#and I'd like to make it not suck
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God I wish there was more on the internet on how to have better relationships with people with certain disorders that didn't demonize the disorder. That isn't helpful, thanks!
#because yes!#both her disorder and my autism making me shit with empathy flavor why this relationship sucks#and I'd like to make it not suck#but that doesn't mean that either of us are bad people#its just competing needs#and I'd like to have her in my life#but holy fuck
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Yes, Greece still exists, we didn't all die 2000 years ago. Yes, people speak Greek. You people are so fucking stupid for real. So many of you claim to love ancient shit but can't even acknowledge the actual living culture of the people whose mythology and classics you romanticize. You keep leaving annoying comments about how you just forget Greek people still exist, thinking you're being quirky because you love ancient stuff soooo much that you forgot about the people it came from. You think about it so little you don't even realize that an actual Greek person has to read this shit, making it clear how little you actually care about the culture beyond the romanticized (and westernized) mythology. Don't claim you love Greece, don't use our mythology anymore if you can't acknowledge that we're still around without making it about how little you think about us. It's mind boggling that you'd think a Greek person would read this and think you're anything but obnoxious. Explode.
#this post is edited because you're all annoying. maybe I'll turn it back someday#it sucks that people can't even be normal about a funny family story once the fact that we're greek comes into the fold#suddenly its all about blorbofied mythology shit and idiots saying ''GREECE IS REAL???? 🤯🤯🤯🤯'' yeah percy j*ckson didnt make it up#maybe it would be less annoying if they weren't all saying it like I'd think it's funny that they don't know we exist instead of like#disturbing on a personal level. like what the fuck#man if you can't acknowledge we exist in real life just name your oc Icarus something else idgaf#so yeah explode. Skase. Voulos'to. Valto mesa sto katamalakismeno mouni tis mana's sou. Psophise. etc.
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do any other artists feel like. yeah you're a 'good artist' because you draw things that look nice, but like. TECHNICALLY? you're really not great
i really hate that i can recognise that yes, my art is good, but is it VARIED? is it dynamic?? is my anatomy good? is it full of texture and colour theory? do i know how to do This? can i do That? no, not really. and that's quite painful actually
#ramble#yes this is the artist's perspective bs and yes this is anxiety because it's 1am#and yes i'm forever learning and growing but also#aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.#drawing my little guys is fun but i am not good enough for the industry right now and that fucking sucks#i really feel like if i walked into a studio with my portfolio right now they would laugh at me#one of those days where i wish i'd done a more useful degree y'know#i'm going back through the phase where i don't know what i'm going to be anymore and it's scary#some days i really want to give it up and never draw again and do something worthwhile because i Know my life would be easier#and i hate that something i love so much makes me feel so hopeless#signs that i should go to bed ^^^^#i will resume my pity party tomorrow
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Partial hand bank for Elias from my files. Some flats and some finished/lit ones, so good stuff with light differences!
#solivaga#my art#pu art#artists on tumblr#hands#art reference#art resources#drawing resources#like a weird fusion of milt kahl and sailor moon hands#he needs to go full Other Mother hands maybe#this is only a small portion of the sheet I have saved for myself to re-use and reference#but thought I'd share it since I was adding some new ones#it sucks not being able to use my own hands as reference#my little rat stubs don't do the trick#also please if you do anything like a comic that's very art heavy#don't be afraid of making and using character banks#it's your own art it's not cheating to compile pieces for reuse or reference#save yourself a ton of time and trouble and just have it around just-incase
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so. so.. Corrupted Rebirth is pretty cool. :3
(if u tag as ship, ur days are numbered, make sure to say goodbye to ur family before ur ass is dust.)
#looket this grumpy baby#killer make himb do a wave hehe#i been brainrotting over this fic#bby nightmare is vry cute#i usually don't like children#but noot can chill#'m only at chapter 9#trying not to get too sucked in n ignore everything i need to draw. but then i jus drew this n nothing else all day :'>#corrupted rebirth#killer sans#nightmare sans#babybones nightmare#dreamtale#undertale#undertale au#didderd art#this killer might b th only dad of a small child that i'd b into LMAO
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important distinction.
