#and as the saying goes -- good things never last! and im sure they prob gave up trying to find a good thing for a long time

[ruporas]

bound to want (part two) /// part one rest of pages under READ MORE after ID

[ID: 23 page digital comic of Vashwood from Trigun Maximum. The comic is in a limited palette of a dark blue, light pink, white, black, and a light beige color for Vash's skin and a mid-brown color for Wolfwood's. This comic is the second part to "Bound to Want" and is spoiler-free. The first part is linked here.

It begins with a panel close up of Vash's expressions. The sky colored in dark blue can be seen behind him. He has a neutral expression, but he holds a slight frown and the reflection of his glasses covers one side of his eyes. Wolfwood says, "Hey. What's with the distance?" In the second panel, the shot widens to show both of them, a clear physical distance separating them with Wolfwood walking ahead and Vash trailing a little behind. Vash responds, "What? I'm just walking a bit slower today..." Wolfwood looks at him with a an irritated expression, clicking his tongue. Wolfwood says, "I was going to wait for you to start... But yer just running away away."

Vash is seen looking away, unable to hold eye contact with Wolfwood as he continues, "You've been avoiding me since that night. Did ya think I wouldn't notice? It's about that dream, right? Tell me about it already if you're going to be moping like this." Vash looks slightly downwards, his brows furrowing and he starts to walk ahead of Wolfwood without looking at him and responds stiffly, "I really don't want to talk about it..." Wolfwood looks at him with a surprised expression, but doesn't probe.

A panel close up to Wolfwood's eyes as he watches Vash go on ahead before he follows suite with an irritated sigh. The panels are overlapped by Wolfwood's hand holding the bottle of the Bride with motion lines, indicating a transition in time.

A wide shot of Vash and Wolfwood in a room now. Vash is seated, his back turned away from the viewer, while Wolfwood's body faces the viewer with his eyes looking towards Vash. He rests the bottle of the Bride on the table with a "clack" and his other hand holds two shotglasses. The background is coated in a light pink.

A panel shows a close up of Wolfwood's face, his eyes looking downwards to Vash as he says, "Let's drink." Next to this panel is Vash looking up at Wolfwood, his brows furrowed and a slight frown. The bottom half of the page is a wider shot with Vash's body turned away from the viewer as he says, "I'm not going to talk about it." Wolfwood responds, "You don't have to." as he sits down.

A wide panel of Wolfwood holding the shotglass, pouring in the drink as he continues, "I'll talk." The next panel is a profile view of Wolfwood, his eyes looking down at the now filled shotglass as he continues to say, "You're..."

"... upset with me." Vash can be seen next to this speech bubble with narrowed eyes, looking towards Wolfwood. The panels are all coated in with a dark blue background. Wolfwood continues, "I can't be certain why since yer not telling me a thing -- but it's probably... my bad." The panels show Wolfwood about to bring the shotglass to his mouth but he turns way as he continued to speak, his eyes not on Vash. The bottom page shows him looking away completely with a guilty expression as he says, "I'm sorry.

If you can ever tell me why, I can try and adjust to make it more bearable. But if you're just trying to get rid of me--" The panels follow Wolfwood's certain expression as he says this, "I don't intend to leave you. I can't... and I won't." A panel shows Vash's wide-eyed expression, surprised upon hearing this, and then his eyes soften as Wolfwood again concludes with, "I'm sorry."

Vash's inner thoughts begins, a boxed speech at the center of the page and panels of his eyes, his brows furrowing again and a resigned, but frustrated expression. His thoughts starts, "Stop. I shouldn't be happy hearing that. And why are you apologizing? I should be the one to..! I can't let anything like that happen to you. You deserve to live a long steady and peaceful life. I want to be optimistic. I want to protect you, but I might end up doing the opposite." The text surrounds Wolfwood from Vash's perspective, the other man drinking out of his shotglass, his eyes downcasted.

"I shouldn't have you. And you won't leave." Behind these text is a panel of Wolfwood's eyes finally looking over to Vash. Vash's thoughts continues,  "It's so unfair." When Wolfwood sees Vash, his eyes soften and he frowns. The last panel shows the lower half of Vash's face, but tears begins to flow down his cheek. Wolfwood's hand is already reaching to wipe at them as he starts to say, "You know..."

A wider shot of Vash and Wolfwood, Vash slightly leaning forward with his mouth tightly shut, and tears steadily continuing to flow out of his closed eyes. Wolfwood continues to wipe at them with his hand as he continues, "This isn't a dream anymore. I don't know what you saw for you to be this shaken up, but whatever happened, you'll overcome it, right? If not you, I'm here too. You'll be okay, Spikey. So..." Wolfwood's expression grows more tender, "Have a little faith in me... and come back already." The dark blue starts to fade.

The wide panel has the dark blue background faded and replaced is the light pink. It shows Vash in full up to his shoulders, his eyes are still tears littered, but there's light in them as he says, "Wolfwood..." making eye contact with the other. The next panel shows Wolfwood's tender expression, his eyes and brows fully soften and he has a small smile on his lips, finally seeing the other return a level of sincerity with him.

The next panel shows the bottom half of Wolfwood's face and his hand is offered towards Vash for a dance as he says, "C'mon. We don't have to talk, but this is okay, right?" The background is now white and a ribbon flowing across the page separates this panel from the next sequence. Vash's inner thoughts continus, "I've spent too long avoiding this. It's scary to want after I've taken so much from others." A sequence close up of their hands is shown, with Wolfwood's outstretched hand on the right and Vash's reaching hand on the left. Vash gently places his hand in Wolfwood and at the bottom, Wolfwood wraps his fingers across Vash's.

Throughout the page, a dark blue ribbon starts to flow around the both of them with confetti raining alongside the effect. Vash and Wolfwood are hand and hand, dancing together with Wolfwood as the lead. The viewer can see a peak of Vash's expression, full of fondness but also a hint of sorrow as he looks down at Wolfwood. His inner thoughts continue, "I don't deserve this. I don't deserve you. But why is that even though I have these burdens, I still want to love you. I still want you to be by my side."

With a close up of their mouths, Vash's thoughts continue, the text covering his mouth, "Wolfwood, I--" Wolfwood's speech bubble covers Vash's text as he completes his sentence, "want you." Vash's eyes widen for one panel and in the next, his eyes spark, a blush appearing on his cheek and the confetti flows and spark. Tears ease up on his eyes again.

"Want me too already, Spikey." Wolfwood has leaned in enough to rest his head against Vash, a hand of his on Vash's neck, holding his nape and another hand pressed gently against his back. A ribbon separates this panel from the next, a mix of confetti flows across the page, as Vash envelopes Wolfwood in a hug too, holding him and his hand gripping tightly onto his back.

This page is just the ribbon flowly throughout the page on the white background, one white ribbon and the other a dark blue. Near the bottom, the ribbon envelopes each other in a loop. A conversation of Vash and Wolfwood is held over these ribbons, Vash starting to say, "What if I hurt you? What if you..?" Wolfwood responds, "You? How could you hurt me?" Vash, "You know what I mean... You see it everyday..." Wolfwood responds, "If you think I'm going to kick the bucket so easily, I suggest you look at me more closely from now on, idiot. I'm not that easy to get rid of."

The next page has the ribbon criss cross over the top of the page. Vash and Wolfwood can be seen in their dancing position again, Wolfwood now resting a hand on Vash's shoulder, as Vash takes the lead. Vash continues, "Well, I know that... I tried." Wolfwood responds, "But you won't anymore... since you want me... around, yeah?" Wolfwood's head cocks to the side, smiling with assurance, cheeks flushed. Vash looks at him with a wide smile and fond, loving eyes. The confetti flows across the bottom of this page and as it eases into the next page, it starts to disappear.

Vash responds, ".. Yeah... I do..." as he pulls Wolfwood into a hug again. Wolfwood says, "Not going to run away anymore, are you?" Vash says, "No... I trust you." A panel shows Wolfwood's turning away slightly with a shy expression, muttering "Geez..."

In a more simplified style, Wolfwood is seen gripping Vash's cheeks now with his hand, "Though... You do remember you avoided me for two weeks straight, right? How are you going to make that up to me?" Wolfwood asks. Vash responds with eyes closed and a pucker of his lips. A vein of irritation appears on Wolfwood's face. Wolfwood starts to squeeze at Vash's cheek with both hands, shouting, "Now that you've recovered, you're trying to be funny, huh?!" Vash says through the squished cheeks, "I'm just happy..."

The next page opens with a closed up panel of Vash's widen eye as Wolfwood's hand moves from squishing his cheeks to gently holding them and Wolfwood leans in. The inner thoughts starts again, "There's a chance I'm not making the right choice... My dreams, my fears of losing you, it will never go away. But you said you won't let it happen... And I want to hang onto your words closely this time. After all, if it's anyone who can make me believe, it's you."  The white ribbon from previous pages flows across the page and it visibly ends at the bottom of the page, enclosing the two of them as they share a gentle kiss with Vash holding Wolfwood's face, a tear in his eye.

The next pages starts with Wolfwood saying, "You cryin' again?" Vash responds, "I'm just grateful..." Wolfwood responds, "But you've always had me." Vash responds, "Being like this is different from staring at you from behind all the time though..." The two can be seen together again, Wolfwood pressing his elbows against the table with Vash leaning over him. Wolfwood is easing the tears out of Vash's eye again, just like earlier. A close panel of Vash's fond expression is seen as he says, "Thank you, Wolfwood." Wolfwood looks up at him with a small smile, gentle eyes. Confetti starts to flow lightly across the page as text starts to appear against the white background, "I'm the one who's grateful...

That you'd embrace someone like me, when I'm not fit to hold you in the first place... But I know better than to hesitate. The moment I acknowledged it, I knew I'd spend the rest of my life loving you. So, have as much of me as you want, Vash."

The final page shows the confetti gently falling down the page and at the bottom shows Vash and Wolfwood pressing their foreheads together, Wolfwood's hands cupping the side of Vash's face gently, and both of them smiling brightly with each other. ID END]

[marengogo]

hi dunno if you had this question or not but do u think before jikook become a "thing" vmin and jihope messed around... cos if u ask other blogs they will beat around the bushes but aint nobody actually answering lol im saying this cos vmin are close as jihope hobi was his roomate tho (roomates) i didnt see jimin &hobi dynamic turn around like this until bv in malta or burn the stage..?

anyway it doesnt changr my opinion on jikook im just curious cos it looks like they prob messed around lol and

at some point i think rm had a crush on jimin too thats why sometimes jungkook had ?? a "problem with minimoni " monitoring jikook

Hello Anon,

Sure, let’s talk abou it.

No, I don’t think JM messed around with any other member in BTS before, during or after JK. Short answer; amongst other factors, one (not the main factor but  …) is it would take a person who actually thinks they are desired in such a manner to do so, and quite unfortunately, for the longest time, I do believe JM didn’t believe himself to be said person at all. As for the Long answer, let’s look at each pairing you mentioned, shall we?

Let’s start with giving some context to my thoughts: 

Not sure if you read any other of my posts, but I think 2015 was the year JK started “peacocking” so to say, at JM, and through ups and downs it took them 2017/2018 to actually enter a steady relationship and by steady I don’t mean they were in an open relationship prior to this. What I mean is that they both were trying to figure out things like, for example; what they actually were feeling for each other, or would them “being together” actually work, or could they really actually do this., etc, etc etc.  

Furthermore, I should add, that I believe JM “taunting” JK with requests of kisses and telling him he liked him and wanted to go out with him etc, as they already had a very good relationship off-camera (as proven by various interviews), was just an also quite naive approached mixing at an attempt to establish a connection with JK on camera, with feelings he still himself hadn’t quite properly acknowledged. In simple words: He was consciously kidding about feelings he subconsciously already had but never really took seriously. 

Last but not least, I’m team: JK made the actual first move, which is not to be confused with: he fell first, he fell harder, etc … whatever with all that BS. And yes, people are entitled with their own opinions, but yeah, I didn’t see none of that. I’m talking about moves. If you will, look at it as a chess game, at some point in 2015 JK impulsively/(frustratedly) moved a pawn at a game neither he or JM knew they were playing; and the “game” began. 

Ok … now that you have the pretext, let’s go back to our regularly scheduled program of the day: 

VMIN: We have a period between 2012 (when JM joined BH) and 2015 where JM supposedly would have had the time to be messing around with Tae. Because after 2015, JK’s not very well structured (lol) plan of action kept JM rather busy (added to the fact that JM was going through personal awakenings of his own). Now this particular friendship during and pre 2015 gave us pearls such as this:

JM and Tae have a very deep, unique and special friendship and  like every relationship in the world, context matters, but like every great relationship, theirs, goes beyond that (context). Their context was/is South Korea, being both of the same age bracket (‘95) they had a common ground on which they began to bond, as age is an important factor in SK, but then there was more. For example, they just so happened to fall into the catching up team. One (JM) arrived last in the group, and was playing catch up internally (with the members), the other had been there for a while, but was only revealed after debut, so he was playing catch up externally (with fans not knowing about him until debut). And please don’t think that one is harder than the other, particularly not on the scale of things they were in.  

And there were their personalities. What were the chances that two young men, so different in thoughts and actions could be so compatible in soul/Seoul? Tae standing up for JM at school, JM playing along with Tae’s acting passion, them allowing themselves to be vulnerable with each other. Making mistakes with each other. Taking the time to make it right with each other. We are never going to know how deep this connection goes between the two of them. And here is where you might think: “I’d want to give it a go romantically with such a connection!”. I’d want to as well, NGL,  if only I had realised it and if my preferences were also so inclined. 

But here’s what I think happened/ was(is) the situation:

1. Tae, out of all the members was/is the one member, who knew/knows exactly who he is. And I can’t assume people’s sexualities, but, in MY opinion,  from what I’ve seen, I feel like he is a very big ally, but straight (or at the very least queer-curious? Those that even exist?).  I think Tae is very secure in his skin and loves to test his limits constantly and not because it is fun to do, but because he can and it would possibly allow him to maybe gain something from doing so. Most likely, all the time spent being a secret member, also gave him the time to think about how he wanted to be perceived, which also eventually would have ended up affecting everything else positively or negatively. So when it came to JM, someone he started to feel really close to, he let his guard down, completely. So much so that sometimes he just would almost test him, or throw at him anything that he came across in his mind, just to see how far their relationship could go? And, even if at some point he did think to maybe try and give it a go romantically, the next point came up.

2. JM wasn’t up for it. Not in a mean way or dismissive way, not at all; you really got to care a lot about someone to end up fighting and being emotionally-drunk over fucking dumplings. Let that sink in. Another thing that needs to sink in is that JM does, and will do, what he feels and what he wants. Always (Ironically enough, so will Tae, another thing they have in common). At the time, JM was the last member to join, he was struggling with his identity, he was publicly struggling with JK (not irrelevant) and who knows what more. So his brain had to somehow work with processes of elimination to keep sane and in my opinion, if ever Tae made a move, it was shut down, because JM also needed friends. Friends are always needed. Friends are important, have them if you can. And I do think that Tae was friendzoned, early on, because he was a good friend at that. Tae was his ‘95 buddy, his “we are kinda going through the same shit” buddy, his let’s conquer the musical world together buddy. But all was very platonic, because, even though the subconscious may not be out there; it is there and JK was in it. 

JIHOPE: Jung Hoseok. The worlds’ brightest ray of light with a powerful little cloud hidden at the corner of his caring soul. In a way, just like JM a troubled soul (like every member really  … like everyone on this planet really!). But Hobi and JM had something else to bond over first and foremost: DANCE. That probably started the conversation with the two of them but then there was fashion, shopping, laughing at dumb stuff, the aching need to become the best version of oneself, the natural want to find and provide comfort to those who needed it the most. 

Hobi and JM connected on a nurturing level. One thing I feel strongly about, is that Hobi never had any sort of romantic thoughts towards any of the members in BTS and perhaps a part of JM picked up on that and allowed him to feel “secure”. Secure in the sense where he knew that every touch, every hug, every kiss (we are talking of friendly pecks) was out of caring love, and had no chance of being misinterpreted, ever. Reason why I think JM had singled out Hobi as the mother of the group at the very beginning, but now I do believe that Hobi is kinda like that caring brother, who would do anything to support his brothers.

Also, something that people seem to either not think about, or just really underestimate is that Hobi was spending quite a lot of time with JK as well. 3J get along, not only because they are good dancers. I’ve always felt that out of all the hyungs, Hobi was the one that truly treated JK like an actual little brother, allowing him to pester him, and not in the same way he did with Jin. Jin mentally also becomes a maknae (or even younger, lol) when he gets into it. Hobi just had that big brother vibe doting on a cute little brother, something that JM has tried as well, but was never quite like Hobi.

Another thing that Hobi does a lot is observe, he is a quick learner, he observes and quickly puts in practice. I can guarantee you there was a lot of that while he was hanging out with Jikook and part of me thinks that at some point, he observed and put in practice by questioning JM. Hobi has this way of nonchalantly bringing up pertaining/delicate points in any situation, without making a big deal out of it. This might have eventually made him become someone who JM could confide in and talk to about things he didn’t necessarily know how to with others.

And last ..

JK and MINIMONI: I’ve actually quite recently written about Minimoni, so please do read this if you would → CORONA BOREALIS - 1: The Emphat & The Intellectual - MiniMoni. Upon reading that (if you do) you’ll see why I think, neither ever had feelings for each other. So, no Joon never had a crush on JM. Now because of another very long ask (sent to me now an eternity ago), I just so happen to have to write about NamKook, so look out for it, it’s going to be called → CORONA BOREALIS - 2: WonderBoy & The Wanderer - NamKook, should be coming out pretty soon. 

But to answer your question, I don’t think JK has ever had a problem with RM monitoring them (neither did JM), I think he’d probably understand that Namjoon would have no other choice but to do so on occasion, particularly if things seemed like they were getting out of hand. If anything, at the very beginning JK has had moments in which he seemed uncomfortable with MiniMoni’s interactions, which was probably caused by unintelligible fears and projections, (which were directed at JM rather than RM) and as humans who have lived on this planet we all know a little bit about this don’t we? … But JK’s possible insecurities are a whole other story, isn’t it?

