#always loved that design in sb so wanted to try and see how he looked being moldy and old

[bxnnie-bxwl]

wanted to try and make a springtrap version of the spring bonnie in that old freadbears family diner poster in sb

[uroboros55]

carlance au

Listen i know i know but i just cannot take it out of my head...

Lance was with Nando for a few years but they broke up when Lance kept asking about marriage and starting a family and Nando said that he did not want kids lance is finally done waiting for Nando to change his mind

so they break up and Lance moves back to his dad so he can get his life back in order

and one night (like idk 2 months after the break up) his dad makes him go with him to some country club to play golf

and they find out their course has been double booked or sth (I KNOW NOTHING ABOUT GOLF SO SHUT UP) and they have to share with... Sainz Sr. and Jr.

and Lawerence and Carlos Senior know each other and are really happy to catch up while Lance does not really remember much about Junior (cause Lance might have been to a lot of galas and stuff as a kid but Senior rarely brought his kids over) only that he was older than Lance

and then he sees Carlos, in all his glory with the dark wind-swept hair and nice looking polo shirt and shorts that hug his hips, and lance.exe stops working for a minute

so does Carlos.exe cause he sees a tall dark-haired guy with the biggest eyes and he looks like a prince and he cannot really do anything until finally his dad slaps him on the shoulder and tells him to stop being weird and say hello

and carlos shakes Lawrence's hand but almost immediately he goes to Lance and when he takes his hand he just keeps shaking it saying how nice it is to meet him

and Lance is so smitten he cannot even find a word Carlos's hand is soft and warm and carlos keeps looking at him with his big eyes Lance just blushes while mumbling his name back

Lawerence & carlos Senior see all of that and are trying really hard not to laugh at their sons

the whole day carlos basically ignores the old men and just keeps close to Lance, talking with him and asking him all about his work (Lance is either an interior designer and carlos suddenly feels like he needs his whole house redecorated) and he keeps pushing lance clubs before lance can do anything

Lance for a while is nervous cause it has been so long since he talked to SB New but after a while, he lets his dry humor show and bickers with carlos

carlos keeps looking at Lance so much he barely concentrates on golfing and loses so badly but he cannot even try to get mad because Lance wins and his laugh when he finds out is so endearing to carlos

and during lunch later he keeps asking about Lance and everything Lance-related

when they finally say their goodbyes carlos asks for Lance's number so he can arrange a meeting cause he wants "to change his house quite a bit" "But last week you said you were pleased with your house" "Shut up Dad"

fast forward a few days carlos texts Lance and asks him for dinner

Lance is a bundle of nerves cause it has been so long since he was on a date with SB who isn't Nando (and truth be told the last date he had with Nando was the one when he broke things up)

Esteban has to get off work early to help Lance with his breakdown ("But what if he hates me when our dad isn't there to take away the attention?" "Lance he will love you, he didn't say more than hello and goodbye to your dad last time, he was so busy talking with you")

so finally Lance goes to the restaurant and he is so nervous and tries to not show it but the moment he steps inside the restaurant Carlos is there with flowers and he looks so good in his gray suit and he smiles so big when he sees Lance

and the whole night he is so sweet always asking about Lance and his family and he does want to learn more and more (he asks about uni and childhood and his family and pets and friends and keeps listening so intensely he sometimes forgets to eat his dish) but he also keeps talking when Lance asks him about sth and he looks like a happy golden retriever when Lance smiles at him

and when Carlos finally takes Lance's hand in his and smiles so sweetly Lance cannot really say anything for like 15 minutes cause he is speechless.

but later he tells Carlos that he needs more time cause he got out of a long relationship that he thought would be his last one and he is not yet ready to go straight into another relationship

and Carlos just nods and says "I can wait as long as you need to, just please let me stay close, we can go as slow as you want to"

when they finally leave the restaurant after like 3 hours they just walk for a bit, holding hands, not talking much but the whole time Lance blushes so prettily Carlos prays this night will never end

and when they finally say goodbyes Carlos just kisses Lance's cheek and hugs him

and when Lance finally calls Esteban to tell him about the date he keeps grinning like an idiot but Esteban is so happy his friend had such a great night

and ever since then Carlos has kept messaging Lance every day, and sometimes calls him; they see each other at least once a week but Carlos respects Lance's boundaries and he sticks to handholding, hugging and just being close to him

and Lance keeps opening up to him, letting him more and more

WHILE he still gets time to meet with Esteban Mick and all his friends and one night they go clubbing cause the last time they did it was even before Lance met Nando and he sometimes misses just being able to dance with his friends without caring about a world

and they have so much fun, drinking and dancing Lance feels so good but there is one missing thing and it is Carlos

and he decides to go outside to make a call but before he can he collides with sb chest and it's... Carlos? who looks so good in his black shirt and swept hair and he hugs Lance before saying his hellos and asking what he is doing here

turns out Carlos's friend Lando is a DJ and Carlos went here with his friend to support him

so soon Carlos mets Esteban and Mick and invites them to their table to meet Carlos's friends: Max, Teto, and Lando who is taking a break from djing for a while

and Lance is a little bit worried that Carlos will soon forget about Lance and focus on his friends, but Carlos does the opposite and sits next to Lance, brings him drinks, and always makes sure Lance is in the convo, even explaining some of the inside jokes he has with his friends

Carlos's friends are funny and they get on with Mick and Esteban it warms Lance's heart

and when Lance finally gets the courage to ask if Carlos wants to dance with him Carlos just smiles so widely that Lance has to laugh

and turns out that Carlos has two left feet but he is so enthusiastic about dancing with Lance that it's not really a big problem for Lance

when they finally get off the floor Lance asks to get outside instead of joining their friends and Carlos just takes his hand and takes them outside they just spend a few minutes sitting close to each other and Lance can feel how warm is Carlos next to him. and he never really had that with Nando cause he always wanted to go to the next place, do sth else

and this is the moment when Lance realizes he is falling in love with carlos and he cannot really wait any longer

so he just turns his head and takes carlos face in his hands and kisses him

and he can hear carlos quite surprised gasp before he lays his hands on Lance's hands and asks if he's sure lance just nods while trying to stop smiling and carlos is also smiling before going back to kissing Lance

kissing Carlos is one of the best things Lance ever did

cause carlos lips are soft and plum and he tastes like the beer he had typically Lance does not drink beer but this time he does not mind

and Carlos seems to be reading his mind cause he moves the way Lance likes and never pushes for more just follows Lance's lead

and Lance really wants to kick himself that he made them wait this long to finally kiss

that's all i have for now that i can share but i have been obessed about this since this morning

[just-a-floofy-catt]

I took a bit of a break from posting cus im tired as balls atm lmao

But i wanted to atleast chuck something out today so heres the ref/original idea sheet of Avery, my fnaf sb self-insert/oc from a while ago :)

(Ive already kinda shown this b4 but now it just looks nicer)

(And has all the writing stuff below the pic in this post)

Also here's some bonus info on him and his role and all :)

• Hes a trans dude (he/they pronouns) that "is built like a twink and dresses like a femboy" (silly quote from my friend lmao😭), and has an extremely ambiguous voice - British accent btw (grew up in the UK, he moved over to his current residence and lives w a roommate who was his online friend).

• Hes can occasionally be a lil bit of a freak behind the scenes XD. Has indulged in alot of fanfiction, draws some questionable stuff for money and also generally can have pretty crude and vulgar humor sometimes lmao.

• Hes pretty creative with a long ass list of hobbies. Loves fashion and costumes, is an artist, avid sewer and just generally loves making things with his hands in his spare time (100% brings his crochet to work XD)

• Has almost crippling anxiety about literally almost everything.

• Hes very polite and tolerates alot of bullshit to avoid conflict, but inside he is 100% raging with the heat of 1000 suns despite the fact hes outwardly shaking enough to be practically vibrating. He will definitely talk shit about the situation to himself in great, excruciating, dramatic detail with alot of angry cursing later and then probably cry about it.

• The boi is a little try-hard that will do their job above minimum effort in order to get praise, or out of fear for getting in trouble.

• Hes typically empathetic to a fault and a straight up (un)qualified therapist.

• Oh, also, hes a raging insomniac.

- First got the job because art commissions were a little slow and, hey, a more reliable source of money at the time wouldnt hurt.

- He was always kinda curious about the place because the scary stories about it were fun to pick apart and he loved the designs of all the animatronics (pft furry).

- He showed up to the interview scared shitless but they hired him almost on the spot, much to his confusion, as he was probably less than entirely qualified for this sort of job.

- From his very first day, he showed up pushing the dress code XD. But, he was indeed wearing the uniform, so he was technically following the rules(THEY COULDNT DO SHIT TO HIM 🥰) (well they could) (but the understaffing issue was more prioritised).

- His coworkers genuinely have no fucking clue how he manages to give enough of a shit to put that much stuff on every morning. The fits are always very over the top, considering all he had to do was put the damn uniform on, but alas, he usually showed up in head to toe accessories and such. It's honestly the best way he can make himself go into work. If he's gonna work a kinda shitty job that doesn't fit his schedule that well and have to do it on barely any sleep, THEN FUCK YEAH HES GONNA DO IT WHILE LOOKIN GOOD. Thats his philosophy on it, atleast XD.

- At first while he settles into the job hes just given shifts in general areas, working joint shifts with more trained security guards or maintenance people or animatronic handlers (those were his favourites. He always got excited like a little kid when getting to see any of the animatronics) to get him used to the place.

Fazbear ent. Was clearly desperate for employees as they were almost always understaffed, but it seemed that they weren't willing to give many employees a strict job role. Rather, expecting them to be a jack of all trades as to try and fix that little issue.

This also happened to apply to Avery, explaining why he was given such oddly scattered and different jobs to settle him in.

- Even as he did start becoming independent, this didnt much change.

One night he could be watching security cameras in the office, the next he could be counting stock at a gift shop, the next he could be helping out with minor maintenance tasks on the robots (despite his ZERO FUCKING KNOWLEDGE ON THEM. Great job there Faz.Ent. Oh well. As time went on he did get atleast a little accustomed to it and managed not to electrically fry his no-robotics-degree-having ass. And he also gained a bestie in the Parts and Services Department, so that was pretty helpful too).

Shit was pretty damn good.

- Thats when they 'suddenly' decide that daycare security is necessary. Something about parents becoming increasingly weary of the odd 'Daycare Attendant' animatronic.

With Avery being their newest hire and most likely to agree to take the position, he immediately gets targeted.

- Now, Avery isnt fond of kids.

Theyre annoying little shits.

So the second he hears 'daycare' hes like "fuck no".

Not to mention that his uh... 'look' (that management had still protested until eventually giving up) would probably set off some entitled mothers or something, and he'd rather not have parents screaming in his face about it.

- Alas, hes eventually convinced into it, under the condition that he gets to stay behind the security desk and not be bothered at all.

- Theyve had security there before, after a few... incidents... but it seemed like they were putting him on a more long term intended job.

- Turns out, from what he can gather from coworkers, a few people have been assigned to the daycare in the past for multiple different roles, but noone really enjoyed it and everyone avoided the place as much as possible. Sun just generally freaked everyone out with that weird... desperation he always had (which was definitely a part of what the parents had also been complaining about) and Moon just scared them all shitless, with the night security guards always looking over their shoulder in hopes of not crossing patrol with him. Noone really downright hated them, some even felt sympathy, but most were just too unsettled to interact with them.

- Avery, being a bit of a pussy, is even further put off from the job by these sentiments.

However, he perseveres and dresses his best to try and convince himself that itd be fine (aka, that if he died atleast hed die pretty).

- The daycare actually had its own themed uniform alongside the plain guard uniform, as did alot of other places in the pizzaplex. However, since the employees were given a choice, basically everyone chose to not don the more whimsical fits, and instead just use their badge to show the specific job or branch they were supposed to be legally assigned to.

- Avery, on the other hand, fucking lived for that shit. XD

Styled it like a girlboss and walked into work at exactly 6.30am, 30 minutes before the daycare opened, prepared to look perfectly the part for his job.

- When he walked into the daycare (he avoided the slide... hm.. maybe if he ever has a night shift here....) and the lights were already on and bright enough to blind a bitch.

Oh well, their electric bill, not his problem.

- He immediately settled behind the desk, planning to keep his ass planted there for the next few hours with one earbud in, hidden under his hair, as he would halfheartedly watch the kids.

But...

Something felt off.

Really fucking weird.

He was definitely being *watched*.

Observed.

Ugh, creepy.

He ignored it, blaming it on lack of sleep.

And thats about as far as i got plan wise for his lil plotline XD

Yippee

[way2gosuperrstarr]

going to put answers to these under the cut so this doesnt look obscenely long to whatever poor person's feed this pops up on . im sorry lol

1) my best friend wanted to watch a security breach playthru since it had just released when we were together for a couple days, so we did !!! the second i saw them in the daycare section i was like . HELL YEAH . id never consumed any fnaf content before sb, but security breach was the pipeline that got me into watching playthrus of every fnaf game and consuming so so many lore videos about everything and honestly now i'd say fnaf is like one of my biggest interests. its kinda funny how that turned out :')

2) i have no idea but they instantly won me over w their (mostly sun's) swagless charm, and (both of their) goofy ass looks. god theyre such losers . also i FUCKING LOVE HALF AND HALF CHARACTERS !!!!!! makinf a character half and half colors is a straight away way to make me love them !!!!! so much !!!!! i also love celestial themes !!!!! i LOVE!! THE !!! SKY !!!!!! at work i get to see sunsets when we walk the dogs at the end of the day (and sometimes when im scheduled in the morning i see sunrises) and it makes me SO HAPPY

3) since the release of security breach :]

4) not yet !!!!!! i havent been able to afford a computer yet, and in the same vein i havent been able to afford the fnafsb switch port for my nintendo switch. yet, at least !! i do hope to experience it on an actual computer though, eventually.

5) probably just my designs :') im not the best at like ...... tryly communicating my scenario ideas its something im trying to work on. i also just get ....... really embarrassed.

6) im not picky tbh !!! but i looooove just like. cute stuff :3

7) no answer for this one. yet, at least!

8) YES !!!!!!!! my baby cloudy. i absolutely LOVE them so fucking much. i made them shortly after sb's initial release its been about twice years with them <3 theyve gone thru countless redesigns and are currently going thru one now but ive always loved then thru each one <33 im still working on my sona. been doing it since like the beginning. i have a hard time w sonas haha

9) THEYRE SO STINKING CUTE I DONT CARE WHAT ANYONE ELSE SAYS . THEYRE SOOOO ADORABLE WITH THEIR CANON DESIGN MODELS

10) just seeing everything everyone else makes. something about it just makes me feel like. really happy. and just seeing like ...... the community that's formed.

11) thats a hard one </3 idk maybe like ..... sun . im sorry moon :(

12) I LOVE HIM . HES PERFECT . he seems so . kind :') god

13) honestly, i think he's about the same! tone down the anxiety a bit, i think the glitch definitely brought that out because who on earth would program the bot thats supposed to care for children with uncontrollable anxiety ?!?

