#an repressed homoerotic tragedy

[sadlittlecountess]

[hexhomos]

wait before i go if you are a toxic yaoihead who is specifically watching this space because you want to see deranged guys beating each other with sticks you NEED to watch Amadeus (1984) im not fucking kidding look at this poster

It's a 3-hour madness desire repression homoerotic masked descent drama about a composer (Salieri) who sees himself as Mozart's greatest musical rival, but at the same time, he loves him too much, and therefore he must find a way to kill him. one of the best movies of all time if you love and crave mess. chief hag central. intricate rituals as a thesis.

it is of course a tragedy but it really slaps and if you watch it let me know what you think later

[joicecubes]

listen i’ve always been a sucker for sibling dynamics in media but holy fuck there is something especially gut-wrenching about stanford and stanley pines. i’m a big shipper so usually i latch onto those homoerotic friendship type dynamics but man…. gravity falls has me BAWLING over these brothers. i will never be able to listen to regina spektor’s “two birds” EVER again without thinking about the tragedy that is these two emotionally repressed old men. im so cooked

[motions1ckn3ss]

'I Cannot Heave My Heart Into My Mouth’: Shakespeare and Alice Winn’s In Memoriam

or, an academic blog post i wrote for an english literature assignment as part of my shakespeare module at uni. a huge thank you to @jovienna for proofreading and providing the most helpful suggestions, i'm very proud of this piece and i just got the mark back for it today and i received a 2:1! enjoy :)

‘But since she pricked thee out for women’s pleasure, / Mine be thy love and thy love’s use their treasure’ (Shakespeare 13-14): a declaration of queer love, not just in Shakespeare’s Sonnet 20, but also in Alice Winn’s debut novel In Memoriam, published in 2023. Throughout the novel, the character of Ellwood quotes various poems with famously homoerotic undertones as a way of professing his love for Gaunt, a fellow student at the boarding school they attend, in an era of repression and illegality concerning homosexuality. The works of Shakespeare become some of the most notable amongst this number.

Shakespeare’s Sonnet 20 depicts desire for a man that he cannot have. The love interest of the poem, being a man, must be for the pleasure of women only, as Nature has decided. As the closing lines express, all Shakespeare can offer the man is his own love. The meaning of these lines are certainly not lost on Ellwood, and to the regret of the poet-speaker who is resigned to Platonic love (Mahony 70), writes them ‘in pencil on the wall above Gaunt’s bed, and Gaunt had hoped they meant something.’ (Winn 42).

Despite this, Gaunt refuses to let himself believe this possibility, though Ellwood assumes that he simply does not reciprocate his feelings – ‘anyway, Gaunt already knew that Ellwood loved him. Because of the sonnets.’ (Winn 113). More than three hundred years after the publication of his sonnets, Shakespeare’s words connect with Ellwood and provide him with an outlet. Ellwood deliberately selects Sonnet 20 to ensure Gaunt knows of his love in a way that stops him ‘going completely mad and confessing wild, undying love for him, which he knew would have made Gaunt extremely uncomfortable.’ (Winn 113). Shakespeare puts pen to paper to write of his own unrequited love for another man, and Ellwood follows in his footsteps.

These closing lines of Sonnet 20 are not the only writings of Shakespeare referenced in In Memoriam, with King Lear arguably creating an even more heartfelt moment between the two men. The First World War, in all its tragedy, does bring Ellwood and Gaunt together, with the two only acting on their desires amidst the ‘hyper-masculine atmosphere of war’ (Winn 120). Following their honourable discharge from the army, the two move to Brazil together to live in relative safety. Ellwood suffers from post-traumatic stress disorder, and as a result of this no longer recites poems as he used to, unable to see the joy and meaning in doing so after seeing what one man can do to another in the name of war. Without his poetry as a means of expression, Ellwood struggles to express his emotions and the love he feels for Gaunt, leaving us with the heart-wrenching lines ‘some long-dead poet must have written the lines with which to answer, but Ellwood no longer knew them.’ (Winn 342).

And yet it is the words of Shakespeare, a long-dead poet, which Ellwood utilises to convey the sincerity and weight of his emotion to Gaunt when he feels a simple ‘I love you’ would not suffice. Frustrated with his own inability, Ellwood evokes the words of Cordelia, Lear’s daughter, so that Gaunt knows it is not a lack of love which prevents him from speaking.

‘Ellwood grimaced and shook his head, clearly frustrated. “No, Henry, I,” he said, “I – I cannot heave my heart into my mouth.” Gaunt stared at him. Ellwood looked just as shocked as he was. “Shakespeare,” said Ellwood. “King Lear.”’ (Winn 375)

‘Can it be that Cordelia’s emotion silences her at a moment when it is vital that she should speak?... Can it be that the quality and weight of her love drives her to understatement and to brusqueness?’ (Morris 141). Ivor Morris’s reasoning for Cordelia’s words ring true not just for the context of King Lear, but also for the final pages of In Memoriam. Much like Cordelia, it is not a lack of love which leaves Ellwood speechless, but an abundance of it. Throughout his adolescence, Ellwood finds solace and comfort in Shakespeare’s sonnets, quoting his words to convey his emotion when his own will not suffice. Following the tragedies the war has brought the pair and the world alike, Ellwood turns from these romantic poems to a tragic play in order to suitably express this shift in his feelings. Witnessing the horrors of war has changed him fundamentally as a person, and yet the works of Shakespeare, alongside his unwavering love for Gaunt, remain a constant in his life.

Works Cited

Mahony, Patrick. “Shakespeare’s Sonnet Number 20: Its Symbolic Gestalt.” American Imago, vol. 36, no. 1, 1979, pp. 69-79.

Morris, Ivor. “Cordelia and Lear.” Shakespeare Quarterly, vol. 8, no. 2, 1957, pp. 141-158.

Shakespeare, William. “Sonnet 20: A woman’s face, with Nature’s own hand painted.” The Sonnets and A Lover’s Complaint, Penguin Classics, 2009, p. 22.

Winn, Alice. In Memoriam. Penguin Books, 2023.

[saltywinteradult]

Rhaenicent predictions for S2? My guess is they’ll have Alicent abandon her family and join Team Black. It’s the only way I can see the ship becoming canon.

Apologies in advance, I meant to keep this brief, but... well, they are my otp.

My view on Rhaenicent is basically this:

Okay. Jokes aside, I’m not predicting that Rhaenicent will ever become canon. They simply have too much bad blood and too many war crimes in the baggage to ever reunite, and we all know there is much more and much worse to come.

Yes, they’re clearly in love and never got over each other, but while I'm fairly sure Rhaenyra, raging bisexual that she is (me too girl lmao) recognises their past situationship for what it was, I'm not sure Alicent ever acknowledged it even to herself. She may be the lesbianest lesbian that Westeros ever saw, but she's also spent years repressing that part of herself and devoting herself to the role of a wife and a mother as well as to her religious convictions. (And yes, it is very telling that in spite of all that, Alicent was ready to jump into bed reconcile with Rhaenyra in episode 8 anyway.)

Most importantly though, there is no way in hell Alicent is going to abandon her children — the children she’s suffered and sacrificed so much for — for Rhaenyra’s sake. That is not happening. Likewise, I have a hard time seeing Rhaenyra forgiving Alicent for, as she sees it, participating in the usurpation of her throne. I would love for them to have hate sex, but at this point I don’t see any possibility for an actual full reconciliation that wouldn’t be a betrayal of either character.

What I AM predicting is boatloads of gay pining and homoerotic fighting, much like in season 1. I’m expecting that, in spite of all that's happened and all the ways they've hurt each other, both Rhaenyra and Alicent will have a lot of conflicting feelings about going to war against each other. One or both of them might even advocate for the other to be spared should their side win. If and when they meet face to face again I expect the romantic tension to be off the damn charts, but I don’t think either of them will acknowledge it, because how could they? They’re enemies now, after all. They both have their own families to protect and their own diametrically opposed ambitions to fight for now. I expect them to homoerotically commit all of the war crimes and hurt each other over and over, because they're at war and they have to, and hate every second of it. They hate each other and miss each other all at once. They want each other and can never have each other. They were forced apart and suffer for it. That's the tragedy I am expecting and hoping to see.

TLDR: I don't think they will ever reconcile, and I'm completely fine with that. The possibility of them becoming canon has never been part of the appeal of Rhaenicent to me. I am simply of the opinion that everything, especially war crimes, is much more fun with homoerotic subtext. I'm just here for the gay tragedy of it all.

