#and aang just really wanted to believe there would be one (1) firebender worth being an avatar for. he was manifesting hard

[littlestkoi-n]

I could talk about Aang and Zuko all day. they're everything and more.

[narrativelysignificantturtleduck]

a playlist for piandao! annotations under the cut:

this is probably the playlist that needs the annotations the most, just because piandao's backstory is not in canon and while you might know it from following me it's not like, common knowledge, and i've had to fill in the gaps with headcanons. while all the playlists are chronological to some extent, this one and aang's are the most direct.

1. take me to war - the crane wives

all the fire i have swallowed / all the sparks that went dark in my gut / i am always burning up

young piandao is far from the calm, confident master we meet in canon - he was abandoned by his parents for being a nonbender and grew up in an orphanage, feeling unvalued and anxious and angry at a world that abandoned him. "all the sparks that went dark in my gut" - his inability to firebend.

and his ticket out of there, and an outlet for his rage? well. the war. he thinks if he can make it in the military, he can prove his worth, rise above his circumstances.

this decision will haunt him for the rest of his life.

2. phenom - thao & the get down stay down

first of the secondary class-class-class / you know i don't trust you, what's the catch-catch-catch / don't you fucking touch me i will gnash-gnash-gnash

along the same themes of ambition and anger, but when he's slightly older, having joined the military. he's determined to 'pull himself up by his bootstraps', and this makes him a terrifying force on the battlefield, makes him terrifyingly determined to be a master at whatever he sets his mind to.

3. king - florence and the machine

i need my golden crown of sorrow / my bloody sword to swing / i need my empty halls to echo with grand self-mythology

here, we foreshadow his future as the revered mysterious swordmaster ("grand self-mythology"), but the ambition and drive of this song are still young piandao, particularly the musings on the value of art (we'll get to that in the next song). this also serves as a nod to the trans piandao headcanon - he is underestimated not only for being a nonbender with no parents, but also for being perceived as a woman. his desire to prove himself as a warrior is also about proving his masculinity.

4. working for the knife - mitski

i always thought that the choice was mine / and i was right / i just chose wrong

piandao eventually regrets joining the military. there are lines in this song like "i wish i was making things too" and "i used to think i would tell stories", about having given up creative, artistic dreams in pursuit of "working for the knife", and that's very much piandao, the kid who was taught art to cope with his anxiety but who left it behind to join the military. he feels this real pain of lost time, and there's very literally a possibility of "dying for the knife".

5. live by the sword - dorian electra

you wanna hit like this? you're gonna hurt like this / you want to live like this? you're gonna die like this / live by the sword and you die by the sword

piandao realizes he needs to get out of the military. yeah, this is the title of the playlist, but honestly i wish there was a better lyric with sword in it to sum him up bc living by the sword in this context is not a good thing.

6. rootless - marina

running with my roots pulled up / caught me cold so they could cut / what there was left of love

he doesn't really know what to do with himself after he leaves the military. he cuts off a lot of his old connections, and he doesn't exactly have a home to go back to. he reflects on how the military preyed on his rootlessness, lack of "family tree", so to speak, made him believe that it was the answer and then made him do cruel, heartless things in its service. he travels the world for a while, not really knowing where he's meant to be.

7. home - ellie goulding

wash the dirt, a hard day's work / know my place / on my own / no poison in my bones / on my own / this is where i build my home

piandao works as he travels, ideally something in a blacksmith's shop but it varies. he's having to start over, work hard and pull himself up for the second time. but it's better than it was. his home is his own body, but it's better to be alone than be part of an organization like the military.

8. i am a rock - simon and garfunkel

i've built walls / a fortress deep and mighty / that none may penetrate

9. johnny - sarah jarosz

when he comes back to the fire nation, having saved a fair amount from his travels, he is fairly distant and secretive. he slowly builds up his teaching business, slowly grows wealthier, enough to buy the castle he lives in when we meet him in canon. but people don't know his past when they seek him out for training, they just know his reputation, and he doesn't share. he keeps everything he learned on his travels, his membership in the white lotus, his troubled childhood, all tight inside, and as we see in canon, he's pretty selective about who he lets in.

you might not get what you pay for / you know that nothing's for sure / and an open heart looks a lot like the wilderness

i've discussed this before bc it was my #2 most listened song of 2022 but i also want to add that the "open heart" line reflects this recurring theme of closing himself off, not admitting weakness, etc. it's unfamiliar, uncharted territory for him, but he gets more open later in life, after he and sokka adopt each other as father and son and he wants to be a good parent to him. them <3

[volkswagonblues]

a lil guide to the Fire Nation for the ATLA fic writers out there

(aka. a no means exhaustive primer on east asia by an asian person)

This is a guide for fic writers want to write a canon-era story set in the Fire Nation, or featuring Fire Nation characters. A quick little primer on the tiny details of everyday life that you might not think about, but certainly stuff that would make me, an asian person, wince if I were to encounter it. BRUSHES, not quills. CHOPSTICKS, not forks. 

(note #1: this was partly inspired by a chat with @elilim​) 

(note: #2:  I originally intended it for zukka fic writers before realizing that other writers might find it useful. so apologies for a slight Zuko-bias for that reason)

(note #3: this is all stuff i was thinking about when writing firebender’s guide, in case anyone was wondering)

1. CLOTHING

Okay, I think the most straightforward way to describe what everyone’s wearing most of the time is “tunic”. They’re all just...tunics of different colours and varieties. Later when Zuko’s the Fire Lord he wears robes. The show provides a better visual guide than I could, here are a few notes to keep in mind:

a) Japanese people wear their collars LEFT crossed over RIGHT

I don’t think this would come up in writing as much as it would in art, but it’s considered bad luck to do it the wrong way because that’s only for dead people. Let my boy Zuko demonstrate:

b) There are no buttons

This is picky, but Wikipedia says “Functional buttons with buttonholes for fastening or closing clothes appeared first in Germany in the 13th century.[6] They soon became widespread with the rise of snug-fitting garments in 13th- and 14th-century Europe.” I kinda believe it. If you look closely, characters’ clothes are always tied together or wrapped in some way with a belt. If there are fasteners, they’re braided frog closures that go into a little loop, like the qipao-style dresses women wear in Ba Sing Se, or Zuko’s casual prince’s clothes in the topmost image. Anyways, I don’t think Zuko or Azula or the Gaang would technically button or unbutton anything when they’re changing clothes. Clothing is designed to be tied, not buttoned.

[so much more under cut]

c) This isn’t a real rule, but there’s something called koromogae, or the seasonal changing of clothing in Japan.

This is something I learned when I was writing firebender’s guide, and I just liked the fun detail about there being a strict calendar for when to wear something. I liked the idea of someone like Zuko, who actually spent most of his formative years outside of the Fire Nation, coming home and just suffering mutely through the summer heat because upper class etiquette says no changing into cooler clothes until August 15. 

From My Asakusa: 

And this website:

Generally, people change from thick, heavy, dark-coloured clothes for winter to thin, lighter, bright-coloured clothes for spring and summer. In traditional Japanese culture, particularly in formal settings such as tea ceremony, it is important to acknowledge the changes of seasons—in such circumstances, not only the patterns and colours of the kimono that are worn but also the utensils and furniture that are used are required to change. By changing their clothing, people notice and appreciate the change of seasons. [Japan Foundation]

Here are some visual guides from the official creators for clothes: (notice how it’s pretty much always left over right)

2.FOOD AND EATING

a) Traditional cuisine

It seems like the most common foods in canon are Fire Flakes and meat, to the point where poor Aang had to eat lettuce out of the garbage at some point.

HOWEVER, the Fire Nation seems to basically a big subtropical archipelago, so I would guess that seafood and rice are common. If you want to write about characters eating, a. quick google for “traditional japanese cuisine” would help you come up with a menu really quickly.

Wikipedia says:

The traditional cuisine of Japan, washoku (和食), lit. "Japanese eating" (or kappō (ja:割烹)), is based on rice with miso soup and other dishes; there is an emphasis on seasonal ingredients. Side dishes often consist of fish, pickled vegetables, and vegetables cooked in broth. Seafood is common, often grilled, but also served raw as sashimi or in sushi.

But before we get too serious, at one point the Gaang eats a “smoked sea slug” (Sokka’s Master) 

Oh ATLA, never stop being you.

b) Utensils

One thing to keep in mind is chopstick etiquette. Someone like Zuko or Toph, for instance, would have completely internalized all of these.

Another thing is that there are no glasses. Cups and bowls are made of ceramic or clay. Let the Gaang show you:

And another note: characters won’t eat “bread” in the European sense, ie. a baked lump of dough. Steamed buns, yes. Fried pancakes made from batter, yes. Flatbreads, okay I’ll give it a pass. Rice or noodles should be the most common carbs of choice.

3.ETIQUETTE

“In the homeland, we bow to our elders” - angry schoolmistress in The Headband.

Japan Guide has a list of etiquette rules for visiting Japan, which is interesting but not too necessary to read. In general, based on what The Headband tells us, Fire Nation characters would have been raised with a strong nationalist curriculum that values communal contribution over individualist expression. Even someone like Zuko, who openly rebels against that, probably couldn’t help but be affected by it. In general the Fire Nation seems to have an East Asian-ish set of values. It’s patriarchal, all the positions of authority are filled by men; there seems to be a strong emphasis on patriotism; there’s a sense of diffidence and respect towards one’s elders; and finally, there’s an emphasis on “knowing” one’s place in society and fitting into what’s expected of oneself.

I don’t really know how to describe it, but in China and Japan I sometimes feel like there’s rules for everything, and even people born and raised there acknowledge it could be stifling at times. You could go down a rabbit hole researching points of etiquette (for instance, rules on who has to sit where in group dinners...), but to me the most important thing is acknowledging that Fire Nation has a rigid system of etiquette, and also, they’re an imperialist power who’s pretty prejudiced against foreigners. Poor Aang/Kuzon gets called “mannerless colony slob” just for being slow on the bowing action (!!!)

(in firebender’s guide I had a lot of fun imagining the stupid microaggressions Ambassador Sokka has to face in the Fire Nation, so obviously I’m just biased)

4.WRITING AND DESKS

Characters would probably write on paper, with a calligraphy brush. Not quills or pens -- a brush. Technically, old Japanese and Chinese texts should be written top to bottom, right to left, but the show itself doesn’t do this, so I think you’re fine. 

One fun thing about traditional calligraphy is that you don’t use bottled ink. You have something called an ink stone, and then you grind your ink yourself by rubbing the ink stone in a special little dish with a bit of water. In my (very few) encounters with this stuff in the calligraphy lessons of my youth, the ink stones can be plain or have beautiful designs on the side. It looks something like this: 

ATLA is an East Asian-ish universe, so characters are likely to be kneeling at a table, not sitting. To demonstrate, here’s my boy Sokka doing his famous rainbow at Piandao’s:

and here’s the war chamber meeting when Zuko speaks out against a general’s plans to sacrifice some soldiers:

THERE ARE EXCEPTIONS: This is Zuko’s cute little setup when he’s writing his goodbye letter to Mai. In this case he’s writing in a chair and table. It’s possible that some furniture items, like a sitting desk and a bed in a bedframe (not a bedroll or futon) are special royal palace features. Normally in a private setting we see characters sitting on the ground or on a slightly elevated platform with a low table. Maybe Caldera is just different? Or rich people are just different: the Bei Fongs also have a sit-down dining table + chair setup.

(That little rectangular box is his ink dish!!)

