#although im not sure it's as prevalent in my fics as it is in my head HAHA

[seoafin]

I just need to tell you how much I love your writing. Especially how you write the mc bc it’s so angsty and beautifully crafted where every word is gut wrenching and makes me want to read more. In a way I relate to mc when I’m in my angsty moods 😭. I just love that they feel complex and have some sort of internal struggle. And despite the boys obvious affection for them, they’re too in their own head and drowning in their own insecurities that they can’t see it. And I LOVE IT!!

But anyhow love your writing! I hope you’re doing well on this fine evening ^_^

omg stopppppppppppppp everyone is being so nice to me today im screaming into the void rn YOU ARE VERY VERY SWEET THANK YOU!!!!

[mushyposts]

New ocs 👀

Or is just pov and I am confused 🤔

Either way I am so excited to see!!!!!

I also am kinda wondering what are you fire Nation laws?(Everyone has different ones)

not a new OC! Som very special people are getting POV's in the next chapter hehehe... Im not too sure what you mean by laws, so im gonna take it as a general "What are the major laws thatll effect the fic" kind of thing! The Fire Nation has legal banishment for everyone, which I mentioned offhandedly in the fic. You can send a document to the Fire Lord, but usually its seen by his representatives for that area, to get someone you are legally in charge of (your children, adopted or not, anyone ur the legal guardian of, OR if they've committed treason under the military branch ur in control of! although that can sometimes open u up to speculation, why are so many in ur command questioning our great nation??? What are you teaching them?) banished, this can be conditional (like Zuko's was) or it can be permanent. Sexuality isnt spoken about, theres technically no laws around homosexuality as it isnt even given as an OPTION, the only law that mentions it is that any relationship not mentioned by Agni's words, is not permitted and is seen as a crime against Agni, and is punishable by conditional banishment or even death in some spaces. Since Sozin removed any mention of homosexuality, polyamory, or honestly any relationship/gender outside the cishet binary, this means that without even MENTIONING the idea of homosexuality, as they did not want to even give a name to it as name is power, they've made it functionally illegal. Agni Kai MUST be fought between the parties who initiated it. The one who asks, the one who accepts, unless the Fire Lord says otherwise. This includes him taking the place of, or even permitting (read: Forcing) others to take place for either party. This is meant to be used to protect members who may be unable to properly fight, but still need to have their honour protected. It is. NOT used in that way, usually used as a way for two people engaged in an Agni Kai to try get as better fighter as they can OR Ozai may swap strong benders for weaker one where he wishes another party to win. There arent many laws around women or men's roles. Its more so centric around bender or non-bender. If you can bend, you're expected to do military service on the battle grounds. If you cant, then youre expected to do compulsory military service as a desk worker or something of the sorts. very low ranking, but still something. Very rare for non-benders to climb up the ranks, this got more prevalent during Ozai's rule. I think for the most part the Fire Nation would rule through the unsaid, the inexplicit. Propaganda, subtle laws, technicalities. Keeping their nation as in the dark as they can, lack of proper education/severely distorted education (This is displayed in canon too when Aang goes to the fire nation school.) and it was done slowly, subtly over the years of the war, through twisted narratives. I do believe in explicit laws being present, of course, but I also think sometimes the most dangerous of things said, is what is left unsaid. Lack of explicit, direct legislation, also would give Ozai the opportunity to use loopholes, or consistently falling on Agni's word seeing as he is Agni's will on earth, he can do whatever TF he wants. Less explicit, the better for him in the long run. UH! Thats all I can think of at this point hehe. Also to be clear I havent actually watched LOK, nor have I read all the comics, so this is all based on my own world building after years of obsession w ATLA and atp im too attached to it to let the other stuff change my mind i am SORRY... I also just dont have time ot read all the comics and watch LOK.

[a-slut-for-smut]

002 for Gojohime ;)

002 | Send me a ship and I will tell you:

Firstly, I just want to sincerely apologize for the delayed response! I honestly had terminal gojohime brainrot at the time of receipt and trying to answer this then would have made my goddamn head explode lolol

But thanks for sending in, best thing about these asks is they really help you evaluate why you feel the way you do about a character/ship so thanks for sending <3<3

When I started shipping them:

Right around when JJK season 1 anime started, although I actually wasn't watching the series but rather serendipitously stumbled across a complication of Gojo and Utahime interaction clips on youtube...the rest is history

My thoughts:

For Gojo, despite the teasing about her being weak its really his way of flirting because his other methods dont work (as far as getting that kind of direct attention from her). It's implicitly implied he trusts and cares for Utahime- going directly to her about the mole investigation and his train of thought immediately assessing her situation after he used purple hollow, among other things.