14) i think he definitely was more like .... calm. and i'd see him as very kindhearted and soft ... a contrast to his glitch affected form. but i think he'd still have a little edge to him, since he's the 'security program', for lack of a better term, side of the dca

15) personally i see them as two separate beings in one body . i dont think it like .... super matters though? theyre very different. i think even if theyre two sides of the same person they're extremely wildly different and essentially function as two different people.

16) CANON ECLIPSE 🗣️🗣️🗣️🚨🚨📢📢📢📢📢‼️‼️📢📢📢‼️‼️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🚨🚨‼️‼️🗣️🗣️‼️🚨🗣️📢📢📢🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨 HE IS SO PERFECT

17) (no answer atm tbh)

18) honestly .... not sure . help wanted 2 blew me outta the water because tbh i hadnt been keeping up w the teasers and such due to life stuff so when sun/moon appeared in it i was absolutely fucking FLOORED

19) i'd .. really hope so ....! im just. really not sure though. i dont have a very good grasp on my perception of my self/my own place in the world and how i could potentially get along with people. it's something ive struggled with my whole life, its just very difficult for me to try to imagine how i'd get along with someone. but. i do like to imagine, maybe i would. maybe i would get along with them if i met them irl, and i think that would be nice. :] it would make me so happy.

20) honestly i just . really love seeing the community and how everyone interacts and such !!! ive always felt like an outsider in communities, even this one, but something about still feeling like and outsider here isnt so bad. i still feel like im a part of something. :] <3 also i adore seeing all the different interpretations of these guys ..... its so fun .... god i love seeing how differently people can interpret characters

alright dca fandom, here's some questions bc i'm curious. the funky jesters make our brains go brr, but why? treat it as an ask game or answer in the tags if you feel like it! :)

how did you get here?

why these characters in particular? what was the hook for you?

how long have you been here?

have you actually played fnaf sb?

if you make content, what's your favorite piece you've contributed?

what's your favorite sort of art or fic? what genre/flavor/style?

what's your favorite au?

do you have any ocs, or have any ocs you're fond of?

what do you think of the dca's canon appearance? Scary? Cute? Something else?

what keeps you in this fandom despite the very small amount of canon content the dca had?

be honest: if you had to pick only one, sun or moon?

thoughts on eclipse?

thoughts on pre-glitch sun?

thoughts on pre-glitch moon?

do you interpret sun and moon as two sides of the same person, or truly two separate beings in one body? does it matter?

what's something in the fandom you'd like to see more of?

what's something in the fandom you'd like to see less of?

anything you're looking forward to?

do you think you'd actually get along with the dca if you met them irl?

free space! talk about whatever's on your mind!

[the-blind-geisha]

angel sb mc 🌌✂️🌟

Thanks for the ask! I'm still trying to put together thoughts for her story, so bare with me... xD;

What was the inspiration behind your oc? what was the first thing you decided about them?

So, Demona (I'll start calling her) is a weird one. I actually had ideas about an SB OC prior to ever feeling comfortable about writing/drawing the ideas for Overlord. However, I never felt like I could really put anything out there that would be interesting, so I just turned her into a blank insert.

Being I love the whole angelic, holy being either being corrupted or falling for something demonic and sinful, it was easy to decide her race when I saw angels were considered heteromorphic in Overlord.

I knew she was going to be originally with Ulbert, as I adore his design as much as I do Demiurge's, but I wanted her to kind of suffer the same I've always felt with long distance relationships. People just either falling out of love via frustration of not being able to be there with their lover day in and out, taking them away from the means of which to communicate, ect.

The first thing I ever decided about them was their character race. Everything else has yet to flow into a cohesive story I can possibly, maybe...probably put together down the line. xD; We'll see.

What is the “last straw” for them to cut someone out of their life? how easily do they let go of people?

Not easily... lol

I will say this: we don't know what happened where Ulbert is concerned, but in his final hours, it is obvious he left for reasons he couldn't say or control.

Some of those could have been he was too stressed and not mature enough to continue in a relationship with someone dying slowly from cancer on top of worrying when he'd next see her again outside the gaming world.

There is probably a part of Demona that believes he left because the love died, and he was too scared to tell her to her face. Regardless, she tricks herself into believing that's not the case and to keep holding onto his memory best she can until she can hear it from his own mouth.

The last straw would be any person hurting someone close to her. Not really them hurting her by any means. She can deal with far too much emotionally till any straw is broken.

What do they think about when they look at the night sky? is there someone they want to star gaze with?

How horrible her true world is. She loves her new body and the new world she's in, but hates the responsibilities that are coming with it.

But when she looks at the night sky, she's grateful that, in all her years, she was blessed with the sight of the stars just once.

She wishes she could with the guild again. Ulbert, especially.

However, since he's not there, she often asks the NPCs to just indulge her, I wager. Demiurge is the main one to do this for obvious reasons. lol

[spade-riddles]

Fabulous Submission:

I didn’t intend to write this (I had a thought about something and it ballooned into this post), but here’s my interpretation of the Cardigan and Willow music videos. It’s an optimistic and chronological look at Taylor’s entire story up till now, and what I think/hope could come next. It’s really long, sorry.

I think the Cardigan and Willow videos are symbolic of Taylor’s career and personal journey over the last 15 years. So in Cardigan, she starts at the beginning of her career where it’s just her and her music. She follows the gold bubbles (representing fame?) and finds herself in this beautiful utopia, symbolizing her early career– she was famous, but not like she is today. She was wildly successful and talented, but wasn’t facing as many of the downsides to fame (intense scrutiny, safety concerns, privacy, etc). I’d say this period was maybe 2006-2010, when her career was fresh and fun and she was overall pretty happy.

I think she got a little swept up in her fame after that. She lost herself in a lot of ways. Her PR was a mess, her real relationships seemed to implode, and I suspect her relationship with SB started to deteriorate toward the end of this period (2010-2013 or so). Her reputation was “boy crazy/man-eater/serial dater.” This is where she was trying to stay afloat in the water in the music video. But she managed to hold on. The journey changed her, but she was on solid ground again. So that’s Cardigan– it covers 2006 to fall of 2013. She’s not in a great place, but she’s planning to make some changes.

Willow picks up where we left off, only this time, Taylor is following a gold string. She’s officially on the path to meet her soulmate. She plans to move from LA to NYC and seemingly has a plan to change her public image.  See: “I’m perfectly fine, I live on my own. I’ve made up my mind, I’m better off being alone. We met a few weeks ago…” So Taylor’s plan at the end of 2013 was to stay single. This is the dark, lonely scene with the willow and reflection pond. Of course, we know what happens next. When she least expected it, the string led her to Karlie. They met and had an instant connection– “have I known you 20 seconds, or 20 years?” This is the scene with the children in a tent. 

Suddenly, she finds herself in a glass closet. There’s no way out. She can sing and see and interact with her lover, but they can’t be in a public relationship. This is 2014-2016, the Kaylor BFF years, where we saw them together as “friends” all the time. We know Taylor was in a pretty bad place in 2016– this isn’t really depicted in the video, but I think she needed some time out of the public eye for her own wellbeing. So she left the glass closeting behind and made her relationship private, to escape some of the constant scrutiny around her life.

This is the dancing witches part of the video. Taylor is in hiding. We don’t see her in public anymore. We don’t see her with her friends. We don’t see her with her alleged boyfriend. She makes it impossible for the public to tell who is still in her life. The cloaked witches (Taylor’s close circle) are working together to give her privacy. I think they represent the people who know Taylor’s real story– her friends, family, close business associates (including Toe), and Karlie.

This is where she first says, “Every bait and switch was a work of art.” Around 2:22-2:26 in the music video. Then she dances with the other cloaked witches. I think this is 2017, when the biggest bait and switch of them all showed up: Toe. Taylor hired him so she could keep her real relationship private. The public thinks she’s with the most boring witch on the planet, but whoops, she’s actually dating one of the other witches.

Then, Taylor leaves the witches and wanders off, following the gold string away from the coven. Her love story isn’t over because she hasn’t made it to the end of the gold string. As in, Taylor’s end game is not secrecy and hiding and being closeted. Anyway, we can’t tell which witch is Taylor’s lover, since they’re all cloaked and masked. By design. But when Taylor walks away from the circle, one of the witches takes off their mask, and it turns out her lover was there the whole time. Much like we think Karlie and Taylor have been together this whole time, but publicly, that’s not what we see. 

Anyway, Taylor is still following the string, but she’s distanced herself from her lover (at least publicly). Her lover looks like he’s afraid he’s going to lose her as she walks away. What does this mean for Kaylor, publicly and privately? Are they going to be reunited? Is it possible someone else will be at the other side of the gold string? Why did Taylor wander away? We don’t know at this point. I think the entire dancing witches/snowy forrest scene is 2017 to sometime in 2020.

Taylor ends up back in her cabin, where she finds the other end of the gold string. For a second she’s confused, because she thought the string was supposed to lead her to her soulmate… and she thinks she’s alone in the cabin. This is where we are now, in my opinion. It looks like all hope is lost, that Taylor and Karlie are never going to publicly reunite. That maybe they aren’t even together– maybe Karlie was just another girlfriend, and the gold string leads to someone different. 

But then? Taylor sees her lover. Somehow, some way, he ended up back in the cabin with her. It’s the same person she saw in the reflecting pond, and on the other side of the glass closet, and danced with in secret. The guy in the cabin is the soulmate, after all. Making me think that the girl in Taylor’s story has always been Karlie.

We don’t know how they ended up together again. We don’t see the lover leave the dancing witches. He seems to have arrived before Taylor. I guess she took the long way back to the cabin? “I take the long way home” from DBATC? At 3:22, Taylor sings, “Every bait and switch was a work of art” again as they walk toward each other. Maybe this bait and switch is how the gp thinks they’re feuding… but really, they reunited recently. (I think they’ve been together the entire time, but this is the public narrative– they were together on and off before 2016ish, then they ignored each other and dated other people, then they privately reunited recently.) 

Here’s what gives me the most hope, even when things look bleak (like now): After reuniting privately, they walk hand in hand out the door, into the golden daylight together. The question is, is this Taylor’s fantasy? Or is it foreshadowing? Does she just want to publicly reunite with Karlie, but can’t (or won’t)? Or are they going to ACTUALLY reunite publicly in the near future?

I don’t want to get anyone’s hopes up. I know we’re all feeling really cynical right now because we’ve been burned so many times. I’m choosing to be optimistic for a bit longer– I think they’re about to reunite publicly. It’s okay if you disagree. I get it. None of us know what they’re up to and I could definitely be wrong. But I think Taylor singing, “Every bait and switch WAS a work of art” in past tense is interesting. If they have no plans to change anything, why not sing, “Every bait and switch IS a work of art”? “Is” would indicate to me that the games are ongoing. “Was” indicates to me that they’re over or will be soon. Also, why remind us of Daylight, the song about not hiding who you are and who you love? The song that she almost used as an album title but decided it was too on-the-nose? Why remind us of Daylight and the Lover album for the first track/music video of Evermore, the album where she DID name the album after its last track?

Cardigan’s final verse ends with, “I knew you’d come back to me.” Will Karlie publicly come back to Taylor? Willow ends with, “I’m begging for you to take my hand, wreck my plans, that’s my man.” Which is exactly what happens in the video. Evermore ends with, “Floors of a cabin creaking under my step / This pain wouldn’t be for evermore.” Like the cabin floor in Willow? Is her pain almost over? Daylight ends with Taylor saying, “You gotta step into the daylight and let it go” and, “I wanna be defined by the things that I love.” Again, that’s how Willow ends. It’s also similar to the second ending of Evermore, It’s Time To Go– “So then you go/then you go/you just go.” To me, this all looks like they’re still planning a public reunion and that we’re almost there.

I don’t know what’s happening with the baby and the beards. I don’t know what the plan is, and I don’t know if I’m going to like it. But everything else is giving me reasons to stick around a bit longer. I don’t think we’ve made it to the last page of the story quite yet.

[robinchan-hananomi]

One Piece 1023

I have a lot of thoughts here about the new chapter. There is a lot of things to unpack here!

So first, things I loved! I absolutely loved Zoro and Sanji’s dynamic in this chapter. Yes, the two were bickering a bit but honestly it felt like their comments were more to reassure each other than anything. Zoro immediately noticed that something was wrong with Sanji and Sanji responded honestly, that his body has felt funny ever since using the raid suit a second time. Zoro probes to see just how deep the concern is, asking if Sanji is going to slow him down, and Sanji’s answer seems to reassure him enough that he almost jokes, teasing Sanji about his eyebrows. One the flip side Sanji knows better than almost anyone just what kind of shape Zoro is in right now. They both look out for each other and they tease each other during the start of this fight, but it is mostly them being more like ‘look asshole, I know you’re trying to see what the extent of the damage is but I swear I am fine enough to knock this son of a bitch out’.

And make no mistake, Zoro and Sanji are probably going to have a lot of physical issues after this chapter. Sanji mentions that his body is feeling weird. This could be anything from the raid suit being intentionally designed to hurt Sanji to his body just not being able to cope with the strain the new technology is putting on him. The mink doctor also just reminded Chopper that while Zoro is up now, he won’t be for long and that he doesn't even want to imagine what kind of shape Zoro is going to be at the end of the fight. No matter how Wano shakes out, Zoro and Sanji are going to be hurting and will require some serious rest and TLC.

After Sanji and Zoro face off against King and Queen, we also get a small moment for the opponents to communicate. On Queen and Sanji’s side, Queen talks about how Judge experimented on his children and questions the validity of Sanji’s claim of being completely human since he can light his body on fire. Sanji admits he’s probably just that dramatic. On the other side Zoro notes King’s unorthodox fighting and when King points out there is no need to follow technique and method in combat, Zoro agrees and reminds King there really isn’t anything preventing Zoro from ripping out King’s throat with his teeth.

Now Zoro and Sanji are only able to fight King and Queen in peace due to Hyogoro and Kawamatsu’s efforts. Kawamatsu prevented a Beast Pirate from taking a shot at Zoro and Hyogoro explains that anyone who tries to help either side at this point would just be in the four combatants way. While they watch the fight, they comment about Zoro.

The thing is, Zoro has been connected to the Shimotsuki Clan from the start. Zoro’s hometown is Shimotsuki Village. In the SBS corner, Oda explained that the village was founded about 55 years ago by Shimotsuki Kozaburo, the man who forged Wado Ichimonji and Enma. Kozaburo’s son Koshiro ran the Isshin Dojo, which used the Shimotsuki Clan crest as it’s symbol and Zoro had worn that crest his entire childhood. Koshiro’s daughter Kuina was Zoro’s best friend and rival. Then Zoro met and fought Shimotsuki Ryuma, whose family name was again confirmed in the SBS corner. More on Ryuma in a minute. Ever since Zoro has entered Wano, he has been even more connected to the Shimotsuki Clan. The Clan had two Daimyo’s that we know of, Ushimaru and Yasuie. Zoro has spent a lot of time in Ringo, Ushimaru’s territory, and even combated with Ushimaru’s retainer Onimaru a few times now for Ryuma’s sword Shusui. On the other side Zoro befriended Yasuie and his daughter Toko. While all the strawhats were seen to be fond of Toko and quite a few met Yasuie, Zoro spent the majority of time with him.

