially recently, smut carries otherwise awful storylines so not having it is a massive letdown, no matter how clearly you state that it’s not that kind of romance.

I’d love to market ENNS more forwardly as a romance novel, but if I do, I risk people getting salty that asexuality is ruining their ability to vicariously enjoy the smut that isn’t happening.

Queer characters

Across three fictional worlds that I’ve spent the most time writing in, here’s my current list of queer major characters:

Iris (LRD) Bisexual

Bellamy (LRD) Trans, ace, panromantic

Reese (LRD) Bisexual

Bastian (LRD) Gay

Anaiya (LRD) Aro, lesbian

Neja (TMHL) Nonbinary

Bee (TMHL) Nonbinary

Zeba (TMHL) Nonbinary

Seamus (TMHL) Gay

Elias (ENNS) Gay

Dorian (ENNS) Aroace, bisexual, polyamorous

Kymiria (ENNS) Bisexual, polyamorous

Markus (ENNS) Demisexual, gay

Quinn (ENNS) Trans

Blane (ENNS) Pan

Gregori (ENNS) Ace

I… I was not aware in 2025 that not reading a romance on the grounds of it being queer, while calling oneself an ally, was still a thing. Whoops. Given that “make the love triangle poly” is a thing that abounds in fanfic, I was also surprised when I had beta readers hating Dorian like he was “cheating” when it’s stated pretty explicitly, within the linguistic bounds of this fantasy setting, that he’s poly and has an open relationship with his main partner.

Depressed characters/PTSD

My boy Bel ain’t your angst fodder PTSD, he’s written intentionally to be frustrating, uncooperative, illogical at times, and self-sabotaging and a little ridiculous with his worldviews and assumptions about other people. I had a beta reader who said I wrote him too well, that she had no sympathy for his bullshit and didn’t like whenever I wrote in his POV when plot happened and he got very difficult.

Character development gotta start somewhere.

I also tend to have characters with non-“tropey” phobias, like when they’re only the butt of the joke or never explored by the narrative and taken seriously.

Bel has claustrophobia and thalassophobia. Elias has acrophobia and thalassophobia. Dorian has (eventually) pyrophobia. Gregori has germophobia.

I’ve done my best to write some serious takes on panic attacks at different degrees, intrusive thoughts, and just general behavior that comes with living with these fears and the efforts to avoid triggering them in various situations.

Consent, and no actually meaning no

I got to write a scene in ENNS where A propositioned B for sex, B said they weren’t in the mood, and A listened and immediately offered a different idea that B was quite happy to indulge in (it was snuggles).

I’ve also been able to write the antithesis to what I hate most in the usual romance novels I see: Character D ignores partner C’s ‘no’ and is very clearly in the wrong and punished by the narrative for it.

Sorry if that’s underwhelming I guess…?

I know I write about vampires but geez. Edward has already been written. There doesn’t need to be more of him.

—

So if you do like any of the above… you might like my stories?

(TMHL) Tell Me How Long has been published in ebook!

(ENNS) Eternal Night of the Northern Sky has been published in ebook and paperback!

Original books aren’t fanfic, I can’t front-load all the tags to prepare people for what to expect within the pages and I’ll admit I’m a little tired of unfounded expectations getting in the way. Nor can I tell people what not to expect, or appease them when they’re disappointed that what they want was never on the table in the first place.

[glitterarygetsit]

Oh I want to know what the GO roleplay is too!

Oooh, this is me thinking about how Aziraphale and Crowley canonically enjoy it when Crowley rescues Aziraphale, even though Az could get himself out of the situation perfectly well himself. So they're going to roleplay Az being all chained up and helpless and pretty and Crowley sweeping in all dashing and handsome to save him and have weird, multidimensional and probably quite soppy sex about it.

I really want to dig into that canonical kink of theirs, because it's hot and I'm into it too it says so much about them:

Aziraphale is into the idea of being rescued because 1) he would secretly like someone to rescue him from Heaven and all its attendant expectations, and 2) no-one up there cares enough to rescue him if he did get kidnapped or something. Aziraphale is pretending to be part of a big loving family that in reality is indifferent to him at best. He's desperate for someone to show him he matters enough to make an effort for.

Crowley has been forced into a villainous role he never wanted; he never gets to be a hero, except to the demons he despises. He's been hurt repeatedly by both Heaven and Hell, and despite his protestations that he isn't good (and I think he's uncomfortable precisely because he wants it so badly) he ultimately wants to be told he is worthwhile. He wants to do something so momentous that it makes up for whatever it is he did to Fall in the first place. And surely, rescuing an angel--rescuing an angel he loves--must fit the bill? And maybe, just maybe, if he does it right... that angel might love him back.

So I've only really written a few lines about this, but I am constantly rotating it. The teeny-tiniest of snippets under the cut, plus some wing stuff for good measure.

1.

“You look good in distress,” smirks Crowley.

Aziraphale blushes, which is definitely on purpose but also very endearing. He knows what he’s doing, the minx.

Crowley sweeps over and crowds Aziraphale against the table. 

2.

He runs his fingers over Aziraphale’s shoulderblades and feels him shudder as Crowley teases the sensitive skin there. Just because they’re in human form doesn’t mean they don’t have wings right now; they’re just temporarily folded into a different dimension, and the invisible crease is smooth and delicate beneath Crowley’s hands. Crowley reaches through the layers of the universe until he feels feathers beneath his fingertips, and Aziraphale gasps.

[sigmadolos]

Anonymous said: Proshippers aren’t drama hun, they’re vile pedophiles using RP to whack off to. If you are okay following people like that.I’m gonna warn all my bsd moots to block you asap for condoning nasty shit

  In all my years on Tumblr I’ve never had to deal with this sort of bs and I don’t like to give voice to hate, but alright here we go. Although I am fighting the flu and is like 5 a.m. so maybe not my most coherent post.

Anon, I don’t see you posting hate about Kafka Asagiri? You know, the man who WROTE BSD and the characters? The one who allows for child soldiers to blow themselves up? Who blew up a bus full of orphans? Who has Dazai abusing the shit out of Akutagawa? Or Naomi and Junichirio (esp Bones for this one) ? That’s problematic my friend. MOST media is problematic. But people LOVE Fyodor, they LOVE Dazai, but heaven forbid someone like’s Mori or some of these other characters. You can like a character and not condone what the character does. Dazai kills, Fyodor kills, Chuuya kills, Sigma kills. Does that mean I condone killing because I write a character that kills? No. Nor do i condone the religious extremism of Fyodor, or the torture Nikolai puts people though, or a million other things in media that I like. Also, I like mythology and let me tell you. That shit is problematic as fuck but funny enough, a lot of people even anti’s are like well no, THAT’S okay! Which.......I genuinely do not understand. Like...why is THAT okay? I do genuinely want to hear an explanation for that.

I don’t deal with the whole pro/anti shipper drama that goes around these days. But if I don’t like something? I block it. Be it a person, a ship tag, a character tag, whatever it is. YOU are responsible for curating your space. There are ships I loathe, ships that disgust me and I never ever want to see, and so I block those tags and that’s that. Easy, drama-free, and now my space is free from it. At the end of the day, it’s YOUR (well my in this example) responsibility to curate your online space. And that’s what blocking is for. I can recommend Tumblr Servant as an extension, you can write a URL or tag or whatever in it and have it so it’s not just blocked but just never appears if the URL is mentioned anywhere in the post. There’s a lot of subjects that need to be handled VERY carefully like abuse and mental illnesses and such, and I for one would never ever write certain topics in RP or ever, like pedophilia or rape & so on and so forth. And I don’t follow those who do because it makes me uncomfortable to see in RP. If your issue is DazAku and DazAtsu (which doesn’t?? even apply to me??) in both cases they’re 2 years different and both are 20+ ? And if its something about it not being perfectly healthy, boy do I have news for you because Soukoku, Fyolai, Fyozai, Shin-Soukoku, a lOT of those aren’t healthy from where they stand in canon. Not fanon, but canon. I will never, ever send death threats to someone, least of all over fiction. Because let me tell you, a lot of the real life authors? Very Problematic by today’s standards and sometimes their own.  

Also, frankly, i’ve been in the Hunter x Hunter fandom and there’s way worse there. Like...canonly. FYI since I know the blog sending this or at least one, KuroKura isn’t underage (though far from my cup of tea for many other reasons) , Kurapika is 18/19 in that arc and Chrollo is somewhere close to 24/26 ish. Not my cup of tea for many reasons, but figured I’d point that out for you so you might want to delete that post if you’re trying to make that blog a good ‘evidence’ source.

While I’m at it. You can LIKE a character and despise what they do and who they are. There’s characters i HATE, but I can appreciate how they’re a good hero, antihereo, or villain, or how they move the plot forward. Characters are (optimally) vehicles for the narrative. A character can be WELL written and despicable, some are written PURPOSEFULLY for the audience to hate that character as a character. 

Anyways, there’s my stance on things. If you want to soft or hardblock me, that’s fine. I’m not going to hate you for it, or stalk you over it, or whatever else people do. Please do whatever makes you comfortable. I will not perpetuate this circle of hatred. If I write with someone you don’t like, either block their tag (i tag it all) or if you need to softblock, that’s fine too Your health matters.

[literaila]

in which loki eats candy. begrudgingly.

*

convincing loki to try a gummy worm was turning out to be a surprisingly difficult task.

if the glare he was sending your way, and the frown that— always —seemed to be glued to his face, meant anything. he refused to meet your eyes, instead only looking your way when he thought you weren’t looking back.

you might have been playing it up a bit much. delighting in the small, wonderful pieces of sugar that tore between your teeth. the sounds of ecstasy every time you took a bite. the purposeful chewing sounds— mostly just to annoy him, you’ll admit. you wouldn’t deny that it was all a bit much.

but still, he was a bitter, sour-faced god, and he needed to try some candy.

you were certain it didn’t look bad. it was colorful, soft, perfectly sweet and not intimidating in the slightest.

…in hindsight, that probably should’ve been the first indicator that loki would hate it.

“c’mon,” you teased when you’d first noticed loki looking your way, peering eyes staring at the candy on the desk in front of you, confusion written between his brows. “i’ll give you one if you want”

he looked away quickly, disturbed at the thought of sharing maybe, or maybe the colorful look of the plastic bag you’d now opened. “that looks dreadful,” he drawled, turning away.

you laughed, never finding him serious, even when he was very. “you don’t like gummy worms?”

he scoffed. “i don’t need to try gummy worms to know that they’re miserable creatures, unworthy of my attention”

you’d tried your very hardest not to laugh, chortle, at that very clear statement, but, to be honest, it wasn’t an easy task. though, you did almost regret it after you noticed the scowl on loki’s face.

“they’re not actual worms, junior, it’s candy”

the glare only intensifies, loki has heard that word before, many times actually, but until now he’s never actually been in the proximity of the so-called-treat.

it’s really a shame.

“why would it be named after a living creature?”

you snort, pulling one out and holding it as close to him as you can as he’s sitting across the room from you, slightly leaned back in his overly dramatic swindle chair, watching you flaunt the small food in front of him. he looks far too comfortable for a god.

“it’s-“ you sigh and spin around in your chair— far smaller, definitely less comfortable than his, of course —“normally, people don’t take it quite so literally” you say, teasing him again, despite the ‘terrifying’ looks he’s giving you.

he doesn’t answer then, looking back to the papers in front of you, effectively ignoring you.

it would almost be infuriating, but you’re eating candy, so not much can change the pleasant mood you’re currently wearing.

“you can still have one, glorious god of the office, if you’d like,” you smile at him again, sweetly. “i’m not too opposed to sharing.”

loki stays silent for a moment before looking back at you, irritation— wonderful —the clearest emotion on his pale face.

and then

“i would never eat something so…” he pauses, smile as sweet as yours making its way onto its face (you might’ve appreciated it if it wasn’t accompanied by the glint in his eyes). “..vulgar”

and you know, you are absolutely aware that he’s trying to irritate you now, it’s the most obvious thing in the world and still, he’s undeniably good at getting under your skin.

you huff, shove a handful of gummy worms in your mouth, sending a nod his way and returning to your work.

loki would never win this game that you’d started. you wouldn’t allow it.

it’s minutes later when you have the idea, possibly the best one you’ve had all day.

and that is how you end up here, chewing loudly, trying to irritate the only god in the room with your insistent delight, hoping to break him before it’s time to go home.

and really, he could seriously use a bit of candy.

he’s been looking your way, you can feel it despite the papers you’re filling out, his terrible gaze on your face, the furrowed brows you know are awaiting your eyes for when you look up. he’s terribly inconspicuous.

you moan once more before he’s leaning back in his chair once again.

“would you quit it?” he hisses.

but, of course, you don’t know what he’s talking about.

“what?” innocently, pulling another worm out of the bag and stuffing your face with it before you laugh.

“your-“ he groans. “those noises! they’re very distracting, not to mention annoying and loud.”

“i don’t know what you’re talking about,”

there’s another smile, another groan. and you’re almost sure that loki is about to storm out of the office, crowded with only the two of you now, and leave for the night.

but wait, you haven’t gotten him to try one yet.

“would you maybe.. be jealous of my candy, loki?” the way you say it makes it seem like the most scandalous thing in the world, and the roll of loki’s eyes doesn’t escape your notice.

“of course not,” he answers, arms crossed over his chest as he stares at you openly now, shooting glares to the bag of candy every few seconds.

“hmm” is all you say, disbelief clear in your voice.

loki scowls again, watching your calm face. and you can see the composure slip from him as he finally, with the tension of several men, puts a hand out in front of you.

you almost cackle, terribly excited to watch him try his first bit of candy.

as soon as the gummy worm is in his hand, he’s picking it up with only two fingers as if it holds some disease, inspecting it.

“i swear, i didn’t poison it.”

loki doesn’t find that very funny, you suppose, but even with the frown on his face, he places the candy in his mouth. the calm expression remains for only seconds longer.

as soon as you see him swallow he’s coughing, gagging across from you, never failing to be as overdramatic as possible.

“that is terrible!” he says, acting as if you had poisoned him.

“you’re mad. gummy worms are delightful,” you say, still excited after having tricked him into trying it in the first place. you take another worm, placing it on your tongue and giggling at the way he flinches while he watches. “would you like another?” you ponder, finger to your chin.

“absolutely not.” he shutters. “mortals are sick creatures, insane with the poison they put into their bodies”

“and you,” you say, moving back to the papers in front of you, satisfied with this small interaction. “are very dramatic.”

*

it’s only a couple of days later when you try again.

loki hasn’t yet forgot the torture you enforced upon his tastebuds, which means he also refuses to let you forget.

mostly, it’s entertaining. incredibly amusing how insistent loki is that you’ve poisoned him, cursed him with “mortal things” and ruined him for everything else that he could possibly encounter.

so of course, you’re trying again.

late last night, after a long day of loki whining about work (and you), it was decided that candy was exactly what the prince needed. something to brighten those terribly blue eyes of his.

and really, you had no other option since he didn’t enjoy the gummy worms that you had so kindly shared with him.

a quick trip to the closest candy store was easy, brief, and you’d obtained exactly what you needed in within ten seconds of entering the shop.

now it was just time to wait.

you smiled at loki when he walked in, called a quick ‘good morning’ surprising him with how early you were, as usually he came in before you even thought of opening your eyes.

you placed the packets of candy on the corner of your desk, setting the trap and waiting for him to notice.

it didn’t take long.

“another treat?” he inquired, saying ‘treat’ as if it was anything but.

you really didn’t know why he found the gummy worms so bad.

“of course,” you answered, not bothering to look up or hide your smile. “none for you this time, unfortunately”

loki laughed, scribbling something down on the paper in front of him (what god needs eyes to watch what he’s doing?) as he stared at the bags on your desk, not uttering a word.

also unfortunately, you knew how high loki’s curiosity level always was, and you knew that eventually, he would want to know more. even if he really despised candy as he said he did.

you continued working, sneaking glances at his desk, watching him do the same thing as you were, eyes on you. you wondered for a moment if he would try and figure out what was on your desk himself. you didn’t quite doubt that he would’ve been able to turn himself invisible, if he wanted.

still though, you said nothing. he didn’t.

“what is it?” he asked, not bothering to indicate what he was talking about. he knew that you knew.

“just a thing i picked up. terribly mortal. definitely poisonous.”

he didn’t appreciate the teasing any more than he’d appreciated the gummy worms. after several, too many, seconds of him glaring at you, you complied.