Currently, I think JK appreciates Namjoon’s presence more than we know, and because he knows him, and knows JM, he most likely understands why and on what level MiniMoni connect. I think that JK has been on a mission, for a while now, to have RM see him as a capable grown ass man, he’d like for the man he admires to look at him and think “yeah, you really do got this, don’t you?” (not that I don’t think Namjoon doesn't already think this of JK), but I also believe that deep down JK just needs someone to keep looking up to and not someone he has to beat, if it makes sense? But I’ll better discuss this in the NamKook post I’m writing.

Well, not sure that I’ve answered your questions but I sure did express my opinions in this long-ass post haven’t I? MY BAD.

Always very respectfully your 🫰🏾💜,

Marengo. 

[tsukishimas-shortcake]

Relationship Headcanons

↦ Character(s): Hakkai Shiba x fem!reader

↦ Rating/Warning: No rating though there are some light mentions of abuse (if you have read the manga you are aware of what I am talking about, I’m not going very deep into it though it literally just mentions it), mentions of anxiety attacks (no detail though), fluff, not proof read

↦ Word count: 1.8k (longer than planned, sections are bolded)

↦ Your Momo’s Receipt: Hello~ I’m post yet another TR headcanon and this was requested by the lovely @strawbub I hope this doesn’t disappoint, it did get longer than planned but I enjoyed writing it. I'll prob do a part two that's more of a scenario based on your first date or something since I didn't go into it here. Please note: for those of you who don’t know my blog is currently under construction, meaning I will not be updating my masterlist for the time being.

So how did you guys meet, well mostly because of Yuzuha,

One day in like elementary you’re walking home and you see this super pretty middle school girl just like yelling at this small group of guys

The guys end up running off just because they don’t wanna deal with her or the attention she's drawn to them

Behind her was a boy, taller than her but obviously younger. You didn’t assume they knew eachother though.

The boy and yuzuha began walking in opposite directions because one was going home while the other was going to pick up something like groceries

You’re so entranced by how she stood up to them yet she’s a girl who was far smaller and you end up catching up to her, almost stepping on her heels

You end up absent mindedly following her into the grocery store and eventually she just freezes, turns, and stare directly at you

Your eyes widen since you must’ve been staring and she just goes “may I ask why you’re following me?” And you explain how cool she was earlier. She invites you over for dinner (esp since her older brother won’t be home) and figured it’d be good for Hakkai to meet someone his age

You end up going over but Hakkai didn’t come down to eat so you never actually got to meet him, though from then on you would see Yuzuha every so often, visit every other weekend or so

But no matter how often you came over the next few months, you never once met hakkai,

That was until you both reached the end of your middle school education and we’re about to begin high school

You had gone over because you were going to borrow an old work book from Yuzuha, and when you go to knock on the door the door opens before your closed fist could hit it, instead hitting a firm chest

You blush and quickly apologize but the person in front of you doesn’t move at all, doesn’t say anything and almost looks like they drifted into space with their dead stare

You assume this is yuzuha’s older brother because you’ve also never met him and you immediately turn to walk away but Yuzuha calls over hakkai’s shoulder

“Y/N-Chan! You just got here where are you going?” This was def not yuzuha’s older brother. There’s no way she’d be that happy with him around; oh my god. Realization hit, the guy who you hit (though it was more of a tap) was hakkai.

The hakkai you had only caught a glimpse of in yuzuha’s photos, never talked to or actually seen in person despite going to the same school and living in the same neighborhood

He must hate you. That’s why he avoids you. That’s def why - is what you think

Yuzuha drags hakkai back inside and invites you in; you sit down with them in the living room and watch hakkai visibly relax now that he’s inside his house, his own space, with a pillow behind him and a blanket covering his lower half, he almost curls up into it as he continues to avoid your stare

“Hi hakkai…Kun? Im L/N Y/N” you say and you see his face dead pan once again

Yuzuha can be heard laughing from the kitchen as she comes back in.

She leans over and begins explaining that hakkai literally just freezes with any interaction between him and girls who aren’t in his family

You nod, thinking maybe it’s an anxiety thing? Which is the case with you, but only because he’s been watching you since you’ve come over (not in a creepy way) wanting to and working the courage up to talk to you

The 5th or so time you came over after that encounter he was inches away from introducing himself before the house phone rang causing everyone to kind of “wake up” in a sense

Every time since then he gets closer and closer but isn’t able to say anything; he even realizes he has a crush on you.

The way you sit when you do homework and how cute you look when you’re focused.

How your forehead scrunches up when you’re trying to figure something out and you end up just sitting back with a small huff followed by yuzuha’s signature laughter.

It’s also a huge thing that you get along with Yuzuha.

So enough with first meeting time for the confession.

He ends up confessing accidentally. He didn’t know you were coming over to begin with so he was flustered out of his mind. And how was he supposed to know you hadn’t actually fallen asleep and you could hear him over the tv

The tv was more white noise than anything and the day was hot since it was the middle of summer causing the window to be open and the sound of soft wind and small birds to drift in; this was the hot that makes you tired so you were all sprawled out of just sitting in a daze

So while resting your head on the table you’re dozing in and out but then you hear hakkai begin to speak, something he never really did around you

Now did you and hakkai text? Yes. Did it take him an hour to reply because his brain would explode when you replied to him? Yes. But was it a start to communication? Also a yes.

You hear him say your name quietly before he moved closer, you can feel his gaze on your features

“I like you” is all he says. Simple and sweet. But you sit there in shock, trying not to blush so he’ll have no idea you heard him but he can tell because your forehead scrunches

You heard him and are focused on if you should reply or not. And he knows that.

You open your eyes and just look up at him, he’s closer than expected. His hand close to yours on the floor and he reaches over and grabs it lightly. Hoping you’ll also return the gesture by holding his hand instead of leaving your hand limp inside his.

And you do, thank goodness, and Hakkai almost mentally can’t handle it.

Once you start dating it’s more so just hanging out at his house or yours; however he talks a bit more and you text a lot more. He’s gotten better at replying. It usually takes him like 15 minutes now

He’s kinda stressed about your relationship but not due to anything you or him did

He’s stressed because of the mentality his older brother gave him

Is he even allowed to be this happy?

He finally has someone thats small enough and naive enough that he can protect you; compared to constantly being protected it’s a sudden, strong, yet good change for him

He’s touch s t a r v e d

Yes Yuzuha shows affection; but he stopped accepting her hugs when he was around 8 just because he physically wasn’t able to handle it due to his bruises and such

But with you, even with his bruises and all you take care of him. Able to coax him into using medicines and toning down the physical violence (that he can control himself)

He also finds it super soothing when you lightly brush over his scars (especially those that his brother gave him), it helps him believe that scars are only physical and can fade with help

One thing that stresses him out the most is trying to hide you from his brother. Any time you leave something at the house its easy to pass it off as yuzuha's but when it comes to things like photos he has with you, he can't hang them up, show them off, or have them as his phone Lock Screen, etc. because he just really doesn't want his brother to know and target you since he'll then know that you're his weakness (aside from yuzuha as well)

Sometimes won't explain why he can't hang out and has legit pushed you out of his house before at the last minute notice of his brother coming home

Will always make sure you get home safe though, usually by having Yuzuha go with you since then she can just say you're a friend from school

Your parents love him, though they were a bit hesitant it became a "you always have a place to stay" because they learned about their family situation from you and yuzuha. So expect him to spend the night when he's too scared to deal with his brother. Same with yuzuha. (yes I know this isn't yuzuha head canons but its hard to write for him without mentioning her when they're so close)

We're talking three person sleep overs. Yuzuha and you of course share the bed and Hakkai takes some time to even set foot in your room much less sleep on a mattress that's on the floor

He has a small heart attack every time he comes into your room because he's overwhelmed with everything, he's never been so comfortable and it makes him feel restless. Like he's never and I mean n e v e r been less stressed and slept better than when he does so in your room

The smell, the colors, just being surrounded by you is something that completely changes his mood

Once showed up after he fought with his brother, tears in his eyes and clothes a bit tattered and you just pulled him to your room, and sat down with him.

You laid on your bed with him laying down onto of you, head on your chest as you rubbed his head and only said a few words "its not your fault"

He ends up crying so hard he falls asleep and gets dehydrated and you have to make him drink a bunch of water when he finally wakes up.

NSFW

super fucking careful w you

almost annoyingly so, but you're understanding

He knows that he might be taking things frustratingly slow but he knows that since you understand and know his history that you can help him get through it

Your first time you think you'll have to call it off because he's shaking so bad

"baby... are you sure it won't hurt you?" he keeps asking.

pretty sure that's the longest its ever taken him to finish because he was so anxious

despite being so slow and hesitant, late he isn't too scared to get a bit rougher

but im not talking anything crazy im talking like he's willing to pull your hair a bit or nip a bit harder at your neck.

Please never ask him to do anything like degrade you or some type of harsh physical rough shit, he can't

like literally im 99% sure that if you ask him to choke you or something he will pass out because of the anxiety attack he would have at even the thought.

in short with nsfw though he is sweet boy. He's a switch through and through. Loves when you take care of everything because then he doesn't have to be scared of hurting you.

[woozi]

l&r shua and specially studio choom l&r shua... i still have no idea how i survived that, also it gave us blue hair cheol too <3 ... him sleeveless with blue hair, there are so many happy things just from this cb jdjsksskks i adore it.

wonshua fr were something else during l&r... omg after school, I'm guessing you've been into kpop way before me. anytime any clip from 17tv pops up i'm just ' they're so smol here they're so cute ' but also most of the time i have no context as well it's djjdsjskks. idk why but svt club is still something i find myself watching again i really liked its concept and them talking and sharing their thoughts it's very simple but also heart-warming.

is it creepy if i say i kind of did sghjkk i actually got to know you are interested in got7 recently when i ended up clicking the links in your bio. i swear im not a weird stalker jdjeekke i've been following your got7 blog way before than this one djdjdjjddj i only found this svt one recently after i decided to completely move back to tumblr and started following svt accs. I didn't know both blogs were you for a long time jddjdkd i apologize if it does seem lil creepy JDJDKSKSLS

jinyoung and mark are my biases, my ults actually <3 and yess i'm keeping up w/ their solo projects even more than before 😭 it's so jdjdkdkd. 2017 was the year i started listening to kpop and around that time or lil later i came across ' you are ' this song is so dear to me i loved it in first listen, its lyrics i love its lyrics sm i made everyone i know listen to it dhjddk yet i didn't dive in deeper bc i was caught up with other group at that time but slowly I started watching their content from 2018. it's like got7's been w/ me since the start & at the same time not </3 but look, lullaby and more importantly spinning top came and everything changed with that album it's so goood from then i started keeping up with their music and check their cbs. i knew jype was meh even when i didn't stan them but i didn't know to what extent, i only got to know after 2019. so far it's all so good and i hope it stays like that. all of their different companies treat and promote them nicely 🥺.

with svt it was instant love i got to know abt them during march 2019 ig, their songs grew on me so fast and boom by the time may came i was a carat, with got7 it was gradual love, it increased lil by lil it's nice but i do wish i could've stanned them earlier. the only cb experience as an official birdie i have is nbtm and last piece 😭 anyway both of these groups are very dear to me not just musically but emotionally too. i love them very much 😔.

also omg those are some of the great artists!! i honestly have no idea how khh and krnb are i mostly listen to kpop and kbands more. i actually listen to a lot of artists but regularly only zayn, svt, got7, the rose (ik we're talking abt kpop but i can't leave zayn out of this djdjdkdk he's the first ever artist i have stanned <3)

also onewe, n.flying, a.c.e, gaho ( i love his voice <3) woodz, day6. yk when you want new music but also something which you'd instantly enjoy otherwise you don't want new music sghjk, when i feel like this i just go to any of their discography. also special mention to hoppipolla and lucy bc they always bring something new to the table i love them for it. i love these artists but honestly i listen to them when i am in mood. i listen to gotsvt and zayn the most at the end of the day. goodnight <3 i love talking to you too 🥺🥺🥺 also feel free to answer late when you're free. hoping i made sense in this one and answered everything bc i am too sleepy rn fjdjkd - 🪂

BLUE HAIRED COUPSIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WITH THE RIPPED ARMS!!!!!!!!!!!1

iconique if u ask me <3 i heard lnr was indeed a good era for everyone!! wasn't it also cheol's first cb after his break? y'all must've had Fun fun

yes i have 😭 i grew up w koreans so... i guess that's also an influence. i got into kpop on my own volition during 4th grade though, so that's prob 2009/10??? GOD I FEEL SO ANCIENT RN!!!! honestly i still dk what 17tv was about i feel like we were just watching streams of some boys w no context as well 😭 AND YES OMG I GET THAT!! svt club is super chill and it's a great way of learning more abt the members!

JKDFJKKJDFFDKJ HELP!!!!!!!!!!! WAIT OH MY GOD YOU WERE IN MY G7 BLOG 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 IM SO EMBARRASSED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 as i've mentioned last time, got7 got me back into kpop and consequently tumblr 😭😭😭 i 'left' tumblr too and was just checking in occasionally, so when i made that g7 sideblog i was WAY behind the times and my first edits were so fucking- 😭 everything about me then was also so performative idk why i felt the pressure to be in on the club 😭 why were you not annoyed with me then 😭 i'd block me if i saw me on the dash KJFKJFDKJDF thank god i got over it though (or should i be.. i'm a menace on the dash now <3 KJDKKJDFKJF) AND NOOO OMG it's not creepy at all. i put those links in for people to see them after all!! and i'm actually kind of honored you followed me even w/o knowing its me <3 i feel like i've passed the vibe check JJFDKJKJFD do you also follow my main 👀 i rmb someone greeting me here on my bday who said the exact same thing you did 😭

U LIKE OLD MAN JINYOUNG 😭😭😭 ok that makes sense w ur svt bias line tbh <3 i like jinyoung a lot too he's such a smug pain in the ass <3 ALSO MORK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i l*ve mark oh my god i- i know i keep saying this... but ur taste <3 AND YOU ARE 😭😭 THE ERAS YOU DISCOVER/GET INTO GROUPS ARE SOOOO GOOD </3 you are was so meaningful to them, and i'm still so incredibly proud of them for this regardless of commercial success. also what group were u into that time omg 👀 I ALSO GOT INTO THEM DURING SPINNING TOP ERA KJFDKJFDKJFJKFDJKFD WHY ARE WE SO SIMILAR!! u seem to like jaebeom's songs a lot <3 AND MS LULLABY!!! oh my god that's my favorite era <3 and yeah, so true bestie, i couldn't be happier for them they're doing FAR better than they have ever had compared to when they were in that shitty company. i'm still so amazed how they pulled all of this off though. jaebeom's must've went thru loads of papework he was prob so determined to show that old man what they are capable of FDJKDFJKD

NAURRR OMG IT'S SO CUTE HOW U PUT IT THAT WAY!! and i'm sure you'll get to experience more cbs with the 7 <3 they were already hinting at it yesterday on twt JKFDJKJKFD

OHHH THAT'S COOL!!! i haven't had a chance to listen much to kbands now, and if u ask me abt them the first ones that come to mind are ft island and cnblue bc im a kpop hag 😭 OH WAIT MAYBE DAY6 for the new ones?? my friends have also been recommending n.flying, the rose, and onewe to me. which bands do you listen to? and zayn??????? <3 ur so right abt that DFKJKJDFFDKJFD also omg go listen to khh they changed my life <3 i can give u a playlist if u'd like!! <3

OH WAIT THERE GOES THE BANDS FKDGKJKJF i usually reply paragraph by paragraph without reading the whole ask so JDFKJDFJK WAIT WOODZ????????????????????????? HELLO???????????????????? I LOVE THAT MAN!!!!!!!!!!!!! HE'S SO SEXIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and he's so cute too if that helps </3 ALSO MOOD I CANT BRING MYSELF TO LISTEN TO NEW MUSIC NOWADAYS EVEN IF I WANT TO BC OF THE SAME EXACT REASON 😭 the way we get each other is so- and i've never heard of hoppipolla omg i'll go listen to them now!! indeed <3 gotsvt is our home <3

and nooo u are so cute omg </3 and don't feel pressured to respond immediately to me as well!! i'm a v late replier but i'll always reply JKJKFDJKFD AND DW everything u said made perfect sense <3 i hope u get/got a good night's rest!! and that you'll have an awesome day ahead <3

[purplesurveys]

878

Can you lift more than 100lbs? I can’t even lift 100 lbs flat. The most I’ve been able to deadlift was I think 80 or 90 lbs, but I already count that as an achievement since I weigh around that much anyway. What's your opinion on incest? Big yikes. Some memes can be hilarious but when you think about how incest will sometimes come from a place of sexual abuse within the family, it stops being funny so I’d rather take it seriously like 98% of the time. Do you have a favorite color for cats? Mmm I think orange is really cute. The few cats that have been nice to me are usually the orange ones. What was your latest email about? It’s an email from a transcribing website inviting me to their Slack. Since I can’t get a legit job for now, Gab let me know about these websites that’ll let you do some transcribing and pay you a few cents (around ₱15-20) for each of them. One of the sites I joined, whose test I passed, invited me to their Slack earlier today so I can be a part of the team. I’m still feeling too anxious to join the group so I haven’t addressed it for now, but maybe by tonight or tomorrow. What video games did you play when you were younger? Our parents weren’t too strict when it came to video game supervision so we were already playing Grand Theft Auto, Silent Hil, Resident Evil, etc. as kids. Those games eventually ended up being my favorites. I liked other less-violent games too, like games from the Burnout franchise, The Simpsons: Hit and Run and that one Spongebob video game based on the first Spongebob movie hehe.

