#also. feeling ≠ presentation ≠ actual gender

[self-winding]

I'm actively uncomfortable with this trend toward "we expect everyone to put their pronouns in their bio/signature" for that reason. I'm someone who prefers to present in a gender neutral way but saying "I want they/them pronouns" feels like being pressured to explicitly out myself in a way I'm not comfortable with, because I don't even definitively identify as NB.

It's tempting to blame it on ally overreach or attempts to virtue signal, and that may be part of it, but also it feels like a natural and inevitable result of an increased focus on gendering people correctly and respecting pronoun preferences.

Like...some people actually do hate being misgendered that much (even if it's accidental). Some people do have strong pronoun preferences and feel hurt when someone calls them the wrong one (even by mistake) and those people probably appreciate these norms. But it makes other people's lives harder, because that's what a lot of stuff is like. People have different needs. Forward progress for one person can be regression for another.

I don't really know what the solution is.

it's complicated to suggest that sexism is worse now than it was 40 or 80 years ago, that's obviously nonsense, but gendered anxieties can still be high, or arguably even higher in the absence of old constraints.

[ayoharuko]

Love and Deepspace: Boyfriend Headcanons ♡

I really need to start writing more Zanye stuff considering his my type in so many ways, don't get me wrong but I love all of them, however. Zayne was the one who pulled me into the game and made me stay :3

Again, most of the headcanons may or may not be already canon in game. But do not worry, I do have originals I've thought off :3

Reader here is Gender Neutral (They/Them)

If you haven't seen Xavier's part its here!

Warning: Some Spoilers from his Myths and minor swearing.

Reminder: The character belongs to INFOLD/ its respective creators; this is all just fictional work so please try to not take these too seriously :)

♡ Now, we all know that our favorite Doctor loves sweets right? I feel like in his feel time, aka when he doesn't have work and takes a break from the hospital - he'll practice how to bake sweet goodies.

♡ Think about it! He knows how to cook well and his knife skills are exceptional, so he would definitely make baking as a stress relief and hobby.

♡ I imagine him making sweets to either give to the patients in the hospital, or maybe his coworkers too, once they finish another hard day.

♡ Obviously, you'll get most of the treats as your his special person but not only do you get most of the goods - you also get the first taste! He would also ask you for your honest opinion, now if your scared in telling him the truth; don't be. He encourages it so he can improve better in baking :)

♡ While on the convo of cooking and food - we also know that this man can cook very well, not only is the meal balanced but the presentation and taste is immaculate.

♡ Don't worry picky eaters, you won't even taste the veggies he put in the meal so you'll be safe and not gag (At least not from the food yk what I'm sayin-)

♡ Zayne will ALWAYS make time for you. No matter how busy he is, you will always be his top priority.

♡ You are literally the whole exact reason why he choose to be a cardiac surgeon/doctor after all.

♡ That also means he worries over you like a mother hen, sometimes he can be overbearing and too much on the scolding or doting whenever you get injured.

♡ So obviously, that leads to a few fights here and there but you understand that his intentions are all good.

♡ You are the passenger princess ✩

♡ Like. His car will always have snacks that you love, extra necessities, ties and your playlist is saved on his car too!

♡ On his day offs and you guys feel like hiking somewhere far, he would stock up his car filled with stuff that you usually use at your home as he wants you to be as comfortable as possible.

♡ He tries not to spoil you... he tried to put a limit on everything so you don't get your way but your just so fucking adorable and stupid sometimes that he can't resist giving in... kidding he loves you-

♡ Dates would consist of; cat cafes, hiking, going to the gym, trying out cafes, kitty cards but mostly he would prefer to spend time with you at your or his place :)

♡ Love languages would be Acts of service and Quality time.

♡ As mentioned, he would do chores and he'd cook for you. He also prioritizes you over anything, all his time belongs to you... it has always belonged to you.

♡ Despite telling you to always limit your sweets/desert intake, it apparently doesn't apply to him.

♡ You both would frequently visit the dentist as his teeth would hurt from the amount of sweets (and sugar.) he'd consume, one wonders how he hasn't gotten diabetes yet....

♡ Zayne knows that he can come off as aloof or cold so he thinks about the words he says to you before he actually speaks it. Which often saves you both from arguments a lot.

♡ He also makes a point to be honest whilst not hurting your feelings, you won't have to worry about him lying about how you look or the answers he'll give to your questions.

