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northwest-cryptid · 3 months

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You know, this is gonna be stupid and dumb but I really want to talk a little bit about streaming and more specifically I want to explain to people why the hell twitter, and indie vtubers in general are sort of in a crab bucket that we're having a hard time escaping from; because if you really want to be successful it's a slim chance you do it alone.

That's the crux of this whole post, the idea that you can succeed completely on your own. On one hand, sure it's literally impossible to succeed on your own; you obviously need the support of your audience and probably a few dedicated members who can really pull the weight. On the other hand, what I mean more specifically is that you as a streamer won't grow nearly as well if you focus solely on your own growth.

I don't care what you stream, I don't care how popular you are currently; I don't care what your brand is. I am telling you right now, if you manage to find a genuine even a small but genuine group who care about the growth of each other? You will see visible improvement almost immediately.

Alright let me get into the bulk of this post, because if you're reading this far into it I feel like you probably actually care about what I have to say here.

There's a lot of different points I'm going to cover in this post, the first being the idea of independent vs group growth rates. So let's break down what exactly that means.

Growth is weird, because it can come out of nowhere, but it can also just... not. You could have the best stream on twitch, youtube, whatever; but if no one is watching it and no one is finding you; then you may as well not be streaming as far as numbers go.

I don't hate corporate streamers, and I want that to be clear when I say this because I don't want you to assume I'm some hater. I'm actually a fan of the people I'm going to be talking about here, but I need you to understand why I'm saying what I'm saying...

Let's take a look at Hololive right? You may notice that some of the talent is more or less talented than some of the others. They all have something that makes them uniquely fun to watch sure, but some of them just don't quite fit the bill for a corporate vtuber. Maybe they don't know how to handle a crowd as well, maybe their voice just doesn't have that quality you'd expect from a big name, maybe they don't necessarily put on interesting shows.

I've seen this happen over the course of the last few years of new vtuber debuts from their agency. It's not necessarily a judgement of them, but it left me wondering how they have such large dedicated audiences.

I've seen indies putting on better shows, putting more production value into their work; and not pulling in even a 10th of the view counts. So what gives?

Again, I'm not trying to put those streamers down, I'm not saying that hololive/holostars suck or that they're not good entertainers. I'm just saying they aren't all on equal footing when it comes to being entertainers. That being said, they have something no indie does; and that's a pre-established audience, and a team who will hype them up without drama.

Let's quickly take a step back and I'll explain why these things are important.

So right, let's say you put a ton of effort into your stream assets. You've got emotes, you've got an intro and different screens with all your fancy transitions and music and the whole nine yards. Why are you not getting numbers that reflect that? Your streams are entertaining, you're lively; you're streaming unique content, you're actually doing really good but you aren't getting numbers.

That's because you're not visible; no one knows you're doing any of this. Sure you post to social media when you go live, and you make sure you're streaming in popular categories, but you're still just another voice in the crowd. It's easy to overlook you at a glance.

But then how do you get around that?

Well Cover, the people behind Hololive/stars does it by having a pre-established audience. Whenever a new generation debuts they already have a ton of people who will know they debuted; they'll have eyes on them from the start, and because it's all but assured they'll be popular main-stays for the company fans will begin to form off first appearances and designs alone.

But you can't have a pre-established audience, that's not a possibility for you; not unless you somehow join a company at which point you don't really need any more help.

So what else can you do? Well, let's look at the other thing Cover did, they debuted their talent in teams.

Now you might be thinking "sure I've heard about vtuber teams!"

Right, but see there's a big problem with vtuber teams, especially indie teams; and the reason they don't work is simple.

I'm going to say this and I really need you to give me the benefit of the doubt on this one, please don't just scoff and ignore this because I'm being honest; as someone who's been in a good few teams...

All these guys care about is their own growth, they don't want YOU to grow, they just want your viewers at their streams.

Well that's pretty pessimistic isn't it...

The problem is that a lot of indies genuinely think this way. They care only for their own growth, their own numbers, their own audience. There's no shame in caring about your growth, but when you're willing to exploit others we find ourselves in the crab bucket yet again.

That's the very reason I use the crab bucket as a metaphor for the indie vtuber experience. You need to find a balance, and that balance needs to be between marketing yourself, and those you work with.

Let me explain something that you probably already know, but I need you to think about genuinely...

Let's say I have an audience of 5 people, and you have an audience of 5 people. These are both fairly committed audiences, we stream different things but could find some common ground.

Here's your prisoner's dilemma of sorts. We could collab, but if we do; there's a risk involved right?

Let's say I throw you under the bus, I simply want your audience to follow me, come to my streams; care about my growth.

Let's say you do the same to me, what do we get?

Well we're each down 5 viewers, and up 5 viewers. So we've essentially just traded audiences and now we find ourselves in a tough spot. Sure my audience liked you during our collab but we don't stream the same things, and now that we're not on common ground you find it hard to entertain my audience, I face the same struggle with yours.

Perhaps we revert back to the way things were pre-collab, maybe we don't.

What's the alternative? Well, in an idealized situation, we each simply gain +5 viewers without losing any. We do this by sharing each other's audiences and working together, if we like each other and we find the time to collab and build each other up, raid each other; follow each other and genuinely commit to trying to help the other grow as much as we try to make ourself grow. What we'll find is that we each now have 10 viewers.

Of course if we stream at the same time it's entirely possible those numbers will split back to 5, but if we are genuinely trying to help each other grow then I'll schedule my streams to be slightly before or after yours so that either I can raid you at the end of my stream, or vice versa; no conflict here.

Now sure, it's not always going to work out like that, but as long as we're not hurting one another, we can do something we couldn't do alone. We can cover more ground.

Let's say you play horror games, or strategy games, or maybe FPS games; and maybe I play RPGs, MMOs, and Tabletop games.

We're marketing ourselves to different audiences, but we can find common ground in games that combine these genres. There are plenty of tabletop strategy games, tons of MMOs that mix in FPS elements; we can find that overlap for collabs but independently stream stuff that doesn't overlap.

Why? Because remember what I said about no one being able to find you? They're going to have a harder time ignoring us, when we've cast a bigger net.

Of course there's a few catches here, if your group is too big say, 7+ people, it's hard for us to schedule without conflict; it's hard for our audience to keep up with all of us. It's difficult to find schedules that work for collabs where everyone is available; suddenly it becomes a lot of work, the few who CAN get together feel like they're doing all the work, those who don't have the time or work odd hours, or who stream more casually suddenly get left behind. The team splits, and the audience splits with them.

If your group is too small, say 2 people only, your net isn't much better than just 1, it still helps but you're not going to see that instant growth you're likely looking for. Because your team members don't have enough of a collective pre-established audience to really make any real change.

I believe the sweet spot you're looking for is 3 - 5 members. This lets you ideally cover a lot of ground on various topics and genres; without being so big that it's impossible for an audience to follow you all properly. You won't be talking over each other in collabs, and it's less likely to form smaller in-groups who will out other members they don't like anymore.

But here's the other big thing, you need people who genuinely want to grow; but who also understand you're not doing this as a job just yet.

Everyone's growth is going to look different, some people want to remain indie; some people want to build a portfolio to audition with companies, others just want to have a fun hobby but still want a sizable audience. If I start to enforce my growth necessities on you it might cause conflict.

Conflict never leads to success, there's no success that will come from a team who's at each other's throats. If you screw me over and take my 5 audience members, that's all you're ever going to get. If we work together and we both grow, and I'm constantly hyping you up to my growing audience, you're going to see much larger returns on the investment.

Personally, my goal is to eventually join an agency; that means I'm working to build a portfolio of things they want to see. This means my streams are going to be geared a specific way, I want to showcase my strengths that I know they're going to be looking for. I don't expect the same from you, but I ask you respect those necessities when it comes to me. If your goal is to be a popular indie vtuber, then you may gear your streams in a specific manner as well; I ask that you don't expect me to follow suit, but it's only right that you ask me to respect those necessities when it comes to how you conduct yourself.

If we manage to do that, what we're going to create is essentially what a "vtuber team" actually is, a support unit where we can build each other up.

People focus on the wrong thing with vtuber teams, they focus on the label; they focus on the group. You need to focus on yourself, and build up the others as you go. That doesn't mean you need to screw them over, or only care about yourself. It means you need to put on your own mask before you can help your fellow passengers.

Twitter is a website that literally only cares about their own growth; the structure is set up with that in mind. It's not a place where you're going to reblog MY posts, because you don't want to market ME on your page, you don't want your viewers to invest time in me when they could be investing that time in you. It's simply bad business practice to support other streamers.

Teams are a way for twitter vtubers to essentially market themselves off the work of others. If I'm making videos or doing content that's pulling in viewership, then you can profit from that by making a point of us being in a team and even though you're now retweeting MY work; it's benefiting you because we're on the same team. So overall viewership for the team and not strictly for ME means that you can also benefit if you post to the team twitter account when you're going live and everyone who came for my content sees that.

That isn't inherently a bad thing, but you know what's even better? If I directly take my audience, and raid your stream; because we're working together and I can promote you directly rather than you having to sneak in a cheeky self promotion after I bring in an audience.

Forming a support network is almost essential, you don't need a big team label so long as you have a network who genuinely support one another. The key important thing there is that you don't drop someone who's lagging behind, and you instead seek to pull them up to where you are.