As for Utahime, i love how informal/combative she is with him despite him being the world's most powerful (and possibly unhinged) sorcerer- that doesnt seems to factor at all in their interactions and suggests to me a comfortable familiarity in their relationship.

Overall im just a huge whore for these two idiots- their chaotic dynamic reminds me very much of my relationship with my own himbo XD

What makes me happy about them:

I like to think Gojo's been madly in love with her for so long and his plan all along is to annoy her to the point where she becomes madly and homicidally in love with him which is a dynamic i LIVE for XD

What makes me sad about them:

Having been scarred by many a male shounen mangaka, i highly doubt they'll be made officially canon but a slut can dream eh?

Things done in fanfic that annoys me:

I havent read anything in nearly a year (currently suffering from readers block as i try to write my own fic) but does seem like a prevalent fanon is that Gojo is...uh, how to put this delicately.....rapey? (As far as smut fics go anyway, i dont read anything else lol). Not judging if thats what youre into, but anyone who knows me knows i have a mutual respect kink so its hard for me to invest in those kind of fics. Im a whore for my stupid soft simpy himbos :D

Also with Utahime 30+, i like to think that a) shes old enough to be comfortable with who she is as a person and wouldnt be insecure around an idiot like Gojo b) not a virgin/wasn't waiting just around for him. Mainly because im not into the "purity" culture or the whole notion of remaining a virgin makes a character objectively "pure" or "good"- it reeks of misogyny/patriarchal social conventions and i just cant vibe with it

Things I look for in fanfic:

hardcore smut duh (with explicit consent of course!)

My wishlist:

I'm not sure what this is referencing, but at the very least more canon interactions!!!

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other:

this question does not compute

My happily ever after for them:

My pragmatic side says just for them to be alive by the end given how the manga is progressing, but again being familiar with shounen mangaka habits its highly unlikely Gojo/their most popular character will be killed off unless Gege really goes full mad lad on us. And i dont see Utahime dying based on how shes handled in the manga so far but this could be a little white lie i tell myself??

As for my delulu brainrotty side: For them to be married with dozens of dozens of little gojos and utahimes XD

Anyway thanks again for the ask! Happy to answer more (and will try to be more timely in responses this time sorrrrry)

[jjheejz]

Im sorry to crash the party this late(?) but on your fate saga post 3 you mention a the untamed saga, just what happened?? >>

Although this is a JunZhe account, this post is focused on Xiao Zhan and Wang Yi Bo for awhile. :)

//

Hello anon,

No you're not late :)

Before I get to it, have to admit that I've only witnessed this saga in bits and pieces so the information may not 100% depict the whole story/cause.

However, the general takeaway is that, Xiao Zhan (XZ) solo fans, Wang Yi Bo (WYB) solo fans and BoJunYiXiao (BJYX as short form, cpname) cpfans don't get along. The latter is seen as the lowest level. They are viewed as feeding on fantasies and unrealistic ideals because these 2 actors are definitely not together as a couple in real life. There is "no future". (Despite this, on weibo, BJYX is still on a competitive position with JunZhe in the cp chart till now, rotating between top 1 and 2 - tbh, I somewhat only understand that BJYX hardcore fans does the tedious fan chart votes or sth daily rather hardworkingly).

Today (10 August screenshot): No.1 - BJYX, No.2 - LLD. Bonus below, No.11 - JunZhe

Of course, internationally, we dont think being a cpfan is a problem. Sometimes we just like both actors interactions, doesnt matter if they are real or not, but in the Chinese (hardcore) solo fans fandom, to them it's somewhat on this kind of perspective:

1. These 2 are actors = bound to have competition with each other (brand endorsements, sales, roles, show appearances etc), therefore, in order to build their future career, many choose to side one of them rather than both (not sure of the rationale of siding one rather than both). So most cpfans end up diverting to become solo stans. It's a realistic, long-term kind of thing. Some just end up preferring one over another, and some as we all know exists - prefer one of them as their own ideal fantasy boyfriend (the chinese term is 梦女 meng nv - 'dreaming girl'). These are also apparent in Gong Jun and Zhang Zhe Han solo fans.

2. XZ's AO3 saga: In brief, basically this was an extremely huge issue in 2020 (referred to as "227" - the date of seriousness) and was blown up very badly because it innocently involved those who doesnt know XZ and WYB, to a bad end. AO3 is a famous fanfic site, even internationally, but because of a BJYX fanfic, a group of extremely toxic XZ fans blew it up to the point this site was banned in China. Frequent Chinese writers and readers used this site for all kinds of fanfics (drama, anime, general writing etc) had their works and account gone overnight, so this grew an immense emotionally intense hatred on onlookers/passerbys/unrelated to them AO3 users to XZ and his fans.

