#also the little ethos are absolute cryptids

[trompettenarrative]

shout out to @tubbytarchia 's ethubs keychain, the art is the cutest thing ever

shall treasure it

[voidmenace]

Just read the post abt redstone and my brain instantly attached to Etho so!!! Can we hear more about the funky man with that artificial bioluminesence

okay so here's the thing; etho didn't start out as the local cryptid slash underground mercenary. actually, he used to be a part-time hero, going out into the field for reconnaissance missions and would help with rescue and recovery efforts. most of the time though, he was a researcher, one of the first to actually discover redstone and realize that it would work really well as a power and conductive source. at this point, so little was known about redstone that there weren't much more than very basic safety precautions, you know? just about anyone in the science or research field could get their hands on it for experimentation.

the problem with redstone is this; when first working with it, you don't really notice much. yes, it'll take power put into it and transmit it somewhere else, and yes, it can be used by itself as an energy source, but no one initially takes into account the long-term effects it has. in small doses, it's fine. you may notice a slight headache, a quick flash of dizziness that barely registers as a problem, or you may come out of the experiments feeling just slightly more tired than you anticipated. nothing to be concerned about, right?

redstone effects accumulate very quickly, and etho and his team are the unfortunate first people to find this out.

etho is the only survivor of a redstone explosion that leaves an entire laboratory and the surrounding twelve mile perimeter basically uninhabitable to most life.

this isn't to say that etho comes out completely unscathed, no. he loses sight in one eye, gains many new chemical burn scars, and causes so much damage to his lungs that he's forced to be on a constant supplementary supply of oxygen. his mask he starts wearing is part aesthetic, part covering the burns from the public eye, and a very large portion a way to give himself that much needed oxygen.

most noticeably, he's gained a faint glow. it's best seen at night, and practically radiates from his blind eye. honestly, it's part of what starts his legend as a cryptid. i mean, if you were to see a vaguely human-shaped figure with a single glowing red eye, you'd be pretty freaked out and say there's a creature haunting the redstone wastelands too, i'm sure.

he kind of....disappears shortly after he recovers from the accident. some say he was taken by the government for experimentation, to further see the long-term effects of redstone on people. some say he crawled off to die on his own like an animal.

his roommate iskall says that he showed up on their doorstep and became a permanent nuisance.

for the most part, etho works as a mercenary, appearing where he's needed and disappearing when he simply doesn't want to be found. he still helps where he can, but tries not to stick around people too much, mostly because the accident also kinda made him permanently radioactive. he doesn't want to risk hurting anyone with his presence.

alright ive given up on vague story-telling, so here's some more little things about etho:

between his lab work from before the accident and the accident itself, he's built up enough of an immunity to redstone that he can handle it bare-handed, and he takes pleasure in doing so in front of others specifically to freak them out

he takes care of a community garden!! no one ever personally sees him out there watering and weeding and planting things, he tends to it when no one is around. some people have tried to leave cameras to catch him in the act, but all photos come out super grainy, and he once again just looks like a dark shadow with a glowing red eye.

he's nearly given iskall a heart attack with that eye, multiple times, when they get up late at night for water and turn to see an ominously glowing eye. he could absolutely warn them that he's there, but he thinks it's just too funny to hear them yelp in fright. they smack him and curse him out every time.

[serendipitous-posts]

I love your white enderman Etho AU. Do you have any head canons?

Yes I do!

He can teleport (duh)

He's not the biggest fan of eye contact

His mouth looks like an enderman's, which is why he wears a mask (his headband can't hide it)

He's very fluffy, with a tail n' stuff

I headcanon white endermen are specifically built to withstand cooler temperatures, so they're fluffy and really like the ice and snow

I also headcanon that endermen just . . bend really easily? It's like their boneless and Etho Has That and it is Horrifying watching him bend into all sorts of shapes

He makes these little garbled purrs when he's happy!

Silk touch hands babey!

Definitively, absolutely turned up outside Area 77 to scare Scar and Doc

*Head in hands* O-Oh my god, Etho's the alien that Scar captured in the jungle! Scar was just like beef? and Etho was never gonna pass up free food

Scar, upon catching a glimpse of the 'snowman': that's my alien friend :D Xisuma, who has not been keeping up with that: your what now??

Okay so; Etho's headband is damaged in the aftermath of the Jungle, and it takes ages to fix, because he has to resow the sigils in by hand and they are tiny

Add that into the fact that he's spent the better part of a year being taken over by a jungle, he's jumpy. So he starts showing his true form more and more, both out of necessity and comfort

Xisuma thinks Etho is a hacker, and wants him gone, but for some reason can't find any other player being listed. hmm. . . . .