You need to cast a wide net, and then secure everyone's foothold as part of the team. Make sure everyone has what they need to find their own audience, and then give everyone the time to build themselves up while raiding each other and trying to help support one another. Be the marketing team for your fellow streamers.

Let's say we have a group of 5 streamers, we all play different types of games; and we each have around 3 - 5 regular viewers. That's not very impressive is it... but what if we all worked to promote each other? What if we show off one another's channels to our viewers? What if we make a point to market our fellow streamers/team members? Well now we're looking at having anywhere between 15 - 25 regular viewers. Suddenly our streams become that much more appealing to new viewers, we seem popular enough to be doing something actually interesting maybe they'll stop by, hey look there's an active chat, that's pretty fun. Suddenly that 3 - 5 active regulars becomes closer to 7 - 10 active regulars, which again you need to multiply by 5 streamers. Now our numbers look closer to 35 - 50 regulars! All because you pulled in an average of what, 7 viewers?

The problem really does stem from the fact that people let all this shit go to their head, they want to be the popular one, they want to be the one who gets the audience.

I was in a team once where one of our members literally stole the show every collab. They'd loudly talk over us to their chat, we couldn't get a word in; they'd often talk about how wild and cool and fun their chat was but won't never promote us. It kept causing a situation where "the rich get richer" and eventually other members of the team realized if they got in good with this guy and ousted everyone else, they could benefit from this.

Which is why that team literally dissolved and ate itself alive within about 3 months.

Likewise I was in a team who held "mandatory meetings" every week to discuss what everyone was doing, scheduling, and marketing shit. They'd constantly talk about how we needed new assets, and team branding; and we needed to stream so often or do mandatory collabs. They treated this as a job despite the fact I was not making any money at this. I had to explain to them that I did in fact work an actual job, I worked night shift; I couldn't be awake when they wanted me to be for collabs, and even if I could they lived in a different time zone. The only reason they kept me on board was because I streamed some niche titles that caught the attention of a small but dedicated audience; an audience these streamers wanted so bad they refuse to remove me from the group and kept trying to get me to do mandatory collabs with them.

Again, Hololive can do that sort of thing, because at the end of the day it IS a job, they ARE getting paid to do that. You and me are indie, we might make $2 off a sub if we're lucky; we're not going to be doing mandatory anything. That's ridiculous to expect of anyone.

Here's the thing, I want you to think about this for a moment; if you've made it this far really consider this...

Do you want to be successful?

What does that mean to you? Does it mean having a dedicated audience? Making money? Signing on with an agency?

Whatever it is, I can almost assure you it requires more viewership than you're currently getting if you're reading this far into my document about you know... being successful as a vtuber.

So I want you to ask yourself, would you be happier with your audience being 3 times its current size? 4 or even 5 times its current size? I know personally, if I was getting 4 - 5 times the viewership I am now, I think I could actually create a proper portfolio and sign on with a company in the future.

And I want this to be super clear, everyone is different, but if I was working with a team of dedicated and genuine streamers; and I managed to sign on with an agency where I had a huge dedicated audience and got paid a salary. You know for a fact that every discussion with my manager would be about how soon I could in some way, shape, or form, promote and uplift the people who got me there.

That's the mentality that actually brings YOU success, the idea that you want to build up, promote, and uplift those working alongside you. When you view my gains as your gains; without thinking you need to steal them from me, that's when we're growing together.

Truth is, you wouldn't NEED to feel the need to steal them from me; because if we're working together and you're a big part of the reason I have those gains, you can bet your ass I'm returning that favor. I'm going to be marketing you just as much any chance I get.

That's why the corporate vtubers do it that way. That's why even groups like Vshojo make an effort to do collabs and such all the time. That's why even Indie vtubers who are self employed make a point to branch out and work with other Indies.

You are easy to overlook, I am easy to overlook; but WE are harder to overlook. When I go offline, I can't be awake and live every second of every day 24/7 to market myself; and you can't either. However as a network that build each other and ourselves up, we can have a group marketing team going throughout the week constantly without any one person being expected to bare the full burden at any time.

What I'm saying here is logical, it's not some far fetched idea.

The reason we don't see people "just do it" is because it's not that easy.

You need to have a network of people who genuinely want to help build one another up, and who aren't going to cause in-fighting or backstabbing or throwing each other under the bus when one of them gets a little to popular for the other's liking. You need people who see their own popularity growing and everyone else falling behind, and who's going to say "hey when can we collab, I'd like to try to get you in front of my audience." You need to be able to hear that and not take offense to having a smaller audience. You need to figure out how to compromise and find common ground, what can we do that we both will enjoy that won't overshadow one of us; and gets us in front of each other's audiences?

You don't NEED to be in some singular branded "team" for this to work, you just need to be dedicated to marketing a small group as well as yourself. Building up those you stream alongside, and collaborating to create a network of streamers and audience members who will enjoy the company and content of one another.

There's this idea in Vtuber teams that is basically the same problem as the crabs in a bucket.

If I start climbing over all of you to get out of the bucket and be successful, you're scared that I won't turn around and offer you a hand up to help you get out too; which is an entirely valid fear when I'm willing to step on you to get myself out.

However, if we all form some kind of crab ladder and help each one of us get out, and the one on top is always offering a hand to the one at the bottom, what we create is a ever elevating network that can only go up from here; as a unit. The person in "last place" should always be the first to get help up, the person in "first place" should always be the first to offer help, and as those roles rotate and cycle; what we should see is an ever evolving system rather than a stagnant hierarchy.

You also cannot allow things like follower count to mask things like actual live active view counts. I might have 10,000 followers on twitter or twitch or whatever, but if I'm only getting an average of 3 actual viewers on my streams then THAT'S where I fall in the list, I am a streamer with 3 viewers; not 10k followers. Followers don't matter when it comes to view count.

It's not a contest, we're a team; I want to know your numbers so I can figure out if you need help pulling in some more viewers or if you're one of the people who could help someone else pull in numbers.

It really does feel like this sort of support network is impossible for indies the way we are now. Everything is "me, me, me" focused and I don't see that going away because there's so much fear and paranoia over whether or not you'll still be on board to support me after I help you.

I would love to actually build a network like this, and given my history of working in management; and my general life experiences I think I could actually pull it off if I had people willing to build each other up.

The trouble is that the sort of people who I think would actually be a good fit for this sort of thing are not the sort of people who often would be up for actually making a team.

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sugar-petals · 4 years

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:: random things about boyfriend yoongi

↳ ♡ NOTE I saw this format floating around the fandom and thought it was cool and sweet (just like our honey boy so here it goes) 😊 includes an sfw and nsfw bit, both can be read independently.

words. 3k

SFW

First off, Yoongi is laid-back and casually sexy the way we know him. But he also has spikes of energy where he actually gets a little clingy. Any opportunity he will use to hold hands or jump around like a madman with his gummy smile because he got excited about something that you never could predict would make him so happy. He truly is an epiphany.

He’s your most eager personal chef but funnily enough a little unsettled by onions so you end up helping him. Yoongi hates to be crying in the kitchen because of some evil little vegetable but hey, perfect time and place to spend half an hour huddled together cooking or baking. And Yoongi is secretly longing for a cheesy scene, he finds it romantic when you wipe the tears from his face.

His way of speaking to you is a mix of mumbly Korean, high-pitched pouty cat speak, and old-school English slang phrases that he learned somewhere on social media or award shows back in 2018. Most of the time he takes things seriously but is up for some joking anyway. He is sure to giggle every now and then which is really adorable of him. Yoongi is also the person who gets every nuance of your humor and reacts to it.

After being single, you really have to get used to someone waddling around the house. Like— oh, he’s there! And it’s none other than him! Since Yoongi isn’t noisy when he concentrates on his laptop, it really stands out when he morphs from his unmovable rock-like being to a slow rolling stone headed towards the kitchen from time to time. You have to blink every time. And how could you not look up, he’s walking by with his cutest oversized sweaters and striped fluffy socks.

He cannot hide things that normal people would try to keep secret — because of their own discomfort, but he is good at blocking out things that serve your comfort. I’ll explain what I mean. If you have been keeping up with Yoongi postponing the reveal of his surgery until it was successful, you know what I mean. In short, Yoongi is pretty much an automatic filter for things that disturb you. Knowing the right time and place to inform you is the key. As is disregarding things that don’t concern you as a couple, unnecessary drama and opinions. He’s really good at that without ever trying to sugar-coat the important things because he remains a frank and honest soul.

Yoongi has an easier time giving random presents for simple occasions rather than making a big deal out of traditional festivities. So, big celebrations are often kept simple — unless the rest of BTS is there advocating their ‘a little party never killed nobody’ motto — while Yoongi focuses on getting you something attentive or useful every other day pretty much. He’s still a frugal type, you know him. It’s more about inexpensive things that catch his eye because he heard you likes this or that type of snack or want this or that sofa cushion.

There’s always something new and surprising in the fridge and it’s hardly ever empty because Yoongs takes care of the groceries, really thinking it through. Just personal chef things. Being Yoongi’s partner must be the most destressing thing. He takes responsibility for the worldly things, the ironing clothes and the trash cans. He himself thinks that’s the easiest shit ever and is ready to put time into it (he sees the merit, it drives him) while thinking your side — the sheer act of being in love with him, being there for him — must be hard. Which it isn’t.