“they’re called pop rocks,”

loki’s eyes widened, only slightly, before his expression relaxed again. “why are all these things named such unappealing names?”

you laughed, continuing to pretend to write. you were almost sure that the plan was working. “especially unappealing to a god, such as yourself, right?”

“right.”

…and then he sighed. you weren’t sure if it was because he was frustrated, or if he’d finally realized what you were trying to get him to do, but either way, you heard the wheels of his obnoxious chair push back.

and then he mumbled something.

“what, your highness? i didn’t catch that,” you looked up at him, enjoying his scowl this time.

“canihaveone?” he asked again, too quick to catch unless you already knew what he was asking.

“oh?” you mock exclaimed. “one of my mortal treats? the very mockery to your being?”

“they have peaked my interest,” he admitted, now staring at the black packages still on the corner of your desk. “and i’m very masochistic. i enjoy a bit of poison with my work,”

you finally laughed, his truth tied in with the lie breaking the game you were playing. it was simple enough to win, anyway.

“here, loki” you said. still chuckling as you tossed him a packet. you took one yourself, demonstrating how to eat the candy you were more sure he would enjoy.

possibly, your enjoyment in the gummy worms had been the downfall of his. you were a quick learner, luckily enough.

with the popping rocks in his mouth, head thrown back as he tried not to spill them off of his tongue—following your influence —the truth was revealed to both of you as you shared your laughs.

loki, god of mischief, office devil, absolutely adored the pop rocks.

despite the shouts of “these are torturous!” and the declaration that you were the most devious mortal he’d ever met, a far worse villain than he’d ever be, you still knew the truth.

his smile couldn’t just be erased, and the joy you’d felt radiating off of him from across the room was as true as the color of his eyes.

…and if a couple of days later, you noticed a stash-full of his own pop-rocks in one of the drawers of his desk, well. that was just a trick of the eye.

[raksha-the-demon]

@anonykarp

I would LOVE to hear more about your punny werewolf that I am now invested in against my will (curse your writing prowess *shakes fist*) Especially whatever you mean by "normal" werewolf. But no one caught the joke??? Did no one ever READ as a child???

In fairness to the group, I have avoided calling her “Julie of the Werewolves” out loud, as I intended it more as a stealth joke. I’m sure It’ll hit them in the face at some point.

As for Julie being the only “normal” werewolf, she finds out pretty quickly after meeting them all that the Bacchus Bunch is not a regular werewolf pack. For starters, their pack totem is , as their name implies, Bacchus. Yes, that Bacchus. Normal werewolf packs have totems like Stag, Bear, Raven…see a pattern? See how the Roman god of debauchery does not fit that pattern? Yeah. Makes them great at throwing parties, though.

But more importantly, this werewolf pack is only 50% werewolf. The other half consists of Chuck, an incredibly handsome  human mage whose love of costumes is only outdone by his love of yo-yo tricks, and Robyn, who looks like the little gray aliens from Stargate. Because she was grown in a Company lab using the DNA of a big gray alien from Titan.

As for the two werewolves, well they don’t exactly fit the mold either. Fennyl, the pack alpha, can do photosynthesis and may, in fact, be part plant. Meanwhile Jenny, another product of The Company’s R&D division run amok, is actually three separate werewolves sharing a human-suit. Oh, and she’s a reformed man-eater.

They all live in a mansion that used to belong to the vampire Lady Giovanni (whom they killed). The mansion boasts several amenities, including a ghost butler, a library filled with rare texts on spirit magic, an industrial-sized kitchen, an entire servant’s wing, and an unclosable gateway to the underworld. 

Julie learns all of these things while visiting on behalf of the Sept of the Green, which is essentially the local werewolf government. The pack of cubs (that is, newly-changed werewolves) had been put into their custody, and Julie was sent to make sure the cubs are getting the training they need. Or at least, that’s the official story. Unofficially Julie is pretty sure her mentor got her this assignment because the Bacchus Bunch doesn’t have a Philodox, and Julie is a Philodox without a pack, and surely Julie is ready to join another pack by now. 

Well, Auntie was half right: the pack has asked if Julie wants to join. But she’s not ready for that yet, and even if she was, this pack is clearly a train-wreck-in-progress. She’s just going to do her job, check that the cubs are learning everything they need to know to fight the Wyrm, and be on her way. 

But then she gets talking to Jenny about this old book they’re trying to get translated. They got the book from the ghost of Henry Ford in exchange for a police car, Jenny explains, and they know it’s got to be full of useful information. Trouble is, it’s written in a dead language that no one can translate. They do have one lead, though: a mouse spirit that knows the way to a mokole. The mokole are ancient were-crocodile/dinosaur creatures that were blessed by Gaia with ancestral memories, so translating a dead language should be no problem for them.

The only problem is that, like most werebeasts, the were-croco-dino probably despises werewolves. And with good reason, considering ancient werewolves were xenophobic maniacs who tried to eradicate any shapeshifter that wasn’t one of their own. So the animosity is fair. But it does mean that trying to ask one for help is incredibly dangerous. And, as Julie has figured out after spending just a few hours with them, nobody in this pack is particularly good at diffusing situations. They definitely don’t have Julie’s ability to calm a raging werebeast, which is exactly what they’re likely to be dealing with. 

Still, Julie is perfectly content to file all of that under “not her problem”. She’s got her own shit to deal with, thank you very much. But then Jenny starts trying to reassure Julie, saying that if she did tag along to help negotiate with the mokole and things went south anyway, Jenny would protect her. Just like Jenny protects everyone else in the pack. And then it’s not Jenny standing there, but Salieu, and there’s something horrible coming for them both and Salieu is pushing Julie out of the way and--

Julie shoves the memory aside.

Damn it, fine. She’ll help them, if only to reduce the odds that someone else will need to sacrifice themselves like an idiot. But just for this one mission. After that, she’s done with these people. 

[quillsareswords]

could u do a damian wayne x reader where the reader is a titan and damian and her are friends and where the reader has a really crooked smile and crooked teeth and damian just adores it but the reader hates it because everyone makes jokes about it even though they’re just kidding she’s just really insecure like maybe a fellow titan makes a joke about it and damian defends her

Thank you for requesting! This is written by someone who two snagle teeth that sit more like tusks that I despise, so I get where we're coming from here 😔

Prompt List • Masterlist (in bio)

He's always liked your smile. Yeah, it's lopsided and looks more like something torn straight from an evil swamp witch in a storybook, but he adores it.

He loves it because it's yours. Trademark yours. Nobody in the world has a smile exactly like yours. He loves it because it means you're happy. It isn't something torn from a billboard and slapped across someone's face—it's your happiness, in all its realistic and lifelike glory. Nothing any orthodontist can recreate.

He remembers when you first joined the Titans. Barely two weeks after he did, himself. You'd smiled broadly back then, laughing openly at his quips and jokes too dark for you to repeat.

After so long spent around rich people with perfect teeth and catered smiles, your crooked grin stole his heart right out from under him. He hadn't noticed at first, when his heart toppled into your hands: he was too busy admiring your mouth and wondering what'd it could feel like against his.

It took a long time for him to come to terms with his feelings for you. Years, actually. But even while he was trying desperately to suppress an emotional attachment that ran much deeper that just your smile, he couldn't deny himself the pleasure of seeing it. He continued hissing comments in the middle of meetings and pinpointing the things you thought were funniest, cutes, sweetest. Anything to earn a smile.

Unfortunately, he suspects not everybody felt the same glimmering warmth that came with your smile. At the years dragged on, your grin shrank. It was gradual at first, fewer and farther between, until one day they stopped altogether. No more teeth peeking out between the break in your lips. You still smiled plenty, at all his jokes and barbed comebacks, but never showing any teeth. Close-lipped smiles only. When you laughed, it was with a hand or wrist over your mouth. No teeth.

It was late, the night he asked about it. You were sixteen, and he'd given up on shoving away emotions. He still refused to admit anything to you, but he'd allow himself to call you a close friend—one of his two best friends (not that he'd ever said that to your face). It was in San Francisco, and you were laying beside him on the roof of Titan Tower.

You were chuckling still chuckling about watching Beat Boy spurt fruit punch put of his nose when Raven kissed his cheek on a dare (your dare, simply because you wanted to see how hard you could get her to blush).

He was staring up at what stars could be seen through the city's light pollution. He was smiling and listening, but he was only really paying you half his attention. He was thinking about the pictures you'd been in throughout the night, the close-lipped smiles, the hands covering your laughter. That one time you covered your mouth again because you couldn't help grinning at him from across the room as he deadpanned, listening to Dick drawl on about celebrating the successful mission you'd all completed the night before.

He let's your chuckling die down before he rolls his face toward you. "Can I ask you something?"

You look his way, an uncovered, tooth-flashing smile still settled across your mouth, though it starts to fade at the seriousness in his tone.

You still smile for him. Just him.

"Why do you cover your mouth when you laugh?"

Your smile becomes lopsided. You aren't totally sure how to react, and it's written across your face, despite trying to play it off. "What?"

"When you laugh, you cover your mouth with your hand," he reiterates. "And you don't smile around people like you used to."

Your smile droops again. You turn away, to face the stars again. "I dunno. I just do."

He knows there's something else, but he's learned to recognize when you don't want to talk about something. He wants to press you, he wants to figure out what the problem is so he can fix it. Hedyfix all your problems, if he could.

He shoves the thought away before it advances on as to why. "How many Titans can pass out in one room?"

You recognize the tone he uses specifically for a joke. You're already starting to smile. "I dunno, how many?"

"Let's go back inside and find out."

It's a good week afterward that he finally gets his answers. You're sandwiched between him and Raven, focused more on the movie than Beast Boy trying to get Cyborg to spit out his mouth full of water. Some bet they'd made, you've gathered. Why they'd chosen a horror movie is beyond you.

Damian's got more out of you that Garfield has gotten out of his target so far, and it's already halfway through the movie. Raven even giggled at the few she overheard.

It's all fun and games, until Garfield looks up at the screen, and barks out a laugh from the other side of Raven. "Look, it's (Y/N)!"

He's referring to the clown on the screen. The original Pennywise. With rotten, crooked teeth and a chilling grin that probably made kids cry.

Damian rolls his eyes and scoffs. He turns toward you to snicker something about Gar projecting his own issues, but stops cold when he sees the look on your face.

Your eyes are still on the movie, but they're unfocused and your face is twisted with hurt. You try to wipe the expression away when you realize he's looking.

Oh. That's the problem. He should have guessed. Suppose he was too caught up in his own opinion to really consider what any ignorant rodent might think or say about you.

Cyborg groans something, completely unintelligible with a mouthful of water, but it sounds like it was supposed to be scolding. Raven doesn't seem to have heard it.

There are tears in your eyes when you absently scratch the side of your arm and stand up. "I'll be back," you brush off with a forced half smile that's meant to look playful, but comes off pained. You make for the kitchen too quickly to be subtle.

Damian watches you go, but his attention hones on Garfield the moment your out of sight. The green boy is still staring questioningly at Cy's glare when Damian whacks him with the remote.

He swears, reaching up to rub where the hard plastic made contact, turning to tell Damian off and to make him pick up the batteries that came flying out, but Damian's on him first.

"Looks like (L/N), does it?" he growls, jerking his head toward the paused imagine. "Are you always this idiotic or just an asshole?"

Damian watches the confusion turn to pained understanding as he looks between Pennywise and a very angry ex-assassin.

Cyborg spits his water back into the cup on the table. "Dude, come on. That was such a dick thing to say..."

Damian doesn't sit around for the rest. He shoulders the kitchen door open with an empty glass in hand.

You're staring into the yellow light of the microwave, listening to popcorn kernels pop, with your back to him and tour hands braced against the counter.

He hesitates by the door, steps forward suddenly slow and unsure. He glances the sink, remembers the glass, and makes for the faucet. He doesn't want to make it terribly obvious that he knows you're upset, for fear of upsetting you further.

"You shouldn't stand in front of the microwave like that," he grumbles, twisting on the cold water. "Radiation, and all that."

You don't reply. Forty five seconds left on the timer.

He sighs. He pulls his glass from the sink and switches off the water. He leaves the half-full dish on the counter.

You feel his hand on your shoulder without hearing him move. Your head jerks toward him reflexively, but you're quick to turn back to the microwave.

Not quick enough to hide unshed tears and red rimmed eyes.

His hand slides down to your shoulder blade. "Hey. Look at me."

"I'm fine," you mumble, shaking your head dismissively. "I'll be back in a second, just wanted–"

"(Y/N)." His voice is soft in your ears, softer still on an emotional wound. "Look at me."

You release a deep breath, steeling yourself as best you can. His hand is warm on your back, and all you can think about is how badly you want to be held by him. You drop one hand from the counter and turn.

His hand glides with your movement, resting now on your arm. "It was a stupid joke. He's going to apologize. He didn't mean it."

You consider faking another smile and brushing it all off, but you can't seem to bring yourself to do it. Instead, you take a new interest in his shoes. "He wasn't wrong."

"He was." There's enough conviction in his voice to draw your eyes back to his. "He's said enough dumb things to convince mute man glad to be, but that was possibly one of the stupidest."

You chuckle, despite yourself. "That's an awful joke to make," you scold. Still the corners of your lips are tilting upward.

"I know," he admits. "But I'll tell an even worse one if it means you'll smile for me."

Your face falls slack. Eyes wide, surprised.

His free hand finds your other arm. "You have the happiest smile I've ever seen, (Y/N). You don't have to look like a orthodontic aligners commercial to have the prettiest smile in any room. And if anyone tells you otherwise, I'll knock their incisors out."

You've got tears in your eyes again, but your wobbling bottom lip is still tilling toward the ceiling. You sniffle once, shuffling forward just enough to wrap he your arms around him.

His arms come up around you like they've been waiting his whole life for you. And the way you fit against him so perfectly, he wonders if they have.

You bury your face in his shoulder. "Thank you," you mumble against his shirt. "Nobody's ever said that about my smile before."

"No one?" He sounds genuinely surprised, and your body gently shakes hon his arms and you chuckle again.

You pull away slowly, but you can't convince yourself to step away just yet. He doesn't seem to mind, arms still so secure around you. "No. But I shouldn't be surprised," you smile again, wider, "considering you're the only person I've never felt so self conscious around."

He smiles right back. "Good. I couldn't stand it if you tried to hide from me like you do everyone else."

Your teeth disappear again, but it's not behind tight lips and self conscious dread. It's something soft, made solely for him. "No. I don't think I could hide it from you if I tried."

He doesn't remember who moved first. If it was your hands on his cheeks or his arms around your waist, or who leaned and who met them halfway. All he does remember is how many times he imagined tour lips against his, and how many times he'd guessed it all right.

