Genuine question: What do you think of the argument that very white-passing folks — even if they have black parents, grandparents, etc. — cannot call themselves black?
Personally I think whether or not you're black depends on your actual lived reality. My nephew is white passing. He's from the sister who is about the same tone as me, just a little lighter, and the same racial mixture of Irish and afronative, and his very German father. He's got white skin and blonde hair and blue eyes and genuinely if you didn't know that little boy was technically black you would not guess it.
However. He lives with his visibly black mother, his visibly black sister (same racial mix as him, she just got the darker genes), and their visibly black stepfather and visibly black stepsiblings. He's the odd man out, the lightest of the group, and the one that looks like he doesn't belong. And, when you see him next to his family... suddenly the white skin and blonde hair and blue eyes don't cut it for determining his whiteness, because you start to notice that he shares a whole lot of features with the darker skinned members of his family.
Like me, he's put his foot down about his blackness. If asked at school why he's white but his family is black, he will outright state that he's mixed race and that he is actually black and white just like his sister and mother. He's not wrong. He IS black and white and no small part Native, though I think the complexity of the last part is hard for him to grasp at his elementary school level understanding of race politics.
But what is his reality? Well, when he's with his white father, or my white (passing) mother, he's white. Until he opens his mouth to defend his sister or his mother or a friend of his from racism, at which point said racist's eyes laser-focus on every minute detail of his face to pick out the non-European features covered in pale skin.
This is honestly pretty similar to how a Jewish friend of mine describes her experience, how she is white until she opens her mouth to say something positive about Judiasm or negative about antisemitism, at which point every possible Jewish feature on her face comes under intense scrutiny and her white status is revoked immediately. It's also why I'm always on this "antisemitism 🤝 antiblackness" thing.
I also have a Hungarian friend who is equally peeved at the flattening of racial nuance, as he and his family consider themselves mixed race and Eurasian and not just white, however he has had equal amount of people hurting him for his more blatantly Asian features as he's had people telling him he never experiences racism because he's a white European. Similarly, his reality is that he's white until he says something that doesn't align with white supremacy's rules on white opinion and white behavior, at which point every single Asian feature he has is used as punishment against him.
It's not to say that my nephew, my Jewish friend, or my Hungarian friend don't benefit from their perceived whiteness. They do, in fact! My nephew again is a bit young to have this conversation, but my friends have also discussed with me how they have seen that perception occasionally give them a boost as they move through life. And how, if they would want to keep that boost, they'd have to lean into the concept of whiteness and erase a significant portion of their identities in the process.
This is also spoken about at length by Natives forced to assimilate and intermarry with white people to "breed out the savage", as it were. And I know of lightskinned, though imo not white passing, black people who have discussed the same thing. This even is discussed by people in the Irish, Italian, Greek, and Polish diaspora here in the US- how their current status of "white" came at the cost of not only erasing huge portions of their own culture and history but also practically requires them to lean into white supremacy in order to continue to reap the benefits of white privilege, and how the cost is so much higher than the gain especially when you understand that it doesn't work. You can be One Of The Good Ones all you like and someone dedicated to racism is still going to hate you even once you've gotten rid of all the obvious poc.
To put it simply, these aren't new conversations and I'm never going to be anywhere remotely close to "white-passing" so it's sort of a moot point for me. It's not my reality. But I think listening to those who have lived it is better for gaining a more solid understanding. I don't think that my nephew is wrong to call himself black or mixed black. It's technically true, he came out of a black woman. I also think he is going to have a very different life from his sister, from his mother, from his stepfather and stepsiblings, from his black extended family.
I think rejection from the black community would only hurt him, because he is growing up surrounded by black people in a black family learning black culture, so someone telling him that he shares the same features and DNA but his skin is too light to find community there is just hurtful. Who does it help? Who does it protect? To tell a little kid that he can't call himself part of his own family?
