#also the thing i mentioned about how i hold back my own opinions until someone else affirms im not wrong

[inf1nyxw0rlds]

another thing abt me is that i get so embarrassed by the natural process of like... saying something and having someone reply with their own opinion that does alter my own and then i feel 1. like a humiliated moron, and 2. like a hypocrit for changing my stance even though that's literally. a normal thing to do when given information or a point of view you did not have/consider previously

[imagining-in-the-margins]

A Perfect Day (S.R.)

Summary: Spencer and Reader spend a fall day together. A/N: This is an excerpt from my series, Here to Misbehave! Couple: Spencer Reid/Fem!Reader Category: Fluff Content Warning: Halloween mentions, Spencer!POV Word Count: 2.6k

MASTERLIST

Autumn has widely been considered the season of change. It is an understandable characterization; from the shifting hues of the leaves to the wildly fluctuating temperatures, few things stayed consistent in the fall. Perhaps that’s why someone who loathes change, someone like me, finds the season so thrilling.

It’s like the Earth and the Sun made a pact to make changes more predictable in their own unique, chaotic way. The breeze becomes biting and the days become shorter, but for these downfalls, we are granted a beauty and calmness that can’t be rivaled by any other season.

But my love wasn’t a season, and when asked where I'd rather direct my attention and appreciation, there were few choices that were easier to make.

“Spencer. You’ve got to be kidding me.”

Her face was half covered by the cup she held tightly with both hands, but I could picture the hidden expression perfectly, regardless.

“What? We don’t have to agree on everything.”

The offered truce was received poorly; her response a heavy scoff and a shake of her head. I tried to follow along with her suddenly heated words but couldn’t contain the stars in my eyes that often accompanied my daydreams. If she did notice, she stubbornly ignored the adoration.

“I understand you’re a genius or whatever, but I think your opinions on cider and cocoa are… wrong. They are wrong.”

It was my turn to feign displeasure (I hoped hers wasn’t real, anyway). I clutched tighter to my own drink that I found myself defending on a park bench with dozens of strangers as an audience.

“An opinion can’t be wrong!” I chirped, only hating a little bit the way my voice jumped. After all, it was hard to hate it when it made her giggle. But despite how much sweeter the liquid seemed when I drank it in the presence of her smile, I also knew that she wouldn’t appreciate my immediate agreement. So, I pushed back just a little, “It can be misguided or ignorant but not outright wrong.”

“Unless it’s yours, on this topic,” she shot back without hesitation.

I tried to flash her a pout, hoping that maybe it would work for me like it did for her. It did not. Her eyebrows shot up and her jaw dropped open with another laugh, and I decided that I preferred that outcome, anyway.

The longer my bottom lip stuck out, the wider her smile got. I waited to stop until her eyes closed and turned away, just long enough to let the full force of my affection show.

She saw it, anyway, in the form of a similar smile spread over my face when I softly admitted, “Fine. You’re right.”

“Oh, I know.”

Her tongue peeked between her lips, and I found myself thinking less of cider and cocoa and more about how unbelievably lucky I was to find someone that I never felt the need to prove anything to. A person that didn’t care if I held all the answers.

I might’ve continued down that sappy train of thought, but it was hard to do while she hoisted herself halfway over the table to try and grab hold of my cup right as I went to drink from it.

Of course, she had failed to take into account just how big the table was, and just how close I was willing to come to falling before I let her drink from my cup right after she’d criticized my preference of fall flavors.

For a second, I really thought she might climb onto the table to win, but the judgmental looks from the parents in the park must have beaten her desire to win. As forlorn as humanly possible, she fell back into her seat with a loud “Hmph!” which really only managed to elicit an equally immature giggle from me.

“Shut up,” she laughed before shoving my paper plate toward my chest, “And eat your stupid pie.”

All I could think as she grabbed my fork and stabbed the middle of the piece to try to lift the entire thing at once, was that I was right about one thing: Autumn, in all its vitality and beauty, could still never compare to her.

That thought persisted through the pumpkin patch, growing in intensity as she skipped through the vine-laden path like a regular fall fairy. It was much easier to get lost in her there, crouched and inspecting foliage. Her arguments regarding gourds were much less spirited, with her watching me wide-eyed and curious as I explained the stages of pumpkin growth and all the different uses for the fruit.

I still let her make the final choices, opting to analyze her selections and tease her for them later, instead. That was the plan, anyway, to continue the competitiveness lest she gets bored with me before the day was over. When she walked past me holding open the passenger side door, I thought it might’ve already happened.

But then she just placed the pumpkin into my hands so she could open the back door. Before I could even move, she carefully removed it from my arms again and placed it in the seat.

“What are you doing?” I said through an amused chuckle.

She was decidedly not entertained by my confusion, stopping to turn to me with a bored, frustrated expression.

“I’m buckling him in,” she explained slowly, like I might need the help. Then, to add insult to silly injury, she added, “Duh.”

I was too distracted by the details to tackle the absurdity of it all.

“Him? It’s a boy pumpkin?”

“Obviously. Look at him,” she snorted, finally clicking the seat belt in before tenderly petting the top of the lucky little gourd. Once she was convinced it would be as safe as she could make it, she allowed me to begin to escort her into her proper seat.

“You know it’s safer on the floor, right?” I asked before she’d slipped past me. I wrapped an arm around her, pulling her away from the car so I could enjoy the warmth of her before it was replaced with the dry air of the engine.

“How dare you,” she balked with an open mouth that was just begging to be kissed. By the time I got close enough to try, though, her hand fervently shoved my cheek away.

I tried to laugh, but she used the same hand to cover the noise, trying and failing to convince me she was being serious.

“Why don’t you just hold him?” I mumbled against her palm.

That was enough for her to abandon my embrace altogether. With a scoff and a roll of her eyes, she pried my arms off of her and finally made her way to my passenger seat. I didn’t fight her too hard, even taking the time to shut her door like my mother always insisted I should.

The mercy was not returned, with her eyes narrowed into a playful disbelieving glare that I hadn’t seen in some time. I took a moment to appreciate the memory before she'd interrupted the thought with a new one.

“If this is any indication of how you’ll be with a human baby, I have dramatically overestimated your competence,” she droned, obviously unaffected by the stars that appeared in my eyes every time I looked at her.

“The one and only time you’ll ever be able to say those words. I hope you enjoyed it,” I joked. A funny enough joke that she couldn’t help but smile through her facade.

“Don’t worry,” she chuckled, “I did.”

The day could have ended there, and it would have been enough. But I think we were trying to prolong the high of the perfect day, finding even the faintest interest in an activity as enough of an excuse for a detour on our way home.

… Which was probably how we found ourselves in our third park of the day. After all, I loved any autumnal vision, so how could I decline an opportunity to let them serve as a backdrop for watching her?

And that was an accurate description of how I spent the day. It might sound boring, and if it were anyone else, it probably would have been. But no matter how often I saw her, I found myself learning new things about her every single time. Each freckle and scar became a part of the high-definition collection of memories that I would never let myself forget. The most beautiful images that kept me sane in the face of evil and filth.

“Do you see that?”

For a moment, I thought she might have read my mind. But then I realized that her eyes were still fixed forward, stuck on the horizon ahead of us.

“See what?”

“That,” she pointed, “Right there.”

My eyes followed the line, finding nothing but an area of carefully manicured, yellow grass and trees already set to rest for the season. It must have been clear to her that I was lost, because her pointing became more animated and her voice rose as she shouted, “Right there!”

“The giant pile of leaves?”

“Uh-huh.”

Then, in all of my obliviousness, I just sort of stared. Even when her hand grew tighter around mine and her feet started to move faster, I didn’t put two and two together until it was too late.

“What about— No!” I shouted, cutting off my own train of thought and only barely letting go of her in time to watch her jump straight into the collection of fallen foliage that some poor landscaper had obviously worked hard to gather.

I have to believe that even if that unlucky, underappreciated individual saw what she’d done to their hours of work, that they would forgive her. It was hard to feel anything but joy at the sounds that came from the pile. Yet I approached her cautiously, with both hands in my pockets to avoid the urge to throw myself into danger with her.

“You’re a terror,” I said, settling for a crouched position in front of her. Still able to see her but far enough from her grasp that she had to crawl through a wall of leaves to come nose to nose with me.

“This is literally the scariest thing you’ve done all season," I said.

“Come on in, the water’s fine,” she purred.

As enticing as the offer was, my mind was too preoccupied with statistics of spider and snake bites, not to mention the possibility of ticks still scouring the landscape for any last second hosts. The answer was easy.

“Absolutely not.”

With another exhale of pure displeasure, she threw her body back into the leaves, burying herself into a mess of yellows and reds that somehow only made her look even more beautiful. The chaotic scene matched her energy well, and the harm she was doing was minimal considering I was absolutely going to search every inch of skin for any marks later.

The only thing that was more appealing to me than watching her make an absolute fool out of herself in a pile of leaves was the intense urge to tease her about it. So, taking a regrettable seat on the grass, I sighed, “I think I’m going to have to arrest you for trespassing.”

There was a loud gasp from the center of the pile, followed by a scuffle of flailing limbs among the foliage.

“You don’t own this leaf pile! I do! I am queen of the leaf pile!” she screeched.

“Alright Princess,” I subtly corrected, “whatever you say.”

As promised, I didn’t put up a fight. Even when she finally got a hold of my hands and dragged me into the madness with her. I followed her no matter what nonsense she demanded, just as she had with me so many times. Granted, my desires weren’t nearly as dangerous or strange. They were pretty much just a collection of foreign films and reading that always lulled her to sleep.

But that day there was no sign of her energy waning. The early sun faded and we kept going. I’m not sure how, but she managed to enjoy herself in the D.C. landscape of bars and blaring car horns. Her joy became even more obvious when we'd stumbled upon a crowd of very drunk women who had insisted we join their haunted tour of the city.

“Are you scared?” she whispered into my ear.

The feeling of her warm breath against my skin caused a shiver to run down my spine, ruining any credibility I had in my response.

“No. Why would I be scared? It’s just history.”

“Are you sure?” she asked again.

“Yes!” I insisted with the worst possible timing. Because just as soon as the word had left my lips, I felt the distinct sensation of fingers running down my neck and arm opposite to her. I was so convinced that’s what it was that I even spun around with a yelp, crashing into at least three different people just to find a very startled woman with the worst hung scarf I’d ever seen.

My love had already put two and two together and was lost in an absolute fit of laughter. There were already tears forming in the corners of her eyes as she doubled over, barely able to stand through it all. Because there I was, her nearly middle aged FBI agent boyfriend, screaming over a scarf.

“Laugh it up,” I droned.

And she did. She kept laughing through any attempts at a response, and after the initial embarrassment wore off, I couldn’t help but join her.

“I hope you know you chose me. You chose this man!” I shouted, gesturing to the people around us who had already forgotten about our shenanigans, “And everyone knows it!”

“I’m sorry I can’t—” she wheezed, pausing to take a necessary breath that was all lost with another bunch of giggles “—You’re a fucking FBI Agent!”

“Well I can’t shoot a ghost, can I?” I mumbled through the hit to my ego. But any suffering was quickly dealt with as she threw dramatic arms around my waist, pulling me close and protecting me from any other errant scarves that might show up.

“I love you so much,” she said.

“I’m glad you’re having fun,” I returned with a quick kiss on her forehead. And even if I implied otherwise, I think she knew that I was having just as good of a time as she was. In fact, it was one of the most relaxing days of my life, which was saying something, considering how much walking was involved.

But no matter how tired we both were, I still had one last place to take her. The final destination for us to rest our heads and reminisce over a day spent cycling through every autumnal activity. Just one more place to end the day.

Home, I thought as I looked at her. All there was left to do was go home.

The perfect end to the perfect day.

