#and I am here again back at it (as in the time thoughts not the existential crisis)
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juniperskye · 3 days ago
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Corruption
Based on the following ask: Aaron with the youngest and newest member of the bau, taking her virginity in his office after hours, corrupting her in the most unprofessional way but praising her for being such a quick learner – I kind of went genius, girly-girl, virgin reader…but enjoy!!!
Aaron Hotchner x Fem Reader
SMUT
Word count: 1772
Not edited - please be kind. Requests are open and feedback is welcome if it's constructive!
Warnings: My blog is 18+, minors DNI, age gap (reader is early 20’s), explicit language, virgin reader, she’s also a genius and kind of a girly-girl, naïve reader, slight d/s dynamic, soft dom Hotch, corruption kink, lots of praise, use of sir, no use of y/n, Fem reader, reader has no physical description other than female anatomy, use of pet names, fingering, semi-public sex, oral (m receiving), p in v, unprotected sex (don’t do this), choking, pure filth tbh…let me know if I missed any!
I do not consent to having my work translated or reposted to any other site. That being said I do not own the characters portrayed in this story.
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It wasn’t the right time. That is what you said, time and time again, but then the right time never really came. First it was the high school boys were all too immature, then the college guys are all too pushy and unserious…and let’s face it, the guys in the FBI academy, well they were all too horny and desperate. So, you put all your focus into your studies and hard work. Who needed sex when you were achieving success at such a young age.
You were the youngest ever agent to join the BAU, even more so than Spencer. You’d been so motivated in school that you had dual majored during both your bachelor’s and master’s programs, finishing them in record time and completing your PHD while in the academy.
--
When you sauntered into Aaron’s office that day, trailing behind the director, he thought perhaps you were Cruz’s new assistant. With your tight little skirt and your long-painted nails, there was no way a sweet thing like you could be his new field agent.
Until you were.
“Hotchner, here is your latest recruit!” Cruz announced. “Be nice, she’s here to stay.”
You stepped forward and offered your hand to shake, quietly introducing yourself. Aaron took your hand, shaking it firmly before releasing it and gesturing for you to take a seat.
“You’re not at all what I was expecting.” He began.
“I hear that a lot. I don’t think people expect someone as accomplished as me to look this way.” You shift your gaze downward.
“How do you mean?” Aaron inquired.
“I just mean, I think people expect me to be a stereotypical nerd, seeing as I put my education first for so long. I don’t think they expect me to have put so much effort into my appearance as well.” You shrug.
Aaron was rendered speechless. You were right, when he had seen your long list of accomplishments, he was picturing someone a little more like Reid. Not a bombshell in a light pink blouse, tight skirt, heels and long pink fingernails.
And thus began Aaron babying you. He did everything in his power to keep you safe…which was becoming increasingly difficult as you continued to prove how qualified you were for this team.
--
He had been devastated when you’d been hurt the first time. It had been a slash of a knife to the shoulder, you’d ducked just in time to avoid your face. Aaron had been quick and pretty rough when taking that particular unsub down.
So, you see, it had been months like this and while…things were good, Aaron was overbearing, you were more than capable of holding your own and you didn’t understand why he was treating you this way.
That’s why you confronted him.
--
“Okay Hotch, what’s your problem?” You asked, entering his office unannounced.
“Excuse me?” He questioned you as you closed the door behind you and made yourself comfortable in the chair across from him.
“You know full well that I am capable of doing this job, so why do you purposefully hold me back?”
“Sweetheart, I’m just trying to protect you.” He justified.
“I don’t need you to protect me though.” You huffed.
“The fact that you think that only proves how innocent you are.”
“I – I’m not innocent.” You shook your head.
Aaron clicked his tongue, standing to walk behind you, letting his hands graze your shoulders gently. He leaned down, his warm breath hugging the shell of your ear, whispering.
“I think you are…but you don’t want to be.”
You shivered, leaning into his touch. “I don’t.” You breathed.
“You want to be bad, don’t you?”
“Yes.” You gasped.
“Then be bad sweetheart.”
--
Aaron walked over to ensure the bullpen was clear. He then locked his office door and pulled the blinds closed. He returned to his seat behind his desk, sitting and then wiggling his finger at you, signaling for you to come to him.
You stood and tentatively made your way around his desk, stopping just short of being in front of him. He took your hand and gently pulled you to stand between his legs. His hands slid down your sides, stopping at the outer part of your knees, tapping softly.
You looked at him with confusion…unsure of what it was he was asking you. Your confusion was answered when you saw the look in his eyes. You slowly dropped to your knees, your palms resting on his thighs.
“God, you’re like a vision. So sweet, on your knees for me.” Aaron caressed your cheek.
You reached for his belt, pulling it open, while he let his hand tilt your chin up to meet his gaze. Your mouth fell open in a gasp, his pupils were blown, full of lust. He let his thumb slip into your mouth, groaning at the sight of you.
You continued to work his dress slacks open, desperately trying to free his cock now. You were more than ready to have him in your mouth…but your nerves began to creep in. Aaron, ever the profiler, knew immediately.
“You’re doing great baby. I’ll walk you through it, don’t worry.”
You wrapped your hand around him, your fingers just barely out of reach of your thumb. As if that wasn’t enough, his length was quite shocking as well. You were sure you wouldn’t be able to take all of him, but you wanted to try.
“What if I…I mean – I want to be good.” You stuttered. “For you.”
Aaron groaned “You’re going to be amazing, sweet girl. Just start slow, it’ll come naturally.”
So, you did. Hesitantly at first, taking just his tip in your mouth, then moving down little by little. And judging by the sounds Aaron was making, you knew you were doing okay. You continued bobbing your head up and down, hallowing your cheeks and swirling your tongue around the tip, letting Aaron’s grunts drive your movements.
--
Aaron gently pulls you off of him, helping you back to your feet before lifting you onto his desk.  He stood, invading your space, your gaze shifts upwards to meet his…you just knew you looked completely wrecked for him.
Aaron leaned in and captured your lips in a searing kiss. He nipped at your lower lip, eliciting a gasp from you. He used the opportunity to slip his tongue into your mouth, one of his hands moving to cup your cheek and the other sliding under your skirt.
It wasn’t until his fingers grazed the front of your panties that you whined, practically begging for him to do more.
“Please…”
“Please what?” He teased.
“Please sir. Touch me.” You huffed.
Aaron groaned at the name and allowed his fingers to move passed your panties, pressing them through your slick folds. Your hands moved behind you, palms down, holding yourself up. Your head fell back and before long, Aaron’s fingers were thrusting into you. He kept a steady pace, not wanting to work you up too much before he got the chance to fuck you.
“Ugh, God yes. I-it feels s-so good.” You moaned.
“That’s it baby, you’re doing so good for me. Take it like a good girl.” He praised.
Your hips were chasing his every thrust, begging for your release. He pressed further, the heel of his palm adding a delicious pressure to your clit, bringing you that much closer to the edge.
“Please Aaron, I’m so close.” You begged.
“Not yet sweet girl, I want to feel you cum around my cock.” He nipped your earlobe.
--
Aaron pulled his fingers from your heat, taking a step back, he pulled you with him and spun you around, pressing your front into his desk. His hands slid under your skirt and pulled your panties down.
“Aaron…I-I’ve never done this before.”
“I know baby girl, it’s okay. I’m gonna take real good care of you.”
You arched back into his touch; your body was shaking with anticipation. Aaron leaned down and pressed a kiss to your shoulder before he nudged the head of his cock at your entrance.
“You ready for me honey?”
“God yes.”
With that, he pressed forward, fully sliding his cock into you. You cried out and he did his best to soothe you, wiping the tear from your cheek. His movement caused you to let out a sharp hiss.
“You alright sweetheart?”
You nodded, reaching behind you to grab at any part of him you could reach. He placed his hand into your grasp and held still, wanting to let you adjust to him properly. After a few moments, you pressed yourself back, testing the waters to see if the pain had subsided. Aaron quickly caught on to your motion and all hell broke loose.
--
Aaron’s hips snapped into yours over and over, he had your arms pinned behind you as he held you down against his desk for leverage. You were a mess beneath him, tears and mascara running down your face, your skirt bunched up around your waist, your hair fallen completely out of your neat hairstyle. Deep grunts and soft cries filled the room as you both neared your peak. He had you falling apart completely, surely ruining you for any other man.
“It’s like this pussy was made for me sweetheart; she’s gripping me so tight.”
“Oh my god Aaron, I-I think, I’m close.” You cried.
“That’s it honey, cum for me.”
Your orgasm took over as your entire body shook. Your screams could be heard all throughout the office. Aaron shifted his hands, so they gripped your shoulders, pulling you back to meet his thrusts, desperately chasing his end.
With a few final thrusts, Aaron let out a low growl, filling you with his hot seed. You could feel it dripping out of you with every lazy thrust. When he finally stilled, he leaned down over you, pressing kisses to your neck, whispering praise of how well you did for your first time and how he couldn’t wait to ruin you again and again.
--
Aaron slipped out of you with a hiss and tucked himself back into his slacks. He pulled you up and turned you around, helping you back into your panties and pressing his hand to your core.
“I want you to hold it in sweet girl. Because when I get you home, I’m gonna fuck it back into you.” He pressed his lips to yours once more.
You met him with the same amount of passion, only pulling away when he did.
“So…what does this mean?” Your glassy eyes met his.
“You’re mine baby. Forever.”
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Taglist: @bernelflo@pastelpinkflowerlife@just-moondust
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prlssprfctn · 1 day ago
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No matter if you choose to consider that Jason had the worst time ever in the League of Assassins or that, quite opposite, it was more or less okay, I think we all should unite and agree that Jason would be Ra's bane of existence. This boy is a brat. A certificated one, even. He is not an easy boy to handle, never and ever.
Ra's, after locking Jason up away from the society for a few days: Now. Do you realise what I am trying to say to you? You should focus on your studies. On your trainings. Forget about easy, normal life, about teenage shenanigans. Find peace. Throw unnecessary thoughts away.
Jason, yawning: Yeah, okay. Sure.
Ra's waking up in the 5am because someone is blasting NSYNC's Bye Bye Bye on the whole castle: Talia. What is this?
Talia, shrugging: Jason found old music speakers. He says he is... focusing like this. Just like you advised him to.
Ra's with his eye twitching: Is. he. Now.
Ra's: (accidentally trips on his cloak)
One of the Assassins, in their local comms: Chat, clip that
Ra's, frowning: What is that? What had you said? What is this nonsense?
Assasin: Uh, general had taught us—
Ra's: STOP LISTENING TO HIM, FOR GOD'S SAKE
Ra's: Talia, we need to send the boy to All-Caste. I think he needs some time away. From us. From me. Specifically.
(A certain amount time later)
Ra's, sighing in relief: Finally, peace—
Jason, spawning behind his back: Hi.
Ra's, groaning: YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO SURVIVE THE CLEANSING CEREMONY, OH MY GOD
Jason: Wanna check All Blade? It is kinda cool.
Ra's, pausing: ...Yeah.
Ra's farewelling Jason, who returns to Gotham: I have nothing to wish upon you. Be as annoying to Batman as you were to me.
Jason, smirking: Aw-w, I barely unleashed my annoyingness with you, Ra's. Bruce is going to suffer more.
Ra's: ...Good.
Ra's, closing the door behind him: Barricade the castle. Set bombs. I DON'T WANT TO SEE HIM HERE EVER AGAIN!!!
Also Ra's a half of a year later, watching footage of Jason terrorising everyone's life in Gotham, with tears in his eyes: That's my grandson. I am so proud of him.
Talia, raising her eyebrows: You tried to drown him in the Lazarus Pit. Twice.
Ra's: Shhh.
Talia: Then I'll invite him on holidays this year.
Ra's: NO.
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mcrdvcks · 2 days ago
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i love you, always and forever ࿐‧₊ first time - teach me how to love
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chapter summary: After he dropped hints for weeks, you finally give in to Logan.
word count: 11k+
pairing: Logan Howlett x fem!reader
notes: this is a bonus chapter! i consider this taking place before make you mine
this is the request that inspired this chapter
(you do NOT have to read the series to understand this oneshot. it's mostly smut)
warnings/tags: reader wears glasses, shy!reader, mention of twirling hair, fluff, smut, fingering, unprotected piv, creampie, oral (f!receiving), overstimulation, not proofread
series masterlist
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You turned the page of your book, the hum of some old movie playing on the TV in the bedroom. You were lying between Logan’s legs, your head resting below his chin while his hand absentmindedly twirled a strand of your hair. His other hand was draped over your stomach, fingers occasionally tapping against the fabric of your shirt like he had a thought he wasn’t quite ready to share.
“You actually readin’ that thing, or just pretendin’ to so I don’t distract you?” Logan’s voice was low, lazy, the kind of tone he only used when he was completely comfortable.
You didn’t look up from your book. “I was reading.”
“Was,” he echoed, amused. His fingers gave your hair a light tug before smoothing it down again. “So that means I am distractin’ you.”
You sighed, more dramatic than necessary, but the smile tugging at your lips gave you away. “Logan.”
“Darlin’.”
You tilted your head up, meeting his eyes. “You’re doing that thing.”
“What thing?”
“The thing where you get all smug just ‘cause I like being around you.”
Logan smirked, his fingers trailing absently along your side now. “That a bad thing?”
You sighed again, but this time, you leaned into him a little more, letting your book rest against your chest. “No.”
He chuckled, the sound rumbling against your back. “Didn’t think so.”
The movie flickered in the background, some old Western that Logan had flipped to out of habit. You doubted he was actually paying attention to it. His fingers skimmed over the hem of your shirt now, his touch slow, deliberate. He wasn’t pushing, wasn’t even making a real move—just there, lingering, testing.
“Y’know,” he murmured, brushing his knuckles along the sliver of skin just above your waistband, “I don’t mind you usin’ me as a pillow, but I gotta say, sweetheart… there are other ways to get comfortable.”
You didn’t take the bait, though your cheeks warmed at his tone. “I am comfortable.”
Logan let out a quiet hum, his fingers tracing the same path over your stomach. “Could be more comfortable.”
You swallowed, shifting slightly in his hold. “Logan.”
He leaned down, his lips ghosting over the side of your neck. “Just sayin’.”
You exhaled, turning the page of your book even though you hadn’t actually processed a single word. “You’re impossible.”
“Nah,” he murmured against your skin. “Just persistent.”
You bit the inside of your cheek, determined not to let him rattle you—at least, not too much. He wasn’t wrong, though. Over the past couple of weeks, Logan had been dropping hints, pushing just enough to see how you’d react. It wasn’t anything overt—no pressure, no expectation. Just a lingering touch here, a teasing remark there, the occasional kiss that lasted a second longer than it needed to.
He was patient, but he wasn’t subtle.
“You’re thinkin’ real hard about somethin’,” Logan murmured, his breath warm against your jaw.
You cleared your throat, keeping your eyes trained on your book. “Just… taking in the plot.”
“Uh-huh.” He didn’t sound convinced. His hand slid just a little higher, resting against your ribs now. “That book’s been on the same page for the last ten minutes.”
You sighed. “Maybe I just like this page.”
Logan huffed a quiet laugh, his lips brushing against your temple. “Yeah? What’s it about?”
You hesitated, then groaned, dropping the book onto your lap. “Fine. Maybe I haven’t been paying attention.”
He smirked, clearly pleased with himself. “That so?”
You turned your head just enough to meet his gaze. “You love being a distraction, don’t you?”
Logan shrugged, unbothered. “If it gets you lookin’ at me instead of that book? Yeah, sweetheart. I do.”
You rolled your eyes, but before you could fire back with something witty, Logan’s hand slipped beneath your sweater, resting warm and steady against your skin. The touch wasn’t rushed or demanding—just there, grounding, like he was waiting to see if you’d pull away.
You didn’t.
Logan took that as an invitation to tilt your chin up, pressing a slow, lingering kiss against your lips. He wasn’t pushing for more, but he wasn’t holding back, either. His fingers splayed against your stomach, his thumb brushing lazy circles over your skin.
By the time he pulled back, his smirk had softened into something quieter, something more certain. “See? Much better than readin’.”
You huffed a laugh, shaking your head. “You’re incorrigible.”
Logan grinned. “Yeah, but you’re still sittin’ here, ain’tcha?”
You opened your mouth to argue, but nothing came to mind. Because he was right.
And, more than that, you didn’t want to be anywhere else.
---
The sound of chalk against the board was somewhat soothing—it usually meant just you and equations. But it wasn’t as soothing today since Logan was leaning against your desk watching you as you wrote across the board preparing for class.
He’d been there for the past ten minutes, saying nothing, just watching, arms crossed, that infuriating smirk lingering on his face. You’d done your best to ignore him, focusing on writing out the equation, but every time you glanced over, he was still there. Still watching.
Finally, you sighed, setting the chalk down with a small clink. “Are you just gonna stand there, or are you actually here for something?”
Logan’s smirk deepened. “Dunno. Kinda enjoyin’ the view.”
You rolled your eyes, but your face warmed at the way his voice dipped just slightly, lazy and deliberate. You turned back to the board, trying to ignore the way his presence was making it difficult to focus. “Well, unless you suddenly got real interested in quantum mechanics, you’re gonna get bored pretty quick.”
“Nah,” he said, the sound of his boots scuffing against the floor as he shifted. “You’re way more interestin’ than whatever the hell’s on that board.”
You hesitated just briefly before picking the chalk back up, your grip tightening slightly. “Logan.”
“Y/N.” He mimicked your tone perfectly, and you could hear the smirk in his voice.
You turned to glare at him, but it was a mistake—because the second you looked at him, you were trapped. His eyes weren’t just amused; they were sharp, knowing, like he could see right through you. And he could, you realized with an exasperated huff.
“You’re distracting me,” you muttered, looking back at the board.
“Yeah?” Logan pushed off your desk, moving closer until he was standing right behind you. “Guess that makes us even, darlin’.”
Your breath hitched as his voice dropped, the warmth of him settling against your back even though he wasn’t touching you. It would be so easy for him to close the distance, to brush his hand against your waist, to tease you just a little further. But he didn’t. He just stood there, letting the silence stretch, making sure you felt him there.
Your grip on the chalk faltered, a small break appearing in the line of your equation.
Logan chuckled. “You sure you ain’t gettin’ distracted, sweetheart?”
You turned sharply, ready to snap at him, but the second you did, his hand lifted, fingers brushing a stray piece of chalk dust off your cheek. The touch was barely there, but it was enough to make your pulse stutter. His hand lingered for just a second longer than necessary before he let it drop.
“That’s better,” he murmured.
You swallowed, blinking up at him. His smirk had softened, something quieter settling in the way he looked at you. That look always got you—it was dangerous. It made you feel like you were the only person in the world who mattered to him. And maybe, in some ways, you were.
“You’re impossible,” you muttered, pushing past him to grab your notes.
Logan didn’t stop you, but as you moved, he caught your wrist, his grip gentle but firm. “Hey.”
You hesitated, looking up at him again.
“Dinner later?” His thumb brushed against your wrist, barely there.
You nodded. “Yeah.”
Logan’s smirk returned, but it wasn’t cocky—it was satisfied. “Good.”
And then he leaned down, his fingers holding your chin gently as he kissed your forehead, the tip of your nose, and then finally your lips.
His lips pressed against yours, slow and deliberate, and you felt the familiar warmth pool low in your stomach. Logan wasn’t in a rush—he never was when he kissed you. He liked to take his time, to savor, to leave you breathless in a way that made your head spin long after he pulled away. His fingers curled under your chin, keeping you close, his thumb tracing a slow line along your jaw.
His tongue flicked over your bottom lip, a slow, deliberate swipe before he pulled back just enough to meet your gaze. His smirk was lazy, self-satisfied, and entirely too smug.
“Cherry,” he muttered, his voice low, rough.
“You’re obsessed,” you said, trying to sound unimpressed even as your fingers curled into the front of his shirt.
Logan huffed out a quiet laugh, his hands slipping lower, resting heavy on your hips. “Ain’t my fault you keep wearin’ it.” His thumbs brushed against your sides, slow, absent-minded. “Like you want me to notice.”
You rolled your eyes, trying to ignore the heat creeping up your neck. “It’s just lip gloss, Logan.”
“Sure,” he drawled, clearly unconvinced. “Just lip gloss.” His grip on your hips tightened just a fraction. “You always wear this flavor, or is it just ‘round me?”
You opened your mouth, ready to argue, but the way he was looking at you made your brain short-circuit. His expression wasn’t just teasing anymore—there was something deeper behind his eyes, something unreadable but intense. It sent a shiver down your spine.
He leaned in again, not quite kissing you, just letting his lips hover near yours, close enough that you could feel the heat of his breath. “Go on,” he murmured, voice dropping even lower. “Tell me it ain’t for me.”
You swallowed hard, your pulse hammering in your throat. You weren’t sure what was more frustrating—the way he always managed to fluster you so easily, or the fact that he knew exactly what he was doing.
“I—” You hesitated, and Logan caught it immediately. His smirk widened, and you wanted to wipe it off his face, but your brain was too fogged up with the scent of him, the way his hands were resting so firmly on your hips, like he had no plans of letting go anytime soon.
“Thought so,” he muttered, finally pressing his lips to yours again.
This kiss was slower, more deliberate, his mouth moving against yours like he had all the time in the world. His fingers curled slightly, gripping the fabric of your sweater as he pulled you in closer. You felt the scrape of his stubble against your skin, the way he tilted his head just right, deepening it just enough to make you forget that you were still standing in the middle of your classroom.
When he pulled back, you were breathless, gripping onto his shirt like it was the only thing keeping you upright. Logan, of course, looked perfectly fine, his smirk still in place, though his breathing was a little heavier than before.
“Now, what were you sayin’ about this bein’ ‘just lip gloss’?”
You groaned, shoving lightly at his chest. “Logan.”
He caught your wrist before you could push him away completely, pressing a quick kiss to the inside of it before finally letting you go. “Alright, alright,” he said, still grinning. “I’ll stop—” He paused, then added, “—for now.”
You exhaled sharply, stepping back to put some space between you. “You’re impossible.”
Logan just chuckled, watching you with that same damn amused expression, like he was enjoying every second of this. And the worst part? He absolutely was.
You turned away quickly, trying to regain your composure, but you could still feel the heat of his hands on your skin, the ghost of his lips on yours.
“You still good for dinner later?” he asked, casually like he hadn’t just spent the last five minutes making you forget how to think.
You cleared your throat, adjusting your glasses as you grabbed your notes. “Yeah,” you muttered. “I’ll be there.”
“Good.” His voice was warm, satisfied. “See you then, sweetheart.”
And with that, he strolled out of the room like nothing had happened, leaving you standing there, lips tingling, heart racing, and entirely too aware of the fact that you were already counting down the hours until you saw him again.
---
The mansion was abnormally quiet. Most of the students were out for the weekend—some of the older students were looking after the younger ones—and the team was out doing a simple recon mission.
“One and a half cups of flour,” you muttered, leveling off the measuring cup before dumping it into the mixing bowl. The kitchen was unusually quiet, save for the occasional hum of the fridge and the rhythmic clink of your spoon against the bowl as you stirred.
“You talk to yourself when you bake?” Logan’s voice came from the doorway, rough with amusement.
You glanced up, pushing your glasses higher up your nose. “It helps me focus,” you said, reaching for the sugar. “And keeps me from messing up the measurements.”
Logan stepped inside, hands tucked into his jeans as he leaned against the counter, watching you. “Didn’t think you ever messed up.”
You huffed a small laugh. “Everyone messes up.”
“Not you,” he said, smirking. “Not when it comes to stuff like this.”
You shook your head, trying to hide the warmth creeping up your neck as you added sugar to the bowl. “Flattery isn’t going to get you cookies any faster.”
Logan just grinned. “Worth a shot.”
He stayed where he was, not offering to help, not interfering, just watching. He always did this—hovering without making it obvious, keeping you in his line of sight like it was second nature. You’d gotten used to it over the past few months, the way he lingered when you were focused on something, content just being there.
His presence was steady, familiar, something you had unconsciously grown comfortable with.
You reached for the blueberries, tossing a handful into the batter before mixing again. “You’re staring.”
Logan shrugged, smirk never fading. “You’re nice to look at.”
Your grip tightened on the spoon. “Logan.”
“What?” He tilted his head, completely unbothered. “I’m just statin’ facts, sweetheart. ‘Specially when you’re wearin’ this.” Logan tugged on the open placket of his flannel, the fabric loose over your frame.
You huffed, turning back to the mixing bowl. “It was just sitting on the chair. I didn’t think you’d mind.”
Logan’s fingers skimmed the hem, playing with the edge. “Didn’t say I minded.” His voice dipped lower, rougher. “Just sayin’ it looks real good on you.”
Your hands faltered slightly as you stirred the batter, but you kept your focus on the task at hand. “You’re just trying to distract me so I mess up these cookies.”
“Me?” He smirked, shifting closer, one hip against the counter now. “I’d never do such a thing.”
You shot him a pointed look. “You do it all the time.”
Logan let out a low chuckle, reaching over to steal a blueberry from the container beside you. “Alright, maybe I do. But it ain’t my fault you’re easy to rile up.”
You swatted at his hand before he could grab another berry. “You’re the worst.”
“Yeah?” He popped the blueberry into his mouth, chewing slowly. “And yet, here you are, wearin’ my shirt, makin’ me cookies.”
“I’m not making you cookies,” you said, stirring the batter. “These are the blueberries from Ororo’s garden. She wanted me to make cookies with them.”
Logan made a low sound in the back of his throat, arms still folded as he leaned against the counter. “That right?”
“Yeah.” You scooped another handful of blueberries into the bowl, mixing them in. “So, if you want cookies, you’ll have to take it up with her.”
He smirked. “Think she’d let me have one?”
“Maybe.” You flicked your gaze toward him, pretending to consider it. “If you ask nicely.”
Logan snorted, pushing off the counter to move closer. “You ever known me to ask nicely for anything?”
You gave him a look, reaching for the baking sheet. “Exactly.”
His smirk widened. “So that means I gotta find another way to get one.”
“You could just wait like everyone else,” you pointed out, dropping spoonfuls of batter onto the tray.
“Could.” Logan took another step forward, his fingers brushing against the hem of the flannel you were still wearing. “Or I could keep distractin’ you till you cave.”
You rolled your eyes, ignoring the way your heart picked up just from him being this close. “You’re not as persuasive as you think.”
He hummed, standing directly behind you now, his chest barely a breath away from your back. “That so?”
You swallowed, focusing intently on the cookies. “Yes.”
Logan leaned in just a little, his breath warm against your ear. “Don’t seem so sure, sweetheart.”
Your hands froze for half a second before you forced yourself to keep scooping batter. “I don’t give in that easily.”
“Mm.” His hands skimmed along the counter on either side of you, not touching, just there. “Good thing I like a challenge.”
You exhaled, willing yourself to focus. “The cookies go in the oven in five minutes. Think you can survive that long?”
Logan chuckled, low and deep. “Guess we’ll see.”
His hands finally lifted from the counter, and he stepped back, giving you space again—but not before trailing a slow fingertip down your arm on the way. It was barely anything, just a whisper of a touch, but it left a warm, lingering imprint on your skin.
You shook your head, ignoring the way your cheeks felt hot. “You’re the worst.”
He smirked. “You keep sayin’ that, and yet—” He tugged lightly on the sleeve of the flannel you were still wearing. “Still wearin’ my shirt. Still makin’ cookies.”
You sighed, finally turning to face him fully. “They’re Ororo’s cookies.”
Logan crossed his arms, amused. “Uh-huh.”
Your eyes narrowed slightly. “You really think everything I do is for you, don’t you?”
He grinned. “No. But I like knowin’ when it is.”
You groaned, turning back to the tray before he could see how much that stupid smirk was affecting you. “You are impossible.”
Logan just chuckled, watching as you slid the tray into the oven. “I’ll take that as a ‘yes, Logan, you can have a cookie when they’re done.’”
You shut the oven and sighed. “Fine. One.”
His smirk deepened. “Thought you didn’t give in that easily?”
You turned, poking a finger at his chest. “You’re pushing it.”
Logan caught your hand before you could pull it back, his fingers warm as they curled lightly around yours. He didn’t say anything at first, just held your hand, his thumb grazing over your knuckles in slow, easy circles.
Your breath caught, and for a moment, neither of you moved. The playful air between you had shifted, just slightly, into something quieter, something that made your heart beat a little harder.
“Y’know,” Logan murmured, his voice lower now, “I don’t just stick around for the cookies.”
You swallowed, your fingers twitching against his. “I know.”
Logan studied you for a long moment, then, with a small smirk, lifted your hand to his lips and pressed a slow, deliberate kiss to your knuckles. The warmth of it sent a shiver up your spine.
Your breath wavered, and Logan didn’t miss it. His smirk softened, his eyes flicking up to yours. “I’ll be patient, sweetheart,” he murmured, squeezing your hand once before letting go.
Your stomach flipped, but before you could even think of a response, he turned and strolled toward the door. “I’ll be back when the cookies are done.”
