#and I do love the idea of Victor in his Alice blue suit with his Smiler tie :)

[victorluvsalice]

Sims 4 Valicer Outfit Fun

So, as I said at the end of last week’s “episode” of the Chill Valicer Save, the next scheduled update, of the gang celebrating SimCity Founding in San Sequoia, is actually better-suited to be posted NEXT week, as it would fall then between 4th of July (the holiday SimCity Founding is based on) and Victor and Alice’s wedding date (for reasons to be explained in the update ;) ). So this week, I’m doing a post showcasing some new Smiler looks I made recently while saving an all-human Valicer trio to my Gallery (with the Smiler I mentioned curing of vampirism with MC Command Center back in the “Happy Smiler Creation Day” post), along with a couple of Victor and Alice looks! :)

First up, we have another variant on the Valicer In The Dark AU Smiler look -- this time we have the black hat, the yellow vest, AND the yellow shoes! And also that one bracelet that seriously looks a bit like something they’d make as official Smiler merch. XD I think this is pretty much the “final” VITD look for Smiler, though don’t quote me on that. :p

Here’s another idea for a “formal” Smiler look I came up with while playing around with some of the new clothes from the recent packs -- I’m like 99% certain that ruffled yellow shirt is from High School Years. It’s got some good vibes, but I’m not sure about the pure black shoes paired with those pure black pants. It feels a little too samey. Plus I wish the top hat was in a swatch other than “brown.”

There’s a similar problem with this “fancy party” Smiler look -- I really like the fancy purple vest and yellow tie combo, but those black pants and shoes. . .little too plain for my liking! That being said, I like the eye makeup I gave Smiler in this outfit --

Something about that soft pinkish-purple “glow” really suits them, I think! Though maybe for this outfit it should be a tad darker. . .we’ll see what happens as I continue playing around with stuff!

An “athletic” Smiler, with a neon-yellow hoodie and bright yellow sneakers I knew I had to use for them. I’ve been trying to get them more “yellow and black” looks to go with The Smiler’s official color scheme -- a process hindered by the fact that The Sims 4 doesn’t have a lot of great yellow swatches. And sometimes a really good item in yellow is paired with another item in a not-so-good color. *sigh* I really wish layered items, like shirts and vests, had swatches you could customize separately! Meh.

On the other hand, the sweater in this winter look is totally them. XD Not totally sold on the pants, but the bright yellow boots are nice, and of course I like the hat, given I used it earlier in their VITD look. :p

And here’s a very casual Smiler more appropriate for the summer heat -- perhaps the shirt is a bit paler than I’d like, but it’s got a good “chill” vibe! And I like the black sneakers with the colorful shiny stripes on them. :)

Onto some Victor looks, with one that I was playing around with trying to find a VITD outfit for him. It’s a little monochrome (which, uh, I guess DOES suit his source material), but it’s got a good vibe of “was once more formal, is now a little more casual“ with the open collar and whatnot. I tend to lean toward vest-based outfits for Victor, given he’s originally from a Victorian-esque film and sometimes it can be hard for me to picture him in more casual wear.

Case in point, I’m not sold on the belted jeans here, but the blue vest with its little stripey tie works for me! I tend to default to putting Victor in blue if he’s not in black or grey -- he feels like a “blue” person to me.

Okay, I’m not sure this one is really Victor, but I honestly love how silly he looks, especially with the shades. XD It’s like, he’s trying just that little bit too hard to be cool. In all senses of the word. XD

And now onto Alice looks -- though this first one, as you can see, is less of a “look” and more be playing around with body details. Specifically, this is me slapping on one of the new birthmarks in “skin details” on her shoulder because I think, in that particular color variant, it might sub nicely for the burn scar I’ve always headcanoned her having there. The actual body scars from Werewolves never fit because those were explicitly claw and bite marks, but this. . .yeah, it at least has the right vibes! Though, of course, if anyone can point me to any actual scars that might look more like burn scars, I’m all ears.

This was a “party” look I played around with for her -- I’m not totally sold on it, but I do kind of like how this dress, at least on the top, has sort of the opposite vibes from her standard Wonderland outfit. And it’s a good color combo for her!

And here we have a summer look for a more modern Alice -- I think this is a dress she’d wear, and the white-framed sunglasses go well with it! Though I just realized, the color scheme actually roughly matches Victor’s summer outfit above. XD Well, they do say that couples do tend to start dressing alike. . .

And yeah, that is your lookbook for this week! Hope you enjoyed, and hopefully I shall see you next week for SimCity Founding shenanigans in the Chill Valicer Save! :)

[spartanguard]

(love will see us through these) Dark Days [CSRT; 6/7]

Summary: A century ago, the United Realms of Pomem had been a land of peace, prosperity, and magic. Until war tore the land apart, leaving behind cruel leaders and even crueler laws regarding the use of magic. And each year, the youth of each realm are subjected to a fight to the death, both for entertainment and to weed out anyone capable of wielding magic. In the 99th Magic Games, past victors Emma Nolan and Killian Jones find themselves serving as mentors, while Alice Gothel and Robyn West end up representing their realm. Everyone has secrets; everyone has something to lose. Who will win? Who will die? Just don’t forget: all magic comes with a price.

rated M | 7.8k words | part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | AO3

A/N: We survived the games! and there’s only one chapter left after this—ahh! Thanks as always to @captainswanbigbang​ for hosting this event and the best beta ever @optomisticgirl​. Chapter title comes from “Kingdom Come” by The Civil Wars.

Important note: So, this is the chapter where things happen (in the past) with Killian and Eloise. While it's completely consensual, it's still not the greatest of situations (they're both victims, in this scenario). So if you don't want to read that, then I advise you to skip over the flashback at the end.

part 6: Don't you fret my dear; it'll all be over soon / I'll be waiting here for you 

Alice felt like she was going to be sick. But at the same time, she didn’t feel much—like all her senses were muted somehow; like she was covered in a see-through blanket. Absentmindedly, she scratched, yet again, at the new bracelet on her arm.

“Stop it,” her mother scolded, swatting her hand away. “You’ll get used to it,” she added, a bit softer.

Alice glanced over at her mum, who was now toying with her own cuff. From the outside, it was beautiful: made of beads woven together in shades of orange that matched Eloise’s hair and, at least at the moment, matched the floral pattern that covered her flowy gown. When Alice was little, she would stare at it in awe, thinking it was merely a beautiful accessory. Now, she knew better.

And god, she understood her mother that much more. Alice’s was equally gorgeous—a sea of blues that mimicked the color of her (and her papa’s) eyes, and nearly blended into the stunning turquoise ball gown she was wearing. She now knew that those beads were made of silicon, and the wires and metal holding it together were all part of the circuitry used to block the release of magic. But it felt like her body was rejecting it, and rightly so; it was literally suppressing a part of her that had been there her whole life. So while her mother’s attention was diverted, she snuck another scratch in.

She nearly jumped when a hand closed over hers. “Easy there,” Robyn whispered, giving her a soft smile. “I’ve got ya.” She squeezed her hand over Alice’s, and even though it didn’t do much to relieve the itch that felt like it was burrowing into her soul, it was soothing nonetheless. 

“Thanks,” she said, returning the tiny grin. Even though the games had ended a few days ago, it felt like they’d barely spent any time together. They’d curled together on the hovercraft, but the trip from the Arena back to Olympus was depressingly short, and they’d been split apart almost immediately and taken to recover separately.

She’d no sooner been hurried into a hospital room than a crude cuff had been slapped on her wrist, immediately stifling her magic. Cruelly, her mother had been the one to fit her with the current, permanent model a day later, while she was still hooked up to all sorts of IV drips that were supposed to heal all her injuries and make up for malnourishment.

Eloise hadn’t said a word when she put it on her, and didn’t linger to talk with her about it. No words were really needed, but Alice couldn’t shake the feeling that her mother had put a pillow over her face at the same time.

(Her papa visited too, later that night when no one else was around; he’d held her as she cried into his shoulder, just like when she was a little girl and her first rabbit died. But this was so much worse than a pet, and she’d been the one to do the killing here and...god, she still couldn’t think about it much.)

That feeling of muted senses hadn’t yet abated, or even thinned, so she’d taken to studying things even harder, focusing on every detail; right now, she was staring at Robyn’s dress, noting the bit of tulle poking out from under the bold red taffeta at the hem, the tiny red gemstones that dotted the full skirt, and the almost fire-like pattern they made over the strapless bodice. Alice’s dress was made in the same pattern, but the colors were a complete contrast. She had to give the dressmakers credit for that bit of coordination. She didn’t know how many times she’d traced over the seams and stones of hers, just trying to make sure she could still feel; amazingly, she hadn’t messed anything up yet.

“Are you girls ready?” Eloise asked, standing by the door of the small room they stood in. They could hear a bit of the hubbub coming from the other side—from the Victor’s Gala. (Because it wasn’t enough that they had been interviewed again on live television after winning; no, they had to be paraded around for the sponsors and other past victors, too. At least the interviews hadn’t had an audience this time.)

Alice wasn’t sure she was ready to talk again, having only barely made it through the interview without stumbling over her sentences. Robyn, blessedly, picked up on that. “Yeah, we are,” she answered for both of them.

“Then go ahead. You’re on.”

Eloise opened the door just in time for them to hear Sidney Glass announce their names from the room beyond. Once again, the large room on the first floor of Tribute Castle had been transformed, now into a glittering ballroom. 

Robyn squeezed her hand and led them out, which was good, because she probably would have ran the other direction without her there. Hopefully no one noticed her delayed reaction, but she quickly plastered on her show grin and waved as Sidney guided them to the dance floor. 

It was an antiquated tradition that the Victor opened the gala with a first dance, usually with the Gamemaker, but since there were two winners, the mortification was theirs to share alone. 

“Let the dance begin!” he announced, and an orchestra started to play somewhere. For a moment, she and Robyn just stared at each other, giggling. But the rhythm was familiar, thankfully, so she guided Robyn’s free hand to her shoulder, placed hers on Robyn’s waist, and whispered “Follow me.”

There were only a couple missteps as they glided around the floor; Robyn was a quick study, and the more they moved, the more the nervous butterflies became a different kind of flutter in her stomach. 

Robyn must have picked up on it, because she slid her hand from Alice’s shoulder to her waist and wrapped it around her back, tugging her closer. “Doing okay?” she whispered in her ear.”

“Yeah,” she murmured back. “It’s just awkward, is all—everyone watching us.”