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hi! do you have any advice on how to get started writing disabled characters? like, get over that fear and start putting the pen to paper? I have my research and my character and stuff but Im nervous that Im gonna fuck it up and make bad representation. how do you think is the way to determine I’ve written a character “good enough” in representing a disability?
Hi!
If you have a character and done research, you're already doing pretty good! I don't think that there is some magical way to know if what you're writing is "good enough", mostly because people will have different standards when it comes to representation.
The best thing you can do is try your best and be open to feedback from your disabled readers. I think that also questioning why you're doing certain things with your character can be helpful, because we all have biases (myself included obviously). I often see people have their characters with facial differences be "edgy, violent, dark past, etc." with the author defending it as "they just are like that!" but at the end of the day, it's a fictional character that a human being made, the character doesn't have free will. So if your worry is bad rep, sit down and try to figure out what exactly it is that bothers you, and examine it - why does it worry you? is this attached to some bias? are abled characters treated in a similar way, or is the disabled one singled out? what are the elements that could be inaccurate, and if yes, why are they like that?
Obviously, you can't catch every single issue that could ever occur, because that's impossible for anyone. But I'm absolutely sure that if writers simply thought about their choices a bit more, the general state of representation would be miles ahead of what we currently have.
Some of my suggestions to help with the fear of starting:
Consider basing the character off someone you know with the same disability. Try to think if your recreation of that is true to how they exist or not so much. If you have a real example of the kind of person you're trying to represent, it's much easier to catch yourself writing something that doesn't make sense. It also helps that you could ask them a specific question about what you're writing and get some first-hand information that theoretical research doesn't generally give.
Perhaps start with disabilities that aren't as impactful on the character's life. (Start is a bit of a key word, because I absolutely want people to write more severely/moderately disabled characters too). Obviously, disability is disabling, but there will be a difference between writing a character with mild photophobia and a character with high level complete quadriplegia. There's just ultimately fewer things that you have to consistently consider, and that can be helpful when starting. And once you're more comfortable writing disabled characters, you can diversify the kinds of characters that you include!
Honestly, if you did your research and aren't falling into any basic tropes, the vast majority of disabled readers will forgive the small inaccuracies (unless you're going to be writing about a character having a seizure and someone else putting an object in their mouth. We are going to correct that because that's dangerous). E.g. if your character with a large scar is portrayed respectfully and kindly, I will look over the lack of mentions of nerve damage because though it is nice to see as well, that's not the main thing I'm looking for. If I was looking for 100% accurate writing about disability, I would be reading non-fiction by disabled writers.
If you have the specific character mostly conceptualized and are willing to share, feel free to just send us the background and parts that worry you, and we will try to give some hopefully useful feedback! =)
Thanks for the ask! I hope it's helpful
mod Sasza
I agree with everything Sasza has said! I'm adding a couple of my own thoughts:
If you are really stuck and really don't have any specific ideas on what disabilities you want to write about, try adding a little randomization. You can search for something like "common disabilities in [character's age group]" or "common health conditions in [character's geographic location]" and pick one at random. Roll dice if you need to! I'm not saying this to be glib or dismissive – I know I can often get stuck when it comes to making decisions, which includes creative decisions like making characters. The aspect itself of getting stuck can be a little intimidating. So if an aspect of randomness helps you get unstuck, you can dive into more specific research a bit more easily – like, if the dice roll led you to cerebral palsy, then you can focus on researching cerebral palsy instead of trying to think of all the possible things you could choose for your character.
You can visit a couple of websites for different conditions and disabilities, including subReddits. I don't mean to start participating in these discussions, but it helps to see disabilities in a context that isn't just "this is how you/your family member will be diagnosed and this is how the treatment will be." It can feel confusing and a little lost to only see disabilities in that context, so seeing it in a broader way – like people just talking about their life experiences – can help take some of the intimidation factor away.
