#and I think it's going well! I like fishing but am less fond of mining in game

[tj-crochets]

I got absolutely zero crafting done today because I was busy trying not to panic about being under a tornado watch (it's over with no tornadoes, all good now), playing Stardew Valley, and getting sidetracked by discussions about human teeth plushies here on tumblr, but crafting updates should hopefully resume tomorrow! I do have a baby blanket almost done I'll probably be able to finish tomorrow, I just haven't taken any progress pictures

[handy-dandy-monster-candy]

Ruathym, part Three

Rating: NSFW Length: 2272 Pairing: Male Drider x GN Reader

The finale for the romance for @kim-monsterlings!

xxx

Much to your surprise, Ruathym gives you space. There are fewer summons and the spies make themselves ever scarcer, until you could swear there were long stretches of time in which you were truly alone. Even more surprising, you found yourself becoming restless and ill-tempered in these moments, losing your patience with even Tinki. (Of course, you make it up to the little, well-meaning creature; spiders, you learn, are surprisingly good at puppy-dog eyes.)

“You’ve been snapping at the staff left and right,” Ruathym says with no small amount of amusement some days later, braiding your hair down your scalp. It’s gotten longer, you realise, and you contemplate cutting it before your captor speaks. “Have I displeased you in some way?”

Yes, you wish to say, but you’re sure that the King has done nothing wrong. Not truly. “No,” you say instead, though it sounds unconvincing to your own ears.

“Hm,” hums Ruathym, tugging gently at your hair in admonishment. “With the way you’ve been acting, one might get the impression that you dislike being far from my side.” You twitch and he laughs, triumphant. “Is that it, my little bug? Have you come to crave the pull of my silk?”

“I wish you wouldn’t mock me,” you grouse, sighing heavily. “It reminds me why I prefer my own company.”

Ruathym chuckles, fingertips skating along the skin of your back before he picks you up and cradles you against him in his four arms. “I thought humans needed time to mourn their losses,” he says, searching your face with something sharper in his eyes than his usual derision. “I’m no reader of minds, my sweet. You must tell me if you have want of me.”

You scoff. You can’t help it. When has being vulnerable ever served you well? You almost bite his fingers when he turns your face to look into your eyes, sighing once again in your defeat. “And if I do?” you challenge, lifting your proud chin. “What of it?”

“Then you shall become my consort,” says Ruathym, with a simple frankness that flabbergasts you.

“Your—what?” you gasp, distantly aware that your lips are flapping like a fish on the docks.

“Do try not to make me repeat myself,” Ruathym replies in exasperation, pinching your chin. “My consort. My lover. Whatever you humans call those of our stations in courtship.”

“But I’m human!” you splutter, struggling to sit up straighter in his arms.

“I’m aware,” drawls Ruathym, helping you get your bearings—at least physically. “Did you think I was sleeping with you because you disgusted me?”

“I…” You don’t have the words. You don’t know what you thought, but it definitely wasn’t this. “You think I’m attractive?”

“What did I just say about making me repeat myself?”

You huff, scowling up into his handsome, angular face. “You wouldn’t be. I want answers, not riddles.”

Ruathym snorts indelicately, one of his few habits that doesn’t come with some modicum of damnable grace. “Yes, I find you attractive. No one else has the audacity to speak to me the way that you do. I find it thrilling.”

“You mean you like it when I’m cruel.” You frown. “That’s not what I’m after. I don’t want to be cruel to my lover. If you want to court me, you do it right.”

Ruathym carefully sets you down on the bed, curling his legs up under himself and draping his humanoid torso across plump, velvety pillows. “Teach me what humans do ‘right’, then,” he commands, gesturing for you to speak.

You flounder for a moment; this was not how you expected your evening to go. “We… We court,” you say dumbly, gesticulating helplessly. “We exchange gifts of trinkets and flowers, we write one another letters, we—well, usually there’s pining involved, I suppose.”

“How dull,” sighs the King, watching you beneath his thick, silvery lashes. “Driders kill for their lovers.”

The weight of his words isn’t lost on you. You think of your brother and his knights—of the entirety of the kingdom laid to waste at your feet. You feel lightheaded, blood creeping up your neck and up into your face. You have to resist the urge to hide from the slow, smug smirk of satisfaction that melts onto the Drider King’s face. Damn the man. Had he been courting you in his own way this entire time? Damn him!

“What about the Queen?” you ask, hedging around the obvious revelation and latching onto one of your more prominent doubts.

Ruathym blinks hard, clearly startled. “What about her?”

“You’re married,” you say, “and she hates me. Won’t she want me dead once she realises her lover’s attention has strayed?”

The King laughs, hard and loud, throwing his head back with his mirth and revealing his fangs. “She’s never loved me a day in her life,” he manages to gurgle after several seconds of laughter, “and the feeling is mutual. We married for politics and to spawn strong children. That’s all. If she so much as schemes to harm a hair on your head, I will kill her or die trying.”

“Ruathym!”

“What? Does it shock you? I protect what is mine, little bug, and you are what I wish to possess in your entirety.”

You bristle at this, though you curse your stupid heart for fluttering in your chest like a tizzied moth. “I’m not a thing, Ruathym. You can’t possess me. Either you love me, or our arrangement remains the same.”

Ruathym shrugs an elegant shoulder, expression shifting into something bordering on thoughtful. “What is love to a human may not be love to a drider, little one. I want you, more than I’ve ever wanted anything in my life. Is that not love? I would kill you before I allowed you to court another. Is that not love? I would lay down my life to protect you. Is that not love, this powerful, ugly thing?”

You don’t know what to say to this. You want to object, but your heart is pounding too loudly, your thoughts are too muddled. Never has someone felt so strongly about you, and while your feelings are conflicted, you can’t deny that there’s something intoxicating about the King and his firm command of you in and out of the bedchambers.

Courtship with Ruathym is… interesting. He sends you poisonous flowers at first for their beauty, unaware that their very touch could kill you. When you correct him, he expresses his disdain for human frailty, but then he sends for roses and takes the care to have their thorns removed so as to avoid any chance of injury. It’s excessive and obnoxious, but it’s endearing in its own way, even if you’ve never been particularly fond of roses. Still, each bouquet is a different colour paired with different complimentary flowers, and you begin to look forward to your weekly deliveries with something like anticipation.

Then there are the letters.

As expected, Ruathym’s lettering is swooping and elegant, more reminiscent of ornamental calligraphy than what one would use for writing to a lover. Still, each letter holds within it a terribly sweet awkwardness that lets you know that he’s never written a letter out of love in the whole of his life. He’s strangely formal at first, addressing you by all of your names in the greetings of his first few letters, but it isn’t long before he’s dropping them all in favour of addressing you as he does in person. It makes your heart flutter oddly in your chest to see ‘little bug’ written in such beautiful, glittering script, shimmering silver on charcoal grey parchment.

Soon, they become less letters and more little notes delivered on scraps here and there. Tiny doodles of advisors dying terrible deaths done in the throes of boredom, or tidbits of trivia from the kingdom at large. Did you know we had 5,363 cattle in the region of the L’Surba Caverns? Neither did I know nor care, one says, and you snort into your tea at the thought of the King sitting proudly while some poor sod with an abacus counted out their livestock from the sum of several reports. While you missed the weight of your crown, you did not exactly miss all of the bureaucracy attached to it.

He takes you on little outings, here and there. At first it’s a simple stroll through the gardens, sharing meals and speaking about your days. Then, as you both grow bolder, outings to meet—or, in his case, intimidate—the people. Finally, with glamours and enchantments, you take to the countryside for days at a time, disguised as a couple or adventurers on a quest. It’s during these outings that you get to know him best, away from the bustle of the castle, where his impetuous charm and rakish smiles lure you to him like a moth to flame, and you crash and burn in his heated embrace.

One evening many months later, you are summoned to a part of the palace that you rarely frequent, for it is usually crawling with servants and vassals of every kind. Now, however, the halls are quiet and still, and the servant who leads you to the chamber where Ruathym awaits disappears like a whisper in the dark. There, in the centre of the room, is a set of robes unlike any you’ve ever seen, woven in shimmering silk dyed the colour of rubies. You approach as if in a dream, running your fingers along embroidery in the shape of tiny silver spiderlings along the shoulders and hems—you nearly jump out of your skin when the King drapes himself across your back.

“What is this?” you whisper, looking over your shoulder at his soft, searching face.

“Your wedding attire,” he says, and he seems unperturbed when you draw away, stunned.

“My what? Your wife!”

“Is dead,” Ruathym simply replies, shaking his head at your unasked question. “We had a clutch of eggs. She went the natural way. The children feed on her yet.”

You grimace at this, though you can’t deny the relief you feel at her passing. “You’re a father now?”

“I am. You will also be their parent, when we wed.”

“‘When’? You’re assuming I’ll accept!”

“Would you deny me?” he asks sharply, eyes narrowing into gleaming slits.

Your stomach flips. “Well,” you say, flustered and at a loss. “This is all so sudden, Ruathym!”

“Is it really?” he asks, reeling you in against him again. “We’ve posed as newlyweds before. Why is it so different now?”

“Because it’s real now! We wouldn’t be pretending!”

“Who says that I was pretending before?” he demands, trapping you between his body and the robe on the mannequin. “It was practise.”

You feel your face burning, and you’re sure you might blend into the robe at your back if given just a little more provocation. “You despicable little—“

“Yes, yes, call me names,” he says, waving away your insults. “Later. Give me your answer now.”

“You know my answer,” you grumble, pushing ineffectively at his chest.

“I know it,” he confirms, smugness in every syllable. “I wish to hear it.”

You kiss him instead, drawing him into a passionate embrace and climbing up into his arms when he lifts you off your feet. You hadn’t seen the bed in the corner of the room, but that’s where he takes you a moment later, tossing your “irritating human clothing” over the edge of it and onto the floor. You expect him to bend you over the pillows. You expect him to claw at your skin, to bite at your shoulders, to whisper filth into your ears.

He kisses you instead.

He kisses you like neither of you have ever borne a crown—as if he could find the answers in the hazing of your eyes when he steals your breath with his tongue, hands in your hair and burning along your spine. He teases you open with his fingers until you’re reduced to begging for release, and then he presses into you with soft, shuddering breaths spilling from his lips, eyes on your face as you toss your head back into the sheets and writhe.

He sighs your name like a psalm when you come around him, and then he pushes into you again and again, his cool fingers threading between yours and holding you firmly against the bed as you shake apart beneath him. You feel something in your chest unbreak when he bites you without fang, staying present for every moment that his lips brush against yours and your name falls into the pool of heat between you.

This time, when he comes, he shatters like a shower of glass and sparks, cresting against you like a wave and pushing you over the edge all over again, throat trapped desperately—willingly—between his teeth. When your eyes focus again, you find him looking down at you with a tenderness you’d never thought him capable of, and it makes you want to hide. “What?” you whisper up at him, trying and failing to tug a bit of the sheets over your body.

“I love you, little bug,” Ruathym whispers back, tracing your lips with his thumb. “I have done and will do so until this heart in my chest stops beating.”

“That’s so dark,” you say, “for a declaration of love.”

“It is my declaration, and I am not a man of light. Would you deny me?”

“No,” you breathe, shyly reaching up to touch his face. “I love you, too.”

Ruathym smiles, and despite his words, it lights up the room. “I know.”

You snort. “Bastard.”

“I know that, too.”

[funkymbtifiction]

Finding my Si: a submission

I’d like to share 6 things that helped me discover my Si and how Charity’s advice helped me, in case it helps anyone else :)

1.It helps when friends and family tell you what they think your dominant function is. Like a fish not realizing the water is wet, it’s so normal that it’s invisible to you. My mum picked Si the minute I asked her which function described me best; she said, ‘You trust your personal experiences and refer back to them all the time; it’s like an anchor for you. You rely on the past to get you through the present.’ One by one, my friends picked the same, pointing to how I recollect everything from the date we first met to changes in their food preferences to the color of the shirt they wore one Monday morning. I never realized the enormity of the storehouse of detail in my head until they pointed out that not everyone treasures memory-keeping in the same way. I wouldn’t say Si memory is photographic; for me, it’s more like a fisherman’s net, where I gather in what matters to me. I see a living mosaic of past and present when I look at people and places I love.

2. Being willing to question my own assumptions. An unflinching look at what I actually do, not what I think I do.

I considered Ni when I thought of goals I’ve set. For example, I got into the same UK university at 18 that I’d loved at age 14. This story initially sounded as though I’d had a clear future vision, and never let go of the dream (Ni). However, I’d left out winding twists and turns in between. At 16, I was captivated by a Canadian university and considered going there for a while; at 17, I considered studying in New York. Eventually, I applied to a bunch of unis and got an offer from the original ‘dream one’ in England. It was the best offer and I’d remained fond of it, so I wound up going. I was pleased, but I’d been open to other unis and happy to go to them too. After reading the perspective of actual Ni-users on their laser-sharp vision, I realized mine wasn’t as unwavering, intense and single-minded.

Instead, I realized that the reason I treasure this story -  'I visited my uni when I was just a kid and then got to go there for good!’ - is that I liked being able to link my childhood self and adult self. I enjoy connecting the past and present and spotting continuity and change ('Back then, I did this…now I still do this…and I don’t do this….’). My mind always traces back to how things were, which spills over into dinner-table family conversations ('Do you remember when…?’/'You know how we used to…?’). I realized that this type of personal mythologizing and cherishing a living past is Si. I can set goals and work meticulously in a step-by-step IFJ way, but it is not a dominant personality trait in the strikingly single-minded, futuristic, visionary way that is Ni. For anyone considering Ni, I recommend looking up mbti-notes and Charity’s explanations here, as it is a very complex function and it helps to understand exactly how it works.

3. Painful honesty. Confronting flaws isn’t fun. However, as Charity says, it helps to think of pairs (Si-Ne, Ne-Si or Ni-Se) rather than functions in isolation.

I tried to determine which flaw I could most relate to: inferior Te, inferior Se, or inferior Ne.

I couldn’t identify with inferior Te because I’ve always been a careful planner and organizer; even my third-grade report cards said, ‘She loves being efficient and organizing her little space!’ Today, I have multiple administrative responsibilities at work and genuinely enjoy it. There’s something about streamlining systems and attending to details that feels satisfying (dorky, I know). I could not relate to inferior Se either, as sensory engagement has always been a big part of my life. Whether it’s dancing or nature hikes or cooking, hands-on hobbies have always been so core to me that I often find myself feeling one with the natural environment, rather than uncomfortable with it. I haven’t had reckless moments characteristic of inferior Se. But inferior Ne - those descriptions embarrassed me.

As Charity says, if something makes you go ‘ouch’, it might hit the nail on the head.

I thought I had good Ne because I can see multiple perspectives. But this is more a 9 and 2 influence ('Staying open-minded helps to understand people, help them, and resolve conflict’) and a skill honed through my job in peace-building. What trips me up are the problems plaguing inferior Ne users. Newness and novelty feels hard. My 9 probably plays into it, but in general I am not good at out of the box thinking and brainstorming dozens of different approaches. Despite my 2-9 positive outlook, I usually feel fearful of the unknown and find it difficult to speculate or imagine possibilities in the uncertain future.

4. It helps to see where your attention goes. When I teach and review students’ essays, I’ll start leaving comments about their word-choice in paragraph 3; the evidence they used on page 2; how their argument on page 12 risks contradicting their logic on page 10, etc. I can hold these details in my head with ease, suggest a clear structure, and spot incongruities, but I have to consciously remind myself to zoom out to comment on the overarching ideas in the work.

On the other hand, I notice when I do something creative or abstract because it’s not really what I do on a day to day basis. When I first began researching MBTI, I found it easy to recall the last metaphor I imagined because it stood out in my mind. But determining frequency helped. Not just how I think, but how often I think that way. Ne is a ‘play’ function for me - on good days, it’s a whimsical scribble in a poetry journal, occasional daydreams, self-improvement books on my shelf.

5. Being able to tease out finer differences in cognition. I got interested in a Royal Family controversy recently. I thought I was using Ni because I mused on the consequences for the nation (in a Ni-Fe way). However, I realized I was less interested in future possibility and more interested in what was helpful for interpersonal understanding (Fe/2-9) and how the country could preserve the traditions and culture built up over centuries (Si). Rather than preferring to look ahead and predict what would happen (Ni). It’s a fine line, but it helped to think: how often is my cognition located in the future vs the past? Which one feels more natural? Is it an Enneagram or an MBTI influence at play?

6. Avoiding sensor bias. I felt I must be an intuitive because I do engage in abstract conversation sometimes. It’s just that my topics of choice come from my Enneagram 269 tritype. How can schools treat children better? What can we do to promote community mental health? What keeps kids safer? My job is centered around people’s welfare, and I’d be happy to discuss theories of human psychology or relationships or mental health because I’m very absorbed in my little niche of knowledge. However, concrete applications interest me most, and I am not likely to start conversations about, say, 18th century theology or automated cars or space travel. My INFP and INFJ friends seem interested in a much wider range of philosophical conversation.

I agree with a post on this blog that pointed out that modern psychology now understands traits not as bimodal distributions (X or Y) but along a spectrum (how much of X? How much of Y?). People differ in where they lie along the spectrum. I’d say I’m close to the middle. My biggest tell that I lean towards sensing is when I look through philosophy books on human well being. Even though the topic reflects my interests, I’m quickly bored by too much theory. I’m happy to thrash out an idea with a friend, but it needs to be animated by real-life examples and practical applications for me to stay interested.

Above all, I recommend observing where your heart leads. Much of my free time goes into journal-writing, old albums, and time capsules. Detail-driven memory-keeping fulfills me deeply, and it was this deep joy that proved most helpful for recognizing my Si :)

[hopelikethemoon]

Soul || (Ezra x Reader) || Moonbeams

Title: Soul Rating: PG-13 Length: 4,300 Warnings: Mild angst  Notes: Why am I always so nervous to post every chapter? Part nine of the Moonbeams series.

Taglist: @princessbatears @djarin-junk @absurdthirst @hdlynn @legally-a-bastard @opheliaelysia @heather-lynn @sabinemorans @crazinessgraveyardsandcartoons @pedrospunk @maybege @chews-erotically @katlikeme @lose-eels @youmeanmybrain @theindiealto @irishleesh93 @seawhisperer @hdlynn @demigod-dragonrider-schoolidol @theindiealto @grapemama @roxypeanut @kochamcie @kiwi-the-first @hellomothermoon @soft-fanfics @spacegayofficial @storiesofthefandomloversreblogs @kindablackenedsuperhero @goblinqueen95 @nominalnebula @wheresthewater​ @letmybabysleep @hayley-the-comet​ @corrupt-fvcker​ @i-ship-it-ironically​ Hopefully I got everyone! Please message me to be added, comments to be added get lost in my activity. 

Ezra idly slid his fingers in between yours, his chest a firm presence at your back as he molded his body around yours. He had barely left your side since you came back from your brush with the guardians. 

“What was it like?”

“Hmm?” You questioned, tilting your head to look back at him. 

“Death.”

“Oh.” You frowned as you considered his question, watching your fingers as he played with them. “Cold and then warm.”

“Warm?” Ezra pressed his lips to the back of your shoulder. 

You exhaled slowly, searching for the right words to explain all of it to him. “It was cold and dark and then there were… stars. Falling all around me.”

He hummed softly against your shoulder, “That’s unexpected.”

“And I don’t know if that was even what death was. I can’t remember which came first. If the nothingness was before I woke up… or after.” You stretched your legs out before rolling over to face him. “Do you believe me?”

Ezra’s dark eyes searched yours for a moment before answering, “I believe that it is possible that you died and were revived. I can’t deny the potential, given my own curse.”

You reached out to trace your thumb over the curved scar on his cheek. “I should go back to the Block for the next full moon. I know I’m safe with you, but I also know that Shiva is likely losing their mind with my absence.”

He chuckled, “Do you think Shiva will believe you?”

“Your guess is as good as mine.” You shrugged, “They’ll probably force me to see a medic. Check me for concussions.” You turned your palm over to look at the healing cut. “I’ve just got a self-inflicted stab wound and a handful of someone’s fingerprints.”

Ezra scratched at the back of his ear, “I have recently found that it is impossible to be overzealous when it comes to you-almost-died sex.” 

“I think it’s more oh-shit-you-died sex.” You corrected, tapping your finger against his nose.

He caught your hand and rubbed his thumb gently over the spot just above your healing palm. “Touché.” 

“Why do you do that?”

“Hmm?” Ezra’s brows knit together.

“I just remembered that when I was lost in the darkness, I recalled the way you rubbed my palm.” 

“Ah.” He smiled fondly at you, “When I was wee lad, I used to be frightfully afraid when we’d leave orbit.” Ezra explained. “My mother used to take my hand like so,” He took hold of your hand. “And rub her thumb over the center of my palm to remind me that she wasn’t going anywhere.”

You smiled at him, “I like that.” 

He cocked his head to the side, “I like you.” 

“Read to me.” You murmured as you leaned in to kiss him. 

“And force me from my comfortable position?” Ezra huffed dramatically, even as he drew back the covers and moved to get out of the bed. 

You tucked your arm beneath your head and watched the muscles in his back move with him, as he went to look over your stack of books. 

“I’ll bring back more honeysticks.” You told him, “And perhaps track down the nonpareils you mentioned.”

“You feed into my sweet tooth,” He taunted, looking back at you. “When the sweetest thing of all is laying tangled up in our sheets.” 

“Our sheets?” You gave him a look. “I do believe I bargained these sheets out of a vendor on Phthalcol.” 

Ezra smirked, looking back at the books once more. He snatched one up and flipped through the pages. “Is that so?” 

“So smug.” You rolled your eyes. “I let you sleep in my bed for a handful of nights and now it’s our bed?”

“Aren’t our ships connected now?” He questioned, not looking back at you yet. 

“In theory.”

“Ah-ha!” Ezra licked his thumb before turning the page, reading it as he turned back towards you. “I knew I recalled seeing Herrick in this collection. An often forgotten fellow, you know.”

“I don’t know if I’m well versed in him.” 

“He was rather fond of the Greek poet Anacreon.” Ezra informed you, giving you an expectant look. 

“Wine, women, and…” You racked your brain for the third attribute. 

“Song.” 

“Are you going to sing now?”

Ezra rolled his eyes, “Though poetry could be song, in theory.” He shrugged his shoulders, “He was a hit of a religious poet too, back when society was limited in their dieistic notions.” 

“What have you picked to read?”

He stared at you for a long moment before clearing his throat and focusing on the page. “How love came in, I do not know, whether by th’ eye, or eare, or no. Or whether with the soule it came, at first, infused with the same. Whether in part ‘tis here or there, or, like the soule, whole everywhere. This troubles me, but as I well as any other, this can tell. That when from hence she does depart, the outlet then is from the heart.” 

“Herrick certainly knew what he was talking about,” You said gently as you smiled back at Ezra. “I’m glad we said it, more or less, before everything happened.” You told him as you sat up, picking at the edge of your blanket. “It wasn’t said because something happened.” 

Ezra nodded slowly, shutting the book closed as he moved to sit on the edge of the bed beside you. “Have you ever been in love before?”

“If you ask Shiva, I’m always falling in love.” You told him, lifting your gaze a little. “But twice. I think. It wasn’t like this.” You gestured between the two of you. 

“I always avoided it,” Ezra admitted quietly, reaching out to brush his fingers down your bare arm. “Skirted close, but never too close. These past five years made me realize how much I missed out on — thinking only of myself.” 

“Being open isn’t worth it,” You told him, shaking your head. “You usually get burnt. Bad.” 

“I’m assuming you’re referring to Mars and Alia?” 