[wallbeatjournal]

congrats! You get to give one explicitly queer arc to a character that doesn't have one. Who do you choose, where do you put it, and why?

i'm probably the wrong one for this question because i truly do love the way riverdale plays with implication and queer coding in the style of the hays era / love-letter-to-the-celluloid-closet type shit, but with clear and obvious intent and spite and awareness and fun.

that said. jughead. make jughead reckon with himself a little bit. his repression is like. the most world-shaping repression. and that would be so neat and fun to try to draw his awareness towards, even just a little bit. s5 bret ww plot where he sends jughead a book review analyzing all the queer subtext in his novel and the aggression he feels towards that archie stand-in character (and jughead has to go to the prison to debate him ferociously about it of course). or hell, have him do it to the short story during the original stonewall plot, when they're roommates. or have s7 veronica do it when jughead shows her all of those troubling troubling comics.

(you can tell my heart isn't in the "explicitly queer arc" assignment bc even in these examples i'm imagining jughead finds a way to "if i'm repressing something i'd like to keep it repressed" it all and not really take any action. but maybe he gets a blowie or a homoerotic close-face-to-face argument from bret about it first.)

OH ALSO. i think archie and joaquin should have hooked up in juvie. no constructive changes to the arc just an even more homophobic flavor to the institutional abuse and even more tragedy when joaquin betrays archie at the end of the arc.

[idonotbitemythumbatyou]

Hiii, what's your perception of Tom and Greg's relationship? Is it true love underneath it all? Lust? Power? All of that or none? I'm in love with your succession fic, it's everything a succession fic should be. You manage to capture the character's voices and inner worlds so well... I'd just like to know what do you get from Tom and Greg, I love their dynamic.

Hi!

short version: I think it could be true love if either of them had access to their souls.

As it IS. We can't know. They've divested themselves of all human warmth and connection in exchange for money and power. Any sincerity is not only difficult to even access, but dangerous to their standing to express.

Up to the finale, I think their relationship is mutual obsession. They're the outsiders on the inside, so they'll always have a little more in common with each other than The Family or the Old Guard. They're actually more comfortable with each other than anyone else (the bar is low), and who has the power in any given scene is deliciously difficult to untangle.

It's loving because they're both starved for affection, and genuinely kinda like each other. It's violent because affection between male friends is forbidden in the strange exotic culture of corporate New York. And then it's homoerotic because Tom is doing his best to imitate the boundary crossing, sexually violent language of the Roys, but is simply bad at it. And then consider that Greg is taking his cues on banter from Tom. Truly learning from the worst. You end up with shit like "disgusting brothers," and recounting sexual exploits in uncomfortable detail three inches from your platonic bro's face.

And then, you throw in a pinch of genuine attraction, and the verdict is love, your honor! Oh wait. no. sorry. I read that wrong. The verdict is repression, actually. Sorry. It's repression. They're both on such shaky ground in their corporate climb, that even if they could admit to themselves that they might have one (1) feeling, it would not be in their best interest to express that. So we get all... whatever is going on over there instead.

I gave this line to Shiv's internal monologue in my fic but: it's like jazz. It's about all the sex they're not having.

At least. That's how it is before the finale. Finale, I think, changes everything. Tom's pretty securely in the chair, and he's literally objectified and declared ownership over Greg (I did not find the sticker romantic. Loved it, but it made me sad for both of them but I digress). So if he wanted to, he could probably bang his assistant without causing too much trouble for himself. They'll both think they're manipulating the other, and any emotion (if it's there), is going to have to stay repressed for safety.

Now, I've heard people say that tomgreg is cringe. And I would agree. But if "cringe comedy" implies the existence of "cringe tragedy," then that's Succession, babe!

And if anything were to happen between Tom and Greg, the characters within their own universe would also find it incredibly cringe, and that is just hilarious to me. Cringing, dying, can't stop being obsessed with each other.

Thank you so much for reading, and those kind words! I'm trying hard to keep it as in character as I can - their voices are so distinct, and I definitely struggle to capture them at times. And thanks for coming to talk about Succession with me!

[the-marcos-family-sucks-ass]

Hi....If you don't mind, can I ask, what are your top 10 (or top 7) favorite media (can be books/ manga/ anime/movies/tv series)? Why do you love them? Sorry if you've answered this question before......Thanks....

of course 👍👍 i have not answered this question before . here u are :

1. Mob Psycho 100 - i genuinely think this anime has completely changed the way i view life, other people and also myself forever, and also has made me feel more comfortable in confronting and talking more with people. its also really cute uniquely-animated show with silly funny characters. #reigen4life

2. Mystery To Iunakare (Don't Call It Mystery) - while i think this jdrama/manga is fairly unknown internationally, in japan its quite popular. Even with the lack of international love, i am obssessed with it, because i like how its homoerotic as hell, the little mysteries, how it portrays did (dissociative identity disorder; this disorder is extremely stigmatized so its nice to have a character that is a somewhat realistic portrayal of it), sympathy for abuse victims and that they're completely justified in killing their abusers, silly guys befriending random criminals on ths street, etc. It's a fun show that has an aura of tragedy surrounding it, and i love comedy and tragedy!!!!!!

3. Move To Heaven (kdrama) - every episode, i cried, straight up bawling my eyes out at how this show chooses to portray the dead through their belongings. the cinematography is so breathtakingly beautiful and makes me feel so calm and peaceful even though ik im gonna be crying in the next few minutes.

my favorite episode is episode 9, where i relate to kang seong-min/matthew green, being treated as a foreigner in your own home country hit hard. the loneliness and the frustration of people treating you differently because they see you as an alien that doesn't know where it is and doesn't understand anything. it hits even harder the more times i rewatch it.

it also has my 3 faves things in a show: autism, queerness and tragedy!!

4. D.P (deserter pursuit; kdrama) - this show is such a good critique of the military and toxic masculinity. i haven't finished season 2, but it's still at the top of my list because of how much emotions it made me feel, anger sadness disgust etc. like !!!!!!! i hold so deeply in my heart the nuances of trauma. queerness. tragedy. the way mandatory rotc brings so many people to their lowest point in life while the military does nothing to help them. victims of abuse never being able to get their voices heard or make an impact despite sacrificing their own life in order to make a change.

idk, its just a really cute and silly show ^-^

5. I Told Sunset About You (tv series) - in every episode i cried as well, sobbing screaming running around the walls WAILING. i like how it portrays the struggle of being a poor bisexual asian person who has just recently found out they're queer.

i love the whole "self hatred and unwillingness to accept your identity, causing you to hurt others in the process" thing, because it makes teh a more nuanced character to me, that he's not perfect or flawless and that he's a person that does not know how to react to finding out he's queer, having to constantly feel pressured to be better than his older brother, feeling pressured to repress his identity, etc. etc.

(i don't know if i can say the same for the second addition, "i promised you the moon", though, that one was mostly just fine, not as good as the original, but fine.)

6. The Untamed/Mo Dao Zu Shi (cdrama vers.) - i feel like you already know the answer as to why i like this one alot. its tragic, its queer, its convuluted, it has so many dead characters, etc. everything i love to see in media all put together!! wen ning my son 🫶🫶🫶

7. Everything Everywhere All At Once (movie) - this movie made me kind of understand me and my foster grandmother's relationship more, and has really influenced me to work on communicating with her better, and that i can do silly shit that makes me happy all i want. Forever. seriously made me want to continue living on despite my own country not being able to accept my queer existence.

8. Call Me Chihiro/Chihiro-san (movie) - one thing i love about call me chihiro is its calm chaoticness, how the protag just seems to go with the flow of life. i think the relationships chihiro forms with the people in the town are so beautiful and personal ,, it feels so peaceful and happy despite all the bad things that happen in it, like there's this hopefulness and composed even under pressure type of vibe to it that made me tie it close to my heart

9. Saving Face (movie) - this movie is pretty much SUPER ICONIC in like, the world of asian lesbian films, and for a pretty good reason too,, i feel like it emulates so much of the average lesbian experience with having an Asian family. the casual racism from the mother, the lesbophobia, the matchmaking, the constant peer pressuring into getting a boyfriend, etc etc. i cannot think of one scene in this movie where it didn't directly remind me of lesbian tomfoolery that happened in my life.

it's also just a really cute movie about acceptance and has a good ending (which is rare for lesbian films)

10. Marry My Dead Body (movie) - the concept of this movie is unusual but the execution is so good i can't even. like it made me cry 3 seperate times. while not obssessed with this movie that much, so i can't talk too much of it but its cute!!!!! i thought i was going to get the ick bc of the homophobic main character but he started to grow on me the more he changed his views when he got accidentally ghost married to a guy. and also how they got each others backs all the time and won't hesitate to sacrifice themselves to protect the other is so real. #lintzuchingfan4life

[jewishdainix]

Reasons to read ROTE:

- Its a tragedy in some ways but very hopeful in others. It feels too hopeful for me to label it as a tragedy but too sad for me to label it as a happy ending because it has no much unresolved stuff and pain and it basically is just like real life. But as a fantasy book. Its a painful yet hopeful demonstration of even if you are so broken and hurting and hurt others and even if you cant fix what youve done or what has been done to you you are still important and still deserve and will find love and people who will support you.