Now as for Ryuma. Ever since the Monsters oneshot was tied to the One Piece Manga, fans had noticed the similarities between Zoro and Ryuma. The two look very alike in appearance and they had many similar mannerisms. They also have the connection of sharing a sword, Shusui, and both decapitated a dragon in the air. And now, apparently, Ryuma had lost an eye in his adventures and was known as a one eyed swordsman...which I mean his zombie did have a scar on his face that would have gone over his right eye along with bandages covering his right eye so it’s not really a surprise.

The two citizens of Wano comment that Ushimaru is a direct descendant of Ryuma and note that Zoro has a similar appearance and style of fighting to Ushimaru and by extension Ryuma. Now if this is because Zoro is somehow part of the Shimotsuki Clan (which I actually kind of hope not), or if it is just a coincidence about appearance and the other similarities are because Zoro trained at a dojo from the Shimotsuki Clan is still up in the air. Either way, I really do like the idea of developing Zoro more and I have been waiting for someone, anyone, in the manga to finally notice just how much Zoro seems to be connected to this family.

Anyway, back to the chapter! While Zoro and Sanji keep two of the three calamities busy, we see there is a LOT of other things going on. I’m not going to go in order of the rest of the chapter because I want to organize my thoughts a little.

So first, which is actually the last thing to happen, is Momo is now 28 years old. He has Shinobu turn him into an adult because he can only do so much as an eight year old. It is a fantastic way to follow the panels of the battle that came before it, because we see the samurai are willing to die to bring about an age where Kaido’s reign has ended and Momo’s time can start. They believe that Momo will bring Oden’s will and bring Wano to a wonderful future, they believe it so much that they are willing to die for it. Momo answers that belief by giving up twenty years of his life. Understand while twenty years have passed for everyone else, it hasn’t for Momo. Momo just had Shinobu mature his body by twenty years in order to get stronger, bigger, and be able to take a stand against Kaido. There is going to be a lot of issues in the future with having an eight year old in a twenty eight year old man’s body, but just like Zoro and quite possibly Sanji’s physical health; this is a bridge to cross when we get to it. After all everyone has to survive the battle and win before they can worry about what is next. So now as a much bigger and stronger dragon, Momo and Luffy can go face Kaido together.

On a side note with everyone talking about being ghosts and all, it’s kinda fitting that it is implied that Momo looks like Oden. Now we really will have people think they’re seeing ghosts.

We also have Inu and Neko fighting Jack and Big Mom’s son. These fights are not just about defeating Kaido either. There is an element of revenge to them both. As Inu sends Jack through a wall, he expresses recalls all the pain Jack brought to the people of Zou. Just like Neko talks about Pedro while fighting. And yet the two talk about how everything they lost, all that they suffered through, was all part of the road to get there, now, to bring Kaido and his Beast Pirates to an end. And the two are using their badass Sulong Form.

The last big note for this chapter is Marco’s memory of his discussion with Whitebeard. It is implied that King’s race are the Lunarian, and that King is the last one. They lived up on the Red Line in a long ago past. Marco recalls Whitebeard talking about how it was ‘God’s Land’ which is honestly giving me super Skypeia vibes. What exactly is this God’s Land?

Because we hadn’t talked too much of the Red Line, I for whatever reason, always imagined other people living up there. We knew the Celestial Dragons lived on the Red Line, but because it is like a long continent of linked together islands I just naturally assumed other races and beings lived up there. That doesn't appear to be the case. Which to be fair I am a fool for even thinking that because now that it’s put that way I realize a group so pompous and self important as the Celestial Dragons would never allow anyone so lowly as normal people to live so high in the world as they do. So they enjoy their life in the clouds while driving any peoples and race either off the Red Line or to extinction.

Marco brings up the old conversation to Izo, after the latter saves him for drifting off in a battle, and Izo says Marco sounds like Whitebeard when he was drunk. Whitebeard was part of the Rocks Pirates, the Pirate crew that shook the world to it’s core almost a whole generation before Roger even appeared. Whitebeard has seen some real shit. I wonder just what all Whitebeard knew about the world, and I wonder just how much he tried to impart on his children only for them to think he was drunkenly rambling?

Anyway, it was a fantastic chapter and I am so freaking excited to see where we go next!!!

[franeridart]

Anon said: Hey!! I wanna ask, how do you feel about the ship Rap//Gum (rappa and fatgum) and would you consider drawing or talking about them? They’re such a rare pair and I love their dynamic so much!

I don’t mind it, but I can’t say I’m invested enough to ever make something with it ngl T-T sorry!

Anon said: Heya! I was just looking through your art and I absolutely adore it! I was wondering, have you ever drawn Toga before?

Thank you!! And I haven’t, and probably won’t in the future either!

Anon said: I love your art! Keep going! Also, i love very much your Bokuroo art!! You're the best!

Thank you!!!!!!!!!!!! You keep going too, anon!!!!!

Anon said: MY STICKERS CAME!! I really wish Redbubble gave artists more for the stuff they sell there, because I love buying your stuff, when I can, but it feels like I'm ripping you off, because you get so little for everything. But, I love the stickers I got! I finally got Octopus Team, and Tamaki, which I've been wanting for AGES.i have no clue where I'll stick them, so I'll probably pin then to my wall, until I figure something out lol Stay sweet. ✌💜

AHHHHHHHH I’m so glad you like them!!!!!!!! And thank you so so much for the feeling and concern, but considering how they make them and ship them I feel like the amount I get isn’t too bad! I could technically earn more from them, but that’d raise the price more than I’d be comfortable with..........haha

Anon said: I will say this absolutely with no hesitation, I love your art style so much.

GOSH thank you so much!!!

Anon said: I'm absolutely in love with your art, it's so pretty, especially the way you draw Kirishima!

Thank you!!!!! He’s a lot of fun to draw so I’m glad you like him!!!! <3

Anon said: Your most resent piece (the blood cape Kiri) is MMMMM SO DELICIOUS!!! That boy can WORK IT!! Also,,,,,, I’m probably the only one that saw this, but the design in the blood cape looks like two abstract Iidas screaming at each other....... sorry I’m weird and that’s the second thing I noticed..... and sorry cuz this isn’t really an ask but YOU NEED TO KNOW HOW GOOOODDD THAT PIECE IS!!!! (It’s perrrrrrrfecccttt)

I!!!!!!!!!! can’t say I see it sorry!!!!!! But I’m super happy to hear you liked it, thank you so much!!!!!! <3

Anon said: Hiya!!! I really love ur art and the way you draw characters, so I wanted to ask you a question. :00 do you break down bodies into basic shapes when you draw?? If so, what're some general shapes you use for the torso??

To be fair it’s sort of random and based on the character I have to draw/the pose/ what they’re wearing haha...........don’t be like me this is why my anatomy is often questionable - if I had to give you a model tho, do you know those wooden models for artists? the very basic ones you can get for cheap anywhere, I mostly break up my bodies following the way it’s broken down on those lil dudes!

Anon said: Hnnnhhhgggg Garo is a sexy man and me.exe has stopped working

tbh that’s!!!! a big!!!!!!!!!! Mood!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I love my kaiju boy

Anon said: I really dislike BNHA, I think it's boring. Your art however? It's wonderful. I love your comics because they're so funny and sweet, they always make me smile when I see them. Your lineart is also really curved and soft looking, like it's made out of friendship. Thank you for sharing your art, it makes me and others so happy!

Glad I can make you enjoy something you usually don’t like, anon! <3 thank you!!

Anon said: I sooo wish manga Bakugo was like yours ç_ç By which I do not mean that yours is out of character, just that you depict his more human side and draw BEAUTIFUL scenes of him interacting with others as his peers rather than them being just props for him... and, well, your KiriBaku slays me and I love you for all of it

To be fair I like manga Bakugou better than my own haha I find him deeper, but that’s to be expected from one of my favorite characters after all! I’m glad you like mine that much, tho! Thank you!

Anon said: In one of your comics you reference Sharkboy and Lavagirl, right? Did you see the film in the theaters? You might be the only other Italian I know who has XD

I didn’t !!!!! sadly it took me reaching my twenties before I started regularly going to the movies and I was a kid when sb&lg came out ;;;;;; *sad violin music*

Anon said: BEAUTIFUL PERSON AWARD! Once you are given this award, you're supposed to paste it in the ask of 8 people who deserve it. If you break the chain nothing will happen, but it's sweet to know someone thinks you’re beautiful inside and out! 💞

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!!!!! <3<3

Anon said: Is there any ships that make you uncomfortable or you just don’t agree with?

Oh there’s a lot, I can be extremely peculiar with what I ship and what I don’t! I try to keep my mind and my dash/tl as empty of those ships as I can tho uwu *whispers* self-care

[gizkasparadise]

Kdrama review: Vagabond

Master Kdrama rec list.

Series: vagabond Episodes: 16 (14 of 16 aired so far) Genres: Intrigue, action/adventure, SADNESS, drama/tragedy, J U S T I C E, thriller, romance Spoilers in the Review: first episode/basic premise If You Like, You’ll Like: the guardians/lookout!, Taking The Law Into Your Own Hands, four brothers, gu family book, just between lovers/rain or shine, I Lived Bitch, lee seung gi playing yet another wannabe action star that has to run all the time, lee seung gi playing yet another character in love with suzy bae, wholesome high fives, having to run really fast as the bullets go put put ting ting ting behind you, PARKOUR 

Rank: 10/10

“we didn’t die! we didn’t fucking die! high five!!”

-

ok let’s get this out of the way:

do i understand any of the political plot? i do not. is it easy for me to keep track of various Machinations? no i have no idea what’s happening 9 times out of 10. could most of this be solved by singular phone calls? probably. why the hell is a vagabond?  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[puts on aviators]

i don’t give a fuck about all that

premise [SPOILERS for first ep, cw child death]

cha dal gun is a stuntman and martial artist who is raising his nephew after the death of his brother. he has such a signature look in the flashbacks:

a look

he’s not the best in terms of success, but he loves his nephew a lot and does what he can. he teaches his nephew martial arts, and his nephew makes a Super Elite Child Tae Kwon Do Team that pays for him to attend a Diplomatic Tae Kwon Do match in morocco. idk why diplomacy is resting on children’s small fighting shoulders, but okay. 

dal gun’s entire life spirals when his nephew’s plane to morocco unexpectedly crashes, killing everyone on board. Evidence emerges that makes him suspect a cover up, which eventually involves...

go hae ri, a rookie intelligence agent who is not so great at her job. the majority of her coworkers dont expect much from her because they’re awful. hae ri wants to continue her steady government position without obstacles but that doesn’t work when dal gun decides to

P U N C H

his way to 

J U S T I C E

-

main characters

cha dal gun

former stuntman trying to get by turned vigilante roof hopper. he will make you cry. following the death of his nephew, he’ll do Whatever It Takes to uncover the political conspiracy and government cover up surrounding the mysterious plane crash. for justice.

lowkey trying out to be an assassin’s creed player character. does push-ups upside down and shirtless because sbs producers know what they’re about. doesn’t smile much but when he does the lighting on the show increases 17%. he lived, bitch

go hae ri

rookie agent who doesn’t do combat missions. she spends a couple eps Avoiding the Call, but once she gets going she cannot and will not be stopped. brains to dal gun’s brawn. the daughter of a heroic marine who died saving lives, she wants to do the right thing for justice

her hair is so excellent because it’s full of secrets. over sharer. does not know when to recognize that someone has a crush on her. doesn’t think enough of herself. very concerned about people’s dal gun well-being. has the code name elsa? like from frozen?? why???

ki tae woong

a senior at the national intelligence service and you know he’s By the Book because he’s like 1 of 2 people that habitually wears a tie to work. but he also has the Is He A Second Lead? Hair Part so that lets you know he’s actually soft at heart. capable and super cool under pressure, he also, you guessed it, has a sense for justice. 

the blue to dal gun’s red. will do what’s right and if you don’t do what’s right he will scold you for it or be Grimly Disapproving. has the vibe of an intelligence agent who actually submits the paperwork on time in triplicate

some support characters selected by how much they are my favorites

park gwang deok

this man will make you cry. because justice.

gong hwa sook

hae ri’s bff who also works at the national intelligence service. im sure they said what her actual job is at one point, but she’s basically the one who squints at surveillance footage and Finds The Hidden Clue after Enlarging The Image. ride or die, will try to protect you from shame (for justice)

lee jessica / jessica lee

im sure you immediately know who this woman is based on the all-white pantsuit. jessica works for a Company of War that is seeking to get a government contract for providing fighter planes. mmwhatchasay. screams into cellphones a lot while never putting her arms into the sleeves of her designer jackets. has no sense for justice!!

lily

an assassin/mercenary who (gasp) also has a low (low) key sense of justice. is hired by jessica for Reasons. i love her so much. i need more lily in the remaining episodes.

Drawbacks.

does it always make sense? to be honest i could not even tell you a yes or no here

there are many interchangeable evil men in suits

people complain about suzy bae (hae ri)’s acting but honestly i enjoy it so w/e

Reasons to Watch.

THE GRIEVING FAMILY MEMBERS OF THE VICTIMS OF THE PLANE CRASH. one thing vagabond does really well is remember that this isn’t just dal gun’s loss. several family members have important roles in the activism for justice and lmao they make me cry. i cry so much at this show. it’s very human and reminds me of how trauma is addressed in just between lovers/rain or shine

action scenes!!!! it’s all off the fucking chain. like. the production value is so high for this show you can almost see SBS execs figuring out how many subway sandwich scenes need to go into the next drama they write

the mains!!! all three are so great and good and excellent. dal gun and hae ri have some awesome character development throughout -- hae ri especially

the romance between dal gun and hae ri is incredibly sweet and fluffy despite the intense situations they’re in

dal gun is Very Aware that hae ri is Attractive and does a lot of awkward throat clearing while hae ri is just like DID YOU EAT TODAY

Final Thoughts.

power moves! things that make me cry! slow motion action sequences for the aesthetic! battle/power couple! and of course

J U S T I C E

[searchingwardrobes]

Happy birthday, @welllpthisishappening ! For your special day (I hear it is a big birthday?), I wanted to incorporate things you love into a fic. That includes baseball, and if my ignorant self made any errors, I apologize! Anyway, I hope you enjoy discovering some of your favorite things in this fic. I admire you tremendously as a talented writer and overall wonderful person, and I wish you the very best of birthdays!

Summary: Emma Swan doesn’t do friends with benefits - too many feelings involved. But best friends with a guy she slept with once? Well, that’s completely different. So they get jealous every now and then, that’s not feelings - right? Based on the song by the Gin Blossoms.

Rated T for adult situations and language

Words: Almost 6,000

Also on Ao3 and part of my Fandom Birthday Playlist

Tagging the usuals:@snowbellewells @jennjenn615 @kday426 @let-it-raines @teamhook@kmomof4 @bethacaciakay @profdanglaisstuff @resident-of-storybrooke @thislassishooked @tiganasummertree@whimsicallyenchantedrose @snidgetsafan @delirious-latenight-laughs @winterbaby89 @distant-rose@shireness-says @xhookswenchx @optomisticgirl @spartanguard @branlovestowrite

And you know it might not be that bad, you were the best I ever had. If I hadn’t blown the whole thing years ago, I might not be alone.