Want more? This blurb is actually an excerpt of my existing work, Here to Misbehave! Check out the series masterlist here!

[hyukalyptus]

nsfw alphabet - hueningkai ! - cw. some mention of spanking (paddles/whips) in k, r, and t.

a = aftercare (what they’re like after sex) - biggest snuggle bug. i think he'd be too lazy to rly clean up even, just reaches for a t-shirt off the ground to clean y'all up a bit, then grabs u to snuggle, either spooning u and rubbing ur ass or ur laying on his chest :3

b = body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s) - ooooh ykw, i've never thought about what his favorite body part on himself is. probably his chest? i feel like he's pretty proud of his broad chest, and ofc fave body part on u is ur tummy

c = cum (anything to do with cum) - hm..likes stuffing it back inside u after it drips out

d = dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs) - rly wants to beg for a devil's threeway but is way too nervous ><

e = experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?) - ykw. i'd say average..? like he's had a few partners, maybe one or two one night stands, but definitely not a ~player~ he knows what he's doin!! very very good at making u feel good. i feel like he's the kind that's hyper aware of what the other person is feeling and is always trying to prioritize them.

f = favorite position - missionary (the jiggle)

g = goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.) - oh my god i think he's so fun during sex! i think he doesn't take it too seriously, but still understands the intimacy of it. like he does not get held up by the little things. likes trying new things and giggling at things with u during sex. ugh. so hot.

h = hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.) - i genuinely think he's a pretty hairy guy and keeps it that way.

i = intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect) - full on sweepin ya off ur feet. knows all the right buttons to press to turn u on, knows exactly what to say, knows how to say them, etc.

j = jack off (masturbation headcanon) - pillow humper.

k = kink (one or more of their kinks) - feel like he loves spanking ya a lil harder than most, like he loves paddles and whips with feathers, etc., and ice.

l = location (favorite places to do the do) - the bed. or shower for hand stuff.

m = motivation (what turns them on, gets them going) - what u wear! loves seeing ur body exposed ofc, but loves when you love what ur wearing, just thinks its such a turn on to have someone comfortable in their own skin and clothes lol

n = no (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs) - i don't think he loves the "please stop" or "no!!" kinda stuff. like if u say no or stop, he gonna stop. doesn't like messin around with that.

o = oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.) - loves receiving :p think he's a whiny mess, especially licking his balls OMG. as far as skill.. he's a munch. gets all slow and sensual with it too.

p = pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.) - somewhere in the middle (with penetration at least), like he's not overly rough, but likes a nice rhythm to it.

q = quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.) - not his fave. might have one in a dressing room backstage to get hyped up but that's about it.

r = risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.) - yes! i think he'd definitely be down to experiment. he'd be a lot more wary of any "painful" stuff but since he loves spanking so much, he'll try them, just super super cautious.

s = stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?) - i'd say he could last a while if he wanted, but gets kinda impatient. can definitely hold it off until u cum first though.

t = toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?) - has absolutely no problem with them whatsoever, just doesn't have a lot himself. likes paddles and whips like i said, but doesn't have a ton of the other kinds of toys. would definitely use one if u wanted. and maybe he's got a pocket pussy somewhere around here.... but honestly prefers his hand.

u = unfair (how much they like to tease) - not a tease imo.

v = volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.) - WHINY WHINY WHINY and grunty .

w = wild card (a random headcanon) - LOVES it when u pull his hair. like literally can't even do it in public or he'll moan.

x = x-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes) - longer than average. kinda veiny.

y = yearning (how high is their sex drive?) - lower than normal ig ? idk i don't have an incredibly high sex drive myself and i see myself a lot in him so maybe that's where im coming from, but probably cums...once every 3 days at least?

z = zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards) - love love loves a good nap right after he cums. like i said, just kinda grabs whatever t-shirt or towel he can find to wipe y'all asap to get to cuddling and napping <3

[alicerosejensen]

Warning: unhealthy relationship; Dark; not a yandere Leon but almost; the reader has no family and friends; Rescuer syndrome (if you look really closely at the very beginning); mentions of alcohol; Dom!Leon; fem/reader; Older!Leon; Mentions of pregnancy;

Summary: He will love you until his death. You are his and no one else's.

A/N: English is not my native language, so I apologize for any mistakes. Also I don't approve of this crap in real life and if it triggers you, please look at the warning again and skip it. Just because I write doesn't mean it's cool in real life. Build only healthy relationships based on mutual love, trust, compromises without violence.

If you look closely, neither of you two were healthy enough to build a relationship.

Of course you're not a pet. Even if you is devoted to him like a dog whose owner is drowning on the Titanic, and Leon has long been sinking. Of course, he does not consider you an animal and he is sincerely sorry that because of your injuries you cling to him, and he, in turn, succumbs to the selfish desire to keep his girl close to him.

You were so young and alone that, apparently due to your childhood traumas, you sought love from someone who tried to cope with his traumas with the help of alcohol. Leon didn't think he should have touched you at all. In his opinion, everything he touches turns to shit, and he didn't mean to hurt you at all. Besides, he believed that seducing such a young girl, even if you are of age, is almost a crime, however, he could not stop being drawn to you. My God, he’s already turning 40 and you’re a little over 20. Do girls your age hang out with such old men? You should find a young guy with whom you can do all sorts of stupid things while being on the same wavelength, and not cling to his back like a lost child. But in general, it’s not really a fact, but just an observation, but lonely people often have pets to while away their unbearable loneliness. Leon does not have the opportunity to get a dog or a cat, his job means that he spends little time at home, but...

At night, you sleep soundly, throwing your leg over him and reaching out with your arms to hug him. Leon catches himself thinking that he likes to listen to measured breathing and feel the soft skin on his body. His sweet girl... in your sleep you feel how other people's fingers are drawing patterns on your back and you fucking like it. Don’t care about studying, which can open the door to the world of a good career with a decent salary, love into which you dive headfirst is the most beautiful thing that has happened in your life.

And you are ready to hold on to him until the last... Well, actually, just like he does to you.

It’s deep night outside, the bedroom is in wireless darkness, which Leon is so afraid of because of painful memories, but why is he calm now when you’re sleeping so quietly next to him.

"Bunny?" Leon rarely calls you that, but those cute pajamas of yours with the bunny ears on the tank top make him smile, kissing your forehead because your sleep, unlike him, is quite sound.

In fact, he feels like a son of a bitch who sleeps with a girl half his age and, to Leon’s own horror, it’s not even lust. He himself doesn’t fully understand what kind of crap is happening to him, but the point is that he really feels for you... high feelings. At least every day it becomes more and more difficult to let you out of his arms.

But you're sleeping. An absolute angel and Leon wonders if he can mistake your compassion for love? Or do you just have daddy issues? Thinking about this, Leon grins, burying his nose in your hair. He has his faithful “Matilda” in his bedside table, and, in theory, he has nothing to fear, but he is unlikely to be able to live with such crap as before 1998. You planted an obsession for him, gradually nurturing and strengthening it, like a caring gardener painstakingly working on his favorite flower. You yourself cling to him, adjoining him, you are even ready to give up all prospects for your future life for the sake of him alone.

Leon kisses you and strokes your cheek with his thumb, pressing you to his chest, finally closing his eyes and falling into sleep.

Actually, Leon thinks that it’s all your fault. Who if not you?! It’s like you’re deliberately making him worry by putting the phone on silent or calling him back too late, which is why he gradually seems to lose his mind if he can’t be sure that everything is okay. He screams and you cry and apologize to him because you are afraid that he will leave you alone. This is your biggest fear, even if Leon had nothing like that in his thoughts. For heaven's sake, he really hates your tears and he hates feeling guilty about it even more.

"Just don't make me worry anymore" He asks in a soothing tone, pressing your trembling body to him.

And you nod your head, feeling how painful your stomach is from the stress you have experienced and your conflict with him.

"I'll never again...I swear"

You are a stone on his neck, which he in theory can throw off but does not want to. What's going on with you two is clearly not normal. This is immediately noticed by Claire watching how you loyally sit next to him and seem to be interested in nothing but Leon. Seriously, of course, few people from her inner circle like a secular reception, but Claire really thinks it's very strange.

"She's…" Redfield notices your discomfort when Leon walks away to talk to her. However, he himself constantly turns around to look after you while you are nervously sitting at a table with a half-empty glass looking at him with deer eyes. "How old is she? In my opinion, you don't really look like a guy who…indulging in young girls"

Leon squints into Claire's eyes. In truth, part of him realizes that she is saying a clever thought and the other begins to howl unbearably, because you are really the nicest thing that has happened in the last years of his life. So why the hell should he constantly give up his human happiness just because it allegedly does not fit into the worldview of other people?!

"I'm not keeping her forcibly next to me," he replied rudely, and Claire shuddered at the unusual cold tone, "She can leave if she wants to, but she doesn't want to."

Well, who will look after you if even all your loved ones have abandoned you?

The Redfields look disapproving, and when Leon returns to the table in a bad mood, they both see you clinging to his hand, anxiously flapping your eyes, calming down only when he quickly kisses you on the cheek and runs his palm over your back. However, Leon has never really hurt you. After a while, Claire even gets used to this abnormal connection between her friend and his young girlfriend, only rolls her eyes when she sees that Leon constantly sends you messages, checking how well you took care of yourself while he was away.

"She has problems with dad" is a fair conclusion, which Leon deliberately ignored, without commenting on it in any way.

And it wasn't even untrue. With Leon's help, you unconsciously compensated for what you were not given as a child, in turn, Leon himself treated himself with your presence. Because he knows for sure that when he wakes up, you will be next to him in bed, and you will not run away while he sleeps, leaving a paper airplane with traces of scarlet lipstick on his lips and a short signature "See you later", along with the fading scent of perfume in the room. He doesn't need to worry about where you are in the evening, because you are either in the living room watching TV, or in the bedroom, or in the kitchen. No matter what you are doing, the main thing is in his field of vision. If he need to call out to you, then you will respond, and this is the most important thing for him - to know that you are always in close proximity to him.

With each passing year, his control grows, building strict rules.

There is no point in listing them, and Leon knows that you would not violate anything even if you knew nothing about them. Mostly it was just for peace of mind. You walk only with him, don’t lift weights, communicate with strangers to a minimum and... yes, you don’t go to college anymore, because he doesn’t always have time to pick you up from there after classes, well, you can’t say that you were completely against it . There were already enough missed classes for this to become a problem. Anyone's problem but not yours, because...

“I will support you perfectly. My credit card is at your disposal, buy whatever you want or wait for me, sweetheart"

You weren’t a shopaholic, but sometimes you indulged in expensive purchases. Leon never objected.

They took care of you, you didn’t have to study or work, you could sleep until lunchtime, the only important thing was to remain an obedient girl for your Leon, who was too fixated on you. No normal person would consider what was happening to be normal, when you literally cannot leave the house without someone else’s permission. Should you walk to the store for groceries or just a short jog in the morning? Strictly prohibited! Of course you can with Leon, because in his opinion he is a guarantee that everything will be fine with you as long as he is around. You won’t be attacked by some crazy person or a rabid dog, he will carefully check the expiration date on the packages so that his bunny doesn’t get poisoned and other little things that were completely absurd.

It’s remarkable that you were an obedient girl, because your subconscious said that if you make even the slightest mistake, the retribution would be terrible, only the fear was not because of physical violence (no, he doesn’t beat you at all) but because you were afraid that Leon would find yourself another girlfriend, leaving you to choke on your own love or even kill yourself.

Although Leon didn’t threaten to break up with you at all. All lovers quarrel, but you were literally shaking with fear that everything would end, as if the sky would fall to the ground or the sun would stop shining, destroying all living things. No, of course Leon wouldn’t leave you, because his love is no less sick than yours. So his fear is that you'll probably realize he's too old for you, as Claire tells him, and leave for a younger guy. Leon simply cannot tolerate this shit, so he locks you in his house. And still you don't mind.

