#and I love seeing how many people still read them

[immafuneral]

I genuinely hope you don't mind me adding onto this post, but- On one hand, I really want to agree with this- I think it's so important to give people grace and the room and space to learn and grow, sometimes people aren't hateful, they're just uneducated and underexposed. Sometimes we ARE responsible for holding their hand through it and teaching them with kindness, patience and empathy. Do we owe it to them? No. But that's the only way that we're going to see positive change in people. No, it's not always going to work, it's not a guarantee, sometimes you ARE just wasting your energy on someone who will always choose hate and ignorance... But shame and rejection only pushes people further into stronger belief in the extremes they're being taught... Meaning to say, it goes both ways. On the other... I don't know man, I'm so tired. It's so hard to hold onto that belief when living in the US right now. It's so hard to tell myself that people need grace, they need help to improve, they need compassion- Proof that we aren't everything the truly hateful bigots say we are. I'm so angry, at the people who chose that fucking fascist as our president not out of hatred but out of ignorance, because that DOES make them just as bad. Their decisions have still lead to me living with the fear that I am going to be killed, alongside everyone I love... I think about how many of them might NOT have voted for him if they had someone in their life who was willing to empathize with and explain to them what they were actually choosing. When we treat it like- "Well they should have known!!- It should have been common sense!!!" Or "That's what we've been screaming about throughout the campaign!" Spreading that information is not the same as being with someone and walking through it on an individual, compassionate way. The same way your parents ask you things and you get frustrated at them because, why can't they just google it? They could google it, sure, and that might be a lot more convenient for you, because YOU'RE just going to google it.. But they're asking you because you're someone they trust and google is overwhelming to someone who isn't used to having this much information in their face, at their fingertips, all at once. They don't have the ability to discern reality from unreality on the internet. Why would the things they're reading, the news articles (propaganda) and posts they're seeing be untrue? But, unlike the Christian Missionaries, I live in a world where letting people outside of my bubble into my life is genuinely putting me at risk for being who I am- And I know that a lot of people feel the same right now. So where to we find the balance? How do we decide when it's safe, and when it's not safe? When do we have to decide that we do it anyway? Even if we know we're taking a risk?

So, you know how certain Christian missionaries are trained to act in a very obnoxious way, so that most people they preach to will reject them outright, so they feel like the world hates them for being Christian and they can only be friends with fellow Christians? You know that thing?

I think as activists, we sometimes need to stop and ask ourselves whether we're acting like those missionaries. I think this type of behavior is a little more ingrained into our society than some of us realize, and some of us have internalized it without realizing what it's actually meant to do.

[buttercupshands]

thought about this thing for a while

it was extremely interesting to just analyze myself and get like a tier list in my head

[ressjeon]

for the drabble event i wanted to ask if you could

jjk

eros + pragma

row 3+seat 1

chips + bottled water + slushie

i’m so excited and i can’t wait to see how you’ll write it,, i’ve never requested something before and youre one of my favorite authors <3

pairing: roommate!jungkook x fuckgirl!reader

summary: the normal way of trapping your adorable roommate in your allure has been leading to nowhere, prompting you to approach him in subtle ways until you become irresistible in his eyes.

genre/au: angst, smut, roommate!au, college!au

warnings/content: explicit sexual content, jealousy, free use?fingering, doggy, backshots, angry sex? humiliation cuz kookie's mean :(

a/n: it's been 3 years since you've requested this anon and for that i apologize. i hope you'll still manage to see/read this now though and thank you for requesting! i'm honoured to be one of your favourite authors <3

☞ part of @btsgoldnetwork’s two hearts, one love valentine’s day event in 2022 🎞💓

🍿 bangtan theatre presents: irresistible 🍿 purchases for movie tickets and snacks are now closed!

Jungkook’s confused when he gets a whiff of another sweet scent coming from across his room. For about two weeks now, he noticed his roommate lighting up scented candles and placing them around their shared apartment.

Which is pretty random because you never do things like this. 

He’s wondering what brought you to start using scented candles when you didn't have the slightest interest in it before. Jungkook tried giving you one as a welcome gift when you first became roommates but you never even touched it until these days.

“where did you buy this one?”

You're startled with your roommate's question. It’s the first conversation you have with him regarding your current obsession. He's never acknowledged it verbally although you remember him scrunching his nose when you wore your bold perfume once before going on a date.

“i’m not sure to be honest, it’s a gift”

It is; only one of the many that you received from your long string of admirers. They were hoping that you'll see them more often through these gifts after you expressed your “love” of scented candles.

When in fact, it’s for your gorgeous roommate. 

You’re aware of Jungkook’s fondness for smells and after the direct flirting on him didn't work, you resorted to this. Using those boys for your agenda didn't really impose any guilt within you. They're exactly the same type as you but thankfully, they're pussy whipped that it was so easy to weave them into your plans on getting your roommates attention.

After you realize your fondness and interest are turning into serious feelings for Jungkook, you've expressed your feelings to him as clearly as you could. However, you didn't know how to approach him after his subtle rejections on your usual method.

Your feelings for Jungkook genuinely bloomed that you've stopped bringing guys over even when he's not home. It's a basic rule to respect each other's boundaries; the both of you having an agreement where only one can bring someone over when the other is not home.

Sometimes, Jungkook catches the boys coming out from your room, nodding at them in greeting but then ignores you afterwards. You tried whisking it as him being awkward seeing some people knew knows. Many times, you've contemplated on breaching the subject but he's barely home anyway. When he does, you flirt with him to see if he still gets flustered. He does and when he's in a pleasant mood though, he greets you and you relish them because it's rare.

Just like his smiles.

Jungkook wants to ask who gave those gifts but he already knows. He didn’t need to see the fancy paper bags on the counter to guess where those candles came from. It's given by those boys you’ve been seeing lately, if it's from the same person or multiple people, he's not sure and he doesn't want to find out.

What he's sure of is your reputation. He's aware of you because your popularity even reaches to other universities nearby. You've built your reputation since the start of freshman year so he was a bit hesitant in accepting you as a roommate before.

Another thing he's aware of is that you never take boys seriously hence he’s been wary each time you flirt with him. It seems so natural to you while he gets flustered. You find his reactions amusing though, as if you can’t tell that you do have an effect on him more than you think you do.

"you look great today kookie"

"we should do a movie night!"

"jungkook you're so adorable"

All your attempts at luring him went into dust and you can't figure out why. He can tell from your face each time he doesn't respond to you and does feel bad but he had to. Like a typical scenario, Jungkook did develop feelings for you no matter how much he tried avoiding so. He went as far as focusing on things that hurt him to reduce whatever he feels for you but to no avail and it scared him. He didn’t want to be one of those guys that you drop after sleeping with them.

However, he’s been getting better than before, reaching as far as rejecting you directly.

"you really think i'd believe that you out of all people, like me" he points to himself exaggeratedly but that's not what concerns you.

It's his eyes that are full of loathing after hearing your confession. He just arrived from one of his late lectures to find you preparing dinner for the two of you with a big smile on your face. He didn't read too much into it because you could just be hungry. Although, he should've because your full confession was something that he didn't anticipate.

“what do you mean? come on kookie, why don’t you believe me?” your voice came out a bit whiny when you realized that he's dead serious.

"what? you think i'll give in quickly?"

Maybe it's his ego talking but seeing the uncertainty in your face boosts his confidence a bit. Jungkook doubts other guys were able to make you react this way. He's the first and he'll hold out as long as he can. You've been making it pretty difficult lately but he still can't trust you.

"that was never my intention. i genuinely like you, kook"

"no? didn't you wanna sleep with me? be honest" he barks, crossing his muscular arms across his chiseled chest, challenging you to deny it.

"i-i do but—" you admit, shying your eyes away from his intense gaze.

This confrontation was last on your bingo card for this month. You just wanted to try again, confessing your feelings like a normal person even though it's not something that you're used to. But here Jungkook is, breaking your heart into pieces like none of those ever mattered to him.

"let's just get this over with" he suddenly says after a few minutes of silence and you didn't even get to process what he's saying cause he's suddenly on you.

Jungkook closes in as he focuses on your lips. Your lips that he wanted to kiss since that morning he found you adorably tip-toeing in the hallways to not wake him up. He had back to back football practice back then along with deadlines that he was extra tired every night because of the lack of sleep.

You welcomed his lips with fervour, closing your eyes and clutching his wrist when he grabbed your jaw to tilt it, deepening the kiss. Believe it or not, you used to dream of this, going as far as imagining that it's Jungkook when you're kissing other guys.

His kisses are harsh, with lots of teeth clashing and he's biting your lower lip for you to grant him entrance in which you did. Jungkook just wants his mind to shut off, to drown in you for once without second guessing his moves and yours.

For all he knows, you could only be playing with him but Jungkook doesn't care about that now. It's funny because it was you who initially pursued him and this time it's him. Jungkook will be damned if he doesn't make sure that he'll be the best you'd ever had. Never mind that you've fucked many guys before; he doesn't even wanna think if you will still fuck other guys after he's done with you.

You've basically given Jungkook free reign, looking at him with glossy eyes as you kneel by the couch after he releases you. Looking at you now, you look behaved while waiting for him. Jungkook could walk away right now to end this, to get back at you real bad but it's too late.

He's held back for too long and he feels like he's going to explode. All his mind can think of is how he's finally got you where you wanted to be. Letting himself go just for tonight would solve something, he's hoping.

Whatever the consequences are after this.

Jungkook doesn't make a move as he undresses, his piercing gaze eyeing you while you're finishing up discarding your clothes. You gauge what he's thinking, only that his pupils have dilated as he scans your bare body.

"why kookie what's wrong? you don't want me to suck you off? come here" you call him invitingly, batting your lashes at him but unlike other boys, Jungkook remains unaffected.

Or maybe not.

"no, you don't deserve it. why would you be?" he goads you and you're left speechless as you stand back up, climbing on the couch in all fours to entice him. "because i like you?" your voice came out quietly, full of desperation, looking back to hopefully catch his eyes.

Jungkook only scoffs as a response, the heel of his large palm pressing the top of your ass to push your body down until you're fully lying on the couch.

"like me? ah yes. but you like many guys y/n, like them enough to fuck them right?" he replies with a menacing tone and once again, you're left trying to process what he means by his questions but that flutters away when the tips of fingers runs along your drenching slit.

He's teasing you of course, he already said you didn't deserve to suck his cock earlier so maybe he'll only give you his fingers. It doesn't matter; it's the furthest you've ever had with Jungkook intimately so you'll just accept whatever he gives you.

Jungkook's waiting until he hears any complaint from you but it's been more than a minute and you've remained except for the heavy breaths you let out the longer he keeps his ministrations on you. He enters one finger to test your tight walls but also to see what you're playing at.

Another finger after a while and you're getting impatient no matter how much you coach yourself that Jungkook's just taking his time with you. When he pushes in the third one, that's when your body jerks, pushing back against his hand.

"there you go. thought i'd have to wait longer" he snickers, increasing the speed of his fingers. "kook—" you whine, unable to hold back your moans anymore.

Then Jungkook stops you by removing his fingers all together.

"up" he instructs and despite your frustrations, you did raise your body, going back on your knees. You didn't want to turn back now just in case you annoy him, wiggling your ass to give him a sign that you're more than ready for his cock.

Jungkook planned to fuck you in the previous position but it's too intimate. Even when he can't see your face, you'd still be so close to his body and it'll crack his barriers. He'd love to fuck you while seeing your face but that would allow you to see how vulnerable he is around you.

"jungkook..please move" you immediately cry out once he pushed in because he stayed still. You're tempted to grind back, your sensitive walls have been clamping around his dick, adjusting to his size that made him grip on your hips tightly.

"who says you can demand anything from me? you're lucky i'm giving you what you want." he spits but he begins moving his hips, ruthless unlike you've imagined before.

Jungkook's wrong. Everything is the opposite of what you wanted. He's barely even touching you, hands never moving from your waist just to hold you steady. Your brain's clouded with the pleasure that he's giving so you focus on that instead; relishing the tightness of his hold depending on his mood.

"kookie—fuck" you scream out when he finally angles his hip, hitting that soft spot inside you that you couldn't help but reach back to grasp his hand. He swats it away and you whine out, he's clearly displeased but maybe this is a way for him to believe you.

Jungkook doesn't want any ounce of affection from you. He's supposed to be mad, well he is, fully enraged with his insecurity that he's never been good enough for you. Plus, he'd be lying to himself that he was never jealous with all those guys you brought over. It's the reason he never stays home long, to avoid seeing them with you but he still did.

He's liked you for months already, showing his affections by cooking you breakfast and doing most of the chores when you're out with your friends or at parties. He never complained even when you started flirting with him, dodging you as much as he could because you're doing it to toy with him.

"just take it will you? acting like you've never had cocks in you before..." he drawls as he speeds up, leaving you mewling with tears welling in your eyes at the wave of humiliation that crashes on you.

You're back to gripping the leather couch when his fingertips brushes your swollen clit, flicking the bud after and you almost came.

But you didn't. Jungkook made sure of that.

All night he repeats teasing and fucking you endlessly until your body convulses, only stopping and doing it again. For a moment, you almost forgot who you're fucking with the amount of stamina that he has. Although you did fuck many athletes before, Jungkook still surprised you with his self control.

"no more.." your voice is hoarse with all the nonstop screaming and thankfully Jungkook stops his ministrations. "n-no, no i wanna cum, please kookie~"

"mhmm..shit..okay"

He's not faring well either but you could barely tell when all you can hear are his deep guttural moans and the skin slapping echoing around. You're both very sweaty but Jungkook's large hands miraculously maintained their grip on your body. Eventually, you both reach your climaxes, having Jungkook pull out and finish on your back to your dismay.

"wanted..inside.." you mumble, nuzzling the couch's arm. You only hear a task from him before you feel a piece of clothing rubbing along your sweaty skin. You've closed your eyes at the comfort but tried opening them when he turned your body around.

Then the combination of the mind blowing orgasm and exhaustion knocked you off to sleep. 

You've woken up sore everywhere but it doesn't compare to the ache in your heart when you couldn't see Jungkook anywhere in the living room. You don't even wanna try to get up or call his name in case he's inside his bedroom. He's not but you'd like to hope because of last night.

He took care of you, providing you with your own blanket and pillows after cleaning you up. Thankfully, you had no early lectures today; you were pretty much spent so the energy for attending classes is at total zero.

Not going is a more tempting option for you though, the chance to see Jungkook is high with how involved he is on campus. He's quite popular as well but not on the same type as you which was how he possibly found out this much about your history. You've met other girls who've hooked up with him before, telling you how he's actually more on the subby side which further increases your interest on your roommate.

You blink, realizing you're smiling at the memory.

Reminiscing those memories before you fucked him won't help you at this point. Jungkook for sure hates you now because you proved him right, using your tactics on him so he'll sleep with you. Both you and him did make the decision yes but he probably agreed in order to stop you from pestering him further.

The wise move for you is to forget this ever happened and move out but you won't. You'll prove to Jungkook how serious you are on him no matter how long that may take. You can still fix this you believe; you're never gonna give up on him unless you hear that direct rejection from his pretty lips.

e/n: i haven't really written the loml for almost 2 years now so if it sounds or feels different then that's why 😂 i've been missing him a lot tho so here we are :D

[describingcolours]

A couple of people have reblogged this saying that its false equivalence or that the amount of effort nasa put into spacecraft is a little overkill for everyday objects.

That isnt the point. The point is that we know how to make things last through super harsh conditions. We know how to make things persevere. Read through the many other notes on this post and you'll see many people talking about fridges that their grandparents bought in the 60s that still work, or sewing machines over 100 years old that sew better than a modern one (i have a 1924 singer that needs a new treadle and works perfectly, but right to repair is a slightly different conversation).

And even if it was the point, why is it overkill to make everyday technology with the same effort and attention to detail as nasa would put in for example the jwst? Why should we settle for less?

Throughout human history, we've always put so much love and care into the things that matter and even the things that don't? Why is a microwave any different? Or a hoover? Or, if we want to be eco-friendly about it, the earth? The way we're getting through old shoes, phone batteries, etc is not sustainable.

This post got popular at a relevant time for me because a phone i had for 5 years had an update pushed through that purposefully bricked the battery. And google admitted as much. They offered a free battery replacement for all phones affected, but i expect this new battery to last all of one year. Google will have noticed that people with the pixel 4a weren't buying new phones, pushed this update with the excuse that it "stabilises the battery", offered the free battery replacement, so when this new battery no longer works people will remember the "brilliant customer service" and just buy the newest pixel.

I just hate that we're at a point where people will accept that things don't last and its through no fault of anyone's except time's. Things last. We just dont want them to anymore.

"well youve had it 6 years that's a good amount of time for that kind of thing to work"

"you should be grateful you got 3 years of use out of that thing, I'm lucky if mine last a year haha"

listen, in 1977 nasa launched the voyager spacecrafts to take advantage of a planetary alignment that takes place every 175 years. These 2 crafts were planned to flyby the outer planets of our solar system and gather data on them to send back to us. Voyager 2 launched first on the 20th of August despite its name because it was planned to reach our gas giants after its counterpart voyager 1, which launched a little later on the 5th of September.

The voyager mission was planned to end 12 years later in 1989. In that time, voyager 1 and 2 passed by Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, and Neptune. They discovered new moons, confirmed theories about Saturn's rings, found the first active volcanoes found outside the earth, and they take close-up images of planets only seen at that point from telescopes.

On the 25th of August 1989, voyager 2 encounters Neptune, the last planet in our solar system the voyagers will meet. And that was that. End of mission. Now obsolete.

~

Less than 1 year later on valentine's day in 1990 voyager 1 looked back on the planet that had built it and sent with it a world's worth of hopes and dreams and took a picture. We called it the solar system family portrait and in it, we see ourselves. The pale blue dot nestled in the darkness of space

And then commands were sent to shut down their cameras. Preserve fuel.

35 years after launch, in 2012 voyager 1 sent back to us data about interstellar space. The very first manmade object to enter it.

41 years after launch voyager 2 did the same. Still operational, still going. Still sending back to us invaluable data, teaching us about our own solar system and the suns influence in our local bubble of space.

They are expected to continue to operate until the year 2025 - almost 50 whole years after they were launched and 36 years after their mission was supposed to have ended.

48 years of harsh space travel, battered by solar winds, pulled by gravity but fast enough just to escape, pelted by who knows how much space dust and radiation.

And even after that, they still have a purpose. Each craft was given a golden record. A disc filled with human knowledge and knowledge of humans and the planet they live on. Greetings and well-wishes to any prospective extraterrestrial life that could potentially pick it up. Co-ordinates, an invite. Samples of our music, the things we love, sounds of the earth, a story of our world. The surf, the wind, birds and whales, images of a mother, our moon, a sunset. Long after the voyager spacecrafts go dark, probably long after we are gone, they will still be doing their job; educating a species about our very tiny corner of the galaxy.

They are nasa's longest-running operation.

And it was all done using 70s technology.

So excuse me if I want a phone that lasts more than 2 years or a vacuum cleaner that doesn't break down after 6, or god fucking forbid, a refrigerator that will keep my food cold my entire fucking lifetime.

[an-angel-so-called-satan]

2025 and I still laugh when someone complains that the author made a VADTD character dirty... And by this I mean that the author gives them problematic characteristics.. For example, Eckles, a guy who was chilling in his royal palace with his family until everything changed when the Eorka empire attacked...

To this day you can still read comments saying that if Penelope had been more empathetic and paid attention to him, he wouldn't have become like this or that without Laila's intervention, everything would have been fine... LOL

He is a victim of slavery with a lot of pain and post-traumatic stress, who clearly shows a resentment towards the empire, plus is canonically described as taciturn...

HOW THE HELL DO YOU THINK HE'S GOING TO RECOVER FROM THAT? With the power of love and friendship? With an epic tale of salvation and revenge?

... Yeah, it probably works in fanfics, but NO on VADTD. That's not how Gwon Gyeoeul's characters are.

Even in the same story, after the side stories, Penelope, who had a happy ending, still worried that someone would want to attack her family or that she would disappear from that world since she was a transmigrate. That's how PTSD works.

Eckles is Eckles precisely because of his painful past that shaped him into what he is in the future: someone with trauma who became obsessed with the one person he interacted with most often... and later an adrenaline junkie and mercenary lol

Derrick is Derrick for being an obtuse man who took refuge in his title of heir and in work from a young age, since he never healed the loss of his sister.

The funniest thing is that some people think the author was unfair to them and then, on the author's blog, you can see how she speaks affectionately of Eckles or Derrick lol

And all the other characters are like that because their cursed past made them distrustful, even cruel in some cases... or even with dark desires... And yes, I speak of dark desires because some turn a blind eye to the dark lock that certain characters have on their affection score and are visible in the manhwa. Each character has a twisted quality to a greater or lesser extent, a product of the author's decision, not necessarily influenced by Penelope or Laila, but by the author's taste and whim.

I mentioned it once and I do it again, while some believe that the author is making them dirty, what she actually does is pour honey on them... In a twisted way... I know, this is probably uncomfortable for someone who doesn't know the author's previous works, but I do...

And let me tell you that one of her first works was "미친 새끼 (crazy kid/bastard)". Do you know what it's about? According to the Naver reviews, because this book can't be found anymore, it's about a teenager who falls in love with his schoolmate and innocently fantasizes about her as his girlfriend, until one day by chance he starts spying on an apartment of lovers who sometimes have intimacy... Everything is more or less normal up to this point until the reviews say that there is a plot twist in the story:

The protagonist, after interacting with the female lover, realizes that she is actually kidnapped and is suffering from s*xual abuse. He then decides to help her escape, but at the climax of the story, while trying to free her and struggling with the kidnapper, he accidentally kills the victim and the kidnapper also dies in the event... Do you want to know how it ends? Traumatized by the event, he repeats the same patterns as the kidnapper and kidnaps his classmate and locks her in a place where no one can find them... THE END.