[harrisonstories]

George Harrison holding a t-shirt which says, “Animals are my friends and I don’t eat my friends” with Lakshmi Shankar during the Dark Horse tour. (1974)

George Harrison + politics

“I think about [the war in Vietnam] every day, and it’s wrong. Anything to do with war is wrong. They’re all wrapped up in their Nelsons and their Churchills and their Montys -- always talking about war heroes. Look at All Our Yesterdays. How we killed a few more Huns here or there. Makes me sick. They’re the sort who are leaning on the walking sticks and telling us a few years in the Army would do us good.” (Datebook, 1966)

“He thinks that his, George’s personal taxes are going directly to pay for F111’s. He sees Mr. Wilson, the Prime Minister of England, as the Sheriff of Nottingham, ‘There he goes,’ George said bitterly,  ‘Taking all the money and then moaning about deficits here, deficits  there -- always moaning about deficits.’ In fact, he approves of nobody in authority, religious or secular. These people are called Big Cheeses or King Henrys. They should practice what they preach, and, according to George, they do not. ‘Take  teachers,’ he said. ‘In every class when I was at school there was always a little kid who was scruffy and smelly; and the punishment was always to sit next to the smelly kid. Fancy a teacher doing that.’” (Datebook, 1966)

“I think if somebody can go and buy a crate of whiskey and drink that and be perfectly within the law then I think somebody, particularly within the privacy of his own home, should be able to smoke a marijuana cigarette. You know. I think marijuana is only as bad as an ordinary cigarette, or alcohol or tea or coffee or any of those things. They’re all drugs, all stimulants you know. The thing is to define between something that is merely a stimulant and something that makes your physical body crave for it. There’s no comparison between marijuana and heroin.” (KRLA, 1967)  

“I noticed a police car. It says, written on the door, ‘To serve and to protect’, and that really sort of buzzed me. I was starting to wonder like, who are they serving, and who are they protecting? I mean that’s where it’s really at because maybe they do serve and protect, but you know...themselves or? Like, who? [...] That’s the trick you see. They say, ‘It’s not me. It’s somebody up there telling me what to do,.’ and you can never find like, who is the guy at the top? Because they shift the load, you know? Take a load off Annie.” (1968)

“It’s shocking for anyone to shoot anyone. Some shootings just get more publicity than others. There’s no interest in people who aren’t senators. It’s silly for people to have guns. If they have guns, they’re going to use them, aren’t they? If people get busted for anything today, they should get busted for guns, I think.” (Teenset, 1968)

“[The government] still choose to use the money for military and for weaponry, as opposed to building the inner cities, giving people jobs, or detoxifying the oceans or whatever. I mean it’s just -- it’s in a nutshell greed I think. It all comes down to greed. Y’know industry, commerce, and that.” (RTE, 1987)

“I voted for the Greens because I think it’s more important to um, have a bit of oxygen to breathe. I think that’s one of the most important things, to have something left of the planet.” (1987)

“I know it must sound strange from someone who’s made a lot of money out of selling records, but the present yuppie consumerism spurred on by Mrs. Thatcher and her friends is absolute anathema to me. It is, I believe, amoral and ultimately very corrupting. I despise the politicians -- and there are so many of them like this in the present Government -- who urge us on to new heights of consumerism, who elevate the yuppie to the ultimate pinnacle as the ideal to be copied by all. This idea that profit and the private sector must rule everything is just crazy to me. I don’t accept it at all.” (1987)

“You see, even in a place like Henley-on-Thames there are youngsters who are not from particularly well-off families. Some of them live on the borderline of real poverty. And there’s a limit to how much there is for people like that to do. For some time we ran a special scheme of subsidised ticket prices for such young people and it worked wonderfully well. We asked Michael Heseltine, our local MP, to ask Nicholas Ridley, the Secretary of State for the Environment, to make the cinema a listed building. It is a period piece. But Heseltine said to me, 'It is not a good enough building to save, you know, and quite honestly, George, you cannot stop it from being knocked down.' So I said, 'Well, there is too much traffic coming over Henley Bridge anyway, why don’t we knock that down and make a nice big, wide, concrete one? In principle, I don’t see that there’s any real difference.' And he said, 'George, don’t be so ridiculous! That bridge is an old structure and is so much part of Henley, it’s important to Henley!' I replied, 'But if you take the cinema away, then something else, and then something else, then you slowly change the town. The cinema is just as important as the bridge in that respect, and the cinema has a social function that no bridge can ever have.' And, you know, Heseltine looked at me as if to say, 'Shut your mouth, you ignorant Liverpool git!'” (1987)

“If you have a leader who hasn’t got himself together, then you can’t do anything. Then you see like Richard Nixons, Ronald Reagans -- all these kinds of people are empty. They’re just like a shell with darkness and emptiness inside, and they’re out there leading countries.” (1988)

“[Piggies] was social comment, and it’s still the same today. Especially now, with glasnost, and communism going away, they’ve got to have a good reason not to give that money to the poor, or redivert it into helping the planet become safe and unpolluted.” (Musician, 1990)

“The poison is everywhere, on your potatoes, tomatoes — not to mention the air we breathe. The basic problem is that the agrochem­ical industries have a stranglehold on the government. They’re all in cahoots [...] What we need is an honest army that goes around busting those guys, because they’re the ones ruining this planet. But what you find is that the people causing the most environmental damage are the industrialists. And the Dow Jones people. Buy buy buy! Sell sell sell! This madness that Reagan and Thatcher created, this idea that everyone is much better off now, everyone is more in debt, there’s more concrete, we’ve sacrificed the planet for the motor car.” (Musician, 1990)

"I earn enough money to be a conservative, but I am not willing to give up my principles.” (El Pais, 2000)

[sybilmarlowe]

Since I joined the One Piece fandom, I was asked different times which character I ship with Doffy the most. Given I'm usually into self insert things, I'd firstly go with "my OC, of course 😛"... But let's talk about what I think of Doffy's most famous ships 😁

DISCLAIMER: all of what follows is TOTALLY my own opinion, don't want to judge anyone who thinks differently than me. OP is a fictional world made of fictional characters and anyone can ship whoever they likes!

So, here's the ships:

Doffy x Viola

Ok, let's start with what many people's don't want to hear: this ship is canon. Yeah. Like it or not, it's a matter of fact.

I honestly like them together, they're a weird couple but somehow they work. I like to imagine how could have been the dynamic between the two of them, and I'm more than sure there was nothing abusive from Doffy's side. I mean, sexually at least. I agree with the fact destroying one's whole life and Country is pretty abusive, but I'm quite sure the feelings between Doffy and Viola have been real for a while. Maybe the concept could sound trivial, but no one chooses who to love and Doffy has many characteristics which may definitely make a person fall for him. Not totally sure HE has ever truly loved her, but I like to think so. After all he does have a weak side and Viola might have been one of the few (even thanks to her powers) who managed to see it and knowing him deeply. This surely strenghtened their bond and it might have finally resulted in love...

My vote is a 8/10

Doffy x Cora

This is incest. I know. And it's indeed problematic and controversial. Irl a thing like this isn't exactly acceptable.

BUT as I told before, OP is pure fiction, so... I have to say quite like them tbh. In my opinion, as long as a relationship is adult and consensual there's nothing deeply wrong in it IN FICTIONAL WORLDS. (I know, there are fanfictions in which their relationship is abusive, but since we’re talking about headcanons here I like to think it’s not). Have you watcher GoT? Cersei and Jamie were one of the best written pairings in the whole series, the same goes for this situation imo, we have all the conditions to make this ship a sensible one.

They’re a realistic couple cause they went through a lot of difficulties together and, even if they chose different paths of life, their bond is very very deep. Their love is a desperate one, like “you’re the only one in this world I can REALLY trust”. This from both sides. The difference is that Cora is a pure person who just want to love and being loved while Doffy... well, he’s not exactly mentally healthy and he’s like “all or nothing”.

A lot of angst and stuff, of course, for this reason my vote is 7/10

Doffy x Crocodile

I’m sure someone out there is going to want my head for what I’m about to write, the DoffyxCroco fandom is huge after all... but... 

I don’t like this ship at all. 

Given one can ship two people with no reason or just because they wear matching colours and look good in fanarts (?) imo DoffyxCrocodile has no sense. They interact, yeah, but nothing about their dialogues or shared scenes makes me thing they could be a good couple. Even that most famous encounter at Marineford which made fanpeople scream... They looked just like contenders who quite disliked eachother, nothing less and nothing more :/ and Doffy saying “I’m jelous!” just gave me the same vibes of a childish sacrastic way to piss off a person, pretty much like the stupid classic “you fight like a girl!”. 

They’re aesthetically beautiful, nothing to say, they’re both among the most handsome characters in OP  and have a similar story, so I’m not saying I don’t understand the reasons of those who ship them... Just... I want ships to be stronger and more credible than this :/

6/10 just because they look good in fanarts XD

Doffy x Luffy 

This is pretty diffused, but..... why. 

I mean... what happened between the two of them which could have made them fall for eachother?? D: Have you ever tried to date a person after trying GearFourthPunch them out of the troposphere? °A° (Also, Luffy could LITERALLY be Doffy’s son. This is weird. Not the weirdest thing, but still.)

Srsly... If you like them together I ask you to tell me which dynamics are there behind this ship. Cause I really can’t see WHERE do you see even a little trace of feelings between the two of them D: 

Sorry D:

3/10 

Doffy x Law

Gods, yes. YES.

This ship HELLA works from every single point of view. Doffy and Law are two of the most (if not THE MOST) well written characters in the whole series. They have a complete and complex background, a deep and multifaceted personality and, above all, an extremely strong bond. 

Ship them or not, they’re literally OBSESSED by eachother for different reasons.

 Law is the ONLY man Doffy considers almost his equal, he thinks he’s like the only person worth being his right hand man and I’m quite sure he’s galvanized by the idea Law is the one who’s gonna sacrifice his life to make him immortal. Like... a great life to complete an even greater one? This is insane. And yet beautiful. 

On the other hand, Law’s thoughts have been completely centred on taking revenge on Doffy for 10 years. Like, he was literally obsessed by that man, consumed by the hate he felt for him which obscured anything else, even his maniacal good sense in the end. 

Turning this all into a tragic and tormented love story is as easy as drinking water. A long-term reciprocal hate mixed with a deep admiration for eachother (even from Law’s side, after all Doffy was the one who thaught him almost... everything?) which slowly turns into something terribly different. Imagine the tension between two arch enemies who have to admit their hate melted into passion... and yet still have this latent feeling of wanting the other’s death.......

Don’t know what’s your opinion about this kind of stories, but for me, the self proclaimed Queen of Angst, in love with the most tragical Theatre and Literature... THIS IS GOOD STUFF. 

10/10 HANDS DOWN.

Doffy x Trebol 

What tHE ACTUAL F***K. 

-10/10 

Doffy x Bellamy

Please, no. 

Alright, I hate Bellamy. He’s exactly the kind of character I find terribly pathetic and incomplete. He barely has a personality of his own, he’s a wild fanboy with nothing original (not like Barto. Barto is the best fanboy ever. All my love goes to Barto.). 

Now, he spent all his 34 years of life trying to... imitate Doffy? And yet he doesn’t even manage to truly understand him. So he’s worse than a fanboy, he’s attracted to the idealization of a man who’s not even half of the things he expects him to be. This is sad. Really sad. And call me a sadist, he deserved being humiliated imo. Maybe this helped him open his eyes and getting a life. Seriously. 

It goes without saying I totally can’t see how a relationship between him and Doffy could work. Doffy despises him, the only kind of plot this thing could have is a quite abusive one :/ and since I deeply dislike abuse.... no. This ship is totally out of question.

0/10

Doffy x Monet

This is another ship which barely touches the canon. I sincerely think the "love" between the two of them is pretty much unilateral. Doffy respects Monet, he deeply appreciates her abilities, intelligence and loyalty, she's clearly among his closest subordinates, but... He doesn't love her in a romantic way. As for Monet, she's totally in love with him, she'd kill and die for him. And in fact that's what she does in the end.

Monet is not among my fav characters, but I still feel quite sorry for how things went for her. She gave her everything away for a helpless, almost obsessive, love.

If something between the two of them really happened for real, I think it was merely physical.

For this reason, tough I have to admit they'd actually look beautiful together, I can't ship them :/

5/10

Doffy x Vergo

Ok, I dislike Vergo. He's quite a flat character imo, don't even like his design 😅 I don't ship him with Doffy for this simple reason, but being honest they could perfectly work as a couple.

Vergo was among Doffy's very first "real friends", he was among those who were considered a family by him and, most importantly, he was the only one around his same age. They literally grew up together, likely supporting each other, and I wouldn't be honest if I said this has no chance to be a good assumptipn for a love story. A quite simple and basic one, if you want, but it's the most realistic kind of bond two people can make.

Still not shipping them, my vote is a honest 7/10.

Guess that's all?

Let me know what do you think about this 😆 do you agree with my votes? Or there are some points you totally disagree with?

Well, anyways. I had fun 😂

[lovelylou]

since 2020 is almost over, i thought i’d share (some of) my favorite fics that made my 2020 a lot better.

[note: not all of these fics were written/published in 2020, although most of them are, there are some that are older, but that i’ve read or re-read this year]

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tastes like summer, smiles like may by outropeace

“Is this true?” Harry grabbed the beta by the shoulders. “Bryce, where did you hear that?”

“There’s rumors going around the castle,” he smirked. “stories about his beauty and his cold attitude. They know he is an omega only because of his scent, but he has never had a heat.”

“Do you know what this means?”

Bryce smirk grew into a big smile. “He can’t give you an heir.”

A cold prince, an alpha with nothing left to lose and a kingdom with a secret.

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But It's Useless by thinlines

“Hey.”

Louis was even hallucinating now. He closed his eyes.

“Hey, you.”

He chuckled wetly, head still leaning against the door.

“Can you get out of the way? You're blocking the door.”

He exhaled sharply before slowly turning around. His eyes fixed onto muddy Nike trainers before it traveled up to impossibly short jogging shorts. The yellow color was atrocious, simply ghastly.

“What happened to being polite, Harold?”

OR Omega Louis would never guess that he would be trying to hack into Alpha Harry's Wifi. That is until everything changes when he tries to get to know his enemy.

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haunted by the ghost of you by missandrogyny

He’s tall—that’s the first thing that registers in Louis’ head when he spots him, standing with his hands behind his back. Tall, with curly hair, staring at them with the widest, greenest eyes Louis has ever seen. And wait, are those dimples? Louis didn’t know ghosts could have dimples.

Because he’s definitely a ghost, this boy. At first glance he looks normal, standing there pigeon-toed in a band shirt (The Ramones, Louis can’t help but note incredulously), dark jeans, and some boots, with rings on both hands, and tattoos littering his left arm—a sleeve made of anchors and names and roses and other completely unrelated things. But he’s also a little bit translucent; if Louis focuses, he can see the outline of the furniture, the design of the wallpaper through him.

“Hi,” the boy—the ghost—says to Louis. His face shifts; somehow his dimples dig deeper into his cheeks. His eyes flit from Louis, to Niall, to Liam, and finally to Zayn, and his face goes from shocked to elated. “I’m Harry.”

At in that exact moment, standing between three of his best friends and staring at a (quite handsome) ghost, Louis can only think one thing.

Nick Grimshaw was right.

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On the Edge by zanni_scaramouche

Figure skating is as vital to Louis’ identity as his DNA, so when his skates go missing right before the last Olympics of his career there may be a meltdown only vanilla bath salts can fix. Well, that and the stupidly charming hockey player he met on the plane.

Harry’s too old to be the wonder kid and too young to be taken seriously in the NHL. As an alternate thrown in at the last second, he fights to prove himself on the national team at the largest sporting event known to man. Or he will, once he gets off this flight and can focus on something other than the fussy figure skater and his stunningly blue eyes.

A baggage mix-up skews both of their perfectly laid plans for gold, forcing the two to work together as the clock clicks towards the minute they’re expected to shine on centre ice.

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even the best laid plans by falsegoodnight

“Anyways,” Louis stresses, narrowing his eyes, “just let me say it and then rate how terrible of an idea it is on a scale from one to ten.”

“Alright,” Zayn agrees, sitting up expectantly.

“I want to ask Harry Styles to take my virginity,” Louis blurts, holding his hands out for emphasis.

The way Zayn’s eyes bulge is almost comical. “Negative infinity,” he says, voice choked. “Negative infinity times negative infinity.”

“Technically, a negative times a negative is -”

“Really negative infinity,” Zayn corrects himself, shaking his head wildly. “Louis, what the fuck?”

-

Or, Louis wants to have sex with someone and decides Harry is the perfect alpha for the job.

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The Compulsion to Find Love by Toomanytears

The most prestigious English third-level institution, Candling University, accepts omega students for the first time and Louis Tomlinson applies with bright eyes and brighter ambitions. There he encounters personal obstacles, traditional mindsets and a beautiful boy who inverts every prejudice Louis has ever known.

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Mine Would Be You by crinkle-eyed-boo (KimmieRocks)

Louis blinks his eyes open, his eyelids fluttering as the room swims around him. He takes several gulps of beer once he confirms that he’s definitely not hallucinating, that the very first portrait Harry Styles ever painted of him is hanging on that wall.

Louis stares at the wall, his heart jackrabbiting in his chest as he realizes that there’s not just one painting of him, there’s five, the portraits lined up like they’re some sort of storyboard depicting the rise and fall of his deepest love. His greatest heartache. A pain that cut him so deep that he left the fucking country, severing all ties with his life in New York, now suddenly surrounding him as if he’d never left.

Fucking shit motherfucker fuck.

Louis returns to New York City five years after he left it – and the love of his life – behind. He didn't intend to see Harry again, but fate has a funny way of pulling them together, whether they like it or not. After making a begrudging truce, they both start to wonder: Would it be so bad if history repeated itself?

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UN(RE)SO LVED. by daddyharrie

The ghoul boys are back, but this time around there are some unresolved feelings involved. Harry is a skeptic, Louis is not. Watch them go on their ongoing investigation into the question: are ghosts real?

