#and also maybe hoping for recommendations for any other good playthroughs

[disneyprincette]

i see a lot of people saying it’s just men on youtube playing mouthwashing and not picking up on the implications of what happened to anya but i’ve been going out of my way to watch women playing it and uh. so far it’s proven to be a pretty gender neutral thing

[tekehu]

hi op hope you're having a good day! i'm starting another origins playthrough soon and i saw the alistair gifset you posted earlier and was wondering if there are any other mods you would personally recommend using? companion or otherwise!

when i started da:o again i was actually thinking about compiling a mod list for my usual dragon age set ups, though i ended up being too lazy, maybe in the next couple of days/weeks!

in the meantime, idk if you saw but i put the name + mod author in the notes of that post. i'd honestly recommend anything made by ChaoticNeuThrall, they have some more head replacers too as well as other great mods (i really love the world map replacer). ellise's unique complexion for companions is what i also always use, just make sure to remove the respective folders if you use any of the head replacers. i also love a year with sten, or if you prefer something more close to his original, sten of the beresaad. and because i like consistency, da2 marethari (delete the merrill files) and da2 looking merrill. the two moons circle is something that's also always missing. for the goodest baby i use dai doggo, and also the nug replacer, wolf replacer and high dragon replacer.

there's also bigger general overhauls like the unofficial remaster and environment overhaul i use, just make sure that you don't have any double files. i could go on but i'd say these are some of my faves. i'll maybe work on that mod list soon. anyway, hope this helped a little!

[myimaginedcorner]

SCALES OF JUSTICE - CHAPTER 8 UPDATE!!!

Hello again, my dearest readers! It hasn't been too long, this time. As promised, here I am with a new update, one that I hoped to make quick and small, but that resulted to be, as usual, a standard chapter. Oh well, these are better news for you: Chapter 8 is now available to play!! With it, we officially set ourselves to see the finish line, for Chapter 9 will be the next and LAST chapter in this book. One final push, one final battle, and everything will move to clear and clarify. Will you prevail, will you fight back to back, or will you see the cracks grow wider under your feet? The time of answers nears us - choose wisely.

I'm also noticing a new pattern in my update schedule, where I'm becoming awfully good at releasing chapters on a Monday... which isn't the brightest of my ideas. I only have another try, but I'll attempt to make it more reasonable.

As usual, I welcome any feedback, specially now that my beta-tester is quite occupied with her MSc (still a strong woman in STEM, still a prisoner to her project and her university. We shall remember her dearly). If you have any issues, recommendations, or comments in general about my work, feel free to text me here or make a post in CoG forum, where I will be answering you to the best of my capabilities. I tried my best to bring this update quickly - I checked for bugs, but I'm always very grateful for any help!

NEW THINGS IN THIS UPDATE:

Dine with Silver Demon, a man who's taken an odd interest in you.

Prepare to rest, and share the last moments of the passing day with someone... or with yourself.

Softlock available for TWO of the romance routes, and hardlock available for ONE of them. Will you choose to involve yourself in games of heart?

Number of saves increased from 3 to 5 slots.

Chapter 5 clothing options expanded - now, more choices are available to suit you best.

Chapter 8 is 63k words long. Some Sleepover scene routes might feel shorter than others, but all of them have overall around 8-10k worth of words between all choices. Replayability and length of playthrough vary from route to route!

KNOWN BUGS:

Sometimes, the image for Chapter 5's title doesn't appear at the beggining of the chapter. I'm unsure why, and thus the bug still persists.

DEMO DESCRIPTION AND USEFUL LINKS:

Scales of Justice is a fantasy game situated in another world, far away from Earth. There are plenty of species living together in harmony, but the human race is currently split in two civilisations: the one known as Hero kingdom, which is ruled by ‘heroes’, and the one named Vannais kingdom, controled by ‘villains’. Both nations hate each other and the fight between ‘heroes’ and ‘villains’ here is something that happens on a national level. The game is focused on lore, on character development and your own perception of the world: perhaps, your MC just wants to live a peaceful life... or maybe wants to save the world.

Or even rule it, if you’re into such things.

If you want to know a little more about this project and read 8 chapters, I'll leave the link to the game here -> https://dashingdon.com/play/myimaginedcorner/scales-of-justice/mygame/

If you want to discuss anything on CoG's forum, I'll leave the link for SoJ here -> https://forum.choiceofgames.com/t/wip-scales-of-justice-new-project-announcement-and-demo-release/101088/16

If you want to send me a more extensive feedback, here's my email -> feedbackscalesofjustice@gmail.com

Any mistakes, concerns or questions you have, feel free to contact me through Tumblr! I am very excited to share this story with all of you, and I want to make it as good as possible with your help!

RO DESCRIPTIONS:

Shoren/Seile -> Heir to the throne in Hero kingdom, where your journey starts. Also, your old friend who is very attached to you. Likes to read and practices magic, enjoys adventure and heroic deeds. A recognised “Hero”, with blonde curly hair, pale skin and a pair of beautiful blue eyes.

Robert/Reina -> Order's Paladin, defender of Hero and Knight of Fate itself. Brave and honourable, determined to protect the people of the kingdom. Very loyal to friends and very dangerous as an enemy. Has short brown hair, tanned skin and an athletic build.

Valerius/Venis -> An Outworlder, who was caught by cultists from the Wicked Woods. Gracious, elegant and charismatic. Has long dark brown hair with a silver streak, olive skin and golden eyes.

Arion/Aria -> Leader of Vannais, a recognised “Villain” who escaped from Hero and now rules the enemy kingdom. Serious, reserved and temperamental. Doesn’t like to stay behind hiding in the castle, thus always personally appears in battlefields and negotiations. Has short blonde hair, pale skin and greenish eyes.

Be careful! These characters have their thoughts and opinions on the world and your actions: if you want them to support you, convince them or take their side… or neither. That is your choice after all!

[kitkat-the-muffin]

Here I am, once again~ Playing Cloutchase with my friend~

Anyway hi! Welcome back to Muffy-Posts-Cloutchase-Spoilers!!! Here are the other two installments: [1][2]

I had SO MUCH fun playing Vol. 3 with my friend! She is amazing at doing impressions and gave YouTube and Twitch the perfect voices, I couldn't ask for anything more. But enough about her since she prefers to remain anonymous, today I am here to present my favorite screenshots from the latest release of Cloutchase!

Without further ado, here are the spoiler-free teases:

And there's the cut!

Aight let's do this

First thing I absolutely loved was that Twitch is so expressive! The facial expressions were all so delightful. ALSO. CLUB PENGUIN. AND WIZ101. And of course Webkinz, Animal Jam, and Neopets are in the background as well hahah, love that too!

