#and a doctor ACTUALLY said he's concerned about my (an overweight person's) weight loss!!

[threadmonster]

I got surprise money back from when I had my wisdom teeth removed???? Hell yeah

[winter-soldier-vibes]

Running on empty (Bucky x reader)

Running on empty

Bucky x anorexic reader

Word count: 1810

Warnings: lots of eating disorder talk/behaviors, self hatred

Summary: Reader relapses in their eating disorder, and the team has a bad feeling about what’s going on. Once they figure it out, Bucky comes to find you

-----------------------

When you were younger you were always an overweight kid. And everyone made sure you knew that they knew. Your peers always made fun of you for being fat. Your family always talked about weight loss techniques, some even going so far as surgeries. And your doctor was the worst… they would always make you feel guilty about it. You would go in for an injury and she would blame your weight, saying you’d be the youngest person they’d ever seen to have organ failure due to their weight. 

You didn’t let it bother you for the longest time. You somehow found a way to be confident in yourself, keep your head up, and not let the comments get to you. Your parents claimed they didn't have to worry about you because you were the most confident person they knew.

But one day it all caught up to you.

You were transitioning into college and you were feeling really stressed. Years of emotional torment were really taking their toll on you, and as much as you put on the same brave face for everyone, you weren’t fooling yourself anymore. You absolutely hate your appearance. And so, you decided to start dieting and exercising.

3 months in and you stopped eating almost entirely

4 months in and people started to notice

9 months in and you were hospitalized with a feeding tube because you were dangerously underweight.

Years later and you were still dancing between the hospital and the real world, unable to stop the addiction you had with starving yourself.

Eventually, you had gotten it under control and went into remission. You went on to work for S.H.I.E.L.D. and got to work with the Avengers often. You had advanced knowledge that proved useful to the team on missions so you often trained with them and accompanied them on missions. You were closer with them than you were with your actual family. You felt pretty happy.

Until you didn’t

You had noticed little flare ups here and there. If a mission didn’t go well you would find yourself training in the gym for hours at a time or fasting for a day or two. After one of Tony’s extravagant parties you often found yourself drinking so much that you would vomit or doing it yourself. And just looking at Natasha could cause you to tear up because you felt inadequate. 

It bothered you, it really did. You kept telling yourself that it was fine and it was normal to do these things, but you knew deep down that it wasn’t. But you just kept trying to be your normal self. 

But one day a flip just switched.

What the trigger was, you weren’t quite sure. Maybe it was just some jealousy over Natasha again. Maybe it was a mission gone wrong. Or maybe you had just stared at yourself for a little too long in the mirror getting ready, but you decided you’d had enough. You didn’t eat that day, and by the time you went to bed you knew that this wasn’t a one day type of thing. But you also knew that you would feel better if you lost a few pounds.

Over the next few days, you made excuses to miss meals with the team, claiming you had some work or training to do, or that you had already eaten. And sure, you’d get a few cocked eyebrows but they’d drop it pretty quickly. After a few weeks though, everyone started getting concerned for you.

“Does she, like, not want to be around us anymore?” Sam asked

“I don’t know what’s been going on, but (Y/N) has been acting so distant for the past few weeks. I don’t like it” Steve said, worry etched on his face. 

The team kept sharing their concerns, but Bucky stared off, wheels turning in his head trying to piece things together.

“When was the last time we saw her eat?” he asked quietly, almost to himself. 

Everyone fell silent, hearing him speak but not knowing what he said. “What did you say Buck?” Steve questioned

“Bucky looked around the table at his friends. “She always disappears around meals and I haven't actually seen her eat since before she became so distant. When was the last time anyone saw her eat?”

Everyone looked down, trying to figure it out. Realizing they all had the same answer, they began showing different knee jerk emotions. 

Tony was baffled

Peter, Thor, and Natasha were confused

Sam and Clint were saddened

Steve was concerned

And Bucky was terrified. 

Bucky kept to himself, but he had started to develop feelings for you a few weeks after the two of you had met. Despite his efforts, most of the team knew and would sometimes tease him for it when you weren’t in the room. So to say he was scared right now was a big understatement. 

He decided to go looking for you to talk to you about all of this, hoping that you were in truth, just busy and that he was wrong. Of course your hospitalizations and diagnosis were in your files, but no one had ever thought to look through them. He started in the one place he seemed to always see you - the gym.

And sure enough, you were there, running on the treadmill with sweat pouring down your face. He stared at you through the glass for a few moments, worrying thoughts running rampant though his mind. He entered the gym and you saw him, and sent him a smile since you couldn’t say anything due to being out of breath. 

He smiled back softly as he walked up to you. “Hey, can we talk for a minute?”

You sighed and turned off the treadmill. You were fine with talking, you were just annoyed that he had interrupted your 7 mile run. “Sure, Buck, what’s up?” you asked as you grabbed your towel and water

He looked down and took a breath before looking back and asking “Are you okay?”

You chuckled and said “Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” You began to sip your water.

He shifted his weight and ran a nervous hand through his dark hair. He took in your frame. It was smaller than he remembered. Really being able to look at you, he saw how pale you were and how your eyes were sunken in. He pulled his eyebrows together in concern, asking “When was the last time you actually ate?”

You nearly choked your water. Surely he couldn’t have caught on.

He didn’t go through your files did he?

You hadn’t even lost that much yet!

You were still so fat.

Surely this couldn’t be happening. Not yet.

What do I tell-

“(Y/N)?”

You realize that you had been staring at him but hadn’t actually said anything, and your water was spilt all over the floor. You had dropped it. “Shit... uhh…” you begin, clearly flustered. “What do you mean Barnes?”

“Okay, you only call me Barnes when you’re nervous and you’re paler than when I came in, which means something is clearly wrong. (Y/N), really, when was the last time you ate?”

“Earlier today at some point? I don’t know…” you say weakly. You never had been able to lie to Bucky to his face.

Bucky sighed stepping closer. “You know you can tell me anything, don’t you?”

You look away because if you looked at him any longer you might break, and you couldn’t do that. No, you weren’t sick enough yet, you had to be strong. 

“Look, Bucky, I’m all good, really I am. So if that’s all, I’m just going to get back to my running…” you turned back to the treadmill when you felt metal clasp around your arm. Bucky noticed how much smaller it felt around his hand and swallowed thickly. You turned around, tears of desperation forming in your eyes.

“Doll, don’t take this the wrong way, but you look awful.” When you looked clearly offended, he began to backtrack. “I don’t mean that in a rude way or however you may try to take it at all. What I mean is that you’re pale. Your eyes are sunken in. you look so frail, and I’m sorry it’s just...I’m really worried about you.”

You looked down, and tears spilled over your eyes and onto the floor. “4 days,” you said quietly.

“4 days what?” Bucky questioned. 

“You looked him in the eyes, tears still falling. “4 days since I’ve eaten anything. A week since I’ve kept something down. A month since my last actual meal.”

Now it was Bucky’s turn for his face to go white. After a few seconds he removes his hand from your arm to envelop you in a hug. His body towered over you and you feel so small in his arms that he’s truly afraid he may hurt you if he holds you too tightly. 

“What brought this on?” he asks after a minute or so. 

You shrug weakly. “I don’t know… probably something stupid. It always happens that way.” when you feel Bucky stiffen slightly, you add “Yeah, this all, uh….it's happened before a few times.” you sniffle. “Before i came here, that is. I don’t know why it happened this time. It’s just that everyone is so perfect and then I’m me so… yeah.

Bucky pulls back to look you in the eye and brush back some hair from your face. “I don’t know why you feel inadequate (Y/N). Everyone here loves you so much. And all of us, perfect? I mean do you remember all those things I did? We all have something dark about us, and it’s okay that you do too. But it’s not okay to hurt yourself like this, doll. I’m so sorry you’re going through all of this. But i’m here to help you.”

You snorted. “Why would you want to help me Buck?” you ask, voice cracking.

He took another breath and wiped the tears from your eyes. “Because I care about you (Y/N). A lot of people do. And I’ve been wanting to say this for a while, but (Y/N), I really like you. A lot. And I will do anything I can to help you.

Your gaze drops. “You’re just saying that…”

He lifts your chin to look at you again. He shakes his head. “No, (Y/N), I’m not. I really do like you.”

You look at him searching his face for any indication of a lie but there is none, and all you find is concern and...could that actually be a little bit of love? You move to hug him again. “Thank you, Bucky.” you say. 

“Of course, (Y/N), anytime. He rubs your back. “I’m with you till the end of the line.”

[thisclockworkheart]

TW for lots of fatphobia and weight loss talk, but I have some thoughts that just won’t leave me alone. This is long.

More so observations about my interactions with doctors (as a Pt) after a moderate amount of weight loss. Two interactions on opposite ends of the spectrum have taught me one thing:

You can’t win for losing. 

The first interaction is with my favorite doctor. This is the guy that’s literally saved my life multiple times, and the first person to figure out some my rather unusual issues. He’s always blunt with me, which I’ve always appreciated. He’s never been one to pretend that weight loss would cure my issues, but he wasted no time in telling me that it would help control some of the symptoms.

But he waited until I asked the question first. 

At first he was interested in a general trend: up or down? After a while he gave me a simple goal: lose 20 pounds by the time I saw him next. The next time I saw him, I’d actually lost 30 pounds, and I think it made his day.

But there was one thing that look me aback a little: he assumed that since I had done so well with my weight loss, that all of my other symptoms were under control. Think about that for a second. So many of us are told that all of our symptoms will get better when we lose weight, that we’re ignored when we’re fat. We assume that if symptoms persist once we’ve lost weight they’ll take us seriously. But what if they just look at us like we’re crazy when we tell them that weight loss didn’t make us feel better?

At the same time I couldn’t bear to burst his bubble. I mean he literally showed me off to some of the staff that visit declaring how well I was doing. He’d paid attention to other issues, and I’ve had other issues since that visit that they’ve been very responsive to, but I was a little surprised by the whole thing.

_______

The other doctor is one I see because he’s literally the only specialist of his type in town. He was outwardly fatphobic as fuck, but adequate at what he did so I dealt with it.