5.A NOTE ON GENERAL CULTURE

It’s worth talking about a few general points of East Asian culture. I can’t claim to speak for ALL of Asia, and I don’t think I should. But I do think ATLA fic writers who want to set something in the Fire Nation should take a few moments to at least skim the wiki pages for filial piety and Nihonjinron (literally, "theories/discussions about the Japanese"). There’s a certain...vibe to...asianness... that I’m not sure I can explain without like, a doctorate degree in sociology. 

It’s a bit like gender, I guess. There’s no definitive checklist to what is a woman and what is a man, and we can argue that gender is performative, that it’s a construct, but at the end of the day gender is still (tragically) real in the sense that it still shapes people and affects how we walk and talk and dress and think. Nationality is the same. Obviously, the Fire Nation is a made up place in a made up show, but out of respect to the cultures that inspired it, I do think it’s worth familiarizing yourself with some of these cultures’ codes and values.

Also, ahem, if I can direct you to war crimes in the Japan’s colonial empire. Again, worth remembering that the Fire Nation was an imperalist colonizer too.

I might do a continuation of this post and talk through my more abstract takes about Fire Nation culture - Is Zuko an example of filial piety gone right or filial piety gone wrong? Why I think Zuko’s flashbacks are like, at least part teenage melodrama bullshit (the reason is son preference), how someone like Sokka might be treated once he’s openly Water Tribe in the Fire Nation (probably with racism...), specific aspects of asian homophobia and racism, etc. We’ll see.

This is not a definitive guide. Comments and critique welcome.

If you think there’s a factual mistake, PLEASE hop in my asks and let me know. I also think there’s a huge blind spot in ATLA for South and Southeast Asian representation, so I acknowledge that I can’t speak for all Asians, and there is no such thing as a “pan-asian” identity.

If there’s something else you’re curious about, I’m not a historian or anything, but I like research. Ask me and I’ll try to answer the best I can.

And oh, one last thing, this is how I do research when I wrote firebender’s guide, in case anyone’s interested in learning more (LINK)

[nothing-more-than-hot-leaf-juice]

hey i have a question! i’m curious about your opinion bc you always seem to have smart takes on atla meta: does azula underestimate non benders? at first i thought obviously not, since the allies she chose are two non-bending fighters (who have the advantage of often being underestimated). but then again... did she choose mai and ty lee because she thought non benders would defer to her, while other firebenders might challenge her authority? and what about her interactions with sokka? thoughts?

First, this post summarized Azula’s mentality and respect of non-benders perfectly and there’s honestly nothing I can add to it. TLDR (but you really should read, this post is a fantastic bit of analysis/Sokka appreciation): Azula 100% sees the strength of allying herself with nonbenders and recognizes Sokka for not just his fighting abilities, but for his leadership status.

What made Azula an effective antagonist wasn’t her firebending abilities or the people she had backing her up, her strength was in her ability to read and manipulate people. She was a threat because she was smart. Azula was able to conquer Ba Sing Se not because she was a good firebender, but because she was ‘a people person’. Let’s remember, she took command of the Dai Li up from under Long Feng without even having to think about firebending. Some of Azula’s most iconic villain moments were entirely a product of her political charisma. “Don’t flatter yourself, you were never even a player.” “Do the tides command this ship?” “Unless, the Avatar’s alive...all that glory would be turned to shame.” Pure charisma, no bending necessary. 

Long Feng: “And the Fire Nation princess is cooperating?” 

Dai Li agent: “Oh yes. More than cooperating-- she’s really taken charge. She’s terrifying and inspirational at the same time. It’s hard to explain.” 

Azula doesn’t regard people as threats when she knows she can easily manipulate them. That’s the real reason she doesn’t regard Zuko as a threat in the series. In Crossroads of Destiny, she knew that if she just said the right words to push the right buttons in Zuko’s brain, there was no doubt he would join her. From the beginning of season two to the end of season two, Azula knew that all she would have to say to get Zuko in the exact state of mind she wanted him to be in was “father wants you to return home” and “you will have father’s love.” Zuko could have listened to Iroh and joined Aang and Katara, but Azula knew that that was his weakness, his hope that he could regain his honor. He wanted his father’s love and acceptance more than anything and she knew that. So she exploited it and Zuko sided with her. 

She does the same thing with Sokka on the day of the eclipse. Azula recognized him as the leader, could read him as a protector, knew his relationship with Suki, and was able to stop them because she taunted him. She pushed the right buttons. She got him to stop thinking tactically and they never reached Ozai. 

Azula did something similar with Zuko twice in the series by targeting the people he cared about to divert his attention. The first was in The Chase when she was cornered and hit Iroh. Zuko wasn’t going to go after her when Iroh was hurt and she knew that. She does the same thing in Sozin’s Comet when she directs lightning at Katara, knowing not only that this is someone Zuko cares about, but that Zuko would never want someone to get hurt when it’s his fight. He’s always been noble and protective and Azula knew how to use that to her advantage. It wasn’t her firebending that gave her power over Zuko throughout the series, it was her ability to exploit his weaknesses.

Azula knows the power of fire, but what she knows is more important for herself and others is the power of manipulation. She looks at people and gathers two things: 1. what their weaknesses are and 2. how exploiting those weaknesses can benefit her. That’s why she wins. That’s what made her an excellent villain. The fact that she was seemingly always two steps ahead of everyone because she just read people that well. 

And there’s the other aspect where she regards caring as a weakness because that’s what she was taught. She differentiates herself from Zuko, Sokka, and Katara because she sees them as weak for caring. Because in her life, she’s been taught that caring is a weakness that needs to be snuffed out. She watched Iroh lose the siege of Ba Sing Se because of his grief. She watched Zuko get burned and banished because he cared about defenseless soldiers and didn’t want to fight their father. That’s what she believes. Azula expects practicality and ruthlessness because that’s what’s always been expected of her. We see this especially with how she commands Mai and Ty Lee and how she doesn’t hesitate to lock them away when they betray her. She’s been conditioned not to care, not to love. Even if she does, she doesn’t let herself let that affect her decision making. Caring makes you weak; it makes you vulnerable. And that was the last thing Azula wanted to be. 

She surrounded herself by allies who could prove to her that they valued loyalty more than love. She tested Ty Lee’s love for the circus when she got the circus master to set the ring on fire. She tested Mai’s love for her family when she gave her the choice to go through with the hostage trade for her brother. And she tested Zuko’s love for Iroh when she gave him the choice in the catacombs. In each of these instances, she exploited their fears to make them side with her, but in the end they choose love over loyalty, overcoming their fears (but that’s a whole separate post). Azula valued them for their loyalty and their willingness to put feelings aside to do what she wanted, but that didn’t last. 

Azula does think she’s stronger and smarter, but not because of her firebending, it’s because she doesn't care as much. She considers herself a pragmatist, not bound by love for other people. Mostly because she internalized the notion that she was never going to get it. Azula believed she was a monster. Unlovable. So she decided that those who did rely on love to keep them going and to make them strong were the weak ones. She convinced herself that “fear was the only reliable way” because it was easier to believe that she was right and that she was going to be victorious rather than confront the fact that she was alone. 

Mirror Ursa: “I think you’re confused. All your life you’ve used fear to control people. Like your friends Mai and Ty Lee.” 

Azula: “Well what choice did I have? Trust is for fools. Fear is the only reliable way. Even you fear me.” 

Mirror Ursa: “No I love you Azula. I do.” 

That’s why she’s dangerous and that’s why she’s tragic. Azula’s wasn’t bound by people the way anyone else was. She wasn’t going to jump in front of lighting to save her friend or lose a siege over grief. Azula lived in a perpetual competition and in order to win --win her father’s favoritism, win battles, win the throne-- she didn’t give herself room to care. That’s why she thought she was better than her opponents. And Azula only thought she was worth anything if she was winning.

Azula wanted to be perfect. She wasn’t give a choice but to be perfect. And if she cared, if she let love for other people cloud her judgement or if she let herself rely on others who would inevitably think she was unlovable, then she would lose. And in the end, the isolation and the emptiness were two of the major factors that drove her into the deep end. And she didn’t have anyone there to save her from drowning. 

[scarletemeterio-thesecond]

Hey, sorry if I'm bothering you, but I wanted to ask if you could do a part two of Heartbreak and Betrayal. I really like the story, but it's sad that it ended that way 🥺,maybe a fluffy ending for the second part(?). 🌻 Btw english it's not my first language, sorry if I made mistakes! Have a nice day!🥺💕

Omg, thank you for being so sweet, and you're definitely not bothering me! Don't worry, english is not my first language either! Hope you have a nice day too! <3

Thank you so much for requesting a part 2! I actually had a few ideas to continue that imagine but I wasn't sure if anyone would want to read it. It's literally the longest thing I've ever written, I hope you like it!

•••

Making Things Right (Zuko x Reader)

Warnings: Mention of toes, mentions of scars

Genre: Fluff

Fandom: Avatar, The Last Airbender

Summary: Zuko and reader meet up again after the events at Ba Sing Se

Word Count: 4389

part 1

Joining the Avatar was one of the best things that have ever happened to me. I didn't only find amazing friends, I found a new family. I haven't been with them for long but we've already had a lot of adventures.

Right now, we were at the Western Air Temple since our plans for the invasion didn't work very well. We tried to talk to Aang about defeating the Fire Lord, but he didn't pay much attention. We needed to find a firebending teacher for him before the comet, and we had no idea where to look for one. We decided to follow Aang since we needed to find a solution to this problem. Once we all were back on land, Toph spoke, and we soon realized we had company. He was here, in front of us. The person I thought -and wished- I'd never see again, right there a few meters away from us.

He said he wanted to join us and even started talking about how much he had changed; I didn't believe anything he said. I hated to admit it, but the opportunity to let a potential firebending teacher go was kind of stupid but we were talking about Zuko here, the guy who had betrayed us; and he even said he sent that assassin after us! Apparently, I wasn't the only one who didn't want him here so we kicked him out.

"Why would he try to fool us like that?" asked Katara.

"Obviously, he wants to lead us into some kind of trap" said Sokka.

"This is just like when we were in prison together in Ba Sing Se" started saying the waterbender.

I wanted to agree with them, to say that I didn't believe any word he said but I just couldn't. I wanted to hate him, but a part of me knew we needed him, so I just stayed silent while they continued talking, with Aang joining them.

"He wasn't lying" said Toph, snapping me out of my thoughts. "And I'm just saying that considering his messed-up family and how he was raised, he could've turned out a lot worse".

"You're right, Toph. Let's go find him and give him a medal. The 'not as much of a jerk as you could've been' award" said Katara, clearly starting to get annoyed.

"All I know is that while he was talking to us, he was sincere. Maybe you're all just letting your hurt feelings to keep you from thinking clearly. Well, all except (Y/N), not a single bad word about him has left your mouth" she commented and I immediately wanted to kill her for pointing that out.

"Why would you even try to defend him, Toph?"

"Because, Katara, you're all ignoring one crucial fact: Aang needs a firebending teacher. We can't think of a single person in the world to do the job. Now one shows up on a silver platter and you won't even think about it?"

"I'm not having Zuko as my teacher" said Aang.

"Ugh, I'm beginning to wonder who's really the blind one around here" and after saying that, she left.

There was an awkward silence in the air, and I knew they would practically hate me for what I was about to say.

"She's right".

"No way, (Y/N)! The guy literally broke your heart and you're still defending him?"

"I'm not defending him, Sokka! I'm just saying that we should consider him as Aang's firebending teacher. Where would we find another person willing to do it?"

"You're just saying that just because somehow you still love him" said Katara in an angry tone.

"You have no idea how I feel" I said immediately. "And I thought I made myself very clear when I said I didn't want to talk about any of that the moment I joined you. Toph is right, you're all blind here".