What’s the cliche? Something about not wasting time looking in the rearview mirror because that’s not where your headed? Of course, Emma Swan has always been difficult, so to speak, with life maxims. It isn’t that she’s intentionally trying to be cynical, it’s just . . . Is she the only one who ever thinks through these cute sayings? Because, yeah, out the front windshield is your destination, but who doesn’t use their rearview mirrors when driving? What if someone with road rage is kissing your bumper? And don’t people pass slow drivers? Kind of need your rearview mirrors for that.

Of course, there’s probably some saying about not speeding through life or staying in your lane . . . ok, now she’s probably muddling the driving metaphors.

The point is, Emma finds herself looking in her proverbial rearview mirror a lot. They say “what ifs” are pointless, but she’s got plenty of them anyway. Most are painful. What if my parents had kept me? What if Neal and I really had gotten to Tallahassee? What if I had held him, just for a minute?

But others make her grateful. What if Ruth hadn’t taken in an angry, pregnant teen? What if David hadn’t been all “instant big brother”? What if Ruby hadn’t been assigned the office right next to mine?

The one that plagues her the most, however, is What if I had never slept with Killian Jones? Not that the night itself wasn’t great - it was. Not that Killian didn’t graciously ignore the constant elephant in the room - he did. Not that they weren’t best friends despite it all - they were.

She just wondered sometimes . . . she wasn’t even sure, she just . . . wondered. Her sexual partners all fit into three categories: Neal (relationship), one night stands, and Killian, who was . . . what exactly? Her best friend she slept with that one time? The one night stand who became her best friend? Her best friend who just so happened to be a little drunk and sort of lonely at the exact same time she was a little drunk and sort of lonely?

None of their (mutual) friends knew about what happened between the maid of honor and the best man at David and Mary Margaret’s wedding. After all, she and Killian had never met until that weekend. It should have been a perfect one night stand situation - he lived in Seattle. As in, on the complete opposite side of the country. Then his college best friend had to go and get him a job at Storybook Biz.

Thanks a lot, David.

And just like that, her one night stand was across the hall every day at work. It should have been awkward.

Only it wasn’t. And now Emma’s constantly pondering that damn rearview mirror . . .

Tell me do you think it’d be alright if I could just crash here tonight? You see I’m in no shape for driving, and anyway, I’ve got no place to go.

Killian knocking at Emma’s door at a quarter to midnight wasn’t necessarily an oddity. But Killian knocking on her door at a quarter to midnight when he was supposed to be on a date? That wasn’t exactly common.

“Are you drunk?”

He stumbled past her, running his fingers through his already disheveled hair. “Only slightly.”

“I take it the date didn’t go well,” she muttered as she closed the door.

Killian kicked off his shoes and collapsed onto her couch without preamble. “I suppose it depends upon your point of view.” He flung his arm over his face wearily. Emma sat at the opposite end of the couch and propped his feet in her lap.

“Okay, Obi-Wan, enlighten me.”

His voice was muffled beneath his forearm. “Before the appetizers even arrived I knew everything I never wanted to know about Aladdin.”

“Which one, the cartoon or the new one with Will Smith?”

Killian chuckled as he caught her eye, his arm sliding up to rest on his forehead. “Jasmine’s ex.”

Emma’s eyebrows flew to her hairline. “Your date’s name was Jasmine, and her ex is Aladdin? Seriously?”

“I couldn’t make this up if I tried, love. Anyway, I suppose the evening ended well for them since I basically assisted in getting them back together. She raced out of the restaurant to meet him, leaving me with a platter of wontons.”

“Are you trying to date or run some sort of relationship rehab?” Emma asked as she propped a throw pillow on his feet and hugged it to her chest.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Emma shrugged. “This was your first date since Ariel, and you were only helping her make Eric jealous.”

“Which also worked, I’d like to point out.” He grabbed a fistful of his hair as a light seemed to dawn in his eyes. “You know, Swan, you may be onto a new career for me.”

Emma rolled her eyes and then smacked him in the stomach with the pillow. “Shut up. You better not abandon me to Scarlett. There would be bloodshed in the office.”

Killian grabbed the pillow, holding it just out of her reach as she tried to snatch it back. “Are you trying to say that I’m the most brilliant cover designer at SB?”

“No,” Emma huffed, lunging across Killian’s torso to finally get hold of the pillow, “I’m saying you’re much less of a dick than Scarlett.”

Though Killian was the best cover designer they had on staff, and everyone knew it. Including Killian.

“I’d also reconsider your dating choices,” Emma continued, shifting so she was wedged between him and the couch.

“Swan,” Killian groaned, “not this again. You haven’t liked anyone I’ve dated.”

“That’s not true!”

“You didn’t like Ursula.”

“She was too old for you.”

“Belle.”

“She was actually into Scarlett the whole time, and really, how many women can you say that about?”

“Zelena.”

“You didn’t like Zelena! You found an excuse to bail before the menus arrived.”

“Okay, she was scary. But what about Tink? You despised Tink.”

“Well of course. She calls herself Tink for God’s sake.”

He arched one brow at her, then tickled her feet until she kicked him lightly in the ribs. “Okay, I’ll concede, Tink was a little on the eccentric side.”

“You know, I see a pattern here. Jasmine, Ariel, Belle. Should I start calling you Prince Charming?”

Killian gave her his trademark grin, the one that was lopsided and slightly cocky. “I dated a woman named Tink, love, maybe you should call me Captain Hook.”

Emma barked a laugh and dug her toes into his collar bone. “With a perm and a waxed moustache?”

“I could pull it off.”

He probably could, the bastard. Emma swung her feet around and stood up with a grunt.

“I should probably get you some water and an aspirin.”

Killian took the throw pillow she’d discarded and placed it behind his head. “I didn’t have all that much to drink, honestly. Just thought I’d play it safe and crash here? The restaurant was only a block away.”

He gave her his best puppy dog face, and Emma rolled her eyes. “Fine.”

“And I didn’t have anything else to eat after the wontons.”

“I’ll make you a grilled cheese.” She was grumbling as she headed for the kitchen, but in truth she was glad he’d stopped by.

She was always glad when he stopped by. It had nothing to do with his bad date with Jasmine. Nothing at all.

“Only thing is,” Killian sighed as she pulled the frying pan out of her kitchen cabinet, “now I don’t have a date to the charity ball.”

“Oh,” Emma muttered as she got out the bread and cheese. She turned to get the plates, and smiled to see Killian already there, handing them to her. They moved about the kitchen with practiced ease until the sandwiches were ready. Killian grabbed some sodas from the fridge, and they headed back to the sofa.

“What about you, Swan?”

“What about me?” Emma asked, licking a drop of cheese off her finger.

Killian’s eyes darted to her lips, then he gave his head a slight shake. “Um, about the charity event next weekend.”

Several firms in the publishing industry were holding the event. The kickoff was the ball on Friday night, but there was also a charity baseball tournament on Saturday, and a carnival on Sunday. All of it was to raise money for a childhood literacy foundation. It was a pretty big deal for Storybook Biz to be involved. They were the only company participating that provided services to self-publishers, and exclusively in children’s and YA lit at that. It could put their relatively small company in the limelight, something that Regina was reminding them of on a constant basis. Complete participation was required.

“Well, believe it or not, Walsh agreed to go.”

Emma could see Killian’s adam’s apple as he swallowed, his eyes widening slightly.

“A third date, huh?”

Emma set her plate down with a thud on the coffee table. “What’s that tone?”

“There was no tone.”

“Yes there was.”

Killian sighed. “I just . . . think you could do better.”

You mean like you? The words were on the tip of her tongue before she swallowed them back. No need to shine a spotlight on that damn elephant.

“He’s a nice guy!”

“He looks like a monkey.”

“He does not. That’s ridiculous.” Emma shoved her sandwich in her mouth and chewed furiously. Walsh did have sort of a weird smile that when you thought about it . . . She suddenly found her Charlie’s Angels thrift store plate absurdly fascinating. She cringed when Killian practically crowed with laughter.

“You see it too, admit it! It’s the ears -”

“Now that’s the pot calling the kettle black, wouldn’t you say?” Emma teased, reaching over to tug on Killian’s elf shaped ears. They were adorable, actually, but she wasn’t about to tell him that.

The ear tugging escalated into a tickling/wresting match that involved pillows, Emma’s set of Jonas Brothers coasters, and using her Charlie’s Angels plates as frisbees. By the time they ended up in a heap on the couch, talk of dates was forgotten as they decided to binge watch Parks & Rec.

She absolutely did not care who he was taking to the charity ball anyway.

The past is gone but something might be found to take its place . . . Hey, jealousy.

When Walsh rang her apartment, Emma had to lift the skirts of her massive ball gown just to walk to the door. She was going to grumble and complain to her friends about the theme of this ball - An Enchanted Fairy Tale Evening - but secretly, she sort of liked this whole formal wear cosplay thing.

Except for what this corset was doing to her spleen.

“Walsh, what the hell?”

The man was standing there in the hallway wearing a black tux. He even had a corsage in a little plastic box like he was taking her to the prom.

He looked her up and down incredulously in a way that no woman wants to be looked at by a man taking her to a ball. His look was equivalent to the way a baby boomer rolled their eyes at a Potterhead dressed up for Dragon Con.

“I didn’t think you were serious about the themed thing.”

“Yes I was serious! Now we’re going to look ridiculous!”

“We will look ridiculous?”

His laugh died under Emma’s withering scowl. She grabbed her clutch and practically slammed her door behind her. “Let’s go.”

He never even told her she looked nice.

************************************************************

“Swan. You look . . . “

Emma gave Killian a quirk of her brow and a teasing smile as she curtsied somewhat awkwardly. “I know.”

“I mean . . . “ Killian walked around her (quite a feat, actually, the skirt was massive) admiring her at every angle, “you cut quite the figure in that dress, love, and red has always been my favorite color on you.”

Emma glanced at a scowling Walsh as Killian bent to kiss her hand. Well, it served him right. He should have gushed over her long before they arrived. Killian’s eyes met hers, and he winked.

“Okay, that’s enough pawing my date,” Walsh grumbled, giving Killian a slight shove. He flashed the other man a tight yet friendly smile to temper his words, but Walsh was clearly marking his territory. Emma crossed her arms over her chest before Walsh could tuck her hand into the crook of his arm. His jealousy was far from cute.

“Did Emma not tell you there was a theme?”

Walsh tilted his chin. “I’m a little past playing dress up.”

Emma’s jaw dropped, but Killian just chuckled. “Well, mate, looks like you’re the only one.”

He slapped Walsh on the shoulder just a tad harder than necessary and gave Emma another wink as he rejoined his date for the night. It was just Anna, who was practically his sister since Elsa married Liam, and the only reason she came with Killian tonight was because Kristoff came down with the flu.

Not that Emma cared who his date was, of course. However, she couldn’t deny how incredibly handsome he looked in a long, brown brocade coat with gold buttons and blue leather breeches. The white linen shirt beneath had just enough buttons undone to give him a rakish look, and she remembered their conversation about Prince Charming and Captain Hook. The man even had a gold sword at his hip.

“Could you, uh, get me a drink?” Emma asked Walsh, her throat dry.

The minute he was gone, there was a voice at Emma’s ear.

“If you stare at Killian any harder, he’s gonna burst into flames.”

Emma jumped, her heart giving a little lurch. “Shit, Rubes, don’t sneak up on me like that!”

“Not that I blame you,” Ruby continued with a smirk, “he makes a great prince, doesn’t he?”

Emma shook her head, but couldn’t help smiling at her friend. Ruby’s dress was your standard Renaissance festival garb, but what made her stand out was the crimson cape she’d draped over it. She also carried a little basket in lieu of a clutch.

“Little Red Riding Hood?”

Ruby’s bright red lips quirked in a flirty grin. “It’s a fairy tale.”

“So who’s your big bad wolf?”

Ruby rolled her eyes. “I came with Victor.”

“Rubes!”

“I’m between relationships, and I knew he would say yes.”

Emma shook her head, but before she could warn her friend any further regarding her on again, off again ex, Walsh was at her side with a flute of champagne.

“Thanks,” she told him, taking a sip.

“Hey, Walsh,” Ruby said, “I heard you were playing in the game tomorrow.”

Emma almost choked on her champagne. “You are?”

“Well, yeah,” he said with a shrug, “I’ve done some CPA work for Macmillan, and they were short a man. I was going to tell you.”

“Macmillan?” David asked as he walked up with Mary Margaret on his arm. They were dressed as Snow White and Prince Charming.

Naturally.

“SB is playing Macmillan in the first game.”

“Oh, well, be prepared for my girl to cheer against you.”

Emma gritted her teeth as Walsh planted a wet kiss to her cheek.

“She’s no one’s girl.” Killian’s eyes were laser focused on her as he joined the group, his jaw tight. Emma couldn’t decide if it was sweet or embarrassing. Walsh rocked back on his heels, chuckling nervously.

“Right, right, woman. I meant woman.”

“Woman,” Killian bit out sarcastically, his gaze still on Emma, “I don’t think your date understood the full meaning of my criticism, love.”

Emma stepped out of Walsh’s half-embrace before his fingers could dig any further into her waist. She stepped between him and Killian in what she hoped was a casual move.

“Why don’t we dance?” She widened her eyes slightly, hoping Killian would pick up on her silently begging him not to make a scene.

“He doesn’t get the first dance, I do!” Walsh’s voice rose slightly, indignant, as he grasped her by the elbow.

Emma saw Killian’s eyes flash, and she bit back a groan.

“Don’t grab her like that, mate.”

Emma was probably the only one who noticed the way he bit out that final word, and she was probably the only one who knew that his steely calm was way more dangerous than raising his voice would have been. She smoothly yanked her arm out of Walsh’s grasp and laid her hand gently on Killian’s shoulder.

“I can handle this,” she whispered.

“Hey!” Walsh snapped, his voice rising another octave. He knocked Emma’s hand off Killian’s shoulder, and that was the proverbial last straw. How had she not seen what an epic jerk this guy was until three dates in? She turned, fully prepared to slap Walsh across the face for daring to touch her yet again like he owned her.

Killian, however, beat her to it.

Faster than anyone could process it, Killian’s fist had connected with Walsh’s jaw, and the latter stumbled backwards before losing his balance and hitting the floor.

“Killian! What the hell?” Emma shouted, more because she’d missed her opportunity to hit Walsh herself than concern for her date. Then she noticed the hush fall over the room and saw the gaze of most of the party goers directed at them. She turned towards Killian then, her face burning with humiliation.

He was no longer looking at her, though, instead towering over Walsh with both fists clenched.

“You’re insane!” Walsh shouted at him, rubbing at his jaw. “She said you were her best friend, but clearly you’re fucking her too.”