This peculiar story is just one of many stories that Gwon Gyeoeul has written with this theme of thriller and dark romance. And not to mention her works where the victim becomes the victimizer, because in almost all of them, her characters have a gray morality.

VADTD is by far a work with one of the few conclusive and happy endings in Gyeoeul's work history. So next time, don't tell me the author is dirtying the characters in VADTD, because by far, they are innocent next to other more twisted characters she has written.

[creatingblackcharacters]

Hey again, it's the whump asker. As a follow-up, yes, I have read that lesson, but I mostly got out of it just what not to do. I'm still not sure about the exact steps to take to subvert the stereotypes. I know you mentioned in the lesson that you can write violent scenes with Black characters (and actively avoiding doing so would be dehumanizing since violence is universal) but I'm still not sure exactly how to go about it.

Well, part of the reason I say what *not* to do is because that's a far easier list than telling you everything you can do 😅.

Also, there is something I say in all my lessons and I did say in this one in particular: watch Black media that contains the themes you want to explore, to see how to do it respectfully!

I recognize that that's not the easy answer you and many people may want. I do recognize that I frustrate a lot of people on here when my answer to them for this question is not "here's a list of all ways to not be racist", but "you'll have to learn what the stereotypes are, to then be able to practice spotting them, and by seeing that, you'll learn how to avoid writing them".

Those are the steps I have to offer! It really is just practicing media comprehension and analysis. You have not lived the Black experience, so that means you're gonna have to put in the extra work to practice. How can you avoid it in your writing if you don't know what it is, and cannot spot how subtly yet often it shows up? So try watching something you like, and see where the potential issues lay.

Unfortunately, there are as many examples of stereotypes vs subverting them as there are pieces of media with Black people in them. I could never (at least, not at the moment) give you a full list of every example. I'm sorry to disappoint you 😅. Tis the frustration of being Black and finding out they've found a new way to deliver an old insult every time you chance watching something.

@for-the-love-of-angst also offered a whump community that may be more helpful to you than I 🙏🏾

[refreshingly-original]

Okay, new idea. (This got bigger then I thought it would)

After surviving the Road, Lilia takes on an apprentice reader, who already knows tarot.

She thinks to test her skill and has her do a reading for her.

Her cards are clearly very cheap, misprinted (think image is wonky or partially missing) and of cats.

She thinks they’re a joke, a knock off to be sold for Halloween and says as such.

Reader pays it no mind, fully aware of Lilia’s view on the worlds take on witches, and continues with the reading.

Lilia decides to gift her a new deck, and they’re gorgeous, certainly not misprinted, but every time she see reader doing a reading for herself, or even Teen or Alice when they drop in for a visit, readers using her cat cards.

Lilia thinks she understands, slightly, why she uses them when she starts noticing the stray cats turning up at the back door and following reader around when they go out.

It doesn’t help that reader always toddles off when she sees a cat and goes to pat it. Lilia has lost her apprentice many times because of it and had to track them down.

Eventually, during dinner one night, where reader has a pregnant stray sleeping on her lap, Lilia asks why she still uses the cards.

The cards were a gag gift from her best friend who gave them to her for her sixteenth birthday. She got the cat ones because cats seem to flock to reader like she’s their queen.

Reader says that her friend had crossed out cups on a card and replaced it to say ‘Queen of Cats’.

They were the last gift she’d gonna from her best friend before she just gone. (Whether she moved for whatever reasons or died is up to you)

And that’s why she still uses them for readings for people she cares about. Cause they’re scuffed to hell and back, but they’re her most important belonging.

Lilia figures out that reader was in love with her best friend and lets it go after that.

But as time goes by, and readers gets closer with the coven and Lilia, she starts using the deck that Lilia gave her for readings for Alice and teen, sometimes even Jen, never Agatha though, and Lilia is glad to see that reader is moving on from the heartbreak, but still says nothing.

It’s not until a year or so has gone since she started using Lilia’s deck on the coven that Lilia sees her doing a reading for herself with the deck she gave her.

That night, she asks for a reading.

Lilia pulls The Lovers and that’s how she realises that she might be in love with the girl.

Reader on the other hand starts teasing her about having a special someone, not realising it’s her. She does so for days afterwards, mentioning it whenever Lilia’s gaze seems to linger a little too long on someone.

“Ohh is that them? Cute.”

“I will hit you.”

“No you won’t. You love me too much.”

“Insufferable girl.”

When they meet up with the coven for dinner night at Agatha’s, reader tells them.

By shouting it from the front door.

“Lilia has a crush on someone!”

Everyone joins in on the questioning and teasing, but Lilia doesn’t miss the look Agatha gives her before glancing at reader.

She knows she’s going to be cornered by the other witch at some point and does her best to not be alone to avoid that.

It doesn’t work.

Agatha convinces Teen to help her get her alone and Lilia falls for it because she has a soft spot for him.

“So-“

“Leave it Harkness.”

“You going to tell her?”

“I’m leaving.”

“I’m almost certain she feels the same for you.”

Lilia ignores it and rejoins the coven, but it lingers in the back of her mind.

A month later, Lilia does her own reading and curses up a storm when she pulls The Lovers again.

Reader peaks over her shoulder and laughs, wrapping her in a hug.

“Maybe you should just tell them.”

“I’m too old for this, baby.”

“Evidently not.”

“Ugh.”

That night, reader also pulls The Lovers and realises what’s happening. At least for her. She realise nothing about Lilia. Oblivious as she is.

Que her bailing to bunk on Alice’s couch that night because ‘how could she move on so fast’ from her first love.

Lilia doesn’t find reader in the morning and tries calling her but it goes ignored. It’s not until Alice rings her and tells her that she’s staying with her for a while that Lilia relaxes. Though she’s still confused about why she’s gone, so she looks through around her room, only to spot the spread on the table and of course comes to the conclusion it’s because reader figured out she has feelings for her.

She kind of goes numb for that day, only reading focusing on her emotions after she closes up the shop and kinds of breaks down a bit.

She doesn’t open the shop for the next few days, and only answers the phone because she thinks it might be reader.

It’s not. It’s Alice telling her that reader will be staying another night.

Then it’s Jen checking in, because Alice called her and told her that somethings wrong with Lilia.

But of course Alice helps reader through it, pointing out that it’s been years and that it’s okay to fall in love again. After about a week, Alice convinces her to go and talk with Lilia, even promising to be there with her for support.

Jen of course has no problem breaking in to Lilia’s home after a few days of Lilia just hanging up on her as soon as she realises it’s not Alice with an update on reader, to talk some sense into her.

It ends up with them drinking. Jen only has two, but Lilia ends up drunk, so Jen has to take care of her.

Jen doesn’t realise that she sleeps on the Murphy bed and puts her in readers little room. Jen sleeps on the sofa. Shes going to have words with Lilia about not having a better sofa in the morning.

The following morning is when Alice and reader turn up, surprised to see Jen scrunched up on the sofa and no Lilia.

Reader heads up to her room to put her things away, only to stop and stare at Lilia who is silently crying in her bed.

She drops her shit and just crawls in with Lila and holds her.

“Please be real.”

“It’s real, Lilia.”

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

[from-the-owls-nest]

Well... It's your life. and your personality. so nobody gets to tell you or to decide how they want you to be. They can share how they see you, how they've experienced you, and you get to decide if that still fits, or maybe later again, or if that's a Past You thing, or if you just don't know yet. Transformations and Changes and not knowing are human. And people who love you will love you however you are and want you to be happy over keeping any image they built up of you intact and forcing you into it. *cough* my parents

Also: who someone is has so many different parts. things they like, things they're good at, things they do a lot, things they want to do, traits, memories. There's not one thing that defines all of you. And if something changes or goes missing - sometimes things are just behind a cloud, or like hibernating, and come back when there's space for them, like that or in a different form.

And the other thing... Well. Uh. I don't know what future you will think. I don't know what future me will think. And if I don't know - I try to keep the options open until I maybe will know.

I sorta... this will sound silly. I have an agreement with myself that I'll try to make the best choice with the information I have in a moment, so I dont get to be mad at myself later because I was trying my best. And in retrospect that I try to not make choices future me has to clean up or impacts them badly, especially permanently. Like - it's unfair to future me to give up if good things can still happen, if there's options left to try, and a path to continue on and see if it can get better. I think it'd be more unfair to potential future me and the experiences future me could make if things go well, to destroy them with me ahead of time, before I've tried everything to change and better things, than it is to keep going through the rough times and to keep them around until then or until the criteria have changed.

We'll often also hear to think of others and what you'd do to them and to keep living for others, and - that can be a good reason, but it shouldn't be that guilt trip thing, or make it less of your choice. In the end you gotta decide what feels right to you and what you want. Nobody should make you do something you genuinely fully don't want. Just... remember that you aren't alone, and that there's people who love you and would support you in figuring things out and finding out who you wanna be and what you want life to be like, okay?

(OOC: anyone reading - even if you genuinely feel like theres no hope left, please reach out to a safe person and see if things change with a bit of distance or new options can appear - if it could have been a passing cloud or a storm that will end in time, or something that can be fixed by time or help. uh. before you make choices that cant be taken back and may lead to a lot of suffering. Thanks. And Tumblr please dont get mad at me.)

Love love love characters that present themselves as emotionally open social butterflies but the more you see of them the more obvious it is that they’re the most closed off fuckers in the story. Sure, they want to help you with your personal problems and messy emotions, but if you turn that shit back on them, they’ll shut down or deflect every time. Why are you sticking your nose in their business anyway? It’s not like it matters. They’re not a person, they’re just a role being played. They’re the guy who fixes things and saves people. Please ignore the man behind the mask, he’s fine. Everything’s fine.

[pinkiemachine]

Kon x M'gann HC's Part 2 Pretty Please with All the Fixings?

Loving the story.

Alrighty! Part 2!

So, to start off, I’ll just ramble a bit more about M’gann and Kon’s dynamic, then finish up the story :) Also posting this again because I think it turned out SO GOSH DARN CUTE! X3 (P.S. listen to “Bewitched” or “Serendipity” by Laufy. I feel like it captures the ✨ vibes ✨)

So it’s no surprise, after reading part 1, that Kon’s biggest flaw is that he’s very immature. He can get pouty and possessive when M’gann is paying attention to someone else, or when she’s gone for a while. He’s also a bit of an attention seeker, and he loves compliments and positive reinforcement of any kind. The first time M’gann gave him a kiss on the cheek, his world changed forever. Pretty sure it took the other guys about five minutes to snap him out of it. But, thankfully, as the story goes on, Kon gets a crash-course in a lot of things, including curbing his immaturity. He learns that you’re not supposed to roughhouse with girls (unless they’re comfortable with that sort of thing, and even then, don’t hurt them—super-strength and all), and he learns that sometimes M’gann is gonna pay attention to other people or go away for a little while and that’s normal and he doesn’t need to be overly upset about it. (He still pouts and misses her, though. It can’t be helped.) But the thing that he still has a problem with, to this day, is being a bit too aggressive when it comes to defending M’gann. The first time they met another Martian who was horribly rude to her, Kon almost brought out the laser eyes! Like, that dude would have been dust in the wind if the other TT hadn’t stepped in. Kon just can’t stand the idea of anyone hating M’gann, and for such a superficial reason no less! She’s beautiful and should be treated like she’s beautiful! (His words, not mine :) Ultimately, Kon HAS to keep himself in check on that account or else he risks starting an interplanetary war, but boy it’s hard.

M’gann sometimes falls back on her old habits and becomes a “yes woman,” agreeing to everything Kon wants to do even if she secretly wants to do something else. Cassie and Steph are the first to take notice of this behaviour, and help teach her to say “no.” If she’s uncomfortable, Kon isn’t gonna realise it on his own unless she tells him. She’s got to learn to put her foot down on things or she’s gonna be miserable. So M’gann practises this and other types of conversation in front of her mirror at night, and the first time she ever said no to one of Kon’s ideas, she felt so proud of herself! She wouldn’t stop smiling for the whole day! Kon had no idea why she was so happy, but when she was happy, he was happy, so it was a good day all the way around.

The dates they like to go on involve taking long walks around Earth. Neither of them had ever seen an ocean before, so they went to go see the ocean. Neither of them had ever been to a cheese factory before, so they went to go see a cheese factory and got free cheese curds on the way out. Then they went to a real baseball game and ate real hotdogs—they went to a museum (which M’gann liked more than Kon did, but they made it fun in the end)—they went on hikes, marvelling at all the different types of trees and bushes and butterflies and spiders and ants and birds and they even spotted a deer in the distance—and all the while, they would take pictures. So. Many. Pictures. M’gann has this old-school Martian camera and puts photo albums together of all the stuff she and Conner do together, like they’re already an old married couple. lol. Then, of course, when both of them are too tired to go out anywhere, they curl up on the couch and watch some of those old sitcoms M’gann grew up on. M’gann’s favourite is “That Girl” and Kon’s is “Hogan’s Heroes.”

Okay, now I’ve thoroughly set up how much fun they had together, time to make it all come crumbling down.

In the last post I said that Kon kept M’gann’s secret about being a white Martian and her past from the NTT and the JLA, but there was one person he was obligated to tell: Lex Luthor. Being that he was secretly working for the bald maniac, and it was his job to report in with any new information he’d learned, he had no choice. Even when he tried to lie or exclude details, Luthor grew suspicious of him and forced the info out of him. So when the reveal of his betrayal happened, it was so much worse for M’gann. Lex used what he had learned to help take her down, and also create a rift between her and Kon, because he wasn’t supposed to be getting attached to M’gann anyway. Kon was ordered to forget about her because he was never going to see her ever again, and M’gann wanted to forget Kon for sharing her most sacred secret. Not to mention, he had been lying to her from the start about his past, about his intentions, and who knows what else. Had he been using her to get information about the Justice League? About her uncle? Yes, he had, and he wanted to tell M’gann that he was ashamed of what he had done, but Lex wouldn’t let them be in the same room, so M’gann was left to think all sorts of awful things about him. It was a dismal day. This event is covered in full in another post which I will link below.

Now, of course, this story has a happy ending (because happy endings are the best kind of endings). Lex is eventually defeated, Kon is freed from him and LexCorp, and for once he gets to call the shots in his life. The first is going to M’gann and trying to make things up to her in any way he can. Now, at this point, M’gann knows that Lex was twisting Kon’s arm to a certain extent, so her anger is a little softened, but she still feels like an idiot for trusting him so easily, and she’s nervous about trusting him again. He’s still such an immature person—who knows what kind of big mistake he’ll make next?

Kon plucks up his courage and makes a traditional Martian apology to her—the big ceremonial kind meant for state officials and royalty when they’ve severely messed up something BIG—and begs her to give him one more chance. He knows full well that he’s a bit of a dunce when it comes to girls and Earth culture and even being a good person (again, his words) but he wants to be a better friend, he wants to be a good hero, and more than anything else he wants to be the best boyfriend he could possibly be for her. When he was making his decision to finally stand up against Lex, he was afraid of what Lex would do to him… but then he thought of M’gann. He remembered how much she meant to him, and that Lex was planning on hurting her as a part of his evil scheme, and even if it meant Lex would go ahead and terminate him and make another clone, he didn’t care. M’gann mattered more. And she always would. So, with all of this before her, M’gann was quite stunned, to say the least. For a moment, she didn’t know what to say. Given the fact that Kon had partaken in much of Lex’s plan willingly, the JLA agreed that some form of punishment was only fair, so it had been decided that Kon would spend a year on the Kent farm, essentially doing community service by helping them with all the chores. He would be confined to the property during all of that time, too, so the two of them were going to spend the next year in different places. M’gann hesitantly answered Kon’s apology with a “Maybe… I could write to you… and we’ll see where it goes from there.”

Kon was so happy. He plowed through all his chores on the Kent farm each and every day—Ma and Pa, and sometimes Clark when he had the time—would teach him things and show him to do stuff, like carpentry. And then, every day he’d go and check the mailbox, waiting for a letter from M’gann, and when he’d get one, he’d race up to his room (Clark’s old room) and read it ten times over. Then he’d grab a paper and pen and write his response, filling her in on all the things that had happened on the farm the last week or so. They wrote to each other non-stop that year, eagerly, patiently waiting for Kon’s sentence to be up. And when it had been a full year, and Kon came back to the city and the NTT, he and M’gann went for a walk in the park, and without saying a word, they both knew… there was no one else they’d rather spend the rest of their life with.

(Then the picture is from a little party the gang threw in celebration of their victories over all their villains, including Lex, and everyone was encouraged to wear their home country’s traditional garb, and maybe even bring some traditional food or a traditional party game. It was a fun night, and M’gann and Conner got to see each other dressed up for the first time (probably. I haven’t written out each individual episode for the NTT yet, but I like to imagine this is the first time ☺️))

Part 1 👇

Kon’s backstory is included in this post… 👇

[riding-the-sunset-bird]

Hey!

Since I started playing August last year I'd been lurking on the reddit (since I don't have an account) and always found the posts of the person who was writing "what choices determine Cove's X" so insightful and loved reading them

recently, i played the baxter DLC (still am not over it, it's my most favourite thing ever; i just love our pepe le pew) so I spent a lot of time on the reddit just reading up about him and what others thought bcs i LOVE deep analysis on characters that I've liked and I stumbled upon a bunch of your comments (which again, loved reading!) and I put a name to the comment

found the same username on tumblr and simultaneously found out you were the one who goes into the games files and wrote those posts I loved so, AH! Hi!

hahah my 'fangirling' and backstory aside, right after I played Baxter's DLC I felt like I didn't understand the reasons behind his actions? I know everyone talks about how he has self-worth issues and wanted to just be a memory but I don't get how that all correlated to completely detatching and not wanting to be a part of MC's life? Like did he care at all? If he didn't, why keep your number and the gift you gave him in one of the memories (Sightseeing?). But if he did care, how did he so easily at the beginning distance himself professionally? AND THEN REMINISCE ON ALL OUR MEMORIES TOGETHER BUT GO BACK TO PROFESSIONAL; LIKE WHAT WAS THE INTENTION

I feel like it is such a stupid question since it seems like everyone else gets it and the game explains it so many times but I just did not get it 😭

so if you could! could you help me understand it a little better? (and if you have talked about it before, no pressure to rewrite it all here I'd happily read another post of yours about it if you could kindly link it!)

i hope that makes sense haha, hope you have a lovely day and genuienly THANK YOU for what you do with your blog! its so great and even if you don't answer this ask i will LOVE reading everything you still put out!

-jaycee <3

*ahem*

Firstly--AAAAAAA >//////<

Thank you so much!! I do my best to help out so people can understand the code, and at times I just see it as something fun for me. So, when people enjoy them as well, it makes me so happy~

Also, I'd be delighted to answer your questions about Baxter! His DLC is absolutely packed so I get that sometimes it's hard to absorb it all. You asking someone for "help" and wanting to understand (rather than simply giving up or writing the DLC off) is admirable, honestly, not something to feel stupid about!

For me personally, I do believe that there are layers to it, and I'll try to do things in a different enough way/simplify them linearly in case that might help. Included will be quotes from the game to help things flow best.

All that said, let us now go on this journey into Baxter's mind together! ᕕ(ᐛ)ᕗ

(note that this got so long that I put a TL;DR/summarized version at the end, I just thought it was important to go into as much as possible; I also have a Reddit comment here that has a smaller/quoteless explanation)

Childhood and Early-to-Mid Teens

Let's take this chronologically. Picture a young Baxter Alexander Ward all the way back in Golden Grove. He's a rich boy with rich parents, and by rich, we're talking really rich. What already is so much to an adult is virtually limitless in the mind of a child, and it earns him a certain reputation amongst the population. Everyone knows the name of the Mr. and Mrs. Ward's only child, and it makes him extremely popular.

However, that doesn't mean he has true company, especially as his neighborhood situation is quite the opposite from the MC of either Our Life version, who are given one or two easily-accessible friends depending on the game.

"The land my family home was built on… I suppose you could call it somewhat remote. It's a fair-sized estate, situated a little ways off from the rest of the town. So, until I moved into college dorms, I'd go as far as to say that I'd never had neighbors before."

In other words, there's no one around his age nor does he have a sibling to play with. This isn't a big deal at first, given that he's young, innocent, and raised where anything he wanted was in his parents' budget. He's expected to act a certain way, certainly, but he can't understand the idea of needing anymore than what he has: he's the cute rich boy that has "everything" and that every kid wants to be close to.

So much so that it gives him an ego about it.

"What I do distinctly recall is that as a child I unequivocally thought I was better than other people. That those who met me were lucky, and I could pick anyone I wanted as company. The onus was on everyone else to impress. "If someone was boring or maybe I just didn't like the colors they were wearing that day, I could find a new playmate, easily. After all, I had the most to offer. "Naturally, what I was 'offering' was what my parents had. A big, cool house, exciting outings, the best toys. It wasn't until I was eleven or so when I developed my first stable friends. They might not have been rich like me, but they had their own charms. Those ties couldn't be replaced."

"I loved it when they would come and visit; there was scarcely anything better. They never got over their sense of awe, and I ate it up."

"Becoming attached to other people, especially those people, made me realize what I'd believed wasn't true. And it was so obvious. They were wonderful. I felt things I never had before. "All it took was being who they were. It didn't matter what their parents did. No fancy venue could top genuine comradery with their company. "And for whatever reason, I was in the club, and I was happy. The person who was lucky to be there was me. "I had wanted my friends to feel the same way towards me. To have that kind of incredible effect on another person for no reason other than that I was Baxter."

Thus, the confident boy Baxter sees in the mirror everyday, like a framed painting of the kind of person everyone wants to be, becomes distorted. Kids didn't flock to him because he was "Baxter," but because he was a rich boy who could wow them. He felt that even the friends he did manage to acquire only hung out with him because they were lovely people, because they also were not immune to being awed by his rich boy things, and because he got lucky.