Would you ever get a tramp stamp? That’s not really a place where I’d like to get a tattoo. I want it to be somewhere I can constantly see, like my fingers or wrist. Do you like Lady Gaga? Yeah. It has a sentimental point to it too because she’s essentially a part of the root of mine and Gabie’s friendship. When we first met I was heavily into Beyoncé and she, into Gaga. Telephone was still a super popular song then and people were really into the Bey-Gaga duo, so it was the perfect recipe for a friendship to form. We make it a point to like each other’s bias so she’s caught up with Beyoncé’s new material and I also always support Gaga’s. What's your favorite commercial? I love the sports car ad of Fita and the ‘First Love’ McDonald’s ad. Jollibee’s Valentine’s Day ads have also been pretty gut-wrenching in the last few years. Did you cry when Michael Jackson died? I didn’t, but by then I already knew how big of a star he was because of how much Beyoncé hyped him up before he passed lol. It was also easy to understand that it was a big deal because the news covered his death and funeral for hourssss during that week. What does the last notification you received say? “home” Gab drove out to run some errands and I asked her to let me know when she gets home, because the weather isn’t looking good. What's the ugliest species of animal? Cockroaches. Are you embarrassed about any songs on your iPod? I wasn’t embarrassed over the punk bands I listened to but I knew my classmates weren’t going to understand my taste and possibly ostracize me even more than I already was, so I kept my punk playlist all to myself. Who is on your Top Friends? I don’t have Myspace but Facebook ranks friends based on how much you interact with them and my top 5 are Angela, Gabie, Mils, Alique, and Andrew. What do you use to listen to music on the computer? Spotify.  Do people know a lot about you? You guys sure do. But yeah when it comes to irl people I wear my heart on my sleeve, too. What was the last thing you said out loud? “That’s enough for now.”  Do you miss anybody? Of course. All my friends. More than ever. Have you ever heard the song What A Wonderful World? Yes, though I think I may have only ever heard the chorus since that’s the most-played part of the song. Who was the last person you said I Love You to? Gabie. Have you ever deleted someone off of Facebook? I’ve unfriended countless people and blocked a handful of others. Do you have any bug bites right now? No. Puppy bites, yes. Have you ever been burned? My finger has. When I was 7 I stupidly laid a finger on a clothes iron that was plugged in. My grandma had been using it but she left for a while to do a task. It’s still up there on the stupidest things I’ve ever done. Who was your last inbox message from? It’s the same message from Gab I mentioned earlier. Would you ever consider being a critic? Nah. Analyzing works of art has never been my strong suit. I once had to keep a movie review blog as one of the requirements for my Film 100 class and I honestly found it difficult. Being a critic requires rich knowledge on anything and everything you’re critiquing, and I don’t know if I’m well-versed enough for that. I just want to enjoy my films, dude. Same goes for TV shows, paintings, food, poems, etc. Who was the last person you slept beside? Gab probs, but it’s been a while. Do you like Metallica? I loved For Whom the Bell Tolls from the very first second I heard it, which was when Triple H used it as his entrance song from one of the recent-ish Wrestlemanias. Other than that, I’m not familiar with their music.

What's your favorite kind of soup? Miso! What’s your best friend's favorite band? Angela loves The Maine. I know Gab doesn’t pick a favorite anything. Who was the last person you IMed? Again, Gabie. Have you ever heard of the band Thin Lizzy? Nope. Who was the last person you took a picture with? I haven’t had a photo with anyone in a while, but I want to guess that it’s my family. Do you play Guitar Hero? I used to. But I always preferred Rock Band because I really liked the concept of switching from one instrument to another. Do you play any real instruments? No. What are un-real instruments lol Where are your siblings right now? They’re both in the living room. Whose house did you last visit? My grandma’s house, aka the house where we used to live. My uncle baked me a tres leches cake as a graduation gift so I briefly came over to pick it up :) Since I was already there, my grandma also gave me a portion of the lengua she had made for dinner.  Who was the last person to come to your house? ^ Same grandma, and my cousin. They went over to meet Cooper and to do a lot of catching up. What time do you usually eat dinner? 7-7:30 in the evening. Have you ever searched your own house on Google Earth? Hahaha yeah, I think most of us have at one point. I also looked up myo old school when I was still studying there. Does it bother you when people have a loose grip on hugs? No. I know some people aren’t the most comfortable with hugs. Are you looking forward to next year? If I can be promised that the virus will be gone by 2021, then hell yes. What have you done so far this summer? This has been one long-ass summer...I’ve finished my thesis, relinquished my duties as VP for my org, owned a puppy, gotten sick for the first time in years, seen my girlfriend once in four months, cooked something from scratch for the first time, and tried to apply for simple side jobs over the interwebs. Do you have a common name or uncommon? It’s kinda in the middle? It’s not a unique name, but it’s also not a very popular choice. What's your favorite punk band? Against Me! I have my other fave punk bands but none has done it for me the way AM! has.

[mirohed]

kim seunghun | love me, love me not

pairing: kim seunghun + gender neutral reader

wc: 3.7k

genre: hanahaki au + angst 

synopsis: daffodils represent unrequited love. is that why you keep coughing them up?

warnings: implications of suggestive content, descriptions of illness (and mention of surgery), mention of alcohol

playlist: love me, love me not.

a/n: happy birthday to me!! im glad i finally got to finish and post this (its,,, been in my wips since at least february LMAO) !! they prob wont read this but i wanted to thank my irls for dealing w me and my kpop bullshit (esp bc none of them stan ygtb 😔)

It's getting worse.

Your knuckles turn white, gripping the porcelain of the toilet. Tears and blood alike fall into the bowl, disturbing the gentle peace of the water. You pound at your chest, the action causing you to hack up yellow daffodil petals stained suspicious red. It's a monotonous process at this point. Pound. Cough. Pound. Cough. Repeat until the damned coughing stops.

It takes ten minutes before you return to normal. Or at least as normal as you can get. You got lucky this time.

You watch the petals spiral downward into the gaping hole in the toilet and get flushed away.

Being with Seunghun wasn't always accompanied by a tightness in your chest and petals tickling your throat.

june 19, 2005; 2:52 PM.

"I wanna grow up," you had grumbled, your hands squeezed around the chains of the swingset. You and Seunghun had been riding your bikes for the first time since getting the training wheels off. You had sped down a hill ("First one down’s a rotten egg!") and lost control, falling off and scraping your knee on the pavement. He rushed you to your parents' house, supporting your weight with an arm around your waist. The two of you had settled for playing on the swingset in your backyard instead.

"Me too," he said. "I think." He'd been rocking forward and backward on the swing, eyes focused on the blades of grass underfoot.

"You think?"

"I don't know." You stayed silent, trying to gain as much height as possible with your uninjured leg. "I don't wanna grow up and stop being friends." That got you to stop right in your tracks, your leg planted on the ground.

"What?" You sent an incredulous look his way. "Why would we stop being friends?"

He had let go of the swing, his hands finding his lap. "Some of the older kids stopped being friends when they grew up," he mumbled. "I don't wanna stop being friends, but neither did they..."

You got off the swing, limping over to him and wrapping Seunghun in the biggest hug your six-year-old arms could muster.

"We're gonna be best friends forever. Don't forget that."

"Best friends forever." If he wrapped his arms tighter around you then, you didn’t pick up on it.

[09:54 PM] huniebee🐝: i had fun today :^))

[09:54 PM] huniebee🐝: i wanna adopt a puppy!!

[09:55 PM] huniebee🐝: will you promise to help me take care of it

You brighten as the messages come in, your phone's vibrations distracting you from the way your throat clogs.

[09:56 PM] you: ofc

[09:56 PM] you: well be the best puppy parents the worlds ever seen

[09:57 PM] huniebee🐝: wait i need to send the pics from the pet shelter

[Attachment: 8 images]

You save each picture, cooing over the puppies you got to meet. This time, you only get a precious few minutes of relative clarity before things get too distracting to ignore. You return to the bathroom with a resigned sigh that devolves into a fit of coughs.

You cough and retch and cough some more. By the time you're done, there are less petals and more blood in the toilet bowl. Your chest still feels full of something you can't quite spit out.

Then you hack up something new: a bloody stem with wet flowers still attached.

There's nothing left to do but cry, your whole body wracked with pain both physical and emotional.

august 29, 2011; 3:15 PM.

"Today was fun," you said, making yourself right at home on Seunghun's bed. Your new backpack hadn't lasted more than a couple minutes in his house before getting neglected on his carpet. Your best friend hummed in acknowledgement, already sitting at his desk with his workbook out. "I'm glad we got to meet some new people," you continued, "but that Hyunsuk guy? Seems like a major pain in the ass."

"Give him a chance."

"I know, I know. I will. But still," you huffed, “it was his first day too. No need to act like a know-it-all."

"I know. But it's the first day. Maybe he'll even himself out with time."

The conversation ended there, and you spent some time staring at his ceiling fan, the blades going round and round in a big, beautiful blur. Before long, you had grown bored, looking over at him only to see his pencil flying across the paper.

"Hey. Let's go to the mall and get pretzels." Seunghun spun around to face you, a foot stopping his chair from going too far.

"Sure," he gave a placid smile. "Do your work first."

You groaned as loudly as you could, sounding much like a petulant child straight out of elementary school. (Which was more or less the truth, but you thought you were better than that.) After a few minutes of uninterrupted whining and failing to get Seunghun to break, you spoke up. "Why do I need to do my work? You're Mr. Hardworking, Mr. Teacher's Pet."

"We're in middle school now," he had said, and you remember thinking you were in for a long lecture, "and pretty soon, we're gonna have to go to high school and take entrance exams and decide which university we want to go to and..." He averted his gaze, put down his pen. "We need to start growing up."

"We're still young," you reasoned, sitting up and letting your legs dangle off the side of his bed. "If anything, this is our time to experience things and, you know, make mistakes before we become adults!"

He was silent for a few long, agonizing moments, long enough to make you think you'd won. The pretzels were within reach; all you had to do was ask for them.

"I call a compromise."

Shit. Compromises were common in your friendship. Seunghun was always a little too good at stopping you from making stupid decisions. The worst part was that you could never argue with them. "We go to the mall to get pretzels—my treat—if, and only if, you do your work. We don't go until we're both finished. Deal?"

You opened your mouth, determined to pick the proposal apart, but his reasoning was (unpleasant, yet) bulletproof. Instead, you reached for your backpack with a heavy sigh. "First of all, fuck you. Second of all," you said, tugging your own workbook out, "you're impossible."

"I know. Do your work."

"Fine."

The math problems had been difficult, definitely harder than you were used to, but doable. If anything, the greasy mall pretzels that were way too salty to be healthy made it all worth it.

Seunghun gets understandably very worried when you text him from the hospital, but he comes to see you nonetheless. In his arms is a bouquet of daffodils.

"They symbolize friendship," he says, setting it down on the table next to you. You stare at the pristine yellow petals and flatten your lips in a tight smile. How ironic, you think, that he doesn't know they also symbolize unrequited love.

"The doctors wouldn't tell me why you're here. Classified information, they said." That much is true; nor much is known about the disease outside of shitty romance movies with unrealistically happy endings. Seunghun always believed in them. You never did.

You don't think your story's gonna have a happy ending.

You didn't want him to know anyway, lest he worry. (And you don't want to think about what would happen to your friendship if he found out he was the cause of it all.) "You don't have to tell me," he begins, sitting himself down on one of those rigid hospital chairs, "I just wanna know if it's bad. Like, well...you know.” He lowers his voice to a whisper. “Terminal."

"Like if I'm gonna die?"

"Yeah," he rubs the nape of his neck, a bit abashed, "more or less."

"I don't know. Sure hope not," you chuckle. That brings on a coughing fit, and Seunghun looks on, brows knit together. He moves close to offer what little comfort he can, but you hold your hand up to stop him; having him near will only make things worse.

Petals threaten to spill out of your mouth, and panic bubbles in your chest when he asks if you're okay. Your doctor, bless her, chooses that moment to enter. She shooes him out "to speak to you in private." Seunghun, to his credit, obliges and flashes you a smile and a thumbs-up as he goes. You try to mirror his expression (and hope your smile isn't more of a grimace).

The door closes behind him with a soft click. "Friend of yours?" the doctor asks.

You spit the blood-stained petals into your hand, your doctor graciously looking the other way as you toss them into the trash. "You could say that."

october 4, 2013; 5:11 PM.

You tugged at your clothing, feeling more than a little uncomfortable as you waited for your best friend to show up. The DJ, a former student, was already hard at work inside the gym. You heard the bass-boosted beginning of the Cupid Shuffle and shot a frantic text to Seunghun.

[05:11 PM] you: holy shit theyre playing the cupid shuffle can you PLEASE hurry up

[05:12 PM] you: idc if this is our first homecoming you better get your ass over here

[05:12 PM] huniebee🐝: give me like two minutes!!

[05:12 PM] you: THE SONGS GONNA BE OVER IN 2 MIN

"Are you waiting for Seunghun?" Hyunsuk had asked, tie already loosened. You two had gotten close—not as close as you and Seunghun, of course—this year as a result of having classes together. You wondered why you ever hated him.

"Yeah. He won't be too late, thank God, but I'm pissed we're missing the Cupid Shuffle. What about you? I remember you bragging all week about 'flexing your dance skills in front of the ladies.' Or are you all talk, as usual?"

"You know, it's almost like you don't want me to wait with you."

You had laughed, knocking your shoulder into his. The chatter kept up for a minute or two before he made his leave. ("Well, it's time for me to flex my dance muscles in front of the seniors," he chuckled, giving you a salute as he walked off.)

"I'm here! God, I can't believe I missed the Cupid Shuffle," Seunghun said, head hung low. You began to feel a little self-conscious; you were feeling out of place in your semi-formal outfit, yet he looked right at home in his dress shirt.

Chasing those thoughts away, you grinned. "You're here now, aren't you? Come on." You took his hand and dragged him into the gym.

You don't talk to Seunghun or to Hyunsuk after that. You're not sure if you should tell Hyunsuk about the whole situation when he texts you. Seunghun must have told him something was up, of course, and he's insightful enough, sensitive enough (when he wants to be), but you worry. You're afraid he'll open his big mouth. Instead, you send a few messages to your best friend.

[04:29 AM] you: hey

[04:29 AM] you: i just wanted to say in advance that im sorry

[04:29 AM] you: im so so sorry for everything ive done and for what im about to do

There's one last message in the text box, daring you to send it. "I'm sorry I love you," you whisper instead, deleting the message before you do something you’ll regret. To seal the deal, you tap through a few menus until you reach his contact. The picture you've assigned to him is one you took; he's about to take a big bite of cotton candy bigger than his head.

With a heavy heart (though you hope it’s just the weight of the daffodils in your chest), you block his contact. It's better this way. It has to be.

Your doctor said you could get rid of the thick, thorned vines with a vicegrip around your heart and lungs, could pluck the flowers that threaten to spill out at the mere thought of your best friend.

The biggest side effect of it all, she told you, was that you'd forget all about Kim Seunghun. So you steel yourself.

The last thing you think about before they insert the thin needle of anesthesia in your veins is Seunghun's smile, and how you'll never see it in person again.

And how even if you did, you wouldn't remember it as the grin from the boy you love.

october 4, 2013; 9:16 PM.

The frenetic strobe lighting in the gym slowed to a stop, having been replaced with a spotlight making lazy rounds through the gym.

You knew that marked the beginning of a slow song, and dragged Seunghun off the floor in search of some punch. He seemed to have different plans, tugging you back on the floor and pulling you flush against him.

"Where are you going?" he had asked. "You're the one who wanted to dance the night away." His hands found your waist, yours instinctively folding behind his neck. You had wanted to say something about how that claim was void now; he was the one that made you miss the Cupid Shuffle, but the words get extinguished when you look at him.

It was just like that time you practiced in fifth grade, but you swore there was something different about tonight and the way you swayed. You thought back to your practice session in fifth grade, how you had stepped on each other's feet, how you spent the whole time laughing. (For the record, it wasn't for any lack of balance; you started it, laughing as he cried out before he stomped on your toe.)

There was no laughing during the song. Everything was vibrant and deafening and there all at once. But at the same time, it was like everything had been stripped away. Everything but you and Seunghun.

Things changed after that. You were left with a dizzying, free-fall sort of feeling that picked up with each glance at your best friend. Almost every butterfly in the world was taking current residency in your stomach, making you feel light as your body moved to the music. Before long, there was something lodged at the back of your throat, nudging its way forward.

"I'm gonna go to the bathroom real quick," you said, a particularly heavy cough bringing the mysterious lump to your mouth.

Running your tongue along the smooth texture of the lump (okay, so not phlegm), you spat the offending object into the sink: a single yellow petal, coated in saliva.

You blinked.

Blinked again.

"Oh, what the fuck," you muttered, unlocking your phone. One quick Google search later—why the fuck am i coughing up flowers—you found an answer.

Flora mortem. You were loath to believe WebMD, of all things, but you found yourself tapping the link regardless. There was another term for the rare disease: Hanahaki.

Revising your search query was a mistake. The first result was the "hanahaki" tag on Tumblr, which showed nothing but models with tears in their eyes and bloodied flowers in their mouths. Yikes.

You made your way back to the party after that, but lingering in the back of your mind was the cause of the disease: a severe case of unrequited love.

There is only one definite cure for Hanahaki Disease: having the object of the afflicted's affections return their feelings.

You almost manage to purge the petal and the stupid WebMD page from your mind for the rest of the night.

Almost.

You wake up hours later. It's a little disorienting, sure, to come to with little memory of what landed you in the hospital. You peek under the oversized hospital gown to see bandages over your chest, get tempted to rip the IV drip from your arm. The doctor comes in right before you make a move on the needle. She tells you all about how the flowers in your lungs are gone for good.

"You're saved. But the final test," she says, pulling a phone from her pocket, "is this. Do you recognize the people in this picture?"

You recognize yourself next to a boy you don't know. His hand's around your waist, pulling you close. You wear matching grins. Given the way you're both dressed, you suspect the picture's from your freshman year's homecoming dance. Weird. Memory's kinda fuzzy from that night.

"Yeah. Myself. I don't know the other guy. Am I supposed to?"

"No. You're not. Congratulations," she smiles, placing a hand on your shoulder. "You're cured."

You look through all the old messages and pictures when you have some time to yourself. You reach out for the memory, the feeling of knowing Kim Seunghun. You get nothing, and while your brain knows something's wrong, you're more concerned about being able to breathe easy.

You move to a new city, far, far away from the place you grew up in. You finish your last year of high school, get a job, start college. You make new memories with new people. You forget all about Kim Seunghun.