After saying that, I started walking away. Once I got to a quiet place in the Temple, I sat down with my back against the wall, and as soon as my body touched the floor, I started crying. I didn’t know why, but I felt so frustrated, I was angry, sad, and even though I hated to admit it, I missed him so much. I often wondered what would’ve happened if things had been different and it only made me feel worse because I knew it made no sense to wish for something impossible, but sometimes I just wanted him by my side. I realized that Toph was approaching me and I quickly tried to get rid of my tears.

"Are you okay?" she asked me as she sat next to me. I loved how good of a friend she was and how much she cared about all of us, even if she didn’t show it all the time. "I know you were crying and I can imagine what happened but I’ll let you tell me about it if you want, yeah?" I nodded.

"I just told them you were right, about Aang needing a firebending teacher and… well, here I am. I know that he did bad things in the past, I personally experienced some of them, but we can’t let this opportunity go to waste and Katara started telling me that I was just saying that because I still loved him".

"Well, she’s not wrong, (Y/N)".

"I know, it’s just that- It made me feel even worse than I already feel because I know that I shouldn’t have feelings for him after everything that happened but I just can’t help it". I could feel the tears running down my face again. "I’m just so hurt, Toph. And I’ve even dreamt of seeing him again and exchanging a conversation with him but at the same time I feel like it’s not worth it; like he was just pretending with me the whole time".

"You have every right to feel like that" she started saying.

"But?"

"But maybe talking to him wouldn’t be such a bad idea" I knew she was right but deep down I tried to convince myself that she wasn’t. "I’m not saying you have to do it, not if you don’t want to. Maybe if he ends up joining us, you could take some baby steps, you know?"

"Yeah, I guess that doesn’t sound so bad" I admitted out loud. She smiled briefly and then she punched my arm and I couldn’t help but smile at her action. Toph was just so Toph sometimes. She got up and left, leaving me by myself, now a lot more at peace with my thoughts than before. I stayed there for a while and finally decided to go back to the others since it was getting late and it was my turn to make dinner.

We all ate in silence, there was a slightly uncomfortable silence, which was broken by my voice, asking if anyone had seen the little earthbender. Everyone said that they hadn’t seen or heard of her since earlier today and I found that pretty unusual.

"I’m sorry for reacting the way I did today" I said.

"No, (Y/N), I’m sorry for talking to you like that. I shouldn’t have told you what I did" said Katara, grabbing my hand and smiling at me. "We know you meant no harm, and we shouldn’t have been that mean to you". I accepted her apology, but I knew she still didn’t like the idea of Zuko joining us. After dinner, we all went to bed and it didn’t take long for me to fall asleep.

I woke up with the sun hitting my face. I stayed in my room for a few minutes and I finally decided to get up and go outside. Everyone was already up, which didn’t surprise me at all since I was extremely tired last night, so it made sense that I was the last to wake up. It was Katara’s turn to make lunch, but I decided to help her; I wanted to do something and I also wanted to spend some time with her. We shared some much-needed laughs and I felt so grateful to have a friend like her in my life; we had our fights, but at the end of the day, we were always there for each other and I loved that about our friendship. When we were done, we quickly started serving the food and she began to wonder where Toph was.

"I haven’t seen her since she stormed off yesterday" said Sokka.

"Maybe she’s just exploring the Air Temple" commented Haru. "There are some pretty fun spots to practice earthbending".

"I think we should go look for her".

"Oh, let her have fun with her rocks. I’m in no rush to have her yelling at us again".

"I don’t know, I think Katara is right. I haven’t seen her for a while and I’m starting to get worried" I said.

Then, we heard a loud noise and everything moved around us, and Toph fell from a little pile of rocks.

"Toph, what happened?"

"My feet got burned" she answered and Katara quickly started healing her feet.

"Oh, no, what happened?" she asked worriedly again.

"I just told you, my feet got burned".

"I meant how".

"Well, I kind of went to see Zuko last night".

"What?" I asked as the others reacted surprised too.

"I just thought he could be helpful to us and if I talked to him, maybe we could work something out".

"So he attacked you?" asked Sokka, also worried.

"Well, he did and he didn’t" said Toph before saying that it had been an accident.

"See, you trusted Zuko and you got burned… literally" said Sokka. "And it’s not the first time this happens, we can’t trust him".

As he said that, I immediately touched my arm, which now had a scar thanks to everything that had happened back in Ba Sing Se. They all kept talking but I didn’t pay any attention to them, I was concentrated on my thoughts. I didn’t think much about my scar but when I did, it just took me back to the catacombs. Suddenly, there was a loud explosion and we tried to hide as soon as possible. Just before doing that, we saw Zuko telling Combustion Man to stop hunting Aang, but he paid no attention and continued anyways. We tried to fight back since we had to do something if we didn’t want anything bad to happen to us. Thankfully, Sokka had the amazing idea of using his boomerang, which literally saved us. Well, along with Zuko. He was climbing from a root, trying not to fall and he didn’t.

"I can’t believe I’m saying this but thanks, Zuko" said Aang.

"Listen, I know I didn’t explain myself very well yesterday. I’ve been through a lot in the past years, and it’s been hard. But I’m realizing that I had to go through all those things to learn the truth." He looked at me while saying that and it didn’t take me long to break the eye contact between us. "I thought I had lost my honor and that somehow my father could return it to me. But I know now that no one can give you your honor. It’s something you earn for yourself by choosing to do what’s right. And all I want now is to play my part in ending this war, I know my destiny is to help you restore balance to the world".

I could see that Aang’s expression was a lot softer now as Zuko kept talking, and I realized mine was too.

"I’m sorry for what I did to you. It was an accident." He said to Toph. "Fire can be dangerous and wild. So as a firebender, I need to be more careful and control my bending so I don’t hurt people unintentionally".

"I think you are supposed to be my firebending teacher" said Aang. "When I first tried to learn firebending, I burned Katara. And after that, I never wanted to firebend again. But now I know you understand how easy it is to hurt the people you love" I lifted my head at his words, feeling the young Avatar’s eyes on me and I quickly looked at Zuko before looking away once more. "I’d like you to teach me".

"Thank you. I’m so happy you’ve accepted me into your group".

"Not so fast. I still have to ask my friends if it’s okay with them" he then proceeded to ask every single one of us our opinion on the matter, and I felt my heart beating fast when he said my name.

"You need a firebending teacher, it would be dumb of us to refuse his offer" I said, and that made it official: Zuko was now part of our group.

Having him around was a bit weird at first, but as the days went by, I got used to his presence. I hated to admit it but having him around wasn’t so bad after all. We were now having dinner, and we were glad Zuko and Katara were fine after their trip together. It was weird to be camping, but I liked to be outdoors, so it didn’t bother me; well, except for the cold, of course. We stayed around the fire for a while after we finished eating, but we finally decided to go to bed since we had to get up early in order to go to Ember Island. Everyone had gone to their tents but I stayed outside for a while, drawing whatever went through my mind.

"Here" I heard a voice say. I looked up and I was met up with Zuko’s face, and he was offering me his robe. I looked at him confused and he sat by my side. "You’re cold, I can tell because you’re curling your toes" he said.

"Thanks" I said, grabbing his robe and putting it on. He stayed there beside me and asked me what I was drawing. "Just Momo sleeping". As I said that I gestured with my head to show him where the lemur was, and he let out a smile.

"I know I said this a couple of times already but I’m glad to see you again and I-" he said, but I interrupted him.

"Please, Zuko, I don’t want to talk about it now. It’s late, I’m tired, and I’d very much rather have this conversation at any other moment; not now, please". I begged, not wanting to deal with this right now. He nodded and told me he understood, but that we would have to talk sooner or later. "I know, I’m still very confused. Give me some time to figure out my feelings, please".

"I will, I promise".

We stayed there in silence for a few minutes while I finished my drawing. Once I was done, I started getting up to go to my tent, and when I was going to give Zuko back his robe, he told me to keep it. I smiled at him and started walking away, but I turned around and walked back to him.

"Here, I want you to have it" I said while giving him my drawing. He smiled and thanked me. We stood there, looking at each other for a few seconds until he said it was late and that we both should go to bed.

"Good night, (Y/N)". Right before walking away, he gave me a quick kiss on my cheek and I was glad it was dark enough for him to not see that I was blushing. I went to my tent and tried to be as silent as possible since I thought Katara would be already asleep.

"Did you guys kiss?" I heard her ask.

"Spirits, Katara, you scared me!" I yelled in a whisper.

"I'm sorry. Did you, though?"

"No, nothing happened" I said, hoping she'd believe me. I took off Zuko's robe and started getting inside my sleeping bag as Katara spoke again.

"Then why do you have his robe?"

"I was cold and he gave it to me, okay?" I looked at her and I realized she wouldn't leave me alone unless I told her everything, so I did. "I'm just so confused" I said after telling her, letting out a sigh.

"I think you're just scared of him hurting you again" she said. "And I get it, he really hurt you and you have every right to be mad, but I see the way he looks at you, (Y/N)".

"That's the thing, I don't even think I'm mad anymore. I guess you're right and I'm probably just scared, but I don't want to be".

"You still need some time".

"How much?" I asked. "Because if I'm being honest I miss him a lot and I just want to be with him, and it's already been a while since he joined us. It's like I'm just a tiny little step away from being ready".

"As much as you need, (Y/N). You'll know when you're ready, trust me". She grabbed my hand in order to reassure me and I smiled at her. "Maybe you're ready and you just don't want to admit it to yourself" she whispered.

She then proceeded to say good night and quickly fell asleep. I was tired, but I just wasn't able to stop thinking about my shared moment with Zuko and what Katara said to me. Maybe she was right and I was ready; maybe I was just scared of being ready, of getting hurt again. I could feel my head starting to hurt a little, but still I thankfully managed to fall asleep, which was actually a blessing since I didn't want to be tired for our trip.

Being at Ember Island felt extremely weird, but it was the best place we had to hide until the comet. Aang and Zuko were training, and Katara, Toph, and I were sitting in the corner. We were all talking when suddenly Sokka and Suki told us about a play that, supposedly, told our story.

"We were just in town and we found this poster" said Suki and then Sokka showed us said poster.

"Listen to this. The Boy In The Iceberg is a new production from acclaimed playwright Puan Tin, who scoured the globe gathering information on the Avatar" he started saying, reading what was on the poster.

"Do you really think it's a good idea for us to attend a play about us?" asked Katara.

"Oh, come on. A day at the theater? This is the kind of time-wasting nonsense I've been missing" said her brother. And so we decided to go that night. I honestly didn't know what to expect, but we honestly needed to take a break.

The day went by pretty quick, and soon we had to get ready to go.

"I think that maybe you should take of that shirt" said Katara, looking at the one I was wearing under my fire nation attire. "We don't want people to suspect we're not from the Fire Nation, and your shirt is blue".

I sighed in frustration but I knew she was right. However, I didn't want to take it out, mainly because I was a bit self-conscious about my scar; it was the only reason I used my long sleeve shirt.

"Could you come and help me?" I asked the waterbender. "I can't put this top back on my by myself". She nodded and we went inside for a moment. I had taken off my blue shirt and when she was helping me with my red one, she noticed something was wrong.

"I can stay here with you if you don't feel comfortable going out without covering it" she said, talking about my scar. I honestly considered accepting her offer for a moment. I wasn't that self-conscious about my scar anymore, but covering it was easier: I didn't have to worry about people looking at me, or things like that. But tonight I didn't really care about what anyone could think, so I refused.

"It's nothing, Katara. We should go, we don't want to be late" I said right before she finished helping me with my top. I thanked her and we went back outside to meet the others. We were all ready and so we left.