Yoongi thinks emotions and relationships are tough and complicated while daily life runs smoothly at the snap of a finger. You think maintenance is a drudgery while love is not the maze your boyfriend assumes it is. Deep down Yoongi thinks he’s unlovable and a bad person, that’s why he believes he doesn’t have the burden but you have. That your affection then blazes past the barriers in Yoongi’s esteem is something that he finds incredible. It catches him off guard there, you burst the bubbles of the flaws he falsely imagines he has.

You bet your ARMY bomb you’re watching cat videos together.

Guess who’s the first person to hear all of Yoongi’s upcoming hit tracks? Even Namjoon gets the first sample ten minutes later. You gotta be really advanced at keeping secrets and avoiding accidental leaks with your phone or something.

Yoongi hesitates with the analogy because it’s a little funny and you’re evidently not a steaming liquid made of beans, but he claims you really are like his daily americano. Makes his every morning better.

Now, in all seriousness. What means the most to him is that you take him how he is and are stable company. Yoongi is afraid of betrayal and stupid games so he has to be sure to have a safe bet going. I think that’s why he fancies marriage, it’s a sign of commitment and some degree of permanence to him. And yes, he is a bit jealous in nature since he’s easily invested in someone with a purity of feeling, almost in a naive way. Yoongi easily idolizes his partner and puts a lot of energy into a bond. He wants to protect that, take the risk, and he has watched for someone who radiates genuine trust and faith. He is sure to have found it in you without any illusions and he is right. Loyalty, loyalty, loyalty.

Playing the piano for dinner or date night is a must, he practices constantly to advance to a great standard. He secretly finds a lot of satisfaction in you cooing at his skills and melodies. Those ten bony fingers gliding over the keys with such a technicality and focus, and a passion that makes you hold your breath, it’s great to watch.

Did you see that one coming? He will compose and produce a designated mixtape only for you personally. Yes, with a little self-filmed, self-cut music video for the title track.

Now those things never see the light of day, they’re all for you. But what about your couple life once it touches the social realm? As one might expect, Yoongi is very ‘eyes turn narrow’ with people who bring disharmony to your dynamic and the relationship in general. In fact, he is grumpy and disappointed, and should someone give him a reason, distinctly brutal. If someone even attempts to test you or plays manipulative games, Yoongi is relentlessly turning them from the inside out with his words that never miss the mark. They’re efficient. As I said, he hates playing annoying games, he’ll do any shortcut and be Yoongi.

I guarantee you can lean back and will never the fazed by stupid people and time wasters again. No need to lose face. Yoongi does the dirty work and is the best possible defender to have on your side. He handles that. Invasive opinions and useless phrases he will shove right up some trashtalker’s ass and leave. Let’s squarely say he is unafraid to be a armchair critic of your and his haters and doesn’t want any of that nuisance to disturb what you have together. He cuts very quick and makes sure not to get tangled up in trouble.

Yoongi will also debunk a whole bunch of weirdos on weverse asking about your private love while he’s at it. Prepare for some very entertaining snide remarks. Oh my god, so many entitled people will be pissed off. Many will also celebrate him for stepping up. What’s actually important to Yoongi is that nobody taints what is like a treasure to him.

It won’t be hard to overlook that Yoongi is very proud of you as well. He looks confident and revering when he hangs out with the group and you’re somewhere close by, even just doing something trivial.

He’s also pretty touchy, sometimes publically to demonstrate something, but mostly in the relative calm and safety of a hotel room. When the lights are out, all barriers crash, the utter romantic takes over. His favorite types of kisses besides those onto his hands are when you kiss his lashes. And yep. Yoongs is such a cozy little spoon. A very curled up one with cute shooky pajamas on most likely.

Talk about clothes. Believe it or not, Yoongi’s fashion goes through a significant change due to the relationship. He knows that you are touchy and thinks about what kinds of flannels are the biggest cuddle magnet, after all. And oh wonder, he will also show some level of skin when he accidentally hears your praises for his arms and legs and collar bones and glowy skin while talking to a close friend of yours. So, look forward to that in summer (he still dislikes the winter cold and wraps himself into scarves twice his size, mind you) though it’s still for your eyes only, he covers up when going out. Truth be told, he enjoys when you casually touch his skin. Especially the arms. Which hold up the firmament to you, and your world, too, and guard it.

BTS will know about how excited he is about you because he often boasts about for how long you’ve been living together by now. We all know this is Yoongi’s favorite way of bragging and it further shows that loyalty, dedication and longevity is the spice to his every meal.

Yoongi is probably going to quit the bottle because you naturally make him feel at ease and upbeat. In fact, he simply forgets about his wine. I don’t have to convince you that Yoongi will be very immersed in any interaction with you whether that be watching movies or discussing his latest tracks.

Those discussions come with extra back massages for him because he spends a lot of hours in his chair. Especially around the neck, it’s no secret that this is in every cat’s top 3 favorite massaging areas. Yoongi is gonna make some really raspy, sleepy sounds and just melt in your hands. He’s gonna sleep like a baby afterwards every time. Sometimes, he says funny and cute things while he dozes. He looks very content.

Say goodbye to the 21st century adulting annoyances in your life because Yoongi has a grip on those without a word. Those six specific chores that always plague you take him only a dozen minutes and he is eager, the forms to fill out are already sent off, the list of people to e-mail is weeded through. The taxes are paid, the bank account is full, the meals are on the table, garnished to perfection. Roof over the head, and it’s a sturdy one, Yoongi bought a sound haven house to inhabit a lot of happiness for two.

He’s probably the only person who doesn’t see it as a loss of dignity if you want to hold on tight to him during a dentist visit as a grown ass mf. Why all of this? Yoongi cannot not strive to feel needed in his actions. He wouldn’t like himself if he couldn’t contribute something reliable and useful. That you find things worthy of your time is priority. You complement each other, what you think is a waste of energy makes him work and strive and vice versa. That way, in the end all things are taken care of.

Giving is more important than taking in Yoongi’s world. He thinks of everything because he considers it an offense to have you in a pile of duties, that is, if you don’t like ‘em. It’s his form of dedicating his efforts and showing respect. He doesn’t need much in return. The things he expects if at all don’t feel like a duty: Much like he doesn’t consider doing those acts of services for you likewise.

Work horse he is, he needs something on his daily to-do plan. Which includes making you feel unbothered by the occasions of an incoming strict world when it’s getting to you. You’re supposed to do what you feel like doing just like him and not slave away at fifty deeds. That you torture yourself with daily life hassle is the thing he dislikes seeing the most. He enjoys doing these things so he’s happy to get going.

What’s not a daily life hassle: Holly is a big fan of yours. Instant friendship. Just wanted you to know.

He always knows how to preoccupy himself and finds something to improve. Getting on your nerves, and that’s no surprise, is the last thing Yoongi will ever do. In fact, you sometimes have to search for his napping spot because he got lost somewhere in the house.

He either sleeps or works, his philosophy is simple. If you need him, he does appear seemingly out of nowhere. And, he spends as much time with you as you enjoy, not always prioritizing his producing unless it’s urgent or he’s on an inspiration streak. Which is great anyway, you can sit next to him listening. It’s the right balance of work and play.

Yoongi is not above blatantly showing off. Actually, he goes for an act of stunning pretty often. You know how cats parade around whatever they just caught. He wants to impress you with assets and accolades and appraisals, the boy can’t help it. That you only lightly nod at most of it with a little smile will confuse him but he will get the point later on. You wanna signal Yoongi that you anchor your love for him not in shifting numbers and chunky metal pieces.

That you don’t confuse his signs of outward worth and fame with the core of the guy you find the sweetest in the world is very important to him. He will take some time to see through that because he’s used to being loved through status and its symbols by people close and afar.

The way you throw yourself at him to give a big smooch in random situations — especially when he doesn’t feel great about himself— rather than only when he say gets a new car is sending him a message. Again, he has to grow into that. He will retreat at the beginning because he feels worthless of your affection on days where he doesn’t feel big and bold and successful. But since he sees you jumping on him because you need only his kind and squishy presence and see him as no different than usual because he’s always Yoongi underneath, your boyfriend will change his mind about it sooner or later. He learns that your presence makes him feel like a billion dollars yourself.

You don’t wallow in the regrets of other people missing the point of Yoongi and instead focus on always understanding him rather than enabling Yoongi into wrong directions. And there are many of those, his mental health can tell you a thing or two about it. He begins to get that you really know what you’re doing and are in it for the real him which makes him feel really loved far underneath all surfaces and images. You accept his fame and admire his work with music which is what he’s truly doing it for but also don’t forget that the most vulnerable Yoongi is the one that you’re there for and not a facade.

NSFW

I know you’re curious. That Yoongi’s sexual style is more than just interesting goes without saying. To give you an idea. Anything steamy with Yoongi means him taking his time. You know, for making it quality. Yoongi wants to grow into the right balance of activity and staying relaxed. He is good at keeping cool and bringing some focus to the madness. He wants to figure out how to be more casual instead of tense and overly preoccupied which he’ll be at the start of the relationship. But the fast learner he is, his nervousness fades way faster than you think.

Yoongi is extremely afraid that he can’t please you or starts to become awkward slash clueless so he darts to the opposite of the spectrum and overperforms, even plays a character. You have enough cool yourself to tell him what to do in the pace that works best. That he stays centered in his body is important for you to teach him. When he gets grounded and juggling his confidence is out of the equation, he fucks the best.

