#alternatives (because i thought they were “too hard”) i was like “english isnt THAT hard” and started working on my own reclist

[skelevision]

mm i wanna keep working on that jinriki bank slash string theocracy cover but ive started making usts by makign a midi first and i just got a plugin that can split notes so thats probably a better method than what i Was doing. but that means redoing all that hard work...... ive only done like 6 lines so far though so i shouldnt be so hung up on overhauling LMAO. there is Much More of the song i should be worried about

actually wait i do have like a few more lines than i did last time i showed this

[gwenguistics]

have you ever noticed how in English, the y-sound can only occur after a consonant if it’s also before /u/? or a schwa that used to be a /u/. 

like, the only time you get consonant-y-vowel is in words like pure, cure, mute, feud, beauty, etc. i know the historical reasons why those words are pronounced the way they are (it’s largely because of influence of early French on early English), but so where did the other sequences of consonant+y.... go? other languages can do that, and you get words like Spanish fiesta (which we borrowed as fee-esta by the way, not fyesta, because of this phenomenon), Korean hyeong, Japanese Kyōto, Old Norse Mjǫllnir, etc etc etc, you get the idea. we can have other vowels after y-sounds in words like “yes”, “yikes”, “yonder”, and “yam”, but English does not seem to allow other consonants to be placed at the beginning of those words. “myes”, “byikes”, “pyonder”, and “kyam” are not allowed. 

now, those y-sounds in the those words in those other languages derive from different sources, and actually all of those words can be traced back etymologically to not having a y-sound in those spots. fiesta arises from Latin festa via Spanish’s breaking of stressed e and o into ie and ue respectively. hyeong and kyōto are Korean and Japanese borrowings of words from Middle Chinese, in this case MC hˠwiæŋ and kˠiæŋ(tuo) respectively, both of which have an i-sound sort of as a lead-in to the nucleus vowel, but aren’t strictly speaking reconstructed as having been y-sounds. and besides, reconstructions of Old Chinese apparently say that those two words originally had r-sounds in those places, and changes to consonant clusters and the vowel are what produced the y-like sounds which were in the words at the times they were borrowed into Korean and Japanese. Old Norse Mjǫllnir is apparently from Proto-Germanic meldunaz, so this is another instance of an e breaking into a y+vowel combination. the English words pure, cure, cube, etc get their y-sounds from early English speakers rendering the French u-sound into English, so the French u (which is pronounced like saying “eeeee” but with your lips rounded) was borrowed as “yu”, which is a close enough approximation. 

so, i wonder why this is. y is a semivowel, a sound that is somewhere between consonant and vowel, and so is w. but, w actually does appear in a lot of root words in English, and didnt arise from changes to a vowel or consonant... it has always been in those positions for as far back in time as linguists can reconstruct. words like “two” (which isnt pronounced with a w now, but it used to be pronounced with a w and then a long o-sound, and the w still surfaces in related words like “twice” and “twenty”), “dwell”, “swing”, etc still have a consonant-w-vowel sequence that is thought to have been there in Proto-Indo-European too. 

i imagine it’s because y-sounds are extremely prone to affecting sounds around them, so when they arise in a language, they may not last very long, though you’ll see traces of their presence afterwards. whether it involves palatalizing the preceding consonant, fronting the following vowel, or anything like that, they change the sounds around them and then just sometimes.... vanish. sometimes they change the sounds around them so much that including a y-sound there is sort of unnecessary afterwords, like if the sequence “kyeh” would have the k change to a ch-sound in front of the y and the short e (like in “beg”) change to a short i (like in “big”) because of the y right before it, the resulting word “chyih”... doesnt need the y-sound, right? isn’t that kind of hard to say? chyih? it would probably come out as “chih” much more naturally. alternatively, the reason w-sounds stick around longer (though they also often change and alter the sounds around them, and often disappear too, but seemingly a bit less commonly) might just be because rounding your lips is much more distinctive, and since it doesnt involve your tongue much at all, it’s less likely to completely alter the way a word is said the same way that y-sounds do. w’s are like instagram filters you can slap onto a word to color it sometimes lol. 

hmm i dont really have a point to this, i’m just kinda.. observing. so um, i guess that’s the end of my infodump. thanks lol

[argumentl]

The Freedom of Expression - Ep 5, Quarantining of infected people in the Olympic village?

