#and I’ll admit my heart did hurt a lil

[mysindividual]

Unknowingly, he admits | Aaron Hotchner

MASTERLIST

pairing: Aaron Hotchner x fem liaison reader

summary: another late night at the FBI meant you were once again buried in paperwork at Hotch’s office. But tonight, something was off—you were unusually quiet and distracted, a rare sight that caught Aaron’s attention. Intrigued, when he gets his answer, he tries to stop you from making that very same mistake, but doesn’t realise it’s for his own selfish reasons.

warnings: age gap, boss x subordinate, ex talk, mentions of divorce, Hotch being hot and reader is all (๑♡ .̫ ♡๑) once again

I do not consent to having my work translated or reposted to any other site. That being said I do not own the characters portrayed in this story!

"Straight through the glass door, then right." You stood at the entrance, signalling with your hand, explaining to the man who miraculously managed to get lost to your office.

"Oh, thank you." He turned to look at you once more, a mischievous but beautiful grin plastered across his face. "By the way, I'm Agent Nathaniel Smith."

He reached forward to shake your hand when you replied, "SSA Y/N. Nice to meet you."

Once he took off, you leaned on a door frame of your office, arms crossed over your chest. Then bobbing your head to the side, your gaze followed after the man as you admitted he was even better looking from behind.

Tight handshake, round from behind…

Pouting, you nodded at the thought.

"You meant Soft Spot Aaron’s (SSA) Y/N." A familiar voice came out of nowhere, humming in your ear. You jumped in your place, looked at him over you shoulder and rolled your eyes. Entering the office, Derek came in after you.

"What's up kiddo, you're not in the mood? You didn't like my friend Nathaniel there?" He teased, beaming widely, and pointing his thumb towards the exit where the man had left. You looked at him under your brows as you slumped back in your chair.

"What do you want, Derek?" You answered with a tinge of annoyance in your tone.

"Ah, that hurt." His hand on his heart feigning pain. With one leg propped on the edge, he perched himself on the table, enjoying a sip of coffee from his black FBI cup. You’d enjoy some coffee too. "Tell me, what's bothering you?"

"Ah, Derek..." You breathed out, leaning back in your chair, looking at the ceiling, fingers knitted at your stomach. "I don't think you want to hear that.”

He raised an eyebrow. "That bad? You know that’s my jam, I’m all ears, baby."

Deliberately raising your brow at him, you straightened in your seat and rolled your chair towards the table. “Really?”

“Is that a challenge?”

“Wanna make a bet?”

“Sure I do, lil pumpkin.”

When you expressed a sense of superiority through a subtle yet discernible smirk, it wouldn’t be a lie were you to say that panic sprang through Derek’s eyes. So you quickly added, “Game on.”

~

Not long after Derek stormed out of your office, repeating ‘No, no, no!’ more to himself than you — either because he just lost money or because of the thing you’d told him — Hotch appeared at your door. You didn’t notice him, slumped back in your chair, one leg across the other, your hands playing with a pen.

If it weren’t for the two knocks against the door frame you wouldn’t have even noticed him.

You straightened your back, sitting more appropriately.

“Are you ready?” He inquired, his eyebrows inched upward as he looked upon you.

“Yeah. I’ll be there in a minute.” Even through the smile that quirked on your lips at the sight of him, your eyes held the smallest hints of concern.

──────────────────────

"Is everything ok?" His voice, simultaneously stern and gentle, pierced through the hush that crept inside his office’s walls.

"Huh?" You hesitated, completely engrossed in the paperwork you were completing. It wouldn't be incorrect to say that you had no idea how you had managed to do it properly when your thoughts were occupied by something else. You were pleased when Hotch finally did speak and directed your attention towards him. Towards something that potentially could brighten your mood. “Yes?”

“Yes,” he replied, maintaining eye contact with you. “You've been unusually quiet."

You arched an eyebrow. "Is that supposed to be an insult?" Leaning back, you took a moment to escape all the work and overwhelming thoughts. "Are you suggesting I talk too much?"

Hotch recognised that small smile of yours, small but enough to encourage anyone — to rouse him.

Hotch knew you.

He responded in his very recognisable calm and professional voice. “That's what you said."

It felt like you two were having this conversation recently, but now the roles had been switched.

"Truth." You leaned in towards the table, reaching for the pen. "No, everything is fine."

But that itch in your head didn't give you peace, and you didn't have the will or enough concentration to continue working any longer with that on your mind, so you blurted out.

You sighed, running a hand over your face. “You remember Brad?”

You said it without even knowing why, perhaps because you needed someone to confide in without fear of judgment. Was Aaron Hotchner really that person? Anyway, there was no going back now.

“Brad?” Hotch furrowed, only a hint of a confusion gracing his features before realisation kicked in. “Brad.” He repeated his name blankly, then leaned back in his chair.

Perhaps not.

Of course Aaron knew your ex-boyfriend Brad. Everyone did. And no one liked him.

Well, they were kind of right.

The reason you'd been a bit absent — and why Derek stormed out of your office earlier — was because of your ex-boyfriend. A couple days ago, following your conversation with Hotch regarding his divorce, you got a message on your cell phone. Unknown number. Before even reading the whole message, you had quite a good laugh once you read Brad’s name signed at the end of it. Apparently, he wanted to see you. Of course, you would not consent in meeting him even in a state of madness.

But, having a mutual friend was never a good idea. Brad showed up at the bar last night while you were out with said friend. You were initially just being sarcastic, the irony was coming through. But as time went by, somehow Brad managed to soften you through conversation and touch.

The thought made your skin crawl.

“Yeah… That.very -same -Brad.” You spoke in a hushed tone, your voice quivering as you glanced sideways. Everywhere except Hotch. Suddenly, saying it out loud to Hotch wasn’t your best plan. You were almost too shy admitting it. Or rather, admitting it to him. Saying it out loud made Aaron's presence in your chaos feel intimate and somewhat intrusive.

And why?

It was not the first time you two talked about personal lives, dammit, it wasn’t even a hundredth time! You had spent countless days and nights working together, on cases and press conferences, bars and restaurants with the rest of the team, and talked everything out of your lives.

Yet somehow this felt different.

Was it because you were talking about potential someone in your life? Or were you ashamed of admitting to Hotch you were even considering going back to that fool? Were you actually confessing to Aaron Hotchner himself — your boss — it had been a while since you had someone, that you had been that lonely and… needy?

Ugh.

Nonetheless, Aaron could sense the irony and uncertainty as you replied. He toyed with the pen, shaking it slightly in between his index and middle finger as his other hand held his hip.

The things he unknowingly did to you…

“And what does that very same Brad want? To reconcile?”

You quickly looked up at him again.

“I…” you opened your mouth, but the words died on your tongue. His brows were drawn together in a sympathetic concern, his eyes glowed with an inexplicable intensity… Something you couldn’t quite put your finger on.

Did he actually care? To think anything else might have been in question would be insane. But Hotch’d always been protective over everyone in his team, and you were one of them. And no one ever liked Brad, so the stare he had been giving you made perfect sense. “Well… yes. Apparently.”

“And you are distracted by that why exactly?” There was no change in his even voice as he observed you, shifting his head from one side to other. The dim lighting coming from his desk lamp cast dancing shadow across his face.

“Don’t tell me you’re thinking about reconciling with…” He halted in self-control, exhaling as his eyes slowly closed and opened. Fatigue washed over him, Aaron concluded. Regardless, he wouldn’t want his professional facade off, at least not when such a topic was in talk. “Very same Brad.”

You would have almost laughed at that, but only managed to smile and shake your head. Brad was not it, you knew that. And yet you were still thinking about it, and why, you wouldn’t know. You didn’t have the answer. Maybe you were bored, or perhaps tired of waiting for someone right to come your way.

It’d been a long time since you had a proper date, to be quite frank. One that didn’t end up in you yawning your boredom away, having Penelope fake call you to leave, having to really leave for work, and so on. It had been depressing to say the least.

You didn’t have anyone or anything planned in your love life for months. The only thing going on in that field (if one could even consider it that) was the crush you had had on Hotch that was somehow worse than pms’ mood swings. One day you liked him, the next day you wanted to rip his hair out. You also knew Hotch was within the reach, and considering and hoping something might have happen with the two of you was equal to hoping for snow in the middle of July somewhere in south Italy.

Your crush on him was there just to spice up your boring day.

Or so you thought most of the time.

“I knew you guys wouldn’t approve. You never liked him.” Is all you said, beaming widely at Aaron. He, of course, didn’t miss the hints of sadness either in your voice. It bothered you for whatever reason that much that you hadn’t been acting all giggly like your usual self.

Aaron’s eyes darkened as he leaned forward, his elbows on the edge of his table, his hands drawn together in front of him. “And you… like him?” The tone he spoke in was low and measured, almost intimate.

The tone that felt like a caress.

The gaze that made you feel like you were made of glass and he was too focused to let it drop.

You gulped.

“I- I don’t know.” You whispered through a nervous smile.

You lied. You knew that, Hotch knew that. And the thought of that pinched at your heart.

Some mistakes were just not worth making twice.

“If you are asking about my opinion… which I suppose you might not, but I can’t sit here and watch you make that mistake. But of course, this is about you and what you want.”

To Hotch, this was completely normal. It was almost like a friend helping a friend, or rather a boss advising his subordinate. After all, you were there for him when he needed company — when he parted his path with Haley. So, no, nothing unusual.

Everyone on the team disliked Brad. When she first got on the team, she was in relationship with Brad. They’d been together for three years, Aaron remembered. But not long after joining the team, they split up. Even back then everyone cheered her on and told her it was the right thing to do. Everyone except him, but the reason was that she was a newbie at the time, so of course he didn’t want to pry. Now, it was different… somehow.

“I know you don’t think he changed, you are not naive. But do you think it’s worth it?” His gaze assessed you for a moment before his dark eyebrows lifted, pausing briefly before he continued gingerly. “Does he notice the way you bite inside of your cheeks to stop yourself from saying something you might regret? Or the way you play with your earring when you’re not really paying attention, lost in your own schemes? That stress and all the pictures that come through your desk make you reach for favorite snack in comfort? Or that you smile the most when you have the most in your head?”

Silence.

Brad was suddenly long gone from your brain. The words Hotch spoke made a vertigo in your head, lying to you that there was more to it than it seemed. But at the moment nothing was more important than those little lies he you fed yourself with.

But then your gaze fell upon his hand.

The wedding ring still firmly and warmly hugged his finger making your heart drop.

Hope is the joy of a fool, so they say.

Not that you desired him to divorce Haley. Never. It just reminded you that Haley was and would still be a huge part in his life, and nothing, nothing could ever happen between the two of you. He would always love Haley. So it was indeed a good reminder to keep your head cool, your expectations zero.

His eyes averted for a second or two before he looked up at you again, adding softly — in his voice a mix of gentleness and playfulness. “Or the way your eyes get big and dark when you plead…”

A softness came over your features, a semblance of a smile gently flickered onto your lips. “You know about that?”

Hotch gave you a look that said “Of course I know about that”.

Busted, you nodded. “Of course you do.”

He sighed softly, his face showing exhaustion, a craving for care and an opportunity to relax.

“Now, I know it’s the whole point of our job. To profile people. To notice such things about others, but… Our other half should be just as considerate and aware of us. And I believe you deserve better.”

As he breathed the last words out, he leaned back, his head resting on the back of his chair, the almost see-through fabric of his shirt hugging his broad shoulders. Reaching up his collar, he unbuttoned the shirt — not very chastely as thought it were suffocating him, and loosened his tie.

It was suddenly getting warm with everything he had on his mind — work, fatigue and insomnia, Haley and Jack, divorce, you…

Yeah, you also.

As he closed his eyes, something between a sigh and a moan escaped his throat.

And while all this was happening in front of your eyes, you were practically melting in your seat at the sound he made, at the sight in front of you. You gaped at your boss unashamedly, as if you were hypnotised, your lips slightly parting and only then feeling the dryness of them. You swallowed, wishing you could drink in that sight of him. Oh, you so wanted to… many things. You envisioned getting up from your chair, leaving a trail on his table with your fingers as you made your way towards him before settling down onto his lap and leaving kisses up his jaw.

“Hotch…” you called out absent-mindedly, slowly, as though the words left you without your consent, still very lost in your imagination. “You are right. I deserve something far better than him.”

Not really hearing what you had said, he winced back, eyes and hands searching for a file on his desk. “We should get back to work. I need you to take a look at this report on the press conference you held in Kansas City.”

Trying to shake off that picture in your head, you reached for the document he held for you and put it down on the table. The letters were mix of some unknown words, your eyes only skimming over the files.

If concentrating was hard before, now it was completely impossible.

Sneaking a small look at him, you contemplated about the words he said just minutes ago.

You weren’t stupid — you were aware he’d have to pick up a few ticks and tells of yours and everyone’s on the team, but did he then also know about your silly little crush, and how attracted to him you were? Had he been profiling you all this time like he profiled the unsubs? Did he go in depths into his profiling of you? The thought made your heart squeeze in regret of some not-so-appropriate thoughts and actions you had done.

But then again, deep down you knew he didn’t. It didn’t make sense. Things would have been way different between the two of you had he known.

At last you concluded it was all right.

And that was when you realised he was right.

You had been fidgeting with your earring! Quickly stopping, cursing yourself inside, you took the paper in your hand, giving your best to concentrate and read.

You didn’t even notice you’d had that tick, Brad knew even less.

But Hotch knew. The thought made your heart waltz inside your chest, it was almost too hard not to smile.

But what you also missed was that Hotch had seen your actions causing a quick, but not small smile spread across his lips.

“So I thought we don’t profile each others,” you added, pretending to had been reading the report as silence had spread between you two. “And you say I’m not naive.”

Looking up at him under your brows, you didn’t expect he would have already welcomed you with a biggest grin you’d ever seen on him.

You both chuckled out loud, shaking your heads.

“I didn’t profile you…”

“Aha, aha.” You spoke over him, pretending you didn’t want to listen, like you didn’t believe him. “So you’ve said.”

“When you spend time with someone, you have to notice…”

Long into the night, soft chuckles and small voices could be heard outside of his dimly lit office.

A profiler never misses.

Or that was an excuse he said to himself.

[yerrmar]

❧ GLUE SONG pt5☙

warning: swearing, talks of getting freaky, reader is a figure skater, she/her usage for reader.

summary: you hate the whole of your dads hockey team but especially his favourite player Luke Castellan but why did wearing his jersey feel so right.

evie’s notes: the fact that this is almost over is making me a lil sad☹️

pt4|pt6

yn.ln

♬Tate McRae • Greedy

Liked by thelukecastellan and others

yn.ln i did not have a good time, till luke almost busted his head open

thelukecastellan wow what if i got seriously hurt? and the fact that you posted it too princess really hurts my feelings😔

yn.ln maybe learn how to sit down then dumbass

thelukecastellan you wound me💔

thelukecastellan can’t lie thought you looked real good in my jersey maybe even a little better than me

yn.ln a lot better

thelukecastellan yeah but i cant admit that publicly

yn.ln you just did🤭

seaweedbrain EW EW EW TAKE IT TO THE DMS

thelukecastellan didn’t know you where so good at cheering maybe you should be a cheerleader

yn.ln what like your personal cheerleader?

thelukecastellan obviously what else would i mean😉

yn.ln i’ll think about it😋

wisegirl no i’m with percy on this one please take it to the dms

clarlarue i’m choosing to ignore those other comments because i want to tell you how BEAUTIFUL you look

yn.ln AHH I LOVE YOU CLAR

xo.silena not you acting like you weren’t cheesing through the whole game and making heart eyes a luke

yn.ln urm okay didn’t take you as a liar silena

thelukecastellan heart eyes? awh princess i’m flattered🥰

yn.ln i’m keeping your jersey

thelukecastellan it’s all yours

tags:

@s0urw00lf @lucylovesme @blairfox04

[hana-no-seiiki]

REPLACED.

YANDERE! ROCKSTAR (FEROZE KHAN) x GN! MANAGER / PA ! READER x YANDERE! POP IDOL (JISOO HAN [EVE] )

FEROZE BELONGS TO MANAGER READER AND @moyazaika !! Just wanted to make a lil gift for my lovely moot 💋

[ Part 2 : REHEARSAL ]

You were absolutely terrified.

Lord knows how you were able to get the Feroze Khan to agree with collaborating, with a “goody two shoes” pop idol who flirted to hell and back with you, no less. But you just knew someone was going to get hurt by the end of this.

Eve used to be your client before you were dumped into the depths of hell. Aside from the flirtations and clinginess, he was a dream to work with as a manager. He never got into scandals, and he worked day and night to be the best in his craft. You never had to worry when it came to his career. You however, took that for granted and left him the moment you got a better deal. Getting to work with a junior idol vs a seasoned rockstar, the choice was obvious was it not?

Nope.

Eve making tons of songs about heartbreak only poured salt into the wound. You saw him as your little brother almost, it was hard seeing him grieve for your presence. You felt heartless. Guilt ate you up from the inside out. You were lucky he didn’t try contacting you after it all.

Until now.

heeeyyy there! beena while. you workin with Feroze at the moment right???

You squinted at the DM you received. As a manager you were used to dealing with all sorts of texts. Thirsty ones, death threats, collaboration requests. But none of them made your heart beat this quickly. Was it out of excitement, nervousness, or terror? You didn’t know.

I am.

short and straight to the point as always!! i’ve always loved that about you

∧,,,∧

(  ̳• · • ̳)

/    づ♡

take my love, wontchu?

You covered your mouth and squealed.

“The fuck?” Feroze looked up from his guitar at the noise you made. He had to admit it was cute but it did ruin a recording of his.

“Sorry, I’ll go outside.”

“No, stay. I need you here.”

You simply nodded, already used to his obsession with you at this point.

annyyyywaysss i just wanted to ask if you could secure a collab with me n mr. khan?

been tryin to get ahold of him but all i got back was radio silence 🥶

but i know if it’s you, the bestest manager ever, i’ll be able to collab with the bestest rockstar in the world!!

i’ll be a good boy i promise!! pretty please with a cherry and me on top?

Somehow you doubted that. But as your own self appointed protocol states, you must report the matter to your client.

“Feroze, you’ve got another collab request.”

“Was it the person that got you squealing?”

Oh no, you did not like his tone. Jealous Feroze was a monster to deal with. “. . . Yes ? “

“Go for it.”

“What? D-don’t you want to hear about their music style and what not before you—“

“I just have one condition. They have to come to me.”

And, you were doomed.

“Right. I’ll schedule a meeting.”

You stand corrected. They got along well. A bit too well for your liking. You didn’t have to stand awkwardly there while Feroze glared (as he usually does) at his collaborator. In fact they were even conversating! And it wasn’t small talk…

“Mr. Khan! You’re even dreamier up close.”

Your employer even seemed to be amused by Eve’s personality. “I could say the same for you, Eve right? Like the biblical Eve? And please, call me Feroze.”

“Yeah! They thought it’d be a nice call back to my more . . . type of music.“

“Type of music you say. . .”

“You thinking what I’m thinking?”

“Oh, you bet I am.”

Why do you have a feeling you were being replaced?

YOU RECEIVED A SPECIAL POSTER!

Check it out?

[ ✅ YES ]

[ PART 2: REHEARSAL ]

tempted to make a bl/mlm spin off of these two fr fr

©️ hana.no.seiiki - yun | moyazaika | 2023

[ijwrsmff]

I would like to request a Riddle Rosehearts x Reader where reader really struggles with studying so he has to come up with a “reward” system :3 - 🥀

Hi hi!!! My first TWST fic! Riddle is good boy, I used to think he was kind of annoying. But that was before I really got much into the story and now I completely agree, that he is precious baby boy. He got some issues, but who doesn't? XD

Here's a cute lil fic for the boy! Enjoy <3

Word: 1,552

“I’m sorry, housewarden…” You mumbled, looking at the ground ashamed. It was supposed to be a simple test, but you had nearly failed it. Riddle wasn’t one to tolerate lower grades, and wanted to be the best house in the school. At least, that’s what he pretended to want more than anything. He really just wanted everyone to have the chance to succeed. You knew that, and it only made you feel worse when he began scolding you over the grade. 

He sighed, and rubbed his face as if to hide the irritation he was feeling. “This is your first semester here, you need to be able to keep up with your studies if you want to succeed. I won’t stand by when one of my housemates is fumbling on a simple test.” He glared at you, but the glare softened as your face only looked ashamed. There was a twinge of pain in his heart at the look, and he took a step closer. 