And I just want to reiterate, if you focus on writing with care and treating your character like a full person of their own with their own inner world, agency, and ability to take part in the story, if you make mistakes it will not be the end of the world. The thing I want the most out of disabled characters is for them to be people more than they are tropes.
Hope this helps!
– mod sparrow
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Pink Pick-A-Pile (from 08.28.2022)
LMFAOOA IDK WHY I USED THIS PICTURE!!
but before reading, please realize when i made this, i was in a My Hero Academia reality shifting community. Currently, I am no active there, so if you find these posts,,, yes they were me. LMFAOOAOAO and some of this blog has been edited for my sanity.
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[ 🖊 ] created ⋮ 27.8.22
[ ] published ⋮ 27.8.22
˚₊·͟͟͟͟͟͟͞͞͞͞͞͞➳❥ ꒰ ⌨ ✰ Arsyn ⋆ ⁱˢ ᵗʸᵖⁱⁿᵍ··· ꒱ | ೃ࿔₊•
┊ ⋆ welcome to my blog !
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hi lovelies!! changing what i did last time for a pick a pile, im going to be doing a more motivational one!
by no means does it mean im going to be all nice, im just going to praise you and all that you and all you’re doing. its just gonna be less about WHAT and more about HOW you can change it and also motivating you to do more/what other things you can do to help you shift faster (if you’re still working to your first attempt) or how you can positively change your shifting journey. also you guys know i can be kind of blunt and then the alice in wonderland tarot is BRUTAL but im using the White Numen deck this time (which honestly is my nsfw deck LFMAJSUHNTE BUT I WANT AN EXCUSE TO USE THEM FOR A PICK A PILE!!!)
breathe in...
and out...
now please, pick a pile or two
Pile 1
Hello pile 1 and welcome to your reading!!
confirmation for this pile: 1111, angel numbers, reunions, supernatural dr, stability, not changing ‘im not seeing results’, pisces, water signs, christmas/yule, holidays, “its just out my reach”, unstable perspectives, cows, animals, outdoors
cards: the hanged man, knight of cups (r), six of wands, ace of swords
not even gonna lie, at first i got 11 cards.., i shuffled the 11 i got to make this pile smaller so i dont drain myself during the first pile jaoishtioeh
this pile is in either a state of waiting or a state of wanting change. you’re waiting for it and you’re working on it but its almost tiring? maybe you’re loosing the hope, motivation, the fire under your ass because of this waiting. i just remember that one blog that said that sometimes shifting is like a waiting game, i feel like thats the place you guys are right now.
in the kindest way possible, your emotions are out of wack. i feel a lot of stress, anger, hurt and just instability in emotions. maybe doing shadow work, vent art, sharing your feelings, poetry, etc. dont avoid these feelings because once you confront them and move on with life, it will be much easier.
again with being creative and venting in a not natural (?) way, ace of swords and six of wands is kinda like a ‘yeah do this.’ a nod in the right direction. being creative and changing the way you develop and think about things will help you a lot. you got this babes! you’ll get the big change you want when you start thinking outside the box. dont do the things you always used to do, but change the way you approach them and how you look at things. glass half full not half empty.
thank you pile one! i hope this resonates!!
Pile 2
hello pile 2! and welcome to your pile
heres confirmation: burning bridges, coming to an end, breaking negative cycles, “i know how it is”, not trustworthy, being pissed off and arrogant, 555, spiritual connection (soulmates, twin flames, etc), 888,666, snakes
cards: Temperance, the hierophant (r), 10 of wands (r), the lovers
okay wow the first thing i have to say is so many major arcana cards - literally i thought the would ALL be major
this pile seems burnt out in a way (no pun intended based on the pile image) and you need to find a way to light your flame again. dont give up, and dont be scared to ask for help. if you’re struggling with spiritual beliefs/shifting/your journey PLEASE ask for help. dont cry in silence. break free from any cycle you’ve been in. cleanse your energy and the energies around you. break ties with people who aren’t helping you in any way. who are negative in your life. hold your ground and speak what you think and know is right. dont let someone else control and manipulate you in any way. be powerful, because you are. you’re in control.