Or, BuzzFeed Unsolved AU.

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Hate to Smoke (Without Me) by louhazpride

“For fuck’s sake,” he huffs, grabbing the pillow and pulling it on top of his head in an attempt to block out the banging coming from the other side of the wall.

It’s the third time this week that his neighbour has woken him up in the middle of the night with his little ‘rendezvous.’ Honestly, he's quite sick of it. There’s only so much sex he can bear to hear in one week and he has already hit his limit. If he wanted to listen to someone having sex, he’d turn to porn.

As if the noises weren’t enough, Harry immediately becomes aware of the faint aroma of weed filling his flat.

“I’m going to murder him.”

Sleep. Harry just wants one good night of sleep. However, his neighbour has a thing for headboard-banging-against-the-wall-sex every night. After a secret set-up and a bet, Harry may finally get the sleep he so much desires.

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Three Days in February by writing_practice

“We have to get out of here, outside,” Harry whispered, turning his hand in Louis’s grip to hold on and pull them both to their feet.

“And how do we fucking do that?” Louis hissed, carefully rising and pulling Harry to his feet before Harry could do it. His gaze darted to the front then back of the arena. “None of the doors are where they’re supposed to be.”

“What?” Harry looked around again too, couldn’t see any doors, only knew that they must be there, somewhere. “How do you know?”

Confusion slid over Louis's features.

“Because we’ve been here before, Haz. It’s the O2.”

The show. It must be the first night of their tour. They were too late; they were out of time.

Louis is cursed after a night out with the lads and the five have just three days to figure out what happened and how to break it before Harry and Louis both lose their sanity and maybe something more. Louis can hear everything Harry thinks and Harry isn’t sure he can keep his feelings for Louis a secret from his own mind.

Ridiculous amounts of banter and angst, a lot of Harry and Louis alone together, a healthy dose of OT5 friendship, and one very magical weekend.

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Coming Up For Air by stylinsoncity

It's a long plane ride to LA but sitting beside Harry makes time fly.

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I'd Give Up Everything Just Ask Me To by Rearviewdreamer

They don't usually exchange Christmas gifts, but this year is different. This year, Louis knows exactly what he wants to put under the tree to make his boyfriend smile. He just doesn't know how he's going to get it.

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bruise you like a peach by falsegoodnight

There’s two reasons Harry despises Econ.

The first is that it’s boring as fuck. The second reason is a bit more personal, a bit more focused in a way. As in it’s focused on one specific thing, or in his case, person.

His name is Louis Tomlinson.

-

Alternatively titled 'the peach fic.'

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Sometimes You Just Know by 2tiedships2

“Dear diary. Today is going to be a good day, and here’s why...”

“What are you doing?” Louis mumbled as he bit into a piece of toast.

“It’s been almost two years and today Harry Styles and Louis Tomlinson reunite. Louis is very excited about…”

Louis’ chair screeched along the kitchen floor as he flew up out of his seat, quickly grabbing the paper from Niall’s grasp. As he scanned the page he found it amounted to lines of nothing.

“What is this?” Louis asked again. “We’ve discussed how Harry Styles will never be spoken of in this flat. I don’t care how long it’s been.”

Niall snatched the paper from Louis and proceeded to draw a line across the page before writing.

“Today is the day that he-who-shall-not-be-named is coming to dinner.”

Or the one where Harry and Louis don’t believe in soulmates… until they do.

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eyes off you by soldouthaz

“Just promise me you’ll do whatever it takes to keep us all safe while we’re in there,” Liam says.

Through the crack in the door, Louis can just barely make out the broad curve of Harry’s back, the slope of his curls as they tumble down all sleep-soft and lazy, and the sharp twist of his arm - all leading down to where he’s got his pointer and middle finger crossed over each other behind his back.

“I promise,” he tells Liam firmly, “I promise.”

--

or; a charlie’s angels inspired fic where louis is the brains, harry is the charm, liam is the muscle, and niall drives the getaway car - and zayn is there, too. sometimes.

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Welcome to The Rivalry by 2tiedships2

“Welcome home!” Niall yelled, clapping his hands in excitement. “Isn’t it great?”

Louis looked between Niall and the house, unsure how to respond.

“I don’t understand,” Louis finally managed to say. “Aren’t we a little old to be living so close to campus?”

Niall scoffed. “You’re only twenty-four for fuck’s sake. There is still plenty of partying left for us to do. What better place than one street over from where a car was set on fire after the Michigan game last year?”

“Is there proof of that? Did the car have Michigan plates or something? Is there a photo I can send in a DM to Wolfie?”

As if on cue, a Twitter notification popped up on Louis’ Apple watch. He had tweeted again.

Or a reverse You’ve Got Mail au inspired by the Ohio State/Michigan rivalry. Featuring duplex neighbors, (kind of) enemies to lovers, and an anonymous Twitter feud between omega Louis and alpha Harry.

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Cold Little Heart by seducedbycurls

Louis is a soft omega with an abusive past and an alpha child

A few months after getting a divorce, Louis meets Harry, an ex-military alpha wolf that offers him something -odd.

In exchange for teaching him how to cook, Harry will babysit his son, Abraham

Louis really could use the help.

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[ordinaryschmuck]

What I Thought About "Escaping Expulsion" From The Owl House

Salutations random people on the internet who most likely won’t read this. I am an Ordinary Schmuck. I write stories and reviews and draw comics and cartoons.

Do you wanna know what I love the most about The Owl House? The writers waste no time getting to the good stuff.

Things like Willow working things out with Amity, Lumity, Lilith's redemption, and Luz's fight with Belos are stuff that most shows would drag out and wait upon using until several seasons down the line. Most of them for the final season. And yet, it all happens in the first! The writers somehow knew what the fans exactly wanted and gave them just that before they even had to ask.

Take "Escaping Expulsion," for example, as it has some great plot points and ideas I thought would happen later in the season and maybe even near the end. But it's only episode TWO of the new season, and I'm appreciative of it for that reason alone.

But explaining the good stuff this episode delivers requires spoilers, so if you haven't watched the episode yet (even though you definitely have at this point), I recommend that you do so. Now let's review, shall we?

WHAT I LIKED

Blight Industries: Huh. I'll be the first to admit: I would have never expected that the main reason why the Blights are rich is because of their technological advancements. Large in part of how the Boiling Isles is a fantasy world, and rarely do you see technology taking place in a setting such as that. Still, points for total expectation subversion added with some pretty cool tech, I might add.

Odalia Blight: It's nice to put a face to the name I've grown to hate with a fiery passion. Now I can update my dartboard!

But to tell you the truth, it feels weird saying I like someone so vile. I mean, the woman is a manipulative, smarmy b-word who nearly killed Luz. Anybody who does that last part deserves to go on my s**t list! I despise her with the same fiery passion I've had since "Understanding Willow" premiered...and it's that reason why I like her.

Because here's the thing: Characters and people are two different things. If Odalia existed in real life, she better hope that I never meet her. But as a character whose purpose is to have the audience hate her, she succeeds with flying colors. It's the same reason why I consider it unfair to hate an episode like "Something Ventured and Someone Framed" because Mattholomule exists. I get it but understand that hating him is his purpose. It's the same with Odalia. I love her, but only because I love to hate her.

Alador Blight: Wow. I guess Alador really is the lesser of two evils.

By the way, keep in mind that I said "lesser of two evils" and not "the nice one." I don't care how adorable it is to see him get distracted by a butterfly. He's still an abusive figure who stood aside as Luz fought for her life against the Abomitron and still goes along with Odalia's plans despite how heinous they are. And whenever I remember how he treated Amity in "Understanding Willow" as well--

Also, don't make him neurodivergent so he can seem redeemable. It is painfully obvious that he is just exhausted after hours of toiling away in his lab working on his inventions to the point that his brain is beyond fried.

Now, seeing that I've dismissed the argument about how Alador is the nice one, let's actually talk about his character. Because I can see what Dana Terrace meant when she said that he's interesting. He's not explicitly as awful as Odalia, as he mostly seems to be in his own little world half the time. Despite that, Alador still shows signs of being just as dismissive of Amity in general. You see this as he focuses on how her strength shows signs of Amity being a potential coven leader instead of noticing how his daughter nearly died to his own invention. Alador doesn't manipulate, but he doesn't love his daughter in a way a father should either. I'm very intrigued by this route for his character, and I can't wait to see what is done next with him.

Amity’s Amulet: My heart sank when I realized the true purpose behind Amity's amulet. The thought that Odalia found a way to literally be in Amity's head at all times...I hate that. I mean, I love it because it's A+ storytelling and symbolism, BUT I F**KING HATE IT!

Amity in General: And seeing how we're already talking about Amity, let's dive into the fact that "Escaping Expulsion" is easily her best outing so far in the series. I say this because it really puts to the test Amity's dedication to being a part of the group. You can tell by her expressions and Mae Whitman's performance that Amity so desperately wants to help her friends, but she can't due to being afraid of her mother's wrath. Which doesn't surprise me, given what we know about Odalia so far. But what does surprise me is that Amity stands up to Odalia in this very same episode. I expected it for sure, but most likely at the end of the season, due to most shows dragging out a similar concept for drama's sake. However, as I said, the writers don't waste time giving the fans what they want. So, yeah, Amity defies her mother in the very same episode we're officially introduced to her. And it's totally believable, as Amity has been fighting her parent's control ever since Luz literally showed her the light after "Covention" (click here if you don't believe me). It's yet another impressive showcase of Amity's character development and how she's leagues ahead of other redeemable characters who would go through five more episodes like this before getting to the point.

Luz in General: But enough about Amity. For now, let's talk about the actual best character of the series!

Just like Amity, Luz is on top form in "Escaping Expulsion." She is quick to call 'applesauce' about Odalia and Alador expelling the Hex-Squad and is smart enough to figure out the deal Odalia is worming her way into making. Several people classify Luz as stupid, and while she definitely leaps before she looks at times, this episode proves that Luz isn't going to fall for the sweet talk that someone like Odalia offers. As reckless as she can be, Luz is still intelligent enough to know what someone like Odalia wants and cuts to the chase despite knowing the woman can't be trusted. Still, Luz going through with the deal anyways is fantastic character work for her as it shows her dedication to the people she cares about. It hurts my heart to see Luz get all beat up from Alador's inventions, but her willingness to put up with it for her friends is an act of service I wouldn't have expected from anyone else. "Escaping Expulsion" may be more centered around Amity, but it still proves why Luz earns her spot for one of my favorite characters.

Learning How Glyphs Work: Another solid aspect of The Owl House is that the writers find brilliant ways for world-building and explaining the rules of the Boiling Isles. Take this episode's b-plot, for instance. Eda and Lilith need to learn how to do Luz's version of magic, so having an entire section of the episode dedicated to them figuring it out is a perfect outlet to explain how glyphs work in the first place. Although, I have some tribulations with this subplot that I'll get into with the dislikes. But I still consider this a brilliant workaround to explain glyphs, even if specific executions could be handled better.

The Fairy Pie: Not only is this well-crafted dark humor, and not only is it adorable as hell, but it also shows how Amity has calmed down with her feelings toward Luz. She still blushes when handing over the fairy pie, but it is certainly more subdued in comparison to "Wing it Like Witches." I like to think the time off from her (and our) favorite weirdo helped cool down those emotions a bit, but that doesn't mean she won't get slightly flustered every now and again. Because as much as I adore seeing cool and collective, I'm still very much a fan of Disaster Amity due to how cute it is.

Principle Bump: "This character is underappreciated!"

"That character doesn't get enough love!"

YOU WANNA KNOW WHO'S UNDERAPPRECIATED AND DOESN'T GET ENOUGH LOVE?! PRINCIPAL GOSH DANG BUMP, THAT'S WHO!

So many kids' shows focus on how educators are the bad guy who treats students poorly because they love seeing children suffer. But that's not Bump! Sure, he made a misstep in "The First Day," but for the most part, he really cares for his students and hopes that they work hard to be their better selves. So when he's forced to send Luz, Gus, and Willow away, he's genuinely saddened by it to the point where he breaks down crying! On top of being wholesome, Bump missing his students is another example that a character shouldn't be written as evil just because they run a school. Sure, there are scumbag teachers and principals out there, but for others, they're a lot like Bump: People who show admiration and respect to their students rather than ridicule because a principle "just doesn't get it." And I appreciate Bump all the more for it.

Gus and Willow: It feels weird that these two basically got sidelined, especially since they have a stake in the plot as well, but it's understandable. "Escaping Expulsion" is clearly more Amity-centered, and with Luz being the main character, it would also be odd if she didn't get more of the focus than her friends. Having them do more would have been great, but what they've already accomplished is pretty decent anyway. They show how much they're on the same page as Luz when trying to figure out a way to sneak back into Hexide, Willow is still the best voice of reason when saying no one will be killed through their plans, and Gus wins the comedic highlights in the episode. While I would have loved that they did more, I'm perfectly fine with what we got. Besides, this is only episode two of Season Two. We got nineteen more episodes to go to focus on these two.

King: Ok, now, this is the version of King I like to see. A character that mocks Eda as if they're equals and acts as a reluctant voice of reason. This episode shows King more at his best and is a major step above what we've seen in "Separate Tides."

Lilith: ...Yeah, f**k it. I like Lilith.

Personally, I would have preferred seeing her dragged through the coals at least a few episodes, but that's judging the show for what I want. Not what it is. And as is...It's fine. Lilith has a great dynamic with the rest of the Owl House, it's honestly adorable seeing her refer to Luz as a teacher, and that scene where she makes presents out of ice for Hooty is all kinds of wholesome. I'd say your enjoyment of Lilith highly depends on how forgiving you are, and if you think her splitting the curse is enough of a gesture, you probably won't mind her as much. The execution of her redemption really could have used more time in the oven, but Lilith is still a decent character regardless, so what's to complain about.

Luz Making the Abomination Have a Cat Face: ...Luz...I f**king missed you.

DON'T EVER LEAVE FOR THAT LONG AGAIN!

(Also, I just love that this is all Amity needed to know Luz was in trouble)

Hop Pop Cameo: He's on the cover of one of the books Willow's dad lifts up. Which is extra cute given how Dana Terrace and Matt Braley (creator of Amphibia) are close friends in real life.

Willow’s Dad Pretending Not to See Anything: One single action defines the type of man this guy is. He's the fun and understanding dad!

Gus, Willow, and Amity Arguing How to Break In: This little quarrel just shows how much these three need Luz. Without someone to keep the peace and bring up compromises, these idiots would have just kept arguing all night.

In addition to that, this clash over ideas acts as a showcase for who these characters are. Willow is careful and smart, so she's going for the option more unlikely to get them caught. Amity is brash and to the point, so she's going for the route that gets them inside as soon as possible. And then there's Gus, who's young and naive, so his plan sounds like something out of a cartoon. The odds of any of these plans working are highly debatable, but seeing these characters with clashing personalities and ideas is a ton of fun to watch regardless.

Edric and Emira Helping: There's not much to add here. It's just another sweet scene that makes me so glad that the writers decided to make Ed and Em more like supporting characters than minor antagonists like "Lost in Language" made fans think they would be.

(Amity throwing the "Hex me" signs back at Edric is just the cherry on top).

“Stay away from my Luz!”: ...What the f**k do you want me to say that? It's f**king perfect!

Luz Catching Feelings for Amity: ...Huh. Neat.

...

...Alright, let's move on.

Luz Wanting to Take a Nap After--Yeah, I can't do it. Not even for the joke.

WAH-HOO-HOO-HOO-HOO! MU! TU! AL! PINING! AH-HAHAHA!

THIS! This is more of that good s**t I'm talking about! Due to being so used to other shows going for the slow burn when writing the endgame romance, I was expecting Luz to catch feelings halfway through the season, even at the end of it. But near the beginning?! That is something I am more than ok with!

And much like Amity standing up to her parents in this episode, Luz catching feelings this early on is totally believable. Many fans have already analyzed how Luz's love language is "Acts of Service," which I'm somewhat sure is romantic gestures. Meaning that I f**king challenge you to find a grander gesture than holding back a literal killing machine while swooping down like a knight in shining armor! Oh, wait, you can't. BECAUSE THERE ISN'T ANY!

But by far, the best--the BEST--thing that can come from this is the dramatic irony! We, the audience, know that Luz and Amity like each other, but they don't. So the constant failings as these two fools try to work out their romantic feelings for one another is something I cannot wait to see in all its glory.