When we got to the theater, we quickly went to our sits since the play was about to begin. I sat between Zuko and Katara, with Aang and Toph at each end of the bench.

Everything up till the intermission was kind of weird; the guys have told me some things that happened before I joined them, but seeing some actors recreating that was extremely funny.

"Look guys, I know it must hurt but what you're seeing up there is the truth" said Toph before going back to our sits.

When it was Toph's moment to appear in the play, she got excited. She was played by some guy and she actually found that extremely funny, and so did I; maybe coming here hadn't been such a bad idea after all.

Or maybe it was. I wasn't in the play, and when they were acting the whole catacombs situation, they made it seem like Katara and Zuko liked each other. I knew they didn't, but it still made me feel weird and I could tell they felt the same. Suddenly, Aang got up and left and a few moments later, I decided to do the same. I sat on the floor with my back against the wall, waiting for the next intermission. It wasn't long till everyone got out, and Toph, Zuko and I stayed there while Katara went to look for Aang and Sokka went backstage with Suki.

"Geez, everyone's getting so upset about their characters. Even you seem more down than usual, and that's saying something" said the earthbender to Zuko.

"At least you guys are in the play, they didn't even mention me" I said under my breath.

"You don't get it, Toph. You get a muscly version of yourself taking down ten bad guys at once and making sassy remarks".

"Yeah, that's pretty great" said the little girl.

"But for me, it takes all the mistakes I've made in my life and shoves them back in my face. Even the ones they don't talk about!" After hearing that, I didn't even think before acting, I just grabbed his hand and started caressing it. He kept talking about his uncle but I didn't say anything; I just stayed there in silence, letting them talk.

We went back in for the last part of the play. To be honest, I was a little bored and just wanted to head back to the house. I could tell I wasn't the only one, and there was a weird tension in the air. We all were a bit shocked at the end of the play, and on the way back to the house we all talked about how bad it actually was. Once we got there, everyone quickly went to bed, and when I was leaving, Zuko told me to stop.

"Is now a good time to talk?" he asked and I slowly nodded. We sat near the fountain, next to each other. "I don't know what the playwright was thinking, but that thing with Katara never happened at the catacombs" he said after a while.

"I know" I whispered. "It was just a play" I reassured him. He nodded and let out a sigh before talking again.

"I have so many things to say but I don't know where to begin with I-" he took a deep breath, trying to remain calm. "I just want to make things right".

"I'm not mad at you anymore, Zuko" I said. "I used to be so angry and sad, I guess I needed some time".

"I understand. I'm so sorry for everything that happened, I feel so guilty for betraying you and for hurting you" he said the last part while looking briefly at my arm. "If I could go back to that day, I… I don't know what I would do, honestly".

"We can't change the past, Zuko" I said. "I just have one question and I need you to answer me with the truth. Did you ever feel something for me? Or were you just faking the whole time?" I could tell my heart was beating fast, and I even had some tears that threatened to fall down my cheeks.

"Every single moment with you was true" he said. "I really loved you, and I regret never saying it out loud because I know that it's too late now".

"What do you mean?" I asked, looking at him in the eyes.

"I never stopped loving you, (Y/N). Yes, I came here to help Aang, but also because I wanted to see you again. But after being around you for a while I realized that maybe you're better off without me".

"Don't say that" I whispered, preparing myself for what I was about to say, but before he words could leave my mouth he started talking again.

"But it's true. And I know deep down that I'll always love you, but I can't make you love me back if you don't and I-" I cut him off by grabbing his neck in order to press my lips against his.

"I do love you, Zuko. I never stopped loving you" he looked at me surprised, and I didn't know if it was because of what I just said or the kiss. Nevertheless, I kissed him again, and this time he kissed me back; the kiss was sweet and at the same time kind of desperate, and when I backed off a bit, I could tell he had a little smile on his face.

"I missed kissing you so much" he said, cupping my face to then give me a quick kiss on my nose. "I missed you so much" he whispered.

"I missed you too" I said right before hugging him and placing my head on his chest. He kissed my forehead and suddenly, right here with his arms around me, I felt at home.

[talks-refined]

Why azula, in my opinion, shouldn’t have had a redemption arc

i know it’s a complicated subject in this fandom but i wanted to give my two cents on it! i promise this isn’t me just going “booh evil”

okay so here’s the thing. the reason this is so complicated to answer is because it needs to ask pretty existential and complex questions like, can everyone be redeemed? how is evil made? how much of you is really only your upbringing? is it possible to be inherently bad? what do we fundamentally deserve? can you separate yourself completely from what you’ve been since birth and if so, what’s left?

now if you walked up to me and asked those questions, my answer would probably be something along the lines of “i don’t know, i just got here”. so that’s not what i’m gonna try to answer here

notice how i said “shouldn’t have had” and not “deserved”. i can’t tell you what azula “deserved”— probably a nicer childhood and therapy— but i can also say azula didn’t “deserve” anything. she’s a character, she’s words on paper, animation and voiced acting. there isn’t a real azula, an actual 14 years old child soldier out there awaiting to turn good. characters are story arcs, development, goals... what makes their value isn’t morals but what they bring to the story. and azula brings so much that, in my opinion, being ultimately redeemed would cheapen

first off: zuko. i’ve seen people say azula shouldn’t get a redemption arc because then her story would just be the same as zuko. it’s... not true, obviously, they’re different characters for a reason, but there is a part of truth i wanna point out here:

zuko and azula’s stories are diametrical opposites. two siblings, a boy and a girl, a firebending prodigy and one who’s average at the very best, one favored by his mother, the other favored by her father, one impulsive and one calculating. At the beginning of the story, one angry and unstable, the other calm and confident, one banished, desperate and without honor, and the other a princess and leader, acclaimed by all, who radiates regal energy.

“(ozai) said she was born lucky. he said i was lucky to be born. i don’t need luck, though. i don’t want it. i’ve always had to struggle and fight and that’s made me strong. that’s made me who i am.”

( zuko, to aang, season 1 finale )

that first sentence was the hook that told the viewers azula would come in the picture in season 2 and it tells you exactly the opposite dynamics their characters would develop on. azula is perfect, zuko is a failure is the message we’re supposed to get, at least that’s how they view each other and themselves, because that’s what their father taught them. but here’s the thing: luck is by definition elusive, and perfection is by definition unattainable. azula spends her life building herself around the vision that failure is inexcusable. because she’s at such a high place, because she’s so perfect, she can never fail, because she can’t and because she’s not allowed to. that mentality is bound to doom her, it’s inevitable. it’s a direct opposition to zuko, who builds himself in the fact that he’s failed so many times, that he made so many mistakes, that each taught him lessons. when zuko fails once, he knows he can get up because he was miserable for so long that it taught him he can survive anything. when azula fails once, she crumbles. azula is a cautionary tale of perfectionism, and cautionary tales can’t have happy endings. zuko’s approach of life has to reach a happy ending, because he’ll always look for one, it has to reach a redemption arc because he’s not scared of the mistakes he’s made in the past and he is always trying to better himself (the redemption comes when he realises he was trying to meet the wrong standards). azula’s approach of life guarantees a downfall because she’s convinced that failure is the end.

both their stories mirror each other, backwards. when we meet zuko, he’s failing, always, and when we leave him, he finally won. when we meet azula she’s winning, always, and when we leave her, she finally (by which i mean that it’s inevitable, not that it’s good) fails.

and there’s another reason (let’s pretend this is structured, okay?), that’s a little more complicated, and it has to do with ozai.

you know how ozai is barely present in the series? i’ve seen some people argue that azula is a better villain because she’s scarier or because we see her more. here’s the thing:

when you’re trying to portray something that’s really, really awful, it’s easier not show it. when you show something, in it’s entirety (in that context that would mean making ozai a deep, 3 dimensional character that we see develop) it’s... small. to define is to limit (- oscar wilde). when you only show small things tho, details, in movies it can be shadows, think the beginning of stranger things when you don’t see monsters, but can feel a threat, that’s when it can get scary as shit. because whatever limited, physical (or character-ial? is that a word) form you chose for the villain isn’t there in people’s minds, it’s only their own imagination trying to comprehend what you made them feel. and what people imagine based on only fear, or anger, is easily scarier than any five headed monster you can put onscreen.

that’s what ozai is: a looming threat. hell, i’m not even sure we see his face until season 3. he only has a handful of scenes. but i hate him. i hate him so much i could scream into a pillow and he’s so vicious it sends shivers down my spine. you know why? because of what he did to zuko and azula.

when you wanna keep your main villain mysterious, it’s good to give the audience characters that he’s interacted with. characters that he’s close to enough to have had an effect on them, so they can perceive a part of him. and boy did he have an effect on his children

( to be fair here: that idea and most of what i’m saying about it came from Overly Sarcastic Productions video on minions as a trope. it’s really good i love their whole channel, red is amazing)

season 1: meet zuko. he’s a sixteen years old. he’s a bad guy, but written so that you sympathise with him to a certain extent. then comes the Tragic Backstory Episode and you learn that he was challenged to a duel as a thirteen years old by his father after he spoke without permission in a meeting, begged for mercy, got half of his face burned off at the hands of his father, and was banished from his home to search for the avatar, who was dead as far as anyone knew.

now you’ve seen very little of ozai after this episode, but you’re ready to fight that guy, right? i know i am.

it gains a level of depth with azula. after being introduced to a character who is starving for his father’s love and approval, we’re introduced to a new character, who seemingly has all of that. azula is zuko’s ever winning rival. she has everything he wants, her honor, her title, her father’s favors.

(i think it’s worth noting that making your children compete for your love is already a red flag for noticing pieces of shit)

but it’s not enough. azula has everything, she is everything ozai values (cunning, strong, ruthless) and even then it’s not enough to please him. nothing will ever be good enough. and you see two children fighting, breaking themselves to please a father that is seemingly incapable of love, but keeps baiting them, giving them impossible standards to reach so they’ll always keep trying to please him.

okay, now you hate him, right?

but here’s the thing: because azula was a firebending prodigy, she got a taste of her father’s approval. he saw himself in her, where he saw too much of iroh and ursa in zuko. he was proud of her.

he was never proud of zuko. too soft, not strong, or fearless enough. because of that, zuko was never close to his dad. all he got was disdain. because of that, he forms bonds with other people (with his mother and uncle, at first) that expose him to another vision of life. and in exile, after chasing relentlessly, part of him is pushed to the realisation that he can live without his father’s approval. because he had to.

azula on the other hand, quickly becomes all ozai’s. from flashbacks you can clearly tell each of them gravitates around one parent, zuko around ursa and azula around ozai. even in her other relationships (zuko, tylee, mai...) she behaves according to what her father taught her, how to manipulate and hurt others

and ursa has flaws, god i’m not saying she doesn’t. that deserves a post in itself. but she values things like kindness, softness and love. ozai values strength, power and cunning. childhood is a formative stage: you often build yourself on the way you were raised. zuko had those conflicting values, because ursa, and ozai more indirectly, both taught him. but ozai isolated azula from other (adult) presences. this is more speculation but i really think it’s true, for what it’s worth. we rarely ever see ursa and azula interact, and when we do ursa is i think always? reprimanding azula for something that ozai taught her. it doesn’t seem like they spend enough time together for her to teach her daughter a better way.

that’s the thing. ozai’s “love”, or at least approval, was azula’s curse. zuko thinks it’s something he has to aim for, and later realizes it’s only ever going to be conditional and manipulative and stops trying. because he knew another way. but azula always lived with it. it isolated her, prevented her from ever finding a better way. his “love” is what did this to her

so yeah. none of this is saying that azula could never have been good. she was 14, she had a whole life ahead, i’m not some psychology master that can tell you exactly if it’s even possible to unlearn so much manipulation and abuse- i want to believe it is. but this is a story, and to me it’s the more nuanced, more interesting, better story they could’ve written. i think having those two very different and very paralleled stories, for a show that doesn’t shy away from complexity the way atla does, was very important.

while i was writing this, i showed it to a friend, who can speak for toxic households better than i can, and gave me a new perspective and the best conclusion: when in an abusive parental relationship, there’s always a tearing hesitation between ‘breaking free’ and doing what’s best for you, and staying loyal to your parent, someone you’re supposed to love and who’s supposed to love you. zuko is a message of hope ; azula is a warning

[woeismyhoe]

Iroh and Ozai headcanons

It never seemed to me that Iroh really hated Ozai. More like he strongly disliked him and was simply uncaring and apathetic towards what happened to him (everybody was saying that Aang had to kill Ozai to end the war and Iroh didn’t show the slightest bit of concern). If Iroh genuinely hated him, he would try to kill Ozai himself or, at least, wouldn’t avoid confronting him as much as he did (he had 3 opportunities in canon where he could’ve/should’ve confronted him: the first was when Ozai became Fire Lord, the second was when Ozai fought an Agni Kai with Zuko, the third was at the end of the series when Zuko asked him to fight Ozai). Iroh completely avoids facing Ozai throughout the series.