♡ The only thing he'd be dishonest about tho is when his the one in need of help. His so used to not accepting help that he lies that his evol doesn't hurt him; when clearly, it does.

♡ You'd have to be super plushy to make him care enough to take a break for his own well-being, how ironic for being a Doctor right? Well, his thankful that in times when he can't be the doctor, you make sure to step in as a Doctor just for him and him only.

♡ Zayne often has trips to the Arctic; and when he does, he would either take you with him (Which is rarely.) or make sure to update you with pictures of/or with Pie, the scenery and with your requests - his face as well. You both won't be able to video call all the time while his at the arctic because the signal would be weak so he takes pictures instead.

♡ When he does get back from his trip, expect gifts and tea from him. He'll also make sure to kiss you deeply as he definitely missed you a lot.

♡ Cats aren't really fond of him right? You would force take him to cat cafes all the time and try to establish a connection between him and one of the cats! There was only one cat that liked him enough tho- But thats a win for you!

♡ Since its been said that you both do go hiking sometimes, I believe you guys would do some camping as well.

♡ He would take you on a hiking journey up a cliff filled with pretty flowers and Mayne jasmines that he may or may not have planted himself and you both would set up camp there.

♡ He would grill some food, take out the sweets he baked back at his place and cuddle you under the starlight... wishing for this all to last forever.

♡ He gets nightmares right? When he does; all he wants to do is seek you out, but he often feels guilty as he knows you have your own problems... So you have to rely on your 'Zayne Senses' to know whether the nightmares haunt him or not.

♡ When it is haunting him; all you need to do is Lead him to the bed, tuck his head into your chest - just enough so that he can hear your heartbeat while you whisper promises that you're never gonna leave him.

♡ Zayne has learned how to be patient, yet for you? His Patience will be tested. Whether it's you on those week - long missions or you not calling or messaging.

♡ Zayne does skincare..... I firmly believe he has friends that are dermatologists and that they give him skincare products sometimes as a gift. He gives some of them to you too, if it has good benefits or if you just want it.

♡ If you both are living together and your schedules are in-sync; you both would do your skincare routines together.

♡ I believe that Zayne - not only takes care of his body health but also his face - and not in a beauty standard way but in a 'Good looks makes the patient more at ease and would likely trust him more typa way'

♡ However, in months where the hospital gets busy; he develops a little stubble under his chin. Sometimes its on purpose as he likes the way you shave it or the way you sit on his lap if yk yk...

♡ Nicknames that he gives you are so sweet like honey... the way he calls out to you with that sweet nickname he has given you, it instantly fills you with butterflies.

♡ I like to think he'd call you Honey, Sweetheart and My Love a lot... but when your asleep in the comforts of your shared bedroom; he'd whisper My heart and My Jasmine, just soft enough that you could barely hear whilst slipping away to dreamland.

♡ In conclusion, Zayne is just filled of Husband Material ᯓᡣ𐭩

♡ His not perfect by all means (Expect you think he is) but he will do everything in his power to make sure that you'll not only be satisfied but also comfortable.

I had a lot of fun writing Zayne's part! Considering that his my main after all heh.

I hope that you all enjoyed reading Zayne's part and let me know if ya'll want a NSFW Version of these headcanons :)

See you guys on my next post~!

Rafayel's Boyfriend Headcanons, check it out too!

Reblogs are appreciated and Feedback/Comments are always appreciated! :3

(Note: please don't copy and paste my works anywhere, and if you do see them on other platform please inform me.)

[sufferu]

I think Subaru just feels that if he was born a girl life would have been easier since he wouldn't have to deal with the expectations as the first son

The thing is: Subaru gets a genuine sense of joy out of dressing as a woman. His entire presentation undergoes this massive shift. He becomes more confident, he thinks he’s prettier, he’s outwardly flirtatious — and even when he’s not, uh, “in uniform,” he genuinely loves making dresses, and styling hair, and playing with makeup. It gets to the point where, before he learns ANYTHING else, Rem remarks that his sewing skills are “top notch” — simply because he enjoys it so much that it’s where he dedicated all his time. Plus, there are all these little hints in the LN about how he misses being a cute, androgynous child who could be easily mistaken for a girl (even saying that the years have not been kind to him, which is a very strange way for a totally cis guy to reference puberty), and how he cried when his hair was shaved off, and how he prides himself on the old nickname “Princess of the Ice.” And even when basically nobody wants him dressed as a woman in Arc 7, he keeps making excuses to not change clothes, and EVERYONE takes it that way. And also he refers to Natsumi as his ideal self. This isn’t just him doing what’s easiest: he LIKES this.