“I don’t even want to get into Alia, but…” You pursed yourself lips. “Mars was very charming. Very charming.” You kept your eyes on the blanket beneath your fingers. “I fell headfirst into that dreamboat.” You snorted. “Lots of pretty words that amounted to — ‘you have a sweet connection with the head of Fiorta Corp. and that’s all this was about.’ Asshole.” 

“I’m sorry.” Ezra kept skimming his fingers over your arm. 

“Fortunately, I found out before I could’ve been foolish enough to get myself trapped into becoming his third wife. One and two actually warned me about his plans.” 

He hummed curiously, “It sounds like you were leading quite the adventurous life.” He leaned in and pressed a kiss to your cheek. “Are you sure you want to tie yourself to me?”

“Too late.” You reached out and tousled your fingers through his hair. “I much prefer this arrangement. For so many reasons.”

“Inquiring minds would like to know.” Ezra drawled out lazily as he reclined back on the bed. 

“Fishing for compliments?” You grinned as you settled back against him. 

He rested his chin in your shoulder, winding his arms around your middle. “Always.” 

You traced your fingertips over the back of his hand, sliding your fingers in between his. “I feel like it has to mean something that it didn’t work. They were able to wipe Sybil and Cora from Proctor’s mind, but.. they couldn’t pull you out of me.” 

Ezra fanned his fingers out on your stomach, before skimming upwards to rest at the curve of your ribs. “It certainly begs the question of why.” He nuzzled at the crook of your neck. “Is that the only reason?”

You snorted, reaching back to tug at his hair. “There’s also the fact that you’re handsome, smart, and humorous. But if we’re being honest, it was the books.” 

“I figured.” He chuckled, his breath warm against your shoulder. “I meant what I said, moonbeam. I’m not letting you go.” 

“I would be disappointed if you did.”

Ezra pressed another kiss to your skin. “I know at first I tried to convince you to leave, but I’m glad you chose to ignore me.”

“I’m stubborn by default.” You tilted your face towards him with a cheeky grin. 

His lips parted to say something, but a sudden bang at your transport door made you jump. 

“What the fuck?” You questioned, climbing out of his lap to find your clothes. 

“Stay here.” Ezra growled, his entire body going rigid as he snatched up his shirt and pulled it on over his head. 

Someone knocked — again. 

“Lock the door. Don’t open it.” He told you, turning to face you as you followed him towards the threshold. 

You reached out and grabbed his hand, rubbing your thumb over the center of his palm as you held his gaze. “Please be safe.”

They knocked again. 

Ezra leaned in and kissed you, “I love you.”

“I love you too.” You whispered, swallowing thickly as he pulled away from you. You watched him as he walked backwards towards the knocking. 

You hit the button on the wall, the door sliding closed and locking shut. Your heart was hammering in your chest as you pressed yourself against the cool durasteel and tried to listen through it. It was muffled and almost impossible to hear — but the knocking stopped. 

And everything fell silent.

The hairs on the back of your neck stood on end. The faded memory of the guardians still loomed over your thoughts. The man had reminded you of a statue — chiseled features and sharp eyes. Towering over you like a deadly beast in a man’s form. 

If they were the first creatures on Lykaios, there was no knowing what skill they had beyond Ezra’s abilities. 

You could barely hear the muffled sound of Ezra’s voice on the other side of the door, alongside a pair of voices that didn’t bode well for either of you. 

There was a shuffle of feet against durasteel, the whirr of the exterior shutting close, a slightly raised voice, and movement drawing closer to you. 

You had nowhere to go. 

“Moonbeam,” Ezra called out through the door. “It’s safe. Open the door. Your friends have made an appearance.” 

You pressed the release button on the wall, watching as the door unlocked and slid into the threshold. On the other side stood Ezra, flanked by Shiva and Quinn. 

“What are you doing here?”

“What am I doing here? What are you doing here?” Shiva shot back as they stepped forward to grab you. “I thought you were dead.” 

You wrapped your arms around them, looking over their shoulder at Ezra who was sizing himself up against Quinn. Quinn had a few inches on him and it was entertaining to see him try to make himself seem more imposing. 

“A lot has happened,” You told Shiva as you pulled back. “I didn’t make it back this time. Sorry for worrying you.”

“You even got me nervous,” Quinn remarked, looking between you and Ezra. “Is he always so bristly?” 

Your eyes flickered towards Ezra, when you heard him growl. “Hey. No.” You glared at Quinn. “Knock it off.” 

“Are you going to officially introduce us?” Shiva questioned as they took a step back, giving you a cheeky grin as they looked towards Ezra. “He just leered at us and told us we smelt like humans.” 

“Jury’s out on this one.” Ezra huffed, looking at Quinn briefly before stepping through the threshold and circling towards you. You didn’t need him to say he was uncomfortable — it was perfectly clear by the way his back was rigid and his jaw was set hard.

“Ezra, this is Shiva.” You said, trailing your fingers down the back of his arm gently as you gestured towards Shiva. “You’ve already heard all of my stories about my stalwart friend.” 

Shiva shook his hand with an arched brow, “I’ve heard plenty about you too.” They gave him a sweeping once over. “Trying to steal our girl.” 

You rolled your eyes, “And this is Quinn.”

Quinn offered his hand, but Ezra refused to shake it in return. “I don’t like this any more than you do.”

“I find that hard to believe,” Ezra huffed, reaching down to take your hand into his, interlacing his fingers with yours. 

“Why don’t we take this conversation out of our quarters.” You said, shooing them out of the room. 

“Our?” Shiva arched a brow at you, before starting ahead down the corridor with Quinn. 

Ezra tugged you to a stop, “Moonbeam.” 

You turned back towards him, “I know this is difficult for you.” You reached out and brushed your fingers over his cheek. 

He hung his head and gave a slight nod. “I’m afraid I don’t have it in me to be the most hospitable of guests. Particularly where he is involved.” Ezra sighed heavily, “Their arrival was unexpected, to say the least.”

You glanced down the corridor where you could hear the two of them laughing about something Shiva had said. “I didn’t even think that they would come here if I didn’t turn up.” You admitted, “I probably should’ve seen that coming, but it slipped my mind.”

Ezra touched your chin, brushing his thumb over your bottom lip. “I think that’s understandable. And they clearly care for you and your well-being.” He held your gaze. “I’m sorry.”

“What for?” Your brows furrowed as you searched his eyes. 

“My rabid jealousy.” Ezra’s eyes darted down the corridor. “I recognize it’s foolish.” 

You leaned in and kissed him, letting your lips linger there. “It’s okay, Ezra.” You brushed a lock of hair behind his ear. “Just don’t try to kill him.”

“Tempting.” 

“Are you two coming to join us?” Quinn called out. “Or was that a ploy to get a little alone time?”

“We’ll be right there.” You called back, smiling at Ezra. “You’re better at being sociable than you think. You were a perfect gentleman with Sybil and Cora.”

“Entirely different scenario.” He pointed out. “Neither of them desired you.” 

You felt heat rise to your cheeks. “Point taken.” 

Ezra stole another kiss, before taking ahold of your hand and starting back down the corridor towards the living area. 

Quinn was sprawled out on the makeshift sofa, tossing a stress ball into the air above him. “Do you think he likes fetc— Hello.” He jerked upright into a seated position. 

Shiva stifled a laugh. “Good job, Quinn.” They looked back towards Ezra. “I’ve always thought he’d go down greasy. He’s not worth eating.” 

“I’ll keep that in mind.” Ezra smirked, before gesturing for Quinn to get off the sofa who was quick to follow suit. 

“I had every intention of coming back to the Block, but things got out of hand here.” You explained as you settled onto the sofa beside Ezra. “Really out of hand.”

“Well, now you’re going to have to tell us.” Shiva gave you an expectant look. “I won’t judge you if you got distracted.”

“I wish it were that simple.” You picked a bit of dirt out of your thumbnail as you kept your eyes lowered to your lap. “It’s actually rather convoluted.” 

Ezra ran his hand down the length of your spine reassuringly. 

You rubbed your lips together, chewing at the inside of your bottom lip as you looked up at Shiva. “You’re just going to have to trust me on this one,” You said, “Lykaios has more secrets than we were aware of. Before the full moon, I was taken by the… I guess we’ll call them the Guardians. They were the first here on Lykaios, allegedly.”

Quinn cleared his throat, “If I may interject.” 

Ezra worked his jaw slowly as he glared at Quinn. “Do you know something?”

He nodded, “Shiva and I continued to do research after you left. Everything’s in my shuttle and you’re both welcome to it.” He leaned back against the wall, holding his arms across his chest. “There were three, I believe. Callisto, Dia, and Psophis. Arcadia has rivers named for each of them.”

You cocked your head to the side, “I encountered Callisto and Dio.” 

“Hmm.” Quinn rubbed his chin thoughtfully. “The rivers were named for the children of an old god. Descendants of the nymphs of the sea, so they say.” 

“I see you’re clever,” Ezra remarked with an edge of annoyance. 

Quinn shrugged, “Yes, well… the common denominator between us happens to surround herself with clever friends.”

“I can’t deny that,” You leaned into Ezra’s side. “That’s more than we knew before, so thank you for that.” You offered Quinn a small smile. “They are apparently the originators of the curse and… they tried to get rid of me the same way they got rid of Proctor.”

“Which is?” Shiva questioned. 

“They killed me and attempted to wipe my memories of Ezra. They didn’t succeed, clearly.”

“Back up, they killed you?” They leaned forward. “You should see a medic. You can’t just stay here when you could have something seriously wrong with you.”

“I told you.” You glanced sideways at Ezra. “Look, Shiva… I’m okay. I’ll see the medic when I go back to the Block in a few days.” 

“How do you know you died?” Quinn asked skeptically. 

“I just know.” You said sharply. “I know how I felt and what I saw.”

“She smells different, too.” Ezra offered, shifting beside you. “I can’t put my finger on what’s changed, but she smells like more.”

“You weren’t kidding about the smelling thing, were you?” Shiva laughed, shaking their head. “I definitely wasn’t expecting to find out that you died while you were away.”

Quinn snorted, “You were convinced she was dead.” 

“Only because she didn’t show up.”

“It’s been a blur,” You admitted. “We only had a few days between my kidnapping and the full moon and with how my mind was at the time…”

Ezra cut in, “We thought it was best that she stay here. Just in case whatever they did wasn’t fully out of her system.” 

Quinn frowned, “What do you mean how your mind was?”

“Is, really. Things are still spotty.” You gave an awkward laugh at that. “I would forget things. I’m still not entirely certain of things that happened that first month here.” 

“You remember Ay-7?”

“Quinn.” Shiva snapped and Ezra’s hand tightened at your waist instinctively. 

“Really?”

Quinn held up his hands in mock defense. “Just checking on where we stand.” 

You glared at him. “Not good.”

He snapped his fingers and nodded, “I figured.” 

Shiva rose from their seat, moving to sit on the cargo crate in front of the sofa, “I came with Quinn, so if you want a co-pilot back to the Block you’ve got me.”

“I might actually take you up on that.” You smiled, reaching out to give their shoulder a squeeze. “With everything you told me about people losing their minds when they leave Lykaois I’ve been nervous about leaving.” 

“Just,” Ezra started, his voice wavering a little. “Send her back to me.” 

Shiva tilted their head to the side as they looked at him then, “As long as you agree to send her back to me from time-to-time.” 

“There’s enough of me to go around,” You assured both of them, before holding up a hand to keep Quinn from commenting. “Not enough for you though.”

“You wound me.” Quinn shot back with a wicked smirk. “There used to be more than enough for me.”

Ezra leaned forward on the sofa and Quinn shuffled an inch further away from the three of you. “That’s what I thought.” 

“There’s too much testosterone in here.” You muttered and Shiva started laughing. 

“I think there’s too much Quinn here.” 

He scoffed, “You’re the one who dragged me along for the ride.”

“Because your shuttle’s fast.” Shiva rolled their eyes. “Don’t act like you weren’t worried for her.” 

“I’ll own up to that.” Quinn shrugged. 

“So, what other information did you find out about the moon?” 

He clicked his tongue against his teeth, “I put a few feelers out. Expressed some interest in launching my own mining team into Lykaois. Got a few bites, but they didn’t fully materialize before we disembarked.” 

“What exactly do you deal in?” Ezra questioned with a slight edge to his tone.

“What do you need me to deal in?” Quinn retorted. “I’m a man of many skills. Our dear friend is aware of that.” 

Ezra exhaled slowly through his nose, “I’m assuming if you call Ay-7 home, you’re not dealing in legal ventures?”

Quinn gave a short laugh, “You’re forgetting that I’ve seen your files. Quite the body count.” 

“Was I casting aspersions?” He countered, keeping his eyes fixed on Quinn. “Was I?” He looked towards you then. 

“It was definitely implied.” You smiled a little, nudging him in the ribs. “Quinn’s a bit of a jack-of-all-trades. His latest venture was a dust enterprise he ran into the ground. Before that he used to run fake licenses business for those that washed out of the program.”

“Some company you keep.” Ezra smirked, with a teasing tone. “Useful though.”

Quint puffed himself up, “I can be very useful.” 

“Quit peacocking.” Shiva warned him, before grabbing their satchel up off the floor. “I forgot to mention I brought goodies. I figured if you’d missed coming back to the Block, you’d need supplies.” 

You scooted forward to the edge of the sofa to peer into their bag, “Are those honeysticks?”

Shiva grinned, “I figured you’d need your magic beast taming treats.” 

“Hilarious,” Ezra remarked wryly, holding his hand out for one. 

Shiva popped the box open and passed him one of the sticks. ��I don’t get the appeal, but I respect it.” 

He tore off the end of the stick and sucked at it as he sank back against the sofa. “I believe they call it creature comforts.” Ezra stated.

“What else did you bring?” You questioned, grabbing the satchel away from them. “You were so worried about my well-being that you stopped by the bakery for fruli pies?” 

“I can be magnanimous when I feel like it.” Shiva retorted, watching as you turned towards Ezra to show him the mini pies you loved. “I figured I should satisfy both of your sweet tooth needs.” 

“What are they?” Ezra questioned, examining them curiously. “Are those berries?”

You nodded, “A sweet flaky pastry with a berry concoction in the middle. They keep for weeks.” 

“She’s always been fond of stocking up and hiding them around the transport before long missions.” Shiva pointed out. 

“Only because I’ll eat them all day one if I don’t.” You laughed, popping the package open to grab one. You took a bite with a satisfied moan, before passing it to Ezra. “Here.”

He took the bite from your fingers, chewing it thoughtfully before smirking, “I see why they need to be hidden around the ship.”

“Right?” You grinned. “We eat a lot of berries that grow here. There’s even some decent ones that are winter berries.”

“I haven’t been venturing out,” Ezra admitted. “So we’ve leaned on her ready-to-eat meals.”

“Cardboard and iron.” You scrunched up your nose. “I was going to bring more when I come back after the next full moon.”

“Are you not leaving the ship?” Quinn questioned.

“I don’t want to risk her being found again.” Ezra stated. “We were careful about coming back from my transport. There’s a chance the guardians will try to hurt her again.”

You snapped your fingers and shot finger guns at Ezra, “Not looking to die again this soon.”

Quinn frowned, “So you really died?” 

“It was a whole ordeal.” You licked some of the berry juice off your thumb. “But I’m okay now. I think.”

“Please let the medic check you over.” He said gently. “That can’t be good for you. I am worried about you… as a friend.”

You rolled your eyes, “As long as we’re clear on that.” You looked back to Shiva then. “What else did you bring?”

“Well, I was picturing you chewed up and spit out by a beast, so I brought you new clothes.”

“I’ll take those anyways.” You took the clothes from them. “I appreciate how committed you were to rescuing me.” 

They shrugged, “At rare times I’ve found I can be a good friend. Just consider all of this added on to what you owe me for cheating me out of this haul.” 

“Figures.” You snorted.

“Not to run you off so soon,” Ezra started with a polite tone. “But depending on where your transport is parked, you should start back before nightfall.” 

You nodded, “It’s not safe to be out there right now. We still don’t know what the guardians—“

Shiva laughed, “You just want to get back to whatever we interrupted. I saw what a mess your bed was.”

“This is so much worse than I imagined.” You grumbled, covering your face. “In all sincerity, this is out of concern. After what they did to me, I don’t want either of you dealing with it.” 

Quinn pushed off the wall, “I don’t want anyone rearranging my head.” He clapped his hands together, “Come on Shiva, let’s get out of the lover bird’s hair. I’m sure you’ll get all the gossip when you head back to the Block.” 

“Come by in the morning.” You smiled at them. 

“Not too early.” Ezra tacked on. “I like my sleep.” 

Shiva winked at him, before turning towards Quinn. “Let’s get out of here.” 

You lingered in the living area as Ezra saw them out of the transport. Shiva had left their bag behind, filled with a handful of other goodies they had brought for you. Everything you would’ve needed if something had gone wrong. 

Despite how often the two of you were at each other’s necks, at least they were your one true friend. Through thick and thin… and falling in love with a werewolf. They stood by you. 

[life-rewritten]

GIANTS OF BL 2021 AKA SHOWS LINED UP FOR GMMTV THAT WE WON’T STOP SCREAMING ABOUT!

Is there a way I can get over the addiction of BLS? Apparently not because GMMTV came and slapped me across the face for ever thinking I could. Like what even was that conference? I came in like yeah I've heard the rumours. 6 BLs! LOL, you're kidding, like nothing I'd want would even happen. But I still made a list of everything I wanted from them and held that checklist in my mind and boy was I shocked! I ended up just on the floor, brain exploded, mind shut down and can you believe I was crying? Like why on earth was I crying for GMMTV BLs? Crazy right? I am absolutely left floored, I'm going to be crying as I write this by the way just so you know, I've got my heart full ready to burst, talking about the change we've seen in BLs this year, the journey, the growth; there's still some work to do, but GMMTV said they were also part of that, they were going to change and make us stay, wanting more. They did that in a 3-hour conference. My brain is ready, my mind is prepared, my heart is available for all these shows, and I can't wait to see what 2021 unfolds. Let's begin screaming:

Ratings: From 1 to 5 (1 being least excited to watch, 5 being most,) how excited am I to delve into these shows?

THE NICE SURPRISES

BAKERY BOYS

Genre/Themes: Thriller, Bromance, Mystery, Psychological, Drama, Friendship, BL? (The manga is), Baking

Verdict: You know I love Antique when immediately I see that Foie's hands shaking as he has to be one of the waiters in the cafe, reminds me back to another favourite bodyguard of mine doing so. I was in shock; One because Antique was one of my first Korean 'BL' movies I saw, with all my favourite actors, an unusual and intriguing plotline and I ate it up; all of it. I didn't like how censored it was and the weird open ending for the relationship in the show. But I couldn't care less, something about it made me happy. I just loved the characters I think, and I enjoyed seeing our 4 bakers become friends and find a weird found family with each other. Add in a mystery to why Joon’s character wanted to kill himself and hated cakes? And I was sold. Now GMMTV is making a remake for it, and SINGTO is playing my favourite gay baker. Like I am so happy with this. Do I expect this to blow my mind? No. Do I expect more BL? A little? I'm not sure like GMMTV could make Antique a BL if they want to, Korea hinted to it, Japan ignored it in anime and others, but Thailand could change that. I'm not holding hopes for it, but I love this cast just as much as I love the Korean Cast like Lee Thanawat is perfect for this role, Singto is greater (I just love him so much) and we even have Pleum and Foei?? Are you kidding me? Greatness. It's going to be fun to see what they do with the mystery—something I greatly liked in the movie. Let's hope it's more fleshed out in the tv show. So excited!

Ratings: 3.5/5 I mean it's not really a BL so it'll feel queer baity for me and I may end up being annoyed it, but I really do have fond memories of the Korean movie, so I want to be excited, and the cast is everything so we'll see.

FISH UPON THE SKY

Genre: Unrequited Love, Comedy, Romance, Rivalry, Haters to Lovers, 

Verdict: 

DID SOMEONE SAY JITTIRAIN: THEORY OF LOVE? 2GETHER??? Sorry for screaming but like what else am I meant to do. Theory of love is my ultimate BL show, one of it anyway, one of the reasons will be discussed even more later with another show, but this is not about them. Also, 2gether is like one of the biggest BLs ever right now. Jittirain is genius, she has this ability to make you feel for her characters, root for their love stories whilst throwing plot twists everywhere. I also like that she always has a focus; theory of love, we had film theory, 2gether we had music, and now we have Fish Upon the Sky, and we have?

 Medicine? Love rivalry? Honestly, I don't know, the title even makes me feel even weird; what the hell does Fish upon a sky mean? But who cares it's a Jittirain classic, comedy, pain, longiiiing, and unrequited love, and scheming to get unrequited loves requited, more side couples and secretive characters. This time we have PHUWIN (had to emphasise that because he's impressive people stop sleeping on him!), one of my favourite youngins, showing up and becoming our main Pi and we have Pond a newbie, who has charisma for days, and he plays Mork, and they are love rivals. Wait what? A love story between two people who fall for each other after chasing after one guy? I'm ready for this, the haters to lovers, the pain of unrequited longing, but hold on it seems like a plot twist! Seems like we have another oblivious protagonist on our hand aside from Tine in 2gether, Pi can't even see that Mork isn't chasing after the same person as him, but for he's chasing after him! Sarawat scheming activated! I'm expecting giggles, chemistry and a great story. And it's going to be great because it's Jittirain. 

Ratings: 4.5/5 It's not anything new but do I need to repeat my self? Theory of love pining and longing and emotions mixed with 2gether's secrecy, scheming and obliviousness? It's going to be great. The cast is also excellent, I have total faith in this show, better be a good director though (oh no nightmares from the last half of 2gether has returned). 

FINDING ENCHANTE

Genre: Romance, Comedy, Angst, Drama, Friends to Lovers, Haters to Lovers, Harem, Mystery, 

Verdicts: 

Enchante that means nice to meet you aww. Wow, now I know French. Yay now where do I sign up to be like Theo and have 5 men chasing after me? Actually, that sounds like a nightmare, and I don't have time for that. He does apparently. Guess what guys! I knew I had a feeling in my gut when I watched this drama, I felt the memories, the intuition, the clues, hitting my brain, and I realised why. This show is also written by My gear and your gown's writer. YES! You mean more mystery and subtext filled storytelling, a show where I can analyse the character dynamics, and find clues to piecing the story together??? Perfection. As much as My gear and your gown wasn't everything to me, it was everything to me when I analysed it, I have fun with this writer's works when directed properly her works have great potential to be one of the best. I love GMMTV giving new actors the time to shine, and choosing stories that make my mind start working again. Thank you. 

With this show we're having a love Simon flashbacks with our Simon being sent secret messages through a book by Enchante, he's sweet, caring and totally all about making our lead comfortable. Who could he be?

 The best friend who's totally pining from afar and playing off his feelings like its nothing?  My gut is already saying that Tine definitely wants it to be him (so again requited but they don't know trope? you've got me!)

Is it the playboy guitar extraordinaire played by GAWIN you heard me right GAWIN my Mork in Dark Blue Kiss!! Like what? Where've you been boy? He looks so great in this, by the way, he's a tease, likes to play our lead's feelings, and has chemistry because they're haters to lovers.  

Or is it FLUKE PUSIT?? What even is this cast how is it both my favourite actors are here? Anyways Fluke is an artist, he wants our lead to let him in so he can draw him, our lead is his muse apparently, and again chemistry that makes your head hurt because like who is this damn Enchante?? Who will Theo choose? 

Anyways we then have two people who I don't know that well sorry, Boom is the football captain that likes our lead and is always protecting him, and the other is a genius/nerd? Who helps Theo with his studies? Like wow, it must be great to be Theo, guys from different lifestyles and aesthetics have found him, they want him, they need him and one of them he wants and needs. I wonder who it is. 