Note: *This episode was recorded in March 2020*

Hi, This is Dir en grey's Kaoru, starting another installment of The Freedom of Expression. I've revived this show on youtube, from when we did it on the radio station InterFM.

J, T: Thank you so much.

K: So, Joe san, Tasai san, we are here again, as a continuation from last time where we were talking about the corona virus....Well, how do we think things will go from now on?

J: Yes, well, if you ask reporters and such, despite the counter measures being a bit muddled, it isn't really taking hold in Japan, therefore, I really think the number of infections will start to drop. I think we'll definitely be coming to the end of this before long. No matter what, you see an exponential increase at some point, and when that happens, the absolute number of infections increases. But at the present moment, that is kind of leveling out, so there is the view that if we stick to this path until the end, the number of infections will eventuall drop. However, like you said Kaoru, even if this comes to an end, will the economy quickly revover? You know, if people get used to this new lifestyle, we'll have quite a conservative, sensitive situation. Whats it going to be like if people continue trying to avoid close contact with others? I think thats the scariest thing. And then, what about the Olympics, will it go ahead or won't it? Well, thats for Tokyo Sports right? After all your name is 'Tokyo Sports' newspaper.

T: No, no, no....but they'll do it won't they? What do you think?

K: What exactly is Tokyo Sports' view?

T: Well, we had a staff meeting recently, and we generally thought there is an atmosphere that it will go ahead.

J: Yeah, there is no option NOT to go ahead with it, but there is the option of postponing it?

T: Well, yes.

J: It could be an option.

T: I don't really think it will be postponed though.

J: One interesting thing I've heard after talking to journalists and such, is that as for the timing of the olympics, Japan can't really decide that at all. In other words, it fits with America's schedule. It fits during the time that America's sports are off seaon. It doesn't really matter to the hosting nation. So it can be postponed if America says thats ok. If thats not the case, honestly, its less a problem of Japan's corona situation, but from the American side, the issue of the huge investment in broadcasting rights. So I've a feeling this issue will be cleared up over there.

T: If it came to that, it (the olympics), will probably go ahead right?

J: I think so yes. No matter what Japan's government or the Olympic committee says, if the one with the strongest power (America) says they want to do it, then we'll have to do it, I feel.

K: But this virus mutates doesn't it?

J,.T: Yes, thats right.

K: If that happened, and things worsened, it would be terrible, wouldn't it?

J: Yes, well, at the moment a lot sporting areas, including the olympics, are thinking about spectator-less games etc.. Well, anyway, there is this problem about what to do about the virus, what to do about the olympics but I've heard that Tokyo Sports put out an article relating to the olympics and corona?

T:  Ah, yes thats right. Well, we wrote an article about how people infected with coronavirus, could be isolated in the the olympic village.

J: Thats ??? *1

T: But, isnt it the best place? No one is using it...

K: Did they already finish building it?

T: Yes, its finished.

J: Has there been any response from the government about that?

T: Nah, I don't think the government pays much attention to what Tokyo Sports says. *the others laugh loudly*

J: I wonder if any people in the government actually read Tokyo Sports?

T: Oh, a lot of them do, but they think because we are Tokyo Sports, they can ignore what we say. *the others laugh* But, there will be about 18,000 people at the olympics, so for now thats enough space, right?

J: Yes, its enough

T: So people can be properly isolated..

J: and its all set up already..

T: and then if you sterilize it properly, its still really reasonable to use. But I don't think the government will like the idea.

Kami: They sold the land for a really cheap price didn't they?

T: Yes, well...yes.

Kami: For about a tenth of the normal price?

T: Im not so sure about the details.

Kami: Shouldn't it be ok? If they sold it that cheaply? It should be ok, right? *T laughs*

J: Well, thats right. But I think this is a very reasonable suggestion from Tokyo Sports, its quite unlike you guys *K laughs*

T: Yeah, we speak sense occasionally...

J: Even though you usually only write absurd or unlikely stuff, this time its a very reasonable suggestion.

T: We get serious in times of crisis.

J: Oh, is that so? I see.

T: So, after the olympics, they plan to sell of the olympic village as regular apartments. In that case, the value will fall, right? If they have been previously used for corona patients?

J: Oh, is that it?

T: So thats an idea too.

J: I see.

Kami: Its about 30 mins from the station isn't it? So its great for isolating, right?

J: Well, yes, thats true.