And then he was gone, leaving you standing there with your heart pounding and your hand still tingling from where his lips had been.
You took a slow, steadying breath, staring at the closed door for a long moment.
You were in trouble.
---
The night was like any other night. The TV was playing in the room, another old movie Logan had put on, while you read a book—1st to Die by James Patterson.
Your head was resting against his shoulder, while one of his hands absentmindedly stroked your thigh. His touch was steady, casual, like it had been for months now, but you could feel something else beneath it tonight. A quiet kind of intent.
Logan wasn’t subtle. Not really. He liked to pretend he was, but you had known him long enough to pick up on his patterns. The way his fingers traced absent shapes against your skin, his thumb brushing along the inside of your knee before trailing back down. Slow. Measured. Like he was waiting for you to notice.
You turned the page in your book, trying to ignore the way your heart had started to beat just a little faster.
“Y’like that one?” Logan’s voice was quiet, rough in the way it always was. His thumb dragged up again, stopping just beneath the hem of your shorts.
You nodded. “Yeah. It’s good.”
Logan hummed, shifting slightly so he could glance down at you. “Ain’t my usual, but I might give it a shot.”
Your lips twitched. “You barely read anything that isn’t a newspaper.”
Logan smirked. “Fair.” His fingers brushed higher this time, not quite pushing but not retreating either. “But if you like it, I figure it’s worth a look.”
You swallowed, trying to focus on the words in front of you, but they were blurring now, replaced by the warmth of his palm against your thigh, the way his hand lingered, waiting.
After a long moment, you set the book down on your lap and turned slightly, looking up at him. Logan watched you, something unreadable flickering behind his gaze.
His other hand lifted, fingers ghosting along your jaw before his thumb traced over your bottom lip, slow and deliberate.
Your breath caught. He didn’t move closer, didn’t push. He just waited.
It had always been this way with him. The teasing, the lingering touches, the quiet intensity that made your pulse stutter. He never rushed. He was never impatient with you.
But he wanted you to be the one to move first.
You hesitated only for a moment before tilting your chin up, closing the space between you.
The second your lips met his, Logan exhaled sharply through his nose, fingers tightening on your thigh. He kissed you slow at first, steady, like he had all the time in the world. But when he started to pull back, you chased him, your fingers curling into the front of his shirt to keep him close.
That was all it took.
Logan made a quiet sound in the back of his throat before he kissed you deeper, his hand sliding to the small of your back as he shifted, guiding you gently until you were beneath him, your back pressed against the mattress.
He hovered there for a moment, his weight braced on his forearms as he studied you, thumb brushing over your cheek.
“You sure?” Logan’s voice was quieter now, rougher.
You nodded, your fingers sliding up into his hair. “Yeah.”
Logan exhaled slowly, something easing in his expression before he dipped his head again, kissing you softer this time.
He grabbed your book and placed it on the bedside table without looking, without even breaking the kiss. His lips were slow, deliberate, savoring the way you yielded beneath him, the way your fingers twisted in the fabric of his shirt, pulling him closer.
His hand slid lower, over the soft fabric of his flannel that still draped over your frame, fingertips tracing the hem where it met your thigh. He pulled back just enough to look at you, smirking at the dazed look in your eyes. “Y’know,” he murmured, his fingers slipping under the fabric, brushing against your bare skin, “I like seein’ you in my clothes.”
You swallowed, trying to steady your breathing. “You’ve mentioned that before.”
“Yeah?” Logan tilted his head, his smirk deepening as his fingers trailed higher. “Think I might’ve understated it.”
You rolled your eyes, but the effect was ruined when he leaned in again, his mouth brushing along your jaw, then lower, dragging slow kisses down the column of your throat. His hands moved with him, one slipping around to the small of your back, the other pushing the flannel further up your thighs.
Your fingers found the hem of his shirt, tugging lightly. Logan hummed against your skin, then leaned back just enough to grab the collar of his tee, yanking it over his head in one smooth motion. The sight of him—bare-chested, golden skin catching the low light—made your breath hitch.
Logan chuckled, catching the way your gaze drifted over him. “Like what you see, sweetheart?”
You huffed, feigning exasperation, but your fingers betrayed you as they splayed over his chest, tracing the hard planes of muscle. “You’re cocky.”
His smirk widened. “Damn right.” He ducked down again, capturing your lips in another slow kiss, his body settling closer against yours. The warmth of him seeped into your skin, his weight grounding you as his hands continued their exploration, one drifting beneath the fabric of your—his—flannel, the other cupping the back of your neck.
His lips left yours only to find the sensitive skin beneath your ear, teeth scraping lightly before he soothed it with his tongue. “M’gonna take my time with you,” he murmured, his voice rough, his fingers skimming beneath the hem of your sleep shorts. “Gotta get you ready for me.”
Your breath hitched at that, and despite the heat pooling in your stomach, you still managed to murmur, “so cocky.”
Logan let out a quiet chuckle, nipping at your jaw before pulling back just enough to look you in the eyes. “That a complaint?”
You held his gaze for a long moment, then shook your head. “No.”
His smirk softened slightly, something warmer flickering in his eyes. He kissed you again, slower this time, more measured, before his hands resumed their path downward. The flannel slid off your shoulders, and Logan eased it down your arms, letting it pool around you before shifting his focus to your shorts.
His fingers traced the waistband, giving you the opportunity to stop him, to hesitate—but you didn’t. Instead, you lifted your hips just enough for him to slip them down, the fabric dragging along your legs before being tossed aside.
His hands traced back up, following the path they’d just taken, but this time there was nothing between you. His palms splayed over your thighs, fingers pressing in just enough to make you squirm before they trailed inward, brushing against the heat of you.
Logan exhaled sharply, his forehead resting against yours for a brief moment before he kissed you again, deeper this time. One hand stayed anchored against your hip while the other moved between your thighs, fingers teasing, exploring, until they found the slick warmth waiting for him.
His lips curved against yours. “So fuckin’ soft,” he murmured, tracing slow circles that made you gasp, your fingers gripping his shoulders. “And already so wet for me.”
Your breath stuttered, nails digging into his skin as his fingers worked you open, slow and careful, coaxing soft sounds from your lips that only made his own breath turn heavier.
“You always this sweet for me, darlin’?” he murmured, his lips brushing against your cheek, your jaw, your throat. “Or is this just ‘cause you’ve been waitin’ on me?”
Logan’s fingers curled just right inside you, pressing against that spot that made your breath stutter, your thighs twitching where they pressed against his hips. His smirk was small but unmistakable, lips brushing against your cheek as his fingers worked you open, slow and deliberate.
“You’re real sensitive, sweetheart,” he murmured, voice rough with something darker, something restrained. His thumb dragged lazy circles over your clit, and you whimpered, your grip on his shoulders tightening. He chuckled, breath warm against your skin. “Damn shame I didn’t do this sooner.”
You couldn’t answer—not with the way he was touching you, not with the heat pooling in your stomach, threatening to snap. Your head tipped back against the pillows, glasses askew, lips parted around soft, breathy sounds that you couldn’t hold back. Logan didn’t stop them. If anything, he worked for them, coaxing every little gasp from your lips like he had all the time in the world.
“That’s it,” he muttered, pressing slow kisses down your jaw, along the line of your throat. His fingers pumped into you steadily, stretching, teasing, dragging that pleasure higher. “Y’been waitin’ on this, haven’t you?”
“Logan—”
His thumb pressed a little firmer against your clit, and your words broke into a moan, your back arching into him. Logan groaned, deep and low, his mouth finding the hollow of your throat as he kept his rhythm.
“Christ, you sound good,” he muttered. “So fuckin’ sweet.”
You could feel yourself getting close, the pleasure building, sharp and electric, curling tight in your stomach. Logan felt it too—the way your thighs trembled, the way your breath hitched between each desperate sound.
“C’mon, darlin’,” he murmured, lips brushing your ear, fingers relentless. “Let me feel it.”
And you did—your body tensed, your breath breaking into a soft, gasping cry as you came apart beneath him. Logan cursed softly, watching you unravel, his fingers slowing just enough to help you ride it out.
You were still trembling when he pulled his hand away, bringing his fingers to his lips. He met your gaze as he licked them clean, eyes dark and heavy-lidded.
“Fuck, sweetheart,” he rasped. “You taste good.”
Your stomach flipped, heat rising to your cheeks, but Logan was already shifting, already pressing slow, deep kisses against your lips. He took his time, letting you catch your breath, hands steady as they stroked over your hips, your thighs, your waist.
“Still doin’ alright?” he murmured.
You nodded, breathless, fingers curling against his chest. “Yeah.”
Logan smirked, but there was something softer in it, something warmer. “Good.”
His hand skimmed down your side, slow and deliberate, rough fingertips brushing over the curve of your hip. He was watching you too closely, the way he always did when he wanted to be sure you were with him, when he needed to see it in your eyes.
You curled your fingers into his hair and pulled him back down to you, mouth meeting his in a kiss that was less careful this time. You weren’t thinking about shyness, about hesitation—just the heat of his skin, the weight of him pressing you into the mattress, the way his hands knew exactly where to touch.
Logan groaned low against your lips, his body settling fully against yours now, bare skin to bare skin, except for the one piece of clothing left between you. His jeans were rough where they brushed against your thighs, the contrast making you shiver as his hands moved—one sliding beneath you to brace your back, the other gripping your hip, his fingers flexing like he was grounding himself in the feel of you.
He kissed you like he was trying to memorize the shape of your mouth, the taste of you, like he wasn’t sure if this was real or if you’d slip through his fingers again.
You felt it in the way he touched you, in the way he lingered, his lips dragging from your mouth down to your jaw, the column of your throat. His breath was hot against your skin, each exhale rougher than the last.
“You still with me, sweetheart?” Logan murmured against your pulse, his voice low, rasping.
You swallowed hard, nodding before remembering he’d want more than that. “Yeah,” you breathed. “I’m with you.”
A muscle in his jaw twitched. His fingers tightened against your hip like he was restraining himself, like he had to be careful, because this was you, and even though he’d wanted this for so fucking long, he wouldn’t rush it.
Wouldn’t rush you.
His nose brushed against your cheek as he exhaled, long and slow, before kissing you again—slower this time, deliberate.
His hands started moving again, dragging over the softness of your waist, down to your thighs, his touch firm but steady, mapping you out, savoring. When he reached the inside of your knee, he eased it up, guiding your leg around his waist. The shift pressed you flush against him, and Logan let out a sharp breath through his nose, his forehead resting against yours for a moment like he needed to gather himself.
“Fuck,” he muttered, his voice nearly a growl. His hands flexed against you, one sliding down to your ass, gripping, shifting you just enough that the hard press of him against your core made you whimper.
Logan groaned at the sound, his head dipping, lips grazing your collarbone. “You don’t even know what that does to me,” he murmured, his mouth trailing lower.
You bit your lip, your fingers twitching against his shoulders. “I might have an idea.”
That pulled a rough chuckle from him, but it faded when you moved—when you shifted against him, pressing just enough to draw a hiss from his lips.
His restraint was slipping.
He was already worked up, and you could feel it, the tension coiling in his muscles, the way his breathing had gone ragged. He’d been patient, slow, but the way he was gripping you now, the way his hands were starting to tremble against your skin—he was close to losing that patience.
And you wanted him to.
You reached between you, fingers brushing along his stomach, the waistband of his jeans. Logan’s breath hitched, his hips twitching forward before he caught himself, gripping your wrist before you could go further.
“Darlin’.” His voice was tight, strained. “You don’t gotta—”
“I know,” you murmured, looking up at him. Your free hand brushed against his jaw, grounding him. “I want to.”
Logan’s grip on your wrist loosened at that, his lips parting, something flickering behind his eyes that looked a hell of a lot like reverence.
Then he let go.
You made quick work of his belt, the button, the zipper—your hands were steady, but your heart was racing. Logan watched you, his breath shallow, his chest rising and falling in uneven bursts as you shoved the last barrier down over his hips.
His skin was hot against yours, his body solid, strong, and when he settled against you again, when there was nothing between you anymore, you let out a sharp, shaking breath at the feeling of him, the sheer heat and weight of him pressing against you.
Logan groaned, his forehead pressing against yours. “Christ.”
Your fingers curled into his shoulders, legs tightening around his waist. “Logan—”
“I got you,” he murmured. His voice was softer now, and the hand on your hip slid lower. You made a soft, pleading sound, shifting beneath him, your fingers flexing against his skin. Logan exhaled sharply, his hand leaving you to brace himself above you again. His eyes met yours. “You sure?”
You nodded, but Logan didn’t move. He needed to hear you say it.
“Yes,” you murmured, your voice quiet but sure. “I’m sure.”
Something in his expression eased, and then—
He pushed in, slow, steady, careful.
Your breath caught. Logan groaned, low and rough, his head tipping forward, his body shuddering as he fought to keep himself controlled.
“You feel so fuckin’ good,” he muttered, his voice thick, strained. His hands flexed against you, his breath ragged against your skin as he pushed in deeper, filling you completely.
You gasped, gripping his arms, your body stretching to take him, adjusting around him. Logan cursed softly, his forehead pressing to your shoulder, his hands shaking against you.
“Tell me if—” His voice was almost wrecked. “If I need to slow down, I will.”
You shook your head, breathless. “You’re perfect.”
Logan let out a quiet, shuddering exhale. “Fuck.”
His hips pulled back, then pressed forward again, slow, measured. His restraint was there, barely, his muscles taut beneath your hands, his movements careful but not hesitant.
You moaned softly, your body arching into him, and Logan swore under his breath, his grip tightening on your hips.
“Goddamn,” he muttered. “You feel like you were made for me.”
You trembled beneath him, overwhelmed by the heat, the weight, the way he filled every part of you so completely. Logan was holding himself together by a thread, his hands flexing against your hips like he was steadying himself, grounding himself in the feel of you. His breath was heavy against your skin, rough and uneven, his forehead pressing against yours as he stilled inside you, letting you adjust.
“Jesus, darlin’,” he muttered, his voice wrecked. “You—” He cut himself off, exhaling sharply through his nose. “Fuck.”
Your fingers curled against the broad planes of his back, nails digging into firm muscle as you took a shaky breath. He was big—not just in size, but in presence, in weight, in the sheer way he surrounded you, body and soul. You weren’t sure you’d ever felt this full before. It was almost too much. Almost.
But Logan wasn’t rushing.
He didn’t move, didn’t push. He just stayed there, his body taut with restraint, his jaw tight. His thumb traced absentminded circles on your hip, a small, grounding motion against the intensity of everything else.
“You okay?” His voice was rough, thick with the effort of holding himself back.
You swallowed, nodding, but when you saw the way he was watching you—his eyes dark, searching—you knew that wasn’t enough. “Yeah,” you murmured. “I’m okay.”
Logan’s throat bobbed as he exhaled slowly, like he needed to hear it, needed the confirmation.
Still, he didn’t move right away. He stayed just like that, warm and solid above you, one hand slipping up to cradle the side of your face, his thumb brushing over your cheekbone.
It was gentler than you’d expected. You weren’t sure why—you knew Logan was careful with you, always. He was rough around the edges, sure, but with you, he never let himself be careless. Even now, even with his body wound tight as a wire, he held himself back, waiting for you to let him know it was okay.
You exhaled softly, tilting your head just enough to brush your lips against his in a slow, lingering kiss. Logan groaned low in his throat, the hand on your hip tightening fractionally, but he didn’t deepen it—he let you set the pace.
You pulled back just enough to whisper against his mouth. “You can move.”
Logan’s whole body tensed at that, his breath hitching. “Fuck,” he muttered, his forehead pressing against yours again like he was collecting himself. Then, after a long moment—
He pulled back, just a little, before pushing forward again, slow and steady.
The stretch had you gasping, your fingers tightening against his shoulders. Logan gritted his teeth, cursing under his breath as he did it again, his pace careful, deliberate, as if savoring every inch of you.
“You’re so goddamn tight,” he muttered, voice rough as gravel. His lips brushed your temple, his breath warm against your skin. “So fuckin’ perfect.”
Heat curled in your stomach at the way he said it—like he couldn’t believe this was real, like he couldn’t believe he had you beneath him, wrapped around him like this.
Your thighs squeezed around his waist instinctively, and Logan groaned, his hands gripping you tighter.
“Darlin’,” he rasped, his voice strained. “You keep doin’ that, I ain’t gonna last.”
You swallowed hard, your head tipping back against the pillow. “Sorry,” you whispered, your voice shaky.
Logan let out a rough chuckle, his lips brushing the side of your neck. “Ain’t complainin’.”
He thrust again, just a little harder this time, and you let out a soft, broken sound, your back arching. Logan groaned, his teeth scraping along your jaw before he kissed you again, deeper this time, his tongue sliding against yours in a slow, drugging rhythm that matched the roll of his hips.
Your hands slid up his back, over the warm expanse of skin, tracing the dips and ridges of old scars. Logan shuddered beneath your touch, his muscles flexing under your fingers.
His mouth left yours only to drag lower, down the line of your throat, over the curve of your shoulder. “Goddamn,” he muttered against your skin, his voice thick with want. “I’ve wanted this—” He cut himself off with a groan, his fingers flexing against your waist. “You don’t even know how long.”
You whimpered softly, tightening your legs around him. “Then don’t hold back.”
Logan’s head snapped up at that, his breath catching. His eyes locked onto yours, something dark and wanting flashing behind them.
For a second, you thought he might tease you, draw it out longer—but something in your voice must have struck him, because Logan let out a rough breath and gave you exactly what you asked for.
He started moving in earnest now, his rhythm still measured but deeper, more insistent, dragging pleasure from you with every roll of his hips. Your breath hitched, your nails pressing into his shoulders as heat coiled in your stomach, sharp and electric.
You gasped as he thrust again, your body tightening around him. “Logan—”
He groaned at the way you said his name, his fingers digging into your hips. His pace faltered for a second, like he was struggling to keep himself controlled, like he was on the edge of losing himself completely.
And maybe you wanted him to.
Your hands slid up to cup his face, guiding him back down into another kiss, one that was messier now, more desperate. Logan growled against your lips, his movements turning just a little rougher, just a little faster, and you moaned into his mouth, your body arching up to meet him.
You could feel yourself getting close, the pleasure building, tightening, making your breath come faster. Logan felt it too—the way your body trembled, the way your breath caught.
“C’mon, sweetheart,” he muttered, his voice wrecked, his hips rolling into yours just right. “Let me feel you.”
The coil snapped.
You cried out, your body shuddering as you came around him, the pleasure cresting over you in sharp, dizzying waves. Logan cursed, his hands gripping you tight as he followed, his rhythm stuttering before he buried himself deep, groaning low against your throat as he let go.
For a long moment, the only sound in the room was heavy breathing, the quiet hum of the TV still playing in the background. Logan stayed there, his forehead against yours, his hands still steady on your hips, like he wasn’t ready to let go just yet.
Then, slowly, he shifted, pulling you into his chest as he rolled onto his side, keeping you close, keeping you warm. His breath was still heavy, but his hands were gentle as they traced over your back, his lips pressing softly against your temple.
“You alright?” he murmured, voice still rough around the edges.
You nodded against his chest, your fingers curling into his skin. “Yeah.”
Logan exhaled slowly, something easing in his expression. “You stayin’ here tonight?”
You huffed a quiet laugh, pressing your face into his shoulder. “I think that’s a given.”
Logan smirked against your hair. “Good.”
---
Bonus Scene
He couldn’t help himself—you looked cute today. To others, it was just a regular outfit, slacks and a sweater, but the difference was those damn heels.
Logan leaned against the wall, arms crossed, watching as you walked down the hall, completely unaware of the effect you were having on him. The soft click of your heels against the floor was downright distracting, and the way they made you stand just a little taller—closer to him—wasn’t helping, either.
You adjusted your glasses, scanning over the notes in your hand as you made your way toward the classroom. Logan smirked to himself, shaking his head. Of course, you were completely oblivious.
He pushed off the wall and fell into step beside you. “Fancy shoes, sweetheart.”
You glanced up at him, brow furrowing slightly before realization dawned. “Oh. Yeah.” You adjusted your grip on the papers, glancing down at them. “I don’t wear them often, but I figured I should—”
“Keep ‘em.” Logan cut you off before you could finish whatever practical reason you were about to give.
You blinked up at him. “What?”
His smirk deepened, eyes dropping briefly to your heels before dragging back up. “I like ‘em.”
Your lips parted slightly, as if you wanted to say something, but instead, you quickly looked back at your papers, clearing your throat. “They’re just shoes, Logan.”
“Uh-huh.” Logan’s voice was amused, his smirk never fading.
He could see it—the way you fidgeted slightly, the way your grip tightened just a little on the papers. You were flustered, and it was adorable.
You reached your classroom, your free hand on the doorknob, but before you could step inside, Logan’s hand landed on your hip, pulling you back just enough that you felt the warmth of him behind you. He leaned in, lips brushing the shell of your ear.
“They make your legs look real nice, too,” he murmured.
You inhaled sharply, your back straightening. “Logan—”
“Yeah, sweetheart?”
You turned your head just slightly, your cheek barely grazing his. You opened your mouth to say something—probably a scolding, judging by the look in your eyes—but Logan just grinned, giving your hip a final squeeze before stepping back.
“See you later, darlin’.”
And with that, he walked off, leaving you standing there, flustered and gripping the doorknob like it was the only thing keeping you upright.
Yeah. He was definitely keeping those heels around.
---
You didn’t wear them again for a while—you usually would only consider wearing them on days when you didn’t have to be in the lab.
So, a few weeks later they were on again. The day went on normally, no interruptions from Logan, at least not any more than usual, and by the end of the workday you were glad to finally take them off.
You had already taken off your cardigan, leaving you in a simple t-shirt, and now you were unstrapping your heels.
The second heel slid off your foot with a relieved sigh. You flexed your toes against the carpet, rolling your ankles slightly. You hadn't even heard Logan come in—not until his voice rumbled from the doorway.
“Lemme help, sweetheart.”
Your head snapped up, caught halfway through massaging the arch of your foot. Logan was already moving toward you, dark eyes locked onto yours with that unreadable expression, something steady and sure. The kind that made your breath hitch.
“You don’t have to—”
He crouched down in front of you before you could finish, already reaching for your legs. Large hands wrapped around your calves, rough fingers kneading into muscle as he lifted one foot, pressing his thumb into the soft ache just beneath your toes.
A quiet breath left you, head tipping slightly back at the relief of it. He chuckled, low and knowing.
“Yeah, figured they’d be sore. Been watchin’ you walk around in ‘em all day.” His fingers trailed down, slow and deliberate, past your ankle and along your shin, stopping just above your knee. He looked up then, and something about the way he did it—half-lidded, knowing—made heat bloom low in your stomach.
His hands didn’t move away. Not when he squeezed gently, dragging his palms down the length of your legs again, not even when his fingers hooked into the waistband of your slacks.
Your breath caught. “Logan…”
He hummed, a wordless sound of acknowledgment, but he didn’t stop. He unbuttoned them slowly, eyes flicking up to yours. “Just helpin’ you get comfortable, darlin’.”
You should’ve expected it—Logan wasn’t the type to stop at just your shoes. But still, the sensation of your slacks being eased down, the brush of cool air against your thighs as he worked them off, sent a shiver up your spine.
And then, just as you were about to stand, assuming this was about changing into something else, Logan’s hands were on your hips, pushing you back down.
Your brows furrowed. “I thought—”
But Logan was already reaching for the heels again. He slid them back onto your feet, slow, deliberate. His fingers lingered as he adjusted the straps, the rough scrape of his calloused skin against your ankle making your pulse stutter.
Your lips parted, about to ask what he was doing—but before you could, he pressed a firm hand to your thigh, spreading you open just enough, and then he was moving lower, kneeling between your legs.
The realization hit all at once.
“Logan—”
His hands gripped your thighs, pulling you just that much closer to the edge of the bed. He exhaled sharply, and you could feel it—hot, teasing, right against the thin cotton of your underwear. His nose brushed against the fabric, and the sound that left him was almost a growl.
“Been thinkin’ about this all damn day,” he muttered. One of his hands slid up, fingers pressing into the meat of your hip, while the other smoothed down to hook around the back of your knee.
You swallowed hard, fingers curling into the sheets. “You—” Your voice hitched when his mouth brushed against you again, this time with intent. “You could’ve just said so.”
He chuckled against you, lips dragging over the fabric, teasing. “Nah,” he murmured. “Better like this.”
His tongue traced along the dampening fabric, slow and unhurried, dragging just enough to make you squirm. The first real sound of pleasure slipped from your lips before you could swallow it down. He made a noise of approval, pressing his mouth more firmly against you.
Your fingers twitched against the sheets, breath coming faster. “Logan…”
Logan’s breath was hot against you, teasing, his mouth hovering right where you needed him but refusing to give in just yet. His hands stayed firm on your thighs, thumbs pressing circles into your skin, like he had all the time in the world.
Your fingers curled tighter into the sheets, your breath coming in uneven, shallow little bursts. "Logan—"
"Yeah, sweetheart?" His voice was deep, roughened by amusement, like he already knew what you wanted but wanted to hear you say it anyway.
Your nails dug into the fabric beneath you, and Logan chuckled—low, pleased. He pressed a kiss over your underwear, slow and deliberate, letting his lips linger before dragging his tongue over the fabric. The heat of his mouth seared through, and your hips jerked involuntarily.
He groaned, hands flexing against your thighs. "Knew you'd be sensitive."
A flush burned hot up your neck, your head tipping back as his fingers traced slow, teasing lines up and down your legs, just enough pressure to keep you on edge but not enough to satisfy. He slid his hands up, past your knees, before hooking his arms beneath your thighs, pulling them up, over his shoulders.
Your breath caught as your calves rested against his broad back, the heels he had insisted you keep on grazing against his muscles. His grip tightened, locking you into place, and something about the sheer strength of him—the way he held you like this, open, vulnerable, completely at his mercy—made your stomach clench.
He pressed a slow, open-mouthed kiss against your thigh, then another, working his way back toward the soaked fabric between your legs. His tongue flicked out again, just enough pressure to make you squirm, before he pulled back with a smirk.
"Logan," you breathed, frustration seeping into your tone.
His eyes flicked up, dark and hungry. "What, darlin'?"
"You—" Your fingers curled into the sheets again, your voice catching as he flattened his tongue against you, pressing hard enough that you felt every inch of him through the fabric. Your back arched instinctively, a soft, broken sound slipping from your lips.
That noise seemed to snap something in him.
Logan growled, deep and guttural, his fingers hooking into the waistband of your underwear. In one slow, deliberate motion, he dragged them down, letting them catch around your knees before finally tugging them free. His hands didn’t waste any time, gripping the backs of your thighs again, pulling you even closer.
"That's better," he muttered, almost to himself.
And then his mouth was on you, hot and relentless.
A gasp tore from you, your thighs instinctively trying to clamp shut, but his grip held you open. His tongue worked slow at first, dragging long, torturous strokes through your folds, before circling right where you needed him most.
Your breath stuttered. "Oh—"
Logan groaned, the sound vibrating through you. "That’s it, sweetheart," he murmured against you. "Let me hear you."
You bit your lip, trying to keep some of the sounds at bay, but he didn’t like that. His hands squeezed your thighs in warning before his mouth sealed around your clit, sucking just enough to make your entire body jolt.
A cry ripped from your throat.
"Atta girl," he praised, the words sending a fresh wave of heat down your spine. His grip adjusted, hands sliding lower, past your hips, thumbs pressing into the crease where your thighs met your body. Holding you still. Keeping you exactly where he wanted you.
His tongue was merciless, alternating between slow, deliberate strokes and firm, insistent pressure that had your thighs trembling against his shoulders. Every flick, every graze of his teeth, sent electricity sparking up your spine.
You didn’t even realize you were babbling his name until he groaned in response, pressing his mouth harder against you. The pressure built fast, white-hot and overwhelming, your whole body tightening as the coil in your stomach threatened to snap.
"Logan, I—" Your voice cracked, desperate, hands flying to grip his hair, tugging without thinking.
That was all it took.
Logan growled against you, and then his tongue was working you over with ruthless intent, flicking and sucking in a way that sent you crashing over the edge. Your body tensed, your back arching, his name spilling from your lips in broken, breathless gasps as pleasure wracked through you.
He didn’t stop.
Your thighs trembled against him, your whole body oversensitive, but Logan didn’t let up. His grip stayed firm, his tongue still dragging through your folds, teasing, relentless.
A whimper slipped from you, half-plea, half-helpless moan.
“Mmm, Logan?”
Your voice trembled—soft, breathless, still caught in the aftershocks of your first climax, and Logan felt it. The way your thighs quivered against his shoulders, your calves resting against his back, those damn heels grazing along the muscles of his spine. He exhaled sharply through his nose, lips still pressed to the slick heat between your legs.
“What, sweetheart?” His voice was low, rough, vibrating against you.
Your breath hitched. The heat of Logan’s mouth lingered against you, his tongue flicking one last, teasing time before he dragged his lips back up to press against the soft skin of your inner thigh. You twitched beneath him, a small tremor still rippling through your muscles, breath unsteady, fingers weakly curled into the sheets.