“I know; it feels like a wedding,” she said, giggling a bit.

Alice didn’t entirely hate that idea, if she was being honest, and blushed a bit at the idea; her mum would scold her for being too young or something but she was still Killian Jones’s daughter, too; she’d inherited his entire sappy side. 

Robyn was blushing a bit, too; it matched the red jewels that dotted her skin. “Just how did you learn to dance like this?” she asked, seeming to want to change the subject.

“My papa taught me,” she replied. Countless hours they had spent dancing in her bedroom at his house; sometimes it was silly, sometimes serious, and it was one of her fondest memories from growing up.

“Think he’ll teach me?” 

“Oh, definitely!” Hopefully, she’d be able to properly introduce them to each other at some point here—not just the hurried thing that had happened in their quarters…gosh, was that really only two weeks ago? It felt like a lifetime had passed in between. 

Blessedly, the music came to an end and the audience applauded. They both sighed in relief, but then—were they supposed to bow or something? They glanced around for a bit, smiling awkwardly, until Eloise ushered them off the floor. 

“God, that was embarrassing,” Robyn blurted once they were off to the side. Alice was thinking the same, but knew better than to complain like that around her mum.

Eloise, though, didn’t shoot daggers as expected; weirdly, she smirked. “Be glad it wasn’t the Gamemaker. I had to dance with one who was close to retirement and could barely stand upright anymore. He may have worn a diaper.”

Both girls cringed. 

“Anyways, now that that’s over, I want to introduce you to some people. Come on.”

‘Some people’ apparently meant half the past victors present. Not all of them were mentors; some just came for the party, and likely didn’t remember much of the introduction. Nearly all were recognizable, though, given that she’d grown up seeing their faces on the television. Some were especially so, like Regina Mills from Phrygia—famous for literally tearing out the hearts of her opponents (and who now wore a purple beaded cuff, the style of which was becoming more and more familiar)—and Emma Nolan from Misthaven, who had probably given Alice the idea of using the trees to her advantage; that was part of how she’d won. 

But it didn’t escape Alice’s notice how Emma’s eyes kept flicking to her cuff, with some odd mix of pity and concern; she didn’t want either of those, thanks, but it did make her wonder if those two things were fated to follow her forever now.

When they finally made the rounds toward the Victors from Atlantica, Alice felt like she could almost relax; her papa was looking exceedingly dapper in an all-black suit with a flattering cut, shirt open like he liked, in stark contrast to Aunt Ariel’s frilly pink gown. But his rigid posture as they approached sent a clear message: they couldn’t act familiar here; not yet. So she drew herself up a little bit more as Eloise made the proper, if entirely unnecessary, introductions.

They exchanged the same pleasantries everyone else had, albeit slightly strained; it was taking every nerve in Alice’s body not to drag them both into giant hugs and shove Robyn at them. That’d have to wait.

“I wonder,” her papa started after conversation had lulled, “You appear to be a fantastic dancer, Miss Gothel. Might I seek your hand for a turn about the floor?” He extended his hand to complete the offer.

She glanced at her mother for approval; she had no idea how this might look, if it was normal or not. It probably wasn’t, but nothing about her and Robyn was anyway, so when Eloise nodded her assent, she probably grabbed Killian’s hand a bit too roughly. He just chuckled, though, and led her to the floor.

As desperate as she was to get wrapped up in her father’s embrace, he kept a polite distance, even if the steps were ones they’d done a thousand times. “I owe you a better dance when we’re home,” he murmured. “Without so many eyes on us.”

“I’ll hold you to it,” she answered. But now that she’d won—now that the danger of Olympus making her a target was over—she’d been wondering… “What if...what if we did tell people? Like, everyone?”

Her papa gave her a sad smile. “I wish we could, Starfish—so much. But if it came out that there’d been an inter-realm dalliance like this...I don’t know what it would do. And your mother has already dealt with her fair share of trouble.” He didn’t say ‘over you,’ but it wasn’t needed; Alice knew that much of her mum’s family died right around the time she was born and no one suspected it was a coincidence.

“I just hate this,” she complained. “I thought winning made life less complicated.”

He chuckled a bit, in the way that she’d figured out meant he was amused by her innocence; normally, she enjoyed making him laugh, but it rang hollow right now. “Darling, my greatest wish for you was that you never had to face this. But know that I’ll always be there for you—that hasn’t changed.”

She sighed. “I know. I love you, papa.”

He gave a half-smile that somehow always meant more than a full one with him. “I love you too, Starfish.”

The song ended much too soon and it would probably draw the wrong kind of attention if they lingered, so he gentlemanly escorted her back to where her mother and Robyn had continued to talk with Ariel—who surreptitiously gave Alice a thumbs up of approval that made her smirk. 

“Have you guys seen the buffet yet?” she asked, then acted shocked when they hadn’t. Really, she just knew that Alice was always hungry and likely assumed she was starved right now—and she was right. “Seriously, Eloise; feed these girls!” she gushed, winking; Alice was going to have to thank her for the reprieve later. 

They said their goodbyes—lingering a bit in her polite handshake with Papa—and finally got to enjoy the delicacies of Olympus. 

Her papa was right: life was going to be more complicated from here on out. But between him, Robyn, her mother, and the other people around her, Alice knew she’d acclimate eventually. 

Also—she discovered the best marmalade she’d ever had on the buffet. That might make it all worth it. 

◇─◇──◇────◇────◇────◇────◇────◇─────◇──◇─◇

Killian didn’t have the energy to deal with this tonight. The Gala was usually his favorite part of the Games—if he had to have one—but when all he wanted to do was be with his daughter, far from here, having her here but being required to keep his distance was agony. 

Maybe if Milah was still here, it wouldn’t be so bad, but she wasn’t, was she?

At least the bar was, so after the Sherwood group departed, he excused himself from Ariel’s side to get a drink. 

While he was ordering, Jefferson arrived next to him. “That was quite a show at the end, there, Hatter,” Killian said. “Pulled right on my heartstrings.”

“Well, you know, anything for a great story,” the gamemaker replied. “I don’t know if everyone is pleased with the outcome, but it will definitely be remembered.”

“Who doesn’t love a happy ending? I certainly did.”

“Well, of course you would.”

Killian and Jefferson exchanged a long look at his comment. Did he know? Despite the comment, his expression was unreadable; it was probably best if Killian didn’t linger on it, then. 

“Now comes the hard part: topping yourself next year,” he plowed on with a plastered-on smile. “Care to share your secrets?”

“Where’s the fun in that?” Jefferson laughed, albeit nervously. “But let me remind you that it is a Quarter Quell, and it will be the most memorable yet.”

Killian swallowed, thinking of the last Quell and who was in it, before smirking back. “Can’t wait.” Jefferson smiled in reply, but it almost seemed pained; it certainly wasn’t genuine, which was unusual to see in someone from Olympus—the games were typically a source of sadistic joy. “What, not looking forward to it? You’ve got the most coveted job in all the realms.”

“Yeah, I suppose. I just don’t know how much longer I can do it.” Astonishing; Killian never considered a gamemaker might have a conscience. Jefferson continued, “With any luck, I won’t have to.”

“Retiring already?” He was hardly older than Killian—much too young to call it quits, especially considering his, ah, wizened predecessor. 

“Something like that. I won’t go down without a fight, though.”

The gamemaker then excused himself, leaving Killian slightly confused; something was going on. But he didn’t feel like thinking about it tonight, so instead he started on his drink and began searching for some company again.  

He found Ariel in the crowd, talking with Emma and Graham on the other side of the room and felt his expression darken, brows furrowing. Emma’s betrayal still stung, though the intensity had dulled, especially in comparison to other blows he’d been dealt.

She hadn’t been wrong—he probably would have done something similar, had he been allied with any other team. But he felt too much of a connection with her—and, frankly, respected Graham too much—to have done so this year.

He was just angry and shocked at the initial betrayal, but now that Alice was (relatively) safe and sound, he was a bit calmer about the whole thing. It was still a shit scenario, but not as terrible as he’d originally made it out to be.

And Emma’s friendship—or whatever it was they had—was not something he wanted to lose. Perhaps it was best they found a way to bury the hatchet, even if that was a terrible idiom to use.   

He shotgunned the rest of his drink, leaving the glass on a random table and letting the liquid confidence give strength to his cocky front.

“Not trying to steal my partner, I hope?” Killian said as he strolled up, grinning at Graham, before turning his attention to Emma. “Though I’d be open to a trade if you are,” he added, winking.

Emma rolled her eyes and gripped Graham’s arm tighter. If she was trying to avoid him, she’d have to try harder.

“They were just telling me about their son, Henry,” Ariel said with a sweet smile. “He sounds so sweet. Do you have any pictures of him?”

“Yes!” Emma said, reaching for her clutch, and pulling from it a photo of a boy with brown eyes and a mess of dark hair. Killian could see Emma in the boy’s features, but none of Graham. As if he needed any more confirmation there.

“He’s so handsome!” Ariel gushed. “How old is he?”

“Um, eleven,” Emma replied, somewhat nervously, the smile running away from her face. Eleven. The boy could be reaped next year. Killian said a silent prayer, hoping that wasn’t the plan for next year that Jefferson was talking about. But wouldn’t that be a story: the grandson and son of victors finding himself in the games? No wonder Emma had kept her distance from Olympus.

Sensing a need to lighten the mood, Killian addressed Graham. “You didn’t answer my question: would you like to trade partners? It only has to be for the evening.” Emma just averted her eyes.

“Sure, why not?” Graham answered, not giving Emma a chance to say otherwise. “Shall we?” He offered Ariel his arm and they went off to talk to Archie, an older victor from Arendelle.

Killian faced Emma. Despite his usual swagger, he found himself somewhat nervous. Not quite knowing what else to do, and not wanting to get into what was likely to be a heated conversation out in the open, he asked, “Care to dance?”

“Dance? Really?” She finally made eye contact with him, an amused look of disbelief spread across her features. “Didn’t you already do that tonight?”

“There’s no such thing as dancing too much,” he tossed back; he wasn’t sure what to make of the fact that she’d noticed his waltz with Alice. 

Emma snickered. “Okay, but I need another drink first.”

 “I won’t argue that. Lead the way.”

At the bar, they ordered two shots of rum. “To the end of the games,” he offered as a toast.

“If only that were true,” Emma replied with a sad smile as she clinked her glass with his and downed the shot. “I sometimes feel as though I haven’t stopped playing.”

