#and I spent a large time trying to find new bird species

[crazy-fruit]

#絵かきがいいねの数だけ答える 質問⑫: Draw something from a high angle

7 months later I finally had an idea and went with my favourite pilot. ( @skitzofreak )

[imagineabrighterworld]

For Scientific Purposes

Finding yourself trapped by the League of Villains, you found that it wasn’t all too bad. You had been kidnapped due to your usefulness when it came to working with genetic material. At first, you didn’t understand why they needed you or any of the other scientists they had stolen away. In what part of their plan did they need someone who could work with DNA? At the time, you didn't think it was their thing. Based on what you had heard about the league through the underground, they collected people with offensive quirks and tried assimilating already villainous folks to join their ranks.

At first you believed it may have been your quirk that intrigued them. While it wasnt offensive, it was rather useful. To yourself that was. You had a self restorative quirk that allowed you to heal nearly immediately upon being injured. However, you didn’t have a very far reach as you could only speed up others healing by about a third of the normal rate.

But then you met it.

Or rather, you met them.

Being a rather.. Non-conventional scientist, the Nomu had interested you immediately upon being locked in a room with only a panel of glass to separate you from them. At the time- and with the scientists they had, there were only four Nomu. One, a tall bulky creature with a bird like beak and dark navy skin, was the most impressive of the bunch. It didn’t speak, and while you had asked just what kind of experiments and tests had been done on it, you received no response from the villains that had brought you. All they told you was that you had to find some way to make the creatures take orders.

Easier said than done.

For two weeks, you spent your days and nights trying to get through to the Nomu. Testing countless theories on how to get through to them. It wasn’t that they were missing chunks of their brain, and no damage was showing up on the MRI’s, but something else was blocking them from understanding words.

“I must be missing something.” You chew at the end of your pencil, your leg bouncing as you slowly lean back in your chair. You were in the observation room. A thick glass panel was the only thing in the way of the Nomu getting through to you. But after spending so much time poking and prodding at them, you no longer felt uneasy about them. They were more or less mindless. And as strange as it was, you were beginning to grow attached to them.

Maybe it was the lack of human contact, or maybe your brain was beginning to rot, but you were tempted to get closer to them.

You scold yourself quietly as a small coil of heat travels downward. Squeezing your legs together, you furrow your brows as you look to the thick glass panel.

All the Nomu were in their proper tanks, minus one. The navy blue Nomu, the one supposedly stronger than All Might (or so Shigaraki claims), was the only one allowed to wander outside of its tank. While the others still needed some time to develop, this one was ready to go.

It’s eyes wander from the ceiling above it to the floor, before its gaze lands on you.

You knew it.. was wrong.. but the more you stared back at it, the more you began to feel the warmth in your core grow. The Nomu’s base was human. It’s body was arranged just like a human’s.. you didn’t need to do much guessing on whether it’s nether regions were human either. Or perhaps it was no longer so human underneath?

Unable to shift your gaze away from it, you put down your pen and gradually grow still. It may have been a monstrosity, but it was rather a beautiful piece of work. Whatever the villains were planning, you wanted no part of. But if they could make something such as this, what else could their technology conjure? This was an entirely new species of being, and that thought excited you. The possibilities were endless! ...

No one was around at the moment.. Perhaps it wouldn't hurt to take a closer look at it. Surely you could write it off as wanting to do studies on its response to outside stimuli.

You proceed toward the glass, punching in the code to enter the cage. Again, no movement from the Nomu. No sign of complex thought. Perhaps they needed something in order to make them move? Like an impulse..

It was worth a shot, wasn't it?

“Hello.” You speak softly. It turns it's body to look at you. You take this as a good sign and continue.

“Can you sit for me?” You lower yourself onto your knees to demonstrate. “Down here. Can you join me?”

It's head lowers, but it does not move. Mustering up your courage, you reach out and take hold of it's massive hand to tug it downward. “Sit.” You repeat gently, coaxing it with soft words until it finally copies you. Albeit less gracefully, it plops onto the ground in front of you.

“Good! Very good.” Your expression lights up as it tilts its head, seemingly curious at your excitement. “You're such an amazing creature.. I didn't even know this was possible..” It left you with so many questions, but it created so many possibilities as well! Who knew what kind of doors this creature opened for the scientific world. The mixing of quirks to create something to rival even the worlds strongest hero.. even outside of fighting, to build up a body to last.

With the creature once again in front of you, you couldn't help but admire its structure, and it didn't seem to mind your attentiveness to it either.

“They really put a lot of effort into you didnt they.” The Nomu watches as you run your hand along it's arm, taking its hand into your own as you feel the rough texture of it's skin. It was tough, but it had enough give to help with shock absorption, something you had noted when you were given it's file. You massage the large digits in your hands, fascinated by the way the navy skin would take on a lighter hue the more pressure you put into your touches as the force was distributed.

A low rumble catches your attention. Your head snaps upward to look at the Nomu in front of you.

It was purring.. Or something equivalent of one.

You smile giddily at your discovery. “Do you like that?” You question before continuing to massage it, moving from it's fingers to its palm. Again you are met with the low rumbling. You continue to go higher and higher until you are on your knees with your hands cupping the beginnings of its beak.

“A wondrous piece of work.” You draw your fingers along its beak and slowly sit back down.

By then, you were prepared to get up and return to your seat, your curiosity sated. But then the Nomu moved.

It reached out, and just like you, it took hold of your hands. But rather than moving up after reaching your elbows, it moved its hands to your waist and proceeded down.

Your breath hitched in your throat as it moved its hands to your hips and to your thighs, attempting to massage your body as you had with it, but it's hold was much more possessive. Its fingers kneaded into your thighs and pulled you closer to it until you sat on its lap, it's purring was a loud rumble by the time it reached the backs of your knees.

You reach up and hold the sides of its face to use it as an anchor to keep from falling backwards, but it was unnecessary for as soon as it felt you falling away, it pressed a hand to your back and held you flush against its chest.

“Ah- n-not there.” Face flushed with red, you gently push it's hand away from the apex of your thighs to where your core was beginning to drip with want.

Were you really getting excited from just holding the creature in front of you?

Much to your delight, the Nomu kept its hands away from that particular area of your body. Perhaps it simply needed more socializing in order to pick up vocal cues? It would explain why none of the Nomu understood human speech. They just needed more attention.

“I think I know how to help you now.” You beam at the Nomu that was now nuzzling its face into your neck, at least, it was attempting to. With a gentle pull at its jaw, you move its head to face you and give it a small peck on the tip of it's beak.

“I guess we'll be seeing a lot more of each other.”

For scientific purposes only.

[xddaengx]

Little Baby Bear

⚬Pairings: Jungkook x Reader

⚬Genre:  Romance | Hybrid AU | Hurt/Comfort AU | Angst | 

⚬Warnings: Hybrid Abuse | PTSD? | 

⚬Word Count: 3.2k

⚬Summary: You never thought you would see your ex again... especially not at your front door with his hybrid.

⚬Author’s Note: This was requested...It took a bit longer to write than I thought but I hope you enjoy. (there is definitely to be a second part)

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The loud knocking on your front door - was what startled you out of your bed that morning. The pounding continuing until you swing open the bright blue door with a huff.

“What do you want?” You snap at the man in front of you - not particularly excited to see your ex-boyfriend at six-thirty in the morning on a Saturday.

“I’ve been trying to get a hold of you for weeks.” Your ex chides, looking you up and down with a smile before glancing behind you into your small house. “Ever since you moved out here - it’s become really hard to get in contact with you.” He adds, motioning to the wide country side that surrounds your small brick cottage.

“Seriously what do you want, Hoseok?” You cut him off from continuing on another tangent, the sight of the suitcases besides him finally catching your attention. You look down at the hard top plastic with a frown, before turning back to look at the lean man.

“I just need someone to look after him…Just for a little while.” Hoseok says quietly his body moving slightly to the side to show the overgrown man crouched on your front steps. The large boy sends you a quick grin, before turning back around to look at your front garden in awe.

“What do you mean?” You question quickly, hushing your voice a little more as you watch Jungkook chase the butterflies around the garden, obviously excited by the new environment. Hoseok just grimaces as the hybrid behind him squashes one of your flower patches.

“I just have some things I need to sort out - and he’s already comfortable around you.” Hoseok begins, the raising of your hand making his sentence fade off.

“We broke up two years ago, Hoseok…Frankly after you cheated on me, I was hoping to never see you again.” You hiss, the change in your tone catching Jungkook’s attention, he stands quickly moving to stand between you and his owner.

“Please, you’re the only person I know that already knows how to look after him - and I can’t apply for a foster because no one excepts his species.” Hoseok snaps back, his hands balling at his sides as he looks over at Jungkook, who seems to falter at his owners words, his smile fading - the hurt obvious in his eyes.  

Jungkook had always been self conscious about the hybrid he was mixed with…The bear part of him obvious by the size of his hands and feet - obviously too large to be a humans making the hybrid clumsy but lethal when he needed to be.

Jungkook is quick to hide his hands in his pockets once he notices you staring at them, his eyebrows furrowed as the soft round ear atop his head flatten.

You let out a long sigh before grabbing Jungkook’s forearm pulling him to move inside your house.

“Fine, he can stay…for now.” You mumble, Hoseok’s face lighting up as he moves the two suitcase inside your front door before rushing towards his car before you can change your mind. He waves quickly to Jungkook who stand behind you, his hands still shoved deep in his pockets, as he watches his owner drive away.

“Well, welcome…I guess.” You say turning to the hybrid, who’s eyes stay focused on his suitcases, the tears welling in his eyes, sending a strong pang in your heart.

“Kook, he’s going to be coming back - you’re just going to be visiting with me for a while…” You begin trying to console the sad hybrid before adding, “It’ll be like a sleepover.” You words seems to cheer the hybrid up the slightest bit as he finally lifts his gaze, finally pulling his hands out of his pockets to tip furiously at his eyes.

You decide quickly to show Jungkook around your humble abode, showing him where he can sleep while he’s staying with you - the boy getting excited at having his own room.

“At home, I always had to share with Taehyung.” Jungkook says as you smooth out the fresh blankets on his bed, the hybrid unpacking his clothes into the dresser.

“Who’s Taehyung?” You question, your attention only half on the hybrid as you fluff the pillows you had pulled out of the cupboard.

“He’s the mistresses hybrid…He’s a tiger.” Jungkook says quickly, not noticing the way you tense up at the words. “She never let me call her by her real name…She’s so much nicer to everyone else.” He adds quickly, the words boiling something inside of you.

You were well aware of the way Hoseok’s, new partner thought of hybrids. The way she would treat them, was never something you agreed with, even when she was your best-friend. You huff, throwing the pillow into the spot on the bed, sending the hybrid a quick smile when you spot the panic on his face.

“I’m just going to take a quick walk, did you want to come?” You question the boy who nods quickly, pulling a large jacket out of his suitcase, sliding it on before following you to the back door. “Just wait here, I just need to change.” You mumble, looking down at your baggy pyjama’s - a combination of five year old sweatpants and the same shirt you had been wearing for the past three days.

Jungkook, nods, standing directly in front of the back door, his hands clasped tightly together, as you rushed up the stairs pulling the first pair of leggings and the first clean-ish shirt you find out of the cupboard, slipping them both on with the decision to worry about showering later.

As much of a sweet person Jungkook was, you know he was the worst when it came to touching things he shouldn’t. His large hands, throwing any spacial awareness he had out the window. When you come back down the stairs, you’re surprised to find Jungkook standing in the exact position you had left him in - his hands clasped in front of him, looking out the window in excitement at the forest that sit behind your house.

“Ready to go?” He questions, the small flicking of the waistband on his pants, letting you know his small tail was wagging with fury. You nod, unlocking the back door, swinging it open, not being surprised when the hybrid bolts off in the direction of the forest - technically what he would consider his natural habitat.

You walk slowly around the pathways that had been carved in the dirt of the forest, watching as Jungkook rushes through the trees, occasionally trying to catch a bird.

Hoseok had gotten the bear hybrid from a local circus that was closing down. It had been one of his favourite places to go as a child, and seeing that they were “adopting” out their attractions had Hoseok feeling nostalgic and giddy. You remember the first time you met the bear hybrid - it was a few months before the end of your relationship with Hoseok, the hybrid trailing in happily behind his new owner as he looked around the large apartment.

“And this is my girlfriend…Isn’t she pretty?” Hoseok coos at Jungkook as he motions to where you stand by the lounge, still surprised at the new addition. The hybrid nods behind his owner, his ears flattening against his head as he gives you a shy wave - one you are quick to return. “You two are actually the same age.” Hoseok adds, as he pushes Jungkook to move closer to greet you.

Jungkook was quick to become a close companion to both you and Hoseok, most evenings you spent with the bear hybrid curled up between you on the couch. When things had gone to hell between you and his owner, Jungkook had been understandably devastated.

The day he had spotted you packing your bags, he had pleaded with you to stay, to not let the Mistress tear your family apart. You shook your head - eyes teary as you pulled the suitcase out of his hands.

“I can’t stay, Jungkook…I don’t belong here anymore.” You sighed, giving the boys ears one last scratch before you swung open the front door.

“Well, don’t come back then…I never want to see you again.” The hybrid had shouted - wiping away the tears that fell on his cheeks. His words hit you like a ton of bricks - Jungkook was never one to yell, especially at someone he loved so dearly, but he had been hurt…You had hurt him.

Though as you watch him race through the trees now - sending you a bright grin every time he trips over a tree root, you can help but think that maybe he had forgotten about the things he said to you that day.

It had been an hour of aimlessly wandering before you decided to wrangle Jungkook and try to guide him back to the cottage - bribing him with making his favourite vegetable soup for lunch. Jungkook had never been a timid hybrid when Hoseok had first gotten him - he was usually very open with affection and any thoughts or feelings he had, but as you take off your muddy shoes, leaving them at the back door making your way into the kitchen, something tells you to turn around.

So you do.

“What’re you doing?” You ask the hybrid as he waits outside your backdoor, his hands clenching and unclenching as he look towards you in the kitchen.

“I can’t come in, if I’m not invited in.” Jungkook says quietly, his hands remaining clenched as he continues to stand at the door, looking like there was a war going on inside his head.

“Oh…Well you don’t have to ask here. If you want to come inside, then come inside.” You say quickly, swinging open the door to the fridge, not watching as the hybrid slowly slips off his shoes, tip toeing his way into the kitchen, almost as if he was ready for you to retract your statement and tell him to go back outside.

You take all the vegetables you need out of your fridge as well as a carton of vegetable stock - beginning to slowly cut each vegetable into large chunks, making sure to cut extra potato - jungkook’s favourite - before throwing it all into a pot with the stock and two large cups of water.

“It’ll take an hour or two for the soup to settle.” You say quickly turning to where Jungkook hovers behind you - watching you throw the dishes in the sink, wiping your hands on your pants with a huff, deciding to come back to the dishes later.

“I need to have a shower - Feel free to make yourself at home…There’s plenty of movies in the cabinet under the T.V. if you want to watching something.” You say quietly, Jungkook nods moving towards the cabinet with a grin when he spot his favourite movie series along the collection.

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When you come down from your room - after a long shower and sitting on your bed for an hour going through your phone - your surprised to see Jungkook curled up tightly on the couch, your small knitted throw blanket sitting over his lap. You can’t help but let out a small chuckle at the sight of the large boy covered with such a small blanket.

As quietly as you can manage - you make your way over to the basket in the corner of your lounge room - pulling one of the larger fleece blankets out, slowly making your way over to the hybrid, draping the blanket over him gently. The hybrid shifts when the weight of the blanket surrounds him and you freeze not wanting him to wake up from his nap.

The hybrid lets out a content sigh - snuggling further under the blanket, a small grin spreading across his face. You let out a breath of relief as you try to slip away from the cuddled up hybrid.

“Thank you, Y/n.” You hear the deep voice rumble, the tone and volume much different from what you were used to with Jungkook. You make your way into the kitchen, trying not to think about the change in the hybrid voice.

Jungkook had always had a tendency to act almost childlike - something he had been taught to do in the circus…to appeal to the masses - his voice was usually much higher, as if he was constantly speaking in a soft whining tone. But the voice that had just left him was much different. It was deeper, stronger and much more like what you would expect from the large man.

Poking your head around the corner - you check Jungkook one more time before deciding that you would let the soup simmer for a little longer while he sleeps.

He must be exhausted.

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“Kook, don’t you think that’s enough carrots?” You question the bear hybrid who run in from the backyard his arms piled high with carrots. He shakes his head, a smile blooming on his face as he reaches the back door, proudly showing you his harvest of carrots from the garden.

“Don’t worry…I’ll eat all of them.” He chirps, moving over to the kitchen counter to place the carrots in the sink for a rinse in clean water.

“I don’t doubt that you will.” You huff, watching the hybrid move around the kitchen freely.

Jungkook had been settling in quickly. It had only been three weeks but he already knew the forest around your house like that back of his hand - a routine for the two of you being set quickly.

The morning was for walking and picking produce out of your garden.

The afternoon was for eating and preparing for dinner.

And night was time to relax - eat delicious food and watching gordon Ramsay swearing at people until the two of you made you way to your respective rooms. You hadn’t had much incident with jungkook about his past with your ex-boyfriend until the night after you had broken routine, opting to go grocery shopping instead of for a walk through the forest.

You had been cooking the stir fried vegetables when a loud crashing sound came from the lounge room - followed by a soft whimper. You drop the wooden spoon against the kitchen counter, rushing around the corner to see what had caused the ruckus, stopping in your tracks when you see Jungkook knelt on the floor holding the broken photo frame in his hands.

“I’m sorry…I’m sorry…I really didn’t mean to, I just wanted to look at the photo.” He’s quick to explain dropping the photo frame on the floor, straightening his arms above his head, in a straight line, his eyes turning to look at the floor. You can see the small shivers that rake over the hybrids body as you take in the rest of the damage.

You walk slowly over to the hybrid looking at the shattered glass around him, his hand littered with small cuts. You shake your head with a small sigh, the shaking in the hybrid growing stronger.

“What have they done to you, little baby bear?” You coo to the hybrid, slowly leaning down, bringing his arms with you. You clasp Jungkook’s hands in your own as you wait for him to raise his head. “It’s okay, Kookie…You’re not in trouble.” Your words drag a sob out of the hybrid as he pulls his hands out from your own, shuffling forwards before throwing his arms around your shoulders tightly, his face burying in the crook of your neck. His sobs get louder, his body flinching as you wrap your own around around his waist, stroking his back soothingly.

“I don’t want to go back…I want to stay with you.” He whispers.

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“I see you haven’t change your number yet.” You hiss as a tired Hoseok answers the phone, his voice groggy on the other side.

“It’s midnight Y/N, why are you calling me?” He groans, a voice next to him asking him who it was.

“What have you done to him, Hoseok? Why isn’t he allowed inside uninvited? Why can’t he behave like a person?” You look at the half closed door of Jungkook bedroom as you speak into the phone. You huff when Hoseok doesn’t answer.

“I knew you were a horrible person, but I never thought you were that bad.” You sigh, rubbing your forehead softly, as you take one more look at Jungkook’s door before walking into the kitchen. “Let’s be honest with each other, Hoseok…Were you ever planning on coming back for him?” You question, your frown deepening as Hoseok sighs.

“No…My fiancee…she’s allergic to his fur, she wanted me to get rid of him - he was burdensome to everyone here.” He says in a hushed voice through the phone, and you can’t help but curse the world for being so cruel to such a beautiful human.

“Just send me the adoption papers, with your signature. Don’t ever contact us again.” You finish, hanging up the phone without waiting for a response, letting out another string of curse words, before making your way to your own bedroom.

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It takes two days for you to finally break the news to Jungkook, not being sure whether he would be upset or excited to be able to stay with you forever.

It seemed to be the latter.

“Oh, Thank god.” He coos - his voice dropping an octave as he visibly relaxes -  as you finally tell him that you had decided to adopt him, that he could stay with you forever.

“I hated it there, after you left things changed…he wasn’t as loving as he was with you.” Jungkook begins, his hands clasped tightly in his lap, as he lets out a long sigh. “When the mistress moved in, he started drinking, and would often take out his frustration on us.”

“Us?” You question.

“Me and the other hybrid Taehyung. He’s the mistress hybrid, he had lived with her his whole life and didn’t know much different, but it was horrible compared to when you were there. We weren’t real people to her, she treated us like animals.” Jungkook continues, his knuckles turning white from how hard his hands are clasped together.

“Oh, Kookie.” You sigh, watching as he begins to shake his head.

“Don’t feel bad…I knew as soon as Hoseok told me to pack my bags that we were coming to you, I knew that things were going to be okay with you - though I can’t help but feel bad for Tae, he’s stuck there on his own now, and I have everything I could dream of.” Jungkook finishes, his smile widening on his face, as he unclasps his hands, reaching to take your own.

“I couldn’t be happier now that I’m here.” He adds, and you return his smile, the two of you flinching as a loud knocking sounds of the front door. Jungkook’s ears move of his head, taking deep sniffs of the air as his eyebrows furrow.

“Don’t worry, I’ve got it.” You say quickly, letting go of Jungkook’s hands, moving towards the door. You begin to pull open the door as Jungkook lets out a low growl.

