#and I love Rowan and Aelin for each other

[acourtofquestions]

Aelin glared up at him. "Another round."

Rowan just sheathed his sword. "After breakfast."

She growled. He growled right back.

"Don't be stupid," he said. "You'll lose all that muscle if you don't feed your body. So eat. And if you still want to train afterward, I'll train with you."

He offered her a tattooed hand.

But Aelin said, "People are dying. In Terrasen. In-everywhere. People are dying, Rowan."

"Your eating breakfast isn't going to change that." Her lips curled in a snarl, but he cut her off. "I know people are dying. We are going to help them, but you need to have some strength left, or you won't be able to."

Truth.

Her mate spoke truth. And yet she could see them, hear them. Those dying, frightened people. Whose screams so often sounded like her own.

Rowan wriggled his fingers in silent reminder. Shall we?

Aelin scowled and took his hand, letting him haul her to her feet. So pushy.

Rowan slid an arm around her shoulders. That's the most polite thing you've ever said about me.

[bubbles-for-all-of-us]

Hii I love your writing <333

can i request a fenrys x oc mate . Maybe where they don’t get along - either cause of aelin or something else and the oc is struggling to accept the bond due to trauma in her past

Thank you :))

Thank you for reading, darling. 🤍

warning: past trauma from forced ownership

Give it time

“Well what do you want me to fucking do?”, Fenrys growled fed up with the argument that had sparked over nothing once again. That had been happening awfully a lot now that the bind had snapped for you too. “Start by getting the fuck away from me”, you reached for the table knife before pointing it at him. “Kids, come on now”, Gavriel finally cut in, standing up from his seat to stand between you both. “Young love, how entertaining”, Lorcan chuckled crossing one foot over the other. “I’ll cut you next”, “Leave her the fuck alone”, you and Fenrys echoed in unison before turning your glares upon each other once more.

“Yn, give me the knife, mhm”, Gavriel mused stepping closer. “Tell him to stop sleeping outside my door”, you whined. “I am bonded to you, I can’t help it”, Fenrys growled, pulling at his hair. “I don’t want to be linked with you, I don’t want to be linked with anyone”, your eyes met Gavriel, who had been a fatherly figure to you for years now. “Sweetheart, hand the knife over and we will talk about this, find a way to make you more comfortable”, he softly reached out, seizing your wrist.

“I just got it back”, you whispered, “Please”, you whined, grabbing onto his arm. “I can’t alter fate, sweet girl”, Gavriel spoke softly, “Finding a mate is the biggest joy. Most don’t experience it ever”. “I don’t want to belong to anyone”, you growled through gritted teeth. “You’re making it sound like I’m about to chain you to myself”, Fenrys gritted his teeth. Your face fell. Growing pale right in front of his eyes. “Fenrys”, Gavriel snapped back.

“Rowan why don’t you take Y/n on a walk, get some fresh air”, Gavriel threw a glance that spoke volumes to his friend. “I didn’t…”, Fenrys started but Gavriel simply lifted his hand to silence him. “I’ll tag along”, Lorcan leaned forward, “Remember the waterfall I told you about?”, stepping forward he pinched your cheek, “Why don’t we check it out?”.

Fenrys watched his cadre brothers, letting you out the door. “You need to have more patience with her, Fenrys”, Gavriel pinched the bridge of his nose. “She snapped at me. I’m trying to have…”, “She was a slave for a long time. Chained to her keeper. Thrown around like a rag-doll”, Gavriel cut in. Fenrys felt his hands turning into fists. Anger bubbled inside him. “I took care of them”, Gavriel clapped his shoulder, “All I’m asking is that you give her breathing space”, “I don’t mean harm to her”, Fenrys argued. “I know that boyo, she will learn that too, you just got to give her the lead here”.

[throneofsapphics]

one more for the party

Aelins Court x f!Reader (mostly fenrys, rowan, aelin, and a bit of Lysandra)

Summary: you're invited to one of Aelin and Rowan's special parties

Warnings: smut, dvp, orgy

Word Count: 1332

A/N: happy kinktober everyone! here's the first of my kinktober shorts. if anyone would like to be added to the kinktober taglist, please let me know!

kinktober masterlist

How in the Gods did you end up here? 

That really was the question of the age. As a friend of Aedion’s, the King and Queen had taken a special interest in you, for months, unknown to you. You’d just assumed they were being friendly. 

Of course, their friendship was a given and if you’d desired nothing past that they would have accepted it, but you were glad there was even an option for something past that. This was something you never could’ve imagined. 

“Is it your first time at one of these?” Lysandra purred, running her hand down your arm. You turned to fix your eyes on the beauty, biting down on your bottom lip and nodding. She pried your lip away from your teeth with her thumb, running her finger across your bottom lip. “You’re quite the catch,” she winked and stood, extending her hand towards you. “Let me help,” she offered. 

Help? Perhaps help smooth things over, make it a tad less awkward for you. 

You took her hand, one of the easiest decisions of the night. 

The room quieted as you stood, as Lysandra’s hands tugged at the thin straps on your shoulders, slowly lowering the fabric to expose you to the room, inch by inch. 

As all of their attention slowly fixed on you, you felt yourself grow bolder inside, more sure and certain that you could do this. The attention, especially from such an attractive room of individuals, was captivating. 

Aelin beckoned you forward, a Queen summoning a subject, when your dress hit the floor, soft fabric pooling around your feet. There was a slightly impatient lilt to her eyes that thrilled you. 

“Go on,” Lysandra encouraged you. You sent a sheepish and thankful smile over your shoulder, you hadn’t realized you’d been stuck standing still. She gently pressed between your shoulder blades and you began moving. 

Soft carpet caressed your feet, cushioning every step to be as light as any Fae warriors. It was ages and eternity before you finally arrived in front of Aelin, who stood as you approached. 

“Hello lovely,” she murmured, sweeping your hair away from your face, “we’ve been hoping you’d show up at one of these for a while.” 

“I don’t know why I waited.” 

Your answer earned you a grin of approval, and she gripped your chin between her thumb and forefinger, tilting head slightly as she brushed her lips against yours, the barest hint of a kiss, before trailing across your skin, leaving burning embers and flushed flesh in her wake. 

Her lips hovered what must be a hairsbreadth from your ear, “I’d like to see you with Rowan and Fenrys. If you’re agreeable.” Oh you were agreeable. You nodded. She tutted. “I need to hear you say yes,” 

“Yes,” you said, right on beat. 

Aelin drew back and let out a low whistle. 

You bit back a chuckle, especially as Fenrys grumbled, “I’m not a dog.” 

You caught Rowan sending him a side-ways are you sure about that glance, and dodging the other male’s elbow. 

Not giving you too much time to overthink, they each bracketed you, hands running up and down your abdomen, thighs, sides of your breasts, shoulders, touching each bit of you they could reasonably reach with a painful gentleness. Touches grew firmer, longer, rougher, breaths grew shorter, turned into pants. 

“Can you take both of us, beautiful?” Rowan asked, kissing the space below your ear. 

You nodded eagerly, adding a breath ‘yes’.

From the corner of your eye, you spotted Lysandra and Lorcan, Elide and Aedion coupled off, side by side. 

“Focus on us, I know they’re very pretty,” Fenrys chided, his mouth turned up at the corners, the beginning of a smirk. Aedion caught your eye and winked before refocusing on the small female on her knees in front of him. 

Fenrys walked backwards, tugging you with him until his knees hit the edge of the bed, letting you crawl on top of him, bodies sharing heat, skin lighting on fire where it met. Your lips gently sucked and nipped their way down his neck, small groans leaving his lips. The sound was music to your ears. 

He ran his hands up and down your sides, as if he was drinking in the feel of you, soaking up every bit of you he could get. 

You felt... fuck, Rowan was big, bigger than you expected against your back. 

“We’ll make it fit,” you heard him behind you, a hint of amusement in his tone. You hadn’t meant to say that out loud. You told him as much. 

“You didn’t, he’s just arrogant,” Fenrys said, before recapturing your attention with his mouth, lips wrapped around your nipple, sucking and scraping lightly with his teeth. 

He was good. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. You were sandwiched between two people who knew exactly what they were doing. You arched away from him as Rowan’s fingers grazed over the bundle of nerves between your thighs, hitting another pleasure center. 

Fenrys’s hands gently but firmly gripped your hips, sliding you up far enough to hover over him, pressing against your entrance.

Too slowly, he lowered you onto himself, eyes daring you to complain. You took it as a challenge, using the muscles in your legs to slow it even further, squeezing in a way you knew would drive him wild. Sure enough, a hiss left his lips and you hid your smirk. 

“Clever witch,” he groaned, before tangling one hand in the back of your hair, the other braced against your hip as he slammed himself home. 

You gasped, breath catching, trying to imagine fitting another inside of you. It wasn’t possible. Couldn’t be. 

But ... as Fenrys began to move, as you gave yourself over to the feeling you felt a greedy little thing inside of you rise, wanting more, knowing more was available. 

“Hold,” you heard the command in Aelin’s tone and Fenrys paused. Practiced almost. They’d had a plan, you realized. 

The Queen, your Queen approached you from the side, her eyes darting frequently to your lips. You imagined how hers would feel. Would they be soft? Would she be firm or gentle? Full of passion or caution? 

You didn’t have to imagine for long. 

Pure passion. 

As she was captivating you, you felt another pressure between your legs. A hand, fingers sliding inside of you, stretching you. You winced. 

Aelin didn’t miss a thing and pulled back slightly. “You’re doing wonderful, beautiful,” the praise lit something inside of you, soothed a bit of the pain you were feeling down there. If your Queen was telling you that, surely you had to believe it, it had to be the truth. 

Another finger was pressed inside of you. Discomfort, but not quite pain. 

Aelin caught your attention again. You felt Fenrys’s hair brush against your shoulder, his teeth nipping at your neck. 

Someone else was running fingers through your hair. Lysandra. Purring words of comfort into your ear, telling you how fucking incredible you looked right now. 

Confidence filled you with her words, with all of their words. 

When Rowan's cock finally notched against your entrance, he murmured, “the first bit is the worst,” and didn’t give you more time to think. 

Mouth parted in a silent scream, your head dropped forward against Fenrys’s shoulder. 

Their arms tightened around you holding you perfectly still. 

“Can I move?” You heard the barely controlled restraint in Rowan’s voice. 

“Yes,” you managed to say. 

“Deep breaths,” Fenrys said as the other male pushed. 

It burnt. It stung. Gods, it fucking hurt more than his fingers possibly could. But with the pain came that beautiful edge of pleasure you were able to ride. 

That pain slowly ebbed away as he inched inside of you, as Fenrys moved, as Aelin’s fingers toyed with your nipples while they could, before the two males really started moving in unison and she retreated to watch. 

The three of you certainly put on a show that night. 

-

kin ktobertaglist: @fourthwing4ever @rowaelinsdaughter @bookishbroadwaybish @lilah-asteria @nestaismommy @erencvlt @daycourtofficial @emidpsandia @thelov3lybookworm @hannzoaks @callsigns-haze

general taglist: @rowaelinsdaughter @bookishbroadwaybish @nestaismommy @erencvlt @book-obsessed124 @callsigns-haze @littlest-w01f

[erisvansserra]

Follow You

Fenrys x Reader x Azriel

Summery: 30 years ago, Y/N fell through a portal and woke up in Prythian naked an afraid. She counted herself lucky that she was found by the shadowsinger and his high lord, who took her in and gave her a home. Despite their hospitality she dreamed of her home and the mate she left behind, Fenrys, who searched for her until one day.. he finds her.

A/N: OMG thank you for all the love I've received for this fic!! I literally did not expect it and I'm so happy you all like it! You can read part 1 here.

You awake in the middle of the night and turn in bed to reach for Azriel, your hand skimming the covers in search for his warmth. When you feel nothing but cold sheets you open your eyes and look to where he should be, nothing. As you begin to wake from the early morning brain fog you realise you're in the townhouse, your friends had returned, and you were going home.

......

Hours later you're sitting in the living room with Rowan and Aelin, their presence and laughter bringing you such comfort, for the first time in 30 years you feel truely at home. Aelin was in the middle of telling you about Lysandra and Aedions wedding when the inner circle walked through the front door. Your eyes met Azriels the moment he walked through the entry way, his face a mask of indifference that made you feel uneasy. You stood from your seat on the couch, unsure if you should make the steps toward him, seek the comfort in his touch.

"Hi" you say in a soft voice, the world dripping away like melting ice as you and the shadowsinger stare at each other "Hi" he responds in a voice just as soft. His smooth voice encases your body in goosebumps, his hazel eyes took a quick sweep of your body checking for any injuries making you smile slightly. "Can you two stop being so.. weird and hug?" Cassian's loud voice breaks through the tension, making your smile grow and a blush spread on your cheeks. Azriel smiles as well and makes his way over to you, wrapping an arm around your shoulders as he presses a kiss to the top of your head. You feel a new type of tension enter the room as Rowan and Aelin stiffen from their spots on the couch. "What's this?" Aelin asks, her posture changing from casual comfort to regal royal with the snap of her spine. You feel that stomach twisting guilt begin to suck you in again as you look between your friends. "She's my partner” Azriel answers with a slight growl as he brings you closer to his chest, tucking you in under his chin protectively. Aelin goes to open her mouth bur Rhysand raises his hand to interject "may I show you something?" he asks. Rowan and Aelin look at each other cautiously before nodding, slowly Rhysand uses his powers to enter their minds and shows them what happened that night they found you in the wood.

30 Years Ago

You fell from the sky, the limbs of trees smacking your naked body as you crashed to the cool ground. You screamed in pain as your plumet reached its end, hitting the ground so hard you swore the earth shook. With a broken arm that you cradled with care you began walking around the unfamillar woods, the air smelt different here, your keen eye sight couldn't pick up on anything that reminded you of home. You walked for about 15 minutes before a winged male landed before you. You yelped and began running in the other direction, your legs full of scratches that burnt and bled as your legs pumped under you. Before you got the chance to escape another winged male landed and put a knife to your throat. You whimpered and fell to your knees before him, your broken arm still pressed to your chest as you quickly submitted to the winged male. You felt the tip of his knife under your chin, slowly he lifted your face to his, all you could see in the darkness was those light hazel eyes. "Who are you?" he asked, his voice as harsh as the ground you kneeled upon "y/n" you answered. The male from earlier now stood behind you, their weapons within reach if they needed it.

The memory changed, a new memory coming to view.

It had been 18 months since the night court took you in, tried to give you a home, tried to replace what you lost. Azriel was at your door, a fresh bowl of soup in his hand as he knocked and waited for you to answer. After a few moments he let himself in, you were in bed, depression had taken its toll on you. Your hair was knotted, your skin blanched and dry, your eyes red and puffy from the lack of sleep. Azriel tried to get you to talk, but all you could mutter was his name "fenrys" over and over again. .

The memory moved forward again. You sat in the grass 6 years ago, your skin starting to give a healthy glow and your hair long and healthy. Azriel watched you as you shook your hair out of your face and laid in the grass, sweeping your hands over the blades as you took in the sweet spring air.

