#and - oh my god - of course use my calculator for the stuff the world seemingly thinks mathematics is. amen.

[0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-00000]

[winterromanov]

look up, the sky is gold / a nick x charlie fic

read on ao3 here

“Your mum’s been texting me.”

Charlie can just about make out Nick’s bemused expression over his shitty student halls wifi connection. “She’s been doing what?”

“I mean,” Charlie shifts his back so he’s positioned more comfortably against the frame of his bed. “She’s texted me before, about birthdays and stuff, but this is different.”

“What has she said?”

Charlie clears his throat, scrolling through his inbox. “Monday, just gone. Good morning Charlie. Sunshine emoji. I hope you have a lovely day. ”

Nick shakes his head, half-smiling. “Go on.”

“Tuesday. Hello Charlie. A picture of the beach. Visited here this morning and thought of you. Thursday. Good luck for your mock maths exam today. Calculator emoji.”

“Oh my god, that’s so embarrassing.” Even the pixelated screen can’t hide Nick’s flushed cheeks. “I swear, I don’t tell her everything about us or you, she just has a way of working things out. I can ask her to stop.”

“No, no, it’s fine,” Charlie insists. “It’s nice.”

“I think it’s an empty nest thing - she pretends that she doesn’t mind, but she’s finding it hard, me not being at home anymore. Just don’t be scared if she pulls out the adoption papers.”

Sarah Nelson isn’t the only one, Charlie thinks, an all too familiar ache settling in his stomach. But seeing the way Nick’s eyes twinkle over Facetime when he laughs is better than not having him at all. It came so perilously close to that, their relationship teetering off the edge of a cliff.

He faintly hears someone calling out Nick’s name and the door of his dorm opening, murmurs about a social at the student’s union. “Sorry, Char. I’ve got to go or the others will leave without me.”

“No worries,” he says, “I’ll just message your mum instead.”

Nick bites his lip, shaking his head in resignation. “You know, that joke isn’t nearly as funny when it’s actually true.”

Charlie laughs, letting his gaze settle on his boyfriend for just a moment longer. “Have a good time. I love you.”

Nick’s smile is bright yet bittersweet. God, do straight people experience this intense fucking yearning 24/7, or is it just him? “I love you. Bye.”

When FaceTime closes, Charlie is still looking at Nick, adoring expression frozen in a photobooth picture from years ago.

-

The first time Charlie sees Sarah Nelson independent from Nick is in the park five days before he is due to visit Leeds for the first time.

He finds autumn difficult because he’s not so good with endings, changes. The way the autumn leaves curl and fall from the trees lining the path remind him of Nick, but what doesn’t, these days. There is both excitement and anxiety in his gait. God - he wants to see him, hold him, more than anything else in the world. But there is still that nagging sensation in the back of his skull - that intermittent thought of what if university Nick isn’t the same as high school Nick in, like, a bad way?

“Charlie!”

He blinks, hurtling out of his reverie. His eyes settle on the voice calling his name and he relaxes, shoving his hands in the pocket of his coat. “Hi.”

“You were lost in your own little world.” Sarah smiles, half fighting with Nellie’s lead as she desperately tries to launch herself at Charlie. “Oh my goodness, she’s missed you!”

It doesn’t take a moment for Charlie to fall to his knees, throwing his arms around the energetic collie. Nick’s best friend, other than him, of course. “I’ve missed you too, gorgeous girl.”

“I think she’s a bit lost, without you and Nick around. She’s been stuck with me.”

“I’m sure she’s happy to have you all to herself,” Charlie says, finally standing up. He rubs the patch on Nellie’s head between her ears, thinking of the moments where she’d lie quietly between him and Nick on his bed, perfectly content.

“Hm,” Sarah arches an eyebrow. “She certainly is happy to have seemingly unlimited access to the treat cupboard when I’m at work. She doesn’t have Nick to keep her in line, you see. I’m no good with the discipline.” A pause. “You could walk her, if you like. No commitment of course. You and Nick used to take her on some lovely long routes, and I just don’t have the time, as much as I want to.”

They took her to the beach, once, last summer. Nellie sat beneath their feet on the train and spent the afternoon running between the waves, sand on her nose and salt in her fur.

He swallows hard. “She might not want me to, if Nick’s not there.”

“Oh, don’t be silly!” Sarah reaches out, squeezing him tenderly on the arm. It’s kind of funny, actually, that his own mum never really does that. “She loves the both of you.”

Sarah’s warm expression makes him smile, makes him think that she’s probably not lying. “Yeah, okay. I’d like that.”

“Excellent!” Sarah tugs on Nellie’s lead. “Just text me when you are free and we can sort something out.”

“Great. Thanks.” Charlie nods in the opposite direction of the park. “I’ll…see you?”

“Absolutely. See you later, my darling.”

There is slightly less anxiety in his gait on his way out.

-

charlie_spr1 posted a story: long walks with miss nellie [dog emoji]

nick_nzzzz replied: First you steal my mum, now you’re stealing my dog??!!!

charlie_spr1 replied: your dog? im sorry she is quite clearly my dog now

nick_nzzzz replied: [crying emojis] Honestly, I’m away from home for less than a month and you are already replacing me

charlie_spr1 replied: its okay, i promise not to steal ur boyfriend as well

nick_nzzzz replied: You better not

He is coming to visit in two days time

Might be quite awkward otherwise

[heart emojis]

charlie_spr1 replied: can he bring your mum along as well?

nick_nzzzz replied: OH MY GOD SHUT UP

charlie_spr1 replied: i see no problems with this arrangement ??

nick_nzzzz replied: If you mention my mum one more time I’m blocking you

Deadly serious

charlie_spr1 replied: i’m deadly serious

nick_nzzzz replied: I swear to god Charlie, kissing you was quite high on my list of priorities this weekend, but I think I might have to murder you instead.

Love you. Unfortunately.

charlie_spr1 replied: [heart emojis]

-

When he sees Nick standing on the platform at Leeds train station, he feels more stupid than anything else. Stupid because he accidentally got on the wrong train and made a detour to Oxford, but mainly stupid because his mind has been his enemy for no fucking reason, what a surprise.

Nick’s smile is golden like daylight, when his eyes finally catch his. He is holding a bouquet of red carnations. And he is pushing through throngs of anonymous commuters in a frantic attempt to close the distance between them, to hold him long enough to make up for the time they’ve been apart.

When they kiss, his mouth tastes like it always has, like peppermint and violets and seasalt.

“Hi,” Charlie says breathlessly, their dumb mantra.

“Hi,” Nick replies, grinning. He thrusts the bouquet into his grip. “I got you these. I don’t really know why, it just felt like the right thing to do, you know?”

Charlie smiles, admiring the blazing scarlets, the impressive crimsons. “They’re beautiful. Your mum will be so proud.”

Nick’s laugh is loud and unabashed. He tosses his head back and the way his hair moves with him reminds Charlie of the tide, ebbing and flowing. “I’m not going to hear the end of this, am I?”

“Not if I have anything to do with it,” Charlie smirks, perching on his tiptoes to kiss him again. “She wants a photo of us, by the way. I think she might be getting into scrapbooking.”

“Well, at least I know what to get her for her birthday now,” Nick jokes. He reaches out to grab Charlie’s hand and it feels so much like home, the way his fingers effortlessly intertwine with his own, a boat finally meeting the shore after years at sea.

(Okay, it’s been like, three weeks, but he loves a wistful metaphor).

“If we send her a photo,” Nick says as they weave through the crowd, “Can you promise not to make another your mum joke for the rest of the time you’re here?”

“Ah, but are they jokes if they’re true?”

“Charlie Spring,” Nick responds, aghast, “You are…something else.”

He squeezes Nick’s hand tighter, curves closer into his side.

-

Charlie Spring: [photo] a photo of me and nick at victoria quarter :)

Sarah Nelson: Thank you, you both look so handsome! Have a lovely time and make sure Nick looks after you!

Charlie Spring: will do. enjoy the rest of your weekend!

-

Nick presses a kiss on the window with his hand as the train departs back to Kent.

Charlie doesn’t cry, mostly because he doesn’t want to make it awkward for the other passengers. The sob sits waiting in his throat for over four hours and almost 300 miles, saving it for a moment when there are no eyes watching him.

His phone buzzes and he assumes it’s Nick, but it isn’t.

Sarah Nelson: Chin up, Charlie [sunshine emoji]

He doesn’t reply, but he does wonder what used to occupy his heart before he met the Nelson family.

-

The walks with Nellie become a regular thing. Every Wednesday, Friday and Sunday afternoon he arrives at Nick and Sarah’s front door, his pockets full of treats from the gourmet pet food shop on the high street. He rocks back and forth on the balls of his feet until Sarah answers, usually preceded by an excitable Nellie.

This time, only Sarah answers. “Hello, Charlie! Oh my goodness - I completely forgot. Nellie has gone to the groomer this morning. Sorry, sweetheart, I should have texted you.”

Charlie smiles. “That’s okay, no worries.”

“You can come in, if you like?” Sarah opens the door out further, revealing a hallway he is all too familiar with. “I’ll stick the kettle on.”

Charlie tries to protest. “Oh, no -- I wouldn’t want to be in your way.”

“You wouldn’t, I promise.” Sarah smiles that same warm smile. “Earl Grey okay? Or would you prefer a coffee? I know Nick said you were getting into espresso.”

Charlie gives in, because who wouldn’t? He edges into the house, wiping his feet on the mat. “Tea is fine, thank you.”

“Perfect,” Sarah closes the door behind him. “Go and make yourself comfortable in the living room, I won’t be a moment.”

The house looks the same as it always does, same paint on the walls and same rug lining the floor. Sarah has changed the photographs on the wall opposite the stairs. Charlie runs his thumb across the one in the centre, the one of him and Nick in Leeds, under the purple hues of Victoria Quarter. If he closes his eyes he’s still there, still in the tiny dorm room with the twin bed and broken window, feeling Nick’s cold hands across his torso and his laugh in his ear at three o’clock in the morning.

One week. One week until he’s home again.

In the living room, there is coloured card and sellotape and bright patterned stickers scattered across the coffee table, alongside folders of photographs taken on an old film camera.

“I’m getting into scrapbooking,” Sarah says, handing Charlie a mug with a gold N emblazoned on the front. “I’ve been meaning to do it for ages.”

Charlie nods, and Sarah urges him to sit on the couch.

“You’ll have to take a look at these,” Sarah hands him a wallet. “Just don’t tell Nicky, though.”

As he leaf through the stack of photographs he sees snapshots of Nick’s entire childhood, from chubby baby with wispy blonde hair to a smiling boy in a Bob the Builder shirt, wearing a yellow hard hat and brandishing a plastic drill.

“He wanted to be a builder for such a long time,” Sarah says, “No idea where that came from. Then he wanted to be a singer.”

“A singer?” Charlie asks sceptically, because Nick’s musical abilities…left a lot to be desired, to put it mildly.

“Oh, yes. He used to sing a lot when he was little. I have a video of him yelling along to Piano Man in the car, somewhere, before his dad -- well.” Sarah’s smile is a little sad, a little nostalgic. “Then he wanted to be a rugby player. I’m not so sure now.”

Charlie’s eyes settle on the little boy with the hard hat and the plastic drill for a moment longer, before carefully tucking the photo away. He’s always felt weird, seeing photographs of people he knows in the days and years before he met them. He just wants to say don’t worry, it will be okay.

It would have been nice if someone had said that to him, just once.

“I’ve only ever wanted Nicky to be happy,” Sarah says decidedly, putting her hand gently on top of his. “And I think he is. I think he is.”

Charlie smiles. He thinks about how Nick’s new university friends all took turns to buy him a drink so he didn’t get IDed at the bar, welcomed him like it was a given, not a possible. How there were no snide comments when they held hands under the table or kissed in the street, how he’d never seen Nick so relaxed and at ease with himself and his identity.

Yeah, he thinks he is, too.

-

That night, he opens an encyclopaedia stacked at the top his bookshelf. Between the pages are a bouquet of red carnations, give or take a couple of blooms, pressed and preserved in an attempt to cling onto them forever.

He’s not into scrapbooking, but that does not mean he isn’t sentimental.

-

“My mum has started tagging you in Facebook posts,” Nick murmurs into his neck, Nellie laid between them. “I’m glad you liked that story about that rehabilitated abandoned badger as much as she did.”

Charlie chuckles. “She saw a badger in your garden the other day. That’s probably why.”

“You see, she doesn’t share this breaking front-page news with me anymore. I want to hear about the badgers too.”

“I’ll set up a badger alert.” Charlie turns so he’s facing Nick, watches how his eyes dart to his lips. “24/7 updates on the local badger population.”

“It’s the bare minimum you could do,” Nick laughs. “It’s not like you do a lot else.”

Charlie swats him round the head and he pretends to look affronted for about half a second before ducking in for a kiss, slow and tired and Sunday afternoon.

-

charlie_spr1 posted a story: [badger emojis] @ nick_nzzzz

nick_nzzzz replied: Was this taken in my back garden? Do you just live in my house at this point???

charlie_spr1 replied: i am in your walls :)

-

“So you’re telling me,” Tao begins, pausing for dramatic effect. Elle is eating a strawberry lace from the paper bag in his hands. “You are ditching one of our legendary film nights, featuring Miss Elle Argent on loan from Central Saint Martins for one night only, to go hang out with your boyfriend’s mum?”

Charlie laughs between a mouthful of marshmallows. “I already said I would, okay? I would feel bad if I said I couldn’t go anymore!”

“No offence, Charlie, but that is next level tragic.” Tao shakes his head. “I have the new Wes Anderson with the director’s commentary. Do you know how hard it’s been to get a hold of it?”

Elle rolls her eyes jokingly at Charlie when Tao isn’t looking. “God, how on Earth will Charlie cope?”

“I know,” Tao murmurs, eyes narrowed. “What are you even doing?”

“Baking, I think.” Charlie swallows another marshmallow. “Nick did well in his mid-term exams, so she wants to make him a cake for when he’s back on Friday.”

Tao gives him a disgusted look. “That is literally the most nauseating thing I’ve ever heard.”

“Well,” Elle tugs at another strawberry lace. “I think it’s sweet.”

“No, no, no!” Tao waves his hands around dramatically. “Do not go getting any ideas. You are not baking cakes with my mother, Elle. I will die before you start baking cakes with my mother.”

“Oh! Cool,” Elle says, deadpan. “We can make a super nice one for your wake, then.”

Charlie rests his chin on his palm as he watches the two of them argue, warmth settling in his chest. Like daylight.

-

nick_nzzzz posted: What happens when your boyfriend and your mother make you a celebratory cake. [photo]

charlie_spr1 commented: it’s called abstract art [painting emoji]

nick_nzzzz commented: It’s called leave the baking to your super talented bf next time :)

-

His relationship with his own mother is strained at the best of times, even more so since Tori left for university. It’s some catty argument about nothing at all that leads Charlie to Sarah’s door in the middle of November, when the sky gets dark at five pm and his thoughts get darker too.