“I thought you were—”
Your voice caught as his teeth scraped lightly over your thigh, right where it was still damp from his mouth. He hummed, low and thoughtful, and didn’t move away. If anything, he settled in deeper, his broad hands tightening around your thighs, thumbs smoothing up toward the curve of your hips.
“Done?” His voice was all rough amusement, muffled against your skin.
A shaky exhale left you.
His lips curved. “Oh, sweetheart.” A kiss, slow and open-mouthed, right at the crease of your thigh. “You really think I’m done with you?”
Your breath stuttered. He hadn’t moved back—hadn’t given you any space to recover. He was still right there, his mouth still hovering over sensitive skin, his breath warm, teasing, pressing against you like a promise.
You swallowed, fingers flexing against the sheets. “I—”
He turned his head slightly, his nose brushing right where you were still slick, still sensitive. Your whole body jerked at the touch, an involuntary sound breaking in your throat.
Logan groaned. “That’s what I thought.”
And then his hands were on your hips again, sliding up your sides, holding you steady as he buried his mouth back between your thighs.
A gasp ripped from you, your body jolting at the sheer intensity of it. You’d barely come down from the first wave of pleasure, your skin still too sensitive, too raw—but Logan didn’t care. He was relentless, tongue pressing deep, slow, deliberate, dragging up before circling back around your clit.
You whimpered, your hands flying back to his hair, twisting in the thick strands.
He groaned again at the pull, the vibration of it sending another sharp, overwhelming pulse through you.
“Fuck, you taste good,” he muttered against you, voice thick, wrecked. “Could do this all night.”
Your legs trembled. You didn’t doubt him.
He worked you open with his tongue, slow and indulgent, taking his time, like he had nowhere else to be, no other priority but this—this, and the way you came apart in his hands. He pulled you closer, dragging your thighs up higher over his shoulders, making sure you couldn’t squirm away.
The position shifted something, the heels on your feet sliding slightly against his back, the small sharp drag of them making him grunt.
His tongue flicked over you again, lazy, slow, savoring. He had you completely at his mercy, held tight in his grip, and he knew it.
“Logan,” you gasped, voice breaking.
He smirked against you. “That’s it, darlin’.” His tongue circled once, twice, before he sealed his lips around you again, sucking just right.
The pleasure built fast, unbearable, twisting in your stomach like a live wire sparking beneath your skin. Your breath hitched, your thighs shaking against him, the grip you had in his hair tightening as you tried to ground yourself.
Logan groaned, deep and approving, and then he doubled down. His mouth was insatiable, his tongue working you open, pushing you right to the edge without hesitation.
You felt it hit—sharp and sudden, your whole body tensing as your second orgasm crashed through you.
A sob caught in your throat. Logan didn’t stop.
He rode you through it, drinking in every sound, every twitch of your hips, every broken whimper that left you as you shattered against his mouth. He held you steady, his tongue still teasing, slow, languid, like he was tasting you, savoring the way you trembled for him.
You barely had time to catch your breath before he moved up, dragging his lips along your stomach, pressing slow, hot kisses as he went.
“Think you can give me one more, sweetheart?” he murmured against your skin.
Your breath was still coming fast, your body still tingling with aftershocks. “I—”
"Yeah, darlin’," Logan rasped against your thigh, the vibration of his voice sending another tremor through your oversensitive body. He wasn’t asking—just waiting. Waiting for you to tell him no, to push at his shoulders, to make some attempt at stopping him.
You didn’t.
A deep, satisfied hum rumbled through his chest, his stubble dragging against the tender skin of your inner thigh as he pressed another open-mouthed kiss there. His hands stayed firm at your hips, thumbs smoothing slow, absent circles against your flushed skin.
"You got one more in you," he muttered. Not a question. A promise.
Your fingers curled weakly into the sheets, your chest rising and falling in uneven breaths. "Logan, I—I don’t think—"
"You can." His voice was thick, low, possessive. His hands flexed against you, grounding, holding you still like he could feel the way your legs wanted to clamp shut, your body already overwhelmed. "I got you."
And then his mouth was on you again.
A sharp gasp tore from your throat, your back arching as the wet heat of his tongue pressed against your still-sensitive clit. It was too much—the pleasure too sharp, too immediate, your nerves already frayed and exposed from the last two times.
Your hand flew to his hair, fingers tangling in the thick strands, pulling without thinking. Logan groaned against you, the sound vibrating through every inch of your body, his grip tightening in response.
"Fuck," he breathed, pulling back just enough to murmur against your skin. "You’re still so fuckin’ sensitive, huh?" He didn’t wait for an answer. Just grinned against you before dragging his tongue through your folds again, slow, deliberate, like he was savoring every reaction, every helpless little sound that slipped from your lips.
Your breath hitched, thighs trembling against his broad shoulders. "I—Logan, I don’t—"
"Shhh, sweetheart." His voice was rough, but his touch was steady, unwavering. His hands slid up your sides, fingers splaying over your ribs, grounding you. "Just let me take care of you."
Your stomach clenched, your body torn between pushing him away and pulling him closer. You were too sensitive, too overwhelmed—but Logan wasn’t relenting. He was dragging you over the edge whether you were ready or not.
His tongue pressed deeper, slow and indulgent, before curling up just right, and your body jolted, a sharp cry breaking from your throat. Logan growled at the reaction, his hands gripping your hips tighter as he kept you pinned beneath him.
"You feel that?" he muttered against you, the heat of his breath making you shudder. "How fuckin’ good you taste?" His tongue flicked against you again, making your whole body jerk. "Bet you don’t even know what you do to me."
You moaned, the sound half-frustrated, half-helpless. Your thighs clenched around his head, but Logan only groaned, pressing himself deeper against you, like he wanted to drown in the feeling of you coming apart beneath him.
Your grip in his hair tightened, pulling hard enough to sting. "L-Logan—"
"That’s it," he growled. "Say my name, sweetheart."
You did. Over and over, broken and breathless, as his mouth worked you open, relentless and unforgiving. His tongue was precise, knowing, dragging slow and then fast, flicking before sucking, giving you just enough to send another sharp pulse of pleasure tearing through you.
The coil in your stomach wound tight—too tight, too fast.
You felt it coming, and so did he.
"Give it to me," Logan muttered against you, his voice almost desperate. "Come on, darlin’."
And then he sucked—hard.
White-hot pleasure ripped through you.
Your whole body tensed, your back arching, your breath catching in a sharp, broken cry. The orgasm slammed into you with dizzying force, a wave so intense it nearly knocked the air from your lungs. Your thighs clamped around his head, your fingers fisting in his hair, your entire body trembling against him.
Logan groaned, dragging his tongue through the mess he’d made, working you through every last tremor, every aftershock, until you were nothing but a shivering, spent mess beneath him.
Only then did he slow, his movements easing from hungry and desperate to slow and indulgent, like he was committing the taste of you to memory.
Your breath came in short, uneven gasps, your body completely limp against the mattress. Logan finally pulled back, pressing one last open-mouthed kiss to the inside of your thigh before lifting his head.
His lips were slick, his pupils blown wide, his expression dark with satisfaction as he looked up at you.
"Told you," he murmured.
You could barely manage to lift your head, still dazed, your limbs uncooperative. "Told me what?" you managed, voice hoarse.
His smirk deepened, and he reached up, gripping your ankle. His thumb brushed over the strap of your heel, gaze flicking to where it still sat, perfectly in place on your foot.
"Told you I liked these."
Your cheeks burned, the heat rushing back to your face all at once.
Logan chuckled, clearly pleased with himself. He pushed himself up, his body unfolding as he moved over you, one arm bracing beside your head, his other hand gripping your hip. He was still fully dressed, still perfectly in control, while you lay there completely undone beneath him.
You swallowed hard, your pulse still racing. "You’re—"
A smirk tugged at his lips. "Yeah?"
You huffed, turning your face away, but he caught your chin, gently tilting your gaze back to him.
"You okay?" His voice softened, rough edges smoothing just enough to make your heart squeeze.
You nodded, still catching your breath. Logan’s thumb traced along your jaw, his gaze lingering on your face for a long moment before he finally leaned down, pressing his lips to your forehead.
“Good,” he murmured against your skin.
You felt the heat of his breath, the scrape of his stubble, and for a moment, neither of you moved. The weight of him was solid, grounding, his presence steady and familiar.
Finally, Logan exhaled through his nose, shifting slightly, his hands settling around your waist. He pressed another kiss to your shoulder, then muttered, “Should get you cleaned up, huh?”
You made a small noise in response, still too boneless to move.
Logan smirked. "Yeah, figured."
With an ease that shouldn’t have been possible, he lifted you up, settling you against his chest. His hands skimmed down your legs, his fingers lingering at the straps of your heels before slowly undoing them, slipping them off one at a time.
You let out a quiet sigh as the last one slid from your foot, the ache in your calves finally easing. Logan chuckled, pressing a kiss against your temple.
"Don't get too comfortable, sweetheart," he murmured. "Ain't done takin' care of you yet."
And with that, he stood, carrying you effortlessly toward the bathroom.
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yeah... i might've gotten a bit carried away
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therayofsonshine · 2 days ago
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was in a&e, so no better time to do this than now! (edit: missed the entirety of this as i was logged out. FUCK. so… um here is day 17 to 24. the very late version.)
day 17: my camera roll in my dr is.. honestly a vibe. but i have the weirdest shit going on over there. it’s tame to begin with: photos of england n my family. n then it just goes to shit: pics of our empty house with boxes everywhere and carnage from moving in and getting accustomed to a new environment. and tbh i can’t be arsed to delete anything 😭 so i’ve just left it and pray i can find the photos i need in time.
i wish i had a way to organise all of my camera roll into eras of my life and categories regarding photos. but.. that’s definitely something to add to my script.
day 18: i’ve scripted in a spontaneous drinking night for the reality show. i’m somewhat subscribed to the whole “drunk words are sober thoughts” thing so it would be really interesting to see what people think of certain topics/people on the show after a few games haha. this hasn’t happened yet but i’m really looking forward to how that one pans out!
day 19: i have a few hobbies in my dr! some are a work in progress whilst others i am confident + comfortable getting on with. they include and are not limited to: thrifting (my original occupation in this dr was a fashion student, but i changed my mind as it just happens randomly and i fear i would lose all love for it if forced to create), music (ironic as my boyfriend is literally an idol), crochet/knitting, and drawing.
i enjoy making things and making myself and others feel good whilst doing them. i have knitted my family/friends quite a lot of clothing (i am LITERALLY keeping the bills paid and lights on and providing clothes on the back’s of my family like damn!). if i’m not working i’m doing one of these things. n enjoying every bit of it.
day 20: i’ve recently discovered - in fact - my main love language is NOT words of affirmation (tho it is still one of them), but quality time (which actually makes more sense to me). so any date that revolves around me spending time with another person is quite literally the most romantic thing ever. FUCK romance!!!!!
for example, recently in my CR two of my friends watched the entirety of the hobbit trilogy with me in one sitting, into the early hours of the morning. and i am STILL telling people about it because it meant the world to me. those films are long too! so! yea, something like that.
day 21: WORKING. i work too much in my cr n now i have to do it in my dr as well????? damn it’s almost like i signed up for this! but i guess that’s one of the downsides of having a family business: i actually have to help out and do the work. yikes. no i’m kidding (kinda), but working in a café is not for the weak.
also, not really a downside - as again, signed up for it - but watching people want and like yunho before i go out with him. (context: this is a dating reality show dr, so people are going to fancy him alongside me. but can i blame them?). it doesn’t make me uncomfortable or awkward tbh, just a little like… oh! oh 😔.. oh 😏😏😏. you get me.
day 22: i scripted i can cook. (….yea.) i just cannot. i can make beans on toast but that’s as chef-like i get in the kitchen, unfortunately. and obviously having to work in a baking environment + serving customers food that may potentially poison them if it doesn’t agree with them, i need to know how to cook.
that’s as good as it gets i’m afraid!
day 23: MY FAMILY ARE SUCH LOSERS LMFAO. we do those matching pyjamas on Christmas Eve. we also make gingerbread houses! which is very fun!!!!
day 24: the vibes of this dr!!! it’s technically a dr for me to be on a reality dating show so a lot of it revolves around being in love (am not complaining yo…)
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day 25 (FINALLY): i spend xmas with my family. my family always book the week off and we close the café for christmas because let’s be frank who tf is coming into our shop on christmas day????? nobody yo. we’re not even in korea anyways so the shop just sits dead - and collects dust - during that time of the month. it’s a fun game to place bets on the state of the building after we return - tho we do try to leave it spotless when we leave.
xmas is always chaotic with my family it’s so funny. someone always ends up drunk and singing - eventually roping the rest of the family into it (or most LMFAO).
𝟐𝟓 𝐝𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐅𝐓𝐌𝐀𝐒. ❆ ⋆⁺₊❅ .
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a series of questions for the days leading up to christmas for shifters!! Some of these questions are Christmas specific and others aren’t, feel free to answer what you want and how you want, ex. moodboards, short answers, longs answers. And if you’d like, you can reblog so it reaches more shifters. Merry Christmas and Happy Shifting :) post tags are #shiftmas #shiftmas2024 tagged: @arishifter
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⌗ 𝟏. christmas caroling ; What are a few songs that remind you of your dr? Why?
⌗ 𝟐. gingerbread houses ; What does your house look like in your dr? Who do you live with? What is your favorite aspect of your house?
⌗ 𝟑. eggnog ; What is some drama going on in your dr?
⌗ 𝟒. sledding ; What does a hang out with you friend group look like? Where do you go? Who is your friend group?
⌗ 𝟓. snowman ; What is your OOTD? (outfit of the day)
⌗ 𝟔. stockings ; What is your family like? What are your relationships with different members? Any extended family? Who is visiting for Christmas?
⌗ 𝟕. candy canes ; What gives you dr euphoria? (like gender euphoria but for your dr…)
⌗ 𝟖. mistletoe ; Who is your s/o? What is your dynamic and how do you spend time together? Are you two doing something special for the holiday?
⌗ 𝟗. snowflakes ; What are some headcannons you have about people in your dr?
⌗ 𝟏𝟎. icicles ; What is your occupation in your dr? Your coworkers? (Or if student, your classmates?) What is your favorite and least favorite aspect of your occupation?
⌗ 𝟏𝟏. tree skirt ; How did you find out about shifting? What was your first dr and what is your main dr now?
⌗ 𝟏𝟐. ornaments ; What are some objects you have in your dr that you don’t in your cr? Why do you have them in your dr?
⌗ 𝟏𝟑. sleigh bells ; Are there any priveleges you have in your dr that you don’t in your cr? What are they?
⌗ 𝟏𝟒. cookie cutters ; What are some smells that remind you of your dr? Why?
⌗ 𝟏𝟓. elf on the shelf ; who is your main wingman/women/person? What is your dynamic? What do you guys do when you hang out?
⌗ 𝟏𝟔. wrapping paper ; What is your favorite way to script? Why is it your favorite way?
⌗ 𝟏𝟕. gift tags ; What is your camera roll like in your dr? (photos or just describe it)
⌗ 𝟏𝟖. snowballs ; What is a silly scenario you are looking forward to in your dr?
⌗ 𝟏𝟗. mittens ; What are your hobbies in your dr? How do you usually spend your down time?
⌗ 𝟐𝟎. ice skates ; What is your ideal date in your dr? (friends or s/o)
⌗ 𝟐𝟏. coal ; What is something unpleasant you have/have to experience in your dr? Why are you not looking forward to it?
⌗ 𝟐𝟐. tinsel ; What is something fun or random you have scripted? (ex. Thundersnow is more common, you have a ring that allows you to read minds, you have good luck with thrifting, you’re good at gambling.)
⌗ 𝟐𝟑. fir tree ; What are some traditions you have in your dr but not your cr? Why?
⌗ 𝟐𝟒. hot cocoa ; put together a moodboard of your dr or you in your dr
⌗ 𝟐𝟓. christmas ; How are you spending your christmas? Who with? What might be some gifts you are giving and to who?
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divider credits.
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fawnhart · 1 day ago
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drew begs bambi to forgive him ! ˚ ᡣ𐭩. 𖥔 ๋࣭
They had just wrapped filming her final season on Outer Banks. The whole time, Bambi acted as if she wasn’t hurting inside and nailed every single take flawlessly. Drew, on the other hand, was a mess and everyone knew it.
He kept messing up his lines, forgetting his call times, and dozing off between takes. In a way, Bambi felt bad for him. But he had no right to her sympathy, at least not at the moment
Now, both back in New York, Drew for a photoshoot and Bambi back in her elementl she couldn’t help but look at him with disgust and anger.
How dare he show up?!
It was one of those nights where everything was happening all at once and nothing at all. Drew stood at Bambi’s townhome door, soaked from the rain, his hands trembling, his chest tight. His mullet was a mess, not giving a damn if paparazzi caught him. He just wanted her to listen. She stood there, arms crossed as her eyes burned with anger, hurt, maybe a little curiosity, but mostly just tired.
she had every right to be
“Please, Bambi. Please, let me in. I can’t” He cut himself off, his voice breaking just a little, the words too heavy in his chest. He couldn’t keep pretending to be fine. Not anymore.
She didn’t move, arms crossed, standing her ground. She was beautiful like that, even if her face was streaked with tears, even if her lip trembled slightly.
“You can’t just come in here after everything, Drew.” Her voice was quieter than he expected, but sharper. It made his heart twist “You think you can just say sorry and it all goes away!?”
“I’ve been a mess without you, baby. I’ve screwed everything up,” he said, his words coming out in a rush “I was… I was just scared. Scared of you and your reputation, of what people would say about us. i-” His voice cracked, and he quickly cleared his throat, trying to hold it together “I thought if I distanced myself, it would protect you.”
Bambi’s expression softened, just a little, but not enough for him to get comfortable. She was still holding that distance “You pushed me away because of what other people might think?” Her voice wavered just slightly on the word might. “And that’s supposed to be for my own good?”
He dropped his head, his eyes stinging “I’m so fucking sorry. I don’t know what I was thinking. I was..no, I am an idiot.
She didn’t say anything, but her gaze never wavered. After a long silence, she sighed, her breath shaky “And then there’s your friend” she said, almost too quietly for him to hear.
The words hit him like a punch in the stomach. He didn’t need to ask which friend she meant. That girl. The one who had spent more time telling Drew what a mess he was for being with her than actually being his “friend”. Drew had started to feel that insidious doubt creeping in, her words twisting around in his head like vines.
“She told you I wasn’t good enough, didn’t she?” Bambi asked, and there was a bitter edge to her voice.
“i-I didn’t believe her, baby,” Drew said quickly, his hands shaking again. He took a step forward, desperate “I never believed her. I-look, I shouldn’t have listened to her at all. I was so caught up in my own shit, and-”
“And what!? You let her tell you who I am!? Who we are!? But you were perfectly fine having sex with me?, right” she said feeling utterly and totally used
He swallowed hard, a heavy knot in his throat “I should’ve told her to back the fuck off. I should’ve told you sooner. I should’ve never let her put those thoughts in my mind. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”
The air in the apartment felt thick, too heavy to breathe. He finally dropped to his knees, his face flushed with the weight of it all “I love you, Bambi. Please... don’t shut me out. I need you. I can’t fix this without you.”
Her eyes flickered with pain as she stared down at him, her arms still crossed, but now her lips were pressed tightly together as she fought back more tears. She couldn’t let him see her break just yet. Not like this. Not when she was still trying to figure out whether or not she could believe him.
“You really hurt me, Drew. You have no idea how much.” Her voice cracked as she spoke, and she turned away, wiping at her eyes. She moved slowly, the silence between them stretching like a thin wire.
Drew stayed kneeling, helpless. “Please, Bambi. I’ll do anything. Just tell me what I need to do.”
She turned back to him, eyes red-rimmed but steady. “You have to prove it. You have to show me you’re not just talking. Words don’t mean anything anymore.” She paused, her gaze hardening. “And you need to cut her off. She’s clearly got it out for me, and for us, and you can’t keep her around if you want to make this right.”
He nodded immediately “I swear I will. I’ll cut her off. I’ll do anything. Just... please don’t leave me.” His voice was raw, the last of his pride crumbling.
Bambi stared at him for a long moment, and then she sighed “Fine,” she said quietly “But I’m not forgiving you tonight. I need to think about it.”
Drew’s heart sank, but he nodded, trying to be understanding, even if every fiber of him wanted to scream.
“Get up, you’re embarrassing me” He stood up slowly, and she led him into her townhome, but not without a sharp glance over her shoulder as she said, “And you’re sleeping outside tonight, With my cat.”
Drew blinked, startled. “What?”
“I’m serious. Outside. With Ms. Mocha. You can sleep on the balcony.” Her tone was final, but there was a faint smile tugging at the corner of her lips as she walked past him into the closet, grabbing a blanket and tossing it in his direction.
Drew was about to protest, but the look on her face stopped him. The soft, determined way she held herself now was a reminder of why he loved her in the first place, because she never made anything easy for him. She knew her worth, even if he had forgotten for a while.
He grabbed the blanket, muttering, “I’m an idiot.”
Her lips quirked up at that, just a little. “Yeah. You are. But you’re still my idiot.” She softened then, her voice growing quieter. “you have to prove you deserve to be with me. Because I can’t go back to being second place.”
Drew nodded, his chest tight. “I swear I will. I swear.” He hesitated then added “can I atleast sleep on the couch?” he said with a weak smile
Bambi rolled her eyes, but it was playful now, the tension easing just enough for her to offer him a tiny truce. “Fine. I haven’t burned your clothes yet, consider yourself lucky.” She said heading to her room to grab some of his pajamas he had left there several times
He laughed softly, grateful for the small weird victory. He knew it was far from over, but it felt like a step in the right direction.
“missed you Mocha” he whispered as he curled up on her soft pink couch, Ms. Mocha curled up next to him with an irritated meow, Drew stared at the night sky view from her townhome, wondering how he could have been so fucking stupid. But maybe, he had a chance to make it right.
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© 𝐅𝐀𝐖𝐍𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐓, 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟓
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vunblr · 2 days ago
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Toy Soldier (part 5)
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Bit by bit, torn apart. We never win, but the battle wages on for toy soldiers.
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader
Warnings: 18+ only. Angst. Hurt/Comfort. Fluff. Smut. Dark Content: Sexual Assault Wounds (Bucky). Depictions of Physical Wounds. Psychological Trauma. Canon-Typical Violence. Mentions and depictions of Non-Con (both characters as victims).
Word Count: 7.3k
Previous Chapter
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The next day, she messaged Sam, asking if he could stop by her house before the briefing. His reply came quickly, surprised but agreeable, suggesting a time two hours before the meeting. When the knock finally came, she took a deep breath, bracing herself for whatever reaction he might have.
She opened the door to his familiar, easy smile, but the knot in her stomach didn’t ease. “Hey,” he greeted casually, stepping inside when she gestured for him to come in. “This feels serious. What’s up?”
She led him to the couch, motioning for him to sit. Her palms were clammy, and her fingers twitched slightly as she sat across from him. “It is,” she admitted, “And... I need you to hear me out before you say anything.”
That wiped the smile from his face. Sam leaned forward and clasped his hands loosely between his knees. “Okay. I’m listening.”
She inhaled deeply, and then, she started. From her life before Hydra -her simple, ordinary life in the 60s- to the day everything changed. The kidnapping. The endless, suffocating years as a prisoner, a tool. Her voice faltered as she described the barest surface of what she’d endured and what she’d been forced to do regarding the Winter Soldier. She tried to keep the focus on herself, omitting the details that might betray Bucky’s privacy, but it was impossible to completely separate their pasts.
Sam listened without interrupting, his expression shifted with every new revelation: concern, disbelief, pity, before being replaced with something softer. Compassion.
When she finished, she let out a shuddering breath, slumping her shoulders. “I’m sorry I never told you anything about... this. For giving you my manufactured past. For lying to you about who I am.”
He shook his head immediately. “Don’t apologize for that. It’s your story, and it’s yours to share whenever you’re ready. Or not at all. I get why you didn’t say anything. Hell, I can even understand why the government kept it locked up.” His gaze softened, leaning back slightly. “But it doesn’t change a damn thing. I never doubted our friendship. Not for a second.”
Relief bloomed in her chest at his words. She managed a small smile, twisting her fingers nervously in her lap. “Thank you, Sammy”.
Sam nodded, and then his expression grew thoughtful. “So... that’s why Bucky knew you couldn’t heal yourself?”
“Yeah.” She gave a short, almost bitter laugh. “The information was never given by Hydra to him, but there were... moments. Times when he saw me.” Her eyes drifted downward. “And I guess he connected the dots. If I could heal myself, why would I walk around for days with a bruised lip, or limping?”
Sam exhaled slowly, his brow furrowing. “Damn.”
She nodded, tightening her hands together. “Yeah.”
“And... I didn’t tell you this either,” she hesitated, twisting her fingers in her lap. “Bucky and I... we’ve been seeing each other. After Poland.”
Sam’s brow quirked, a small, curious smile tugging at his lips. “Oh?”
She exhaled, searching for the right words. “Just... reconnecting. Or connecting. I don’t know exactly what to call it yet. Our relationship -if you can even call it that- back then didn’t precisely involve normal conversation over coffee.”
He leaned back slightly, crossing his arms. “So, the Winter Sulkier talks to you over coffee?”
That drew a chuckle from her lips, lightening the tension in the air. “Yeah. I mean, he’s more of a listener most of the time, but yeah, he talks.”
Sam’s smile softened as he observed her, but she dropped her gaze to her hands again, and her expression turned more serious. “Thing is... he was here yesterday when you called me about the mission. And when I mentioned Argentina and a large crew heading there...” She paused, tightening her fingers together. “He got all worked up. I think he intuits there’s something to do with them.”
Sam’s expression darkened, and his easy demeanor faded. He shook his head slowly, dropping his gaze to the floor. “He isn’t wrong.”
Her chest tightened at the confirmation, but she continued. “He left immediately after that. Told me to talk to you about... us.” She hesitated, then added, “And, that he’s coming.”
Sam let out a heavy sigh, rubbing a hand down his face. “Of course he did.”
“I tried to tell him it wasn’t his decision to make,” she said quickly, “But…”
“-there’s no stopping him,” Sam finished with a faint shake of his head, a flicker of exasperation in his tone. “Yeah, I know.”
----
Sam drove them to the briefing at the DHS Strategic Operations Center, a heavily-secured government facility that handled covert international assignments. The building loomed large, with its sleek gray façade and high-security checkpoints manned by armed guards.
To her surprise -or not-, when they entered the briefing room, Bucky was already there, leaning against the far wall with his arms crossed. He looked calm, but the tension in his posture told her otherwise.
Sam quirked a brow at him, gesturing vaguely toward the entrance. “How the hell did you get in here?”
Bucky just stared at him in response, with an unreadable expression.
“Seriously, man,” Sam pressed, muttering something under his breath, shaking his head as he took a seat. She, on the other hand, couldn’t help but smile faintly at him, though the knot of worry in her stomach hadn’t eased.
The room began to fill with agents and operatives, and a few heads turned toward Bucky, with flashing recognition across their faces. It was clear that having both the Winter Soldier and the Falcon in the operation was a major bonus for the mission and a point of fascination for everyone in the room.
She slid into a chair beside Sam, sneaking a glance at Bucky, who had claimed a spot near the corner of the table. He caught her eye briefly, and for a moment, something unspoken passed between them.
“Looks like the government’s thrilled to have their star players,” she murmured under her breath to Sam.
----
The room fell silent as the operation leader stood at the head of the table, pointing to a digital map of Ushuaia Province projected on the wall. “As suspected, there’s an active Hydra facility in the region. Thanks to intel provided by Argentina’s military forces, we’ve identified its exact location. It’s heavily fortified, with multiple levels of security and a significant number of personnel. Resistance is expected to be strong, and casualties are a possibility.”
The words hung heavy and foreboding between the crew.
“As we continue,” the leader said, turning toward her, “your role is crucial. Due to the expected resistance, we need you on the field, embedded with a group of agents. Your abilities may be needed in the heat of the fight. Even some casualties won’t be avoidable, your presence could make the difference between life and death for many of our operatives.”
Bucky’s body tensed immediately, snapping his sharp gaze to the leader. He didn’t wait to be addressed, didn’t wait for permission to speak. “No,” he said firmly, his voice cut through the room like a blade. “I don’t agree.”
The leader’s eyes narrowed slightly. “Excuse me?”
Bucky straightened from his spot, squaring his broad shoulders. “Sending her into a live combat zone? With Hydra? It’s a mistake. She doesn’t belong on the front lines, she belongs somewhere safe. She can work from a plane or a secure location if you need her. Putting her directly in danger is reckless.”
She could feel the weight of his words pressing against her like a physical force, but her focus was on the leader, not him.
