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wastedyouth-wasteddreams · 3 years ago

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@crazy105 - Viktor Vektor

She pressed her palm against his wrist and wrapped each finger around the underside of his arm. Sinking her fingertips into him for a reassuring squeeze, and releasing a breath she didn’t realize she was holding. She could hear the hissing of the valve tucked under the monitor to her right. She could feel a soft dry breeze, just cooler than the air, that was brushing against her thigh, but she had no idea where it was coming from. She felt so vulnerable in these situations. Lay back, and practically sinking into the wide leather of the chair. It felt like it was trying to hold her, or restrain her, she couldn’t quite tell which it felt like more.

The warm metal smell in the air was one that she had come to associate with comfort when the telltale scent of sandalwood was also lingering. The sandalwood, coming directly from her left where a tall and imposing figure stood over her. From this angle he looked as wide as he was tall, his features completely shadowed by the surgical lights above him, but she could still see the Lense of his heavy glasses reflecting red as he checked over the monitors across her. A couple of satisfied grunts passed his lips as he traced the readings on screen with a gloved knuckle of his left hand.

His right arm had remained completely still since she wrapped herself around him as thoroughly as possible using the only body part she had available. He always had impeccable bedside manor she thought to herself.

He looked to her as she lay in his chair, body tense, stare firmly fixed on the ceiling, her toes flexing toward the wall, then alternating back to the lights in nervous tension. This was not the girl that Night City knew. In fact, sometimes he got the feeling that he was the only person who got to see this side of her at all.

Her eyelids fell soft as she pursed her bottom lip up and let out another heavy breath. Her grasp on him eased and he could feel a slight tremble. He was relieved that she had loosened her fingers, as he was starting to get a little numb, but he felt an over whelming desire to comfort her when he realized the trembling was coming from her fingertips. That was new.

“are you gonna need that arm for this?”

she could hear the smile in his voice, even though her closed eyes.

A tickle of rouge spread lightly from her temples across the top of both cheeks as her hand pulled away from him. Her head tipping back with raised eyebrows she opened her eyes, and found her gaze resting on his glasses. He guessed her eyes had adjusted to the light, as she was fixed directly to his stare , but he hoped she wasn’t able to see the smile that had appeared out of nowhere when she blushed. That was new too. Trembling fingers, red cheeks, it was as if she was flustered.

She could feel the heat burning on her cheek bones, and she realized she had reached a new point of vulnerability in this chair. There was an unspoked rule between them that her vulnerable side never be spoken of, and knowing that she was possibly going to come off as a softie today, she had brought a bottle of his favorite whisky, to bribe him to silence.

“lights out, kid”

She noticed a calm and softness to his voice as she felt herself drifting away. In the blackened fuzz of coming to, one side of a conversation came into hearing slowly. At first it was just a rumbled murmur, with tone inflections. She drifted again, only when she started to come to this time she caught the end of the conversation.

“well its an explanation at least”

His groaning sigh turned into a slight chuckle.

“Preem. I think she’s waking up anyhow. We’ll see you then” vik talked at the holo, and began to look over to his patient.

He walked over to her holding a chart with numbers rapidly passing back and forth. He sat next to her on his swivel chair, resting his elbows on his knees and adjusted her chair to a more upright position, removing the glare from the lights.

“So misty and Jack are heading to pick up his new chips for poker night. Apparently he bought some kind of collector set, shouldn’t be too late.”

Vik could be heard clearly now at least, even if it sounded like he was talking through a metal box.

“late?” she replied with a perplexed frown.

“ how long was I out for? I thought poker was at 9.30 tonight?”

“yea…we need to have a talk Kid”

he sat up straight and peered over the black frames that were sat a little lower on his face than usual. His eyes were a deep cyan, but with the red lenses from his glasses, they mainly looked a gray purple. It was only like this, with his eyebrows raised, and tilting toward her, that she had ever seen their true colour. Made the bollocking she was aware she was about to receive a little easier.

“firstly all of your monowire should be working smoothly now. And for the record, I was right.”

he nodded at her as if it were some kind of secret sign language for I told you so.

“ You just dislodged the casing from the inner threading, that’s why you thought your radius was twisting out in the first place” he continued.

Then there was a silence. Suddenly the noise of the machines and hum of generators became clear. He paused for a second to think of the best way to approach the subject.

“I had to scan all the way to your elbow for the calibrations you know” the inflections made itr sound more like a question than a statement.

“Vik, come on now. I have to prioritize my upgrades.” She sat up and interjected.

She knew where this was going, and it was about to become a speech. The speech about how she has to listen to her body if she expects it to live in harmony with her tech. He would explain how the extra attention means better usage. The speech would end with a reminder that he will always have an open line of credit when she needs it. To be honest it just wasn’t bad enough to come hassle Vik. Some of her joints were feeling a grind, but that happens, and eventually you just get them replaced. It didn’t seem worth the eddies and time, to spend over 5 hours in a chair just for a little ‘tune up’ that would cost, funnily enough, about the same amount as a retrofit arm and leg. She also hated going under, but didn’t like to discuss that even with herself.

She swung her leg over so her knees were facing him, and tucked them together between her hands as she leaned on the side of the chair.

He knew the speech that he was supposed to say, but he stopped himself, and spoke to her with his own vulnerability on show. He sat up and took his glasses off resting his hands on his knees. She had never seen him without his glasses on, but she realized he was about to say something that demanded she really listen.

“You know, I don’t want you coming in for the extra eddies.”

He pulled himself forward and closed the half metre gap between them. His inner knees just brushed the outside of hers as he jolted to a stop. He looked down to her knees, they looked like two tiny birds nestled together, between his dirty work pants and callused hands.

“I want you coming in because the idea of you being in pain, well. Its one of the few things that keeps me up at nights.”

She felt a sensation on her cheeks again. But instead of it burning, it felt cool. Her eyes were slowly swelling with tears and she felt a hollow lump building in her throat.

He kept his head down as he squeezed her knees inside his for a couple of seconds, he could feel her feet lifting from the ground as he tried to convey his affection using only this one gesture. His legs were so warm, and she could feel the material of her jeans coarsely tracing where their skin could have been touching.

“Vik?” she started a sentence that she couldn’t carry.

She didn’t know what to say, and he could tell. His name came from her mouth as a whisper of air. Not wanting to be heard, but needing to be felt.

“This is my job, Kid. And that wasn’t a normal amount of joint grind, I found corrosion in your right elbow and both your Tibia.” He offered,as a closing to her sentance.

He felt her rolling both her ankles as her eyes slowly tried to find somewhere to stare sheepishly.

“you can’t go around so reckless when I care about you….”

He put his glasses back on, and was suddenly the Dr again. He cleared his throat as he took under her chin with his index finger and raised her face until their eyes locked. She was timid looking, and her brows furrowed with a mix of confusion and shock. He gently pushed down her cheek with his thumb, which allowed the small pool of tears to race down the side of her face.

“Well…when people care about you”

He gave a nod of approval after checking her eyes. Her stomach felt like rows of velvet curtains, with a migration of butterflies flowing through. The tear that tucked under jaw was warm as it began to reach her neck, and started to feel unnaturally heavy.

“thanks for fixing me” he heard her whisper, in a slightly broken voice.

She watched her toes as she flexed and rolled her feet smoothly as when her leg implants were new.

He stood up next to her, and the reality hit him so hard, it felt like he had just taken a shot to the chest. He hadn’t allowed himself to realize what was happening, but she was slowly becoming a very important part of his life. He was thankful jackie told him to check her joints when he popped in earlier, because she obviously wasn’t going to tell him about the pain until she had to get them replaced. It actually hurt when he saw the damage, and thought about her coming in for the past month, without even a single mention. Did she think he didn’t have the time for her? Was she embarrassed about it? Maybe the eddies were too tight? It didn’t matter now. She fixed up, and he hoped the honest chat may bring her to her senses.

She jumped onto her feet to test the impact on her ankles, and he saw her lips turn up to a giddy smile. He tucked her shoulder under his, as reached his hand around past her back to clasp the top of her arm. He pulled her into a side bear hug with a chuckle, and her head rested softly on his chest.

“now” his voice bellowed with confidence as he pointed toward his desk

“This whisky is the first installment of your payment Kid. Misty set up your credit earlier, but take your time. I don’t mind how many visits it takes”

#viktor vektor #cyberpunk viktor #viktor vektor x reader #viktor vektor fic #viktor vector/reader #viktor vektor/reader #cyberpunk fanfic #cyberpunk fic

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thewayshedreamed · 4 years ago

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This Time— Part 4

A Nessian Fan Fic

Fic Masterlist

This update took me longer to get up than I expected! I overthought the shit out of it, but here it is, finally! Hope y’all enjoy a touch of Nessian fluff as much as y’all have appreciated the angst, but also, I’m sorry for the end of the chapter. 🤭

Warnings for strong language, mention of underage drinking, and mentions of grief.

Enjoy!

————————————————————————

After her heart no longer threatened to jump into her throat, Nesta managed to use the restroom and wash her hands, giving herself a silent pep talk in the mirror. She paused at the door, steeled herself, and walked into the bar, as if Cassian hadn’t completely mind-fucked her less than ten minutes ago.

Still determined to keep the night drama-free, she walked over to the bar, ordered herself two shots of whiskey, and walked over to their booth to sit. Amren had returned to the table, joined by Feyre, Mor, and Elain. Nesta slid into the booth next to the birthday girl, greeting her with a bump of her shoulder, and took the first of her shots.

“Oh gods. That looks terrible.” Elain scrunched up her nose as she stared at the next shot.

“It does the job!” Nesta took a deep breath and threw the second shot back with impressive speed. She was usually one to be more conservative on their nights out, so her back-to-back shots were met with cheers from around the table. Elain rested her head on Nesta’s shoulder as she giggled, followed by a slurred, “I’m so happy you’re here, Nessie. I love you.”

They ordered another round of drinks as they changed erratically from one topic of conversation to another. When Nesta heard the ice clinking at the bottom of her empty glass, she suddenly realized the compound effects of her earlier drinks, her shots, and the one she just finished. She noted how her vision was truly starting to blur as the room spun, and she felt her body flush. She leaned over to Elain and let her know she was going to step outside for some fresh air. She assured her repeatedly that she would be okay.— Yes, she had her phone on her.— No, she didn’t need anyone to accompany her. She slid out of the booth and walked briskly toward the front door of the bar.

Once she made it outside, she walked down the side of the building in an attempt to find a quieter spot to lean against the wall. There was a group of men outside; obviously having a celebration of sorts and being as loud and unruly as humanly possible. She aimed to increase her distance from them, walking down the building and closer and closer to the parking lot. She found herself staring down an aisle of parked vehicles, eyes landing on a familiar truck about halfway down the row. Before she realized where her feet were carrying her, she was staring at the tailgate of the truck, hand reaching for the handle. She worked through her faulty, drunken logic.

Surely he wouldn’t mind if I sat on his tailgate instead of the ground.

It’s likely a little safer to sit here than it would be right next to a group of drunk men, alone.

The group would be out for a while yet, so as long as she closed it, he’d never know anyway.

Tired of standing in her wedges and unable to think of a single reason not to do it, she lowered the tailgate. She turned around, braced herself on her hands, and hopped to lift herself enough to sit. She dangled her legs, swinging them back and forth lightly. She took a few steadying breaths, already feeling better than she had inside. There was a soft breeze kissing the back of her neck and cooling her cheeks. She felt incredibly content for the first time in weeks, and she shuddered at how the familiarity of where she sat contributed to the feeling.

After several minutes, she got bored of staring at the few cars across the aisle from her and the ones leaving. She scooted back several feet into the bed of the truck so that her legs were supported and lay back to look at the sky for a little while. She lost herself in trying to identify constellations that her mother had shown her years ago and whispered a quiet hello to the woman she missed so much. It was always surprising to her how many she remembered after all this time, especially considering that the pace of her life didn’t allow for much stargazing anymore.

She was so absorbed in her thoughts that she didn’t hear the footsteps that approached from her left. She had located the five brights stars in a small “v” that told her she was looking at Taurus, and was tracing her gaze up to the two bright stars marking the horns when she was abruptly pulled from her thoughts.

“Well, well. What do we have here?” Cassian asked the question through a soft chuckle, but Nesta still jumped in surprise. Her head popped up, eyes snapping toward him instantly.

“Shit, Cassian. You scared me.” She relaxed into her prior position but angled her chin down to maintain eye contact. It was surprisingly comfortable in the bed of this truck.

He lifted his eyebrows at her words, one lifting slightly higher than the other. They always had when he was truly surprised, not that she noticed. His eyes were still upturned at the corners, and it calmed her to know he wasn’t annoyed with her blatant use of his property.

“I’m sorry?... That wasn’t my intention, but I didn’t really expect to see you in the bed of my truck, either. Kind of seems like you should have expected me to come by at some point, at least.” He was still giving her a mischievous smile, and she realized that she would have to quickly get a leash on her thoughts to get through another interaction.

She squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head quickly. “Oh. Yea. No, I know. I think I just figured that I’d be back inside before you made it out here,” she said, as if it was the most reasonable explanation in the world. “Are you leaving? I’m really sorry, I’ll get out.” She sat up, but before she could start to scoot herself down, a broad hand wrapped gently around her shin.

”Stay. I’m not leaving anytime soon. Kallias left a little while ago, and he called me to tell me he thought he saw my tailgate down. I didn’t remember leaving the bed open, so I came out to check. Relax.” He offered a soft smile, and she felt her heart skip at his sincerity. He removed his hand from her shin to lean forward and brace himself on both hands. Her eyes caught on the little bit of his tattoos that were visible on his chest and traced down his arms. Before she could silently berate herself for her staring, he was speaking again.

“So. What are you doing out here, Archie?” He looked up from the tailgate, amusement crinkling his eyes at the corners. She groaned dramatically at the old nickname that he gave her in high school. She had a love-hate relationship with it; hate because it was awful, love because he coined it. He used it less and less as they got older, but it still made its appearance every now and then when he teased her.

“Gods, can we please let ‘Archie’ go? It’s so terrible.” She couldn’t help the small giggle that erupted out of her as she talked. She took a deep breath before answering his question. “My drinks hit me all at once inside, so I came out to get some fresh air.“ She adjusted her body a little to situate herself and lifted her gaze back to the sky. “I’m doing drunk people things and laying down to look at the stars until I can handle going back in there.” She gave a small smirk as she let her head fall to the side, looking at him again.

“For one, as long as I’m living, ‘Archie’ stays. You might as well lean into it. For two, perfectly reasonable. I’m glad I could offer the proper amenities for your drunk stargazing.” He winked at her then, a friendly gesture rather than suggestive in any way. She could tell he was more relaxed than before, the alcohol likely taking its effect on him, too.

She cleared her throat and asked the question on her tongue before she could think better of it.

“Are you in a hurry to go back inside? Join me?” She patted the space next to her for good measure.

You’re doing a terrible job of ‘leashing’ yourself, Nesta.

“I think I could spare a few minutes for you, Archie.” He turned around and easily sat on the tailgate. He pushed himself backwards to lay on his back next to her, only to be met with her hard glare. He let out a laugh then, shaking his head at her and looking at the sky.

“You know, this is pretty nostalgic.” He brought his arm to rest under his head, settling into a comfortable position as he spoke.

“I have to agree with you on that,” she said through a laugh. It was oddly reminiscent of their late high school and early college days of underage drinking at any and every party. So often, they would find themselves drunk, laying in the bed of his truck or on someone’s porch, sharing drinks and stories from earlier in the night.

“The only thing missing is a pint of cheap liquor that we had no business drinking.”

”Don’t forget the straw.” Nesta was grinning now and resisting the urge to look at him. His proximity, combined with their shared memories, was already a lot to navigate.

”I would never. I’ve received enough verbal lashings in my day to always remember the straw.” They were both laughing now, enjoying the comfortable banter. “I still don’t understand your insistence on that.” Their laughter faded into comfortable silence, and she noticed his head turn toward her lazily once they fell quiet. She looked over at him and watched his Adam’s apple bob before he spoke.

“I’ve really missed my friend,” he said quietly, as he shifted his arm closer to her. He grazed his knuckles over the back of her palm, and his eyes scanned her face.

She continued to look at him, unsure she could break it even if she tried. “Me too. Really.” Her voice was almost a whisper.

He swiftly picked up the heavier atmosphere settling over them and shifted both of his hands toward his body. He laced them over his stomach as he shifted his attention back to the sky. “So, which constellation were you so invested in when I walked up?”

She looked back up at the sky before answering him. “Taurus.”

“That’s a good one. Momma Archie would be proud that you remember.” She was touched by the affection she heard in his voice for her mother. He’d grown close to her in their years as friends and had taken it hard when she passed. His tone shifted into something a little more playful when he said: “Even though you’re feeding every rom com stereotype of the drunk girl, staring wistfully at the stars, and—“

She interrupted him with a laugh and a jab to the ribs. “Shut up! Don’t you dare make fun of me, you shit.”

He feigned a deep groan, as if her jab had truly wounded him, and clutched his side. “Gods, keep your sharp elbows on your side of the truck.” He seemed to recover quickly, his tone dripping with jest, “Is this the part where I point out a really obscure constellation that reminds me of you, and you fall madly in love with me?” There was nothing implied by the question, she realized; his only aim to give her a hard time.

“As if I would expect you to know any of them. Much less the rare ones,” she deadpanned, even though she failed to completely hide her smile. Before she knew what was happening, he was sitting up suddenly and rolling toward her. His hands found each side of her rib cage, and he started to tickle her mercilessly.

“Don’t be a jerk! I’m more than just a pretty face, I’ll have you know.” He was laughing as he spoke, fully delighting in her misery.

“Okay, okay, okay! You win! Cassian, PLEASE.” She was laughing so hard that tears started to pool in the corners of her eyes.

He finally stopped his torture, looking down at her through bright eyes. She was acutely aware of how close his face was to hers, their noses almost touching. She felt the weight of his leg casually thrown over one of hers during the tousle, and she blushed at the heat she felt throughout her body at the contact. His eyes softened slightly and, before she could ask him what was wrong, he spoke softly. “Fuck... I was hoping some time away from you would help a little more.” He lingered for only a couple of seconds, shifted his weight, and rolled away from her to sit up on the tailgate.

It took her mind a minute to realize his meaning, and she immediately felt guilty. This was all her fault to begin with, not only in how she responded to him those weeks ago, but in inviting him to sit with her tonight. She sat up next to him and placed her hands under her thighs to avoid reaching for him.

She furrowed her brows and cleared her throat. “And I’m assuming that it didn’t help as much as you wanted?” It was odd conversation to broach, but it seemed insensitive to say nothing at all.

His hands were braced on the outside of his thighs, his shoulders slumped as he looked out into the parking lot. He turned his head toward her subtly, only looking at her through his side eye.

”Didn’t even touch it.” He gave her a sad smile before he broke eye contact.

One would assume that after ten years of friendship, she would no longer be surprised at how open he could be. She marveled at the genuine man next to her and how he managed to never let the trauma of life change who he was. She envied him, to a certain extent, because she didn’t think herself capable of trying to even fake that level of openness with others.

“Cass, I’m sorry, I—“

”Don’t.” There was no bite in his words, only an insistence that she not blame herself. “It’s ok.” He ran one hand through his long curls before hopping off the tailgate. He extended his hand to her.

“Ready to go back? The ladies will send the troops looking for you if you stay out much longer.”

She accepted his hand long enough to slide off the tailgate and gain solid footing. She smoothed the back of her jeans to make sure they weren’t dusty, straightened her blazer, and offered him a smile.

“You lead the way.”

——————————————————————————

It was only another hour or so that passed before Elain felt she had sufficiently celebrated her birthday. They were sitting in their booth again, joined by Feyre, Rhys, and Azriel. Mor had dragged Cassian and Amren to the dance floor, clearly having gotten her second wind.

Elain yawned and looked over to Nesta. “Nessie... Would you be ready to go?”

”Sure, El. Want me to get you home? I can get us a Lyft.”

”Mmm. I’m thinking slumber party. Your house.” She smiled sweetly, knowing she was going to request birthday breakfast the next morning.

Nesta rolled her eyes knowingly. “Fine. My house it is.” She ordered their car.

“Hey! I wanna come!” Feyre’s blue eyes flared, and her expression was one of a petulant toddler. It was a reaction bred from years as the family baby, always fearing she was being left out. Nesta felt another rush of affection for her; for both of them.

Within minutes, they were piling into a small SUV. Feyre sat behind the driver, Elain in the middle, and Nesta slid in next to her. Their driver was polite and quiet, confirming their destination and falling silent the rest of the drive.

“Nessie, I’m mad at you.” Elain slurred the words as she rested her head on Feyre’s shoulder, eyes closed. Nesta snapped her head in her direction, not even remotely aware of what she could have possibly done to upset her in the last five minutes.

“What the hell for?!” Her voice wasn’t loud, but her surprise was obvious.

”Because you’re friends with Az.”

Nesta was quiet for a moment as she considered. ”You’re going to have to give me more to go off of, El.”

Elain huffed a breath through her nose and said, “You’re so close to Az. And that sucks for me because he’s never going to even look at me. Cause I’m your little sister. And he’s nice and considerate and wouldn’t want to make you mad.”

Ohhh, I see. So she’s confirming what we all knew already. She likes Azriel.

Feyre let out a soft giggle and lay her head on top of Elain’s. She rested her hand affectionately on Elain’s leg, a gesture that aimed to soothe her sister’s drunken anxieties. Nesta couldn’t fight her smile at Elain’s “angry” words and disguised her amusement as best as possible as she spoke.

“Ellie, I wouldn’t worry about that. It’s not like Az is afraid of me in the slightest. Plus, he’s basically the only man that I’d find worthy of you.”

”Okay. Well, nevermind, then.” She yawned and was dozing within seconds.

Nesta’s eyes met Feyre’s identical ones across the car, and they both had to suppress their giggles to avoid waking her. The night had been a roller coaster of emotions, and she wasn’t sure how she could ever survive life’s ups and downs without the two women in the car with her. Sure, there were times where her and Feyre would almost come to blows, and Elain’s gentle spirit would tire of their hotheadedness. But no one else would ever know her like they knew her.

Thinking over the course of the night, she started to feel compelled to reach out to Cassian. She alternated between the compulsion and the rationale part of her brain (likely the sobering part) that was telling her it was a terrible idea.

Are we okay? Does he resent me even more? Is he annoyed that I put us in this position?

Why do you care? This is what you wanted. What you demanded of him.

She suppressed the reason threatening to deter her, opened their text thread, and typed a short message.

N: It was really was good to see you tonight. Sorry I didn’t get to say bye. Just wanted to reach out and tell you to be safe getting home.

She hit send before she could overthink it and locked her phone to avoid staring at the screen. She knew she would only find herself willing the ellipsis to pulse and show he was typing. As luck would have it, they were already pulling up to her apartment complex, and her attention would be monopolized by getting her sisters inside and comfortable. They woke Elain up and prompted her to walk inside to Nesta’s bedroom. She dug through her drawers to get them each some nightclothes, all but forced them to wash their faces, and forced spare toothbrushes into their hands. She padded into her room to change into her own night clothes, plugged in all of their phones, and made sure they each had a pillow across her king bed. She chuckled to herself at the eldest sister caregiving behaviors that would likely never leave her. Elain and Feyre walked briskly into the room, Elain announcing proudly that she called ‘middle’ as the birthday girl. They settled into the sheets and both of her little sisters were asleep within minutes. She was on the brink of unconsciousness herself when her phone vibrated on her bedside table, startling her awake. She blinked against the brightness of the screen to focus on who was calling her.

Shit, it’s Cassian. Shit shit shit.

She hit ‘accept’ and quickly brought the phone to her ear. She whispered her “Hello?” before glancing over at her sisters to make sure they weren’t disturbed. Not in the slightest.

She was met with rustling sounds, much like those of someone’s pocket during an accidental dial, and muffled conversations. She assumed he had, in fact, pocket dialed, but she waited a few more seconds. She told herself she should just in case he was trying to get situated, sabotaged by the alcohol coursing through his system. She repeated her greeting but didn’t want to get any louder for her sisters’ sakes. She was about to hang up when she heard his voice coming clearly through the phone.