This is one of the best things that could have come out of the episode, and while it doesn't mean Lumity is canon, it is definitely closer than ever before. And I'm excited about all of it!

Luz Wanting to Take a Nap After Getting Home: I adore this because there's no one way that this can be interpreted. Either it's because Luz is exhausted after nearly getting killed for the fifteenth time that month, or it's because Luz is overwhelmed about having a crush on Amity...or both. Most likely both.

Belos Wanting The Abomatrons: Wow, what an ominous ending to the episode! I'm sure it won't come into play at all in the future...The season finale is going to hurt, isn't it?

WHAT I DISLIKED

Gus’ Growth Spurt: I mean...that's just weird. Gus suddenly being almost as tall as the others is a change so jarring that I feel like an explanation other than "witch puberty" is required. I get that they wanted to explain away why Issac Ryan Brown's voice got deep this season, 'cause puberty's a b**ch. But sometimes I feel like it's best to just ignore it, like with how Phineas and Ferb or Steven Universe just goes along with the fact that VAs tend to grow up when the characters themselves remain ageless.

Eda is Kinda Stupid in this One: It's not just me, right? Because I feel like Eda is more careful in the past than she is in this episode. She's been as reckless as Luz is at times, sure, but carelessly screwing around with magic when she has no idea how it works? I can maybe see King doing that, but not Eda. Just seeing her act dumber than usual is something that doesn't sit right with me.

Lilith Explaining Her Glyph Magic: I don't mind this. Glyph magic is pretty confusing, so having Lilith explain how it works to Eda and the audience is something I can understand. My issue, however, lies in how they did this.

Why, in the name of all that is holy, would Lilith explain her theory after the fact. It would be much more natural if she explained while saving King, but doing it after comes across as more forced than it should. Which is a shame because this series is usually on point when explaining how things work in the Boiling Isles.

And...That's about all the complaints I have with this episode. Which are nothing but nitpicks and possibly personal preferences.

IN CONCLUSION

If I'm willing to forgive and forget, I would give "Escaping Expulsion" a well-earned A+. But I'm not, so it's going to be another solid A. And, I mean, if you complain about that...there's something wrong with you.

"Escaping Expulsion" delivers on quite a bit of what fans want to see on top of giving these great character moments that show why we love these casts of oddballs and weirdos. I wouldn't say it reached perfection, but it still carries the winning streak that this new season has so far. Meaning there's no escaping the fact that Season Two is off to a better start than the first.

(Although, the fact that we got two solid As in a row means that we're in for a stinker real soon, doesn't it?)

[the-duke-of-nuts]

The Battle Over Wine

 After 3 months I’ve finally gotten around to finish writing one of the Loceit headcanons/prompts as a oneshot! This is the first fanfic I’ve ever written that’s in actual sentences and not in script form so forgive the MANY grammar mistakes and shitty plot for I am terrible at writing and don’t know how spacing works on Tumblr (*cough* Betas hit me up *cough*) ANYWAYS literally nothing in this makes sense but it’s fanfiction so roll with it. Hope you enjoy I guess!

Prompt/Headcanon by the amazing royalty of Sanders Sides headcanons/prompts @imma-potatoo: Janus and Logan constantly battle over which wine is better (they are both wine moms) Janus says red wine, Logan says white. They can and will get into hour long debates over this

Pairing(s): Loceit, Background Dukexiety

Word Count: 2,400

Warnings: Alcohol, Arguing, Blood mention (Nothing major just comparing the color to wine), Remus being Remus (Let me know if there's anything else)

It was a typical day at the mindscape for the Braincell Gays. They had just finished filming a video with Thomas about helping him with his mental health and his overworking issues. Janus thought both of their inputs and solutions were a success and decided to have some celebratory wine with Logan.

"Today was a success, wouldn't you say darling?" Janus said wrapping his arms around Logan's waist. "I must admit, today was pretty satisfactory, especially since we both helped Thomas with his dilemma and we were both actually listened to for once." Logan replied wrapping his arms around Janus' neck. Janus smiled and pressed a quick soft kiss against Logan's lips to which Logan of course reciprocated. "I say this calls for a celebration." Janus said. "What did you have in mind?" Logan asked, curiously. Janus smirked and summoned two empty wine glasses "I think you know~" "Ah yes, how can I forget your traditional celebratory wine." Logan playfully rolled his eyes. 

"Oh you know you love it".

 "You're correct about that." Logan chuckled.

 Despite both of them having "serious" and "professional" demeanors around the other sides they enjoyed the little moments where they can actually goof off and make each other laugh and smile during their alone time.

 "So, what will it be for the menu for today my love? Will it be the best and most savory of flavors of Roscato red wine, or are we feeling a little fancy and want to celebrate with champagne instead?" Janus asked. "Oh, well I was thinking we should have something far much more adequate like white wine." 

The sound of glass shattering immediately followed after Logan’s response,

 "I beg your pardon?" Janus stared in disbelief trying to process what his lover had just said. Logan, his darling, the light of his life, his beloved, had just disrespectfully claimed that WHITE wine was better than red in his own home! Well, their home and the other sides' home but that's besides the point! This is wine they're talking about here! "Well, I thought I made myself clear but I shall repeat myself, I said that I was thinking we should have something much more adequate than red wine which I suggested white instead." 

Janus took a deep breath in trying to keep his composure

 "Starling?"

"Yes Janus?"

 "You know I love you right?"

 "Of course I do, you show and tell me everyday."

 "Well you're making it reeeeeal hard for me to want to show and tell you right now." 

"Why? Is it because I was simply stating facts that white wine is much more superior than red?" Logan crossed his arms raising an eyebrow. "Those are NOT facts those are lies! Red wine is much more tastier than white wine!" Janus argued. "Yeah, if you have a figurative bitter tooth! Red wine is way too bitter and the sweetness isn't as flavorful as white wine!" Logan argued back. 

"Y'know considering the fact that we have to deal with 4 other nincompoops in this damn house you'd be glad that red wine is stronger than white!"

"Janus, just because red wine contains more ABV than white wine doesn't make it the better beverage!" 

"Oh says who!?"

 "The literal personification of LOGIC and literally anyone who isn't you!"

 "Okay you know what? That's it!" 

Janus has had enough of the ridiculous bickering and decided to take matters into his own hands by summoning himself, his darling nerd, and all of the other sides back in the same exact courtroom him and Patton were in trying to convince Thomas to go to the wedding or callback. 

"We're going to settle this debate once and for all!" Janus dramatically pointed at Logan. "Janus, this is ridiculous! Who exactly are we defending for this to be a courtroom scenario!?" Logan glared at his lover. "Ourselves and the law of wine!" Janus declared. "What the hell does that even mean!?" An annoyed, confused Virgil yelled from the jury box sitting next to Remus and Patton. "Hush Virgil the adults are talking." Janus said not taking his eyes off of Logan.

"We're the same age!" 

"ENOUGH chit chat and questions." Janus made Virgil cover his own mouth growing tired of his complaining and faced Roman "Now, your honor would you kindly read off the charges please?" "Oh, we're doing this again, well alright let's see here uh, The state of Logan Sanders yadda yadda yadda, Janus, prosecuting for the state of Logan Sanders, under oath, information makes that Logan Sanders... Count one: Unlawfully and disrespectfully claimed that one alcoholic beverage was better than the other. Count two: Has terrible taste in drinks but better taste in men. Count three: Being too damn attractive for this world. Count four: Making Janus break two perfectly good wine glasses. Count five: Unlawfully not participate in self care by leaving his books all over the floor whenever he falls asleep while doing heavy research when he's supposed to be taking a break causing Janus to place a bunch of bookmarks in said books and put them away for him." Roman read off the charges Janus summoned him. 

"And how exactly were those last four charges relevent?" Logan asked. "Because they are and you know it! Your honor, continue." Janus said. "Being so charged, Logan Logic Sanders, how do you plead?" "Not guilty." Logan said deadpan. "Count six for being too confident in that answer." Janus coughed out. 

Logan rolled his eyes and shook his head, he didn't know who was more dramatic, Roman or his lovable self care wine loving snake.

"To make this quick and effective we're going to skip the other nonsense and get straight to the point by giving our UNBIASED views to each person and have them decide to see if Logan is truly a horrible wine 'expert'." Janus said as he arrived at the front of the courtroom 

"Alright, fair enough. Prosecution, your first witness." 

"I would like to call Remus to the stand!"

Remus appeared in the witness stand and immediately stood up and was about to jump over it and run "I can't go back to jail!" "Sit down Remus you're not going to- Wait what do you mean back?" Janus looked at him after doing a double take. "Nothing! So uh what's the question?" Remus immediately sat back down trying to change the subject. 

"Alright Remus, red or white wine?" 

"That's it?" 

 "That's it." 

"Alright, uhh hmm..." 

Remus thought about it thinking of the possible outcomes that could happen if he chose a certain answer. Janus noticed him struggling to make a choice and had an idea and smirked 

"You know Remus, if you're having a hard time deciding, just putting this out there, red wine looks like you're drinking blood and I think you enjoy that thought VERY much~" Remus gasped and instantly became excited by the thought "OOH! You're right! I could even add bone shaped ice to give it that realistic crunching sound!" "Objection persuading the witness with a biased opinion." Logan said. "Overruled. It's not really persuading since we ALL know my brother actually enjoys anything gruesome like that regardless." "I sure do!" Remus cackled at Roman's statement. 

Logan sighed a little frustrated, this was going to be harder than he thought.

"I think I rest my case your honor." Janus smirked and blew Logan a kiss as he walked back to his table to sit down. Logan blushed and shook his head to quickly snap out of it and walked to the front and cleared his throat as he adjusted his glasses and tie 

“Remus."

 "Nerd."

 "You enjoy pranking and getting on Janus' nerves is that correct?"

 "Yes that is VERY correct." Remus snickered. 

"And you despise when he forces you to partake in proper hygene as well as making you eat actual ingestible foods unlike deodorant and other non edible items?”

"Yeah."

 Remus crossed his arms hating remembering the times Janus would force him to take a bath and purposely safety locking the cleaning supplies cabinets just so he had no other choice BUT to eat regular food. 

"You also are not how they call a 'lightweight'?"

 "Nope!" 

That was a lie. Remus could drink three cups and he'd already become a drunk chaotic mess.

"Okay, so hear me out here." Logan started and Remus leaned forward becoming interested in what he was about to say. "Remus, white wine is clear therefore you can always "pretend" that you're drinking water so Janus doesn't question it for self care reasons nor harass you about it." 

Remus went wide eyed at the realization and wagged his finger at Logan. "You... I like you... Keep talking."

 Logan smirked, he got Remus right where he wanted him and continued. 

"Also if you were to spill it there would be no noticeable stain therefore making it impossible for Janus to become upset."

"Wow, you make some VERY compelling points Four Eyes."

 "Objection! I don't appreciate you persuading my son with your biased statements by using me as examples." Janus interjected. 

"Janus, Remus is not your son!" 

"You're right, my apologies. I don't appreciate you persuading OUR son with your biased statements by using me as examples."

 Logan rolled his eyes and shook his head not wanting to bother arguing with Janus about his logic. 

"I believe I've made my points your honor." Logan walked back to his table. "Alright, can I go now?" Remus asked. "Almost Remus. We just need to know your final answer, then you may leave and sit back down with the other two." Janus answered. "Okay umm on one hand I very much LOVED Jan's point about how red wine looks like you're drinking blood buuuut I would have to go with Nerdy Wolverine on this one and choose white wine because I enjoy pissing Janus off." 

"Yes!" Logan whispered victoriously to himself. 

"Oh you rat son of a bitch of course you would-"

 "Language!" Patton interrupted. 

"English."

 "Spanish! Now you!"

 "German. No! We're not doing a word association game!" Janus yelled frustrated. "Aw, what's the matter my charming smooth scaled serpent? Realizing you're losing against Logic?" Logan smirked. "NO and don't you dare flatter me using snake related petnames when you're looking like that in a suit!"

 Logan smirked at Janus' flustered expression, "Alright, then bring out your next witness then." "I will! Remus, you can leave now." Finally!" A relieved Remus announced as he summoned himself back at the jury box. Janus summoned Roman to the witness stand wanting to get straight to the point. 

"Roman?"

 "Yes Janaconda?"

 "You're the romantic one out of all of us correct?" 

"Oh my god you already know he is just get to the point!" Virgil yelled from the jury box slowly losing his patience even more. "Since you are an expert on the matter, would you mind sharing with the court which wine do you think is more romantic on a date?" "Oh that's easy, obviously red wine." "Interesting, care to elaborate?" Janus smirked and glanced at Logan. "Of course! Imagine having a romantic candle lit dinner under the stars or a picnic date watching the sunset, red wine gives those beautiful moments of being with your beloved partner a general relaxing and romantic atmosphere and it also tastes marvelous with various different foods. I'm actually quite surprised Specs didn't side with red wine considering it's good for digestion." Roman stated. "Wow, you really ARE a romantic expert! I don't think I have any further questions." Janus smirked and walked back to his table. 

Logan went wide eyed there's no way he can convince Roman, his answer was obviously clear but it's worth a shot. 

"Roman, have you ever considered white wine being just as “romantic” as red?" 

"Not really no."

 "Okay, well uh it can because-"

"Logan, I know you're trying here but trust me I know what I'm talking about. Don't get me wrong, white wine is just as delectable as red but I'm gonna have to side with Janus on this one." Roman interrupted and summoned himself back on the judge chair. Logan sighed and walked back to his table, he knew by the amount of confidence in Roman's answer there was no convincing him. "Fair enough..."

"Alright, Prosecution next witness?" Janus decided to summon Patton in the witness stand next and smiled innocently clasping his own hands together "Patton~" "Uh I know this is probably a really bad time to bring this up now but um I don't really drink wine so I don't really have an opinion..." Patton blushed a little embarrassed. Janus sighed frustrated and put his head down on the podium and summoned Patton back in the jury box "Of course you don't." 

There was only one person left and that person was Virgil, it was 2 out of 2 and his choice would be the one to officially break the tie and put an end to this illogical ridiculous debate trial. 

Janus summoned Virgil in the witness stand " Alright Virgil, what do you think cause I'm sure we all know you don't have an important input." 

"You wanna know what I think!?" 

Virgil was fed up and snapped his fingers causing him and the other sides to appear back at the house and summoned two glasses of wine, one red and the other white. He shoved the glass of red wine in Janus' hand and the white wine in Logan's

 "I think the two of you dorks-" 

"Dorks. Whale penises am I right guys?" Remus interupted snorting. 

"-Should actually ACT like you both have a braincell and never debate about something as stupid as this ever again!" Virgil continued angrily. "Maybe the reason why they both don't have a braincell anymore is because they both fu-" Virgil interrupted his boyfriend from finishing his inappropriate sentence by covering his mouth and dragged him out of the room. Roman and Patton followed them not knowing what else to do. 

The Braincell Gays stood in awkward silence holding their wine glasses realizing their silly little arguement was stupid after all. 

"Truce?" Janus asked raising his wine glass. 

"Truce." Logan smiled and raised his glass as well. 

They both clinked their wine glasses together and drank their wine happily enjoying each other's company and soon made it up to each other by agreeing to have a self care day together the next day.

[agentlemuse]

Written for @doctornineandthreequarters for the @911giftexchange! I hope you like it. 💕

Of Mistletoe & Champagne: A Buddie Fic (General Audience)

You can read on Ao3 or below!

At first he thought it was a fluke.

It’s not as if Eddie was avoiding him last year when Buck was carrying around a sprig of mistletoe. No, Eddie was simply pulled into a hundred different directions with all the excitement of the surprise Christmas party. Perfectly understandable. It also helped that no one else caught Eddie under the mistletoe, no one that he saw anyway.

Besides, it’s not as if Buck had grabbed it for the sole purpose of stealing a kiss. Maybe he had been slightly hoping to finally feel the scratch of stubble against his lips as he pecked Eddie’s cheek, but that was it.

Alas, no such luck.

Which, again, was perfectly fine. No expectations. Woefully pathetic hope, but no expectations. Besides, there was always next year, right?

Cue 2020.

He’s not saying a global pandemic is the universe’s way of messing with him, but he’s not saying it’s entirely out of the realm of possibility. Not that he has thought about excuses to hang up mistletoe for a year, that would be ludicrous. He does have a life and some level of self respect. But the holidays have rolled around, decorations have gone on sale and an occasional thought crosses his mind now and then.