That seemed to be the theme of the night. “They certainly have a way of following us, don’t they?”

He watched Emma’s face change as her thoughts drifted elsewhere, and his own would have done the same had he not been momentarily mesmerized by her beauty. Something about the light in the ballroom, paired with that familiar look in her eyes (not to mention the figure she cut in her red cocktail dress) caught him completely off guard. Goodness, it was like he was a teenage boy again. 

He took a breath (apparently, he’d forgotten to) and reached out with his hand for Emma’s, squeezing gently in case she tried to pull back (she did), and smiled. “Come on, you promised me a dance.”

◇─◇──◇────◇────◇────◇────◇────◇─────◇──◇─◇

Killian gently dragged Emma to the floor, if it was possible to be gently dragged. A few couples were out there—older victors who were mainly in town because it was something to do, bored with the monotony of life in their respective Victor’s Villages. Emma could hardly blame them; the only reason she hadn’t been bored stiff by now was that she was too preoccupied with Henry, as her parents were earlier with her. 

Few victors had children, though. Why would you want to risk your child going through that torture? Henry was turning twelve in a few months; the next several years would be torture at Reaping time, and his genealogy wasn’t as lucky as Olympus would think.

Looking at Killian, she was stunned he’d made it through without losing his sanity completely. At least he had a happy ending, even if few people knew it. 

Part of her wanted to ask him about—well, about all of it: how Alice came into being, how they managed to hide it while clearly having a relationship (if they’d even really had one; it was hard to tell based on their stilted interactions now), how he hadn’t lost his mind during every prior reaping—but now wasn’t the time. 

It was probably a good time to apologize, though. Even if, knowing him, it would be a prime opportunity to knock down all her defenses, as he tended to do. However, the rum had calmed her flight instinct, so for now, she was just going to dance.

Out on the floor, Killian placed his left arm around Emma’s waist—she could feel the cool of his hook at the small of her back—and lifted her right hand in his. He began to move in time to the music being played by a small ensemble at one end of the floor. “So you actually know how to do...whatever this is?” Emma asked incredulously. 

“It’s called a waltz,” he replied confidently. “There’s only one rule,” he said, leaning in with an almost whisper, “pick a partner who knows what he’s doing.” 

Emma rolled her eyes, but those stupid butterflies deep down took flight again. Really? She hadn’t felt like that since she was a kid.  

“Follow along, love, and you’ll be fine.”

It took some time, and she did stumble once (Killian caught her in his sure arms, responding cheekily “It’s about bloody time,” which made her groan) but she soon found herself keeping pace with Killian.

Falling into a steady pattern, Killian began making small talk. “You know, most men take your silence as off-putting,” he said, then leaned in. “But I love a challenge.” She had to laugh, both at how sure of himself he was, and at what he was trying to do.

“I think you know by now that doesn’t work on me.”

“Couldn’t hurt to try.”

Either he’d had enough rum that he didn’t care, or he’d already moved past the events of the past week. So it was probably time for her to do the same. “Killian, I’m sorry for how things ended. It wasn’t—”

“It’s done,” he cut her off. “No sense dwelling on it.”

“I know, but I still wanted to apologize, and thank you for all your help.” She hoped her smile sold it (to both him and her).

“It was my pleasure, lass. This was definitely one of the more memorable games in my career, thanks in part to you.”

She arched an eyebrow in disbelief. “I think I had less to do with it than you’re giving me credit for.”

He swallowed. “Aye, that’s fair,” he confirmed, and she didn’t miss his glance across the ballroom toward Alice. “But you definitely added some excitement, in multiple ways.”

Were it not for the rum in her veins, she probably would have had some sort of nervous reaction that would have burst a few lightbulbs; she still couldn’t believe she’d lost it around him—twice—and here of all places. Out of habit, she took a few deep breaths, but there was incredibly nothing to calm. To her surprise, though, Killian ran the brace of his hook up and down her back a couple times in a comforting gesture.

“Don’t worry, love—if I can trust you, you can trust me.” The gentle look in his eyes told her that was true; hell, she already knew it, but in general, it was so much easier to not believe it. (Because then it didn’t hurt as much when it proved to be a lie.)

Killian, though...she wondered if she might be okay. 

“Do you trust me?” he asked. 

“Yeah.”

“Good.” And then he spun her out, startling her into giggles, before pulling her back in. He laughed as she gripped his biceps to regain her balance. “I can see I’m finally winning you over, Nolan,” he said with a smirk.

“You wish,” she teased back, but gods—he wasn’t far. She really hoped that no one noticed how close they were, with her supposed husband still in the room. The Olympus gossip rags could be vicious, even if they were barely seen outside the realm.

He seemed to realize the same thing and sobered a bit, but she could still see the playful twinkle in those baby blues. “It’s a shame you’re taken,” he mused, albeit sarcastically. “We’d make such a gorgeous couple.”

“Do I need to remind you that the tricks you used on the rich old ladies don’t work on me? I know your game now.”

“Perhaps that’s true, but I do have a reputation to uphold.” His cocky demeanor slipped a bit there—as if he didn’t even believe himself, or didn’t care to.

“Was that what Eloise was?” she asked quietly.

“No,” he answered, almost whispering. “That was...a lone encounter.”

“It only takes once,” she replied, knowingly. “So you didn’t love her?”

“Not her.”

They were still dancing, though the complicated steps had eased to a shuffle. She glanced up and looked long and hard at his face, and the furrowed expression it was wearing—a familiar look of pain on his face she’d seen in the mirror far too many times. “What was her name?”

He hesitated a moment, glancing down, before softly replying, “Milah.” Emma vaguely remembered her; a beautiful victor from Atlantica, who had died suddenly a while ago—not long after Killian’s win, if memory served right. “I’m sorry,” she said.

“And you?” he asked. 

Should have known Killian would be reading her, too. “Neal,” Emma said, the name foreign on her lips. As much as he occupied her thoughts, she hadn’t said his name aloud in years. “He died in the games.”

“Is he Henry’s father?”

Emma considered a non-answer, but frankly, they were past that at this point. “Yeah,” she murmured. 

“I’m sorry,” he said quietly.

Mercifully, the music ended after a few moments, and Emma broke apart from Killian, as if the weight of their conversation was driving a wedge between them. “I-I should go back to Graham.” She stared at his chest, still afraid to look up; at least she could blame it on his always-exposed chest hair.

“Allow me to escort you,” Killian said, offering his left arm and a smile that did little to hide how he was equally affected. Emma took a deep breath, took his arm, and smiled, putting back up the emotional walls she could so easily hide behind. Even though Graham was her best friend, she’d barely let him get through them; so how had Killian broken through so quickly, and so repeatedly?

Ariel and Graham were still chatting with Archie when Emma and Killian found them. “Greetings, Arch!” Killian nearly shouted as they approached, reaching out to shake Archie’s hand. 

The man from Arendelle gingerly took it and lightly shook. “Hello, Killian, Emma,” nodding at each in turn. It was hard to imagine this timid man ever winning the games, but he had somehow pulled it off—being from Arendelle, he would have been exposed to any number of technologies that proved useful in Neverland. He did his best to pass on his knowledge to the tributes he mentored, but had only had limited success; mainly with Belle French, who won a handful of years ago and was likely even more technologically savvy than Archie. She had somehow managed to electrocute a number of tributes during her games, due to some handy wire and a well-timed thunderstorm.

They'd never actually talked—there hadn’t been occasion to—but Emma had always admired Belle from afar. In addition to being highly intelligent, she also seemed incredibly sweet. “Where is Belle? I had hoped to see her tonight,” Emma asked.

“Oh, she c-couldn’t make it,” Archie answered, nervous even for him. “President Gold invited her to join him tonight, to watch the Victors’ interview.” 

Emma was still on Killian’s arm, and felt his whole body go rigid at the mention of the president. His face must have darkened, too, because Ariel asked, “Killian? Are you alright?” He seemed lost in thought for a moment, but quickly snapped out of it. 

“Of course, love; I’m fine. Just worn down from the week. But I promised this fine lady that I would escort her back to her beau.”

Emma knew she should unwrap herself from Killian’s arm, but given what had just passed between them, she was more than a little concerned. He was nearly as agitated as he’d been during the Games.

“Actually,” she said, faking a yawn, “I think I might turn in, but you can stay down here if you want,” she told Graham. He was clearly enjoying the company—and she couldn’t shake the desire to soothe Killian, or at least get him out of the public eye.

“You sure?” Graham asked—but she could read his second meaning: was she sure about trying to help Killian?

“Yeah,” she said confidently, then turned to the man on her arm. “Weren’t you heading back, too?”

He blinked at her dramatically, but then figured out what she was suggesting. “Aye; I still need to pack, I’m afraid. I promise to see your lady back safely,” he assured Graham.

“You better,” Graham threw back, smiling encouragingly. She knew what that look meant—it was the kind he always gave her when he wanted her to try something new. But she was going to ignore that.

They bid Archie farewell, who promptly and absentmindedly wandered off. Ariel pulled Emma into an embrace that Emma didn’t hesitate to return—regardless of whatever was going on between her and Killian, Emma had definitely found a new friend in Ariel. “Take care, Emma! I’ll miss you!” the other woman squealed.

“I’ll miss you, too!” She wasn’t used to such outpouring of emotion, but there didn’t seem to be any other option when it came to Ariel; it was a stark contrast to the polite but friendly handshake exchanged between Killian and Graham.

She told Graham she’d see him later, trying to be a bit less casual than she usually was, and led the way as she and Killian left the room. He relaxed immediately in the hallway, but she’d learned her lesson when it came to discussing major revelations there, and continued to guide him to the elevator.

It was already there, so they didn’t have to wait to step on board. As soon as the door closed, she turned to face him, noting the brooding grimace on his face. “What happened?”

He clenched his jaw. “Now, or then?”

“Either.”

“Milah...also spent a lot of time with Gold,” he slowly explained. “She was his favorite.”

“Oh,” she breathed. The president was not known for playing well with others...or for sharing his toys. “Is that how she…?”

“Yeah.”

It was Emma's turn to say “I’m sorry.”

Killian nodded, all the while staring at the floor. “I’d hate to see another woman face that fate.”

“I get it.”

The elevator dinged, indicating they’d arrived on her floor. Wordlessly, they exited, and found their way to the Misthaven quarter’s entrance.

“Thank you for getting me out of there,” Killian said. 