Qiu - who's part of his friend group - being his first crush likely doesn't help matters. It's no longer about his own personal satisfaction, where he shows off and the kids involved do little more than stroke his ego; now there are kids who are the ones offering him something, and it's something he didn't even know he was missing.

This begins the initial spark of self-worth issues for Baxter, and it's a spark that snowballs as time goes on. He doubts himself, he doubts his ability to make his friends happy in the way that they make him happy, and he - when he's fourteen - goes so far as to doubt the impression something as simple as his hair gives off.

"The generous might say I could count it as black, or that it was 'black in the right light' as my parents placatingly put it. "The fact of the matter is that it's a dusty gray."

"Who would notice a color that wasn't exactly black? And why would they care, even if they did? "Me. I noticed. I noticed and it bothered me, so I dyed it. "Was it something I wanted only for my own preference, or was it because I believed if I saw it as an imperfection then that meant everyone else did? "Probably the latter."

(note that this is around the time that an MC might meet him in Soiree and potentially become his second crush)

So now you have a double-edged sword of sorts where Baxter wants to be good enough as he is, yet is actively covering up the parts of himself that he deems as flaws to be corrected.

In trying to craft this "perfect/better" version of himself, he's created a scenario in which he cannot win. Even if said version could make people happy, he is still not the real version of himself and goes on believing that any amount of joy he does create isn't even "him" doing it anyway.

This is already excluding the fact that his parents are *:･ﾟ✧ garbage ✧･ﾟ:* who always wanted him to act a particular way, and he knew they'd take issue with him if they didn't raise him personally.

"They understand care through the lens of control and protection. That's been their way ever since I was young. In that sense, they treat me no different from a child. "But, of course, they are quiet, educated, esteemed, and a tad old. As is their company, most days. That's not the environment to act as a kid. "That meant I've always been expected to behave with the maturity of someone their own age, or perhaps even older, somehow. "A bit of a paradox, isn't it? Do everything as an adult would while getting the respect an infant does."

"They're family and I'm their son. That is what matters at the end of the day, blood related or not. "I'm thankful for that as well. "Now, if I wasn't the boy they raised together in any capacity, then there would be problems."

Even the air of sophistication he has comes from his upbringing (though he's at least made that his own). There's the Baxter he actually is, the Baxter his parents expect him to be, and the Baxter he's trying to build up for himself to be someone he thinks can make those he cares for happy, all things that he tries to deal with himself as if that's at all manageable or healthy for him.

To the surprise of no one, things still aren't perfect. Without a trust that his friends like him simply because they like him, he doesn't realize - or refuses to contend with - the truth of the situation, and the age gap between them starts causing difficulties.

"I was older than all of them. As sheltered as I was, I got along better with kids not quite my own age. Immature as always, hm? "Life changed fast then, and the years between us became more noticeable with every day. I never reached a point where I felt like I knew what I was doing before suddenly, it was as if I didn't belong with them anymore. "That they didn't have time to keep me around with the differences in our schedules and priorities. And I accepted that. So, the friendships ended. We stopped talking as young teens, and I haven't even seen them since I left for college in 2015. "I thought they mattered to me, but when have I done anything for them? Why did I deserve to be liked and included when all I did was want that to happen and abandon them when it didn't?"

Now we're getting closer to the white-and-black-haired Baxter we know as, at the time he leaves Golden Grove, he's just one year away from his visit to Sunset Bird and simultaneously no closer to knowing what he's doing. He's broken off from his old, cherished, and only significant friend group, and now he's all the way on the other side of the country in Virginia by himself.

He's still chaotic, still kindhearted, yet has no clue that he deserves to have the kind of companionship he longs for. In the year of him being at college, he fails to make those kinds of connections, whether intentionally or otherwise.

"Instead, you could say I don't have many friends. I spend the majority of my time on my own, though I do attend parties and other gatherings when I am able. "I do not have anything quite similar waiting for me there. Don't feel bad about that. "It is only to be expected. I did move across the country. It is a fairly common phenomenon for those of us who do. I'm a regular fish out of water, if you will."

"It hasn't been easy to find anyone to reminisce with, not for a while. But then again, I only developed a sentimentality once I'd gone off to college. "I was too young and proud for that sort of matter before then. There wasn't anything in my life to harbor much sentimentality for. I suppose leaving was the catalyst. Isn't it always? "But once that part of my mind had developed, there wasn't anyone around to share the emotions with. My classmates and I… we don't have that kind of relationship."

His parents are also just as controlling as ever, only allowing him to enjoy his semester off from college under their rules and in a place they personally chose and are comfortable with. Baxter, who had no interest in going home to Golden Grove and thus agrees to the terms, can only make himself comfortable by finding his own ways of having fun, such as renting a car despite being underage.

"At a minimum, I can honestly say that I wish that I missed it, if that makes sense. I don't know how you feel about your hometown particularly, but you should at least be able to appreciate that I spent all of my youth there. "I'm not so jaded as to totally discount the place, far from it. But anything I liked about my home wasn't exactly exclusive to that locale. The US is a big country, and there are plenty of beautiful things to see wherever you go. "I've experienced enough to know that much, at least. So no, I don't miss it. And I won't be going back. "If my parents wish to see me, they'll have to be the ones visiting where I am.

"Mother and Father agreed to me vacationing on my own, but under the condition that they would have the choice of where I stayed. "California being fairly close by, and Sunset Bird being so quaint, not to mention our prior excursions to the area, they concluded that this was the easiest way to keep me out of trouble."

Basically, it's all going back to his line about expecting him to behave as an adult whilst treating him like a child. He's permitted to vacation by himself but only in a town as "boring" as Sunset Bird where there would naturally be very few teenagers around his age. His streak for being a bit of a rebel reflects that.

What he doesn't expect is to meet a new group of people and the MC in particular, who unintentionally challenges his negative view on himself.

Step 3

From the very beginning, Baxter takes immediate interest in the MC and Cove, wanting to make one of those "blissful, temporary relationships" that will last the summer. Already, we have something of note, which is the 50/50 success rate he ended up having: MC and Terry were all for the absurdly friendly monochrome man that swooped into town, whereas Cove and Miranda were more hesitant (and thus didn't spend as much time with him) because his directness tended to put them off.

"I care a great deal about what I say and that it makes the correct impression. Yet I am not always successful. My approach is off, really."

"Now, this may be a complete shock to you, but… I've been told that I can come across as a bit too forward. I know. It can be hard to believe. My intent is to be open with people so we can connect. It almost never works out that way, though. I've had to come to terms with the fact that I don't possess a knack for making friends. "It was obnoxiously easy when I was a child. Especially due to that aforementioned big, cool house. But now I keep finding myself at a loss for how to do it. With the hit-or-miss endeavor, the vast majority of the time I come up with a miss."

"And I've never been in a stable, long-term relationship. They've all been brief, and varying levels of disastrous."

Put more simply, Baxter knows what he wants but doesn't understand what people want out of him (believing more that they don't want him at all). On some level, he's flying blind and simply does what he can to put his best foot forward, not wanting to miss opportunities when they present themselves to him. He's someone who likes seeing people thrive and enjoy themselves, and it's even better if he knows that he caused it.

"I live for approval."

Thus, as the "perfect summer tourist" who wants to vacation and have a fun time with those that he can, he seeks to do everything possible to make it memorable. That doesn't mean that he goes out of his way to do things he doesn't want to or portray himself as this person who doesn't even resemble who he actually is, but he puts on an air of not having any flaws that would cause him to be any form of burden to others.

This is even excluding the parallel of a group of four friends that he's involved with yet feels distant from or like he doesn't belong in at the same time; history repeating itself and what not, though in his case it's more like a self-fulfilling prophecy, emphasized by the possibility of him asking the MC out on a summer fling.

"I don't care about what label you'd choose to put to it. I could be your boyfriend, or nothing at all. "And you can also change your mind without consequence, if you find out it's not what you imagined further down the line."

Baxter gives the MC every out he can to make things as convenient as possible for them, not only so that the relationship isn't serious and they don't have to worry about it, but so they can break it off whenever they wish. He knows full well that even the person he's presenting himself as won't please everyone and sets everything up so he can almost anticipate the ending if the MC gets bored with him because he fails to impress.

He's interested in them, attracted to them, and feels that he'll enjoy their company, but he only thinks he can do the same on the short-term; that small amount of time where people are still learning about one another where little else is hoped for beyond good things.

Another way of looking at it is based on Baxter's view of control.

"It might not surprise you to know that I can be a touch… particular. I know the importance of coherence, with individuals acting in a well-coordinated fashion. And I like things to function well-for systems to operate smoothly. "I confess, you could call me controlling, at times. Not with people, but with processes. Especially when it comes to enacting plans. I'd much rather act under my own steam than follow someone else's lead. "I'm only flexible with the personal, not the business, aspects of life."

His relationship with the MC is, on some level, a process. It's something for him to carefully plan out and calculate to make it the best he can for them. Getting more personal would involve him revealing the parts of himself that he finds distasteful and believes the MC will as well.

Of course, he doesn't anticipate growing attached to them, which brings in the "risk versus reward" aspect. This can be seen when Baxter initially agrees to have drinks with the MC in the morning that he hates so much, where the safe option would be to simply postpone until another day, except he wants to spend time with them as soon as possible.

In that respect, it's not unlike him struggling to decide on the type of ice cream he'd like.

"My problem is this: I'm unsure if I should get a dessert that's to my usual taste. If I do, I'd be certain to enjoy what comes from the ice cream truck. That would be nice. "But, on the other hand, this may happen only once. Perhaps it'd be more rewarding to get something new, an option that would be challenging to find in a common store. "Which will add more to the experience? Indulgence or novelty? I want to make the right choice."

However, his risks don't end up panning out well in his mind because he's unable to get past something so minor as forgetting his wallet, when all he and the MC had planned to do was have a nice time at a cafe in Drinks. In his mind, the Baxter he's trying to present had failed, and what else can he do at that point (under his perceived logic) but do what he remembers worked from childhood?

"It's a question of knowing the right people who know the right people. We could have even had full backstage access with the main cast if I'd asked. "I do try not to lean on that kind of thing too much, if you can believe me. I appreciate it might not look like it now. You could say it's a means for me to preserve my sense of independence. It's easy to be popular if you can foot the bill, and I don't want that to be what draws others to me. "But after all that, here I am, leaning on the same old crutch. Nothing has changed since I was six."

"I suppose that was part of the issue. I didn't consider myself appealing enough as a person to be worth the time. So, I wanted the support of an exciting or interesting backdrop for meetups. "But… it shouldn't matter that much where you are if you enjoy who you're with."

Baxter expects perfection out of himself in the same way that his parents expected things out of him, and the limitations follow accordingly. He wants little more than the MC's presence and it is up to him to "repay them" for it. When he was a child, he was the one everyone else had to impress, and now it's the other way around: he has to impress those he wants to be around.

Except he's only human, and aiming to be the perfect person for the MC all summer simply isn't feasible, which he takes with every ounce of criticism one can imagine.

"This whole situation… it's asinine. I haven't known you long enough to be causing this kind of trouble. I'm quite literally a stranger. And I won't even be here long enough for that to change. As welcoming as you all are here, that can't be forgotten. "This was-I was-only ever supposed to be a part of the fun. A worthwhile piece of summer scenery. Someone who added to the experience, not held it back. You shouldn't have to baby me! To sit there and spend your time making me feel better when I don't keep it together. "The mess I am in the mornings, the drama I cause in the evenings: the person I am when the show is over. Those aspects shouldn't be any of your concern. I don't provide that support to you, do I? And how could I when I don't know you? "No. It's not fair to make you worried or, worse, guilty over what happens to me. What matters is that when we're together it's for the pleasant parts of existence. The less ideal shades of life can be managed separately. "That's all I wanted."

Two things to note as well is that he'll say all of the same dialog even if he and the MC have experienced Hang or Planning (where Baxter can comfort them), and there's a dialog path in Sightseeing (i.e: the moment most players will play first) where he'll openly say that he hopes they count for "more than strangers."

(He's additionally rejected the idea that he knows the MC despite relishing every given opportunity to listen to the MC babble about even the most mundane things.)

So not only will he deny to himself that comforting the MC was worth enough to count (or unintentionally block it from his mind), but when it comes to things becoming more personal, suddenly he's "just a stranger/near-stranger." The MC can be comforted when they need it but not him, and he's just some nobody tourist when it comes time to put any value on himself...

whether that be the simple things like driving everyone around, to the stuff that takes effort to notice like him seeing that the MC wanted to ride in the passenger seat, to the more complex like literally saving Miranda's entire birthday party.

"I couldn't have devised a more pleasant way to spend my time here, even if I tried. And to be frank, I have tried. I didn't come to Sunset Bird totally devoid of any plans or ideas. "You and your friends have invited me to participate in an event with great significance to you. It's a profound gesture to show to a relative stranger. "When it's over, and I'm long gone from here, I hope you can all look back on this party for years to come-maybe for the rest of your lives-and treasure the memory. "And if I am a part of that memory, then that is satisfaction enough. Though perhaps I'm in danger of giving my contribution too much credit."

A hypocrite (I say this affectionately, I swear) of the highest order; there are rules for himself and no other rules for everybody else. The things he does are never enough whereas everyone else does plenty by simply existing and giving him the time of day.

Leaving the way he does with no contact and little hope of seeing each other again is the inevitable result of the process he'd put together for his time with the MC and his summer at Sunset Bird. From the beginning, he's had a time frame to keep to, an intent to not get attached, an expectation that no one would get attached to him, and an idea that he would leave as little more than a memory.

"Only lately it's been different. Incredibly different. I almost worry my luck won't last. It will all be over soon. "I wish… I could stay."

Except he does get attached, just as the MC gets attached to him (in what he can admit in Step 4 is the most stable relationship he's ever been in), and now all the control he feels he had goes out the window. That's why he has the potential to get upset if the MC keeps pushing his buttons by questioning him.

"I would've preferred it to have been an enjoyable time having my company while I happened to be here, that was the intention. It seems I've ruined that on the whole. I accept the blame for that. If I had behaved better this wouldn't have come to a close on such an abhorrent note. "However, I am not an irreplaceable part of your life. I was a tourist, a novelty. And now I'm not even that. So don't bother with this."

To him, everything is so obvious: he got "lucky" getting to hang out with his Golden Grove friends, who were simply so nice that they continued bothering with him at all despite his flaws. Considering how that ended, he expected the same where no one would bat an eye if he left.

The MC trying to hang onto what they have isn't a sign that he had done anything right, but that the MC is being their sweet, considerate self in thinking about him. He's had at least five years of criticizing himself, of trying to make people happy yet downplaying it when he does, that everything the MC says goes in one ear and out the other.

"I heard you then and each reasonable suggestion to salvage the situation, but I brushed you off as if you were the one being dramatic. Or that you were lying."

At some point between having his Golden Grove friend group to now, his priorities had changed. He'd given up on having true value to people and instead focuses on creating moments (an appropriate word to use given how the game works) with them. It's a natural progression from not believing he's important to not believing he could ever possibly be.

Even basic traits he does have that one will likely see as something to adore, he won't attribute to himself.

"Now, I do admit, though, that isn't what one might call a grand love story. It's simplicity itself. "I'm not the most romantic or sentimental person in the world. I know that can be at odds with my formality, yet it's the way I am."

He'll say he's not romantic nor sentimental while being one of the most romantic and sentimental people in the game, so either he's unaware of it or refuses to associate positive words like those with himself. On the flip side, he can falsely associate others with credit for things they've done without acknowledging the finer details that might negate his point.

For example, in the Wedding DLC, Baxter gives so much credit to Cove for "staying" and "trying" without understanding that Cove didn't have a choice on whether to stay or leave the MC initially due to still being a child (who absolutely would have left and in fact did try to leave in the Step 1 DLC). He's also one of the few characters who doesn't consider Cove "clingy," probably because he's just as clingy if not more so.

By unknowingly projecting his self-hatred onto the MC's view of him, he's come to the idea that the MC has already gotten as much out of the relationship with him as possible without things completely falling apart, and daring to want anything further is his own self-interest/ego getting to him.

It's even to the point of deciding that everything is his fault if the MC kissed him in Planning when they weren't dating.

"I must apologize for that. I shouldn't have done it. Even at the time I knew I shouldn't have. That was a bad idea. One that only managed to complicate our relationship further. "I shouldn't have involved you in more of my selfishness."

So his conclusion in the Step 3 ending is that he's lost no matter what and genuinely cannot comprehend the idea that he had done anything right for the MC to want to stay in contact with him.

If the MC contently accepts separating from him, then that proves to him that he isn't someone worth sticking around for. If they instead get upset or want to stay in touch, then he has somehow done something wrong in the way he went about things and presented himself. It all goes back to being a scenario he's set himself up not to win.

"In short, what I'm saying is that I'm a fraud in all regards. You can't take any of it seriously, including what color my hair is."

"I don't deserve to have that kind of relationship with another person. That's why. I don't contribute anything. "Maybe I can impress others for a time, but how do you go beyond that? I can't say what it means to be significant as a person, to be irreplaceable. "And since I don't have the answer, I certainly wasn't going to assume I'd do it by accident. What does it take to add value to someone simply just by being there? I tried, but I never knew. "In my eyes there's a world of humans living freely among one another, while every connection I create is so fragile. If I make the wrong step I might hurt them, or be hurt myself, and if it's strained at all it will break entirely."

The sad part of it is that it makes sense, in a way. The things he did for the MC - baring perhaps that damned chocolate fountain - were almost effortless to him. He wanted to do them, so why would he think he did anything special?

One of the very few times he's willing to talk in any way bad about another is only if the MC uses Jude and Scott's relationship as a reason for why they could keep in touch. That's when his cynical side comes out.

"Of course, my rather reasonable prediction is that it will not last. Most relationships don't."

As things were that summer, Baxter viewed the MC as someone he would love to know, but not someone who wanted to know him because he doesn't think he's likable; that the slightest inconvenience to them - to anyone - would make him not worth keeping in touch with any longer. The MC also has friends who have been around longer than him, and he's never considered that he could have any role amongst them.

Tempting fate was never his intention, yet that's exactly what he does in believing they'll never meet again, drawn together as if the longing makes them magnetic to each other.

Step 4

As is standard with the inevitable passage of time and growing older, Baxter is slowly finding himself and improving as a person over the five years that he and the MC are apart. Some things change and others stay the same, whether for better or worse.

Though, any positives aren't particularly noteworthy to Baxter himself.

"I can say that I've improved some talents over the years and found a less eye-catching sense of style, but for anything meaningful there's been no growth."

Due to his self-worth issues, he never thinks what he does is good enough and is wholly focused on where he's yet to improve upon, even though he is fully aware about the parts of himself he has worked on.

"You don't need to worry. I'm not quite as sensitive as I used to be about mistakes. I will survive this, pride as wounded as it may be from these trials and tribulations."

"Part of the tragedy of adult life is learning to roll with the punches, so to speak. I suppose I should be proud of the fact that I can at least handle it much better than when I was younger. "Thinking about what kind of panic a younger Baxter would have been thrown into at the prospect of a missing shirt on an important day-"

Under that lens, it doesn't matter what he does or how he deals with the issues he feels are a burden to himself and/or others; there's always an asterisk - that he's attached to them - to act as a "yes, but..."

"I'm fortunate that thanks to my upbringing I happen to be well acquainted with formality and what it takes to authentically achieve it for an event. It's a unique kind of direct experience to wield. "Additionally, I deal well with the high level of control and detail-work one must take in a stressful event. "When it comes to work, I absolutely can make decisions. It's only in my personal life where I lack conviction. "And that's most suited in bursts with different people rather than a long-term position in a consistent group. You can easily get sick of someone who needs everything to be 'just so'."

Similar to the weddings he involves himself with as he graduates and gets a career as a wedding planner, there is an ideal final product to work towards, but one he could never conceivably be happy with because he's already starting from a place of seeing himself as someone worthless as an individual. It shapes said final product into something entirely unrealistic, never mind completely unachievable.

As for figuring out a life for himself, that goes hand-in-hand with where he ultimately chooses as his first place to live: Prism Vista City, which Mr. "Definitely Not Sentimental" ends up getting attached to.

"This, ahem, particular location was intended to be only a starting point. I was coming from the complete other side of the country, and I at least knew I enjoyed the area. "I expected to relocate once I had my bearings. It wasn't my intention to linger where I might not be welcomed. "But who could've guessed it was harder to pack up and leave everything behind once you had silly things such as an 'actual apartment in your own name' and a 'real career' tying you down? "Weeks passed, then months, and then, perhaps inevitably, I came face to face with one of the reasons I developed such a positive outlook on this state to begin with. "You know, it never ceases to amaze me. California is directly beside Oregon. I could practically walk there if I was industrious, and stupid, enough. "Despite that, being here is a wholly different experience than what I had being raised in the neighboring state. "Sometimes it seems as if I'm still a tourist. That I don't belong here, and everyone who passes by can smell the otherness on me. "Other days, I have the confidence to think I've found my own place in the world…"

That's one thing that never changes about Baxter in virtually all of his life: the desire to simply belong somewhere. What does change is how he approaches that want.

He wanted to belong with his Golden Grove friends, but fell out with them due to the circumstances and chalked it up to a failure on his part. When he wanted to belong with his Sunset Bird ones, he'd already decided himself that it would never happen to save him from any potential disappointment, and that simply being there for a summer would be enough.

In adulthood, he's given up on such things entirely. No more friends, no more flings, and even his most consistent contact - his parents - have been cut out of his life (though in the latter case, it's for the better).

"What happened, I do exactly… that to everyone who unfortunately crosses my path. "The acquaintances I made at college, dancing partners, the friends I had since childhood; my parents, though, that is an entirely different story. "The point of the matter is, excluding those I interact with regularly due to work, I have no relations whatsoever. That's simply the way it goes."