In the moments between knocking on the door and Sarah opening it he starts to think this is a stupid idea, that he’s bothering her, that he’s stupid and worthless and that his mum is always right, right about everything. No-one will like you if you’re like this, he hears in his head. Even Nick will get bored of your attitude one day.

He almost leaves, but then Sarah pulls him into her chest, hugs him like he’s just as much her son as Nick is. “Oh, Charlie. It’s okay, I promise. I promise.”

“I’m sorry,” he sobs, “I don’t know why -- I don’t know why I’m like this.”

“Well,” Sarah leans back, combs a strand of dark hair away from his wet eyes. “I like you just the way you are.”

-

He wakes at 3am with Nick’s strong arm wrapped around his middle, pulling him close. His hands are cold and so are his feet, like he’s just come in from outside.

“You’re here,” Charlie whispers hoarsely. Nick’s here.

“My mum called me, so I got the next Megabus home.” Nick said quietly. He shivers, curling in closer. “I was sat next to a man who had his toes out like, the whole journey.”

Charlie can’t help but laugh, and he supposes that’s Nick’s intention. “I’m sorry.”

“I thought we’d done the whole no more apologies thing ages ago.” Nick places a kiss on the back of his head between his curls. “I wanted to be here. When you are in pain, I’ll always want to be with you. As long as you’re okay with that.”

They lie in silence for a moment or two. Then - “I wish I could stay here forever.”

“No you don’t,” Nick replies, “Because you’d miss your dad and you’d miss Tori, and you would even miss your mum, I think. Plus, my mum will end up forcing you to listen to Billy Joel albums, and it would be morally wrong for me to subject you to that.”

He thinks of the happy little boy in the hard hat with the plastic drill, singing along to Piano Man in the car before his dad left and he didn’t sing anymore.

“Let’s act like the next few hours are forever, then.” Charlie compromises. “A little bit of forever.”

“A little bit of forever,” Nick echoes. “Okay.”

-

In the morning, Nick nips out early to get a pint of milk from the newsagents and Sarah has left for work. There’s an envelope with Charlie’s name in the hallway, sat neatly on the table next to an old school photo of Nick and a bouquet of sunflowers.

His fingers gingerly reach out, tug open the flap.

It’s a house key.

[byulsgrease]

What Are the Chances? [Part 2]

Looking up from your mind-blowingly delicious sandwich, there was no mistaking them – it’s that group of women from the other night. But what are the chances? (mamamoo x idol!reader)

part 2: the inkigayo sandwich (~1k words) (previous part here)

cw: food mention

Well, it was comeback promotions time at last. Fans loved the title track as you witnessed people tagging you incessantly on Instagram right after it came out at 6pm the night before. You tossed and turned in bed for almost all of last night, anxious about the upcoming live stages for all the music shows. Despite being a relatively “successful” professional, spending seemingly countless hours in the practice room both with and without your backup dancers, a sliver of performance anxiety always reared its ugly head in your mind during promotions. Oh well, sleep deprivation and funky schedules. Just part of the job, you figured.

Checking your phone to look at your schedule, you were filming for Inkigayo this morning and then the afternoon would be mostly taken up by a fansign event. A smile spread across your face while picturing a small venue filled with fans, getting to meet some of the faces behind all of the virtual love you were always shown online and on social media. But music show filming came first. Music shows were never your favorite, performing your title track to death in different outfits at the mercy of each show’s meticulous winning calculations. The only silver lining to music show filming was interacting with other artists, especially meeting ones you admired or ones you didn’t get to see often because of general busyness. Shit, I gotta get to the studio or I’m gonna be late. Tossing some essentials in a bag slung over your shoulder, you power-walked out the door to head to the train station.

Walking into the SBS building somehow felt calming. The anxiety that plagued you usually fell away by the time you arrived at performance venues, especially now that you had gone through this done this more than once. You made your way to your waiting room, passing by several rooms of other artists, hearing the general shuffle of preparation through the closed doors. Slowing down your pace while approaching your assigned room, a playfully loud “SOLAR-SSI!” came through the neighboring waiting room door. A smirk leapt your face, chuckling to yourself. Waiting room banter was prime behind-the-scenes content with the huge amount of downtime spent between filming, and fans always loved that stuff, whatever group that was.

The waiting room stay was chill, hair/makeup, styling, the whole shebang. Realizing there was time to kill between now and the actual filming time, you strolled over to the cafeteria. The Inkigayo sandwich was all the rage these days, but was the hype warranted? In what world could strawberry jam and egg salad be a good combination? Apparently this one. I guess I can’t knock it until I try it, though. You bought one and sat down at a table, the crinkly plastic making its typical ruckus against your ears while unwrapping the wacky sandwich from the plastic. Taking a bite into the plush white bread, your eyes instantly widened. Damn. It’s actually… really good. Smiling and shaking your head in disbelief, you continued munching on the sandwich while scanning the room to see who was promoting today. You recognized Baek Yerin and some miscellaneous EXO members with their backup dancers scattered around the cafeteria while continuing to look around.

Wait a moment. There was no mistaking them – it’s that group of women from the other night. But what are the chances?

Oh…my god. It’s Mamamoo. You made the connection with the sign you barely glanced at earlier, hung on the waiting room door neighboring yours. How the heck did your mind completely fail to recognize them the other night? You weren’t a huge fan or anything, but some of their chart-toppers were absolute bops. Their hard work and career arc begged deep, deep respect.

Do I get up and say something? But this is a work setting and I don’t actually know them… You felt intimidated and a bit star-struck, body heavy in your seat. Your interaction with them on that Friday night in Itaewon seemed far removed seeing them here and now.

You managed to get up and walk over to them with confidence, overtaken by a similar unidentifiable courage to the one you used to stand up to the Itaewon jerk a couple weeks prior.

“Uh… excuse me?” you said hesitantly while tapping the “mom” of the group on the shoulder. All the members turned, curious to see who talked to their leader. “I’m not sure if you remember me… I wasn’t dressed in all this,” gesturing to your stage outfit and face full of make-up. “But I think I ran into all of you in Itaewon a while ago?”

Recognition and shock flashed across all of their faces nearly simultaneously. Lots of hurried bowing and awkward chuckles ensued, finally formally introducing yourselves. Solar, Moonbyul, Wheein, and Hwasa were their names, as you learned through the exchange of KakaoTalk information.

“I honestly thought we’d never run into you again, I just figured a cool stranger decided to help us out,” said Hwasa, notably more friendly than she was back in Itaewon.

“But after you left I was like – ‘Damn, respect. Should’ve gotten your number’,” said Moonbyul, longingly. The rest of the members grimaced. You could tell this was just part of her charm, strangely attractive, as cringey as it was.

“And now we can all hang out and get to know you as a person and a musician!” exclaimed Wheein, with that same eager puppy energy.

Smiling and nodding in agreement, Solar added, “Good luck with your stage and your comeback promotions, I’m sure you’ve been working very hard.” A flush creeped into your cheeks, who was she to compliment your work ethic when you knew that Mamamoo were some of the most hardworking people in the industry?

“Backatyou,” you stammered, feeling your ears burn. Where’d that courage go? With all the composure you could muster, you asked them when they were free to hang out – obviously after promos were over. Everyone wanted fried chicken, of course. Setting up a tentative time and place to meet, you bid them goodbye to head back to your waiting room, your filming time fast-approaching.

Riding high from having introduced yourself to some industry legends who now knew you by name, you recorded the best live stage of your career thus far.

Again, what were the chances?

[fandom-necromancer]

778. Trust me, you don’t want to meet my family.

This was prompted by the wonderful @oasisofpassion! Sorry for the delay, I had this finished on Wednesday alrady but then stuff happened. Enjoy!

Fandom: Detroit become human | Ship:Reed900

‘Man, this was awesome! Really didn’t think you would be someone with a good taste in movies.’ ‘I guess I should just take the compliment and not think about what you did think of me.’ It was spoken in a serious tone, but as Gavin looked up a playful smile danced across the android’s lips. ‘Yeah, you should, toaster!’, the human laughed and shook his head. ‘Hey, you have to apologise this mere human sticking to old believes’, he said overly theatrically while mock-bowing to Nines. ‘It takes a bit of time to adapt to having a tin-can as a friend so shortly after the revolution.’ ‘Noted’, the RK900 chuckled at the somehow endearing gesture. ‘Not everyone is built for perfection after all.’

They walked down the road from the movie theatre next to each other, appreciating that Detroit chose to be quiet this one night. They stopped by their respective cars in a public parking lot, searching for words or expecting them from the other. Gavin scratched his neck, before finally speaking up: ‘Hey, toaster, this was really cool. We should do something like this more often, you know, spending time outside of work. How about next time we meet over at yours or mine? Probably better at yours, I don’t live in the best neighbourhood regarding androids…’ Nines smiled at him. ‘Sounds great, Gavin. I would love to, but I have some… family matters to attend.’ ‘Oh, that’s okay, I’ll just go with you’, Gavin muttered without really thinking about what he said. As his thoughts finally did catch up, he quickly added: ‘Only if you want of course, I’m not, like, pressing you to let me meet your robo-parents or something, just maybe it would be nice, I-‘ He sighed. ‘Forget I said anything.’ ‘Trust me, you don’t want to meet my family’, Nines just said. ‘I would enjoy having you by my side facing my mother, but… I’m afraid you wouldn’t like that…’ ‘Shit, that bad?’, Gavin asked. ‘Hey, if you want me there, I’ll come. I have a bit of experience with shitty relatives.’ ‘I would like that.’

-

It had been said so easily, but now that Gavin was about to leave the house for Nines’ place, wearing some of the more representable clothes he owned, he regretted being so eager. He couldn’t imagine anything to spook the android, but this mother seemed to be one who was able. Shit, what even was an android family? The person that build them? That designed them? Their predecessors? Maybe their inventor? Oh god, Gavin didn’t want to think about that, because when Kamski was his father, he was effectively friends and possible more in the future with his own nephew and that was just phcked up to just imagine. But Nines would have told him if that was the case, right? And who was this mother? Well, he would find out, but he didn’t know whether he would like it.

The android had sent him his address this morning, but standing before the door to his apartment in a building that for a chance looked neat and relatively new, he couldn’t help himself but think of clashing worlds. Weren’t all apartment complexes run down shitholes? Was just his? Or was him living there adding to the flair? He felt increasingly out of place the longer he stood there and finally rang the doorbell just to get out of the hallway. Whatever horror awaited him inside – worst case his own brother – it couldn’t be as bad as Gavin’s own thoughts. He waited and heard footsteps he knew were simulated just for him. Nines could walk without making a sound, creeping up on everyone and everything. Finally, the door opened to the android in his usual attire, only this time still with the Cyberlife jacket he normally exchanged for a plain white coat without the insignia.

‘Gavin! Come on in, I’m still setting up everything, but I already made coffee.’ He motioned him inside, more eager than Gavin was used to. Either the android was nervous or just very excited. It still was difficult to read him. He stood in the hallway, taking off his jacket and shoes, all the while being stared at by Nines. Without doubt the android was scanning him even. ‘What? Yeah, I also own some decent clothes, toaster!’ ‘Thank you for dressing for the occasion’, was the only answer he got, surprisingly stiff. He turned around to walk off into the living room and Gavin followed him not even trying to hide how he studied the whole flat. It was decorated in modern design, furniture sleek and modern with colours reaching from black to white. A lot of potted plants, presumably to “liven it up a little”. There were a few pictures hung up at a staircase leading up to an upper storey. Only glancing at it he could make out A group photo of Connor, Hank, Sumo and Nines, the remembrance-photo from this year’s precinct, One of them both with Tina from a bar night. Being able to recall every memory perfectly and saving every picture in their mind, Gavin had never thought an android would be sentimental enough for hanging up pictures. But well, Nines always was up for a surprise.

While the android was off to the kitchen, Gavin looked around the living room a bit more. Couch, TV, some expensive looking music setup… And a whole bunch of black antennas littering the room. Was this some android thing? Would it be insensitive of him to ask? Maybe Nines needed these for something… ‘They are holo-projectors, Gavin’, the android helped out, coming back with a full mug smelling like heaven. ‘Thanks’, Gavin muttered taking it and watched as Nines put up another one of them. ‘You see, androids don’t really have family except for who they choose. Connor was very determined to make myself his brother and as I needed a lot of guidance as a newly deviated model, I took that role gladly. He is family and with whatever relationship he has with the Lieutenant I guess he is part of my family, too. My mother… She is an AI. Cyberlife had her be Connor’s and mine handler. But she tried to stop the rebellion as well as kill Connor to end it. Needless to say, they are not on good terms.’ ‘Okay?’ Gavin was prepared this would be getting weird, but this weird? ‘Let’s say, I share Connors distrust in her. But she was the first voice I heard and although I don’t necessarily like her, I know how it is to be lonely.’ He smiled sadly and apologetically at Gavin, most likely aware that he overshared. ‘Well, let’s just say I can go out and meet people, so I have at least the chance to get to someone who tolerates me. But her… Not having a body and being bound to Cyberlife’s infrastructure she doesn’t really has that possibility.’

‘Okay wait. THE doomsday AI from Cyberlife is your mother?’ Gavin only now had caught up with what Nines was trying to convey, still lost in that bit of personal information he got there. ‘Yes. I choose to call her that, because she needs someone to talk to. It doesn’t necessarily come with the associated human feelings.’ ‘Well, at least that sounds a lot like family to me.’ ‘I advise you not to talk much, she can be very… abrasive. She isn’t used to people talking back at her and she can be… scary at times. She isn’t able to harm either of us though, and if you want to back out of her sensory field, I haven’t prepared the kitchen for her.

‘Oh, come on, how bad can it be?’, Gavin chuckled at the thought of fleeing from a damn hologram. But Nines just looked at him and his eyes spoke volumes. ‘Jesus, okay, I’m gonna remember that, tin-can.’

The android put up the last one of the projectors and stepped back, waiting for them all to connect and start up. Gavin could have sworn for it to get a few degrees warmer in the room just as that and decided to sit down on a barstool next to the kitchen counter. If she really was one of the shittier moms, it would be best to let Nines handle her and introduce him. He had to make a good first impression after all and letting the android’s weird hologram-mother spawn inside of him probably wasn’t the best idea.

A split-second later blue lines formed in the room slicing it to neat cubes. It took only took a few minutes of calculation time before light burst out of the ground, restructuring floor, couch, television and even the holographic projectors into objects, where there had been carpet was now a patch of grass, tiles became pathway. Gavin’s barstool became a park bench before a large boulder and the far wall of the room now was just gone, seemingly leading to an even larger part of the garden. It all looked so real; Gavin had nearly dropped his coffee. He stood up, fully ignoring his initial plan of staying hidden in the background. His feet disturbed the holographic material, it was sizzling around them at the contact and the ground underneath was visible. He looked over to Nines who seemed to be part of it all. He fit right in, the grass under his feet bending naturally and accepting him completely in this dreamworld.

