#and beyond that i dont think its that big a deal that i dont ever come out like . officially

[listen-to-the-inner-walrus]

did anyone else not know that kate middleton hasnt been publicly seen since christmas and also that apparently thats a big deal? or was that just me?

[spiders-notagain]

Misc Headcanons

[Stuff I don't know how to make its own post]

legendary lost city buried under the sand somewhere; minecraft buried cities style

cliff cities- used to be a big fortress now just used for daily living

mostly specific monasteries

extremely good water recycling system- technology to make water out of hydrogen and oxygen in the air

if breakfasts are things that are easy to obtain then plomeek must be obtained regularly (e.g. grown throughout the year, incredibly hardy plants)

valley cities- alderaan style

shikahr historically very good land, less earthquakes and harsh conditions

large areas of the planet irradiated by radiation and theres not much they can do about it, no ones allowed to go there without special protection

some areas that are civilized have been ruined by their ancestors and are only just starting to restore its natural state

no birthdays but some places have a quincenera coming of age equivalent * sometimes in addition to the kahs-wan and taloth trials

Vulcans are pretty direct and so an acceptable form of making friends (although its really more like conversation partners) is to go up to a person and tell them that you share an interest and would like to talk about it. This is no guarantee youll ever interact again though.

Vulcan has a lot of jobs that are restricted to native citizens

Need mental contact to survive as babies the same way humans require touch

Tight knit families heralding from olden days. Almost mafia like in its web of connections. Additionally, alliances with certain clans meant status and power.

Alot of infighting between clans in the earlier days also

Similar to Ant colonies underground

Buildings have sections above and below ground

Above ground, buildings protected from sandstorms. Few windows, more doors. The less open to the elements the better.

Sehlats were tamed more recently than dogs, usually they would offer protection to the vulcans in exchange for food

Black and brown hair extremely common, genes for blond or red hair extremely rare

Early books made out of leather and a cotton-like fiber

later books made out of stone paper

Water very rare, lots of it is a sign of wealth.

Given the newness of logic, theyre not very good at it and struggle to apply it in day to day life. Additionally theyre good at lying to themselves about what emotion they may or may not have

Multiple different sects bc everyone has a different opinion on whats logical

Some are better adjusted than others because some try their absolute best to

Very preppy- high ego, strong social classes, pretentious, hide any faults, care alot about their reputation, fear being ostracized in their own community, many social rules

vulcans generally prefer to keep humans away from their sehlats because humans try to be overly affectionate with them and end up severely harmed

Vulcans get hit with winter depression even harder than other species but deal with it better. Their own ships are set up to have sun lamps all over the ship.

vulcans view mental illnesses with the same seriousness as physical ones.

not only can vulcans pass on mental disorders to their children but also strong phobias (and some philias) even those obtained through later trauma

typically mothers during pregnancy thought to occur during the mental bond

the prenatal mental bond can pass on memories as well but are typically suppressed till adulthood. its more of a folk wives tale thats corroborated enough that most people agree but technically had little proven evidence until recently

vulcans think murder by drowning is one of the worst most senseless murders ever

vulcans be like  🤓☝️well actually-

vulcan school systems dont have an above and beyond grade because the highest possible grade to get is by default you meeting the acceptable standards. that said, they do have extra awards given out for such behavior. although acceptable standards by vulcan standards is somewhat higher than is what is the case for human standards

vulcan kids still do the same 'kid logic' thing as humans because theyre trying to reason and understand the world using the logical reasoning skills being taught to them but they dont have enough information to make it accurate

Vulcan vegetables are bred to have a higher concentration of nutrients, a project that has been in development for the thousand some years since the awakening

passive cooling methods going back thousands of years; more advanced than human technologies

windcatcher like structures built to incorporate: the structure of the house, local weather, local geographical phenomena, etc.

heavily populated cities may have hybrid cooling systems that are integrated with modern technology to increase efficiency, this is less common in more rural areas where ppl are more likely to be 'if it aint broke dont fix it'. in most cases though they were so well designed that not much is needed aside from general maintenance

depending on the location, most vulcan homes are designed with the concept that a bedroom is exclusively for sleep and like wardrobe changing. you dont usually engage in hobby activities, doing those in a separate entertainment room or in the equivalent living room

like the rest of their society, vulcans incorporate more circles into their architectural designs than humans do and less squares than humans do

glass art is one of the oldest vulcan art forms. their planetary conditions work very well for it: lots of sand, high heat. and its an art that features alot of mathematically appealing shape language

ex. those curvy glass vases with the holes, floor mosaics with tinted glass, stained glass windows, suncatchers, etc.

in ancient times, betrothal jewelry (and other ceremonial purposes) were made partly with copper wire crafted from the blood of their enemies. some of these pieces (and spare wires) still exist. Vulcan clans that still practice this, obtain the blood ethically from dead animals (or in extremely rare occasions, consenting dead relatives)

STARSHIPS

Constructed so that every system is at max efficiency when used exactly perfectly how its meant to.

Its interlocking systems mean that it has millions of tiny unobtrusive glitches that can happen to the point where one can reasonably predict based on the type of glitch exactly what deeper system is failing and why

While it has normal passwords it mostly relies on each person to have their own special bioelectric pattern that is measured each time a user touches the console in order for them to input anything at all

They dont like outsiders on their ships as crew because they make tiny mistakes that while easily fixable, can mess up major systems

Sun lamps all over the ship as natural lighting, they gradually turn off according to the vulcan solar cycle and are replaced by a secondary lighting system that mimics candlelight. Although its kinda dark for humans its just fine for vulcans

Because of the size of their ships, they often have really large 'halls' that take up multiple decks and serve as visual space for the different wings connected to them

the vulcan warp rings compared to the human twin nacelles serve different attributes with the analogy being like a train versus a car. trains are faster but theyre also bulky, dont slow down well and arent designed to make quick on the spot diversions

[a-mel0n]

This stupid "Your Name" Bucktommy AU won't leave my brain, and while I don't have enough faith in my writing skills to actually write the damn thing (and it would be my first fanfic... ever?? and that's a project that seems a bit too big for me lmao), I DID write down what I'm picturing some of the "rules" Buck and Tommy have for each other while in the other's body. Mostly just for fun. (Because Tommy would be switching in 2006, the iPhone does not exist yet, so all of his notes are written in an actual physical journal. All of Buck's notes would be on the Notes app of his phone)

TOMMY: 1) Evan, stop running into burning buildings when you don’t have to while in my body. If I wake up in a hospital bed for the fifth time this month, I might actually lose it.

its part of the job to save as many ppl as possible. also u don’t even feel the pain when i get injured in ur body.

You’re right, I don’t. Unfortunately, the pain from having a wooden beam fall on you doesn't just magically go away when we swap. Just... be more careful? Please?

fine. i’ll try and keep ur hospital visits to a minimum.

2) Can you stop flirting with people on calls? Or at the very least give them your number and not mine? In the last week alone my contact list has nearly doubled because you keep giving people my number. 

dude its not my fault you’re more popular while i’m you. just think of it as me being ur wingman! how u dont have a girlfriend is beyond me btw. hot chicks love firefighters and ur a good looking dude

Jesus Christ, Evan. For the last time, I’m single by choice.

3) Don’t shower while in my body

already dont

4) Don’t go to the bathroom while in my body 

done

5) In fact, unless you’re at work, don’t change any of my clothes while in my body. 

fair

6) Do you really need to spend so much of my paychecks on cooking supplies? I have enough pots and pans already. 

whats the point of a pantry if its half empty. be thankful ur getting actual food now via my leftovers instead of the utter tragedy that was the state of ur fridge when we first started swapping places.

7) Don’t make a scene while at work. 

your boss sucks ass and his stupid orders are going to get people killed. im not gonna listen to him if hes making bad calls while lives are on the line

Evan.

8) Don’t pick up the phone when my dad calls.

got it

BUCK: 1) quit going to eddie’s basketball pickup games. he keeps inviting me while i’m in my own body and its getting harder and harder to come up with excuses as to why i can’t go. it's kinda awkward.

I thought you’d be more grateful, Evan. You’re the coolest guy on the court when I’m you. 

2) are you making movie references when ur me? bc chim keeps asking when i got so “cultured” and the other day maddie asked when i watched the princess bride. 

You haven’t seen the Princess Bride? I’m leaving you a surprise for tomorrow. Check your couch when you wake up. 

did you spend my OWN money on a dvd??? i don’t even own a dvd player. i own every streaming service imaginable.

3) keep the finger guns to a minimum?? idk why you do them so much but both hen and chim have said smth abt it

4) if u get a call from someone called connor or kameron on my phone just let it go to voicemail its personal stuff and i'll deal with it

Evan, you could have told me you agreed to be a sperm donor yourself. Finding out because Connor and Kameron showed up at the fire house was more of a shock than finding out over these memos would have been. 

they did what?????

5) don’t talk to my parents

Done.

6) No rule about undressing? 

dude idc. i’m not gonna stop you from taking a piss in my body if u need to. as long as you like. don’t have sex with someone while you’re me? oh wait hang on i DO have a rule about undressing

7) DON’T HAVE ANY RANDOM HOOK UPS IN MY BODY. 

Wasn’t planning on it, but good to know. 