He’s a grown man hoping to land a cheek kiss with the help of a plant. He used to have game, he’s sure of it.

For now he’s just glad he has a mask to hide his irritation when Eddie pulls a raven haired beauty wearing a halo of mistletoe on her head from a stuck elevator. She’s instantly infatuated and of course she is. No mask on earth could hide Eddie’s beauty, the mask only working to draw attention to warm brown eyes framed by unfairly thick lashes.

So when she motions to the mistletoe, leaning in to steal a kiss Buck explains the sudden burst of annoyance in his gut away at the fact she’s not even wearing a mask. In public! In 2020!

He doesn’t bother to hide his sigh of relief when Eddie puts a stop to her with a blunt, “No.”

“Hey, don’t look so glum, Buckaroo,” Chim says, seemingly coming out of nowhere. “They can’t all be in love with you. I’m sure you’ll catch the eye of the next damsel in distress.”

Buck can’t help the bark of laughter that escapes him. Eddie shoots a questioning look over to him which he promptly ignores. At least his crush isn’t painfully obvious. That’s something, right?

So Eddie didn’t want to kiss a random unmasked stranger. Hardly surprising given how seriously he takes everyone’s health. Except, it wasn’t just that. Turns out that Eddie Diaz simply despises mistletoe.

“How can you hate mistletoe?”

“Easy.”

“That’s not an answer,” Buck exclaims, stealing a piece of lettuce from Eddie’s plate and stuffing it into his mouth. “It’s tradition!”

“It’s a stupid tradition.”

“I think it’s sweet,” Buck insists, because maybe despite it all he’s a romantic at heart. Or he’d like to be. He thinks he would be if he just had the right person. “Besides, no one hates mistletoe.”

“I imagine cats do, what with it being poisonous to them and all,” Eddie states dryly, his smirk giving away his amusement.

“So is holly, but I’ve seen you decorate with that,” Buck counters smartly, stealing more of Eddie’s food just to feel Eddie’s knee knock against his whenever he does. “Do you have a tragic mistletoe related backstory? It’s okay, you can tell me. This is a safe space.”

“You’re such an idiot,” Eddie sighs with such impossible fondness Buck swears he can feel his heart swell.

“You like me anyway.” Eddie rolls his eyes, but he doesn’t correct him. Buck will take that as a win. “I will get to the bottom of this!”

“You can try.”

So in the spirit of Christmas he plays dirty and calls Christopher.

“Why doesn’t your dad like mistletoe?”

“Because no one should take romantic advice from a plant,” Christopher says matter-of-factly, just like a kid who has heard this many times before. “Dad says it creates a sense of obligation and pressure and that’s not fair. He’s really big on consent.”

It’s so perfectly Eddie he wants to — he wants to — Well, he wants to kiss Eddie smack dab on the lips. With his consent, of course.

“So a little birdy told me you don’t like taking advice from plants. Does this extend to tea leaves? Because, I’ve read plenty of research that support…”

“Blog posts aren’t research, Buck,” Eddie smiles, bumping his shoulder against his own. “It’s just not for me. If I am going to kiss someone it’s because I want to kiss them. No traditions, no gimmicks. If I kiss someone it’s because I mean it.”

It’s hard to tease him about that. He still does, because Eddie is beautiful all flustered, but it lacks any bite.

So he tucks any lingering daydreams about stealing a kiss away and focuses on what he does have. Being in Eddie’s life, even if only as a friend, is in no way a consolation.

The thing is in his heart he knows he’s not just a friend. Not even the most vicious of doubts that scratch away at his heart and mind can make him truly believe that Eddie is just humoring him, that he’s going to leave him like everyone else. Not when he’s sitting on a couch with his two favorite people, in a house that feels more like home than any place he has actually lived in. Not when Eddie is smiling and carefree in a way few people will ever get to see.

No, he’s more than a friend. He might not have a name for it, but he’d happily die for whatever it is.

This is more than enough. More than he had any right to have ever hoped for.

“I can’t believe you’re still up, little man!”

“I’m not even tired,” Christopher states proudly, polishing off his glass of sparkling cider.

“I am,” Eddie says beside him, not even bothering to stifle a yawn.

“That’s because your dad is old,” Buck whispers conspiratorially, loud enough so Eddie is sure to hear him. Christopher is giggling his agreement, much to Eddie’s mock dismay.

“Says the man with a gray hair.”

“It wasn’t gray! It was the lighting!” Buck wants to be outraged, but it’s hard when Eddie is laughing so hard he snorts. It’s a stupid ridiculous sound that he needs to hear again as soon as possible. They’re only a glass into the bottle of champagne, but Eddie’s cheeks are delightfully flushed, making his sharp smile seem even whiter than normal.

The fluttering in his stomach has nothing to do with the champagne.

He loves this man.

It should be a scary thought, but it’s one that has been lurking for awhile, burying itself into the very marrow of his bones. Evan Buckley is in love with Eddie Diaz. Stupidly, recklessly, hopelessly in love with him.

“Do I have something on my face?”

“What,” Buck asks, scrambling to refocus after being caught lost in thought.

“You were staring at me,” Eddie points out, entirely correct.

“I was not,” Buck bluffs, which Eddie clearly realizes but fortunately time is on his side as he’s spared by the countdown beginning on the screen.

Christopher is practically shaking with excitement as the numbers go down. Soon they’re all shouting in unison: “3...2...1...Happy New Year!”

Eddie grabs Christopher up in a tight hug, before grabbing Buck by the arm to drag him into the hug. Christopher wiggles out of their grasp, declaring he needs to tell Henry the hamster Happy New Year with a burst of energy that has Buck feeling old for a half a second.

“Happy New Year, Buck,” Eddie says softly, reaching out to cup his cheek and—

Oh.

He’s kissing him.

He tastes of champagne and something he can’t quite place, soft lips warm and plush against his mouth. He’s kissing him. He’s kissing him. And it’s...it’s...it’s what people do on New Year. It’s good luck or something. That’s all.

“I thought you didn’t like kisses based on tradition,” Buck says as he reluctantly pulls back, his voice so breathless he barely recognizes it as his own.

“I don’t.”

“But you—“

“Buck,” Eddie interrupts gently, his name sounding as sweet as honey coming from those lips. “If I kiss someone it’s because I want to kiss them.”

Oh.

Well.

This was promising to be a very good year.

[sunset-telepath]

Why I hate Ro

So, I was asked to explain why I hate Ro. And I’ve been compilating several arguments that I’ve heard and written myself. And I’d like to put a disclaimer here - it’s not because she’s this “sokeefe idol.” It’ just... her character and what she does in support of sokeefe.

Disclaimer: I’m condensing several conversations that I, JaxTheShade, and [Redacted due to them not wanting to be credited] had on the wiki about a month ago. Around 40% of these ideas are mine, 40% are Jax’s, and 20% are [Redacted]’s.

Right off the bat, she’s a misandrist. She quite literally calls boys as stupid as amoeba in Legacy. You can say that that was a joke, but it’s not funny. It’s not okay to blatantly call anyone or generalize any group stupid. It’s not ok. It’s the exact same thing as saying that women belong in the kitchen or that blacks are criminals. It’s not ok. It’s disgusting, despicable, and repugnant behavior.

In the Flashback Short Story, she objectifies Sophie as a prize for Fitz and Keefe to fight over. What the actual f***. That is not acceptable behavior under any circumstances. It’s repugnant, disgusting, detestable, and f****** evil. Treating any person as a prize to fight over is textbook objectification and it is blatantly evil. It is not ok. And it’s disgusting that this narrative has leaked into some of the fanfics that I’ve read. THIS IS NOT ACCEPTABLE UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. IT IS NOT EXCUSABLE. IT IS EVIL.

She flat out bullies Fitz. She alludes to him being a nasty microbe in Legacy. She ridicules his desire to perfect himself. There is nothing wrong with being or trying to be perfect. Don’t push yourself too hard trying to be perfect, but if you should always strive to be better (and if you’re naturally talented like Fitz is, achieve your dreams. Fulfill your potential. Ignore the haters). She mocks and bullies him, calling him names and ridiculing his desire to be perfect. Newsflash: There’s nothing wrong with trying to be perfect. Who the hell is Ro to decide how perfect someone can be? Who the hell does Ro think she is? As a perfectionist myself, I despise Ro and her adversity to perfection. It’s not her place to decide how perfect a person can be. I admire Fitz simply shrugging her off and not letting her flat-out abuse get to him. It’s the proper way to deal with people like her.

Her entire character can be summed up as a chronic-complainer who ships Sokeefe. Shannon basically turned the Instagram Fandom into a character and made it Keefe’s Bodyguard. She never confesses to making mistakes and she’s never humbled or knocked down a peg. 30% of her dialogue can be attributed to complaining about sparkles or “elf-land,” 20% of it can be attributed to her flat-out bulling Fitz, and 50% of it can be attributed to her pushing Sophie and Keefe together. None of the characters like her. The other bodyguards detest her, Bo wants to kill her, Fitz thinks that she’s awful, Sophie is embarrassed by her, and Keefe wants her to shut her mouth.

She’s blunt, she’s rude, and she’s just awful. She interferes with a relationship that is none of her business. She has no regard for the emotional abuse that she inflicts. Ro and Keefe are very similar, and clash often. Ro always wins, however, either because she’s stronger than him or because she can emotionally manipulate him. (These sound like big claims now, but they’re backed up later)

Ro dismisses Sophie by saying that “blondie doesn’t know what she feels.” And it’s disgusting. She’s objectified by “blondie” - a term focused on Sophie’s appearance rather than by her personality. She’s Sophie Elizabeth Foster, not “blondie.” She dismisses Sophie as naïve and disregards her feelings by saying that Sophie’s doesn’t know what Sophie feels.

~The Following Section was directly quoted from JaxTheShade because he summarized it so well~

Well...no, Ro. She does have an idea of what she feels. In fact, she was ecstatic and perfectly fine with dating and eventually sorting out her issues with Fitz until you started "hinting" about Keefe. Sophie does understand her feelings - and those feelings led her to Fitz. And even if she does have some underlying issue about who she likes (which has admittedly been hinted at), it's up to her to figure it out. Not a brash ogre bodyguard who scoffs at the notion of the Elvin culture and thinks she has a right to intrude in a teenage relationship she isn't apart of.

And Fitz...well, I'm sure Ro doesn't hate him. But she's pretty close to--that's not hard to deduce. Because Ro has ever bothered to pay attention to and sympathize with Keefe ( and yet she still finds a way to neglect his feelings ), she hasn't the slightest inclination of who Fitz is. So, like most people, she decides to consider him "the opposing candidate" in the love triangle and never look past the surface of Fitz, just calling him "Captain Perfect" and thinking that he could never be right for Sophie because he's competing against Keefe. 

Sometimes I wish someone, anyone, would call Ro out for amount of sheer insults she layers on Fitz, whether he's there or not. Although most of the time it's done behind his back--what a surprise. 

I mean, look at this:

She slyly calls him a 'nasty microbe'. And while some have argued that she wasn't calling Fitz this, she was very clearly expressing her disdain for Sophie's favourite colour being teal--and, by proxy, calls teal things 'nasty'. 

“[...] But I thought it was only right to save your imp from being sparkle-fied—and I was going to be nice and turn him your favorite color. But apparently your favorite color is teal—and yeah, yeah, we all know why. But, um, do you realize how many of the nastiest little microbes are that color?” She shuddered. “I couldn’t do that to you—or the little dude. [...]”

Ro also calls him "Captain Perfectpants" and openly admits that Fitz would have problems with all the time Sophie is spending with Keefe. Essentially admitted but disregarding how upset Fitz would be--because who cares about Fitz's feelings when Keefe is having emotional turmoil? And as a little bonus, she also pulls her classic, "I can't take this anymore! I simply have to intervene in this situation of which I'm not apart of!

"Ro snorted. “Of course he would! He’d be super, super jealous!”

“Don’t,” Keefe told her.

“No—I can’t take it anymore!” Ro stalked toward Sophie and tapped her on the nose with a calloused fingertip. “I repeat: Yes, your Captain Perfectpants would be jealous! He scraped together the courage to get all share-y about his feelings, and now you’re ignoring him, and being all mysterious about why, and telling everyone who asks that you’re not dating him. And I’m not saying that’s a bad call. Trust your instincts! Hopefully they’ll lead you out of the oblivion. But in the meantime, count on your teal-eyed Wonderboy feeling a little insecure, particularly if he finds out you’re spending lots of quality time with other dudes. And you know what? That’s good for him. We all know that boy could use a little help in the humility department. So make him sweat a little. And you”—she spun back toward Keefe—“need to stop being so afraid.”

And those are just two instances, of which I can search for plenty more. 

Ro is not a good person. She's a rebellious princess who ultimately works for her own gain. She thinks she's got it all figured out with Keefe, and decides that, since he shared his story of liking Sophie, she'll take it upon herself to get them together no matter what. 

And I mean 'no matter what'. She has put down Sophie for liking Fitz, interrupted conversations so she can drop hints about Keefe's feelings against his will, and made fun of Sophie for being oblivious--even going to the extent of getting fed up with and blaming Sophie for her oblivion "becoming less and less cute".

She's also tried to actively break up Sophitz and push together Sophie and Keefe. She's insulted Fitz and holds a very hostile disposition towards him simply because he's "perfect boy" who's against the Saint Also Known As Keefe. Ro tries to subtly force Sophie's feelings for Fitz out of her while dropping in some "isn't Hunkyhair so great?". I wouldn't for a second put it past her to succeed in shutting down as many Sophitz moments as possible all so she can continue to ignore the pleas to stop and the embarrassed faces surrounding her. 

And her excuse?

"It's the only fun she gets to have here in Elf Land".

She isn't apart of this relationship. She isn't affected by this relationship. She's only seen one side of this relationship, and uses that to base her opinions of the other two. Which is a terrible idea considering that leads to opinions like "Okay, well that other boy is awful because he's the competitor, and that girl must like the boy because the boy likes her, and sometimes she acts shy around him, and that's totally how relationships work".

Ro has absolutely no excuse for the amount of hurt she's inflicted on all three of these teenagers.

And yet she's regarded as a saint amongst all, while people like...say, Alden ( who made mistakes, but ultimately went about it in a calmer, gentler, and more well meaning way--as well as having much more justification and reasoning behind his actions ) are seen as evil and deserving of death. So what's the difference? Is it just because Ro is all for Sokeefe and Alden is really pushing for Sophitz? Have we really sunk low enough to the point where we can adore one character and hate another--despite performing the same actions--simply because of shipping preferences?

Everyone has decided to hate Alden because he showed up to speak with Keefe, ended up getting sidetracked and talking about relationships ( because of Ro, go figure ), sympathized with Keefe and shared meaningful advice from personal identical experiences, and then making sure Keefe knew that he considered him apart of the family.

That was what Alden did. And we have absolutely no reason to believe that Alden was anything but genuine when he stated that he "long considered him part of the family".

And yet Ro is the one who starts ranting about how "he didn't mean it" ( and saying something like that to a teenage boy who never felt loved by his father means a lot--but Ro has to ruin it and say that Alden's words were "a stinking load of garbage" ). Ro is the one whose objectification of the triangle by saying that Keefe being there for his friends is "sabotage" is what sparks Keefe to tell her that Sophie's feelings do matter. Ro is the one who interrupts every conversation by either stating her obnoxious opinion that nobody asked for, or calling a time out so she can bash on Fitz again. Ro is the one who has spent every waking moment since she arrived in the series either making Keefe's desire to be happy for his friends feel invalid, insulting Sophie because she's her own person with her own feelings for someone else, and coming up with every insult under the sun to throw at Fitz. Ro is the one who has no justification for her actions, seeing as she a) is not apart of this triangle, and b) has minimal relationship experience considering both her boyfriends hate her, and one was an arranged marriage.

But...Ro is also the loved and appreciated one.” - JaxTheShade (I’ve been paraphrasing some of the things that he’s said all ready, but I’m directly quoting him for this. His statement is direct and gets to the point)

~End of direct Quote~

I'd like to make one thing clear though - the point of selfishness. There's a stigma to the word that I'd like to clear up, because there are two types of selfishness, rational self-interest, and sacrificing others for yourself.