“I know! I haven’t seen you in what, almost a year?”

”Yea, almost exactly! I’m surprised we don’t run into each other more often, to be honest.” The second voice was unfamiliar and unmistakably female. She felt her stomach lurch, but she couldn’t hang up.

Cassian laughed casually and said, “No kidding. It’s not like Velaris is so big.”

”Shit. I think my friends are leaving me. I’ll see you next week though, right?” Her tone was clear, insinuating that she knew his answer.

”Absolutely. Is Wednesday after work ok? Around 5:30?”

”Ill be there! Bye, Cassian!” There was more rustling, as if they had come together in a hug, but she acknowledged that her imagination was likely torturing her.

“Sounds like a plan. See you then, Alis!”

Hearing her name is what finally had her ending the call and tossing her phone back onto the table. Her head was swimming. She was suddenly humiliated at her earlier text, wishing she had never sent it.

You should feel better, honestly. He probably doesn’t resent you. He may not have given your actions a second thought at all. He’s moving on.

She turned over before she could be consumed by her thoughts, tucked her face into the side of Elain’s shoulder, and drifted off to sleep.

————————————————————————

A/N: I just want to thank y’all again for the support I’ve gotten for this fic. Y’all really have been the best! My apologies for how this one ended, but we’re getting somewhere, I promise! Please don’t kill me 🙈

Tags are below!

@polireader // @lord-douglas-the-third // @justgiu12 // @notyournymphetish // @sjm-things // @strangeenemy // @iammissstark // @keshavomit // @sjmships // @cookiemonsterwholovesbooks // @dusty-lightbulb // @texas-shaped-waffle-maker // @julemmaes // @charincharge // @superspiritfestival // @awesomelena555 // @sleeping-and-books // @hizqueen4life // @maastrash // @bookstantrash // @rhyswhitethorn // @grace-k-sterling

If you’d like to be tagged in future chapters, you can shoot me a message, comment, or reblog! As always, feedback is welcome!

#nessian #nesta archeron #nesta x cassian #nesta #cassian #acotar #nessian au #nessian fwb #nessian angst #nessian fanfic #acowar #acomaf #nessian fluff #archeron sisters

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imdreamingofaplaceicallhome · 4 years ago

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Winter Things

Type: One-shot about Jonah Rated: PG Word Count: 1800+ Requested: Y/N Enjoy!

I love wintertime, it's time for snug clothes and plenty of holiday cheer. It just seemed to bring out the best of people and I loved the season. It was also the time where we both were really busy.

“Babe?” he asked as he made his way downstairs.

“I'm in the office baby” I responded. “

What are you up to?” he questioned as he leaned against the door frame.

“Just making list,” I said.

“And checking them twice?” he chuckled slightly.

“Maybe,” I said as I got up from my chair.

I made my way over to where he was standing, placing my hand against his chest. He smiled as he leaned down and kissed me softly.

“What do you have planned?” I asked.

“Just wondering if you wanted to go to a bonfire down by the beach” he brushed the hair from my face.

“That sounds fun,” I said as I looked up at him.

“Jack is hosting at his beach house,” he said.

“Well let me go get ready and ill be all ready to go” I smile.

“Ok babe” he leaned down and kissed me softly.

I went upstairs to figure out what I wanted to wear. I didn't want to take a shower and then be in the cold, I surly didn't need to be getting sick. I picked out my black jeans and just a random top. I grabbed a jacket before making my way back downstairs. I slipped on my shoes and grabbed his hand as he was waiting for me.

“Ready?” I asked.

“Always” he smiled as he got up.

We left the apartment and headed down towards the beach. He parked the car and came around to open my door. I smiled and got out, grabbing his hand as he shut the door. We made our way down to where the fire was at. I took a seat next to the fire and Jonah disappeared and I had zero clues where he went. I shrugged it off as I enjoyed the fire, but I must admit it was still cold. I felt someone wrap a blanket around me, it was Jonah as he sat next to me.

“Thank you,” I said as I looked at him.

“I got us blankets and hot cocoa,” he said as he handed me my cup. I smiled and took a small sip from the cup. I snuggled closer to him as we enjoyed the fire.

“Are you cold?” he questioned.

“Nope,” I said as I played with his fingers.

“good” he held me closer to him.

Once more people starting showing up we moved around and started talking to people. There were a few games that we played as well, it was just a low key event. It was nice to have an easy night because our lives can get crazy at times. I lost him in the house somewhere so I started walking towards the beach. I stood near the shore making sure I wouldn't get wet, it was peaceful yet so dangerous at the same time. I held the blanket closer to me as the breeze came from the water was cold. Jonah sneaked up behind me and wrapped his arms around me. I jumped slightly but realized it was him, I leaned back against him. He rested his head against my shoulders.

“I love moments like this” he whispered.

“I love moments like this with you,” I said as I placed my hand on his.

“I do too” he kissed my cheek.

“I love the moments where things are slow and it is just us enjoying each other,” I said.

“I wish we had more time to do things like this,” he said.

“I love our life together and I wouldn't change it” I turned to face him.

“I know and I love you,” he said as he placed his hand against my cheek.

“I love you,” I said as I looked up at him.

He leaned down slightly and kissed me softly. I smiled against his lips before kissing him back, wrapping the blanket around us both. He pulled me closer to him as he wrapped his arms around my waist. He pulled away slightly and rested his forehead against mine. We heard people in the background yelling for us to return. We both chuckled and we returned to the bonfire. We made our way inside where we found Jack giving out jello shots. We took a few shots and played a few rounds of twister but it seemed like Jonah and I always lost. I guess we couldn't keep our hands off of each other or that we couldn't stop laughing.

“We suck at twister” I laughed as I fell onto him.

“Yea we do” he laughed as he fell backward.

“Let's go get some hot cocoa and sit by the fire” I suggested.

“Sure,” he said as he got up and helped me up.

We walked into the kitchen and got the hot cocoa. I also make sure to grab a blanket before we made our way back outside. We sat down by the fire and he wrapped the blanket around us. Pulling me close to him, I rested my head against his shoulder. Soon we both started getting tired so we left the bonfire and went back to the apartment. I ran a hot bubble bath for us both. We both got into the tub and I laid back on him. He wrapped his arms around me as we started warming up in the tub. We finally got out and I wrapped myself in a towel before going into the bedroom. I got dressed in one of his oversize shirts and slipped on a pair of panties. He came in behind me and put a pair of boxers on before we got into bed. I snuggled to his chest as he wrapped a blanket around us. I fell asleep against him and he wasn't too far behind me as he also fell asleep. In the morning I snuggled closer to him as I felt the cold air rushing in. I finally woke up and remembered that we didn't turn the heat on last night. I got out of bed and slipped on my slippers before making my way downstairs. I turned on the heat but I could see why it was so cold. It was snowing I smiled to myself as I looked out the window. I turned on the tv to see how much snow we would get. I also make tea before sitting down on the couch with a blanket.

“Why didn't you come back to bed” he groaned as he made his way downstairs.

“Because someone needed to turn on the heat,” I said.

“Forgot last night,” he said as he made his way into the kitchen.

“Look out the window babe,” I said.

“Whoa, it's snowing,” he said.

“Yea and we are looking into getting a lot,” I said.

“It's a blizzard,” he said as he came back into the living room.

“Yea so much snow” I took a sip from my cup.

“Tea drinkers” he rolled his eyes as he took a sip of his coffee.

“Oh hush it” I rolled my eyes at him.

“Looks like we are stuck in the house” he looked at me.

“That could be fun” I smirked as I took another sip from my cup.

“Always fun with you,” he said.

Once he finished his coffee he came and sat next to me. Pulling me onto his lap so I could wrap the blanket around us both. I snuggled close to him resting my head against his shoulder. Tracing patterns on his chest as he just held me close to him.

“Want to go play in the snow?” he whispered in my ear.

“Maybe in a little while,” I said as I snuggled closer to him.

“Fine by me, I love cuddling you” he smiled as he kissed my cheek.

“Love being close to you,” I said.

He held me close to him as he switched the channels on the tv. I ended up falling back to sleep against him. Later on, when I finally woke up there was so much snow. I went and got my warm clothes as well as a jacket before going outside. He wasn't too far behind me as he ran into the snow. I chuckled slightly as I finally made my way into the snow. We started throwing snowballs at each other.

“Hey that's cold,” I said as I threw a snow ball at him.

“Hey!” he yelled as it hit him in the face.

“Oops” I laughed slightly as he threw another one at me.

The snow was still falling as we were playing around. I went to grab more snow and I slipped. I laughed at myself as he made his way over to where I had fallen. I started to make a snow angel as I looked up at him, he helped me up so that I would make a perfect snow angel.

“Perfect” he smiled as he wrapped his arms around me.

“Just like us” I smiled as I looked up at him.

“I love the snow, so beautiful when it's falling” he looked up at the sky.

“Yea it is” I rested my head against his chest.

“Let's build an igloo,” he said.

“Sounds fun but do you know how?” I questioned.

“It's fun to learn” he chuckled slightly.

We started making one but let's just say it didn't go as planned. It was way harder than we thought it be but we kinda build a fort. It didn't have a roof or anything but he was so proud of it. It started getting dark outside and I was so ready to go inside and get warm. I grabbed his hand and took him inside with me, we hung up our jackets in the laundry room. They were soaking wet, I slipped my boots off at the door. I started warming the water up so I could make hot cocoa as he disappeared into the den. I could hear him starting a fire, soon the house smelled like fire and you could hear the crackling of the wood. I made our hot cocoa and went to find where he was, he already had the blankets ready for us. I placed the cups on the table and I sat next to him. I snuggled close to him and just enjoyed the fire until he turned on a movie. We snuggled with each other for the rest of the night, I loved it when it was winter time because we both slowed down from our jobs. Which meant we had more time to do winter things together.

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loveisblindfanfictionbka · 4 years ago

Text

Love Is Blind: Chapter Eleven

Chris grabbed the woven basket, reusable cotton bag and climbed out of his parked car. He smiled up at the sign across the awning of the building before he opened the door and walked inside. He waved at the receptionist as he walked over to her, “Alexis, is Robyn in?”

“Yea, she should be in her office. Beverly and her should be finishing up their meeting.”

“Great. I’ll go back then. Thanks.”

“No problem.”

Chris walked through the employees only door and continued to the farthest room at the end of the hall. Just as he rounded the corner to Robyn’s office, the door opened. He smiled at Beverly as she moved past him then turned to Robyn as she leaned in the doorway.

“Hey You,” He said with a smile.”

“Hey. What are you doing here?”

“I was thinking my girl would like some lunch.”

“And how did you know I didn’t have plans?”

“I didn't but I was hoping.”

“Aren’t you supposed to be in class?”

“Is that where you would prefer me to be?”

“No but I’m asking.”

“Today is a student holiday and it is my lunch hour. I thought you might wanna have lunch with me.”

“I guess I could.”

Chris shook his head and chuckled, “you know there’s no one around, you don’t have to play so hard to get with me.”

“So first I’m your girl, now I’m playing hard to get.”

“You can definitely be both. It’s been a few weeks, I thought you were done playing me to the left.”

“Christopher, I am not playing you to the left,” Robyn replied as she moved back to let him into her office. Chris set the basket and cloth bag on top of her desk as Robyn moved her folders and papers into an empty file bin.

“Pardon me if I don’t agree with that sentiment. We went out on one real date and you’ve been semi-ghosting me ever since.”

“Chris, I spent the whole weekend with you.”

“Yes, and now I only hear from you if I call you. I thought you had a good time with me.”

“I did. You and Anesa were perfect hosts but one thing has absolutely nothing to do with the other. I’ve just been busy.”

“Ok. You know I can take rejection though. If you want me to leave you alone, I’ll do that.”

“If I wanted you to leave me alone, I’d tell you. My honesty has gotten much better too. I have no need to be coy or scared. I’ve just been busy.”

“Ok.”

Chris had hung up his coat and was sitting in a chair across from her desk while Robyn sat behind her desk, “how have you been?”

“I’ve been great. Working pretty much. You?”

“I’ve been better but I can’t complain.”

“Wanna talk about it?”

“Nothing really to say. I’m trying to decide if I wanna teach a class over the summer.”

“Do you normally work during the summer?”

“Not usually. I have before.”

“What’s holding up your decision?”

“Anesa. I don’t want to have to stick her in summer camp or something.”

“Do you have to work during the summer?”

“No.”

“So why are you considering it?”

“I end up not doing anything for most of the summer.”

“Don’t you go on vacation?”

“Yea for like two weeks. Anesa gets tired of not being around other kids after a while.”

“There’s no kids around when you stay in your condo?”

“No, there’s not a lot of families in my building.”

“Does Baby Girl have any friends?”

“Outside of school, not really. There’s just not really any children anywhere near where we live.”

“That’s unfortunate.”

“Yea, I’m just trying to enjoy her still wanting to be around me so much because I know once she gets older, it won’t be the same.”

Robyn chuckled as she nodded in agreement, “so what did you bring me for lunch?”

“I brought you a southern set up. Sweet tea, fried chicken, potato salad, and my favorite little surprise, sweet potato fries.”

“You cooked?”

“I cooked.”

“Hmmm...you really working to stay on my good side.”

“And be on the inside.”

“Do not start with me. I am at work.”

Chris laughed, “I will dial it back.”

“Thank you. So may we eat?”

“Yes, we may.”

Chris moved to empty the contents of the basket and bag onto the table.

After about 30 minutes, Robyn sat back with her hand on her belly and took a sip of her sweet tea, “I don’t know what I expected when you told me that you cooked but it definitely wasn’t that.”

“Is that a compliment?”

“Considering my food is almost gone, absolutely.”

Chris laughed, “thank you. I tried my best.”

“Your best is more than good enough.”

“Now you’re stroking my ego.”

“It is well deserved.”

“So about me cooking a real dinner for you?”

“You want another real date?”

“Very much so.”

“And where is this supposed to take place?”

Chris wiped his hands with a napkin and got up to walk around to Robyn’s side of the desk. He sat on the edge and she leaned back in her chair with her legs crossed, “you willing to go out of the city with me?”

“Depends on how far we’re going.”

“Pennsylvania.”

“And what do you plan to do with me in Pennsylvania?”

“Well if I told you, it’d ruin the surprise.”

“Well I don’t like surprises.”

“You’ll learn.”

“Somebody’s getting comfortable.”

“I know you and you will push back just to push back. I have to stand my ground at some point.”

“Stand your ground? You wanna go toe to toe with me?”

“You don’t think I can?”

Robyn looked at the door to make sure it was locked before she stood up and moved to stand in front of Chris, “Well that’s not for me to determine.”

Chris gently caressed the side of the face then ran his fingertip along the curve of her earlobe, “well the way you’re talking, it seems like you think I can’t.”

“I thought you didn’t like to make assumptions.”

“I don’t but this is more of an educated guess.”

Robyn nudged her knee between his legs so she could stand between them as she rested her hands on his thighs, “you work out?”

“At least 3 times a week.”

“Nice.”

“Robyn, what are you doing?”

“I felt like getting closer so I am. Problem?”

“Of course not.”

Chris settled one hand on her waist to keep her in place as the other slid along the slide of her neck. Robyn stared directly in his eyes and felt like she was stuck in place. She watched his eyes widened then smolder. Her skin started to tingle and it felt like her breath was caught in her chest. She gave a small indiscernible shake of her head as Chris smiled at her, “not possible.”

“Everything I told Anna was true and I believe what you told Christian was true as well. Like I said, I have no reason to play coy with you.”

“This isn’t supposed to be happening. We talked about this.”

“What’s happening isn’t actually being forced to happen. I am in love with you. Still.”

“Christopher.”

“You love me. I know it even if you don’t want to.”

“This isn’t going anywhere.”

“I never said it was, doesn’t change the fact that I still love you, Robyn.”

“You couldn’t have just kissed me and not said anything?”

“I still can.”

“Nope. Vibe killed.”

Chris chuckled as Robyn sat back down in her office chair, “how does me reiterating something that I’ve already told you kill the vibe?”

“You told me that when we were still technically strangers. I didn’t have to look at you when you said it.”

“You didn’t think I was serious?”

“I know you were but at the time I wasn’t the ex-wife, it wasn’t my concern on how deep those feelings went. To say you’re still in love with me is different than still loving me, Christopher.”

“You sound upset. Did I offend you?”

“No, I was looking forward to the mood we had going that’s all. This made it more serious than I would’ve liked.”

“Ah. My apologies.”

Robyn waved her hand, “what time do you have to be back?”

“I don’t.”

“I thought you were just on your lunch hour.”

“Technically but I’m also not teaching today so I can go home if I feel like it.”

“Why’d you make it seem like you had a time limit?”

“You made it seem like you really didn’t want me around for too long.”

“That’s not the case.”

“I guess.”

“What time are you out of here?”

“I always leave after 6 but my last appointment is at 3.”

“So what do you do for three hours?”

“Whatever needs to be done. There’s nothing waiting at home for me to rush.”

“How about I change that?”

“What are you talking about?”

“I’ll have something waiting for you at home.”

“Like what?”

“You’ll see.”

“Just because I’m curious,” Robyn moved to grab her purse from out of a desk drawer and grabbed her spare house keys, “I’ll give you my keys.”

“You have to be home by 6, not leaving here at 6.”

“Ok.”

“Don’t say ok then show up late.”

“I won’t. I promise.”

Chris nodded his head then moved to clean up the remnants of their lunch off her desk. Robyn stood up to walk him to her office door and leaned against the handle after she turned the lock, “whatever you have planned better be good.”

“It’ll be better than good.”

“Will you be there when I get there?”

“We’ll have to see.”

“Surprise, huh?”

“You’ll learn to love them.”

Chris pecked her lips before leaving her office. Robyn leaned against the doorframe as she traced her fingertips over her mouth.

Robyn cautiously turned the knob on her front door and frowned when she noticed it was locked. She looked at her phone and it was 6 on the dot. There was no way Chris really gave her a surprise and left. She unlocked her door and carefully walked in, the scent of vanilla and cinnamon wafted past her nose. She sat her purse and jacket on the side table by the door and closed her front door behind her.

“Chris, are you here?” She called out. There was no answer. Robyn shrugged and moved towards her kitchen where the smell was coming. Her dining table was set up with dinner for one. A large vase of roses sat in the middle of a silk runner surrounded by electric candles. In front of the chair at the end of the table closest to her, there was a small box with a large card set in front of it. She walked over and grabbed the card to read aloud, “I’d figured the last thing you’d want to do is cook dinner for yourself so dinner for one is served. Your plate is warming in the oven. Yes, I ate so do not worry about me. Enjoy! Love, Chris.”

She set down the card and moved to her oven. It was set to 250 degrees to keep everything warm. She turned off the oven and opened the door; there was a large platter covered with foil and a covered square cake pan. Robyn moved the pan and platter to the island and uncovered it.

“Where did this man learn how to cook, Le Cordon Bleu?” She murmured to herself as she looked at the roasted chicken with roasted vegetables and rice pilaf. The cake pan was home to homemade cornbread.She cut a fairly large chunk of cornbread to put on the platter then set it on the dining table. She went to the fridge to grab something to drink and there was a large pitcher of iced tea on the top self next to a cheesecake with a note on the storage lid that said dessert in capital letters. She grabbed the pitcher, a glass out of the cabinet then set it on the dining table before she went to get her phone out of her purse. It took a few moments before Chris answered, “Yes Robyn?”

“What time did you get to my house?”

“Why?”

“This had to have taken hours to make all of this.”

“Not really, if you know how to manage your time.”

“Don’t be facetious. This is a lot, Christopher.”

“It is but you deserve it. You’re always working so you should have somebody take care of you every once in a while.”

“Why didn’t you stay?”

“Because it’s not about me. Have you eaten yet?”

“No, I just finished getting my food out of the oven. How did you have it ready in time?”

“That is my secret that you don’t get to know.”

“Seriously?”

“Yes seriously.”

“I wish you would’ve stayed. We could’ve had dinner together.”

“We have time for that later, I just wanted you to enjoy your night.”

“Thank you. This really does look incredible.”

“No problem. I’m always just a phone call away if you need something.”

“I appreciate that.”

A few moments of silence passed before Chris spoke, “did you need something?”

“Can you facetime with me while I eat? Doesn’t feel right to eat this by myself.”

“Sure I can. Let me see if I switch over while we’re still talking.”

A few more moments passed before Chris’s face appeared on her phone screen, “is this better?”

“It’s perfect.”

Robyn propped her phone up against the box that was left on the table then sat down to eat her dinner.

“Oh, and what’s in this box?”

“I’m surprised you didn’t open it.”

“I was distracted by the food.”

Chris laughed, “it’s just something to help you relax after you get off work. I think you’ll like it.”

“Should I open it now?”

“Not if you don’t want to. It’s nothing fragile or perishable. Besides I don’t want your food to get cold.”

“I’ve finished damn near this whole plate, won’t nothing get cold but the crumbs.”

Chris laughed, “I’m glad you liked it. I tried my best.”

“When did you get to be such a good cook?”

“When I didn’t have you to do it for me anymore.”

Robyn chuckled, “how did you learn?”

“Part of my therapy was to find something new to be passionate about. I went back to playing music and I decided to pick up cooking. I took a few classes over the course of about six months. It wasn’t as difficult as I thought and I guess I picked up something from watching you all those years.”

“Really? I guess you sitting up under me in the kitchen was worth it.”

Chris laughed, “it was always worth it. Watching you move around was the best, I wasn’t even that concerned about the food.”

“I figured that.”

“So how you feeling?”

“I feel good. Still wish you were here.”

“Do you really want me to come over? I’d have to bring Anesa with me.”

“That’s fine. I’d love the company.”

“Then I am on my way.”

“Thank you.”

“No need. We’ll see you in a few.”

#chrianna #loveisblindfanfiction

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cyberghouleo · 6 years ago

Text

Stuck With You {Smut}

This is just pure smut, I’m sorry yall

Words : 4.1k

AO3 link

While you and Bakugou were supposed to be friendly towards each other, like everyone else in 1A, his attitude that was basically him just being an insufferable prick 24/7, made that very difficult. Even though he saw most of the future heros in his class below him and while he did treat them like shit, he felt for some reason to always be a dick towards you, which probably had to do with the fact that you didn’t put up with his shit most of the time, firing back with some more snarky comments. The past week had been the worse though, since after all the new dorms were put up, it only meant you had to see him outside of school too.

Although you were rarely paired up with him for training, today Aizawa thought it was going to be a great idea to put you two together, explaining that it would help both of you to learn how to counter more attacks and build each other's quirks, but Bakugou said that it was just going to be bullshit and that it would be an unfair fight since he was just going to destroy you.

Hearing him say that only made you want to beat him even more, so during the training you made sure to at least land some cheap shots, just trying to show that you weren’t as weak as he thought you were. Even though he did get a few more hits on you, it still wasn’t a complete loss, so you were a little happy that he couldn’t go around boasting about how he complete destroyed you, like he said he would.

You were currently changing out of your hero costume in the girls locker room, sighing as your body was extremely tired and sweaty, making it harder to peel off your clothes. The sound of the door closing caused you to look up, only to see Momo standing there with Mina.

“Oh hey (Y/N)!” Mina greeted while flashing you a smile, walking over to her locker to grab her phone which she seemed to have left after training.

“Hey guys, you guys haven’t left yet?” You asked, finding it abnormal that they were still around since their training ended a while ago, leaving you and only Bakugou in the training rooms.

“Oh, Mina left her phone so I figured I would walk back down with her.” Momo stated, grabbing Mina’s jacket from her hands so she could close her locker easier. “We also came down here to ask you a question. All the girls decided they wanted to go out and try this new restaurant, and they wanted to know if you could come!” You thought for a second to try to remember if you had any plans for tonight, despite it being a Friday you had just planned on staying in your dorm and sleeping, but you shrugged your shoulders.

“Sure, I have nothing else to do tonight. What time?” You asked, looking over your shoulder as you searched for your spare clothes from your locker.

“Probably around 7 or 8-ish. We’ll just text you alright?” Mina said, while they both walked out of the locker room.