In my opinion, Ozai and Iroh never got the chance to spend much time together nor bond both because of Azulon’s extreme favoritism of Iroh and because of their huge age difference. Honestly, the age difference between them seems to be much more than 10 years. I’ve heard people who believe there’s 30 years difference between them or that Iroh is over 70 years old. That’s a bit too much in my opinion, but it is still telling. Based on their physical appearance, Ozai is in his early 40s (the oldest I could he see him being is 45, though I personally headcanon him as being 41-42 in Book 3). By that same token, Iroh is in his early/mid 60s (I headcanon him as being 63-64 in Book 3). I mean, just look at them.

Seriously, if you didn’t know they were brothers and someone told you they were related, what would you think? I’d much sooner believe they are father and son, rather than siblings. I know some people think Iroh’s in his late 50s but that seems to be stretching it a bit (just like saying he’s over 70 is a stretch). Iroh was likely in his 50s during the Siege of Ba Sing Se, but not during the main events of the series. A good middle ground can be seen in Piandao and Tenzin. Both of them are clearly older than Ozai, but are also obviously younger than Iroh. They are in their 50s (heck, it was even confirmed that Tenzin is 51 in Book 1 and 55 in Book 4).

So, with 20 years difference between them, it means that Iroh wasn’t around much when Ozai was a child. Iroh was probably already fighting in the war by the time Ozai was born (Lu Ten is, at most, 10 years older than Zuko, as seen from the flashback in S03E05 The Beach, and he was already fighting in the war so it’s makes perfect sense that Iroh would be fighting in the war as a young adult too) and was well on his way to becoming a revered military leader. I’d say that’s also the reason why Ozai never had a chance at winning Azulon’s favor. Azulon already had a successful, perfect son and heir in Iroh and he didn’t care for a younger, inexperienced Ozai who was desperate and eager to prove himself. Simply put, Azulon didn’t need Ozai.

We know that Ozai has no military experience, we know that Ozai resented Iroh for being Azulon’s favorite and it was also confirmed multiple times in the Avatar Extras for Book 3 that Ozai is the most powerful firebender in the world (and his feats on the Day of Black Sun and under Sozin’s Comet back this up nicely). Furthermore we have this quote from Bryan Konietzko: “Ozai is not like some kind of palace dweller. We will say that. I’m not sure how much he’s ventured out into the world, but he’s not like the Earth King where he’s isolated. The Fire Nation is a little more ‘hands on’. It’s not uncommon that you will have to fight or duel for political or military positions or purposes. There’s a big difference. I think in the Fire Nation, unlike in Ba Sing Se, if there’s a prince who’s 30 years old, he’s probably fought pretty intensely a few times. Had to prove his worth. Not unlike Japanese Samurai in their day. They had to make a name for themselves, they had to have some fame. Fire Nation, like a lot of other militaristic cultures throughout history, has warriors who have to prove themselves either through some battle, test of martial skill, or duel. Fire Nation’s a little more aggressive like that. Ozai’s not sitting around eating Bon Bon’s in the palace, he’s working out.”

All this leads me to conclude that Ozai definitely tried to prove himself to his father, but Azulon never gave him an opportunity to lead his own military campaign. What did he do instead? He sent Ozai off to search for the Avatar (in S01E01 The Boy in the Iceberg it was stated by both Zuko and Iroh that Ozai, as well as Azulon and Sozin before him, had searched for the Avatar years ago). I imagine this was, much like in Zuko’s case, an attempt of a father to rid himself of his son, at least for a while. As we know, Ozai’s search resulted in failure and Azulon would likely see it as just another reason why Ozai is unworthy of being given any kind of opportunity to prove himself.

Well, I have a ton more headcanons regarding Ozai and FN Royal Family, but I won’t bother you with that now. As long as I’m talking about Iroh and Ozai, here’s an extremely well-made video that answers the eternal fan-debate of who would win in a fight between them. If you want to check out more A:TLA analyses, Seyary-Minamoto has some great ones: analysis of Ozai, analysis of Sokkla, analyses of Zuko, analyses of Azula in the comics, analysis of Fire Nation sexism.

[kristallioness]

21 Questions about ATLA

I was tagged by @atypicalkataangist. Wow, thanks for including me in this quiz! I've seen others reblog a list of numbered questions similar to these, expecting to receive some asks that they could answer in return. But now I get to do them in one go.

1) Who's your favourite male character?

I'm unoriginal and gonna say it's Aang. Not only because of him being the main character, but also because he was the first boy in the show who I immediately started to like (Sokka was second, Zuko was third in the beginning since he was a villain and I grew to love him more and more along with his character development), the way he balances his carefree, childish personality with his more mature, responsible side, his back story and peaceful culture.. Most importantly, without him, there wouldn't be the second half of such a lovely couple like he and Katara are.

2) Who's your favourite female character?

Katara. She's not only my favourite female character, but favourite character of them all, right from the start and until the end. The moment I saw her I fell in love since she looked really pretty and she wore a braid, just like me. Seeing what a caring, motherly, fierce personality she had (like mine) only fuelled my love for her.

3) What's your favourite quote?

Since Katara's my favourite character, then my first choice would be: "I will never, ever turn my back on people who need me!" Because that's sort of who I am and what I'm like, too. It's almost like a motto that I live by without thinking about it twice. I'm self-sacrificing and try to help my friends whenever they need it and as much as I can. I just remembered another good one, a quote that affected me on a more personal level. I'm pretty sure that only 0.0000000001% of the fandom would choose this one: "I don't care what I look like. I'm not looking for anyone's approval. I know who I am." The best part is, this is something that Toph says to Katara after she's been made fun of for her appearance by a bunch of prissy Upper Ring Earth Kingdom girls. How did this affect me? I started crying when I first saw this scene. Why? Because this was something that I'd been struggling with for years. I'd been bullied for my appearance at school. It used to make me feel worthless, unlovable, alone, probably also the reason why I turned into such a quiet person who doesn't know how to be around real friends. Hearing a blind, tomboyish, badass earthbender say what I needed to hear all along made me understand that it's not true - my appearance does not define my worth or who I am inside.

4) What's your favourite fight?

I knew you answered Katara and Pakku's duel @atypicalkataangist (and that one came to my mind, too, since it is one of my favourites because of reasons), but since I recently rewatched "The Serpent's Pass", I'm gonna pick Aang and Katara beating up that huge serpent. That was some awesome bending teamwork there! I went through all of the episodes in my head, and I gotta say that I also really like the duel between Aang and Zuko in "Bato of the Water Tribe". And one of the first ones where Haru and his father Tyro, along with the rest of the earthbenders, fight their way to freedom in the prison. The ending of that episode always leaves me with such a powerful feeling.

5) What's your favourite episode?

The big finale, "Sozin's Comet, Part 4: Avatar Aang". I sobbed practically throughout the entire episode when I first saw it. The soundtrack playing in the end is so beautiful to listen to and it still brings tears to my eyes. This episode concludes everything the show set up in the most unexpected ways possible. I mean, did any of us foresee Zuko being crowned the new Fire Lord (after you watched the first episode)? Did our hearts break into a million pieces when Katara and Aang kissed and became a couple in the end? Enough said.

6) From which nation would you like to be?

I'm not sure whether this is cheating or not, but since the story of ATLA continues in the comics and during Korra's time, I'd really love to be from the United Republic of Nations. I just love how it's a nation of mixed cultures, I am in LOVE with Republic City (as well as its 1920's aesthetic) and the capital reminds me of my own (Tallinn is also near the sea, has a marvellous silhouette, 4 seasons). Or if not, then my choice would definitely be the Water Tribes. I've explained it pretty well under the description of this drawing of mine.

7) Which element would you like to be able to bend and why?

Easy, I'd pick water since my 2nd choice when applying for university 5 years ago was to become a doctor. I'd like to use my healing abilities to cure people and my graceful waterbending to battle bad guys like Katara!

8) Favourite animal in the Avatar Universe?

I'm probably unoriginal, but I'm torn between the sky bison or the dragons. Oh, and the ostrich horses!

9) Who would you like to be your teacher and why?

I'm thinking it could be either Katara, Aang or Zuko, in this exact order. Katara and Aang would both be really supportive and I consider Zuko to be really wise (remember what he said to Korra before departing? he learned so much throughout the years).

10) What was the saddest moment in the show?

I have an entire list of the scenes/moments that made me cry, let me check.. *reads* Which sad moment made me cry the most, I'mma pick that one.. Okay, I can't decide because there are a few, let me name them: * the ones that stand out the most are all 3 finales * when Katara thought that her mother was alive in the swamp * when Aang enters the Avatar State and wants to kill the sandbenders, but Katara doesn't run away and instead grabs his hand and pulls him back down into her embrace and they cry together * Iroh singing the lullaby to his deceased son on his birthday (my parents have always said that one of the worst things a parent can live through is the death of their own child, so when I saw this scene, I understood what they meant and started crying) * Jet's death * Aang unlocking his heart chakra * almost the entirety of "The Awakening" (because everything seemed so hopeless and going the wrong way, when Katara and Hakoda talked), seriously, this is the most depressing episode in my book and that's why I love it so much * Sokka talking to Toph about how he's forgotten what his mother looks like and Katara is the one who's taken her place * when the invasion fleet was defeated on the Day of Black Sun and Katara knelt down beside Aang to comfort him * Zuko and his uncle Iroh's reconciliation and his speech to Team Avatar before they departed

11) What was the most shocking moment in the show?

You answered the same way: Aang getting shot with lightning. It came out of nowhere. When I saw Katara's face full of hope I thought that now they were going to make it since Aang had the power to face the Dai Li as well as Zuko and Azula. In a split second, everything changed and took a turn for the worst.

12) What was the funniest moment in the show?

There are so many good jokes, how do you expect me to pick just one??? Okay, umm.. when Sokka tried to fight against the villagers who believed too much of Aunt Wu's fortunes with logic and rational thinking (I can relate to him, poor Sokka).. How Aang messed up and unintentionally made Katara upset by insulting her instead of giving her a compliment when they were lost in the caves. Or the time Sokka and Katara had to pose as Aang's parents to go to the principal's office after school.

13) What was the most unforgettable moment in the show?

Maybe the whole scene before Zuko's coronation starts, "Peace" playing in the background, we see friends and family reunited, happy, alive. We witness something few of us could've predicted: the last person we ever thought, who went through and learned so much, is crowned the new Fire Lord. It's such a victorious moment and never leaves me without emotion.