This technically had something to do with cpfans since the fic was written by one of them, so yea. Imagine the hatred Chinese AO3 users have on XZ. Even now, I still see people hating on him for it despite it being the toxic fans fault. And obviously that group of XZ extremely toxic fans ain't going to self-reflect but push the blame, and they emerged even more hardcore...This saga's magnitude is beyond how my words can express so feel free to look it up - 227. It was just a mega large hurricane.

So, if XZ and WYB are in the same frame/drama again, the media is going to go wild in their articles. Solo fans are going to create even bigger fanwars with each other and it's really damaging to XZ's reputation for onlookers and passer-bys. WYB as well.

//

In the novel and drama, WangXian is always a couple.

But in real life, the actors are only temporarily Wei Wu Xian, and Lan Zhan. The real them is Xiao Zhan, and Wang Yi Bo, of which BJYX is unlike JunZhe.

Note: If anyone has anything to add/amend please feel free to do so! As mentioned, I've only witnessed in bits and pieces but because the magnitude was so big, everyone more or less had an idea about it, just that what I mentioned may not be the full picture.

Bonus: Just last month - July 2021, BJYX toxic fans started a war with JunZhe/LLD (to know the scale, let's just say, it involved photoshopping on to funeral portraits). So this further grew hatred on both XZ and WYB as some of them were AO3 users/onlookers of the 227 incident. Both cpfandom became straight up enemies. 🤦‍♀️

To them XZ knew this 227 issue blew up but he had never made a public apology or addressed it at all [this is going to be another post if I were to state my stand on why - subjectively]. As a general fan of BJYX, was apparently suspected of being a spy and toxic fan of them, entering LLD to create war - simply by following BJYX. So they grew tight on security and because of that last month, was kicked out of 4 LLD groups (not entirely due to following BJYX but somewhat related). 🥲

Anyway, no matter what, BJYX, XZ and WYB is a sensitive topic on weibo. They go by initial references there: XZ, WYB and last month's war, XZ's toxic fan is referred as 🦐 (idk the reason).

BJYX saga is just a prevalent childish hardcore fan issue + non-fans but brainwash lurkers creating chaos and watching this all (they get paid well to do this). The good Chinese weibo fans are really nice but sometimes I feel it's some kind of underground love story for cpfans of both JunZhe and BJYX on weibo.

I believe XZ and WYB themselves are in good terms, just cut apart by their own fandom. No matter what, both actors are hard workers and are nice people, please continue to support them if you are a fan of them too ^-^

Hope you gain some generic insights :)

Bonus bonus images:

Post update record:

[Edited an error, pointed out by Farrowuk] - Thank you :)

[hanibalistic]

hey!! i’ve been reading through your hyunjin works and just wanted to say i love the way you write him! of course, your writing is amazing for all the members too but for hyunjin you always mention how beautiful he is, and i’m amazed by how many different ways you’re able to do that bc it never feels repetitive!! and i’m also fascinated by how despite the emphasis on his etherealness he still feels human and real. ig that kinda sounds weird but a lot of the works i’ve read describe beauty in good-looking characters so much to the point where it ends up feeling a bit unreal and kinda hard to imagine. but you do it just the perfect amount, and always balance it out with other aspects of him! and i also love love the hyunjin’s dynamic with mc in all of your works, and love how much depth you give their characters too, the quirks and habits you assign, which goes for all your works too.

but i think what i like most about ur hyunjin fics is the atmosphere is each of them. i’m not exactly sure how to describe the feeling each gives me and certainly not eloquent enough to do it either, but there’s always this tenderness? it’s like your works of him are coated in this fuzzy pink tenderness but then if u look behind that layer you’d get this boundless cosmos of potent emotions—sometimes it takes me a second or third read to fully comprehend just how many emotions there are or how strong they are (or sometimes just to fully fathom how beautifully put together your words and sentences are lol)

maybe it’s that way for all of your works which i haven’t gotten through yet so forgive me if that isn’t true. and maybe im just hyunjin-deprived atm 😂

this doesn’t rlly make any sense lmao anyways point is you’re an amazing writer and i love your writing style!! thank you for giving me such wonderful experiences!

hello there (❁´◡`❁) this is a rather long ask that deserves a long answer so i am going to bust out the cute faces! first of all, thank you so much for reading my works! i am happy that you like them!