Leon knows everything his angel likes, from food to your favorite color, which can change depending on your mood. Unlike you, he himself was quite secretive, but you knew well some of his preferences and how to behave when his self-esteem fell through the roof after yet another death at work. Sometimes it was necessary to sit quietly in the next room, but more often just sit on his lap, stroke his head and kiss him. Kiss a lot.

And yet Leon was afraid that you would find a replacement for him.

Therefore, it was necessary to tie you to him so that no one could ever take you away from him. And the only option that Leon saw was to become a father.

“Are you serious?! Damn it, what’s happening to you?! Did she really so calmly agree to conceive a child with you?!”

For God's sake, the way Claire screams makes Leon's ears pop. In fact, only he planned, with only one goal to make you stay with him and fulfill his old dream of a family. But he will say that this was discussed with you and, in fact, you and he even managed to argue about names and what color you would decorate the nursery, which of course was not true, but Claire and others don’t need to know about it.

Leon didn’t even bring up this topic of conversation with you, he just pierced a few with a condoms and, fortunately for him, the result did not take long to arrive. With the first signs, Leon immediately knew that the pregnancy tests would show a positive result and yet he takes care of you when vomit turns your stomach. Like a caring daddy who collects your hair at the back of your head while you spew out everything you’ve eaten and strokes your back, supporting you. A warm blanket, a dim light, a pat on your stomach? It's all for you, baby, and for this little pea inside of you. Leon suppresses a grin, believing that his plan has worked... which is really the case.

"Oh, sweetheart, I hope it's tears of joy, because you don't have a single reason to cry anymore," Leon says when he looks at you crying sitting on the toilet lid, hugging his shoulder, and a positive test is lying on the floor next to you.

Complete shit, but you were crying literally because you were afraid that he would definitely leave now. Fortunately, luck, as you naively believed, has not left you.

Leon did everything to ensure that his little American dream and family were safe under his complete control. Firstly, he immediately said that his child needed more space, although the apartment was spacious enough and the three of them could live here in peace, especially since there was a park nearby, but Leon needed a house. The one that no one will stick their nose into, although in fact, despite the quarrel with Claire and the others, he is thinking of inviting them to the birth of a child. And he's not going to completely isolate you from others. Courses for young mothers, the same walks with a stroller near the house, it was necessary, especially since the baby and mom need fresh air.

You are required to obey and strictly follow all the doctor's recommendations as before. Of course, Leon takes you to all prenatal appointments to make sure that everything is fine, it gives him an unprecedented delight to be next to you at the first ultrasound. Damn, baby, you have to give him a girl! Although he wasn't against the boy.

It is noteworthy that you have never said a word against. After all, everything was fine with you: huge care, a new big house with a small extension for a playground in the backyard, which hinted at the obvious fact that this is your first child with Leon, but not the last. However, how much love he gives you while you are pregnant compensates for all the ailments!

And when you finally give birth, Leon, of course, next to you meets his sweet girl, whose fate, as he thinks, can only be envied. At least now you won’t leave him anywhere, but will forever remain with you and next to you, cherishing your little girl whom he is going to spoil just like her mommy. Leon will put the crib next to the bed, make a new schedule and take a million photos of his happy family.

He adores you and that's all you need. In the end, Leon even admits to himself that he didn’t need the child as much as you, and only Claire and Chris seem to see how abnormal this relationship is.

Only Leon doesn't care anymore.

And you too.

[runningfrom2am]

requiem // part six

summary: according to coriolanus snow, his best friend had the most beautiful voice in all of panem. she had been training her whole life constantly to get where she was; being up for a residency at the most elite opera house in all of panem. singing was her passion. her true love; and when that got stripped from her in a second, his world became a whole lot quieter. he loathed every minute of it.

pairing: coriolanus snow x fem!reader

wc: 2.6k

masterlists / nav / requests

tags/warnings: opera singer!mentor!reader (blink and you'll miss it), she's kind of a prodigy!! p cool imo, mute!reader, bestfriend!coryo, friends to lovers trope ooo, mentions of graphic violence early on (particularly the prologue) but after that it's pretty safe, depictions of ptsd/trauma, mental illness and minor suicidal ideation but at least she's not entirely alone, descriptions of minor medical treatments and use of medication.

a/n: omg hi i am finally back with a new part for this series!! kind of a filler but idk i still think it's cute :) enjoy!

also, reminder to follow @runningfrom2am-library and turn on my notifications there to join my taglist for this series!!

my asks are also open to talk about this series! (i do have emoji anons open now too!)

send me any and all of your thoughts! here!

series masterlist // playlist // pinterest board

two years earlier

"So, I'm thinking balloons over the whole ceiling of the foyer, gold and red- thoughts?" Your mother asks as you enter the threshold of your family's lake house.

"You say that like you haven't already ordered everything." You giggle in response, footsteps echoing across the tile as you step off the carpet of the grand entryway.

It was less of a "house" and more of a mansion, in Coriolanus' opinion.

He had been here countless times throughout the years and sporadically would spend the weekends here with you and your parents when you didn't want to be "bored" and "lonely" on the large lakefront property. Poor you, he always thought sarcastically, but would never voice it.

Regardless, he loved getting to come out here with you in the summers and occasionally for a day or two over the holidays when you could skate on the frozen lake. You had taught him how yourself, holding onto his hands at nine years old and skating backward in front of him while he channeled the look of a baby deer taking its first steps. Your little laugh and small words of encouragement were the only thing that kept him upright- most of the time.

But this time, it was summer, and he had been looking forward to this weekend for weeks. Not because he was all that excited about seeing your classmates who he had needed just as much of a break from as his studies, but more so because it was your birthday. Or, close enough to it.

Your sixteenth birthday, more specifically, and your parents were pulling out all the stops. Thus the balloons and your family's staff running around like their lives depended on it to get everything ready for the early afternoon when all the other guests would be arriving to stay for the night and the following morning.

"Okay, well, yes, I did, but I knew you would like it so it's fine." Your mother insists and you look over at Coryo, rolling your eyes behind her back. She was right, you didn't mind the red and gold, but it was no surprise you didn't have any say in the planning of your own birthday party. It was more for your parents than it was for you, anyway. More for the reputation of your family name, although, you didn't doubt that it would be fun.

"Come on." You whisper to your best friend, gently tugging on his shirt to pull him upstairs.

"Mom, we're going upstairs until the others get here!" You call over your shoulder, already running up the staircase.

"Yes, yes, I'll send someone for you when everything's ready. Just shout if you get hungry." She agrees mindlessly, already putting down bags of last-minute snacks you had picked up on the way.

"Thank you!" Coryo adds in as well as you pull him along.

She laughs softly and shakes her head. "Of course, Coriolanus. You kids have fun. Oh, and go ahead and leave your overnight stuff just in the sitting room upstairs!"

When your other classmates who were able to make the hour-long trip finally all made it out to the beach house, it quickly became bustling with life. The large floor-to-roof windows that spanned both stories of the home were pulled open completely, opening it out to the porch, the pool, and the lakefront. The music was loud, and your parents had set up every screen and projector on the property, inside and out, playing home videos of you when you were growing up. Most featured your performances, and you loved those, but your favourites were of you and your friends.

Coriolanus was a star in your home videos, undeniably. Some of the girls from your class were sitting on the back porch with virgin cocktails your parents' staff had made, pointing out themselves in clips from school events and previous birthday parties and laughing at their younger selves.

Laying on the dock next to Coryo and Clemmie, you were laughing at the boys at the other end of the dock trying to shove each other off when your father's boat pulled back up next to you and he cut the engine.

"You want to go next, bird?" He calls to you as Festus and Pup stumble out of the boat, drenched from head to toe and dripping all over you and your towels.

You look over at Coryo, smiling hopefully at him and he nods, getting up quickly while you make the same effort to get Clemmie to come with you. "Clemmie, come on. The tube fits three people well enough." You tell her as you get up, pulling at your bathing suit to make sure it is still fitting right.

"No, no. I'm good. My parents say that's a death trap, and I believe it." She chuckles, waving her hand dismissively. "I'll be here. You two have fun."

"Suit yourself." You shrug, taking your father's hand as he helps you onto the boat, and Sejanus Plinth, who was already onboard and apparently decided to just stay, hands you a life jacket which you quietly thank him for.

"Clemensia, it's perfectly safe. I'll even go slow for you." Your father offers her as you zip yours up, watching Coryo do the same. Weirdly enough, you can't help but notice it looks good on him. Just about anything does, though.

"No thank you, I'm just fine right here. I'm not the best swimmer as it is." Your friend replies gratefully. "I prefer land."

"Alright, then, but we'll be doing trips all afternoon if you change your mind." He tells her, going back to the helm of the small speed boat reserved specifically for your tubing and wakeboarding and starting the engine up again.

The boat starts moving and you go over to the ship's radio, clicking it on again and turning it up to hear the music better over the sounds of rushing water as he takes you out deeper on the lake.

Once you're satisfied with the volume and the song, you climb up to the front of the boat to sit next to the two boys who are waiting. You weren't sure what they were talking about, making small talk most likely, knowing the both of them, but regardless it stopped when you sat down.

You enjoy the music and the spray of fresh water on your skin for a couple of minutes until you're far enough from the shores to stop.

You and Coryo both get up with a fair bit of excitement, having always loved going tubing with your father behind the wheel of the boat every summer.

"Sejanus, are you coming?" You ask hopefully as you and your friend throw the large inflatable off the back of the boat and into the water, pulling the rope back so it's close enough to climb on.

He looks to your father, who nods encouragingly at him. He'd been on the boat for almost all of the afternoon but hadn't once actually got on the tube. It wasn't much of a secret that he wasn't very well-liked by other kids, but his parents had insisted that he attend your birthday, so he just decided to stay close to one of your parents.

"Um, okay. Sure." He replies quietly with a nervous nod.

Out of all of your classmates, he was the most comfortable with the two of you- being among some of the only kids who hadn't been mean to him in the past.

"Hold on tight." Your father tells him as you and Coryo get situated, laying on your stomachs next to each other and holding onto the handles by your heads and leaving enough room for Sejanus on your other side. "These two are professionals, I don't hold back like with the other kids." He says teasingly, giving you a knowing look.

He climbs on next to you while you hold onto the back of the boat for him, trying to keep it as steady as possible.

"Don't worry, it's gonna be fun." You say to him when you hear the motor start up again and you give your dad a thumbs up to start going.

"It does look like fun." Sejanus agrees quietly, and you can hardly hear him over the waves as the boat moves slowly away from you and the rope starts to unravel.

You turn to look at Coryo again, giving him a smile. "Here, let's switch handles." You suggest, letting go of one of yours and nudging his hand away from his to trade so your arms would overlap on the somewhat rough material that was known to give you both rug burns in the past. "That way we can keep each other on."

He nods, chuckling to himself as he complies, looping his hand under your handle and gripping on tight. "Yeah, we can definitely try."

You knew it wouldn't make much of a difference, but you liked the way his arm felt over yours; warm from the heat of the sun but somehow chilling you down to your bones.

The tube jerks to the right to catch up with the rope as your father's boat gets far enough away and begins to pull you, and you can feel Sejanus tense up beside you as you start to pick up speed.

"You gotta relax!" You call out to him over the rushing water, and he just looks at you with wide eyes as you continue straight for the time being. "Lean into it and you'll stay on easier!"

Sejanus didn't really listen. That much is clear when within a matter of minutes, hitting a corner and bouncing over the waves created by the boat, he tumbles right off the side.

You glance back over your shoulder to see that he's okay, but with the speed you're already moving and the turn your father makes to go back for him, that was a clear mistake.