"To start, I haven't spoken to my parents in, mm, a few years now. That's what I meant when I included them in the list of relationships I haven't maintained. "Don't worry. It isn't a painful topic for me, exactly. Mostly I find it… disappointing. Frustrating? Certainly awkward. "Before I cause too much concern, they've never done anything to intentionally hurt me; my parents have always cared for my well-being. "And I can't deny how much they have done for me - all the opportunities and advantages I had because they provided them. They gave me the best they knew how and- "This is not as nuanced as I might be making it sound. "What a novelty it would be if I could speak favorably of my own family. Can you imagine? "That's not the case, however. "What I am trying to say is that my parents are, on the whole, good to me. And they do love me as their child whom they raised for nearly two decades. "Just as I still feel compelled to give them credit for the minimum, I'm certain they're telling their acquaintances endless excuses for why I'm so distant and unagreeable with them. "They haven't given up on me, in their own way. "But all that does not make them good people. "I can assure you that because they are not good people. I'm merely a rare exception to the unpleasantness. "My parents are selfish- they're sheltered. Even as adults."

"Imagining myself as not their son and not someone they loved seemed meaningless at the time. They did love me and that's what mattered. "Of course, it's not always enough, is it? "If I wasn't theirs, either through birth or adoption, if I was someone else's son, they… would hate me. "I know I'm foolish, on many counts. It took me a long time to realize that them being hypocritical shouldn't reassure me the way it did. "Baxter Ward could have as many 'shortcomings' or 'problems' as he did and it'd be fine because it was 'different' in that case. There were reasons, can't you see? "But they couldn't see that other people deserved the same kind of understanding. "And that some things weren't 'problems' in the first place…"

The true tragedy of it being that it's heavily implied that Baxter's parents did attempt to teach him or at least act in a way that would lead him towards a life without any meaningful relationships, which is what he got when he became an adult but not ever what he truly wanted.

"And their nonsense priorities and concerns are what my parents expected from me! "How ironic that I can finally see the silver lining of my lifelong struggles thanks to them. "If I never realized how poor my connections were, or if I never cared that my relationships were nothing more than associations based on conveniences, maybe I'd have been who they wanted."

Arguably, Baxter is at the most "successful" place in his life: he might not be rich anymore, but he's making his own money with a job that suits him, he has a nice apartment, and he's living comfortably.

Except he's not happy, and convinces himself that it's as good as he's ever going to get. It's both the highest and lowest point of his life.

"Of course, I wouldn't be able to understand the viewpoint of someone willing to commit themselves to another person for the rest of their life. "It's what makes for a good planner. I can get invested just enough in the premise to truly create something special, but I'm not attached to the real relationship. "And I'm not disappointed when it's over. "It's been years since I was careless enough to be hurt by anything. "I'd given up on trying for more than what I already had. Then I told others, and myself, that meant I was always content. But honestly, it made me bitter. "I didn't become the person I wanted to be. I didn't achieve the kind of life I'd hoped for."

He couldn't even maintain his relationship with dance, something he'd adored since he was young and now limits to lessons given to wedding couples.

"In a way, I fell out of love with that passion. "It became tedious and unsatisfying to do it with complete strangers, and I didn't have enough hours in a day to dedicate to a long-term competitive partner any longer. "But perhaps I should've tried harder not to give it up entirely. "How embarrassing… even my choice of hobby revolved around having a serious and understanding relationship with someone else. "The precise matter I've had a lifelong struggle to obtain."

As for the MC, Baxter misses them desperately, but goes about his life as though he doesn't. He's committed to viewing himself as someone who doesn't deserve them and that what he did was the right thing to do.

It would seemingly be "easy" then to let go of anything that reminds him of them, in hopes of either limiting the times that he finds himself thinking back to those moments or steering himself towards moving on, but he can't.

The MC's souvenir (if they gave him one)...

"I am fond of it even now. I've never been able to part with it. But isn't that what souvenirs are for? Keeping for the long term? "I'm being entirely reasonable for holding onto that after thoroughly leaving everything in Sunset Bird behind."

Their number...

"I had your number all along. "Of course, I never looked at it over the years we were apart, but didn't have it in me to delete it either."

Even the khaki shirt he wore during Mountain (if he and the MC were dating at the time and they invited him up to their room)...

"It remains my stolen property to this day."

He keeps all of them, unable to let go of the feelings the MC caused within himself but locking them deep inside rather than addressing them. He has the very method for contacting the MC at any time to reconnect, to explain himself, to apologize, to confirm or reject his own doubts over what happened, but he doesn't out of fear.

"I said it before- my concern was protecting my own feelings. Anything I did to that end felt justified. "The more time and experience let me reflect on my actions, I only became more convinced I should stick to my word and not trouble you further."

"I've also missed you over those five years. "And Terry and Miranda and Cove and that summer in Sunset Bird, but mostly, it was you who I thought of. "During that trip, I did feel wanted. "You made me feel wanted. And… important. "It was exciting and amazing, and felt impossible it could last. The shine would wear off eventually, as always. I didn't want to see it happen. "What if I seemed pathetic for being attached to people I met on a short vacation? You had your real group of friends who lived with you there already. "Or what if you stopped responding to me after realizing I wasn't that interesting? Or why would I have even assumed there'd be a reason to talk to me at all once it was no longer convenient? "I'm aware that's not a kind way to view you, but it wasn't that you'd done something to make me believe it would happen. It's my viewpoint for every situation."

Baxter never once thinks that the MC is a bad person, simply that he is the problem and even the best of people will "understandably" lose interest in him if there's any interest to begin with. As someone who likes control and has been conditioned to stray away from more personal relationships, it's advantageous to him to remain in his self-sabotaging mindset.

It's what he's used to.

"I can't afford to flitter off on vacations whenever the mood strikes the way my parents can, but I have a very comfortable existence. "It's nice, if lonely. "Of course, let's not pretend I have anyone to blame for that other than myself. I ended every relationship I had with my own actions. "It's the story of my life. I want to be liked, but I don't want to be important. "A suitor for a season, the planner at a wedding- it's that kind of role I'm comfortable in. "Perhaps that's why I'm drawn to people who are wanted by everyone else. They don't need me. I can be someone, I can't be 'the one'."

So when his Step 4 begins and the MC unexpectedly shows up back in his life, five years after Baxter expressed confidence that they would never meet again, he can barely handle it. Without his say so, he's being confronted with feelings that haven't faded, and ones he already thinks are ridiculous of him to have considering how short of a time he'd known the MC.

The best he can think to do is to put on an air of professionalism and brush the rest off. He'd already left, not contacted the MC for so long, and had remained determined to never see them again, so he doubles down on it.

"I'm merely an employee of your friends. Please feel free to ignore me entirely."

However, it's not tenable, because Baxter has never been someone with the impulse control to keep him in check. Even in the few days he knows that the MC will be around and then leave afterwards, holding himself back from doing what he wants isn't something he can keep up for that long.

In front of people like Jude and Scott who he doesn't know, it's at least easier, but around someone like Xavier who he has some form of friendlier relationship with (only a day after he'd conveyed to himself and the others that he's nothing more than the wedding planner), he's already dropping stories about the past.

"As soon as it comes to you it appears my reason goes out the window. Along with much of my dignity. "But that is how it is."

"Enjoying myself in your presence is the most natural thing in the world. Frustratingly so, at times. I find myself letting go of more than I intended to."

It's also not that Baxter doesn't want to talk to the MC because, if the MC tries to get him to talk during the ride back from the bakery, he deliberately makes it a game of rock-paper-scissors that they'd be guaranteed to win if they wanted to. He could've shut them down entirely if he didn't care, but he finds a middle ground of technically not agreeing outright while still letting the MC talk to him.

"The petty types of decisions that were best suited to be decided with randomness mattered little to me. "It was far more amusing to see who would use the advantage they had to win and who would be willing to take the loss, and why they seemed to do so. "At the bare minimum I'm not that much of a brat any longer. "As an adult, I use it mainly to get away with not making decisions of my own. Whoever is playing with me has the responsibility to win or lose because what they're up against is preordained. "I don't even need to choose which symbol my hand takes. It's easier that way."

Not that it means he's alright with it either. Baxter is already under the stress of planning a wedding in a matter of days and now has to deal with seeing the MC again, sometimes one-on-one. He doesn't want to be cruel to them, doesn't want things to be so difficult, nor did he want the MC to be "forced" to go with him to the bakery (on a suggestion he couldn't have known would lead to it), but that's what ends up happening.

"I'm not any less immature than I was five years ago, it seems. I've been incredibly rude to you, and that is inexcusable. "You're not unwelcome near me. Of course not. "However, I'm here to plan Jude and Scott's wedding. My priority is that only, and I don't want to get caught up in anything else. "There's no need to reminisce. I hope that's not insulting, it's honestly not meant to be a strike against your character. "You are a lovely person and have many wonderful friends. You don't need me to be an active part of your life."

"I apologize for what happened between us, I honestly do regret it. "I am sorry I hurt you. I am sorry I was unable to keep my word and have bothered you yet again. "I'm thoroughly humiliated and have attempted to get in your way as little as possible. Though I'm unable to quit outright; I couldn't do that to Jude and Scott. "We are both aware that I am fully incapable of making you happy. But in four days you'll return to your life blissfully free of my presence in it. "Please tell me, what can I do for you? I simply don't know…"

It feels terrible for him, but this is the cycle he's gotten himself into: wanting to stick to what he'd done in Step 3 under the belief that the MC would be better off without him, feeling nostalgic for the past to the point where it ends up coming out, behaving distantly as a result and hating himself for it, then apologizing just to do it all over again because he's constantly going against what he actually wants.

"Every time I'm arrogant enough to believe I know what I'm doing and that I'm in control- I don't and I'm not."

"From the moment you walked into that restaurant, my actions were nothing but self-preservation and damage control and, occasionally, reminiscing to an extent I was pleased with. "Yes, I had a 'professional commitment' not to let personal matters impede the work that needed to be done, but my distancing went far beyond that. "In the end, I was using their marriage as an excuse. "If not for that, then there would have been something else. Some trivial reason for keeping you at arm's length. That likely doesn't shock you."

Baxter is essentially shielding his heart from the very thing that would protect him from his own attacks on it. He goes so far that he considers texting the MC directly to be overstepping boundaries (even if it's for work), all after continuing to let go the most whenever he's reminded of times with the MC.

He's aware that he's attached and readily admits as much when it comes time to.

"Even I can admit I wouldn't do this for every client. "And somehow, that makes this worse. It's painfully obvious I have some personal investment, enough to merit this. "More than I intended to be. More than I ought to have. "I wouldn't have done this if you weren't here… "Even though Miranda was the client's sister- "I wouldn't have offered. It'd be overreaching, to do as much as I have. "I've gone beyond the line of pure professionalism more than once already. The cake is the icing on top."

"Well, naturally, it's against my better judgment to make anyone uncomfortable. "Of course, in such a tight spot Jude wouldn't have questioned any help he was offered. "But what would Miranda have thought? And Terry as well? If some strange man they knew long ago was getting that personally involved in their situation? "I wouldn't have crossed that line, no matter how much sympathy I had for Jude's position. "So, where did my confidence come from? Very simply- I thought you would understand. "That I had good intentions, that the odd lengths I went to was merely how I am, that it was okay to let me be involved. And if you did understand, everyone else would as well."

Deep down, he knows that he is not a stranger; that he knows the MC and trusts them on a level deeper than he thought possible before meeting them. The MC brings out the best in him while simultaneously revealing the most vulnerable parts of himself to himself, which gives him all forms of conflicting emotions.

"I… "It's odd, really. I'm the one who left. "And yet I haven't stopped seeing you as someone important to me. Important in my life. "It truly does seem as though everything I did was for no reason at all."

"It's been hard not to feel nostalgic, this past week. We've had quite a stroll down memory lane. Sometimes by happenstance, sometimes because I went out of my way to do so. "I have… fond memories of those days in Sunset Bird. Treasured memories. "Like most treasures, they're things to be taken out and admired from time to time, and then put away again. "Though, some are too delicate for even that. They should never be touched. "This evening is a reprise of something I never wished to relive."

To put it in another way, though Baxter cherishes the time he spent with the MC, anything that brings him back to such times confront him with everything he's tried to avoid.

Yearning for the things he'd tried to put behind him, the what ifs of things going differently, and the doubts of all he's done thus far based on his own conclusions...

"Back then, during my tourist phase, we took that brief trip to the mountains. On a hike, we passed a tree that had fallen across a stream. "If you can picture that, it was as if we were on opposite sides, and I couldn't take the path to you because it looked risky."

Not unlike his fear of the ocean, Baxter's biggest hurdle is that final step past the point of no return: taking the plunge and trusting in his ability to survive.

"It seems endlessly deep and unpredictable, with powerful waves and rapid currents. "And there are creatures lurking in there. Some of them are larger than me. It's unfathomable. You don't play with something like that. "If I enter that water, I'll never return from it. The ocean will swallow me whole. That's what I think."

It's only by the end of the wedding reception that he finally crosses that line and has the epiphany necessary to deal with everything that had happened: the opening of the oven to check the result of a baked cake rather than leaving it a mystery, the flick of the switch to look at a room he'd always kept in darkness prior, and the throwing of himself into deep water and realizing he can still breathe.

"In the past, I spent every moment around other people thinking of the limited span of our acquaintance. As if I wasn't seeing them at all, only the imminent departure. "Our arrangements fell in line with that. A clear timeframe, limited from the outset; predetermined rules set in stone. "It was that way five years ago. It was that way now. "We'd cooperate for a short period in service of Scott and Jude's wedding, and that would be that. I've said as much myself. More than once. "The problem is, as I only recently realized… "I forgot about that. "You see, I thought, completely and earnestly, that I didn't need to speak with you now, here, when I was feeling so… sensitive. "We could simply pick up where we left off later tonight or tomorrow. The fact that we no longer had a 'reason' to interact didn't come up as part of the consideration."

When he wasn't the one setting the rules, when he was the one caught off guard by someone he cared so much about reappearing into his life, when he was forced back into reliving past regrets and under the pressure of facing them all over again when their second/third time together was over, that ended up being when he found what he needed to talk to the MC. That was when he finally had to listen to what his heart was saying rather than constantly denying himself.

Perhaps even most importantly, that was when he had to face the fact that what he did - the suffering he put himself through for five years - had achieved nothing of value, and it's only through acknowledging it that he can keep it from happening again.

"When I left five years ago, that didn't make me happy. When I kept you at arm's length after meeting again, I was unhappy still. "If it doesn't need to be that way, if I was wrong, then… I don't know, honestly. I've never considered it a viable option until moments ago."

"It had been so long since I'd known what it was like to be included, to be around people who'll refuse to let you be left out, no matter how hard you try to weasel out of it. "Terry, Miranda, and Cove were too kind, but it was your gestures specifically that are at the heart of this matter. "Here's the truth: if you didn't ask me to dance again, in the afterhours of another event we helped create like you did then, it would have broken my heart. "That would mean definitively that I lost what we had. "But… if you did ask it would be more painful. Because that would mean- "It would mean even after everything, you hadn't let me go. That you accepted me still. "That you always would have, that I should've believed that all along, that the only thing I've done was hurt you and myself of my own accord. "It's horrible. I didn't want to know one way or the other."

The uncomfortable truth, a placating lie, or the blissful void of not knowing anything at all: those were the choices he had and he finally chose the uncomfortable truth, all for the closure the MC deserves and the potential prospect of a better future if he can only make it past the obstacles he'd set up for himself.

"But I can see now that I'm also wrong for making another decision for you. Even if the conversation went disastrously, you were owed a better explanation and an apology. "You had never asked me to leave you alone, I created that fiction. "I hope you can accept that I did care for you then- I care now. Of course, as ever, none of it counts for much if it's kept entirely to oneself."

"It's… a little hard to approach what I've sowed over the years. So many mistakes. "And even now, when I hope to make things right, to make things last, I'm forced to admit that I'm ignoring the reality of the situation. "This doesn't come down to what I want at all. I don't have the right to put myself before you. I never did."

"I suppose that is the true story of my life: me not understanding a thing and getting it all wrong at every turn. "But rather than dancing around this, I'll say it directly: not trying to stay in touch with you is something I've regretted for a long time. "I will always regret the days I lost, even now that we've reconnected."

That doesn't mean everything is magically fixed, nor that he won't fall into some old habits. He has to catch himself when he automatically excludes himself from the MC's meeting with their moms, and he'll still be apologizing and criticizing himself long after the MC has forgiven him.

"You've never allowed me to wallow in my misery, except for when you had to. When I made you have to because you couldn't get a hold of me. "But when I see you, I'm reminded of what it is like to be seen. "How it feels to have someone who knows you, cares about you, has memories with you, who wants to make more memories together. "And I tried to undo that- "Twice. By keeping you as far away from me as I could."

"Unfortunately, I've yet to think of a good reason why this admission isn't another of my patently bad ideas. It isn't as though I've been thoughtful in return. "I can't stand doing anything in the morning, even if I can pretend to, for my clients. As you know, I can't afford elaborate trips these days. "My only remaining social contacts are limited to the wedding industry, not performative theatre or owners of fancy cars or the like. "I've never been a good partner, even a good friend, to anyone who has crossed my path."

"My few victories were hollow and I'm still sorry I took that out on you at the start of this."

Nevertheless, he has no desire to run away from the MC now, because he never had a desire to run in the first place. He just needed to understand that it was okay to want, and that he wasn't the worthless person he thought he was so he could stop projecting how he felt about himself onto how people feel about him.

This makes way for Baxter to experience a lot of things that most people would have long since had at that point in their lives: he gets excited simply by having a person hanging out at his house, is incredibly pleased to have someone he can be (dance) with, and he's so amazed that he can have these things in his life that he's actively eager to prove to the MC how much he'll be sticking around, to the point of being ready to visit them at the soonest time possible.

"Hallelujah. Admittedly, a part of me was convinced I wouldn't go through with it. What if you thought I had lost my mind to follow you right after we barely reestablished a connection? "But having this last day together, knowing it was the last, was the final push to pursue what I actually wanted."

His story, essentially, is about a fall from issues of self-centeredness just to pendulum swing into ones of self-worth instead. It's about balancing on a tightrope of bringing short bursts of happiness to others while trying not to let his ego take hold of him again. It's about denying himself what he wants and refusing to hear otherwise before finally recognizing that he deserves to be happy.

That's Baxter Ward.

TL;DR:

Baxter starts as an egotistical child - encouraged by his rich parents and the kids constantly impressed by his showing off - but that changes when he obtains genuine friends and learns the value of real relationships.

Realizing that he'd relied only on what his parents had to make connections with people, Baxter doubts his own worth as a person and is unable to imagine that people would feel differently about him than he feels about himself.

Baxter falls out with his friends due to the age gap and not having time for each other, coming to the conclusion that he'd not done anything for them.

Under the belief that he has no inherent long-term value, Baxter goes on flings and seeks to create fun moments with people rather than anything that would require revealing more of himself than he feels is attractive to others; this has the side effect of making him highly critical of himself over even minor mistakes.

Baxter goes to Sunset Bird meets the MC, who (along with the MC's friends) makes him feel a sense that he might actually be someone important to others, which he then actively tries to convince himself out of due to fear of risks/the unknown.

After leaving the MC on no contact, Baxter continues to miss them, but feels like he would only bother them further if he saw them again even if it were just to apologize.

Baxter ends up seeing the MC again in his Step 4 and is confronted thusly by his unfading feelings. This leads him to try and maintain the distance he'd created in an attempt to protect himself, yet he's unable to keep himself from letting loose every now and then because it goes against what his heart wants to push the MC away.

Though horrified by the idea that what he'd done in the past might have been a mistake and preferring (at the start) to go on without knowing, Baxter ultimately reflects on his actions and acknowledges to himself why he's been doing what he's been doing, and that he doesn't want to let the MC go again without laying everything on the table.

[kayselyn-axe-the-third-goddamnit]

If parasites used to be eliotropes, now it's iops!)

Well, the release of Bestiale is just around the corner, and as a person who was waiting for it and was very upset with how this project looks now, I am going to express my opinion. I apologize in advance if my language is rude - I only have complaints and do not want to offend anyone. Also, in this post, not only the Bestiale series will be mentioned, but also other works by ankama, including animated series, games and comics.

Unfortunately, I do not have the opportunity to get acquainted with many of them now due to studies and health problems, so feel free to point out errors that may be in the text - I will be very grateful. And now - let's go!

Narrative plan:

🥇🥈🥉1) W12 races and favoritism among them;

🥊2) Iops characters;

❗3) What's the problem

🌊4) Bestiale;

🐉5) "Year of Osamodas";

🥇🥈🥉1) Races of the World of Twelve And favoritism among them;

The World of Twelve is a planet, a fantasy world where the events of all (with rare exceptions) stories of the krosmoz universe take place. This world is inhabited by people of many races/classes, which are revealed to varying degrees. Despite how Tot has recently abandoned the old canon and is having fun with fanfiction, I still suggest using marks that will indicate the degree to which we know about a particular race. (Important: the table is quite subjective and was compiled by me as an average consumer of content, so it does not claim to be absolutely accurate. I only write what I see.)

Marks: ❤️ = good, 💚 = not bad; 🩵 = little information, 🖤 = unknown / very little information;

Races:

1) Sadida ❤️;

2) Feca🖤;

3) Cra🩵;

4) Eniripsa🖤;

5) Osamodas🖤;

6) Sacrier 🖤;

7) Pandawa🖤;

8) Ecaflip💚;

9) Ouginak🖤;

10) Xelor🖤;

11) Iop🩵;

12) Enutrof🖤;

13) Zobal/Masqueraider🖤;

14) Foggernaut🩵;

15) Huppermage💚;

16) Rogue🖤;

17) Sram🖤;

18) Forgelance🩵;

19) Eliatropes and Eliotropes (formerly) ❤️;

20) Classless Humans 🖤;

21) Monsters and Others 🖤;

Even though we don't know much about Iop culture, they're literally everywhere because for some unknown reason Ankama loves them almost as much as Elia(o)tropes (Eliotropes were a waste of time and resources - are you ready for this conversation or not). Almost every project in the krosmoz universe has at least one Iop, and they look REALLY bad. I'll explain why I don't like them later, but first I'll give you a list of characters to back it up.