Kami: Because its far away...Its perfect really.

J: It is perfect, yeh. It has all the requirements.

Kami: And there's a lot of remaining land around there, right?

T: Yeah, there is.

Kami: If you stop cars and have a bus instead or something, you could build loads of hospitals/sick bays.

T: I think thats a good idea.

J: Me too.

Kami: It would be really effective.

J: Well, testing is a problem at the moment, the number of tests..well, you can't get tested at the moment.

T: Thats right.

K: Some countries are doing drive-thru testing aren't they?

J: Yes. I can't help feeling Japan's approach is a bit muddled.

K: Hmm, but the number of people dying is under control right?

J: Right, yes.

T: Well, Japan's insurace system works really well, we are kind of blessed, medically speaking.  But in America, Tamiflu or such costs 25,000 yen.

J: Thats right.

T: So in America, theres people who want to go to hospital, but can't.

J: The cost of hospitals over there is really tough! So if you look at it from that perspective, it might be ok here....Still, the time for the Olympic judges to decide about a postponment is gradually nearing...I feel like its gonna be 'No more waiting!'.

Kami: But, no matter what happens, the olympics probably won't be postponed, right?

J: Yeh, I don't think it will be postponed.

Kami: If they push ahead with it, the athletes will come won't they?

J: Yep

Kami: Professional soccer players and other really rich athletes won't come though. So it will only be athletes who really place value on getting the gold medal, they'll risk catching corona for it, so i think it can be done. Spectators won't come though.

J: Well, there will be fewer spectators, yes. But if you do it in the Autumn, America's professional athletes won't be able to take part and America's medal count will decrease, that will be one problem. If America's medal count decreases, American TV ratings will fall, and if you think about that, it makes me think they will push to go ahead with it in the summer.

T: It looks like the golf player Dustin Johnson and other top players have given up on the olympics.

J: Oh right..

T: Its been talked about that (Tiger)Woods could come instead. Woods would be more popular maybe?

J: Is he ok with it?

T: I wonder if he is? *laughing*

K: We don't even know whether he's ok with it or not.

J: I want to know why he would come.

K: Well, yeh, there are gonna be athletes who don't want to come, right?

J: Oh yeh, there will be, though its strange to talk about. Lots of people cancelled thier trips to Japan with the radiation problem after 3/11 (Great Eastern Japan earthquake and tsunami), so when you think about that...the information coming to Japan, and the information coming to the English speaking world is probably a lot different. The media in Japan works in a very local way, but overseas, they have a lot more channels, and alternative media is really taking off. They have info from various sources, so i think there may be some athletes looking at this and deciding not to come.

K: Asian people are facing a bit of discrimination over there too, aren't they?

J: Yes, thats right.

T: Oh, yeah.

K: Even us, when we were in Europe recently, we were stared at a lot for wearing masks.

T: Really?

K: When we went into a bakery, the bread was all laid out like usual, but they were so annoyed at us.

J: Really? Wow! They treated you as if you were infected?

K: Yes, yes. We were only taking prevention measures. But they don't do that over there do they?

J: They don't.

T: Yeh, it seems like they don't.

K: Well, i don't know about now.

J: So, theres also this problem of discrimination developing now. Its possible that chaos might happen, doing the Olympis in this situation. Thats also another perspective. If someone coughs in the stadium or something, trouble might break out.

T: Thats it.

J: Its a little worrying.

Kami: I don't think there will be any spectators though.

J: Well, maybe thats right.

Kami: They havn't said 'no spectators', but there will be hardly anyone there.

K: Yeh, people won't come.

Kami: Not going ahead with the olympics would probably result in less deficit.

J: Perhaps. But its gonna be really hard for those businesses that rely on the crowds.

Kami: Yeh, bars and such.

T: Bars, and the general night life industry that has a lot of customers who are visiting from overseas.

J: There are a lot of stores near the venues who are feeling like this right now, they've already installed big TVs in advance, or prepared English menus and stuff. They were expecting these customers. So its very painful for the people who have invested, to suddenly lose that. Well, anyway, the night life is really quiet at the moment. Was it last week? I went for drinks at Keisei Tateishi.

T: Oh, cheap bars right?

J: Keisei Tateishi is, yeh, cheap bars. Theres loads of popular places there like nabe, or sushi places, its full from mid-afternoon normally. But it was empty! I was shocked!