He would ask me the following questions about my health, even though they had nothing to do with his specialty and he had never run any tests relating to them:

Every time without fail: “How is your diabetes?” I’m not diabetic. “How is your pre diabetes?” I’m not pre diabetic. “How is your insulin resistance?” My last NON fasting blood sugar was literally 79. “Have you looked into gastric bypass surgery?” My BMI does not meet the minimum criteria. “How is your high blood pressure?” I have low blood pressure.

 I put up with it, and eventually he’d get back to the topic I was actually there to see him about. 

Mind you, I’d between my first and second visit I’d lost 20 pounds. 

Which brings me to my latest visit. Between my second to last and most recent visit I’d lost an additional 23 pounds. (That’s 43 pounds total for anyone keeping track) My blood pressure was 94/48. The nurse was actually concerned about me. 

When the doctor came in, it was like I was seeing a totally different provider. He listened to me, he was attentive. He took my symptoms at face value, and offered treatment. He didn’t bring up any of his usual baseless questions. In fact he didn’t bring up weight at all. I mean great, but a little disturbing as well. This is how I should have been treated all along.

It left me a little perturbed, until I got my care summary a few days later. My vitals were at the top, with BMI at the top line: 30.2. Obviously still quite heavy, but also a drastic improvement. For the first time in years I have a BMI that’s nearly in the overweight range, and I’m nowhere near done losing weight yet.

Then I see the first thing on my problem list:  E66.01: Morbid (severe) obesity due to excess calories.

For those not in the know, that’s a diagnostic code for a BMI of 40 or higher. Which I have never been, not even at my highest weight. He then went on to say that I have been non compliant with weight loss despite extensive counselling.

Reminder: He never once brought up weight in any way during the visit. My current BMI is 30.2, which is noted on this very same note. That’s 9.8 points below the minimum BMI needed to be accurate for that diagnosis. I HAVE LOST 43 POUNDS IN THE LAST YEAR. 

But, as an individual I was treated much better, at least to my face.

_____

I know I need to let go of these things, but they keep rattling around in my head.  I know there are SO many people out there that are bigger than I am and don’t have the knowledge and experience I do in navigating the healthcare minefield- as a patient and a professional. 

So like I said earlier, there’s only one conclusion I’ve been able to come up with:

You literally cannot win for losing.

[poignantennui]

Are there cons to becoming vegan?

Hello there, fellow humans.

I am seriously considering the idea of becoming vegan, and I have some questions, so I would greatly appreciate it, if you could give me some advice or clarify some things.

Mostly my questions are about physical consequences of this lifestyle, and ingredients (animal by-products).

Why am I doing this? Well, I love chicken. Love it. My only default order at any new food place I go is whatever chicken option they have.

Even so, my first reason to go vegan is a conscious decision not to harm animals. I dont want any (more) chicken or pigs or goats to suffer and die because of my choices.

Confession: I used to think that veganism is very extreme, not eating eggs and milk, and though that vegetarian diet must be the most rational... Until (like, this week) I learned about the milk industry, that they dont let the calves drink their own moms' milk! How sick is that! Although, I foresee I will struggle with it, as I am a huge coffee with cream drinker, and I used to drink it with almond or coconut milk, untill I tried cream again, and well, I like it much better. Possible consequences for health are a major concern. One of my colleagues used not to eat meat ( along time ago, I learned about it post-factum) and she had problems with anemia, very low levels of iron, doctor ordered her to start eating meat, and it took her months and months to recover. And, you know, throwaway jokes on TV and movies like "I ate a burger last week and now i am not cold all the time anymore" (this was in the last season of Community) - is there truth in this? Second - I heard that there are benefits like skin improves and clears, also weight loss. My skin is not horrible, I manage it with skincare and regular visits to cosmetologist. Weightless would also be wonderful, as I am really overweight and so tired of it. When I only started hearing people's experiences after going vegan, it was all so positive, like the skin cleared in a matter of a week, and it helped with rapid weight loss. Although those are not my primary goals, but they would be nice. But, quite recently I started hearing about opposite of this - that somebody's skin didnt improve, but became worse, or that somebody, despite of being relatively thin before, gained weight... And I hear a lot about bloating. I am bloated a lot as it is, and it is not something that I want to joke about. Is this true, does this diet cause bloating?

Buying cruelty-free makeup is pretty self-explanatory, I think. I dont want any rabbit or a mouse or monkey to suffer shampoo in their eyes. NO. I will continue to use the stuff that I already bought, until I use it up, then I will do my best to find cruelty-free replacements to everything. Which I know will be hard. I live in Russia, cruelty free movement here is very small, practically unheard of (not to mistake with being vegan. There are vegans. But cruelty free is pretty new). If you ask a sales lady at a makeup counter if they have cruelty free stuff - you will get a blank stare. (Seriously I was once browsing some online store, while at work (which is ok) and my colleagues asked me what I was looking for? I said - i was looking for cruelty free brands, and he then was like "Are you nuts!?" like it was something wrong T_T.)

So, my questions are as follows:

1 - Does vegan diet actually cause bloating? And farts? I would love to hear genuine personal experience.

2 - Cruelty free makeup - am I supposed to look at brands as a whole, or is it allowed to look and individual ingredients of every product? I was just happy to find out that my deodorant (I dreaded the thought of having to find a cruelty free deo) turned out to be cruelty free, so I looked at the company's website, and in their FAQ it says that they dont test, but some of their stuff contain traces of milk protein and black caviar. Can I buy the stuff that just doesnt contain those, or not? Should I ban this brand from my shopping list?

3 - Again about cruelty free. I see there are parents companies and daughter companies, and sometimes there is Company A, a totally cruelty-free company, but then they sell out to a Company B that tests of animals. I think it's a grey area. On one hand, if you continue to but stuff from Company A, your money still goes to Company B. Nut on the other hand - if you buy only from Company A, and not from the Company B itself or any other Company c, J, H or whatever that tests on animals too - doesnt that send a message? 4 - I have relatives who live outside the city on their own land. It’s not really a farm, they just grow their own vegetables, and this year they happened to have their own chickens (they were sort of gifted) - can I eat their eggs? Would that be ethical?

Please, if you have something to say -  share your personal experience (especially if you have been vegan for a long time) and thoughts. If you have links to useful info about this - I would greatly appreciate it.

[youth-diet-health]

Food is often approaching the mentality of impending failure. Many people have tried and failed many meals in their past so that they try the next new diet, knowing that they will fail in this attempt too.

Guess what? Henry Ford once said, " if you believe that you can or do not believe that you can always be right ", if you believe that you will fail in this diet, you destroy yourself to fail even before you deprive yourself of your 1st bite. Think about it before you start, because only the real masochie might find the pleasure of sustaining this vicious cycle without ever stopping to wonder why none of the meals did you. You're the only person who can control your need to eat. You're the only one who can watch and notice when you eat for emotional loyalty and when you eat is essential. You and you alone can get out of your chair and on your feet, you're the only one who can take responsibility for the situation you find yourself in. There are medical exceptions, but even in these cases, if you try to get food after food and fail repeatedly, you need to realize at some point that it is absolutely unlikely that the diet is not working.

We must all be responsible for our successes and failures in life. It's not different when it comes to food. There's a little better feelings in the world than someone notices and commends your efforts, and if you're too fat, unfortunately, it may take a little longer for people to actually notice what weight you've lost. A lot of men and women simply give up because nobody's noticed, which is unfortunate, give your protective practices a chance to work before you decide they're a loser, and you might surprise yourself with extreme success. The truth is, very few people hold themselves responsible for their nutrition and weight loss goals. That means a lot of people give up without really bothering to make an effort. If you have a problem with yourself in charge of your food plans, maybe you should be good at partner. You must be held accountable for your stated goals of nutrition and loss of weight in order to achieve any lasting results. If you do not have success in the past, it may be time to bring some accountability to the picture and make it happen. We all sat down and pulled out our revolutions in the new year, and most of them are going to diet. Chickensings, scoops, prepped, shakes, shakes.. When it comes down to it, you stop doing it, it doesn’t work, or keep getting sick or many, many different reasons why we quit dieting. Many Americans probably didn’t think about why they diet.

The reason the doctors tell a certain person to go on a diet and it could be a chance that many Americans are bullying themselves or even others are bullying them into going on a diet. When a person is overweight, it puts stress on the person's lungs, heart and skeleton because it can’t hold the weight from the fat. Well not worry and not get to scared yet I am going to tell a person who this concern to, but the Doctors say, where it starts, effects to a person’s health, a person’s not have to be overweight to be doing a diet, and how a person can stay on a diet and still eat fast food at the same time, to me this sounds amazing so let’s get going and learn some great ways for our sleeves. Dieting uses millions of people all over the world. Most nutrition plans are used worldwide because of the Declaration. People imagine that food is a healthy and easy way to lose weight. Dieting is a way to lose weight in a short time. He works for some people, but he doesn't work for others.

Everyone has their own opinion on food, but there's no good. Food changes eating habits, so people will eat the lowest calories, and they'll lose that unwanted pound. Food is good for the individual when they use it right, because it helps him to stay healthy. The first thing is what causes weight gain and how people can change it all by doing three big factors which are watching our balance of our metabolism, making sure a person has plenty of energy, exercising and then knowing what genes are that we get our parents. (Lean, Clinical Handbook of Weight Management book) With genes, weight can’t just come but the lack of exercise and the way a person eats. Why do we pay doctors a lot extra than our income just for our nonsense usage of junk food and destroying our health.

We have to stay a diet person and maintain our health better and be ideal parents for our children and our family. We have to save our family from extra use of oil in our houses. We all know oil and fast food is a basic need of every person, but we have to maintain an average use of it in our houses for staying away from health issues at the age of young health is the best partner of every person. The actual wealth of a person is her own health. If he is healthy, he conquerors the world, but if he's dull, he can't able to do little help for his own body and his own family. An unhealthy person is a burden for his own family. I have to suggest everything.y reviewers  to make some time for games in thier life's and prefer physical gaming more then social games to your childs physical fitness is so useful for our lives so please set a games in your schedule and Be brave, Be healthy, Be helping, Be kind.

Hope you like my blog. Please comment on your reviews and publish it as soon as possible. Thank you.

#AWANICAWAAM

[theresgloryforyou]

excerpt:

According to the National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance, one out of three doctors responds to obesity negatively and associates it with poor hygiene, hostility, dishonesty, and noncompliance, viewing fat patients as “lazy, lacking in self-control, non-compliant, unintelligent, weak-willed and dishonest.”