He approached you, his boots flanking either side of your head as he peered down to look into your eyes.

“Shouldn’t you be training with Cassian?” He asks, crossing his arms over his chest. With a click of your tongue you answer “I don’t want to train today, I want to enjoy the first day of spring”. A small smile threatens to creep along his face as he nods, considering your statement.

“Well” he starts, turning his head to look out towards the house of wind, like he could see Cassian sitting there still waiting for you to turn up .“What would you rather do today? If not train” he finishes, his eyes sweeping over to you once more.

You inched your head slightly closer to his left boot, cocking your head as you looked up at him. The sun cast his face in shadow, making his features look sharper and his warm eyes glow ever so slightly.

“Maybe I could do some spy work with you?” You ask, his eyebrows jump up in surprise.

“Really?” He says with a warm chuckle that sends a shiver down your spine “I’ve been here 24 years and never left this court, I’d like to see more of this world” you answer. His face drops slightly at your words, his brother has been locked under the mountain for some time now, prythian was no longer safe. He couldn’t risk losing someone else he.. cared for, not now, not ever. But when he looked at you, saw the hope in your eyes and watched as you held your breath, something in his chest cracked.

“Okay, you can come with me to the edge of our court” he relents but smiles as he watches you beam up at him.

Neither of you knew it, but this was the first stepping stone towards your relationship now. Love slowly blossomed between you in the following year, but he knew deep down you still loved your mate and that was something he was willing to live with if it meant he could spend the rest of his life with you.

Present day

Aelin and Rowan jumped back in their seats as Rhysand left their minds “what the hell was that?!” Aelin shouted, her hands coming to cup each temple of her head.

Rhysand took a moment to explain and apologise for his power, that he was showing them Azriel memories in hopes it can better illustrate your situation. You stepped away from Azriel and walked over to Rowan, kneeling before your cousin you took his large hand in yours.

“I mourned Fenrys for 25 years cousin, I still mourn the loss of him now…” you say as Rowans emerald eyes flick to yours, his mind still reeling from Rhys power.

“I know you of all people would understand the guilt I feel, Rowan, please do not pass judgement too harshly on me” you continue, your voice threatening to convey the very guilt you feel as it tremors slightly. Rowans eyes soften at your words, he doesn’t look towards Aelin as his hand tightens around your own. He gives you a small nod in understanding, his eyes flicking between your own, the pressure lifting from your chest slightly.

Releasing a shuddering breath you rise in front of him and look towards Aelin, you know her and Fenrys are close, you knew it was her judgement that would affect your standing in court. Her eyes pierced you in your place, not a friend but a queen sat before you now. her eyes rake up and down your body before she says “Fenrys has been in his animal form the last 30 years searching for you”.

“Show me” you say looking to Rhysand, his expression unreadable as his eyes shift to Aelin, she nods in acceptance and you feel Rhys power enter your mind.

You see a white wolf, from Aelins POV. It laps at the lake you swam in in your dream, its fur greying and matted in some places. Her eyes skim over its emaciated body, ribs poking out from under its skin.

“You have to eat Fen” you hear Aelin coo to the wolf, it doesn’t even look at her before it plods off in the opposite direction, off to continue its search.

Rhysands power leaves you again, you feel the bile racing up your throat as you turn and sprint through the inner circle to make it outside where you throw up over the balcony railing. Azriel sighs and leaves to comfort you as he always has.

Back in the living room of the town house Rowan shoots Aelin with a glare, clearly upset she chose that memory of Fenrys instead of one where he looked a little less disheveled. “How often does she react like this?” Rowan asks the group as he stands from his seat.

“When she first arrived it was everyday, now it’s… every other day” Cassian answers looking over his shoulder to where you stand beside Azriel as he rubs soothing circles on your back. “I know she is mated to your friend, I know you want to protect him” he continues, his voice soft as he looks back at Rowan. “But she does grieve him, do not think that because she has found Azriel she has forgotten her mate”.

Rowan looks out to you now, his chest threatening to concave on itself as he sees you, his cousin and best friend lost in a fit of grief. He places a hand on Cassians shoulder as he walks past him to the balcony where you and Az whisper to each other. At his arrival you look over your shoulder, your eyes red and puffy from the tears that you’ve shed.

“When was the last time you shifted, cousin?” He asks as he places a hand on your shoulder. “Rowan I-“ you begin but his warm share cuts you off, you sigh before you answer him again “I haven’t shifted since I’ve been here”

Rowan hums in response, then lightly pats you back, he walks around you and the shadowsinger, down the garden steps and waits at the bottom.

“Come on y/n let’s have some fun” Rowan says as he shifts into a hawk. Azriel looks to you in disbelief, he takes a few steps away as the rest of the inner circle make their way outside to investigate the bright light they saw when Rowan shifted. You look at each of their faces, then back to the bird that flies impatiently around the townhouse.

“What animal do you think is faster?” Aelin asks no one in particular as she joins the rest of the house. The inner circle look to her as you decent the balcony and give your body a quick shake as you prepare to shift. A bright light engulfs the garden again as your body bends and transforms into a black panther, your sleek body and coat shine in the sun, you move your paws along the grass feeling the earth beneath you.

Looking over your shoulder your eyes meet Azriels who stares in disbelief, but in this moment you don’t care about anything but the primal call in your heart. The call to run, to hunt, to stalk. The hawk swoops from above you, its sharp talons clipping your ear warning a growl from deep in your feline belly. As the hawk shrills in warning you take off, running away from the townhouse and down the streets of velaris.

A/n: sorry If this chapter seemed super jumpy, I wanted to give more back story to Azriel and y/n while also capturing Aelin and Rowans discomfort. I hope you liked it!!

[rizzoreads88]

✨You can love Elain AND Gwyn…

You can love Azriel AND Lucien…

You can love Nesta AND Feyre…

You can love Tamlin AND Rhysand…

You can love Chaol AND Rowan…

You can love Aelin AND Manon…

You can Love Cassian AND Eris

You can love whoever AND whoever else…✨

Everyone is going to like/dislike different characters and that’s ok too but I constantly see a lot of people pit other characters against each other and for the life of me I don’t know why.

Every single one of SJMs character has their good/bad qualities and moments.(except the actual villains). They are all flawed and relatable in different areas.

[coeurdelain]

We’re not the ones who created this atmosphere

The ship war started becoming toxic the day Gwynriels decided to put their ship on the same level as Elriel or even Elucien.

Elain and Azriel have a mutual interest. They have romantic interactions and want to be together.

Elain and Lucien are linked because they are mates. Even though I’m not a fan of this ship, I stay objective because they are, unfortunately, tied by the mating bond.

Gwynriel is not on the same level as Elriel or Elucien.

It’s just an interpretation of the bonus chapter. There is nothing in the books that shows Gwyn and Azriel share anything significant.

They had five interactions related to training. They haven’t shared anything personal like Aelin and Rowan, nor have they built a particular bond in the books like them.

Azriel didn’t even worry about Gwyn when she was kidnapped, and that alone is enough for me to refute the theory that they are mates. Because yes, it’s a theory, not a fact. (Please make the difference)

All this to say that if Gwynriels stopped acting as if their ship was on the same level as Elucien or Elriel, there wouldn’t be any toxicity in this fandom.

Some people act confident as if their ship were confirmed when, in reality, they are the ones who created it.

Elain and Azriel : canon because they have a mutual interest.

Elain and Lucien : canon because they’re mates.

Gwyn and Azriel : not canon. This ship is based on a theory.

A theory that for me can be debunked by the fact that Lorcan and Aelin had similar interactions—which could simply mean it was magic—and by the fact that we know a mate reacts violently when their mate is in danger, yet Azriel never displayed such behavior with Gwyn. (And other things, like the fact that I don’t think an author would write a scene where the mate in question is begging on his knees for a woman who isn’t his mate knowing that he has met his mate.

In short, Gwynriel is not on the same level as Elucien or Elriel. This ship didn’t exist in the books—some people made it exist.

So once again, if some people stopped acting as if Gwynriel were on the same level as the other two ships, as if Gwyn and Az being mates were a fact and not just a theory, maybe this fandom would be a lot healthier.

But no, the Gwynriels chose to look down on Elriels, to act as if Elriel doesn’t exist, as if this ship isn’t even a possibility—which is absurd considering that Elain and Azriel are clearly interested in each other.

They behave as if Gwyn and Azriel being mates were a fact when it’s just a theory. They reduce Elain and Azriel’s relationship to lust and twist their romantic interactions.

They act as if the bonus chapter put an end to Elriel when, in reality, they are the ones who interpreted it that way. An interpretation is not a fact.

So yes, in the end, we’re getting tired of people who completely deny Elain and Azriel.

And they’ll say, « But Elriels are also confident »

The difference is that there’s a distinction between your ship and mine. One ship shares a mutual interest, and the other doesn’t.

And because people will say, « But don’t forget about Rowan/Aelin/Chaol or Chaol/Nesryn/Yrene » all it takes is rereading the books to see that these situations are nowhere near comparable to Lucien/Elain/Azriel. The fact alone that Lucien and Elain are mates, yet Elain wants Azriel and Azriel wants Elain, already makes this situation different from any other love triangle.

So I don’t even understand the Gwynriels who rely on TOG couples to reassure themselves or justify their confidence.

(I just reread myself, and I repeated myself so much😭sorry, just wanted to make myself understood)

[danikamariewrites]

Torn

Aelin x reader x Manon ft. Rowan & Dorian

Note: Happy day 1 of poly+ week! I’m so excited to post these fics you have no idea.

Day 1 is Who’s Court is it Anyway? Being with Aelin and Manon is like walking on air. But being romantically involved with both queens (and kings) comes with its struggles as they constantly fight over which kingdom you spend more time in.

Warnings: angst

Watching the verbal volley between the two queens was fascinating. I didn’t even say anything.

Aelin and Manon have been throwing subtle insults at each other since I sat down for dinner. Rowan and Dorian were noticeably absent from the table.

It’s hard to stop them when both are so strong willed and stubborn.

Manon's iron nails fly out, splintering the wooden table top. Aelin rises from her seat, flames dancing in her eyes and flick up her golden hair. “You’re being selfish.” Aelin growls.

My heart stutters from fear. The realization that Aelin and Manon are truly angry with each other finally dawning on me. I don’t even think they realize I’m still here.

“You’re the selfish one! She basically lives here and she’s lucky if you or Rowan let her out! How can she even visit Rifthold if you keep y/n locked up here?”

Now it’s my turn to get angry. I stand so fast my chair screeches as it flys across the floor. Aelin and Manon stare at me wide eyed, finally noticing me. “You’re both being selfish. And how dare you talk about me like I’m not here!”

They don’t even acknowledge what I’ve said. Going right back to fighting, too wrapped up in wanting to be right. Continuing their screaming match I give up on getting their attention.

Stomping down the hall I head to Rowan’s parlor. The kings lounge on the couch, drinking and laughing together. Why couldn’t Aelin and Manon get along like this?

I shove myself between the two with a huff, hugging my knees to my chest. “Darling, what’s wrong?” Dorian asks, caressing my cheek.

“They’re fighting again.” Both let out a sigh and wrap an arm around me.

“What now?” Rowan asks softly with a kiss to my temple. “How one’s more selfish than the other and I’m not allowed to go anywhere.”

They tense next to me. I know Dorian and Rowan are communicating silently. And I know they both realize there’s a little truth to that statement. “I’ll go talk to them.” Rowan moves to leave but I grab him. “No,” I pulled him back. “Let them figure it out.”

I sit with Rowan and Dorian for over an hour before Manon and Aelin find me. “There you are,” Aelin says with a sigh of relief. I stare at them blankly as they kneel in front of me. “Love, we’re so sorry if we scared you.”

My scowl deepens. “I wasn’t scared. I’m mad at you two.” They both recoil with hurt looks. “If you two, hell the four of you, can’t talk to each other like normal people, then I can’t do this anymore.”

Tears sting my eyes as I rush from the room, leaving the four royals stunned. If they won’t talk like normal people then I can’t stay and have my heart pulled in two directions.

[theladyofbloodshed]

I’m going to be a little controversial under the cut

Sjm meeting her husband on her first day of college and only loving one man since she was 18 is very evident in her writing. I don’t meant to say it’s a bad thing to only have one relationship, but she writes all previous relationships of her characters as meaningless compared to the current one.

Any previous crushes/relationships of her characters were shallow. Whilst they may have felt like something at the time, in hindsight they pale in comparison to the Great Love. Or she writes them as being wrong, wrong, wrong and has to tarnish it in some way to make the Great Love seem better.

Rowan wanted to marry Lyria and was expecting a child with her then sjm retconned it to be a false bond to manipulate him and has Aelin be the much greater love, disregarding the past. He loved her so much he was going to have a baby with her.

Sam becomes just a memory of a teenage crush because he can’t compare to Rowan for Aelin as they’re mates.

Sorcha is just a servant who Dorian had fleeting feelings for despite her losing her head for getting close to the prince when he was lonely.

Isaac Hale is just a boring tumble in the hay - and not the boy who Feyre shared her worries with and he cared enough to buy the contraceptive tea because she couldn’t afford it.

Tamlin was a walking red flag and Rhys can love her so much better despite the months they spent together happy and falling in love.

Graysen and his father swap roles so the former can bash Elain and treat her cruelly while even his father looks shocked.

Jesminda is murdered but she was just a lesser fae and clearly will matter less to Lucien than his mate.

Shahar gave Hunt an opportunity to be something great then its revealed she just used him for his power and didn’t love him to the same depth - not in the way Bryce can.

It is so odd that she cannot write a couple who realise that they’re not each other’s endgame. She could have written that Feyre and Tamlin struggled greatly after the war and realised that the curse had forced them together but their romance dried up, no hard feelings.

Rowan could have been Lyria’s mate and still loved Aelin just as much 200 years later. Graysen could have said to Elain that he loved her still but could not be a fae rather than insult her.

People can love many times in their life. Just because they don’t end up together forever, it doesn’t mean a relationship didn’t matter.

[shadowdaddies]

Hello!!! Can I please request a Fenrys x reader fic where they realise they’re mates during the war and all that but reader and Aedion are twins so Gavriel is also obviously her father and just how they deal with the messiness of the situation but also with lots of fluff from all sides? Thank you so much 💚💚💚

I LOVE this request; it took me a minute to figure out how to make it fluffy just because Empire of Storms is so intense but this is such a cool idea; I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it💜

Reunited

Fenrys x Reader (ft. Daddy Gavriel)

Your world flipped upside down when Adarlan conquered Terrasen. Managing to escape with your brother, Aedion, the two of you formed a plan to infiltrate the Kingdom of Adarlan, developing rebel forces for when you were reunited with your cousin, Aelin.

Aedion took over as general of the Bane, filling his ranks with those who sympathized with your cause, while you worked your way up in the palace as a servant. Your duties, ranging from cleaning rooms to becoming a handmaid to the Queen, provided great intel for Aedion that allowed the Bane to stage battles. 