🥊2) Iop Characters;

When I say Iops are literally everywhere, I mean it. I want to point out that I haven't read the Dofus manga or the Ogrest manga, so I might be wrong in some places. I apologize in advance. Here's a list of Iop characters and roles, I think that's it:

1) Tristepin. Wakfu series (main characters), Wakfu manga (main characters), OVA (main characters), Waven (main characters). Also appears in other works as Iop God;

2) Goultard. Wakfu series (minor character), Waven (minor character), OVA (background character), Dofus Magna ( main characters), the protagonist of his own short film;

3) Eleley. Wakfu series (minor character), OVA (minor character), Wakfu manga (minor character), Waven* series (main character);

4) Pin. Wakfu series (minor character), Waven* series (main character);

5) Iop God . Wakfu (past incarnation of one of the main characters), Ogrest manga (minor character), Savara* (minor character or npc);

6) Khan. Dofus: Julith (minor character), Dofus mmorpg (npc), Welsh and Shedar* (minor character);

7) Bist. Lance Dur series (minor character), Lance Dur webtoon (minor character);

8) Karn. Bestiale* (main characters), Savara* (npc);

9) Savara. Savara* (main character);

*The featured animation/game product has not yet been released at the time of writing or has been abandoned;

As you can see, there are quite a few iops in important roles.

❗3) What's the problem

In short: iops are CtrlC+CtrlV dummies that the creators of the universe play with instead of developing the universe (the same goes for eliatropes/eliopropes).

With rare exceptions, all iops look something like this: proud, very strong, sometimes not particularly smart, fight well and love to do it. Of course, each of them will have some individual traits, but they all remain a set of the above qualities (with rare exceptions). I won't even talk about the design - it's decadence and boredom (especially hairstyles - most often they are LITERALLY THE SAME).

Iops, as a rule, are needed to please the viewer with their image and it works, but apart from their charm (I still don't understand why they are loved so much) they bring nothing else. No lore, no interesting information, which will tell us something new (besides the character itmself). I can forgive mistakes in creating a story, but I don't forgive monotony.

And it would seem: if so, then you can create a character of another race and start revealing other peoples. Give content for fans of another class that are part of your own audience too. Even if it was never the main goal of the show, it would be cool to have some variety even in small amounts, right? NO! Every time we get a red-headed goof created for crowd entertainment. What about the other races? I'm not interested in watching iops - I want to understand what the world of twelve is, we barely know anything about it! Have you even seen the official map of the world of twelve? There are a HUGE number of regions and places that you can ONLY learn something about if you play Dofus/Wakfu/ect.! Moreover, Ankama still creates new classes, but they do not get enough attention, only the basic minimum. What about the old ones? How much, for example, do we know about srams or zobals?

This universe has been around for ten years for sure, and I want to know more about it, about the others, not read another Tot fanfic about some silly-billy! Ankama. What. Is. This.

And don't get me wrong - I don't hate Iops, I actually like some of them. But they get TOO MUCH attention and because they bring so little new to the table, it's very hard to take Iops seriously. You just see wasted potential and every new character starts to irritate you.

Okay, I'm starting to get too angry, so let's move on. Sorry for the bombing.

🌊4) Bestiale;

Ugh, there will be a lot of complaining here too.

In fact, I didn't have any strong complaints about Karn's character until he was announced as the second main character. I don't mind him having having lots of fans' attention at all - let people enjoy what they like. But the creators of the show already give preference to him - he got the status of the main character, he is in the trailers, has some kind of biography, appears in the game and it is him, and not Yrehn, that we see in the videos advertising the series. Although there was no need for this. At all.

The main character herself appears only in the trailer and apart from the notes from the designer, we know nothing about her at all (well, she also has a special connection with Ilanthe, you could guess about it from the trailer, thanks). Are you serious?? I was expecting a cartoon about this girl saving her friend from a poacher, but it looks like they're making a cartoon about a POACHER guy who gets in the way of a teenage girl. I don't have any expectations for Bestiale, but as an osamodas fan, I was really looking forward to this series specifically because of Yrehn - and now she's being overshadowed by someone who used to only appear in an early poster. And I don't care if he's cool, a good father(yes, fatherhood doesn't mean anything, it's a cheap trick), and can cook - now I'm not going to like this character, even though his type's one of my favorites.

It would have been so much cooler if he stayed a villain (hello, i am a villain enjoyer) - but apparently Ankama lacks guts i guess. Plus, he would have been fresher and more interesting if he was a sacrier or a sram instead of the typical Iop. Remember the sacrier fight scenes? I think those two would have had so much more potential!

Anyway, I just hope Yrehn's arc doesn't get overshadowed. I'm really upset

🐉5) "Year of Osamodas";

And as a conclusion, I will add that this year Tot declared the year of Osamodas, deciding to start with a series where Yrehn (osamodas) shares the place of the main character with an iop, who is given so much attention that there is no budget left for the animation of the FIRST PROTAGONIST's tail. Oh, and there is also a whole game about iops coming out, where the main character is Karn's daughter, also an iop, obviously (but she also could be any other race since she's adopted) .Perhaps Yrehn will appear there. Happy year of Osamodas, thanks for your attention!))

(Sorry if it's too emotional or too many mistakes ,my English is not so good)

[loomluna]

I think this is the first reblog on this blog for me (and I think my first repost on my old account was also a Wil Wheaton post; I think it was just a reblog of super hero themed condoms), mostly to come back and reflect on this a while from now.

But also because I've been in what I've referred to as a reading rut since late 2019; it was strange but also emotional to me to see this person I look up to (I know, Wil Wheaton is a normal person, but monkey brain fire at connection) having gone through a similar experience at around a similar timeframe as me. My reading is still small and far in between, but last year I finally read Erin Morgenstern's 'The Night Circus' and 'The Starless Sea', Chuck Tingle's 'Camp Damascus' and 'Bury Your Gays', and 'The Full Moon Coffee Shop'. I've picked up and started on the 'Cells at Work' manga and rereading a childhood favorite 'The Secret Garden' and I've been 'reading' those for months now in sporadic moments when the want arises. Even now, looking at them as I write this there's a part of me wanting- wishing I wanted to pick them up; but I don't want to push myself. My love of books and reading will not return to a voracious appetite if I force myself. Like building back up my energy, like a great many other things in my life right now, I need to remember that progress is progress, no matter how small.

For anyone who actually reads this, to answer Wil's question of casting people in my head; I don't find myself doing that too too often, probably due to a different media mix I tend to do. I often find myself pairing specific albums with books or series. From doing so, certain songs tend to start to hold these scenes that my brain can perfectly paint from these books that are absolutely intertwined to me in a way no one will ever understand.

Spoiling of various books ahead:

When I first read 'The Hunger Games' series, I had just seen Wicked on stage for the first time; so I had the soundtrack on repeat as I read the books. One Short Day from wicked makes for a PERFECT montage scene of Katniss and Peeta arriving to the capital (although not always in such the cheery mood). when I first hear the first whispered "one short day in the Emerald City" I see this sprawling metropolis at dusk, streets filled, chariots lining the street and all that enormity is absolutely drowned out by these two figures burning in the last chariot.

The Maze Runner series was accompanied by Imagine Dragons' Night Visions. Hearing Demons still brings out a dark dreary monsoon of a rain, a smallish group of boys (and girl) being herded onto a school bus by some official looking adults. The kids are mostly moving pretty automatically, still in shock. When, more or less a zombie is spotted in the darkness of the rain. I can still feel the fear and shock and the "what comes next" that Thomas and the others were feeling somewhere deep in the vibrations of the song itself. (side note, I loaded up Night Visions to listen to some of the songs I haven't heard in years, and as soon as Bleeding out started I brain went "Theresa's betrayal", so there's that)

More recently, Porter Robinson's Nurture paired extremely well with Camp Damascus. For the sake of not spoiling a more recent release, I won't describe it out as I have the others, but Something Comforting makes me picture the ending of Camp Damascus, and I am always warmed by how hopeful Dr. Chuck Tingle and Porter Robinson have made me feel.

And the last one I will share is the beautiful scenes from the Starless Sea my brain creates from The Midnight's Endless Summer Album. Bend is the relationship between time and fate. Lonely City is the ancient sprawling city below, the honey seas starting to glisten below, the air somehow sweet yet salty, dark but always just luminescent enough to clearly make out what's around.

it's in a book

Starting around 2016, when the world started going to shit, I woke up one day to discover that I simply could not read a book, except for work. This is about how I found my way back to reading for my own pleasure.

I know I am not the only person who experienced this, yet I have struggled for years to find any kind of logical explanation for it, or actionable advice to address it. Starting around 2016, when the world started going to shit, I woke up one day to discover that I simply could not read a book. Or a magazine. Or a short story. Or more than a news item, blog post, or some intellectual empty…

[zahri-melitor]

With the way they keep writing Tim's exes as ultra supportive and say stuff like he was 'settling' before bernard and "steph was a reminder of how he avoided examining himself on purpose' and the way they don't give tim with steph any meaningful interactions anymore (unless it is about bernard) it seems clear to me they are trying to downplay his romance with steph (making him more or less gay in everything but name) and throw her under the bus in a way that is franky misogynistic and the way Ari was used in that manner applies as well

I honestly think you're all trying to see or prosecute ship wars in what is extremely routine behaviour in writing superhero comics.

These are long running franchises, characters in them have dated many people over the years, and it is extraordinarily common for a writer to promote the current relationship above previous ones.

I promise you, if you go read some other titles, you'll see writers doing this. Go read Tim Seeley's Nightwing run to see Dick telling both Babs and Kory that Shawn Tsang's just more important and special to him than his relationships with either of them. Go read how many, many Superman writers over the years have reframed Clark's feelings about Lana Lang.

Have you ever seen writers carrying on about Julie Madison as Bruce's 'first love'? Prior to Julie appearing in Scott Snyder's n52 run, she was offhandly referred to as this in Chris Yost's Red Robin run and Batman RIP, had appeared in Matt Wagner's retellings of the Monster Men and the Mad Monk stories in 2005-2008, and then realistically hadn't shown up outside of references in various Secret Origin stories since the 1970s, and then before THAT since the original handful of stories in the early 1940s.

I don't think they're trying to 'downplay' Steph's relationship with Tim, something that has been teased at and on and off in canon between 1992 and 2021 (that's THIRTY YEARS). Steph's relationship with Tim is something that comics will have to navigate for the rest of eternity, because even if both of them fully move on and end up as amiable coworkers who occasionally reflect back on it (see how Dick and Kory have generally been used even by supportive Titans writers over the last 30 years), it's still going to get mentioned.

You (generally) are annoyed because you like the character and/or the relationship more than the current one. And I get it. I've snorted at this behaviour in stories before and rolled my eyes. But by being obsessed with it and arguing about it being misogynistic, you're also reducing the worth of this female character down to whether or not a male character was 'truly' in love with them.

[darkfictionjude]

Okay so I know this is a touchy subject already especially since certain people have already been bitchy about it before, but sometimes Crowny is genuinely difficult to play as. I feel super conflicted about them since they're the literal personification of "damn bitch you live like this?"

Realistically, progress isn't linear and different people get different results even if they do the exact same thing, but as of now it feels like they aren't really allowed to improve at all. If you study you're still mediocre leaning towards bad in terms of understanding. You try to workout you see absolutely no results, not even the tiniest bit. When it comes to the other characters, it's always one step forward and two steps back. When you give them a hobby or try to get them to pick up a skill they find little enjoyment. When people bother them they barely fight back or even argue, and when they do it's like a sarcastic quip or a grumble at most. By the end, they haven't even made a dent. These don't make them less of a person and it doesn't make them a failure since the world is quite literally out to get them, but it's like they aren't allowed any satisfaction in their life. (Yeah it's been like a month, maybe barely scratching two in the current timeline so maybe this contradicts what I first said about progress but I'm dumb as hell)

It's wild to go from the side quests, backstory segments, interactions with the ROs and then Crown family just for all the hype to fade when there's a segment with just Crowny all alone. I know that there's a reason for why they are the way they are, but I literally have to take breaks from reading their solitary moments sometimes because it seems to drag on. I know things aren't easy in this universe, I know the world is supposed to be cruel and unfair, but like can they at least get a cake for their efforts? Or a hug? Or be able to sleep through one night and wake up well rested?

I hope I'm not sounding like an asshole or a insane here. Personally, they're relatable in a lot of aspects. I may not have had supernatural shit going after me, but I had a lot of issues that many of their experiences brush way too close to. It's just the way it's presented that makes them feel like they're like the random piece of chewy cartilage in an otherwise perfectly cooked steak, unpleasant but I'm gonna eat it anyway.

I literally just wrote a whole ass book complaining, but I at least wanna say I do love your work, Crowny included even if my words seem to say otherwise, and I'm super excited to see what happens in the timeskip since i know this is like JUST the beginning. I'm like seriously praying my tone is coming off the right way if that's even possible. If you read through all this thanks. I'm not gonna hide behind anon because I at least wanna be able to explain myself if this comes across wrong.

but like can they at least get a cake for their efforts? Or a hug? Or be able to sleep through one night and wake up well rested?

Well no 😭😭

And that comes from the fact that they are self loathing, depressed as hell and have virtually no support system while dealing with things that they aren’t mature enough to handle, actually their mental health is getting far worse which is by design

I feel like perhaps some readers have not realized just how depressed crowny is. All the things you described about them finding little enjoyment, etc., are key markers of major clinical depression

I feel also people did miss the fact that crowny kind of exploded in the library they didn’t shut up, they didn’t let it go which I think is a positive because this is the first time they’ve have enough to say “enough”

Sorry but I like my things slow burn 💀 that Halloween party is meant to be a breakthrough for them and I think perhaps it’s been glossed over by some because what happened to James has gotten the most attention and the final moment in the woods. Crowny outed their “friends” for the first ever and fought back against their tormentor in only one single night. James for all his issues did the one thing that broke the camel’s back and pushed Crowny over the edge, all 7 episodes have led to this

Crowny is meant to fall before they come up that’s how I wanted it because realistically someone could not handle all of this without losing their mind. It has barely been two months, Crowny has only seriously hit the main plot in episode 4 which in the current timeline was about 3 weeks ago (from episode 7)

Truly the progress that crowny did make in episode 7 should have taken longer, people with crowny’s issues spend years in therapy before they feel they have the right to fight back.

There’s a reason episode 7 is the midseason finale. It’s not only about the plot but about crowny themself….

Dw you’re tune is fine I can usually tell when someone doesn’t think before they write 😭

[eternallia]

𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐫𝐮𝐢𝐧𝐬, 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐞 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧 (𝐦)

albedo x fem!reader

➽ fandom: genshin impact

➽ genre: mild angst (with happy ending), eventual smut, eventual fluff

➽ summary: After a painful breakup, you haven’t been the same. He left you shattered, unable to move on—but Albedo was there. He wanted to help, and maybe, he could.

➽ tags & warnings: infidelity (not from albedo), explicit language, lots of alchemy stuff, slow burn, self-doubt, healing and self discovery, porn with plot (or more like plot with porn), smut: praising, teasing, breast play, cunnilungus, fingering, rough sex, pet names, unprotect sex, albedo changes when he has sex

➽ word count: 14k

note: after three years i finally wrote something again. sorry in advance, there's a lot of alchemy talk and stuff and i'm not an expert haha. still, i hope you like it!

The air in Dragonspine was frigid and biting, and the sound of the wind resonated with the walls of the campsite. Tears streaked down your cheeks, and they wouldn’t stop no matter how hard you tried. Months had passed since the truth came out, yet your heart refused to move on.

There was a time when you were the happiest. Every aspect of your life was in order, and all the time you spent working hard was finally rewarding you. That changed when a particular person disrupted your sense of self and brought chaos into your life.

You once felt loved, cherished, adored… It all crumbled when he confessed his lies and betrayal, and your world shattered.

So many women were his one and only, and only his sheets knew the depth of his deceits. He only confessed after his lover got pregnant and he had to wed her.

Months later, you looked at the mirror and wondered when you had let yourself go. You used to be perceptive; you were smart, and you never allowed feelings to cloud your thinking.

Yet, where had that perceptive side of you gone?

You couldn’t remember the moment when you became so naive. All those lies, the half-truths, the changes, and his sudden distance were now crystal clear to you. Even so, you didn’t notice them when they were happening. Why?

Your past self would have never made this dumb mistake. There was a reason you were one of the assistants of the Chief Alchemist and Captain of the Investigation of the Knights of Favonius. Working for him was the biggest honor and compliment towards you and your work performance since Albedo rarely allowed himself to spend time with people.

“Wake up, y/n.” You mumbled to yourself while you cleaned your wet cheeks with a handkerchief.

While reorganizing the mess you made on the desk, you came across the cause for your emotional breakdown: your ex’s letter. After admitting his betrayal, he begged you to forgive him and tried to convince you that you still could be together. There was no explanation as to why he thought that was possible, and despite your continuous rejections and refusals to see or talk to him, he wouldn’t give up.

That’s the reason why you had his letter. He delivered a letter every single day to your workplace. Days like today, when you would work in Dragonspine, he would make sure you got them one way or another. 

He had no shame. He lied, he cheated, and he took you for granted. Every single person in Mondstadt knew what he did to you, and he still had the audacity to beg for you to listen to him, to give him another chance.

You took the letter in your hands and read it one last time. Holding the letter over the candle’s flame, you watched the corner catch fire and begin to burn.

Wouldn’t it be good if the fire could burn your sadness too?

With one last look at the letter, you threw it away and let it burn. The wind would take care of the ashes, not you.

Albedo could arrive at any moment, and you needed to arrange the campsite so he could continue with his research. Moreover, you needed to fix yourself so he wouldn’t notice your emotional state. No matter how much trust you had in the chief, you will never forgive yourself if you disappoint him.

“Where did I leave my notebook?” You mumbled, deciding to finally focus on your job. 

Little did you know, Albedo had been watching you for a while. He had arrived some moments after you began crying and decided to wait until your emotional state improved before entering the campsite. He thought it would be best to not let his presence be known, but for some reason he remained close and observed how your inner turmoil destroyed your emotional stability.

He understood that tears were a response from the lacrimal glands, usually provoked by intense injuries or emotions. He noticed the redness surrounding your eyes, a clear indication that you had been crying. Albedo had known you for a long time, and he had never seen you display such behavior. As his assistant, you had experienced various injuries from experiments or attacks, yet none had affected you like this.

This wasn’t a reaction caused by an injury; this was a deep emotional wound.

Albedo has witnessed people consumed in sadness before, but your tears resonated with him more deeply. Is it because he truly cares about your well-being, or is it because of the rarity and discomfort of seeing you in such a vulnerable state?

You were his assistant, and along with Sucrose, you were the only one capable of working alongside him. Over the years, you have proved not only your amazing assisting skills but also that you were an outstanding alchemist. Sometimes, even Albedo was pleasantly surprised at your capabilities.

Even if you didn’t notice it, Albedo had a very high and positive opinion of you.

He wasn’t oblivious to the recent events in your personal life; every time he visited Mondstadt, he could hear the whispers of citizens who openly discussed the details of your ex’s affairs. And even if you tried to hide it from him, he understood how challenging it was for you to move on with your life.

You have always been capable, reliable, and diligent. To see you undone like this was beyond his comprehension. It unsettled him.

Moments after you finished cleaning your mess and arranging the tools and materials Albedo was going to use for today’s work, you heard footsteps approaching the campsite. 

You looked up and saw him walking toward you.

“Good morning.” He greeted nonchalantly, “I see you’re already at work.”

“Good morning, Mr. Albedo. I just finished organizing the materials.” You tried to not look at him so he wouldn’t see your eyes, but you just couldn’t hide yourself from him.

Albedo, the Chief Alchemist, was an enigmatic man, just what one would expect from someone in such a prestigious position. His teal eyes had a sharpness that seemed to see through everything and everyone, including you. He was precise, calm, and methodical—qualities you once found intimidating but now respected. Handsome too, in an almost otherworldly way. 

There was a time your eyes lingered a little too long on the curve of his smile, many years back. 

He was your mentor and colleague, the person you admire the most.

Still, you panicked when your eyes met. And you just knew he saw the redness in your eyes.

“Did something happen?” Albedo politely inquired as he walked towards his desk, searching for his research notebook.

“Oh, it’s nothing. I've just had a lot on my mind lately.” You said, attempting to deflect the question in hopes he wouldn’t press for more.

“I see.” Albedo acknowledged as he grabbed a pen to begin his notes. Though you couldn't see it, a faint show of concern was etched on his brow.

You let out a sigh of relief, hoping he wouldn't pry further. You weren’t sure if he didn’t notice your emotional state or just decided to ignore it, but you were grateful for the lack of comments.

Albedo observed what you had prepared on the alchemist’s table and looked over the notes of the experiment. Everything was properly organized and ready to use, just as always. The only difference was a barely visible wet patch, proof of your earlier cry. He thought the wisest thing to do would be to keep quiet about it.

“Let’s start with the samples of the Frostglaze Crystals; let’s see what kind of information we can discover by analyzing its components.”

“Understood, Mr. Albedo.”

And so you began your experiment of the day. Recently, a group of adventurers decided to participate in an expedition to the depths of The Chasm. There were doubts of their success, but they surprised everyone with their return. Some of the members of the expedition worked in the Investigation Team of The Knights of Favonius and gave many samples and materials to the team. As the chief, Albedo decided to do some research on some of them.