Ps people already thinking it's the best friend, not me, I think bestie is obviously endgame Tine is definitely also secretly wanting him to be with that pining and longing (I'm sure it's why he wants to find enchante desperately). I can't wait to see why these two refuse to let each other know how it feels. All I beg for is, please don't let New direct this. Guess what it's produced by X (Theory of Love! Hold on while I cry again) and Film! (Also theory of love!) Oh, this is going to be brilliant!

Ratings: 4.5/5 This drama is probably going to be the most underrated because people have other things to care about I don't blame you, but I think for me, this would be a same favourite way I loved MGYG and I'm ready for new faces, Gawin and Fluke and a requited but they don't know it angsty love story plus I know the directing is going to be amazing!. Ps, I actually hate harems, but the excitement is in figuring out who on earth is Enchante and why this is happening! 

THE BIG BOYS

GMMTV decided to not let me rest next year. How is it that I already felt happy by seeing Phuwin, Gawin, Fluke etc... I was content you know, I was like great we have a great line up I'm excited now I don't think there's anything else I secretly want that will happen. I'm being a clown, BUT NO. EVERYTHING I ASKED FOR: EVERYONE I WANTED TO SEE, EVERY TROPE I WANTED, THE DIRECTOR, THE PLOTS, EVERYTHING WAS MANIFESTED BY THESE THREE TRAILERS. That's why I ended up crying.  Because even till this day I can't believe this is real. I don't know when I'll finally think they will be real in 2021. Crying again!

NOT ME 

Genre: Gang, Mafia, Crime, Romance, Drama, Stolen Identity, Twins, Angst

Not me? Not you? Not us? See how my mind scrambles when it comes to this show. Because I was determined to not be a clown and believe in this even when I saw OFF GUN hold onto each other on the motorbike I was like HA, nope they're just guest stars, when I saw them as gang members I was like HA; interesting probably not BL. When I saw two Guns, I was like HA, nice Gifted character flashback but still not BL. I won't fall for it,  this is a BAIT! You get me? BAIT!! Don't fall for it and then GMMTV was like shut up here's a kiss. And then I broke down and cried. Because it was a journey. 

Remember when I said Theory of Love was my favourite? It's because of these two; OffGun is everything, my favourite BL couple on screen, my favourite fanservice couple, everything. I thought that the end of theory of love meant I won't be seeing them for a while, they'd be in other series separate, they'd not want to be typecasted. Gun would go for serious roles, Off will choose more het romantic comedies, don't blame them. Still, I didn't think I'd see them again, and I wasn't sure I wanted to see them in another university setting. I set my mind on only seeing them in fan meetings and side projects, I'd made up my mind to miss them. And then NOT ME happened, and now I'm crying just at the thought;

This isn't a cringy, comedic, cheesy BL. 

This isn't set in University.

This isn't'  unrequited pining from Gun to Off.

Gun is Dark! I repeat Gun went Dark he became a gang leader determined to break the law, called Black and Off; OFF went serious and he's Gun's right-hand man called Sean, and I'm just like wait is this real?? We're getting dark, gritty OFF GUN??? Are you serious?? See?? still can't believe it, and it's BL??? What is this? Christmas?? Like how did we get this, who came up with this idea THANK YOU SO MUCH. 

I thought nothing could beat theory of love for me and now OffGun came back and said HA you thought. I have a lot of feels about this, I will never stop screaming, I've rewatched that youtube trailer now for about more than 20 times, I'm not even kidding you, every day it's on repeat, I'm just ready, ready to write, to scream, to talk about this in so much detail. Let's get a plot that's deep, thrilling and mysterious, let's get a romance that is interesting, angsty but also sweet, let's get acting that is full of range, that will break my heart but fix it together again, let's get chemistry that would make me forget everything else. I'm ready for this. I've never been more ready!

Ratings: 5/5 What were you expecting? I can't even rate this anything else, nothing about this is worrying; even the director I trust she's also worked with Gun before in another movie of his, she respects LGBTQ, and she wants to make a great BL. I just can't believe this is real. 2021 come faster, I beg you. 

BAD BUDDY 

Genre: Forbidden romance, Haters to Lovers, Romance, Comedy, Opposites attract, Angst, Friends to Lovers, 

Verdict: 

You thought my screaming would be over. But no. GMMTV wasn't done with me yet. It's like it knew I was mourning from my lack of Ohm Pawat after rewatching He's coming to me (review here) and it knew I had just finished watching Gifted Graduation and felt slighted to see my opportunity at seeing Nanon as a BL character being taken from me with that finale. GMMTV knew I was empty without them and decided to mock me, and put me back together by making OHM NANON in a series together,. 

Again the same process as Not me; I started laughing when I saw the trailer like a mad person. I was like this is clearly a queer bait bromance, HA, not falling for it GMMTV almost got me this time, but then there were the stares, the Romeo and Juliet energy, the sneaking into each other's rooms, the becoming secret friends despite being haters to lovers, the skinship, the intimacy, and then the jealousy, the pining, the longing, the are we just friends scene??? WAIT, WHAT IS THIS?? Why is AOF directing this (same director of ALL my favourite BLS), what is this GMMTV? 

Nanon wouldn't be in a BL we know this, we've been clowns, but we accepted this with defeat, why is he now saying he's doing one because of the cast? THIS IS A BL? NOT BAIT? NOT A TRICK? BY AOF? WHATTTTTTT???? see my mind exploded. 

Since then it hasn't still comprehended this. This is insane, do you know how good, how genius, how amazing Nanon and Ohm Pawat is?? Do you see the power this holds? The fact it's directed by Aof who's like one of the best directors ever in GMMTV??? Do you even know what this means? For this GENRE??? Sorry, I have to scream. I still can't believe this! This is something someone would say, and we'd laugh it of as a joke like yeah right, in your dreams, but it's real, and it looks absolutely amazing, is it a university setting YES, so what? This is everything, with haters to lovers but not really, to Romeo and Juliet pining and longing, to the chemistry that takes your breath away. To just Ohm and Nanon in a screen together being in love. Yep, you guessed it my mind is never goanna be whole again after this breakdown. Guess what I'm okay with it. 

Ratings: 5/5 OhmNanon, Aof that's it. That's the post.

A TALE OF A THOUSAND STARS

 Genre/Themes: Military, Romance, Comedy, Drama, Heart Transplant, Unrequited Love, Fish out of water, 

Verdict:

 And we come to this big one here. You see it? It screams 2021 show of the year to me, it screams incredible plot and romance to me, it screams unique and exciting BL to me. Guess what? It's also by Aof. Ha. It took me a year to accept this is happening because when the trailer came out, I knew that with this cursed genre that this was too good that there'd probably be some kind of issue with it. But did it matter? No! Because this was real. Earth and Mix were in a BL together, and it looks so amazing, so great, and it's coming in less than 3 months. I'm going to cry. And it means everything; because there's a hint of character dynamics, angst and also haters to lovers. I see the chemistry, the production, the plot, the actors, and I just feel so ready for this show that I have no other words to say except I love it, I love it, I love it!. 

Ratings: 5/5 It's taken years, but I'm ready for this, I just want the trailer now, I want the show now, I want 2021 to start now. This is definitely a giant for sure, it's everything, and I can't wait for it. 

After screaming at everything; 2021 starting with ATOTS is already a sign, we're in for a great year with so many incredible changes in this genre. GMMTV isn't messing around, with subs in their event to show international fans are no longer forgotten and are heard and respected, with actors that have made their way into my heart and refuse to leave, and I'm just so happy. It may seem so extreme to be this excited for a BL series to be good, but I love this genre, I love seeing what it represents to so many people, I love the interesting storylines, the discussions you can have for days because of it, the tears, angst, and happiness you feel. But most of all I love how BL has brought out writing from me, I'm happy when I analyse this genre, I'm delighted discussing real-life links and conversations derived from it, I'm so glad learning and humbling my self and opening my mind to new things. BL has been a source of excitement, shock and happiness this year. I can't for next year to be even more splendid, and with this line-up, it's going to be even more than that. It's going to break the world. Can't wait. 

[dying-artist-yes]

A Temporary Parting

So my friends decided to do nice things for me and I have decided to do nice things back. I will be doing these for 6 characters and this is the first character; Remi. Let’s gooooo.

Mum, I’m sorry for how this starts off. I promise it gets fluffier later okay? @alyssoujo​

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- How long had it been since she’d left him? Since God had so cruelly torn his beloved away from him? Lucifer still remembered it clearly as if it had happened yesterday. He remembered it often. He would replay it over and over until she returned. He had been in his office, working away at the latest stack of paperwork dropped onto him. With Barbatos gone, he and Diavolo were having to cover for him as well and so, their normal paperwork was doubled. He had been frustrated and irritated for at least 3 days now. Not primarily because of work but because he had an argument with Remi. Yes, they’ve bickered before but it was just that; bickering. Never had she raised her voice with him like that. Through their pact, he knew she had regretted it almost immediately but not once did she call in the 3 days that had followed. He hadn’t reached out to her for the first few hours, thinking they both needed time to cool off so they could talk about what had just happened and reconcile but a message never came from her. He sent her so very many but she didn’t even see them. He grew frustrated, thinking she was ignoring him still due to their argument and stopped texting and attempting to call her after a while of being ignored. He just concluded that when she’d had enough of ignoring him, she’d call him. Yet that never came. It had been 3 days and not so much as a peep from her. She hadn’t even been online in the past 3 days. This made Lucifer worried but, of course, he was basically bound to his desk until he finished working. That’s part of what had been frustrating him; his inability to check up on his wife and see if she was alright. To be able to see for himself that she was just ignoring him longer than usual because he had been insensitive towards her two male friends.  Seems he need not wait any longer. He could feel a tug, a very strong one, pulling on the back of his right hand, where his pact mark with Remi rested. ‘Finally...’ He thought to himself with a soft sigh before responding to the summon, expecting to be hugged by his wife or something of the sort but what greeted him made his entire world come crashing down. He was in a dark room he didn’t recognize, far from Paris as far as he could tell. When he first appeared, Lucifer’s thoughts were ‘Why would she come to a place like this?’ His question was answered all too soon as the moment he looked in front of him, he was greeted by the dying form of his wife.  “REMI!”  Panicked took ahold of him as he picked up her bloodied form, cradling her in his arms. He muttered every healing spell he knew, anything that could keep his wife from leaving him. She was sickly pale, a hole in the middle of her chest as though someone had ripped something out, and had been soaking in a pool of her own blood. “H-Hang on...! You will be fine...!” His voice broke as he said this but he didn’t care. All he cared about was making sure she would see the light of day. That his light wouldn’t leave his side. Why was she here? Who did this? All these questions ran through his head but were brought to a halt when he felt his wife’s cold hand on his cheek.  “Luci...fer... It’s... too late...” Came her weak voice and his eyes widened as he heard her words. Why didn’t he check sooner? Why didn’t he keep trying to reach out to her? He could’ve gone to Paris to visit her. He should’ve gone to talk to her. “I... am sor...ry... I...” She was struggling just to speak and Lucifer shook his head, letting the tears fall as he gently brought her head up to press his forehead against hers. “Shhh... I should be the one who’s sorry... I should have come to check on you... I should have come to you...” He mumbled as the tears kept falling. Remi weakly tried to wipe them away as she shook her head to the best of her abilities. “I... should ha...ve... summon...ed... y-you... sooner...” She got out weakly and with every breath she took, Lucifer could feel more life leave her. She was dying in his arms and he was helpless just as he had been the past 3 times. She was slipping out of his grasp and he couldn’t do anything. He was too late to save the woman he loved above all else. The woman who became his world. “Remi please... D-Don’t leave me too... Please...” He was begging. He wouldn’t do this but if it meant she lived, he would beg anyone, even his Father he despised above all else. He couldn’t lose her too. He couldn’t lose her like he had lost Lilith.  “I-I’m... sorry... about... our argu...ment... I-I was... too harsh... I-I had... so much... to tell... you...” She too was crying now as her death approached her. “P-Please... G-Grant this one wish... of mine...” She said weakly as Lucifer looked at her desperately. The tears wouldn’t stop it no matter how much he wanted them to and once again he found himself cursing his pride. Had he just reached out to her when he felt her regret and sorrow, perhaps this could have been avoided. “What... What is it dearest wife...?” He got out weakly. “P-Please... F-Find me again... I-I know... i-it is sel...fish... b-but... p-please... wait for... me... a-and f-find me... l-like you promised...” She said, whimpering quietly as more tears flowed down her cheeks. “Of course... You forget who you have for a husband... You are mine for all eternity, just as I am yours... So no matter how long it takes, I will find you once again... I will find you as many times as needed... We shall be together in every life given to you...” He said softly, placing her hand against his cheek.  She gave him a weak yet fond smile as she weakly caressed his cheek. He leaned into her cold touch. “Thank.. you... I love you...” She said, barely above a whisper before she fell limp. It took him a moment to register that she had truly left him. However... “This is just a temporary parting... I will ensure it...” He said softly as he held her lifeless body in his arms. He had remained like this for a while until Diavolo had appeared behind him. Upon seeing his friend grieving like this, the prince’s heart broke. “Lucifer...” “I am fine Diavolo.” He said as he stood up with Remi in his arms. Even in death, she looked serene and beautiful to him. Even if she had been torn away from him in this life, he’d ensure no one could do so in the next. 

He sighed, opening his eyes. He remembered the concerned looks his brothers had given him. He remembered throwing himself into work. Even if he knew she would return somehow, it still hurt. There was still a hole in his heart. He still felt incomplete. He would read her letters. He would look at the small figurine she had gotten him. Listen to the song she’d made for him. Everything she’d given him, he would look over because they were little parts of her he still had with himself.  Of course, he hadn’t forgotten the promise he’d made with her. He’d spent the last 600 years searching for her but to no avail. What was Father doing with her soul for the past 600 years? Keeping it hostage? He let out a frustrated sigh and hid his face in his hands. He needed tea. He needed to calm down so he could focus on work again. However, before he could even get up to brew the tea, the doors to his office burst open to reveal everyone’s favorite neighborhood angel; Simeon. 

Lucifer pulled his face out of his hands and normally would have glared at him for barging in like this but he noticed the urgent look on his face. He raised a brow in a questioning manner and the angel just took a moment to catch his breath. “I... I have something. For you.” Simeon got out in between his many pants. Lucifer didn’t quite understand what could warrant this reaction out of the normally calm and collected Simeon but he nodded and gestured for Simeon to bring whatever it was he had found. Simeon gestured for a Little D to come in and Lucifer’s eyes widened. “Is that...” “A bouquet of blue roses? Yes. Someone left it at the Angel’s Halo along with a letter addressed to you.” Simeon said as he searched through his pockets before pulling out a baby blue envelope from his pocket.

Lucifer swiftly took the letter but was very careful in opening it. The first thing he saw had almost made him feel as though his breath had been caught in his throat. It was a picture. A picture of a young woman smiling with a bouquet of blue and red roses. Straight black hair, unlike her previously half and half black on the left and white on the right hair, and straight bangs. It was still waist length, just less wavy. Her skin tone was more towards porcelain now than pale ivory but the one thing that hadn’t been altered about her, left untouched completely, were her eyes. Her striking blue eyes he remembered peering into only to see love and adoration for himself. The eyes that would shine whenever they saw him. The eyes that belonged to his wife. 

There were various pictures like this. About 10. Whoever took the pictures seems close with her. He then pulled out the letter and opened it to read the contents of it. The letter read;

“Hello Lucifer,

It has been 600 years since you’ve seen the lovely young lady in the picture, yes? Well~ She was finally reborn~ She’s a lovely young demon born in Canada. I made sure her parents named her Remi so you don’t have to get used to another name. You would think that being reborn would mean she has no memories of her past life and yet your influence has not left her in the slightest.

Every birthday she has had the past... what? 121 years now? she has only asked for one thing; blue roses. The gift you got her on her birthday all those years ago. I am certain if you go check, those are blooming again. Each and every blue rose she has received, she cherishes with her life until it wilts. She is also very fond of the color red and the color blue. Hm... I wonder why? She’s also very fond of making spicy food and warm desserts despite not liking them. Once again, I wonder why? Oh! And also, she has turned down everyone that’s ever tried to hit on her. She threatens them with a description of a man that matches yours. When I asked her where she got it from, she said she dreamt of this person and even if she was not sure whether or not he was real, the love she saw in this person’s eyes made her feel whole and so if needed, she’d spend her entire life looking for him. She’ll only accept you.

Anyways. You are probably curious as to why you haven’t bee able to find her if she’s been alive for 121 years now. Well, that would be because of your Father. Well, more Michael really. He has made sure every time you’ve come across her, she didn’t see you and you didn’t see her. I really don’t understand why but it is what it is.

I, however, do no take orders from Michael so while he is kept busy, I am ensuring you find Remi. Her memories are not gone. God did not keep her soul for 479 years for no reason. She spent all that time bargaining to keep her memories. To be born anything but a human so she would not have to leave your side again. After much insistence, He allowed it on the condition that she would only remember once reunited with you. Apparently Michael had a problem with that. Since I’m the one doing it though, he can suck it because he can’t punish me. 

She is currently visiting England, London to be specific, the last picture I sent is proof of that. That’s why I sent the bouquet of blue roses to Simeon with this letter because I knew he’d get it to you. 

Come and get your wife before Michael sticks his nose in where it doesn’t belong again.”

He didn’t need to be told twice. “Simeon-” “I’m ready to accommodate you Lucifer. You helped me when I needed to find Celes, this is the least I can do to repay that debt.” He said with a soft smile before opening his arms up. “Hug?” “... Just this once.” Lucifer said with a soft sigh before getting up and hugging Simeon, who happily hugged back. He’d finally be reunited with her again. He’d make sure she stayed this time. “Let us get going... I’ve made her wait long enough.” He said, pulling away from the hug as Simeon grinned and nodded. The two of them made their way to the human world so the Avatar of Pride’s bride could return to him, so she could return home.

Despite his many protests, Simeon insisted Lucifer stay with him and Celestina. In a way, he was glad Simeon was so stubborn. It was nice to be surrounded by Simeon’s sunny family. Before, it hurt to be around anyone’s family because all he could see was Remi but now... with her about to return, rather than seeing their family as a fleeting dream, he saw it as something he would make a reality. He would not allow anything to get in-between them this time, especially not Michael. So looking at Simeon’s sunny family and playing with his kids... it reminded him of what he will soon have.

While Simeon oversaw his kids taking care of the Angel’s Halo, Lucifer would go to scour London in order to find Remi. She was close, he could feel it. As he made his way around, a garden caught his eye. It reminded him of the garden outside of the Mausoleum where he would lay down on her lap while she ran her fingers through his hair as Cerberus played with one of his many toys. The last memory he had of that was after she’d returned from her human world trip. She noticed he had been stressed so she took him to see Cerberus. Then, when they reached the park, she had him lay his head down on her lap while she ran her fingers through his hair and sang for him.

He inhaled as he closed his eyes, remembering that scene. ‘We can make many more this time.’ He thought to himself before opening his eyes again. He was just about to continue walking when he heard soft singing coming from the garden he had previously thought empty. 

“... A ring on my finger and a promise of eternity...~ The one promise I refuse to fail to keep...~”

‘That’s...’ He recognized those lyrics. He quickly rushed into the garden and frantically looked around for the source of the singing. That’s when he saw her by the fountain in the middle of the garden, looking down at her lap which had a sketchbook on it.

“Every moment I spend with you~ My heart hammers away~ Screaming at me “Never let him go!” Oh I know, I know~ The kind of happiness I have with him~ No other could compare~ I love you I love you I love you~” “I love you~ I love you~ I love you so~”

Remi looked up from her sketchbook and towards the person who completed the chorus to the song and blinked when she saw him. She stood up, sketchbook in hand, and started walking towards him. Lucifer, in return, started walking towards her and met her at about halfway. “You’re... real, right?” Were the first words from her. Even her voice was the same. “Yes, I am real.” He responded with a smirk. “Would you like to check should you not believe me?” He asked with a raised brow. Remi hesitantly placed a hand on his cheek and immediately winced, placing her hand on her temple as she wobbled a little. Lucifer immediately wrapped his arm around her waist to steady her. “Remi...! Are you alright...?” He asked, worry settling in. Maybe he shouldn’t have come in contact with her. What if he accidentally triggered something that would end her life? What if- 

“I-I’m fine... M-My dearest Avatar of Pride...” She said smiling up at him through the pain. Lucifer could feel relief wash over him and for the first time in 600 years, he felt happy. “Just... remembering things... I would hate to not have any memories of you...” She said, leaning into his arms and resting her head against his chest. “You’re home now...” He said softly as he rubbed soothing circles on her back. “Yes... I’m home again...

... You found me.”

[hiimsociallyawkward]

a servant of two masters

hi friends welcome back to me aimlessly ranting about merlin. up today we have 4.06 and this episode. wow. literally just the title gives me everything i need and i'm absolutley here for the chaos that will ensue. hi bestie @lady-ofmagic-andstars

i love them in their capes

i want a cloak

dude the 'oh it's not gonna happen' and then it happens trope is so dumb but i laugh every time

notice how the knights ripped off their capes

dude people are falling off of horses and out

MERLIN

ok ok but how is he injured. ik this is rated for kids but i really dk how badly merlin is injured. it looks like just his shoulder but he shouldn't be almost dying like his yk?

:,) arthru making jokes

ok but i love arthur taking care of merlin

alskdjflsadk them trying to make jokes to make each other feel better :,)

stop arthur. stop telling the truth merlin's not dying here 😭

bestie vibes only deadass

HAHA

a s s

side note, the site i get my screenshots from- this picture has 61 views while others average maybe like 10-15?? perverts HAHA just kidding

sok i'm actually really curious as to what merlin's injury is

alsdjf;lasdfjsaldfjsaldf merlin making the rocks fall

idk if it's jut the angling but i felt like the enemies were way too close for merlin to create an entire rock barrier. i don't have any screen shot evidence but so you're just going to have to take my word for it

ok but like who even are these men. they were working for morgana trying to capture arthur?

and what's morgana going to do once she has arthur? kill him and take his place on the throne? remember how well that turned out last time she tried that? no one wanted her. idk idk morgana is just confusing as to what she wants

pls die agravaine

haha strangely fond of the boy? there's nothing strange about it

ok i laughed but i also felt bad when morgana splashed merlin awake and flailed around like a fish

dude merlin is so snarky here and i'm HERE for it

ok i like the knights being competent. thank you thank you

and now they're riding back into camelot with their capes on? you're telling me they traced back their steps to find their capes, dusted them off to make sure that they weren't too dirty and didn't have any leaves or branches still sticking to it before riding back to camelot? iconic

poor gaius. ok he's the worst but he does think of merlin as his son and this makes me sad

ok i have a dumb question. do you think merlin understands whenever other magic users are casting spells? ok i feel like this is a dumb question now. but like, is magic a language? are all incantations in a different language, so when other person who knows magic is watching you- they know what you're trying to do and such? i feel like "of course they'd know" but i'm basing that assumption on hp where everyone knows that alohomora is alohomora and where everyone knows that lumos is lumos. but what about here? does merlin know what she's incanting? can he slightly understand it even if he's never seen/done it before? is magic a language like latin, and even if you aren't completely fluent, you and parse together things and make an assumptions?

arthur is just so sad here

i just, i have to have these here

yes bby figure out that we have a traitor

gaius is not slick in the slightest. yes. look at the traitor king

wow morgana being able to bond with the snake? i wonder how

ok question, does the fomorroh have some sort of loyalty to whoever calls them?

