#and beyond whatever you perceive their relationship to be

[river-of-wine]

Can I say something. I think that a lot of the time the discussions about Dutch and Hosea often diminish Hosea’s actual character and importance in the story as his own person with his own personality, motivations and role in the narrative of the game

[yorsgirl]

Yan!Heian!Sukuna and with Y/N?

Lately, whenever Darling got pregnant she ended up having countless miscarriages, the longest lasting at least 3 months, Sukuna began to suspect these countless coincidences.

He doesn't care about these losses since he didn't want to share Y/N with some brat, but he found it very strange that every time she got pregnant resulted in a miscarriage, so he started investigating and finally found out why this was happening.

He discovered that Y/N was causing her own miscarriages, as she knew that the last thing the world needed was Sukuna's descendants, so he finally confronts her but with that damn psychological terror that he loves to do to her.

Oh my, I love love love this idea!!

I kinda went out on this one, but I hope I did justice to what you were aiming at. Hope you like it :) Also I am sorry for being so late

Playing God

Yandere!Ryomen Sukuna x Fem!Reader

Synopsis: It was a gamble, he was willing to make. To keep you with him, forever, as he wanted. Needed. You had to realize that no other heaven except his arms would be comforting. Even if that meant, breaking your very soul.

Tropes: Dark Romance, horror, angst

Warnings: Implied nsfw(forced), mentions of pregnancy, miscarriage, abduction, cannibalism and isolation. Trauma, mild stockholm syndrome, yandere themes, minor character death(s), gore, gaslighting, manipulation, misogyny, blood, degradation(non-kinky), patriarchal society, unhealthy relationship, implied child birth.

General warnings: Yandere!True form!Husband!Sukuna, Wife!Reader, Heian Era, both Sukuna and reader are a red flag on their own, usage of nicknames, no mentions of y/n.

Word Count: 9.7k

You were digging your own grave.

So you shouldn't have been surprised that your wish would be granted. Yet, if you could have one wish then you'd wish for freedom but no- freedom was a forfeited dream, far beyond your reach. Consideration of that one would never be fruitful. You are trapped even in your dreams.

Playing with fire only gets you burnt.

For long, you played this game and this- this was your compensation. For everything you had done until now, all you are returned with was abandonment. Not that supposedly, betrayal, yes. More appropriate.

Flames surrounded you, crawling up your skin, the screams piercing your ears, your chest heaved up and down. Gaze, once settled on your hearth, now all you saw was the burning hut, the crackling of embers reached your ears. Attire and hands stained with blood of the insolent. The warning shouldn't have been taken lightly. Should have known, the extent of his power.

Eyes held terror, fright, regret- whatever you could name. The multitude of names you received seemed no more than a distant dream, nowhere to be found. All were running away - expectable.

You expected calamity, but you were calm.

Everything went down in flames. Save for you, you weren't burning. Not an spark touched your skin. Was it the distance or the control? Who knows. But one confirmation which you held was that tonight you won't die. Not so soon either.

Careful, not all Gods are worshipped.

The words rang in your ears and as if on cue, you found him again.

In this reverie of madness, he held your sight when you attempted to turn - the eyes tinted with crimson.

.

"I am sorry for your loss, m'lady."

You had seen it all.

You had your fair share of encounters, received news and such. Women losing their mind and sanity after delivered with a news this devastating. Notably, no woman would feel any bliss after knowing that they had lost their child. Lost the chance of motherhood before experiencing it. Violent outbursts was the most probable outcome.

"This is a hard time," The midwife spoke softly. "Yet, you shouldn't neglect your health."

You perceived the softness to be fear. She must have had dealt with situations like these, most of them traumatizing as you assumed. Perhaps, she expected the same from you too.

You tore your gaze off her, leaning back on your bedframe, "I'd like to be left alone."

Your declaration was answered with compliance. Offering a humble bow, she bid you farewell, walking out of your chambers. Once her footsteps seized, you finally let your guard down. Breathing out a sigh of relief, you laid back down on your bed.

"Good riddance," You muttered to yourself. Moments of such vulnerability wasn't rare, considering you were served with loneliness, lately. Save for the times you spent in the presence of Sukuna. His decree, one might say. Your attention shouldn't be wasted on anyone but him. You scoffed recalling his words. Involuntarily, you stroked your belly, the corner of your lip curled up.

Once a house to life, given by your husband; now lay vacant from your doing.

A twisted sense of pride swelled up in your chest, a wide grin stretching on your face. You were successful in your quest, again. Mercilessly, you uprooted the seed of your husband's lineage.

Perhaps, you've truly gone sick.

Yet, this revolt of feelings were miles lesser than the repugnant you encountered when you realized your first pregnancy. You were on the brink of clawing out the creature growing in your womb. You'd have torn it apart with while revelling in the joy of watching its blood drip down on the face of Earth. If not for Sukuna's presence in the room, you might've gone through it.

You lost a fragment of yourself, that day.

Throwing up countless times, dizziness, nausea, even losing your consciousness while walking down. No, they weren't pregnancy side effects. More so, the outcome of the stress accumulating in you.

Sickening. His kin you'd have cradled in your body. To be born and grow up into a revolting, merciless creature like his father. To take up place in your womb, your flesh and blood and combining with his – a living proof of your plight. Disgusting.

Never. You'd never let that happen.

You'd never succumb to such monstrosity.

You had already given up your freedom, your dignity, your alight life to Sukuna in exchange of the lives you held dear. The lives back in your ancestral village, home to your kin.

You were affirmed. An heir of Ryomen Sukuna would never be birthed from you.

Speak of the devil, he appears.

An overwhelming familiar aura surrounded your very being, the doors to your chamber slid open, your captor, your husband strolled inside. Even his mere presence held the malevolence in him. You attempted to rise from your position at his arrival.

"Sit." He commanded.

You silently obeyed his order, keeping your gaze settled on your lap, the energy had your stomach churning with trepidation; at times when you didn't do anything either. And this time, you were guilty. Two moments passed in silence until he spoke.

"I heard from the midwife."

You took in a sharp breath, swallowing a lump in your throat. It was the same ordeal, like the first two times. Yet, you were a tad bit calm since the previous encounters. Probably, due to the fact you were getting used to this role. In this past moons, you had developed into the wife, he was carving you out to be. Giving him just the reactions he wanted, for that saved you a lot of anguish and pain. Even if it came at the price of your self-respect. This was the only way.

With your head hung low, you spoke, "Forgive me, my lord. I am incapable of bearing you an heir. I-It must have been my fau-"

"Not another word."

You instantly stiffened up, his deep voice causing chills to run down your spine. Did you make an error? Was he aware of your tumultuous acts? Was the play not convincing enough?

He held your chin, forcing you to look up at him. All of his four, red eyes bore into you. You bit on your inner cheek, blood coursing in your veins - steadfast.

They say, your fear start to vanish once you've remained in the source of their vicinity too long. That statement is false. For even after staying with your captor for almost two years, you still held your fear.

"The one at fault bore consequences."

That's when you were hit with the faint stench of blood from him. Another one perished. You took the wild guess of it being the midwife. However, instead of amplifying fright, it was lessened. You wouldn't be on the receiving end of his wrath.

"You aren't at fault, wife."

Oh, but you were.

Sukuna held your gaze, cupping your cheek; the rough pad of his thumb trailed a line on your skin. His tone and grip were surprisingly gentle. "There's no need to apologize."

The corners of your eyes crinkled down, you lean into his touch. You assume, it's a good move as you noted the flicker of emotion in his eyes. "It's the third time, my lord. Perhaps, I bear some shortcomings."

"What nonsense," He rolled his eyes. "There's none, not in my eyes. Don't fill your head with such fickle thoughts." He paused for a moment before continuing, "Is that understood?"

He wasn't one for affirmations but maybe- just maybe it was his attempt at comfort, you supposed. The previous losses must had him learning, the threads of condolence. Still, for you, they'd never mean anything less than empty words. The last thing you wanted was to be comforted by your tormentor. You'd rather step into hell willingly.

But you were living under his wing. You have to play according to his whims. You nodded. "Yes, my lord."

His hand left your face, dropping to his thigh. He looked at you, as if sizing you up. You had to keep yourself from making any unnecessary movements. Sukuna wanted you composed, whatever the situation. (Except the times when he bedded you, you were allowed to scream, cry and thrash around then. Cause you were trapped under his immense strength, struggles were futile).

After a while, he asked, "Any wishes?"

You chewed on your bottom lip, eyes flickering down then back to him. You let out a breath, before continuing. "May I visit the shrine... this evening?"

Silence.

You were contemplating whether you had offended him, somehow. Previously, he did allow for your little trips, you wondered if his patience was running thin cause of your repeated incapability of bearing him an heir. Maybe, you ran out of luck.

You were about to mutter an apology but then a smug grin spread across his lips, "Why so?" He asked.

"To-" You swallowed a lump, preparing to answer the practiced dialogue. "To offer prayers for–"

"Why grieve for someone who didn't even take form?" He cut you up, raising an eyebrow. For a tad moment, he sounded curious. It broke into a cruel chuckle, "You humans would make a funeral out of anything, yes?"

If you held an ounce of sympathy then you wouldn't question.

You wanted to say but you knew better. Besides, you still have to keep up the act of being his loyal wife. Heaving a out a deep breath, you replied, "I suppose." You paused, running the tip of your tongue over your lip.

"I'd pray that I can bear you an heir the next time, my lord."

Nay, more so: I'd pray that you receive your end soon, my lord.

Sukuna watched you. No, not look. He watched, like a predator. Then, his lips cracked into a sinister grin. "You've a way with your words, wife."

It caught you off guard. You raised an eyebrow, attempting to voice out your confusion. "What do-"

"I will accompany you."

.

"Sukuna sama, the herbalist you asked for, has arrived."

Sukuna spared a glance at Uraume, who knelt by his feet.

"Bring him."

As on cue, they rose up from their stance, pivoting around towards the door. It parted, two curses had a man in their grasp as he struggled to break free. His eyes widening with terror when it fell on the King, sitting atop his throne.

The man was pushed down to his knees, face meeting the floor in a loud slam. His scuffles were in vain against such power, he knew that. Still, in a situation of life and death, rationality takes it's leave.

Sukuna clicked his tongue in annoyance. All he wanted was some herbalist to answer the flurry of questions in his which had him restless for the past few days. Did this scum think he'd be killed? Maybe he would be, if he deems it necessary or he proves to be useless.

What had him restless was your miscarriages. Counting the most recent would make it a fourth. Where did he go wrong? You were kept in utmost luxury, no toils whatsoever. Still, what was wrong?

—》《—

"Perhaps, there's some faults in her highness."

"Keep your voice down, Mira. Someone may hear you."

"I am a lot quite... but tell me, don't you find it strange? How come she has lost all of her children?"

"I- I suppose. Perhaps, motherhood is not written in her fate."

"Or so, she's simply incapable."

—》《—

Safe to say, those were the last words they uttered before they were turned into a mash of flesh and blood.

Sliced into pieces that even trying to make a proper corpse out of the remnants weren't possible.

At times, Sukuna wished he held the power to bring back someone to life. Then maybe, he'd have given those servants a death, more worthy. Maybe, ripping out their limbs, piece by piece. First the bones would break, ripped from the ligaments, then it'd be the muscles; that was easy to just tear out. And after that happened, he could have just sewn up the blobs of flesh again and repeat the process until they learn their lesson or the life leaves them again.

He deduced the latter would be more probable. Still, it would be fine. They deserved that.

Speaking ill of you in his palace, in his vicinity, in his world was prohibited. A sin, in the words of humans. And a sin never goes unpunished.

You - his consort, his queen, you were heavenly. There isn't a fault in you, it's some external factor, must be. But he can't let go of his growing suspicion either.

Sukuna detested children, it was a known fact. Always ending their lives first, whenever he set foot in a village. They were of no use to him, unless they were served to him on his platter. He couldn't deny, their flesh was flavourful.

Even though, he held great disdain for them, he couldn't help but desire a kinship with you. With the price of letting go of your undivided attention? Hmm, doesn't sound too great. He assumed, he can hire a wet nurse just in case. Still, he desired to see you round with his child, feet swollen as you struggled to walk around. You do not have to worry, he, your husband would joyfully oblige in carrying you in his arms. You were more than perfect, he couldn't even imagine just how beautiful you'll look, during and after carrying your child.

It was destined. You'd extend his lineage or no one else.

You were flawless then why were you causing such errors? Contradicting. It was his question until he started to take a note in your behaviour, and he found–

Sukuna stood up from his throne, walking down the steps of bones, presumably of the ones he killed. They act as a pretty show piece, according to him.

The court resonated with his footsteps, each one carrying a promise of death. The man's struggles seized once he was harshly pulled up by his hair, his eyes met with Sukuna's.

"Yo-your high–ness," The man fumbled with his words, a spine chilling sensation going down his frame.

"Time's wasting," Sukuna said, his glare pointed. The fury evident, though his exterior was calm. "Comply if you don't wish death."

The man nodded frequently, his fingertips trembled with anticipation and horror. "Ye-yes, your highness. It's an honour to s-serve you." The man fell to his feet as he was dropped. Sukuna dismissed the extra company with a wave of his hand.

"Rise," He declared.

The man still on his knees, raises his head. "What can I- I do for you, your highness?"

—》《—

"May I make a request, my lord?"

Sukuna's eyes flickered to you, yours not meeting his. Knelt before him, you gracefully poured the sake in his ochoko.

"Speak."

He marked the squinting in your irises, fingertips trembled when you put the vessel down. Your shoulders rose and fell before you gazed at him, reluctantly. He couldn't help but find your antics inhumanely amusing. 

"Would you be kind enough... to bring me this-" You paused for a fleeting moment. "This herb called... aloe vera?"

—》《—

"Aloe vera," Sukuna tilted his head aside, the upper pair of arms crossed over his chest. "What use does it have?"

"We-well, my lord it's used for heal-healing purposes, burns, cuts, rashes... it heals injuries, yes." He answered, taking a gulp. There was other uses too yet his head was alike a blank canvas, before such a formidable strength. He wasn't even aware if it was satisfactory or why the King of Curses needed to know about such a measly plant. But if it meant he could see the sun for another day then he'll just give whatever he could offer. "I-It can also be used to– to make me-medicated food. N-not a delicacy... I might add."

Sukuna raised an eyebrow, "That's it?"

"N-no, my lord. There- it can cure diges-"

"In pregnancy."

The man stiffened, his mouth parting a tad bit. A whisper leaving his lips, "Yo-your highness...?"