with temperance and the lovers coming out i feel like this is almost why you’re shifting/what keeps moving you to shift. its moving into your god/goddess energy. being that powerful being you are. being assertive and knowing what is right for you. when you’re shifting/thinking about shifting/making an attempt remember why you started. remember your past self and who you want to be in the future, and who you want to surround yourself with. the people? are they different? know how to control and change the situation if you need it. you got this okay? you’ll see who you want to see and be who you want to be.
thank you pile 2! i hope this resonated
Pile 3
hi pile 3!! literally accidently typed 333 so anyways
confirmation: 333, childhood, hello kitty, red, actions speak louder than words but its more about the effect on you life rather than what they did, water, ocean, 555, penguins
cards: five of wands (r), three of pentacles (r), death (r), the chariot, five of wands
okay first things first we have 3 reversed cards and thats like kinda?? because pile 3, accidently typing 333 and three of pentacles?? but lets move on
you’re moving away from hardships and being stuck in your own head and coming to terms and being at peace with your cr/or. you’re letting go of the things that made it bad and accepting them as memories and just things to hold on to and never let go of. more about the people than what they did.
are your goals not written out pile 3 and your true intentions behind them? or are you just not working to them? you may know your goals and not work to them, are you burnt out? take a break then! take care of yourself. you guys are the stubborn time but you need to listen to me when i say TAKE A BREAK ITS FOR THE BETTER! you may even shift on your break. you need to take a moment and be still because it will actually boost you forwards in the long run. sometime taking breaks helps you move forward. being able to take time and relight your candle. this will lead you to a peaceful and good ending. you can see the shore and you’re about to pull up.
honestly five of wands seems out of place to me, i ask spirit to give me cards in a way thats comprehensive and makes sense with the cards near/around it. it represents rivalry, conflict in a way. maybe spirit is saying on this break fix your relationship with someone, stop fighting and going back and forth. hold your ground, agree to disagree, and let go. also shifting isnt a race or competition, so dont rush it or you can get thrown off course.
thank you pile 3! i hope this resonated
Pile 4
confirmation: water, water signs, oceans, harmony, boobies , feet?? IN WATER??, “the universe must have divined this” - dove cameron’s ‘boyfriend’, bo burnham, “i gotta get out of here”, deities, blue, white, red, AMERICA
cards: two of wands, four of cups, six of swords, three of cups
okay so something i noticed right off the bat is there is a LOT of water i mean even in a card that supposedly represents air signs, shes in a boat in the water. anyways you guys are PLANNING unlike the last pile, you guys have a set out plan, goals, and reasoning. now you have a decision to make, are you going to look to external sources or work with yourself? i was called to get an oracle card bc you guys are different.
I got two cards actually, a time to give rather than take, new moon in virgo and a time for healing balsmic moon. so these cards, surprisingly, are saying the same thing. a change is coming, it may seem like its slow but its coming. i promise, and it will be surprising when it happens.
back again to tarot, because i actually only got to one card(!!) you guys are reevaluating and reflecting, i feel like you have been for a while, thinking and dwelling on the things you can change, have changed, and how far you’ve come (NOT GOODBYE BY BO BURNHAM COMING ON IM DONE walks out door ok im back.. but anyways) stop romanizing everything and look at it in worse case scenario vs best case. the best case was already stated, now look at it as the worst thing that can happen. make that like the fuel for your flame and dont let it hold you back, let it drive you forward. this is where six of swords comes in, you ARE moving forward and you will keep moving forward the more you do. you will heal (ORACLE!!) and you are healing. six of swords can also be interpreted as an escape. maybe shifting is an escape for you?
for the last card, 3 of cups is all about harmony, friendships and community.
i know a lot of people (AND I MEAN A LOT OF PEOPLE) have left the MHA shifting community recently, but keep close to the ones you need/have made an impact on you. maybe they’re leaving/have left but yk what you do? ask around. search and find. it reminds me of a bible verse “ask and you shall gain” or something like that. keep close to those who help you, keep the positive in your life not the negative. keep friends close okay? and talk to them, dont let go.
okay pile 4!! thats it, hope this resonated and you have a great day! also little side note, throughout writing this pick a pile i saw the lovers. so that may be important to some of you. im not putting it in confirmation because if you get this far down that means something for you.