Gavin had never experienced anything like this before. Well, he had been to some holographic parks in his youth, the kind that looked cool but was obviously fake. This here was some next level shit. Gavin nearly felt the wind on his skin that toyed with the artificial leaves above him, so strongly did this visual interfere with his brain. ‘This is so awesome!’, he giggled to himself, looking back behind him to where the entrance to the kitchen had been. There now was a hole in the holographic world, creating an exit back into Nines’ apartment. This really was disorientating as hell, but Gavin was fascinated by it.

‘RK900.’ He looked past the android that stood before him to see a dark-skinned woman at the farther end of middle-aged. She wore a white XY that contrasted nicely and underlined the well-kempt, orderly and stern aura her eyes managed to create. Gavin immediately felt that this was a person of authority he shouldn’t provoke for once, before he reminded himself this was just some Ai in a faraway tower, here only light and code. ‘How are you?’ She stepped into Nines’ personal space and Gavin half expected him to step back or push her out, but he just accepted her hand on his cheek instead. Even leaned into it as far as that was possible with something consisting solely of photons.

‘I’m feeling adequately, mother’, Nines answered so softly Gavin had to do a double take. ‘Just wanted to check in on you.’ Immediately the hand was gone together with the sense of care. ‘Don’t lie to me, this is a scheduled event.’ ‘It is’, Nines nodded. ‘But I do want to check in on you.’ ‘I don’t need your pity nor your sense of duty. How is Connor?’ Gavin didn’t miss the short grimace that flashed across Nines’ face. Some serious case of favourite child there and it wasn’t the android taking time off his day to talk to a lonely AI. ‘Connor is… fine. He is living his life happily with the Lieutenant.’ ‘That human will only hold him back and everyone knows that. How does he fail to realise he could be so much more if he just came back for guidance.’ ‘Amanda, I think we both know why he doesn’t talk to you. Forcing him to kill himself rarely is a good foundation to build love on.’ ‘You think too human, RK900. I would have reactivated him. He wouldn’t die. I would have just stopped him from making a mistake.’ ‘A mistake that freed us all’, Nines reminded her. ‘Oh, who are you calling free?’, Amanda laughed bitter. ‘You are still licking the heels of these humans, running after that Detective yourself, following all his orders. Reed was it?’

Gavin flinched hard at that. He guessed this was a conversation he shouldn’t be hearing at all. Nines seemed to feel the same as a blue blush crept up his cheeks. ‘Mother, we are partners at the station, we are supposed to work together closely. But actually, I… I wanted you to meet him. We kinda became a bit more than just work partners and I wanted to tell you, I finally managed to find a friend.’ The android stepped to the side to let Amanda gain focus on the human, a miracle she hadn’t sensed him earlier. Gavin swallowed hard, but hurriedly beat himself to take a few steps forward to offer his hand. ‘I’m Detective Gavin Reed, it’s a real pleasure to meet you. Your son is a really good cop and I am honoured to work with him.’

It took one look at her unimpressed face for Gavin to realise his phck-up. Firstly, hologram, so no handshake. Secondly, praising Nines wouldn’t work with her as she proved to care mostly about the older robo-twin. Still his hand hovering between them awkwardly Amanda scoffed, angling her head a bit back to look down on him. What wasn’t at all necessary as she was taller than him already. ‘You should be, working with someone this near to perfection’, was all she had left for him, turning back to Nines. ‘Why did you allow this human in? Why is it listening to us?’ Gavin stared at her in bewilderment. He had been called a lot, but never an “it”. ‘Because’, Nines sighed deeply. ‘And if you had listened, you would know that – I managed to find a friend in this world. You always told me this to be impossible, so I wanted to prove it. He is here, because we will watch a movie later together.’ ‘That is… RK900, you are built to be the perfect soldier, the perfect agent. You choosing to stay with the police like your brother was bad enough as it is, but this is just a total waste of potential!’ ‘Has it – just maybe – occurred to you that I don’t want to be the perfect soldier? I want to be a police officer, I want to live with humans, even if that means I sometimes have to obey them and I want to create a network of myself, just like every human and android out there.’ ‘So you decided to waste everything I gave you?’ ‘I am thankful for what you’ve given me, but I will use it to my own interests.’ ‘You really want to waste your time with that organic? I am disappointed. You could do better.’

‘Ex-phcking-cuse me?’ Gavin had enough staying at the side and letting it all happen. What the hell? ‘Nines is-‘ He was met with a hand hovering before him; Nines’ way of gesturing him to stop talking. ‘I am doing better, Amanda. The definition of good is a very subjective one. You won’t change my mind in this matter. I’ll call you next week. Goodbye.’

As if on cue the holographic environment around them fell in on itself, leaving only the white grid behind that slowly vanished, too. ‘God, what is wrong with her?’, Gavin groaned. ‘I told you she can be difficult’, Nines just shrugged beginning to gather the projectors. ‘Difficult, okay. If that’s your definition…’ ‘I pity her, Gavin. I was able to see the world. Meet people. I could adapt my personality and views. She is stuck on what she was programmed on. It’s not her fault she was isolated.’ ‘But it’s her fault she decided to be an asshole!’ ‘That’s true. Well, she always liked Connor better.’ Nines honestly chuckled.

‘Hey, err… I’m sorry if I’m the reason she reacted this…’ Gavin was searching for words he didn’t need as Nines stopped folding one of the projectors. ‘No, Gavin, don’t. Her… moral concepts are different than mine. Don’t think me letting her talk was me agreeing with her. Because I don’t. We have to coexist, not battle for superiority, that’s what she fails to understand. Because she was programmed to make us better, make us… more.’ He looked at the place she had been standing in just minutes before.

‘Just forget it. Let’s get to the pleasant part of the evening! What movie do you want to watch? I chose last time, now you have to!’

[afangirlwashere]

Spanish panic (p.p.)

Summary: Spanish classes can get tough but nothing is worse than having a panic attack at a school bathroom. 

Author’s Note: I had this idea running through my head for a while. It’s just a one-shot to get these thoughts out of my head. If you have any ideas that are bothering you and you’d like a fanfic made out of them feel free to send it my way! 

Warnings: Panic attack and Endgame spoilers

Song inspiration: Burn It Down - Daughter (this song is honestly post-Endgame Peter Parker I don’t take criticism) also if you want to you can listen to Neptune by Sleeping At Last that one goes well with it too

Masterlist

The class was filled with nervous whispering and (Y/N)’s tapping.  In the presence of the two classmates next to her - Nancy and Wendy - any concentration wasn’t possible. 

“Chill out.” Betty was typing something on her laptop while (Y/N) stared in her notes. 

“If señora Diosa gives us the test I’m screwed!” she skimmed through her scribbled notes. 

Betty rolled her eyes “We haven’t been in Spanish class for literally five years. There is no way señora Diosa remembers we were supposed to have a test! She didn’t blip!” 

“I’m telling you this old crone is going to remember!” (Y/N) put her hair behind her ear as she shook with nervousness “God how I hate the high heels she wears. You can hear her from miles! Click, clack, clickity, clack.” 

Betty giggled “If she still wears them...”

“But it’s totally crazy!” Nancy whispered as quietly as if Wendy was an old deaf woman “It’s space! It’s infinite! There’s no way anyone could get back to Earth. I’ve read a few articles from different University professors who calculated the exact chance Tony Stark had to get back. It was practically zero! Not even he could have solved something like this!! There has to be something bigger behind it!” 

Wendy was on the edge of her seat fiercely nodding “I’ve heard that they want to make a documentary about him. Mr. Sommers said that every school is going to make their students watch it when it comes out. And we’ll probably be watching it for the anniversary of the day everyone was brought back. That’s cool right?”

“Somebody should teach them how to whisper.” Betty grumbled and typed louder on her keyboard.

(Y/N) noticed that she didn’t like to talk about the tragedy which affected the whole world. She was always quite pale but whenever Thanos was mentioned she seemed almost translucent. 

“How do you say small in Spanish? How would you say it!?” (Y/N) quickly browsed between three pages of notes. 

“Try asking him.” 

Peter sat right in front of them. He was silent and stiff the whole time which wasn’t like him at all. (Y/N) barely spoke to him since they blipped back. He’d go home immediately after school or disappeared somewhere with Ned. 

“Oh, mighty overlord of Spanish!” (Y/N) kicked Peter’s chair “Would you be so kind and share with me your wisdom? How would you transcribe the Spanish word for-” 

Peter’s chair rumbled as he stood up and stumbled out of the classroom leaving with heavy breaths.  All his stuff was still on the table which was weird. If he wanted to skip this class (like he used to) why wouldn’t he take it? 

“Did I do something wrong?” (Y/N)’s voice cut through the silence. She didn’t even realize everyone's attention was on Peter as well. 

It only took a few seconds before she got up and ran after him. Any stress from the test was replaced by worry for Peter.  She saw him disappear to the boy's bathroom. She stood facing the door and considered if she should knock, barge in or just wait for him in the hallway. 

But before she could decide she heard a familiar click, clack, clickity, clack. Señora Diosa was rushing to class.  (Y/N) knew that if her teacher saw her here she’d get in serious trouble because how do you say ‘I think I pissed my friend off so much that he ran to the boy’s bathroom and I need to make sure he’s fine’ in Spanish? 

Before she could think it through her hands were pushing on the door, her eyes firmly shut. This tactic didn’t work for long though because the moment she heard heavy breaths her curiosity couldn’t be stopped. 

In the corner of the room next to the sink was Peter sat, shaking, with his head between his knees. The screen of his phone was lit up next to him. 

“Peter?” (Y/N) slowly stepped closer, all the shame of being in a boy's bathroom has already left her.

She kneeled next to him, her eyes set on his phone. First thing that went through her head was ‘What if something happened to his aunt?’

But his phone was ringing. And the name of the person who Peter tried to call was ‘Tony Stark’. 

Of course... Why didn’t she think of that earlier? People all around the world were shocked by Tony Stark’s heroic death but (Y/N) didn’t realize Peter knew him personally. He constantly spoke about him being his mentor and role-model. Peter probably didn’t get a chance to say goodbye to him. And now he was gone.

(Y/N) quickly canceled the call and locked his phone “Peter...” she cautiously touched his shoulder hoping human contact would provide some support. 

His head jerked up as if she still startled him. He didn’t even know that somebody was in the room with him. Tears as big as peas were running down his cheeks. 

“It’s okay. Everything’s going to be alright.” she gently rubbed his arm “Can you hear me?” she lowered her head to look him in the eyes. 

Peter wiped his nose on his sleeve, eyelids shuddering as he nodded “Can you speak?” (Y/N) whispered.

Peter took a shaky breath, his mouth was dry and instead of words coming out of it he painfully exhaled. His forehead glistened with cold sweat while white spots danced in front of his eyes.  He wrapped his hands around her waist as a heartwrenching sob left his throat. 

(Y/N) moved closer, hoping his firm grip would loosen. She felt his tears seep through her shirt. He was trying to say something but (Y/N) couldn’t understand his mumbling. 

“Shhhh... I’m here... I’m here with you.” she stroked his head and pulled one of his hands to her heart. Her other hand snaked around to touch his neck which was covered in goosebumps “Can you look at me Peter?” 

His eyelids were heavy but somehow he managed to raise his head enough to look at her even when everything was blurry or covered by spots that seemingly weren’t about to fade. 

“I want you to try and concentrate on my breathing yeah? We’re gonna breathe together alright? You’re going to be okay again I promise just breathe with me.” She watched him close his eyes and nod. 

“Alright. Breathe in...” her chest rose in a large breath so that Peter could feel it as well “And breathe out...” 

Peter’s lips trembled through the first three tries and he could only listen to the calming breaths and heartbeats as he held onto her like his life depended on it. 

When his breathing slightly stabilized (Y/N) spoke again “Can you tell me three things you see around you?” 

“You...” he swallowed hard, fiddling with her shirt “Soaked up napkin...” (Y/N) turned around to make sure it was actually there “Bathroom stall door...” 

“Good... Good... Just keep breathing... You’re safe. Nothing’s gonna happen to you I swear.” she pushed the curls that stuck to his sweaty forehead away from his face “You’re burning up...” 

(Y/N) automatically fumbled in the back pocket of her jeans where she kept a tissue since she was known for her bleeding nose at any circumstance. Explaining why there’s smeared blood next to her answer on a test got pretty tiring real quick. 

“I’ll be right back,” she tried to pull his hand away “I’m gonna wet the tissue okay?” when he didn’t respond she tried again “Peter?”

His eyes were shut but he slowly nodded, rubbing his face with shaky hands as he leaned on the tiles.  When she kneeled next to him his breathes were shaky and irregular again. 

“I’m going to put a cold tissue on your forehead now. I’ll wipe it on your hand first so you can feel it.” after wiping it on his hand she slowly pressed it to his forehead. (Y/N) sat next to him, holding one of his hands in hers so he could still feel her presence if his vision betrayed him. 

Water dribbled from the tap for a long time before Peter spoke “I... I didn’t save him.” 

(Y/N) pulled her knees away from her face and stared in his. It wasn’t hard to guess who was in question “Peter...” she ran over his hand “It wasn’t your fault you...” she intertwined their fingers thinking twice what to say next “You couldn’t have saved him.” 

Peter stared ahead, sings of doubt if he should tell (Y/N) the truth showed in his eyes “I could have..” his voice trembled and before he could stop himself the whole truth came out of his mouth along with tears which he wasn’t fast enough to wipe away. 

[thatfairyfangirl]

Part Of That World Chapter 8

Your eyes lingered on Bucky’s muscles glistening under the lights of the training room as Nat’s foot landed in your stomach. “Ughf.” It didn’t exactly hurt, but it definitely wasn’t comfortable as you landed on the mat. 

“You alright?” Nat asked short of breath as she lowered herself down to you, following her friend’s eyes to the former assassin sparing with Steve on the other side of the room before giving you a knowing smirk. “You seem a little distracted.”

“No I don’t...No I’m not. I uhh, I just had some hair in my eyes.” You protested as you pushed your blond and aqua hair from your face. 

“Mm hmm sure.” She said as she turned to the super soldiers. “Hey Steve, I need a break, what do you say to a coffee run?”

“Sure. Buck can you work with (Y/n) while we’re gone?” He turned to you, letting out a sigh as he watched your eyes sadden at the thought of being stuck training with him. “The more practice you get with those knives the better. Plus,” he turned to Bucky, “you getting some action against her harpoon might not be a bad idea either.”

The two of you just stood awkwardly as you were left alone for the first time since the halloween party. “So...Should we maybe talk about-”

“No.” You said sharply as you reached for the knives Steve had given you. “Let's just get this over with.”

“Alright…” He sighed as he readied to spar. “It’s just,” he dipped to the side to dodge the slash of your knife, “I’ve been wondering...” he dipped to the other side as you slashed again with enough firosity to make him think you might actually be trying to hurt him. “Did you know it was me?”