You weren't paying attention when you hit the corner hard, swinging out behind the boat with the now uneven weight distribution, and before you know it the tube is flipping completely and rolling fast over the surface of the water.

Coryo hears you scream as you suddenly disappear from his side, which only makes it flip faster. He somehow holds on, but not without a blinding pain in his hand and up his arm as it gets caught in the handle that wasn't his, and then he's quickly surrounded by the blue of the lake as well.

You're giggling when your father circles back to you after helping Sejanus out of the water, and you can still see Coryo a ways away. You never realized how fast you were going until you both got thrown off, and you were usually very far away in the water.

Climbing up onto the boat and dripping wet, you pull the tube back up to the boat and hold on to the rope while your father steers you over to your friend, his blonde curls soaked and clinging to his forehead, almost completely covering his eyes.

"Coryo!" You call out as you get closer, laughing through your words. You get closer to the back ladder, prepared to help pull him out. He doesn't respond, though he's looking at you, and you realize quickly that he's ghostly pale- more so than usual, and he's clutching his hand to his chest. "Hey, you okay?" You ask, your smile fading quickly as you lean over the edge to reach for him.

He nods stiffly, and when he reaches out to take your hand, you notice that he's trembling.

"Are you hurt? What's wrong?" You ask, and you quickly hear your father's steps behind you.

"I- um..." You can tell as you try and help him up that he's embarrassed to admit that something's wrong- though he doesn't need to be.

"Dad?" You begin to ask for help, worry seeping into your tone, but he's already there. He gently nudges you out of the way and reaches into the water to pull Coryo out, which, is decently easy for him to do. He was always a skinny kid, and right now you were grateful for that.

"You okay, son? Let me see that." Your father says once Coryo gets his footing, still holding his hand close to his chest.

"You hurt your hand?" You ask when he doesn't move, just staring between you and your father with shock plastered all over his face.

He nods slightly, teeth chattering, and you hear that Sejanus must have turned down the music.

Your father gestures for him to show him his injured hand again, holding his own to take at it and look. "I'm not going to hurt you, I'm just going to take a look."

Coryo looks at you for a split second before looking away again, carefully holding his hand out for your father to look at.

Your father decided after that that maybe that wasn't the best activity to take other people's kids on while they were under his supervision. Secretly, it's a relief that Coryo was the one who got injured from it- he was closer with your family than anyone else, and there likely wouldn't be someone showing up at your door within the week to press charges over a broken thumb. You were still worried, though.

You made quick work upon returning to dry land of hurrying upstairs to your room with him, arm wrapped around his waist as your father tied up the boat. It was only his hand that was injured, but you had never in your life seen someone so pale- Coryo looked like he could collapse at any minute. 

"Someone's grabbing ice for it, just sit down on the bed and I'll get you some water." You say as you guide him to sit on your bed that sat against the corner of the large room, only mildly aware of the shake in your voice and the panic you were quickly descending into.

"I-I'm okay, it's really not that big of a deal..." Coryo mutters and you shake your head, about to leave when your mother walks in in a hurry.

"I brought some ice, darling." She says as she brushes past you to sit next to him and you stand clear out of the way. You needed to give her the space to be a mother and help- you knew that much.

You look around for Coryo's overnight bag while she helps hold the ice pack wrapped in a dish towel to his hand, but you can't find it anywhere. "Mom, we left Coryo's stuff in here this morning, did any of the staff touch it?" You ask, hoping to find him a shirt to cover his shivering skin. The shock, the air conditioning of the house while still dripping wet, and the ice pack were not a friendly combination.

"Oh, I had it moved to the sitting room." She points to the door and your brow furrows slightly.

All your friends who were spending the night were sleeping in the sitting room, and there were beds and a projector screen set up in there with snacks for movies and everything, but you and Coryo were supposed to stay in here when it was time to actually go to sleep. "What? Why? We're sleeping in here."

Your mother shrugs. "I don't know, honey, I just feel that it's time that you both have some of your own space."

What she means is 'I don't think it's appropriate for the two of you to share a bed anymore.'

You and Coryo look at each other, only briefly, and it's only safe to assume that you're both feeling the same thing.

You had never been in less of a rush to grow up, and to be forced to grow apart.

no taglist this time around!! my fics usually get over a hundred requests to be added to the taglist so instead i made a library! follow me over on @runningfrom2am-library and turn on notifs to get updates when i post new parts!!

[gacha99]

Vertin is a very emotionless character

but that doesn't mean she's entirely void of empathy or care. She's just kind of a monotone person, and we can see from Chapter 3 that she's always been this way even when she was a child. In all the scenes she's in she's got a pretty flat and even tone, and doesn't sound as if she has any real dislike of other people.

Particularly it's when she's with Sonetto who's so different from her in every aspect, that we see that Vertin despite her need for freedom and to explore the outside world doesn't hold others in contempt for having different aspirations than her.

Vertin's not unaware of how hard it would be for someone to shake off the hold The Foundation has on them if they've lived their entire lives being told what to do and what to think by The Foundation. And while Vertin was also just like every other child who was brought in at a young age, despite this she still holds an insatiable curiosity for the outside world.

So instead of trying to change other people's minds by forcing them to go along with her plans, or turning her back on them, she shows them the parts of the world that drives her to keep going. She shares the parts of the world that pushes her to keep going with other people in the hope that it just inspires them to join her, and nothing more.

And even though Vertin and Sonetto have very different opinions and views about The Foundation, we can see even in the earlier chapters when they're partners that Vertin hasn't stopped trying to bring others over to her side by simply showing them the outside world.

Vertin's care for other people is so strong that you can even see it in other parts of the game, such as the actual game mechanics for the game. I already mentioned on my other blog about how the Resonate game mechanic is a reflection of how Vertin impacts the characters in the suitcase, and I think it's pretty cool how they've managed to put so much of Vertin in the game even if she's not technically a playable character.

Whenever you "bond" with a character, the things they say are directly towards Vertin and not really "you" the player. There's a clear wall between the players and Vertin in terms of even the character interactions, and that's simply because the devs REALLY want you to know that this game is about Vertin trying to inspire people to come to her side on their own.

Reverse: 1999's core theme seems to simply be "Keep living for the future" and that's a nice message until you realize just about every character has a reason for why they'd want things to go "back to the way they were before". In the beginning, the games objective seemed pretty simple: Defeat these bad monsters causing the Storm, save Arcanists in each era, repeat. But by Chapter 2 it's pretty clear that Vertin didn't "win" in the end.

She managed to save some Arcanists, but she still lost people in the process and had no way of really saving those people's loved ones from the Storm. It's a bittersweet ending where Vertin has to ask these random strangers who have probably never interacted before they met her that day to say goodbye to everything they've ever loved.

So then ultimately what can Vertin do besides shelter a few people from The Storm? To her it is worth it to save even a few people if she can, because while she can't save their loved ones from a fate of being erased from existence, she can give them a chance to keep going forward "To the next era".

[skazoo]

slow and blue and endless.

↳ kim taehyung x f!reader

someone stared at you through the window. you had always felt safe in your own home, shutting out the scary, real world. but a window is just glass, and glass… oh it breaks so, so easily.

length. 1.7k

genre. angst, yandere

warnings/tags. language, obsessive behavior, implied stalking, yandere themes, mind break, emotional manipulation, love bombing(?), mention of mental illnesses, physical violence, kinda gruesome allusion to murder, dark themes overall, minors advised to dni.

networks. none for this.

notes. [THIS IS A REPOST BC TUMBLR TAGS WON'T WORK AND I ALMOST CRIED<;3]

GAH these photos are so 80s serial killer making a creepy videotape that's gonna get edited in a true crime documentary coded...... i know you're seeing my vision, i KNOW it.... anywayyyyyy this is kinda not proofread, and i wrote it while i was supposed to be studying for my exams a while back!! because when am i inspired if not when i shouldn't be?? i hope you like it and i swear something is almost ready for me to publish please wait a little longer (for my engenes and atiny besties)

⚠️ it goes without saying that i in no way condone any obsessive/stalking/creepy/violent behavior and despite this being "x reader" i'm not in any way romanticizing anything i'm writing. also this, as you all know, is fiction and names are merely a narrating mean. ⚠️

i'm desperate for feedback and i love comments with your opinion!

(cross-posted on ao3 only)

navigation

in a way you’ve always loved him. he knows. you don’t even have to say it out loud for him to be happy. 

but sometimes it feels like you take him for granted. sometimes you make him really, really angry and that, he can’t let pass. and it's not for his sake but for yours. always everything for you. he has to make you understand that there are things you can’t do if you want to stay safe from the outside world. safe from him, sometimes.

running away is one of those ugly, wretched things you know well he hates, and he slams you against the wall and drags you back through the front door into the house by your hair, he bashes your head on the kitchen counter, near the fire of the stove he’s been preparing lunch with to make you understand a concept you're apparently too dumb to grasp.

“what the fuck did i tell you about running, uh?” seething with undiluted rage .

“i just wanted to go outside, tae. i swear!”

“i said what the fuck did i tell you about running!? do you understand how much it would hurt me to see you go?!” his voice booms inside the walls of your head, an endless echo that makes bitter tears gather at the back of your eyes and spill over.

your face is burning. tongues of fire lick at your cheeks, a scorching caress that reminds you of taehyung's. his palm always leaves a brand behind, reminding him and yourself that he’s there. 

your hands scramble for his in a miserable attempt to lessen his hold. “i’m sorry, tae! so sorry, please! please!”

his closed fist in your hair pushes your head closer to the heat. “i’ll fucking kill you if i have to, you know that right–” it’s not a question, merely a promise, but you nod anyway, frantically, desperately– “they’ll never stop finding your body, baby. do you understand?” he screams and shakes you with his hands tight in your hair when you only cry in response.

“i said,” leaning in, mouth brushing over your ear. chills go down your back as his voice turns sickeningly mellow as if he’s whispering sweet nothings instead of threats, “do you understand?”

“yes! yes! god, yes i understand! tae, i’m so sorry! it’s all my fault! it’s all my fault!”

your mindless babbles seem to humor him and he moves your head at a safer distance. “and why is that?”

“ ‘twas my fault! i put myself in danger if i run. tae, please! i’m so sorry!” 

and you cry and cry and cry until you have nothing to give. until there’s only emptiness in your head that’s resting on his shoulder. until his shushes really feel reassuring. until he sits you down at the table to eat the lunch he prepared, the one that was so close to killing you. you nibble on it, too weak to really even taste the flavors.

he breaks the empty silence between you with a question. you startle at the sound of his voice and force your heavy eyes to focus on him.

“aren't you curious? about why i chose you?”

“no.”

he scrunches his eyebrows and regards you with a slightly displeased look that has you shrinking back on your chair. 

“but i want to tell you…” he whines.

you don’t say anything about his antics. despite him behaving like a child you’re terrified of what his reaction would be if you actually treated him like one, so you press your lips together and wait. 

“i like people that like me.” and it’s so simple how he says it. obvious, even.

“but why do you think i like you?” quietly, meekly.

he seems to like the question, his boxy smile one full of teeth that in other circumstances you would have found endearing. now it only makes him look like a predator, an animal, drool dribbling down his fangs, jaw ready to snap close around your neck if —and ultimately, when— you say or do the wrong thing. 

“oh, i was so happy, Y/N,” he coos, your name curling in his mouth with ease, as if you’re always been around each other, as if it belongs there, “that when i chose you, you came with me.”

your mouth gapes open at the absurdity of it all. you wonder if he really thinks that you wanted all of this, that you wanted to be taken from your home. you’d ask your old psychology professor if you’d be correct to label him as a narcissist of sorts. a man with too much power, and free time, and loneliness to exhaust all on himself that he had to go around looking for a scapegoat for his secret misery.  

