#and I’ve been before and I so so dearly wished I’d enjoyed it
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Eddie would be the ‘mmmm blocking out the haters’ vine of the boy with spoons over his eyes
#one more day then it’s Friday baybieeeee#said I’d go to my brothers dnd/gaming club on Saturday because it’s an open day#and I’ve been before and I so so dearly wished I’d enjoyed it#but I don’t feel comfy with the people to fully engage in the rp aspects also don’t believe I can#ALSO cannot do board games etc because any sort of competition makes me want to run away#idk just thinking out loud welcome to my boring weekend plans of going to a thing for half and hour#I’ve also got a pre baby party on the same day#idk this isn’t important I’m just brain souping after a long day#with patients who were NOT happy#oh well life goes on!!!!#hope you all have a Good Friday when it comes!!!
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the letter ꕥ higuruma hiromi
summary: reader writes a letter for an absentee. one that she will never send.
tags: f!reader, implied past relationship, higuruma x reader, angst, break up, longing and general heartbreak.
wc: 1k
notes etc.: this is actually my original style of writing in my native language before i began writing in 2nd(?) + 3rd person pov on ao3 and tumblr this year. it’s different from what I’ve written so far, but I hope you guys enjoy it. the style translation was hard, holy shirt. song → shake it out (florence + the machine).
ꕥ collection of stories: "jujutsu partners au" → masterlist
i like to keep my issues drawn ꕥ it’s always darkest before the dawn
I was debating if I should start this with “hey, Hiromi”, “hi, Higuruma”, “dear” something, and I still haven’t arrived at an answer. The first sounds too casual for what we have become — and what are we now if not strangers? The second, however, is just too impersonal, and I don’t need such a stinging reminder of how much I’m not entitled to your first name anymore. At last, “dear” to start a letter is just tacky.
Alas, I digress.
I don’t quite know what possessed me to pick up a pen and a piece of paper (analogical, just like you’ve noted me to be) to blurt out the swirling hurts in my mind, but I guess I still had a lot to say, even if you weren’t here long enough to hear it.
Here goes nothing.
You might be wondering how I’m doing (at least I hope so), so I thought I’d let you know.
Tonight, more specifically, I’ve been for an insurmountable stretch of time — were it hours? Minutes? Days? Out of my priorities, tracking time has not been one of them — staring at the empty vacuum making its presence known by my side. It seems to mock my stare, that longs, against all odds, for a miracle — for you to simply materialize right there, out of thin air.
Seriously, you should see the mess you’ve made when you left.
You left an emptiness of shoes, black suits, wet towels on the bed, cup marks on the furniture, scratches of morning beard, warm legs under the covers — an emptiness of body that has been giving me nightmares. You came in, flipped everything upside down, blew up my walls and made so that every edge, vertex, color and smell of this heart and bones surrounding our leftover life would incessantly scream for you.
It’s like my misery extended beyond myself and resoundingly expanded against the walls of this house.
But… even though I wish you were here with every tiny part of myself, I couldn’t ask for you to stay. I know it wouldn’t be fair. You’d never ask me to betray myself, and the least I could do was to love you in the same earnest way.
You wouldn’t be the man I loved if you didn’t go. I wouldn’t be the person you loved if I asked you not to (I apologize for the past tense, it’s one of those truthless comforts I’ve decided to give myself for the time being).
You still linger here, though. I still keep your gaze close to my chest, your face pressed against my skin, your warm voice caressing the edge of my ear and your hair stroking through my fingers, even if it’s just my soul pretending for a minute.
A long minute.
You know, it has been hell without you here. The couch cushions wrap around me like your arms, the bed always bounces by the time you used to get up, and the kitchen smells like your favorite take-out meals (because God knows we’d set fire to this building if we so much as dared turning that stove top on). The window reflects two back at me when only one is looking at it, and my hiking boots are dearly missing those black oxford shoes. My coat hanging on the edge of the closet is also dearly missing your crumpled black ties sprinkled around the room (of course you took weeks to properly wash and organize them — when you ever did).
Oh, and the bed.
The bed is just not the same without that stupid, ridiculous blotch of water your towel would always leave on it.
A huge chunk of our house is missing.
I know I can’t let my selfishness kidnap you from what you need to do — and I do know you need it. But damn, sometimes it’s hard to fight the urge of hopping on the first train your way, grabbing you by your wrist and asking you to become once again part of my wallpaper, my duvet, my pillows. Just promise me you’ll make all of this pain worthwhile, even if you ran away with ten thirds of me.
Ever since you left, though, I learned a few tricks to mask your ever so present absence. I can pull the pillows towards the middle of the bed, eat in the living room and read in the kitchen, being sure to slowly put all my pieces back in place.
It’s harder to notice an empty chair across the table when you willingly choose to sit on the ground.
However, I didn’t want to do that. Not today. Call it insanity, clarity, or just meet me in my madness like you always so kindly did.
Today, I wanted to let you invade me, come into my house with my full permission and go on turning everything upside down once more. That way, I can almost feel you there. To me, at least for now, that’s good enough (or as good as I know it’s gonna get).
Your muted way of sharing our space could be so, so silent. That quietude brought me the deepest of peaces.
Unfortunately, I never anticipated the silence from your absence would be so loud, and not peaceful at all. It has been hammering at my breathless heart for days.
I miss you.
I love you, too.
***
With a sigh, you put the pen down and stared at the paper sheet for a minute, your own calligraphy so foreign with a pain you hadn’t let out properly ever since Hiromi… actually, Higuruma stepped out that morning.
Considering your options, you resigned, and pulled the letter in a crinkled messy ball, tossing it in the garbage can.
No need to talk to a voluntary absentee. No need to bother him, either.
You got yourself back up and picked up two pairs of keys, the blue buttoned shirt and made your way out of the apartment, not failing to hear the rumbling echo the door made when it slammed closed.
An echo that only happens in truly empty places.
#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#higuruma hiromi#jjk higuruma#jjk imagines#Jjk angst#jjk drabbles#jjk hurt/comfort#hiromi higuruma x reader#higuruma#higuruma x reader#jujutsu kaisen higuruma#higuruma smut#jjk hiromi#hiromi x reader#hiromi jjk#higuruma hiromi x you#higuruma hiromi x reader#hiromi x you#hiromi x y/n#higuruma x you#higuruma x y/n#jjk x you#jjk x y/n#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x you#jujutsu kaisen x reader
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A Lion in the Garden -Tywin Lannister x Reader- (Part 30)
WARNING: NSFW/Mentions of sex
A/N: AHH alright, so I'm kind of losing it. It's genuinely hard to believe that A Lion in the Garden is over, or at least plot wise anyways. Because yes, I am going to go back and edit, along with adding new chapters into the main plotline to help with pacing and all that, but this is the end of Lady Tyrell and Tywin’s story and it is honestly making me emotional. I started this story in late November, and in the last six months I’ve written about 170,000 words about these two, which is around 300 pages the way that I have it formatted in google docs. So, needless to say, this has been quite the journey for me and also for all of you who have been reading as I publish. And a giant thank you to everyone who’s shown support for my story, because even when I was busy or lacking motivation, knowing that there were at least a few people desperate for the next chapter made me keep working, and now I’m here. Anyways, with all that said, please enjoy the last chapter and know that I am so grateful for all my readers <3
���————
To finally be in the tower of the hand was a blessing. I had spent no less than three hours in the great hall, and if I’d been stuck there any longer I might’ve gone mad. Thankfully, Tywin knew me well enough to know that my patience was wearing thin, and had distracted a few lords so I could slip away.
It was about 10:00 when I made it back to our chambers, and instantly I collapsed on one of the sofas in Tywin’s bedroom, removing my shoes with a sigh. I massaged my feet and ankles, tired after quite literally standing still for hours on end. If I had been walking the whole time it would’ve been fine, but it was like I had been stuck.
“King Tywin Lannister…” I muttered to myself, getting up from the sofa and going over to the mirror. I could’ve rang for Cerella, but it was late, and the last thing I wanted was to be rude. In all honesty, I wasn’t sure I could tolerate a conversation right now. All I wanted was to let my hair down, remove my gown, and fall asleep.
No, that wasn’t all I wanted. I wanted Tywin beside me too.
But he probably wouldn’t have the chance to join me until much later, and I couldn’t wait for him. Sighing, I grabbed at the pins in my hair, taking them out and running my fingers through it afterwards. It had not relieved my headache as much as I had hoped.
I reached backward then, watching myself in the mirror as I undid my dress. I suddenly wished that Tywin had dressed me in red this morning, for at least I could’ve felt connected to him that way. The entire day—though not purposefully, of course—he had been so distant, and now all I wanted was to feel like he was with me.
My dress fell to the floor, and I undid the rest of my unnecessary undergarments with a sigh of relief. I turned to go towards the dresser and find a nightgown, but I noticed that one had already been laid out on a chair. I was unable to hold back a smile, grabbing my gown and other undergarments from the floor and folding them as neatly as I could. Cerella had known me well enough to understand that I wouldn’t want to speak to anybody at this hour, and so she had set out my nightgown in advance. Gods, I loved her.
I set my clothes down on the chair, taking the nightgown in my hands once I had and slipping into it. I found that I dearly missed the warm nights that Tywin and I had spent nude, lazily sprawled out under the thin silk sheets. The nights had become colder, and soon the days would too. After that, it would only be a matter of time before the ravens came from the citadel. Then the blankets and furs on our bed would pile, and I would press myself closer against him. Perhaps that was not so unfortunate.
I slipped into bed, pulling the blanket up to the bottom of my neck and finding a comfortable position. I settled into the mattress with a sigh, my head sinking into the pillow with a sort of relief. It was odd, however, to be falling asleep without Tywin by my side. The bed felt too light without him, and I wondered if I would be able to sleep without the sound of his breathing beside me.
King Tywin Lannister.
Everytime I found myself drifting off, that came back to me. It was still such a shocking concept, and I wanted it to feel normal more than anything. For some reason, though, I simply couldn’t make it sound correct. Queen (Y/N) Tyrell.
A small shiver went up my back, and I had to turn onto my other side in bed. I kept hoping for the sound of Tywin’s boots outside the door, but they would not come. It was almost funny to me, how much comfort was derived from a man that plenty of people considered an insufferable cunt. Myself included, let it be known.
And yet still, I felt restless without him. I had a million questions to ask, and a million reassurances I wished to receive. Although, I guessed he was worse off than I was, probably surrounded by far too many noblemen… and noblewomen.
Now I was lying on my back, a sort of jealousy sparking in me and making my body go hot. Never before had I ever felt that somebody would try and disrupt my relationship with Tywin, but if he was to be king, surely the title of queen looked appealing to many ladies. Just as I was certain the concept of birthing little princes and princesses did.
Would Tywin want children now? His relationship with Tyrion had improved, yes, but would he go so far as to put him on the throne? I wondered if that was better or worse than Casterly Rock. But that was only for a moment, because the idea of heirs was most important. I knew for certain that the titles of prince and princess had not changed my feelings, but sometimes Tywin was hard to predict. Although, if I hadn’t been so tired and my head not so clouded, I would’ve known instantly that his opinion upon the subject had not changed.
Eventually, this train of thought became so tiring that it no longer made sense, and the words in my head were not coherent any longer, especially as I had turned back onto my side and closed my eyes once more. My breathing had begun to slow as well, and slowly but surely I drifted off.
In my dreams, I was on the battlefield. I somehow knew that Tywin was there, but I did not see him. The other odd thing was that it had been snowing, and it was somewhat reminiscent of Winterfell. It was unlike any battle I'd ever been in.
—————
Tywin was utterly exhausted. He had been in constant discussion ever since you’d left the hall, and it was now approaching 2:00 in the morning. He was making his way up the tower of the hand, already grasping at the top of his coat and undoing the clips. It was unlike him to undress anywhere besides his chambers, but gods he couldn’t help it.
All he wanted was to slip into bed beside your warm body and hold you close, because just as you needed his support, he needed yours. He was not an overly emotional person, but he could admit that to feel you in his arms would relieve the unbearable amount of stress he had accumulated in the last 24 hours. He had single handedly made House Lannister the most powerful and placed them on the throne; it was truly a wonder.
Tywin did not bother looking at the guards outside his door when he entered his office, he only pushed the door open with a slight sigh and carefully shut it behind him. It wouldn’t have been enough to wake you up regardless, but it was so quiet that he did not want to disturb the silence.
He fully shrugged off his coat now, draping it over his arm as he went towards the bedroom door. That one was handled carefully too, opened and closed as softly as was possible. There were a few dim candles lit, but overall the room was quite dark. He could see you, though, lying in bed with your face turned toward the door.
The candles were behind you for the most part, and it gave your figure a pleasant outline. Although, your face was partly buried in the pillow, and an odd feeling of guilt ran through Tywin. Had you been crying?
He took light steps across the room, placing his coat down on the same chair that you had left your gown. He sat down in another, reaching down to pull off his boots with a soft groan. Once he had done that, he untucked his shirt from his pants and then continued to strip. Tywin found his black robe in the dresser and promptly slipped it over his head, periodically looking over to make sure you were still asleep.
Entirely ready to sleep now, he approached your side of the bed. He lifted his hand to your face, the back of his fingers brushing against your cheek. It did not feel as though you had been crying, but it was impossible to tell. He felt the pillowcase too, and was reassured by the dryness there. No, you had not been crying.
Quietly, Tywin made his way around the bed until he reached his side, carefully lifting the blankets and getting in with as little disruption as was possible. You seemed relatively undisturbed by the shifting of the mattress, and he knew he had not woken you. Tywin laid on his back with a quiet sigh, feeling utterly relieved to finally be in bed and alone. It felt like being alone, at least, for your company was never disruptive to him.
He had been drifting to sleep, but was suddenly startled by a jolting beside him. When Tywin opened his eyes, he saw you shake beside him. He moved to reach over and hold you, but you had shot straight up with a gasp, and he could see a sort of fear in your eyes.
“(Y/N)? Are you alright?” He asked, having to clear his throat as he sat up and placed his hands on your arms. You looked over at him—as if processing that he was there—and then nodded. Something had clearly started you. “A bad dream?” he questioned, gently cupping your cheek and bringing your forehead to his lips.
“Yes, y-yes. It was just a bad dream,” you whispered in reply, swallowing. The way you said it gave the odd impression that you were trying to remind yourself of it, not that you were telling Tywin. He gave you a sympathetic look, though you did not notice.
“Come, sweet girl. Let us sleep,” Tywin whispered, slowly coaxing you back down to the mattress. He sighed out airily when you moved closer to him, wrapping your arms around his torso. He could feel your stress and uncertainty being relieved as you held him, and he could not keep himself from holding you with the same ferocity.
Tywin clutched at you, wrapping his arms entirely around you and pressing you to his body as much as was physically possible. He knew he wouldn’t, but there was an odd desire in him to sob. He did not want to be the king, all he wanted was to remain here with you.
“Oh Tywin…” you muttered, inhaling his scent with an overwhelming sense of comfort. Your own scent was simultaneously giving him the same feeling. You had begun to nuzzle into him, too, much as a lion would. In response, his hand had come to your hair, cupping your head as one does for an infant. It had come from some sort of protective instinct, and even knowing that there was nothing to fear, Tywin would not let go.
His queen.
With both of you feeling utterly at peace in each other's arms, it did not take long to fall asleep. You had drifted off first, and the sound of your tired breathing had sent Tywin to sleep right after you. He had been so glad to hold you, and perhaps even a bit happy that you were tired and disoriented, for you had asked no questions. Those would come in the morning, he knew.
Tywin would happily answer them then, but for now, all he wanted was sleep. And with you wrapped up in his arms, that was no strenuous task at all.
—————
Tywin had woken up before me, though he had not left our bed. When I opened my eyes, I understood that I was cuddled against his chest. However, when I looked up at his face, he was already smiling down at me.
“Goodmorning, my dear,” he said, his voice a bit deeper and harsher than usual. He must’ve not been up for long. I smiled, adjusting myself and sitting up slightly before reaching over to kiss him. Tywin gave a soft hum against my lips, hand coming to my hair as he kissed me back. The mornings that he got to stay in bed with me were always the best ones.
“Goodmorning, Tywin. What time did you come to bed last night?” I questioned, laying back down and resting my head on his shoulder. I felt his hand lifting my nightgown, and then suddenly his warm palm against my hip. He loved to feel the skin there, for some odd reason. Though, I would never complain, for I loved it too.
“Far too late. I only managed to escape the great hall at 2:00. Your nightmare woke up just after I came to bed,” he said, resting his chin on my head. I furrowed my eyebrows, as I did not remember waking from my dreams. I had experienced a nightmare, yes, but waking up because of it? I certainly could not recall that. Well, it was of no importance.
“I see. If you’d really wanted to, you would’ve left much earlier,” I said, knowing him better than that. Tywin Lannister would never do something he didn’t want to. At least not something like that.
“It would have been inappropriate.”
“Oh yes, I’m certain.”
I laughed, shaking my head at how ridiculous my husband managed to be. I suspected not a man like him had ever lived, nor ever would again. It was almost comical, for Tywin Lannister was rarer than a dragon.
“We have much to discuss,” Tywin said after a moment, instantly making my smile fade. I could hear in his voice that he similarly did not want to, but felt it necessary. He was right, of course.
“Yes, we certainly do.”
“What’s most important to me, (Y/N), is that you’re alright. You shook during the ceremony yesterday. It’s all been somewhat overwhelming and sudden, hasn’t it?” He asked softly, one of his hands reaching for mine and holding it. I nodded, sighing out and glancing around the room.
“I suppose I- well, I hadn’t even considered that you had a claim. For some reason, the only two I had suspected were Jaime and Tyrion, and when I heard men in the hall discussing that it ought to be you, it did shock me. But it’s not you being king which frightens me, it’s the idea of me being queen. I’m nothing like my sister in that regard,” I admitted, suddenly finding one of the tapestries on the wall to be the most interesting thing I’d ever seen. Tywin had it put up after our wedding, and I hadn’t really taken any appropriate amount of time to consider it. There was something so beautiful and erotic about the nude figures, and it was a perfect distraction from my embarrassment.
Tywin suddenly moved beside me, and I realized he wanted to get up from bed. I moved off him, sitting up and watching him quizzically as he went over to a drawer and rummaged around. When he seemingly did not find what he was looking for there, he left the room. I simply waited, absolutely puzzled as to what he was doing. I assumed that like always, he was trying to prove a point.
He came back in with a rather large, rolled up parchment in his hands. He set it down on the table, undoing it and then using books that were already on the table to keep it open. Tywin then turned around and motioned for me to come over. I did so, scooting off the edge of the bed and adjusting my nightgown as I walked over to him.
He had laid out a map on the table, and after a minute it clicked in my head. It was a map of King’s Landing. I raised both eyebrows at him as a signal to explain, knowing he was going to come to a point eventually.
“As you are aware, the smallfolk of King’s Landing are not entirely fond of me. If I’m to be their king, my reforms must actually have a directly positive impact on their lives. Tell me, how do I improve a city ripe with crime, disease, overcrowding, and homelessness?” Tywin questioned, gesturing to the map he had laid out. I let out a breath that was almost a laugh, feeling that the question was impossible. Staring at the map was not helping me any.