“Look, if you’re struggling with concepts, you can come to me or your housemates. There are plenty of students here who have struggled with those topics, but we’re here to help each other.” He straightened his back slightly, and tried to give you a reassuring smile but it seemed almost forced. Riddle almost left it at that, but something was nagging at him. 

“We’ve talked numerous times, you’re exceptionally smart…I don’t see how these concepts are difficult for you.” He turned to look at you fully, his expression curious as he tried to figure it out without you even answering. It obviously didn’t work, but his mind had run through numerous scenarios in the short amount of time it took you to speak up in response to his question. 

You felt a bit embarrassed, and a small blush crept onto your cheeks from his gaze. You shrunk in on yourself slightly, and mumbled a small, “I’m…I’m really bad at studying. I just can’t seem to focus on it for very long at all…” Tears were nearly falling down your face, ashamed to admit that…focusing on things you didn’t like was straight up impossible most days. You hated the fact that you’d made your house warden disappointed in you, and it made you feel like a failure. 

Riddle made a surprised gasp when he saw your tears start to fall, and took a step closer to you, reaching out hesitantly. “H-Hey! It’s alright! We can…we can work on it together, okay?” His voice was panicked, and it seemed like he thought he was the reason you were crying. He’d continue to beat himself up over that, but for now he needed to comfort you somehow. He put a hesitant hand on your shoulder and said softly, “We’ll figure it out. I think I know how to help. Give me some time, I’ll be back.” 

With that, he rushed out of the room and you heard his door slam shut behind him. Your jaw dropped, and you wondered what he had planned. But he just left you here to cry! That’s so rude! Though…he did say he would try to help. You hadn't exactly had an overwhelming amount of conversations with him, so you weren’t sure what he intended to do. You wouldn’t even find out until two days later, since Riddle seemed to be talking to everyone in the door aside from you. 

It kind of hurt, how he said he would help, but numerous other students you considered friends mentioned Riddle talking to them about you. If he had something to say to you, why wouldn’t he say it to your face? Even your friends were keeping the secret on what he talked about to them. You tried to pry the answers out of them, but they all said variations of the same thing. 

“I can’t afford to have another ‘off with your head’”

It was disheartening to say the least, but tonight when you were in the common room attempting to study, Riddle approached you directly. He looked determined, and a little smug, as if he’d solved all the world’s problems. “I’ve devised a plan.” He spoke, and sat down next to you with his phone in his hand. It confused you immensely, considering he rarely used the thing. 

“A…plan…?” You tilted your head and waited for him to continue, and he pulled out a binder the size of three full length textbooks. It had your face turn pale and your jaw dropped, terrified of the thought of having to memorize all of that. Though Riddle saw your look and gave a small chuckle. 

“These are my notes, not yours. But they’ll help.” He opened his phone and showed you the game he’d installed. It was…one of your favorites of all time. You’d play it when you got too stressed over studying, and it gave you mixed feelings. For one, it was relaxing, but the counterargument being that you were wasting your time playing it when you should be studying. 

“Since when did you start playing that? I love that game!” You gasped, and he opened the game. He wasn’t near the level you were at, but you’d been playing for several months. It seemed like he’d been playing for a couple…that or he’s using someone else’s account. You looked at his gamer ID, and bio and concluded this was really Riddle’s account. That or someone is copying him exceptionally. 

“Two days ago.” He spoke, nonchalantly. “I got it for you.” He blushed slightly when he said that, and cleared his throat to continue explaining. “I’ve taken notes on every possibility, enemy, and outcome when it comes to the game, and devised a strategy to get through every story and level in a proficient manner while minimizing time spent.” He looked proud of himself and stared at you until you understood his meanings fully…even though it didn’t work.

“How…is that going to help me study?” You were impressed by his efforts, and you didn’t even know it was possible to have so many materials and weapons in such a short period of time. To say you were confused would be an understatement, and you found yourself mirroring his blush. “You…did all this to help me?” You mumbled, looking at his binder full of supposedly everything you would need in the game. 

He cleared his throat to hide his blush, and tried to look composed as he continued. “It will help because your friends mentioned you enjoy rewards for getting things accomplished. I have three hours of free time within the day, and I expect to see your results and papers on the questions you need help with or need corrected.” He took a deep breath, and spoke with determination in his eyes. “I will be giving you the materials you need based on how you score. And for each time slot around my freetime you work, I will spend my free hour time slot playing your favorite game with you.” 

It blew your mind how much time and effort he had put into his plan…it made you tear up again. No one has ever been that thoughtful for you and your needs like he is right now. You had friends, yes, but Riddle was a busy person. He even said he only had three hours of free time in his day, and he was willing to spend it with you. You sniffled as tears started to fall as he gasped and looked petrified. 

“I-I made you cry again! Is the plan insufficient? I thought it would be enough, I-” He reached out to you to try to comfort you, and you held his hand and smiled through your tears. You effectively stopped his panicked ramble, and spoke with sweetness in your voice despite the shakiness. 

“The plan is perfect. I would have even accepted holding hands as a reward. It’s…really just any time and anything I get to do with you.” You blushed, but closed your eyes from how wide you were smiling at him. The second your eyes closed, you felt his lips on yours. It made you open your eyes in shock to see his eyes closed with a blush that covered his face. The moment seemed to stop, and you both put tenderness into the action, not wanting that moment to end. 

He pulled away, and tried to scowl, but it really looked more like an adorable pout. “I suppose I could do that again for your rewards. But only if you get your work done!” He scoffed, and looked away from you when you looked at him with nothing but enthusiasm and adoration. 

“Okay! I’d…I’d really like that.” 

From then on, you would always study together. He had classes at different times than you did, but all of the free time you both had was spent with each other. Apparently, Riddle had fallen for you the moment you teared up from his lecturing you. He mentioned how you had a form of sensitivity and tenderness he hadn’t seen in a long time. His feelings solidified when he saw you crying, and made a point to never let you get sad enough to cry again. He’d make sure no one hurt you, and even if they did…

He’d be right by your side. 

[thatssonanii]

Chapter Sixteen

A/N: I've written and started this chapter over so many times because it just wasn't flowing right but I finally got. They never have a happy chapter so this is it, minus one part lol. Reblog, Share, Comment and Like! That's the only way my writing gets seen by more and more is if you guys reblog and everything. Help me get my art out! FYI I CHANGED JAYDEN TO BRAYDEN!!

Warning: Cursing, Mentions of Death, implied smut EXCUSE ANY TYPOS, 18+ ONLY MINORS DNI

DO NOT POST MY WORK ANYWHERE ELSE AND/OR CLAIM IT AS YOUR OWN!

Masterlist

Chapter Fifteen

As soon as the guys got Toni’s call, they rushed out of the performance center after clearing it with Shawn. Bronco followed Zilla to the apartment, both parking crooked in front of the complex. Toni met them at the door, a sad look on her face. They huddled in the living room, speaking quietly.

“What’s wrong? You said it was a emergency?” Zilla asked itching to get to his girlfriend.

“The little girl, Nia, she came back in. She was rushed into surgery but she didn’t make it. She cried all the way here,” Toni informed them, grabbing her bag, “She fell asleep not too long ago. I doubt she’ll get any sleep tonight.” The men cursed under their breath. “Yeah so I’ll stop by when I get off work to check on her. If you can, do not leave her by herself.”

He nodded, giving her a quick hug. “I got you. Thank you fa bringin’ her home.”

She waved him off, throwing out a goodbye to him. Bronco and him had a quick, short conversation before he followed his girlfriend out the door. 

Zilla made sure the door was locked and leaned his back against it, taking a few deep breaths to collect himself. Although he was thankful that she wasn’t hurt physically and nobody in her family was hurt, he hated that this is what was happening. The way she would talk about the little girl, how attached she had gotten since the little girl’s first visit and now she had passed away. Zilla knew and understood how big his girlfriend’s heart is so he knew how much this was affecting her.

Seeing her curled up in a ball on their bed broke his heart. He eased onto the bed carefully, trying not to wake her up and pulled her onto his chest. Moriah started to stir against him and lifted her head. Watery eyes met his.

“Zay,” she sobbed.

“I know, beautiful. I know that shit hurtin’ you bad but I got you. I ain’t goin nowhere.” He assured wrapping her in his arms tighter. “Get it out, baby.”

She cried for a few minutes before pulling herself together enough to talk to him. “She was doing so good and then I guess her body couldn’t take it. All he needed was three more minutes. Just three.” Zilla hummed softly, letting her know that he was listening. “It just happened so … freaking fast, Zay. One minute she was okay, the next she was … she was,” Moriah paused unable to bring herself to say the word. 

He kissed her head and her face as she cried softly. “I got you.”

“And when we went to tell her parents, the scream her mama let out … I’ve never heard anything like it, Zay.” She admitted softly. “Her scream is still echoing in my head, I’ll never be able to get that out of my head. And I tried to console her but she just pushed me away. She looked at me like I did it.”

He sighed. “She know you didn’t do it but she was in shock, Fat. Don’t let that bother you, aight? That’s that grief.”

“I just … Nia is … was so full of life. She was energetic, she was happy and now she’s gone.” Moriah spoke sadly. “That was my first and it was a little girl.”

He rocked her gently trying to soothe her. “It sucks, bae and I don’t know what I can do to fix that and make it hurt less. But I got something you can think about that might make you feel better when you get sad.”

“What?”

“Nia not here no more but she up there in them clouds with Pops and Angel. And you know they takin good care fo her.” He smiled seeing her smile a bit. “Angel know all spots for the lil ones and he gon take her to em.”

After another couple hours, Moriah went back to sleep. Zilla waited until he was sure she was in a deep sleep before getting up. Going out to their living room, Zilla flopped on the sofa with his phone to his ear.

“What’s up, nephew?”

“What’s good, Auntie Kami?” He greeted her in a soft tone. “You busy?”

“Nope, I’m on break. What’s up? Why are we whispering?” She asked, laughing.

He chuckled, leaning back against the sofa. “Rye in there sleep, ion wanna wake her up. I need a favor if you don’t mind.”

Kamille took a moment to turn her music down before responding. “You know I don’t mind doing anything for you two, Zay. What’s up?”

“I uh,” he paused to make sure he didn’t hear his girlfriend getting up. “Fat had a ill girl die on her today and she not handlin’ it well. Can you make sure you check on her when you can?”

“My baby,” she cooed. “Of course, Zay. I can take time off and come there if she needs me.”

“Not right now but I’ll let you know. I think ima drive her up to Georgia to see her dad. I think that might help. What you think, Auntie?”

Kamilled laughed a bit. “Of course that would help.”

Anybody who knew Moriah and Hassan knew that their bond was something special to the two of them. Moriah had been a daddy’s girl since the first time she laid eyes on him in the delivery room. Throughout her life whenever she was going through something, needed advice or just wanted to chill Hassan was always there. There was nothing he wouldn’t do for her and there was never anything any more important than his babygirl. 

“Can I ask you something?” Zilla asked quietly.

“Shoot.”

“How is Nadine? I know Fat cut her off but it’s been too quiet. She never really listens to Fat anyway so it’s a little weird to not have her pop up in some way.” He explained further.

The older woman sighed on the other end of the phone. “Nadine is still Nadine. The reason you haven’t heard anything from her is because Hassan is takin the heat off of you two.”

“What that mean?” He asked quickly.

“When you go see him, you ask him. I know he’ll tell you.” She responded quickly. “I gotta go back to work but you know you can call or text me if you need me.”

“Aight, Auntie. Zilla love you.”

“Auntie loves you too.” She laughed.

Getting off the phone with Kamille, Zilla went back to lay with his girlfriend. When he pulled her closer to him this time she didn’t stir or wake up, she just took her place on his chest. As she slept, he made plans in his head for their drive and what he would need to do.  

That night as promised Toni and Bronco came back to the apartment to check on Moriah and brought Javi along. The five of them had dinner together, giving Moriah the support she needed without mentioning the elephant in the room. Afterwards, the boys went out to get dessert for them, leaving the ladies alone for a little while. They were sitting on the floor in front of the sofa drinking wine. 

“Bronco told me that girl sent Zilla videos and tried to act like it was an accident.” Toni rolled her eyes taking a sip. 

Moriah groaned, pulling her glass away from her lips. “Girl, Ima get pissed just thinking about it again cause what the hell was she thinking. She so lucky I like my job and my family out here cause if I didn’t I would’ve beat her ass already.”

“She need her ass beat, if you ask me. What did Zilla say to you about it?”

She rolled her eyes with a grimace. “He said that he would handle it, that a queen shouldn’t come off her throne to address anybody buuut I really don’t care about that. I wanna beat her ass. She keep inching further and further over the line like I won’t kick her frog eyed ass back over it.”

Glancing at the door, Toni slid a little closer to her and spoke softly as if somebody else could hear her. 

“So you know how Dr. Miller had to go out of town for that funeral last week?” She paused, waiting for Moriah to nod. “I was scrolling on instagram and saw he had posted some family pictures and in the midst of looking through them, guess who I saw.”

“Frogger?” She answered immediately.

Toni laughed loudly, covering it with her hand. “Yes, Frogger. I did a little snooping and found out that Frogger is his little cousin. They don’t seem to be that close cause the other pictures he has of her are clearly at family functions.”

 Moriah hummed, internalizing the information. “Oh really? You thinking what I’m thinking?”

“Pump Dr. Miller for info next time we’re at work?”

“That part,” Moriah grinned. “So tomorrow we get em.”

Toni’s smile slightly faltered. “Don’t you think you should take tomorrow and try again on Thursday?”

“I promise I’m fine,” Moriah protested sitting her glass on the coffee table, “I don’t need to take any days off, T. I’ll be there tomorrow morning bright and early.”

Eyeing her friend, Toni rolled around the words she wanted to say to convince her to take the day. When she got back to the hospital, she went ahead and put Moriah off Wednesday and debated if she should do Thursday as well to give her a longer weekend to recuperate. Ultimately, she decided against it going with the one day.

“Just take the day, Rye. Please.”

She shook her head stubbornly. “I don’t need it.”

“About six months into my first year running Lakeland ED, I had a really good group of nurses working under me. But I had one favorite, Alicia.”

Moriah frowned. “You had a favorite before me? I don’t like it but continue.”

Both laugh,Toni pushed her shoulder playfully.

“Anyway, Alicia was pretty much my little second in command at the time like you are now. That girl was something,” she laughed. “Dr. Harris used to try to take her from me all the time. I think about her every day, I miss her smartass.”

“I never saw her on pediatrics with him so I’m assuming she’s at another hospital,” Moriah speculated.

Toni took a sip of her wine before answering. “Nope. One night there was a six car accident on the highway, there were some pretty bad injuries and some minor ones. She handled one of the minor ones with me and a doctor, it wasn’t major but it wasn’t minor. We thought the patient would be okay, they were talking and just needed a minor surgery to set a few things. Next thing we knew the patient had a heart attack.”

Moriah gasped. “Oh no. That’s awful.”

“Definitely. It happened so quick, we couldn’t get em back. The doctor told her to go home, that was her first but she fought him. I told her to go home, me and her fought for about two hours before I just let her have it but kept watch.”

“Soooo?” She asked.

Toni pinched her arm. “Impatient. A couple weeks passed and she was okay but I could tell something was bothering her so I pulled her to talk, she assured me that she was seeing a therapist so I let it go.” She paused to clear her throat and fight back tears. “She missed two shifts without calling in so I went to check on her since I had her spare key. I found her, I thought she was sleeping but she was so cold. There was a letter, she couldn’t get that night out of her head and she wished she’d taken time to deal with it.”

Moriah poked out her lip as tears fell. “I’m sorry, T. That’s … I’m sorry.”

The friends sat in an embrace, crying on each other's shoulders expelling their grief onto one another. Time would heal their wounds but in this moment Toni knew what an extra day would do for Moriah. It would be a lie for Moriah to say that she wasn’t still reliving the day’s events in her head over and over especially when it got too quiet but she didn’t want to be weak. She wanted to be strong like everybody thought she was. 

Pulling away from the hug, Toni used her thumbs to wipe her friend’s tears away. “Rye, please take another day.”

“Okay, okay,” she conceded softly. “I’ll stay out tomorrow.”

“Good because I was gonna have to undo your PTO and that’s too much work.” Toni joked, making them laugh.

Being in Atlanta put a big smile on Moriah’s face the closer they got to Hassan’s house. Zilla let her sleep after her Friday shift to nap before their 3 am drive. He chose that so she would sleep most, if not all of the drive because he wanted to surprise her. She slept until the last thirty minutes, when she got her bearings Zilla saw that sparkle in her eyes again. He laughed seeing her bounce giddily in the passenger seat.

“You ain’t ever been this excited to see me, Fat.” He joked. “What I gotta do to get you that excited for me?”

She laughed, moving her attention from out the window to him. “Be my Daddy.”

“Shid, I’m already that, ain’t it?”

“Shut up,” she laughed harder, “Be Hassan DeBreaux and you knew that.”

He shrugged playfully. “Either way. You like your surprise?”

“I do. Thank you. How’d you know I been missing my Daddy?”

He snorted. “You always miss him, it ain’t a secret. You my Fat but you a Daddy’s girl before that. And I got you always but I figured having both of us would help you more.”

Moriah poked his cheek playfully. “My Zilla being sweet. I love you.”

“Only fa you, Fat. Zilla luh you too.”

When they got to the house, Moriah jumped out of the car and ran to the porch ringing the doorbell repeatedly. Zilla hung back a bit, getting their bags and her purse out of the backseat. As soos as Hassan opened the door, Moriah jumped into his arms excitedly squealing.

“Babygirl,” Hassan laughed as he held onto her, “I didn’t know you were coming.”

“Neither did I. Zay surprised me. I missed you!” She squeezed him tight one more time before he put her down. “Did you miss me?”

“I always miss my babygirl and my son in law.”

“I said me, not hard head, Daddy.”

Zilla stepped on the porch, knocking into her playfully with his duffle bag. “I shoulda let you carry ya own stuff.”

“He’s my Daddy not yours, hard head.”

Hassan chuckled, stepping in before they could argue. He took Moriah’s bag from him. “Alright, alright. You know my babygirl is an only child so sometimes she doesn’t like to share, Zilla.”

“Oh I know she don’t know how to share. She don’t share food, drinks or me.” He laughed, stepping into the house behind her. “So I know she ain’t gon share you.”

Hassan and Zilla sat their bags near the stairs then went to the living room to sit, Moriah pushing her boyfriend out of the way when he tried to sit beside Hassan. Laughing, he went to sit in the love seat.

“Be nice, Rye, Zilla, you can come sit on the other side of me if you want.” 

“Nah, I’m good. She gon beat me up later if I do,” he joked. “You need to talk to her about keepin her hands to herself and about bein mean to me.”

Moriah stared at him. “I’m no mean to you. Take it back.”

“See,” Zilla laughed. “Look at how she lookin at me. When you not lookin, she gon hit me, mane.”

“I’ll just hit you now then.” She sassed, reaching over.

He swatted her hands away laughing. “You can’t reach me anyway with them short ass arms. Stay over there, stubby.”

“Daddy! He called me stubby, get him.” She complained pointing at her boyfriend.

Hassan laughed, pulling his phone out of his pocket. He sat back, responding to a few messages. “Is this what the two of you put Lee through? I’m not playing referee, I will call Lee on you.”

“Dang you gon do us like that?” Zilla asked.

“Right. Just gon get us in trouble like that.” Moriah pouted. “That’s not nice.”

Looking up from his phone, Hassan looked between them chuckling to himself. “This is why I’m not playin referee with you. I say one thing you yall turn on me. Did yall surprise me to argue or did you just come to see me?”

Zilla glanced at his girlfriend then got up from his seat. “Ima take our stuff upstairs and check on Mama. Let yall talk.” He kissed her head before leaving the room, not giving her a chance to pull him back.  

Sitting his phone aside, Hassan gave his daughter his undivided attention, noticing the tears in her eyes. His mind immediately went to the worst but he silently talked himself down. The tick tacking of Moriah’s nails hitting one another filled the momentary silence until Hassan reached out to take one of her hands.

“Hey, whatever is going on you know you can talk to me about it, kid.” He softly reassured her.

“You remember that surgery I helped out with?”

“The little girl, of course I remember. What about it?”