“i didn’t– i didn’t come to you, taehyung. i didn’t have a choice.”

“so you were almost forced to come?”

“no,” it comes out more as a question than an answer and you lower your head in search of a way to rationalize the conversation at hand, “i was completely forced–”

“that’s what you tell yourself,” he retorts before you can even finish your sentence.

“it’s what i know is true,” you spit somewhat offended by his insinuation.  

his smile is a sick thing when you raise your head from the food on your plate —cold and uninviting. the smell alone makes you want to throw up. 

“are you sure?”

your anger leaves space for an unnerving sense of confusion. “what does that– what?”

your frown deepens as you watch him play around with his lunch. you follow his hands pushing back his glasses on his nose. the sick look of complacency that dances on his face seems to speak words that make the hairs at the back of your neck raise in dreadful anticipation. i know something about you that you don’t, his eyes say, and that alone is enough to make you want to scream.

he knows nothing!, you’d be shouting to the usually calm neighborhood, i haven’t told him anything about myself. he can’t know anything! he knows nothing! he knows nothing! you’d holler to the kids walking home from school hand in hand with their mothers who’d be looking at you with contempt, unaware of who lives among them. a wolf in sheep's clothing that could easily make you look like a psychopath. 

you’d do it, you swear to yourself that you’d do it all if it weren’t for the fact that you’ve got the inkling fear that you’ve truly gone mad. the doubt that crawls on your back and makes its way in your ears, slithering then, with much glee into your delusional brain.

how long have you been in this house? his house or the one you bought together once you finished college? did you meet him on a slow rainy day outside a coffee shop or did you catch him staring at you from the window before he broke in and took you from your bed, leaving behind torn sheets and a broken frame with a picture of your friends? does your mind deceive you? are you sane? is he?

it feels like you've had this exact same conversation with him an infinite number of times, always stuck in a loop of unease and sadness that you really can’t explain. loving looks sent your way melt into scary grimaces sometimes and all you can feel is guilt because that’s tae. your tae. the man you chose, the man that chose you.

you realize your vacant eyes are crying when you feel a thumb swipe your cheek with a gentleness that makes your stomach churn in disgust and again a voice tells you that there’s something wrong with you.

“baby, are you alright?”

the way you look at him does nothing to the sick warmth brewing in his stomach. your shiny little doe eyes peeking up at him from under wet lashes, asking for forgiveness that taehyung would never deny you. nose red from the frustration of being lost in your own mind and mouth parted as if to ask him to show you the way, the truth that you seem to have lost.

he stands up and rounds the table to you for you to bury your head in his chest. sobs shake your tired form.

“shh, it’s okay, baby. i swear everything it’s okay. it happens to forget.”

“i’m sorry, tae,” you plead through broken breaths. “i’m so sorry, please.”

he shushes you. lips plant themselves in the crown of your head, a hand rubs at your back soothingly.  

later, in the late evening, you lie in your bed. a bed. the sheets smell of him and the air you breathe does not feel like the one you're used to, but you’re calm. you think you are. maybe.

soft snores sound from behind you and you attempt to turn your head to make sure it’s him. 

“tae?” you let out a whisper. not one that expects itself to be heard.

“yeah?” voice hoarse from sleep.

“nothing.”

he buries his nose in the hair at the nape of your neck, inhaling the shampoo he bought for you. “what?”

“just wanted to make sure you were still here.”

“i’m always here, baby.”

you hum.

minutes pass slowly, like molasses, as if the hand of the seconds inside the alarm on your nightstand is fighting an invisible force, a wall of rubber that threatens to bounce time back. you think he’s fallen back asleep. breath slowing, chest heaving, lulling you to slumber.

you close your eyes. “tae?”

he doesn’t answer. a car alarm sounds from outside the closed curtains, its prolonged blaring bringing a certain agitation in your otherwise silent night. a breath of summer wind leaves bumps on your skin in its wake. you sigh and his arms tighten around your torso. an unconscious gesture, soft, loving.

“i dream of you–” you let your words sink into the air, into the boiling water you carry around in your lungs that doesn’t let you breathe properly, and you shiver again but not from the chill bite of the wind “–and it’s slow, and blue, and endless.”

behind you, taehyung’s mouth stretches into a smile.

in a way, you’ve always loved him. he’s certain of it now as he was before. and even if you didn’t, he will always make sure to make it a reality, one way or the other. wether you want it or not.

taglist: @taevestr @fa1ryjoons @vcutvante

[wastingoxygensince1983]

The Loyal Pin Ep. 05 Thoughts.

I am trying to understand the level of high standards people have for any sapphic show and is just so exhausting.

Like I have never mentioned this before until now and I will never mentioned again but I watched the first episode of blank the series, said is not for me and never made a post or comment about it because is "not for me". Someone else could love it and my opinions could affect that person perception of it.

If you don't like what you are watching, there's hundred of other stuff to watch(between new GL and BLs).

Anyway, let's talk about the episode:

Of course Pin runs away; all of this is new for her and find out that she kissed and actually want to kiss Anin. Very accurate reaction.

That lead to a lot of things in their dynamics that probably are gonna be presented in the future angst. Pin refusing to approach Anin at any level and Anin refusing to eat to the point to get sick.

Anin's brothers seems to be so nice and love her so much. I wonder what is gonna happen with them when all hell get loose and everyone finds out about them.

Anin you little bitch. How fast you took away that. Pin never had a chance. Pin really tried to hold it together. Great scenes together in there.

I am so curious about the family tree. I still don't understand why the lotus palace is like the kitchen of the royalty and Pin and her adoptive mom act like they are high level servants if they are basically family too. Give us interesting dynamics tho.

Finally Anin expressed how much she loves Pin. I really love they bring the love conversation. And Pin also don't understanding her own feelings until she remembers her feelings when she is jealous.

God someone mentioned that they are relaying so much in Freen and Becky's chemistry, but with scenes like the love confession and the kiss; do you really need more? That was perfect.

Actually, for me so far, the plot is there's two people that love each other more than anything they have ever felt before and they are exploring those feelings in a society that don't accept them and with a relationship dynamics where one is a freaking princess.

If the thing I have to pay to have the Thailand government involve in this show is basically food porn of traditional Thai dishes and not some blatant propaganda, be my guess I am happy and that food looks amazing. Sadly as Colombian myself I would never be able to eat anything like that because I would die for spicy food. (not all Latin American people can handle spicy food, not all of us are Mexican).

I am very curious if they are doing the food thing with food of that era or they are doing just popular Thai dishes. Also, I am very curious if they are doing some changes in dialect and language for that period and the fact that the majority of the cast is supposed to be royalty.

Also, I don't remember at all(I have to watch the first episodes again) but have they mentioned the surnames or anything they are using for this monarchy? Because I want to know if they are creating a fake royal family or these was supposed to be the family that was in the palace in that time. Also, if they are connected to the family of Gidle's Minnie(everyone mentioned she is supposed to have royal blood; something about the Lanna kingdom?) Usually the culture differences don't affected me this much but because is a period drama I want to know more about that culture.

I AM STILL VERY AFRAID OF THE GHOST OF HENG IN THAT FUCKING TRAILER AND I HATE THAT HE HASN'T SHOW UP. Every episode he is in the back of mind, probably getting ready to come to be an obstacle of my girls and probably try to get married to one of them(probably Anin because in Gap he was after Sam).

[umi-adxhira]

𝐈𝐊𝐄𝐌𝐄𝐌 𝐕𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐀𝐈𝐍𝐒 | 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐈𝐑 𝐓𝐘𝐏𝐄 +

𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐋 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍𝐒

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒: ᴡɪʟʟɪᴀᴍ ʀᴇx, ʜᴀʀʀɪꜱᴏɴ ɢʀᴀʏ, ʟɪᴀᴍ ᴇᴠᴀɴꜱ, ᴇʟʙᴇʀᴛ ɢʀᴇᴇᴛɪᴀ, ᴀʟꜰᴏɴꜱᴇ ꜱʏʟᴠᴀᴛɪᴄᴀ, ʀᴏɢᴇʀ ʙᴀʀᴇʟ, ᴊᴜᴅᴇ ᴊᴀᴢᴢᴀ, ᴇʟʟɪꜱ ᴛᴡɪʟɪɢʜᴛ, ᴠɪᴄᴛᴏʀ

𝐀𝐔𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐑'𝐒 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄: Just know that these headcanons are made before the official release of the game in English, so expect inaccuracies in their personalities (occ). This also sorta came out as relationship headcanons, but eh, I'm hitting two birds with one stone

𝐃𝐀𝐓𝐀 𝐁𝐀𝐍𝐊

#𝐖𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐈𝐀𝐌 𝐑𝐄𝐗

He strikes me as someone who wants a partner who can challenge him, both intellectually and physically

People with a different set of opinions to his are often people who piques his interest. As long as you have a reason for thinking the way you do, this man will not rest until he picks every little thing inside your brain and understands it

He also seems like the type to like girls who fancy a bad boy. He is often mentioned as someone who "lives by his own rules" and is the "pure meaning of abominable evil", so if you're into that then he sees no reason why you can't be together

Also likes someone who is composed, someone only he can break. You could be doing the most mundane of tasks and he will appear behind you, whispering the filthiest words in your ear until you're as red as a tomato, your mind plagued with the words for the rest of the day

Likes to return to his bed snuggled up against you, literally can not sleep without holding you close to his chest

#𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐎𝐍 𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐘

Into someone who's jealous. He wants his partner to know that you can't live without him. Hell, he'll purposely make you jealous just so you can beg for his attention. And who is he to tell his little bunny no?

He's into short people, sorry to the tall people. I dunno, he seems like a guy who wants his partner to snuggle against his chest when they're in the crowded streets, or if you're shy... maybe he's more into shy people than short people?

He likes clingy people. Again, he wants his partner to depend on him. He loves it when you sneak up behind his back and hug him from behind. Sure, he can sense you coming from a mile away, but he's happy you took the time to "surprise" him like this

Into smart people. Well, not smart smart, just not dumb. He needs someone who is average in IQ. The only time he loves you being dumb is when you're dumb on his big co— anywho

He likes how you're the only one who can see through his lies. Everyone finds it impossible to notice, but you're better than that

#𝐋𝐈𝐀𝐌 𝐄𝐕𝐀𝐍𝐒

He loves someone who appreciates his work outside of the Crown. He is mentioned to work as a stage actor, so he loves it when he sees you invested in what he's working on

Someone who compliments him already is his friend. He loves compliments, especially when it comes from your pretty mouth

If you give him head pats he will literally melt, fight me. He closes his eyes and leans in closer to your touch, like a cat

He gets grumpy when you don't give him attention. Again, like a cat. He will whine and pout until you look in his direction, and then drags you away to help him work on his new play. He gets happy when you comply with no complaints

If you bake for him he will brag about it in front of people. Not even joking, he's all like, "Look Victor! My lovely darling made me cookies! Aren't they thoughtful?"