[shreddeddescent]

OKAY!!!!

okay. so. i want to share this for anyone who is like.... cool about this worst case scenario bullshit i keep talking about. i think im writing it kinda good or at least in a compelling way, and honestlyyyy i just wanna post shit to be like hey. im having fun with it, and i think its really interesting to see how it all turns out. i think its been fun every other time ive posted about it, you guys seem to like it, but this is the part that will come off the most weird. if you dont know, ive tagged all previous things in this timeline as #wcs (worst case scenario)

so i think yall get this is like. the fucked up timeline. but like that its the going to be okay timeline too.

to explain more about it if you dont know, lets just say like. shredder did the fucked up thing he wanted. i think ive made that clear in previous posts about this. shredders dead now. they had to deal with the consequences of what he did to them. if the implications of that squick you out its totally fine. if youre not sure what i mean, im sorry. you DO NOT need to read further. but theres nothing specific about it here, this is just alllll the result of that. the results will be made clear by the end.

they went to big mama's hotel to get help from her with said consequences. its been dealt with. theyre now just recovering, being normal kids, still going to therapy. they're coping. but big mama's help always comes with a cost, but they havent figured out what that cost was yet.

so like. its been fun to explore in writing. IF YOURE WILLING to hear me out about all the fucked up shit turning out okay, feel free to read further. even if it sounds weird. i hope everyone can just be like.... respectful.

this doesnt have to be canon to the rest of my au, but if youve enjoyed it when ive talked about it....this is a big reveal shit for that timeline. if you are cool about everything im implying so far.

if youre not, again, you dont have to read forward. this isnt mature rated or anything, its just the implications of what the characters have been through are dark.

but the characters are going to be okay. and this right here is the reason they will be.

okay? okay. please be fucking nice.

missing context would be: raph saw someone in their room the night before, but he thinks he made it up. donnie also saw what he thinks was a ghost.

they went out for breakfast, and raph saw a turtle yokai he couldnt help but chase to the elevator who said her name was jennika, but she really wouldnt look him in the eye. and then they all discussed whether shredder had another experiment done before they existed.

questioning their origins, donnie and mikey scout the pool for recon as leo and raph come back from their joint therapy session with big mama.

--

The elevator door opened and they stepped out into the pool area. It seemed to be a rooftop pool, but the elevator had felt like it was going down. The view was the highest they’d seen, and yet the air was warmer than it had been in their room. And there was no wind, unlike their room.

They looked around and spotted their brothers, Donnie was sitting on the edge of the pool with his feet in, looking at his phone, while Mikey was doing laps.

Leo grabbed Raph’s arm and the two of them wandered over.

“Hey guys.” He said. “How’s the mission going?”

Donnie looked up and looked around. “No other turtles spotted here.”

Mikey jumped out of the water with a splash. “Yeah, just old people really. I don’t think they liked us.”

“You were doing cannonballs, that's why.”

Raph wandered over to the edge of the roof, resting his hands on the railing and staring out at the city. It was so high. Higher than fathers tower was. In fact he could see Foot Tower in the distance, dwarfed by this view.

He was above it. He was beyond it. But god were they ever high.

He felt Leo walk up behind him. “I hate this view.”

He sighed and nodded. “I’m surprised I don’t feel sick. I hate heights.”

He felt him step beside him and press his shoulder against his. “I know what you mean… it’s like it’s not a real height. There’s none of that wind whipping in your face. Like a big realistic dome with a view.”

Raph nodded, squinting out at the view. “The feeling of the window was freezing.. like ice. And here there’s no wind at all.”

“Me and Slash got Big Mama to tell us there’s some kind of cross dimensional portals between the floors.. that there’s protection magic around the floors. I wonder if something broke the one by our window.”

Raph tapped his fingers against the railing.

“Maybe…”

“You okay..?”

He looked up at him nervously.

“I’m… scared, honestly.. and I’m not sure why.”

Leo smiled down at him. “We’re gonna be okay. We got this, partner.” He held out his fist for a bump.

Raph ignored it to give him a tight hug.

Leo rubbed his back lightly and looked back over at the twins.

“Should we get the raisins out of here? Or do you want more recon?”

Raph sighed and let go. “I think I’d like to stay out of the room for a while. Try and relax.”

“Didn’t bring a bathing suit. Mikeys got those shorts, but you’re wearing jeans.”

Raph shook his head and looked around at what other yokai were wearing. Some were in bathing suits, others looked more naked from what he could tell.

He wasn’t sure if he was comfortable being naked though, shell or not.

“Maybe I’ll just sit.” He said as he spotted a lounge chair to the side.

Leo walked past him to go talk to the twins again and he watched them. He felt like a mom again. Out with her kids. At least he didn’t look like Splinter this time. Bathrobe and all.

It was about noon and the sun was shining, so it was getting busier the longer they stayed out here. But he just sat in the warm sun and let himself feel calm, he watched Mikey try and splash Donnie to coax him in, watched Leo strip down to his sweatpants to wrestle with their baby brother in the pool.

At some point Donnie wandered over to hand him his electronics and he smiled at him.

“You wanna get in?” Raph asked him, surprised.

He shrugged. “Might as well live in the moment for once. It is a nice day, and we’re not too weird here.”

“You want me to help you with your braces?”

“Nah, I’ll need them. I don’t care if they get wet.” He pulled his hoodie off and Raph stared at him. He never went anywhere without something on his chest.

He was surprised how weird it felt to see him like that in public. Donnie was somewhat round like Raph, but had more masculine features, for a turtle. But no muscle definition. Even in the cage he’d been wearing his hoodie. But he was feeling more free right now. Maybe this place was good for them.

Donnie pointed at his phone and headphones.

“If you don’t wanna join, you can like... Read or listen to music. There’s free wifi here.”

Raph hummed and put the headphones on.

“Thanks Donnie…”

He shrugged and made his way into the pool to try doing laps. Which for him was holding the edge the whole time.

Raph eyed the phone and looked through his music. Not much he recognized. He found Queen though, and decided to play that and close his eyes. Letting himself be a turtle basking in the sunlight for about 20 minutes.

He sensed someone sit near him and opened his eyes.

A tall furry lion Yokai was in his sunlight, looking down at him.

And suddenly he felt uncomfortable.

They seemed to be talking to him so he pulled the headphones off.

“Huh?”

“I said kinda a weird look for the pool. The jeans.”

Raph looked down at himself and back up.

“Yeah. Wasn’t planning on coming to the pool.”

He gestured over to his brothers with his head.

“Those your kids?”

Raph furrowed his brows and looked over at his brothers. They seemed to be having fun splashing each other.

“Kinda, yeah?”

“Huh. That one your… husband?”

Raph felt his face flush as he looked over at Leo.

“No, that’s my brother.”

He raised his brows and smirked. “So you’re a single mom?”

‘Female female female!’

His body felt cold despite the heat from the sun.

“Sorry, bet they dragged you out here without a bathing suit. Shame, you look like you’ve got a good figure…”

‘You’re going to get assaulted again!’

His heart was pounding in his chest. He looked in Leo’s direction desperately, needing someone to help him.

“Hey kid.” A deep familiar voice behind him said as he felt a hand on his shoulder.

The lion looked over him nervously.

Raph watched as the backside of a tall muscular turtle stepped into view, shielding him from the Lion’s gaze. They were wearing flowery swim trunks.

“That’s my son you’re talking to. He’s 17. Do I need to call security?” The voice said angrily. “Or are you gonna fuck off?”

Raph tried to quiet his beating heart. He felt like he might throw up. He felt like Slash might jump out.

And yet… This turtle made him feel safe.

“U-uh no problem man! My bad!” The lion quickly rose up and left. And the turtle took the chair and sat down beside him.

Raph looked at him nervously.

Broad shouldered and maybe 30 years old, his skin was a dull light green, his plastron wide and pointier than Raph had ever seen. Thick legs and strong arms. He looked tired but smiled warmly at him with wide, kind eyes.

“Are you okay?”

Raph stared at him nervously, pressing his hand to his chest.

“I-I might be having a panic attack…” he said softly.

The turtle reached out to offer his hand.

“You want me to count for breathing?”

Raph nodded quickly, taking his hand.

“In one two three four… out one two three four...”

He closed his eyes and followed the turtle's instructions. After a few minutes he felt okay again and stared down at the hand in his.

Two fingers. Their hands were so similar, but his were much larger.

He looked up at his face. He’d seen those eyes.

In the dark.

“It’s.. it’s you.”

He grunted softly in affirmation.

“You keep trying to get into trouble.”

Raph stared at him hard. He wanted to look away but he was terrified the man would disappear.

“What.. What's your name?”

“Kirby.”

“W-why are you following me? Why were you…”

“I just said you keep getting into trouble.”

Raph felt his eyes water as he stared at him.

“I-I’m not trying to, I thought I could just… be out in public, but I guess I’m too much of a s-slut…”

Kirby winced and leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees and holding Raph's hand in both of his, staring at him so kindly.

“You’re not. People always want to take advantage of you. I’m sorry, it’s not fair.”

“W-why do you know that..? W-who are you..?”

He shook his head. “Just someone who cares.”

“D-do you know Jennika..?”

He laughed. A familiar laugh. “Yeah. We know each other.”

“Why… why did she cry when she looked at me?”

He shrugged. “She’s got complicated feelings. Hard to explain.”

“I-I’m not scared of you. I should be, I don’t know you…”

“You kinda know me though.” He said, a weird glint in his eye.

Raph grunted and stared at him frustrated. “Why are you so vague and annoying?”

He laughed and shook his head. “I don’t know. Ah. Leo’s noticed. You should be fine now.” He pulled away from his grasped hand.