“You have to be fucking kidding me.” You hiss, as you look at your ex-boyfriend standing at your front door a large envelope in hand, a black haired boy standing behind him, suitcase in hand.

[pro-exotics]

This isn’t “new” as the post above is from 2011, but I was curious if there were any actual lifespan studies on pet or zoo parrots, and found this first.

Here is the link to the actual study: https://zslpublications.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1111/j.1469-1795.2011.00477.x#t2

From what I have learned from lifespan studies on toothed whales, I know talking about lifespan can be very, very difficult.

(Apologies in advance that this post got so long-winded.)

----------

For example, when looking up beluga whale “average lifespan”, you can find figures anywhere from 13 to 80 years, both claiming to be “average”. But what does that mean?

Rather, 13 years is what they found the lifespan of belugas to be counted from birth, including all calves that die (which is a very high number). 80 years being the estimated maximum, and then some perhaps less educated person put that as “average lifespan” on a website about whales.

I think the reason for this comes largely because we judge from those two species closest to us; humans and dogs. Human lifespan? Eh, 80 years. In many countries today, a girl has a life expectancy at birth of perhaps 83 years. That is also very close to a “maximum” lifespan (say 90 years), with the exception of some outliers that live far longer. When you’re 83-90 years old, you’re quite ripe, as a human. So “maximum” and “average” is very close, in humans.

As for dogs, 11 years is about average. It’s also old, with some living a bit longer, say the maximum is about 15 (again, with the exception of some remarkable individuals). So, average and maximum, pretty close.

As for beluga whales, the maximum may be about 60-65 (I frankly don’t know where they got “80″ from, as the oldest small whales and dolphins tend to die off in their early 60s, I don’t know of any confirmed older than 65), but the average adult dies in its 30s, and life expectancy at birth is ~13-15.

So the maximum is about twice the typical lifespan for an adult which is about twice the life expectancy at birth. You see how this is complicated? I talk about whales here because it’s what I know best.

To compare with humans, in a more “wild” setting (our ancestors), the maximum we have today of ~115 is twice what our ancestors would start dying at (55 would be quite old and a lot of them would be dead, but they could still sometimes live to 90), and our life expectancy at birth was closer to 25-30, due to high infant mortality. Three completely different figures, in the same way as the belugas.

So allow me to wonder when I read this study on parrot lifespan in zoos. First... and this is the same as with whales in zoos... the older animals will have been caught or born in a time when we didn’t know how to care for them very well (and this study goes back to animals born in the early 1800s). They may have spent their first several decades, or even their entire lives, with a poor diet, habitat or care.

Any animal born in the 1990s or 2000s, that is dead today... obviously didn’t get to live a long time, for whatever reason. Animals born in 2000 or 2010 that will live to the age of 50 or beyond, will not yet die and be included in a study like this for a long time, so they are not included. Again, complicated. (And which is why, when I calculate lifespans, I use strict rules for time of birth and death, and don’t mix those groups, like animals born in 1950 with those born in 1990.)

I know these people are professionals and I am not, but each study is different, and different methods may be used. I am just writing all this to explain how lifespan studies are complicated and may not always give a true picture.

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To the point then, I am confused regarding the cockatoos:

It says the oldest Moluccan cockatoo lived to an age of 92 years, but that the average lifespan for birds who survived to adulthood was a mere 9.5 years.

The oldest greater sulphur-crested lived to nearly 73 years, and the oldest lesser sulphur/yellow-crested lived to just under 40 years. Okay. And for both species, the average for those who survived to adulthood, was 8-10 years.

This doesn’t make any sense. Putting these three species together, all with the same average in the end, the maximum was ~68.49 years. That puts the average (not at birth, but for those who survived their first four years) at a mere 14.2% of the maximum lifespan.

I assume zoo parrots would be spared from many of the dangers pet birds are exposed to (open windows, pet cats and dogs, open water, flying into windows, being caught in doors, etc.), so this really makes me wonder at the causes of death.

I could try to make an unprofessional little study by looking around forums where people report their parrots deaths at various ages. Again, it would be very unprofessional and could not be directly compared (no two studies can ever truly be compared side by side, unless the exact same methods were used), but it would be interesting to see, because I just find this so unlikely.

Looking at the macaws, it’s interesting as their maximum ages were not as high as those of the cockatoos, but their average was better, in their 20s or near the 20s. The highest average (of the birds who survived to adulthood) with a reasonable sample size was of the red-tailed amazon, at 21.93 years, from a sample of 15 birds. (And makes me wonder even more why so many cockatoos died young?)

It does say the oldest Meyer’s parrot lived to be 31 (and the average was 9), but I know for a fact that Meyer’s parrots have lived to be over 40 (outliers, however). I guess I can be happy that my Meyer’s is now 18. While data on her species is very poor, I expect her to maybe live to her 30s.

My white-bellied caique got sick and died a few months before his fourth birthday. Looking at his species here, it says this:

34 birds total. The oldest lived to 23.14 years. Total average lifespan was 4.97 years, with 8 birds dying before the age of 4. The remaining 26, who survived to the age of 4 and beyond, died at an average of 5.79 years. However, the additional 3 birds alive when they published the study in 2008, averaged 20.28 years. Huh. (Three is a tiny sample size and you can’t compare living ages with the lifespan of the dead, but it’s funny that they averaged so close to the maximum.)

Anyway. I will be looking at more studies and surveys that might exist of captive parrot lifespans, because this is interesting, and while I doubt 9-10 years is actually a normal lifespan for large cockatoos, I’m certain “50-100 years or more” only belongs to outliers.

[cupidcreates]

akdsfjkdksj I wasn’t expecting you to churn all this content out so quick (´∀｀)♡ omgosh you went above and beyond with the love language ask!! I love to see your interpretation of these characters so what do the cast consider the perfect date to be? low key vs high key? local vs out of town? -😌✨

Thank you! I’m glad you liked the love language post, sorry it took so long lol. As for their favorite dates I think I’ll do the same characters here:

Katsuki Bakugou

Rock Climbing/Hiking Dates

Canonically one of Katsuki’s favorite things to do is go rock climbing so he’d definitely want to bring a SO along every so often. If you’re an athletic person and enjoy being outdoors this will be a very fun date! If you’re not a very athletic person (as many of us aren’t) Katsuki will settle for just going for a short hike along a trail. Katsuki gets super talkative on hikes as well, as you’re walking he’ll just be talking about literally anything! From Hero work to his friends/family, to things that have been bothering him lately. Whatever is on his mind he’ll share with you while you’re both out, which is incredibly helpful as he doesn’t ever discuss his feelings at any other point in time. Plus it gives him a chance to show off how fit he is in front of you, which you both always consider a plus.

Izuku Midoriya

Movie Dates

A Classic, perhaps a little plain even, but Izuku absolutely loves to take you to the movies. He loves everything about the date, from discussing what you’re about to watch, to getting the snacks, to whispering in the back row (if you’re the type to get annoyed by talking during a movie he’ll keep this to a bare minimum). He loves being able to snuggle up next to you and hold your hand while discussing the finer points of the plot (If you’ll tolerate talking of course). Don’t think he’s being innocent here though, he definitely uses the darkness surrounding you as cover as he runs his hands up your thighs. Unbeknownst to most, Izuku is actually very much a horndog. He conceals it very well but he’s only barely capable of keeping his hands to himself when it comes to his SO. Any chance he gets to touch you he’ll take it, more than likely this is why his second favorite type of date is usually a stay-in date...

Shoto Todoroki

Dinner Dates

Another Classic, Shoto loves to treat his SO to expensive treats with his favorite being food-related dates at lavish restaurants. Not a week goes by that he doesn’t take you out on the town for the night at some place you’re sure you couldn’t even afford a glass of water at. It’s almost never the same place twice either, Shoto is actually a foodie and enjoys trying new types of cuisine whenever he can. He’s got a whole list of places he wants to take you, and if they require reservations he’s already got them locked down. If you love eating Shoto is your man, he’ll make sure you’re set with a wide variety of foods to choose from and always remembers any place you happen to be partial to.

Denki Kaminari

Amusement/Water Park Dates

Denki is a fun-loving guy through and through, he knows how to have a good time and wherever you happen to go he makes sure you do too. That being said, his absolute favorite place to take you is to an amusement or water park. It’s not often you two get to go, as you’re both very busy with your respective hero work most days, but when you do it’s a day-long affair. You’re there from the minute the park opens to the second it shuts down, riding as many rides as you can manage, eating greasy garbage food, and making sure to strike the dumbest poses for any rides that take pictures. You’ve got a whole scrapbook of these photos by now, their ridiculousness increasing with each new one added.

Eijirou Kirishima

Beach Dates

You wouldn’t expect Eijirou Kirishima to be a Thalassophile (Def. Person who loves the ocean) but he is. He adores being on the beach and it’s his preferred location for a date. You’ve spent many a sunny afternoon seaside with Eijirou, building sandcastles, chasing crabs, and just enjoying the ocean. One memorable afternoon you found yourselves right next to a sea turtles nest and you got to watch the babies pop out of the sand and scurry towards the ocean, assisted by Eijirou as he chased off the seagulls looking to make them a meal. Eijirou also enjoys surfing, and if you know how to do so he’ll get you matching boards so you can ride the waves together. If you’re not partial to surfing he’ll be sure to pull out all his tricks while you watch him, he’ll even let you onto his board with him so you two can just float together by the shore. Of course you two can’t go to the beach year round, but when you can you’re both sure to make the most of these sunny days, even if he does get an awful sunburn by the end of it. 

Hitoshi Shinsou

Gaming Dates

Hitoshi isn’t what one would call ‘social’ when given the choice between going out for a night and staying home he’ll almost always choose the latter. So it’s expected that his favorite type of date is one where you two can stay inside and enjoy each others company. You both work so hard as Heros, why not spend your days off relaxing with one another? He can spend hours alone with you, preferably kicking your ass at Mario Party or some other multiplayer game. He doesn’t need anything except you, his consoles, and a pile of your favorite snacks to have a good time. That being said, if you want him to go out for a date the best way to convince him is to take him to some kind of arcade, especially if it’s a VR arcade. He feels a kind of nostalgic joy for these places and won’t hesitate to return and feel like a kid again. Plus it’s always nice to repeatedly prove to you that yes he is the champion of Dance Dance Revolution and you will never usurp this title from him.

Tamaki Amajiki

Park/Picnic Dates

As I’ve mentioned in a previous post, Tamaki loves spending time outdoors; surrounded by and in awe of nature and it’s complex inner workings. He enjoys just taking time to appreciate the world around him, so dates where you can both relax outside and enjoy each other’s company are his favorite kind. He has a specific hill at his favorite park he likes to take you, bringing a lunch of all your favorite foods he sets you both up under the biggest shade tree for an afternoon. You both lay back on your worn picnic blanket and just cloudgaze, talking for hours about anything and everything. Much like Bakugou, Tamaki gets very talkative on these dates, discussing his week with you and anything new he might have learned over the course of it. He’s so very endearing on these dates its easy to fall silent and just listen to him for hours.

Mirio Togata

Crafting Dates

Mirio likes to have memorabilia from your dates, so you can expect a lot of dates to center around making things. More than just your average painting classes Mirio has also taken you to sculpting, woodworking, and glass blowing classes to name a few. At the end of your dates you both exchange what you’ve made and Mirio absolutely adores anything you craft, regardless of its quality in your eyes. He puts his heart and soul into making you something and more often than not it turns out spectacularly. Mirio wasn’t as good with the ceramics class, but you love the warped vase he made (even if it was technically supposed to be a cup at the start, we’ve all been there). Mirio’s kept everything you made him and even has a shelf in his house just dedicated to what you’ve made, it makes him so happy to come home after a hard day of work and see physical memories of his time with you.

Keigo Takami

Aquarium/Zoo Dates

Underneath Keigo’s charming and charismatically upbeat personality lies a bitter and broken man, drained by his role in Hero Society and left an empty shell of his former self. Underneath that personality lies a kid who never got to have a proper childhood and desperately wants to make up for it. He now uses his dates with you to do just that; not that you mind of course, dates with Keigo are always fun and lighthearted and you love to see him truly enjoy himself for once. Keigo’s favorite places to go are definitely large and intricately designed Zoos and Aquariums. He loves to look at the painstakingly accurate and detailed natural habitats, make fun of the stranger animal names you find, and learn new information about foreign bird species. Loves to mimic their calls too, much to the irritation of the birds and the zoo employees. He makes it a point to always get you a stuffed animal at the end of the date, ensuring that you now have a massive collection of them sitting all around your room. You’re always kept up to date on any Zoo or Aquarium events thanks to Keigo, as he has a calendar dedicated to all the unique events they have going on throughout the year.

Touya Todoroki

Crash Dates

Dabi is...well he’s unpredictable at the best of times and it’s very rare that you two have time for anything even resembling a date (being an S class villain does make it hard to exist normally in society and do normal couple things but it ees what it ees). However, when he can take you one a date --well the term “date” is generous here- it’s never a dull one. You’re not sure how he does it but when you go out you always manage to end up somewhere Dabi could never get into naturally. From sold-out concerts, to stand up shows, to parties at lavish houses belonging to people you’ve never even heard of let alone met before; dates with Dabi are always somewhere you two definitely shouldn’t be. One memorable morning he took you to a country club where you got to each fancy exclusive rich people food and play a horrible facsimile of golf before you were eventually found and chased out. It’s always fun to see how long you two can crash an even before being found out.

Tomura Shigaraki

Cemetery/Haunted Places Dates

Tomura Shigaraki is a man who enjoys his space from other people, in his opinion the only good person is a dead one (unless he’s talking about you, of course). So it’s not abnormal for your dates to be in a place far away from others. Again the term “date” is being very generous, more often than not he’ll approach you, tell you to follow him, and you’ll wind up in some abandoned building or graveyard. Normally this would be cause for concern, as this is exactly what happens in horror movies before someone gets killed, but Tomura has a soft spot for you so your safety is ensured. Tomura loves to see a place reclaimed by nature, vines growing over a run down house or worn out gravestones breaking apart into chunks of marble with barely legible words on them. He doesn’t talk much on your dates, but will often give you a random bit of insight about him; like on one date where you both walked alongside abandoned train tracks at dusk and he told you about the dog he had as a child. He seeks no pity from you, and these dates are not the conventionally romantic type, but you enjoy being able to be with Tomura in a way no one else ever has or ever will.

[some-dr-writings]

Gundham’s and Kazuichi’s mangaka S/O wants to draw them

Gundham Tanaka:

·       Though you were the Super High School Level Mangaka you specialized in historical fantasy! You absolutely adored doing research and finding new mythical beasts and species to sketch and incorporate into your work. It was no surprise that Gundham became your muse the moment you two met!

·       Gundham would allow you to visit his creatures and draw them to use as bases for cryptids and monsters of all sorts in your manga. The four Dark Devas often acted as your pose models given how unusually animated they were for hamsters.

·       Having asked the Overlord of Ice to allow you near his animals so often you spent much time together and eventually started dating.

·       “My Queen, the Stringer of Fates, what curse dares to plague your soul?! You’ve not touched the pages with which you create and destroy worlds, as if it were deadly to do so! You’ve yet to search out a demon to immortalize. Not even have you greeted the four Dark Devas of Destruction as you always have.” You huffed lazily watching the rabbit Gundham was currently grooming. “Artists’ block. I can’t seem to draw or write anything. Either I just stare at a blank page for hours, or I start something which quickly dissolves into an incoherent mess!” Rubbing your temples, you grumbled at the clogged feeling fogging your mind. “I did pull a few all-nighters last week. Maybe I’m just drained. But if things keep going like this, I’ll miss my deadline! I already asked for an extension on it last week, I can’t keep doing this!”

·       Gundham watched as you picked up the sketch pad and pencil. There was this stiffness in your movements. Your hand which once flowed about gracefully like a bird in flight now paved plain straight lines. Your eyes darted about unable to focus on anything. “UGH! I can’t even draw a proper circle for the rabbit’s body!” Sinking into your seat you tossed your sketch pad and pencil aside. “Perhaps a day of respite is in order.” “No, I already took a day off yesterday. I feel I’m even worse now than I was two day ago.”

·       The Devas quickly scurried over to you, hopping into your lap, or climbing onto your shoulder to nuzzle your cheek. “… thanks.” Gently petting the two in your lap you sighed in defeat.

·       It was at that Gundham abruptly stood up. “Where is my Queen, and what have you done with her, villain?!” “… Huh?” “MY Queen would never rot away so quickly into a decrepit state such as this! She’d fight and claw till her final breath! She’d never faulter so easily!” “I Am, your Queen.” “Hmph! No, you are not. Now, tell me where she is.” You marched right up to Gundham glaring at him. “I’m right here! I am your Queen, the Stringer of Fates!”

·       It started as a chuckle which boomed into uproarious laughter! “There you are. That determination, your will to live has returned to your eyes. I am glad to have you back.” Surprisingly, you did feel like you had more energy than before. “So, shall we be off? A piece of you is still missing and we must search it out less you start to fade away once more.” “… Yeah, a date sounds nice right now.”

·       As a bright blush dusted his cheeks, the Overlord of Ice took your hand into his bandaged one, the other taking your bag of sketch supplies, he led you out of the school grounds into the great beyond!

·       The day was filled with fun and laughter as you raced from place to place, doing anything you could think of. A walk in the park, a trip to the arcade, lunch at a café, shopping at a bookstore, and anything else you could have dreamed of.

·       As the sun began to set, Gundham and you found yourselves at the clear beach, dancing around barefoot, not a care in the world. “… Gundham. Thank you, today was amazing.” His entire face instantaneously flushed hearing his true name being called. In that moment he just looked so beautiful to you. His sheepish smile, those tender eyes, just, everything about him.

·       “May I draw you?” “… Of course, my Queen.”

·       And thus you drew, having completely forgotten that morning or the past few days, you were struggling.

·       “Ah! Your depiction captured my true form! I should have known you could see through my mortal guise!” He so happily admired your drawing with sparkling eyes.

·       While he was distracted you worked on another piece, one of a dark king holding his queen close on the soft shores of the beach.

  Kazuichi Soda:

·       You never held much interest in machinery till you came to Hope’s Peak and met Kazuichi. It seemed just about every time you saw him, he was tinkering with something, from a small robot toy to a monster truck engine. Often times the parts of whatever he was working on were spread out, and then seeing how they all fit together fascinated you. Without realizing it you’d end up just watching him work for hours and sketching out the pieces and tools he was using.

·       Quickly this fascination bled into your own work, incorporating steampunk-esque elements into it. And the more elements you added, the more references you needed. At first you tried getting some on your own, but you’d just end up injuring your hands and fingers in some way or you’d break the pieces.

·       “Look, you got me into this mess and now you have to take responsibility.” “W-what!?” Before Kazuichi could panic you placed an old, rusted pocket watch before him. “How do I disassemble this!?” For a week or two after you’d bring some new item to Kazuichi to disassemble and reassemble. You eagerly sketched out the pieces you needed the references of and more.

·       Quickly you and Kazuichi became friends. You would chatter away as you did your own things. Before you knew it the two of you ended up spending time together just to be together, no drawing and no tinkering.

·       Kazuichi would go to you for advice for his unrequited crush on Princess Sonia to which you’d try your best to help, even if it did hurt a little given your crush on the mechanic. She wasn’t the only thing he spoke of though, so you had plenty of other conversations.

·       Kazuichi certainly liked chatting so when one day he was quiet you got a bit worried… Then you remembered something. “Oh Soda. You’ve never been on a school trip before, right?” “Hmm, uh, yeah. I skipped out on the only one I got a chance to go on.” “Because of financial issues, right.” “Yeah.” “Well, I happen to be going on a trip all over Europe for background references and I was thinking who better to take along than my best friend and best mechanic I know!” The news certainly perked him right up, and he excitedly chattered on about traveling! Quickly the news spread, and it ended up becoming a class trip! Honestly, though a trip alone with Soda sounded lovely, you more enjoyed seeing how ecstatic he was to be going on an actual class trip with everyone.

·       The trip was fantastic, it seemed to be nonstop fun. Often you’d forget that you were being payed to go on this trip for work and that you needed to get reference materials, thankfully Mikan took more than enough reference photos for you.

·       Though during the trip, you noticed how Kazuichi, though still friendly, was a bit more reserved than usual. When you asked him what was wrong, he said he appreciated the concern, but it was something he had to work out on his own.

·       Eventually your trip took you all to France the city of love. The place was certainly an artist’s dream, you found yourself drawing nonstop there. It was amazing!

·       At one point in your trip your class wanted to get to a restaurant at the top of a rather large hill, but the only way to get there was via a thin road by car. So, you, Kazuichi, Sonia and your driver were the last to get to the restaurant.

·       Then the car broke down. Kazuichi immediately went to check the engine while Sonia stood at the edge of the road, looking out at the sunset. It was a gorgeous sight, her profile, the sunset, the city lights, everything. You had started sketching out the scenery when a though struck you.

·       You elbowed Kazuich, gaining his attention. You then leaned in real close while still looking at Sonia, not noticing the blush spreading on his cheeks as he kept looking to you. “Hey Soda, now’s your chance. This view is absolutely romantic, and you’re in the city of love. Don’t you think this is the perfect time to ask out the girl you like?” This hurt, it really did, but seeing how happy he was to be going on a school trip without worry like he always wanted, you could hardly imagine his joy if Sonia got together with him at a time like this. It hurt, but you just wanted to see him happy.