She took a deep breath to try to calm herself down. “She came back in a few days ago with complications. Did another surgery to fix it but,” she paused to wipe her face and take more breaths. “She didn’t make it, Daddy.”

With no hesitation, Hassan pulled his daughter closer and into his arms. He rocked her, letting her cry on his chest. The thought obviously crossed his mind that this would happen eventually and he wished there was some way he could prevent it from happening but he couldn’t. But he  would always be there to catch her. 

He kissed the top of her head and rubbed her back soothingly. “Daddy is sorry that you have to deal with this. You know you did everything that you could to help her and the rest of it was in the Lord’s hands. He needed another angel. Just know she isn’t in any pain anymore.”

She nodded, finding solace in his arms. “She was so little. I just hate that we couldn’t save her.”

“The Lord saved her. He got her, kid. And think about this,” he paused to lean her back so she was looking at him. “She’s up there keeping Angel company. I’m sure he’s a little ladies man.”

Moriah laughed, wiping her face. “He better not be. He better be a good little angel.”

“Mmm, I know my grandson handsome like me so I dunno.” He joked. 

She blew playfully sitting up a bit more. “Daddy, you just like Zay. He said the same thing. How’s my stepmom?”

“Stepmom?” He chuckled. “Tamara is alright. She asks about you all the time.”

“Give her my number, I don’t mind. Am I gonna get to see her while I’m here?”

He nodded, taking his phone back out. “I’ll send it to her. Yeah, I’m actually supposed to meet her kids tomorrow. You know she met your grandparents and auntie and everybody.”

“Yeah, you know Grandma called and told me about it. Sooo,” she drug out smiling. “Can me and Zay go too?”

“You don’t have to ask, you’re welcome anywhere I am.” He sat back against the sofa, stroking his beard. “Have you spoken to your mama?”

“Nope,” she answered quickly. “And I’m okay with that.”

“If it’s making you happier and causing less problems between you and Zay then I support it. I know dealin with her ain’t easy.”

“It’s not and with all the problems she’s already caused, I don’t need anymore, Daddy. I don’t want anymore.”

That evening after dinner, Hassan stepped out for a little while to visit Tamara leaving Moriah and Zilla alone. The couple made a pallet on the floor in the den, eating their dessert and watching a movie. 

“You got the same ice cream that I got. Stay out my bowl, girl.” 

Moriah reached her spoon back in his bowl. “But yours tastes better.”

“How?”

She shrugged, eating the ice cream she took from him. “Cause it’s yours. I like anything you have.”

He leaned over to kiss her, when he pulled away he noticed her spoon in his bowl. “Fat,” he laughed, “Mane, just take it. Here.”

Giggling, she took his bowl and gave him hers. He looked at her bowl then back up at her and shook his head. “You lucky I love yo ass,”

“Very lucky.” She winked. “Sometimes I think about what life would be like if you didn’t go to prison.” He nodded for her to go on. “And sometimes I think that we would have Angel and be happy still but sometimes … I think about it and I don’t know if we would be this happy.”

“I’m right there witchu. Sometimes I wanna think that we’d be happy, me, you and Angel and maybe another one but then … then I don’t think so. I’m like aight it’s two this would go.”

“Which are what?”

“One way is that I kept at that bad shit and you wouldn’t stick around. I know you woulda got tired of the constant trouble especially knowin we was havin a son. You wouldn’t want him to have me in and out his life with that trouble. It would drive us apart.” He shrugged quickly eating another spoon of ice cream. “The other way is that you would stay even though you know you should leave and you would accept all the shit I did and give up on what you wanted in life because you gotta raise Angel and step up while I was in and out. Angel would see that and think it was okay and wanna be just like me. And even though we’d still be together, you wouldn’t be you anymore. Either option, I lose you, you lose me and we lose each other.”

Serious conversations for Moriah and Zilla didn’t happen as often as other couples but when they did, each of them spoke openly and honestly. Moriah liked that he had grown to a point where he could put his thoughts into words without being flustered or embarrassed. Coming from where they came from as children, both of them had made much progress in sharing their feelings and thoughts.

“I … yeah, you’re right. It sounds kinda fucked up but you getting locked and us losing Angel was probably the best thing for us.” She admitted softly, sitting her bowl aside. 

He thought it over for a moment before nodding. “Yeah, Fat, I think so too. I know I wouldn’t have changed if I was in and out, all that time gave me time to get myself together. I hate that I had to learn that away from everybody I loved but it needed to happen. You also needed me away so you could go to school and all that. You wouldn’t have went off to school if I was out.”

She chuckled a bit. “I would’ve made you come with me. Daddy would’ve gotten me an apartment or something so you could stay.”

He laughed loudly at that. “Ya spoiled ass. But that’s exactly why I ain’t need to be around. If I woulda went witchu your ass wouldnt’a graduated, Fat. I woulda known that from jump but I still woulda went if you asked me too.” He admitted lookin gin her eyes. “When you wanted to run away when we was like 12, I was packed and ready.”

“I remember that. But why would you do all that? Especially knowing it wouldn’t be a good ending.” She asked, tucking her legs under her.

He ate his last bit of ice cream so he could sit the bowl aside and give the rest of the small part of his attention that she didn’t have to her. “Fat, Ion think you understand how much I loved you back then or how much I love you now,” he admitted caressing her cheek. “I’a do anything you asked me to do if it made you happy or made you feel better. Nobody else, just you.”

Biting her lip, she tilted her head eyeing him with love in her eyes. Obviously she knows that Zilla loves her and she knows how much he loves her but hearing it from him warmed her heart. It gave her butterflies every single time.

“Kinda dangerous. No?” She asked teasingly to which he shrugged. “And what would Dr. Barnes say about that?”

“Don’t know but I’a ask em for you next session.” He laughed, leaning to kiss her cheek, “You talked to your mom?”

Moriah stared at him, “Hell no. You know I have clear boundaries and I’m no contact with her.”

“Just askin, Fat. You miss her?”

“I mean yeah, she’s my mom. It feels like I’m grieving for her but she’s still alive.” She huffed. “Are you mad at me for missing her?”

He shook his head. “Nah, Zilla wouldn’t be mad about that. The only thing that would make me mad is if you let her back in our lives without talking to me. I don’t want her back but everybody deserves a chance if they do the work.”

Moriah smiled wide at him, “Ooooh that therapy is working, Isayah! Listen to you. I’m so proud of you.”

He laughed, pushing her hands away from his face. “Chill. Dr. Barnes gon be happy to hear that though.”

“We gotta get him a gift or something,” she suggested excitedly.

Zilla stared at his girlfriend, happy to see her back to herself. Even if it’s for just this moment. No matter what happened, Moriah always had a giving heart. Zilla both loved and hated it because he didn’t want anyone to try to take advantage of her heart. But if it happened, he would take care of it.

“So uh at my last session, Dr. Barne gave me a list of like 4 fertility specialists we can pick from to go see. Or we can see em all. I mean if you want to, it’s all up to you.” He watched her shoulders slump slightly at the mention and a slight frown take over her smile. “Fat, we don’t gotta talk about it. My bad for bringin it up.” 

She shook her head quickly. “No, no, I’m okay. It just caught me off guard. We can do that, Zay.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah,” she whispered, “I’m just a little scared that they can’t help us and if they can’t help us, I don’t wanna disappoint you and your family.”

It was his turn to frown. “Baby, hell nah. You ain’t gon disappoint me or our family. Don’t think none of that negative shit. Whatever happens we gon keep tryin till you wanna stop. Aight?” He waited for her to nod before he cracked a smile. “Somethin else I gotta tell you that me and Dr. Barnes talked about.”

“You know you can tell me whatever, babe.”

“I know it’s just … ion want you to take the shit the wrong way, aight? It ain’t nothing you did.” At his words, she frowned but told him to go on. “You know how you mentioned before that since we got rid of the condoms that we don’t have sex as much as we used to?”

“Yeah. What about it?”

“I know I told you its cause I’m tired with everything starting to pick up for me but that ain’t it. And it ain’t that ion want to cause I do,” he admitted looking into her eyes, “I can’t.”

“What do you mean you can’t?”

He huffed, trying to get his words together without upsetting her. “Whenever we’re goin to or I think about it my shit just don’t work. It won’t get up.”

“So you’re turned off by me now?” She asked scooting away from him, slapping his hand away from her when he tried to pull her back. “Don’t touch me, Zay and answer me.”

“I ain’t turned off by you, Fat. I still think you beautiful, pretty, fine as fuck all that but when I think about not needing a condom and what your mama did, I get mad and it ruins everything. It’s not you, it’s what she did, Fat.”

On the verge of tears, Moriah thought back to all the moments where they were going to have sex or she planned on them having sex and he was either tired, always sleeping or came home after she was already sleeping. But then she thought of those moments where they would randomly have sex and that gave her pause.

“So what about in your backseat, on the sofa those few times and all the others?”

“I can explain that, Fat. You was catching me off guard getting mad as shit about stuff and my brian overlooked the other shit,” he spit out quickly. “Ima tell you like I told Dr. Barnes, that shit sound toxic as hell but you bein mad did some shit to me. Ion know. It was enough for my mind to blank that other shit out.”

She scoffed, folding her arms across her chest. “So me being mad turned you on but just me being me doesn’t?”

“Nah, nah, nah. That ain’t what I said. I’m tellin you that them times I wasn’t expectin you to get that mad so I didn’t have time to think about shit else but fuckin you. Them other times I knew what to expect so it gave my mind time to think about way too much. It ain’t you, Fat. I swear it ain’t. If it was you, I wouldn’t get up at all no matter what.”

“So you tellin me if I grabbed your dick right now, it won’t get hard?” She asked, squinting at him.

Feeling the anger radiated off of her, Zilla knew what would happen as soon as she touched him. Knowing that she was upset, what Nadine had done was far from his mind at the moment. If he was being honest with himself, she probably ain’t have to touch him for the shit to happen.

“If you grabbed my dick right now, it would get hard cause you pissed and I can see that shit. My brain short circuited like a muhfucker, Fat, knowing you pissed.” He admitted shamelessly. Seeing her eyes move from his face to his lap, told him she noticed it. “See? I told you, bae. I’m attracted you, the blood just don’t leave my head fast enough when you ain’t pissed.”

Blowing loudly, Moriah moved her stare to the ceiling for a moment then back to him. “Are you serious right now? I’ve been pissed all those other times and I’m pissed right now and all you can think about is fucking me? Seriously?”

He stared at her trying to concentrate. He heard every word she said but he couldn’t formulate a response. Feeling her push his shoulder, he shook his head trying once again to focus.

“Yeah, bae?”

“I’m talking to you! Stop thinkin about whatever you’re thinkin about and focus. Cause there is no way I’m fuckin you right now.” She fussed poking him in his chest. “You got some nerve!”

“Baby, shit,” he complained softly as he pulled her into his lap grinding himself into her, “I promise I hear you but I got just enough blood in this head up here to convince you to change your mind.” Staring at her for a moment, Zilla licked his lips noticing the flare in her nostrils and the fire in her eyes. He kissed her lips a few times then moved to her neck, still grinding against her.

“Zay … Zay,” she mumbled out, trying to push at his shoulders, “I’m still pissed at you and I wanna talk about this. I wanna talk about this right now.”

He bit down on her neck then pulled away to look at her. “And you know how to multi-task, Fat. So ride this dick and tell Zilla all your thoughts. Aight, beautiful?”

She moaned softly. “But I dunno when my daddy is gonna be back. I don’t want him to catch us.”

He kissed her lips again before standing with her in his arms. “Ain’t no problem, Fat. Zilla got you.”

A few hours later, Zilla had the overwhelming urge to pee so he carefully slid Moriah off his chest and onto his pillow then out of the bed. After taking care of his business, he pulled on his briefs and shirts to go downstairs for something to drink. Getting downstairs he found Hassan sitting at the island on his laptop with his back to him, bobbing his head to the music coming out of it.

“Rye was right, you do slide your feet when you walk.” Hassan spoke without turning around, making Zilla laugh a bit.

“Can’t help it,” he shrugged, grabbing a water from the fridge. “What you doin up this late?”

Hassan looked at the time on his screen. “It’s only 1am. I’m usually up this late when I’m workin on something. Surprised she let you get up, sleeping next to her is like sleeping with velcro.”

He took a long swig then laughed. “I learned how to maneuver her so now she don’t notice when I get up.”

“Smart man,” Hassan smiled and offered Zilla a seat next to him. “You and her didn’t fight anymore after I left, did you?”

“Nah, no fightin. We just talked. Why you ask?”

“I kept getting notifications about movement from my camera in the den. Since it wasn't a fight,” He slid his phone over, “Go to the blink app and delete whatever videos. I don’t wanna know. My phone password is Rye birthday.”

Zilla laughed doing what he was asked. “It wasn’t nothin bad, not all of it. We really was just talkin, you prolly don’t wanna hear the last part though.”

Hassan glanced at him with a smile on his face. “Didn’t I say I don’t wanna know? Just delete, son.”

“My bad, my bad.” He laughed as he deleted videos. “This is goin way better with you than it did that night Nadine was in the kitchen when I went downstairs.”

“Oh yeah? What happened?” He asked going back to his work on his computer.

Zilla finished deleting the last few videos before answering. “She was cryin, said she had just had a argument with you. She asked if me and Fat argued and if I put my hands on her, tryna like say that you did that to her. I know she was lyin.”

“She was but go on.”

“And then she offered to pay me to break up with Fat. Told me to name my price.”

“I wanna say that I’m surprised but I ain’t. I can assure you that this is not gonna go anything like that.”

“Shit, I know,” he admitted bringing his bottle back to his lips, “I was talkin to Auntie Kami the other day and asked her about Nadine, ya know about her being quiet and shit. She said you had takin the heat off us and to ask you what that meant.”

Hassan asked him to give him a few minutes to finish what he was working on. The younger man sat quietly watching the older man finish whatever design on his computer while he waited. When it was done Hassan saved his project then turned his attention to his guest.

“A little bit after the whole fall out I sent Gabi to see Nadine to check her temperature a little. And let me tell you, son, that shit was high as hell on yall so she did what I asked her to do.” He explained. “She informed Nadine about my relationship with Tam so the temp she had with you two turned to me and Tam. Nadine was hot, you hear me?”

“Damn. That’s all it took?”

“Nah, there was more. She called me like I knew she would to confirm what Gabi said and I did, that set her off even more. And after that it ended up working out that Tamara wanted to meet Didi.” He paused to make sure Zilla was following him. “We went to meet her. She wasn’t happy but it ended with her thinking she has the upper hand and that’s what I want her to think. As long as she’s focused on me and what I’m doing, you and Rye don’t have anything to worry about.”

Zilla whistled lowly. “Damn. That … you sure you gon be able to handle the shit she do?”

Hassan waved him off. “I’ve known Didi for well over 20 years, I know all of her moves before she make them. She think in charge of all of this but I’m just stringing her along.”

“I appreciate you doin that for us. I’m also sorry that you have to deal with her. I know that ain’t easy.”

“Difference between me and Rye is I ain’t Didi kid. I don’t feel obligated to do anything for her or listen to her.” He shrugged. “I talk to her enough to keep her attention over here and that’s it.”

The men moved their talk to the living room. They went back and forth trading work stories for another half an hour. 

“When you found out Fat was pregnant were you mad?”

“A little but me and Lee already saw it coming. We noticed the time you and Rye spent together and how it went from being friends to something else.” Hassan replied. “You think we didn’t know about the locked doors and what you two were doing on the sofa?”

Zilla rubbed down his face, laughing. “In our defense, we wasn’t doin nothin most of that time. My mama said the same thing though.I’m sorry about all that though.”

“Sorry about what?”

“Getting Fat pregnant that young. We shouldn’t have been doin none’a that.”

Hassan shrugged. “You don’t need to apologize about that, Zilla. Yall were young but you were still human. Like I said, we knew it was coming and mistakes happen.”

“It’s so crazy to me how you so cool about shit and so easy to talk to yet Nadine in … that.”

He shrugged. “She wasn’t always the way she is now. Or I suppose it was always in her but she made an effort to put her best foot forward all those years.Back to happier things, what’s next for you and Rye?”

“I been lookin for a realtor. Wanna find some houses to look at. Nothin big but like a townhouse, we outgrew that apartment already, mane.”

“Tam is a realtor, if she can’t help you then I’m sure she can find you someone who can.”

“Yeah definitely, I suck at tryna find one. Fat think you gon get married again.” He shared softly. “She mention it a lot.”

“My sister thinks so too. It’s still a little early to go ring shopping but I know I’d like to have her around for a long while.”

“I hear that. I get it.”

“But not too early for you to go ring shopping,” Hassan smiled.

Zilla laughed. “Every time we talk you bring that up. You dyin for us to get married?”

“Just wondering why you putin off the inevitable is all. Everybody know it’s comin. You scared?”

“I mean nah … I wouldn’t call it scared.”

“Nervous then?”

Zilla nodded, rubbing his hand over the top of his head. “Yeah that sound about right.”

“Nervous that gettin married is gonna change things or nervous that you’re gonna mess it up?”

“Both but more of the second one.” He admitted.

“Marriage is gonna change things but for the better, no need to be nervous about that. It is a big commitment but the two of you can handle it. Look at how well you’re doin now?” Hassan gave him an encouraging pat on the back. “And you not gon mess it up. Neither of you is perfect but as long as you try and your honest, you have nothing to worry about. You’re a good guy, don’t let anybody tell you any different. You hear me?” Zilla nodded letting the words digest. “Good. Go on and get you some sleep. We can talk more tomorrow.”

“Aight, Po…Hassan. Good night.”

Hassan ignored the slip, letting him continue on. He knew they would talk about it soon enough. Hassan got up to shut everything down before following Zilla upstairs to turn in for the night as well. 

Finally time for the meet up, Hassan drove them to Tamara’s house. He noticed the two extra cars in her driveway, taking note that her kids were already there. He shot her a quick text after parking. 

“No need to be anything other than yourselves, kids. She knows all about you two and I’m sure she’s told her kids about you. They’re around your ages so yall should get along.” He told them making sure he had all of his things before he got out. “But … no fighting. Keep your hands to yourself if they’re not nice touches and no arguing. Got it, kiddos?”

“That’s him always starting with me, Daddy. Tell him.” Moriah pouted in the backseat.

Zilla sucked his teeth. “Sound like you the one startin. All you had to do was say aight like I was bout to.”

Hassan held his hand up silencing them. “Cut it or I will personally fly Lee out here to get yall together. We clear?”

“Crystal,” the couple mumbled.

Moriah and Zilla followed Hassan to the porch, quietly pushing each other and arguing thinking he couldn’t hear them but he just ignored them laughing to himself. While he waited for Tamara to answer the door, he turned around to give the two of them one last look. When she opened the door, she had a big smile on her face and pulled Hassan into a tight hug, kissing his cheek until they heard kissing sounds coming from behind Hassan. They pulled away laughing.

“You remember my daughter, Moriah and this is my son in law, Isayah but we all call him Zilla. Zilla, this is my lady, Tamara.”

Moriah pushed Zilla out of the way to hug her. “Me first. Hey, Tamara. You look pretty and this house is nice.”

Tamara laughed and thanked her. “You look pretty too. Nice to meet you, Zilla. I’ve heard a lot about you.”

Zilla thumped Moriah’s ear to get her out of the way and hugged Tamara. “Nice to meet you too, ma’am. Ignore fat head over there.”

Hassan stopped Moriah before she could hit him and made them follow Tamara inside the house. She led them to her den where her kids were doing some bickering of their own. Discreetly she tried to stop them until she realized they weren’t listening so she popped both of them making them hiss.

“Ow, aye, what you hit me for? She started it, Ma.”

Tamara stared at her son. “Don’t care, I finished it. Our guests are here.”

“So act right, ugly.” 

Tamara snapped her fingers stopping them once more. “Hassan, these are my kids Brayden and Sade. Sade and Brayden, this is my boyfriend, Hassan. And that’s his daughter, Moriah and his son in law, Zilla.”

The kids waved at each other.

Hassan smiled. “Nice to meet you two. Your mom talks about you all the time.”

“This ya man, Mama? I like em cause yo been nicer since you been datin him. What’s up, man?” Brayden shrugged his mom’s glare off. Ain’t she been nicer, Sade?”

Sade had zoned out for a moment staring at Moriah and Moriah stared back. “What? Oh yeah, she has.”