His favorite position besides giving oral — with you on your back — will be doggy style. Man, we gotta talk about that. Slow to upper moderate pace, nothing too all over the place. Yoongi moans very slowly, too, all drawn out. Get ready for a frequent session of some anal to unwind. You heard that right. First, Yoongi will get the two of you into the right rhythm with his hands at the sides of your waist, then, ride it out in slow mo with his right hand properly stimulating you from the front.

By habit, he will add some lube here and there but not use insanely dripping amounts so everything gets messy or he can’t touch you without sliding off anymore. Just enough to slide well. Yoongi is so good at this I swear, it’ll be your favorite thing to relax. He has the restraint and technique to pull it off rather than pulling out, huh. Yoongi is gonna stay inside you for ages. It feels like he’s massaging every spot for some extra time. It’s amazing to slack off your muscles, cool off, and get many a gentle but fulfilling orgasm.

He’s not gonna put you through the hassle of dealing with an anal creampie cleanup so he keeps it wrapped, and mostly focuses on your movements altogether while keeping his own climax smooth and more relieving rather than something that relentlessly knocks him out in one go. Yoongi is good at observing and doesn’t feel the need to chase a violent high which is why he is so great at sex. Fucking with Yoongi leaves a wholesome feeling and you never feel ashamed or guilty, or a sense of being dirty and ruined.

He enjoys having sex to make you feel really good and works his hands on you very respectfully. His goal is to have you wet and pulsing after a long while of getting you there, and putting you to a good night’s sleep. He’d feel terrible if he left you sore or disturbed. He is really passionate, especially with his kisses or when you ask him to slide into very deeply, but Yoongi being brash and controlling is an image out of sight.

Besides giving you the number one heavenly assfucks, Yoongi also likes to work his tongue as we know, and he’ll work it all over. Few body parts of yours have not made contact with that glorious mouth and I say that in the best of ways. You can instruct him to do whatever, Yoongi obliges with radiant joy. And here again, he takes minutes upon minutes. Kissing and kissing and licking and maybe even teasing once or twice to make you smile. You know, a little signature wink. Honoring your skin and every shape is not something that Yoongi has to talk about, he will physically show it and I swear it’ll finally get into your head with every little move, Yoongi has totally surrendered his tongue to your body and worships it.

#yoongi #yoongi hc #bts smut #yoongi smut #bts #yoongi x reader #boyfriend yoongi #yoongi scenario #yoongi imagine #bts x reader #boyfriend bts #bts bullet points #bangtan

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sashi-ya · 3 years

Text

So, I know I should ignore the haters and bla bla. I really do. But there is something that's been bothering me to no extents, and I want to talk about it. The fact that these little bitches keep telling us that we are not allowed to do some stuff because of our age. (I know I'm not the only one who has been harassed by this).

Leaving some proof of it:

What do you expect us to do? Retire and die? I mean, do you really believe we are not young people or what? I mean I know I’m a young adult, but do you really believe I’m old enough not to enjoy anime, manga or whatever the fuck I want to enjoy?.

And who the hell invented Tumblr after all? It was us. My generation. We made Tumblr famous. And fan fics? Do you believe it’s a 2021 thing? No babe… fan fic’s been around since the 1950’s.

And what’s funnier is that my page is literally dedicated to ONE PIECE. The manga and anime have been around since 1998. Most of us growth reading/watching OP. (I was 5 years old, you know?)

Oda was 23 when he started writing OP. And for that matter let me tell you about some of my other fave mangakas:

Kohei Horikoshi was literally 30 years old when Boku no Hero was first released.

And what about Hajime Isayama? HE WAS FUCKING 25 when Shingeki no Kyojin was fucking released.

So, tell me, are they young enough for you to read their works?

Everyone is allowed to enjoy things. EVERYONE. 15 y/o, 27 y/o, 99 y/o. EVERYONE.

I have two careers. I have saved many lives since I was 21 working at a PEDIATRIC ICU. I pay my bills and I’m a responsible member of my society. And I LOVE to write and watch fucking anime. What’s the matter with that?. Do you expect me to have 20 babies and stay at home cleaning after my husband? Because IT WON’T FUCKING HAPPEN, you know? I’m a free woman, I’m allowed to enjoy and be happy. And I’m more than allowed to use INTERNET as much as you or anyone else.

That stupid mentality of being a fucking slave of society. What do you expect us to do after work/uni? Just sit on a corner until our next shift?.

But, after all, you are gonna be my age in a couple of years and you will -hopefully- realize how horrible you’ve been to others.

Oh, and btw, there is another thing I would like to include... And is that minors should be supervised by responsible adults when using social media. We as adults are not responsible for other people’s children. So don’t come to me with “but there are children”. Uhum, and why are they on the internet? Don’t your parents know about the real dangers of it?. Your little son won’t die if he reads a smutty fan fic, but will definitely be in danger if some other adult ask them for pictures or even worse because parents are not there to keep their children safe.

#sashi speaks #sashi is fed up

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fa-by · 3 years

Note

hi F! Please do an analysis on Lauren’s new song While I’m Alive! She said on her instagram that it was directed to “someone” at first 👀👀

Hi to you too, dear Anon 👋🏼😄 and for sure. No problem, in fact, I'm sorry for the delay 😅

So. While I'm Alive is part of the Femme it Forward's all-female album called Big Femme Energy, Vol. 1. Laur wrote it long before she was part of this project, and yes, she said she wrote it with a person in mind by turning a vent into art because tired of the way she was/is treated:

This person, in my opinion, is 100% a shark. And this also responds to another ask I've recently received:

Hey to you, dear Anon 👋🏼😄 Yep, Laur wrote it for someone among the higher ups and therefore it concerns her career in particular, but she also applies it to other situations in her life in general.

Now let's move on to the interpretation.

Verse 1:

“Don't say I'm too loud when I cry out what I've held inside

I wanna know why they tried to take me and bury me alive”

The music industry is dominated by men. Gender inequality, sexism, and ageism reign supreme. No matter how much harder they have to work in order to succeed, women are anyway either sidelined, or supervised by men. Why? Because there’s a huge disparity between men and women, especially due to the way the public perceives their success and power. For example.

A man is praised for performing on stage with just the guitar. A woman who does the same, however, not only is she criticized for being too lazy and boring for not having made the performance more lively with a choreography, but she’s also criticized for what she was wearing. Same woman who gets criticized when she instead performs with a choreography because she wasn’t good enough. A woman who can’t be a drummer because it’s a thing for men, and if she persists in wanting to play, it’s not because it’s her passion and she’s pursuing her dream, no; it’s because she wants attention 🙄. A woman who can’t have a good idea about a song because, what can she understand about music, right? 😒

Unfortunately, it’s all a double standard. Women work harder than men and they then get questioned whether their success is deserved. One way or another, women are constantly being torn apart. Reason why Laur begins the verse by already letting us understand how put down she is by the sharks, followed by a question that actually doesn’t represent a real request for information, but that implies a predetermined answer.

“'Cause who am I to think that I have a right?

Or decide to know what I need, right?”

She's sarcastic of course. Since they've always told her what to do, how to act, and how to feel, here she's including a couple of examples among the thousand and more things they always have said and say to her. Because who better than her knows what's best for her? The answer is her. Especially when these orders, because they're orders, are imposed on her to make money with her career and not for her sake or because they care about her as a person.

“It's in the way, I talk and I walk away

From what you made me”

By ‘what you made me’, she refers to the way she was before. The person who was forced to accept everything she was told to do and therefore she couldn’t be herself. The person they made her become, and she didn’t like that person. Now she no longer wants to ‘submit herself’ and accept everything just for money and fame as she did in the past because she was legally obliged and not to do so. She did it many times especially when she was still in the group, but unlike in the past, she luckily no longer has the same kind of obligations. So if she doesn’t want to do something now, she simply doesn’t. She says no to what she doesn’t accept and walks away from that (I talk and I walk away) by not caring if she doesn’t have the same success as before because she prefers not to have that kind of success anymore but to remain herself, rather than have it and be just a product (what you made me); a different person from who she really is.

Verse 2:

“And I know this is all too familiar

Feel the motive behind all that fake love”

In Olivia Rodrigo’s voice 🎤: 🎵 Did you get deja vu, Laur? 🎶 No, but all joking aside. By ‘I know this is all too familiar’, she means what she has already experienced in the past and which she has once again found herself in front of. Once out of both Epic/Syco and Maverick, she believed she would’ve be dealing with better people, but it wasn’t like that. She realized that those kinds of people are everywhere because it’s the music industry that’s like that. The problem isn’t the single label or the single management team, it’s the entire industry. The problem isn’t the surrounding, but the people who are in it. Not all of them luckily, but most of them unfortunately.

By ‘Feel the motive behind all that fake love’, on the other hand, she describes precisely that kind of people. The fake ones who first treat you well because they want something from you, and then show themselves for who they really are when they don’t get it and try to hinder you, punish you, destroy you, and ‘bury me alive’ (verse 1) because of it.

So. Although I said it playfully at first, these two sentences go perfectly well together to describe the sense of deja vu that Laur felt.

*Small note* In the next three sentences of the verse, I will use these ‘---’ to complete her sentences as if I were Lauren to give you my interpretation. I’ll then continue as I always have. Oh and, she’s talking about her music here.

“I can’t take all these unsolicited opinions --- Nope, not anymore. I don't want them. Thanks, but no thanks.