When Aelin returned, you aided in her rescue of Aedion, joining her and Rowan on their journey to Skull’s Bay from that point. 

It was in Rolfe’s office when your world turned upside down. You stood alongside Rowan as Aelin pitched her deal to Rolfe to join forces against Erawan. And then the door opened, revealing two males who made your heartbeat stutter for different reasons. 

You recognized your father immediately, and he you, when your tawny eyes locked with his. He stumbled forward, a gasp leaving his lips as you stared at each other. Rowan stepped protectively in front of you, one hand on your wrist as he stared down the famous Lion, the legendary member of Maeve’s cadre, Gavriel.

“Please, let me see her,” Gavriel pleaded with Rowan, his gaze struggling to meet yours around Rowan’s hulking form. 

“Rowan, it’s fine,” you whispered. You hadn’t held the same animosity towards your father as your brother, Aedion had, as you always believed he had a reason for leaving you. This was your opportunity to learn it.

Rowan turned to you, his gaze softening at the hope in your eyes. “He is blood-sworn to Maeve. He can only deny her will to an extent, and I will not let him hurt you.”

Your eyes flicked to the other male in the room, losing your balance as you stumbled backward at the look in his eyes. Fenrys watched you, awe etched on his face as he, too, moved towards you.

Rowan growled, Aelin leaping up from Rolfe’s seat where she lounged as they moved in front of you in a protective stance.

“It’s okay,” Fenrys promised, his gaze never leaving yours. “She’s my mate.” Tears formed at your eyes, the instant connection you felt towards the striking male in front of you breaking your guard down.

“Please, Row,” you tugged against his grip, desperate to meet the two males you were sure would be the most important in your life.

Rowan looked down at you, pure fae instinct in his eyes as he turned to the members of his cadre, every bit the legendary warrior as which he was known. “What are your orders from Maeve?” he demanded.

Gavriel spoke first, his voice like something from a long-lost dream, a memory from a past life that you longed for. “We were ordered to find Lorcan and kill him. If you can help us fail in finding him, we can assist you for as long as possible. Please, Rowan, Aelin, let me meet her.”

After a long, tense moment, Rowan and Aelin nodded to each other, parting ways as you now saw clearly the two males ahead of you. Your father moved towards you first, his dark tattoos in contrast to his golden hair the first thing you noticed as you rushed towards each other. He was warm, broad, muscular arms pulling you into his lithe form as you wrapped your own around him. This is home, you thought, holding back the tears as you allowed yourself to simply feel. 

Gavriel didn’t move, waiting until you reluctantly pulled away enough to look up at him. “I have so much to explain to you. So much that I wish I could take back...”

You shook your head, a small smile gracing your lips to silence him. “We will get to all of that - later. For now, I just want to know you,” you whispered, leaning up to press a kiss to your father’s cheek before turning your gaze to the male in the corner.

Breathing was difficult as you took in the extraordinary beauty of him. Blonde curls fell around bewildered, onyx eyes that locked in on you. The world spun around the two of you as his gaze held you in place. “My mate,” you whispered, moving towards him slowly, as though your feet moved of their own accord, your body drawn towards him.

Fenrys simply nodded, swallowing as his chest moved with each deep breath. A chuckle from where Rowan and Aelin stood drew the two of you from your trance, and you turned to see the amusement written on Rowan’s face. “Fen, I don’t believe I’ve ever seen you so stricken,” he teased.

You turned, enjoying the blush on the handsome male’s face. Biting your lip, you dared to bring a hand to the golden-brown skin of his cheek. With a slight giggle, you joked, “it’s nice to meet you, Fenrys.” He nodded, transfixed on you.

Gavriel cleared his throat, clearly refraining from his fatherly protective instincts as he leaned backwards slightly. “I’ve never... scented a mating bond quite so strong,” he noted, lip slightly curling as his glance flicked to Rowan and Aelin. They nodded in agreement, smiling encouragingly at you as they held their hands up, covering the scent from their noses.

“A strong bond, indeed,” Fenrys spoke softly, stepping forwards towards you as his fingertip grazed your jawline. A slight shift in movement from your father drew you out of the moment, stepping back as you giggled nervously at your newfound family, and mate.

Rolfe rolled his eyes, shooing the group of you out the door as Aelin sent him a wink. “Let’s go figure this out elsewhere,” Rowan grumbled, guiding you outside. The group settled at a pub downstairs, where you sat in between Gavriel and Fenrys, a deep peace settling through you as you enjoyed the presence of two males who cared about you more than you’d ever dreamed.

[moonlitstoriess]

Across the Universe-ch.16 (Fenrys x Reader)

Summary: Y/n has everything she needs in life. A family, friends, a safe place she calls home and most importantly a male whom she loves. What happens when it all changes when Y/n finds out about the betrayal of her lover and her so called family? Well, ending up in Terrasen and in queen Aelin's court was not what she expected but what she will need to start her new journey full of surprises.

See masterlist

Unsatisfied and frustrated doesn't even begin to describe how she was feeling at the moment. After Eva called her down, Fenrys and Y/n waited until she was gone before adjusting their appearances and leaving her room together. Of course, throughout their little journey towards the sitting room, they could only steal glances at each other because there were servants all around them.

And it was killing her. It was killing her how she couldn't just drag him back into the room and finish what they started but....all this lust started to disappear as soon as they entered the room and she heard the ugly voice of the Book of Breathings hissing.

They entered at the same time as Aelin and Rowan and moved towards the table around which everyone was gathered, their faces frustrated and confused. The book just wouldn't stop hissing and once she reached the table, coming to stand right beside Lysandra, y/n could finally understand what it was talking about.

"They are coming"

"For her, for her"

"They are coming for her"

"Magic is shifting"

"What in the seven hells does any of this mea-" Aedion's words cut off by Yrene shushing him, clearly telling everyone to be quite for a little more.

"They are interfering"

"Gates, shifting"

It was as if there were multiple voices, all hissing the same things at once.

Aelin looked concerned as she looked at no one in particular and asked, "I don't understand. Is it talking about the valg's coming? Because we already know that."

Yrene shook her head, "No. You're right, we do know that already so it must be saying something else. Did you hear what it said? Something about shifting magic and interference."

Elide crossed her arms, gaze still locked on the book. "Yes, but what does that mean? Who is interfering?"

Y/n took a sharp breath in before asking the book directly, "What are you talking about, exactly? Who is interfering? Is this about the valgs?"

And then the book said only two words which were more than enough to answer her questions,

"Death Incarnate."

Y/n may not be the most genius fae to ever exist, but she for sure would know that only one being across any universe has this title.

Her ex friend, her ex high lord, the one who came to her doorstep in the first place.

Rhysand.

Her gaze locked with Lucien's who, seemingly, also understood what was going on as his eyes widened.

Her body suddenly grew colder as she asked with a shaky voice, "Is-is he interfering with the gates? Is he the reason for the shift in magic or whatever? Is- are they coming?"

"Who?"

"What are you talking about, y/n?"

"Who is 'he'?"

She ignored everyone elses questions as her mind was solely focused on the book and what it would say.

"Yes. They are trying to come."

She should feel happy, hopeful. They were coming to get her and once the valgs were killed, the gates were closed, she would get to go back to her world. She should be happy. She should be grateful. But why wasn't she? All she felt was dread and anger at the prospect of having to face them as well.

"Shhh, y/n. I am here, you are safe, just relax."

It wasn't until she felt Fenrys' grounding touch and sweet whispers in her ear that she realized her whole body was shaking as her eyes were distant, ears not hearing anyone but her own thoughts.

"Someone, please get water."

Fenrys led her to the small lounge chair and sat her down as Lysandra gave the cup full of water for her but quickly changed the route and handed it to Fenrys after seeing her shaking hands. The male helped her drink it before placing the cup on a nearby table and holding her hand while caressing her back with the other hand.

Chaol looked at Lucien, "What is going on?"

The prince just sighed before replying, "Death Incarnate is the title of Rhysand. The high lord of the Night Court. And y/n was asking if it was him who was the cause for the shift in the gates, if he and the rest of his court were trying to come here and apparently, according to the book, they are."

Once Lucien's words were out, y/n felt Fenrys' whole body stiffen, his hold on her to tighten as he slowly turned his head sideways to look at her friend.

Manon looked at Lucien, her anger clearly evident in her voice as she asked, "The same court that mistreated her? That lied to her?"

"What are you talking about?" Aedion's voice was full of confusion as he looked at the witch, expecting her to reply.

Manon's gaze came to y/n, her eyes asking for permission to tell them what they need to know. She nodded her head, too tired to argue or think of anything as the witch turned back around and explained what y/n once told her, filling the ones who didn't know in on the situation back in Prythian.

Once she was done explaining, y/n could physically feel the tension in the room that could be cut with a knife.

"Oh Gods..." Aedion's mouth was hanging open as Lysandra crossed her arms, the shifters tone cool as she declared, "They are fools for coming here, then."

Rowan nodded his head. "Because we won't let them live what they did to you down."

Elide put her head on a distressed Lorcan's arm as she said, "How can you go back with them, y/n? I do hope that once you do, you will leave them immediately."

Dorian shook his head, glanced at Fenrys with a knowing look, "Whatever the case is, they are not welcome here. They are clearly not wanted by the book either because their interference is causing a shift in the magic. We have to finish this job by the day of the lunar eclipse. And if they do somehow appear, then the choice to make will be y/n's and no one elses."

Lucien sighed, coming forward and placing a comforting hand on y/n's shoulder, "They- I don't even know what happened to them. I will be honest, me and them were never truly close....we have a long and complicated history which is why they never fully liked me, especially Rhysand and Mor-"

"Who is Mor?!" Petrah's voice sounded frustrated and protective as she looked directly at Lucien from her position on the opposite couch.

The prince gave Manon's second in command a small shake of his head and said, "She is....well, let that be a story for another time because her main issue isn't even directly related to me, her issue is with my brother."

"So, she is an idiot then."

They all looked at Lorcan as Lucien coughed out an "Excuse me?!"

The tall man just shrugged his shoulders, "If she is hating on you simply for whatever your brother did, then she is a fool and so is the rest of them if they support her."

"I agree." Petrah didn't sound happy at all as she voiced her agreement.

Y/n managed to place a reassuring hand on Lucien's as the redhead said, "Well, that isn't the main point. My point is, they- I never expected them to be like that towards y/n because, after all, they knew her for so long and from what I saw, enjoyed her company extensively. They were like family. Especially Cassian, Rhysand, Mor and Amren. And then Feyre and her sisters came into the portrait and everything just went downhill from there. And Azriel-"

"Is mine."

Y/n froze.

Lucien froze.

Everyone froze.

The room went silent as all head turned to the owner of that statement.

Fenrys.

When she looked at him, y/n only saw anger, possessiveness and violence readiating of off him. His expression, his eyes and his body.

She broke the silence, speaking for the first time since sitting down. "Fenrys, what- what do you mean?"

His intense gaze landed on her as he simply said in a chilly tone, "I mean, if he dares to step here, to come within my vicinity, then he is mine. Mine to break, mine to deal with, mine to beat up and mine to destroy. You all can deal with the rest of them but I will say it now, no one touches Azriel. He is mine."

Her eyes widened as she and Lucien spoke at the same time,

"Fenrys, no. You don't- it will only bring more trouble than necessary to you."

"Rhysand is the most powerful high lord, he won't let you treat his brother like that."

"Watch me."

From the way he sounded and looked, Fenrys was not fooling around, nor was he afraid of what Lucien just revealed to him. Y/n didn't know whether to feel safe or worried.

Aelin cleared her throat, drawing all the attention to her. "Well....this is definitely a new side of Fenrys I have never seen. What about you two?" she looked between her mate and Lorcan.

The two male's exchanged knowing looks, Rowan seemingly realizing the reason for Fenrys' sudden protectiveness as he said, "Believe me fire heart, this is new for us as well."

Lorcan smirked, "Yes, very new."

Yrene's calm voice filled the room as she said, "I don't think I can keep that book in our room, it talks too much."

Aelin moved towards the object and took it, ignoring it's protests as she turned towards the doors, followed by her mate, "I am taking this to the library. I need Arthur to have a look at this thing."

As everyone slowly began to leave the room, Lucien gave her shoulder one final squeeze before moving to help a struggling Petrah up, and leaving with her still asking him, "What's that Mor's issue with you?"

"Petrah, not now."

"No! Tell me, I must know so that when I see her, I will know how to attack her."

"Are you mad?! Over my dead body will I allow you to get yourself involved in this mess."

Y/n smiled at the couple's banter as their voices slowly began fading away, leaving her and Fenrys alone in the room. She sighed but leaned her head on his chest, causing his arm to come around her waist and slowly help her get up.

Once out in the hall, she detached herself from him as they began to walk silently.

"Fenrys, you shouldn't attack Azriel if he shows up here."

"Y/n, my respect and care for you is eternal, but I will have to go against your wishes on this one because even hearing his name causes so much rage to bubble up within me. Now, imagine I get to finally see him in real life, how can I hold myself back? It's as if fate has delivered him to me on a silver platter. As if he is wishing for death by coming here."

As they began climbing up the stairs she could only manage to squeeze his arm, "Fenrys-"

"What did I tell you, y/n? That I will protect your light from any darkness that dares to approach. Azriel is that darkness and I won't hesitate to end him if he even comes into the same world as you."

They reached her room, she opened her door and turned to look at him, "Please, please, Fenrys. You may hurt yourself-"

"And what about you? You were hurt countless times by him, by his friends and by someone else whom you clearly won't tell me about but that is fine, I am willing to wait on that. Whatever the case is, you are not alone princess. Not anymore. Not as long as I live."

And with that, he placed a gentle kiss on her forehead and turned towards his own room, quietly saying, "Get some rest now, princess. You have had a long day."

She couldn't sleep the night away, her thoughts filled with everything that was happening around her. By the time sunrise hit, y/n was once again heading towards the training area but stopped once a thought came to her head. She turned in her path, heading towards the library, her determination growing with each step that she took.

When she reachd the large area, y/n saw a tall, frail and quite old male in robes putting books inside the shelves. When he heard her enter the room, the male turned towards her and gave y/n a small, polite smile, "Welcome, my name is Arthur and I am one of the three head protectors of this ancient library."

Y/n gave him a small smile in return and said, "Hello, Arthur. My name is Y/n and I believe queen Aelin brought a book here last night?"

The librarian nodded his head, "Oh, yes. Her majesty asked me to keep it safe and protected here so I put it under wards."

She fiddled with her fingers as she asked him, "Could I- could I please take it for a short moment? I have some questions that I believe it can answer so..."

Arthur smiled and gestured for her to follow him. "Of course, y/n. I know of you so I am aware that the book responds well to you and only you. No one else."

He brought her to a medium sized, square table. with the book in it's center, emanating magical essence from around it. Arthur said a couple of words before the room suddenly felt less heavy and suffocating. He turned towards her and said, "I removed the main wards, still keeping some precautionary ones around. Do be careful, y/n, don't stay with it for too long."