K: I went to see a friend's fashion exhibition near Shinbashi, but at night, it was packed!

J: Oh really?

K: They were saying, 'Don't take photos of me', they were trying to keep it a secret from thier company that they had been out drinking.

J: Really? *laughing* Well, a lot of companies are doing work from home now, its awkward if you get exposed going out drinking.

K,T: Yes, it is!

K: Well, we don't know when everything will be opened back up, but to everyone watching, please wash your hands, gargle, get good nutrition, boost your immunity..

T: *laughing* Its like a health show!

J: One thing I want to say is, the virus can't infect rock, and music.

K: Right

J: No mistake about that.

K: Ok, lets finish this installment here. See you again next time. Thank you very much.

*1 Couldn't catch this

[lalalizzy16fitness]

Halloween movies; most don’t survive. Don’t get caught; STAY, ALIVE!

Best time of the year, best time of year to die. Bet. We all know there can be only one (one that survives anyway), let’s make that you. If you’re like me, sometimes the best part is screaming at the screen “Look behind you!” or “Don’t touch that, idiot!” or my personal favorite, “DO YOU REALLY THINK THAT COULD KILL HIM!?” When you are on the outside looking in (although I personally feel I am an expert and would easily survive a 2000’s slasher film) it seems pretty simple to outsmart the killer/demon/thing that just wants horny teenagers to die. But when you’re being chased by a chainsaw connected to a 7ft tall behemoth wearing your friends face for a mask, there are certain things that may slip your mind. So, that being said, in the spirit of the spookiest time of year, here are some rules (you can tattoo them to your forearm for future reference if you are really worried) to guarantee you are the allocated single horny teenager that escapes (barely, and gravely injured), alive.

Listen To the Kid / Old Lady

The wisdom of children and the elderly is questioned more often than any other age group, so it makes sense that in horror movies they reveal the truth of the situation first (often within the first 15 minutes of the film). The child usually ends up being the protagonist or close to them, while the elderly usually act as a prophetic warning. Naturally, neither is heeded by the other characters, paying for it rather quickly. Stay a step ahead of the enemy; (children are stupid and eat glue) but if you are in a 90s horror film listen to the kid or the old lady.

Don’t Sneak Up On Your Friends

Horror movies are often populated with irritating (and expendable) characters that make it very hard to sympathize with them, and part of this is the obnoxious way in which they like to make their presence know. EVERY horror film has that scene where the friend suddenly slaps their hand on the jumpy pals shoulder, scaring the pee out of them. Who actually does that? Honestly? Then acts surprised that their friend jumps or screams. Monsters don’t like imitators.

ALWAYS ASSUME THE MONSTER ISNT DEAD!!!!!!!!!!!

Near the end of every horror movie, the remaining character(s) finally defeat the monster. They pat themselves on the back in sweet relief; all the while the audience knows (biting their nails, waiting for the jump scare), the monster is in fact (surprise!) NOT dead. It comes back to life for one last scare. The menacing monster rises back into the menacing frame menacingly. The characters are surprised, oh no! They are forced to continue fighting back, only to “kill” it once again (often times in the most gruesome way so far in the film). Many characters will go so far as to stick their face into the monsters and start poking it, just to assure it is finally back in whatever hell it came from. The monster is largely of course unharmed, a simple headshot would end it all (unless you are dealing with a demon or an apparition upon which a ritual of some sort is appropriate), but for some unexplained teenage horny reason the assumption is its dead. They either leave STAT. Or the most annoying ones of all slump to the ground, gasping for air while the monster rises (menacingly) in the background.

Don’t Do Drugs

Every horror movie has drug users. Much like sex, you horny degenerate fucks. Your fate is already sealed. To your credit you stick to the easier stuff, alcohol and marijuana, but killers are straight edge and don’t stand for that shit in their good Christian neighborhoods.

Don’t Be the Jerk

The one constant in horror is that the “jerk” is a death sentence. There’s nothing worse than the guy who refuses to cooperate with everyone else during times of crisis, thus the horror gods smite him of his life, and the audience is disappointed but not surprised. The moral of the story in this bloody teaching moment is to be nice kids! Be a team player!