Go ahead and be the scared ones --- with someone else who’s ready to tell you yes to everything and who doesn’t have a vision on how they want their own songs. Someone else who has no problem being a marketable product/puppet.

Either way, I’ll get it done” --- with other producers, songwriters, collaborators, etc., of my choice.

“I’ve been told I’m too much

Too proud, too cruel

Too wild, difficult to be around”

Let’s also add too confident, too sincere, and too honest from the people who mocked her at school before she became famous, shall we? Or maybe too fat, too arrogant, too full of herself, too whore, and all the other things said by the haters over the years? 😒😒😒🙄🙄🙄

I was being sarcastic of course, guys. I mean, can our girl ever have a break?

“With too much to say

Never in the right way

So, what’s the right way?”

Rhetorical question here because the right way is exactly the way she is. She has no intention of behaving in the ‘right way’ they want because it would mean not being authentic and automatically it would no longer be the right way because she would be fake.

Chorus:

“If I can’t be me

Who do you want me to be? (Who do you want me to be?)”

I love, love, love, love this. For real. It’s so powerful. And it doesn’t surprise me that this part along with the rest of the chorus is repeated four times, because it’s the most important part and it encloses the whole song perfectly.

“‘Cause if you can’t see beyond your gaze”

Behind their ideas to be the perfect product without looking at the person and their feelings.

“You don’t phase me and I don’t trust you anyway

‘Cause runnin’ through life, I figured out time

Don’t wait for no one”

After all these years and precisely because of what she’s been through, she realized she can’t wait for them to see it the same way she does or for someone to ‘save her’. She prefers to ‘save herself’. Therefore, she will continue to be wary, not to trust, and above all, to remain authentic as she says here:

“So while I’m alive, I’ma just be me (I’ma just be me)

Whoever that ends up being”

And that's it, dear Anon 😉 This song is dedicated to one particular asshole who gave her the idea, but mostly, it's dedicated to all those assholes who tried to tell her what kind of music she should have made, how she should have behaved, and how she should have felt. She decides for her, and she doesn’t care if she doesn’t have the same success anymore. Just like she doesn’t care about all the rest like the expectations and superficial perceptions they have of her that are completely wrong.

I hope you enjoyed it, and I wish both of you Anons and everyone else reading this, a beautiful day ❤🥰🤗

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neverendingdream111 · 3 years

Text

GENSHIN IMPACT AS IDOLS

- one of the groups consists of: Zhongli, Childe, Venti, Xiao, Diluc, Kaeya and Albedo

- Zhongli is the leader and the oldest obvsly and his smooth deep voice is to die for

- He's also the visual along with Albedo (tho everyone here is gorgeous, ngl)

- Childe constantly switches between rap and vocal, but he's mostly recognized for his amazing dancing (he's the main dancer for a reason)

- Venti is the main vocal and possibly writes most of their songs (sometimes Albedo helps him)

- Funnily enough, Venti is often confused for being the maknae while in reality he's the second oldest in the group

- Xiao is the main rapper

- He refuses to sing but would do it if asked (rarely)

- and he's the real maknae - even tho he hates it he can't do anything about it (and everyone, especially Venti and Childe, loves teasing him for it)

- Diluc and Kaeya are the other rappers along with Xiao and they are related in some way tho both refuse to reveal anything to the public (but everyone is convinced they're brothers)

- they don't get along most of the time and argue constantly, but it only amuses the rest of the members and the fans absolutely love their arguments bc it more often than not turns into a rap battle

- and let me tell you, they completely kill it

- then, we have Albedo. He and Zhongli are the most peaceful ones and most likely keep the team together bc if not those idiots would've caused absolute chaos eons ago

- His voice is angelic, everyone adores it

- Childe and Kaeya are the most chaotic duo especially together

- they have the stupidest ideas and like to mess around

- and they are perfectly aware of their god-like looks and also have the audacity to use it "against" their fans (not that anyone complains)

- they are partners in crime when it comes to teasing Diluc

- Kaeya does it on a daily basis and Childe found it funny and decided to join him on causing inconvenience to others, lol

- Xiao, even though he's an idol, hates interacting with humans but makes an exception for fanmeetings, concerts, interviews and such because Zhongli raised him right--

- he has a soft spot for cats and would have one at the dorm if it wasn't for Venti being allergic to them (although he doesn't see any problem with it)

- speaking of the dorm, it's the pure definition of destruction

- Childe and Kaeya being the little shits they are room together and they are that kind of roommates that would blast music on full volume in the middle of the night just because they felt like it (but obvsly they do it to summon a demon in the form of sleep deprived Diluc because they know he's a light sleeper)

- Venti at some point moved in with them bc he felt like it and it's totally not because Xiao kicked him out--

- Zhongli and Diluc share a room because they both know how to appreciate a moment of peace and they just like each other's company; their perfect afternoon on their day off is sitting there with a cup of tea each and exchanging stories they've heard and/or experienced

- Albedo is probably the only person Xiao would room with excluding Zhongli (and maybe Diluc but it's debatable) because he's calm and collected, doesn't talk too much unlike the other three and when he does talk it's nice to listen to him

- also, the sound of sketching calms him down

- Venti somehow lives in all of the rooms in the dorm. First he roomed with Xiao and Albedo, but he got kicked out by the maknae. Then he gravitated towards Zhongli and Diluc but after a few days the redhead got so annoyed with him he ended up with Childe and Kaeya. The three of them share a braincell, that's why they get along so well, but even though he lives with them he sometimes ends up in the other rooms but that's just him

- he likes a change of scenery, ehe

- Zhongli's the dad of the group

- whenever someone has a problem they automatically go to him

- also, even though they are a really chaotic group, they are equally capable of working together (main reason why they are so goddamn awesome on stage)

- Xiao might act like he doesn't care but he does. A lot

- every time one of his hyungs is having a bad day he subtly tries to cheer them up. He feels awkward with words in these moments and physical contact isn't really his forte but instead he does things like buying them their favorite snack, or opting to watch their favorite film with them (even if he absolutely hates it he still would watch it)

- everyone obvsly knows what he's doing and they appreciate it

- Childe and Kaeya actually aren't as easy-going as they like to appear on stage. They are really emotional human beings and are probably most affected by hate comments and such

- Diluc, as much as he despises their attitude and teasing he has to endure bc of them, cares about them a lot and usually he's the one to knock some sense in them when they believe the haters or just have a bad day. He may not like their behavior but he's not heartless and deems them as family (even tho he wouldn't admit it)

- Albedo isn't a lot older than Xiao, maybe something around a few months, so everyone thinks of him like a second maknae and just because he gives off the vibe, y'know

- He loves drawing and sometimes does a sketch of one of the members or recreates a fanart of them he saw on Pinterest (cue to the fans going wild)

- He, alongside with Diluc, often cooks for them. They both are amazing cooks and I refuse to believe otherwise

- Venti has a playlist prepared for every occasion and uses them accordingly

- he also has playlists dedicated to every member of the group and it's his way of cheering them up or being there for them when they are separated

- as for the run episodes, well.... It can be described in one word

- chaos

- they're even capable of riling Zhongli up!

- tho he mostly opts to watch the chaos from the sidelines, snickering under his breath, he ends up in the crossfire from time to time

- contrary to popular belief, the most competitive ones are Diluc and Xiao

- they are so set on winning they sometimes forget that it's all a game

- Childe once got an elbow to the face in one episode but still no one knows who did it (it was Kaeya--)

- Albedo is just... There, tho he does enjoy it. More than he would admit

- Childe and Kaeya are dying of laughter most of the time and do stupid things that probably only they understand which makes the other laugh harder

- and Venti absolutely loves being the host: it gives him a perfect view of his friends who half the time have no idea what the hell is going on and, of course, power

- the fanmeetings are just the other excuse for them to make fun of each other and fool around

- fans don't mind it one bit because it is honestly hilarious to watch the utter chaos unfold

- even when they are signing albums and merch they throw comments here and there to provoke the other

- especially Xiao bc he's a softie when it comes to their fans and as long as the girls don't do anything... Weird, he doesn't mind interacting with them and sometimes finds himself actually enjoying the contact

- while we're on the fanmeetings--

- Zhongli is absolutely wonderful. He's the kind to delicately hold your hand, look into you eyes and smile softly while focusing entirely on you and what you have to say, indulging into conversation as well

- if it wasn't for the staff members reminding him that the time's up, he would spend at least an hour with every fan

- Childe is so excited he grins so much his cheeks hurt, and would look at you like you just made his day. You can be stuttering, super nervous and anxious and he'd just say it's completely fine and that you should take your time, even if the staff says that you should move to the next member

- Venti is the one that talks a lot, but would shut up and listen to you. He especially likes playing with your hands or just some games like rock-paper-scissors

- he also loves it when some fans show him their singing and he encourages them to go on, synchronizing with them and making an amazing duet

- Xiao is, like I've said before, a big softie. He really appreciates the fact that people find their music nice and genuinely like to listen to it. Would probably ask you questions like "what's your favorite song?", "What do you think of this album *gestures to the one he just signed*" etc

- he DID wear cat ears once because a fan gave them to him and they looked kind of cute

- he didn't hear the end of it for two weeks minimum and Childe and Kaeya probably have the pic as their wallpapers

- Diluc is the most... normal one? I mean, he enjoys the meetings a lot, but he doesn't show his excitement as much as the others. Conversations with him are like talking to an old friend that understands you and it's just so... wholesome

- he's honestly surprised when he gets gifts from the fans. He does appreciate it of course, but he just doesn't really understand why you would go as far as to give him something for no particular reason please give him lots of love he needs it-

- Kaeya is the one with the audacity to flirt with you. Loves seeing the blush on your cheeks and just enjoys annoying people. Though he sometimes stops it out of mercy and opts to talk with you like a normal human being--

- most protective of their fans. Sees one in distress or being picked on, immediatly steps in or tells a staff member to handle the situation

- Albedo is somewhere between Zhongli and Diluc's behaviour tbh. He's really sweet, loves talking to the fans and gets super excited whenever one of them shows him a fanart - especially if it's an original idea

- now let's get to the best part

- as lovely and peaceful as they are on a daily basis, they turn into freakin devils on stage

- kind grandpa with a calming voice? Who's that? A goddamn satan entered the chat

- ooooh, the cat lover? Sorry, we only have a mf demon available

- don't even get me started on the Childe-Kaeya-Diluc trio--

- all in all, they may be annoying each other night and day but they still love one another like family and their bond only strengthens when they stand in the spotlight

I had this idea today and, well, it turned out like this, hope you enjoyed! I also may be doing some sort of continuation to this with Xingqiu, Chongyun, Razor and Bennett as a trainee idol group so let me know if you'd like something like this and if you have any ideas for other groups!

