#and I’m gonna have to talk to more people to get this situation sorted so
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Feeling Like Shit September Baby
#I had a good run there#I finally called a few places made a few appointments so hopefully I’m on my way to well. not shit September#but. ah. god.#im exhausted.#I can’t believe it’s gonna be over eighty again for like two weeks straight#and I’m gonna have to talk to more people to get this situation sorted so#I can get the certification I worked for#it really sucks to get kicked in the chest like this when I’m trying to do better but ok yes ok it’s fine#whatever !!!! it’s cool!!!#im trying so hard to just . figure it out. and keep the breaks and shit that I need to deal with that#but the Guilt#in good news though. I should be able to get this one problem sorted which would be nice
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i still feel like the money from the egg figures is gonna go to the eggmins, including lumi and shade and anyone else that has left/been fired [maybe with the exception of like, flippa and tilín’s original admins since they were only there for less than a month but who knows]
like i agree that the way quackity is going about things sucks, with his mindset being that because he doesn’t want to make promises he can’t keep he won’t say anything at all, but i don’t think it means the eggmins won’t be paid. i’d assume, based on what he’s said, that he’s waiting to see how much money the merch makes before he promises anyone any amount of money. which again. is dumb, because if that is the case he could still just Say That. but i don’t think it’s a baseless assumption at the very least
#.txt#discourse#qadmin situation#sorry if this is worded weird i’m like half asleep rn#i’m still keeping optimistic#i know quackity has fucked up a lot and will probably still continue to do so for a bit#and it is very frustrating#but i can also see that he’s trying#i think he needs to shift his mindset a bit and work more on actually talking to people#even if it’s just telling them to hold tight while he works through things#honestly if things don’t improve within the next few weeks i’ll probably get a bit harsher#because like. c’mon man. i know this is gonna take months to sort out#that much is obvious#but if he can’t at least improve communication soon it’s like#there’s only so much benefit of the doubt i can give#but for now i’ll hold on to hope that he can fix things#idk i have a lot of thoughts on this situation that i don’t think i can get across correctly#i’m not letting quackity off the hook but i’m also willing to give him more time before i start saying he’s like#an awful person or whatever#i mean i don’t think he is regardless based on what i know of him but ykwim
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Eventually (Coriolanus Snow x Reader)
Word count: 6.7k
Summary: Coriolanus could appreciate irony, but the one person he desires more than anything wanting nothing to do with him pushes him to new territory
Tags: (18+), cw: noncon, dark!coriolanus, deeply implied stalker!coriolanus, unreliable narrator coriolanus (boy is delusional tbh, no one is doing more mental gymnastics than him), pre-mentor era, obsession, unprotected sex, choking (only for like a second), virginity status undisclosed but as I was writing I began to imagine this being the first time for both of them—it’s not even implied tho, so do with that what you will
A/N: a character as evil as him I couldn’t conceive writing fluff for. he’s bad and guess what I’m not gonna fix him, but I also can’t make him not-hot so… hehe. please read the tags and proceed with caution <3
Misc masterlist + main masterlist
You wanted nothing to do with him, and that made him crazy.
No, if anything, you were the crazy one. Coriolanus hadn’t done anything but try to be your friend, but you snubbed him without reason.
Coriolanus did a good job at keeping the financial situation of his family a secret. No one knew, and he doubted you were an exception. Yet, it was as if you looked down upon him.
Although, you’d grown fond of Sejanus, so even if you did know, status wasn’t a concern of yours. It was something he admired, yet questioned all at once. There had to be a reason for your dismissal. A reason you couldn’t bring yourself to even offer a smile back. It’s not like he was asking a lot.
It’s not like he wasn’t trying, either. He’d gotten used to trying to make people like him, to see him as better than he was, but it was never this hard. It would’ve been so much simpler if you just told him to his face what your problem was, but whenever he came around, mostly when you were talking to Sejanus—they were friends, it was the perfect excuse—you just went quiet. You’d greet him, make no effort to continue the conversation, then excuse yourself.
All Coriolanus wanted to know was why.
“You’re watching her again,” Clemensia whispered to him, eyes flicking between him and the paper in front of her.
They were class partners, but Coriolanus was beginning to think he spent too much time with her.
“Who?”
Clemensia let out a small chuckle, mocking him. The professor at the front of the class looked up, and Coriolanus quickly looked down at his paper, taking his eyes off of you.
“You’re too obvious,” she muttered, a smirk in her voice. “Maybe that’s why she doesn’t like you. Because you stare at her too much.”
She didn’t get a response—it didn’t deserve one. Coriolanus questioned why he ever told her anything. She made him sound like some sort of stalker. Which, for the record, he was not.
His eyes managing to find you frequently wasn’t a crime, and neither was crossing your path. Maybe it wasn’t a coincidence most of the time, but it’s not as if he was harming you by watching you. He doubted you noticed anyway.
Seeing you nearly everyday had been enough to keep him sated, but then Sejanus started talking about you. Through no fault of his own, Coriolanus learned things about you. What he came to know made him curious to discover more. Even if you did not seem keen to let him.
Being content with what he had didn’t keep its appeal for long. Not when you were right there, your presence taunting him. Making him want what you would not let him have.
“You just need to talk to her, Coryo,” Tigris told him one evening, when he revealed everything to her. “Not in class and not with Sejanus. Just you. Let her know the real you and I promise she’ll like what she sees.”
Coriolanus took his cousin’s advice to heart. She was much more empathetic than him, she had to be onto something, right?
Everything changed when Coriolanus sat across from you at a study table in the library.
As beautiful as you were from a distance, being up close was something else entirely. He could admire you for hours and never get tired.
You looked up at him, he smiled and said hello just like Tigris advised. The smile you returned seemed forced, and you ignored that he had spoken.
It upset him, but not as much as when you got up and walked out. It was the last straw. Coriolanus was following you into the hall before he could think better of it.
He caught up to you, dropping his hand to your shoulder to make you turn around and face him. When you did, you looked surprised. That wasn’t what made Coriolanus hesitate, but the realization that he had never been this close to you before. Not even sitting across from you compared to touching you.
His heart skipped a beat.
“What do you want?” you questioned, a level of annoyance he thought to be unearned in your voice.
His heart started again.
“Have I done something to you?” Coriolanus confronted you, feeling a familiar sense of agitation creep over him. He had to know. “To make you feel such distaste for me?”
“I don’t dislike you, Coriolanus,” you replied, calmly after recovering from your initial shock. “I’m just… indifferent to you.”
The answer confused him more than it did enrage him. He smothered the latter feeling as he observed you.
“You’re… indifferent,” he stated, not asking. His feet shifted beneath him. It hurt, for some reason. “Why?”
Your eyes narrowed ever so slightly, studying him. It was the same way you’d look at your books when you were struggling with a subject, lingering behind in class or the library until a triumphant smile crossed your face.
Only, that smile never came. Your expression just faded back to normal.
“You shouldn’t put so much weight on what other people think of you,” you advised, stepping closer to him. His breath caught in his chest. You smelled sweet, like flowers. “Especially not someone you don’t even know.”
It was then, he realized, you hadn’t moved closer to him with purpose. You’d been on your way moving past him. His eyes focused on your back as you walked away, figuring out what to say.
“I’d like to know you,” he announced earnestly, verbally trying to pull you back. “If you’d only give me a chance.”
You slowed to a stop, looking over your shoulder. Coriolanus felt as if he was on display as your eyes raked over him, determining for yourself his sincerity.
“You’re friends with Sejanus, aren’t you?” you wondered. It wasn’t what he expected, but Coriolanus nodded. You sighed, which irked him to think it was pity. “If you’d like to join us for lunch I wouldn’t be against that.”
“I’ll see you then,” he said, but you were already turning away. He kept to himself that he had already tried in the past.
His friend was nice. Too nice for his own good, truthfully. It wasn’t as if Sejanus completely abandoned him the moment he befriended you. It was more like he split his time, attending to both friendships. The only thing Coriolanus held against him was that he never tried to reintroduce the two of you. Maybe even put in a good word.
At lunch Coriolanus found you and Sejanus quickly, he knew where you liked to sit.
“Hey, Coryo,” Sejanus greeted, smiling. “About time you decided to join us.”
Coriolanus put on a smile as he sat down. “Well, I would’ve sooner, but I wasn’t sure I was welcome before.”
The comment made you smirk, in on the joke as Coriolanus looked at you.
“Who’s to say you are now?” you sarcastically replied, as if you hadn’t been the one to invite him.
Well, “invite” was being generous, but he still seized the opportunity nonetheless.
“Ignore her, she can’t help herself,” Sejanus said with a chuckle, used to your humor.
This time, when he tried to talk to you, you engaged. In between discussions of classes and assignments, Coriolanus had to dodge your quick wit.
He liked the challenge, and the next day, he went back for more. Even walked right past Clemanisa and Arachne, who tried to invite him to their table with Festus. You were waiting for him.
He noticed you and Sejanus already talking.
When he sat across from you, you raised your brows. “Seeking refuge?”
Before he could ask what you meant, you nodded your head towards the girls he’d left behind.
You knew about his friends?
“You could call it that,” he replied, a smile starting to appear.
You nodded and hummed.
“Well, what are your qualifications?”
“Excuse me?”
“You joke too much, Y/N,” Sejanus lightly scolded you, interrupting whatever path you were going down, which made you laugh. “He’s going to think you don’t like him.”
“He knows I don’t mean anything by it,” you assured, looking at Coriolanus. “I’m just trying to figure him out.”
Your tone was filled with confidence, but your face… Coriolanus wasn’t sure how to place your underlying expression. You had a shield up, he knew that much, but what did that have to do with him? Were you trying to figure out if you could let it down for him? Or something else?
“Of course,” Coriolanus answered, not taking his eyes off of you. “I’m an open book.”
“Are you, now?” You folded your arms on the table. “Your friends love to gossip, and I don’t think I’ve heard that about you.”
“It’s not my fault if they don’t know how to read,” Coriolanus quipped, proud of himself for being so quick.
None of his friends had wronged him, but the joke at their expense was worth it for what followed after.
He made you laugh. Not just smile, but truly laugh. It was exactly what he wanted, and it actually worked. Awe didn't begin to describe how it felt.
Joining your table for lunch became the best part of his day. Sometimes he forgot Sejanus was even there, far too eager to see you. He saw you all the time, of course. Watching you was a habit he had yet to break, but this was different. You were aware of his presence, and he was able to speak to you. It didn’t matter that you still seemed weary, it was enough.
Even if you didn’t like him, you still had conversations with him, so that was something.
Sometimes, if you were deep in a discussion, debating ethics—your favorite topic—it would continue beyond just the table. He’d walk you to class, wanting to hear your voice just a second longer.
“I want to meet this girl,” His grandmother declared one night, after Coriolanus drifted to the topic of you over dinner. He’d been doing it more recently.
Tigris gave him a look, a light frown. There was no way to do that without you coming to his home, and he wasn’t going to let that happen.
“Let Coryo decide that, Grandma‘am,” Tigris insisted, patting the older woman’s shoulder.
“Well, he has feelings for Y/N,” she argued, looking at Coriolanus. He used your name enough that she remembered it. “And she likes him too—doesn’t she?”
Coriolanus gave a tight smile. “Yes, she does.”
Keeping up appearances.
“Well, that settles it, then,” Grandma‘am decided.
“I think it’s time you get to bed,” Tigris intervened, getting their grandmother up from her chair.
Later, when they were alone, Tigris asked him, “Does she even know how you feel about her?” She knew him too well. He took too long to answer. “You should tell her. From what you’ve told us, you two should be together. But it won’t happen unless you make it known how you feel.”
Coriolanus’s dreams were filled with you, as they usually were, but something was different the morning he woke up after the conversation with Tigris.
All he had to do was prove himself to you, and he knew that now.
Coriolanus found you in the library a lot, often pretending to stumble upon you. This time, he didn’t put on a facade.
“I thought I’d find you here,” he acknowledged, sitting down beside you. Often he’d sit across, but he was testing the waters. Seeing if you were put off by the proximity. “Studying for Featherly’s class?”
“I’m terrified for his test,” you confided, rubbing your temples as you hunched down at your book. “I feel like my mind has no room for anything else. I’ve memorized nothing.”
With a sigh, you sat up and pushed the book away.
“I can help you,” Coriolanus insisted, reaching for the book. He read over the page you were on, knowing he’d already perfected the subject. “You should’ve asked for me sooner.”
Maybe it was a little spiteful, but he hadn’t purposely meant it to come out that way. You still noticed it, taking your book back.
“I’m not asking for your help now, Coriolanus,” you muttered, looking at him out of the corner of your eye.
You were the last of his friends to still call him that. Most everyone else called him ‘Coryo’. Not you. But you were stubborn in many ways. This too, apparently.
“I didn’t mean anything against you,” he said lightly, even chuckling a little. It was forced, but he wanted to show he wasn’t being that serious.
Using your own words on you did not have the desired effect.
“Mmmhmmm,” you hummed.
Coriolanus tilted his head down, trying to get you to meet his gaze. You gave in, facing him, looking unamused.
He wanted to wipe that look away, but didn’t know how. If he could just make you like him—
Suddenly, your watch began to beep.
“Test time,” you grumbled, taking back your book and getting up.
Coriolanus followed you down the hall and into class. The tests were already on the desks, waiting. You two were early—he noticed that because of the clock on the wall.
He walked you to your seat and wished you good luck. To his surprise, you offered the same in return. Then, he went to his own. Other students filed in quickly after, professor Featherly being the last to enter the room.
The professor declared, “Begin,” then sat at his desk in the middle of the room and began to read.
The test wasn’t easy, but Coriolanus knew what he was doing. One look around the classroom and he saw that wasn’t the case for most other students. He felt a sense of pride, until his gaze landed on you. You were one row down and four seats to the left. He’d counted before. You were fiddling with your pencil, struggling to come up with what to write down.
While he could’ve been the first to finish, Coriolanus let other students turn their tests in before him. An hour passed by, but it moved quickly.
There were only a few students left when you finally got up. You radiated an anxious energy, much like the others, but Coriolanus didn’t care about the others.
Clemensia stuck her hand up in the air, waiting for the professor to notice her, distracting Coriolanus briefly. When the professor looked up and noticed her, Clemansia got her wish.
Coriolanus considered himself lucky, convincing himself with his own mantra frequently. As he watched you leave your test on Featherly’s desk and rush from the room, he realized how he could help you.
He quickly marked down the rest of his answers, having stalled so he could leave when you did. The professor was making his way away from the desk, while Coriolanus got up and went in the opposite direction.
With a swift, hard kick to the leg, the professor's desk wobbled and papers spilled off on the other side. It looked like an accident.
Featherly looked over his shoulder at the noise.
“Sorry,” Coriolanus apologized, kneeling down behind the desk to collect the papers.
Without anyone watching, he found your test. He had no time to change the written questions, but he made quick work of erasing and re-doing the multiple choice, with his own test and knowledge as reference.
He had to give you credit for getting a decent amount correct, but not enough for a passing grade.
When Coriolanus fixed that, he stacked together the papers and placed them back on the desk and exited.
Everyone was waiting in the hall. Against tradition, the professor graded tests directly after and would call students in to give the results. It was time consuming, and kept everyone on campus after hours, which was against the rules, but perhaps he’d gotten some kind of exception.
You were leaning against the wall opposite of the classroom, talking to some girl from the class—Coriolanus didn’t bother to learn her name. He wanted to go to you, but Sejanus got to him first instead.
“How do you think you did?”
Coriolanus shrugged, looking down at his friend. “Fine, I think.” That was the humble answer, right? “How about you?”
“Not perfect, but I passed.”
Clemensia trotted out then, a confident look on her face.
“What was so important you had to ask during the test?” Coriolanus couldn’t help but wonder. She’d unknowingly helped him, after all.
“Just clarity on a question, wanted to make sure I got it right,” she answered with ease.
“And did you?”
She gave Sejanus a look.
“Yes, of course.”
The last person exited the class, and professor Featherly closed the door. And so the grading began.
One by one, the professor called people in. There was no method to the order, it seemed likely he shuffled the papers or chose which one to grade next at random.
Time passed, Coriolanus didn’t know how much exactly, but it was beginning to get dark outside. Tigris would be worried until he got home, but she’d understand. His studies came first.
Eventually, Coriolanus realized it was dwindling down to be just you and him left. He was lucky today.
The third to last student was in the classroom, leaving you across the hall from one another.
You pressed your lips together before speaking.
“Do you think you did alright?”
The corner of Coriolanus’s lip twitched up at the sound of your voice.
“Yes, I think so,” he answered humbly. “What about you?”
You let out a self deprecating laugh. “When I said I was terrified, I wasn’t being dramatic.” You sighed, accepting your fate. “I’ll have to do perfect on the next one, I guess.”
“I can help you with that,” Coriolanus offered.
The smile he gave you spawned a mirror reaction. He knew he was charming, he had to be, and this time you actually seemed receptive to it.
“Maybe you can.”
The sound of a door opening made Coriolanus turn. Arachne was leaving, a smug look on her face as she thanked the professor.
Then the door closed, and the professor graded another test. There were only two left.
“I wish he wouldn’t do it like this,” you filled the silence. “The others don’t make us wait like this.”
“It builds suspense, I suppose,” Coriolanus mused. “Keeps us on our toes.”
“That’s not something I need right now.”
“At least you have good company,” he noted flirtatiously. He couldn’t help but grin at his own words, especially when you bite your lip to keep yourself from smiling.
“Could be worse, I supposed,” you retorted.
More time passed. The door opened again.
“Coriolanus Snow,” the professor addressed him next. “Your turn.”
As expected, Coriolanus did close to perfect. One answer off. Best in the class.
Back in the hallway, when he was done, Coriolanus waited with you. He didn’t announce he was staying, he just returned to his spot against the wall.
“Don’t keep a girl waiting. How did you do?” you asked, departing from the wall.
Coriolanus wondered where you were going, but then, you stood next to him, leaning back against the wall. There was still an arms length between the two of you, but it was something. You’d gone to him for once.
“You’ll think I’m full of myself if I tell you,” he teased lightly, which made you roll your eyes.
“Maybe I already think that, so just tell me,” you insisted.
The comment made him falter.
“Best in the class,” he divulged.
You almost looked impressed. “Good for you.”
The door opened.
“Y/N L/N, you’re up.”
“Wish me luck,” you said under your breath before following Featherly in.
“Good luck.”
Coriolanus waited for you, just like before. He tapped his foot. The professor didn’t actually go over the answers, he just told you the grade. You’d have no way of knowing what he did for you, but he’d be there to share in your excitement when you discovered how well you’d done.
Or, how well he’d done for you.
Not long later, you and the professor exited the class together.
“Wasn’t expecting you to still be here,” Featherly addressed Coriolanus. “You should get going. I’ll see you in class tomorrow.”
Then, he left you and Coriolanus alone in the hall, presumably leaving the building.
“So,” Coriolanus began with a smile. “How did you do?”
“He asked if I’d been studying with you. Apparently we had all the same answers,” you told him, crossing your arms. “Except when I asked him to show me my exam—which I did great on, apparently—I saw answers circled that weren’t mine.”
Coriolanus hadn’t expected you to find out so quickly, but a part of him was relieved you did. It meant he got to take credit, and he could show you that he really did want the best for you.
Or, he could always lie.
“You weren scared of failing,” he finally admitted. He offered a sympathetic smile. “So I helped.”
“No, you cheated!” you accused, causing his eyes to go wide. “You’ve implicated us both. If anyone finds out…”
“Don’t be so loud,” he hissed out in a whisper, stepping closer to you. The professor could still be in the building. He doubted anyone else would be. “I just wanted to help you, okay? You needed it, so I—“
“You helped, I get it. But I didn’t ask you to do that for me, Coriolanus. I have never asked you to do anything for me,” you sneered, somewhere between offended and betrayed.
He saw the way you scanned his face—his eyes. The pleading was beginning to seep through.
A wave of realization washed over you before he even opened his mouth.
“You didn’t have to ask me to,” Coriolanus said meaningfully, stepping closer to you. “I wanted to. I wanted to help you.”
You back hit the wall. The hallway was so empty it seemed as if the subtle sound still echoed.
“I’d do anything for you, don’t you get that?”
The sound of a large door closing carried from a distance.
Coriolanus reached for your face, wishing he could take away the concern that riddled your expression. Instead, he brushed a stray piece of hair from your face.
You swallowed. Why did you look so nervous around him? You were friends now, weren’t you? You never looked scared around anyone else. Why him? Why now? His own questions frustrated him.
“We’re not supposed to be on campus after hours,” you said calmly. It was the same tone you used when you first described your indifference to him. Coriolanus thought about that moment a lot. “Featherly already left. We should leave before we get caught.”
The corners of his lips twitched down.
“We’re still talking, though, aren’t we?”
You let out a shallow breath. You had no reason to look as scared as you did.
“I think we’re done.”
Coriolanus thought back to his cousin’s advice. He could’ve followed it better if she’d written it down, perchance.
“You’re so beautiful, you know that?” Coriolanus pondered, smiling to himself at the sight of you. “You caught my eye from the beginning and I—I couldn’t figure out why you wanted nothing to do with me.” You watched him carefully. He wondered if you could sense the dejectedness brewing. “Did you see something in me? Is that it?”
“I don’t know,” you admitted under your breath. “People like you, and you’ve been making an effort to be my friend, so I don’t know what told me to stay away from you, but something did. I’ve tried to ignore it, but I still…” you swallowed. “I don’t know.”
The confession should’ve been a relief. That’s what he imagined it would be. That you would admit the truth, and he could fix whatever misconceptions you had.
Coriolanus did not know what to do with “I don’t know”.
Staring down at you, Coriolanus noticed your back was against the wall. Literally. He hadn’t meant to put you there, but he had.
It got you to listen, didn’t it? He’d gotten an answer?
“Can we start over?” Coriolanus suggested, even throwing in a smile that would charm most anyone. It worked on you before. “We can forget all this mess.”
You blinked. You didn’t believe him.
For most people, he wouldn’t simply let numerous slights go, but for you, if it would fix whatever this was, if it meant the two of you could have a real chance, then he’d overcome his instincts—old and new.