It gets easy to forget that you weren't born with the ugly faded red scars that run up and down your chest. It's your only remaining tie to the man you loved so much you almost let yourself wither away. You think it's a good thing you cut him off; why stick around, why force yourself to suffer, for someone who doesn't love you back? Why be with someone if it physically hurts to stay by their side?

But sometimes you wonder. What happened? What happened to him after his best friend walked out of his life for good with no explanation?

Those days are never good. You distract yourself then, often with the familiar kick of alcohol burning in the back of your throat. You've never been much of a drinker, but you figure it's never too late to start.

Sometimes, the distraction comes from being in the arms of another.

(One of your favorite distractions, a young man named Byounggon, had run his fingers along the angry lines one night, jotting them down in his map of your body.

"Do you regret it?" he asked then, eyes half-lidded with drowsiness. You cupped his cheek, ran a thumb along the planes of his face.

"I wouldn't be here if I regretted it, now would I?" He let the corners of his mouth turn up just so, pressing his lips to yours.

You don't talk to him much nowadays, your interactions reduced to likes on Instagram, views on Snapchat. He's moved to a bigger city. "More opportunities," he said. You keep up with his dream of being a musician, always. There was a time when you were his number one supporter, after all.)

"Will that be all?" the cashier asks, jotting your order on the plastic cup. When you nod, he asks for your name. He jots that down too.

But then his eyes widen and he looks at you with renewed interest. "I'm sorry?"

"Is there a problem?" you asks, peering at your name (spelled correctly) on the cup. His eyes search for an answer within yours, some sort of explanation you can't seem to give. He averts his gaze, shakes his head, places your cup in the queue of orders.

"I'm sorry," he says. "Just thought you were someone I knew. Have a nice day." You parrot the phrase, catching a glimpse of the young man's name tag.

Seunghun, it reads in cheerful yellow. There's a doodle of a puppy in the top right corner. You think it's rather cute.

Two weeks later, you meet Seunghun again. This time, you're out for a morning jog. The crisp autumn air greets you as your feet meet the pavement and let out a satisfactory crunch under the burnt orange leaves on the sidewalk.

You both get stopped at the crosswalk, waiting for the light to change. While you catch your breath, you don't miss the way he flinches, as though he didn't expect you to show up. He schools his expression into something friendly within no time, and you wonder if you imagined the whole thing.

"The weather's nice, isn't it?"

"It is," you pant. "On your way to work?" He raises a hand to tug at the strap of his backpack with a small smile.

"Yeah. You should come by, give us business," he grins. "On mornings like this, I recommend the hazelnut latte." You hum in agreement, not yet recovered enough to converse. "Tell you what, you come and get one when I'm working, I'll make sure it's on the house."

"Really? Maybe I'll swing by." The light changes, and you leave Seunghun behind, waving goodbye as you do.

You come in later that day, ordering a hazelnut latte as promised. Seunghun's manning the register, same as two weeks ago, and when he takes everything down, he smiles. You miss it as you pay, but there's something extra on your cup.

As you take a sip of the (delicious; his coworker Yedam must be some sort of brewing prodigy) latte, you catch a glimpse of the extra writing.

Along the side of the cup is his phone number.

[10:58 PM] seunghun!: more than anything i want to adopt a puppy

[10:59 PM] seunghun!: or rather another one

[10:59 PM] seunghun!: i named this one after an old friend

[Attachment: 1 image]

The picture of Seunghun and his dog brings a smile to your face. You've been spending more time with him recently, whether it be going on coffee runs ("Are you sure you're not just using me for my employee discount?") or complaining about life as a broke college student ("My card got declined trying to buy a bag of chips last night...").

It's nice. Spending time with him is...nice.

It's more than a simple distraction, somebody to hold close on nights your decisions try to haunt you. It’s friendship, something to hold onto when you lose your way in the dense forest of your mind and to cherish when you manage to make it to a clearing and bask in the sunshine.

You've caught a cold recently (probably from that bastard Seo Changbin in your communications class). Seunghun's given you some homemade tea, swearing on its usefulness. It certainly tastes good, the sweet honey chased by tangy lemon. Unfortunately, the tea isn't able to stop the persistent cough you've been plagued with.

Feeling phlegm start to come up, you turn the bathroom lights on, hacking it up and spitting into the sink.

Huh. That's weird.

There's no phlegm.

The only thing in the sink is a single golden petal, coated in saliva.

[thewritingstar]

1-70 please 🐰

Alright after many requests, another round of questions that I will fully answer!

Yall better enjoy!

Also sorry of these are plain answers 

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents?

-For the most part02: Who did you last say “I love you” to?

-My mom03: Do you regret anything?

-yeah staying up until 3 04: Are you insecure?

-yeah but im trying to be more confident 05: What is your relationship status?

-Single06: How do you want to die?

-Happy or with a guillotine 07: What did you last eat?

-A strawberry salad from Panera and three pieces of bread08: Played any sports?

-Soccer when I was like 7 and then theater when i was in middle school09: Do you bite your nails?

-hehe ye10: When was your last physical fight?

-prob when i was younger with my sis11: Do you like someone?

-...no12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours?

-No but I did stay up hella late last night and regret it 13: Do you hate anyone at the moment?

-ehhh no not really14: Do you miss someone?

- My friends since I haven't seen them in a while15: Have any pets?

-two dogs and one has a pink tail16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment?

-sick and nasty17: Ever made out in the bathroom?

-nope18: Are you scared of spiders?

-yes very much 19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance?

-possibly but it depends where20: Where was the last place you snogged someone?

-never21: What are your plans for this weekend?

-working and homework22: Do you want to have kids? How many?

-I want puppies as my children and maybe two23: Do you have piercings? How many?

-Just my earlobes24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)?

-art and history25: Do you miss anyone from your past?

-Some friends i would like to reconnect with26: What are you craving right now?

-Strawberry Shortcake27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart?

-not that I know of28: Have you ever been cheated on?

-never been in a relationship29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?

-never had one30: What’s irritating you right now?

-me being sick31: Does somebody love you?

-who doesn’t 32: What is your favourite color?

-black, blue, purple33: Do you have trust issues?

-im a little toooo trusting, but if you fuck with me then it goes away fast34: Who/what was your last dream about?

-I legit cant remember 35: Who was the last person you cried in front of?

-my mirror36: Do you give out second chances too easily?

-depends, haven’t had too37: Is it easier to forgive or forget?

-forget is easier but sometimes we need to forgive, unless they took your petpetpark membership38: Is this year the best year of your life?

-Ya know, it might be 39: How old were you when you had your first kiss?

-hahhahaha my what?40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked?

-when i was younger yeah51: Favourite food?

-Chow Mein, Pasta, Steak

52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason?

-Ye53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night?

-Panic and cry over my essay that i didnt even have to write54: Is cheating ever okay?

-No. I get that people fall apart but cheating is such a low and I dont understand how anyone could do that to someone55: Are you mean?

-If i need to be, but i am a very nice and sweet person56: How many people have you fist fought?

-lol none57: Do you believe in true love?

-yes58: Favourite weather?

-A nice warm day for shorts 59: Do you like the snow?

-when im inside sure60: Do you wanna get married?

-yes, i have plans for my wedding already lol61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby?

-endearments are always welcome62: What makes you happy?

-alot of things.63: Would you change your name?

-nope64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed?

-i just gave my puppy a kiss so no

65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

-well 66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around?

-yes67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to?

-My friend Jared. I asked him why he put his hand on the roof of his car when he drives and he said cause hes a baller. 68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

-It wasn’t super deep but prob this morning with @flowerboyorchid69: Do you believe in soulmates?

-yes, platonic and romantic 70: Is there anyone you would die for?

-prob my friends

----

hope you enjoyed

[memoriesthatkeepyounear]

150 Random Questions

1.) What’s better, having high expectations or having low expectations?

 Low lmao

2.) Would you rather go without junk food for a year or go without TV for a year?

 junk food

3.) Describe your perfect man/woman.

Tall, funny, weird, silly,serious,optimistic,driven,adventuous, list goes on

4.) Thoughts on school dress codes?

they’re honestly stupid and degrading but some are necessary

5.)Any strange phobias?

Not that i can think of

6.) At what job do you see Donald Trump best fit?

6 feet underground 

7.) Who was your first crush?

NIck Jonas lmao

8.) Who was your first best friend?

Girl named Morgan don’t remember her last name.

9.)What is one weird thing about you?

I hate when I have an uneven amount of tattoos.

10.) Top 5 TV shows you like to watch?

11.) What are your favorite boys names? Degrassi, Greys Anatomy,TVD,Black Mirror

12.) What are your favorite girls names? Marley,Tasha idk i dont really have any lol

13.) Do you have any tattoos? If so, what are they? Yes, there’s too many to name each one lmao

14.) Do you plan on getting (more) tattoos? If so, what do you want to get as of the moment? yes many mor, next one is an alien head with a space ship and UFO.

15.) Do you have any piercings? Do you plan on getting more? i mean just my ears and eh maybe

16.) Do you like hugging people?

eh i could live without hugs tbh lol

17.) Think of ANY person on earth right now.  Who did you think of? you don’t want to know (CB)

18.) Do you have an iPhone? yes iphone 8 plus

19.) What is the worst thing that could happen in your life right now? losing one of my jobs lmao

20.) Do you watch anime? no

21.) What brings true happiness? music,traveling,friends,concerts.

22.) What is the most expensive thing you’ve ever paid for? honestly, i dont know i dont remember

23.) If you could have any job in the world and get paid millions of dollars a year for it, what would you be and why? tour manager or selling merch for a band

24.) Do you want children? If so, how many? honestly no but if i had to have children probably 1 or 2

25.) Name and describe someone who you feel most comfortable around. I’ll just name them, Pape, Chase, Michele, Destany,Chris,  Zion, Mary,Tori, Alyssa

26.)If you could invent a holiday, what would it be? Corbyn Besson Day just because LMAO

27.)Would you rather have summer weather or winter weather all year round? This isn’t a choice but spring weather

28.) If you could make an alien race, describe what they would look like. they would look like an alien racing, obviously.

29.)  What was the first thing you learned to cook? Grilled Cheese

30.) Describe your sense of humor. I’m funny as fuuuuck. I’ll send memes, stupid random shit i can think if, anything.

31.) What is the key to happiness? Surrounding yourself with positivity, and trying to find the positive out of anything negative that happens. Not worrying what other people think of you except yourself. Surrounding yourself with good people

32.) How many phone numbers do you have committed to memory? Whose numbers are they? One of my sisters, both my parents, thats about it lmao

33.) Name three songs that make you want to dance. Dazed adn Confused-Jake Miller, Mojo-Round2Crew,something different-wdw

34.) What job did you want to have as a child? Vet Technician

35.) Do you have any talents or skills? My talent is getting all the rings in the ring game on toontown

36.) What was the worst punishment you’ve ever had? I got grounded for a month-dont remember what i did tho

37.) Did you ever do anything weird as a child? Oh im sure i did.

38.) What is your dream car? a car that doesn’t break down

39.)  Describe something that made you laugh this week. probably something corbyn did or sue or my friends

40.) Did you have a dream last night? If so, describe it. Yes and i”d rather not lmao

41.)  Do you ever have repetitive dreams? Describe it/them. oh yes and u don’t want to hear that either

42.) Describe the worst/ scariest dream you’ve ever had. I’ll always remember this--I was younger maybe like 11 and it was that my dad went psychotic and my sisters and her friends snuck outside and tried to get away but he found us, threw us in his car and had my neighbors at the time help him kill us idk bro it was wild. thats the short version.

43.) Describe the best dream you’ve ever had. there’s so many and no thank you

44.) If God himself gave you a choice of either having unlimited money for the rest of your life or finding your one true love starting tomorrow, which one would you choose (keep in mind, you are still able to make a ton of money if you choose love, and you are still able to meet your soul mate if you choose money)? probably finding my one true love-thats worth more than any amount of money

45.) If you could do anything (and I mean ANYTHING) right now without consequences, what would you do and why? honestly i dont know

46.) Do you have any recipes that you know off the top of your head? What is it/ what are they? yes, how to make whipped cream lmao 

47.) Do you have your license? If so, do you have a car? no

48.) Have you ever had a near death experience? yes

49.) Do you personally know anyone that has been to prison? yes

50.) Have you ever been in a physical fight?

yes.

51.) When you get out of the shower, do you towel dry, blow dry, or air dry your hair? depends, if im not leaving the house i towel dry and then air dry but if i have to look good i blow dry.

52.) When you go to the movies, what snacks and drinks do you take with you? candy, popcorn, soda or an icee

53.) Do you like going to the beach? If so, do you like to stay dry or go in the water? If not, why? i like goigng to the beach adn going in the water, i hate sand

54.) Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?

sometimes.

55.) If you could have a superpower ASIDE from being invisible or being able to fly, what would you have? reading minds.

56.) If you were able to live for however long you wanted to (i’m talking thousands of years without aging), when would you choose to die? in this moment tomorrow lmao

57.) What do you think happens after you die? the light you go into is really the light when ur leaving the womb and your soul goes into a baby just beig born

58.) Do you believe in aliens? yes

59.) Do you believe in ghosts? yes

60.) Do you believe in spiritual things like ouija boards, tarot cards, and crystals? Do you believe they are portals for evil entities to enter the mortal world? yes

61.) If you could make one mythical being real, who/what would you make?

i dont know

62.) Do you get tan, or do you burn? the first time i tan, i burn the rest of the time i tan

63.) Describe your shower routine. I get in, shampoo, shave, rinse, conditioner, exfoliate sometimes, and body wash then rise hair and get out

64.) Do you enjoy school? Why or why not? Im not in school

65.) In your opinion, what is the worst way to die? struggling 

66.) Do you get carsick, sea sick, or airplane sickness? no

67.) What’s one memory that you wish you could live again and again? probs seeing one direction lmao i miss them

68.) What were some of your stuffed animal’s names from when you were a kid? scraper-he was a dog i still have him

69.)Do you have any pets? no

70.) Describe your daily wardrobe. homeless

71.)  Describe what your daily wardrobe would be if you were rich. beautiful,with the trends

72.)  Create a character right now.  Give them a name, age, and character description. Jessica Arkansas from Ohio, 22, makes youtube videos, fun when drunk,funny,works alot, drinks alot, smokes weed sometimes, love making people happy.

73.)What was the last thing you bought? Aromatherapy sleep lotion and shower gel from bath and body works.

74.) Have you ever bought a CD? What band was it for? uh yes I have many CDs, jonas brothers

75.) Describe your perfect ice cream sundae. the traditional one

76.) If you could make ANYTHING happen right now with no cost, trouble, or obstacles, what would you do? make corbyn besson fall in love with me

77.) What are some of your favorite physical activities to do? hiking, walking, going ton the gym

78.) What were some of your favorite shows as a child? Dragon tales, The Amanda show, hannah montana, thats so raven, wizards of waverly place, jonas,little bear, oswald. theres much more

79.) Describe how you would survive the zombie apocalypse. I wouldn’t

80.)What are some things you shouldn’t say at work? anything unprofessional

81.) If you were told that if you killed someone, you would save 100 people, would you do it? depends who the person im killig is (if its ****** or ********* then absolutely)

82.) How’s the weather right now? cold

83.) What is the background on your cell phone right now? its flowers that gnash tweeted one time when he released the broken hearts club

84.)Is it better to work at a job that you love or a job that pays well? a job you love.

85.) What do you have within arms reach of your bed? my stuffed giraffes.

86.) Have you ever been fired from a job? If so, why? no

87.) Have you ever won a trophy, prize, or medal? If so, for what? yes many, for soccer

88.) Do you have any posters, pictures, or art hanging on your walls in your room? If so, what are they? I have 1 poster and its corbyn and then i gave 2 2019 calendars one is jake millers and the other is a friends tv show one and i have hats on tacs hanging, poloroid pictures and a giant s for my name

89.) Are you afraid of the dark? If so, why? yes, because the dark is mf scary

90.)What is something that you’ve never done but would like to try? sky diving or parasailing

91.) If you could choose three famous people or characters to be friends with, who would you choose and why? wdw bc why not and they cool, the cast of friends because they are me and i love them, niall horan bc hes the loml

92.) Do you smile at strangers when you pass by them on the street? sometimes

93.) Do you have a favorite TV commercial? If so, what is it? no

94.) Do you like your handwriting? no

95.) Cable TV or Netflix? netflix

96.) What are your favorite smells? beautiful day from bbw

97.) Do you consider yourself physically strong? no im a weak ass bitch

98.) Describe a time where you said something really rude or mean, whether intentional or not.

oh there are mnay times im a bitch

99.) Do you ask strangers to pet their dogs? yes

100.)What is your most embarrassing moment?

wasn’t even my fault but when a group of drunk girls mauled me down a flight of stairs in front of people and DIDN’T EVEN NOTICE LMAO also whe I tripped at my high school graduaton going to get my diploma.

101.) Has anyone really close to you ever died? If so, who was it and how did you handle it?

yes, my uncle and i did not handle it well.

102.)  Describe your plan of action if you were home alone and you heard someone break into your house.

Lock myself in a room and call 911 or fight them lmao

103.) If you were to be born again, would you want to be born male or female?

probs male

104.)  What shampoo do you use?

the cheapest one i can find

105.) Guess the meaning of this word: ulotrichous.

I dont even know where to start lmao definitely a phobia for something maybe

106.) Do you let messages (phone, email, text, social media, etc…) build up, or do you have to look at them right away?

texts i let build but everythig else i dont

107.)  Where is the nearest McDonalds to your house?

on the other side of town like 5 mins away

108.)  If you had $1 billion and you had to spend it in exactly one week, what would you spend it on?

makeup, concerts tickets, plane tickets, clothes, alcohol,food.

109.) What is the best thing you’ve ever eaten?

pasta for sure

110.) If you could go on a trip around the world with up to three people, who would you bring (they can be people you know personally or famous people).

Michele, Zion, thats about it lmao

111.) What expletive/ explicit phrase do you say most often?

fuck off i guess

112.) What is your personal definition of success?

happy with yourself, your job, your life as a whole

113.) How was your day today?

it was good, tiring.

114.) What is the closest Big City you live by?

hartford or probably new york

115.) Have you ever been in a car accident?

no

116.) Do you hide anything from your parents?

yes

117.) If you could possess one talent, what would you be able to do?

sing or dance.