Also into someone who has many interests and hobbies so he can also be invested. May it be from playing chess to gambling, he's gonna support you no matter what

#𝐄𝐋𝐁𝐄𝐑𝐓 𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐓𝐈𝐀

It's stated by many people, including translators that he has a weird obsession to pretty things, but leaves them messily in his room. So if you managed to be the romantic interest of Elbert, your insecurities are literally thrown out of the window and into another dimension

Likes a calm people, he's not into the loud and noisy people. It hurts his ears. He likes someone with an angelic voice, someone who can whisper a lullaby in his ear to help him fall alseep

He also appreciates someone who helps him with his spending problem. With all of the pretty objects he collects, he's probably in crippling debt, so he likes it when you try and coax him out of his spending problem

Unfortunately, he found a loophole. Yes, hd cannot spoil himself with a bunch of useless pretty trinkets to be stuffed in his room like trash, but he could spend it on you

Speaking of his trash room, he wpuld honestly appreciate it if you helped him clean everything up to make his life easier

#𝐀𝐋𝐅𝐎𝐍𝐒𝐄 𝐒𝐘𝐋𝐕𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐀

This man. Holy, this man

Needs someone to keep him in check. Like a owner with their dog. Your job is less his lover in public, but more of not letting his impulse thoughts win

Like Elbert, he looks like he would be a massive spender, but he has it in more control than Elbert, so yeeeeaaaahhhh... good luck

Loves physical contact. He has something touching you 24/7. Be it his hand on your waist, your legs intertwined when you sleep, or simply him holding onto your sleeve like a child when you move through the bustling streets of London

Loves giving you hickies, especially your neck, where everyone can see how good he's making you feel. Also, he likes to mark more intimate areas, such as your chest and thighs

He also likes someone who's just as sly as him. He calls them your "adventures," and he can't wait for the next one

#𝐑𝐎𝐆𝐄𝐑 𝐁𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐋

He seems like a person who's into that doctor/patient trope. He just wants to take care of you

He will melt if you see him mildly injured, like a paper cut or something, and you basically nurse him back to health. You make such a big deal out of the smallest things and it makes him love you more

Likes it when you feed him. Seems like the type to love strawberries, like Vlad. He thinks you feeding him is an intimate moment only for you and him and no one can take that

He finds it funny when you take his glasses, spare clothes, and pretend to be him. Jude could literally walk through the door and be treated by you rather than Roger based on limited experience, and lots of watching you probably made him worse, but go off, I guess

Lets you play with his hair. His hair isn't long and luscious like Victor, and there isn't a whole lot you can do with it, but you love it regardless

#𝐉𝐔𝐃𝐄 𝐉𝐀𝐙𝐙𝐀

Hey bbg

He thought that he would like stupid people. He likes how his intelligence alone overpowers and intimidates them and how he will always be above them. But you're different

He always has a stoic/rude demeanour around others, even you. But once you're being closed doors, especially in the light, he becomes clingy. He won't outwardly say he wants attention. He just glares at you before you give in or lay you down on top of him, his head mushed in the crook of your neck and breathing heavily

Apparently, he smokes. Based on the translations, Jude and Roger were former doctor and patient, but I see him as someone who still has the problems he has but just covers it up so no one can see (this may not be true). You automatically assume it's because of his smoking and force him to stop, and while he gets pissy, inside he likes how you care for him

Likes to have baths with you. With your back against his chest and his head in the crook of your neck... I dunno, I guess he likes having his head in your neck

#𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐈𝐒 𝐓𝐖𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓

He's obsessed with the idea of happiness, so he seems like a dude who would go for a cheery and bubbly character

Would defo make flower crowns for you, I don't make the rules here. Also likes teaching you how to make flower crowns. He likes how you actually make an effort, and it comes out so bad. Will still wear it with pride, though

He's really tall, so if you're small, he would be the type to carry you on his back. He just wants you to know what it's like to be tall for once

Make him sweets, and he will never let you go. He needs your food to function properly. He may even become a little grumpy and forget to ask his daily question of "are you happy?" to everyone he meets, especially Jude

Wear his clothes and you're never wearing your own clothes again in public. After a long day of working in the trading company, all he wants to do is to settle down onto his bed and cuddle you wearing his shirt

#𝐕𝐈𝐂𝐓𝐎𝐑

That man is a hazard to society

He likes someone who is willing enough to cause a bit of mischief with him, having fun like no one else could. You're like partners in crime

Of course, his number one priority is the Queen, second is you. You can't really complain when the Queen is above you, but later on, you will be of more importance to him soon enough

Likes it when you braid his hair. He's always open to trying new hairstyles and enjoys looking himself in the mirror, looking absolutely stunning. It just comes naturally, I guess

He also likes it when he paints your nails. You can not tell me he doesn't spend time doing his nails, so doing it for you just seems right to him

He likes those people who don't look what they seem. For example, an innocent, cute-looking thing starts cursing at someone or an intimidating darling randomly starts hugging him from nowhere demanding cuddles, and everyone's just like "???"

©️umi-adxhira [19/06/2023]

[yakultii]

What's the favourite photo you've taken? - they're all so nice!! 💕

awww thank you sm !! <33 tbh I don’t really find any one photo too significant as of yet, not to say they aren’t nice to have but real life moments are nicer :)

these aren’t necessarily my fav photos but could argue might be my favourite “vibes”

this one was taken with a digital point and shoot — while it may be argued objectively shitty and I’m completely aware a toddler could replicate it, I think this is why I love it. the fact that it just is what it is. the untouched scene naturally tells its own story, rather than needing to curate one yourself. I personally find it’s more than just something to look at. this stripped back style evokes more emotion for me than others and I love how the darker lighting does not dull its life. I mean this is all subjective. I personally don’t think this style is the best for every photo (or maybe it could be) but I really like when it works out. as someone who feels disconnected from my own existence a lot of the time, I like that I can live through it a little, as I believe it to be as close to a reflection of my interpretation of the society we live in as possible. while it wouldn’t really matter if this particular photo got deleted. never to be seen again, I’d never know the feeling of this particular moment, until I felt it in real life again. obviously I didn’t quite know all this when randomly taking it while bored on the train but I think that’s the only reason it turned out this way which is even more warming.

but of course, maybe more so than anything, I love my trusty film <3 point and shoot ofc — these photos alongside the header of this blog, again very little effort but somewhat significant of a story. I guess what I’m trying to say is that I like when I’m able to capture a simple image that tells a story/evokes emotion (again, whether or not it portrays a story may be subjective). Especially with minimal effort, cause in my opinion if it’s perfect as is, then surely it’s worth taking a photo of. Film is more reliable to me at this point of my life, while I’m not very experienced (in any kind of photography really) I think it’s hard to fail, in fact I feel as though it almost exceeds my expectations. As someone who has never been any good at technical aspects of any form of art (or the patience to pursue them), I find film enables me to curate something to a standard of which I couldn’t ask for anything better of myself. Not to mention the process of developing etc. meaning I really have to stop and envision my image more so than with digital, which is basically an act of mindfulness (something I’m also usually very bad at). I’m pretty sure the Coca Cola photo was the first photo I ever took on film in 2020 lockdown (besides a barbie disposal I got for xmas as a kid that my parents were mad at me for quickly “wasting” and never to be developed). what I love about all these photos is that I believe I was able to zoom in on (no pun intended, because actually I didn’t) seemingly insignificant moments in life happening all around me so that they could later be recognised as something more. again, in my mind, my life feels very fragile at the best of times so I like that I can hold onto things a little longer when I’m alone. I’m so so glad film has stuck around and I hope I one day fix my favourite film camera and can take more photos like these!

again, hella subjective and have found most people I know to have very different preferences in what photos they think look and feel best, but as of right now these are mine :)

[igglemouse]

Sunday brings another sunny day to Oasis Springs and my morning, as usual, starts with breakfast. This time chicken and waffles. Taking a syrupy bite of them reveals why these things have been sooo popular for my stand. I'm not sure if it's my own skill that's the result of the sweet and savory flavor combustion on my tongue or the waffle cooking thing I use but either way this dish is definitely a simoleons maker.

I do believe you always enjoy your own cooking or at least there is a good chance for it so I'm sure there is some bias in what I am about to say but I should probably consider raising the price of my dishes.

So part of my big plan is to really lean more into variety. The staples of my stand will of course be waffles and pizza, just because they are easy to make on the spot and who doesn't love waffles or pizza? Could I combine the two and...ah, any way, while I could put out more chicken quesadillas I do have to realize that stocking my stand with that every day is going to make it feel less and less special, so today will be something new! Pan Con Tomate! It being unfamiliar around these parts will help its appeal as the curiosity will draw sims nearer which is the first step to making simoleons.

Food, at its best, is an experience. The first thing one experiences is how it looks so if it looks like garbage then one will hold their nose instinctively and not even want to smell it. If it looks tempting then people will linger a little closer to engage their sense of smell. These two, in my very humble opinion, is what gets someone to take a bite.

Of course the most important sense is taste but you won't get that far if you present garbage.

So, part of my presentation today will be something new and fresh. Along with pizza of course, since you really can never go wrong with pizza!

Pizza takes a bit of time to make and just enough time to work on my hip movement. You might not know this about me but I'm a very good dancer! I think I could have even become a professional at it if I wanted as it is just something that comes to me naturally, especially with the right kind of music. If the tunes can't get my hips swaying then I have no time for it!

My plan, which I'll reveal in a moment, has me brimming with confidence, so much so that I spend a little extra on self care. Slicing up lemons and limes and soaking in my cheap but tolerable tub to just enjoy the moment.

My budget is tight, probably far too restrictive to spend too much on bath bombs and other aromatherapy but like I've mentioned, I'm feeling really good about my stand today and I'm betting that I make my simoleons back...

That's right, it was time to take my stand on the road, specifically, to the heart of the town, Oasis Springs park! Today, the heat is not too overpowering and so there are plenty of people just wandering around looking for something to do and hopefully something to eat. So the park becomes a perfect backdrop for my stand and really, so far at least, a launching pad for my reputation here in Oasis Springs.

I'm not here to just make a few simoleons, I'm also here to make my name. I'll be more than the 'Food Stand' girl.

One great thing about being a chef is that you will never lack for food.

I plan on being here all day, I won't leave until the sun does, and that means for a moment I must retreat from work and take a break. I grab a plate of chicken and waffles and dig in, letting bigger plans and grand ideas settle in my mind.

Honestly, when I moved here, the idea of a humble life appealed to me. I wanted to make just enough to have a roof over my head and food in my belly, everything after that would be a bonus...but now that I've had a taste of success, I want more.

Why settle when more is on the table?

The sun does make its leave and I take the more that is offered to me as I work a little into night and only close up when its clear that I've squeezed the park for every simoleon I could.

The result? Well over 800 simoleons, a massive day, far exceeding the measly 100 simoleon goal I've set for myself.

The park may be empty now but my pockets are full!

I make it home with the success of my day fresh on my mind but not forgetting that I chose work over another day out with Pascal. I recall that after he had a big game he called me and shared the excitement of his victory and so I meant to do the same.

The problem? Well, maybe I've called a little too late but he doesn't sound too enthused at the sound of my voice? I tell him about how well I've sold and while he does congratulate me there is an undertone in his voice that I don't quite like, a hint of indifference that didn't match the sincere joy I shared with him the other day when he discussed his assist goal thingy.

I'm not sure what to think of it, perhaps nothing at all? Sometimes we overthink things, especially with men, you know how they can be? It is also pretty late, nearing ten, and he's an athlete so I'm sure he's tired.

Yes, I think I'm overthinking things, and with an ex-lover slipping back into my life the last thing I should do is complicate things...

Episode List - Episode 3 ‘Work It Out’

[bcbdrums]

Ok give me your feelings on SidStein and Sid/Naigus

First, to others waiting for ask answers - I answer out of order, sorry. I gotta go with what I'm in the mood to reply to and/or have time to reply to. So yeah.

Second, I'm DUMB I did not realize this ask was for the Bingo-card thing until you sent the ask a second time. So I'll answer to that second one with the Bingo card because...... I typed up this LOOOOOOONG reply that you see here, and realized right as I was about to drop it into queue that I'd totally misunderstood the ask. But. I wanted to ramble about this, so, the internet gets my opinions regardless.

I have SO many thoughts about Stein and Sid and things I plan to write (some very soon, which are mentioned herein but not in a fic context). Headcanons incoming!