“Barnes,” the leader started, “with all due respect, this isn’t your call-”
“No, but it’s common sense,” Bucky cut in, hardening his voice. “If things go south, she’s the one they’ll target first. Do you really think they wouldn’t recognize her? That they wouldn’t know what she can do and what she’s worth to them?”
Her heart clenched at the words, but she didn’t flinch. Instead, she stood, scraping her chair softly against the floor as she rose to her feet.
“Enough,” she said sharply, interrupting him.
Bucky’s jaw tightened, and his gaze snapped to her, but she didn’t look at him. Her eyes were locked on the operation leader, unwavering and resolute.
“I’m in,” she said firmly.
“You don’t-” Bucky’s voice carried a mix of frustration and concern, but she turned to him before he could say more.
“I said I’m in, Bucky,” she repeated, in a softer tone this time but no less determined. “This is my choice.”
The room was silent again, the tension thick in the air as the leader gave her a small nod. “Good. Then we’ll move forward as planned.”
Bucky’s hands flexed into fists at his sides, but he said nothing more. She could feel his eyes on her, the weight of his disapproval and concern, but she didn’t falter.
This was her fight too. And she wouldn’t let anyone -not even him- take that from her.
The operation leader continued detailing the roles while pointing to the screen. “Barnes, your job is to breach and clear one of the facility’s entrances. You’ll be working with a tactical unit to infiltrate and eliminate the immediate threats on the perimeter.”
Bucky crossed his arms, flexing a muscle in his jaw. “I’ll go with her team.”
The room collectively turned to look at him, as the team leader narrowed his eyes in displeasure. “That’s not your assignment.”
“Well, I’m making it mine,” Bucky said, sharp and unwavering.
Sam let out a low scoff, raising a brow at his partner. “You’re just great at following orders.”
Bucky shot him a sidelong glare but ignored the jab, turning back his attention to the leader. “Let’s be honest,” he said, his tone bordering on cocky. “I’m the best asset you’ve got going in there. If she’s on the field, it makes sense for me to stay close. She makes sure I keep going, and I’m the one who can get her out in one piece.”
The leader leaned forward slightly, clearly distressed by the audacity. His hands fell flat on the table. “You’re overestimating your authority here, Barnes. This isn’t a solo mission.”
“I’m not saying it is,” Bucky replied “But if something goes wrong, I’d rather she have me at her back than anyone else.”
Another agent, seated further down the table, cleared their throat. “With all due respect, Sergeant Barnes, you’re probably not the one who’d need her help. You’re a super soldier. You’ve got advanced healing, stamina, and the works. If she’s in the field, she’ll be more useful to the non-enhanced units who’ll be taking the brunt of the fight.”
Bucky opened his mouth to argue but stopped short. He knew she was right, as much as he hated to admit it. He didn’t need her assistance. He wanted her nearby for reasons that had nothing to do with logic and everything to do with the protectiveness that burned in his chest.
His jaw tightened again, but he gave a small, almost imperceptible nod, forcing himself to back down. “Fine,” he muttered, though the word sounded like it was dragged out of him.
The operation leader’s gaze lingered on Bucky for a moment longer before he turned back to the room. “Then it’s settled. Everyone knows their roles. We leave in three days. Dismissed.”
As chairs scraped and the room began to clear, Sam caught up to Bucky near the door. “So, what’s the plan now, guard dog? Gonna give her a tracking device or a leash?”
Bucky shot him a look that could kill. “Not now.”
Sam grinned, unbothered. “Just saying, man. You’re not as subtle as you think.”
Bucky ignored him, drifting his gaze to where she stood by the table, gathering her things. She glanced up, catching his eye, and offered a small, reassuring smile.
He sighed, running a hand through his hair. He might not be able to stay by her side during the mission, but one way or another, he’d make sure she came out of it safe. Even if it killed him.
----
They didn’t see each other again until they boarded the plane. She spotted him immediately, seated at the far side of the hold, inspecting one of his many weapons with mechanical precision.
Bucky was fully geared up, every inch of him screaming Winter Soldier in a way that made her chest tighten uncomfortably. His tactical suit, dark and imposing, seemed like it was made to swallow him whole, to erase every ounce of humanity she knew was there. Knives, pistols, ammo, -there were more weapons strapped to him than she thought possible-, and Sam, seated nearby, muttered under his breath as he caught sight of him.
“Jesus, Buck,” he quipped, leaning back in his seat with an incredulous look. “Where do you keep all that? Got a secret pocket dimension you haven’t told us about?”
Bucky didn’t answer. He didn’t even glance up, focused on the rifle in his hands as he loaded it with a meticulousness that bordered on obsession.
She hesitated before sitting down, diagonal to his, close enough to see the taut lines of his jaw and the cold set of his features. He was somewhere else entirely, locked inside his head in a way that made her stomach twist.
Her fingers tapped lightly on her knee as she debated. Eventually, she mustered the courage to try and break through the wall he had so obviously put up. “Bucky,” she started softly, testing the waters.
He didn’t look at her. “What?”
Her lips pressed into a thin line. “You okay?”
“Fine,” he said curtly and dismissive.
She tried again, leaning forward slightly, lacing her tone with a touch of warmth this time. “You’ve been quiet since the briefing. I just... wanted to check in.”
“Don’t worry about me,” he said flatly. He finally looked up, but it was brief, just a glance before he turned back to the rifle.
She bit the inside of her cheek, and the pang of melancholy deepened. He was shutting her out, retreating into himself in a way that felt impenetrable. She wanted to say something more, to push through the wall he’d built around himself, but every clipped answer was like a door slammed in her face.
Eventually, she leaned back in her seat, slumping her shoulders slightly. Sam, catching the shift in her demeanor, leaned over and nudged her gently. “You good?”
She gave him a tight smile, though it didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Yeah. Just... tired.”
Sam didn’t press further, but his gaze flicked between her and Bucky, knitting his brows together in thought.
The hours of the flight passed in uncomfortable silence. She stopped trying to talk to Bucky, resigning herself to the fact that he wasn’t in a place to let her in. Instead, she found herself leaning on Sam, who kept the mood light with his casual banter and stories, though she knew he could see the strain on her face.
----
After 22 long hours of flight, the group finally arrived at Ushuaia, skipping any rest stops and heading straight to the location marked on the map as the Hydra facility. The biting -7°C temperature hit them the moment they stepped off the plane, but no one said a word. Adrenaline and focus were locked firmly on the upcoming assault.
As the team deployed, spreading out to take their positions, she adjusted the straps of her gear, ready to follow her assigned group, when she felt a hand wrap around her forearm, halting her steps.
It was Bucky.
Before she could say a word, he gently tugged her closer, his steel-blue eyes piercing through the dim light of the icy morning. Without hesitation, he dipped his head, resting his forehead lightly against hers. The gesture was intimate in a way that caught her completely off guard.
“Stay safe, doll,” he murmured, barely audible over the wind. His other hand slid to her lower back, a solid and steadying touch that sent warmth spreading through her chest despite the freezing air. Her breath hitched, and for a moment, it felt like time had paused around them.
Before she could respond, he pulled back, slipping his hand from her back as he released her. The touch lingered like an imprint on her skin, a phantom sensation she couldn’t shake.
He gave her a small, firm nod, and then turned, walking away to take his position. She stood frozen for a moment, her heart racing and her thoughts spinning in a blur. She didn’t notice the tiny tracker he’d deftly pressed onto the back of her jacket, concealed in one of the seams.
She exhaled deeply, shaking her head as she regrouped with her team. It was only after they began their cautious advance toward the Hydra’s den that she realized she hadn’t said anything back.
----
Bucky's moves were methodical and relentless, bordering on terrifying. His rifle barked sharp bursts of gunfire as his entry key. The initial resistance barely had time to register what hit them before he had breached their defenses with precise and purposeful shots, clearing the way with deadly efficiency. Once inside, the rifle was slung across his back, and he transitioned to pistols, twin bursts of fire that cut through the dimly lit hallways.
When a close-range ambush came at them, he didn’t falter. A knife was in his hand before the first attacker could barely move, and the blade moved in a blur as he parried, slashed, and dropped him in seconds. His other hand went for another approaching assailant, and the dull thud of his fist meeting flesh sickly reverberated down the hallway. The third guy went down with a savage elbow strike to the jaw, that sent the man crumpling against the wall.
The facility was a maze, and he navigated it with an almost preternatural awareness, dispatching any Hydra remnants that dared to cross his path.
Behind him, his team could barely keep up. “Does he even need us?” one of them muttered under their breath, clutching their assault gun tightly as they followed, watching Bucky tear through Hydra’s defenses like a one-man wrecking crew. They focused on providing cover and securing the areas he left in his wake, though it felt almost redundant.
He wasn’t reckless, he was purposeful. Every move was efficient, calculated like a finely tuned machine operating at full capacity. And beneath that precision, was a driving force, a singular thought that fueled him: finish this, finish it fast, get to her.
He turned a corner into a wider room where a group of agents had set up a defensive line. Their gunfire erupted the moment they saw him, but he was already moving. His body twisted as he sprinted toward them, weaving through the barrage with inhuman speed. A flash grenade from his belt bought him the split second he needed to close the distance. When the deafening pop and blinding light cleared, he was in the middle of their formation.
One went down with a knife to the gut, another with a pistol shot to the temple. The third tried to grapple him, only to be met with a swift blow from his vibranium arm that sent him sprawling. Bucky didn’t stop. His fists drove into ribs and jaws, his knives carving through the last line of resistance like it was nothing. Blood splattered onto the cold floors, and the once-deafening room fell silent except for his steady breathing.
The radio on his team leader crackled. “Barnes, status?”
“Clear,” he grunted, wiping the blade of his knife on his sleeve and sheathing it in one fluid motion. His team moved in behind him, sweeping the room as they murmured amongst themselves about the inhuman force of his assault.
He barely heard them. His mind was already elsewhere. His heart was pounding, not from exertion, but from the worry that ate away at him. The sooner his end of the mission was done, the sooner he could ensure she was safe.
----
As Bucky cleared the last room in his assigned sector, he took a final sweep, ensuring no hidden threats remained. The bodies left in his wake weren’t his concern, only the safety of his team, and more importantly, her. So he turned around and started walking away.
He moved like a shadow through the corridors, silent and methodical, operating on pure instinct. The tracker he’d slipped into her clothes pulsed steadily on his HUD, leading him through the labyrinth of sterile hallways and flickering overhead lights. Hydra never changed, their bases were practically carbon copies, and he used that to his advantage, cutting through shortcuts only an old ghost like him would know.
Gunfire crackled in the distance, shouts echoing through the steel walls, but none of it mattered to him.
He picked up the pace as he neared her location, tightening his grip around the pistol in his flesh hand, his vibranium fingers twitching in anticipation. Then, finally, he reached her sector.
The sight before him sent a cold fury ripping through his chest.
The fight was still ongoing and it was clear her team was barely holding on. Some were down, some wounded, and the rest were outnumbered. But Bucky’s eyes only locked onto one thing: the asset trying to restrain her.
She was struggling. He could see the way her limbs lagged just a second too slow, the way her stance wavered ever so slightly, she was exhausted. She’d burned herself out healing the others, and now they were trying to take her.
The bastard restraining her was big, armored, and clearly enhanced. Bucky already knew the type, one of Hydra’s modern knockoff attempts at recreating him. The man had his arm locked around her middle, wrestling to subdue her, while his other hand reached for a syringe strapped to his vest.
Bucky didn’t think. He didn’t hesitate.
His pistol fired once. Clean, direct. The bullet punched through the asset’s wrist, making him snarl and drop the syringe before he could use it.
Before the man could react, Bucky was already on him.
The Winter Soldier resurfaced with brutal efficiency. He grabbed the man by the vest and threw him off her like a ragdoll, sending him crashing into a nearby crate. The asset barely had time to groan before Bucky was on him again, landing a punishing strike to the ribs, then another to the jaw.
The bastard recovered quickly, swinging at Bucky’s head, but he dodged with ease, catching the incoming arm and twisting sharply. The asset howled, but Bucky silenced him with a savage punch that sent him sprawling.
Not enough. Not nearly enough.
He didn’t stop until the man stopped moving.
When he finally turned, he found her staring at him, breathing hard. Her hair was disheveled, her face marked with sweat and dirt, but she was alive.
Still his.
High on adrenaline, Bucky turned toward the dantesque scene unfolding around him. Her team was struggling, pinned down by the remaining opposition, outnumbered and exhausted.
So he moved.
The first man barely had time to register his presence before Bucky’s knife found his ribs, twisting with brutal precision. The second one lunged at him, and Bucky let him, sidestepping at the last second and slamming his elbow into the man's throat, crushing his windpipe. They kept coming but the room was cleared in minutes. Efficient. Lethal. Over.
His feet carried him forward before his brain even fully registered it, his hands reaching for her the second he was close enough. He pulled her against him, wrapping his arms around her tightly, his chest rising and falling against hers as he tried to steady himself.
His face found the crook of her neck, and he inhaled deeply, calming himself with her scent. She was real, she was safe.
She was trembling, whether from exhaustion or leftover adrenaline, he didn’t know. Didn’t care. He just held her tighter, curling his fingers into the fabric of her tactical gear, pressing her against him like he could shield her from everything.
He didn’t speak. He just held on, waiting for his heart to stop hammering, for the instinct to fight, to kill, to protect, to settle into something quieter.
He didn’t let go. Not yet. Not for a long while.
----
She let him hold on, basking in his unrelenting grip. But as the minutes stretched, something felt wrong in her chest, a creeping worry she couldn’t shake.
“Bucky,” she breathed against his ear, trying to pull back just enough to see his face.
He didn’t answer.
Her hands skimmed over his back, searching for wounds, for anything out of place. “Bucky, are you hurt? Let me see you.”
Nothing. No response. If anything, his arms locked tighter around her.
She leaned back slightly, shifting her hands to his face, ready to insist -look at me, talk to me- but then she saw it.
The empty stare. The idle, blank eyes she knew too well.
Her stomach dropped.
Her fingers threaded into his hair, gentle but firm. She inhaled deeply before trying. “Soldat?”
A barely-there shudder ran through his body. His grip twitched, tightening before loosening just the slightest bit.
She swallowed hard. She knew exactly where he was, adrift in the space between past and present, somewhere dark, somewhere cold. She cupped his face,  sweeping her thumbs over the sharp lines of his cheekbones. “Listen, everything is fine now. We are safe, you did good. You can rest.”
Her breath hitched as his grip slipped down and tightened around her thighs, and the world tilted violently as he hoisted her over his shoulder like she weighed nothing.
“Soldat-” she started, but he moved with single-minded purpose, boots echoing heavily against the bloodstained floor as he strode down the corridor.
The others tried to move after them, with evident concern. “Stand down,” she called over her shoulder, her voice firmer than she felt. “Don’t- don’t interfere.” Because if they do…
They hesitated, but obeyed, exchanging wary glances as the two disappeared around a corner.
“Soldat,” she tried again. “Put me down. I’m fine. Where are we going?”
No answer. Not even a flicker of recognition. His grip remained firm, arms locked around her legs, his vibranium hand pressing against the small of her back to keep her steady.
The hallways blurred past in a dizzying, all-too-familiar pattern. He knew where he was going. Of course he did. Hydra never changed their layouts, never altered their twisted efficiency.
And then he stopped. A metal door loomed ahead, slightly ajar, the faded remnants of a red cross still painted on its surface.
The infirmary.
Before she could speak, he shoved the door open with his shoulder and stepped inside. She staggered slightly as he set her down “What are you-“
But he wasn’t listening. Not really. He pressed his back against the door, sliding down until he sat on the cold floor with one bent knee and the other stretched out. His head tilted back against the cold metal with a dull thud, and his eyes flicked shut for just a second before snapping open again. His chest rose and fell in deep, measured breaths. His gaze landed unfocused somewhere in the distance.
She took a cautious step forward, lowering her voice. “Soldat?”
His fingers twitched.
The only thing she could think to do was play along. Her pulse hammered in her throat, but she kept her expression carefully neutral. First, she pressed a hand to her comm, switching to Sam’s channel. Keeping a steady voice, she whispered, “Sammy, I’m fine. My side of the facility is clear, but there’s… a complication with Bucky. My teammates will fill you in. Just don’t come looking for us. Please. I need you to make them understand.”
There was a long pause, before Sam’s voice finally came through the crackle of static, lower, graver than usual. “…You sure about this?”
Her gaze flicked back to Soldat, watching the way his fists clenched and unclenched at his sides, coiled like a spring. She swallowed hard. “Yes. Let me handle it.”
Another pause. Then, a resigned sigh. “Alright. But if you need backup-”
“I’ll let you know.” She shut off the comm before he could argue, pushing the outside world aside.
----
She clasped her hands in front of her, standing straighter, adopting the crisp authority she’d seen Hydra’s handlers use a thousand times before.
“I need a mission report.”
His fingers twitched again. His gaze flickered -just slightly- but it stayed distant, unfocused, locked somewhere behind her rather than on her.
A long beat of silence.
Her stomach clenched.
She took another step closer. “Soldat,” she repeated, keeping her tone firm but even. “Mission report. Now.”
His jaw worked, and a slow inhale expanded his chest.
“…Facility neutralized.” The words came rough and automatic, like a reflex. His voice was lower than usual, mechanical, like the syllables were pulled from his throat against his will. “Threats eliminated.”
She swallowed. “And my status?”
His breath stuttered slightly. His fingers flexed, curling into loose fists before releasing.
“Secure,” he said after a pause.
She exhaled quietly, steadying herself.
Her mind raced for the next step. She couldn’t just order him out of this. She needed to guide him back. She took a slow breath, crouching down to his level, careful not to make any sudden movements. “Good,” she murmured. “So… mission’s over now, right?”
Another twitch. His throat bobbed as he swallowed.
She hesitated, then reached forward, brushing featherily his vibranium knuckles. No sudden moves. No pressure. “Remember what happens when a mission is over? You let me check on you and I get you all better.”
He hesitated. His brows knitted together as though sifting through fragmented, conflicting commands buried deep in his mind. But then, after a long, tense beat, he gave a single, curt nod.
A breath she hadn’t realized she was holding slipped from her lips.
“You did good,” she said again, keeping a reassuring voice. “Go sit on the stretcher and let me see you.”
He stood immediately at her command, a well-oiled machine running on deeply ingrained instinct. With precise, practiced movements, he removed his rifle, his sidearm, and every knife tucked into his gear. Each weapon clattered softly onto the nearby tray, in a quiet, chilling symphony of steel.
Then, without hesitation, he stripped away his tactical vest, shrugging out of it like armor no longer needed. His Henley followed, baring his torso under the harsh, sterile light of the infirmary. His skin was streaked with sweat and blood. The deep, ugly wounds carved into him were the only indication that he wasn’t invincible.
He sat on the stretcher with squared shoulders and rested his hands on his thighs as he stared ahead. Silent. Waiting.
Her breath hitched when she saw the extent of the damage. Two large-caliber bullet wounds, one grazing his ribs, the other embedded deeper near his shoulder. A deep stab wound on his side, red and angry. The blood had slowed to a sluggish trickle, but the damage was undeniable.
She inhaled heavily, steeling herself, knowing she was running on fumes. She had drained so much of herself in the fight, trying to keep others alive, trying to be useful. But she couldn't stop now. Not when he was in front of her, hurt because of her.
Her hands hovered over the worst wound, shaking slightly before she forced them to steady. Focus. Do what you have to.
But as she pressed her glowing fingers to his skin, and the warmth of her power seeped into his body, another weight settled over her. Guilt.
He came here because of her.
He got hurt because of her.
And worst of all… his mind was slipping, because of her. Regressing into something she wasn’t sure she could pull him back from. She choked on a sob, and her vision blurred as she fought to keep her hands steady, mending his torn flesh.
The sound made his jaw tick, and something shifted in his expression. Slowly, he turned his head to her, knitting his brows together as he took in the sight of her tear-streaked face. His gaze flickered toward the door -searching, assessing-before settling back on her.
The hesitation flickered in his usually unwavering demeanor. Then, with a slow movement, he lifted his flesh hand and cupped her cheek.
“Why?” he rasped, his voice was rough, uncertain.
That made her sob harder, but she didn’t stop mending him. She leaned into his palm, pressing her cheek against the warmth of his hand as she sniffled, trying to regain control of herself.
“S-sorry,” she managed, her voice unsteady.
“You are always sorry,” he countered, in a neutral, almost observational tone.
Something about the way he said it made her pause. It rang a bell. The Soldat never spoke to her before. Not when they dragged him into the med bay, not when she pleaded with him to respond in those stolen moments of quiet, not when she whispered apologies he couldn’t acknowledge.
But this wasn’t Bucky either, not completely. This was a fractured version of him, a Soldat pulled from the depths of his mind, not the same hollow shell she remembered. He was speaking to her, processing things in a way he never had before. How much of him was in there? How much did he understand?
“It seems so,” she conceded, in barely above a whisper, more to herself than to him.
He studied her, tilting his head slightly, the way he used to when something puzzled him. “You should stop before the handlers come in here,” he said, not harshly, but matter-of-factly, as though it was the most natural conclusion.
Her heart clenched. His mind was caught in the past, in a time when her presence at his side had always been followed by pain, by orders, by unseen eyes watching their every move.
She forced a small, steady breath, keeping her hands moving as she knitted his skin back together. “There are no… handlers here,” she said softly, keeping her tone careful, controlled.
His brow furrowed slightly, but he didn’t argue. His thumb brushed absently over her cheek, like he was still trying to place her, to make sense of the moment.
She swallowed hard. “Do you know where you are?”
He blinked, and his eyes flickered toward the corners of the room as if searching for cameras, for listening ears. His jaw clenched, and when he spoke, his voice was quieter, like he was telling her a secret.
“I know I was sent to retrieve you,” he admitted. “You are the one who fixes me. Always do.” A pause. “You shouldn’t be talking to me. I know what happens to you every time you talk."
Her throat closed, and suddenly, it felt impossible to breathe. A sharp twist of nausea coiled in her stomach, memories slamming with brutal force. Her hands trembled slightly where they pressed against his wound. “No one is going to come,” she whispered.
His brow twitched. His head tilted slightly, and his eyes scanned hers, as if searching for something, truth, deception, an explanation that made sense in the fractured landscape of his mind.
“They always do,” he said again, quieter.
She swallowed hard and lifted a trembling hand, resting it lightly against his jaw. His skin was warm beneath her fingertips. “Not this time, radnój,” she murmured.
His breath stilled.
His flesh hand, still cradling her cheek, stiffened slightly before his grip loosened as if he wasn’t sure whether to hold on or let go.
The endearment shocked him. That word had never been meant for him. He had heard it before but never directed it at him. His fingers flexed uncertainly against her cheek. She always had spoken to him before -soothing words in hushed tones, quiet reassurances when no one was listening- but never this.
His brow creased, and his gaze searched hers as though trying to make sense of it. “You don’t-” The words caught on his lips, and he shook his head slightly. “You shouldn’t.”
She exhaled shakily, brushing her thumb over his jaw in soft defiance. “I do.”
A flicker of hesitation crossed his features. Soldat did not hesitate. But something about her -about this- was pulling him somewhere he didn’t understand.
“…Why?” he finally rasped, in a quiet, rougher tone.
His eyes searched hers, as a storm of confusion and something else swirled in them. His hand still hovered near her face, as if caught between instinct and reason.
“Did I overstep?” she deflected softly.
His gaze dropped, and the furrow between his brows deepened. “No,” he mumbled after a long pause, almost contemplative. “I just don’t… understand.” His brows drew together further, and his expression was caught somewhere between confusion and something deeper, something close to longing, buried under years of conditioning.
She took a slow breath, before carefully asking, "Is it okay to hug you?"
She and Bucky hugged a lot, usually with him being the one to start the embrace. But this man in front of her was not entirely him, not yet. And she wasn’t sure if Soldat would welcome such physical contact.
He blinked at her, and the hand in his thigh tightened briefly before loosening again. His brow creased in thought, like he was trying to decipher a foreign language. Hugging. That wasn’t something that belonged in his world. Contact had always been a means to an end: restraint, punishment, control. Not this.
She waited, patient and open, making no move to force it. Just offering.
Finally, after a long beat of silence, he gave the smallest nod.
Carefully, she leaned in, moving slowly, telegraphing every motion as she wrapped her arms around him. He tensed at first, but she didn’t pull away. She just held on, warm and calm, resting her cheek lightly in the top of his head.
His breath shuddered out of him, and after another beat of hesitation, his metal arm came up around her. Not crushing, not desperate, just holding her.
It was different from Bucky’s embraces. Bucky clung, seeking comfort he didn’t know how to ask for. But Soldat? This was uncharted ground. He wasn’t seeking, he was discovering. Testing the weight of the contact. Trying to understand why something so simple could feel so foreign.
She squeezed him just a little, in silent reassurance. “See?” she murmured. “Safe.”
He didn’t answer, but he didn’t let go either.
For a long moment, they stayed like that, wrapped in silence. She felt his chest rise and fall in measured breaths, as if he was trying to calibrate the sensation of being held. His fingers twitched slightly where they rested against her back, flexing as if testing their own freedom to move.
She exhaled softly, rubbing slow, deliberate circles against his back, feeling the tension in his muscles, so much of it, always there, always braced for the next order. But no command came this time. No mission awaited.
“You can let go if you want,” she whispered, though she made no move to pull away. “But you don’t have to.”
His grip tightened, just barely. A silent answer.
Instead, he tilted his head slightly, just enough for his forehead to ghost against her temple. The breath he released was deep and measured, like he was recalibrating himself against her presence.
She closed her eyes. This was Bucky, somewhere underneath, even if his mind was still tangled in old wires. And if she had to be his tether back to himself, she would be.
“I’m here,” she murmured, not expecting a response.
But after a moment, barely audible, he rasped, “…I know.”
She leaned in just a fraction more, tilting her head so their foreheads pressed together, brushing her nose against his. A barely-there touch, light as a whisper. He was so still, caught somewhere between the past and the present, between instinct and something softer. His vibranium hand flexed at her waist. She whispered his name. Not Soldat, not a title, just his name. A soft reminder. His grip on her tightened, slightly curling his fingers into the fabric of her clothes. His breath became uneven and shallow. “I know,” he murmured again, in a rough, almost pained tone. He didn’t let go. And neither did she.
She pulled back just enough to meet his eyes, wide and uncertain. The flickering light overhead cast shadows over his face, deepening the exhaustion etched into his features.
“I need to keep taking care of those wounds, hm?” she murmured softly, gentle as the touch she brushed along his back.
“Later,” he rasped, slightly tightening his grip at her waist.
She sighed softly, ghosting her fingers over his temple, pushing back a stray strand of hair. “I know you’re in pain, just-“
“And you’re drained,” he cut her off, tightening his jaw. His voice dipped lower, rougher. “Always… drained. Always crying. Always good. Even if I don’t deserve it.”
There he was again, stuck in the past, tangled in guilt and old wounds that refused to close.
Her heart clenched, but she didn’t let go. Didn’t move away. Instead, she cupped his cheek, brushing her thumb just beneath his eye.
“You deserve kindness,” she said firmly. “You always have.”
He turned his face slightly into her palm, as if hiding from the weight of her words. “…I don’t believe that,” he admitted.
She swallowed the lump in her throat, tightening her fingers against his skin. “Then let me believe it for you.”
Slowly, cautiously, she leaned in.
His breath hitched and his fingers flexed against her back, but he didn’t move away. Didn’t stop her.
She hesitated just before closing the distance, stopping her lips a whisper away from his. A silent offering, not a demand. He could pull back. He could reject it.
But he didn’t.
His grip on her tightened ever so slightly, barely perceptible, but she felt it, the smallest tug, a subconscious need.
So she closed the gap.
The first touch of her lips against his was featherlight, hesitant. The kind of kiss given when neither person was sure if they were allowed to have it. When the past weighed too heavy, when the present was too fragile.
He stiffened at first, as if his body didn’t know what to do with the warmth, real warmth. The softness of her lips against his, the tentative press of her fingers against his cheek, all of it felt foreign, too delicate for someone like him. But then, something in him cracked. His fingers curled against the fabric at her back, then tightening his grip and for a second -just one second- he leaned into it.
Then a sharp inhale. A shudder. His grip twitched, his body went rigid again, and she felt it, felt the exact moment the weight of too much history, too much instinct, too much them came crashing down.
She pulled back immediately, searching his face. His eyes were wide, pupils blown, his breath shallow. His lips parted, as if trying to form words but finding none.
She gently stroke her thumb along his cheekbone. “It’s okay,” she whispered. “You’re okay.”
His throat bobbed, and his fingers ghosted at her waist, barely touching, like he wasn’t sure if he was allowed. His gaze flicked down, lingering on her lips for the briefest moment before darting back up to her eyes.
Then, barely above a whisper, rough and unsure-
“…Again?”
A request. A plea. A fractured man grasping at something good, something warm, something he never thought he could have.
She smiled softly, before leaning in once more, giving him exactly what he asked for.