“Doctors may think they are doing their jobs by focusing on patients’ weights,” said Dr. Rebecca Puhl, deputy director of the Rudd Center for Food Policy and Obesity. But the effects of weight discrimination, both physical and mental, can be harmful to patients. “I do see this in health providers just as much as the general population, which is that maybe stigma isn’t such a bad thing. Maybe it will motivate people to lose weight. Maybe it will provide incentives for weight loss. But that is not what we see in research. We see the opposite — that in fact, stigmatizing people about their weight actually reinforces behaviors in health that increase body weight and obesity.”

As weight discrimination has increased in recent years — roughly 40 percent of adults report having experienced some form of weight stigma — so have obesity rates. A positive correlation between experiencing weight bias and developing eating disorders has been documented, and two studies have reported that overweight children are more likely to binge after being teased about their weight. Nor do these habits change as we age. In a 2006 study of more than 2,000 overweight and obese women who were part of a weight loss support group, 79 percent said they turned to food after experiencing weight stigma. Another common response: refusing to diet.

Johanna Tan encountered that stigma when she gained 80 pounds in three months after beginning the hormonal birth control Depo-Provera. Her doctor suggested weight loss, and she chose a weight loss clinic. In the weeks after undergoing her doctor-mediated diet of 500 to 800 calories a day, Tan began experiencing episodes of chest pain so severe she made more than one trip to the emergency room. Her general practitioner blamed her symptoms on her large breasts. “Never mind that my boobs have always been this big, and this was a new symptom,” Tan said, laughing wryly as she explained she had been performing special exercises and getting massage treatments to help ease the symptoms. But it wasn’t her breasts that were causing the pain, it was her gallbladder. Gallstones had blocked her common bile duct, and if left untreated it could cause acute liver failure. The cause of the gallstones? Rapid weight loss. Neither Tan’s weight gain nor her loss had been correctly assessed by her doctors. (Depo-Provera lists weight gain as a common side effect. When Tan voiced concerns to one doctor, she was told, “Everyone gets more hungry. You just need to not eat more.”)

The assumption that any health issues a fat person experiences can be chalked up to weight has not gone unnoticed by the fat community. Marilyn Wann was motivated to pursue fat activism after what she describes as her Really Bad Day, when a man she was dating told her he was embarrassed to introduce her to his friends because of her weight, and she was denied health insurance because Blue Shield of California deemed her morbidly obese.

“This double whammy of social and institutional exclusion based on my weight woke me up,” she said. “Until then, I had hoped to avoid the impact of anti-fat attitudes by avoiding the whole topic. But hiding and silence and avoidance didn’t keep the yuck from finding me. So I recognized that I had to come out as a fat person. The next day, I went to a copy store and made up business cards for my new print zine, which I decided to call FAT!SO? — ‘For People Who Don’t Apologize for Their Size!’ Immediately, my life became less stressful. Of course, I still encounter anti-fat attitudes and weight-based exclusions, but I have drawn a line between me and the hatefulness. It makes a huge difference.”

Wann still experiences bias, especially at the doctor. “I know before I enter the door that the whole system prioritizes its prejudice over my well-being,” she said. “The prejudice is what’s necessary to the institution as it stands. The medical establishment, the insurance agencies, public health agencies that are government-based have always advanced their agenda on the back of fat people. … The institutions of our supposed health systems — in the government agencies, in the insurance companies, in all of the medical practices — are saturated or have deeply ingrained anti-fat bigotry.”

[gerinurse]

Disgusted.....

Sometimes the way overweight people are treated disgusts me. Especially the way they are treated by the health care system. My sister is a heavy woman. She is likely about 20lbs heavier than I am but she is also 3inches taller. She has been having knee issues and x-rays show nothing. Here in Canada to get an MRI you have to see a specialist. Her doctor referred her to an orthopaedic surgeon and from the description of her issue I would say from experience that she has a tear in the cartilage of the knee. I suffered the same thing myself in the past and required surgery plus the basic physical tests that even I can administer indicate this is the problem. She saw the surgeon yesterday and I spoke with her today and I am so angry I can barely see straight. The asshole had the nerve to look at her and without even examining her said "I can tell right now there's nothing wrong with your knee that a couple hundred pounds of weight loss wouldn't cure." Really! That's your diagnosis? First of all if she lost 200lbs she would be anorexic because her size is very deceiving to her actual weight. Second totally rude and unprofessional. Third how dare he insult and belittle a person just because of their size. I asked her how she responded and she said she didn't know what to say she was so shocked. She said that he did finally agree to order an MRI but told her she'd be waiting a long time because he didn't feel she was a urgent case. Unfortunately there is no recourse for that here except to pay out of pocket to go out of province. I told her that if she has to see him again I want to go with her, i have a damn good reputation within the health care community and I also don't take shit from any doctor in my job or personally. I also requested his name as I am planning to report him to the health region as well as the physicians board here. If you don't want to treat patient with dignity and respect then find a new god damn profession! A doctor certainly has the right to express concerns regarding your weight and the impact on your health but they do not have the right to insult and belittle patients and if he treated an intelligent young woman that way, how does he treat an elderly person or someone who has intellectual difficulties? 😡

[fatphobiabusters]

Hey guys! Your blog is absolutely a place of comfort in the world, especially these days for me when I have fears implemented about my weight, and honestly stress from home regarding it (which happens on occasion) hasn’t been easy to cope with until I come back and see your posts and answers from others comforting them too… so thank you :) I’ve honestly try helping others feeling better about their body image on the internet too! It absolutely hurts that we’re told that ‘being fat is terrible in society’. I apologise if I do go a bit off topic onwards (also please keep this anonymous!) I have not really had the opportunity to open up to anyone regarding all of this at once.

I was told apparently some relatives died of diabetes long time back and also on the other half of my family I could have heart disease… and since yesterday I’ve never felt so stressed and worried because of my parent’s implementing that fear… (like how apparently my legs could get cut off because of diabetes because I’ll have trouble standing up properly and etc. according to dad) I mean it really scares me these days… I have seen comforting posts from ok2befat and on occasion bigfatscience, but now…

And on top of that they had doubts about doing anything for myself (i.e. getting a job, which is hard to get where I live unfortunately). And that came from a lack of confidence in the past, before I gained weight. Being incredibly shy and etc. I still don’t know how to develop confidence so it’s 'permanent’ if there is such thing. I personally don’t regard weight as a problem to myself as why I don’t find much real life friends… And it was definite when I gained weight I did not have doubts or terrible moments about myself caused by people outside at home. (I was expected to lose weight apparently 'buying more clothes’ wasn’t the answer to… whatever the question was). When I decided 'screw it, I’m almost an adult, I’m buying clothes myself’ (this was months back), I never got commended for taking it upon myself to go out, on my own, and buy myself a new pair of jeans for the season. Instead, I was told 'I hope you don’t go up to a size x’. (Honestly I love having a bigger body, and it’s better than when I was skinnier in all honesty).

My parents are fatphobic unfortunately…mum mid-June last year blamed the fact I was on a PC all the time for my weight gain (which was not true since I use to always be underweight even doing the same thing as before), and also I think my mum… 'concern trolled’ me November in the same year (about how I’ll have medical problems in the future), given that I did not want to take a blood test at the doctors (my mum forced me to go to the doctors prior by booking an appointment meant for both of us, she never had her part at all and later that day I tried ignoring her whilst forcing out a conversation on me). They never mentioned the word fat around me (replaced with big), but dad did strike the term 'obesity’ on me Mid-June last year once from how I was eating at a fast food place on that day I went out with him. I’m often encouraged these days to take a walk, but it actually discourages me (I always felt my parents were a bad influence since a long time back); if I want to do something, I’ll do it. But they’re under the belief I’m not going to do anything about myself like get apply for jobs or go out more often or anything (it’s not easy hitting that send resume button for a job if it’s something I cannot handle; I want to start at places which in a sense, 'easy’ starting points to develop myself. So in a way I’m kinda ruined if my parents can’t understand, and no welfare support doesn’t help either since I’m not 'financially supported’ either.

Also one person I don’t believe I’ve seen anyone ask or warn about in terms of media promoting fat people in a negative term: Dashiegames/DashieXP on YouTube. He is no doubt funny, but he does sometimes make some fatphobic jokes (in a Tekken gameplay, he’s fighting off a character called Bob, and Dashie said something like 'he should be called BLOB’.) But from a Mario gameplay he did, he mentioned something like 'it’s okay to poke fun at yourself’ (he is an overweight person himself apparently? He is on the bigger side, and was referring to himself). So a heads up; unless you really need some smiles and to laugh at someone raging out in a game or horror game reactions, he has been for me brilliant, BUT I wouldn’t recommend if you are gonna get offended by the occasional jokes. I’m not too sure on his ableist language either, I haven’t actually paid attention.

I truly am sorry if I said so much… like I said, it’s hard to open up to people these days, it sucks :( Also if I said anything ableist (I don’t think I did but I’m very careful about it these days).

Thanks in advance for your response and for being an awesome blog. :) I love to help out where I can my own way with music (not sure if mashups would work, I’d love to spread the message across that way)

Kind Regards,

M.M.M [Redacted for anonymity] 

Hey, There Thank you so much for taking the time and finding the courage to post here. As promised, I kept it semi-anonymous. I’m re-blogging it under me rather than where you posted it from.   You had a lot to get off your chest! Nothing wrong with that, but I will try my best to keep up. And lets start with your health. 

M, While your parents have good intentions, they’re horribly fatphobic. I’m glad you are well aware of this.  I also hope you know that you do not have to put up with their behavior. Being all about Social Justice is not a bad thing [ I dont know why people try and make it a bad thing ] . And i’m glad you’re fighting the good fight to make sure everyone is created equal. 

As far as the health issues with your family,  Correlation doesn't always mean causation. Being fat doesn't always automatically put you at risk for having these. In Fact ,  with this situation I believe you would most likely have issues with heart or diabetes because of family history rather than being fat. There are plenty of people who are not fat and have those issues because of it being hereditary, just like there are plenty of fat people who do not have these issues because of their weight.  Even as far as losing a limb, No worries! You’re talking to a fat amputee here! :) Been one since I was a kid [ both chubby + amputee ] .... and while it may take some time to get used to, you have someone as support. Not that i’m saying I want this for you.. .but if we’re talking worst case scenarios, you got me on your side!