·       “… Ask out the girl I like, huh…… Okay.”

·       Turning to you he placed his hands atop your shoulders. “Y/N I have a crush on you. Please go out on a date with me.” “… Wait? I thought… what about Nevermind?” “I, well, yeah, I do like her, but… I really like you… I… That’s what I’ve been trying to figure out lately and... so I... You get it, don’t you!?” “… Soda, please let me draw you!” “Huh?” “Well, if we start going out, we’ll be boyfriend and girlfriend, right? I’d like to have something to commemorate the moment by.” “S/O!” He pulled you into a tight hug, giddy out of his mind.

·       You ended up drawing him at the restaurant. He loved the drawing so much he took a picture to use as his phone’s lock screen. From then on you often drew him for references for poses and though all great, his favorite would forever be the first one you made of him. It was made to celebrate you getting together, it was always so special to him.

[walker-journal]

Legend of the Vermilion Bird (Adam +Leah)

Characters: Leah Ramirez (Phoenix- Julie), Adam Walker (Hunter-Tapir)

Location: Just outside the Vural Property

Timing: Shortly before the events of And From the Ashes

Summary: After killing a Torple, Adam consults a wary Leah about the nature of phoenixes 

Content Warning: Woerm gore

The forest road was alive with the subtle rustling and animal calls of spring as Adam skinned a large Torple that’d shuffled onto the Vural’s property, instinctually drawn by the taste of spellcraft that practically saturated the area. The Hunter supposed such predators were a hazard of having so much mojo concentrated in one place. Being a muggle himself, Adam wasn’t in much danger from these lumbering magic-eating worms, but the Hunter felt it behooved him to quietly take care of threats to his significant other’s family. 

The Torple looked like the big-mouthed lovechild of a naked mole-rat and an earthworm with massive human teeth. Even seated on a hefty moss-covered rock, Adam was barely taller than the corpulent segmented creature. It’s webbed limbs were spindly in comparison to its body while its enormous yet unsettlingly humanoid mouth made it a wonder the Torple could move at all. It jaws were immovable once latched on, but it was the thick glistening layer of magic negating mucus covering the magivore that made Adam preemptively take a machete to it outside the boundary of his hostesses’ wards, lest its mere presence unravel them. 

Adam worked a curved ulu knife down the dead Torples’ sides, scraping the anti-magic slime off with the skinning blade and scooping it into nearby barrels. He vaguely felt Leah’s approach before he heard her footsteps, the icy-heat of her paranormal presence growing stronger as she approached. Once he caught sight of the familiar face, the Hunter took his hand  off the handle of a hidden blade and got back to scraping Torple slime. 

“Hey Library Warrior, could I have a minute? I need to ask you about something.” 

Having Bea back in town felt like relief.  When she died, Leah had been so caught off guard that she was always waiting for the other shoe to drop now that she was back to life.  At any given moment, she expected another phone call from Nell or Felix or anyone telling her that it happened again, that there was no way to fix it this time.  And New York felt so tauntingly far away, especially to someone who had barely ever left White Crest.  And so the news that her best friend was coming back to town made the tension ease from her neck- had she been holding her shoulders that tight the whole time she’d been away?

Maybe she had been spending too much time at the Vural Sister’s house that weekend (to be fair, one-third of the sister trio would have said any time Leah spent there was too much, but that’s besides the point), but for the tension to truly escape her, she need some real, tangible time with her friend. 

While Bea was busy inside cooking, Leah chose to explore the property outside, eager to soak up some sun and enjoy the chill of winter finally breaking.  She grimaced when she happened upon Adam, and watched him with an unamused expression.  It was kind of easy to ignore that he was a hunter, most of the time, but not when he was slicing something up right in front of her.  She let out a breath when he called out to her, sitting on her hip.

“What’s up?”, she asked.  She was sure he was just curious about a book, or something- maybe he lost his copy of Green Eggs and Ham.

“What is that there?” she asked, gesturing to the creature he was scraping.  Damn her and her innate curiosity and thirst for knowledge.

“I need to ask you about Phoenixs,” Adam replied with the blunt directness that frequently came when one was focused on multiple tasks at once. “There is a fire chicken that’s gone supernova in a valley. Luce is like...a fire scientist but she isn’t sure what would make em go..” Adam made a sound in his throat evocative of an explosion. I was wondering if you’d heard of anything like that,” the Hunter asked of the Not-Spriggan. 

Adam patted the enormous human-mouthed earthworm with a gloved hand as he scrapped more slime from the corpse into a bucket. “This is a Torple, they hunt people who do magic,” Adam supplied. “The Vural place is kinna a beacon with the Hogwarts stuff going on.” 

Leah felt her eyebrows furrow at Adam’s statement- both at the boldness with which he said it, and the statement itself.  She felt heat rise to her cheeks- did he know about her?  Was the knife he held over the creature actually intended for her- her tears or information or life? But no, Nell wouldn’t let that happen, right?  Nell would have at least warned her if he found out.   She felt herself visibly relax when he explained more, swallowing before she responded.  “Luce told me about this, but… what makes you think I know anything about phoenixes?”, she asked, trying to remain stoic and unblinking.  “They’re just about the rarest known creatures- information is pretty rare on them.”  The last time they spoke on the subject, Adam himself had thought phoenixes only ever spent time in their firestate, which was laughable, at best.  “You want to explode them?  I don’t think Luce is down with that idea. And neither am I, if you’re taking my help.  You need to find a way to cure them, not kill them.”  Killing the corrupted phoenix would be very, very easy.  Adam could take notes from Dorothy and the Wicked Witch of the West, if he wanted to be cruel like hunters tended to be.  

She pressed her lips together, unable to look at the slaughtered earthworm for too long.  Torples.  She’d heard of them, but not a ton.  She’d have to see if they had anything written up on them when she went home later tonight.  “Well- it’s good that you got it, then”, she said with an awkward nod, glancing at the bucket.  “Is the slime useful, or something?”

“Because you’re like... a supernatural librarian lady,” Adam pointed out as if this somehow gave Leah some form of nerd-omniscience. “I figured that you’d be a person to ask about something that rare y’know?”

Leah seemed to misinterpreted his amazing sound effects. “Hey hey hey,” Adam exclaimed with a note of petulance, holding up his slimy free hand in a staying gesture. “Look, that Phoenix was already exploding when we found it ok,” he asserted with boyish pique. “What I mean is that I was wondering if you knew how we could switch them into I dunno... unexplode mode, like a song, some herbs they like, an off button, we’ll take anything.” 

Adam went back to driving his blade into the annelid’s side, exposing the yellowish nerve cords beneath its ridged skin. “It interferes with magic,” he explained. “Honestly, because of how many damn Chickcharneys there are around here, I end up dunking alotta people in this slime to try and bounce the Chickcharney curse off them.” Adam chose not to mention the part where he’d erased a wizards wards with this slime and accidentally become an accessory to murder. 

Leah let out a slow breath, watching Adam carefully.  He wasn’t… wrong.  But what were the ethical implications involved with helping a hunter learn about one of the rarest, most vulnerable species that existed? 

What were they if she let someone like Adam try to figure it out on his own?

She rolled her eyes at his defense, but held her hands up in apology.  “Sorry- I shouldn’t have jumped to conclusions.”  Even though it was so hard not to with a hunter. She walked closer to him as she continued.  “I told Luce that I have an idea of how the phoenix got so out of control, but up until now, I thought it was only a myth.”  She paused- could she really trust him?  When she thought about it, she wasn’t sure, but maybe it didn’t matter.  What difference would it make if Luce and Adam were working together in this?  One way or another, Adam was going to find out.  Better it be out of the horse’s mouth.  

“We call them corrupted- it means that their ashes were on corrupted ground when they were reborn.  Sometimes the corruption happens right away, and other times the phoenix could be well into adulthood, with a life and a family before it happens.  There are no warning signs, either.   I don’t… I still haven’t found a cure in my research, but…”  She took a deep breath before continuing, and her next words came out faster than she intended.  “If this phoenix doesn’t survive…whatever you end up doing... the best way to help them in the next life is to keep their ashes somewhere safe and sacred.”

At that imagery, Leah couldn’t help but crack a smile.  “Are you telling me you make a habit out of performing Torple Slime Baptisms, so to speak?”

The palpable feelings of otherness intensified as Leah got closer, there’d been a time when Adam would have immediately gone into fight or flight mode when his Hunter senses reacted. But in White Crest he’d had to acclimate. That conditioning was an asset when hunting alghoul out in the sticks, but here it could end up him going all kill-zone on a librarian. 

Adam paused his gory worm skinning and listened to Leah as she spoke. He noticed the use of the word ‘we’ but kept silent and impassive during the explanation. It turned out that Luce had already tapped Leah on this matter, which was unsurprising. But while he’d hadn’t doubted that she was knowledgeable, Adam’d already suspected that Ramirez wasn’t your average bibliophile, but she knew even legends of the legend. 

“We ….as in the Maine librarian’s union?”  Adam’s question was playfully phrased. There were many species, secret societies, and so on that did not appreciate their ways being pried into, and Adam didn’t want to start shit with the one person who seemed to have solid intel on Chernobyl phoenix. 

“I would rather they survive,” Adam assured. “At the end of the day I’ll do what it takes to protect civilians, but from what you’ve said it sounds like this is some demon radiation juju that they didn’t have any say in.” 

Adam inhaled. “But, if it does come to that, has your research given you any idea of a holy place that’d work for keeping the ashes safe? Maybe some place sacred to uh...I don’t know if Phoenixes worship any gods,” he admitted. “But maybe somewhere that means alot to their culture?”

The unexpected jocularity of the question, from Leah especially, took Adam openly off-guard, teasing a sheepish smile from him. “Uh yeah actually,” he admitted while scrapping some more slime off the giant mage-eater worm into a bucket. “It’s not glamorous and the clients always hate it, but the Torple-dunkage sometimes works for really minor stuff like that.”

Leah blanched, blinking at Adam’s question.  Had she been so careless to say we?  “I uh… we as in, me.  Of course. Me,us.  And the other people who are interested in supernatural history.”  She swallowed, unsure if Adam were picking up on her status as a phoenix or her status as a scribe.  Possibly both, right?  This close, he had to be having those creepy senses that she wasn’t as human as she appeared.  Either way, it was bad news.  

“I’d rather that too, but I don’t think it’s unrealistic to prepare for the worst, either.” Something Adam said struck a chord in Leah, and she couldn’t stop herself before she commented.  “I mean, that’s true of most supernatural creatures though, isn’t it?  Born or bitten, werewolves, zombies, and vampires didn’t have a say in.  Do you grant them the same courtesy when they’re out of control?”

“I know a few places that could work”, she said, crossing her arms over her chest.  Whether she would tell Adam unless he absolutely needed them- that was another story.  “Not necessarily a culture to be had per say.  Because of their rarity and ability to blend in, it’s not often a phoenix ever meets another like them in their lifetime.”  She and her family were so incredibly lucky to have each other to love; to grow and learn from when they were the most vulnerable.  “I...know a family that would take care of the baby once they’re reborn, too, so-... if it comes to that, it’ll be all covered.”   

Leah let herself get a good look at the creature, taking as many mental notes as she could to write down later.  Sometimes Adam wasn’t as bad as he seemed.  “I think most people would be pissed if you dunked them into a baby pool of slime and sludge.  I certainly would.”

“It depends,” Adam answered without any attempt at dissemblance. “Gotta measure their life against the lives of those they’d kill when outta control,” the Hunter continued as he got down from the rock he’d been perched on to move his flaying blade to the Torple’s lower portion. “Most humans just get ripped in half if they meet a vamp that's gone all hunger frenzy, but I was born strong enough to match them,” he reasoned. “In the ideal scenario I wrestle the vamp or whatever off the civilian and get them to snap out of it.” 

Adam took the long strip of worm skin over to a tree and slung it over one of the branches to dry in the sunshine. “But uh, reality doesn’t give ideal scenarios most of the time y’know? Sometimes you have to make a split-second judgement or alotta people die,” the Hunter admitted. “ But yeah, I guess the best answer I can give you is that I try.” 

“That uh...sounds pretty lonely, being all human torchy and not having anything to relate to what the hell is going on,” Adam admitted, as he walked back to the Torple corpse. “Do you do the supernatural foster care stuff alot Leah?” 

Adam rolled his eyes amiably at the resistance to necessary alien-worm slime dunking. “Hey  Chick-a-Curses are worse though. Like all of their hexes are bad, but the one your head twists backwards...gah!  I either have to bribe a witch to visit their hospital room and decurse them, or I have to sneak in and pour worm slime over some poor bastard in a hospital bed and hope it works.” 

“Most vamps get stabbed if they meet an egotistical hunter”, Leah countered immediately.  “I appreciate your attempt to be civil in the way you handle things, but I don’t find the same to be true for most hunters.”  She couldn’t help but get into these debates with the hunters in her life, and if she were being honest, she didn’t really tire of them, either.

“It’s not all bad.  I know you assumed at first that they’re literal chickens, but like I said- phoenixes spend most of their time looking like humans.  And while a lot of them end up growing up not knowing what they are until they sneeze some smoke or look for a reason feathers are popping out of their foreheads, they’re not lost for companionship.  I’ve even heard tell of families who are able to stay together throughout their cyclical lives, raising each other generation after generation.  This is incredibly rare, of course.”

She blanched at Adam’s next question, opening her mouth and closing it.  She thought of the golden goose egg, still safely incubating in her basement, surely ready to hatch at any moment.  “I… how did you know I meant myself?”

Leah couldn’t help but laugh at his anecdotes, no matter how much she wanted to disavow them for being those of a hunter.  “That doesn’t sound like a fun way to wake up- are witches so untrustworthy of you that they don’t trust that your slime is for good?”

Adam rolled his eyes with a smirk. “Y’know, if I made the same argument in reverse about ‘most vamps’ being violent and evil you’d call me out for generalizing and being a bigot Ramirez,” he pointed out. 

Adam decided not to point out the fact that statistically the deaths on humans at the hands of vampires were uncountable orders of magnitude greater than vampires dying to Hunters. But frankly, it was pretty fucking obvious that Leah considered one supernatural life precious, but human lives were just numbers to her, devoid of emotional significance unless she knew them personally. 

It’s pointless to argue with people like that. 

“You don’t know ‘most Hunters’ Leah, not even close,” Adam pointed out bluntly, “Look Ramirez you hate people like me for reasons that are obviously personal. I’m fine with that.” the footballer said with a shrug of his broad shoulders, as if he felt this truce of hate sufficient. “It’s chill. 

Despite the slip into harsh words, Adam continued to listen patiently to the talk of phoenixes, families, and cycles of rebirth. It was all pretty surreal honestly. What would it be like to be with his family across a thousand lives over and over?

He wouldn’t know. Adam had grown up being raised with the knowledge that every moment with his family was precious, that he needed to learn how to survive on his own before they fell one by one in the line of duty. 

Adam hacked into the Torple with an unnecessary force as his chest constricted. 

“Do they line...remember each other each rebirth? Or are they all new different people each time?”

Leah’s unexpected motion of surprise caused Adam’s attention to flick to her instinctively, but her following question dispelled the moment of tenseness. “I didn’t,” he admitted. “I more meant that you seemed to already have homes in mind as if you were a supernatural social worker or somethin.” 

“You….really down to be a fire mom Leah?”

Adam considered Leah’s question for a moment. “I think that magic, like all resources, should be used for the betterment of society,” Adam said, hinting at a certain level of utopianism behind the memes and crass commentary. “But I can’t force everyone to think that way. If I’m going to bug a busy sorceress to leave her research to cure some rando she doesn’t know, I need to be able to pay her. Just how it is.’ 

Leah rolled her eyes, crossing her arms over her chest.  Adam was ignoring the fact that the violence that came from vampires was out of their control, and many of the deaths that came from them were for a need to survive.  Hunters, however, had plenty of control over what they did, and though there were a few gentle ones like Adam or Kaden, most would do what they did for sport, if given the chance.

“Neither do you”, she shot back.  And he’d never had to fear them, either.  She’d read countless stories about the atrocities they’d committed, and so excuse her if she didn’t trust a hunter as far as she could through them.

Again, his questions about phoenixes gave her pause.  Was this information relevant?  “It depends”, she explained.  “Not always concrete memories that you or I might have from last week or last year, but it’s more like… glimpses or feelings.  Sometimes even that doesn’t pop up right away, either.  Most phoenixes end up with a touchstone through most of their lives to help them connect.”  The touchstones didn’t always work.  She felt an invisible buzzing pull from the stone around her neck, taunting and teasing.  

She blanched at his elaboration, embarrassed that she’d assumed so quickly.  She didn’t hate the idea of that type of job, if she were being honest- supernatural social work sounded extremely fulfilling.  “Maybe I am on the side”, she teased.

“If it came down to it, yes.  But even if I couldn’t, there are arrangements I could make, if I’m being completely transparent.  Do you think you’d do the same thing, if you needed to?”

“I agree- but sometimes an idea like that is hard, because the idea of a better society can be so subjective and even divisive, you know?  What you and I think might be wonderful isn’t going to be the same as Joe who works at Excalibur.”  It was true,  Excalibur Joe had told her more than once that he thought the world would be better off without traffic lights.  “That’s not to say I don’t think betterment can happen- it’s just that the hard part is figuring out exactly what that betterment is for everyone.”

“You're right,” Adam allowed with the rueful triumph of someone who felt pain after a headbutt but took satisfaction in his opponent getting the worst of it. 

“Hmmm that sucks,” Adam mused as Leah explained firebird memories. “Guess that’s why we haven’t just solved all history questions with a few Phoenix interviews,” he reasoned.

Adam was quiet for a time as he flayed off more worm skin and yellow cutaneous tissues. “Maybe that’s better though,” he admitted after a while. “Dealing with one lifetime of going through shit is hard enough to deal with,” said the young man who trained and exercised himself to exhaustion in order to sleep. “Having to remember like other lives of horrible crap too? Don't think I could deal with it, i’d completely lose it.” 

Well ok, lose it sooner than most Hunters, Adam admitted to himself, knowing that after a time the human brain can only see so much before you start to break inside. 

“I think you’d do good at it,” Adam noted, meeting Leah’s joke with earnestness. “A foster advocate for kids i mean.” 

“Mhm. My parents adopted Hunters who were orphaned or whatnot, and I’d do the same,” Adam explained, to the question of whether he’d adopt as if there were only one answer. “Whether I take in kids or am a father, I’ll teach em how to survive,” said the Hunter, something in his tone suggesting this grim promise was the purest expression of parental love. 

“People are never going to agree on betterment,” asserted the young man born into a world of war with a shrug. “We just gotta decide what parts of our ideal world we have to get by force,”  and when talking things out is better,” said Adam. 

Leah had her mouth open, ready and willing to argue more, when Adam said that she was right.  She closed her mouth, sending him a resolute nod.  She sure was.   If only it were this easy to convince Kaden.

“Maybe, but I think it’s more the fact that they’re so rare.  Knowledge about them might even be scarce on purpose, in order to protect them.”  Did Adam know about the healing tears? Would he understand why they needed protection?  “Perhaps every life doesn’t have to be horrible, though.  It must be torture to know you’ve lived, say… three or four lifetimes before but have no idea about everything you learned throughout them”.

She smiled sheepishly at his compliment, pressing her lips together in earnest.  “Thank you”, she started.  “It means a lot.”

Adam raising children into more hunters was decidedly not what Leah was talking about, but his comments about his parents intrigued her.  “You had a lot of adopted siblings growing up, then?”  She didn’t want to delve into what he might have meant by ‘teach them how to survive’.

“I guess I just wonder who gets to decide”, she mused, turning back toward the house as she heard her name called in the distance. “My ideal would be to not have to do it by force, but I suppose that’s why Luce insists I’m an optimist.” She let out a breath, pressing her lips together in a smile.  “Did you have any other questions… about phoenixes?”

Adam nodded. “I mean I have alot of family in general like siblings, cousins, so on. As a kid it didn’t make much difference which ones had my blood or not. Some little Hunters were adopted fully, others just came to live with us and be trained for a few years,” the Hunter shrugged, indicating perhaps that his household had been a lively place full of both laughter and endless preparations for war. 

“That’s always the trick huh,” Adam affirmed with a grimace. “With Democracy you just get mob rule and decisions made without long term planning. With some elite body you get corruption and unaccountability,” the frat boy noted with a salience his professors would never hear him express in class. “I don’t think anybody’s solved that question yet.” 

Adam glanced toward the house and looked back to Leah, brown eyes intent for a time, hands dripping with the slime and blood of the massive witcheater. 

“Thanks Ramirez, I think I have what I need,” said the Hunter with the soft finality of someone who’d just come to a decision. “....sorry for keeping ya,” 

[apothecarinomicon]

Spring week 4 part 3

After my hectic experience with the marshbloom, I decided to take a day for myself. Greenmoor isn’t anywhere near the ocean, but Meltwater Loch is big enough that I figured a day spent there could be considered a beach day. And after the couple of weeks I’d had, boy did I need a beach day.

But anyone who’s read this far ought to be familiar with my luck by now. There’s a lot to record, but I’ll try to get it down in order.