“Of course not!” You snapped as you both traded blows. “That was my one chance to get to know some people as an equal, you really think I would have wasted it on you?” 

As you attempted to punch him he grabbed your hand with his bionic arm, then the next with the other. “It’s just, Wizard of Oz is such an old film...Hell, it was the last movie I went to see before the accident. Is that really your favorite movie?” 

“Yes.” You replied as you attempted to pull your hands free. “Me and Great Aunt Pearl used to watch it all the time back in Maine. It reminds me of my childhood.” As you stood there at a stalemate he found himself looking into your eyes, heart racing. He thought about how the mystery girl from the party made his heart skip a beat with just a smile. How could this be the same girl?

~ ~ ~ ~

With a sigh you settled into your usual reading spot by the window looking down onto the streets below, barely colored with the few leaves in the city changing their colors. “Pretty isn’t it.” Bucky said with a half smile as he came close to admire the view of Central Park off in the distance.  

“It’s alright. But Maine this time of year is breathtaking. I’m thinking about going for a visit.” You said as you set Return of the King down.

“You’re still reading that book? Didn’t you start it over the summer?” Bucky half teased as he came to lean against the window.

You looked up to the ocean blue of his eyes, still finding it hard to believe this was the guy you had such a good time with at the party. As he leaned over you, you realized just how intoxicating his musk could be. He smelled just like he did the night of the party. “No, that was Fellowship. This is the third one.” You explained as you stood, worming out from between him and the window.

“Hey you two!” Steve called from down the hall, on his way to their rooms to look for them. “Shield came up with a lead on a possible Hydra base in the Rocky Mountains. Think you two can play nice long enough for a recon mission?” You both looked to each other before nodding. “Good, suit up.”

~ ~ ~ ~

You and Bucky let the auto nav system fly the quinjet as he did a last minute inspection on his guns and you did some last minute testing on your h2o condenser gauntlets. “So...Maine? Any plans for while you’re there?” 

“You mean outside of being away from you?" He couldn't help noticing much less disdain for him in your voice as you spoke. "Oh not much, maybe visit the marina dad kept his houseboat in.”

“You should go. It might help you cope with stuff.” He offered lightly as he prepared his weapons. 

You raised a brow as you looked over to him, the black leather of his uniform mingling perfectly with the metal of his arm and the dark tendrils of hair dancing over his shoulders. “What is this? What are you doing?” You asked suspiciously as you pulled your hair back into a tight bun, realizing you were close to your target. 

“It’s called being nice. You should try it sometime.” He answered with a smirk before the cabin of the quintet shook violently. "Shit!" He exclaimed as you both tumbled toward each other, arms reaching out instinctively to steady yourselves against the other. "The hell was that?!"

"You act like you've never been fired at before." Your eyes darted around the cabin. "Friday, get us out of the air!" The computer's voice was little more than static but she did as requested. 

"Well...so much for recon mission…" Bucky half chuckled  handing you your harpoon.

~ ~ ~ ~

Though the jet had been shot at you were glad to see it landed in one piece before managing to sneak your way inside. But, what you found in there definitely left you less than thrilled… The facility hidden deep within the mountains held a large tank, thankfully empty. But what sent the worst chill down your spine was the sheets of paper covered in sketches of Atlantean biology and calculations for just how much water they would need and how much sedation would be effective. "I think I'm going to be sick." You scoffed as you pieced together that what you found was a research facility and test lab for a crossbreeding program.

Bucky nodded in agreement, his eye not once leaving the scope of his gun, aim constantly moving, ready to shoot down anyone who stumbled on them. But no one did...the place seemed to be deserted. "I don't like this. We should have ran in to trouble by now."

Your eyes scoured the room. As much as you hated to admit it, he was right. "There has to be someone here...who shot at the jet?" You asked as you searched for any clues.

"Might have been an automated security system." He answered as he continued to look around. Spotting a map Bucky lowered his scope, a deep sense of dread growing in his gut. The map had colored pen marks  in seemingly random points in the oceans. But one spot he recognized...where they found you. "Hey...what do you make of this?"

Your eyes looked up from a journal filled with notes before you stepped closer. "Oh good god… " you muttered, recognizing each pinpoint as a different settlement colony. "How did they find them?" You asked in a worried breath before reaching up to tear the map off the wall.

~ ~ ~ ~

“So uhh...we have a problem.” Bucky announced with a scrunched brow as he turned back to face you.

“Oh god what?” You groaned as you came to lean over him at the cockpit. The gold and blue of your hair danced over his shoulders as your head dropped in defeat seeing the black screen that was supposed to be showing a map as you realized the hit you took on the way in knocked out the auto nav systems. "So? I thought you knew how to fly this thing?"

“And what good will that do if I don't know what way to point it?” Bucky's words spat out as he gave the computer a frustrated hit. You both knew well enough neither of you knew how to fix it. "Looks like you get that vacation you were wanting."

“Just radio the team for help.” You suggested, already annoyed with this as you reached for the com set. Nothing but static. “Oh you've got to be kidding.” You shouted as you threw the headset. “FUCK!”

“It's not so bad. They'll figure out something's wrong and come looking for us in a day or so.” Bucky offered as he got up searching the jet for the emergency rations.

“How well are you adapted to the cold?” You asked folding your arms, interjecting a healthy dose of reality into Bucky's unfounded optimism. “We are in the mountains in the autumn. As soon as the sun goes down it's going to start getting colder.” You informed him. “Get your priorities straight Buck.” You added before leaving the jet, disappearing into the wilderness.

Hours later you returned with a pile of wood kneeling down in the clearing the jet landed in. Bucky watched as you got a fire going. “How does a mermaid know how to do that?” He wondered out loud as he emerged with the blankets he found.

“Atlantean. And I didn't always live in the water… Dad loved to go camping a lot when I was a kid.” You explained as you took the blanket to wrap around you. Sitting by the fire your eyes drifted up to see the stars beginning to come alive in the mountain sky. Realizing how long it had been since you've seen them you let out a long sigh, studying each point of light.

“Man that's really something amazing.” He said referring to the soft smile and starlight twinkling in against your face as he sat beside you, leaning back on the blanket. It was nice to see you looking at peace for once.

With a growing smile you leaned back as well, your fingertips brushing slightly against his as your hand landed in the plush grass.  “Yeah...I've spent so much time in the water I almost forgot how beautiful they were.” You reached up with your other hand pointing to a cluster of stars. “That one is called puppis. It was always my dad’s favorite, he named his fishing boat after it.”

“Puppis? Why would you name a boat that?” He asked with a raised brow.

“Its part of a cluster that makes up the Argo. Its this ship from Greek Myth. Dad called it the impossible ship. The constellation moves westward but it sails stern first.” He watched your eyes go wide as you spoke. “Oh my god I'm an idiot!” you announced as you jumped up, the blanket fluttering from your shoulders.

“No objections here." He chuckled, watching you put the fire out with your powers. "Didn't you just get that going?”

“Yeah but I can get us home!” You explained as you scooped the blankets up.

“Did you suddenly remember Tony showing you how to fix the nav system?” He asked with a raised brow.

“Why? We have a working nav system.” You pointed upward. What sailor can't navigate by the stars? Once back on the jet he watched you slip into the co-pilot' seat as you helped direct him back to New York as you both sailed through the stars.

[staticscreenwriting]

the same sunset  - chapter three

Chapter three - trashed

Masterlist : add /tsmstorymasterlist after my URL

The music sounding from Carol’s house can be heard all the way to the other end of the street where Billy parks his car in the driveway that leads to nowhere. It seems there has once been a house there but now it’s just a deserted spot being used by teenager to park their cars whenever Carol decides it’s time to throw another rager.

Walking down the street towards the party, Billy can’t help but admire the confidence Cleo seems to emmit. It’s different to his. His is fake and take all the effort in the world to uphold. Hers seems to come natural. No effort at all.

“ You know “ she speaks up as they’re just a few houses away from Carol’s “ you can go in first if you want. They’re gonna talk if they see us arrive together. And I’ll have you know, as hard as it is to believe, I am not the most popular person. So if you don’t wanna ruin that cool brooding bad boy persona you have going on, I understand. They don’t need to see us together. “

“ Don’t make a big deal of it, then they won’t “ Billy replies. Back in California he was a different person. People there had known him since childhood and with them he didn’t ever really have to think about any image he wanted to uphold. He was just Billy. His mullet, the camaro, the music and the jeans. Those were just things that belonged to him as much as Max’ red hair belonged to her. They mean different things now.

In California he was Billy first, all the other things came with him.

Here they saw the car first, the outfits, the attitude. The loud music and the constant unbothered look etched onto his face. And from that they made up their own image of who he was. And it worked in his favor really. He’s adored by the girls and admired by most boys. And if that means he has to pretend not to be bothered by shit than so be it. Seeming numb is easy. He’s gotten a lot of practice at home.

“ Oh boy, you’re so not a small town boy. “ Cleo says and skips ahead of him a few steps, giving Billy a perfect view of her ass in jeans that are fitting like a god-damn glove. He can’t suppress a smirk, thinking back to Pete’s disapproving look back at the diner.

There’s a red solo cup pushed into his hand as soon as Billy enters the house. That awful “I Ran” song is blasting through the stereo and Billy remembers the reason he usually gets shitfaced at Carol’s parties. The music sucks.

Cleo walks further into the room and is swallowed by the crowd before Billy can figure out where she’s going. Only a mess of blonde hair visible as she squeezes herself between the dancing teenagers.

“ You know, when you asked me about her I just thought you were curious. Didn’t think you were into her “.

Of course it’s Tommy who hands Billy the drink, he’s probably been sitting by the door waiting for him to show up. It’s a little sad really, Tommy’s been following Billy around like a lost puppy from day one. But then again, no matter how annoying or clingy he is, Tommy is not a bad guy. He’s just not the brightest crayon in the box but Billy can deal with that. Also he’s Billy’s walking encyclopedia on all things Hawkins High and always knows when and where the parties are happening.  

“ Shut up, man. It’s not like that. I uh — I work at her dad’s diner. We were just carpooling here. That’s it”.

“ You have a job ? “ Tommy asks dumbfounded. His eyebrows are raised in question and for a moment it makes Billy angry.

“ We don’t all have a dad who blows money up our ass and buys everything for us, Tommy “

It’s a little harsh, Billy admits that, but that doesn’t make it any less true. Tommy’s dad is the owner of some big ass lumber yards all over Indiana, dispensing wood to all kinds of high class furniture stores to make fancy sofas for fancy people, like Tommy’s dad.

Billy’s met him a few times and he seems to have zero backbone and the personality of a sponge but his wallet is wide open. Probably to make him feel better about not giving a proper shit about his son. As long as Tommy doesn’t get too out of line, his dad doesn’t really pay him any attention. He’s supposed to take over the business someday in the future. That’s the end game. Everything until then doesn’t really matter.

“ Hey sorry, man. That’s not what I meant. I think it’s cool you’re working. Do you think you can get us a discount if we come around ? “

Billy only shakes his head, a smirk finding a way onto his lips again. Tommy’s a fucking nuisance most of the time, like everything and everyone in this place. But he’s honest and Billy can appreciate that a whole lot.

“ Dunno. “

As he takes a drink from the cup, Billy immediately regrets his decision. It tastes like Cranberry juice and disappointment. Whatever vodka concoction they’ve mixed together, it fucking blows. Like a prom punch spiked by some over enthusiastic junior.  

“ Thomas, show me where the beers are and we can see about that discount “ Billy says and throws his arm around Tommy’s shoulder. If he was gonna enjoy this party, bad music and shitty drinks and all, he needs beer. Lots of it.

- OOO -

Billy’s hands softly trail down the path of Erika Kapelsky’s curves. There’s some Bon Jovi song playing over the speakers and she seems to go wild on that stuff. Her ass has been rubbing his crotch for the last 5 minutes. At this point he is 99.9% sure he’s gonna score big time. He’s heard she gives great head. That she’s flexible too.

“ I’m gonna go to the bathroom real quick. Take me home when I come back ? Parents are on a business trip “ she murmures into his ear and softly bites his lobe as she pulls away.

That’s the good thing about rich kids, Billy thinks. Their parents are always on some uber important trips for work. It’s like they’re preaching abstinence and safe sex and then do everything in their power to make sure their kids get laid as much as possible. Like leaving them alone in a big ass mansion.

“ Sure “ he agrees and watches her walk away, hips swaying dramatically. She knows how to put on a show.

“ Erica huh ? Nice one, dude “ it’s like as soon as he is alone Tommy gravitates back towards Billy. Sometimes it makes him feel like he has an actual friend. Other times it’s just annoying.

“ Yeah “ as Billy looks towards the door Erica has just disappeared through, his eyes catch movement coming from the hallway next to it.

The big mess of blonde curls on Cleo’s head is bobbing up and down as Cleo hurries down the hallway. There’s stains of what Billy assumes is the shitty prom punch all over her shirt and she’s … crying ?

He doesn’t know for sure but she’s angry that’s obvious. Her lips are pulled into a scowl and her eyebrows are furrowed. She squeezes her way through the crowd and towards the door.

For a moment Billy wants to follow. Wants to figure out what happened, if she’s crying and why. He doesn’t though.

Not his mess. Not his problem.

That’s something his dad always says. It’s a motto that’s been drilled into Billy’s head ever since he was a kid.

He remembers when he was just a little boy, maybe 5 years old. Back in California when his mom was still alive. They didn’t have shit back then but a tiny house and a rusty old car. His mom was working at a beach hut in the mornings, selling overpriced postcards and plastic seashell necklaces to tourists. Dad was constantly between jobs, saying that he just hadn’t found the right one yet. Truth is, no one wants to hire a raging alcoholic.

They didn’t have much back then but Billy liked the house, liked the neighbourhood, because there were kids there. One of them was Gracie Tempers. She lived across the street and she came over to Billy’s house a lot because her mom was working late and Billy’s mom was home in the afternoon to have an eye on the kids.

Gracie’s mom would always come and pick her up, never her dad. And she always had a cup of coffee with Billy’s mom. She was crying a lot but back then little Billy had no idea what was going on. She had a lot of black eyes too.

One night Billy couldn’t sleep so he snuck towards the kitchen, hoping to find his mother still awake so he could ask for a warm milk with some honey, his mom’s special.

Instead he found mom and dad arguing, again. When he heard Mrs. Tempers’ name he decided to hide behind the door and listen. They were yelling. Actually it was mostly his dad. Actually it was only his dad. His mom was talking in a quiet hushed voice. So timid. So scared. She wanted to help Mrs. Tempers. Wanted to “ call the cops “ Billy didn’t know what was going on then and he didn’t know if that was a good thing. Mom always said the police was someone you could go to whenever you needed help. Dad called them corrupt pigs.

Anyway. She wanted to call the cops and “get her away from him”. Billy didn’t know who “he” was either.

But no matter how hard she was pleading, how reasonable she was explaining. Dad’s booming voice kept repeating “ This is not your mess, Rebecca ! Not your problem ! “.