02.05.21

~Nana

#genshin impact #genshin impact hcs #zhongli #childe #xiao #venti #diluc #Kaeya #Albedo #genshin impact as idols #idol boygroup

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dwellordream · 3 years

Text

“…There is a real belief on behalf of a not insignificant subset of society that the medieval Church was a shadowy organisation dedicated solely to suppressing knowledge and scientific advancement. This is not true.

The Church was in all actuality the medieval period’s largest benefactor of scholars of all stripes. Initially, in the early medieval period much learning was focused in monastaries in particular. Because monks took a vow to eschew idleness, they were always looking for new ways to work for the greater glory of God, or whatever. Sometimes this took the form of doing manual labour to feed themselves, but as monasteries such as Cluny rose to prominence they did more and more work in libraries as well.

Monks copied and embellished manuscripts and kept impressive libraries. Sometimes this work took place inside what we call “scriptoria” where more than one scribe is working at a time. They saw themselves as charged with transmitting knowledge. A lot of that knowledge was, of course, pagan, because they were extremely into classical thinkers. They were also reading this work of course, and writing their own commentaries on it. Many of them took the medical texts and used them to set up hospitals within their monasteries, as we have talked about before.

Lest you think this is all one big sausage fest, women were also very much about that book life within nunneries. They also had their own scriptoria and were busy scribbling away, reading, writing, and thinking. If you wanted a life where you strove for new scholarly heights, odds were that in the early medieval period you did that inside a monastery on nunnery.

As the medieval period moved on, scholarship eventually moved out of the cloister and into cities when the medieval university was established. The first degree awarding institution to call itself a university was the University of Bologna established around 1088, though teaching had been going on there previously and students had been going to Bologna from at least the late tenth century. Second was the University of Paris, which was established in 1150. Again teaching had been happening there from much earlier, and at least 1045.

Medieval universities weren’t like universities now, in that they didn’t have established campuses or anything like that. They were, more or less, a loose affiliation of scholars who would provide lessons to interested students. The University of Paris, for example, described itself as “a guild of teachers and scholars” (universitas magistrorum et scholarium).

In Paris there were four faculties: Arts, Medicine, Law, and Theology. Everyone had to attend the Arts school first where they would be asked to learn the trivium, which was comprised of rhetoric, logic, and grammar. Basically that meant all undergrads spent their time learning to argue, which is how the whole Abelard thing comes about. Then if they wanted more they could go do medicine, law, or theology. Theology was considered the really crazy good stuff, as medieval theologians were sorta held up in the way we worship astrophysicists like Neil de Grasse Tyson (ugh) or Stephen Hawking now. But if you wanna be a dick and super modern about it and think that nothing is more important than science, you will note that medicine is there and actively pursued.

So what, what does all of this have to do with the Church not being suppressive? Well literally everyone, both scholars and students in a medieval university was a member of the clergy. That’s right. Are you a Christian and you wanna learn about medicine? Well you need to take holy orders first. So every single scientific advancement that came out of a medieval university (and there were plenty) was made by a man of the cloth.

The quick among you might have spotted that the thing about unis is that they were just for dudes though, and that is lamentably true. Women weren’t able to take the same orders as men, which means they were excluded from university training. Plenty of them got tutored if they were rich. (See poor Heloise who just had Abelard, like, do himself at her.) Otherwise there was plenty of sweet stuff going on in nunneries still and always, as the visionary natural biologist Hildegard of Bingen can attest. Monasteries were also still producing good stuff as Thomas Aquinas would be happy to let you know from the comfort of his Dominican order.

Given that all of this is the case, it’s hard to square that circle of “the Church is intentionally suppressing knowledge!” with the fact that everyone actively working on acquiring and furthering knowledge was a member of it and all. The Church was a welcoming home to scholars because it was a place where you got the time needed to contemplate subjects for a long time. If you have your corporeal needs taken care of, then you can go on to think about stuff. The Church offered that.

Having said all of this, there were, of course, plenty of Jewish and Muslim scholars at work in medieval Europe as well. The thriving Jewish communities of the medieval period had their own complex theological discussions about the Talmud, and produced their own truly delightful sexual and scientific theory that I will never tire of reading.

I’ve also talked at length about how Islamic medical advances were very much taken on board by medieval Christians in Europe. The fact that the Christians in holy orders beavering away at the medical faculties of universities across Europe were very much looking to a Muslim guy called Ibn Sinna for medical knowledge makes it hard to see the Church as an oppressive hater of all things non-Catholic. I’m just saying.

What else is at play here? Meh, society writ large. A lot of us in the English as a first language speaking world, and in northern Europe more generally have been raised in a Protestant context even if we ourselves are not Protestant. The thing about that is Protestants, famously, is that they are not huge fans of the Church. Big news, I know. In the Early Modern period this could get kinda wild, with things like the Great Fire of London being blamed on a nefarious “Papish plot”, for example, becoming a nice early example of a conspiracy theory. (That conspiracy theory was still written in Latin at the based of The Monument built to commemorate the fire until 1830 when the Catholics were officially emancipated in Britain. LOL.)

When the whole Enlightenment thing went down, generalised distrust of Catholics was then later compounded by the fact that “serious” thinkers aka Voltaire’s ridiculously basic self began to categorise the accumulation of knowledge specifically in opposition to religious thought. This is the old “Age of Reason” which we currently allegedly reside in, versus the “Age of Faith” idea. The Church as an overarching institution from the age of faith was therefore thought of as necessarily regressive, and it became assumed that it has always been actively attempting to thwart advantage for vaguely sinister reasons that are never fully articulated.

…Now, plenty of people were killed for witchcraft because they were doing medicine. The witch trials were a very real thing, and you know when and where they happened? In the modern period, and usually with a greater regularity in Protestant places. Witchcraft trials peak in general from about 1560-1630 which is the modern period. The most famous trials with the biggest kill count took place in Trier, Fulda, Basque, Wurtzburg, Bamberg, North Berwick, Torsåker and Salem. You know what was going on in most of the places? The Reformation. Witch trials sort of reflected various confessions of Christianity’s ability to effectively protect their flocks from evil. Did Catholics kill “witches” oh you bet your sweet ass they did. So did Protestants, and it was all fucking ugly.

What is important to note is that in countries where Catholicism was static witch trials were largely unheard of. Ireland, the Iberian Peninsula, and Italy, for example, just didn’t go in for them even though they were theoretically in the clutches of a nefarious Church bent on destroying all medical knowledge or something.

Now, none of this is to excuse the multifarious sins of the institutional Church over the years. In many ways my entire career as a medieval historian is a product of the fact that I was frustrated with the Church after 16 years of Catholic school. If you had to go to a High School named after the prosecutor in the Galileo trial, you might also end up devoting yourself to picking intricate theological fights with the Church, OK? (Yes, this is my origin story.)

And that brings us to the crux of the matter: if you make up a bunch of stuff that the Church did not do it makes it harder to critique them of the manifold things they actually did do and are doing right fucking now. We need to be critiquing the Magdalene Laundries; the international cover up of pedophile priests; signing an actual concordant with Nazi Germany; the regressive attitudes towards abortion and contraception that happen still, now, and endanger the lives of countless women. All of this is real, and calls for the strongest possible condemnation.”

- Eleanor Janega, “JFC, calm down about the medieval Church.”

#medieval #religion #education

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harristops · 3 years

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I get that Ash has a "idgaf about what people think attitude" but she's a really sensitive person and she cares deeply about what people think about her. Sometimes in her 2016-2017 TWLOHA era she would say some really almost self-deprecating things? Like about how she disappointed a lot of people, or how she felt like she was a disappointment to people. I can't help but wonder if she feels like she let people down after getting dropped from the roster, like her family and stuff? She spoke so much about how much this job has taken from her, from missing big events, and I wonder if she ever feels like she couldn't show for it because she didn't make it to that level.

Obvs I'm probably projecting but I feel really bad for her because I worry what she would go through if she didn't have AK and her chosen family. It must really suck that people can't even appreciate your high moments because they just want to tear you down at every opportunity they have - almost like you just can't win no matter what.