This minigame was SO AMAZING omg I am OBSESSED with these character costumes and the fight animation too. Love all the cameos but this Strife content was so awesome!!!! The buttons were a little non-responsive at times but I managed to beat Twitch first try heheh

This is a pretty awesome frame and I'd like to shoutout AJ who I'm pretty sure drew it but I don't have the time or computer charge to reopen the game credits to check. If I'm wrong lemmie know but AJ deserves a shotuout anyway

I love how the subs are sub-sandwiches and I love the design of the camera and chat

I love how complex Twitch's route was. It was very compelling and definitely something I think most streamers need to hear. Swell job Team Timesync! Swell job indeed

I could shout about filmscore and the ghostie crew but instead I'm gonna scream about the google floor lmbo look at it I love it

Oh this. This is beautiful. I read the bonus room content and it's so neat that the timelines lined up coincidentally

Love the dramatic over-the-topness of this fake apology. He's so fake I love it. The voice my friend gave him was kinda like if a greaser was born in Alabama but raised in New York if that makes any sense

I STARTED SCREAMING AT THIS HAHAHAH! YOUTUBE KIDSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

Peak good end, now I know how to tie a tie. I actually really liked YouTube's route as it was cleverly designed and I love all the many different endings. It was kinda like wading through YouTube's recommended section where you'd save each different possibility of choices in your Watch Later and visit them all when you have the time (which is usually never). So many options but what to pick? I picked them all!

So when I got to this point I started laughing because my friend does all the voices and I only play User and Miss Blog Runner so she was carrying this entire section of the playthrough... AND THEN-

AND THEN THERE WERE FOUR! SHE HAD TO VOICE ALL FOUR OF THEM HAHAH! AND SHE DID AMAZINGLY! I kinda wish she wasn't anonymous cause I wanna give her a shoutout, but maybe when all the routes are released I can convince her to voice them all in a fandub (well not them ALL but definitely Kik and YouTube)

SWEET SWEET REVENGE HAHAHAHAH!!!! Totally deserved as long as they're done here hahahah. I do hope they can all tolerate each other again tho but I love this ending

This volume was long but a lot of fun! I love the Strife minigame and kinda hope it comes back in the future with more mechanics. Maybe an entire spinoff game like Smash Bros idk. Everything was so well written and I love how complex the characters are

Another fantastic entry for a fantastic game! Remember to recommend this game to various streamers to give it the attention it deserves (but not too many, don't wanna overwhelm our fav indie creators!)

[dare-to-dm]

Hello! I saw your post about Assassin's Creed and wanted to ask more. I was a fan of the series too in its early days for the exact reasons you describe: the meta story, lore, and cultural touches that tended to feel so very real. I fell out after ACIII and after the series emerged from the Unity debacle was told that they'd abandoned (or at least back-seated) those elements.

To hear they've survived in some form is encouraging, but what are your thoughts on the meta story since then? Is it worth giving the series a shot or like you said just an endless trail of breadcrumbs?

So, I think the series started going downhill in AC Origins when they introduced leveling and other RPG mechanics. To me, that was the turning point when the games shifted away from the classic formula in order to chase broader appeal and more aggressive monetization strategies.

Despite this downshift, for me every single title that I've played has had at least some redeeming features that made it worth it.

If you haven't played it, AC IV is actually one of my favorite of the series. That one is well worth a playthrough and I can recommend it without reservation. Fun gameplay, interesting story in both the past and future narratives, and stunning setting.

AC Rogue is also an underrated title that does a lot of interesting things with its story and better fleshes out the dark side of the Assassins and why someone might choose the Templars over them. And if you like the gameplay of IV, it's all the same here (though the setting is mostly frozen northern seas instead of the glorious Caribbean).

AC Syndicate is not as good in general, but does implement some nice features. It's the first (major) title with a playable woman protagonist, and the free running gets a refreshed feeling from updates to the setting. Like, they introduced major traffic in this one (moving trains, carriages and boats on the Thames) and once you get used to it it adds an interesting element to navigating around the setting. Plus your homebase is a train, and I think that's really nifty! And the DLC is pretty good. No really huge plot revelations, but the modern day assassins get better characterized.

AC Origins is another downshift (like I said, they introduce levelling and RPG elements here). I like the main character(s), but honestly, if you're looking for one to skip, I'd probably skip this one. The gameplay is meh and the story doesn't introduce much that is interesting. It's supposed to be about how the Assassins started as an organization, but there aren't really any stunning revelations here. It's more of a personal tale of one man seeking justice for his child. Also, the new modern day protagonist, Layla Hassan, is not very likeable IMO.

AC Odyssey is very similar to Origins, and it's just such a bloated game. It's soooo big. And more action focused. BUT it does introduce a major interesting plot element that I won't spoil here and you also learn a lot more about the Isu. Layla gets even less likeable.

And you've read my review of Valhalla. Layla is still the modern day protagonist, but she's at least getting a little more relatable. I haven't finished it yet, so I can't give my complete impressions. I'm certainly hopeful that I'll learn more about modern day factions within the Templar order and maybe some more about the origins of humanity itself, but that remains to be seen.

[shigayokagayama]

maybe a weird question, but do you have any recommendations for non-mob psycho media? I’ve been in search of something that hits similarly/is as well made and I trust your judgement o wise one. I’m not super picky, so recs of any kind would be appreciated :)

im like the worst person to take media recommendations from because you have to tie me down to watch something new and then i get obsessed with it forever, in terms of things ive seen recently that hit the same tumblr is NOT lying dungeon meshi is really good and if you start watching now you're gonna be watching at the part where it starts getting crazy

other stuff ive been into (gets progressively less mob psycho and generally more depressing like the further down we go bc i tend to get into really, really sad shit):

-i <3 deltarune but everyone has already played that. deltarune good. if you havent played deltarune play deltarune. genuinely like it more than undertale. also if the last chapter of deltarune is just the confession arc i called it and deserve a million dollars

-same w spiderverse. listen usually i dont care about superhero stuff but god these movies are good and i really hope they stick the landing.

-everything everywhere all at once continues to be one of my favorite movies ever

-rainworld (video game, very difficult but skurry's playthroughs do a good job summarizing the plot and general vibe of each route if you wanna watch those. i watched my friend play survivor ages ago and ive been playing through survivor with a friend on multiplayer and decided to watch some playthroughs to get a feel for the map and GOD DAMN the story of this game. rivulet route almost made me cry.) fair warning this is animal death the video game.