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People who try to analyze what happened on Tumblr on November 5th, 2020, often really overstate how much it was actually “about” Supernatural. As someone who has never been in the supernatural fandom ever but dID join in on the hysterical destielposting—it was really more about the stress of the pandemic and the 2020 presidential election.
The two biggest Youtubers I’ve seen try to dissect “what happened that November 5th” in video essays both weren’t American—- and I think that explains why they both tried to explain the hysteria primarily via analyzing the Supernatural fandom/the original show, rather than through the lens of the election. And while those videos are cool, valid, informational, and make lots of really well-considered interesting points— I can tell you that me and almost all my mutuals had literally no knowledge or interest in the fact that “oh supernatural had made nods at the ship in the past but the creators were adamant that I wouldn’t be canon” or etc etc etc etc. the first time I learned about any of that context was way later, watching videos where people claimed that fandom history context (that I did not know anything about) was the actual reason for the hysteria.
But the reality is that people latched on to the Destiel stuff because it was a piece of big useless inane zero-stakes fandom news in a time when we were desperately waiting for serious high stakes election news. We were latching onto a “positive “ piece of inane stupid fandom news in a time of great stress, with all the desperation of a drowning man who latches onto whatever piece of wood will keep him afloat.
The core of the hysteria was that Americans (who make up a huge chunk of tumblr’s userbase) were currently glued to their laptops watching the live presidential election vote counts come in. These vote counts were taking an extended amount of time due to the pandemic causing high numbers of mail-in ballots, resulting in a constant state of Election Day Stress for multiple days straight.
This was also during the height of the Pandemic. People had predicted Trump’s presidency would be bad; no one had predicted it would be this apocalyptically bad. No one had predicted pandemics and lockdowns and hospitals overflowing with bodybags. remember Trump spreading Covid lies and conspiracies?? There were so many Qanon conspiracies about democrats being Satanic child traffickers who had to be put to death, and coup threats were mounting from the right wing side. It seemed like this election was a choice between ‘centrist democrat’ and “apocalyptic right wing conspiracy theory authoritarianism,” in the midst of pandemic conditions that people feared would never ever improve— and it seemed like a close election.
Another major point was that Trump voters were more likely to be antimaskers/Covid deniers, while Biden voters were more likely to take the pandemic seriously— so Biden voters were more likely to send in mail-in ballots instead of risking the in-person voting crowds, which meant their ballots would take much longer to count. And so, in many state electoral vote counts, it would initially seem like Trump was very far in the lead— only for Biden to slooooowly build up an agonizingly small lead as the mail in ballots came in, and then defeat Trump at the very end.
So you’re just watching these news sites giving live election updates, refreshing the page every 2 minutes to see if you’re going to live under a spineless centrist democrat or a literal Qanon Dictatorship. And then you go on tumblr to distract yourself, and there’s more election posting, and more agonizing over the votes, and more stress and despair—-
And then it’s been days and we’re right at the crucial tipping point where it’s anyone’s game and the next few hours will determine whether Trump will win, so you need to keep your eye on the vote count, because the next hours will determine the future of the pandemic and your country and your plans for your entire life—
And then stupid Destiel becomes canon! And it becomes canon in the silliest way possible!
If Destiel had become canon at any other time, it would have been a big goofy tumblr celebration? But we wouldn’t have gotten the insane explosion of hysterical interaction.