Killian surely would have kicked the shit out of Walsh then, based on the fire in his eyes, but Regina chose that moment to step in. With the same terrifying grace she wielded so well in the office, she grasped both Emma and Killian by the upper arm with surprising strength.

“If I may have a word,” she hissed as she pulled them towards the ballroom entrance. Once in the hallway, she shoved them into the coatroom, slamming the door behind her. She turned to them then, leaning her back against the door and crossing her arms over her chest. She was dressed in a skin tight red velvet dress with a long train that pooled around her feet. Her blood red lipstick and blood red nails only added to the overall effect.

“I see you decided to go with Evil Queen instead of princess,” Killian quipped, “perfect choice, your majesty.”

“Shut it, Jones,” she snapped. If looks could kill, Emma was pretty sure she and Killian would have dropped dead right then. “Do you have any idea the groveling I had to do to get our company invited to this event? The last thing we need is you two causing a scene. Now either go back out there and be professional, or - “ Regina paused and smirked at the two of them, “fuck already and put us all out of our misery.”

She left then, leaving Emma red-faced with her jaw on the floor. Her hands fisted in her taffeta skirt, and she refused to even look at Killian. When he spoke, the teasing tone in his voice only made her angry.

“Little does she know -”

“Don’t. Even. Say it.”

Emma leveled him with a murderous glare of her own before stomping over to the door of the coat room. She tripped over her skirt in the process, which sort of ruined the whole tone she was going for, but she stubbornly squared her shoulders and reached for the doorknob. She threw a few more words at him over her shoulder, once again avoiding eye contact.

“Don’t follow me. Wait ten minutes and give me time to get Walsh out of here before you two go swinging your dicks around again.”

As she yanked the door open, Killian replied softly behind her, “As you wish.”

Cause all I really want is to be with you, feeling like I matter too. If I hadn’t blown the whole thing years ago, I might be here with you.

The only bright side to leaving the ball early with Walsh was that she actually got a good night’s sleep and didn’t have to worry about a hangover the next day.

And dumping Walsh - that was a bright side too.

A good night’s sleep with no hangover was definitely a positive when sitting in the bleachers in the blazing hot sun on a Saturday afternoon. She really couldn’t believe she was required to be here. At least the concession stand had decent onion rings.

“Emma!” Mary Margaret called out as she navigated the bleachers with a container of chili cheese fries in her hands.

“MM, thank God! I was starting to think I was the only one at SB who wasn’t in the game.”

“Well, to be honest,” Mary Margaret admitted as she took a seat next to Emma, “I would prefer to be out there. David is being a bit too overprotective right now.”

“Overprotective? Why?”

Mary Margaret beamed, a twinkle in her eye as she subtly rested her hand on her abdomen. Emma gasped.

“Are you serious?”

“You mean do I seriously have a Nolan bun in the oven? Yes, yes I do.”

Emma hugged her friend. “I’m so happy for you! I can’t believe David let you tell me.”

MM shrugged. “I told him if he was going to be this ridiculou, he better let me tell you the real reason I’m not in the game.”

Emma rolled her eyes. “Sounds like David. You’re not even showing, what could happen?”

“Please don’t ask your brother that question. He’ll give you a dozen scenarios, each one more ridiculous than the last. When I imagined him trailing behind me on the diamond like I might break, I decided to humor him rather than be humiliated. Besides, this morning sickness clearly isn’t fond of the heat. No one wants to see me puke all over the dugout.”

“Yet you’re eating chili cheese fries.” Emma arched both brows as she glanced from the greasy food, to her sister-in-law, and back again.

“There’s no rhyme or reason to morning sickness, Emma. This was the only thing on the menu that didn’t make me want to hurl. Oh, and fyi, I’d keep those onion rings downwind.”

“Thanks for the warning,” Emma quipped, moving her favorite junk food to her other side.

Mary Margaret waved to her husband, and David waved back. “That man looks so good in a baseball jersey.”

“Ew, sister here.”

Mary Margaret laughed around a cheesy fry. “Okay then, how do you think Killian looks in a baseball jersey?”

“I’m mad at him, if you haven’t noticed.”

“That has no bearing on how he looks in the damn uniform, Emma.”

The inning had just ended, and the SB players were returning to the dugout. Killian’s eyes fell on Emma’s, and he gave her a tentative smile and a small wave. Emma, her eyes safely hidden behind a large pair of sunglasses, ignored him. His way too expressive face made it clear that she may as well have shouted obscenities at him. She sighed.

“Can you just admit the man is madly in love with you?” MM groaned.

Emma had never been so thankful for sunglasses in her life. “Would everyone just stop? We’re close. Best friends. That’s it.”

“Right.”

“And not friends with benefits, despite what Rubes says. I don’t do that.”

“Oh, I know it,” MM deadpanned, “but don’t think everyone in the office hasn’t noticed the yearning looks and doey eyes.”

“I don’t yearn,” Emma muttered before shoving an onion ring in her mouth.

“Maybe, but he does.” Emma chanced a glance at MM. She was regarding her with a tender, almost pitying look on her face. She laid a hand on Emma’s arm. “And I think you’re just better at hiding it.”

“I don’t see any evidence that Killian is . . . is . . . “

“In love with you? God, you can’t even spit out the word!” MM gave a wry chuckle. “And no evidence? Are you insane? Every time there’s donuts in the break room, he makes sure to deliver a bear claw to your desk. With a note, I might add.”

“They’re just inside jokes, not love letters.” Emma snorted through her nose, but it came out somewhat pathetic.

“And last Valentine’s day,” MM continued, undeterred, “how many bags of conversation hearts did he go through to pick out every single one that said best friend?”

Emma couldn’t help smiling at the memory. “Ok, but it’s not like he picked out the ones that said True Love or Soulmate or something.”

“God, you are grasping at straws. You have to admit that -”

The crack of the bat resounded through the ball field, and Emma and MM abandoned their snacks and surged to their feet as Killian tossed the bat aside and ran towards first. They shouted and cheered as the MacMillan outfield ran to retrieve the ball and Killian rounded second.

“Oh no,” Emma whispered.

There, crowding third base, was Walsh.

“Is he allowed to do that?” MM asked.

Emma’s stomach protested all those onion rings as she saw the determined look on Killian’s face and Walsh’s stubborn stance. This was clearly not about baseball, but personal. A sickening feeling washed over her as Walsh leaned one shoulder forward just as Killian reached the base. Walsh drove his entire body into Killian, sending him sprawling to the dirt.

“What does he think this is, football?” MM screeched.

The blood drained from Emma’s face when Killian didn’t get up. She shoved her way down the bleachers, running full tilt out onto the field. The umpire was already heading that way, and play had ceased.

“What the hell, Walsh!” she screamed as she skid to her knees at Killian’s side. “This isn’t the fucking World Series!”

Part of her wanted to fling herself at the man and beat the crap out of him, but her desire to know that Killian was okay won out. She leaned over him, just as his eyes blinked open, squinting at the bright sun overhead.

“Hey, beautiful!” he said to her, his voice slurred, his eyes unfocused.

“Call 911!” Emma yelled at the players gathered around.

“Come on, Emma,” Will retorted, “it’s just a concussion.”

“Don’t argue with me, Scarlett, I swear to God! Just make the damn call!”

Killian started murmuring again, groping with his hand as if trying to find her. “I knew you cared - I mean, really cared. You love me, don’t you?”

Emma took his hand to still it’s frantic movements and held it tight. “Of course I do.”

“No,” he slurred, “I mean looooove.”

“911!” Emma barked, at who she didn’t care. Killian’s eyes were rolling back in his head, and why the hell did nobody but her care?

“Ems,” David said gently, “seriously, we’ll take him to the ER. No need for an ambulance.”

He and Robin each took Killian by the arm and helped him to his feet. Killian swayed and his head lolled. His eyes started to close, and Robin slapped his cheek a few times.

“Stay with me, mate.”

“Robin!” Killian crowed. “Did you know I love Emma?”

“Yes, Kil, I heard that.”

Emma glared at Ruby when she let out a snort. “Don’t even, Rubes!”

“What? I didn’t say a thing!”

Emma followed closely behind the men as they half walked, half dragged Killian across the baseball diamond and out to the parking lot. Mary Margaret was there, hovering around Killian like a mother bird.

“Watch his head!” she warned as they slid him into the back seat of her and David’s car. “Emma, stay back here with him.”

And just like that, Emma was in the back seat with Killian’s head in her lap. She kept having to slap his cheek to keep him awake. Without conscious thought, her fingers carded through his hair. Every time she patted his cheek, he mumbled more sappy, romantic nonsense. Thankfully, it was all G rated with no reference to the weekend they met. No need to tempt David to skip the hospital altogether.

“You know,” MM said with exaggerated thoughtfulness, “they say in moments like this, a person’s inhibitions are gone, enabling them to speak their truth.”

“Not the time, MM,” Emma told her through clenched teeth.

Mary Margaret just gave her a self-satisfied grin.

And you can trust me not to think, and not to sleep around. If you don’t expect too much from me, you might not be let down.

Emma sat in one of the uncomfortable hospital chairs made of molded plastic, shifting in a vain attempt to get comfortable. She kept clasping and unclasping her hands nervously. The look on Liam Jones’s face before going back to see his brother was worse than any look David had ever leveled at the men she had dated. It clearly said this is all your fault, Emma.

“Ignore Liam,” Elsa told her, putting a slender hand to her shoulder. “His overprotectiveness borders on insanity. How in the world could a concussion from a charity baseball game be your fault?”

Emma deflated, resting her head on Elsa’s shoulder. “No, in this case he’s right. It is my fault. If I had seen what a douchebag Walsh was earlier, Killian would have never punched him at the ball, and then Walsh would have never sent him crashing to the dirt.”

“Or,” Elsa amended, “you could have stopped pretending to be clueless and just accepted your feelings for Killian. Then you’d both quit making stupid decisions.”

Emma lifted her head from Elsa’s shoulder. “What is this? Can’t everyone cut me some slack?”

“We just all want you to be happy.”

“Who says dating Killian will make me happy? It could all blow up in our faces and then we don’t even have a friendship anymore.”

“Emma,” Elsa said gently, tucking a strand of hair behind her friend’s ear, “the deepest kind of love starts with friendship.”

Emma covered her face with both hands. Elsa didn’t know how it all started - no one did. When Killian had shown up at Storybook Biz with a cardboard box resting at his hip, Emma had played it cool. He probably thought she hated the night they’d spent together, or at the very least assumed it meant nothing to her. Now they were firmly stuck in the friend zone and she had no idea what to do about it.

Or maybe this concussion was a blessing in disguise? She groaned. For one, that was incredibly selfish of her, and for another, he most likely remembered nothing that he’d said to her.

“He’s asking for you.”

Emma rose quickly at the sound of Liam’s voice, then swayed at her sudden dizziness. She blinked to clear the spots in her vision. She suddenly realized she’d had no water since leaving the baseball field. Great, she was dehydrated and emotionally drained. Perfect.

“Take this and drink all of it,” Elsa commanded, pressing a water bottle into her hand. No wonder Elsa and MM had been blessed with husbands and babies. Taking care of people was embedded in their DNA.

Emma took a swig of the water as she headed down the hallway to Killian’s room. They had done an MRI already, confirming that it was a concussion, and a pretty severe one at that. He had been admitted to a room to stay overnight for observation. It made Emma sway again just thinking about it, and she took another sip of water to steady herself.

When she entered the room, Killian turned to her with a smile on his face. He looked odd in the hospital gown, his normal bravado toned down by the washed out, institutional garment. There was an IV in his hand, and sensors taped to his chest, and machines beeped. All of it combined to make tears spring to Emma’s eyes.

“Hey,” he told her, reaching out to take her hand as she neared the bed, “I’m fine.”

“No you’re not,” she choked out.

“Ok,” he conceded, “but I will be.”

She couldn’t speak, so she just squeezed his hand. He reached up with his free hand and scratched behind his ear.

“So about the stuff I said when I was . . . out of it.”

“Oh, don’t worry about that,” Emma assured him quickly, waving her hand as if swatting away so many flies. “You didn’t know what you were saying.”

Killian frowned as if her words hurt him. “Everything since I hit the ground is patchy, Emma, I’ll admit, but there’s one thing I do know. I was blabbering on about my feelings for you, all of which I definitely meant.”

Emma felt a sudden urge to run, but Killian tightened his grip on her hand, threading his fingers with hers. He held her hand a lot, but she gazed at their interlaced fingers as if she’d never seen them that way before.

“Now that those words are out, Emma, I refuse to take them back. I know that night at the wedding didn’t mean to you what it did to me, and I’m well aware that you deserve far better than the likes of me, but -”

“Excuse me?”

Killian blinked rapidly, his shock at her harsh tone clearly evident on his face. “Um . . . what?”

She pulled her hand away and crossed her arms over her chest. “Did you seriously just say that I deserve better than you?”

Killian’s gaze darted to the open door, as if hoping Liam would arrive and rescue him. “Uh . . . yes?”

“And did you also just say that the night we spent together meant nothing to me?”

Killian swallowed nervously, and Emma bit the inside of her cheek to keep the scowl on her face.

“I . . . yes, I said that, too.”

Emma propped her hands on her hips and tilted her chin. “I’ll have you know, Killian Jones, that I’ve replayed that night in my mind on numerous occasions.”

A half-smile quirked his lips. “Is that so?”

“Yes.”

He licked his bottom lip and arched one brow. “And why, may I ask, do you replay it so often?”

Emma gave him a half-smile of her own. “Because it was pretty damn good.”

Both of Killian’s brows rose. “Pretty good? Because I have to say, Emma Swan, that you’re the best I’ve ever had.”

Emma couldn’t stop the huge grin that split her face at that, and despite the IV and the narrow bed and all the beeping machinery, she launched herself at him. He caught her, successfully maneuvering all of the cords out of her way. She slanted her mouth over his, awkward and slightly sloppy. They both laughed, and Emma dug her fingers into his shoulders, resisting the urge to grab the back of his head. Damn concussion. She really loved his hair.

“You’re the best I’ve ever had, too,” Emma whispered against his collar bone. The hospital gown didn’t fit very well, and her lips met warm skin.

Killian reached up and buried his fingers in her hair. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

And when she said it, she didn’t hide against his chest or look away. She sat up, grasped his face with both hands and held his gaze. She let the words sink in, and then she pressed her lips to his again.

The past is gone, but something might be found to take its place.

[liunaticfringe]

Lucy Liu is chuckling quietly on the other end of the phone line as she muses over the question inspired by the title of her new series, Why Women Kill.

"I don't think every woman could be pissed off enough to actually become a killer," the 51-year-old actor says, referring to the SBS series about three women living in different decades who must each decide how to deal with infidelity. "But does it make you think about the times where you've been really angry at someone – like, what it would take? Maybe."

She adds with another giggle, "Obviously I've never gone to that extent, but I've had many opportunities in my career to carry out death sentences. So I guess you could say, for good or bad, I've been able to get it out of my system somewhat!"

Lucy – who recently wrapped a seven-season stint as Dr Joan Watson to Jonny Lee Miller's Sherlock Holmes in the modern-day TV revamp Elementary (2012-19) – is talking to Sunday Life from her New York City apartment, where she's been busy trying to keep her four-year-old son Rockwell amused during the city-wide COVID-19 stay-at-home order.