 ────⊱⁜⊰──── 

It was a beautiful day—clear blue sky, warm air, and (at least when I first arrived) no one around at Meltwater Loch. I spread out a towel on the beach and laid down for a good session of sunbathing. I’ve never been one for tanning, but  simply laying doing nothing while being warmed by the sun and cooled by the breeze felt absolutely decadent.

After a while of simply existing, I became aware of the sound of a bird calling above me. I cracked my eyes open and recognized the large forms of a pair of gull-drakes flying overhead. Gull-drakes are a strange hybrid, both reptilian and avian. Their torsos and wings are feathered, while their heads, tails, and talons are scaled. They do have beaks like gulls, but their tails are prehensile like their alleged draconic ancestors’. I say ‘alleged’ because no one knows how the hybrid gull-drake came into being. The sheer anatomy and scale discrepancy between the average seagull and the average dragon fossil (they were much larger in ancient times than the pocket-sized lizards we have today) seems to rule out any cross-breeding. Additionally, the typical combination of traits displayed by gull-drakes is too awkward and ungainly to be the result of natural selection. And yet, there have been records of the gull-drake’s existence for just about as long as there have been records—the third-oldest surviving written document, in fact, is a bestiary which includes them along dozens of other species, most of which are now extinct.

Nature is a strange thing.

Digressions aside, there was a reason this caught my attention. Gull-drakes are scavengers, and have been known to leave catches uneaten while they go out to hunt for more. It’s just an evolutionary quirk—they prefer to feast only once per day. This means that, as they leave their nests unattended, some other opportunistic creature could come by and steal their catch. 

It’s easy to identify a gull-drake nest, too—they tend to be very large, and are often positioned balanced atop large, pointy rocks. If a gull-drake catches you stealing, though, it’ll chase you and squawk at you and try to peck you until you drop the stolen goods and flee. They’re not too smart, though, so hiding in nearby foliage (say, a patch of large ferns) will fool them easily.

All of this to say, I managed to get myself a shock fish without a rod, all while only getting chased a little ways by a jealous, stupid bird.

 ────⊱⁜⊰──── 

As I returned to my towel, I heard an unusual sound—the put-put-put of a motor. Machinery of that kind is a fairly new invention, and unless you know how to make it, very expensive.

The woman driving the boat certainly looked like she knew how to make a motor. She was dwarven, with russet hair and a long beard, both held in thick braids. She was (as dwarves are) rather short—I'd estimate maybe one-and-a-fifth meters tall, and nearly as wide—with large hands and feet, and limbs thickly corded with muscle. She wore dark green coveralls and had a fairly heavy-duty fishing rod held in one hand so that it rested on her shoulder.

She shut the motor off as she neared and called out to me, asking if I was the village witch. I said that I was, and she told me that she was friends with my crocodilian patient. She thanked me for helping him, and said he would have been a goner without my potion-making skills. I demurred just a bit, saying I wasn't the only healer who helped him that day. She scoffed and dismissed my humility outright, saying that I might as well have been the only one—that without my care the village doctor wouldn't have been able to do anything.

She introduced herself as Janneth Hillhorn, and I told her my name in turn. She asked what I was doing out by Meltwater Loch and I told her I was taking a day off. She let me know that her cottage was just around the other side of the lake, near Glimmerwood Grove and right on the border of Blastfire Bog, and that I should feel free to stop in any time. I thanked her.

At this point, there was a tremor in the water. It couldn't have been an earthquake because the land wasn't shaking, but the water abruptly became much more active. Ocean-like waves crashed into the shore and Janneth held tight onto the sides of her boat, doing her best not to capsize. I would have been quite alarmed in her situation, but Janneth barely seemed preturbed. I asked something along the lines of "what the blight is going on?!" As the water settled, Janneth told me that this was a common occurence on Meltwater Loch, a quirk that—many said—was due to the emotions of its guardian sea-dragon, Bàs Bàta. I found this explanation rather silly, reminiscent of an old wives' tale. I'd never heard of a sea-dragon before, and given that the name ‘Bàs Bàta’ directly translated to "boat death," I figured it was just a local story told to frighten children and dismissed it out of hand.

Astute readers should be growing worried for me right about now.

Janneth offered to give me one of the fish she'd caught as a thanks for helping her friend. I initially refused, but she insisted. She looked through her basket and pulled out a dentist crab. The gel their claws produce is good for the mouth and plenty else besides, so I accepted and thanked her. She thanked me right back and said (perhaps jokingly?) not to run afoul of Bàs Bàta while I was out by the loch. I forced a laugh as she sped away.

Once she was out of sight, I collected some claw gel from the dentist crab and released it back into the water.

 ────⊱⁜⊰──── 

There was another rumbling as I made my way back to the beach, and as it abated I saw something bob up to the surface of the water close to the shore. It presented itself, et cetera et cetera, I waded in to see what it was.

I scooped it out of the water and found myself holding a glass bottle, like the kind that rum or sweet wine would come in, sealed with a cork and containing a rolled-up sheet of paper. Of course, I opened it immediately. I found that the sheet inside wasn’t quite *paper,* but something more slippery—maybe made of seaweed? It did have writing on it, though. As I unfurled it, a few things that looked like pebbles fell out. I barely managed to catch them before they hit the surface of the water. I put them in my pocket for safe keeping.

The writing on the note was as follows, with no spelling changes by me:

Let it be known that I fink this whole exercise is stupid. And pointless. And probly meant as some kind of sick, twisted punishment. No one but little kids believe in terrafolk, so I don’t know why the instructress is making us do this.

Even if anyfing could live above the water, there’s no way its advanced enough to read. How would it get all the minerals it needs wivout processing the water?

But anyway. I guess I ave to fulfill the prompt. 

Me name is Genoveva, I live in the I.S.A.C.S. (that's short for 'Isolated Sovereign Aquatic City-State, but we all just pronounce it like 'Isax") and I’m in the fifth year of me education. I hate me name. I wish I could ave somefing exotic like a John or a Steve or a Sarah, but I’m stuck wiv boring old Genoveva. If you’re somehow able to read this, that must mean you ave schools on the surface, too. Wat ar they like? Ar they as boring up there? We all ave to sit in a circle and listen to the instructress drone on and on and on.

I live wiv me merma and me perpa and me two baby brothers. Do you ave family? I've got loads of cousins too.

On the rubric it says I ave to include a small gift, so I'm putting some fossil fish scales in wiv this letter. I found em on me way to school this morning and there not of use to me, but I figure you probly don't ave fish on land so maybe scales ar valuable up there.

If you're inclined to write back (no pressure), you can just pop your note in the bottle and put it back into the water. It'll find its way to me—there's magic all around, don't you know.

Signed,

Genoveva Galbrait, 5th year

[An accessible version of this letter can be found here.]

The letter obviously has some pretty complex implications. An entire society under the surface of Meltwater Loch, entirely unaware of the world above the surface beyond fairy stories? What must life be like down there? What kind of society must they have? How do they supply food? Get rid of waste?

What resources might be available there that can't be found on the surface?

I decided that somehow I was going to find a way to visit ISACS, and learn everything I could about it. I bet that would impress the University of Arcbridge. I wasn't sure how I would breathe under the water for long enough, but I was determined to find a way.

Take your final guesses now what happened next.

That water-quaking started up again, this time stronger than before. Waves crashed against the beach where I stood, and I felt a great vibration in my chest and in my head. 

And then, it broke the surface of the water.

Giant and blue-green and serpentine, Bàs Bàta rose up before me. A blighting sea-dragon, it stood straight up in the air at least twice as tall as my cottage—and that was just the part of its body I could see. Its head was shaped like the tip of an arrow, with three great spikes sprouting out of the back (the outer two longer than the middle one). It let loose another deep roar, dousing me in spittle. It thrashed about, causing great waves to crash onto the shore, and through my shock I realized its movements might be less characteristic of anger than of pain.

My suspicions were confirmed when it roared again: one of the fangs right near the front of its mouth was missing a chip, and had a great crack running nearly all the way up to the root. That had to hurt. I'd never treated a non-humanoid  before—or, for that matter, a cracked tooth—but I realized even past the moral obligation to help, there was no way I could access the underwater city-state without calming Bàs Bàta down.

I found out later, after I'd scrambled away from the lake and sprinted back to the cottage, after wiping the saliva off of me and getting at least some of it in a bottle for potion use, that the saliva was actually a really useful ingredient in treating shattered teeth. As it turns out, it's a pretty strong painkiller. Unfortunately, I knew I'd need more than just that to make a cure, and with the sheer size of Bàs Bàta, I suspected I'd need to make more than one potion.

That will have to be a longer term project, then, because the events of my relaxation day have worn me out. I've got to get to bed. We'll see what tomorrow brings.

⇦●〇●⇨

[tenmillionwhumperflies]

Cloudwalker Series Part 10

Bit of plot building and also a broken, and very sad Ihuka. The only warnings I can see are a very vague implication of a character death and maybe a warning for loneliness and a fear of being alone?

Master-list Here

Approx WC: 2200

Avizon did not wake them in the morning, but Ihuka woke to the smell of food. He was so hungry, but he didn't want to wake Dyan, he didn't want to get in trouble. He'd lost, he accepted with great heartache that Avizon was now his master. That meant doing what he wanted, but what did he even want? He couldn't understand him.

Ihuka lay still, musing over how much pain he was in, the deep burning aching that shrouded his body. The slimes and other things Avizon had put on his back felt like they’d faded away, leaving him in agony again. He couldn’t help but whine. He wondered what else Avizon would do to him if he was bad again. 

Dyan was still asleep, no doubt tired from his night terror. Ihuka wanted to stay in bed and go back to sleep but his wild instincts wanted him to get up, to get up, get on with it and survive. Instead all he could do was cuddle up to Dyan and wait for his master’s return. It was nice being able to hold Dyan, to feel the rise and fall of his chest, the hot air stroking his shoulder and parts of his chest that weren’t wrapped up in bandages. It was good to not be alone anymore.

When the door did open, Dyan groaned and woke up, rubbing his eye clumsily with his hand. “Master?” “Wake up, little birds,” Avizon said softly. He approached Ihuka and put a hand on his forehead. Ihuka flinched and squeaked immediately. He didn’t want to hurt anymore, no more!

“Easy, Ihuka, easy now. Today, you stay in bed, you have a fever. Dyan, I have a job for you this afternoon. Eat your breakfasts, then I want you to get dressed and go to the main hall. You remember the way?” “Yes, master.”

Avizon nodded and left again. The two cloudwalkers carefully peeled themselves out of bed to eat their meals on the floor.

Ihuka watched Dyan with curiosity. If he did what he did then maybe he wouldn’t get in trouble. He watched as he ate, picking up food with his hands and pushing it into his mouth. Ihuka did the same, but his attention wandered to Dyan’s missing horn. “What happened to it?” Dyan looked up, to see where Ihuka’s eyes were looking, but then he realised. “My horn? It… It got cut off by humans, because I tried to escape… It hurt… so much…” he shuddered. Ihuka frowned, raising his hand to touch it, but thinking better of it. “I’ve never seen one broken like that before, but the rest of it will still grow into a spiral. You haven’t lost much once it’s grown at least.” Dyan looked down glumly at his food. “That's true, but sometimes I can still feel the pain… Could we please talk about something else? Master wanted me to teach you human words. Maybe we could try some?”

Ihuka nodded. He needed to learn the language if he wanted to stay safe. He quietly tried to form the few words he knew, even if he didn’t understand them. He spent a few minutes trying to discover the new sounds in his mouth, how to make the M sound, and giggling to himself when he felt the vibrations in his throat.

Dyan sat with him and helped to teach him some sounds that he’d need, and Ihuka was eager to learn. Dyan taught him a few words, Master, bed, food, and blanket, and his first phrase: I’m sorry. Ihuka kept trying until he was able to make his words sound less hissy. Dyan praised him as though he were a brother, smiling gently.

“Humans aren’t usually nice creatures, but they hurt less when you make them happy,” Dyan said. “That’s why I sit still, let him cut my nails and everything else. There’s no point trying to stop them. They get what they want and they’ll hurt you to get it.”

Ihuka frowned, but he understood.

Dyan got dressed into his nice clothes and dusted them off. “Master wanted you to stay here because you are hurting. I will be back later. Keep practising your sounds, and try to sleep. Sleep helps.” Ihuka nodded with another frown. He didn’t want to be on his own anymore. Dyan could see that quite easily. Dyan helped him back onto the bed and hugged him for a moment. “I’ll be back later, promise.”

Dyan left the room and went the way he'd went the day before. He was confident he knew where the main hall was, that big room with the throne- or was that the throne room? Dyan frowned, hoping he was going the right way.

Avizon was waiting in the hallway by the large room. “Ah, so you did know your way, good bird. Is Ihuka behaving himself?”

“Yes, master, I taught him his letters so he’s practising. He’s trying very hard for you.” “Good… good. The sooner he learns, the better. I realise my harshness with his punishment means he is afraid of me, more so than I want him to be. I think being able to understand each other will help remedy that.”

“He hurts badly, master. He can’t move very well.” “I know, and if your work is good today, I will make a potion to fix that.” “Of course, master, but what is it you want me to do?” Dyan asked nervously. Avizon smirked. “Follow me, little bird. There’s… something I need to understand about you.” Dyan gulped but followed him up the stairs, past Ihuka’s room. He went inside to give him more of that plant to chew on which helped with pain, then he locked the door and then on to a spiral staircase. They went up and up until Dyan’s legs ached.

But finally they came to a door, and Avizon ushered him inside. “Your species really are remarkable. Your venom is so often collected to use on arrowheads. Your feathers make an excellent fuel and incredible explosive source once treated by a professional hand.” Dyan pursed his lips and lowered his head. Avizon took him by the chin. “And last night, when you had a dream, you saw me when I looked into your mind. You change things, Dyan, you’ve changed everything. It’s not just a case of biology anymore, but magic.” “I… I thought that was common knowledge that sorcerers can harvest our feathers for power, master?” “Yes, but you showed the potential to wield it. It’s not just that you have something magic that you don’t use… Turn around little bird, I’d like a single feather from you.” Dyan obeyed wordlessly. He yelped as Avizon tugged one out and compared it to one of Ihuka’s black feathers. He frowned. “Ihuka’s is more powerful on the surface, I can feel it… but why- well, there could be a number of reasons, wing colour, age, your broken horn-” “I’m sorry, master. W.would you return me to the market?” Dyan whimpered. “I. I can still serve you if you only wanted the feathers, I can still be useful-” Avizon hushed him gently. “Steady, little one. You’re still mine. I am too powerful to solely depend on feathers, it is more of a bonus, you feathers use different magic from what I am used to wielding, light and pure magic, something truly good in this cruel world. You’re going nowhere- Dyan, I’ve told you this. I won’t change my mind.”

Dyan nodded with a shaky breath. “Yes, master, I’m sorry.” He watched as he lay the feathers side by side. “You are indeed a mystery but you need have no fear. I will not hurt you to find out, besides, that is for another day. Today, I want you to simply tidy up this room while I work. I will give you instructions, simple ones, and once Ihuka is healed, I will give you both larger rooms to clean.” “Yes, Master. I. I can do that.” Avizon set him to work while Avizon studied the two feathers. The quiet was more comfortable than Dyan expected, but he still wanted to be finished as quickly as possible. He hoped Ihuka was alright. “I want you to take this tapestry outside and clean it, you know how to do that?” “I think so, Master, but perhaps you could tell me how you want it done? I wouldn’t want to make a mistake.”

So Avizon patiently explained, and then Dyan carefully picked it up and took it away. Avizon watched him from his balcony as he beat the dust and grime out of it, and then started to carefully clean it. He worked fast, but also with great care. It soon changed from a dirty rag into a vibrant tapestry. Dyan heaved it back inside and hung it up once it was almost dry. He looked at Avizon with big eyes, like a puppy waiting for a reward.

Avizon smiled and gently patted his head. “I’m impressed. Well done.” “Is that your castle on there?” Dyan asked quietly. “Yes,” Avizon mused, “but this tapestry is old. This was made long before I took over, before I stole it from the king.” “You did?” Dyan breathed, stunned.

“Yes, I stole what was precious to him because he took something… incredibly precious from me. The king was not a nice man, nor was his daughter. It has been a long time, but I am ready to restore this building, to make it even better than it was. I plan to change this world, Dyan, no soul will live their life without hearing my name, but what kind of change, good or bad, well, I am yet to make up my mind. I’ve been feeling... different, over the last few days.”

“Whatever your decision, it will be an honour to serve you.”

Avizon smirked. “You may go now, the key is still in the lock, turn it and it will open.” Dyan frowned. “Was I not good enough to earn the reward for Ihuka?” Avizon opened his drawer, “Yes, of course you were. I admit it slipped my mind.”

Avizon went into the corner of the room, where hundreds of bottles were lined up, all cleaned and lined up nicely thanks to Dyan’s work. He mixed a few together and mixed it with a finger. Then he took a black feather, cut off the end and closed his eyes. Dyan could see the power slip out of it, into the liquid Avizon had made. It immediately changed colour, became a shining iridescent and glowing liquid. “This should help him regain his strength. Let us go and see the little demon.”

They found him curled up on the floor under the blanket, a sobbing shaking mess.

His breathing was raspy and he had old tears in his eyes, a flushed face. He looked awful, so sick and weak and tired. Dyan rushed to his side with a worried cheeping noise. He nudged Ihuka gently and encouraged him to open his eyes. Dyan could see his pain, the upset. Ihuka grabbed him and wrapped him in a tight hug. “Please don’t leave me alone…” he whimpered. “What does he say?” Avizon asked softly, kneeling down beside him and feeling Ihuka's forehead again. “He’s… begging me to not leave him on his own.” Dyan stared in horror. Avizon sighed softly and sat Ihuka up against the wall, but he didn’t have much strength left in him. Avizon had no choice but to sit beside him, holding him and supporting him like an infant in his arms. “Alright… Ihuka, drink.” Ihuka was uneasy, but he did so, coughing badly once he’d drank it and screwing up his face. “M.Math-Master?” Ihuka managed, the word didn’t sit comfortably on his tongue, he wasn’t used to speaking as humans did. Still, Avizon smiled and praised him. “Good bird! Good bird. What else did you learn?” “I… I sorry… I bad.” Avizon stroked his cheek and this time Ihuka relaxed against the feeling.

“You’re a clever little thing,” Avizon said, gently continuing his praise as he lifted him into bed and rearranged the blanket. Dyan took off his clothes so that he could lie down on the bed with Ihuka, cuddling with him. Ihuka clung to him as tight as he could. 

"It seems the pain I caused you wasn't the only thing which broke your spirit… You suffered when you were alone down there?" Avizon frowned. "Social creatures indeed…" He could only imagine how cloudwalkers felt when they were the only one bought.

Ihuka looked up at him with wide and fearful eyes. Avizon ruffled his hair with care and then looked at Dyan.

"Tomorrow after breakfast come to the tower again. Bring Ihuka. He can sleep upstairs while you work," Avizon said. Dyan nodded. "Yes, thank you, Master." Avizon ruffled Dyan's hair and felt Ihuka's forehead again. "I'll bring you both some food and water. You can both sleep if you want."

Ihuka snuggled further against Dyan's chest and Avizon sighed. "If he gets worse, tell me. Shout, I'll hear." "I will, thank you, Master."

As Avizon left, Ihuka broke into sobs and clung even tighter to Dyan. Dyan held him back, wrapping his wings around him and whispered, "It's okay. I'm here. I will always be here for you." He was no Ryuvek, no leader or his brother by blood, he never would be, but he was Dyan, and he would do all he could to look after him.

[weirdo-with-a-nametag]

Brain is tv static with random frames interspersed

Think I'm like. Really stressed and jumping between topics to try and find something that helps / feels good

Topics:

Anyone know a good health tracking app for adhd people? I want one that like pops up when you open your phone, maybe? But is unobtrusive. Like maybe you just rate your mood or whatever when you open your phone, and it closes, and you go about your business. I just hate every app and paper method I've tried but really want to track some stuff

Pigeon. ? Pigeon as pet?

Service animals re: cats, pigeons, my cat specifically, and then also ESAs and also what to use as treats while training my cat (he's pretty happy to learn behaviors with praise and pets as reinforcement, but treats would make everything move much faster, but I haven't found something I want to give him so we've just been y'know. Chillin)

Service animals re: what tasks can my pet potentially do that would help me? I don't really know a lot about service animals and there is a Huge range. If anyone has suggestions, or places to read about it, I'd appreciate it! Mostly thinking they may help with anxiety, sensory, and mobility/fatigue related stuff. Not much of a need for medical alerts.

Bioactive enclosures for my snakes, need to research their biomes and make progress on designs and equipment specifications

Also. Hit a seriously hard patch and haven't been handling them much at all this month so that's not great

Casting stuff. Saw jewelry today made of metal casts of claws, skulls, etc, and they were really well done and made me want to do that

Some taxidermy / vulture culture stuff I won't get into right now

Puzzles????

How to organize my room

Need a shower

Need to organize bathroom

So Much Schoolwork

Uhhhhh trying, but not making much headway, to figure out how I want to do my music collection. Also really need to clean my records..

Make?

Food??? Ew.