“You cannot improve all of those things single handedly, Tywin. Therefore, I cannot possibly have any ideas that would do such a thing,” I said, knowing that we needed to be realistic in this instance. He still hadn’t come to his point yet, and it was irking me.
“It’s not single handedly, I have you. But even if I didn’t, that’s not what I mean. Give me a solution to just one of those problems, please,” he said, gazing down at me with a sort of twinkle in his eye. Where was he going with this? I looked at him hesitantly for a moment, but when all I received was an expectant look I knew he was serious.
With a sigh, I turned my eyes to the map once more. Gods, the layout of Kings Landing was absolutely horrendous. It was no wonder that overcrowding was a problem just based on the way that everything was structured. And of course, overcrowding led to disease, so I supposed a solution to the overcrowding would perhaps help that as well. The idea came to me then.
“Tywin, where was Tommen’s carriage destroyed?” I asked, turning to my husband for a moment. His expression was blank, but he pointed down to a certain street on the map.
“Right around here.”
“Well surely that much wildfire must’ve destroyed some of the street and the buildings around it, right?” I questioned, feeling that it must’ve been a completely logical assumption.
“Correct. I was told that these complexes here are practically ruins now, and several of the common folk in them were either seriously injured or killed,” Tywin informed, making my heart sink a bit. To think a religious order had caused such suffering.
“I see. We ought to make sure their families are provided for at the very least, and given reassurances that the sparrows will be held responsible,” I muttered, hearing Tywin give a hum of approval beside me.
“I’ll have Varys see to that.”
“Perhaps I ought to go with him. It will appear more genuine that way. Plus, then I can inspect the site myself. The problem with Kings Landing is that it wasn't built with any particular layout, but if we can slowly rebuild with a more thought out design, then it would be able to more adequately house the smallfolk, and if there’s less overcrowding, that also means less ability for disease to spread. Sickness is bound to spread in large cities, but if we could limit the amount of families living in one house, that ought to help,” I reasoned, continually looking down at the sheet before me and trying to formulate some kind of design in my head based off of what I knew about Highgarden’s layout. Though, King’s Landing was admittedly a much different space.
“And how do you propose we go about building such a thing? To redesign and rebuild the entire city is quite a hefty task. It would displace many,” Tywin pointed out, though I shook my head in disagreement.
“Not if we do it slowly. We could also use the sept to house people, there aren’t any more nobles in need of a marriage that grand so far as I’m concerned. And as we carry it out, we could also hire the smallfolk to help build. It would improve our economy significantly and reduce the amount of unemployed and homeless, especially because the new layout would ideally use the space available most efficiently. I’m no architect or city planner, but I’m certain we could find somebody from the citadel who would be more than helpful with that matter. We ought to focus on agriculture as well, especially with the upcoming winter. It will remain relatively warm enough to plant certain crops, and it would certainly relieve a burden off of Highgarden. Plus, the more jobs available the better,” I rambled, thinking of the endless benefits that redesigning and rebuilding King’s Landing would have. If we could execute it correctly, which I was certain we could, it would be infinitely useful.
When Tywin said nothing, I looked over my shoulder at him. I had leaned over the table subconsciously, both hands spread on the map like I was planning for battle. My husband was smiling rather fondly, and I raised a curious eyebrow. What on earth was making him grin like such a fool?
“A few years ago, (Y/N), when I saw you for the first time since you were 14, I had not a clue what to expect. For a moment, I thought you had remained as immature as you were as a young girl, but you quickly proved me wrong. You had leaned over my table then, just as you are now, and told me that we would be stupid to go through that ravine, because if Stannis sent men in another direction and they realized we were coming, we would’ve been easy to repel. You were admittedly correct, and I understood that you were no longer an inexperienced child. Now you stand here, telling me exactly how we ought to earn the respect of the smallfolk and more than that, how it will be beneficial for all involved. You underestimate yourself, (Y/N), and of all my concerns, you being a good queen is not one of them. You have always been a leader, that won’t change just because the title sounds more intimidating,” Tywin explained, stepping toward me and cupping my face in his hands. My lips parted as I stared up at him, my heart somehow pounding in my chest at the sentiment he was expressing. There was something so indescribable about the way that Tywin managed to reassure me, and I often wondered how it was possible.
I reached for the fabric of his robe, pulling him closer to me and lifting my head up to show him I wished for a kiss. He chuckled softly, moving his hands from my face and grabbing my hips instead. Tywin bent down, pressing his lips to mine with a noise of satisfaction.
“You’re far too good at that,” I whispered when he pulled away, making his eyebrow raise.
“What, kissing you?”
“No. Well, yes, that too. But I meant that you’re far too good at reassuring me. I’m always in my head and you always know how to pull me out,” I said with a smile, unable to look away from my husband for even a moment. Even after all this time I was still so smitten with him.
“It’s because you often do the same for me, even if you don’t realize it,” he remarked with a kiss to my forehead.
“And speaking of, well, reassurances… the subject of succession, your succession, I mean… do you- are you still firm on the subject of children?” I asked, knowing that was one of the other things I needed to discuss with him.
“Yes, I am. Why? Has the prospect of them being a prince or princess changed your opinion on it?” He questioned in reply, a certain hesitation in his voice as he asked it, almost as if hoping that mentioning he hadn’t changed his mind wasn’t the wrong thing to say.
“No! Gods, no. I just- I wasn’t sure if… well I don’t know. Your relationship with Tyrion has certainly improved, but I didn’t have a clue if it had improved enough to make you give him the throne. You were already unsure about giving him Casterly Rock,” I pointed out, watching him nod as he listened to what I was saying. He was contemplative.
“Casterly Rock must have prestige associated with it. Jaime is no ruler, but he would not make the Lannister name an embarrassment. To have Tyrion there, whoring and drinking constantly, would be a problem. The throne has no obligations, it is expected for kings to drink and whore. Tyrion will get the throne once I am gone, and I feel quite certain he will rule far better than most,” Tywin explained, one of his hands holding mine and the other on the table, gently tapping against the wood. He quite frequently fidgeted with his fingers, I realized. I wondered if somehow it helped him process his thoughts.
“I see. That’s easily settled then,” I remarked, somewhat glad it had been resolved so easily. I had expected a much longer conversation, but I was quite satisfied. Tyrion would be a good king.
“Yes, it is.”
I thought for a moment more, and then an insecurity from the previous night came back to me. I found myself looking down, not wanting to see Tywin’s reaction as I said what was on my mind.
“You’re correct, Tywin. Kings certainly are expected to whore, drink, and hunt,” I mumbled, feeling insanely uncomfortable with the jealousy I was experiencing. Surely every woman in the seven kingdoms would be throwing herself at him now.
“(Y/N), a crown is not suddenly going to transform me. Just like any other man, I have been with whores, and I have enjoyed them, but you are my wife. I had no need to marry you, House Tyrell was already firmly tied to House Lannister. I married you because I love you, and that means I have no intentions of being unfaithful. I would hang any woman who tried to flirt with me, because I will not see our marriage insulted that way. Rest assured that you are the only woman I want, and that is not going to change just because they decided to put me on the throne,” Tywin assured me, hand coming under my chin and forcing me to look at him. He was entirely genuine, I could see it in his eyes. In all honesty, I knew everything he said was true before he had even bothered to open his mouth, but somehow hearing it outloud brought such relief.
“I merely hate the thought of women looking at you with desire.”
“And now you understand how I feel. Perhaps you’ll stop teasing so much when I get possessive.”
I laughed then, shaking my head and embracing Tywin. There was always something so lovely about knowing I was the only person with whom he acted this way. His hands were on my hips again, and when he gave them a slight squeeze I knew exactly what he was about to say.
“And believe me, none of those whores are anything like you. It left me rather unsatisfied,” he whispered, which had initially been what I expected. Then I was given quite the surprise.
“Unsatisfied?” I questioned, wondering if he was insinuating what I thought he was. He observed me for a second, as though he were debating whether or not he ought to admit something.
“About two years ago, when you left to go make negotiations with Robb Stark, I sent a description to the brothel. At that point, I was unaware that you returned my feelings. We hadn’t even kissed yet, but you were driving me mad. It was impulsive of me to do, and I felt incredibly guilty afterwards… but I- well, I couldn’t even finish with her. From behind, she certainly looked similar. Your same height, hair color, skin tone… but she wasn’t anything like you. She did not hold herself with any confidence, the sound of her voice was wrong. She did not moan how you would’ve, and when I leaned down her scent was nothing like yours. That’s when I had to stop. I paid her and asked her to leave. She wasn’t you…” he said, revealing what was probably the most shocking thing I had ever heard him say. I was trying to process my feelings, but in all honesty I had no idea what to feel. How are you supposed to feel about learning that a man fucked a whore with you in mind? More than anything, I was just surprised. I hadn’t even considered that Tywin desired me at that point in time.
“Tywin…” I whispered, not sure what else to say. It was the only thing that would escape my throat. Should I be offended that he had done it? Should I be flattered? There certainly was something erotic about the idea that I had driven him so mad with lust he had gone so far as to find a whore that looked like me. But at the same time, I hated the idea of him fucking another woman. He was mine. Although, as he had said, that was exactly why he’d stopped. She wasn’t me.
“You had been in my room in the last day or two. We had discussed something, I don’t remember what, but you had sat on my bed. You’d been fidgeting with the lace on one of the pillows, I remember that much. You left your scent on it, and that night… when I realized…” he trailed off, and it seemed that just the memory of it had sparked lust in him. I swallowed, instantly understanding. Yes, I was decided. That was utterly erotic.
Suddenly I was picturing Tywin naked, laying in bed that night with a sort of disappointment that the whore had not fulfilled his desire for me. I imagined him turning over and suddenly inhaling a familiar scent. He would flare his nostrils a few times, discovering that something smelled just like me. He would check the pillows around him, and then he would find the one that I had left my perfume on. Tywin would proceed to inhale deeply, and the lust would spark in him again. He’d reach down, touching himself as the scent consumed him entirely and he shut his eyes.
I came back to the present after picturing that, and I felt the heat in my cheeks. To think of Tywin in such a context was entirely new, but I found that I liked it.
“Until that night, I hadn’t been with a whore since weeks before the Battle of Blackwater. Once I had spoken to you again, (Y/N), you became my only desire. You called me an insufferable cunt, fine, I would prove you otherwise. Nobody had ever dared to say such a thing, and what had piqued my interest was that I knew you did not mean it just to be insulting, it was genuinely what you thought of me. When I wasn’t working, I was thinking of you. And when those thoughts became different in their nature, I did what I thought would satisfy the urge. No. No, it most certainly did not. I couldn’t have anything less than you, I discovered. Nothing ever has and nothing ever will compare to you, (Y/N).”
I felt my heart pounding with his words, so overwhelming was the love inside of me. Suddenly I could not keep myself off of my husband. I instantly kissed him, grabbing at his hair and moaning into his mouth. He did the same in response, and every touch was so raw and genuine. He lifted me from the ground then, letting me wrap my legs around his waist as he took me over to the bed.
He sat me on the edge of the mattress, standing between my legs as his lips grasped at mine. Gods, it wasn’t even 9:00 yet and we were already like this. His hands had come to my thighs, and he had to pull away for a moment, absolutely breathless.
“(Y/N)… (Y/N)…” he muttered, pressing his forehead to mine. I cupped his cheeks, swallowing and catching my own breath.
“I love you, Tywin… I love you so much,” I whispered, smiling slightly and looking into his eyes. He also smiled softly, removing his hands from my thighs and embracing me instead. It seemed that we were both equally emotional and lust-filled.
“I love you far more than I ought to, (Y/N). My queen… my Nightshade of the Garden… my wife,” he said softly, tucking some of my hair behind my ear. He kissed me again, softer this time. I responded the exact same way.
It was an interesting thought, that I truly had no idea what would come next for us. I found that I did not care, for it did not matter. Tywin and I would continue on, just as we always did.
—————
“You look very handsome, your grace. The sash fits well.”
“It’s not your grace just yet, Cerella. And he does look handsome, even if perhaps a bit gloomy.”
I was fixing up Tywin’s outfit for the coronation, and he had decided on his black coat with the lions on the shoulders. On top of that, I had fixed a golden sash around his torso, as I was trying to prevent him from looking too plain.
“I do not appreciate your jokes,” Tywin mumbled, which only made me smile even more as I adjusted his belt. He was simply so easy to tease.
“Have you ever considered taking the black, husband? I feel confident they would allow you to keep your wardrobe,” I jested further, finally stepping away from him and feeling satisfied with his appearance. Cerella had brought in my own dress and was presently waiting for me to strip out of my nightgown.
“Ha! If I did, it would leave you begging,” he replied snarkily, only continuing to grin when I smacked his arm.
“Do you hear him, Cerella? My husband is surely the most insufferable cunt in all seven kingdoms,” I scoffed, undoing some of the lace on my nightgown and pulling it over my head. My undergarments had followed, of course, and Tywin had pretended not to notice my nudity as he ran a hand over his hair in the mirror.
“Here, my lady,” Cerella replied, handing me a fresh set to put on. She had not addressed my claim, but was smiling in a way that told me she appreciated the joke. I supposed that after serving the two of us for so long, she’d been forced to become accustomed to our constant teasing and yapping.
I pulled on the clean undergarments, and I held still as she assisted me with the lacing of my stay. After that came my gown, of course, which was a deep scarlet red. The top had minimal gold and white detail, for on top of my dress I was wearing a beautiful porcelain corset. It had absolute gorgeous ornamentation, with perfected gold detailing along the edges and roses painted on it. It had been a gift for my 24th name day, and I hadn’t found an occasion for it until now.
“You look absolutely stunning, my lady,” Cerella said as she helped me put it on. I smiled at her for a moment, and then I smiled at my reflection in the mirror. It certainly was quite the sight. Cerella had done my hair beforehand too, wanting to make sure that everything would stay in place.
“Yes, she does. You’re breathtaking, wife,” Tywin noted, coming up behind me and placing his hands on my hips, just below the corset. I hadn’t even realized he was watching, in all honesty.
“Well, my husband is being made into the king of all seven kingdoms today. If that isn’t a good occasion to be wearing this, I don’t know what is,” I remarked, watching Cerella step back and take my dirty nightclothes out. Tywin and I were left alone after a moment.
“I have something to give you, (Y/N). I’m not certain what jewelry you were planning to wear, but I think you ought to consider this.”
I watched him retrieve a flat, square box from his dresser with a small smirk on his face. I was suspicious of him, just as I always was. Tywin brought it over to me, and I turned to face him with a raised eyebrow. Carefully, he opened the case and revealed an absolutely stunning necklace. It made me gape, and I quite honestly had no clue what to say in reply.
“What do you think?” he questioned, lifting his gaze from the jewelry up to me. I managed to avert my eyes too, though with quite some difficulty.
“It’s gorgeous, Tywin. Would you- would you help me put it on?” I asked softly, watching the satisfaction settle in his eyes. He said nothing, but nodded and motioned for me to turn around. I did so, watching him move around in the mirror and remove the necklace from its case. I adjusted my hair as he came up behind me, and I could feel his breath against my ear as he hung the thing from my neck. I felt the gentle clasp of it, and he carefully removed his hands. For such a gorgeous, detailed necklace, it was not nearly as heavy as I had suspected. I put my hair back in place with a sort of entrancement.
“It looks beautiful on you,” Tywin said after a moment, still standing right behind me and admiring my reflection. Carefully, he wrapped his arms around my waist and let his head lean against mine.
“I think this would look beautiful on anyone, Tywin. Maybe even on you,” I jested, though there was no humor in my voice. Something about seeing myself this way was shocking, and I could not tear my eyes away. I looked like a queen.
“No, I doubt that. I had it specifically made for you, the measurements are specific. You are the only woman who’s ever been meant to wear it,” he said, his voice low and clear. I placed my hands on top of his, swallowing and then letting my lips part with a sort of overwhelmed feeling.
“I wonder, Tywin, if you will ever stop spoiling me like a child,” I remarked, finally looking at him. As well as I could, anyways, for our faces were rather close.
“I have never spoiled you like a child. I have spoiled you like a wife—as you deserve,” he replied, placing a chaste kiss against my neck. I leaned into him, a sort of warmth filling me. To think this man had been my worst enemy a few years ago was incredibly odd, for now he was the most important person in my life. To think that a cut, a sword, and a set of armor might’ve changed my life forever.
There was a knock at our door which I recognized as Cerella’s, and I knew it must be time for us to leave. I moved myself from Tywin’s grasp, though I took his arm once I had. From there, we made our way out of the tower of the hand and down to the throne room. The walk was quiet, but the entire time Tywin kept me close. Occasionally, he would look over at me and hold my gaze for a few moments before looking away. I wondered if perhaps he was trying to make sure I was still there, as stupid as that sounded.
When we reached the double doors, I felt him take a deep breath and noticed his gaze set firmly on the wood in front of us. I pressed my lips together, blinking a few times as I debated whether or not I should ask him how he was doing. I decided it would do little harm.
“Are you alright, Tywin?”
“Of course.”
It was kurt, and perhaps a bit sharper than he had intended. He was stressed, I understood. He was not easily made this way, either, and I felt awful. The man standing beside me was not only Tywin, he was the king. In this moment, the second identity had to be worn.
“I did not mean to use such a tone,” he said after a minute or so, finally looking at me. There was the husband again.
“It’s alright, Tywin. You don’t need to apologize. Not today,” I whispered, giving him a sympathetic look. A sort of relief settled in his face, as though he was at least glad I was not upset by what he had said. I had learned Tywin well enough to know it was not truly him.
Slowly, the double doors were pulled open and the two of us were shown to the entire court. My heart skipped a beat, as if I was suddenly processing that we both were on public display. With a swallow, I stepped forward in sync with Tywin, looking straight ahead in spite of my nerves and desire to observe every face. Margaery would inform me of looks afterwards, I was certain.
There was a silence in the room as Tywin and I walked through the isle, heading straight up to the throne. It was almost like a moment of peace, a moment of time that nobody else existed in. I found that I could not resist the urge to look at Tywin, and even despite his appearance as king today, he looked back at me. Oh, and those eyes. Those blue, blue eyes with their green flecks. I loved this man so much.
We reached the platform then, and together we ascended up the steps. I made eye contact with Kevan, who Tywin had chosen as Hand of the King, for he never wanted politics to cause strife in our marriage. Although, both of us were aware that I would continue to be his most trusted source of guidance and advice. And, it was a good thing Kevan was hand too, for I did not want to relinquish our chambers in the tower and he had no problem whatsoever taking the kings instead. The bed was bigger in there, but Tywin and I had no problem sleeping close together.
It was Kevan who I had expected to stand beside at the ceremony, too, but Tywin did not drop his arm. With an open mouth, I found myself standing in front of the throne with him, and there was a smug look on his face.
“Let them see that the queen has every bit of power that the king does. Your title is owed a crown,” he whispered before we turned around to look upon the crowd. I was still somewhat shocked, but I did not let it show as we faced everyone.
Tywin’s arm detached from mine then, but he then opted to grab my hand instead. He was certainly full of surprises today, and I could not keep myself from giving a subtle smile when his hand squeezed mine.