“I’m afraid my memory is too good for that,” you finally said, looking up at him with defiance.
Defying what, was the question. It wasn’t as if you were enemies.
The thought made his jaw clench. He let out a laugh that was sharp. It lacked any sense of humor.
“Why can’t you just accept my apology?”
Your brows arched up, questioning him.
“That was supposed to be an apology?”
“Yes,” he confirmed. “But it’s not as if I owe you one.”
“I never said you did. I never said anything. You took it upon yourself to insert yourself into my life and now you are not happy with your place in it. You’ve overstepped, and you need to let me leave.”
Coriolanus frowned.
“You act like I’m keeping you here by force.”
You look up at him, silently telling him you believed he was.
That frustrated him further.
In an act that jarred even him, Coriolanus pressed his palms against your shoulders and pushed you back against the wall when you tried to move away.
“This is force,” he declared sternly, leaning down, making you maintain his gaze.
Everyone liked control, but he hadn’t used it in such a physical way before. It thrilled him in an odd way.
“Get your hands off me.”
“Why should I? You already think so poorly of me, why not let you be right?”
You moved again then, trying to catch him off guard and squirm away. But Coriolanus was quick to shove you back against the wall.
“We can still start over. If you would give me a chance, I think we can be good together.”
He let one hand rise to rest on your cheek. Your skin was so smooth. He inhaled deeply, resolve slipping further as his eyes fell to your lips.
If Coriolanus could just prove it to you, he was sure you’d understand what he meant.
He leaned in cautiously, gauging your reaction. You didn’t flinch away. You tilted your chin up, even. That familiar skip of his heart returned.
Coriolanus’s lips only just brushed against yours before you reacted. He had a second of relief before you brought your knee up, jabbing him in the lower stomach, although he doubted that was where you were aiming. It was still enough of a shock to throw him off his game. He stumbled back, and in a flash, you were gone. You were running down the hall—trying to get away from him, like usual.
Only this time, he didn’t feel like letting you go.
Something he had slowly come to learn was when he wanted something, it wasn’t just going to be handed to him. Vying for the Plinth Prize highlighted that, alongside his childhood.
He caught you easily, hand snapping out like a snake to grip your arm and yank you back to him. You collided with his chest. It was like you weren’t even trying. Not really. Just toying with him.
“Am I a game to you?” Coriolanus hissed into your ear, wrapping you in his arms. “Something for you to play?”
“I haven’t done anything to you! I hardly even know you!” you defended, but it just made him hold you tighter.
“I know you,” he implored, fighting against your squirming. He lost balance and when you fell to the ground, you took him with you. Coriolanus got you onto your back, sitting on your thighs, gripping your wrists in his hands to keep you from swinging at him. You let out panicked breaths, staring up at him. “I know more than you think.”
Something about the position made the front of his pants begin to feel constricting.
“Coriolanus, you’re frightening me,” you enunciated, as if trying to reason with him.
“I’m not being unreasonable,” Coriolanus grit out, working to maintain his composure.
“What?” you questioned, brows pinching together, a deep frown on your face. Confused and scared. Coriolanus used to feel that way. “Just let me go.”
“And then what? You go back to ignoring me? No I can’t… I can’t go back to that. If you just give me a chance I can show you.”
Coriolanus didn’t know what happened next.
Tigris told him it was like he left his own head, sometimes. She said he’d get so caught up, he wouldn’t notice things. At the time he had laughed. If anyone stayed aware, it was him.
It wasn’t that he left his head, but got lost in it. Lost in his own inner monologue to realize what he was doing.
In this case, what he’d done.
Far too busy thinking of ways to convey everything he wanted to say to you, how to make you understand, visualizing your reaction, he’d already acted.
Maybe there were two people living in his mind. One with a conscience, one without. Or perhaps that was just something he used to justify his less than decent actions. An excuse. He’d never let himself know the truth. Not really. Not yet.
What he did know was what he could see. You, beneath him, clothes torn from your body. The only thing left was a shirt. Too much effort, apparently. Your wrists were snatched together in one of his hands.
The power stirred something within him.
One might say he was out of excuses when he reached for the zipper of his pants, but no one else was here, were they?
Your mouth was moving. Speaking. Maybe even yelling. Looking at him, looking around the room. He couldn’t hear a sound but his own heart thumping in his ears paired with his own eager breaths. Was that normal?
He moved, wedging himself between your legs, nudging them apart to make room for himself.
“It’s just us,” Coriolanus spoke, loud enough to hear himself. You flinched. “No one’s here.”
He gripped himself, stroking his cock, lining himself up with your entrance. His patience was running incredibly thin.
Tears pricked in your eyes. You stopped struggling at his words, accepting it for what it was. Good.
“Why are you doing this?”
He heard your voice clearly, that time, despite the strain in your tone.
Coriolanus observed you carefully, squeezing your wrists together in one hand and lovingly caressing your hip with the other.
He finally understood the answer you’d given before. He found it fitting now.
“I don’t know.”
To him, it was the truth.
The moment Coriolanus pressed himself inside of you, it was as if the rest of the world disappeared. After so long of wanting you in every way, shape, or form, this was long overdue.
“You’re perfect for me,” he breathed out. Coriolanus gave a shove of his hips, his gaze falling to your mouth as an unwilling yelp slipped out. “I knew you would be.”
You were tight, too tight, even. Unwelcoming. Yet still, you felt like home.
His hand—the one that was on your hip—drifted between your legs. He found your clit, running his thumb in small circles, trying to ease the pressure you must’ve been feeling.
Coriolanus did not want to hurt you.
He looked into unfocused eyes. Where were you? Were you trying to be somewhere else?
He let your hands go. You didn’t move to slap him or shove him or anything. You were learning.
He leaned over you more, reaching for you face with his now free hand, and ran his thumb over your cheek, encouraging your gaze to actually meet his. He smiled softly when you did. You got more beautiful every second he looked at you. It was even better when he could see you were present.
Coriolanus found himself unable to resist it, so he gave into the urge to press his lips to yours. A real kiss, this time.
Your lips were softer than he’d imagined. You made a noise when his tongue tasted your mouth. His kiss was hungry—aggressive, even. But he’d waited so long he didn’t know how to contain himself.
Your body reacted to his touch. Your bent knees inched up his hips to accommodate him, and your walls were becoming slick, accepting the invasion.
A deep moan escaped him, cock throbbing inside you at the feel. The sound was muffled by his lips pressed to yours, but he still felt vulnerable, giving himself to you in this way.
Coriolanus pulled back from the kiss, only to rest his forehead against yours and breathe out a small puff of air from his lips.
“I’ve never wanted anything as much as I want you. Not even the Plinth Prize,” he confessed in a whisper.
“What’s the difference?” You finally spoke, voice wavering. “You have to earn the prize?” The accusing tone felt like a slap.
“You don’t know what you’re saying,” Coriolanus muttered, eyes boring into yours. “You’ll see.”
He gave you one more searing kiss before moving his hips.
A gasp that morphed into a moan clawed its way up your throat. The sound was like music to his ears. He wanted to hear it again.
He began to move more consistently, finding a pace that suited him. Rough enough to keep you present, but not so harsh as to hurt you. He wanted you to enjoy yourself, even if you were trying to avoid it.
Still figuring you out, Coriolanus found your sweet spot with a hard thrust, causing you to wince. Instinctively, you tried to push him away, just like you had before, not wanting to surrender.
You stilled when you felt his hand. He hardly realized how he’d reacted until he felt your throat bob beneath his palm.
Coriolanus retracted his hand, like your skin and shot a volt through him. His movements slowed to a stop.
“I’m sorry,” he apologized earnestly, brushing the hand through your hair gently. “I shouldn’t have done that.”
Your chest heaved as you breathed shaky breaths through your nose. Your lips pressed together in a line.
You weren’t going to dignify him with a response. In a way, he understood.
Coriolanus locked his arms under your body and in a surge of strength, pulled you from the ground and into his lap. He hugged you against him, nuzzling his face into your neck.
“Forgive me,” he requested softly.
You shifted in his lap, adjusting yourself to find comfort in the new position. You did not speak.
He slammed his hips up, forcing a gasp from your lips. That was something, wasn’t it?
You pulled back, and he did it again. And again. And again.
You fell against him, jarred by the change in his movements as he thrust into you. He liked it, feeling you in his lap, your chest against his, leaving you no choice but to hold onto him.
His lips latched onto the skin of your neck as he moved, barring his teeth and nipping the skin. You reacted as if he were venomous, straining away from him, but he’d left his mark.
You could pretend all you wanted that you didn’t like him, but Coriolanus could feel your body reacting to his. He could feel the way your walls squeezed around him, drawing him in, and how your body quivered as he pushed you closer to your edge.
“Just let go,” Coriolanus whispered, holding you tighter. He cradled the back of your head against him as he moved inside of you. Soothing and rough at the same time. “It’s okay, I know you want to.”
“Shut up,” you hissed into his neck, hands finding his chest.
Were you really going to try and get away from him? It was a bit late for that.
Coriolanus moved his hand between your bodies, finding your clit with the pad of his thumb, speeding along the process.
“What was that?” he taunted, feeling your legs start to shake.
A moan tore from your throat as you came around him, body slumping against his as he shoved himself deeper inside you. He wanted to feel your body tensed around him.
“That’s it,” he drawled, pressing his face to the side of your head. He inhaled, letting your scent flood him. Every sense was overwhelmed by you and if anything, it made him hunger for even more.
You became more pliable in your daze, going easily when Coriolanus laid you back down on the cold ground. He planted one hand on the ground near your head, where he held most of his weight, while the other rested on the base of your neck. Not squeezing, just resting. Reminding you of before.
Now that he’d taken care of you, made you realize the pleasure he could inflict upon you, it was his turn. Coriolanus was relentless with the thrust of his cock inside you, stretching you around him, groaning with nearly every movement. You felt so good, he never wanted to leave the warmth of your body.
You shifted beneath him, squirming as the intense feeling. Coriolanus was tempted to drag it out, to watch your face as the pleasure became too much for you to handle.
If it wasn’t for the desire to fill you, to claim you, he would’ve. There would be more times after this, he’d ensure it. He didn’t own a lot, but he treasured the things that he did.
“I can’t let you go, not now.” He meant to keep it inside his head, but the words spilled out. “You’re the only thing I want.”
At that moment, it was true.
Coriolanus gave one final shove of his hips before spilling inside of you. It crashed over him in an unexpected wave. His whole body shivered with pleasure at the feel of your body milking him. You wanted him. Your denial would eventually fade. He was sure of it.
Coriolanus let out a heavy sigh of your name as he watched your face. You’d turned your head, wincing as he filled you to the brim.
“Hey,” Coriolanus said when he finished, voice low. He ran a delicate hand over your face, persuading you to open your eyes. “We’re okay.”
As much as he didn’t want to, Coriolanus withdrew from you. You’d given up fighting against him, so he took the opportunity to help you redress. You were so pliant, it was like dressing a doll.
You rested your arms on your knees when he made you sit up. He wasn’t keeping you from moving from the floor, you chose not to.
Coriolanus watched you cautiously, searching for the same fire in you before, trying to figure out if he’d somehow snuffed it out.
There was a nagging in his gut. It was only for a brief second, but his confidence wavered.
“Can you talk to me?” he pressed, laying a hand on your shoulder and he knelt across from you, pants readjusted.
It was as if nothing happened, but you both knew that was untrue.
“Why should I?” You wrinkled your nose as you focused on the ground.
“Because, I care about you,” Coriolanus replied without thought, gaze softening. “I want to make sure you’re okay.”
“I don’t think you care for me,” you said in a tone so hushed, Coriolanus wasn’t sure if you even meant for him to hear. Then, you met his eyes. The fire had only been dulled, not put out. “I think you’re a liar, Coriolanus Snow.”
His hands fell to clasp yours. He brought one to his lips, pressing a small kiss to the back of your palm. You eyed him as if he were some sort of predator, but he managed a smile nonetheless.
“Let me prove it to you, and you’ll come to learn you’ve been wrong about me all along.”
#coriolanus snow x reader#coriolanus x you#coriolanus x reader#coriolanus snow#dark!coriolanus snow#yandere coriolanus snow#the hunger games#the ballad of songbirds and snakes#tom blyth#quin-ns writing
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I have to speak my peace about Captain Curly
Warning: mouthwashing spoilers
So, I’ve noticed a lot of people saying the same points that are essentially: “Oh Curly is a piece of shit because he just let his buddy get away with assaulting Anya”
And I am here to argue against this point. So at no point does Curly deny, or tell Anya that what she went through never happened, or anything like that. Usually, when somebody “supports their friend” after said friend commits assault, they will react with disbelief, or just general distrust for the person accusing their friend. I feel like the fact that Anya continuously makes small references to the assault situation around Curly, and the fact she talks and is alone with Captain Curly so often, are indicators that she has not been met with disbelief or distrust on his end.
When a victim receives a bad reaction to telling somebody about their assault, they usually do not bring it up or talk about it with that person after that. They also would not have the same dynamic, the same relaxed mannerisms that Anya has with Curly.
Now, onto the point where people accuse Curly of enabling Jimmy, I also don’t think that’s true. They are stuck on a relatively small ship, with no way out for over a year. They can’t risk hurting or punishing Jimmy, because Curly of all people will know how reactionary and violent Jimmy can be. They can’t kill him, because that’s illegal, and Curly is unfortunately responsible for Jimmy considering he is the Captain of the ship. Aside from the fact that, with the way Pony Express is shown to treat the crew, if they harmed or killed one of their own crew members it’s entirely possible that they would not get paid at all, and all the work and time and energy (and suffering, on Anya’s part) would literally be for nothing. Then they also get tried for murder, and they would have to prove that Jimmy did something wrong, they would have to prove that Jimmy assaulted Anya. After half a year of him being dead, with no physical evidence to prove what he did except a pregnancy that they can’t prove was forced upon her.
Curly is not enabling his friend, and trying to sweep the situation under the rug, he is literally constantly trying to deescalate the situation. Curly doesn’t act like he’s just trying to make the situation disappear. When Anya expresses that she’s uncomfortable, she doesn’t even say out right that she doesn’t want to do his evaluation. Yet Curly decides to volunteer despite not really having the experience, and it also not being in his job description. After Anya tells Jimmy she’s pregnant, and she’s scared for her life, Curly goes to try and talk to Jimmy. He tries to get Jimmy to calm down, and to think rationally, he tries to keep Jimmy from acting out. and then Jimmy goes and crashes the entire fucking ship into an asteroid. Even if they wanted to imprison him, there was nowhere to put him. The only places that had locks were the cockpit and medical. We saw what happened when he was in the cock pit alone, and the last place he needs to be is the one place that Anya can really call her own.
When Curly says he’ll talk to Jimmy, that’s not him belittling the situation. He needs to stay calm and reassure Anya that he’s trying to help her. If Curly was immediately like “I’m gonna go kick his ass” or if he insisted on some sort of retaliation against Jimmy, then that would just stress Anya out more. There is no way to keep eyes on Jimmy at all times, and if he faces any punishment over Anya then she knows he will find a way to punish her for it. Aside from the fact that, I think Curly may have done whatever she asked, especially with the way he emphasized he’d do “anything” to help her when she first tells him that she’s pregnant. He informs her that he truly cares about her, her wellbeing is his responsibility.
Anya also seems to be way too forgiving for her own good. Even when she thought Curly tried to kill all of them, all she had to say was that she couldn’t believe that a person’s worst moments make them a monster. If she was willing to forgive what she thought was attempted murder, I’m sure she came up with every excuse in the book for Jimmy. I’m not saying it’s right, I’m not saying she deserved it. She didn’t. What she went through was fucking awful and horrific. But it’s in her nature to forgive people, even when they really don’t fucking deserve it. We don’t even know if she knew she was assaulted the whole time, since there’s a good chance that Jimmy manipulated her into thinking she deserved it/wanted it. It may be possible that she thought she deserved it, and was too ashamed to speak about it openly for a while, with only the feelings of disgust and shame to accompany her.
Let’s also take into consideration that Anya was not the only person Jimmy was abusive to. We saw the way he talked to Curly, especially at the birthday celebration. Jimmy was an abusive dickhead to everyone. The last time Curly tried deescalating the situation before the crash, Jimmy immediately started taking the stuff Curly told him in confidence and using it against him, to make Curly just as miserable as he was. Jimmy turned his own suffering into shared suffering because then he could tell himself that he wasn’t just trying to get away from his own actions, he was trying to HELP his friend, who was also suffering.
My point is, I think too many people are not thinking deeply enough about Curly, as well as the context on the entire situation. They are putting blame on him when he is also a victim of Jimmy. It was literally just an overall shitty situation
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just pretend(?)
danielle marsh x fem!reader ; angst, fluff
synopsis: your coworker can’t seem to fall out of love with you so you convince your best friend to fake date you. sometimes the “fake” seems a little too real.
warnings: PINING!!! ; danielle is touchy and wonderful and reader is a mess ; kinda all over the place?? I'm also a bit iffy ab the pacing on this one ; bit of angst near the end ; alcohol ; anything else not mentioned ; not proofread… none of my fics are…
a/n: this is based off my life rn bc my friend and i r literally fake dating so my coworker can stop being in love w me and i just HAD to turn this into a fic like what (but most of this is exaggerated ofc esp the whole coworker thing I made her a little over the top on purpose for the plotLOL)
"absolutely not." hanni looks disgusted, almost appalled with that stupid expression on her face. “you’re crazy.”
"please, i'll pay you." you beg, clasping your hands together and giving her your best puppy eyes.
"you're going to scare the hoes away... no, no, and no.”
"what ‘hoes’ hanni? when is the last time you've talked to a girl." you groan and pinch the bridge of your nose.
she sticks her tongue out at you, then responds, “you wouldn’t know…”
“dumbass the only reason i’m begging is because women do want me. please, it’s not going to be serious or anything—“
“i don’t care, the answer is no. ask someone else!”
you’re currently perched on the edge of your best friend's bed, practically begging for help. you seem to have a knack for attracting the strangest types of people, and this time, it’s your coworker who’s got severe attachment issues and an unhealthy level of codependency. all you wanted was a paycheck and simplicity, but now you find yourself in a situation you never asked for.
your best friend groans again, “you and your flirting… it gets you into this shit time and time again and the way you act… you know what you’re doing.”
“what?”
“shut up, you act gay and you know people fall for that. i’m not gonna help you because you want to be an asshole, if you could just be normal for once—“
“fuck you.” you flop onto her bed, shutting your eyes and rubbing your face. “i’m just nice and it’s fun to flirt! it’s nothing. i flirt with my friends and you all the time, they’re fine with it.”
“that’s because they’re straight, y/n. gay people are very vulnerable – except me.”
“you would know.” you retort, earning a glare from hanni. “who the hell do i ask then?”
“haerin?”
“she wouldn’t.”
“yunjin?”
“we don’t match, plus, she dates around.”
“sakura?”
“edating someone right now, some girl in france?”
“the hell?”
“i know.” you sigh louder and hanni just looks at you with slight, playful disgust. “what do i do.” you flop your hands onto the mattress and stare up. “dude, she’s too obsessed, i’m flattered because i mean, maybe i’m attractive and whatnot but this is just–”
“--delusion at its peak.” hanni clicks her tongue, now smiling at you; an idea pops up in your best friend's big head. you turn to face her, raising a brow. “how about dani? she’s literally perfect.”
danielle marsh is perfect, that’s the problem.
she’s a biology major whose ipad pro notes are so neat and pleasing to the eye that they genuinely keep you awake at night – most of it being because you’re leeching off her, but they’re so neat it really has you thinking how she does it all.
to make things even more bewildering (and impressive), she’s one of two people you know – you’re unsure whether your cousin hyein counts, high school is nothing compared to what you endure – who manages to get at least eight hours of sleep daily. in contrast, everyone else in your circle, including yourself, is barely hanging on by a thread.
yet, danielle seems to have cracked the code. she even finds time to volunteer at the library where she works, making you wonder if she’s some sort of extraordinary being. her ability to balance everything so effortlessly leaves you in awe, often questioning if she’s even real considering how remarkable she is.
the worst part is that she’s your best friend, right after hanni, and the person you’ve been crushing on since your first semester of university.
it’s impossible not to have a crush on her—she’s gorgeous, sweet, and embodies everything you could ever want and more. she’s captivating, and every time you see her she flashes that stupid, adorable smile that makes your heart do a flip regardless of how many times you’ve convinced yourself that she’s unattainable and that there’s no way and that you don’t even like her and–
“i couldn’t.” you shut hanni down, quick. “she’s… you know.”
hanni furrows both brows, turning her head. “she’s what?”
“you know.” you make some strange gesture with your hands that only confuse hanni further.
“i don’t, just fake date her.”
“she wouldn’t agree.”
“sure she would, let me call her!”
you shoot up and look at hanni with an expression that screams ‘are you out of your mind?’ as she finds danielle’s contact on her phone.
before you can stop her, you hear a ringing sound and feel your body give up. hanni grins at you when danielle picks up five seconds later, both of you hearing a friendly, “hi!” as you back away from her.
“hey mo dani!” hanni greets, giving you a shit eating smirk. “miss l/n has a question for you.”
“she’s with you?” danielle’s voice is sweet like honey even from the phone. “hi!”
“hey!” you greet a little awkwardly, glaring at hanni.
“y/n was wondering if you could date her.”
eyes widening, you leap and grab the phone from hanni immediately, sputtering out jumbles of words nervously, “n-no! i mean, yeah… but not for real.”
“oh,” you hear danielle respond lowly from the end of the phone. “wait, i’m confused.”
hanni watches you close your eyes tightly, clearly flustered and thrown off by her little antics.
“y/n came over to ask me to date her, not actually, but just like, pretend.” hanni explains, “her coworker is still in love with her.”
“sarah?” you hear from the other end of the phone. “i thought you rejected her like, three months ago.”
“i did, but she’s still… ugh.” you flop onto the bed again and danielle hears hanni laughing in the background. “she’s still stuck on me i think, i don’t know, she’s been so…”
“if it’ll stop bothering you then i’ll help!”
“you will?” you respond, shocked. hanni mouths an i told you, then gets shoved.