14) Which one is your favourite book?

I have a weird system concerning this. Book 1 was sort of like the start of their journey, the world was slowly being built and introduced to us. Book 2 became much more serious, the characters gained more depth and the stakes began to rise. When I thought it couldn't get any better, I was proven horribly wrong. Book 3 became far more emotional than I ever could've imagined. So it's like my love grew with each book, and I kind of love the last one the most for this reason.

15) Who had the greatest character development in the show?

Everybody developed so much, but I'd definitely say it was Zuko. At first, I didn't really care much about him. Just another villain trying to capture someone for his own personal gain, I figured. But that all changed when I saw his back story in "The Storm". I started to look at him from a completely different angle. I began to understand where he came from, why he was doing this. I saw how much he struggled, how many wrongs he committed. The climax was when he faced his own father and told him: "No! I've learned everything! And I've had to learn it on my own. Growing up, we were taught that the Fire Nation was the greatest civilization in history and somehow, the war was our way of sharing our greatness with the rest of the world. What an amazing lie that was! The people of the world are terrified by the Fire Nation! They don't see our greatness, they hate us! And we deserve it." This is what he learned by spending time as a refugee in the Earth Kingdom, by witnessing firsthand what his nation, what this war was doing to others. And he was determined to set things right by joining Aang and his friends, teaching him firebending and stopping his own homeland from going down this path.

16) What do you love most about Avatar: The Last Airbender?

The story that Bryan and Michael came up with. I have NEVER cried so much, laughed at so many original jokes, heard such gorgeous instrumental music made by Jeremy Zuckerman, the raw emotion behind the voice actors.. every little bit is what makes this story and this series so amazing, fulfilling and perfect.

17) What do you hate most about Avatar: The Last Airbender?

I don't hate anything about the show per se, perhaps more about the way the fandom can act sometimes.

18) With which character do you identify most?

Like I answered in question 2, Katara. Her personality reflects mine the most, we share similar values in life, I love her family (Hakoda and Sokka) because they have such loving relationships with each other (Katara and Hakoda made me emotional several times, and they only had a few scenes together!).

19) Is Avatar: The Last Airbender your favourite cartoon/anime?

Ever since I discovered it, and I think it'll remain as my favourite cartoon for the rest of my life. Nothing can ever impact me as much as Avatar has.

20) Would you want to be the Avatar?

Thinking just how messed up our own world is right now, how my aggressive eastern neighbour has occupied parts of 2 independent countries, how helpless and angry I feel that I can't do anything about it - Y E S. I want to bring peace and balance back to our world, too. And if I had my own loving, supportive partner (like Aang) by my side, I'd do it again in a thousand lifetimes.

21) What's your favourite ship?

I personally ship everything that has been or is currently canon. My OTP is obviously Kataang, though I'm also one of the few friendly multishippers out here. Which means that I don't mind seeing beautiful stuff about Zutara either, for instance. (Seriously, you should check out my tag, there are so many lovely gifsets there, be it romantic or platonic.)

To sum up, thank you once more for tagging me! I'm not gonna tag anyone specific, but if any of you would like to do this, too, then go ahead! It was really fun to reflect back on why I love this show so much.

[nothing-more-than-hot-leaf-juice]

I couldn't really get into Azula, tbh. I mean, she is a Whole Look and I appreciate her lack of chill, but she felt like she needed more dimension.

AIGHT! LOOKS LIKE IT’S TIME TO WRITE SOME MORE AZULA META. Because I’m not about to have one of the most complex antagonists in television history slandered like this.

If you want to talk dimensions, let’s start there. From the basis of her actions, we can characterize Azula as many things: manipulative, ruthless, ambitious, and lacking in empathy. We see her as a military strategist: commanding the drill to go through the wall, conquering Ba Sing Se by staging the coup, and planning the destruction of the Earth Kingdom with Sozin’s Comet. We see her as a master manipulator: convincing Mai and Ty Lee to join her hunt in season 2, convincing Zuko to betray Iroh, lying to Ozai about Zuko killing Aang, and stalling Sokka at the invasion by taunting him about Suki. We see her trying to kill her brother and uncle all throughout season 2 just on her father’s orders, shooting Aang with lightning in the season 2 finale, almost killing Zuko multiple times in season 3, and nearly killing Katara in Sozin’s Comet. 

So from her actions, we can characterize her simply as power-hungry and lacking in empathy, sure, but it’s in her motivations that her dimensions lie. And everything, everything Azula does in this show is to prove to her father that she’s worthy of his favoritism.

We’re introduced to Azula in season 1 indirectly via Zuko and we know some things about their father already. The two main things being the whole ‘burned half of Zuko’s face off and banished him for speaking out of turn and refusing to fight him’ and the whole “[their] father said [Azula] was born lucky” and “[Zuko] was lucky to be born.” At the end of season 1, Ozai calls Zuko “a miserable failure” and we see him about to send this mysterious sister figure to do something about that. We know that Ozai had absolutely no sympathy whatsoever for his son and horrifically, publically abused him over what exactly? Showing weakness. 

That’s what we know from season 1. With Azula’s introduction in season 2, it’s clear that their upbringing was way more messed up than just this one instance. We start to see that there are these cracks in the royal family and the manipulation and callousness goes way beyond Zuko’s banishment. 

From the Zuko and Iroh plot of The Avatar State, there are a couple key moments where themes of favoritism, perfectionism, and jealousy enter. It starts with the three-year anniversary of Zuko’s banishment where he’s sitting in self-loathing just wanting his “father not to think [he’s] worthless,” holding onto Ozai’s approval as the achievable thing that will mean he’s worth something. We see Azula practicing lightning bending (something we have never seen a firebender do on the show before, it is clear that she is incredibly talented) but still berates herself for being ‘one hair out of place’. We see Zuko lash out at Iroh for implying that Ozai might not really want him to come home despite what Azula says, and we know that Iroh genuinely cares about Zuko and wants him to be safe, but Ozai doesn’t. Iroh introduces the concept that “things in [their] family are not always as they seem, but Zuko reduces this to sibling rivalry, and there’s a reason why. Zuko and Azula have been raised under a competition for their entire lives, and for that entire time, Azula was winning. And by this point she’s still winning. She’s ecstatic that she’s the favorite child while Ozai wants to “lock [Zuko] away where he can no longer embarrass him”. By the end of this episode, one thing is clear: Azula and Zuko are competing with each other. Only one of them can be good enough for their father. But while Zuko takes his first step to cut himself off, Azula doesn’t want to stray from this competition that she’s winning.

In Zuko Alone, this favoritism goes deeper. Just like with Ozai, Ursa’s approval and love is conditional, but these are conditions Azula isn’t meeting. She’s not as empathetic or sweet as Zuko and their mother isn’t shown treating her with the same affection as she does with Zuko. It’s not just Ozai favoring Azula over Zuko with that one scene of Ozai smiling when Azula performs her firebending and frowning when Zuko performs his, it’s Ursa favoring Zuko over Azula. It’s Ursa treating Zuko with gentleness and care and only reprimanding Azula for the way that she is.

Despite the fact that she’s obviously getting all her ideas from her father. This mentality of ‘I must do anything for the throne, even throw my own sibling under the bus,’ is all from Ozai. And when Ursa leaves, there’s no one to keep her in check. There’s only one parent to win the affection of and she’s already succeeding because all she has to do is be a better firebender. All she has to do is follow Ozai’s example of callousness and ruthlessness in order to be the favored child. And keep in mind, being ‘the favored child’ under this roof isn’t something petty, it means ‘one of you gets to be the heir and the other might not be allowed to live.’ This episode reveals what’s been going on in Zuko and Azula’s head this whole time. It reveals that they’re both constantly thinking that only one of them is going to be seen as worthy in their father’s eyes, as they were taught to believe that Ozai was more ‘worthy’ than Iroh since Iroh retreated from Ba Sing Se after Lu Ten died. And the other one, the one that wasn’t seen as worthy, that one was ‘disposable.’ And for most of their lives, the ‘disposable’ one was Zuko. 

But while Zuko spends most of the series slowly learning, with Iroh’s help, that the situation shouldn’t have been like this, that parental love and protection shouldn’t have to be conditional, Azula is still stuck in this mentality. And season 2 is full of examples of Azula doing everything in her power to prove herself to Ozai. Her task was to just bring Zuko and Iroh home for imprisonment, but along the way she added ‘capturing the Avatar’ and ‘conquering Ba Sing Se’ as additional tasks for herself. Why? Because those were the things Iroh and Zuko failed at doing. And she needs to prove that she’s better than them, otherwise what’s going to stop Ozai from deciding that she’s the person who he’s going to be disappointed in next? But if she does these things, if she conquers Ba Sing Se, if she finds the Avatar, that means she’ll still be considered useful to him, right? That means she’s the one who “has father’s love,” right? 

Because that’s what Azula strives to be over anything else: useful. She wants to be the person he relies on. The child he believes in. There’s a really good example of this early in season 2 when Azula goes to Omashu to get Mai: 

Azula takes control of the situation. She doesn’t really have anything to do with this city or the fake plague or the hostage trade. This is entirely the governor's responsibility and she’s just there to pick up her friend, but since she’s there, she has to make sure things are in order for her father. So she strips the governor of his power, takes control of the hostage situation to ensure that Bumi doesn’t slip through her fingers, and renames the city ‘New Ozai’ just for good measure. We see Azula as the actual proactive villain for all of season 2 and she would be well within her rights to name the city after herself. But she doesn’t. Because that’s not why she’s doing anything she’s doing. 

The flashback showing where she suggests burning down the Earth Kingdom reveals a lot with her body language. She suggests this by interrupting Zuko, who’s more resistant to the idea to ‘destroy their hope.’ He doesn't agree with Ozai’s idea, but she needs to show that she’s on her father’s side. She’s the one who can be as ruthless and destructive as he is. So she suggests this and looks to Ozai for approval, and once he gives it, that’s when she looks pleased. The actual plan to destroy the Earth Kingdom isn’t what brings her joy at this moment, it’s Ozai’s approval of her suggestion. We didn’t see her clap once his back was turned. This isn’t about the plan itself, it’s about Azula’s ability to be the heir she thinks Ozai wants her to be. 

And it’s in this moment in Sozin’s Comet shows exactly where Azula’s been coming from this whole time: 

This whole time, it hasn’t been about the destruction. It hasn’t been about what she wants. It’s been about being the favored child. It’s about being better than Zuko. In Azula’s eyes, she’s done everything right. She’s master lightning. She wasn’t the traitor like her brother or uncle. She conquered Ba Sing Se. She showed her father that she was on board with the destruction of the Earth Kingdom and proved her loyalty. She did everything right. But there’s a part of her that was waiting for this shoe to drop for years, ever since she watched her brother get his face burned off for not meeting Ozai’s standards. And she sure as hell remembers that all throughout the series and it shows: she can’t afford to be imperfect because she knows the consequences if she’s not. 

But in this moment, her fear shows. Her fear of not being good enough. The fear of being imperfect, disposable. She’s been terrified of this moment her whole life and has done everything to delay it. This moment: where Ozai casts her aside, where she isn’t good enough to come with him in her eyes. There’s no one left but her: no Iroh, no Zuko, no Ursa. Everyone else left and there’s no one else to compete with. And she’s left alone with this meaningless position of Firelord now that Ozai’s about to declare himself ‘Phoenix King’ and she clings onto that position because it’s her last chance to prove herself after this rejection. 