✨kill arthur pendragon✨

ok that snake going in his neck is actually scary

pretty castle counter: 5

btw this is actually my zoom background sometimes. it depends from call to call but it changes between this pretty castle and peeta mellark

G E O R G E

ok i've seen all the tumblr posts but it doesn't get less funny. the 'merlin's missing and we can't find him so we're going to replace him with another manservent dressed EXACTLY like merlin so arthur feels better' makes me chuckle every time

i would like to have that for breakfast

i like the loyalty arthur thank you. i love the loyalty pls. i love that they're friends. like, i love the romance but i love just people being friends too

ok this whole scene. arthur wanting to look for merlin because he has to at least try, gwen just wanting arthur to be careful and to come back to her, gwaine being buds. i love all the friendships in this and just yes thank you

ok ok ok ok ok ok ok ok i'm not at the hug scene yet but i know it's coming and i'm beyond excited

ok this sound track is so cute.

saldkfj;asldkfjasldkfsd

matching icons for you and your best friends

deadass if someone wants to change their tumblr icons so we can match hmu bc i'm 100% down with that

another pretty castle scene

SASSY MERLIN PLS

ok ik this is dumb to comment on because i feel like it's not tremendously hard to execute but i love the differences that colin made in regular merlin and fomorroh merlin. it's the best

they say it later in the episode but i find it hilarious how bad of an assassin merlin is

dude pls you're pouring poison in front of EVERYONE else?

BOG MAN. ok guys i'm calling you guys bog mans now.

ASLDJFALSDFJS THE JEALOUSY SCENE

i am cringey but laughing at the same time you don't understand why am i this childish

ok but arthur is being so sweet right here. i feel like he's not trying to be showy in front of gwen, i feel like he wants merlin to rest and that's so sweet. he's so patient right here and i love him

i miss the gwen and merlin friendship actually

dude merlin is roasting gaius so hard today

leon geeking out over weapons is so cute. omg he's such a tiny nerd i love him

laskjflasdfj THIS SCENE. this makes up for the stew jokes that i may or may not still be mad about

i love that the knights LITERALLY turn a blind eye it's actually hilarious

LOOK AT MERLIN BEING COMPETENT?? HE'S SO SMART WITH THE ARROW RIGGING THING

it's literally treason leon pls and you're laughing you're the best 😭😭

i wish we had a pervical back story arc

ok i think it's dumb that i laughed when merlin ducked but i stand by that

ok why do i feel bad for arthur a little. he's talking abt some semi-deep stuff. not deep deep but like, he's trying to ask for advice from his friend, his close advisor. he would've never talked to merlin like this is season 1-2 but here he is, talking about trust. and MERLIN is trying to MURDER HIM. yes. i admit it's a little funny when i'm just watching merlin trip over things and such, but when i listen to arthur talking i feel slightly sad

literallly. merlin's passed out on the floor and arthur doesn't even think anything is wrong

gwen's face when she knocked merlin out is so cute

oop. why is arthur standing in agravaine's door way like an absolute robot

cyes arthur. figure him out

i hate agravaine. i just want arthur to be happy. he's only trusting agravaine because agravaine is family.

stfu agravaine 'you're all that's left of my dear sister' SHUT THE FRONT DOOR

ok there's a repeat of the castle from earlier but i'll spare you

pls this bath scene is so awkward. tt not being able to trust anyone anymore and we're laughing at merlin but arthur's talking so sad and deep

pls this bath scene is so awkward. that's all the notes i have

again, i miss gwen and merlin

merlin is MONCHING on those berries. i'm craving berries now

ok but like. yk that pouch that gaius is using to make the forromoh dormant? what if merlin tucked it in his neckerchief as a precaution. i'm just saying.

aslfkjasdaskdjf the tavern

yall why did merlin have to stop his horse to drink the potion

i want the knights to have a cool band name or smth yk what i mean?

i like that merlin is still a little in the camelot red. it's not the same shade but yk what i mean

HAHA LEON AND PERCIVAL BEING PUSHED TOGETHER. I JUST KEPT ON SCREAMING SUBTEXT SUBTEXT

damn morgana wants RESUKTS. i dont blame her

the frist interaction with merlin and morgana in the hut is so awkward. pls.idek how to comment on it

deadass morgana's dress is so pretty.

magic fight! magic fight!

stfu 'rightfully mine' pls

hehe there's a leaf in his hair

ok i feel like i should've commented more on the magic fight but idk bro

so ik that colin was in this whole episode but it really only just now feels like merlin is here and i think that's fun

arthur is the cutest. i'm loving this dynamic you have no idea. i live live live live LIVE off banter. pls

guys i'm sad apparently i can only put 10 pics in a post but pls enjoy this one pic of arthur right here 😭

ok idk abt you but i'd love to hear jokes abt brass

agaragvaine pls die already

YOU'RE SUCH A PERV LITERALLY

GO

AWAY

NOW

dude that last scene was actually really pretty and i'm sad that i can't attach it now

anyways thanks for reading my long ass rambles. but i'll be back next week to the secret sharer i'll catch you on the flip side

[flowercrown-bucky]

The Secrets We Hide

Fandom: Marvel

Pairing: Loki x Reader

Warnings: Swearing

Summary: Loki has a secret. A big secret. When Thor needs his help finding Odin, his secret may be exposed.

Authors’ Note: My very favourite reader of my Loki series, Lavender Blue, asked for some more Thor, and whilst thinking about it I got a little carried away

Also Y/N has a last name in this that might make sense if you get to the end oop

If you’re waiting for the next part of Lavender Blue I fucking SUCK at writing smut someone help me-

"Where are we going, brother?" Thor looked curiously at Loki.

He'd been to Britain a handful of times in his life.

The very first had been sometime during what would later become colloquially know as the dark ages, in the early sixth century, he was inclined to believe. Earth, he had found, was wholly unremarkable, if England was anything to go by.

It was on this occasion that he had learned of his brother's magical talents, travelling on horseback through the countryside. He'd stumbled onto a (Remarkably small, he noticed) kingdom, ruled over by a gentleman by the name of Arthur. The real shock, however, had come to him upon entering the banquet hall in his host's castle, only to find his younger brother - who was, needless to say, not pleased to see him - sat next to his host. The lengths he'd gone to disguise himself were commendable, and the beard he'd magicked up was impressive, but there was no mistaking the mischievous twinkle in the eyes of Loki of Asgard.

However, the England Thor found himself in now was a far cry from the country of his memory. Winchester, he had been informed, was where the bifrost had brought them, but the cobbled streets he was walking on were about as unfamiliar to him as unicorn land.

Loki, however, definitely knew where he was. He had clearly been here many times before.

He'd replied to his brother's questioning with a disparaging look, continuing to walk on. All Thor knew about where they were going is that it had something to do with where Loki had placed their father three years ago. As for his personal theories? His mind was drawing a blank.

Eventually, Loki came to a stop in front of a single house within a terrace. A tall, unremarkable house, by all means, built with honey-coloured sandstone, the paint on the windows flaking with age, several panes baring the circular marks of a pontil. Three tall steps led to the front door, and the view of the living room through large window next to it allowing some insight as to the nature of its inhabitant.

Through the hazy glass, Thor could see a remarkably cluttered, disorganised room. A large leather armchair sat in the corner of the room, worn from use and decorated by a patchwork quilt. A similar rug lay on the wooden floor, a tapestry of fabric scraps. Opposite the TV was a grey cord sofa, upon which a number of odd and brightly coloured socks were strewn.

It was fairly safe to assume, Thor reckoned, that the inhabitant of this house - who was currently upstairs, based on the light coming through the window - was not his father.

So what the hell were they doing here?

Loki's three short raps of the knocker elicited a response from the house's inhabitant. They could hear them scurrying down the stairs and towards the door, and fumbling with the lock before opening it.

The woman on the other side was not what he was expecting.

The arrival of your visitors had come as somewhat of a shock to you, that much was apparent from your face. The second thing Thor noticed, was that you clearly knew Loki.

Your hair, slightly damp from the shower, was pulled up on top of your head, secured by a scrunchie, the deep green shade of which complimented your eyes. You were dressed simply in a pair of jeans and a red woollen jumper, your feet bare save for a silver ring around the second toe on your left foot and chipped nail polish on your toenails.

The third thing Thor noticed about you, was that you were very pretty.

"Father?" His voice came out as a squeak.

Out of the corner of his eye, he could see his brother laughing.

"Your father I most certainly am not." Your right eyebrow quirked bemusedly, crossing your arms. "But this is a surprise."

"Sorry, I must've forgotten to mention it." Loki grinned at you. "Can we come in?"

You stepped aside, beckoning the brothers through the door and into your home. You shot Loki a pointed look as he entered, prompting him to roll his eyes and, begrudgingly, remove his shoes and place them neatly by the door. In the interest of remaining polite, Thor followed suit.

"I take it this is not a social visit?" You asked, leading them into your kitchen.

The kitchen, Thor noticed, was nice. Homely. Small, but still, homely. The stone floor was cool under his socked feet, although his left being slightly warmer than the right led him to suspect your floor was central-heated, and the aga opposite him would probably heat the entire house. The beams supporting the ceiling were low enough that he'd hit his head twice, although he had noticed Loki had ducked, his posture automatically slouched so as to avoid collision.

Loki had clearly spent a lot of time in this house, in this kitchen.

You hopped up onto the counter, crossing your legs at the knee.

"Perceptive as ever, I see." Loki chuckled. "Although, my manners seem to have momentarily lost me. Y/N, this is my brother, Thor. Thor, this is Y/N Hudson. She's.... She's a friend of mine."

Thor did not miss the curious glance you shot at his brother.

"As delighted as I am to see you, Loki," You rolled your eyes. "What do you want?"

"It would seem that my dear brother has managed to lose our father." Thor glared at the dark haired man.

"I would dearly love to know how exactly one goes about losing one's father." Your lips quirked into an amused smile.

"And you're the only living being on this dull little planet who's capable of finding him." Loki ignored your attempt at riling him, catching your gaze.

"I don't understand." Thor furrowed his brow. "What are you, a witch? Do you have some sort of tracking abilities?"

"No, she's just very intelligent." Loki corrected. "Would you give Y/N and I a moment alone, brother mine?"

Thor nodded gruffly, watching you hop off the counter and walk out of the kitchen, into the room he'd first seen through the window.

He did not miss how his brother bit his lip as he looked you up and down.

Your front room was Loki's favourite place on Midgard.

It might even be his favourite place in the nine realms.

It had quickly become his bolt-hole, his safe place. It was the first place he'd ever been shown true kindness, where you'd brought him after you found him in a back alley, dying and alone. It was where you'd laid him on the sofa, where he'd been tucked under a blanket for the first time, where he'd drunk his first ever cup of midgardian tea. It was where you'd allowed him, a complete stranger, to rest and heal.

It was where he'd returned to pester this annoying, intriguing little human being, a process within which he discovered you were possibly less annoying and entirely more intriguing than he'd initially assumed.

He trailed his fingers across the back of your sofa absent mindedly, staring at the rings on your coffee table. You had a habit of leaving half-drunk, cold cups of coffee on this table - hence, the rings - something that irked him to no end.

The long hairs on the cushion caught his eye, and he wondered where the furry little beast might be hiding. Your cat, Kenneth, did not like Loki, a sentiment he wholeheartedly reciprocated. If you weren't so fond of it, he would more than happily fling the little monster into some unreachable pocket of a distant dimension.

His eyes reached where you'd perched on the arm of your armchair, one leg stretched out in front of you. He allowed his gaze to lazily climb the length of your body, taking all of you in.

Gods, did he love your legs.

"I've missed you, darling." He grinned up at you.

"I've not seen you for two weeks, Loki." Your voice was slow, deliberate. "And you come to me now, because you need me?"

He bit his lip, you had him there. He never was quite sure how to gauge your emotions, never sure how you’d react. Everything you did was carefully considered.

Even after all this time with you, you were still something of an enigma to him. It was one of the things that had initially drawn him to you, one of the things that he loved about you.

"On the contrary, my sweet." His voice had dropped, so much so that he was almost purring. "I always need you."

"Don't you try to charm me, silvertongue." You raised one finger in front of you, pointing it at him; a warning.

"Is it working?" He raised one eyebrow at you as he spoke.

"I'll let you know." You grumbled.

A soft chuckle left his lips, crossing the distance between you in two strides, dropping to his knees before your outstretched legs. He glanced up at you inquisitively, a massive grin stretching across his face at your nod of confirmation.

Gently, he lifted his hands up so his fingertips pressed at your stomach, at the little gap of skin between the bottom of your jumper and the waistband of your jeans. His fingers slid gently under your jumper, taking the woolen garment with it until his palms were flat against your stomach.

"Hey, little one." He cooed. "I can't believe how tiny you are. I can barely see you."

You laughed quietly, bringing your hand down to rest on top of his much larger one. He kissed the soft skin of your slightly swollen belly, and the intimacy of the small gesture made your heart swell with love and affection for both him and the child growing inside you.

"I wonder if they'll be blue." You mused, running your fingers through the ends of his hair.

"Why, in the name of all things unholy," He looked up from his ministrations. "Would it be blue?"

"Because, you're, well, you know..." You waved your hands expressively. "Nevermind. I had a scan a few days ago, do you want to see?"

You fished in your back pocket, pulling out a small folded piece of paper.

Desperation was not something Thor was used to.

However, in that moment, it was exactly what he as feeling.

He'd crossed his legs, he'd shifted his weight from leg to leg uncomfortably. But however hard he tried, he just could not shift the feeling. He needed to go to the toilet, and he needed to go to the toilet badly.

As the age-old saying went, when you gotta go, you gotta go.

He'd uncomfortably wandered towards where he'd seen you and his brother wander off to.

What he was not expecting to see, was Loki knelt between your legs.

His hands flew up to his face, shielding his view. He'd seen this before, and it scarred him for life.

What even had he seen? 

His brother, kneeling between the legs of a mortal woman. Your jeans, he noted, were entirely done up.

Loki was kissing your stomach, caressing it, a dark piece of paper clutched in his other hand.

"Your daddy loves you so, so much," His brother had whispered to your stomach. "But don't give your mummy too much grief, ok?"

Words escaped Thor.

This woman Loki had brought him to, was pregnant. With Loki's child.

He cleared his throat, startling both you and his brother. Loki scrambled to his feet, anxious about being caught in such an intimate moment with you.

"I needed the toilet." Thor's voice came out in a much higher pitch than his intention.

"On your left."  Loki's voice was barely a croak, his voice hoarse.

"I'm okay," His voice came out in a more nervous way than he was expecting. "Congratulations are in order, I think?"

"Yes." Loki's voice was gruff, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. "Thank you, brother."

"Thank you, Thor." You smiled warmly at the god.

"Anyway," Loki was evidently in a hurry to change the subject. "Do you know where the Allfather is?"

"He's in Norway. That's all I know. He's hidden himself well." You rubbed your chin thoughtfully. "But I do know a man who might be able to tell you more."

Loki's lips curled into a satisfied grin.

Thor's state of confusion remained long after they left your house. He was, as the mortals would say, totally gobsmacked.

Unable to provide the location of Odin, you'd handed Loki a neatly folded piece of paper. As far as Thor knew, his brother had not yet opened it.

Loki had kissed you passionately before he left, an uncharacteristic display of affection and one that made Thor deeply uncomfortable. He'd cleared his throat in a pitiful attempt to stifle a laugh, met only by his brother's middle finger in his face.

Rude.

He glanced at his brother as they walked. He'd not said a word since they’d left, but his hair was mussed from your fingers and his cheeks flushed from your embrace.

“I’m shocked.” He mused. “A woman - an attractive woman - likes you.”

“Harsh.” Loki frowned. “And she didn’t, at first. Like me, that is.”

“Smart woman.” He chuckled, eliciting a punch from the taller of the two.

In his many, many years of existence, he would never have guessed that Loki would be the first of the two of them to become a dad. He never would’ve even imagined his brother as a father in his wildest dreams.

In all honesty, he had never imagined a woman taking Loki as her lover.

He shuddered at the mental image. Yeugh.

“Congratulations, I guess.” A sudden fondness overwhelmed him. “Dad.”

“They are everything to me.” Loki’s voice was clear, concise in a way he had never before heard from his mischievous brother - he was, after all, the God of Lies. “I would gladly give my life to save theirs. I’d give yours, for that matter.”

“Your sentiment is touching.” He grunted. “Anyway, where are we even going, brother?”

He turned to his suit-clad little brother, watching him withdraw the piece of folded paper from his pocket. He unfolded it carefully, revealing your delicate, printed writing.

S. Holmes

221B, Baker Street, London.

[yandere-sins]

Preparations

Yantober List! Feel free to participate at any point :3

Time to move! Ah, Yantober is almost over. I think I will kind of miss it and at the same time not at all. I am thinking of binding the story of Rhys into a book for myself, however, maybe someone else is interested? Perhaps I should do an interest check for it sometime... I am not sure yet, hmmm. But first of all, I have to end the story right? So let’s continue ^-^

»»————————————  ♡ ————————————«« 

Looking fondly at the first couple-picture you two ever took, Rhys laid it down on top of the wrapping paper after a few moments. You two looked so in love, despite your eyes still being puffed from crying a lot in the beginning time over your dear friend. Ever since he knew you, you had been such a sensitive soul, and he fell in love with that feature of you long before you even recognized him.

It would go to the fragile things, he decided, reaching for the cooking ware next.

Finally, it was time to move! There was no way Rhys could hide his excitement about that anymore, talking about it constantly. However, right now, he did his best to be quiet. You had just settled in and fallen asleep after taking your meds, so he didn’t want to risk waking you. Still, stuff had to be packed, things had to be sorted out, there wasn’t any time to waste.

Rhys allowed himself a small glance at your tranquil sleeping face, your chest rising and falling rhythmically with your breath. After almost a week, he had decided to change your arms’ position, going back to the bindings at the headboards, so now, you really looked like a baby. His little baby. Cute, adorable, tired, and worn out. Rhys loved you so much.

Gently, he sorted through what he wanted to bring from his old apartment to the new house. Undoubtedly, your parents and his parents too would be more than happy to send presents like pots and cutlery. Perhaps, even a few of your old friends would send their regards after the move. It’s been a while since either of you saw them, but Rhys liked to keep in contact, having told them that you two took some time off after the death of your friend.

You’d probably be thrilled to see them again if they ever came to visit. The new home wasn’t anywhere close to the college, but perhaps in a year or two, when you had settled in by the ocean and behaved well, he’d invite them for a weekend. Rhys only ever thought about your well-being, of course, and seeing your old friends might be good for your mental health.

Smiling to himself, Rhys felt proud of being such a good boyfriend to you, while he decided against bringing a lot of cookware. Most of it had burn marks anyway or started to rust, so there was no use bringing it along. How nice would it be if you decided to cook for him again in the future. He missed all the great things and small snacks you could provide. Sometimes you’d try something new entirely, and it would burn, but even your pout was cute, and he remembered hugging out your frustration with you until take-out arrived. Those memories, Rhys was very fond of.

Aside from essential necessities, there wasn’t much left in the apartment that reminded anyone of people actually living in it. Most of his stuff, Rhys had packed up already, putting the boxes into the corners. Mementos and things he deemed memorable for your relationship were little. You two had a lot more photos standing around, framed, or even things that you bought on trips in the past. But when you had your rowdy phase, you destroyed a lot of them. Rhys never resented you for it, but it made him a little sad not having much to remember your college time by since they were gone now.

The only thing left was the last drawer on the cabinet. Once, Rhys had just left it empty, but when you practically moved in with him, you used it for things that you brought from your childhood home, those you couldn’t let go of despite not really needing them in your life. Being close to the bed, Rhys tried to open it especially tenderly, but it squeaked as it moved, your eyelids slowly fluttering open.

“Hey there, sleepy head~” Instantly, Rhys was by your side, cooing to you to go back to sleep since you really needed it. A yawn escaped you, absolutely adorably, while you let your head be gently caressed, Rhys leaning onto the mattress to be on the same level as you, watching you fondly. You looked at him dazed and tired, before your view fell on the drawer, pupils dilating as you saw your stuff. Immediately, you were wide awake, childlike excitement glistening in your eyes, nostalgic feelings erupting. “Are those mine?” you asked, hands straining in their restraints to lift you up and see better.

“Yeah, I was just about to put them into boxes.”

“Can I see them?” your question came out of nowhere, your eyes actually looking at him for once in anticipation. This was a sincere request, something you hadn’t asked in a while. Rhys’s heart began to flutter, experiencing you really wanting something from him, and not just your usual wish for him to let you go.

He left the bed, giving you a quick hesitant glance again, wanting to see if you really meant it, asking him for a favor. But you caught his eyes immediately, showing no ill-will in them towards him, just honest desire to see your stuff. Reaching for the first, best thing that he could grip, he pulled out an old, worn-out photo album. With his back leaned against the bedframe, he held it so that you two could look into it, Rhys never having seen the inside of it before either. Surely, he wanted to, but you two postponed it until this very moment.

A fond smile danced onto your lips as you looked at the old photographs of your mom and dad, holding you as a baby. You, eating puree. You, swimming with inflatable armbands and too big goggles in a pool. You, on your first day of school. All those old memories were saved in here, and it almost brought tears to Rhys’s eyes as you told him a few things you remembered on occasion while he skimmed through the album with you.

“That’s Alex,” you whispered, remorsefully. A shade laid over your expression, teeth grinding and body tensing as photographs of two little kids appeared. They showed you two playing in the dirt, at the graduation, eating in a restaurant on vacation. The longer it went on, the quieter you got. You two became older, there were fewer pictures on the last pages than on the beginning. The last one seemed like you two as teenagers, on some kind of party, grinning like Rhys had never seen you smile before. This was a different happy.

A happy that Rhys couldn’t achieve.

Slowly, he closed the book, letting it sink to his lap. Aside from the ticking of the clock, there was silence in the room until you turned your head back straight and sighed. You sniffled one time, and Rhys didn’t want to find out why. If you were crying about Alex now, he didn’t want to know it.

“Hey… do you need this still?” he asked, waving the album in his hand. “We don’t… really need to keep it, right?”

Rhys got up, working to pull out the full drawer. He knew what you were feeling, even without looking at you. You were well aware that he wouldn’t discuss this, that he was about to discard all of those precious memories of your childhood like they were nothing more than trash. It broke your heart, and at the same time, you were giving up the hope that he’d understand you and have mercy on your things.

For a few moments, he looked through your belongings. Some headphones, the album, a few more loose photos of you and Alex. Those were nothing you’d easily get back ever again, and there was no way to make new ones either. It hurt him too, you know? It hurt him, knowing that you were hurt. But it wasn’t good for your relationship to keep any of it.

Just a little stuffed rabbit, about the size of his palm, caught his attention, and he fished it out. Walking over to you, he saw the silent tears, even though your head was turned away, and your eyes closed. The more you suffered, the less Rhys wanted to admit it was because of him, but his gut still clenched together tightly in sympathy for you. Placing the tiny animal on the bed next to your head, he didn’t wait for you to see it, taking out the ‘trash’ immediately and leaving you behind to pity your loss alone.

Soon, the preparations would be done, and you two would move into your new life. There, nothing of the old life, of Alex, and those things that made you sad would linger around. You’d make a new life, new memories, and find new things to keep that strictly belonged to you two. Things would get easier, Rhys told himself, over and over, like a mantra. Everything would become perfect.

He barely hesitated as he dumped the drawer into the big garbage can of the complex. When his eyes fell onto the album again, he scoffed, promising it quietly to return with a lighter in the evening. Rhys couldn’t risk there being anything in the way of your new life, even if he had to hurt you again. It was just another attest of his love.