Plus like — if you want to talk about characters leaning into an opposite gendered persona due to feeling that they can’t live up to their gender’s expectations…Ferris is right there. And Ferris very specifically foils Subaru in ways that are incredibly pointed. Ferris presents as a girl specifically for Crusch’s sake, while every time Subaru dresses as Natsumi he’s like the only one who actually enjoys it (sans Emilia, who has been very pointedly left out of the reveal that Natsumi == Subaru, and who uniquely shows pretty much zero contempt for his crossdressing habit in the one failed loop side story where she does find out about it). Ferris has to go through this entire morning routine of “getting into character” every day in order to be Crusch’s Cute Little Ferri-chan, Subaru slips into Natsumi’s persona so easily that he has to actively fight AGAINST it. Ferris dresses almost solely in a singular outfit that’s basically his Ferri-chan uniform (complete with a collar and a bell), Subaru has this whole love for styling different outfits practically every time he dresses as Natsumi. Hell — symbolically, Ferris is a nickname for a very traditionally masculine given name (Felix) while Subaru has been referenced many times as having a name that is explicitly androgynous (the implications of this can be debated but as it is I’m pretty certain it was intentional on Tappei’s part). It’s like a Whole Thing.

(And also — we already Had the whole “Subaru struggling with the pressures of being Kenichi’s son” thing. It’s what the whole First Trial was about him overcoming. So why is Natsumi becoming More prevalent as the story goes on, if it’s just an extension of that?)

(And if it really IS an extension of that prior problem, why do we STILL very pointedly not know what happened that day when he got found out? With Subaru going out of his way to shadow it as “a very traumatic event for me that I have spent a significant amount of time processing and struggling to overcome” while never revealing what actually went down — it’s be kind of anticlimactic for something like that to be revealed as just — an extension of a conflict that already got revealed and resolved ages ago.)

[tellmeallaboutit]

A couple more thoughts on hells lore and why I found it contradictory. So there are two things. There is "this was written this way in the lore book" and there is "this is the way it was actually written".

In the lore book, it says that devils are genderless and the concept of gender does not apply to them. In some other older sources, it says 1/3 women, 1/3 men, and 1/3 "other" as was pointed out me today. It also says that devils have no familial relationships and do not feel love or affection or sexual attraction like mortals do. Let’s ignore the fact that there were many re-writes and editions for now; most of them follow the statement that gender is not relevant:

And then there is a way it was actually written, which is a completely different story and which has all the real world biases and power structures. Let's look at our beautiful she-devils aka devils presenting as female (for what reason, I wonder, if gender has no meaning?):

Baalphegor (consort to a more powerful male-presenting fiend), Glasya (daughter to a more powerful male-presenting fiend), Fierna (daughter), Baftis (consort), Lilith (consort), Cozbi (consort), Benzosia (consort). If no gender identity or familiar relationships, why... all of this? Why extremely pronounced gender dimorphism, why consortship, why nepotism, why, lol, heterosexuality in all of these consortships and note the type of heterosexuality: a female-looking devil subservient in hierarchy to a male-looking devil?

The exception sorta kinda is Zariel, but not quite because she is the protege of Asmodeus. He put her in her chair. There are a couple more that do not really disrupt the general pattern for me. There is no female arch-devil that is neither consort nor daughter nor granted power by a more powerful male.

Now you can argue whether it was bias of writers, or design (I am pretty sure it is the former, but what does it matter in the end?), but there is a very obvious contradiction in there for me.

So in a nutshell, the situation is like sitting in front of all-male board of directors that point to their company codex and saying our company is absolutely gender-unbiased, yes, all equal opportunity here, IT IS WRITTEN RIGHT THERE YOU BLIND MORTAL FUCK, in fact, our CHRO is a woman, yes, daughter of the CEO but she is like totally competent.