“Anyway, San, come help me get the snacks form the kitchen and leave these four to talk junk about us.” Tamara suggested.

He nodded. “Lead the way. Yall have a seat and get comfortable.”

After sitting down, Zilla noticed Moriah and Sade kept staring at each other and he made eye contact with Brayden who also noticed. Both tried unsuccessfully to get their attention, left feeling confused. 

“You look real familiar,” Moriah admitted. 

Sade nodded. “Yeah, you do too. I swear I know you from somewhere. Uuuh you went to school in Dekalb county?”

Moriah shook her head. “Nope. You ever lived in Houston?”

“Nah, never lived there.”

“You were on a dance team when you were younger? One that traveled.”

“Nope. Never had the time.”

Not being able to figure out where they knew each other from was frustrating each o fhte young women and confusing the men. 

Brayden cut in after thinking for a second. “You was in Houston for a minute until they caught ya lil ass. You probably don’t remember cause Mama whooped ya ass when you got back here.”

Sade jumped at him. “Shut up. I do remember that but I don’t think that’s it.”

“You look like this girl I met, Dreka, I met when I went to juvie in Houston.”

Zilla sucked his teeth. “You sayin that like you did hard time in there. You was in there one day and Hassan picked you up the next morning.” 

“Either way I went. Shut up.”

“Wait .. wait,” Sade called out snapping her fingers, “You are who I thought you were, girl! I used to go by middle name back then, it’s Shaundreka. You was the girl I had helped that night!”

“Yes, that was you that helped me! Oh my God! I was waiting on you to call me when you got out,” Moriah laughed. “Zay made fun of me cause I was sad.”

“Oh she ain’t call cause my mama ain’t let her ass do shit when she got back to Georgia. She was lucky my mama let her take her ass to school.” Brayden laughed. “Thought she was bad till my mama put that belt to her ass.”

Sade scrunched her face at him and rolled her eyes. “Oh shut up before I tell her that it was you that smashed her window and not that neighbor boy.”

“Awwe ya lil juvie friend back, Fat. That’s cute.” Zilla taunted laughing.

“Forget them. Let’s go in the other room and talk away from them. They just jealous.” Sade suggested getting up from the sofa. “And don’t try to follow us either, uglies.”

Brayden laughed out loud. “What yall gon be some runaways again? This time don’t tell nobody where you goin so Mama don’t catch you again!”

“Is that the one you got put in juvie for?” Sade asked as they were leaving the room.

“Mmhm, that’s him. Mistakes were made,”’ she said loud enough for him to hear.

“Love you too, Fat!” He yelled out still laughing.

In the kitchen, Hassan and Tamara were laughing softly with one another happy that all four were getting along. They weren’t exactly worried about it but they knew there was a slim chance that they could bump heads.

[michaelsgavey]

Who Needs Cupid? - Billy Washington X Fem!Reader

Summary: Today is the celebration of romance and Billy decides to use this day as an opportunity to ask his neighbor he had been crushing on out on a date. However.. things do not go as planned.

Warnings: Other than the fact it’s using she/her pronouns, it’s nothing really.

Type of story: Fluff

Author’s note: Woohoo! First fic here! I was gonna post this on Valentine’s day but i couldn’t wait any longer. This is my first piece of fanfiction and this is my first time writing for Billy so bare with me please. Plus my writing’s a lil’ rusty so i really hope y’all like it 😭 There is rare use of y/n but it IS a x reader fic with she/her pronouns. But anyways.. let’s see the story! I hope you all like it 🫶

｡ﾟ•┈꒰ა ♡ ��꒱┈• ｡ﾟ

And there she was.

Here she was outside tending her plants. She always took real care of her outdoor plants.

Billy had come outside to get his mail and he could not help but to take a glance at his neighbor. As silly as it sounded , he may have developed a liking towards her. But how could anyone not? She was kind , sweet , and she is caring. She even brings pastries she cooked around the neighborhood. She was a kind soul indeed.

Her kindness is what drew Billy to her. The two have interacted from time to time but he hasn’t mustered up the courage to ask her out on a date. He was confident that he could do it but at the same time he was scared. What would happen if he did ask her out? Would she reject him? Did she even have a significant other? Those kinds of questions made him slightly anxious.

Was he even her type? Was he even anyone’s type? She was everything. Billy was.. well he’s just Billy. He didn’t see himself as a perfect man. God he was a wreck. He was about to go inside when she waved at him. Billy’s heart fluttered and he waved back with a smile. She went back inside and he sighed before he did the same.

Later in the evening, Billy was at a restaurant having dinner with his sister. He decided to open up to her about his feelings towards his neighbor.

“I don’t understand these feelings, Lana. I want to ask her out on a date and develop a relationship. But I just..” Billy trailed off and took a deep sigh before he looked at her. “I don’t know how to do it. I don’t think I have the courage to ask her out.” He admitted.

“Well-“ Lana was about to speak before Billy cut her off. “I need to have the courage somehow! I mean.. She’s perfect! She truly is a dream girl. I mean.. she’s kind and wonderful and beautiful.. I could go on and on about her.” He said. Lana just sighed.

“Well.. It does not hurt to try. What is there to be afraid of?” She questioned. Billy looked at her and looked down. “What is to be afraid of? Rejection.” He responded. “Again. It doesn't hurt to try it out.” She responded.

He looked at his sister. Maybe she does have a point. It would not be the end of the world if he had tried… right? “Fine. I’ll try to ask her out. Besides, how am I gonna do that?” He questioned. When he asked that , Lana looked like she was thinking.

Billy looked out the window and saw a booth that was selling Valentine’s Day items. It was full of teddy bears, flowers and many more essential Valentine’s Day items. Then he had an idea.

“I could ask her out on Valentine’s day! That’s perfect isn’t it?” Billy said with a proud smile. Lana nods while sharing a smile. Billy beamed and looked confident. “I’ll give her the best Valentine’s gift. Surely it’ll make her want to go out with me.” He said.

It was a good idea. What could go wrong?

__________

It was now the 13th day of the month. A day before Valentine’s Day. Billy was sitting on his couch thinking of ways on how to impress this woman. So far.. he got nothing. What could he give her? What could he do to get her to be in awe of him?

A piece of jewelry? They have been advertising them constantly. No. Too pricey. What about a walk at the park? Would that work? Maybe not. What about a poem? He’s not good at poetry. He could never do that.

Billy sighed and rubbed his face. Why was this so hard? What could he give her for Valentine’s Day? Maybe he should give up.. Wait No. He can’t. He was confident that he would not give up! He has to go for it. He has to shoot his shot.

Billy had stood up and decided to go out. He would go out and find something that he could not only afford , but something that would wow her. He was confident that it would work.

He grabbed his wallet and put it in his pocket before he stepped out of his home. He decided to walk to the local supermarket to see what they’d have to offer. Surely they’d have something good in mind. Right?

__________

After a slightly long walk , Billy entered the supermarket, looked around and tried to find the area that sold Valentine’s day items. He walked around and looked before he saw it. But to his surprise, it was slightly crowded.

Many people were looking around to see what the area had to offer. From lovers looking for something for their significant others to mothers looking for Valentine’s cards for their kid’s Valentine’s party at school , it looked slightly chaotic. Well.. In his eyes it did.

But was he going to back down? No. Billy entered the area and explored the area. Hm.. what could he get her? It was a lot to choose.

Billy strolled through the area, contemplating the perfect Valentine's Day gift for his her. As he explored the shelves, the possibilities seemed endless. From fragrant bouquets to exquisite chocolates, the choices were overwhelming. Yet, Billy was determined to find something uniquely special for her. As he strolled past the section, an idea sparked in his mind.

Fresh flowers! The floral arrangements caught his eye, and he imagined presenting a beautiful bouquet to his neighbor. Billy carefully selected a mix of her favorite flowers, envisioning the delight on her face when he handed them to her tomorrow. “Perfect.” He said with a proud smile.

With flowers in hand, he ventured further into the store, determined to complement the bouquet with something more personal. As he perused the aisles, the confectionery section beckoned him, and he decided on a box of assorted chocolates to add a sweet touch to the gift.

Billy's thoughtful quest didn't end there. He wanted this gesture to be memorable, so he meandered through the store, searching for a charming card to express his feelings. After scanning numerous options, he found one that captured the sentiment he couldn't put into words.

With the bouquet of flowers, a box of chocolates, and a heartfelt card, Billy approached the checkout counter, excitement and nervousness intertwining within him. The cashier smiled knowingly, recognizing the classic signs of someone gearing up for a special occasion.

As Billy left the supermarket, he couldn't help but feel a mix of anticipation and optimism. Valentine's Day was just tomorrow, and he was armed with a thoughtful ensemble that he hoped would win over her heart. He was confident with that.

__________

That night, as Billy arranged the flowers, placed the chocolates in a neat package, and signed the heartfelt card, a wave of nervous energy washed over him. He paced around his living room, talking to himself in hushed tones.

“Come on, Billy, you can do this," he whispered, trying to convince himself. He rehearsed what he would say, stumbling over words and then finding the right ones. The weight of uncertainty hung in the air as he debated the pros and cons of confessing his feelings.

“But what if she doesn't feel the same way?" he questioned, glancing at the bouquet as if seeking answers. The possibility of rejection gnawed at him, but a spark of determination flickered in his eyes.

He continued his one-man pep talk, encouraging himself to take the leap. "You've got a great plan, a thoughtful gift. She'll appreciate the effort, right?" Billy mumbled, almost convincing himself that everything would unfold perfectly.

As he prepared for the following day, the internal dialogue persisted. “Is it worth the risk?" Doubts and insecurities clouded his thoughts, but the desire for something more pushed him forward.

With a deep breath, Billy reflected on the moments they shared, the smiles they exchanged, and the connection that had grown between them. The idea of spending Valentine's Day alone, wondering "what if," outweighed the fear of rejection.

With a newfound determination, Billy set the stage for the next day, hopeful that his gesture would be met with warmth.

__________

Valentine's Day arrived, and Billy meticulously groomed himself, selecting an outfit that radiated a charming blend of casual and sophisticated. He spared no effort in ensuring he looked his best, as he hoped to make a lasting impression on his neighbor. He even had a clean shaven face.

As he stood before the mirror, smoothing down his shirt, a surge of confidence filled him. "You've got this," he told himself, determined to approach the day with positivity.

As he made his way to his neighbor's door with the carefully arranged gifts, a mix of excitement and nervousness coursed through him. The bouquet of flowers and box of chocolates were held tightly in his hands, his heart pounding with anticipation.

He really got this. He is about to do it!

However, just as fate often teases with irony, a moment of clumsiness struck. As he approached her door, he tripped over an uneven sidewalk, sending the bouquet of flowers, the box of chocolates, and the heartfelt card soaring through the air. Panic and disappointment washed over him as he watched his carefully arranged gifts scatter in all directions.

“No!” He exclaimed , looking at the gifts he had gotten on the floor. The box of chocolates was open and out , the flowers looked wrinkled , and the card landed on mud.

Billy's heart sank, and for a moment, he contemplated abandoning the mission altogether. He muttered discouraging words to himself, convinced that this mishap had sealed his fate. "I knew I couldn't do this. It was a silly idea," he murmured, berating himself for what seemed like a comedy of errors. “God.. I’m such an fuck up.”

As Billy remained on the sidewalk, contemplating the shattered pieces of his planned surprise, he heard the door behind him creak open. To his surprise, Y/N, with a curious and concerned expression, rushed outside, witnessing the aftermath of the unexpected mishap.

“Billy, are you okay?" she asked, genuine worry etched on her face as she took in the scene. She noticed the scattered flowers, the fallen chocolates, and the way he looked disheartened.

Feeling a mix of embarrassment and disappointment, Billy stammered, "I, uh, I..”

Embarrassment flushed across Billy's face as he stammered, "I... I wanted to give you something for Valentine's Day." He admitted, feeling vulnerable and exposed. The weight of the moment hung in the air as he awaited her reaction.

To his surprise, instead of disappointment, a warm smile spread across her face. "Really? For me?" she exclaimed, genuine delight replacing any concern she initially had. Her eyes twinkled with a mix of surprise and joy.

Billy nodded, feeling a sense of relief wash over him. "Yeah, I wanted it to be perfect, but..." he gestured helplessly toward the scattered gifts, now gathered in his hands. “But, well, it's all ruined now."

To his surprise, she smiled, shaking her head. "Ruined? Not at all, Billy. It's the thought that counts, and this unexpected twist just makes it even more special. I appreciate the effort you put into this."

Perplexed by her response, Billy couldn't help but question, "But, I mean, everything went wrong. I tripped, gifts flew everywhere. How is that not ruined?"

She chuckled warmly, meeting his eyes with understanding. "Billy, it's not about everything going perfectly. It's about the sincerity and effort behind the gesture. The fact that you went through all this trouble to make Valentine's Day special for me means more than anything."

As she spoke, Billy found himself reconsidering his perspective. Perhaps, he realized, the mishap hadn't ruined everything; it had added an element of authenticity to his expression of feelings. His neighbor's reassurance made him appreciate the beauty in the unpredictability of life.

With a smile, she added, "Besides, it's the story we create together that matters. This unexpected twist just makes our Valentine's Day more memorable, don't you think?"

Billy couldn't help but nod in agreement, grateful for the wisdom and understanding his neighbor brought to the situation.

Encouraged by her understanding, Billy took a deep breath, reminding himself of his original intention. The scattered gifts, though imperfect, became a symbol of their shared moment, and he couldn't let this opportunity slip away.

Summoning his courage, he looked into Y/N's eyes and said, "You know, there's something else I wanted to ask you. I was wondering.. if you'd like to go out on a date with me sometime. You don’t have to say yes but..”

His words hung in the air, and a nervous energy surrounded them. The unexpected mishap had paved the way for a more genuine connection, and as he awaited her response, a mix of anticipation and vulnerability played on his face.

Y/N, who had been through the rollercoaster of surprises that evening, grinned warmly. "I would love that, Billy. It sounds like a perfect idea."

Billy's heart swelled with happiness as he processed his neighbor's positive response. A smile graced his face, and he couldn't help but feel a surge of excitement about the prospect of a date.

“I'm looking forward to it. Maybe.. Saturday at six pm?” he replied, a mix of relief and joy in his voice. She nodded and smiled. “Sure. I would love that.” She responded. He can’t believe it. His plan went great! Well.. it wasn’t how he expected but it went great! He was getting the woman of his dreams.

Then with a playful twinkle in her eye, she suggested, "Why don't you come inside for a bit? I've actually made some cake, and I think we could use a sweet ending to this eventful day."

Billy's spirits lifted even more at the invitation. "Sure, I'd love that," he said, appreciating the warmth and comfort she offered.

As they stepped into her cozy home, the scent of freshly baked cake enveloped them. They continued to talk, sharing stories and laughter, turning what could have been a discouraging day into one filled with unexpected connections and delightful surprises.

Feeling a genuine connection blossoming, Billy couldn't help but appreciate the unpredictability of life. In the warmth of her company, he found not only a wonderful Valentine's Day but also the promise of something more meaningful.

Days turned into weeks, and their days together were filled with smiles, shared interests, and the joy of discovering each other. Eventually, what started as a nervous attempt to express his feelings blossomed into a beautiful romance.

In the end, Billy's Valentine's Day plan, despite its bumps and surprises, led him to a happy ending. A love story that unfolded unexpectedly but perfectly, just like the imperfectly perfect bouquet of flowers.

[siriuslysatorusimping]

Fight Me? (Gojo Satoru one-shot)

This is based on the following:

Nurse!Gojo falling for a grumpy lil Rinko in this short and sweet AU one-shot 💕

It is fluffy and cute and I really enjoyed writing this silly lil thing 🥹

Also, happy early birthday Gojo Satoru!

I'll try to get the amusement park Another Level Extra done and posted by tomorrow 😊

Fight Me?

“Good morning, Kurisaki-chan,” the nurse’s annoyingly chipper voice sang as he entered the room. “Wakey, wakey!”

“Fight me,” Rinko mumbled, trying to shield her eyes with a pillow when he flipped the lights on.

“Maybe later, Kurisaki-chan,” Gojo replied cheerfully, prying the pillow from her face. His stunning blue eyes smiled down at her from behind the white hair that fell in a messy mop across his forehead. “Can’t if you suffocate yourself while I’m trying to take your vitals, though.”

He wrapped the blood pressure cuff around her arm and began pumping air into it, his eyes staying firmly on the gauge as it inflated.

“Did you sleep okay?” he asked as he jotted the numbers down. “Comfy enough?”

She hadn’t, which was to be expected since she was in a hospital. Her least favorite place on earth. The constant beeping of all the machines and the hustle and bustle just outside the door didn’t help the ambiance, either. But she would admit that it was a bit more comfortable than usual because he’d been kind enough to get her extra pillows before he’d left the previous evening. 

“Fine until someone blinded me at-” she glanced at the clock on the wall, “-seven in the morning.” She scowled at his giant grin. “Did you have to turn all the lights on?”

“How else would I be able to see your pretty face?” he teased. His lips pulled into a smirk when the beeping of the heart rate monitor sped up, and he winked before walking toward the door. “Remember, if you need anything, just press the little button, and I’ll come to the rescue!”

He flipped the lights back off and closed the door behind him.

It wasn’t fair of him to be attractive and flirty with her when she felt - and probably looked - like death.

She glared out of the little fortress of pillows she’d created as the door opened, his familiar voice chiming excitedly.

“You know what time it is,” Gojo called, his grin widening at the sight of her protective barrier.

“Fight m-” the words choked off when the air caught in her lungs, and she hunched over as the coughs rattled her chest.

He patted her back gently before giving her a serious look when she was finally able to breathe again.

“I can’t fight you, Kurisaki-chan,” he stated matter-of-factly as he wrapped the blood pressure cuff around her bicep. “You’d win. And those other assholes over at the nurse’s station would never let me live it down. They’d probably film it, too, and then it would end up on the internet, and then I’d never be able to leave my house again.”

The wheezing laugh escaped before she could stop it, causing his face to break into a giant, boyish grin. His already brilliant eyes somehow shined brighter when he smiled like that. She found herself blinking up at him stupidly as he turned his attention back to his task.

He had dimples.

There was that damn beeping.

“Bit faster than it was when I took it earlier,” he observed. Her neck felt hot, especially when his grin turned smug, but he just jotted down the numbers and placed her pillows back where they had been.

Her brow furrowed in confusion when she heard Gojo’s voice just outside her door.

He had been in earlier to get her vitals before he left for the evening, so she wasn’t sure what he was doing back. The only thing she could think of was if they needed more bloodwork, which made her actually want to fight him.

The door opened, and he slipped inside, holding his left hand behind his back. She knew he could see the panic in her eyes, but it shifted into a glare when he laughed.

“I’m a bit hurt you’re so upset to see me,” Gojo teased, his lips pulling into a pout. “You can breathe easy. I’m not here to poke or prod you again, Kurisaki-chan.”

“What are you hiding, then?” she asked suspiciously. “If you have a damn needle, I’ll-”

“Threaten to fight me?” he asked, eyes shining with amusement. She leaned over, trying to see what he had, and he tutted. “Ah, ah. No peeking. I have a gift for you since you’ve been such a model patient this week, right now excluded.”

Rolling her eyes, she gave him a slightly unimpressed look.

“What kind of gift?”

“Just a little something to remember me by,” he stated happily. “You’ll most likely get discharged tomorrow, but I won’t be here since it’s my day off. Soooo-” he pulled his hand from behind his back to dramatically brandish a small stuffed panda, “-I wanted to give you this. You can look at him and think about the best nurse you’ve ever met in your life.”

Her eyebrows shot up at the sight of the stuffed animal, a surprised laugh escaping at the fact that it was wearing scrubs and had a felt stethoscope draped around its neck. It was cute.

The boyish grin that showed off his dimples was back. Deep cerulean blue made her feel like she was drowning. When her eyes met his, she felt her neck heat up when the damn beeping sped up like it always did.

“Thank you,” she murmured, gnawing on her bottom lip. “And thank you for being so kind this week. Sorry if I was a bit rude-”

“I don’t take it personally,” he cut her off, still smiling. “You clearly aren’t a fan of hospitals. Most people aren’t. But I do like to think my incredible charm makes it a bit more bearable.”

“A bit,” she conceded, unable to fight the urge to return his grin. “Thank you again. And for- the gift.”