Pregnancy, menstruation, considered taboo. A matter regarding women, spoken in the inner chambers, the men should remain ignorant. A topic whispered in ears not spoken aloud in any hall, let alone the royal court. Certainly, Sukuna was aware of this societal construct, yet he didn't care. The society and its idiotic rules could go to hell. He just needed answers.

"Speak," Sukuna's voice was louder, deeper when the man before him fidgeted in his spot due to discomfort - on speaking such a topic.

"It-Its a... your highness, I d-don't think you-"

"Insolent bastard," His fumbling was interrupted by Sukuna. The warning evident in his profanity. His face grew darker, the four irises glowing with impending danger akin Satan himself. "If you so much as want to live, fucking speak."

The man's blood ran cold as on cue, face turning a shade paler as if winter had started to pool in. Tears prickled the corners of his eyes, "Forgive me, your highness! I will speak, I will- yes- aloe vera its-" He heaved out a deep breath, an attempt to slow down his beating heart. "Any fo-form of it is ill-suited during pregnancy... it can cause... cause pe-pelvic haemorrhage leading to... to  misc-"

"Miscarriage?"

"Yes, miscarriage... can lead to miscarriage, your highness."

A profound silence prevailed. Not a soul spoke neither was a footstep heard. Not a leaf rustled or the howling winds tapped on the window pane - assumed, mother nature had halted its elements from making any noise.

The stakes were high yet an flicker of courage alighted in the man as he raised his head up to glance at Sukuna, "My lor-"

The man's head tumbled down before he could even complete.

He couldn't scream, he couldn't beg, he couldn't apologize, he couldn't even blink. All he could do was watch. Watch as his beheaded body fell limp before his eyes. Watch as the blood poured out like waterfalls staining the carpet with its hues. The red marred bones protruded out amidst the flesh, globs of blood was gushing out of his severed voice box. His body jerked, the remnants of conscious nerves trying to survive.

It was a neat cut. A heavenly sight.

The world started to blur in. And before he knew it, the light was gone from his eyes.

Sukuna didn't even spare a glance as he marched out of his court.

Uraume approached the body, a few maids accompanying them. They casted a disapproving glare at the corpse.

"Not edible, dispose of it."

.

You didn't see or hear from Sukuna for a week.

He didn't visit your chambers at night neither was he present when you sat down for your meals. Even his energy was alike a hushed whisper which would remind you of his presence in the residence, but not reveal himself to you. For some reason, it had you in an unease.

No, you certainly did not miss his presence. But his absence just made the surroundings almost suffocating. There was the looming threat that something had happened or something were to happen. One worse than the other.

Silence was never uneventful.

Insinuating the courage, you had once inquired Uraume about his absence. Presenting a polite bow, they answered, "Sukuna sama doesn't want to be disturbed."

Disturbed... as if he wasn't the cause of all disturbances. A natural disaster in himself. You resisted the urge to scoff and uttered a meek line of gratitude before going about your day. (That extended with you strolling down the halls or garden or just be in your chambers and read the few books Sukuna had bought you).

On the very same day the dark commenced. While you were mesmerized by the fall of twilight over the garden, you heard his voice.

"Don't you love playing with poison, wife?"

The sudden question made you halt your steps, you weren't even aware that he was present–shielded his aura, presumably. You turned around, raising an eyebrow with bewilderment.

"Pardon, my lord?"

Sukuna snorted, walking up to you, a smirk played on his lips. You had to make the effort of tilting your head to gaze up at him. His towering figure loomed over you, his lower left hand snaking around your waist, pulling you closer to him.

"You love poisons, don't you? Or in your words herbs."

Your shoulders grew rigid, eyes widening with realization, a sharp breath hitting your throat. Your fingertips trembled with anticipation. You were sure to be discreet in your affairs, using the isolation he subjected you to at its best. Yet he knew. It was bad. Very much so. And what were to happen now? What would he do to you?

Another night of horror where your screams would be unheard, your resistance proved to be futile, where you'd be left to suffer alone, where another shard of your remaining soul would be plunged by him. Another night where you'd again play into his whims... Or something more vile, leaving you physically disabled? Perhaps, even death...

The foremost was the most heinous one. You silently prayed that he wouldn't resort to that. If you were to be subjected to his torment then you wished he'd just kill you, liberating you for once and for all. Even so, survival is what the mind wants. Piecing through any tactic just to live another day. The play for now should be denial.

Sukuna's affections for you worked as a double edged sword. You aimed to take advantage of it, in every way possible. You instilled a bit of courage, standing your ground, you spoke "I don't understand what you're trying to instigate, my lord."

He looked down on you, a coy smile uplifting his lips. He threaded his fingers through the knot of your kimono, leaning down next to your ear, he inhaled your scent. His lips brushing over your neck.

"I do not believe so, wife." He murmured, his warm breath hitting your skin, a range of goosebumps rising over your arm. "In fact, I think you clearly know, what I speak about."

Before you could let a word out, he straightened up, turning around, he pushed you to walk with him. His large hand still covering your back.

"Come, let me entertain you."

.

You were walking to the gallows.

Not literally, but you were sure your end was near.

The wooden floors creaked with footfalls. Each step heavier than the previous. You hesitantly glimpsed at Sukuna, his gaze was far ahead. Not a word left his mouth in this while. Only his hold remained firm. He pushed you forward every moment your step faltered.

Your breath hitched when you turned a corner - the right wing. A rule, you could say. Sukuna made it clear since the day he held you captive brought you home – never step a foot in the right wing. Despair drowned your curiosity that time, you didn't question, least bothered to. Even later, you didn't dare to defy him; courtesy to the pain you were subjected to once.

Still, you could make the wild guess of what happened in there. The muffled screams kept you awake at midnight, it was easy to put the puzzle pieces together. There he revelled with the sick pleasure of tormenting your kind.

He stopped before a pair of oak doors. That's when he glanced at you, for the first time in a long while. For a moment, he stared at you with an emotion you couldn't decipher. The next moment, he pulled out the Kanzashi from your hair, letting your strands tousle down.

You flinched, pushing away the curls which clouded your vision. Sukuna held the pin in his hand, holding your gaze. He was unmoving.

What happened to him?

"My lord," You called. "What are you-"

"Stay quiet," He handed you the kanzashi back, adjusting your hand to hold it as if it were a dagger. Turning to the door, he spared you a glance. "Don't speak a word." With that, the doors opened.

Dark.

It was dark save for the light of the lantern which illuminated the room. He shoved you forward, the door locking behind as he stood aside you.

"One bite."

Huh? Bite? What did he mean? You slightly turned your head towards him but you were stopped in your tracks. It wasn't only you and Sukuna in this room, seems you had a guest. More appropriate word? A Captive.

Your eyes were wide open. On the corner of the room, sat a young boy, not more than a adolescent - blindfolded. Restrained by chains, his wrists and ankles were cuffed with metal. A small whimper left his lips as he registered the presence of both of you.

You were about to speak but then his words rang in your mind.

Don't speak a word.

Sukuna gripped your wrist, leading you to the boy, "One bite, in the arm."

He wasn't talking to you. To the boy, he kept his eyes. You marked how the boy flinched. The metals clanking on contact.

He turned to you then, motioning to the pin in your hand then the boy's arm. Realization hit you. You tried to shake your head, refuse; but one glare of his and you were compelled. Reluctantly, you turned around, trudging to the boy.

Something was wrong.

You could feel it. Why... why would he want you to stab this poor boy? A picture of misery, he was. You noted he didn't have any sign of bruises in his body - peculiar. Yet, his fragile state was enough to give you a hint that he had been here for days. Perhaps, starved too. The tension was high and all you wanted was to leave this room, in an instant.

Fine, if Sukuna wanted you to just stab the boy. You'd do it. Missing the vital points which could end his life. One, he said. You'll miss the point and done. Its not upon you that you'd pierce the wrong place. His instructions weren't specific—that'd be your excuse.

He won't die. Not from your hands.

You gently held the boy's arm, angling the pointers on the muscles. You drove it in.

Miscalculation.

The boy's body instantly stiffened, a gut wrenching scream erupted from his mouth. He thrashed around, swinging his legs and arms, his body twitching violently.

You recoiled back soon, yanking out the pin, stepping away on instinct. You watched with terror.

Foam rose up the boy's mouth, his shrieks pierced your eardrums. The fluid dripped down his jaw, marring his clothes. He clutched the area where you stabbed him. Scratching at it with all his might. The sound of flesh ripping filled your ears as the boy ruthlessly, tore the muscles.

You were stunted. You couldn't speak or move. You weren't chained but you felt as if a thousand shackles bore you down.

The next seconds were a blur. The screams started to die down, his body losing it's color. Sooner than you could grasp, did the room turn silent again.

The boy was dead.

.

"Enjoyed the show, wife?"

You slapped your hand over your mouth, stumbling a few steps back. You couldn't tear your eyes off the young boy, bile rose up your throat as the room started to spin.

"Wh-what did you-"

No- you couldn't throw up, whatever second thought it was, it refrained you from crumbling to your knees and make a mess. Shivers went down your spine, you struggled to stand straight. The stench of the corpse and the expunging liquids started to fill your nostrils. You were almost on the verge to lose consciousness.

"What... did you do?"

Your eyes flickered to Sukuna. He stood tall, not a sign of emotion on his mien. You regret ever considering mirth to the worst feature on him, cause none was more terrifying.

And he was watching you.

It reminded you of the time, you first saw him -  covered with blood of the lives he had taken, down the river bank. Victim of naivety and ignorance, you didn't know any better than to not let him see you. Wandering towards the peculiar beast, even when a gut wrenching terror asked you to run; you were stubborn. You had asked - are you alright?

"What did you do?" You repeated again.

Tilting his head, he kept his unwavering gaze fixed on you. "As a matter of fact, I didn't do anything, wife." He paused, letting the horror shadow your features, "It was all you."

You needed to run.

The kanzashi– which was till then clasped in your hand firmly– fell down. A clank, you heard.

One step.

One step towards the door. He is standing afore you, the fingers of his upper right arm ran through your open hair, tangling in the roots, he yanked your head back.

"I don't remember, giving you the permission to leave."

Tears prickled your eyes as you tried to break free. Sukuna was having none of it. He dragged you by your hair towards the corpse of the boy. Your nails jabbed into his wrist while whimpers of anguish left your mouth.

Sukuna shoved you down to your knees, tugging your hair back - you were sure, they will be ripped off if he yanked with any more pressure - he made you glance at its face. He crouched beside you. With a flick of his finger, he ripped the blindfold out of the boy.

"Dare to shut your eyes."

Compliance had become second nature.

The body was rigid, skin turning blue. The veins on his arms were bulged out, his mouth wide open, filled with foam, trickling down his cheek, drying on it.

The sight caused you to gag.

Horrifying. His bloodshot eyes were wide open, protruding out of the sockets. Irises dilated in shape, which you considered humanly impossible. But what had your heart hammering in your chest wasn't the vivid details you saw on the corpse. It was the fact, that you recognized the boy. Son of that distant elder cousin, you'd seen once or twice in a year.

"Look at that, love." Sukuna cooed in your ear, forcing you to face the corpse.

You shook your head violently, nails dug into his wrist - desperate to escape. Your heart thumped inside your ribcage, you could hear it in your ears, your guts twisted in numerous ways as sweatbeads trailed down your forehead.

"You did that."

No. No, you didn't. You didn't do it. It wasn't you.

"You killed him."

No, you didn't... he didn't die because of you.

"Take a good look. See what you've done."

You vigorously shook your head. Denying all of his claims cause... cause they were... false, yes, false. They were false.

"No," You stated once you found your voice. "N-no, no... I- no."

Sukuna hummed, twisting a knot in your hair, "Yes, you. You did it."

No. You were innocent. You weren't to be blamed. It wasn't you.

It was... him.

"No, no, I didn't," You refused again, standing your ground. Moving your eyes towards him, you gritted your teeth. "No, I didn't do it. I didn't do anything. It was you."

"Really? How so?"

Fire burnt in your eyes. It was enough. He couldn't make you believe which you didn't commit - you didn't kill him.

"Poison," You said with conviction lacing your tone. "He was poisoned, a stab wouldn't procure such a reaction."

"Observant as ever," He mused, quirking up an eyebrow. A faint smile curled up on his lips. "Still, it doesn't gratify the fact that you were the one to end his life."

Blood boiled inside you, surging through your veins like lava. He had no right to accuse you of something. You didn't kill him, he couldn't make you believe it, whatsoever may happen.

"I may have stabbed him with the kanzashi, but that didn't have any trace of poison in it. I am-"

"Sure of it?"

You could only glare at him. He was toying with you. Tugging the strings of your conscience but you won't have any of it. "I am," You confirmed, staring at him without any falters. "I held it... you held it. If it was really drenched with toxicant as lethal as that, we- we both would be dead."

His grip loosened from your hair, hand falling down. The corners of his eyes crinkled, the smile turning into a smirk.

"It was you," You continued. "You did something to him at first and-"

Sukuna broke into a chortle of laughter. Far from jovial, more so sinister, filled with sheer malevolence. He gripped your jaw, pulling you closer to himself. His sharp canines glinted in the dim light.

"You just keep on fascinating me, wife."

Each second with him was revolting. Just his touch alone had your skin crawling. Yet, you couldn't let him know he has the upper hand.

"We had a pact," You stated firmly. His game was disgusting. What was he trying to do? What was his goal? "If I stay with you, you wouldn't lay a finger on my family, then- h-how could-"

"I would still stand on the ground, that I didn't do anything." He replied, a hint of amusement in his tone. "It was all you, wife. I can assure you that I didn't go back in my words." His canines glinted while he smiled. "Not a flick of pain. Save for..." He paused, his eyes widening, the carmine irises glowed in the dark. "Save for telling him, he'd be killed by a snake bite."

"There was no venom on my pin."

"Know so," He confirmed, a playful smirk on his visage. You wished you could read minds, if possible only of him, that'd been enough. Then where did poison come from? You wanted to question but he beat you to it.

"His fear turned into poison."

You blinked. Once. Twice. You knew he had an urge to play mind games but this was ridiculous. You questioned, shell-shocked, "What?"

"He let his fear get the better of him, assuming your pin to be a snake. He believed it." He explained while you listened without so much as a word. "His conscience caused his body to give out the exact reactions, he imagined. A shock, you might say. That caused his death."

His game was disgusting. If he thought, he could just give you any excuse as this and let you believe his accusations then he was mad wrong. You gritted your teeth, yanking your face away from his grip. For a second, you saw all of his eyes opening wide with surprise. But that didn't extinguish the fire burning in you.