Testing a few different things with this one
#I spent straight up 5 hours testing out and trying to use different animation programs and you know what#they all suck all the fun out of it for me. frame by fram 4 ever yaaa#anyways I'm thinking about trying to make like an animated short or something. might get some voice actors and everything#extremely excited thinking about it#however I fucked up super hard and I accidentally overwrote my original file with my reduced size version. so#I only have this like 500px version of this now#so if I were to use this clip I'd have to redo it anyways#but I think I wouldnt? idk. maybe I would. but either way I was just doing this as a test I dont think I'd want the same composition anyway#this is what I am telling myself so I dont get sad losing that file WHWLJGLJGLKSJG I am extremely sad about it but. its okay.#ok anyways#animated gif#2d animation#my art#digital art#ocs#my ocs#time and time again#animated#animation#gif#rough animation#adam#ttawebcomic
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HEAD LIKE A HOLE, BLACK AS YOUR SOUL I'D RATHER DIE THAN GIVE YOU CONTROL
#rvb#red vs blue#felix#isaac gates#felix mcscouty#rvb felix#*24#mine#art#this one's for the felix stans. throwing a few crumbs at you like im feeding pigeons at the park.#i actually did some detailed lineart for his armor. usually i just make blocks/general shapes and fuck it up with a brush lol#1 thing ill say abt felix. his playlist has some fun tunes i can listen to while drawing him#me + felix killing the dancefloor to stray bullet by kmfdm. i am your worst enemy i am your dearest friend malignantly malevolent#< as if i dont get sucked into watching the bao fam while drawing. i'd love to say i'm cool like that but alas. the pandas.
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A hug from him would fix all of my problems I think
Also a bonus drawing trying to replicate the show's style, don't know if I succeeded but it was fun
#this is very self indulgent there's really nothing more to it#also this isn't self shipping#as much as i like to talk abt how hot that old man is i'd probably see him more as a father figure bc i have daddy issues#me 🤝 soos: adopting stan as our dad because our actual dads suck ass#anyways#stan pines#original character#oc#WAIT I JUST REALIZED MY SONA'S EYES MAKE ME LOOK LIKE I'M POSSESSED BY BILL#i bet ford would try to kill me bc of this lol#my art
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collection of tiny guys
#art talks about stuff#vocaloid#fanloid#project diva#not going to specifically tag the game because while the spritesheet these are from is extend's these are both in 2nd/extend#hatsune miku#kagamine rin#kagamine len#megurine luka#kaito#meiko#akita neru#yowane haku#sakine meiko#meiko looks so fucked up because she's the only one with nothing on her arms#anyway been meaning to isolate the non-kaito ones for a while so here's the full set#i'm pretty sure there's also like. snow miku/hachune miku/some specific luka + kaito ones but i'll make a different post if i do them#''barney why don't you just graphically exorcise screenshots of the models'' because i can't get noesis to work yet#i'd have to line up the angle/zoom of them just right and that sounds like it would suck#once i can get the models i will post hi res pictures of them that just won't be rn#spriteposting#id in alt text
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#earn sanitada#orm kornnaphat#tsou#the secret of us#the secret of us the series#oh the kicked puppy look#i actually really like this look#not only the disheveled look because [twirls hair]#(okay why is she so attractive here Idk why)#but I'm saying is I love that Earn having more mode than just the super energetic puppy mode#she's so bubbly chirpy oui oui all the time#I'd love to see more sides of her when she has to face reality that ugh perhaps things kinda sucks sometimes#and her being upset is a strange concept for HER#that makes her more human#I love the idea that she ruminates over her action#perhaps she feels bad for reacting that strongly toward Ratee and she's like 'that isnt like me'#or perhaps she's the kind who takes major hit when she found out that people hate her sometimes#Idk but the idea of Earn ruminating over these things is nice#she's defo a deeply deeply flawed character and I want to see her reflecting on herself
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One thing I think about a lot is that when Nargothrond falls, it is heavily implied that as good as everyone perished or, if not, got captured. Like, unlike with the Fall of Doriath, there is no mention at all of any refugees removing to the Mouth of Sirion - and yet, I assume that is very likely where Celebrimbor, at least, went? I definitely think he would have fought, but clearly he survived and neither Doriath nor Gondolin really were an option for him, and I doubt even more that he would have gone back to his family.