The high septon was behind us, and once Tywin and I had settled in, he began with the ceremonials. I—in all honesty—was not listening to what he was saying whatsoever. Tywin had been running his thumb up and down the side of my hand for the last several minutes, and that was all I could focus on. That and the two crowns I had noticed in the corner of my eye. One was much larger, and had the face of a lion upon it. The other was about the size of my head, and was covered in thorns and roses.
The high septon had been going on about the seven blessing and guiding Tywin for at least 10 minutes now, and I hadn’t really processed what was being said until I was mentioned. It was not something that had ever been said in a coronation before, at least as far as I was concerned, and Tywin had given me the most fulfilled of looks when he’d heard it.
“And may his lady wife support him in all his endeavors and be a pillar of strength in the crown. May she show love, compassion, and kindness to all in the kingdoms, and lead just as bravely as the man beside her. The Queen (Y/N) Tyrell, long may she reign,” he said, placing the golden crown of roses atop my head. Its weight was pleasant, and the echo of ‘long may she reign’ from everyone in the hall sent a slight shiver up my spine. Tywin squeezed my hand once more.
After that, the High Septon moved on to Tywin, and I was unable to remove my eyes from my husband. He looked every bit the king, standing tall with his perfect posture and elegant coat. The High Septon held the crown above his head, and with a shout of ‘long may he reign,’ it was placed upon his head.
“Long may he reign,” I repeated with the rest of the crowd, smiling at the sight of the golden lion upon Tywin’s white hair. It matched the blonde strands that remained on the edges of his head and his cheeks.
Loud applause filled the room for King Tywin, first of his name, and I experienced the sort of feeling that one gets before battle. The feeling of rallying your men, of hearing them cheer as they prepare to die for you. Would these men fight for my husband? Would they die for him? I would.
Tywin looked over at me then, and when our eyes met I knew everything would be alright, somehow. There were trials to come, I knew, but it was impossible to feel frightened when the man beside me was looking at me the way he was. Tywin and I had faced everything together for the last few years, and I had no doubt in my mind that we would continue to do so now.
“My Queen,” Tywin muttered, lifting our hands and kissing the back of mine. It was as if he had forgotten everyone in the hall was there, even as their applause continued to ring in our ears. I smiled even more now, looking up at my husband with utter adoration. Every choice I’d made in my life had been the right one, for I could not imagine living without this man. The Great Lion of the Rock and the Nightshade of the Garden.
Tywin Lannister, I could say confidently, was the most important thing in my life. The man I trusted, guided, received guidance from. But most importantly he was the man I loved. They said that Westeros had not seen a match such as ours in centuries, if ever. And standing beside Tywin in front of the throne, his hand in mine and our eyes stuck on each other, I had the odd sensation that they never would again. For how could they?
I could not imagine another tale such as ours, with the hatred of him in my youth turning to eventual friendship in my adulthood, and then that friendship eventually turning to love. Tywin and I had fought wars together, settled conflict together, and kept all seven kingdoms intact together. What other couple could boast that? None. None could. There were no couples like us. There were no people like us. There was only us.
My thoughts were interrupted by the feeling of Tywin’s hand at my waist, and I realized that he was pulling me towards him. Before all present in the hall, he kissed me. Tywin was passionate, and yet simultaneously loving. I could not resist the urge to smile as I kissed back, the sensation of his familiar lips causing a wave of utter contentment to wash over me. A sense of peace. When Tywin pulled away, he smiled at me. It wasn’t even a small smile, it was genuine and raw. And I could see in his eyes, it was not the crown atop his head that had made him smile. It had been me, standing right beside him as the High Septon had placed it atop his head. I kissed him once more, with not a single care as I did so.
For they would never see our like again.
TAGLIST:
@cheyxfu @lemonscoffee @groovy-lady
@ladysindar @vesta-ro @exo-nova @paola-carter
@prettykinkysoul
@fullmoonshadowwrites @kishie8
@the-desilittle-bird @dianilaws @girlonfireice
@muscari-fae @lostgirllulu
@abigfanofgameofthrones @smalltownbigheart
@frombloodandflesh @supernaturalismyreligion666
@thanyatargaryen @rey26 @hexandale @pkawaiidesu5394 @aimsro
#tywin lannister#tywin lannister x reader#game of thrones#game of thrones x reader#house lannister#charles dance#tywin x reader#asoiaf#a lion in the garden
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hello love! i hope this question isn't too personal/straightforward (if it is, please just ignore it, there's no pressure to answer it!)
I just wanted to ask how you found out that you're aromantic? I thought I was asexual for a long time (turns out I am not at all) but I still wonder if I'm aromantic sometimes... I have never been in a relationship either and don't really have an urge to change that but I do find myself longing for physical contact once in a while?
sorry, this got kinda long, i hope you have a great day and take good care of yourself! 🩵
Trying to make Alastor display more romantic tendencies and struggling because I’m just writing down my own confusion on the subject 🫠
let’s get real on main, ya’ll!
It’s really hard to pin down being aromantic, because you’re trying to identify a feeling you don’t have. Like entering a very lovely room and living there your whole life, and then someone walks in one day and says, “We took out one item before you moved in. What item is it?”
There’s nothing missing from my room, as far as I can tell?? The fuck do you mean??! Yes I see my neighbor has a salad bowl but I’ve not once needed a salad bowl and honestly I’ve never enjoyed a salad in my goddamn life. Never had a meal and thought, “know what this needs? A salad.”
‧˚₊꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷‧₊˚⊹
Researching Aro/Ace spectrum for writing tipped me off, because I kept googling “What makes someone aromantic” and getting frustrated, “Yes yes but what differentiates them from people like me??”
and then all these memories bubbled up in my mind
❥When everyone began dating in middle school, I said to my mother, “I have friends, I’m too young for sex. Why would I date?”
Because I didn’t know there was something else people got out of dating.
❥I would have crushes on people, and they’d asked me out, and I’d be so confused. No no—- I—- no, I just have a crush on you. I didn’t realize “crush” meant something different for them.
❥My sister lamented her best friend and her began having sex, and she wished they could have a relationship. I was so confused— fucking your best friend? That’s a relationship minus the titles. Again, didn’t realize there was more people experience.
❥What’s a romantic dinner? My friend listed all these things— alone, dancing close, looking into each others eyes, holding hands, deepening that connection. My dumbass said, “candles.”
❥If someone tried to maintain eye contact during sex and start talking to me about love, I’d kick them in the neck. The idea of someone looking at me longingly, trying to “make love”, makes my skin crawl.
❥Even now, if you ask me, “What’s the difference between your partner and your best friend? Why date person A but not person B?” Well person A is the person I’m sexually attracted to, my penultimate best friend, and I don’t get tired of their presence. I love them both dearly, truly love them. But I don’t (can’t?) feel a different love for my partner than I do my friends. It’s the same feeling for me.
I can’t help you figure it out, but I hope you find yourself happy to be as you are whichever label fits. I tried to give lots of examples of how my aromanticism appears in my life, hoping maybe you and relate to any of it. 🥺💖
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Y.O.U (Years Of Us), Chapter 2: “Gotta do what I gotta do”.
Jimin x half black/half Korean OC
Genre/Rating: 21+, established relationship, idol!AU, smut, angst, and fluff
Summary: Kamaria gives Jimin an answer to his question. Kamaria and Nari have a conversation that only best friends can have with each other.
Warnings: A passing mention of a drug overdose and mention of rehab.
WC: 2.1K
Author’s Note: The songs mentioned in this series are, of course, real life songs but for the sake of the story, we’re gonna pretend as if they’re not lol! Hope you enjoy it!
Song Of The Chapter: Michael Jackson- You Rock My World
8 YEARS AGO
Once Jimin’s debut solo album, Here I Am, along with the accompanying title track ‘You Rock My World’ that Kamaria had starred in the music video for came out, the response was astronomical. Jimin found himself shattering every record that seemed to exist for a solo artist and Kamaria found herself dealing with the newfound fame of having both a number one film and staring in the music video to a number one song and album at the same time.
As a way of thanking her for her involvement in the music video, Jimin had gotten in touch with Kamaria’s manager, Nari, to invite her out to dinner.
“Well, well, well,” Kamaria smiled as Jimin breezed through the front doors of Ryunique. “I would’ve been fashionably late too, had I known we were doing that.”
“Sorry,” Jimin apologized sheepishly. “Everything has just been so crazy since the album came out, I’ve barely been able to breathe.”
“I was joking, Jimin,” she laughed and after a beat of silence, Jimin found himself laughing as well. After the owner of Ryunique, Ryujin, showed them to their table, they quickly ordered their food and drinks before falling into casual conversation.
“So, I invited you out tonight because I wanted to thank you,” Jimin began. “In all the reviews of the music video, people are mentioning how you made it more than just a typical video with your dance skills and your charisma.”
“Well, it was only possible for me to do that because the song is that good,” Kamaria responded.
“And I wanted to thank you for that too,” he added. “For some reason, when you told me that you knew the song and album would be a hit....I believed you and you turned out to be right.”
“Music is in my blood.”
“Speaking of that, I didn’t know that Choi Sora was your mother and that Quincy Jacobs is your father,” Jimin mentioned. “Though now that I’m seeing you again, I want to slap myself because you look just like her.”
“Yeahhh, wish I could say that I haven’t heard that all my life,” Kamaria joked.
“You don’t like to talk about her?”
“Given the fact that for most people, she’s almost as well known for overdosing as she is for being an icon in Kpop?” She laughed bitterly. “Not really.” An awkward silence fell over the two of them then, Jimin not having expected that reaction from her.
“I’m sorry,” he murmured and Kamaria sighed heavily.
“You don’t have to be sorry, I didn’t mean to snap like that,” she told him. “She’s my mom and I love her dearly but I want to be known for my gift more than just being her daughter.”
“I understand that,” Jimin nodded. “That’s why I chose to do my solo debut now, so that I can establish an identity outside of Bangtan.”
“You’ve definitely done that,” Kamaria smiled, making Jimin do the same.
“So, what are you going to do now? Another film? TV shows?”
“What makes you think I have anything planned?”
“Please,” Jimin snickered. “You’re signed to SM Entertainment and if I know anything about them, they’re always looking for a way to capitalize off any hint of success.”
“This is true,” she admitted with a giggle. “I actually had a meeting today about my next album. They’re giving me about a month to write some material and then I go into the studio.”
“Well, since you helped me out, I’d love to return the favor,” he offered. “I have a duet that I scrapped from my album. Maybe you could take a look at it and tweak it to your liking?”
“That sounds amazing. One condition, though.”
“What’s that?”
“That you tweak it with me and we record it together,” Kamaria said and Jimin chuckled.
“I’d love to.”
..............................................
An asshole. A wide, gaping asshole that had been fucked with the force of a thousand elephant dicks.
That’s exactly what Jimin looked and sounded like right now.
“Bubs?” Jimin called, reaching out and snapping his fingers in front of Kamaria’s face. “Did you hear me?”
She couldn’t believe the audacity and gall of the man sitting in front of her, having the nerve to fucking ask her to-
“D-did you just ask me t-to,-”
“Be my surrogate, yes,” he confirmed.
“Are you clinically fucking insane?!” She spat and Jimin instantly shushed her, glancing around himself to make sure that none of the people sitting at the tables around them had heard her. “Do not shush me right now, bitch!”
“Stop yelling,” he hissed.
“I cannot have a baby with you,” she shot back. “You’re married, even if you don’t want to be! You can’t go off and have a baby with your ex-girlfriend! What the hell do you think Hye-ja is gonna say when she finds out that you chose me?”
“Well, Hye-ja doesn’t even know that you and I dated for three years,” he revealed. “So in her mind, you’d just be helping me out because you’re a close friend, which is what everyone thinks about us anyways.”
“Everyone else thinking that is different,” Kamaria sighed. “When we were together, we made the joint decision to keep our relationship a secret. You don’t think that you wanting me to have your child necessitates you telling your wife about what we had?”
“No because I know how she’d react.”
“She’d react like any woman with a fucking backbone would!” She exclaimed. “She’d be rightfully pissed that her husband of less than six months went out and asked his ex-girlfriend to carry his child!”
“She kept the fact that she didn’t want children from me, even after I explained her to that I did when we were still dating,” Jimin explained. “So I think it’s fair if I keep this to myself.”
“I swear, you turn into the most spiteful man on the face of the planet when you don’t get what you want,” Kamaria chuckled as she set her elbows on the table and ran her hands through her hair. “You’re 33 years old and the best solution your brain could up with in response to your wife not wanting to have kids was to have me be your fucking surrogate?”
“Bubs, come on,” Jimin pleaded. “You’re the only person that I can see myself having children with.”
“You’re so full of shit,” she snapped. “You obviously didn’t feel that way when you married Hye-ja.”
“Unless you really want to have that conversation with me, then you should stop while you’re ahead.”
“Fine. Here’s a question for you though: did you really think I was going to agree to having a child with you and not have any ties to it?” Kamaria questioned. “Because that’s what surrogacy implies.”
“No, we’d share custody but we can figure all that out once you’re actually pregnant,” Jimin said.
“Oh, I’m not agreeing,” she clarified with a laugh. “I’m just trying to understand your fucked way of thinking. Another thing, how was I supposed to get pregnant? Because I’m a lot of things but a homewrecker isn’t one of them.”
“Ha, 21 year old Kamaria would disagree with you,” he laughed and she rolled her eyes at the situation that he was referencing.
“Mina was a bitch and she deserved it but that’s not the point,” she huffed. “Look, I don’t know what the fuck is up with you but if you think I’m going to have a baby with you just so you can take it home to the bitch that you married to essentially get back at me, then you’re sadly fucking mistaken.”
“Bubs,” Jimin said, gasping when Kamaria got up from her seat so abruptly that the table shook, causing her wine glass to topple over. “Kamaria, please.”
“You know, just when I think you can’t get anymore fucking selfish, you always prove me wrong,” Kamaria spat before turning around and storming out of the restaurant. Ignoring all of the camera flashes, she shielded her face until her bodyguard opened the car door for her and she was able to get inside.
“How could I be so stupid?” She chastised herself as she leaned back against her seat, her bodyguard pulling away from the curb and into the streets.
Well, that was a waste of a good ass dress.
..............................................
“I think you should do it,” Nari shrugged and Kamaria snorted loudly. The two of them were in the living room of Kamaria’s penthouse, enjoying their weekly movie night complete with wine, popcorn, and chocolates.
“He’s married, Nari,” Kamaria reminded her.
“If he had to come and ask his ex-girlfriend to carry his child, clearly it’s not going that well,” Nari pointed out.
“He’s the one that married her out of spite,” Kamaria replied. “I am not going to save Jimin’s ass, once again, because he made yet another decision that he didn’t think through. It’s about time his impulsivity bit him in the ass.”
“But he loves you and had you not rejected him, you would’ve been the one he married instead of her.”
“I couldn’t!” Kamaria whined. “He had just gotten out of rehab, Nari!”
“That’s bullshit and you know it as well as I do,” Nari replied calmly. “You and Jimin were together for three years, as soon as he got back from his enlistment, and he asked you to marry him at least as many times as that. Hell, he probably asked you more than that because that man loves you. Now, I’m not saying you didn’t have valid reasons to turn him down because you did but the relationship between the two of you wasn’t all bad, either.”
“It’s easier if I act like it was,” Kamaria murmured as she picked up her glass of white wine. “It helps the fact that he went off and married someone else hurt less.”
“I know sweetie,” she sighed, reaching over and grabbing Kamaria’s free hand in hers. “And I know how much you were hurt by what he did to you.”
“You were there so of course you know,” Kamaria chuckled ruefully, making Nari laugh.
“I was,” she nodded as she reached up and wiped the tears that had begun to fall from her best friend’s eyes. “But I also know what the two of you had and how he felt about you; Hell, how he still feels about you. He texts me at least once a week and asks how you’re doing.”
“What?” Kamaria gasped. That was news to her.
“He asked me to not tell you because he knew you were angry with him but he was still concerned about you,” Nari explained. “Now, what you said before was right. His impulsivity is a downfall for him, it’s true and it’s gotten him into a relationship that he didn’t think through but think about it. Jimin’s one of the biggest stars in the world who could have any woman carry his child if he chose to but he wants you.”
“And that’s supposed to make me feel warm and fuzzy on the inside?”
“No but it should remind you of what you two had,” Nari replied. “Who does he have in his will?”
“Me,” Kamaria sighed.
“Who is his mother leaving her expensive china to when she passes?”
“Me,” Kamaria echoed.
“And who is the woman that he wrote an entire album of songs for?”
“Me,” Kamaria finished.
“One last question,” Nari said. “Can you genuinely see yourself ever having children with someone who isn’t Jimin?” And that had Kamaria retreating into her mind for a few seconds. While Jimin hadn’t been her first boyfriend or even the first man she had given herself to, he was her first love and the love they had shared was unlike anything she had ever experienced in her life.
The man had his faults, many of which Kamaria was intimately familiar with but the thought of creating a family with someone who wasn’t Jimin had never entered her mind. Even know, when her heart was aching from his betrayal and she wanted nothing more than to gauge his eyes out and feed them to him, it was still him.
It was always going to be, at least in some part of her disjointed heart.
“No,” Kamaria finally admitted.
“I know it’s unconventional but it might be worth it to think it over,” Nari shrugged.
“I can’t, at least not right now,” Kamaria shook her head. “I have to get through promo for ‘Taming’ and then I want to get back into the studio to finish the album.”
“Oh speaking of promo, you have that in depth interview next week,” Nari told her. “It’s your first one since Jimin got married so what are you going to say if they ask about him and you?”
“The same thing I’ve been saying for the last eight years anytime they ask about us,” she shrugged. “We’re friends and that’s all we’ve ever been.”
“Given everything that’s happened though, you think you’re gonna be able to lie like that?”
“I have no choice,” Kamaria replied with a shrug. “Just gotta do what I gotta do.”
..............................................
Tag List: @dunixxd @namaslaylife @shabbamadapot
#bts#bangtanarmynet#bangtanbathhouse#bts jimin#jimin x reader#jimin x oc#park jimin#bts x reader#bts x oc#jimin smut#jimin angst#jimin fluff#bts reactions#bts imagines#bts jin#bts rm#bts namjoon#bts suga#bts yoongi#bts jhope#bts hoseok#bts taehyung#bts v#bts jungkook
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Apologies, Dr. Jones Ch.2 An addition for Zahara’s birthday!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY @zaharadessert !!!! I’m sorry I didn’t wish you a happy birthday while you were awake, but I hope you’ll forgive me when you read this little addition to last years gift! I love you dearly, my friend, and hope you had a wonderful day!
So when I ended the fic last year with “The End” I obviously didn’t think I’d be adding more to it. Oh well, I guess I lied. Hope y’all don’t mind! Enjoy and I’d love to know what you think!
All the love and thanks to @jrob64 for her super fast beta skills. I’ve been working on this all afternoon, ON Zahara’s birthday, no less, and Joni stepped up to the plate and hit a home run! Thank you so much, babe!
Summary: Originally from the post by @lifeinahole27 :
How do I explain to my professor that the reason I didn't show up to class is because in my dream I woke up and checked my email and saw that class was canceled and I believed it?
This new chapter picks up after the semester is over and Emma and Killian can finally go on an official date.
Rating: M (smut)
Words: Almost 3400 of 7255.