Dental hygiene ://

Plampts. So many. Houseplants need maintenance, many need repotting. Keep taking in people's problem plants and like, they're doing better, largely, after being trimmed and watered and whatnot, but need repotting. Also need to trim some aquarium plants.

Also need to put water in tanks. And spray nepenthes.

Laundry.

Gotta pick up trash in my room. There's so much. Everywhere. Why.

Schoolwork. I'm so behind. So, so stuck. Kind of feel like I'm dying.

Going on a picnic tomorrow. Have to figure out what still needs doing for that, probably need to go to the store.

Leo needs water. I'm so....ugh, I'm trying so hard, but it feels impossible. I do my best to take good care of my pets, and I think they live pretty good lives most of the time, but sometimes I get like This and completely drop off the face of the earth and then like, wake up or whatever and two weeks have passed by and I have not cleaned a water bowl! That's a serious problem!!!! I do not know how to combat that, really, besides more reminders. Having someone around who is willing to like, help, when things are especially hard, would be great, but I don't live with my partner right now and do not feel like I can ask anyone here for that. But I can't put my animals at risk. I check on them every day, and if their bowls are dirty I do take them out and clean them, but sometimes (like now) i cannot get myself to do it without a pressure like a dirty bowl, or a feeding day. And like, it's really important that they have clean water. I'm talking to myself here but like, if anyone has advice. Please. With the tank redesigns and upgrades, the bowls will be more accessible, which will help because one of them is very heavy at the angle I have to pick it up, and another requires moving a lot of branches and is best to take out while the snake is out (this is Leo) which is fine because I love my boy, but adds time to the process, and makes it harder to start, you know? Maybe if I just got more bowls - I could take the bowl out and immediately replace it, fill the new one, and replace the decor and snake, and then clean the bowl as a separate task? That would be easier for my brain. Currently I have a Specific bowl I prefer to use for each tank, and then everything else is Just In Case, but I mean. Acquiring extras is something I want to do anyway, and it may help with several problems, so. Yeah. I'll try that. But also, any other ideas, guys?

Anxiety: can't stop picking at my face, skin, nails, cuticles, scalp, pretty much everywhere with callouses, also scratched a mole off my face, which is something I've been trying Not to do for a while, so that's...not great. Can't find my earmuffs, and also all of my headphones are painful? Ears are really sensitive lately.

Been playing a lot of Moth Game (flutter: starlight if you wanna be friends say hey I don't know how to do it but would enjoy talking about moths if nothing else. The game is just like, an idle ish collecting game with cutesy versions of different species, and very little actual information, but it's still fun, and if anyone else is on there and also Into Moths like I am, hiiiii) and like it's fun and cute but also greatly impacting my productivity, and raises my stress levels during events, which is most days, so the game has. Not been helping. But I can't stop because then I'll miss Exclusive Moths.

Anyway. Had baklava and two mugs of Thai tea today and the sugar has made me nauseous.

Trying to journal. Hurts to write. Also takes too long. Also my handwriting is very bad. But typing is..not as good

Want to draw. Thinking about drawing cats

Plants again! Want to make seed bombs, have seeds, have most of the other ingredients, just need to put em together, basically.

Really sad :(

Or am I?

Weird noise coming from dining room?

Birds. Spent half an hour at least on the deck tonight listening to a hundred different bird calls (literally) to identify one I was hearing, it was a pine siskin, which I checked early on but the recording was bad and I didn't realize which call was identified. Anyway, cool to put a name to a face, so to speak.

Need to practice for ASL

So much.....to do...

Only had like >3 hours of work this week which was not great because money, but also like I'm really feeling those 3 hours....

My cat is basically refusing to come into my room? Which is very strange and I'm worried something is Off but cannot figure out what. Also means less cuddles which means I'm sad.

It feels strange whenever people follow me, the attention is nice but I have no idea what content y'all are here for. So to everyone: hi, enjoy, hope my random personal posts aren't a surprise to anyone who followed for like. News reblogs and informational stuff.

Do I even have it in me to..be successful in school? Should I drop out of college? I'm struggling really hard and do not feel like I'm building on the skills I need to continue, so like. Uh.

My dad is being. Abrasive.

Mom and grandma are very angry lately

Housemate is also angry, about things i thought we were on good terms about, so I am stressed because like,, are we okay?

Can't find my eye mask :(

Yoga? Like...restorative yoga? Need to track down my PT stuff. And. Do it.

Need to put the stickers on my license plates....oops...

Still haven't found my antidepressants! Yay!

Do I want to store my stuff in open bins, or with lids? Which stuff needs spill protection and stacking capability and which stuff needs easy access?

How to earn money without..chaos

Gotta go to the pet store tomorrow. Have to compile my list of pet store items i need. Uhhhhhhhhhh

Also I have an essay due tomorrow that I've barely started. So. Wooooooo

Kt tape for supporting arches / inner ankles? I keep messing up my ankles, and part of it is walking wrong because I don't have the energy to engage the muscles in my feet/legs right to like, avoid injury, and part of it is I just need new shoes inserts. But i wear slippers a lot and they do not have arch support and it hurts. PT to help with this also but Where Is It

Family can't seem to get dish soap I can use, so I've just been having to avoid washing anything by hand, or being in the general kitchen area while anyone uses the stuff, which has led to more of my dishes sitting out, and more conflict over dishes. Lovely.

How hard is it for parents to learn they have to respect boundaries? Very hard, apparently. And you're supposed to just sort of remind people, and explain, over and over and over but like at this point my self worth is actually pretty good and the lifetime of proof that they do not want to listen? That's making me want to stop trying. Like, if you're not going to respect my boundaries I'm just not going to involve you in my life. I'm not talking to my dad right now because of this. Maybe I'll decide to lay things out to him, again and again and again again, maybe not. And I'm comfortable saying that's on him.

How to drink water

Am I dehydrated or are my hands just completely callous now. My fingertips have such hard skin. Why? It's uncomfortable. This is part of why I've been biting them.

Also testosterone. Been having a lot of trouble doing my shots, because anxiety and physical freakouts, but also not feeling super urgent about it. Which I'm realizing may be a sign i need to look at the effects so far and the possible effects of continuing, and see what they make me feel. It's possible I'm where I want to be as far as T, and don't really want to stay on it. A big thing for me is a deeper voice, so it seems time to take a look at whether I like my voice where it is or want to see if it'll drop any more. Etc etc

Miss my lil sisters

Saw a lot of cool rocks today. Huge (like hand sized) ammonite for $28. May go back and buy one because. Wow.

Want to plant food plants

Also my natives. Whole garden plot standing empty with a bunch of stuff waiting in nursery pots, needing to go in the ground. Because I can't get out of bed. Love that. Stuff is dying out there, I'm dying in here, there's a poetry to it and I do not want to romanticize suffering so I will say this: I brought a Bucket full of moss home a month ago and planted it and now go outside sometimes to drench my moss and it is very rewarding because the stuff is just so green. Incredible. When the rest of my plants are finally in the ground, that feeling will only intensify. But, for now, the moss is very nice.

Made a glow in the dark bead lizard from memory during therapy yesterday, and I love him. Also, still struggling with bringing up autism and psychosis topics with my therapist. Still very worried about. Things. Would like to get a new person? But sometimes she is helpful? And we have a routine. It's very hard to break the routine. Maybe I can set some time aside during the summer, to figure out what to do there.

Term ends in a couple weeks. The task of catching up, of passing, seems impossible. I really need to pass my courses. I'm on academic warning, because my GPA is lower than it should be, and if I can pass all of my classes this term I can get off academic warning but otherwise I'm not sure what will happen to my financial aid.

My phone is playing the same 50-100 songs on shuffle and I don't even particularly like most of them and it is very strange

Got my face wipes! Hooray, i can wash my face again

Been eating too much sugar in general. It's making my joints hurt more, and the nausea

Pet a dog the other day. I miss that. It would be really nice to have a dog in the house again. The exuberance, the cuddles, the tail wagging, the walks... I'd really like that. Maybe once I'm out in my room, tanks and catio built and everyone is situated, I'll look into getting a dog instead of a cat next. Was planning on holding off in case I'm not physically able to take them out on walks and such, but I've been pretty successful at doing this job, and I think that my main hurdle for walking really is motivation. Dog walking is a strong motivator for me. Best to start by fostering, or just do Wag, for a while though. I'm feeling overwhelmed with my current responsibilities, and here I am talking about getting a dog. Good job, me

How do you get wax off of somewhat water soluble rocks? My housemate broke my lava lamp on some of my rock collection and I am not sure how to get some of them clean without damage.

I am...pretty sure there are collared doves nesting over my room but it seems they're less common around here than I thought? But they are..pretty distinctive. Like if I'm wrong, what are those birds. Some very distinctly colored feral pigeons? Who are nesting here, in a tree, without their flock, and who happen to have pretty much the exact same pattern?

Probably should go to the dollar store and get some bins for organizing

Been wanting to keep a bin by the door and stock it with stim/fidget stuff people can just .have ..like extras of some of my favorites and other things i can get ahold of, to offer to my friends who haven't really had the chance to explore the world of stim toys

Hands are really just not doing great the last several weeks. Arthritis type pain cropping up more and more in all the little joints, making it hurt more to write, type, or just use them for whatever. Coordination isn't great because of that distraction, and because my hands/arms are slow to respond and kinda weak. Most people would say I'm not using them enough but I've been doing 15ish hours of manual labor per week, so maybe it's the other direction? More water would help. If only it wasn't so heavy.

I haven't taken a single shower since I started my job. Which was March 29th. That's not great.

Practiced parallel parking today. 10/10 still very bad at it.

Having anxiety that my friends think I'm lying about things, faking, and are watching me to see if I'll slip up. So that sucks. Can either talk about that directly or indirectly, or just shut up about those things until I can get my brain under control again. I'm not sure right now if the reassurance would work as a reality check or make me believe it more, right now, so might hold off on the talking bit for a little while.

Saw, smelled, picked a couple pretty roses. Good times

At this point I'm just trying to list all my thoughts so that maybe I'll be able to sleep and not worry I'll forget

My mom has put her spider plant on the deck, and it has maybe five living leaves. I have no idea how she killed such a well established spider plant, the last time I saw it it was so happy. Did she stick it in a corner and forget to water it? Whatever happened, it is now in the Plant ER, so hopefully I'll be able to...help get it on the up and up again

Leo is such a pretty noodle. He's so pretty. He's posing. Hi, baby boy.

Oh, he saw me moving around and decided to come say hi. Sorry little man, i did not mean to disturb you. Please resume lounging. I can't bring you out right now, I'm trying to sleep.

Also, terrariums. Water features. Need to ask. Someone. The one who was making that super cool garter snake enclosure and blogging the progress? With the lazy river and pool? About maintenance on that kind of setup. My milk snake really enjoys water, and I'd love to put a water feature in his tank. But I'm unclear on how to keep it clean, or honestly where to start. Don't want any huge falls or anything, though it actually may not make the humidity too high if I did maybe a small drip wall into the pool? That seems like something he would enjoy, and a good way to support different types of plants. But like, that's the thing, it's bioactive and I haven't done that before and no amount of research is ever enough.

Oh, Shogun has a dirt hat. How cute. I love when they do that

See, this is the thing. My snakes make me so happy. All three of them are actually hanging out where I can see them from my bed right now, and it's really nice. I want their lives to be the best possible, and I think I have the resources to do that. Which is so exciting. Now if only my brain and body would cooperate. It would hurt quite a lot to have to re-home any of them, but the most important thing is their health and quality of life, you know? If I can't get my act together somewhat, it may be that one or all of them would be better off with another keeper. I don't know. It's just, i talk about all these tank ideas and all this husbandry standards stuff but how much of it actually gets applied to my own animals whose lives are in my hands? How well am I caring for them, really?

Oh!!! My red thread! I thought that was gone forever.

Anyway, please do not worry. My snakes are healthy. I pay attention, and watch for signs of illness, and they're okay. There will always be places to improve, and the water is a big one, but most of the time i change their water out frequently, I'm just worried because of bad depression and fatigue times, you know? I'm working on making the most self sustaining systems i can, in part so that I am sure they'll be okay if I mess up sometimes. Just saying this because I hope you guys don't feel like you need to worry about the welfare of my pets. They're okay, i just always want better for them, is all.

Anyway, the sun is coming up and I should probably go to sleep. So uh, thanks for reading, if you read all of this randomness, and if anyone has thoughts or advice on anything in this post, i would welcome it! Good night!

[s-creations]

Return the Flames - Chapter 7

All at Dead Bird Studios knew of Amos' (The  Conductor's) ability. How the owl could suddenly erupt into flames if  angered enough. When the studio first opened, Dominic (DJ Grooves) was  told that Amos had his ability under control. Nothing to worry about. No  possible loss of anything from an open flame.

A few years later however, and that control seems to have lessened to a dangerous degree.

It should have just been a simple, week long drive to fix the problem. It really should have been.

Dominic should have asked a lot more questions and should have been prepared for a twist ending.

_________________

Fandom: A Hat in Time     Rating: General Audience     Relationships/Pairings: The ConductorXDJ Grooves   Warnings: Eventual depictions of violence, slow burn relationship, named characters, attempt of an accent, being hunted down, a race against time (sort of).

One good thing to hold onto, during this troubling time, was that both directors had their wallets. Even after being flung around in or flung out of the crashing car. They were able to purchase the needed items and rent a car from the larger section of the town. Back on the road within two hours. 

 “I’ll be honest, I don’t think I’m up for driving all day.” Dominic remarked, a yawn escaping him once completing that sentence. 

 “Do ya need me ta take over in a few?” asked Amos.

 “If you’re up to it. But I have a feeling we're both in need of an early night.” 

 “Do ya think that’s a smart idea?”

 “We can’t not sleep Amos.”

 “But we just got away from our new, unwanted stalkers.”

 “I think they’ll also need time to lick their wounds. As well as try to figure out which way we might be going next before getting to our final destination. At the moment, we have the upper hand.”

 “Ya seem ta know a lot about this.”

 “I’m just using rational thinking. Now, you get some sleep. I’ll wake you in a few to decide if we need to stop or not.”

 “Dominic…”

 “I’m alright,” the penguin gave a gentle smile, “I’m not dealing with an ‘illness’ that could possibly... Just sleep Amos.”

 The owl didn’t have enough energy to put up a fight, finding himself curling in his seat and falling asleep. His head resting against the window. His ears twitched feeling something run through his feathers. But he didn’t let it bother him, sleep claiming him quickly. When he woke again, it was Dominic gently shaking his shoulder. The sun was just beginning to set. The car was parked outside of a motel. The penguin already holding a key for one of the rooms. 

 “...I thought ya were gonna wake me when we were gonna switch.” Amos muttered.

 “You know that was wishful thinking that you would be okay to drive. Come on.” 

 They shuffled into the room and claimed their own bed. It was a simple room, with only the basic needs and nothing added in the way of decor. Both directors just happy that it was actually clean. As they laid there that familiar awkwardness settled in between them once again. 

 Normally, Amos would have claimed space in the ice filled tub. Letting himself embrace the cold to keep the flames at bay. Now, however, he didn’t feel the fire attempting to release itself. Amos didn’t need the ice nor did he want to sleep, too uncomfortable to relax. So, here he was. Sitting across from an exhausted looking penguin that went from being a rival to someone Amos needed to rely on to survive.

 “So…” Amos hated how quiet it was. Not even the neighbors were making any sounds. 

 “We’ll need to find an ATM tomorrow,” Dominic answered, “Keep using money to keep our trail as cold as possible.”

 “Won’t usin’ the machine call attention to us?”

 “I really hope not. But we’ll need to take the risk in order to make sure we have enough.”

 “Fair point… How much do we have now?”

 Dominic pulled his wallet out. “I have...32 dollars. You?”

 “Even 40…” Amos pulled the phone’s directory towards him, giving it a glance before grabbing the phone. “Ya aren’t allergic to anything, right?”

 “Right.”

 “I’m in the mood for pizza.”

 “...You know what, sure. That sounds good.” 

 “What do ya want.”

 “Anchovies.”

 Amos visibly blanched at that answer. "Of course.”

 “Oh, and what are you going to have, Mr. Connoisseur.” 

 “...Pineapple and ham.”

 Letting out a laugh, Dominic shook his head. “Well then. Aren’t we just two special cases.”

 “Hush. Ya want a drink.”

 “Yes, please. Do you think they have bread sticks?”

 “Hold yer horses!” Amos laughed weakly, “How much money do ya think we have?”

 “Enough for bread sticks.”

 Amos fully laughed at that, Dominic joining in with his own chuckles. “Fine, we can get yer peckin’ bread sticks. Ya needy bird.”

 “Just for that, I’m not sharing.” The penguin playfully huffed. He grabbed the remote, turning on the television and started flipping through the channels. 

 Amos merely rolled his eyes as he ordered. As they waited, they found a channel playing classic movies, each taking turns telling small stories from their childhood. The rest of the evening was spent reminiscing on their personal favorite movies and shows. Lazily eating away at their carb heavy meal. It was rolling close to midnight when Amos passed out. 

 Even with how exhausted he felt, stomach full and feeling warm, Dominic couldn’t follow the owl’s example. His mind was still buzzing with the thoughts and fears that had combined from the beginning of this trip. He honestly felt as if he was living in one of his movies. Except with a lot less music, which was discouraging. Someone, a government agency apparently, wanted Amos gone. Like, completely gone. Because he was apparently ‘dangerous’. Became of some ability that Amos never asked to have. 

 Attempting to get comfortable, Dominic rolled onto his side facing Amos. Without the constant pile of ice that hid him, Dominic was able to get a better look at the passed out owl. Which was honestly amazing with how much Amos had slept that day. 

 He had kicked the sheet and comforter away. Creating a sort of half nest of fabric around him. Amos himself was curled into a ball, arms covering his face. His top leg occasionally twitches in his sleep. A soft ‘thump’ was heard from time to time, Dominic realizing it was Amos’ tail moving. The penguin could only hope that the other director’s sleep was peaceful. 

Dominic let out a slow sigh as he watched Amos sleep. This trip was supposed to be easy. A way to help Amos relax and not have to stress so much over what was happening to him. Now, they had an unwanted parasite following them around as a constant reminder of Amos’ affliction. And it angered Dominic. He was stressed, Amos was stressed, and this was a situation neither of them saw arising. They needed a break. A vacation away from their ‘vacation’. Just time to sit back and breathe. 

 He wasn’t sure when he started to drift off, his mind was still racing with how to make this better. But as the clock hit midnight, Dominic fell asleep. The answer he was looking for appeared a few days later.

 “Amos, look!”

 The owl was pulled from his thoughts as Dominic’s excited call. “Hmm, what?”

 “We’re coming up on a fair!”

 Amos frowned and turned his attention back out the window. Sure enough, there were signs lining along the side of the road. A large structure seen off in the distance. 

 “And? What do ya want ta do about that?”

 “Aren’t you curious? A small town fair, it could be fun!”

 “I- what? Did ya forget, we’re kind of on the run?”

 “And we’ve been on the move for two days without incident. I’m stressed. You’re stressed. Let’s go enjoy ourselves!”

 “Are ya crazy?”

 “When was the last time you went to something like this?”

 Amos squirmed in his seat. “Never.”

 “What?”

 “Never been ta one. Ma didn’t have the money and now I don’t have the time.”

 “Well, now we’re making time.” Dominic answered simply as he pulled into the field that was functioning as the parking lot. 

 “Are ya serious? You’ve lost it! We’ll stick out like a sore thumb here!”

 “In the middle of absolute nowhere, who’s going to care?”

 “As a Moon Penguin and a deformed owl, two species of birds that don’t live anywhere near here? Yes, people are going to care!” Amos sank further into his seat as they parked. “Dominic!”

 “Come on Darling, I want to have a day to look back on this crazy trip and enjoy something about it. And not just think about the chaos that was brought from this.”

 “The pizza last night wasn't enough?” The side look with the raised brow was enough of a ‘No.’ that Amos fell quiet. He remained quiet and allowed himself to be pulled from the car. Ears flat as they joined the cue to purchase tickets, eventually joining the fair crowd. 

 It was loud. Children screaming with glee as they rushed from attraction to attraction, parents frantically following. Mechanical noises from the nearby rides and vendors created a cacophony of bangs, whistles, and screeching metal. Beings of different sizes and species shouting at each other trying to be heard over the noise. The smell in the air was a mix of grease and sugar.

 “What do you want to do first?” The penguin looked around.

 “Ya pulled be in here.” Amos growled, ears still down in disagreement. 

 “Conductor, Darling, this is for us to both enjoy! And you’ve never been to one of these, so you need to get the full experience. Meaning, you need to pick what we do first.” 

 “What I need is for us ta get movin’.”

 “Let’s start with the food then.”

 “Are ya even listenin’ ta me?” Amos snapped as Dominic merely walked into the crowd. Following without much choice and not wanting to be left behind, Amos huffed as he started after the penguin. 

 It was as a plate of fried dough topped with powdered sugar was pushed into his hands did Amos really start to question what was happening. While the penguin was known as the more social director out of the two, this still seemed a little out of character. Dominic wasn’t one to push problems away. And they were in the middle of a rather large problem. So why would he very blatantly act as if they were on some sort of actual vacation?

 Lost to his confusion, Amos didn’t put up protest as he was pulled along. Dominic more than happy to take the lead through the different fair activities. Seeming to hit every one of his favorite spots that brought up a different childhood memory. 