“You can only put on a brave face for so long,” Emma shrugged. She’d definitely been in that position. “And you’ve had to do that enough lately.”

He scoffed. “Yeah.”

A slightly awkward silence settled over them then. “Well, I should—” she started, gesturing at the door.

“Yes, yeah, you should—early train,” Killian stammered back, finally looking her in the eyes. He offered his right hand to her, continuing, “I...I enjoyed working with you this week. Until next year?”

She glanced at his hand, but it seemed so informal. And there was just enough rum still left in her veins, and just enough of her emotional energy had been spent tonight that she didn’t have any more left to spend thinking about things like propriety or denial.

She stepped forward, into his space, and grabbed the lapels on his jacket. Then she pressed herself forward and found his lips with hers.

He stilled for a moment, but then his hand found its way to her waist and he leaned into it, firm and insistent but gentle and soft. He tilted his head to deepen it, and for a few brief, shared moments, they were the only people in Pomem. Maybe it was just because it had been so long, but she couldn’t remember being kissed like this—reverently and carefully.

The kiss broke apart naturally, but they stayed close, foreheads touching. “That was…” he breathed, his voice wrecked.

“A one-time thing,” she answered, regrettably knowing that it would have to be. 

He nodded against her, then stepped back and took a deep breath, seeming to regain his composure. “Until next year, then. Safe travels, Emma.”

“You too, Killian,” she said with a soft smile that he thankfully returned.

As much as she wanted to watch him walk away, she instead slipped inside their quarters, swiftly shutting the door behind her. But she leaned back against it, breathing heavily.

Had she really just done that? Had she just actually kissed Killian Jones? A man she’d see, at best, once a year?

Yeah, he understood her more than anyone she’d ever known, and yeah, he was charming and smart and strong. And he’d somehow gotten under her skin and slipped behind all her walls.

Well, like she said—one-time thing. She was just getting him out of her system. She’d have the year ahead to cool off, and then they could continue on as friends. Right?

Right.

She sighed, scrubbed a hand down her face, and glanced around at the too-empty suite.

God, she hated the games.

It was definitely time to go home.

◇─◇──◇────◇────◇────◇────◇────◇─────◇──◇─◇

Seventeen years ago

The pain medications in Olympus were something else. Killian felt mostly clear-headed and in control, with just the slightest unnatural euphoria. But he’d made it through the post-Games interview just fine, he thought, so perhaps they weren’t overly strong.

Until he found himself vomiting in a broom closet outside the Victory celebration. His mental state was back on the ground—but the pain at the end of his arm had returned full-force, fire burning in a hand that wasn’t there. (And, irrationally, he was worried about staining the expensive suit he wore.)

“The drugs wore off?” a female voice asked from outside the threshold.

“Aye,” he panted. “Can you get my mentor?”

He heard the woman’s footsteps as she walked away, then a pair returned. “Milah; thank y—ouu,” he started to say as he emerged from the closet, but it wasn’t Milah walking towards him. It was Eloise Gothel, who’d won the Games a couple years ago. Like most Victors-turned-mentors, she was dressed in the style of Olympus, her red hair in a complicated updo and a flowing green gown that somehow managed to hug all her curves. He averted his gaze, though, when he realized his eyes were wandering.

“Here,” she said, holding out her hand to reveal two small, white pills. “They’re not as strong, but better than nothing.”

“Thanks,” he answered, and she tipped them into his palm. He quickly popped them, and washed them down with the glass of water she’d also brought. The effect was nearly immediate as the throbbing dulled and he could breathe again. And then took a few more sips to wash the taste of vomit from his mouth. Just one room over were all kinds of delicacies, and here he was, unable to stomach any of it. How cruel.

“I suppose I should head back in,” he said, suddenly feeling awkward in the presence of a Victor (well, another one—he still had to remind himself that he was one now, too). Especially one like Eloise, who had won in such a cutthroat manner—literally by cutting throats, after immobilizing people with her magic and making use of the poisonous plants in the arena. The thick bracelet on her wrist was likely the only thing holding her powers back now. (It was all a stark contrast to the beautiful visage in front of him; he was having a hard time tamping down his attraction.) “Were you sent out here to find me?”

“I was,” she stated matter-of-factly; the expression on her face was hard to read—possibly intrigued, or possibly annoyed. (Or both.) “But not to return you to the party. Would you like to come with me?”

“Where?”

“Someplace special.” There was genuine amusement in her blue eyes, but he wasn’t sure how sincere her half smile was. Still, he had no reason to turn her down.

“Sure,” he shrugged.

“Follow me.”

She led him down the hallway and around a couple corners to what looked like an office of some sort; he wondered if it belonged to the Gamemaker. Eloise pressed her finger against the keypad and the door slid open. He didn’t know why he hesitated to follow her in, though, until she turned around and beckoned.

Inside was nothing like he’d expected. Much of the Tribute Castle was clean and cold, sharp lines and sterile surfaces. But this room was the exact opposite: dark, warm colors covered everything, and all the furniture was the plushest he’d ever seen. An especially comfortable-looking bed was off to one side and the soft lighting made the space feel even more welcoming. 

“What is this?” he asked on a breath.

“Somewhere to relax,” she replied, falling against a cushion so stuffed he couldn’t tell if it was actually a sofa or merely a giant pillow. “Join me, won’t you?”

It certainly looked enticing—as did the company—so he complied, letting himself collapse next to her. The cushion somehow managed to both support and embrace his body, although he winced a bit at the way his blunted wrist hit it; he was still getting used to that. 

“Are you alright?” she asked, concerned.

“Aye, I’m fine,” he lied, wanting to impress the slightly older woman. The strap on her dress had slipped a bit, revealing the curve of her bosom. He may have just survived a battle to the death, but he was still technically a young, hormonal man.

“Perhaps you’d like a distraction?” she breathed, shifting closer.

“Yeah, maybe.”

“Good.” And then she surged forward, claiming his lips with hers.

A blushing virgin, Killian was not, but that was certainly one of the more enjoyable nights in his memory. He learned a thing or two about how to pleasure both a woman and himself. 

They were laying in the afterglow, sharing slightly awkward smiles and giggles. For the first time since his name had been plucked, he’d finally been able to forget where he was and what was going on around him; if he was reading the slightly starry expression on Eloise’s face correctly, she felt the same. 

It was at that perfect moment of bliss, of course, that he was jarred by the sound of a cough coming from the shadows.

He jolted away from Eloise in shock; she seemed equally surprised, but less confused.

“Oh, don’t stop on my part,” the person called out, and it was easy to tell who the voice belonged to.

“Welcome, Mister Jones,” President Gold said, rising to his feet. “And let me extend my congratulations again.”

“Th-thank you, sir,” Killian answered, but he was utterly confused (both mentally and physically).

“I see you’re getting along well with Miss Gothel.”

“Yeah…” he said, but when he looked to Eloise for guidance, he could no longer read her expression.

“You know, you’re quite the handsome young man,” Gold continued, hobbling forward with his cane. “I’m sure you’ve attracted many admirers over the last few weeks.”

What on earth was the President getting at? And why the bloody hell was he here? Had he...had he watched?

“An attractive young man like you...people would pay a high price to fall into your good graces.”

“I’m sorry, sir, but I don’t follow,” Killian finally had to say, trying to sit up while also keep his modesty somewhat intact, tugging the covers over his lap. 

“Eloise, you didn’t tell him?”

“Not yet, sir; I figured it would be best coming from you.” There was just enough defiance in her tone that Killian could tell whatever was going on wasn’t entirely by choice.

“I suppose you’re right,” the President sighed. “Well, Mister Jones, you see, I have many friends who I like to repay for their loyalty and support. And I have access to the rarest, most desired commodity around.”

“What, Victors?”

“Exactly. Particularly the ones, such as yourself and Miss Gothel, who are exceedingly appealing to the eye. And, well, I like to give the very best.”

Killian blinked, stunned. The President couldn’t be insinuating what he thought he was—could he? 

“A night with a Victor covers a lot of ground, both politically and financially. You’re a smart lad; that shouldn’t come as a surprise, should it?”

It didn’t, but that didn’t mean he was any less repulsed. “So you whore out Victors to your benefactors?”

“See, I knew you’d figure it out.”

Eloise, for her part, was looking both sheepish and a bit frightened during their exchange. God, what had she been put through?

“I won’t do it,” Killian said defiantly.

Gold just cackled in reply—a terrifying sound that sent shivers up his spine.

“You have to,” Eloise murmured. “If you don’t, he’ll—he’ll hurt the people you love.” If Killian’s memory served correct, Eloise had a mother and sisters back home; was that how Gold got power over her?

“Then I’m afraid the President’s information is incorrect; I don’t have anyone,” Killian spat out.

“Oh, I have plenty of other ways of making you hurt. It would be a shame if Atlantica’s grain supplies stopped coming in, wouldn’t it? Or if an infestation of dreamshade found its way to, say, Mr. Nemo’s yard?”

That stopped Killian cold; any lingering heat from the previous activities dissipated in an instant. “No,” he breathed. “You wouldn’t.”

“I think you’ll find, Mister Jones, that there’s very little I’m not willing to do.” Gold followed with a sneering, reptilian grin. 

This couldn’t be happening. Victory was supposed to be freedom—freedom from the looming threat of the games and all the shadows they’d cast on his life. Not this...slavery. 

But he’d been in enough fights in his life, even before the Arena, to know when he was outmatched. Gold’s sneer and Eloise’s resigned expression told him enough. 

“Fine, I’ll do it.”

Gold snorted. “Glad you came around; not like you had much choice. Although,” he started, tapped his fingers on his cane in thought. “That does remind me. I’ve considered expanding this venture to the sponsorship side of things, if you were interested.”

No, he wasn’t, but Killian couldn’t help but be curious. “What would that mean?”

“Sponsorship during the games also brings in quite a bit of revenue. But I’ve always wondered just how much more it could take if there were certain other...perks attached. Would you like to help me test my theory?”

Killian swallowed. “Would I be able to choose the sponsors?”

“To some extent, yes. The ones who can afford it.”

It was the best opportunity Killian was going to have in this. He would be little more than a prostitute, but if he could have any level of choice, he’d be an idiot not to take it. “Alright,” he said, an unconfident agreement. 

“It seems we have a deal, then,” Gold replied, almost squealing, then offered Killian his hand, which was gingerly taken. “I’ll give you the full details at the next games. Eloise,” he continued, sharply, “you have another appointment in a half hour. Don’t be late.”