You had figured that they were only in a rush to get ready for tonight, but you shrugged it off and tried finding the pair of sweatpants you thought you had in your locker. The only thing you could find was your school uniform, the last thing you would want to change into, but you just went with it and closed your locker and started heading towards the showers. You had planned on just taking a shower in the shared showers that was connected to the locker rooms, and just go up to your dorm and change and get ready for the girls.

As you finally stepped into the water stream, you let out a groan as the hot water helped soothe your tired muscles. You didn’t think you were going to be that tired from training, but you weren’t that surprised since you did train with Bakugou. As much as you hated the kid, you couldn’t deny the fact that he was talented and could have probably beat your ass if you weren’t as stubborn as you were. Just as you were about to wash your hair, the water almost instantly went cold, causing you to curse out. You let out of huff, trying to wash your hair as fast as possible before you froze to death. When you got out of the once hot shower, you quickly dried off and blow dried your hair, trying to warm yourself up.

You stopped at your locker, grabbing your duffle bag and phone, seeing that your phone was about to die and that you only had an hour or so to get ready, which only made you more pissed off. You stepped out of the locker room, seeing that the halls were completely empty and silent, which was normal considering that all the teachers had left and most of the students were out spending time with their friends on this Friday night. You pushed your duffle bag further up your shoulder, walking over to the elevators since you were too tired to even think about going up the stairs.

You pressed the button, checking your phone while you waited. After what seemed to take almost two minutes, the elevator finally opened up and you stepped inside and pressed the button to close the door. When it was only a few inches from closing, a foot stopped the door from closing all the way, before the doors opened up again to allow the person to come in. You glanced up from your phone to look at the person who stopped you from being able to be alone for the ride. As you looked them up and down, you felt dread hit you instantly when you realized it was the one and only, Katsuki Bakugou. This was the only time you saw him without his hero costume or school uniform, as he was now wearing grey sweatpants with a black tank top.

“Why haven’t you left yet?” You asked in a monotone voice, not bothering to look up from your phone again.

“Tch, the fuck does it look like I have been doing,” He asked, which caused you to give him a quick side glance, before rolling your eyes and just going back to playing on your phone. “I just got done showering, dumbass.”

“Yeah, thanks for taking up all the hot water.” You said sarcastically, which he only huffed at.

“It’s only pay back for getting those cheap shots on me, which you didn’t fucking deserve to get.” He fired back as clicked a floor button, which just happened to not even be close to the floor you actually needed.

You reached around his arm, pressing the floor 3 button and stood by the door, wanting to get out of this elevator as soon as possible.

“Why the fuck do you need that floor?” He asked, but it really only came out as a demand.

“I have to get papers from Aizawa’s room before I go over to the dorms.” You said, rolling your eyes since you had no idea why he wanted to know what you were doing so badly.

You heard the door ding a couple times, before it started shaking a bit. You shrugged it off as being normal, but once the lights started to flicker, you started to get a little nervous. After the elevator stuttered a bit, it finally evened out and it beeped again. You were still looking at your phone when you got shoved from the back, which made your bag drop down and tugged at your already sore arm. You looked up to see that you were at your floor but you were already falling towards the ground before you realized it. Just as you were about to yell at Bakugou, the doors started closing again while you were halfway between them. You let out a grunt as you felt the door close around your waist, with you slightly bent over and your phone and bag went flying in front of you, laying out across the hall’s floor.

“Thanks asshole, now the elevator is fucked up and I'm stuck because you’re so impatient.” You yelled back at him, looking around the halls to see that the lights were all dimmed and that it was empty, so even calling out to someone for help would be useless.

“Not my fucking fault you were looking at your phone.” He said, looking at your bent over form, your school skirt slightly riding up with your black lace panties showing. If it would have been anyone but you, he would have ignored it and just roll his eyes at it, but he couldn’t help staring for a few more seconds, taking it in as you groaned. Although he acted like he hated you, he couldn’t deny that he hasn’t thought about you in some romantic way, which some could say was just a crush, but he always denied it and just treated you like shit so his feelings would never come up.

“Yea well now I can’t even get my phone because I can’t reach it and it’s probably dead. So thanks you dickhead!” You yelled back, letting out a frustrated sigh as you tried to wiggle out of the door’s grasp.

“S-Stop doing that!” He shouted back, watching as your ass jiggled as you tried to escape, which didn’t help the blood rushing to his lower half. He knew that seeing you like this was wrong and he should just try to help you get out, so you both could go about your day, but he couldn’t help thinking that this was revenge for when you left a huge bruise on his side during training. Even though he might have a crush on you, thinking back to all the little stunts you pulled during training only made him smirk and he suddenly stopped feeling bad for you being in this position.

“I’m trying to get out since you obviously aren’t helping me! Ugh, we are so fucked since there is nobody around anymore.” You groaned out, still trying to wiggle out. “I knew these dorms were a bad idea.” You mumbled out, trying to stretch out to grab your phone, even though it was only a few inches from your reach.

The further you stretched, the higher your skirt got and exposed more of your ass, which only made Bakugou smirk even more. Sure he’ll probably feel bad for doing this later, but he saw the way you looked at him sometimes and he knew you would want this too. He got closer to you, leaning down a bit to help bring your skirt up higher, which caused you to gasp out.

“W-What the hell are you doing?!” You asked, now feeling how exactly exposed your lower half was.

“I’m trying to help you dumbass.” He said, now tracing the outline of your panties with his finger, just barley ghosting his finger around it, which caused you to shiver. As much as you did hate him and wanted to get out of this trapped hell hole, you couldn’t deny that this was a little hot.

“I don’t see how this is helping.” You muttered, glancing back to look at him, now seeing his hard dick print through his sweatpants. Your face quickly heated up and you looked forward again, you couldn’t believe this was happening.

After he traced the outline a few more times, he grabbed the top of them and yanked them up over your hip bones, which caused you to squeal out of embarrassment. He stared at your form for a second, biting his lip before he softly dragged his finger over your clothed folds, which caused you to let out a shaky breath. He kept doing it, seeing how wet your panties were already getting as you squirmed against his touch.

“Bakugou…” You quietly moaned out, feeling even more ashamed since you knew you weren’t supposed to be enjoying this. You hated him, you knew this. Or at least you thought you hated him, but right now you were starting to second guess that.

As soon as he heard you quietly moan, he smirked and pulled your panties to the side, teasing you even more. You whimpered, trying to grind up against his fingers even more, but he quickly slapped your ass as a punishment. He slid your panties back over, pulling them up again so they grinded against your folds again. He slapped your ass a few more times, which caused you to thrust your hips forward, trying to avoid the stinging pain. He watched as your ass jiggled against his palms, gripping both of them in each hands, massaging them and pushing them together.

You looked around in embarrassment, praying nobody saw you in this humiliating position with Bakugou. You wouldn’t be able to live this down if anyone caught a glimpse of the both of you. You quickly gasped as you felt your panties being torn down, leaving you completely naked now. You looked back and watched as Bakugou bit his lip, taking your form in, giving a smirk towards you while rubbing your folds up and down.

He pushed your ankles further apart so he could look at you better, grabbing both of your lips to spread you open fully, making you to let out a whine. He traced his middle finger up and down from your clit, causing your thighs to tighten up at the sudden feeling. He teased your hole while he rubbed your clit, quickly slipping a finger inside you, which made you gasp and whine at the same time. He felt you tighten up around his fingers, rubbing your clit even faster now as his finger pumped in and out. He inserted another finger, curling up as you pushed your ass further up to him, which he responded with another slap.

The combination of him rubbing your clit and curling his fingers inside of you caused you to cum rather quickly, your body feeling even more exhausted than before. He slowly removed his fingers, watching as your cum dripped down onto the floor and some onto your legs, taking his fingers and licking them clean, rubbing them up against your folds again.

You glanced back, eyes still glazed over from being over stimulated, watching as he stared at your position with his sweatpants now hanging down dangerously low past his hip bones, his cock leaking with a bit of precum because of the past events. You watched as he slide them down, his dick springing out fully hard and ready.

“W-Wait! Bakugou we can’t.” You said, worried laced with your voice.

“Why the hell not.” He said, tilting his head slighting as he pumped his cock up and down in his hand.

“Somebody might see us!” You said, which only caused him to shake his head and roll his eyes.

“You said that nobody is around here.” He said, mocking your voice as he watched as some extra cum dripped out of you.

“Yeah but what if one of the teachers is still around?” “I don’t give a shit. You weren’t worried when I was fingering you.” He said, his bluntness and him rubbing his dick up against you, coating it in your wetness, made you blush and you looked away from him.

The elevator shifted again, causing your upper half to be pressed against the hall floor, now you were face down ass up in front of him, which only made it easier for him to grind up against you. He took a step back, pumping his dick one more time and took in your figure another time, before lining himself up with your exposed hole and slowly inserting it. You gasped, already clenching around his tip. Once he was fully in, he let out a soft groan which he must have been holding in. He leaned down so his chest was now flush with your back, moving your hair over to the side so your neck was now exposed to him.

“Plus, at least you're stuck here with me,” He whispered in your ear with his now husky deeper voice. “Imagine being stuck in here with Mineta, alone and in this position.” He said while pulling back and thrusting into you again, causing you to let out a small whine.

“S-Shut up you bastard,” You retorted back, still trying to not completely submit to him.

He only responded by thrusting into you deeper, gripping your hips to get a better grip on you and to make it easier to get his cock deeper inside you. He groaned out, closing his eyes as he felt you tighten up again around him. He started kissing your neck, before clamping down on it and started sucking, trying to form a quick hickey so he could mark and tease you about it later. You moaned, trying to push yourself back on him to get more of him once he stood up, while moaning and clenching your hands into a fist.

“Moan my name,” He commanded, slowing down his thrust.

“Please...Bakugou,” You moaned, not used to hearing his name while you were in this state.

He leaned forward and gripped your hair at the base, yanking it upwards so he can reach the base of your neck easier. He leaned in closer before whispering, “No, moan my actual name,”

“Katsuki.. Please fuck me,” You moaned out, feeling him get off your back and start thrusting harder again.

Katsuki stared down at you, watching as your mouth fell open, whines and moans escaping rather loudly as you drooled, so caught up in his movements and how good he felt inside you, that you didn’t care who saw or who heard the two of you. The sight of you being completely under him and him having control of you would be able to make him cum alone, the image being a big contrast for your normal stubborn and snarky attitude towards him. He let out a growl like noise, picking up pace as your moans got higher pitched. He could feel himself getting close, as he felt you starting to clenching more around him.

“Katsuki, can I cum,” You moaned out, more like a statement rather a question, feeling yourself starting to lose control.

“No, beg for it,” He huffed back, almost stopping his thrust which made you groan as you were so close.

“Please Katsuki, please let me cum! Let me cum around your cock, please!” You moaned out, trying your best to get him to let you release yourself.

“Good girl,” He growled against your neck, picking up his normal pace again. “Cum for me then babygirl.”

You felt him raise your hips up higher, as he rubbed your clit while his dick pushed further into you. Feeling overstimulated, you gave in and clenched around him as you rode out your orgasm. He clenched his teeth as he felt how tight you had gotten, giving a few more sloppy thrusts before feeling himself tighten up as he felt his hot jizz go inside you. He gave a few more thrust, trying to make it last for as long as possible, your body moved almost like a rag doll for the pure exhaustion you felt.

He slid out, watching as some cum dripped down to your socks, coating your inner thighs as you tried to catch your breath. He bit his lip, taking in your now swollen and twitching pussy for one last time, since he figured he would be dead after you got unstuck. He saw you trying to push yourself up from the floor, only for your arms to shake and make you fall back down. He grabbed your panties and skirt, placing them back in place before he grabbed the elevators door, using a small explosion to help bend it back into place. Once your body became free, you sighed and slowly pushed yourself onto the hallway floor. Katsuki followed out of the elevator with you, lending you a hand to help you get up.

You looked up, your eyes still glazed over and your hair slightly messed up, looking up to his red eyes, which held something other than anger for once. It was almost like they looked calm and a little bit worried. You went to take his hand, but just let your arm flop back down to your sides. He raised a brow at your actions, not used to seeing you this defeated looking.

“My whole body is sore and my legs feel like jelly, I can’t get up.” You muttered, which seemed to get a quiet chuckle from him.

“Tch, I wasn’t that rough… was I?” He asked, leaning down to pick up your phone and bag.

You gave a small smile, so the great Bakugou does actually worry about someone other than himself, you thought to yourself. “No, you were fine. I do have to go get ready to go out though,” You said, forcing yourself to stand up, which only made your legs shake and almost fall over.

“With those legs? No you’re not.” He said before picking you up by your waist, which made you gasp when he threw you across his shoulder. You quickly tried to bring down your skirt so you weren’t exposed again, but you were quickly stopped when he swatted away your hands.

“You’re fine, so stop it dumbass.” He muttered out as he walked down the stairs with you, almost as if it was nothing.

You yawned, feeling too tired to even try to fight with him again. You snuggled into his back, taking a deep breath of his scent which was now somewhat calming to you. “Where are we going?” You asked, rubbing your eyes to shield it from the now bright sunset.

“Back to my dorm. I’m not letting you go out tonight, especially when my cum is still inside you.” You blushed at his words, shaking your head and letting out a small huff.

You weren’t sure how your feelings towards Bakugou were, you knew you hated him sometimes, but right now, you didn’t exactly mind seeing this softer side of him. You had closed your eyes, trying to figure out how he thought of you when you heard the door open up, opening your eyes to be greeted with him entering his dorm. He dropped you off his shoulder, falling into his soft bed which smelled exactly like him. You sat up for a second, only to have a pair of his clothes being thrown at you, which you quickly put on in your tired state, not caring that you were now somewhat naked in front of him again. After getting dressed you quickly found his blankets as you laid back down, curling up in them as you drifted off to sleep rather quickly from being sore.

He sat down your bag and plugged your phone in, seeing that the girls group chat was blowing up with questions about where you were. He gave a slight smirk, looking over at his bed to see you passed out. Even though he wouldn’t tell anyone, he is still proud that he was able to make you be submissive to him, especially with the hickeys on your neck and his clothes that were now draped against your body. While that did boost his confidence, he still didn’t know how to feel about you exactly. He knew it was a different feeling that he hadn’t felt before, but he wasn’t sure if he had fucked up any chance of you guys even being friends, let alone being anything else.

He sighed and took off his tank top, climbing over your now sleeping body before getting under the covers and laying down next to you. He was playing on his phone with his arm down at his side when he heard you groan and turn in your sleep. He glanced over at you to see that you were now laying facing towards him, with your arm outstretched by your side. You felt around the bed for a second before you came into contact with his hand, stopping for a second before lacing your fingers with his. Seeing you do this made him blush as he averted his gaze. Now he definitely had to do something about his feelings towards you.

#smut #katsuki bakugou #mha bakugou #bnha bakugou #bnha #bakugou x reader #bnha katsuki #katsuki bakugo x reader #bakugou smut #katsuki bakugo imagine #mha #im sorry yall this is some creepy ass shit but yea its kinda hot sorry lmaooo

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cha-lyn · 5 years ago

Text

The Perfect Pair

18+ only pls.

Warnings: S m u t . Sneakin around sex. Fingering. Cussing.

Summary: Bucky gets back in the sack & has a one night stand that ends up staying the night unexpectedly.

A/N: I wrote this last night before passing out.

- - -

“Mmm... I don’t usually do this,” you say again as he kisses your clavicle.

“Do what?” He lifts his head, to look up at you in the dim light. “Come twice in a row?”

You cackle. “No. Make out with random guys at sketchy bars and then go home with them.”

“Oh. That. First time for everything, I guess.” he shrugs.

You look at him funny. “A guy like you doesn't get all the ass in Brooklyn?”

James laughs, dropping his head back onto his pillow. “No, not really. My roommate does though. He’s insufferable.”

You roll your eyes and they settle on a hickey on his neck, close to the top of the black Henley he didn’t take off during sex. Kinda weird, but you don’t judge. “Sorry about that.”

He smirks, “Yours are worse.” He reaches over to trace the purple spots scattered about your breasts. “I’ve never seen a more perfect pair…”

Before you can respond to your phone rings. It’s your cousin who you were supposed to meet 20 minutes ago. “Uh, can you do me a solid and not speak? It’s my cousin. He’s super protective.”

He shrugs and moves off his bed to find his boxers.

“Hey. Oh yeah. Sorry. Uh-I got distracted. Yep, leaving her house now. Okay. Chinese place on Gates and Tompkins. Yeah. Mm love ya. Bye.”

“Well, it was good to meet you Y/n.” He reluctantly handed you your bra, having no shame as he stared at your bare chest one last time before your clothes covered you up.

“You too, James.”

“Stay warm.” He showed you out and you waved bye before rushing down to the street and shooting a text your cousin, giving him your eta.

He was waiting for you outside the Chinese place.

“Y/n! It’s been too long!” He gathered you in a tight hug.

“Sammy!!! We missed you at Easter.”

“Ah, I know. I just have a lot on my plate saving the world and what not.”

You roll your eyes and follow him into the restaurant. You love Chinese food at late hours of the night. You and Sam chatted until about 11:45 when you yawned so loud the table next to you stopped eating.

“Shit I’m sorry Y/n. I forgot you probably had a long ass day. Let’s head back to my place, I washed my sheets for you, I’ve got the couch. I made my roommate clean the bathroom.” Sam doesn’t let you protest and leads you back to his place.

The building seems familiar but it’s New York they all look the same. You think the same thing about the elevator but push it away thinking an elevator is an elevator.

“Oh, just a warning. My roommate Bucky can be kind of a dick. He’s the brooding centurion type. Killed too many people to count type.”

You’d seen his roommate in pictures and on the internet. The infamous James Buchanan Barnes. Assassin guy. Bucky to his best friend Captain America. You’d thought he was hot with the angry murder look on his face. And the dark, long hair and beard. Sexy metal arm.

“Hey Buck I’m home. My cousin is here, please be decent.”

“Shut the fuck up Sam. One second,” Bucky calls from the other room

You sit at the bar and look around. “This is a nice place Sammy. I-”

It was like a movie then. Slow motion. Sam’s voice fades out and you lock eyes with Bucky.

James.

Guy you had fucked two hours prior.

What were the odds of that. Truly.

Bucky stepped forward to shake your hand. “Nice to meet you Y/n. I’ve heard a lot about you.” He winked.

“Yea uh thanks for letting me crash here.”

“Not a problem.” The eye contact between the two of you was intense but somehow Sam missed it, distracted by something else.

“Holy shit Barnes! Is that a hickey? Look at that hickey Y/n! You finally got laid!”

You want to vomit. You gave him that hickey.

“Fuck off Sam.” Bucky looks down at his feet, refusing to look at Sam, much less you.

Sam continues to howl as he waves you down the hall. “Y/n. Lemme show you my room. Tin Man got some ass tonight--crazy. I’m sure you wanna get some sleep before you interview tomorrow afternoon.”

“Oh interview. Where?” Bucky asked, curious, leaning against the wall.

“Shield. I’m putting in a good word for her. Nepotism and all.”

“Cool,” was Bucky’s reply. You could feel his eyes on the back of your head.

Sam shows you his room and the bathroom, which you hear none of because you are silently freaking the hell out.

You’d slept with Bucky Barnes. How had you missed that?! You try to breathe deeply. His hair was cut short. James was a common name. His beard was gone. He’d kept his shirt on during sex and it was pretty dark. Anyone could have made that mistake. Right?

“Kay, well I’m hitting the sack. Y/n if you need anything I’m down the hallway in the living room.” He shuts the door.

You change in some sweats and a t-shirt. You head to the bathroom to do your nightly routine. You lay out your clothes for the next day, then get into bed. You can’t sleep. You take off your sweat pants, how you usually sleep. Still wide awake.

Too many unfamiliar noises. You can hear Sam’s snoring from down the hall and murmuring from the wall shared with Bucky. You slip out of the bed and press your ear to the wall, as if you’ll hear something. You do.

From the sound of it Bucky was playing a computer game. “Shit who has the castle guarded? I’ve got incoming trolls. Where’s my backup?”

What fucking nerd.

You really needed your sleep tonight. So you did what anyone would do--you were gonna politely ask him to be quiet and go back to bed. You tiptoed out of Sam's room in your oversized T-shirt you slept in, gently shutting the door behind you. You knocked softly at Bucky’s door. Once. Twice.

Finally it swung open, and Bucky looked like he was about to cuss you to the moon and back, but he stopped short. “Hey.” He blatantly checked you out, eyes pausing at the hard nipples poking through your shirt and bare legs. “What’s up?”

“I was wondering if you- well I was trying to sleep- I heard that you were up…” you were stuttering as your eyes took in the shirtless guy in front of you, metal arm on full display. It was shinier, sexier in person. Much sexier.

“Y/n?”

“Oh um.” Your eyes trailed down his body. His sweats hung so low on his hips. You lick your lips. “Sam’s asleep.”

His lips twitch as he pulls you into his room swiftly, silently shutting the door behind you. “Sam is asleep. Sam is also your cousin.”

“Yeah. So?”

“So this is … this is weird now? Right?”

“Not really. I’m not tryna fuck my cousin.”

Bucky contemplates your eloquent words before nodding. “You have to be quiet. I’m stronger than him, but he can still kill me if he’s mad enough.”

You smirk and pull at those sweats. Bucky kicks them off, picks you up and pins you against the opposite wall, mouth finding yours quickly. Moan softly into his mouth as the cold hits your ass. It was the right night to wear a thong.

“Shhh,” he warns as he moves his mouth down your neck. “Take your shirt off. I need to see.” He does it for you instead of waiting.

“No more hickies. Bucky.” He chuckled into your skin before he pulled back.

“Your breasts. Shit. They are. Fucking perfect. All of you is but--” He dove in to suck on one. “These.” He switched to the other. “Are fantastic.” He moved his flesh hand up to pinch the other one.

Your hips bucked against the wall but the metal arm held you steady. He moved his flesh hand down your front to brush over you clit.

“W-wait. Use your metal one.”

The surprise on his face quickly melted into something else. His hands switched, flesh arms supporting you and metal hand pushing your thong aside to feel how wet you were, mouth reuniting with yours as he did. He wasted no time shoving two fingers into your folds, swallowing your moan in his mouth. Your hands grab at his back.

“You ready for this dick again?” He curls his fingers inside you, making you mumble and beg incoherently. He removed his fingers slowly and even more slowly he brings them up to his mouth, sucking them briefly. “You taste good. Here.” You open your mouth to taste yourself. Swirling your tongue over his fingers. He growls and replaces those fingers with his tongue while his hand retreats to drag his hardness across the slick now dripping from your legs. He rubs your folds with the head, teasing you.

“Fucking do it,” you beg, as he bites your lip.

So he did. All at once he shoved into you, his mouth catching your moan again. Your mouth hung open as you panted with his thrusts. His fingers found your clit and rubbed circles. It felt so good. So urgent.

“Oh-oh sh-shit I’m gonna come.”

“Yeah, come on my cock. Come.” He sped up his thrusts and his circles, nipping at your nipples again. You came, Bucky’s hand reaching up to cover your mewls as his tongue and teeth continued their work on your nipples.

When you came down from your high finally, you lazily look down at the man holding you up. “Your turn soldier. What do you want?”

You felt his hard cock twitch inside you. “Ride me.” He carefully walked backwards to his bed sitting down then laid back all the way. You felt every inch of him sink deeper inside you in slow motion. You started to move slowly, savor the feeling, but he wasn’t having it. He bucked his hips, impaling you all the way, making your eyes roll back. “Yeah, take my cock.” Bucky grips your hips hard, moving them at a pace he sets.

“Fuck just like that.” He pulls his hands off your hips and finds your breasts again. You keep his pace as he caresses your breasts and pulls at your nipples relentlessly. Your hips buck with the sensations. “So close, Y/n.”

Your body shakes at his words, unraveling around him again. “Shit I’m-I’m coming, Bucky.”

His hips stutter up into you. You feel him fill you and you ride it out as long as you can stand.

When you finally slide off of him, he offers you his shoulder.

“Fuck, I hope you get that job.”