Still, with those two on your side, it doesn't hurt to look into ways to make your life easier [only if you wish to]. There are plenty of sites that offer healthy living for diabetes prevention and heart health. But, please please please  Focus on how you feel rather than what the scale tells you. There are so many stories people share here where followers get blind sighted on weight loss that they invalidate the hard work and choices they make, almost to the point where they end up unhealthier than when they started! 

Mental health is just as important as physical health. Learning what your limits out, strengthening your coping skills and overall self care is the key to make the other aspects of your life easier. I saw that you were following @coping-skill-toolkit [ *shameful self-plug* ] and I hope I can help you build that knowledge to be kind to yourself so you can continue to be awesome.  And yes, that includes opening up to the right kind of people, like us! We’re here to help you fight fatphobia of all kinds . All of us are on your side.  Even when you go and shop for a new pair of jeans . :) [ Kudos, by the way! ]  Best Wishes,  Mod Dom  P.S Thanks for the heads up on DashieGames and DashieXP, by the way. Ive never watched them... but for those who might be interested and are uncomfortable with those sort of jokes, then they can keep an eye to avoid. 

[lenixsocial]

I’m Fine.

Earlier today a friend who I hadn’t talked to in awhile asked how I was doing and out of some knee-jerk retail employee reaction that’s been ingrained in me for 16 years I came back immediately with “I’m fine”.

Now I get that everyone says it, and it’s beyond common to hear it when asked the question in public even if you aren’t fine and especially if you are working retail or in customer service where you face people every day. You are forced to say it because if you don’t say it or say you aren’t well or anything of the sort well...societal pressures being what they are people will give you this look like there are lobsters crawling out of your nose. They will also think you are Patient Zero and will treat you accordingly, standing further back, and judgmentally glaring at you.

Still, it doesn’t explain why I still say it even now, three years removed from retail and customer service. I still say it, every time I’m asked. It comes out before I even know it’s on it’s way out of my face hole.

My friend John said something akin to “well, judging by your Facebook profile I’m going to say you’re not fine but...” and he’s right. I’m really not. I’m about the furthest thing from fine.

I spend a good majority of every day alone (except for two days and the time my wife isn’t at work). I mean yes, there’s our cat but he isn’t known as a great conversationalist. He’s cute, great to have staring contests with, and to take naps with. I’m alone otherwise. Sure there’s TV - YouTube, Netflix, Hulu, CBS All Access, and Apps from half a dozen cable channels and the channels themselves. I’m tired of TV. I’m tired of the same old thing. The rut is getting to me and it’s only one facet of a complex lattice that forms why I’m most certainly not fine.

I’m not fine because of the drugs and lest you think I’m an addled addict try again. The drugs in question here are blood pressure meds. In ever increasing dosages. Different types, different mechanisms of action, different side effects, different reactions and interactions the doctors didn’t bargain for. Some of them are so bad that I go away and withdrawal from even doing things I enjoy to cope with the strange feelings. Others like the drug I was taking up until a few days ago have me thinking I’m going to end up in a hospital again as the feelings it gives me are akin to having a heart attack - chest pressure, arm pain, muscle stiffness, and muscle twitches. Now, don’t be concerned because all those are either common or less common side effects but one of them — just one of them: muscle stiffness was enough to raise concern from one doctor to pull me off of it and within two days, I felt tons better. His suspicion was an allergic reaction to one of the compounds in it. I’m just happy he overrode my cardiologist and told me to stop taking it.

I’m not fine because I’m constantly teased about my weight. I’m actually overweight yes, but there’s more to unpack here. With the rate at which people with my disease lose body mass, the “bumper” of excess weight is actually not a terrible thing as my body could sustain itself off of its reserves if I ever begin to spiral. On the obverse being obese is not healthy and I get that. Another part of the issue here is the biweekly infusions I get increase metabolism and increase hunger about ten fold. I’m eating sometimes after my infusion and I honestly don’t even realize it. I’m stuffing my face and I just can’t ever seem to satiate my desire for more food. All of this gives me the worlds most visible ugly pot belly. Well, loss of core muscles, side muscles, back muscles and pectoral muscles from muscle wasting have certainly not helped either as it pushes my stomach forward making it look even larger. My dad and brother razzed me a few days ago and I played along and I was seconds from blowing up. I was having a drug reaction with severe chest pain, dealing with a dead car battery, and putting up with them poking at my gut and calling me fat. Yeah. Trifecta of stress.

Which leads me to I’m not fine because of stress and anxiety attacks. Crippling anxiety attacks. They get so damn bad that I can’t distinguish between cardiac issues and anxiety. And most of the time if I’m on a new drug it might be all three: a legitimate cardiac issue, a medication issue, or an anxiety attack and I just have no idea what to do so I sit quietly. Sometimes for hours with ocean noises playing off of YouTube. Something to focus on that isn’t pain and sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t and when it doesn’t I take naps. Related to the attacks are fear response shocks. In a normal person walking up behind someone and scaring them is fun. Jump cuts are great. To me, anything like that causes my neck muscles to seize, a headache to start, and nerve pain to shoot down both arms. Sometimes the severity lasts hours, sometimes it lasts days. This then also informs a general anxiety about new situations, doctors, airport travel, legal counsel anything. My blood pressure is usually sky high even with the meds when I’m seeing a new doctor and my fear has been at an all time high since I was admitted in the ER last February and spent a week in the hospital.

I’m not fine because I see people giving me the stink eye. Yes. I park in the handicap spot. Yes I have a cane. Yes I also have a motorized wheelchair. I can walk but not very far, but apparently if you have a wheelchair and you are seen walking to it and sitting in it (for instance I park it outside of restrooms because it’s a pain in the ass to maneuver it into a stall) people will give you the dirtiest looks. People will see you in your chair and also think you need to be saved. This happens a lot. Usually in a crowded retail store. I’m agnostic. I don’t care if you want to pray for me...that’s great. I’m fine with that. I feel it’s not my right to judge someone else’s choices or religion or absence of religion. But making a spectacle of it IN PUBLIC? No. And blocking my path with your cart? Double no.

I’m not fine because my wife isn’t fine. She takes care of me and I love her to death but she also gets the dark side of me when I’m at my lowest and most miserable and she has begun to develop anxiety attacks herself so crippling she has trouble breathing. It’s not easy being a caretaker and she does it quite well but it isn’t what she bargained for or expected and she has plenty of things on her plate as it is.

I’m not fine because every friend I had made stopped coming around and those that have stuck around or want to do something I have to explain my condition to so that it doesn’t look like I’m standing them up when my body decides now would be a great time to have more pain. It wouldn’t be the first time I’ve had to cancel last minute because of it.

I’m not fine because of irritable bowel syndrome and GERD. Both of which I have and cause about 75-80% of my daily hell. The pain gets so severe at times I just want to scream and even knowing what foods do what to me doesn’t help anymore. Sometimes...most of the time my stomach or guts just hurt. Bending over hurts, leaning to the side hurts, anything where I have to move against my stomach, really.

I’m not fine because I’m now getting constant pain in my left hand which makes playing guitar—my one creative outlet incredibly difficult. Actually the frustration of not being able to play standing up, or playing a guitar that weighs more than 4lbs is also likewise a root cause of why I’m not fine.

I appreciate the support from everyone but people will say “call me if you need to talk”. Quite frankly you weren’t told you have an incurable disease that will slowly eat away all your muscles, potentially leave you deaf, and eventually kill you and even if they find a cure they can’t undo any damage incurred by the disease. So if I end up with 80% of my muscles gone, and they fix it, I’ll still be wheelchair bound with a bilateral paralysis in my diaphragm, unable to grow back any muscle mass that’s already died. Like I said: I appreciate the support but all of what I just said is too much for most people to deal with or they weren’t bargaining for all of that.

But now you know.

How am I?

I’m fine.

Because it’d just take too long to fully explain all of the ways I’m really not fine at all.

[xxparabellumxx-blog]