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Next Chapter
Taglist: @sunshinedayz19 @star-maker-rain-dancer @tumdlrnewb84 @mgchaser @buckys-arm-and-rios-dagger @gotminho @kaitlin013106 @startorrent @idontknowhowtonormal @mattmurdock42 @hnnhbananananana @aeriss-at-heart45 @jainaeatsstars @airixaram @seventeen-x @jaxz21 @zizzlekwum @hi172826 @valckenaux @moth-maam56 @myllamatimemachine @unaxv @smiithys @cats-chaotic-mind @melsunshine @neuviloved @cjand10 @frombkjar @strvnger3ditz @nikkinss @alexandra-001 @lavanderbreeze @cats-chaotic-mind @sleep-tight1 @lasrehsif @delicatepersondinossaur @bodhisattva11 @isepod @mrsnikstan @impoeticbeauty @beewilko @chinggay85-blog
Dividers by @/strangergraphics
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valalice · 1 day ago
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જ⁀➴ FOR THE FAME. a violet modern musician au
punk rockstar!vi 𝑥 popstar!reader
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summary. the music industry—known for its raw creativity, dazzling performances, and turning anyone into an overnight sensation. but what comes with newfound success is being able to maintain a steady stream of traction around your name (whether it's good or bad, because all press is good press. right?), for some artists it comes naturally, becoming chart climbers release after release, while for others they struggle falling down the charts and becoming known as just a one hit wonder. now when two artists under the same label are both getting sly criticism from blogs commenting on their declines, their managers have no other choice but to curate a classic pr stunt to regain their public appeal again, while creating buzz around their respective upcoming projects. what could happen when the industry's rebel and sweetheart become the unexpected pair of the year?
warnings. fluff, angst, and eventual smut. modern au. fake dating. enemies to friends to lovers. slow burn. reader's stage name is angel, you guys can honestly change it if you'd so like since it's rarely used. no use of "y/n". musicians: powder, ekko, claggor, and caitlyn. choreographer!mel. producer!jayce. homophobia and talk of internalized homophobia & comphet. addiction: alcohol & substance abuse, as well as talk of rehab. inaccurate knowledge of the music industry. social media extras & extended scene cuts. please check each individual chapter for appropriate warnings!
a/n. i'm am beyond excited to finally share this series with you all! this series started as a one off idea, and, well it turned into this. i know some have expected this, i've been throwing out teasers (more will still come) for some time. and to be honest i should not even be posting this series right now, but i cannot contain it for much longer, i'm just eager to get it out for people to enjoy! and is it hypocritical for me to be posting a series with the amount of drafts and request in my inbox? perhaps! but i promise that i will try my best to dually post between the series and other works! i'm still working on a posting schedule, so be on the look out for polls!
biggest thank you to @topimpabunny for dealing with my rants constantly, and bouncing ideas back and forth off of each other. truly, everyone thank her, because without her this series wouldn't even exist! another big big thank you to @veramores my wife, my best friend, for putting up with me yapping her ear away for like over an over. but nonetheless she is also apart of this series for giving me different perspectives on things. lots of love to the both of you <3
main masterlist ⋆ vi masterlist ⋆ read it on ao3
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table of contents ◞ TRACKLIST
' 🅴 ' indicates smut
prelude ♪ popularity contest. ( releasing february 7th on all music platforms )
label mandated events. everyone dreads them, but social networking is a must; an art form managers have mastered and a sport to artists in order to thrive in the competitiveness that is the music industry. and it’s here where the two of you were closer than you had even thought.
track one ♪ sold your soul for . . . this? ( releasing february 14th on all music platforms )
with albums set to release during the summertime, meetings ensue to keep the artists on track. however, unpleasant news is shared that gives wake up calls when careers are on the line. oh, and a not-so-meet-cute happens between the bubbling popstar and spunky rocker.
track two ♪ the master plan.
uh, oh! looks like the track is still being produced!
extras ◞ DELUX EDITION
social media post
coming soon!
exposed ◞ BEHIND THE SCENES
discography ⋮ series playlist. reader's. vi's.
meet the artist ⋮ reader ꒱ vi ( tell all's coming soon! )
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WANT A FEATURE?
comment on this post (and this post only) to be added to the 'for the fame' taglist! (i'm no longer responding to individually to each person who asks to be on the taglist, but i do see the comments and you are added!)
🎥 taglist. @sawaagyapong @baylegend6 @hauntedbydreams @sevisrealwife @dameacia @tdawg2012 @usuck @foralltheprettygirls @aphrodyk3 @ar1anw3n @jupitism @into-f0lkl0re @minaridior @sinsyster @oceangalore @prwttiestbunny @amsxdoll @ur-ur-urmom
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midnite-c6 · 19 hours ago
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Please please please please, Kim Seo-wan smutty smut... Ever since I read your Seo-wan x Reader I couldn't help but fall in love with that man more than I already was, so... PLS. if it doesn't maik ya uncomfortable obvs (⁠。⁠•́⁠‿⁠•̀⁠。"). ((TAKE UR TIME!))
YAYAYSYXTDGEGSYT I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE WHO WANTED TO LET HIM INN BYE ugh i want him (respectfully) added squid game tags since most of you guys watched ddos cuz of roh jae won and i want other ppl to see his role here! <3
kim seo-wan nsfw headcanons <3 || warnings: 18+, cunnilingus, fingering, fluff
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∘⁠˚⁠˳⁠° first of all, his daily routine consists of studying, gaming, and being schizophrenic making him not have time for all those romantic, especially physical affection kinda stuff, so you have to convince and show him! it wouldn't be difficult, he's still a guy after all, let alone a guy who plays those "gooner" type of games, and to put it simply: he's a virgin.
when he starts dating you, he'd add a new lesson to his routine: porn. he's already failing his other exams, he doesn't wanna fail you!
no bias guys, but he is a touchy dude, and a kissy one at that. your lips are his revival potion, the taste of your lips is healing his whole being, same goes for your other set of lips, when he found out you make cute cute sounds while he eats you out and make out with your cunny? oh he has defeated that dragon. damn. "y...you like it here, right?" he'd take a small kitten lick on your clit, making a soft moan elicit your lips. his hands on both sides of your waist, holding onto you tightly as if you'd run away from him. "mhm.. there's good.. s'good." he's happy for your praise, lapping his tongue up and down faster, you could feel him mumble a mantra of "you're s'..yummy.." against you, you were so tasty, he loved it so much. he wouldn't even take off his small circle-framed glasses, being pushed all the way to the bridge of his nose. "ah... seo-wan..♡" you could feel the metal frame hit your twitching clit, it was a different kind of feeling.
when you guys are finally comfy, you both know study dates are cute n' all. he'd have his headset on, listening to music, a hand to flip the textbook's pages, and his other arm to be hooked around your waist, holding you securely. you'd be doing whatever too, you liked his company anyway. but whenever studies get stressful and hectic, he won't lose the chance to grope your soft tits, they're the best stress relievers after all. he's definitely a boob guy. "ah.. y/n. move closer, please? .. need ..easier.. access.." i fear he is very touchy, clingy, he doesn't want to let you go.
cosplays!! oh, when you guys save enough money, he absolutely loves to do cosplays with you! he's very grateful your character has little to no clothes, he'd savour your body everytime it's spread on his bed and would treat you like a princess for real. tell him he's super duper strong, it will make him cum in seconds. :< probably accidentally rips off your expensive cosplay too, makes you mad, obviously, but will fuck you as a consolation prize.
he's more of a giver than a receiver, he just wants you to be happy and pleased all the time! ...also makes you overstimulated every session. his fav part on himself is his hands, he knows how fond you are to them, foreplay always takes long because his fingers are stretching your poor hole for hours <3.
again, he barely has the time to do full-on sessions, but when he does, he's gonna make you a squirting mess. holding hands while fucking is sooo real <3.
"mmfh.. don't leave me, okay? stay.." he 'reminds' you, slowly pushing his dick back inside your hole, his thumb pressed firmly on your clit, how were you gonna leave him anyway? he was holding onto you like you'd escape! "i.. won't seo-wannnn..." "ahh... good girl... my healer..." he whispers, kissing you softly, his mind is definitely in another world right now, atleast you're in it. (⁠。⁠・⁠ω⁠・⁠。⁠)⁠ノ⁠♡
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someone requested seo-wan x patient!reader so I AM GONNA FO THAT NEXT HELL YEAH
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itwasntimethatdidit40 · 3 days ago
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Hey there!
This month felt endless, am I right? Can’t believe it’s finally over.
This is a list of all the fics I read in January, I started writing it at the beginning of the month so they are in chronological order based on when I read them.
There’s a lot of stories but I still feel like I haven’t read enough lol
I loved every single work on this list so I highly recommend for you to read them and give some love to authors! They’re unbelievably talented and bring so much joy to this fandom, someone even in my life but this is another story.
I put the link to the Masterlist for series, so you can see all the chapters, some of them are ongoing and some are finished.
Please mind the tags and warnings to make sure a story doesn’t trigger you and makes you uncomfortable, I’m not responsible for what you choose to read, only you are.
Happy reading!
❋ Consume - @sunshineispunk
Stepdad!Joel x reader , DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT
❋ Liquid Gold - @gasolinerainbowpuddles
Joel Miller x f pregnant!reader x Tommy Miller
You are super pregnant and currently miserable after a third trimester issue crops up. You don’t know how to fix it, and Joel is determined to make you comfortable again. Will he come up with the right solution or are you going to spend the last few weeks of your pregnancy in awful pain? (Lactat!on kink)
❋ The First Time - @fettuccin-e
Frankie Morales x afab!reader
Size kink
❋ Mouthful - @pedgito
Joel miller x reader
Joel finds the perfect way to keep you quiet while he showers you with compliments.
❋ Holiday Heat - @baronessvonglitter
Joel Miller x f!reader
Only one bed trope, grumpy x sunshine, age gap, strangers to lovers
Sharing a hotel room with a grumpy (and handsome) stranger while a storm makes travel inaccessible. What could possibly go wrong?
❋ The Warden - @arcanefox207
Joel Miller x f!reader - DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT
Your hike into the woods doesn’t go as planned when a depraved Game Warden catches you breaking the rules.
❋ Quicksand - @javier-pena
Pedro's unnamed character in Materialists x f!reader
You meet a stranger at a party
❋ Borrowed Time - @aurorawritestoescape
Joel Miller x f!reader
Joel and you are enjoying an ideal vacation together. Warm ocean, white sand, soft kisses, and hot sex make it feel like paradise. But as your time here is running out, the thoughts that you‘ve been trying to keep at bay start eating at your soul.
❋ After hours - @mssalo
Sub!Joel x Dom f!reader
❋ Wandering Hands - @gothcsz
Javier Peña x f!reader
Javi can't keep his hands off you during a dinner with some friends.
❋ Strangers - @joelmillerisapunk
Stripper!Javier Peña x f!reader
you meet a sexy stripper at your bestie's bachelorette party and he tries his absolute hardest to get your number
❋ Law of Attraction - @baronessvonglitter (Series Masterlist link)
Dave York x f!reader - Romcom AU
Dealing with emotions is difficult when you and Dave realize how you really feel about each other. When a night in turns sour, you seek help from an unexpected source.
❋ Easy - @slowdivinqs
Joel Miller x f!reader
waking Joel up in the best way possible.
❋ Bad blood - @aurorawritestoescape (Series Masterlist link)
you want your stepdad and your step uncle offers to help
step uncle Joel Miller x f!reader x stepdad Tommy Miller
❋ Never have I ever - @wannab-urs
Dieter Bravo x afab!reader
You and Dieter play never have I ever and it gets spicy.
❋ My paramour, my evermore - A Joel Miller Story - @schnarfer (Knights and Kings AU)
Joel Miller x f!reader
Joel Miller is the loss of your life
❋ Let's Go - @thundermartini DBF!Joel x f!reader
you decide to channel your inner party girl on this Friday night. But things won’t go as planned. You’ll get even more from this night than a dance in a club and free drinks from strangers. (Or, I just wanted a pretext to imagine bouncer!joel railing me in the back room of a club.
❋ Yes ma’am - @sizzlingcloudmentality
Dave York x dominatrix!reader
life goes sideways and Dave is close to snapping. he needs professional help. aka let himself be dominated and be at the receiving end for once. good thing he has your number.
❋ Untitled - @aurorawritestoescape
Joel’s twin x f!reader || 500 words
❋ Girl Dinner - @slimybeth69 Dead dove do not eat (Series Masterlist link)
Joel Miller x f!reader
After the civilized world you once knew came to an end-- the men that survived... well they just take, take, take. Growing tired of having things taken from you-- you have a hankerin' to take somethin' for yourself... and make him perfect.
❋ Foxglove Downs - @whocaresstillthelouvre (Series Masterlist link)
Marcus Acacius x f!reader x Lucius Verus
In the exclusive realm of elite show jumping, where wealth stretches as far as the polished estates, Marcus Acacius and Lucius Verus are locked in a fierce competition that reaches far beyond the arena.
❋ No strings to hold me down - @baronessvonglitter
fwb!Joel Miller x f!Reader
Enjoying the freedom of being friends with benefits with Joel Miller, a new emotion flares when you see him out with someone much younger.
❋ What’s a Tomdaya? - @604to647
Modern!Pero Tovar x fem!reader
Pero regrets getting into a group chat with your friends
❋ Prisoner - @almostempty
f!reader x Din Djarin
this time our fav bounty hunter is the bounty and you're on a mission to capture him and claim your reward
❋ Final part of the neighbor series - Masterlist - @gothcsz
Javier Peña x f!reader
❋ All the good girls go to hell - Masterlist - @aurorawritestoescape
Stepdad!Joel Miller x f!reader
you can't stop thinking about your stepdad so you do something risky to have a little more of him. But Joel is not the "little more" kind of guy.
❋ Close-up - @milla-frenchy
Joel Miller x f!reader
Joel receives a script that takes him back to the memories of your love story. He realizes that out of protective instinct after the break up, he has not been honest neither with his own feelings nor with you
❋ El cumpleañero - @gothcsz
Javier Peña x f!reader
It's Javier's birthday, so you show up to his party and things get fun.
❋ Reincarnated - @joelmillerisapunk
Joel Miller x f!reader
A late-night text from an unknown number stirs up memories you thought you’d buried. It’s been years since Joel walked out of your life, but now he’s back. Old wounds resurface, boundaries blur, and the question lingers: is this a second chance or just another heartbreak waiting to happen?
❋ Leather and Lace - @probablyreadinsmut
Javier Peña x f!reader
Javier Peña is back in Loredo after retiring from the DEA. He's horny and looking for something new. That's when he finds you.
❋(Un)faithful - @probablyreadinsmut
Rbf!Javier x Married!Reader
Your marriage is lackluster, your sex life even more so. When your best friend Javier finds out, lines are crossed and lives are changed forever.
❋ some thoughts on hbf (husband's best friend) joel @baronessvonglitter / Drabble
❋ BDSMaid - @mountainsandmayhem (Series Masterlist link)
After recently graduating from university, your best friend offers you a job cleaning luxury homes for clients you’ll never know. It’s only temporary and a good way to save money for when you go back to get your law degree. That’s what you’re promised at least. Easy. Simple. Mundane. That is, until one of your clients is home and everything that you felt was missing in your life starts to fall into place. This goes against the NDA you signed and you could get fired. Or worse, you could fall in love.
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uracutieraka · 2 days ago
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Bakugo Katsuki who finally gets a date with his support course crush!
find part one here!
*.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.*
Bakugo Katsuki started acting completely different after he met you. His once perfect (to his standards at least) reputation was now ruined. The reason? Midoriya's cute support course friend.
Ever since you waltzed over to him with your sweet smile, and oh so pretty eyes, he finds himself nearly bewitched by you. It was driving him absolutely insane!
What was even more insane though, was watching this all unfold from and outside perspective.
Denki found himself nearly throwing up anytime you were even brought up in front of his friend, not because he thought you were gross, in fact it was the opposite. He found how down bad Bakugo was for you down right disturbing.
The normally mean and arrogant man seemed to do a 180° personality change when you came around, or even got mentioned in passing.
Denki especially hated it when you had now found yourself a regular member of their little lunch table. It just meant 40 minutes of watching Bakugo mindlessly nod his head with a glazed over look in his eyes, every. time. you. spoke.
"Gross." Denki says aloud as he bites into his sandwich. Eyes squinting as he watches the two of you like a hawk.
Sero looks over at his electric friend with a knowing smirk.
"You are so jealous Kaminari."
"Am not!"
The ruckus on the other side of the booth has you and Bakugo breaking away from your vicious flirting to study the source of the commotion.
His friends are sitting across from you arguing back and forth as Kirishima continues eating as if all was normal.
"Is everything okay?"
The boys now look over at the sound of the worried voice to see you. You have a concerned look on your face as you dart your eyes back and forth between them.
Denki looks over at his friend to see what his reaction will be to the boys interrupting you and him. To his dismay, bakugo has that stupid dopey smile on his face as he watched your every move.
Ok so maybe Denki was slightly jealous, but like, who wouldn't be? You were pretty and obviously attentive, smart but not arrogant, and worst of all, you liked Bakugo of all people.
Maybe he wouldn't be so upset at the situation if you liked Kirishima or literally anyone but the brooding Blond. It's not that he didn't want his friend to be happy, it's just that he didn't want him to get a girlfriend before he could.
So yeah maybe he was a bit jealous, but it wasn't that crazy.
Sero is quick to tell you everything is fine and to go back to what you were doing and you're quick to flash him a smile and nod of acknowledgment before turning back to the boy you were originally sat over here for.
You watch from the corners of your eyes as his friends go back to arguing but this time they're whisper yelling at each-other. You yet again lean slightly past Bakugo to see the red head sat behind him.
Kirishima only takes his eyes up from his tray of food when he hears his name being said. He looks up with a mouth full of food at the sound of your voice in his ears.
He takes a moment to hurriedly chew his food and swallow before responding.
"So, I was thinking, what if we just added some horns to your head gear instead of you always having to style your hair?"
Bakugo watched you interact with his classmates and feels himself pout a bit at the lack of attention.
You quickly glance at him through your peripheral vision and can see his bottom lip poking out as his eyebrows are furrowed together.
You decide to leans ever so slightly closer to the side of him so your knees are no longer the only parts of you touching.
He flushes and you feel him take a deep breath once your hip and leg is completely flush with his.
You now use your hand on his upper arm to support yourself as you look at Kirishima.
You and Kirishima share a few ideas back and forth with each other about the schematics of his hero costume.
You only end it when you see Bakugo roll his eyes.
You're quick to check your watch and stand up to excuse yourself.
Bakugo feels himself grow disappointed at the idea, a sad frown crossing his face to prove it.
You shoot him that intoxicating smile and ask him if he'd like to walk you to class.
"It's just awfully far and the walk is so boring by myself."
Bakugo yet again giggles at the invite and cleans up his lunch. He take the tray from your hands and you silently laugh at the way he puffs out his chest when you thank him and call him a gentleman.
Once he properly disposes of the trays you grab his wrist and quickly make your exit from the crowded area. He allows himself to be dragged off by you with a wide smile and soft eyes, chuckle bubbling out of him at your eagerness to leave.
If you told Bakugo a month ago that he'd be acting like one of those corny shojou manga guys he probably would've tried to fight you, but here he is now. Eyes never leaving the back of you as you lead him through the vast halls of UA.
After a few minutes of walking you slow down and drop his wrist, coming instead to stand at his side. He's kind of sad at the loss of contact with you but its quickly dissipated when you lean into him and nudge him slightly with your shoulder.
He looks down at you with a smile on his face and you give him the same expression as you two continue dow the halls towards your classroom.
Before the two of you turn down the hallways to your class, you stop him and lean your back on the wall.
He gives you a suspicious look and you tuck you hair behind your ear before talking.
"I don't want my teacher to see us yet.," a dry laugh comes from you before you decide it's best if you maybe actually looked at him while taking. He swears he can feel his heart stop (ifykyk) when you look back at him with a blush on your face and big doe eyes.
"I just wanted to say that I think you're super cute and wanted to know if you were maybe free tonight?"
He can feel his chest tighten at your words and he inhales at the sudden pit of anxiety in his abdomen.
He was free tonight, as he was most nights anyways.
"Yeah, are you?" He cringes internally at the dumb question, obviously you were. You wouldn't be asking him if you were busy. He feels a sense of relief when your siren like giggle swims around in head, ringing in his ears.
"Actually, I'm pretty busy tonight. I'm hanging out with this guy later then have some work to do on his friends costumes." You're tone is flat and he takes you seriously.
You watch as heartbreak over takes his face.
You playfully scoff and swat his chest.
"I'm talking about you Katsuki!" Another heavenly laugh graces his ears and he almost cries tears of joy from the sound alone.
"Oh." He says, heat creeping up his neck and ears as he awkwardly rubs the back of his neck.
"Pick me up at my dorm at 7:30?"
Normally, if you were anyone else, he would shut them down with s 'no' and the fact he goes to bed at 8 p.m. sharp every night. Though he quickly hears a desperate 'yes' tumble out his mouth before he can say anything else.
"Perfect!" You say, standing on your tippy toes to lean up and give him a soft peck on his cheek, something you had been doing since the day you met him. Though today you wore lipstick, something you normally skipped due to the inconvenience of it.
The dark red color stains his skin and you giggle before turning and walking off to class. The bell chimes and you turn around to holler at him.
"You have 10 minutes before you're supposed to be on the training course by the way Kacchan!" a mischievous smile tugs its way on your face as you wink and blow him a kiss before disappearing into your classroom.
He watches you with a fascinated look before he fully registers your words.
'Shit.' He thinks before bolting off to his class.
*.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.*
"You're late Bakugo." Aizawa dead pans as he walks up to the rest of his class on the platform.
He rolls his eyes and goes to respond before he's cut off again.
"Hey, what's on your face?" Midoriya asks, pointing to his cheek.
A few other students crowd him to get a look at the mysterious red mark.
"Is that a lipstick stain! What were you and that support course girl doing?!" Mineta pipes up.
Bakugo goes to hit him but is stopped when Mina goes to wipe it off.
He shoots himself up into the air and away from all of them.
They all watch in shock at his quick reflexes.
"Don't touch me idiot!"
Mina rolls her eyes and finally Denki chimes in.
"Bakugo, dude, get a grip it's just makeup."
Him and Denki ended up fighting so bad that he has to call you with the other boy to explain that he'll be there at 8 to pick you up instead, due to the fact him and Denki had to help Aizawa grade papers and clean the dorm showers as punishment for the disruption in class.
You giggle when he finally does come around to get you later that night. He has his hands shoved into his pockets and a nervous look on his face that seems to subside when you come out the front door and yet again leave a small kiss to the side of his face. He swears that you must have secret powers because of the way he gets so flustered anytime you even just breathe in his direction.
He hadn't heard the end of it in weeks, his friends constantly making fun of him for his rapid change in behavior. He didn't care though, which he even found weird himself, though he would never admit that to anyone.
He admires your cleaned up appearance, though he found it cute when you had your hair thrown up messily and grease stains on your face from whatever project you were currently working on in class.
"So, Katsuki," The sound of his actual name causes his ears to perk up and another woozy smile to sit on his face. "There's something that I want to show you."
You reach out and place your hand gently on his shoulder and run it down his arm, fingers lazily intertwining with his. You study how he reacts to your touch. You would be lying if you said you didn't throughly enjoy watching the notoriously angry man fold underneath the slightest bit of attention from you.
Though, you also can't help how it seems like your brain just turns off when you talk to him, a ditzy side of you that you didn't even know existed seeps out of you. It's like you can't help yourself. The desire to see that lovesick grin cover his face is all consuming.
You watch as he eventually gives you a few slow nods, showing you his approval to seeing whatever it is you want to show him. His eyes never leave where your hand is connected with his.
He thinks that this is probably the most amount of affection he's ever shown or accepted for anything.
You two walk in silence as you lead him to the school building, only when you scan a card to get in does he stand firm in his place with a weary look on his face. You turn back with a small frown at his solid stance.
"What's wrong?"
"Why are we at the school?"
You let go of him and turn around with and eyeball and a sigh, he knows it's just you poking fun at him due to the way the corners of your lips twitch up a bit as you speak.
"I don't know if you know this but support course students have 24 hour access to the school."
He in fact did not know this. You watch as his face contorts in confusion so you explain why as you rescan your ID card and open the door for him.
"Well for starters, our teacher is always here. He practically lives in the work room." He watches as a small snort leaves your body at the idea of your teacher living at school. "And it's also hard to stop us from working on our projects outside of class. The principle decided it was best to give us full access after a students dorm almost caught on fire when he plugged in his power saw." You continue to mindlessly ramble about how dumb he was for even attempting to do something like that in a small dorm, and how it's frustrating to have to walk all the way here in the middle of the night just to tinker around with small gadgets you could work on in bed.
He doesn't really hear anything you're saying though as his eyes are focused on the way your lips move and eyes seem to glimmer in the florescent lighting of the school halls.
He now fully takes in the way your hair is neatly styled and laid over your shoulders, and the way you have makeup on. He feels a since of pride at the idea of you getting all dolled up just for him to see. Though he quickly feels his knees buckle when you suddenly stop and push yourself up to him and wrap your arms around his neck before giving him a quick hug.
When you pull away you turn your head in an attempt to shy away from his gaze before you start talking to him.
He watches as you mess with the hem of your awfully short summer dress.
His face flushes at the way he can't tear his eyes off where the hem of the dress sways around your thighs.
You finally stop your gentle swaying and take a deep breath.
It's only when the flowy material stops moving completely that he looks back at you, he has to take in a harsh breath at how you look.
Sure you had looked at him head on before, and sometimes you had even bit your lips and blinked up at him! But this? This was something else. You had a wavering smile on your face as your cheeks were now full blown red. For once you were the overly flustered one.
"So uhm, Katsuki, I've been working on this for a couple weeks, and uhm, I'm really nervous to show you," You give him and awkward close eyed smile as you wipe your hands on the sides of your dress, because of this you miss the way he physically swoons at how adorable you look right now. "and it's not like its super amazing or anything! So don't make fun of me, okay?"
"No promises." A cheeky grin now hung on his face, it's the most confident you've seen him act around you, but like always it's cut short by you laughing and rejoining your hands to keep pulling him to your classroom.
You open the door and cringe at how squeaky it is. You turn back and put your finger up to your lip, signaling for him to be quiet.
"Mr. Majima?" Your voice chirps and echos through the metal work shop.
Bakugo wonders who you're calling out for.
He looks around the space, eyeing all the different things in wonder. He's shocked he's never been down here before. He looks back when he hears a loud crashing noise and sees someone pop around the corner.
"Oh! Y/n! Hi! I see you brought your, what'dya call him? Oh that's right! Your friend boy." A teasing tone is laced in the young teachers tone as you loudly groan and flick a lose nail up at the metal gear on his head.
"Bakugo Katsuki!," The teacher he now knows is Power Loader makes his way over to the blond. He watches as the man walks around him and inspects him a bit. Mumbling under his breath. He now turns back to you. "Interesting."
Bakugo feels like a bug getting crushed under someones foot at the choice of words.
"Whatever, Higari. Why don't you go tell my dad about how you nearly blew me up this morning with your stupid new invention." An eye roll and scoff has the older man backing off. Mumbling under his breath about how you were a spoiled brat.
Bakugo watches as he quickly leaves from the way you two had just entered.
"So you know him personally?" His voice holds a slight tremble at the new idea of how completely alone you two were.
You dryly chuckle and begin digging around, what he assumes, is your work station.
"Yeah, him and my dad have been friends since like forever ago. He's actually the one who convinced me to come here to UA. My top pick was a sister school in America."
Bakugo takes in the new information and stores it in his brain under a big fat file with your name on it.
"Wow," he shoves his hands back deep in his pockets. "America? That's far." He wants to slam his face into the wall for being so awkward.
You let out a frustrated huff before turning back to him with a laugh.
"Yeah it is!," you pout your lip out and tap your chin for a moment, lost in thought. "That means I wouldn't have met you! I guess staying has some perks." You send him a small smile before your more focused and frustrated scowl causes your brows to furrow close together, turning back to searching for whatever you had been looking for to begin with.
His eyes scan over the papers lazily tacked and stuck to your wall.
Sketches of Kirishima's costume are laid at the top of all papers. He steps forward to get a better look as you continue throwing drawers open and rummaging through them.
He slides the papers over and now realizes you had sketches of most of his friends costumes, with notes about what you could take away and add. He smiles softly before his eyes catch on a paper tucked underneath all your other ones. He sneakily glances at you through the corners of his eyes to make sure you're still preoccupied. His hand quickly shoves the paper to the side and double checks you didn't hear.
When he's 100% positive you're still busy he allows himself to fully look down. He feels his eyes get wide as he's greeted with the image.
Heat rushes up in his face as his eyes scan over it. Your name is scrawled all over it, but that's not what has him all giddy inside. His last name is written so prettily next to it. He thought his last name was so simple and boring but seeing it like this. In your handwriting? He's convinced it's the most beautiful name ever written, ever.
You stand up quickly and he jumps away from the desk, like he had gotten caught doing something he wasn't supposed to be doing.