“yeah! i don’t want my best friend being so bothered, it must make you uncomfy too, right? working with someone who likes you?”
you start to wonder if danielle would be uncomfortable in a similar situation, maybe in one where she’s friends with someone who likes her, but she’s unaware of that. you shake your head, clearing your mind and staying present.
“kind of, it’s just… extra stress.”
“okay, then let’s date!” she beams, you can picture her eyes scrunching and smile growing. you want to die (affectionate) just thinking of it. “this should be fun!”
“thanks for helping out dani, thanks so much. i’ll let you be, okay? gotta go um… run errands.”
“alright! just text me, bye, love you.” the call ends and you sigh again, feeling yourself sink deeper into hanni’s sheets.
hanni is very much your mortal enemy, she still doesn’t know why you’re so distraught because of danielle. whatever the reason may be, it makes her cackle next to you.
–
it’s nine in the morning, you didn’t have time to pregame the lecture on microbiology with at least three shots of espresso, and you’re yawning as you leave the room.
you hear your name being called out and turn to see no one other than the feeling of hot chocolate on a cold, snowy day turned into a person walking towards you – danielle.
“hey! hi.” she greets, smiling wide. her hair is clipped up and small strands of her hair stick out cutely. “hey baby.”
you almost choke. “what?”
“did you forget we’re dating now?”
“oh.” dating, but is it even that if it’s not real? “um, hey babe?” it comes out uncertain and danielle laughs.
“wow, you suck at this – it’s okay, we’ll work on it.” she giggles, then links her arms with you. “let’s go get coffee, i need it in my system right now. oh my god, it’s our first date!”
laughing to hopefully fade away all signs of being flustered to oblivion, you tighten your arm that’s locked with hers. “right, yeah.”
you’re going on a ‘date’ with the prettiest girl on campus, she’s paying for your iced americano with oat milk splashed into it, and she’s smiling at you like you’re laughter in the rain. this can’t be good for you, it can’t be — it’s not. you wonder whether this will be worth it in the end because your coworker doesn’t even know about any of it.
(yet.)
–
before your next shift with your delusional coworker, you and danielle have already conjured up a storyline and backstory for your whole arrangement.
you two conversed for an hour after walking towards the park near her apartment and sitting down next to each other on the swings like kids. danielle was giggling and you were smiling at how charming she looked. unfortunately, you found yourself falling even harder for her just from making up the whole fake story.
danielle suggested keeping it simple, but cute: you two met at the library she worked at, you found her cute and exchanged numbers, went on a few dates, and have been girlfriends for nearly two months.
“but i literally told sarah that i wasn’t looking for anything.” you explain, sighing as you kick the mulch on the ground. that’s what you had said, but what you meant was that you’ve been looking for danielle the whole time. “she won’t believe it.”
“well,” danielle gives you a cheeky look and giggles. “i managed to charm you in a way that pushed that whole idea aside. that’s not too unbelievable, right?” she winks at you and you feel your heart stop momentarily.
you scoff playfully and snicker, “oh shut up.”
“it’s part of the story! are you saying i have no charm…”
she has too much charm.
“dani, you’re such a dork.”
“a dork that caught your heart! i think this story is perfect.”
pushing aside the slight ache in your heart and the flush in your cheeks, the two of you formulate a first date story: you took her out bowling, where you lost terribly to her (danielle insisted this detail had to be included), and then you both had dessert together at your place.
it’s not a terrible story, not at all. even hanni would be impressed, but you’re not going to tell her because she’d tease you both relentlessly, and you’re not sure your heart could handle that.
–
danielle walks you into work holding your hand, your coworker, sarah, watches the whole thing.
a pretty girl (pretty is an understatement in your opinion) smiles at you while walking you in, she’s telling you about the little kids she read to the other day and you can’t help but marvel at the excitement coursing through her.
she drops you off near the register right before the small ‘employees only’ sign, then holds both of your hands and looks at you like you’re a flower that’s just bloomed beautifully.
she pauses, observing you closely, then smiles wider. “okay, i’ll get going sweetheart.” the pet name makes you swallow subtly. “have fun at work!”
she takes her hands away from yours, making your skin feel a little colder. “bye, see you.”
danielle glances at your coworker, who’s looking at her with something mixed with confusion, anger, and a hint of disgust. she then looks back at you – a better sight in her opinion – smiling and waving once more before walking away.
you stay there, frozen for a few seconds, before walking behind the counter and setting your bag down.
as you grab your apron, you catch sarah in your peripheral and turn to greet her. “oh, hey.”
“who was that?” she asks immediately. “what’s up with the ‘sweetheart?’”
you grin as while tightening the lace of your apron, then respond, “my girlfriend.” and it feels wonderful rolling off your tongue.
“what? i thought you didn’t want anything?”
“you still in love with me or something?”
she feels her throat dry as she looks at you pat down your apron. “w-what?” she stutters, shaking her head. “no, why would i be…” her tone isn’t convincing, and neither is she when she adds, “it’s just… what’s with the change of heart?”
“she’s really charming,” the thought of danielle begging you to mention that makes you blush. “i like her a lot.”
sarah fights back a frown, instead, her lips twitch into a forced smile as she walks past you to tend to a customer.
–
danielle picks you up from work just to tighten the knot, and sarah also witnesses all of it.
both you and your coworker get off at closing, and after locking the doors, you run into danielle.
she’s standing outside in a baby tee and jeans, a cap perched jauntily on her head. the moment she sees you, her face lights up into a pretty smile, and you instinctively return it. she rushes over, wrapping her arms around you in a warm hug. as she pulls back, she scans you with a playful yet affectionate gaze, her eyes lingering on you with a mixture of admiration and curiosity.
“sweetheart! i missed you.”
“i missed you too dani– baby…” you mutter the last part shyly, making danielle giggle. “you came? it’s late.”
“i wanted to pick you up, can your girlfriend not do that?”
it still sends a shiver down your spine – hearing danielle call you that. you rub the back of your neck and look away nervously, then respond, “of course not, i’m just surprised.”
sarah looks at the two of you, scoffing under her breath. danielle hears it, turning to look at her and grin, raising her brows along with it before meeting you again. she places a hand on your shoulder, then mumbles, “well, hanni called us over, i wanted to scoop you.”
“ohhh,” it makes sense now, she wouldn’t willingly pick you up just because of the whole ‘fake dating’ thing, there had to be a motive. “alright. i can drive? if you’d like, you know. you must be tired from work too.”
“aw, you’d do that?”
“i um,” you cough, avoiding her eyes again because she’s making you feel all flustered without doing much. “yeah, it’s nothing… baby…”
she grabs your hand, fingers intertwining before dragging you along to her small suv, then handing you her keys.
your coworker groans now that you two are further, narrowing her eyes at danielle when she turns back not so subtly to make sure sarah is looking. any normal person would back off, getting the hint that the person they want is unavailable, but sarah sees it as a challenge, somehow.
there’s nothing she can’t achieve when she puts her mind to it, that’s her mindset.
you’re oblivious to how insane she is, too clouded with how touchy and giggly danielle is after the whole interaction when teh two of you get in the car.
–
danielle sits besides you on hanni’s couch, leaning against you a bit. “yeah, she gave me a glare, it was kind of funny.”
“pftt– i guess it’s working then?” hanni asks, walking over to hand you two juice from her fridge. danielle takes it happily and it makes you smile a little.
“i hope so.” you sip on your peach juice. “but she’s like, clinically insane.”
“is she?” danielle questions, tilting her head as her hand finds its way to your bicep. you blush.
“dude, she was crazy.” hanni rubs her temple. “like, oh my god, she was going insane for a good while because y/n didn’t want her like that. i saw their messages and–”
“okay i’ll tell the story thank you.” you scoff. “she’s really competitive, and i guess new to romance? considering how she reacted i don’t know, she’s very…”
“sensitive?” danielle asks – you shake your head.
“i mean no, but kind of. she would get jealous over me really easily and was kind of codependent, like everything i do affects her or something. i’d just go on my day, but she’d always be so reliant on me and text me so often and i just… it’s so much.”
“ah, i see. how long has it been since you rejected her?”
“a few months. i thought she stopped liking me since it’s been so long, but lately there’s been tension and she’s looking at me how she used to…” hanni listens closely as she watches you rub your forehead, looking a little distraught. “i just, oh my god she has terrible attachment issues it’s concerning. the only thing i could think of was pretending to date someone.”
danielle nods in understanding.
“yeah, one time i went to see y/n at work and she looked so like… hostile. that’s not normal, we’re visibly friends.” hanni adds.
you know the exact afternoon that it happened, what hanni mentioned that is.
she had pulled up to drop something off, and you teasingly flirted with her, hugging her as thanks. afterward, you rang up one of her orders and played with her fingers, a little habit you had developed to annoy her. despite the evident look of disgust and annoyance on hanni’s face, your coworker—who allegedly liked you a bit too much—looked like hanni had just slapped you in the face or spat at you.
long story short, hanni glanced over to see the coworker glaring at her menacingly. in response, hanni poked at you once more before hurrying out with a latte in her hand, confused and slightly terrified.
“yeah she’s… got a bitch face.”
“it’s not normal to glare at people that simply interact with your coworker…” danielle mumbles. “i’m sorry to hear that.”
you wave your hand, giggling lightly. “it’s nothing, really. i mean, i just don’t want her to be so obsessed and stuck on me, i think us pretending to date should tame the fire.”
pretending.
the word makes both you and danielle tense up.
–
you clock in again, greeting sarah.
she smiles brightly at you, waving and you have to make a little gesture to remind her there’s a customer in line. sarah turns away bashfully, then takes the man’s order with a hint of attitude. you’re not very fond of that.
he orders an americano, so you immediately get to work, weighing out grinds of espresso, tamping it down, and pulling two shots. as you do so, sarah pulls up next to you and nudges your shoulder.
“hey,”
“hi.” you respond, not looking up from the cup in your hand. “did you need something?”
“that t-shirt looks good on you, have you been working out?”
you feel uneasy the moment she says it, swallowing a lump in your throat. you pour the two shots over the hot water and force a response, “thanks, and um, no.” before calling out the order.
sarah continues to watch you closely as you throw away the used espresso, then says, “your girlfriend didn’t drop you?”
“she’s working.”
“right. i’d find a way to drop off my girlfriend anytime that i could.”
“good for you?” you look her in the eye again, clenching your jaw.
“you don’t post her much on your socials either, are you guys really a thing?”
fuck.
you scoff, “what kind of question is that? of course… i just… don’t post much. we’re still kind of new to this.”
“right, she’s not even your lockscreen.”
“i’m going to grab some beans from the back,” you interrupt, redirecting the conversation away from the topic of your alleged girlfriend. sarah narrows her eyes at you as you turn away from her, stepping away and disappearing towards the storage area.
once you’re alone, you sigh and pinch the bridge of your nose, feeling the weight of the strange interrogation settle on you. there was an unmistakable hostility in sarah’s tone, a sharp edge that cut through the air. hanni’s right, she always is. the mere thought of enduring six more hours with sarah makes you want to crawl into a hole. her jealousy is palpable, and it eats away at you, gnawing at your nerves.
you pull out your phone and quickly dial danielle, pacing back and forth as you wait for her to pick up.
“hello?” she responds less than ten seconds later. “what’s up?”
“she’s catching on, kind of. i think she’s jealous.”
“sarah?”
“yes.” you groan, then lean your back against the wall. “i can’t work like this.”
“i’ll come over? do you need me to?”
“no, but can we meet after? i think we need to be more public, if that’s okay.”
you hear her confusion through the phone. “what? public?”
“like, soft launch or something. i just need to make it obvious that i’m quote on quote dating someone – you. and we need a lockscreen together.”
a giggle is heard on the other end of the line, “oh wow.” danielle mumbles teasingly, “this is pretty serious.”
“i hope i die.”
“aw, don’t say that babe. just come over to the library after, okay? good luck on your shift! i have to clock in soon too.”
“can we meet at my place?”
“anything is fine, that’s alright.”
“i literally owe you my first born, dani.”
“it’s nothing, this is quite entertaining.” she says, and you smile with the phone at your ear. “call me later, okay? send me updates.”
“right, yeah.” you almost whisper, “thank you.”
“it’s nothing, sweetheart.” her laugh is infused into the sentence, making your chest burn.
–
“this is so dumb.”
you are so dumb. this isn’t helping your case.
hanni and minji are fighting back laughter while you try to naturally rest your hand on danielles knuckles. you’re stiff and it looks anything but natural.
the angle you take the picture at makes it look awkward, and the picture’s quality sucks too.
“just relax.” danielle says, then holds your hand instead. “here, let me take the picture.”
you’re trying to keep your cool while minji and hanni watch and danielle, the prettiest girl you know, holds your hand and scoots closer to you in order to ‘soft launch’ your fraud of a relationship. her hand is nice in yours, her skin is soft, and she’s so close you can smell the vanilla fragrance she uses.
danielle snaps a quick picture, then the rest of the bunch – including you – scoot over to look at the picture.
“well would you look at that! it’s perfect.” danielle beams, grinning at her work. “post that one.”
“holy shit.” minji says in awe. “no yeah, you could fool me with that.”
“anyone could fool you, dumbass.” you snicker, looking up at her and smirking.
“i hate you.”
“oh, i guess you don’t want free food from my work…?”
minji groans, making you laugh.
danielle’s hand is still in yours, you don’t fully register it until you realize you need both hands to post a picture on your instagram story. she seems a bit disappointed when you let go, though you barely notice – and even if you did, you might just chalk it up to your imagination.
it's fun, no doubt about it. yet, you can’t help but wonder what it would be like to take pictures of you and danielle that aren’t staged or orchestrated. you long for authenticity, capturing moments that are mundane and candid.
the thought lingers in your mind the whole time, even as you pose with your back to the camera, pretending to cook alongside danielle. it's all set up and artificial, every movement planned out, yet danielle starts giggling and leaning into you – a spontaneous gesture not part of your last-minute brainstorming.
her laughter is genuine, her touch warm, and it makes you wonder if maybe, just maybe, not everything is as fake as it seems.
–
you wake up from your nap and groan as your ringtone renders you awake. blindly, you slap your hand in every direction on the bed until you feel it under your other pillow. someone’s calling you, that’s all you can make out since there’s a red and green circle.
tiredly, you mumble, “hello?”
“hi! are you busy?” it’s danielle’s voice responding, shaking you awake.
“oh, um, no.” you say as you sit up slowly, rubbing your eyes and running a hand through your hair. “are you okay? did something happen?”
“i’m fine! i was just wondering if you were free. you sound tired, were you sleeping?”
“i just took a power nap that’s all. what was it that you need?”
“oh, sorry to wake you.”
“it’s fine, seriously.”
“well,” she starts, “i was just wondering if you wanted to go out together?”
“oh, me?”
you hear her giggle through the phone and smile softly. “i mean, i am calling y/n, aren’t i?”
“yeah, you are.”
“and i’m asking you, my girlfriend, to hangout. it’s like a date!”
“we’re not actually dating danielle, you don’t have to pretend when we’re calling and alone.” you say quietly, pursing your lips.
it’s not that you hate it, danielle being all lovely and playing the role of your girlfriend too well. the thing is, it feels like you’re getting led on, and the way she is just gives you false hope to something real.
danielle feels a little ache in her heart when you respond like that, but she pushes it away for the time being.
“i don’t mind it, it’s fun!” she beams. “anyway, there’s free ice cream downtown for couples, do you want to grab some?”
“is there? yeah, i’m down. do you want to take the metro?”
“that’s perfect, there’s probably so much traffic.”
“alright, i can scoop you and take us to the station in fifteen minutes, okay?”
“perfect.” she closes the conversation, and the call ends.
you flop down on the bed again, just for a moment. your eyes are fixated on the ceiling above as you breathe in, thinking about everything.
you and danielle aren’t dating, not for real. it’s just a show, a sham. she simply wants to hang out for free ice cream, nothing more. you know this. you set yourself up for this whole fake dating thing—well, kind of, considering hanni was the culprit behind this whole arrangement.
it’s already been over a month, and danielle doesn’t seem fazed in the slightest, treating the whole thing as no big deal. you must be insane; you can’t keep doing this knowing your feelings are growing and she most definitely doesn’t feel anything real. it’s just to benefit you, and she’s a great friend who’s willing to help you out. yet, each time you pretend, it gets harder to separate your act from reality.
despite the turmoil, you’re up and finding a change of clothes in order to make danielle happy. because even if she’s not your girlfriend, she’s your friend and you love her regardless.
(sometimes the love you have claws you from the inside.)
–
danielle clings to your arm the whole way down to the city. sometimes she clings a little tighter than usual, then goes silent, and it makes you breathe deeply.
it takes a few wrong turns and teasing to get to the icecream place, there’s already a long line with actual couples. you feel out of place in a way; there’s partners holding the other by the waist from behind, setting their heads on top of the others. a few are just holding hands or lingering close and you can just sense all the love and adoration in the air.
you swallow shallowly, tensing your jaw because danielle is close to you, but not because you two are something more than friends.
“wow, so many lovebirds.” she says in awe, gazing around.
“uh huh.” you feel her hand slide down your forearm, then her fingers intertwine with yours as she looks up at you. “hm?”
“to seal the deal.” she shrugs, smiling. “plus, your hands are big… and warm.”
“you have small hands.”
“perfect fit for yours.” she giggles playfully, making you do the same. “what flavors did you want? it’s two scoops for free.”
“you can pick both, i don’t mind.”
“what? c’mon, you should pick one.”
“no, you wanted ice cream. i’m just here to make you happy.” you admit, tightening your grip on her hand.
she starts to respond, but stops for a few seconds. you watch her look away bashfully, staring at the ground and grinning to herself. she shakes her head, then says, “you’re so lovely…”
“pfttt, i just want you to be happy, seriously.”
“you know,” she begins, looking at you again. “whoever manages to become your girlfriend would be real lucky.”
“oh.” your lips twitch into less of a smile and you pause for a moment. “maybe.”
“this fake dating thing is making me realize that you’re such girlfriend material.”
a small laugh stifles the tension and awkwardness in you, “thanks? you are too.”
“am i?”
“yeah.” you stare into her eyes, shes everything you could wish for in a person. “very.”
before danielle can respond, the line moves, and it’s time for the two of you to decide on two flavors. it takes a while to do so, with you declining the offer to chime in and pick a flavor you want, danielle was the one to invite you out anyway. but she looks at you with puppy eyes, pouts, then puts a hand on the side of your bicep and it makes you cave in.
the final choices are salted caramel and coffee.
danielle holds the cup in one hand, drags you away from the area littered with lovey dovey couples – some being too lovey, considering they can’t seem to get away from each other – and leads you blindly towards a small alley in a neighborhood until a bench comes into view. she pulls you towards it eagerly, making you laugh until you’re both sitting next to each other.
you frown a little as you look at the ice cream in the cup. “some of it is melted.”
“not all of it!” danielle beams, then scroops a spoonful of the coffee side – the flavor you ended up choosing. “you have the first taste.” she says, bringing it closer to your mouth.
“wait, you should have it.”
“too late,” she starts to move it in a circular motion, saying, “ahhh~” as she does so.
you scoff, then lean forward and all of it is in your mouth in one bite. danielle watches your eyes light up.
“it’s good.” you mutter, then grab the other spoon to scoop the other flavor. you mirror what danielle did before, making her laugh just as much. “open wiiiiide~”
“ahhh~”
you snicker before moving the spoon into her mouth, she closes it and smiles immediately, melting in place despite the ice cream being pretty cold.
the street lights make her look precious, highlighting the satisfaction on her face because of some simple ice cream she’d gotten for free. you want to see her this happy everyday and as much as you can.
a small hint of ice cream is on the corner of her lips, it urges you to bring your hand over and wipe it off with your thumb. danielle stops savoring the dessert, instead, focusing on you.
“sorry, there was… yeah.”
“mhm.” danielle says, staring at your lips. “it’s really good.”
“i can tell.” you turn away, feeling flustered when she looks at you like that. “let me try your flavor.”
the two of you continue to eat ice cream together, subconsciously scooting closer and closer as you share it. danielle’s head ends up on your shoulder when the cup is empty in your hand, silent in her place.
you don’t budge, mainly because she seems comfortable and you don’t mind ruining your posture a bit if it’s for her. she sighs contentedly, moving her hand over to hold yours in the midst of the moment, slotting together effortlessly. she doesn’t say anything, but you feel her lean into you a little more.
“you okay?”
“just happy.”
“ah,” you rub your thumb against her skin. “that’s good.”
“being with you makes me really happy.”
“being with you makes me happier.” you say softly, staring at your hands aligned seamlessly. “do you want to stay here for a bit longer?”
“please.”
“it’s getting late.”
“i know, just a bit longer.” danielle says.
just a bit longer. if only the whole arrangement could last forever, if only you two could be this close and warm for lightyears.
minutes pass, and neither of you move, lost in the comforting silence. the only shift comes when you turn your head to press a gentle kiss into her hair. danielle feels perfectly in place, her heart fluttering at the tender gesture. a soft smile spreads across her face, a silent acknowledgment of the moment's sweetness.
–
the night prior had to be a dream, it was too perfect. it was the realest you’ve felt with danielle, the closest to something romantic. it was even enough to consider that she felt the same, and you’d love to revel in that possibility, but you have to restock the beans and cups quickly before tending to the drinks.
there’s only thirty more minutes until your shift ends, it feels like eternity.
sarah catches you smiling to yourself throughout the shift, biting the inside of her lip. she’s filled with all too much: anger, jealously, dissapointment, and really just everything that makes her uneasy.
she still can’t believe it, you had gone on a whole tangent telling her you couldn’t be in a relationship and now you’re being a complete loser in front of her. she hates it, she wants it to be her that makes you smile randomly throughout the day.
what pisses her off more, and truly makes her lose all hope, is when you go from looking tired and drained to bubbly and smiley as soon as a familiar figure starts walking toward the counter.
she watches you check the time on the register, your smile widening because you can clock out and be with danielle, who’s waiting just across the counter. the change in your demeanor is undeniable, and it stings sarah to see the joy that danielle effortlessly brings out in you.
you walk over to danielle, reaching for her hand. “hey.”