As the experiment progresses, you are in charge of measuring and checking the ingredients, taking notes of everything, and handing Albedo everything he needs. He ordered; you did it. He needed something; you delivered. It was a mechanical process you had already mastered in your years working at his side.

But it seemed like today wasn't your day.

You were nervous, and your mind occasionally wandered to memories of your ex or the contents of the letter he sent you today. For some reason, you had managed to help Albedo directly so he could focus on his task, but more than once you forgot to write down information about the experiment.

Focus, y/n. You need to focus.

The results of this experiment could be a chance to discover its original form, and with it, its origins. You couldn’t make any mistakes. 

So why did your mind keep remembering when your ex ventured to Dragonspine—without a vision—to bring you your bag of supplies you had forgotten in his house the night prior? His legs trembling, his rapid breathing, and his shocked expression after barely escaping from a Hilichurl. 

You had never felt so scared, but so taken care of at the same time. He seemed so devoted to you. He was so caring. But your heart broke a little more when you did the math and realized he was already lying to you that time.

With a wobbling lip and your vision clouding, you failed to see that you poured too much of the aetherial distillate in the flask, and it overflowed. The crystal-clear liquid fell onto the open bottle of Luminis Essence and provoked an uncontrollable emission of colored smoke. You involuntarily inhaled the smoke and felt a burning sensation in your nose that caused you to cough violently. 

You didn't even have time to react before Albedo quickly took control.

He neutralized the smoke by encapsulating the flask with geo crystals and moving it outside of the campsite. The remaining smoke quickly disappeared with the help of Dragonspine’s winds. 

“Mistakes happen. There’s nothing that can’t be fixed.” Albedo said in a calm tone, almost soothing, when he returned to the campsite.

Yet you didn’t believe it. What if that smoke put your health at risk? In all your years working as an alchemist, you have never messed up this bad. What was worse, you had never committed a mistake in front of Albedo, never. And now, you had luck; it was just smoke. What if it was an explosion? What would you have done if there had been an explosion? What would have happened if you had ruined the experiment?

This wasn’t like you.

There must be something wrong with you.

“I’m very sorry, Mr. Albedo…” Your voice was shaking, and your hands trembled. “I should’ve been more careful. I don’t know what happened. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.” Tears welling up in your eyes.

Albedo remained silent for a few seconds, which made you feel worse than you already did. Then he finally spoke.

“Perfection doesn’t exist, particularly in alchemy. Errors are not only unavoidable but also part of the process. And often, these so-called ‘mistakes’ produce extraordinary outcomes.” His voice was soft and comforting.

For a second time in the day, there were tears streaming down your cheeks. You wanted them to stop, to hide them from Albedo, but you couldn’t do it. The disappointment swelling in your chest was a reminder of your failures—to Albedo, to your work, and most importantly, to yourself.

“You’ve been going through a complicated period in your life; don’t blame yourself for being human.” Albedo reassured gently, but it did little to soothe your guilt.

You sobbed while hearing his words. Albedo stood by your side, offering consolation, and you found yourself torn between chastising yourself for needing his comfort and wholeheartedly enjoying it. Little did you know, those words were what you needed to hear.

“I’m so, so sorry.” You managed to say between sobs, your tears blurring Albedo’s face.

He remained silent. Albedo turned his back on you and began cleaning the workstation and conceded some time to yourself, which you spent trying to calm yourself down. His mind raced with thoughts about what had just happened and what he should do now. You have been struggling internally and keeping everything from him, which makes him cautious about what he says. For some reason, he dislikes the situation.

After what felt like an eternity, you finally managed to compose yourself. As Albedo meticulously organized and cleaned all the remains of the Frostglaze Crystal and your disaster, his movements were purposeful but silent.

“Why…?” You sniffled. Albedo raised his gaze to look at you. “Did I ruin the experiment?” You would never forgive yourself if you had done that.

“We will continue another time.” It was all he said about it, and before your mood soured once again, he continued. “There’s something more important we need to do, and I need your assistance.”

Confused, you approached the desk in which Albedo was placing some papers with some sketches and notes. You haven’t heard anything from him about a new research or experiment. In fact, you usually were the one who managed those things. Perhaps Albedo forgot to mention this experiment to you.

Albedo’s eyes glinted with excitement as he declared, “There’s an idea I had for a few months that I would like to develop.” Albedo glanced up from the desk that was now full of papers filled with different types of information and drawings.

“I want to create a new catalyst.” He continued. You inhaled sharply at what he said, astonished at what he said, but remained quiet and let him continue. “One that draws elemental energy more efficiently to the wielder. To achieve this, we must conduct extensive research, find the proper materials, and fully understand the science behind elemental flow.”

Albedo revealed his notes scattered across the desk, showcasing various minerals, metals, gems, and sketches of potential catalysts. It was one of the most ambitious ideas you had ever encountered.

It was no secret that Albedo was an ambitious man when talking about alchemy and what he desired to discover. Although the main goal for his continuous research remained a mystery, he always sought to uncover every single thing in Teyvat in order to find the truth he so desperately wanted.

However, creating a catalyst, an object whose mechanism was already well-defined, was not something you ever anticipated to do in your time as Albedo’s assistant.

No matter how you reacted to this situation, you were sure you did it wrong.

“That’s where you come in.” Albedo declared, his eyes still looking at you. 

You blinked in surprise, unsure if you had heard correctly. 

“What do you mean by that…?” Your voice faltered. There was no way he would want you in such a challenging project; you must have misinterpreted what he said. 

“I have worked alongside you long enough to see your capabilities and conclude your skills will be invaluable for this project.” He explained, his expression serene, contrasting sharply with your racing heart.

“You must be mistaken… Just a few minutes ago I was one substance away from creating a hazard.” He must have forgotten; it would explain why he was asking you this.

Albedo frowned at your words, and you almost regretted what you said. “I don’t appreciate the suggestion that I’m wrong when I’m not.” He said firmly. “I wouldn’t have invited you to participate if I didn’t believe in your abilities.” His gaze was unwavering. 

“I—” It was difficult to articulate an answer after that. “I’m sorry.”

You weren’t sure if your poor apology was directed to his words or to the lack of an appropriate answer.

However, could he really ignore your previous error and the disappointing performance you had in the past months? Although today was the first time you were at fault for committing such a mistake, you were sure you had been working poorly in comparison to the months prior to your breakup. Even though he kept quiet about it, you knew he noticed.

In your current state, it was difficult for you to understand why he had such a high opinion of you. If he needed support, Sucrose would be a much better option. Despite both of you being Albedo’s assistants, you took on a more administrative role while she often shared the same curiosity to experiment like Albedo did.

Albedo looked at you as you directed your gaze to the floor, shoulders slumped and fingers fidgeting. He closed his eyes for a brief moment, regretting his words.

Albedo took the sketch of an already existing catalyst and showed it to you. “This would be our starting point. We are not looking to create a catalyst from zero but a new type that is capable of enhancing the energy output and, if possible, autonomy. Alchemy should make it more efficient for the wielder’s elemental power.” 

It made sense to you. Creating a catalyst wouldn’t achieve anything besides a self-sense of accomplishment for understanding the mechanisms it had to function as a channel of elemental energy. Albedo’s purpose for this project would be to improve the already existing mechanisms for better performance or, ambitiously, infuse autonomous abilities.

“Exactly.” Albedo agreed with a subtle smirk. The sudden sound of his voice startled you; you didn’t notice you were speaking out loud.

You felt your cheeks heat up at the satisfied look Albedo gave you.

“Have you started this project already? Do you have a concept model?” 

“No, all of this here is already existing information of other catalysts and materials used for their fabrication. The idea I shared with you is something I had in my mind; maybe I have some notes in my notebook but nothing else.”

You hummed in response. Perhaps that was the reason why you hadn’t heard about this before.

You walked towards the desk to look at the information gathered. Crystal cores would help to stabilize the energy source, and the Cor Lapis could work as a solid base of the structure.

“The Whopperflower Nectar could help as an organic conductor of energy flow.” Albedo suggested while handing you a paper full of descriptions of the priorities of the nectar. 

You leaned in to grab the paper, and your shoulders brushed Albedo’s arm. Both of you noticed but remained quiet and continued discussing the possible components of the catalyst.

“So… What do you think?” Albedo asked. He meant if you were going to participate in this project. 

You were nervous, and there was a small amount of fear of you failing again. Due to the lies you discovered about your past relationship months after they happened, you didn’t trust yourself the way you used to. As a researcher, it hit you hard knowing you were incapable of figuring out the deceptions of your ex. Even though your job and your personal life were not related, you still view your situation as a consequence of your own uselessness.

Still, this project awakened something in you you hadn’t felt in a long time. Eagerness. 

You hesitated, a little unsure about your answer. “It sounds…challenging.”

“That’s the point. We’ll work through it together.” He encouraged; his eyes gleamed with excitement.

After a few seconds of silence, you finally nodded. “All right, let’s do it.” Your heartbeat drummed loudly.

For the past few days, you had been working on the project of designing a catalyst with Albedo. It seemed inefficient to continue working at the campsite in Dragonspine. It was Albedo’s favorite location to do his research since it provided the commodity only the lack of people could offer: quietude. However, for a project that promised extensive research and long work hours, constantly traveling to Dragonspine would be too tiresome and time-consuming.

As a result, Albedo and you settled in working in one of the alchemy labs inside of the Knights of Favonius Headquarters. It was the Chief Alchemist’s personal lab, one of the perks Albedo had as the chief. It was a big room, with bookshelves lined with tomes and research notes, a massive central worktable with a cauldron in the center, and some vials and scrolls.

The room was full of useful tools such as tubes, glass beakers, mortars, and pestles on every single surface you could see. However, you could still see Albedo’s influence in the lab. There were sketches pinned on the walls, some of formulas, others of Mondstadt and Dragonspine’ landscapes. You could even see some small wooden figurines in some corners.

As you progressed in your project, the space cluttered with the results of your research. Despite your excitement about the possibility of holding the end result of your work, there were steps that needed to be followed in order to achieve your final goal. First, you needed to conclude the theoretical outline of the catalyst. You were also doing some rough sketches and deciding the components it will have.

Over the course of this first step, your eagerness to work on the project grew each day, a rare spark of excitement that felt different from any other research. Yet, there was a lingering uncertainty that clung to you. Every time you made a move, you questioned yourself if you were truly capable of doing this. And no matter how much you wanted to believe otherwise, the hesitation never fully faded.

“Could you show the research log, please?” Albedo asked and extended his hand to you, waiting for it while his eyes were busy reading a scroll.

“Of course, here it is.” 

Knights of Favonius Alchemical Research Log

Project Lead: Albedo

Research Assistant: Y/N

Project Title: Development of an Advanced Alchemical Catalyst

Lab Location: Knights of Favonius HQ—Alchemy Division

1. Research Objective

To create a catalyst infused with stabilized alchemical energy to enhance elemental control and efficiency.

To ensure the catalyst is safe, durable, and responsive to the wielder’s energy signature.

The following was a record of all the important information needed to proceed successfully with this research. Albedo put you in charge of documenting everything that will be fundamental for this, so you had been doing an exhausting research of all the materials and methods to use, hypothesizing the results, and substantiating the theory behind your project.

Albedo took the log from your hands. At some points of the day, he would read what you added to it and add his opinions.

“Looks good.” He acknowledged while returning you the log. “What did you gather about the materials to use for the core and frame?” 

“It seems that Noctilucous Jade, Crystal Marrow, and Cor Lapis are the best initial candidates, but we still need to test them.” 

“Explain.”

“The Noctilucous Jade reacts to elemental energy and has the potential to stabilize it, the Crystal Marrow increases the strength and toughness of metals, and the Cor Lapis could offer reinforcement to the frame due to its durability.” 

Something that once was like a conversation between Albedo and you now made you feel apprehensive. There was this fear of forgetting what you were supposed to say or confusing the different answers in your head. Albedo was an expert alchemist; he could notice if you mistook condensate with concentrate.

If the questions become more difficult, would you be able to answer them?

“Where are the samples for the tests?” He raised his gaze and looked directly at you, his teal eyes making you nervous.

“I already requested them to be deliv…”

You couldn’t finish your sentence before the door creaked open, and a familiar voice hesitated at the entrance.

“Mr. Albedo? I have the materials you requested.”

Sucrose stepped inside, carefully balancing a wooden crate in her arms. There was a faint scent of minerals and damp stone along with a glow coming from the bottom of the crate. 

“Sucrose! Perfect timing, thank you so much.” You ran to help her and grabbed the crate to leave it on the central table, next to the log you recently reviewed with Albedo.

“It's nothing. Please let me know if you need anything else; I’m glad to help.” She smiled at you and then handed you the list of materials you ordered in Albedo’s name. You peered inside and made sure all of them were in the crate before signing the list and returning it to her.

Sucrose adjusted her glasses. “Will you be synthesizing these components right away?”

Albedo hummed in thought. “Not immediately; we still need to test them in specific conditions. I expect a few adjustments before reaching anything stable.”

Sucrose nodded, her expression filled with quiet admiration. “Understood. Let me know if you need assistance.” With a final glance at you and an encouraging thumbs up, she excused herself and exited the lab.

Albedo then turned to you. “Shall we begin?”

Four weeks had passed since the start of the catalyst project. The lab was filled with notes, half-finished sketches, and an assortment of materials.

At this point you were basically living in the lab, only leaving at late hours of the night to go home to eat, shower, and sleep before returning in the morning after the same routine to the lab. Every day was a challenge. Once you got results or figured something out, a new problem appeared. You knew you were progressing fast compared to other alchemists, but every bump on the way felt like a mountain you had to climb in order to reach the other side.

Frustration crept in; after three days of being stuck on the same obstacle, you were slowly losing confidence. The repeated failures were taking a toll on your spirit. The eagerness and excitement you had at the beginning were slowly fading away. Your fingers tremble as you try to get the catalyst’s core mechanism to stabilize the flow of elemental energy, but it keeps flickering due to its instability. 

You watch as the experiment fails… Again.

You can’t even manage a basic stabilization. Without it, you wouldn’t be able to continue with the rest of the steps.

No wonder he said you weren’t enough. 

The memory of your ex resurfaced, and the shadow of his words loomed over you. His voice echoed in your ears, forcing you to remember his excuses when you begged him to tell you why he looked for others, why you weren’t enough for him.

You could feel your eyes stinging with unshed tears. Maybe he was right; maybe you weren't enough. For him, for your work, for your chief… You weren’t good enough for you. 

“How is the stabilization going?” Albedo steps in, startling you and almost making you drop the experimental sample. You were so distracted with your inner thoughts that you didn't notice his presence.

He leans in, your shoulders brushing, and starts to examine the core mechanism and grabs it to look at it better. You are nervous, and some worry starts to set in as you look at how concentrated he seems. The self-deprecating remarks faded at Albedo’s calming presence. In these weeks working alongside him, you have become closer and more relaxed with him.

“What if the problem isn’t with the materials but rather with the energy flow?” Albedo suggested.

Why are the materials not the problem?

After the various rounds of tests to identify the most compatible and efficient materials to design the core mechanism, you knew they were perfect conductors of energy. If they weren’t, the core mechanism wouldn’t work at all. No flickering and no surging. So, in reality, the properties and refinement of the materials are perfectly adequate.

Why is the energy flow the solution?

The reasoning behind energy flow is that energy must travel through the right pathways to work efficiently. When talking about catalysts, they must direct and regulate their internal energy properly.

Then, what if the instability is caused by an imbalance in the pathways of the energy flow? You almost jumped from your seat to grab the blueprint and revisit the structure of the mechanism.

Imbalance.

An imbalance in the pathways…

There it is! You almost scream in delight when you finally see that there’s a misalignment in the channels causing an overload in one of the sections and a shortage in another. You quickly but carefully adjust the placement of the elemental core, shifting it by a few degrees to align with the pathways. 

You were almost done; only the refinement was missing. You grabbed the engraving tool tightly, your pulse quickening. This was going to be difficult, but you knew you could do it. You adjusted the grooves, scraping away excess material and redrawing key lines, hoping to direct the flow more evenly.

For a moment, nothing changed.

Then, finally, the movement steadied, and it glowed, the energy moving smoothly through the patterns. You exhaled, tension still lingering in your shoulders, but relief washing over you. 

“It’s working.” You wanted to cry, but this time in happiness. You did it. 

Albedo’s hand came to rest on your head, his fingers pressing lightly in a quiet gesture of acknowledgment before pulling away. “Well done.” He smiled, and a strange warmth bloomed in your chest; you returned the smile.

You were capable of solving this.

You were good enough.

The once-busy corridors of the HQ were now quiet, the usual chatter replaced with the occasional echo of the few knights who remained in the building. It was late at night; the laboratory’s light was now dim. You were exhausted after a long day working on the catalyst’s experimental sample.

After completing the core mechanism successfully, you spent several weeks finalizing the design and gathering the materials for the first assembly of a non-functional model. Before making the experimental prototype, you needed to test the physical form of the catalyst. Fortunately, the complications were minimal, and the progress was advancing smoothly.

Despite your exhaustion, you felt a sense of accomplishment after all your hard work. Some doubt occasionally crept in, but you focused on something else, and you forgot about it. After all, Albedo was happy with the direction the project had taken and reassured you it was because of your work. 

“I believe it’s getting late; we should wrap up for the day.” Albedo let out a tired breath as he put his pen down, rubbing his temple with his fingers. There was a heaviness in his movements, showing his weariness after a long day.

You noticed the drop of his shoulders and the way his eyes lingered on the mess on his desk; it seemed he had no energy to arrange anything. His blonde hair was even messier than any other day, some strands falling across his forehead. At some point he had taken his white coat off, revealing the dark fabric clinging to his body and making it hard to ignore how well it fitted him. Without his coat, he looked more relaxed and comfortable.

When your eyes met his, there was something different in the way you looked at each other. You weren’t sure if it was for the tiredness, the closeness, or the lack of contact with other people, but you wondered if you had ever truly looked at him before.

“I will make sure to arrange the place, Mr. Albedo. You can leave for the day.” You diverted your look to the mess on the desk. Even if you were exhausted, he looked weary too, and you could offer help.

“No, I will help you.” He informed you as he began organizing his things.

“There’s no need; I know you need some rest.”

The look he gave you indicated he thought you needed one too, and you felt your cheeks burn in embarrassment. You didn’t want to look at yourself in the mirror, but you knew there were bags under your eyes, a mess in your hair, and traces of dirt on your clothes.

“If we both help, we can leave earlier. Besides, it’s getting darker, and I don’t want you to walk to your house alone. I will accompany you.”

You blinked, caught off guard at his offer. Even if it wasn’t common, there had been instances when you had to walk home late and he didn’t offer to join you, but it was true this was the first time it was so late. Although Mondstadt was a rather safe city, there was still some danger lurking around.

“Oh, but you don’t have to…” But the way he tilts his head, as if the thought of not walking you home never even occurred to him, makes you trail off. Your heartbeat stumbles slightly. "...Alright."

After some time, you leave the Knights of Favonius HQ with Albedo by your side. The night air was cool and crisp, and the quiet atmosphere made you more aware of the sounds of the wind and low talk from the awoken citizens. 

As you walk side by side, there’s a natural closeness between the two. These two months you have spent together working on the catalyst have forced the two of you to work in a reduced space for long hours of the day, making you interact in ways you hadn’t done before. There was more small talk than before; you laughed at the jokes Albedo occasionally said, he would reassure you every time you felt overwhelmed, and he would guide you when he noticed you were stuck in a dilemma.

With how busy you two were, it was not rare you just realized how your relationship had grown. A faint smile appeared on your lips at the thought of getting close to someone else again.

“You seem happy.” Albedo acknowledges, his eyes on you. Despite the lack of light, he noticed the content expression on your face.

“I just… I’m very honored you asked me to join you in this project; I never thought we would achieve so much.” It was true, the initial doubts you had in Albedo’s decision to help him were still there, but this has been one of the best experiences you had as an alchemist.

“My opinion still stands; you are the only one capable of doing this with me, and I was correct. Just a glance at the log and you can see how much you have contributed to it.” His words produced a warm sensation in you, delighted that someone like Albedo recognized your capabilities and effort.

“I still want to thank you.” As you walk, the moonlight suddenly makes you feel sentimental. “I used to think I could do anything as long as I had someone there for me, but then, when I had no one, I realized how wrong that was.”

There was a time you trusted your ex to be there every time you needed it. So, when he wasn’t there to hold you anymore, you fell.

“I’m finally learning that, even if there’s a sense of emptiness in my chest, I can support myself.” You hoped one day that emptiness would leave, but for the meantime, you were retaking control of yourself. “And I believe the opportunity you gave me helped me to realize that. So, thank you.”

You had arrived at your house. Both of you stood outside, facing each other. You hadn’t realized how close you were standing until now. The dim light of the moon cast a faint glow on Albedo’s face, highlighting the sharp contours of his face. His gaze, unreadable, rested on you.

Your heart stuttered. 

It wasn’t just the way he looked at you, but also the weight his eyes had on you. As if seeing something you still didn’t know. The space between the two felt smaller every second, almost allowing you to hear the sound of his breathing.

“You did that by yourself; I will not take any credit from it.” Even if his voice was very low, it was loud in your ears.

You swallowed, suddenly too aware of how his eyes flickered over your face, as if looking for something. He lifted his hand, his fingers brushing lightly against your skin. The touch was barely there; yet, it was enough to make your breath hitch. Maybe it was you, but you felt his touch lingering for a second too long.

“...There was dust here.” He murmured, his voice quieter than usual.

Suddenly, you were hyperaware of everything he did. You glanced up; he was calm, focused, and heavier. A hint of a smirk emerged, and your pulse fluttered.

“Rest well; I will see you tomorrow.” 

And as you watch him leave, you are left with a flood of emotions, wondering what happened. Unsure of where this is leading to, at least you were sure something shifted in your relationship with Albedo.

The shadow of your past was slowly fading.