hyunjin... he is not my most well-written member, so i am surprised to hear so many compliments on my writing for his works (ෆ˙ᵕ˙ෆ) i do tend to focus on his looks a lot, mainly because i project into my writing a lot and well, i admire his appearances. but you are absolutely correct, ultimately i do not think ethereal is the word to describe hyunjin. if anything i think it degrades him in a sense. i explained it here in this ask, if you have not looked into it!

with all the kindness and affection he displays, hyunjin acts far too human, far too down-to-world for us to downgrade him to something we cannot explain. to just use a pretty word, like 'ethereal' to describe and call it a day. we can explain him, we can read him. that's the fundamental part of his beauty. it's that he is understandable and he makes us feel familiarity. he is not stars or galaxies, he is not here to be unknown and discovered. hyunjin wants to be heard and seen. he is here to be remembered and felt; the young scribbles on the rusty paint of your old home, the broken eye of your worn teddy bear that has rolled to the corner of your old room, the smell of your mother's shampoo after you left to be an adult for too long. it takes some time for you recognize, but they are not to be learned but to be remembered and felt.

tl;dr hyunjin is not the ethereal space. he is not stars and moon and sun. he is nothing out of touch. he is home. just home. a home that we have always had, a home that we can always go back to.

anyway, enough about that (although there seem to never be enough for hyunjin!). i never really thought my characters are anything special. for now, i think i am priding myself in my world-building and plot ideas (〃ﾟ3ﾟ〃) but thank you for liking my characters! they are always, somehow, a part of me. who i want to be, who i am, who i hated, who i wanted to have around, who i disliked—they are all parts of me, and i hold them to my heart dearly (most of them, at least). most of the traits i have are real-life human traits found in people around me, so i won't be surprised if you find them realistic and in-depth!

tenderness is a theme prevalent in my work, i believe? maybe i tend to overload them in hyunjin's, though (˚ᗜ˚*) and i also think the tenderness is different depending on who i am writing for. it can be soft and hearty for one person, but playful and nostalgic for another. they range differently depending on how i feel in real life about the idol, i suppose? (this is the part where i craft a character based on the idol, instead of the other way around, which is 98% of the case haha)

but yeah. i think... i think tenderness is very important. i think being able to be gentle with faulty people is very important, even though they hurt you. there is greatness in standing up to people immediately, of course, but sometimes when you see past the surface of the fault and recognize the guilt in it, i find it even greater to have heart. i value it because i, personally, need it; i don't have it a lot as my personality issues clashes with tenderness. i talk about this before as well—the importance of having people who are willing to allow kindness despite evil.

i just love loving, that is all. i love the tenderness of having dinner with someone, i love the softness in sharing a bed with someone, i love the gentleness in being taught something by my mother who told me the knowledge is taught to her by my father when they were young (i might... write something for this... maybe...). i say the same thing over and over again, but consider me head over heels and someone who is unable to let go.

[lucacangettathisass]

how the light gets in (ch. 8)

SUMMARY: After your home is ransacked by a group of strange men, you and your cousin are taken in by a group of outlaws. And that’s when the trouble really starts.

PAIRINGS: John Marston x Fem!Reader, Arthur Morgan x Fem!Reader

ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR, FIVE, SIX, SEVEN

TAGGING: @mountainhymn if you would like to be added to the tag list just lmk!

NOTES: so sorry for the slow update! ive been doing some full on hours at work (my manager literally told me that im doing full time hours despite being part time lmao rip) so that’s been leaving me a little drained lmao but hey at least we got there!

more mentions of low self esteem, those are gonna be a lot more prevalent from here on out actually.

on another note, i’ve been wondering if i should rewrite this as an oc fic rather than a reader one. thoughts? i might not even do it, but im curious to hear what you guys think.

anyways, hope you all enjoy! and dont forget, likes are nice but reblogs are what motivate creators the most!

p.s. pls check out waking up slow by mountainhymn!!!! it is so wonderful im still crying

“Well, it really all started with my momma.” You felt yourself begin to fidget and made an effort to stand completely still. “She got a job working for a wealthy Russian widow, Mrs Zamolodchikova.”

Mr Morgan let out a low whistle. “Now that’s a name.”

You couldn’t help but smile. “A lot of Russian names are like that. As I was saying, she hired my momma to be a maid when I was still very young. Mrs Zamolodchikova treated us very well, we even lived in a little cottage she had on her land.”

Despite all the years that had passed, you still thought of that cottage fondly. It had been small and not impressive by any means, but it had been your home for most of your childhood. You had a lot of good memories of it.