“Hey!” They heard Leo yell from the edge of the pool.

Raph didn’t turn. He watched Kirby bolt up and give him a salute before disappearing into the crowd, he presumed to the elevator.

Raph just stared blankly at the space he’d been.

Leo sat in front of him, dripping wet and waving his hand in front of his face.

“Are you okay?! Did he hurt you?!”

Raph looked up at him and shook his head slowly. “No… h-he… uh, saved me..? There was.. a guy trying to…” he closed his eyes and winced. “He saved me.” He looked back at Leo, who looked worried.

“What did he say? Did you get anything out of him?”

Raph rolled onto his back and stared at the pool.

“His name’s Kirby. He says I keep getting into trouble. He pretended he was my dad to make a guy leave… I.. I felt really safe.”

Leo groaned and lay back on the chair. “What the hell is going on…?”

“I-I didn’t want him to leave..” he whispered and held himself. His heart hurt.

Leo looked at him sadly. “Raph..?”

“I-I knew him… h-he said I knew him…”

Leo frowned and rubbed his neck. “Maybe it’s like.. You said he pretended to be your dad. Maybe it’s not pretend. Maybe he’s our real dad. Maybe he’s our dad, and Jennika’s our mom and that’s where we really came from.”

Raph looked up at him. “Jennika wasn’t female… she.. she had a plastron like you, not me. Her tail was long. A-and dad.. dad was so clear our human stuff is his… They couldn’t have made us.”

He sighed. “Let’s just imagine we get to come from somewhere better though, yeah..?”

He looked up at him sadly and nodded.

“O-okay…”

“Do you want to go back to the room..? Cuz we can go…”

He looked over at the twins and saw they were just splashing each other. It looked fun.

“I.. I wanna join, but…” he looked down at himself. He couldn’t swim in these jeans. It was naked or nothing. And he couldn’t do naked.

Leo smiled and bumped his shoulder.

“Trade pants. These are fine.”

Raph blinked and shook his head.

“Then you’ll be in wet jeans…”

“Eh, it’ll dry.” He picked up a rolled towel from a rack nearby and held it up in front of Raph as a privacy barrier.

“C'mon, you go have fun for a minute.”

He groaned and relented, unzipping his jeans and pulling them off. Leo dropped the towel on his lap for privacy and quickly undid his wet sweatpants and passed them to him. Raph put them on, they were a little snug and too long but it was stretchier than the jeans. Leo put the jeans on and smiled.

“See? Easy. I’ll watch the stuff, you go swim.”

Raph eyed him nervously and unzipped his hoodie.

He wondered if Yokai had weird gender rules even without nipples.

He tried not to let it bother him, Leo was being nice and it would be a waste to make him do all that and then just chicken out.

He tossed the hoodie on the pile and decided to jump in.

He let himself float on his stomach for a while, feeling the refreshing water and the sun on his back. He probably looked like a corpse.

He felt someone jump on him and whipped around, seeing Mikey had decided to clamber on his back.

“Raph’s here!” He cheered and hugged him.

Raph laughed a little and shoved him off. “Careful, I’m not that strong a swimmer.”

He looked around. Leo waved at him from the lounge chair.

Someone splashed him and he turned, seeing Donnie holding on to the side of the pool.

Raph beamed. “Oh? We’re doing a splash off now?”

Donnie yelped and started swimming away.

Raph laughed and chased after him, Mikey was cheering from the center of the pool.

“You can escape Donnie! Kick those legs!”

Raph caught up and waved his arm at him, causing a big splash to hit him in the face.

“Nooooo!” He cried dramatically and pretended to sink.

Raph laughed and dove under water, grabbing him around his middle and standing up straight in the shallow end to carry him over his shoulder.

“I caught you!”

Donnie shrieked and laughed, pounding on the back of his shell. “Stoooop!”

“I’ll save you!” Mikey rammed into Raph who dramatically threw Donnie into the deep end.”

And then Donnie didn’t come back up for too long.

“Shit.” Raph dove down and saw him sinking, he grabbed his arm and swam up, dragging him back to the shallow end of the pool and stood holding him up.

He was sputtering and struggling to breathe.

Raph held him against his chest and climbed out of the pool with him and patted him on his back.

“Cough it up, you’re okay.” Raph tried. He was trying not to freak out and placed him on the ground to sit.

He was still wheezing

Someone touched his shoulder and he turned to see a sweet turtle face smiling sadly at him. “I can help.” She said as she pushed him out of the way and waved her hand in front of Donnie’s chest.

She was gaunt. Her arms and knees were wrapped in some kind of bandages, and she was wearing a strange one piece swimsuit on top that fit around her shell. The shell looked too big for her body, slightly off center.

She waved her two fingered hand from chest up to his nose, and a floating bubble of water came out of Donnie’s mouth and then dissipated on the ground.

Donnie stared at her in awe. “W-water bending?” He was panting and taking croaky breaths.

She laughed a little and smiled, confused.

“I don’t know what that means. Simple magic. Are you okay?”

Donnie was clapping himself on the plastron, trying to breathe without croaking. She rubbed his shoulder.

Raph looked between them. Their skin was the same deep blue green. She looked like she could be his older sister.

“I-I think I’m okay…” he glared up at Raph. “Why would you throw me in the deep end?!”

He kept staring at the woman.

She turned to look at him and gave him a sad smile. “His knees aren’t strong enough to keep himself afloat. Maybe with some practice.”

He kept staring at her. She was his height, and much thinner. But she had the same flat plastron and short tail.

“…how do you know that?” He asked.

She laughed sadly and looked down at her own limbs. “Experience.”

Raph looked down and realized that her feet weren’t actually on the ground. She was hovering 2 inches above it.

Donnie seemed to follow his gaze and his eyes went wide.

“Are.. you the ghost?” He asked quietly.

She turned to look down at him and rolled her eyes. “Do I look like a ghost? I’m quite corporeal.”

Donnie looked up at her frustratedly. “You know what I’m talking about.”

She tapped her chin in thought. “Do I?”

He groaned.

Raph put his hand on her arm gently.

“I.. I know you…” he said quietly.

She turned to look back at him with sad eyes.

“We’ve never met. I’m Venus.”

“I’ve… never met another female turtle…” he couldn’t help but say.

She tilted her head sadly. “No.. I guess you haven’t.”

“I-I’m sorry…” he said suddenly.

He didn’t know why he was sorry.

She laughed a little. “You don’t have to be sorry, it’s not bad to be female.” Then her eyes got sad. “But I guess that’s to be expected…”

Donnie shot up and stepped between them.

“How are you floating? Is that like something you were born with or can you learn? Does it help with weight distribution? Is that why you do it? If I could do that I bet it would help. Oh but then you wouldn’t be exercising your knees…”

She blinked and sighed playfully, placing a hand on her hip. “You are too inquisitive.”

Raph stared between them. They had the same snout. The same smug look on their faces.

“Venus…” he said softly.

She turned to look at him. She saw something in his eye and winced, looking away.

“Anyway, I’m glad you’re okay, kid. Don’t go swimming where you can’t stand up, and keep a brother with you at all times in the water!” She saluted and seemed to float away.

Raph wanted to chase her but he just… let her go.

Donnie groaned and looked at him funny. “She could have taught me magic! Bones don’t hurt magic!”

Raph looked down at him sadly, he knew there were tears in his eyes and Donnie’s expression confirmed it.

“Raph what’s wrong..?”

“Sh-she looked just like you…”

He scoffed and folded his arms. “Hardly. She was thin and agile.”

He shook his head and reached out to touch Donnie’s snout. “She had your snout.. your skin.”

Donnie was looking more nervous as Raph looked at him. He pushed Raph’s hand off him. “She can’t have been my mother. Shredder would have seen her as useless damaged goods. Maybe there’s just.. turtle yokai out there who come in such variety that she somewhat looked like me.”

Raph rubbed his arm. He was right, if she was chronically in pain like Donnie, and small and female like Raph… she would have been dead to their father.

“You’re not sure though…” Raph said. Donnie was making a face.

He sighed. “Hereditary illnesses are a thing, I suppose. But I don’t think she was old enough… unless she was… you know, younger than us when it happened.”

“Which Shredder would never have done, obviously..” Raph rolled his eyes and hugged his arms, turning away.

“Sorry…” Donnie mumbled.

He sighed and looked over. “I’m sorry I threw you in the deep end, I wasn’t thinking about that. I was thinking ��don’t let him crack his head’ more than I was thinking ‘he needs to hold on to the edge to stay up’.”

Donnie shrugged and leaned against him. “I get it. We’re not used to pools and stuff. Thanks for jumping in after me.”

Raph smiled and rubbed his back. “I mean it would be shitty of me to let you drown don’t you think?”

Donnie grunted and nodded. “Extremely shitty cuz it would have been your fault yeah. Still. Thank you.”

“Are you as done with pool time as I am?”

“Yeeees..” He whined. “Need to recharge.”

Raph laughed and nodded, giving his head a kiss. “Okay.”

They wandered back over to Leo and towelled themselves off, Leo stared up at them questioningly. “How did the recon go? I hope that was what the FAKE drowning was?”

Donnie rolled his eyes as he was letting Raph rub his back dry so he could put his hoodie back on.

“Unfortunately that was a real almost drowning. I am fine, thank you for asking.”

Leo winced and stood up. “Shit, sorry. Are you okay?”