#bucky one shot #bucky barnes one shot #Bucky Barnes #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes smut #bucky smut #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x reader smut #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes x you #short hair bucky

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injusticeff · 6 years ago

Text

Chapter Twenty-Four

Dom

We both snorted a fine line of the white powder simultaneously, laying back on the couch as the euphoric feeling began to kick in.

I tossed my head back, the feeling of ecstasy overwhelming my body as my eyes fluttered closed and I allowed myself to succumb to the high I was receiving. There wasn't a better feeling in this world other than sex, and even that was a close call.

Feeling my phone buzz in my pocket, I quickly fished it out since I had been expecting a call from Arion any minute now but instantly rolled my eyes once I saw Katya's name flash across the screen. Now that she had helped me win my case, I didn't really feel the need to entertain her anymore. One, she was a married woman and brought that fact up every time we got together, and two, I had just gotten bored with her.

Of course, the sex with her was good but at the same time, sex is just sex. I could easily find another person with good sex and a personality so I wasn't pressed over her.

"When that nigga gon' call you?" My friend complained from the seat beside me, breaking me away from my thoughts as I looked over to see him staring at me with an unamused expression on his face.

I subconsciously checked my phone once again, but the only thing residing in my notifications was the missed call I had just received not even a minute ago. Shrugging in response, I prepared myself to snort another line as Ray just shook his head at me in annoyance. "I ain't chasing down no grown ass man to see when he's gonna call me. Be patient, he's my nigga and all but he's not to be fucked with."

Silence took over the conversation soon after my reply and I took that as my cue to use the rolled up hundred dollar bill to inhale the next line of the pure white powder sitting on the table in front of me. The feeling that invaded my body was almost heavenly; like I was on a cloud higher than nine. It was like I could literally feel my pupils dilating.

"Alright nigga, slow down with that shit. We're not gonna be able to do this job you want done if you're too high to know what's going on." Ray spoke just as I felt the hundred dollar bill get snatched out of my hand causing me to glare at him with flared nostrils.

I knew he was right but one thing that I didn't tolerate was disrespect; I don't care who you thought you were. Snatching the blue-faced bill right back out of his hand, my icy stare remained on him for a few more seconds before my phone began vibrating loudly. I reluctantly broke eye contact with him and stuffed the Benjamin in the pocket of my jeans before quickly sliding my finger across my phone screen to answer the incoming call from Arion.

"Yo?" I answered as my eyes unwillingly became lower the longer I held them in place. It probably looked as if I was about to fall asleep when really, I was feeling better than ever.

Ever since I had came back from the rehabilitation center, the highs that usually hadn't done enough for me before were the same ones that would now have me on my ass. That tolerance break shit was actually true and it made me want to do it more often if it weren't for all of the horrible withdrawal symptoms that came along with it.

"Meet me at the spot." Arion's demanding voice came through the speakers of my phone before he hung up. I knew he couldn't say too much more so that he wouldn't be linked to what I was about to do and he also didn't want to give away too many details since I already knew what and where the spot was.

Turning to Ray, I tapped him twice to get his attention before nodding over to the unmarked car that he had arrived in, signaling him that it was time to go. He quickly got up and cleaned off any trace of the cocaine we had been previously snorting from the table before we both began to make our way over to the vehicle.

Although I had been more fucked up, I had to drive due to Arion not trusting many people to know where his warehouse was located. He was very particular about who could and couldn't know his whereabouts, especially after the situation with Tiarra.

The drive there was quick, taking no longer than twenty minutes before we pulled into the lot of the abandoned looking warehouse with all of the windows tightly boarded up and the grass out in front overgrown and unkempt. "You sure this the place?" Ray asked, his face scrunched up as he took in the sight of the building. There weren't any cars but ours outside and all that could be heard was the sound of mother nature.

"Get out nigga." I answered as I shut off the car and tossed him the keys before climbing out with him following suit after a bit of hesitation. I couldn't lie and say that I wasn't weirded out too since usually there might be a car or two parked maybe a block away, but this is where I was told to meet him so I continued my trek up to the front door of the structure.

Knocking in a specific rhythm, the door creaked open not even a second later and I did a quick glance back at my friend, informing him with my facial expression to just follow my lead. The both of us stepped inside and were greeted with a tall suited man with sunglasses on as if he was a part of the Men in Black. I wanted to ask him if he knew that he was inside but bickering with a seven foot dude wasn't what I came here for and I had bigger things to handle today.

The male never uttered a word as he led us throughout the building, leaves and gravel that had been swept inside by the wind over the years crunching underneath our feet. We turned the corner and as we came up on the first door, the obvious bodyguard stepped aside as his eyes remained straight ahead of him instead of at us. "He's in there." His deep voice echoed through the vacant hallways, the first time I had heard him speak since we've been here.

Grabbing ahold of the rusted doorknob, I gave it a slight twist causing the heavy metal door to swing open, revealing Arion who sat at a desk inside of a room that looked like it was the only one that had been refurbished since this place had went out of business years ago. Ray and I stepped inside, the door instantly slamming shut behind us causing him to jump and look back to see that we had been closed into the room.

Arion's face read expressionless as he glanced from me to Ray then back at me before a grin suddenly broke out on his face. "My nigga." He finally spoke, standing from his seat to reach over and dap me up before averting his attention over to my plus one. "Who's this?"

"Don't worry, you can trust him. This is my boy Ray. He's helping me with the little dilemma I've been telling you about." I replied as Ray immediately reached out to shake Arion's hand and after a bit of hesitation, Arion returned the gesture.

He sat back in his seat as one of his eyebrows raised in curiosity. "Yo baby moms?"

"Yea, after we went to court and everything, I had him follow her to find out where she was staying and can you guess who she was staying with?"

Arion let out a low chuckle and shook his head. "Another nigga?"

"Another fucking nigga." I had barely allowed him to finish before I was answering my own question, beginning to seethe just talking about it. "I'm sick and tired of this bullshit. I go through all that shit to off the lil' boyfriend she thought she had before and the first thing she does is go hop under another nigga? I'm starting to think these niggas aren't the ones that's the problem."

Arion moved his head from side to side in amusement as he raised from his seat once again, but this time making his way over to a large cabinet like area and swinging open the door to reveal a large black duffel bag. "Maybe the problem was never the niggas to begin with." He retorted after a few seconds of silence before turning back around to us and nodding over to the bag. "That's gon' have everything y'all need and I mean everything. And if y'all get caught—"

"I know, I know. I never heard of you."

He gave me a slight nod before glaring at Ray who hadn't said anything since we stepped into the warehouse. "That goes for you too lil' nigga." Arion added, his tone menacing and laced with suspicion at Ray's silence.

"Oh! No—yea, I know. If we get caught, I don't know shit. I'm not 69." He replied quickly, referencing the rapper who had been getting the jokes all over Twitter for snitching so he could lessen his sentence.

Arion seemed satisfied with the answer, allowing us to head over to the duffel bag and take a look inside. Guns were the first items that had came into view once we pulled the zipper open, the various black metals shining against the lighting from inside of the room. Of course, he hooked us up with untraceable bullets which was an addition that I had to pay a pretty penny for but knew that it was worth the extra money put in.

Closing up the bag, I looked back at Arion with a satisfied smirk. "I appreciate this. Hopefully this will be the last time that I gotta do some shit like this." I tossed the strap of the large black bag over my shoulder before dapping him up once again and exiting the building with Ray in tow.

***

Ray and I sat outside of the light bright nigga's house where Simone had been staying ever since she left her last boyfriend's place. She was smart not to stay there, I'll give her that much because I checked the home a few times to be sure that she hadn't moved back in and each time, I had came up empty.

It was hard to track someone who had cut off all communication with you so taking her to court was the only way that I could figure out her whereabouts for the last month and a half.

The lights were on in the house letting me know that there were people inside as we had waited for the perfect opening to execute my plan. All of this shit was going to end today, whether Simone liked it or not. I was officially done with the back and forth that we were doing; it was all becoming too tiring for me.

Ray tapped my arm causing me to break away from my thoughts and look over at him just as he pointed towards the house, his eyes never wavering from it. My eyes then followed suit and I noticed there had been two people hovering near the front door that was now open. I couldn't see much but movement yet since it had been growing darker outside, but I was sure that the two figures were a male and a female.

They hugged for a little longer than one would normally hug someone before exchanging some inaudible words as the woman raised to her tip-toes to place a light kiss on the male's cheek. She then began to walk towards a cab that was parked on the side of the road, tugging a large suitcase along with her as she neared closer to one of the street lights that had came on some time ago.

A smirk immediately played on my features as the lighting illuminated her face, allowing me to see exactly who now looked like she was leaving the home—and by herself too. This was almost too perfect. I turned back to Ray and gave him a slight nod as an answer to the questioning stare he was now giving me.

"Get ready."

Bree

Placing a light peck on Xae’s cheek, he grabbed me gently by my neck and pulled me down to press his lips against mine as they moved in sync together. I loved that he never just settled for a kiss on the cheek; he wanted to feel my lips on his own.

I smirked into the kiss and placed a few more pecks on his lips before slowly pulling away, a look of admiration playing on my features just from seeing how handsome he was. His lips were soft and moist, his brown eyes were decorated with gorgeous eyelashes, and his freckles coated his face sexily. He was damn near perfect.

"I'll be back baby." I spoke as I pressed one last kiss to his lips before grabbing my phone and my purse off of the counter. "My cousin wants to meet for lunch to talk about her role in the wedding. Since it's moved up, a lot of people weren't able to clear their schedules for it in time."

I turned back around to see him shrugging his shoulders nonchalantly. "I don't really care about having a huge wedding, I just want you to be my wife and have my baby already."

A small smile graced my face as I approached him once more, wrapping my arms around his neck and sensually pressing my lips against his pair. "I love you. So much."

"I love you too, baby." He responded with a light pat to my ass. "Now, hurry up so that you can come back to me. I'm gonna be bored over here."

I slightly rolled my eyes, knowing that the only reason he wanted me to hurry back was because Simone had left earlier so the house would be practically empty with me gone. I'm not sure why she left so suddenly but I wasn't going to complain either. Xae and I finally had the house to ourselves again and we didn't have to walk on eggshells to appease to anyone else.

Hiking my purse onto my shoulder, I waved goodbye to him before exiting out of the house and making my way over to our car. As I approached the window, I did a quick check on my appearance and fixed my hair up a bit. My attire was pretty basic; a simple black off-the-shoulder shirt tucked into some light washed high waisted jeans, compliment by some black sandals that showcased my freshly pedicured feet. My hair was down and framed my face perfectly.

After feeling satisfied with how I looked, I opened up the car door and hopped into the driver's seat, immediately igniting the engine as I threw my seatbelt on. Being that my destination was only a short distance away, I decided not to hook my phone up to the aux and instead listened to whatever was on the radio.

It was beginning to get a bit darker outside, the sky flowing with pretty colors as the sun started to set. Once I arrived at the designated house, I grabbed my purse and shut off the car before using my phone to let that person know that I was there. I didn't feel like standing outside and waiting, especially since it was getting dark.

The door swung open before I even got the chance to climb up the stairs to the front porch, revealing Antonio who had wore an expressionless face. He stepped aside and I took that as my cue to walk inside of his home, immediately making my way towards the living room since he had called me here to talk.

Once inside of the room, I reached over to give him a short hug which he quickly declined by pushing me back causing my eyebrows to instantly furrow in confusion at his sudden aggression since the last time we had seen each other. "What's your problem?" I spat, getting a bit defensive from his use of force.

"Who's baby are you carrying, Bree?" He retorted simply, his tone calm although I could tell that he was anything but.

I was a bit caught off guard by the question. "Wh-What?"

He smacked his lips, giving me a knowing look. "Don't act fucking dumb, you heard me. Who's baby are you carrying?" He repeated.

"Why the fuck are you coming at me like that when you were the one that told me to come—"

"I don't give a fuck 'bout none of that." He quickly cut me off, not bothering to hear what I had to say which caused me to scrunch up my face. "All I wanna know is if that baby is mine or not 'cause it seems like Xae thinks it's his and you're not about to be having the both of us playing father to the same child. So I'm gonna ask you one more time, whose baby are you carrying."

His tone was stern and serious making me sigh as I hung my head low, running my hands through my hair from all of the stress this whole pregnancy thing had been putting on me. "Look, I don't know, okay? But I'm ninety percent sure that it's yours. It's the only thing that makes sense. I started getting all of the symptoms a couple of weeks after we first... you know."

Antonio let out a low chuckle as he shook his head. "Do you hear yourself? You sound so fucking childish, you can't even say that we had sex. We fucked. And you're gonna sit here and tell me I'm the father to that baby then go and tell Xavier the same thing? Well, it's either he's the dad or I am. You can't have it both ways, Bree. So I'm gonna need you to fucking find out."

"It's not my fault! I kept feeling sick and throwing up, he was bound to notice and be suspicious. I tried telling him that it was food poisoning at first but food poisoning doesn't last an entire week, Antonio. I had to tell him something so I showed him the pregnancy test that I took. He just... found out." I retorted, mumbling the last part of my rant in a barely audible tone as I began to fidget with my fingers underneath his gaze.

His glare was cold and I could practically feel the anger exuding off of him. I knew he cared about this baby but his reaction to me being pregnant was nothing compared to Xae's. If Xae found out that the baby wasn't really his, he'd be crushed. I don't think I could do that to him or see the look on his face when he found out; that would break me.

"You keep saying it's not your fault, but it is. It's both of our faults and the longer you wait to tell him, the harder it's gonna be. So, either you tell him or I will but I'm not going to stand there at this man's wedding knowing what I know." He folded his arms across his chest as if to signify how serious he was about what he had said.

My heartbeat quickened and I started to panic, pacing the floor as my hands stressfully ran through my bone straight hair. "How am I supposed to tell him something like that? That I had sex with his friend and got pregnant? What do you expect me to say?!"

"THE FUCKING TRUTH!" He raised his voice for the first time since I had been there, his face beginning to turn a red tint due to how angry he had become. "I'm tired of lying to this man to protect you!"

I scrunched up my face, my head pulling back quickly in defense. "Me?! You're protecting yourself! You forgot that you're a part of this too, not just me." I screamed back as I roughly shoved my pointer finger into his chest. "And you need to stop hanging around him like you're his friend when you know what went down between us. You're making things worse."

"Oh, so now this is all my fault because I started being friends with him? You were the one who was in a fucking relationship but came to my restaurant kissing up on me when y'all were having issues. Now that y'all are good, you're trying to push that to the side like it never happened and move on with your life but newsflash: you can't. One, we just fucked again last week and two, you may or may not be carrying my kid. If anything, you're making things worse." He retorted, more livid than I had ever seen anyone before.

Rolling my eyes in annoyance, I crossed my arms over my chest and turned away from him, my back now facing him. I heard him smack his lips once again from behind me then began hearing his heavy footsteps walking away from me causing me to quickly turn back around. "Where are you going?"

"I'm not about to talk to you if all you're gonna do is act like a child. Just remember what I said. You can see yourself out." One of his hands swung back and forth in his attempts to wave me off, but I quickly made my way over to him and pushed him from behind. His head swiftly swung to face me which caused his body to be pulled along with it. "The fuck is your problem?!"

"Don't walk away from me when I'm talking to you Antonio. You know, you used to act so sweet but now I see that, that was all it was. An act." I gritted out, my head shaking in disappointment that I really fell for all the bullshit that he used to tell me before he got into my pants. It was like his personality took a whole 180° turn after that day.

I had never seen this side to him before. Hell, he made it seem like this side of him was nonexistent with the things we used to talk about. And like a dumb ass, I fell for it. He prayed on me and my vulnerability in my relationship because he knew there were problems between Xae and I. He strove off of that alone.

"Yo, Bree." He let out a hasty breath, pinching the bridge of his nose with his first two fingers. "Get the fuck out my face because I swear—"

"You swear what?!" I quickly cut him off, just daring him to finish his attempt to threaten me.

Removing his hand from his face, he stared at me in disbelief for a few seconds before pushing past me and heading towards the front door, roughly swinging it open as he stood off to the side. "Get out. And decide what you wanna do because I'm done playing these back and forth games with you."

I watched his body language, noticing that he was dead serious about kicking me out of his house. My feet stomped back over to the living room and I angrily snatched my purse up, making my way out of the house without so much as a glance his way.

If he wanted to be that way, then fine. Neither me nor my baby needs him or anything he had to offer. I was better off with Xae to begin with, I don't know why I thought the grass would be greener on the other side of the fence.

"This baby is Xae's whether you like it or not!" I called out to him, refusing to turn around and give him anymore attention.

"Yea, whatever." I heard him mumble before the front door slammed shut and I quickly hopped into the car, not even bothering to put on a seatbelt or check anything before I pulled off.

The tires screeched as the car quickly reversed back into the street all too suddenly, consequently making me run into a fire hydrant that had been on the opposite sidewalk on the other side of the street.

All of the frustration had been building up inside of me and wrecking the car was the final straw for me as my hands roughly punched at the steering wheel. "FUCK!" I let out a blood-curdling scream as I thought about all of the possible ways I'd be able to explain what happened to our car to my fiancé.

"I am in so much fucking trouble..."

Xae

I should be happy.

I got a baby on the way and in a month, I’m getting married to the woman I’ve loved for nearly three years. So why am I feeling like a part of me is missing something?

I knew that she was going to have to some time but for some reason, I didn't want her to leave. Especially to just pack up and move so suddenly like that after everything that's happened lately. I'm not even sure if I'd be able to trust her alone by herself because I don't want something to happen and I'm not there to help her like last time.

At the same time though, I do want her to learn how to be able to help herself. Through all of the talking we've done during our late night smoke sessions, I realized how dependent she was on other people and I fucked up by making myself another person that she wanted to depend on.

Don't get me wrong, it's good to have other people to depend on at certain moments when you need it but not all the time because people aren't always reliable in that sense. Anyone could switch up in the blink of an eye and leave you without a thing to your name.

So I'm proud that she left to be out on her own for once, but I also didn't want her to... I was so conflicted.

I scrolled through the various shows and movies on my Netflix account while simultaneously checking my phone for the text that Simone had told me she would give me once she was settled in at her hotel room. She had a job interview tomorrow morning at a warehouse across the street from the hotel and although warehouse jobs usually required heavy lifting and long hours, they paid good money. If she got the job, she'd be starting off at $13 an hour.

I also let her know that if she ever needed any help, not to hesitate and call me. I don't want her to be dependent anymore but I don't want her pride to be too high to ask for help when she really needed it either.

It still felt unreal that she was actually gone after over a month of living with Bree and I.

***Flashback***

Hearing shuffling coming from Simone's bedroom, my heart immediately dropped as I hopped out of my bed and rushed out into the hallway, wasting no time in busting her door open only to see her packing up her clothes.

She was definitely startled by my outburst but I, on the other hand, let out a sigh of relief once I saw that she was alright. That relief quickly turned into confusion, though, as I furrowed my eyebrows and hastily stepped further into the room. "What are you doing?"

"I'm leaving Xae." My face instantly scrunched up at her words which caused her to let out a low sigh. "Bree made me realize that it's not right to keep leeching off of you or anyone else for that matter. I'm just going to be on my own for a while—"

I immediately cut her off once I processed her words, growing angry that Bree had been so set on kicking this girl out in her time of need. I mean, I knew she felt that Simone had overstayed her welcome but damn; show some compassion at least. "So Bree's the one that put you up to this? Simone, I told you that she's just—"

"No." She quickly shook her head and halted her packing to give me her full attention, stepping a bit closer to me so that we were now face-to-face. "She didn't tell me that she wanted me to go but she made me realize that I needed to."

There was a sudden silence in the conversation as my eyebrows came together in even more confusion. "What? Why...?"

"Because Xae, I'm sick of intruding on people's lives and only making things worse for not only them, but myself too. I'm sick of having nothing to my name but the clothes on my back that ironically, I still didn't buy myself. I'm sick of letting Dominick have control over me simply because I keep allowing him to. I'm just done... and I'm tired. I lost one child and I'll be damned if I lose the other to him. If I give up now, Junior might turn into another Dom by just watching the shit he does. I've kept him sheltered from it but now that I'm not there, I just know that Dom isn't filtering what he does in front of him. My baby has too much of a good heart to become lost to the streets like Dominick has. And I'd die before I ever let that happen. So I just... I have to go."

She turned around to walk back over to her suitcase but stopped short once I swiftly grabbed her hand, pulling her back towards me. "But I can help you! I told you that, you don't need to do this on your own."

"That's just it Xae. I can never do things for myself and look where that's gotten me. I'm staying with a man I haven't spoken to since high school and his fiancé. I can never see Junior again because I lost full custody for not having a stable income or place to call my home. I just feel so pathetic right now. But I'm not gonna try and take the easy way out this time." She spoke with conviction, giving me a slight nod.

I still wanted to tell her that I'm always here and that she didn't need to leave to find a job or look for a new place to live. She could still stay with me where I could watch over her and make sure that she's ok. My mind was running a mile a minute with things I wanted to say to her but I just couldn't form the words correctly.

The palm of her hand gently rested on my chin as she instantly brought my attention back down to her, as if she had sensed that my mind was elsewhere. I had been so in my head that I hadn't even noticed the tears cascading from her eyes. Both of my hands trailed upwards to cup her face, wiping her tears away with the pad of my thumb but to no avail; fresh ones just kept falling back down. "Please don't cry..."

"I'm not crying because I'm sad Xae." She chuckled out through her tears, her hand gently caressing my cheek as she looked up at me through her watery eyes. "I'm crying because I'm happy. I'm so glad that I was able to find a friend in you again after all these years. If it weren't for you, I'd probably be dead right now and I love you for that. You're there for me regardless of what anyone says or thinks and I honestly really needed that at that time in my life." She grabbed my hands from her face and held onto them tightly, a small smile playing on her features as she closed her eyes and brushed her cheek against the back of one of them. "But now, I need you to let me go."

Those words stung and the fact that she had dropped my hands right after her statement hurt even more. I knew that things were beginning to get complicated but now, more than ever, it was hard to just let her leave like that. I couldn't just let her go without knowing if I would be able to see her again. "Well... can you at least come to my wedding next month? It would really make me happy to be able to see you there."

Her eyes raised to the ceiling as if she was thinking before she gave me a playfully knowing look. "Are you kidding? Of course I will." The smile that formed on my face was so bright, I knew my cheeks would start hurting if it went on any longer than fifteen seconds.

Suddenly, she wrapped her arms around my torso and buried the side of her face into my chest, holding onto me tightly as my arms soon formed around her own body. "Thank you for everything. I'll never forget what you've done for me Xavier."

Her gaze then shifted back upwards so that she had a clear view of my face, a few tears of my own brandishing my skin. She leaned up and puckered her lips before planting a light kiss on my cheek and pulling away to finally get back to packing her clothes.

"Do you wanna help me? I know I don't have much but I just—I wanna spend a little more time with you before I go, if that's ok."

I quickly wiped my tears and nodded, going over to the side of the bed where a small pile of her clothes were waiting to be folded and packed into her suitcase. I looked over at her busying herself with folding a long black jumpsuit.

"Simone?" Her gaze tore away from the article of clothing and over to me with a raised eyebrow. "I'm really proud of you."

***Flashback ends***

There wasn't a doubt in my mind that she could do whatever she put her mind to. She was smart and determined and after all that she's been through, hopefully had wonderful karma coming her way.

Checking the time on my phone, I furrowed my eyebrows once I realized that it was almost ten o'clock and decided to dial Bree's number to see what was taking her so long. A part of me was actually concerned and the other part was just bored out of my mind, hating how silent the house had become without the both of them here.

The phone rang all the way through until her voicemail began to play through the speakers of my phone causing me to roll my eyes. "Yo, call me back when you get this message. I'm starting to get worried about you." With that, I ended the call and went back to scrolling through the Netflix app on my TV, not being able to find anything that caught my eyes.

As I scrolled, I heard the front door unlock from my bedroom and realized that was probably the reason she hadn't picked up the phone since she had already been in the neighborhood. "Next time, that ass better pick up my call!" I playfully called out to her, earning only silence in response causing me to furrow my eyebrows. "Bree?"