Without another word, he turned on his heel and disappeared into the shadows once more, letting the most awkward of silences fall onto the two left. 

Killian didn’t know how long they sat there, not moving. At some point, he shivered; whether it was from the sweat cooling on his body or in reaction to the exchange with Gold was up for debate. But that seemed to jolt Eloise, who finally started to move again; Killian slowly joined her. 

They faced away from each other as they moved about the room, gathering and putting on their clothes from the random places they’d landed. It was almost easy to act like the other person wasn’t there—until it came time for a Killian to button his shirt. 

“Fuck,” he muttered, attempting to do it with his remaining hand—and not having much luck. 

“I’ve got it,” Eloise said quietly, and finished pulling up the side zipper on her dress before coming over. 

He watched her fingers carefully do up the closures, afraid to make eye contact. He didn’t know what he’d find in her gaze—apology? Remorse? Or worse: nothing? Did it matter? She was a victim in all this, too. 

But she spoke up before he could ask. “I’m sorry for luring you here under false pretenses.” That was putting it lightly; he knew she was only doing what she’d been commanded, though. Still, he didn’t respond. “But I just want you to know that you’re the first person I’ve actually wanted to sleep with.” 

With that, she did up the last button on his shirt, placed a quick kiss on his cheek, and turned to leave. 

He waited for the click of the door closing before he moved again, hoping the brief moment of time would be enough to get his racing thoughts in order. That had been the most confusing, exhilarating, horrifying encounter of his...well, he couldn’t say life, or even week, but definitely that day—and hopefully the last such moment in his life. 

He felt used, but by Gold, not Eloise. And he would probably have to get accustomed to that feeling. 

He took one more deep breath before putting on his jacket, only wincing slightly when it brushed his bare stump, and left the room; something told him it would be occupied again soon. Hopefully, he looked presentable; all he wanted to do was go back to the plush bed in Atlantica’s quarters, but he knew he’d be expected back in the gala. They’d probably wondered where he’d gone. 

The sad, knowing smile on Milah’s face when he snuck back into the room told him, though: she knew exactly where he’d been, and why. 

◇─◇──◇────◇────◇────◇────◇────◇─────◇──◇─◇

thanks, as always!!! tagging:  @kat2609 @thesschesthair @xpumpkindumplingx @shipsxahoy @amortentia-on-the-rocks @mryddinwilt @cocohook38 @annytecture @wingedlioness @word-bug @distant-rose​ @wellhellotragic​ @welllpthisishappening​ @let-it-raines​ @pirateherokillian @its-imperator-furiosa​ @killianmesmalls​ @sherlockianwhovian​ @ineffablecolors​ @laschatzi​ @ive-always-been-a-pirate​ @nfbagelperson​ @stubblesandwich​ @killian-whump​ @phiralovesloki​ @athenascarlet​ @ilovemesomekillianjones​ @whimsicallyenchantedrose​ @snowbellewells​ @idristardis​ @scientificapricot​ @searchingwardrobes​

[theworldbrewery]

A playlist for my current party: 4 idiots + their honorary cult grandma, four with new names and one with someone else’s--god I love them. they requested a playlist breakdown so i’ve placed it under a cut for brevity. I’m always soft for making fan content for the campaigns I’m in tbh.

Alice: an elf-turned half-orc after a reincarnate spell went awry, her wild magic caused her marriage to fall apart when she accidentally burned down her home. She’s looking for control over the magic that is ruining her life.

Remmy: a man of many names, Remmy is an aasimar cleric with more secrets than even the other party members are aware of. He’s untrusting and full of fear, but the party gets him to open up--against his better judgment.

Gadao: an earth genasi from an isolated monastery, he’s looking for an identity of his own after realizing he may not be an incarnation of an ancestral spirit after all. Looking for his place in the world, the party’s fast-paced life contrasts with his steady nature.

Leap: an elderly tiefling ranger, she grew up in a cult of pain and left it only by good fortune. Her taste for adventure--and a need for closure--keep her on the road, though she looks forward to seeing her family again.

Blue: an aarakocra bard, Blue awoke with no memory and promptly joined a shady merchant vessel as a good-luck musician. They’re always down to fight, curious, and ready to hoard as many items as they can get their hands on.

Anger | Sleeping at Last

I love the way this song opens, the energy it has. Favorite lyrics are “it all spills out/reckless but honest words leave my mouth,” which maybe speaks to my love of intra-party conflict… but I also have a soft spot for “and suddenly I’m someone that prays/last-minute man of faith” given the campaign’s attention to the divine. I’ve really loved leaning into that. It feels like this song has threads that connect to every character.

Hellfire | Barns Courtney

God, I love the chorus to this song. I feel that in this party, Leap and Remmy have the strongest links in these lyrics, between Leap’s simmering fury at her cult and Remmy’s...everything. There’s a period of the song that isn’t quite an instrumental, but has sort of mangled lyrics/rap, and though I can’t quite make it out, one bit sounds like “roll the dice” -- a fun nod to D&D as a whole and the risk-takers among the party.

Blood I Bled | The Staves

My favorite lyric here is “raise your banners and ride to war/throwing ‘round your name.” This song feels like a challenge to the world, suitable for a group of adventurers just forming a party. The singers and songwriters mention the song as one of “no, I won’t take this bullshit,” and that strong message really speaks to the PCs.

Hustler | Zayde Wølf

Hustler is all about coming out on top, and y’all are “turning up the heat” all the time. “Looking at the city like I already own it” feels like a foreshadowing moment to me; one day, when you all are level 10, 15, 20, you might reach an unmatchable power, if you live long enough to see it. 

Homemade Dynamite | Lorde

I chose this song for the absolute clusterfuck D&D parties can be. “Don’t know you super well/but I think that you might be the same as me/Behave abnormally” encapsulates something really funny about party members getting to know each other and start to trust each other, even when the rule might still be “I’ll give you my best side, tell you all my best lies,” and your secrets and private problems haven’t yet come to light.

Nervous | X Ambassadors

The chorus of foreboding in “cause what comes up must come down”  is, how do I put this? Iconique. I think this song especially fits Leap and Alice, both of whom are aware of how quickly things can go awry but put a cheerful face on their own worries. Even when nothing’s wrong (“and I can’t complain, it’s amazing”) they know things could go south quickly.

An Act of Kindness | Bastille

This song best fits Leap and Gadao’s relationship, especially when they met. “Oh I got a feeling this will shake me down/Oh I’m kind of hoping this will turn me round” seems to speak directly to Gadao pulling Leap away from the cult and giving her the opportunity to be better than she was. On another level, the party’s bonds are born from acts of kindness and friendship--Remmy buying lorebooks for Alice, Leap making tea, Gadao stepping in to defend the party from the mimic.

Everybody Wants to Rule the World | Lorde

Despite the name, this has something for everyone, I think. “Turn your back on Mother Nature” suits Alice’s vendetta against the Forest Father, “Help me make the most of freedom/and of pleasure” fits Blue’s brand of hedonism, “It’s my own remorse” echoes Leap’s regrets. Gadao alone doesn’t quite fit in here...unless… >:)

Kicks | Barns Courtney

This is a Blue song! “I’ll show you how to live for free” the artist sings, and Blue’s freewheeling lifestyle seeking “kicks” matches this energy really well. If Blue is “a wild one” “singing in the midnight street,” they’re getting their kicks with this party for sure. Blue lives without being tied down, theoretically limitless. 

Hail to the Victor | Thirty Seconds to Mars

This song is about Leap, no question. “Another life, another love/another kill, another drug” fits into Leap’s two lives, one in the cult and one out of it. And in this new mission against Babylon Lionel, she’s seeking a revenge of her own, though it’s one against her childhood more than her actual enemy.

I’m a Wanted Man | Royal Deluxe

Remmy “would kill again to keep from doing time,” without a doubt, so this one’s for him. Constantly warning he’s trouble for his friends, saying that “you should never ever trust my kind” isn’t too far off. Like Remmy, this song is edgy, but with a hesitant moment of emo-ness that makes the performance of darkness something a little more genuine.

Big God | Florence and the Machine

Alice is not a faithful woman, but she’s unfortunately entangled in some religious nonsense she hates. At the same time, I feel lyrics like “you’ll always be my favorite ghost” refer best to Alice’s fraught relationship with her wife. My favorite line here is “Sometimes I think it’s getting better/and then it gets much worse,” which is essentially Alice’s experience of her wild magic. Deep down, she might even be drawn to the magic’s chaos, but she can’t help but resent what it’s taking away from her.

Wisdom, Justice, and Love | Linkin Park

This one’s for Gadao. It starts off so peaceful and hopeful, the instrumentals overlaid with a speech by Martin Luther King, Jr. But as he starts to list the evils of the world, King’s voice, so steady and confident, is warped. Gadao’s own faith experience becomes warped by the power games of the people around him, and even as he’s seeking “wisdom, justice, and love,” he can’t escape the effects of materialism and violence around him.

Icarus | Bastille

Some folks live steady lives, but not these people. Adventurer’s lives tend to burn bright, hot, and short. From Leap’s perspective, most of the party is made of kids who don’t know the world yet. Are they “digging their own grave,” “too close to the sun?” Despite their ride-or-die commitments, Leap can see all of you risking yourselves--and for what? Who do you want to be, at the end of it all? A wife and mason? A sage and monk? Or do you want greater things than that?

Losing My Religion | Dia Frampton

I can hear so much of Remmy’s opinions in this song, saying “I’m choosing my confessions, trying to keep an eye on you” but realizing, over and over again: “Oh no, I’ve said too much.” As he tries to keep up his own facades, Gadao and Leap’s own faith collides with the beliefs of a cult leader and Alice struggles with a religion she doesn’t care for at all.

Start a War | Klergy and Valerie Broussard

Like Hail to the Victor, this song is all about Leap’s conflict with the cult of Loviatar and the Mother of Martyrs. Even though the Loviatar cult might be gone, the spirit lives on. My favorite line for Leap here is “bang, shots fired/pain is what you desire,” for the decision to challenge Babs to a one-on-one fight. But is it Babs who is starting this war, or Leap?

Friction | Imagine Dragons

This one kind of gives me Gadao vibes with the lyrics “when you’ve made it/won’t you tell me what to do?” After all that pressure to fulfill the expectations of other people, he has to get out of the middle and move on, maybe even become someone new. Key line is “why can’t you let go/like a bird in the snow/this is no place to build your home,” reminding Gadao that he doesn’t have a place in this world. Not yet.