“hi.” the way danielle says it makes your chest warm and sarah nearly gags in return.
what makes sarah's shoulders sink, her heart drop, and her frown deepen is when danielle suddenly kisses your cheek.
the shock is evident on your face as you stand frozen, your hand instinctively moving to hover over the spot where danielle's lips had just been. the tenderness of the moment is overwhelming, and sarah can't help but feel a profound sense of loss. the realization that your heart belongs entirely to danielle crushes any lingering hopes she had, leaving her to face the painful truth.
“w-what was that for?” you look over and make eye contact with sarah, who’s grimacing. “there’s um, you know… bystanders.”
“i missed you, so much. i couldn’t stop thinking about you.” danielle says simply, not bothering that sarah is the only one who’s witnessing this, and from a few feet away too. “do you want to get dinner?”
“it’s three in the afternoon silly.”
“well, anything is fine. we should study before we eat! i heard the module mr. lee assigned us was really helpful for…”
the rest of what danielle says doesn’t register in your coworker’s mind. she studies you closely, her frown deepening with each passing second. it’s painfully clear to her now—you’re genuinely in love with danielle, and there's nothing she can do to change that. the way you look at danielle, like a child seeing a rainbow for the first time, leaves no room for doubt.
it dawns on her that giving up is the only option, and she feels a pang of resignation settling in her chest.
–
nearly three months have passed and both of you have still been ‘pretending.’
neither of you acknowledge that it’s fake, not during the weekly dates, study sessions, and late night walks or movie nights that end up in the two of you falling asleep together. danielle doesn’t think twice when kissing your cheek here and there, even your knuckles when she thinks you’re asleep.
you figure that maybe it’s okay to kiss her cheek too sometimes because she’s her lips turn each time. and when you pick her up for weekly dates, she happily jumps into the passengers seat of your car as if it weren’t just a mutual agreement. sarah has already given up, considering she seems defeated, and you wonder if you should too.
you can’t tell if it’s just how danielle is, which eats you inside. everything feels all too real, and your feelings only grow more unbearable.
–
you shouldn’t have let jimin drag you out to minjeong’s party. she’s already left the moment you stepped into the house, she’s probably gotten a hold of a drink already.
jimin had noticed how deeply stressed you've been lately. your responses were slower, your shoulders seemed permanently slumped, and the stress was practically etched into your face. being one of your closest friends, jimin decided that it was time for a change. she was determined to get you out and help you relax, knowing how crucial it was for your well-being (and social life, to be completely real).
walking around, you scan the crowd for a familiar face. unfortunately, the only people you recognize are sunghoon and jake, who have a history of hitting on you despite your clear disinterest. they still haven't grasped that you're a lesbian. you quickly decide to steer clear of them.
the only reason you’re here is because you’ve been throwing yourself into your studies, staying late at the gym, and doing too much to avoid danielle – or even the thought of her.
(which is unfortunately impossible since every little thing reminds you of her.
the flowers on the counter at your work remind you of her smile, the couch in your apartment is where you two have spent hours together, and really, you’re hopeless.)
you find jimin outside on the porch with her other friends that you’ve only talked to once or twice. they’re all talking about something, clearly tipsy, and you’re walking over to linger near your friend.
“y/n! oh my gosh girl, where have you been? come here, have a drink!” jimin grabs your arm, pulling you in and hugging you like she hasn’t seen you in forever. “here, take a shot.”
she hands you a shot of what you assume is some cheap vodka, you didn’t even have time to pregame for this. you’re not against drinking, not at all, if anything you’re all for it. there’s videos of you in groupchats shotgunning beer and finishing with barely any reaction – but tonight, you don’t know if you’re in the mood for it.
one won’t hurt, maybe it’ll erase danielle from your mind for a moment.
“fine.” you grab the small glass, then bring it to your lips and cock your head back, eyes pinching for a brief moment as you swallow. “shit,” you mumble, “give me another.”
you don’t know what has taken over, because you’re downing two more without hesitation. jimin laughs and smiles proudly at you.
for a brief moment, everything feels fine. the music blasting from inside the house, a mix of charli xcx and the chatter of your friends mocking one of your professors and jake, makes you laugh out loud. amidst the chaos, you find a beer in your hand, and somehow, you manage to tolerate the taste. wonyoung appears too, and hands you another after you quickly finish the first. you accept it, even though you're already starting to feel a bit fuzzy.
jimin looks at minjeong with a sparkle in her eyes, and you subtly push her a little closer until their shoulders touch. they exchange smiles, and you watch, feeling proud of your matchmaking.
your heart sinks as it suddenly reminds you all too much of danielle. the fondness and spark between jimin and minjeong make you frown, your grip on the beer tightening as the bittersweet memories flood back.
“fuck,” you practically whisper. “i need to, i’m going to get more um, drinks.”
“hm? okay.” jimin says quickly, then turns back to the girl she’s linking arms with.
your head pounds, so you gulp down the can of beer in your hand, then crumple it and toss it toward a trash bin in your line of sight.
as you make your way to the kitchen, you spot a bottle of vodka and pour yourself a shot into a plastic cup you found. the liquid burns your throat, intensifying the ache in your head. despite this, you pour another shot, perhaps a bit too generously, hoping to numb the growing pain and the emotions clawing at your heart.
the room feels like it’s spinning, you’re walking down some hall and blinking and blinking until you reach a bathroom. thankfully, no one is making out in it, but you check the shower for safety measures.
you’re finally alone, groaning as you fall against the wall of the bathroom and slide down until you’re sitting on the bathroom floor.
clumsily, you grab your phone from your back pocket. the screen lights up to a picture of you and danielle, cheeks squished together and smiling.
you stare at it for too long, your breath hitching and your vision blurring as the ache in your head intensifies. the happy memory contrasts sharply with the heaviness you feel now, making it all the more difficult to look away. she just looks so cute in it.
you tap your screen again, and another picture of her appears. it’s a picture of her asleep in the passengers seat, head tilted uncomfortably and lips parted slightly. you had set up your lock screen to cycle through images of danielle, initially to fool sarah, but also because seeing danielle’s face as soon as you pick up your phone makes you feel at ease. each photo captures her different expressions—laughing, pouting, lost in thought—and they all make you grin.
the happiness you feel is bittersweet, knowing it’s all part of an arrangement that feels increasingly real to you.
your vision is a little unclear, but somehow it sharpens just so you can see her perfectly.
“fuck,” you gasp out, unlocking your phone and trying to navigate to your recent calls. you had called hanni earlier and she had just been lounging at her place. you figure that she’d be able to take you away from here.
you squint, pressing on the contact that has a and n, assuming it’s hanni, then wait as the phone rings.
“hello?”
“hanni, i’m… can you pick me up?”
“y/n?” her voice is muffled when it reaches your ears, “are you okay? what happened, where are you?”
“jimin… dragged me out. i drank… soooo much.”
“y/n, oh my gosh.”
“hanni, stay on the line, please.”
“i’m not–” the voice cuts off, you drop your phone on the carpet. “hello?”
“you have my location… right.” you slur, head leaning against the wall even more. “hanni i can’t do it anymore.”
“y/n, i’m on my way. are you alright?”
“hanni, i can’t.” you groan, staring up into space. “i don’t want to fake date danielle anymore. it feels too real, i hate it.”
silence follows before you hear the voice on the other end of the phone.
“you can’t? why, why didn’t you tell her?”
“she seems happy, and… we just, don’t acknowledge that it’s not real.”
“y/n…”
danielle sits in her car, heart sinking.
you dialed her on accident, and it doesn't seem like you know it’s her.
“please come. please.”
danielle gulps, feeling tears forming in her eyes.
–
danielle scavenges through the house your location on her phone has brought you to, looking around for you helplessly.
she makes her way to the porch and spots jimin, who’s hands are on minjeongs neck as she holds her in place. danielle walks over, not wanting to disturb the intimacy, but you’re her biggest priority, so she’s willing to do so.
“jimin,”
she turns around, looking at danielle confusingly. “oh, when did you get here?”
“where’s y/n?”
“hmmm… she went to get drinks a while ago, she hasn’t come back yet. try the kitchen?”
“okay, thank you.” danielle says hurriedly, then rushes back inside.
she checks the kitchen, only to see jake and sunghoon with beers in their hands as they cackle loudly. you’re nowhere in sight, making her bite her lip in frustration.
danielle goes through every room on the first floor until she reaches a bathroom. she pushes the door open, and it suddenly stops, hitting someone. a groan escapes from behind the door.
"i'm so sorry!" danielle rushes out, peeking around the door to see who she’s just collided with. "y/n?" she gasps, eyes widening in recognition and concern.
you’re sitting against the wall, hair tousled and cheeks red. there’s a white tank top hugging you, the thin straps of it loose against your skin from your posture.
“hanni?” you look up, squinting. “i wanna go home.”
you see the figure move closer to you and close the door, then she squats down and you realize it’s not hanni. danielle comes into view, her eyebrows creased with concern. your cheeks flush even harder, and your lips part.
she puts a hand on your forehead, then cups her cheeks with both. “are you okay?”
“you’re not… hanni.”
danielle’s shoulders fall down a bit. “hanni um,” danielle hates lying, but she’s doing it now to save you from spiraling. “she sent me over.”
“oh.” the response from you cracks her heart slightly. “okay.”
"let's go," she says firmly, helping you up. despite being taller and more muscular than her, you lean on her for support. danielle manages to steady you with surprising ease, guiding you out of the bathroom and through the house, her grip strong and unwavering.
–
you collapse onto danielle’s couch and groan, your body is limp against the cushions.
a few moments later, she comes back with a cup of water, placing it on the coffee table before she sits you up. she tilts your chin up and you look at her with wonder as she grabs the cup and holds it to your lips, “drink.”
“mhm.” you mumble, sipping slowly and swallowing.
your vision clears slightly, though it might just be danielle who’s grounding you. her concerned eyes meet yours, and while guilt tugs at you, you're also captivated by her beauty in this moment. you're drunk and out of your mind, thoughts muddled and unfocused.
“pretty.” you sigh dreamily.
“y/n,” her voice is laced with uneasiness. “drink more water.”
“okay.”
“and stay the night, okay? you um, left…” she swallows hard, fighting back a frown. “you left your clothes here, i’ll go grab them.”
“can you stay with me though? will you? i really… just… i want you here.”
danielle bites the inside of her lip, her eyes wide with confusion. just moments ago, you had admitted that you wanted to stop the whole ‘relationship’—that it had become too intense, too overwhelming. and now, you’re asking her to stay? her mind spins with the jarring shift in emotions.
you lean in, clinging onto her. danielle feels the warmth of your breath and the softness of your nose brushing against her neck. the touch sends a shiver through her, and she swallows hard, struggling to steady her breathing. as you pull back, your faces are mere inches apart. you lock eyes with her, your gaze heavy with so much.
there’s a lump in her throat. “okay.”
–
danielle wakes up with you on top of her and your head in the crook of her neck. she hears you breathing softly and subconsciously, her hand slides into your hair.
why are you so confusing? danielle wonders, twirling your hair with her pointer finger. is this what you really want?
you’re incredibly considerate, a trait that’s always shone brightly. the way you go out of your way for her—planning dates, cherishing every moment together, simply because it makes her happy—fills her with a bittersweet feeling. she adores these shared moments, savoring the illusion of authenticity. but now that it’s clear that all of it strains you, it weighs heavily on her heart.
you stir awake, your breath warm and rhythmic against danielle's skin. as you hum softly, her cheeks flush a delicate pink. she feels the gentle pressure of your arms tightening around her, pulling her closer. you shift, nestling deeper into her, finding a more comfortable position. each movement sends a shiver through danielle, leaving her heart fluttering like crazy at eight in the morning.
she doesn’t know what to do.
–
danielle doesn’t ask you out or come over the whole week, excusing herself by saying she’s busy or caught up with things. of course, you don’t comment on it – she’s not really your girlfriend, you shouldn’t expect her time and affection.
but then another week passes by and you don’t get any texts back, sometimes she even leaves you on delivered for hours. that’s not like her at all.
you catch her in class and she’s still the same danielle you know – bubbly, pretty, and sweet – but that’s really the only time you see her these days.
it’s confusing, all too confusing, so you barge into hanni’s apartment on a thursday evening because she’s the only one you can rant to about this.
“you didn’t even text me–”
“oh my god i think danielle fucking hates me.”
hanni lets you storm in, walking towards her room and flop onto her own bed. you look devasted, especially when you rub your face in your hands and groan loudly.
“okay, first of all: why the hell would she? second of all: yeah, why… why would she…?”
“she’s been avoiding me and i have no fucking clue why.”
“dude what.”
you recount the entire story to hanni, animatedly illustrating every detail with exaggerated hand gestures. “so, jimin practically dragged me out to unwind, and i ended up drunk out of my mind!” you say. your hands wave dramatically, punctuating the story as you describe stumbling around, the room spinning, and how the whole ordeal felt like a whirlwind.
hanni watches, her amusement growing as you explain the night’s events. “jesus.”
“yeah, and then danielle came and picked me up.”
“she did?”
“yeah… you called her over… didn’t you?”
“dude, what are you talking about.”
you pause, looking at her with confusion evident all over your face. then grab your phone, heart feeling strained when you see danielle posing with a stuffed animal that one time – out of many – you two went to the mall together. you click on the phone app, looking at your recent calls and scrolling down to roughly two weeks ago.
you see hanni’s contact name, and then danielles after.
“hanni, did i… did i call you that night? two weeks ago, the friday night i went out.”
“dude you only called me that morning or something, you left something here.”
“oh my fucking god.” you gasp, putting a hand over your mouth. “oh my god.”
“y/n what.”
“i drunk dialed dani and i thought it was you. she told me you sent her to grab me…”
“what did you say to her?” hanni asks, looking at you with slight worry.
you groan, rubbing your face again. “i… i said i didn’t want to fake date her anymore.”
“oh, well that’s not too bad.”
“no, i remember it somehow. i said i hated it.”
your best friend looks at you, confused again. “you do?”
“yeah, but like, no?” you groan once more and fall onto the bed again. “hanni, i’ve… i’ve liked danielle since first semester.”
“oh.”
“yeah, oh.”
“you’ve been fake dating and simultaneously in love with her?”
you sigh. “yes.”
“holy shit.”
“yeah. i think she took it the wrong way, maybe she thinks i hate her?”
“you need to talk to her.”
“she doesn’t want to see me.”
“no, she’s so fond of you. i honestly think she likes you back.”
“okay it’s not the time for that–”
“shut the hell up bro.” hanni pinches your cheek and you slap her hand away. she begins again, “dude, she rambles about you and shit. there were times i actually thought you guys were really dating.”
“i wish.”
“then make it come true!” hanni groans. she pulls you up, then puts both hands on your shoulder. “you need to go talk to her, stop being a pussy.”
“it’s not that–”
your phone vibrates in your hand, snapping you out of your animated retelling. instinctively, you glance down and see a notification from danielle. hanni notices the shift in your expression, quirking an eyebrow as you stare at the screen, looking visibly distressed. she leans closer, peeking at the notification.
as your face unlocks the phone, the text is revealed: "can you come over? we should talk." your mouth drops open slightly in shock, and hanni mirrors your expression. the room suddenly feels heavy.
“dude.” hanni points at the screen – the obvious. “she–”
“fuck me.” you mutter, “fuck me.”
“dumbass,” hanni says, pushing you off her bed. you curse and look at her with “what the fuck?” written all over your face. hanni stands up and continues to push you out her room, saying, “go see your ‘girlfriend,’ even if it’s not real you better go talk to mo dani.”
you sigh, pushing her off you and grabbing your things before you walk towards hanni’s apartment door. you stare at the handle, then the text, and linger for a moment. hanni puts a hand on your shoulder and you look at her.
“i’m fucking terrified.”
“well you’ll feel even worse if you don’t go, so go.” hanni urges, opening the door and nudging you out.
–
the air is cold, it’s really just cold outside and it makes you shiver more than you already are just from the thought of the interaction.
you’re outside danielle’s work, sitting on the steps because you can’t bring yourself to go in and approach her directly. maybe it makes you a coward, but you’ve always been nervous about seeing her willingly and making the first move. the minutes stretch on, each one making you more anxious, but you can't help it. the thought of facing her, of initiating that crucial conversation, ties your stomach in knots. she called you out here anyway.
wind hits your cheeks and you bite your lip, walking around in your place in an attempt to warm up. then, you catch someone in the corner of your eye, so you turn around and meet danielle.
a loose sweater drapes over her frame, and wide-fit linen pants hide the shape of her legs. the wind tousles her hair just as it does yours, but she looks effortlessly angelic, stopping your heart for a moment. her hair, caught in the breeze, frames her face in a way that makes her seem almost ethereal, temporarily making you forget your worries.
then she’s walking toward you, and you remember why you’re here.
you swallow hard, body tensing.
“thank’s for coming, i’m sorry i haven’t been.. um, able to spend time with you.” she looks nervous, her eyes avoiding yours and hands fiddling with each other. she stares at your necklace instead as she continues, “i’ve just… i wanted to talk to you about what we have.”
“right, i wanted to talk to you about it too.”
“oh,” danielle says quietly. “i’m sorry, i didn’t want to be a burden. you called me instead of hanni the night you got drunk and i know how you feel about fake dating. i’m sorry that you had to do it with me and it caused you so much stress i just–”
your heart aches as you listen to her ramble, guilt evident in her voice for something that’s not her fault. you can't bear to hear her blame herself. your brows furrow with pity as you gently cut her off, “danielle, no, let me–”
“stop, i want to make myself clear. i want to explain a lot of things to you, you’re so lovely and sweet and you don’t deserve to be so stressed. it’s just, okay, wait.”
she pauses, breathing in, and looking at you with tears lining her eyes. your breath shakes looking at her like that, you can’t breathe or speak in the moment.
danielle purses her lips before continuing, “okay, when hanni first said you wanted to date me, i got so excited because well, i always thought you were cute.” she turns her head to the side and bites her lip before looking back at you. “and then you said it wasn’t an actual date, you wanted it to be fake. i don’t know i just, i felt really sad when it happened but at the same time the thought of fake dating you didn’t seem too bad because i’m selfish and i mean, i liked you a little and i thought i could just fake it and revel in the artificial aspect until i got over it but i ended up falling for you so much and i’m sorry. i don’t want you to think im anything like sarah–”
“danielle, stop.”
“no, y/n i just want to explain myself–”
“danielle, shut up, oh my god.” you gasp, looking at her in disbelief. “you, are you fucking with me?”
she looks at you, still feeling guilty. when she blinks, two tears fall down her cheeks and she inhales sharply as she conceals a sob. she turns away, then murmurs, “no, i’m so sorry.”
“n-no, no. dani, danielle.” you almost breathe it out, then bring both hands to hold her face. your hands cup her cheeks making her face you. “please stop crying, i’m sorry, baby, i’m sorry.”
“b-baby?” she says, confusing taking over her features. you had gotten so used to calling her endearing pet names that it slipped out so suddenly in the heat of the moment.
the lights outside shine just enough for you to see her clearly. her eyes are watery, tears staining her cheeks, and you use your thumb to gently wipe them away. her nose is a little pink, and so are her cheeks. of course, she’s a pretty crier too, but you look at her with guilt, shaking your head as you continue to stroke her cheeks with your thumb. the sight of her like this breaks your heart even more.
“i only said i hated it because it was all too real, but not in a bad way. not at all.”
“really?” she says between sniffles. “w-what do you mean?”
“i’m saying that,” you use your thumb to rub a tear threatening to fall from the corner of her eye. “i hated it because i couldn’t take the fact that it wasn’t real. i wanted it to be real. danielle, i’ve wanted to be yours since you first gave me the notes from the first lecture we had together.”
“what?”
“danielle,” you almost whisper, then kiss her forehead. “i like you so much. i don’t hate you, or this – i hate that it’s not real.”
her mouth opens in shock as she looks at you, sniffling. you anxiously wait for a response, hoping she'll say something, but she doesn’t. instead, she hugs you, wrapping her arms around you tightly. you return the embrace, holding her just as tight. the world around you fades away, leaving only the two of you in the nerveracking moment.
“i like you too – a lot. i was so scared when you said you hated it, i thought i was making you uncomfortable and gosh i just felt so bad and–”
you rub her back with your hand and cut her off, “i was anything but uncomfortable, i felt like i was living in a fantasy.”
“thank god.” danielle sighs in relief.
you pull away, looking at her again and wiping remnants of tears with your thumb again. “i’m sorry for making you cry.”
if you could go back and punch yourself for being stupid — you’d do it in a heartbeat. a dumb slip up and miscommunication from your lips is the reason danielle’s nose is still tinted pink from crying, you feel guilty as ever.
in your hands, it feels like you hold the world. she shakes her head in your hold, then smiles from relief.
“it’s okay.”
“are you busy after this?”
danielle giggles, shaking her head again. “if you’re asking me out on a date – a real one – then absolutely not.”
“dinner? it’s on me for being stupid that night, and this whole time.”
“perfect.”
you smile sweetly at her, your gaze lingering on her lips. before you know it, you lean in and boldly peck her right then and there. she gasps when you pull away, looking at you with widened eyes as you back off. but then, she reels you in again, leaning closer and kissing you once more. the kiss is soft and warm, filled with all the unspoken words and emotions that have built up between you. you feel her smile against your lips, and everything else fades away.
when you part again, you look at her fondly and ask, “wait, this is real, right? like, we’re…”
danielle laughs, hastily pecking you once more and lingering close.
“i don’t think it’s the alcohol that made you so dense and stupid.”
#kpop x reader#danielle marsh x reader#danielle x reader#danielle marsh#newjeans x reader#new jeans x reader#mo jihye#mo jihye x reader#newjeans fluff#newjeans danielle#newjeans imagines
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𝐎𝐤𝐚𝐲 𝐛𝐫𝐨, 𝐬𝐡𝐮𝐭 𝐮𝐩.
𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: On your trip to get familiar with the area, Ethan decides to be annoying and you show him his place.
𝐂𝐰: Jealous Ethan tries to get the two of you caught mid act.
To everyone’s surprise Ethan behaved rather well for the rest of the ride and upon making it to the campsite it was as if nothing had happened just a few hours ago. Walking out the bus that had you all crammed together in a, to you, comically small seat had you letting out a sigh and stretch of relief. Trying to get all the kinks out of your body before familiarising yourself with the place.