Don’t Have Sex

Slasher films from the 70s onward firmly established that pointy boobs and having sex while a maniac is on the loose will kill you. For whatever reason (I suspect sexual frustration), monsters hate walking in on two unmarried teens going at it. Also, why do the teens INSIST on banging in the strangest places? (Forests, barns, and even morgues. What the fuck.) Practically begging for the killer to intervene. Frankly, I don’t blame him. If I was camping with my wife and kids and some teens decided to bang nearby within earshot of my toddlers, I might kill them. If they weren’t in a horror film, and this was real life, they might just get killed anyway, by some… deranged drifter or some shit. More recent horror films however are bending this rule, abstinence does NOT guarantee survival, but it still most certainly increases the odds.

Don’t Touch Anything Strange

I would say 50% of all horror movies situations wouldn’t happen if the characters were raised better and their mothers taught them to keep their hands to themselves. Example: Dark, decrepit, old, basements and attics suddenly become the touching tanks at an aquarium. Then upon finding an ancient looking book filled with ritualistic notes they can’t decipher but notes at the bottom in English they CAN read that say something along the lines of, “DO NOT READ OR REPEAT, DO NOT SAY OUT LOUD, ALL MY FRIENDS ARE DEAD, YOUR EYES WILL FALL OUT, YOUR TEETH WILL TURN TO LIQUID, YOU WILL BE CRUCIFIED, YOU WILL BE BURNED ALIVE, EVERY T.V. SHOW YOU DECIDE TO START WATCHING WILL HAVE SPOILERS IN SKY WRITING ABOVE YOUR HOME FROM NOW ON!” They read it in a horny teenager accent, and the horrible demon is unleashed.

Don’t Go Alone

Man does not survive alone, characters in horror films go against this logic (I literally cannot think of ONE horror flick where they don’t), and split up when staying together is safer. Insane killers, zombies or some type of monster your odds of survival rise substantially when you have the help of other horny teenagers to rely on. The alternate universe where horror movies take place it is the better idea to go it alone to investigate the noise you heard in the creepy forest. The result? Being pinned to a tree by something sharp and pointy through your stomach (or head depending on the stage of the film).

Don’t Take Vacations in Secluded Areas

The creepy secluded cabin in the woods the rich characters parents own. Classic. No cell reception, who would have thought? Murders took place in the basement years ago and my parents never told me? This is an outrage! The caller is coming from inside the house!? (Wait I thought there was no cell reception…?) Anyway, in the world of horror, secluded areas outside of modern civilization (it’s not like Jason Voorhees is a part of his homeowners association), is a breeding ground for demons, killers, and diseases. Take a vacation to Candyland. (But watch out for that Gloppy… I don’t trust that guy).

Pay Attention to Your Surroundings (If You Don’t Do This Already Maybe Take This as A Life Lesson)

The real reason and most realistic reason so, so many characters fall prey to their assailants is because they simply don’t pay attention to their surroundings, outside of investigating a sometimes very easily explained noise in the distance. The monster is watching them from the bushes 100ft away but nope, let’s play beer pong, other horny teens! Then BAM… the monsters right behind you and just like the dentist, it’s always too late. It’s almost comical. Pay attention homie.

Happy Halloween suckas’

[tumblunni]

Today's random mood is soft thoughts about my headcanon of McKraken being Squisker's adopted nephew before things went wrong

* Squisker was the very beloved mayor of the springdale yokai realm, which i am choosing to call Springdoom until we get a canon name, yes. He was 100% a good dude and Mckraken falsely accused him of the crimes that got him imprisoned away in the infinate inferno, in an attempt at a coup to take his power and begin his anti human warfare. But also i think itd be saddest if Mckraken did genuineky care for his uncle, and he'd just become so carried away in his obsession for revenge that he started getting paranoid that all his loved ones were plotting against him. He's probably haunted every day by what he did and after his redemption the first thing he did was fight his way thru the inferno to set right what he'd done wrong!

* They first met when Squisker was just idly visiting the human world and stumbled upon a baby yokai all curled up and scared in the wreckage of a beach destroyed by an oil spill. Originally he just wanted to help the kid get to the yokai world and find a new family, but then the lil guy called him "unca" and his heart(s) were totally melted! It kinda helped give the old man a reason to live again, during a very melancholy time of his life.

* Imagine babby mckraken sleeping in the sink cos he is just a smol squiddy and does not understand fancy society yet. "But why would you have a tiny pond thats not for sitting in!" Squisker introduces him to the concept of beds and he's initially very suspicious of this strange land rock. But then he bounces up and down on it and its just like waves! Its a magical sea land hybrid!!