Tags: Teacher-Student Relationship, No Power Dynamic Issues, Consensual Sex, Smut
On ao3 From the beginning/ New chapter
New tag list! Please let me know if you’d like to be added or removed.
@jrob64 @teamhook @winterbaby89 @hollyethecurious @xarandomdreamx @undercaffinatednightmare @the-darkdragonfly @stahlop @superchocovian @pirateprincessofpizza @tiganasummertree @anmylica @cosette141 @motherkatereloyshipper @zaharadessert @jonesfandomfanatic @ultraluckycatnd @jennjenn615 @allons-y-to-hogwarts-713 @kymbersmith-90 @booksteaandtoomuchtv @wistfulcynic @mie779 @snowbellewells @lfh1226-linda @aprilqueen84 @whimsicallyenchantedrose @pirateherokillian @elfiola @ilovemesomekillianjones @justanother-unluckysoul @poptart-cat-78 @myfearless-love @goforlaunchcee @searchingwardrobes @gingerpolyglot @gingerchangeling @djlbg @cocohook38 @cs-rylie @thisonesatellite @donteattheappleshook @deckerstarblanche @veryverynotgoodwrites @wefoundloveunderthelight @fleurdepetite
Under the cut, unless Tumblr ate it.
Killian stood at the door of Emma’s apartment, his nerves making him fidget slightly as he waited for her to answer the door. The semester was finally over- he had never endured a longer semester either as a student or professor- and to celebrate, he was taking Emma out on a long anticipated, first official date.
He wanted everything to be perfect. The time he’d spent with her the last five weeks of the semester, clandestinely of course, had only cemented in his own heart and mind his esteem for the extraordinary young woman he was blessed to be courting. It was much too soon to be thinking very far into the future, but he had to admit falling into daydreams occasionally, of a happy future with the woman he had no doubt he was already deeply in love with.
His musings were abruptly brought to a halt as the door before him opened. Killian caught his breath as the object of his thoughts was fully revealed.
He snapped his jaw shut and shook his head slightly. “You look stunning, Swan,” he breathed, holding out a single red rose. Her hair was gathered into a high ponytail, exposing the graceful curve of her neck and leaving her creamy skin on full display. The dress she wore was a lovely pale pink that draped gracefully down to her knees, the fitted bodice modest with a sweetheart neckline that showed just a hint of cleavage, which had Killian smirking at what he knew lay hidden underneath. She appeared to be a little gobsmacked as well at his appearance, her jaw hanging open slightly and a small gasp escaping her lips. His smirk broadened into a full smile as he waited for her to find her words.
“You look…” She trailed away, her eyes sweeping over him appreciatively from top to bottom.
“I know,” he said, his smirk reappearing as she appeared unable to continue. She took the rose from his hand and rolled her eyes at his cheek, before inviting him in while she put the rose in a small vase.
A wolf whistle caught his attention from the back of the apartment as Ruby made an appearance.
“Hi, Dr. Jones,” she greeted him. “You sure do clean up nice.”
Killian chuckled. “You can dispense with the ‘Dr.’ Miss Lucas. Now that the semester is over and Emma and I can be open with our relationship, I hope you’ll call me Killian.”
She grinned good naturedly. “I’ll be glad to, Killian. As long as you call me Ruby,” she said with a wink. He nodded as Emma returned to the room. He held his arm out to her to take and ushered her toward the door after she’d looped her hand into the crook of his elbow. “Have fun, you two, and I won’t be expecting you back tonight, Emma,” Ruby told them, her brows waggling suggestively. Killian felt his cheeks heat as he cut his eyes toward Emma to see a lovely blush coloring her cheeks as well.
They left the apartment and walked out to the street, where Killian opened the passenger door of his classic SS Chevelle for Emma. Once she was seated, he closed the door and moved to the other side, taking his place behind the wheel.
Emma took his hand as he fired up the car and smiled at him, biting her lower lip.
“I’m so happy we’re finally able to go out together, Killian,” she said.
He turned toward her and smiled gently. “Me too, love.” His eyes turned back to the road before he continued. “I have to admit, I thought it’d never get here. But now we can be open with our relationship, and I couldn’t be happier.” He raised the hand he held to his lips and brushed them against her knuckles.
“So where are we going?” she asked.
“I know how much you like foreign fare, so I’ve made reservations at Marco’s,” he informed her.
Emma gasped. Marco’s was one of the most expensive restaurants in town and she’d never been there for exactly that reason, even though she’d heard nothing but rave reviews since it had opened last spring. Her college student bank account wouldn’t allow for that kind of splurge. But her college professor boyfriend obviously thought she was worth the extravagance. She leaned over and kissed his cheek.
“And then maybe take dessert back to your place?” she asked coyly. She hadn’t been to his apartment in the time they’d been together. They didn’t want to risk anyone finding out about them, so their meetings had been limited to his office after hours, or the often deserted corners of the research floor of the library.
He smirked at her and his eyes darkened with lust, making a shiver run down her spine. “A fine idea, love,” he agreed.
It was only a few minutes later that they arrived at the restaurant. Killian jumped out and hurried to open the car door for her.
“You don’t have to open the door for me, you know,” she chastised him, lightly.
Killian didn’t take offense at her teasing tone and offered her a smirk in return. “But I distinctly remember telling you that I am always a gentleman. And if I’m not mistaken, I’ve proved that many times over.”
His last words were nearly a whisper against the bare skin of her shoulder as he opened the door of the restaurant. A shiver of anticipation raced along her skin, making gooseflesh rise.
Once they were seated, conversation flowed easily. Admittedly, their interactions the last month had been much more carnal in nature, acting on their desire all too easily, given the danger of possible repercussions inherent in their relationship. Now, with the pressure of secrecy removed from them, they could take the time to actually develop a mental and emotional attachment, in addition to the physical one.
But that didn’t mean they even tried to rein in their desire. Light and teasing touches were exchanged throughout the meal in between heated and lingering glances. It was all Emma could do to finish the cannelloni on her plate. Just Killian’s eyes roaming over her was setting her on fire, and if they didn’t leave soon, she was sure she’d spontaneously combust right there in the middle of the restaurant.
“That was delicious,” Killian said, leaning back in his chair. But it only took a moment for his gaze to settle on her and his eyes to darken with need. “But I can think of something else I’d like to feast on.” His raised eyebrow and the sultry smile he sent her had her heart beating triple time and set her cheeks aflame. He was the most gorgeous and sexiest man on the planet. And he was hers.
“Me too.” She looked up at him from under her lashes and smirked as she watched him squirm.
“Minx,” he growled, signaling their waiter for the bill.
Once it was taken care of, he ushered her out the door and back to his vehicle. Before he could turn the car on, Emma pounced, not wanting to wait however long it would take to drive to his place. It was a tight fit behind the wheel, and not exactly comfortable, but surely they could have a few minutes to make out in the darkened parking lot.
His touch blazed along her skin and Emma was in imminent danger of throwing caution to the wind and pulling him into the backseat to have her wicked way with him. Pulling back breathlessly, she touched her forehead to his.
“We should probably stop, love,” he breathed into the space between them, squeezing her thigh gently where she was straddled over his lap, “before I can’t stop.” Emma giggled at how his thoughts had taken a similar direction as her own. She pursed her lips into a pout before she carefully climbed off of him, not wanting to hit the horn inadvertently, and settled in her seat.
It didn’t take long to arrive at his townhome near campus, and he all but chased her to the back door, caging her between his arms when she realized the door was locked and turned to face him.
“I’ve caught you now, Swan,” he murmured before capturing her lips with his. His hands roamed up and down her sides, as he swallowed down her breathy moans. She met his passion with her own, one hand plunging into his hair while the other held him close. When air became a necessity, he broke away and unlocked the door behind her, opening it and allowing her to enter before him. He took her hand and led her through the kitchen to the stairs that faced the front door.
“Kitchen, hallway, half-bath, den,” he murmured, pointing out the rooms they passed on their way to the stairs. Once they reached the second floor, he gathered her in his arms and pointed at three closed doors behind them. “Two more bedrooms and a bathroom. And this…” he said, as he reached around her and opened the door directly behind her, “is my bedroom.” His whisper was husky in her ear and Emma couldn’t stop the smile that lit up her face as she pulled him back into a passionate kiss.
He backed her into the room, their lips still fused together. Emma hadn’t had much of a chance to look around his home, but just from the time she’d spent in his office in the last month, she knew him to be very neat and orderly. It was fortunate, because Emma knew she didn’t need to worry about tripping over anything on the floor, like they might have if they were in her bedroom instead of his. Her legs suddenly hit the edge of his bed. It was tall, hitting her just under her ass. She was going to have to jump a bit to be able to sit down on it. But she needn’t have worried about that either, because just at that moment, Killian reached down and lifted her into his arms before lightly tossing her onto the mattress.
Emma couldn’t help the giggle that escaped her lips as she landed. She caught her lower lip between her teeth as she watched Killian climb up beside her, his eyes ablaze with predatory intent.
“I’ve thought about this for far too long, Swan,” he growled as he reached her. “Imagining you laid out for me on my bed like a banquet.” She reached up and gathered him to her, falling back onto the softest mattress she’d ever laid on.
He kissed her breathless before moving from her lips to her jaw and down the slope of her neck, sucking a mark into the soft skin there. Emma writhed beneath him as he touched and kissed her and began seeking out bare skin underneath the layers of clothing he wore. She got his waistcoat opened and then the dark shirt underneath. Burying her fingers in the hair on his chest, she delighted in the shiver that ran through him as she traced the muscles of his torso.
“You are so beautiful,” she breathed. Killian laughed and raised himself up from her.
“Men are generally not referred to as beautiful, darling,” he informed her, a delighted grin on his face.
She couldn’t help but smile back. “Maybe not,” she conceded, brushing his hair away from his face, “but you are beautiful to me.”
The grin on his face softened into wonder as he stared into her eyes. “You are beautiful to me, too.”
He lowered his lips to hers again and gently coaxed them open. There was no need now for the quick and furious lovemaking they’d been partaking of the last several weeks. They had all the time in the world. She wasn’t expected home tonight and he was in this for the long haul. He was hers as long as he lived.
Reaching behind her, he slowly lowered the zipper of her dress. He couldn’t see the skin his action revealed, but he could feel it- the soft and silky smoothness he’d become very familiar with over the past month. He ran his hands up and down, drawing the dress over her hips and down her legs, enjoying the sight of the skin being revealed. He followed the path of the dress with his lips. When he got to her ankles, he rose from the bed and wrenched off his shirt and waistcoat. His fingers trembled as he unbuttoned his jeans and removed them and his boxer briefs before climbing back up on the bed. He reached over Emma and turned on the lamp on the nightstand. The soft glow from the light made her skin appear luminescent and Killian could hardly breathe. There were no words to do her beauty justice.
Emma reached for her lover and wrapped her fingers around his hardened length. Killian’s eyes rolled back in his head as she began to stroke him.
“Emma, stop,” he begged. “I can’t stand it. This will be over before it even starts if you don’t stop, my love. And for this first time together freely, in my bed, I want to come inside you.” His gaze met hers, full of passion and desire and Emma wondered if he was even aware of what he’d just said. Surely he didn’t mean he actually… loved her. Could he?
She nodded slowly and drew him back down into the cradle of her thighs. They were separated now by only the barest piece of lace covering her most intimate place. She was glad she’d chosen the dress she had. It had a built in bra that made for one less piece of clothing to be removed, before they could enjoy each other fully.
Killian reached down and began pulling off the offensive fabric that had the audacity to hide her from his sight. He tossed it over his shoulder and moved up, inhaling the redolence of her desire for him.
“You smell divine, love,” he murmured, before his tongue flicked out to taste.
Emma writhed above him as he feasted like a man starved, her hand plunging into his hair, holding him to her as her other hand fisted in the quilt covering his bed. It was only moments before her climax was coating his tongue, her cry of completion nearly making him lose himself. He moved up, replacing his tongue with gentle probing fingers, bringing her down slowly.
Her gaze was hazy when her eyes finally opened, and it took a moment for them to focus on him. A lazy sated smile lifted her lips as she drew him down into a gentle, but no less passionate kiss. He rolled on top of her, settling between her legs, his cock hitting her just right, coating him in her juices. She wrapped her legs around him.
“Take me now, Killian,” she begged. “Please!” She raised her hips and he was helpless to resist her. The tip of his shaft entered her and a long shuddering sigh passed his lips as he slid home. She was so slick and so tight, he rested his head for a moment on her shoulder, just relishing the feel of her around him. Then he began slow, long, powerful thrusts designed to bring the most pleasure, while holding that precipice at bay for a bit. This was heaven. This was home. He could make love to Emma for the rest of his days and never grow weary of it.
He captured her lips with his, his tongue mimicking the action of his hips. Her legs around him tightened as she raced toward her peak, so he picked up the pace, determined to come with her. He reached down and flicked her hardened nub, sending her over the edge. Her climax triggered his and he emptied himself into her depths.
Killian could barely catch his breath. He knew now why, in marriage, the act of lovemaking was referred to as consummation, for the love he felt in his heart and the physical act they’d just partaken of had left him utterly boneless. Consumed from the inside out. They may not be married yet, but he knew he belonged to her, for as long as she would allow him, and he could only hope she’d one day agree to a more permanent attachment between them.
He looked down into the jade depths of her eyes, where he could see replete satisfaction, something else he couldn’t quite bring himself to identify, and confusion swirling in their midst.
“What is it, Swan?”
Her mouth hung open slightly and her tongue poked out and moistened her lips before she spoke.
“Did you notice?” Her voice was not much more than a whisper and if he’d been any farther away, he likely wouldn’t have caught it.
“Notice what?”
She moistened her lips again and now he could see anxious trepidation in her gaze.
“What you called me… uh… during…” she stammered.
His brows furrowed as he thought back. He couldn’t think of anything he’d said that might have provoked this kind of response from her. He shook his head slowly.
“You called me my love… you know, when I was…” she trailed off and turned her face away from him and Killian’s heart fell. He had no idea he’d uttered those words in the midst of his passion, and her response wasn’t what he would have wanted to see if he had purposefully referred to her with that appellation.
“Did you mean it?” she whispered, still not looking at him.
Killian sighed and rolled off to the side. He couldn’t lie to her. He knew in his heart that he loved her, even though they’d only been together five weeks, and he knew he wanted to someday make her his wife, raise a family with her, and grow old with her. Even if she didn’t hold him in the same regard, he had no choice but to lay his heart bare. A man unwilling to fight for what he wants, deserves what he gets, after all.
“I may not remember actually saying those words,” he began, “but, I cannot deny their veracity. I do love you, Emma Swan.” He put his finger to her lips as she opened them to speak. “And I do realize it is much too soon to expect the same esteem from you, so hear this now. I will be by your side for as long as you will allow me to be, and I hope that you will at some future time, hold me in the same regard as I hold you.”
Tears glistened in the corners of her eyes and her smile was one of affection and indulgence. As if the words that had just come out of his mouth, the ones that bared his heart for her perusal, were the height of foolishness. His heart tripped in his chest and he scratched at the patch behind his ear that he just couldn’t leave alone when he was nervous.
“It’s not too soon, Killian,” she informed him, a single tear falling down her cheek. “I love you, too.” The smile on her face rivaled the sun, and he returned it in kind before capturing her lips with his own. He pulled back and gently stroked his fingers down the side of her face, basking in the love he saw in her eyes and trying to pour everything he was feeling into his own.
“I love you, Swan. I love you, Swan. I love you, Swan,” he murmured, peppering her face with kisses. She returned his ardor just as passionately until she had to stop for a jaw popping yawn.
They both dissolved into laughter as Emma turned in his arms and settled herself in his embrace. His arms around her middle tightened until they were skin to skin from their knees, to where her head was tucked right under his chin.
“We should get some sleep while we can,” he murmured in her ear. “I plan on wearing you out this weekend.”
He could hear the grin in her voice when she spoke. “Sounds reasonable to me. Goodnight, Killian. I love you.”
“I love you, too, Swan.”
The End… for real this time.
~*~*~
Thank you for reading and sharing! I’d love to hear what you think! Happy birthday, @zaharadessert! Love you!
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Anime Update V2 41
Wolf’s Rain - Not much I can really say about this one except there was a lot of action with soldiers and guns and explosions and a really cute “girlfriends” moment with Blue and Cheza, but then it ends on Hubb and Cheza being captured with Blue and Cher are left with the army remnants who vow to protect the land they call home from whatever Lady Jaguara's got planned, as the four wolf boys trek on.
Hunter x Hunter - Gon and Killua are no good at this game is what seemed to be the takeaway here. Falling for obvious scams and failing to utilize the right card moves against the right monsters. I was actually totally with poor Biscuit Krueger in all her reactions. Speaking of, I don’t know what her deal is but she seems to have abandoned that “destroy Gon and Killua’s alliance” thing for the time being and is joining them instead. Also, a few of the Spiders have gone to the game as well, killed that one punk who challenged Killua earlier, and Shalnark theorizes Greed Island is more than a game...
Fruits Basket - Full disclosure, I did NOT enjoy watching this particular episode. Most of it was spent on Kyo going to see Akito and Akito just being completely, disgustingly abusive to Kyo as they verbally tore him down and reminded him that he’s a monster who, according to Akito, “killed his own mother”. And then after all that, Akito has the absolute GALL to claim to love Kyo very dearly. Piss off, bitch! It’s frustrating ‘cause from an outside perspective, I can spot all the ways Akito is being abusive and why Kyo shouldn’t put stock in anything they say, but Kyo, the character in the show, is the one facing this abuse, cannot recognize it for what it is, internalizes it and believes his fate is to end up Akito’s captive pet. I’m so glad he has Tohru, but I want her to save Kyo and the rest from this curse!
Date A Live S4 - So Shido actually projects himself into fucking outer space to communicate with the new Spirit, Mukuro, who has sealed her own emotions and has drawn a meteroite towards Earth and also threatens to stop the Earth's rotation should she be disturbed. That was weird, but my attention was more drawn to arrival of Elliot Baldwin Woodman, the founder of Ratatoskr we met briefly last season, who alongside Westcott, Ellen, and her sister Karen, had also founded DEM before Elliot met the Spirit of Origin and there was a fracturing of the friends, Elliot and Karen going one way while Westcott and Ellen stayed the course. And then DEM goes on the offensive, Westcott uses Beelzebub to locate the Spirits, and he has them all dragged into some darkness and trapped elsewhere.
Fate Zero - The first half of this one kind of bored me, it just wasn’t as interesting to me as the previous Kiritsugu backstory had been. The second half turned it around. That extended phone chat between Kiri and Natasha all building towards Kiri doing what I’d started to fear he was going to do and shooting Natasha’s aircraft down in flames was engrossing and devastating. He really had no qualms with killing anyone he’d considered family if it’s what needs to be done for the survival of others. But now I’ve got a better feel for what he wants to wish for: a more just world cleansed of plagues.
Re:ZERO - The next arc has started with Subaru waking up in Lord Roswaal’s Manor, being tended to by Emilia and introduced to new characters - the strange “drill-haired loli” known as Beatrice/Betty, the twin maids Rem and Ram, and the lord of the estate himself, who turns out to be a harlequinn with a strange sing-song line delivery. Was fun seeing Subaru made a servant here and bonding more with Meelie (the nickname for Emilia he just made up now), who he’s learned is of noble blood and a candidate for this world’s Royal Selection, and his affinity for petting Puck’s soft fur is honestly so adorable. But then came the cruel twist ending I was bracing myself for - Subaru got killed in his sleep and has to do this all over again!