“I...I lost my momma when I was seven.” Even now, twelve years later, it hurt to say. Your mother had been your whole world, everything began and ended with her, and it had never once occurred to you when you were a child, that you would one day have to face the world without her. She loved you too much to do that to you. And then it happened anyway.

You had never experienced a heart break like it before, or since.

“I’m very sorry to hear that.” Mr Matthews said gently.

“It’s alright.” You assured him, trying to speak around the lump that always formed in your throat whenever you thought about losing your mother. “She had been ill for as long as I could remember, it was only a matter of time.”

“I imagine your aunt and uncle took you in?”

“They wanted to, but Mrs Zamolodchikova stepped in. She said that she saw it as her Christian duty to take me in as a ward, and that’s what I became.” It had stunned you at the time to learn that Mrs Zamolodchikova cared for you that much. You would always be grateful for her kindness, it had changed your life. “She had no children of her own, so I think she wanted me to fill that gap.”

“That was very kind of her.” Mr Matthews sounded surprised, and you supposed that it made sense. You couldn’t imagine that he had come across many people willing to take in the child of an employee, particularly among the rich. You certainly had never seen such a thing in your time among them.

You nodded in agreement. “She taught me etiquette and how to behave in upper class circles, and as I got older I became her companion. That was how I met Mr Cornwall.”

A spark appeared in Mr Van Der Linde’s eyes, and you knew that you really had his full interest now. “How did that come about?”

“He was looking for investors in his business, he was just starting out you see, and he needed some capital.”

“So he went to Mrs Zamolodchikova?” Mr Van Der Linde asked. “She must’ve been rather rich.”

“Exceedingly so.” You said. “Her family is very old Russian money, and when she came to America with her husband, her wealth only grew, even after he died. I imagine Mr Cornwall thought that if he could convince her to invest, he would have an easy time of building his empire.”

“Did he?” Mr Van Der Linde’s eyes sparkled with a kind of devious curiosity, the kind most often found in children. “Convince her to invest that is.”

“I’m afraid not. Mrs Zamolodchikova found him rather...disagreeable.” A part of you still cringed on the inside just thinking about that meeting. It had started off well, and Mr Cornwall had certainly been polite enough, but once his true character came out, it all started to go downhill rather rapidly.

“In what way?”

You hesitated slightly. “Well, I mean, one doesn’t wish to disparage others when they don’t have the opportunity to defend themselves.”

A chuckle came from Mr Van Der Linde, and you even saw a corner of Mr Morgan’s mouth twitch.

“We just want your honest opinion, that’s all.” Mr Matthews assured you. “No need to be disparaging.”

You paused, trying to think of the right way to phrase it. “Mr Cornwall...well, Mrs Zamolodchikova and I found him to be rather...brusque and arrogant. When Mrs Zamolodchikova turned down his request, he got rather upset and he seemed to take it as a personal affront.”

“She must’ve grown to regret that.” Mr Van Der Linde mused.

“Not at all. Mrs Zamolodchikova was happy for him of course, but she was also happy she rejected him. She said she couldn’t imagine being in business with someone so...tasteless.”

“Tasteless in what way?” Mr Matthews asked.

“Well he was...very new money.” When you saw the looks of confusion on the mens’ faces, you tried to think of a better way to phrase it. “He was something of a show off, and a little gaudy. He wore a lot of gold, I imagine to try and impress, but it came off as vain and rather insecure. Mrs Zamolodchikova was very critical of that kind of thing, and when she saw how self aggrandizing he became after his success, she grew to dislike him even more.”

Mr Van Der Linde nodded slowly, and you could almost see the wheels turning in his head. “It sounds like you’ve lead a rather interesting life.”

“I suppose you could say that.” Your eyes roamed over the two older men again. “I imagine that wasn’t the kind of information you wanted, my apologies Mr Van Der Linde.”

Despite your fears, the black haired man smiled and waved a hand. “It’s fine Miss [Last name]. I was just curious, that’s all. Javier, why don’t you walk her back to where she’s staying?”

“Sure thing boss.”

You turned to leave with Mr Escuella, but you hesitated just as he put a hand on the door knob. “Wait.” All eyes were back on you, and you felt yourself flush, but you felt that you needed to get this out. “I just-I just wanted to add that Mr Cornwall is a very powerful man, and in my opinion, and in the opinion of mutual acquaintances that he and I share, he is lead more by pride and ego than wisdom. He doesn’t take insults lightly and can be rather harsh.” You were very careful and deliberate with your words, not wanting to seem like you knew better, but still wanting to convey your feelings of apprehension.

Mr Van Der Linde raised an eyebrow, and you got the feeling that he understood what you were trying to say. “Duly noted Miss.”