-severance (live action tv show, general plot is some sort of dystopian future where they invent a surgery where you can seperate your work self from your normal self so you clock into work and then black out until your shift is over. except your work self is just stuck at work forever. only 9 episodes but very, VERY good)

-i actually really enjoyed the scott pilgrim comics and the anime i wish anyone ever could be normal about them. id definitely suggest comics (if you can handle the 2000s humor) then anime. also basically everyone knows this but fair warning that starting out the main character is in his early 20s dating a 17 year old, it is explicitly treated as a shitty thing by the narrative and theres nothing explicit and its made very clear that he has 0 feelings for her whatsoever and is just using her as an ego boost but if youre sensitive to that stuff i might skip this one

-lots of webcomics about animals. i read so many webcomics about animals its like. my main media intake. this is part of the reason that i dont understand complaints about the art style my favorite webcomic looks like this

its called doe of deadwood and ill think about it until the day i die. others im currently reading (since this one wrapped a while ago) are "what lurks beneath" (cat cult on an island) "waves always crash" (cat cult on the beach) "i didnt know" (cat cult in a barn), toufati sawa (hyena trying to avenge her clan) and africa (leopard trying to survive the harshening world with her cubs) warning for animal death with all of these and general abuse warning for all those cat cult ones bc. cults.

-i like warrior cats. do not read warrior cats. its not very good and youll get stuck here forever.

-pathologic but the actual game and not just people describing the game please watch someone play the actual game summaries skip so much of the meat of the story and the characters. or play the game if you can bear learning to strategically quicksave. fair warning there is a lot of racism depicted against indigenous people in these games and while the framing of it generally aires on the side of "racism bad" there are a lot of kinda shitty tropes that come with it.

-listen bojack horseman is one of my shows it is the polar opposite of mob psycho in like every way and i would never in a million years recommend it if you want something that hits like mob psycho but if we're asking for just things i enjoy this is one of them. heavy cw for drug usage and abuse with this one. might want to give "does the dog die" a look for this one bc people are not joking about how heavy this show is

-same with hospice. hospice is a concept album about a hospice worker and a patient and has had more of an influence on me than any other piece of media ever bc i found it at the exact perfect time in my life for it to be relevant to my circumstances and now its like part of my identity. heavy cw for abuse also

-speaking of concept albums hey have you listened to tyler the creator he has several. WOLF especially i really like because the plot is actually like. kinda intricate. he also says the f slur a lot in WOLF but hes bisexual so diversity win?

-succession good. tw for like. everything though. probably "does the dog die" this one.

-hey have you ever watched david lynch's 1972 film "eraserhead"

[loregoddess]

for the alphabet ask meme, maybe K (What character has your favorite development arc/the best development arc?)

oh hmmmm, this is a hard one see, bc I like a lot of characters and a lot of stories so it really depends on which story we're talking about,, but speaking generally of things I can think of off the top of my head...hmm...

Favorite's a bit hard bc it depends on the story, and there hasn't been a specific character arc that's like, haunted me. I'd probably be predictable and say Midna, from LoZ, because I remember the first time I played the game a million years ago that I genuinely did not like her to start, but as the story went on and her character developed/changed I grew to love her, and then the ending of TP hits and it's like. Damn. But also it makes sense, it really puts into perspective the fact that she is a ruler, that she is willing and capable of making difficult decisions and do whatever she must to protect her people, and that makes the ending I dunno, bittersweet? Like I genuinely don't think that story could have ended any other way, it makes perfect sense for Midna as a character, and it makes sense for the themes of the story and I loved it, despite the poetic sadness of it.

As for best development arc, that's harder bc what is or isn't good writing depends on the audience really. I guess (and I'm pulling from some pretty old memories here), Reki's arc from the anime Haibane Renmei was deeply hopeful (there is always a path to peace, no matter how dark the past), although I will note Haibane Renmei's a pretty somber story for most (I found it incredibly hopeful, but the friend who had recommended to me thought it was incredibly sad). Likewise, despite being a tragedy in the purest sense, all the character arcs in The Tale of the Princess Kaguya were expertly written in ways I'd probably need a full analysis paper to figure out. Shoutout as well to Dungeon Meshi for having some of the most excellently written character arcs I've ever seen.

On an aside on the favorites and well-written character arcs though, I absolutely adore Castti's arc from Octo2. I actually figured out the plot twist of her story in her prologue chapter, and just spent the next few chapters in denial until I hit her Ch3. Upon my second playthrough I really paid attention, and her story arc is incredibly well-woven and probably my favorite in terms of like, sheer writing, and the Reveal adds or rather expands an interesting sense of duty to Castti's characterization. In terms of like, shifts in characterization, I really loved Osvald's arc bc I am a sucker for the power of love, and it was an interesting way to subvert my expectations for a vengeance plot.

[dreamywolfdd]

Sonic Thoughts

this will be different than most of my posts, but id like to type this out since i been thinking bout it alot, nothing wrong is going on btw this is mostly me typing out my thoughts

________

but if you want a tl;dr:

not entirely leaving/done with it, but i want to focus on other stuff aside of sonic the hedgehog in general, i want to focus on my other interests and obsessions

________

i been thinking bout it and i decided that sonic superstars will be my last sonic game i'll buy for who knows how long

this does not mean i hate sonic now or i'm done w it or anything, but i been recently thinking bout how sonic's been these past few yrs, content wise and what i personally think bout it currently

latest releases such as sonic prime, sonic movie 2, idw comics and sonic origins made me think bout it alot, as much as i enjoyed the movie and liked the idw comic i got as a gift, this is a whole new generation of fans we speaking of now, its been more noticeable how a new era of sonic is here thanks to the movies and that makes me so happy but it also makes me realize how some of the recent stuff flat out isn't rlly my thing (like sonic prime), sure, they may be good on their own and such but there's some stuff i just dont think its worth for me to look at, but i do however hope the newer generation enjoys it alot, i dont feel like part of that target demographic anymore

one major thing that made me question it too is pmuch with the quality of games, i recently gave frontiers a second playthrough and it made me remember why i had a fun experience with it, but it also made me see the flaws it has aswell too, its not a perfect game by any means but you can tell morio kishimoto, lizuka and everyone at sonic team have been wanting to deliver an amazing experience for a while now, remembering how the director had to convince higher ups to get more time for development made me think alot, this will be a dumb comparison maybe but if there's one thing i would love for sega to have its give more time and budget for its developers and such, recently, even if sometimes nintendo has been very questionable and sometimes bad, i will give them alot of credit and respect by how they been treating their artists and devs recently, games such as tears of the kingdom and smb wonder, seeing how they gave alot of time to their developers and artists to craft such wonderful games, i definitely want that for sonic games to have as well too, it has been admitted before and it has been a thing i been agreeing for yrs too

whenever i look back at sonic fondly, its mostly games i played in the past and still replay and hope i will for many yrs to come, same with the era and type of sonic i usually enjoy the most too, its just something thats not there anymore and its usually what comes up in my head whenever i think of sonic rather than the recent stuff, not saying its bad or anything but its my prefered one just like how many ppl have their prefered and definitive version of sonic

i been playing and enjoying many other stuff aside of sonic for many yrs now, as a kid i remember always being sattisfied with a game from the famicom for example, or how games like cave story and super meat boy made me have a blast for hours, but i do noticed how in recent years its been lowering with sonic and what i mostly do is revisit the older games and played frontiers when it came out, for yrs i been enjoying exploring and enjoying many different types of games old and new, i highly recommend sonic fans to also widen their library of games (and media in general) to explore many hidden gems

i have many other interests and obsessions that cannot leave my head, so i want to give more love to those as well too, at a far distance, ppl will know right away im a sonic fan, but will completely ignore my other interests and outside of gaming as well too, so its also why i been thinking bout this too

so yeah, if you notice my lack of sonic stuff is because of that, again, i do not hate sonic or im done with it, but its been a question in my head i been contemplating for some time now since sonic pretty much is one of the main things i literally cannot live without (xd), i will still do sonic fanart stuff from time to time, i will still replay my favorite games and such and of course, i will play and enjoy sonic superstars as my last sonic game for who knows how long, i hope ppl who have known and met me because of my sonic stuff have that in mind maybe

if you've read all of my wall of text, ty, i dont think this will be read either way but if so, ty very much and hope you have a good one