Transcendental Youth | the mountain goats

“Sing, sing for ourselves alone,” sings John Darnielle, and maybe that’s what makes this feel so much like Blue. Maybe it’s the lyric, “cedar smudge our headbands/and take to the skies/soar ever upwards,” calling to Blue’s dislocation from time and place, flying away from their problems. Blue doesn’t remember their childhood, and has no idea how old they are. Even if they did know, their lifespan is short. They live every day like the halcyon days of youth, footloose and fancy-free indeed.

Champion | Barns Courtney

I swear this is the last Barns Courtney song. But this song is the resilience of coming through fights and perils and dangers. My favorite lyric is “Oh, Lord, save my soul/take my pain and turn it into gold” which, incidentally, is exactly what happens when you level up. The party’s struggles translate to strength, to influence, to skill, and even riches.

In the Woods Somewhere | Hozier

On the one hand, this could be about any combat in the dark woods at night (*cough*, Remmy killing that dragonborn, *cough*). But more importantly, this song is about Alice. She struggles with a power she doesn’t understand, with something’s eyes on her that she can’t fight. The best she can do is run from the danger and try to survive it. Whatever eyes are watching her now, Alice better take care. Favorite line? “I clutched my life/and wished it kept/my dearest love/I’m not done yet.”

Natural | Imagine Dragons

Natural tells the party one way of surviving. The line “you gotta be so cold/to make it in this world” suits Remmy’s outlook so well, the one he pushes at the rest of the party. The line “rather be the hunter than the prey” speaks well to Blue’s tactics--preferring to act from above. Alice and Leap know better than anyone that “nothing ever comes without a consequence or cost,” and Gadao may be the only one ‘holding the line’ against a harder heart. Another song with bits and pieces associated with everyone.

Dead Hearts | Stars

There isn’t a specific lyric here that jumps out at me, no line that tells me who this song is for. This is the song for the ones who die--those who have, and who will. We might not be there yet, but this is a song for acknowledging the sacrifice of your friends and allies. The knowledge that you knew them once, and in some ways, their ghost stays with you. Or maybe they’re revived, or reincarnated, but there’s always something a little different.

The Projectionist | Sleeping at Last

Eventually the session ends, and the story closes, and the lights come up. “We’re leaving our shadows behind us now/we’re leaving, we’re leaving it all behind for now,” Ryan O’Neill sings. We’re putting on costumes, telling a story for each other, and maybe the game ends every time, but maybe it makes us brave. I’d like to think so. 

The lyrics to all these songs can be found at Genius.com. Thanks xx

[alvadee]

what was his favorite types of music (if you know, and if you don't what would you guess it would be?) What were Vic's favorite things to read ? Can you describe his fashion sense and give us examples of his best Looks?

(thank youuuuuu 💕)

i sadly don’t know what his music taste was!!! i even asked his nephew when I interviewed him and he had no idea! i only know that he liked italian opera. and i won’t make a guess because it could be anything! he was an unusual fellow.

And to his taste in literature: Shakespeare of course (”The more you study him, the greater he grows.”) and otherwise we get a look at some of the writers he likes through his selection of pieces he performed (usually from memory) in his one-man shows which were (besides from the bible and himself) by Dylan Thomas, William Butler Yeats, Robert Browning, Phyllis McGinley, Dorothy Parker, Emily Dickinson, Frances Langford, Hillaire Belloc, Robert Benchley, A.E. Houseman and Alice Meynell.

“He selects his readings, he says, admitting he is a prolific reader, by choosing pieces that appeal to him personally and “tries to find the thread” to reach his audience. “Real poetry,” he said, “should leave a little hole in you, a little cut.” “I love to take these varied poets out of the book shelves,” he said, “and share them with people today. I think that would give great joy to the poets to know their work is still touching people down through the decades.”

His fashion sense? According to Victor himself “old man” 😂

“I have a surveyor who sizes me twice a year for suits. He is also a dramatist and we fight tooth and nail about what I should wear. He screams that I dress like an old man. So I do, but can you see me in what today’s 25.year-olds wear? I don’t give a hang about style and I certainly don’t want my sleeves to end at my elbows and my pants to stop at my ankles.”

I have often bemoaned that I have only few photos of Victor in private, most of him are “at work” where you’d either see him in costume or suits but from what I’ve seen Victor’s personal wardrobe didn’t have anything that’s iconically 60s and 70s. He wore a lot of button up and polo shirts, often paired with a suit coat, sometimes with a sweater vest and tie and always long cloth pants. Everything in typical men colors, really not flashy. Besides black, white and gray, he wore blues, greens, yellows, browns and reds. I think the way he dressed he could run around today an no one would bat an eye. Pretty much casual chic? Or sport casual when he wears his adidas sneakers lol

Best looks? Oh jeez, again i have so little photos of him in his own clothes and most a pretty cropped. But you mostly saw him in in suits and he looked so good in them, especially tail coats and his period costumes. 

also 

lol

[inappropriatefangirlneeds]

Gotham s4ep4 “The Demon's Head” Personal Review 

“I hope that satisfies your curiosity” Warning spoilers below  

Not quite back to the old format but I´m not sure if that´s a good or bad thing anyway.

The “What is so important about this knife?!” club, founded by Barbara Kean gets two honourably members, Bruce Wayne and Jim Gordon. Ra´s al Ghul still refuses to reveal more than vague ideas and stories.

 * I like Alex Winthrop, I want(ed) to be Alex, I´m jealous, beyond jealous and full of regret * they really got the switch in tone from boy just talking to boy remembering other “boy” in the room is Bruce Wayne really nice * NILES WINTHROP: “My boy people believe in these stories, they kill for them” Stories and ideas still the most dangerous thing in history since the dawn of mankind!  * That what is it a saber tooth tiger? skeleton gives me Hannibal Randall Tier flashbacks  * “The best liar I ever met ran a brothel in Shanghai. Her quite considerable gift was that you knew she was lying but didn´t care, you so badly wanted to believe her” No my dear Ra's al Ghul the best liar you ever met was a plain and simple tailor.  

 * “Knocking Victor, we discussed this.” WHEN, WHY, did you discuss this, WHAT happened that you had to discuss this ?! I need to know. Oswald .. spill the beans.

* SOFIA FALCONE claims to be only here to support the charities. Concerns from OSWALD COBBLEPOT are unfounded, she says. VICTOR ZSASZ is leaning the background and distracting me tremendously, the blue suits him. Victor´s “I´mma stab you” sound so lovely, the threat goes totally over my head.  Glad Oswald´s paranoia is confirming my headcanon about the families lying doormat. Sofia is so good, I´m starting to love her. She´s aiming for harmless. It reminds me so much of early Oswald.   

* Some families loyal to Falcone show up at SOFIA FALCONE´s place wanting back old times and their beloved Carmine. She claims to want them gone for their own good, too late. Oswald makes her listen to them being shot. She served them to penguin on an ice cold plate. That was so calculated wasn´t it. “You used me” Sofia lets OSWALD COBBLEPOT believe that he is calling the shots. He seems to buy it. “You´re alive aren’t you” “I would plant roses; they will cover up the smell”  Sofia criticizes Oswald´s methods: “My father wouldn´t have ..”   “My father knew how to build on the strength of others ..”  Send a message that the old order supports him then the now dead men would have pledged him loyalty.  She is weaseling herself into his empire presenting herself as useful. This is “golden goose” part two! Oswald acts like he doesn´t care  “New Times, new methods” but I´m sure this will be going through his mind. He took so much from his old mentors, he knows that himself, he´s even mentioned it this episode.

 * Later: SOFIA FALCONE talking to JIM GORDON pushes emotion buttons again: Recalling her father Carmine Falcone stabbing a man begging for his life just to see everything back to normal as if nothing had happened the next day. One would think she should turn her back on Gotham but nope. “This house, this city is in my veins, I´m home Jim.” Is she mirroring the blood rhetoric from Jim in 4x03? “It´s in my blood” were Jim´s words  “The city is my birth right” was her phrasing, both refer to a birth right in some way but there was more legal/law rhetoric in it.   Jim asks about the missing/dead men. Since when is Jim eager to investigate the murder of criminals. Sofia tells him about Penguin using her as bait and Jim is “And you let him” yeaah right? He´s not taking her seriously previously but now she should have things neat and tidy.  Sofia calls him out that Jim´s coming for help from Carmine would never have been bloodless. Was that her plan, Jim asks, get close to penguin gain his confidence. He needs to know what she is going to do. No he doesn’t! (Makes me think of Jim just being more open to Barbara Kean in S1 would have prevented some stuff and things as well.) Sofia is gonna get the city back from penguin, that´s what Jim wants she´s gonna give him that but he has to trust her! Jim grabs her arm, smashes the glass and kisses her. It´s like in the old movies. They make out on the couch. Damn. But I´m only and only accepting the whole thing if this is actually this time Jim using his sexuality as a weapon. Let this be Jim being the feme fatale seducing someone to gain leverage over them. Please. (Also with all the Sofia & Oswald parallels this (even if just plain actual love or lust) is so good.) 

* JIM GORDON looks so out of place in BARBARA KEAN´s weapon shop I love it. Seeing the spiked punk hair next along to the pristine blue velvet (?) sofas is wonderful. No one so far has been sitting on them right? The guys in the room drink from glasses and a wine bottle. Makes me think of if Barbara confiscated all the beer cans before they entered the place (doesn’t fit the aesthetic) and made them clean their combat boots. Jefferson Airplane “White Rabbit” always gets me. Barbara with the playing cards picks up the Alice in Wonderland theme. Her hair looks nice again. * “You like this me better?”  Barbara is still picking up there history but Jim isn´t even acknowledging it. Despite her new chill attitude it seems those things still matter to her? * RA´S and Barbara´s interaction are still oddly respectful, I wanna know more.