With the fresh air hitting your nose, came a sense of freedom. You and all your classmates would be enjoying the quietness and adventures this forest holds. While some people were busy rushing to stand by the bus, taking the various bags and suitcases from the luggage compartment, you decided to look around the area. Until most people had got their stuff, that is.
Taking note of the wooden buildings- a larger community house in the middle, a teacher’s and guide’s cabin and a bit further out the smaller cabins that were to fit this class. From the small talk you overheard from the teachers when on the way here, each cabin holds around 4 people total. So you’d likely spend the room with Ethan and 2 others. Hopefully people you actually knew better than as a ‘classmate’.
Taking your eyes off the buildings for a moment and putting your attention on the scenery instead. Tall and dark trees all around you create a calm and protected feeling in your chest. Small and rugged rocky trails going through the forest, leading to all sorts of mysteries- a lake and a sauna right by it, a nice fire pit for midnight talks and last but not least the activities you all would be kept busy with. In all honesty it sounded and looked more like a summer camp than a school trip but who were you to judge this event that had been the talk of the town or well.. class.
A blow of warm air to the back of your neck made you turn around only to be met with a grinning Ethan. He chucked your bag into your hands to which you thanked him quietly. Raising an eyebrow upon seeing his suitcase. “What’s all that for? You make it seem like you’re moving somewhere.”
Ethan followed your pointing finger and gave a nonchalant shrug. “Have to be prepared for everything. Wouldn’t you say so?”
With a snort and a simple roll of your eyes you turned around to look at the cabins once more, trying to look for one that seemed good to stay in. “Yeah right. As if we’re in an apocalypse.” The faux offended gasp made you tilt your head back to Ethan, only to see him frowning at you.
“When you have a zombie after you, I’m not gonna help you. You’ve lost that privilege, just so you know.” Of course Ethan would play right into the banter. It’s almost heartwarming to see how well he knows you and your remarks. He seems happy about it too, given the cheeky grin now on his face.
Fighting back an actually genuine smile at your thoughts you forced out a sarcastic laugh. “Consider my boots quaking.” Ain't no way you'll let him see just how much you actually valued him as a friend.
–--
Fighting back a twitch of your eye, you stood in the middle of your cabin. ‘I thought the number seven meant luck not misfortune.’ Mentally groaning as you were forced to share a cabin with Ethan alongside Jana and her friend. Of course it would be the two other people who fit perfectly in the classmate category instead of friend. Not exactly what you had hoped for.
Now, what had you irritated in the first place? A very questionable situation you found yourself in. Jana and Ethan were proper bickering on each side of you, trying to convince each other why you should share their bunk bed with them. Ethan to your left, saying that you should share his bunk bed because the two of you were close friends and Jana to your right counter arguing that you needed a change and the best way was to share her bunk bed.
Leaning your head back with a groan you muttered out a simple ‘Stop arguing for the love of-” You really couldn’t handle the two whining any longer.
“Jana, let the guy go. You already know him and Ethan are like two peas in a pod.” Thank fuck for Jana’s friend interfering this banter and dragging Jana off you. Otherwise it would have gone on forever, you feared. Though when Jana was pulled off you, Ethan didn’t let go as expected. Instead he hugged your hands tightly close to you, practically trying to prove that ‘you were his’.
“Oi. Let go.” Ethan looked at you and smiled, dragging you to the bunk bed so you could unpack your things.
“You owe me now, just saved you from a zombie.” You couldn’t help but chuckle at Ethan’s joke, having to hide your laugh into your hand. It wasn’t exactly proper to laugh at your friend's whispered insult when the person was in the room, now was it?
“Thought you were supposed to leave me to fend for myself?” A snarky question earned a nudge to your side followed by a small ‘Changed my mind.’ from Ethan.
You could already feel how fun this whole event was going to be despite the situation a few seconds ago, it wasn’t even the evening and you felt like you had lived through 2 weeks of this campy life. Better unpack your bag and make this cabin feel like home as quickly as possible so you could go and explore the place.
---
Yeahh…not ever did you think that your curiosity to look round the place was a popular thought, so much so that it would bring together an ‘exploring group’. Not that little either, most people decided to tag along, not to mention the teacher deciding to come too. Taking off along one of the roads into the trail that was supposed to make a circle around the area. Get used to the place, you know?
You and Ethan seemed to be the two leaders of the group for now, starting the stroll while chatting about random things. Then some more people joined the conversation and then more…and more, until it seemed like you were the one tagging along.
It’s not that you hated the other, gods no, your extroverted part just died off midway so now you opted for listening to the others. Ethan, however, didn’t seem to catch the hint and kept trying to get you more into the conversation. Which only annoyed you given the remarks he was making.
Walking a bit slower as you took your time to admire the scenery to save your mind, practically zoning out on the sight of the lake below you. This hill with some benches was a prime spot to hang out, noting the place into that good memory of yours.
“Come on bro, wouldn’t want you to get lost now..” Ethan’s hand was hanging off your shoulder as he practically pressed his cheek against yours.
Not bothering to fight back you let the guy try to drag you back to the others who had made it a fair bit ahead already. “You’re awfully quiet. What’s got your panties in a twist?”
You could already hear the awful grin on Ethan’s face, so out of habit you gave him a look. “Didn’t expect so many people to tag along. Little tired is all.” A hum escaped Ethan. A perfect sign he was plotting something and his next words confirmed it.
“Want me to take care of them? I’m good at combat!” Apparently Ethan was really going all in on the apocalypse roleplay for some reason and you couldn’t help but feel your face contort into a confused expression.
“You and combat? Those two do not go well together. You know that.” The offended sigh that you heard next to you stopped abruptly and then Ethan grabbed your cheeks, making you face him.
“Oor.. you want me to take care of you instead?” A simple twitch of your eye made him back off with a casual laugh. Almost made him feel the need to surrender to save himself of your wrath. It was either your mind was in the gutter or he was purposefully being suggestive.
“I mean it though,” Ethan said after a moment of silence, turning to glance at you again, “I can help you get your spark back. Have some fun between the two of us, you know the good old primal style-”
Seems he had chosen some bad words to describe his ideas because before Ethan could go on, he was very quickly pulled off the trail, pushed against the nearest tree. Your hand over his mouth to properly shut him and his stupid ideas up. There was no need to get so riled up by some ‘jokes’ your best friend made but they did have an effect. More than you’d like to admit.
Feeling him smile against your hand made you lean closer to Ethan’s face, whispering into his ear, “You better shut the fuck up right now before I make you.” And by the way his smile grew underneath your hand, it told you everything you needed to know.
“Turn around.” A simple command that Ethan eagerly followed, looking over his shoulder as he moved your hand from over his mouth to be wrapped around his lower stomach. Trying so damn hard to get you all riled up. To make you lose yourself. To finally give him your attention. Only you and him. Alone.
The perfect arch in his back as he tried to press himself against you did not go unnoticed at all. Using your free hand to trail it down his back to rest on his hip to suddenly pull your own hips flush against his ass. “You want this don’t you? Being annoying on purpose to get what you crave?” Leaning close to whisper against his neck. Giving Ethan a taste of his own medicine. “Tell me why I should be nice, hmm?”
Ethan pressed his eyes shut for a moment, letting out a breath of air. You could notice how he tightened his hands against the bark of the tree he was leaning on. “ Wanna be good for you..”
How sweet. So eager to make you feel good. Even if it was a blatant lie, Ethan was a perv and you could see it clearly now. This was no kind gesture on his part, he just wanted you. Needed you. Disguising it as ‘wanting to make you feel nice’. So naughty you are Ethan.
“You expect me to believe that after that stunt you pulled in the bus?” Smirking evilly against Ethan’s neck as you kept him neatly pressed against your groin while the hand that was previously wrapped around him, moved to touch his skin. Sliding up his shirt to leave teasing touches on his warm skin. So sensitive just from this? Oh.. poor guy and his shallow breaths.
Nodding desperately and pressing his forehead against the tree, “Yeah...please? I’ll behave.” Ethan’s little breaths and begging made you hum against his neck. Leaning back a bit to really take in how eager he was. Already the perfect putty for you to play with. “Where’d all your attitude go? Lost it in your throat, did you?” He could handle a little more teasing, couldn’t he? Well, he better handle it.
Pressing your chest against his back as both of your hands made it under his shirt, keeping him stuck against you. Sliding your hands up his stomach as you smirked at his surprised noises. Leaning your head to the side to glance at his reddening face. With a resolved whisper and a meaningful sharper press against him you teased, “You better have a condom with you, otherwise I’m leaving you here.” Ethan shuddered against you and slowly dug into his front pocket, pulling out a condom. An amused hum escaped you. Had he really been preparing this whole thing? So needy, especially the hopeful look he gave you. Looking innocently in your direction, waiting for you. So obviously you took the condom and held it between your teeth. Hands are busy creatures.
A quick look around confirmed that you two were indeed alone. The group had continued walking along the trail. ‘This can’t be any more perfect.’
Finally you got to work, moving your hands to remove Ethan from his pants. As soon as the zipper was opened you pushed his pants down to his ankles. Enjoying how Ethan shivered and kept an anticipation filled gaze on every small action on your part. Keeping one hand on his surprisingly already hard dick, palming him through his boxers with slow movements, while the other was presented before him. He looked at your fingers for a moment before opening his mouth for you.
A swift push and you could hear him slightly gag on your fingers. Lewdly sucking at them as if they were a meal to devour. Slurps and whines left his lips that were neatly around your fingers, keeping them wet as he looked at you with a proud look. Trying to milk any sort of praises from you by sliding his tongue all over your fingers to show how good he was. Only for you.
With a breathy whine from Ethan you withdrew your hand, pushing his boxers out the way, the slick and wet fingers toying with him before slowly pressing a finger into him. Savouring the gentle gasp it earned from Ethan. You had never seen him this way and honestly. You kinda liked it.
The teasing and slow moves your fingers did in order to prep the guy earned a whiny sigh from Ethan, “Can you just do it already..I can’t wait..” Halting your hand for a moment, giving him a scare of leaving completely before harshly shoving two digits into him. ‘That should shut him up,’ A sharp breath in did exactly that, leaving Ethan wordless.
Soon enough Ethan was rocking back on three of your fingers, hands balled into fists against the tree as he desperately tried to find some sort of satisfaction. Something deeper. The heavy huffs and puffs by him helped quite a bit by making you more willing to be in him already. The sounds were sweet and addicting. You really couldn’t wait anymore.
Pulling your hand away made Ethan turn his head in your direction, not that he could see much from over his shoulder anyways, which left a pout on his needy and red face. Though the sound of your zipper opening peaked his interest. Pushing your pants and boxers out the way, quickly ripping the condom open and rolling it onto your dick.
Lining it up with his needy hole left you little to no time to think before Ethan himself pressed himself back against you. Forcing you to enter him, his back arched immediately and a pleased mewl left him. “Oh… so someone’s this needy?” The chuckle didn’t even make it to Ethan’s ears, he was too busy getting himself used to you.
To help him along you pressed yourself against his back, pulling him a bit up so instead of his head resting against the tree it was his chest that touched nature. Hands holding onto his overly warm skin, massaging it with gentle touches.
“Move.” Aand there was the signal you needed to hear. The first pull back, leaving only your tip buried into Ethan along the need-filled buck, completely sheathing yourself into the warm and gushy walls earned a low groan from the both of you. Ethan felt so damn good around you, it felt as though he knew exactly what to do and when. Perfectly keeping you snug inside him.
Leaning your forehead onto his shoulder you began bucking yourself in and out of him at a decent pace, not enough to be considered ‘teasing’ but not fast enough to properly stimulate the whiny Ethan beneath you. This was supposed to be a bit of a punishment to Ethan for being annoying after all.
Never did you think that Ethan would be vocal…well this vocal. It almost felt like he was living through this ten times in one go. From fear of people hearing you took a hold of his head, pressing your palm over his mouth. Gently pulling his head back a bit as his body rocked along with every thrust you did. Feeling how the warm air from his nostrils bushed your knuckles while he tried to keep sounds to a minimum. Spoiler: it wasn't really working.
Ethan seemed to grow more and more needy as time went on and his moans and mewls only increased your inner need to fuck him completely dumb right here and right now. So as any guy would, you picked up your pace.
Each nasty slap of your pelvis meeting his ass earned a breath from you and a pleased yet muffled moan from Ethan. Feeling how sensitive he was, all because of you, made you proud. You didn’t even know why. Ethan was your best friend for fuck sake….this was no activity between friends. You knew that but didn’t acknowledge it.
Suddenly Ethan shuddered in your grasp, tightening around you. Even from underneath your hand he managed to whine out ‘Keep going- that…fuck..’ Ah so you found his prostate. A smirk made its way to your face. A new purpose made itself visible. With unfaltering thrusts you drove yourself into himself in just the right angle to brush against his prostate. Toying with his sensitivity to see him crumble and wither in pleasure.
The filthy slaps of skin to skin contact came to an abrupt stop. Making Ethan grumble and look over to the side to give you a glare. Seeing the focused look on you made him follow your line of sight. ‘Oh.’ Someone was there. From the faint sounds that grew louder you could figure out who it was. Jana.
She was calling out for someone…wait you? Why the hell was she looking for you? Didn’t the rest of the people keep going? So why was she walking back after you? Unbeknownst to you Ethan squinted his eyes in displeasure. Not only because Jana had stopped you from moving but because she was getting on Ethan’s nerves. How did she not get that you were his? He decided to prove it to her once and for all.
With sly actions he began moving against you to keep the momentum going. Who cares if someone is walking past, right? Ethan just needed to keep his lips shut. With a shocked look you put both of your hands on his hips, trying to keep Ethan still, to which he just looked at you and whispered, “I’ll keep quiet…’s need to feel you..”
With a silent sigh you gave in and let Ethan move against you, though you kept your attention on making sure the coast would be clear. ‘Omfg Jana walk faster.’ Mentally cursing at the snail speed Jana seemed to be using to pass by. Ethan, who noticed your focused manner, smirked at the information and picked up his pace, perfect for catching you off guard. Really bucking himself back to feel you.
With a sick idea, he opened his mouth to let out probably the most lewd moan ever. Loud too. Just when Jana was done passing by yet not completely out of the picture. Ethan was purposefully whining and moaning your name to make Jana jealous. So this was a jealousy thing between Ethan and Jana, huh? In Ethan’s mind this whole scene confirmed you were properly his and if Jana knew better she’d back off.
With a quick and harsh manner your hand was over Ethan’s mouth again. “The fuck are you doing!? Shut up Ethan.” He just pressed himself against you and mumbled ‘She’s gone..’ against your hand to urge you to fuck him again. He was correct that Jana was gone now and the others would make it to the cabins from the other side. Oh...Ethan was so going to get it, now that it was certain no interruptions would happen.
Freeing Ethan’s mouth, instead gripping his hips to drill yourself into him. You were pissed at his jealous stunt but with his moans hitting your ears you couldn’t stay mad at him for long. Surprisingly enough his sensitivity hadn’t gone down at all given he let out every sound imaginable when he felt you target his prostate. Feeling him twitch and shudder, how he tightened around you, how his legs threatened to give out because you just felt sooo good in him. So perfect.
With a whiny mewl Ethan let his head fall forward against the tree feeling how his body rocked along with your harsh thrusts. Eyes pressed shut as shaky breaths left his parted lips. He came. And hard. The sticky substance painting the tree, dripping down in small droplets. Hmmm, at least it's some nutrients for the tree? No clue.
The tight squeeze of his ass only heightened your own need to find your relief. Hands gripping Ethan’s hips to the point of leaving bruises as you pushed yourself as deep as possible. Breaths heavy and rugged. ‘So close.. So damn close.’ Only a bit more, Ethan could handle it, yeah?
That warm knot in you tightened even more and with a low groan you sheathed your dick into him as hard as you could in your hazed state that was looking for the tipping point. Pulling Ethan tight against you as you came. Just keeping him close as you came down from your high, warm breaths against his neck.
Ethan could feel how warm his insides were, though he didn’t show his disappointment of not properly being able to feel it. Lifting his hand up to hold your head, messing with your hair as you were nuzzled into his neck. “Feel better now?” Oh for fucks sake..of course he was going to be unserious and continue his previous banter.
��Yeah. Refreshed and dealt with.” He shivered a bit from the chuckle, and reference to the earlier conversation, against his neck. Smiling to himself as he felt you lean back and slowly pull out of him. Slowly making sure he was mentally good enough to go back to the cabins. Wouldn’t want to miss this too much. To not miss your dick too much. Yeah, a hard task for Ethan.
While you were busy with tying up the condom, Ethan slowly turned around to lean his back against the tree. His tired and satisfied eyes looking at you, admiring you with every inch of your being. It was clear that he was head over heels in love with you, yet you seemed to be so oblivious. Calling him a friend psshh as if. You couldn’t ignore him and his feelings now, right?
“What do I do with this?” Chucking the used rubber on the ground for a moment, just long enough to get yourself clothed up again. Ethan followed suit and picked the briefly discarded item up.
“I’ll throw it away, don’t worry.” He ensured and hid it in his hand for the time being, until a trash bin was visible. A small hum came as a reply for Ethan.
Taking the course back to the cabins. You two would probably need to walk slow for Ethan’s sake but also so the flushed and messed up appearances would fade. The smell of sex was most likely still around you two but at least you wouldn’t look like dogs in heat.
A quick glance to your right and Ethan’s proud smile was on full display. “Someone seems content.”
Ethan shrugged and clicked his tongue, “Very much so. 0-2.” You gave him a simple nudge to his side and gave a playful roll of your eyes.
“Help me think of an excuse why we were gone instead of keeping score. I doubt ‘I got lost with my friend’ is viable here. We look fucked.” Oh… Seems you still don’t see him as a partner, just means Ethan needs to try a little harder and he is known to be stubborn. He won’t give up until he gets what he wants, isn’t that right?
At least he can fondly look back on being fucked by the beautiful scenery of a lake behind you. Don’t get hard again Ethan.
#Stateac's works.#Ethan is a jealous bastard#It looks cute on him though#Maybe I should make you get him jealous on purpose#male reader#dom male reader#top male reader#masc reader
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[just a dumb little thing i wanted to write about Cas's bad moods being positively affected by dean's touch]
--
Dean scrubs a hand down his face and resists a loud sigh. Coffee. He needs coffee. Driving for eighteen hours straight isn’t good for anyone, but especially not for someone with a grumpy, newly ex-angel sitting shotgun.
Cas, tucked in the crowded line by Dean’s side, is oscillating between his typical feelings of disgruntled and fascinated by his surroundings. Just by the look on his face, Dean knows what he wants to complain about: the stuffy, small cafe is too hot, the people are talking too loud, and the barista at the counter is more focused on chatting with her customers than actually ordering their food, and Dean, why do humans insist on small talk if they’ll never see each other again? Most of these people are traveling and are transient, what is the point of commenting on the weather if—
“Would you stop!” Dean snaps. Several heads turn toward them. Ducking his head, Dean mutters a curse. He’s been listening to Cas’s bitching on the road trip for so long that it’s starting to knock around his head.
Cas frowns. “What’s wrong, Dean?”
“Nothing.” He pushes his shoulder into Cas’s. “Line’s movin’.”
He’s exhausted. Which makes him feel all sorts of guilty, because whatever exhaustion he feels, Cas must feel it tenfold. Cas’s grace fully depleted only a few weeks ago and the transition has been… less than pleasant for all involved. For Cas, it means feeling human like he never has before. He described the sensations—touch, smell, emotion, temperature, you name it—like a thousand itches that he can’t quite scratch. It makes him a grumpier bastard than usual.
Sam, as patient as he tried to be in the beginning, recently started losing his cool. Eileen had completely given up on the situation and wisely fucked off a few days into the whole process. When Claire called about the vamp nest she found in Nebraska, Dean couldn’t get in the car fast enough.
Cas insisted on coming. Sam insisted on staying. And, well—that was that.
Dean snags a glance at Cas next to him in the line. He’s squinting at the menu above the cashier. They found out he was near-sighted when he went full human, but he refuses to wear the prescription glasses Dean got him.
“Want me to read it to you?” Dean asks.
“No,” Cas snaps.
Grinding his back teeth, Dean huffs out a sigh. Which, of course, Cas hears. His frown deepens into a glare.
Dean’s gonna hear about it later in the car. Something along the lines of I’m so sorry my weaknesses are an inconvenience to you, Dean. Would you be more lenient with me if I was still an angel and could fight your battles for you? And no I won’t wear the glasses because I’m a big angry baby in a trenchcoat that doesn’t have any fucking clue how to manage his own emotions and—
“What can I get you?” the barista asks sunnily.
Dean slams his credit card on the counter. “Got any liquor?”
The barista’s smile goes a little crooked. “It’s eight in the morning.”
“Just—a coffee. Big one,” Dean adds as she keys it into the computer. He turns to Cas. “What do you want?”
Cas doesn’t answer; he’s looking off to the right, a frown on his face. But not his usual pissed-off frown. A curious one.
Dean elbows him. “Dude.”
Cas blinks, coming back to Earth, turning to the expectant barista. “Tea. Matcha, if you have it.”
Dean regrets letting Sam introduce him to that one. Taking his credit card back from the barista, their bill paid, he and Cas step off to the side. Dean finally glances at whatever the hell was so interesting to capture Cas’s attention.
Two women sit at a table, their eaten food just wrappers and crumby plates in front of them. Their hands are linked on the tabletop. Dean bristles; is Cas going to ask him why two women are holding hands? He can’t be that out of touch with humanity. But no; it’s something else. One woman is smiling, the other isn’t. Is that what caught Cas’s attention?
Dean sighs through his nose, shaking his head at himself. Trying to figure out what’s going on in Cas’s head lately is like trying to solve a Rubik's cube.
He feels a little tug at his jacket pocket. Dean paws Cas’s hand out of the way. “The hell are you doing?”
“I need your phone,” Cas says.
“What for?”
“I want to see how much longer until our destination.”
“You could just ask,” Dean shoots back.
Cas frowns. He goes for Dean’s pocket again.