“It was my pleasure,” he replied easily, moving back to the door. “Now, I’m heading out for the night. Take care of that little guy, yeah? I know it’s a big responsibility, but I think you’re up for the task after I did such a great job caring for you.” He paused at the door. “But if you forget, I left some instructions in his pocket to help you remember!”

He tossed her a wink before he was gone, and she blinked stupidly after him. 

Pursing her lips, she reached into the tiny pocket curiously to find a torn piece of notebook paper folded up. Another laugh escaped before she could stop it as she read his scribbled ‘instructions.’

Fun anecdote: years ago, when I was in the hospital, a student nurse came into the room at 7:30 after I'd barely slept at all, flipped the lights on, and was like, "GOOD MORNING, [KIKO]. MY NAME IS KATE. HOW DID YOU SLEEP? I'M HERE TO CHECK YOUR VITALS-" and I feel like the fact that I still remember her fucking name after all these years tells you enough about how much I hated her in that moment.

[hootbon]

IMPROMPTU BON SUPPORT:

"I was deficient in braincells" and "I was a dumbass kid back then that made cringe content."

ATDSS, Bon. All Teens Do Stupid Stuff. If anyone ever looks back at their life and doesn't admit to some cringe, they're lying.

The simple fact is: kids and teens do cringey stuff. I was a hyper, Invader Zim quoting Gamer-kid who itched for THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE to kick off and my irl bestie? She had an Organization XIII name (Which I still call her sometimes) and hooded trench coat to go with it, and she more than once printed off Naruto yaoi fanfics at school, once accidentally to the main office. That doesn't even scratch the surface lol.

When we look back and laugh and cringe at it all, it's because we've grown to know that a lot of what we did was socially unacceptable. But the most important part is to forgive yourself because, at the time, you were probably doing your best!

And even better: after you forgive your old cringe-ass self, you learn to embrace it. "Fuck yeah I was a dumb kid who sang the doom song at 300 decibels, lil me was having the time of his short life! Fuck yeah I'm a grown-ass adult talking about jester-shaped blorbos, that bitch makes my heart happier than it's been in years!"

So long as you're not hurting yourself or anyone else: do you, my dude, and love doing it. Life's too short to hate on your old self.

WAAAAA

I know I know, everyone tells me that and i know, being stupid is a part of life. As much as I might have hated the content I put out in the past, I still like to keep it with me, like my scratch account, my older tumblrs (you’ll never find them), even my old ass deviant art account I stopped using. Hell I even keep the sketchbooks I had all the way from 3rd grade. I’ll keep telling people I was cringe and idiotic but mostly I never mean it as much as I word it

But.. thank you.. these words made me feel better to hear another person say

[pixelm0on]

Right person wrong time

Pt2/ pt1

- this is how I’m coping apparently. Lil Eddie angst to get it out of my system. Not proof read. This is part 2 of the 15 min nonsense I posted earlier. If y’all wanna see the rest of my shit click on the pixelm0on tag

Eddie was the kindest man you’ve ever met, despite that you can’t bring yourself to admit you love him. He sits opposite of you, massive joint adorning his hand along with the many rings you loved so much. His eyes sparkling at the sight of you, sinking into his chair. ”hey princess” you catch the way his smile breaks when you look away.

You mean to tell him to stop, but everytime you see him it’s like a light turns on in your chest, like a cleansing warm light. His sweet voice telling you he understands but he can’t help it either. And you tried so hard to stay away from his places, from the one place you knew you could find him. The heart ache of never seeing him again too strong to keep you at any real distance.

You mean to say stop but he did. And you search your one place, when he doesn’t even glance at you your heart breaks. You try to go out with Nancy and Jonathan, and all you can think is all you wanna say to Eddie. You know it’s for the best so you leave him alone. Looking from a distance. You can’t help but wonder if he’s hurting just as much as you.

“Why do you keep coming here?” He asks without turning his eyes on you, drink in hand staring into the distance. Your eyes scrambled through his beard and the way his face tenses up as your eyes lay upon it. “Needed to know you were okay” you spit out sounding more hurt than you’d like.

“I don’t understand y/n you said you couldn’t do it” his gaze finally sets on you a hint of regret instantly splays on his features. Your crying eyes might be too much for him. “I know I can’t help the thought of maybe one day, I can’t stand not talking to you” you’re the one looking away now.

“I can’t just be there y/n” your heart breaks and you know he’s right and that you need to stop walking in here “be mine” his voice trembles as he says it. ”I’m scared” you lock eyes those beautiful puppy dog eyes “I’ll fail it’ll hurt” he sighs

“Ok” he says.

[puppiesandnightlock]

Link: My Blood (super sons week day five)

Summary:

Damian reflects on the use of the nickname "dami" and jon tells him abt some new words he learned in arabic.

also known as some angsty shit that started out rlly sweet but ended with a possible dead damian??

The first time that Jon had called Damian “Dami”, he had instantly recoiled, with a stubborn response of “Don’t call me that.” 

After all, how could he know what it meant to him?

Nevertheless, he persisted. His brothers had taken to calling him what they assumed was only a shortened version of his name, as well as his father on rare occasions.

After a particularly hard battle, Jon had said it with such reverence, he nearly believed him when he did, although he was quick to snap back at him. 

A few similar altercations like that, and Jon had stopped, changing it to various other little nicknames, somehow only ringing it out in the most dire of situations, when emotions ran high.

It sent a pang to Damian’s heart, because although he wouldn't admit it, he missed hearing the word from his lips.

And if he were to die, that would be the last thing he wanted to hear.

“NO! No, Damian, stay with me. Stay with me, bud, just a little longer..” Jon’s face was streaked with tears, and Damian reached a bloodstained hand from where he was laying, his head on Jon's lap.

“Isn’t it funny?” He said suddenly, the world going dizzy.

The sky behind Jon was an orange-purple hue, the battlefield littered with bodies and metal pieces, and battered heroes stubling together, trying to find each other.

“What’s funny, D?” 

“You all call me Dami. and here I am, covered in my blood. ”

“Damian, Damian, please don’t-” Jon choked out, looking anywhere but Damian’s stomach, where an alien spear had pierced through the kevlar of his suit.

His hand cupped Jon’s face, bringing him back towards him. 

“Hey. Hey, look at me. It’s okay. You can let go. I’ll be okay, I promise.”

A heartbroken laugh sounded from the younger boy as he looked down at him, brushing the matted hair from his emerald eyes.

How he would miss them..

“Oh, Dami…”

“I’ll be okay, Jon. You know why? Because I'll have you with me wherever I go.” He gave a smile, the broken domino on his face sliding down.

Jon held him, desperately praying for a miracle, for at least a Bat to show up to see Damian should the worst happen.

His eyes grew heavy, and he let a smile grace his lips. “You know to tell them I love them, right?”

“Dami, stop, you're not going to die, you’re not!”

The younger boy pleaded with him, the pain in his face something that hurt Damian more than the gaping hole in his stomach.

“Call it a nap, then. Will you talk to me? I want to see you smile.”

A wobbly grin spread across his features, and his hand ran through the bleeding boy’s hair as he began to talk.

“I was so confused, why you were always so mad when I called you Dami, why you always told me to stop. I remembered you did speak arabic a lot, and so i looked it up. I found how much it must have meant to you, so I switched it up. I used it only when I wanted you to know I meant it. 

“You are my blood, my heart, my soul. You’re a part of me, a teammate, my partner. I found a few more terms like that. Hayati was my favorite. That describes who you are to me, Dami. You’re my life, my light…my whole world. I love you so much/”

His eyes shut, and the world went dark, He floated off in his mind, to wherever this would take him, with the reminisce of the words Jon had left him with. 

I love you. I love you, I love you, I love you. My life.

Hayati.

A/N:

DAMIAN NUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

okay, you choose, did he die or was he saved????? personally i would have gone with death lmao yes i did cry a lil writing this thats how u know its good lol

i may be persuaded to put up a poll on who wants him to die and who wants him to live and write a sequel on whichever is most popular O.o

if u read it and feel the need to screm at me for doing this, go ahead id love to c it lmao

for @super-sons-week-2023

[sorrowful-sparrow]

Here’s some thoughts I’ve had about our sweet boy Ed-weird-o. This has no organization, is straight off the dome mostly but he’s just so asdfgjk;/&-/)/@ ✨✨

The reason his kindness shines through his tough/metal head exterior is because he knows how lonely he’s felt as a kid and doesn’t want to let the endearingly named sheepies ever succumb to what society and the “American dream” thinks they should enjoy

Even if Henderson (his favourite even though he’d never admit it out loud in such words) annoys the piss out of him with the fact that he NEVER SHUTS UP OR IS WRONG. It would hurt Eddie so bad if he had the same moment Steve did when Steve pumped him up before the snowball

Like Eddie would wanna throw DOWN

“FUCK THAT HENDERSON. Who gives A SHIT if they think you’re weird or a nerd. They’re just pissed they don’t have a single iota of your intelligence or creativity”

“FUCK MAN.” Fusses with his hair and tries to catch his breath and just makes himself more annoyed “who the hell do they think they are?!”

Finally de-escalates after Dustin keeps trying to calm him down with a super shocked face “dude… am I your favourite?” Cheeky grin

“Shut the hell up Henderson! It just makes me so—”

“Does this mean I can help with the Next campaign?”

Eddie scoffs, slightly offended “does my mastery of the dungeon not meet your expectations?”

“NO! Of course not! I just think if we collaborated we could really show them- ”

Then they argue/collaborate about the next campaign Eddie swinging from excitedly needing to take notes but not having paper or wanting this wave length of PURE GOLD to stop for him to find some

Later when he’s at home at the trailer (IF HE DOESNT GET DISTRACTED 🤦‍♀️) he’s furiously trying to remember everything and write quick notes so he can elaborately trick Dustin into falling into a trap

Plot twist: Dustin probably doesn’t. That kid is too friggin’ smart

Okay that was a lot of one scenario of Eddie and Dustin but I just love them guys. The brotherly vibe they give off is just 🥹🥹🥹

Eddie with a girlfriend would INSIST he isn’t whipped or a “simp” at first

But he totally is.. cmon.

If that guy got a single sliver of undivided attention from a pretty babe he’d fucking run with it.

He’d probably be such an annoying dick 😂

“I’ll have you know my sweet Dungeon Mistress, (Y/N), thinks the next campaign is BRILLIANT and MY BEST WORK, don’t you babe? Tell them.”

“I just complimented your hard work Eds.. please”

“BAAABE!” He clutches at his heart, offended, wounded, defeated “… it’s dungeon master… please…” pouty pleading cow eyes

She sighs, “it’s his best work, prepare yourselves for—“

Eddie leaps to covers your mouth before you can give them a single clue “BABE! SPOILERS!”

The younger boys are just like, “wtf Eddie..”

Also I have this really stupid one where he’s so drunk off beers, and you, and the summer heat

You guys are just chillin at the trailer, he’s laying, rambling and just so infatuated with the fact that you put up with his shit (AND DRUNK, guys.. seriously this is important)

Wayne left the radio on before going to work his night shift and Forever and Ever, amen comes on

And he just stops

Shoots out of your lap

“UGH. What the fuck is this shit?!”

You say, “I kinda like it..” sheepishly preparing for a rant about how THIS is not music, ITS SHIT made to make nuclear rural families feel like they’ve done the right thing by selling out and living that stupid fucking apple pie life the MAN tries to shove down everyone’s throat

And Eddie just stares at you, and without missing a beat BELTS OUT THIS SONG TO YOU.

With dramatic flair, and heavy eye contact.

And then you guys just laugh wildly and cuddle

And you threaten to tell everyone about it

And he tackles you and pins you down, “not if I keep you here forever”

There’s a pause.

You say, sarcastically cautious, “forever and ever?”

“Amen”

Kay I’m done. I just. This boy. I can’t 🥲🥲 he’s such a lil dweeb and I love him

[lightning-writes]

good heart (faulty machine of a man) - 7/30

fic summary: bucky meets someone at therapy

chapter summary: bucky steps forward

word count: 876

tags: brotp: sam x bucky (brotp used loosely), post endgame, pre tfatws, hurt/comfort, slow burn, canon divergent, canon compliant, au

warnings: panic attack mention

a/n: have fun with this lil bucky x rue moment! also, if you're feeling generous, head over to ao3 to drop a kudos or a comment...!

AO3 MASTERLIST X

October 14

Rue is hunched over a box behind the receptionist's desk, bending her knees, getting ready to lift. Without thinking, Bucky strides behind the desk and lifts it, effortlessly, for her.

“James–”

“Bucky.”

“No, James,” she hisses. He sees her trying to remain mad, despite fighting off a smile. Suddenly, her hands are over his eyes. Her fingertips are cold. “There’s confidential information there!”

He actually chuckles. “I’ll keep my eyes shut.”

“How do I know that?” she says exasperated.

“You can trust me.”

“I can trust you?” she echoes. “I trust no one!”

(He wants to tell her that’s a good instinct she has going for her there, but he holds back. What he should be telling her is he’s done a lot of missions with impaired visuals, so moving a box to the desk with closed eyes was nothing.)

“You can trust me,” he insists, making a show of screwing his eyes shut. “Guide me.”

He feels her hesitation, then her hands over his. He feels her gently steer him, her little shuffles as a careful attempt to walk backward in her platform shoes. Again, he could laugh.

When he feels the edge of the table, he sets the box down and, with hands up in surrender, he backs away, eyes still closed. She guides him back around the desk.

(This time, her hands are more confidently on his waist.)

“This,” she gestures to the area around her, “is off limits. Don’t come behind the desk.” She peers over at the closed office doors.

“You could say thank you.” The cheeky retort is out of his mouth before he can stop it.

“What I could do is lose my job due to HIPAA violations!” He doesn’t know what that means, but he sees her battle panic and amusement. “So, thank you, Mr. Super Soldier Man, but I’d be more thankful if you didn’t get my ass fired.”

(She’s funny.)

“They won’t fire you,” he says. She raised a brow. “You’re the best receptionist here.”

“Are you flirting me, James?” she says distractedly, pulling a file from the box and perusing it.

“Oh, am I ‘James’ now?”

“For the foreseeable future.” She looks at him through her lashes, a playful scorn.

(He sees her flush, but she’s being bold. They both are.)

“Raynor mentioned it,” he admits, pushing his hair out of his face. “That time, last week, when she asked you to do a list of things in the middle of my session, and you’d said you already did them.”

(But, he thinks, to answer your question - yes, I am flirting with you.)

////

One of Sam’s texts is a location. He sends Bucky activities to do, things to check out, despite living in Washington D.C.

There’s an old school boxing gym in Bushwick that’ll keep your membership on the DL.

(Bucky has to Google what ‘on the DL’ means.)

Tell them I sent you, they’ll take care of you.

Bucky finds himself in the neighborhood one Tuesday, twenty minutes after the gym has closed, but he sees the lights still on. He knocks, cupping his hands to the glass to see inside. An older man, probably in his sixties, comes to the door with a broom.

“We’re closed,” he starts, but Bucky holds his empty hands up.

“Sam Wilson told me to come,” Bucky rushes. “He told me you’d be willing to let me work out here. I’m James – uh, Bucky Barnes.”

“He said you might stop by.” The man gives him a sly smile, like he knows something about Bucky, but Bucky assumes Sam talked about him.

“I’d appreciate it if you didn’t tell him he was right,” Bucky jokes.

The man grins, taking Bucky’s outstretched prosthetic hand. “I’m George. Welcome to Fogwell’s Gym.”

George lends him a pair of boxing gloves and some tape. He tells Bucky, tonight, he’ll stay for an hour, but eventually, he doesn’t mind cutting him a key. He mentions that ‘his friend’ used to work out here from time to time, too. 

(He also gives Bucky his condolences.)

When Bucky tells him he can’t really pay for a membership right now, George claps a hand on his shoulder, gripping at the metal.

“Son, I’d be damned if I let a hero pay me a dime.”

(Bucky remembers these words for years to come.)

Bucky tries the boxing gloves, his muscle memory stronger than his actual memory. Images of him sparring with his dad and teaching his sister a few moves flicker in and out as he uses his teeth to tighten the laces. The glove feels uncomfortable over his prosthetic, but he gives the sandbag a few good natured jabs.

Eventually, he just wraps his right hand in tape and lays into the bag. He hears the support beams strain from his blows, but he’s possessed by something deep. Punch after punch, he feels the tightness in his chest build until he realizes he’s been holding his breath. When George goes to tell him time’s up, he finds Bucky on the ground, gasping for air.

George asks, “Are you okay, son?” and Bucky laughs in wheezes.

(For once, he’s winded because he’s out of shape and not because of a panic attack.)

[waitingx2xdie]

She shook her head, tongue licking across and pushing out her top lip in the process. “I’ll work on that.” A BITTER REBUTTAL with narrow eyes and a sarcastically nodding head. “But if you would…” She intentionally let the words hand for a moment before pointedly adding: “Pardon my fucking French, I’m a lil pissed off right now.” Seriously. Nora was REALLY expecting Kat to reel in her emotions? To silence her tongue? To not speak her damn mind? After walking in on THIS?! “Yes. Scarred for life. Not every day you walk in on someone fucking their own sister. Never mind the fact that it’s YOU she’s fucking…” Was she giving too much of her inner turmoil away? Hinting at the TRUTH in her heart? As if Kat was capable of thinking that far ahead. She’d scold herself in the morning. “I’m being dramatic? Have you seen this bitch?!” Incredulous shock as she held arms out to draw Nora’s attention to her PANIC-RIDDEN SISTER. “She fucks up ALL OF THIS and then goes on a pity-me parade and I’M the one overreacting?” A deep sigh. She knew she was being petty. Petty and bitter. But she was HURTING. What did Nora expect? A girl so unattuned to her own emotions she couldn’t even admit to a girl that she LIKED HER was now supposed to somehow handle whatever fucking insanity came with walking in on said girl sleeping with another woman? And she was supposed to handle that pain better than her initial repression with all the same oppressive mental faculties? That was some WISHFUL THINKING.

Simmering fury bubbled at the surface, Kat falling to silence, OBSERVING AS THE OBJECT OF HER TROUBLED AFFECTIONS turned her attention back to her baby sister, holding her closer and offering maternal, familial comforts. She clung. Clung to the notion of Nora’s soft defense, pulling Emily down from the edge, and throwing a feather of understanding in Kat’s corner, even in spite of Kat’s continued outburst. In Times like this, Nora’s profession as a school teacher most shined through. Patience unrivaled, negotiations unmatched. Like a hostage negotiator calmly talking down two TIGHTLY WOUND FUSES and perfectly identifying the inner strife of her subjects. She was right after all… Kat WAS just hurt. She WAS just lashing out. Even if Nora being the one to defend her left her feelings disgustingly, despicably, exposed and vulnerable. “Well, you’re half right. We certainly can’t have anyone making any stupid mistakes now, can we?” Still, she couldn’t bite her tongue. Shit, she’d even MEANT THAT, but smarting heartache had it dripping with venom. Physically INCAPABLE of maintaining a mask of civility. “You better hope she wouldn’t.” Eyes flickered, locking on Emily with all the focus of a predator on the prowl. “You. Better hope you wouldn’t either. Because if I find you did…” Dot. Dot. Dot. 