"New York is usually vibrant, because it's a walking city, but now everyone is wearing masks and avoiding each other," she laments. "It's difficult because Rockwell likes to be moving around all the time. It's just impossible to have him not put things in his mouth when I turn my back!"

Why Women Kill is creator Marc Cherry's latest series to showcase a female ensemble. He started out in 1990 as a writer and producer on the The Golden Girls and its short-lived spin-off, The Golden Palace. He also co-created the female-driven sitcom, The 5 Mrs Buchanans, went on to create the Golden Globe-winning series Desperate Housewives, and followed that up with Devious Maid.

Why Women Kill is a 10-part series detailing the lives of three women living in the same California home over three eras: Beth Ann (Ginnifer Goodwin), a '60s housewife; Simone (Lucy Liu), an '80s socialite; and Taylor (Kirby Howell-Baptiste), a present-day lawyer. There's bisexuality, open marriage, adultery, a closeted spouse, an overdose, a front-yard brawl and a choking incident involving meatloaf – and that's just the first episode!

Ultimately, the show examines how the roles of women may have changed through the decades, but their reaction to betrayal remains the same.

The actor had just wrapped Elementary when Cherry called to pitch her the character. "He said he really had Simone in mind for me, then he walked me through the actual storyline," she recalls. "It definitely changed a little bit from what we talked about at the start, but during the writing we got to know each other more and I felt like he had a great way of telling a story.

"I also loved the idea of Simone living in the '80s with the hair and shoulder pads, and what the relationship to the cheating is for each character, as it has an unexpected ending."

The daughter of Taiwanese immigrants, Lucy was raised in the Jackson Heights neighbourhood of Queens, in New York City, and initially planned to pursue a degree in Asian languages and culture at the University of Michigan.

But she also secretly dreamed of becoming an actor, studying old Charlie Chan movies, and finally raised the nerve to audition for a supporting role in a college production of Alice in Wonderland in her final year.

Lucy was astonished when she landed the lead role, and it was all the encouragement she needed. As soon as she graduated, she broke the news to her parents that, despite her freshly inked college degree, she was moving to LA to become an actor.

After appearing in a string of TV shows including E.R. (1995, three episodes) and Ally McBeal (1998-2002, 79 episodes), she landed film roles in Charlie's Angels (2000), Chicago (2002) and Kill Bill Vol. 1 (2003).

Lucy looks back and sees her young self as more guileless than driven, hardly the Asian trailblazer breaking stereotypes in Hollywood that she's become.

"I think I was just too naive and didn't know what was ahead of me or what I was going to be up against," she admits. "I had some idea when I got to LA, because a friend of mine would have 10 auditions in a day or a week and I would have maybe two or three in a month, so I knew it was going to be much more limited for me.

"But then I got really lucky with a few jobs, which put me in rooms for auditions where I looked like no other woman in the room. I thought, ‘I don't even understand why I'm here, but I'm going to give it my all.'

"I think when you are somewhat the black sheep, you don't really have anything to lose, because they are not necessarily looking for you. So you may as well go for it!"

Some reviewers have compared Why Women Kill's catty Simone to uber-bitch Alexis Carrington (Joan Collins) in the iconic '80s soap opera Dynasty. "I didn't really watch Dynasty because I couldn't relate to it as a child of immigrant parents, and I didn't understand that kind of wealth and the claws coming out to scratch you," says Lucy.

"But as you go on in life, you start to understand a little bit more what that pop culture was. When I started doing Charlie's Angels and went back to that era to see the representation of those women at that time, I realised they weren't just all kitschy, but they were also incredibly smart and sexy."

As friendly and accessible as Lucy is, she's also full of pride when asked about her son. Has she used some of their isolation time to introduce him to her voice work as Viper in the animated Kung Fu Panda films? Definitely not, the protective mum replies. "He doesn't know what I do. All he thinks is that I'm an artist and I'm a mommy – and that's enough for now."

Rockwell was born in 2015 via gestational surrogate after Lucy made the decision to become a single parent. "Elementary was the longest job I ever had and it gave me the ability to stay in one place, because we were syndicated and we knew we were going to be making a certain number of shows," she explains.

"So that was also the impetus for me to think, ‘Maybe I can have a family of my own.' It wasn't like I was making bad decisions before that, but I had made the choice to prioritise my career. Then, one day, I just felt like it wasn't enough. I didn't want to look back in 30 years and realise I was still having the same conversations about my job every day. I wanted more."

Lucy gets emotional while talking about how motherhood has changed her. "It's almost become this cellular feeling of connecting to the universe in a way where you understand the idea of the cycle of life and the responsibility of having another being who is a part of you but outside of yourself. It's a very different feeling to doing a project where you know you will finish and move on. This is a life-long decision that changes your life and prioritises things in a very positive way."

Given how candidly she has spoken about going it alone as a parent, it's surprising how little she's volunteered about her personal life. She explains it is all by design: she has never spoken publicly about her relationships, although online stories have flagged a handful of boyfriends, including a three-year relationship with actor Will McCormack that ended in 2008, and a relationship with Israeli-American shoe tycoon Noam Gottesman in 2010.

"I've always been very private and I fly under the radar as much as possible," she says. "I do that in a very specific manner. I don't bring people I'm dating to any public event because it's a big responsibility that I'm not sure anyone wants.

"Your work is your legacy and you want to be able to do more each time, and change so you can continue to have some kind of value," says Lucy, who has also been a producer and director. "You don't want people thinking of you as just someone who dated someone and getting distracted from your work."

For now it seems Lucy Liu's legacy is doing just fine, thank you.Lucy gets emotional while talking about how motherhood has changed her. "It's almost become this cellular feeling of connecting to the universe in a way where you understand the idea of the cycle of life and the responsibility of having another being who is a part of you but outside of yourself. It's a very different feeling to doing a project where you know you will finish and move on. This is a life-long decision that changes your life and prioritises things in a very positive way."Given how candidly she has spoken about going it alone as a parent, it's surprising how little she's volunteered about her personal life. She explains it is all by design: she has never spoken publicly about her relationships, although online stories have flagged a handful of boyfriends, including a three-year relationship with actor Will McCormack that ended in 2008, and a relationship with Israeli-American shoe tycoon Noam Gottesman in 2010."I've always been very private and I fly under the radar as much as possible," she says. "I do that in a very specific manner. I don't bring people I'm dating to any public event because it's a big responsibility that I'm not sure anyone wants."Your work is your legacy and you want to be able to do more each time, and change so you can continue to have some kind of value," says Lucy, who has also been a producer and director. "You don't want people thinking of you as just someone who dated someone and getting distracted from your work."For now it seems Lucy Liu's legacy is doing just fine, thank you.

[dear-space-cadet]

10 Questions Tag

thanks @musicofglassandwords for the tag!

1. Do you conciously take inspiration from authors or books you love, or from your genres? Or do you actively try to avoid it?

Honestly, yeah, I do. Considering my ventures into sports journalism, I’ve taken a lot of inspiration from Jon Bois and the SB Nation gang, most prominently the Tim Tebow CFL Chronicles. It has that exact level of surrealist realism that I aim for in my writing and that and 17776 kind of been the holy grail of inspiration for my recent writing. I kind of feel like I’m plagiarizing because Jon Bois is the only writer in the game doing surrealist sports writing, but hey, he’s a football guy and I’m a basketball guy, and he’s never written about a mascot that is out to kill the players it represents, and I don’t think he’s ever written Ersan Ilyasova as a monster hunter, either. But still. Holy grail of inspiration.

2. Do you write fanfiction, do roleplaying, or other kinds of fan activity? How do these things influence the way you create original work? Do you feel they’ve given you valuable “tools” in your “creative toolbox?”

Yes, I write fanfiction. And I’m proud of it. I’ve been writing fanfiction since I was eleven years old writing a Warrior Cats spin-off series. Nothing has helped me in the writing world more than writing fanfiction, because the world building and development is done, so you can just screw around and do basically whatever you want with it. Most of my fanfictions end up being somewhere in the realm of surrealism, realistic sci-fi/fantasy, or just straight up, old fashioned realistic fiction with some wacky variable pulled in, like, they’re all suddenly in art school *cough* itao. Fanfiction is so much fun to write, too, and it helps you learn things like plot structure, character arcs/development, and how to write an original story, especially while working in the world of something already established.

Even for nonfiction writing, fanfiction helps you figure out things like sentence structure and narrative while playing around in a completely inconsequential world. I think fanfiction might be the most valuable tool you can have as any kind of writer.

3. Do you use WorldAnvil (or something like it) for worldbuilding purposes, or do you prefer to use your own methods/systems for worldbuilding?

Nah. Most of my worldbuilding is adapted from the real world when I worldbuild anyway, because even when I delve into sci-fi/fantasy I like to keep it mostly realistic to the standards set on earth.

4. How do you choose your characters’ appearences? Do you use generators, choose face claims, make sketches, or something else?

I usually just look around on Pinterest for someone who vaguely matches the depiction I already have in my head. My characterizations can change on a whim, though, like if I see a tiktok of someone with a character’s very specific energy sometimes I can change their appearance just based on that.

5. What are your favorite tropes to read about or watch? Are they the same as the tropes you yourself most like to use in your writing?

I love whump and hurt/comfort. Even if I don’t mean to, my stories ALWAYS incorporate aspects of whump and hurt/comfort. There’s basically no escape. I love reading it, and I love writing it so I can read it later, and it’s such a habit to write it that it always just ends up being a plot point. I always have sort of a designated whumpee as well and they’re always the exact same archetype of character: that caring but silly romantic-comic relief character. Whether it’s Constantine in Forever and Ever, Amen or Andy in Sleep It Off, it’s always the exact same archetype. I’d like to switch it up but it’s always about liking what I’m writing, and I’m just not tired of this yet. Yes, most of my fics are this way as well and you can definitely pick out the archetype, but considering the vast majority of my fics are real person fanfiction, I’m not going to name names or anything.

6. Do you have a network of writer friends offline, such as a school club, writing workshop partners, etc.?

No, sadly. I have a couple writer friends and an English teacher I’m close with and I harass people for feedback but that’s really it. I’m hoping to find a community in college, though.

7. When looking for inspiration for a story, are you more likely to be drawn to visual or auditory elements? (Ex: would you browse through picture prompts, listen to music, seek out a written prompt, or something else?)

Music, always. Forever and Ever, Amen was inspired by a daydream I had while listening to Franz Ferdinand’s “Outsiders” one day on my way to school in my junior year of high school. You can listen to Caldwell and Constantine’s playlist here, if you want, because it was such an integral part of their story design.

8. Are the names of your characters and the places in your world important to you? How do you choose them?

My characters’ names usually just sort of pop up. When I was first making characters I always used sites like NameBerry to perfectly calculate a name: Polaris and Juneau and their whole little squad are total examples of this. When I introduced the Sideline Warriors, their names were all sort of randomly picked from wherever. Jacy just sort of came to me, Veridis and Voyager were Daft Punk songs, I’m an Aries, so screw it, there’s Aries. Most of the characters from Sleep It Off were either adapted in some way from real life, Kira being a slight misspelling of her inspiration’s name, Axel being named after the emo kid living in my head, Chuck being sort of a hint at my old crush, or they were adapted from songs, like Khalil (Khalil Gibran - STRFKR), Valencia (O, Valencia! - The Decemberists), and Andy (San Andreas - CVLTRALIGHT). Their names are always important, though, and I try not to reuse names as best as I can.

9. Do you utilize any personality types or tests to determine your characters’ personality, like Meyers-Briggs, enegrams, character archetypes, the four temperaments, alignment charts, the elements, Hogwarts houses, or even various types of astrology (Western Zodiac, Celtic tree, Chinese zodiac, etc.?)

I really don’t, but I definitely think about zodiac signs when choosing birthdays. Claudia is such a Taurus. Kira is a Virgo. Axel is an Aries. Andy’s a Capricorn because January 23rd came to me in a dream. Constantine is such a Leo, and Caldwell’s obviously a Pisces. You can kind of see this in each character’s personality so it’s always decided after their initial creation as a character. Make sense?

10. What is your favorite part of worldbuilding? (Ex: building cultures, mapmaking, history and timeline work, making conlangs, religion and mythology, plant and animal making, magic and technology systems…)

Most of my worldbuilding is meant to fit into the “real world,” so my favorite part of worldbuilding is probably odd quirks, like in Shitty Sixers Fanfiction, for example, Furkan Korkmaz freezing up whenever you make direct eye contact with him, or the fact that the team lives in Wells Fargo Center and lines up for Arby’s every morning, or the new NBA team called the Omaha Gophers featuring Jeremy Lin and Jimmer Fredette. It’s fun to give the story’s world its own little quirks and things specific to that universe, even if it’s fanfiction.

—

tagging @kindofwriter @klywrites @kiraawrites @fruzsiwrites @baconkat02 @h-faith-marr-writeblr @necros-writings @mercutioswriting ! use the same questions bc they’re lots of fun

[krinsbez]

My Transformers Fancon: Decepticon High Command, Part III

-Tarn of Nyon commands the Decepticon Secret Police, in charge of stomping out internal dissent, and personally leads the DSP's elite Justice Division, which hunts down and brutally kills defectors. As demonstrated by his renaming himself after Megatron's hometown and having his face remade into the Decepticon logo, no one is more loyal to Megatron and the Decepticon cause, not even Soundwave. For one, Soundwave justifies his loyalty by being deeply in denial about the monsters they've turned into, whereas Tarn has no such illusions, and is fanatically devoted anyways. Soundwave also has his own ambitions, whereas Tarn genuinely cares for nothing but seeing Megatron's will be done. Not having realized that Megatron views this slavish devotion with contempt, Tarn is completely baffled why Megatron values Soundwave more than him, and subsequently hates the Intelligence chief with the intensity of a supernova. The only person he hates more is Starscream, who routinely attempts to betray Megatron and yet somehow remains second-in-command. Depsite his attempts not to show his true feelings to his superiors, they're both well aware of it; Soundwave ignores it, except when he needs to manipulate the DSP commander, whereas Starscream finds Tarn's impotent rage hilarious and makes a point of provoking him for kicks. -Thunderwing of Iacon is the newest member of High Command. Powerful, skilled, brilliant and charismatic, he led his Mayhem Attack Squad to some of the Decepticons' greatest victories. He came up with Pretender shells (though the tech was perfected by Shockwave and Tarantulas). He has never shown the slightest hint of disloyalty. He is the only member of High Command that Megatron worries about; everyone else, Megs has a bead on, is totally confident he can take on, or both. Thunderwing, however, is a complete enigma, and is every bit as badass as Megatron. For this reason, Megatron took the unusual step of assigning one of the Megacons, Bludgeon, to serve under Thunderwing and thus keep an eye on him.