Okay so I don't ship Stein/Sid but they are definitely very good friends. I think it probably started in the academy when Sid joined their class super-young just like Stein did. Younger than the average student, but not quite as young as Stein was. Very talented. I think he'd have caught Stein's attention for his skill at a young age, and also for his no-nonsense way of looking at things. Stein struggles with morality, and Sid is very black and white about everything. He never has those debates with himself, he's just got the answer ready to go. So I think that would have intrigued Stein.

Another thing is, Sid wouldn't have looked at Stein as a freak nor been afraid of him. In Sid's typical manner of taking things at face value, that's how he'd have taken Stein. Another talented meister who happens to enjoy vivisection as a hobby and thus he'd know to watch his back in that regard, but no differently than he watches his back generally. He truly wouldn't treat Stein differently than anyone else. This too would catch Stein's notice.

They'd become friends in a different way than Stein and Spirit are friends. No living together, only seeing each other in class, on assignments, and socially when Stein gets dragged out by Spirit to do things. And Sid would just...treat him like he treats everyone else. So, this and Sid's unique black and white take on everything would intrigue Stein.

He'd soon learn of and rely on Sid's absolute loyalty and trustworthiness in battle. He would possibly gradually make Sid a confidant and/or distraction as the world slowly begins to fall out from under Stein, as he sees a future coming where he may lose his weapon and then ultimately...it happens.

I think Sid stayed by Stein's side after that... After Spirit was gone, and with him, Stein's thready hold on sanity... (Or was Spirit also a hold on madness, hmm~) I think Sid was a rock for Stein in that time, because that's the kind of man Sid is. He's not the type to leave a friend in need. Even if he doesn't know how to help. And I think they'd remain good friends through the following years and Sid would be one of the reasons Stein didn't just...vanish off into the ether after losing Spirit.

I think Sid was a strong grounding force for Stein through those remaining years of Stein's adolescence and young adulthood even though Sid is younger. His unique grasp of morality would have continued to fascinate and confuse Stein, and be something he could use in his own confused rationalizations as he suddenly finds himself forced to navigate life without his weapon, using other weapons, and...then what, after he graduates? Sid would still be there.

So... I think when Sid died, Stein couldn't take it. He couldn't take the loss of another friend. But this time...he just might be able to do something about it. So he did. (I looked it up but couldn't find it anywhere, but some people imply?? That Lord Death ordered Stein to bring Sid back. If that's canon someone please direct me to the reference; maybe it's in SE NOT? I think Stein did it all on his own....)

So anyway....yeah. And I think after bringing Sid back to life, they remained good friends. Plenty of canon evidence (in both canons) to suggest as much. :)

Moving on now... Sid/Naigus. I've less to say here, I don't think about them too much. First off, yes, I like the ship. I think they were a couple while still in the academy together. I also think Naigus is slightly older than Sid. I think she was always there, an extension of Sid even through his friendship with Stein. Another calm and steady presence that perplexed and also helped steady our madman.

I also think Naigus reels Sid in from extremes. Because he's so black and white about everything, there may be areas that warrant some thought spent in the gray area that he is oblivious to, and she offers him that balance. Her thoughtfulness complements his iron will. Likewise, he brings out the best in her. A little knife who never makes death scythe, but is the choice weapon of someone who ultimately becomes a renowned three-star meister, highly-regarded teacher, and one in Lord Death's inner circle? And he chooses her. His fortitude would help her increase her confidence in herself, to be more sure and forthright with her opinions, even if they clash with his; after all, he's never shy of sharing, so why should she be? I think she has a deep empathy, but she's also as no-nonsense as Sid. She'll take the time to read people and a situation that Sid may not, but she won't pander to anyone.

I'm terrible at jokes and puns, but I keep wanting to say something here about... quick stabs of wisdom? They both cut to the chase? Someone more clever than me can say something about this later.

Are they a couple? Oh yes, yes they are. Sid likes women, and Mira likes Sid. I don't really know what else to say on that except they like everything about each other. Looks, personality, attitude, fighting styles... And they respect each other. They don't balk if the other tells them they need to rein something in; they'll listen. They know the other knows them that well. They're meister and weapon, after all. Who knows another's soul better than their partner?

Now, manga!Sid..... And I know you've not read it, so I won't spoil... But we're gonna ignore certain aspects of manga!Sid's personality because I think anyone reading this who has read the manga can agree with me that those aspects of Sid are just the author projecting his own...tendencies...onto the character. That's as far as I'll go with that. Sometimes things are just blatantly...not truly part of the story. So yeah.

THANK YOU again for this ask, I've actually had Stein and Sid on my mind quite a lot in these last few weeks. A fic is being mentally written, haha, and I looooove it.

[anticidic]

Hello, if you don't mind, can I ask your top 5 favorite characters from BSD? Why you love them? And, what are your top 7 favorite moments from that series?

Also, from which author (BSD characters) have you read the books? Hope my question is not confusing.

Thanks if you want to answer....

ooh, hi!! sure!

this has gotten incredibly long, so I'll be putting a good portion of it under a read more.

Favorite characters

Dazai

Chuuya

Fyodor

Mushitaro

Ango

Dazai: He's the kind of character where just when I think I'm starting to finally crack the code and understand him, turns out nope, I was wrong all along with my interpretations and couldn't be more far off. I more "love-hate" him because I absolutely do not defend his past transgressions, but acknowledge he has come a long way from the dark place he used to find himself in.

What particularly interests me about him is his amorality. He does what he does or did what he did in the past and does not see his choices as good or bad, just a means to an end. And I like how that aspect of him clashes with Ango, where Ango would question why do we have to sacrifice one person to save 100 when we can save everyone? Having to sacrifice someone should not even be an option. Whereas Dazai would see it as sacrificing that one to save 100 and think nothing of it, because obviously saving as many people as possible is the goal, even if someone has to die for it. And also that the way he views the universe and the people: he treats it oddly, like it's all an experiment to study. He likes studying people, seeing what makes them crack, laugh, cry. And wants to understand why because what makes one person cry does not make him cry.

Chuuya: Man just can't catch a break sometimes. But I like that he's incredibly intelligent and empathetic. Obligatory read Stormbringer NOW. When he's put beside the likes of Dazai and Fyodor he ends up getting foreshadowed, but standalone he's shown that he's capable of making his own deductions and figuring people out in similar veins. Not to mention the fact that he's experienced loss time and time again, literally to those closest to him, but he still gets back up and dusts himself off. And the fact it hasn't embittered him to hold grudges against everyone—we still see how trusting he is of Dazai, for instance. And he still treats Shirase like a friend. I think he harbors a lot of guilt, but he doesn't let it break him.

Fyodor: It's still hard to have a 100% confident opinion of him with what's been going on in the manga up until now, but until the plot continues to advance, I'm standing with the side that I don't think he has a god complex, but more of a savior complex. He's so completely assured that he's doing the right thing and is blinded by the fact that he's actually hurting a lot of people in his quest to save people. He's burdened himself with the task of essentially saving the world of ability users and is taking on the consequences of doing so until the end. I think it ties in with his religious motifs.

Mushitaro: I was immediately drawn to him. He presents as a bit, well, grandiose at first. Thinks himself above others, detectives are basically the dirt beneath his feet, but (and this ties into one of my favorite moments) when it came time for Yokomizo to die and we saw just how distraught Mushitaro was over losing Yokomizo and having to be the one who carried that will out, those emotions were raw. The mask he had on just completely cracked and we see a man who is tasked with carrying out the will of his friend in the worst possible way, and does it anyway. He's no longer concerned about outsmarting and besting others. All he can think of is loss. It knocks him down from his metaphorical pedestal he believed himself to be on, just to learn he's like everyone else. He is not invincible.

Ango: I consider him an embodiment of guilt. He doesn't live for himself, he's like a puppet on strings being tugged in all different directions and forced to dance to the tune of the puppet master (in this case, the government). He basically has no free will. That he's self-aware some of the things he's had to do were wrong and would hurt people makes me respect that a lot. He knows he's no better than anyone else, and there isn't much he can do to make peace with that or make it up to others he's hurt in the process. He clearly has beliefs that conflict with the government, such as disagreeing with having to sacrifice any of its citizens for the greater good and the "killing two birds with one stone" choices like introducing Mimic to Japan in order to also try to wipe out the Port Mafia.

As for my favorite moments (I'll keep this shorter):

Perfect Crime Arc: I know this is cheating as a whole arc, but I thought it was very well-done. Ranpo's look of disbelief when he couldn't figure out it was Mushitaro behind the crime. How Mushitaro thought himself invincible. Then how it all came crashing down.

Mori putting Tachihara's hat back on after hunting dog reveal: Tachihara was the shocked one, while Mori had a knowing smile. He knew. And had absolutely nothing to say other than to put Tachihara's hat on his head.

Yosano vs Kajii fight on the train: we get a glimpse into who Kajii is and his beliefs, which I thought was neat. Wish we would've gotten more. Yosano didn't respect Kajii's disregard for life and his careless experimentation.

Nathaniel vs Akutagawa: I loved the easter egg that Akutagawa called himself 'diablo'. It wasn't to be edgy, but it was a reference of how real life Akutagawa thought of himself despite being extremely religious. He thought he would go to hell as he died with the bible in hand. Also, Margaret sacrificing herself.

Atsushi & Akutagawa vs Ivan: I liked the implications of this more so than the fight itself. Atsushi and Akutagawa working together, and they fuse their abilities together. The trust they had in one another to do that.

Buraiha Trio taking a photo together: Pretty self-explanatory. Thought it was pretty impactful of them all taking a photo and how it would be the last time they were together.

Dazai & Ango visiting Oda's grave: Also pretty self-explanatory. It's not animated, but Ango has visited Oda's grave even in the rain. And Dazai continues to visit his grave. It depicts the guilt Ango had, and that Ango and Dazai truly cared about Oda.

Authors whose books I've read:

(the entirety of The Guild's members)

Dazai

Chuuya (his poems)

Fyodor

Agatha Christie

Mori

Kenji

Atsushi

Ranpo

Ayatsuji

Bram Stoker

I have Yosano and Mushitaro planned, just haven't found the time to read their works. As well as Nikolai.

[thetwilightroadtonightfall]

I reread my own fic A Light That Never Goes Out last night and remembered that I actually have notes for it so here y’all go, I’m dumping them here! 🌈

Ch 1

okay so here we go, here’s me explaining the candle thing again

To the newer folks who might not know, when you meet Ephemera in khx (browser chi), he asks you to get a candle from the Moogle because the Moogle wouldn’t let him get one. You’re more successful than he is, and throughout the quests where you’re traveling in the sewers with him, you go ahead and clear out the Heartless while he holds the candle so the flame doesn’t go out. The sewers visibly look darker too, until you both reach the end

You can watch it here

Ch 2

It always bugged me that the union leaders never got to fully grieve Ava or any of the other foretellers on screen. As far as they know, they perished in the war, they’re gone. So I wanted to let Ephemera have a moment to miss her, as one of her friends and someone who liked being around her

I also think that out of anything that happened during the war, it would’ve been really poignant if Player remembered their interaction with Ava. Of course, that’s part of their pain that was meant to be erased via union cross, but I imply that in this fic, Ephemera has gradually been helping them sift through the memories rather than completely suppressing them. Slowly re-exposing them to the memories so they don’t have a total breakdown.

As someone very close to Ephemera, it just feels more right and fair to him that Player gets these important memories back. It’s his sign of trust

Ch 3

It’s the shortest chapter, but still one I really like

It’s important to me that you know just how smitten Ephemera is with Player, and also how great of a friend Skuld is

She plays a wingman role in this fic, basically the one who encourages these two oblivious pining dorks to get together and helps when they need a third opinion

Ch 4

As I said in the notes, this is an expanded/updated version of an ask prompt which you can read here

The most important change to me was Ephemera asking to kiss them first rather than going in all gung ho. It feels more in character for him. Plus we love consent in this household!