Trailing words carried all the threat she needed. And she didn’t finish that sentence because she was full of shit or even out of mercy, or some misguided sense of guilt. No. She was under NO illusion that she’d tear Emily’s teeth out if she really DID rape Nora. Even just the thought made her SICK; teeth peeling back, fists clenching. Nora meant EVERYTHING to her. She was the only thing that still meant ANYTHING AT ALL. And therein lay the only reason she’d censored herself: NORA. The girl currently juggling three separate burdens of despair. Set aside her OWN hysteria to piece together the shattering minds of the only two girls who meant anything at all to HER. Was it selfish of Kat to hope that Nora saw her pettiness, spite, and wrath, all in ironic or maybe serendipitous, spite of her best efforts to extinguish the flames of betrayal BURNING in her heart, as a ringing indictment or just how much Nora and Emily had HURT Kat tonight? The answer didn’t matter. For, in any case, it was truly the only thing Kat had left to hold onto. When Nora had pleaded her silence, it had been all Kat could bring herself to do to leave with one last parting cheap shot. But it was what Nora had wanted right? Not for Kat to VERBALLY LOW BLOW HER on her way out, but rather, for Kat to give Nora and Emily space to recollect themselves and calm down. Kat could only pray… Because she damn wasn’t capable of offering Nora anything else…

                                                           ————

Tremors shot through Emily like her bones were tectonic plates, grinding up against one another, sending aftershocks of PURE, UNLEADED ANXIETY right through her skeleton. Even as Nora swept her up into her arms and cradled her close to her heart—More than a little TOO CLOSE to the same breast and nipple Emily had just been suckling on mere minutes prior for anyone’s comfort right about now—Those reverberations had her TRAPPED; Feeling like one of those cartoon slapstick gags where the character actually gets zapped and simply convulse in place, helplessly paralyzed MID-SEIZURE. Boy, those cartoons got a lot darker when you applied real-world logic to the COMEDIC CARICATURE NATURE of their expressions of PAIN… “But she’s shouting at you…” She pouted but notably DID fall into silence for Kat’s continued verbal bitch slaps. “I dunno… She really seems to hate us now…” Perhaps a telltale sign of growing self-hatred and insecurity within Emily. She’d been the frontrunner for pushing, teasing, bullying, and mocking Kat for her, ahem, ‘INCLINATIONS’ toward Nora. Hell, where Nora excelled in the academy, Emily had learned on the streets. She prided herself on reading the people around her, but then again, she also believed she’d seen countless signs of Nora RECIPROCATING her twisted sense of sissy love and she’d been wrong about that, hadn’t she? Insofar as Nora would have her believe… Still, the point remained Emily should’ve been the first person to notice that Kat was acting like a TEXTBOOK closet lover right about now. “I wouldn’t…” Penultimate affirmation of her innocence spoken limply, all breathy and quiet, until… 

“You. Better hope you wouldn’t either. Because if I find you did…”

In a single brief respite, or perhaps a moment more akin to SEEING RED, Emily spoke with gnashing teeth. “I. DIDN’T.” Her final rebuttal left no room for doubt. If Kat pursued this, she was MORE than prepared to make this shit as VIOLENT as it NEEDED to be. Thankful, though she was, for the HUSHED SUCCOR, of her big sis. A simple hand tending through now messy blonde hair, paired with three even simpler words made her world make sense through the current whirlwind of blood-red emotion. ‘It’s okay, baby…’ She nodded, trying to correct her staggered, struggling breath… “I’m okay… I’m okay…” Sniffle. Sniffle… And just like that, Kat was gone. “I dunno… I really don’t know… Never seen her like this before… Who knew she knew so much French…?” Weak attempt at a joke, was all she could muster. In a single moment of thoughtless weakness, she nuzzled into Nora’s chest, nose brushing against her breast, eyes fluttering shut, trying to find the strength to curl those lips into a smile. Could anyone blame her? The way Nora held her close, hands through her hair, moving to scrape against the back of her neck, nails pinpricking like a tattoo pen as she painted invisible ink into her flesh. She shuddered when Nora finally pulled away, only to be mesmerized by the TRANSIENCE of Nora gazing deep into her eyes. The nod, smile, and promise came so easy in that moment of isolated serenity. “I will… I promise…”

Bed shifted as Nora stood to adjust her gown and check herself over, leaving her baby sister to do the same. A wipe of her tears, grabbing at a towel. “I’mma hit the bathroom, get cleaned up… I…” It was then she noticed, as Nora shifted her nightgown into place… Twin peaks poking through the thin material; HARDENED NIPPLES. Was that cold night air, adrenaline, or… HER CLIT THROBBED. She couldn’t breathe, so she swallowed, in hopes of dislodging the lump trapped in her throat with no luck until Nora spoke up. “‘Course I can. You’d trust me to do that for you? After…” She shrunk again, eyes drifting to the carpet. “Y-Yeah! I’ll be right behind you!” Emily grasped at Nora like a LIFELINE, following her every word and move as if GOSPEL. Motivated by fear, love, or a sense of lost desperation? No one could say. But… But a base display of obedience had made it tenfold easier for Emily to manage that CHAOS built up in her skull, pressing against the bone cage like a fire extinguisher ready to EXPLODE. With that, she fixed her tank top and shorts before retreating to the bathroom. A splash of cold water on her face was exactly what she needed to ground herself back in this reality…

                                                           ————

Kat had never felt so… So at an end… WRUNG OUT… This is why she never put her skin in the game… Relying on other people HURT. And for all her bark and icy defenses, she had never been one to survive the DEEP CUTS that humans were so fated to suffer. She had been so stupid to let herself go all soft on Nora Carpenter. And even stupider not to tell her she was… Like, seriously, in what world does a woman just keep on waiting forever for a COMMITMENTPHOBE that would NEVER make the first move? If anything, Kat should’ve been counting her goddamn lucky stars that it was EMILY feeling her up tonight. Because had it been anyone else? Maybe Nora really WOULD have let them… Stomach twisted and she took a drink. Gin burned, counterintuitive for someone NOT wanting to throw up right about now… The tick of the clock on the wall, next to the fridge, accompanied her, her only company at that. Tick. Tick. Tick. Paranoia began to set in. STUPID BITCH. She never should’ve left those two alone… Who knew WHAT they were talking about… Or getting up to, for that matter… She drowned those fears, irrational as they were, or at least irrational as she HOPED they were, in a second glass of gin on the rocks, eyes pinching shut, head shaking as she waited for the AFTERBURN to die down. FUCK. “Shit…” Glass clattered against wood, right as the door latch sounded out, and she poured herself another glass…

“Hey…”

Glance out the corner of her eye and she greeted Nora with a single pointed finger toward the chair opposite. In that brief moment of Nora taking her seat, Kat quickly swabbed her eyes clean of tears, moisture clinging to her palm. “Hey…” A hard swallow. FUCK her throat hurt. (Everything fucking hurt.) “About time one of you apologized…” She couldn’t look Nora in the eyes for fear her own were puffy, flooded, and red. “You want some?” A lift of her bottle, proffering it up to the old woman, only to slide the fresh glass across and keep the handle to herself. No, she HADN’T waited for an answer. “We’re still one short…” A quick sigh, an even quicker swig. “Probably for the best…” She screwed the tap back on. “Now I can get a real answer outta you…” Arm on table; fingers a tap, tap, tapping against the oak. For the first time, she managed to meet Nora’s eyes. “Look me in the eyes. And tell me. That you believe Emily would never, could never, do this on purpose. With intent to…” (RAPE YOU…)

                                                           ————

Turned out, her face wasn’t the ONLY THING she needed to clean while in the bathroom… And her own feelings had only grown EVER MORE CONFUSED in the wake of their midnight mistake. Not only had Emily seen signs of arousal from Nora in the form of hard nipples, peaking out through the fabric of her nightgown… But… But this…? This was DEFINITELY Nora’s juice coating her fingers right now… Startling realization had her clit throbbing and had her FROZE UP in the mirror, gazing down at her sticky fingers. It took EVERY OUNCE OF CONTROL as she lifted those fingertips to her lips, pressing them against soft flesh not to stick her tongue out and gorge on the FORBIDDEN JUICES of her very own sister. Perhaps her resilience had been born out of a stubborn need to forge a self-made testament of strength and will to prove to HERSELF that tonight had been little more than a mistake. That she truly WASN’T capable of despoiling her sister like this. And that she COULD make the conscious choices that respected, honored, her sister’s modesty, privacy, innocence, security, and sacrality. A hard swallow and she washed the juices over under the hot tap before wiping her face and hands down, taking a breath and—...

“Look me in the eyes. And tell me. That you believe Emily would never, could never, do this on purpose. With intent to…”

Her breath caught. She wanted to announce her presence. But she needed to hear Nora’s answer. In a moment of fate, she opened her mouth to speak… 

“Hey…”

"I just think there are more appropriate ways to… express yourself." They were all adults here. Nora knew that. Still, maternal instinct had her scolding Kat for her language. There were certain words she simply wouldn’t allow under her roof, NO MATTER THE COMPANY — When Tim was alive, she'd kept a swear jar in the kitchen. Every time he slipped, three bucks of allowance went in. Incentivized him to KEEP HIS MOUTH CLEAN. Maybe she should set something like that up again? Lord knows Emily & Kat could use a little "incentivizing." Canine sunk into the inside of her cheek. Biting down HARD. Was that the taste of iron her tongue? "Scarred for life?" Tone was incredulous, "Don't you think you're being a bit dramatic?" Woman worked fifteen hours a day, was a chronic smoker, had death stalking her, & THIS was what was gonna push her to seek out a second therapist? Despite her clear disbelief, large hazels swirled with compassion for Kat as she rocked her sister in a warm, protective embrace. Cradling her against bosom like a child. She wasn't WITHOUT SYMPATHY for the brunette. This was a really odd situation. (putting it lightly) She wasn't really sure what to make of it. & She couldn't blame Kat for being upset, either. Even if their relationship status read : COMPLICATED. Physical & emotional attraction had been slowly developing over the past four months... They just hadn't had the courage to put a label on it. Not helped by the fact that Emily always seemed to walk in on them just as things were about to get HEATED.

"Hey..." Dainty digits dragged affectionately through matching blonde strands as she held her sister's cheek CLOSE TO HER HEART, the sound of it beating had always comforted her in the past. Though, she supposed, considering the circumstances, this was inappropriate. Young girl had just had those pretty lips of hers wrapped around her... NOT THINKING ABOUT IT. "Don't shout at her, Em..." It wouldn't help anything. Kat might have been exaggerating, but she was rightfully upset. & If she needed to take that anger out on Nora, Nora didn't mind taking the hits. Wasn't the first time she'd played the role of PUNCHING BAG, & it wouldn't be the last. "She knows I didn't do anything wrong... She's just hurt and lashing out..." Kat wasn't gonna appreciate her pointing out THE TRUTH. "We all need to take a breather and calm down before things get outta hand." Death had skipped Emily, but her sister wasn't on the same list as her & Kat. It could come back around for any of them at any moment, & the last thing they needed was to give it A HELPING HAND. "It's okay, baby..." Breathed softly into blonde strands, chin resting against her skull as she watched her "friend" closely. "She's a troubled girl but she wouldn't manipulate me like that..." Why did she sound like she was trying to convince herself?

ANGER WASN'T GOING AWAY ANYTIME SOON — Kat's voice trembled & dripped with contempt. She was fed up with Emily, & Nora honestly couldn't BLAME HER. Her sister was a handful. Had been since the day she was born, would continue to be until the day she died. & IT WASN'T FAIR that Kat had to suck it up & kick away her feelings, to give Em a chance to calm down. (wasn't fair that nora had to do so either) "Kat, please..." She pleaded.

'Just be careful not to fuck her again while I’m gone…'

"It's not like that and you —" She was cut off by the other's back as she turned & walked down the hallway in the direction of the kitchen. Clacking of heels soon faded. Leaving behind a heavy, AWKWARD SILENCE hanging between the siblings. "It's okay." Pathetic attempt at a smile followed by a weak chuckle, "Not the first time she's been pissed at me. Happens all the time. She'll get over it." Suffice to say, this was a bit different than last night when Kat got annoyed with her for secretly sneaking some extra veggies into her meal. (what could she say? girl was skin & bones, she needed to eat better) "Mistakes happen..." Mistakes like this?. She stroked her fingers across the nape of the younger girl's neck, nails scratching patterns into flesh. Eventually, she pulled away and looked Emily in the eyes, "If you really wanna make it up to me, you should go out there and apologize to HER."

After the other had calmed down, Nora climbed out of the bed, adjusting her nightgown & biting her bottom lip as she glanced over herself in the mirror — Talk about A DISHEVELED MESS. Fingers combed through tangled strands. "Do you think you can braid my hair tomorrow?" She couldn't do it herself. Letting out a deep breath she prepared herself for the emotional conversation that would follow once she left the safety of her bedroom. HEART WAS HAMMERING AWAY. Was she really ready to talk about this? NO. But, she couldn't just leave Kat out there dealing with her inner turmoil alone. She wasn't that SELFISH. (she cared too much) "Fix yourself up and come on." She wasn't the only mess. Her sister still had tears on her cheeks & STICKY FINGERS. With that, she exited the room, slowly walking down the hallway toward the kitchen where she caught sight of Kat nursing a bottle of Gin, while she... WAS SHE CRYING? Did Kat Jennings cry? Huh. In that moment, she looked more vulnerable, more human, than Nora had ever witnessed. "Hey..." Soft voice announced her presence, "Sorry about all that... We're ready to talk if you are..."

[justabigassnerd]

Things you do for love

Pairing - Young Remus Lupin x reader

Word count - 2,122

Warnings - lil' bit of angst, fluff

Summary - you become an animagus to keep Remus company during full moons without his knowledge

A/N -hey y'all! Since my last Remus fic did pretty well I figured I'd dip my toes back into the Marauders and write a new fic for my beloved Remus. This is a repost as my last post didn't come up under the tags for some reason. As per y'all, please send in requests, feedback and enjoy!

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Remus cursed the moon every month but this month the moon decided to be particularly cruel to him and rear its ugly head the day he was due to go back to Hogwarts. He knew almost the second he made it to Hogsmeade he’d be forced down to the Shrieking Shack to transform and miss at least half of the first day of school and he was pissed about it. He didn’t even know if the Marauders were going to join him tonight, they’d likely be exhausted from the journey, and he couldn’t blame them if they just wanted to sleep. He knew he could at least count on seeing you in the morning when he woke up in the hospital wing. Even before the pair of you became a couple, you would always be there by his side when he woke up, worrying about him or brushing the hair away from his eyes. It was one of the many reasons why he loved you.

Madam Pomfrey was waiting for him the second he stepped off the train at Hogsmeade, she barely gave him any time to say goodbye to the Marauders or you and just hustled him towards the shack that he dreaded entering every month he was at Hogwarts. Madam Pomfrey apologised for dragging him away so quickly, but she wanted to be sure they’d get there before Remus transformed. Remus figured, going off the gentle throbbing in his body, that they had at least fifteen minutes before he transformed but he was glad Madam Pomfrey got him away quickly so there wasn’t the risk of him hurting anyone.

“I’ll be back for you in the morning Remus.” Madam Pomfrey says, as she always does on full moons, her voice gentle and motherly as she approaches the door, looking over her shoulder at the young boy standing in the room. His mouth curved into a small smile as he nods. Madam Pomfrey would never admit it to anyone, but Remus Lupin was her favourite student, and she held a large soft spot for him in her heart. It always broke her heart to leave him in the cold shack once a month and then see the damage done to his body the next morning. She wished more than anything that she could do something to help him. However, she had noticed that in his third year, his injuries seemed less severe than they did in his first two years at Hogwarts. She had no clue what had happened for that to happen, but she was just relieved he was never too injured.

Five minutes after Madam Pomfrey had locked Remus in the shack for the first time of this year at Hogwarts the door opened and closed swiftly and when Remus didn’t see anyone, he knew just who had come in.

“Alright you lot, show yourselves.” He calls, sitting on the bed in the room and watching as the invisibility cloak is dropped, revealing James and Sirius, with Peter as Wormtail perched on James’ shoulder, scampering down, and changing back into Peter.

“Did you really think we’d not show up tonight?” Sirius jokes, sitting beside Remus and throwing an arm around his shoulder, jostling him lightly as they both laugh.

“We promised we’d help you every full moon at Hogwarts.” Peter says, sitting on Remus’ other side as James crosses to stand in front of the three.

“Tonight is no exception, Moony. We’re always here for you.” James says, an unusual seriousness in his tone as he regards Remus softly.

“I know. I’m lucky you lot are the ones I’m stuck with, aren’t I?” Remus jests.

“Cheeky sod!” Sirius remarks, ruffling at Remus’ hair as Peter laughs. Remus manages to escape Sirius’ attack, standing beside James and falling silent when his body throbs strongly.

“You lot should probably change. I don’t think it’ll be too long now…” Remus says, a seriousness falling over the Marauders as Peter moves to open the window before changing into Wormtail as Sirius and James transform into Padfoot and Prongs. Within a few painful minutes, Remus transformed into the wolf and Padfoot and Prongs were instantly herding the wolf out of the shack and towards the Forbidden Forest. It was a routine the three animagi were used to by now and were happily following Moony into the forest when he suddenly froze, ears and nose twitching. He then bolted towards a small clearing where a fox was emerging from behind a tree, tail bristling and ears upright and alert. Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs recognised the fox instantly and were watching Moony nervously, hoping he wouldn’t attack the fox as they both cautiously approached each other.

When the fox and the wolf met in the middle, the unexpected happened. Moony immediately nuzzled into the fox’s side as the fox barked happily, tail swishing excitedly. The fox licked Moony’s face and nibbled playfully on his ear as the three Marauders looked on. The two played excitedly for most of the night but at one point not long before the sun was due to rise, the two curled up together. Moony curled around the small fox protectively and when Padfoot stepped closer to try to herd Moony back into the Shrieking Shack, the wolf growled lowly at the dog’s close proximity to the fox. The werewolf was reluctant to leave his new fox companion behind but with a little encouragement, the stag and the dog were able to coax him into the Shrieking Shack just mere minutes before he changed back into Remus. When Remus was himself once more, the Marauders changed back from their animagus forms

“Merlin Moony, this was the best night in a while.” Peter says proudly as Remus sits on the worn bed, rubbing at his eyes.

“Yeah, you were great!” Sirius continues, crossing to shut and lock the window as James finds the invisibility cloak.

“We’ll fill you in later, yeah? Can’t risk being caught by Pomfrey right now.” James says with a wink, gesturing the other two Marauders over and wrapping the cloak around him and Sirius as Peter transforms into Wormtail so he can sit on James’ shoulder so there’s space for James and Sirius to be completely covered by the cloak. The now invisible Marauders whisper a goodbye and exit the room, locking it behind them and leaving Remus alone in the room.

“Good morning, Remus, you’re looking well. Any injuries I need to look at?” Madam Pomfrey’s gentle voice says the moment she enters the room, smiling softly at him.

“I think I’m alright. I’m bloody knackered though.” He replies, a yawn spilling past his lips as he finishes speaking.

“Let’s get you to the hospital wing so you can get some rest then, shall we?” Madam Pomfrey replies sweetly, waiting patiently for Remus to join her before they start the walk back to Hogwarts and when the two enter the hospital wing, she pulls a screen around his bed and waits for Remus to change into his pyjamas before coming around the screen to give him a little dose of sleeping potion so he could have the undisturbed sleep he needed after full moons. Remus drank the potion, thanking Madam Pomfrey quietly before relaxing back on the bed and allowing the potion to drag him into the comforting embrace of sleep.

Remus woke up in the early afternoon, slowly blinking his eyes open and adjusting to the harsh sunlight coming through the windows. As his eyes adjusted, he heard light snores coming from his side and he looked down to see you fast asleep. You were using your right arm as a pillow and your left hand was gently holding Remus’ right hand, occasionally squeezing it as you slept.

“She came in just after breakfast. The poor dear looked so exhausted so I told her to get in a bed and rest, but she just wanted to stay by your side, so I let her stay with you. You’ve got a good one there Remus.” Madam Pomfrey says quietly as she approaches Remus’ bedside, silently checking him over before moving away to her office to give you and him some privacy. Remus smiled at the words Madam Pomfrey said before carefully extracting his hand from your gentle hold and running it through your hair, occasionally scratching at your scalp as you hum happily, beginning to stir at the soft sensation. You open your eyes, immediately locking eyes with Remus and smiling sleepily at him as you sit up, wincing as your back cracks.

“You feeling okay, Rem?” You ask once you’re sat up, taking Remus’ hand in yours again.

“I’m feeling great, love. Something different must’ve happened last night. Have the others told you if they’ve been in?” Remus asks, interlocking your fingers and looking down at them.

“Well, they didn’t exactly need to tell me anything.” You admit sheepishly, knowing that it’s better to just have this conversation now rather than hiding it.

“What do you mean?” Remus questions, looking back up at you, eyes sewn with confusion as you shuffle the seat closer to the bedside.

“I was kinda… there?” You force out, wincing at your own words and fearing Remus’ reaction.

“You were there? y/n, it’s so dangerous to be anywhere near me when I’m the wolf. I could’ve hurt you; I could’ve bitten you. I could’ve killed you.” Remus says, panicked at what you said, eyes immediately checking you over for any potential injuries.

“I know. But I wanted to help you the same way the others help you. I asked them to help me become an animagus over the summer. They explained the process to me and promised not to tell you until I was ready because I know you and I know you wouldn’t want me doing this.” You explain, looking down at the bedsheet as a brief silence falls over you.