Once your new life rolled around, he hoped, you’d understand that too.

Continue

[stuckony-summer-stocking]

Treat Instructions!

The fills have been posted! 90 incredible Stuckony stories for you to enjoy!

For the next week while you enjoy guessing who made them all, we’re encouraging you to put extra treats in people’s stockings. You can do this in two ways: Discord or Tumblr. 

Below the cut, you’ll find a list of the folks who have requested treats linked to their tumblr stocking post. You can reply to/reblog the Tumblr stocking post and share the treat there! 

Or!

You can head over to Discord and share it there. You can do this through DM if the person allows, or @ the recipient on our STB Enthusiasts 18+ Discord server if both of you are there. (Are you? You should be! We’re guessing who created the amazing fills over there all week!) We’ve created a special channel - #stocking-party - just for this purpose.

Treats do not need to be Marvel or Stuckony-themed, but they certainly can be! Here are a few examples for how to make someone’s day even brighter: fic comments, gifs, pictures of animals, recipes, moodboards, and Flame really likes being told she’s pretty - just to name a few. Exactly like the fills, this is open to everyone and anyone who wants to make someone’s day.

Anyone who signed up for a stocking - be sure to check your stocking post for treats! Treats are open until October 3rd. But if you want to keep sending love to each other after that, well, we’re not going to stop you!

Treats are CLEARLY LABELED on the stocking posts as treats, so please be careful to follow wishes carefully! Click through the readmore for the full list of treat requests or click here for the archive of stocking posts.

betheflame - "I love gifs, and jokes, and anything to do with any of my fanworks. Puppies are just joy in photo form to me."

FestiveFerret - "I love allllll animals, especially ferrets. I cook, knit, crochet, and garden. I love pictures of pretty yarn, kind messages, anything to do with any of my fanworks, puzzles and brain teasers."

HogwartsToAlexandria - "Moodboards! Playlists! Love notes! (🥺) Fun pics and thirsty ones! Snippets of your own headcanons about the boys! Additional prompts you think are great! Reclists of shortish fics (anything over 3k I'm less likely to read, sorry!) Links to artsy time-lapses (they're a drug of mine..) and anything that came across your dash you think I might like. Commenting on your favorite of my fics if there's any you like. Stick figure drawings about anyhing at all... I just love gifts 🥺😍💕"

ashes0909 

Bill_Longbow - "Mini Avengers cross stitch patterns"

hundredthousands - "Fanart, moodboards or headcanons of any of my prompts or likes would be loved!"

Corsets_and_Cardigans - "Moodboards, Baking recipes, anything fall or Halloween themed, pictures of cute animals. I knit, sew, cross stitch, and bake, anything themed there."

RedToni - "musicals, books, sims, social work, singing, baking"

DepressingGreenie - "Chickens. Secretary birds. Gardening (I'm particularity fond of: food gardening, native Australian food plants, Food Forests, cottage style gardens, and heirlooms plants). Dragons/Wyverns + other mythological creatures. Snakes with arms or hats... or both. Puns. ...and anything to do with any of my fanworks."

Wiggle - "moodboards, I haven't put up prompt or ask posts in forever come hmu, headcanons, stick figure art, wild AU ideas, gifs of the boys, puppies, and anything to do with my fics/writing"

realityfallsapart - "I do like to bake 👀👀"

Fearlesslexi - "I love pit bulls and reptiles so pictures of those would be amazing"

willidothefandango (nagth) - "Movie and podcasts recommendations (anything mysterie and science fiction themed) and pics of cute cats and dogs (specially weiner dogs!) are all appreciated"

RoseRose - "Kitty pictures are awesome! Really, any adorable animal picture. Dragon pictures. Anything to do with any of my fanworks. Silly headcanons are also fun! Also, fic recs!"

JimmieJive - "I don't quite get this section but, SNAKES, I love snakes. Actually any cute animals are great. Was thinking of trying cross stitch so any beginner patterns are cool too." "

Ruquas - ""I love recipes. You have a recipe that you absolutely adore and would eat only if it was socially acceptable? I would love to try it. And pictures of landscapes. Doesn’t matter from where, with water or without, with animals or without, but I love landscapes"""

Skeeter_110 - "Moodboards, art of any kind, recipes, prompts"

JacarandaBanyan - "Moodboards are always fun!"

goindownshipping - "I love to cook! If you have any go-to recipes, I'd love to try them out. I'm not picky!"

newtypeshadow - "Fanart, foxes and kitsune, wolves and werewolves, dragons, funny pics and gifs, cute animals, anything to do with my fics, recs, headcanons, marvel meta."

Not_Crazy_Just_a_Fangirl - " translations of my fics, book recs, pokemon, fanart, song lists, recipes, dnd oneshots?, anything really"

justanotherpipedream - "I love to cook and always love trying new recipes! Puzzles, animals, gif sets, cat/dog videos, fun crafts, colouring pages."

mayamoksin - "Art would be cool. :) Also interesting but simple baking recipes. Any minimalist tattoo designs would be awesome to see. Maybe an idea for a new tumblr username."

Dodo - "sewing patterns for plushies, and cookie and pie recipes."

asphxdels - "moodboards, playlists"

nativemossy - "PLEASE send me pics of your pets or advise for my garden lol"

ABrighterDarkness - "I love, love, love foxes! I mean, I love animals period but foxes are <3 <3 <3. Moodboards, gifs, anything to do with my fics/writing, got any one-pan/pot-wonder recipes to share? I also love reading and learning the 'weird but true' type fun facts/trivia!" "

Huntress79 - "- cooking recipes (only in German and/or English, please), from wherever in the world you are! - cute pics of baby kittens, dolphins - knitting and/or crochet patterns (again, only in German or English, please)"

Publisher021 - "Mood boards"

iam93percentstardust - "Moodboards! Playlists! Prompts! Cats! Foxes!"

Faustess - "Funny or fandom cross stitch, lower carb recipes, cats, owls, moodboards, gifsets, memes - all kinds of stuff!"

MercurialMagpie - "my favorite animals are foxes, cats of any type, and Western dragons"

seleneaurora - "art, recs, cute animals"

Aquatigermice - "I like dogs, fish (Bettas), Tsums tsums, cake, tigers, snow and coloring sheets." "

OddConfection - "- I am always looking for new things to bake, so recipes are welcome! - Dark fairy tale/witch aesthetic - The moon/space - Mythical creatures. - Libraries"

MassiveSpaceWren - "Recs for the things I like, recs for TV series that are nice to watch without super much attention (for example while drawing). Anything with feathered dinosaurs."

groffiction - "love crafts, art of any kind, stuffed animals, drawing, stickers, horses, cats, dogs, wolves, etc."

lokivsanubis - "fresh laundry, betting on random things, dogs."

LadyUkkey - "Art~! Playlists! Stories!"

[horansqueen]

You & Me : chapter 32

A Niall Horan fanfiction ; rated MA

Sequel to AM CONVERSATIONS

CHAPTER 1 || CHAPTER 2 || CHAPTER 3 || CHAPTER 4 || CHAPTER 5 || CHAPTER 6 || CHAPTER 7 || CHAPTER 8 || CHAPTER 9 || CHAPTER 10 || CHAPTER 11 || CHAPTER 12 || CHAPTER 13 || CHAPTER 14 || CHAPTER 15 || CHAPTER 16 || CHAPTER 17 || CHAPTER 18 || CHAPTER 19 || CHAPTER 20 || CHAPTER 21 || CHAPTER 22 || CHAPTER 23 || CHAPTER 24 || CHAPTER 25 || CHAPTER 26 || CHAPTER 27 || CHAPTER 28 || CHAPTER 29 || CHAPTER 30 || CHAPTER 31

NOTES:

-one chapter is her pov, the next is his. -4.5k -im sorry, i never proofread, i hate it. -there WILL be smut. but not only smut. -this is a romance, comedy, smut story. -for the summary, check my MASTERLIST.

- notes: i tried to find a good gif for this of him right before a show and i couldnt. i know some exist but its almost 7am and im tired lol so yea.

if you want to be on the list of blogs i notify when this is updated, just message me :)

requests! :i love the requests you guys send me theyre amazing! thank you! 💖

Chapter 32 : Her chapter

OLIVIA

March 10,2018

I kept playing with my fingers and glancing at the door as I waited for Dylan to arrive. My foot started shaking under the table and I kept checking my phone to see if Niall had sent me a message or anything. I knew he was busy and I wasn't expecting him to call but I knew it would be awkward if he did while I was with Dylan. It was the very first time we were seeing each other since I broke up with him in Italy and I still felt like crap for the way I had treated him. I knew I was the bad guy in the story and I didn't even want to pretend otherwise. I took the blame, literally all of it, but I couldn't pretend I regretted it. It was better to stop things then, than to keep this game going on. I wouldn't have been able to resist Niall anyway and the whole cheating thing was not for me. It only made me feel like shit.

The door tinged and my head moved up so quickly I could have snapped my neck. He was there and I held my breath but when his eyes met mine, the smile he sent me made something stir in my stomach. Did I really break up with this guy?

I got up and he walked closer. I felt his hand on my upper arm as he kissed my cheeks before we both sat down, facing each other. He called the waitress and asked for water and a meal while I took my glass of wine and brought it to my lips. I needed it to survive this conversation because I felt like it was about to get heavy. I didn't know how he felt or what he thought, and somehow, I was scared. I didn't want him to hate me and at the same time, I couldn't blame him if he did.

We hadn't talked at all and he hadn't said anything mean about me, at least nothing I had heard about, but it wasn't really surprising. It was not his type to shittalk other people. It was also not his type to share his personal life or anything. I frowned, realizing he had quite a few things in common with Niall and that, perhaps, I had a type.

"How are you?" he asked in a soft tone, leaning his forearms on the table and crossing his fingers together.

I sent him a small smile and titled my head. "I'm... i'm okay, and you?"

"Oh, I'm good."

I nodded and started nibbling on my bottom lip from stress. He noticed and I saw the left corner of his lips raise up slightly as his lips twisted into a small smile.

"No need to be nervous, you know." he explained. "It's me. Just me. You've seen me naked before, and you've seen me with food on my face. Pretty sure you also heard me when I went to the bathroom. You're safe."

I laughed and shook my head, pressing my lips together. He was always so funny and I just nodded. I had no idea why, but I suddenly felt like everything would be alright. I knew Dylan, and i knew the kind of man he was, and I trusted him.

"Thanks, I just didn't want things to be awkward between us. We didn't really talk since that day in Italy and I was not sure... how you felt, and what you thought." I tilted my head, staring in his eyes, and I smiled at the incredible shade of brown they were. It made me think of how blue Niall's eyes were and how much I missed them. "We're filming together today and.. I don't know, is there any way we can make this less awkward or.. more comfortable?"

His smile turned into a sad one and he nodded slowly. "That's why you wanted to meet." he pointed out, as if he was realizing something that he didn't enjoy. He sighed and rubbed on of his eyes before slipping his hand in his hair and leaning against the chair. "We're both professionals, I mean, I was not going to start any trouble, Liv. I love working on this tv show. That's why I messaged you the first time."

I chuckled and raised my eyebrows, using a teasing tone. "Oh? I thought that was because you saw me act and thought you just had to meet me!" I joked with a small chuckle.

He shook his head slightly and looked away before sighing again.

"The truth is yea, I did message you at first because you caught my eyes. I mean, it's something that emanated from you in all those videos. Through the camera you were just.. I can't explain. I don't know many people who can just send that kind of vibe through a camera, but you did." he admitted, making me frown slightly. That was something he had never told me before and I was in shock. "The show was interesting, of course, but you were the reason why I messaged you. I wanted to act with you. But I watched that tv show because it was good."

My lips curled and then parted slightly. "You... you thought I was a good actress?" I asked, not expecting that and making him chuckle.

"You think it's surprising?"

"Well, yea." I shrugged, looking down at my hands. "I've never really done anything, i'm just a boring french girl who didn't learn acting in school or anything. I didn't think anyone would actually try to act with me, at least not someone like you."

"Someone like me?" he asked with a smirk. "What kind of person am I, exactly?"

"Fishing for compliments?" I asked with a small laugh.

"Or just curious, you know me."

I tilted my head but sent him a fond smile before licking my lips and clearing my throat. We got our meals just as I was about to answer and finally, I asked for an other glass of wine, taking a mental note to stop after that or I'd have a hard time to film my scenes.

"I mean, you can't deny that you're popular. And yea, you're pretty hot, but people actually like you for your talent. Your good look is just a bonus. You can't blame a nobody like me for being starstruck."

"Oh so you were starstruck when we met?" he asked with a chuckle.

"From the day I got your tweet, until that time we sang together after an 18 hours of filming." I admitted. "I was starstruck the whole time."

"That's the first night we had sex." he pointed out, making my smile grow as I nodded.

"It was."

"So you were not starstruck when you saw me naked? I'm offended."

This time, i let out a louder laugh, letting my head fall slightly on my shoulders before looking back in his eyes. I felt reassured that we would just get along, even if we weren't dating anymore, and I wouldn't let anyone else make things awkward between us.

"The truth?" I asked, raising my eyes as his eyes moved from his plate to my face. "I wouldn't say starstruck but... impressed, yea."

"I know right? That's what all the girls say." he joked, making me laugh and shake my head before rolling my eyes.

"I saw a few rumors about you and Jody." I pointed out. "I know you're not with her but, are you seeing anyone?"

It took him a while to answer and he finally pushed his plate away and grabbed his glass, taking a long sip of water before shaking his head a bit. He was avoiding my eyes but I knew him well enough to guess he was probably trying to formulate an answer correctly in his head before letting it out. He was a funny and sensitive guy, and he had tact, which I greatly appreciated.

"I'm only talking for me, but honestly, I can not get over a break up that easily, and I don't really want to date anyone right now." he looked up in my eyes and sighed. "This is no surprise if I tell you I'm not over you, right? I mean I was ready to marry you, Olivia. This is not something you just brush away and move on from in the spam of a few weeks."

I felt extremely guilty and when he stopped talking, I held my breath and pressed my lips together. There was no right answer to this and I decided to keep quiet, only letting out the air from my lungs when the waitress came with my glass of wine. I thanked her and after she left, I took a very long sip of it before putting it back on the table. I couldn't pretend I was totally over the break up with Dylan but at the same time, I had Niall, and with him, nothing else seemed to matter, or almost. I didn't want to blindly love him the way I used to before, but I couldn't pretend I was not happy in his arms.

"I'm sorry I asked." I said in a low tone, clearing my throat. "I mean, it wouldn't be any of my business anyway."

Quickly, Dylan brought the discussion back to the show and the scenes we were about to do together and we started laughing again. I had no idea how he did it, but he could always turn an awkward situation into a comfortable one. That was why it was always so easy to be around him.

We paid for our food and walked out of the restaurant as he checked his watch.

"We're supposed to be there in half an hour." he let out, looking around the parking. "You need a ride or you got your own car?"

I raised my nose up. "I planned on taking a cab. I hate driving back when we're done filming, i'm always so tired."

He raised his eyebrows and pointed his car with both hands, his keys hanging from one. I chuckled and rolled my eyes, moving my head a bit before deciding that it was just a car ride and we were going at the same place anyway. It reminded me that Dylan was always my ride home when we filmed the first season and that's one of the things that had brought us closer. We would always chat about what had happened on the set or laugh at each other for the mistakes we made that would be good bloopers. The first time we kissed was in his car, and I remembered like it was yesterday. It was the first time someone made me feel as strongly as that after Niall. Or even before. In fact, I could remember clearly why I wanted to marry Dylan.

He handed me his phone so I could choose the songs that would play while he was driving and when we got there, we walked inside together without really thinking about it. Not many people noticed but those who did sent me a weird look or a surprised smile but I just said hi and left, not wanting to discuss it at all. Sometimes, I forget that people in general love gossips, and that it's not just the paps I need to hide from.

Gladly, no one dared asking me questions and when I was ready to play the scene, I felt nervous all of a sudden. Dylan walked to me with a frown and bent down slightly, giving me a whiff of his deodorant. It made me smile and he whispered.

"Why so nervous?"

"We're supposed to kiss." I pointed out in a murmur, feeling slightly embarrassed by my own words and fear.

"Yea, we did that plenty of time." he replied back. "Relax, it's not even intimate, you know it, there's 25 persons with us on the set."

He was right and I breathed in and out to get some courage. I just thought it was different to kiss someone for a tv show when I was single versus when I was not. It made something jump in my chest when I remembered I was technically still single and for some reason, it didn't sit right with me. I suddenly wanted to be official with Niall. To fly back to Ireland right now and tell him I wanted to be his girlfriend. It was not a rational thought and I pushed it back, trying to focus on the scene I was about to be in. I was still not used to being an actress and I didn't know that much about all of it yet, but I knew that if I wanted to keep doing this job, I would probably have to kiss other people at some point. Perhaps, after a few years, it wouldn't be much of a deal anymore. Hopefully.

Everything went well and I tilted my head while biting my bottom lip as I looked at Dylan. It was incredible how 'in character' he could get and he sighed, raising his eyebrows up as he kept saying his text.

"You know you drive me crazy?"

I smiled proudly and shook my head. "My goal in life!"

I saw him take a few steps my way quickly and it couldn't have been more different than our first kiss was. This on-screen kiss was quick and hard and although it was totally different than the kisses we used to share in private, it still brought a bunch of memories of us in my brain. It was hard to think he was not thinking about the time we spent together too and when his hands reached the sides of my shirt near my waist, I shut my eyes tighter. He gripped my shirt in his fists and I kept my eyes closed when we stopped kissing before he brushed his nose against mine.

The first kiss I had had with Dylan was shy at the beginning and deep after a while. This one didn't come close to the real deal but I guess when feelings are involved, it's always stronger.

"That was the only way I could think about to shut you up." he whispered as I nodded slowly.

"Mm, I can't think of a better way."

He chuckled and I did too, my eyes fluttering open and I couldn't help but blink a few times when my gaze met his. I knew it was all acting but it felt weird to play that scene with him anyway. I sent him a smile and chuckled low and when I heard the 'cut!' I breathed out as all the stress evacuated from my body.

"You're fucking good at this, Olivia." Dylan just complimented me, making me smile a bit.

He patted my shoulder and I checked the time on my phone, grimacing when I realized Niall was probably not done with his show. I wanted to check the video he promised he would do while opening my envelop but I felt like it was too personal and decided I would wait until I was back home.

The rest of the scenes we were supposed to do went fast. Dylan was an incredibly good actor and a hard-working man. He rarely missed his lines or forgot his text and I always tried to be as good and professional as he was. It was crazy but he turned out to be a model for me but I had never taken the time to tell him.

He brought me back home and I was slightly sad when I realized I couldn't ask him to drop me at Niall's. It would make things so awkward and although I knew I could just take my car and drive there, It was way too late for that.

"Thanks so much for the ride, Dyl." I smiled and tilted my head. "I appreciate it."

"You're welcome, babe." I raised my nose up and he chuckled. "Okay, no cute names, I get it."

I waited a few seconds and licked my lips. "I never thanked you for teaching me so much about acting. So thank you. I look up to you a lot. I aspire to be as good as you are."

He sent me a smile but there was something in his eyes that I couldn't seem to decipher. Slowly, he nodded and I grabbed my purse, turning to him again.

"I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Sure, do you want me to pick you up?"

My lips parted and I took a few seconds to think. I really needed to talk to Niall about it, or else I would feel like I was lying to him, and I hated that.

"Oh, uhm, sure. Thanks, text me?"

He nodded and I got out of the car and I glanced at him a few times, knowing he would wait until I was safe and sound inside to actually leave. I waved at him and closed the door behind me, surprised that Louis was still awake and mostly, that he was alone.

"Hey my queen, how was the filming?" he asked without even looking at me.

"Nice." I admitted, taking my shoes off and walking up to the couch, letting myself fall next to him.

He moved his arm on the back of the couch, near my neck and I leaned my head against it.

"Tired?" he asked, finally turning to look at me as I nodded. "Go to bed, then. There's a gift waiting for you on your bed."

"A gift?" I asked, raising my eyebrows and sitting back up, suddenly interested. "From who?"

"Yours truly. I literally ordered it on ebay."

I frowned when I saw his smirk and felt my heart skip a beat. What stupid thing had he done again? I rushed to my room and opened the door but I stopped dead in my track and my jaw dropped. I walked slowly to my bed and chuckled before making a grimace. I grabbed the cushion and turned around only to see Louis, his hands in his pockets and leaning on the door frame as he sent me a bigger smirk.

"Are you fucking serious?" I chuckled, shaking the cushion with Niall's face on it. "He's like 18 on that damn picture!"

"More like 20. And hey, I picked one where you can actually take the cover off and wash it in the machine. If you want to... you know."

My eyes got bigger and I walked quickly to him as I hit him a few times with the cushion, making laugh even more as he tried to dodge my hits with his elbows and hands.

"What? You're gonna ride it, won't you?"

I started hitting him harder with it and he laughed more as he started running away. I followed him to the living room and raised my nose up again when I saw his smirk.

"You know what, Louis? I will. I'll ride that cushion naked, my damn cunt right on his face, and you'll know I'll do it because I'll fucking scream his name!"

His smile faltered and It made mine grow. "Yea about that, darling, you can wait 'til I'm out to do that yeah?"

"Yea, I don't think so." 

He groaned and I laughed. "Good night, Louis!"

I didn't wait for his answer and walked back to my room, closing and locking the door behind myself. I took a very quick shower and when I finally got under the covers, I quickly checked the instagram I made for us. My heart jumped in my chest and my lips curled when I saw the first video posted. I licked my lips and finally clicked on it as Niall started talking. He looked amazing and just seeing him made me tear up.

"Hey my love." he started with a smile. He was totally ready to go on stage and it made me smile. He had his guitar and his ear monitors and I could see he was close to the stage. He had put his phone on something and was smiling so big that it made my smile grow too. "I fucking miss you. The flight was horrible, you know."

The truth was, he should have left probably a day earlier but we didn't really want to be separated. Now, however, he was jet lagged and tired and I felt a bit guilty about that.

"Okay so, I'm in Ireland and I wish you were here with me. Let's see what your note says." He quickly ripped off the side and I groaned. I didn't know why but watching someone open something in a way I didn't feel was the right one always bothered me. He took the paper out and I saw his face change and his lips part in surprise.

"Jesus Christ this smells like you!" he let out a bit louder. "How did you do that, petal?"

I chuckled alone in the darkness of my room and squirmed a bit as he read the words quickly, his facial expression changing as his eyes moved on the paper. He looked up and shook his head.

"I thought about you the whole flight, Liv." he admitted. "You're in all my thoughts too, lovely. I'm about to go sing a bunch of songs about you and damn, it's not gonna be easy. You call me as soon as you come back home okay? You step foot in the damn house and you pick your phone. I need to hear your voice. I love you."

The video stopped and I raised my eyebrows, quickly hitting on his name to facetime him. It took him half a second to answer and I chuckled. Seeing his face made me want to literally cry.

"Pet, fucking finally!" he let out, making me chuckle. "Hey, your hair's wet, you're in bed... you didn't call me as soon as you got home like I asked! Wait, is that your bed?"

I breathed in and sighed. "Yea I'm sorry I just watched your video. And I'm home because Dylan gave me a ride, so I couldn't really ask him to bring me back to your place."

Niall groaned and I sent him a sad smile, tilting my head.

"I wish he knew that you're with me now." he shook his head. "I know we're not... together but, you know..."

"I know, Nee. I know."

We stared at each other for a while, just happy to talk to each other live and after a while, I pressed my lips together and started the conversation again.

"So how was your show?"