[diangelodork]

OKAY HERE IT IS FOLKS!!! - thank you to @chaotically-gay and @paraphwrites for giving me permission to quote them :3

(i couldn’t figure out how to get the actual word doc in here without doxxing my email and real name so sorry for the shit formatting lmao 🧍- also let’s hope my prof doesn’t decide to look through my page and figure out who wrote this 😟😟)

also, the end is a bit EUGH bc i was nearing the deadline so pls pls don’t judge me too harshly 😬

also also, it was meant to be 2-3 pages… it’s 5 🧍 LMAO DONT ASK ME TO WRITE ABT MY POOKIES IF YOU DONT EXPECT THIS LEVEL OF COMMITMENT 😭😭

Sociological Concepts as They Relate to Netflix’s “Dead Boy Detectives”

Netflix and Steve Yockey’s Dead Boy Detectives is a TV show that effectively addresses several different sociological concepts such as sexuality and gender, race and ethnicity, and deviance, in a very refreshing and enlightening way. This program was released for streaming on April 25th, 2024, and its popularity skyrocketed among adolescents and young adults in particular, as it follows two boys who are eternally 16, living their afterlives as phantasmic detectives with a strong and diverse supporting cast. One of these protagonists, Edwin Payne (played by George Rexstrew), was alive in the mid-1910s whereas the other, Charles Rowland (played by Jayden Revri), lived in the late 1980s, yet they navigate the modern world as they interact with people from the current times, such as the primary supporting cast, Crystal Palace (played by Kassius Nelson), and Niko Sasaki (played by Yuyu Kitamura). 

This show not only has a supernatural aspect to it, but it details stories of love, loss, and goodness despite the bad that must be faced. These themes hold significant relevance to the current times as we actively witness human rights lying up for debate. This show helps to teach people to remain kind in spite of the evils of the world.

One such example of the use of sociological concepts is the majority of well-represented queer characters. Many fans have reported feeling a sense of accuracy in the queer representation within this show far surpassing that of other queer content in media, as Tumblr user @diangelodork states, “this show exemplifies queerness through a queer light, and it’s very clear who the intended audience is for dbda” (dbda being a shortened form of Dead Boy Detectives commonly used by fans). Another user, @chaotically-gay, added to the sentiment within the same thread, writing, “i don’t really know how to explain it, but it’s like hs and rwrb have QUEER characters, while dbda has queer CHARACTERS,” when discussing this sense of representation in comparison to shows in the same vein of queer stories (hs standing for Netflix’s Heartstopper, and rwrb referencing Amazon Prime’s Red, White and Royal Blue, being a rather popular queer show and movie, respectively). It is very evident that the fanbase feels strongly about the importance of this show. It represents several different queer relationships, attractions, and identities whilst also never labeling a single one. One of the primary protagonists, Edwin Payne, has several different love interests, all of them being men, and he very clearly struggles with the implications of that, having been born in a time that oppressed him so heavily that his cause of death was, undoubtedly, his queer identity. Edwin was sacrificed to a demon for his lack of conformity and is even called an offensive term from the time period whilst being sacrificed, even though his queer identity is not given an explicit label. The Cat King (Lukas Gage) is another character that effectively plays with both his sexuality and gender presentation, acting as a symbol of desire within the show and wearing a skirt in nearly every scene he appears in. It is important to note that we see him acting as a symbol of lust and desire for Edwin, despite also having a romantic subtext with the female antagonist Esther Finch (Jenn Lyon). The difference here, once again, is the way that the show never forces stereotypes or conformity onto these characters, providing a more genuine and honest feel to the queerness exhibited within this show. 

It also has a rather large focus on feminism, with a significant portion of the characters being strong and willful women who have explicit motivations that drive their characters rather than being considered flat supporting characters to the protagonists. There are several subplots that follow themes of female justice, power, and vengeance, especially within the character of Crystal Palace. In one episode of this show, episode 6, “The Case of the Creeping Forest,” Crystal enlists the help of all of the women in her bloodline, tapping into the feminine and mystical powers of all those women she descends from. Furthermore, the primary antagonist, Esther’s power, comes from a deal she made with a Goddess of wronged women to take vengeance upon those who harmed her in her past, harming young girls in her desire to maintain her power. She is then defeated in the name of justice for the young girls she took advantage of, which tells us that the focus on feminism is prevalent in both the motivation for the antagonist as well as in the protagonists and their eventual success.