She nodded her head at him. "Believe me, I am very well aware of it. Thank you, Arthur. I only need a couple of minutes."

The male nodded and left the corner in which they were in, heading back towards the other end of the room, leaving her alone with the ancient object.

Y/n sighed before coming to stand right in front of it, steadying her voice as she spoke, "I am not scared of you anymore. You fooled me the first time by sending me here but you can't fool me this time around."

The book replied with a knowing tone, "Good, because I am not sending you anywhere anymore, Illyrian."

Realization slowly dawned upon her, "You knew, didn't you? All this time, you knew that I had a mate here. That this was where I was meant to be sent."

"I did say that you are home now when I sent you here didn't I, child?"

She sighed, "Yes, you did. And....what now? Do I just accept it because you sent me here?"

"You tell me, witch. What do you think you must do?"

"I don't know."

"My job was to only send you here. The choice to make will be yours. Elara said as much."

"Wait. My mother- you- how?"

"She managed to bypass all of the high lord's wards and contact me. Ordered me to do what I did and how could I say no to the most powerful ironteeth witch, Elara?"

Her heart warmed. Her mother, the woman whom she didn't even know of for most of her life, was the one who started it all. She smiled gently, reminiscing the mother whom she only knew for such a short time.

"I think I know my answer now."

"You do not have any more questions left in you?"

"No, I have finally understood my purpose. Goodbye."

As she turned around and left, y/n heard the book say, "Make the right choice, child."

"She is your mate, isn't she?"

Fenrys paused his eating and lifted his head to see Rowan enter the room. The blond just muttered some incoherent sentence before resuming his eating. Rowan came and sat on the opposite chair, giving him an amused look.

"Seems like you have worked up quite the appetite. Apparently being a territorial fae bastard turns you into a starved wolf."

"I am not a territorial fae bastard." Fenrys grumbled while his mouth was full of food.

Rowan smirked, "Well, Aelin calls me that whenever I do what you just did in the sitting room last night."

"And what did I do exactly?"

"Get all protective and posessive over your mate."

"We aren't mates."

Rowan chuckled "Oh please, Fenrys. We all saw you stake a claim on y/n in that room. Besides, I already had my suspicions and Lorcan isn't the best secret keeper."

Fenrys clenched his fists on the table. "That little prick. I knew I couldn't trust him."

"So you are mates. Fenrys, you hurt my feelings by choosing to tell this to Lorcan over me."

Fenrys playfully rolled his eyes at his friend and said, "Shut up, bird. Besides, we don't even know if we will be together. Neither of us has accepted the bond."

Rowan's expression became grim. "So I've heard. Seems like you both are scared."

Fenrys sighed "Truthfully, I would be lying if I said that I am sure everything will be perfect. That I will accept the bond and already be deep in love with her. I do feel a lot for y/n but love is something I never had any experience in and.....with the kind of a past that I have, I am of course afraid. Afraid of scaring her away or doing something wrong. But what I do know is that I would never hurt her. And I am willing to accept the bond because I do like her and imagining a forever with y/n does bring me so much joy."

The prince nodded his head at his friends confession and after a moment replied, "You truly need one another, Fenrys. You need healing and so does she, from whatever nightmares she has endured. You both can heal together. Heal each other. Learn to love not only yourselves but also the world around you."

Fenrys gazed towards the window behind his friend, his expression thoughtful. "She is afraid, Rowan. Her life hasn't been easy and it seems like she hasn't gotten to feel joyful much because so many good things have been taken away from her. One of them being..." Fenrys had to reign his anger in as he said, "Azriel."

Rowan nodded his head slowly, gesturing for his companion to go on. Fenrys inhaled a sharp breath in before continuing, "He pretended to be in love with her, Rowan. In love. And she believed him, she believed him and overlooked all the other signs like them not being mates in favor of loving him. But, all this time he was being a bastard who lied to her. What a little coward. I hate him for breaking her, for shattering her heart and making her doubt herself. I meant what I said, Rowan. I will kill him if I see him."

The prince shook his head slowly, "No, you can't kill him."

Fenrys' brows furrowed "What?"

"I said, you can't kill him. I won't allow you to."

Fenrys scoffed, "Please, don't act so almighty with me. If the roles were reversed and Azriel had done all that to Aelin, you would rip him to shreds."

Rowan smiled slightly, "True, but the roles aren't reversed, are they? So, I won't allow you to kill him"

"What?! That's just-"

"He has a mate, Fenrys. You can't do that."

"Like I care. That viper mate of his should also stay away from me if she values her life. She has just as much of a fault in this as he does. I will kill him, Rowan. I am sorry but I won't follow your order on this one."

"I said don't kill him but I never said don't beat him to the brink of death."

Fenrys' eyes widened as Rowan laughed and winked at his friend before getting up and heading towards the door, "You underestimate me, Fenrys. They hurt your mate so of course you should destroy him, just don't kill him and cause an extra headache for us all with a court that isn't even from our world. Oh, and...."

Rowan gave a final look at Fenrys before closing the door, "If they even manage to come here and try something, believe me Fenrys, they will be going back home with broken ego's and shattered bones. Whether or not y/n will be going with them is up to her."

The old house stood silent, its windows staring out like blank eyes into the night.

Y/n must have read this sentence for what feels like the millionth time in the book. Her mind was just too mixed up with other things that she couldn't even concentrate on reading a single sentence from a random book.

"You are reading 'Whispering Windows'? Gods, that's the most boring book I've ever read."

Y/n looked from her place on the couch to see Manon and Eva entering the room as the younger girl made a disgusted face at the book y/n was holding.

"What, you don't like it?"

"Like it? The whole plot is so predictable that by the end when the supposed plot twist happens, you already expected it."

Manon came and sat beside y/n as Eva lay down on the carpeted floor, propping her head on one hand. The witch smirked after taking a peek into the book y/n was reading. "Don't worry Eva, it seems like y/n hasn't even gotten past the first page yet."

Y/n sighed and put the book down, "Yes, can't really concentrate right now."

"Why not?" Eva's voice sounded curious but Manon gave a knowing look at y/n as she said, "Because her mind is currently elsewhere. Something having to do with a certain mate perhaps?"

Eva's eyes widened and she immediately jumped up before y/n could even answer the question, "You have a mate?! Since when?! Is it Fenrys-"

Y/n quickly put her palm on the girls mouth, shutting her up, as she hissed, "Yes, and I would appreciate it if you wouldn't go around shouting it for all to hear."

She brought her palm down from Eva's mouth as the girl whispered, "Fenrys is your mate? Oh Godsss!!"

"Calm down, it's not like either of them has accepted it yet." Manon crossed her arms as she looked expectantly at y/n.

"How did you-"

"Know? Hmmm, I have my ways." the queen winked at her before nudging her on the ribs, "So, what will happen between you two? Are you planning on accepting it?"

Y/n tilted her head backwards on the couch and closed her eyes.

"Uh-oh."

Y/n's eyes opened once again as she looked at Eva "What?! I didn't even say anything yet."

The girl shrugged her shoulders before smiling, "You don't need to. Your posture just told me everything I needed to know and then your delay in answer proved me right."

Y/n and Manon both looked at her with slightly wide eyes as the former whispered, "Wow"

Manon turned to look at her once again, "You are going to reject the bond?! Why?"

Y/n sighed, "I went and talked with the Book of Breathings earlier today and turns out my mother was the one behind it all from the start. She knew I had a mate here so she managed to get me sent to this place, effectively making my and Fenrys' paths cross and that just gave me the answer I needed. Assured me of my choice."

"Which is?"

Y/n looked at both of them beore saying in a steady voice, "No."

"What?!"

"Why?!"

Both the queen and the girl shouted at the same time, still looking surprised by her choice.

She put her palm over both of their mouths' as she said, "If you will just shut up and allow me to talk, I will explain."

Once they both stayed quiet, y/n let out a breath and said, "As I mentioned, my mother had a hand in this, in us crossing paths. That's why I feel as if I have forced myself upon Fenrys. If I accept this, I will force him to be with me because we didn't meet naturally. I am afraid that at some point, he will realise this and stop feeling all those things for me and leave like Azriel did. Like everyone always does-"

"I will have to stop you right there." Manon's voice sounded firm yet reassuring and determined as she placed a hand on y/n's shoulder.

"I understand your fears. You have had some hard times in your life it seems, and have loved the very few things you considered good. Such as those fae and especially Azriel. But, they left you alone after you have loved so much and been so vulnerable that now you find it hard to open up again. But believe me, y/n. That isn't your fault at all. They didn't leave because you were mean, bad, unusual or something else but because they themselves are the problem. They are the liars and hypocrites. Not you."

When y/n opened her mouth to say something, Manon put up a hand and said, "Now, as for the whole being sent here situation, if not now then when? If your mother wouldn't have done what she did at that exact time to get you here then when, exactly would you have a chance to come here again? To cross paths with Fenrys? He adores you, y/n. He is ready to go to the ends of the world as long as it's with you. Believe me, Fenrys has changed so much for the better since your arrival. No one has had this effect on him but you. Only you."

Y/n's eyes watered slightly as Eva hugged her silently and Manon squeezed her hand with a reassuring smile, "Just think about it."

Y/n gave her a small smile in return as she nodded her head and sat with them in a comforting silence a little more, thinking over what Manon just said.

It was sunset when she was sitting in the gazebo, staring out into the ethereal view of flowers and other plants. Her surroundings were so serene and peaceful, contrasting with her inner turmoil as y/n was once again, lost.

"May I?"

That voice that always caused a warm feeling to envelop her. That calm yet deep voice that never fails to make her squirm in her seat. The only voice that ever made her feel such things.

Fenrys' voice.

Y/n lifted her head up to see him standing in front of the gazebo, a small smile on his face, looking as angelic as ever. She managed to smile back and nod her head.

He came and sat right next to her, his comforting scent invading all her senses as she couldn't stop her body from leaning against him causing Fenrys to immediately wrap an arm around her waist and put his head on hers.

She felt so safe in his arms. So safe and protected, as if no harm could ever come to her as long as she was with him. And truthfully, y/n did start thinking that it was like that. But then again, another small part of her was still unsure, still telling her that this would never end well. That this was a forced story.

"You seem deep in thought"

His voice that seems to turn gentle only when talking to her brought her back from her thoughts as y/n asked him the question she has been dying to get an answer for.

"Are you truly happy to have me as a mate?"

"Where is this coming from?"

"I don't know, just.... I don't know"

She felt him pull her slightly away so that they can look at each other. Fenrys' brows were furrowed as he looked expectantly at her.

Y/n sighed, "I- I just- forget it."

"No, I won't forget it because you will tell me what is causing you any trouble so that I can smooth it out."

Her eyes widened, "You care about me that much? You- you would try to solve my problems for me?"

Fenrys' arm around her tightened as he said, "Of course I care about you. In fact, I more than care about you. Your troubles are my troubles and so, I would do everything in my power to get rid of every single one of them until you are feeling at peace. Feeling safe-"

"I do feel safe, Fen. Whenever I am with you is when I feel safe."

He seemed to be surprised about that because now it was his eyes that widened. "You do?"

"Of course I do, Fenrys. I feel safe, cared, supported, appreciated and even loved whenever I am with you. You have shown me the love no one has ever shown before. That's why I am afraid that you may doubt this at some point in the future. I am afraid that you- that your feelings will change and you will also leave-"

Her words were silenced by Fenrys' lips on hers. He kissed her fiercely, full of adoration and passion while his hand kept on caressing her back.

When he pulled away from her, his breath heaving, as he put both of his hands on each side of her face, "Never say such things ever again. I would never and I mean never knowingly hurt you. I would rather get my skin ripped off my body than ever betray you, princess. I am ready to spend an eternity with you, I will accept it right this moment, even. But I am more than willing to wait until you are ready to make a choice."

A tear slipped down her eye before Fenrys kissed it away as y/n smiled at him, feeling so warm after the confession he made. "I think- I think I know my answer, Fen. I just need a little more time to be sure."

Fenrys smiled brightly and kissed her other cheek as he pulled her back into his chest and put his head back on hers. "Once you are ready, I will be here, waiting and ready to soothe your doubts."

Once they arrived to dinner, the room was full with everyone chattering and discussing things, Dorian's voice loudest of all as he mentioned that there were only two days left until the lunar eclipse now.

"Well, with two groups, I believe we have a chance at winning." Lysandras confident voice filled the room as she playfully hit the back of Dorian's head while passing by his chair.

Y/n sat down next to Fenrys as she asked no one in particular, "Who is going where?"

Dorian smiled brightly and pointed to himself as he said, "Of course, the one and only me, Eva, Elide, Yrene and Lucien are staying with you. The rest are going after the valgs."

"And me." came Fenrys' voice from beside her, full of determination.

Aelin cleared her throat, "Fenrys, you can shift. You would be more helpful with us-"

"I am staying with y/n."

"Fenrys-"

"No."

"Fenrys," y/n put her hand on his, causing him to look at her, his gaze immediately softening.

"Please, you will be more helpful in the fight against the valg."

"But-"

"I will be fine, Fen. I won't be alone, right?"

Yrene nodded her head "Of course, we will be with you every step of the way."

Y/n smiled and looked back at him. "See? You shouldn't worry about me."

He sighed and clearly was willing to protest more but one look from y/n caused him to give her a resigned nod.

After a while, as everyone kept on talking, y/n noticed that Petrah seemed to be smiling which was the most unusual thing ever because y/n never saw her smile fully. One look at Lucien confirmed what she thought. He told her that they were mates and from the small shake of his head that Lucien gave y/n, she understood that neither of them haven't accepted the bond, just getting to first know more of one another. Just like her and Fenrys, it seems.

As the dinner went on, y/n's doubts were mostly fogotten as she immersed herself in the endless conversations happening around her, feeling more at home than she ever had. And through it all, she felt Fenrys' firm yet reassuring hold on her hand, his presence like a light at the end of the dark tunnel.

Y/n knew that this was far from over, that they had trouble coming in two days but right in this moment, she was more than ready to face whatever that was coming as long as she had Fenrys by her side.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

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[leiawritesstories]

I Won't Call It Love, Part 1

hi @shyvioletcat!!! happy rowaelin yulemas!!! you love baby fics and idiots to lovers so...here's both of those tropes! This is part 1 of probably 2 parts :))

Word count: 2.1k

Warnings: NSFW, swearing, reference to infertility, pregnancy

Enjoy!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Hey.” Tucked into Rowan’s side, snug under the blankets that spilled out of the hammock, Aelin tipped her face up, catching her boyfriend’s eyes. Boyfriend. Gods, it still made her giddy to call him that, the title they’d settled on so recently. 

“Hey.” Beneath the blankets, his hand slid lazily from her waist down to her hip, fingertips just barely grazing the dip of her spine. “What's up?” 

She let out a soft sigh and curled closer into his warmth, watching the embers of the campfire flicker out. “I like this.” 

“Me too.” He grinned at her, a flash of wickedness edging his expression, and tugged her more solidly onto his lap. “I like it a whole lot.” 