You nodded, and turned back to Mr Escuella, this time actually following him outside.

“You must’ve lived a pretty good life for a while.”

You shrugged and felt yourself blush heavily. “I suppose.” It always somewhat embarrassed you, knowing how different your life had been from other people, especially those who were born into the same class as yourself. “I honestly just think I got lucky.” You looked down at your feet. “Don’t feel so lucky now though.”

A heavy silence hung between you two, and you had to bite the inside of your cheeks to stop yourself from crying.

“Sorry.” You said softly. “I’m sure you don’t want to hear about my woes.”

“It’s ok.” Mr Escuella assured you, his voice kind again. “Considering everything you’ve been through, I’d say you have a right to let your feelings out.”

You looked at Mr Escuella in surprise. You hadn’t really thought about it like that. “You’re very kind.” You said sincerely. “Sadie might not think so but I certainly do.”

That brought a bright smile to Mr Escuella’s face, which made you smile in turn. You always enjoyed making people smile, it made you feel good, and you felt that it proved that you were useful and worth something for once.

“You’re a sweet kid.” Mr Escuella’s eyes were shining, although you couldn’t hazard a guess as to why. “Don’t let anyone beat that out of you, ok?”

“I-Ok.” You weren’t sure how else you should respond, being so unused to compliments from strangers. You watched as he held the door to the house with the other women open. “Are you not coming in?”

“Nah.” He smiled. “You stay warm ok?”

“Of course, and you as well Mr Escuella.” You went inside, and no sooner was the door closed that you were practically swarmed by Miss Jones, Miss Gaskill, and Miss Jackson.

“What did they want?”

“You weren’t gone for very long, did everything go alright?”

“Are you allowed to say?”

You felt yourself flush as you tried to keep track of who was asking which question. “It was nothing special.” You said. “They just wanted to know how I knew Mr Cornwall.”

Of course they all also wanted to know, and so you told them what you had told Mr Van Der Linde, Mr Matthews, Mr Morgan, and Mr Escuella-omitting your warning at the end.

Much like the men, they were stunned to hear your story.

“So you grew up pretty well to do.” Miss Jones said, in a tone that sounded impressed and envious.

“I-Well, yes, I suppose.” The embarrassment from earlier had returned. “I was extremely privileged.”

“What was it like?” Miss Gaskill asked, sounding wistful. “Being in that world?”

You paused, trying to think of a good way to describe it.

“When I was a little girl, it was dazzling.” You confessed. “All those men and women in their finery...it looked like an entirely different world. Like a fairy tale.”

“Oh yeah?” Miss Jackson raised a brow. “Meet any prince charmings?”

You laughed. “I met some well to do gentlemen if that’s what you mean.”

“I think she means suitors.” Miss Gaskill said with a giggle, and an eager look on her face. “Well, did you?”

“Oh!” A scorching heat unlike any of the others from before overcame you, and you felt your throat dry up. “I-Well-no.” You stammered, looking askance out of embarrassment.

“Really?”

You looked up and saw Miss Roberts looking at you with surprise. “You mean none of them tried to…” She trailed off, leaving you to fill in the blank.

“Not at all.” You said, your flush worsening. “After all, I was just a maid’s daughter.”

And therein lies the rub.

No matter how much you learned or how you dressed or how you behaved, everyone knew that you were just the daughter of a maid who Mrs Zamolodchikova had taken pity on. Most of them had been polite enough, but that boundary had always been there, and always would be. You had grown accustomed to it, the way one would grow accustomed to a permanent limp. And it left you with what you imagined would be the same level of alienation. It was one of the many unfortunate side effects of being born as yourself, and one you had learned how to deal and navigate the world with.

But it would always be a fairy tale to you. Beautiful, grand, never within your reach no matter how well you knew it. And you would always be that little girl that chased after it with every breath in her chest.

[luthorao3]

I, K, S, T, X, Z

I: Do you have a guilty pleasure in fic (reading or writing)?

this is actually a hard one, because i don’t generally feel guilty about fic in any way shape or form, however… when it is written exceptionally well, damaged relationships with no hope of recovery can be so rewarding to read about. you know what i mean? those really well written smut fic where it’s so fucked up but like…… wow. that’s probably my only guilty pleasure. 

K: What��s the angstiest idea you’ve ever come up with?

gosh…. all of flame that came for me? i don’t think i’ve ever written anything that’s dealt with the harder subject matters in this fic, and i know i only really briefly grazed over them - i don’t think i could delve any further into them without upsetting myself. 