-Tyrannitron of the Sector 4/6.4-K Campaign is the youngest member of Decepticon High Command, having been born only a few million years ago (you can tell he's warborn because his name refers to his first battle rather than his place of birth). A brilliant strategist and tactician, and an equally adept personal manipulator, Tyrannitron is the commander of the Decepticon Battle Fleet. While he has shown himself quite capable of commanding troops in the field as he is ships in space, he ever commanded Vehicon drones planetside. This because, while a Point-One-Percenter like his parent Archforce (to whom he bears a striking resemblance) and thus able to punch far above his weight-class, he is a Mini-Con. Given the might-makes-right philosophy of the Decepticons, this would mean that, where he to lead ordinary troops, he would face constant challenges to prove his fitness to lead, which while he is confident of winning said challenges (again, Point-One-Percenter), he doesn't have the patience. On the upside, it also meant that, unlike, say, Thunderwing, he has managed to avoid setting off the suspicions of Megatron and his inner circle.

(thanks to @cirex101 for helping me with the next three)

Jhiaxus: Second best.  That is the phrase that most Decepticons, and even some Autobots, would describe Jhiaxus, a brilliant scientist.  Second best to Shockwave.  Jhiaxus knows this what his peers think of him, and it infuriates and drives him in equal measure.  In order to escape from under SHockwave's shadow he revolutionized the Decepticon's budding system, creating legions of warriors almost overnight.  However, these warrioers are little more than cheap cannon fodder for the Decepticon cause, and have a shorter life expectancy on the battlefield compared to the older Decpticon warriors, earning them the derisive nickname "Genericons".  At the urging of Shockwave, Megatron assigned the Genericon legions to mere garrison duties, or to throw them at Autobot defenses whenever Megatron needs to distract the Bots from his true objective.  This ignoble fate to what was once his crowning achievement only spurs Jhiaxus to improve upon his designs, upgrading the Genericons, an creating even more horrible monstrosities in his lab.

Currently, Jhiaxus is in command of ‘Con controlled Cybertron

Onslaught: A decorated veteran officer of the Primal Vanguard, Onslaught left that prestigious institution in defiance of Functionism's, and by extension, Senator Proteus', growing power on Cybertron.  Onslaught signed on with the Decepticon movement, and used his military knowhow to win several victories during the Functionist revolt.  Onslaught and his elite team, the Combaticons, were responsible for several daring raids into Autobot held territory, and gained a reputation for planning almost every outcome.  However, the old saying, "No plan survives contact with the enemy", rings true, and although he plans for almost anything, Onslaught cannot plan for every eventuality, and if enough things go wrong, will lose his cool and resort to simply blowing the slag out of the enemy.   This deficiency prevents Onslaught from moving up in the Decepticon Hierarchy, but he doesn't let it show on the surface, and is liable to kill anyone who attempts to taunt him. 

Razorclaw: While Onslaught plans ahead of the battle, Razorclaw makes his plans durring the middle of battle.  His ability to take the unexpected with a clear, cool head makes Razorclaw's Predacons one of the fiercest squads in the entire Decepticon war machine.  Emotionless almost to Shockwave's level, Razorclaw was a gladiator, but he and his team operated in Vos, and as such never met Megatron in the arena.  However, he had heard of Megatron, and pledged his loyalty to him at the onset of the Functionist Revolt, ruthlessly hunting down Proteus' supporters with a silent enthusiasm that was as unnerving as it was effective.   Razorclaw is straightforward, and doesn't seek advancment in the ranks, seemingly content in his current position.  Some see this as laziness, but if you look beneath his contentment, you will see that Razorclaw is one of the most dangerous Decepticons because of this; he cannot be bought, bribed, intimidated, cajoled, or manipulated.  All that matters to him is the hunt, and many an unfortunate Con that got on his badside became the prey. 

BTW, something I tried to indicate but I'm not sure came through. There were two kinds of gladiatorial combat on Cybertron prior to the Great War, Arena Games, which were legal, restricted to trained gladiators, and had strict rules to minimize lethality, and Pit Fights, which were illegal, anyone can have a go, and the only rules are to put on a good show and try not to kill the audience. Mind, given how much punishment TFs can take, Pit Fights aren't that much more brutal or lethal than Arena Games. The real appeal of the Pit Fights is in their unpredictability; you can see a master of Metallikato go up against some big guy with a rocket punch, see a Beast-former take on a Tank, or who knows what.

Anyways, Razorclaw was an Arena Gladiator, because (as SB and SV poster Q99 put it...)

Razorclaw is a smart fighter, and he loves outfighting his opponents. Arena Fighters are almost all trained combatants at the upper levels, of the type he loves defeating, so once he's in the upper ranks his foes are almost all high-quality... though still not a match for him. Pit Fighters, you're more likely to see foes rely on raw power or a gimmick, and while he respects the more skilled fighters there, he doesn't want to waste time with the 'chaff' who got in because they happen to be a tank or such, or deal with silly 'three lesser bots vs one champ' matches, and as pit fighters are less regimented even good fighters there spend more time dealing with that kind of thing.

Which adds a bit of tension because Megatron and half of High Command were Kaonian Pit Fighters, so naturally they're going to think poorly of a Vosian Arena Gladiator. BTW, speaking of raw power versus skill, I imagine that... -Megatron, of course, is both hella powerful and crazy skilled

-Thunderwing is as well.

-Shockwave is actually a terrible fighter but makes up for her lack of skill with raw power.

-Starscream is the opposite; physically the weakest member of High Command, but makes up for it with skill.

-Scorponok is a beast, and he's got raw talent at fighting, but has no polish or finesse.

-Cryotek's strong, and used to be a good fighter, but he's rusty.

-Soundwave is a good mix of power and skill.

-Tyrannitron is similar, but has a fondness for trickery, head games, and such.

-Tarn is just this side of invincible, but finds brute force distasteful.

(the next three are thanks to @cirex101 again)

-Jhiaxus is unskilled, makes up for it with power, but not to the same extant as Shockwave.

-Onslaught has strength, but finesse he saves for his strategies.

-Razorclaw is both skilled and strong, but not to the same extant as Megatron, or Thunderwing.

-Dirt Boss was a scrappy little guy who always preferred to cheat. This may be one of the reasons he's dead.

Now I know what you’re thinking; Dirt Boss? You didn’t mention Dirt Boss. That’s because he’s dead, having been killed by Prowl. Before that, Dirt Boss was commander of the Combat Engineering Corps, and a member of Megatron's inner circle. Since his death, the Constructicons have resisted any attempt to appoint a permanent replacement and instead take turns holding the office. Megatron is not happy about this, but is unwilling to make an issue of it.

A few bits and bobs about Deception High Command:

-The Megacons are not technically members of High Command, but as Megatron's personal goon squad, each member holds comparable authority. In addition to the original line-up (sans Bludgeon) of Airachnid, Blackout, Thunderblast, and Lugnut, they've since added Lugnut's lover Strika, her conjunx Obsidian, and Megatron's personal medic, Scalpel. -A personality conflict I neglected to mention; while she doesn't act on it, Shockwave really doesn't like Cryotek, for reasons that should be obvious. -I haven't figured out what Tarn did before the War; I can't decide if he was also a Pit Fighter or if he did something else. What do you guys think?

-In addition to Shockwave and Tarantulas, a surprising number of the top Decepticons have science backgrounds (thanks to SVer KageX)

For Starscream since he was leader of the Exploration Corps perhaps his expertise lies not in the lab developing new weapons but in "surveying" areas and coming up with ways to exploit resources as well as how to survive in them. Think of the difference between a Geologist and a Chemist. Yes there is some overlap, but they focus on different areas of application. Starscream focuses on planning "field operations" and harvesting resources in his area of scientific expertise. He would know how to fix a shuttle, but it would not be his area of expertise, just something he picked up along the way as he was exploring distant areas of the universe. It would also explain his slippery nature, as this job would likely involve meeting with and negotiating with Alien Races. So Starscream became quite good at "negotiations" and other political endeavors.

- Shockwave is a polymath who is a master of all fields of hard science. Jhiaxus is more specialized; he does cybergenetics, mechanobiology, electronics, etc. but if you ask him about astrophysics or climatology, he's got nothing. Scorponok is interested in organic biology, but doesn't advertise this, since your average 'Con is at best apathetic about organics, and many actively hate 'em. Thunderwing is a dabbler; he reads scientific journals*, and will periodically come up with a clever idea, but doesn't really pursue the sciences.

-How Thunderwing came up with Pretender Shells: after conquering a particular planet, he made a point of studying their tech base, realized that some of their tech could be combined with Cybertronian tech to do something interesting, and sent Shockwave a memo. Shockwave agreed he was onto something, and she and Tarantulas made something out of it.

[pxiao]

My thoughts on Y_saku

So I have been keeping up on Vr, I hate myself for it by the way, but kept it quiet here because I have nothing good to say about it. BUT episode 69 finally pushed my limit on the protagonist so let’s finally get on why I hate this ass and consider him the most pathetically written main character thus far. If you’re a fan of Y_saku, don’t read cause you know what you’re getting into. 

First let me state what I hate about him on a personal level aka this is just my personal opinion which are, PM is a huge asshole, his voice annoys me and his design tries too hard to be dark and edgy that it hurts to see every time. I like protagonists that are nice or at least have good intentions. Ego has always pissed me off and for better or for worse Y_saku has a lot of ego. It was fine at first but 60+ episodes plus it’s annoying how he acts like he’s the best around and the SHOW AGREES WITH HIM. I LOATHE his VR design, it’s too much. His hair looks stupid and yes I know this is YGO but there are limits like with Zxl, VR pushed it too far. His body suit is ugly to look at and they try TOO hard to make him look muscular. I get it, you’re trying to get the fangirls BUT I’M SICK OF LOOKING AT IT. His voice is the worst, it doesn’t sound natural at all. He always has the same forced, deadpan voice. You can tell how forced it sounds compared to the Va’s original voice, it hurts to hear as I can feel how badly the va is trying. Overall Y_saku as a character annoys my senses from my vision and hearing. 

Now for the objective analysis. Y_saku has no character. Wait that’s wrong, he has only one character trait, he has PTSD and that’s it. I’m serious all of season 1 kept stating, “HE WANT REVENGE AND HE WILL GET IT!” Everything we learn about him is related to his torture. His three things tick? He learned it when he was tortured. He wants revenge? He was tortured and wants to know why. He’s a good duelist? He was tortured to win. AND THAT’S ALL. His stoic nature is due to his ptsd and well what you see HE GOT THAT CAUSE HE WAS TORTURED!  Try to define Y_saku without saying their role in the story, what they look like or what they do. All you get is quiet, stoic guy. That’s not a functional personality at all, it’s just an attitude. That is the description to EVERY CLICHE ANTIHERO EVER. What are his dreams, his desires? What does he like? What does he dislike outside of the KOH? Does he even like the hot dogs he keeps eating cause he sure as hell doesn’t seem to enjoy it! His goals and dislikes are focused on his past and thus season 2 when he’s past his revenge, he’s just there. We have not learned a single thing about him for the 20+ episodes that Season 2 has been going on. He’s just focused on saving his acquaintance’s brother’s soul thing. Y_saku is a blank slate with some traits grafted on which you can tell, HE HAS NO BACKSTORY cause he “lost his memories” how  conveniently. But we have the backstory of every nearly other “major” character. Go said his backstory in his duel against SB, SB had an entire mini arc about his backstory, Kus_ngai had his backstory in another flashback arc right after SB had his, Re_olver got to tell his when Y_saku confronted him at the end of season 1 and Spe_tre, Ak_ra and A_i got their backstories revealed in their duels against Y_saku. Y_saku and GG alone don’t have a backstory. Y_saku is the MAIN CHARACTER and it’s not like his goal is to get his memories back, he doesn’t care. So if we do get his backstory is a mystery! Y_saku is bland and it annoys me that people love him anyway. 

His plot armor. I know YGO has HORRIBLE plot armor BUT Y_saku deserve mention BECAUSE OF HOW THICK IT IS. Y_saku winning all of his duels is annoying but that can passed if they’re fun. They aren’t due to two reasons. His SKILL and his monotonous dueling. SKILL is not the same as his skills, they are different, his SKILL being Storm Access. Storm Access is the most blatant asspull so far and is more annoying than Shining Draw because Y_SAKU USES IT NEARLY EVERY DUEL. And the only reason he doesn’t use it every duel is because HE CAN’T due to the master duels prevent skills from being used. But speed duels? HE ALWAYS ABUSES IT which makes us question how good is Y_saku if everytime he gets in a corner his first reaction is, well time to make a random card to get out of this situation. The other protagonists minus Y_ma would use whatever cards they have on hand to solve their situation. PM? NOOOOO, HIS REACTION IS TO CHEAT! There is nothing to root for. I’m not praising his skill nor his cunning, I’m praising his luck! And because of his dependence on this his dueling is roughly the same thing. I’ll get my lifepoints below 1000 to use it and then use thousands of link summons to get to the final one. Every single one of this duels are like this with season 2 adding BUT NOW THE LINKS SEARCH TO SUMMON THE OTHER METHODS! YAY. His dueling is the same damn thing and we know he’s going to win. There isn’t any reason to watch him. And it gets better when he learn that his deck WASN’T EVEN BUILT BY HIM! Dueling is 90% deck building and then 10% using it right. Since Y_saku was given the “best deck”, honestly it isn’t cause his cards are pure shit except Firewall but he barely uses HIS ACE but in-universe they’re considered the best, that essentially means he was HANDED THE BEST WEAPON IN THE SERIES and we’re expected to consider him good for being ok with it. 

Y_saku is loved BY EVERYONE, the show included, especially the show. EVERYONE WORSHIPS THE GUY, he’s considered the hero of Link Vr_ins by episode 3 BY BEATING A MOOK which also has a net show openly say he’s good looking. The makes a point to show he’s hyper popular with Go’s orphanage LOVING HIM, we cut from A_i’s duel with Sp_ctre to show a kid copying Y_saku’s vr avatar and saying he’ll defend Link Vr_ins and we get gratuitous shot of PM protecting the kid and saying I’ll protect whatever the setting is all in A_I’S FOCUS EPISODE! GG’s focus episodes ends with her saying PM is INVINCIBLE! And K_sangai says PM is invincible. EVEN THE KOH SAY WOW PM IS SUCH A BADASS THAT HE KICKED OUT ASSES LAST SEASON, AI who was HIS SLAVE now worships the guy. The only character that dislikes him is a one-off cocky bully aka we’re meant to hate him cause he dares to hate the PERFECT YU_AKU. The show bends over backwards to make us love him but they jumped the gun. It’s obvious we’re supposed to love him because of how “cool” he is and it REFUSES TO STOP. Nearly every episode has at least one character talk about how smart, how strong or how amazing PM is when he has done really nothing to deserve it and no personality to justify us liking him.