[snivel1]

hi snivel! im a little bored, can you infodump something, anything, about something you like? i wanna learn more about random things

Oouugghh really sorry to disappoint, but I don't have anything coherent up here in that brain of mine at the moment... nothing holds in here in any significant way..😭😭😭

But if you wanna, you can check out these interesting videos I really like and recommend, you'll pretty much get what's brewing inside my head a lot of the time :'))

And if you're interested in VNs I recommend watching Amelie Doree, she does really great analysis on themes in various VNs, even tho I haven't played practically any of the VNs she talks about it's still interesting!! :33

And also I've been thinking a lot about this social experiment since it's been shown to us at history of art.. much to think about

https://youtu.be/xTBkbseXfOQ?si=F254Ubm4nx3F8Z8d

And also if you don't know Mili, I absolutely recommend giving them a listen!! Their songs and stories were a significant inspiration in a bunch of my OCs and their stories and my perception of things!!! I can't recommend them enough!!💘‼️

https://youtu.be/x6q41EnhPnU

AAAND I've gotten into KinitoPET lately and I CAN'T- I definitely recommend checking it out!! I'm absolutely not normal about this game <33

It's a psychological horror game though, with disturbing things in it, and really not good for photosensitive people, so beware if you wanna check it out🙏 I recommend watching this extensive video, it's got a playthrough and more!!

Other than that I've been working on a project called Requiem of a Burrerfly(not sure about this title yet xpxjdps) that I'd like and hope to turn into a VN in the future, but cause of my art block I'm a bit stuck atm😔✊️ hoping it'll pass soon, but maybe I'll make a post with concept art and such about it soon ;33

[laynavile]

I'm hoping to compile a completely fresh load order on my series s - and I know it's never going to be as good/run as good as series x or PC or whatever, it's all I've got to work with atm. I have a decently stable load order currently and it's nice but I feel like it could be so much better. I know I definitely want the game to look nice, run nice and look "new". I know I definitely want as much character customization as possible without it being "too heavy" and taking up too much space - I'm used to playing on PC, although it's been at least a couple years in all honesty, and having racemenu and all of the fun stuff that comes with it - I also am really in the mood lately to play as an Argonian or Khajiit, but my favorite race to play as is Dunmer so mods that enhance any of them would be appreciated. I also really enjoy having a mod/mods that make the NPCs look better, in the past I've definitely used Bijin mods but I'm willing to give something else a try for a new" look. I definitely enjoy having expanded armors and weapons and retextures like aMidianBorn and whatnot so I'd like to definitely have something that covers those as well, I also enjoy alternative armor options. I enjoy having follower mods, currently using Inigo and I love him but I'm open to trying out others. I definitely want a perk overhaul, I've been using ordinator and while it's nice there's definitely things about it that I don't quite like so I'm open to trying something new, I'm just not sure what. It's been a long time since I've played with combat mods but I last tried wildcat and it was decent for sure but I'm not sure it's something I want to add in again, or any combat altering mods at all unless they're just /that good/ that I have to have it. I'm all for adding mods that are "dlc" like, eg. Wyrmstooth, but I don't want to "overload" my load order with those types of mods so only "the best of the best" are what I would want to add. I've considered doing a load order based around Legacy of the Dragonborn - watching and rewatching Gopher's playthrough of Leonard and Inigo using it has definitely inspired that - but I feel like basing a load order around a single mod seems "silly" in that I know there would likely be a lot of incompatibilities with other things I would want to use. But maybe someday I'll give it a go, or maybe someone can show me a load order using LotD that has everything or mostly everything I'm hoping for. Any help/recommendations are greatly appreciated. I just really want to get back to playing a game I love that I haven't played much in a long time. I also am really trying to get back to and start a new playthrough in Oblivion, I have thousands of hours invested in that game - definitely my favorite of the series - back on the Xbox360, but Skyrim's "updates" have somewhat "ruined" the replayability for me, but I'm definitely trying. Anyways, I'm rambling, thanks for reading and hopefully helping me out a bit. I should also mention that I have the Anniversary Edition.

[limpfisted]

wyll and romance! (spoilers for: wylls romance! its VERY cute. i recommend spoiling urself for it tho unless u plan a whole wyll specific playthru bc there r. very few scenes lol. like less than 30 minutes total.)

so i did not get this on my playthrough bc i felt weird to try to “persuade” wyll to kiss astarion on that save, but the fact that if u do, the next day he has a specific exclusive dialogue where this grown ass man says “my cheeks feel warm. am i blushing? i must be blushing.” with like the giddiness of the debutante ballerina he is, tells me that.

wyll loves when other people make the moves on him n are the “initiator.” he also doesn’t disapprove when ur slightly mean/overtly rude or call him a devil in his romance scenes, which means that, he has a good sense of humor, he likes em mean, or soft, as long as they’re giving him attention n he gets to see them smile and feel joy around him.

i feel that wyll has spent the great majority of his life alone exploring the world. some days mizora was his sole company, n only then thru his seeing eye, n thats not company he cares to keep despite his great yearning for the power she gives him. his experience romancing mostly comes from his teenage years—and while he has stoked his fires at a tavern or two or with a grateful survivor of misfortune, there’s a lot of time spent alone, thinking, playing pretend in his head, fantasizing. not always about romance, mind u—he’s not THAT much of a schoolgirl, n there were powers to master and training to be done even on his own. but under the stars—sometimes he dreamed of the ballrooms, even tho he danced alone.

i think he imagined a great love like the player character would come along. i imagine a part of him wished to be saved, and loved, despite or because of mizora. he’s not used to tender care, used to playing the charming hero, never being protected himself

when he is expressly sought after he gets embarrassed and extra romantic. he swoons when seduced. he can dish it out—see: his banter with SH and lae—but he can barely take “being taken care of”—especially when it’s so genuine, and he’s hurting so deeply, n his passions are stoked by a devil’s cinders…. n by a disgust with himself that only feels fixed, really, when they let him know his body and presence still make them feel “safe.” that he’s not an abomination or a monster—they’re still interested, they still care, he’s worth loving, or maybe, in wyll’s eyes, still turning their gaze upon, a summer setting sun.