S: Any fandom tropes you can’t resist?

im a sucker for tropes in general. big fan of The Tropes here. 

T: Any fandom tropes you can’t stand?

i’ve been thinking about this for a lil while now and…. honestly, anyone can do tropes really, really well, even the worst ones, and still make them into beautiful, original pieces of writing. i suppose im generally not a fan of arranged marriage (although– one of my favourite fics is exactly this, just treated very, very well). anything that borders on dub-con or further, i’m not really a fan.

X: A character you enjoy making suffer.

answered! i don’t! :) 

Z: Major character death–do you ever write/read it? Is there a character whose death you can’t tolerate?

i have written this in the past (way in the past, old fandoms and old accounts), but it’s not something i particularly enjoy to read or write. fanfiction is like… self-care? i can’t think of anything worse than reading through an angsty multi-chapter only for them not to make it in the end. 

i DO however very much enjoy ghost stories, especially when they’re not treated as traditional ghost stories. falling in love with a ghost? i’m here for it. reuniting in the afterlife? that’s my jam. two fics in particular come to mind (mass effect, ouat) that go into life after death, the afterlife (mass effect), and then a guardian angel type spirit (ouat) that both absolutely destroyed me emotionally, they’re two of my favourite pieces of fanfiction ever, and they’re both so rewarding to read even if there is a very prevalent level of angst throughout both. 

(realised i totally missed the end of this question - im not sure there’s any character in particular. i would like to keep them all alive in general.)

[fanfic ask game] [ask me things]

[dreamyarcana]

Injured!MC x Asra

THis hELL OF A PIECE TOOK ME FOREVER TO COMPLETE AROUND SCHOOL

if it were up to me, writing shitty fanfiction about my fictional husbands is what i would do for the rest of my life, sometimes. because high school sucks xD and the arcana and midnight cinderella (another fantastic dating sim!) are why im still existing and its been less than a month since school starts ._.

honestly, it think it’s actually one of my better works but hey XD

anywho, again, i do try to write from they/them nb perspective but sometimes it does come across as she/her perspective unintentionally.

If you see any mistakes or have suggestions for other fics, please do suggest :) I’m trying to learn to write for Julian, but I’m not sure I’m quite there yet. Maybe soon! Please enjoy haha

dedicated to @rosehardt​ for their sweet comment on my last Asra fic <3

Gasping, I stopped to rest in a dark alleyway. My heaving breaths were noisy despite my attempts to quiet them. I prayed that my pursuer will go away and leave me the hell alone. For the first time, I gingerly took a peek at the wound made by the hooded figure's knife. It was rather severe; blood was seeping all over, completely soaking my linen shirt. The captor had cut my just below my chest down to my waist. "How did I get here?" I moaned in frustration. But I knew perfectly how I had gotten here.

I had been taking a night stroll, thinking about my master, the Arcana, and his familiar. It was a fantastic night - the kind of night where you could see millions of stars wherever you went. My favorite shawl concealed my hair and to an extent, my face. The soft material looked like it could've been made from the same sky that blanketed the earth. The rest of my outfit was selected around it. Even at night, the marketplace was lively and bright. Venders offered me various goods from sweet fruits to homemade crafts. I shook my head politely before making my way past a mysterious black tent. Suddenly, someone grabbed my wrist and yanked me hard into the tent. I gasped and yelped in surprise but another hand covered my mouth. "So you're Asra’s famous apprentice everyone talks about?" sneered a low voice. "Maybe you've should've foreseen this happening to you." I attempted to get away, tried to pull away, but the grip just tightened on me. I could feel my shirt being lifted and resisted more, trying to yank myself out of the hand. Something sharp was being traced against my skin. Panic rose in my throat and I cried out in his hand. "Not so fast, young one." the figure admonished gently, as if I were a star pupil and my kidnapper was a kind teacher. I kicked and stomped on his feet as best as I could in the awkward position the person had me in. "Perhaps we should just get right into this." Anger was starting to leak into the voice. The knife pierced my skin swiftly and I couldn't do anything but struggle and cry out into the hand. In desperation, I tried to bit the hand as the kidnapper dug it in further. Swearing like a fiend, the hands released me and I shot out like a rocket, desperate to find the exit. I blasted it out of there and somehow ran behind an alleyway.