Ch 5

I miss khux’s avatar boards…but not buying them!! 😜

The black and white tuxedo Player tries on was foreshadowing for Ephemera struggling to choose between a black and white tuxedo in ch 9

I also just really love Ephemera in red boots. It’s like…a Thing for me now. This will not be the last you hear of it

Now’s a good spot to mention that Ephemera’s absolutely relentless when it comes to being flirty. Not in the “whoa he‘s got rizz” way, but more in the “wow this guy’s a massive cheese ball” way. He’s been like this in my head since 2016 (I blame Kam. Love you Kam!!)

Ch 6

This was written with the intent of Player being somewhere on the ace/aro spectrum (one of the meanings for the chapter being called Purple is a reference to the colour purple on the ace flag). I didn’t really elaborate on it or even mention it because honestly, I’m not aspec and I wasn’t sure if I was portraying it accurately enough for it to be a prominent point

What I wanted the focus to be on was simply that Ephemera would love them, no matter what they feel or don’t feel. This applies to chapter 10 too, where he’s very understanding of whatever their opinion on having kids is

Ch 7

The jokes about the barter system is actually from a bunch of skulmerayer mini prompts I tried to write but ultimately couldn’t figure out or even fit in anywhere else

Eph and Player should’ve been able to hang out in Candy Kingdom together like they did in Cy-Bug Sector…..I stand by this

They both have a severe case of the sillies, amplified when they’re around each other

Ch 8

I think Ephemera gets bad dreams too, especially after the war. He often dreams about how hurt Player got, or worse, not being able to save them at all. And now he has bad dreams of the canon universe, where he lost everything, including Player

But this is a different timeline, where the two of them, and Skuld, were all able to escape the data world and meet up with the other leaders again to plan their next move in a new world

Ch 9

In this alternate timeline, all the union leaders continue their work together in Scala ad Caelum at the main tower. Honestly, I didn’t really think of how this would happen, but just imagine some kind of override where they’re able to create a new world at the expense of losing Daybreak Town forever. That part sadly stays the same

Skuld tells Ephemera, “You’ll be alright on your own.” It’s a callback to what he told her before leaving her party.

I like listening to Chikai (orchestra), starting it right before Ephemera pulls out the wayfinder :)

LISTEN I just think gifting a wayfinder can also be a romantic gesture. The sokai fans get this. It can be a big romantic gesture in place of giving someone a ring. It’s cute and made by your partner’s own hands, doesn’t get in the way of gripping a keyblade properly, and always lets you find each other again no matter where your travels take you across the worlds. Its pretty! It’s unique! It’s cute!!!

Ch 10

This is a 10 year timeskip, they’re all in their mid to late 20s now

Ephemera and Player have settled down in Destiny Islands, but take trips to stay in Scala for a few months at a time to relieve the others of their leader duties (and later to teach at the academy). So essentially they live both in Scala’s tower, and in their own home on the islands throughout the year

I feel like in this universe, Blaine would settle down first. Him having a kid on the way ended up giving Ephemera a bit of baby fever, which can often be what happens amongst friends and family around the same age

I have a headcanon ingrained in my head that Eph was raised by two moms who owned a library, so he’s always been surrounded by books growing up

I intentionally kept it vague whether or not he and Player would conceive or adopt children mainly because of Player’s ambiguity and also cause I could easily see them doing a mix of both

(I also headcanon the two of them being a t4t couple so there’s a lot of ways the having kids conversation can be interpreted anyway :D)

but basically, they both end up being parents in canon, so why not make them be parents together? 😊

In conclusion: I love them your honor. Thank you for reading!!!

[stardust-falling]

Heya! Figured I'd ask on your main since it's not actually svsss canon related, but would you mind sharing more info about Asian hair texture, particularly curly?? I tried looking it up (mainly on YouTube for visual reference and descriptions) but got overwhelmed instantly and don't know where to start. I'm a white Scandinavian and never had many irl friends of other ethnicities, so I'm feeling very clueless.

Alright so, obligatory disclaimer that I'm just talking about my own experiences, and not saying it's universal. There's gonna be a variety, even if there are similarities.

So, a lot of times if you look up on the internet "asian curly hair" or "natural asian curly hair" the pictures... most of them probably won't actually be real, it'll be styled looks. Especially since "natural" could mean "natural-looking."

A bit about asian hair in general, strands are thicker, with a higher number of cuticle cells. Asian hair is usually stronger than other hair types, and has a stiffer feeling to it-- it holds its shape well, and if cut short will usually stick straight out of the scalp without falling down (for example, when my hair is shorter to mid-length, if i press my hand down against my head, my hair will create a sort of cushion. There's a bit of give and it's not flat to my scalp). Asian hair is heavy, too, and has a reddish undertone to it regardless of the color, if it's black or brown-colored (not all Asian hair is black! Most, but not all, and Asian hair has a tendency to brown a bit in the sun, so rarely will someone long-haired have completely jet-black hair all the way down). There's a bit of a quality where the strands of hair will cling to themselves (my guess is because the higher cuticle count), so it can be pretty easy to pin up with just a hair stick, and doesn't fall out that easily. The texture when feeling it can be a little bit coarse, but still soft and silky depending on hair care. Mine has been both at different times. In my opinion, Asian hair can also be quite glossy and lustrous in comparison with other hair types, but part of that might have more to do with just the dark color. Another thing is that Asian hair grows fast. I can cut mine pretty short and then it'll grow to shoulder-length within a few months. This has overall made me pretty liberal with my haircuts-- if I want shorter hair or a different cut, I don't have to think too hard about it, since it'll be long enough to tie back again in a pretty short time.

Obviously this is all generalization, and might not apply to everyone, we're not a monolith.

So now for my own personal experience with curly-type hair:

Disclaimer again, I am mostly Han Chinese ethnically, but I have a little of mixed Central/Northern Asian and eastern European ancestry, several generations back at the most recent. This may contribute to my hair texture, or it may not-- I also know people with curly-textured hair that are 100% East Asian.

So, through most of my life, up until around my late teens to early adulthood, my hair was completely straight and smooth. At the very most, on humid days there would be frizz, and perhaps the ends of my hair would curl inward ever so slightly, but everything from the top of my head to the end of my hair was straight without a single wave. I'm not sure exactly when it changed, just that at some point it did-- probably having something to do with puberty, but who knows?

Now, my overall hair texture ranges from around 1b or 1c to roughly 2b. Not particularly curly in the overall scheme of curls, but definitely curly relative to the usual texture for my ethnic background! But wait, there's more. Remember how I mentioned that Asian hair will keep its shape and cling to itself? Well, my hair does this thing where different sections have more curls than others. So while most of my hair might hover around 1c-2a on the average day, in a few places on my head, some might be almost completely straight, while others might be 2c or even into type 3 hair, where it starts to corkscrew a bit (especially annoying when one section of this happens to be in the fringe and it's turning the wrong direction).

Unless I were to style it, there's not really any uniformity to the curl at all, and I might wake up one day to find the bigger curls in completely different places than the day before. It's hard to find any rhyme or reason to it. Sometimes it can look pretty cute, but other times it's just hard to manage.

Then, there's the frizz. Oh, the frizz is my nemesis. I can always tell when it's about to rain, because my hair suddenly gets much curlier and starts to frizz, and at that point it's basically impossible to smooth out even when I tie it back. Right now I live in a very humid area, so it's worse than back when I lived in the mountains (fun fact, if I'm in the mountains, or somewhere without a lot of humidity, my hair texture goes back to being straight, if not completely so).

One particular characteristic is that my hair is so heavy that when it's longer, the top part is straight while the bottom is curly, about the bottom third of it or so-- it weighs itself down and pulls the strands taut on the upper portion.

Truth be told, I'm still getting used to how to handle this change myself. I don't really know which products to use (I've experimented with mixed success but usually just don't have the spoons), or best ways of styling (if any other curly-haired EAsians out there have tips, I would be much obliged 😭)

And yeah, I probably have some internalized bias that makes me feel negatively, and think of my hair type now as basically just "difficult." I'm sure once I figure out how to embrace and manage it properly, it'll be a lot easier and I'll find more to like, but that's a little bit of a personal journey, and coming to accept things more doesn't mean that the tendencies of my hair will change, so this is just a description of the way it acts, and things that may be a bit more unusual compared to what I know about other hair types.

I'm not sure if I'm reading much into it, but looking at EAsian art and cartoons vs western art and cartoons, I'll often see western art and animation drawing out the whole shape of the hair on the head, with a uniform direction of curl and motion, while EAsian artists define sections and strands specifically, even when straight. I wonder if that has something to do with the way hair behaves differently and peoples' familiarity with it. It may, it may not-- it's still kind of interesting to me, because when I see a character with touseled or curly hair in EAsian media or drawn by an EAsian artist, it usually ends up looking a lot more like mine than western hair-drawing methods.

Anyway, this has been very long, but I hope it's at least a little bit helpful! Other EAsian people are more than welcome to add onto this post with their own hair experiences too!

[fireemblems24]

So now that you’ve had a good few chapters of playing Hopes any thoughts on the characters’ portrayals in Hopes so far compared to how you thought of them in 3H? For me I definitely have some Takes™️ on the way certain characters ended up being handled in Hopes vs 3H. For the sake of spoilers the only take I will mention at the moment is that Hopes!Caspar SUCKS.

Like they took everything I hated about CF!Caspar and then dialed that up to a hundred. I hate how much of a violent warmonger he is. I hate how much of a moron they make him! Like he has his dense moments in 3H but in Hopes it’s like he’s an actual dumbass (derogatory) with that whole “chapper” excuse of a joke or him somehow not understanding why the people his side are invading would not hold back against his side when they get the chance to strike back. Like what happened to the non-CF Caspar who would understand when other characters expressed negative feelings towards Adrestia because he was aware of the Empire’s past interactions with other countries? The Caspar who would even feel guilt and responsibility for such pain even though he personally didn’t take part in those conflicts, just because he’s his father’s son? The Caspar who had an extremely complex talk with Catherine about ideals in battle and trying to do the right thing?

Sorry for the rant when I just wanted to get your opinion, it’s just that Caspar’s characterization in Hopes is one of the ones I feel strongest about because of how mad I got with it. Turning the goofy and dense but surprisingly compelling and endearing Caspar into THAT was something.

Whoever you are OP, you are completely right about Hopes!Caspar.

Caspar was never a character I paid much attention too or felt strongly about, but I'm offended by his portrayal in Hopes. I can't imagine how upset people who followed him more feel.

I'm a bit lacking on my Caspar lore, so bear with me, but in Hopes his character revolves almost entirely around pleasing his father and smashing things. Other than that, there's nothing to him. Even someone who doesn't remember a whole lot of details about Caspar knows that's short-changing him.

Where's his friendship with Linhardt? Where's his fear-mixed-with-respect more complicated relationship he had with his father? Where's the guy who called Edelgard out for using him as a talking point for her own views rather than learning how he felt about anything first? Where's the guy who learned more empathy from Ashe and their discussion about thieves?

To be honest, I don't like CF!Caspar either. It seems only when he's forced to fight against the Empire (his people) that he takes war seriously and realizes that "real people" are dying rather than treating it like a jolly good time and chance to just smash things to death for fun. So maybe this is just further proof that Caspar is insufferable unless he fights against the Empire, because that's the only way for him to identify strongly enough with who's dying for him to grow some perspective. Hopes is made worse though, since he's regressed to just letting his dad decide everything and Shez doesn't call Caspar out like Byleth did in CF.

Alois is another one who was done dirty big time. He's nothing but a Jeralt simp with no mention ever of his kids or wife. It's like they took everything endearing about him and deleted it. It's criminal what they did to him.

Of course, there's also, I'm sure, lots of talk about Claude, but that's a whole other can of worms that I'll hold off on until I finish the game.