It had been a week since the day Albedo took you to your home. Thankfully, the following days were as usual; you two were busy working on completing the experimental sample, and you were close to finding the right structure. However, you were unable to ignore how that moment you shared some nights ago had shaken the way you saw and interacted with him. 

Your eyes now lingered too long on his movements; his eyes made you rethink what you were saying, and his smile drew your gaze to it. There was no stopping the little jump your heart did whenever his shoulders brushed yours, and you were worried about what this could mean to you.

The inner struggle you were having was making your head spin, and having to see and interact with Albedo most of the day was not helping. As a result, you decided to go out after finishing today’s work and go have dinner with one of the closest friends you had: Lisa, the Librarian of the Knights of Favonius. 

It was an interesting relationship the two of you shared; she was like an older sister. She was much older than you, in a way that made you feel she had lived more than what she looked, but regardless of that, she had been one of your biggest supporters since you joined the Knights of Favonius. 

Currently, you were waiting for Lisa at one of the tables at Good Hunter. Although it was night, the city was illuminated with the soft light of the lanterns. Its glow cast a golden pool of light over the restaurant, giving it a sense of warmth and making the night feel less lonely and more cozy.

You were lost in thought, staring at the candle on your table, absentmindedly circling with your finger the candle holder.

“Darling, unless you’ve obtained a pyro vision, I’d say that poor candle has endured enough of your longing stares.”

Lisa slid into the seat in front of you, propping an elbow on the table as she studied you with knowing eyes. There is nothing you can hide from her, and you shouldn’t even try to.

“What’s on your mind? And don’t say ‘nothing’; you’re far too deep in thought for that.” She warned and sent a wink towards Sara, the waitress, who chuckled and began preparing the food Lisa usually orders.

“Do you tend to order by winking instead of talking?” You made fun of her, and she raised her eyebrow at you.

“Believe me, cutie, a wink at the correct moment will get you anything.” You laughed at what she confidently said. “Go on, spill. You know I’m much better company than that flame.”

And so, you did. It wasn’t easy to admit what was going on in your mind as you felt embarrassed at the situation you were in, but Lisa had something that made you feel confident with her. The only downside is that you were not leaving this table without some teasing from her part. And at some point, Sara served you your food, and you both ate as you spoke.

“I see… So, you’re working late nights with the ever-enigmatic Chief Alchemist; he walks you home like a true gentleman, and now you find yourself thinking about him at odd hours? My, my, whatever could that mean?” Lisa smirked teasingly after you finished talking as she poked at her food with her fork.

“Don’t say it like that.” Your skin burned with embarrassment; she wasn’t going to let you off easily any time soon.

“He’s quite easy on the eyes, don’t you think so?” She provoked you, knowing damn well you agree with her. His handsome looks were something you noticed from the moment you met him; you just were more aware of it now.

“He is…” You shyly admitted. “But that doesn’t mean there’s something else; we just have gotten closer the last few months with all our work.” Lisa giggled at your poor attempts to excuse your feelings.

“Cutie, you can insist nothing’s happening all you want. But the way your eyes have a spark when you talk about him? That tells me everything.” Her gaze softens on you.

“It’s just complicated, Lisa.” You let out an exhausted sigh, your back resting against the chair. 

“Is it really?”

“No… Mr. Albedo is certainly an attractive man, but this is not about that. We have spent too much time together because of the project; it’s natural that I… I don’t know; notice things about him.” 

That was what you wanted to believe; these emotions you were feeling were just the effects of work overload and your proximity. In all the time you had worked as Albedo’s assistant, you were never under these conditions; that was the only explanation. Besides, there was a lingering thought at the back of your mind, and you couldn’t yet dare to bring it out.

“Besides, he’s my superior. It would be completely inappropriate for me to think of him in any other way.” That was another issue you couldn’t ignore; you were his assistant. How could you even think of him in an unprofessional way?

Lisa’s eyes sparkled with mirth at your words. “Ah, so that’s what is bothering you? The forbidden nature of it all?” She smirks, but before you can say anything, she continues. “I know what you think, darling, but is this really about your roles? Do you think that in the free city of Mondstadt, your dynamic as chief and assistant creates an invisible barrier between you two?” 

“I—I don’t…” You couldn’t answer truthfully because Lisa was slowly pushing away every one of your excuses.

“There are many scholars and knights who worked under someone they admired and then began a not-so-professional relationship with them, you know? And no one had a problem with that; there are many examples in the city.” 

She didn’t lie; no one batted an eye at those types of relationships. This wasn’t just about your growing awareness toward Albedo’s looks or touches; it was something deeper you didn’t want to admit. Yet, you had to. Because only by facing the truth would you move on.

You let out a sigh, deciding to finally tell her the real reason. “I guess I’m scared of what I’m feeling.”

The wounds of your past continued to make you doubt. Every day it was easier to deal with them as they were slowly vanishing from your mind. However, there was a wound you couldn’t get over, as someone you once trusted and loved left scars deep inside of you that made it difficult to see someone else as nothing more than friends. 

Lisa gave you a soft and understanding look. “Oh, sweetheart. You’re hesitant, and that’s understandable. This is new, unexpected, and maybe you don’t feel ready. You’ve been through a lot, but don’t let the past decide how you feel about your present.”

You knew she was right. Only by letting the past stay in the past would you move on. Still, it was complicated; your ex was someone who caused more harm than good. Leaving him in your past was not easy.

“Has he left you alone?” She asked curiously; she knew how he refused to leave you alone. 

“He keeps sending me occasional letters, but he doesn’t try to see me anymore. To be honest, I have been too busy to notice when he comes.” The last time you heard anything about him was four days ago when a knight notified you that you had received a letter, but you didn’t even accept it, telling him to throw it away.

“Mmm, maybe he is finally giving up?” 

The possibility of that was low, but it would bring great relief to your life and your feelings. It had been like seven months since you ended your relationship with him; it was time for him to realize you didn’t want anything to do with him anymore.

As you wondered if you would finally be free of him, Lisa’s gaze drifted past you, her expression shifting just lightly. Her eyes dimmed, and her previous expression was replaced by something more calculating. 

“Oh, darling. What a shame we live in such a small city.” She murmured, lifting her drink and taking a small sip.

She didn’t have to say anything to know what she meant. You turned your head and saw the last thing you wanted to see. Your ex was approaching the restaurant with his now wife next to him and his baby in her arms. They didn’t look like a lovey-dovey couple, but there was a proximity between them that wasn’t there the last time you saw them, many months ago.

It seemed like they didn’t notice you were there, as you weren’t the only ones in the restaurant, but once they were too close, he finally saw you. His eyes initially passed over you, not recognizing you at first, but something made him look again. His posture shifts, shoulders tightening as he looks away a little too fast. 

A mocking chuckle leaves your mouth, and Lisa looks surprised at that, but how could you not laugh when his reaction is so different from seeing you when he's with his new family? Before, he would almost cry, go after you, and just look at you with clear sadness and regret in his eyes. Now, he clearly looked uncomfortable.

Like Lisa said, has he finally given up? Or is it the guilt of showcasing his new relationship in front of his ex?

“I don’t get it; Albedo is much more pleasant to see than him. Besides, he is rather charming in his own way.” Lisa compared Albedo with your ex, clearly wanting to lighten the mood. 

Her words made you think. Your ex was by no means an unattractive man. After all, there was a reason for how he had many women enchanted over him behind your back. He had his brown hair neatly styled, and his honey-colored eyes carried a certain charm. He was of a strong build, not overly muscular but well-proportioned. Overall, he was the kind of person who looks effortlessly put together.

However, Lisa was right. The first time you saw him, you remember thinking he looked inhumanly beautiful. His platinum-blond hair catches the light of the sun, his teal eyes drown you without effort, and his light skin is smooth. His presence was impossible to ignore as his beauty was delicate yet arresting. He was ethereal. 

“It doesn’t bother me…” Was what you said after remaining quiet for a few seconds? Your thoughts had drifted away after thinking of the situation. 

You were no longer staring at your ex, deciding to ignore them and focus on how you felt about the situation. You saw him, and for a moment you felt the heartbreak, the self-doubt, the nights wondering if you were ever enough for him. But as he stood there, you saw a stranger; there was no longing, no anger, and no resentment. The only thing you felt was the weight of his actions, which harmed the way you saw yourself. 

That’s what it hurts. You didn’t suffer for losing him, but you did because you lost yourself in the process. 

“You’re right, Lisa… Albedo is much more interesting than him.” You jokingly said, refusing to give more attention to the new and happy family behind you and eating the food from your plate. 

And as you refused to acknowledge them anymore, they stood there, unable to get closer to the restaurant they had decided to have dinner to have one of their weekly ‘bonding moments.’. That’s how the father of the wife said to force them to present their newlywed status.

Lisa saw everything. The way their eyes looked at you, one with yearning and guilt and the other with anger and envy. The innocent baby is asleep, ignorant of everything. And in a moment you were too distracted to notice, she mischievously grinned and pointed out for them to leave.

And they did so without complaining.

As the night progressed, Lisa kept asking and teasing you, more interested in encouraging you to acknowledge your growing feelings for Albedo. Making sure the topic of your ex remains buried in the past. 

Every day you were closer to the ending of the catalyst project. The lab was a mess; there were papers scattered across the table, pieces of the different parts of the catalyst, and some of the tools had fallen to the ground. The experimental sample was completed, Albedo designed a perfect model for the catalyst, and you analyzed the components and structure to do the final adjustments. With the completion of that, you could move on to the experimental prototype. 

This was the first example of how the catalyst was going to be, and it’s where you were going to test everything you did until this point. 

It was an unpredictable phase; you had already discovered some failures and mistakes you previously did in the construction of the parts, but the prototype was working. Unstable, but working. 

Your fingers ached, but you barely noticed—or cared. The last few days were blurry in your mind; you had spent hours bent over work, scribbling and rewriting. You barely registered; you hadn’t eaten much in the day, and it was only when Albedo reminded you that you dedicated some time to eat.

There was no time to waste; the project had to be completed, and you were so close to completing it.

As you struggled to piece together a solution for the overheating issue, you didn’t notice how Albedo’s fingers brushed over the tools and papers scattered on the table, subtly organizing them in a way that made it easier for you to use them. You also didn’t see how Albedo pushed a paper with some information about heat dissipation mechanisms, too engrossed in your task.

“That’s not how you do it.” You exhaled sharply, rolling your shoulders back. 

Maybe if you placed some conduits, it would redirect the heat to secondary components that can handle higher temperatures. You grabbed the paper Albedo discreetly handed and confirmed it could be a solution. 

You barely registered the way Albedo leaned against the desk next to you, arms crossed and his eyes watching intently what you were doing. You noticed how the candlelight softened his features, a stark contrast to the usual sharpness he carried. 

However, there was no time to think about it. If you start to think about him, it is going to be difficult to focus again. Right now, you couldn’t distract yourself.

It was complicated to explain how and when you had taken control of the catalyst project; in fact, you didn’t remember. Yet, you knew two things: doing this was making you feel like an alchemist again, and you wanted to prove to yourself—and Albedo—you could be one.

And when you tested the results of adjusting the temperature conduits and succeeded in fixing the overheating problem, you knew you couldn’t stop. 

No matter how exhausted you were, this was a test for you to see what you were capable of. And you were determined to win.

Something was missing. 

The catalyst was technically completed. Of course, the only stage left was the tests with the help of the vision-holders. However, when you observed the catalyst to see if everything was done, you couldn’t shake the feeling that it needed something else.

The reinforcement was done, the fine-tuning too; you double-checked everything and didn't find any errors. As you traced your fingers on its surface, you wondered what it was missing. And when you reached the middle of the catalyst and saw the blank and smooth surface, you knew what it was.

With steady hands you grabbed the rune carver and engraved the constellation of Aries. Just a little but meaningful touch for you. When the engraving begins glowing, you exhale in relief.

The prototype was, as you knew, completed. Now, it feels complete. 

Hearing footsteps approaching, you turned around and saw Albedo, his eyes fixed on the completed prototype of the catalyst and observing every detail. Your heart was pounding in your chest, anxiety beginning to creep up. His gaze then turned towards you, and as your breath hitched, he grinned brightly, and his eyes shone with something inexplicable.

He placed his hand on your shoulder and spoke. “You did it, congratulations.”

“No! Thank you, Mr. Albedo.” You were flustered; for a moment, you forgot this was Albedo’s research project.

“Mmm, why are you thanking me?” His grin turned into a full smirk, and you suddenly had the feeling he knew something that you didn’t.

“Because this is your project?” There was confusion in your voice as you watched him hide a laugh. “So, I appreciate you letting me work with you on this. It was an incredible experience.” And it was, you were incredibly thankful.

“Was it?” He took a step back and perched on the edge of the table, crossing his arms.

“Yes?” 

“This was my idea, yes… However, is it correct to call it my catalyst project?” He asked you, challenging you to decipher the meaning behind his words.

You were utterly bewildered. 

This was Albedo’s research project; he presented the idea of creating a catalyst enhanced with alchemical procedures, and you worked alongside him to complete it. Whatever Albedo was saying, you still didn’t get it.

Albedo chuckled at your expression, grabbed a pile of documents, and handed them to you.

It was the research log. As you flipped through the pages, looking for what you were supposed to find out, something caught your eye. 

Knights of Favonius Alchemical Research Log

Project Leader: Y/N

Research Assistant: Albedo

Project Title: Development of an Advanced Alchemical Catalyst

Lab Location: Knights of Favonius HQ—Alchemy Division

Your name. Not longer under research assistant, but under project leader. You read it again, thinking it was a mistake. When the project began, you remember writing it down with Albedo as the leader and you as the assistant. But no, the roles were, in fact, inverted. Your name held the title of leader of the research, while Albedo’s was listed beneath yours as the assistant.

And suddenly, you realized what he was trying to tell you. You thought back to every moment you had taken control of the research and every time Albedo stepped back to allow you to take control. At one point, he stopped instructing you and just guided you when you needed it. The hints had been there, but you had been too deep in the work to notice it. And as you skimmed through the pages, you saw how Albedo had annotated every record of the research after you—without noticing—stopped annotating.

Your hands tightened around the log, and you felt like tears would come out at any moment. 

This was never his project to complete. It was yours. 

You lifted your gaze to Albedo, who watched you with quiet satisfaction, as if he had been waiting for you to see it for yourself. 

“Congratulations for your hard work, Project Leader.” His smile turned soft as he watched the emotions in your eyes. 

A tear slipped down your cheek, and Albedo’s eyes followed it as it fell. As you reached to wipe it away, you noticed the tremble in your fingers.You were still processing everything—the completion of your work and the weight of your journey—when something warm brushed against your skin. 

Albedo’s thumb, gently, caught the tear before it fell further. His touch lingered for just a moment, grounding you, as if he was acknowledging everything you had to go through to reach this moment.

Everything from the emotional mess you were at the beginning, all the self-doubt and struggles, to this. You did it.

“Why?” You needed to ask, needed the answer.

Albedo didn’t step away, remaining close to you. “You went through difficult times, and you lost yourself in your grief. It felt as if you were shattered, and no matter how hard you tried, the pieces wouldn’t fit back together.” 

He confessed what you once were scared of; he noticed your broken state. Your tears, your breakdowns, your emotional distress, your failures.

“And there was a strange feeling inside of me, urging me to do something, to not let you suffer anymore. And I asked myself, What can I do?” His thumb traced the path of your jawline as his eyes followed it. “But this was your own battle, and I had no right to interfere. You were the one who had to do it.”

His thumb was exchanged with his fingers, and he tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear. He looked so serene while looking at you.

“So I decided to motivate your alchemist self.” He knowingly smiled. “The y/n I knew, with the right motivation, would invest herself in an alchemy challenge. You doubted at the beginning and trailed behind me, but you slowly strayed away from my lead and took control. Over time you healed, and there was again that shine in your eyes.” Suddenly you noticed you two were not that far from each other, mere inches separating you. “I’m glad you're back.”

The words hung between you two, sinking into your chest with the weight of something you couldn’t yet name. Albedo planned this. Not for the sake of alchemy, for knowledge, or for an award. He did it for you. He had seen as you lost yourself and helped you build a path to lead you back. 

The realization sparked, a warmth spreading through you. He had always been there: watching and guiding you. And now, standing so close to each other, you could feel the warmth of his breath against your skin. You felt it.

The awareness of him. 

The way his presence destabilized you. The way his eyes, usually so composed, softened when they met yours. The way his lips parted, as if he wanted to say more, but the space between you had grown too thin.

Your pulse pounded in your ears. For so long you had dismissed the flutter in your chest, refusing to admit he was something more than your chief alchemist. But now, there was no running from what you were feeling.

You wanted him. And when your gaze crossed with his, you realized he wanted you too.

He tilted his head lightly, watching your reaction as the distance began to disappear, but you didn’t back away. You got closer to him, your breaths mixing. His lips brushed yours so lightly it felt like a caress.

And then, you finally kissed.

It started as a fleeting touch, barely there. It was careful, uncertain, and testing. The warmth of his lips, the way he exhaled softly, sent a shiver down your spine. But then, you responded. Your fingers curled into his coat, and you pulled him closer. He inhaled sharply against your mouth, and whatever restraint he had was shattered.

The kiss turned urgent. His lips pressed hard, parting, molding against yours in a desperate hunger that wanted to consume you. His hands were everywhere at once, one with its fingers tangled in your hair while the other slid up your spine, pulling you close to him as he kissed you deeper.

You met him with the same passion, your hands sliding up to his chest and then up to the back of his neck, fingers tingling in his soft hair. Your heartbeat was pounding so hard, you were sure he could hear it too. 

His teeth grazed your bottom lip before soothing the bite with his tongue, and a soft sound escaped your throat that he greedily swallowed. His tongue teased against yours, sending a shiver through your body. Your tongues clashed, battling to see who was more hungry for the other, savoring the moment. 

And as he pressed forward, pushing you against the desk behind you, he left no space for anything but him. He was consuming you whole, but just a kiss, a kiss you never wanted to end.

But in your growing passion, you bumped hard into something, and you suddenly felt how Albedo covered you from the falling of several books and objects. Your lips separated due to the surprise, the tickling feeling far from disappearing, reminding you of your heated exchange.

“Careful.” His hoarse voice whispered against your ear, making you feel hot in every part of your body.

You had bumped into one of the bookshelves in the lab, the one you also used to put your belongings every day when you arrived. And as you two caught your breath, your eyes caught the sight of something that left you in disbelief. 

There, in between your belongings that had slipped out of your bag, was a jeweled amulet. It was a small turquoise stone with an almost translucent glow. Encased inside was a design of tri-feather wings with a diamond-shaped tail at the bottom. You stared at it, dazed, unable to grasp what it was and what it was doing there. 

It was a vision. An Anemo Vision. 

You were frozen, obviously confused. You didn’t have a vision. Was this a mistake?

You reach out to grab the vision, and realization hits you. This was yours. And when you look at Albedo, expecting him to be as surprised as you, you discover he is simply smirking. 

“It was to be expected.” 

It was like the emotions wouldn’t stop pouring out from you this day. As you held your newly obtained vision, you realized what you led here. To this moment. All this time you thought you were trying to prove yourself again, but in fact, you were becoming yourself again. You finally let the tears flow as you rested against Albedo’s body; he welcomed you in his arms. This time, the tears were of relief and happiness.

And this vision was proof of your journey.

It had been some weeks since the day you and Albedo kissed for the first time and since the vision found its way into your hands. You still were unsure about the meaning it had; sometimes you were entranced looking at it, as if its soft glow forbade you to forget you were now a vision wielder.

However, you didn’t have time to dwell on it. You had continued to work on finalizing the catalyst, moving to the final product. During your time together, your relationship began to shift. You weren’t sure what to call the relationship, but it was there, growing little by little. With every look, every touch, every kiss.

And after a total of eight months of research and hard work, the catalyst was finally complete. And tonight, the Knights of Favonius had organized an event in which the different divisions would showcase something, and you would present the catalyst to the knights, the scholars, and the interested citizens of Mondstadt. 

The Knights of Favonius had transformed the plaza outside of the headquarters into a lively festival. There were rows of wooden stalls and a few makeshift pavilions. Each and every one showcasing different projects, such as magical items, blacksmith weapons, and different types of strategy or knowledge-oriented books. There were a lot of people wandering between the exhibits and enjoying the event. 

At the center of it all stood a raised platform, reserved for the most anticipated presentations of the evening. That was where you were going to present your completed catalyst. You were nervous, but the anticipation was bigger than any other feeling.

“Show them what you can do.” Albedo encouraged you with a grin, softly kissing your hand before you left for the stage.

“I never imagined you would be such a chivalrous man, Albedo.” Lisa teased as Albedo approached where she was sitting, waiting for you to do your showcase.

“What do you mean?” He asked as he took a seat next to her, crossing his arms while his eyes followed your nervous yet confident form. 

“Oh, don’t play coy. I’ve never seen you so attentive before. It looks like you are acting like a gentleman in love.” 

Albedo pauses, tilting his head slightly as he processes her words. “Is that so? It’s a simple and natural response; I care about her, and I want to cherish her.”

Lisa chuckles, enjoying Albedo’s confession. “My, my… Such a romantic man; looks like Y/N is a lucky woman.” 

Albedo didn’t answer anymore, but he could feel the heat rush to his face. He watched as you spoke in front of the public, describing the process of designing and constructing the catalyst you held in your hands as they listened intently. There it was again, the rapid beating of his heart when you smiled and your eyes shone.

The last eight months were also a battle for him, as he questioned what he was feeling for you. He was a rational man, someone who had never gone through the experience of a real romantic relationship.

So, when the feelings arose in his mind, he tried to rationalize them, incapable of understanding the real meaning behind them. Then, he realized that’s not how feelings work. The feelings only grew with each interaction with you, even if it was a simple conversation. He couldn’t stop looking at you, paying attention to every detail of what you did.