 They were always doing something. Eating, taking in the sights, on a ride, conversing. Amos even forgetting a few times that they were supposed to be on the run. That his clock might be counting down to his final breath. 

 Then, it hit him. As they were exiting the ‘haunted house’, laughing hard at the terrible acting and Dominic started in on another story, that Amos realized he was relaxing. Even more so, he felt...happy. Nothing like when he was caring for his family or winning another award. It was as if he was content with just being himself for a while. A feeling Amos couldn’t remember having for a long time, if ever. 

 All because Dominic had demanded that they stop.

 The penguin was unaware of the look of absolute adoration the owl held for him as they entered into the gaming area. 

 “Do you feel skilled enough to take these on?”

 Amos was pulled from his stupor when Dominic gestured to the line of booths holding numerous carnival games.  “Nah, I know better. I’ve heard how these games are rigged ta make ya lose.”

 “Oh, such an owl of little faith.”

 Amos raised his brow as Dominic made his way towards the nearest booth. Giving a shrug, the owl merely followed, joining the other as the penguin paid to play. The booth had it’s back wall filled with small, inflated balloons. The attendant handed over a bundle of five darts before standing to the side, hiding among the plushies that lined the side. 

 “Are ya tring’ ta prove somethin’?”

 “Possibly. Now hush and watch.”

 Letting out a snort, Amos leaned against the booth to watch the display. Holding one of the five given darts, Dominic cautiously took aim. The owl was planning on making some smart comment when the first dart was let loose. Fully expecting for it to be ‘a swing and a miss’. Only to have a resounding ‘Pop!’ as the dart hit it’s intended target. 

 “Ooo, one of five. Amazin’.” Amos recovered quickly, smirking seeing Dominic’s face go sour.

 “Just keep quiet.”

 He would never admit it, but Amos was impressed. Even more so when Dominic actually won two more rounds. 

 “Wonderfully done sir!” The booth runner said with a wide smile on his face. “Feeling lucky?”

 “Absolutely Darling.”

 “If you win one more round,  I’ll let you pick one prize from the very top row. The best of the best I have to offer.”

 “Well, how could I refuse such a challenge. I’ll happily accept.”

 “Okay, now yer gonna lose it.” Amos remarked. 

 “Would you just let me enjoy myself.” 

 “Fine, don’t grumble to me when ya lose.” The owl stumbled slightly when Dominic hip bumped him. “Watch it.”

 “You watch it.” Dominic countered before getting back to the task at hand. It seemed even the small crowd of people couldn’t distract the penguin as he held another clean sweep. 

 “Very impressive!” The booth attended called out, starting out the round of applause from the crowd. “Wonderful show, good show! Go ahead and claim your prize.”

 “You impressed?” Dominic leaned over to Amos as he gestured to the stuffed plushie he wanted. 

 “That ya were able to cheat the already cheatin’ system? Sure, if it make ya feel better.” Replied Amos with a smirk. 

 “I’ll still count it as a victory then. Here.”

 The owl was surprised when the won plushie was trusted into his hands. It was a star shaped pillow. The fabric was fuzzy, Amos running his hand along it, the texture soft. Realizing it felt similar to Dominic’s feathers. The design of said fabric was that of space. Inky black with swirls of pink, purple, and blue creating a galaxy. Spots of white designed to be the stars dotting the sky. 

 “Sorry, does it hit kind of close? We can exchange it.” 

 Amos realized he’d remained shocked and silent, hand resting on the pillow. “Ah, no, it’s fine. I want ta keep it. Thank ya…”

 “No one’s given me anything before.”

 Why was his heart beating so fast?

 Dominic smiled (which did not help Amos’ already frantically beating heart) and led the other away from the booth. “It’s a sort of some unspoken law that you need to leave the fair with at least one tacky item.”

 “It’s not tacky.” Amos quickly defended, startling the penguin. 

 “...I’m happy you like it.”

 “So...now what do we do?”

 “We have one more task to complete before we can leave.” 

 “Alright. Ya lead the way then.”

 With the plush tucked into the crook of his arm, Amos helped in carrying the feast of food Dominic started buying. They departed the fairgrounds proper, arms filled with food, as the sun began to set. Dominic led the way up a nearby hill and only stopped when they reached the very top. The penguin set up the food in a sort of circle, all within reach for both birds to enjoy. 

 The sun had almost disappeared behind the horizon when they finally finished eating. Amos lying on his back, stomach full with the plush resting on his chest. Dominic was next to him, eyes scanning the sky. 

 “Shouldn’t we be leavin’?” The owl asked.

 “We well. We’re just waiting for the final event.”

 “Havin’ us gain 10 pounds wasn’t the final thin’ ta check off?”

 Dominic laughed. “No. This was just a last hurrah of fair food until next year. But...it’s probably dark enough for it to start.”

 “It?”

 “The show, Darling.”

 Amos’ question fell away as a familiar sound filled the sky before a firework went off. Painting the sky and ground a vibrant red. Now, Amos had seen fireworks before. But only on set. As props for his latest movie he would have been working on. Watching them without having to set it up, or worry about something going wrong, it was far more enjoyable. Amos even sat up as he became further engrossed with the show. 

 He felt Dominic shift next to him, sitting up as well, the penguin shuffling closer. Amos didn’t argue as he was gently pulled to lean against the other. An arm casually wrapping around Amos’ waist comfortably. 

 Dominic smiled seeing Amos’ tail swaying, ruffling the grass it was resting on.

 It was worth delaying their travels for this moment of peace.

 “Thanks Dominic…”

 “...You’re welcome Sweetheart.”

[dontcare77ghj]

Only Human

Sam x reader x Steve x Bucky

The Avengers had seen a lot of weird things. Aliens, Tony committing to a monogamous relationship, Gods and a lot more, but the weirdest thing they’d seen yet was Sam dating you, Bucky and Steve. 

It wasn’t weird because of how many were in the relationship it was because of the species difference between the three of you. In your relationship, Sam was the only human. He liked to say he was the only normal one but he really was the only human in your relationship. 

To be fair, Steve and Bucky had once been human but you had never been human. You were born several centuries ago and had been born a phoenix. When you were 564 you met Steve and Bucky. They had been turned into vampires about six centuries ago and the three of you were excited to meet more immortals.

For a hundred years the three of you travelled and lived together. The three of you knew everything about each other and couldn’t imagine being happier than you were with each other. 

That was until you met Howard Stark. He was the first person, other than each other, you’d admitted your true nature’s to. The four of you became close friends and stayed that way even after he met his wife and eventually had a son. You and the boys became the godparents to the young Stark and looked out for him, especially when Hydra murdered his parents. 

It was a few years after Tony became Iron Man and the four of joined Fury’s Super-Secret Boy Band, when you met your fourth. Sam Wilson had joined a couple years after the New York incident and a few months after meeting the four of you went on your first date. 

Two years later the four of you were still happily together. The only problem between the four of you was when it was made clear three of you weren’t human and freaked the one human out.

It had been a long week. You, Sam and Tony had all been forced into a weeklong mission and had only been allowed one call home three days in. It had been a grueling week and the three of you couldn’t wait to get back home. 

“You know what I’m in the need of right now?” Sam asked as the three of you sat on the jet. 

“A shower.” Tony said, not looking up from his tablet. Reaching over you smacked Tony on the arm. “Ow.” He complained, looking up and rubbing his arm. 

“Don’t be rude.” You said, raising an eyebrow at him as if daring him to say anything else. 

“Thank you, angel.” Sam said, leaning over and kissing you. “What I was going to say before Tony was so rude, was I could for a stiff drink."

“See that,” Tony started, snapping his fingers. “Is why you’re my favorite of your little foursome.” He added with a smirk. 

“Rude. I helped raise you Stark.” You grumbled, narrowing your eyes at him. 

“That’s because you’re ancient.” Tony said, earning himself another whack from you. “What’s with all this violence?”

“You’re a rude bastard.” Sam said simply as you moved over to Sam and sat on his lap. “Don’t you know you’re never supposed to bring up a ladies age? Besides, my girl is eternally gorgeous.” He added, resting his head in the crook of your neck. 

“You’re so sweet, Sammie. Tony maybe you should listen to Sam more, you might learn a thing or two on how to treat a lady.” You said, kissing Sam’s cheek. Tony opened his mouth to respond but didn’t get the chance as the automated voice announced you had arrived back at base. 

“Oh thank Thor.” You groaned, standing so Sam could. “I want to sleep for a century.” You said as Sam wrapped an arm around your waist. 

“Wait, can you actually do that?” Sam asked, raising an eyebrow at you. “Have you ever actually slept for a century?”

“No, I’ve never slept for a century, honey.” You said with a gentle smile. “Bucky slept for six months after his arm but the best I’ve done is a week."

“Everyone can black out for a week.” Tony said, coming up behind the two of you. “It’s not that hard.” You and Sam rolled your eyes at the man as you entered the elevator and made your way up to your floor. 

“Steve? Buck? Guess who’s back.” Sam said as you entered the floor. “Anybody home?” He asked, and dropping his bag by the door as you stripped of your boots. 

“We’re here.” Steve said, walking towards you two with a large grin. “Welcome home.” He greeted, pulling Sam into a hug, kissing him, and then repeating the actions with you. 

“It’s good to be home.” You murmured, relaxing in his grip. “Is that blood on your lips?” You asked after he kissed you. 

“A little.” He said, flushing slightly. “Me and Buck got hungry.” He told you both as he led the pair of you into the kitchen. 

“Are you telling me I just tasted blood?” Sam questioned, looking slightly disgusted. “I need to brush my teeth.” He groaned. 

“Why do you need to brush your teeth?” Bucky asked, turning away from the sink. Sam turned pale at the sight of your boyfriend and you scrunched your nose at him. 

“You’re nearly a thousand years old, Buck, how are you still as messy as a newborn?” You questioned, raising an eyebrow at the brunette. 

Bucky turned sheepish as you mentioned his feeding habits. It was true that Bucky was a messy feeder, he always had been, and it was true that his current appearance supported your statement. Blood drenched the lower half of Bucky’s face and the top of his shirt, his fingers also covered in the red substance. 

“Blood’s a messy substance.” He said, wiping his face with his sleeve. “Still tastes good.”

“Guys what’s rule about blood?” Sam groaned, turning his face away from Bucky. “No blood around the humans.” He said without waiting for an answer. 

“Sorry, Sam. I forgot how squeamish you are.” Bucky chuckled, turning away from him. 

“I’m not squeamish, it’s just you don’t normally see people covered in blood with fangs protruding from their mouths.” Sam said as you moved over to Bucky and kissed him. 

“This is nothing. We’ve fucked with the two of them covered in blood and me in ash.” You told the bird. “Now, Buck why don’t you go clean up and we’ll make some food?”

“Sounds good.” Bucky said, kissing you before moving to the bathroom. Sam sat at the island and turned to face the two of you. 

“You do know I’m not kissing either of you until you brush your teeth, right?”

You were a very forgetful person. Had been for 900 years. Steve and Bucky used to joke it was as if you burnt a tiny bit of your brain away when you died but they’d stopped when they saw how worried the thought made you. 

You forgot simple things like the day, the month, important events and other small things that many others could forget. But sometimes, sometimes you forgot very important things like burning days. 

Sometimes when you were stressed or were experiencing a lot of inner turmoil your shift would be late. When your shift was late you barely ever noticed. If you couldn’t remember the date, why would you notice your shift was late?

It had been a regular day when it happened. All your boys were busy and doing things out of the tower and you had woken up late that day. You were in the shower when it began. 

The pain was immense and it came on faster than you could comprehend. One minute you’re washing your hair the next your entire body was alight and you fell to the tiled floor, dead. 

Non-Reader POV

Steve and Sam had left early to go for a run. They'd spent hours running their regular course and it was only the 7th lap, well Sam's 7th anyway, they'd decided to head back to the tower. 

"I see I've finished just in time." Bucky said as he met the two in the elevator. He embraced the two in a way of greeting and then leaned against the wall. "Let me guess laps?" 

"Yeah. Remind me why I agree to run with a vampire?" Sam puffed, sitting on the floor.

"Because you love me." Steve said teasing the human man. "What have you been doing all morning?" Steve asked Bucky. 

"Training with Nat. I swear she might as well be a vampire, the woman wakes up at the crack of dawn." Bucky told the two. 

"I wonder if she'd think of that as a compliment or not." Sam mused as the elevator door opened. 

"Y/N's awake." Steve announced as they entered their floor. "The shower's running." He added. 

"I could go for a shower." Sam said with a grin and walked in the direction of the bathroom. Steve and Bucky shared a smirk and followed their boyfriend in the direction of their girlfriend. 

The door to the bathroom was open, steam trickling into the bedroom, and Sam led the three of them into the room. 

"Doll. We're back." Steve announced as they entered the tiled room. Sam pulled back the curtain and was momentarily confused to not see his girlfriend standing in front of him. 

It was only when Bucky let out a startled noise that Sam looked down and saw his girlfriend. Blood stained the floor, though he could see no wound, ash and charged skin clung to her. 

"Shit." Bucky exclaimed, reaching around Sam to turn the shower off. Kicking himself into action, Sam leaned down and grabbed Y/N's still from off the floor. 

Steve grabbed a towel and began to clean off the burnt skin and charred remainders. 

"Fuck! Is she dead? Where's the blood coming from?" Sam asked, trying to find a wound. 

"Sammie, breath." Bucky said sternly. "This happens every month. The bloods probably from a wound that happened when she fell that's already healed. You need to calm down, you know she dies every month."

"Yeah at the start of the month not near the end." Sam says before beginning to control his breathing. "I'm good. I'm cool." He said after a couple seconds. 

"Sam's right." Steve said, cleaning the woman's face of ash. "Y/N always burns at the start of the month." 

"Not always." Bucky disagreed. "When she's stressed it gets delayed." He reminded the blonde. Steve nodded at his words and then stood. 

"Alright then, let's bring her to the bedroom, get her dressed and wait for her to wake up." He said. Sam scooped the unconscious woman up and placed her on the bed. Bucky dressed Y/N in a pair of his boxers and one of Steve's shirts before laying down in bed with her. 

When Y/N awoke it was to Sam and Bucky arguing over something or other. When the three men noticed she was awake Sam immediately began lecturing her, to her amusement as well as Steve and Bucky's. 

"You three are going to make my hair grey." Sam complained, flopping on the bed. 

Reader POV

Ever since Tony was young, he'd found it amusing that the big, tough, vampire Steve could be weakened by a pencil. 

Of course he knew a stake would do a better job but when he was younger, all he had were pencils at his disposal and he thoroughly enjoyed stabbing lightly into Steve. 

The first time he'd ever done it, you and Bucky panicked until you realized it was none lethal and simply a suing to watch Steve complain about a child and his pencils. 

As you all aged, Tony could get his hands on real stakes but simply found more amusing to stick a pencil into Steve's hand. Over time you and Bucky didn't get panicked ta the sight and simply smiled at your partner and godson. 

When Sam entered your relationship, well he hadn't ever seen it before and was rightfully terrified at the sight. If it were any other person freaking out as he had, the three of you would've laughed your assets off, but it was Sam. 

Your Sam, who thought one of his partners was going to die. The three of you had to sit him down and thoroughly explain that it was just something Tony did when he was bored and that it wouldn't kill Steve. 

Over time, he'd calmed down at the sight but still panicked slightly when he saw it. 

The entirety of the team was sitting in the main common room. No one was really doing anything, mainly just doing trivial things to pass the time and no one was really paying attention to each other. Until, 

"Ow, Tony will you quit it?" Steve demanded. You lifted your head from Bucky's shoulder and gasped at sight of seven pencils stuck in Steve's arm. 

"Tony what the fuck?" You groaned, rolling your eyes at the Stark. 

"Why do you have seven pencils on you?" Bucky asked as if it were the most important thing in this scenario. 

"Jesus Christ, Tony. Get those out of him before it actually kills him." Sam gasped, eyes growing wide at the sight. 

"He's not dying." Tony said with a pout. "Besides I'm bored." 

"Stick a knife in a dummy then." Clint suggested, looking at Steve and Tony weirdly. 

"Or one in Steve. Don't want to accidentally kill the man." Natasha added with a small smile. 

"Anyway," Sam said, giving Natasha a look. "Take them out of his arm now." Sam said firmly, narrowing his at Tony. 

"Yes Sam." Tony muttered, pouting as he pulled pencils out of Steve's arm. "You're meaner than these three sometimes." 

"That's because I am sensible unlike these three. I swear you're going to give me a heart attack one day." Sam said, giving the three of you a look. 

You and Bucky shared a smirk as you both leaned over to kiss his cheeks. 

"You love us, Sammie." You said as Sam's cheeks darkened. 

"Yeah. Yeah I do." He admitted, throwing his arms around yours and Bucky's shoulders. Steve eventually moved closer and joined hands with Sam. 

Though Sam was the only human in your little quad, and the three of you were going to turn his hair grey or give him a heart attack, the four of you were happy together. It didn't matter the species difference.

Taglist

@piper-koko-barnes-rogers @skeletoresinthebasement @hopingforbarnes @agent-barnes40 @rvgrsbrns @smilexcaptainx

Show your support. Give it a like. Leave a comment. Share with your friends and reblog. Inbox/Message me any comments, ideas, pairings, if you would like to be added to a tag list or whatever you like.

Coming soon:

Natasha x reader x Sam x Steve x Bucky

Steve x reader x Thor

Pepper x reader x Tony

Natasha x reader x Peggy x Wanda

Bruce x reader x Thor

Bucky x reader x Steve x Peggy

Wanda x reader x Natasha

[itstheendofthegoddamnworld]

Fae Boyfriend x Human! Reader

I’m working on so many projects, but I’m hoping to get as many done as possible before I go back to Uni. I enjoy this a lot (if you can’t tell) so fingers crossed! ENJOY!

Reader x Male Monster

These Violent Desires

For most of your life into your late teens, you always thought you had a follower. A follower or someone who watched over you like a guardian angel. Maybe it would’ve been seen as a bit odd or creepy to some, but to you, you thought not much of it; as if you had someone to protect you.

Your mother had told you otherwise. Many times, she had tried protecting you from the world, an overprotective mother, who too, grew up in a sheltered life trapped from the outside.

You see, all things lurked and hid in the darkest of places, coming out into the light as something or someone you could trust. A stranger who could manipulate you into thinking of them as nothing but harmful, until you find it too late and you’re whisked away from a life you once knew.

You had found it odd, and it applied mainly to humans that many would’ve been given the lesson of never talking to strangers. But this applied to other species too.

The fondest memories you had since you were a child were when you would go to visit your grandmother, in a secluded part of the north-east part of your small town. 

The mansion was large, with ten bedrooms, a flower-shaped rose-window in the top of the attic that you remember going up into to do tea parties. Each room was homely yet held possibly years of history.

The walls were old and decrepit: decades of some neglect could be seen from the amount of many trinkets and items your grandma Delores had collected, but it was homely, and always smelled like pine.

There was a simplicity to her large home, a rustic feel that you often didn’t get when at home, and something that always called for you to return more and more.

Your mother like her own mother grew up in a household that was filled with more paranoia than freedom. All for certain beliefs and unknown truths that your family held for years. You had been unfortunate to witness yourself many times before. 

Collecting your shoes to head to the back door to the garden, your grandma there either sewing or washing the dishes would stop all to come to you. It would follow with her putting charms in your pocket and an iron bracelet around your wrist before telling you time and time after again one simple rule:

’Do not go over the line.’

It was a simple rule that you couldn’t forget, yet something so normalised with the number of times you had gone to play in the garden. The line was something simple: as if it had been drawn in salt with small mushrooms growing on the exact spot, it took up half of the garden, reaching just under the branches of the trees.

You never misbehaved when it came to that rule (simply that you were too scared what would happen and how your mother and grandma would react), so you stuck to playing far away from it, ignoring it as best as you could as you got on with your play.

But still, in the back of your mind, you thought you were being watched through the bushes like there was a peeping neighbour watching in on you, but when you looked, you saw nothing.

The swaying of the trees danced through the wind, a call and whisper that danced through the air, and then you would be called in for lunch before you got too curious.

It continued and continued until you grew old of your dolls and small play, and you got older and found little time spent at your grandmas. She soon passed away when you were in your late teens, and that distant memory of playing there was something that plagued your mind; as if calling for you.

After a few years of cleaning out the old house, your mother told you that they were going to knock the entire building down, rebuild over it, and at that moment so rushed, you had told her your words of disagreeing, going as far to say that it would upset and disappoint your grandma.

’If you and I are not going to look after it, who will?’ your mother shared her disapproval with you that evening of the news.

Your answer back to her made her close her mouth in surprise. ‘Who said I wasn’t?’

After a lot of convincing, you persuaded your mother for you to keep the house and to maintain it for as long as possible. You had a simple part-time job, but you were certain that you could just keep the house at its bare minimal in tidiness.

You had returned to your grandma’s home when you were in your early 20s, returning to a place of both nostalgia and sentimental memories. There almost felt like a place of déjà vu.

You had parked your car and exited, walking alone and quietly to the front of the door, the leaves blowing past your shoes as you opened it with the key given. The door opened eerily and slowly, a hallway of utter darkness greeted you.