“Jesus, fine,” Dean mutters, pulling the phone out of his pocket and unlocking it. He shoves it into Cas’s hands. (Cas had a phone, but he left it at a gas station a few hundred miles back. Dean’s not sure if he can fully blame Cas’s inattention to detail on being a human.)
Dean folds his arms over his chest and looks at the women again. They’ve stood up from the table, and the more upset-looking of the two has leaned against the other, who has her arms around her.
Cas is looking up at the women again, the Google maps app open on the screen forgotten.
“Large dark roast and matcha latte!” someone calls from the counter.
Dean turns away from the women and Cas, scooping up their drinks. “Wanna drink ‘em in the car or here?” he asks. He hopes that Cas will choose the latter, because the thought of hurtling down the highway in an enclosed space again is making Dean’s stomach turn.
Cas’s blue eyes turn to Dean. “Can we drink them outside?”
There’s a small bench next to the entrance door. They park themselves there and sip at their drinks as people filter in and out of the door. The two women come out a few minutes later and go into a blue Prius a few spots away from the Impala.
“Somethin’ suspicious about them?” Dean asks. When Cas gives him a curious look, Dean juts his chin toward the women. “You’re lookin’ at ‘em a lot.”
Cas shakes his head. “Nothing suspicious. Just… curiosity.”
Dean clears his throat. Nods. “Well, Cas, in our society there occasionally comes a time where people feel romantic feelings toward each other, and they decide to express that through—”
“Not that,” Cas snaps. He rolls his eyes at Dean’s cheeky grin. “I’m trying to understand human behavior more. Since I’m… unfortunately part of your species, now.”
“All right, Jane Goodall, so what’d you observe?”
Cas takes a sip of his grassy drink. “The blonde woman was upset. The brunette woman comforted her through touch. And it seemed to work.”
“Okay,” Dean says slowly, “and why is that weird?”
Cas turns his gaze to Dean. “You’re not comforted through touch. In fact, it makes you angrier.”
Dean snorts, shifting uncomfortably. “I mean. It’s not like I just want people—touchin’ me all the time.��
“Especially not when you’re upset,” Cas adds.
“Well, yeah. That’s a pretty common thing.”
Cas shakes his head. “Not necessarily. When Sam is upset, Eileen hugs him. And that’s received well.”
“Yeah, ‘cause they’re dating.”
“So touch is only welcomed when one is upset when they’re romantically involved?”
“Well.” Dean frowns at the steam rising from his coffee. “I mean, not always. Friends hug each other when one of them’s upset.”
Cas cants his head to one side. “So the two women could have been friends?”
“I’m betting not,” Dean snorts. “Friends don’t really hold hands. Not all the time.”
“But sometimes?”
“Sure. Sometimes.”
Cas nods, seeming to consider this. Dean takes a sip of coffee; then nearly spits it out again when a hand gently falls on top of his. He snatches his hand back and gapes at Cas’s innocent gaze. “What the hell, dude?”
“You said that friends sometimes hold hands.”
“I mean—you don’t just—” Dean huffs out a frustrated sigh. “Hugging is more in the friendship zone.”
A line appears between Cas’s eyebrows. “We only hug when one of us is about to die.”
And—Jesus. Okay. Dean has to blink hard a few times to find his center again from that one. “Um, yeah, I guess we do.”
“So if hugging is reserved only for mortal danger,” Cas continues, “and holding hands is too romantic—what else is there?”
Dean’s jaw works as he tries to figure out what to say. “I—you just—” He throws up a hand. “I don’t know, Cas! A pat on the shoulder? A friendly high five?”
Cas’s expression drops a bit. He frowns down at his tea, crestfallen.
Dean scrubs a hand down his face. Shit. The only thing worse than a grumpy ex-angel is a sad one.
He glances around them. No one’s paying attention. The bench is by the door, but people are too focused on getting inside to eat, or making a beeline to their cars. Besides, he’s sitting so close to Cas on the bench, it won’t even be noticeable.
Dean sighs. He holds out his hand, palm up. When Cas just stares at it, Dean moves it closer with a frustrated noise. That seems to make Cas get the picture; with a small smile, he takes Dean’s hand. He even laces their fingers together, which does not make Dean shiver and feel like his nerves are on fire.
“Only for a minute,” Dean says gruffly.
Cas nods. “Okay.”
And they sit there, hands linked between them on the bench, as they finish their drinks.
--
[And no, dear reader, it does not last a minute. In fact, it becomes Dean's new superpower—hugging, holding, or letting Cas glomp onto him whenever Cas is even in a remotely bad mood. Sam and Eileen take notice, but don't comment, because Cas is finally a relaxed and happy human.]
#destiel#destiel fic#was going to make this longer but dean and cas had other ideas lol#here's... a silly thing?
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Ayayui date♡
// I'm not sure why, but I suddenly got a burst of creativity. There's no special occasion for this post; it was really just an excuse to edit Yui in my favorite Princess Collection outfit. I like how the merch line was released right on Ayato’s birthday, so I really wanted to see an Ayayui date in those outfits! 😌💕
I was in the mood to write a special scenario again. You just have to click on ‘Keep reading’ to find it. This one is set after the LE events, particularly after the After Story, so I hope you enjoy it! ( ˶ˆ꒳ˆ˵ )
Ayato: Haa… finally!
After all this time, I’ve managed to sort out every single problem in the Demon World.
Geez, I’m gladly taking a break!
( Ever since I became king, I’ve been buried in an endless pile of documents—so many that I’ve grown sick just being in that place. Things seem to be getting better in the Demon World, though I’d lie to say it’s perfectly stable. )
( Well, whatever. I shouldn’t bother too much about that… for now. )
( Right now, all I can think about is her. Ugh, these stupid king duties have kept us apart for way too long. I’m sure she must’ve felt really lonely, huh…? )
( Damn it! That was never my intention, but I know it must be boring as hell to be stuck in the castle all day by yourself. )
( That’s why, I’m definitely going to make it up to her today and take her somewhere nice~! )
Place: Their room
Ayato: Chi-chi-na-shi, guess who’s ba—
( Hah!? She’s not here? )
Oi, Yui!
( She’s still not answering? )
Yui, where are yo—
???: Ayato-kun..!
— hugs his back —
Ayato: What the—!
Yui: Fufu, sorry for taking you off guard. I was just thrilled to see Ayato-kun again!
Ayato: Geez, next time I call you, answer me, understood? You’re still in the Demon World, anything could happen when no one’s around, y’know?
Yui: Ah… I’m sorry for being careless. I hope I didn’t make you worry…
Ayato: No need to sulk now. What matters the most is that you’re alright.
Now… about the thing you’re wearing. Where the heck did you even get it from? It’s the first time I’ve seen you in it.
Yui: Oh, actually I bought it last time we went shopping together. You see… I didn’t show it to you back then because I wanted it to be a surprise, but uuh… does it not suit me?
Ayato: Haa… normally, when a woman wants to surprise her man, she wears lingerie or something sexy, but I’ll forgive you this time. Why? Because you look hella cute in that, can’t deny.
— Yui blushes —
Yui: Ayato-kun… thank you! I’m really happy…!
Ayato: ( Is she seriously almost on the verge of tears for that? )
C-C’mon, don’t get all emotional over every little thing. The date hasn’t even started yet! You really want people to see you with red eyes and puffy cheeks outside?
— Yui shakes head —
Ayato: Good, now let’s go!
— He takes her hand —
Place: Kaminashi City
Ayato: Can’t believe I’m gonna say this but I somehow missed this place.
Yui: Is that so? I thought Ayato-kun didn’t like the Human World.
Ayato: I don’t mind either of them, but right now I’m sick of the Demon World. If I see one more document, I will end up throwing up on the spot.
Yui: Ayato-kun…
( That’s right, he’s been working a lot ever since he became king. I’m sure it must truly be tiring spending days in front of all those documents. )
I’m glad you put a lot of effort in your role, but take it easy, okay? I can’t do much in this situation, yet… If you ever need help, I want to be there to support you!
Ayato: Hmm… anyway. I’m not here to talk about work again. I just want us to enjoy some time together for once.
Yui: ( Ayato-kun really sounds exhausted… He’s matured so much these past few months, which isn’t bad, but I just wish he could relax a little. )
Then, let’s make the best of this day!
— tugs onto his arm and starts walking —
*Timeskip*
Yui: Haa… it’s way better outside.
( Ayato-kun is still waiting to pay for our things, but it was way too hot in that store, so he told me to get some fresh air. )
( Now that I think about it, vampires are always cold, so I doubt the heat bothers him as much as it does me, right? Even so, seeing him care about my comfort makes me really happy. )
— warm breeze hits —
Yui: Mm… so ni—
— something suddenly hits her —
Yui: Kyah! What on earth was that!?
Eh? That’s—
Familiar: Greetings. Pardon my interruption, but could it be that you are Komori Yui-sama?
Yui: ( ‘Sama’? Uuh… I feel like that’s an exaggeration. )
Yes, I am. Did anything happen…?
Familiar: Rest assured, there is no need for alarm. My purpose here is simply to entrust this to your care. Unable to find Ayato-sama, I must rely on you to deliver him this letter.
— Yui takes it —
Yui: But, what’s this letter about?
If it’s possible to tell, of course.
Familiar: In essence, a new set of documents has been prepared for Ayato-sama. Please inform him at your earliest convenience, as his return is eagerly anticipated.
Yui: Wait! Does it mean that he really has to return now—!
( Oh no! The familiar is already gone! )
( To think that Ayato-kun was finally starting to relax again… )
( All this letter will do is ruin his day, that’s for sure. )
( But at the same time, not showing it to him… that would undoubtedly get him in troubles. )
( Uuh… This situation is so complicated. What should I do…? )
Ayato: Chichinashi!!!
Yui: ….!
— suddenly hides the letter —
A-Ah, Ayato-kun, you’re back!
Ayato: Duh, and I kept calling your name but it seems you only answer to Chi-chi-na-shi~.
— He starts pinching her cheeks —
Yui: Whey dwont, staphh!
Ayato: Hehe, that’s what you get for spacing out and ignoring me.
Anyway, you weren’t approached by any creeps, were you?
Yui: N-No, not at all!
Ayato: Hmm… that doesn’t sound too honest. Are you lying?
Yui: No way! I… I’m just hungry and my stomach won’t stop growling, which is really embarrassing…
Ayato: Haa… you never change. Always getting embarrassed over everything, but no worries, I didn’t hear anything. Though, if you’re really that hungry, I guess we could get something to eat.
Yui: Y-Yeah, that sounds great!
* Timeskip *
Yui: ( After the restaurant, we went to the mall, then back to the center. Ayato-kun… we walked a lot today, but instead of getting tired, he just got more and more energetic. )
( I suppose he was really in need of this break, so maybe hiding that letter wasn’t entirely bad, no…? Still, I’ll have to give it to him today, otherwise I’ll surely put him at risk… )
Ayato: Oi Yui, look!
Yui: W-Woah! I’ve never seen such big Takoyaki before!
Ayato: Heh, right? It’s even bigger than the ones from the Demon World!
Also, Ore-sama got you this, so I better see you eat it all.
Yui: Eh-? This is such a big donut! T-There’s no way I could eat all of it!
Ayato: So you’re refusing my donut? You’re way too ungrateful for a Chichinashi. Well, in that case, I guess you don’t need it any—
Yui: No, no, the donut is good!
— starts eating it —
Come to think of it, today you’ve spoiled me quite a lot, Ayato-kun.
Ayato: And why would that be bad? I thought women liked that.
Yui: It’s not bad, but I really didn’t do anything special. You’re the one who’s been working all day and night, for this reason I believe you deserve this treatment more.
Ayato: Haa… getting all self-conscious, just like always.
Look, you know I’m not good at sentimental shit, but after everything we’ve been through, your presence is special enough for me.
I guess I just want to cherish you, that’s all.
Yui: Ayato-kun… I feel the——
A-Ah, oh no!
( The chocolate… it melted on my hand! )
I-I’m sorry, I’ll be right back!
— tries to stand up —
Ayato: Nah, nah. C’mere.
— grabs her and sits her on his lap —
Yui: Wait, don’t!
— he starts licking her hand —
Yui: A-Ayato-kun, stop it! We’re in public…!
Ayato: Mnn… Mm…
— slowly bites —
Yui: Uuh…
( At this rate, people will definitely start watching!)
— starts moving —
Ayato: Tch, you’re making this way too hard for both! Just stay still and stop acting like I’m about to kill you!
Yui: ( I know his intentions aren’t bad, but this is getting too embarrassing…! )
( I’m sorry, Ayato-kun! )
— tries to push him away but falls down —
Yui: Oww…
Ayato: ( Geez, what a klutz. )
Haa… are you hurt?
— grabs her arm and picks her up —
Yui: Ah, I’m alright, no worries.
Ayato: Oi.
What’s that?
— picks something up —
Yui: ….!
Ayato: Is that… a letter for me?
— starts reading it —
You… you had it all this time with you and didn’t say a word?!
Yui: I… I can explain!
You see, I thought—
Ayato: Shut up!
Do you even have the slightest clue about what you just did!? I seriously doubt you understand how important king duties are, do you?
Hah, of course, you don’t! Why would you?
You sit around doing absolutely nothing all day while I’m working my ass off to make sure you and everyone else can live comfortably!
I’m out here putting in the effort, grinding to create a decent life, not just for you, but for everyone, even if I didn’t ask for this shit. And you do this to me!?
I thought you matured too, but at the end of the day, you’re nothing but a selfish bitch!
Yui: Wait! Ayato-ku—
Ayato: Don’t touch me!
Yui: …!
Please, listen to me!
— grabs his clothes —
Ayato: Quiet! I’m not risking to go through that again only because of someone like you. Get lost!
— pushes her away and leaves —
Yui: …!
No… No… this can’t be the end…
How… How could I be this stupid…? Hhn… Ngh…
Kuh… Ayato-kun.. Nhn…
Place: Avenue
Ayato: (Fuck! I can’t return to the Demon World right now. )
( On top of that, why the hell am I the one feeling guilty now!? )
( She… Yes, she deserved that treatment. That’s what she gets for sticking her nose where it doesn’t belong. Besides, what she did could lead to something dangerous. )
( It’s not the first time she pulls such shit on me anyway, but… )
( Why can’t I stay mad at her no matter what she does to me…? )
Tch, such bullsh— Hah?
Guy 1: Aww, she’s playing hard to get~!
Guy 2: Aren’t you a bit too feisty for a crybaby?
???: S-Stop it! Leave me alone!
Ayato: …!
( That voice… Yui! )
Place: Alley
Yui: I-I told you to stop!
Guy 1: Just come with us, it’ll be fun~.
Yui: No, I don’t want to!
Guy 2: She keeps struggling, isn’t she cu——
— gets punched —
Guy 1: What the—
Guy 2: Such strength!
Yui: Eh?
Ayato: Get out of my sight, you bastards! If you don’t leave this girl alone right now, I’ll make sure your already disgusting faces get even worse!
— they start running away —
Yui: Ayato-kun… thank you!
( He came back for me… )
Ayato: ….
— grabs her hand and starts walking —
*Timeskip*
Yui: ( Ever since Ayato-kun saved me, he hasn’t spoken a word. )
( It’s obvious that he’s mad… )
( But if both of us keep quiet, this conflict will never be solved… )
Ayato & Yui simultaneously: I’m sorry.
Yui: ( Eh? Did he just— )
No… I’m the one who should apologize. I hid that letter, knowing full well the consequences it could have.
However… I only did it because I wanted Ayato-kun to have some free time for himself too.
Ayato: You…
Yui: I’m aware of how much work you have to do, and being king is definitely not easy. That’s why, I really admire your for that.
Nevertheless, it saddens me seeing Ayato-kun so stressed out and exhausted. I want Ayato-kun to be always as energetic and cheerful as he was today, but… I do realize that I’m just being selfish.
Ayato: No… You… You’re not selfish, I am.
I was the one who didn’t listen to your side of the story. It’s just... I’m afraid of failing as king. There, I said it!
I don’t want to put the people I care for in danger, nor can’t I accept being a worse king than that old fart, so all I have to do is carry out my duties. Hell yeah, they’re a pain in the ass but that’s my responsibility now, which is why I can’t back off.
Yui: ( Ayato-kun… I never thought you felt that way… )
N-no, the way you reacted was understandable. Anyone under that much stress might have done the same, and I can’t blame you for it.
Besides, I can’t say your words were wrong. I am indeed incapable of fully understanding the challenges you face, however… no matter what happens, I want you to know that you’ll always be the best king to me…!
Ayato: …!
Heh… you really never change.
— hugs her—
Yui: W-Well, I suppose I can’t change if I do nothing all day.
Ayato: Hmph, are you throwing shade at me for what I told you?
Yui: Eh? No way, it was just a coincidence! I swear!
Ayato: Pfft, proved my point. You'll forever stay the clumsy, stupid, and oddly adorable woman that you are.
Yui: Hey, that’s backhan— Mm…!
Ayato: Nn…
Yui: ( Ayato-kun… his kiss is so gentle… )
( I really missed Ayato-kun’s kisses. I’m so happy…! )
Ayato: Oi, don’t tell me you’re about to cry again.
Yui: I’m not but…
I just want to know, will the letter get Ayato-kun in troubles…?
Ayato: I might get some weird looks for not showing up on time, and maybe a lecture or two, but it shouldn’t be too bad. I was supposed to start on them today since there’s a lot, but... I think I’d rather spend my time with my girl instead.
Yui: Is that so? Thank you.
But doesn't that mean you'll have to work even harder to make up for today?
Ayato: I guess it can’t be helped. I don’t want to think of tomorrow, all I want is to focus on the present.
Yui: Fufu, I see. By the way…
Will you uhm… stay overnight too?
Ayato: Heh~? Is that supposed to be a sex invitation?
Yui: I… T-That’s—!
Ayato: Heh~, don’t even try to get out of it, it’s written all over your face.
Rest assured though, the invitation is accepted~.
— Smooch —
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last night i went to a really fun and informal fundraiser evening with jesse and lucy at westminster school, where they were interviewing each other. i got to ask a question which i’ve mused upon for some time about tom, shiv and greg. enjoy! full transcript under cut
Transcript
me: so i’m gonna have to look at what i wrote down.
jesse: that’s alright, you’re highly in credit since you know more about the show than us. more about john berryman.
(laughter)
lucy: tell us what we’ve done wrong so far!
me: god, no. i wouldn’t! so my question, this is a character based question, and one thing that probably got a bit subsumed in the fourth season just because everything was happening. but i’d like to know more about tom and shiv, and also greg. because my read on the situation between the three of them is that greg is a source of marital strife (laughter) that shiv never noticed, and what would it have taken for shiv to notice the depth of greg’s presence in their marriage.
jesse: uh huh.
me: and tom’s attachment to him.
jesse: uh huh. sometimes you get little bits in life or you see something and you’re like, i wish we were making the show, because i suddenly do want to hear shiv say ‘greg you’re a source of marital strife’.
(laughter)
jesse: that’s like, when you’re like, that’s gonna be in, we’re not gonna cut that.
lucy: absolutely.
jesse: (doing greg voice) wh-wh-what?!
(laughter)
lucy: yeah. well we enjoyed that, didn’t we. we had a scene in america decides, which was the only scene between shiv and greg.
jesse: oh yeah.
lucy: the election episode in the final season where she takes him into a little room and threatens him.
me: ah, but it’s jealousy over lukas, over the greg and lukas thing, and it’s like, have you forgotten your husband, who is also very attached to this limpet?
lucy: yeah. i would also say that there are marriages in which a third party is not an unuseful thing, as well. not in a forgiving way about infidelity, but i would say that there are things that tom can express with and at and on greg (laughter) as it were, to greg, that are useful because he’s both a - you know the great, the interesting thing about tom is that he’s both a courtier and a bully. he’s that rare combination of someone who you totally believe as being almost like (mimes bowing and doffing cap) ‘oh yes sorry thank you yes ma’am’ and also like, ‘i’m gonna kill you’ and that juxtaposition is what makes him so interesting.
but in his marriage to shiv he has no real way, until quite late i guess in the final season, where we explore it, to hold power over her and to use that part of himself. so he’s accepted the acquiescing, he’s accepted the role of courtier in that marriage, and greg is quite a useful place where he gets to express all of that, the bully in him so that maybe it doesn’t have to come out in the marriage. which might be bad, because perhaps it should do and then the marriage would’ve ended much earlier, yknow, when shiv would just be like ‘i’m not dealing with you challenging me in any way’. so it’s not until that balcony scene i think where he really challengers her much at all. possibly the beach scene, where he sort of says that he’s considered leaving her, and how that would feel. but with aggressive challenge? it’s all directed at greg, and greg is allowed to be the place where all those feelings go.
me: but the affection - there’s also affection between them.
jesse: YEAH. and i think that’s the other thing maybe you’re alluding to is like, she… i think, some things you know you’re putting in the show because you talk about them and other things just naturally occur, and audiences and people tell you what the show is and what you put in there and you didn’t even realise, but i think we were aware of this - she’s oblivious. her obliviousness is a big part of her wealth and her upbringing and… so there’s something homoerotic going on between greg and tom.
me: i mean it’s not for me to say.
(laughter)
jesse: and does she… i think there’s two ways of reading that, either she’s oblivious, and that’s intriguing and possible. the other is that she sort of - there’s a scene in, you know that one, in the sun valley media conference in argestes, where we wrote a bit where shiv shows up unexpected and tom’s sort of flirting with someone, and it never really landed that much. i think we were like, oh this really gonna, shiv’s gonna spark up when she sees him flirting with someone. and it’s one of those things where you were like, you know what? i don’t think she gives a hoot, really, does she.
(laughter)
jesse: it’s like, she hasn’t got that, that’s not in her belly, that fear of loss.
lucy: no.
jesse: so i think that goes, that probably goes for a same-sex relationship or flirtation as much as it does for with a woman.
lucy: i think that’s true.
jesse: like she really… even if he was like - and this is not the way that tom would be like - ‘i think i’d like to sleep with greg’, i think she’d be like (mimes looking at watch) ‘when?’.
(laughter)
jesse: (as shiv) ‘not when i’m in the city, that’s weird, tom’.
(laughter)
jesse: i don’t think she’d have any fundamental objection to that.
lucy: that’s true. i think jealousy is quite a low status emotion.
jesse: yes.
lucy: and i think that she would struggle to feel it.