He reached out, dragging you towards him via the arm. A glare resting on his face. "What did I tell about refusi-"

"I don't believe you," You cut him off, hands clenched into fists. It was the first time in a long time, you lost your composure in front of him. No, you wouldn't play as his doll anymore. He broke his promise, its only fair that you do so. "I don't believe a single word you say. You- you did something, you must have. Fear, belief, whatever the fuck, something as trivial as that-"

"So you think fear is trivial, wife?" He sighed, his clutch in your arm remained firm. The rough callouses of his palm, rubbed over your skin. "And here I thought, you might be different than the rest. But you managed to drop below my expectations."

"Maybe that's what I love about you, darling." He continued.

Disgust arose in you yet again. Love. As if he had any of that. He wasn't capable of love. Not in this lifetime. Never. 

He spoke again, "Times you are the smartest I have seen, then you speak such blasphemy which would even embarrass the Gods you worship. Your silence was awarded by him leaning near your ear. He twisted a curl of your hair between his fingers. "Fear, wife..." He whispered to you. "Fear is a mind killer. It makes you believe anything. The small drop of poison which contaminates all the water."

"In the end, belief and fear are sides of the same coin," His top two eyes, flickered to the corpse of the boy. "I made him consume the poison of fear and you-" He turned to you again. "You made him believe it... so, in a way, yes. Yes, I did do something. Save for the part of ending his life. Though I didn't break my part of our pact." A smirk tugged on his lips. "You were the one who killed him. Isn't that great?"

Your breath hitched, throat gone dry. You gazed at him, eyes wide open. Your mind was a blank canvas.

Fear, poison, belief, killing...

He made you kill someone. An innocent boy who didn't even do anything.

Why won't he much rather just end your life?

Sukuna pulled away from you, standing up, he walked over to the lantern placed in the room. The stench of the rotting corpse had long ago started to pool in.

"You made me kill him." You whispered, still knelt, staring at the floor. When greeted with silence, you questioned again, a tone higher, "You made me kill him."

"And?"

His nonchalance had always been infuriating to you.

You could feel him standing a few steps behind you. "If you really wanted to kill my kin, you should've just told me. Getting your herbs was a tiring chore." You didn't miss the emphasis he put on, herbs. The roll of his eyes while speaking floated before your eyes even though you couldn't see him; the expression must had turned to a smirk later. "However, the taste of taking a life– isn't it delicious, wife?"

Guilt gnawed at you, tearing you internally. Your shoulders trembled as you let out ragged breaths, eyes fixed on the bloodied arm of the boy. The same arm where the kanzashi pierced, the muscles torn apart, blood drying on it due to the boy's onslaught. Nausea overrode your senses, bile rose up your throat and the next moment you were throwing up. The wastes ran down your mouth, your nails dug into the wooded boards – bruising your fingertips and chipping the nails. You didn't realize Sukuna stepping up to your side, pulling your hair back while you were caught into the ordeal.

A disapproving grunt left his mouth after you were finished, yanking you up with your wrist. He pulled you towards the door. "Com-"

"No." Your heels remained firm on the ground. You refused him before you could even think. He turned towards you slightly, a scowl resting on his features before he pivoted around. He cast a glare upon you but before he could speak, your mouth opened again.

"You're even lower than scum." Your jaw ticked, hands clenching into fists. "You made me kill an innocent boy. Someone who might have done nothing to you, You– You disgust me, Sukuna."

Done you were with the respect, he demanded. If that angered him, made him want to rip out your heart and watch the life drain from your eyes. He was most welcome.

But it looks like, he wasn't resorting to any of that.

"You made me a murderer." You urged, staying strong in your stance. "You turned me into you."

His eyebrow twitched, a wave of mirth washed over him. "You were always like me, wife."

"I am nothing-"

"You are. You are like me. You are no saint, as you think so of yourself. " He said, leaving no room for argument. His lips pressed tight into a thin line. 

Yet, you refused to believe that. You were nothing like him. Couldn't even dream so. You were not him.

"You kill children in your womb, I kill them after they're born. How is it so different?"

"It is different." You yelled, your jaw clenched, teeth baring out. "This world needs no more of your lineage, it needs no more of you." You jabbed your pointer finger on his chest, tears pooling into your eyes. You refused to shed them. "You kill for your own sake, I do not."

"Then who do you kill for?"

"For everyone." The faint snort of his reached your ears. You couldn't decipher what he found so delightful in this.

"Playing God, are we?" He mocked causing your vexation to rise.

"Maybe I am. For the least, I am not killing innocent people like you."

From where such defiance arose, you weren't sure of. Perhaps, all the frustration, fright, terror which accumulated till now had reached its limit. Moreover, Sukuna's provocation must be the fuel to the fire.

You might be left bleeding– No, you would be left bleeding. You welcomed it with open arms.

.

"Careful," Sukuna pushed a strand of your hair behind your ear. "All Gods aren't worshipped."

He was enjoying himself. In all honesty, your obedience was getting too monotonous. This was better. Your defiance was amusing. Arousing, if there's to add. If he knew, letting you end a few lives would have this effect then he would have resorted to this long ago.

"Better than you." You shoved his hand away, "You are nothing more than a wretched, two-faced curse destroying all of our lives."

He noted your scowl, the way your lips were shut tight, your eyebrows crinkled together. Reasons evident, all he desired was to pull you into his arms smash his lips against yours. Taste the very essence of your being. Consume you wholly, just the way you are. So that in the end, your name, your taste, your scent would be engraved in his very soul. Without your mention, he wouldn't be complete. 

But he refrained from giving in now. His desire extended to a far more sinister route. "I wonder..."

What would it be like to break your conviction? What would it be like to break you?

Oh, he knew.

Would it be right moment to let you know? Maybe he should wait for another, more appropriate time.

Hmm, perhaps he should. But no.

He let you play these games for too long. Tired of this game plan, he was. Maybe, you would just come to your senses if he let you know. So he let the words, flow out:

"I wonder, why this curse keeps protecting your pathetic life from people who would cross rivers to lay siege to your life?"

Worth everything.

Sukuna watched as your face lost its color. The previous boldness you presented him with was replaced by a mask of confusion and. Such a pretty sight, it was. To see you, falter from your stand. Second guess, yourself, be in denial then rage consumes you. And you look at him, like he was the forbearer of your misery. (He is).

Oh, how good he has you memorized.

Even the littlest of reactions you contort on your mien, on your mannerisms; everything has him intrigued. You have him intoxicated.

"You know the ones, the people... your people, for whom you play this God."

Sukuna wished he could capture this moment. He'd have the chance to take a glimpse of it again, whenever he wished to. The horrified look on your face as the weight of his words started to sink in.

Would you still look like this if he tells you the terror he bestowed on them who tried to steal you away from him? What would you say if he vividly describes each imagery of how he slowly, agonizingly burnt them, severed them and tormented them? Leaving them nothing but fragments beyond recognition.

You were his. All of you belonged to him. Without his sanction, no one could even see you, let alone touch you. Ah- just how many sorcerers perished from his hands, the number of villages, bathed in blood; save for yours. (Courtesy to that stupid pact, he forged with you)

Something had told him, that there'd be a better time to put an end to the pitiful lives of your kin.

"Can't speak? What caused so, darling?" His tone was laced with smugness, a twisted joy elicited in him. "Fearful that your play amounted to nothing?"

Your jaw ticked with anger. You were furious. "I don't believe you. You are lying."

Your trust on humans was commendable, he'd give you that. However, there's stark contrast between faith and blind belief. You were inclining towards the latter.

So, what do they do when words fail to convey message? Oh right, you give them a prime example.

"Let me just show it to you then, wife."

It was a gamble, he was willing to make. To keep you with him, forever, as he wanted - he needed you to know that no place other than his arms would be as comforting. Even if that meant breaking your very soul, so be it.

.

You were home.

One moment, Sukuna held your gaze. The next, you are standing before your hearth.

Toes dipping into the familiar black soil, the land where you ran and played during your childhood. Your familial home stood steps away from you. Still looked the same except the visible cracks on the wall, a layer of dust on top of the door and the woods looked worn out. However, what caught your eyes weren't the flaws of your home but the familiar older woman walking into your home.

"Mother…"

She stilled all of a sudden, rotating on her heels, her eyes landed on you. Shell shocked, that's what she was with the widened eyes and parted lips. A small smile curved up on your lips, she still looked the same except the few grey hairs and wrinkles aside her eyes.

"Mother," You called again, taking a step towards her. "I am back."

Sooner than you expected, her eyebrows scrunched up, mouth curving down when she finally registered your presence. You weren't some illusion or her mind playing tricks. "What are you here for?"

The disdainful tone caused you to flinch. You didn't expect this. Returning home, you dreamt of it to be filled with tears of joy and warm embraces. Not this… whatever, she was presenting you with. But- But its fine, you have returned after a two whole years. She must have been worried. The reason of her apprehension. God, you had a lot making up to do.

"Well, you know," You chuckled lightly, scratching the back of your neck. "Back… just back. I have returned."

"Found your way after two years?" She crossed her arms over her chest, staring at you with a look you didn't want to recognize.

You nodded, "Yes. How could I forget my way? Our address, its-"

You were interrupted when your name was spit out from her mouth. Her glare on you was palpable, "I know what it is. What are you here for?"

Her fury even made your skin crawl with fear. You were often on the receiving end of her glare when you were a child, given by your tendencies to run around and cause trouble for others. Yet, those glares, were none like this. This- this- you didn't want to name what it was.

"You are angry," You don't know if its directed towards your mother or yourself as you hold onto the last bit of fragments that not all is lost. "I get it, I really do." You stood on your toes, attempting to look behind her, into your house. "Where's father? Tell him, I am-"

"No more."

As if the air was knocked out of your lungs.

"What?" Your neck craned towards her so fast, it might have left a sprain. Yet, that was the least of your concern. "What do you mean by no more?"

"No more means no more." Your mother's sigh fell heavy on the air, words carried the weight of the world. Laid with pain underneath.

"How- when? Wha-what happened?" You couldn't wrap your mind around the new discovery. No one told you such. Who could've guessed? Such an ordeal to occur in your absence. And what might she be going through, without you. You didn't even get the chance to talk to him, one last time.

"A year ago," She confessed, her voice conveyed her lament and sorrow. Her words felt like a hammered blow on the fragile façade of hope, you had intricately crafted for yourself. However, she wasn't done. Her eyes held scorn, lips curled up to a sneer. "Aren't you satisfied? You finally made your mark. Must tell you," Her voice, once filled with love held nothing save for contempt, directed at you. "Good game, you played, dear." She spit the endearment as if, it were poison.

"No, I- I never wanted any of this. What are you even talking about?" A trembling footfall towards her, you whispered, "M-mother-"

"Don't you dare call me that."

The weight of her judgement felt heavy on you, pressing down, suffocating you alike chains.

"You are no daughter of mine."

You weren't aware since when the tears had sprang up your eyes, breaking the barricades, they shed down. Your throat burnt as you struggled to even breathe, clutching your chest - a searing pain shooting in your heart. Your heart was shattering from the ultimate rejection from your own flesh and blood.

"While you're at it, know this." Your mother continued.

The next words were like a blow to the gut, each syllable lined with the weight of revelations. Ones that hung in the air like a funeral shroud.

"In his last moments, his only regret was bringing a daughter like you in this world."

.

This night just doesn't seem to end, does it?

You were left as a hollow shell. Tethering the steps away from the home you were no more welcomed. Exhaustion reigned heavy on you. Physically and mentally.

Where were you going? You didn't know. Just where your feet would take you, there would you go. Perhaps, you can return to Sukuna. Would he take you back? Most probably not. Considering, your earlier outburst, adding to the fact that you refused to give him what you want; he might just discard you as you proved to be useless.

Funny. It was so damn funny. Once, you wished to escape from his hands whatsoever the price yet now… now you considered returning to him.

You could hear him calling you pathetic. Disgusting. More disgusting, that you agreed with him.

You were truly pathetic.

But before you could spiral down the void of self-hatred, a voice- nah, multiple voices startled you.

"There she is, parading around some meek, innocent girl." A scoff is added. "You are far from it."

"The nerve of you to just walk back into our lives after you betrayed us."

Your neck cranes to your left, an old man - the village elder with a few other men and women following behind; they approached you. "Excuse me?"

"Who do you think you are?" A woman's cry reached your ears. "Returning after you turned your back on us."

You flinched at the accusation thrown. What could be possibly be instigating? To all your knowledge, you were walking in this- in your village after two long years. Anger, disdain and accusatory glares clouded their features. If your mother's insults weren't enough to pierce through your heart then it certainly did now, with all the people, you once called your own to look at you like you were the monster.

You summoned the least bit of courage you had, squared your shoulders and started, "I'd have you know-"

"Traitors don't get to speak." At the center of the crowd was the village elder. He was the pillars of your hamlet, revered for his wisdom and guidance, but now he looked akin a judge ready to deliver his sentence upon you. A sentence which would push you more into this conundrum. "You've been cavorting to that monster. Disgusting."

"I am no traitor." You retorted soon. "You can't accuse me of such when you don't ev-"

"Save it for someone who would care, whore."

The curse had your mouth parted in disbelief, horror etched upon your mien. Sooner than you could compose yourself, did whispers of agreement rippled through the crowd which branded you as a traitor.

"You are just as twisted as him."

"Get out of here if you so much as hold your life dear."

"Don't play as the innocent bitch, now."

The accusation hung in the air like a dark cloud, poisoning the atmosphere with its venomous hatred. Your breath was caught in your throat as you searched desperately for words to defend yourself; the crowd's hostility rendered you speechless. But amidst the cacophony of condemnation, one voice stood out above the rest.

I wonder, why this curse keeps protecting your pathetic life from people who would cross rivers to lay down yours?

Really? Were you really recalling his words now? Now of all times… You truly were pathetic.

For one moment, You just stayed silent - letting their accusations bore you down. Somewhere you wished all of it were just a nightmare. You'll soon wake up on your bed beside Sukun- fuck! Since when did you start to expect to wake up with him? He- He was toying with your mind. This was the only result. But the fact that this was your thought process had you recoil back.

The next moment, everything made sense.

These accusations were stemmed from the fact that you- you were proclaimed to be the wife of the King of curses. Your unwillingness to return, given for the pact you forged with Sukuna, was taken as your cue that you betrayed your family, your home, your people.

Your family despised you. Your people despised you. The very same people you chose to protect were turning their back on you.