* The upside down EDWARD NYGMA cut was lovely, and I can relate writing is a struggle and you need knifes for it * I regret watching the preview, I think the sudden rap would have had more impact not knowing about it in advance. * “Well that´s exactly what you would say” Victor Zsasz just want´s to torture people he´s ready to find any reason for it. * The riddled invitations are all in vain Edward bursts into the Iceberg Lounge. There is some banter with OSWALD COBBLEPOT who then recognizes Ed is not quite himself. * “Six hours for two bad riddles does that sound like anything like the old you” “Revenge will make me feel better” “You wont have revenge on me” “Yeah I will” “No you won´t” “Only HE can get revenge on me”  This is prime Season 1 Oswald, bargaining for his life with eloquence and wits. He´s talked himself out of being killed, again. This would totally have worked without the reinforcement as well. * Edward gives in, okay freeze me, he says what Oswald´s surely please to here “I´m not the Riddler”. It saves him. “I would only freeze Ed Nygma, who cares about that. Better revenge is having you live, knowing that you are not him, and you never will be again.” I´m crying.  Also, I get the rhetoric’s but that´s just sentiment there. Oswald stabbed people for less, granted he´s had more time to think about things in that scenario but even in not so impulsive situations he´s never been Mr. Sadistic. He´s wallowed in having the upper hand (and consequently someone else suffering because of that) but he´s not into torture he´s not into that prolonged dragged out element of this, if someone suffers from his hand it´s more a straight line thing, clearer and done when done. His cruelty has function, often a message (Feeding Grace her children, the corpses in Sofia´s garden,) but he´s not wallowing in the cruelty per se. (Or am I forgetting something?)  

* What are the flowers in place of the Ice Sculpture. The pink suits the Iceberg Lounge but I need to know if those flowers go a particular meaning. * “Who am I”  Ed is back to the old question.

 * BRUCE WAYNE feels responsible for the Winthrop murder.  Well he should have thought about that earlier. If Alfred indeed advised him not to let the man have the knife overnight Alfred has some serious wisdom points over Bruce this week. I don´t really get why Bruce would be so reckless anyway. It was risky in terms of losing the knife and also in terms of risking other person´s well being. What got into him? Plot convenience?  * “Fear is normal” Poor ALEX WINTHROP. He´s a muffin. There´d be so many characters who would be mad at Bruce even if he truly actually didn´t have a clue about the knife. I find it a bit odd that they would trust each other that quickly and have such a conversation but I´m not questioning it cause it´s just too much of a beautiful scene. “Weirdly cool” 

* They both flee from some hunter and ANUBIS that Ra´s sent after the knife. What´s Egyptian mythology got to do with all this? How does he know how to track down the knife? Wouldn´t he like needed to have smelled it to recognize it? Has he, how old is he? Has he been killed with the knife and brought back to have a connection of what? Just in general what?! * Old me, good me, on track me would be so stressed out by all the mess with the books. * Also later:  Playing fetch with the bone. Are you serious ?! :D * “Hiding it in plain sight” Did I say I love Alex. I never know why people put the stuff in the most secure place. Put it in your hopelessly messy dresser. Let them dig though old and new socks, no pair matching not knowing if they are going to find anything there or somewhere starched between old documents and files, or maybe in an emptied shampoo bottle among (yeah I know the particular knife isn´t going to fit but you get the idea) lotions, soaps and things.   “The man that killed him, he can´t have this.” Could I love him more. Thinking about his Grandfathers words and them maybe being true he takes responsibility, he´s considerate. He´s not dropping it like hot coals that burnt his hand, he´s looking at his injuries wanting them to have some meaning. This guy killed his grandfather that´s reason enough for not doing him any favours of any way.  Alex is so dead, he´s so going to die, right?!

* JIM GORDON got his detective skills back this week. He´s easily deducting Alex´s escape, taking aid in Bruce, and that little story face off with RA´S AL GHUL was just lovely to watch: The boy is hunted because of the knife or because the killer thinks he saw something > Did he? > No. > Phew, well then he is safe.  I´d love to have seen them talk more, but yeah I get it it´s not Garak and Bashir. * ALFRED PENNYWOTH interrupts and promptly punches Ra´s. “Where the bloody hell is Gordon”  “He´s bloody vanished”   Jim is trying to get him stop the riot  “I need you to calm down”. This is a nice contrast to the recent just “set the butler loose” he´ll hurt people but things will be alright. Jim being the one recognizing sudden action and violence might not be the best thing long term is a nice change and it gives me tiny flash backs to the Jim Gordon from S1 who calmed down and defused dangerous situation.

 * BIG THING this week is people not telling Jim stuff. Bruce is not confiding in him until he is persuaded. Sofia is not letting Jim in on her plans, I hope she´ll stay clever and continue that. There is a big confrontation between Jim and Alfred about this. “You do not get to lecture me on a lack of honesty and openness” Alfred and Bruce were up to something for weeks. For once Jim is kind of right in his righteous rage. Alfred, as his guardian can violate privacy if for the sake of safety, Jim claims. Alfred is not having it. “Stick to the point” Having Pennyworth stay back and possibly arrested is petty and not a good call though. It will teach him a lesson is something for bickering lovers not people trying to safe someone. Alfred even picks that dispute up again later when Jim is trying to comfort Bruce and reason he needs to be talked to to be helpful “Ra´s is a psychopath, you are not responsible for his action. I wanna help but everything you´ve said so far ..  give me something I can believe.”  “Perhaps now you understand why we held back.”  Alfred jabs. I hope they get over the pettiness and will work together..

* “You don´t understand he, killed Alfred and then brought him back” Is this the week where they have the BRUCE WAYNE & JIM GORDON parallels reversed?  Usually it´s Bruce Wayne caring first and foremost about saving and protecting the lives of others (”even” if it´s the life of a thief 4x03) now he hesitates to hand over the knife in exchange for Alex´s life. Usually it´s Jim Gordon who risks the well being of others and steps over corpses for the sake of the mission and the grand picture.  Moreover did he really say “he” killed Alfred? While I would absolutely agree that all blame for this solely is to be put on Ra´s and Bruce is the victim in this. I find myself surprised that Bruce would say it that way. So far we´ve seen him feel responsible for what he did under Ra´s influence. I took him as someone who would not want to forget this, a cautionary detail to avoid similar things in the future. Seeing and putting the blame on someone else without keeping an eye on one´s own responsibility in the scenario (subjectively or objectively) is something Jim does. Bruce takes responsibility for his actions, he faces his mistakes. Yet this week he claims to have been unknowing about the dangers of the knife, (Don´t get me wrong in this situation it probably was the better and much more helpful option.) and he keeps risking more Winthrop lives.

* RA´S AL GUHL obviously is pleased with Bruce´s actions.  “Well done Bruce, you finally begin to see things clearly. The question is are you strong enough?”  

* After ALEX got killed (I knew it but argh) Bruce is back to. “This is all my fault” Despite Jim Gordon trying to tell him otherwise he´s confirming:  It doesn´t matter what you say, it´s all my fault, I killed him. Yep sounds more like the Bruce we know. The little trip into Jim Gordon ways did not agree with him.  I wonder what Ra´s would say to this. Probably that he isn´t strong enough. But I´d say admitting and recognizing such a thing needs strength.  Back to the parallel we´ve had Lee and others blame Jim for all the misery around him, while I have to disagree with quite some cases we haven´t seen Jim owning up to it or seriously second guessing his deed. We´ve only got clues that he´s quite miserable at times but he´s never set down being like yep you´re right that was wrong. Bruce´s gonna do that and keep doing that I assume ?

* “Sure but, how do you spell .. “  I feel called out I still look up how to spell Ra's al Ghul.  That and Oswald twice not being in the spot where Edward was waiting for him is adding so much “realism”. Cause that´s exactly how all those great plans would play out if it weren´t the movies.  “Honestly that could be anything” Oswald calls it about the riddles.  I also really loved the so absolutely done he can´t even properly handle his glass nor keep his hands out of is face attitude. There´s so much “I feel this”. Same with the petty bickering in between Oswald and Ed (you´re not smart, yeah well maybe because you froze me, I get revenge, no you wont, yes , no) and Jim and Alfred. There´s still been great statements in there but also some kind of spotonness . If it´s BenMckenzie solely responsible for this: Bless you.

* That tiny penguin pin on Oswald´s suit! * “My other Victor”  “Not you, the other Victor”  Mr. “the other” Victor Freeze. <3

[victorluvsalice]

Forgotten Vows Friday: Stealing "Asylum" Dresses

If you guys know me, you know that I'm not really interested in the possible "Alice: Asylum" prequel game American McGee is working on -- nothing against those who are excited about it, I'm just not personally into getting a prequel, and the current plot. . . Well, I've already tried to rewrite it. Twice. ^^; But there are a few things I like about it, and those things are -- a couple of the dress designs! Yeah, we've gotten a few cool arts on that front, and if some of my other AUs are any indication, I'm not opposed to sneaking in and nicking things I like from pieces of the "Alice" canon that don't usually make it into my stories (see everything I've used from the two "Otherland" shorts we got).

I bring this up because I've mentioned before that, for "In A World Of His Own," the "Victor and Alice in Victor's Otherland" story, I'm planning on reusing one of Alice's dresses from the Jules Verne Otherland short -- "To The Centre," the Journey to the Center of the Earth dress -- in Victor's Butterfly Jungle domain. And it occurred to me that there are currently two dress designs from the "Alice: Asylum" stuff I've seen that I wouldn't mind using in Forgotten Vows-related stories, if the opportunity ever came up -- the "Denial" dress and the "Ash" dress.

Denial Dress: This is a neat concept (a dress that's perfect in the front, but scorched and ruined in the back), and I like how it hearkens back to the original Alice illustrations, and how the colored versions put Alice in yellow instead of the blue dress we're all familiar with. I'm not sure where or how I could use the version shown in the A:A concept art (though it probably wouldn't look out of place in the Dollhouse as an alternate costume?), but a cleaned-up version could be useful for anything showing Alice as a child. (Or if she got a child version of herself to match Victor's "inner child" in the Butterfly Jungle. . .) Maybe the Liddells managed to save some pictures in the Land of the Dead?

Ash Dress: I've loved this dress since the first time I saw it -- it looks so cool! I especially like how parts of it are still glowing or flaking from the fire. :D And I know exactly where I'd use it if it came up in a story -- as the "domain dress" for the Land of Fire and Brimstone. I mean, world themed around fire, with the burned-out remains of Alice's house atop a mountain serving as the Jabberwock's old lair? The dress fits perfectly. (Honestly, I like the idea of an American McGee's Alice remake in which Alice is wearing the Ash dress throughout too -- it seems well-suited for that part of the saga!)