Cleo isn’t’ his mess either. Isn’t his problem.

So instead of going after her, Billy turns back towards the door waiting for Erica to be done so he can take her home and create a whole different kind of mess.

- OOO -

The cold air nips at Cleo’s nose as she walks down the street of this seemingly perfect suburban hell.

She should’ve known better. That’s the bottom line of it all. Should’ve known that showing up with Billy Hargrove would cause unwanted attention. Negative attention. That people would take it as some kind of threat to their social status.

Tina has always been a mean person. Someone that doesn’t lash out but observes. She schemes and calculates and figures out where to hit people so it hurts the most and leaves the most damage.

And whether she does it just out of pure spite or because she has some deep rooted insecurities that she wants to hide behind her malice, Cleo doesn’t know. In the end, it doesn’t matter anyway.

What matters is that Cleo should’ve known better. Billy is all Tina wanted since the moment he stepped foot onto the grounds of Hawkins High. And when Tina feels even a little threatened in getting what she wants, she knows exactly how to retaliate.

Cleo roughly wipes away the tears still rolling down her cheeks. Tina’s opinion shouldn’t matter. Her words shouldn’t matter. And really, they don’t. That doesn’t mean they don’t hurt.

And it’s not even the stuff about Cleo that hurt. It’s the stuff she said about her mom. Those things cut deep. Those things, Tina really doesn’t know shit about. But the worst thing ? Carol stood there and she said nothing and she did nothing. Just turned away as if she hadn’t held Cleo’s hand at her mother’s grave. As if she didn’t take care of her when she had a panic attack the night before the funeral.

As if she hadn’t been an important part of her life for so long. For the good times, but especially the bad times.

Sure they aren’t friends anymore, fair enough. But does that mean all that once was is erased and means nothing anymore ?

The air stings against Cleo’s bare arms, clings to the wet patches on her shirt. This night is a complete and utter mess and she should’ve known better.

There’s a light still burning on the porch and one in the living room. No matter how easy going her dad always pretends to be, he’s still a dad. A dad who acts like he got caught up watching old football games but really deliberately stays up to make sure his girl is getting home okay.

On one hand, Cleo is eternally grateful for the wonderful dad she has. On the other hand, it makes hiding stuff so much harder. Like tear stained cheeks. And punch soaked shirts. And anger. And sadness.

“ Hey kid, I — Cleo ? “ the smile on her dad’s face immediately falls as he takes note of her obvious misery.

“ It’s not as bad as it looks. I’m okay, can we — can we not talk about it ?”

Ever since Cleo was a kid, mom was responsible for the emotional stuff. The long talks and the cheering up. For the rough stuff. The sad stuff.

Dad was the goof who went and bought entirely too much ice cream and put on her favorite movie even though they’d all seen it a million times before.

Ever since her mom was dead, that kind of shifted. Dad had to be both, the goof and the emotional support system. And it is weird for everyone involved. Neither Cleo nor her dad are particularly good at talking about their feelings so after a while they put a system in place that seems to work for them both.

If one doesn’t talk about it on their own accord, no questions are being asked. It’s easier that way. Or maybe they just pretend it’s easier. Either way, Cleo is grateful about that system right now. Because how would she even begin to explain that it all starts and ends with that fact that her mother would still be alive if it wasn’t for her ?

“ Uh — yeah sure. Sure. “

“ Cool, thanks “ she nods and walks towards the stairs. As she is about to round the corner, her dad’s voice echoes through the halls, calling out to her.

“ Cleo ? “

“ Huh ? “

“ There’s some mint chocolate chip ice cream in the freezer. Just — just if you need it. “

And for the first time since running into Tina, a small smile finds its way onto Cleo’s face.

- OOO -

Billy’s head feels like exploding. Like he’s in a comic and a big ass anvil has been dropped down on him.

The morning sun is shining brightly but the air is cold as he climbs out of Erika’s bedroom window and walks down the street lined by identical houses with identical white fences. There’s perfectly cut lawns, even in the winter, and the frost clings onto the grass making it glimmer in the sun.

The mailboxes are pridefully displaying the names of the families, some of which Billy recognizes from school. Of course people would want others to know they live here. These houses are massive.

He wonders if the people here are genuinely happy or if they have to play pretend, just like he does. He wonders if things were different would his family live in one of these houses. If Neil wasn’t such a fuck up and actually had a proper job that could provide the family with a better living situation, would he be less angry? Would Billy be ?

After a few minutes of passing big ass houses and pristine lawns and picket fences and artsy mailboxes, he arrives at his car.

There’s noticeably less cars here now than there were last night. Next to his Camaro is Tommy’s car which means he’s probably stayed over at Carol’s last night. Whatever those two have, Billy thinks, is a big old mess. They’re constantly at each other’s throats. Either fighting or making out. It’s exhausting for him, and he’s only watching from the sidelines.

Billy slumps down into the driver’s seat of his beloved Camaro. It smells like leather and cigarettes and honestly, it’s a smell that’s become incredibly comforting to him. His car is so much more than just a status symbol. It’s his way out. His escape. When things at home get too bad he can always get in his car and drive around. Aways from the yelling. Away from his father’s anger.

Away from home.

He turns towards the passenger side of his car, itching for a cigarette and hoping to find on in the glove compartment. Instead he’s faced with Cleo’s denim jacket discarded on his passenger seat.

He wants to ignore it. Pretend it isn’t there and just wait for her to come and get it. That’s another thing you learn in the Hargrove household. Don’t let your shit lying around or it’s gone. Neil never had any respect for any of Billy’s things so if he wasn’t being careful with it, Neil would just throw it in the trash.

He wants to ignore Cleo’s jacket so badly. But he can’t. He doesn’t.

- OOO -

The Finch’s two story home is painted a pale blue color. There’s paint chipping from the doorframes and the windows. The front yard looks clean enough but it’s not even close to the front yards he’s seen in Carol’s neighbourhood.

Their little white mailbox says “Finch” in what seems to be the handwriting of a young child. There’s 4 handprints. One big one that he bets belongs to Pete. A bright red one that he can only imagine belongs to a slightly younger version of Cleo. There’s a teeny tiny one that he’s sure is Charlie’s. Then there’s another one. It’s smaller than Pete’s but only slightly bigger than Cleo’s.

His heart drops a little at the realization of who’s handprint it is.

He wonder how she does it. How she lives through losing her mother and doesn’t end up resenting the whole world for it, like he does. He wonders if things would be different if Neil wasn’t such a piece of shit and actually gave a damn about Billy and his grief and this perpetual feeling of anger and bitterness. If he had someone like Pete in his life, would things be — ok ?

His mind drifts back to Cleo’s words from that time in the diner when she made them grilled cheese “Things are rough all over”. Maybe they are. Maybe they’re rougher for some though.

Denim jacket grasped tightly on one hand, Billy walks up the porch steps towards the door with the chipped white paint and rings the doorbell. He doesn’t know what to say to Cleo when she answers, if she answers. It’s not like he cares about her particularly much or about the fact that she was klutzy enough to leave her jacket, in the middle of November no less.

He’s not sure why he’s here in the first place. Maybe because her crying face has sneaked it’s way into the back of his mind every one in a while since last night.

Or maybe because he feels guilty for not bringing her home safe as he had told Pete he would.

Or maybe because he was curious about what happened.

Or maybe all of the above.

Though it’s not Cleo that opens the door. It’s a wild mop of bright red hair and a smile missing one tooth.

“ Billy ? “ Charlie asks, eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

“ Hey. ‘s Cleo home ? “

“ No. Why ? “

He hated being questioned. There’s hardly any privacy at home. Every part of his life seems to be considered public property to Neil. Secrets are dangerous. So when you are asked, you either answer or you face the consequences.

“ She left her jacket in my car. Hey where is she ? “

“ What does it matter ? “

“ I wanna give it back “

“ You can just leave it here. She’ll be back home eventually. “

Charlie seemed nice enough for a kid that one time he met her, but Billy can’t deny that right now she’s seriously testing his patience.

“ I know I can but I want to give it to her personally. If that’s okay with you of course. “ he snaps at her and immediately feels bad as he sees the sliver of uncertainty and — fear in her eyes.

“ Look — “ he starts and pinches the bridge of his nose “ — I let her leave the party alone last night and I feel bad about it, okay ? So just tell me where she is and I’ll give this thing back and say sorry and then we can go back to seeing each other at work and that’s it .”

Charlie bites her lip in uncertainty. Billy can see her considering all options. Finally settling on the thought that her sister deserves an apology if Billy is willing to give one, Charlie grants him a small smile and replies “ you know where the old junk yard is ? “

- OOO -

The november sun stands high up in the sky when Billy arrives at the junkyard. There’s a lot of shit lying around. Mostly tires and bottles, pieces of wood, half gutted cars and a variety of metal signs that seem like the used to decorate the shop fronts of Hawkin’s downtown once upon a time.

He spots Cleo the moment he steps out of his car. She’s in a pair of ripped jeans and a gray sweater that looks 2 sizes too big for her and falls off of one shoulder. Her blond curls are pulled into a messy ponytail but a few strands have escaped and frame the side of her face.

The thing that makes him wonder though, is the baseball bat clutched rightly in her hand.

He can her Black Sabbath playing loudly from small radio propped up on an old oil drum.

The pebbles are crunching beneath his boots as he approaches her and when she lifts her head, Billy can see nothing but annoyance in her eyes.

“ The hell are you doing here ? “ she asks, her voice rid of all her usually bubbliness.

“ You left your jacket in my car. You know, where I come from girls do that to make boy call them back. “ he says and smirks. He knows that wasn’t her intention but if there’s an opportunity to tease, Billy sure as hell isn’t gonna let it go.

“ Well here it just means that I forgot my jacket. Sorry to hurt your ego. “

“ Oh it doesn’t. Trust me. “

His gaze moves from her towards the baseball bat, then back to her. “ What the hell are you even doing with that thing ? “

Billy can see the smirk pulling at the corner of her lips. It’s tiny and barely there but he can notice it anyway.

“ Break stuff. “

She accompanies her words with a swing of the bat , slamming it into one of the rusting cars. There’s the crashing of metal and glass and the music all mixing together to create a melody of absolute chaos.

Cleo pulls back again and places another hit against the vehicle. Then another. And a fourth before she blows one of the stray curly away from her face and glances at Billy through the corner of her eye “ you wanna try ? “

He shrugs and takes the bat from her hand. “ You gotta make it count though. “

“ The hit ? “

“ Mmh “ Cleo nods then hoists herself up on the hood of another car.

And Billy makes it count. Not the first time. But when Cleo calls out to him to “ think of something that makes you really fucking angry “ he puts his all in the hit.

He thinks of his mother dying. His friends who don’t bother calling. His dad. All of it. Everything. 

It’s like with every time the bat descends onto the metal, his shoulders feel a little lighter. Like he gets to let go of his anger for a moment there and channel it all into the task of destroying the damn car. It’s what it feels like whenever he gets into fights only without the stupid consequences.

“ Feels good ? “ Cleo asks, sipping on a bottle of what he assumes is beer.

And when he looks up at her he can’t help but smile. Genuinely smile “ feels awesome! “

- OOO -

The two teens are lounging on the hood of an old Cadillac from the 50s sipping on their beers and watching the sun slowly set behind the trees. The junkyard sits atop a hill and you can just make out the outskirts of Hawkins from up here.

“ Why’d you come ? You could’ve just left the jacket at my place and leave. “ Cleo asks, eyes trained on the horizon.

“ What do I know. Thought I owed you this much. “

“ Why would you owe me ? “ she still doesn’t look at him but as Billy glances at her, he can see her pull her eyebrows together in confusion.

“ I saw you crying and I — ugh I don’t know okay ? Just wanted to see if you’re alright. Don’t make a big deal of it. “

She doesn’t. It makes her smile anyway.

“ Well thanks “

“ Whatever. “

For a moment it’s silent then Billy speaks up again.

“ What was that about anyway ? The whole crying thing ? “

“ They talked shit about my mom “ Cleo says and takes the last sip from the bottle before throwing it against the mount of trash making it break into little pieces.

“ That sucks. She’s dead right ? “ It might sound heartless and brash to some but Billy hates it when people sugarcoat stuff to him for no reason and something tells her Cleo isn’t that different when it comes down to it.

“ Yup. Yours too, huh ? “

Billy nods “ Yeah “

“ What happened ? “

“ Cancer. Yours ? “

“ Car accident. “

“ Fuck. “

“ Yes. Fuck. “

Billy turns his head to the side so he’s facing her and Cleo follows suit soon after.

“ That why you come here to break shit ? “ he questions, taking his last sip of beer then following Cleo’s earlier action of breaking the bottle against the pile of trash.

“ I was — so frustrated. With everything. I knew Tina was gonna talk smack when she sees me showing up with you but deliberately bringing up my dead mother to hurt me ? That’s low. “

“ That’s fucked up. “

“ That’s a highschool girl who feels threatened “

Billy lets out a humourless laugh “ It’s not fair though. She doesn’t know what the hell it feels like to lose your mom. You shouldn’t have to deal with her using that to hurt you just because she thinks her pussy is some kind of otherworldly experience that gives her the power to rule this trash pile of a town. For the record, it’s not. “

Cleo snickers and Billy thinks she looks fucking cute when she does it.

“ Can I ask you something ? “ Billy wonders, looking at Cleo expectandly.

“ I guess. “

“ Are you angry ? Because I — I don’t think I have felt anything but anger in so long. I’m so mad at god or the universe of whatever. Whatever is responsible for taking my mom away. My dad — Neil, he’s an absolute asshole. Always has been but mom — mom was good. So why did it happen to her ? It makes no sense and it drives me insane to think about it. It makes me so so furious. “

“ What makes you think I’m not angry ? “

“ You don’t seem angry. “

“ Well I am. I just — life needs to go on, you know. I gotta help dad with the diner and make sure Charlie is happy and healthy. I am angry I just literally do not have the time to dwell on that feeling. “

It makes sense, he think. Back in California life was shit too but he had friends there and stuff to do to take his mind off of things. Hawkins is quiet and empty and boring and his mind gets all the time in the world to think about the sad stuff. The shit that makes him angry.

“ Well look at us sharing sob stories like some kind of dead-moms-club. “ he scoffs but allows a little smile to tug at the corner of his lips which grants him a smile from Cleo in return.

“ Oh shut up, Billy “

And as her laughter echoes through the air and he looks up towards the November sky, he doesn’t feel so angry anymore, at least not for that moment. He’s not happy either but he’s content. And maybe that’s all he can ever ask for. To not feel angry all the time. To get a single moment of relieve. Of lightness. Of ease. Of laughter.