Y_saku is HORRIBLE representation for mental illness. I don’t mean his PTSD is unrealistic, a therapist friend of mine says it’s actually realistic. IT’S HOW THE SHOW TREATS IT.  Y_saku states he went through therapy for his PTSD and it didn’t work so he went to REVENGE. As someone that has a mental disorder that plague me for year and at the worst of it, I considered suicide and later got therapy. THAT’S NOT HOW THERAPY WORKS. Therapy isn’t a magic thing that will magically fix you, it depends on how much the patent wants to get better. You can take as many therapy sessions as you want and if you don’t TRY to get better, you’re wasting your time and money. I’m not saying all therapy or therapists are effective BUT you can’t just say well this one didn’t work, therapy doesn’t work at all. Therapy is about FIGHTING your mental disorder to try to fix it, it’s not as simple as going through your memories and finding the reason you’re messed up. Honestly this suggest that Y_saku is a wimp that couldn’t fight his disorder and is instead RUNNING FROM IT. The show even has the GALL to say his PSTD makes PM better. A_ira has said PM’s issues means he finds himself in victory and thus when he duels, he tries as hard as he can to win. That’s BULLSHIT. If he really did have PSTD, anytime he was in danger of losing then he would freak out that he would get shocked and make a lot of mistakes to make sure it doesn’t happen. Anxiety isn’t the same as being worried, it’s all consuming. It makes it hard to think, eat or sleep. You can’t think of anything but what you’re scared of happening and that takes over your mind. You can’t do anything, it doesn’t make you try real hard, it messes with you. But not PM, NOPE IT MAKES HIM BETTER KIDS. 

Finally the reason for this post. His hypocrisy. Episode 69 has him DARE TO say REVENGE WON’T LET YOU MOVE ON. HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHA SHUT THE FUCK UP, YOU FUJO BAIT BLANK SLATE! You see when he dueled A_ira, A_ira made a point of saying maybe they shouldn’t let a teen send his youth fighting terrorists and try to be happy while he, an adult whose company had been the focus on said terrorist attacks, deals with them. PM BLOWS HIS FUCKING LID AND SAYS, “YOU HAVE NO IDEA ABOUT ME” and essentially has a temper tantrum about how HE HAS TO GET revenge and wins with A_ira giving on trying to convince PM so the show is essentially agreeing with PM that he needs his revenge. And now that PM has got it, HE DARES TO SAY THAT TO SOMEONE ELSE. Which is laughable as he got cured because he was in a tough spot and thought maybe it would be nice to have friends, not that he ever tried to make them when A_ described his friends. That’s not development as by this point PM had already GOT his revenge. PM wanted to know why he was tortured, which he learned BECAUSE HE KEPT OBSESSING ABOUT HIS REVENGE. His revenge let him meet Re_olver which result in Dr. Kog_mi, the man who TORTURED him, to die. And due to said revenge, he got to meet A_ who helped him “develop”. Overall he could only get better BECAUSE HE CARED FOR REVENGE. HE HAS NO RIGHT TO SAY THAT EVER. 

Overall Y_saku is an inconsistent sloppy written character. In fact watch this video and try to not think about Y_saku when watching, I couldn’t. 

[tmcastandcrew]

AccessReel’s Phil Jeng Kane spoke with Simon Baker about BREATH

You can listen to the interview HERE

AR: You had a Premiere at the Gold Coast Film Festival last night. How did that go?

SB: It’s always a bit heightened for me, it seemed to go pretty well. My ability to analyse how well these things went is not that great. People stuck around for the Q&A and obviously they were very forthcoming in praise to me, but I don’t think people are going to stop me and say, “that film sucked”. Again, I’m not really sure how accurate my analysis is.

AR: Did it feel different to how it was received at Toronto or Zurich (Film Festivals)?

SB: It was actually received quite well in Zurich. It was subtitled in German and they’re a land-locked country, but people identify with the ideas, themes of identity, fears and working out who you are. I think that came across. In Toronto, it was very hard for me because it was the first public screening, so my experience of it was all about sweaty palms and shifting in my seat constantly. That was an out-of-body experience, I couldn’t really tell you how the film played at all. (laughs)

AR: What was different about directing a feature as opposed to directing episodes of The Mentalist?

SB: When I direct for The Mentalist it’s an eight-day shooting period, I have a seven-day prep period and then I cut it in three days. Whereas this one had eight weeks of official prep, six weeks of shooting and I cut it over fourteen-fifteen weeks and then you go into the nitty-gritty of sound design, colour-grading and sound-mixing. It’s a very different animal, it’s far more detailed and far more intense. There’s more control over the different elements to be had, because you’re making it for the cinema.

AR: The surfing sequences seemed really complex. Did you spends weeks and weeks directing from a boat?

SB: From the water, mate. Or on a jet-ski. I was in most of the scenes. We had a boat for a couple of days, that basically the First A.D. stayed on and we could go and get dry on and then we could jump back in. Shooting on water is incredibly difficult and the ratio of usable footage is pretty slim. So a lot of it is about post-production and putting it together in the order in which you put it together. And being flexible with the narrative based on the footage that you have. There’s an element of “found-footage” cutting, almost like documentary making, when you’re doing that. I’ve grown up surfing, so I wanted it to feel authentic.

AR: You’re an avid surfer, was there anything you had to learn to surf like Sando?

SB: No, not really. It was about keeping everything within the parameters of authentic for me. Also I’d done a lot of research. Over the years, I’d always been into the evolution of the sport, the evolution of the aesthetic related to the sport, the art associated with the sport. I look at it as a sort of lifestyle more than anything.

AR: Were you keeping an eye on the authenticity of the time period?

SB: All of it. That’s your job as the director. Keeping an eye on all of that. So anything in the dressing and the set that distracted you from the story was gone. That what your job is as a director, to oversee all of that stuff. That’s the joy of it. You’re the first and last line of defence, so if something slips through, it’s your fault.

AR: When you read Tim Winton’s book, how much overlap did you feel there was with your own childhood in Australia?

SB: A massive amount of overlap. But I don’t think I was alone on that. I think there was a lot people that were affected by that for the same reason. What was also interesting about Tim’s work, this particular book, was that it took people who hadn’t grown up on the coast, land-lubbers, and plonked them out in the ocean and made them feel like they’d experienced it. I think it’s the best piece of literature I ever read describing the experience of being in the ocean. Surfers felt that, for sure, across the board.

AR: Was Tim Winton always going to be the narrator of the film?

SB: No. I had no idea who the narrator was going to be. I didn’t want a sort of “movie” voiceover feel, I wanted a “vox-pop” like someone sitting down in their living room, telling a story and just taking snippets of it. I wanted a very normal, ordinary voice that felt authentic. I didn’t want that silky voiceover sound a lot of Hollywood films have. And Tim visited the set at the beginning, we’d just started shooting and he was leaving. He said, “Give us a call if you need anything.” I said, “Listen mate, I’ve got this voiceover stuff and just as an idea, because I want a regular person to record this voiceover, I was wondering if you could put it down for me?” And he was like, “Ooooh, I dunno. OK.” And he recorded it into his phone. And I cut the film to his recording from his mobile phone.

I just fell in love with how kind of “normal” it was. And how unforced it felt. Then I got an actor to re-record it. And with voiceover you have to play around with it, and look at it, to know if it feels right. The actor did a wonderful job, but I missed Tim’s voice and they were his words. And I thought, fuck, why not? So I called him up and said, “Mate, I want to stay with yours, but I need to come over to W.A. and record it a bit better because it’s pretty shitty, the mobile phone recording of it.” He was like,”OK, mate.” There’s just an “every-man” quality to his voice that just felt real.

AR: Richard Roxburgh is in the film and is also an actor-director. Did he have any advice for you?

SB: I think it would have been weird if Richard had started trying to give me advice. He’s not that kind of guy. He really liked the material and he’s very professional. If you look at Richard’s work, that performance is a very different performance than you’ve ever seen him give before. He’s not often that still. He’s a very technical actor and often he’s very busy, so I loved seeing him being really understated. The silence of Richard was really nice. He’s normally cast as the more verbose characters that are very active. It was nice to see him in a more passive role that had gravitas to it.

AR: Because you were the only one of the actors who can’t speak to the director, was there something extra you had to do to direct your own performance?

SB: Not really. I think if the casting is right, then the actor gets it. I think sometimes with actors it’s what you don’t say to them is what works. Sometimes you can fill them with too many thoughts and every actor is different. They’re all individuals. I prefer directing and it was a nice relief when I didn’t have to act and direct. As a director you have to play all the roles, to a degree, in your head. You have to have empathy for all the characters.

AR: Are you planning on directing another feature?

SB: I don’t have hard plans at this point but I am very interested at working more as director. I might have a rest after this. It takes a lot out of you.

Phil Jeng Kane.

[lucidentia-sb]

Eye For Film: Simon Baker talks about making Breath

Bodies in the water Simon Baker on fathers, sons, a rescue dog and Breath

People who feel they have nothing to lose can make for dangerously captivating friends. Death and water in the old romantic tradition float together hand in hand. Two boys, Pikelet (Samson Coulter) and Loonie (Ben Spence) live in a small, spread out, Western Australian coastal community in the Seventies. Baker's directing heart beats for authenticity. Riding bikes on dusty roads, catching waves among presupposed sharks, and growing up to become a man - large universal truths peek out from underneath the realism in depicting the boys' lives.

Sando (Baker), a surfing champion, lives in what could be described as an enchanted, slightly disheveled tree house for grownups with his girlfriend Eva (Elizabeth Debicki), a former professional skier, and their unwavering dog Rooster. The boys are fascinated by Sando's world, as both see in him an alternative role model to their respective fathers. Mr Pike (Richard Roxburgh) likes to pot plants, whereas Loonie's dad (Jacek Koman) has a cruel streak that puts him in an altogether more hazardous category.

This is a story of fathers and sons, friendships and betrayals, boredom and excitement, sea monsters and seduction, choosing who one wants to be like and the very different process of becoming it. Much is communicated by a well-placed gesture, the choice of a cup, a nap on the veranda or a fishing trip declined only to later be accepted. Simon Baker discerningly doesn't shy away from the tragic dimension we sense in Breath from the very first shot but for whose confirmation we have to wait until the final die is cast.

Anne-Katrin Titze: You must have put a lot of thought into the beginning and how you wanted to start with the swimming bodies. We are thinking: Is this two boys? Is it a boy and a girl? Is it a boy and a mermaid? Is it a merman? Who are they? It's a fantastic way to start this story. Did you always know this was the way?

Simon Baker: Yeah, it was sort of an interesting way to enter into a film. More so to create this slight sense of foreboding in the opening sequence. Like, is he stuck and drowned or is he...

AKT: … alive, yes, and we don't even know who that is.

SB: No.

AKT: The theme of fear and death is already there.

SB: Look at you, you got a book of notes!

AKT: These are for Whit Stillman, actually, whom I just interviewed.

SB: Oh, wow.

AKT: About The Last Days Of Disco. It's quite different, although the time frame is similar. I noticed a plate in a car in your film, stating 1978.

SB: Oh you saw that?

AKT: I did.

SB: On the sticker, yeah. That was towards the end of the film. Basically I hate putting numbers on screens and saying it's 19 whatever. I just wanted the production design tell that story. I guess you see the kids grow up, really. You see them develop into young men. Roughly it sort of spans for Pikelet - it is like 13 1/2 to about 17 by the end, 16, 17.

AKT: It's universal, childhoods take place on bikes.

SB: Yes.

AKT: I could identify very much. You go everywhere on your bike, with friends, with stuff you carry. Was that your experience?

SB: It was exactly that. And that's when you had those conversations. You would just talk about stuff. And reveal different things and learn different things about each other. Always kind of getting from one place to the other.

AKT: So it's not actually that different from Whit Stillman's walking and talking and here the bikes.

SB: He has bikes in his films?

AKT: No, he doesn't. You do.

SB: I have not seen that film for many many years.

AKT: It has its 20th anniversary, that's why I was talking to him about that. In your film you have a fantastic dog. How did you find him?

SB: He's just a local dog. He's not an acting dog at all. He's one of those dogs that rescues people. Like if someone is lost, he'll go and find them. If your kid's missing in the woods, in the bush, and you give the dog the smell of the kid's T-shirt or something like that, it'll sleep the night with the T-shirt and then they take him off to the area and the dog will go off and find it.

We had Jed, the dog's name was Rooster in the movie. And Jed's trainer, she wasn't a trainer for film dogs. That was the first time she worked on a film and she just lived in that town.

AKT: That moment when you call the dog and he comes and jumps on the truck.

SB: Jumps in the back?

AKT: Yes, there's fearlessness. This dog is a perfect connection to the characters, to Loonie - the kind of creatures your character attracts. The clothes work well in the film. Beautiful sweaters you are wearing.

SB: The sweater that I wear, the grey one? My mom knitted that!

AKT: Wow, congratulations to your mother! These are very much of the period. And timeless as well. They say a lot about the people who wear them.

SB: Yeah, they're beautiful. All hand-made. Beautiful hand-made sweaters. And Loonie has a little cardigan at one point, knitted.

AKT: All of them by your mother?

SB: No, not all of them by my mother. Just mine.

AKT: How did the project come about? How did you end up with the novel [by Tim Winton]?

SB: I was given the novel by my producing parter Mark Johnson, seven or eight years ago now, just to sign on as a producer. And over time, when we were developing it and working on it, he asked me if I wanted to direct it. And basically I said, "Look, I'd love to."

And then it was about waiting for the time because I was working on a TV show which took up a lot of my life. And when I knew we were going to the last year of that TV show, I kind of wrapped up the development of the script.

AKT: And that TV show we are talking about?

SB: That was The Mentalist. And then as soon as that show finished I went back to Australia and opened an office to start trying to get this thing up and going and get the financing together. And we kept developing the script.

AKT: There are beautiful subtleties in the script where you don't spell it out. The boy falls down the stairs and we just get the comment that the father might have had something to do with this. And that's it. You leave it at that, which is much more powerful that if you'd had a scene.

SB: Yeah, I think so.

AKT: These are good decisions. Did you subtract a lot?

SB: That's my style. Is to try to just reduce and reduce and reduce. And really only leave anything that moves the development and understanding of the character and story forward. And that's it. And sometimes for me it's more about making space for behaviour. To watch these kids behave, to see their reactions.

So, case in point, when Loonie is on the veranda at Sando's house the first time they go there. And he's standing up on the veranda and Pikelet is like "What the … you shouldn't be up there!" And he goes "Don't get all fucking sulky." And he hits the thing and walks down and [Simon mumbles something as Loonie]. And Pikelet looks at him. The way they look and react to each other to me speaks far more than anything that they say.

AKT: True.

SB: All those details, I like them to be precise in their observations. There's a scene, you know, where the two boys are leaving Sando's after Eva's just come back. Loonie's on his bike riding out and he says: "There's no way I'd let my wife run the show. He lets her get away with so much shit." Which is this completely misogynistic comment.

AKT: Yeah.

SB: In the very next sentence, he says, not even a breath later, he says: "I reckon your mom's done scones?" Right? Which means I reckon your mom's made scones. And then he goes "I love your mom!" That's like this whole complexity of what's been mottled to him as a child is this misogynistic view. But his heart and instinct is: "I want to be nurtured. I love being nurtured."

AKT: The joy while he [Loonie] is eating during that first dinner. The way he is eating, the way he is drinking the milk! I haven't seen anyone drink milk with such exuberance. It's full of life, which makes a lot of sense in the context you are dealing with.

SB: Yeah!