Scar and Doc both want to put Etho into Area 77

I think the person who would first figure it out would be Rendog, since he's a werewolf, and knows transformations plus, yknow

Ren: Hey Etho why do you smell like the snowman

Etho, nervous: Uhh. He came over for pets

Since Xisuma is a voidwalker and Etho is an enderman, aka from the void, Xisuma sometimes feels weird around him. Not bad. . . just weird

Grian would be the most enthusiastic about catching him-that man does not know when to let things go. He is one of the first to join the cryptid hunters club. But the snowman keeps evading them! Clearly they need better traps! And who better to ask for help than the redstone pioneer himself?

[justletmeplayminecraft]

Hermitcraft Great British Bake Off AU

(Or the Great British Baking Show outside the UK)

With the start of a new series, I thought I'd compile this AU I came up with a while ago. Big shout out to @skywillsometimeswrite who helped me brainstorm nearly all of this (and accidentally got into the series sorry. Time to get emotional over bakers again.) 

It's Great British Bake Off, where the hermits take the place of the contestants, judges and some of the crew (with the recap boys as the hosts!) It follows the structure of the show, but to add maximum fluffiness, nobody leaves and the show works on a point system instead. The loser of each week does the washing up. (Not that the winner matters, this is all about the shenanigans.) Further explanations and what role each hermit fills with a short bio is under the cut!

The recording structure follows the usual routine. It takes place over several weeks, with the recording happening at the weekend. They stay at a hotel over the weekend. On the Saturday they record the Signature Challenge and the Technical. On the Sunday they film the Showstopper. Each week is themed, with the challenges fitting into that theme. The themes are often based around a certain kind of baking (pastry, bread, chocolate) but sometimes around time periods, places, or diets. I recommend googling or watching an episode of the show but a brief explanation of the challenges:

The Signature Challenge: They're given a certain thing (cake, pastry, biscuit, etc) to create. They've been able to practice at home. This is the opportunity to show personality and a home-cooked, rustic style with tried and tested bakes.

The Technical: The Judges take turns each week to set a recipe for an often uncommon bake. The recipe is bare-bones and the bakers have to use their intuition and knowledge about baking to create what's intended. This round is unpractised, and judged blind, with the judges outside the tent for the duration. The aim is to perfectly replicate the recipe given and that's how they're judged.

The Showstopper: A chance to bring out the big guns! They're often given a theme and a type of bake and then the contestants can go wild. The aim is to create something of professional quality, that makes the judges go 'wow' and still tastes good. Also practiced over the week, though sometimes less due to the size of the bakes.

Now onto the hermits:

The Judges are TFC and Biffa. TFC is the friendlier of the two. He does his best to find positives in bakes, although he enjoys making jokes about things that go wrong. Most of the contestants come to think of him as a grandad. Biffa gives more thorough criticism, but it helps the contestants improve a lot and is tailored towards the advice they need. They enjoy talking to the contestants about their bakes and lives outside the tent, both on and off camera. They've both had long careers in the industry.

The Hosts are our recap boys, Pixelriffs and Zloy. They're a dynamic duo in front of the camera, riffing off each other and the contestants naturally. They have a good balance of improvisation and planned skits. Zloy will doodle scenes from the tent during their downtime.

In alphabetical order, the Contestants:

1. Beef: Works as a butcher. It's often joked about, and not helped by him spilling red food colouring on his apron early in the series. He's incredibly good at piping and often creates artworks on top of his bakes for decoration. Absolutely smashes any biscuit decoration.

2. Cleo: Works as a teacher. Ironically, has to be censored at least once an episode and continuously hopes none of her students watch. It's hard to tell what she's doing until the last minute when she pulls it all together. She enjoys making little figures from fondant or rice crispy marshmallow mix.

3. Cub: Runs a sports equipment company. He likes coming up with creative solutions to the challenges and surprises the others by how focused he can become once in the zone. He has a deadpan sense of humour and a willingness to commit to bits. Often banters with Scar.

4. Etho: His job seems to change every time he mentions it. It never fails to catch the others off guard. He rarely explains his bakes, and his ability to mix flavours that shouldn't work but somehow do is infuriating. Sometimes, as he waits for things to bake, he uses the free time to play music on the baking equipment.

5. False: Works as a bodyguard. She says the details of her job are classified and never brings it up again. Nobody is sure if she's joking, but she's built. She's a very precise builder, with perfectionist tendencies that can sometimes come back to bite her if she focuses on them too much. She jumps between different themes with ease when decorating.

6. Grian: Works as an architect. He's fond of going big with his bakes, trying to push the limits of what's possible. However, he often gives himself too much to do, and ends up having to rush, disguise unfinished parts or the other contestants help him finish. He's bubbly in front of the camera and enjoys the occasional prank.

7. Impulse: Works as an electrical engineer. Also anxiety central. He's a very technical baker who's brilliant at following recipes. However, he will restart a bake if very minor things go wrong, which often leaves him pressed for time. Despite this, he's one of the most likely people to jump in and help someone who's struggling.

8. Keralis: Owns a bookstore. He loves decorating and his bakes are always some of the prettiest in the tent. Although he has a sleek, modern style, he can branch out when needed. He makes up his own pronunciation for ingredients, bakes and the other people in the tent. Gradually, everyone else starts using them too.