She goes off the deep end because she’s all alone. She’s snipped out anyone who was imperfect. She cut off her friends once they betrayed her. Azula isolated herself on the throne and demanded perfection because that’s what she saw her father do. Family wasn’t important to him. Loyalty and perfection were. So that’s the example she follows but it’s lonely and terrifying, so she loses herself. All her fears about not being good enough come back up after Ozai leaves her behind. That’s why she mentions Mai and Ty Lee. That’s why she sees Ursa. These are the people who didn’t choose her, and now that her father has left her behind and she hasn’t met his standards for the first time in her life, all those vulnerabilities and insecurities come to the surface. The thing Azula fears most over anything else is rejection, which is why she’s obsessed with perfection. Because she’s been taught that if she’s good enough: if she perfects her firebending technique, if people fear and respect her, and if people choose her, then that means she’s not disposable.

And at the end, she’s the one who challenges Zuko to an Agni Kai. To prove one last time that she is worthy. That she was worthy all along and that her father was right to choose her to be Firelord. 

And there’s an interesting parallel to consider here. The first time we ever see Azula is at Zuko’s Agni Kai with Ozai in the season 1 flashback, and at that one she’s smiling at her brother getting punished because it signifies to her that she won. Ozai picked her. Zuko was the disposable one. And in the end she wants that to still be true and finds that it’s not. In the end she loses and she doesn’t know what to do with herself now that she’s the one cast aside. 

And that’s the tragedy of Azula, really. This entire time she was conditioned to think that her value and the value of the people around her rested in perfection and she spent the entire series trying to prove herself. She was convinced that love was something that needed to be earned and that if she didn’t get results, if she didn’t win, then she didn’t deserve it. 

And that’s just a small piece of her character if we’re being honest. This doesn’t get into the details of how Ursa’s treatment shaped her, how her relationship with Zuko was ruined by their parents, how her bending is a reflection of her mental state, or how he relationship with Mai and Ty Lee reflects her view of herself and others. Azula is one of the most complex villains in television history not only because she has a rich backstory, interesting motivations, or unique persona, but because underneath everything, she’s just a teenage girl who doesn’t wants her dad’s approval and is so deeply terrified of being cast aside. She may be ruthless and she may lack empathy, but those traits stem from deeply rooted damage and vulnerability. 

(For some more Azula meta I did a deep dive into how The Beach foreshadows her breakdown and reveals her vulnerabilities and here where I talked about how she and Zuko were pitted against each other and had their relationship damaged by parental favoritism.)

[nothing-more-than-hot-leaf-juice]

Moment that hurt the most.

This moment: 

{Image: Iroh laying on his back after getting shot by Azula and Zuko kneeling down next to him with his wrists covering his eyes as he bows his head.}

(The Chase, Book 2)

Because the fact that Iroh is hurt by itself is hard enough, but it’s the context that makes it more heartbreaking.

Up until this point, we’ve seen how much of a positive influence Iroh is on Zuko. He’s been the only one there for Zuko at all times. He’s the one who’s protected Zuko and given him unconditional love. And Zuko’s been angry and difficult, we’ve seen that. And in most series where there’s a clear villain, you’d expect it to be framed like ‘Iroh is way too nice to Zuko, who is a huge asshole.’ But it isn’t. Instead, as we get the context of Zuko’s banishment and as we see how Iroh treats Zuko in season 1, Iroh and Zuko’s relationship becomes clear to us as full of unconditional love, but with barriers that make it difficult for them to communicate that love. Through the series, we see those barriers get knocked down. 

In the first episodes, we see Zuko yell at Iroh and generally act like a brat, but it’s also clear that Iroh is the one person that Zuko is comfortable around. Iroh’s the one person who vouches for Zuko and is genuinely rooting for this kid. But it’s clear that he’s not rooting for Zuko to capture the Avatar necessarily, instead, he’s rooting for Zuko to stop hating himself and to stop endangering his own life.

But the thing is, Zuko doesn’t know how to accept it. At all. He’s convinced himself that he doesn’t deserve Iroh’s unconditional love. Zuko was conditioned by his father to believe that in order to be loved, he had to be worthy. 

Zuko is consistently surprised whenever Iroh is proud of him or whenever Iroh shows up to protect him. In The Southern Air Temple, when Iroh protects Zuko from Zhao’s illegal hit after the Agni Kai ended and said “disgraceful, even in exile my nephew is more honorable than you”. Zuko’s still surprised that after Zhao did an objectively dishonorable thing after the match, Iroh openly chose Zuko’s side and stood up for him.

“Did you really mean that Uncle?” 

Zuko’s used to people pushing him away. He’s used to having to prove his worth. He’s used to there being a bar for him to have to reach and then when he finally does, the bar just gets moved up higher. Iroh doesn’t have a bar for Zuko. He doesn’t want Zuko to improve himself to meet a standard, rather, he wants Zuko to improve himself in order to be happy and to find self-realization. 

There’s the more obvious moment at the end of season 1 with the “ever since I lost my son, I think of you as my own”. 

“You don’t have to say it, Uncle” 

This scene has already been talked about before, but let’s look at it again. Iroh tells Zuko that he needs to be safe when he goes down to the water and says “ever since I lost my son... I think of you as my own.” This is the first time in the series it’s mentioned that Iroh had a son. That detail itself gives us more insight into Iroh’s motivations. We can look at his actions in the context of ‘he couldn’t protect Lu Ten, so he’s going to do everything in his power to keep Zuko safe’. But it’s also clear that Iroh doesn’t expect or want Zuko to be Lu Ten. It is clear, and it has been clear for the entirety of season one, that Iroh unconditionally loves Zuko. Iroh’s followed Zuko across the world, accepted him for his faults while still wanting him to improve, and is the only person we’ve seen show genuine affection for him. 

This scene confirms that unconditional love, but it also reveals that Zuko doesn’t know how to accept it. We already know that Zuko cares about Iroh (mainly from the episode where Zuko forgoes chasing Aang in favor of rescuing Iroh from the earthbenders, which is one of the first truly selfless acts we see Zuko do), but this scene reveals that the reason Zuko pushes away from Iroh isn’t that he doesn’t want his Uncle’s love, but because Zuko thinks he doesn’t deserve it. Zuko says “you don’t have to say it” because he thinks that it’s something that’s harder for Iroh to say rather than something hard for him to hear. Iroh believes it. He loves Zuko and wants him to be safe, but Zuko doesn’t think Iroh has a reason to and can’t wrap his head around it. So he bows as a sign of respect and tells Iroh that they’ll meet again “after [he] finds the Avatar” because Zuko’s convinced that in order to earn love, he has to prove himself. Finding the Avatar is the task he was dealt to earn love, so he focuses on that when met with affection. Iroh hugs him and Zuko just doesn’t understand why. He doesn’t think he’s earned it. 

In season 2, the first episode dives a little deeper into this block that Zuko has. When Azula lies to them about Ozai wanting Zuko back, Iroh is able to look at the situation objectively whereas Zuko can only focus on the ‘my father doesn’t think I’m worthless after all’ smoke and mirrors. Iroh sees the situation for what it is: Ozai was needlessly cruel to Zuko and if Zuko returns, that’s what he’s going to be met with. For season 1, Iroh went along with Zuko on his Avatar hunt to make sure he didn’t make stupid, life-threatening decisions and to emotionally support him, but capturing the Avatar was never Iroh’s goal. He didn’t want Zuko to return to the father that scarred him and banished him for not wanting to fight. 

So when Zuko is going to take Azula’s offer to return home, Iroh’s protective instincts kick in, but he has to be explicit about it. He has to say the hard truth in order to keep his kid safe.  

“Father’s realized how important family is to him. He cares about me.” 

“I care about you! I mean, if Ozai wants you back, well, I think it might not be for the reasons you imagine.” 

Iroh all but explicitly says “Zuko, Ozai mistreated you and doesn’t care about you. If you return, he’s going to hurt you.” But he has to say it, because after three years Zuko still doesn’t want to believe it and is now making a decision that could endanger his life. 

And Zuko still rejects this. He lashes out and insults Iroh, accusing him of being jealous of his more successful younger brother. Zuko tells Iroh “you don’t know what my father thinks of me. You don’t know anything.” He’s still holding onto the notion that Ozai’s ‘love’ is something he can win, one way or another. Iroh is the one to recognize the fault in that logic and all he can do it be by Zuko’s side to protect him when shit goes down (which it does). 

When the fact that Ozai doesn’t care about Zuko becomes harder to ignore after Zuko finds out that Azula was going to take them as prisoners and his “father considers [him] a miserable failure”, he’s still not ready to accept unconditional love. That fact becomes clear in The Swamp and Avatar Day. 

“Do you like your new tea set?” 

The scene where Zuko gets mad about begging escalates when Iroh is publically humiliated in order to get them a gold piece. Zuko can’t firebend and the man’s dual swords are taunting him. Those are his weapons and he’s helpless to do anything for Iroh in this situation. Iroh dances as the man swipes knives at his feet and all Zuko can do is watch. What he was raised on was the mentality that he had to prove his parental figures his worth. Zuko was convinced that Iroh providing for him wasn’t how it should be and hates the situation. So he overcompensates: he goes on a crime spree and doesn’t just steal food, he steals gold in order to buy Iroh a fancy tea set. 

Iroh tells Zuko that he doesn’t need things to be happy and Zuko gets stuck. He doesn't see a clear way to prove his worth to Iroh anymore and he still doesn’t know how to just accept love without working for it. So he leaves. Zuko decides that “they no longer have anything to gain by traveling together” not because he doesn’t want to be with his Uncle, but because Zuko no longer sees how he is useful to Iroh. Zuko would rather be alone than be a burden, emotionally or otherwise. 

And in The Chase, we find out that Iroh has been following Zuko this whole time. Iroh knows that Zuko needs space to figure himself out, but is always going to be there to keep him physically safe. 

Despite the fact that he left Iroh, despite everything, Iroh was still there. Zuko didn’t really have time to grasp this fact, but Iroh showing up when he got knocked out showed Zuko that yes, this love is unconditional. Iroh’s just going to be there for him and that’s that. Zuko isn’t past the ‘love must be earned’ mentality, but this gesture means so much to him after he felt alone and directionless for weeks. 

Then Iroh gets shot by Azula as he’s standing right next to Zuko. 

And what’s going through Zuko’s head right now is something along these lines:

He knows his Uncle was there to protect him even when Zuko left 

He’s convinced himself that he’s been a burden on his Uncle, just like his dad treated him as 

He didn’t have time to thank Iroh for being there anyway 

Iroh got hit because he followed Zuko and acted as his protector

Zuko wasn’t able to protect Iroh 

So now this person, the one person who was there for him and who always believed in him despite everything is hurt and for all he knows, might not survive, is on the ground and unconscious because Zuko couldn’t protect his Uncle the way his Uncle protected him. And Zuko regrets everything at this moment. He regrets the fact that he left. He regrets not taking Iroh’s advice. He regrets not being a more skilled firebending. He regrets not being able to give back what Iroh gave him in terms of protection. 

And he’s convinced that he’s failed his Uncle. He looks at this situation and is terrified that Iroh won’t be okay, but he’s also convinced that it was his fault. Zuko thinks that because Iroh decided to side with him from the beginning, his life has been ruined. If Iroh had stayed in the Fire Nation instead of gone with Zuko on his banishment, Iroh wouldn't have spent years at sea, he wouldn’t have been branded a traitor, he wouldn’t be on the run, he wouldn’t have had to beg for coins on the street, and he wouldn’t have been shot in the chest by Azula. 

Zuko can’t wrap his head around why Iroh decided to go with him. After all, he’s the banished and disgraceful ex-prince. He’s scarred and untalented and he spends years desperately trying to prove that he’s worth something. Zuko’s been conditioned to think that in order to be worth anyone’s time or affection, he has to prove himself. He has to be useful. And to be the reason Iroh is hurt (which he isn’t but that’s what he thinks is the case), that just means he has to prove himself further. 