Anyways, I just feel for her. She's shared so much of her life with us and I almost wish she didn't - at least that way she could avoid the hate and criticism. But then I get it, she's a pure soul who wants to be that positive representation and she is, but I can't help but wonder how much it burdens her mental health because I'd hate it myself.

I'm gonna answer these both in the same ask because they're very similar and also really well put and deserve to be spotlighted.

These are both really valid points when considering the cellie Ash did today. I don't know what her intentions were behind it or if it was truly just copying Memphis, but if it was deeper and really about blocking out the haters or the non-believers, then this makes me worried for her because it means at some level she is listening and is taking it all in.

Ash would never stoop low and be spiteful but her silence on the USWNT after her post is telling. She has been with this organization for more than half of her life. I believe she was in with the youth national teams since she was thirteen and just kept climbing her way into the senior national team. She dedicated her whole life to the sport with the intention of going somewhere big. Of course, there's never any guarantee that you get a spot, but surely with that much training and time spent in and out of camps, you would want to make something out of her work?

Her journey wasn't an easy one and when she speaks about her past and the shame and guilt she carried and how she always struggled with a type of depression (a side note, I'm only a clinical student and not a registered psychologist but Ash always did give off the vibe that she probably has an undiagnosed general anxiety disorder and/or major depressive disorder, or is sub threshold at the very least). She used to mention not being able to look at herself in the mirror and how she struggled with getting out of bed and her shame/guilt. I agree she definitely had a lot of self-deprecating moments in 2016/2017 and I can only hope that these moments are few and far between now she has her family. I mean that whole year was really tough for her and she was really going through it but yeah she was saying and liking some really worrying things and I was scared for her a bit. It's great she is so vocal about her mental health but sometimes people take way too much and run with it and it backfires.

I feel for her because you're both right, she may be hard on the outside but she is so in tune with her emotions and I have no doubt the sting of being left off the roster despite having arguably the best season of her career so far is a huge blow and honestly really humiliating. She's the main reason the Pride are so high up in the standings, Vlatko said he would reward club performances, but it just looks he didn't even care to give her a shot or justify why he left her off the list.

I just am so glad she has someone like Ali who is so vocal about supporting her and adamantly letting everyone know that Ash's absence from the Tokyo roster is a massive slap in the face for her wife who honestly worked her ass off harder than any of the other USWNT keepers aside from AD.

I know she probably learned to filter out the hate, but knowing how deeply she cares about her impact on others lives, I worry that she does still internalize some of the things that are said or speculated about her privately and but never shows it publically.

#asks #It helps to have commentators like kaylyn kyle the no 1 Ash stan tho #At least getting some credit somewhere and justifying her performances

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madsdefencesquad · 4 years

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It's frustrating that the majority of this is us fans online now think Madison is selfish, unreasonable and asking Kevin to give up his acting career. Like did we watch the same episode? And is it obvious that this reaction to Madison was not the writers' intention at all. Even producer K.J. Steinberg had to defend Madison to an interviewer about being selfish. Because they seemed to have turned alot of the online audience against Madison, it seems like they will have to put in a lot of work to

I cannot even BEGIN to tell you how much I erupted at the general audience absolutely ripping Mads for this episode when she did not show a single shred of selfishness in this episode. Like not one! Of course, one can argue that there are some things that can be re-worded or whatever but the overall message is still very apparent. * SIGHS * In saying that though, I do have some thoughts on Kevin which we’ll discuss below (warning: it’s gonna get looooong LOL)

Kevin gets a call that shooting has changed locations to Vancouver and he refuses to go because of his commitment to Madison and their kids despite it obviously destroying him.

Like, look at how devastated he is. And then he turns around and tries to hide his devastation but Madison sees through it and she calls him out by asking him what the hell has happened and he explains why, and what does Madison do?!!

She PUSHES him to go despite knowing that she has entered her last trimester, the most crucial part in a pregnancy because hellooooooo she can give birth any time now (!!!!). Like, Madison knows Kevin so well that if he doesn’t finish the movie that means so much to him and that he’s worked so hard for, then he’ll just be miserable, and Madison doesn’t want that for him because she cares about him. LIKE SO MUCH SO THAT SHE SACRIFICES HAVING HIM THERE WHEN SHE NEEDS HIM THE MOST aspodihsfjkl

Like this is her after she lets him go. Madison literally only had to give him a quick kiss and a “Go on and pack” and Kevin, for his part, didn’t even hesitate nor try to fight her that he should stay because he knows that he should. He just went!! And look, I’m not trying to gripe on Kevin here but he could have at least shown even just a tad resistance despite Madison’s logical argument, but let’s not get into that now...

BUT what I will go over is THE POINTS MADE by Randall when it came to Kevin and taking care of people and being committed to them.

Let me point out this particular gem in Season 4, episode 16 between Randall and Kevin when it came to taking care of Rebecca and knowing what was best for her. Randall says,

“And how’s that Kev? Because of all the times you’ve been spending with her for the past few weeks? Because you took her to one doctor’s appointment? I’ve been taking care of mom for twenty years... We both know at any minute, you can take off for Morrocco and do a movie...”

Now look, we can rationalise either one of the brother’s sides in this confrontation, but we cannot take away the truth from Randall’s words here. If we replaced it with Madison’s situation, then this is what we’ll have:

Quarantining together, Kevin’s been taking care of Madison for a few months, about 4-6 give or take, and has been there for her during some appointments (I say “some” because COVID has changed things), and he obviously has been of great help to her mentally, emotionally and physically. However, Kevin has not known Madison for longer than two years and even now, they’re still getting to know each other. But Madison obviously has known herself all her life. And because of COVID, we know that Kevin hasn’t exactly been working, but now that he is, ooop Randall’s words about Kevin having to go and jet off at any minute actually occurs... Kevin has to go to Vancouver in just hours notice.

Even though Kevin thrives at taking care of other people and he’s really good at it, Kevin still hasn’t grasped what it means to truly devote themselves to someone sacrificially. And I mean, putting someone else’s needs before his.

Let’s go to the very controversial argument in the s4 finale where Randall says:

“How dare you pretend that you give a rat’s ass about what anyone else wants other than you? You want mom to spend more time with the family because you want mom to decide with you. You, you, you.”

Now, this line is really crucial in Kevin and Madison’s “argument” in the bedroom. Of course, Randall’s words are much harsher but there’s a truth there: when Kevin proposes his jet-setting family idea to Madison, his persuasion technique is to glam it up (”what about private jet-setting all over the world”) to almost entice Madison to decide with him with what he wants/pictures. AND when Madison reminds him of his commitment to her and the kids, Kevin goes for the offense of “I didn’t realise that where we live was as important as being a family.”

Of course, one can argue that yes Kev, home is where the heart is blah blah, but the point here is Kevin wasn’t taking into consideration what the other person wants, and in this case what Madison wants/pictures, exactly what Randall was saying before.

And then Randall goes:

“You have no idea what you’re talking about, Kevin. You have no idea what it means to actually take care of people... I stayed and took care of our family... you’ll never know what it’s like to devote yourself to anyone other than yourself.”

Now, the meaty bit. Yes, over the seasons we’ve seen Kevin grow and mature and develop. Yes, we’ve seen him devote himself to the betterment of Nicky. BUT, we have not actually seen him show the kind of sacrificial devotion/commitment that Randall was talking about when it comes to taking care of a family, and in this case their own family.

Randall sacrificed his dreams of going to a college that he wanted so badly to go to because he knew that his mother needed him. That he couldn’t leave her alone. That her needs came first... at least for then. But because he was so devoted and committed to taking care of his mother, Randall not only graduated and became successful afterwards, he also got the best of them all: Beth.

Now, with Kevin. Madison is Kevin’s opportunity to DO WHAT RANDALL DID (”What would Randall do?” right, Kev?) for his own family.

Madison wasn’t selfishly asking him to quit acting for her or for the kids, she was asking him to think through his commitment, his all in, and what that actually truly means for him in the context of the above (my girl @thesocietalmisfit made a more eloquent post here).

The writers are telling us to focus on Kevin, to not take our eyes off him because he’s in a pivotal moment now: will he change and finally make decisions for other people apart from himself or will he not and stay the same and lose those whom he cares for and loves?

Anywayy, I’m sorry this took such a long turn, I just really needed to get that out of my chest. But as far as the audience is concerned and how the writers need to do a lot more work to turn people around into going for Madison I have two thoughts:

1. Hating on Madison in this episode for the number of ridiculous reasons all stemming from a form of misogyny yeah I went there, shows that the general TIU demographic are the kinds of people, who needs to be spoon fed information/nuance/implication and sometimes even just what’s right in front of them that they still somehow miss. And I’m sorry, but if you fall in this category, then you’re not going to enjoy not just the development of Kevison’s journey but the others’ also. Remember how much flack Kate was getting for being “awful” at Toby but this one ep of her going full queen of empowerment and everyone’s suddenly Team Kate? Yeah, the audience is fickle. And look, there will always be haters, and haters gonna hate for no reason (or the most absurd), so the writers can’t do much about that.

2. There’s a reason why they’re showing us Kevison already at this very important cross-roads in as early as episode 3 and now 5 and that’s because they’ve got all the loved-up, full romantic Kevison (that they know is the greatest appeal to the audience) coming. I really don’t doubt it. So many people turned into Kevison fans literally after watching them be all adorbs in the premiere and in ep 3 when they were all vulnerable. IMAGINE when they’re actually showing them fully in love with each other + being dedicated parents? THE. SERVE.