he appreciates you so, so much. but also it’s a sistraction from the way his body n mind have changed. one he welcomes. one he craves, but can look upon with wonder instead of guilt. u save him from himself and his wallowing. u let him be a simple, ordinary fairy tale, even tho a devil cannot be a prince. that’s all he wants. maybe some u know, forbidden tomes n noble delights n excess as well, but mostly just a fairy tale. he promises!!!

in addition, and this is random, but i think wyll would be so good to be in a relationship with if u have mental illness. he doesn’t understand some things—like gale’s sacrifice—but he is so kind to dark urge. he knows you are not your intrusive thoughts, u just need help, and u can fight or overcome any feelings or thoughts that would harm u, n he thinks ur so brave for it, n he trusts u completely, like he hopes u trust him. hes no stranger to depression n self loathing n a lust for darkness after all, wyll sold his soul for the stuff, even if it was for all the right reasons tho i maintain the details r sketchy as hell.

if this all seems overly poetic its bc im practicing wyll’s voice here, a mini sample of what shipping would be like, LOL.

and this is with only two romantic scenes. then sixty hours later he proposes marriage with a magic acorn so full of love u can feel its magic warmth beneath the shell. i would love to see romances with player characters (companions included if they are “the player character) where we flesh that shit out! lmao

[autisticempathydaemon]

I'm obsessed with this song called Hello Euphoria by Turnover. I 10/10 recommend it!

I love super long videos when they're about literature and books, I could listen to those all fucking day! Also, ones of video game playthroughs and analysis hehe

My go to way to fall asleep is the classic way of finding a good ass sleep aid and zonking out to that. I tend to prefer if they're the kind that have an extended period of time that is either silence or like light breathing so that I can relax to it lol.

My all time favorite audio has got to be David's storm comfort audio, cause I hardly ever make it to the end of that audio before passing out lmao

I can recite the entirety of "10 Things I Hate About You" from start to finish <3

I would love love love to be besties with Huxley. He'd help me meet all my fitness goals and I love him for that

Go-to gas station combo is a bag of Dill Pickle sunflower seeds and a bottle of Dr. Pepper to spit them into once I drink it all :) (that's thank to all my years playing softball lol)

My favorite playlist right now is actually an EDM playlist that a friend sent me the other week! It's been great for productivity haha

Can't wait to see the results of this!

I don’t have a big, overarching, destined by fate reason for my pick, and yet there was no contest in my head. I can’t think of a cuter match for you than Hudson.

There’s so many little things that work here that I love. Hudson is almost definitely an EDM, raver boy, so he would have all the amazing playlists to share with you. He also strikes me as an active dude, someone that’s not unfamiliar with fitness. (Maybe he goes before and after radio shifts to take advantage of those 24 hour gyms?) Also, because he presumably has good taste in movies, he also loves the 90’s Heath Ledger classic romcom (and Heath Ledger in general. Like I said, Hudson has good taste.)

In general, he’d be a really cute, supportive, fun boyfriend to have. Hudson would show up to any and all softball games he can, threatening to serenade you from the seats/bleachers like a cheeseball. If he can’t be there, he’s regaling his listeners with play by play updates between songs, because goddamn, Hudson would be the best hype man.

Song:

I confess, I messed up/ Dropping "I'm sorry" like you're still around/ And I know you're dressed up/ Hey kid you'll never live this down/ You're just the girl all the boys want to dance with/ And I'm just the boy who's had too many chances

Not every but almost all of the Redacted Bois are Fall Out Boy girlies in my head, and Hudson is no exception. I love the 80’s, 90 teen movie vibes of this song, and I think he would too. He strikes me as the type to galavant around your shared apartment, belting this out to you like y’all are in a music video.

Runner-Ups:

I like Damien for you because he’s also a productive babe with fitness goals- we all love a hot gym couple! Vincent, I like as a runner up for a couple of silly reasons. One, he’s of the perfect age and generation to appreciate 10 Things I Hate About You and related movies. Two, I’m imagining him and his family playing softball like the vampires in Twilight play baseball, and I can’t stop laughing.

note: I hope comparing softball to baseball isn’t a huge faux pas I was never a sporty gay (affectionate)

Read this post and send me an ask if you’d like a match-up of your own! 💌

[aotopmha]

I'm having a blast with FFXIV about a week in.

So, FFXIV spoilers.

The advantage of having watched many playthroughs of the game because I fell in love with the story so much is that I get to skip anything I think that dragged on for too long.

I'm at lvl 34-35 MSQ, just defeated Titan and even with the skipping I really felt the drag of the Company of Heroes quests.

(The fight was good, but was way too little payoff for what you have to go through to get there.)

The big positive people always list with A Realm Reborn is that it lays the foundation for what comes after, but the Titan quest didn't even do that.

The Company of Heroes is a footnote that I think is barely given minor mentions after A Realm Reborn.

In comparison, the very first Ascian we see mentions creation magics, the Ala Mhigan fight for liberation is actually a really consistent plot thread throughout the entire story so far, even the Lambs of Dalamud at least get explored in a minor way down the line.

On the other hand, the plot thread that involves Gridania and the elementals kind of goes nowhere as well. Gridania is the most poorly handled of the three city states in my opinion, where Limsa and Ul'dah get some fantastic material to have them progress and grow past their racism.

It's unfortunate because I think aesthetically Gridania is the prettiest of the three. I've liked going through Gridania's environments the most - in that sense I don't regret starting with Lancer.

And of course, there is everything with the empire and that setup.

Laurentius, Riol and several characters at Little Ala Mhigo all become of some importance for the finale of the expansion and perhaps beyond.

Finally, while I get to skip what I don't care for, I also get to look at stuff playthroughs might skip out on, like the smalltalk between characters between quests.

I really like seeing Arenvald this early on, for example.

So yeah, even if it's not perfect, ARR absolutely lays some important foundations for what comes after.

All that aside, somehow, I don't know how, just hitting your main three damage buttons is incredibly satisfying for me.

Maybe it's that the better fights also have you dodge stuff, but I enjoy my three stabby buttons on Lancer.

Wish I had an AoE of some sort, but I do not expect any kind of satisfactory combat gameplay loop from MMOs to begin with.

My biggest experience with MMOs has been Runescape and I know that game has its own high skill ceiling, but it never did anything for me in its most base form when it comes to the actual combat gameplay.

I do not associate MMOs in general with good "gameplay" so to say, just as "second monitor" gaming, something to do while listening to a podcast or something you occasionally log in to see a number go up while running around aimlessly in a virtual sandbox.

And I think you can do that with XIV, too, but XIV very much feels like a "game", game to me.