A Cry For  ̶H̶e̶l̶p̶  Validation

Since when I was about 12 years old, when I was already massively struggling with food and weight, occasionally, someone who wasn’t part of my family would voice their concern about my eating habits, at times even directly referring to the risk of me developing anorexia, while other times it’d be a more sublte remark. My family’s reaction was usually something like “hahaha that fatass, i think not”, again, sometimes a little more subtle than that, but not much. And not always. They made the same jokes when doctors told me my blood sugar level was too low and that I should definitely eat some time soon. They continued to make that “joke” for months, even years after, each time I was going to eat or skip a meal or when someone randomly mentioned food. “Better eat, you know what the doctor said, you should watch your blood sugar level hahahhah”, usually accompanied by a direct or indirect comment about my weight or body. Always in the context of weight or body shaming. Now, while around that time I was slightly overweight (nothing dramatic, just a slightly chubby kid. I also was in so many sports clubs that I had a different activity after school every. single. day. I wasn’t lazy, I was rather active and always had been), it was defintely uncalled for. I learned to invalidate any medical issues and blame literally everything bad that ever happened to me on my weight. More specifically, on my lack of self control and discipline that had shaped my body, or rather failed to. (This is the short version of course. There was a lot more to all of that.) At age 14 I was already the weight loss QUEEN. -10kg in two weeks, no big deal. I’d do that several times and be cheered on my family. I had a perfectly healthy BMI by then, but that didn’t matter. Not only did I see myself as he fattest and most disgusting person in the world, regardless of my flat stomach and perfectly alright figure, I was deeply ashamed of ever needing food. Feeling hungry was a disgrace. Giving in and actually eating was a disgrace. Not losing weight rapidly was a disgrace. Every normal body function made me feel ashamed. Every curve of my body, my boobs, my hips, my thighs. Every rib I couldn’t see without sucking in my stomach. I got deep into heavily restricting my food intake and exercising until late at night. Then proceeding to do crunches in my bed. Sleep is for the weak, right? It was around the age of 15 or 16 that I started to be more obvious about my disordered habits. People started noticing that I’d never eat in public, that I’d skip meals, that I was obsessing over my exercise schedule. And each time someone mentioned any of that, I panicked. I felt exposed for being obsessed with my weight and STILL not having the perfect body. I felt like a miserable failure for putting in so much effort and still not being good enough. But I also felt like people were finally seeing my struggle. And how badly I was struggling. I remember being utterly terrified when after half a week of fasting I fainted in P.E. Sure, I was feeling like that lazy fatass kid that embarrassingly collaped while trying to be active, I was deeply ahamed, but my physical condition also scared me so much, that I decided to eat when I got home. But I didn’t really feel like eating. I had no appetite and each time i considered what to have, I just felt sick. I got worse physically, so I grabbed a cube of cheese - and gagged. I put it back and lay in bed. I was miserable by then. Blurred vision, dizziness, nausea, pain. I was shaking. I was on the edge of passing out several times. Walked to the fridge to get that cheese cube several times. Gagged at the mere thought of eating it and put it back several times. Until I decided to keep it next to my bed and eventually, after a long, long time of mental preparation, I took a tiny bite and swallowed. It felt nearly impossible not to throw up, but I managed to keep it down. I wanted to eat, I wanted to feel better, I wanted to be healthy, but I couldn’t. My body wouldn’t let me. It took a while until I was able to get myself to eat little portions again and I only did because the incident had left me terrified. I still felt fat. I still felt like a disgrace. I still wanted to lose weight. But I also wanted people to see I was struggling. So I started to talk about my excessive exercise. Talk about skipping meals. Talk about not being hungry at all. But I did it with a smile, full of joy, as if it was a relief that I didn’t have an appetite so I didn’t even have a desire to stuff my face with all the unhealthy food everyone my age was craving. I even started talking about how fat I was, a topic that I would never have DARED to bring up before, because I realised that people started reacting differently. They seemed concerned. They pointed out that I had already lost so much weight, that my stomach was flat, that I didn’t have anything to worry about when it came to my figure. They suggested I should make sure to eat regularly and be less hard on myself when exercising. That I should allow myself some food I enjoy. If you do not have an eating disorder, chances are you cannot possibly understand the thrill of all that. The joy it caused me. They were seeing my struggle. They were seeing my effort. AND the process. The more obvious I was about my doubtlessly disordered habits, the better I felt about myself. But was that a cry for help? Was that me wanting to stop? Next thing I know is I’m addicted to the feling of that validation. I’m making myself worse so more people would notice, more people would point out my weight loss, my extraordinary discipline and self control that they usually thought impulsive, over-emotioal little me was lacking. Not to mention I finally had people worried about me. People cared. But then they also wanted me to stop. Well, I couldn’t have that, could I? If I stopped, all that constant validation would be gone. I’d have to go back to feeling fat and ugly and unlovable and undisciplined and like a failure again WITHOUT people constantly reassuring me the opposite was the case. No bloody way. So, of course, I had to pretend to be fine in order to stop people from wanting to stop me. I needed to go on making obvious progress but without worrying people enough to take that away from me. My own family was still body shaming me and making jokes about everything food related all the time, so I didn’t have the self esteem to stop restricting my food intake, constantly weighing and measuring myself, over-exercising etc. That wasn’t an option. In my head, there was literally no option other than making myelf worse and constantly finding new ways to get away with it. When I cried out, I clearly needed help. But each time I told myself I only wanted the validation.

(All of that was very different from how I talk about my struggle nowadays to point out my recovery progress and call out the disordered thoughts instead of embracing and encouraging them)

What motivated me to sit down and write all of this down today? Well, I see more and more young people joke about their clearly disordered eating and I see other people attacking them for “normalising” unhealthy eating habits that can cause a severe disorder. BUT THIS IS WHAT WE ALL DO. This is what eating disorders tend to make you do. You invalidate yourself because you want to talk about your struggle, but you’re too scared of the consequences of someone taking you seriously. This is the only way most of us can manage to ever talk about their struggle at all. Maybe the people casually joking about skipping meals every day and just drinking iced coffee are assholes. Maybe they’re just like you. Maybe they’re just unsure whether they’re crying out for help or validation. 

[unlikelydreamlandcreation-blog]

Insurance company is doing something very very fishy please help?

"Insurance company is doing something very very fishy please help?

Ok so I just leased a new car and 4 days after got hit by a drunk driver in the rear end.. he had no insurance and no registration. Cops came and arrested him. I had uninsured but still had to pay a deductible for something not even my fault of doing.   Now after the work has been done on the car I get a call from the underwriting team and they tell me that my information was incorrect when I first created my policy ( I am almost positive it was NOT inccorect) and now they needed to update it with new information ( technically the same damn info we started with) and my rate dropped 20 a month. COOL. NOT.   He then continued to say he requires my old insurance policy from a completely different vehicle to see the coverage on that and that if I dont give it to him in a week my policy will be canceled or I will have to pay 900 next month and 500 following each month WTF! why is it honestly any of there concern what the hell coverage I had on my old beater car? Supposedly if i just had minimum on my beater before that he can raise my rates up really high too with that.   i feel like there just trying to screw me and cut there losses and get rid of me. Is this even legal? I had a set policy in order and everything! You cant just demand 900 dollars for no reason.   I have never heard of this before.

BEST ANSWER:  Try this site where you can compare quotes: : http://averageinsurancecosts.xyz/index.html?src=tumblr 

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i love my mom but i wanna pick what i drive i want a two door car because if i get a 4 door car ppl are gonna leave there trash in it and im gonna be pissed off. My great great grandfather told me that the driver don't pick the car the car picks the driver and i understood him i want a car that is suitable to standards the most important thing it has to have is a sunroof/moonroof cd player and all power options. my mom just doesn't understand me or my life can someone please help me just a straight shot of info which car insurance is more expensive a 2 door car or a 4 door car.

About how much would insurance cost for a 2004 subaru wrx?

for a 16/17 year old im a student and i took driving course does the subaru impreza RS have alot cheaper insurance i dont need exact price just a bout how much how about a 2002 or 2003

Insurance company is doing something very very fishy please help?

Ok so I just leased a new car and 4 days after got hit by a drunk driver in the rear end.. he had no insurance and no registration. Cops came and arrested him. I had uninsured but still had to pay a deductible for something not even my fault of doing.   Now after the work has been done on the car I get a call from the underwriting team and they tell me that my information was incorrect when I first created my policy ( I am almost positive it was NOT inccorect) and now they needed to update it with new information ( technically the same damn info we started with) and my rate dropped 20 a month. COOL. NOT.   He then continued to say he requires my old insurance policy from a completely different vehicle to see the coverage on that and that if I dont give it to him in a week my policy will be canceled or I will have to pay 900 next month and 500 following each month WTF! why is it honestly any of there concern what the hell coverage I had on my old beater car? Supposedly if i just had minimum on my beater before that he can raise my rates up really high too with that.   i feel like there just trying to screw me and cut there losses and get rid of me. Is this even legal? I had a set policy in order and everything! You cant just demand 900 dollars for no reason.   I have never heard of this before.

""What is Cheaper, Insurance Group 6E or 4P?""

What is Cheaper, Insurance Group 6E or 4P""

What medical insurance will cover me?

i'm 19 years old no medical insurance i'm in city college part time but my parents aren't an option.i'm also an LPN BUT ONLY WORK PART TIME AND CAN'T GET JOB INSURANCE i noticed i was growing excessive facial hair and irregular periods was dx with PCOS i would like to seek treatment for it what medical insurance company would cover it seeing that i was already dx if any?

""I have a NJ DUI, How much will my insurance go up?""

I got a dui in NJ, no accident involved, how much will my insurance go up per month, if i pay 168 per month now? I would like some personal examples, etc.""

How much would car insurance cost with a 2008 kia optima im 17 years old?

i get my lisence in 2 months i live in south florida and im gunna have to pay for my insurace so i need to know so i know how much im gunna have to work

Whats the cheapest motorcycle insurance for me?

Im 18 i live in upstate New York. its my first street bike. I ride motocross and i have a 450f (if that makes any differance) im looking to get a crotch rocket (gsxr 1000) I heard progressive is the cheapest. How much?

What would the cheapest car to insure be (uk)?

any suggestions on what would be a cheap car to insure for a new driver (18)

Looking for a Psychiatrist who accepts Medicare Insurance?

I have bipolar disorder and need a psychiatrist who accepts Medicare Insurance a.s.a.p. Please include doctor's name/phone #, my area is (818), San Fernando Valley, Encino, California. Also, I would like to make new friends who are dealing with bipolar disorder. Thank you.""

Temporary car insurance only 18?

Just wondering if anyone knows where i could get 1 months car insurance but i'm only 18? Cheers

Kit car insurance at 17?

Watching an old top gear episode where they showed an mr2 (love em) converted into a ferrari, something like a 430, they said that his premium decreased. I called up an insurance company today, im 17, looking to buy a toyota starlet and transfer all the panels from a glanza v onto the starlet but nothing from the engine bay, so it would be classified as a kit car? but no where near as high risk as not having better performance parts or the turbo added. The end result was me spending ages on the phone and them saying they wouldnt insure me, even though it is a kit car and no performance parts, please please please... can someone with better knowledge clarify why they would decline me when it should make it cheaper!! Ty Jordan""

Im going to be in Wisconsin my friend has a car for me..can i get insurance to cover me there?

Im going to wisconsin for their summer and my friend im staying with has a car i can use for the period im there. im 21 is there a way for me to get covered by insurance for the 4 months im there? Im from New Zealand. Thanks

How much will insurance cost for a BMW z3?

I'm 16 years old but will be 17 next month. So lets say Im 17 for now. Im looking to buy a BMW z3 because they are pretty cheap and really nice cars. I maintain a 3.0 GPA and have a clean record and live in Southern California. Anyone have an estimate on how much insurance will be?

Car insurance involving my best friend?

recently my dad got me a car, the car's in my name, the car insurance is in my name and everything to do with the car is in my name but my dad's on the insurance as an additional driver which on my insurance additional drivers are free on my insurance, does that mean I would be able to add my best friend to the insurance enabling her to drive my car and my dad to teach her aswell under my insurance?""

Car Insurance cost for 18 year old?

I'm 18 and am a beginner in driving and my dad wanted to set up my insurance. The car i would be using would be my dads 1967 Oldsmobile cutlass (classic Muscle car). So i was wondering how much insurance would be at my age with the car i would be using, and with no bad previous record for accidents and/or tickets.""