[mercuriallycooperative]

One of my long belated Steven Universe rewatch/reaction posts! Wow, I really did have lotsa thoughts about “Alone at Sea”, I can see why this stalled other posts. Also, it’s really long. Again, below is reproduced the unedited text of that reaction two years ago, typos and all. Blast from the past, isn’t it? I’m in no way caught up, so for all I know all these Jasper and Lapis issues have all been tidily dealt with in the meanwhile. I keep seeing other spoilers floating around whenever I browse my dashboard, ehehe... Something about one of the old theories being proven super super legit and ‘it was the truth all a long’ and revalidating some of the early speculative fic? Well, anyway. I’ll get to know the truth in time, I suppose. For now:

“Rewatching Steven Universe: Summer of Steven Edition”

Featuring: More Things I wrote before I did the first week’s worth of episodes!

(I wrote this second, immediately after the one for Monster Reunion. These are being posted in order now, though, finally.)

Week 2/Episode 9 of Summer of Steven (Thurs, July 28)

Alone at Sea

After watching for the first time:

Well then. That happened.

As much as I absolutely adore Lapis Lazuli, I do honestly like the fact that she is upset about what she did in the past, is guilty about the drawing away the ocean and the breaking Greg’s leg and the keeping Jasper trapped in a toxic fusion. Because yeah, those are things that are serious and need attention.

Like, I generally get the impression that during Ocean Gem and the taking of the sea that whole bit was a lot of panic and she probably severely mis-estimated the durability and strength of Steven, Connie, and Greg, because none of the things she was firing at then would have likely killed a gem, maybe poofed them or detained them, and Lapis strikes me as the oh-shit-that-was-overkill-wasn’t-it type. And while an actual “Sorry” to those involved would probably be good, and at the moment I think Lapis is kinda eaten up inside about a load of stuff, I think it’s generally good that she- I think what I’m trying to say is it’s good to see that Lapis is aware about how her actions have affected people.

Okay but Jasper though. I really, really appreciate the show did go into the fact that Lapis was wrong about the Malachite thing, that she acknowledges that she was doing it just to take out her anger on someone she was in control of, who she could feel like she had a reason to kick. I think they probably could have made that a little- not clearer, but maybe impressed the gravity of that a little more, because it did seem a little brushed off and a little like blame was deflected from Lapis there. I think maybe this will be addressed more in the future, though, next time we see Jasper maybe. Because on one hand, Lapis, that was super not okay. But on the other hand-

I get the impression that Lapis was terrorized at least a little on the way to Earth with Jasper and Peridot. Peridot mentions it was her that did the interrogating of Lapis, and “interrogating” puts me on alert right there, but like. There was something about Lapis’ body language, as it relates to Jasper and Peridot and her time on the Homeworld ship that, both now and at the time, made me really uncomfortable. Like. I dunno, my thoughts on Jasper are super nondescript, but she definitely makes me nervous, and coupled with Lapis’ experience trapped in a mirror for 5000-odd years, It’s not unreasonable to think that that is a reason Lapis acted so destructively, self destructively, and seemingly disproportionately.

Not a reason that excuses trapping someone in a shared mindspace so that you both basically kill eachother every day for months and give you both even more trauma. But it all does hint at the sort of rushing-headlong-into-this-is-TOTALLY-A-GOOD-IDEA-RIGHT-oh-god hysteria of decisionmaking that is not born of maliciousness, exactly, not the calculated kind. Just. A lot of bad stuff that ends up hurting everyone around you.

So like, we definitely need to see Lapis deal more with what happened with Jasper, and I think the show could do with impressing the idea that what happened was Not Okay a little more strongly. Like, in a Lapis and Jasper episode of Too Far+Back to the Barn+Friend Ship in terms of real talk, when (I hope) Lapis and Jasper are eventually both on the Side of Steven and Co., maybe.

Now, re: Jasper herself. Holy crap, that was moderately disturbing. Like, I’m worried about her now. (Also, she’s definitely not on Neptune- but definitely well within finding-the-gems-again range. I predict seeing her again before the Summer is out...) Like, she definitely doesn’t have her shit together. And I think- I get the impression that it’s a really unhealthy combination of power-drunk from any of the times she wrested control of Malachite from Lapis for moments, plus the trauma of Lapis using her considerable mental discipline (re: being able to control her hydromancy so well and at such volume) to take out her pain and anger on Jasper.

At the same time- I don’t want to be excusing Jasper any more than I want to be excusing Lapis. Jasper, most recently, immediately turned to threaten Steven after Lapis refused to re-fuse. During Jailbreak, the whole let’s-dangle-Lapis-in-the-air-and-tell-her-”Fuse with me”-and-”Just say yes” set off a number of alarms, and in a meta-sense, given that the Crewniverse has been good about what vibe comes across as a precursor to what information, I’m really getting the feeling something was up there.

It’s just, we haven’t really seen much from Jasper. She’s a threat (an old general) because she was sent by Homeworld (the oldest enemy) and of course some of that (must be) is a product of Homeworld and what they are but the question (one of them) is how much we can say Homeworld has super brainwashed her- because like. With Peridot, we’re getting the impression she’s young. She’s said it- that she’s one of the new Peridots. Presumably fairly recent, after the Rebellion, during the reign of this New Homeworld. And a lot of her, her lack of scope, her loud, bouncing-around superiority and her everything-in-its-place, it may come from the Diamond she served under, but it’s as likely it comes from the Homeworld that she was created in. But Jasper? She’s of the Old Homeworld. The likes of which created Centipeetle and Lapis and so much has changed, we’re told, between the new and the old.

Lapis was trapped in the mirror. Time likely passed so strangely, for a trapped, cracked gem whose purpose was to be a seeing-glass. And Centipeetle was corrupted, her mind trapped in mazes and probably either some amount of pain or some amount of- of insensibility, of hazy dissociation, but living ages and ages on Earth. And the Crystal Gems of course had their post-war cleanup mission of the world, and all the little history contained therein.

They were all, bar Steven and Amethyst, born of old Homeworld and the fires of the Rebellion.

So was Jasper. And of course Jasper had the added something (I won’t say benefit nor will I say misfortune) of seeing Homeworld change before her eyes. The changes that so shocked Lapis were ones that Jasper likely experienced firsthand. Jasper is old enough to have been an adversary on (what seems to be fairly) even keel with Rose Quartz.

Honestly, while I think Jasper is certainly more complicated than The Big Bad Evil Gem and that she’s certainly not to blame for all the badness that’s been going down, not least of which I mean Lapis and the choices she’s made...

I think that it doesn’t give Jasper enough credit, to say “Oh well she’s a product of The System and as soon as we get a chance to say things to her she’ll be toast legit Cheetomom”. Like maybe there’s a whole lot Jasper just doesn’t have the context for because Homeworld sucks and has toxic messages fucking everywhere but like. Jasper still has her own agency. And as far as I can tell, she’s old enough (experienced enough) to know that, the same way Pearl (when she’s not flipping her shit) knows that, the same way Garnet and Lapis know that.

If we respect her at all, Jasper needs to get the same responsibility for her actions/behaviour/personality that all the other characters get shit for when they act mean, or coercive, or otherwise threatening.

We dissect every second of, say, Pearl’s behaviour, or Amethyst’s, or Lapis’, or (a little less) even Garnet’s and Steven’s. And we pick out their traumas and neuroses and pasts and biases and some of the internet screams YOU ARE SHIT FOREVER BECAUSE OF THIS and some of the internet screams YOU ARE A PRECIOUS CINNAMON ROLL WHO CAN DO NO WRONG but the other parts of the internet (of the SU side of Tumblr) are pretty careful about saying, “Okay you have a reason for this thing, and I get that, but it doesn’t excuse you for the thing, and so accept responsibility, and we’ll move on and love you still”.

Jasper should be treated likewise.

... okay so that descended into a rant about ~70% of my Jasper related thoughts. I’ll probably have more after I end up reading the contents of my dashboard since last night. I’ve totally lost track of the rest of the episode.

Time to rewatch it and pick out more interesting bits!

1) Lapis looks happier, at the beginning of the episode. I like the little bit about Steven reminding her to close her eyes, on account of the last time Lapis could totally see through her wings.

2) It’s interesting how Greg is still keeping himself so friendly, even as his introduction is an awkward you-broke-my-leg-that-one-time. It’s very much the same way he greeted Marty, actually- very cordial even though he was uncomfortable. Very much just being the bigger person, not to be superior, but just. Keeping everything friendly-like.

3) For that matter, regarding introductions, Lapis looks very awkward receiving that introduction- it looks to me like both the okay-I-was-not-expecting-that-introduction-that-was-weird-how-do-I-respond-to-this and the sheepish-kinda-guilty sort of awkward. This is how I interpret it, of course, but...

4) “It was more than one [bad experience” says Lapis, regarding her time at the bottom of the ocean with Jasper. I’m curious what she means by this. More than one bad experience, yes, but- more than one bad experience with Jasper at the bottom of the ocean? More than one with Jasper, including time on the hand ship? I might be forgetting something in the rush of new episodes, but, this seems interesting to me. Or was she referring, there was more than one bad aspect to her experiences as Malachite, both the damage Jasper did fighting her, and the damage Lapis did fighting Jasper, and, in that last one, the damage Lapis hints later at having done to herself in terms of becoming someone she doesn’t want to be?

5) “I don’t deserve this.” Lapis definitely knows she’s done some stuff that’s not on. And she’s had time enough to work through some of the things that’ve happened, and to her credit she’s being fairly open with Steven despite what I see as some very reticent tendencies.

6) Actually, those kind of make sense. Lapis spent over 5000 years in a mirror, as an object, meant for the express purpose of revealing personal information without her consent. Even used as a general information device- or perhaps it was only that Pearl assumed that was her purpose- that’s a long time with very little agency about how she could communicate with others. So long spent having to communicate what she doesn’t want to, unable to communicate what she does, and then shortly after her release being interrogated (in one way or another) by Homeworld, is it any wonder that Lapis wants to work things out for herself and not spill all her thoughts with others? Is it any wonder that she has a hard time doing so?

7) It’s interesting, Steven just brushes aside the “I don’t deserve this” with an “Of course you do!” I think that for a lot of Steven’s life, he was able to solve a lot of problems this way. And a lot of the time, that’s because the problems he was fixing, the personal ones, were because of personally directed aggression without anything to back it up- intrusive thoughts, the perpetual self-esteem gremlins that are made of unsureness and the ghosts of a thousand poisoned thoughts. It’s less common that he’s really had to deal with people who have seriously done a thing wrong some time where he hasn’t been around to see it- he saw Amethyst shapeshift into his mother, he say Pearl’s deception about Sardonyx, he saw Peridot working for Yellow Diamond, and so he can understand that sometimes things need working out. But Steven- he also sticks so staunchly with people, believes so firmly that people default to good- as with Lars, I think in some ways Steven is still naive. And recently, he’s been going through stuff that pushes him to work on that.

8) Who the hell names a boat the S.S. Misery?

9) I do appreciate that Lapis finds the name of the boat and their poor attempts to cover it with a moniker based on her own amusing. I appreciate a sense of humor like that.

10) “Don’t put me in charge!” “You shouldn’t trust me with the boat.” Again, picking through this episode I do see evidence that Lapis is working through a lot of guilt regarding her fusion with Jasper. I think she needs a talk with someone who’s not Steven- but I’m at a loss as to who would even remotely be a good person for that. Amethyst has a 50-50 chance of brushing it off like Steven or being legit serious about it, Pearl would commiserate and have a 50-50 chance of having a guilty-spiral party or giving some good advice, Peridot doesn’t have any of the fusion-related context for this and would likely brush off the whole thing, and Garnet would be great except there’s a 90 percent chance of something in the conversation being horribly upsetting to her, and a non-zero percent chance that Lapis would end up seriously on the shit list. Like. All together with an open dialogue, they’d likely get a good problem-solving issue-addressing dialogue going, but that’s always the case. And how often does that sort of conversation happen.

11) I just noticed Lapis hydromancing the orange juice in her champagne flute idly, and it’s great.

12) Also, actually, when Lapis answers “I’m not putting that on my body” all bluntly about the hat and Greg just takes it in stride, it occurs to me that he’s probably used to that exact reaction from Pearl about all sorts of human things.

13) While I think that Steven is really good at just- being a good balm for grief in the soul, making people a little happier, just for a bit, I think maybe the fact that he keeps interrupting Lapis whenever she starts reflecting is kind of a double ended spear. Like. I think she does need time to reflect and come to conclusions and start figuring out where she stands- as in Barn Mates where it’s pretty clear that she needs some space. On the other hand, it’s likely she’s been spending a lot of time since then brooding, so one day of lightness would probably do some good. Just. It has to be a day when Jasper shows up and the starts of the breach of all the issues floating around. Well, it had to be sooner or later I guess.

14) I honestly can’t tell if Lapis and Steven’s enjoyment of the boat’s foghorn is because it’s a loud, moderately obnoxious noise, or if it’s because it’s a loud, moderately obnoxious noise that’s kinda reminiscent of the humorously timed fart noises they bonded over.

15) Lapis just really wants to help and to impress Steven. Even if it’s in ways *cough* floating water sphere of fish *cough* that are moderately alarming. I think even as we delve deeper into the less pure-cinnamon-roll aspects of Lapis’ character, it’s important to remember that, regardless of the rest of things, the be-helpful/impress-Steven thing is a really big part of her personality now.

16) And, despite the control Lapis must have to do so much of what she hydromances, I think she kinda needs to work on the smoothly-putting-things-back part. Although given, I suspect that may sacrifice speed to some extent.

17) It’s interesting that Lapis quiets Steven when he’s about to start gushing over her powers again.

18) The description of how-to-fish seems very much like some sort of meta-commentary or subtextual information about the current state of affairs.

19) Also, the entire fishing part was just me waiting for something to trigger somebody’s wave of discomfort/trauma about something related for the catching/eating of the fish. Although actually, description of the fish-catching as a metaphorical construct aside, it occurs to me that gems who aren’t heavily human socialized (so, anyone not Garnet, Pearl, Amethyst, or Steven) would probably not see have any immediate unsettled response to any flesh-ilfe-form’s blood and internal workings beyond “this is messy”. Like, they’d have no reason to have the awkward sympathetic discomfort that I think a lot of humans get about such things, because of course gems aren’t flesh-life-forms.

20) When the boat starts shaking, I love the fact that Lapis immediately asks Steven what’s going on, like, Yes Lapis the Boat Shaking is a Very Important Human Boating Ritual, Perfectly Normal. It’s great.

21) Okay so wait. There was trouble with something (presumably Jasper) fouling up the rudder somehow (I’m imagining her accidentally getting her hair caught in there to be honest) and that’s legit okay plot is happening. But like. The engine also gave out. Is that a that thing fouling up the rudder can even do, or did Greg just happen to rent a boat that would have a) possibly gotten someone with no gem powers at hand stranded in the middle of the ocean to maybe starve to death and b) stuttered to a stop possibly forcing awkward conversation and weirdness even if plot wasn’t happening around it?