(jesse laughs)
lucy: even if it was present in some way, she would never be able to access it because it would put her too much at a disadvantage. so i think yeah exactly that, it would be like, ‘oh i guess you’re going to fuck that boring woman now are you, tom’ or do that, like… she has to be here (mimes one hand above another hand) so jealousy can’t really be accessed by her. so she might be irritated by greg, but in the way you would be by a mosquito.
me: to her detriment.
lucy: to her detriment, sure, ultimately yeah.
#succession#tomgreg#tomshiv#jesse armstrong#lucy prebble#sorry for the audio quality 😭#they didn’t have mics as it was a very small room and my phone could only pick up so much#lucy put forward the more traditional view of greg being tom’s emotional outlet#but credits greg to prolonging a doomed marriage that otherwise wouldn’t have made it over the first hurdle#i’d never really thought of it that way. greg is actually the third wheel of their marriage lol.#and it’s why the marriage finally goes off the rails when greg does like… usurp her#just by caring about tom#jesse’s answer made me laugh and i think it is probably true#she would feel bound to accept tom asking if he could sleep with greg#and as lucy says it’s because jealousy is beneath her to acknowledge
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Omg yay I love that slightly dirty man!! I was wondering if you’d be willing to do something along the lines of a flower shop au situation, where Carmy is obv still a chef but reader works/owns a place nearby and they end up seeing each other a lot and so on and so forth but also I will devour literally anything about that man so wherever your heart takes you I’m 100% on board <3
He is perfectly dirty! Thanks for requesting babe <3
Carmy Berzatto x fem!reader ♡ 831 words
It’s peak hours, and your shop is completely empty. You’re leaning against the counter by the register, mashing your fingers into your temples and praying to whoever will listen for the noise next door to stop.
It’s some sort of fire alarm, blaring from the shitshow construction zone you’re lucky enough to neighbor. It’s been going since nine this morning. It’s after noon now. No customers will stay long enough to buy anything, not even your regulars who come in looking for a specific book. At this point, you need to either get out of here or get a lobotomy. You head for the side door.
It’s a bad idea. The noise is worse outside, but you’re committed now. You walk paces up and down the alley, blowing puffs of air that cloud in the cold and rubbing your arms because you left your coat inside. You’ve already walked the alley twice when you see him, bare-armed as you but smoking a cigarette like this temperature is just right.
“Hey,” you say, too irritated to be embarrassed, “what the hell is going on in there?”
Carmy shrugs, taking the cig from the corner of his mouth. “The fire alarm won’t stop going off.” Smoke rises into the air as he talks.
“I know. Are you going to do anything about it?”
“We’ve got people on it.”
That’ll mean the Faks, you suppose. You wish this was something you could rage about, but Neil’s a nice guy. He came over to help you board up your window when it broke during a hailstorm last year, and when you brought him a coffee he acted like the beans came from the Garden of Eden.
You take a breath, trying to chill out. “So, are you guys all losing your shit in there?”
Carmy shrugs again. He never really looks at you, you’ve noticed, just sort of near you as if that’s as close as his eyes can get. “Some more than others,” he says. “I don’t mind it.”
“You don’t mind?” you laugh, incredulous. “You must be insane.”
He turns his head to the side, something unidentifiable passing over his expression as he takes a drag. “I know.”
You get the feeling you’ve taken a misstep. You need to say something nice, remind him you’re on the same team. You kick the overflowing dumpster next to you lamely. “Can you believe this shit? They’ve skipped us for two weeks straight now.”
Carmy nods, relaxing somewhat. “It’s bullshit.”
“If they miss us again, I’m gonna have to start bringing our trash to other dumpsters or something. I don’t even know.”
“They won’t miss us again. I’ve got someone making a call.”
You grin. “What are you, part of the mob or something?”
Carmy looks almost like he might be thinking about smiling. You have the urge to take a picture. “My family is Italian,” he says.
“Oh, I know. Richie’s definitely brought it up.”
Carmy blows smoke out, shaking his head in a way you suspect might be fond. “Richie’s not even Italian.”
“Seriously?” A laugh stutters out of you. The wailing siren has faded into the background. You feel lighter than you have all day. “He’s the most Italian guy I’ve ever met.”
“Yeah, he definitely thinks he is.”
You look at Carmy for a moment. There’s always this tautness about him, like he’s perpetually ready to run or punch someone. Right now he’s as close to casual as he ever gets, hunched against the alley wall, but however he’s acting you can see the raised hairs of goosebumps on his biceps. His tattooed, very large biceps. You look away before you can get swept away by that line of thinking.
“Well, even though the noise doesn’t bother you, do you wanna get away from it for a sec?” you ask casually. “It’s not so loud in here. You can barely hear it in the back room.”
“Seriously?” Carmy’s looking at you as though this may be some sort of trap. He’s looking at you, and without explanation the world seems to sharpen into startling clarity. You’re suddenly conscious of your heartbeat. “Uh, yeah.” He glances behind him, seemingly wary of one of his coworkers coming out to stop him. “That’d be cool.”
“Okay.” You open the door, nodding to his cigarette. “You can’t bring that in here, though. I don’t need it smelling up my books.”
“Right, yeah.” He snuffs it half-smoked on the alley wall. There’s a slightly awkward moment where it seems like he’s trying to grab the door for you even though you’re already holding it open, but after a second he ducks inside, something that might be embarrassment stiffening his shoulders. “Thanks.”
“Don’t sweat it.” You let the door swing shut behind you, leading him towards one of the plush couches in the back room. “We’ve got to do what we can to keep each other sane around here, right? A crazy neighbor would be bad for business.”
#carmy berzatto#carmy the bear#carmy berzatto x reader#carmy berzatto x fem!reader#carmy berzatto x y/n#carmy berzatto x you#carmy berzatto x self insert#carmy berzatto fanfiction#carmy berzatto fanfic#carmy berzatto fic#carmy berzatto fluff#carmy berzatto imagine#carmy berzatto scenario#carmy berzatto drabble#carmy berzatto blurb#carmy berzatto oneshot#carmy berzatto one shot#carmen berzatto#the bear fanfiction#the bear#the bear fx#the bear x reader#the bear fandom
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Just Sex
Summary: Melissa is hooking up with the chief at the firehouse, so you decide that you can have your own fun.
WC: ~2.1k
After the failed relationship and proposal with Gary, Melissa has been going out to bars and staying out late at night. She finds herself in bed with quite a few men and women, and while she’s not thrilled that she’s back to this lifestyle, she’s impressed that she still has what it takes. Getting older did not make it any easier to attract people.
But then one night she sees the fire chief out at the bar, one thing leads to the other, and they’re in a friends with benefits sort of situationship.
Of course, all of this comes out when you’re renewing your CPR training certificate with the Abbott clan, and Barbara has made it quite clear that she’s upset Melissa didn’t tell her of this relationship before.
You had been busy trying to pass your test, but now it’s your partner’s turn to go, and you tune back into the world around you.
“But if I were gonna label it, I would say it’s just sex,” you hear Melissa tell her work wife in a low voice.
You don’t really know what she’s talking about, but you shrug it off. That is, until Janine comes back into the room and asks for the gossip. Barbara of course goes off, claiming that her friend of over fifteen years trusts her no more than a common street stranger. It becomes apparent to you that whatever hookup situation they’re talking about has been going on for a bit of time now. You feel a nasty pit settle in your stomach at that.
That pit only grows when you go out with the crew after the CPR course to celebrate the fact that you all passed. Of course, conversation leads back to Melissa and Jacob both having sexual relations with people from the firehouse.
“Well, I think I blew that one,” Jacob groans as he finishes off his aperol spritz. “But let’s talk about you, Mel Mel.”
“There ain’t nothin’ to talk about,” the redhead waves him off. “It’s just casual sex.”
“Casual sex that’s been going on for how long?” Barbara asks with a raised brow.
Melissa purses her lips as she thinks. “Couple weeks now?”
“A month,” Jacob cuts in. “C’mon, Melissa. When are you just going to admit that you like him?”
“I do not,” she states very clearly. “I just need something to take the edge off for me, and… he does that.”
“How kinky is it?” Ava asks, a smirk on her face.
Jacob opens his mouth, and Melissa very quickly shoves her hand over his mouth. “You say a word, and you’re out on the curb faster than you were out with Zach.”
The man’s eyes widen, and he nods quickly. She pulls her hand away from his mouth, and he breathes a deep sigh in relief.
“I’m not looking for a relationship or nothing… not unless the right person comes along,” the second grade teacher says as she finishes off her beer.
Barb turns to look at her work wife with a curious face. She knows of the little crush that her best friend has on you. Melissa just nods at the kindergarten teacher’s silent question.
But you don’t take it that way, because you have no idea that Melissa has had her eye on you since before she broke it off with Gary. You see it that you have no chance with your favorite coworker at all.
Feeling as though you could burst into tears at any given moment, you quietly excuse yourself from the rest of the outing and head for your apartment.
“What was that?” Melissa furrows a brow and purses her lips as she gazes in the direction that you left.
“I’m sure it was just a long day for her is all,” Janine tries to come up with some sort of logistical reason as to why you would leave early. “I did have a meeting with her before school even started today, so she’s been up for quite some time.”
Everybody seems to accept that reasoning, and they continue on with their night.
The next day, you march yourself into Ava’s office bright and early.
“Girl, what are you doin? I’m tryna get this knot out of my back,” your principal groans as she shuts off her personal back massager.
“I need your help,” you tell her, not even bothering to acknowledge that she isn’t doing her job at all.
“With?” She leans forward just slightly in her chair.
You smile at her. “I know you know a bunch of people… set me up with someone?”
“Oh, girl,” she laughs. “What’s gotten into you? Every other time I’ve asked if you want someone, you decline!”
“Just… thinking I should get myself out there,” you shrug. “You know? If Melissa can do it, so can I.”
Ava’s jaw drops. “So this is about Melissa.”
“What?”
“I knew you had the hots for her!” the principal grins.
“What? Not! I- I just figured, if everyone else can have at it, so can I?”
“Oh, girl,” she laughs in your face. “This ain’t you at all, but I am in full support of it. Give me til the end of the day, and I’ll have someone for you.”
You end up going out with a woman that night that Ava set you with, and you do end up actually liking her… and she’s pretty damn good in bed.
The next morning, you’re practically glowing while you drink your morning coffee in the break room. Julie, the woman that you ended up in bed with last night, is texting you about maybe meeting up again later this week.
And if you weren’t still in love with the redhead that comes in a few seconds later, you would say yes. Instead, you send her a text that says, Maybe. Kinda busy the next couple weeks.
She texts you back a picture… a rather scandalous picture. And you blush when you see it.
“What’s got you all giddy today?” the redhead asks as she leans over. She sees the picture before you can close out of it, and her eyebrows creep up her head.
“Who’s that?”
You shrug. “Just someone Ava set me up with.”
“Ava?” Melissa asks in disbelief. “How long have you been seeing her?”
“Not long,” you tell her. “It’s just sex, really.”
The redhead folds her arms over her chest. “I didn’t think you were like that.”
“I’m not, but I figured I might as well give it a shot,” you say. “Now, I have to head to my room to finish up some of my grading, but I’ll see you later.”
You don’t have any intention to see her later. And you don’t. You pull back from her and her group- although most of them still find their ways to you. It’s mostly just the redheaded second grade teacher that you avoid. And it happens that way for a few more days.
You’re in the break room heating up your lunch when Ava comes in. “Girl! Are you gonna text Julie back or not?”
Melissa makes her way in, and you sigh. “It’s just sex. I’m not looking for a relationship or nothing… not unless the right person comes along,” you unintentionally repeat what the second grade teacher had said out at the bar. The microwave indicates that your food is finished, and you pull it out before heading back down to your classroom for lunch.
You miss the scowl on Melissa’s face, but Ava sure as hell doesn’t.
“Girl, you jealous or something?” the principal leans in with a smirk.
“What would I be jealous of?”
“That someone else is hitting that hot piece of ass,” Ava says like it’s obvious. The second grade teacher rolls her eyes, but Ava continues. “I see the way you look at her. Practically undressing her with your eyes every time she walks into the room.”
Melissa crosses her arms again. “I can’t believe you set her up with someone if you knew I like her.”
“I was hoping it would give you a swift kick in the ass that she was gonna start hoeing it up,” Ava shrugs. “Now admit that you’re jealous before everyone else comes in here.”
“Okay, I’m jealous,” the redhead relents. “But it don’t matter anyway. She isn’t lookin’ for anyone- she just said that.”
“She said, and I quote, ‘I’m not looking for a relationship or nothing… not unless the right person comes along. And girl, you’re that person for her!”
Everyone else starts filing in, and Ava makes it so that she looks impossibly bored, although she is actually quite the opposite. “Okay, I’m leaving this snooze fest.” She heads out, but not before giving Melissa a subtle wink and tap on the wrist. “Get it, girl.”
That day, Melissa sits thoughtfully during her lunch period about what Ava said… maybe she’s right? But she can’t be sure, so after dismissal duty, the fiery second grade teacher heads down to the front office and bursts into the principal’s office.
“Schemmenti,” Ava grins. “You do it yet?”
“I ain’t doin’ nothin’ until I’m positive Y/N has a thing for me too,” Melissa sits down across from the woman. “So tell me what you know.”
Ava spends a long time telling the redhead about the various times she’s caught you checking Melissa and only Melissa out, how you always seem to linger around her during events, how the two of you are almost always partners for things now and how you being around always makes her soft and you absolutely bask in her warmth. She even confesses that you went down to her office to ask her to set you up because of Melissa.
“You convinced yet?” the principal asks after ten minutes.
Melissa bites her lip. “Yeah. Okay.”
“I’d make a move quick though. She said something about potentially seeing Julie today.”
“Isn’t that going to piss off your friend that Y/N might leave her for me?”
“She ain’t my friend,” Ava says as she files her nails. “I made a dating profile for Y/N and picked the first mildly attractive woman I saw.”
“You’re unbelievable sometimes,” the redhead pinches the bridge of her nose.
“Maybe, but ain’t you gonna go get your girl?”
Melissa stands from her chair and thanks the principal before rushing out and down your hallway. She hopes to catch you before you head out for the night. And of course, because you’re a dedicated teacher, you’re still there prepping for tomorrow. She knocks on your doorframe and leans against it.
“Just a sec!” you reply cheerily, not turning around yet. You’re hands deep in soil for the gardening project that your students will be participating in tomorrow.
“I don’t got a second,” Melissa says. You whip around at her voice.
“Hey,” you sigh, all joy in your voice gone.
“Don’t go out with Julie tonight,” the redhead tells you.
“Why wouldn’t I?”
“Because I want you to go out with me instead,” she tells you seriously.
“You’re dating the fire chief,” you deadpan.
“I ain’t dating nobody because the only person I want to date is you,” the redhead admits.
That gets you to drop the dirt that is currently in your hands. “What?”
“I told everyone I was just having casual sex and wasn’t looking for a relationship unless the right person came around because… because the only person I would want to be in a relationship is you, and I didn’t think I had a chance.”
“Melissa, are you an idiot?” You ask her. “I’ve shamelessly flirted with you since you broke it off with Gary and practically thrown myself at you in hopes that you would pick me instead of some random hookup.”
She crosses the room, and she’s kissing you before you even know what’s happening. You instinctively kiss her back, and… wow. When you pull away, you quickly wipe the dirt off of your hands before pulling her in close again.
“Don’t go out with Julie tonight,” she pleads again.
“Don’t go out with the fire chief anymore,” you mumble against her lips.
She nods and mutters, “I already called it off. You cancel on Julie, and meet me at my place?”
You end up at Melissa’s house within the hour, and she wines and dines you. And then you end up in her bed seeing stars. Your legs tremble for what feels like forever before she makes her way back up to you.
“And just so you know,” she husks into your ear. “There ain’t nothin’ casual about this. This ain’t just sex.”
Tags: (and let me know if you want to be included!): @schemmentis @thesapphictimelady @marvel210 @itisdoctortoyousir @morgana-larkin @thesamesweetie @doesthatsuggestanythingtoyou @marvels--slut @gwennybriggs @megamultifandomtrashposts @lemz378 @http-sam @melissaschemmentisbranzino @imaginesmultifandoms @sexysapphicshopowner @lilfartbox1 @maybe-a-humanbean @imlike-so-gaydude @sapphicxrat @a-queen-and-her-throne @sunsol-22
#melissa schemmenti fanfiction#melissa schemmenti fanfic#melissa schemmenti x you#melissa schemmenti x reader#melissa schemmenti#abbott elementary fanfic#abbott elementary fanfiction#abbott elementary
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HIII could you write what the boys would be like when they r jealous if you haven’t already please? <3
A/N: This was wayyyyy too much fun. Thanks for the request!
DARRY CURTIS
Darry’s a grown man, too mature for jealousy! But he still gets a little jealous because I say so <3
It’s mostly around his college buddies and the older boys in the gang who sometimes like to make moves just to upset Darry
But Dare trusts you, y’know? If you guys are going steady, he knows you only have eyes for him and he really only has eyes for you
Jealous!Darry though, that means he’s gotta have his hands on you in some way or another, Jealous!Darry wants nothing more to be touching you and he’s gonna get what he wants, believe you me
Hand on your hip, fingers tangled with yours, pulling you back into his chest, you’ve gotta be close to him and he’s gonna make sure of it
Darry will be a little snippy with whoever’s taken to making moves on you, glaring a little bit and using his size for intimidation purposes <3
SODAPOP CURTIS
Sodapop, my love. My little Sodapop. Darling little Sodapop Curtis. No-thoughts-in-his-head Sodapop
I don’t think he’s get jealous, I think he’d just get a little sad, I don’t think he’s capable of real jealousy
I think Sodapop has a lot of inadequacy issues? He knows he’s pretty, but I think he struggles a lot with feeling wanted and needed
So if someone’s trying to hit you up, Sodapop might step between you guys and try to break it up, but he’d be a little sad, wondering if you’d rather be with them than him
If he’s jealous, he gets kind of pouty and sad, and he might pull back from you, try to prevent himself from being hurt
I just don’t think he’s one of those big, loud, aggressive people when he’s jealous, I really can’t see Sodapop as being one of those people
PONYBOY CURTIS
Ehhhhhh, I’m torn on this one, I don’t know if I see Ponyboy as being one of those clearly obvious jealous people, but I can see him getting into a fight with you over something that has to do with his jealousy
Like- if he sees somebody who’s flirting with you and he doesn’t see you try and get out of the situation, he might be a little upset and get a little snippy with you
He’s not really trying to be an asshole to you, he’s just upset and his emotions tend to come out through his words instead of his fists
But at the same time, Ponyboy’s definitely got some of that greaser fire in him though, so I can really see him getting into an argument with someone who may not be leaving you alone
He’ll tell somebody to back off, do a little chest puffing before looking back at you to make sure you’re alright and okay-
He’s not to kind of guy who gets jealous though and immediately tries to make out with you in the middle of a crowded space, I hope I’ve managed to convey that to you guys
DALLAS WINSTON
Dally Winston is one of the most jealous people you will ever meet in your life and I promise you that, I would bet my whole life on that
He’s loud and can be sort of mean and crass when he’s jealous, both in your favor and not, so just be warned-
You’re gonna get in a lot of fights because of his jealousy, I just don’t know what else to tell you, he’s super stubborn
Most likely to try and make out with you because he’s jealous and most likely to try and make moves on you because he’s jealous
Will slip a hand into your pocket and keep a hand on your ass while he stares down whatever idiot thought they could talk to you
He makes it known very fast, whether through a fight or through multiple verbal threats, that whoever decides it’s a good decision to mess with his doll, will have to deal with the wrath of Winston
JOHNNY CADE
I don’t think Johnny gets jealous too often? I don’t see him as being the jealous type, I don’t think he’d notice if you were trying to make him jealous either
Like- I don’t think Johnny is on the same level of jealous as Curly Shepard is, but I do think that he can be a little jealous, especially when it comes to the rest of the boys in the gang
I got an ask about how Johnny would react if reader was bonding a lot with Ponyboy over a book though, and I think that’s a really good plotline to follow to feature some jealous Johnny
Johnny’s not going to be jealous in that situation ^^ unless he starts to see Ponyboy making moves on you, and let’s be real, would Ponyboy really do that?
Johnny would just try and join you, learning about your favorite things so that you’ll talk with him more and not just Ponyboy
I just really can’t see him freaking out over it though, he’s protective, not jealous, so I think that’s a fine line that’s really important to define
TWO-BIT MATHEWS
Happy go lucky Two-Bit doesn’t get jealous often, but I can see it happening every so often, especially if you guys go out to a party and he has a few to drink
Will mostly likely end up in a fight, especially if whoever’s hitting on you doesn’t back off when Two-Bit tells them to get lost
But then again, I can totally see Two pulling you away, claiming he needs to show you something or that he wants to dance and just tugging you away from whoever he no longer wants to deal with
I don’t see you guys fighting? I don’t think Two-Bit would start fights over being jealous unless you were actively doing stuff that made him jealous
Like- if you’re actively flirting with somebody else to try and make him jealous? You have to assume that he’s gonna be upset, that’s not really a nice thing to do
But I can’t see him being mad at you if he’s jealous because of somebody else, I don’t see him being mean when jealous like Dallas would be
STEVE RANDLE
Steve can get a little jealous, I’m not gonna lie to you guys, he’s very protective over you
I think it’s better with the boys? Specifically with Sodapop, but if Dally’s flirting with you, Steve-o’s not afraid to punch him in his yankee face
Jealous Steve gets to be a little pouty and a little needy and, of course, just a little touchy because you can’t look at him and tell me I’m wrong
He’s kissing you, more than what is considered decent, if the opportunity arises and he’s feeling jealous, he thinks it’s a nice way to gain your attention back
Call him a few pet names if he’s upset or literally just hold his face and make him look at you until he calms down, the method is foolproof
He’s a simple boy, he’s gets a little jealous sometimes, all you gotta do is give him some attention and he’ll be right as rain in no time
TIM SHEPARD
Hoo boy, jealous Tim Shepard, more likely than you’d think, he can be just as bad as his younger brother
He can be mean, but like Two-Bit, his meanness won’t be directed at you unless the situation sort of calls for it
Whoever’s made the bad decision to advance on you will have to face big bad Tim Shepard and try and hold their own against his snarls and threats
Jealous Tim is either a handsy Tim or an aloof Tim, there is little to no in between in that situation-
Handsy Tim means he’s keeping contact with you, slipping a hand in your pocket or tracing the seams of your jeans, pushing the line as much as he can before he gets told to stop
Aloof Tim just means he’s having a little self doubt, a little hesitancy because maybe you’d rather be with that other guy, maybe he’s not good enough for you
CURLY SHEPARD
Curly Shepard? Jealous? Every single day of his life, my dear friends, this boy is incredibly, incredibly jealous
You look at somebody else? Talk about somebody else? Listen to someone else? Stand next to someone else?