“Fine. She literally water bended the pool water out of my throat. And she was FLOATING! Did you see that?” He couldn’t contain his excitement.

Raph pat his shoulder and decided he should collect Mikey while Donnie got him up to speed.

He turned to the pool and didn’t see him.

Mama turtle went in overdrive.

“Mikey?” He called out, darting between people in the crowd.

The more he looked the more worried he got.

‘Idiot, you almost kill ONE brother and LOSE the other?’

He groaned and smacked his head. “Shut up Slash.”

That was new but he couldn’t blame him.

He did a lap around the pool and saw the backside of a turtle behind the bar to the side. He rushed over and realized this turtle was bigger than him.

“Jennika.” He breathed.

She turned in surprise and he could see Mikey behind her, smiling up at him.

“Oh, hi Raph!”

He whimpered and rushed forward, ignoring her to grab him around his shoulders.

“Where did you go! I was worried!”

He grabbed his arms and pushed him back.

“I’m fine! I made a friend, see?” He held his hand out to Jennika, who was standing awkwardly beside them. She was wearing a big white t shirt and baggy trunks.

“Sorry, you… guys were distracted and I wanted to make sure he was safe somewhere…” she barely looked at him.

That hurt for some reason.

“Thanks…” he stood back up, keeping his hand on Mikey’s shoulder to make sure he knew where he was. “I.. sorry, I shouldn’t.. assume things but. You’re… not female like me, are you..?”

She blinked and shook her head. “Uh… no. I used to be… sad. About that.”

A new emotion came over him and he gave her a look of awe.

“Are you… trans..?”

She gave him a surprised look. “Is that… okay?”

Raph could feel his eyes water but he smiled big. “I… I’ve never met a.. I mean, you’re a turtle like me, and you’re.. trans too! A-and that.. makes me happy, I-I don’t know.. sorry, I’m not… not trying to be weird.”

She smiled and shook her head, her eyes were wet too.

“No, it’s not weird, I really get it…” she rubbed her arm. “I didn’t know uh…” she coughed and shook her head. “No, I guess I’d always hoped you were. I didn’t understand myself.”

Raph was confused by her words but kept smiling at her.

“You’re beautiful.” He told her. He didn’t know why he felt the need to tell her that. It was overwhelming seeing someone like him out in the world.

She stared at him with a shocked smile. Tears were rolling down her cheeks.

“O-oh…” she sniffed and then laughed, rubbing her eyes. “F-fuck, can I hug you? Th-this is a lot but..”

Raph reached in instantly to wrap his arms around her. He just wanted to make her feel as happy as he felt seeing her. She was taller than him and thicker up top, but she was just a beautiful turtle girl to him.

She seemed to be crying above him as she held him back.

Mikey wandered over and smiled up at her. “See, she’s a friend Raph!”

The two of them parted and Jennika got down on her knee to idly punch his shoulder.

“You’re a good judge of character, but you still shouldn’t run off with people. Not here. There’s bad guys here. Only trust turtles, got that little man?”

He made a determined face and nodded. “Got it.”

Jennika then leaned in to hug Mikey. It looked like a bone crushing hug. Mikey just took it and tried to hug her back just as strongly.

Raph looked between them. They looked.. so similar. She looked like if Mikey had been well loved as a child and grown up strong.

The idea was making him cry again.

“Jennika!” They heard a voice call out.

Raph looked over and saw Kirby again. He was standing by the elevator and waving her over, he looked frustrated to see Raph again, and maybe a little sad.

Jennika looked up and wiped her eyes. “Shit. That’s my brother, he’s gonna give me a talking to…” She muttered slightly annoyed.

Raphs eyes snapped up at her. “Kirby’s your brother?”

She winced and rubbed her neck. “Uh, it’s been nice talking!”

She shuffled away.

Raph was shaking suddenly.

“W-wait!” He started to run but they both looked at him inside the elevator with a sorrowful look and then disappeared.

And he dropped to his knees.

Mikey put his hands on his shoulders. “Raph? What’s wrong? Is it the voices again?”

But his head was silent, save for a ringing in his ears. He stared at the elevator blankly. It opened again and they weren’t there anymore.

He wasn’t sure how long he was staring, he knew Donnie and Leo had wandered up holding all of their stuff, and it took the three of them to lift him off the ground.

“What happened, Raph?” Leo asked gently as they walked his body towards the elevator.

He just stared inside. He hoped to god they’d just reappear and let him ask the burning question on his mind.

He couldn’t say this out loud until he knew.

The elevator door closed and it was just him and his brothers again.

‘You’re right.’

He whipped his head around to look, but realized the voice was Slash again.

“W-what do you mean I’m right?!”

His brothers looked at him funny but he paid them no mind.

‘You know who they are. And you’re right. Big Mama told me the first time you let me out, she wasn’t gonna crush the eggs. She said we’d never see them again. She lied.’

“B-but that makes no sense Slash! Th-they’re too old! I-it’s been a week!”

‘I don’t know. But you know that’s who they are.’

Raph slammed his head against the wall and shook it hard.

“N-no!”

Leo grabbed his shoulder and looked him in the eye. “Raph. Talk to me. What happened?”

Raph looked around the elevator in a panic. Mikey and Donnie looked scared of him, scared of what was happening.

“I-I… not here… I-in the room..”

He didn’t want anyone's secret eyes on him right now. He couldn’t trust Big Mama. Leo was right. Why had they bothered to talk to her at all today? They were better off on their own!

The door opened on their floor and they quickly rushed back inside their freshly cleaned room. Raph checked every room, every cranny. The windows were closed and no one was hiding in the corners.

After his panicked rushing he sat on the freshly cleaned sofa and tried to calm his breathing.

His brothers all stood in front of him in the conversation pit. None of them wanted him out of sight.

“Raph.” Leo said sternly. He looked up and saw them all staring at him with worried eyes.

He looked between them. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. “It won’t make sense. But nothing here does. There’s.. magic and portals and dimensional travel…”

“At this point no theory is too out there.” Donnie said.

He opened his eyes and looked at them all seriously.

“They’re our kids.”

[ganondoodle]

since seeing a post from a mutual yesterday i was thinking about how grateful i am that i can now, confidently say something like -im taking demise away from nintendo- or -hes MY character now- while knowing that the people following me will understand that thats not actually possible and also i dont mean that literally literally (duh)

bc (while i have mentioned it in the past and im not trying to fish for sympathy with this, the memories ... and trauma really does come back every now and then) there were people once that imagined i said that about a popular character in the fandom i was in when i was a teen and proceeded to try (and nearly succeeding bc i was already struggeling alot with depression, anxiety and undiagnosed autism) to bully me into killing myself; perhaps it wasnt their actual goal, but the shit they did (alot of them were adults too), was absolutely insane, but i've only been able to see that wayyyy after the fact

like even if im remembering wrong and i did word it wrong or weird or in a way that was easily misunderstood, i was a teen, with english not as my first language and it still was some fandom shit that ultimately did not matter and never in any scenario warrented that level of harrassment, i dont even think i ever told my parents bc i thought i had to deal with it alone since i 'caused' it too and since then just ... wanting to forget it ever happened

while i am much, much better now, and slowly learning to manage my mental health struggles too, i do wonder just .. how much of how i am today was shaped by that horrible experience, like the way i overly try to pre-apologize and put doubts on every thought i write out, or the panic i feel when something does go outside my usual range (mostly twitter really ..) was immensely worsened by that .. among stuff i probably dont even realize

funnily enough, i made my account on tumblr to try and flee from all that was happening to me (even if they did stalk me at first .. even here) and hey, im still here :D

i guess what im trying to say is, i am very happy to still be here, i am grateful to be able to be myself, even with its downsides, even with my problems, even if the things i do are passable at best, even if i will never "make it big", even if i am annoying at times, even if i do mistakes still, even if i am .... horribly bad at replying to the awesome people that message me-

there are, at least a few people, who enjoy, or even care, or heck, even think about what i draw and write, which is .. still mind boggling to me and i might never be able to truly believe its all real, there are people who are able to see beyond my flaws, forgive me if i do missstep or overreact, and just be aware that even with everything i share about me, there is lots you dont know that may inform why i feel a certain way about something, but thats okay, i am human, i am here, there are people who enjoy my brainworms, and perhaps even think i, as a person, am nice

i am so grateful for that

some things are good

[gamblersdoll]

pussydrunk

in which, Gojo, would confess. MDNI- 18+, oral (fem receiving), head squeezing, mean and angry Gojo, whimpering Gojo, fingering, unprotected intercourse, est relationship?? angst, then fluff

Love was a tragic curse, at least thats what Gojo thought. Gojo believed love wasnt needed in a relationship. no, never.

until you and him started dating, you would always talk about the mysteries of love, and gojo would always ignore it. that stupid, yet attractive smirk plastered on his face. you two started dating for a while, going onto five months, and it was starting to get rocky.

fighting with gojo was like fighting with a wall that was freshly built, one that wouldnt be knocked down. youd grow angry, and gojo would just ignore your anger, your own pain. you two were arguing about head, how youd always go down on him and please him. however, the energy was never matched.

"i just dont give head, y/n." he said with a lazy smirk, peering over his damn glasses. "i dont see why its a big deal, we could just not give head." he suggested, knowing itd piss her off.

"or we could stop fucking all together.." she sneered, folding her arms. she looked to her side, not wanting to look at his stupid , yet, attractive face.

this caught his attention, him frowning and forming a pout. "wait jus a minute, we dont have to go that far." he protested, rolling his eyes.

if you had told gojo's younger self, maybe when he was 22, that here he was, between a girls legs and eating her pussy, hed laugh at you.