* Various funny circumstances of squisker being this fancy politician man and trying to introduce a feral sea child to high society. Even funnier if the rules of yokai high society are wildly different to humans, like you have to hold every single fancy fork simultaneously in your tentacles! Possibly some cute moment where the kid's innocent 'but why' questions get squisker to realize he's being all stuffy and fancy when its not really necessary, and maybe itd be fun to loosen up and enjoy himself?

* Melancholy episode where babby mckraken keeps trying to adopt fishies from the human world and bring them home to protect them. Squisker has trouble explaining that mortals cant survive for long in the underworld, which would require first explaining to this poor kid what death is and that he's dead...

* maybe possibly one of those fish does come back as a yokai decades later when mckraken is all grown up, and pledges eternal loyalty to him for the kindness he showed as a child? And thats the backstory of that one fish boat boss dude everyone forgets.

* Headcanon of maybe mckraken's signature inspiriting power is 'colourlessness' or 'nothingness'? He can drain energy out of stuff with his weird hand mouths and it turns black and white. And perhaps for maximum angst the reason Mckraken himself is colourless is because that day his paranoia overtook him and he betrayed his closest family member, he used his own powers on himself to erase his emotions enough to be able to silence those doubts...

* Alternative headcanon is just that turning colourless is somethibg that naturally happens to yokai who lose all hope. Supported mostly just by the fact whisper is a notable white yokai who isnt part of The White Yokai, and also his backstory form had more colour and that backstory was really damn tragic...

* Oh and Squisker only attacks you in the infinate inferno because he's gone mad from rage and grief and just attacks everything indiscriminately. This is actually canon to his japanese medallium entry! (Though him being a good guy before being imprisoned and him being a father figure to mckraken is all speculation)

* so imagine a post redemption mckraken teaming up with you to try and recsue his uncle from the prison he put him in, ans its super depressing when he gets to squisker's cell and sees he's so far gone theyre gonna have to fight him. And maybe some sort of scene of him shielding you from one of squisker's attacks and getting heavily wounded, to prove how he really is legit about earning his redemption?and its this moment of kindness that makes squisker recognise this is his nephew, and come back to his senses. And i can just imagine mckraken weeping because what right do i have to be forgiven? You stupid old man, youre way too naive! Sobbing and hugging him and in his eyes squisker can see the sad young child he adopted so long ago, finally free of the chains of hatred he'd destroyed himself with. And then theyd go back together to the town and of course all the citizens woukd be like HOLY SHIT SQUISKER'S BACK, WE'RE SORRY WE DIDNT BELIEVE YOU, OH GOD MCKRAKEN TRIED TO TAKE OVER THE HUMAN WORLD and they immediately wanna elect him back to his old position. But Squisker insists on letting mckraken back into the town and giving him a second chance as his chairman, as well as his nephew. Claims its just because 'oh well ive been gone so long, i need someone who knows more about modern politics'. And probably works his ass off to clear his nephew's name and convince everyone that mckraken did what he did because of his love for this city, even if it was wrong it proves that he has a good heart and you should let him have a second chance! Aaand its hard to disagree i guess when the guy most affected by mckraken's takeover is also the one arguing for his redemption! The whole time mckraken is probably grumping about trying to deny it all and being like 'no put me in the prison its what i deserve NO I DO NOT HAVE ANY REDEEMING TRAITS DAMMIT'

* anyway i just like stories about broken families trying again, even if they cant be exactly how they used to be, as long as they both want to be a famuly again then they can be something new thats equally as good.

* also cute squid dad slice of life adventures is probably the most blessed sentence in the english language

* imagine babby mckraken always hiding shyly behind squisker cos he's never met any other yokai before and he doesnt know how to make friends with the other kids. But i dunno, maybe squisker is like 'youre such a bright young child you can help the others learn to swim!' or some other case of finding something he's good at and encouraging it as a way to bond with others. Oh maybe Mckraken's cooking skills started with learning to cook with his uncle and bringing snacks to school and all the other kids would be jealous? So he just sorta ended up with a tendancy to make food for people, which stuck around even when he turned evil. Still gotta open every evil meeting with sake and sushi! Gotta nag your minions that theyre not eating enough and they need to take care of their health! Gotta spend eighty hours decorating an elaborate layer cake as stress relief from dealing with that lousy human kid. Now grab a plate and sit yer asses down, you damn layabouts! Youre gonna cherish every mouthful, god dammit!! Also he totally wears lil oven mitts on all his tentacles.