Need Cheap Medical Health Insurance?

Hello, could anybody recommend me a site for cheap medical health insurance.I know many sites, but their offers are too expensive.""

HELP!!!! Insurance company saying I owe money after a car accident that happened 2 years ago! What do I do?

2 years ago I got into a 4 car pile up accident. The accident was my fault. After the wreck happened, my insurance company took care of all the people who were involved in the wreck but me because I had only liability. No one was hurt in the wreck. I recieved a letter from my insurance company that I owed them $700.00. I paid it and they told me everything was taken care of and never heard anything about the accident. Now 2 years later I get a letter from the Credit Collection company saying I owe them $82,000 dollars!!!! WHAT SHOULD I DO?!?!? How do I find out what they want me to pay so much money for??? and what do I do if i cant pay this!? there is NO WAY I can afford to pay that much $$!!! How do I keep my credit from messing up or is it already messed up since the collectio company sent me a letter??? PLEASE HELP! anyone who knows anything about this or has been through this...""

Where can I find affordable family health insurance?

Looking to find several health company quotes.

What is the best and cheap health insurance?

What is the best and cheap health insurance

""Is a Ford Mustang, Chevy Camaro or a Dodge Charger good for a first car?

My friend is 18 and goes to college and he has a Ford Mustang. I know its a sport car but is it good for it to be a first car?

""I need auto, health, and condo insurance; what is the cheapest way of doing this?""

I need a descent health plan that will cover prescriptions. I am still young and don't need much but I do have a prescription to fill that is about 250 without assistance. So I guess what I'm wondering is if I get all of them through a company like State Farm, will they give me a price break since I use them for everything? Thank you.""

What's the cheapest motorcycle insurance for a 17 year old owning a motorcycle and holding a Motorcycle L....?

Learner's permit and no DL in viriginia? Serious answers only please. I want to be the only person on the insurance.

Are company's allowed to bump up your no claims for you so you get cheaper insurance ?

A family member of mine bought a car last year from a dealership and bought the insurance through them for ease, they hadn't had a car for a few years and so lost there no claims bonus however it would seem that the company put that he had a 5 years no claim bonus on anyway so that he would get his insurance cheaper, is this legal ? Also a year has now passed and so they are looking to get insurance somewhere else because other places offer even cheaper prices, however the insurance company are saying if he moves to another insurer they will say he only has 1 year no claims, but if he stays with them he can keep his 5 years no claims and that seems a little bit shifty to. This isn't really a question but still any input on the matter would be brilliant, thanks.""

Ok.. who has the cheapest health insurance?

im doin a report in school and i need to know guestimations on health insurance? who has the cheapest and on what company?

""Looking at Insurance Quotes & found a car under our address that is not ours, what to do?""

so my family has been looking at insurance quotes the last couple of days and this random car always shows up under ours address along with the actual cars we have, my parents are worried someone might have used their name or sumthing.. how do we deal with this and who do we ask? on one of the websites I got the last 6 or so digits of the car's vin number. My brother suggested asking police department or the Security of State but who can provide us with this information and what exactly do we ask for ??""

Asking all female drivers under 25- Whats a cheap car insurer?

Asking all female drivers under 25!! Does anyone know of or have been with any cheap car insurance companies? Ive already checked quite a few but they seem really expensive...Please help!

Insurance after driving ban?

Does anybody know of any cheap car insurance company's that deal with drivers that have recantly been banned?

Insurance company is doing something very very fishy please help?

Ok so I just leased a new car and 4 days after got hit by a drunk driver in the rear end.. he had no insurance and no registration. Cops came and arrested him. I had uninsured but still had to pay a deductible for something not even my fault of doing.   Now after the work has been done on the car I get a call from the underwriting team and they tell me that my information was incorrect when I first created my policy ( I am almost positive it was NOT inccorect) and now they needed to update it with new information ( technically the same damn info we started with) and my rate dropped 20 a month. COOL. NOT.   He then continued to say he requires my old insurance policy from a completely different vehicle to see the coverage on that and that if I dont give it to him in a week my policy will be canceled or I will have to pay 900 next month and 500 following each month WTF! why is it honestly any of there concern what the hell coverage I had on my old beater car? Supposedly if i just had minimum on my beater before that he can raise my rates up really high too with that.   i feel like there just trying to screw me and cut there losses and get rid of me. Is this even legal? I had a set policy in order and everything! You cant just demand 900 dollars for no reason.   I have never heard of this before.

Where can I find information about female car insurance? Is it really cheaper than for men?

Where can I find information about female car insurance? Is it really cheaper than for men?

How can you keep your car insurance rates as low as possible?

Car insurance rates fluctuate from company to company. What tips can you offer others to help secure the most competitive rate? Yahoo! Canada Answers staff note: This question is asked by Gregory Ellis, co-founder of the the insurance shopping service kanetix.ca. Visit http://www.kanetix.ca/YAHOO_answers for more information.""

Car insurance for 16 year old 4.0 gpa?

How much would it be total if I was titled under my dads name, and my parents are divorced and the car is under my moms name is there a way I could still be under my dads, and if not thats ok, how much would the cost be added to my dads insurance costs?""

Why refused car insurance because of one criminal offence?

Can someone explain why this is happening, and since when? How does this affect your driving? I have one assault offence and have been refused car insurance, what nonsense is this country coming to?""

Please explain what comprehensive car insurance means.?

Please explain what comprehensive car insurance means.?

Is globe life a reliable insurance company?

for life insurance

How many hours do you have to work in California to be eligible for health insurance?

I work 35 hours a week, and have no health insurance. Am I eligible? Should I question this?""

Do I have to be on my moms insurance?

I am 15 1/2 and i got my permit my california's drivers permit in march. i wont be applicable to get my drivers license until september. do i have to be on my moms insurance to drive now

Which is cheaper ? Insurance on a small or mid size truck?

My son will be getting his license in a year and a half. I am thinking of going ahead & buying a used truck for him, and he can practice in it when he gets his learner's permit. He would like a truck. I have been encouraging him to get a smaller one, like a Toyota since it will be cheaper on gas, If I let him get a bigger one, like a mid size Chevy, would the insurance be cheaper. Where would I save more money--on a more fuel-efficient truck or a bigger one with cheaper insurance? I am thinking of 93-96 model years.""

DO I QUALIFY FOR DISABILITY INSURANCE ?

I HAVE PAID INTO MY DISABILITY INSUURANE FOR MANY YEARS. I RECENTLY LOST MY JOB BUT GOT ANOTHER ONE WORKING ON A AS NEEDED BASIS, NO INSURANCE, NO RETIREMENT. THEY CALL ME IN MAYBE ONCE A WEEK TO COVER. THIS JOB IS HARD MANUAL LABOR AND BECAUSE I HAVE BEEN DOING IT FOR A WHILE MY BACK HAS BEEN DAMAGED. I HAVE CONSTANT PAIN THAT WILL NOT GO AWAY. MY QUESTION IS COULD I GO OUT ON DISABILITY FROM THIS JOB EVEN THOUGH I AM AN ONCALL EMPLOYEE? THANKS""

Rental car insurance?

I want my sisters friend to rent a car for me, because i am only 19. But i want to make sure if i buy rental car insurance that i will be covered because she wont be with me. Anything helps""

How much do you pay for Insurance in your state?

I live in New Jersey and the Insurance for an auto is so high here. I pay $168 a month for a 2003 ford explorer that is loaded. I have no tickets, my record is clean. I also have lived in Utah and my Insurance was only $50 a month. Just wondering what everyone pays in different states?""

Best insurance companies for 17 year old passed my test?

ok ive pased my test and i gettin a car this week and i need some insurance on the car obviiously lol, well basically whats the cheapest car insurance all you 17 year old have and who is it with, please :)""

Why does having access to more than 1 car put your insurance premium up?

I'm trying to get insured on my mums car, the quotes on insurance comparison websites are higher when I mention that she is insured on somebody else car though...""

Laddies. Is there any good Health Insurance that is not that expensive?

I know this is a dump question to ask but is there a Health Insurance that is not that expensive out there? I live in Missouri and she is 29 years old. We have 2 kids and live pay check to pay check. We tried Medicaid but they won't cover it unless you don't work or have more kids, and both are out of the question. I don't make a lot of money where I work but it does pay the Bills. I have tried to get a 2nd Job but with my first Job it doesn't always work out. I have to work over time and that doesn't cut it with most Jobs. I am trying to find a good health insurance that I can afford to help pay for her hospital visits. Please help me.""

How much would car insurance cost for me?

i am 17 years old, have a clean record, and am earning a 3.0 gpa...anyone have any price range?""

How much does insurance cost a month?

Okay, I'm 21 years old and I'm a full time college student I work part time and I live with my mother and step-father. I'm on my fathers insurance. My father is a Department of Transportation worker he has worked for the state for about 33 years. He has PEIA insurance. He called me today and was complaining cause he got a doctors bill for me for $35...he wanted to know why and I said idk maybe it was a mistake can you pay it since it's not that much...and then he goes into this whole thing how he pays my insurance every month...blah blah blah...but he doesnt realize that my mom and my step dad do everything else I mean they pay my other bills. He hasn't paid anything since I turned 18 except for insurance (he won't even take out a loan for my education...my mom and I do that). I pay my car insurance,gas, and cell phone bill out of my part time job check cause I commute to school. He has the nerve to call me and gripe over $35!!! WTF?!?! Does anyone know how much he pays a month or about how much he pays?""

Auto insurance question???!! HELP!!!!!!?

Hello, i have a question on teen auto insurance. Now i know how bad insurance is for teens and I know sports cars are a horrible choice for a first fully insured car, but my father surprised me with a 2005 V6 Ford Mustang and I would like to know if anyone out there can help me with just telling me how much I am going to be looking in to pay. I live in Orange and I am going to be under my parents, just an estimate on how much it would be each month or 6 months will be fine and please, no rude comments. I understand how foolish it is of me to have a sports car at my age, but I already had an Altima 3.5 se-R with an air intake and drive it perfectly, always obeying speed limits, though this probably isn't going to help with the insurance cost. If you know from experience even better! thanks for ur time.""

How much is Ontario car insurance for a cheap car (<$1000) for a teen driver with a G2 licence?