"fuck.. you taste so fucking good.." he said, legs thrown over his shoulders as you were devoured by him, "cant believe id pass this sloppy pussy up.. you cream so much when i eat you.." you moaned, gripping at the hair on his head. you were so close, you were grinding on his face, begging for his tongue to quicken. "cum, cum f'me, cmon, cmon!" he encouraged, shoving his fingers in your cunny, feeling the way you convulsed, how you spasamed, how you arched your back and then--

the feeling of his face being splashed against, him pulling away to the mess you created.

"...you just squirted on me." he revealed, still realizing your mess, how heavy you breathed, how fucking pretty your pussy looks. you eventually looked at him, his eyes wide, youd think hes angry.

"im sorr-" you attempted to say, before you felt his two thick digits in your pussy grind against your gummy walls.

"yer gunna do it again, until i say so.." he commanded, you didnt have any choice, not when hes pussydrunk.

"what the fuck do you mean, you dont love me??" you questioned, standing infront of him, folding your arms. you were more than pissed, and incredibly hurt.

"when did i ever say that i did??" he chuckled, hands in his pockets- this motherfucker didnt care, it was beyond him. he quite honestly didnt see the reason you cared, he just wanted you to finish dinner already, its been a long day.

"the shit i do for you, that doesnt mean anything..? the fact i basically have to save your ass sometimes???" you pestered, stirring the pot of the stew. you were growing pissed. the violent pissed, the pissed that you worked so hard to tame, the pissed only for special grades or hardass curses.

"oh no it does and i appreciate it, i always show that, i just dont feel love for you, if i did then that would be bad." he shrugged, "hows dinner coming along?"

youre worried about the stability of your relationship, and hes worried about food. what was his fucking problem??

you slammed the pot into the sink, emptying the contents of what once was dinner, you could go a night without your cooking... he couldnt.

"figure it out, im not doing shit for a man who doesnt give a fuck about me." you spat, walking to your shared bedroom, leaving gojo confused.

he didnt care, you can throw your little tantrum.

until, of course, youd change your social media relationship status to "its complicated" instead of "in a relationship." and once gojo got that message, oh how livid he was.

"what the fuck." he spat at you, gripping your arm as he glared into your eyes. the way his blue pierced into your brown, you would almost be scared , but you werent.

"isnt it complicated? you dont love me and we're in a weird position, so its consider complicated." you chuckled, trying to reciprocate the same energy he had just a week ago. what was his problem?

"youre a fucking brat, yknow? you stopped cooking, you stopped looking at me, you stopped everything." he snarled, leaning his face into yours. why did he care? what did you matter. you were just another girl who he dated, who he lived with, who he fucked, who he ate with, who he actually put effort in his appearance, who he actually give a full kiss, who he made love to-

"youre mine, princess- ohoh fuckk.." he groaned, plowing his fat dick into your pussy, his face in the crook of your neck, humping into you, eyes tightly shut. hearing you moan his name, he moaned yours back. "fuck youre so pretty.. my pretty bitch. oh fuck- fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck..ohmygod fuckkkk..." he whined, hands entwined into yours and spilling into your womb, while he whimpered.. he fucking whimpered, if you didnt cum from then, you surely did now. he wasnt his nonverbal, non noise making self. he let loose for a change, and all it took was for you to take a week trip with collegues.

oh, fuck.

he rolled his eyes hard, sighing while he looked away in defeat, his efforts in not falling in love, failed. just to realize it wasnt the kind of love he felt for geto, wasnt the kind of love at all. and all it took was you to pull away slightly, he put his head on your shoulder, sighing heavily.

"you were right.." he mumbled, holding you tightly. "i.. do love you." he whispered, feeling nervous to say, he couldve costed a good relationship.

"hm." she said, shaking her head and holding him back, "you wan'a kiss?" she asked, she didnt miss the way he perked up. "then say it again, and you can have as many kisses you want." she chuckled.

"love you," he said, trying to kiss her. she dodged it, moving her head to the side , drawing out a groan from his throat. "whaaattt?" he groaned.

"say it right, dont get lazy again." she warned, her own smirk on her face, something he always went feral for, whether she got it from him or he just found it really fucking hot on her face, the way the plump of her lips spread slightly, especially with that damn pina colada lip gloss on-

"i love you, princess. now can i please fucking kiss you?" he almost growled, not waiting for her answer, just smashing his lips against hers.

[3liza]

Do you think humanising the Borg from I Borg onwards was a good move or should they have stayed as the monolithic legion they started as?

readers please take note this is the level of discourse i want to see in my ask box from now on

its been a long time since I saw any borg episodes first hand so im probably forgetting some stuff but heres what i think. as cunt as the borg queen is (and i truly love her...this actress was so good in Silent Hill too), no serious science fictioneur is going to say the borg concept was made stronger by the retconning of the borg collective to be even vaguely individualistic. the reason the borg were so terrifying when they were introduced is solely due to their gestalt nature. there shouldnt be specialized borg (well not beyond insect specialization) or individual borg or even a fathomable borg "mind". I, Borg is a classic episode because it does what TNG and DS9 do best, which is to reexamine the assumptions and prejudices of Starfleet (which are the assumptions and prejudices of the primarily american, 20th-21st century star trek audience) and wrestle with ethics in a vacuum (lol) vs material reality, and really the existence of the Locutus arc already exploded the borg collective concept in a dumb way (as cool as Locutus is) so at that point it was already sort of moot.

i think there are a lot of better ways to handle "borg separated from collective" as a concept than what was done with Seven of Nine, Hugh, the Borg Queen and Locutus respectively, and i think there were better ways to advance the Borg concept for future iterations and to elevate their design and level of threat for narrative reasons. there are so many good examples of both collective lifeforms and parasitism just on Earth that the writers could have drawn from, but the Star Trek writers are rarely allowed to write actual science fiction, and when they get close, the producers always step in to make them dumb everything down for an audience that, imo, doesnt really need things dumbed down for them.

what the star trek producers get wrong (and what all TV producers get wrong) is that the technobabble on shows like this can be scientifically accurate or at least theoretically accurate and the audience members who are not interested in that sort of thing will regard it exactly the same as if the technobabble is bullshit, but the nerds and intellectuals who are watching will be thrilled! dumbing things down is pointless, no one who needs things dumbed down is paying that much attention anyway, they dont care if things make sense or not. a correct explanation of space travel and physics sounds exactly the same to them as one that's just mad libbed together from buzzwords. catering to them is meaningless. but being smart with it and letting the science nerds on staff actually write accurately will in the end make a better show.

i know there are some scenes showing borg infants in the show but im not sure they ever explain it, borg "queens" and "drones" responsible for reproduction would have been a no brainer. you could work a semi-individualistic plotline in with the crew running into a small shuttle or pod-type craft that just had one pregnant queen onboard or a queen and some drones who were looking for somewhere to start a new colony. i think showing borg near the end of their working lives as basically decaying, animate corpses would have been both scary and lore-supported, as would an "ant graveyard" type scene, but that may have been too much for 90s censors. parasitic lifeforms on earth usually have powerful immunosuppressant hormones to prevent the host bodies from rejecting them, i think this is probably mentioned in TNG and handwaved at some point but it would be a really big deal, medically, for rehabbing an individual borg like Seven or Locutus or Hugh.

[thetoaddaddy]

I dont think i ever really explained why I like the idea of Jiraiya living a more troubled/neglected childhood. Honestly I just like the juxtaposition of the rich girl from the most influential family, the tragic orphan full of resentment, and the white trash hick from the slums.

Have I hooked you? Long sorta in this essay I will type of explanation of my reasoning post. Trimmed so you don’t have to suffer through scrolling a big long post unless you volunteer to it. And I welcome reblogs with your own thoughts added to it or comments. I like having these kinds of discussions.

It makes for a fun dynamic and puts together three very different social classes that make up the Sannin and the most common 3 classes of society. Tsunade has everything from money, social status and livin in the rich how dare the neighbours put up an extra twinkle light we’re contacting the police neighbourhood. Orochimaru lost his family but lives fairly okay being a ward of the Hokage/state plus as a genius kid with potential to end the war with his big fucken brain and lack of empathy he would most likely be treated more special. Jiraiya hiding his money in the floorboards of his room cuz he knows his parents will steal it to buy into their addictions and he’s well aware no one really expects him to be nothing more than a failure.

Plus we don’t have any characters who have a troubled relationship with their parents in this way. Yeah we got dead parents and asshole cold distant rich clan expectations parent tropes. But not too much on poor and abusive. Which is weird cuz its pretty common to be low income with some garbage parents. (Not to say that’s the case all the time of course) Nor do we see much for alcoholism or similar addictions just ruining a family. The most he ever speaks about his parents in canon is that they were civilians. Kinda cold imo. Like I get that most likely kishi figured no one cares that much from where Jiraiya came from but that throw away line had me thinking and this headcanon came out.

So it’s pretty poetic that Jiraiya grew up full Glass Castle from a nothing neglectful civilian family and made something of himself with his own determination rather than being crutched with clan powers or high blood relations. He’s a nobody who proved people wrong and grew beyond his upbringing. His life we see on screen has always been pretty born under an unlucky star/he had to claw his way for anything he’s wanted and nothing was ever given to him. So it makes sense to me anyways that his early life was just as claw his way out from falling off the face of the earth. He could have just picked the easy way and not rise above being some drunk gutter rat that is just a direct product of his upbringing. But he focused on trying to get out rather than keep the cycle going. He picked the academy and proved he was not just above the curve but the grit he already had from surviving his broken home made for a determined courageous motherfucker. With that he became rich and renowned. All on his own.