You stepped inside, involuntarily wiping the dirt from your shoes out of habit when there was no doormat, going to turn the light on. No luck. Damn, a reminder to buy new lightbulbs. You thought, shutting the door and walking further in and peering through the empty rooms.

For years of being cleared out, there was still that recurring smell of pine that faintly wafted through the air, but it made you think that it was possibly due to a window being open. It seemed true when you saw the large cobwebs in the corners of the dark rooms.

It was an odd feeling returning, a feeling of forlorn fell over you like a curtain. You were sure that there was some despair that was making you feel this way: the feeling that all would go through when it came to those to remember those lost.

You stepped through every room, even the rooms upstairs, memories flooding your mind as you silently walked along like a forgotten ghost. The smell of the earth, the laughter shared in these rooms. The flower-shaped rose window in the attic. All from a childhood long lost. You reminisced.

You walked yourself to the kitchen, looking out on the overgrown garden; a wilderness that awaited you. With the key in hand, you knew there would be little waiting for you, say perhaps some forgotten gardening tools or a neglected bike with its safety wheels left on.

You twisted the key in and soon found yourself entering into a void you thought you could recall. It was as the barrier between the mortal realm had been brought down; creating a euphoric and unearthly feeling in the air, twisting it to just feel oddly strange if you hadn’t noticed deeply.

You stepped out, the trees warped into creatures and shadows you didn’t know nor recognise, encasing you in as you looked around. Even the birds sang a tune much more unknown; as if all reality had melted into the wonderland you were standing in now.

The line that was in the middle of the garden, was still there, with more mushrooms and flowers that had grown so that it had now been a line made from flowers. 

There soon suddenly came a found of sweetness that filled the air, a sound of music that fills your ears to not exactly know where it was coming from.

It was all so peaceful you felt, walking closer to the line, a concerned voice of Grandma Delores warning you. ‘Don’t go over the line, remember? They certainly will not be as kind to you as you are to them.’

You never wanted to question what she meant by them, for most of the things your mother fed you as your grandmother being half-mad had been supplanted into your head since young. You, however, had your question answered when a dip in the trees and bushes brought your attention, and when you squinted your eyes from afar, you could just about see the figure standing not so hidden in view.

Your heart dropped a few metres down as if you had jumped from a cliff, a rush of adrenaline came to you as you were questioning whether what you were seeing was true or false.

The figure grew bigger into your view as whoever it was, stepped out further into the clearing. You would’ve begun shouting for them to get out of the garden for trespassing; perhaps even one of the young boys trying to get his ball back by crawling under a broken fence?

But this was no neighbour nor boy, no, what stood a few metres by the trees was that of a young man, tall and willowy, you would’ve believed if you had blinked, he would’ve disappeared - for his sudden appearance was something that surprised you.

He was ethereal and celestial; a man who even looked and stood there in a way that didn’t look like someone from your world. He had hair straight and long, black as a coal pit, but made his skin look paler and porcelain than your childhood dolls. He was dressed in garbs that were rich in deep autumnal colours, and what contrasted the clothes of his rich-looking clothes were his eyes.

His eyes are full of aeons of wisdom, the colour of nothing you had ever seen from others; the colour of alexandrite. His face was sharp and lean; with high cheekbones and a heavenly look.

Albeit there was a strange man in your grandma’s garden, you couldn’t deny he was very handsome; an attractiveness that you didn’t see from other men.

You stared at him quizzically, unknown exactly what to say. “Hello?” You called, your voice floating gently through the air with a force more suit for divine reality.

He stared with his majestic eyes, a mysterious smile appearing on his face. “I’m glad to see you again.”

“I’m sorry sir?” You called to the stranger. “How did you find a way into my garden?”

The dark-haired male stepped out close, his long flowy dark cloak making him look as if he was levitating without having to walk, gliding closer with steps you wished he would’ve stopped in taking.

He chuckled melodically, a sound similar to wind chimes; so soft and deep that it rumbled through you and shot right through your soul. “You don’t know my dear? Hmm, that is a shame. I would’ve thought a smart little thing like you would’ve known not to speak to people like me.”

The man was soon standing just opposite you, the line keeping him from crossing it to come over, as he stood a few metres back from it, looking at you with those enchanting haunting purple eyes.

“People like you?” You questioned hesitantly, looking him up and down. You had been told countless times by your mother and paranoid grandma over not talking to strangers when you were young, but this was now when you were an adult, and you had never met this man before.

You stared at him, trying to see what was really peculiar with him, and why he was giving you such odd vibes; none that would raise flags as of yet. The more you stared, the more you thought that you could perhaps even look right into the being of himself. You couldn’t even get that with him.

The man smiled to you, keeping an oddly calm composure. “When this house was built, many had come to see it truly for itself, to see the new souls living just on the outskirts of the woods here.” He gestured with a pale hand behind him. “It was only when more, shall we say… unexpected guests started coming over more and more often to this lovely home. That was when the first owner built this ring, the line that had kept whatever out there from coming in.”

You squinted at his words, trying to take them in. “You know of this garden?”

“Why yes, each individual habitant knows of every little soul who comes living there, even I.” The stranger spoke, a harsh frown fell over his face quickly as an immediate thought floated to his mind. 

“When news came over what had happened to Delores, the owner’s sweet little girl, why, every creature big and small mourned for her loss."

Your hands grew clammy in that brief moment he had said that, and a wave of the need to faint washed over you, trying to keep yourself upright. “How do you know my grandmother?” Your words were slow and cautious, downright afraid of what would come out next from the man in front of you.

The elegant man took another step just outside the line keeping him from entering, and you only just took note of the high pointy ears that were protruding out from the side of his head. The cogs inside your head were only just beginning to turn.

“Why, when little Delores had started growing more curious of the outside world and she stepped out, every creature was interested in her, and it had been her father who had come up with the genius plan of creating this line, drawing the bad things away and to keep her safe. It had been done so for as long as the winds continued to blow and the sun continued to shine. And still, this line had helped ones like you from crossing over into the threshold of this land.”

You had been thinking back to the English lit lessons from high school, to what all had been told about during plays and stories of what you believed weren’t true. It couldn’t be– it just couldn’t. Grandma was mad, but never… never did she say anything to me about the land of the fey living just outside of her home.

You took a cautionary step back, now making sure to not take your eyes off of the man you believed could only be a fey. “You… you know me?” You tried to pick the right words to say to him, hearing of how you had to be smart around one of his kind.

He kept his fixed expression on you, tempting in ways as if he was trying to drown you in the alexandrite of his gaze. “I’ve seen you since you were a youngling, always too curious for your own good. It was always something that brought me coming back to you.”

You unintentionally gulped. “You wanted to see me? Even when I didn’t know who you were, or what you were?”

“Precisely.” The man smiled broadly. “And yet, this from a sly mistake your grandmother made, and this fairy line would be brandished as a punishment for all that came wandering back.”

“You clearly know more than I? What happened to her?”

“Let’s just say…. a fey unlike I wasn’t as kind to her as I to you.”

That could explain why grandma Delores was filled with such paranoia. In your short lifetime, you had never told that your grandma had been possibly attacked from a young age; not even mom had told you anything about it and you knew how protective she was of you too. 

All because she had potentially stepped out of line. You had been sheltered all your life from answers, and you were unsure whether to believe the fey right in front of you. You did know faes could tell the truth - the amount to it you were uncertain of, or whether they could twist some of it.

You brought your gaze to the dark-haired fae once again. “A so-called fae who has known me for all my life, yet I do not know you.” You bit your own lip momentarily, uncertain whether to pursue. “Is there a name I can call you?”

His eyes twinkled in contrast to the little sunlight coming in through the trees, a soft glow coming to his skin that couldn’t have been coming from the sun.

“You may call me Erolith. And you, my dear?”

You gave him your nickname given to you since your younger days.

Erolith bowed his head in respect. “I shall be seeing more of you I assume my delight? Until then.” And with a swish of his heavy cape, the fey in front of you had slunk back into the woods, disappearing quickly before you could even think twice.

Curious, cautious, wary… words you couldn’t describe how to feel that day when you thought you had been lied to or been fed the untold truth. All because your grandmother had thrown caution to the wind that she had made you stick to being showered with overwhelming amounts of protection.

You hadn’t told your mother that day of going to the house, telling her you had been there and out in a matter of seconds - a lie you knew she wouldn’t think much too.

You returned during the weeks of the cooler season, sometimes there for hours on end to just bring in things to clean out the rooms and to leave as soon as possible.

You had found yourself in the darkness of the attic, sitting cross-legged against the wall as you read beneath the flower-shaped rose window. It brought an immense amount of memories to you to remember, but you enjoyed staying here in the quietness of the house, away from the world.

You read books and reread them over and over again, this time trying to familiarise yourself with some classic plays and novels during your late teens. This time, you had Romeo and Juliet in your hands.

These violent delights have violent ends. At first, it seemed vague to you during high school, but now, seemed to make a lot of sense.

You closed the part you had been on, gazing forth from the window as you stared on into your garden, certain you would see the fey again.

Erolith hadn’t returned in the few times you had come back, not at first, but you were sure he was watching from a distance. You weren’t bothered by it by much, sticking to sorting out the house, and soon it could be someone else’s problem.

You sighed, rubbing your eyes from lack of sleepless nights when your eyes focused on the certain silhouette of a figure emerging from the foliage.

You had dropped your book quickly, heading down to the garden to see him.

He was found standing right in front of the fairy line, closer to it than the first time he had come forth to you, standing there in the opening as if not bothered if another would see him there.

“Erolith…” his name was odd on your tongue, a name you found was still delightful and sweet of sound to taste. “I didn’t think you’d come back.”

He had turned to you with a gaze so familiar with eyes of calmness. “You didn’t think I would come back to see you, my dear?”

Damn him and his beautiful looks. You thought, walking to him but not standing as close to him. “You wanted to come back here?” You asked.

“Careful now my dear, you mean to say wished.” His tone darkened for a moment, your heart thumping in your chest, ready to implode.

You reiterated. “You wished to come back here? Why?”

“Because of you.” Erolith coolly responded, taking note of how far off you were conversing with him. “You stand so far off as if waiting to run off the moment something seems off.” invited the fey, “come closer to me. I won’t bite as you think I will.”

You wavered. “I’m fine here, thank— I appreciate it though.”

Erolith obliged, and the two of you just spoke about anything that he would answer that wasn’t cryptic. When he isn’t telling you things that sound like riddles, you grow mildly frustrated; thinking about exactly everything he said and the meanings behind every word.

“My grandmother once told me there is always something to be afraid of, that the world is awaiting things bad for me that hide with smiling faces.” You begun, eyeing the fae with a quick sharp look.

Erolith chuckled an airy laugh, mirthless. “Well, she is not wrong there.” And when you looked to him to clarify, did he continue. “All the worst things come to snatch those innocent enough. The sweet naïve child, the blushing maid. They’re all for taking when it comes to most faes?”

“And what about you? Do you follow those rules?” Your words twisted to add him into the mix, your eyes staring him down. He didn’t look in shock nor surprise by your words. And either he was trying to tell the truth or was struggling to lie, he was a good actor.

“I’m not like most faes my dear.”

You didn’t know whether to believe him, but there was something that you could find beneath his words that were hiding. Something hidden that was begging for you to trust him. In your mind, it seemed weird, but you couldn’t deny maybe you could perhaps fight fire with fire and go with your mind than your heart.

“I trust you then.”

His broke into a broad signature smile, spread over his pale face with relief. “I’m glad.”

The next few days you brought things from home to set up camp to a sleepover for a few nights, maybe thinking that not having to drive over constantly would save you gas. It was more in a case to familiarise yourself with the old house; trying your best to not seem scared when you sleep in a dusty sleeping bag in the living room, staring up at the ceiling the entire night.

The days you didn’t sit in the attic, but in the garden, reading or humming softly or even napping, but all just to wait for your friend. When he did arrive, it surprised you into thinking he must’ve sensed you there, but deciding not to question it.

At first, you sat far as possible away from him, watching from a safe distance and continued your conversations with him. It was only when on one day that you sat a few metres from the fairy line, picking growing flowers to create links from scratch.

Erolith didn’t say anything to that, copying you and sitting in the grass, continuing to speak with you as you exchanged small daisies to each other with some effort.

On the fifth day of doing so, you had decided to question where he stood when it came to deciding to keep coming back to you or to even holding conversations with a mortal like you.

“Sometimes I think you just come back here because you’re bored.” You spoke up, not meeting your eyes as you continued fixing the daisy chain in your fingers, “I suppose I can admit I was nervous around you.”

“You were?” Intrigued was the only word you could think of that made you think of Erolith. “And what would you say now? Still horrified at the sight of me?”

You met his gaze that split second, and immediately wished you could look away. He was already staring straight back at you, waiting, with a look you didn’t want to decipher. You gulped, your words dry in your throat.

“No– no I wouldn’t say so anymore.”

Abruptly he was stood before you, standing just inches away from the line as he stared down upon you. “Test this theory out then my dear. Come please– over to me.”

Your mind raced but your body was already programming yourself to slowly and steadily stand to your feet, neglecting the flower chain as you stepped over it.

Inching and inching closer, you thought back to your grandmother and what she would think. Mainly stupid and perhaps gullible in believing him. But from what you could tell of Erolith, he was funny, smart, and intellect, but she would’ve said it was his way of drawing you in closer.

Like drawing a moth to a flame. You breathed, soon standing just before him. He was a few inches taller than you, you only reaching his collarbones, and having to peer up into his beautiful eyes. The fairy line was touching your feet, begging you not to overdo it.

Erolith smiled shyly, reaching a hand for you. “Please, I want to touch you.”

These violent delights have violent ends. You reached for him, and tentatively, you put your hand into his. Warm and soft you didn’t expect that from him, but you were more than expecting the fae to have really smooth skin compared to yours.

Erolith hummed in approval. “That’s it– just like that.” He softly spoke, like talking to a wounded animal with no indications of harming it. You felt flushed under his gaze, blushing as you didn’t break eye contact. “That wasn’t so bad, was it?”

You shook your head as you pulled away, quicker than you could expect. Withdrawing brought a coolness to come back to your skin as if you had been brought back into your own world and body.

You stared at him with awe and wonder, thinking to yourself as to what you had done. “I wonder how Dolores would’ve reacted had she of seen you now.” Grinned the fae. “She wouldn’t have been most pleased.”

You shook your head, thinking that for a split moment, you could hear the familiar song and mirthless chimes coming from the distance, shaking your head to dismiss your head with such thoughts.

This continued and continued, days and days on end as you got closer and closer to Erolith, the barrier-breaking between the two of you. Slowly and with what you thought could be trusted, he broke your walls and allowed you to be more open to him, asking more questions and being open to answering ones he had for you, touching him and even going as far as to read with him.

You grew more appreciative of him, his time he spent with you as you the nagging feeling in the back of your head grew less and less; telling you it was better to have a friend around than none at all.

You were sat reading silently to yourself, leaning into his back as he sat facing away from you on the grass. Back to back, you held the book with one hand, your hand reaching over to his side over the line to hold his, feeling his warm fingers trace and squeeze and hold you back with much attention and adoration you had ever felt in your life.

“I will have to go soon, my dear. The evening is nigh and you still haven’t eaten. We wouldn’t want to ruin your evening, would we?” Erolith had brought your attention back to reality, as you shut your book with a quiet sigh.

“I’m not hungry.” You said, turning your head back to him as he grinned. “And besides, I can spend more time with you.”

“Wouldn’t you want to share the company with another instead of I?” Erolith suggested softly. “Have you no worrying mother, nor troubled friends that would need to get in contact with you?”

You thought to your mother, whom you had fallen out of talking with over an argument. She had believed you were spending too much time at the house and away from home; as if the house was corrupting you like grandma Delores had been.

As for friends, you fell out of conversion with old ones from high school. You didn’t need them, you had Erolith now… but did he want to be friends with you still?”

“I— they don’t matter right now. Don’t you want to spend time with me?” You pouted, looking downcast as you stood to your feet.

You weren’t expecting two warm hands to come around your face, pulling your attention to flicker up to meet his soft and genuine eyes. “I enjoy every day with you, my dear. More so than anyone I’ve known compared to a beat of every millennium.”

You paused in a beat, before speaking what anyone sane would’ve called your mad for thinking. You shut your eyes as you went to wrap your arms around the fae’s waist, effectively stepping over the fairy line that was keeping you safe for twenty-three years of your life.

Erolith gasped softly into your touch as you felt him hug you back for what you wanted in forever, slowly coming to terms as to what you had just done.

“The line… you stepped over the line.” His voice a mere state of shock.

You were standing in fae territory now, and now your life was in the hands of the fae you had come to enjoy spending time with. Erolith grabbed at your shoulders, pulling you back to your senses as you stared dazed at him.

You managed to get “get back over” from him as you felt him trying to push you back over to your side, but you tried your best planting your feet firmly into the dirt. “I don’t want to.”

Erolith huffed, surprised as you were with your statement. “Faes less kind than me will come when they sense you on our side. They will be here in a matter of seconds, claiming you for themselves and making you become their personal slave.”

You breathed, planting your fingers spread over his chest, leaning up to him. “If there is one person I would want to be claimed by, it would be by you.” You caught him off guard for sure. 

“Please, my life is a living hell, I find little love nor freedom here.”

“And you won’t over here if you don’t go back. Please, I beg of you, I will not take you as a slave and I never wanted to.” He said your name, adamant and serious in making sure you were safe. That was all you needed to know in believing that the fae did care for you.

You smiled sadly, still trying to get him to agree. “I don’t care. I like you Erolith, I will admit that. I enjoy spending time with you, whether you like me or not.” You may of seen insane in anyone’s eyes, but not to him. He knew of your pain, your silent suffering you had to face for all your life.

Erolith embraced you carefully, sweetly as if you were made of glass than human flesh. He was treating you like a delicate jewel, making sure to keep you from breaking. “I wouldn’t keep you as a slave, that was never my intention. You have my word. If you go with this, there’s no certainty you will be able to pass the threshold back into your world.”

The swaying of trees brought your attention past his shoulders, but he pulled his head to block the view behind him. In front of you, Erolith’s eyes were completely blown wide with wanton and adoration.

You smiled, saying two words that brought him to believe his words and set out to make you happy. Two words that made him see that you were completely trusting him and confident in what you wanted. 

“I know.”

It was enough to make him sweep you off your feet and press his lips to yours feverishly, and you felt yourself float above the clouds, higher than any God or kingdom could keep you from falling or staying still.

You wrapped your arms around his neck as you sighed blissfully into him, your bodies flush to each other.

The book you had been reading had been neglected in the empty garden, forgotten for aeons as the wind blew gently through the trees. For seasons would come but the sun would continue to rise.

The page left on the final page as it fluttered shut on the final words: 

     “A glooming peace this morning with it brings.

The sun, for sorrow, will not show his head.

      Go hence, to have more talk of these sad things.

Some shall be pardoned, and some punishèd.

      For never was a story of more woe

Than this of Juliet and her Romeo.”

[racingtoaredlight]

RTARL’s 2020 NFL Season Week 14 Extravapalooza

The Week 14 slate of games is straight doo-doo until the AFC North rescues us in primetime. As a result of this, I found it pretty difficult to get up for this week’s Extravapalooza. I know what you’re thinking: I’m a professional being paid ludicrous sums of money to show up on the weekend and give it everything I’ve got. But, I’m only human. My assistant puts my pants on me one leg at a time, just like everyone else. Frankly, I think this lackluster effort falls more on the coaching staff than it does on me. 

My picks are in BOLD, and the lines come to us courtesy of our friends at Vegas Insider. I use the “VI Consensus” line, which is the line that occurs most frequently across Vegas Insider’s list of sportsbooks. Your sportsbook of choice may offer a different number, and if you’d like my opinion on said number A) you are insane, and B) leave a comment below and I’ll try to answer at some point before things kickoff today.

EARLY GAMES

Houston Texans (-1.5) at Chicago Bears

Hey, did you know that the Bears traded up in the draft to take Mitchell Trubisky over DeShaun Watson? It’s true! Today, it’ll look like it was the right move. LOL, not really. But, I’m putting my faith in the ability of the Bears defense to bottle Watson up just enough to allow Mitchell a brief afternoon of sweet, sweet glory.

Dallas Cowboys (-3) at Cincinnati Bengals

OH BOY, ANDY DALTON REVENGE GAME!! This game could’ve been a fun time with Dak Prescott and Joe Burrow calling the signals for their respective squads, but sadly what we have in reality is a hideous slopfest that only the most degenerate among us would dare gaze upon.

Kansas City Chiefs (-7.5) at Miami Dolphins

I think the Dolphins defense can do a reasonably good job holding K.C. down, relatively speaking. The problem is that I’m not sure their Tua-led offense can keep pace. They’re still adjusting to life with Tua as their triggerman, and losing their best RB, Myles Gaskin, to the COVID list is a tough blow.

Arizona Cardinals (-2.5) at New York Giants

The Giants have won 4 in a row, while the Cards have dropped 3 in a row and 4 of their last 5. These twin developments are most unexpected. I just can’t bring myself to pick against my beloved Kyler Murray in this one, even though he’s been scuffling and the Giants made Russell Damn Wilson look like crud just last week. Daniel Jones is expected to be back in the saddle for the Giants, which provides another reason to pick New York that I’m choosing to ignore.