Your eyes quickly fall onto where he was just standing looking down at, and widen. Heat shooting all over your body in embarrassment.
You jump over and shove papers around to cover it up.
You're apologizing to him frantically, but he doesn't care. He's looking at you like you just hung the stars up in the sky. The idea of you sitting there and doodling that over and over again yet again bring a cocky since of pride over him.
He takes the moment of clarity to show his true self a bit.
"So? Y/n Bakugo, huh?" He sees you deflate in on yourself and he suddenly feels bad for teasing you. He stutters in his head before deciding to say something else.
"It, uhm, it's a good fit." He was definitely going to make Kirishima punch him in the face later.
He watches as you now tilt your head and give him a confused stare.
"Our names...together..."
Oh my god why is he so nervous?
He watches as you bring your hands up to cover your mouth as you stifle a laugh. After a moment of fighting it you finally let it out. He watching with curious eyes until you stop and look at him, now putting your hands on your hips and standing up straighter.
"This is so awkward." The remnants of a chuckle slowly die down after you're done talking.
He feels slightly relieved at the fact you think so too, and that you also were nervous.
Bakugo hadn't spoked much since you met him, which always perplexed you for a few reasons.
He was known for being a loud and obnoxious student.
He was extremely talkative over text.
And lastly, he just overall seemed like the type to like hearing himself talk.
You hummed and motion for him to follow you. As you're walking you begin talking again.
"Ok, so like I said, you can't make fun of me for this, it's not my best work but I can always tinker with it later."
He's so busy looking around that he doesn't see you stop, causing himself to bump into you slightly.
He lets a sorry out under his breath as he goes to stand you up straight.
You tell him its okay before telling him to close his eyes.
"Why?" You can tell he's unsure about this but he reluctantly does it anyways when you tell him he'll see in a moment.
You walk around and place your hands on his shoulders guiding him forward a few feet. He feels cold when you let go of him.
He listens as you rummage around for a moment, he pokes his eye open but you're quick to run over and put your hands over them.
"Hey! No peaking!" You slightly uncover his eyes by sliding your fingers open. He has them screwed shut now.
You pull away from him and continue setting up.
"Okay!" You chirp out after a moment. He opens his eyes hesitantly.
He looks around for a moment before his eyes land on a pile of fabric neatly folded on a table.
"Well, aren't you gonna look at it?" You use your arms to motion between him and the present.
He walk towards it, slowly and unsure. You sigh and step forward, extending your hand out to him. He takes it with no hesitation. You guide him to stand over what he now notices as the base for his costume.
He gives you wide eyes.
"Is this..." His voice trails off as he brings his fingers to run over the soft material.
"Yep! A completely new type of fabric that's never been invented before!"
He was looking between you and the clothes in awe and shock. Did you really go out of your way to do this for him?
You clear your throat and begin to tell him about the process.
"So basically it's completely flame resistant while simultaneously feeling like 100% cotton. It also traps the sweat on your skin in the arm area, since that's how your quirk functions."
He had mentioned a brief complaint about the material of his costume to you in passing while you two were texting after his training one day.
He hated the feel of the current flame proof material that the support company had provided for him. It was stiff and itchy. But he couldn't wear his regular cotton shirts due to the fact they burned right up when he used his quirk.
"Oh and also.." You reach behind you and pull out a box, it's wrapped in cute pink wrapping paper with unicorns on it. He chuckles at the girly design as he grabs It out of your extended hands.
"Sorry, it was the only kind I had on hand." You shrug slightly and he laughs quietly and nods 'no'
"It's cute, very you."
You blush at the idea of him perceiving you enough to think something was 'very you'.
He stares at it for a moment.
"Open it." You whisper and he briefly flickers his eyes up at you. You have a soft smile on your face but your eyes are bright and excited.
He's gentle opening it. Using a quick finger to slide under the tape and carefully pull the paper off. You think it's cute the way he's so delicate and coordinated. He slides the top of the box off and can feel a familiar lump in the back of his throat, he's quick to swallow it down and look back up at you.
"Did you seriously make this? By hand? With your own brain?" You laugh at his boyish excitement.
You teasingly tap your temple and spout off a witty remark.
"All me baby. 100% the real thing too."
He looks back down in the box. They don't look like anything exciting or crazy but they were in fact the opposite.
To anyone else they would look like regular earplugs, but to you and him they were the invention that could potentially save his hearing in the long run.
"They tune out loud explosions, and any smaller ones. There's a small bracelet like band in the long sleeve I made you that can detect the size and estimated impact of an explosion by the temperature of heat that radiates on your body therefore calculating important information that then gets sent to the earphones to effectively muffle the sounds of the blasts."
You're so beautiful when you talk smart.
His eyes widen as he realizes he said that out loud and not in his head. For the nth time tonight alone he feels his face flush in embarrassment.
You stop your rambling as you turn to look at him.
"What?" Your voice is sweet and a teasing smile plays at your mouth.
He decides that if there was anytime to stand his ground it was now, but as he goes to talk the words seem to suddenly be stolen straight out of his mouth. You had taken his moment of weakness to close the distance between the two of you. Your hands wrapping around both of his biceps, giving them a slight squeeze as you push your face up into his.
"You think i'm beautiful?" Your voice is in a low whisper as you look at him with hooded eyes.
He stutters over his words at the proximity.
"Y-yeah," he take a deep breath. "of course I do."
You let out a quiet titter and lean in. Pressing a quick and chaste kiss to his mouth.
You pull back quickly though, because the doors reopen.
You both look across the large room to see a few of your classmates with your teacher.
"Aha! So you are with Bakugo Katsuki!" An accusatory finger points at you as your friend yells across the room at you.
Bakugo looks at you and you give him a nervous shrug.
"I told her that I wasn't seeing you tonight," you drop your voice low and lean over with a hand covering your mouth. "She doesn't like you because of what you said at the sports festival that one time."
He internally kicks himself for being such a douchebag back then.
"Whatever!," You shout back, making your way towards the man that was hidden behind your three friends. "Higari! You seriously went and snitched on me?" He watches as you stomp towards your dads friend with an annoyed look.
The man is quick to shuffle even closer behind the small wall of your friends, a sign of fear.
Bakugo chuckles as he looks back down to the box in his hands, then over to the clothes on the table. He now realized he had a new life goal, one that was far more important than becoming the number one hero. Bakugo Katsuki was going to marry you one day.
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thedarkestrivernymph · 1 day ago
Note
I would love any yandere clan leader fluff tbh, maybe one where someone from a clan at a party disrespects reader and he comforts her after defending her? Thanks!
Soft Yandere! Clan Leader x Wife! Reader
note: it kind of follows the theme of reader being overly insecure/doubting him
warnings: harassment, insecure! reader,
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Everything was loud.
The piano and violin, the hushed whispers surronding you like constant white noise, the whiskey lingering in the air like cheap perfume. You felt your head spin and buzz—bile on the back of your tongue while you clutched your glass filled with the unidentifiable magenta swirling inside of it.
You shouldn't be here. Just were not cut-out for this; for the weight that your husband's last name bore, pushing you down until you could do nothing but slouch.
And then a strange cold limp patted you on your shoulder. Right, you were next to your husband's cousin—what was his name again?
“Relax, I’m sure he's gonna be right back.”
But as he laughed, tipsy as he was, you were certain that his hand shouldn’t feel like a heavy paw of a fox tackling down a lamp to feast on—it probably should’ve comforted you along with his words, reassure you and ease the tension between your shoulder blades.
“Pretty shy, ain't you?” he quipped and all you could do was smile awkwardly.
He was nice-looking, younger than you, probably with no fear of anything; especially not physical contact. It probably didn't mean much to him, but to you the pads of his fingers brushing over your naked shoulder felt violating, as if he placed them there specifically to watch the discomfort spawn on your face. As if he prided himself with being socially more comptent than you.
“Such a pretty face, but you don't talk much, do ya? C’mon talk, it's just me, we’re practically family now.” his breath stung, made your eyes tear up from the potent concentration of alcohol.
You hadn’t even meant to get roped up in this conversation, not at all. Passing by, searching for your husband in the crowd of unfamiliar clan-members and different clans; men dressed in their finest suits or cultural attires, with women adored in extravagant dresses and bold colours—you had stumbled upon the one familiar face of his distant cousin and now his arm draped over your shoulder like shackles keeping you in place.
“Got really lucky with ya—didn’t he? Lucky Bastard.” he laughed and you further shrunk and shriveled into yourself. “Got to be the next clan leader, got the title, the fame, the power, always got the prettier women—”
“That's enough.” a voice cut through the stifling air like a whip; sharp and poised like the gaze of his owner with his sudden appearance —draped in matching midnight blue silk, dressed worthy of the head of a clan as large as his was.
He was angered, you could tell that much—the piercing look in his eyes spoke for itself; as deep as the ocean, a storm wracking in his soul, with waves building up until they even swallowed you.
So you looked away, ashamed.
“I said that's enough.” this time he ripped his cousin's dirty paw off of your shoulder. His jaw was clenched and suddenly you felt suffocated by the intensity of it all—you hadn't meant for this. What if now he would blame you? Thought you were comfortable with being close to other men. He was so sweet till now, but what if he was appalled now, disgusted, what if he—
“Are you alright, love?” he grounded you, as he always did, holding you like fragile porcelain, peering down at you with stern but not unkind eyes.
“I-I am fine.” you stammered, overwhelmed by his gentle tone and softer touch—it made your head spin with confusion. Just why was he always so kind to you? Even now? Even after everything he saw.
“Love, you don't look fine to me.” he whispered, came close enough so that his breath brushed the shell of your ear and the warmth of it travel down to your painfully fast beating heart. “No, I really am—”
“She said she's fine. What? Tryna make me seem like the bad guy when you left your woman alone—” he didn't get any more words out before his collar tightened, dangerously until air was just but a luxury.
Yet you didn't even see him choking, nor did you hear whatever it was that your betrothed threatened him with, shielding your line of sight with his broad back, towering over the other guy as if he didn't want you to watch.
However he, no matter how much he tried concealing the conversation occuring between them—with hushed whispers similar to that of a scolding father—you could see raw terror in his cousin's eyes after your husband let him go. The man’s eyes were as wide as saucers and they may have met yours for just a fraction—yet you were sure of what you saw. Even more so as he scurried away like a mouse.
“Come. Let's get you out of here.” he grabbed you by your arm, firmly with strength that you knew would bruise if he was as angry with you as he was with his cousin. So he wasn't angry with you? Somehow, knowing this only unsettled you further.
He whisked you away—somewhere much more private and intimate; into a nearby empty room. Staring down at you, he stood still as a statue after closing the door, allowing silence to hug the both of you in a stifling embrace.
“I am sorry—” you broke through the silence, shattering the illusion of calmness.
“Sorry?” he furrowed his brows, bewilderment taking over his features and you swore his eyes watered. In a way, he only looked more frustrated, the sharpness of his features morphing to something animalistic.
“Is sorry not enough?” you flinched, squinting, the moon once more had chosen you to illuminate with its beauty. Yet, you were nothing worth of it—not when he stood in front of you, more righteous and more deserving than you ever had been.
It seemed he was at a loss for words, staring at you as if you were alien to him.
“I truly feel remorseful—” you were about to kneel, lower yourself, but before your knees even had the chance to hit the ground he held you in his arms, shaking you with all his might.
“Stop, my love, please stop. One more word of yours and my heart will rip.” he was frantic, desperate. This wasn't the usual head-strong confident leader, the man with the voice of chiffon—this was him, raw and vulnerable.
“How can you—have I failed this much?” his voice was like tides of the sea; unrestrained yet eerily calm. “Have I neglected you? Have I not shown you how much I love you?” his touch become more frantic, hands burying themselves into the fabric of your dress.
“I failed you, my love. I am so ashamed of myself.” now he was the one kneeling in front of you. The man who's presence alone was enough to demand order and submission, who reigned over his clan firmly yet fairly, who was respected by everyone around you—at your feet, staring up at you as if you were his goddess and he a peasant.
Stunned you could only stare as wetness glistened over his cheeks, strange softness taking ahold of his features.
“I—” he pressed a kiss to your ankle. “I will prove myself to you once again. I will love you so much, you won't ever have the opportunity to doubt. I will love you enough for the both of us. So much, that you won't ever take the blame for a bastard again. I will love you so much, that you will stop thinking that you're anything but a minx that captured me and continues to do so.” he kissed your knee.
“Do you even know how much I struggle to let you out of my arms whenever we hug? I can't bear the thought of someone else claiming that you're theirs. When I know that you're my soulmate since the day our eyes met. I am yours in body and mind and I want you to finally see that.” his voice deep and soulful cracked, fingers clutching you like a lifeline.
“My love, I will do better. I promised once to prove myself to you, and I promise twice now. Even if it takes my whole life, I will get rid of everything that hurts you. Anyone that hurts you. And that includes all that garbage in that pretty head of yours. I will do better teaching you, love.” he kissed you over your beating heart.
“I am yours.”
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joelmillerisapunk · 1 day ago
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MILLLLAAAAAA I have not known peace since reading this
First of all, the tension. The history. The forbidden desire just simmering under the surface, waiting to explode. Every single moment had me gripping my phone like it owed me money.
The fact that they had all this unresolved emotion and then bam—thrown into the most intimate scene imaginable??
This was SO intense, so raw, so emotional—and the way it all came back to them in the end??? Like, she wrote the script for him. She was always going to find her way back to him.
I am never recovering from this. EVER I am crying in the club, hiding in the bathroom, sobbing into my pillow. okay favorite parts timeeeee - and this is my live reaction so excuse every emotional rollercoaster I hit here....
-> WAHHHHHH FJSDKJSDKLJF already killing me goddamnit He closed it and took a moment before rereading the first page, with the name left blank. It could only be you. That was the only explanation for getting a script without the name of the author on it. And there was no way the scene he had just read, so familiar, so intimate, could be coincidental. Or could be written by anyone else. He grabbed his phone and sent a message to his agent, unable to contain his annoyance.that’s fucked up, Will*Will calling* -> OKAYY I SEE HOW IT IS YOU WANT ME TO CRY ALREADY HUH? “It’s… damn, Will, it’s our story, ok? Or a part of it, I don't know. Anyway I can’t play this. Can’t play me.”
-> WHAAAA I CANT DO THIS I CANT BUT I WILL IM SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP He didn’t know how Joel used to hold you firmly against the mattress, hands on your hips, lapping at your cunt to make you come again. Because he always wanted more, always wanted to give you more. He didn’t know that pushing his cock in you was the sweetest, most intense sensation he’d ever felt. Even now, years later, he never felt something like that again. Will didn't know any of that, had no idea how intense it had been. Because the only thing Joel told him was “you don’t bring her up. Ever.” -> she is so relatable omfg I would be doing the same You knew what he looked like, you watched all his movies. In need of his voice, his smile, his gestures, his laugh. In need of him. But seeing him for real- not through a screen but in the same room, not some character but Joel, the man you loved more than anyone else, the man you would still call “the love of your life” in your thoughts -, was breathtaking, almost surreal.  -> SOBBING EXCUSE ME SIR? WTF YOU DOING SHAKING HER OFF LIKE THAT NO SIR NO SIR So you approached him, without overthinking it, but as soon as he saw you he gave you a subtle but firm shake of his head. The message was crystal clear - he didn’t want to talk to you, didn’t even want you around. It stopped your hesitant steps in their tracks, and the shy smile you had the courage to build instantly disappeared, and your gaze fell to the floor. Trying to control your breathing, to fight back the tears you felt welling up.
-> my good goddddd im dying over here i am not okay sos help me He shook his head to think about something else and to resist the urge to take the script out of the drawer. Instead, he took a sleeping pill and went to bed.
->idk Milla, i think you write the most beautiful things and you really wanna make my heart fall out of my ribcage. The writing was pure and vivid and as he was reading your point of view he felt like his ribcage was suddenly too small to contain his heartbeats.
-> ooooof THIS IS BUILDING UP OMG OMG OMG SMDFKSDA “Who do you have in mind for the female lead?” he asked finally. “Well… me,” you answered, without lowering your gaze that time.
-> stab me it might hurt less than this In tears in your car, your boxes in the back, eyes fixed on the rearview mirror where Joel’s silhouette was getting smaller and smaller. Until you could no longer discern his clenched fists, his stone face. Until he was only a small dot, until he wasn't in your life anymore.
THE ENTIRE INTIMATE SCENE HOLY SMOKES IM DIZZYYYY
-> I have no thoughts just thots my brain empty but this is delicious “I can feel you clench on my fingers, you’re gonna be a good girl and come again for me?” he asked, before swirling his tongue over your clit again. “Thought about it so often,”
AND THE END AHHH IM SOBBING
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8k7 | Joel Miller x fem reader | ao3 | masterlist Summary: Joel receives a script that takes him back to the memories of your love story. He realizes that out of protective instinct after the break up, he has not been honest neither with his own feelings nor with you Warnings: 18+ mdni. ex lovers reunited, angst, mostly Joel pov, Joel can act cold out of defence mechanism, he has trouble accepting his own feelings, pining, slow burn, pet names (sweetheart, baby), semi public sex, just the tip, soft!joel, oral (f), piv, creampie. Pic for mood only, reader has no specific physical descriptions. 
a/n:  this is written for @jolapeno 's dear-uary challenge (prompt here) thank you for this challenge Jo, and it was such a cool prompt 😍😍😍 Thank you @aurorawritestoescape for beta-ing and for reading this one soooo many times 🥹😘💕 @/saradika-graphics for the dividers 🙏
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I sent you a script, tell me what you think tell me more just read it, trust me
The informal messages between Joel and his agent, Will, were usual. They had known each other for a long time, they were friends, and Will had always found him perfect roles. 
So as always, Joel trusted him- even though the first page of the script, delivered to him by a courier, was not completely filled, making him wonder why. 
In the evening he put his cup on the coffee table, and lay down on the sofa, a soft light lamp behind his head. With his back leaning against the cushions, shirt, jeans, bare feet. Always the same ritual, always the same setup, when he was about to read a new script.
He started reading it, taking a sip of coffee from time to time, until his heart leapt in his chest as he got to a particular scene. 
He closed it and took a moment before rereading the first page, with the name left blank. 
It could only be you. 
That was the only explanation for getting a script without the name of the author on it. And there was no way the scene he had just read, so familiar, so intimate, could be coincidental. Or could be written by anyone else. He grabbed his phone and sent a message to his agent, unable to contain his annoyance.
that’s fucked up, Will
*Will calling*
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“Yeah,” he grumbled as he picked up, without even trying to hide his feelings, then he got up to pace the room.
“Look, I know what you’re thinking, Joel. But she’s a great writer and actress, you know it. We’ve been looking for a good drama movie for a long time. This one’s perfect.”
“It’s… damn, Will, it’s our story, ok? Or a part of it, I don't know. Anyway I can’t play this. Can’t play me.”
“Joel, listen to me and think about it. No one would know. And it can be therapeutic.”
“Thera… jesus, you gotta be fucking kidding me.”
Joel sighed as he hung up and threw his phone on the couch. 
Why the fuck would Will do something so stupid and inconsiderate, giving him a script from you? 
At the beginning of his career, his agent sent him one project for a movie in which you were expected to play too. Joel confessed that you two had been together, and added “you don’t bring her up. Ever,” to end the conversation. So Will never did. 
Until today.
He sat back down on the sofa, resting his forehead on his fist, resisting the urge to throw the cup of coffee across the room. He was surprised by his own reaction, his nervousness. His anger. Barely able to control his emotions, he felt so weak, like his heart was about to tear in two again, swallowing him whole. He was affected, years later, as if it happened yesterday.
So, sure, a long time ago he asked Will not to talk about you anymore. But they might have been  friends, his agent might have known about you, but he didn’t know the details. Didn’t know how profoundly the break up had hurt Joel, how much you had gotten under his skin, back then.
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And in Will's defense, it wasn't like you never saw each other again, at parties or ceremonies, under Will’s gaze who thought that it wasn't that bad, after all. It was years after your separation, now having the job that both of you dreamed about, talked about, sweaty young adults in a messy bed where he had just made you come.
Will wasn't aware that it was actually that bad. 
Because he didn’t know the way Joel looked at you, when you were together. He didn't know how sweet and caring Joel was with you. He didn’t know how much he loved wrapping his arms around you, and having you curl up against him. 
He didn’t know how Joel used to hold you firmly against the mattress, hands on your hips, lapping at your cunt to make you come again. Because he always wanted more, always wanted to give you more.
He didn’t know that pushing his cock in you was the sweetest, most intense sensation he’d ever felt. Even now, years later, he never felt something like that again.
Will didn't know any of that, had no idea how intense it had been. Because the only thing Joel told him was “you don’t bring her up. Ever.”
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The first time you saw each other again, was in a place full of actors, agents, writers and directors.
You couldn't believe he was here, a few steps away from you. Of course, you knew you'd cross paths one day, but suddenly he was closer to you than he had been in years and you felt your heart racing. He was even more handsome than he was back then, if it was even possible. You knew what he looked like, you watched all his movies. In need of his voice, his smile, his gestures, his laugh. In need of him. 
But seeing him for real- not through a screen but in the same room, not some character but Joel, the man you loved more than anyone else, the man you would still call “the love of your life” in your thoughts -, was breathtaking, almost surreal. 
So you approached him, without overthinking it, but as soon as he saw you he gave you a subtle but firm shake of his head. The message was crystal clear - he didn’t want to talk to you, didn’t even want you around. 
It stopped your hesitant steps in their tracks, and the shy smile you had the courage to build instantly disappeared, and your gaze fell to the floor. Trying to control your breathing, to fight back the tears you felt welling up. 
If you had looked up right away, you would have seen guilt sweep through his eyes. But when you finally raised your head, seconds later, he was on the other side of the room. The only thing you could see was his back, which he undoubtedly presented to you deliberately, as if his glare hadn’t been enough to make a point.
All evening, you struggled to keep conversations going, to concentrate, to think of anything other than his dark stare, furrowed brows, and the way he shook his head at you without any hesitation. For years, you had been wondering what he had thought of you, after those years. You just got the most brutal answer to that question. 
The second time, a journalist had done some research and discovered that you attended the same university, graduated the same year. He took the opportunity to bring the subject as Joel was walking by. He probably hadn't seen you amongst all those people, because you were sure he would have gone the other way, otherwise. You didn’t have much choice than to kiss, feigning a friendly closeness that had never existed between you. You had been lovers, then strangers. No in-between. 
His scent, so familiar, invaded your nostrils. He always wore the same perfume, the one you had given him for a birthday. It surprised you but you didn't have much time to think about it, as he ended the hug quickly.
Joel's eyes were shifty when you looked at him, a fake smile plastered on his lips. Which could probably seem real for people who didn't know him, but not for you. Not even years later. You answered the journalist's questions as best as you could, until Joel leaned towards to give you a hug that was as neutral as his eyes on you, cutting off the questions. Then he walked away, leaving you facing the journalist who was delighted with the exclusive material and oblivious to the unspoken scene that had happened in front of him.
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Joel thought back to those two evenings, after he’d hung up on Will and before he’d put the script away in a drawer. He needed to regain control of his emotions, and to do that he couldn't continue reading your words, at least for now.
He went to the kitchen for a fresh cup of coffee, and despite him trying, his mind wandered to lazy mornings where he would get up to make two coffees and then come back to the bedroom. He’d put them on the nightstand, before cuddling up to your warm body under the sheets, hearing you moan gently. Sometimes you would fall asleep in one of his shirts, and he loved smelling his scent on you, as if you were marked by him, somehow. It always made him feral, possessive. He didn’t know he had that side in him, until you.
You'd always grab his hand to kiss the tip of his fingers, before sliding them along your folds, feeling his cock harden against your ass and your pussy starting to drool. He would make you come with his digits, his lips against your ear, caged in his arms, then he'd slide his cock between your thighs and your soaked folds, just in time for your last spasms to squeeze his tip. Sometimes he would keep fucking you like that, lying behind you, and sometimes he would roll you on your back, taking his place between your thighs. Until he’d come, grunting, growling, his hair disheveled, and you often fall back asleep, his cock softening inside you, the cups of coffee cold on the nightstand.
He shook his head to think about something else and to resist the urge to take the script out of the drawer. Instead, he took a sleeping pill and went to bed.
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The next morning he woke up groggy. He put on a t-shirt and sweatpants, poured himself a cup of coffee, and put aside his good resolutions. He didn’t need the script to think about you, anyway. Time never healed his wounds, he never forgot you or the pain he had felt when you’d left. His thoughts were always hurtful, possessive and raw.
Even years after the break up he couldn’t help but think about you when his wrist fucked his shaft. Even sometimes when he was in a relationship. He hated himself for that but couldn’t help it. He missed your cunt, your hands, everything. But he couldn’t accept the idea that he was simply missing you. 
He always thought that your bodies were made for each other, and you always breathed the same words. He knew you meant it, his cock buried in you, his eyes fixed on yours rolling to the back of your head and his ears filled with your moans, barely able to tell his name.  
Until it was over. 
He knew it could happen, you always told him that you'd have to leave for California one day in hope to live your dream, that you couldn’t do it in Texas. But he brushed it off, not wanting to believe it, not wanting to think about it. He hid it in a corner of his mind, until he had no other choice but to face reality. Until it hit him. That day, he realized that he wouldn’t get to wrap his arms around you for the rest of his life.
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He lay down on the couch and started to read. And the more he read the script, the more he realized that you wrote only the moments that had really happened. 
The story, background, was slightly different, probably so that no one could ever make a connection to the two of you. But the moments were real, and it made him dizzy.
You wrote that dance in your small apartment, first for the both of you, that you rented after graduation. You worked as a waitress and Joel was a barista, and you two went to as many castings in Austin as you could, dreaming every day about being actors.
That night you put on some music and danced. He kissed your hand and looked at you. He felt warm. He loved you so much that his heart was aching. He made you spin and you laughed, and it was like a spring breeze in the apartment, filling his lungs with fresh air. When you stopped twirling you brushed his hair and then kissed him. 
The writing was pure and vivid and as he was reading your point of view he felt like his ribcage was suddenly too small to contain his heartbeats.
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Over the next two days, he took the script out of the drawer regularly. Slowly touching the paper that already bore the marks of repeated handling, him  lying on his couch, taking his time before opening it. 
He read it all, and the sweetness, the sensitivity with which you described your moments moved him profoundly. The person he had loved, cherished, cradled in his arms, wrote that. 
All the intimacy, the love and care you both felt for each other were there. For several years he made everything to forget the good moments, to focus only on the ending to feed his bitterness, but the fact was that there had been so many beautiful moments. And he could read them, feel them again. Couldn’t deny them anymore.
Your words were so familiar, so true to your love story, that his anger slowly gave some place to something else: nostalgia. Finally allowing himself to miss you and what you two had. He was still wondering why you had written the script and sent it to him, but now he was ready to learn the answer. And he wanted to look you in the eye when he’d ask you this question. But he wasn't sure how he’d behave, when you met. Didn't know if bitterness or nostalgia would fill his heart.
So after two days of silence, Joel picked up his phone and sent Will a message.
Ok, set up a meeting
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Because of your busy schedules you could meet only in two weeks. The delay was driving him crazy. 
He made a copy of the script, his copy, which he filled with annotations, dates. Underlining moments or words erased from his mind, out of grief, anger or self-protection.
He got hard several times, while reading some scenes. And sometimes anger would come back to creep into his thoughts, whispering to him that you never should have sent it to him, when your separation had been so painful for him. 
And Will was not the only one Joel said “you don’t…. ever.”
To you, it’d been “If you leave… you don't call me. Ever.”
That morning, as he got used to doing several times a day, he grabbed his copy of the script. He had handled it so much that the sheets were already damaged, some pages peppered with annotations. 
As he was reading, he remembered how you had loved to run your fingers over his jeans when you were watching a movie on your little couch. Playing with him, your hand going higher and higher, just to hear his breathing slow down, just to hear him murmur a needy and low “sweetheart, what are you doing?”, making you smile widely. Knowing that he would manhandle you two seconds later to be under him, pulling your panties to the side and pushing his thick length into you. He remembered the feeling of your breasts against his chest, how you whimpered in his neck while he was fucking you hard and deep. 
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He was nervous the morning of the meeting. He took a shower, hoping to get rid of the fatigue and headache from the lack of sleep the night before. He put on a shirt and jeans and grabbed his car keys, put on some music when he started to drive, trying to change his mind, but it didn’t work, he was still anxious. He parked near the building. Once inside he found the meeting room and knocked on the door. He heard you say “come in” and took a deep breath before twisting the handle.
You were alone, sitting in a chair, and he quickly pushed aside the thought of how pretty you were. Joel immediately noticed your hands, pressed together nervously, before you stood up to greet him. He stopped when you walked towards him and your smile faded like that time.
“Wait,” he said, his hand raised in front of him, as he was trying to control his emotions. “I just… Why did you send it to me?” he added without any preamble, his tone harsher than he intended. 