You can technically spam your one button to get through everything, but engaging with the systems is much more fun (and quicker).

Aside from MSQ, I've dabbled in the Gold Saucer content, which is a collection of minigames and while I'm better at some vs others (Air Force One vs the Leap of Faith type of challenges or Fall Guys), they're a blast, too.

You absolutely can see the scuff in here at all points, but it's fun enough where it doesn't drag the game down for me.

I can't wait for the Heavensward stuff and getting Dark Knight unlocked.

(I really hope I like tanking because I'm unlocking it due to my love for the job story of the class. Tanking is supposedly fairly easy, at least, but I want it for the fancy armor and fantastic lore above all. Lancer/Dragoon is my fave out of the ARR starting classes because it just looks cool, too.)

All of my encounters with other players have been mostly neutral to positive, but I haven't gone out of my way to talk beyond thanking for dungeons and the like.

Conclusion: game fun, I recommend.

Btw, did you know that the critically acclaimed MMORPG Final Fantasy XIV has a free trial that includes the entirety of A Realm Reborn AND the award-winning Heavensward and Stormblood expansions up to level 70 with no restrictions on playtime?

[tinygameroom]

Interactive Fiction to Look Out For On Itch.io

itch.io is a trove of interactive fiction games, visual novels, and kinetic novels of all types, and I’ve run into a good handful that I think are worth highlighting (and playing again myself!)

Many of these I haven’t finished yet due to the sheer amount of content or because I went for the ending I wanted straight away, but I’d love to finish them thoroughly and perhaps review some of them in the future. 

A couple notes! First, it’s been a while since I’ve played some of these games, and some of them I haven’t seen all of the paths. I try to give warnings where needed, but my warnings might not be complete as I don’t know absolutely everything in each game. Please check the games’ pages and look after yourself!

Secondly, many of these are available free, and some are for sale at a low minimum price, but I encourage you to supporter the writers, artists, composers and developers in any way you can, whether that’s giving them a follow, donating, or just leaving a nice comment. Supporting indie creators is a huge part of what this blog is about so give back to those who create things you love! Now let’s get into the list!

Visual Novels:

Hikeback is a horror visual novel about hitchhiking, time loops, and murder. It gives a lot of incentive to keep playing and replaying, as the story advances almost every time you start again, with new choices and details being revealed as it all unravels. This game is incredibly engaging and beautifully written, and lives up to the promise of time loops and meta game mechanics. I recommend this for anyone who wants a good spooky, existential story. Be warned of loud noises, jumpscares, glitch effects, blood and violence, abuse, and themes of self harm, suicide, and depression. The itch.io pge has a list of content warnings as well as a full spoilery breakdown of warnings if you need them. You can find Hikeback on itch.io here!

Nothing to Say is a Visual Novel dating sim where you go on a date with Zoe, a girl you really like. The only problem is you’re very, very nervous. In this smart little game, you’ll be limited in how many letters you can use to express yourself, and you’ll have to unlock further dialogue options by getting to know Zoe, being honest with her, and being cute together. You’ll only earn letters from dialogue options once, encouraging you to explore more dialogue each playthrough until you get all the options to fully tell Zoe how you feel. Nothing to Say is playable here on itch.io!

Text-Interactive:

The Three-Body Problem is a queer romance interactive fiction about celestial witches living in a dark, magical wood when they encounter a young stranger. It features a nonbinary character, a potential polyamorous relationship, and healthy dom/sub dynamics. I found this story sweet and charming, with likable characters and pretty, easy to follow story writing. The Three-Body Problem deals with themes of abuse in a compassionate manner, and is in large part about healing and finding people with whom you are safe. I recommend it for anyone wanting a nice queer romance read with fantasy elements. Watch out for themes of abuse and sexual themes. You can purchase The Three-Body Problem on itch.io here for $5 or play a free mobile version from Wattpad!

Raik is a deeply Scottish fantasy melded with reality. You play as a young woman dealing with anxiety and stress trying to make it through her day, while a fantasy world unravels around her. This story has layers, and all of it is beautiful. The portrayal of anxiety is poignant and real, and the writing is gorgeous. I don’t want to say anything else to spoil it, but this game is fantastic. I recommend for anyone who likes to daydream. Please be warned of themes of anxiety, stress, and panic attacks as well as some fantasy violence. You can buy Raik here on itch.io for 3 GDP (or more! Please support the author!)

Space Frog! (I saw a lunar eclipse) is a story of a frog in space. He’s a frog and he’s in space! This is a cute, short interactive fiction with low stakes, no worries, just cute adventures of a frog in space. You can direct frog as he travels and learn more about him. It has adorable illustrations and clickable text that reveals extra flavor information. I recommend to anybody looking for a smile. You can play Space Frog here on itch.io and also download a zine of the game for $2 or more!

Floor is a text-interactive game about lying on the floor. You can lie on the floor, and you can get off the floor. What you do next is up to you! This is a short game with no real stakes, just real life boredom and activities. It may evoke feelings of loneliness or disappointment, but you can also just have some hummus. Floor can be played here on itch.io!

Apple Spice Pancakes is another short game about making pancakes with your sweetie! It’s entirely wholesome and adorable. The game text is all dialogue - the dialogue you read is from your partner, and your choices are your real-time responses to them. You can help them design your perfect breakfast while being disgustingly cute. Apple Spice Pancakes is available here on itch.io!

A Witch’s Word is a romantic text game where you have made a deal with a witch, offering her your firstborn. The only problem is you don’t have a child. Or a partner. The witch is here to help. Explore three potential relationships as your witch continues to introduce you to new sweethearts, trying to find someone who you are willing to love and who is willing to give up your child. And if you don’t want any of these people the witch offers you... maybe play the game anyway. See what can happen. A Witch’s Word is available here on itch.io!

Other:

Novena is an interactive poem! It’s a pixel art game that you navigate around, interacting with parts of the environment to read through the poem, which is about the ocean, and wishes, and expectations. And compassion. It has absolutely stunning visuals and music, and the poem makes me cry each time. Be warned of some really heavy feelings, but it will do its best to comfort you. The poem takes about five minutes to read and is here on itch.io waiting for you.

I hope a few of these games are of interest to you and that I’ve inspired you to support these great indie developers! If you wanna support me and see more articles and reviews on indie games, or encourage me as I learn to make my own, you can follow me here and on itch.io and support me with donations on ko-fi! Please reblog if you like this article, since tumblr will make it very hard to find with all these links. Have a great day and play some good games!