My eyes averted over towards my bedroom door and I moved to stand up to check on her until I saw two masked figures standing in the doorway. I froze in my spot for a couple of seconds before attempting to dart over to my dresser where I kept a gun that not even Bree knew about. She was too squeamish about those kinds of things and claimed she didn't like violence, but I always wanted to be able to protect myself.

The two individuals swiftly moved towards me, yanking me away before I got the chance to grab my pistol and wrestled me until one of them held my arms behind my back in a tight grasp.

"Bitch ass nigga!" I heard the one in front of me scream before he sent a hard blow to my stomach, immediately knocking the wind out of me as I struggled to get out of the other male's hold. The intruder in front of me began to send punch after punch to my face and abdomen, not stopping until I could see my own blood now dropping onto the floor in large puddles.

One of my eyes had became swollen during the beating and the guy behind me let go of my arms causing me to instantly hit the ground, beaten badly and feeling like I'd vomit my stomach out any second now. "What the hell are you doing?!" I heard one of them say causing me to look up at the two of them standing over my bruised body with my good eye.

"I want him to see the face of the nigga that's ‘bout to kill him." The intruder immediately snatched off his mask, revealing Dominick. The same person I had went to high school with all those years ago and the same person Simone had been running from for months. I wanted to strangle this nigga with my bare hands but after the beating he just gave me, I was too weak to even stand up. "You wanna fuck on my baby momma, you gon' have to go through me. Yellow ass nigga."

I slightly winced as my eyebrows furrowed. "But we never f—"

I was cut off by two gunshots going off and a burning sensation shooting throughout my body as the two men quickly ran out of my bedroom. Blood had now stained my floors as I struggled to drag myself over to my bed and grab my phone to call for help. My eyesight began to become blurry and my muscles weak as I reached for my phone, my fingers roughly sending it crashing to the floor.

Once it was in my grasp, I clicked the emergency call button which instantly dialed 911. The dispatcher could soon be heard on the line as I struggled to speak through the blood that I was starting to choke on. "He—Help." I squeaked out lowly.

That was all I managed to get out before I lost all consciousness.

#chris brown ff #saweetie #urban ff #chris brown #chrisbrown #saweetie ff #injusticeff #cb

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darley1101 · 6 years ago

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Death & Decorum Part 1: She Wants Revenge

Welcome to Death and Decorum, a 6 part miniseries that I will be posting throughout the month of October. As the title suggests it is not a love story, but one of revenge. I have done some interesting research over the last day or so and will advise you that some of the deaths depicted in this story are rather interesting and based off actual deaths that occurred in Regency England. I am very well aware that this is not going to be everyone's cup of tea, which is why I will only be tagging people who requested to be tagged by liking, reblogging, or commenting on this story's coming soon post. If you would like to be added to the tag, or even taken off, let me know. Full credit for this idea goes to @choiceslife

Warning/Triggers: Vengeful killings, mention of poison, drowning, broken neck

Death and Decorum

Part One: She Wants Revenge

Dusk was starting to fall as an unmarked carriage rolled to a stop just outside a small, out of the way apothecary. “You know what to do,” the countess ordered in a cold, distant voice. The dark haired girl sitting across from her gave a curt nod, her brown eyes shamefully studying the floor. “This is for the goods,” she pressed a coin in the girl's hand. “And this,” she jingled a small, nondescript pouch, “is for you. Twelve pieces of silver. Rather fitting don't you think?” She let out a low, emotionless chuckle when the girl's cheeks blossomed with color.

“I'm no Judas,” the girl whispered, greedily snatching the purse from the countess' fingers. “The only reason I'm doing this is my family-”

“Whatever helps you sleep at night. Now, do be a dear and fetch me what I've asked.” Eyes the color of a winter sky right before a storm bore into the girl, reminding her that the countess was not one to be trifled with. “Don't dally. I still need to dress for dinner.”

“Yes, Your Grace.” The girl gathered the dark skirt of her uniform and reluctantly climbed from the carriage. The Countess watched, a cold smile stretching across her berry stained lips, as the girl entered the shoppe. It hadn't taken much to turn the girl. Word of an ailing father and the promise of silver had been all it took. Judas. Briar. Both had sold their loyalty for twelve pieces of silver and both would have innocent blood on their hands.

It rained, which was only fitting since it matched the raw, coldness building inside Rebecca Young. The sharp, skin piercing drizzle that stabbed at the world, painting it a melancholy gray, also provided the perfect cover for the tears she was incapable of producing. It was a pity, really. She wanted so desperately to feel something other than the icy hatred that was starting to course through her veins. She wanted to be the sort of daughter that dropped to her knees beside the yawning hole where her father's coffin was being lowered, screaming against the injustice of his death. To give into such urges wouldn't be ladylike, so like the good little puppet she'd become she stood quietly between the caterwauling form of her dear, dear step-mother and the sniffling mouse who clung to the arm of the countess' stoic faced son. 'The evil trifecta,' Rebecca thought bitterly. The murderous widow putting on a marvelous show of grief, the tittering twit who was too busy gathering juicy tidbits to gossip about with her betters to realize she was naught but a pawn in game she couldn't possibly win, or the mindless drone who willingly did his mother's bidding no matter how heinous the request. If it were one of those Gothic novels that were so popular, there would be a tragic heroine desperately trying to escape their nefarious clutches. Perhaps that was Rebecca's role. The grieving bastard child, too concerned with whether or not she would be tossed on the streets to properly grief. 'Never,' she curled her lips in disdain, 'I will never accept that role.'

Squaring her slender shoulders, Rebecca raised her chin a notch, her thick sooty lashes lowering over her light brown eyes while she forced herself to focus on the words coming out of the vicars mouth rather than comparing her life to the plot of tragic tale. “Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil for thou art with me, thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.” The words struck a familiar chord, one buried deep beneath the gentile facade she'd carefully cultivated to please a grandmother whose love only extended as far as Rebecca's ability to procure a suitable match. For the last month she had stumbled through her own valley of death, letting the nobility slaughter any trace of the village girl that had arrived at Edgewater with a naive excitement shining in her eyes. There had been no comfort, no rod or staff to protect her, while she struggled to win the approval of a father whose life had been stolen by his inconsolable widow. Turning her head slightly, several strands of dark hair sticking to her cheek, Rebecca pierced her step-mother with a venomous look. 'From here on out I shall fear no evil,' she silently hissed, 'and you shall cower before me as I will become Edgewater's very own shadow of death. Vengeance shall have a name and that name shall be Rebecca.'

.“...and said, naked came I out of my mother's womb, and naked I shall return thither; the Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away...”

Rebecca pursed her lips into a tight, grayish blue tinged pucker to keep from yelling. 'Liar! Filthy, filthy liar!' The Lord had given Father life, had blessed Rebecca with his affections for three glorious weeks, but the Almighty surely hadn't taken him away. His life had been stolen, wrung from his body with a poison served up by a 'loving' wife. Rebecca would give the Countess her due; she'd chosen carefully, selecting a poison that mimicked the dreaded yellow fever. 'And now she plays the part of grieving widow', Rebecca internally sneered. 'She's allowed her desperation to turn her into a novel cliché, a desperate villianess willing to sacrifice the innocent in her quest to hold on to something that was never meant to be hers.' The greatest tragedy, was Rebecca would have cared for her like a mother had the viper but shown her an ounce of affection. Instead, the countess had let her own diabolical nature twist even the smallest kindness into a sinister ploy.

“We know not why these tragedies occur.”

The lie slid easily off the tongue of the vicar. If not for the man's love of his own voice, the burial would have already concluded, father planted in the ground. Instead, the vicar continued to spoon feed deceitful words of comfort that allowed the countess to continue her theatrical display, while Rebecca could practically feel the black crepe dress her grandmother insisted she wear starting to melt. The light weight silk wasn't meant for such dampness, nor were the jet embellished slippers she wore beneath it. Not that the countess cared. She had ignored propriety by wearing a rich velvet gown designed to show case her bosom, which heaved mightily with each over exaggerated sob, and hugged her other physical assets. It was humiliating. Bad enough she was going to get away with murdering father but had she not class? Could she not at least put on a good performance and appropriately dress the part? Rebecca's fingers twisted in the delicate lawn handkerchief her grandmother had insisted she openly carry. Appearances, even in death, must be upheld. 'Unless you're the countess, then you ignore propriety in favor of dressing like some Drury lane doxy. It's alright of course, she's a grieving widow.'

“Can you believe her, that dress is absolutely scandalous,” someone behind them whispered. “I'm surprised the Dowager allowed her out in such a dress.”

“It's bait for the next one, no doubt,” another whispered. “I heard the Earl left everything to his bastard.”

Sucking in her cheeks, Rebecca bit down on the delicate flesh. The sharp pain and the coppery taste of blood were a perfect distraction from the drawing room gossip that was starting to seep into the memorial. Turning on them, demanding that they show some respect, would shift the focus off her step mother and onto herself. Aside from the one painfully true smear about her birth, the gossip was centered on the countess and Rebecca would like to keep it that way.

“Worry about her dress all you like, my concerns lie in whether or not she's contagious. If what I've heard is true, she spent every moment in his sick room. Mark my words, we'll be burying her next.”

The truth burned on Rebecca's tongue, begging to be released. She held it in, knowing her words would fall on deaf ears. With the exception of her grandmother, the rest of the world believed that her father truly had somehow contracted and succumbed to the yellow fever. And while it was doubtful that the countess had spent more than a passing moment by her ailing husband's side, that wasn't what society believed. Poor, devoted countess. Twas a pity that poison wasn't contagious. 'It could be,' a voice whispered in her ear. 'No one would question it. They're already suspecting it. Why not give them what they want?'

Tag List (To be added or removed simply comment, reblog, or message) @tmarie82 @zackzilberg @damienazariostan @leelee10898 @clarissafics @hopefulmoonobject @brightpinkpeppercorn @mrsernestsinclaire @dancetothestoriesinyoursoul @classychoicesworld @writtenbycandy @too-poor-to-buy-keys @ehkw1989 @claramillstakenalready @never-ending-choices @bobasheebaby @choiceslife @nekkidmolerat @blackcatkita @katurrade @indiacater @boneandfur @give-me-ernest-sinclaire @jadedpixiescribbles @llamasgrl @hellospunkiebrewster @tornbetween2loves (sorry for the ones whose tags are not working.)

#choices desire and decorum #desire and decorum mc #darley1101 writes

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blueyemxn · 6 years ago

Text

Protector of Man

Chapter One: Last Man Standing

Notes: So this is like the fourth try in doing this fan fiction, but I think this might be the start of something I actually finish considering how enjoyable the third game was and I’m excited at the fact that a fourth and fifth could be in the possible future. I’ll be posting this on Ao3 as well under the name Blueyedemoness.

WarxOC (Platonic/Possible Romance in the future)

Warning: Foul language, PTSD, blood, gore, violence, angst, and fluff.

The glare from the sun reflecting off the metal was dull and undignified. There were scratches and uneven groves planted across the surface, painting a clear sign that the weapon had been used many times through its creation. Mari almost felt bad taking it from the hands of its’ owner, but the demon had been dead for a while and she needed something to protect herself. It hadn’t even been more than a couple of days since she emerged from her dreamless sleep and she had seen more demons then she thought she ever would in her lifetime. Before they were a myth her parents talked about to keep her and her sister in line, but now she was forced admit that that wasn’t true anymore.

There is a demon at 10 o’clock. A voice that could only be described as gentle as a light breeze by the most pompous of poets filled the caverns of her mind.

Mari peeked from behind the concrete wall of the partially caved-in building and saw another ugly-faced demon with curled horns stalking around the perimeter. His weapon was identical to hers and many other grunts that stalked the area as his beady eyes scanned the environment.

She stayed crouched with bated breath, not daring to exhale until he was clear of earshot before scrambling to higher ground. ‘Do these guys ever rest?’ she thought to herself as she painstakingly dragged the weapon with her up the surprisingly durable set of stairs. A few wheezes went through her mouth and every few steps she had to pause to catch her breath. Despite the defined muscles attached to her arms, the sword-axe still weighed a ton, more than it should have in her opinion. Though indisputably it was made for demon hands and strength and not for tiny humans who were at the edge of adulthood.

Demons do not require rest and only do so out of luxury.

“Yea, well if they like luxury so much they should go have an orgy or something; I haven’t had an opportunity to go find food since I woke up!” Her stomach growled lightly and Mari took a moment to pause and pat it reassuringly, as if that would do her any good.

Reaching the top of the mostly bare second floor, the young human let go of her weapon and temporarily sat on the frayed carpet next to a rotting wooden desk. She lazily opened some of the drawers in a vain attempt to scrounge anything of use, but ended up with nothing but a few spare papers too faded to be legible and pens that had all but dried out. Useless.

Taking time to rest after going most of the day using her excellent stealth skills to carefully maneuver herself through collapsing buildings, Mari closed her uncovered eye for what seemed like just a few moments. She tried to recall what life used to be before everything went to hell, how life should have been catered to helping her grow up to be an adult. Instead, her mind flashed back to the terrifying moments that haunted her nightmares.

Car alarms blaring, the screams of fellow humans running from the terror, the smell of smoke coming from innumerable amounts of fires caused by the destruction. It suffocated the both of them and running became more difficult as the two had attempted to flee somewhere other than the crowded streets. There was no guaranteed safety from the hideous creatures that were let loose in what seemed to be a premature apocalypse. They tore people apart, ate them and made their bodies nearly unrecognizable before jumping to the next victim with an endless hunger. There was no satiating them and if those dog-like monsters were bad, the humanoid, behemoth demons were even worse. They bellowed out a roar that could destroy eardrums and lifted buses full of people with such ease that Hercules would be put to shame. Instead of hunger, rage was their motivation and the presence of humans seemed to set them off the most. But they were more avoidable then the dog demons at least.

Elsewhere, churches were filled by the dozen, overflowing with so many people the doors seemed to be ready to burst at any moment. Those who couldn’t get in stood outside, hugging the walls and cowering in fear or calling out that the end times were here and humanity was to pay for their sins. Her parents had been part of those people and despite their cries and pleas, Mari turned away and ran in the opposite direction with her sister in tow. She believed the best thing to do was to hide in an obscure place, a place with few humans, few demons and a small space where only they could hide easily and be protected by the towering buildings made of concrete. Olivia had voiced her objections as well, but Mari ignored them just as she had ignored their parents. Olivia was only seven years old and while particularly bright for one her age, she was still only seven years old. Camping at any church or holy place in the city was a death trap and she would be damned to let them hide in such obvious hiding spots. They’d only be waiting to be slaughtered and she refused to die so easily.

They ran for a long time, so long she began to get blisters on her feet. No matter where they turned, demons were there with the few angels that survived the initial collision. Mari had gotten frustrated and, for a split second, thought about going back to the church where their parents were, only to be blocked. Where the road once was, giant thorns erupted from the ground, causing the street to rumble and crack where the helpless humans stood. They had no choice but to go forward now and hope that safety was within reach.

All of a sudden Mari jolted up from her unintentional nap at the sound of something large crashing nearby. Her breath hitched and she had to take a moment to let her panic settle down and her hands to stop trembling. When she came back to her senses, the human slowly rose from behind the desk and peered through one of the broken windows.

Not far off, in one of the few intact parking garages left, a big gaping hole had opened up and smoke rose up from inside. She was reminded of the craters made from the arrival of demons and angels and wondered if these were reinforcements, or something else all together.

“What was that?” asked one of the demons down below in a garbled tongue that she could barely understand, even with Seth’s help.

“More soldiers, probably. Never can have too many under The Destroyer’s command.”

“For what? All the humans are dead now aren’t they? What else could they be here for?”

“Were you even listening? The Earth belongs to Hell now! With this foothold we’ll be able to increase our numbers until we’re ready to storm The White City and squash any angels that are left on this Creator forsaken rock.” They sounded like the typical disgruntled soldiers, but their words were worrying, especially the part talking about all humans being dead. Mari hoped that wasn’t the case, she hoped her sister was still alive somewhere.

Carefully, she slid away from the window and back to where her heavy weapon lay on the tiled floor. Despite fear rising in her stomach, Mari decided that the best course of action was to head where the crash was. She didn’t know why and blamed her lack of logical explanation on her instincts that had been growing more refined as time went on.

The demons are moving away, if you’re going towards that crash, it would be best to go now.

Heeding Seth’s advice and gingerly touching the patch covering her right eye, Mari gripped her weapon in stinging hands and descended out into the destroyed streets.

Navigating without getting caught was one thing, but trying to be stealthy and drag a huge sword-axe the whole way was exhausting and stress inducing. It took everything for her not to scream in frustration whenever it got caught on something or it would slip out of her hands and land on her foot. She wouldn’t have had any trouble if she had some sort of scabbard to hold the damn thing, but she had yet to see anything that could help her achieve that. Thankfully, though, she was almost to her destination.

Once she got closer, Mari started to pick up sounds that bounced off the normally silent, concrete buildings. She slowed down and hugged the wall, creeping towards what she perceived to be a library that towered over most of the other buildings. Her other hand gripped her weapon just in case she needed to use it to defend herself. She then cautiously peered over the corner.

Across the square were groups of green skinned zombies shambling about with the occasional large demon. Most were inactive, but there was a group that was running and charging at something struggling in the middle of them. At first she thought it was another demon, but then noticed this person was fully clothed in armor and when the light hit just right she could see the same color of skin a human wore under the red hood covering the face.

Mari was obviously curious, though not just because he was something other than a demon or angel, but also because his sword was massive. It was nearly the size of his own body and it cut demon and zombie alike as if they were made of paper! She wanted nothing else but to get her hands on it and trace every detail, but reserved herself due to the fact the guy was slaughtering the enemies with no problem and could probably do the same to her if provoked. Instead, she stayed where was.

The stranger was killing everything like it was nothing and a slew of colors would burst out every once in a while to go inside the larger of his two gauntlets. Mari was certainly entertained, so much so that she had completely forgotten that she was utterly starving. She would have been content to watch him work that blade all day, but, alas, all good things must come to an end. Everything in the vicinity had been slaughtered and the stranger put his sword on his back and made his way towards the center of the square.

Mari pulled her head away, not willing to risk exposing herself any longer and gain the stranger’s attention. Unless he had already seen her, he was heading in her direction.

About to shuffle away to possibly find another building closer to the giant, a loud yelp emerged from her throat when a zombie popped out of nowhere and had nearly swiped at her with its’ gnarly claws. She was knocked off balance and hit her back against the brick wall with barely enough time to dodge another attack. Mari kicked it in the legs, causing it to buckle and took that opportunity to get some distance between them. Unfortunately the moment she started to sprint, another appeared and managed to slash at her cheek. She tried to use her weapon, but realized she had dropped it after getting spooked.

“Fuck,” a curse passed through her lips at the realization that she was cornered by two intellectually deprived zombies and only had a small window to turn the situation around. The two lunged at her at almost the same time and Mari dived as far as she could before rolling and getting on her feet. She only got a few seconds, however, before her back was assaulted by two swipes that tore at the back of her hoodie and suddenly found herself on the ground once again.

Primal instincts took hold; Mari flailed her legs against the creatures that were trying to kill her and was met with some success. Her long legs connected with the stomach of one and sent them tumbling away while the other was only slightly hindered; stumbling somewhat before moving forward again. It slashed wildly, but she managed to back away fast enough to dodge it, only to hit the wall of a building seconds later. The teen cursed at herself at her incompetence and braced for a painful impact as the creature charged forward with a hellish screech of a wild animal.

Feeling something being sprayed onto her face was the last thing Mari expected within the next few moments, along with the sound of flesh being pierced and the screeches of the zombie fading away. Daring to take a peek, Mari found herself staring at the end of of a large blade with a niche at the tip snuggled in between the chest cavity of the zombie. She was so stunned into silence that she couldn’t utter the most terrified of squeals or keep her hat from sliding off her head. It felt like her heart just stopped beating and that her death was to come soon after.

“What’s this? A Human?!” said an irritating and grating voice as the blade slipped out of the body with ease. The dead zombie fell to the floor and towering before her was the stranger she had seen earlier, along with an inky black creature floating near him. The creature floated a bit too closely as the black, mouth less face permeated her vision and squinted its’ six glowing eyes. “How unfortunate, it seems to have died from shock.” Its tone mocked her stunned silence and the gall to do so roused her.

“I’m not dead!” Mari proclaimed, baring her teeth before forcing herself up with shaking legs and using the wall to support herself.

“No, you are alive.” The stranger said slowly and clearly, his voice resembling a growl with each word he spoke. Now that he was in front of her, Mari could tell he was at least a few heads taller than the average human male and seemed to be built like a tank with his sturdy armor and beefy appearance. Most of his face was darkened from the inside of his hood, but she could see the long white hair spilling out from inside and white eyes staring down at her. She would have thought he was an angel if he didn’t lack the wings.

A scowl then appeared at his words; was this another attempt to mock her? “No shit Sherlock, I wouldn’t be breathing if I wasn’t!” She told him before wiping her face with the sleeve of her yellow hoodie before looking up at him defiantly.

His face made no visible change from his stoic expression, though she could have sworn that it did twitch for a split second. “I was lead to believe the Third Kingdom was lost.” He said, looking over to his companion as if he owed him an explanation.

“Of course it is! I’m not sure how this little mouth-breather survived, but just because its’ here doesn’t mean Man is saved!” The floating being, or Inky as Mari had immediately started to call him, seemed adamant on his claims, almost suspiciously so.

“If one survived, there could be others.”

Inky scoffed. “You’re wasting your breath on a fantasy! The Charred Council graced you with an opportunity to ‘prove your innocence’ War! Not looking around for humans that don’t exist! I suggest you head back to Vulgrim and ‘feed’ your curiosity before I have to remind you whose in charge.” To prove his point, Inky extended his arm and a blue ring surrounded the one he called War, pinning him to one knee as he grunted in pain. It only lasted a moment, but it was enough to get Mari’s blood boiling.

“What the hell did you do to him?!”

“Just reminding him who holds the leash, wretch. And if I were you, I’d mind your own business lest that tongue of yours get ripped out!” He gave her a threatening glare from all six eyes before collapsing into a mist and retreating to War’s larger gauntlet.

“Are you okay?? What was that bastard’s problem?!” She asked after he had disappeared, unable to understand what had just happened or why, but knew in her gut that it was wrong.

War ignored her questions, though despite his lack of response, she could see him clench one of his fists, only to relax it a few seconds later. He turned his huge body away and began to leave without so much as a single word. And, perhaps, if she were older, Mari would have been content to leave him alone to march on his mission. But she was a stubborn, fiery and determined seventeen year old who needed to look for her little sister and hanging around a guy who could cleave through anything in his path sounded like the best course of action she could take. So she followed him.

They didn’t go far, only to the center of the square where a platform decorated in runes sat and a tall demon floating above it. The skeletal face was unnerving with the lack of a nose, the exposed teeth in an almost permanent grin and beady, cyan eyes watching their every move. Mari kept behind War to keep from the demon’s sight, but she had a feeling he had seen her long before she had seen him.

Without a word spoken between them, War lifted his gauntlet and a blue stream shot out of decapitated skulls that rushed into the demon’s mouth as if guided by an unknown force. The demon gave a satisfied hum.

“Mmm, excellent~~” There was a small pause before she saw him moving to the side slightly until they were both in view of each other. “And what about her?” He asked, daring to get closer to the human and Mari backed away at War’s side, almost pinning herself against him as she tightened her grip on her weapon. “Surely you are aware how much a price a human could offer--”

“I’m NOT for SALE!” Mari’s defiant voice cut him off through the pale imitation of a snarl and she looked ready to lift her weapon to clock him over the head. Even though it was too heavy to lift off the ground for more than a few seconds and she would more likely hurt herself trying, but her only means of defense was making it seem like she could.

“My, my, a tenacious one aren’t we?” the demon sounded all too eager and not the slightest bit put off by her bark.

“Who knows how to get to the Destroyer?” War asked almost impatiently, moving his body to face the demon once again and conveniently putting himself in front of her once more. Whether he did it on purpose or not, Mari wasn’t sure, but was thankful nonetheless.