Did they truly try to lay down your life?

Amidst your plight, you didn't register when the village elder marched up to you. "Didn't you hea-" His trial at speech was cut off. Nay, his lifeline was cut off. (Humorous, isn't it?)

Numerous red lines appeared on his body before it burst off into a globs of flesh and blood. Blood which splashed onto you, marring your visage and attire with its hues.

He was here. You knew it. You could feel it.

For some reason, it filled you with a sense of relief.

However, your people were on the other end of the rope. The eyes which afore held hatred and disgust, they were now filled with horror and fright. In this reverie as the villagers started to flee, a torch tumbled on the ground - lighting the grass on fire. The winds showed no mercy, as the howls increased, so did the flames.

Provoking him was never the right move.

You were digging your own grave.

So you shouldn't have been surprised that your wish would be granted. Yet, if you could have one wish then you'd wish for freedom but no- freedom was a forfeited dream, far beyond your reach. Consideration of that one would never be fruitful. You are trapped even in your dreams.

Playing with fire only gets you burnt.

For long, you played this game and this- this was your compensation. For everything you had done until now, all you are returned with was abandonment. Not that supposedly, betrayal, yes. More appropriate.

Flames surrounded you, crawling up your skin, the screams piercing your ears, your chest heaved up and down. Gaze, once settled on your hearth, now all you saw were the burning huts, the crackling of embers reached your ears. Attire and hands stained with blood of the insolent.

No one touches what's mine.

The warning shouldn't have been taken lightly. Should have known, the extent of his power.

Eyes held terror, fright, regret- whatever you could name. The multitude of names you received seemed no more than a distant dream, nowhere to be found. All were running away - expectable.

You expected calamity, but you were calm.

The sparks danced over your irises as everything went down in the crimson hues. Save for you, you weren't burning. Not an spark touched your skin. Was it the distance or the control? Who knows. But one confirmation which you held was that - tonight you won't die. Not so soon either.

Careful, not all Gods are worshipped.

The words rang in your ears and as if on cue, you found him again. In this trance of insanity, only one thing held your sight when you attempted to turn - The eyes tinted with crimson.

All of a sudden, something burnt inside you too.

Unbridled rage consumed you. Your chest heaved up and down as ragged breath left your mouth. Their words came back to you, ringing in your ears as if you were pushed into a void.

Who do you think you are? Returning after you turned your back on us.

Would this bitch even be alive if you prioritized yourself?

Don't play as the innocent bitch, now.

Is that the thanks you get for trying to protect them?

Traitors don't get to talk.

Traitor… fine, you'd be the traitor.

With caution you took one step towards him. No reaction. Your chance - you took another. Then another and another. You stood before him, with nothing save for a void etching your features. Amusement flickered over him, the corner of his lip curled up.

"Saw it for yourself wife?"

Seemed like silence was your go-to response lately. From your peripheral, you saw the burning houses, the distant screams reached you. For some reason, the screams were almost soothing. You revelled in this. Their gut wrenching shrieks were like a balm to your essence.

Their predicament was your solace.

Sounded like someone you knew. Someone who had warned you about them but you chose to remain ignorant. Sickening… were you becoming like him?

You were always like me, wife.

You could laugh. Maybe you were like him.

"Let's forge another pact?" You offered, keeping your eyes pinned on him.

"A pact?"

"A pact."

A smirk curved up his lips, the upper pair of arms crossed over his chest, "Humour me, love."

The smirk wasn't directly for you. But he did. So you returned it back. One with an equal malicious intent. Cause in that moment, no second thoughts, no doubts clouded your mind. And so, you uttered the blasphemy:

"You kill them all, each and everyone. In return, I will stay with you, give you an heir. Whatever you want from me."

.

A year later

Screams died down after a gruelling ten hours.

"Good news, Sukuna sama. It's a boy."

A/N: Honestly, I was almost done with this fic, long ago but while writing the climax, I kept chickening out with all the self-doubts but then I just wrote what I wanted. I do understand if the ending is not up to your liking and I sincerely apologize for it.

However, thanks for reading up till the end. I enjoyed writing this a lot. Some feedback is appreciated <3

[starmosaics]

Mars in the 8th house pt. 1/3

I'm splitting this into parts because there's a lot to cover with this placement.

A person with an 8th house Mars doesn't just share anything with anybody, they'll test you and make sure that you can be trusted before sharing anything about themselves other than surface-leveled things. From the outside, an 8H Mars person seems distant, kept, shut off, and mysterious; they're an enigma. Many people feel intimidated just by being in the 8H Mars person's presence. People want to desperately figure this person out or pinpoint something about them, but just simply can't. The reason 8H Mars people are so guarded is because they most likely have faced life-altering pain or traumatic experiences at some point in their lives, commonly due to death or betrayal by other people. They can be incredibly hesitant or totally reluctant with trusting and opening up to others. They tend to keep people at arms length and might have paranoid thoughts about getting close to people because of their trust issues and reluctance to let down their guard. They are incredibly hypervigilant people and it takes a long time for them to express their vulnerabilities.

These people are naturally investigative and are great at researching and absorbing information. They're like sponges when it comes to obtaining details that reveals the truth. They love digging things up beyond the surface, revealing the truth, and bringing things to light. They want to understand things on a much deeper, intellectual level to reveal secrets and to solve cryptic and hidden messages. They either are great sources themselves or provide great sources for others and will always show up with the cold hard facts. I worked with a girl who had an 8H Mars and she did so much research on employee's rights to dig up what illegal things our management was getting away with. She obsessed over it for months and was fixated on "exposing" the institution we worked for. I am also friends with a guy who does scientific research at his school as a job who has an 8H Mars. I have an 8H Mars and am deeply invested in astrology.

These people are wonderful friends, family members and partners, and will always be the first responder when someone they care about is in a dire situation. They're also the best person to be with when in a dangerous or life-threatening situation. These are the types of people to remain calm and collected to ensure that whatever is at hand is taken care of. During an emergency, they're the ones to brainstorm and come up with a plan to execute; they're incredible strategists. This is most likely due to having dealt with a lot of dangerous or traumatic events in their lives which caused them to be able to respond to other people's situations with a much more steadfast approach.

Most of the 8H Mars people I've met had a weird relationship with their sexuality in their teenage/young adult years and lost their virginity at a later age compared to their peers. People may objectify 8H Mars folks or perceive them to be more sexual than they are (ex. being told that the 8H Mars person looks like they have a lot of experience with sex even if they don't) because these people commonly ooze sex appeal. Something about them makes people feel incredibly drawn and magnetized to them. I knew someone with an 8H Mars who was a stripper and did sex work. She also had a sugar daddy which I would associate to be an 8H topic (shared/gained resources from another, Mars covering sex). I too have considered doing sex work for quite a while now. 8H mars people may like more rougher and primal sex such as BDSM. The bedroom is where the more darker parts of themselves are revealed. They may also enjoy exploring different kinds of kinks rather than having plain or vanilla sex. Despite people thinking 8H Mars folks are sexually progressive all the way, these people actually need to have an emotional/spiritual connection to those they engage sexually with, otherwise they will feel like something is missing during sex and that the void they're seeking to be filled cannot be reached. Unfortunately, I have also known many 8H Mars people who have faced a form of sexual victimization.

In the next 2 parts, we'll cover certain transformations these people may undergo in their lives, mental health and psychology, life and death situations, struggles within intimate relationships, and "taboo" topics these people might enjoy. If you have an 8H Mars let me know if this resonates :))

[anthurak]

So by this point, I think many of us are likely familiar with the idea that the breakup of Team RWBY at the end of Volume 3 is meant to thematically parallel the breakup of Team STRQ in the wake of Summer’s death, ie; Ruby falls into a coma for a few days while Summer disappears and then both their teams fracture. Along with a popular sub-theory that Blake leaving Yang after the Fall is meant to parallel Raven leaving Tai.

But the thing is, if Ruby falling into a coma at the end of Volume 3 is meant to parallel Summer’s (supposed) death and the way this loss caused the fracturing and breakup of their respective teams, then Raven’s actions DON’T really parallel Blake nearly as well as a lot of people think.

And in fact, I feel like Qrow could potentially have paralleled Blake’s actions FAR better.

Like people talk about how Raven ‘abandoned’ Tai just like Blake ran away from Yang after the Fall of Beacon. Except if the point of parallel to the Fall of Beacon is Summer’s death, then the parallel doesn’t work because Raven was ALREADY GONE from Team STRQ by the time Summer disappeared. To the point where Tai, Qrow and Ozpin had (and still have) NO IDEA she was even involved in whatever happened to Summer. Raven can’t exactly have abandoned Tai just like Blake did to Yang if Raven wasn’t even around.

Instead, as I’ve discussed in the past, I think Raven’s actions following Summer’s ‘death’ potentially line up far better with WEISS. Like if it turns out that losing Summer was what actually drove Raven to return to her tribe, then that lines up very nicely with Weiss being taken back to her family/Atlas in the wake of the Fall of Beacon: Both return to the shitty, abusive family that raised them. And given how much of Weiss’s character is tied up in her family and their ‘legacy’, then the way Raven eventually took over her tribe makes her an ideal foil; effectively representing a Weiss who did eventually take over the Schnee family and company, but in the process internalized all the pain and trauma her family gave her.

And as for a cherry on top; if Ruby falling into a coma after the Fall of Beacon is meant to parallel Summer’s supposed ‘death’, then what was one of the last things Ruby did at the Fall?

Run off on a special mission with Weiss, just like we now know Summer did with Raven.

Now going back to my point about how Raven was not even around to abandon Tai just like Blake did to Yang, you know who WAS presumably around when Summer ‘died’?

Yeah; Qrow.

Let’s consider what exactly Blake actually did following the Fall of Beacon beyond just a surface-level reading: Yes, she did go back to her family, similar to what Raven may have done, but given that the Belladonnas are NOT actually shitty and abusive, I maintain that Weiss is still the better parallel to Raven. Instead, let’s consider Blake’s whole arc across Volumes 4 and 5 relating to the White Fang: At first being depressed over loss and perceived failure before being inspired to start working for a better cause, in this case pushing back against and stopping Adam’s takeover of the White Fang.

So I have to wonder; what if this reflects what Qrow did with Ozpin and the conspiracy following Summer’s ‘death’? Maybe Qrow and his teammates had helped Ozpin in the past and knew what he was doing, but what if THIS was the point where Qrow became fully committed to Ozpin’s cause and joined the Ozluminati full-time? Perhaps seeing it as a way of ‘honoring’ Summer’s memory.

Instead of staying with the one teammate he had left (and possible partner) who was now in a massive depressive spiral AND had two kids to take care of.

It starts to make Qrow and Tai feel a lot like Blake and Yang, doesn’t it?

This is one of the big reasons why I think Qrow and Tai are the REAL foil to Bumbleby on Team STRQ. They effectively give us a look at a version of Blake and Yang whose relationship failed. Or rather, were never able to ‘take the next step’ and actually form their relationship.

Qrow is a Blake who fully internalized her self-loathing and belief that she didn’t deserve Yang or that Yang was better off without her and has simply been pining for Yang from afar.

Meanwhile Tai is a Yang who likewise fully internalized her fears of abandonment and fully resents Blake for leaving her or may not have ever even fully recognized her feelings for Blake in the first place.

Essentially, Qrow and Tai are the version of Blake and Yang who weren’t able to work through all the problems, issues and baggage which allowed them to actually start their relationship. Like a Blake who didn’t get that vital pep-talk from Sun at the end of Volume 4, or a Yang who likewise didn’t get that vital talk from Weiss in Volume 5.

Which in turn leads us to what I brought up earlier with Qrow joining up with the Ozluminati full-time, essentially representing a Blake who threw herself into reforming the White Fang instead of returning to Team RWBY and reconnecting with Yang. Meanwhile Tai simply throws himself into a deep depression, grief and ‘moping’, ironically all the things he would later accuse Yang of doing (at some point I’m going to do a post on just how much PROJECTING Tai has likely been doing…)

So now Qrow and Tai have this low-key toxic relationship where Qrow is more-or-less aware of Tai’s extremely dysfunctional parenting but has also been enabling it and a lot of Tai’s unhealthy coping mechanisms over the years because he’s been pining for Tai ever since their Beacon days and still is pining in a very depressed, self-loathing ‘I don’t deserve him/to be happy’ way and also doesn’t want to risk conflict with his former partner and also the only teammate he has left.

Thus Qrow keeps his distance and just goes along with Tai’s dysfunctions and/or lets Tai push him away. Which in turn just reinforces Tai’s abandonment issues.

And Ruby and Yang are still stuck with utterly dysfunctional parental figures.

Oh, and if you need more proof about the deliberate parallels between Blake and Qrow…

Then how about the whole damn song where they sing about how they’ve always felt terrible about themselves but now things are looking up for them.

[dreamwritersworld]

His daughter! (Sully family x Reader) Part 4!

reminder to PLEASE give feedback either in the comments or inbox :) ALSO you should really read my rant at the end of the story after the “!🎀!” It gives more details to the story that you may not have noticed :)

The pair continued their relationship as though nothing was said to Y/n about it. As a matter of fact Y/n wanted to put all the words her dad said in the back of her mind but she knew she’d have to tell Ao’nung…she just didn’t know how or who to ask for advice. That’s when Ronal came in.

Y/n walked into the Maui extremely nervous, she had been coming in weekly to learn more about their culture and healing methods from Ronal. However this time was different, Y/n couldn’t hold in the secret anymore. She felt sick to her stomach about it and it only wrecked her even more when Ronal kept bringing their relationship up…

“So..How are you and Ao’nung? Getting along quite well I see!”

“Yes! We have been..”

Y/n smiled slightly which immediately set off a ringer in Ronal’s mind. The smile that Ronal grew to know so well felt tired and fake. You can only assume it was a Mother’s instinct because Ronal could feel the stress and worry radiate off of the young child’s body, she knew something was wrong. In the beginning of Y/n’s arrival Ronal must admit she didn’t like the idea of the relationship but Y/n was quite easy to love. In many ways Ronal felt protective over Y/n and Lo’ak the longer they had stayed over or showed their love for her kids..she found it beautiful. So Ronal felt comfortable to simply ask whatever question she pleased…

“Something’s wrong. I can feel your stress, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing just..just tired.”

“mmh if I knew better I’d think you’re lying.”

Y/n didn’t know how to respond she stayed quiet and Ronal let her eat her guilt up. Ronal knew that if she let the silence remain eventually Y/n will confide with her.

“…I am.”

“What is it Y/n?”