[brotherdusk]

You inspired me to check out Pathologic, no clue what this game has in store for me tho :] thanks!

oh good god anon, my initial reaction to this ask was terror 😭

don't get me wrong, I'm so excited to hear I got someone interested in these games, because there's so much about them that's amazing and deserves to be widely appreciated! but I'd be doing my love for it a disservice if I didn't warn you there's a large chance that you won't actually enjoy playing it and will quit without finishing (especially if you go in completely blind)... and that's totally ok! you wouldn't be alone!

pathologic 1 is hard! it's purposefully obtuse and janky and cruel. pathologic 2 is much more polished, but I still stopped playing halfway through because it got too stressful (admittedly I was working an intense job at the time, so maybe I could pick it up again now and have more success). the point is, for a lot of people, actually playing the games themselves isn't always the best way to consume pathologic - and it's okay if it's not for you! you can and should enjoy it in other ways! (I'm still really glad I did play as much of 2 as I did, though - some aspects of the gameplay and atmosphere have to be experienced firsthand to be truly appreciated.) (EDIT: can’t believe I forgot to say this but the marble nest DLC for pathologic 2 is perfect, self-contained, can be played without touching the main game, and is much easier. huge recommend if you’ve got the cash to spare)

I also can't recommend SulMatul's longform playthroughs enough if you want to experience the entire game without having to suffer through it yourself - she runs every route, voice acts the NPCs (the irish accent she gave to Bad Grief is permanently etched in my mind because it's perfect), she knows the lore inside and out, and her in-character roleplaying is fantastic. start with her bachelor playthrough if you’re interested, the audio is rough at times but so worth it

and even if you do enjoy playing the games yourself and don't need to take the easy way out like me, I still highly recommend watching hbomberguy's Pathologic is Genius, And Here's Why video essay at some point. it's a deep analysis of the plot, meta, and mechanics of the first game (no spoilers for the second game) and was responsible for kicking off my interest in the series in the first place.

that was a lot! again, I'm super flattered that my pathologic posting inspired you to check it out, and I hope you find your ideal way to consume all the amazing things it has to offer <3 please feel free to drop by again at any point and let me know how you're finding it!!

[strangerays]

Nothing in Particular Update #2

It’s the Nothing and Particular and Everything update part two: the electric booglaloo. This one is long, so strap in.

It’s been a while since I wrote an update for this story. To be honest, this one gave me a lot of stress, but here I am! Writing this story feels like it is going very slow. I keep telling myself I’ve made a lot of progress (which is true, I have) but for some reason it doesn’t feel like I have? This is likely just my own insecurity. To be frank, I can’t believe I’m still writing this story. If you had told me in February that I’d still be writing this when the weather got warm, I would have laughed.

I am SO excited that I will finally be able to focus on writing now that I’m out of school. I’m afraid to speak the rough deadline that I’ve given myself for this story (the end of August-early September) but now that I’ve spoken it into existence, I hope I can finish! (I hope I can stop watching dumb videogame playthroughs and listening to The Magnus Archives and get something done)

Here is a link to the story introduction and previous update!

TAGLIST (ask to be +/-); @wannabeauthorzofija @a-completely-normal-writer @baguettethebooklover​ @corkytheguar @writeherewaiting

STORY CHANGES/THOUGHTS/IDEAS: 

Here is a big one: I’ve been trying to write this story for myself. I started writing Ray’s story from a place that was personal to me, but I feel like, as that part of myself has begun to heal, I’ve started to think about what a reader would want out of the story. I’m realizing that this is my story so it has to be what I want. Drafts are drafts for a reason, so I’m going to try to get better at letting myself explore what is fun to me.

I always thought I was a discovery writer (I still sort of think I am) but as I’ve finished small sections of the story, I am finding that it’s very helpful to do a rough outline of scenes in upcoming chapters. (I also recommend turning to this if something doesn’t work and you need to retrace your steps!) Just helps me feel more organized!

Jude’s character has got to be one of the most difficult personalities I’ve ever written. Putting her beside Ray just makes it harder. Where Ray is secretive and keeps to herself, Jude is ready to unpack her entire life’s story to anyone. I find that I really have to slow down when writing their interactions. I know this is going to be nowhere near perfect in the first draft, but I think it is a main contributor to my slow writing.

I really like this little narrative I’ve created in the background of the main plot with Ray and Lonan. I love writing these scenes because it’s a way for me to use Lonan when he’s not actively with Ray and to show why Ray is predetermined about things at certain points. Also I love their friendship so much <3

CONGRATULATIONS TO ME on starting to read again because I forgot how much of a help reading other people’s stories can be when you’re struggling with your own oml

I now have a set timeline for the story! Takes place ~4-5 months.

I did that thing where you write a letter from the characters’ perspectives and that was kind of fun

Also just for fun I thought I’d add in that I spent an hour and a half last week filling up a page in my sketchbook with diagrams of the plot. It feels good to be a mad scientist

EXCERPTS UNDER THE CUT!

*At this point, I’m only sharing writing that I am really proud of in order not to spoil the story! This is because I am unsure whether I want to publish this story someday. With that said, that does NOT give you permission to steal my ideas!

CHAPTER: NIGHT CRIES

#1

In the last week of summer, I did everything I could to avoid post-vacation blues. I rode my bike along the gravel roads with no destination, wore my dark sunglasses to people-watch, and fed salami to the minnows that floated on the cusps of boulders. Usually, I sat still for so long that my elbows turned a deep shade of red and the blood in my toes buzzed.

New pockets seemed to open up in Point Blink every day. And with them, came new people. Most of them were older – a middle aged woman who caked her lipstick on, an uncle estranged from his brother, a couple who had miscarried. I hadn’t forgotten about the kids at Mothouse. It was impossible not to think about them. It wasn’t just that I’d never seen them before.

#2

The girl’s limp cigarette bled a trail of smoke that seeped into my Vans. My shirt folded like skin over my bed post. Haunted the room – foiled my mauve sheets and teased my locks. Swept the curtains apart and heated the oak floor. Beams of moonlight leapt to my bookcases; highlighted the posters from various podcasts and bands that I listened to. Wind whistled when I was too still. She forced me to look outside, onto the dark cul-de-sac lit by the reflections of forming rain puddles. No matter whether I sat at my desk or burrowed under my sheets, I felt out of place. She made my bedroom louder. She made my bedroom quieter.

I decided it would probably be best if I never saw her again.

To be honest, I don’t remember much about writing this chapter because it was over a month ago (sorry) but I’m still quite happy with the prose! This comes in after Ray sees Jude for the first time at Mothouse. Based on a first impression, decides that she might want be friends with Jude.

CHAPTER: SORRY

#1 

If you spend any long amount of time with someone, you’ll become a thief to their behaviors. If I stared long enough, trees began to replace all of the people we’d ever seen. Oaks had roots that serpentined the ground like children splashing in the bay, pines with needles like spindly old hands, maples with hollows like watchful eyes – all things Lonan had taught me to observe.

CHAPTER: GHOSTS

Then there was the sea – violent and knowing as it romped within bays and alcoves. She had eaten me many times before, both my father and Lonan too. Gulped them as if they were shining plastic wrappings left behind after a meal. I spited her for inviting me once again. I reached up again to grapple with the next rung. It twisted and offered a low whistle.