118.) Ugly and smart or beautiful and stupid?

ufgly and smart

119.) What is the worst thing you’ve ever seen in real life?

i dont know

120.) Use only 3 words to describe how you want your future to go.

happy, imperfectly perfect and promising.

121.) QUICK! give me a few things a brick could be useful for

hitting myself in the head

122.) If you could make a dream society, describe it in great detail where it would be, who would be in it, and what rules there would be?

somewhere warm, my friends/favorite artists, no negativity, everything is free, the artists who live there HAVE to perform every other weekend.

123.) If you could make any animal miniature, what would you make and why?

giraffes so in can have one as a pet,

124.) What are your favorite candle scents?

salted caramel, flannel, vanilla bean noel, champagne toast, hot cocoa and cream,endless weekend

125.) If you HAD to have one plastic surgery, what would you get and why?

something to make me skinnier

126.) Do you prefer to hang out with the same sex or the opposite sex?

opposite--less drama.

127.) If you could make a charity, what would the profits go towards? How would you raise money for it?

animals,homeless people, children

128.) Describe the body you wish you had.

just a flatter stomach and thinner thighs

129.) If you were a famous director, what would your next movie be about? Describe the plot, characters, and possible title.

probs a romcom or a romance movie--to tired to make a plot

130.) If only women were to rule the world, how different would the world be by 2050?

very probably better tho

131.) What is your favorite alcoholic drink?

jack and coke.

132.) Do you have a problematic friend?

doesn;t everyone?

133.) Are you more spontaneous or more of a planner?

spontaneous

134.) If you could change your full name, what would your name be?

idk

135.) What is one song that describes your life?

probably wait for you by jake miller or invisible by anna clendending

136.) What is one show you’ve been meaning to watch but can never find the time for?

all of the ones in my list

137.) Do you find it easy to drop toxic people from your life that you’ve known for a long time?

yes

138.) Do you like children? Why or why not?

yes bc they’re cute af and funny and honest

139.) What is your zodiac sign?

pisces

140.) Do you like to dance? Do you dance often? In front of other people?

when im drunk

141.) Name some of your favorite colors.

blue

142.) Have you ever shoplifted? If so, what was it?

yes random stuff from walmart lmao

143.) If you could speak three additional languages, what would they be?

spanish, italian and french

144.) Have you ever been in legal trouble?

eh

145.) Have you ever had surgery?

yes twice.

146.) If you could change 2 things about yourself, what would you change and why?

my body and my face bc uglyand fat

147.) What do you want done with your body after you die?

cremated

148.) What three physical features do people compliment you most on? What do they say about them?

my hair, eyes and outfit sometimes.

149.) If you could have your own business, what would you do?

something that requires me to travel

150.) What current friend do you have that you’ve known the longest?

Angelica--known her before we were born 

[ts-autumns-world]

Episode 4: “Tua supremacy babey” - Lily O

I GET TO REUNITE WITH JINX YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

me waking up to see that im in the new tribe: https://media.tenor.com/images/93212119a4887f9fa0ad945c7ae2a5d0/tenor.gif

tbh i expected the swap since like we have 14 rn so its a reasonable number to do a swap before the merge.. but like this swap sucks not only me being the only one from og eener but its also me having to be with these 4 whites ppl. you know i don't trust white ppl except mikki SDFSDFSDFSDF so this absolutely SUCKS. and geekoffilm is on another tribe too.

URGH i hope i can team up with jinx and jude. and joey and i used to play together in CoW so hopefully, i am able to make him want to work with me again.. but monty... monty is very skeptical cause like they could just vote me off now. BUT THEN, i know that either jinx or raffy has the idol for sure, so maybe i need to ask jinx for that. or i just ask the person who i'll be up against with in the tic tac toe to throw a challenge if they are the og eener too. 

much to think about bestie booth. i wanna trust these ppl so bad but i have trust issues

https://youtu.be/JrXnnD5KU0I

---

naur this is the plan if we go to council

imma be like joey

you are the only cis white man on the team

you have to go. 

you wanna be an ally?

THIS IS HOW!!!

so im pushing for u FEWEJFEEFJEFEIFEFIJW 

heS ALWAYS SAYING HE WANTS TO BE A BETTER ALLY

ALWAYS CALLING ME LIKE JINX IM SO SORRY

ILL BE LIKE FOR WHAT?? 

HE'S LIKE FOR BEING A WHITE CIS STRAIGHT MAN. 

IF UR REALLY SORRY ULL LEAVE!

I have to start this out by saying Giraffez, I’m so sorry! I tried my best but too many people wanted to keep us comp strong and wanted Lily O to stay. I really wish we would have had the chance to play longer together but sometimes it’s just not in the cards.

As far as swap goes, I’m really happy about my team. We have a majority from my original group which is pretty wild. I wish Chips was here and I really hope he makes it work somehow but I’m ngl I’m a little worried about him.

I was so so thrilled to see Jinx on Tua with me. I also have started talking with Captain and Jude. They both seem super nice so as always I’m hoping to avoid tribal once again.

I’d like to the think that original Llih (was that how you spelled it?) will stay together but Giraffez told me that Lily O told her that she was voting for me. Now obviously we all voted Giraffez but I think Lily O knows I was plotting. So. I hope we can stick together. But. Yeah. Your girl is worried. And excited. She is excited cause this group seems cool. But nervous because yeah I’m not ready for another vote out. Mkay. Bye.

This swap went pretty well for me all things considered. I still have a bunch of people from my OG Tribe, and the new people seem active and really nice! So, I like my tribe. Blake offered to me today to work together closely in the game which I am down for. The semi-inactive people need to stick together and all that lmao. Other than that, I am straight Vibing

Swap time! honestly its time to kick it into high gear and win this immunity challenge! make some real allies!

HELLO AUTUMNS WORLD!!!!!! So I have arrived in a swapped team with 3 of my old members! SOOO happy Mikki is here firstly since we can discuss basically anything. Blake and Raffy im also cool with but not like as close with them. Maybe a bit more with Blake. Of the new people my fav is Chris !! Already liking our chats and hope it can turn more strategic later maybe!! Ricky is also cool and funny and chips I was allies with him in Kili which is cool but probably the weakest connection of the new people so far!! It looks like we are gonna lose and if so its kinda hard like on one hand we have easy majority to vote off idk probably chips or maybe ricky or we could go against tribal linesI think Blake truly does wanna work with me tho but is just busy. Like going against tribal lines is kinda fun but maybe dumb. And chips being the 1 in a 4-2-1 swap sucks too!! Idk kind of evaluating the vibe with Mikki and will see what we think later if we lose… we would probs be safe regardless being protected by tribal lines on one side and having developed sorta good vibes with Chris and Ricky from the other side so probs wouldn’t be targeted from that angle either?? Hopefully… I did have kind of a delayed start with the new people cuz of irl stuff but yah we will see!

My opinion on swap was initially sad because I was missing out on Jinx/Jude/Joey/Captain BUT then I realize I like this tribe?? Im with Ricky still, Mikki probably is sitting at the cookout as we spesk, Chips is lowkey goody but I got my eye on him, Benj and I bond over Agatha Christie <3, Blake I knew from TDI so we have been goofin like a Goofy movie, Raffy I actually enjoy that we chat of the most mundane things, and that's everybody! I think I have a chance to survive on this tribe

---

My thoughts are that I've got Ricky and Mikki at minimum. I know Mikki/Raffy got beef but I doubt they go for each other. Chips is like a level-headed Joey but I reckon one of him/Blake/Benj will be targeted if I had to guess. Nevertheless me and Captain talked during our matchup and exchanged info. My hope is me or Ricky are in Outhouse but I also hope not so we have higher odds to keep the goodies all goodie and safe

https://voca.ro/18WSqZznajDx

---

I LOVE JUDE

so idk where my last confessional left off but i think it was before tribal. so after tribal, jinx’s manifestations came true, we swapped, i ended up on a tribe with no one i knew except chris, so that was kind of…nnng. but hey, gotta roll with the punches. me and jinx were paired up for the challenge which game me a bit of time to talk with them, and they gave me some insight on ppl i didn’t really know on my tribe, and also they gave me a tarot reading, and it basically said that while i’m probably gonna have to deal with some bullshit, i just have to use everything i’ve learned to get over any obstacles, and stay calm and collected through it all. i’m really really praying for this one, since we just lost immunity, and now chris is going to the outhouse, i’m afraid that i’m truly all alone now. and if there’s one thing that scares me it’s being alone. i really like mikki tho, and i heard benj was good ppl. maybe if i let them know that raffy might have the half idol then maybe they’d be more inclined to work with me, but i also really enjoy raffy’s presence, so i don’t really want him to be a target. blake and i have had a good amount of dialogue so i’m hoping that he’d be willing to work with me, to be honest. ughhhhh why why why tribal. WHY TRIBAL. in all my years of playing tumble survivor i’ve never been sent to like…and exile or redemption island ONCE. not once….ever…. please god let me get to the outhouse just one time.

First of all, lemme just say I'm so amused by how quickly my chances of no-votes went RIGHT out the door. But also thank god that it went off without a hitch! And right before a swap, no less New tribe is definitely iconic. LOVE Jinx, Captain and Jude are cool too, and then my Llih buddies are also v nice to have (shoutouts monty and joey)

Tua supremacy babey

https://youtu.be/oP7DWOnmt40

https://youtu.be/Z3_pyWTdRh8

https://youtu.be/UFshPYJ98z0

hello confessional booth... i'm here to give you um. something i hope!!!! 

well since the swap, i feel like i've managed to fit in better than i expected cause ive been feeling under the weather and i don't rlly have energy to talk to anyone (which is so great that our tribe won this IC) but i rlly need to work on that more for sure..

joey wants to work with me.. like a lot. we worked together for a bit in CoW before he was voted out and he was a great ally to me back then so i think i can trust joey a little bit? and he rlly wants the pocs to go far so i think this is a good sign.

with jinx, we've been wanting to talk about the outhouse thing but jinx wants to call and i've been feeling sick so we haven't called but hopefully we can do that soon. i trust jinx a lot and i know they're gonna take care of me.

jude.. you know i like her since i saw her intro vid so yup gonna need to talk to her more!!!

lily c.. my fellow teacher pls SFSFSDFSD i enjoy our chat a lot like idt its much but every time we talk, with her, it just feels great and nice and like we just get to know each other so far so i hope we can talk game a bit more but we'll see

lily o.. we haven't talked since the day the swap happened. idk why. maybe she's busy or maybe i should dm her first so i think i'm gonna do that tmr my time if i have the energy.

and monty... PLEASE idk if i can trust monty or not. like he's a good friend of mine but my experience in orgs with them is that they tried to break the swp apart (which was smart but then mikki and i are both playing so gotta keep an eyes on them)

i'm just trying to feel good and hopefully recover soon cause i hate being sick. idk i'm scared of covid!!!!! but i haven't gone outside for a week or two methinks so we're gonna pray and see.

---

missing mikki and hope she will be fine

Blake suggested starting an OG Eneer alliance to Mikki and Benj. They took them up on the offer so I guess I am in my first alliance of the game based on arbitrary reasons. In any case, they seem to want to vote out Chips which is a RIP. But whatever keeps me safe for one more round.

I don’t have an obsession with the Mr. Robinson’s Neighborhood sketch from SNL... No I clearly don’t... https://youtu.be/whfQf3Pd5bU

It’s my chronic overthinking in this swap that is going to do me in, I feel. It’s the pressure of having to actually think differently, and coming off of EVERYTHING I’ve seen in this community over the past 6 months, oh good Lord have mercy, I feel as though its so hard for me to want to not sacrifice my game, but at the same time... I feel all the pressure in the world to flip. I did have a lucid dream that if I got to a point where I consistently voted only white people at every Council, it would make my game look REALLY good by comparison, since I literally did everything I could, and no, I don’t want to hear anyone post season say this was rigged for Jinx, it’s not, we’re only going to go against each other down the road because of how this season has been set up, and it breaks my heart

https://photos.app.goo.gl/eSvSGkc4zmBfnYVP7

So here's some tea I suppose. I was a pretty big fan of the tribe swap because people talked more in general. This was particularly interesting considering their different timezones but continued ability to keep up conversation. It was pretty apparent that I was at a numbers deficit from my original tribe but my hope was that people didn't want to play like "that" and then if they did that my former tribe would throw it to keep the numbers. Apparently that is not true as Lily C went as hard as possible to win a challenge she could have convincingly thrown as an "accident" multiple times. At any rate, based on the total lack of communication with me concerning who I am voting it is evident that either the plan is to vote someone without telling me or that it is to vote me. This means that regardless of the situation I am in a terrible position and will be leaving sooner rather than later. I don't know that I've been swap screwed in the past (perhaps, I've been playing for too long) but it really stinks. 

For the TL;DR watch this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dzftXB28gBE

 http://www.purplerockpodcast.com/wp-content/uploads/survivor-pearlislands-lillian-morris-no-sir.gif

As I'm writing this, I have a big gulp from... you guessed it... 7/11. I need to flip on one of the three of Monty, Lily O, and Lily C. My best option is going to vote for Lily O, I need Monty and Lily C to know I'm only doing this because yanno, things look awfully awful, and the pressure of making the right move and yet making sure I don't lose relationships is starting to get to me.

I also need them as shields because theyre the only winners in this game, and I need them here as shields for down the road heading into a merge.

I can't even believe I found TWOA IDOLS! I had to think a lot about who to give it too but I decided to do what felt like the smartest thing to do. Jinx and Captain already trust me and I enjoy Ricky but he gives semi chaotic energy. With that in mind, I had to give it to Jude as a sign of faith. Not only am I wanting her to do well, but I want to prove to her I legit want to work with her come merge 😊

https://youtu.be/vOn8Zsi0njA

https://youtu.be/UWTB-LYjbu0

for Chips: https://youtu.be/lSeDZdSEl4o

[boo1a4]

11 question tag!

Hey guys so I was tagged by 5 of my fav gals to do the 11 questions tag (THATS 55 QUESTIONS WHY ARE YALL LIKE THIS) but anyway I was tagged by @s-lay-ing @sambashua @achuu-nice @indiepoptime and @yongpal-i (this tag is fucking eternal help me)

Cloud’s Questions!

Do you know a ksong by heart? (bc I don’t :x I can hum a trillion tho)

Blackpink’s As If Its Your Last, Heize’s Star, Day6 I loved you and You Were Beautiful, most of seventeens title tracks and most of their ballads, lastly  Pristin’s Aloha! I'm sure my pronunciation is way off but those are tho the ones that I've taken the time to actually sit down and learn!

When it comes to friendships, are you low or high maintenance? (As in your friends gotta talk everyday with you or you’ll feel like the friendship is dying OR if you can spend days without talking to them yet you still remain close)  

Ummmm I think it depends on the friendship? also I think I can tend to be a bit of both (cause I'm an insecure ass binch), tho I don't ever feel like my friendships are dying lmao

Do you have a secret that you will take to the grave? (Ofc I’m not asking you to reveal it)

not that I can think of?? like I'm sitting here thinking if there is anything and like honestly no????

Recommend me 5 songs (not necessarily kpop songs)

Dracula Teeth - The Last Shadow Puppets(honestly cloud just listen to all of their music is so great) Daydream In Blue - I Monster (this is honestly one of my all time fav songs I love it too much) No Way Down - The Shins (you know I can't go 2 mins without mentioning them, some great lyrics right here tho also give September a listen in beautiful) Beechwood Park - The Zombies (I'm assuming you know the zombies cloud but on the off chance that you don't BINCH THEY ARE MY ACTUAL FAVORITE well beside cream and zeppelin but they are up there) Kimbra - Miracle (kinda of a random one but this song just never seems to leave me!) Big Bird -Hyukoh (oh that was 6 BUT THIS SONG IS SO GREAT also listen to wing wing!!)

What do you prefer?: first, second or third gen kpop songs?

I generally prefer second generation??? I think????? I like a bit of all of them tho. but like there is no definitive answer to when each of the generations start and end so like I don't even know??? but most of my fav groups as far as music goes are older around 2nd gen but a fair amount of them are gen 3, I have a really strong love for kpop that was released between 2009-2014.

What’s the cheeeeeeeeeesiest thing you’ve done? (one time a former friend of mine was telling me about a problem she had and at the end of our convo I kissed her in the forehead bYE)

girl idk just my whole fucking life tbh, but my family members and irl friends will all tell you I do this thing where I yell sing songs and change the lyrics to their names this includes badly sung kpop songs IM SCREAMING THO CLOUD WHO ARE YOU AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA

If you were asked to participate in a variety show, which one of the following would you pick and why? (Pick two!): problematic men, master key, hello counselor, weekly idol, one fine day, law of the jungle

um probs ofd?? id say weekly idol also but damn the hosts would literally be like who is this weird binch!

Your top 10 kpop songs of 2017?

In no order but 1. Would U - Red Velvet 2. Let’s Hang Out - SF9 3. Night Rather Than Day - EXID 4. Aloha - Pristin 5. Missing You - BTOB 6. I Loved You - Day6 7. Teenager - Got7 8. Habit - Seventeen 9. As If It’s Your Last - Blackpink 10. You, Clouds, Rain - Heize

Would you rather live in a huge mansion or a compact studio house?  

Im a real messy binch so definitely compact studio

Tell me a fun childhood story (I’ll start! One time an aunt gave me money to buy ‘papas’ (potatoes) at the grocery store so bc I’m obedient af I went and asked the counter lady how many of em could I buy with the money I had so she went ‘uhh, not many tbh’ so i ended up getting like two and when I returned to my aunt’s house she laughed her ass off and said: I meant ‘papas fritas’ (potato chips) Not those! - and uh yeah this is funnier in Spanish but it proves that I’m such an innocent angel I mean wow)

ok so I spent a lot of time at my aunt Lori’s house when I was a kid (like summers, and after school) and my cousin was the BUG queen so she hand made leashes for her pet toads (that she caught) and we walked them around on leashes for like a week but I was always so afraid of them and also hurting them so I WAS NOT ABOUT THAT ahahaha dumb story but it makes me laugh alsoalsoalsdo they had this bench swing in their back yard and my cousin my sister and I would swing on it together for hours at a time and one time we were swinging real hard (REAL HARD) and the links?? or whatever that held it to the ceiling it was hanging from snapped and the three of us of us flew off of it and we all collectively blacked out??? it was so weird but I woke up to my cousin stuggling to get me off of her and then there lays my sister underneath the bench just blacked out chilling (she was fine) then my aunt came running out cause she had just heard the loudest crash ahsdfasdf not long after my uncle put stronger links on it and that bench is still there! From time to time when the three of us get together this story gets brought up its still the most hilarious thing ( ALSO CLOUD YOU ARE SO PURE I LOVE)

If you were offered to start a band, would you accept?

yeah I love music so much why not! not sure I would be able to contribute much  lmao

Mir’s Questions!