- It will fuck you up. Like it will make you cry and drive you insane its so good so amazing etc etc

- explores queerness wonderfully! (The author denies the queerness but what she claims happenes in the books and what actually happened in is entirly unrelated) I don't wanna spoil anything (although im pretty sure youve seen it on my blog) but this story is incredibly queer.

- To quote @monachopsissssss after they read a passage Ive sent them from the books "Ive read gay sex scenes less homoerotic than that"

- It is soooooo the amazing devil coded

- It will fuck you up. "Does the dog die?" Yes. A lot. And its heartbreaking. But the pain is so worth it.

- The main character of most of the books is ome of The characters of all time. Hes king of emotional repression and unreliable narration. He narrated the entire first trilogy while having pain flairs and it shows

- This series is very inspiring. All the fans are so talented there are amazing fanarts and songs! Im even working on a song for it right now :] we all collectively go insane about some things from the books and cry about them every day. This series made me start using the phrase "coughing up blood" because thats what it feels like.

- It has cool magic in it. And dragons!

[medusas-daughter]

Can someone explain why Alicent is so shocked the green council has been planning to usurp the throne all these years when she's been telling Aegon herself that he is the challenge to Rhaenyra's claim whether he wants to be or not and his very existence is in danger if he doesn't strike down his challenger first and has been telling Aemond that Helaena is to be Aegon's queen (a child didn't get that idea all on his own). And then when they start implementing the plans Otto started when he first sent her to Viserys's chambers she's like 👁️👄👁️ Ali, babe, are you alright? Queen of gaslighting herself I swear

(either that or bad writing, that's what's been bothering me for two days, I understand the whole angsty "don't murder Rhaenyra in cold blood" speeches, like yes repressed lesbian with buried feelings all make sense and furthers the tragedy started by making her Rhaenyra's childhood companion which I'm genuinely not mad at, love the sapphic homoerotic writing that has always lacked on tv/film imo, but the being surprised and acting like the ONLY reason she's doing this is because of a dying man's ramblings just makes no sense)

[marley-manson]

Griffguts for 002

Tysm!

002 | Send me a ship and I will tell you:

When I started shipping them:

Surely pretty much immediately. I watched the anime first and while I don't remember much about that viewing experience, I know myself and I know I would've been like 'okay these two dudes have an intense relationship so that's what I'm gonna be focusing on.'

My thoughts:

It's the best lol, it's just so good. Amazing tragedy, amazing potential, amazing vibe, amazing friends to enemies dynamic, amazing aesthetic, amazing tropes... and the story really sells how their relationship profoundly affects both of them.

What makes me happy about them:

How good the tragedy is! Griffith escaping his feelings through the sacrifice, Guts abandoning him because of his low self esteem, Griffith throwing his life away, Guts staying in denial as long as possible... There's nothing that makes me happier than a story about people who make incredibly bad choices for very undertandable reasons thoroughly rooted in good characterization.

What makes me sad about them:

The fact that it'll never be finished, at least not by Miura. I wanted a cathartic final confrontation so bad omg.

Things done in fanfic that annoys me:

lol there's not a whole lot of fanfic to get annoyed by, but I guess I'll say possessive/dommy/yandere/etc Griffith. I see where it comes from superficially but it's not my thing and I don't think it actually fits his character at all.

Things I look for in fanfic:

hmm... I don't read too much Berserk fic so this is hard lol. Obviously takes on the characters that fit with my own opinions. I like bittersweet missing scene Golden Age stuff a lot in theory, or AUs where Guts never left, or darker post-canon stuff.

My wishlist:

They have a moment of understanding in which they both realize they actually could've had it all and they threw it away and they'll never be as happy now as they could've been, then they kill each other in a homoerotic way and die fulfilled, and thematically this is reflected in some grand shift in the world. Basically their past relationship is vital to the overall happy ending of Berserk even if they don't get to live happily ever after.

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other:

I otp them hard. For Griffith the answer is loveless empty marriage and a subtle yet profound sense of loss, and for Guts the answer is Serpico but only like, from the thematic angle where all of Guts' problems come from gay repression lol.

My happily ever after for them:

I actually wrote it! Basically Guts and NeoGriffith get back together, Guts having destroyed everything and everyone and become a monster for a while, and NGriff having accepted that he failed to get rid of his feelings so he'd better find a liveable plan B so he can at least preserve his goals and life this time. They become roving fantasy heroes/monsters together. Or maybe they kill each other one day. It's up in the air.

[noa-ciharu]

Arguments for every candidate:

X!Seisub:

For: they're legit having eye sex whenever they meet, are obsessed with one another and have ust worth of 9 years. Also you can't tell me Seishirou didn't want to fuck Subaru and what Seishirou wants he gets cuz he's selfish like that

Against: something about Subaru never getting to feel touch of one he loved the most is heartbreaking in top notch sort of way. Brings on more tragedy

X!Fuukam:

For: lol look at their canon 'fights' you cant tell me Fuuma never got hard while he was molesting Kamui orc dude wants it. And keep in mind he's a wish readers so that tells you enough about Kamui

Against: if they fucked either the world would be saved or destroyed no in between. Literally happenings in X are fuled by Fuuma's pent up horniness

TRC!Seisub:

For: how do you think Seishirou became a vampire? Do you really think pure cute vamp Subaru doesn't have a priest kink? Pft yea sure he fucked that priest so kinkily Kamui walked in on them had 5 heart attacks and decided to make it his life mission to repress Subaru's kinks

Against: they've legit never interacted face to face in trc :<

TRC!Fuukam:

For: homoerotic courtship battles go brrr you can't tell me Fuuma didn't want to get into Kamui's pants and there was no reason for Kamui to dress like a whore if not for Fuuma's gaze check and mate you feral pspssps kitty kitty

Against: no force on planet would have stopped Fuuma from licking and biting Kamui he too would have turned into vampire. Unless Kamui put muzzle on him and rode him like a champion

[midnightdemonhunter]

GOD THAT WAS GREAT !!! I'M ACHING !!!!! fuckin UHHHHH could we hear some about mikan & junko too then? junko & sonia? junkoooooo & akane & nekomaru? the last two in particular i always struggle with thinking of as despairs, & i'd love to hear your takes on them & literally any fleck of the remnants you want to discuss <3

THANK YOU!!!! I spend my days constantly thinking about Junko with class 77 and the remnants, so I'm absolutely delighted to get the chance to talk about them!! (put under Read More cause i have a LOT to say)

The big pain about Mikan and Junko to me is the idea that Junko is just NICE to her. Like she bumps into Mikan on her first day of school and laughs off Mikan's apologies. She says good morning to her every time they meet. She doesn't blink at Mikan's ramblings. Like she's giving Mikan a normal amount of attention and because Mikan is so starved for attention Junko becomes the love of her life. And it's like MAN she would have felt this way about whoever treated her like this and Junko just happened to be the first.

I think Junko's big thing pre-tragedy is to ask fucked up hypotheticals to everyone she knows, and she has a blast doing it with Mikan-- who's always happy to answer insane medical questions. And then after the tragedy...well Junko has always forgiven and embraced Mikan's worse traits-- surely Mikan owes her Beloved the same!

In terms of remnant Mikan...I feel like my ideas are the least revolutionary? She's one of the few remnants who 1. Has a reasonable amount of fics/art 2. Has a reasonable amount of GOOD fics/art So i don't have a lot of unique concepts with her?? I do absolutely love the idea that she is one of the less crazy remnants-- since for all we know, she's a mild one!

I really think Sonia would love Junko. Junko is a blunt, morbid person who would delight in Sonia's serial killer obsession, and they would have a great time binging horror movies and discussing Hypothetical Fights to the Death. Sonia is one of the many people Junko dates in the lost years, and they're sparkling blondes on the surface-- very violent cheerful conversations below it.

In the end...Sonia proposes to Junko, and offers her a spot on the throne. Junko happily accepts! Junko then precedes to happily kill herself in a very non hypothetical killing game, breaking Sonia's heart. Now Sonia is a bride abandoned at the alter, who wears her wedding dress permanently in honor of her departed love. She has BIG Mrs Havisham vibes.