Wildly, I glanced around, trying to figure out the quickest way to my shop without being spotted by too many people. Slowly, but surely I forced myself to my home and released a sigh of relief as I locked the door behind me. I felt myself slide down to the ground while my vision grew out of focus fast. "(Y/N)?" Asra's soft, melodic voice called out. I couldn't summon any energy to answer as I sat there, panting and trying not to disturb my oozing wound. When I didn't respond, his light, graceful footsteps approached the door and although quiet, I heard his gasp of surprise. "You're hurt, oh no...please, no..." Asra muttered; this was the first time he sounded so distraught, but I could hardly focus on that. I tried to regain focus and blinked rapidly. "(Y/N), can you hear me?" Asra asked, worry in his voice. I nodded, or at least, I think I did. Gently, he helped me to my feet and lifted me bridal style in his arms. "Asra," I whispered, slightly dazed. "I'm here for you, (Y/N). You're safe now that I'm here to care for you." he reassured. I wrapped my arms around him and leaned in to smell his sweet scent. My eyes shut for a second from the throbbing that started to become prevalent. now that I was safe. 

Asra snatched a blanket on the way to the bed and placed me on it gently. Slowly, he peeled back the blood soaked shirt to reveal the mess of a wound. I watched his face anxiously, but he revealed nothing except concern. Without saying anything, he exited swiftly, probably to get something.

Soon after, he returned with some alcohol, bandages, and some kind of white kit. "Listen, (Y/N), this wound is extremely deep. I'm not much of a, well, doctor, but I do know some basics from previous... occasions." he told me softly, his eyes locking on to mine. "First, I have to clean the wound, which will hurt a lot, and then sew it up as best I can. The stitches won't hurt as much as the actually cleaning will. It’ll probably leave a scar." Asra frowned to himself and his inability to fix this problem. Meanwhile, his hand held mine and I squeezed weakly.

“Don’t worry about it,” I answered shakily, trying not to be a baby about the entire situation. Asra, likes always, could see through my mask and softened his gaze. 

“It’ll be okay.” He reached over and kissed my forehead, stroking my hair softly. “Can you drink some of this alcohol? It’ll numb some of the pain,” he added, looking at my shocked expression. I tried to sit up a bit to drink some and Asra lifted the small bottle to my lips. The taste was dry and stung my throat, but I drank anyways. 

“Do you think we could try to remove your shirt? It’ll be easier to work with the wound.” he explained after he set the bottle down. I blushed, despite the serious circumstances. 

“Uh, yeah, that’s fine.” I replied as casually as I could, breaking my gaze to him. Asra chuckled, which was a sweet sound to hear.

“You’re charming when you blush.” he murmured as he helped me get the blood soaked shirt off as well as the shawl wrapped around me still. I could feel the edges of my vision getting hazy.

“Okay, I’m going to clean it now. I’m sorry for the pain, but try to stay still. It’ll be over soon,” he promised when he returned out of nowhere with boiling water and a washcloth. My gaze drifted to his fluffy hair - it was like a sheep’s and I wanted nothing more to touch it. 

Suddenly, hot pain coursed through me and I cried out when it wouldn’t stop. Asra flinched when he heard my shouts and I tried to quiet myself to no avail.

“You’re doing great,” he reassured me with a calm voice. “Just a bit more.” More of the searing pain? I wasn’t sure if I could handle it a lot of it. 

It hit me again and I writhed around this time while Asra tried to keep me still.

“Please, I’m almost done, it’ll be okay, I’m sorry, (Y/N).” Asra’s voice had a note of panic in it and that caused me to hold still. I think we both sighed in relief when he said, “Okay, I’m finished cleaning, just relax for awhile.”

My mind dozed for a bit while Asra worked. I studied him while he worked on closing my wound up. His eyebrow was furrowed in concentration on what he was doing and his graceful hands worked calmly and steadily. Asra was right; I couldn’t feel any kind of pain or at least none that bothered me.

At some point, I reached out and awkwardly patted him because he took my hand and kissed it gently with his soft lips. I think I smiled.

Soon after he finished he put away the items and took away the blanket, which was now stained with my blood and he changed clothes to go to bed - or rather snuggle with me. I felt his warmth surrounding me cautiously and gently, and automatically nestled in his safe presence. It sounded like he was talking to me while I was half asleep, but also half talking to himself, for so many unknown reasons.

“(Y/N), your expression is peaceful and (beautiful/handsome) when resting. I hope you know how worried I was, you really scared me half to death when you first walked in... I can’t believe how much I’ve come to care for you, and part of me hopes to avenge whoever did this to you. I wish I could’ve protected you... I’m so sorry I had to cause you pain to make it better. Your screams were terrifying and I felt... horrible, like a monster for causing you such pain... Despite this, I still love you. I love you with all of my heart and I know that’ll never die. Sweet dreams, (Y/N).”

Sweet dreams, indeed, I would always have forever if I stayed in his arms.