“You’re a bad, bad boy, Rowan Whitethorn,” she teased, arching her hips ever so slightly into the thickness she felt pressing up into her from below. “I thought we agreed to keep this casual.” 

His hand on her back grew heavy, and he pressed her hips into his in a slow, languid roll. “Does keeping it casual mean I can’t touch you like this, Ae?” He dipped his head, breathed a feather-soft kiss behind her ear. “Do you want me to stop?” 

“I…no,” she managed to gasp, lost already in the feel of his hands on her skin. She’d had dreams like this for years. “We talked about that, Ro.” The teasing lilt returned to her tone, and she sat up enough to playfully flick his nose. “We’re casual, but we’re boyfriend and girlfriend, and as long as we’re together, we’re only with each other.” A brief, haunted spark danced through her eyes, gone as soon as it appeared. “And if we decide this doesn’t work, then we go back to being friends. Right?” 

“Right.” He tugged her slowly back down against him. “But you didn’t answer my question, Ae. Do you want me to stop?” Her hips nestled into his once again, and she barely suppressed the moan that sprang up her throat at the feel of his cock pressing into her. 

“Don’t stop,” she whispered. “I—mmh, Rowan.” Her thoughts garbled into nonsense. She’d buried her feelings long enough. 

He smirked into her neck, his lips brushing the sensitive skin there. “Whatever you say, princess.” 

A moment of clarity broke through her lust-clouded thoughts. “Ro, I—mmh—we’re in a hammock, buzzard. This definitely isn’t stable enough.” She sucked in a jagged breath, let one hand drag down his side and dip into the waistband of his sweatpants. “Not for the things I want you to do to me.” 

“Fuck, Aelin,” he groaned, catching her wrist before she could warp her fingers around his dick. In one smooth roll, he was out of the hammock, and he hoisted her into his arms without effort. “And what kind of things…are those, hmm?” 

She looped her arms around his neck and pressed her lips up against his ear as he kicked open the door to the cabin. “Filthy things.” 

“Good girl,” he rasped out, lengthening his strides and crossing the small, open-concept cabin in barely three steps and splaying her out on the bed. 

“You’re wearing too many clothes, Ro,” she teased, sitting up so she could kick off her shoes and pants. Before she could roll her sweats off her legs, he stopped her, heat burning in his eyes. “Having second thoughts?” 

“Hardly.” He threw his sweatshirt across the cabin floor, his shoes following. “I want to do it.” 

She raised a brow. “That’s the whole point, buzzard.” 

“Not like that,” he huffed, catching the mirth in her eyes. “Like this.” He skated his warm hands up her sides, tugging her sweatshirt up as he went. And he stopped short, sucking in a gasp and staring at her breasts. 

Her bare breasts. 

“What?” She shrugged irreverently. “I don’t like wearing a bra when I’m in my comfy clothes.” With a wink, she added, “And I might have had a plan for this little trip.” 

“Did you, now?” His eyes dilated into darkness as he tugged her sweatshirt off and threw it across the floor, then hooked his fingers into the waistband of her pants. “What kind of plan, love?” 

“This kind.” She smirked, then gasped as he dipped his hand between her thighs, his thumb finding her clit with remarkable speed even through her little scrap of lacy panties. “Yes, Rowan. Yes.” 

“That’s my girl,” he murmured, and tugged her sweats off with one hand while the other continued to draw lazy circles over her clit. 

She groaned his name and wrapped one hand around his wrist, leading his fingertips inside her panties. He caught her gaze, a question written in his look, and she nodded her confirmation as she reached up to kiss him. Rowan braced himself on his free arm and kissed her slowly, his tongue tangling lazily with hers, and she sighed into the kiss as her body melted into the mattress beneath the hard press of his. Unbidden, his fingers curled against her pussy, and she nodded breathlessly, her hips shifting against him. 

“Show me what you like, Ae,” he breathed, hooking his fingers into the waistband of her panties and sliding them off of her. 

“That might be the hottest thing you’ve ever said to me,” she chuckled. Her humor rapidly gave way to a moan as she trailed her fingers down her body, curling around her sensitive nipples and drifting to her wet pussy. She traced patterns on her clit with one hand and let the other slip down, dipping two fingers into herself and watching Rowan’s cock strain through his boxers as he watched her fingers sink effortlessly into her cunt. “Like this,” she managed to say, moving her fingers at an increasing pace, twisting and curling them inside herself. 

“Fuck me,” he groaned, and he pulled her fingers out of her pussy and replaced them with his thicker ones. He licked her wet fingers, his eyes rolling at her taste, and curled his fingers upward, matching the rhythm of her fingers on her clit. 

“Fuck me,” she moaned, rocking her hips into his touch. “Can I?” Her free hand reached towards his cock, and he nodded as he slipped a third finger into her cunt. 

“Yes.” 

“Oh…fuck,” she gasped, going speechless at the sight of his dick. She pushed his boxers off completely and traced a soft touch up the underside of his thick, hard cock, making him grunt and jerk towards her touch. “Are we…?” 

“Don’t worry.” His fingers hit a spot that had her seeing stars, and she gasped his name. “That’s right, love, tell me who’s making you feel like this.” She wrapped her fist around his dick and stroked, and he tipped his head back and groaned. “So good, love. Yes. It’s gonna fit.” 

She looked like she was about to protest, so he swallowed her next words with his tongue in her mouth and curled his fingers, and a tremor rocked her body. “I…Rowan, I’m…” 

“Come for me, love,” he whispered into her neck, and she clenched around his fingers and did just that. He worked her through it, stopping to catch her hand and lift it from his cock. “Fuck, Ae, if you keep that up I won’t last thirty seconds.” 

She laughed quietly, still catching her breath from the orgasm. “Ah, Ro, I think you have better stamina than that.” 

“Damn right I do, Ae.” He kissed her softly and cupped her tits in his hands, the calluses on his fingers scraping gently against the delicate skin. She moaned, her body writhing against his, and he smirked. “Ready?” 

“For you?” Her smile went soft. “Yeah. I’ve been ready for a long time.” 

“Fuck, Fireheart.” His thumb skated up the curve of her cheek. “I think I’ve had dreams where you said that to me.” He notched his hips into hers, his dick nestling against her slick pussy. “I—wait! Fuck. Condom?” 

A shade of sorrow passed through her eyes. “It’s fine, Ro. I’ve pretty much been told that I can’t get pregnant.” 

“Aelin,” he whispered. “I’m sorry, love.” 

She shook her head. “It’s alright, Rowan. There’s lots of ways to have a family.” As she said that, his dick nudged her cunt, and she chuckled. “Someone’s eager.” 

“Fucking right, someone’s eager,” he returned. She guided his dick to her entrance, and he rolled his hips, slowly fitting himself inside her. “Gods.” 

“Fuck,” she gasped, breathless at the sensation. “So full.” 

He groaned, a garbled rendition of her name, and at her nod, started to move. He drove his hips into hers, once, twice, and…well. “Fucking gods, Ae!” He cried out her name and came inside of her after less than a minute. 

Silence stretched between them. 

Then Aelin turned her head sideways on the pillows and burst out laughing, Rowan’s dick still inside of her. “Oh gods,” she gasped through her laughter. “When I said I wanted you to do filthy things with me, love, I didn’t mean for you to two-pump chump it.” 

Rowan blushed scarlet, but a chuckle escaped him despite his efforts. “I’m never like this,” he groaned, dragging his hands down his face. “Fuck me.” 

Aelin chuckled and pushed herself up to kiss him. “There’s more than one way to make a woman orgasm, as you know.” She winked wickedly at him. “Lucky for you, I brought a battery-powered boyfriend.” 

“You really did have plans, didn’t you?” He finally pulled out, and he reached over and picked up her toy from the nightstand. 

“I did indeed.” She let her legs splay apart. “You gonna just make me lay here?” 

“I could.” He smirked. “But I won’t. C’mere, gorgeous.” 

~

The late-September breeze raised a soft pink on Aelin’s cheeks, but it wasn’t cold enough for her to start wearing a jacket yet. The bells on the coffee shop’s door tinkled as she swept in, waved at Elide behind the bar, and headed towards her and Lysandra’s usual table. 

“You’re late, babe,” Lys said, raising a perfectly threaded brow. “Did that man of yours keep you up late?” 

“You’re the worst,” Aelin grumbled, gratefully taking a sip of the latte in front of her. “I walked here from the office, you know.” 

Lys snickered. “I’m just giving you shit, Ae. But I do want to know.” She widened her green eyes and propped her chin on her hands. “Because if he hurts you, I’ll rip his dick off.” 

“That’s graphic,” Aelin drawled. “And we’re…” She trailed off, a glow that had nothing to do with the fall air brightening her face. “We’re great. I won't say it yet, but I think I’m in love.” 

Lysandra cheered. “Atta girl! Give me all the dirty details.” 

“Freak,” Aelin laughed. “I can’t stay, Lys. I have my appointment in half an hour.” 

“Damn,” her best friend sighed. “Fine. We’ll go for drinks later, then?” 

“Absolutely.” Aelin picked up her coffee and waved. “I wouldn’t miss Tuesday girls’ night for the world.” 

“See you then!” Lys waved as Aelin left the coffee shop. 

Aelin went back out to her car, parked a few blocks away. She had yearly appointments with her gynecologist, and she was used to them by now. She’d been seeing Dr. Towers for a good five years, since she was diagnosed with adenomyosis at twenty, and she was glad to have the reassurance of her doctor, even if her condition was a heavy one. 

She arrived at the clinic fifteen minutes later, checked in, and waited for a while before the nurse came out and called her name. Aelin followed her back into the exam room, and she set down her bag and went to the restroom. The nurse handed her a small sample cup. 

“You know the drill,” she said with a little smile. 

Aelin smiled back. “Yep, I’ve been here enough times.” Pregnancy screening was a normal part of every appointment. It had never meant much to her—it still didn’t, not when she and Rowan were only a few months into an official relationship. She took care of things quickly and went back into the exam room, where the nurse took her vitals and went over a few things with her before Dr. Towers came in. 

“Hi, Aelin.” The doctor’s usual gentle smile was absent. 

Aelin’s brows furrowed. “Is something wrong?” 

At that, Dr. Towers broke into a beam. “Not at all.” She set down her laptop and took a pregnancy test out of her pocket. 

A very positive pregnancy test. 

“You’re pregnant, Aelin.” 

The world went silent. 

“Th—that’s not possible,” Aelin whispered. She tucked her shaking hands under her legs to hide them from view. “I…are you sure?” 