I very much respect all Girlboss remnant Sonia concepts but unfortunately I have doomed her to be a sad girlfail girlcry. She finds the idea of anyone finding her attractive after Junko horrifying, and mutilates herself as a way of preventing this. She has chosen Junko over her kingdom, and she is very aware of this choice.

ARGH AKANE AND NEKOMARU. Honestly I agree with you, these two are really hard to nail down as remnants. Nekomaru especially, since he is both gay and seemingly very emotionally healthy, so it's harder to imagine him going to any of the lengths the remnants go to for Junko. However I try my best to justify and imagine it!!

In school, both Nekomaru and Akane were Junko's sparring partners. (separately). Nekomaru is very concerned about Junko but is also under the impression that he can fix her. HE CAN NOT. Junko wants to see how far she can push him in their fights, and how violent he can get with her. She'll leave their sparring sessions bruised and bleeding and beaming. Akane's sparring sessions are much less bloody, but much more homoerotic. Junko always loses the fights but wins the arguments.

Neither of them realise how much Junko means to them UNTIL she dies on live television. Nekomaru feels like he failed one of his athletes, and Akane only realises she was in love now that Junko's gone. Akane becomes determined to never get attached or become weak again, and stops eating. She avoids Nekomaru out of repressed guilt on how badly she's treating her body. She also kills a lot of people she used to care about as a way of cutting ties Whoops.

Nekomaru....is the most emotionally healthy remnant who moves in with Souda and is still happy but...he also cuts off his legs to replace them with prosthetics which contain Junko's bones so uh. There's that. He also really enjoys violence now! Thanks Junko!

Basically, I have pretty clear images on where Nekomaru and Akane are at Hopes Peak and as Remnants, it's just the inbetween I find hard.

Getting back to more general here, but I really do have a LOT of remnant thoughts, as you can see from my ask blog (which I'm very slow with but still remember) and all the fics I've written. Speaking of remnant fics, I'm gonna plug Those Who Carried On here because it's where I've started putting all my other standalone remnant concepts that exist basically to expand the possibilities of the remnants. That fic is a delight to work on and I very much want everyone to see it!

If you're interested in more of my remnant or class 77 Junko dynamic thoughts, please feel free to send more asks like this one! This is really only the tip of the iceburg, and I'd love to discuss my personal remnant ideas, the interpretations i love in the fandom and the ones I don't, as well as any other remnant/lost years concepts! (as well as my seething hatred of dr3) If you personally want to talk about this stuff more in-depth with me, hit up my tumblr dms and I can keep talking. I'd love to hear your thoughts as well! Once again, thanks for the ask and the excuse to ramble!

[onestowatch]

Our 10 Favorite Music Moments From Euphoria Season 2

Photo: HBO

Another season of Euphoria has come and gone, and people are still shocked by the dramatic events of season two. We saw the characters go through betrayal, growth, self-destruction; we even got an iconic dance number starring everyone's favorite underappreciated boyfriend, Ethan. (Yes, I'm an Ethan stan. He deserved better.)

Anyway, this season's soundtrack didn't fail in acting as a carefully curated vehicle to move the story forward sonically. Below are our top ten favorite music moments of Euphoria Season 2. 

Billy Swan - "Don't Be Cruel"

The season opens with an unexpected flashback of Fez's childhood. His gunslinging grandmother marches into the strip club and shoots Fez's father in the pelvis. When she walks back to the car, the line, "Baby, it's just you I'm thinkin' of," plays on the radio as she tells a bruised and battered Fez that he's going to live with her now, away from his cruel and abusive father, and kicking off the fate that is to befall our favorite, loveable drug dealer.  

Orville Peck - "Dead of Night"

In the first episode, Nate drives Cassie to the New Year's Eve party. Unfortunately, he speeds up to 100mph, and as a result, she spills her drink all over herself. Nevertheless, the tension between them builds, leading to them getting together behind Maddy's back. "Dead Of Night" is about a whirlwind romance that ultimately ends in tragedy, foreshadowing what's to come.

Gerry Rafferty - "Right Down the Line"

The song, which was featured in the official trailer, makes two distinct appearances this season. In episode one, the song plays when Rue and Fez are told to strip by Laurie and company. In episode two, it plays when Rue ditches dinner with Jules to do drugs with Elliot. "Right Down The Line" is a mellow and vulnerable song that describes how Gerry feels about his lover. Gerry suffered from alcoholism for most of his life, and in the song, he praises his lover for helping him through the dark times in his life, saying she is the only one he can "lean on."

Lil Xan and Noah Cyrus - "Live or Die"

While in a somewhat comatose state, Nate fantasizes about Cassie and the life they could have together. The montage includes scenes of a pregnant Cassie and her subsequently giving birth. Given that this song is sung by a couple that didn't last, it only foreshadows just how doomed this toxic relationship is from the start.

INXS - "Never Tear Us Apart"

After their high school graduation, Cal and Derek seek shelter from a storm in a gay bar. After a fair share of drinks, the two best friends dance with each other, culminating in them giving into their repressed desires and ultimately kissing. But unfortunately, this is Euphoria and lovers do get torn apart once Cal finds out that his girlfriend and future wife, Marsha, is pregnant.

Bobby Darin - "Call Me Irresponsible"

While high, as per usual, Rue lip-syncs and dances around her house with a pillow to the appropriately named song, making a mess in the process.

Ben E. King - "Stand By Me"

In episode six, Fez and Lexi watch the ‘80s classic Stand By Me and sing along to the song. Lexi later talks about the play that she's poured her heart and soul into, lamenting over everything she couldn't say to everyone's faces and wonders if it may do more harm than good. Fez reassures her that no one will have a problem if the stage production is anything like the movie.

Bonnie Tyler - "Holding Out For A Hero"

It only makes sense that Lexi incorporated this ‘80s hit into her play. Kat's ex-boyfriend Ethan, who single-handedly played most of the characters in the play, lip-synced his heart out to this hilarious and entertaining homoerotic dance number, earning himself a standing ovation for his performance. Ethan proves what we knew all along; he truly is a hero.

Dominic Fike (written by Zendaya and Labrinth) - "Elliot's Song" 

The touching scene shows Elliot apologizing to Rue for worsening her addiction issues and betraying her by telling Jules and Rue's mom Leslie that she had been using. As part of this apology, he sings a song he's "still working on" for her, accompanying himself on guitar. It’s a tender, heartbreaking send-off to a friend.

Zendaya and Labrinth - "I'm Tired"  

This grand, church-inspired song is ethereal yet grounded. In episode four, a high and emotionally and mentally exhausted Rue is caught in a surrealistic memory of her late father and walks through church doors, passing by an entire congregation. At the front of the imaginary church stands Labrinth himself, singing "I'm Tired," a song he co-wrote with Zendaya and Levinson. The singer then transforms into her father, and she cries and apologizes for not being a good person. In the finale, Rue shares in the closing narration that she stayed clean the rest of the school year and wants to continue working towards being a good person.

[moash]

Do you have Kalmoash headcanons?

oh you know it. hard to like make a solid list though bc it's mostly all just nebulous emotions in my head. i might have more clear and articulate answers to more specific questions about them, but. one little one is that moash whittles from his days on caravans and he made kaladin a little chull, and it sits next to tien's horse. tien making a horse is like fanciful creative imaginative, whereas moash making a chull is like these are the beasts of burden right, like this is the working animal that pulls caravans. symbolism.

canonically i think moash and kaladin did not actually get together in wor (unlike in my fic, please read, where they kiss, that was like an au where kaladin is 10% less repressed) i feel like their relationship is more like repressed gay homoerotic friendship where you both know whats up but nobody says it and you're just obsessed with each other (flora, if you're reading this, call me, i forgive you). i mean like they may have done things, but if they did, they wouldn't have talked about or acknowledged it imo. them not really having gotten together or defined what their relationship/feelings were makes it all the harder to talk about it now right? like how do you tell someone else what this specific friend meant to you, how do you even really define it to yourself, when the only word you can rightly use is friend?

my brain also tends to focus on like character specific headcanons that may relate to each other, rather than relationship specific headcanons. like moash strikes me as the kind of person who's had a lot of failed relationships where he's like "this is the one!!!" and it's like NEVER the one and always a bad pick, like the kind of guy who will steal all your money and frame you for arson. so with kaladin he was like "this is the one" but it was like, this time it was not a bad pick, kaladin is the one, and it still gets fucked up. i love tragedy <3 kaladin on the other hand has failed relationships w women bc he's gay and unable to admit he's gay so he just keeps having failed relationships with women. idk if you've ever watched please like me, i watched some in college, but the opening scene (first two minutes of this) is the main character's gf dumping him and telling him he's probably gay. that was just word for word kaladin and lyn's breakup pre-row in my mind.