Another sociological concept addressed within this show is the implications and mistreatment of individuals based on their race and ethnicity. One of the most prevalent characters, Charles Rowland, died because of his decision to stand up for a person who was part of a racial minority group. He saw a boy of Pakistani heritage being berated and physically assaulted and stepped in, the bullies redirecting their abuse onto him. He eventually died from his injuries. He himself states that it “Just didn’t seem right. Letting that kid get beat on ‘cause he’s from Pakistan. I mean, I’m half-Indian. Why am I so different?” To which Edwin replies that this is “…a fair point. They were the same country back when [he] was alive.” In this exchange, we see the boys break down the barriers of ethnicity and showcase how unimportant a thing like ethnicity is in relation to a person’s character when it can change in a matter of decades. Despite their generational gap, they can still connect and understand the lack of importance of their backgrounds. Furthermore, of the main four characters that we see, Niko, Crystal, Charles, and Edwin, only one of these is a Caucasian person; although, like how they treat the sexual and gender identities of the characters, they never play into any racial stereotypes. Their ethnicities make a small impact on their characters here, too, never shying away from the fact that Niko was born and raised in Japan, that Charles is half-Indian, or that Crystal is Black, but it never affects the plot in a significant or archetypal way. They are very clearly and adamantly racially diverse, but it is never made a spectacle or a show. Another Tumblr user, @paraphwrites, said, “he's lonely because he attends a boarding school [with] rich racist pricks. he's lonely because never once in his life has he admitted how the intersection of all his identities puts him in a situation where he is completely alone,” in reference to how Charles deals with the aspects of himself that isolate him. They touch on a very important aspect of his character, which is his intersectionality. The main topic of their original post was how this show caters to the lonely, discussing several instances in which the characters feel isolated and alienated from the world, Charles’ race and ethnicity are one of many reasons of this within his character in particular. They also discuss the parental abuse he faced and the subtext of his mother not doing anything to stop it. There is some subtext that the abuse he and his mother faced from his (White) father may have to do with his mother’s heritage and that they also faced suppression of expression of their culture by their father and husband, respectively. 

Finally, the concept of deviance is represented in just about every aspect of this show. Edwin was murdered for his deviance from the norms of masculinity the times forced onto him, further deviating when he escapes Hell not once but twice, defying the institution he is forced into and having to resocialize into society. Charles deviates not only from the racial norms of the school he is in but also in his style, wearing punk clothing and an earring and refusing to follow the rules placed onto him by the Afterlife institution. Crystal is a deviant because she is neglected and ignored by her parents, causing her to lash out and cause problems for herself and others. Niko is a deviant because of her interests and her more childlike and whimsical nature. Jenny Green (Briana Cuoco) is a deviant because of her style, donning a neck tattoo and dark clothing in this somewhat conservative town. 

All of these different concepts and ideas are well represented within this show. Marx’s conflict theory would have interpreted the show to be an indicator of the social change that happens through societal conflict. Had deviation in the same vein that the characters Charles and Edwin exhibited not occurred, society would be far more regressed than we see now through the more modern lens of characters like Niko and Crystal. Marx would say that all of these different characters, especially Charles and Edwin, experienced inequalities and that these inequalities gave power to the individuals who placed these boundaries on them, allowing for their groups to be pushed down even further. Postmodernist theory would likely have a stronger focus on the differences between Edwin and Charles in comparison to the characters like Niko and Crystal, looking at the way that they interact and especially at the way that they were/are treated in their respective time periods. Postmodernist theory would highlight the differences in the treatment and identities of the boys in comparison to the girls because of the times in which they were born, also looking at the differences between Edwin’s time period and Charles’ and how their different identities would have affected how they were raised. 

Overall, this show successfully represents several different sociological concepts and is reflective of both this time period and the ones represented by the characters in the show. This provides for a very sociologically active show.

References

holy shit guys.

my assignment in my sociology class is to fucking write an essay on the sociological aspects of a favorite piece of media of mine.

THATS LITERALLY WHAT I DO EVERY NIGHT. I GET TO WRITE ABOUT THE IMPACT AND WAY THAT HUMAN SEXUALITY, GENDER (the emphasis on the feminine characters being well-rounded and dynamic as well as tck’s gender non-conformity), THE WAY RACE AND ETHNICITY (mainly charles’ death/the bullying of the pakistani boy that he stood up for), AND DEVIANCE (edwin going to hell for his orientation and then escaping hell which is an institution and how he has to resocialize into society as well as the way that the antagonists are presented) ARE REPRESENTED WITHIN DBDA. FOR A GRADE. I DO THAT SHIT FOR FUN ALL THE TIME. THIS IS THE BEST ASSIGNMENT EVER I LOVE COLLEGE 🗣️🗣️🗣️‼️‼️‼️

[nthspecialll]

Okay here I am again, this time ranting.