And then he finally understood what attraction felt like and wondered how it would feel to have you against him, his lips on yours. Then, he did. He had you exactly where he wanted you for such a long time, and he knew this was just the beginning.

As you presented, with a careful flick of your wrist, the catalyst sparked with life and floated around you. People gasped in surprise as wind began circling around you in playful swirls, and the public marveled at how flowers and leaves floated around the place, creating a beautiful scenery.

“Remarkable!” Sucrose whispered in excitement as she joined Lisa and Albedo to watch your presentation. “Didn’t she recently obtain her vision?” She was amazed at the control you had over the element.

“She did.” Lisa said proudly, side-glancing at the main culprit of your amazing control of Anemo, who was too busy smiling at you to notice. Even if Albedo didn’t have an Anemo Vision, he still helped you to master the basics of elemental wielding.

When you finished your showcase, you thanked everyone for their attention, a wide grin on your face as you felt the excitement and pride of what you had accomplished. When you joined Albedo, Lisa, and Sucrose, you basically jumped to hug Albedo.

“How did I do?” You excitedly asked Albedo, reflecting your thrilled state.

He held you by the waist with a proud look on his face, and he caressed your cheek as he spoke. “That was the best showcase of the night.”

You giggled at his words, completely unaware of Lisa and Sucrose's secret exchange. Although you and Albedo have always been close, they could have never predicted the growing romantic relationship between the two of you. Yet, they were happy for the two of you. Seeing you smile again after so much time made them realize how much they missed your happy self.

“Lisa… should we interrupt them?” Sucrose discreetly asked her as she watched you and Albedo still hugging. “I want to congratulate y/n.”

“Not yet, darling. Give them a few seconds more; they are enjoying each other.” Lisa laughed at Sucrose’s blushed face.

With the three of you too distracted to notice, Lisa was the only one to pay attention to the person who was looking at you and Albedo. Your ex was there, his gaze darting between Albedo and you, his expression unreadable. But Lisa, ever perceptive, caught the unease that crossed his face, her lips curving slightly in amusement.

“Interesting.” She murmured, just loud enough for Sucrose to hear. “Some people are more entitled than what you would think.'"

“What do you mean?” Sucrose asked, confused over Lisa’s words.

Yet, Lisa didn’t answer. Sending your ex a threatening glance made him run away from the place in a hurry. At that moment, Lisa decided to personally take care of him if he refused to finally give up after seeing you with someone else. He wouldn’t ruin your new happiness, not on her watch.

After the event was finalized, you said goodbye to Lisa and Sucrose, thanking them for coming to see you and promising to go out with them soon now that you had more free time. To celebrate the conclusion of the project and the success of the showcase, you decided to invite Albedo to your house to rest in front of the fireplace after having a nice meal in one of the restaurants in the city.

The fire crackled softly, casting a warm glow in the room as you rested your head on Albedo’s shoulder. You were a little tired after the busy but exciting evening, but now, in the comfort of your home, everything felt softer. Albedo had helped 

“Thank you.” You murmured, the quietness in the room allowing him to hear you perfectly. “For everything you did for me.”

Albedo’s gaze lowered to meet yours. “I barely did anything; all of this happened because of you. You never needed me.” His words were gentle, yet there was something warmer than usual in his tone.

You smiled, shifting your position just enough to look up at him. Your faces were close now, the firelight flickering over his face, giving him a soft look on his usual sharp expressions. His arm moved slightly, making his fingertips brush against the skin of your back, sending a pleasant shiver through you. Your heart picked up its pace when his gaze dipped, lingering on your lips for just a second too long.

Neither of you spoke as you leaned in, finally closing the small distance between the two of you. His lips were soft and warm as they pressed to yours, gentle and slow. His free hand came up, his fingers tracing over the skin of your cheek as the kiss deepened. A delicious sound rose in the back of his throat as your fingers curled into the fabric of his shirt, pulling him closer to you. 

Then, you traced your fingers along the nape of his neck to his back, and you dug your nails in it. That was all it took.

Albedo inhaled sharply before his restraint broke entirely. His hand slid into your hair, gripping just enough to tip your head back as his mouth moved against yours with sudden, burning intensity. A loud moan escaped your mouth when his tongue brushed against yours. Your hands pulling him even closer to you, as the kiss turned heated and messier, filled with the want you two had for each other. 

“Tell me to stop, and I will.” He pulled away for a few seconds, his breathing uneven as he rested his forehead against yours. 

“Don’t you dare to stop.” You pulled him back at him, your answer clear in the way your lips crashed against his once more. 

He pressed his body against yours, trapping you between him and the bed of pillows and sheets you put together before. You were surrounded by his warmth and scent, his tongue exploring your mouth and his hands your body. He traced the shape of your hips and moved towards your legs, gripping your thighs as he parted them to accommodate between them.

You moaned into his mouth when his lips moved to your neck with urgency. You were burning when his breath hit your skin, his tongue following and leaving a wet trail. A gasp left you when his teeth scraped against your skin, you clutching at the back of his head. He let out a low, satisfied hum against your throat when you tangled your fingers in his hair and wrapped your legs around his hips. 

Then, you felt it. His erection dug into your lower stomach, making the wetness between your legs increase, aching for him.

“Take this off.” You begged Albedo as your hands hurried to try to take off his shirt, clearly struggling.

He chuckled at your poor attempts, and he helped you to remove his shirt, throwing it away as he returned his eyes to you. His body was lean but toned, each line and curve undeniably striking. The sharp cut of his collarbones, the shape of his shoulders, the subtle definition of his muscles… It was as if he was sculpted. Your hands touched the warm skin, enjoying the feeling of such a beautiful body underneath your hands.

“You should take off yours too…” 

Albedo slowly slipped his fingers under the hem of your sweater, pulling it up and over your head with ease. You couldn’t help but smile at the way his eyes traced over the appreciative look as he took his time to observe your naked torso, his eyes staying a little too long over your breast.

“Beautiful.” Was the last thing he said before he dipped his head to press kisses against your collarbone, slowly moving towards your breasts?

You felt his warm lips brush over your breasts, kissing the sensitive skin and leaving behind a trail of heat wherever his lips touched. His hand found its way to your waist, gently massaging the soft flesh as he moved lower and lower, his kisses turning into wet, open-mouthed kisses.

He nipped at your soft skin, his tongue flicking over your hardened nipple, as his other hand massaged your other breast. Your moans turning louder as his teeth brush over the overstimulated skin of your nub, you couldn’t see it, but you felt his smirk against your skin, enjoying the sound of your breathless sounds. 

Albedo’s mouth leaves your breasts and moves down, leaving wet kisses on the valley of your breasts and your abdomen, his hands replacing his mouth and continuing to play with your perky nipples. He softly blows against your skin, and your breath hitches, but then his mouth encounters your pants, stopping him from going lower.

“Raise your hips, gorgeous.” He orders as his hands move to squeeze your hips, and you do as you are told.

When you raise your hips, he quickly drags your pants down along with your undergarments and again, throws it away to some place in your home you don’t care about.

You can see the lust in his teal eyes as he has you exposed to him, the place between your legs glistening with your wetness and almost ready for him. “Such a pretty pussy.” He says before he dives between your legs and covers your core with his mouth, lapping up your arousal.

“Ah!” Your hands grasp his hair as you moan and writhe.

His tongue played with your sensitive clit while he slowly introduced one finger inside of you. The sensation made you whimper; your hips jumped at the unexpected stimulation, making Albedo grab your hips tightly with his free hand so you couldn’t move. As his finger delved deeper in your insides, his tongue was flicking your nub and circling it with deliberately slow movements.

“More…” You desperately begged.

“Want more?” He looked up to you, his eyes burning with passion, and when you nodded, he smirked. “Then, I will give you more. Make sure you can handle it.” 

He returned to your pussy with a ravenous hunger and began sucking your juices as if he couldn’t get enough. His finger turned into two, pumping inside you mercilessly. The sudden change left you breathless, your head falling back in utter bliss. You felt the fire growing inside you; the only things that came out of your mouth were the sounds of his name and unintelligible sounds and moans. 

“You like that, gorgeous?” Albedo knew you liked it; he could see it in how you were losing yourself in the pleasure he gave you, but he wanted to hear you say it.

“Yes!” You barely managed, you say, too lost in your mind to think straight. His fingers stretching out your walls with every thrust, his mouth sucking on your sensitive clit, was almost too much; you could feel your climax approaching.

“Then cum.” He ordered, and your vision faded to black as your body shook uncontrollably.

Your hands held onto his hair, the sensation of your orgasm too strong and intense to focus. You came around his fingers, his mouth continuing to overstimulate your body, as he lapped the juices spilling out of you. 

He left your pussy and went for your mouth, kissing you deeply as you tasted yourself in his mouth. A grunt came out of his throat as your tongue wrapped around his, your body slowly calming down with his caresses on your body. Albedo broke the kiss and placed himself between your legs, his thick cock inches away from your entrance. You didn’t know when he had taken his pants off, but you were thankful he did it. You could only admire the sight of it, the tip glistening with precum, and the size and girth were fucking perfect.

Such a pretty cock for a pretty boy.

“You want this?” He dragged his cock between your folds, and you shuddered at the feeling.

“I want it, Albedo. Please, put it in.” You begged, your previous orgasm forgotten and ready for more. He smirked, leaning down to kiss you before lining himself up in your entrance.

“Then take it.” He pushed hard, and your mouth opened wide, a moan escaping you at his cock finally filling you up.

Your body was still sensitive, but, God, did you feel good at your insides being deliciously stretched out. And when Albedo was completely inside of you, you couldn’t be happier to be stuffed full by him. 

The feeling was addictive, and you two wanted more. Albedo didn’t make you wait any longer; he pulled out and thrust back in, setting a slow and steady pace. His lips went for yours, the kiss messy but passionate as your walls closed around his cock. Your body was hot, and you felt so good you couldn’t contain the moans coming out of your mouth. 

“That’s it, pretty, let me hear how much you like it.” He whispered in your ear, his voice low and hoarse.

Albedo thrust into you hard, and you screamed in pleasure, your nails digging into his back. His thrusts grew harder and rougher, making you jolt when his tip touched a special spot deep inside of you. The sound of your wetness when his cock hit your pussy was obscene, but you loved it. His mouth went for your neck, marking the skin with every thrust, leaving the skin purple and red.

He was making you feel so good, and you never wanted him to stop. One hand found your breast, his thumb flicking and pinching your hardened nipple, while his mouth sucked on the other. He bit and licked the hardened nub, making sure to treat it just right.

Everything he did was driving you insane, and you could feel your second orgasm coming closer and closer.

But Albedo was going faster and harder, making your mind go blank and your voice come out louder. Your walls closed tighter around him, and the man above you moaned loudly at the sensation. 

“Are you close?” 

You only nodded, unable to form an answer. His free hand went for your clit and began to rub fast circles around it, causing you to arch your back at the overstimulation. He kissed you, swallowing every sound from your mouth, and his cock twitched inside of you, signaling that he was also close.

“Will you come with me, pretty girl?” 

Again, you could only nod, too lost in your ecstasy to form a coherent answer, but that was enough for him. Albedo smiled, kissing you and biting your lower lip as he tugged at it.

“Then let’s cum together.”

And as he rubbed your clit faster, his thrusts became sloppy. With one last thrust, you came with a loud moan, and Albedo followed behind, coming inside of you. Your body went limp as you felt the shockwaves of your orgasm traveling in your body. You could barely register anything besides the intense pleasure. 

Albedo slowly pulled out of you, making you almost sob at the loss of his cock and the feeling of emptiness, and you could swear you almost cried at the feeling of his cum dripping out of you.

He chuckled at the sight of your state, seeing that you still were out of it.

“I guess you are very sensitive.” Albedo said as he wiped some hair away from your sweaty forehead. You could barely nod at his statement. “It’s ok, I like how you look right now.” Maybe one day, you would let him paint how devastating you look right now. 

As your high settled down, you saw Albedo coming back from some place in your home with a towel in his hand. Your eyes tracing every inch of the naked and sweaty skin. He grinned when he caught you staring at him. 

“Stare at me all you want, but let me clean you.”

“Alright.” You smiled shyly, allowing him to clean the mess between your legs.

He did it gently, the once passionate man long gone, his soft and tender fingers cleaning his cum mixed with your own slick. You flinched slightly at the sensation of the towel over your very sensitive skin, making Albedo stop and look at you with concern. You mumbled, ‘It’s fine,’ and he continued to clean. When he finished, he left the towel on the closest surface and returned to lie down next to you.

The room was quiet now; the only sound was your soft and steady breathing. The warmth of the fireplace warming your naked bodies. You traced lazy circles on Albedo’s chest, your touch light but absentminded. Your thoughts drifted, thinking of how you once felt lost and alone, but you were here. Happy. With Albedo hugging you as he played with your hair, the sound of his breathing offered comfort and made you feel whole. 

You tilted your head and found Albedo already looking at you. His eyes are soft and gentle, studying every detail of your face. You wanted to laugh; the man who gave the best sex of your life was gone. Yet, you didn’t mind. You liked the calm and rational Albedo more than anything, as he was the one who supported you when you needed it. 

“Be mine.” He murmured, his voice a whisper. 

It sounded more like a statement than a question, but you knew he wanted to hear your acceptance. Giddiness surged in you, and you giggled.

“I already am.” 

And as the night deepened, the time slowed down. The both of you continued to savor the taste of the other, enjoying each other’s company. 

This time, there was no sorrow, no doubts, and no pain. Just the beginning of a new future. Yet, this time you were at peace.

You had once loved someone so much that you lost yourself, but the man next to you didn’t bring you down like him. This man helped you find yourself again. He hadn’t just stood by her—he had lifted you, helped you rebuild the pieces of your heart, and made you realize that you were worth more than the past.

© eternallia. it is not allowed to modify, translate, or repost.

[luxis-journal]

Now, now babyboo, yk damn well, imma reply. Enjoy love. And whoever wants to read this.🤔

When most people think of the term ‘good things' come to those who wait’; they never meant it in this form.

Sundays have now become the days in which the neighborhoods are lit up by the bustling farmers; all lined up in rows as they proudly showcase their crops and cattle’s of harvest to the onlookers The man, whose teeth are replaced by gold, shows his greed by descaling the quality of his fruits all the while unchanging many of his customers. The neighbors tend to avoid the vendor, seeing as they were swindled far too much for their hands to even touch the fruits. But, as luck would have it someone’s already fallen prey to them once more.

“You’re clearly selling these fruits for far more than their worth.” Stated the customer calmly, his voice leaving no room for an argument.

“Why you- I’ll have you know that these products are the freshest out of all the vendors sat here today!”

“I’ll believe that when a worm’s head isn’t sticking out half of your apples”

At that, the vendor lunged himself towards the man, hell-bent on serving justice to his ‘business’. Only to be stopped by a harsh grip

“I’d suggest you refrain from public violence. The least I could do is escort your stall out for once.” she stated, resolution dear in her words as her grip on the merchants never once swayed over.

The vendor tsked, pulling his hand away silenced once more.

“I didn’t know you were still on patrol duty.” said Zayne, a bit of surprise leaping out from his words.

She turned to look towards him, a hint of a smile gracing her lips.

“Well unfortunately, this job doesn’t really let me have the day off.”

“Shame really, it’d make my job much easier if it did.”

To that, she scoffed, lightly nudging him along. They walked towards another stall, hoping to find another, more fruitful vendor.

“What are you doing all the way here, Zayne? The last time I checked, it took about half an hour to get here from the clinic-.” She coughed, stopping herself from calling him out as workaholic once more. “home, a long way from your place.”

A small chuckle rung out of his mouth, releasing some of the tension.

“I do have a place, unlike what someone might believe.”

“And no, it’s not the clinic.”

“uh-huh, sure, buddy.”

They made their way in front of the new fruit vendor, eyeing the collection only to be stopped.

“Hm~, didn’t expect to see you here, sweetie.” The vendor stated, his voice too familiar for her not to look up in shock.

“Haha, Sylus. Long time no see.” Her voice pitched slightly at his appearance, trying desperately to stifle her laugh.

There he was, standing behind a produce stall in the most uncharacteristic clothing she had ever seen. His hair tied up with a pink hibiscus clip, a pink hello kitty mask scrunched and resting on his sharp jaw, and the best of all, the princess peach on his soft pink apron boarded with ruffles and frills.

“Do you know him?” Zayne asked, his eyebrows scrunched in confusion and apprehension at the… colorful and interesting display of choices blinding him.

“U-uh yeah, he’s my frien-.” She stammers, only to be stopped by Sylus.

“Boyfriend, lover, beloved, you name it, she calls me just that.”

“Excuse me?” Zayne intercepts, his face a bit red from Sylus’s bold claims.

“You heard me pretty boy.” Sylus smirks, looking Zayne dead in the eyes.

The two men scrutinize one another for the tip of their hair to their toes. Zayne keeps his eyebrows raised as his arms cross across his chest, seemingly baffled at how this heathen could capture her attention. Sylus’s gaze wasn’t too far off the mark either, sporting a sneer and nose scrunched in distaste at how… responsible this man seemed.

The tension piles up far too fast for her liking, having her think of a plan to escape.

“Well this had been fun, but I gotta dash. Bye now!”

Replying fast, she turns around and runs out of there at break neck speed.

“Now hold on!”

“Don’t run away now!~”

That's the best you're getting out of me, women. Hope you enjoyed it! 😘

Nika's Open Mic Night!

𝕎𝕖𝕝𝕔𝕠𝕞𝕖 𝕥𝕠 𝕞𝕪 𝕗𝕚𝕣𝕤𝕥 𝕠��𝕖𝕟 𝕔𝕠𝕝𝕝𝕒𝕓/𝕣𝕠𝕦𝕟𝕕 𝕣𝕠𝕓𝕚𝕟

Calling all the LADS writers of Tumblr

Please read → Everyone and anyone is free to join. Write something for the prompt and tag someone who you'd like to see participate. You can do it in a reblog to this post or make your own post. Your character can be a self-insert, your MC, or an OC If you make your own post please add me in your taglist or tag it with #nikasopenmicnight I love reading you guys work. I'm going to be making an ongoing list with links to all the stories of everyone who chooses to join. There is no deadline have fun !

Okay I'll shut up now here's the prompt

the prompt: running into your main lads man (boyfriend) while you're out with your second favorite lads man (as a friend) and how they would react. [Credit: Anon]

I'll go first....Who's next?

This was supposed to be a quick trip, in and out, get what I need and leave. I should’ve gone to a different store because I knew better than to think I'd make a ‘quick trip’ to target. Dumbass. Nothing was ever a quick trip when me and Raf hung out. So here I am buying all new decor for my library at home. Rafayel stood by giving his opinion even when I didn't ask for it “How many blankets does one girl need?”

“There’s no such thing as too many blankets” I giggled as I squat down to chose a fluffy red blanket. I knew Sylus would like this no matter how much he likes to act like he doesn't care for them I see how he throws one over his lap when it’s within reach. “Thinking of me?” I jump at the sudden sound of his voice looking up to see his tall frame looming over me. It wasn’t uncommon for him to pop-up on me considering he has my location. I couldn’t help the smile that split my face in two as I looked up at him. I stood up and shoved the blanket in this direction. “What do you think?” His hand gently ran up and down the fabric, but his intense stare was fixated over my shoulder “It’s nice”

I turned to see Raf giving Sylus a just as intense stare, but instead of a frown like Sylus he had a smile on his face. His smile didn’t reach his eyes and I could practically feel the lightning cracking between them. Am I in the middle of some kind of pissing contest? Men. “Sylus stop being rude he's my friend” I poked him in his side which made him jolt, but he finally looked at me. His gaze softened slightly as our eyes locked. “Princess i’m not doing anything” He poked me in my forehead and I swatted his hand away; he knows I hate when he does that. “Don’t play dumb” I scowled at him and all he did was give me that sexy ass smirk. Sometimes I wish he was ugly …. no I don’t. Sylus put his gaze back on Rafayel and pulled me impossibly close to him by my waist. “Apologies if I'm interrupting, but we have an appointment with a tailor that we can’t miss”

Why is he lying? This is the first i’m hearing of said appointment. I struggled in his hold trying to pry his fingers from my waist, but he gave me a few small squeezes making me snort with laughter.

Raf didn’t even try to argue he threw his hands up in surrender “No worries I have paintings to finish” he grabbed his items that he tossed in the cart, gave my nose a pinch along with a quick “I’ll talk to you later” and sauntered off. The second Rafayel was out of sight I managed to wiggle my way out of Sylus' iron grip “What appointment are you talking about?”

“There isn’t one I just didn’t like the way he looks at you” He said in a matter-of-fact tone as if I was supposed to know that. “How exactly does he look at me?”

“The same way I look at you” I narrowed my eyes at him inquisitively; he returned the same look and I knew he was mocking me. “So you don’t trust me” It was more of a statement rather than a question.

“And here I thought your deductive reasoning skills were improving” he shifted his weight as he crossed his arms over his chest. “I trust you sweetie I don’t trust him he wants to be more than a friend” something was off although he seemed annoyed I could tell that it wasn’t me he was upset with. All of his tells were on full display by the way he avoided eye contact with and how his fingers absentmindedly tapped on his bicep. “Are you jealous?” I teased poking his chest repeatedly. He glowered at me as I tried and failed to stop the evil grin that spread across my face. “You’re enjoying this a little too much for my liking”

“You’re so cute when you're jealous” I reached up to pinch his cheek but as always he grabbed my wrist before I could even get close. “Enough” he’s so sick of my shit, but it’s not like he’s going anywhere. "Don't worry no one can steal me from you"

tagging w/ no pressure ;

@who-mentioned-rhys-larsen @irandial @ollieneedsamilkshake @phoenixiaxia @luxis-journal

@deepspacenova @world-of-hearts @comatosebunny09 @leighsartworks216 @awesomephilosophus

@ersharyzst