ultimately im a canon compliant bitch at heart, so i get more enjoyment out of like extrapolating lines from canon into bigger things than inventing new things of my own, if that makes sense? feel like i've rambled nonsensically for like a good while so i'm gonna stop now lol, but those are i guess some general concepts(TM), feel free to ask me specific things that might like jog a specific line of thought, ya know? <3 <3 <3

[vaguely-concerned]

X-men Evolution; the great 2021 rewatch liveblog

exactly what it says on the tin, about halfway through the show I had TOO MANY FEELINGS and had to start writing some of them out haha (gets quite gambit & rogue/gambit heavy in the latter half, Because of Who I Am as a Person)

- this is my childhood’s x-men, my formative experience with them, and I’m happy to report that still seems like a good thing. the little eleven year old within me gets to geek out and have a good time with the characters and the surprisingly good animation and writing, adult me gets to CACKLE at regular intervals at the fashion/technology/absolute bonkers hot garbage comic book nonsense they use to justify a storyline every now and then, it’s been a good time 

- I was like ‘ah well it is super dated it probably won’t be quite the same now’ and then rogue’s HAIR did the THING in the opening and ‘it’s all coming back to me now’ started playing in the background... the little baby queer in me swooning across time and space

- such a good beast, both his design and the writing, my heart aches for him all the time. he’s just so passionate! about being a teacher! helping young humans learn the stuff they’ll need in life! the most wonderful nerd man, just let good things happen for him

- I’m going to go ahead and assume that rogue’s ‘crush’ on scott is more of a deeply complex psychological process about desiring normalcy and intimacy and trying to figure out if she’s queer and dealing with her emerging sexuality and latching on to the first and best safely unavailable and nonthreatening older boy to project these issues onto rather than actually being a real thing, because I respect her so much as a person and I cannot bring myself to imagine she’s honestly attracted to a man who has POSTERS OF CARS on his bedroom wall. (I’ll give jean a break just because she seems to have a longer deeper history with him that might counteract some of that libido-kill, and also she’s a jock so lol)

like I am very sorry but can u imagine being a teenage girl with any interest in a boy with model cars in his bedroom when gambit’s swanning around being a much, much, much worse choice on almost every possible level but in a teen girl kryptonite kind of way? inconceivable  

(I drag scott quite a few times in this and it’s not because I don’t love him, it’s just his tragedy to be the most draggable man in the world)

to be fair by the time gambit shows up that whole Situation has mostly played itself out I suppose but still  

- toad’s design is so ineffably brilliant, I can’t quite tell you why but that ugly cute charm has really stuck with me, he’s one of the characters I remembered the best to this day just visually

- poor evan... he truly never had a chance, did he, they just saddled him with the most 90s teen bullshit they could come up with like he’s some kind of ‘what adult writers think teens like’ frankenstein’s monster ;______; it’s not your fault honey

- poor poor POOR storm, she gets one focus episode and they were like ‘we’re going to make an episode so racist -- ‘

I’m still STUNNED at how bad it was, but undeniably I laughed hysterically to the point that my neighbours were probably worried when that dude was earnestly like ‘He [stunningly breathlessly racist caricature of a ‘witch doctor’ guy] has stolen her powers, and he’s going to use them to take over Africa!!!’ fhajsdlfhsakjldfh oh really? tell me more, like how the fUCK this could be on television within my life time fasdlfhsdkjfhsad f  just... fahjksdfh

- it’s a testament to gambit’s appeal as a character that his charm can survive what they’ve done with his hair and beard choices in this one fajskfhs regrettable but true I still fuckn LOVE him and in my highly biased yet Correct opinion he should have been around much more. get you a man who manages to stay hot through sheer Vibes even with a bowl cut

- aw scott/jean is kind of sweet in this show even if it’s taking them forEVER to get there, I like it 

- it’s very nice of rogue to not mention magneto’s romantic daydreams and nostalgic memories about charles xavier after touching his face that one time... or maybe her brain did her a service and repressed it, there’s some stuff you shouldn’t have to know about your father figure   

- the danger room is the very definition of ‘why do we even have that lever’ and I wonder what the fuck prof x does to have enough money to replace everything that gets busted all the time

- I’d say that a lot of the writing holds up surprisingly well! (but some of it is also incredibly inexcusably racist in ways that beggar belief, so... not full marks here) the characters have distinct voices and their arcs are set up and delivered on solidly for the most part, and there’s a lot of love showing through in small moments that are just there to have a funny/interesting thing to say about the characters and how their powers work separately and in combination. listen, sometimes I get so thirsty for like. basic goddamn competency in storytelling, let me have this

- ugggggh why is there captain america in my x-men have I not suffered enough... very very funny when prof x goes ‘sounds like you knew rogers personally’ and logan is like ‘I did ;)’ *all the students ganging up on steve rogers* “did you fuck our teacher, captain america?!”

- fskadfhas WHY are you showing me hot young-ified magneto’s ass fksjahfskj charles is not even here to see it, what a tragic waste erik 

- ...I was sort of kidding before but uh I think logan genuinely did fuck captain america (or at least wishes very much that he did lol)

- wanda can have a little watching the world burn. as a treat for the way every single adult in her life has fucking failed her (’aren’t they treating you well here’ professor x she’s in a straightjacket)  

- poor rogue tho can you imagine finding out after your biggest crush on a girl yet that she’s your fucking MOM in disguise... I would break out in cold sweat every time I thought about a boob forever after

- well seems like they really just had all that homoerotic rivalry stuff between quicksilver and spyke in their first ep only to never do anything with that again ever?? I mean even without the gay undertone that seems like a dynamic you spent most of an episode setting up writers what the hell haha

- dslhfkasjlh GAMBIT THERE HE IS MY BOY IS ON THE SCENE THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!! I don’t even care about his awful hair situation or the fact that his eyes are wrong here (coloured contact lenses, maybe, for a watsonian explanation? though he’d probably have to get them made special, considering he needs the sclera and the iris covered up in different ways, I’ve seen some comic panels indicating he has been known to?)

(cute little detail: when he shuffles the cards the first time we see him he ends with removing the top card to show the ace of hearts beneath <3 foreshadowing baBEY he’s a... good-ish boy deep down. hey he tries okay shit gets complicated sometimes lol) 

- cracking UP at gambit perched cheerily on the edge of a crate dispensing cards in the middle of the battle... he’s like ‘eh it’s a livin’ sfsajkhf remy stop working for supervillains just because you had nothing to do on a thursday afternoon and they said they’d pay you

- I’m guessing magneto must have imposed a strict order of silence on these guys or something because I cannot imagine any other reason for him to shut up, especially once he notices rogue is a QTE (or, far more likely, they hadn’t settled on any voice actors for the new characters until next season haha. it is kind of odd that they’re all keeping up near monastic silence, though, even sabertooth lol) 

- WHAT an epic first meeting for us rogue/gambit fans here... first his shadow like there’s fireworks going off behind him lighting him up and then he gives her the fuckn king of hearts and she’s so enchanted by his dumb handsome face she doesn’t even notice it’s about to blow up in her hands and it all happens in heavily meaningful silence afjsdfjashjk no wonder this ship ingrained itself in my hindbrain  

yeah look smug while you can remy she’s gonna have you on your knees one day and you’ll be happy about it lol

- god storm is so COOL, everything just fading out of focus when she really gets going... give her more screen time, show!!

- mystique is every person... this person... that person... that bird... that cat... that wolf... I’m not even sure she’s not also me... are you sure she’s not you? 

- holy fuck I respect the hell out of the decision to just... blow up the entire status quo in a season ender, I only vaguely remembered that (actually in general I appreciate how good the continuity is -- buildings and places that get damaged in battles need to be repaired or rebuilt, it makes the consequences feel more real even when no one gets seriously hurt. where they get the money to restore scott’s car and logan’s motorbikes every time they go cablooie is still an open question tho lol is it credit card fraud, professor? is it telepathically acquired blackmail???) 