“So you were out there last night?” Remus starts tenderly, squeezing your hand as you nod, a small smile coming to your face at the memories of the night.

“You were amazing. You uh- the second you saw me you were happy to just play with me and then you curled up with me for a bit. The others didn’t have to do anything. Although you weren’t happy when Pads came near me. But you didn’t do anything don’t worry.” You say, thinking of the night and how gentle Remus’ other half had been with you. Not at all like the monster he constantly described himself to be. You then got the courage to look up at Remus, who was clearly fighting back a soft smile as he regarded you.

“I’m not happy that you put yourself in danger just to keep me company on a full moon. But I can’t be mad because I love you and I know you had good intentions.” Remus says finally, detangling your hands and cupping your face gently, smiling when you lean into his touch.

“That’s just one of the things you do for love, is it not?” You ask, pressing a gentle kiss to his palm as he hums in acknowledgement.

“I’d rather it not but I guess it’s too late for that isn’t it?” Remus laughs gently as you move closer, sitting on the edge of his bed before leaning in, silently asking for permission to kiss him. He notices what you’re asking and closes the gap, kissing you gently.

“Miss l/n. Mr Lupin. The two of you seem nice and awake now, don’t you? I believe you can go to your afternoon classes now.” Madam Pomfrey says as she approaches the bedside, making you jump apart and laugh awkwardly at getting caught. Madam Pomfrey smiles gently at the two of you, letting you know silently that she was happy both of you were more awake and alert before she placed Remus’ uniform on the end of his bed as you dug out two timetables from your robe pocket.

“Peter gave me your timetable and told me to give it to you. I haven’t had a chance to look at what classes we have together yet.” You explain, handing the piece of paper to Remus and handing him your timetable when he gestures for it, his eyes flicking between both timetables.

“Okay, I have good news and bad news.” Remus starts, putting the papers down facedown.

“Good news first.” You reply without missing a beat.

“Good news is, we have our afternoon class together.” Remus says, laughing gently when you fist pump slightly before turning your attention back to him.

“Bad news?” You ask cautiously.

“It’s History of Magic.”

Your groan could probably be heard across the entire grounds of Hogwarts.

[eddiemsbitch]

Hello, Not sure if anyone has sent this request yet for the sweet Eddie boy but what if he finds out his s/o has powers? (Helps El and the gang?) Please and thank you

I tried, I’m severely dyslexic and this was like 3.6K words because I got a lil carried away 0.0 but if you like it lmk, if you find any errors in grammar or spelling lmk and I’ll be happy to fix it ❤️

THIS CONTAINS SEASON 4 ST SPOILERS

Ooo I’m excited to see how this turns out I also know the other half of season 4 still has like a month until it’s released so I’m gonna go off the reader goes to the upside down with them when they do go, buuut if July comes and I have an idea of the battle (and I wanna include Eddie’s hot ass guitar solo) I can write a longer end battle one if you’d like :)

There is no shame in fleeing battle and running - Eddie Munson x Reader

Summary: whenever you manage to interrogate where your boyfriend disappeared to out of your neighbor Max you follow your younger classmates, and their friends Steve and Robin to find him to find out why the fuck there was a dead girl in his trailer that you didn’t kill bc why the fuck would Chrissy be in your home with your boyfriend alone? You never would’ve thought you would be in a different world fighting demon bats, or that you’d end up outing your one secret you never told Eddie.

Warnings: loads of cussing, I mean come on it’s Eddie and the group, Eddie fluff 🥹 mentions of Chrissy’s death, a lot of the lines are pulled from season 4 episode 2 when they first find Eddie and then after that it’s freely based on you and Eddie and defeating the demon bats in the upside down.

Word count: 3,689

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Your mind was going a hundred miles an hour, whenever Eddie’s uncle called you telling you not to come home there’s been an incident you knew something bad happened, and with Eddie’s ‘Job’ you knew it had to involve him in some way. You didn’t expect to see 10 different cop cars surrounding the trailer park along with crime scene tapped around your house. Once you managed to get into the trailer park and parked you rushed to find Wayne to see what the fuck happened and where the hell your boyfriend was. “Wayne! Wayne! Wheres Eddie?” You asked grabbing his shoulders looking around “w-whats going on t-this is way t-too many cops” you asked starting to assume the worst, what if somebody laced his shit? What if that’s why the Coroner was parked outside. “Calm down Y/n…listen…I got off work…Chrissy…the girl Eddie used to..like was..she was..oh my god y/n…somebody evil killed that girl…and I don’t think it was Eddie..” he said looking at you, Wayne hated having to tell you this, he wasn’t that close with his nephew but he still loved the hell out of the weirdo, and he loved you just as much because you loved Eddie way more than anybody in their family ever did, you were like Eddie’s drug that he couldn’t live without, and watching your face change from worry to anger to sadness, because the man you loved more than anybody had left and ran without telling you a word or worse made his heart break even more for his nephew and you. “S-so Eddie’s okay?..” you asked nervously looking at him “i-I don’t know…I haven’t been able to find him since I got home..his vans gone…” he whispered before looking at you with a stern glare “promise me you will not go to find him. I love you y/n just like my own but if you try and find him and do find him…then the cops probably won’t be far behind…they won’t listen when I tell ‘em he couldn’t of done this…” he whispered sadly looking at you “I can’t do that Wayne…if the cops catch Eddie they’re gonna hurt him…show him no mercy..I can’t have that” you mumbled leaving quickly storming back to your car, Now, there is such thing as loving somebody too much, and you admit maybe you love Eddie too much, but you knew under the cocky playfully attitude he was sensitive and would cower at any demand, and he needed you to protect him, even if he didn’t think so.

As you drove through town you thought of where to start your search, you didn’t know where most of Ed’s friends lived, just the ones you had to occasionally drop off or pick up after his Hellfire campaigns. You stopped in front of Dustin Henderson’s house and parked quickly glaring at the two bikes in front of the house, Max was already here, you could tell by the chipped paint and the sticker she had taken from Billy’s room on the license plate decal of her bike. You weren’t exactly unknown to their household, having a short fling with Billy Hargrove, ending it after watching how he treated his younger sister, to which you tried to become a beacon of safety for Max.

Shutting your car door you rushed to The Henderson’s door, right before you could knock it swung open revealing the exact people you were looking for, they hurried you forward a bit so Dustin could shut the door before looking at you like you were about to tell them where their friend was. “Well. Where the fuck is he?” You asked first looking up and down at Dustin “I assume he let you one of you know or you’d have some idea” you asked looking at them worriedly “we’re gonna go to the family video and try and call all of his other friends to see if he’s hiding out there” Dustin said grabbing his bike “Good idea- what the hell are you doing? Get the hell in the car it’s much quicker” you asked motioning to your car that was horribly parked in the driveway “as long as you don’t park like that” Max mumbled walking towards your far smiling a bit “hey. You know Eddie parks for me when I drive places” you snapped playfully getting into the drivers seat practically speeding to Family Video.

It took less than 2 hours to find out where Eddie might be hiding, and somehow you had no idea to think of Rick until they had mentioned his name, thank god you knew where he lived though from the many trips over there you took with Eddie. It took yet another hour and a half to get there though, mainly because you and Dustin had to argue over the younger kids staying behind, which was an argument you gave into in the end. You parked outside slamming the car door rushing inside of the house “Eddie!?” You whisper yelled walking around, you knew Rick was out of town, and you also knew if you shoved the right spot in his door you could get in because of all of the times he was raided by police. Whenever you were met with eerily silence your heart sank, maybe he was hurt somewhere, you could hear the others searching the other areas, yelling for his name. It was like everytime you heard the shout of his name your eyes got even more cloudy than before, and before you knew it tears were running down your face. Jumping and turning around hopefully whenever you heard footsteps behind you, you were met with Steve’s compassionate look “Don’t cry, y/n” he mumbled hugging you tightly, any other time you would’ve laughed in Steve’s face, you knew after his and Nancy’s breakup he was basically a fuckboy, and yet you now accepted his hug crying into his chest “he’s probably just hiding somewhere else..this is only the first place we looked” he said rubbing your back, you just shook your head stepping back to wipe your face “Steve…he’s been missing since sometime last night..h-he told me it was just a deal and he’d be home by the time I got home this morning..Chrissy..the way she was when I saw her…if it was someone…how could Eddie still be out somewhere alive..” you whispered sniffling “well…I mean…they would’ve found his body or van by no-“ Steve was cut off by Max’s yell “hey guys!” Steve gives you an ‘I told you so’ look before you both rushed outside looking at what exactly Max was pointing her flashlight at, Rick’s shed door was slightly ajar “does Rick possibly always leave his shed unlocked?..” Dustin whispered looking towards you “I dunno! The times I was here it was chained locked shut but last time I rode with Eddie was like two or three months ago” you explained slowly walking towards the shed.

As you all managed to squeeze through the pry in the door you were met with even more eery silence, everything was untouched, obvious that someone had pried the door open but then not touch a single thing, while you peaked behind things and under things you scoffed at the other’s comments about the shed, but you had to admit it was fucking disgusting. Hearing a bag rustle harshly you turned around glaring at Steve who was jabbing inside of old boats with an oar “what are you doing?” Dustin asked harshly before stepping closer “what are you doing!?” He whisper yelled about to grab the oar that was still being jabbed into different storage bags. “Hey yea what the fuck are you doing?” You whispered stepping closer to them nodding at Dustin before Steve shifted starting to jab other tarps “what if he’s in here?” Steve whispered to you both sending a glare towards Dustin “so take the tarp off!” You both whisper yelled towards him “if you’re so brave you guys take the tarp off!” He whispered back to you, glaring at him you continued to look around trying to find any sign of Eddie staying here “hey look over here” max whispered looking at you and Robin, you walked over stepping over the clutter and mess, the smell of the shed kinda smelt like an abandoned building, furniture and other things just sitting in dust and other dirt and grime.

When you stopped your eyes lit up a bit and you almost started crying again, there were multiple beer bottles and food wrappers laid everywhere on the workbench “somebody was here” Robin whispered examining the wrappers “Eddie was here, that’s the only thing he’ll drink he says all the other beer tastes like shit” you whispered smiling as you looked around more “maybe he heard us pull up, got spooked and ran” Robin suggested looking towards Max “oh don’t worry! Steve will get him with his oar” Dustin joked, you sighed knowing that now if Eddie was in here he knew that Steve had an oar and could most likely hit him with it- “Steve. If you injury Eddie y/n’s most likely gonna kill you” Dustin said almost like reading your mind

“I know you think you’re being funny, Henderson but considering the fact that everybody in this room has nearly died about a hundred times personally I don’t find it funny-“ Steve screamed loudly as something jumped from under a tarp charging at him and shoving him against the wall pining him there “wait! Wait! Wait!” Steve screamed as Eddie held a broken beer bottle to Steve’s throat “hey! Hey!” Dustin yelled rushing towards Eddie stopping as he saw Eddie dig the sharp edge deeper almost cutting Steve “Eddie Munson if you hurt him watch if I don’t take my anger out on you for leaving without telling me Jack shit!” You screamed glaring at him shoving Dustin back walking closer to him “It’s y/n, Eddie. This is Steve, he’s not gonna hurt you, you know I won’t let that happen..” you said calmly trying to calm him down knowing that screaming is just gonna freak him out more. “Right..right..” he said gasping for air not wanting to press the glass into his skin any further than it was “Steve. I need you to drop the oar” Dustin said stepping forward a bit next to you just incase Eddie charged at you. Steve let out a shaky breath letting go of the oar letting it fall onto the ground with a couple loud knocks, you watched Eddie reposition glaring and push the bottle edge deeper, you weren’t gonna lie, seeing Eddie so angry was hot, but knowing the anger was just a mask to show his fear broke your heart. “He’s cool Ed! He’s cool I promise sweetheart I’m not gonna let him hurt you” you said loudly not wanting anybody to get hurt “what’re you doing here?” Eddie growled, his shaky voice tugging on your heart strings, he didn’t deserve this, you knew Eddie and you knew damn well he couldn’t hurt Chrissy, yes he loved you to the god damn moon and back but he still cared for Chrissy, she was the only one he knew really growing up who didn’t call him a freak and would’ve never killed her.

“We’re here to find you” Dustin said motioning to him “Eddie. These are Dustin’s friends, you know Robin…from..band” you said nervously motioning to the taller girl standing behind you “h-hello sir” Robin whispered slightly waving towards him “this is Max. Eddie you know Max she’s our neighbor..I used to live with her when I met you remember?-“ Dustin cut you off “the one who never wants to play dnd” he said looking at Eddie showing him his hands to let him know he’s not armed. “We’re on your side” he added growling to himself whenever Eddie still wouldn’t back off. “We’re on your side I swear on..my life!” You argued looking at him “right guys?” You asked watching Eddie just growl and dig the bottle deeper barely cutting Steve’s neck “shit! Shit!” You yelped looking at Dustin “I swear on my moms life!” He yelled “y-yeah, swear on Dustin’s mom” Steve whimpered, you watched Eddie jabbed the blade a bit before turning around, Steve rubbing his neck taking deep breaths to calm his heartbeat. Everybody sighed slowly trying to calm their own heart as Eddie slowly slid down the wall staring blankly at the floor, his hands shaking horribly, Dustin crouched in front of his holding his hand to keep you a couple feet back, you wanted to just shove the kid aside but you knew he just didn’t want you hurt and right know you couldn’t tell what was going on in your boyfriend’s head. Only now did you realize you had been crying again, wiping your face quickly as you knelt down looking at him as Dustin spoke “we just wanna help” he whispered reaching for the broken bottle retreating his hand back mumbling a small okay whenever Eddie pulled the bottle closer ready to jab it at anybody. “We just wanna know what happened Eddie..” You whispered slowly reaching towards him rubbing his shoulder lightly “you’re not gonna believe me” he whimpered looking at you tearing up “try us” Max said looking towards him, he looked up at her then back to you “guys…let me…have a minute with Ed..please” you asked scooting closer to him grabbing the bottle from his hand slowly slightly tugging it whenever he tried to tighten his grip on it, The others left, Dustin only giving slight protest to leaving you alone with Eddie in an unstable state but nonetheless he left standing guard outside the shed door incase you needed help.

“Eddie…sweetheart…Are you okay?..are you hurt?..” you whispered hugging him tightly feeling him relax his body in your hold, he smelt horrible, probably from staying in this nasty ass place “I-I didn’t do it..I-I swear I-I’d never hurt Chrissy” he whimpered holding onto you tightly like you’d somehow make all of this never happen “I know..I know bubs…I never thought you did..you’re too sweet of a person” you whispered moving his bangs to kiss his forehead, he slowly sat up looking at you cupping your cheeks, you rested your hands on his sighing “Ed…we need to know what happened…The cops…are most definitely looking for you right now…” you whispered softly, he just nodded letting you call the others back into the shed. He kissed you quickly and softly resting his forehead against yours “I’m sorry I left without leaving you anything to really..know..but..I was scared..” he whispered looking at you “I-I’m sorry” and just like that, every little spec of anger you felt towards Eddie for not telling you what was going on was gone, you just felt sadness for him.

After everybody got into the shed and seated Eddie sighed, starting to explain excatly what happened that night, from what he was doing with Chrissy in the first place to the second he left. “Her bones…” Eddie whimpered shaking his head stuttering trying to force himself to speak “her bones. Started to snap” he forced out looking away from you. “Her eyes…it was like something was inside, pulling..I-I didn’t know what to do…so…s-so I ran away…I left her there..” he whimpered his voice fading a telltale sign he was starting to cry, he quickly brought his hand to his face turning away “you all think I’m crazy don’t you?” He asked holding back a sob, his voice barely above a whisper. “No baby..we don’t think you’re crazy” you said looking at him, the others humming in agreement, you all jumped back when he started to yell not expecting his voice to go from so quiet to that loud “listen don’t bullshit me man! I know how it sounds!” He yelled his voice cracking and shaking any chance it got “we’re not bullshitting you” Max said sternly “we believe you” Robin chimed in looking at him as he scoffed and shook his head “okay..What I’m about to tell you…might a little difficult to take..” Dustin said sighing “when people say Hawkins is cursed..they’re not..that far off..there’s another world..hidden beneath Hawkins..sometimes it bleeds…into ours..” he explained, Eddie looking at Dustin almost intently “like…ghosts and shit…?” He asked “way worse..than ghosts..” max whispered.

You stayed with Eddie overnight, except you made him go inside Rick’s house to sleep, it wouldn’t be until the next day you saw the others again, you seemed to have been zoned out because you didn’t really take attention to anything until you were watching Steve be dragged underwater by something, you watched as Nancy jumped then Robin which left you and Eddie, you could heard police sirens and dog barking getting closer and your heart starting to race. “E-Eddie” you said watching the woods as he panicked on either staying in the boat or jumping into the water with whatever the hell pulled Steve down under. “Eddie” you said again turning towards him as he looked at you “what!?” He whispered yelled before you jumped into the water knowing he’d follow behind you, and he did, trying his best to swim next to you as you tried to find whatever the hell Steve was talking about and soon enough you did.

Dropping into the upside down was weird, it wasn’t dark but was hard to see, dust particles flying around everywhere and it wasn’t hard to find Steve and the others hiding under a rock. Once you both landed, Eddie almost making you into a pancake from how hard the fall was. You didn’t have time to groan in pain though because Nancy and the others started yelling as a swarm of some type of bats with tails started to attack both you and Eddie, the others screamed trying to run out and help you both but the bats wouldn’t stop, they just continued to swarm sinking their fangs into your’s and Eddie’s bodies, you couldn’t tell who’s screams were louder, yours, Eddie’s or your friends’s. For a split second you had thought to just use them, use the one thing you swore never to use again, you weren’t normal, not by a long shot, now you weren’t like El, you didn’t grow up in a lab, or be a lab rat all your life, but you did have something no doctor could explain, after an abusive upbringing one day whenever your dad went to beat you you used something not even you knew how it worked, until you started bouncing from foster home to foster home, using it almost anytime you were alone, testing it seeing how it worked.

You and Eddie put up a fight and for a moment you guys thought you had it, using the tails of the bats to slam them into the ground and kill them or at least injure them enough to stop attacking you, but it was like after one swarm died another was back, now swarming you, Eddie, and Robin, Nancy and Steve hiding under the rock protecting each other. You could see the moment Eddie gave up, he just turned to you and held your hand tightly, and the exact moment he gave up, you did too, feeling at least four bats bite into you at once you screamed in pain, letting your body fall and land on your knees you took a deep breath, closing your eyes, the familiar tingling sensation spread throughout your chest, fingers, and arms then a jolt almost like you were shocked with a shit ton of electricity at once. Everything went silent, just the panting of the others around you, your body shook, you could feel the warm blood going down over your lips, the dirt on the ground digging into your knees, and the weak tired feeling almost like your limbs were 50 pound sandbags. “Holy fucking shit! That was awesome!” Robin cheered jumping around as Eddie lifted you up off the ground onto your feet again “baby?…” he whispered cupping your cheeks gently lifting your head so you looked at him “was…was that..you?..” he asked “what?..” you asked slightly slurring your words, you had never used that much force, never in your life, your powers weren’t much different from El’s, you couldn’t move anything with your mind but you could send out short energy bursts, similar to telekinesis almost, you had never used that much energy before, the most you had ever used was whenever you had blown your step father through your living room wall. “That…that…giant blue..force it..fucking…obliterated everything around us…” he explained holding onto you tightly as he glanced around your surroundings, multiple buildings destroyed, some of the rock Nancy and Steve were hiding under was broken and chipped off, and there were multiple dead demon bats surrounding you, thousands of them. “I-I never wanted you to find out, Eddie…I-I don’t know…how…o-or…what-…I didn’t know how to explain it to you because I don’t know how to explain it myself” you whispered looking at him tearing up “I’m not mad…no no no…honey you just..you just saved us” he smiled looking at you “that was fucking awesome, don’t ever apologize for being like a..fucking sorcerer” he smiled looking at you trying to get a small smile out of you, since he had left and saw you again he barely saw you smile, and that was one of the things he loved and wanted to see 24/7. “You promise…you don’t..think I’m some…freak of nature?..” you asked holding onto his t-shirt tightly “oh baby” he sighed smiling at you placing a finger right between your eyes “don’t be so silly, silly, silly” he said tapping your forehead with each ‘silly’ he said “if you’re a freak baby then I guess I am one hell of a freak lover” he smiled, his smile growing even wider as you laughing shaking your head shoving him away by his face “how are you going to get out of here guys?” You asked looking at the others ready to get the hell out of wherever you guys were and get somewhere safe with Eddie.