Forced to comply, Vulgrim left her alone-- for now. “These ancient gates have a mind of their own, but with this, you may reach an… understanding. Beyond the gate, seek out Samael’s prison.” Out of his clawed hands appeared an item that was curved like a horn and had two heads to make up the mouth. War took it without issue and didn’t look back to the demon as he walked towards the large gate blocking the library. “Once, he was close in power to the Dark Prince himself; some would even say a threat. You will find he’s no friend of the Destroyer, and may even help, for a price. Seek me out when you’ve gathered more souls, I’ll make it worth your while~”.

Giving an eerie laugh and grin, Vulgrim slipped back into his portal and War continued on as if he never existed. For a few seconds Mari stared, petrified that he may come back to quickly drag her away at the last second. But found that, at least for now, the demon’s interest in her was gone. Not willing to risk him popping up the moment War left, however, she went after him, heavy weapon in tow, towards the gate blocking the way.

#darksiders #fanfiction #darksiders fanfiction #war #oc #watcher #vulgrim #|| Darksiders Fanfiction

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theasstour · 7 years ago

Photo

(gif credit: harryisart)

Sweet Creature. 02.

7 January 2016: Power goes out.

Pairing: Y/N and Harry (as friends still, loads of flirting tho ;) )

Word count: 4.2k

NB: explicit language, not vegetarian/vegan foods, insane adorableness

Typical. That was the word. It was so fucking typical that your power went out on the coldest day of winter so far this year. It was so fucking typical that it was this Thursday that Nick was supposed to spend with his family in Surrey so you had nowhere to go and would probably freeze to death in your flat. The only way people would know you were gone was by the smell of your corpse after some days of rotting on your sofa, a bag of crisps in your hands probably.

You made your way to the nearest Tesco, knowing that to survive through the night you would need loads of chocolate and probably some strawberries as well. No power meant no proper dinner and you didn’t earn enough yet to live comfortably with take away while living in central North London. You didn’t order take away unless you had been very good at saving up that month, and it was only the beginning of January. You got your strawberries first before you made your way straight to the chocolate, rummaging through the self to see if you found something that screamed out to you. After picking out a few favourites, you thought to yourself that you wanted some other berries or grapes as well. Making your way back to the front of the shop, you walked by an aisle where you thought you saw something familiar, but quickly brushed it off. You looked too much of a mess to meet anyone you knew and feel comfortable enough to stop and talk.

Harry didn’t notice at first, but as he saw the back of your head he blinked a little to himself. It had been a week, and he was starting to hallucinate now? He wanted to see you that bad? Telling himself he was only going crazy and it was those 13 hours of sleep he got last night, he continued on to look through the bread on the shelf before him. It had only been a near-kiss on that New Years party that Nick had thrown, but Harry had found himself really wanting to meet you again. Nick knew exactly the type for Harry, that was why he let Nick and Alexa set him up with loads of people, but there was something different about you. Nick knew it, that was why he had been so eager to introduce you two Harry knew.

You got some healthy snacks and then started walking back toward the cashier, but then you stopped for a second. Looking to your right, you saw a tall, long-haired man with the same coat on that he had worn on New Years Eve. Harry looked right back at you, a furrow to his brow and his sunglasses tangled on top of his head as he took you in. You suddenly felt very exposed. Old joggers on, a fleece jacket, your Nikes on and your hair up away from your face; an absolutely magnificent sight, you thought to yourself.

A warm smile spread over his face, revealing his adorable dimples. “[Y/N].”

You were suddenly ultra-aware of the two bags of crisps you were holding, three bars of chocolate, the pack with strawberries and the bag of cashew nuts. “Hi, Harry.” You said just as the cashew nuts fell to the floor.

“Oh,” Harry stepped forward just as you felt your whole face heat up like you had been standing in front of the sun for 8 hours straight. “Let me help you with that.” Harry took the cashews in his shopping cart and then stared at the rest of your groceries. “Having a party?”

“If by party you mean being all by myself while eating all of this and trying not to freeze to death, then yes, I am having one hell of a party.”

Harry couldn’t help but let a small chuckle go and you felt your heart do something funny at the sound of it. He gestured to the rest of the stuff in your hands before he frowned and looked back into your eyes. You bit your lip at the shiver that went down your spine.

“’Trying not to freeze to death’?” Harry took some of his hair behind his ear. “Your power went out?”

You nodded. “Big parts of North London.”

“I heard about that.” Harry’s fingers were fiddling with his chin as he felt an overwhelming feeling of pity for you and how you obviously seemed to have hit a wall. “So… it’s a crisps-chocolate- strawberries- cashew nuts kind of night then?”

“Obviously.”

Harry smiled a wry smile at how miserable you seemed and looked, and his smile made you smile a little back. You couldn’t even control it.

“How about you come eat dinner at my place? My power is still there and that way you wouldn’t have to freeze to death.” Right after he had suggested that, though, he felt something he hadn’t felt in a long while: nervousness. He had become accustomed to going on stage and performing or going to talk show interviews and so on, but there was something so… real about this. He felt like he had just laid himself completely bare and anxiety started crawling its way forward, making him ramble. “I mean, you don’t have to. If you’d rather stay at your place and not at mine, I wouldn’t mind. But of-of course I want you to eat me- I mean, eat with me!” He stopped for a second and looked at the floor and the space between you two as both giggled a little. “All I’m saying,” Harry started again, looking up and into your eyes in a way that made both of you catch your breaths. “Is that I very much want you to come eat dinner with me, and if you’d rather-“

“-If I’d rather stay at home freezing you’d totally understand?” You challenged him. He smiled in return. “I very much want to eat dinner with you, Harry.” Somewhere inside of Harry, something started to bloom. “But I got to put all of this stuff back then.”

“Oh, we’re keeping the crisps.” Harry said as he plucked them out of your arms.

“Oh?” You watched him put them in his carry-on.

“If you’re coming to mine to eat,” Harry started, looking at you with that wry smile again. “Then I don’t really want us to stop eating.” That way you’ll stay around longer. But Harry didn’t say that.

You looked away as you felt yourself starting to blush, hurrying away to put all of your rubbish food back in its place.

¤ ¤ ¤

It was lightly snowing outside, the shy above you a dull grey and the chilly winter winds of Britain hit you like a whip across the face. You suddenly remembered why you preferred staying inside. Harry’s temporary flat wasn’t far from the Tesco, meaning that the two of you didn’t live too far away from one another. You thought about this for a moment as Harry held the door of his flat building open for you. You thanked him as you walked inside and he walked in front of you up all those stairs that led to the top floor. Unlocking his flat, he opened the door for you once again and you were greeted with the warmth of not only the inside of a small and luxurious flat, but also by the warmth of the absolute adorableness of it. A door stood to both the left and the right as you entered, so you automatically assumed that one led to the bathroom and the other to the bedroom. You were scared that asking which was the bedroom would lead to an awkward conversation and silence that you were not about.

The walls were a soft beige colour and the floors of royal mahogany. Huge French windows hung prettily over the opposite wall that stretched out the length of the flat. After you took your shoes of, you followed Harry into his living area. The black kitchen was to the right with white-tiled floor and dark grey counters, the chairs by the kitchen island were of dark leather and you knew that they were probably more comfortable than your sofa at home. The living room was brown and beige with a cute fireplace, a good-sized sofa, a coffee-table, carpet, and a flat screen. It didn’t seemed that he had lived here long enough to decorate the walls or anything major to make it more personal.

“How long have you lived here?” You asked him, looking around yourself at his cute flat. You remembered Nick saying something about Harry only living here temporarily, but you don’t remember more than that.

“About a month.” Harry answered, putting the shopping bags on the kitchen island. “I have a house in L.A., but I’m staying here for a bit before I’m going to start filming for the movie I’m cast in. Besides, most of my family and friends are here in London.”

You walked over to help him unload. “So this is a temporary place then?”

“Yea.” Harry answered, opening the fridge to put most of the stuff in there. “Will probably sell it once I’m done filming.”

You nodded, putting some vegetables in the fridge. “Spending most of your break in the US then?”

“Most likely, yea.” Harry looked over his shoulder at you as you put his butter on a shelf. Without meaning to, he started thinking about how he didn’t feel like spending most of the hiatus in L.A. when he could be spending it here in London; with you. Shaking his head at himself and dragging a hand through his long locks to keep them in place, Harry walked over to put the bread on the counter beside his bowl of oranges. He barely knew you, he needed to calm down.

“What does L.A. have that London doesn’t?” You grinned at him, clearly challenging him into something that he didn’t really have an answer for.

Letting a chuckle go as he leaned against the counter, Harry stared at the kitchen island for a bit. “My house.”

“But London’s got the great weather, the insanely nice taxi-drivers, and the most overrated shopping street in the world!” Your voice dripped sarcasm and Harry couldn’t help but to laugh at you. “And, let’s not forget, every house has a rat problem. Who would not want to live here?”

Harry laughed and let his hand trace his jawline as he watched you, appreciating the smile on your face more than he ever thought he’d do. Something inside his tummy came to life and he felt it out to the tips of his fingers. All because of that smile you had spread across your face.

“Want to start making food?” Harry asked and you nodded.

“What are we making?” You take the apron Harry hands you, watching as he puts his own on over his all-black outfit. There wasn’t an explanation for it, but you found Harry in an apron so insanely hot that you wanted to start fanning yourself right then and there. With his hands on his hips, Harry read through the cooking-book that he had wrapped out on the kitchen counter.

“Salt and pepper chicken with spring quinoa pilaf.”

You felt yourself grow into a question mark. “What was that now?”

Harry’s mouth tipped up a little at the corners and he looked up at you through his lashes. “Do you make a lot of food?”

“I do.” You nod your head once. “I make margarita pizza, cheese and ham pizza, veggie pizza-“ You stopped yourself as Harry let out such an adorable giggle that you could feel your insides starting to melt.

“Well, today I’m going to teach you how you make the best quinoa pilaf.” Harry clapped his hands together, walking over to his cupboard to get all the equipment out. You could see the muscles in his back work through his tee shirt and you knew you needed to do something or else you wouldn’t be able to think straight by the end of the night.

“Want any help?”

“If you wouldn’t mind getting the ingredients, love. They’re all listed in the book.” Harry could feel himself blush so madly that he didn’t dare turn around to face you just yet. He hadn’t meant to call you ‘love’, it had just slipped out, like it had been the most natural thing in the world. Biting his lip, he willed the redness to evaporate before he watched you while you got the ingredients out of the fridge.

Putting the oven to 230 degrees, you two started following the instructions in the cook-book.

“Okay,” Harry began. “Heat 2 tablespoons oil in a large ovenproof skillet over medium-high heat. Season chicken with salt and pepper. Cook skin-side down, in batches, until the skin is golden and crispy, 5 to 7 minutes.”

“I think you should do that.”

“Why?”

“Because I will most likely fuck it up.”

“Then you’re doing it.”

You frowned, looking up at him like he’d just told you Earth was flat. “Pardon?”

“I’m teaching you how to make this, you’ll make it.”

You didn’t get another word out before Harry put the oil in the skillet and then the chicken filets as well. Anxiety started to bubble up because you didn’t want to make a fool of yourself in front of Harry, but here you were, about to make him repellent of you. He was going to think you were incompetent.

“Do you know how to season chicken filets?”

“N-No.”

Harry looked at you as you stood to his right. “That’s fine, I’ll tell you what to do.” Placing a gentle hand on your waist, Harry pushed you to stand in front of the stove. Electrifying sparks went through the both of you, neither being able to explain what it was or how this was occurring. You didn’t want him to move his hand away, but Harry’s inner gentleman told him to do so. He didn’t want to me too forward. Hell, you two hadn’t even been out on a first date yet. “Okay,” Harry cleared his throat, looking at the chicken filets in the pan. “What you want to do is just put some salt and pepper on them. Not too much, but enough so that we can taste the difference, yea? Chicken without anything to it tends to taste like… well, nothing.”

You nod along to his words, taking the pepper in your hands before you took a breath and poured some on one of the two filets.

“Okay.” Harry nodded. “A little less pepper next time unless you want us to sneeze all night.”

“Loads of pepper, then.” You joke, taking the knife Harry gave you to scrape some of the heaps of pepper off.

“I mean,” Harry shrugged. “If that’s what does it for you, then sure. Pour it all on.”

You laughed, and Harry let out a little chuckle as well while watching you. Something about your laugh made flowers grow within him. Scraping it off till Harry told you it was fine, you put the same amount of pepper on the second filet. With satisfaction in his eyes, Harry watched as you put the same mount of salt on and then turned the filets over.

“Good work.”

“Call me chef from now on.” You smile at him, watching as Harry lets out single, deep chuckle.

“Alright, but can you roast the chicken in the oven until the internal temperature of the chicken reaches 75 degrees?” Harry crossed his arms at you, raising his eyebrows to try you out.

You frown a little. “How do you know the internal temperature? Witchcraft?”

Harry smiled his diamond-worthy smile. “By how long it’s been in the oven.”

“And how long is it supposed to be in the oven for?”

Harry licked his lips while taking his elastic band off his wrist, putting his long hair up in a bun as he watched you watch him. You couldn’t help but wonder what it would feel like to braid his wonderous hair or what it would feel like to tug it- Stop, you told yourself, looking away from him and down at the filets in the skillet. Without letting Harry do it, you walked over to the cook-book and read it yourself.

“18 to 22 minutes.”

“Correct.” Harry took the skillet off the stove and put it in the oven, setting the timer before he walked over to deal with the rest of the ingredients. “Now we just have to deal with this.”

Working together, the two of you stood there in silence as you cut the rest of the ingredients up. Harry put on some soft music at some point and you found yourself, more than once, watching him as some melodic Elvis tune filled the small space of his London flat. He, too, checked you out when you weren’t watching. Though he would never admit to having done it, he let his eyes roam your body from your hair to your feet as you stood with your back to him, letting it all sink in before you turned back around. He had already come to love the shape of your bum, a part of yourself that you had always been slightly insecure about. Or how you’d sigh to yourself when you thought you did a shitty job, he found that endearing.

You had already started to smile at the sight of Harry when he’d press his lips together in concentration, or when he’d blow some of his hair that had gone loose form his bun out of his face. How could someone be so incredibly cute one second and so immensely sexy the next? Some questions could never be answered.

Your dinner was done before you knew it and then the two of you were sitting by the kitchen island. Harry had given you a wineglass each, but he filled it with water, knowing that you were going to work at 7am the next morning.

“It does smell delicious.” You admitted, looking down at your plate as Harry sat down beside you.

“And to think you weren’t a chef before this day. One would’ve never thought.” Harry gave you a little smile and you couldn’t help but bite your lip as a beam so huge was about to erupt on your lips. “Let’s taste it, yea?”

Tasting it, you look at Harry with your eyebrows raised in astonishment. “Wow. This is really-“

But you didn’t get another word out as you were both swallowed in darkness. Silence settled over the two of you as you realised what had happened; Harry’s power had gone, too. With a swear on his lips, Harry got up and walked to his French windows, looking out on the neighbourhood and the flats that matched his own. Some lights from central London shone in the distance, but the whole of North London was in complete black-out. Turning to you, you only saw the outlined profile of your friend as he stood looking back at you.

“Good thing I like candles, ey?”

With the help of the flashlight from your phones, the two of you walked into Harry’s room to get them from the drawer he used to stock them in. Without really meaning to, you took a glance around the room. Noticing how comfortable the huge double-bed looked and how he had a picture of him and his family on the nightstand, it was all so… Harry. The windows were covered with a sheer fabric that you had no doubt would let the sun shine in to wake him in the mornings. Not paying attention to Harry or what was going on, you walked into him as he looked through his drawer of candles. Jumping a bit, you were going to put your hand in front of your mouth so not to make any awkward noises, when instead, you gave Harry a nice pat on the ass. It was silent before Harry looked at you over his shoulder. This is it, you thought, I am going to die from this. This is my death. The light from his phone provided you of just enough so you could make out the giant grin on his face.

“Jesus [Y/N],” Harry said, clearly about to tell a joke. “If you want to grope me, you don’t have to wait for the power in all of London to go out to do it. I’ll happily let you touch my ass whenever you want.-“

“-Harry!” You cannot fight the laughter bubbling up and Harry can’t either. “I’m sorry for… groping you. I just got scared when I hit something walking in the dark.”

“No worries, princess.” Harry said and he was so glad the lights were out. How had he called you ‘love’ and ‘princess’ in one evening? This must be a record for how much he had embarrassed himself in less than 2 hours. He didn’t usually feel so nervous around anyone, but he had this overwhelming instinct to impress you for a reason. “I, eh… here are some candles.” Harry gave you a couple, unaware of how fast your heart was beating after he called you that. Princess. What was he doing to you?

You two walked back to his living room and lit all the candles. You didn’t want to think about how fucking romantic this was. The two of you eating a dinner you had made together and now eating in candlelight? This hadn’t even been intentional. You had come to Harry’s flat because you had lost your power, and now you sat here in his flat without any power. The food had cooled down a bit while the two of you had been lighting the candles, but you didn’t really care because everything that was going through your mind sounded a lot like “No worries, princess”. Harry sat down next to you and you two started eating your dinner. It was absolutely amazing and you closed your eyes as you ate and swallowed the first bite. Fives bites later, and Harry turned to you.

“So… where did you grow up?” He asked, putting a fork filled with chicken and quinoa.

“[your hometown].” You took a bite as well.

“Tell me what it was like growing up there.”

And so you talk. The two of you talk for hours and hours. You fill him in on everything in your life and he talks about his. You find mutual interests and that you prefer different TV shows to one another. It had been such a long time since you had gone on a date that you had completely forgotten how much fun it was like to get to know a new person that you were truly interested in. Not that this was a date, but oh, how you wished it was. Harry didn’t tell you like you didn’t tell him, but he too wanted this to be a date. He had never really been keen to label anything, really, but he wanted to label this. He wanted to know where this was heading or if it was heading anywhere at all. The two of you laughed at the same things and were passionate about the same subjects. Neither had thought that you would ever find someone so fully yourself but as another person. But here you were. And as you looked at the clock on your phone to have it show 00:34, you sighed and looked back at Harry.

“I have to leave.”

Harry sighed. “Really?”

“Yea, I have work in the morning.”

Harry nodded and watched as you got up and took your plate. “No,” Gently, he took the plate from your hands. “I’ll wash it up.”

“I can do it, really-“

“-You have work in the morning.” Harry teased and you could feel yourself smiling as he turned his back on you, walking over to put the plates in the sink. He walked you out and leaned against the wall as you took your fleece jacket back on. “When will I see you again?” Harry asked, and you had a little flashback to when he asked you that exact same question on New Years Eve.

“I guess that depends on when you ask me out.”

The wry smile showed then and Harry looked down at the floor before taking you in again. “So you’ll go out with me?”

“Dinner then?”

Harry cocked his head a little to the side. “Okay, no dinner. We’ll do something else.”

“Dinner would be fine, really.” You reassure him.

“I’ll surprise you.” He smiled, and with that, you smiled back and left. You had never smiled all the way home before, but that night you did.

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hannahindie · 7 years ago

Text

What You Wake For

Characters: Reader, Team Free Will (sorta kinda, you’ll see), and a voice that you might find familiar. Word Count: 2,742 Warnings: Nothing, really. I honestly don’t think there’s a thing you need to be warned about. Nope. A/N: This was written for my “Han’s Sing It With Me! 800 Follower Challenge”, and was requested by the ever wonderful @trexrambling. The song she chose was “Progress” by MuteMath, which you can find HERE. This was another one that I tweaked until I got it exactly where I wanted it. I hope you don’t mind me slightly deviating from course, though it is about Team Free Will, water bear. The surreal sound of it kind of made me think of a dream, or like when you first wake up and you aren’t sure where you are.

Quick note: The main italicized portions are the...narrator? Yea. The narrator. lol I mean, I guess the aesthetic (which she won! just so you know), kinda gives it away. Just keep going, you’ll see.

Beta’d by the ever wonderful @masksandtruths. Thanks for the late night talk through, even if I did fall asleep on ya. ;)

As always, tags are at the bottom. If you’d like to be added, please let me know. :)

In Lebanon, Kansas, there stands a building. The building itself is unremarkable; iron barred windows and soot stained chimneys make it look formidable, and though it has been there since most people in Lebanon can remember, no one has ever been inside.

The power plant was completed in 1935 and its existence just accepted. Up until a few years ago, it had been abandoned, quiet and cold, its windows dark. If you were to ask people in town, they'd tell you that they aren't sure when they began seeing the old muscle car sitting by the ancient, rusted door, just that it would sometimes disappear for stretches at a time, only to reappear without warning. Like the sudden appearance of the power plant, the presence of the car was just another thing that they accepted without question.

I’m telling you all of this because I need you to know where you are, I need you to remember...but just telling you...not really my bag. I’m a storyteller, a pretty good one if you were to ask certain audiences, so we’re going to take this nice and slow, introduce it like...easing yourself into cold water. ...Okay, that wasn’t the best...you know what, don’t worry about that. Just look in front of you. You should see a large, iron door.

Suddenly, my eyes snap open. Whoever is narrating whatever…this is...in my mind, wasn't wrong. I'm standing in front of a huge, seemingly abandoned power plant. I slowly walk down a small set of stairs, my legs shaky like I haven't used them for awhile, but stop just as I get to the door. Despite the fact that I have no idea where Lebanon is, or why I'm here, or even who I am, I know that opening strange doors to abandoned buildings...not my jam. Also, the question remains: why am I listening to a voice in my head, and so calmly?

You're probably wondering why you should listen to me. I would tell you but I don't think you'd believe me. So just follow along, huh? Think of this like...the ghost of Christmas past. Well, present, I guess. Just...just...okay, fine. What if I told you that if you were to open that heavy front door, you’d find that instead of entering the bottom floor of the power plant, you were instead led onto a balcony that overlooked a large room? Not just any room though, one of the most important rooms in existence, and at the center, a backlit table showing a map of the world. Computers and communication devices line the outside edge, and at the very back, steps lead up into what appears to be another large room. There are chairs and small tables along the upper balcony and around the room below. Though it appears to be mostly untouched, you would probably see an abandoned beer bottle on the map table, along with a couple of books left open to marked pages, as if someone had been deep in research before disappearing. Does any of that strike your fancy? C’mon, I sold that...I gotta write that down. So how about it? Gonna open that door?

My hand reaches out on its own accord, and surprisingly the door pulls open easily, as if left unlocked. The door creaks open and I step inside, squinting as my eyes adjust to the dim light.

On this particular day, the building appears to be empty. I can feel the presence of something; an overwhelming sense that this is home. That something leads me down the stairs and across the room, and my attention is drawn to the giant telescope at the back of what appears to be the library.

Yea, there's a telescope, which is impressive, but not what you should pay attention to. No, it’s the table that’s important. I know, I know. I said I would ease you into this, and I am, I am, but we’ve only got so much time, and it’s running out. I’m not trying to tell you to hurry it up...but...hurry, please?

The solitary lamp that has been left on shines down on initials, carved carefully into the table top. I want to reach out and touch them, two sets of familiar letters that I can’t seem to drag my eyes from. After a moment of staring at them, and an odd sense of impatience that doesn’t seem to be coming from me, I reach out and trace the rough edges, barely grazing them with my fingertips, and that feeling of home sweeps over me again. These initials were carved with love, and that’s when I see the third set of initials, a little newer than the other two. There are still splinters of wood scattered around the freshly marred table top, as if whoever had carved them left in a hurry.

D.W. S.W. C.W.

These initials are important. You know these initials, you know them as well as your own. They are a piece of history for anyone else that finds them, an important discovery after the owners are long gone, a remnant of a time when the world depended on them. A sweep of the room will show that whoever lives here keeps it neat, and despite the rogue books that are lying on the table, everything seems to be in its place. Even the books are neatly arranged, stacked perfectly at the edge of the table. Like I said...everything has a place. It’s time to move on, though. The great hourglass of life is tickin’ away, don’t want to waste it in this room. C’mon, let’s go.