If you could travel anywhere, but were completely by yourself, where would you go?

hmmmmm do you mean like I wouldn't be visiting anyone and just traveling alone?? or like going someplace where I know no one?? ok cause for the first I would book it straight to az TO SEE YOU MIR!! AND SISTER!! but for the second I would love to go to Japan (my cousin lives there tho so that also doesn't technically count lmao)

What inspires you?

Music, books, and tv shows! Also really well written characters or just interesting people I guess! but on like a ??spiritual?? level my mom?? she's just that binch you know ( like seriously Ive never met anyone kinder or more driven and hard working in my life she's wild)

How many pets would you have in your ideal future? Any specific names or types in mind?

47 KITS, no realistically I want 2 kittos and they will be named Bellamy and Murphy cause I got too also lowkey want to name a cat rami or Elliot or also kaz or Inej damn all the good names wow. Also the name Calloway is my fav name of all time and I WANT SOMETHING WITH THIS NAME

What are you opinions on fedoras

um eww?? what other opinions are there?? what is this question mir I'm???? but like ngl when worn in a none cringe manner then can look nice!

how many spoons can you balance on your face at once (picture or video proof preferred (i’m trying to get someone to do it pls anyone))

girl I've done my time (lowkey did you put this on her cause I told you about my gravy spoon today???)

What is your favorite type of tree?

I like Birch trees!

If you could convince one person to like kpop who would you convert?

damn MY MOM cause then she might listen to something other than bruno mars once in a while

What are three things you are normally associated with and/or what are three things you want to be associated with?

art, sleeping, reading and um idk?? tbh??? like maybe not being shitty and being funny??? idk??? like I don't know????

If you were in a kpop group what position would you hold (ie. leader, main vocal, moodmaker, etc) feel free to tag your mutuals and who they would be!

um hm im a moody binch bonch so probably moodmaker?? mir is main dancer cause yes duh ivy is leader cause she's the only sane one kennedy I feel would be a great rapper like she got that chic thing going she could do it I feel??? and cloud would be our talent tbh??? nom would be the maknae cause she's small I feel! Jeddy would be my happy virus bud cause she's a fun and funny gal ( I love) Jamie ALSO ONE OF OUR TALENTS wow yes I feel a main vocal here she’d go solo and be singing ballads left and right! JESS WOULD BE THE SWEET MOTHER MEMBER THAT EVERYONE LOVES AND IS JUST THE SOFTEST,,,A SUNSHINE GAL.

If you could have any wild animal as a tame pet what would it be?? (i’m ocelot loyal all the way)

damn idk I'm like horrible at taking care of things (including myself) so like honest id just stick to the kit kats

What is your opinion on mint chocolate chip ice cream? (for maj)

The best ice cream (tho I can't eat it anymore and its very cursed)

Nom’s Questions!

how are you? :D

I’m good Nom thanks for asking!

sad ballads or happy upbeat songs?

Im a ballad ho these days they are honestly all I listen to anymore, but I do love me an good upbeat song I'm just slightly more picky about them!

fave anime movie?

ok tie between Whisper of the Heart and Howl’s Movie Castle, I honestly need to see more that arent Ghibli!

dogs or cats?

Cats! (my dog is practically a cat tbh)

do you keep stuffed animals in your room?

I have one! its a portal companion cube! its not technically an animal BUT I LOVE IT ANYWAY ITS ALL IVE GOT!!!! also if you count tsum tsums I've got a few big hero 6 ones!

someone you miss?

My dad, its been especially hard lately.

describe your phone case?

its like rainbow watercolor! I have a pop socket that matches

favorite lore/myths?

Not technically myth or lore but Beowolf! I've seen the movie at least 40 times and I've read the epic! generally I find northern european mythology/literature to be more interesting than southern. but if we’re going for like ubran myths tbh not really my thing ahahaha.

eardbuds or headphones?

both for different things! but when I first listen to an album I like to listen with my headphones!

can I steal your heart?

you already have ~~~~~~~

favorite thing about your ult bias?

His sensitivity and kind heart! I love a sweet boy! Also I'm really here for Boo’s cheeks!

Jamie’s Questions!

If you could only listen to one song for the rest of your life what would it be and why?

ohhh there are a few songs that I really really love, Heize’s Star is a song that I listen to daily and I feel like I could listen to it for the rest of my life! also September by The Shins! Miracle Aligner by The Last Shadow Puppets also. Idk man I just really love songs with a mystical quality to them.

If you were in a kpop group what would your group be called and what would your fandom name be?

BINCH AND OUR FANDOM NAME WOULD BE BONCHES

If you could acquire mastery over ONE skill instantly, what would you pick and why?

Singing!! its just about the only kind of musical talent I think I’d be any good at! Im a vocalist ho I just want to be like my favessssss

First reaction if you spotted your favorite celebrity on the street?

I would literally hide so fast omg

First reaction if your favorite celebrity followed you on your favorite social media site?

SCREAMING ALL THE LOVE FOR BOO SEUNGKWAN 24/7 and literally only doing art of him and nonstop posting it

Snap your fingers and you get to steal your favorite outfit off of a kpop idol. What outfit do you pick, off of whom, and why?

OK literally all of Soonyoungs airport looks cause damn that boy does not get enough credit for his fashion (he's the best dressed in the group fite me)

If you were to get a painless tattoo that you could remove with the press of a button, what would you get and where would you get it?

umm probably something really pretty? and colorful? I'm not sure what put I like  arm tattoos!

What is your most prized possession?

probably my laptop?? also my collection of sketchbooks!

What’s a YouTube/online challenge that you have always wanted to try?

Im always interested to try those youtube art challenges, I've done the three marker challenge before and the draw this again challenge also!

You get a guarantee that your favorite celebrity will see your social media post but you only get 100 characters. What do you say to them?

I would literally just send my art to them! I feel like it says more than 100 characters can!

You wake up in your dream room. What does it look like?

LITERALLY A LIBRARY AND LIKE NICE AND DARK AND WARM BUT NOT TOO WARM LOTS OF BLANKETS

Kennedy’s Questions!

Make a 10-song playlist for your current mood.

it is here

What vine do you quote the most?

what is that?? who you fighting?

What do you value most in a friend?

I like people who are good listeners! but also people can keep a conversation going! But really tho just genuine kindness and openness.

If you could learn any kpop choreography instantly, what would you learn?

DAMN THIS IS HARD, so many great ones that I love a lot but probably Red Flavor?

If you go to your Tumblr activity page, who does it say is your “number one fan?”

damn Idk them so I'm not gonna like tag them or something lol

What is your ideal clothing style?

I like simple dark clothing that is comfortable.

What is your favorite Snapchat filter?

I really like the ugly ones tbh I don't use them enough

What subject would you like to study, but wouldn’t necessarily want to make a career out of? (for example: I really want to learn about botany!)

psychology, I really love learning about how people work.

Would you rather be constantly half an hour early to everything, or constantly 15 minutes late?

early of course, I hate being late

Would you rather have a single day to spend with your top bias or a week to spend with your number 2 bias?

damn neither??? ahahah no a day with boo would be very blessed!

If you could bring back any disbanded OR inactive group, who would you bring back?

F(X) BINCH I NEED MORE MUSIC

My Questions!

if you had to chose one kpop stage outfit to wear for the rest of your life which would you choose?

favorite music video aesthetic?

Group you are most excited for in 2018?

Recommend me some underrated kpop songs/groups?

If you could join any group other than your bias group who would you join and why?

Favorite soloist? and some song recs?

Childhood Story? (thanks Cloud)

Were you in any fandoms before you got into kpop, if so what were they?

Favorite Comeback/debut of 2017?

astrological sign? Myers Briggs type? Hogwarts House (I'm a Gemini, infp, and Gryffindor)

Random question but what are your favorite names?

Tagging : @s-lay-ing @sambashua @achuu-nice @indiepoptime @yongpal-i (y'all can do mine if you feel like it!) @forgetjunnot @babybyuny @kae-popx @kiheehyunie @jeonwoooo @trbldean130 @howcaniwait @joshhjs @maetaamong and if you’ve already done this you don't have to do it again ahahahaha I feel like everyone has done it already lol

ok thats it do it if you want!

[callhimyoungk]

zombie apocalypse with Brian AU

so i finally made a zombie apocalypse AU yayyy this was supposed to be a fic but i got lazy and have no time for writing a full fic sigh ,, but now im writing this out for #day6halloweenfest !!  this is lowkey a total mess ripp please give me some feedback, should i do a part two, or should i do one with each member? this didn’t turn out to be quite what i was expecting sigh but i hope you guys liked it! 

p/s: im prob gonna make one like zombie apocalypse with DAY6

read my other posts under my tag #mine

EDIT: part two

the world is coming to an end and you have no idea how you managed to survive until now, (lol lies) 

you prob survived bc of brian kang 

zoMBIES are everywhere due to some mutant virus that spread globally within weeks 

you were at your university when all hELL BREAKS LOOSE skdkfjf

zombies were piling into the hallways, biting and chasing people, 

that was two months ago, somehow you manage to survive until right now, no point in telling how cause it's all in the past 😏

you met B R I A N in a month after everything went out of control at your university's parking lot 

you were trying to find a car that still works and after an hour of looking around (for both cars and zombies :/ ), you finally found one and

you were just seated in the driver seat when 

someone came running out of one of the school's building 

with a bunch of zombies staggering after him 

it was b r i a n k A N G 

he saw you and a look passed between the both of you 

when he ran towards your car and swung himself in 

"Drive! Drive! Fucking drive!" 

little did he know, you were a really bad driver even tho you got your license 

you legit crashed the rear of the car into another car parked behind yours, making a loud noise, and

making brian cringe 

"Christ, do you even know how to drive?!" 

you drove the car into a zombie stumbling in front of the car before you successfully exited the parking lot, 

all in the while bumping into zombies here and there 

and listen to brian curse and yell 

(surprising tf outta you cause he's MrNiceGuy in your school who's aLwAys Nice, or that's how the story goes) 

cause he wasn't sure if he was safer to bet his chances with the zombies or with your driving skills 

the both of you decided to stick together after you "saved" him from the zombies at the parking lot

"I'm so glad I'm not the only one left alive," he said with a big wide smile 

and at that moment you were pretty sure zombieism(?) is cured

that smile was too perfect

you brought him back to your hideout, a small but secured house near downtown that you found empty during the first week 

he was impressed bc turned out that he had been sleeping in cars for the past month 

"Only two things in this world that could make me happy, a decent bed and decent food" coming from brian 

he was straight up knocked out as soon as he saw the sofa-bed at the living room and fell asleep impossibly quick 

you tried not to stare at him like a creep when he was asleep 

he really was perfect 

When he was finally awoke from his sleep you showed him your food collection 

hams, beef jerky, canned food, dried fruit, chips, cookies, sodas, water, chocolates

he was quiet for a moment before he grabbed his backpack 

took out all of the food he stored inside and pushed them to you 

"uh what are you doing? what-" 

"DON'T EVER TRUST ME AROUND FOOD"

he looked so cute in your eyes ;)

that night, you guys shared your food together 

and he told you about him sleeping in cars and where he get food 

he basically swept the university cafeteria clean off food 

"Why leave all those edible food to waste when I could fill up my never ending hunger?"

you had to agree with that because honestly true af 

you told about how you find food and how you found this house 

he was really impressed and that made you feel proud of yourself 

it wasn't long before he got sleepy again, but he looked hesitant to go to sleep again

thinking that he was worried about zombies breaking in, you reassured him that the house was really safe and that every door and window was locked up and blocked- 

"No no I wasn't really worrying about that. I feel bad for taking up your bed. Maybe we should just sleep together"

(VErY GoOd B r i a n k a n g)

you choKED and you wondered if he was being serious

and he looked at your face and FINALLY realized what he had said 

"I-I mean we should share...a bed.. together, and n-not sleeping together, you know, in that way," 

he was blushing 

i repeat 

BRIAN KANG WAS BLUSHING

so the both of you ended up s l e e p i n g together 

okay sharing a bed together 

you two never talked about how the both of you were legit cuddling and hugging with each other during your sleep 

e v e r y t i m e 

the both of you left town a few days later, before food was running out 

bc brian was a big eater

the two of you drove here and there, scavenging along your journey

gathering all the supplies you can 

and fighting zombies all the while ofc 

whenever you both prepared to enter some shady stores/houses, he nEVER allowed you to enter first 

(aw)  

the both of you just slept in the car, ate in the car, hanging out in there bc the both of you couldn’t find any safe places

he was always happy whenever you guys found enough amount of food to last days 

but oh boy, you should had trusted him when he said to never let him take care of food 

there was this one time when you woke up in the middle of the night inside the dark car, 

( a lot of time actually) 

and there he was. eating two chocopies  at once 

“I’m too hungry, y/n, i’m too hungry PLEASE FORGIVE ME”

but you forgave him as soon as he shared his chocopie with you 

the both of you always tried to talk to each other as much as possible

getting to know each other etc

to build up our teamwork and friendship, brian would say 

he would tell you about his life and his dreams before the apocalypse

he loved to sing so you would always ask him to sing for you, especially during the night when the both of you were deep in thoughts and not feeling sleepy yet 

luCKy you 

his voice would lull you to sleep 

you two got close real quick, 

the effect of spending every day and every night together 

he looked after you all the time, making sure you had enough sleep, and enough food 

once you got sick, and he was so panicked and upset 

he tried his best to help you 

he didn’t want to lose you as he couldn’t imagine surviving a world like this without you 

developed a crush on you after two months of living with each other 

but he will never tell you 

bc he feels like you were not even interested

which ofc you are, helloooo this is brian kang we’re talking about 

you tried to coax him into telling you that he likes you 

but he always changed the subject

“Brian, i know you like me” 

“I like anyone who’s alive and has a heartbeat right now,”

someone go and punch this clueless boi please

but you guys were already behaving like a couple anyway 

the both of you cuddled every night before going to sleep 

he thought you didn’t know that he gave you forehead kisses every night when he thought you were asleep 

“Brian stop kissing me,” 

he acted like he fell asleep already 

you two promised to keep each other safe no matter what 

and you two planned to do just so 

the zombie apocalypse was just slightly bearable bc you two have each other to count on and lean on 

[cleocazo]

Ultimate ship for Jack & Pandora I miss our gay moms

ultimate ship ask meme   /   accepting  !

General:

How long will they last? : i think for as long as they’re.. alive.

How quickly did/will they fall in love? : it was p slow and that was entirely on jack. once she fell tho, she fell hard.

How was their first kiss? : one of those kisses that was just… pure and simple, emotionally charged. it had definitely been building a while, before they gave in.

Wedding:

Who proposed? : jack ! she def always looked at her mum and dad as an example of eternal love to aim for, and when she found it, she was not letting it pass her by.

Who is the best man/men? : jack’s siblings fulfilled the role for her.

Who is the bridesmaid(s)? : uh… some friend of dora’s, i’m sure.

Who did the most planning? : they did equal amts of planning.

Who stressed the most? : dora.

How fancy was the ceremony? : not very. it was an outside wedding, and it was very lowkey. like, 10 guests max, lowkey. they made most of the stuff themselves, and it was all very wholesome. they’ll prob do a fancier renewal of their vows eventually.

Who was specifically not invited to the wedding? : oogie.

Sex:

Who is on top? : jack. i just… know, you know? 

Who is the one to instigate things? : depends. i would say it’s p equal.

How healthy is their sex life? : it’s fine! good! words in line w both of those! they don’t have a wild sex life by any means ( too many kids livin in their house ), but it works for them.

How kinky are they? : they definitely enjoy being a lil freaky in bed, but they save the more out of pocket things for when it’s a special occasion. 

How long do they normally last? : im uncomfortable w this question.

Do they make sure each person gets an equal amount of orgasms? : they’re gay, so, like, yea.

How rough are they in bed? : not very. their relationship is built on TENDER , LOVE , AND CARE.

How much cuddling/snuggling do they do? : lots. jack is the little spoon.

Children:

How many children will they have naturally? : none.

How many children will they adopt? : they have six kids ; fisher, friday, blair, cassandra, freddy & clarice. i honestly and truly believe they could end up with more.

Who gets stuck with the most diapers? : pros of adopting kiddos that are a little older and need loving homes : they never got stuck w diaper duty.

Who is the stricter parent? : they’re both pretty on level. i would say everyone THINKS its jack, but she’s actually pretty chill - why do y’all think freddy gets away w being such a maniac?

Who stops the kid(s) from doing dangerous stunts after school? : jack, always.

Who remembers to pack the lunch(es)? : they give ‘em money, and if they don’t use that on lunch that’s on them.

Who is the more loved parent? : jack. sorry, dora, but i’m just talking facts.

Who is more likely to attend the PTA meetings? : jack and dora go together for the united front.

Who cried the most at graduation? : dora.

Who is more likely to bail the child(ren) out of trouble with the law? : jack.

Cooking:

Who does the most cooking? : dora, mostly. jack ain’t got the time.

Who is the most picky in their food choice? : solely by default dora bc now im thinking abt it how much does jack even eat.

Who does the grocery shopping? : dora goes weekly w freddy and clarice.

How often do they bake desserts? : dora does a nice dessert every night for the kiddos.

Are they more of a meat lover or a salad eater? : it’s up to everybody what their personal pref is.

Who is more likely to surprise the other(s) with an anniversary dinner? : jack ! 

Who is more likely to suggest going out? : dora ! 

Who is more likely to burn the house down accidentally while cooking? : neither.