Curly is pouting and whining, grumbling and complaining because you’re not paying enough attention to him and he’s not pleased
I’m not even joking, it’s literally the smallest things that will set Curly off and once he’s jealous, everyone is going to have to deal with it because he is certainly not afraid to hide
If it gets to that point, Curly is not afraid to throw fists to get your attention back on you and take care of whoever’s decided to talk with you, Curly just likes to use his fists
If you’re bothered by this behavior, I really don’t suggest going with Curly, it’s just the way he is and I doubt he’s gonna change anytime soon
#the outsiders#the outsiders headcanons#the outsiders hcs#the outsiders x reader#dillo’s writing#darry curtis#sodapop curtis#ponyboy curtis#dallas winston#johnny cade#two bit mathews#steve randle#tim shepard#curly shepard#darry curtis x reader#sodapop curtis x reader#ponyboy curtis x reader#dallas winston x reader#johnny cade x reader#two bit x reader#steve randle x reader#tim shepard x reader#curly shepard x reader
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The Sun of Ambrose V (lost Sinclair!daughter reader AU)
Hi everyone, this is the final part of my Sinclair!daughter AU in which the reader is Bo's daughter and she has been taken away and adopted by a new family.
You can find part I here.
Hope you'll enjoy! <3
Warnings: no proof reading, killer!reader, mentions of guilt, violence, murders, blood, some sort of dark angst/comfort
You quite enjoyed your summer break in Ambrose. You loved to sculpt with Vincent, you loved to watch your dad work on a car and to have him show you things, you loved to wander around with Lester. You loved to play with Jonesy as well. Everything felt good. You never slept so well in years, because you were finally feeling safe enough to fully relax.
You hadn’t asked about the tourists anymore because you didn’t have enough strength for more drama for the moment. And whenever people were coming around, the brothers made sure you were busy somewhere else in the town or with Lester. You pretended you didn’t notice anything. You just wanted to be happy.
And for the moment, your own desire to kill has quieted down. You were still feeling sick from the murder of your mother.
The brothers didn’t notice anything amiss; apart from the fact they still hadn’t heard the sound of your voice, you were once again their ray of sunshine. You were making them so full of joy. The twins were talking, late in the night, about the legacy once again. They hadn’t thought they could resume their plans on this matter. They were so relieved.
However they were a little bit concerned about your adoptive father. They were certain that even if the man wasn’t doing too well for the moment, at some point he would want to get “his daughter” back. The twins had no idea how to cut him out of your life without killing him. Bo would love to murder him - out of jealousy - but he knew that you would know it one day, and he didn’t want to upset you that way. Both your mothers already died after all…
You were having a snack in Bo’s garage while he was taking care of a new car. You were sucking on the chocolate that dripped on your fingers, as you were listening to the music your father put on. You were both enjoying each other's presence even if you weren’t interacting directly. Bo was always a lot more at ease when you were in the same room than him or at least in his line of vision. He was still traumatised; he lost you once, and he promised himself it would never happen again.
You slightly jumped when you felt your phone buzzing next to you. You grabbed it and frowned when you saw it was your adoptive father. Bo noticed the look on your face.
“What’s up, baby?” he asked you as he came closer to you. You put your phone on your lap so you could sign
“He is wondering where I am.” you replied, knowing Bo would understand who was the “he”. You father rolled his eyes and groaned
“Oh so he remembered he's supposed to look after ya?” he ironized and your crossed your arms on your chest “Don’t pout” he hummed and kissed the top of your head
“I’ll have to tell him I’m here. I can’t lie to him about that. Just be nice to him, okay? Things are difficult and… And he won’t be happy about the situation because…” you trailed off
“Because what?”
“Well before mom got sick, she discovered I was chatting with you and Vince and Les, and she was worried about me. She wanted to call the cops on you” you explained. Bo didn’t show any emotion but you read in his eyes that he was quite concerned about such news
“Luckily she got sick then” he commented out loud before realising it “Sorry, love, I didn’t mean it like that” he quickly added as you looked away. Luck had really nothing to do with it, you thought.
“Anyway, I will tell him I’m here. And he’ll probably come get me. I’m just gonna make sure he doesn’t call the police or anyone” you promised as you got up and left the garage
You needed to be alone to write to your adoptive father: “Hey dad, are you feeling better? I didn’t really have anywhere to go so I went back to Ambrose. Everyone is very nice to me and Bo is inviting you over (so please don’t call the police, they really didn’t do anything wrong!). Will you bring me back home?”
The answer was almost instantaneous: “Yes, I will. I won’t call the police because I shouldn’t have asked you to go away in the first place. Love you, I’m sorry for everything”
You were relieved, knowing he wouldn’t be lying to you, not after what happened, not when he had failed his mission of taking care of you.
You came back home and settled at the kitchen table, thinking about what to do next. You didn’t want to leave Ambrose but you wouldn’t be allowed to stay here. You tried to busy yourself on some silly games on your phone but soon enough you grew bored. You were feeling quite upset as well. For the first time in weeks, you wanted to kill someone. You needed to express yourself in another way than sculpting or drawing. You needed to take out your frustration on someone, but there was no one to kill here.
Vincent opened the basement door, in need of some water when he saw you. He quickly saw you weren’t your usual happy self. He put an hand on your shoulder for you to look up at him before signing:
“What’s wrong?”
“My adoptive father will come get me. I think he should be here tonight” you replied
“Do you want to go?” Vincent tilted his head to the head, you quickly shook your head
“No, but I can’t really do anything about it”
You could tell that Vincent wanted to say something but didn’t dare and he simply sadly nodded his head at you.
“How about we make something together? Would it cheer you up?” he offered, which made you smile
“I’d love to”
As you focused on the art you were making with Vincent, you forgot about your adoptive father and you forgot about the time. Your need to kill quietened down, but was still there, waiting for you to be on your own to eat you up alive once again.
You were about to finish a sculpture of Jonesy you intended to offer to Lester, when you heard two vehicles coming into Ambrose. You looked at the window, but didn’t recognise your adoptive father’s car. There were lost “tourists” who were following behind Lester’s truck. Vincent tensed and looked at the clock before asking you:
“When do you think your adoptive father will come here?”
“I’m not sure, soon I guess” you shrugged but you saw the panic rising into Vincent’s eye
“Alright. I let you finish the sculpture without me. We have work to do. Stay here, please.” Vincent replied
“What work?” you frowned
“Promise me you will stay here” Vincent asked, firmly signing each work. You understood he was pretty serious about it
“Of course, I promise you, uncle” you finally replied as you sat back down and watched Vincent leave the room and go back into the basement.
You were about to go back to your sculpture when you heard people violently arguing. The “tourists” didn’t seem to be too happy with Bo. Lester was quick to intervene as well. You watched the scene of a man pushing Lester to the ground, and Bo hitting the said man. Your eyes widened at such a display of violence. You nibbled on your bottom lip. Were your family killers, or was it just bad people disrupting the peace of Ambrose?
You saw that things were getting pretty rough between the three tourists and your father and uncle. You wondered where Vincent was, and almost got into the basement to look for him… Until you saw your adoptive father’s car coming into view. He really couldn’t have arrived at the worst moment. He stopped in front of the garage and tried to put himself between Bo and the man, and to appease the situation. Bo asked him to go away, you guessed, according to his gestures. And your adoptive father refused.
You were too far away to see everything, and even more when they seemed to come more into Bo’s garage. You just knew that at some point someone screamed. Two tourists ran away, Lester ran after them with what seemed like a knife, and Bo was covered in blood. You had to stop yourself from leaving the house. You wanted to help, and you wanted to be the one covered in blood. However, you never broke a promise you made to your family before, so you had to be better, you had to stay inside. You didn’t know where your adoptive father was anymore and you grew worried. How could things go so badly after such happy weeks in Ambrose?
Bo grabbed a rifle and was about to go after the tourists when he received a massive hit on the head from behind and fell on the ground. You saw your adoptive father with some mechanic tool in his hands.
You couldn’t stop yourself this time. You took the gun Bo was hiding under his armchair and ran to the garage. You had to stop them, you had to do something about it. You couldn’t scream or you would have. Your legs brought you in front of the two men with such speed, as the adrenaline was pumping into your veins. Before you knew it, you aimed at them.
Your adoptive father who was ready to hit Bo stopped his movement as he noticed you and he brought his hands in front of him. Bo was still on the ground, pretty disoriented by the hit he received on the head. He looked up and saw you. You had never looked so much like a Sinclair before. He knew you were his daughter then; he wouldn’t even be disappointed if you decided to kill him.
You were perfect.
“What are you doing? Shoot him, shoot him! He killed the guy, and he wants to kill us all. Your mother was right, they are murderers!” you adoptive father yelled as you eyes moved between him and Bo
“I won’t hurt ya, baby” Bo whispered to you “Everythin’s alright” he continued, trying to sooth you. And one thing was certain, you wouldn’t stand to never hear him talking to you like that anymore.
You looked back at your adoptive father, tears in your eyes. You wanted to tell him how sorry you were about what you were going to do, about what you did to his wife, but with the gun in your hands, you couldn’t.
You shooted and closed your eyes. His body loudly fell to the ground and you shivered. You looked down at Bo and helped him to get up.
He quickly hugged you before gently rocking you, so you could calm down. You didn’t cry in his embrace, you felt at peace. You felt like everything was as it always should have been.
“Ya alright?” Bo whispered to you as he cupped your face into his bloody hands. You nodded and sniffed.
Screams resonated from the House of Wax and you moved from Bo. You were ready to help, you were ready to kill some more but Bo grabbed your wrist. He softly took the gun from you and kissed the palm of your hand.
“Don’t worry, baby. Les and Vince are taking care of the two others. Ya can rest now. Ya did amazin’. Ya saved me, ya saved the family” he hummed, pride shining into his eyes. “Told ya everythin’ was gonna be alright,” he added as he brought you back against him once again.
You couldn’t fully relax, not knowing if your uncles were doing alright. You kept your face towards the House of Wax, waiting for them. Soon enough, you saw them pulling two bodies out of the museum and you felt the adrenaline leaving you.
“I need to sit down” you signed to your dad who quickly nodded. He opened Lester’s truck and sat you down at the passenger seat, as it was the most comfy place he could offer for the moment. He didn’t want you to see the body of your adoptive father either.
“Stay here, I’ll be back soon” he murmured. He needed to let his brothers know about what happened.
Soon enough, they were all around you. You quickly scanned them, to make sure they were unharmed. They didn’t really know what to tell you. They were happy, of course, but they weren’t too sure how you were feeling. You killed the man who raised you for years, after all.
Truth to be told, you used to feel guilty because of the death of his wife that was driving him crazy, but now they were back together. You felt free. You felt ready to kill again, to kill for the family business.
“Bo told us ya did the right thin’” Lester told you and you gave him a soft smile “Feelin’ all good?” he asked and you nodded.
“You don’t have to feel bad for having… killed him, you know. You protected your real father, you protected us. You did what you had to do” Vincent signed to you, even if Bo and Lester weren’t too sure that reminding you you killed him was a good idea. To their surprise, you relaxed into the seat and nodded again.
“I am a Sinclair” you said in a rough voice you hadn’t used in years.
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Taglist : @murder-hobo - @lacychick ; @magical-sass ; @limehaspassed ; @loveinglymessedup ; @bloodmoon-bites ; @iwantsleepplz ; @kawaistrawberry21 ; @12gaugefalls ; @kriston1210 ; @slushi-chan
#house of wax x reader#bo sinclair x reader#bo sinclair x daughter#bo sinclair x you#vincent sinclair x reader#vincent sinclair x niece#vincent sinclair x you#lester sinclair x reader#lester sinclair x niece#lester sinclair x you#slasher x reader#slasher x daughter#slasher x you#slasher x slasher#slasher x y/n
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Bro what happened in the nevercord?? I am not a part of it but still curious
EDIT: please look at @thelesbomancer ‘s post/reblog, and @gothwineaunts ‘s post about this situation!
please defer to your own judgment when it comes to this, and don’t use my post as the end all be all! Those two posts have much more information on all of this! This post was made as this all unfolded and might be out of date (also turning off reblogs because i’m not an authority on this )
i'm gonna be careful not to name any names here because I don't want to start a hate train and I'm looking at all of this as neutral as possible and also please please please don't think of this like a call-out post or anything, it's not! I still think you can be a fan of rnf and support their work, this is just why I'm chosing to take a break from doing so!
Content Warning below for mentions of explicit content being sent to minors ( by a server member, not RnF, THANK GOD )
i don't have all the details but basically, someone was banned for sending heavy nsfw/pornographic images to minors, and then was unbanned later on because of two reasons
one: the children the images were sent too were banned from nevercord for varying reasons ( closest explanation I remember is about these kids doing witchhunts, whatever that means )
two: the evidence was apparently "unreliable" and heavily censored.
Also, the minors themselves didn't report this information, an adult did with screenshots, censoring the users of the kids.
The offending person claimed that they never knew the ages of the people talking to them and thought they were all adults, even though at least two victims from my knowledge have come forward and said the person did, in fact know their ages. The only age I've heard for sure was 12 years old.
My problem with the situation arised was when Red, the writer of Nevermore, posted a lengthy explanation that was pretty poorly worded. She used phrases about the situation, such as "egged on" or "cried wolf" about being sent this sexual content, saying it was the job of minors to stay safe on the internet. I was raising my eyebrow at that point, because the whole thing sounded rather victim-blamey.
Red then said that the evidence was faulty and suspicious for being heavily censored ( i don't know the full extent of the censoring ), and because of the fact it came from one person, an adult who was friends with some of the people who had been banned, implied reporting that behavior was all some sort of tatic to get one person they didn't like banned.
When a ton of people were (understandably, in my opinion) very upset by this response, including the victims, and other neutral parties, Red got very upset and started lashing out. I understand It had to be a stressful situation, having tons of people talking at you at once, but she started saying rather guilt tripping things, such as "I'm a horrible person then" "everything I do is actually for evil purposes", stuff along those lines. Admittedly, the situation was pretty upsetting to me, so once Red started saying those things I left. I might return to Nevermore one day, if there's signs of change and the like. I still deeply enjoy the comic, and the community! I don't think RnF are horrible people, I just think they worded this very poorly, and then continued to lash out when it didn't go as excepted lmao I'll grab some of the screenshots I took, and ask if my friends have any to add! If anyone else has anything to add about the situation, please do so in the notes or reblogs! I'm just saying my perspective here, and why I chose to leave! There might have been things I missed! screenshots below!
anyways, those are all the screenshots i have on haha, again for the millionth time I dont want this to become a massive big drama
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AITA for sleeping with a 20 year old?
tw: mentions of potential grooming, age gap relationships, nsft/nsfw, vague discussions of sex
So, me (38m) and my wife (39f) are in an open relationship. Basically, we’re both bisexual and not quite ready to limit our sex lives to one person yet. So, we decided to allow friends with benefits situations outside of our relationship. No romantic stuff, no dating, just sex.
In January, my wife went to stay at her best friend’s (28f) house and have some fun together. I don’t mind at all, I was kind of glad to have our apartment to myself for a week. Now, there’s this queer bar that me and my wife frequent and it’s a good mix of all age demographics and identities.
There’s this one trans guy, I’ll call him M, that most people in the local community know because he’s very attractive. He reminds me of a very short Eric Draven mixed with Eddie Vedder. (Oddly specific, I know) Like, he has long-ish curly brown hair, big brown eyes, the sweetest smile ever and he dresses very well. A little grunge here, a little rockstar there. Good jewelry. You get it.
I always catch people staring at him when he’s at the bar with his friends. (We live in Europe btw, legal drinking age is 18.) In short, I find him very cute. He’s basically a micro celebrity among the community and he doesn’t even know it.
So, while my wife was away I went down to the bar and his friend group invited me to come sit with them. We started talking, he’s super funny and we began talking about Pearl Jam because of the shirt I was wearing. Found out he’s obsessed with the music scene of the 90s, specifically rock and grunge, and I happen to have a collection of merchandise of the big 4. I invited him to come check it out and he eagerly accepted. None of his friends wanted to come, so it was just us two. Showed him the stuff, he got super excited about it and I even let him keep one of my Soundgarden shirts and some CDs.
I offered to cook dinner, we ate and then had some weed brownies for dessert. We got posted on the couch, talked for a good while and he began confiding in me. I’m not gonna go into detail because that’s shitty, but he basically told me he’d never had a positive sexual experience up to that point. Apparently all of his exes were switches leaning submissive and he’s purely submissive, so things never really worked out and he never finished with any of them.
I told him about me and my wife’s arrangements and some other stuff about our sex life. (Don’t worry, my wife is 100% okay with this. Even in this context.)
Here’s where I might be the asshole, if not the creep:
Now, I was pretty high at that point and I joked about how I could give him a positive experience. To my surprise, he actually eagerly accepted. I was a bit hesitant because we were both buzzed, but he kept reiterating that he’s consenting and that he’s sure he wants this. So, I made sure he had a good night and he actually ended up sleeping over and we cuddled. It was super nice and he seemed genuinely ecstatic about it the next morning, it was adorable. I was honestly just happy that I was able to give him a positive sexual encounter.
We exchanged numbers, kept texting for two days and he ended up coming over again. Had some more fun together and he went to go sleep over at a friend’s place. At that point, I sort of realized that I may be catching feelings for him. Which is against me and my wife’s rules and also just a horrible idea, especially considering the age gap. So, I let him know that I need some distance and he was super understanding. He was understandably a bit disappointed but didn’t complain or anything.
Once my wife came back, I told her about everything. This is just a thing we do because it helps avoid speculation and unnecessary jealousy. We always tell each other about what happens with our other sexual partners, but only if they consent to it. Which most of them do because they’re our friends. She seemed a bit unnerved by it, not because of the fact that I had feelings for him, but because of the age difference. She said it’s weird and predatory and told me she needed some time to think.
Apparently, she went to go check in on M and asked him if I pressured him into anything. He said it was a 100% mutual thing and he’s very much into older guys, so he enjoyed it quite a lot.
This put her mind at ease but I’m still quite shaken by it. I never stopped to consider the fact that the age difference is quite concerning. I can’t help but feel like a nasty creep that bribed some poor 20 year with old band shirts to come sleep with him. I don’t like that I didn’t even think about it. Talking with M came so easy and we share a lot of interests. I’m not about to go and say he’s 'mature for his age' because he isn’t, he acts like any other 20 year old.
I was just so focused on how attractive and interesting he is to me, I fear I might’ve acted extremely selfish and should’ve stopped to take his lack of experience and his naivety into account. Of course he’d sleep with me, he’s 20 and doesn’t know any better. It should’ve been my job, as the older adult, to put a stop to it. Please don’t hesitate to give it to me straight.
AITA?
What are these acronyms?
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can someone pls explain to me the allure of the face huggers thing? not kink-shaming, kink-inquiring, i’m fascinated by y’all
Yeah of course.
So the face huggers actually encapsulate multiple kinks in my mind and all of those kinks have their own allure but put together I just *fans self*
So I'm just going to start off with the worst of it to get it out of the way, and also to (in good faith) show that I have enough understanding of the themes within alien(and specifically around the face huggers) to understand the horror alongside the kink:
It's a rape monster. Point blank period, the whole horror of the face huggers is the forced insertion, and the violence of penetration which ultimately impregnates and kills the host in the ultimate violation of their bodily autonomy. The host is physically incapable of removing the face hugger, thus prolonging the violation as well as forcing them to carry their parasite "to term." Horror upon horror. Truly a nightmare I would never want to experience in the actual context of the alien series.
Now onto the kink and the fantasy of it all.
It's a rape monster: non-con kink.
Forced insertion: more non-con kink, but specifically force insertions are a kink.
Eggs: oviposition kink
forced pregnancy: another non-con kink, again specifically forced pregnancy. Which also leads into a non-con breeding kink.
Ok that's a lot of non-con kink stuff! What's appealing about that?
I'm gonna be honest with you friend, it's sort of a "you get it or you don't" situation for a lot of people. The appeal though is the same as with most D/s dynamics. You have someone giving up control, and someone taking it. In this case it's a forced submission, and in the fantasy of it, this wouldn't kill me and it would feel good, and it would basically be a monster fuck machine suction cupping itself to my pussy to pump me full of eggs.
I've talked at length about how common "rape" kinks are and the way that society has a hand in creating them if only because it looks down on consenting to sex so much. Especially women saying yes to sex? There's this thought of, "well I'm not a whore if I didn't say yes to it" it sort of takes the blame off the submissive, and there's some power dynamic stuff to it as well, but that's sort of the most bare bones basic gist. In a society where saying "yes" is demonized we shouldn't be surprised when people turn saying "no" into a kink.
Now... the allure of the actual spidery thing is sort of hard to explain. In my mind it looks like a vagina with a dick where the hole should be. I like both of those things, and I like having my mouth on them, so... I mean... idk that feels self explanatory.
So that's my shitty explanation. It's a lot of kinks all jumbled together in what looks like an easily transportable packaging. I think if the face hugger was a sex toy that someone had invented it would have a very different connotation to it.
Here's this thing that will stick to whatever hole you want it on, and it'll just make itself happy by fucking you for as long as it can. The eggs are their own thing but I think the idea of having something that rubs up against my sweet spots is really fucking appealing. And for people that have a breeding kink but are maybe scared of the pregnancy aspect, oviposition fills that niche where you're definitely bred but it's not going to hurt the eggs to push them out. Also tummy bulge.
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