I look around the room for a moment, trying to grasp the memory prickling the back of my mind. My gaze drops back to the carvings, and something pulls, a tightness in my chest as I stare. The impatience returns, and I find myself walking away from the library and down a hallway. There are doors on each side, all of them closed, but none of them stand out. Something is leading me through this labyrinth, although it’s hard to tell what that something is; it’s familiar and safe, a recognizable warmth that I can’t quite put my finger on. I continue to follow it, because up until this point, I’ve been given no reason to fear this place...unless you count the disembodied voice that keeps telling me what to do. I follow my feet until they stop at a closed door: Room Eleven. The knob is worn brass, the shine gone after years of use. I reach out to grab it but hesitate. As of now, this place has been empty, but I’m not about to just walk into a stranger’s room.

Go ahead, you can open it. No one is here to stop you.

The door creaks open, and a dull light greets me; clearly, no one takes the time to turn off lights around here. Though dim, it gives me a good view of the room, where every single thing is exactly where it should be.

Guns are displayed carefully on the wall, a single empty space suggesting that whoever lived here favored that particular one. A hamper sits in one corner, a faded blue and green flannel draped over the side; clearly a favorite, and I’m tempted to pick it up. Again, I hesitate. Why the hell do I want to pick up some unknown person’s dirty clothes?

See, that’s the very reason you need to pick it up. Pick it up, put it on, think about why the pattern is familiar. I think I’ve made myself pretty clear, you’ve got some remembering to do, I can’t give you all of it. I mean, I could, I can do whatever I want, but it’s better this way.

So I do. I grasp it gently, my fingers grazing over the soft fabric, and if I thought something pulled at my heart before, it feels like it’s in a vice now. It’s like a punch in the gut, the sudden wave of love that sweeps over me. For a moment, I can’t breathe, it’s like the air is sucked out of my lungs and I hold the shirt to my chest, my eyes closed as I try to calm down. I slip my arms into the warm flannel and pull it up over my shoulders. It’s occurred to me that whoever brought me here...did so sans clothes. Maybe this is a dream, like one of those dreams that you show up to school naked. The bossy voice interrupts my thoughts again.

Look around the room, try to spot the more important things; headphones laying on the desk, the cord neatly wrapped around them, a picture of a young child and their mother, another picture of a man and a woman, smiling at each other widely. Particularly that last one. That’s the most important one of all.

I pick up the picture and run my fingers across the man’s face. His impossibly green eyes sparkle even in the worn ink, and I’m reminded of a field full of daisies. The memory is gone in an instant, but I have this vague feeling he is involved. One more look around the room, and I see a desk with a journal next to a pile of old books. The room, though inviting enough that I’m tempted to curl up in the neatly made bed, has nothing left to discover for now, it seems. I walk outside and shut the door gently behind me.

Without thinking, my feet carry me down the hall, where I stop in front of an open door; Room Fifteen. It’s barely furnished, although the bed is made. The only light in this room is what is coming through the door, which just so happens to land on a picture of three men laying on the desk; the green eyed man from the previous room, a tall man with shaggy brown hair, and a serious looking man in a trench coat, his eyes the brightest blue I think I’ve ever seen. All three seem to be amused by something, but the man to the right is squinting as if unsure of what the joke actually is. I flip it over and find a label written in messy handwriting: Me, Sam, and Cas. Team Free Will at its finest. There’s no date, although it seems more recent than the previous photograph I found. Though I am clearly drawn more to the green eyed man, I feel a great fondness for the other two. Are they my family?

Oh, there it is….there...it...is. It’s coming back, isn’t it? Team Free Will is the name they’ve given themselves, but you are closer to the truth. I know we haven’t got much time but every moment of time’s just an answer to find. I need you to know what you're here for, what you breathe for...what you wake for, what you bleed for. These men, they’re what you hope for, what you live for. I need you to remember why. Keep searching.

I lay the picture back where I found it, and wander back into the hallway. As I travel, there are more rooms on each side, but none of them are important. At this point, I think I’d feel it if they were. That is, until I reach room Twenty-One. I stop, and just like at Room Eleven, my hand slowly reaches out for the knob. It’s not closed all the way, however, and a gentle push is all it takes to gain entrance.

The room is set up in a similar fashion to the other rooms, however, instead of weapons hanging on the wall, there’s a coat rack and a filing cabinet lining one wall. The shelf behind the bed is lined with research materials and random artifacts, and a television is on the dresser facing the bed. The desk is neatly arranged, notebooks stacked evenly, and pens laying in a row. Much like the library earlier, everything has a place, and I can tell whoever organized that room probably resides in this one. There is love in this room, and though different from whatever I felt in Room Eleven, it’s familiar and safe.

There is a mirror on the opposite wall from where you’re standing...you should go look into it. You might be surprised to see that your face is the one in the picture with the green-eyed man. A lot of things have happened. The thing you need to realize though is that despite everything, despite the confusion I’m sure you must feel, the three men represented in these rooms are important. They’re important to the world, but especially to you. They are your home, your family. They fought for you when no one else would. They saved you, and you them. You sacrificed yourself for them. But they need you...which is how you ended up here.

I don’t have time to explain the why or the how. It’s not important. Well, I mean, I guess it will be important eventually, but what you need to know right now is that these men...they have a job to do. The love and the loyalty and the passion all outweigh how broken they all can be. I like to compare them to the Japanese art of kintsugi. It’s where you take broken porcelain and fix it with gold and silver so that it’s still functioning, still whole, but you can see the history of it, and everything it has survived. You...well, you are the gold. And for them to move on to the next part of their journey, they needed you back.

I stare in the mirror, my fingers tracing a ragged scar that crosses my collarbone and disappears under the borrowed shirt. There are scars criss crossing my arms, and a nasty one on my thigh, just beneath where the hem of my shirt rests. What happened to me? And what does this voice mean by ‘needed me back’? Where have I been? I see something black peeking out from under my collar and I pull it back. The black tattoo there stands out in stark contrast to my pale skin and I’m suddenly hit with a memory. Two brothers trying not to laugh as I get my first tattoo, the green eyed man holding my hand, his eyes crinkling and dimples popping as he bites his lip. Dean. Sam. I gasp and the memory is gone. This is my home. This is my family.

That’s my girl, you’re remembering. It’s not a lot, I know, but it’ll be enough. Our time is up, you need to head back to the war room. You know, the one with the fancy map table? I know this is confusing, and I wish I had more time to explain. I’ve told you so much and so little at the same time, I blame my writer’s brain. Gotta make things more wordy than they need to be, I’d say that’s probably why the world has gone off the tracks as much as it has...but I’m doing it again, so let’s just leave it at that, huh? They will be able to explain some of this to you, and some of it...well, some if might be best left unsaid.

Everyone’s counting on you, even if they don’t realize it. Remember, kintsugi. You will be the gold that holds them together, your courage and love and confidence...all of it. All three of them need you, don’t you waste a second doubting that. It’ll be hard, I know. And before you ask, I just know, okay? I know...well, I know a lot. Kind of my thing. Now go.

I walk back down the hall and towards the room I first walked into. It is still empty, and all I can think to do is stand awkwardly in the middle of it. I hear voices, laughter, and the creaking of the iron door as it’s shoved open. Three sets of footsteps echo through the large, open room, and all three come to a stop when they see me standing there. My eyes meet Dean’s and his mouth drops open. All three stare at me for what seems like hours before Dean finally breaks the silence.

“Y/N?”

Like what you see? Would you like to see more? You can check out my master list HERE.

Forever Tags: @trexrambling @pinknerdpanda @wheresthekillswitch @emilywritesaboutdean @arryn-nyxx @emptywithout @escabell @charliebradbury1104 @jarpadandjensenaremyheroes @deanssweetheart23 @canadianjelly @super-not-naturall @aubreyreadsstuff @dean-winchesters-baby @melissaj616 @fandomismyspiritanimal @keepcalmandcarryondean @assbutt-still-in-hell @owllover123 @rosie-winchester @amionthetumbler @duubaduu @hiimaprofessionalfangirl @goldenolaf25 @authoressskr @nanie5 @mrssamfuckingwinchester @zincomms @kathaswings @crazynerdandproud @barbedwireandbubblegum @sandlee44 @boxywrites @justanotherdeangirl @smalltowndivaj @captainradicalpassion @myloveforyouxx @atc74 @mrsbatesmotel53 @easelweasel @there-must-be-a-lock @masksandtruths @thelittleredwhocould @jotink78 @amanda-teaches @ilsawasanacrobat @squirrel-moose-winchester @mjdoc90 @anticipate1003 @mrswhozeewhatsis

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#Han's Sing It With Me! Challenge #Progress #MuteMath #Supernatural fanfiction #team free will #insinuated dean x reader #implied angst #mostly happy memories though I think #I don't know

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were-cheetah-stiles · 7 years ago

Text

The College Years - Freshman Year (Chapter 7) - Stiles Stilinski

Author: @were-cheetah-stiles

Title: “The Third Patrol”

Characters: Stiles Stilinski & Reader/OFC

Warnings: Fluff, cursing.

Author’s Note: Ignore the issues with the timeline and just go with it.

Summary: Stiles and Y/N go on your third patrol where you two discuss her being a witch and you both finally run into some vampires.

Chapter Six - Chapter Seven - Chapter Eight

"So how do you become a witch? Are you born one or does something happen to make you one?" Stiles asked as you both sat in his infamous battered up, blue Jeep, watching the front door of the building that one of the alleged vampires had walked into the hour before, while the last group was on patrol.

"I was born one, but sometimes you can be made one later in life. It's all kind of a long story.." You explained.

"I mean, we've got three more hours of this until the sun comes up..." Stiles prodded.

You laughed quietly. "Right.. Well, the gift is inherited... I guess would be the best way to describe it. I got it from my Grandfather on my Dad's side.. and there are rules about how you receive it."

"What are those?" Stiles inquired.

"My grandpa Jack, he died during open heart surgery, on the operating table on May 12th, 1979, at 7:31PM. I was born May 12th, 1992, at 7:31PM..."

"That's ominous.. Wait, so let's just settle this once and for all, how is this your first year at Berkeley if you are two years older than me?" Stiles blurted out, remembering the age difference.

You laughed. "I did a year at NYU and then took a year off and then I transferred. So I have two years left after this one.. maybe an extra semester because of the double major." You explained with a small sigh.

"NYU, that's cool. Okay, didn't mean to interrupt."

You smiled and continued. "So you need a blood connection for the gift to be passed, but you also need that celestial, natural, magical, I don't know what you'd call it, connection. Basically, it's nature balancing itself out again. There can only be so many with the gift at once and so someone must lose it for someone else to gain it." You explained, talking with your hands in a way that he thought was really cute and endearing, and kind of reminded him of himself.

"So it's given through death and gained through birth, but the death has to be the exact same time as the birth?" Stiles asked, understanding what you were explaining.

"Exactly, and if someone dies after you're born, but like on your birthday at the exact time you were born, you receive their gift. So your parents can try to plan for you to be born at a certain time, or back in the old days, grandparents, or great-grandparents with the gift, would sacrifice themselves at the birth of a new family member to make sure that the gift was passed, but that's pretty barbaric and obviously not how I got my gift."

"So are you the only one in your family who has it?" Stiles continued his line of questioning.

"No, no, my Mom is a human, she doesn’t come from witches, but my Dad is a witch from birth, and my sister gained her powers when my grandmother passed a couple of years ago. She's a Friday the 13th witch too, so she's become incredibly powerful in a very short amount of time. The gift comes naturally to her, I guess because of her birthday." You admitted, staring at your hands, your fingertips beginning to fade.

“Y/N...” Stiles reached out towards you and placed his fingers over where he knew yours were supposed to be. Your momentary invisibility began to fade at his touch. You looked up at him and stared for a few short moments. "So why did you move across the country if you have a family full of witches to train with back home? I mean, I know that stuff with your parents happened but.." Stiles whispered, his soft brown eyes staring at your touching hands.

You felt more comfortable letting him in on the whole story of why you left New York now that you knew him better. "So I told you that my parents split up.. I didn't tell you that it was because my Dad cheated on my Mom after almost thirty years together."

"Holy shit.." Stiles' face sunk into a horrified frown.

"Yea, he didn't really ever respect my Mom because she isn't a witch, but then he ended up cheating on her with another human and he moved in with her and it was just a total shitshow." You admitted. "So he left and moved out to the Hamptons and we sold our place by the beach and moved in with my Dad's mom in Queens, and none of us spoke to my Dad for a while. I trained with my Grandma Elodie... she was the best... But when she died and Margot, my sister, got her gift, Margot went racing to my Dad to train her... it was becoming too much like a competition with her over our powers and I just wasn't interested in continuing that. We were constantly getting into fights and she was getting a little too hostile, and she kept showing up to the house in Queens and getting into fights with and threatening my mom because she felt that I was my mom's favorite and the whole thing was just insane. So, I wanted to get as far away as possible and I did." You whispered back, resting your head against the headrest and staring at Stiles.

"I don't know what to say..." Stiles muttered, sitting up a little straighter. His heart sunk into his stomach over all the horrible things that you had gone through in the past few years.

"It's okay, really. It's gotten better since I left."

"It's not okay. I am so sorry that all that happened to you.... I don't know.. you're safe here." Stiles looked serious.

You laughed, eliciting a confused look from the boy across from you. "Stiles..." You lifted your hands out of his and gestured through the windshield. "Look what we are doing right now!"

"I mean, yea, there are vampires maiming people and stuff, I guess. But like, safe in general, you know what I mean?" Stiles bit his upper lip, hating himself for saying such an obviously stupid thing. "Anyway, are you the only witches.. your family.."

You chuckled at his goofiness. "No, the families in our area have sort of stuck together for centuries. We're known as New England witches, we're descended from like the Salem witch trial kind of witches, who were descended from witches in France... so I know a couple dozen families just by me in New York. But I also met some coven witches down in New Orleans once when I was really little. They were the only ones I've ever known who live outside of Massachusetts and New York and Maine." You said as you leaned forward, resting your chin on your hands against Stiles' dashboard, watching the front door of the building you were staking out.

"What are coven witches?" Stiles said, watching you and not the door.

You turned your head, still resting against you hands, and faced Stiles. "Coven witches are the ones who cast spells and make real potions. Think Sabrina The Teenage Witch, but darker."

"What do you mean 'darker'? What do they do?" Stiles asked, leaning forward towards his steering wheel, to get closer to you.

"I don’t know exactly, actually. Most of what I know about them is stuff I've been told or rumors..... I've never really met one. I was introduced to a woman named Raina Ducette when we visited the South when I was growing up, but my mom and sister and I all stayed outside while my dad and Raina talked so I've never actually met one, I guess." Stiles raised his eyebrow, inclining you to speak more. "..I don't know, I've heard that they can put hexes and curses on people, though I'm not sure what the difference is between those two things, aaaand they still practice sacrifices to pass the gift to a new generation, the difference is they then resurrect their dead." You divulged.

"Like actual resurrection?" Stiles asked curiously.

"Yea, but everything in magic comes with a price, nature has to balance back out. When you resurrect someone, someone else has to die. I've heard that they pay strangers to sacrifice themselves for money that then goes to their families or whoever. It's pretty fucked up." You yawned and looked back at the door. "Stiles.." You grabbed his upper thigh. "They're coming out and there are more of them this time."

"Shit." Stiles said quickly, as he watched them walk towards the Jeep.

Stiles looked down at your hand and watched as it began to disappear again, even though he still felt it gripping his leg. He watched as his own legs and arms began to disappear as well. In mere moments, as the five large, pale, vampire men walked towards the parked Jeep, you and Stiles were completely invisible.

"I thought you said you haven't mastered this?" Stiles whispered, his heart racing from both the fear of being caught and the feeling of your hand touching him in a place that could easily become intimate.

"I haven't. It won't hold for long. You may have to drive really fast if they don't keep walking." You whispered, as you watched them approach the car.

"Well that’s not ideal!" Stiles exclaimed a little too loudly.

"They may not be able to see us, but I'm pretty sure they can still hear you." You gripped his thigh tighter, as you strained to keep yourselves out of sight.

"Just hold on a little longer." Stiles encouraged you.

"I'm trying, I just don't think I can." You whispered back.

"What can I do to help?"

Stiles wondered out loud, as the vampire that they recognized from Malia and Scott's description walked up to the rear window of the Jeep, fogging up the glass with his breath as he peered inside.

Stiles took his large hand, tracing it from your hand that was on his leg, up your arm, over your shoulder, pushing your hair out of the way, and resting it on the back of your neck, gently massaging it to ease your nerves. He placed his other hand on top of yours and listened to you trying to hold your breath. They were surrounding the car now.

Suddenly, an older man stepped out of an apartment building from across the street. The vampires dispersed, falling into the shadows in order to stalk their new prey. You let out a deep sigh of relief. Stiles left his hand on the back of your neck, still lightly kneading his thumb into your knots, as his arm and your body began to reappear. You were staring right at him.

"I've never held it for that long. I.. I've never been able to." You whispered. Stiles stared back at you, not saying anything, still feeling your hand wrapped around his leg. You remembered the old man. "We should get out and follow them, in case they try to hurt that guy."

Stiles nodded, grabbed his bat from the back seat and you both exited his car. You followed the group of vampires from a safe distance for several blocks, until you watched them corner the older man into a dark alleyway.

"I have to text Scott. We can't just stand here and watch them hurt or kill this guy. No one is going to stop this but us." Stiles exclaimed, as he pulled out his phone and began typing.

"Call the police and leave an anonymous tip. So far, they have left when the cops come. But follow them!" Scott wrote.

Stiles got on the phone with the 911 operator.

"A patrol car is a few blocks away from your location, sir. They will be there momentarily, please stay at the scene." The emergency dispatcher said, as he began to hear sirens in the not so far off distance.

"They're running away." You mentioned, as you pointed to the group of vampires running out of the alley and down the street. "We have to follow them." You took off running.

"Y/N! Oh, son of a bitch...." He took off running after her.

Chapter Six <- -> Chapter Eight

Let me know what you thought and if you’d like to be tagged in the next chapter. :)

@alexhmak @dontstopxx @iloveteenwolf24 @chivesoup @vampirepinary @parislight @surpeme-bean @snek-shit

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squirrelly831 · 5 years ago

Text

Caught in Public [Jackson, Jinyoung, and Youngjae]

Unlike the EXO version, this is not part of the daddy!auverse

Enjoy~

Jackson

Ciara and Jackson went to Japan to celebrate their fifth year anniversary. They enjoyed every moment in Tokyo and when they returned they were no longer just boyfriend and girlfriend. While spending a day in Shinjuku Gyoen, Jackson had popped the question and she said yes. What neither of them knew was that there were a couple of fans witnessed their proposal and snapped photos.

They returned to South Korea and as they headed out from the Incheon Airport they were ambushed by fans and media. Jackson threw Ciara’s hoodie over she head and covered her from the flashes of the cameras around them. When they got on the train, they decided to look online to see that their proposal had been released to the public.

Ciara’s stomach did flips as she read the article over Jackson’s arm. “What’ll we do, Jackson? I know we were going to go public, but this isn’t how I wanted that to happen.”

Jackson blacked out his phone as he wrapped his arm over her shoulders. She put her head on his chest as he kissed her head, “I’ll deal with it. Don’t worry about it.”

He went to the company a couple days later with Ciara by his side and talked to his boss about it. Jackson had two choices, he could go public with his engagement or he could deny it. It wasn’t hard for Jackson to decided and he made his engagement public. After he made the public statement to convey to the media, he left the office and saw Ciara nervously waiting outside in the lobby. She saw him and her expression shifted, “Well what did he say? Can we go public?”

He said nothing as he approached her, leaned towards her, and kissed her. “Let’s go, love.” He reached down and intertwined their fingers as they left the lobby and out the company doors. He didn’t need to say more, his actions answered her question. She sped up to walk by his side as he swung their hands together. “I was thinking we should go out with the boys today, we should tell them about the engagement. What do you think?”

Ciara nodded, “I’d like that!” She leaned close to him as they walked and Jackson couldn’t help but get a quick kiss from her.

Jinyoung

Noelle and Jinyoung had a lot to lose if their relationship was discovered by the public, so they did everything they could to keep it secret. They began to date when Jinyoung was a trainee and their time together just grew. However, when he was picked for Got7, Jinyoung signed on knowing full well that he would be under a dating ban. Noelle and him made a promise that if they got caught they’d end their relationship even though it was the last thing either of them would ever want.

It was a couple of months before his contract was up when they were caught by the media and true to their word, Noelle broke it off. Of course, not without Jinyoung fighting it saying he didn’t want to lose her, but she refused to listen.

Jinyoung was banned from contacting Noelle as his company tried to do damage control to fix the problem. However, Jinyoung didn’t give up. He showed everyone how dedicated he was to Got7 and that he could manage both his relationship with Noelle and his career as a singer of Got7. He pleaded until he was given the new contract and his dating banned was lifted.

After he signed the new contract, two and a half months since the break up, Jinyoung ran out of the company with his cell phone on his ear as he listened to the rings. Each passing ring only made his smile grow wider.

“Hello?”

“Where are you?”

Noelle paused, “I’m about to go to Hongdae with some friends… Jinyoung why are you–”

Jinyoung called for a taxi, “ Meet me at our place. Please.”

“Jinyoung, I don–”

He climbed inside one and asked him to drop him off at the metro. “Noelle, please” he begged, “Come to our spot… I’m begging you.”

Noelle spoke to her friends before she let out a sigh, “Fine. I’ll catch the metro…”

Jinyoung said nothing as he hung up and pressed his phone to his chest. His heart pounded hard against his chest as he felt jittery. He needed to see Noelle. He needed to be with her.

When he got to Banpo Bridge, he saw Noelle sitting at the edge with a coffee in hand and another beside her. He approached her from behind and bent down to wrap his arms around her. She jumped at the sudden touch and looked back to see him. Jinyoung knew what was on the tip of her tongue, but he didn’t give her the chance to ask as he pressed his lips to hers. It was something he missed. The taste of her lips. He felt an electric shock as he deepened the kiss not caring about the people who were around. Hearing her moan in the kiss made him pull back. His hand traced the side of her face as he smiled at her, “You’re not allowed to leave me again, okay?”

Noelle hid her face as she felt it heat up, “What about JYP?”

“I signed a contract with them. This one doesn’t have a dating ban and I don’t want to be with anyone else but you.”

Noelle said nothing and she grabbed the coffee beside her. She held it out to him and he laughed at her sudden shy demeanor. He sat beside her as they caught up with one another. Their hands were interlaced and never parted the rest of the night.

Youngjae

Narae found it hard dating Youngjae. Not just because he was an idol, though it was a big reason, but also because she worked in the office at the same company as him. She was one of their graphic designers and with her work, and his, it was difficult to make time for one another. Youngjae would take off sometimes and bring her coffee or snacks and other times he’d drag her out to eat with him. Regardless, Youngjae was respectful when it came to Narae’s work. She wanted work to be a place just for that and not have her private affairs involved, so they kept their relationship under lock and key. The only ones who knew were the Got7 members.

It had all went well for the first year and a half, but one night, Youngjae dragged Narae out of work. It was almost 1 in the morning and he worried about her overstaying and not getting sleep, so he took her home. They walked the streets to her apartment, hands intertwined, and they discussed their days as Narae occasionally let out a yawn.

Once outside her apartment, Youngjae leaned down and pressed his lips to hers. The kiss was a lot more heated than a simple peck to part ways. His hands squeezed her sides as his tongue slipped in her mouth drawing out a moan from her, “I don’t want to leave…”

She could tell by the mischievous look in his eyes that he didn’t want to just come in to sleep. Narae bit her lip as she tried to control her own lust for her boyfriend. Youngjae swallowed at the seductive way she looked. She then shook her head, “Not tonight… I need sleep if I’ll be at work early.”

Youngjae reluctantly agreed, “You’re right. I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“I’ll see you tomorrow” she whispered as she headed to her apartment.

The next morning, as she got ready to work, her doorbell sounded repeatedly. Narae rushed to the door and swung it open to see Youngjae out of breath. “What in the world is wrong with you? It’s too early for all that.”

He pushed his way inside and shut the door, “Sorry. I just panicked and rushed over here.”

“What’s wrong?”

He took a few breaths as he looked at her, “What do you think about going public?” Narae looked at him curiously and waited for him to continue. She knew he didn’t just rush her apartment to ask her a question like that. Youngjae shook his head and laughed, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to ask that. It’s too late to ask something like that.”