Fitz is the first type - he has a rational self-interest, he's looking out for himself and his own long-term happiness first. There is nothing wrong with that, if you won't look out for yourself, who will? It's why I completely supported Fitz yelling and breaking up with Sophie - if a relationship is making you unhappy long-term, it is in your best interest to break up with them. It's why Fitz was so adamant about finding Sophie's biological parents, he wanted to avoid future stigma, gossiping, and heckling. Fitz knows how horrible these things are to experience, and so sought to avoid them in the future. This is why Fitz is my favorite character - the others are reactive, Fitz seems to be the only proactive one. (One of the few characters in any literature to be proactive, in fact). While Sophie and the others look at the now and the immediate future, Fitz is concerned with the long-term future, a trait I share with him and one that I rarely see in literature whatsoever, to my vast disappointment.

Ro isn't selfish at all. She's much, much worse - she doesn't meddle in other's affairs for her own happiness, she just does because she can. She has no respect for other's privacy, and throws out insults towards Fitz and Sophie because she just does. She has no motive, impetus, or drive, she just does, and it sickens me.

The second type of selfishness is similar to a bully bullying others because they're miserable and it makes them feel good about themselves. It's horrible and malicious, and I'm not condoning it in any way, but its far more innocent (if bullying can be called innocent) then what Ro does.

Ro is malevolent, she doesn't do it because it makes her feel good, she just does it, with no regard with the relationships and lives she destroys in the process. She's a toxic radioactive waste dump of a person. A toxic waste dump doesn't make people sick and die for their own gain - it just does. That's how Ro is as a person.

Another reason is that she has no regard for what she says or does. She constantly tears Fitz down just because she can (I want Alden to be there next time she tries that. I want Alden to step in and tell her that what she is doing is not okay, because no other character has recognized this so far). I want Alden to be there next time she calls his son a nasty little microbe. I'd like to finally see Ro get some comeuppance for her terrible behavior.

Let's be honest with ourselves - Ro hates Fitz. She hates and complains and whines about how perfect he is. Since when has perfection been a crime? Since when is it up to her to decide the maximum amount of talent a person can have? As a perfectionist myself, I strive for perfection just as Fitz does. There is nothing wrong with striving to perfect yourself - there is if you are actively hurting yourself, but if you're naturally gifted like Fitz is, and you want to be the best you can possibly be, go ahead! Make the most of your innate talent and use it to seek your happiest future. Build & write your own happy ending.

She isn't a part of this relationship. She isn't affected by this relationship. She's actively impeding their ability to seek their own happiness, and not even for her own happiness (which is still horrid), she just does because she's "bored". Her repugnant behavior sickens me.

Ro is a textbook abuser. Let's go over a list of things an abuser does, and see to which characters she applies them to:

Name-Calling: The abuser will blatantly call the abused derogatory adjectives, like stupid or oblivious

We know she does this to Sophie, calling her oblivious. She also twists being perfect into a derogatory adjective, throwing it at Fitz. She also called Fitz a horrible little microbe, along with calling him & Keefe as stupid as amoeba.

Character Assassination: The abuser will use the word "always". You're always oblivious, stupid, late, wrong, etc.

She does this to Sophie, and also somewhat Fitz.

Patronizing: The abuser will be patronizing towards the abused

She does this to Sophie, Fitz, and Keefe.

Belittling: The abuser will belittle the abused

I'm pretty sure she does this to Sophie, Fitz, and Keefe.

Pushing Buttons: Once the abuser finds out what annoys the abused, they will do it nonstop.

Oh boy, does she do this to Keefe and Sophie. (Fitz just gets out of his way to ignore her and avoid her. It's why she's irritated by him, he hasn't opened himself to her and doesn't show flaws allowing her to find ways to sink her nasty manipulating fingers into him)

These are only a few signs of someone being an abuser, and yet Ro manages to hit pretty much all of them.

She gaslights Keefe into believing that Alden is only looking out for himself and his children - something we know to be completely wrong. She's driving a wedge between Keefe and Alden, one of the few other people Keefe respects and thinks looks out for him. The only other parental individual in Keefe's life, in fact, giving Ro total access to Keefe's psyche and making herself the only "true" source of information Keefe can trust. She is a horrible, horrible abuser.

Ro doesn't have benign intentions at heart. She doesn't even have selfish intentions at heart. She just meddles just because she can.

Ro isn’t selfish. She’s just a bad person - for a lack of a better term that would describe her repulsive behavior.

She constantly complains about the elves. Yes, elven culture is a little weird, but you don’t have to complain about it constantly and in-front of the elves.

Ro is also clearly not afraid to gaslight. She forces Keefe to believe that her opinions are the only valid ones. How does she do this? She says that "Blondie doesn't know what she feels," making Keefe think that any emotions he picks up from her are wrong. She says that Fitz is just "Captain Perfect" who doesn't really care about Sophie - that Keefe "deserves" her. She says that Alden's advice is just made up, and that he doesn't really care about him. She’s established herself as the only source of information that Keefe can trust. She’s removed Alden (the one other parental figure Keefe had) and established herself as the only person Keefe can trust. And that is very dangerous and highly abusive.

She even invalidates Keefe's emotions. Every time Keefe stands up to her and says something like "I'm just being a good friend," Ro responds (like any of this is her business) with something snarky. Or, she tells him to "stop being so afraid." And that forces Keefe to believe that his desire to help his friends isn't valid enough. That he isn't valid enough. So he comes crawling back to Ro.

She’s a terrible bodyguard. She threatens to not protect Keefe in Legacy if Sophie doesn’t share her secret with her. THAT IS NOT OK UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. SOPHIE DID NOT TRUST KEEFE WITH HER SECRET OF BEING UNMATCHABLE. RO EXTORTED IT OUT OF HER, USING KEEFE AS A LIE DETECTOR. THAT IS NOT OK; IT IS EVIL.

If you re-read the portion in Legacy where she does this, it reveals some truly horrible behavior.

Here’s another direct quote from JaxTheShade explaining why this part is so disgusting:

“Essentially, Ro is blackmailing Sophie.

Sophie just found out that if Keefe goes anywhere near the Neverseen, he will probably die. ( Because at this point, they just thought the legacy thing would kill him ). So she's desperately trying to get Keefe to make a promise and stay away from Gisela. Keefe, in typical fashion, adamantly states that he's not going to be locked up.

This is where Ro steps in.

She says that she will be the one to protect him and make sure he doesn't run off. ( Since she is his bodyguard ). But instead of just...doing her job...she decides that she can exploit the situation. She can get something out of this.

She figured out that Sophie is hiding something. And from the way she hasn't told anyone yet, Ro can assume that she's trying to keep it a secret. But she also knows that Keefe's safety is important to all of them.

So she threatens Keefe's life--yes, threatens--unless Sophie spills her secret. The situation becomes, "I have all the power here, so unless you tell me a confidential secret, I'll let my charge run off into danger, which you can't have. So I know that I've put you into a corner. I know that I've won here."

If this doesn't scream "manipulative abuser", then I don't know what does.

It's disgusting, really. Ro's behaviour is despicable.

And while her blatant blackmail is clearly the worst offense, she also sprinkled in several other "I'm a bad person" actions.

1) She said that the reason Keefe gets away with things is because she "doesn't care enough to fight him" on them. Well, if you don't care, then why don't you just go back to Ravagog? Because Keefe is the second most threatened person their group, and he needs an actual bodyguard, not a manipulative princess who makes him feel even worse about himself. If Keefe gets hurt when he runs off, did he get hurt because you "didn't care enough to bother"?

2) Ro says that she doesn't care that much about him. Well, thanks, Ro. I'm sure that really makes Keefe sleep soundly at night, knowing that you don't really care about him.

3) And why does she not really care about him? Because she only bothers with Keefe as long as he doesn't make her "look bad". She says that the reason she's stopping him this time is because it'll damage her reputation if he dies. You know, instead of being worried about his life.

4) She says "I enjoy meddling". And that's her excuse for blackmailing Sophie into spilling a confidential secret. And yet she has the audacity to accuse Alden of "meddling" while here she sits, admitting it to everyone and acting like it's not a big deal.

5) Her very last line in the quote just further proves that she's just doing this to get Sokeefe to happen. Instead of feeling remorse for Sophie, who is trying not to look at them and clearly uncomfortable, she just brushes off the secret that she just forced out of her by saying that "it should do the trick". The trick being 'getting Fitz to break up with her'.

This is probably Ro's most egregious act yet.

And yet nobody ever seems to call her out for it or even think that...it's a little weird that she would do this.

But I guess it really isn't weird at all, seeing as we've have evidence in the past that proves she would stoop to this level.” - JaxTheShade

That part in Unlocked where Shannon said that (deeeeeeeeeeeep down) Ro cares about Keefe? Well, it’s ooc. Look what Ro says in Legacy:  "I may not care that much about what happens to you, but if you get yourself killed on my watch, it makes me look bad—especially if I had advance notice. So, I can’t have that."

Re-read that portion in Legacy. Alarm bells should be going off in your head.

She reminds me of the villain Ellsworth Monkton Toohey from The Fountainhead. Do you know what he did? He turned people into slaves by establishing psychological power over them and making them miserable. By killing their wants, needs, desires, and happiness, he turned people into miserable slaves who would obey his every order. And the scary part? Ro uses the exact. same. tactics. that he does (not going to list them here, that would take far too long) on Fitz, Sophie, and Keefe. And Keefe almost perfectly resembles the characters who fall for his manipulations and tactics, while Sophie and Fitz resemble the characters who ignored him and went about their business. It’s really unnerving.

Everyone is entitled to seek their own happiness - as long as their actions don't impede others from seeking their own happiness.

Ro actively impedes Sophie, Fitz, and Keefe's pursuit of their own happiness, doing it for no other reason than the fact that she's bored. It sickens me.

And the fact that Fitz is basically demonized and hated by the fandom while praising Ro is what sickens me the most.

Ro manipulates, gaslights, and abuses Sophie, Keefe, and Fitz for her own fun. She doesn't have any long term goal, just destroying their psyche and impeding their ability to find their own happiness for short term amusement. She mocks Fitz for being trying to be perfect (since when has that been a crime?), she gaslights and Objectifies Sophie, mocks Keefe and openly abuses him, and interferes with their relationships because she finds it funny. She's also a misandrist. She calls Fitz a nasty little microbe (I want Alden and Della there next time she does that). She objectifies Sophie as a trophy for Fitz and Sophie to fight over. She constantly tears down Fitz and Sophie, and uses a number of tactics abusers use in real life on Fitz, Sophie, and Keefe. She is a radioactive toxic waste-dump of a person, ruining their lives and psyches not even for her own gain, but just for her own amusement. Her further abuse of Keefe is repugnant, her objectification of Sophie is disgusting, and her mocking and bullying of Fitz makes me want to puke. She's a terrible, terrible person.

And that is why I hate Ro.

[sebastianshaw]

My big issue with how Marauders deals with Shaw is that while yeah, Shaw always was a bastard piece of crap I want to see fail, I want it to be fair, I want it to be developed properly.

There's no satisfaction in seeing someone that was already defeated losing, Duggan never gives him a chance, he isn't a good villain he is just a punching bag and a plot device.

And the fact he hasn't let Shinobi punch that bag at least a little bit it's annoying, if you will do character bashing at least make it a public event for everyone he wronged, not only the women you want stepping on you, Duggan.

(Sorry I didn't answer this earlier, I was out and this is the sort of ask I needed to be at a computer to reply to ^^) YES EXACTLY. Even if you're not at all familiar with Shaw, or if you hate him (which is totally justified/valid, there are MULTIPLE reasons to DESPISE Shaw, I think there's MORE reason to hate him than not, and I say that as someone who loves him), even if you think Duggan's overall characterization is correct. . . it's still poor writing in how he portrays him as incompetent, incapable, and not at all a threat to the heroes. We also see this in Verendi and the other bad guys who appear, NONE of them have been able to even slightly challenge the heroes in a serious way. And that's a problem. Because a story is only as good as its villain. If you do not provide a suitable challenge to your heroes, if you do not give them an obstacle that they have to struggle against, then their victory doesn't mean as much. If we don't feel fear for our heroes, if we don't feel there's a possibility they could fail, if we don't find ourselves wondering how they'll win (or in some cases, even survive), then it's not half as satisfying when they do overcome those odds. Shaw is introduced in Marauders #2 as needing to come to Emma for financial aid, which is absurd enough. Shaw is the business as Sinister is to science, this is the thing he's the best at. So instantly, his biggest talent is undermined, and he's in the position of needing something from our hero, who lords it over him. He is then debased into throwing a comical tantrum like a bratty child, and then Kate comes in and "zomg pwns" him by calling him a bitch, ooooh! Even if Duggan had written him perfectly for the rest of the series, this would be a really bad way to introduce him as anything resembling a capable challenge for our protagonists. This can work for lesser villains, for ones who are meant as comical lackeys or slimy underlings, or for who are meant to be more a HATE SINK than anything (note that Hate Sinks are rarely the primary antagonists; for instance, in Aladdin, it's not Jafar, it's Prince Achmed) but if they're meant to be a Big Bad, it doesn't work. You can't introduce your overarching villain---which Shaw seems meant to be, as he's the most consistent one---as a joke. You definitely can't continue to treat him as a joke that the heroes can poke and prod and walk all over at every turn. I think even Duggan knew that to a degree, because he let Shaw suddenly become competent just long enough to kill Kate, which is what gives Kate and Emma justification to then wipe the floor with him like they did. He's written as otherwise being too much of a helpless inept clown to justify such a response. And speaking of said response. . . god it's so bad? Not because Shaw is brutalized---I am fine with that, I legit agree he had that coming and he's a bad guy, I'm not expecting him to win or fare well---but because he's brutalized so easily and with so little resistance. Shaw is not an easy foe, and he never has been. His combination of resources, influence, and mutant power is an incredible force. It has been stated in canon that it's easier to take down a small country than Shaw, and he's generally proven that true. He fails in every story he's been in, but he puts up such a fight on all fronts, physical and scheming, that it's easy to forget that, and typically does a lot of damage to the heroes in the process. Sometimes he even obtains some kind of consolation prize. Whatever the story though, besting him is almost always a struggle, as it should be. So if you told me that Kate and Emma, two incredibly intelligent and skilled and powerful women in their own rights, took on Shaw, and that the fight ends with him missing an eye and in a wheelchair, I would think this must have been the most epic battle since the Phoenix Saga. Some incredible fight that displays the cunning tactics and physical ferocity of all three, giving them each their due in a glorious battle that the ladies win by the skin of their teeth. I would have LOVED that. And we

know that's not what happens. What happens is a farce so pathetic it would be funny if it weren't so vile. It's also nonsensical; Kate is able to bloody Shaw's nose BEFORE they turn his powers off, which shouldn't be possible, this man was introduced taking blows to the face from Colossus and SMILING. Or how Shaw has ZERO SECURITY at Blackstone and OPENS HIS OWN DOOR despite being shown to have staff earlier and being a canonically intelligent, cunning man who had to know these ladies were on to him. It's a completely effortless curb-stomp battle, and it does not only a disservice to Shaw as a villain, it does a disservice to Kate and Emma. Because as you said, they don't earn this victory. There's no struggle, no effort, no doubt they'll win. And that not only saps all the tension out of it, it robs them of a chance to shine. If they're not forced to give a fight all they've got, we don't get to SEE all they've got. And as you said, there's no satisfaction in seeing Shaw lose if he was already losing every step of the way. I am all for Shaw losing. My favorite stories of Shaw all have that. But goddamn, do it RIGHT. Also: yes god you're completely right about Shinobi. I think Duggan treats Shinobi with sympathy simply because he hates Shaw so much, but he's also not interested in giving Shin any real spotlight or closure when he could just have his favorite women doing All the Things instead. I think he will eventually come back to Shin's story but it's already WAAAAY overdue. And Shin deserves a shot at Sebastian SO MUCH!!!

[clonewarslover55]

Memories AU  Verda Tal Rose in Triple Zero

Part one(1) out of five(5)

Part two  Part three  Part four  Part five

Summary: Random drabbles based off of parts in the Republic Commando book Triple Zero where Etain interacted with Walon Vau! @just-some-girl-92 wanted to know how Etain would react to Rose, so here’s a new series lol 

Notes: If you have no idea who Rose is check out Memories here! And her many many character notes on my masterlist!! Please do, I’m really proud of Rose and Memories!!

 This is the part where Etain meets Walon, adding Rose of course! 

The formatting, plot, dialogue, etc! Are not mine!!! This is all from Republic Commando: Triple Zero, chapter nine. Written by Karen Traviss. So none of this is mine but the Rose parts! 