This has been a miscellaneous ramble of squid redemptions, goodnight y'all

[ao3feed-snape]

the best of both worlds

read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/2x4u7Oh

by keiths_eyes

Of fucking course, they get sent on ANOTHER quest. And to do what? Protect a bunch of wizards? If they can do magic, why do they need us them there?

Then again.. They are learning at a school called Pigfarts, right? Yeah, now I can see why they'd want them there. - Alternatively titled 'im so fucking original'.

Words: 1148, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan, Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Categories: F/M, M/M

Characters: Leo Valdez, Nico di Angelo, Will Solace, Percy Jackson, Annabeth Chase, Thalia Grace, Jason Grace, Piper McLean, Calypso (mentioned), Hazel Levesque, Frank Zhang, Chiron, Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger, Draco Malfoy, Neville Longbottom, Luna Lovegood, Severus Snape, More characters to be added - Character

Relationships: Annabeth Chase/Percy Jackson, Jason Grace/Piper McLean, Nico di Angelo/Will Solace, Hazel Levesque/Frank Zhang, Calypso/Leo Valdez, Thalia Grace/Being Single.

Additional Tags: OH LOOK IT'S ANOTHER OF THESE CROSSOVERS, because o r i g i n a l i t y, i nearly spelt originality wrong that's a mood, Anyways, Hogwarts, m a g i c a l, nico is a smol boi-, no seriously he's like 5'3'', and will is real tall, like 6'4'' tall, the height difference is adorable and there will be piggy back rides., Percy is Confused, 'what is a slytherbip?', hazel has ptsd, Kinda, she doesn't wanna be a witch so she stays at camp, and so does frank, and leo, thalia is just bored and wants to find someone who will fight her, so she decides to tag along because the hunters are being b o r i n g, there's no prophecy because i suck at writing them, mcgonagall just wanted some helping hands when it came to the schools protection, oh boy did she make a mistake, the demigods are probably just gonna cause more problems minerva, what have you done, jk i love you queen, piper is protective of jason, and nico, and pretty much everyone - Freeform, Oh, and nico is super protective of piper, we love a nico/piper bromance, we also love mutual overprotective gay babies, aka solangelo, they're both scared the others gonna die, nico cant sleep without will, but will isnt at hogwarts, oh noes, nico and annabeth bromance, nico and everyone bromace, just kidding, only annabeth and piper have the privilege of being nicos bros, well leo has that privilege too but he's at camp, jason is more like an overprotective dad, and percy is percy so.., will isn't nico's bro but he sure is nico's hoe, just kidding omfg, i thought of that whilst typing and i couldnt resist, NO ONE IS A HOE OKAY, well..., some people might be-, shh lets not get into that, TBM IS NOT CANON KING, NEVER HAS BEEN NEVER WILL BE, JASON IS ALIVE AND THRIVING, BUT PIPER IS SCARED, BECAUSE NIGHTMARES, and shit, I EXPLAIN IT AT THE END OF THE FIRST CHAPTER FUCK OFF, also you might have noticed pretty much all of these tags are about the percy jackson side of things, that's because favouritism, no i just dont have anything to tag for the hp characters, Oh wait, except from, Harry Potter Being an Asshole, i love how that's a genuine tag, but seriously he's kinda an ass, ill give you a clue, h o m o p h o b i a, dont get mad tho it's not his fault the dursleys were homophobes, but it is his fault that he sTILL HASN'T REALIZED THAT GAYS ARE FUCKING BEAUTIFUL, any gays out there, you are beautiful, you dont need harry potter's validation, you have mine, and nico's, and every demigod ever's, and if you have that why the fuck do you need harry potter's, im gay too lmao, maybe that's why this story is so fucking G A Y, NO THEY'RE NOT ALL IN GRYFINDOR, THAT'S S T U P I D, story lines are hard, and that's depressing because i almost never finish a story, so please remind me to update this, also yes i know the title is the best, (of both worlds), stfu, THE FIRST CHAPTER S U C K S WHAT, piper and percy bromace because yes please, but nico and piper are number 1 bros, nico will defend that girl to the end of time, and she will do the same for him, what a cute bromance, but solangelo is an even cuter romance what-

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2x4u7Oh