I haven't really come up for anything for any of the other dresses (though I rather like Alice's look in the "Bargaining" costume for another trip to Hatter's domain -- maybe that one I could adapt as a "real-world" outfit for her), but I'll keep you informed if I do! If only because I don't have much else to put here just at the moment. XD

[victorluvsalice]

Forgotten Vows Friday: Sharp Dressed Victor, Part I: Alice's Wonderland

Okay, so I got a really sweet comment over on AO3 on "Fixing You" at the beginning of the week from messrremuslupin:

I'm finally catching up (and forcing my housemates to read from the beginning and they're loving it btw!) and oh my god, your whole otherland design is so intricately designed and incredible. I definitely have to cosplay one of Victor's wonderland outfits!

The idea that people might want to cosplay some of the outfits I've made for Victor tickles me, so I figured I'd do a few quick posts on them and give some more detail on what they're supposed to look like! (I did do a list ages ago on my website, but I have some updates I want to make along the way, sooo. . .) First up: Victor in Alice's Wonderland!

Classic: “Traditional can sometimes be best.”

->Domain: Vale of Tears, any other domain without a specific suit

->Look: Navy suit jacket with the symbols for Jupiter and antimony in black on waist-level pockets; navy blue pants with vertical light blue stripes; white waistcoat with black decorative stitching; sky blue tie; silver A (alpha symbol) tie clip; white shirt; black boots with silver buckles

->Special Ability: Regain health when shrunk

((continued after read more))

Steamsuit: “Progress has its price.”

->Domain: Hatter’s Domain

->Look: Black suit jacket with the symbols for Mercury and arsenic in copper on waist-level pockets; black pants; brown leather waistcoat with multiple belts; blue butterfly-shaped bow tie; silver A tie clip; dirty white shirt; black fingerless gloves; black goggles with green lenses; black boots with silver buckles

->Special Ability: Breakables drop more goodies

Sunken: “Ideal for finding treasure hidden in the deep.”

->Domain: The Deluded Depths

->Look: Blue-green bathing costume with midlength sleeves and legs (hitting elbows and knees, basically) and glowing white horizontal stripes; green waistcoat with the symbols for Neptune and salt in dark blue on small waist-level pockets; green seaweed tie; silver A tie clip; bare feet

->Special Ability: Enemies drop more teeth

Eastern Master: “The cocoon to emerge from into new life.”

->Domain: The Mysterious East

->Look: Charcoal traditional Chinese silk jacket (front closure with fabric ball and loop clasps) printed with butterflies (multicolored) and musical notes (black) with the symbols for Uranus and phosphorous in jade on waist-level pockets; black pants with vertical charcoal stripes; white shirt, jade-colored necktie; silver A tie clip; black boots with silver buckles

->Special Ability: Enemies drop more roses/musical notes

Fifty-Two Pickup: “A suit fit for any King.”

->Domain: Queensland

->Look: Maroon suit jacket with the symbols for Mars and Descending Node (South) in pink on waist-level pockets; maroon pants with vertical light red stripes; white waistcoat with diamond and club card symbols detailing; blood-red tie; silver A tie clip; white shirt; maroon gloves; black boots with silver buckles

->Special Ability: Health is limited to four roses

Childhood’s Folly: “Embarrassing memories are always clearest.”

->Domain: The Dollhouse

->Look: Bright blue sailor suit shirt with white stripes on the collar and sleeves (almost overhanging his hands) and the symbols for Venus and Ceres in white on waist-level pockets; bright blue pants which are a good three inches too short; white collar bow smudged with dirt; silver A brooch in middle of bow; high grey socks; plain black shoes

Special Ability: Shrink Sense is active for twice as long

Hysteria: "If rage is what it takes to put some color in your cheeks. . ."

->Domain: N/A

->Look: Pure white suit jacket with liberal blood splatters, particularly on the hem; pure white pants similarly stained with blood; white waistcoat; white bandage tie heavily stained with blood dripping from neck; silver triangle (fire symbol) tie clip; white shirt; black shoes; whites of the eyes turn red, with blood dripping from the sockets; blood-drenched hands

->Special Ability: Temporary increased battle prowess and immunity to damage; enemies drop only roses/musical notes

Dusty Descent: "Hopefully you did not dig too deep for the treasures you seek."

->Domain: The Village of the Doomed

->Look: Earth-toned suit jacket smudged with coal dust; earth-toned pants similarly stained with dust; black waistcoat; glittery pale yellow tie; silver A tie clip; grimy white shirt; black shoes

->Special Ability: N/A

((Guess which one of these was a last-minute addition to “Fixing You” because I thought it would be cool to do an AMA “domain” outfit!))

[victorluvsalice]

Forgotten Vows Friday: Victors Aplenty In Otherland

Continuing last week's theme, let's talk about some of the characters I have pinned down for Victor's Otherland! Specifically -- what is mostly a bunch of other Victors, each representing a portion of his personality, who usually hang around the matching domain. In-universe, Alice theorizes this bevy of Victor clones is because of a difference in their handling their lack of playmates growing up -- she imagined herself as all sorts of different people, while Victor turned to his own mirror reflection and came up with all sorts of different solo adventures. Out of universe, I blame the fact that I came up with a lot of these initial ideas back when I was way into the webcomic "Narbonic," which on occasion featured characters talking to "personality sprites" -- various bits of their personality that manifested as miniaturized, winged versions of themselves (such as the classic devil and angel, social life (with butterfly wings), “part that never left high school,” etc). The Victors in his Otherland are regular size, and don't have wings (though I don't think any of them would mind), but they do at least dress accordingly:

-->The Artist: A Victor in a painter’s smock and traditional artist’s beret, stained with oil paints and ink. His fingers are also badly ink-stained, and he never goes anywhere without paper and a quill (tucked behind his ear when he’s not using it). As you might imagine, he hangs out primarily in Sketchbook World.

-->The Conductor: A Victor in a tailed blue tuxedo, very formal-looking, and with a conductor’s baton. As you might guess, he’s extremely musical -- but, due to Victor not liking just anyone hearing him play, also very shy. His domain is  Orchestralia, where he keeps the various instruments in rhythm.

-->Inner Child: A Victor about the age of the one we see in the opening picture of him and Scraps, wearing an explorer’s costume -- tan shorts and a tan shirt with lots of pockets, and a pith helmet. He loves exploring, particularly the Butterfly Jungle.

-->The Wizard: The only one that DOESN’T look like a Victor, this guy resembles a living version of Elder Gutknecht more, with a dash of Dr. Fixxler’s style -- deep purple robes with lots of stars, and the traditional pointy hat and long beard. Expectedly, he occupies the top level of The Magic Tower.

-->Desire: A Victor who tends to hang out in a dressing gown, this is the only one we actually see on-screen in “Fixing You.” He shows up after the climax as Victor’s. . .well, the fact that he tends to hang out in just a dressing gown should be a clue, right? He ends up in the Living Dead Forest by virtue of it springing up around him.

-->Anger: This Victor was originally going to have a part to play in “Fixing You,” but as the plot transitioned away from Victor worrying so much about his anger issues (though that still shows up in minor form), his role was cut. I still like his design though -- a Victor in a combined Hysteria Mode/Ragebox form (the white Hysteria suit and super-pale skin, Ragebox devil horns, tail, and claws, and red-on-red eyes). He doesn’t really have any one domain where he hangs out, though he does tend to wander into the Butterfly Jungle to keep an eye on the Inner Child. He’s kind of protective of kids.

[victorluvsalice]

Forgotten Vows Friday: Evolution of An Otherland

Since “Fixing You” is more or less the “official” introduction to Victor’s Otherland (after “Remembering You’s” brief glimpse post-Victor smashing the wall), I figured I might as well talk a little about how said Otherland has evolved over the years. There’s been a fair amount of changes, starting with:

-->Victor’s main domain used to be a field. Yeah, when I was writing some of the early bits of what would become the Forgotten Vows Verse, I had Victor often imagining himself in a field of some sort. I can’t pinpoint when I started thinking that loving the woods suited his character more, but I do know it had a big effect on the ending of “Remembering You,” as I’d originally planned for him to end up in a field after smashing the wall. I like the forest area I came up with a lot better, though. Trees are more him. (I think watching Nier: Automata around the same time and seeing the gorgeous Forest Kingdom stage there also helped.)

-->Once I decided on “forest, not field,” his main domain for a while was a place called the BurtonDead Forest. The idea there was that it was a forest that mimicked the layout of Burtonsville, with a town square, big trees where the anchoring buildings sat in reality, same paths in and out, that sort of thing. And it had random elements of the Land of the Dead thrown in -- like blue roses, and coffin benches.

And then, while writing the series, it slowly became apparent that Victor now hated his hometown, and the feeling was mutual, driven home by a line in “Fixing You” where Victor says he would have NEVER chosen his mental landscape to look like Burtonsville.

Okay then -- as you saw in my sneak peek, I adjusted the forested area appropriately. (And again, Nier: Automata’s Forest Kingdom was a big influence. Those big ravines are PERFECT for people with quad jumps.) I’m now calling it the Living Dead Forest, since that’s more indicative of what it is -- a place where Victor’s happy memories of the Land of the Dead merge with his favorite kind of natural retreat.

-->As mentioned before, “Silent Burtonsville” as Victor’s corrupted mental landscape has always been a thing ever since the initial “dry run” of “Fixing You’s” plot over on his old solo RP blog. I simply switched over from the traditionally foggy world to a rainy one because when I was editing, I didn’t think I was using the fog effectively, and I could more interesting things with the rain. (Example: When it starts bucketing down, Victor and Alice are in trouble from a certain enemy.)

-->Also as mentioned before, Victor’s music-themed domain used to be called “Musical Mayhem.” However, I came across the Alice fan-sequel Alice in Orchestralia while reading up books related to the original Wonderland duology on Wikipedia, and the name was too good not to reuse. So now it’s Orchestralia. Victor is mocked for the fun in “Fixing You,” though Alice notes she’s much worse at naming things.

-->Victor’s magic-themed domain, the Magic Tower (Victor isn’t very good at naming things either sometimes) used to be set in the middle of a desert, with just some dead scrubby flowers here and there. However, thinking about it later, I realized Victor would never want a domain to look so dull, so I’ve replaced it with the garden mentioned in the sneak peek (with strange plants and alchemical symbols grown in roses).

-->The domain that’s probably the best-developed in my head after the Living Dead Forest is probably the Butterfly Jungle -- mostly because I can just reuse ideas I’ve used for Secundus!Victor’s projects over there. XD The one that gives me the most trouble? Sketchbook World, Victor’s art-themed domain. I have a general sense of the aesthetic, it’s just hard to come up with creatures to populate it!