Symphogear G - Yet again the content in the episode with the members of Finé is what steals the show for me. Maria is such an intriguing, likable and sort of admirable character, Kirika and Shirabe are absolutely precious in their relationship, and Dr. Ver gives me the creeps in all the best way. But Chris was also a standout here, putting on a stellar school festival performance with her newfound friends and singing a song that’s clearly very personal to her as she reflects on her life’s track changing and the growth she’s had - she has a place to call home now. It honestly came close to getting me choked up. Then Kirika and Shirabe stand up in the audience. Shit.
MAR - It was the Ginta VS Gillom fight. Was satisfying to see Ginta clobber the shit out of Gillom again and send him flying to his (I hope) death. Dorothy is now up for another fight in the final match against Rapunzel, and while it’s a given Dorothy’s gonna win, something tells me this won’t be the curb-stomp victory that her previous fights were.
Gintama - Got an episode with a three-stories-in-one format, which Gintoki even states at the start is more akin to what you’d expect to see in a kids cartoon show. Story 1 was about the Shinsengumi having to defend both Chief Kondou and this asshole toad alien, Story 2 was about Kagura befriending a runaway princess and helping her when the Shinsengumi are in pursuit, and Story 3 was a real quick cooking show lesson by Tae, with Odd Jobs assisting her.
AND
Have watched more Don’t Toy With Me Miss Nagatoro: 2nd Attack, an episode of A Certain Scientific Railgun (episode 3, the one with the eyebrow vandal), and even started on a gradual rewatch of Anohana: The Flower We Saw That Day for old times sake. ^^
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I posted 17,227 times in 2022
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Blogs I reblogged the most:
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I tagged 215 of my posts in 2022
#ace attorney - 37 posts
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Longest Tag: 134 characters
#and they’re like ‘oh yeah we think he used to live here and we don’t know much about him and we’re not entirely sure he’s not a ghost’
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
I just realized the critical oversight I made when I asked you about all those ships:
Villefort and Edmond!! I just think that would be an interesting plot point 👀
It's one of my favourite rarepairs, so I can't believe I forgot to include it 😩
Thoughts?
I think it’s a really interesting ship, definitely up in my favorites as well! It’s interesting to see the two interact both in the initial chapters and during the Count of Monte Cristo segment (especially since Villefort’s my favorite of the three antagonists), the two definitely have a dynamic not present in Edmond’s dynamics with the other two since Villefort was the only one that didn’t hate Edmond in the beginning and how Count is so disturbed and even regretful when he sees both how he’d assisted in the only poisonings he hadn’t expected or wanted for his plan and that he’d driven Villefort to madness
I feel like the two could’ve gotten along well pre-Chateau d’If if the circumstances were different, and I think it’s interesting to consider after the events of the Count’s revenge, since it poses two largely different and both interesting dynamics with the same characters
It would be a really interesting plot point, that’s for sure
3 notes - Posted February 18, 2022
#4
GREETING.
You introduced me to the ship of Edmond and Caderousse, and I have to admit that this ship has not left my head since. Therefore, I have chosen to show you this song I found that makes me think of Them. Please enjoy and consider it a 'thank you' :]
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=5-KOZl5CLbU
YOU’RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT IT’S THEM
I am VERY excited because I love this ship so much but no one ever talks about it-
4 notes - Posted May 25, 2022
#3
Okay I'm sorry to keep sending you so many asks but
Edmond when he finds out that both of his adopted children are in love with the same Villefort
Edmond: “I sure am glad my revenge against the Villeforts is going smoothly. There’s nothing that could ruin this.”
Haydèe and Maximilian standing outside the room:
5 notes - Posted February 17, 2022
#2
Okay, I'm going to list some more TCoMC rarepairs to get your opinion, because I'm excited about this now :D
Albert/Benedetto
Valentine/Haydèe
Albert/Beauchamp
Villefort/Danglars (maybe not AS rare but y'know)
Villefort/Hermine (technically canon but I haven't seen anybody talking about it and I find their few interactions to actually be quite sweet, despite Villefort being the way he is)
These are all positive since I have never been able to decide on a ship in my life but here we go:
Albert/Benedetto: This ship and Villefort/Danglars are the two on the list I’ve written for before, I really enjoy this one! It’s probably tied with Franz/Albert for my favorite Albert ship
I think the two would have an interesting dynamic both before and after Benedetto’s reveal, also that Albert would probably grow into the only one that really got to see Benedetto’s personality before his identity was revealed
Valentine/Haydèe: I really like this one too (it is. Vastly superior. To a certain canon ship involving Haydèe)
I do wish we got to see these two interacting with each other (or more Valentine in general because I love her dearly) but I think they’d have a nice dynamic, probably one of the less chaotic ships for the two
Also very funny to imagine Haydèe revealing she’s in love with a Villefort to Count
Albert/Beauchamp: I’d actually never considered this one, but I’m absolutely thinking about it now
One of my favorite chapters in the book is the one where Beauchamp tells Albert about Fernand’s treason and then comforts Albert and does his best to erase the knowledge of the article or the Janina plot from the public eye
Because it was a chapter where you could tell just how much he cared about Albert, especially since he could’ve just fought in a duel with Albert, but instead took weeks out of his life to go on a trip to Janina specifically so he would know to tell Albert or take back what he said
Like he very clearly cares for Albert, especially from that chapter to the duel with Count chapter and it’s really nice to see
A good ship, a good character dynamic, 11/10
Villefort/Danglars: I mentioned it at the top, but I have written for this pairing before and it’s probably my favorite Villefort pairing (my favorite Danglars ship is probably tied between this one and Danglars/Caderousse)
I think these two have a dynamic that’s really unique to them, one you can’t really find much in other ships
I do think one of the things that make ships from TCoMC so good is the strong characterization a lot of the characters have, and these two are a really good example of that
Definitely one of my favorite ships
Villefort/Hermine: I like this ship, their interactions in the book were really interesting, and with Benedetto, it was a really interesting plot point
I definitely think the two loved each other, even if they weren’t able to really be a proper couple, and I feel like their relationship wouldn’t have ended the way it did without the supposed death of their child
I do think it would’ve been interesting to see more of the immediate aftermath of the whole Bertuccio stabbing Villefort incident, especially how Hermine reacted and how the two grew apart slightly after everything
But yeah, despite it being in the book, I’ve not seen much content for it
Other than Renee/Villefort (and sort of Danglars/Villefort), I don’t see much of Villefort being shipped with anyone in the fandom, honestly (I might be managing to miss it entirely, but overall I can’t think of many times I’ve seen him shipped with other characters)
Overall, there aren’t many ships in the book I don’t like, I have favorites, but I’m definitely a multishipper 😅
6 notes - Posted February 17, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
I've been meaning to draw something about this but haven't been able to get it right yet so I'm just sending it rn but... Scenario where Edmond takes Caderousse along to that party and Danglars is just internally screaming bc he's the only one who recognizes him but he can't say anything about it bc he'd look insane, and Caderousse purposely avoids talking to him the whole time so he's just trying to figure out what in the world is going on like
Absolutely hilarious idea that I couldn’t not draw something for-
What is the proper response to seeing your ex with the Count of Monte Cristo
How do you recover from that
8 notes - Posted May 31, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
#tumblr2022#year in review#my 2022 tumblr year in review#your tumblr year in review#it’s the way all of my top posts are me talking to Rowan-
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[Games in 2023: Pokemon DLC "The Teal Mask"]
*Insert screenshot of Nemona shouting “It’s TIIIME!”*
Given that Pokémon Scarlet and Violet are somewhat controversial, I’ll just get my thoughts on the base game out now. Yes, they run like shit. Yes, the most profitable franchise in existence maybe shouldn’t have this problem. Yes, I dearly hope the developers get more time to work their craft going forward. Yes, I thoroughly enjoyed my time playing Violet. No, performance issues (which have plagued Pokémon continuously since the beginning) aren’t enough to single-handedly destroy the experience for me. Yes, I think the performance issues are the only glaring flaw, and that Scarlet and Violet are otherwise excellent Pokémon games. With that out of the way…
I’m a fan of Pokémon adopting this new DLC model as opposed to creating third versions or second paired versions. It offers all the benefits of getting a revised, expanded version of the games at half the cost! (Certainly wish the old style had gone out on a high note rather than fucking USUM, but…) And in this case, the remaining mysteries surrounding Area Zero still have quite the firm grip on me. Like I said before, this is probably the first time (at least in a long while) I’ve actually sought out Pokémon theories rather than avoiding them. So I’ve been awfully excited to get my hands on Teal Mask and see if it has any answers for us!
This post will contain spoilers for base SV and Teal Mask, so tl;dr: Kitakami is plenty fun to explore and brings back some Pokémon I really like, though I’d always like more, and the story feels just a little like filler. Also, Gligar is a Scarlet exclusive and that makes me sad. D:
It seems that, like Isle of Armor, Teal Mask can open up early in the main game, and then the levels all jump after you clear…well, I’m not sure how much exactly, but after endgame stuff. This sounds neat but I’ve already beaten the game, so there’s not much more I can say on that point. After a bit of story you obtain the Teal Style Card to unlock new customization options, though only a few caught my eye personally. (You can buy Professor Laventon’s hat now!!) The boutiques and salons all have a little teal card icon next to the new stuff, which is a touch I really like, makes it easier for me to skim the new stuff rather than going through everything. I can’t remember if this was done in SwSh or not? There are also 30 new TMs available using materials dropped by the new Pokémon ranging from exciting choices like Solar Blade and Scald and High Horsepower, to…Roar? And, uh, Super Fang…huh. But of course, new DLC means more Pokémon! There aren’t too many brand new ones—four legendaries and a new two-stage convergent Pokémon—but that feels about on par so I’m not complaining. As for newly returning Pokémon, about 100 are brought back, which is…a relatively small amount if I really think about it. I dunno, each game having limits on what can be transferred in is still new so I’m not quite sure how to judge this sort of thing yet. If nothing else it makes it pretty quick to complete the Kitakami Dex, getting you a charm that increases the number of Tera Shards you get from raids. I haven’t been changing my Pokémon’s Tera Types yet but I’m thinking of experimenting once I get this.
The new map added in this DLC is the region of Kitakami, based on an area of Japan just a bit south of Hokkaido/Sinnoh/Hisui (note this, it’s important). It’s really cool to be able to go to a completely separate region like in the Johto games, even if the scale here is noticeably smaller. The map is centered around Oni Mountain much the same way Paldea is centered around the Great Crater, with some fields, wasteland, and a forest surrounding it. There’s a lot of Pokémon and items all over the mountain, plus several paths through it, and at the very top is a pool of water containing terastal crystals…interesting. The peak’s music even has a hint of Area Zero in it. (I’m going to put a pin in that for now.) If you do want to go back to Paldea, all you have to do is open your map, press a shoulder button to switch regions, and fly there—it’s wonderfully convenient! There are also new icons for the loading screen when flying: a taxi being carried by Noctowl if you’re in Kitakami, and an airplane briefly crossing paths with a Dragonite when you move between regions. It’s a charming little addition.
Now then, let’s talk about the story. Once you gain access to the Teal Mask content, you receive a call from Mr. Jacq informing you that you’re one of four students who have been randomly selected to go on a school trip to the faraway Kitakami region! Upon heading back to the academy for details, you encounter Ms. Briar, a teacher at your sister school Blueberry Academy—she’ll be chaperoning you in addition to a few Blueberry students. She very quickly brings up Area Zero and drops that she’s a descendant of Heath, pulls out the original manuscript of the Scarlet/Violet Book, and shows you an unredacted version of the passage about Terapagos. Okay. Sudden, but interesting. She’s also going through the process of getting permission to enter Area Zero herself, so I guess that’s going to be how the DLC storylines lead us back there. Her motivation of proving Heath was right interests me, there are a few potential directions it could go, but for now it’s…well, I’ll save that for later. When you arrive in Kitakami you encounter a pair of Blueberry students: Carmine and Kieran, siblings who originally grew up here in Kitakami. An overbearing older sibling and a quiet younger sibling, that’s a fine enough place to start. Your assignment for the trip is to search out signboards relating a legend about Pokémon known as the Loyal Three sacrificing themselves to protect the region from a rampaging Ogre, and midway through you attend a festival that celebrates that same legend. And, to your surprise, the Pokémon Ogerpon makes an appearance! However, she makes a hasty retreat, dropping the titular Teal Mask in the process.
This is where the story really kicks off…and it’s a rather contentious inciting incident. You see, Kieran always loved the ogre from the legend (obviously Ogerpon). But during the festival, only you the player and Carmine saw Ogerpon, and Carmine immediately decides we need to hide this from Kieran because he would be sad that he missed out…or something. It’s honestly pretty flimsy, and as you can probably guess this secret eventually comes out and causes some completely avoidable tension between the characters. From here Carmine warms up to you and Kieran develops some kind of inferiority complex (I think?), which…as a trajectory for these characters, developing in ways inverse to your initial impressions of them, is a perfectly sound idea. The execution here, though, is serviceable at best. Obviously we’re going to see more of these two in the Indigo Disk DLC, so I’m hoping they’re improved upon there; myself, I think they both need more concrete backstory as a start. I don’t really understand why Carmine is Like That, or why Kieran has such a deep well of rage to tap. I dunno, after Starfall Street and everything with Arven I had my expectations set a little higher.
One thing that did intrigue me: Carmine and Kieran’s grandfather explains that the legend of the ogre and the Loyal Three is actually bullshit! Ogerpon and a human came to Kitakami from a faraway land long ago, but the people were scared of them, so the only way they could live in peace was with the help of a mask maker. The beautiful masks he made concealed their identities, but also attracted the attention of three greedy Pokémon, who stole three of the four masks and killed the human. Ogerpon then killed the three of them, but was unable to retrieve the masks, and the people assumed she was the one in the wrong. That’s really interesting! Especially since these Pokémon were inspired by the legend of Momotaro—I didn’t expect they’d be willing to turn things around like that. In any event, the Teal Mask needs repaired, and that requires a special crystal that Ogerpon’s trainer brought here from his homeland…a crystal at the top of Oni Mountain which is confirmed by Briar to be terastal crystals…hmmmm. So I guess Ogerpon and her trainer were originally from Paldea after all? Unfortunately, this is the only thing other than Briar’s motivation that feels like an addition to the lore of the base game, which is disappointing. Not entirely a surprise, I guess, since we’re in a different region and all but…I don’t quite understand why the DLC pass as a whole is called The Hidden Treasure of Area Zero? Again, it seems like Briar will lead us back to it after everything’s said and done, but it’s weird to group our exploits in Kitakami and Blueberry Academy all under that umbrella. Well, I should probably reserve judgment for now. Anyway.
The Loyal Three come back to life, which while not properly explained, I interpreted as being Kieran’s frustration and negative energy revitalizing them. Whatever the case, the toxic trio reclaim the masks they stole from the villagers who still think they’re the good guys, and the poor saps even feed them stat boosting mochi (pretty funny tbh), so they then go after Ogerpon to take their revenge. After saving Ogerpon you then have to track the three down individually, fight them in a Titan-style battle with Carmine’s help, and recover Ogerpon’s masks one-by-one. While this is going on, Kieran actually goes and tells the town the truth about Ogerpon and the Loyal Three, and to everyone’s surprise they’re willing to accept the truth and actually apologize to Ogerpon in a fairly heartwarming moment. When it’s all over, Ogerpon wants to come with you, but you first have to fight Kieran (who wants Ogerpon to stay with him) and then Ogerpon herself. The Ogerpon battle is pretty neat: she puts on one of her masks and Terastallizes it, getting a boss health bar and everything, then when you defeat her, she pulls out the next mask and you have to beat her again, repeating until you’ve seen what all four masks can do. It’s a fun way to showcase Ogerpon’s unique gimmick, and since each mask has a different type and boosts different stats, it forces you to adapt quickly in order to come out on top. A great way to cap off your adventure!
After that, you can go battle the Loyal Three again to catch them, keep checking the new raids, hunt down the members of the “Ogre Clan” for some relatively tough trainer battles with tempting rewards…and finally, there’s one notable sidequest you can do. Almost as soon as you arrive in Kitakami you can meet with Perrin, a photographer who looks suspiciously similar to Adaman. (She also has a Hisuian Growlithe, which I like—I can believe a family descended from the Diamond Clan has been selectively breeding Growlithe to maintain its Hisuian Form throughout the years.) She has a job for you, but before she’ll tell you what it is, you have to catch 150 Pokémon in the Kitakami Dex. That, uh…I mean I can understand using that as a milestone to unlock stuff, and I can see a logic to follow, but it was a bit jarring for her to just flat out tell me to complete the Dex out of nowhere. Anyway, once you’ve done that and had a battle with her, you head to the Timeless Woods (hmm) to hunt for a mysterious Pokémon who shows up on foggy nights. (She tells you what kind of Pokémon it is, but this specimen is unique and hasn’t been properly documented or anything yet, that kind of mysterious.) You then play through a sort of minigame where you’re put in the woods on a foggy night without Koraidon/Miraidon, and need to sneak up on the Pokémon there to take decent pictures of them. It’s fairly generous, they don’t exactly have to be expert shots. Doing this allows Perrin to calibrate some tracking device even she doesn’t understand to pinpoint the location of the only Pokémon not photographed (idk), and I believe it’s here she tells you her reason for doing all this? If not here then it must’ve been a little earlier. She talks about how she’s lost her passion for her art and came after this Pokémon because she thought it’d be the inspiration she needed. That’s, uh, that’s something, honestly, hits pretty close to home for me personally, so it may be bias but I appreciate her character despite the short amount of screen time she gets. Anyway, you’re able to track down the strange Pokémon: an Ursaluna. Cool, what a neat way to justify the presence of another Hisuian Pokémon! But, wait, it’s not a normal Ursaluna…it’s bigger than usual, and walks on two legs…the mud caking its fur has changed, encasing it like armor and covering one eye…and the moon on its forehead has turned blood red. This is Bloodmoon Ursaluna! It’s a special attacker instead of physical; it’s got a signature move that’s the special equivalent of Gigaton Hammer; and it has a unique ability that combines like three other abilities into one! It swam here from Hisui long ago, awakened a mysterious power, and I guess is just immortal or something? You fight it in a boss battle and catch it, and while it’s a bit sad this is the only Ursaluna you can catch, it more than makes up for it by being so fucking cool. Ah, anyway…Perrin tells you that the shots she got of Ursaluna are too blurry to be of any professional use, but that they’re some of her favorite photos she’s ever taken. With her creative passion reignited, she heads off…I wonder if she’ll be in Indigo Disk…or maybe instead there’ll be someone there who looks just like Irida? Either’s fine. Or both. I’ll take as many of this slick character designs as I can get.