“Oh… ok. Straight to the point, huh?” you said, sitting back down, and removing an imaginary crease on your sleeve, eyes lowered to the desk.
“I never…” you started to say, before stopping and taking a breath. “I think I needed to write our story down.” 
Joel’s sigh stopped you. You tried to keep a low and calm tone, not to show your anxiety. You knew that facing him wouldn't be easy. He had given you a glimpse of his coldness after the situation with that journalist.
“Joel, please, listen to me.” 
You looked at him, and yet you had no idea how his name, escaping your lips, tore his heart apart. He never thought he’d hear it again, and the familiar intonation made him shiver.
“I honestly think it would make a great movie,” you said. “And you must think so too, since you’re here.”
“I don’t know why I’m here, honestly. Except that I want to know why.”
“Would you have preferred to discover it once the movie was out, your role played by someone else?”
His gaze on you, dark and possessive, made you freeze.
“No, I really wouldn’t have appreciated our story, my life, played by someone else, Jesus,” he growled.
He put his hands on his hips, a stance you’d seen him do dozens of times before, searching for words, and then he sat in a chair, pinching the place just above his nose with two fingers. Trying to stop the headache that was threatening to come again. It had started off badly, and he knew it was his fault. He was too stubborn, too cold.
“Who do you have in mind for the female lead?” he asked finally.
“Well… me,” you answered, without lowering your gaze that time.
“You?” 
A part of him, that he thought was gone the day you had left, woke up with a groan. He couldn't imagine the movie being made, you playing... well, you, and him being played by another man. It was unthinkable and made his jealousy and possessiveness stir painfully in his chest.
Unlike you, he hadn't watched your movies. He tried though, when he saw your face on a movie poster for the first time. He went to the cinema, but he walked out of the theater the moment that actor leaned toward you to kiss you. He couldn't stand to see someone kiss you, when he couldn't do it anymore.
“I’m the best person to play this character, aren’t I?” you said softly, interrupting his thoughts. “Just like you’re the best one to play the male lead. Look, I know you’ve been rumored for a role like this for years. I know you’re not opposed to it. So why not?”
“Because it’s not about playing a role here,” he sighed. “It’s playing in front of a camera, things we said, did, years ago. Intimate things that belong to us.”
“I changed some things, no one has to know it’s autobiographical,” you started to say, before he quickly cut you off. 
“I know it is. And so do you.” He walked over to the window to stare at the buildings in front of him. “When you leave someone, you don’t do that. It’s unhealthy,” he said, almost softly. Resigned. He turned to you before adding, “Why stir up something that died years ago?”
He didn't expect to face the sadness that clouded your face, and once again guilt seized him. You were sad, upset, and despite the bitterness he’d been feeling for years, he didn’t want to hurt you.
“Joel… I didn’t leave because I didn’t love you anymore,” you answered, standing up and walking towards him. You stopped a few steps away to respect his boundaries, before you'd see his body stiff. “I left because I had to follow my dream, and it wasn’t working in Texas. And you wanted to stay in Austin, to take care of Tommy. We ended it because a long-distance relationship would have been too painful, because I didn’t want us to be unhappy, barely seeing each other, not being able to feel each other often enough. So I left. And I told you all that. You knew it, you knew why.”
You took a breath, after formulating what was oppressing your heart, waiting for him to answer.
“Playing with feelings is dangerous,” he said in a low voice.
“This isn’t a game, Joel. I'm not playing. I’m sure it would make a great movie. And maybe we need to express all that, even years later.”
“Do you remember what I told you that day? The last day?”
“Of course, I do. You told me not to call you. You told me that if we had to meet again… then it would happen. Well, it's happening, Joel.”
He looked at you, confused, and headed towards the door, brushing past you lightly as he passed. 
Just before leaving, without looking at you, he said in a low voice, “my agent will give you my answer in a few days.” 
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Once the door closed behind Joel, you remembered the day you left. 
In tears in your car, your boxes in the back, eyes fixed on the rearview mirror where Joel’s silhouette was getting smaller and smaller. Until you could no longer discern his clenched fists, his stone face. Until he was only a small dot, until he wasn't in your life anymore.
At that moment you were wondering if you had made a mistake. You kept wondering for years. To be honest, you still weren’t sure you made the right choice that day. You followed your dream and succeeded, but it cost you the love of your life.
You didn't know what to think about the meeting. It could have been worse, he could have left after two minutes of being there, you knew it. You could have said more, too, but you didn't want Joel to withdraw more into himself. And for sure, you couldn't have told him that you always thought of him when you were in someone’s else’s arms. That you tried not to let jealousy invade you when you thought of his personal life, knowing that you had no right to be. You gave up on that when you had left.
You knew what he thought, how he reacted. Now he needed time to process everything, and you just had to wait for his agent to contact you. You couldn't do more.
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Joel got to his car in a blur. He realized where he was only sitting behind the wheel, too many emotions swirling in his head. Years without seeing you and it had gone by at the speed of light. He blamed himself for being cold, blamed himself for not being cold enough, and he was even more lost than before he saw you. He started to drive, the feeling of having mishandled things weighing more and more on his shoulders.
He took another shower when he got home, as if it could wash off his remorse and regrets, the words exchanged playing over and over in his mind.
“Joel… I didn’t leave because I didn’t love you anymore.”
“I had to follow my dream. You wanted to stay in Austin. To take care of Tommy.”
“You knew it, you knew why.”
Did he really start to believe that the events had happened differently, after you left? Had he really done it, to the point of omitting certain things, because he needed someone to blame, to keep moving forward? 
Had he really been that guy? Blaming you when there was no one to blame, just life and the choices that go with it, that we all have to do?
Had he really denied for years that you had left with a broken heart, too? That he had told you to never call him, after those wonderful years together? He felt like he was waking up with a monstrous hangover, and guilt gripped him. Truth is he let you down, and reality was hitting him hard.
Because you were right, you didn’t leave just like that. He didn’t want to acknowledge it for years, kept sweeping it under the rug, but deep down he didn’t forget it. 
And you were right, he hadn’t been able to prioritize your relationship. Couldn’t prioritize himself either. He had always been protective of his brother, but it reached another level when he came back to Texas after being dismissed. Tommy wasn't the same, and Joel knew that he would have constantly wondered if his brother was okay if he had left for California with you. Worried that he could be in jail after a fight, with no one to bail him out. Or that he could be drunk in an alley, alone, spending the night there. Or worse.
“I can’t leave Tommy here alone, with all his drinking and partying,” he told you, expression determined.
“But you need to think about your future, our future too, Joel,” you replied desperately.
Joel had probably hoped that you wouldn’t have left, that you’d have chosen him, until the end. And you probably hoped the same thing, too. 
Right person, wrong time. Fucking sad, but so banal.
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So to forget that he was as responsible for the breakup as much as you were, he let his pain turn into anger, and he never let nostalgia set in, or his feelings show up. 
And everything blew up when you sent him that script and he started reading it. It was impossible to continue to deny the obvious, to keep thinking that his feelings were stronger than yours and that’s why you had left. It was impossible to forget that he had told you, “If you leave… you don't call me. Ever.” That he was the one who had cut everything off, once and for all. To protect himself, of course. But still.
So once you were gone, he did what he had to do, he took care of Tommy. Except that he started going to bars with him, at night. Drinking less than him, but still way too much. He took sleeping pills when he was obsessed with your absence, tired of squeezing your pillow way too tight in his fist, his jaw clenched with anger. He moved to a new neighborhood because he couldn't stand living in that apartment anymore where everything reminded him of you. 
When they were children and then teenagers, Joel and Tommy’s father taught them to work with their hands, and it helped them to find jobs on construction sites. And that he finally pulled himself together and helped Tommy the way he had to. It took him months, but he did it, and his parents would be proud of him, of them, if they saw their sons.
He worked hard, kept doing castings when his work allowed it, and eventually it paid off, even if it took time.
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He thought about it all, and realized he needed to see you again before deciding on the movie. Needed to behave normally, to let go of his mask. So he asked his agent your number, then texted you:
it’s Joel. Are you still in LA?  I have some questions about the script can we meet again?  I am. When do you wanna meet? tomorrow night, my place? I’ll cook Sure!
He took a deep breath as he sent you his address. He let his emotions take over on purpose, to dispel the bitter taste in his mouth since you saw each other. Now he had to trust them.
The next day he started to cook during the afternoon, the dish that he hoped was still one of your favorite. He knowingly chose to invite you over to his place, to keep his mind occupied at least while he was busy in the kitchen. 
Once the dish was in the oven, he did a running session on his treadmill and showered. 
Anything to keep his mind busy.
You arrived right on time, a bottle of wine in hand.
“You still like the white?” you asked.
He did. Some things never changed.
As you approached the kitchen it smelled so good that you stopped there.
“Still one of your favorite meals?” he asked.
It was. 
You tried not to show that you were moved. Acts of service had always been his way of showing that he cared, and you weren’t expecting that when you showed up.
You sat down on a high stool in the kitchen and he opened the bottle of wine. You had a few sips, silently. Neither of you really knew what to say, at first. Then everything set into place, naturally, instinctively. A little shyly at first, bringing up things from your respective pasts, or present. You asked him how Tommy was doing, and he told you he was fine, that he was engaged to a woman named Maria and that they were going to be parents soon. You were happy for Tommy, sincerely. You had always liked him.
Joel was trying to act normally, to not pay too much attention to the ease with which you were chatting. How easily he opened up to you, telling you about his years in Austin, then his first ones in LA. His first roles, his doubts.
He was glancing at your hands when you weren’t looking at him. At your hair. 
He loved to see your eyes shine when you were talking about something that was important to you.
But above all, he loved to see them sparkle the first time he made you smile, that evening. It hit him, how much he missed it. Making you smile. 
His emotions were so familiar that his heart was beating a little too fast, like a horse freed from its reins.
And suddenly he wondered how he had been able to spend so many years without you by his side, when you had always been his sunshine, liberating his grumpy, reserved nature. 
A part of his brain told him that he was smiling a little too much, but he felt more alive during those moments with you than he hadn’t been in so long. 
Whether in a relationship or not.
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And then he felt the atmosphere change, felt that you got nervous, an impression confirmed when you began to scratch your thumb. A habit that dated back years ago, and he'd always take you in his arms, kiss your thumb and tell you that he was there and that everything would be okay. Today, for the first time he couldn’t do all that.
“Are you ok?” he nevertheless allowed himself to ask.
“Yeah, it’s just… listen, I know you wanted to ask me about the script, but ehm... there’s something you need to know.” You took a deep breath before adding “there won’t be any movie if you don’t want to do it. If you’re not comfortable with it. I’m not saying this to put pressure on you, it's just… I just want you to know that your choice is completely free. I don’t want you to feel like you have to do it, for whatever bad reason.”
“I appreciate that you’re telling me this, thank you,” he said, in a tone you couldn’t quite define, half defeated, half tender. “Listen, I wanted to apologize.”
“For what, Joel?” you asked questioningly.
“Yesterday. I didn’t really know how to handle all of it. Honestly, I’ve been overwhelmed by a lot of emotions since I read the script. Including anger.” He didn't expect to tell you that, but the need was too much to bear. He needed to make things right.
“I know. I expected it to be complicated, after our two previous meetings,” you said, without animosity or bitterness. Just being factual.
He raised his eyebrows, as if to apologize, before continuing. “I wanted to apologize for that too. My attitude.”
“That’s your way of handling things, it always has been, I should have known. But I appreciate it too, thanks Joel.”
He nodded, then added “do you think we’ll be able to do it?”
“To do what?”
“Work together. To be coworkers on a movie?”
He saw your eyebrows furrow slightly, as you took the time to think before answering.
“Well… the evening’s going pretty well, right? You haven't shook your head at me yet, to show me the door.”
“Ouch!” he replied exaggeratedly.
“Too soon?” you asked, lips curled into a smile.
“A little,” he laughed.
He enjoyed it, that little moment. You’d had so many of them before. 
“Aren’t you afraid of what might happen?” he wanted to ask. 
“Aren’t you afraid of reliving things, that I’ll fall madly in love with you again and that the scenes we’ll shoot, my acting, will just express the reality of my feelings?” 
But he couldn’t ask you that.
He wanted to ask you if you had sent him the script because you still had feelings for him, but he couldn’t say that either.
“It’ll be a low budget movie. I mean, if we do it,” you said. There’ll be some outdoor scenes but not that many. Not many other actors either. It won’t be a long shoot.”
He nodded and said, “can I give you my answer in a couple of days?”
“Of course,” you smiled. “Thanks for the meal, it was delicious,” you said as you stood up. “You can text me if you have any questions.”
He thanked you and you complimented him on his house as you put your coat back on. His taste hadn’t changed. The rooms were simply decorated. As you walked toward the front door you glanced inside one of the rooms, and saw a table with a wooden sculpture on it.
“Oh my god, Joel? You still do the carving?”
“Oh… well… yeah. I never stopped.”
“Can I?” you asked.
“Sure,” he opened the door and you slipped through the gap, brushing past him lightly as you passed and you had goosebumps at the familiar scent. Still the perfume you had gifted him once. Reassuring. After all these years, instantly, it was there. Enveloping you. 
You approached the table and leaned over a piece he was working on, admiring the figurine that was being carved. A rodeo cowboy on a bucking horse.
“Wow, Joel… you were already very good at this back then, but now it’s incredible. The level of detail is mind-blowing.”
You looked at the shelves, covered with other sculptures. You approached them: bears, deer, wolves, rabbits.
“This is really amazing, you’re so talented. And… Do you still play guitar?”
“Sure,” he answered, nodding at a guitar case. “I usually play in the dining room. My guitars are over there. This one needed a little TLC. I just got it back. It’s… well it’s the one you gave me.”
You looked at him, unable to hide the surprise on your face.
“You kept it?” you asked, trying to hold back your emotions.
“ ‘ course I did.”
You nodded, your throat tight.
“I should go, it’s getting late,” you said. “Tell me about the movie, ok?” You looked at him hesitantly, but when he leaned towards you and wrapped his arms around your torso, your eyes closed at the feeling, so familiar, before you pulled away, told him good night and left.
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Driving your car, you replayed the images of the evening in your mind. Of course, you had felt his gaze on you several times during the evening. And sometimes you could see Joel again. Your Joel.
Did he think about you as much as you thought about him? Did he suspect that you had sent him this script in the hope of getting back in touch with him? Did he know how much you missed him, all those years?
You had wondered so many times if he had been thinking about you. You thought about the hug, as comforting as before. You missed him so much.
Two days later, he texted you
“I’m in”
He kept looking at his phone after sending the message. The read indicator appeared quickly, then the writing bubble.
“Great, I'm so glad! I’m sure it’s gonna be amazing!!”
He hoped it would be. Hoped it wasn’t a mistake. 
He had to leave LA for several weeks for a shooting, and the organization of the film was put in place.
You sent each other a few messages in the next few days. Then the messages became more and more regular, while remaining purely friendly.
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Several months later, the day before the shooting started, he knocked on your trailer to say hello.
You had rehearsed some scenes with the crew, and everything was ready.
The less emotional scenes were shot in the first few days. He didn’t ask for it, but he was glad. Every night he came back to his trailer, played the guitar, and thought about you. 
Seeing you every day was a very strange thing that he had trouble to define. He was happy to see you every day, to see the person you had become. And sad that you were no longer his. Filming these moments with you was like constantly reopening a wound that had never really healed.
That night, he took out the script, and reread the scene planned the next day.
EXT. THEIR APARTMENT -- EVENING He parks downstairs at their apartment, it’s dark. He knows she’s back from a week at her parents’. He’s eager to get home and see her again, he’s missed her. He quickly climbs the outside stairs and unlocks the door. INT. THEIR APARTMENT -- EVENING He puts his keys on the hall cabinet, takes off his jacket and hangs it on the coat rack. We follow him as he walks in the apartment, until he sees her in the doorway of the dining room. He smiles, we see love in their eyes as look at other. HER Hey baby He goes to her, they kiss, he takes her in his arms. She closes her eyes. HIM I missed you, baby. He brushes her cheek with his thumb. HER I missed you too. She takes his hand and leads him to their bedroom.
He stopped reading there, before the next scene, that was the most intimate, the one that made him anxious just to think about.
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“I missed you, baby,” he said the line. He brushed your cheek with his thumb, like he had done so many times before. His eyes were fixed in yours. He wondered if he was imagining what he was reading in them.
“I missed you too.”
You took his hand and you headed out of the frame.
“Cut, it was perfect, guys! Go get ready for the next scene.”
He picked up his water bottle and took a sip. He felt dizzy.
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You were both wearing underwear and bathrobes. Waiting to shoot the scene.
“Ok guys, you’re ready? Great, let’s go.”
The scene was a close-up of both of your faces during a sex scene, at night. You lay down on the bed first, after taking off your robe. He took off his too and lay down between your thighs.
“Is this ok?” he asked.
“Yeah, it’s ok,” you smiled.
“Action!”
You started to kiss, tongues quickly brushing against each other. His hands cupped your cheeks as he rolled his hips towards you slowly, careful that your crotches wouldn’t touch. 
It was overwhelming to feel you against him, your breasts against his chest, with only your bra between the two of you. It was a whirling moment, to kiss you in such an intimate scene, playing something that you had lived for real before. He groaned and slid his hand to the back of your neck to hold you as close as possible against him.
He felt you shift slightly, turning your hips to face his. He wanted to ask you what you were doing but he couldn’t. He was half hard from the moment he laid against you but now his cock was hard as steel. You pushed your pelvis forward and the tip of his cock nestled at your entrance, pointing against his boxers.
He could feel your wet panties through the fabrics.
“Don’t stop, baby,” you recited your line, and he growled.
He couldn’t believe you would act like that while shooting a scene, couldn't believe you were using him.
He pulled away to look at you and you murmured an unscripted “please.” Eyebrows furrowed, he nodded slightly. His fat head found its way, and his tip pushed your panties in.
It was hot, filthy, forbidden. So unprofessional, but he couldn’t stop. He recognized your moans, and the small team around you probably thought it was perfectly faked, when it was music in his ears. The music he thought he would never hear again. 
Your hands tightened on his biceps as you came. So quickly. He felt your walls squeezing his tip and he almost forgot to move, forgot the script, forgot you were shooting a scene. He pulled out, afraid he would come too, and faked his orgasm, neck tense and veins bulging, your hands caressing his hair at the back of his neck.
You said the next line “I love you, baby. I missed you so much.”
“I love you too,” was his.
“Cut!! That was amazing, great job!!”
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There was a pounding on your trailer door as you got out of the shower. You quickly threw on a bathrobe and went to open it.
“What the fuck were you thinking?” he growled.
“Keep your voice low Joel, damn… Come in.”
You closed the door behind him, searching for the right words, pressing your hands together. 
“I, huh…” you stammered.
“No! No, talk to me. Tell me. You can’t… you can’t do that and stay silent.”
“I’m sorry.”
“You’re sorry?” he chuckled.
“Having you so close to me, against me… I couldn’t help myself. I’m sorry. It was overwhelming.”
���Everyone could have seen, what were you thinking?”
“I wasn’t thinking, that’s the point, Joel! And they didn’t see, anyway.”
“Jesus christ you can't do that. You can’t just use me like that.”
“I know, Joel. I know, I’m sorry. It’s just…”
“What?”
You sighed, and that time he didn't try to rush you. You felt him soften, giving you time to find your words.
“I miss you, Joel.”
“No, don't…  Please, don’t say that.”
“I missed you the second I left and it never stopped.”
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Hearing the tone of your voice and reading your eyes, this time he had no doubt that you really meant it. And he felt all the tensions in his body relax, as if he were freed from everything that had been oppressing him for years. You approached him slowly, eyes raised to his, and you slid your hand into his, and his large palm gently closed over it. You caressed his cheek with the other, and for a moment he shut his eyes, pressing his face against your hand.
“I miss you,” you said again and he rested his forehead against yours. He gently rubbed his nose against yours, before kissing your lips softly. He heard your breathing hitch for a moment, then you moaned slightly as you pulled away, just to look at him, Joel, not the actor, for the first time in years. He pulled you closer to him and brushed his tongue over your lips, as if asking for permission to push inside. Greedily, you slid yours to his, licking his tongue and lips, until he crashed his mouth against yours. His hands rested on your waist while yours moved up his back, pressing your bodies together. You whined when you felt his hard cock pressed to you.
You pulled away from him again, just to look at his face, and he wanted to pinch himself, just to be sure you were not some dream that would leave him disillusioned and alone when he woke up.
You took his hand and led him to your room.
“Undress me,” you said.
He pulled on the knot of your bathrobe slowly, making the two sides of the garment part, revealing the curve of your breasts that he caressed with his fingertips.
Your chest rose quickly as your eyes were plunged into each other, until he lowered them to your pussy. His heart was beating so fast that for a moment he was afraid it would explode.
He raised his gaze to yours, silently asking if you were okay.
“Yes,” you said. As if you knew he would want to hear it, that a nod wouldn't be enough.
He slipped his hands under the fabric of the robe and slid it down your shoulders. It fell to the floor, leaving you naked. So vulnerable, and yet you were the strongest woman he ever knew, following your dream by leaving for a city where you didn't know anyone. And made your dream come true.
But now you were here, in front of him. So pretty, so sure of yourself, of your desires.
“You’re so beautiful,” he said in a low voice.
He pulled you back, guiding you with his hands on your hips as he kissed you, until the back of your knees touched the bed.
“Lie down, sweetheart,” he said. The nickname was so familiar in his mouth, so normal. You did as he asked, moving back until your head rested on the pillow as he watched you, still standing at the end of the bed. Then he took off his t-shirt, unbuttoned his jeans and got rid of them and his boxers.
“Are you ok?” he asked.
“Yes,” you replied. “Haven't felt better in a long time, actually.”
“Me too,” he added, laying on the bed, his hand caressing your inner thighs that he kissed, then he spread them with his hands.
He ran his thumb over your folds, covering it in your wetness until he reached your clit and gently rolled it under his finger. You moaned, spreading your thighs wider. 
He leaned down, his shoulders taking possession of the space between your thighs, the scent of your arousal filling his nostrils. He licked a long stripe from your drooling hole to your clit, then placed his hands on the inside of your thighs, pressing your knees against the sheets, and you willingly let him do it, your hands sliding into his hair. He pushed his tongue into your cunt, growling against your folds. He never thought he would taste you again and an overwhelming feeling was running through his whole body. You were leaking into his mouth, down his throat and he pressed you against him, greedy for what you were giving him as your hips rolled towards him. His nose brushed perfectly against your clit, like it always did before. You clung to his hair as your moans were getting louder and louder.
"I'm so close, Joel," you murmured, hands lost in his curls. "Please, baby, please." 
“Take what you need, use me, sweetheart.”
“Oh my god, Joel… I’m gonna… I’m coming, fuck!”
He didn't let go of you, leaving his tongue buried in your pussy and his nose against your clit, gripping  your waist with his hands, as if they were in their natural place, your flesh welcoming them.
“Joel…” you whimpered.
“Another one, please, baby. Let me give you another one, ok?”
“I’m not sure if I can… I don’t know if I can,” you panted.
“Lemme try, ok?”
“Ok,” you whispered.
His tongue left your pussy, licking your puffy folds before teasing your swollen clit. His middle finger slid along your folds before he pushed it in you gently, immediately adding a second digit. His fingers pumped into you, making your wetness flow down to the sheets. He kept you pressed against the mattress, as he had done so many times, drunk on your taste and smell. His cock ached but he resisted the urge to grind himself against the bed, afraid of not being able to hold back and come on them.
“I can feel you clench on my fingers, you’re gonna be a good girl and come again for me?” he asked, before swirling his tongue over your clit again. “Thought about it so often,” he added, still pumping your drooling cunt with his thick fingers, then licking and sucking your clit.
“Yes, fuck yes,” you whined, just before you came on his diggits, clit pulsing against his tongue.
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He crawled over to you, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, and smashed his lips against yours, your wimpers now disappearing between them.
“I wanna suck your cock, Joel,” you breathed against his lips, but he shook his head. 
“Sweetheart… I'd love it too but I’m gonna come the second you’ll take me in your mouth,” he said. “And I really need to feel you around my cock. All the way this time, not just the tip. You’re ok with that, baby?”
“Of course, need to feel you too.”
“Damn you’re so pretty,” he said, and kissed you.
He grabbed his cock in his hand, the tip leaking, swollen and red, and nestled it at your entrance, pausing there for a moment before thrusting in. 
“Oh fuck…” you whined, making him stop.
“No, no no, don’t stop, I’m ok. Need all of you, please,” you whimpered.
Like years ago, he would give you everything you needed from him. So he didn't stop until he bottomed out. 
“Shit,” he groaned, feeling his balls tightening, ready to explode. He was struggling so hard not to come, but his breath was hitching with every thrust since he felt your pussy around him. 
You kissed, hips rolling towards each other softly and slowly. He loved to feel you around him again, and again he thought that your bodies were made for each other. He was sure of it more than ever. He slid his arms under your shoulders and you licked his neck, right at his pulsating point, then kissed the thin and delicate skin crossed by its veins.
“I won’t last, baby, I’m sorry…” he panted.
You wrapped your legs around his waist, taking him deeper.
“It doesn’t matter, fill me, Joel, please, just like before,” you begged, making him grawl, and he placed his thumb against your clit. It was enough to give you soon another climax and you pulsed around his shaft, digging your fingers into his skin as you came once again. He thrusted in a few times before burying himself, balls deep in your cunt, and shot his cum into your core, filling it to the last drop, his forehead against yours.
“Fuck, sweetheart….”
“I know,” you breathed. “Just like before.” 
For a few minutes both of you were panting loudly, waiting to catch your breath.
Then you caressed his cheek and he kissed you until he pulled away and lay down facing you.
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“Come here, baby,” he said, welcoming you against his chest. He wrapped his arms around you, the way he always liked it so much. You stayed like that for a few minutes without talking. He just wanted to feel you against him, to hear you breathe slowly, to feel your skin against his. 
“I should have left with you,” he said suddenly.
You straightened up to look at him then said softly, “hey, no, don’t… Don’t hurt yourself by thinking that. You did what you had to do, and so did I. And we met again, like you said back then,” you added, and kissed him, then curled up in his arms again.
“We did,” he agreed, brushing your hair delicately. “So, that script?” he asked. “Was it to… like… get me back?”
“Of course it was,” you smiled against his torso, and he kissed the top of your head. 
“I’m happy you sent it to me, sweetheart.”
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hees-mine · 3 days ago
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Second chance - L. HS
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Pairing: heeseung X reader
Warnings: smut, the usual.
Genre: ex’s to?
WC: almost 4k
-
“Didn’t expect to see you here.” You rolled your eyes the moment you heard your ex’s voice from over your shoulder.
It was a party your mutual friends were throwing, so you don’t know why he thought you wouldn’t be there, but something deep down is telling you he knows full well and just wanted an excuse to come up and talk to you.
“Surprise, surprise,” you mumbled in response, tapping the rim of your glass.
“You treat me like I’m a stranger.” he lowers his head with a soft chuckle and takes the vacant stool next to you to sit on.
“Not a stranger, but no need to be unnecessarily cordial,” you say, not sparing him a glance.
“Would it be unnecessary to at least treat me with some decency?” His question is almost laughable to you.
“The same way you treated me with decency back when we dated,” your reply is sarcastically, and he can’t help but chuckle.
“So you’re still not over it?” He says, referring to the breakup.
“No, I am. I just find it funny after how things ended. You expect me to just welcome you back into my good graces.” Picking up your cup, you take a small sip of liquor.
“The past is the past. We could always start anew, you know, maybe even be friends,” he shrugs.
“You can’t be serious.” Laughing incredulously, you roll your eyes once again, finding him to be amusing.
“Fine, maybe not friends, maybe we could be fuck buddies” his suggestion sounds even more humorous than his previous statement. This just kept getting better and better.
“So that’s why you’re bothering me? You don’t have any shame do you?” You finally look at him and he looks like the same old heeseung that broke your heart.
“No need to feel shame. I’m just a guy who misses his ex’s pussy” he smirks.
“You’re disgusting.” You scrunch your nose, making a face of disgust.
“Fair enough,” he annoyingly grabs your cup, purposely drinking from the spot that had your lip stain on it. “But don’t for a second act like you don’t miss the way I fuck you,” he says cockily. “Besides, if I recall correctly, the last time I had my dick in you, you said it was the best ever.”
You cringe at the thought. “That was then, this is now.” You keep a straight face.
“Okay, will let me give you a refresher.” he places his hand over yours. “Let me remind you what it’s like to have me inside you.” he looks at your lips, then your eyes, his tongue licking the remains of your liquor off his plump lips.
A shaky sigh escapes your lips, and you close your eyes, exhaling deeply, hating that he still had this effect on you. “I think I should get going.” Attempting to leave proves useless as he grabs your wrist, keeping you there.
“I think you should come back to my place with me. Come on, no strings attached, just me and you for one night.”
It’s hard to say no, it’s hard to think straight after five months, you’re still not over him. He pops up in your dreams. Sometimes, you swear you still smell his cologne on your pillow or the soft melody of him humming in your silent apartment.