"Great. Fucking amazing, in fact." he admitted, playing with his hair and making my heart twist in my chest. I wish I could slide my fingers in his hair, too. "I'll be in Dublin tomorrow."

My face changed and I sat up. "Are you gonna go through Mullingar?"

"Probably."

I held my breath and my lips parted slightly.

"If you see someone I know-"

"Yea, I'll call you."

My eyes fluttered and I finally found my smile back, leaning against the wall behind me. I could spend hours just sitting in bed, facetiming with him but keeping silence. Just knowing he was there was enough for me.

"Is there a secret written in every envelop you wrote or was it just for the first one?" he asked, a smirk forming on his lips.

I felt my cheeks burn slightly and nibbled on my bottom lip, making him laugh.

"It was not a secret just... something I never told you."

"Well if you want to tell me of all the times you masturbated thinking about me, please I'd love it." he explained, making me hide my face with my free hand. "Make a list and send it to me. I'll do that same."

"God you're impossible!" I laughed, rolling my eyes. "You tell a guy you rode his pillow one time in the morning when he was out for a run and suddenly you're naughty!"

"You are naughty, Liv." he laughed too. "Are you gonna show me?"

"Mm, Maybe."

We stared at each other for a few minutes and it made me realize how much lighter I felt whenever Niall was around. I knew he was not physically there at that moment but I still felt better, calmer and happier. It made me realize that I was in a perpetual state of stress since he had left and I felt even lighter now than after that kissing scene with Dylan. No one could make me feel good the way Niall did.

"It's morning there?" I asked as he nodded.

"It's 10 in the morning. Which means it's about 2am where you are? Go to bed, petal, you need a rest."

"Aren't you glad that I waited to call you? I probably would have woken you up!"

"You did." he pointed out with a soft smile. "That was the plan. I wanted to wake up seeing your face, sort of like you were here with me. Fuck, I wish you were here with me."

I felt myself tear up and tried to swallow my tears but it was too hard. I blinked a few times and a few tears slid down my cheeks. I didn't even try to stop them, I just kept staring at Niall until he frowned and shook his head.

"Pet, please, don't." he sat and his phone moved as I tried to stop a sob from escaping my lips and when he appeared on the screen again, he was rubbing his eyes with his thumb and forefinger and I held my breath when I realized he was crying too. "We'll be together soon enough, okay?"

He breathed in and I heard him sob slightly, making me bring my hand to my mouth as I nodded. "Mmhm yes." I whispered, trying to swallow my tears and pain.

It had only been a day and it was already tough. I had no idea how we'd go through weeks without each other but it scared the shit out of me. I brought my hand to my phone and let my fingertip run on his cheek, over the screen. It was ridiculous but I was desperate for his touch. I just wanted to be in his arms, just a few seconds, I would have done anything.

He chuckled sadly but his eyes were still red and I knew I probably looked the same. "I put your note under my pillow and now it smells like you." he admitted. "You're not physically with me, Olivia, but you're in my head and my heart okay?"

I nodded quickly. "You're in mine, too."

"We've always been connected, you and me." he added, licking his lips. "Nothing is ever going to change that, and certainly not distance. I fucking love you, petal."

"I love you too." I whispered before repeating it louder. "I fucking love you too, Niall."

[ultramarcypan]

tradition

Arlo x Female Builder

It’s just a short little drabble I did for a friend, but I figured I could share!  I’ve played like 5 mines of My Time at Portia so I did have to do some research for this; warning that it may be OOC lmao.

It's been a strange year.   Good, all things considered she thinks, especially since she'd sailed to Portia on a whim to take over the decrepit workshop Pa had left her.  And workshop was also a generous term for the plot of land and shack she'd found upon her arrival; it had taken weeks of hacking and sawing at twigs and trees to save up enough lumber to patch the MANY holes in the house and slap together rudimentary machines for building anything more complex than a simple fishing pole.  She distinctly remembers how for the first month or so, every night she'd stumbled to bed with aching limbs and blistered, raw hands, and had to fight not to cry over the pain and the unfamiliarity of it all.  In her weakest moments, she'd even considered leaving.  Barnarock was only one boat ride away, and there was still a life waiting for her there.  She owed nothing to the sleepy little town of Portia, really.

But the townspeople had helped. They were a colorful bunch, the lot of them.  Barnarock was so different; people there minded their business and it was a miracle to get more than a curt nod from someone when you passed them in the street.  There was no mayor who had a good heart even if his business sense was questionable.  There wasn't just one restaurant, where people would call out to you as you passed by, invite you to chat and sit, buy you lunch because you looked tired, and then walk back with you to your house just because they could.  No one popped by unannounced at your house with a home-cooked meal because they'd made too much and were wondering if maybe she'd like some?  There were no rivals that---well, no, that wasn't being fair, Higgins was a unique person all the way around she figured, but it didn't make him any less crucial to the town all his.....eccentricities aside.   And there certainly wasn't any Civil Corp in Barnarock.  The people there scoffed at the notion of danger, living protected in high walls and isolated from the rest of the world.  The notion of animals and monsters roaming just in fields a stones throw from the town would've rocked them to their very core. The thought crosses her mind that her old friends would be shocked and possibly repulsed if she told them that she spent a good chunk of her time now spelunking in nearby caverns and sewers for precious ore and materials to support the town and the people that have become her new home and family. She's paid richly for her services, though she keeps insisting it's entirely too much.  It's not much different to how every shares their food, their clothes, their yarn, their tools with her---she has crafting materials to spare and the machines to turn them into things, so why shouldn't she give back to those who helped her start? Arlo had laughed when she told him as much.  "Well," he'd said around a grin.  "I imagine what you build has a lot more impact than just a homemade pie, no matter how nice it may be."  To emphasize his point, he'd gestured at his hip, where the gleaming sword she'd forged for him the month prior was strapped. Arlo was another thing that Barnarock didn't have.  That was the difference she was most acutely aware of. She remembers the first time she'd met him.  It had been two weeks, maybe, into her residency at Portia.  The fields around her home were relatively safe but also barren of any lumber, long since stripped bear due to her efforts to fix the place up.  And the colorful llamas that grazed just beyond had seemed so tame from far away. Turns out, the rainbow colors were the only nice things about them. She'd been on the ground, out of breath and bleeding from a nasty scrape on her forehead, dealing with the fact that a rainbow llama may actually be her cause of death when there had been a terrible shout from behind her.  Startled, the llama had reared and she closed her eyes waiting for pain that never came.  When she finally dared to open them, the animal was on the ground motionless, and someone, a stranger, was standing over her, leaning down. To her shame, she'd passed out then. She woke up in a building that she was able to identify as the Civil Corp headquarters in town, a place she'd passed by a few times but never actually bothered to go near.  She'd met them all that day, cheerful Sam who'd been the one to explain to her just what had happened, Remington who'd offered her a cup of team and a friendly pat on the shoulder while he'd looked over her cut once more, and Arlo, who'd lingered by the door watching her with sharp eyes and the hint of a frown.  Without the threat of dying to distract her, she'd been able to properly take in how broad his shoulders were, how sturdy his stance was, how comforting his very presence was. He'd shown up on her doorstep a week after she'd slunk out of their headquarters, apologizing profusely for her foolishness and thanking them over and over for their kindness.  She'd had all of 30 seconds to stammer out a hello and one more thank you for good measure before a wooden training sword was tossed at her. When she'd expressed confusion, Arlo had shifted his weight just a bit, looking her up and down.  "Training," he offered as explanation, and she'd blinked.  He had heaved a sigh, shoving his hands into his pockets.  "If you're going to be hard headed enough to wander straight into a herd of monsters," he'd said (which was a little RUDE, even if it was true) "Then I'm at the very least going to make sure you know how to defend yourself.  You can't count on me to protect you every time." "Can't I?" She'd mouthed off before she could stop herself, and then clamped a hand over her mouth.  There was silence for a moment where she was gearing herself up to apologizing once again to him when he'd laughed---a deep belly laugh, loud and proud and actually pretty nice to hear. "Flattered as I am that you think I'm that talented, let's err on the side of caution."  He'd spun around to walk over to an empty spot on her land and it hadn't even occurred to her not to follow. So yeah, it's been a strange year.  Learning how to sword fight, how to build, how to be part of such a tight knit community hadn't exactly been on her agenda, but she's not upset at how it's turned out at all.  And now, the year is almost over. Celebrations in Portia are just one more difference between it and Barnarock.  The town goes all out on holidays, and New Year's Eve isn't an exception to this rule.  She's never seen the plaza look so full of life, so bright.  The amount of candles lit all over is so high she's pretty sure it could count as a fire hazard, and there are streamers and ribbons and balloons of every color no matter where she looks.  The tables from The Round Table have all been dragged outside and not a single towns-person is missing, all crammed around them, sitting and mingling together and watching the clock tower tick down as a new year approaches them. She's huddled against the wall of Town Hall, preferring to leave the seats to some of the older folks who need them or to some of the kids who are struggling to stay up, slumped over onto the table with their heads pillowed on their arms.  There's movement out of the corner of her eye and she tenses for just a moment before she sees a flash of bright red.  "Hey Arlo." "Well, fancy seeing you here."  He drawls.  She rolls her eyes--where else would she be on the night of a festival?  "Mind if I join you?" "Not at all."  He slides closer, pressing against the wall with her, letting their shoulders brush against each other.  "Kinda shocked to see you here," she tells him casually, ignoring the way her heart is beating against her ribcage.  "Figured you'd be out in the wilds playing hero or something equally as noble." He huffs a quiet laugh, bumping against her lightly.  "Not tonight," he says.  "Even heroes have to rest now and again." There's a lot of ways she could answer that.  She could tease him for his constant need to serve and protect---one of his more admirable qualities, even if it worried her and the rest of the Civil Corp to no end.  She could accept it for the simple statement of truth it is, grunt and let the comfortable silence that is so common between them take over. Or she could be more daring.  More forward.  More honest with the feelings that the two of them have been dancing around for an eternity now.  Say something like 'Well, who am I to turn away a hero in need?' as she leaned more heavily into him, let her hand brush against his, let her thumb stroke over the calluses on his palm that she knows are there from years of training and hard work. She doesn't have to choose any of those options though, because a sudden shout goes up from the plaza and both of them turn, startled.  Gale has both of his hands in the air, and a RIDICULOUS party hat on his head, pointing up at the clock tower.  "10 seconds left!" The people of Portia cheer loudly, and she doesn't even bother to fight the fond smile that finds its way onto her face.  They count as one, loud and happy even in the cold night.  "10!  9!" "Hey."  It's the urgency in Arlo's voice that has her turning towards him.  It's rare for him to sound so serious without any immediate danger present.  He's fiddling with the hilt of his sword, a nervous habit he doesn't seem to be aware he has. "Yeah?" "8! 7! 6!" Arlo takes a deep breath in and it would be FUNNY that he looks so nervous because it is so wildly out of character, but instead it just makes her anxious as well.  "I'm gonna do something that may be stupid."   "What?" "5! 4! 3!" He takes a step towards her and then another, and even if she wanted to back up, the brick wall of Town Center is behind her, stopping any possible retreat.  "It's tradition?"  It's half a question, half a justification she hears from him.  "So I'm really sorry in advance if you get mad at me, but I've also really wanted to do this for months now." "Do WHAT Arlo?"  She's blinking rapidly up at him, at how close he is, praying that he can't hear the drumbeat of her heart over the shouts of the crowd. "2! 1!" Instead of a verbal answer, he swoops down on her and she has maybe a millisecond to process the sound of party poppers from the crowd as the countdown ends, the smell of his earthy cologne that's right there, the feel of his hands on her shoulder, before his lips are on hers and he's kissing her, right there in the plaza like it's the most natural thing in the world. "HAPPY NEW YEARS!" Her arms flail at her side and a distant part of her mind is shocked that she's made it as long as she has fighting monsters and mining if she's taken out by something as simple as a kiss.  That tiny voice gets shoved far to the side as she realizes that Arlo is pulling away, most likely because she's doing a wonderful impression of a stone statue right now.  Panic overwhelms all her higher functions and she latches onto his shoulders, tugging him closer again and finally, FINALLY getting the sense to respond to the kiss properly. It's nothing special.  It's barely more than the brush of lips against each other, chaste and shy and shorty really.  She pulls away after a few seconds and the first thing she manages to process is that Arlo is blushing, which is funny because the red of his face clashes horribly with the orange of his hair.  She giggles, overwhelmed by the whole situation, and burrows her face into the crook of his neck shoulders shaking slightly. "Well that's not very nice."  He sounds just as shaky as she feels, which is nice.  "A man kisses you on New Year's Eve and you laugh at him?  Don't know how things work where you're from, but a kiss on New Year's Eve is pretty traditional."  One of his hands has wandered to the small of her back and is hovering just above it, like he's afraid to touch her fully.  "Didn't take you for the bullying sort." "You misunderstand."  She mumbles into his neck, lips brushing against the soft flesh there.  She leans back just enough to grin at him, all teeth and promise.   "I'm just a stickler for tradition." And she pulls him down for another kiss.

[kayr0ss]

The Masterplan (Diakko)

[LWA, Diakko, kind of an AU?, funny, absolutely disastrous, nothing goes according to plan, but their friends are so supportive!!!!! ...car chase??]

Summary: Akko is planning a confession. On the other side of the playing field - Hannah and Barbara are dead-set on their best-friend getting the girl of her dreams.So of course nothing goes to plan. Not even close. It's a complete, fast-paced, adorable disaster. [Modern AU]

--

Akko was on a mission.

She was riding shotgun in Lotte’s car, speeding through the highways of Glastonbury city with the urgency of a government spy. It was finally go-time.

She was finally confessing to Diana Cavendish.

They’ve gone over The Plan three-times over by now—Sucy, Lotte, and herself—and the warm glow of a perfect Friday afternoon felt like an omen for good-and-romantic things to come. The time was nigh—it was now or never.

Now, Akko was no fool. She knew that Lotte and Sucy were only in it so she’d shut up about The Masterplan once and for all, but she appreciated their help nonetheless. And maybe she’d take back what she just said because Lotte seemed genuinely invested in planting the seeds of love and romance.

“Flowers. Lights. Confession.” Akko muttered to herself for the hundredth time, earning an eyeroll from Lotte (who was in charge of lights) behind the wheel.

“It will be fine, Akko.”

“It’s me!” She groaned, throwing a hand up to gesture emphasis. “Anything that can possibly go wrong goes wrong with me!”

“I second this.”

“Thanks for the support, Sucy.” Akko groaned sarcastically. “I ate way too much, way too fast in my nervousness earlier and now I’m bloated and likely ruined my appetite for our dinner!”

“Dinner?” Lotte spared her a sidelong glance, zipping through the highway and causing her passengers to lurch in their seats. “That wasn’t part of The Masterplan. You completely overlooked any sort of food-prep.”

“Kuso!” Akko groaned. “I’ll just wing it! Let’s just get those flowers.”

“Take a left here,” Sucy tapped on Lotte’s shoulders. She was a botanist and therefore assigned to help with the flowers. She made plans to arrange a bouquet with her contact at the local shop, and had reluctantly sworn an oath to forego anything poisonous—with sucked—but it was for Akko, and it was just for one night.

Time was of the essence.

Lotte drummed her fingertips against the steering wheel in anticipation when they came to halt along a stoplight. The Masterplan’s execution was set for eight o’clock, and it was already four-thirty in the afternoon.

Three and half hours.

Set-up their small backyard patio with lights.

Get ready with the best flowers.

And let Akko handle the confession.

Simple. Effective.

Ultimately, disastrous.

 ---

“She said it’d be just the two of you?” Barbara leaned forward, watching with a mixture of excitement and apprehension as Diana paced around her office at the hospital.

“Yes.” The blonde woman had sunk into a trance-like state of thought. Thinking. Thinking at a hundred miles per hour. This was the opportunity she had been waiting for.

“I—I’m going to confess.”

“Finally!” Hannah practically slammed her fist down the table.

“It must be done perfectly.” Diana said with conviction. “I must get her flowers, and I should at least offer to cover our meal. Do you think she likes Japanese?”

“Likes? She is Japanese! Though she might be sick of it.” Barbara shrugged.

“Or—” Hannah perked up. “—missing it terribly after having stayed in London for so long.”

Curses. They were only at ‘food’ and it was already beginning to get complicated.

“Should I just ask her?”

“No way!” Barbara gasped. “You’re gonna blow Kagari away with a surprise without spoiling anything.”

“She is rather fond of surprises.” Diana stopped her pacing to run her hand through perfect, blonde hair.

“So what’s the plan, Dia?” Hannah urged, already sharing a grin with Barbara.

“Flowers. Food. Confession.”

Simple.

Hannah was already calling the flower store.

 ---

“What do you mean someone reserved them already?!”

Sucy glowered at the shopkeeper, and Lotte and Akko had to physically back away as though she had grown fangs.

“I’m sorry!” The clerk raised his hands defensively. “Like, just five minutes ago!”

“After everything we’ve been through, Hendrick?! I even called that I was coming by!”

“You always buy the weird stuff you know? And besides, I’ve got other roses aside from Ecuadorian ones, I think—”

“Not settling for anything other than the best.” Sucy was determined. “Names. I need names. Who bought them?”

“I can’t tell you—”

“You can and will.”

“Look, I—”

“You two!” Sucy had spun around, locking her eyes with Lotte. “Get back and get the garden ready. I’ll deal with this mystery buyer and follow in a minute.”

“’Deal with’?” Lotte gawked. “How are you even going to—”

Sucy Manbavaran would never be outdone when it came to plants. This was personal now.

“Go!”

 ---

“I’ll pick them up and meet you in a few!” Hannah grinned excitedly. “Barbs, you know what to do!”

“She does?” Diana blinked, allowing herself to get dragged by the wrist towards Barbara’s car in the hospital parking lot.

“You’re not going on a date wearing your scrubs.”

“I had no such plans to.”

“Casual won’t do either!” Barbara nagged, fishing for her keys. “You’ve gotta look drop-dead gorgeous.”

“I—I don’t think it’s necessary to.”

“Shush, hon. I just want you to relax and think Akko thoughts, or whatever.”

“Akko thoughts aren’t exactly… relaxing as of the moment.”

“Fair point.”

“Where to?”

Barbara took a quick glance towards her watch and pursed her lips in thought. “Shopping. Then food.”

“Shopping—?”

“Shut up and get in the car!”

 ---

“She’s crazy!” Akko shrieked. “She had that crazy look in her eyes, like she’s about to poison someone!”

“Well we’re going to have to trust her because it’s five-fifteen and the patio is far from ready!”

Lotte was back behind the wheel, zooming through traffic towards her trinket shop. It was a lot less time than she was comfortable with. Lacing the gazebo with firefly lights and battery-operated teacup candles likely took longer than her mental estimate.

“How are you feeling?” She glanced towards Akko. “You’re looking pale.”

“I—I’m fine.” The brunette said in a contorted voice. Lotte brushed it off as nervousness (which was a rare enough emotion for Akko).

“You sure?”

“Yup!” Akko nodded in determination, steeling her resolve. “Kami-sama, why can’t we just be dating already?”

“Just a few more hours until you are, Akko.”

“If she likes me back!”

“Which she will.”

“But have you seen her Lotte?” Akko began to ramble.

“Many times, yes.”

“How is she even real—what am I doing?! Oh no, oh no, oh no am I seriously going to confess—”

“Breathe!”

Lotte gave her best friend the surest smile she could muster.

“She will.”

 ---

It was now five forty-seven.

“You.”

Sucy narrowed her eyes, staring straight into hazel. She had camped out in the flower shop, figuring that whoever placed such an urgent order would show up any minute to pick them up. True enough, a familiar woman in a white-coat with auburn hair came bursting through, shouting for her order of Ecuadorian roses.

“Sucy.” Hannah sneered, crossing her arms. “What’s the meaning of this?”

“Those flowers you ordered are mine. I got here first.”

“No way!” Hannah challenged. “I put in the call. He said they were available.”

“How can that take precedence over a client already in-store and paying on the spot?” Sucy turned her calm but heavy glare towards Hendrick, who was sweating bullets while looking between the two women.

“I already paid!” Hannah pulled out her phone triumphantly, showing the screenshot of an online payment transfer. Sucy cursed herself for not having the foresight to have done so earlier.

“I—I don’t make the rules ma’am.” Hendrick conceded, carefully presenting the lovely bouquet of twenty-four roses to the woman who happened to be Sucy’s friend—if only through the sheer force of Akko’s gravitational-friendship-pull. The poor shopkeeper looked pale, trapped between the two very different yet equally threatening auras.

“I’m leaving. Buy something else!” Hannah had turned around dramatically, stepping out through the door with her hair bouncing through the motions.

“You never told me you had online orders.” Sucy told Hendrick evenly.

“I—It was launched recently.”

“Screw that,” she said with gritted teeth. On whim, she decided to follow Hannah, walking into the street and whistling as loudly as she can towards the nearest cab.

A middle-aged man with a bushy moustache looked up from behind the window. “Where to, missy?”

“No questions!” Sucy jumped into the front seat. “Follow that car—and don’t fucking call me missy!”

---

“You’re being—what?” Barbara shrieked as quietly as she could. Just as Diana entered the dressing room a minute ago, her phone began ringing with Hannah’s photo popping up. “Chased? By Sucy? For the flowers?”

[“Yes! She’s a madwoman! Probably going to blow something up with another potion or—"]

“Don’t call me while you’re driving!” Barbara hissed, looking back towards the dressing room which was slowly opening.

Diana stepped out, looking lovely in a sheer white top and cream slacks. She asked how she looked and Barbara had quickly tossed another top for her to try, desperately trying to keep up with Hannah’s rambling on the other line.

“You look great—love the pants—try this blue one! Come on, come on! In you go, nothing to stress about!”

“Stress about?” Diana blinked, frowning. “Is that Hans on the phone?”

“Yeah, it’s all going swell!” Barbara’s voice pitched a little too high. “In you go!”

“O—Okay.”

She had practically slammed the door into Diana’s face, and with a deep breath she diverted her attention back to Hannah.

“Don’t overspeed, and why are you two having a car chase?! It’s just flowers!”

 ---

“Just flowers?!” Hannah repeated, aghast. “Not when it’s for one of the most important days of our best friend’s life, they aren’t!”

She took a sharp turn at the nearest street, going nowhere in particular if only to shake Sucy off. It was an unfortunately wide road and she was opposite the rush hour lane, leaving it relatively traffic free. She had no intention of breaking speed limits and was forced to stay at seventy. Soon enough, the cab pulled up at her right.

Sucy rolled down the window, looking as worked up as Hannah had ever seen her in their time knowing each other. The driver seemed like he was having the time of his life. “I’ll pay for its price plus ten pounds on top!”

“You think I’m cheap?!” She shouted back, doing her best to keep her driving steady.

“Twenty!”

“You can’t buy me, Sucy! Not for this occasion—not ever!” She grit her teeth and banked towards the left, putting a truck in between them.

Barbara was still in the call.

[“By the nines, Hannah!”]

---

“Whoa!” Akko blinked, head whipping to the side while she followed a familiar-looking SUV speed down the road, seemingly chased by a cab. “Shit’s crazy today!”

“Come on, Akko!” Lotte led her out of the trinket shop’s front and back to her parked car. It took them around forty-five minutes just trying to find the perfect set of lights and the clock was ticking. Akko’s nerves were beginning to fray, and the woman was jumpy, reckless (more so than usual) and generally hyper—

“Akko, be careful!”

—active.

By the nine.

There was a loud thud—and the resonance of something very hard bumping into metal.

That was it.

The Masterplan would have to wait.