Chores:

Who cleans the room? : jack loves cleaning, so u know it b her.

Who is really against chores? : the kids.

Who cleans up after the pets? : they take after their pets. the kids r encouraged to take after theirs. 

Who is more likely to sweep everything under the rug? : dora.

Who stresses the most when guests are coming over? : jack.

Who found a dollar between the couch cushions while cleaning? : the kids go fishing nightly.

Misc:

Who takes the longer showers/baths? : jack.

Who takes the dog out for a walk? : i dont know if they have a dog.

How often do they decorate the room/house for the holidays? : they go ALL OUT for EVERY holiday. even valentines. bc its fridays birthday.

What are their goals for the relationship? : i think they’re p set.

Who is most likely to sleep till noon? : dora.

Who plays the most pranks? : neither.

[stitch-xiu-up]

Changkyun and Jooheon Gangster!AU

So, I got this for a request, originally, the person requested either member, but I thought, screw it! I’ll do both ^-^ So this is how it turned out in the end!

Lotto Love

~ Stitch

Jooheon

How he meets you:

(Y/N) was walking home from work in the early hours of the morning because hospital shifts are the worst, so being a nurse is great and all but when you see a person who is clearly screaming danger and is bleeding rather heavily while unconscious at a very unsociable hour (2 am lol), a normal person’s reaction would be to get the hell out of there. But being a nurse, (Y/N) has sworn to save any life that she can, so, against their better judgement, (Y/N) goes over to him where they immediately start to bandage gashes (most medical people tend to carry around some form of first aid equipment around with them). (Y/N) was also monitoring this person’s pulse and reaction levels. They stayed with this strange boy (he’s totes a man, but he looks so god damn squishy with those adorbs cheeks). Anywho, (Y/N) stayed with this person for five whole hours until they regained consciousness. As far as Jooheon was concerned, when he unexpectedly opened his eyes (he legit thought that he was going to die in this alley way ngl), he saw an angel. And from that day on Jooheon did his best to keep minor injuries so he could see (Y/N) again, I mean (Y/N) thought that it was pretty cute, but at the same time, they weren’t too impressed with the frequency that he was coming in with injuries.

How he asks you out:

Jooheon had honestly worked up all his courage for this moment. I mean, obviously he has courage, he’s part of a mafia but that courage is different to confessing attraction to a person and telling them what he does for a living while hoping and praying that they can see past the fact that he kills people and deals in drugs and whatnot. He honestly looked like he was going to pass out or throw up (maybe even both) when he went to go and pick (Y/N) up after their shift ended. “So, uh, (Y/N) um…” was how this whole conversation started, after a little reassurance to keep talking from (Y/N) it all came out in a flood. “I’m part of the X Mafia! But! I also really really like you!” He had blurted out while his cheeks flushed as red as apples. (Y/N) was pretty taken aback at how out the blue the whole thing had been, but hey, “Jooheon, when I first saw you, I kind of figured that you didn’t have normal salary job” “Oh…”

How you two end up married:

Jooheon and (Y/N) had been dating for like, a frickin decade (lol, jokes, not that long). It had been two years to the day when Jooheon took (Y/N) out to a little park that was super pretty in the evening when the weather was just perfect, light breeze but still warm enough that a jacket wasn’t completely necessary. Anywho, Jooheon had been planning this for absolutely ages! He had asked the other guys for tips, they all gave him absolutely useless information so he was left to watch chick flicks and look stuff up online. Anyway, He was so sure that he had everything sorted! Jooheon took (Y/N) through a small wooded area that would look creepy if (Y/N) didn’t know how much of a cutie patootie he was to them. Once he guided them both through the woods, (Y/N) was met with the prettiest scene before them, fireflies bobbed about and danced through the sky while gloxinia flowers (they mean love at first sight) spelt out the words that (Y/N) had been waiting for. ‘Will you marry me?’ and as (Y/N) turned around, Jooheon was already on one knee with a box in his hand. Opening the box and revealing the ring was all it took for (Y/N) to throw themselves into his arms wailing a ‘yes’ somewhere in between.

Chankyun

How he meets you:

Changkyun and (Y/N) met at a high school reunion that Changkyun’s friends at the time had dragged him to against his will. (Y/N) had always been a rather quiet student that had never really grabbed anyone’s attention which was one of the reasons that they were standing alone and drinking alcohol while watching everyone mingling with old classmates. A sigh slipped past (Y/N)’s lips as their eyes scanned the crowd once again, stopping when a certain mobster caught their attention. Im Changkyun had always been a bit of a delinquent even in high school, so when some rumours spread through the old school years that he was part of a big time mafia, (Y/N) wasn’t particularly surprised. (Y/N) knew of him in high school but wasn’t associated or introduced to him in any way other than that they knew ‘of’ him. Either way, getting a little off topic here. (Y/N) stared at him for a little while thinking that he hadn’t really changed very much, still very attractive but taller and much more mature looking (In a mobster and intimidating way). Anywho, as (Y/N) was staring at Changkyun in interest, his eyes slid over to look straight back at (Y/N). However, they hadn’t actually noticed yet so a smirk couldn’t really help itself but to glide it’s way across Changkyun’s lips. Without hesitation, he made his way smoothly over. His suit was pretty damn fancy and the way he was holding his glass of whiskey was also pretty damn fine, not going to lie. When (Y/N) finally noticed that he was moving towards them, (he was like a meter away) they started to panic a little. But it was too late. “Hey, It’s … (Y/N) … right?” He asked as he tilted his head slightly. “Changkyun… right?” (Y/N) countered. Oh, how interesting Changkyun found this person to be.

How he asks you out:

Changkyun had been keeping in contact with (Y/N) quite frequently over social media and he wasn’t as bad as they had assumed he would have been. Their communication started to get a little steamy though, it started with little jokes and general conversation but then it started to change and get a lot more sexual. Obviously they were both adults and they weren’t going to do anything completely stupid. (Y/N) originally just replied as a little joke but they started to get into it. Changkyun was very good at making people feel special, thankfully though, (Y/N) was able to figure this out and stopped replying to his messages and unfollowed him on social media. Fate, however, had different plans for the two of them. (Y/N) was out at a club with some friends from work. (Y/N) had decided to just let go and thought ‘fuck it’ while throwing drinks down the back of their throat like there was no tomorrow (lol, if this night went the wrong way, there probs wouldn’t be a tomorrow for (Y/N)). What Changkyun wasn’t expecting as he drowned his frustration in whiskey and vodka (mixing your spirits is never a good idea kids! Don’t copy Changkyun), anyway, he definitely wasn’t expecting to see (Y/N) dancing only a few meters away from him at the last place he thought he would ever see them. With alcohol coursing through his system, he stood and swerved around the meaningless people and beelined straight for (Y/N) where he immediately grabbed their face and kissed them hotly and with a fervor that he had never felt before. And the rest of the night was a bit of a blur if I’m being honest. But (Y/N) woke up, knowing for sure, that they did not own silk sheets and that their bed did not smell like a very expensive cologne, (Y/N) also knew, that they did not have a person in their single bed. (Yes,they did the do, the frick frack, the one night stand.) “So,” Changkyun hummed in a deep pitch as he ruffled his hair, “want to go out?” He smirked as he pressed his lips to (Y/N)’s cheek.

How you two end up married:

Changkyun and (Y/N) had been together for almost three years now and (Y/N) was waiting for the big moment when Changkyun was going to ask them to marry him. Days turned to weeks and weeks turned to months. (Y/N) was starting to expect that they were always only going to stay dating. Changkyun was wanting to get married too, unbeknownst to (Y/N). It’s just that he knows how dangerous his lifestyle is and he wouldn’t want to put his wife in unnecessary danger simply because of his last name. By this point (Y/N) was starting to consider just proposing to him instead if he wasn’t going to make the first move. The day that (Y/N) was going to ask him to get married, there was quite a big fight that had Changkyun way too occupied, so that chance was missed, another few months slipped by again after that. But one night, after Changkyun had managed to one way or another get (Y/N) into bed with him again for the fourth time that week. Anyway, as (Y/N) was lying there just thinking, Changkyun was scrolling through his phone as he broke the comfortable silence, “Let’s get married, yeah.” He said it so matter of factly that it threw (Y/N) off a little. Didn’t take long for them to recover though, “You’re asking me that now? Really?” (Y/N) frowned before continuing, “Where’s the romance Changkyun, Jesus!” They huffed as they pulled the bed sheets closer to their body. “Well sorry, I didn’t realise you wanted a big song and dance about it.” Was all he had to say for himself as he continued to scroll while simultaneously handing (Y/N) a box with a ring inside.

[maraudeath]

Girl Talk

okay i’m addicted to these lmao someone stop me

Marlene McKinnon to bitches get stitches watch it macdonald: listen, do you guys think that if i dyed my hair blue my mom would kill me????

Mary MacDonald: she might not but i sure would take the opportunity to call you smurfette

Marlene McKinnon: why don’t you want me to be happy????

Dorcas Meadowes: I think it’s a good idea I vote yes

Marlene McKinnon: aww babe <3

Dorcas Meadowes: Always here for you babe <3

Mary MacDonald: jfc y’all are sickening

Lily Evans: Smurfette’s hair is blonde????

Mary MacDonald to Lily Evans: why does Potter look like he’s gonna kill someone??

Lily Evans: idk i told him to stop being an irresponsible prick earlier so that might be a factor

Mary MacDonald: right for the heart eh

Mary MacDonald: what was he even doing?

Lily Evans: He was trying to convince some kids that they have to pay to use the bathroom

Mary MacDonald: ooooo that’s not a bad idea did he make any money????

Lily Evans: Don’t even think about it

Dorcas Meadowes to Stop discouraging business plans Lily: Potter and Black got detention does anyone wanna guess what for???

Mary MacDonald: going into the girls locker room???

Lily Evans: They’ve done that already did they set something off in Filch’s office???

Marlene McKinnon: did they sneak food out of the kitchens again???

Dorcas Meadowes: All wrong

Dorcas Meadowes: They tried to get out of the locker room detention by calling Minnie a MILF

Marlene McDonald: SCREAMING

Lily Evans: whywhywhywhy???????????????????????

Mary MacDonald: idk probs would have worked on me

Lily Evans to Marlene McKinnon: Are you coming back to the dorm tonight???

Marlene McKinnon: nah im staying at Dorcas’ 

Lily Evans: cuuuuuute 

Lily Evans: have fun be safe and all that

Lily Evans: and bring breakfast when you come back tomorrow

Marlene McKinnon: tea and muffins??

Lily Evans: obvi

Marlene McKinnon: will do xx

Lily Evans to Mary has a mommy kink pass it on: the chat went off in class today and Flitwick was gonna take my phone but saw the chat name and gave it back

Dorcas Meadowes: Ayyyyyye you’re welcome

Mary MacDonald: I was wondering why he was looking at me weird in third period

Marlene McKinnon: i can’t believe Flitwick knows about your mommy kink

Mary MacDonald: I do NOT have a mommy kink!!!!!

Lily Evans: I dO NoT hAVe A MoMmY KinK

Mary MacDonald changed the chat name to I do not have a mommy kink you wankers

Marlene McKinnon changed the chat name to Mary has an EXTREME MOMMY KINK

Mary MacDonald: WHAT is so bad about me thinking im gonna be a MILF?????

Mary MacDonald: youre all bullies

Dorcas Meadowes to Marlene McKinnon: Potter has been staring at Lily all period

Marlene McKinnon: he does that every day though

Dorcas Meadowes: Yeah but it’s different this time

Marlene McKinnon: how so?????

Dorcas Meadowes: This time it’s less creepy and more like he’s admiring her which seems to be better

Marlene McKinnon: there does seem to be something different

Marlene McKinnon: it’s kind of sweet

Marlene McKinnon: if that’s not how you look at me im suing

Dorcas Meadowes: Sorry I avoid looking at you at all costs

Marlene McKinnon: okay hunty 

Dorcas Meadowes: STOP CALLING ME THAT

Mary MacDonald to Hunties Only <3: are we getting smashed tonight babes????

Marlene McKinnon: heeeeeeells yeah hunty

Dorcas Meadowes: I’ll only come if she stops saying that word

Marlene McKinnon changed the chat name to Dorcas is Queen Hunty

Dorcas Meadowes: JFC

Lily Evans: can’t make it babes i have a date

Mary MacDonald: U WOT M8

Marlene McKinnon: WITH WHOM?????

Lily Evans: if it goes well ill tell you

Dorcas Meadowes to Mary MacDonald and Marlene Mckinnon: JUST SAW LILY WITH POTTER AND THEY WERE LAUGHING TOGETHER 

Marlene McKinnon: OUR LILY AND JAMES POTTER?!?!

Mary MacDonald: wait are we sure???

Dorcas Meadowes: I’M LITERALLY LOOKING AT THEM RIGHT NOW THEY’RE HOLDING HANDS

Dorcas Meadowes: I TOOK A PICTURE OPEN THE DOOR IM SPRINTING IN

Lily Evans to Potter bones Evans on the daily: can James and his friends join tonight???

Marlene McKinnon: are they all prepared to watch the batchelor and hate all the people we do??

Mary MacDonald: we don’t even all hate the same people

Dorcas Meadowes: If they can get booze they can join

Lily Evans: already waaaaaay ahead of you in that department

Marlene McKinnon: ayyyyyye free booze is my middle name

Dorcas Meadowes: Liar it’s Bertha

Marlene McKinnon: HOW COULD YOU BETRAY ME LIKE THIS

Mary MacDonald changed the chat name to Marlene Bertha MacDonald

Marlene McKinnon left the chat

Mary MacDonald to Lily Evans: i need you to understand how in love with your red dress i am

Lily Evans: would you like to borrow it tonight???

Mary MacDonald: wow thats so nice i would love to!

Lily Evans: just don’t ruin its purity

Mary MacDonald: i will promise no such thing

Dorcas Meadowes to Stop telling people i have a mommy kink omfg: Who has the notes from last period they can lend me???

Lily Evans: i do 

Dorcas Meadowes: Ayyyye I knew you wouldn’t let me down

Lily Evans: I’ll give them to Marlene for you

Marlene McKinnon: give them to Mary i dont want to walk over

Mary MacDonald: dont even bother im not leaving my bed

Lily Evans: who pissed in your corn flakes

Dorcas Meadowes: why are we bringing that back its disgusting

Lily Evans changed the chat name to Who Pissed In Your Cornflakes

Mary MacDonald to Marlene McKinnon: Sirius Black just asked me if i have a mommy kink im going to MURDER you

Marlene McKinnon: ASHDFHHESIOVGBDEBEGV

Marlene McKinnon: IM LITERALLY DEAD

Mary MacDonald to Crying is for the weak break his neck instead: can we do a girls night???? i want romcoms and ice cream

Lily Evans: sure thing babe

Dorcas Meadowes: P.S. I Love You???

Marlene McKinnon: yesyesyesyes

Marlene McKinnon: Gerard Butler is my metaphorical daddy

Lily Evans: Never say “metaphorical daddy” ever again

Mary MacDonald: Marlene is uninvited goodbye

Dorcas Meadowes: I’ve literally never been more offended by anything you’ve said ever

Marlene McKinnon changed the chat name to I Would Go Straight For Gerard Butler

[sundcwns-blog]

heey, hello, it’s a meme. i’m maze ( she/her ) & hailing from one of the oh so lovely coughs gmt tzs aka gmt+2. besides being trash on the daily i’m literally always listening to music aka if u ever need something new in that department .. hello, or browsing through netflix without any intent on watching smth. living that wild life ik .. DKAMS. but you’re here for my two kids aka basil & saint so here we go ! if you’d like to plot like this and i’ll slide into ur ims or look under the read more for my disc*rd ! also as a warning i unintentionally was v vain and made both muses scorpios .....

☾ — ·˚ » BASIL CRATES is in saint tropez !! they often get mistaken as KIAN LAWLEY. apparently, HE/THEY is/are the JOCULAR of the group. they’re a TWENTY-ONE year old PANSEXUAL DEMIMALE. i hear they’re known as ALTRUISTIC and DOGMATIC. they also make their living as ART STUDENT / BARTENDER / COMIC BOOK ARTIST but you’d have to ask them a bit more.

BACKGROUND + PERSONALITY.

born and raised in berlin, germany until his mother decided to move to the us when basil was twelve.

despite growing up bilingual, he had difficulties adjusting to the new surroundings and rather spent his free time drawing, eventually building up universes without needing any context and instead having the designs speak for themselves.

after finishing high school at age sixteen basil took a gap year to travel through europe with money they earned from several jobs during school times. bas was v very introverted back then, so it served as a challenge which once again they had difficulties with at first. but ofc you can’t get around without trying, so bas did. he’s still more of an ambivalent than an extrovert, but this journey made him see the beauty of uncertainty and they loved it.

also ik i used he & they in that last paragraph instead of just one bc basil honestly truly doesn’t care which one others use as long as they acknowledge bas isn’t cis bc he’s v open about his gender along with being pan .. but that’s another thing.

basil has a very high iq, but always prevented others from knowing about it. he basically failed tests on purpose back in germany and in the us he always made sure others don’t feel bad about their results and said his were worse even though he probably always got an a+, thus resulting in bas being able to skip two grades.

his mother had to carry two jobs to make a living for the two of them, which was one of the reasons why bas sold his art from a young age. thankfully it was actually decent ( coughs and looks @ ryan reynolds’ twitter ) and ppl actually wanted to pay good money for it. this was also one of the key moments in which bas realized they wanted to have their profession somewhere in the art department.

married his high school sweetheart in las vegas as soon as they both turned eighteen, but divorced just three weeks later. this is just one of their impulsive decisions as bas isn’t much of a planner, they rather have a few good laughs when telling the story ( even for the 10th time ) instead of asking what if. the only thing bas ever truly planned was becoming a comic book artist. they’re still at the very beginning as basil’s v young, but they’re just as determined to make it in the industry.

basil’s mother was always into greek mythology and even gave her child the middle name cerberus, which literally is the most dangerous thing about him and while he’s into mythology himself, he doesn’t really tell anyone his middle name as he’d rather not be compared to a three-headed dog .. but if he ever ends up drunk u can bet he’d insist on being called cerberus and nothing else.

being a comic book artist basil’s an avid comic reader as well, but mostly prefers indie comics as they’re more his kind of humor. speaking of, basil’s more of a morbid humor kind of pal ? but he’ll also immediately apologize if he takes it too far bc he values comfort even more than getting a laugh out of others and himself.

huge fan of dogs, literally the person that points at a dog and says “aw.” and definitely wants to pet them.

the least scorpio-like scorpio you will ever meet, and trust me this is coming from a Real Scorpio™.

ends up in a lot of weird scenarios while just trying their best, but always tries to take it with humor especially if someone’s with them.

most of his friends wouldn’t expect it, but basil’s very romantic, like going all out even for a first date and is probably doing waay too much for his opposite.

not really into the whole sex, drugs n rock ‘n’ roll as he prefers to maybe drink a few beers with his closest friends due to seeing what alcohol can do to people on an almost daily basis as a bartender. however, all of kian’s tattoos are canon for bas except for the native american and butterfly ones.