Dr. Towers nodded, holding out the test. “I’m very sure, Aelin.” Sympathy warmed her expression. “Would you like to discuss your options, or do you want to have some time to process? We can schedule another appointment in a week or so if you need some time.” “I think I want some time.” Aelin’s mind began to settle, the one thing that she could fully grasp being Rowan. I need to tell Rowan.

~~~

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[acourtofquestions]

"Aelin is my heart."

[bubbles-for-all-of-us]

hi! just saw your recent fenrys post and was inspired! i was wondering if you’d be willing to do another fenrys x reader with the prompt “i was so worried. it was killing me not being able to reach out and touch you.” ? where maybe they met a few years before the war and ended up finding out they were mates but agreed to keep distance to keep each other safe? and the readers part of aelins crew and they reunite?

Little light

To the furthest parts of himself, Fenrys had to push you. Dimming all the memories you two shared. All the love he felt. Sniffing out the smallest of embers of your bond. He won’t lose you. Won’t hold your dead body. Won’t let you meet the end Rowan's mate had met. You were no one to him. You meant nothing. He didn’t think of you. He didn’t breathe for you.

While this couldn’t be further away from the truth. It felt as if someone was burning him alive. Ripping him to pieces. There were moments when he would stop, bending over as he growled in agony. “Be okay”, he would mutter under his breath, “Please be okay, my little light”. Pulling himself back up as he slowly bled inside. Slowly became a shell of himself.

When the war broke out all Fenrys wanted was to go find you instead of joining his brothers on the battlefield. That inner battle he faced seemed never-ending. He knew that he owed it to his cadre, to be there, to support them, to fight alongside them, but his heart was finally free to go to you. “I want to hold it against you”, Rowan had stated one night, “now that you told me, I can ask you to stay”. It was the side of Rowan with Aelin's thar had sent the floodgates open that had made Fenrys finally admit that he wasn’t a young and wild boy still chasing his dreams. He was a mated man. He was with someone, not just a lonely soul, still searching for its purpose. “Let’s have that meeting first”, Fenrys clapped Rowen on the shoulder, “Then I will make my choice”.

The truth was that he felt guilty, about bringing the war to your doorstep. So part of him screamed to fight, to kill every single leach, and then return to you. Because you deserved calmness, you deserved a safe world and Fenrys wanted to give that to you.

It’s the scent that flooded him even before the wooden door creaked open. As if someone had pushed his head underwater, as the last seven minutes of his life flashed in front of his eyes. In walked Aelin and then… “No”, Fenrys breathed, “No”. Your eyes snapped to him as a gasp filled your lungs. “Fen…”, you muttered. “My light”, he crocked out, killing the distance between you two in a couple of steps. Eager hands searched all over your body. As if you weren’t here. As if you were a blip of his imagination.

“My wolf”, you choked out, wrapping your arms around his neck as you pressed into him. “You’re here… you’re here”, he cried quietly, wrapping his arms around you. He let go now. Tearing through the walls he had built. Reaching out to you through his heart. Trying to fight for that desperate fluttering thread.

“I was so worried”, he breathed, cupping your face in his hands, “it was killing me not being able to reach out and touch you”. You smiled up at him through your teary eyes, “I was looking for you ever since you left”, you admitted, leaning your forehead against his. “You found me, my light”, he muttered, “Mother herself brought you back to me”.

[throneofsapphics]

misted realities

Rowaelin x f!Reader

Summary: Aelin pressed her lips to your forehead, running a thumb over your cheek. “We’ll be back soon, love,” she murmured - as if you might hear, and tucked the blankets tightly around you. A wicked storm was brewing outside. Not uncommon for this time of year, but it felt like a bad omen. 

Warnings: angst, injuries, mentions of torture/death, mentions of blood 

Word Count: ~8k

A/N: based on this request! reader is fae, has earth-based magic. 

“You never have time for me anymore,” you fought to keep your voice down, and clenched your fists to hide your shaking hands. 

“Gods,” Aelin sighed. “We’re all busy,” she did look exhausted, small circles forming under the Queen’s eyes. Days would go by when the three of you barely passed a few sentences between each other. At least between you and them. 

“I know,” you bit down on your bottom lip, willing the tears to disappear from the corners of your eyes. “I just want to spend more time with you.” 

“Don’t cry,” Rowan’s curt tone shocked you. Tears were replaced by anger, beginning to simmer deep inside of you. “You see us everyday.” He’s right, you sleep in the same bed each night. But, as soon as they come in - they’re ready for bed. When they wake, it’s lucky if you have mere minutes to speak with them before they’re gone. 

Your throat bobbed as you swallowed. “Right.” 

Rowan’s eyes rolled, but he strode towards you, one hand braced on your shoulder, the other cupping your cheek and tilting your head up to look at him. His eyes searched your face, thumb wiping away one of the stray tears. “We’ll talk about this later.” 

You took a step back, shaking off his grip. 

“It’s always later,” you spit out. 

Aelin’s fingertips rubbed at her temples as she glanced at the clock. “We don’t have time for this.” 

They never have time, not anymore. In the beginning, it felt like they would always make time for you - always time to go out into the forest, to go into the city, to just exist together.  Maybe you were being selfish, they’re the Queen and King of Terrasen for gods sake. But, where they used to seek you out, now you always chased after them and it was getting exhausting. Months of the same thing. 

“Don’t worry about it,” you let out a slow breath, but it did nothing to abate the tightness in your chest. Aelin frowned, lips pressing into a tight line. “I’m … I'm just overthinking.” 

Rowan’s look said; obviously, but Aelin still seemed a bit disgruntled. She glanced at the clock again. 

“We have to go,” she glanced over to Rowan. He gave her a soft smile, shot a nod your way, and looped his arm through hers before leaving the room. You stared after them, at the closed door. Never, they’d never left like that before. Not even a hug, or a i’ll see you later. Or have a good day. You clenched your fists at your side, gripping the fabric tightly. 

Space, maybe some time away from here would do you good. Ella had invited you on a trip, one you declined because you thought they would have a free day this weekend. But, at this point, who even knows if they’d want to spend it with you? You couldn’t put everything else on hold in the hopes that they might decide to grace you with their attention. If you remembered correctly, the trip began tomorrow. 

Slipping on your boots, you left the castle as quickly as possible - to find her and tell her to add one to the itinerary. 

It would be telling, that’s for certain. Either they’d miss you or … maybe realize they were better off without you. You prayed you could handle the truth, whatever it might be. 

-

“I’m leaving for a trip with my cousins tomorrow, I’ll spend the night at Ella’s. It’s an early start.” You stood in the door of the bedroom, fresh out of a bath, a pack slung over your shoulder. She’d been thrilled and shocked you decided to come along. Excited enough you felt some shame - shame that you hadn’t spent time amongst your family. That you’d focused so much on your relationship it surprised them you would go along. 

Aelin’s eyes flicked up from her book, her legs stretched across Rowan’s lap. “Be safe.” 

How long had they been out here? Not bothering to come say hello to you? Rowan gave a curt nod. It felt like a clear dismissal, and you took it. 

You gave them a tight smile, one they didn’t see, and strode for the door - shoulders back and head high. After you’d passed the gates, you realized they hadn’t asked where you were going, or when you would be back. 

-

The Oakwald was gorgeous this time of year. Brannon’s forest. It always felt … peaceful. Like a place you could come to to escape the rest of your thoughts. The trip had gone well, visiting a few old friends in a neighboring province. A week long trip, and one of the best weeks you’d had in a while. 

They were in the back of your mind, not consuming your thoughts, not constantly lingering in the front. All of your focus went to your family, your friends, and on spending quality time with them. It was a thing of beauty, and something that left you feeling revived. Alive again. You’d given too much of yourself to them, and received too little in return. King or Queen aside, you deserved more than half-assed attempts and short words. Your last interaction with them had sealed it. Anything you might have had at one point, had faded away. There’s no sense in drawing out something like this. No sense in you desperately begging for any scrap of affection or attention. You had more respect for yourself than that. 

You approached the next clearing, and the hair on the back of your neck stood. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Something here was off. You stopped at the edge, one hand palming the knife at your side, and scanned the surrounding treeline. 

“Down,” you shouted as a figure moved, your Fae hearing picking up the slight zing of an arrow string pulled taut. They listened, and dove to the ground behind some rocks. With another thought, the ground underneath the attackers shifted, rolling up to knock whoever it was off balance. You dove to the forest floor, arrows still flew, one lodging in your thigh - the other grazing your arm, head knocking against the rocks. Pain shot through your body, sending white spots through your vision - but you gritted your teeth and rolled, righting yourself up to a crouch. 

It all happened in seconds. Your right wrist, your dominant wrist, was broken - and you reached for your dagger with your left. You felt Ella’s distinct magic - a shield of wind coming to surround the three of you, and heard the sound of Edde’s bowstring pulling taught, and your own magic acting of its own accord. Sentient, almost. Maybe it was your subconscious guiding it. 

The rest passed in a blur, all you knew was fifteen bodies were left by the end of it. Five with arrows through their skulls, others with blue faces - like someone had ripped the air from their lungs, the rest strangled by branches and vines. Looks like the last three had gotten their wits about them and fled. The three of you fought together before, and had spent a magic-less decade together with the Wolf-Tribe. You knew what you were doing. Still, you had gotten lucky. They caught you by surprise. 

Edde was scouting the area ahead, Ella looking at your wounds anxiously. Neither of you could heal, none of your magic lent to that. 

“It’s fine,” you insisted. It was - surface wounds in all honesty. The biggest risk now was infection. As soon as you got to a healer, you’d be fine. “We can turn back-” 

“Going back will add an extra three hours,” Edde said as she entered, a handful of herbs in her hand. She chewed them, before packing them onto the wound on your arm, and ripping part of her shirt. “Crude, but it’ll keep infection away for now.” 

“I don’t want to go back.” You winced, trying not to sound like a whining child. If you made it to the next town, someone could easily send a messenger to Orynth with the information. Plus, there were sentries posted there. But … the threat was closer to Orynth, and you did have a moral obligation to inform them of any dangers present. Ella gave you a sympathetic look. You’d given them the run down about the status of your relationship in the beginning of your trip, and they knew you well enough to pick up that you didn’t want to speak about them further. 

Edde had a forced grin on her face, “I’m the oldest - and I say we’re going home.” 

You appreciated her attempt at humor, and sighed. Neither of them suggested shifting and going ahead - it might have been smart but the three of you were stronger together. Leaving one of them alone with you, injured, would be a risk - having one of you alone would be another risk, and you weren’t taking any of those. 

Battered, and bruised, your cousins helped you back to the castle, each of your arms propped over one of their shoulders. Edde had slung you over her shoulder for part of it, but when you sensed her strength waning you insisted on walking. The three of you had worse in the past, you could walk on an injured leg. The pounding in your head was more obnoxious anyway. 

Fenrys saw you first. Thankfully. You didn’t want to see Rowan or Aelin yet.

The male told the two of them to stay in place, actually said ‘don’t fucking move,’ and you didn’t argue as he swept you in his arms, mouthing a ‘sorry’ over his shoulder. They both shrugged, sending a knowing glance to each other. 

“Is there any chance you won’t tell them?” You mumbled. 

“Trouble in paradise?” He teased, his voice strained. You snarled at him, and he snorted. “You know I have to.” 

Even if he didn’t have to, he would. He barked an order at a passing sentry, and you kept your mouth clamped shut as he slipped between the folds of the world, your stomach churning. 

-

The poor messenger sent to the Queen and King was shaking. Rowan stiffened. He knew this male to be level headed, calm, and stoic. But here he was - shaking like a leaf, like a soldier after his first blood drawn. 

“Y/n,” he started, “is in the healers-” 

Aelin shoved him to the side and sprinted out the door. Rowan didn’t wait for him to finish either and took off after her. Their footsteps sprinted down the halls, silent on the stone as they ran faster than they ever had. They cleared through the hallways with ease, hands wrapping around the corners to propel themselves forward.

-

“We need to stop the bleeding.” One of the healers said, in a firm no-nonsense tone, and you yelped as she began undoing the half-assed bandages, giving an appreciative nod at the herbs. Your eyes shut closed, focusing on anything but the lashing pain coming from your thigh. At least the arrow was lodged well enough that keeping the piece inside stopped any bleeding. 

The door flung open. Rowan and Aelin stood there - pure panic and wrath coming from each of them. Rowan eyed both healers, with startling intensity. You fought back the words on the tip of your tongue - to tell them to leave, to get out of there. 

“Leave.” Rowan ordered both of the healers instead. You opened your mouth to protest, but he fixed you with a look and you shut it again. Testing him right now - at least in front of the other females, might not be a wise idea.

His predatory attention stayed on you as he made his way across the room. Aelin, however, kept an eye on the women, watching until the door closed firmly behind them, before rushing over to your side. 

Rowan managed to stay cool, but Aelin cursed under her breath as she took in your wounds. A broken wrist, a deceptively deep gash on your arm, part of an arrow stuck out of your thigh. You’d cut the rest off to make travel back a bit easier. 

“I didn’t think you’d care,” you said bitterly. Rowan ignored you - giving instructions to Aelin instead. Who, surprisingly, listened without questioning - fetching whatever items he ordered. 

“Tell me what happened.” He ordered, and you paused, tilting your head. He was focused on your wound, magic starting to swirl over your skin. “Now,” he didn’t look up at you. 

You let out a low exhale, but told him what happened, recalling every detail you could. 

“Does anything else hurt?” Aelin asked as Rowan finished up. 

“No,” you said quietly. Your head did, a bit, from impact - but you didn’t want them to think you’re weak, or complaining. The other ones were more serious, but healed almost as if nothing had happened, only scars in their place. You’d be sore for a few days, but that should be all. 

“Let’s get you to bed,” Aelin held out a hand for you. You reached to take it, but Rowan cut in - sweeping you up into his arms instead. You stiffened in his hold, but he only tightened, holding you close to him. 

They were both silent on the walk back, not that it mattered - you drifted into sleep almost as soon as your head hit the pillow. 

-

Aedion took in their report with a grim face, before sending out scouts to locate the survivors. Ones who managed to survive the three of you. Your cousins headed back out with them to show the way. He had instructed them to bring them in alive, if possible. 

He’d let them rot in the dungeons, let them fester until Aelin and Rowan got their turn. They wouldn’t make it out of there alive, he knew that for certain. 

-

Rowan had tossed and turned all night. Over the last week, he had no idea where you were or when you were coming back. He could’ve reached out to someone in town - one of your other family members, but he didn’t want to look like a fool. Like an idiot who didn’t bother to ask. Like what he was. 

Aelin was right that they were busier than usual, and had been for the last few months. But, they had a free day this weekend - and you knew that, but still chose to leave. They’d cleared that night for you, to get back and spend time with you. When they got there - he could hear you packing, and bitter anger started simmering inside of him. He thought you were running away at the first sign of trouble. 

First, you said they never had time for you, and when they did have free time - you left. It pissed him off. If he was being objective, he could see where you were coming from. He’d sworn to himself he’d make it up to you, when things calmed down. Gods, you’d moved in - at his and Aelin’s insistence - so they could spend more time together. 

You were younger, and hadn’t settled yet. Maybe he was an idiot - still thinking in years and decades while you were thinking in weeks and months. Three months to him was nothing. But … you didn’t have the full grasp on immortality yet. 

Regardless, you were back now - and safe. There’s no gods-damned way he’d let you leave that bed anytime soon. Not until you were completely healed and whole. He propped himself up on one arm, Aelin dozed fitfully next to you, one arm slung over your waist, her front pressing into your back, wrapping herself around you like she might shield you from the world. He brushed a few strands from your face, frowning at the small abrasion on your temple. He’d missed that, but it was mostly healed now - just a light pink scratch in its wake. 

In the morning, he’d say his apologies when you woke. You needed sleep now. 

-

“Y/n,” Aelin called, brushing her thumb against your cheek. You let out a slow breath, but didn’t open your eyes. Your heartbeat was still strong, breaths still even. 

“Let her sleep it off,” Rowan advised, already pulling a shirt over his head. They’d cleared their schedule as much as possible - only one meeting they wouldn’t be able to miss. He’d already arranged for sentries to be posted at their doorway, with orders to let nobody but them, Fenrys, or Aedion through. Two hours, and they’d be right back at your side. 