“What do you mean by that?” Youngjae pulled out his phone and looked up an article that was posted in the last 30 minutes. He handed her his phone and she read the title. “Got7’s Youngjae Just Confirmed–YOU TOLD PEOPLE WE’RE TOGETHER!” She shouted in alarm. “Are you nuts?”

Youngjae took his phone and shook his head, “It couldn’t be avoided. Someone caught us outside the building holding hands. I couldn’t really deny the photos, but I didn’t tell them your name. Just said I was dating someone I work with and they make me happy.”

Narae’s eyes were wide as she looked at her boyfriend in disbelief, “And you didn’t get in trouble?”

“Oh no, I got lectured by hyung for being careless, but there’s not much I could do about it.” He pulled her in his arms, “I’m just happy I don’t have to hide us anymore.”

She let out a light chuckle, “I guess that’s a plus… but I don’t think I can go into work today knowing that they may suspect it’s me.”

Youngjae grinned, “I already talked to the big man and he gave you the day off.” His eyes changed to the same mischievous look he gave her the night before, “Which means we can make up for last night, yea?”

Narae bit her lip as she took his hand in hers and lead him to her bedroom, “Guess we can.” His lips captured hers as they entered the bedroom and he swung the door shut.

Part I || Part III

Credit to gif owners

Written & revamped by Squirrelly831

♕ REQUEST

☮ GOT7 MASTERLIST

∞ ULTIMATE MASTERLIST

#got7 #got7 reactions #got7 scenarios #kpop #kpop reactions #kpop scenarios #jackson #jackson reactions #jackson scenarios #jinyoung #jinyoung reactions #jinyoung scenarios #youngjae #youngjae reactions #youngjae scenarios

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sudsybear · 7 years ago

Text

I just got here

That toolbox was the best gift I ever received (well, Bart did give me a 2-speed reversible cordless drill for Christmas a couple of years later. That was pretty cool, too. But it wasn’t completely original.) That toolbox was the key for me to meet people when I was away at school. Hammer, pliers, wrenches, jewelers’ screwdrivers, with Ross’ inspiration, he and Dad prepared me well. There are times in the dorm when you need a hammer, or pliers, or an adjustable wrench. Thanks to Ross, I had them. I used his gift idea several times over the years. On my urging, my brother-in-law took one with him when he left for college. I gave one to my babysitter when she graduated high school. I even gave one to my sister-in-law as a wedding gift. That one was fun – I labeled everything – what a screwdriver is really used for, and creative ideas for bedroom bungee cord use.

I’d like to say that’s what helped get me together with who would eventually be my husband. But in fact, Bart and I met because he needed a button sewn back on. (Well, he tells the button story. I maintain that the first time we met, we had a squirt gun fight that ended badly. He and his buddies gave up on the squirt guns and brought out the trash cans full of water. I was on the wrong end of gravity. I never knew how I met David or Ross, either.) My mother was old-fashioned enough to send me off to school with a sewing kit. With sewing kit and toolbox, I was the woman to see if you needed to repair something. Had I been more entrepreneurial, I could have rented out the tools for $5/hour or some such. I could have sold quarters to make money. My roommate thought it quite amazing that I purchased quarters ($10 rolls) at the bank for the washing machines.

I left for the UofR the 27th of August, a Tuesday. We packed up the Volvo on Monday, and early Tuesday morning Mom and Dad and I drove up I-71, across the Thruway, and delivered me to the dorm. We unpacked the car that afternoon. Dad helped carry my things up to the room, but wouldn’t stay to watch me unpack. “We’ll go back to the motel,” he said. I choked back tears and started unpacking. I was terrified and already homesick. I wanted Ross, I wanted my own bedroom – other than camp, which was some five years previous, I never shared a room with anyone who wasn’t family. I wanted everything familiar. Mom and Dad stopped by later and we got dinner together. They dropped me back off at the dorm, and stayed overnight in a motel. Once I was back in my room for the night, I called Ross from the dial phone in the hall, to let him know I was in and gave him my new phone number. I missed him already.

Mom and Dad stopped by in the morning to say goodbye. They had to make the ten-hour drive back to Cincinnati. Mommer was still in the hospital, and they had plane tickets for a trip to see my brother Tom out in Oregon. I stood on the steps of the Student Union and watched my parents turn and walk back toward their car. It was a beautiful hot August day. The sun was bright in the sky, warmth radiated off the brick of the building, and the slight breeze was delightful relief. The sky was blindingly blue with white puffy clouds drifting over the tops of the campus buildings. I wanted to scream, “NO! DON’T GO! I’M NOT READY! TAKE ME HOME!” Instead I blinked back the tears, bit my lower lip, inhaled a deep breath through my nose, and, determined not to cry, turned and jerked open the glass door to the building and stepped inside. I needed to stand in line. I paused for a moment while my eyes adjusted from the bright outside to the dark interior. I discovered it was a short line, as the majority of the student body had not yet arrived. It was still freshman orientation week. I stood to have my photo taken and got my student ID which let me into my dorm, and got me my meals, and let me pay for junk food at the student run candy counter. Just like high school, but a ten-hour drive or a six-hour airplane adventure away from home and I didn’t know a soul.

Over the next fifteen (twenty?) years, I revisited that moment again and again. I wondered, what if I had screamed, “NO!” and gone back home with Mom and Dad? What if I hadn’t stayed? What if I hadn’t been so damned determined to be brave? Would Ross and I have gotten married? Would we have lasted beyond Thanksgiving that year? Would we have had children? Would I have attended Ross’ funeral, and stood at his gravesite with his family and friends, many of whom I never had the opportunity to know?

Instead, I live with the decisions I made, and the actions I took. I made new friends and I had fun. I lost my temper. I had my heart broken. I cried tears of loneliness, tears of grief, tears of fear. I got drunk. I made love. I broke more hearts. I learned to be alone. I made a life. I lost my balance more than once.

* * *

Our dorm was a ten story high rise, four six-person suites and two sets of double rooms per floor. I was on the sixth floor, “special interest” housing. The Inter-Class Living Center was decidedly not a freshman single-sex ghetto as so many of my friends from home were getting into. Instead, I lived on a co-ed floor, two male suites, two female suites, one set of male doubles, one set of female doubles. Thirty-two of us, sixteen freshmen, the rest were upperclassmen – sophomores to Seniors. It really was a great arrangement. Since the floor was co-ed and housed more experienced students, it never got too trashed, or rather when it did get trashed, people tended to clean up sooner than if it had been a true freshman ghetto. Also, because it was special-interest housing, we were required to have meetings once/month to plan and execute activities for our dorm and ourselves. That meant the floor residents really got to know each other pretty well.

Roz and I roomed together during orientation. She and I hit it off, and decided to stick together for the year. We sought out Mike, the floor president, to confirm we weren’t committing some terrible crime against housing. He laughed at our concern, and gave his blessing. We switched our room assignments (swapped the name tags on the doors) and unpacked our gear. So much for all that worry over the summer about who my roommate would be. Vivyan (with the thick accent whose apartment was in the flight pattern of Kennedy airport) and Cindy attended earlier summer orientations and were in for a surprise when they arrived over the weekend.

In our end-double with bunk beds, Roz liked the novelty of the top bunk. I really didn’t care. As a child I’d had my brothers’ old bunk beds and switched beds every few months. Sometimes the top bed, sometimes the lower bunk, sometimes I pulled them apart and used them as twins. After that decision, there we were, a short-haired mousy WASP brunette from the conservative Midwest, who billed herself as “the ultimate girl next door” in her housing application, sharing a room with a seemingly worldly Jewish blue-eyed blonde from Yonkers. I was suburban public high school, with Friday night football games and cheerleaders. She was East Coast private prep school with swim teams and water polo. What was I getting myself into?

Orientation was Wednesday-Friday, and classes wouldn’t start until the following Wednesday, September 4th. I had orientation events to contend with…How to choose and register for classes, tours of campus, how to navigate the shuttle bus system, awkward getting-to-know-you social occasions. I already got my student ID, but still needed to rent a post office box, and I couldn’t miss a chaperoned bus tour of the local shopping district.

One orientation activity was to take a busload of new students to the local “hip” shopping district, and send us on a scavenger hunt of sorts. They gave prizes for the best, or most unique, item purchased for under $5. The prize was $15 cash. I purchased a bunch of random things – a couple of bagels from a bagel shop, a few office supplies (pencils and the like) and once back at the dorms, decided to build, “The Bagel Bike.” I started in on the project, other folks wandered in to kibitz, and ultimately, that bagel bike won us money for pizza. I was “in”.

Orientation was over and it was Labor Day weekend. My friends at home were heading downtown to River Fest for the holiday. I’d gone with them in years previous, and while the crowds terrified me, I enjoyed the camaraderie. I would miss it this year.

Roz was inspired to personalize our room, and hoped to paint footprints on our dorm room walls. I said, “Sure, why not?” We found someone from the suite next door to take us out to the home improvement center to buy spray paint. Then back at the dorm, Roz traced her foot, we made a pattern, and together we got high on spray paint fumes while we painted primary color footprints on the walls and ceiling. Hadn’t I just done this? We even put a hopscotch board on the ceiling with black electrical tape, and glued a penny in the 8 square.

Ross called in the middle of our painting session and I had to cut him short. “Roz and I are working on a project, can I call you later?” Oh that felt awkward. I missed him terribly, but caught up in the moment, I didn’t have time for him. This was going to be harder than we thought.

“Yea, I guess. Glad you’re having fun.”

A cheap plastic rolling Roman shade covered our windows. Dusty and gross it didn’t block out the morning sun nearly well enough (we were both late sleepers), and we wanted to cover it. But we still wanted the footprint pattern so as to have continuity. It was a problem to be solved.

The suite adjacent to ours was called 6124’s. That was either the phone extension, or the official number of the suite in case of emergency, or both. It housed Mike, Rentz (aka Stephen Paul), J.G., Chris, Ken and Tony. Their common room was the “family room” of the floor. They had the bar, built in some year prior to my arrival, the television, and the open all night policy. It was the gathering place.

Stephen Paul, a junior optics major, was one of the fortunate few to have a car on campus. He drove a Land Yacht – an early ‘80s Mercury Marquis four-door, fully loaded. An only child from Watervliet, NY, (outside of Albany) his parents lived on Easy Street. Really. They petitioned to get the street name changed, and won, so their official postal address was 1 Easy Street. On Tuesday afternoon before classes started, he drove a group of us to the local mall to get out of the dorm, shop and stock up on supplies. While in the mall, I considered the footprints on our dorm room walls and asked, “Does anybody know where I can get felt?”

That started it. Stephen Paul, Chris, and Roz paused, stared at me, and laughed uproariously, guffawed even. I was clueless – I’m looking for the crafts store, what’s so funny? Sigh. The first of many quotes Stephen Paul kept in his private journal. I wonder if Ross might have laughed? I doubt it, he was accustomed to my blind blunders. He might have teased me a little – maybe jesting an intimate reply, “I know exactly where you can get felt.” I might have understood my gaffe and chewed ‘tardidly. But the guffaws threw me. I blushed and absent-mindedly chewed my tongue when someone finally stopped laughing enough to point out my unintentional double entendre.

We got back from our shopping trip (stacks of colored felt procured without further incident) and I had a message to call home. I called, and Mom informed me that Mommer passed away the day before, on Monday, the Labor Day holiday. Mom and Dad had flown out to Oregon, said hello to Tom, got the call from the hospital, boarded a plane and flew back home.

Ross had been with me when I last saw Mommer in the hospital. Now I was alone. Away from family, familiar friends, and no way to get home for the funeral service. I sat on the floor of the phone alcove and wished so much for Ross’ comforting presence. I called him at home and shared the sad news. He had been so patient with me and seemed to genuinely not mind going to visit her. In Rochester, I had no opportunity to grieve, classes were starting and my world started to spin.

* * *

Classes started Wednesday morning. I stopped at the post office in the afternoon, and found my first mail. It was from Ross.

Postmarked SEP 3’85

Cincinnati, OH

Sept. 1, 1985

Deer Soozin,

This is a tardid letter becuz this is a tardid terminal that I g0t al0ng time ag0 at W00ster that is from ab0ut 1969 and it sucks.

Encl0sed is X

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Encl0sed is the c0mplete st0ry on w0mbats.

Als0 s0me cart00ns….

And I th0ughT that y0u might want y0ur asprin case…..and s0me tapes!

M0MX says hell0. S0 d0es SK0T

I cann0t believe h0w much n0ise this thing makes.

Enough teletypewriter tardidness….

I felt strange going out with Steve last night because I sort of wanted to go dancing, but then again Steve is not exactly the person to go “cruising” with. Also, I’m not really ready yet. I would much prefer (obviously) to be doing something with you. And I don’t quite know how you feel about me seeing other people, etc… I know what you’ve said, sort of. I wish you would give me some guidance here. I mean I would like to go out + stuff, but I’m really not sure what you’re thinking on the subject is…. Is this confusing to you? Do you care what I think about your going out?

Whatever

I am not good at writing interesting letters like yours, sorry.

Watching Greg, Victor, Christopher, Adrian, Groteke, and Mojdehi get high the other night was not exactly an ideal way to spend Friday night. I need a FRIEND. Hard to find sometimes.

Don’t call yourself a bitch. Everybody does stuff like that. I know you are a very sensitive caring person and that I do the same kind of stuff to you. I also know you had one hell of a lot on your mind about going to school, etc. So please don’t call yourself a bitch because you may convince me one day.

I miss you a lot, but right now I can’t even remember what you’re like! Do you know what I mean? Our telephone conversation today did not sound like Susan Savage to me.

Query: Is there anyone you’ve found worth being romantically interested in? I would like to know as soon as (if) there is, even if it may not lead to anything, because it is much easier to deal with if I know something is starting, rather than, “There’s this guy I really like a lot…and we’ve been spending a lot of time together…” type deals.

Does this sound really possessive? I’m sorry. I can’t write “Light” letters. These are the things on my mind.

I need a companion.

You know, I really have no idea what you’ve been doing at school? Sort of a departure from this summer when we-both-knew-what-the-other-was-doing-at-every-waking-minute type attitude was more easily accomplished.

I am very anxious to:

start school

make friends

Get the PINTO fixed

Come see you. Here are the flight times:

Cin – Roch. (Friday) Roch – Cin (Sunday)

3:15 6:40 7:00 p.m. ?

I’ll probably just stay until Sunday – but we’ll see.

Very Sorry to hear about your grandma. I’ll go over tonight to see if there’s anything I can do for your parents.

Your pill Asprin case is enclosed. Sorry, we don’t have enough Asprin to fill it up!

Well, I’m going to finish this letter so I can send it.

I love you and I’ll talk to you soon!

Love,

Ross

Did I have anyone in particular that I was interested in? No. Were there several guys who were interested in me? Probably – but I was at school for all of what, a week? Ross knew I didn’t have to work hard to get attention. The male: female ratio was something like 2:1. Do the math!

I left my aspirin case? Hmmmph. I developed a habit with David and kept it ever since. I leave things behind when we part, my wallet usually, sometimes a sweatshirt or my shoes. When being dropped off at home, I said goodnight, got out of the car and climbed the stairs into the house without a second thought. The next day or several days later, or whenever I needed it, I called David, or he called me, or he stopped by to deliver my forgotten item, or I stopped by his house to retrieve the item. It got to be a joke after a while. I kissed David goodnight, and he said, “Got your wallet?” And I’d dig under the front passenger seat or get it out of the glove compartment. I’m sure a psychiatrist has an explanation for that behavior – fear of abandonment or not wanting to let go, or needing to return to the person. It couldn’t be as simple as forgetfulness. Just like David and Mark, I can’t tell you how many times Ross drove by the house to drop off my wallet, or sweater, or whatever that I had left in the car. I needed to leave something with Ross. I couldn’t leave my wallet, so I left a small plastic aspirin case that held twelve white pills. I wonder what else I left with him?

Long before Ross and I spent our wonderful summer together, I chose the University of Rochester not for the academics (as my GPA can attest) but for the male:female ratio, presence of a Greek sorority / fraternity system (of which I was never a part – those of us on the floor took a perverse pride in razzing anyone who might choose to pledge a Greek house), presence of ROTC, a ten-hour drive from home, and finally, when I visited campus the previous fall, I noted that the women on campus all seemed to need to lose ten pounds or more. Not the best reasons to choose a college, eh? But I was having fun making bagel bikes, painting footprints, getting in squirt gun fights and getting felt. With peers surrounding me twenty-four hours a day, I was a social butterfly.

* * *

I brought more than a few childhood mementos with me to school. Of course I brought a photo of Ross, a Polaroid of him being Dum. Some favorite Bloom County comic strips, a drawing of Milo and Opus that Mark made, and a funny postcard from my brother Jack of an obese woman peeing on the beach. I kept photos of friends – Valli, Julie and Erin and David (a rare one of David without his beard) and arranged it all on the corkboard at the back of the desk. On the desktop I put my mini-stereo with tiny removable speakers (the tape player recorded, supposedly to record lectures and listen to them again) new technology at the time. Having no stereo, much less a turntable, I brought no records, only a few tapes I had been brave enough to purchase; Pink Floyd, Simon & Garfunkle’s Greatest Hits, James Taylor, and The Who, Face Dances. Ross recorded a couple of Joe Jackson and some Go-Go’s, and would soon send me a few others.

On the shelf above the desk, I arranged the select few stuffed animals I brought, a favorite teddy bear, a stuffed dog my grandfather gave me, and the Opuses that were gifts from Ross and his Mom. Included in my mini-menagerie was a treasured stuffed beaver puppet my parents bought for me at the Appalachian Festival when I was a little girl, maybe I was ten or even as old as twelve. It was handmade and expensive at the time, so a special treat. My goal at the time was to collect a Noah’s ark full of stuffed animals, one of every species (dog, cat, bear, camel, hedgehog, fish, beaver, llama, etc). My father finally agreed to buy the puppet on the premise that MIT has the beaver on their school crest. “Nature’s Engineer” is what Dad (an MIT alumnus) told me.

In the lounge of 6124’s, a half-dozen floor-mates, mostly male, huddled together watching television, conversing around the noise of whatever was broadcast. No one remembers the exact topic now, but relevant to the conversation at hand, and at an appropriate time, I said, “Oh, I have a beaver!” and promptly trotted off to my room to retrieve this puppet. Well, you can just imagine…six guys first started laughing that I said out loud, “I have a beaver.” They were further inspired when I actually produced “Nature’s Engineer.” They did unspeakably rude things to/with my treasured puppet and it really got waaaay out of hand. Just imagine five males between the ages of 18 and 22, and what they can do with a beaver puppet and a broken off hockey stick they called a “Fuck Stick.” I got frustrated that no one noticed how hurt I was, and went back to my room upset. In retrospect, they still believe the incident was very funny. But at the time, I really hadn’t wanted unspeakably rude things done to my treasured transitional object. They did eventually apologize, and I begrudgingly accepted their humility.

I still have that puppet. For a long time I kept it in a basket with other childhood plush toys in my son’s room. One day when he was about three, he pawed through the basket and for whatever reason grew afraid of it (he’s a smart kid!), so today it sits in a basket in our bedroom. That beaver will never be a child's toy again!

* * *

I always listened to the music of the men of my life. In the late 70s and early 80s I visited my eldest brother Jack at college. His roommates played the Knack and Devo. Impressionable as I was, I thought those bands were cool. David and Christopher listened to Pink Floyd. In the evenings we lay on the floor of Christopher’s room above the garage and put on album after album. Dark side of the moon, Wish you were here, The Wall. In a more jovial daylight mood, they quizzed me, making a game to see how quickly I could recognize the album and track. The Who and Queen were staples in my high school. Heck, they were probably staples in most high schools for that time frame, the early 1980s.

But driving around the city late at night, David tuned the radio to the local college station that picked up an NPR jazz show. I dozed as he drove through the night, comfortable in the passenger seat, enjoying the soothing strains that emanated from the speakers on the dash. I didn’t mind that he drove just to feel the speed and force as he took curvy roads too fast through the hills around Cincinnati. Finally, he returned me home, turned off the radio, we kissed and he shooed me inside. I forgot my wallet under the seat or in the glove box and called him later to retrieve it.

Then later, when I drove the Pinto with Mark riding shotgun, I had two tapes for the cassette deck, Face Dances and Wish you were here. David and Christopher had given me a gift. I actually enjoyed a little Floyd, and Mark was impressed with my selection. Although Mark was angrier and listened to noisier punk bands, he reminded me that The Pretenders were a particular favorite of his and Scott’s. I’d forgotten. No wonder I enjoyed Bart’s music collection when we met.

But Ross had the biggest selection by far. I became accustomed to asking, “Can you play the one that goes dum-dum-dum da-da-da?” and he pulled it out and put it on the player. My own personal DJ. When we were pen-pals, long before we ever started dating, his letters were full of musical references of the day; U2, Squeeze, Psychedelic Furs, Rush, Kinks. Then later, after we were inseparable, I discovered his true passions, Joe Jackson, Pat Metheny, Chaka Khan, Phil Collins and Genesis, and a private admiration for Neil Diamond. I was sworn to secrecy for that last one. What twenty-year old male in 1985 was willing to go public with his admiration of Neil Diamond??

That’s probably why I gravitated to Mike’s room with Stephen Paul and Chris. Like Ross, Mike was an album accumulator and the conversation that afternoon was music. Mike was enthralled with the latest band he discovered that summer, Marillion, and we were being educated. The topic eventually turned to Genesis, Pink Floyd and the Who. Well, thank you David and Ross. I knew these bands. I knew the albums, I knew the lyrics, I knew the esoteric information of which only male adolescents are otherwise aware. Thanks to my buddies in high school, I was able to not only participate in that conversation, but “enlighten” those around me. It made an impression on them I guess…Chris remembers it all these years later. (Correction – he remembers not the actual conversation about music, but rather a conversation he and Mike and Stephen Paul had later in the dining hall. He reports that all were impressed with how I had held my own in their conversation.)

What I find funny, is that while I was competent in several genres, including espousing the virtues of Joe Jackson and Pat Metheny. I was completely ignorant of Bruce Springsteen or Elton John. Evidently there is a distinction between Who fans and Springsteen fans. The two definitely did not mix. Not often anyway, and certainly not in collegiate male album collections in the mid-80s. I know the stereo wars later on got very loud. “Born in the USA” versus “Won’t get fooled again” or “Born to Run” versus “Substitute” or “My Generation”. It got vicious. One of the guys in the triple upstairs was a fan of Olivia Newton-John and cranked her “Physical” album over and over very loudly. The musical mix could be disconcerting at times.

As I look back at it, that whole musical mix, I recognize that I married yet another album accumulator who still plays DJ on occasion. I also realize that it’s long past time for me to claim more music for my own. I always borrowed the sounds of others. I need to pick and choose and play my own music. But try as I might, I still cling to the music of others. I bought some John Denver, reminiscent of my father’s favorites. He taught himself to play Denver’s hits on the guitar when I was young and he was in his 30s. The music is soothing, a comfort from my childhood. Likewise are the story songs of Jim Croce and Harry Chapin, both men wooing audiences with their sad stories accompanied by guitar. Coincidentally, (or not) all three performers died untimely accidental deaths at the prime of their careers.

* * *

As soon as the students moved in and all the parents were gone, a construction crew closed off the driveway along the dorms. They would build a new parking lot – reconfigure the drive, add more parking spaces. The contractors arrived early, 7 or 8 in the morning. Sometimes their noise woke me up, so I dragged myself out of bed and watched from our window. The machinery was fascinating and I found it peaceful and relaxing to watch them work. First they tore up the old roadway, shovels cracking the asphalt and filling dump trucks with load after load. Other machines pulled out the curbstones and stacked them for re-use. I was amazed to learn that in Rochester and Western New York, curbs are made of granite. I don’t know where it was quarried, but new curbs were delivered in 4-6 foot lengths and backhoes excavated about six feet down in order to place the slabs. Where I grew up, curbs are built up out of wooden forms, and poured concrete or asphalt. I’m not at home anymore, am I?=ce��

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