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nooo I can't sleep because im having fever-induced (?) half dreams of trying to check into an airbnb As a dragon but they won't let me in bc my paws don't work on the phone or because I don't understand money or whatever. stupidest problem ever of the worlld

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Do you accept

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This request was sent to us and we made a poll in response to it. Send any Blorbo-related question you want to our inbox and we’ll make a poll on which people can vote with their own Blorbos in minds

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how to bite your phone in two (2) easy steps!!:

step 1: place your phone in your mouth

step 2: bite

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huh. my entire apartment building smells like waffle cones

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PSA

This is The Adjuster (Robin Hoodie, Guy That Shot the CEO, etc.):

And this is Luigi Mangione:

And yes, they are both super cool and hot as fuck but remember, they are two different people. The Adjuster has not been found and Luigi was never involved in the shooting.

Do not talk about them as if they are the same person and do not further spread the idea that Luigi is guilty.

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I just found the earliest email I ever sent from my email address, and it’s the funniest goddamn thing I can possibly imagine a fourth grader sending her teacher:

(Context - my fourth grade teacher was on maternity leave, and the state of the classroom fish tank was dire under the substitute teacher’s tyrannical rule. The class convened at recess, and decided to inform our (24yo, new mother) former teacher of the situation. I was selected as the duly appointed representative for this solemn communication.)

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I put every bird I could think of into this wheel. Spin the wheel. You're that bird now.

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I hope I'm not just a mutual to you, but someone you want to bring up in irl conversation so you have to awkwardly and cryptically say "my friend..." and refuse to elaborate on my origins or the origins of our friendships

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"why are you on your phone all the time" my frands :) hope this helps!

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jsyk if we've ever had a positive interaction you can summon me for boss fights