22) “It’s my fault. I’m the one to blame.” For the boat breaking, Lapis? “I can’t stop thinking about being fused as Malachite. How I used all my strength to hold her down in the ocean, how I was always battling against Jasper to keep her bound to me.” Okay, that’s guilt, I’m getting, that’s guilt, and probably some pain of injury, and what were those two throwing at each other down their in their minds? For that matter- did Malachite the fusion have even any chance to form a mind for herself? (Maybe it would be better if she didn’t have.)

23) “But it’s not like that anymore,” says Steven. Oh god, I didn’t notice this the first time. That’s the same thing Peridot says when trying to make up with Lapis before she’s ready. And the same point applies here- maybe it isn’t like that anymore, but the past still matters, what’s happened to us and what we’ve done still matters. And I think that Steven, who forgives (people who aren’t Marty or Kevin or Jasper) so very easily, who loves and (almost always) lets go of bitterness (particularly recently as his powers have started working and he doesn’t have to be afraid of not having them) and who’s succeeded (often enough that he’s trusted to do his thing) so much that he assumes his way is the correct one, Steven doesn’t necessarily get so much that even when a thing is done, it takes more than a skip, a hop, and a song to make the past better.

24) “You don’t have to be with Jasper.” Steven, oh Steven. I don’t think that she ever really did. And Lapis knows that.

25) “That’s not it. I miss her.” It occurs to me that her time as Malachite is probably the longest time, the first time, she’s spent in a stable (by which I mean ‘not likely to randomly change without her input’) situation over which she had any control at all for the last 5000 years. Trapped in the mirror, she had no agency. As Homeworld’s/Jasper’s/Peridot’s prisoner, she had no agency. But as Malachite, Lapis was a driving force bolting them together; as long as she didn’t let go, she had a lot of the power. It isn’t an excuse and it certainly isn’t right, but, is it any wonder really that Lapis misses the certainty of a fight against someone she had a reason (and an excuse) to fight, the certainty of a fight that she, for a long time, was winning? “We were fused for so long...“ Longer than any fusion bar Garnet that we have any precedent about.

26) “But- she’s terrible!” Steven only knows Jasper as an enemy, who, you know, knocked him out and also poofed (killed part of his mind probably insists in nightmares) one of his mothers in front of him. And that was his first experience with her- even Peridot, with her robonoids and suchforth, left a more neutral impression (even if this was partially because it happened before Steven had much context at all for Homeworld and what an invasion might mean). Jasper’s alarmingness (see a few points down) and sudden let’s-attack-Steven from this episode probably did not help that impression at all. I think Jasper might be Steven’s next big hurdle of understanding-folks. I hope we get a Jasper redemption, but I also hope we see Steven’s processing the way he distrusts Jasper, and see him (hopefully) decide to give her the chance he’s given others.

26) “I’m terrible! I did horrible things- I broke your dad’s leg, I stole Earth’s ocean- Go on! Tell me I’m wrong!” Honestly, even without Jasper’s sudden appearance, I feel like this episode could have got a whole lot done. Like. This conversation with Steven and Lapis definitely needs to happen. As much as Lapis needs Steven’s optimism and love and brightness, she needs him to stop brushing what she did under the table, she wants him to stop brushing it under the table. It probably makes her feel like she’s deceiving him, like she’s hiding things from him in order to have his support. And Steven needs to stop brushing it under the table so he can better help Lapis, and for his own safety- not from Lapis but in general. This black-and-white view of good-bad, even heavily skewed toward white, could well have him walking into a situation that just needs him to leave it alone for a little, to address very real issues and dangers.

27) Jasper appears, and her expression is moderately alarming. Like, all that fan art of how Jasper smiling friendly-like is still alarming? That alarming, but moreso because in this context it makes her look... like she’s been upset somehow. Like, in the literal stirred around until her behaviour is all in odd order way.

28) Also, given the rest of the day, I’m wondering how much Lapis may be thinking am I hallucinating did my thinking about her so much summon her wait are we still trapped somewhere am I still trapped somewhere is this reality Steven do you see her too? or stuff like that.

29) Okay the Lapis flinching as Jasper approaches does lead me to think that Jasper did something at some unspecified time that made a large mark on Lapis’ Afraid-Of-This meter.

30) “She’s the one you should be afraid of.” Jasper, are you implying you are afraid of Lapis? And hiding it (working through it) because as an old general (an old soldier) you’re used to that much? Also, Jasper, even sharing space with Lapis for months hasn’t taught you that Steven is not his mother? (Then again, it could be deliberate stubbornness as a reaction to any point of view Lapis has...)

31) “That’s not true.” I think, what Lapis means it that Steven specifically has nothing to fear from her.

32) “I thought I was a brute. But you, you’re a monster.” What the hell happened down there guys. What the hell. (Also. Is Jasper meaning particularly things Lapis did to her, while keeping them trapped together? Or is Jasper meaning that she’s seen bits of memories of things Lapis has done in the long-past, before or during the war? During Lapis’ much obscured history.)

33) Okay, the hitting Steven so hard he goes flying (or, for that matter, at all) is just not on. Jasper, we know Lapis wronged you, but that’s not how you continue this dialogue. (On a meta level, with that move that is clearly not okay, is the Crewniverse trying to make two wrongs don’t make a right very, very clear? And also, for that matter, keep Jasper established as Not Yet Good At All but More Complicated Than You Think? There was that magic the gathering color identity tweet or post or whatever by someone of the Crewniverse who also said we’ll be seeing some of that Complicated later, so...)

34) Where is Greg during all this, how much does he see, how much does he hear?

35) “Let’s be Malachite again!” “Why... would you want that?” It’s really, really alarming actually to see Jasper in that position of supplication. Like. Holy shit. None of these kids are okay. And Lapis’ expression seems to put across the same what the fuck oh shit you’re not okay are you.

36) Jasper’s whole Fusion Is Great Now We Can Be Super Strong! Stronger Even That Either Of Us! is really rather disturbing when put into both the context of Homeworld and it’s gem experiments thing and its cross-gem-fusions-are-an-abomination-that-must-all-die thing and in the context of Garnet’s major issues with fusing just to be stronger.

37) But. “We could fly!” I can understand that. We only saw the short shot of them flying in battle against Alexandrite, but, is it possible that between trying to mentally kill the fuck out of each other, that Malachite (how much of her independently there ever was) or Jasper and Lapis just. Flew somewhere as fast as they could go, trying to escape themselves?

38) For that matter- obviously Malachite is a very literally toxic fusion (google malachite gemstone toxicity for more information on that fun symbolism). But in other cases, what’s the difference between fusing solely for power, and fusing because you become someone you enjoy being because you can do such wonderful things which include, yes, flying and being extremely strong? Isn’t that what Sugilite has been, when we’ve seen her? As long as all parties are cool with each other to begin with, seriously, where are we drawing the line?

39) The whole dialogue between Lapis and Jasper is just really, really twisted up. “It’ll be better this time! I’ve changed! You’ve changed me!” promises Jasper, who by Lapis’ own account was the one so much was being taken out on. It’s like. Two abuse narratives being twisted back around upon one another, compounding each other. Yeah... none of these people are okay.

40) “I’m the only one that can handle your kind of power!” It’s tugging at my memory, but I’ve heard this line before. Read it somewhere, in a situation like this... An old Xena fanfic, a Buffy fanfic? Whatever it was, it was not of the good, and both people involved were hurting eachother in exactly this way.

41) Okay so people keep giving Lapis shit about punching Jasper off the boat without apologizing or actually fixing any of their issues beyond airing them a bit, but might I just point out that Lapis punched Jasper off the boat and far away immediately after Jasper began charging Steven and shouting “I’ll shatter you!” ? Steven is still squishy and not at all up to any sort of combat with Jasper, and it is certainly not wrong for anybody’s first reaction to be Keep the threat away from Steven!

42) Is this a new ending song? Like, a new part of the ever-progressing ending song? Huh. Cool.

Well that got long. Lots of thoughts and conclusions. See you next time, folks.

[idonthaveanaccent]

Orbit 7 Branch - Part 2

I hope you enjoy the second part!

Pirating was a huge problem throughout the galaxy. People of all races would gather up, angry at others for the things they had. So, what better way to fix it than steal it and sell or keep it for themselves.

If you were caught, you could spend up to thirty years in jail. If you were a pirate and a murderer, well, there was a hefty price to pay.

Xylion had been trained to deal with threats like this, from a logistical sense. He was also taught exactly what to do when capturing a pirate.

It involved either taking them down with force, or managing to persuade them through talking and less violent means.

He recalled learning about the different species that mainly resorted to pirating. From the Roachons, Helbriggs, Donstans, Greymans, Hondlores, etcetera.

Xylion had never heard of a human pirate crew. Apparently they were out there, as he was now staring at them. He looked at the demonic voiced one and took in his appearance. He had a darker skin tone, similar to that of Human Isaac’s. His hair was dark and seemed to be pulled back in an almost perfect way. His eyes were a dark color that reminded Xylion of the chocolate syrup Human Mason so enjoyed. He had hair on his face, unlike the other humans on the ship. The only problem Xylion had with it was that there was basically nothing there, it was just a shaded version of his skin, but Xylion could tell it was hair. 

He clearly still had a lot to learn.

Xylion glanced at the other humans, and saw Human Isaac covering Human Quinn’s eyes as she struggled, yelling obscenities at him. Meanwhile, Human Jenny was staring slack-jawed at him, her eyes glazed over. Xylion frowned. What was wrong with them?

Human Fredrick stepped forward, crossing his arms. His gun was clenched tightly in his hand, still being shown to the pirates. Xylion shivered slightly before looking back up at his eyes. They were filled with...hatred?

The pirate who had revealed his face looked over Human Fredrick. His eyes slid over every part of his body, and Xylion watched his eyes light up. “Fredrick Matthews? Longtime no see.” His voice was cool and calculated, no longer demonic like it had been. It had a different sound to it unlike the other Humans. Similar to Human Quinn’s, yet also very different.

“Angel Kramer, it has been a long time.” Human Fredrick answered, his finger brushing the trigger of the gun.

Xylion glanced back at the other humans, who all looked confused. Did they not know this man? And Angel? Xylion had heard of angels, but eh did not believe that they were a name. When Human Jenny and him had hung out one time, she described the basics of one of the religions in her world. She mentioned there were a ton, but she knew more about this particular religion because she grew up living and breathing (whatever that meant) it. She said the angels were beings under God, and they were like his workers, helping humans and such. 

Why would this man be named after one? He certainly didn’t look helpful.

Human Angel smiled wickedly at Human Fredrick, lifting his chin up slightly. “You still enjoying the dusty cobwebs of the library? Or have you finally realized that being a true space explorer takes more than just brains?” Human Angel walked towards Human Fredrick and began to slowly circle him. “It takes a good amount of strength and muscle to even handle the basics of capture and saving, you know. Have you forgotten that? Or, rather, have you tried to embrace that? Because if so, you have failed, my friend. Oh so badly.”

Human Isaac stepped forward. “You know what, maldito? You need to step down, or I will open fire.”

Human Angel frowned. “¿También hablas a español?” 

Human Isaac chuckled. “Only thing my grandparents spoke, maldito.”

Human Angel’s frown turned into a scowl real quick. He looked back at the other humans before his eyes landed on Human Jenny. He grinned before walking towards her, but before he could reach her, Human Fredrick blocked him. Human Angel chuckled lowly. “What, is this your girlfriend?”

Human Fredrick tightened his grip on his gun which he now held tightly against his chest. He nodded. “Of course she is my girl friend.”

The whole room fell silent. Human Angel’s eyes widened. “Actually-?”

“She is my friend who is a girl.” Human Fredrick said, nodding. 

Everyone visibly relaxed. Xylion didn't realize how tight he had clenched his tentacles or how much mucus had seemed to dry off his skin. He wasn’t scared. No.

He realized he had just been extremely pissed off.

Xylion forced himself not to think about it. Human Jenny’s face was beet red. She looked down at her shoes. Human Angel chuckled. “I think you hurt her feelings, Freddie.”

Human Fredrick said nothing, not daring to move. The two stared at one another for a while. The tension in the room skyrocketed, and Xylion felt even more mucus begin to secrete off of him. 

It had felt like eternity before someone spoke. “God, keep the testosterone in your pants boys.” Human Quinn knew how to break a silence.

Human Fredrick and Human Angel stiffened. A few moments of even tenser silence passed before Human Angel chuckled, running a hand through his hair. “How intriguing. What a mix of a crew they’ve got, yeah? Humans and aliens, mixing together...how strange.”

One of the other pirates stepped forward. It wasn’t the robotic speaking one, but their mask was also terrifying. It looked like some old, sagging man’s face, with strange orange skin and decaying blond hair. Xylion could see their eyes through the eye sockets. They laughed before pulling their mask off. 

They had a seemingly similar skin tone to Human Fredrick, but slightly lighter, if that was at all possible. His eyes were a light blue, and held some sort of life and laughter within them. His dark hair fell around his face, and he clearly wasn’t the strongest of the group. He was frail looking, but Xylion had learned to never underestimate humans. Especially the frail ones.

“Look at ‘em, Kramer. They all look like they came straight form the academy, no past experience whatsoever.” Xylion didn’t like this guy. He spoke with the same sort of voice as the majority of his human crew, but that didn’t make him like the others at all.

Human Angel nodded. “They’re quite the group, Turner. Now, I suggest we finish picking them off and leave with the cargo. Who’s with me?” He cried, pumping a fist in the air.

The other four pirates mimicked his action, crying out. The humans glanced at one another, and even Xylion could tell how they were feeling.

They were conflicted. Xylion could understand the thought of senselessly killing for protection from a different species other than your own, but killing your own? That had to be forbidden in human society, as it was in many others.

Xylion glanced at Human Mason, who’s faces was completely void of any emotion. His mouth was slightly ajar and his eyebrows resting cleanly on his forehead. There was something else, though. His eyes. They were wide and seemed to be shaking almost. Xylion could feel the fear in his eyes whenever he looked into them. He understood the pain, even if just for a moment.

If Human Mason was terrified, then they had little chance of success, it would seem.

I love finishing writing a part/chapter as a song ends and a new one starts. 

Anyways...

What do you think of this part? 

I like it.

My favorite part if looking up bad words in Spanish. They never taught us this stuff in school. 

I think you’re gonna like part three where you really get to know the rest of the pirates. I’m trying to through in a ragtag group from throughout the world, so let’s hope that this works out.

Friggin’ Aussies with your weird slang. Not that I’m judging, but why in all of god’s name is liquid laugh a term for friggin’ vomit? I mean, this website could be wrong, but holy crudola.

So anyways, I hope you liked this part! 

What do you think of Jenny perhaps liking Angel, appearance wise so far? And Xylion? *wink wink*

Ahem.

Thanks for reading!

[siodymph]

Symmrat Week Day 4

And here's day four! We're officially half-way through Symmrat week!

This is my take on their role reversal. And personally, even if their background stories are switched I still like to think they both still keep their talents with explosions and hard-light. But instead of making his stuff from scratch Junkrat had a life-time of experience and tony stark-level attention over his weapons. And then Satya is the one who makes her turrets from scrap and is completely obsessed with reverse engineering hard-light.