And there are a lot of implications to all that, but maybe the one that keeps me up most is that this means he would have likely been there when the refugees of Doriath arrived, when they told of what his family did. That his father is dead. What would he have been thinking? What would the survivors of Doriath been thinking? Like, I know there were technically several different camps to some extent, but I doubt they would have been wholly separate, especially upon arrival. What kind of horror to find someone who looks just like one of those guys who just slaughtered your friends and family. What kind of horror to look like someone who just committed such horrors.
He also would have been there when the third kinslaying occurred, or at least very close to it. What an experience, to end up on the other side of it. To see exactly what might have become of him had he not foresworn his father years ago, and also to see yet again what became of his family. Like yeah, everything before/during the Nargothrond Disaster would have already been formative for him and his future choices, but I do feel even being in the vicinity of all of that would have been such a dire reinforcement of all those convictions and reasons that made him disavow them in the first place. And especially in terms of the third kinslaying, it's also why I personally really doubt that there is a chance at any kind of reconciliation with any of the brothers, whether it's his father or I don't know, Maedhros or Maglor. Like, I just don't think there is any coming back fromt hat, really, if there ever was.
#*mine#mona's rambling#tolkien#the silmarillion#celebrimbor#feanorians#silm#like i mean obviously you don't need to be affected to realize That Shit Sucked#but can you imagine looking down a sword and seeing your uncle who helped raise you. how do you even BEGIN to process that#there is a whole other matter of tyelpe being in/around the camp that had a silmaril but that's a post for another time lmao#also i mean galadriel - would she have been there after doriath's fall?#I'd assume she would have fought there too so that would make her end up on the other side of a feanorian kinslaying TWICE#like. these are the things that make me want to chew through drywall PLS#did they know elros and elrond before they were taken? what did they think maglor and maedhros would or wouldn't do to them? LIKE#i don't even think there is a solid straight-forward answer to that that's right or wrong i just like bouncing it around my head and going#insane. btw#anyway these tags are a mess don't mind me
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Just a bit of lore relevant vent art (with terrible proportions bc apparently I mess that up horribly when I'm tired ugh. Watch me regret posting this tomorrow. The head size is already driving me mad bc it's too big, and I can feel myself wanting to abort this mission already) of Mourynn just, lying down on top of one of those large elevated Pale Tree roots far above the Grove (and far away from everyone else), and during the time between the early years and before the Personal story. Caithe is gone (Destiny's Edge), Wynne is gone (bc well, y'know...), even Faolain is gone (bc of Caithe in DE), and she's just feeling miserable, lost, and alone. (Her hair is in between her sapling hair and the Zhaitan hair, so it's grown out a bit bc she's depressed, and she's meant to be in the new outfit she designed, but I'm in the process of redesigning it a bit, so I've made a few tentative changes for now. Her collar is now just an extension of her clavicle leaves which can be put up like a collar, or can be draped down over her shoulders or back)
#gw2#sylvari#artgallery#mourynn#mourynn art#I've just been so tired lately bc of work#also just going a bit stir crazy with the silence (lonely; but alas I unfortunately suck at starting convos bc I have nothing interesting t#talk about and work has been draining my social energy; making it even harder :( (I'd rather burn the social energy with friends yknow?)#it's getting a wee bit better; but I haven't had much time or energy to even game while we're in the midst of our busiest season :(#I miss hanging out and chatting with my buds; but the universe insists on keeping us apart :(#just miss having something to look forward to throughout my day. Been trying to fill it with other things; but the depresso is overriding i#Mostly just been me with my thoughts and that is just bad bc I got so many horrors in there lmao.#I wanna at the very least; draw more or game more to distract from it; but work is sapping all my time and energy from it.