I hate the way the majority of the rdr2 fandom recognizes that Micah most likely has his views from his father and upbringing. You once wrote about Bill and his shaping due to the army and I feel like it's very similar with Micah and his father.

I always like to think that Micah is actually the first born, due to it being mostly common naming your first born of the same gender after you, if you want to do so. Therefore I think Micah actually was slightly more influenced than Amos was, also being under pressure with living up to certain standards.

Every character who has had a present parent has been formed by them in some way, shape or form and that the majority of the fandom are aware that Micah was heavily influenced by his father no matter if he was the first born or not.

But I do think that you could be correct, he probably is the older one. It kind of makes me wonder if Amos escaped because their father didn't care to keep him in, or if he escaped because he saw what they did wrong.

[officialpenisenvy]

Since it seems down your alley and idk if youve talked about it before to my knowledge im really curious about your thoughts on trans exclusionary radical feminist fixation on pederasty (see: germaine greer’s the boy) + lesbian desire in relation to the like, archetype of the ganymede + the relation between that and sexual objectification of transfems and the utilization of said ganymede archetype in art as a sort of “agencyless transfeminine” 

okay so i want to say first of all that this is just me talking out of my ass and basically reflecting out loud (most of my blog is, but especially right now), so i don't know how coherent this will be, and i apologize preemptively if any wording on this is questionable or offensive, that is never my intent. i haven't looked into or researched this subject, so if you have any recommendations i would love to hear them! ramble answer under the cut

im very familiar with germaine greer's the boy, i have read it (as much as anyone can be said to have read what amounts to a pederasty-themed photo album) and reflected on it for some time: while the purported effort of the book is to "reclaim" pederasty from gay men towards women, i feel like the very desire to enable women to be pederasts is entrenched in greer's radical feminist background. trans-exclusionary radical feminism is built around bioessentialism, the assumption that men are ontologically different from women, and specifically that men are essentially evil, strong and predatory whereas women are essentially good, weak and preyed-upon: the young boy, however, somewhat disrupts this paradigm, being as he has been historically and culturally objectified and preyed upon and victimized in the same way women have. though he will inevitably grow up to become the evil strong man who harms women, therefore, the young boy can still be enjoyed by the woman while he is weak and essentially harmless, a more even relationship than that between a woman and a man that still allows a potentially heterosexual woman to satisfy her desire for a man; i don't need to specify that in real life we know any relationship between an adult and a child cannot be even and is more often than not deeply harmful to the child, and that the vast majority of adults who do sexual harm to children do so not necessarily because of physical attraction but because of attraction to their helplessness.

all this above is my attempt at finding a terf-ist rationale for female pederasty, but it does also somewhat mirror societal attitudes to the young boy, especially in a gay male context — starting from ancient pederasty up to basically the present day, the young boy is consistently the feminine or feminised party, at least in part due to his fragility and weakness in comparison to the (necessarily) stronger adult lover. the young boy, who i will now start calling the ephebe in this more archetypal context, therefore becomes a very powerful cultural figure of androgyny: ganymede's gender is important insofar as zeus chooses to bring him up to olympus and train him up as a cupbearer (a social role unthinkable for a girl), but his vulnerability and sort of waifishness are properties both of the ephebe and the girl/woman, and the same goes for all other popular depictions of ephebes, they are young boys noted for their beauty and androgyny who are functionally interchangeable with girls. as many queer people are, i find androgyny to be very attractive in all its variations and potential combinations, and i think that's why im so drawn to the ephebe as an archetype (needless to say i don't want to fuck actual young boys): the fascination with this concept of a beautiful boy who's devoid of most stereotypical characteristics of masculinity and who's somewhat forcibly put in the social role of a girl is to me a similar drive to the one that makes me attracted to very masculine women, i really enjoy the deliberate blurring of gender lines (and it would be pointless to hide that i also enjoy the element of coercion, though that is a recurring theme in my sexuality which is not limited to the ephebe).

obviously, all this discussion is separate from attraction to actual trans women: my attraction to trans women is motivated by them being women, so my enjoyment of a fem trans woman is paramount to that of a fem cis woman, my enjoyment of a masc trans woman is paramount to that of a masc cis woman (so coming from that place of liking androgyny), and so forth. of course, whether or not one is attracted to trans women is secondary to whether or not they actually treat trans women as women and respect their identity — plenty of people are attracted to trans women and behave like absolute monsters towards them.