Obviously, one of you was more affected by the split, that being you, and right now, instead of keeping your ground, you felt yourself slipping.
“This isn’t the best idea,” you mutter to him.
“So? Who cares, baby? Let me fuck you” his words sound gross in your ears but still give you a chill in your spine. His request is so nasty yet irresistible.
“I- I have too much respect for myself to allow this now if you’ll excuse me I’m heading home” you stood up and he quickly follows you not ready to take no for an answer you both weave through the crowd him hot on your trail.
“Respect? Is that what you call it when you were sucking me off in the public bathroom stall? Or when you let me bend you over the balcony? And don’t forget that time we spent Christmas at your families. You were so fucking needy for it you could barely keep your hands off my cock at the dinner table” You’re both at the exit now, making your way outside. The fresh air feels chilly on your skin, but it does little to nothing to quell the heat between your legs, his words going straight to your core, and you hate to admit how much just the memory was turning you on. “Had to cup your mouth the whole time while I fucked you 'cause you couldn’t keep those slutty little moans to yourself” he presses himself against your back, his hot breath fanning your ear.
“S-stop it.” You squeeze your eyes shut, trying to ground yourself.
“Why?” He places his hands on your waist, and you don’t push him away.
“Cause-“
He cuts through your words. “Cause it’s turning you on, isn’t it? Bet that pussy is already getting sticky for me.”
-
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junkpuppet225 · 3 days ago
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warning: smut, you’re responsible for the content you consume
-
It took nearly two weeks before you were alone with Daryl - by then he’d lost his nerve, keeping his head down around you once again. Carol was in the kitchen the night of your hangover offering water and ibuprofen then before long Rick showed up and pulled a reluctant Daryl away to discuss important information about the community. By the time Daryl started going out with Aaron to find more people whatever you thought may happen between the two of you was just a memory.
Until it wasn’t. The night Rick killed Pete changed everything. The night Daryl brought Morgan to Alexandria you sat staring into the bonfire while everyone gaped at the consequences of the doctors actions - the single deafening shot still ringing in your ears as Rick stands staring down the barrel of his colt python to Pete’s lifeless body. You were cold or possibly in shock, trying to push the horrid images from your mind as you focused on your shaking hands. Concerned voices were just murmurs around you as you closed your fingers into fists and tried to will the panic away, sending a single tear down your cheek as you blinked and Daryl’s handsome face came into view.
He was knelt before you - blue eyed wide and unfamiliar. You’d never seen this emotion on his face before. Daryl was afraid and that sent another surge of adrenaline through you - allowing your limbs to join in on the shaking as you placed your palm to his arm, eyes widening when he doesn’t flinch away from your touch. “You alright?”
No. You just watched a man slice through another man’s larynx then take a bullet to the dome for his trouble. Deanna is going to banish you all - send Carl and Judith back into the horrors of the world. Just when you thought you could start something important here your group would be thrown back to the dead.
“Answer me.” Daryl’s words aren’t demanding, they’re soft and pleading as another tear betrays you. “Y-yeah. Im okay. Are you okay?” You’d seen Rick kill people before - that wasn’t anything new but this look on Daryl’s face, the disparity swimming in his ocean eyes makes it hard to breathe. “I am now.” He whispers offering his hand as he lifts you to your feet and holds you close to his side. Rick is trying to explain himself to Morgan and the others while the rest of the group share your worried glances that all of this will soon be taken away.
“Come with me?” You look up to Daryl’s soft words and nod without thinking. You would go anywhere with him, especially if it’s somewhere away from this nightmare. He slips his warm hand in yours, his palm searing against your icy fingers as he guides you silently to the house Deanna gifted your group weeks ago. Daryl doesn’t speak until you’re standing in the darkness of the kitchen, your hand still held tightly in his as the other comes up to cup your cheek - brushing his thumb against your jaw as he searches your eyes.
The raw emotion in his gaze tightens something in your chest, bringing your hand to his bicep as you try to steady yourself and make sense of what has him so upset. Daryl’s always been brave but standing here in the shadows he looks truly terrified.
“We almost died out there today.” The words come rushing from his lungs as he shakes the thought for the millionth time and lets his head hang, pulling you closer as he drops your hand to grasp your hip. “…if it wasn’t for Morgan…” Tears blur your vision at the thought of losing him, your breath catching in your throat as his words turn into soft whispers. “…never gettin’ to see you again - never… touchin’ you again.” Daryl sinks a hand into your soft hair and brings your face to his, bringing your foreheads together as his eyes close tightly. “…scares the shit outta me.”
Slowly you bring your hands to his neck before slipping them into the back of his hair as a low desperate groan escapes him and he lifts his eyes to yours - grasping at your hip as he pulls you flush against his chest and leans into your parted lips, kissing you slowly.
Everything but Daryl melts away. The worry of losing this place - of losing this, it slips into the deepest parts of your mind and there’s just him kissing you like his very life depends on it. His rough hand slipping into your shirt to grasp at your soft skin as his tongue moves against yours slowly, your quiet gasps stirring something deep inside of him.
His hand moves further up your shirt before he hesitates just below your breast as you whisper against his lips to please touch you. The growl that leaves him vibrates in your chest as his fingers brush against the rough texture of your bra before moving on to join his other hand in your hair.
The terror in Daryl’s eyes shift, still lingering in their depths but somehow shadowed by white-hot desire that takes your breath away. “Daryl?” His own breath hitch’s as your lips graze his. “Y-yeah?” The word is barely audible. “Do you want me?” You watch his eyes fall to your mouth with a grunt that sounds like a yes.
“Show me?”
Daryl lifts you to the counter with ease while your arms wrap around his shoulders and he pulls you to his chest - his kiss more desperate as you tighten your fingers in his hair. Your heart is hammering in your chest, fear that someone from your group is going to burst through the front door and demand Daryl’s attention pulls you away from him. “Take me upstairs?” You whisper as another growl escapes him and he pulls you closer to his chest - turning to the stairs as your legs wrap around him - his mouth finding yours as you rake your fingers into his hair and cling to him. He doesn’t stop until you’re lying on his bed and he’s looking down at you with that terror in his eyes again.
I can’t lose you too.
“Daryl…, it’s okay. I want this… want you.”
In a hundred years he’ll never understand what he did to deserve you - to deserve this but the thought of denying you anything sends a different kind of ache through his chest so he kisses you, sinking his body into yours as you grasp at his waist to push his shirt over his head - letting your hands fall to his back as he takes in a quick breath, his body going rigid from your touch.
Daryl lifts his head slowly as your fingers trace the raised lines across his back, your eyebrows pulling together in concern. “Daryl…?”
“It’s okay.” He whispers holding his breath as you return your fingers to his hair while his teeth graze your jugular. “…happened a long time ago.” That doesn’t ease the ache seeping into your bones from the thought of something hurting him but his tongue against your skin blurs the line of pain and pleasure.
“Daryl.” His name slips quietly from your lips bringing another low growl against your skin as he pushes your own shirt over your head before dipping his between the valley of your breasts - placing a line of kisses down your torso as a gasp escapes you. Daryl groans out your name, griping at your hips to tug your shorts down your thighs. You arch your back to him as his mouth finds yours - like he can’t stop kissing you but is desperate to be inside of you - his head hanging to watch you undo his belt. “A-are you sure?” He whispers, lifting his eyes to yours slowly.
“Yes.” He’s kissing you again, sinking his hands into your hair as you grip his sides while he pushes inside of you resting his forehead against yours with a whimper. “Y/N…, feels…” Your eyes meet - his gaze sobering as he whispers how good you feel around him with each thrust, his arm sliding under your back to bring you closer. The soft moans and quiet gasps that fill his head pushing him further, fucking into you harder as his own groans fill the room.
“…oh god, Daryl…” Your body is humming with pleasure, fingers gripping his shoulders as he pours years of need into fucking you, lifting his head slightly as his name falls from your desperate lips again as your body tightens around him. “…fuck…, that’s it… gonna make me…” You grip the back of Daryl’s hair, pulling hard as he groans against your throat - moving faster as stars dot your vision and you feel yourself come undone around him - leaning into his shoulder with a cry as his grunts turn to whimpers and he loses himself inside of you, gripping your hips so hard you know he’ll leave bruises in their wake. All you can hear is the pounding of your heart in your chest and his heavy breathing as he buries his face in the bend of your shoulder.
“W-was that okay? Did I hurt ya?”
Daryl lifts his head quickly - searching your cock drunk gaze as a lazy smile spreads across your beautiful face. “It was beautiful.” You assure him softly as his own rare grin lights up his ocean eyes. “You’re beautiful.” You watch his eyes go wide as the words slip from his lips quickly, a warmth spreading through you at the slight rush of pink that creeps up his neck and into his cheeks as you card your fingers through the back of his hair.
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jjslvt · 2 days ago
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AYO TECHNOLOGY ── .✦ mdni, 18+ .ᐟ.ᐟ
❝she wants it. so? i gotta give it to her.❞ 𓏲𝄢 (slight song inspo)
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imagine sexting fwb!jj to the point of you two being absolutely frustrated and losing your goddamn minds. both of you had plans today but when you sent him that first risky photo, it all went downhill from there.
you two ignored texts from anyone else and went at it, from one nude photo to another until he started texting teasing words and you replied with even more filth.
his cock already leaking in precum when he started reading those messages and it didn’t take long for him to snake his hand down his boxers, recalling the feeling of your tight cunt around him.
> fuckin’ hell, mama…
[ 11:45 AM ]
> already touching yourself, jj? imagining my pretty little pussy like a cocksleeve?
[ 11:46 AM ]
he groaned at that, gripping tighter and giving himself a few pumps before replying.
> you know i am and idk what’s got into you baby but i ain’t complaining, holy…
[ 11:48 AM ]
> i was listenin’ to this song & thought of you… fucking me in every position, jayyy. been touching myself already… so wet…
[ 11:50 AM ]
and boy, did he love when his friend was this dirty for him. in fact, he hadn’t even hooked up with others since you two started this thing.
so, the sexting went on until it eventually reached calling each other after coming the first time because it wasn’t enough for you, nor him.
you both came again after hearing each other pant and groan into the phone, talking vulgar. you even went as far as to put the speaker near your pussy so he could hear every lewd and slick squelch which made him explode.
“hnghhh, f-fuuuuck… you…” he let out a guttural groan then tried to calm himself a bit. he just couldn’t get the sounds out of his ears, it’s like they replayed.
“babe, i don’t think technology is gonna be enough for papa j…” he sounded so wrecked and his cock was still painfully throbbing even after coming twice, he was still full stamina. every vein was protruding and felt hot. especially after hearing that.
you had some power over him, making him feel so desperate for you.
“yeah? need me, jay?” you barely panted out, equally as wrecked.
“god yes. i need you right in front of me.” he replied and you smirked to yourself because he quoted a lyric from that song. to think, one song turned your imagination wild and had you this horny for him.
“yeah? then papa j should come to mama right now… should come fuck my brains out.”
he instantly took that invitation, rising up from his bed—not giving a shit if he was ditching any plans with the bros. he needed you now.
“oh, you better be ready cos i’m gonna fuck you til you can’t walk… until you forget your own damn name, sweetheart- riling me up so much.”
that made you almost whimper into the phone, your cunt already aching to feel him inside of you and your stomach feeling butterflies.
“hurry up, jj… get over here and fuck me dumb.”
in record time, he arrived and had you riding him first on your bed as he stuffed his cock into you, thrusting upwards roughly with every bounce you gave. his hands gripping your hips so tightly, it might have bruised even but it all felt pleasurable.
you grabbed onto his shoulders, nails digging into his skin and he nipped your earlobe in return.
you kept rolling and grinding your hips when you rode him. both of you feeling extra sensitive from everything so he let out grunts into your ear, holding you close as you let out moans & whines every time he hit those spots.
it didn’t even end there because he really kept his promise and fucked you dumb, giving you every drop of his cum that he could muster until he was spent.
you fucking loved it.
both of you lying on your backs with the rapid risings and fallings of your chest.
“you… haa, really… did that…” you panted.
“hah. yeah, y’know i always deliver for you… were hornier than me i think, darlin.”
you huffed because he wasn’t wrong, though he got super horny too. you did start it so you flushed at that and he turned his head, seeing and smirking. he raised a hand to stroke your cheek.
“i enjoyed it… you can be needy for me. you can want me, this is mutual. promise to satisfy you every time.”
you felt something in your chest stir at that. he would get surprisingly soft after all the raunchy stuff and all you could do was nuzzle into his neck.
and he was also feeling the same. he wrapped an arm around you and wondered how much longer you two would keep up the whole “fwb” situation.
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note: first smut here. hope it was worth something aha
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mommyslittlebird · 2 days ago
Text
Pendulum
Wanda x Reader, WandaNat x Reader
After a session with Wanda the prior evening, you wake up alone in your bed and find you’re a bit more reliant on her than you’d like to be.
CW: Sub drop, (kinda) panic attack, mood swings, guilt, Mommy Kink, mentions of spanking, established WandaNat (no cheating), pills (Tylenol and Xanax), Wanda generally being a protective and worried mama
Word Count: 3.2k
A/N: I may know hardly anything about dom drop, but I’m ✨well versed✨ in sub drop. I honestly think this one is adorable and I hope you all enjoy.
A/N: I wasn’t doing this consciously, but reading this back I realize I kinda did a reverse YAIL, so, if you haven’t already, go check out that series by @wandasaura
You woke up in a cold sweat, gasping for air before your head even left the pillow. It was hard to find anything to ground you in your dark bedroom, but with the help of your stuffed bear, Francis, and some breathing exercises you’d been working on in therapy, you were able to calm down at least enough to breathe. Still, you found yourself dizzy, nauseous, in pain, and, perhaps most excruciatingly, alone.
Wanda. Where was Wanda? Where was your mommy? You needed mommy.
“Mommy?” You cried quietly into the empty room. But she wasn’t there. Of course she wasn’t there. She was at home, tucked peacefully into bed with Natasha, her wife. And you were here, in your cold, empty apartment, all alone.
You turned to look at the clock on your bedside table. 1:30 am. It was far too late to call her. She had to get up for work in a couple hours. You had to get up for class in a couple hours.
But god, you needed her. You needed just to hear her voice. Everything felt so empty without her here. Your brain felt like it was underwater. You couldn’t think. It felt like your mind was strapped to a pendulum, swinging back and forth between extremes. It’s like half of your mind was begging for Wanda while the other half scolded you for your over-reliance. You wanted her, but you didn’t want to want her. It was hyper-dependence clashing with hyper-independence in an internal battle that left you dazed and confused.
Just call her, you thought. She told you to call her if this ever happened.
You’d been her submissive for months, and, though you’d never actually experienced sub drop with her, the two of you had discussed it extensively. “You can call me at any time,” she’d said. “Even if it's been days. I’m here for you in any way you need me.”
You grabbed your phone from the nightstand, pulling up her contact and hovering over the call button. But before you could press it, the pendulum swung back. You hurled the phone into your beanbag on the other side of the room.
What are you thinking? You can’t call her. She’s not your fucking girlfriend. You’re so reliant on her and she doesn’t even care about you. Leave her alone. This is your mess. Handle it.
You sighed, dragging your aching body off of your mattress. Everything hurt. The wounds she’d so loving inflicted the night before ached even more than they had when they were fresh. You wanted, needed, to feel her soft hands massaging soothing balm into your skin like they had only hours prior. But no.
Wanda. Wasn’t. Here.
It was just you and you alone. You needed to take care of this. You needed to pull yourself together and handle this on your own. You felt like you might be sick. The swinging of this pendulum was nauseating. You dragged yourself to the bathroom, pulling two Tylenol and a Xanax from the medicine cabinet. You sat on the toilet, tucking your head between your knees.
You didn’t understand what was happening. Or rather, you didn’t understand why it was happening. Wanda had done everything perfectly, just like she always did. She’d insisted you stay with her until you were out of subspace and your mind was clear again. She’d given you all the cuddles and love and reassurance you could possibly want. She’d even rubbed that soothing lotion on your sore ass despite the fit you’d pitched about it. This shouldn’t be happening. She’d done everything she was supposed to do. You were the problem.
You moved from the bathroom to your living room, pacing anxious circles until you worried the neighbors would complain. Then you decided on a walk.
A little walk to clear your head. That should help. No need to bother Wanda. You could take care of this by yourself.
—————
A little over two blocks proved you could not, in fact, take care of this by yourself. You found yourself collapsed on a bench outside your favorite coffee shop, her contact pulled up on your phone, sobbing as your thumb hovered over the call button.
You clicked it, anxiously awaiting an answer through the dial tone. Every second without an answer was a battle not to hit the red button, and smash your phone on the ground so you wouldn’t be tempted to try this again.
“Hello?” You heard, not Wanda, but Natasha’s sleep addled voice.
You silently cursed, debating hanging up the phone and forgetting the whole endeavor. You had very limited experience in dealing with Natasha. Where Wanda was warm and inviting, Natasha was cold and intimidating. Wanda had told you once that Natasha had a soft spot for you, but you remained unconvinced any of Natasha’s spots were “soft”.
Wanda had explained to you that Natasha’s had submissives of her own, but she tended to prefer brats, submissives who needed a harsher hand. “It’s not that she doesn’t like you,” Wanda had explained, “she’s just not used to sweet little girls like you.”
Still, the woman terrified you. And she definitely was NOT the one you wanted to be speaking to right now. But you took a deep breath, and answered her. “H-hello, Miss Natasha. C-can I speak to Wanda?” You stammered. You couldn’t keep the tears and desperation out of your voice when you added a “…please.”
“Y-yeah, sure honey. Just a second let me get her up,” she responded tiredly.
Your heart shattered at the thought of Natasha rousing a peaceful Wanda from her sleep just because you couldn’t get yourself together. But all such thoughts faded when you heard her voice through the phone. “Angel? Is that you? Is everything okay? Are you hurt? What’s going on?”
“Mommy…” you said tearfully. “I’m okay. I promise I’m okay, I just… I don’t know what’s happening. I mean I’m dropping, I know, but… I don’t know. I just needed so badly to hear you and talk to you. I’m sorry for waking you up. I’m so sorry. I know you said….” You were rambling breathlessly, but Wanda soon cut you off.
“Breathe for me, little love,” she instructed softly. “Three deep breaths. In and out. Can you do that for me, angel?”
You nodded despite knowing she couldn’t see you over the phone. You took three audible breaths, calming yourself down.
“Good girl,” she praised. “Now, can you tell me what’s happening?”
“I… I… Sub drop, I think,” you explained. “But like, really bad.”
“Aww,” she cooed. “I’m so sorry, my little love. Can you explain to me what you're feeling? Are you in pain? Do you need company?”
“I just… I don’t know why this is happening to me,” you cried. “Everything hurts so bad. My head feels like it’s spinning. And… And my body is so sore. It’s never happened like this with you before. You did everything so perfectly. I just don’t understand why I’m being like this.”
“Sub drop can happen no matter what, honey. And I’m so sorry it’s happening to you, sweetheart. Do you need to come back over?” She asked.
You pondered her question, the pendulum inside of you swinging violently. You felt like you were being torn in half between admitting you needed her help, and feeling defeated and weak that you couldn’t handle it on your own. But eventually you remembered it didn’t really matter. You made your choice when you took the Xanax. You weren’t going anywhere now. “I-I took some medicine. I can’t drive. I’m sorry,” you admitted.
“What medicine?” She asked, panicked. “Did you take too much? Are you okay?”
“It was just a Xanax. Just one. Just like I take for school sometimes,” you reassured.
You heard her breathe a sigh of relief on the other end of the line. “Okay, sweetheart. I’m sorry I panicked. You know I just worry sometimes. I tell you what, Nat and I are going to get you an Uber, and then you can spend the rest of the night here, okay?”
“Wanda, you don’t have to-“ You didn’t use her real name very often given the exclusively sexual nature of your relationship, but you needed her to know she wasn’t responsible for being your dominant right now. She was Wanda, and you were you: two grown adults. She didn’t have any obligation to take care of you right now, in the middle of the night on a Wednesday.
“But I want to, darling,” she interrupted. “Is that okay?”
“Y-yeah, but I’m not at the house right now.”
You heard her breath catch. “Where are you, honey? You promise me you’re safe?”
“I-I’m just at the coffee shop,” you explained. “I wanted to take a walk, b-but I didn’t make it very far.”
Wanda sighed. She’d have to have a little talk with you about walking all by yourself in the middle of the night. But not right now. Right now she just needed you in her arms as quickly as she could have you. “Alright, love. You’ve got a car on its way. Just stay on the phone with me until it gets there, okay?”
“O-okay.”
—————
The car was there within five minutes of Wanda’s order. Most of that time was just filled with tears and mumbled apologies on your end, and reassurance and encouragement on hers.
She waited anxiously by the front door for you to arrive, peeking out of the blinds with every set of headlights that passed by. She clutched her robe tight against her chest. If you were there, you would’ve teased her about her anxious habit. You always said she was “practically clutching her pearls.”
When you finally pulled into the driveway, she was standing in the front door frame before you could even get out of the car.
“Mommy!” You ran up to her, nearly tripping on the front porch steps on your way in. You were even more hysterical now that you were seeing her in person. Something about the sight of her made you fall apart. You felt safe now. You were going to fall, and she was going to catch you, and everything was going to be okay.
“Careful, love,” she chided, taking you into her arms. “Mommy’s got you. It’s okay. You’re okay. I’m gonna take care of you and I’m not gonna let anything bad happen to you.”
It sounded more like she was reassuring herself than anything, but her words still washed over you like a wave of relief. “I missed you, mommy.”
“I know you did, angel,” she said, kissing you on the temple. “Mommy missed you, too.”
She wrapped her arms just under your ass, still sore and super sensitive from your activities earlier that night. She picked you up, wrapping your legs around your waist. You squeaked in a mixture of surprise and pain.
“I’m sorry, baby. I know you’re sore. I’ll be gentle,” she cooed. “Let’s get you to bed. Tasha will be waiting for us.”
You just cried, burying your face into Wanda’s neck as she carried you up the stairs. You couldn’t talk anymore. You were so completely exhausted, mentally and physically. But it was okay. You had your mommy and everything was going to be okay. The bedroom door was already open, and, as Wanda had expected, Natasha was sat up against the headboard.
“Is that a little angel I see there?” You heard Natasha ask. Wanda sat you on her lap at the end of the bed, bending down to take off your shoes.
You peaked your eyes out from Wanda’s neck before perching your chin on her shoulder. “Hi Miss Natasha,” you sniffled. “I’m sorry I woke you up.”
“That’s alright, little angel,” she assured, sliding closer to you and Wanda on the bed. She looked so much kinder than usual, soft sleepy eyes smiling at you through your tears. “Is it okay if I touch you?”
You nodded, still teary eyed and snotty on Wanda’s lap while she unlaced your shoes.
Natasha cupped your cheek, wiping away stray tears. “It must’ve been so scary to start dropping without your mommy there, huh?” Her touch was unexpectedly gentle, as were her words. Maybe Wanda was right, maybe she really did have a soft spot for you.
You nodded, trying to speak but only managing to whimper a “mhm.” You blushed a little with embarrassment. Wanda must’ve told her all about your situation. You wondered momentarily if she thought your behavior was overblown or ridiculous, but if she did, her gentle face showed no indication.
“But now you’ve got your mommy and everything’s gonna be okay, right?”
You nodded again. “I-I hope you don’t mind if I steal your wife for a little bit for-for some extra snuggles.”
“Not at all little angel.” Natasha smiled softly. She could see your anxious embarrassment, and decided, despite her inexperience with soft subs, she’d make an attempt to soothe you. She knew she wasn't expected to, but she found herself desperate to make you feel better, even if it was only a little bit. “Your mommy could hardly stop bragging about you tonight, you know?”
“Re-really?” You asked. Natasha could see the tiniest little twinkle in your teary eyes.
“Really,” she confirmed. “She told me she was so proud of her sweet girl for calling her, because that must’ve been so scary for her, to call in the middle of the night. She knows you don’t like to wake people up, and asking for help when you need it is so so hard. And I said ‘wow, it sounds like you have the bravest little angel in the whole world. I think she deserves some extra special snuggles from mommy tonight, for being so brave.’”
“Y-you really think so?” you asked bashfully, hiding back in Wanda’s neck.
“I really do,” she confirmed. “And you know your mommy keeps her phone on silent in the nighttime. But she cares about you so much she has a special setting so it rings just for you.”
You smiled. Your heart fluttered, not only at the idea Wanda had her phone on for you, but also at the thought that Natasha must’ve known it was you before she answered. “I-I thought you might be mad at me,” you confessed. “Cause you and-and mommy were probably all snuggled up in bed and I came in and messed it all up!”
Natasha stroked your cheek as she shook her head. “No angel. Never. You could never mess up one of our snuggles by asking to be a part of it. We’re both so proud of you, for calling and getting help.”
“P-promise?” You asked.
Natasha held out her pinky, which you wrapped with your own. “Promise.” She confirmed.
Wanda finally got your shoes off and placed them on the floor next to the bed. “Okay little love,” she announced, easing your pajama pants down around your knees. “I’m gonna get some of the nice lotion again, okay?” She’d already put a little on earlier, but she figured it would probably do quite a bit to soothe your current pains, both physically and emotionally.
You wrapped yourself around her, refusing to let her move. You didn’t need silly lotion, you needed her. You whined at the prospect of having to let go.
Natasha giggled and sat down next to Wanda. “Do you want me to do your lotion while you hang onto mommy?”
You nodded, sending her into the next room. Wanda kissed your temple. “I told you she likes you.”
“I’m so spoiled,” you mumbled blissfully into her neck.
“You deserve it, angel,” she said.
Natasha returned to the room with the bottle of lotion. She approached you and rubbed your back gently. “Alright little angel, is it okay if I touch your bottom, or do you want mommy to do that part?”
You pondered for a moment. On one hand, having Wanda do it would mean getting to lay over her lap again. But, you found yourself inexplicably excited by the thought of Natasha putting your lotion on. Maybe, if you played your cards right, you could have the best of both worlds.
“You can do it, Miss Natasha,” you said while flipping yourself over to lay over Wanda’s lap.
“Oh,” Wanda squeaked in pleasant surprise. From this position she could’ve just as easily applied the lotion. She was pleased to know that you wanted Natasha to do it, though. She pulled up your shirt and rubbed your back.
“Okay, it’s gonna be a little cold,” Natasha advised, giggling a little bit when you jumped at the cool liquid anyway. Her hands were so gentle as she soothed your raw skin. You wondered if she was this gentle with her subs as well. “All done. Do you want a kiss?”
You nodded, feeling so completely at ease with the two women taking care of you. Natasha placed a gentle kiss to each of your red ass cheeks.
“Does Tasha’s kisses make it feel all better?” Wanda asked.
You nodded into Wanda’s thigh.
“I’m glad I could help,” Natasha giggled, placing the lotion on Wanda’s nightstand so it’d be ready for you again in the morning. She crawled back into bed, making herself comfortable on her side.
Wanda placed you face down on her own side of the bed, trying not to disturb you too much as she slid her legs out from under your body. She crawled over you, placing herself in the middle between you and Natasha, pulling you tight into her side.
You laid your head on her chest, catching a glimpse of Natasha’s pretty smile in the low lighting. She really didn’t look like she minded you being here at all. In fact, she looked happy.
In your fuzzy haze, you waved at her from across the bed.
Wanda and Natasha both giggled, hearts swelling at the innocence of the gesture. You just wanted Natasha to feel included, and what better way to acknowledge her presence than with a kind wave hello.
Natasha waved back. “Hi, little angel,” she said, reaching over Wanda to pinch your cheek.
You looked up at Wanda, your big eyes gently pleading. “Mommy, do you think I could sleep on your other side so I can be closer to Miss Natasha?”
Wanda smiled giddily. She never expected such a request from you, but she was more than happy to oblige. She was overjoyed to see your relationship with Natasha growing. “Of course, sweet girl,” she said, effortlessly flipping you over to her other side.
“You know, you don’t have to call her Miss Natasha,” Wanda said. You’d always called her that since you’d first met her without any prompting to do so. She certainly didn’t mind, but Wanda had always secretly hoped you’d get past the formality. There was nothing she wanted more than for her two favorite people to love each other as much as she loved them. “I bet she’d like it if you called her daddy. Only if you wanted to.”
You faced Natasha, who looked surprised at the proposal, but nodded.
“I thought only your subs were allowed to call you that?” You said, equally shocked by Wanda’s words.
“Hmm…” she pretended to ponder the question. “For my little angel I think I can make an exception.”
You smiled. “In that case,” you pressed a small kiss to her cheek. “Goodnight daddy.” You turned back to Wanda, placing a kiss on her jaw as you snuggled back into her chest. “Goodnight mommy. I love you.”
“Sweet dreams, little angel,” Natasha said, wrapping herself up behind you.
“Get some rest, little love,” Wanda said, kissing your head.
And finally, the pendulum stopped swinging.
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