“I must admit I have fallen to love your son beyond measure..but I’m so frustrated.”

“Oh I have known about that for the longest, but frustrated? Why?”

“Please keep this between us..but my father refutes the idea of us even being together. We got into an argument. We always do except this time he requested me to stop seeing him outside of our usual practices. I couldn’t handle it so I fought back, I fought back for at least some control, some aspect of my life.”

Ronal stood in silence as the girl struggled to push back through her cracked voice and heavy heart. It was easy to see that Y/n quite literally had it all without having anything to call hers. For the first time Ronal’s speculation had been confirmed, Y/n truly was trapped in a bubble of her fathers consciousness. To say that Ronal was upset was an understatement, she was infuriated. How could Jake not like her child? How could he ask- no demand Y/n to stop speaking to him? He should be grateful for all they’ve done for him, for them. regardless, Ronal knew not to think of it that way. Because at the end of the day her children found love that they so desperately deserved.

“I am sorry Y/n..I understand I won’t make a change to your heavy heart but I ask you to please not run away from something you deserve.”

“…of course not. I could never.”

“good.”

That’s how the conversation ended, they continued to practice and learn but the both of them had uneven tension in their hearts..once it ended Y/n quickly said her goodbyes and ran over to meet Ao’nung once again.

There the couple laid in a hidden cave they considered their own. Holding each others hand, touching and loving each other, secure in the knowledge that they would never let go. All Ao’nung could think about when he looked at Y/n and the way she perceived life and took all the beauty of it to channel through herself, was the way he loved her. He loved how silly she was, how contagious her laugh was, her love for the environment and Eywas creations. Nothing made him more shy than seeing her rush to do chores with her hair pinned up as she cleaned, in a complete rush to see him. He can’t even forget how much of a daredevil she could be, always willing to challenge him to try something new. He loved her dearly..

It was up until the moment he arrived home and overheard a conversation between his mother and father that for the first time he got mad at Y/n..

“Can you believe it? We give him and his family a home and he still decides to keep his daughter on a chain? He can’t even give us the decency of respect to allow his daughter to see my son!”

“Ronal please..we will figure this out soon but this should not worry you. Y/n is practically a women, she will do as she pleases-“

“Except she’s not! Not in their eyes, she’s not a grown woman yet. That means that Jake will continue to do whatever he pleases to keep himself content-“

“Just because he requested no relationship with Ao’nung doesn’t mean she’ll listen. They’re just kids. That Jake doesn’t understand that regardless of what he says Y/n no longer bothers to care!”

“You should’ve heard her Tonowari…she was so distraught. It sounded like her heart was being torn in two. I don’t know what she’ll do..but she hasn’t told Ao’nung. She seemed like she refused to tell him, to scared to hurt him-“

“Yes but that’s her decision. She will do as she pleases. I understand that’s her father and yes he is wrong but if she does listen to him, so be it. Ao’nung will get over it, he always does.”

“No Tonowari this is different. I can feel it. I just can’t allow her to drop him because of what he father demands.”

“Well we need to drop it. She’ll figure it out and soon enough we’ll know on their own accord. We should head to bed my love.”

That night Ao’nung went to bed extremely frustrated at Y/n for never confiding in him about the situation. It felt as though she was simply playing with his heart and testing to see how far she was able to go before she could break things off. So the next morning he didn’t even go looking for her instead waiting for her to come to him…

Ao’nung had been working on the shore with a couple of his friends not even rushing to get his chores done so he could see Y/n. That was until a familiar sweet voice came looking for him..

“Ao’nung! You’re not done? How come they gave you more to do than usual?”

“I don’t know we’ll talk later.”

Normally Y/n wouldn’t think about it much but the way Aonung’s tone was and the way he dismissed her did not sit well with Y/n.

“..ok.? Come meet me when your done then.”

“Yea sure whatever.”

Y/n looked at him with hurt and frustration in her eyes, she felt as though he didn’t care to speak with her or acknowledge her so she walked about without saying a thing. She felt embarrassed and ashamed to had even gone looking for him..as she walked away she heard even more issues to worry about

“Woah! Trouble in paradise?”

“Shut up! She’ll hear you-“

“Just saying! I mean you always rush out of here-“

“Just shut up I don’t want to hear it!”

Had Ao’nung found out what was discussed between her and his mother yesterday? Was he unforgiving to her now that he knows? Y/n didn’t find out the issue and instead had to go searching for him again. Yes, despite her pridefulness she wouldn’t ever dear to fall asleep mad at him.

“Ao’nung!”

There he was, walking home across the sandy beach without a care in the world or at least that’s what Y/n thought. He had stopped for a moment and that’s all Y/n needed for her to catch up to him and pull him to the side.

“Whats wrong?”

“Nothing. Absolutely nothing.”

“Ao’nung please stop it, I know something’s wrong. I just wish you would talk or open up to me a little more. You were off this entire day, you never go without speaking to me.”

“How about you Y/n?! You never even thought to tell me about your father!”

Y/n’s eyes widened in surprise at his raised voice but with complete understanding of why. However this wasn’t the way to go about it..at least not for her.

“I did want to tell you! I was going to tell you, I just didn’t know how.”

“Yea and you told my mother?!”

“Because she asked me! I couldn’t lie!”

“Well I wish you had!”

“I didn’t mean to-“

“But you did! You did Y/n! And you didn’t even care to tell me later on either!”

“Ao’nung im Sorry! Yes it bothered me but it doesn’t change anything!”

“What do you mean? Your father hates me-“

“He doesn’t-“

“But he does. He doesn’t want me to ever be with you so much that you argued over me.”

“We always argue-“

“That doesn’t change anything Y/n. He told you not to see me more than friends anymore and you allowed this to continue knowing I love you.”

They stared at each other in silence both with tears. Ao’nung was so upset that he couldn’t even bare to acknowledge what he had just confessed and Y/n was too bottled up in her own head about the situation at hand.

“Well that’s because I love you too! So what if he doesn’t want me to be with you? I don’t care! Ok? I don’t and if you don’t want to fight for that fine.”

“Fine.”

Ao’nung couldn’t admit it but it wasn’t fine…but the moment he saw Y/n stand up to walk away he ran as though she was taking his heart with her.

Y/n ran off to the deck calling for an ilu to take her completely out of sight and far away from Ao’nung. When it had just arrived Ao’nung caught her.

“Get off the ilu.”

“No.”

“Get off the ilu.”

“No. And I don’t appreciate being ordered.”

“Get off the ilu Y/n.”

“Why so you can argue with me?”

“Get off the damn ilu Y/n!”

“No, I am leaving. You can talk to me when you are calm but Ao’nung let this be said, you will not disrespect or raise your voice at me.”

“Y/n I have every right-“

“No! You said you were fine with us not speaking anymore so be it! I’m fine with it too!”

Ao’nung absolutely can see straight through the emotional white lie because Y/n voice had cracked and her eyes had watered once again.

“Y/n please. Stop.”

“No! I’m upset! I’m upset at you for not understanding! I didn’t try to lie or hold a secret in! I was going to tell you I just didn’t know how. It didn’t even matter-“

“Stop. It did matter because it made you upset.”

“Well then I’ll deal with it on my own-“

“No Y/n. That’s for us to fix, not for you to decide on your own.”

“Ao’nung please. My father would never allow me to be with you, not yet. Can we just agree to be a secret for a little bit longer please. You are all I have, you are all I get to enjoy to myself.”

“Y/n you should understand you are asking a lot.”

“I know but please. I just want this part of my life for myself..”

“Forever-“

“No! I want to be able to show you off proudly but not right now please. My father wouldn’t allow it. He just needs to see you more ok? In a better light.”

“Better light? Y/n please.”

“Im serious. If he got to see you more from my point of view he’d be fine, just promise not to get into any trouble with the boys and we should be ok.”

“Im am future leader of the clan Y/n I think im ok.”

“I know but we were once future leaders too so that role doesn’t hold much to him anymore. please Ao’nung don’t be upset and be patient with me.”

“Ok..I will be.”

“…promise?”

“promise.”

“ok! Now stop being so grumpy!”

That’s when Ao’nung was yanked into the ocean and the two shared a kiss once more eager to stay out a little bit longer before they went home…

For awhile Jake hadn’t said anything and everyone went by as normal that week except one night Y/n decided to pass on hanging out with Ao’nung declaring that she had felt too ill to go out and insisted he went out to have fun without her while she slept. So Ao’nung had took that chance.

As teens normally would however, Ao’nung had slipped his hands onto a fruit that navi adults would use to get a little tipsy..or fully drunk. In Ao’nungs case he got drunk, and he allowed his thoughts to cloud him as he sat with his friends.

*Ao’nung’s thoughts*

..he doesn’t think im good enough for her and she doesn’t either..how could I ever be a good leader when they doubt me..?..

Whatever he was thinking got him pulled out of it, he had trashed a Maui with his friends, knocked out and was found by Tonowari. Yes, they were teenagers and considered older but under Tonowari’s authority this behavior wasn’t allowed so he scolded him. In. Front. Of. Everyone….including Jake.

Jake had overheard it and rolled his eyes at the foolishness, how could his daughter be with someone just as childish as her. Y/n watched the disappointment in his face as he listened and he gave her a know it all face in return, practically telling her “I told you so”. y/n couldn’t stand it, she asked Ao’nung for one thing. All she asked was for him not to get into any trouble and to be patient but he couldn’t keep his promise..it had been hours till Y/n would be approached by Ao’nung..

To say she was upset was an understatement. She was beyond frustrated with him.

“Y/n cmon let’s go out.”

He had tugged on her arm in an effort to pull her his way but she didn’t budge.

“No. What do you want?”

Ao’nung absolutely didn’t like that response as a matter a fact he didn’t even like the tone or attitude in her voice.

“Ok..we’re not doing this. Sit down.”

“No im working on something for your mother. Leave me alone.”

“Sit down Y/n.”

“Sitting down is not happening! So what do you want?”

“You.”

“Goodbye future ‘Olo’eyktan’. Leave.”

Y/n knew this would push his buttons, but she wanted it to. It should’ve bothered him that he was supposed to have his act together by now and that it’s ok for him to get drunk but not act like a fool! He was the future leader after all, that’s all they’ve ever trained him for and he still can’t show up for himself.

“Oh come on!”

“You do not summon me!”

“You do not get to push me out!”

“I am done. Ao’nung your father threatened you this morning! I heard it! Everyone heard it! Including my father.”

“Y/n it means nothing-“

“Nothing? You call him threatening to take your leadership nothing? Ao’nung I understand it may have seemed harmless in the moment but that is not how you act as future leader.”

“Oh so now you’re trying to control me?”

“Control? Of course not. I’m trying to help you and hold you accountable just as you would to me-“

“Well I wouldn’t! I wouldn’t if I knew it bothered you and you had enough on your plate.”

“Ao’nung please, you and I both know you would push for me to do better. And That’s all I’m doing for you.”

The couples hushed whispers got slightly louder as the conversation continued..

“Well that’s not what it feels like Y/n.”

“Ao’nung, im asking you to get better for yourself-“

“Is it that or is it the fact that you want your father to love me dearly the way you want him to, NEED him to-“

“Shh no-“

“Don’t shush me-“

“I can and I will. You’re being mean, stop it.”

Ao’nung sighed and reached out to hold onto Y/n’s waist in front of him,understanding that she still wasnt at her highest level of frustration with him.

“Ao’nung understand when I say I need you to do what you need to do to be good, to be great, to love what you do. I want that for you. You do what you need to do so I can do what I need to do.”

“You don’t think that this isn’t harder on me than it is you? You don’t think that I don’t want to dedicate myself to being the future leader? You don’t think that I want to be honorable enough to be the man that is going to be controlling this clan that might I add WILL protect you? I love you. I’m in love with you.”

Y/n fought every being in her body to give into Ao’nung right then and there instead she simply held the hand he laid on her waist and acknowledged his feelings with a small..

“..i love you too. I know that you’re trying but what you did today was not ok.”

“I understand and I’m sorry. I’m sorry that your dad had to see it.”

“My dad is not the issue-“

“Y/n, I know he was part of it. I know he probably gave you a look that got you so upset because he told you so.”

“…”

“Exactly.”

“Fine, I was slightly frustrated at that-“

“Told you so!”

“Ao’nunggggg stop it!”

The two laughed at the moment and stood in silence as Y/n continued to do the work she was instructed to do..everything was peaceful..

!🎀!

hey guyssss I really wanted to emphasize on drama and emotion this chapter . Reminder that these are two teens who are trying to navigate how to even go about being together because there are so many issues in the way with Ao’nung training, Y/n adapting and their parents.

I wanted to add in more arguments to make it slightly more realistic THEY ARE YOUNG TEENS ALMOSTTT YOUNG ADULTS so they obviously can’t be perfect 🙏 btw do you guys notice how much Ao’nung knows Y/n! He knew that she wasn’t only upset about him getting in trouble but more so upset that Jake had to see. He understood her different levels of frustration and he touched her knowing that she’d still melt to it because she wasn’t totally upset at him just disappointed. He also isn’t one to turn away from confrontation, he does well at communication with Y/n and he knows exactly how to get her to come to him and open up! 💕

Tag list: @ruyaas-world @neteyamyanw3

@elegantkidfansoul @adaydreamaway08 @luxiniary

@venomsvl @ratchetprime211 @mushy-mushroom04

@alohastitch0626 @sillysillygyal

[divinefeminine-card]

What requires your immediate attention right now?

Today, in this general reading we shall know what requires your immediate attention right now. Please, take what resonates. Choose the card or cards which appeals to you the most or jumps out to you the most, or any other method if you do one.

Please like and reblog if this pac resonated with you in any way!

Good Luck 🤞🏻🍀

Pile goes from left to right.

1-2

3-4

5-6

Pile 1

Hello Pile 1!

Let's get into your reading~

Cards: The Lovers, 10 of Cups, 10 of Pentacles.

I believe your immediate attention is required by your personal life. Your relationships. I am not even saying any specific one. It's for all. Your romantic relationship, your friendships and your family relations and every relationship which you adore. This needs your immediate attention. Maybe you have been ignoring this due to workload, stress, anxiety and what not. Please try to refocus on your personal life. You will get some clarity for good. And some much needed rest from all the chaos. Your people are there for you pile 1. No matter the actual relation, your people are your family. There are two 10s, so I believe your personal life sort of completes you~ (whatever you perceive it to be 💕)

All the very best 👍🏻

Pile 2

Now onto my pile 2!

~~

Cards: 9 of Pentacles, 5 of Pentacles, 10 of Wands, King of Pentacles.