- I first watched this when I was nine or so, so it’s a real experience to go from my starry eyed intrigued ‘oh my god... they’re teenagers’ to my horrified adult perspective of ‘oh my god... they’re TEENAGERS D:’

that goes double for the brotherhood boys honestly, I’m here with tears in my eyes like ‘I’m sorry the system has failed you so badly you’re all just a bunch of dumb kids whose caretakers clearly fucked up spectacularly’  

like lance is always waiting for mystique to come back because she’s the closest thing he has to a safe parental figure, may we speak about how crushingly depressing that is 

- rogue is so ready to throw hands at literally any moment and for that I love and treasure her immensely (I think getting to see her be so surly and unreasonable and sometimes difficult and jealous, like any teenager, meant a lot to me as a kid who was not really allowed to be any of these things, this version of the character has stayed with me so deeply. she holds on so fiercely to her right to feel what she feels and be what she is even when it’s ‘ugly’ or unreasonable, which I think plays in really interestingly with how her powers involve getting invaded by other people’s thoughts and memories to the point of overwhelming her own sense of self and the fact that she clearly has a lot of self-loathing and self-consciousness and confusion about her identity as well. I love her so much)  

- oooof this is the ‘the gang experience a microaggression’ episode huh (well more like macroagressions really)

hits a bit different with adult eyes and perspective huh

- hearing jean sound almost like a child when she says ‘that’s so unfair!’ somehow has me like ;______; -- she has to be so adult and responsible all the time, and having her be reduced to the kid she still is and should get to be in front of this awful awful man she could squash like a bug with the flick of a thought... ugh I’m Big Sad (it is funny that jean seemingly plays Every Sport tho djfhaskj)

- MY BOY IS BACK!!! this time with the duster coat and his eyes the right colour, im so happy (too bad about the subdued colour scheme tho; I adore his dumb bright pink getup with my whole heart)

it’s kind of adorable that he takes the time to take the bullies aside and go ‘I know these guys can’t wreck you without getting expelled, but I think you’ll find no law set down by god or man would stop me from doing so whenever I wanted to. so piss off and leave them alone’ lol he’s looking out for them, in his own way

- in this episode: remy lebeau wrangles some kids while looking bored yet mildly amused the whole time. what the fuck does magneto have on you for you to agree to this level of babysitting duty buddy

- fun detail I noticed b/c when I get a fave I hyperfixate: he gave rogue the king of hearts before, but he ‘introduces’ himself to the brotherhood here (lol) with the jack of hearts, probably to symbolize he’s here as someone who works for magneto in this setting and not as his own man? it’s a demotion he’s given himself there, anyway, might be he’s not very pleased about his current position huh 

- I like it when rogue and kitty team up, they’re not very effective together but their squabbling is so cute and non-aggressive 

- pietro is what draco malfoy would be if I ever found malfoy interesting to watch for even one moment, every time quicksilver talks I’m like ‘what wonderfully insufferable thing is going to come out of your mouth this time you little shit :’)’

- a) why are scott and logan shirtless for this scene? I am not complaining on the logan side of things at least but why and b) I laughed so hard I almost fell off my couch when scott asked logan if he’d ever been in love and he was like ‘once. she was the most beautiful bike I ever saw’ falsdfhaskjfhsakjlfhasklhjfd THE BEST VERSION OF WOLVERINE EVER, ACCEPT NO SUBSTITUTES 

- mystique’s sheer dedication to being a petty bitch is kind of inspirational tbh, almost makes me want to go on a completely bonkers and extra crusade of personal revenge myself  

- oooh they’re doing some genuinely cool things with vision/lack of vision in this one (it’s the scott left on his own in the desert without glasses one btw) even visually, dang! I’m so sad this show didn’t get more seasons than it did, honestly, it deserved it

- hell yeah jean wreck her, go get your man with the suspiciously specific clothing damage normally done to female characters 

awww :’) okay yeah they’re super sweet, I love the tiny loving animation details like how he leans his head against her and her stroking his hair away from his eyes

- nooo don’t bully evan leave my t0tally r4dical sk8er boy alone :(

- I love the running joke of people fleeing in blind panic only to reveal that what they’re running from is kitty’s cheerful well meaning little face fskfaskh 

- scott and jean are already peak married after officially being together for one episode and it’s adorable, and they just stone cold threw logan under the bus, rip wolverine we hardly knew ya

fjasdlfasldfhslajdkfhsadkjlfhsdkjalfhsdakfh h jean establishing herself as the alphabitch of this relationship by throwing her man to the wolves right after dsjfhaskjfhaskjhfsakjdhfaskjhfaskdhfskjahfskdajhf get smarter or get volunteered scott 

- ...eyepatch lady is so hot ngl

oh evan went to the place hank used to go to calm down ;________; (honestly he’s kind of won a place in my heart just by being a pretty normal teenage boy haha)

- jesus fucking CHRIST can you imagine being storm having to look her sister in the eye as she tells her ‘I lost your only child, he’s *vague gesture* somewhere in the sewers we think’ this poor woman

- amanda the self admitted monster fucker you are so VALID (I love her and her family’s design so much tho!)

- it’s so cool that even in his human ‘disguise’ kurt’s fingers follow the shape of his actual hand beneath it rather than moving like a five fingered hand, it’s such a lovingly consistent little detail 

- magneto and mystique in a breathless race to see who can be the shittiest parent... tune in next week for yet another parental nadir (also some low-poly gambit appearances in this one, for those at home keeping score (me), he’s in the background looking like someone drew him with their eyes closed fakjldfhasd look how they massacred my boy)

- someone please teach the brotherhood boys about consent huh

- jean ‘soccer mom before her time’ grey and her SUV dfhakjlhds :’)

- im sobbing rogue baby girl i’m so sorryyyyyy, this voice actress is so good, my parental instincts suddenly kicked into overdrive hearing the crack in her voice :( (bb me was right tho rogue centric episodes ARE the best episodes. that tension between ���do I identify witn this character or am I crushing on her?? both???’ now has the fun new addition of ‘oh god oh no you are a baby I want to shield you with my body from everything trying to hurt you’)

- mystique is like ‘so you see despite you telling me you never wanted to see me again I completely disrespected that and posed as a friend your age, manipulated you by offering you the mirage of direly needed emotional intimacy and belonging and added some sprinkles of homoerotic tension to it just to massively worsen your already existing grievous psychosexual trauma and identity issues... out of love’

god go jump in a black hole you fucking monster 

- there’s some very interesting and quite subtle subtext about the people she’s morphing into and what that says about her mental state/how it shows off some of her emotional baggage with the rest of the team. it’s like she’s switching between people/powers that fit the purpose as if she’s going through cycles of fight/flight (and then bursts of freeze where she’s herself, which is... so sad)

- this whole episode is hurting my heart but rogue at full power is undeniably epic  

 - ‘professor x get your goddamn act together and get this poor girl some fucking tHERAPY’ challenge

- SAFE PAPA LOGAN ;_____;

- EYYYYYY opening straight on My Lad, I cannot stop winning!!!!! 

fasdfhsad disintegrating the window with a smiley face... remy I do love you more than my heart can bear honestly, hello may we speak about the fact that his urge to be a little shit is so deep and strong it survives mind control (that little breathed out ‘hiah!’ as he vaults the fence too dsakfjsd)

hahaha and he does up the coat fhsalfdsaj 

- magneto dismissing other telepaths like ‘puh-lease, your Meaningful Looks have got nothing on my ex-husband’s’ 

- :’) rogue and kurt sibling timeees

- say what you want but this pyro guy’s got job satisfaction in being a creepy arsonist with a weird recurring horse theme (well at least twice but still weird)

- I love how beast is the kindest man to ever walk the earth but also straight up savage, this man drags people so hard their ancestors wince in their graves

- gambit taking the time to complete the guard’s game of solitaire -- this episode is giving me everything I want. u little disgrace mr lebeau

and THEN he takes the spider out in the most hilariously bonkers way my heart is so FULL

(I love that when magneto moves by he looks startled and has to quickly move his head out of the way to avoid getting kicked in the temple too that’s a fun detail)

I’m so INTO how this sequence shows off that his greatest strength isn’t even his powers (which are pretty straightforward, really, he makes go boom, longer time and bigger thing bigger boom) but that he’s clever and creative and always extremely ready to be the most harebrained-bananapants-extra-in-a-deceptively-laidback-sort-of-way person in the room (I actually have some genuinely Deep Thoughts about how his whole character does a really interesting thing with having the straightforwardly destructive nature of his powers yield to what his nature as a person is, and how using the playing cards play (heh) into it, maybe I’ll write it out some day. just the fact that he could use anything, but he deliberately chose something that adds style and playfulness and corny charm to it and that also limits the damage of the explosions compared to if he habitually used something with more mass... I find it fascinating how much he’s made a story around himself with it and how deeply it shows he does have a good heart, at the end of the day, in almost a metatextual way. he doesn’t want to destroy things or people, he’s at worst (and best lol) a thief.)