[erodasfishtacos]

how about when they first noticed ezra was a nervous and anxious baby ?

Seperation

prompt: the moment when h and yn decide that Ezra needs to see a therapist.

warnings: angst

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enjoy 😊

—

It’s late at night, like 3 in the morning, and Harry was down in Atlanta for three games with the Braves.

Easton and Cash had long adjusted to their father being away for short spurts of time - doesn’t mean they don’t miss him but they know he’ll come back to them.

Ezra was another story.

YN felt dread anytime he went away for a game because her youngest got so anxious and had trouble sleeping.

He was usually okay during the day (Harry was gone for practice and obligations during most mornings and afternoons).

It was at night time.

She really didn’t want to call and bother her husband because he had just played a game that went into three innings of overtime and had gotten a gnarly bruise on his thigh from a ball hitting him as he batted.

When they’d FaceTimed after the game, about eight, he had been so exhausted in his hotel room that his eyes were nearly closing as he spoke to her.

Now at three, three in the morning, Ezra still hasn’t went to bed because of how fussy and tearful he was - babbling about his father.

“Daddy, daddy, daddy,” He was whining into his mother’s neck, his hot tears rolling down his cheeks and onto her skin.

“Ezzie, baby. We have to calm down. Mama’s here and daddy is okay, he’s just working,” She murmured to him for the hundredth time that night.

YN was sat in the den with him because she didn’t want him waking up his brothers or his little sister who just begun to sleep through the night for the most part.

At one point, she did stir for a night feeding, and as YN sat on her bed - Briar latched sleepily, Ezra was nestled tightly into her other side.

When it hit three-thirty, she began to feel herself get frustrated because she couldn’t fix the situation - no matter what she did.

She knew once tears began rolling down her own cheeks that she had to call Harry.

It was never that she was worried he would be mad that she called, she just felt guilty because he had worked so hard already that day.

YN reaches for her phone, taking a deep inhale before pressing his contact for facetime.

It rings three times before it’s picked up, completely dark in his room, and he rasps out drowsily, “Wha’s going on, mama? Y’alright? The babies alright?”

“I-I can’t get him to settle,” YN takes a deep breath, the sleep deprivation making her want to just break down and sob.

“Daddy? Daddy, daddy, daddy,” Ezra just chants, eyes wide on the screen, searching for his father to just appear but all he sees is darkness.

That causes him to just start bawling his eyes out when he can’t will his father onto the phone like he wants.

“Whoa, Ezzie. Sweet boy, c’mon. Y’gotta breathe s’daddy can understand you,” Harry coos, stirring to turn on the light and illuminate his pillow-creased face.

“Daddy!” His voice is shrill, high-pitched and it makes YN’s ears ring.

“Ezra Duke,” Harry says a little more firmly, “Daddy can’t understand you when you scream, okay?”

The little boy sniffles and tries to catch his breath, leaning into where YN is rubbing soothing circles into his back.

“Miss you,” His son whimpers sadly, bringing his voice down a notch, “Come home, please.”

“I am flying’ home tomorrow, bab. Daddy will be home around noon but you have to be good for mama,” He says, voice still smooth and calm.

“Now!” Ezra screams in a way he usually never does and then continues, “Now! Now daddy! Now!”

Both parents are taking aback, Harry with wide eyes and parted lips as he watching his son through his phone and YN just squeezes her eyes shut, exhaling out of her mouth.

“Mama, breathe,” Harry directs towards her, can tell how overwhelmed she is getting from all the chaos of his screaming.

“Daddy, daddy,” Ezra blubbers, green eyes angry and anxious at the same time, “Please, home!”

YN hears noise from behind her, to see her eight year old padding into the room with his unruly curls poking every which way.

“Mama, is Ezzie okay?” Easton wonders, knuckling his eyes sleepily and then Cash follows right behind him in his dinosaur pajamas.

“Fuck, he woke up the boys,” YN informs Harry tearfully, “I just…I don’t know what to do. I can’t do anything to make him feel better.”

The older boys peek into the screen to smile at their dad and Harry gives them a tense smile, “Hi boys, I know Ez is being loud but can y’two be good f’your mama and go back to bed?”

They agree, giving their upset brother a kiss and then their mom before talking quietly to each other as they walk up the stairs.

“Daddy? Home, please! Hold me!” Ezra wails, clinging to his mother’s neck tightly enough to hurt as he tantrums.

“This is the worst it’s ever been, he’s normally stopped before I’ve had to call you,” YN groans, rocking him swiftly against her for lack of a better idea.

“Wait…” Harry sits up, scrubbing a hand over his puffy face, “Has this been happening’ every time m’away?”

“It just started two to three months ago but he’s always been able to be calmed down within an hour or so,” YN replies, shushing Ezra as he babbles over and over again daddy, daddy, daddy.

Harry’s jaw tightens and his frown settles into a deep crease, “Well why a’ve you not told me that m’baby has been cryin’ for me when I’m gone? Do y’not think that’s important?”

YN recognizes his irritation and is running on less than five hours of sleep over two days and may he’s it back with an even sharper tone.

“We can’t change that you’re gone. I’m trying to handle it, Harry.”

“Y’not doin’ a bloody good job at it!” Harry bites back in frustration, heart pounding in desperation as he hears his son cry for him.

“Daddy, daddy, come on.”

Then YN looks at him with watering, hurt eyes, “I’m doing my best. You’re not here, I can’t make you appear. I’m trying to calm him down without having to wake you up.”

And Harry shouldn’t but he’s angry and misses his babies - all of them but especially the one who needs him the most right now.

“Y’dont think I deserve to know tha’ Ezra’s been acting like this?” Harry snaps before adding, “In this situation, y’best isn’t good enough because he’s still crying and y’still haven’t been able to settle him.”

And wow, those words hit her like a ton of bricks. It was instilling all the insecurities that she had bubbling in her chest.

In this situation, y’best isn’t good enough because he’s still crying and y’still haven’t been able to settle him.

Harry automatically knows that he spoke before he thought and he let his stressed out mind say untrue hurtful things.

He part his lips about to speak before YN cuts him off.

“If you can do it so much better than me, fucking good you. Then come home and fix this because I give up,” YN laughs without humor, finger finding the red button to hang out and disconnecting.

Harry tried calling back over and over and over but YN just hangs her head, sniffling, as she watches her tired, anxious little son finally drift off to sleep.

At some point, her phone stops ringing when he’s given up and it doesn’t ring again until for another thirty minutes.

She knew he was going to keep calling until she picked up - had been that way since they first started dating.

By now, Ezra was asleep in his room and YN was sat against their headboard - having tossed the tear soaked shirt she had on off and was feeding Briar once more.

The millionth facetime request comes through and finally she swipes to answer, he’s furious right as they connect, “D’you have any idea how worried I am? Y’cant ju-“

He stops himself when he sees his baby girl pop her head from her mother’s breast with puffy lips and look at the screen, “Dadadadada.”

“Oh, hi lil’ mama,” Harry changes his tone completely, face softening - “Did I interrupt y’eatin’? S’mama being so nice and feeding you?”

Briar just smiles with a gapped baby tooth smile, a dimple pushing into her left cheek as she does so.

“Guess I’m good for one thing, right? A fucking milk-maker,” YN scoffs at her husband’s opposite tone as she guides Briar gently back down to finish her meal.

Harry frowns, “Y’know tha’s not anything near the truth and tha’ I think you’re the best mama to our babies. M’just upset.”

“You told me my best wasn’t good enough, I can’t believe you would say something like tha’ to me,” YN begins to sniffle again.

“Sweetheart, m’sorry. I ju-“

“What did you call for, Harry? It’s nearly four-thirty in the morning and I haven’t slept for nearly two days now. I want to feed her and go to sleep,” YN’s voice is disconnected and exhausted.

“To talk, I didn’t say how I was feeling correctly-“

“When you come home tomorrow you can fix everything and I’ll let you because I’m not doing a good enough job,” His wife cuts him off again.

Harry starts to feel a ball of worry form in his throat as he hears how unemotional and distance his wife sounds with him.

He had totally said the wrong things as his wife was just trying to do her best at balancing four babies while he was away.

“Please, let me apologize-“

“I would like to go to sleep. Please don’t call back,” YN responds before ending the phone call and leaving the screen dark.

They rarely ever fought. Especially like this.

He’s man enough to admit that he cries after he tries calling back (even though she said not to) and it went straight to voicemail.

-

He tries facetiming in the morning, at around nine right before if flight takes off - surprised when it actually was picked up.

Harry only sees YN for a brief moment before she’s propping up the camera on the kitchen table so that Easton and Cash are in view eating pancakes and Briar is in her high chair with blueberries staining her chubby cheeks.

Ezra must still be in bed.

“Hi bubbies,” Harry greets with a smile as they’re curls shake as they look up with excited smiles.

“Daddy! You comin’ home?” Cash squeaks excitedly through a mouthful of food.

“Hi dad!” Easton chimes in, waving.

Briar is only half-interested, more taken by the fact that if she squishes the berries between her fingers they turn mushy, babbles out a, “Daddadaa.”

“I’ll be home in like three hours, ‘kay” Harry informs them - his heart aches to be there right now with theme

“Ezzie cried all night,” Cash let’s his father know.

“Mama cried too,” Easton whispers, like it’s a secret that he doesn’t want her to hear, “I think she is really sad.”

Harry squeezes his eyes shut for a minute, “I know. Ezzie was sad last night. Can I talk to mama?”

Easton looks to his mother off camera as she must say something to him to repeat to Harry, “Mama said that she is busy and she’ll see you when you get home.”

He clenches his fist off camera, trying to smile but he knows it’s terse as he says, “Alright, I love you all. See y’when I get home.”

-

Meanwhile, YN gets all the children settled after breakfast.

Easton, Cash, and Ezra in the backyard - the two older ones digging holes for bugs and the younger playing in the sandbox.

Briar was snoozing in the cradle of YN’s elbow as she sat on a chaise - watching the kids.

She hits the number she was looking for, waiting for it to ring, and then she hears, “Hillside Pediatrics, this is Jess.”

The office knew the family well because Harry is Harry Styles and they have four children who visit there.

YN inquires about therapeutic options for him, resources, and if they had any recommendations for where to take him.

Like the super mom she is, she manages to set up an intake appointment that evening (which was a miracle on its own), call Anne and ask to watch the other children, and then take a deep breathe.

Harry steps through the back door, dressed in his usual Yankees hoodie, Nike shorts, and trainers looking tanner than before.

“Hi bubbies!” He greets, basking in when all of his children look up and squeal excitedly at the sight of their father.

Easton and Cash are the fastest, racing to cling to each legs and nuzzle into his thigh with a tight hug.

Ezra is slower, by the time he’s arrived to his father - there was no room for him to shuffle in and he automatically lets out an earth-shattering wail.

Just like before.

“Daddy! Hold me! Daddy, hold me please!” His youngest son begs desperately, stretching up his arms, and letting hot tears stream down his cheeks.

Harry tuts, reaching for him and popping him on his hip but Ezra has other ideas - scrambling until his nose is pressed into the curve of Harry’s neck with his arms wrapped tightly around him.

“Ezzie, c’mon now,” Harry titters softly, reaching down to give both of his other boys a kiss on the head before they dart back off to play.

“Daddy, miss you,” Ezra blubbers sadly, Harry wincing when his son yanks a bit in his longer curls by the nape of his neck.

“Y’okay, daddy’s got you. Relax, breathe bubba,” His father reassured him, swaying softly back and forth until he’s just sniffing.

“We have an appointment with a children’s play therapist for him later at five,” YN tells him, shushing Briar who’s squeaking from the noise.

Harry takes a deep inhale, “Okay, that sounds like a good idea. Can we talk now since y’been ignoring my calls?”

YN bristles at the attitude in his tone, “Excuse me if I’d rather not be critiqued on my skills as a mother when I am sleep-deprived and stressed out.”

He clenches his jaw, speaking lowly with firmness, “Y’bein’ absurd! I didn’t critique to you, y’blowing things out of proportion! Y’the one who didn’t tell me this was going on!”

“It didn’t get that bad until last night! I could handle it - he would just be upset for a little before bed but he’d never got that anxious before,” She justifies, returning the glare he’s giving her.

“Didn’t think y’could mentioned it to me? I have a right to know, he’s m’baby too. I could have fix this yet you were letting him suffer,” Harry bites out but know as soon as it’s out of his mouth that he wishes he could swallow the words back down.

You were letting him suffer.

YN doesn’t even argue back, just starts bawling because of how hurtful those words were and how could he even say that?

“Mama, fuck- I didn’t, I’m just-“

His wife gets up without a word, using Briar’s blanket to wipe at her wet cheeks, and vanishing through the sliding back doors.

Ezra was snoozing peacefully on him and he couldn’t leave the boys outside alone so he resorts to sitting down on one of the outdoor couches and curse internally.

He couldn’t believe he was being so cruel. He just felt so….betrayed that she hadn’t told him what had been going on and he felt like he was letting down Ezra.

It was a nasty feeling of guilt in the pit of his stomach because he was away so much from his family and it was stressful for everyone.

He wanted to cry at the idea of his son crying for him every night.

-

Harry starts to get anxious when YN isolates herself in their bedroom with Briar for the next upcoming hours.

He knocks softly, opening the door to YN turned on her side away from him, under the covers, with Briar asleep in her bassinet asleep.

“Mama? Y’awake?” Harry murmurs cautiously with a sandwich and chips since she’d disappeared and hadn’t been down once, water in the other hand.

“Are the boys okay?” YN asks quietly, not bothering to turn over to face him.

“Yes, babies are fine. They’re watchin’ Toy Story right now, eatin’ lunch,” Harry replies, eyes falling in his beautiful little daughter.

“If the boys are fine then I don’t want you in here,” YN tells him with an angry tone but low enough that it won’t disturb Briar.

Harry nearly whimpers.

“Baby, please. We need to talk-“

“If the boys are fine, I want you to leave me alone.”

Harry hesitates by the door, feeling helpless as he slips the plate onto the dresser in case she is hungry but he doubts she’ll touch it.

“Alright, I’ll leave y’be. Call me if y’need anythin’ or help with Briar,” He offers, trying to buy time in the room.

She laughs sarcastically, “Yeah, I’ll make sure you’re notified because I can’t do a good enough job myself.”

Harry sighs, running a hand through his hair, trying to conjure up the perfect words to fix this situation but it’s interrupted.

“Daddy? Daddy? Where? Hold me!” Ezra screeches as Easton stands outside the door with him, holding his hand.

“Dad, he won’t stop,” The oldest complains with annoyance as Ezra scurries to his father and up into his arms.

“Daddy daddy,” He chants into his father’s skin with relief.

“Thank y’East, Ezzie’s been sad lately. Huh?” Harry replies, thumbing at Easton’s cheek.

The oldest shrugs, “Not always. Mama cheers him up all the time with kisses and hugs.”

Harry gazes back to the lump under the blankets and feels himself getting choked up. He really really regretted his words.

He didn’t regret being upset with her. He regrets the cheap shots he took at his wife who’s just trying to be a full time mom to his babies.

“Mama?” Ezra squeaks at the word, realizing he hasn’t seen her recently and then he’s back to tantruming, “Mama, mama, mama. Where’s mama?”

“M’right here, Ez,” YN murmurs, flipping to her other side so that her youngest could see her. His face lights up and he scurries to the bed, scampering up until his mom is tucking him under the blankets with her.

Harry’s heart aches when Ezra whimpers quietly and burrows into her warm chest with happiness that he found his mother.

“Y’got him?” Harry asks, hand raking through Easton’s curls as he leans into his father’s side.

“Can we go play now, dad?” Easton asks impatiently, tugging his father out of the room and down the staircase.

-

Anne shows up and the two older ones are so excited, bouncing up and down as they tug her into the backyard to show her the holes they dug with Briar popped on her hip - gnawing on her shirt collar.

YN brings Ezra down the stairs, curls tamed with a bit styling mousse and a little adias x disney outfit that was the cutest thing ever. ***

Harry reaches out to take Ezra off YN but he whines and shakes his head, clinging to his mother like it was life or death.

“No daddy! Mama!” Ezra pouts angrily, glaring at his father with protectiveness.

He puts his hands up, “Okay, okay. Y’can stay with y’mama.”

-

The car ride is silent, Harry doesn’t know what to say and YN isn’t giving him anything to work with. He feels like he’ll just say the wrong thing again.

When they pull up to the building and Harry puts it in park, he’s startled when his wife just starts bawling into her hands.

Harry freezes for a second with wide eyes before rumbling, “Mama, sweetheart. Please don’t cry, it breaks m’heart, darlin’.”

“I’m…I’m no-not a good mom,” YN cries, “I wanted to tell you but I was scared. I don’t want you to think I can’t handle raising our babies.”

Harry pries her hands away from her face, cupping her cheeks and firmly staring, full conviction in his voice, “If I didn’t think y’could handle four babies then I wouldn’t have put them in you. I wouldn’t talk about putting more in you.”

YN’s eyes are watering, letting Harry swipe the tears away with his thumbs as she inhales deeply, “I am so so sorry I didn’t tell you. I don’t want you to worry when you’re away.”

Harry leans forward, kissing her harshly before whispering against her lips, “I don’t give a fuck about baseball in comparison to you and the kids. I’d give it up this second if y’asked. I want to worry because you’re the love of m’life and I’m y’husband - I’m here to support you and support our family.”

He continues, “I am a bit frustrated with you. I want you to tell me everything I miss when I’m gone even if it stresses me out or upsets me. Okay? But I shouldn’t have said hurtful things. You’re the best mama on this planet and y’treat our babies the best.”

YN nods, willing herself to stop crying as their appointment starts in ten minutes as she takes steady breathes.

“I forgive you. I’m sorry I let my pride get in the way. I just…I feel like you do everything for us and the least I could do is manage the kids,” She sighs with self-deprecation.

“Mama, just because one of our bubs needs therapy doesn’t mean you’re not doing a perfect job. We’ve always know Ezzie was an anxious baby. This is going to be good for him and for us, right?” He encourages, nosing at her cheek before she offers up her lips once more for a short kiss.

“I love you,” YN tells him, running a thumb of a light dusting of stubble on his jawline.

“Love y’more than anything,” He replies instantly.

-

Ezra is nervous as they step into the calming, peaceful office where there are neatly organized buckets of toys and shelves of books.

Patricia was a middle-aged woman with a kind smile who welcomed them in, she observed how Ezra had himself wrapped around his dad with hesitant green eyes peeking at her.

As they sit down, Patricia says softly, “This must be Ezra?”

They all wait for a moment before the toddler turns around to look at the woman and says timidly, “m’Ezzie.”

“Hi Ezzie,” The therapist greets and he gives her a cautious smile before nuzzling back into his father’s neck.

The discuss what has been going on. How Ezra has always been very nervous, anxious, cautious in a way that none of his other siblings are.

How he struggles when one of his parents is away from him, how he can get upset if he can’t find one of his siblings, or how much he worries about things most kids his age don’t worry about.

Patricia does an excellent job in calming down the parents, assuring them that it was nothing out of the norm, and that therapy would be beneficial for him.

She states that they’ll work a lot of feelings - being able to describe and recognize them. That will be one of the most important things.

Also working on his ability to calm down and cope with stressful situations, recommending once a week which of course his parents agreed to.

By the end of the intake, Ezra had ventured to take one of the baby dolls from a bin and bring it back to his father.

“Look daddy, s’a baby,” He lisps proudly, holding it up to show him.

“Good job, bubs,” Harry laughs, leaning to kiss his forehead - watching him toddle off to find more dolls to play with.

-

That night, after all the kids go to bed, and YN is finishing her final feeding with Briar in her nursery before putting in her crib.

Harry runs a nice, steaming bath with lavender bubbles and a candle burning with the lights dimmed low.

When she finds him, he slowly undresses her with warm kisses and praises of how good of a wife and mother she is.

They lay in there together, YN between his legs with her head rested on his chest, as his hands massage at her tummy and hips lovingly.

And yeah, everything is okay after that.

They get up the next day and everything is back to normal except now Ezra goes to therapy once a week with his parents.

(Ezra ends up working with Patricia until he’s in about sixth grade.)