One final thing before wrapping up: I have something of a conspiracy theory that some elements of Teal Mask (or at least Kitakami) were originally conceived as DLC for Legends Arceus, but were then retrofitted for SV after some corporate meddling. Like I was saying before, there’s really very little here tying back to the main game, and Kitakami is just about the size of one of the zones from PLA. Take into account that the region is based on an area that’s quite close to Hokkaido/Sinnoh/Hisui, and the real-world mountain used as a base for Oni Mountain has an Ainu name, and there’s really only one town and no formal Pokémon Center, and the entire Perrin sidequest. An Adaman lookalike takes you to an area called the Timeless Woods, where Pokémon who don’t usually appear there suddenly spawn during a strange weather event, and you end up fighting a special Ursaluna? (The Timeless Woods also have White-Striped Basculin for some reason?) Like, it can’t just be me. Right?
All in all, I’ve had a real good time with Teal Mask, and I’m still having a good time trying out the rest of what Kitakami has to offer! It definitely adds to SV, though I wouldn’t say I was as impressed with it by itself as I was with the base game. If I were to make changes, I would definitely smooth out Carmine and Kieran’s arcs, as well as extend the Perrin sidequest and do a bit more with Briar…and have more returning Pokémon of course, heh. I’m looking forward to Indigo Disk, though I am sort of hoping it gets delayed a bit; I don’t like the idea of the devs being pushed to follow-up that quickly.
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Clouds
When I went into labor I saw rain clouds outside the window of our room. It started storming and the area of the hospital was one I lived in two years prior. One where I had sat outside to watch rain storms and drink tea outside until late into the night listening to indie bands and casually smoked or ate muffins I made myself. The apartment I so dearly loved and hated all at once. I would sit outside the door and watch rain cascade downwards and listen to Rose by Briston Maroney. I was in a cozy part of my life at that time before finding my partner. I was alone and it was quiet yet I had so many gifts of life being given to me by simply existing. I remember listening to the song everytime it rained in the area.. and feeling this deep emotion I was unfamiliar with, yet accepted. To then I had always loved the song with all my heart and just enjoyed it because I shared it with nothing but the rain.. but now I share it with my son. I made my partner play the song while lightning started striking out of the clouds. I heard the rain. I could smell it vaguely as if a window was opened slightly ajar to let the air pass. I remember coming in and out of my nightmare forced sleeps to the pain of my child beginning to come into the world.. that song in the back of my mind.. and when i woke up to the chill of February and no child to speak of.. I knew I was doomed my whole life to feel tears swell up at the sight of clouds.. or rain.. of roses.. of that song. Every time I think that I have shifted my load to carry I realize that the weight is still crushing me.. but I’ve never cracked under pressure before. How could I do so now. I still remember that deep fog in my head as I awoke and realized that although my life had not yet ended, my heart stopped beating. I fight those unfamiliar demonized panic attacks and in my fears I breathe ever so slowly to catch up with my feelings so I don’t let the whirlwind take me away.
I see clouds and I think of him. I think about how horrible it is to give your son back to God after having crafted him in your own body. How that little boy would’ve been. How perfect he looked. I wish I could’ve stood up and did his feet prints myself. I wish I would’ve washed his body. I wish I had been awake.. I wish the fog hadn’t have taken me so fast without me knowing. I see rain and even when I smell the Earth, I pray he’s near. I wish so badly for him to have made it. I wish so badly to have a 4 month old boy, who’s just come out if NICU. I wish that I could hear him cry. Sometimes if it’s quite enough.. I can hear his heart beating.. It’s all in my head because I can’t possibly cope by letting him go.. but my household never made soft people. The cruel environment created something hard and slightly undeserving. I always assume God took him away because I didn’t deserve to love anything or be apart of anything good. I think I hold onto that a lot as it’s the only way to humble me. I didn’t deserve the family life that was separate from the one I was born in.. and that tiny baby boy deserved more and better.
I don’t even try anymore. There’s no point in thinking I deserve better.. but when I see the clouds or rainbows.. when I see the rain.. when I hear the storm. I want it all the more because I’m a greedy selfish human. It’s my nature to want that boy back. To want that life back. If I could go back and listen to rose again for the first time.. I’d know exactly what that unusual feeling was. It was loss before I had even gotten to experience it.
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"Wait!" you call out, not wanting the mystery person to leave just yet. "May I ask who I'm talking to? I can't see you."
If you can't see me, I'd have to assume you to be blind.
Were they crazy? Or perhaps really small? You looked around again, this time scanning the grass for any movement.
Neither. However, I will forgive your insult, for you are only human. I know it is in your nature; after all, I made you.
Now you're very confused. You have a thought for a moment that it could be your mom; who else could say they made you. That wouldn't make any sense though, as the voice didn't sound anything like her.
In a way, yes. I've been called many things, Mother Nature being one of them. However, when most see me like this, they choose to call me the Tree of Life.
You turn to look at the gnarled stump, suspicion clear on your face; you had always thought of Mother Nature as a beautiful figure, tending to birds and deer and bunnies. This ugly tree sitting before you seemed disgraceful and undeserving of such an important title.
You would think that, wouldn't you. However, does a mother not love even her ugliest child? Would I then be a good mother if I did not so dearly love even my ugliest creations?
You thought about it a moment, deciding that did make sense. An ugly tree would just be a tree in the eyes of its creator.
"Alright, then. If you're Mother Nature, why do bad things happen? Why do people kill and hurt and steal and lie? Why do storms capsize boats, why do tornadoes destroy homes? Why would you make things that can do bad?"
To answer that, I'll ask you a question. Is life worth living with no free will? Is it even yours to live if you have no control over the choices you make, be they good or bad? I create life to exist, to flourish and be beautiful. I have no say over whether the choices made will be good or bad, nor do such trivial things concern me. What is good to a wolf is bad for the rabbit it catches. What is bad for humans is good for the storm ravaging the land. Everything is perspective, and life goes on.
You think over those words, trying to see the world from her shoes roots. You suppose a world with no bad things happening would be incredibly stagnant; if the wolf didn't hunt so as to not cause the rabbit pain, he himself would go hungry and die. There was no universal solution.
"I think I understand a bit more, Mother Nature."
You don't have to fully understand; everything is much bigger than you could ever know. Your job is to enjoy life to the fullest, whatever that may mean to you. If you want to work and make a lot of money, then do so. If you wish to surround yourself with friends and family, or to denounce everyone you've ever known; I only want you to be happy. If that means disappearing into the woods never to be found again, so be it; I will keep you company.
"Thank you."
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DRUNK PROCLAMATIONS ; bucky barnes
pairing: avenger!bucky barnes x avenger!female!reader
summary: a voicemail leaves many thoughts running through bucky’s head. his heart soars with happiness before it crashes back into reality - what if she didn’t mean what she said? bucky’s only solution is to avoid her like hell. he doesn’t want to hear the truth from her lips, ready to take back everything she said in her voicemail because he knows he’s not worth any of it.
word count: 3.2k
warnings: insecure bucky, mentions of drinking, swearing, angst with a happy ending
note: written as part of @pellucid-constellations‘s love letters writing challenge! i used the prompt “and i’ve never felt like that before, but something about you makes me want to feel like that”. i hope you enjoy!
Bucky can’t fall asleep.
This isn’t a shocking revelation, he’s had many nights where he would stare into the darkness for hours, preferring it to the images he would conjure up in his sleep. What’s shocking is the reason that is keeping him up this time. His phone lights up on the bedside table and his heart starts to race again, an automatic reaction no thanks to [Name].
His eyes fly over to his phone to find a notification asking him to update his phone software. Bucky supposes he’s glad for the dumb notification. If it was a text, or god forbid another voicemail, he might just have a heart attack. Yes, a voicemail is what’s gotten Bucky all worked up. He groans just at the thought, feeling like a love-sick high school boy.
Bucky closes his eyes, in a lame attempt to fall asleep but minutes pass by before they shoot open again and he reaches out to grab his phone and soon, he’s opening the voicemail from [Name] that he received hours ago. He’s glad that Sam taught him how to open his voicemails (though he could have gone without the ‘old man’ jokes).
‘Hey Bucky! Hope you’re doing alright back at the tower! We’re having a blast but I wish you were here right now’
He swallows the lump in his throat as he starts the voicemail. He assumes that she’s outside somewhere as he can hear muffled music in the background but for the most part, it’s quiet. Her words are slightly slurred and he knows it doesn’t take much for [Name] to get drunk.
[Name] had been the first person to try and become his friend ever since he arrived at the tower and through many trials and errors, she was finally able to break down the wall Bucky had carefully built around himself. [Name]’s friendship is now something that he holds dearly and somewhere along the way, he started to fall for her.
Initially, he chalked it up to [Name] being the first woman in decades to give him some semblance of attention that he started to mix friendly gestures with romantic ones but as time went by, it became increasingly difficult to ignore the fact that his heart seemed to beat a little faster when she was around.
‘I know that you don’t really like big crowds so I’m not upset or anything. I know you try your best and it gets too much sometimes.’
It’s something that Bucky is insanely grateful for, how much she understands him. He was close to changing his mind about going out with the team after seeing [Name] in that little red dress but he just couldn’t deal with crowds tonight. Though she was disappointed about it, [Name] didn’t push him either.
‘I think it would have been more fun with you though. Well, doing anything with you is more fun! We can go somewhere more private next time! Just you and me?
I really like spending time with you Buck, so it doesn’t matter what we do. As long as I can be near you, I’d do anything really’
His hand starts to shake at her words, just as it did the first time he listened to the voicemail. And he can’t even bring himself to listen to her list out different things to do or places to go as he prepares his heart for what comes after.
There’s a pause in your words - only the muffled music in the background and his racing heart reaches his ears until-
‘I think I like you Bucky. No, I know I do. Friends don’t feel like this. Friends don’t say these things, do they? I don’t know, but I know what I feel for you is more that just a friendship. I might even love you and I’ve never felt like that before but there’s something about you that makes me want to feel like that. I don’t know, I think I’ve always felt the urge to gravitate towards you since we met, even if you were grumpy and closed off’
She giggles and Bucky relishes in it, her laughter is better than any music that’s been produced in this day and age. Hell, he’d listen to her laughter over his old 40′s records any day.
‘I wonder what it’s like to kiss you. I mean, I don’t want to overstep your boundaries but every time I watch you lick your lips, god Bucky, you don’t know what it does to me. I’d give you everything if you let me, Buck. You deserve it and a whole lot more. I-’
[Name]’s interrupted by someone, presumably Sam, who’s telling her to come back inside.
‘I gotta go for now, Bucky. I’ll see you when I get back at the tower, ‘kay?’
The voicemail closes as Bucky remains still, taking in her words. They come as much as a shock to him as it did the first time, no matter how many time he’s listened to it now.
Hours later, the team get back to the tower and Steve knocks on his door to make sure he’s alright. He can hear an intoxicated [Name] stumble through the corridors, wanting to do the same and he silently thanks Natasha when she steers [Name] into her own room, telling her that she can talk to Bucky sober in the morning, much to [Name]’s displeasure.
Bucky’s not sure if he’s ready to be confronted about the voicemail yet. Even if she boldly proclaimed her affections for him (albeit drunk), there’s a small voice that drips in the caverns of his mind. What if she didn’t mean it? Would she have meant them sober?
She doesn’t remember.
Bucky spent hours upon hours, bracing himself for the confrontation he was so sure would come up in the morning when she greets him in the kitchen, but there was nothing.
“How the hell are you so chipper?” Sam grumbles, rolling his eyes as [Name] sticks her tongue out at him, “You could barely hold yourself straight up not even twelve hours ago”
“I’m just built better than you,” She jokes, laughing when Sam groans and holds his head when she ‘accidentally’ closes the drawer a little too loud.
Steve chuckles and Natasha can’t hide her smirk at the comment, “She’s got a point Sam. I mean, we’re all doing okay”
“Steve, you’re a super soldier and Natasha, you’re an assassin. I don’t even want to hear it from the two of you,” Sam sighs before pointing to [Name], “But she’s normal, like me. Well, not like me because she doesn’t get hangovers even when she drinks her weight in alcohol! Which is weird! You’re not normal, [Name]!”
[Name] laughs, not even slightly deterred by his comments as he continues to rant about her abnormalities. When she looks over to see Bucky quietly entering the kitchen and sit next to Steve, her smile widens, “Good morning, Bucky!”
He nods at her cautiously, the voicemail lingers in his mind, “Mornin’. Have a good night?”
If she notices that something’s off with him, she doesn’t mention it.
“I’m sure I did,” [Name] jokes, “I don’t really remember much of anything last night, if I’m being honest”
And it’s something that should fill Bucky with relief, but it doesn’t. She doesn’t remember. The thought manifests into something bigger. Did it even matter to her, if it wasn’t even worth remembering? Something that is so inconsequential to her but kept him up for hours, hoping that she meant every word she said.
“I did miss you though,” [Name] adds, snapping him out of his tortuous thoughts.
He’s glad that he’s trained himself to remain passive Bucky doesn’t know if he can ever get used to hearing those sort of things from her. Even if they were only said platonically. It leaves a bitter taste in his mouth.
Sam interrupts, groaning loudly, “I already feel like throwing up without needing to see the two of you flirt!”
“Oh, stop it!” [Name] reprimands, playfully, “I’m not flirting with him!”
The comment hits his heart just a bit harder than it usually does (his previous thoughts didn’t exactly help either) and he feels the urge to be alone. So he abruptly stands up, interrupting the flow of conversation around the table and rushes back to his room for a moment of silence.
Bucky needs time to collect his thoughts, to stop making the voicemail more than what it is - a mistake. He should be grateful for her lack of memories. This means he can carry on as normal with her without making it weird or awkward for both parties. Because he’s sure that if she rejected him face to face, his heart would split open.
It’s a blessing in disguise. Something that he repeats to himself, in an attempt to convince himself that things are better the way it is. There were only two other outcomes - one which he’s sure would never happen - and Bucky doesn’t know how he would be able to be around her if he has to hear it from her.
A knock on his door brings him out of his trance and he hears [Name]’s soft and worrying voice through the wood.
“Bucky, is everything okay?”
A few seconds pass in silence as Bucky comes to terms with reality, to forget about the voicemail. He walks over to open his door, finding [Name] staring up at him with furrowed eyebrows. His hand twitches as he feels the urge to smooth out the wrinkles that appear due to her concern but he holds himself back.
“Yeah, sorry about that, I’m fine”
He’s not sure that she believes him, but she doesn’t push him for the truth either. As he follows her back into the kitchen, he lets out a sigh.
He can do this, pretend that he’s not head over heels in love with [Name], it’s something he’s done for months. Because he’d rather keep her as a friend than not have her at all.
He’s a coward.
The fact that [Name] doesn’t remember confessing to him hurts him more than it should have. Bucky knows he should be grateful, really, because this means he doesn’t need to listen to her take back everything she said in her voicemail and he can carry on their friendship as if it never happened in the first place, but he can’t forget it.
He tried to go through the days as normal, as he always had until that night, but a couple weeks pass by and Bucky isn’t so sure he can keep up the facade anymore. So he does the next best thing he can come up with - avoid the hell out of her.
It’s not a good idea, he knows that but that voicemail has given him too much false hope. He used to be fine standing beside her but now he finds himself inching his fingers closer to [Name]’s, gazing at her just a little longer. He feels like a love-sick puppy following its owner around.
Bucky feels guilty though, seeing the hurt and confusion on [Name]’s face when he starts hanging out with her less and less, but with her voicemail at the forefront of his mind and a confession of his own ready to spill from his lips, he figures this is the best move for some self-preservation. And to get rid of these feelings, he first needs to rid himself of her first, so he can come back a better man with no romantic feelings whatsoever (though that’s proving to be difficult regardless).
And despite knowing that something’s wrong, [Name] respects his boundaries, as she always did and gives him the space that he wants (though he doesn’t really want it). Which is why he doesn’t expect a confrontation.
There’s a loud knocking on the door and Bucky assumes it’s Steve checking up on him again. He’s been doing so the past few days as Bucky holes himself up in his room just as he did so when he first joined the team.
No matter how many times Bucky tells him he’s fine, Steve knows there’s no truth in his words at all. And while Bucky is grateful that his best friend cares deeply for him, it’s not really needed at the moment.
But it’s not Steve.
[Name] is able to push him back into his room as she’s caught him off guard. Her eyes gleam with determination and anger and Bucky knows that he might not be able to avoid this situation any longer.
“Bucky, I can’t do this anymore,” Her words are sharp and he winces at her tone. Yeah, she wasn’t happy with him in the slightest.
“Tell me, what the hell have I done to make you avoid me?” [Name] asks him, cutting him off effectively when she sees his mouth open, “And don’t give me that ‘I don’t know what you’re talking about’ bullshit”
He closes his mouth, unable to think up of any excuse that would deter [Name] from dropping the subject. The silence stretches between them as he does his best to avoid her piercing eyes.
[Name] scoffs, looking away and Bucky takes this time to look at her. She’s not as angry as she was when she stormed into his room. Rather, she looks tired and frustrated and incredibly hurt.
“If I did something to hurt you,” [Name] starts, slouching against his desk, “Then I’m sorry”
“You didn’t,” Bucky immediately clarifies, shaking his head, “God, [Name]. None of this is your fault”
“Then why are you avoiding me?” She questions, finally looking back at him. She looks as if she’s on the verge of crying and Bucky wants nothing more than to wrap her up in his arms, “One day we were fine and then suddenly we weren’t. I miss you, Buck”
He’s silent again, contemplating on whether to let the truth out or not as she stands up straight and suddenly, he’s in panic mode. [Name] looks like she’s about to walk out - maybe out of his life for good, tired of his shit. And he figures now is as good as any time to say everything that’s been on his mind. Because even if she might want space from him afterwards, if there’s even a slim chance that they can get back to their friendship, he’ll take it.
“That night,” His voice stops her from moving but he doesn’t look at her, “A couple of weeks ago where you and the rest went out. You left me a voicemail... telling me that you like me. Might love me, even”
And it’s [Name]’s turn to freeze up. He’s not sure what’s running through her head as he speaks and to be honest, he’s afraid to know.
“And...,” Bucky’s voice breaks slightly and he clears his throat, “I know that it was just a mistake on your part. You were drunk, you weren’t in your right mind and you didn’t mean what you said. I mean...” How could you love someone like me?
His heart constricts as the words get stuck in his throat so he moves on.
“You didn’t remember any of it the next morning and I saw it as a sign to pretend the voicemail never happened. But I can’t forget it, [Name]. I tried, I really did,” Bucky clenches his jaw, “I really wanted to, for the sake of our friendship but I couldn’t stop thinking about what you said to me that night. More than anything, I wanted it to be real.”
And there it was, he finally said it out loud.
“I like you, [Name]. No, I’m in love with you. And I know I’m not good enough for you, someone as broken as me, you deserve more than what I could ever give,” He lets out a self-deprecating laugh, “But I keep clinging onto that voicemail because even if you didn’t mean it, I’ve never wanted anything more”
He waits to allow his words to sink in for her and prepares his heart for her next action. He just hopes whatever the outcome is, no matter how much space she needs away from him, she’ll allow him to stand by her again eventually.
The sound of his phone ringing makes him jump and when he eyes his phone lying on the bed, he’s confused to see [Name]’s picture on his screen. His eyes, cautiously yet questioningly, look over to her as she walks over. He’s unsure what to do but she reaches out to grab his wrist when he reaches over in an attempt to grab his phone.
[Name] only lets him go when she hears his voicemail message, staring up at Bucky as she speaks.