“Are you sure?” She asked, glancing up at the clock. It was nearly eight in the morning, and you’d knocked out around eight last night. In all honesty, if you’d woken up right then she would’ve said fuck it to the meeting. Even though the meeting had been called because of what happened yesterday. Her blood began to boil again. Aedion had assured her they were searching for the ones that had done this to you. And bringing them back - alive. But, given your cousins were on the hunt she couldn’t say what state they would be in. Fae can be especially ruthless where their family was concerned, and the three of you were close. 

Aedion stood in the door, partially blocked by Rowan’s figure as she ran a hand over your hair, smoothing through some of the tangled strands. She was surprised you’d even let her help you take a bath. Maybe you were too exhausted to protest. Aelin would’ve preferred for you to yell - to scream, anything besides the quiet silence you’d returned with. 

“Edde and Ella are guiding them.” She knew those names - your cousins. “I made them swear to bring them back alive.” Aelin almost laughed that he’d made the two females promise. 

“Let me know as soon as they return.” Rowan instructed, and slammed the door in his face. 

“That was rude,” she said absentmindedly. 

“He can handle it.” Rowan countered, stopping at the edge of the bed. She glanced up at him, but his expression was unreadable. Aelin reached out and squeezed his hand. They were both keeping a thin lid on their anger. 

“Yes,” he sighed, dragging her back to the present. “Her body needs rest.” 

Aelin pressed her lips to your forehead, running a thumb over your cheek. “We’ll be back soon, love,” she murmured - as if you might hear, and tucked the blankets tightly around you. A thought had a fire roaring in the corner. You needed to stay warm. It was still early autumn, but a chill had set in overnight, the temperatures dipping to just above freezing. Clouds had rolled in overnight, putting an end to the sunny few weeks they had. A wicked storm was brewing outside. Not uncommon for this time of year, but it felt like a bad omen. 

-

Rowan could tell Aelin was forcing herself not to sprint back to the room. They’d made a tentative plan - check on you, then grab a healer to come do a more thorough check. Something they should’ve done last night, but he couldn’t stomach the thought of anyone else near you in that vulnerable state. He’d barely kept his cool with Aedion in the doorway. Only knowledge of your friendship with the male and his blood oath to their Queen kept him from ripping his head off for being too close. 

Aelin pushed the door open ahead of him, spotting your form still sleeping on their bed, in the exact position they’d left you in. Something was wrong. You should’ve woken by now - or at least moved. You always tossed and turned in your sleep. But … you had been rather still last night. His pace picked up, overtaking Aelin as he yanked the covers back.

“Y/n.” He called, running a hand down your arm. Cold, your skin was cold. The room is warm - a fire still burning in the corner. Panic rose inside of him - your heart was still beating, breaths still even. He shook your shoulder lightly. He called your name again - louder. Aelin did as well. No response. Nothing. 

Aelin had darted for the door, he vaguely heard her shouting something at one of the guards in the hallway, the sound of other footsteps pounding down the hallway, but he couldn’t take his gaze away from you. Your lips, pale and cracked slightly. 

“Wake up sweetheart,” he tried keeping his voice gentle this time. Nothing. He shook you again. “Wake up,” his chest tightened, throat constricting. 

“Rowan,” Aelin’s voice vaguely registered, and he felt two hands cover his, holding them still. Aelin’s face came into his view, everything else blurred out around it. “Don’t shake her.” A pure command, rolling from his Queen. He didn’t bother masking any of the emotions in his face, he couldn’t - not now. 

He called your name again instead, Aelin slowly pushed his hands away from you. They hung limply at his side. His magic had checked over you at least three times and he couldn’t find anything. Why hadn’t he gotten a healer last night? Why weren’t you waking up? He should’ve asked about the cut on your head. Or have woken you up during the night to check on you. How many hours had he spent staring at you? 

He let out a low snarl as a healer stood in the doorway, turning to block her view of your body. 

“She needs her help,” Aelin said - gentle but firm. Reluctantly, he tore his gaze away from the healer and took a few steps away. The woman wasted no time rushing towards you. Another healer came in behind her. And another. He tensed at all of the new people - all surrounding you. Touching you. 

“Rowan.” Aelin snapped, and he met her eyes. “I don’t like it either. She needs help.”

When was the last time Aelin had been the voice of reason? Perhaps she was more in touch with her human side. 

“Reign it in or leave,” one of the healers - a female with a no-nonsense tone and stature barked. He pulled his power back in, unaware he’d let it reel from him. His eyes never left you, as he stood with his back to the wall. Centuries of self-control went into keeping himself in place. One wrong move and -

“Rowan,” he heard Aelin snarl. Reluctantly, he tore his gaze away from you to look at her. Keep it together. They’re helping. 

He took a few deep breaths. 

-

“We need water and clean towels.” The healer in charge announced. One of the younger ones went to move, but she held up a hand and sent a knowing glance to Aelin. Rowan had been a live fuse next to her. 

“Rowan, go get them.” She gave the order, but not pulling on the bond. She’d already had to do that once, to get him to stop trying to shake you awake. His eyes narrowed at her, but he listened. He needed something to keep himself from murdering everything within a foot of you. A basic command, to make him feel useful - to serve in the way Fae males needed.

She did wonder how she was the reasonable one in this situation. Not that she was feeling very reasonable. One threatening move from the healers … and she wouldn’t be responsible for what happened to them. The three of them were very aware of how on edge the two were. The one in charge was Fae, the other two humans - and seemed to be taking cues from her. Only focusing on reigning in Rowan kept her from losing her calm. 

This kind of fear … only when she’d almost lost Rowan those years ago - when he took the arrow for her, had she felt something similar to this. That’s when she realized he was her… Gods. 

No, no, no, a voice inside of her head screamed at her as she dropped to her knees, fingers digging into the carpet. Why now? When she was … The healers hadn’t turned to look at her. Nobody could see the war or anguish in her mind. Rowan returned, abruptly shoving the water and towels into one of their arms before he was at her side, arm wrapped over her shoulders. 

“I know fireheart,” he murmured. He doesn’t. He doesn’t know. A hand gripped her chin, and dark green iris’s met her own. “It’ll be fine,” he said with such conviction she believed wholeheartedly. It had to be. She wouldn’t accept any other alternative. 

-

You were in a murky fog, voices blurring over, shapes coming in and out of your vision. You spun in a circle - but it was all consuming. Was this your mind? Had it been scrambled somehow? Last you remembered, you were being tucked into bed by … you couldn’t put a finger on who. Then darkness. A sleep so heavy it pulled you under within seconds. 

Turquoise eyes ringed in gold. You focused on them, trying to pull yourself out of this abyss - towards the colors you recognized so easily. Who did they belong to? You couldn’t remember. The fog covered them again. Gone. You deflated. Would they come back? 

-

Fenrys frowned from the doorway. Rowan was pacing, the carpet looked worn where he walked back and forth. Everyone was on edge in the castle. In Orynth really. The scouting party sent word earlier that they’d arrive with the three remaining combatants tomorrow. When he told Rowan - a steely glint he recognized came over the male's eyes. He couldn’t find it in himself to feel bad for them, they’d deserve everything coming their way - and more. They knew who they were attacking. It wasn’t a secret you were Rowan and Aelins partner. 

 In all honesty, he’s surprised those were the only injuries the three of you sustained. Well, you were the only injured party. Eighteen against three. For humans, the odds would seem astronomical - and likely whoever it was had underestimated the fact that they were going up against well trained Fae warriors. Given how sweet and innocent you look, they probably thought you were an easy target. But, you’d seen the thick of the fighting in Orynth and survived ten years in Erilea with the Wolf-Tribe. 

The healers had given you ten days. Ten days before they feared there might be some kind of irreparable brain damage. 

More than anything, he wanted for you to wake - to be healthy and whole. Mainly because you were his friend. But, based on his conversation with Aelin the other night … there was more at stake. Once she told him, he realized the blood oath tugged a different kind of loyalty towards you as well. 

“Fenrys,” he heard her. He was still in Wolf form by their door, standing guard. Something he did without having to be asked. He blinked three times, using the old code from years ago; ‘are you alright?’

Two blinks, ‘no.’ She pressed her back against the wall, glancing up and down the corridor, before slowly lowering herself to the ground. He hadn’t seen his Queen look this lost in years. She had something to say - something she needed to, and he patiently waited for her to speak. 

“I hadn’t felt like this since Rowan took the arrow for me, and that’s when I realized …” Her head fell into her palms. He knew exactly what she meant. Fenrys shifted into human form, taking a seat beside her. “Is it even possible? Is this some sort of cruel joke? Is this my punishment?” 

She was bearing her heart, throwing it out on a platter. 

“It’s possible.” He answered her first question. The others, he didn’t know how to respond but … he tried. “Having a mate is never a punishment.”

“But .. Rowan.” He could hear the question; ‘is Rowan hers too?’ 

He leaned his head back against the wall, kicking his legs out in front of him. “Based on his … behavior. I’d be surprised if she wasn’t.” 

“Isn’t this typical for Fae?” 

The protectiveness, the desire to protect those they consider theirs, when they’re protective and vulnerable. But, he’s known Rowan for decades, and he’s only ever acted this way with Aelin. “It is, but he’s acting the same way he does with you.” 

Tension left her body in a giant wave. “What do I do? Do you think he knows?” 

Fenrys stilled. Whitethorn would know - he’d at least have a vague idea. He settled on, “he probably knows.” 

Aelin looked at him, waiting for him to answer her first question. “When have you ever let anyone tell you what to do?” He teased her. She rolled her eyes, and he could’ve cheered at the normal gesture. Something besides misery and pain.

“I was asking for advice, asshole.” 

Fenrys forced himself to focus back on the present. The healer looked like she was about at his limits with Rowan. She shot Fenrys a pleading glance. He really did admire her patience. 

“I’ll stay with her.” He heard Aedion from behind him. Backup, that was good. Rowan turned slowly, eyeing both of them with a predator's glance. Finally, he nodded at Aedion - giving his permission. If you were awake to see this, you’d probably rip him a new one. Giving permission for anyone else to be around you. If - when, you woke, you’d be in for a whole different world of territorial nonsense. 

Fenrys decided to take some initiative, and taunted Rowan. “You’re getting rusty, cooped up in here,” and shot him a shit-eating grin he knew would provoke a reaction. Sure enough, Rowan stormed out the door, jerking his chin for him to follow. Aedion shot him a sympathetic glance, and he elbowed the male harshly in the ribs. Although he told Aelin her husband probably knows, he’s not going to be the one to bring it up to him. That’s a journey they’ll have to take for themselves. For now, he’ll do his best to taunt some of the rage out of him - maybe make him more tolerable for the rest of them to be around. 

One thing Fenrys knows he’s good at, the best at, is pissing his royal Highness off. 

-

“Just come back.” A male said to you. The fog cleared slightly, and a blurry face peered down at you. A male with turquoise and gold eyes. Everything else blurred in and out, but the colors stayed. You could nearly feel the pain inside of them. “I know you’re mad at them, but they love you. They’ve been losing their minds, we all have.” You can’t remember who you’re mad at, or why. 

“Edde and Ella are hunting them down. They’ll be back tomorrow.” 

The names sparked something in you. A vague splinter of memory you tried to hold on to. Like water, it slipped through your fingers. You tried to speak - to scream, but your voice disappeared in the fog. The eyes withdrew from your view. 

-

“Can she hear anything?” Aelin asked - her voice still tight. 

“We don’t know.” The healer dismissed herself. 

She was tired of hearing that. We don’t know. We’re not certain. We can’t tell. 

Day seven. Three more days, the healers had given you three more days until they feared the damage was irreparable. 

But … they didn’t know how strong you were, not like she did. You’d survived ten years in hiding - you’d survived that last battle, the ambush - three against eighteen, survived dealing with her and Rowan’s bullshit. She refused to accept this kind of ending, refused to lose her mate - even if you didn’t know it yet. 

She imagined all of the concerns you might have, and all of the ways she would tell you you’re wrong. When you woke, she wondered if the bond would snap for you immediately. Probably not. She hasn’t found a good chance to approach Rowan about it - but she thinks he knows. And that he’s aware she does. Very little gets by him. She told Fenrys because she had to speak to someone, but saying it to Rowan felt too real. 

Aelin wouldn’t lose you. But knowing and having loved you, no matter how shitty she was at it, was better than never knowing you at all. 

She squeezed your hand. “Come back,” she pleaded, “please.” 

Her thumb gently traced your cheekbone. Cold. Over her shoulder, the fire was still going strong. There’s so many blankets surrounding you, she feared you might suffocate if she added another. Neither she or Rowan had slept well in the last week. They slept in shifts, always wanting one of them to be awake in case anything changed - in case you woke. The others ran the castle, letting the two of them get away with making an occasional appearance. 

They’d somehow managed to keep what happened underwraps. And they would - until they got their answers. Tomorrow, their new guests would arrive. Along with the rest of her court. She hated that she’d have to divide her attention away from you - to share her attention with anyone else. 

The ever changing scent hit the door, followed by a gentle knock. She tore her attention away from you, heavy legs carrying her to the door. 

Lysandra knew better than to try and come in without invitation. Even though the shifter was one of her closest friends, she still battled against her instincts to tell her to go the fuck away. 

Worry was evident all over the shifter’s face as she glanced at your form, surrounded by a mountain of pillows and blankets. Aelin couldn’t stop the small snarl beginning in her throat. Too long. She was looking too long. Quickly, Lysandra drew her attention back to her, and she shot her an apologetic grimace. 

“Any change?” 

Aelin shook her head, tears building in the corners of her eyes. She let Lysandra take her in her arms, hold her close and tight. 

“She’ll come back.” She didn’t sound too convinced. Aelin abruptly pulled back. 

“Don’t say that if you don’t mean it,” she snapped, and then winced, opening her mouth again. 

“You don’t need to apologize.” Lysandra said quickly. 

“No. I’m being unreasonable.” Aelin ran her hands down her face, looking back at you. She could still hear your heartbeat. Strong. Lysandra’s eyes dug into her. Her friend was always too perceptive. “Don’t say it,” she pleaded without looking at her. Of course she knows. 

“Is he…” 

“I think so,” Aelin interrupted her before she could say the actual word. Mate. Even thinking it brought pain - launching right through her chest, ripping it in half. “I don’t want to talk about it.” 

“Alright.” Lys’s tone said she very much believes she should talk about it. She’d tell her exactly where she could shove her beliefs if she pushed any further. “You need to go beat the shit out of someone.” Her friend said instead. 

Aelin slowly turned her head over her shoulder, raising one brow, “are you volunteering?” 

“I’ll find you a volunteer,” she winked at her, before heading out the door. 

“Get Aedion,” she shouted after her. 

Aelin flexed her hands. Maybe getting out some of the rage would be good. Fenrys and her cousin had alternated taking the brunt of her and Rowan’s pent up frustration and rage. She highly suspected they didn’t trust anyone else to take them on and survive the encounter. She looked back through the open doorway. You’d come back, she knew it. 

-

“It’s been ten days.” You heard a voice. Ten days, you’d heard that over and over again and knew it related to you. 

You had ten days to ‘come back,’ you’d figured out that’s what you needed to do. 

“Tell me how,” you’d screamed into nothingness. “I want to, help me” But you were lost, wandering around in this blurry half-reality. Voices and faces came in and out, words coming in fragments, sometimes in sentences, but nothing concrete. 

“We’ve done everything we can. It’s time to consider if…” 

Cries and screams; you’re wrong, she’ll come back, get the fuck out. Doors slammed. 

Two faces swarmed above you, clearer than before. Turquoise ringed with gold. Green. A name. They kept repeating a name over and over again. 

“Please, love,” a feminine pleaded. 

“We need you,” the male one added. 

“Help me,” you begged, “help me. help me. help me.”

-

Twelve days. The healers were still working with you - keeping your muscles from atrophying, pushing nutrient dense tonics down your throat, checking your vitals, using magic to test for other things. 

Brain activity, you still had that - but they couldn’t tell how much. Or how much of you would be left when you returned. 

The head healer sat down next to her, catching her attention. 

“What?” Aelin tried to keep her voice gentle, but had a feeling she failed miserably. To her credit, the woman didn’t look ruffled. 

“The only way she’ll come back now is if she wants to. She needs a reason to return, your Majesty.” 

The woman left before Aelin could ask any more questions. 

-

“The only way she’ll come back now is if she wants to. She needs a reason to return.” 

You wanted it, now you needed to find a reason. You paced, or at least you thought you did, in this mental prison. 