My pile 2, the energy I got from you guys was a scattered one, a stuck one. I feel like, you guys are badly out of touch with yourself. You might need to seriously reconnect with yourself. Even with nature. Do you like animals? Perhaps. You might get significant joy from being in blissful solitude with yourself. Take some time out. Go somewhere, anywhere, even a simple walk will help you. I am getting this again. Do you guys have pets? If yes go with them. Pet, animal energy is very strong with this pile. I believe your spirit guides are looking out for you. Trust in them and have trust in yourself love! You are good, you are gonna do good.

Have faith in yourself 💕

Pile 3

Hello my lovely pile 3~~

Cards: 2 of Pentacles, Page of Wands, 9 of Pentacles

What I am getting is, your immediate attention is required by your work life I believe. You might have several tasks at hand. You might be juggling between them so much so that there is a great disbalance in your life because of that. Your mind is so occupied with all the work you have in your hands that you might not be even giving as much as you want to, to your work and even life circumstantially. The thing you need to do is, clear out your mind. Try to organise anything you can. Take small steps and start from there. Then, maybe the daunting and never ending may not be so horrifying. Balancing is the key here. Take only how much you can do. Might have to say no to a few offers.

You can do it pile 3! 💕

Pile 4

Hello my pile 4 🤗

Cards: 8 of Pentacles, 8 of Wands, 7 of Cups, Death ♾️ Rebirth.

This pile is giving me high school, college, any educational or vocational institutions vibe, AND anyone in a transition phase of their life regarding their career.

So as I said, your immediate attention is required by your studies, decisions and skills. For most of you I sense, you all are working hard and burning the midnight oil lamp. And I am so proud of you for that. I also, sense you might have many options on which way to go. It's just all too confusing. I connect with you deeply on this. What I suggest is, you can and will be awesome at whatever you are passionate about. Like listen, if you like something you are willing to work damn hard for it, you know passion ignites the flames so high and beyond in you all!! This transition phase will prove crucial to you. Think and think thoroughly, calmly.

Wishing for the best 🤞🏻

Pile 5

Hello my pile 5 :D

Cards: 6 of Cups, Ace of Cups, Ace of Swords, 8 of Swords.

My pile 5, you guys might be feeling, very much out of control I think. Might as well be feeling very very much suffocated with everything going around you. You know when the present comes to bite you, sometimes retreating back to older times, to where your heart lies is the best deal you can do/choose. And that's what you need to do. People from past, from whom you haven't talked to in months, years. Seeing photo albums, physical, online. Reminiscing about the past and thinking about the good times might be what you just need to do. Go deep in your mind and unlock the golden memories, who knows you might be in more in tune and control than you think.

Your heart is supposed to be in tune with you ❤️

Pile 6

Hello my lovely pile 6~~

Cards: 7 of Pentacles, Page of Swords, 3 of Wands, 8 of Swords.

My pile 6, have you been getting distracted from your path? I understand, it can get difficult and lonely while carving your path with patience meticulously. But, no one knows better than you on how much this all means to you. No one knows better than you on how hard you have worked for this, and how far you have come with so much resilience. I saw 11:11 right now, this might be the confirmation. Your brain, mind and intelligence will take you far and wide. Have trust in them and in yourself. You are a warrior. Like really, I am getting the vibes. The one who knows all the tactics and looks at the obstacles with eyes of determination. This is what you are. Keep working and going ahead, rest once in a while. You will do good, you will get better. Nothing can stop you now.

I believe in you ❤️

Thank you everyone who saw and participated in this pac reading! Mind you, this was my first pac. Please, any kind of feedback is always very very appreciated!! Whatever resonated, didn't resonate or anything you might want to say with this. My ask box is open.

[yoonavii]

Dating the Blind Girl

Context: sanji dating a girl who’s blind

Sanji's interest in you goes beyond physical appearance. He's drawn to your intelligence, wit, and the way you perceive the world through your other senses.

Your initial interactions are characterized by engaging conversations, where he’s genuinely captivated by your insights and perspective on life.

Sanji discovers that beauty isn't confined to physical appearance. He's fascinated by the strength and resilience you exhibit in navigating a world without sight. Your confidence and ability to overcome challenges captivate him.

He finds common ground with you through your shared love for cooking. He realizes that while he often emphasizes the visual presentation of dishes, you focus on flavors, aromas, and textures, enriching his culinary knowledge.

Sanji becomes attuned to your preferences and adapts his gestures to make you feel comfortable. He describes the dishes he prepares in vivid detail, painting a picture with words that you can savor.

You both explore new activities together, finding joy in experiences that engage your other senses. You may take walks on the beach, listening to the waves, or attend live performances, appreciating the music and atmosphere.

Sanji is incredibly patient and understanding, providing unwavering support as you share your experiences and challenges. He listens attentively, offering reassurance and encouragement whenever you face difficulties.

Sanji learns to communicate through touch, holding hands or guiding you with gentle gestures. He's considerate of your personal space and boundaries, making sure you feel comfortable in your interactions.

He occasionally surprises you with unique experiences. He might cook a meal with diverse textures and flavors or take you on a sensory adventure like feeling different fabrics or smelling exotic flowers.

As your relationship deepens, Sanji's admiration for you evolves into a profound love. He realizes that you enrich his life in ways he never imagined, and he's grateful to have you by his side.

Sanji's natural compassion and empathy shine through as he navigates your relationship. He learns from your perspective, gaining a deeper understanding of the challenges you face and the unique joys you find.

Despite any hurdles, Sanji's love for you remains steadfast. He values you for who you are and cherishes the unique bond you share, built on mutual respect, understanding, and love.

©𝐘𝐎𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐕𝐈𝐈— Any sign/evidence of plagiarism made from outside this name will be dealt with by whatever means necessary. Legal action may occur if non fanfiction works are plagiarized.

[trincketbox]

Jason Todd as a Trans (ftm) allegory

Written by me, a trans man

[this edit was made by me, original picture it's Dan Mora's sketch]

TW gender disphoria, (implied) transphobia.

Im not saying his story was written with this perspective in mind, Im saying *death of the author (*the reinterpretation of artistic creations by the public both as a community and aa individuals, and how this goes far beyond the creator's original message on mind) is a very real thing.

This narrative resonated with me, a trans man, and my experience as such. Maybe out there is another transmasc person who caught themselves invested in this character the same way as I, and maybe they'll read this post and be happy to found out they're not alone on these feelings.

Without further addue, let's begin.

The second Robin, and the feeling of not fitting

Every trans person first memory of perceiving oneself as somehow different (and how) it's particular to each.

Some realize pretty young, some older. Some always have this lingering feeling of not belonging but become conscious of it later in life.

This feeling its present trough all of Jason's life. First, when he first arrives at the Manor. Later, when he starts operating as Robin. Then when Tim "replaces him", and so on.

Usually labelled as the black lamb of the family.

Tragedy is always, first, born off love

Jason's death and resurrection is written as a tragedy (no shit, Sherlock). But there, to be a tragedy, there has to be hope first. There has to be love.

Now, this varies from version to version, but a general consence is that Jason Todd was loved by Bruce Wayne, regardless of how much their relationship might change and twist on the future; Jason Todd was a good kid, regardless of how he might be portrayed as recless. He was a traumatized, angry kid who wanted to make things better. Who wished for bad guys to not hurt people anymore. Who wished to change the system for better, and took the matter on his own hands both as a child and as a young adult.

This

This right here

Was a loved, brave, bold, sensitive, mischievous, smart child who would latter come back like this:

Demanding justice, demanding damnation for al the pain he went through, demanding retaliation to the monster that set him off this world.

And all these requests fell to the ears of Bruce Wayne, Batman. The man who took him in as a scared, bold litte child that beated him in the cold of the night in the alley where his parents died. He stole his car tires, he's a child and he stole his car tires and he made Batman laugh.

That Perception doesn't change with his rise from the dead.

What changes is Bruce's view of him now.

Now, this depends on the writer, but on the start of Jason's "coming back to Gotham to fight Bruce" arc, there is the accusation of him coming back wrong.

Of him being better before

Of something being wrong with him since the start.

The implications of his physical change as wrong in comparation to his younger self.

I find Jason's body dismorphia due to The Lazarus Pit™ very interesting,but in this case Im not referring to it as a comparation with body disphoria (even through, he does get the feeling of your body changing in ways out of your control and the trauma that surrounds it).

Im talking about Bruce's view on all of this.

Luckily, if you're trans and had supportive parents, you won't know these things by first hand experience, but many, many people do.

And Jason gets it.

Jason Todd its womanhood™ coded

This is, partially, one of th main reasons why his fanbase consists on a large part of fangirls.

Repressed rage upon the injustices you go through all your life, and once the last drop falls, said rage is weaponized. Seen as dirty, as over the top, as dangerous.

Your older self being compared to your younger self, being asked (directly or indirectly) where that sweet child™ went.

Being striped away from your body autonomy (murder, torture, resurrection against his will, whatever is going on in Batman Gotham War).

Being labeled as the most sensitive. Sometimes in a good light, sometimes not.

The burning weight of still loving parental figures that hurted you.

Topping it all, it's implied through many instances he's a feminist (yes, Im aware this is also heavily influenced by fanon interpretations of the character, but you can't deny it's still heavily implied).

All of these issues almost universal (however not exclusive) to AFAB people life experience.

There is this recognition in these wounds. "He gets it", you feel, he gets it.

He gets it in a similar way transmasc individual have an undeniable insight of these issues. He gets it in a way that feels genuine, familiar, personal.

Lastly but nor least important,

He gives me gender™ vibes. That's it, that's the argument

Over all, Jason Todd its a multifaceted, complex character. He's morally grey, his temperament ranging and mutating with each reinterpretation. Some core issues stick, others don't.

I do not hold the one and only right interpretation of this character.

We can al agree, nevertheless, that even through he's not canonically trans,

Jason todd would be a great trans ally, fighting by our side, in name of our rights, our pain but also our pride.

For that's what heroes do.

[nereidprinc3ss]

BESTIE. I was just casually thinking about your whole dybmn series and now I’m wondering, as both reader and Spencer become more confident with their spicy dynamics, what kind of lover would Spencer become with her? New k!nks, maybe?, I JUST genuinely think that Spencer is so whipped for her that he would definitely use toys and anything else, not only to experiment but to get to know and find out about all of her secret facets.

I believe she would be his “creation” like he would be so proud to see her development in her confidence in spicy times like smirking all over as she does anything to please him and he’d be like “yeah, I created that” because I’M BITING MY PILLOW RIGHT NOW and gonna dig up a hole after this to hide myself because my thoughts are so hideous. Girlie, what did you do to me? I wasn’t like this. 😩

oh let’s discuss

18+ long ass rambling and things i think about A Lot ……..

in my opinion (which is not the end all be all everyone can perceive them however they’d like) reader and spencer definitely bring out more sexually adventurous sides of each other like they just have a shit ton of chemistry and for a while ithink spencer would just be easing reader into sexuality so nothing that crazy would happen aside from the power dynamics we see pretty much from the start. i think those would definitely get stronger and occasionally more variable. im not usually into sub!spence but i think there would be times he would definitely allow reader to have more control (i don’t ever think he’d be like calling them mommy lmfao) but aside from that i could also see him veering VERY rarely in a slightly harder!dom direction. like he’ll never hurt or seriously degrade you but in p3 reader says something about liking it when he acts like they belong to him and he was really into that. as the relationship progresses i think he would almost start taking more ownership of r’s body in a way, like obviously nothing is ever nonconsensual but he just knows you so well that it’s like… well he knows you better than you know yourself sooo you let him call the shots, but at his core i think spencer is forever oriented to please. he just wants to make you feel good, that’s always gonna be his goal, so he’s always going to listen and even if the power dynamic is weighed in his favor you are actually always the one in control bc he’d do anything for u lol

in terms of kinks…. idk, i never really see spencer as a super kinky guy? like he just knows too much about paraphilia and obviously sexual violence ties into a lot of his job so i sincerely doubt he’d find giving or receiving pain arousing beyond like slapping your ass or you scratching his back or whatever. love is always at the heart of sex for him and that’s going to be the most important part, he’ll never be able to see you just as a body. he’ll always see you as the person he’s in love with and there are things he’s simply not willing to do to the person he loves.

because of his trauma he’s super duper hesitant about bondage BUT i think he wouldn’t be completely opposed to very light restraints on you or him, he’d just have to be in a specific mood. i also never see him as being someone who’s super into toys because he’s such a luddite, he can barely stand having an email i doubt he’s going to have an extensive collection of sex toys. but he would so use your vibrator on you or make you use it on yourself in front of him again if he’s in a very specific mood

oh but YES he DELIGHTS in having defiled and corrupted you. idc idc im not accepting criticism on this. like he spoils you so much that you’re used to getting him whenever you want and so you’re not very subtle about it. if you get all needy in public and start draping yourself all over him and giving him looks and pulling on his sleeve because you want to go home he’ll fuck you in rossi’s bathroom because he wants to encourage your lewd behavior.

obviously he has boundaries tho and he has respect for you and the people around him like he won’t do anything that draws attention and he’ll only ever do things he knows he can get away with without anyone else noticing

later seasons spence also LOVES when you leave marks on him he thinks it’s cute how you mark your territory and he’s not at all embarrassed if there is a hickey above his collar at work. in his mind it’s like. why would he care about other peoples opinions on his sex life when they have nothing to do with it god i think about this all the time

anyway im sorry if this was disappointing😭 idkidk, thank you for asking about my thoughts tho bc i am always down for headcanons

[mercillery]

Falling Devil Yandere Alphabet

WARNINGS: GENDER NOT SPECIFIED + YANDERE THEMES + HUMAN READER + MENTIONS OF CANNIBALISM + NOT PROOFREAD + AT SOME POINT I JUST GAVE UP + OOC I THINK OOPS

NOTES: I literally watched Shrek, Hotel Transylvania, and Ninja turtles 1 and 2 while making this. It’s ridiculous how easily I get distracted when writing but whatever.

A = Affection (How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?)

She may have existed since the beginning of time—I forgot whether this was implied or theorized—but I think someone like her is resistant to influence. let alone by such powerful emotions as love or obsession, or in this instance, both...

Thus, she finds herself engulfed in the boundless depths of her obsessive love for you, a sensation she embraces wholeheartedly. She revels in the overpowering emotions she feels, expressing her affection through tangible acts of care—such as babying you. You could say she embodies the role of a devoted butler or caregiver. While she also yearns to demonstrate her affection by preparing meals for you, she respects your aversion to the idea of consuming human food—since you’re literally a human yourself.