- I honestly have literally no memory of white nick fury (which seems so weird now isn’t it funny) in this series from when I was a kid, he clearly did not make an impression on me lol

- mr wolverine ‘assigned canadian at birth’ x-men 

- oh man I dig the androgynity of x-23′s outfit (even tho they had to compensate with the long hair, which... kind of doesn’t make sense in-universe but does on a design level because it’s a crucial thing that she’s a female clone of logan so yeah okay fine whatever have your arbitrary gender markers if you must haha)

ooooooh that’s actually really clever, they make her gender gradually more obvious as she unravels through the episode and her outfit changes -- first the mask coming off, and then her jacket opening to show her silhouette more clearly, that’s cool!  

- my god what really sets this show apart is how much it invests in little character and relationship moments, it’s just so fucking GOOD! it gives laura looking in on those moments such depth and weight because it’s new to her but established to us as an audience, this is how you make found family devastating people (storm growing bonsai trees is so charming too haha) 

- ooof this is honestly quite harrowing 

SHE’S SO SMALL COMPARED TO HIM I’M CRYING (at least that part of his genes translated over faslkfsjdh short king, I say this with all the love and support of a fellow short monarch)  

- tabitha seems to just be running around doing precisely whatever the fuck she wants and you know what I support her even if she is an asshole her father left her a bunch of trauma and no fucks left to give 

- still thrilled about professor x explaining the spider key fuckup to magneto after the fact like ‘magnus you dumb bitch this is why we split up’ 

- awww kitty has anime and movie posters on her wall and sleeps with a stuffed toy :’)

-          remy                           rogue

                              🤝

doing completely unnecessary parkour around the brotherhood living room seemingly just for the hell of it... I’m not saying soulmates but fucking soulmates 

- fhsadkjlfhsakjldfhsadjkfhsdajkfh just as gambit’s soul-level need to be a little shit survived his bout of mind control, rogue’s deep and urgent desire to kiss gambit full on the mouth survived hers I can’t breathe

she looks so pleased with herself too GOOD FOR YOU GIRL at least get something out of this other than more trauma 

also not only the fact that he’s smart enough to figure out what’s going on (though he’s only partially right about who’s behind it. I do so enjoy gambit/mystique deep and sincere antipathy as a constant across all universes tho lmao pure wlw/mlm hostility) but also that he keeps fending her off like he’s not trying to hurt her even though she’s in nigh on unstoppable and invulnerable terminator mode... awww 

- gambit having absolutely no patience for wolverine and sabertooth’s bullshit macho-off and consistently being this little biker trio’s one brain cell is adding years to my life with every passing moment

his voice is a little different in these scenes too, a bit softer and less like he’s trying to impress someone, it’s nice

- hank: well I barely recognize any of these (completely made up) ‘ancient egyptian hieroglyphs’ but from what I can make out -- *proceeds to infodump a perfect coherent narrative* fjdhfak  

listen this whole thing is such nonsense on so many levels, I’m just turning my brain off so I won’t have to think about it okay, the compulsion to put ancient aliens in egypt haunts us as a culture 

- I am CACKLING about gambit in the snow after having to listen to these two chucklefucks ooze testosterone at each other for hours

he started out taking it in good cheer and is now reduced to ‘dieu would both of you just jump off this fUCKING mountain please’

- ah. a little oops-a-daisy there, we seem to have unleashed the apocalypse. please stand by (they really don’t pull their punches with the season cliffhangers in this show haha)

- opening the season on gambit’s merrily grinning face is the easiest way to gain my favour. yes good this season may commence 

baby u r my

 ANGELLLLLLLL

(he’s so cute here tho haha I think it shows the design isn’t unsalvagable, just get him better hair and stubble more like logan has and you’ve basically got it) 

love his exasperated eyeroll when the dude gets spooked (by his eyes? or just the general weirdness?) too

he’s just trying to keep this crazy family of evil mutants together and unmurdered by one another until they’ve managed to avert the end of the world, bless him  

- oh NO rogue’s LIP wobbles my hhhhhheart ;____; such a good animation detail to put in

- like... I know kurt is just a sad scared teenager with a lot of shit going on and all the adults are too busy averting the end of the world to help him... but buddy maybe don’t ask your sister to wake her abuser (who forced her to kickstart the end of the world!!!!!) when she feels utterly unsafe even with her statue version around huh

- ...wanda is good and I want only good things for her. and for her dad to be disemboweled for what he did to her both the first time around and when he forced her to forget I mean what 

- magneto throwing an epic satelite-slinging tantrum b/c ‘no I am the biggest sexiest strongest mutant of the pack :(’... erik fucking get over yourself 

- yes boys absolutely go along with a plan suggested by a dude who looks at you like this 

nothing bad can come of this surely asdfkhsa

- lance’s quarter of a braincell always trying to go ‘hey wait, maybe... not do this???’ and it never helps lol

- in this episode: Logan Has A Bad Day 

...some very specific bondage positions he’s held in here, I am sure this episode awakened something in someone once upon a time lol 

- logan shielding x-23 with his body... im fine it’s okay I’m not crying don’t look at me

- afsdhlsdfjasdlk those sure are some ‘scottish’ accents flsadkjhkdsjahfsd

- scott relieved to finally be able to cede the position of ‘charles xavier’s least favourite son’ to someone else fjsaklfhsajd (poor scott it’s not your fault honey)

supremely cowardly to suggest there is an ex-wife involved rather than charles slutting his way around the british isles back in the day but okay

- kurt with a cold is the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. it’s okay kid it’ll get better soon

- ...is there an implication here that professor x is naturally blond. because I am losing my entire little mind about it (i mean he at least has to carry the gene, as does this lady?)

ETA: upon doing some research into this I can indeed confirm that charles xavier does seem to be naturally blond, and after this knowledge I will never be the same 

- “listen, dracula” fskdafghasd oh scott you sweet baby angel I love you

- I know jean’s abilities are a bit ‘as strong or as weak as the plot needs right now’ at this point (so you can have the setup for what’s going to happen with them eventually and she’s basically invincible ;____;), and normally I’m cool with it but god I want her to just squash lucas like a little bug

- ewwwww please don’t ever say ‘daddy’ like that again

- ...what the fuck is even going on this episode’s a mess 

like okay the split personality thing could be something but the way it’s done... what just happened lol

- MY BOY EVAN IS BACK! with a real glowup too (...though kind of weird how he suddenly looks like a grown man)

- augh scott’s eyes are so pretty oh my god ;__________________________;

- that episode in the first season where evan makes the ‘this is my new family!!’ video is so sad now (also, again, his poor poor parents) 

- time for: life affirming road trip with gambit (involuntary) faskljdfhaskjd

stunt therapist remy lebeau 

- I mean the way he goes about it is batshit insane and it’s very much secondary to what he’s actually up to but this is the first time rogue’s sounded genuinely hopeful and confident and like herself in like a season <3 

- he is disconcertingly pleased about her nearly throwing him off the train, and may I just say I agree it’s so nice to see rogue with her old fire back 

- the first time I watched this it was of course dubbed into norwegian, so I had no idea either of these characters were southern lol (though to be fair I probably wouldn’t have had much context for what it meant exactly either, I was like ten at the time and not too interested in america) I seem to dimly remember the norwegian voice actor did a little more of a ‘french’-tinged accent for gambit all over tho haha  

- you know what respect where it’s due, pyro dude knows to live his life for the lols and one has to admire his sociopathic dedication to it

interesting that he, too, seems to have fucking hated magneto -- I wonder if the implication here is that he kept all the acolytes in line with blackmail or by keeping something/one hostage? (except sabertooth maybe he’d just have to say ‘you get to fuck shit up and fight wolverine’ and that’d be enough)

- fsdakfhsd he’s so focused on her he doesn’t notice that guy about to hit him fkafhsa 

- fuck everything else except whatever the hell these two’ve got going on

- it’s weirdly cathartic to have rogue have a conversation with someone who was not happily adopted as well, I don’t think kurt like. gets it because his parents loved him unconditionally and still do 

birds of a feather motherfucker  

- fun detail: when the x-men team are on the shore and logan is sniffing around scott is stepping in something and trying to wipe it off his boots in the background

- when he wakes up after passing out from the touch he’s smiling even though she’s standing over him looking like the rage of god outlined by the moon fsajfsa well the last time he passed out like that it was from a kiss, maybe he still has some hopes and dreams in that direction lol (also he recovers from the tumble down the hill first and is checking on her before accidentally brushing her cheek with his hand, which I thought was sweet) 

and it was in that moment he knew he fucked up *passes out*

- ‘I can explain’ can u remy. can u  

- did it ever even occur to you to just. ask her. to help you. I mean I know it didn’t but like rogue’s always one second away from throwing hands with some bully and is stupidly ride or die, if you’d given her the puppydog eyes she would have crumbled immediately (fair enough I guess this entire episode is telling us he’s not from a background where he has much experience with people just helping him without a price haha) 

- his eyes glowing when he’s angry or upset or using a lot of his power is undeniably cool as all hell. I’m just saying it would be Big Sexy if they sort of flickered with light in moments of genuine vulnerability okay  

- his coat... his coat is what makes the Silhouette tm and I could not be happier about it 

- another parent of the year contestant enters the running lol “hey remy have you ever considered that you’re more of a walking bomb factory than a person? that’s certainly how I think of you hahaha c’mon kid let’s go” 

- the running joke of jean luc getting dollar signs in his eyes seeing the other mutant powers and gambit being like ‘nO!!!!’ and pulling him along is amazing haha

- from the way he looks when he touches rogue accidentally and the way he talks to his dad I’m sort of getting the feeling this gambit might actually be a bit younger than he looks?

here too -- idk why but it’s making the ‘wait is he baby???’ alarms go off in my head haha. very early twenties at most. 