Akko ran into a lamppost and passed out with a bleeding nose.

 ---

“I haven’t heard from Akko.”

It was now seven in the evening and Diana was beginning to fret. She and her friends had returned to her flat to get her ready, but she thought the brunette would at least message her. Should she send another text? She did just half-an-hour ago, informing the brunette she was heading home to get ready. Is a call too forward?

Goodness. She shook her head—why would it be too forward? They were by no means strangers. Far from it! She blushed, this whole thing was getting to her and she hated it. Deciding she could very much call Atsuko Kagari whenever she pleased, she slipped out her phone and dialed.

“She has a heart emoji after her name?” Hannah snickered.

Diana ignored it, flushing red. Her phone rang. And rang. But Akko never picked up.

She exhaled in frustration, wondering if Akko had gotten herself mixed up in another form of disaster. It wasn’t a far-fetched assumption. Or did she ditch her? No, she wasn’t like that. Was she?

Her eyes fell towards the navy-blue top she had picked from the store, and then towards the most beautiful bundle of roses she had ever seen.

It looked perfect. Except—

“Did you really get into a car chase for this?”

“Yup!” Hannah raised a fist in victory. “And I won too. Sucy just up and backed off.”

“That’s suspicious.” Barbara narrowed her eyes. “But I still insist you are absolutely insane for pulling that!”

“What matters—” Hannah crossed her arms. “—is I got the job done.”

Diana sighed, growing anxious and excited at the same time. She glanced back towards her phone. “Let’s just hope I get to give them.”

 ---

“A lamppost.” Sucy stared at Lotte evenly. “Unbelievable. I got into a fucking car chase only for this moron to walk into a lamppost.”

“That’s what you’re worried about?”

“It’s Akko. She’ll be fine. Hasn’t she broken like, every bone in her body at this point?”

Well. She wasn’t wrong. They were in the Glastobury hospital and Lotte hoped Diana would be on-duty, but upon asking the nurse’s station she clocked out early for today.

“What did Diana say?” Lotte asked Sucy.

“Huh?”

“You didn’t text her?”

“I thought you did.”

“Sucy!”

“You’re the one with her number.”

“But I—”

“Are you her flat-mates?” A young-looking doctor peered through the door of Akko’s recovery room. She broke her nose—but there was no need for a rhinoplasty and therefore she didn’t need admission. Broken nose aside, Akko was in surprisingly good health, bearing an almost-Olympic endurance which in hindsight explained her ability to recover from seemingly anything.

“Yes!” Lotte nodded diligently.

“Well you can take her home now. This one is crazy—she’s already sitting up after an hour of recovery. But I do need to warn you she’s—uh—”

“She’s?” Sucy prodded, hiding her concern under the guise of impatience.

“High as a kite?”

---

Akko was having a good time.

A good time.

She laughed, her head feeling woozy, her hands moving as though they were floating in water and—it was just so funny! By the nines this was the shit!

Her nose kinda felt funny though. Weird.

“Akko?”

Huh? Is—it’s a friend! Akko grinned. Her best friend! “Oh Lotte.”

“That’s just trippy.” Another voice said.

One eye only? Oh it must be Sucy!

“Your hair—” Akko smiled whimsically. “It’s freaking whack, Sucy.”

“Why does she still sound like herself?” Sucy turned to Lotte.

“I told you to be careful!” Lotte wailed, moving to her side to help her up.

“This is place is so bright.” Akko narrowed her groggy eyes, her head lolling about while she inspected her surroundings. Then she gasped. “Where’s Diana! This is Diana’s work!”

“She isn’t here.” Lotte placated. “And sit down—you’ll hurt yourself again!”

In the snap of a finger, Akko was done laughing and suddenly began to pout.

“I miss Diana.”

“I’m sure she’ll be here any second—”

“She said she’d go hooooome first.” Akko pointed towards her phone, sitting on the bedside of the outpatient recovery room.

Lotte sighed. “Come on, you need to go home too.”

“Can you do me a favor?” Akko asked innocently before leaning in and whispering to the two as though to share a secret. Then she broke into another grin—a charming, lopsided grin that screamed ‘painkillers!’

Lotte looked towards Sucy. The latter just shrugged. “Why the hell not? Saves her the time to go here and she’d know what to do with Akko.”

---

It was now seven-forty-six.

Barbara sped down the highway to the hospital, feeling every bit sorry for Diana who was cradling her head in her palms in the passenger’s seat. Although it was a little funny, and apparently Hannah thought so too, based on the snickering in the back.

“That’s just like her, though!” Hannah finally grinned.

Hannah was right. And honestly, Diana knew she’d be fine. But of course this would happen—and only to Akko. The world wasn’t so kind as to allow the night she finally decided to confess to be easy, right?

Dr. Strenger had dutifully informed her that a patient he recognized as Diana’s friend was admitted for a nasal fracture. All she needed to hear was ‘brown hair’, ‘red eyes’, and ‘lamppost’ and it was enough. Thankfully, it seemed Akko’s recovery was marvelous (unsurprising) and that Lotte and Sucy had accompanied her.

They pulled up into the parking lot and Hannah groaned. “Back to our workplace, yikes. You better do good by that bouquet, Diana! I almost died for that!”

She huffed, stepping into the familiar entry way dressed way too nicely for the hospital and holding a gigantic bouquet of flowers.

The receptionist blinked. A few of the nurses had turned their heads at the sight of her. “Dr. Cavendish?”

“Spare me the comments.” She lamented. “What room us is—ah.” Why was she blushing? In front of her colleagues! “Atsuko Kagari.”

“Oh, miss Akko!”

Right. Between accidents and visiting Diana, the staff knew her by now.

“She came in a pretty bad shape, but she didn’t need to be admitted. Dr. Strenger sent her home.”

“She isn’t here?”

“Actually,” the receptionist tilted her head. “On their way out she was screaming rather loudly that she was going to straight to your place?”

Her—what?

---

“I don’t think this is Diana’s house.”

Sucy elbowed Lotte, the pair of them standing behind a still-delirious Akko who rang the doorbell to a three-story tall apartment. It looked every bit as posh as its red-brick façade suggested. It was imposing. Classical. Nestled in a street of similarly luxurious dwellings that had cars Lotte had only seen in magazines—parked in garages or even right at the streets.

“But this is where Akko directed us to.” Lotte shrugged.

The door finally opened, and they tried so very hard not to face-palm.

 ---

“Atsuko.”

Akko grinned, feeling woozy, and reaching forward to shake the hand reluctantly offered to her. As she’s told herself earlier in the day, she was no fool. She knew she was tripping—her guess was either anesthesia or painkillers—or wait, were those the same things? Or like… not? Huh. She should ask Diana alter and—oh-right-she-was-still-shaking-Aunt-Daryl’s-hand!

“Hello!”

“A—Are you quite alright?” The elder Cavendish tentatively asked, eyeing her nose.

“Oh yah.” Akko waived a hand, giggling. “Lamppost.”

“Of course.”

Akko swore that was a little smile! It was a lot of work, but they at very least didn’t hate each other anymore. Unlike at first. Charming—that was Akko’s middle name! Actually it wasn’t, but—

“It may as well be.” Daryl commented.

Holy shit, did she say that out loud?

“You did.”

“Anyway—” Akko squeaked “—I came to visit Dia?”

Daryl blinked, then looked over to the two friends Akko had brought with her.

“I think you should come inside.”

Akko nodded, the action of it made her still-groggy head spin and eventually she lost her balance, falling forward—

—and getting caught by the wrong Cavendish’s arms. So wrong. Wrong wrong wrong. Not this one!

“I’mma take you up on that offer.” Akko mumbled, apologizing profusely while she righted herself.

 ---

A soft 'ping' alerted Diana to a text message.

Daryl Cavendish (1)

“What on earth does she want at this hour?” Diana mumbled to herself, sulking once again in Barbara’s passenger seat. “As if I don’t have enough to worry with Akko—oh by the nines!”

The sheer volume of her voice was enough to make both Hannah and Barbara snap in attention.

8:26 Daryl Cavendish: Diana. Someone very interesting has come to visit, although I’m afraid she forgot your updated address.

“Christ.” Barbara groaned. “That’s at the opposite end of where we’re going. I love you but I’m getting real tired of driving you around.”

8:27 Daryl Cavendish: I look forward to hearing your side of this story. 8:27 Daryl Cavendish: 😉

Diana’s ears turned bright red. Hannah looked over her shoulder to read and outright laughed.

“Just drive, Barbs. Have mercy on Diana’s poor soul.”

---

“She said that?” Daryl’s eyebrows inched upwards every so lightly.

“She totally did! Diana’s a lot cheesier than people think.” Akko smiled smugly.

She had checked her nose via a mirror in the living room, and all she could do was laugh. Cause she didn’t feel like she had a nose. Or an… anything. It was so weird to move her hands around and like, not feel them moving.

Daryl paused for a moment to check at her phone. “Hm. Diana will be here shortly.”

“Yeesh.” Akko grinned, rubbing at the back of her head sheepishly. “I can’t believe I forgot she moved out last year.”

“You helped her move.” Daryl said pointedly.

“I know!” Akko shrugged. “I forgot that too. Head’s all woozy. Having a good a time though!”

“I… am glad to hear that?” The elder Cavendish turned towards Lotte and Sucy. “Are you two alright?”

The two women held up their hands, shaking their heads with jumbled responses of “Yep!” and “We’re fine!” and “Just go ahead and talk!” and “Take your time!”

---

“Well this takes me back.” Barbara peaked up at Daryl’s excessive apartment through the driver’s side window. “Alright”, she elbowed Diana. “Go get your woman!”

Diana looked absolutely spent. But also, a bit relieved. She’ll finally see her—the circumstances didn’t matter. Somehow all this craziness felt just like Akko and after hours of chasing her around she was… just excited to see her again.

She felt a swell of affection in her chest. The same feeling that pushed her to think about confessing in the first place.

“Will—Will you two come with me?”

Hannah clapped her shoulder. “You think after this entire afternoon we’d ditch on you now?”

Barbara grinned at her, encouragingly. “Come on, lover girl.”

“Please don’t ever call me that again.”

---

“Diana!”

Akko practically wept, running across Daryl’s living room (“Akko, no!”) and into the (proper) Cavendish’s arms.

“I missed you todaaay!” The brunette whined.

The reaction was a bit excessive, even for Akko, and at Diana’s confused reaction Sucy had helpfully supplied that she was—“Still high as kite. Painkillers, or whatever.”

Akko pulled back, lip trembling. “You’re so pretty.”

“Th—Thank you. Goodness, your nose!”

“Lamppost.”

“I heard,” Diana said softly, hand coming up to cup Akko’s cheek. She had been so worried. She inspected the wound with such tenderness that she could hear Barbara swooning in the back.

“Ahem.”

Right.

“Aunt Daryl. Thank you for taking care of her.”

“No worries.” Daryl replied with a lilt in her voice, smirking. “I’ve grown rather fond of this one.”

The miracles of Akko’s charm, Diana supposed.

The next thing she noticed was Sucy glowering towards Hannah—and the flowers. Her eyes widened, suddenly remembering their car-chase, and that the entire point of the evening was supposed to be—

“Easy now.” Diana said carefully, intent on alleviating whatever tension remained. “At least we know Akko’s alright.”

 ---

Oh she’s pretty.

What the hell! She’s already in her arms but she’s so so pretty and Akko could just breathe in the smell of her hair and oh Diana is right here!

Never-mind Daryl, and Sucy, and Lotte, and Barbara, and Hannah—Hannah?

Akko blinked, looking towards the auburn-haired woman. Then she grinned. Flowers! The sight of the bouquet triggered what felt like a distant memory through the hazy fog of her mind:

Flowers. Lights. Confession.

Diana.

She gasped.

Akko then suddenly grabbed the bundle straight out of Hannah’s hands—faster than anyone thought she could move.

“Hey!”

But she didn’t care, she pulled on Diana’s arm, urging her to look back towards her—and oh the lights were so pretty in this house—it felt perfect, it really did, the only word that echoed in Akko’s addled mind was:

Confess!

“Diana.”

She said softly, as if in a moment of clarity. She shoved the flowers towards the blonde.

“I love you!”

---

I love you.

Diana’s jaw had dropped.

She said I love you.

All she could see was the blinding grin that Akko was shooting her way and really—really Akko? Right now? In this situation?

But she couldn’t believe that she was smiling back. Because she realized she didn’t care. Akko had just told her she loves her.

This entire day was a disaster.

But she loves her.

She loves her!

Diana wants to say she loves her back. Goodness, when did her mouth stop working? She settled for pulling her closer—keeping her steady, Akko was still a little out of it—but she couldn’t help it. Diana pulled Akko in, cupping her cheek and—and—

Diana kissed her.

It wasn’t easy—she had to do so gently to avoid disturbing the gauze and plaster on top of Akko’s broken nose.

But Akko’s eyes had fluttered to a close so prettily, and she actually kissed her back. They pulled apart—Diana was suddenly aware of the people and their surroundings—and Akko looked up to her. Smiling. Surprised. And then—

Between the blood-loss, being heavily drugged, and Diana kissing her?

Akko’s eyes rolled back into her head and she fainted.

-

fin

-

A/N: Every time I write something I realized I like to focus on singular, detailed moments that are slow and soft. Then I read this hilarious twitter thread about a guy who interviewed George Clooney despite rupturing his gall bladder who got high as kite on his pain killers, and then I throught "That's some big fucking Akko energy", and likewise decided, "what if I just wrote whatever the hell I wanted and get tripping" and here we are

Hope you enjoy this - this is something a bit different for me and I just sat down for like four hours straight and spweded this out, am i ok, LOL

[midnigtartist]

Oops all mermauk

Another mermauk au ficlet. A direct continuation of this

He is not quite sure how something like this could even be possible, but Caleb had not been lying when he’d said he was happy to see Mollymauk. Perched on the edge of the tub he watches the mermaid clean out the sand stuck between his toes. And if he's staring, it's only because the whole situation is utterly baffling. It was already such a slim possibility that he would ever find someone like Mollymauk, Caleb has spent most of his professional career getting laughed out of conference halls because of his theories on mermaids. He’d simply grown deaf to the whispers that would follow in his wake. According to his peers, Mollymauk is an impossibility, and yet here he sits, waist deep in warm water in Caleb’s tub. And if all that weren’t enough to send his heart racing and his mind spinning, there is also the rather blatant fact that Mollymauk, by some stroke of magic, now has legs. Legs Caleb would have never imagined him able to possess. He can't possibly hope to explain how that’s possible, not without looking into it, and he hopes Molly will let him look into it further,  but he is grateful for the anomaly all the same. He had thought, well, feared really, that after he’d done all the research he could do, Mollymauk would stop coming back to see him. On a few occasions he had heard in passing that Molly has a group that he travels with. It's such a silly thing and yet,,, yet Caleb dreaded the idea of never getting to see him again. So when he’d seen him out there on the dock, standing on trembling legs, it was almost like seeing him for the first time all over again. Impossible and everything he’d hoped for. 

Wet fingers nudge his knee, pulling Caleb out of his thoughts. He jumps, looking down at Molly who’s looking up at him with a slight smile on his face.

“Aaah, are you done in there then?” he asks.

Mollymauk nods, planting his hands on the side of the tub so that he can stand. A jolt of panic flashes through Caleb as he sees his legs tremble beneath him, and he dives forward to grip Molly’s forearms. The water sloshes against the sides of the tub but Molly doesn't fall. 

“Bitte Mollymauk it is slippery. Here, let me help you out.”

Molly hums a thankful note and together they manage to get him out of the tub and back onto the cold flagstone floor.

He really is a sight, standing there dripping onto the tile. The long gills that run along his sides flutter every so often, and his tail whips back and forth excitedly, scattering drops of water across the floor. Caleb is quick to draw his gaze away, releasing Molly as soon as he’s sure he won't slip and fall, and turning to find a towel instead. It would be pointless to deny the fact that Mollymauk is very attractive, and that he finds it rather distracting, especially with him being nude as he is. He shoves a fluffy towel into Molly’s hands. 

“Here, you can dry yourself off with this.” he says, keeping his gaze steadfast above the other man's navel. Gods he's going to have to find him some pants soon, and maybe then his heart will stop beating so fast.

Molly looks at the towel, and then back up at him. Expression utterly blank. 

“Oh ja, uuuh you probably do not know what I’m talking about.”  He just realized he’s trying to explain the concept of dryness to a creature that sends the majority of its time completely underwater. Where to even begin with something like that. “You just aaaa just pat on your body until you are no longer dripping.” he says.

Mollymauk looks- confused, but he does as Caleb says, slowly and methodically patting the towel to his wet skin.

Good enough, Caleb thinks, moving around Molly to gather up his coat. When he turns back Mollymauk has left the towel in a heap on the floor. His hair is still wet but its going to have to do. Again he sets his coat on Mollymauk’s shoulders and again the mermaid beams up at him. He nuzzles down into the collar and hesitantly threads his arms through the sleeves. Gods he really is cute though. Caleb feels himself returning the grin a bit shyly.

Gingerly he places his hand to the small of Mollymauk’s back and steers him towards the door.

“Come Mollymauk, we will aaah we will get you somewhere comfortable, and something better to wear than just my old coat.”

Molly cocks his head to the side. A ‘why’ or a ‘where are we going’ perhaps. 

Caleb answers both. “You will be more comfortable in some proper clothes.” he explains, guiding Molly down the hall. “And warmer. I  aaah- I have some things that you can borrow, in my room.”

Caleb pushes open the door of the second room on the right. It is the second smallest room in the house and it is filled to the brim with all the books he could not find space for in his office. He leads Molly inside and directs him to sit on the bed. “My coat will do for now, but if you are - are you going to be - to be staying Mollymauk?” he asks.

He's not sure how this works. If it is only for this one day or if Molly’s transformation is permanent. Caleb is still not sure what he is going to tell Beaurgard and Jester.

Molly pauses for a moment, looking down at his legs, and then nods. Yes

It only really partially answers Caleb’s question. They are going to have to find a better way to communicate, if Molly truly is going to be staying. He might have a solution for that as well, but at the moment it's far more pressing that they get Molly dressed.

“Alright. Ja my coat is sufficient, but if you are going to be staying here, up on land, you are going to need more than just that”  he says, slipping said coat off Molly’s shoulders, and draping it over the bed.

He is a bit taller than Molly in the legs but certainly he should be able to find him something suitable to wear. Caleb strides over to his dresser. It only takes him a moment to find a decent pair of rough wore slacks, which he presents to Molly. 

“Here, put these on.”

Molly points towards the bundle in his arms, then at Caleb’s own pants. 

Caleb nods “ Ja ja they are pants just like mine, they may be a bit long though.”

He does try to give Molly some privacy as he dresses, but after a few moments of listening to him stumbling and flailing, he decides he should at least offer him an arm to steady the mermaid. With his hand gripped like a vice around Caleb’s bicep Molly is able to carefully step into the pant legs, fastening the trousers around his waist. They do a good job of covering the lower set of gills on his flank, and Caleb nods his approval.

“Ja, those will do. I’ll get you a shirt as well, aaa hold one moment please.” he leaves Molly to inspect the new pants, turning and twisting to get a decent look at them with his tail wiggling out from the bottom of one of the cuffs. Caleb crosses to his dresser once more and fishes out a simple blouse shirt from within. He hardly wears it, so he will not miss it much if Molly were to take it. The collar opens fair to wide for his taste, but he has a feel that will not bother Mollymauk much at all. 

“Here Molly-”  he turns back, only to find Molly in a state of undress once more. Perched nude on the edge of Caleb’s mattress with the trousers left abandoned on the floor. 

Caleb clears his throat, as if that will stave off the rush of heat to the tips of his ears. “Nien Mollymauk, you need to keep those on.”

Molly shakes his head, no.

“Why not?”

Molly gestures towards his sides, towards his gills that twitch and flutter ever so slightly. The lower set are flared out and look agitated. Molly brushes his legs down and shakes his head once more. “They’re uncomfortable.”

“Ah I see” coming around Caleb set his hand gently on Molly’s side.its a farmillar touch and he doesn’t think much of it as he carefully moves Molly to get a better look. The gills do look irritated, and of course they would be. To have that rough fabric brush against such sensitive organs. Yet another obstacle he’s going to need to find a work around for. “Well I suppose it is alright for you to just wear this then, at least until we can find a better solution.” he says, handing the shirt off to Mollymauk. “It aaaa well it's not like you are going to be anywhere other than the house, for now.”

Molly takes one look at the shirt before setting it to the side with another shake of his head. He leans over to snatch up the coat from the foot of the bed, and pulls it over his shoulders. Then he throws his arms out wide, beaming up at Caleb. 

Caleb chuckles “I take it that you are fond of my old coat then?”

Molly nods, tugging the coat tighter around him. Almost as if to say ‘I’d like to see you try and take it from me.” He reaches up to tap Caleb twice on the shoulder before burrowing down into the fur collar.

“I’m not quite sure what that’s supposed to mean, but if you are comfortable then I am happy.”

At least its something so that he does not startle the girls walking around with his junk on full display. Though it does cover very little. Not that Caleb has noticed.

“Ja, we will look for a better solution tomorrow, I think.” he says. Jester, or even Beau, would probably have some softer garments that would be less agitating. he will have to be sure to ask.

Molly hums in absent agreement, occupied, it seems, with the buttons on the cuffs of the sleeves. A fond smile creeps its way onto Caleb's face as he watches. He's always found Mollymauk’s curiosity to be endearing. He’s always so enthralled by things that Caleb would consider mundane, like the buckles on his boots or the pen we takes notes with. It’s good that he gets to see him again. Those few days where Molly had stopped showing up at the dock Caleb had been so certain he had moved on. He’s very glad that that’s not the case, he would have missed Molly’s unabashed desire to discover terribly. 

“Is there anything I can get for you, Mollymauk?” Caleb asks, picking up the discarded clothes to put them back in their respective drawers. “I can get you something if you are-- uuuhhh,,,”

There was another half to that sentence but it vanished like smoke from the tip of his tongue the moment he turned back around to find Molly splayed out over his duvet. On his back with Caleb’s coat spread around him and he his face turned into the sheets.

It has to be intentional, it must be. That every time he turns his back Mollymauk seeks out new ways to fluster him further. Either that, or the mermaid really has no concept of modesty. There’s no leering grin on Molly’s face, or bright red eyes that watch him knowingly. Instead he lets out a great yawn, and cuddles down deeper into the bedding. Caleb flushes red all down his neck, caught between how very long and lean Molly’s legs look, and the soft expression on his face. Gods he must be losing his mind.

“Are you tired Molly?” he asks, keeps his voice light and conversational.

A single nod from Molly. Caleb feels his heart melt just a little bit. It's only about three in the afternoon and yet Mollymauk seems exhausted. He should have noticed it sooner. That walk up to the house can be a struggle for him at times, he can't imagine having to do it on new legs. And that’s not considering whatever else it might have taken Molly to get here. It is only natural that he would be tired, especially now that the excitement is starting to wane. 

The house has another spare room that Caleb has yet to fill up with research notes. If Molly is going to be staying with them, he will need a place to sleep. 

Tentatively Caleb approaches the bed. “Mollymauk, I have a room for you if you wish to rest. You will have to get up though.”

He's not even going to entertain the idea that he's strong enough to lift Molly. Molly's response to this is to press his face tighter into the mattress. 

Caleb chuckles. “I realize you are exhausted Molly, but you cannot sleep here. This is my bed.”

A lavender hand sneaks out from the bundle of Caleb’s coat and pats the bed beside Molly. The tips of Caleb’s ears burn at the implication. 