B = Blood (How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?)

For someone typically so polite and mature, she won't hesitate to spill blood in your name if necessary.

Key word: If

If anyone or anything dares to come between you and her or threatens your safety, she will paint every corner of the earth with their blood and guts. There is no force on earth, in heaven, or in hell that she will allow to endanger you or her relationship with you. So, if you wish to avoid a gruesome bloodshed, you better remove that person yourself before she takes matters into her own hands. With that being said, she takes both your safety and the sanctity of your relationship with her extremely seriously.

C = Cruelty (How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?)

No, she would not mock or make fun of you in any way. There's not much to elaborate on here. Just know that she won't make you feel bad for being so easily abducted by her. On the contrary, she’ll only express her pleasure and satisfaction that you’re finally with her. She'll gently caress your teary cheeks, her touch tender but completely dismissive of your tears, focusing solely on the joy she feels at finally having you all to herself.

D = Darling (Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling's will?)

I have a strong feeling that she likes to baby you a lot. Do you know what this means?

This means that she'll hover over you, constantly attending to your every need as if you're incapable of managing on your own. Each morning, instead of allowing you the autonomy to dress yourself, she takes charge, dressing you in outfits she deems the cutest. It's akin to a child's intense fixation on their cherished doll, with her playing the role of the child and you, unwittingly, cast as the doll. It's a twisted dynamic where her sense of power is derived from your perceived reliance on her, blurring the lines between caregiver and captor.

To add to that, her control extends beyond mere clothing choices. Understanding your human needs, she recognizes the necessity of regular meals for your well-being. However, unfortunately for you, her culinary expertise lies in cooking humans for sustenance. Despite this, she will persistently coax you into sampling her cuisine, assuring you that it is as delectable as any other meat. But don’t worry, she refrains from actually preparing the meal unless you explicitly express a desire to try it. And should you muster the courage to taste her food, it's important that you maintain a facade of enjoyment, for the consequences of expressing your dislike for the dish she so lovingly prepared for you are dire. In essence, she wouldn’t force you to eat her dishes—but if you express wanting to try them, you better finish it all.

E = Exposed (How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?)

She's not particularly emotive, nor does she wear her feelings on her sleeve. It's not that she's ashamed of her emotions—she simply tends to maintain a cool and composed demeanor most of the time. However, since she's fallen deeply in love with you, she has no qualms about revealing the extent of her love. The only emotion she may hesitate to display around you is her anger. Nevertheless, she'll willingly show you her vulnerability.

F = Fight (How would they feel if their darling fought back?)

Honestly? The first few times you rebel against her, she'll stay composed, not lashing out at you. However, if you start fighting against her consistently…

She’ll be offended. Very offended.

She's given you all her patience, tolerance, love, and support—and this is how you repay her? By infuriating her with your constant disobedience? How disrespectful of you! She isn't one to tolerate such defiance. You've tested her limits, and now you must face the consequences. Prepare for some very strict scolding from the chef herself.

G = Game (Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?)

Absolutely, this isn't a game to her, not in the slightest. She doesn't joke about this—her relationship with you is far from anything resembling a game. She regards the relationship with the utmost importance and doesn't even entertain the thought of trivializing it as such.

You're sorely mistaken if you think she derives any amusement from watching you attempt to escape her loving embrace. Because spoiler alert: she doesn't. I'll concede that, depending on the ingenuity of your escape plan, she might be slightly impressed. However, her predominant emotions will be disappointment and frustration at your decision to flee from her and the love she offers.

H = Hell (What would be their darling's worst experience with them?)

Anytime you’re eating.

She's the sole creator of your meals—breakfast, lunch, dinner, you name it. After all, she's literally hell's chef—whose culinary prowess could possibly rival hers? Admittedly, her dishes typically feature ingredients of the human variety, but just because you're human doesn't mean you can't partake! However, since she respects your reluctance to try them, she prepares normal food for you (steak, spaghetti, soup, or whatever). Surprisingly, despite her expertise in cooking humans, her skills extend seamlessly to crafting dishes that humans typically enjoy, something you’re very grateful for! Otherwise, if not for that, you’re sure she would’ve made you a cannibal long ago.

The reason I consider this your worst experience with her is because every single time she insists on coaxing you into trying her food, persuading you to try something different, and promising it will delight your taste buds. It gets to the point of annoyance. Once, in an attempt to end her relentless persuasion, you reluctantly accept—only to discover she had prepared a rather huge meal made entirely of human flesh. You're left with the choice of either eating it all or giving it a try but then spitting it out, leading to voicing your dislike of the food she so lovingly made, which ultimately results in her extreme frustration—which then escalates to the point of endangering your life, making it an unforgettable and traumatizing ordeal.

I feel like this part didn’t make much sense. Oops.

I = Ideals (What kind of future do they have in mind for/ with their darling?)

Her vision of a future with you isn't unreasonable, at least not in her eyes. All she desires is your total and complete obedience, love, and loyalty. She envisions a time when you abandon every trace of rebellion and disobedience from your soul, mind, and body, allowing her to love and care for you without resistance. She wants to choose your outfits, pamper you with her affection, follow you everywhere, and shower your face with kisses. The ultimate fulfillment of her dream would be you finally letting go of your human morals and indulging in the delicious meals she prepares: limbs and body parts of humans.

J = Jealousy (Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope?)

When our beloved chef is jealous, she maintains a veneer of professionalism. Well, kind of. She confronts the source of her jealousy without hesitation, but there's an unmistakable edge to her demeanor. You can sense her annoyance, even if she tries to mask it. Think of it like this: she addresses the situation directly, yet her words and actions carry a subtle, simmering irritation that makes her feelings clear.

"Excuse me, this is my partner," she'll assert calmly, her tone tinged with a hint of annoyance, her closed eyes twitching slightly in suppressed anger.

Now, depending on the response of the other person, things can unfold in one of two ways: she unleashes her wrath, using her powers to invert gravity on the offender, therefore making that person fall upwards into the sky, inevitably plunging them into the very door that leads to hell. Or she’ll opt for a warning, her tone conveying the gravity of the situation without resorting to immediate punishment.

K = Kisses (How do they act around or with their darling?)

She remains the same: polite and composed. However, some wouldn't be mistaken if they claimed to notice a faint smile on her face whenever you're around—a silent expression of her pleasure and relief at having you near. Regarding possession, it's likely evident to most people. Depending on the situation, like when she's on the hunt for humans who have the ingredients required for whatever dish she’s working on, she might have her arm firmly around your waist or wrist—perhaps to the extent that you're lifted slightly off the ground, unable to touch it anymore. She's tall, very tall, and she's aware that there will come a point where you can't keep up with her anymore, so she occasionally employs one of those long arms of hers to lift you off the ground, if only just slightly.

L = Love letters (How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?)

She wouldn’t. She strikes me as someone who watches from afar.

But the moment she realizes the intensity of her feelings for you, she won't hesitate for a second. She'll approach you directly and declare, "You belong to me now."

No matter your answer, you're hers now.

M = Mask (Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?)

Absolutely not. She couldn't care less about who witnesses her overwhelming love and obsession for you. If anyone were to dare to call her out on it, she'd simply turn her head in their direction, her eyes closed as always, and dismiss them, urging them to give you and her some space.

N = Naughty (How would they punish their darling?)

Scolding. That's her method of discipline. She'll be as stern as necessary during scoldings, but physical harm is off the table. Still, she's strict and unforgiving in her approach. You might initially believe that a mere scolding won't affect you much, but trust me, when she scolds you, you'll find yourself feeling surprisingly remorseful. She has a way of making you question yourself, leaving you wondering why you feel so guilty after her scolding is over. In short, you may underestimate the impact of her scolding at first, but eventually, it starts to hit you.

O = Oppression (How many rights would they take away from their darling?)

Honestly, she wouldn't strip away many rights from you. The only ones she'll take are your right to privacy and your right to choose your own outfits, as she insists on selecting and dressing you herself. If you dare to voice complaints, she'll simply brush them aside, reminding you that she's seen countless human bodies—after all, she literally cooks humans.

P = Patience (How patient are they with their darling?)

She's patient enough to tolerate a few complaints from you, but insults are where she draws the line. Just keep yourself in her good graces, and the chances of her becoming angry with you decrease significantly. By staying on her good side, I mean offering her your complete and unwavering obedience, love, and loyalty.

Q = Quit (If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?)

If you were to meet your demise, she'd make it her mission to avenge you and ensure that whoever was responsible for your death pays the ultimate price. She'll deliver a punishment far worse than hell itself. So rest assured, if you were to meet such a fate, she'd be seeking revenge in your name. Until she looks in every corner and crevice of the earth to avenge your death, she won’t be able to move on.

The only time I can see her actually moving on from your death is if you were to die under natural circumstances.

If you were to escape, resentment would begin to fester and swell within her heart at your sudden departure. The idea of her beloved leaving her so abruptly would fuel an ever-growing sense of bitterness within her. Each passing moment would only serve to intensify this gnawing feeling of resentment, pulling at her heartstrings with increasing force day by day. Consequently, she won't be able to move on until she finds you again. However, her motivation for seeking you out would no longer stem from her immense love but from the overwhelming resentment and anger that now consumes her.

R = Regret (Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?)

No, she doesn't experience a single iota of guilt when she abducts you. Guilt isn't an emotion she's familiar with, nor does she see a reason to entertain it. After all, why should she feel guilty? She now has the person she loves most closer to her than ever, and if anything, she's pleased by the outcome.

Moreover, she won't ever release her hold on you. You'll never be granted freedom from her grasp until the day you draw your final breath, which will likely occur due to natural circumstances such as old age, a heart attack, or any other form of disease.

S = Stigma (What brought about this side of them? childhood, curiosity, etc?)

Curiosity.

As a devil who typically sees humans as nothing more than necessary ingredients for her dishes, she doesn't usually care or think much of them. That is, until she meets you. You must have caught her eye because there was something undeniably different about you, something that sparked her curiosity and ultimately caused her to fall for you—hard. I'm talking about the kind of fall where she face-plants the floor type hard.

T = Tears (How do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?)

She still doesn't feel a drop of guilt when she sees you cry, isolate yourself, or scream. The closest she ever comes to guilt is disappointment—and guilt and disappointment aren't even in the same realm, so you can already imagine how that goes. However, she won't feel disappointment toward you unless you scream; in that case, her disappointment is directed at you. If you isolate yourself or cry, she'll be disappointed in herself for making you feel this way—I guess you could say this is her own way of feeling "guilt." In those instances, she'll try to comfort you—so that's a small consolation. But if you scream, she’ll simply tell you to knock it off.

U = Unique (Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?)

My mind is actually so blank at this point that I cannot think, so please just take this: She won't ever physically harm you—not even mentally.

V = Vice (What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?)

Remember all the times I mentioned how she desperately wants you to try her food, but you refuse because eating human meat would make you a cannibal? Well, here's a potential advantage: if you tell her you want to try her dishes, you’ll surprise her. She'll enthusiastically prepare the meal, and that's your moment—it's either now or never. While she's cooking, you have your chance to make a run for it. But be cautious; she's a long-legged woman with enough stamina to catch up to you within mere seconds. So, act wisely.

W = Wit's end (Would they ever hurt their darling?)

No.

Not sure if this counts, but you know how she only targets humans if they're necessary ingredients for her dishes? Well, here's the great news for you: you're not and will never be an option as an ingredient for her. You are the only human she will never, ever consider attacking, regardless of whether you possess one of the ingredients she's seeking. Even if all the ingredients for her dish happen to be everything that you are, she will never turn to you as a food source. She'll scour every corner and crevice of the earth if necessary, but she'll never resort to cooking you. (This part was supposed to go into the unique section, but I changed my mind because it felt wrong. So if this doesn’t make sense, sorry💪😞)

Yeah, in essence, she'll never inflict harm upon you. While your worst experiences with her may have been near-death encounters, she'll never actually harm you. The most she'll do in terms of hurting you is exert a firm grip. That's it.

X = Xoanon (How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?)

She's not a worshipper, but her actions might suggest otherwise. The way she cares for you feels akin to that of a devoted caregiver. She insists on dressing you herself, feeding you, and accompanying you everywhere. It's understandable if you interpret her actions as worship, but to her, it's not about worship—it's simply about loving you that much.

And no, she's not going to any extraordinary lengths to win you over because in her mind, you're already hers. There's no need for her to go to such lengths when you're already with her.

Y = Yearn (How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?)

Y’know how I just mentioned that in her mind, you're already hers? Well, I doubt you share the same sentiment, do you? She's not oblivious, and she's well aware that you likely don't reciprocate her feelings. If your feelings toward her remain unchanged even with all her persuasions, she'll remain surprisingly patient for quite some time. What I'm getting at is that her endurance in trying to win you over during the relationship is remarkable. I can't envision her snapping at you, no matter how much time passes as she endeavors to capture your heart.

Hoping this part made sense 😗

Z = Zenith (Would they ever break their darling?)

Like I've hammered home countless times, no—not mentally, not physically, but perhaps emotionally. Remember when I mentioned how her scolding can make you question whether you're truly ungrateful for her love? Well, emotions play a significant role in that scolding too. She doesn't necessarily toy with your emotions, but she aims for you to feel at least a tiny tinge of guilt for every instance you've angered or disappointed her.

[sincerelystesichorus]

me becoming a gortash apologist apparently

i never thought i'd say this. i am thinking about Enver Gortash. i'm usually not one of his apologists but... i've had brain rot for my Durge lately, and i think a big moment of developing your Durge is how you react to meeting Gortash again, yeah? you may or may not be close with Karlach but the party and Durge especially have all faced similar trauma of betrayal and exploitation nonetheless (and so has Gortash), he's already been introduced vaguely at the end of Act 2 as a threat/main villain, he worships Bane, he has general edge lord vibes (remember that bit where I'm usually not a Gortash apologist djdjdjd); what i'm trying to spit out, is there's a lot to sway you against Gortash in that first meeting. and I'd argue even a little further, as someone that followed Orin's plans of betrayal against him in my first Tav run, (just because her audacity is so damn funny.)