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wet-hot-phantom-summer · 3 years

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can i get some words of encouragement? ive just seen quite a few hate posts recently and its kind of draining

Absolutely, nonny <3

First and foremost, everyone should know there's nothing wrong with enjoying smut content for any fandom. Doesn't matter why you enjoy it, doesn't matter if you like creating it or just looking at it--there is nothing wrong with you. We like what we like, and fandom is a safe space to explore whatever that might mean, in whatever capacity we prefer.

Always remember that you are more than someone's negative opinions about you. Their opinions are worthless, and do not mean anything truthful about no matter how loud they might shout about it. People are entitled to like whatever they like, and dislike whatever they dislike, but people who make hate posts and who send mean anons and so on are pathetic, sad individuals.

Imagine dedicating so much of your waking energy to being hateful and mean and demonizing something other people enjoy? Imagine expending so much time and effort to do so loudly and publicly? It's just a sad existence to live.

Fanworks are amazing, incredible things. No matter what the content is, that is time and effort well spent. Time and effort and energy spent making something, bringing something new into the world, that's admirable and cool and you are all so incredible for doing so.

Don't let the asshats get you down. There will always be people who believe in censorship, and purity policing; there will always be people who lack the life experience and understanding to realize why people create what they create. Doesn't make you a bad person for creating things, or liking things that others create.

Whenever you can, block them and move on. Create more stuff. Bury those hate posts in the tags by filling the tags with content instead. Don't let the haters get you down.

Hope this helps, nonny!

#mod post #replies #anti fandom wank #fandom positivity

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x--daughters-of-darkness--x · 4 years

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I TALKED TO AMY LEE OF EVANESCENCE ABOUT INSPIRING THE WORLD’S WORST FANFICTION

The singer of My Immortal (the song) has now read My Immortal (the fanfic)

If you mention the name “My Immortal,” you may mean one of two things. The first is the 2003 hit song from rock band Evanescence. The second is a Harry Potter fanfic so transcendentally, mysteriously bad that it’s transfixed the internet for years.

The fanfic My Immortal is about a time-traveling mall-goth teenage vampire wizard (named “Ebony Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way”) who is obsessed with Evanescence and a variety of goth-inflected rock bands. She’s supposed to look like Amy Lee, Evanescence’s lead vocalist, pianist, and songwriter. And to this day, nobody is sure who wrote the story or whether they were serious.

Back in the real world, Lee and the rest of Evanescence have spent months under stay-at-home orders during the coronavirus pandemic. They’ve used that time to film two music videos in collaboration with director P.R. Brown, each shot by band members and their families. The latest is a surreal video for “The Game Is Over,” a song from their upcoming album The Bitter Truth. In Lee’s words, it’s shot as a “psychological thriller,” full of imagery based on a specific fear or inner demon from each member.

These videos — filmed in living rooms, cars, and other personal spaces — give fans a new kind of look into the band members’ lives. But I was curious about a different kind of fan relationship: did the creators of “My Immortal” know about My Immortal? I spoke to Lee, and the answer is yes; in fact, it’s part of a long-running family joke. She’d never actually read it, however, until last week.

You’ve made two videos under quarantine, and they’ve taken very different approaches. What was the process behind each of them?

We really had to just think kind of quickly. We were working on another video treatment that would have been full-production, this whole deal with a big crew and things we could no longer have because of the pandemic — including the fact that we couldn’t even physically get together because we live all over the world.

We recognized that “Wasted on You” had a bunch of lyrical content that felt like all of a sudden where we were. So we went for that. I really wanted it to be real on a level like people hadn’t seen us before: in our own homes, in our real lives, not dressed up, not in makeup, just the real, raw us.

For the second one, it’s like “Okay, how do we take what we’ve learned and amp it up even more to make it look like a real video more than just us being ourselves?” We have all been very serious about the lockdown, so we have been completely alone for the most part during this time — and that is cool in some ways as a creator. But you really have to live with yourself all the time.

A few of us have gone through some difficult things in the past few years. [Bassist Tim McCord] and I both experienced losses in our immediate family. There’s just been a lot of hard. So you know when you’re finally forced to stop being distracted by all the things that keep us happy, there’s silence — and that stuff comes out. So each of us had a private kind of gut-spilling confession with [P.R. Brown] about what we’re struggling with.

We were just sharing deeply in a way that we don’t normally go all the way with when it comes to at least our visuals. When I pour my lyrics into my music, it’s always really raw. But in this, it’s like, we’re not going to hold back on the video side and just make it beautiful — we’re going to go for it and let it be ugly and share the dark parts of ourselves.

I think of a lot of your music as being open and vulnerable, and you interact with fans online. What does filming a video at home like this communicate that your normal social media presence and music don’t?

I hope it just shows more and more of that willingness to be vulnerable because as hard as it is, it always leaves me feeling more satisfied than just putting on a pretty face.

Social media’s such a weird world for me. I love it — I’m grateful for the idea that we can have a direct relationship with our fans. But it’s kind of a double-edged sword. It’s such an open platform for everybody to criticize everything about you. And when you go there, you’re going to see that. I think that’s true for everybody. It doesn’t matter if you’re a celebrity or not. It’s just a place where people don’t have to show their face to say things, and there’s a lot of ugly out there.

What’s your relationship specifically with fanworks? Do people send you things that were inspired by you?

Oh my god, it’s so wonderful. We’ve got so much art. I’ve got this huge collection of stuff that I’ve been hanging on to just from the beginning. There are so many talented people out there that pour their efforts into making a piece of visual art that is either of something in the Evanescence world or just something else that came out of them while they were listening to our music.

Then there are other things that you have to keep because they’re so hilariously funny. People will make a crazy poem that makes totally no sense but I’m a character within it, which is awesome. It’s like, I know this person’s like 12 years old and totally sincere, but this is so funny. I have a little studio, and I dedicated a little bit of time during our unexpected free time to cover it wall-to-wall in the bathroom with all the fan stuff.

Which brings me to my next question: had you ever heard of My Immortal?

I think for quite a while I was just unaware of it. And then my cynical, Reddit-loving younger sister who’s also an English teacher, somewhere during the holiday every year when the family’s all together, it’ll come up for some reason. And she’s like, “Wait — you still haven’t read My Immortal?” And I’m like, “No, what do you mean?” She’s like, “You have to. Okay, hold on. Let me read you an excerpt.” And then she’ll pull up her phone and read some awesome paragraph from the craziest, funniest thing ever that makes no sense.

It’s one of her favorite things that she thinks is the most hilarious thing in the world, and I still just kept not reading it. It’s been kind of this ongoing joke with us. And then I got a call a few days ago that you wanted to talk about it, so I was like, “Oh, crap. I have to read a little bit of it.”

I read I think not quite half of it, but it did have me in tears. I was laughing really, really hard at one point, just because of the nonsense. And then I started asking myself, is this real? I can’t quite tell. I’m totally undecided. Is it sincere? I feel like it started maybe as sincere, but they got in on it and started playing it up for the haters. I can’t tell! What do you think?

It would have to be so elaborate, but there are a bunch of cases that really make it seem like this person knows much, much more than the character they’re putting on.

I noticed a misspelling that was like, instead of triumphantly, it was “triumelephantly.” And I was like, come on, you don’t think “elephant” is inside “triumphant.” There’s no way.

At one point, the main character’s name is spelled two different ways within three words of each other.

I totally saw that, too! I’m torn because I want it to be sincere, kind of... but I don’t know.

There are things about it that aren’t cool to talk about. Like it’s not funny to talk about slitting your wrists. So it takes me a second to get past that joke, which is so recurring.

Yeah, if you go back to old internet culture, a lot of it is really ugly. And it’s weird trying to separate that stuff out.

Is it better now?

I don’t know because now I’m too old to know what’s going on. But kids do seem nicer. They often seem nicer.

I would like to believe we’ve grown up a little bit as a society from that. Maybe everybody having a little bit more of a microphone has taught us some things that we need to be aware of that are outside of our perception and our personal experiences. There are other people that are seeing that in a different way. I think it would be cool if that’s true.

I was a teenager around when My Immortal came out, and it feels like it describes a very recognizable “goths versus preps” rivalry. Did you feel that?

I think this thing is poking fun at that world — I mean it would have to be, come on — and that part of it really resonates with me in a real way. But I didn’t consider myself goth! Part of what’s weird and funny is like okay, this is describing hating the preps, and you’re the cool one, you’re the underground, you understand real life and the gravity of death, and I get it. But if you’re so depressed and everything’s so hard and you’re so real and they’re so fake, why do you put so much effort into your look?

That was what always turned me off about the word “goth” when that started being assigned to me in our early days. If I was 15 years old and you’d asked me what I was, I’m grunge. I buy all my clothes at garage sales, I don’t do crap to my look, I get ready two seconds before school, and all the preps are the ones who put all their focus on their looks and what party they’re going to go to.

But yeah, that part was funny to me. That part existed.

I love the idea of you knowing about this thing for years without having read it.

I kind of want to thank you because I did get a really good laugh out of it last night. It’s not like, when I have free time, I’m motivated to go read some horribly bad thing. But it’s actually pretty interesting.

And you’ve gotta love all the characters breaking into song to sing My Chemical Romance songs. It’s pretty great.

#Amy Lee #Evanescence #2020 interviews

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