If you haven’t read Triple Zero or Memories then I suggest you don’t read this until you do!! 

Warnings: Canon violence, Rose is a bitch ngl, Walon Vau is polite, Rose is not, 

+Safe house, Brewery zone, Coruscant Quadrant J-47, 1000 hours, 371 days after Geonosis+

Vau, sitting at the table, looked tired. He still seemed like a professor who wasn’t very happy with his class, but the physical effort showed in deeper lines from nose to mouth and the way he was drumming his fingers on the table in front of him. It was his trick for staying awake. 

A woman sat beside him. She was leaning back in her chair, an ankle propped on her knee. Her dark auburn red hair, which was greying, was in a messy braid, her emerald green eyes half lidded. She blinked slowly and glanced at Etain, a bemused expression on her beautiful face. The woman was around Walon’s age it seemed, her freckles and frown lines prominent. 

The man who had his head resting on the same table in front of him didn’t look awake at all. Vau leaned forward and lifted the man’s head by his hair, peered into his face, and set him down carefully again. The woman sighed, Vau glancing at her. Both were clearly exhausted and irritated. 

“You’re the relief watch, then, Jedi?” Vau got up and stretched extravagantly, joints clicking, and indicated the empty chair. “All yours.” The woman sat there a little longer, looking Etain up and down. She clearly did not like Jedi it seemed.  When she stood Etain noticed she was tall, a few inches taller than Skirata but still shorter than Vau.

Etain looked surprised. Skirata had expected her to register horror at the blood spatter on the otherwise pristine cream walls, but she just looked at Vau like she was expecting to see someone else. 

She looked back at the fellow redhead. “I thought I was only meeting-” The woman cut her off, she was very rude. “I’m Verda Tal Rose, which means Warrior Blood Rose. You may call me Rose, I’m Walon’s wife. I help him with these kinds of jobs.” Kal sighed, “She wasn’t supposed to be here.” The woman, Rose, rolled her eyes. “I don’t need your fucking permission Skirata. You know I can keep my mouth shut.” She spat the words, Kal glaring back at her. 

Etain was even more shocked. How Skirata described Vau he didn’t seem like the man to take a wife. Let alone one who was incredibly rude. Kal quickly cut the tension by directing his attention to Walon.

“Where are the other two?” Skirata asked.

“Nikto number one is M’truli, and he’s secured in the small bedroom.” Vau was perfectly polite: this was just business after all, and even Skirata felt too centered on the task at hand to resume their feud where it had left off. His wife on the other hand, was not. Rose despised Kal more than her husband did, but not because of the feud between the two men. “Nikto number two is Gysk, and he’s in the study.” Rose spoke this time, irritation in her voice. 

“Your tunics could use a wash.” 

“It’s the little horns. You can’t punch a Nikto. Had to use something else.” Rose nodded in agreement with her husband, a little smirk coming across her face. Etain looked at her and swallowed thickly. Rose seemed quite unhinged, and she had just met her. 

Etain sat down in Vau’s seat and placed her hands flat on the table, still looking puzzled. Skirata leaned against the wall. Vau wandered into the ‘fresher: water tinkled into the basin. Rose stood near the table, watching Etain with an eyebrow raised. 

“You want to tell me what you know,” Etain said soothingly. “You want to give me the names of the people you operate with.” 

Orjul twitched. He raised his head from the table with some difficulty and stared into her face for a second. 

Then he spat in it. Rose pulled a dagger from her boot and snarled. Kal grabbed her shoulder and held her back, “She can handle this Verda.” He whispered,  Rose only sneered and yanked from his touch. She was wound up, Orjul must have spat on her a few times already as well. Rose was easy to piss off though….So Kal was scared to guess what he had said so far.

Etain jerked back, visibly shocked, and wiped the pink-stained spittle with one hand. Then she composed herself again. 

“Keep your stinking mind tricks to yourself, Jedi,” Orjul hissed. Rose glared at him, the man not looking at her out of fear. Rose dropped the blade back into her boot, crossing her arms. 

Skirata didn’t expect her to break at that point. And she didn’t: she simply sat there, although he knew it wasn’t blank inactivity. She had been trained from childhood just like the clone army, except the first weapon she seized would be her control of the Force and her ability to read it like clamoring comlink signals. 

Darman had told him. “She could tell us apart right away by how we felt and thought, Sarge. Wouldn’t that be a handy trick to have?” 

“Can I see the Nikto?” She asked suddenly. Etain looked at Rose who just gave a half shrug letting Etain know she wasn’t in charge. 

Vau came out of the ‘fresher, wiping his face with a fluffy white towel. “Help yourself.” He gave Skirata a “you-know-best” look and unlocked the doors for her.  “They’re securly trussed. You know we keep them from talking to each other, don’t you?” Rose spoke, walking to her husband. 

“I worked that out,” Etain said.  

Rose gave her a tired smile, it was the smile of someone who had been up for hours. It nearly looked like a mothers smile, and for some reason it made Etain’s heart ache. There was just something in Rose’s smile and force signature. Odd. 

She looked back at her husband, “You missed a spot.” She mumbled, taking the towel from him to wipe some blood from his neck. Walon glared at her like an embarrassed child. Rose only pecked his cheek, a loving smile on her face. Vau sighed, looking like he hated the attention. Only a blind man would miss the love and admiration in his golden eyes though. 

Etain laughed to herself at their antics, she couldn’t wait to have that with Darman. The small cute moments in the future. She shook the thought away and disappeared into one room for a minute and then came out and went into the other. When she emerged again, she walked up to the three Mandalorians and lowered her head. 

“I’m pretty sure those Nikto have no information, and know they don’t have it,” she said quietly. 

“People have useful information all the time and don’t know it,” Skirata said. “We piece together apparently useless stuff together and come up with connections.” Verda Tal Rose snorted loudly, “We??” Vau elbowed her, he was too tired to listen to her and Kal argue. Rose glared at her husband, Walon looking at Etain to avoid his wife’s murderous gaze. 

They had clearly been married for quite a while. 

“What I mean is that they have this distinct sense that they’re just afraid of dying.” 

Vau shrugged. “So much for Nikto grit, eh?”

“Every creature avoids death. The difference is that Orjul is afraid of breaking. It feels different to me. It’s not animal dread. It’s not as deep in the Force.” Etain had her fingers meshed in that Jedi way that made her look as if she were wringing her hands. “I might as well concentrate on him. He has information he’s afraid to reveal.” 

They watched her walk the few meters back to the main room and settle down at the table opposite Orjul again and stare at him. 

Vau shrugged and put an arm around Rose’s waist. “Oh well. At least we can have a nap while she’s minding the shop. Then I can get back to work with more tangible methods.” Rose smirked at him and chuckled. She pulled away, nodding at Skirata before walking into the bedroom, leaving the two men alone. 

There was a sharp gasp from Orjul and Vau looked around. Whatever Etain was doing, she wasn’t even touching him. Just staring.

“Kal, those people scare me more than Orjul does,” Vau said. “Even more than your wife?” Walon snorted in that royal way of his, “I have yet to find something scarier than my Blood Rose.” Kal could agree with that. 

“I’m just going to get my head down for a couple of hours. Wake me if she gets anywhere….Or kills him, of course.” Kal nodded and waved his old friend off. Vau’s golden eyes stayed locked with his blue ones for a moment before he left the room. 

~Some Jedi interrogation and Orjul having a mental breakdown later!!~

Skirata grabbed Vau’s shoulder and shook him awake. “Get in there. She’s broken him down enough for you to finish the job.” Rose sat up and rubbed her eyes, unbraiding her chaotic hair. Vau stayed down for a moment, he was clearly exhausted. 

Verda suddenly grabbed Kal’s hand that was still on her husband's shoulder, yanking it towards her so she could see his chrono. “Not bad.” She spoke, her voice still groggy. Walon looked at Kal once Rose dropped his arm. 

“What’s up? Don’t want to let her face the real consequences?” Vau spoke. 

“Just do it, will you?” 

Vau swung his legs off the bed and stalked into the main room to usher Etain from the chair and steer her and Skirata towards the doors. “Go and have some fizzade, Jedi.” He turned to Orjul, who was staring after Etain with wide-set eyes. “She’s just stepping out for some refreshment. She’ll be back later.” 

Walon spoke like a teacher, his accented voice helping him sound even more regal and in control. Rose walked out of the bedroom, twirling a dagger between her fingers with skill. Etain blinked, Rose’s hair was now in a perfect braid instead of a messy one. She’d have to ask her secrets for controlling crazy red hair later. 

Skirata led Etain out by her elbow. He sat her down on a little bench at the back of the landing platform and took out his comlink to call for transport. 

“No, I'm going back in,” said Etain. 

“Only if Vau calls us back.”

“Kal….”

“Only if he really needs you. Okay?”

They were still waiting for Ordo to collect them when Etain flinched and then looked back at the lobby doors. 

They opened and Vau wandered out, rubbing his eyes. There was a distinctive tang of ozone clinging to him, like a discharged blaster. 

“Retail zone, Quadrant B-Eighty-five,” said Vau simply. He held out his datapad with the coordinates. “But he hasn’t given me a date, if he knows one. He was supposed to drop the explosives off in the warehouse, and someone would be along to collect it. He never knew who. 

Skirata sniffed the ozonic scent again and switched to Mando’a, although he was sure Etain had flinched because she had sensed what had happened. Rose walked out just as the men began to argue, quick to distract Etain. 

“Gar ru kyramu kaysh, di’kut: tion’meh kaysh ru jehaati?” 

Translation: “You killed him, you moron: what if he was lying?”

Vau made an irritated pfft sound “Ni ru kyarmu Niktose. Meh Orjul jehaati, kaysh kar’tayli me’ni ven kyramu kaysh.” 

Translation: “I killed the Nikto. If Orjul’s lying, he knows I'll kill him. Orjul would be dead sooner or later anyway.” 

No prisoners: not on this run. It was amazing how many people overlooked the inevitable while hoping for a way out. 

Kal knew Etain couldn’t speak fluent Mando’a, but he was still happy Rose was there to distract Etain from picking up any of the words in the conversation that she might know. “Seriously it works wonders Etain.” Rose spoke, smiling a little at Etain. She’d definitely listen to her hair advice. 

“Darling.” Walon spoke, motioning to the doors. Rose winked at Etain and walked to her husband, walking back inside with him. 

Etain looked at Kal, “She’s a rude one…..but I think she likes me?” Kal chuckled, “Yeah, which means you’re lucky.” Etain frowned at that, “They’re an odd pair, but they somehow work. Just wait until you see them in action….or arguing.” Etain wasn’t sure if she wanted to see any of that. 

Etain almost bolted to the speeder when Ordo settled it on the platform. 

~Back inside~

Walon hugged Rose from behind, both procrastinating moving the corpse. “That girl is smart but naive. She’s too reliant on Skirata, which is never good.” Rose suddenly spoke. Vau sighed, he agreed with her.

Tags: @the-arctic-violet @crimson-dxwn @cherry-cokes-world @thealluringsink @seafoamandlilliesinthesea @leias-left-hair-bun @catsnkooks @royalhandmaidens @simping-for-fives @valkyrieofthehighfae @mxndalorians @colorfulloverbatturkey @peacefulwizardfox @ahsokatano-thetogruta @hounding-around @julyzaa @feathersforclones @chr0nicbackpain @fyrepen33 @ct7567329 @mistflyer1102

[trolltrash]

Trolls Soulmate AUs

I've toyed with the idea of soulmates in the trolls universe in my head for a while so here's what I got:

Soulmates don't have to be explicitly romantic, some choose to start a relationship while some remain best friends

Its more of a predestined bond type deal

Not everyone has one, and that's okay

I figure that the best fitting "type" of soulmate for the trolls universe would resemble the heartsong concept from Happy Feet

Every troll has a unique song that they feel in their heart that mixes perfectly with another's

This conveniently lines up with True Colors, but whether Branch and Poppy are platonic or romantic soulmates is up to you

Brickoppy is my jam, so I'm gonna add that it isn't discouraged for romantic soulmates to welcome other trolls into their relationship

With the Pop trolls, it was very very likely that your soulmate, or at least one if you had multiple, was eaten before you could meet

To find your soulmate was a great cause of celebration and the bond is cherished like gold because of the effects of Trollstice

I've also played around with the more classic tropes (string of fate, first words spoken upon meeting written on skin, etc.) which I realised has ripe angst potential on King Peppy's side:

The strings are only visible to the bearer and their partners

Poppy said she had three strings, which would've been more than fine with King Peppy, if she hadn't also said that two of those strings lead outside the village

He's well aware of the five other kinds of trolls beyond the forest, and he knows that with his little princess growing bigger and bolder everyday, she'll want to set out to go find her missing soulmates

This knowledge terrifies Peppy

The six tribes separated a long time ago because they couldn't accept their differences, so what if they didn't accept Poppy? What if they hurt his baby?

So instead, Peppy hides the existence of the music strings and their history from his subjects and his daughter, and he does a good job of it

That is, until a strange flying animal with an invitation from the Queen of Rock falls into his daughter's hands

Then I wondered how being gray might affect a soulmate bond:

With the heartsong soulmate au Branch, obviously doesn't sing until the first movie, so Poppy doesn't know until True Colors

With the string soulmate au, Branch turning gray causes his two strings to sever, so he has no idea who his soulmates are, not that he wants to know because he's terrified of losing anyone else

Poppy was devasted when she followed her blue string, the only one that didn't lead out of the village, only to find that no one was on the other end

She was inconsolable for weeks after her father said that it might mean that one of her soulmates was eaten before the escape

While she grieved, she made a resolution to love her remaining soulmates twice as much, to make up for the one she never got to love at all

I'm sure you can imagine her elation when Branch's colors were restored along with their shared string

Now that I think about it, a string soulmate au would work just as well as a heartsong au, if the six music strings gave the trolls soulmate strings along with their music

After the excitement of the first movie, Poppy and Branch determined that their orange strings probably lead to the same troll

Now for the Brickoppy goodness:

Hickory had long since given up looking for his soulmates

With the tragedy of his village's destruction, he figured one or both of them were long gone, and he never considered trying to look for them in the other tribes for fear of getting his hopes up

When Hickory took the job to track down Queen Poppy, he certainly didn't expect to find both of his soulmates at the same time, or to need to break them out of jail not five minutes after watching them make fools of themselves singing to the country trolls

Poppy was elated with meeting her second soulmate and Branch was stunned but still suspicious

"Guess folks 'round here don't 'ppreciate a rad medley when they hear one." You bet your ass Hickory was patting himself on the back for nailing that suave first impression on his soulmates

"Branch, Branch! Stop rescuing us for a second and look who I found!"

"Poppy, you don't even know who-" looks at his orange string and follows it to the cowboy across from him "...oh."

Branch is still distrustful of Hickory, just because they were soulmates didn't mean his motives for helping them weren't sketchy

Hickory was torn between genuinely helping his soulmates and saving his brother and culture the entire trip

When they got separated after the Rock Trolls attacked the Vibe City, he was more worried about their safety than losing their bounty

Branch definately feels betrayed when he finds out that Hickory planned to sell them out to Queen Barb, despite Poppy's reassurances that he tried to help her escape

Parb time! :

Barb would never admit it, but growing up she was thrilled to have a soulmate

The idea that she had someone other than her dad who would love her unconditionally, someone who wouldn't be scared off by her passion and intensity made her incredibly happy

When she learned about the pop trolls and how they messed everything up between the troll tribes, she couldn't help but notice how pink her string was, but shrugged it off as a coincidence

To prove to herself that it was just a coincidence she set off to find her soulmate at the end of her string....

....only for it to lead right out of the city

There was no doubt in her mind that Barb's soulmate was a traitorous, string-stealing Pop Troll of all things

With that confirmation, she despised the idea of soulmates

What, just cause some stupid string around her finger said that some preppy pop asshole was meant for her meaned she had to accept it?! Hell no! Barb wasn't going to be told who she would love! She loved her people, she loved her friends, she loved her dad, she loved them because SHE chose to, because she built those relationships alongside them, not because some string said she would, soulmate be damned

Then she finally meets Poppy and her first thought is "FUCK, she's cute!"

Despite her shock, she uses the fact that they're soulmates to taunt Poppy

"I'm not your best friend."

"You're right, we're not friends," holds up her hand with their string, "we're soulmates, Poptart."

Feel free to reblog with your own headcanons if you have any, because I've literally only seen one fanfic about this