But anyway. Meeting Gortash. Finding out you used to be close. Perhaps homoerotically, perhaps in a strange platonic manner, or some other third thing, but nonetheless, Durge is assumably the only person Gortash has ever truly liked. He just really goes out of his way with praise at meeting again, the use of the word favorite is notable, and if Gortash had anyone worth elevating, he would, right? That was how Ketheric got here, Orin wants more credibility for herself and the Bhaalists, and Gortash... just enslaves his parents in their old home/business. But he liked you. He's really so similar to Astarion (it's nothing, you're just the only person I've ever truly cared for); he's just already a touch too far gone in his power hungry search for security. He's already repeated the cycle, years and years ago with Karlach as the main example and just the inevitability of being Bane's Chosen. And yet - Durge comes marching through the door again with this band of misfits and his old lackey he wronged, and he's willing to make a true bargain.

And I know it's just in Gortash's character to scheme, but l think playing as reformed Durge makes Gortash's potential deal all the more devastating, since he will truly follow through on his word (or, at least he would.)

It's so funny to show up dating Astarion or Shadowheart, and imagine them teasing you later that night, saying they thought you'd have better taste. Or the bitterness of being with Karlach, knowing that you seemed to be in such deep kahoots. And so on. The point is not valuing that past relationship with Gortash. Focusing on the shiny and new.

And like whatever. Gortash isn't ever going to publicly present that his feelings are hurt but like... wouldn't they? Your past lover or at the very least, only close friend struts in, now thinking they're some big shot, so beyond everything you two had ever done... when you always lived in their shadow beforehand, frankly. Gortash adores how this flawless plan was majorly Durge's, critiques Orin's sloppy manner of filling your place, how Ketheric was just a means to an end. But he liked you. The person who helped him raid Mephistopheles' vault, in turn helping him spit not only in the arch devil's face, but his past captor, Raphael's too (since Raph lives chronically in the shadow of his father, imo.) The person who thought they could formulate and enact this whole plot, and the only one he was willing to follow, to be an equal with, now coming to tell him what everyone always does, inevitably.

A final fuck you, or some form of betrayal, the same thing that caused his mess all those years ago when sold off to that warlock.

It would have to hurt, and while it's funny to imagine my little gnome Durge dying inside and cackling to the party about sleeping with an enemy and technically being the enemy... a little obssessed at the angst you could perceive of Gortash somehow falling for any crazy Bhaalspawn, nonetheless Durge, who was never one for morals, coming back renewed and not to come get him or work things out... but to slay him or turn against him. I'd send the Steelwatchers after our asses too.

In conclusion, Gortash, probably:

sigh. my bias against greasy little guys could never truly make me hate you, enver gortash. look at you, the man that you are.

[moontyger]

It’s all but done now, and my numbness and rage has morphed into a deep and painful sadness for what this means for my generation, my children’s childhoods, and the women and trans people and Black and immigrant communities who will be torn apart by this.

At the time of writing, it’s too early to say exactly what happened. But it’s likely that young angry, lonely, entitled men turned out to punish women and hoard the power they perceive they get from a culture of say whatever you want, persecuted, Hogan-Rogan hypermasculinity. To be clear, I have very little tolerance for entertaining himpathy or even curiosity about such voters. We need a different tack. We’re all lonely and disenfranchised. This ain’t it.

This country clearly hates women and wants us to suffer under the thumb of men, alone in our homes pushing out babies and providing sex on demand, and we need to stop dancing around this long held American reality.

It’s not the economy. It’s misogyny, it’s racism, it’s patriarchy, it’s late capitalism. It’s the belief that one’s grocery bill and “pocketbook” matter more than women’s full citizenship, dignity and human life. I’m already beyond frustrated and fed up with those who will blame feminism or women for what is clearly a culture of misogyny and racism gone wild—and always already at the rotten core.

I hope this horror galvanizes us further, pulls us closer. But women’s feelings of betrayal, erasure, and fear won’t soon fade. We will carry this. And as I’ve said, I don’t think men and women’s relationships will ever be the same. I hope they are not.

So many people are going to kick into blame, attack, police, patrol, soften, normalize, hot take, lessen, rationalize—and try to rush us away from our anger and grief. I’m going to dwell in the pain and loss and obviously then I will keep going, as women always have.

[prettyboysdontlookatexplosions]

i think if you have a special relationship with reading fiction it is easy to imagine there is some specialness inherent in reading or written fiction, but my hunch - unproven and probably unprovable - is that many people do and, especially, many people always have (or always since the dawn of something approximating mass literacy & a publishing industry i guess) read books simply because they were bored and wanted something to occupy their time and the perceived value of the books wasn’t much beyond that if anything. and if that’s the case then it just makes a certain mathematical sense that with more options for occupying one’s leisure time, reading books would take up less of the pie chart; it’s less a question of humanity giving up, like, moby dick in favor of harry potter, and more of giving up Whatever Tawdry Penny Dreadful in favor of true crime podcasts. like i really believe in any honest accounting of human reading hours across our species history, garbage is gonna take up a huge chunk of the pie chart. and i also think that having strong opinions in any direction about what adults do in their private leisure time that is not, like, falling into online radicalization holes or whatever is, totally separate from questions of morality or ethics or meanness or taste, cringe loser behavior far beyond what literally any leisure time proclivities (again, excluding the qanon ones or whatever) could ever be

[cypionate60mg]

Does this make me a chaser?

I'm turned on by the idea of having a mlm/bara coded relationship with a woman. I want to see her get turned into a hulking sex-crazed beast and have people think I'm her cute little twink (even if I looked like Dwayne Johnson ppl should think that).

I love scrolling through autoandrophilic content on tumblr even if I know it's not for me, and can't shrug off the feeling that I, as a cishet guy, am being fetishistic towards trans men. But then I see posts about top surgery and all I can think is lying my face on top of a woman's broad, hard and hairy chest and being like "yeah, this feels a lot better," her scars like those of a barbarian warlord. Which I guess is not great, knowing that this is specifically about men who want to be perceived as men.

I've never attempted to be with a trans guy, bc I know that'd be kind of shitty coming from a straight dude (also they might be autogynephilic, and it would be some kind of cosmic joke for me to be playing into forced detrans). But even if I did, whenever I check r/ftm and see posts about dating straight men I can only feel like the reasons why I would are categorically different (not that it wouldn't be problematic for me to do so). Like, these guys are hellbent on feminizing them (many don't even allow them to bind), which besides sounding like they're massive transphobes, it's just impossible for me to see myself doing the same. Even if I saw my partner as a woman, I wouldn't miss out on the chance of having him undergo hrt (all the better, in fact).

I wish there were (straight) women into the same stuff, but at least within my experience, there are none out there. So I guess I just have whatever I can find on tumblr and melonFF's deviantart (and maybe ao3 accounts none of which post frequently), none of which are directed at me, so I just feel unwelcome enjoying them.

I don't usually answer these sorts of anons, as I get quite a few from cisbi and cishet men. But we're starting to see more cis men in the forcemascsphere, including some with their own blogs, and I think this could be a good opportunity to talk about chasers. For everybody's sake.

Based on this message, here's my read on the situation. You're interacting with the kink through a strictly pornographic lens and are subsequently disappointed that it doesn't translate well to sex. Whether you see your hypothetical partner as a man or not doesn't really matter, because you don't even seem to be thinking about them as a human with their own needs and desires. You're following a recipe for objectification, don't be surprised. Like any kink performed between two or more parties, it does require consent and discussion. Especially because it has elements of transformation and force.

It's honestly a little funny to me to see you talk about how uncommon forcemasc is, bellyaching that even the existing porn for it doesn't cater to you. Man, how do you think I feel? And whether somebody is into forcemasc or forcefem, we all deserve to be treated with respect by our partners. Even if playing out our kink results in physical changes beyond the bedroom. So, yeah, of course those guys you're talking about are assholes. But that doesn't really mean anything, because we're talking about you and your desires.

If you are heterosexual, then why are you scrolling r/ftm and musing about the ethics of dating a trans guy? I mean that genuinely. What do you get out of it? I ask because I'd like to believe that you understand that not all trans men are autoandrophiles. Even I don't want to be forcemasced, which people seem to have a difficult time grasping. Once you start thinking of a type of person as synonymous with a fetish, you're in chaser territory.

Remember: pornography can be a useful extension of sex. A tool, an accessory. But if you treat it as a cheap substitute for sex, you will lose sight of the other people involved. Then they'll become nothing more than a means for you to accomplish your own satisfaction. Do you see how that's fundamentally different from viewing one's own body as a means of pleasure?

So yeah, you do sound like a chaser.

[thebestofoneshots]

This is so out of nowhere but do you think Sirius would want to get married and start a family? Like kids and stuff. Both as a character in canon and in GC. I’ve been thinking about it deep and hard lately. And i wanted to know what you think? cause i believe you have such good grasp on him (and other marauders era characters as well).

Oh, this is a brilliant question! At first, I wasn't sure, but the more I thought about it, the more it made sense in my head, so hear me out:

I think Sirius was absolutly horrified by the idea of marriage in early teens. He was beyond scared since the marriages he was mostly exposed to when he was a child weren't born of love, but rather of political arrangements.

I think he sees marriage as an institution (he hates those) that his parents were ready to ascribe themselves –and him– to. A political ploy for power or blood purity or whatever it might be the Blacks had in their eyes at the time. Not something to aspire to, but something to repudiate (like he did with most Noble House of Black-related things).

In fact, I think part of Sirius' playboy persona was born from this, he thought relationships weren't all that, and was scared of commitment bc he thought he knew how they would end, which is why he dated around instead of devoting himself to a relationship. His behaviour was somewhat of a defence mechanism against his perceived inevitability of future failure (also it enraged Walburga and Sirius would have done anything to enrage her).

When Sirius got to live with the Potters, and the more time he spent with them (wasn't that much, unfortunately), he saw that things weren't always the same. That relationships didn't have to be toxic and they didn't have to end the way they did in the Black family.

He learned that not all relationships are about give and take, but some are just about giving and receiving, and he was fascinated by this. He finally understood why James wanted a relationship (and a marriage) with Lily.

And while this gave Sirius a new perspective on how things can be, it didn't erase the fact that he was scared of it. He was scared that he was too much of a Black and he wouldn't be able to have something like the Potters, but instead, he would inevitably end up like his parents –because it was in his blood.

I think the same applies to children, Sirius is too scared to be like his parents and fuck his children up, although I do think he likes kids since he always proved to be fond of Harry, Ron and Hermione after he met them. But especially Harry, he loved him like he had been his own kid, or I guess the same way he loved James, like family.

Having said that, and while I don't think Sirius would expect a grandiose wedding or anything of the sort, I do think, after some time and finding a partner that he loves and living with them for a while, and therefore knowing what it is to be in a relationship with them and having evidence that he wouldn't end like his parents, he could entertain the idea of marriage, and would eventually open to one (perhaps even to having children).

Same thing applies to GC Sirius, in fact, and you'll see this once the chapters have been posted, but Sirius is already entertaining an idea similar to this while watching the Potters during the Christmas break (Still a few chapters to go, though).

Read Gilded Constellations

Sidenote: This was really fun!! I love psychoanalysing characters.

[ovaryacted]

Okay I’m home and chilled out, so I’m just gonna ramble about my thoughts/analysis that I keep having about perceiving Leon Kennedy as a sexual being. This might be long. I also want to reiterate that my word is not law, and everyone has their own hcs and stuff and that’s okay!

I know hard dom content is very popular across the erotica/smut medium as a whole. Rough sex has always been popular and trust me, I’m a fan too. But if I can be controversial for like two seconds, I don’t see Leon as a hard dom personally. Closest thing would be a rough daddy dom, but to me Leon always gave me someone who caters to their partner. He’s loving and affectionate, a little rugged and awkward sure, but nonetheless he cares and wants to give a good experience.

He studies his partner, learns about what makes them tick, what makes them moan, how their body responds to different stimuli. Leon is a perceptive human being, he observes things before fully handling them so he can take the best approach that gives him the best results. I think he’d approach sex the same way if he’s with someone that he cares for.

In a weird way, I also don’t think Leon is a sex god of sorts. He’d have to find the time and ability to actually experiment with different dynamics and kinks to figure out what he likes too. It’ll all be a learning process for him, but to me Leon is someone that prioritizes his partner’s pleasure above his own because that’s what gets him off. If you feel good, he feels good. He gets off on getting you off type of deal, that’s who he is.

I also think Leon’s sexual dynamics depend on where he is in his life. When he’s younger, he’s naive, grasping on to whatever makes sense so he’d be more inclined to letting someone else lead and show him things he wouldn’t know at first (hence why a lot of ppl write RE2 Leon as a sub). As he gets older, gets more experience here and there, he’d try building more of his own confidence and autonomy and realize he has the ability to take control. Consider RE4/ID/RE6, he’s smarter, more aged, more mature (it’s the trauma), so he’d be more able to take charge like others paint him out to be but I don’t think he’d be inherently “aggressive”, far from it really. He’s serious about communication and being vocal, because he has to hear whether or not he’s doing the right thing or he needs to tweak something for a better experience. He’s not selfish he’s a sweetheart, that I can stand ten toes on.

The period of time in Vendetta to me is where I would see the rough sex come out because he’ll be using it as a means of self harm. He wouldn’t want to hurt another person, but more so he doesn’t care about himself, so his actions will be considered “reckless” and he won’t realize the consequences of what he does until after it happens. He’s suicidal, depressed, an alcoholic, and exhausted with life…so whatever he does in the bedroom would reflect that. Leon would probably want someone to fuck him instead of the other way around, but what he says he wants vs what he really wants deep down would be considered two things. He says he wants the rough stuff and he’s detached when in reality he wants to be comforted and wants someone to treat him like a human being, not something to be discarded. He just wouldn’t vocalize that because he doesn’t think his wants or needs matter. You’d have to read him and dictate for yourself because he’s too ashamed of saying it out loud. (I will say Vendetta Leon is one of my favorite variations of him and he deserves all the love and safety his other versions get! He’s just an angst magnet lmao).

Now in DI and beyond, he has healthier relationship with things, probably more aware of his alcohol consumption and age, and possibly going to therapy. In a way, I think Leon at this age would be far more inclined to revert back to the way he was at 21, little childish, letting someone else lead because he finds safety in that. Many people believe submission assumes someone loses their power entirely, but the way I perceive it, it’s you being able to trust someone else to make decisions for you in your best interest.

So he would be very switchy as he gets he’s older, liking being submissive because that allows him to turn his brain off and let someone else take charge for him. He won’t have to make the choices for once, and either way so long as his partner feels good, he feels good.

As a dynamic character, this is just how I perceive Leon, and to me he’s more of a pleasure dom, and probably likes being dominated but it’ll take him a while to be comfortable in doing that after everything. Hence, why I want to write for sub Leon more, because I think he deserves to just feel safe in giving up control he never really had in his life.