- and we’ve officially seen him with all the face cards in the heart suit folks! (yes this is the sort of thing my brain notices no I don’t know either)

- poor logan running his ass off this whole episode in a panic and then she’s like ‘nah he’s fine (in several meanings of the word ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ) please put him down’ hfaskfsda

- rogue without makeup!!! her eyes look so naked like this haha <3

- oooh here’s a really interesting thing that tickles my brain a bit in this specific part of the scene where gambit frees his dad -- the part where he’s leaning against the door frame waiting for jean luc, who’s about to suggest using the opportunity to ruin the rival gang from the inside rather than slipping away while they still can

from his expression here he knows what’s about to happen, what jean luc is about to say, and it’s clearly a ‘man who thought he’d lost all hope loses last additional bit of hope he didn’t even know he still had’ sort of situation. he KNOWS what jean luc is like, and it still hurts that he really, honestly can’t give him even this, can’t appreciate that remy’s already done all this shit for him when he extremely didn’t have to, without immediately (no really, it took him less than ten seconds to go there? jesus) demanding more.  

remy tells him “I’m just here for you” and jean luc does not understand it. remy seems to be sincere in this motivation -- rogue certainly thinks so, having experienced it second hand and found enough at least emotional merit in it to decide he was worth saving even after all his bullshit (lol a bit of a running theme maybe. I think it’s very telling that after she absorbed mystique she was like ‘what the FUCK you’re a fucking monster’, and after she absorbed gambit she went ‘you did the wrong thing for the right reasons’ after she got over the first wave of outrage) 

there’s also what he says as he stands there: “You don’t need me for that”, with the distinct implication that jean luc would only keep him around because he has a use for him and for no other reason -- and then jean luc shamelessly doubles down on that by specifying that it’s not even him he’s got a use for as such, just his powers. that’s some kicking puppies level of deliberately missing the point, it’s almost impressive in how cheerfully mean it is haha

this idea of using people is really important in this episode because remy’s doing basically exactly the same thing to rogue to begin with; it doesn’t really matter to his plan that it’s her that’s with him through this, just what her powers are. (I think it’s  p r e t t y  solidly implied that he does actually like her a lot outside of that too and maybe there is some comfort in having her around for this, but mostly he’s behind a smokescreen of lies through the whole thing sooo I doubt he’s even aware of it, honestly)     

but then it does matter that it’s her when she comes back for him, even after what he did. and unlike jean luc he understands what that means, that she did that for him, and that she didn’t have to. and instead of asking her for more, in return he gives her the thing it’s been established is what he considers the most valuable thing he has; his ‘last card’, the thing he’s credited with keeping him alive many a time, basically. it’s gone from using to mutuality, a tentative place of friendship, and at the end of the day he is a different man than his adoptive father, with a capacity for selflessness and love he lacks. which is of course some of the same stuff going on with rogue and mystique too, except rogue acted from a more fragile and unstable place and did something she regrets, or at least has a LOT of doubts about now, and she found some catharsis in helping someone make a different choice in a similar situation. man there’s some Stuff going on under the surface here haha

(by the way it’s a weirdly... meaningless yet intensely meaningful thing, the gifting of a symbol? of an idea? but he’s putting something very crucial of himself into her hands, is the subtext, and he expects her to understand, which she also does seem to do. at the beginning of the episode he’s proving that he’s seen something true about her -- “You’re such an unhappy girl”, knowing where she comes from, the way she’s mourning her lost confidence and autonomy with her abilities -- and here she’s proving she’s seen something true about him. :’) I wish this show had gone on long enough for this dynamic to progress, it’s really interesting and touching)   

- gambit dragging himself up onto dry land seeing someone approaching (to help?!): :D

gambit seeing that it’s logan and the look on his face: D: 

- rogue using her powers so confidently and fearlessly in this episode tho!!!! 

- *me crying* and then her FAMBILY comes to take her home and he says he’s looking out for her too and kurt still loves her even though they’re having a conflict thing between them and she’s finally able to use her powers without so much fear again and --

- ...did I just watch some baby lesbian love at first sight shit right now???  

- okay last two episodes let’s go

- HELL YEAH STORM (I love that she’s like ‘don’t give me a dumb order like that and I won’t have to disobey it’ too sdfjsaj) her voice has such command I’m usually very much not the ‘step on me’ type butttt

- y’know I feel like apocalypse’s main fault across all versions I’ve seen of him is that he’s like an immortal superpowered god king and he’s not even sexy. like at least make him hot if he’s going to be insufferable in every other way 

- also callout post for apocalypse: one time he made gambit into the Horseman of Death... and didn’t even make him sexy!!! you were handed remy lebeau, supreme bi disaster slut of the x men universe, and you couldn’t even make his brainwashed superpowered evil side hot?? a beautiful stubbled twunk with glowing red eyes and extremely charming :> face practically delivers himself into your hands and you do that to him???? I mean I’m sure apocalypse did some other bad stuff too but that was the worst one

(comics are so dumb y’all) 

- having to watch jean cry is emotional terrorism!! ;___; she has such older sister/mom energy, whenever she gets sad and helpless it hurts 

- oh, OH so PROFESSOR X you’ll make into a hunk and ~*strategically*~ rip his clothes to show off a nipple and a flawless pec in a way that makes me extremely uncomfortable because he’s like The Dad??? apocalypse you are rotten to the core this is unforgivable 

- so wait wanda never actually gets her real memories back. what the FuCk I hope that was a dropped storyline because they ended the show tragically prematurely rather than like. the plan

- why is spyke calling storm ‘storm’ show that’s his auntie o!! >:(

- as a society we need to acknowledge that apocalypse looks like a fucking clown

- ooooh yeah I have been thinking that this show’s greatest visual weakness so far has been not having a visual way to show telepathy/battles of the minds, but this is a pretty cool way to do it! better late than never

- I’m so happy rogue gets to end this herself, since she was forced into starting it against her will, it’s just nice and neat storytelling

- YEAH FUCKING TELL HER KURT AND ROGUE I AM SO PROUD OF YOU and she has the temerity to look pissed off oh my god

the only valid thing mystique has done in her entire life is be in love with destiny. literally everything else she gets up to is a travesty. like I know objectively she’s hot but my loathing for her stops me from even appreciating it. I do enjoy loathing her tho so please don’t change her haha

(a bit odd to have kurt’s attitude to her swing so much but I’m just going to assume he and rogue had a good long conversation after ‘cajun spice’ and that he understands what’s going on better now)

- this last part is such a cruel tease faskdfhsdaj ‘here are all the cool-ass things we had planned. sucks you never get to see it huh’ im devastated 

- magneto without his helmet and playing charmingly with children like charles is going ‘well at least I saved my marriage finally’ fsadkhfjsd (honestly tho I would be super interested in seeing how they’d redeem this magneto because he’s been a real bitch the whole time lol) 

there’s an interesting thing here where magneto looks down at wanda as the last thing he does on screen before this epilogue part (yeah I hope it fucking haunts you forever what you did to her erik you absolute piece of hot garbage) and the last thing charles does is look at jean b/c he knows what’s going to happen to her and it breaks his heart... Dramatic Parallells  

- just the hint of jean as the phoenix has me in full D:D:D: mode tho maybe I wouldn’t have survived it

- gambit in the last groupshot with his arm around rogue ;^) I mean I’m sure they’re headed for some turns and roundabouts along the way but what’s that thing she says as her wedding vow, that she’ll always find her way back? anyway that got me in my heart

- man I really wish this show had been given more seasons, we were barely even getting warmed up here :’(