like you said, trans women are horribly objectified and sexualised: to my understanding there's two broad categories of sexual objectification trans women face, being forcibly put in a submissive position (so basically recycling the ephebe archetype, especially coming from people who see trans women as particularly feminine boys), and being forcibly put in a dominant/active position (especially from people who see trans women as men and thus inherently sexually domineering, and who potentially fetishize their genitals as well). the forced submission, while obviously horrible and transmisogynistic and often meant as punishment for the transgression of manhood, isn't in practice terribly different from the forced submission cis women tend to experience to a lesser degree, so it can be in some measure rationalized as assimilable to the sexual treatment one would receive if she were as a cis woman (intersectional parenthesis demands i point out that cis and trans black women sexually interacting with non-black men are more likely to be put in a place of forced domination than forced submission). the forced domination, however, is pointedly and manifestly transmisogynistic in a way that specifically portrays the trans woman in question as "really a man" and "really secretly dominant", often with a very phallic emphasis, and this can be an obvious source of discomfort and dysphoria for trans women, some of whom will try to counteract that by making themselves deliberately more submissive and pliable and non-dominant, basically embodying the feminine and ephebic archetype of passive sexuality, or the "agencyless transfeminine" like you said.

i am not sure any of this makes sense, i hope i was able to be at least somewhat coherent for you anon! i would really love any input or criticism my transfem followers might have on this, since im obviously only speaking from what i have seen and am not a trans woman myself but just a tme yapper on the internet — again im very sorry if any of this comes off as offensive or insensitive, please let me know so i can correct myself if needed.

[t4tstarvingdog]

one of the things i never understood—and maybe this is due to my transfag nature— is the accusation that if i don’t, say, shave my legs and wear makeup, i am “hiding” my femininity. if women (of which i am not included, but do fit into from a transphobic mindset) are naturally feminine (and ought to be feminine) then it should not take more effort to Achieve Femininity. non-actions (not shaving, not applying makeup, intentionally behaving in ‘feminine’ ways, etc.) should not change the status of one’s femininity if it is indeed inherent. but gender, gender presentation, and especially the gender binary, are all socially constructed concepts that aren’t any more inherent than fashion.

[uncanny-tranny]

I think we can absolutely criticize how gender dysphoria is viewed and defined, but sometimes, I think people can swing too far in the other direction to say that gender dysphoria doesn't exist at all, or that anybody who claims to have gender dysphoria simply have internalized transphobia. I really don't think this is helpful to trans people who are dysphoric, and it really puts us in a shameful position wherein our feelings are deemed proof of being problematic or transphobic.

I absolutely don't think dysphoria is required whatsoever to be trans - I hope my blog has made this position clear. I just hate the way dysphoria is understood by cis doctors and medical professionals, who typically do not talk to or try to understand their dysphoric patients. I don't think the solution is to blame dysphoric trans people, though (or non-dysphoric trans people!). We didn't ask for the state of transphobic healthcare. We need to put the blame where it lies - with biased professionals who don't want to accurately understand dysphoria and how it can overlap with trans identity and the transphobic society many of us live in.

[murmurmurl]

I actually find gender swapping characters really interesting (what part of their expression is dictated by gender norms vs certain events in their life vs their personal preferences that wouldn't change either way, etc.) so now I wanna draw what that would look like in my ocs except I am in pain rn so I'm forced to just lie there and be plagued by visions

[shalpilot]

[eepymonstrr]

THE!!!!!!!! MMMM!!!!!!!!!

[t4tozier]

please feel free to elaborate in the tags! i know gender for many people is not as simple as one of these labels or the other, but please choose the one that fits you the best (however you define that)

feel free to take this sister poll as well!

T*RFs and abl*ists do NOT interact 🔪🔪🔪

[sweetlikesunflowersandhoney]

basically i feel like being femme is that life long dream that i'm not really good enough for, like I wanted to be a singer but my voice was just okay, so eventually i need to settle down with a real job that's not my passion but i'm actually good at, aka being more masculine

[friend-of-a-cat]

The Gender Crisis™ is still Gender Crisising™ but I don't have time for that right now lmao.

[phagodyke]

in a hilarious turn of events my flatmate didn't even know I use any pronouns....