“Hey Bucky, it’s [Name]. Though I’m sure you know that,” [Name] gives him a half-hearted smile, “Last time I left you a voicemail, I told you that I think I’m in love with you. I’m not really sure what I said and I guess I can’t blame you for thinking I didn’t mean it because I was drunk. But I’m sober now, so listen carefully, alright?”
At this, Bucky straightens up. His heart is pounding so loudly, he’s sure she can hear it as well but doing as he’s told, Bucky takes in your words.
“I love you. I’m in love with you. I have been for a while and I suppose that’s why it hurt a lot when you suddenly began avoiding me. Though I wish you would’ve said something earlier because I could’ve loved you openly a whole lot earlier. I don’t want to hear that ‘I’m not good enough for you’ bullshit again, do you hear me? You are more than good enough, Bucky. And if you let me, I’ll love you in all the ways you deserve to be loved”
Bucky is stunned into silence. There’s various emotions running through him, confusion, surprise, doubt, but one feeling stands above all, an overwhelming happiness.
Bucky opens and closes his mouth several times, dumbfounded and at a loss of words. He’s so engulfed in his emotions, he’s not sure what to say.
“Really?”
And she laughs, covering her mouth in attempt to conceal her laughter, “Yes Bucky, really”
[Name] throws her phone on the bed and takes a step closer to him, slowly linking her fingers with his.
“I love you, Bucky,” She whispers, words meant only for his ears, “Will you love me back?”
“I already do, sweetheart,” Bucky grins widely, freeing one of his hands to reach up and cup her face, “I love you, so much. Fuck, this feels like a dream”
“It’s not, Buck. I promise you, it’s all real,” [Name] reaffirms, “Would you like me to write you a love letter to prove it? I’m sure that’s more your style, old man”
Bucky laughs, shaking his head, “This is better than any love letter I’ve ever received”
And he means it with all his heart. The dozens of love letters he received back in the day couldn’t hold a candle to her voicemail.
“I’m gonna kiss you now, Buck,” She tells him, her lips ghost over his, “I’m going to show you how much I love you and how much you mean to me, you hear?”
“Loud and clear, doll”
#loveletterswritingchallenge#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes fanfic#bucky barnes fic#bucky barnes one shot#bucky x reader#bucky barnes x you#— chloe writes ✍🏼#bucky barnes
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I've been having major thoughts of Dimitri and Seteth dealing with a brat. Like they're laid back, do what they want, tease, and break rules sometimes on PURPOSE to bother them. Nsfw or sfw or both just anything from you is fine bc it's always chefs kiss
Well now, those are two VERY different ways of taming a brat I'd say :3 ((also thank you ^^))
cw: sub-dom dynamics, brat taming, some degradation
Dimitri, Seteth x Brat!Reader (GN)
NSFW 18+
Dimitri:
- Dimitri doesn't instinctively lean into power play, and if you begin to introduce him to it, he does enjoy it, but primarily as a softer Dom. As a result, getting bratty and teasing him for a while is just about the only way to see the harsher side of what he could be capable of in bed. In a way, that can be quite enticing in its own right; what self-respecting brat doesn't just adore pushing their lover until their restraint cracks and they show what they can really do?
- He can tolerate and even laugh off a good amount of bratty behavior- you're his beloved after all, and your more feisty nature is refreshing, and part of what drew him to you to begin with. To a great extent, it could be assumed that he even enjoys indulging your more willful behavior. That said, Dimitri is also well aware of a certain measure of appearances that must be kept to maintain public opinion of him as King, so every now and then, an infraction of yours here and there may need to be punished. Sliding your hand up his thigh during a banquet with visiting nobles, or pulling him aside just before a meeting to whisper a few lewd words to deliberately rile him up will both result in a loving yet firm scolding later.
- For such every-day naughty behaviors, you're likely to be gently reprimanded, yet with the slightest hint that perhaps Dimitri enjoys your teasing a bit more than he lets on. Usually, he prefers to make love by easing into you, allowing you to adjust to his size gradually, and in a position where he can face you and enjoy your beautiful expressions and luxurious moans. When you've been pushing at him a bit, however, he'll turn you onto your stomach and snap his hips aggressively against you, stuffing you full of his cock and stretching you out around him. Though even as he steadily pounds into you, he nuzzles the back of your neck and murmurs, "Darling, you know that I can't withstand that sort of teasing..."
- In general, Dimitri is far more likely to coax you into behaving with promises of time together that night. He catches you rolling your eyes when he tells you he'll be meeting with a particularly irritating and arrogant member of the nobility that night, and he laughs, brushing your cheek, then kissing your forehead and saying, "I know his kind tend to test your patience, my love- but if you can be good for me and behave during our talks, I promise I will spoil you as much as you like this evening. Anything at all that you ask of me."
- It takes a lot to really break Dimitri's restraint- he wants so dearly to be kind and soft towards you. While he never wishes to strike you, even at your worst behaved (need I remind us, the man is fully capable of breaking bones by accident and he would never forgive himself if he did anything eve close to that to you), he will instead use his near-inhuman strength to manhandle you on his bed into any position he wants to fuck you in for a full night of punishment. Dimitri has a good deal of stamina and takes a while to cum to begin with, so when you need to be well and truly put in your place, he'll fill you with his cock over and over until you're an over-fucked, incoherent mess beneath him.
- He's not very talkative when punishing you- in fact, the worse you've behaved, the more Dimitri relies on primal grunts and moans, rather than words. The most you're likely to hear from him is a low, rumbling, "I am not finished with you yet," as he lifts your leg against his body, spreading you for him as he fucks into you, with you merely laying limp on your side. That all said, once he's sated for the night, he'll carry your trembling body to a hot bath and massage away any lingering aches and pains. He dotes on you and praises you for taking your punishment so well, and after how hard and deep he fucked you and how sweet your darling lover always is to you, it's hard to not want to behave for him.
Seteth:
- We're basically on the opposite end of the Dom spectrum here; Seteth is ready and willing to punish you to the fullest extent for any number of misdemeanors. I've said before that he thrives in power play, and I stand by that (though I do see him as a switch over all). There's plenty that gets under his skin- risky behavior that could bring you to harm, flagrant disregard for Monastery rules or decorum, and of course, teasing him during work. While to others, he may just stiffen and clear his throat, you'll always catch the spark of warning in his eyes, telling you silently that you're toeing a dangerous line.
- Seteth is more than comfortable with experimenting with you until he discovers the full range of what you can handle (and not-so-secretly enjoy) in a punishment session. He'll learn exactly how hard he can spank you, how firmly you want his hand around your pretty neck, and how deep you can take his cock. His usual style of punishment is stern and uncompromising, but fair, and you may even catch him slipping into his "school disciplinarian" voice as he lectures you about your unacceptable behavior, spanking you across his lap while forcing you to keep count of each strike.
- One of his favorite ways to put you in your place- especially if you've been pestering him during his work day- is to force you to sit still with his cock nestled deep inside of you while he catches up on the paperwork your antics distracted him from earlier. He'll remind you that it's your own fault that he's too busy to spend time with you now, then slap your thigh or your ass if you dare to try moving even an inch. Then, if you're very, very good for him and stay perfectly still until he's done, he'll lift you and carry you to his bed.
- Boy can Seteth compose a lecture, even in the bedroom. When you've been especially bad, he'll tie your wrists behind your back and force you to your knees. Then, as he pushes his impressive length into your throat, he'll go on about how shameful your behavior has been, how you're "evidently no better than some common whore," and so on. If you're the type who likes verbal degradation, Seteth is almost unintentionally a master in the field. It may even get to the point that overhearing him reprimanding a student at the Monastery intensely arouses you, simply because of how your body naturally responds to that tone of voice.
- Okay hear me out. Calling Seteth 'sir' completely by accident while he pounds you against the bed for being especially badly behaved. And it just does something to him that he was not prepared for. He's gripping onto the headboard for leverage and slamming his full length into you so hard you lose your breath. Your eyes roll back, and he's scolding you, but you can hardly even make sense of his words anymore, so you just mumble out, "Ye- Yessir..!" and he groans, grabs your hips in both hands and says, "Again. Louder."
#seteth#dimitri alexandre blaiddyd#seteth x reader#dimitri x reader#fire emblem#fire emblem three houses#fe3h#feh#fire emblem smut#fire emblem x reader#sub dom#bratty sub#fire emblem headcanons
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jealous
pairing — han jisung x reader
genre — angst (?)
tw — slightly suggestive (?)
wc — 3035
a/n — yall idk wtf this is im trying my best to get better at writing angsty (???) stuff so im really sorry if this is absolute trash T^T. feedback is appreciated !!
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you hadn't seen your brother, chan, for a long time, six months to be exact and of course you missed him dearly. when he called to tell you that he was coming home for a while you nearly cried of joy, however, the happiness faded when he mentioned that he'd be bringing his band mates, that meant changbin... and han jisung.
it wasn't exactly a secret that you didn't get along with jisung, and you never knew why. he always just irked you a bit, and on purpose too. it was constant bickering between the two of you, fortunately, chan and changbin had learnt to tolerate it. speaking of changbin, you actually quite liked him and he was rather fond of you too. chan knew this, in fact, chan saw all the underlying tension between you and the rest of 3racha. he was thankful that he was your brother, but he didn't have to intervene, he was fully aware that you could handle these things on your own. unless of course you asked for help, and in that case, he would go to war for you.
a sturdy knock hit the door a few times and you ran to the door, unlocking it.
"channie!!" you leaped onto him and hugged him tightly. he dropped his bags down to the floor just so he could hug you back. "i've missed you so much!" you said as you hopped down and picked up both of his bags.
he grinned, "i've missed you too, y/n."
your smile dropped almost instantly as you saw jisung leaning against the doorway, a smirk across his face that just made you want to slap him. faking a smile, you greeted changbin, "hey changbin! good to see you." he gave you a sincere nod and smile before picking up his suitcase. "now chan, shall i put these in the guest room?" you asked, chan was already going through the fridge, looking for food.
"mm." he mumbled. you took it as a yes and heaved his bags to the guest room, dumping them beside the bed. as you turned around to help changbin with his luggage, someone blocked your way.
"you didn't say hello to me?" jisung questioned, though, it sounded more like a statement.
huffing, you responded, "why would i?"
"because you love me," he said as he leaned in close. "and you missed me."
"you must be confused." you shrugged and pushed past him. that was too close for comfort. you thought as you walked out and picked up changbin's last bag.
"hey y/n," chan began, "what's for dinner?"
you sighed, "i'm gonna have to go shopping chan, i don't have enough food for all of you." you went to put your shoes on and a jacket too, since it was getting late and more chilly outside. "who wants to chauffeur me to the grocery store?" you joked.
"anything for you, my love." jisung said teasingly as he held his hand out to you.
"uh, i'd rather not." you swatted his hand away. "c'mon changbin, let's go!" you said while dragging changbin up from the sofa. he groaned, but honestly he didn't mind so much. he was just being a big baby.
the car trip was short and quiet, mainly because changbin was tired from all the travelling they had done to get to your house. plus, their schedule has been so full lately, they were lucky to have this time off.
wandering through isles, you began picking up ingredients and placing them intro a trolley.
"you really missed us?" changbin began, "me and chan of course..." he trailed off but a playful smile tugged at his lips.
"of course i am! jisung on the other hand..." you rolled your eyes, pushing the trolley along.
he chucked, "you really still hate each other? after all these years?"
you huffed, a little too obnoxiously, "yes. i do still hate him. and i'm sure he despises me too. i don't even know what it is... it's just... the way he treats me. he acts like he deserves my friendship, which he doesn't. it's something you earn."
"remind me to never piss you off." changbin laughed as he put a bag of chips in the trolley.
once you had everything you needed you put it through the register, changbin insisted he paid, since you were letting the three of them live with you.
shortly after you arrived home, you began cooking. while he wasn't the best, changbin offered to help as best he could. you actually thought it was really sweet. he passed you utensils, condiments and he even set the table.
meanwhile, chan was fast asleep in the guest room and jisung was showering in the provided ensuite. you turned to changbin and high fived him, "we're all done! i should wake up chan. you can start eating if you want." proud of his efforts, changbin sat down and began to eat.
gently pressing the door open to the guest room, you whispered, "chan? dinner is ready." you walked over to him and was about to softly shake him when jisung walked out of the bathroom, only a towel around his waist. his tousled wet hair dripped little drops of water down his chest and it was rather overwhelming to see him so exposed.
contrary to your thoughts, he couldn't care less, he enjoyed watching the way you panicked and blushed heavily. if this is what it takes. he thought.
"oh! um, jisung. i'm so sorry, i was just coming to tell chan that dinner is ready, i should've knocked or-" you blurted out in a quiet voice, weary of chan waking up.
jisung let out a low chuckle, "it's fine, y/n. i'll wake him up once i've dressed."
"thanks," you said as you went to leave, "wait... no snarky comment?" you puzzled.
he said nothing, just winked at you as you closed the door.
you joined changbin at the dinner table, sitting across from him. "how's the food?" you asked as you took a bite for yourself.
"y/n it's amazing! you're seriously a great cook. man, i wish i was this good." he said as he took a small bite of the spaghetti you had prepared.
at that moment, chan dawdled out the door and jisung closely behind. they joined you at the table and also began eating.
"don't worry about it binnie, i can teach you to cook, years of living on my own without chan seems to have payed off a bit." you joked.
"binnie?" jisung questioned the nickname you had given to changbin, whilst changbin sat there furiously blushing. he tried to hide it by lowering his head but that honestly seemed it give it away more.
"sounds cute." you shrugged, not thinking much of it.
chan cleared his throat, "okay so here's the plan for tomorrow," he began, taking another bite of spaghetti, "changbin and i have to go talk to JYP about an upcoming show we are doing, so we could be gone all day with that. there's lots to plan."
"wait a second, why am i not going? i'm apart of 3racha too." jisung stated.
changbin replied, "did you get the email from him?"
jisung shook his head, "well, no but-"
"then you're not coming." changbin grinned cheekily, knowing this upset jisung.
when everyone had finished with their meal, changbin stood up and collected all the dirty dishes, only to begin washing them in the sink. you quickly tried to stop him, "oh, changbin! don't worry i can do that." you said as you tried to take over, but he refused.
"no. you won't. dinner was great! you've done enough for today, if we are gonna be living here for the next few weeks then i might as well be of some use." he smiled at you before nodding to the tv, signalling for you to relax.
tired as ever, chan come over and kissed your head goodnight before going back to sleep. by now it was nearly 10pm, you had a late dinner but that was because they arrived later than expected.
you sat down on the sofa and began browsing movies. you decided to watch your favourite, even though you've seen it a million times. once he was finished with the dishes, changbin joined you on the sofa to watch the movie, you quickly filled him in on all the little details of the plot.
jisung was still sitting at the dinner table, scrolling through his phone, he was contemplating coming to join the two of you in watching the movie, but decided against it when he saw changbin put his arm around you. rolling his eyes and scoffing a little too loud, jisung stood up and went to the guest room he was sharing with chan. he tried his best not to slam the door but somehow that didn't happen.
"huh, wonder what's up with him?" changbin asked, looking at the door wide eyed. "i'll go check, sorry, i'll be back in a sec." he followed jisung into the guest room, you heard changbin quietly ask if he was okay.
what started as a whispered discussion soon became a hushed argument, you were worried that soon they would start yelling at each other. luckily chan was a deep sleeper, he also slept with earphones in, so you were pretty sure he wouldn't hear any of it.
the minutes passed and their quarreling continued, you debated going in there to try and make some peace but you decided against it, this seemed to be something personal between the two of them. instead, you switched off the tv and the lights, and went got ready for bed. as you were about to close your eyes you heard the jingle of keys and the sound of the door opening and closing. whoever it was, you knew they could take care of themselves, they were both adults and probably just needed some space.
when you woke up, it was around 7am. you quickly threw a hoodie on over your shirt, feeling a bit cold and walked into the living space to see changbin, sleeping softly on the sofa. it only just occurred to you that there wasn't enough beds for all of you in your current living situation.
you gently peeked into chan's room to see him sprawled out, sleeping a deep sleep. you smiled to yourself, knowing that he got all the sleep he deserved. the empty bed in the room didn't go unnoticed however.
it was jisung who left last night. and he didn't seem to be back yet.
slightly worried, you decided to cook up some bacon and eggs for when the boys woke up.
"morning y/n." you turned around to see changbin leaning against the kitchen counter.
you smiled, "morning! sorry if i woke you up, i'm just making some breakfast, you've probably got time to shower if you want to before you eat."
"serious? man, what did we do to deserve you?" changbin said looking at you sincerely.
you laughed lightly, "nothing, now go! and please wake chan up when you get out."
he just chuckled as he walked away and closed the guest room door behind him. you wondered if you should make enough breakfast for jisung, would he be back soon? if he wasn't, he could just re-heat it, you thought.
the last few pieces of bacon finished cooking so you begin buttering the toast, you made a lot knowing that chan has a big appetite and there was a good chance they wouldn't have time to eat today. your train of thought was interrupted once again by changbin.
"anything i can do to help?" he asked, he was dressed quite smartly, but you understood as he was going to console with JYP himself.
"nope! i'm just about done, plus, you wouldn't want to dirty your clothes," you said as you began serving breakfast.
"ah okay, i woke chan up, he wanted to have a shower so he shouldn't be too much longer." he said, "can i?" he asked, pointing to one of the cups of steaming hot coffee you set on the counter.
"of course!" you said. a question burned in the back of your mind and you wondered if you should ask or not. "uh, changbin..." you began.
changbin knew exactly what you were about to say, "he's okay, y/n. he just wanted some space." his eyes stared at the wall blankly. there was more to this than needing space.
"so.. why was he upset then? you guys had a pretty heated argument.."
changbin's eyes met yours, "i'm sorry you had to hear that." he took a sip of coffee, "we just had a bit of a disagreement, it happens all the time... you see, the thing is-"
"good morning to my favourite people!" chan said as he waltzed out of the guest room, also looking rather sharp.
you and changbin smiled at his enthusiasm, "morning!" the two of you chimed back.
"breakfast made? hot coffee? you seriously are the best sister in the world! it's like we're staying at a five star hotel." chan said picking up a mug of coffee.
you laughed, "i'm your only sister."
he shrugged, "still the best," he took a sip and hummed, looking around the room, "hey, where's jisung?"
"i don't know. i heard him leave last night." you said, placing two plates of food at the dinner table.
chan sent a red hot glare at changbin, knowing exactly why jisung would've stormed out. changbin looked away sheepishly.