And for the rest of the season, he doesn’t leave Iroh’s side. He knows what it feels like to almost lose his Uncle and can’t risk that again. He takes Iroh’s advice and goes with him to Ba Sing Se. He takes care of Iroh when he’s unconscious, makes him tea, patiently learns lighting redirection (there’s a clear difference in how Zuko listens to Iroh as a teacher from the first episode of season 1 to Bitter Work), guards Iroh from the Rough Rhinos, and tries his best to stay quiet serving tea. 

This moment in The Chase is such a pivotal moment for Zuko. For the first half of the series, Iroh has been the parental figure Zuko needed and deserved, but Zuko didn’t understand that. In the moment where he almost loses Iroh, something clicks. Zuko starts to understand what was missing before. He starts to accept that this relationship is something he needs in his life. Zuko realizes that Iroh has been there and he’s going to keep being there and that’s something he isn’t ready to lose. There’s so much shame in the idea that Iroh would be hurt for him and he spends the rest of the season trying to make it up. 

And we know that it ends up not being enough to break Zuko away from wanting Ozai’s approval, but this moment reveals just how fractured Zuko’s self-image is, just how much he needs Iroh, and just how much he feels he doesn’t deserve unconditional love. This moment is pure vulnerability as the one person who stuck by Zuko’s side through injury and banishment is hurt. 

Zuko is convinced that it’s his fault and if Iroh hadn’t decided to be by his side, this wouldn’t have happened. 

[nothing-more-than-hot-leaf-juice]

Zutara. My otp since I first watched as a 10 year old in 2005. Hopefully you'll be kind to them 😉 I'm convinced they'll be cannon in the live action 😅

Alright... *starts digging grave*, I think Katara and Zuko have a wonderful platonic relationship and for them to have a romantic relationship would (1) undermine Zuko’s redemption arc and (2) undermine the found family aspect of their friendship. I don’t have an issue with anyone who ships Zutara and I do not engage in shipping drama, but I think their platonic relationship is too damn important to favor a romantic relationship I don't really think has chemistry. 

Personally, I have never gotten romantic vibes from them like... at all? I think the progression of their friendship was important in terms of the show’s themes of forgiving those who deserve it and finding support in people you least expect, but I just don’t get chemistry from them. I’ve always been a Kataang fan but how I feel about Zutara has nothing to do with that. Avatar is one of those shows where I would have been totally fine with it ending with no romantic pairings because the found family aspect of it is so much more powerful. 

If anyone has spent 5 seconds on my blog, you know that Zuko is my favorite character and I think he deserves nothing but love and support after all the shit he went through. But a big aspect of why I care about him as a character is that he put the work in to make amends. He didn’t just show up one day saying “I’ve seen the error of my ways, sorry for all the stuff I did, I’m good now” and that was that. He had to work for forgiveness and he did it because he realized the fire nation was wrong, his father was wrong, and he was wrong. His decision to switch sides had nothing to do with any connection with the gaang because he didn’t really know them. His decision to switch sides stemmed from 3 very important things: 

(1) He felt guilty not for betraying Aang and Katara in Ba Sing Se, but Iroh. He realized his uncle was the person who had given him unconditional love while Azula and Ozai’s “love” for him was entirely dependent on his ability to provide them results. From this guilt, he was able to realize that his uncle had made the right decision in siding with the Avatar and more importantly, that Ozai was wrong and that all the abuse he endured under him was undeserved. 

(2) His experiences in the Earth Kingdom as a refugee. This post explains it really well, but Zuko’s realization that everything he’s believed about the Fire Nation has been wrong is rooted in his moment of empathy with Song and her matching burn scar, his empathy with Lee who lost his brother like Zuko lost Lu Ten, his empathy with Jet who lost his way going to extremes for a cause, and, yes, his empathy with Katara who’s mother was taken from her by the Fire Nation like his was. The reason he switches sides is because after all of those experiences, he can no longer be callous or unfeeling towards the Earth Kingdom like his father or sister. The people of the Earth Kingdom either empathized with him for the pain he went through and appreciated him for his desire to help the helpless (Song, Lee, Jet) or feared and hated him for being part of a country that caused their suffering (Lee, Lee’s mom, Jet, Katara). Throughout season 2, Zuko realized the extent of what the war meant for the other side. 

(3) The realization of the extents his father would go to and the truth about Ozai’s amorality. This point is kind of just the culmination of everything in the last two points, but all that set up comes to fruition when Zuko attends the war meeting where Ozai decides to use Sozin’s Comet to commit genocide. By this point he’s racked with guilt over what he did to Iroh, he’s empathized with people who have suffered and is coming to terms with the fact that it’s not only the people of the earth kingdom that have unnecessarily suffered because of Ozai, but him as well. In that meeting, he expresses adoration for the Earth Kingdom being proud and strong and Ozai’s response is to burn it to the ground. It’s the same treatment he gave Zuko at the Agni Kai when he stuck to his morals and refused to fight and was met with abject cruelty. At that meeting, Zuko realizes that his father is wrong and that he was always wrong. He realizes that millions of people will suffer at the hands of this man who is so incredibly wrong and lacking in empathy. 

SO, keeping all that in mind. His redemption arc doesn’t stop when he switches sides, it keeps going as he makes individual amends with Aang, Sokka, and Katara. It keeps going as he learns from the dragons, as he chooses what he believes in over his girlfriend, as he risks his life to protect the gaang from Azula, and as he tries to help Aang, Sokka, and Katara find emotional closure in different aspects. He helps Aang overcome his fear of firebending. He helps Sokka regain his honor. And he helps Katara address her grief regarding her mother’s death. These four episodes are some of the best in the series because it’s not just Zuko working to make amends because he wants them to trust him, but it’s him empathizing with their trauma, their guilt, and their fear of failure because he’s been there. 

Alright, that’s a whole essay regarding why Zuko’s redemption arc works, now what does this have to do with Zutara? Here’s the deal: if any aspect of Zuko’s decisions for his redemption were influenced by romantic attraction to Katara, it would undermine the meaning of his choices for him. He made the choices to be better because he empathized with a nation of people who needlessly suffered. He made the choices to be better because he learned to cut himself off from the need to please his abusive father and accept the unconditional love of his uncle. His choice to help Katara find her mother’s murderer stemmed from empathy and his desire to be better than the people who hurt him and hurt others. The reason Katara’s resentment towards him hurt him so much was because he was trying so hard to be better than the people that were feared and hated. Katara treated him like Lee’s mom and Jet did when they realized he was a firebender (that being said, Katara was justified since Zuko’s decision to side with Azula resulted in the fall of Ba Sing Se and nearly resulted in Aang’s death), and he didn’t want to be that person. He didn’t want to be hated or feared anymore and he was willing to do anything to move past being viewed like that. So Katara’s decision to finally forgive him? It’s the point where she realizes he’s able to empathize with her over his mother’s death where her mother’s killer could not. She realized that he was different and had changed because he put the work in. And that’s huge for his redemption, not for any kind of forming relationship because that’s not the point. 

Now, concerning the whole found-family aspect I love so much? Zutara as a romantic pairing would undermine the beauty of Zuko’s ability to find a loving, supportive group of people that he was missing his entire life. Katara does not work as a romantic partner for Zuko because she works as his replacement sister. The fact is that Zuko’s actual family experience was founded on fear and not love, but the idea of “usefulness”. Zuko and Azula were only valued by Ozai so much as they were useful to him, which is why he favored (not loved) Azula, she was useful to him and Zuko wasn’t until he “slayed the Avatar”. Iroh (and Ursa for a time) was the only person who showed him unconditional love and support, but that wasn’t enough to snap him out of the need to please Ozai. Zuko rooted his entire self worth in what his family thought of him and engaged in very self-destructive behavior throughout season 1 to prove himself because he “didn’t want [his] father to think [he was] worthless”. Even throughout season 3, he still thinks that his uncle’s love for him is conditional (”my uncle hates me I I know it”) until he’s proven otherwise because that’s what he’s been taught. So him joining the gaang, that’s the first time in his life he’s really met with the concept of people liking him for himself, not for his ability to be useful (his family, Jet) or because they think he’s someone he’s not (Song, Lee, Jin). He’s met with friendship: people making fun of him in a playful way instead of tearing down his insecurities and vulnerabilities (”mind if I watch you too jerks do your jerkbending?” “so all we need to do is make Zuko angry, that should be easy enough”, “look, it’s baby Zuko!”, “actually I think [the play portrayal] is pretty spot-on”), people trying to help him fix his problems (”you need to go back to the original source”) instead of making him feel weak for not being able to solve those problems in the first place, and showing him express appreciation and encouragement (”you’re pretty smart”, “to Zuko, who knew after all the times he tried to snuff us out, today he’d be our hero”, “I’m going with Zuko!”). And that’s so. Damn. Important for his ability to heal after how he was treated for his entire life. He’s introduced to the idea that people want him to be around and they want to include him in their circle for being him. Up until the finale, he doesn’t know if he’ll be able to reconcile with Iroh or if Iroh will accept his forgiveness, but these people have given him a home in their group and he’s not afraid or insecure around a group of people for the first time in his life. 

And that’s why Katara has to be the one to defeat Azula: because Azula couldn’t be the sister Zuko had and Katara could be. It’s a tragedy that Zuko and Azula were driven apart by Ozai pitting them against each other, the corruption of firebending throughout the ages so it’s regarded for its power rather than its energy, and Azula’s own insecurities and fears of losing power because, like Zuko once did, she only considers herself to be worth anything so long as she’s better than him. The abuse he endured had an effect on her to because so long as she saw that Ozai’s “love” for Zuko was conditional, that meant that his “love” for her was conditional as well (”you can’t treat me like Zuko!”). Zuko and Azula could never support each other and they could never trust each other in the way that Sokka and Katara could. They wouldn’t sacrifice anything for each other because they were conditioned to survive, to leave behind the lesser sibling in order to get ahead. But at the Agni Kai, Zuko jumps in front of the lighting for Katara because unlike Azula, she has supported him since she forgave him and is there to back him up. She thinks he can be Firelord and she thought his uncle could forgive him in a way that Azula just never could. And that’s why Katara has to be the one to defeat Azula. Not because of any romantic attraction for Zuko, but because he’s protected Aang and Sokka and her and Toph and their little found family. It’s because he’s one of them. So in that moment where Azula is defeated, screaming and sobbing because she’s lost and that means that she’s the weaker sibling, she’s gone and it’s tragic. Zuko looks upon her and he wishes it didn’t have to be like this, but it is and it’s tragic. It didn’t have to be how it was but it did and it was awful and Azula is left broken, hating her brother with murderous fury. But he’s not alone.

He has a new sister who will protect him and fight for him when he’s lost his own. 

(addition: I want to make it clear that this does not mean I think Azula is irredeemable. Her actions and outlook are 100% a product of Ozai’s abuse, as I explained. I do not think that’s she’s beyond redemption, but by the finale she was still a villain and her goal was still to kill her brother so she could be Firelord. That’s not to say that she couldn’t have eventually healed and been able to reconcile with him, but by the final Agni Kai that’s not where their relationship was. The fact that she and Zuko had a toxic relationship was not her fault, but they still had a toxic relationship built on distrust and competition where Zuko and Katara’s friendship was built on support and protection. I am entirely sympathetic towards Azula, but just because she was redeemable doesn’t mean she was redeemed and just because there was potential for her and Zuko to eventually have a better relationship doesn’t mean that they did by the end of the series.)