#but also it's very quiet on my end and it's kicking my overthinking into overdrive so I#Ive just been fighting with my mind lately lmao#hopefully this will all pass soon so I won't obsessively keep thinking about it loll#lol I'd post this in the servers but it's vent art so it feels a bit weird to do; so it's going straight to home video w/o a theater releas#hopefully once work calms down it'll help#(I have so many long shifts makes me so frustrated bc I hate them and I run out of steam half way through)#other than all that I'm doing fine lol. My brain's always been like this; But I usually only get like this during the winter season#(bc of the holidays making everything quiet and also the SAD) so it feels weird having this exact same feeling happen to me in July lol
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I think the reason that MTMTE remains the most defining, influential, and loved series in the IDW1 run is fundamentally because, despite its many flaws, MTMTE has the power to make you think and wonder about the world beyond what's shown on the page. The character relationships are so strongly developed that it's easy to care about the characters and easy to imagine further adventures they could go on. While the myriad dropped plotlines, underwritten/underutilized characters, and worldbuilding with weird implications are all fucking maddening at times... even if it makes you mad, MTMTE makes you mad because you care and it makes you want to immerse yourself into a world that feels like it's real beyond what's explicitly shown to you on the page. It's a sandbox of a story where there's so much fertile ground for pretty much anyone with any preferred character archetype, storyline, etc to dig in.
It's just... immersive. That's the best way I can put it. It feels like it could be real and it makes you want to spend more time in it than the constraints JRO had. It makes you want to know more about it and come up with theories on how/why things function or happen the way they do. That's why it's loved and that's why it's the best series in IDW1.
#squiggposting#the intense focus on character and heart ties into a post on here that said something like#a story with good characters but a bad plot can still be good bc at least you care about the characters#and a story with a good plot but boring characters sucks because you don't care#and i think that's why like. despite barber having ideas (sometimes storylines) of comparable weight to mtmte his shit isn't as widely read#crossovers aside it's bc barber focuses on plot and The Message to the detriment of individual characters and that's why it's a drag to rea#no time is taken to explore side stories or implications. character relationships are underdeveloped or crammed into the margins#or like there's maybe 3 characters that are developed and one of them is arcee (bless btw that's good shit)#when JRO's writing sucks it makes me go 'he could've done X Y or Z. you know what I feel like writing it myself'#when barber's writing sucks it makes me go 'why did i even bother getting invested in this when nothing matters in canon'#or 'was this written to actively spite me as the reader' or 'this is so stupid i literally don't know how i'd fix it'#unfortunately after like 2 years of coping im forced to admit that MTMTE is indeed the best series in idw1 and there's literally no contest#you can't even call it overrated the way ppl focus exclusively on it bc mtmte literally is as good as ppl say it is. better even
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I cannot imagine being a Damian stan right now. You've got both Zdarsky's bullshit (where he clearly doesn't give a shit about your boy) and The Boy Wonder (where Juni Ba clearly gives so many shits about your boy) coming out on the same day. The whiplash must be insane. I hope y'all get some nice warm soup for your efforts jfc