"okay, well, breakfast is ready! eat up, you guys have a busy day." you said sitting down in front of a plate.
chan and changbin began discussing things for later with JYP, while you just sat their mindlessly eating your breakfast. you still couldn't help but wonder where jisung had went, and why he wasn't back yet.
you had completely zoned out and was just picking at the scraps of your plate when chan spoke, "well that was seriously great y/n! what a good way to start the day."
you smiled at your brother, "ah, it's the least i can do, maybe you could ask JYP if you can dedicate a song to me in return."
the three of you laughed and you began to clear up the plates while the boys finished getting ready. shortly after, they said their goodbyes and closed the front door behind them. although the door muffled his voice, you heard chan say to changbin, "you seriously fought over that again?"
you sighed to yourself, what were you going to do all day? you decided to finish cleaning up and have a shower.
you let the water run until it was warm before stepping in, you had to remember to be mindful because you often got carried away and distracted in the shower and lost track of time.
which is, exactly what happened, before you knew it you had been half an hour. shit, you thought. as you wrapped a towel around your body, you remembered jisung and how you saw a little too much of him after he showered. you blushed furiously just remembering it. that's when you realised that your feelings for changbin were just a deflection of the feelings you have for jisung. you're ridiculous, you thought. he hates you, despises you, enjoys making fun of you. you quickly ruled out the possibility of him ever returning the feeling and finished dressing.
you spent the day multitasking some of your studies while watching movie after movie, trying to be somewhat productive. your stomach suddenly growled and you checked the time, "must be time for lun-" you said aloud, "oh, it's 5pm." you laughed at your silly sense of time and how you had got carried away all day. but you soon frowned, 5pm and jisung still wasn't back?
since the boys weren't home you made yourself a light meal and sat at the dinner table alone, listening to some background music. it was actually quite relaxing. the evening golden sun shone through the window as you finished eating. you quickly began washing up your plate, when you heard the door creak open.
"oh, chan you're home! i just finished eating, but i can make something for you and changbin just give me a min-" but when you turned around to greet them, it wasn't chan or changbin. it was jisung. "jisung."
"are you gonna admit that you missed me this time? or do i have to leave for longer?" he smirked but you just sighed in relief. you hated to confess that you worried you wouldn't hear his stupid comments for a long while.
you spoke quietly, "of course i missed you. i was worried sick."
"oh? worried now?" he toyed.
"yes, worried! i heard you arguing with changbin and then you left!" you exclaimed.
his face turned away at the mention of changbin's name, "well sometimes changbin and i argue, it's normal."
you scoffed, "that's what he said."
"he told you?" jisung asked.
"no, he didn't tell me what you fought about, but it would seem that it isn't the first time because i heard chan scolding him after they left this morning." you admitted.
"they're not back?"
you shook your head, "nope," jisung looked away, "look, i just had dinner but is there anything you want?"
"yeah." he began.
"what would you like?" you asked.
"you." jisung said bluntly, catching you off guard. "and changbin wants you too."
it all made sense now. "oh, i, i see.." you said, quite taken aback. "jisung, it could ruin everything, we'd be playing with fire."
"i don't care, y/n." he said taking a few steps closer.
"but, chan is my brother." you said.
"he's my best friend." jisung countered, coming closer again.
"what about changbin?" you asked.
"he's also my best friend." at this point, jisung was standing face to face with you.
"hang on a second," you took a step back, hitting the counter, "i don't owe you anything." you whispered, pressing a finger to his lips.
he smirked, "but i owe you everything."
#han jisung x reader#han jisung#han#stray kids han#stray kids scenarios#han jisung angst#han angst#stray kids imagines#han jisung fluff#han jisung scenarios
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Hello :D everything ok?I wanted to ask you, how do you think MK11's men would react, his girlfriend is always affectionate with them, but out of nowhere she stopped being affectionate, after a while she tells them that she has pain in her stomach because of too much excitement, she thinks they are really sexy (her arms, legs, chest, all of them) and she wants to have intimacy but she was embarrassed. I adore you!!! Thank you!I adore Raiden and Fujin so much 😍
Mortal kombat Men x Female Reader
(Mind you all I'm a guy so I'll do my best to work this to the best of my ability I sadly don't have all the men but I'll do a few of the boys) if you guys would like more of them I'm happy to do a part 2 to this.
Mention of Sex, sex talks, nsfw mentioned, hinted sex scenes, romance and fluff.
Raiden
Raiden has never really been used to affection, not physical intimacy. But after he met his sweet S/O it became an almost constant contact, it takes him a while to get used to it but all up he loves it, he lose so much tension in his body. He loves having his S/o curled up on his lap, wirh them watching her trashy tv shows or him reading. It's something he has grown so accusation to over the time he's been with his lover. So for her to one day just stop it's almost painful for him. The first day he let's it slide thinking she's just having an off day but when it comes around too the second night. When she doesn't curl up beside him he sits up beside her. " My light?, are you well" he ask softly resting his hand on her shoulder, she turns to face him and smiles sadly. "I'm alright just in a little pain" he's filled with worry and basically scopes her up into his arms. "Do you need medical assistance" she laughs lightly pulling him down into a kiss. "I'm alright Raiden, my body sometimes hurts when I get too excited, I just... I love you alot, and I want to express it more" she explains. He's still worried that he is responsible for the pain she is in. "Is there anything I can do to help with your pain?" She thinks alright before replying. "Umm.. It's kinda embarrassing..." He smiles lightly as he holds her close. "You do not need to be embarrassed with me love" he presses a soft kiss to her forehead. "I... I want to be more intimate with you" "as in intercourse?" His lovers face goes bright red as she blushes. "Yes, but only if your interested" "We will take it slow, you will need to instruct me, as I have never done this before"
Fujin
Unlike his brother Fujin love physical contact from the start. This man gives amazing hugs and will quite literally sweep you off your feet. So he will realise very quickly when his S/o is distancing herself from him. "My love? care you alright, you haven't been as touchy as in used to you being, have I don't something wrong?" He will ask hoping he hasn't don't something to offend her. "I'm alright Fu, just in a bit of pain is all, sorry to cause you any trouble" she whispers. He's is quick to pull her into a hug, "Is it anything I can help with, I don't like seeing you in pain love" he says while gently holding her. They stand there Fujin holding his sweet love before she speaks up. "I get this pain when I get too excited and I really love you, your handsome and kind and I love spending every moment with you" she explains while resting her head on his shoulder. He holds her softly rocking back and forth lightly. "I wish to spend every waking moment with you my sweet sunshine, I'm yours" he says as he presses a gentle kiss too her forehead. He can see that she's holding something back, something which is bugging her. "My love, there's something else isn't there?, you can tell me, I will not judge." He reassures her. She looks to him and then to the floor them back to him. "I... I'd like to be more intimate with you if you would like, I.. you.. you make me feel safe when your around and would like to be yours if you will have me" she says shying away. Fujin smiles brightly leaning down to kiss her. "I would be honoured my love, we will take it at your pace, I do not wish to over step boundaries, you are very important to me." He tells her in a hushed voice. "I love you Fujin" "and I You my little sunshine"
Hasashi Hanzo
Hanzo has been thought hell and back literally, he's lost the only people he cared for before his S/o came along. It took him a long time to get used to so much affection, not to mention different in cultures and time. Alot has changed since he was first in earthrealm. Along with being the head of the Shirai ryu, there are alot of thinks he wishes to keep to himself, one of those is you. Although there are many among his students who know of you two he is still very hesitant of showing affection outside of you're home. He loves you very dearly and do not wish to lose one of the few things he holds dear.
But nothing gets past this man, he may not say it right away but he notices the first time you don't take a chance to hold him that day. He sees toy distancing yourself from him and it causes worry over anything. Had someone hurt you? And now he stand beside you in the fire gardens in the late evening. "Chīsana honō, are you well, I've noticed you have been avoid touching me, are you hurt?" Her eyes go wide as she looks at him. "No, no I'm not hurt but I am in pain, i... I get excited seeing you and being near you and sometimes it just hurts inside." She tries to explain to him. He moves closer gentle bring his hand up to brush away some stray hairs hanging in her face, wishing not to spook her. "Have I caused you pain?" She shakes her head before leaning onto his hand. "No, I...I just don't want to push you, I understand that Harumi meant the world to you, and I dotn want to replace her. But I do love you and I want you to be happy" she says as he pulls her close holding her gentle against his chest as they sway lightly in the brezze that rolls thought the fire gardens. "You will never replace Harumi, and I do not expect you too, I am very lucky to have had her in my life for the time I did, and I am so fortunate to have found you, I have been given a second chance at life, and it's one I wish to treasure as much as I can." His voice is soft and it's what his little flame needs to hear. They stand there for a little basking in each others warmth and company. "What brought this on fiery one?, you normally very vocal about your wishes. Have I done anything to dull your fire?" She shakes her head before resting it against his shoulder. "No, I just started thinking things, but do not want to push you, as much as I would love to be more intimate, I understand that you still morne and I do not wish for you to forget Harumi" she says lightly again. Hanzonsighs lightly "perhaps it is time that I do love on, she wa any first love and will always be in my heart, but you are my love as well and you are very dear to me sweet one"
Kuai Laing
Kuai is a little oblivious when it comes to romance not only wirh the way he was raised and how his brother acted when he was younger made the man quite shy in certain aspects and situations but when it comes to how his lover feels and realising they haven't touched him as much as they normally do is is a little concerned. Later that day he seeks them out in the comfort of his own home. He finds his little ice fairy sat on the couch curled up in blankets. He nearly falls face first into her lap as he crawls onto the loauge, something he was still getting used to. "Is it getting a little too cold to hold me now?" He ask lightly looking up into her eyes as he makes himself comfortable with his head in her lap. Her fingers twitch before giving in and running over his face and thought his hair. "No, no Kuai, just haven't been well kinda in a bit of pain" she explains lightly. He speaks up in concern. "Are you hurt?" "No just um.. getting to excited around makes my body hurt sometimes, I enjoy being close to you" she says reassuring him that he's done nothing and she isn't hurt. He sighs in relief as he runs a cold hand up to the side of her face smil ijng lightly as he plays with a small part of her hair. " Is there any way I can make up for such a pain I bring you?" She laughs lightly before smiling at him. "Come up here and kiss me would make up for it" he chuckles moving to sit up and pull here into a kiss, it's heated and sweet something they both enjoy. He pulls away resting his forehead against hers. "I hope that will suffice but I'm happy to give more " he replys. "For someone cold to the touch your fucking hot you know that" he laughs again pulling her closer go his body, wrapping them both up in that blanket. "I know I don't normally watch Television but tonight I just want t to be close to you so put on what ever you wish my little snowflake." He says placing more kisses on her skin. "God's I love you, you know" she smiles leaning up to kiss him again. "And I love you very, very much my sweet love, my little starlight and snow drop."
"Get over here, sweet talker"
Ft sub-zero Bi-han becuase I'm a slut for him
Bi-han did what he wanted most times, he had many lovers over time most were just to saite his desires, but his S/o was very much different form the many woman and men he had been with.
And it's the reason he wishes to take things slow. Even thought it is very much the opposite of how he normally was. He had aged out of his rebels teen years. And found someone that makes him feel complete. Bi-han is the less likely our of the bunch to realise his S/o is distancing herself from him. But when he does figure it out he is very handsy. "My soul, are you alright?, you have been avoiding me. Have I done something to anger you" he ask pulling her close to him resting his head over her shoulder as he wraps his arms around her stomach and pulls her against his chest. "I'm alright Bi-han just haven't been feeling well" she replys earning a rasied eyebrow from him. "Snowflake, are you pregnant?" Is the first thing that he ask. It's quite before She starts laughing lightly. "Bi-han, you haven't even slept with me and I don't exactly leave the house so if hope the fuck not" she says laughing as she leans back into him. "It made you smile, and I do so love it when you smile so brightly my love." He replys and leave small kisses agaisnt her neck. "But that is something I wish to speak to you about" she says turning around to face him. " Pregnancy?"
"No, that I would like you to sleep with me, Bi-han."
"And perhaps get you pregnant?" He jokingly jest . She lightly punches his shoulder. " Do you have baby fever that badly?" She ask looking up in to his eyes. "I just would love to see you with a child, you would make a beautiful mother my love, and perhaps baby fever is part of it too" he hums before pulling hsiblove in for another kiss. "Your a tease toy know"
"Just for you my snowflake"
#mortal kombat x reader#fujin mortal kombat#mortal kombat#mortal kombat raiden#mortal kombat imagines#mortal kombat scorpion#mortal kombat sub zero#raiden#raiden x reader#mk11 fujin#fujin x reader#hanzo hasashi#Hasashi Hanzo x reader#scorpion x reader#sub zero#sub zero x reader#mortal kombat bi han#bi han x reader#bi han#kuai liang#kuai liang x reader
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Your Age
Fandom: Harry Potter
Pairing: Jealous!Professor!Lupin X Legal!Student!Reader
Words: 1.3k
Warnings: Jealousy, teacher x student relationship, implied smutty ending. Oh and implied toxic parenting.
Summary: After a rough breakup, Y/N finally starts talking to men again. But this doesn’t sit right with her ex, Professor Lupin.
It was hard for the new DADA Professor to watch the girl he longed for be flirted with by somebody else, Draco Malfoy to be specific.
An uncomfortable feeling settled in his chest as he watched Y/N smile at the platinum-haired boy, her hand resting on his upper arm. She was blissfully unaware of the burning gaze that was fixated on her and the Slytherin.
“You have no right, Remus,” he mumbled to himself, extremely grateful that there was nobody within earshot to hear him talking to himself. “You broke it off with her. You’re too old.”
“Y/N, can you stay behind a moment, please?” Despite his lips being pulled up into a soft smile, his eyes held a different emotion.
“Sure, Professor!”
Once everyone had piled out of the room, Y/N’s friends saying they’ll see her in Potions, Remus finally broke the news.
“This can’t go on,” he sighed, running a hand through his hair. “There’s so many reasons why it can’t.” The pain in her eyes was something he would never be able to erase from his mind, no matter how much he wanted to get rid of it.
“Got ya,” she smiled, holding back tears. “Is that all, Professor?”
Hearing her use that title whilst they were alone struck a new type of pain in his heart and all he could do was nod.
“That’s all, Y/N.”
That was four months ago, and the Professor had never felt worse about anything. But he knew it was for her own good; he’s too old for her, at least in his mind.
Y/N had never known the reason behind his sudden distaste towards their relationship, instead being left to assume that he had met someone else; met someone his own age.
The first month had been the worst. Constant overthinking, skipping classes and the feeling over never being wanted again.
The second month things got better, not much but a bit. Her parents were still on at her, as they had always been, about finding a powerful wizard boyfriend. It didn’t matter either way. It isn’t exactly like she could have told them who she was seeing. It just stung more with her mother telling her if she doesn’t find someone now, she never will.
The third month was when things started looking up. She was feeling better, less insecure and was finally spending time with other men, most notable, Draco Malfoy. The sleepless nights were over, and she was beginning to feel better.
“Sorry I’m late,” Lupin rushed as he entered the classroom, hair messy and dark bags under his eyes.
Y/N’s hand dropped from Malfoy’s arm, falling to her side which didn’t go unnoticed by the DADA teacher; things like this made him feel happy yet guilty. She deserves better than an old professor in his eyes and she shouldn’t be sad about him leaving.
He caught the Y/H/C-haired girl’s eyes as she moved to take her usual seat in front of his desk. Usually, she would desperately avoid his sight, something that pained him, but it was different today. For what reason, he didn’t know, or at least he didn’t until Draco took a seat beside her.
“You look lonely, Y/N/N,” he smirked. “Want some company?”
“I’d love some,” she returned his smile, one Lupin longed to be directed at him once again.
*
It had been about a week since he had seen Y/N last, and he wished the first time that he saw her again hadn’t been like this.
Malfoy and she were leaning against the wall outside of him classroom, both unaware of his presence. They were talking about something, something that he couldn’t hear and he was about to interrupt them until he saw the blonde lean in and capture her lips on his own. Eyes wide, Lupin turned and left, not hearing or seeing what had happened immediately after.
*
“Look guys,” Seamus laughed, noticing the letter that Y/N had received mere seconds ago. “Y/S/N got herself a howler!”
Y/N, who was now blushing at everyones attention on her, let out a sigh and she unwillingly opened it, aware of the consequences if she did not. The entire halls attention was on her as it began to scream:
“Y/N Y/S/N! How dare you reject Lucius Malfoy’s son! Draco is a lovely young boy, how dare you break his heart like that? He was nothing but nice to you and you won’t even let him take you out on a date? How ungrateful are you? You’re nothing but a frigid little girl, no man will ever love you!”
“Okay mother,” Y/N muttered, watching as the letter tore itself up. “I think I’m going to go.” Were her final words, not waiting for her friends replies before leaving, not realising who had followed her.
*
Tears slipped down her cheeks as Y/N sat herself on the step outside of the Defence Against the Dark Arts classroom, somewhere she had come out of habit. She always ended up here when she was upset. Nobody was come, it was early morning on a weekend.
“Y/N?” A familiar voice sounded around the corner. Of course he knew exactly where she had gone. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine,” she was clearly lying, he knew her too well for her to lie to him. “I just want to be alone.”
A sigh left Lupin’s lips as he took a seat beside her, robe almost tripping him which would have been comical if not for the situation at hand. “She’s not right, you know?” He chimed in.
“What?” Y/N turned to face the man she was once involved with, only for him to already be looking at her. “What do you mean?”
“You’re not unlovable,”
Confusion enveloped her body as Remus took Y/N’s cheek in his hand, finger roaming the flesh. “I love you,” without hesitation his lips pressed gently against her own, not thinking of the consequences. He enjoyed the way she kissed back immediately, being too used to his lips against hers.
But she pulled back moments after. “No you don’t,” she said. “If you did you wouldn’t have gotten rid of me.” Her hand reached up to snatch his hand from her cheek, missing the pain that flashed across his face.
“Can we talk in my office?”
“I guess,”
And so she followed him, noticing how dishevelled he looked along with the locking of the door. Despite his messy look, he was still attractive.
“What is it?”
“I didn’t do it to hurt you. I didn’t do it for any reason other than wanting to protect you,” he admitted, flicking his wand to give her a seat as he took one beside her, tilting it so he could face her. “You need somebody your own age, somebody that won’t have to disappear once a month, someone that isn’t me.”
Y/N’s eyes widened at his confession, unsure as to how to respond. “But I don’t want anyone else. I love you and only you. You’re the only one I want.”
“I’m sure Malfoy would beg to differ. I’ve seen to way you two act.” He swallowed deeply, looking anywhere but her face.
“Are you jealous?”
The professor hesitated. “Yes, I want you to be only mine. I know that’s selfish but you’re all I can think about, you’re all I want. Hurting you was the last thing I ever wanted to do.”
His hand reached to grasp Y/N’s own, intertwining their fingers whilst he enjoyed the blushing. His spare hand reached for her cheek once again as he spoke. “Forgive me?” His breath fanned across her lips, having moved closer to her face.
“Always,” she pushed her lips against his, something she had missed dearly. “I missed you so much.” She murmured as he pulled her into his lap, her arms wrapping around his neck as they kissed.
“Me too, darling,” he groaned at the feeling of her pressing against his area. “Let me show you how much.”
#Harry Potter#Harry Potter x reader#Harry Potter imagine#Harry Potter imagines#Harry Potter fanfic#Harry Potter fanfiction#Remus Lupin#Remus Lupin x reader#Remus Lupin smut#Remus Lupin imagine#Remus Lupin imagines#fanfic#fanfiction#smut#teacher x student#Remus Lupin fanfiction#Remus Lupin fanfic#Lupin#Lupin x reader#Lupin imagine#Lupin imagines#Lupin fanfic#Lupin fanfiction#Lupin smut#Moony#Moony x reader#Moony imagine#Moony imagines#Moony fanfic#Moony fanfiction
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