I am 17 years old and recently obtained my G2 licence (Ontario) and I want to buy a cheap car (under $1000). However, I don't have a clue how much monthly insurance would be. I would be under my parents' benefits, but I would be primary driver on the vehicle... Any input is appreciated :)""

How much does car insurance cost for a 19 year old girl?

Living in South Jersey. 2 years with a license. No accidents/ tickets. GPA 3.0+. Good credit score. For a used car newer than 2003. I just need a rough estimate. I don't want some insurance agent to call me for an quote or get random e-mails from insurance companies, right now before I buy a car.""

Is ICBC Prejudiced against young drivers a 120$ a month insurance rate cars?

I am a young drivers just starting out and I drive just like anyone else, I don't consider my actions dangerous why is it though I must pay premium prices if I drive well. These rates only adjust after driving for a longer time. it can be that of statistics ? I know that amount a month for insurance alone is exorbitant and when I ask older drivers some say they pay around 50$ a month. Are there other licensures in BC for licensing for driving a car, perhaps much cheaper than ICBC ?""

Can i get Health New England Insurance in other states?

I'm thinking about moving to Virginia to be with my boyfriend once I graduate but i was wondering about my heath insurance... I have Health New England from my father, do they only provide it in New England... since it is called 'Health New England' or would i still be able to have it when i went to Virginia??""

Who Have The Best Insurance Rates?

I Hope Im Calling It Right, I Just Got My Drivers License In August, I Dont Have A Car Yet. I Just Wanted To Know For The People Who Have Cars, What The Best Company To Get, When I Do Get A Car. People Tell Me Car Insurance Compnays Go By Age To. Im Only 21 So I Know Is Gonna Be High. But I Juat Wanna Know Whats The Best One To Get And Why For Car Insurance. Thank You To All Who Answers""

Can my car insurance rate go UP if they pay for the medical bills of the other person in the car accident?

Ok so I was involved in a car accident November 10,12, I was at fault because I hit the car in the back, the guy just literally stopped and obviously even if you are right about saying that the other driver stopped too fast for you to stop,when you hit a car in the back (most of the time) you are at fault of the accident.Either way, my insurance paid for his damage ($2,000 worth) and I took my ticket to court,there I only paid for court fees but no points. Today, June 02,13 (almost 7 months after the accident) I get a letter from a lawyer( lawyer of the guy I hit in the previous accident) saying he is asking for a $10,000 on medical expenses,it says I should send the letter to my insurance company as soon as possible,which I will do tomorrow but my thing is, I don't want my insurance rate to increase, it already increased after the accident (was $130, now $170) so I'm just asking, will the insurance company approve paying for his medical expenses even if he is self-employed as a driver of big trucks (I guess he also lift heavy furniture in order to work) and has diabetes ( he was ketotic at the time of the accident,the guy is in his 60s)?? And if the insurance approves paying ( guessing he has all the medical papers in order) will my rate increase too? Again?? I have full cover in my car, and it also includes medical bills. I had to pay $1000 of deductible in order to fix my and his car so pretty much I don't want to loose more money is just horrible I am 21,full time student with full time job! Yes,is possible to do both things but honestly I don't think this is fair anymore, the guy wanted to leave at first and not only that he is sick (diabetes) and he was very rude at first but then the police ask him if he was ok and he said yes so I don't understan this... :(. Thank you!""

Does the Year of your Car affect Insurance Prices?

Does the Make of Your Car Affect How Much you are Charged for Insurance? Does the Year of Your Car Affect How Much you are Charged for Insurance? Does Having 2Doors Always Rise How Much you are Charged for Insurance? No Baby Answers.

Insurance company is doing something very very fishy please help?

Ok so I just leased a new car and 4 days after got hit by a drunk driver in the rear end.. he had no insurance and no registration. Cops came and arrested him. I had uninsured but still had to pay a deductible for something not even my fault of doing.   Now after the work has been done on the car I get a call from the underwriting team and they tell me that my information was incorrect when I first created my policy ( I am almost positive it was NOT inccorect) and now they needed to update it with new information ( technically the same damn info we started with) and my rate dropped 20 a month. COOL. NOT.   He then continued to say he requires my old insurance policy from a completely different vehicle to see the coverage on that and that if I dont give it to him in a week my policy will be canceled or I will have to pay 900 next month and 500 following each month WTF! why is it honestly any of there concern what the hell coverage I had on my old beater car? Supposedly if i just had minimum on my beater before that he can raise my rates up really high too with that.   i feel like there just trying to screw me and cut there losses and get rid of me. Is this even legal? I had a set policy in order and everything! You cant just demand 900 dollars for no reason.   I have never heard of this before.

Which is the cheapest yet reliable auto insurance company?

Which is the cheapest yet reliable auto insurance company?

I need a good car insurance company I have 6 points and a chapter 7 in my credit report?

I have two cars one needs full coverage $500.00.00 deduc.at list, the car is a 2002 ford explorer and the other one is a 1992 dodge spirit /liability only. If you know about an insurance company that gives good coverage for a decent price let me know my current policy is $166.20 a month.""

Will simply getting an STI test raise insurance rates?

I was wondering if any doctors or insurance professionals know as fact if insurance rates will increase if someone goes to their primary care physician to get an STI screening, even if they test negative for everything.""

How do i get an online auto insurance quote in British Columbia??

Fvcking stupid place! How do i get insurance online in this god damn provence!!!

Will my dads car insurance raise after I get my drivers license?

I probably worded the question wrong but my dad won't take me to drivers training school because he's worried about his car insurance rate (or something like that) going up. I'm 15 and all of my friends have done it a long time ago. I'm the only one that hasn't started it and I even explained to him that once I start driving, I don't have to keep asking him about needing a ride to practice or meetings (because I know that bothers him) but he's still bothered about his insurance rate going up. Is that even true?? Will the car insurance rate or whatever he's talking about go up after I get my permit?? Thanks!""

What type of term life insurance to get?

I am a 23 year old male that has type II diabetes. I have around $40,000 worth of debt from student loans, and I'm going to be getting married in a year. My parents currently ...show more""

Ford Mustang for a 21 years girl?????

Hi I'm thinking of getting Ford Mustang 2007 but Im a 21 years old girl.. so you think how much the insurance would be?? cuz my friend told me since its a sport car. it might be around $200 a month :(

Im trying to find cheap insurance for new driver in jersey. i am financing a car for the first time.?

im going to need full coverage since i am financing a 2009 scion tc. also im 19 years old.

""If you have car insurance, is it still valid during the period of a license suspension?""

I'm soon going to have my license suspended for 30 days. My car insurance is paid through next year. Will it still be valid during my suspension period? (i.e. liability if my girlfriend drives it even though she's licensed / insured as well or for comprehensive damage, etc.). No, I will not be driving my car or any other during my suspension period. I just wanted to know if there are generally any 'clauses' in policies that eliminate the ins. co. liability if the insured has a suspended license and something happens to the vehicle. Separate question: Does adding a car to your policy trigger a license check by the insurance company? Thanks for your help!""

""How much should my car insurance be, is there a downpayment?""

I am 16 and i am a boy :) I have good grades but not quite a 3.0 My car is a really old Toyota tercel, Its a v4. I would be going under my moms plan. Thanks :)""

How much (on average) would private health insurance be per month for a family of three?

male 40 y.o., female 36 y.o., and child.""

Should I drop my comprehensive insurance to liability only on my car?

My van is from 1999 and it is paid off. The only thing is I am not confident in my driving skills. I have enough money to buy another car though. I have 130,000 miles on the van. I was going to drive it until it falls apart or starts costing me too much money in repairs.""

What effect does a minor ticket out of state have on insurance rates.?

A few months ago I got a ticket in Maryland, where I go to school, for going the wrong way down a one way street. The ticket was only a small fine and I don't think any point were given. Recently I just got another ticket for making a wrong left turn in New Jersey, where my permanent address is. Normally, my insurance company, geico , would let one ticket slide but I'm not sure if they would even know about the Maryland ticket. I would appreciate any information.""

Behind The Wheel Driver's Test And No Insurance?

Ok so I live in California I'm going in for my behind the wheel drivers test on 8/17/09. My dad just bought a used car for me off a lot (July 31, 2009) to use and it's registered until July 2010. The problem is the car has no insurance. Well I found a quote for insurance online from Progressive for $114.00 down today for six months worth of insurance. Would that besufficientt for the test? I put myself down in the quote, but it's under my dad's name. The coverage only includes Bodily Injury & Damage Liability & Uninsured/Underinsured Motorist Bodily Injury. Is that good insurance? Also since the vehicle was just purchased if I don't have insurance yet could I still take it in for the test since there's a 30 day grace period to get insurance? Please any answers would be helpful. Time is of the essence.""

Do I need auto insurance in this case (I live in Texas)?

I'm looking a the Texas Minimum liability insurance requirements. They have a 30/60/25 policy. $30,000 & $60,000 policy for 1 and two people's medical, and $25,000 for property damage. Well I was interested in investing some money, and I'm absolutely SICK at the interest rates given at any bank or credit union. The best around here is .75% which STINKS! So I was curious if there is any type of insurance surety account. Basically, could I put $85,000 (which would cover 1 or two people's medical, and $25k in property damage into an account that I can't touch? Is there anything like this where I could prove financial responsibility , through a surety account of some type and gain my own insurance card this way? The way I see it, my insurance is currently around $800 a year for liability here. For my $85k investment into a binding surety or insuring account I could save $800 a year. That's like drawing nearly 10% interest in savings!!! LOL! I just wonder if anything like that exists? I mean they call it financial responsibility .... It's not called insurance by law.""

What car insurance should I get?

I just got my first car. Its a 1998 Subaru Legacy L sedan. I need insurance bad, I want to get something good, but inexpensive. I know thats hard to find, but I am on here asking because I don't know what is good and bad in the insurance world. Please help me! Thank you in advance. Heres a few factors that might help. Age:19 Sex:Male I've only had my license under a year. This is my first car The car is automatic, green, and stock.""

How will universial health affect the insurance industry?

How will universial health affect the insurance industry?

A first car for a 16?

i am wanting a 97' Toyota Camry with 150,000 miles on it. It is $4,300 is this a good first car? And how much does insurance on it cost? I also like saturn l200 are they good cars?""

""Does anyone know of any good, affordable dental insurance?""