I think that gives him more interesting motivation than the canon basically being ‘on my quest for pussy brb🏃‍♂️’ Like damn can we please uncreepy him kishi i stg. And I like to ignore his railroaded prophecy ass I must find my destiny stuff. That ruins his accomplishments. Honestly as a fairly empathetic person who grew up poor and hungry why wouldn’t he take pity on three war orphans and try to do good by them where he was never given that comfort? It’s far more compelling and interesting story than some crazy old toad told me to do it and I took those words so fucking literally it led the rest of my life.

I like to imagine he’s simply more wayward and never felt satisfied staying put(especially with all the horrible memories Konoha gives him). It also makes more sense for him to have this kind of chip on his shoulder over being some average guy who had an average upbringing. He can handle himself not just in battles but in dealing with the more uncomfortable situations like traveling through poor areas with the know how.

Like he knows how to speak crackhead and the slum folk clock him as one of their own. I wouldn’t call it street cred or anything. He just has the street smarts beyond that of an average person and it shows. Plus in some verses I like to think he travels hoping to find love as well. Can’t find one’s soulmate staying put in a village can they? ;)

Not every character has to be tragic I know. And this is just what I think. You don’t have to agree with me or accept my interpretations. He could have easily just brushed off the subject cuz he keeps people at an arms length. Which he does for the most part.

But I feel like with the Sannin era we were left with such well cooked and seasoned snippets that it became kinda frustrating that the rest was kinda undercooked or plain still in the damn deep freeze. So we get brain zoomies and try to fill in the big ass gaps. I want to know how three of the most interesting and important ninja of the shinobi world grew up. It’s fun to imagine and make these types of interpretations. Even if it is answered one day in a mini series or a book, I’ll still probably prefer what I and my moots cooked up. Cuz honestly we put more care and deep thought into these characters than kishi does at this point 😭

[jarmes]

Homestuck: Beyond Canon Fanfic - Yiffy's Mother

The first thing Yiffy notices is that the woman standing before her looks like her mother. She has her long, messy dark hair, the big glasses, the protruding teeth, and the pointy white ears. Except, she’s young. Younger than Yiffy, maybe. And, the smell is wrong. She smells like dried blood. She hovers in the air, with eyes darker than the darkest night, and stares at Yiffy.

Yiffy growls.

Use your words, Yiffany.

the imposter says without moving her lips. Yiffy winces as the words appear in her brain, overriding her thoughts, keeping her from thinking about anything but the imposter’s command.

YIFFY: FUCK YOU

DAVE: oh shit boss i dont think doggy girl is happy to see you

The imposter’s retainers emerge from the shadows. To her left stands a troll with red wings, curved horns, and a massive smile. Something about her makes Yiffy afraid, more afraid than she’s ever been. To the imposter’s right is a metal man with red sunglasses, holding a sword. She recognizes him from the photos. Dave Strider, her mom’s husband, deceased for several years. He has no face, just the sunglasses, making it impossible to ascertain his emotion.

You’ve traveled far to reach us. Past the plot point, through the darkest reaches of space. Do you know why?

YIFFY: TO KILL YOU

That is what you think your purpose is. Unfortunately, this is the moment is pulled away and the wizard is revealed to be a man, a simple inventor who has controlled his kingdom through endless lies. Do you know why you want to kill me?

YIFFY: BECAUSE YOU KILLED MY FRIENDS

I did. But that is not why you are here. You are here because I have willed it.

YIFFY: FUCK YOU

You are repeating yourself.

Yiffy snarls at the demon wearing her mother’s face. She charges forward and lunges at the imposter. The retainers stop her. Yiffy freezes, midair, as the troll summons glowing hears. She can’t move, no matter how hard she tries. She feels like she’s choking as her lungs are locked in place by the power of a god.

Strider holds his sword up to Yiffy’s throat. With a single motion, he could kill her. If she wasn’t frozen, she would try and bite him.

DAVE: you need to get a cool sword

DAVE: or a shitty one i guess

DAVE: the point is you probably could have hit her with a bit more reach

DAVE: like wed all think you had failed and then you would say youre already dead and a bunch of blood would explode out like in a samurai film

Dave.

DAVE: plus it fits with the family bloodline and stuff

DAVE: youre my niece right

DAVE: nice to meet you

DAVE: i like the nostalgia critic outfit

Dave.

ARADIA: dave i think youre talking too much again

DAVE: yeah that happens

Strider sheathes his sword and the troll unfreezes time. Yiffy crashes down onto the floor in front of the imposter.

ARADIA: if its any consolation

ARADIA: death isnt really a big deal

ARADIA: lots of people die

ARADIA: weve all died

ARADIA: me and dave again and again

ARADIA: your friends are probably having the time of their lives!!!

Yiffy spits on the imposter’s leg. She doesn’t react.

You are not here to kill me. Because, of course, that could not happen unless I allowed it, and dying now would be inconvenient for my duties. You are here because I have allowed you to come here, my child.

YIFFY: YOU ARENT MY MOM

Correct. I am not Jade Harley, although I have been using her corpse as an outfit for many years. But, in many ways, I am more a parent to you than either of your mothers.

YIFFY: WHAT

My name is Calliope. Not the fearful murdered side character hiding in your grandmother’s basement, the better version. A version of Calliope who won. I created you, Yiffany. You would not exist if not for my intervention.

YIFFY: FUCK OFF

Let me tell you a story.

DAVE: yay storytime

Once, there was a group of children, who were ripped from their lives and forced to play a terrible game. The game broke them down, through pain and death, and rebirthed them as heroes. A terrible man, my brother, served as the ultimate boss of this game. Those heroes, rather than follow the path the game set before them, ran away to a paradise called Earth C. I became the shepherd of this Garden of Eden and watched as they lived happy lives. But, one of them, the Prince, was unsatisfied with happiness. He wanted the story to continue. And, to continue, it needed conflict. It needed a villain. A monster, a replacement for my brother. The Prince decided to be that become that villain. He escaped from Earth C so he could spread pain through existence. And, as the caretaker of a conflict-free world, it became my job to stop him.

YIFFY: WHAT THE FUCK DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING

The Prince is powerful. Almost as strong as me. He cannot be killed by conventional means. He is a metatextual being and can only be killed by a metatextual weapon. You, Yiffany, are my weapon.

YIFFY: WHAT

The Prince has complete control over his piece of existence. The only way to kill him is with something that should have never existed. A concept so ungodly stupid that, if he were to ever come into contact with it, he would cease to be.

To defeat my foe, I was forced to damage my paradise. I controlled the heroes like puppets, making them do things they would never do. I forced them to create my weapon. First, I had your surrogate and her wife adopt and raise a clone of Vriska. A deeply, deeply bad concept. But, unfortunately, not bad enough. Next, I created your friend Tavros. A child of rape, born from a hero twisted beyond recognition. A cowardly boy molested by a clown. Surely he would be enough! And yet, he was not potent enough. But with you, I created perfection. 

Yiffany Longstocking Lalonde-Harley. You should not exist. You are a living plothole who exists because I forced your mothers to abandon their values. The Prince fears you, Yiffany. He knows that you can kill him.

YIFFY: WHY DID YOU MAKE VRISSY AND TAV IF YOU WERE JUST GOING TO KILL THEM

They ceased to have any purpose in my plans. And, when I restored my paradise to how it should have been, they could not have been part of it. Better to get them out of the way now. Besides, their deaths made it easy to control you.

YIFFY: NOBODY CONTROLS ME

The Prince was smart. He removed himself from my domain as soon as my plans began. But, I managed to chase him here, to this land of abominations. And you, you worthless abomination, you heard my words in your head and chased them here. You have never made a choice in your entire life. You are a puppet, dragged around by the string, deluding herself into thinking she’s in control. It’s sad, really.

Yiffy lunges at Calliope, but she’s too slow. The Muse teleports to the other side of the room, completely fine. Yiffy crawls to her feet.

YIFFY: IF I CAN KILL DIRK

YIFFY: THEN I CAN KILL YOU TOO

Correct. Unfortunately, you will not get the chance.

YIFFY: ILL KILL STRIDER AND THE TROLL

YIFFY: MAKE YOU FEEL HOW I FELT WHEN YOU KILLED TAV AND VRISSY

Calliope laughs. I don’t need the time players to defeat you. I am more powerful than you could possibly imagine.

Yiffy charges at her. After a few steps, she trips, falling onto the hard stone floor. As she tries to stand up, she feels a sharp pain in her chest. A heart attack, from years of annoying anger anger. She gasps for air, but the pain is too strong for her to even take in a breathe. She looks up at me, at her true mother. She realizes that I am controlling this, just as I have controlled everything. She knows that her only chance to live is to bow. Tiffany crawls to her feet and lowers her head.

Good girl. Let’s go kill the Prince.