#damian wayne#damian al ghul#damian al ghul wayne#batman#batfamily#for all of the issues that come with having Steph as your fave having too much wild shit happening at once is never one of them#btw I quite like The Boy Wonder Issue 1. wow shocker an artist and writer who I have liked everything they've ever done#has once again written something that I am enjoying with art that makes me want to be part of its world.#it's almost like Juni Ba is really freaking talented or something#like I have some problems with it but it seems like many of those are part of the point. Damian is learning that his siblings are more#three-dimensional than he realized and that is part of this 'coming of age' story merged with fairytale#so I can't be mad at the oversimplistic defining of Dick and Jason and Tim until the conclusion of the series. that might be the point.#I hope that the series will address Steph as a Robin but if not then frankly it's not an issue unique to this series.#I'll be annoyed and disappointed but ultimately roll with it like I am with Babsgirl being here. There's too much good stuff here to get#hung up on shit that seems to be almost an editorial mandate at this point. at least that's where I'm at.#I am also very sorry that Chip Zdarsky is massacring your boy. he has 'X (Tim for him) is the best Robin so everyone else must suck' diseas#where a writer really likes one specific Robin and in trying to uplift them demeans all of the other Robins. instead of like...just writing#for that one character only or alternatively not demeaning the other characters in order to make his blorbo look good#it's wild because I actually think his writing for Tim is pretty solid. but he's not writing a Tim series. he's writing a Batman series.#and if you are going to write a Batman series and include other Batfamily members you need to actually write them well.#instead of assigning them like 2 personality traits while Tim gets to be a whole character#I accept that behavior in fanfic where I have lesser standards because it's fucking free. not a comic run that wants me to pay#tens of dollars in order to understand what the fuck is going on. he's been going for a while now it's gotta be a lot of money.#I can buy Steelworks with that money. I can see John Henry and Natasha Irons in a trade. Fuck you Chip.#it's why it takes such a special person to write a good ensemble story/a good Batfamily story. you have to be good at writing a LOT#of different characters. which I don't think most people are. I sure as hell am not. I can write maybe 3 at a time confidently well.#and you also have to give all of them at least SOME love or else people will be upset that you aren't focusing on their fave#and also the writing as a whole will suffer. Chip Zdarsky is a pretty good Tim writer. I'd maybe read a Tim solo written by him.#I would not read a story focusing on multiple characters that I like written by Chip Zdarsky. because every character who isn't Tim#is at least a bit weak/inconsistent/out of character INCLUDING FUCKING BATMAN. THE NO. 1 GUY MOST ARE HERE FOR
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average prince-fledgling sitting arrangement
#ngl folks. i believe in vampires. bc drawing them actually did suck the life outta me.#this looks like a doujin cover kinda...if i made a doujin about them itd just be them arguing. zero fucking involved#anyway. i'm done w this!!!!!!!!! i'd add the photo ref but i don't feel like doing that. Im so eepy..#cel shaded bc the thought of painting this makes me Want to sleep for weeks.#actually finished this a few days ago hehe it just lived on my drafts for a while. also i know the anatomy is a bit off on jaden...shhh#jaden blackwood#vtm#vtm oc#vampire the masquerade#vtmb#vtm bloodlines#ventrue#vtm ventrue#sebastian lacroix#my art
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my job has had me on forced leave for six months and now i've reached my credit card limit which is the only way i've been able to pay my mortgage this whole time!!! and it fucking sucks!!! it sucks so much!!! i've been applying and applying and applying to other jobs and most of them don't even send back a rejection, i just never hear from them. it's hard not to feel demoralized when most of the time it feels like i'm submitting job applications into some black void of nothingness. i hate doing this, it makes me feel sick, i hate asking for help, i hate when i have no other option but to ask for help. if anyone has anything they can spare, i'd really appreciate it. i don't really know what else to say. everything feels so insurmountable.
p@yp@l - here you go
c@sh@pp - here you go also as well
#*#idk i would just love to not have a general sense of glumness all the time#i'm almost finished with a fic though. for the first time in like. over a year. so that's nice!#i wish my first job hadn't destroyed my spine. i feel like i'd have more options if it hadn't#sucks!!! sucks so much!!! god i hate making posts like this i feel so grimy#also i haven't had any communication from my workplace At All in four months#that communication btw was them emailing oh you can come back to work!! and then when i responded they said oh actually never mind#fucking disgusting company
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