WANTED PLOTS.

literally everything but to be basic .. a best friend ( who might even know about his high iq bc he truly doesn’t tell anyone ), bad influence ( basil’s not exactly innocent or good himself but there’s always worse am i right ), childhood friend ( someone he considered a friend after moving to a completely new country ), enemy ( maybe they’re of the opposite group or even in the same and they had some fight that led to it or just disliking each other for apparently no reason at all just .. pls give me smth negative ), ex on good/bad terms ( as basil’s pretty romantic it could’ve been too much for the other or literally any other reason k thanks ), someone who hates his jokes ( plain n simple .. kewl ), my brain is scattered bc it’s almost 2am rn so i Def missed 820397 plots i’d love but u know what .. i’m a plot pro so shrugs. also i nearly wrote pro plot so u get me now .. pls killme KMDSX.

☾ — ·˚ » SAINT DEVERAUX is in saint tropez !! they often get mistaken as ALISSA VIOLET. apparently, SHE arrived from THE USA. they’re a TWENTY-ONE year old UNLABELED CIS FEMALE. i hear they’re known as VIGOROUS and DETACHED. they also make their living as an ACTRESS but you’d have to ask them a bit more.

BACKGROUND + PERSONALITY.

just as a small disclaimer: if anyone read girls on fire by robin wasserman, saint’s personality is heavily inspired by one of the characters in it aka lacey. and if u haven’t read it .. pls do it if you’re even just remotely into ya literature.

born and raised in los angeles, us, saint was practially thrown into the lives of the rich and famous. her parents were big in hollywood back in the 80s & 90s and gave those legacies to her.

being practially raised by nannies, saint didn’t really have a connection to her parents till they retired when she was fourteen. from there it was basically always good which is .. v weird but they somehow made it work.

as soon as saint turned eighteen she decided to change her last name to her mother’s maiden name, as she’s never been a fan of women having to give up their names just for being married even if it’s voluntary. this also resulted in her imdb page ( she truly made it huh. ) being “divived” into saint bartowski ( also shoutout @ anyone who gets this ref ) and saint deveraux.

at age eighteen saint also let out her true self, at least towards her parents. she admitted to worshipping lucifer just to piss them off and see how they’d react, it was just a game for her. but to be as convincing as possible, she did the most, even though she would’ve already had them just with her words, but saint always wanted to know just how far she could take it.

to the public she’s seen as this socialite turned actress who never did anything wrong, but just due to her parents and herself keeping everything under a neat little rug.

saint’s a very passionate person and loves to be surrounded or admired by people, but at the same time she doesn’t really care about anyone, no matter how many i love yous she’s going to whisper into someone’s ear or no broken promises ever.

as a result of the press putting labels onto her 24/7 she resents them. the only one she’ll ever claim is being in the lgbtq+ com as it’s basically the only thing in her life she truly cares about besides acting and her cats. however saint also makes a lot of fun of men and highly prefers females and nb pals for .. u know what.

she can also be extra af as she literally bought an old vw t1 bus in st. tropez for the short amount of time she’s there and have it look exactly like the one she has back in la with the pride flag sprayed on its roof and every little sticker/detail on its doors, etc.

getting to her job .. she currently stars in a made up netflix show that’s somewhere between veronica mars, twin peaks and 21 jump street ( the movie version ). i actually made a whole filmography for her but i’m too lazy for graphics and i’m not even sure whether i can use real movies/shows so oo. but if u want a list i can tots send it via disc*rd ( btw mine is artcmis#4377 ). and just know that she admires amber heard and mostly chooses roles like her aka not the damsel in distress. tho she would def love to save that kind of character one day .. js.

this is getting soo messy already omg. but to put her in a nutshell, saint’s a callous, manipulative, control loving, determined scorpio who also happens to be an actress, cat lover and feminist putting up a facade daily. also she can’t handle relationships for shhhit.

and what would these bullet points be if i didn’t start and finish them with a disclaimer ? still a mess yeah ik .. MXKAJD. but even tho most probs don’t even know who alissa is i just wanted to say that saint will have green eyes bc .. #aesthetic.

WANTED PLOTS.

once again any plot goes except for romantic stylez kind of plots bc yk not her kind of thing. catfish ( either someone used to catfish someone else using her pics or even better someone got catfished with her photos n now they’re meeting and she’s .. acting v different. plS. ), fwb ( so yeah saint hates relationships but u know what she doesn’t hate wink wink ;) KMSLASK also probs won’t work with males bc she’s all like [ cher horowitz vc ] as if ! ), fan ( someone who likes her movies or show idk ?? let her be all chill with them pls ), smoke bud ( she loves to party & smoke soo .. maybe even in an all-in-one with the fan plot ), enemy ( probs one of the other sec charas bc maybe they’ve met before or even wanted the same role ?? ), once again my brain is a mess sooo .. good bi !

this got longer than my biography ever could so if u read it all .. u truly are the mvp and deserve an award.

[survivormarmoreal]

Episode #13: "im so EMO (TION)" - Bryce

I cant believe that im still here. And we have majority. 3 vs 2. Matt is coming to me know saying that he wants to work with me but like. Bruh. But that could be good tho having him. I have to see what happens with immunity first.

OKOKOKOK CAN WE JUST DISCUSS HOW AM I A FUCKING GOAT. FIRST OF ALL Jock destroyers was a pretty dominant alliance i played a SNITCH RAT GAME with exposing plans and i was lied to but like can i get some credit here like first of all it was my fucking ideal to even force a tie, bryce wanted sharky out he didn't want rocks i wanted rocks when my ass was literally on the line here and i was still willing to go to rocks because i don't want to be a fucking goat and do what bryce or sharky wants this is the only way i could get brian SHARKYS #1 ALLY out of the game so that you know who sharky's #1 ALLY IS NOW FUCKING ME. so you know what yeah i'm a goat, greatest of all time actually and i at least deserve some level of credit or respect here to pull some shit off like this. only person on the fucking tribe with the balls to do this shit and i don't even have balls. OK BYE.

i literally dont have words. i keep having meltdowns and like its so not like me i usually just treat games as fun but im just so upset bc brian went home when we could have prevented it and now im in a spot where annabelle and sharky control things and im basically going to get 5th. i really thought i was doing something and life came at me real quick and said learn ur place KJFSHKJDFHSKJ. like the play anna made was smart so go her i just hate that i got played and that brian left with the vote steal and that my game is ruined and i came so far and i thought i was playing alright also i hate how everyone and their mother keeps calling me out for playing the middle KJSFHFKS like grow up and shade me in ur confessionals not to my face im SENSITIVE AUBRY. basically the point is: https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/506665419092918273/541697763788980225/image0.jpg

I'm SHOCKED. I swore to Annabelle I wouldn't right her name down. And yet she writes my name down! And just as I was thinking I could trust Bryce HE RALLIES VOTES AGAINST ME! I'm so pissed off, and scared, and hurt, and now I have to scramble to figure something out.

Okay let recap everything that has gone down in this 24 hours since I was betrayed. So I talked to Annabelle A LOT. Basically we've talked to each other a ton. I discover that Anna made the plan for the tie and then Bryce was only willing to flip if the vote was for me. SHADY. I knew I should have never trusted him. So basically either I convince Annabelle to save me, everyone goes to rocks, or Matt and Brian flip on me and I go home. I would have said the last one was super unlikely. So I start busting my ass to sway Annabelle. We have really opened up to each other about our games, she is feeling like she has to make a big move. I talked to her about how I feel hurt because I've busted my ass all game to save Anna and Matt and now they both seem unwilling to save me. I tell the guys we just have to be nice but imply to her she stands no shot of making the end without me and how Bryce is going to win. She has no idea we have the vote steal so Brian/Matt would definitely get Bryce out next. So I go to sleep thinking we are making progress. I wake up an Anna is like "Matt was rude to me so I'm definitely not flipping" so I'm starting to feel really hopeless. And then Matt and Brian both started to dodge the idea of rocks. And Anna is telling me Bryce thinks Matt is probably going to flip. So i'm thinking it's over. And in the FB Bois chat Matt and Brian both keep being like "I'm so conflicted" "we'd be guaranteed f4" "blah blah blah" So now I'm realizing these two aren't willing to go to rocks for me. I've spent this whole season trying to save our alliance at any cost. And now that I'm the one in danger...they aren't willing to take the risk. SO now I get it. I've been too nice. If they are going to put their games above mine and aren't willing to risk it so all 3 of us can make F5...I'm going to have to make sure we take that risk because it's my only shot. So I pitch to Anna a way she can get her rocks and I can be safe. We tell them that Anna agrees to save me. That way they think were set and it'll all work out and then it'll go to rocks and I'll be safe. It's super risky and I'm putting all my faith in Annabelle and I feel so scared and guilty and idk but this is the only way I survive and there is a chance Anna goes and it all works out. But...it's also not lost on me that Anna is willing to risk her own game to save me...but my own alliance isn't. I'm feeling...weird.

Brian went home. I...honestly am just feeling horrible. And he was so mad at me. Like mad to the point that I'm worried I ruined a real life friendship over this game. And Matt is furious too and he's going off on me in our group chat which fucking sucks. Like that was the worst case scenario for me. And it sucks. But I shouldn't have to feel bad about this. Like both Brian and Matt were willing to vote me out so they didn't have to go to rocks. They put their game first so why am I a villain for doing the same thing? And they want to be like "we were up front with you about not being sure" like that's supposed to make me feel better. Yeah of course you were honest you weren't the ones in danger. It's easy for y'all to be honest when you're just going to vote me out. I couldn't have been honest with them or they would have flipped and I would have gone home. How do they not see that? Was I supposed to just give up? How is that fair? And how is it that they can vote me out and I just have to accept that but they can't accept that I saved myself. I'm feeling super alone, like I can't trust anybody, and like my best friends won't even take a second to look at it from my point of view. Of course I feel terrible. I just hope this doesn't come between genuine friendships.

ANNA REALLY JUST CLOCKS ME AND SHE KNOW SHE CAN BC WHAT ELSE AM I GOING TO DO. me matt maynor better be this f3 matt might win tbh but idc! anna has CROSSED ME and like laughs in my face FKJADSHFKAJ like yes ur iconic yes u did #that but im in this game with u and its a lil rude to flaunt ur success at me FKJADSHFAKJ when i do sth good i would never constantly bring it up (btw i won immunity once and got that cute blue color so everyone is jealous prob...) also im so emo i miss dennis and i miss brian they were the 2 ppl who i felt close to in the game and theyre both gone i literally am so upset i feel like if i wasnt so busy before tribal i could have talked to brian more and convinced him he had to vote sharky bc i KNEW anna was voting sharky but he bought her lies and i was convincing enough so i just feel its my fault i lost my closest ally (and his vote steal) although maybe he would have beat me in the end so this is good thing? nope! like i think i played alright in the middle but ppl prob wont respect it and idk if i would bc clearly im biased and maybe i am just a goat and thats why im still in like i rly tried to do sth this round but didnt i just ugh so demotivated hehe but maybe ill snap or sth insert positive uplifting quote here i just hope that i can turn this around and defeat anna and her pet shark. ALTHOUGH ITS LIKE WHERE THE BIG DOG PULLS ITS OWNER AND WALKS IT INSTEAD OF THE OTHER WAY AROUND. im so EMO (TION)

yesterday i was feeling a LOT of emotions and now that i have distanced myself i realize that my emotions were VALID and i am perfect and had the RIGHT to be upset that everything went wrong. i am speaking my immunity win into existence it WILL happen. i HAVE done the homework and even if i flop it (which i wont) i will still NOT GO HOME bc matt and maynor are hopefully on my side. OK BUT LIKE IM JUST SO JKAFSHKAJDSFHADSKFJA

This immunity is very important. We cant let Matt or Sharky win it. We need to have the opinion for them available to be voted out.

So like.... I am upset and feel very alone now in this game. Brian got rocked out and i was lied to again. I am just like so over it. I feel manipulated when I did have all the power and could've got a big threat out. but NO sharky and anna the fucking dynamic duo they are decided it would be fun to go to rocks! I am just so over it. Im getting fucking 5th place and I am MAD.

OR AM I? I decided to lie last night and say i gave my idol to brian last night. Why? It would paint an even bigger target on my back so i can go idoling. Cause of course I am not dumb enough to go and give my idol away hell naw. Instead, I need to knock sharky out of the immunity comp tonight but then get everyone on my case so they vote me. then boom idol. i know that this should get me to f3. I hope. If sharky goes next, and anna/maynor win FIC. then i know i can get at least maynor with me cause Bryce will then be the clear winner out of us 4. then maybe i will have a shot at the win but eh, need to get there first. I hope to god this can work and if not, final juror here i come!

I woke up feeling TERRIBLE. I feel so bad about the Brian situation. Matt won't respond because he probably hates me. I feel like a trash person. And tbh I'm questioning if I even deserve to be here.

I feel sick. Literally this is the worst case scenario. If anybody else had won everything would be fine. And now Matt has like given up which makes me even sadder. I'm honestly considering asking everybody to vote me out. So that Matt at least has a shot of making FTC. This sucks.

I WON IMMUNITY WOOOH IM SO ICONIC IM LITERALLY A LOSING FINALIST AND EVERYONE WANTS ME OUT I FEEL LIKE ILL LOSE IN THE END BUT THAT WONT STOP THESE PPL FROM GIVING ME 4TH WHEN I LOSE THE NEXT IMMUNITY AJKFDSHKFAJ THEYRE ALL LIKE SO VISIBLY DISAPPOINTED I WON IM SO SAD NNNN I WOULD BE HAPPY FOR THEM! i really hope they vote out sharky now bc its literally the smart move but im willing to bet theyll keep him to spite me annas gonna be like sharky needs to stay we get him out NEXT round and maynor might be convinced or sth idk and matt idk askdjfhdkjf i thought we were good but he ghosted me all day today so hm. club 96 nina and tina really falling apart

Matt is literally shutting down. Like I'm trying to talk with him and mend things and try to rally him so we can figure out how to keep us both safe and honestly he's just not interested. He seems disinterested and honestly he's being kind of a brat. Stop pouting! Sack up and help me fight. Because yes I was selfish last round and that put us in a tough spot but It was never my idea to trust Bryce or my idea to ignore that we had a vote steal to secure our vote at F6. I'm not the only one who made mistakes. So come on and let's freaking recover! Or are we just supposed to lay down and award Bryce the win? UGH

I was really on the brink of asking everybody to vote me out. But Matt is being so useless right now. If he's going to act like that he'll just get picked off at F4. He has no fight. So I'm over it. I really do love him but at this point I'm going to have to just try my best to get Annabelle and Maynor to believe that they stand the best chance at FTC against me, instead of Bryce or Matt. I've already ruined my reputation so I might as well at least try to fight. I feel over everything but I have to get it together.

The vote hopefully is between Matt and Sharky. I know Bryce really wants Sharky gone. Annabelle and I are talking and seeing which route is the best for us to make it to the end.

Like wow. My brain is so big. Im pretending that I threw away my idol to brian at the last second, and that I am leaving this round. Whereas in actually reality I still have my idol and sure as heck im playing it tonight and making final 4 YEET. like woe is me, woe is me, lol no bitch im here to stay. Sharky like, needs to leave as well. I love him but 2 big if a threat and I would quite like to well, win.

Oh and as I write this annabelle needs me huh. Well listen here, you lied to my fucking face and got brian out. Thus, you also need to leave bish. I am fed up of being lied 2 constantly by these fuckers called my tribemates and I am NOT here for it anymore. Time to play the lies and deceit game myself huh

This round is so weird for me. I felt like I was in such a tough place and feeling really defeated. But now Anna is getting paranoid and there is a very slim chance I could get her to to vote Maynor and then Matt and I both make F4. But my issues is I can't trust anybody. Because I don't think anybody trusts me. Like Maynor is being very noncommittal. Anna keeps flip flopping and maybe she'll flip onto me. Matt seems on board but honestly maybe he deeply deeply hates me and is just lying and will vote me out.

There is a little over an hour left before tribal. I'm convinced that it's me going home. Everyone seems to be too easy to agree to vote with me. It's not looking good.

Literally wtf. The Biggest plot twist of the century is occurring. I'M THE SWING VOTE?? Like since when in hell was I going to be the deciding factor. I mean I like it, I have the power for once and I am safe but still omg i LOVE IT! I am bunsen the Berner in this image, deciding between 2 fates: https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DzD8lXwUwAAgTlp?format=jpg&name=900x900

Having a panic attack. Im really nervous. Like i know its between Matt and Sharky. But there is still a chance that somehow me or annabell could still go. I hope it doesnt and its clear cut with Sharky and Matt. Fingers cross. Or imma die.

i had a good talk with anna today and i kind of love her (as long as she votes sharky) i think maynor might go now which is sad bc anna says matt/sharky are doing that but like matt says that he wants me maynor him f3 so who knows! anna like was honest with me about not knowing who to vote and seems to be voting sharky but literally anything can happen so whomst knows.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH okokok i feel so fucking badly about this move like so badly ughhhhhhhhhh but i feel like it has to happen i'm so so soooo sorry sharky like you have no idea i've been torn all day on what i should do and idk i feel like i lose no matter what this fucking blows

Sharky is voted out 4-1.