[acidsaladd]

i love it when fic writers sprinkle their hcs in a way that makes the characters feel Real and like they exist fully in their universe outside of what we see on screen

idk how to explain it but i have an example

in this one ninjago fic, kai and morro were lost (i think?) and chained together and kai had to let the others know hes okay without morro listening in, so he calls their base and says some random shit that turns out to be code for whatever. and like!! for ninjago specially i know the whole point of the show is that they r silly and goofy and we barely see them being like,,, actually capable and serious but i loooove when authors give them these extra bits that confirms the fact that they've been a team for so long and the do have ways in which they deal with shit like this (the fic is ignitus in ao3!!! i dont think i ever finished it but its rlly good go read it ninjago people)

a more recent example for rise. its generally agreed in the fandom that the turtles know asl and sometimes they add it sometimes they dont BUT!! this one fic goes beyond that and gave them signs for their names (donnies was a d being tapped to the forehead, mikeys was an m tapped to the heart, etc) which i had never seen in any other fic and!!!!!! like!!! they even gave april one and they explain how the turtles got to those signs. and its a small ish detail but it gives so much more context like. it makes it feel as though asl is an actual real part of their everyday lives and stuff!! (i talked abt this one recently its little kid with a big death wish on ao3!!! this one is so fucking good, i cried in 30 of 33 chapters istg)

END OF RAMBLE SORRY AUGH

[pumpkinrootbeer]

I am DYING to talk about Alastor. He’s absolutely my favorite, I love sassy little shits, especially when they’re otherwise the picture of manners.

I do think he made a deal with Lilith. They were gone for the same amount of time, he clearly isn’t at full power (wings clipped! Mouth sewn!!) and he at first didn’t seem to like Charlie at all. Sure, she’s powerful, but nobody knew that, especially not her. She annoyed him, but grew on him for sure and how he wants to protect her but can’t since he’s not able to summon his full power yet. Charlie may be able to get him out of his deal, or maybe he thinks she can use her relationship with her mom to convince her to let him go. Hence the favor!

My theory is Lilith asked him to watch over the hotel and possibly to kill Lucifer. She had to get into heaven somehow, and what better way than to betray the man she left Adam for? She sewed his mouth shut so that he couldn’t tell anyone and sent him to help build her daughter’s dream. Possibly also to sabotage it? Although we don’t see him doing this beyond the first episode. Husk clearly knows something, because when he comes back Al specifically turns to Husk in warning before turning to Charlie’s hug.

ANYWAY would love to hear your thoughts!!

I LOVE ALASTOR genuinely its really fun to see an ace character who isn't a robot, or emotionless, or comically innocent. super fun time for me specifically. also quick sidebar, how they went about showing his depth by him literally loosing it was so satisfying and works so well for his character. hazbin baby im so sorry i doubted your writing so onto the theories! i do 100% think lilith and alastor are connected, and i dont think it would be stretch to say she's the one who owns his soul. the reinforced detail of 7 years obviously is a big piece of evidence, along with his hate of lucifer, but her being in heaven reinforces it more for me honestly because of Zestial's line in episode 3 "Some hath spun wild tales of you falling to... holy arms?". imo its either lilith or a character we havent meant yet. (ive seen people throw eve's name around 🤔) now weather or not she wants him to protect charlie and/or the hotel is another matter. its gonna be pretty hard to predict what exactly the terms are and what she wants from him (if anything!) until we get more content. i dont think its really much of a stretch to come to that conclusion and im not not saying i believe it, but im not really sold on it. if it turns out canon i woudnt be surprised tho lol

him hanging around charlie could be her mom wants him to protect her, hence the annoyance he holds towards her at first, or it could be she has status! sure they dont know how strong she is but shes the princess of hell, and everyone respects that to some degree. her side is the winning side! (another side bar alastor actually truly believing in her makes me so so emotionally ill 😭 like he didnt doubt shed be able to rally people. and he lowkey encouraged her with his little shit talk pep talk. mi amor... babito....)

the stitches across his mouth, the way he dances around his 7 year absence, the way he completely switches up with husk when his deal is mentioned could all be unrelated but hazbin doesn't exactly do coincidences. the details are all very purposeful, ever since the pilot, so i do think he cant talk about it.

i also am inclined to believe that he didnt make the deal for his power and the deal is actively restricting it. for one, its more interesting imo. two, the line "once i figure out how to unclip my wings, then i'll be pulling all the strings" he clearly thinks he'll be stronger out of the deal, which sure, could be his arrogance. or the reason why hes so arrogant is because he used to be able to back up his talk 100%. i mean the kind of sheer confidence he has is absurd, he wasnt scared of adam, he wasnt scared of lucifer. he acts like someone who is just not used to being weaker than anyone. part of the reason hed be so desperate for freedom is because the deal is literally a threat on his life. he almost died for them!

tbh not sure if husk knows the specifics of the deal or not, because that scene in the finale could just be alastor being alastor. "haha bitch u thought" type beat. either way!! im pretty pumped for s2 and seeing alastors inevitable downward spiral. beat him up again. also maybe he makes some more friends pretty please

[awrkive]

People in X saying JK's post is his support for nwjns. That's interesting. Wanna know what goes on in his brain when he was silent amidst Yoongi's DUI issue that was blown out of proportion.

honestly im out of the loop with the whole situation bcs i dont really care about kpop like that anymore. idk much about newjeans (i listen to some of their music, but i can not tell you any name of a member), i knew of min hee jin's problematic past and her ongoing issues, and i know that hybe is a conglomerate and therefore u shouldnt ever side with it. BUT, i havent been in stan twt since 2020 and so i really am not knowledgeable about any issues.

but one thing i know is that those young girls are the victims and the adults around them have failed them a great deal.

jungkook is a grown man with autonomy, and he can speak for or against whatever he likes. i personally think its admirable that hes speaking for his younger coworkers who work in the same company, bcs he debuted at such a young age himself as well, and bts always had no one to protect them from anything that they had been through during their early years. to see him standing up for those literal teenagers who are clearly taken advantage of, thats commendable.

now, i will – nor all of us – never know what his thought process was for coming into "defense" for newjeans but not "stepping out" for yoongi when the hate train for him was fueled (the issue was so big it went to my local twitter account, mind u), but all i know is that we do not know these people beyond what they let us see. i believe jungkook and yoongi have a deeper, closer relationship with each other than what they show on cameras that has been shaped for more than a decade now, and we will never know the conversation between them (or amongst the tannies) when yoongi was going thru that.

HOWEVER, my truth is that: support does not necessarily only rely on social media posts. just bcs none of the tannies posted anything in support of yoongi around the time, does not mean anything big. again, we will never know how deep their relationships run. these are people who have been together for longer than some of us were born. i think theyre pretty secure in their relationship with each other, with or without social media posts.

[yarnclan]

Heres things i head cannon have changed culturally for the clans since the new prophecy/moving to the lake territories:

- General openness around borders, and awarness of the other clans. I know they have to hold onto this as a source of stupid conflict, but I like to think that the clans were even more agro about borders before. That yes, war over a squirrel was not only common, but expected. I also seem to remember that like... the location of the clan's various camps were secret in the first few books? Idk if i made that up, but it sure isn't the case at the lake. Its fascinating to me to think about how some of this is also due to the layout of the clans at the lake vs the old forest. At the lake they have to cross each others territory area every moon, where at the old forest they were all in separate little pizza slices. I also think Firestar being an outsider, and the kind of cat he is, gave a semi-skewed perspective of life in the forest in the first series, that he was more open and willing to transgress on borders than most other cats.

- Willingness to travel far beyond the territory. The journey that fireheart and greystipe take to find WindClan again is treated as a fairly big deal. But i dont think it takes them all that long? Implying WindClan hadn't gotten too far. Its just interesting in light of the many post new prophecy trips to the mountains and skyclan adjacent teritories and beyond. My personal headcannon is that everyone picked up better navigation skills of the journey and those skills have been peacmeal passed to newer generations. I miss the "traveling to mothermouth" requirment of the 1st series, and think it could have been cool if they had replaced it with like... a once a season journey/gathering at a midpoint with the tribe, where young cats get to learn different skills from traveling and from each other.

Greater contact with kittypets and twolegs. This ties into my headcannon that the lake being a campground/more integrated into twoleg activities means the clans just have more day to day contact with twolegs and twoleg related stuff than they did in the forest, though its a more managable ammount of twolegs than the high concentration of the town next to the old forest.

This is more of a geography headcannon but... it makes sense to think that the lake territories are bigger and more abundant with prey. It would explain why there are more cats, and also add a little bit to the slightly more relaxed aditude they take towards borders and prey. Though the geography/ size of the lake territories is hilariously inconsistent depending on the needs of what ever plot.

This is a bit more out there, but i also like to think that because the StarClan connection point is a pool that feeds into the lake they all live around, rather than a distant rock, its caused more cats to have a clear connection to StarClan/the after life. StarClan felt way more distant and vauge in the first series, and while i know its probably more of a stylistic change, it could also be because they are now all drinking magic water and eating prey that drinks magic water.