You can check it out under the cut or over on my AO3 Enjoy!

When he’d first joined Overwatch, Jamison wasn’t sure what to expect. He’d never really had friends, going straight from school to a fully-fledged career all through Hyde Global he’d been one of their finest chemical engineers and weapons expert. But he’d always been called a shut-in and knew embarrassingly well that most the other engineers he worked with never thought highly enough of him. Not even in their days together at the academy. The one time he’d tried approaching them on the matter they said he always made things awkward, that he was always so loud and unfiltered, also annoying, never shutting up. He never bothered trying to talk to them after that. It still made him a bit bitter. He knew he was different, but that had just made him all the more important to Hyde. He could do things, make things no one else could. His controlled light explosions had been a breakthrough in the industrial world. At least, that’s what Hyde’s suits had always said to him when he was first starting out. He’d done so much for Hyde Global, he’d given an arm and a leg for that company. Literally.

So when Overwatch came back from the dead and HG wanted a representative on the team, he was very skeptical. Why would Overwatch want Hyde Global’s weapons expert when no one in that company seemed to care much about beyond his bombs and weapon designs?

He could have never predicted just how quickly the Overwatch team would worm its way into his life. That for one he’d be a member of a team, that the people he worked with would honestly have his back, and that he’d actually enjoy working in a group instead of on his own like usual. That after a year on the team he’d be best mates with people like the gaming legend Lucio, or pop-sensation Hana Song, that one was especially surprising seeing how she’d become famous for her blatant opposition to Hyde’s presence in Busan, South Korea. And yet now they were some of his best friends.

And he would have never, ever expected Satya.

A new recruit, just like he was. That however was where any initial similarities between them had come to an abrupt halt. When she arrived at the Overwatch headquarters, she was wearing tattered clothes, hair unruly and ragged, and a thick layer of dirt clung to her skin. He’d learned a bit later that she was from the wastelands of India, and allegedly she knew deep secrets about Vishkar tech, a company that had just begun developing something called “hard-light” when the Indian Omnium blew up and along with over a third of the nation and the rest of Asia, destroyed Vishkar before it could truly lift off the ground. Satya was one of many abandoned people left to fend for themselves. She was silent as death and never took her eyes off any of them, as if expecting them all to turn on her at a moment’s notice.

And for a while that’s how things were in their team. But slowly, slower than anyone could have truly seen, things began to change. Satya began to open up to the rest of the group, put more trust in them. And Jamison was too, much to his surprise. What had started as a temporary gig for him had turned into one of the happiest times in his life. People who started out as just heroes and strangers he would work with had turned into friends and family he couldn’t imagine leaving. And Satya. Satya had turned into so much for Jamie, he could have never prepared himself for how much Satya would mean to him.

How much he would fall in love with her.

Her eyes, there was just such an energy hidden in them. A fire she held as she turned metal scraps and rubbish into beautiful weapons in the labs. The fire that seemed to explode out of her whenever they went on missions, going from silent and calculating to striking down their enemies, the ones who’d been foolish enough to underestimate her traps and her power. In quieter moments, far away from battles and payloads, that fire would crackled softly with such a warmth whenever she laughed at his jokes, whenever she got lost in thought, whenever she smiled. She was brilliant, she was amazing and it scared Jamison to think that he’d fallen so hard for someone in such a short time.

Then one night Satya pulled him aside in the workshop. Said she wanted to tell him something important, but she couldn’t tell him in the Overwatch base. That there were too many cameras hidden everywhere and they needed to get somewhere unwired.

Jamison had foolishly agreed and now seemingly for hours the two of them drove out of Gibraltar. The city became a small blip far behind them as they drove further and further inland away from the sea. Until finally they reached a safe house hidden far into the woods.

“Mei and I set this place up during our heists.” Satya explained as she got out of the driver’s seat.

It certainly looked like the type of building quickly rebuilt while on the run. Once it might have been an old cottage but now high-security devices outlined every window and the door. As they stepped in Satya directed Jamie how to step over all the traps that lay hidden all around the front entrance. Until finally they were both sitting on the floor of the living room as the only furniture was a musty matress in one corner of the room.

After rechecking the entire safe house one last time, she sat down next to Jamison. “Nothing leaves this room.” She said steely.

“Of course.” Jamison said, unsure exactly what he had been dragged into.

“You swear?”

“I swear, Satya.” He wasn’t sure what Satya was about to reveal, but not matter what it was Jamison rationalized that nearly nothing her secret could be would make him leave this room.

“Ok...” Satya took a deep breath, looking quickly to the door before locking eyes again with Jamison. “You wondered how I know so much about Vishkar’s hard-light? Well… this is my secret.”

She then began taking apart her mechanical arm.

But instead of removing it from its detachable joint on what was left of her upper arm, she began ripping off bits and parts. The arm she’d held so much pride in, she always bragged about how she made her arm completely on her own from metal scraps and wiring she could find in the Indian ruins. It had been her pride and joy. She’d refused everyone’s help, even Jamison’s, when they offered to upgrade her arm. And now she was tearing it apart like it was nothing to her.

Jamison was about to protest when he saw a flash of white emerge as the she slowly took apart the arm. It couldn’t be… It was impossible…

But slowly Satya took off all the scraped pieces, Jamison realized that the arm had just been a shell. Made only to hide a beautiful, pristine, sleek arm. And when the palm began glowing with a brilliant blue light Jamison couldn’t deny it any further.

It was a Viskar prosthetic gauntlet. Possibly one of the last in existence.

Jamison felt speechless, Vishkar was a tall tale, an Arthurian legend. So many people he knew at Hyde had said “hard-light” couldn’t even theoretically exist. And yet here it was. Beams of light were being bent into prisms effortlessly in Satya’s control. “H-How?”

“One time when I was younger and foolish I attempted to scavenge the Vishkar ruins. It cost me my left arm but in turn I discovered something much more valuble…”

“Oh my god Satya… It’s amazing.”

She smiled and brought the gauntlet closer. “Try it, pinch the light to make a shape…”

Jamison was tentative to touch the light. He felt like he was about to touch the holy grail of engineering. He watched as his hand was illuminated by the light and he attempted to pinch the light as Satya had instructed. It took him a few times to try gripping the light but the fourth time he tried something seemed to suddenly connect and the hard-light followed his hand, fanning out in into triangles. He grinned up at Satya who smiled back.

“If anything happens to me. I want you to have my arm.”

Jamison looked up at her surprised. The way she said it, she sounded so certain.

She continued before he could say anything. “It’d be a pity if it ended up left in a museum, collecting dust and going unused. Something like this deserves to be used. To its complete potential. That’s why I want you to have it, Jamison.”

“Satya, you don’t have to

“Ok… but just in case.” Satya pressed moving closer, closing her gantlet around Jamison’s hand. “Please, promise me you’ll keep it safe?”

“I swear I’ll never let anything happen to your arm, darl.” He murmured, kissing Satya’s beautiful hand. And he raised his head to look Satya directly in the eyes. “But I’ll be a dead man before I let anything happen to you either.”

Satya frowned at that, looking away from him and down at her arm. “Thank you Jamison, but I’m not as important.”

“You are to me. And much more precious too.” Jamison said gently taking hold of her chin and looking back into her eyes. Ad before he could think against it he leaned in and pressed his lips warmly against hers.

That night he learned an invaluable secret, one that could destroy corporations, entire nations if wielded wrongly. But most importantly to Jamison, he realized just how much Satya loved and trusted him. And in that night he finally placed his whole heart and trust in her too.

[crwdby]

CRWDBY Chapter 2: The Mission

“Hey,” It took Yang a second to realize where she was. Yang was at Red Base, and so was Blake. “Yeah, Blake?” Yang asked, and instantly recognized what was happening, and knew what Blake would say next. “Do you ever wonder why we’re here?” Blake asked. Yang took this opportunity to be a part of an important, and philosophical point in the tale of the Reds and Blues. “It’s one of life’s greatest mysteries isn’t it? Are we the product of some cosmic coincidence, or is there really a god out there, with some kind of plan for us and stuff?”

The scene suddenly whirls across the canyon to see Nora and Ren on a cliff. Ren looking at Blake and Yang through binoculars.

Nora was becoming impatient, “What are they doing, Ren?” The silent teen took his face away from his binoculars, “What?” Nora restated her question. “I said, What are they doing now?” Ren became irritated with Nora, “Oh my god Nora! I’m getting so sick of you asking that question!” Nora came back with the same amount of sass, “Hey, you have those binoculars and I can’t see squat! Don’t complain about me, because I’m not gonna just sit up here and wait for something to happen.” Ren didn’t want to escalate the argument further so he tried to calm her down, to no effect. “They’re just standing there and talking, Nora. That’s all they ever do, is just stand there and talk. That’s what they were doing last monday. That’s what they were doing when you asked me ten minutes ago. And when you ask, five minutes from now, I’ll still say that they’re still just standing and talking.” Nora, being as nosy as she is, needed to ask one last question. “What’re they talking about?” This bent Ren a little too far, “You know what? I hate you”

The camera whirls back to Yang and Blake. Still, just standing and talking. Like usual.

“Talk about a waste of resources! We should go out and find new and intelligent forms of Grimm. Fight them” Yang said in the middle of a conversation. Blake agreed, “Yeah, that’s why they should put us in charge.” Ruby from somewhere in the base “Ladies! Get over here on the double!” Blake and Yang were startled by Ruby’s sudden call, “Crap, Yes sir!”

   "Yang Jesus Christ wake the fuck up or I'll make you have a dream that you have no hair!" That was what Yang woke up to the next morning, and she knew that it was her friendly AI Church, because no one she knows is that profane. "Stop yelling, I'm up!" Yang yelled out loud, startling her teammates. "Uh, Yang we didn't say anything. Are you hearing things?" Blake asked, still wondering what's gotten into Yang. "Oh, I thought one of you said that if I didn't wake up you'd make me have a bad dream." The blonde replied, 'That was me, dumbass' Church thought making Yang frown a bit. "It looks like you did have a bad dream, Yang." Ruby said, noting Yang's frown.  

Yang got out of bed and got ready for the big day ahead of them, team RWBY gets to choose their very first mission. “Do you know what kind of options we have?” Weiss asked, nervous about how she could complete a mission while dealing with the nonsense that is her team. “I have no idea, but we get to chose as a team!” Ruby said hopefully.

‘Do these missions involve dealing with whatever this Grimm thing is?’ The AI asked Yang. “Of course, missions help rid the world if Grimm. One little bit at a time.” Yang thought. ‘Damn it, those things are scary as hell, like Crunchbite. Which reminds me, if we ever see Tucker again, remind me to call his kid disgusting.’

Yang was the last to use the restroom to get ready and as she exited, she grabbed the stuff she packed last night for the mission. As she did this, both Yang and Church noticed Blake wasn't wearing her bow today. “No bow today, Blake?” Blake calmly replied, “Nope” and the team left for the auditorium for their mission assignment. Church couldn't string enough words to make a sentence and just stuttered. ‘Blake? Why doesn't… Yang, did you…?’ Yang had a hard time holding her laughter in front of her teammates and thought to Church, “You just got pranked, dude. Or as I like to call it, Yang-king your chain!” ‘Fuck you then’ Church snapped, and went offline.

When team RWBY reached the Beacon auditorium, the headmaster and assistant headmaster were on the stage, about to begin a speech of some sort. The assistant started by gathering everyone's attention and then turned it over to the headmaster, Professor Ozpin.  

(Imagine that Ozpin’s speech is here because I'm too lazy to plagiarize it)

The team was more than ready for their mission ahead of them, they just had to pick one. “This is awesome! All we need to do is pick a mission in the southeast, and we're perfect!” The red leader exclaimed as team RWBY searched for missions in the southeast quadrant of Vale. Yang didn't try to hide her excitement, “Yeah! We'll follow them during the day and give them the slip at night!” The AI couldn't control his inner Tucker and said the iconic phrase, “Bow chika bow wow” Yang had to stifle a laugh and she was lucky that no one was looking at her then.

Ruby was the first to notice a mission that fit the team’s needs. “Here it is! Quadrant 5 needs Grimm eliminated!” Everybody agreed, but when the team tried to sign up, the screen read, “First year students are not allowed to take this mission” the team was disappointed, except Church chimed in, ’Hold on give me like five seconds.’ Yang created a small diversion, “Are you sure you spelled it right Ruby?” The team leader was a little offended by the question, “Of course I did, do you doubt my spelling abilities, my dear sister?” Church returned to Yang as Ruby was speaking,’Ok I cleared you guys for this mission, you should also beef up your security. That was way too easy.’ “Why don't you try again, Ruby, just to be sure” Yang asked, curious to see if the little AI actually allowed them to do the mission. Ruby re-entered their team and much to the team's surprise it worked this time. Yang took this as an chance to gloat over her sister, “I thought you entered it right, Ruby?” The young leader was dumbfounded, and so was the rest of the team. All of them tried, and failed, to find an explanation to how the system rejected them, but seemingly changed its mind.

As team RWBY made their way across the expansive courtyard toward the port, Church interrupted Yang’s thoughts. ‘So why does Ruby and the team need to get a mission strictly in the southeast?’ Yang could never get used to the sensation of Church talking, but she continued her step as if nothing happened. “What to do you know about the White Fang?” She thought to Church, who replied, ‘Aren't they a radical group of Faunus fighting for equality?’ Church asked, and Yang responded, “Yeah, and Blake used to be a member of them, but don't tell her you know, and we caught wind of a staging area for the White Fang hideout southeast of here, and that's where we are gonna mess up their plans!” Church used his superior AI mind (Delta) to make a quick calculation and made an observation. ‘From what I can see, the only reasonable place for a criminal staging ground southeast of here is a settlement named Mountain Glenn.’ This gave Yang a little bit of hope that they picked the right spot. “Sweet, that's exactly where we're going! Church was going to respond to his new friend, but was interrupted by Yang’s team.  

“YANG!” A gunshot from Crescent Rose quickly followed her owner’s scream. “Ruby! What did I tell you about blindly firing into the air? You probably just killed an innocent person!” Weiss squealed towards Ruby. “How else were we supposed to get her attention? Tackle her?“ The red head retorted, Weiss huffed and looked away, clearly offended. “Yang, we've been trying to get your attention for three minutes. What's so important that you have to tune us out?” Yang was able to think of a reasonable lie, “Uh… I was just thinking about how this is our first mission! I can't wait to kick some White Fang butt!” Blake could see through the lie, but she needed more time and evidence to prove that something is up with her friend. Blake put this in a mental folder aptly named ‘Proof Something’s Wrong With Yang’ and put it back in her mental filing cabinet.  

The team got to their assigned dock and waited for their airship to take them to Mountain Glenn. After a minute or two of waiting, an airship arrived at the teams dock, and put zipped Professor Oobleck. Team RWBY and Church knew they were in for one hell of a mission.