Minnesota Vikings at Tampa Bay Buccaneers (-7)

The Vikings are agents of pure chaos capable of both thrashing anyone and being thrashed by anyone, while the Bucs haven’t strung together two good halves in over a month. I truly have no idea what to expect from this game*. 

*Judging by my picks record, I have no idea what to expect from any game

Denver Broncos at Carolina Panthers (-3.5)

Here we have an incredibly resistible force meeting an exceptionally moveable object. The Broncos will be without their top 3 CBs, which is less than ideal. Carolina won’t have RB Christian McCaffery or WR DJ Moore, but I still like their odds of hitting a big play on offense and/or capitalizing on a Drew Lock mistake enough to pick them to win by more than a field goal.

Tennessee Titans (-7.5) at Jacksonville Jaguars

Derrick Henry is the jewel of my fantasy team, and since my playoffs begin this week I’m putting the idea of him cranking out a hilarious yardage total while grinding out the clock out into the universe. 

LATE GAMES 

Indianapolis Colts (-3) at Las Vegas Raiders

The most non-descript game imaginable.

New York Jets at Seattle Seahawks (-15)

The Seahawks need a get-right game after losing to the Giants last week, and lo and behold the Jets are coming to town. The only thing giving me pause here is the non-zero chance that Pete Carroll got sidetracked during the week and the team spent their preparation time learning the TRUTH about a totally different New York jet situation.

Green Bay Packers (-8) at Detroit Lions

Somebody on Twitter (possibly Jim Harbaugh Scramble?) pointed out how much the FOX cartoon graphic for Packers TE Robert Tonyan looks like White Michael Vick from the infamous “What If Michael Vick Were White?” story from a few years ago, and it cracked me up for a solid 10 minutes.

LOL

New Orleans Saints (-8) at Philadelphia Eagles

I’m morbidly fascinated by this game. Saints QB Taysom Hill has looked shockingly competent...when playing against the Atlanta Falcons. How will he do against a different, larger species of bird? I don’t know what to expect out of Eagles QB Jalen Hurts in his first start, but at the very least I think he’ll take off running to try and gain SOME yards if his first couple of reads are covered, as opposed to holding the ball and waiting to get creamed a la Carson Wentz. The Saints defense is a brutal first matchup for him, though.

Atlanta Falcons at Los Angeles Chargers (PK)

I’m following my “Don’t Pick the Falcons If Julio Jones Is Out” rule here. I have no idea if that rule has actually served me well whatsoever. 

Washington Football Team at San Francisco 49ers (-3)

As of this writing, I can’t find any solid info as to whether or not Football Team O-linemen Brandon Scherff, Morgan Moses, and David Sharpe are going to play. Even if they manage to get out there, they’re pretty banged up. The o-line injuries combined with the loss of studly RB Antonio Gibson has tamped my enthusiasm for Washington down considerably. 

SNF: Pittsburgh Steelers at Buffalo Bills (-2.5)

FIRE TOMLIN! Seriously though, this is Pittsburgh’s third game in 11 days, which is ridiculous. They’ll also be without CB Joe Haden, which will only tempt Josh Allen to chuck it up even more. Whether or not this is beneficial for the Bills depends on how you feel about Josh Allen, I suppose.

MNF: Baltimore Ravens (-3) at Cleveland Browns

The Browns and their fans are riding too high right now. The laws of the universe require them to be knocked down a peg or two, possibly due in large part to former Ohio State Buckeye JK Dobbins returning to Ohio and running roughshod over the home team.

Last Week’s Record: 8-6

Season Record: 82-91-6

[narelleart]

Cladistics vs “Fish”

I got an ask related to the cladistics thing that probably didn’t need this much detail, but I got excited to talk about this and whoops its a whole big explanation no one asked for. So rather than bombarding the asker with the whole deal here, I figured I’d publish this bit as its own post and just respond to their related question privately.

What I was trying to address with all this is a breakdown of how “fish” is not a valid taxonomic grouping - for it to be accurate, all vertebrates would have to be fish. I tend to just go with that because I think that’s pretty fun, but its probably more correct to say that they way we lump organisms into the group “fishes” is entirely artificial and does not reflect nature. See below for why!

------------------------------

So cladistics tries to chart evolutionary relationships by shared derived characteristics - unique traits in a group's evolutionary history that can be used to define where they have branched off. A grouping is only taxonomically valid according to cladistics if you pick a branching point and include every organism that would have shared some ancestor where that branch forms. You can't exclude any group that shares that ancestor. (Why birds are reptiles - see below.)

Here's a visual I threw together:

(I made this based on notes from an old class. Apparently the graphic that my notes come from was from “Pough et al. 2013.” May need to open it for best viewing.)

So the thing with "fishes" is that all vertebrates evolved from a common ancestor with what we would call a "fish." Cladistics only considers traits that newly evolve in a lineage to group organisms together, not how many traits are retained from ancestors - but a new trait can be the loss of an old one (why "snakes" fall within the broader group of "lizards" despite perhaps feeling more intuitively primitive - they lost their limbs in more recent evolutionary history).

This is the case with everything that is a vertebrate that we don't consider to be a "fish" - we lost the traits that allowed us to live in the water, which opened up a wider array of body shapes when limbs moved from something to fan around to move forward to something that needed to bear weight.

Up to this point things make sense, but might feel a bit arbitrary, right?

The real problem with "fish" is that, following cladistics, a coelacanth is more related to us than a tuna. And a tuna related more to us than a shark. And a shark more to us than a lamprey.

Let's revisit that graphic.

To really put things in perspective, its important to understand how time is displayed here. Time here travels from left to right, never in the vertical direction. Evolution doesn't stop, and we all evolved from the same original eukaryote, so everything alive today is just as "evolved" as everything else, even if genetic progress isn't apparent. "Living fossils" like horseshoe crabs are just as evolutionarily advanced as humans, they have just evolved differently than us. All currently living organisms’ lineages have spent the same amount of time evolving as every other one. Even though the “fishes” have earlier branches, this isn’t saying our ancestor is a shark, it’s saying what are known as sharks today most recently shared an ancestor with us a very very long time ago - a much longer time ago than our common ancestor with reptiles.

So we can rearrange this graphic like this and it will still be valid:

It looks messier, sure, but it is no less valid because there was no actual hierarchy to the organisms that gave it the previous order. Doing it that way just made it easy to add labels, and over-represented the importance of mammals.

So where does that leave all the "fish"?

They got scattered around the tree. Because they aren't actually very closely related - they share a life strategy that makes certain forms more advantageous, so to us, superficially, they seem very similar. Many traits have independently evolved in multiple lineages because the selection for them in aquatic environments is so strong (convergent evolution), which makes them seem even more similar. But they aren't actually strongly related to each other, which I’ve tried to distinguish in this version by giving each a distinct color group. Each lineage of “fishes” I have listed here has been evolving independently from one another for longer than mammals have even existed.

[Side note, they're so alien! So different from us! This is why fish are so cool!!!]

Calling lungfish, stingrays, and trout all “fish” but not using the same term for koalas and ostriches suggests those first three have a greater degree of similarity to one another than they do. Sure, superficially, they all live in the water and might have some other traits that are vaguely similar. But those traits aren’t exclusive to fish and aren’t inclusive of all “fish”.

Cetaceans are very “fish shaped” and live in water, but they are not fish. Neotenic salamanders live their entire lives in water and retain their gills, but are not fish. Sea snakes live in water and have scales but are not fish.

What makes a fish?

In my ichthyology course, I was taught that there are 5 traits that make an animal a fish, and that each one of them has exceptions:

Aquatic ....except there are fishes that can walk around on land, like mudskippers and walking catfish.

Free-Living ....except there are parasitic species that rely on hosts, such as male angler fish, sea lampreys, and the Candiru

Gill Breathing ....except there are fish that have rudimentary lungs, such as lungfish and walking catfish

Cold-blooded ....except tuna and some sharks are warm-blooded

Have fins, not pentadactyl limbs ....except coelacanths have pentadactyl lobe-fins

So our best definition of what makes a fish isn’t even valid because its full of holes from all the exceptions that exist in nature. The label “fish” ultimately falls to pieces no matter what angle you tackle it from. It is, truly, a superficial similarity that we base the designation on.

Does this invalidate the science of ichthyology, my personal love for “fishes,” or any level of the value of their study?

Nah. It all really doesn’t matter.

What we call the science has no bearing on the studies we do, which aren’t dictated by organisms being “fish” or not in modern science. We have much more specific taxonomic groupings we can use, and so many more species to compare to within them. Would it be more accurate to say I’m studying to become an “Actinopterygii Biologist”? Maybe, but that’s lame and discards the history of the profession.

“Fishes” are the most diverse group of vertebrates, yet they are incredibly understudied. There are so many fish out there for us to discover - and not just in the deep sea! We are still finding fish in shallow freshwater systems, easily accessible habitats. There aren’t enough people studying this massive group to scratch the surface of the knowledge we lack about them.

So who cares if we lump a sparse group of researchers tackling a vast array of organisms together under a label based on an outdated name? The proportion of people studying “fish” to the abundance of these organisms is ridiculous, especially compared to charismatic species like large mammals. So why not use the same term rather than try to divide up an already small group?

Actually, I think few use the label “Ichthyologist” nowadays, but I intend to. Whether a “fish” is a valid group or not, I became a scientist to study fishes. No other taxa were compelling enough for me to dedicate my life to science. I am not going to be just a biologist. I’m going to be an ichthyologist.

[nightmarenoise]

Just comparing two cartoons I love

I understand that nobody asked in any capacity, but here I go anyway:

It feels fair to compare Ducktales 2017 to Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2018), not only because they're only about a year apart and truly, what is a year, but also because they

1. Both use this style that looks like it jumped straight out of a comic book. Okay, it's mostly the solidly inked shadows, but it gives me, personally, comic-y vibes.

2. They have taken what's arguably the main characters (the triplets for DT, the Turtles for TMNT) and shaken the formula up a good bit. Were the triplets formerly indistinguishable and all had the exact same personality, interests and voice actor, they are now three entirely separate entities with different traits and appearances. And while the turtles had about one defining personality trait and looked basically the same, save for the color of their masks, Rise made them different species of turtle to justify giving them radically different designs and three-dimensional personalities. Both shows faced criticism for this decision from people who cannot deal with change. Despite this, in both cases, it just works and does so incredibly well.

3. The oldest bros wear red.

4. We have two middle bros associated with the color blue who are both voiced by Ben Schwartz.

5. Both shows have a focus on family, with Ducktales especially focusing on found family and Rise on brotherhood.

6. Anime references!

Ducktales has a larger cast overall, with a lot of different characters all interacting with each other and they all have the most pleasant voices I've ever heard in my entire life. It's all solidly animated, the style is consistent and the animation is fluid, the characters are diverse and they're all lovely in their own right, except for those who aren't. The writing is top notch. Everyone feels consistent despite the large cast and it's delightful to watch all those interesting people interact with each other in their own way. The show also handles its mystery elements and occasional action scenes incredibly well, building suspense and delivering laughs and gut punches without hesitation. They juggle different tones like a professional clown, except the true clown was us, the audience, all along, for ever having doubted them.

The overarching plot of Ducktales, for its first two seasons, was mostly to uncover the mystery of what had happened to the mother of the triplets and all that would entail. Mystery and mythical elements will likely continue to be afoot for season 3.

Rise works with less focal characters, we have the Turtles, Splinter and April as well as various bad guys, but more than makes up for it with a lot of animation. A lot a lot of animation and it's all high quality. There's usually so much going on on-screen that a watching it once isn't enough to catch it all. Despite that, it doesn't feel crowded or rushed. Lots of dynamic shots and incredibly-choreographed action scenes, but nothing the thoroughly solid writing has to hide behind. Even when the baddies aren't the main concern, they're still well-rounded, interesting characters with unique abilities and motivations. Although, most of the mutants are just really feral. Still a delightfully diverse cast.

The turtles on the other hand spent their first season trying to foil their various foes, from a yokai trying to mutate all of humanity, to his mutants, to dealing with random mythical stuff, to the nefarious Foot Clan trying to reassemble the Dark Armor in the shadows. It's generally a more action-driven show, but they still find the time for some heartfelt moments.

The triplets 2.0

Despite their conventiently color-coded caps, they were really mostly the same character possessing three different bodies at a time. Well, the times of eerie The Shining like-twins, except extended to triplets, are over!

We have Huey, the oldest brother, voiced by Danny Pudi. He's a gentle, intellectual soul who values red hats, science, scout badges and checklists. Huey is arguably the closest in characterization to the original triplets, with some additional neat freak sprinkled in for flavor. He tries to be the responsible older sibling and keep his brothers under control and out of trouble. He also seems to have the most fiery temper of the bunch and should clearly not be pressed to the breaking point. He's my personal favorite and I heard season 3 will bring more focus to him, which makes me elated to hear. 888/10.

Middle child Dewey, the blue one, voiced by Ben Schwartz, who will inevitably come for all the iconic blue characters. He's very clearly the middle one, because he craves attention and validation and occasionally dreams of being an only child. Dewey is the one who started the investigation into their mom's disappearance and kept it from his brothers, partially to save them from hurt, but also because he wanted to feel special. He's the most interested in going on adventures with their uncle, but can get reckless when doing so. He's a bit of a spotlight hog, who has his own talk show that nobody watches and sings his own theme song when he needs to get hyped up, or just to fill this silence. This may sound kind of negative, but rest assured, he's a good, sweet boy. The focal triplet for the first season. 500/10.

Louie, the evil triplet, a schemer and a conman. Voiced by Bobby Moynihan.  The youngest of the bunch. While they call him evil, he's really far too lazy to cause serious harm, except for when it's his laziness that's causing him to take dangerous shortcuts, oops. He dreams of making a fortune, but without having to work for it and preferably without any responsibility either, thank you. He also occasionally dreams of being a spoiled fat cat. Despite his chill demeanor, he can be a bit of a crybaby and those tears are only fake 50% of the time. I feel like he likes getting babied, but mainly because that means there's less work for him to do. Season 2, which focuses more on him, reveals that he's actually quite brilliant, capable of seeing all the angles and giving him some chessmaster-like qualities. He needs to learn to use those abilities for good. 665/10.

Hi, she's Webbie! The honorary triplet, who also got a massive makeover, from annoying token girl tagalong to socially awkward, adorkable action girl. Be careful who you call ugly in middle school, indeed. Like a more ferocious  Mabel Pines, she has a grappling hook and years of martial arts training under her belt. Webbie can absolutely decimate you, but won't, because she's a sweet girl. Voiced by Kate Micucci. She continues to like unicorns and the color pink, but assuredly in the most badass of ways. She helped Dewey with his quest to uncover the mystery of his missing mom, but works well with all of the triplets, with Huey taking her under his wing a bit and Louie trying to get her to chill out more. Webbie is a sweetheart and I would die for her, were it not completely unnecessary, since she's more than capable of taking care of herself. ∞/10.

A lot of the supporting cast also saw updates and changes, for instance Gyro being a genius without social skills and Fenton being an adorkable scientist, but again, they work really well. They're interesting new takes on beloved characters. Even the new additions to the cast are great. In short, I love me some birds and am excited for season 3, Disney, get your scheduling together.

The Turtles 2.14.2 - I upgraded my upgrade in the middle of the upgrade

Also, these guys have seen so many different iterations in their, what, 30+ years of existence. As someone with no prior attachment to the turtle brand, I don't have a lot to say here. Leo's not the leader in this one and Raph has more personality than being angry at Leo for being the leader. Donnie is not just a random nerd spouting technobabble and Mikey has more depth than yelling the catchphrase every now and again. Apparently, this made people upset. I don't know how to help you with that.  The middle brothers exude some high chaotic energy and should not be left unsupervised, but the oldest and youngest seem fairly stable.

Raphael, the red-bandana'd alligator snapping turtle is an imposing figure. He's the oldest and therefore team leader by default. Raph has no reason to be upset at Leo, so he isn't. Despite his ferocious appearance, he's a soft guy, who likes teddies and doting on his brothers, but fears puppets. He's a bit of a knucklehead, most of his plans involve smashing things with his tonfa and he may refer to himself in the third person in the heat of the moment, but he possesses emotional intelligence, is open about his feelings and looks after his brothers. He is big and and strong, but his heart is bigger and stronger. He especially loves small animals animals, who don't usually return his feelings. RIP in F. This responsible guy is voiced by Omar Benson Miller. 300/10, very soft. Somehow both the heart and the big guy of the group.

Donatello has been upgraded from second-to-youngest to second-to-oldest, not that it makes much of a difference. His color of choice is purple and he continues in the character's tradition of being a nerd, although this time, with self-confidence. Donnie is very sure of himself and his abilities. As a spiny soft-shell turtle, he's less sure of his shell, but that's okay, he's made robotic battle shells to make up for it and his bō is the mother of all multitools. This guy can build you a tank out of a buggie and upgrade your animatronic into something to give the FNAF franchise a run for its money. He's the smartest of the four and when not focused on his phone, very focused on the mission. Due to having to deal with his bros, he can be exasperated a lot. Thinks of himself as an emotionally unavailable bad boy, even though he's just really sensitive and wants his dad or someone parent-aged to tell him they're proud of him. Theater kid. 999/10, give the middle child a hug and some coffee, you can't tell me he has a healthy sleep cycle. This sarcastic nerd is brought to you by Josh Brener.

Leonardo, Ben Schwartz's second blue character (Sonic (2020) being the third under his belt) and also his second ninja after Randy Cunningham. He's not the leader. He's still a good character. Leo has approximately 800 charisma and unwavering faith in both, his family and himself. Mostly himself though. Like Louie, season 2 revealed that he is a master of prediction and playing people like the cheap kazoo you can't tell me he doesn't have to play Darude's Sandstorm on. He dabs, he boards, he will pun you to death and back and he has an Odachi that can cut through space. Leo likes hogging the spotlight when given the chance and wants to be showered with attention and praise. Having four kids really only means twice the middle child nonsense. Leo is a red-eared slider, the original species of the TMNT, as I've been told. He's also the best at being a ninja, but usually too lazy to really apply himself. He's younger than Donnie, but tumblr suggested to read the two as twins, since they're approximately the same age, which sheds a whole new light on their dynamic and frankly, makes way too much sense. 420/10, for our memelord Leonardo.

Michelangelo, the eternally youngest of the bunch. An artiste, who puts stickers on himself, tags the lair, has a spiritual connection to his skateboard and the color orange. Mikey loves all things arts and craft, but he also tries his hands at cooking. He idolizes famous TV chefs and can do pretty much anything out of and into pizza. He's funny, without being annoying, like I feel a lot of other iterations of this character are. It's an easy pitfall for comic relief guys, but this one is more than that. If that's an issue, feel free to leave my house. Mikey is genuinely sweet and happy, optimistic and soft, but also the one brother who knows when it's time to take off the gloves and just get straight to the point. He's open about and in touch with his feelings. He's just baby. Don't treat him as one though. A lot of promo stuff says Leo has taken him under his wing, but he's had more episodes together with Donnie. Not that I'm complaining, they work very well together. Mikey and Raph are both the emotional centers of the group. Does not mind being yeeted after retracting into his shell, as box turtles may do. (Disclaimer, do not yeet actual box turtles!) His weapon of choice is a Kusari-Fundo that can turn into a fire-demon and is about as unpredictable as he is. Likes to jump and bounce around. Probably does parkour. Voiced by Brandon Mychal Smith who is audibly having a blast. 500/10, just an all around Kusari-fun guy.

For last, but certainly not least, April O'Neil, my girl, who saw an upgrade from flip-flopping love interest who was vaguely ninja-ing, but mostly damsel in distress-ing, to all-around spunky powerhouse and by God, she is glowing. Rise has her more as a big sister figure to the turtles, and I will not be told otherwise. She is independent and don't need no man, mutant or no. She has her teleporting pet, her faith in herself, her pinpoint baseball hitting skills and the a complete and utter lack of fear. Despite being a weirdness magnet, April is perfectly comfortable. She would like to be able to keep a job, maybe, but she has loving friends who respect and love her. Surprisingly good a ninja, fearless and fun. Occasionally thinks about being popular at school, but it's really not a big concern, she's not gonna throw a tantrum over it or anything. April is very chill. Not likely to be damseled. More likely to run after the turtles and clean up their messes or save them and everyone involved is fine with that.

The late 10's are really coming in to show us how dynamic and well-written female characters that aren't just "strong", but three-dimensional and relatable are done, huh?

An iconic performance by Kat Graham and ∞/10 for being the honorary better ninja non-mutant non-turtle and best big sister.

Here we have it, two older properties, having new life breathed into them to make them fresh and enjoyable. Have a new spin put on them, to better fit in with our current world. You can feel the love oozing out of every frame. At the end of the day, of course, it all boils down to taste and whether or not you like something. I gave Ducktales 2017 a go because a lot of the staff from Gravity Falls went to work on it and if you don't know me, I love me some Gravity Falls. It's a good show and I enjoy it. I recently got into Rise and while I don't know much about the people working on it, it is also a greatly enjoyable show, easily on the same level as Ducktales, if not above, yet with far less people speaking about it. Which is frankly saddening. I can only recommend the two of them wholeheartedly. If you love animation, yourself and occasionally feeling things, these are for you!