In these two chapters, Ray is on a photography trip with her class. This is the first time she’s been on this annual trip without Lonan. She left that morning with a goal of being independent and learning to get on with one of the only people she has felt close to. I realize now that the Ghost excerpt sort of sounds like her dad and Lonan have drowned?? Which was not my intention??

CHAPTER: A DIVINE INTERVENTION

#1

“Do you believe in ghosts?” A raspy voice teased from behind me. Cigarette smoke tickled the words, like they were stuck together with jelly inside of her. The question wasn’t particularly calming, but it strengthened my grip on reality. As if the foiled leaves, bark, and dandelions had sprung from the ground and begun to float, they came crashing back down.

I was made of stone.

“I’m not a ghost,” Jude said. “If I was, a ladder would be a pretty counteractive way to outrun me. I could just float up there and haunt you.”

“Maybe you’re a ghost,” she asked, her voice distant.

I shifted my grasp up and down the sides of the ladder. “What?”

“Don’t you believe in ghosts?”

I was reading back some of Ray and Jude’s conversation and there are so many snippets of dialogue that make me laugh because I totally forgot I wrote them... but UGhhH I don’t know if I want to share them because I don’t know whether or not I want to try and publish the story someday. Speaking of that, it’s sort of because it’s so personal to me? I don’t know (this is for future me to pursue) Honestly though, reading these back has made me really happy :)

#2

I wanted to shake her by the shoulders. She acted as though Point Blink could breathe – as though corpses in the cemetery might pull the grass away like dead skin, neighbors would draw blades, and blood-salt would stain her clothes rather than that from the sea. “Trust me, they’ll forgive you. But, I’m just saying, most people around here don’t care nearly as much as you think so. Most of them are way older anyways, so they’re tired of us.”

“Is that you complimenting yourself?” Jude asked.

“Not intentionally,” I said, “but I will take it.”

She laughed. “You shouldn’t be so nice to strangers.”

I wasn’t trying to be. I just didn’t think I wanted her to dislike me.

#3

“I don’t think it’s a bad thing or a good thing,” Jude said. “Being good gets you tucked into a thousand different memories. Being good makes you live a lifetime.”

I almost laughed, but then I wondered what I was to her now. “I don’t talk to lots of people.”

“Sometimes there aren’t many people to talk to. But I thought you would have loads of friends.”

I wasn’t sure what to say to that. “I thought you would too.”

Alarm like grief lit her eyes, but she laughed. I did too.

“You hardly know me,” she said quietly.

Then the girls explore some old newspapers and letters in a fire tower! Spooky fun!

CHAPTER: YOU LET THIS HAPPEN

This isn’t a major spoiler as it’s literally in the blurb I wrote, but Ray and Jude are caught (targeted..??)  in a fire. Ray is brought back to a field where she is questioned.

CHAPTER: NOTHING HAPPENS

He was quiet for several moments while he painted a picture with what little details I had given him, then said, “It’s unfair. I think that’s why it hurts.”

“Because we almost got hurt?”

“No. Because it came true.”

His gentle, ragged voice made me think I could tell him anything. Sometimes, I think that, even then, he knew I left something out.

Ray talks to Lonan after the fire... She’s being a bit dishonest about what actually happened.

CHAPTER: WHY NOT

I remember how the barest amount of red light glared across Lonan’s entire scalp and washed his boyish curls magenta from the roots out. When Jude leaned back on the counter, she melded into the darkness.

This chapter is just part of the narrative that I created with Ray and Lonan’s friendship. There isn’t much I want to spoil from it, but I liked this paragraph!

CHAPTER: INEVITABLE

“We didn’t do anything,” I said.        

“Someone did. Why won’t you believe me?”

 “I think I would remember whether or not someone was there with us,” I said, “even if we didn’t have the picture.”

This was untrue. I hung lots of photos in my room. A long time would pass before I went to a restaurant again, or a specific coven on one of the beaches, or an outfit that I wore, and I would look into one of my pictures and remember it, and then I would be quite angry with myself that I had almost forgotten that thing forever.

“I don’t think you understand what I mean,” Jude said. I didn’t like the way she’d lowered her voice. She sounded different every time I saw her. She reached out her arm so our photos were side by side and our fingers were almost touching. “I don’t think you want to.”

Ray finds herself alone in the school’s dark room with Jude. Based on the contents of one of her photos, she tries to convince Ray that there is more to the fire than what meets the eye.

CHAPTER: (this one is untitled)

I didn’t mind that he followed me everywhere. Even when he was quiet, I didn’t find it strange to be around him. We sat silently through films and went on walks. Once, he had fallen asleep while watching The Iron Giant in my bed. I didn’t know if I should wake him up once it ended. I tried not to stare at him. He’d rolled onto his side and bundled himself in one of my blankets covered in stars up to his shoulders so only his small face poked out like a baby owl’s. His soft breath messed his dirty gold coils. They were at their longest. Except for the ebbing light from a candle on my desk, my house was asleep – Lonan needed to go home.

For the first time, I wondered if anyone cared where he was.

Another small part of the little friendship narrative! (This really is the part of the story where I get nostalgic for my childhood, isn’t it) Ray starts to discover more about Lonan’s home life in this part of the story, but there’s not much that I think I want to reveal about that for now.

CHAPTER: THE CRUX OF IT

Why did I feel so paranoid? I found myself staring out the window, into the film of blue that the late sun shown onto the grass and trying to remember what summer felt like.

My main problem was that I didn’t know how to talk to Jude unless it was about Sugarfell. I ran from the hush of cigarette smoke behind closing doors and heard her loud voice in conversations. Even though there might have still been a part of me that wanted to be friends with her, I didn’t have much to base that feeling off of. I could have spent hours clicking the little pieces of her that I had together, but the crux of it was that I would never know Jude unless I forced myself to.

For some reason, that really scared me.

I spent all week trying to think of what to say to her. By Friday afternoon, I still had nothing.

I left off writing with Ray actively avoiding Jude’s little investigation into the arsonist. Ray doesn’t want to be involved in this because she feels that it will throw her sense of normalcy off course. She really just wants to learn how to adapt to a life without her best friend. (It doesn’t help that she’s got fresh trauma)

What will Ray decide? I don’t know. We shall see. (just kidding I know)

Sorry this update was longer! I think I would like to start updating more often than once a month just because they would be shorter and those of you reading this won’t forget what happened in the last update. There are thousands and thousands of words that didn’t show up in this update because - like I said - I don’t know whether I want to publish this story ever?? I’ll probably talk more about this in a separate update.

Thank you so much to those of you who read about my story! I hope you enjoy it!

:)

p.s. btw I now have a myWriteClub account! You can check it out here and stalk me as I tragically fail my writing goals!