I am self-employed and I need to see a dentist, can anyone help?""

Jobs that provide insurance?

What is a good job that provides good health insurance to someone right out of high school? I must have insurance because of a health condition, but my insurance runs out when I turn 19...so I have to get a job that gives me insurance before September... I heard that you can take some sort of Parapro test or something and work for the schoolboard...is that true? What are jobs that provide insurance to someone that is still a student? Please help""

Insurance for driving my bf car?

I am getting my driving license, how much roughly will cost the insurance to drive my boyfriend's car? It is an old petrol skoda... Thank you!""

Is the car insurance company right?

I was in my first EVER car accident and it was my fault. I was driving my fiancs car and I wasnt on his insurance, his insurance company said that they wouldnt cover his car because I wasnt on the insurance but they covered the other car and that was the last of it until 6 months later we buy a new car and cancel that insurance and get new insurance for both cars and we added me on it. A few weeks later we get a phone call from the old car insurance company saying we need to pay them back for the other car which was close to 8,000 bucks we asked them why we are just now hearing about this we were never not once told we would have to pay anything and 6 months later you call us and tell us to pay you 8 grand all they had to say was sorry you werent contacted sooner they said they mailed us stuff but we didnt get anything. They mailed us a letter saying what they policy was saying that the reason we have to pay them is because it was a MATERIAL MISS REPRESENTATION we thought something isnt right so we took it to a lawyer and he said it cant be a material mss representation because that mean they wouldnt have covered me if I were on the policy which isnt true because my driving record was PERFECT not one thing wrong with it. They lawyer want 3 grand up front to fight it but we dont know what to do. Is the insurance company right?""

Does anyone know a reliable and affordable car moving company?

I need to transport my car from Wisconsin to California. I would like it to get there safely and not have it break my bank. Has anyone else used a car shipping service that they recommend?

Who has the cheapest auto insurance policies in Pennsylvania?

I'm purchasing a '97 GTI VR6. I don't have insurance, because I currently own no other vehicles. What would everyone recommend as far as a decent and affordable auto insurance policy? I'm 19 years old. No accidents and no tickets of any sort. Thanks in advance!""

How to get cheaper insurance on a Motorcycle?

I'm 24, 25 in 10 days. I have wanted a motorcycle for the longest time, I have rode dirt bikes most of my life. I plan on getting a 600cc bike, but can't understand why the rates are so high. I hear about people who are 18 who are only paying $90. a month but they want to charge me $200.+ I have called around and just would like advice for those who might be paying less for insurance. The bikes I would like are 2006-2009 Yamaha R6/CBR600/GSX 600. Let me know if anyone has one of these and is a new rider and got pretty cheap insurance. I currently have Geico, and even with a clean record and multiple cars they still want a ridiculous amount.""

Insurance company is doing something very very fishy please help?

Ok so I just leased a new car and 4 days after got hit by a drunk driver in the rear end.. he had no insurance and no registration. Cops came and arrested him. I had uninsured but still had to pay a deductible for something not even my fault of doing.   Now after the work has been done on the car I get a call from the underwriting team and they tell me that my information was incorrect when I first created my policy ( I am almost positive it was NOT inccorect) and now they needed to update it with new information ( technically the same damn info we started with) and my rate dropped 20 a month. COOL. NOT.   He then continued to say he requires my old insurance policy from a completely different vehicle to see the coverage on that and that if I dont give it to him in a week my policy will be canceled or I will have to pay 900 next month and 500 following each month WTF! why is it honestly any of there concern what the hell coverage I had on my old beater car? Supposedly if i just had minimum on my beater before that he can raise my rates up really high too with that.   i feel like there just trying to screw me and cut there losses and get rid of me. Is this even legal? I had a set policy in order and everything! You cant just demand 900 dollars for no reason.   I have never heard of this before.

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/car-insurance-ontario-jacob-tate-1/"

[gloriacumming43-blog]

Vegan Activist Put To Shame

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[type2diabetestreatments-blog]

AADE Training: Why Patients Don't Listen to Their Diabetes Educators

New Post has been published on http://type2diabetestreatment.net/diabetes-mellitus/aade-training-why-patients-dont-listen-to-their-diabetes-educators/

AADE Training: Why Patients Don't Listen to Their Diabetes Educators

Ever wonder how diabetes educators are trained to deal with us patients? That's the most intriguing thing for us about covering the American Association of Diabetes Educators annual conference. Out of 15,000 attendees, we could probably count the non-CDE attendees on one hand. Not many actual patients are in attendance, so these CDEs end up talking and learning about "us" in absentia.

One session title that particularly intrigued us was titled "Dealing with Patients Who Just Won't Change." Ack! That didn't sound promising. Was this going to be a rant-session all about how horrible us "noncompliant" patients are? A woe-is-me diatribe about all the ungrateful patients these CDEs have to deal with? I'll admit: I was suspicious. What exactly where these CDEs going to hear about us?

But you know what? I actually liked it. Shocking, right? Keep reading...

Tackling Communication Issues

This session was led by two Michigan-based diabetes educators, the AADE's Educator of the Year, Ann Constance, and her colleague, Cecilia Sauter. The ladies started off with two rather hokey skits to illustrate why patients have such a hard time listening to their CDEs. In the skits, one woman played a "bad" diabetic (high A1c, low activity level, little understanding about their diabetes) and the other woman, a CDE.

"We are the 'experts' in diabetes — so why are they not listening?" Cecilia asked the audience.

The skit was meant to illustrate why patients have difficulty following directions: the PWD character was a recently widowed man who was going out to eat a lot because he wasn't used to cooking. The CDE character asked a barrage of questions and then provided unrealistic recommendations like never going to fast food restaurants. Of course, unrealistic recommendations usually lead to... patients not following through. Which leads to the controversial (and rather derogatory) label "noncompliant." The second skit showed a successful CDE who, of course, actually listened to the patient, taking the person's real lifestyle and concerns into account before suggesting — not ordering — some things to change.

"When our patients feel that we are actually listening, they are more willing in starting to make changes," Cecilia explained. Seems kind of a "duh" statement from my POV, but it was a relief to know that the hundreds of CDEs in the standing-room-only ballroom were hearing it too! "It takes about two minutes for the patient to tell us what concerns them. Otherwise you are just background noise." Uh-huh!

What does that mean for us patients at home? If our CDE (or endo!) isn't listening to us, we have to pipe up! It doesn't do us any good if we feel ignored, belittled or pushed aside. Our educator's job is to help train us to manage our diabetes when they aren't around, so let's make sure that's what they are actually doing.

Goal-Setting and Problem Solving

The presenters here talked about several methods for identifying issues, overcoming challenges and generally helping patients improve their diabetes self-management. Importantly, they noted that identifying how ready a person is to make a change is actually more important than identifying what needs to be changed. In diabetes, there are a ton of tasks to conquer, and any given patient might need help in several areas: testing more often, remembering to take our meds, carb counting, or exercise (or all of the above). All of these are important in diabetes, but not everything can be your immediate priority, right? So CDEs need to help us figure out what will bring us the "bang for our buck" in the short and long-term.

Here's one example recounted: an overweight patient who's told by her endo to lose weight. Her CDE then plans to concentrate on weight loss, but when the patient comes in to see the CDE, she says, "I'd really like to quit smoking." Although this wasn't what the endo recommended, it was a priority for the patient — and also a great health goal. Over the course of a few months, this patient successfully quit smoking, the presenters said. Moral of the story: even if our CDE or endo recommends one thing, we need to speak up for ourselves and realize the areas of our health that we are most committed to and passionate about fixing.

Once a problem is identified, there were several options presented for goal-setting and empowering the patient. One method I particularly liked was the 5 Step Model for Empowerment:

Explore the problem

Clarify Feelings

Develop a plan

Commit to action

Experience and evaluate the plan

It's fairly intuitive, but what I liked was that Cecilia steered away from using the term "goal" when working on changes. She says to call them "experiments." You try something, and if doesn't work, you move on. Sound familiar?

"When an experiment doesn't work, does it mean I'm a bad scientist?" she says. That statement gave me a special kind of hope, not just for the CDEs' sake, but for my own ability to cope with this confounding and frustrating disease. Who says I'm a bad diabetic because I went low during exercise? Or because I went high after trying a new restaurant? Who says I'm a bad diabetic because I have trouble committing to going to the gym? Diabetes is complicated and behavior change is a struggle — not because of us, but because of the disease. Just because something doesn't work does not mean we are failures — it means that what we tried just isn't for us! And — surprise, surprise — everybody is different.

When evaluating a diabetes "experiment," the ladies suggested asking patients the following questions, which I think, in turn, we can simply ask ourselves:

How do you feel about what you accomplished?

What barriers did you learn about?

What support did you learn about?

What did you learn about yourself?

What would you do the same or different next time?

Beyond the Doctor's Office

It was a repeated mantra throughout the entire conference: CDEs need to help patients take care of themselves when the CDEs aren't around. Go figure. Especially because the current ratio of CDEs to patients is one for every 1,517 patients a year. There's no way CDEs could reasonably provide ongoing support to everyone in this country, even if everyone had access and coverage to visit a CDE!

Ann and Cecilia offered up a few "outside" resources, like Weight Watchers meetings that could help facilitate weight loss in a consistent and community-based way.

The only part of the session that had me cringing was what wasn't said. There was absolutely no mention of the Diabetes Online Community, which I thought was slightly ironic considering that session took place just prior. It would have been a perfect continuation of the theme of diabetes support and education.

On the other hand, I was hardly surprised. The DOC is still very suspicious to most CDEs. At the end of the session, I did speak to Cecilia and thank her, and I asked her point-blank how she felt about blogs and the online community. She told me that she thought certain "vetted ones" were very helpful, but there simply wasn't enough time to cover all the resources. Hmm.

Hopefully by next year, the DOC will no longer be an afterthought in resources for patients! What these educators may not realize is that it may be much easier for us to take advice from and get motivated by each other on things like lifestyle changes.

Disclaimer: Content created by the Diabetes Mine team. For more details click here.

Disclaimer

This content is created for Diabetes Mine, a consumer health blog focused on the diabetes community. The content is not medically reviewed and doesn't adhere to Healthline's editorial guidelines. For more information about Healthline's partnership with Diabetes Mine, please click here.

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