Isn’t wanting it reason enough? There’s something to return to. Names fluttered through your mind. You’d repeated them to yourself over and over again, unwilling to let them go. 

Edde. Ella. Fenrys. Aedion. Aelin. Rowan. 

The last two felt the strongest. You didn’t know who they were, but knew they needed you. If you disappeared completely, it would hurt them. Would hurt all of them. 

You glanced down at your arms, spotting the fresh white scar slashing one of them, and another smaller scar on your thigh. Others littered your body in various places. You’ve fought before, but not like this. Pitting your mind and will against whatever abyss this is. 

If it’s an abyss … maybe you need to build a ladder to climb out. You imagined strands of turquoise, gold, and green swirling in front of you, forming a link. As you reached out, they disappeared on touch. Frustration wouldn’t help you now. You would do this. You wouldn’t accept any other option. 

-

Fenrys leaned back against the wall in the dungeon, watching Rowan work before him. Lorcan stood to his left. He wasn’t surprised the male had shown up. He wouldn’t let Elide go anywhere alone, not since there’d just been an attack. Or in general. He wasn’t phased by anything Rowan was doing before them. Or what Aelin had done earlier. 

They’d gotten their answers days ago, now it was vengeance. 

“She’s their mate.” Lorcan said under his breath, so only he could hear. Not a question. Fenrys didn’t comment. Rowan was enacting the kind of wrath only a mated male could. The three males had already begged for death, several times. He didn’t feel pity, or any inclination towards mercy, but if he did he wouldn’t dare interrupt. Only a fool would. 

Part of him wondered if Rowan was making up for time he didn’t get to spend with Cairn. He wasn’t stupid enough to ask the question. Besides the attack on you, they’d learned several other vital bits of information from the males. At first, they’d made the mistake of bragging. Of what they planned to do to you - speaking to each other. Others might’ve called it stupid to keep them together, but the demi-Fae guards posted could hear every one of their ‘whispers,’ and the things they’d reported made him sick and furious.

They were on day thirteen. The healers said ten. Rowan and Aelin wouldn’t give up. Others had started thinking in if’s, but they refused.

Lorcan nudged him, jerking his chin towards the door. He took one more glance at Rowan, still occupied, and followed. 

“What is it?” He crossed his arms as they left earshot. Lorcan had a … look on his face. Strange, considering the bastard usually never showed any kind of emotion. Worried? He wasn’t particularly close to you, and had only met you on a few occasions. 

“Do you think she’ll wake?” 

“Yes.” He replied instantly. “There’s no other option.”

Lorcan let out a slow breath. “If they lose her …” 

“I know.” 

They might lose their Queen and King too. Everyone had thought of it, even if nobody dared to voice it. 

-

It wasn’t improving as quickly as you’d hoped it would. But - you could feel it. It was a physical thing, living and sentient almost. You let your fingers run over one of them, colors swirled together and shined. It was warm to the touch, and slid easily over your fingertips. You wrapped your hand around it, and it held firm. You reached for the next. It held. 

With the next one, you brought your hand up, your foot settling into the bottom ledge. It was working. You refocused your breaths and tilted your chin up. Endless mist covered your vision, only seeing where your hand landed next. 

Trust, you needed to trust that you could pull yourself out. Trust someone would be there to catch you. 

-

Aelin knew she was sleep-deprived, and figured the rustling from the room was a hallucination. She’d heard it several times while slipping out the door, only to rush back in and find you in the same position. 

Day twenty. Twenty days of hell, of waiting. There wasn’t anything she could fix, she could only hope and trust you were doing what you could. Gods, she spoke to you as much as she could. Aelin read books, talked about everything and nothing in hopes you would hear. There was only one subject she’d refused to approach, refused to speak aloud. Would that be the key? Could that be the reason you needed? The one that the healer had mentioned. She hadn’t told Rowan about the conversation … she swallowed harshly, and pulled her husband aside. Maybe now was the time to do it. 

Rowan read the look in her eyes and kicked everyone out of the room. 

“The healer told me that it’s … that she needs …” 

“She told me too,” Rowan interrupted her rambling. He gave her a tight smile, and pulled her into his chest. His chin rested on top of her head, and she leaned in to hear her heartbeat. “Are we going to acknowledge it?” 

She leaned her head back enough to meet his eyes, and took a breath before she said the thing haunting her mind for the last twenty days. “That we have another mate?”

Rowan nodded. She could see the relief flooding over his features, and imagined the same was showing on hers. He leaned in and pressed a kiss to her forehead. “This doesn’t mean I love you any less.” 

“I know.” She huffed out a laugh. You had two mates waiting for you, when you get back. Two who will burn the entire world down to get you back here if they had to. “We’ll get our mate back.” 

-

Mate. You blinked as you heard the word. So soft you almost missed it. Aelin and Rowan. 

You reached another hand, and could see the next ring, and the next. The world cleared around you. 

Soft cloth and fur covered you, you twitched your fingers - you could feel it. It was real. It had to be. 

Your eyes opened, and you shut them quickly. Too bright. 

A few seconds later, you squinted and slowly let yourself adjust. 

Gods, how many blankets did one person need? Your entire body was heavy and slow, but you managed to wiggle out from under the cloth mountain, making it to the edge of the bed. Had you been alone this entire time? Had you imagined Aelin and Rowan? 

Maybe a stranger had found you and brought you back. But … the room was familiar. Maybe this was another dream, a new reality your mind trapped you in. 

You let your feet hit the soft carpeted floor, pressing yourself up to stand. You felt surprisingly steady and took a few tentative steps. 

It was sunny outside. Gods, you needed to feel the sun on your skin - even if it’s fake, even if this isn’t real. 

Your hand gripped the doorknob, slowly opening the door to the balcony. A chilly wind hit you and you wrapped your arms tightly around yourself, ignoring the cold biting at your toes and skin as you took a step out. Based on the sun, it’s about mid morning - at least in this dream world. You wandered towards the railing, letting your hands travel over the wood - worn with time but still strong. 

Orynth, you recognized the city. Maybe this could be real. But if it was real … wouldn’t Aelin or Rowan be here? Or had they just shoved you in here out of obligation. Maybe the word mate was a figment of your imagination as well. Your mind telling you what you want to hear. Footsteps filled your ears and you whirled around, bracing your hands on the railing behind you. 

-

Rowan stilled. He could’ve sworn he heard a door open. But … lately his mind had been playing tricks on him. Him and Aelin both. He pressed a kiss to the top of Aelin’s head. Now that they’d actually said it out loud, it felt like there was a lot more to lose. 

Twenty days. There wasn’t any change - but at least there wasn’t any deterioration. He wouldn’t give up hope on you, he couldn’t. Gods, he couldn’t lose you. Fuck. 

He took a step back, running a hand over his face. They’d been out of the room for maybe ten minutes, but he still felt like he needed to have eyes on you at all times, lest he miss something. Even if it’s just a twitch of your fingers. Rowan would give anything for that - for any kind of movement. Your eyes had twitched behind your eyelids at some points, and he knew you were dreaming or seeing something. It gave him hope. 

“Let’s go back in,” he murmured, and Aelin led the way back towards the door. She cracked it open and froze, breaths coming heavier, before she shoved it back open, turning to him with pure alarm on her face. He pushed past her. 

Gone. The bed was empty. Impossible. Nobody could get in here - they’d been right there. Right outside. 

The balcony door was cracked open. Aelin spotted it a second before him, and he’d never seen her move faster. He was right on her heels. Pure terror and dread filled him. Has someone taken you? They could cover a lot of ground in ten minutes. Why the hell had he left you alone? 

He barely stopped himself from crashing into Aelin. 

You were there. Hands braced against the wood railing, eyes wide in confusion. Awake and standing. Your brows furrowed as you saw them, shoulders tightening. 

“Not real,” you murmured to yourself. His heart dropped to his stomach. You looked vaguely like a cornered kitten. They would have to be very careful, considering how close you are to the ledge. Subtly, he let a shield of wind surround them, one that would push you back if you somehow fell past over the edge. 

“It’s real,” Aelin whispered, taking a few steps towards you. He fought the urge to rush over there and grab you, to tug you away from danger. You panicked and confused. He should’ve been there when you woke, to see your pretty eyes open again. To tell you how much you mean to him. How he’s thought about you every second. How he never should’ve let you leave on those terms. 

You didn’t move towards them, but didn’t try and make more space, and Aelin took that as a good thing. She slowly walked towards you, and he followed a few steps behind. 

Aelin stopped a few feet away, and held out her hand. 

Ten seconds passed. 

Your gaze switched between her hand, Aelin’s face, his. He held his breath. 

Ten more seconds. 

You took her hand with a cautious smile and tentative hope on your features. 

“It’s real,” he repeated Aelin’s words from earlier. He watched your fingers squeeze, and you took another step forwards, closer. Aelin’s other hand came up, brushing against your cheek. Rowan watched as you melted into her touch, eyes closing as you let out a little sigh. 

His knees hit the floor, tears openly streaming down his face. 

[rizzoreads88]

✨People need to realllyyyy learn the difference between the words THOUGHT and PLANNED. ✨

🦇In Azriel bonus chapters he never says he hasn’t THOUGHT further then his fantasies about Elain he says he hasn’t PLANNED further. Since some people like to act like these words are the same let’s look at the actual definition.

(Real life example of what this looks like : before I started dating my husband I liked him so much I thought about him all the time. But I never once planned to actually make a move or planned to be with him because I was way too shy lol and I thought he was out of my league at the time.Did that take away from how much I liked him? Nope. Did that take away from how much I thought about him? Nope. And here we are years later having just celebrated our 10 year wedding anniversary in September)

🌸why would Azriel even be making plans for Elain yet? They are still friends at the moment that happen to be romantically interested in each other yet she is seemingly off limits. She has a mate. Rhysand reinforces this idea that she is off limits to Azriel. So why would he be making any sort of plans just to hurt himself even more feeling she is truly off limits?

🦇Now let’s look at the context of when this is said. When Azriel is talking to Rhysand he’s extremely frustrated. He’s been thinking about Elain for however long and they both made a move on each other and Rhysand stops it right before hand. Rhysand knows Azriel and Elain are interested in each other. He’s also been w Feyre as she’s talked about them a few times and he asks her not to get involved. He was there when Elain told Graysen she didn’t care about the mate bond. Everyone knows Elain is uncomfortable around Lucien. Rhysand knows Elain was about to kiss Azriel too. Not to mention Azriel has moved on from Mor a while ago and has found someone he likes that likes him back and yet again he cannot do anything about it. He sees Cassian and Rhysand with the woman they want but Azriel cannot even kiss the woman HE WANTS that wants him back…. I think we can all understand why he’s frustrated. A lot of what he’s saying is coming from frustration. Remember when Cassian was frustrated and said he didn’t ask to be shackled to Nesta? Do you think he actually meant he didn’t want to be shackled to her or was he just frustrated? Remember when Rowan told Aelin she would be better off dead and punched her in the face? Do you think he truly meant that? Or was he just speaking out of frustration? We know Azriel feels deeper for Elain. We are shown this in his bonus chapter as well…

🌸In Azriels bonus chapter we learn he thinks about Elain daily, he actually loses sleep over her. He saved her Soltice gift and looks at it every night, his razor sharp thoughts go quiet around her, he can read her without his shadows, he has a physical reaction to Eluciens mating bond and seeing her around Lucien, he questions his religion over Elain.. then days later when he’s in training around everyone he’s still upset over Elain… in acosf when cassian mentions elain and nesta fought Azriel has a reaction to it when elain is mentioned, in acosf when Nesta insults Elains personality azriel has another reaction, his shadows get ready to physically attack nesta for insulting elains personality…

🦇You do not feel all these things, do all these things, Be willing to die to get to them, then carry them while your bleeding out if you don’t care for someone. If it’s “just lust” Azriel would have tried to make a move on her long ago and left it at that. “Well it’s just crush” and what’s a crush? It’s when you like someone you are attracted too.

🦇🌸“Well he doesn’t mention having any sort of feelings for elain to rhysand in the bonus chapter” My brethren… it’s a bonus chapter. We are not going to get love or deep feelings confessions in a bonus chapter. Bonus chapters are hints at what’s in the books and hints at what’s to come. Just like in Nessians bonus chapter Cassian wasn’t professing his love to Nesta, he wasn’t thinking about how deeply he cares for her either. It was a interaction between them to show the attraction, connection and tension they had. We didn’t get their true feelings about each other until multiple books later. So obviously SJM is saving all of this for Elriels book too if they get one.

And I’m just going to end it with this. Cassian had thoughts of being jealous of rhysand and feyre and what they had too before anything happened with him and nesta… he was frustrated with how things were w nesta too before acosf and yet no one was like “oh Cassian only wants nesta because she a Archeron sister he just feels entitled to her and doesn’t really care about her”… but when azriel is jealous suddenly it’s bc he’s a desperate incel who feels entitled to women and only wants to sleep w them? Funny how that works.

[merymoonbeam]

A voice in the void, a secret and a quiet dreamer

Rowaelin:

"But I sent you to Wendlyn for the healing. And so you would ... find him. The one who had been waiting so long for you." Aelin's heart cracked. "Rowan." Elena nodded. "He was a voice in the void, a secret, silent dreamer. And so were his companions. But the Fae Prince, he was..." Aelin reined in her sob. "I know. I've known for a long time." "I wanted you to know that joy, too," Elena whispered. "How- ever briefly." “I did,” Aelin managed to say. “Thank you.

And we have Elriel:

The golden necklace seemed ordinary -- its chain unremarkable, the amulet tiny enough that it could be dismissed as an everyday charm. It was a small, flat rose fashioned of stained glass, designed so that when held to the light, the true depth of the colors would become visible. A thing of secret, lovely beauty. 

She arched a brow. He explained, “They pull people together. And bring them joy. They are a time to pause and reflect and gather, and those are never bad things.” Shadows darkened his eyes, full of enough pain that she couldn’t stop herself from touching his shoulder. Letting him see that she understood why he stood in the doorway, why he wouldn’t go near the fire. His secret to tell, never hers. Azriel’s face remained neutral.

And I will explain the "a voice in the void" part.

Elain was lost to the murky realm after the cauldron and being made. We now know it is because she was a seer.

Azriel had been the one who "freed" her from that murky realm.

But more importantly...before she was even freed from that murky realm, Azriel had focused her in a way if you look at these two scenes:

Rhys gave her a sharp look. But Elain said quietly, “The queen might come.” Silence. Elain was staring at the unlit fireplace, eyes lost to that vague murkiness. “What queen,” Nesta said, more tightly than she usually spoke to our sister. “The one who was cursed.” “Cursed by the Cauldron,” I clarified to Nesta, pushing off the archway. “When it threw its tantrum after you … left.” “No.” Elain studied me, then her. “Not that one. The other.” Nesta took a steadying breath, opening her mouth to either whisk Elain upstairs or move on. But Azriel asked softly, taking a single step over the threshold and into the sitting room, “What other?” Elain’s brows twitched toward each other. “The queen—with the feathers of flame.” The shadowsinger angled his head. Lucien murmured to me, eye still fixed on Elain, “Should we—does she need …?” “She doesn’t need anything,” Azriel answered without so much as looking at Lucien. Elain was staring at the spymaster now—unblinkingly. “We’re the ones who need …” Azriel trailed off. “A seer,” he said, more to himself than us. “The Cauldron made you a seer.”

Let alone this is the "you are a seer" scene which freed elain from the murky realm. The "unblinking" part is quiet important. Whenever Elain has a vision or talks in riddles she is blinking rabidly. A few examples...

So as you can see...she is looking at Azriel "unblinkingly"

Another scene is this:

But Elain shook me off, heading back to the stairs. She said as she climbed the first steps, “I can hear her—crying.” I gripped the bottom post of the banister. “Who?” “Everyone thinks she’s dead.” Elain kept walking. “But she’s not. Only—different. Changed. As I was.” “Who,” I pushed. But Elain continued up the stairs, that shawl drooping down her back. Nesta stalked from Cassian’s side to approach my own. We both sucked in a breath, to say what, I didn’t know but— “What did you see,” Azriel said, and I tried not to flinch as I found him at my other side, not having seen him move. Again. Elain paused halfway up the stairs. Slowly, she turned to look back at him. “I saw young hands wither with age. I saw a box of black stone. I saw a feather of fire land on snow and melt it.”

Feyre asks and asks...nothing. Azriel asks and she stops to look back at him.

And this whole parallel hits even harder when you think about how Rowan had a mate...but it was fake and there are MANY parallels with elriel and rowaelin. Such as these BANGERS.

So yeah...I think this is my top parallel find. I'm retiring. I cant top this.