“N-nien Mollymauk that ummmm-” he not quite sure what ‘that’ is but knows he can't just curl up next to Molllymauk like that. He just- he can't. He shouldn’t. So he won't. He gnaws nervously at his lower lip. “Nein Molly that’s not what I ment. we cannot share the bed.”

Molly lets out a huff that sounds almost disappointed, but he drops it, apparently too tired to press him further. He gives another great yawn, tail curling up like a cats, and settles back down against the mattress.

‘Well i guess this is his bed now’

[angelliev]

Lover Boy - JJ Maybank x OC - Part Thirteen - Falling

Word Count: 2.5K

Summary: Aria comes back home to deal with the backlash of her relationship with her lover, JJ becomes interested in finding someone, and Aria scares the Pogues. 

Warnings: Kissing, cursing, blood, fainting, hospitals and Sarah Cameron being a savage.

A/N: Not much for this one. Looking forward to the next part. (Not my GIF. Credits to the owner. I don’t own any of the characters or the show.)

Lover Boy Series Masterlist

Miami has its perks, but nothing beats being back home in the outer banks. We’ve been back for several days now, hanging out, going to school, the usual. I wish spring break could last forever. Coming back to school was not something anyone was looking forward to. Thankfully, it was the last period of the day. I can’t wait to get out of this uniform and school. Ever since people found out about my relationship with JJ, people have been talking about me. Sometimes someone will mutter ‘pogue slut’ when they’re passing by me in the halls. I can really give less than two shits about what other people think, but it’s still pretty annoying. I’m just thankful I have Kiara, Sarah and Charis with me.

“So, Aria is it true?” An annoying voice snapped me out of my thoughts. I huff before looking up at Courtney, my classmate and unfortunately Samantha’s sister. She also used to live in Chapel Hill, then she moved to figure eight, like me. We used to be friends back in middle school, until I broke things off with her, due to her bullying others. I refused to be associated with a bully.

“Is what true Courtney?” I asked uninterested. “Is it true that you’re going out with JJ Maybank?” The question wanted to make me scream out of frustration. “Yes, why do care?” “Well, I was just curious, is he like your boyfriend or just a booty call?” I rolled my eyes at the question. “I’ve heard from a lot of tourons that he’s great in bed. Is that true?” Fuck yea it is. She asked with a devilish smile printed on her face. That’s when Sarah stepped in.

“Gee Courtney, you’re always into everyone’s business. Just like your boyfriend is into all the freshman girls’ skirts because he just can’t seem to get it up when he’s with you.” Que the scene from ‘Friday’ when they say DAMN! Courtney stomps away while glaring at the two of us. “Fucking bitch.” Sarah mutters. “Calm down Boo. Her words mean nothing to me. She’s just trying to get under my skin. It’s not worth the fight.” I chuckle, trying to calm her down. “I don’t care. No one talks to my splinter bean like that.” She boops my nose. “You’re adorable. You still coming to the chateau later on today?” I asked. We can’t really hangout together, due to the feud between our families. Everyone has been talking about it on the island. The two most powerful and richest families on the island fighting, all because of Rafe Cameron. Of course, Sarah and I didn’t let this affect our friendship. We’re still two peas in a pod, like always.

“Yep. Kiara and I are planning on volunteering at the turtle exhibit before we head over there. You want to tag along?” She offered. “I’d love to, but I’m helping JJ study for his test.” Lately, I’ve been tutoring JJ and making sure he’s going to school. I want to make sure he graduates, plus I don’t want him getting in more trouble with his dad. So far, it’s paying off. His grades have gone up and he’ll be walking for graduation.

“Studying or fucking?” Sarah smirks mischievously. “Studying! Get your head out of the gutter!” The two of us laugh together as we walk outside, where JJ and his bike are parked. I peck his lips, despite receiving disgusted glares. “I’ll catch up with you two later. Have fun ‘studying’.” She winks, making us laugh. “How was your day?” He asked. I answered by kissing him sweetly. “Does that answer your question?” He licks his lips. “Don’t know. Might have to try again.” He says before planting another one on me. I can feel the burning gazes of my peers on us. “Jay, people are staring.” I giggle. “Let em. They need to know not to mess with my girl. C’mon.” He puts on my helmet before I hop on his back. The engine roars to life, only gaining more attention from my classmates. JJ notices and decides to flip them off before yelling, “Later losers!” I giggle as we drive off towards the cut.

The two of us sit and munch on our food as we continue to study at The Wreck. It’s pretty cute watching JJ do his homework. He always has his eyebrows knitted and his eyes are so concentrated. His blonde hair occasionally falls in front of his eyes. “You’re staring again baby.” He smirks. “I can’t help it. You’re just so handsome.” I play with the loose strand of his hair, making him blush. “Awe, am I making you blush?” I tease. “I don’t blush.” He denies with a playful serious face. “Yeah sure, let’s see your work.” I take the paper into my hands scanning the answers.

“Hey babe guess what.” He starts. “Oh, dear god. What is it?” I joked earning an eye roll from him. “So, you know that broken-down Chevy Camaro I have?” He asked. “Yeah, what about it?” I asked, while continuing to check his paper. “I’ve saved enough money to fix it up completely. John B and I even towed it to the chateau, since my dad wants nothing to do with it. Now, all I need to do is fix it up.” I look up, my eyes are filled with excitement. “Babe, that’s amazing! I’m so proud of you! You can finally have your own car!” He smiles cheek to cheek. “I know, but I don’t know if I want to spend the money on it.” This makes my smile falter a bit.

“What do you mean? You’ve been talking about fixing it up forever. It’s always been your dream car. You’ve been saving up to fix it since freshman year.” He just sighs. “I know, but I think I want to spend the money on something else.” He says. “Like what?” He stays silent for a moment. “I think I want to hire someone to find my mom.” He speaks softly. His words take me by surprise for a moment. “I thought about what you said about your dad hiring someone to find your sister. I thought maybe I could hire someone like that to find my mom. I know it’s stupid.” He fiddles with his pencil; I quickly take his hand in mine. “It’s not stupid to want to find out what happened to your mom. I think it’s a great idea to hire someone to find her. Hell, I’ll pay for the private investigator.” I suggest.

“No, I can’t ask you to do that.” He immediately protests. “You don’t have to. JJ, I want to do this. You deserve to know. Plus, I’d love to meet the woman who gifted me with such an amazing boyfriend.” This seems to make him crack a smile, but only for a second. “But what if she doesn’t want to see me?” His question broke my heart. “It’s worth a shot. The worst that can happen is that she doesn’t want to see you, which I doubt will happen. Based on everything you told me about her, she really loves you.” I try to reassure him. “If she really loves me, then why did she leave?” He mutters. I just sigh. “Some people make terrible mistakes. But that doesn’t mean they can’t learn from them. Maybe you can give her the chance to redeem herself.” He just sighs. “I still can’t ask you to pay for a P.I., they’re expensive, aren’t they?” He asked. “Yeah, but in the end it’ll be worth it. Please let me do this for you JJ. That way you can use the money to fix the car and see your mom. Trust me, it’ll all be worth it in the end. I love you, so let me do this for you.” I plead.

“Fine. At least let me pay for the meal this time though.” He gives in. “Deal! Pleasure doing business with you Mr. Maybank.” I say in a stern voice, earning a chuckle from him. “Come on silly goose. The Pogues are probably waiting for us. I don’t need them scolding us for being late.” He pays the bill in cash before walking me out and onto the bike.

We reach the chateau, where we see everyone hanging out on the porch. When we reach them, I notice that they’re looking through these photos. “What are you guys up to?” I asked curiously. “Just looking at some adorable pictures of us when we were kids. Look at the boys.” Kie lifts up a picture of younger Pope, JJ and John B at the beach. “Aw! You guys look so cute!” I exclaim holding the picture. “What can I say, I’ve always been quite the eye candy.” JJ smirks, earning a glare from me. “So, how did you guys meet?” I point between the boys. The three of them share a laugh. John B speaks up. “JJ and I met in the third grade. This kleptomaniac here stole one of my toy cars, so I chased him all over the cut until I finally caught him. This dumbass had climbed to the top of this tree and couldn’t get down, cause his foot was stuck. I offered to help him down, only if he’d give me back the car. He said yes and we’ve been best friends ever since. Pope here, we met him in the sixth grade. JJ would always cheat off of Pope, which always made the poor boy mad. Then one day at lunch, these eighth graders had ganged up on him. We noticed and started a food fight to help Pope. The three of us got detention. The rest I history.” John B and the boys smile at the fond memories.

“That’s cute.” I chuckle. Part of me wishes I got to know them when I was younger. I guess they’ve always been troublemakers. They’re pretty close knitted, making their bond unbreakable. “Alright guys. Are we fishing or what?” Asked JJ. As we make our way to the HMS Pogue, I start to feel slightly dizzy. “You good babe?” JJ asked concerned. “Yeah, my head just hurts a little. Probably dehydrated.” I shrug my shoulders, not thinking anything of it. “Here, have some water.” He hands me one out of the cooler. “You’re starting to sound like my mom.” I chuckle. “Hey, I like your mom. She’s pretty cool. Always makes lunch when for Pope and I when we deliver groceries. Tips me nicely too. Wish all kooks were like that.” JJ smiles to himself. “Damn, I need to start delivering groceries to your house.” Says John B. “You should man. She always has lunch packed for us on standby. She makes the best sandwiches. Usually she’ll have some strawberries, carrots and chips on the side. Sometimes, she’ll put a cookie in there too.” JJ rambles on about my mom. “She likes you to you know? She thinks you’re pretty handsome.” I mock my mom. “What can I say? Moms love me.” He smiles cheek to the cheek, making me roll my eyes.

So far, we were all having fun on the boat laughing, talking, etc. Everything was going perfectly normal until my headache started getting worse and worse. I continue to down my water, thinking I’m still dehydrated. Perhaps I’m just stressed from school? It doesn’t explain the sweating though. It was only a nice seventy degrees out, with a beautiful breeze, and I was just wearing a swimsuit. We stopped for a moment to take a dip in the water. It still didn’t help however. My head was still pounding and I was still sweating afterwards.

“Aria!” The sound of Pope’s voice snapped me out of my thoughts. “Huh?” I look over at the Pogues who looked at me with concerning faces. “I was asking if you were okay. You look a little pale.” He pointed out. Great. “Yeah I’m fine. Just dehydrated. I’ll grab another water.” I shake it off, thinking it was nothing. I was wrong though. I shouldn’t have thought it was nothing. The second I got up, I started to notice these peculiar spots in front of my eyes. I also couldn’t help but notice my shortness of breath as I made my way to the cooler. I had to stop walking for a moment just to catch my breath. “You alright babe?” JJ’s voice sounded faint. My vision began to go blurry as I stared at the water. “JJ, I don’t feel good. I think there’s something…” I didn’t get to finish my sentence before my vision goes completely dark and my body goes light.

Her body shuts down and falls to the ground. Her head thumps hard against the surface. The Pogues jump and gasp when they see their dear friend collapse. “Aria!” JJ shouts, rushing towards her unresponsive body. John B doesn’t think twice before racing the HMS Pogue back towards the chateau. “Aria! Baby! Hey! Wake up!” She doesn’t respond to his frantic yelling. That’s when he notices the blood on his hand coming from the gaping wound on her hand. “Oh shit! Fuck! Guys she’s bleeding!” JJ can feel the panic and fear finally setting in. His heart beating a thousand times faster.

Sarah comes running with a clean cloth and first aid kit in hand. Tears settle in her eyes and her hands shake as she applies it to the cut. “Okay. Okay. She gonna need stitches. We need to get her to the hospital. John B faster!” That’s what she said. Sorry. JB goes races through the marsh. “What the hell happened?” Kie asked. “I don’t know! She’s was fine all day until we got on the boat!” JJ exclaimed. The Pogues near the chateau. “John B! Help me get her to the van!” JJ demands. The two boys grab a hold of her body and carry her to the van. Kie jumps into the driver seat, with Pope in the front, and Sarah opens the side door. Once everyone is situated, Kie hits the gas, making her way to the hospital.

“Just hang on baby. We’ll be there soon I promise.” JJ’s voice and hands shook. The minutes felt agonizingly long as they raced to the hospital. A sigh of relief leaves the group of teenagers lips, when they finally reach their destination. The boys quickly grab a hold of Aria rushing her into the ER. Their desperate pleads can be heard throughout the ER, gaining everyone’s attention. A familiar face spots the two boys carrying the limp girl.

“Aria!” Elaine yelps and makes her way towards them, a gurney following behind. “What happened?!” She asked frantically as her daughter was placed on the journey and rushed through the halls. “We were hanging out, then all of the sudden she fainted and hit her head.” JJ explained, following them, until he was cut off by a few doctors. “You’ll have to wait out here son.” “No! That’s my girlfriend in there! I can’t leave her!” JJ ignores their orders, tears welling in his eyes. John B grabs a hold of his close friend. “JJ! She’s in good hands. She’s with her mom. She’ll be okay. I promise. Just breathe man.” JJ listens to his friend, finally catching his breath, yet he couldn’t help but worry over the love of his life as he stood there without her.

[sapphicoftheworld]

Okay so I wrote a short story. It’s got some elements of Southern Gothic lit, but I wouldn’t necessarily call it that because that’s just not my writing style. It’s about 2k words so I’ll put just a few sentences above the cut :) 

         The vase of sunflowers that sat on the kitchen table were the center of attention. No mind should be paid to the anemic meat on the counter. Yes, it's fresh, but very insignificant. Even the honeycomb and two halves of a pomegranate, which are to be paired with the meat, are all the more intriguing. They are fresh from the backyard and cultivated to perfection, specifically for this occasion.

And do not at all worry about the bleeding skull in the back. If one were to look closely, it is possible one would find the skull with gold dripping down from the top, much like a vanilla ice cream cone dipped in chocolate, that was in dire need of jaw surgery. Of course its original owner had no use for it anymore, so I suppose it could go without the surgical procedure, but there is something undignified about a skull with a broken jaw, especially if that jaw were splattered with blood. Naturally that blood would match that of the painfully boring meat on the counter; for it would be silly for one to think there would be two different types of blood in the kitchen at the same time. 

       But nevermind those insanely boring details; the real star of the show, as I've said before, are the sunflowers. They lay beautifully in a glass vase in the center of the table, looking absolutely stunning. Almost in full bloom, perhaps this evening or the morrow’s morn will they peak, with the most dazzling, deep golden yellow hue. Strong luscious petals balanced gently but firmly with a sturdy center of deep brown. The seeds these flowers produced made the most wonderful yet distinguishable treat. They grew in a small field just a stone’s throw from the back porch. It was about twenty feet by twenty feet and when the conditions were just right, could rear about 100 plants if all survived. Growing no less than six feet tall, they tower over everyone, creating the most magical place to escape to. A place where one is untouchable; immune and separated from all outside unpleasantries. The world could go up in flames and I’d be none the wiser in the sunflower field. In here the air feels crisper and the sun warmer. It’s as if all of one’s problems and all that is unjust in the world has floated away to some other reality. 

       Today was just like every other day--nothing out of the ordinary and utterly pedestrian. The weather was pleasant enough so one could sit outside with a glass of lemonade (or a Bellini if one is feeling particularly cheeky) and not worry about blisters on one's skin. Inside, the kitchen fan mildly spun about, revolution after revolution, which was sufficient enough to keep flies off the meat and skull. There’s something uncanny about the flies here; they seem rather attracted to blood. This is strikingly peculiar because there are rather quite a few around here. And that is clearly rather mad, for why would any noticeable trace of blood be here? 

       Ah but nevermind the matter; the glory days of complete comprehension and understanding are long past. Furthermore, Mrs. Ignara was at the door now. I knew it was her before she knocked; she had a way of fixing herself up as to be presentable before interacting with anyone. Why, I’m perplexed myself, because she is the most put together woman I know; everything about her seems to exude this attitude of “I am a woman who is functioning at a level that is admirable yet unachievable; you wish and strive to be where I am but you know you could not handle a day in my life”. I think I may be in love with her, but then again most everyone who sees her falls in love with her; yet I do feel as if we share some sort of unspoken bond. Hmm. No matter what is true and what is real, I appreciate and covet her companionship.

       As I walked over to the front door, there was a hint of unfamiliarity in the air. This would have struck me as odd, but one can never be prepared for everything life throws at oneself, and not knowing what lies ahead is exciting anyways. The thrill of being blind.

       Blindness itself is not exhilarating, rather quite melancholy instead. Unable to experience the little joys of life: the joy on someone’s face as they’re given something mind and body numbing; the life leaving their eyes and draining from their body. The absolute power of being in control. 

       At the front door stood Mrs. Ignara, looking perfectly exquisite and holding a nice bottle of white wine with lobsters on the label, and next to her someone I had never met before. A man of perhaps ordinary height and firm but subtle build. He wore light brown slacks and a rosy button down shirt that had tiny crustaceans on it, only visible to those who looked closely. His right arm leaned on the frame of the door, very nonchalant but with a note of desperation, and his other hand rested gently on his side.

       “Hey howdy hey there stranger,” Mrs. Ignara said. “Care for some company and wine?”

       I smiled at the proposal. “Won’t say no to a good time.”

       “This here handsome thing is Jude. You’ll like him. He’s,” she paused to glance over at him, “cool.”

       “Hello,” Jude said. “I’m delighted to be joining you today.”

       “Ah well the pleasure is all mine,” I say, leading them into the kitchen. “Have a seat while I grab some glasses.”

       Mrs. Ignara and Jude sat down across from one another on the far end of the table opposite the kitchen sink. Grabbing the nice glasses from the corner cabinet, I turn to face my guests. The view was remarkable. A long, slender dining table of the finest maple trees fitted with three hideous floral chairs on each side and one at each head. They were upholstered with a wretched canvas fabric, a smothering of blue flowers of various shades and variety that exudes nausea and insanity, supported by shiny silver metal frames. Two guests sat at the end, one of whom I knew absolutely nothing and the other I desperately longed to know. And of course, for who could ever forget, the sunflowers in the vase on the table at the center of attention. My pride and joy. If I saw the view in front of me every day, forever, I would remember this time. I brought forth the glasses and easily poured the wine.

       “I hope you don’t mind I made lunch. It’s impossible to know what everyone likes, but I’ve never failed with bass. They’re fresh from the lake in the back.” I left my company for a second and returned with two plates of fried fish. 

       “My, my, why aren’t you handy in the kitchen,” Mrs. Ignara said playfully. 

       “Oh, you charmer,” I said blushing. 

       “Won’t you join us?” Jude asked.

       I waited for a moment, contemplating my response. He seems the right type.

       “While I do apologize for not being the most courteous host, I am quite content from breakfast and have a most intensive dinner planned,” I gestured to the back counter where the dull, soulless meat lay. “I know it may not look like much, but I am talented with a knife and skillet.”

       Jude looked behind me at the meat and honeycomb and pomegranates. For a moment there I thought I saw the slightest inclination of terror in his eyes, but it must have been the light because it was gone before I could be certain. This, whatever it was, lingered in the back of my mind, not my central point of focus but not so deep I couldn’t recall it. His eyes flicked back to my own and smiled at me knowingly. 

       “You have been nothing but delightful,” he said. “I can only imagine what wonders you can create.”

       “That is awfully kind of you to say of me. Would the two of you care to join me in a stroll through the sunflower field? It really is rather quite magical and wondrous.”

       “Oh! I would love nothing else!” said Mrs. Ignara.

       “Fantastic. And you, Jude?”

       “Thank you very much for the kind invitation, but I must decline; I’m not very fond of enclosed spaces and much prefer to be indoors.”

       “You, my dear, will be missing out, but that is how life goes. Feel free to open any bottle of red wine up. Top shelf is the sweetest, middle the sharpest, and bottom the richest.”

      With that, Mrs. Ignara and I left the kitchen and headed out to the backyard. We walked together in identical stride, passing the beehives on the left and the pomegranate trees on the right. Just before entering the sunflower field, Mrs. Ignara and I stopped for a moment. She looked to me for reassurance and I gave her a gentle nod of encouragement. Taking my hand, she and I stepped into the sunflowers. Immediately, I felt more relaxed. My lungs breathed clearer air and my skin felt warmer sun. The weight of whatever had haunted and plagued me was released from my shoulders. Mrs. Ignara squeezed my hand and I remembered where I was. The look on her face was pure ecstasy. She radiated elation and was the embodiment of joy. I have never seen such beauty. We laughed and spun about without fear of perception. Falling gently to the ground, we laid next to one another with a pleasant sigh. She looked over at me with an expression of bliss I had not seen in many moons. There was something about her that made me feel safe.

      “What is it?” She asked, sensing something was wrong.

      “What is what?” 

      “In your face, there is delight but in your eyes, there’s a note of hesitation.”

      “You know me so well,” I said. “I love it in here. It’s a magical place with deep, strong, true feelings.”

      “But?”

      “But it doesn’t last forever. What is true is not always real.”

      “Hey,” she whispered softly, bringing me in close. “We don’t get to decide what is true, but we have the power to choose what is real.” She touched her forehead to mine and we closed our eyes for a moment, then two. 

      When I opened my eyes on the third moment, Mrs. Ignara stood above me offering her hand. I graciously took it and we walked out of the sunflower field together, hand in hand. My knees felt like they had buckled when I took my first step out of the sunflower field. Evening had been birthed during the few minutes Mrs. Ignara and I spent with the sunflowers; the light of the world had almost dwindled away completely. We moved in identical stride to where we had previously been before, only to find something peculiar. 

      On the floor in front of the table where we sat not too long ago, laid an unfamiliar body. It had on a dark navy, long sleeve shirt and black slacks, both of which looked damp. Upon its head was a thick mound of matted brown hair. A thick pool of red had begun to seep from underneath the body, slowly spreading across the floor. I bent down and dipped my finger in the red. It was a warm, dark color. Slowly I brought my finger to my mouth, it tasted sharp and metallic, but was distracted by the sound of footsteps in the kitchen. As I stood up, the red dripped from my knees where I knelt down and had coated my hand. What I saw had brought a smile to my face and joy to my heart: Jude stood at the head of the table that was made of the finest maple trees. He held a plate in his hands, identical to those which had been placed on the table for Mrs. Ignara and myself opposite one another. They all had three rare cuts of newly inspired meat paired with a honey and pomegranate glaze. Next to each plate was a glass of red wine. The hideous floral chairs had become all the more pleasant, the supple canvas fabric had turned the loveliest shade of violet, and the multitude of flowers radiated euphoria. 

      I looked at Mrs. Ignara, then at Jude and melted. She and I walked to our designated seats on either side of him and sat down. 

      “Everything went alright?” I asked.

      “Yes, very much so. Although, I do have to apologize for the mess; you see, as I was bringing a bottle of red from the middle shelf to the counter to pour a glass, it slipped right out of my hands and smashed to the floor.”

      “Well isn’t this special,” Mrs. Ignara said, placing her napkin in her lap.

      “Every meal deserves attention and devotion. Let’s have a toast,” said Jude lifting his wine glass. Mrs. Ignara and I followed suit. “To this meal, and all that contributed to it.”

      We all gently clinked our glasses with one another and drank. As I went to set my rich red down, something in the kitchen caught my eye. What the back counter lacked in banal meat, honeycomb, and pomegranate seeds, it made up for with two skulls--one with gold dripping down the sides and a broken, blood spattered jaw; the other with a deep crimson stain, originating from the left superior temporal line and spreading outward. It was quite the satisfying sight. 

      In front of me, however, was much more impressive. Two guests sat with me, one of whom I had loved at first sight and the other I was learning to love. And of course, for how could they go unmentioned, were the elegant sunflowers in a case at the center of the table and the center of attention. At the peak of bloom, they set the mood for the rest of the night.