[bytchysylvy]

BODY THOUGHTS ESSAY PART 3/3

SOU CAST

(they werent meant to be spoilers but i forgot to mention it before so now its going to feel like a punch i guess, brace or dodge bitch)

rydara has a lot of mixed emotions because on one hand, he is soft and buff just as the vazuvyn ideals predicted, but on the other he is highly influenced by mortal media which looks at his build and the general largeness of vazuvyr with disgust. Dont even get him started about being a trans man while being the last child of udysna in a matriarchal society we dont have time for it. He is deeply insecure about his body and the binge eating problem isn't helping.

dathevar likes to think himself as the worlds fattest fuck and hopes to get fatter actually. his weight grounds his telekinesis and makes him literally, measurably more powerful than you could ever know. Hopes you bully him for it too because thats his kink. We are dealing with a sick fuck pervert here and we are all trapped on this planet with him.

vokutlvek has what theyre calling "post occupation syndrome" which is a self explanatory catch all diagnosis. For him it looks like his heart randomly giving out and fainting, chronic fatigue, the inability to get the strength he once had back, and erectile dysfunction. Only the other syrodsik and a few doctors know about it, he's too insecure about what's going on with him to be open about it. The fact he isn't as lean as he used to be gets to him despite the fact that most vazuvyr who lived through the occupation are now chubbier than they were before it, and its seen as a good thing, because to him its a reminder of whats going on. His body takes up more space now and he has nothing to show for it. Fears one day all his strength will be gone and he will be a useless drain on his kin.

azrem is a typical anorexic. Granted it comes less from a place of appearance and more that he is hypersensitive and gaining five pounds will feel like carrying a small child on him. And he already feels weak tired and exhausted for reasons no one could possible know so he cant afford to carry around more weight. While his appearance is very much not the vazuvyn ideal for a man he knows there is a subset of those who like his body type (such as his husband) and he tries his best to stay all dolled up to maintain that boytoy look.

qamkii is a perfectly plump little juicy pear of a man. he knows what he has. no notes.

medinyolv suffers from the dysphoria of wanting to turn themself into a dragon or perhaps a griffin. Outside this, they do not think much of their body except for how annoying it is to be so, so tiny among these giants. Its hard to let beauty standards get to you when you literally do not have a body like everyone around you.

udysna much enjoys being big and soft. its not that deep, she likes to roll down hills and likes having all the cushion she can have. she doesn't think, let alone about what mortal's think of her body.

norket knows he is a creature of great beauty and should never hide

the feelings silence has toward his body are beyond words, neither in a positive or negative way just. weird to exist like this but completely natural to do so

debatable if unknown has a body but if they do then its perfect

raqa is the most insecure specimen known to science. she could blow away in the breeze at any moment and is constantly aware of this. thinness being favored by mortals doesn't make her feel any better, vazuvyn women don't look like that, they arent skinny, who wants skinny bitches. she doesn't. she was spotted in seattle in need of a fat bitch.

panatyl loves her body because she will use it to tear you apart. doesnt know who attractiveness is or what it is.

glydenoras is ok. She's at an age where she has her clique of people who are attracted and available to her. Doesn't need much else other than that. Gets a little annoyed that people will think she's pregnant and ask considering how much trauma she has around it with all but one of her children being dead.

kudelsa has the benefit of being an age-old beauty ideal. Full hourglass figure complete with a thick waist. Of course she has a good relationship with her body. Though she keeps her attire reserved because its something sacred for only a few worthy of it. Her body is a temple, she takes care of it like one.

buvikiro is in the same boat but also is a beauty ideal for mortals since he has that stupid tiny waist. Knows she's a sex symbol to both mortals and vazuvyr dresses to appeal to both groups. Her body is an amusement park, open to anyone who can pay the fee.

[violentviolette]

Jack I have a question. Is this healthy or no?

So i am a very conflict avoidant person, but also an emotional bitch about everything all the time. I have over time learned to separate my emotions from logic though, and give space to both of them. The way I do this is that if someone upsets me but it’s not a genuine issue that needs communication on, I will tell them they’re okay/i’m okay, and then will vent the emotions elsewhere where they can’t see.

What I tell them is not a lie. I usually am not actually angry or whatever, but I have to give voice to my irrational emotions somewhere or it sticks in the back of my throat for the rest of the day/night/week/month (that’s not an exaggeration)

I only ask because people don’t seem to like or understand it so i don’t know. Am I insane? Am I being toxic? Or am I just being complicated™️? I dont know anymore.

My gf recently broke up with me over it so (someone sent her screenshots of my vents) :/

oh that sucks, im sorry someone did that because that is genuinely a normal and healthy thing like, we are going to sometimes think negative things about the people we love and care about. thats SUCH a normal human thing. ppl are going to get on our nerves or do things that bug us or any number of things and it is very much perfectly healthy to recognize when those feelings are either irrational or dissproportionate to the situation or just unhelpful or even mean and unfair, and instead of bringing any of that to the other person or putting that on them, to deal with those feelings privately away from them and then move on. like that is so incredibly normal and healthy a lot of people dont like that because a lot of people have issues with boundaries and control, and think that dating or being close friends with someone means ur entitled to their every thought and that anything u dont share with them is lying or hiding things from them. this is very unhealthy and can lead to lots of different kinds of abusive and negative behavior. we are all entitled to privacy, even from the people closest to us it sucks that someone showed her what should have been private conversations and its a p big breech of trust and boundaries on the part of that person. i'd be pissed af honestly. and it's understandable that ur gf was hurt by them, but since thats exactly the reason u didnt express any of that to her, it sucks that she saw them despite ur best efforts just to be very fair i will say that it's also understandable on her end that seeing them made her change her feelings and decide to break up, depending on the exact content of the vents it might have been hard to know u ever think of her that way or upsetting to know u speak about her that way to others. not saying the things u were saying were fucked up but ive known ppl who will vent about their partners with zero consideration for them as people and say things like "fuck that stupid bitch i hope she dies" or "she's just being a dumb whore" or other like deeply desparaging statements that go beyond expressing ur feelings and into value judgement of the other person and its understandable why someone would then immediately breakup with someone who speaks about them like that, even if its not to their face. so i feel like its an important contextual footnote that depending on the content of the vents it might make the situation less u healthily expressing ur feelings elsewhere and more its just not acceptable or okay to speak about a partner this way ever, even if its not to their face but again im not accusing u of that and am giving u the good faith benifit of the doubt that u were just having normal vents, which is not only absolutely a healthy thing, but is very much needed in relationships. u and ur partner should both of have spaces and circles outside of one another where u can speak and vent freely about eachother and get support and reassurance from other people without the involvment of ur partner at all. u both have a right to privacy from one another and u dont have to tell eachother ur every thought and ur allowed to have private feelings that u dont share with ur partner, even if those feelings are negative. those are basic and core parts of a healthy relationship so ur not just being toxic or insane.

[thebendsbyradiohead]

Heyy you spoke a bit about prison abolishment recently so I wanted to ask how you view the Gisèle Pelicot case and those men? And this isn’t some gotcha or whatever I am genuinely curious as I’ve struggled a lot with prison reform for a while and what that man has done is truly incomprehensible to me and I have no idea where would rehabilitation even begin in a case like that, he will likely die in prison but what if he’d been 40 instead of 70? Obviously I think prisons and the justice system need to be overhauled massively and this case is (supposedly) rare but gruesome crimes do still take place and idk how to reconcile such cases with rehabilitation/ letting them back into society

Also you said war criminals should be imprisoned but who decides that? Is it a body like the ICC? It took them what 70 years to only begin to deal with Is- rael and those arrest warrants are essentially meaningless (right now at least) so how would we agree on who the criminals are and how would we actually implement justice?

(Sorry ik this is a big question im just interested in your thoughts i dont expect you to solve prison systems for me lol)

no worries, i know you're not setting a trap for me and i'm always glad to enter a discussion of this sort! after all that's how we arrive at solutions in my opinion

yes, i agree the gisele pelicot case is beyond disheartening and it can feel defeating to watch all of what happened and see the (comparatively maybe) disproportionate punishments to the crime. but at the risk of sounding naive, i invite you to look at it from another point of view. to me, this case is emblematic of everything wrong in our society and in fact, provides a great argument in favor of rehabilitation. those men were from every class, every race, every age and they all did those despicable things. they didn't do those thing because they are inherently evil, they did them because they were taught for generations that this kind of thing is okay. look at it like the cult of patriarchy, if we manage to rehabilitate its cult members cases like these in theory should not exist (fwiw i don't think this is a rare case per se, more like the magnitude is rare). it's an idealistic idea but if we all started doing that with our children eventually we could achieve a society where violence like this is completely minimized (i won't say eliminated entirely because i don't believe that's feasible)

as for dominique pelicot dying in prison at 70 instead of being caught earlier, the reason why he was caught at all is because an officer followed up on his up-skirt picture taking & requested evidence, something that's not usually treated that way in france (which kinda proves why the police force sucks ass lol). there is a world where he was never caught & for all the horror i'm glad that he was caught and will receive ANY kind of punishment. that being said he is also in a way a product of his environment/the patriarchy that ever led anyone to believe this is in any way permissible. (the likelihood of so many of the men saying they "didn't know she wasn't in on it" is probably too high to be truthful but i do think some of them genuinely believe what they did was no big deal & to me that's the scariest part & what we need to change from the root)

war criminals are a way more complex topic imo that's very difficult to navigate and despite my criticisms of the ICC i do understand why it takes them so long to proceed with arrest warrants and judicial decisions. proving a war crime is a very difficult thing because war is rarely simple and black & white. even in the case of attack on sovereignty & potential genocidal intentions, the wronged party could STILL commit war crimes. take a look at kosovo, why do you think they're only just now prosecuting members of the KLA who committed war crimes? i honestly don't know and don't have a potential solution to this aside from the ICC which is flawed but I do think a tribunal similar to it would have to be in charge of evaluating war crime allegations, hopefully without any attachment or bias towards certain countries and governments lol

hope this makes sense as i wrote the first part a week ago and the other one just now but i tried articulating my thoughts as best as i could