The entire core of it was the contrast between the inane meaningless stupidity of fandom news vs the actual stressful election news you wanted to hear! It really is best conveyed in that meme where Castiel says “I love you” and Dean indifferently responds with a piece of important election news.
It’s about the contrast between the low-stakes inanity of fandom and the massive life-destroying stakes of a terrifying election. There really was no reason it had be Supernatural specifically, except that Supernatural was a thing everyone knew basic things about from dashboard osmosis— it could’ve been any other equally huge silly fandom ship news about a ship everyone *knew of* but might not necessarily be invested in (ex. Stucky becoming canon, Johnlock becoming canon, Kirk/Spock becoming more canon somehow, etc etc etc.)
I think it’s true that people who weren’t paying agonizingly close attention to the American election news got swept up in it, and that non American Supernatural fans also were extremely excited for purely fandom reasons — but the entire reason it blew up to an unprecedented degree was because of that core of stressed out terrified Americans glued to their computers watching election results and suddenly receiving stupid fandom news instead, and deciding to just hysterically parodically hyper-celebrate this absurd useless zero-stakes news.
I think it was also all elevated by the fact that, as I said before, this happened at the crucial “tipping point” of the election where the next few hours would determine the winner. The fact that Biden began to slowly develop a lead in the hours after made it feel, hysterically, as if the hours after Destiel became canon was somehow the turning point where he began to win; so celebrating Destiel felt like celebrating that slow turn towards victory.
The tl,dr is that it’s so important to Remember the Fifth of November …..in preparation the inevitable hysteria that will happen in the presidential election on November 5th of next year. XD. Personally I’m rooting for Johnlock or Frodo/Sam to somehow become canon in the eleventh hour right before the democrats win
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louis was like "this is the love of my life...... the vampire armand....."
and I was like "girl...... you're both bottoms...... traumatized bottoms with daddy issues....... where are ur shitty boyfriends??????"
louis and armand out here having the world's most boring pathetic sex, they're like "we're so healthy, we have grown past our shitty-boyfriend-having phase, now we're always Safe Sane And Consensual 😌 we don't have unhinged sex anymore 😌😌😌" they are going insane. this is why louis is having a mental breakdown. he's been having intensely hinged sex for 77 years, like 100% slow lovemaking with clear communication and so much lube and always "one finger, two finger, three finger, cock" and the traffic-light consent system in place even though they don't practice any kinks that would involve words like "stop" and "hang on a sec" meaning anything but literally that. no one in this house has been rimmed in 77 years. Every night they have a very polite Discussion (it's not an argument, it's not) about whose turn it is to top because nobody here wants to. louis is not built to handle this psychologically. lestat's going to text him "hey mon cher miss u sooooo much i can't live without you, haha i got your number by killing some people at your phone company, actually several phone companies because i didn't know which network you're on, anyway come over and sit on my face WINK WINK i'll do that thing you like so much, you know the one!! the one where you're always like 'ew lestat you're so gross' but then it makes you come so hard you pass out [eggplant emoji, eggplant emoji, water drops emoji, blood drop emoji]" louis is going to see these texts and go into a fugue state and be OUT! THAT! DOOR! in nanoseconds. NANOSECONDS!!!! meanwhile lestat is double- and triple- and quadruple-texting about how he's always wanted to try roadhead and blithely using words like "pussy" in reference to louis' anatomy without asking if that's cool and also sending seven unsolicited dick pics clearly taken in an airplane bathroom
armand has never sent a dick pic in his life, even a solicited one, because it's "crass" and there are "privacy concerns" and he's "unsatisfied with the current standard of end-to-end encryption technology". lestat doesn't even know what end-to-end encryption is, and if he did he wouldn't care about it because "if a hacker is going to all that trouble to look at my nude photographs, louis, i think they've earned them :))) even though they could just follow me on instagram and tiktok or sign up for my onlyfans" this is why armand about to get dumped at terminal velocity. he doesn't even have instagram.
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