9. Scar: Works as a landscaper. Skilled at detailing and has out of the box thinking for his designs. Likes creating vehicles. However, sometimes he finds himself hiding bad baking with his decoration. His name proves accurate when half of his arm ends up bandaged in the first episode. Becomes good friends with Bdubs because of this.

10. Stress: Works as a personal trainer. Her bakes are always bright and colourful. It isn't a Stress bake if it doesn't make you smile. She's fairly equal on her decorating and her baking and enjoys a cartoonish style. A delight to have in the tent, loves helping other contestants and cheers them up if something doesn't go to plan.

11. xB: Medical researcher. His bakes are always creative, with fun stories behind them, if a bit dark. He's soft-spoken and doesn't raise his voice. He never quite swears but always comes close. The others can tell something's gone wrong when they hear a quiet 'dangit' or 'son of a-' and somebody jumps to find out what's happened.

12. Xisuma: Works as bee-keeper. He loves big shapes and patterns in his bakes. Often keeps things healthy(ish). He's primarily a technical baker and researches and practices his bakes extensively. However, he has a tendency to panic and makes silly mistakes (salt instead of sugar, forget to turn on the oven, etc.) 

The Crew Members:

Camera Crew:

Mumbo: Sometimes mistaken for being on a work placement/internship. He enjoys his work and takes a lot of the detail shots of the bakes. Although he can keep to himself, Iskall often brings him out of his shell and encourages him to chat with the contestants.

Ren: He's an incredibly chill presence to be around. He'll do his best to chat with contestants in-between filming and try to calm them down or hype them up. Usually he films stressful sequences with a reassuring smile and kind words. He enjoys singing in their downtime.

Zed: Very bouncy. He enjoys rushing around the tent to get over the shoulder shots or focus on the detail. He's good friends with Tango, and maybe he occasionally worries he’s ‘broken’ something to get the chance to talk to him on set. 

Sound:

Wels: He's calm and organised. He tests everybody's microphones are working and manages audio levels. He's good at handling distractions, but if they manage to catch him off-set they find he has a fun sense of humour and can give genuinely good advice. Enjoys singing to test the microphones when he thinks nobody's listening.

Wardrobe:

Iskall: Most of his work is done off-set, and he becomes good friends with the contestants, discussing their plans for bakes and chatting. He'll dart onto set to touch up make up when the cameras are off, offering words of encouragement as he does. Though it’s a bit concerning when he calls people’s bakes ‘of doom’.

On-site Medic:

Bdubs: Bdubs is a familiar sight with the accident prone contestants. He's always there with calm words and enthusiasm, talking the contestant down from their worry about their injury, helping them to relax. Despite his silliness, it's obvious he takes his job seriously. The contestants are glad to have him.

Set Manager:

Jevin: A bit chaotic, but he helps make sure things are set for filming. He enjoys getting the ingredients ready for the day and working out what they'll need. He also enjoys bullying Hypno. They've worked together a few times now. He enjoys a good joke when he gets the chance.

Hypno: Fairly relaxed, but he can appreciate a good joke and he appreciates Jevin. He helps organise ingredients and makes sure that things run smoothly on set. Very precise with his work, he doesn't cut corners and makes sure everyone has what they need, when they need it. A good person for the contestants to talk to.

Researcher:

Joe: He takes great pride in searching recipes, trying new things and adding them to his repertoire. Sure he might use a few too many words, but he's good at his job. He's not often on set, working mostly with Jevin and Hypno behind the scenes. But he might step in as tech if he's needed. A bit of a cryptid to the contestants.

Technicians:

Tango: A good friend of Zed. Even though he has some... Less than professional terms, he does his job well, and enjoys the opportunities he gets to socialise with the bakers. Very smiley and friendly, however if he’s in the tent, it’s likely something has gone very wrong. He's terrible at baking himself, much to the amusement of those who find out.

Doc: More serious than Tango, he's there to do a job, not make friends. Then he ends up making friends anyway. They're infectious. Grian enjoys 'breaking' things to annoy him (and have a chance to pull him on set to talk to him.) He does, secretly, enjoy the shenanigans the contestants get up to. But he'd never admit it.

Keeping in mind, I care less about the accuracy of this and more about The Shenanigans:

The first time Xisuma gets everything correct in a bake, he is convinced he’s still got something wrong. He spends the entire time until judging expecting there will be something wrong with it that they only discover during judging. A lot of memes are made out of his worrying.

At the end of filming during the heatwave, they have a lake party. Someone challenges Cub to jump in the lake and he cannonballs straight in. The others are surprised. Scar, who knows him well enough by then, is not. Doc is dragged in. Xisuma sits neatly on the edge and looks so relaxed they’d feel too guilty pulling him in. Keralis sits next to him and splashes him a little instead.

Cleo will make frequent asides to her students to try and impart good messages. Sometimes she swears during them. Then swears again upon realising. She uses her teacher voice on the other contestants a few times by accident (and on purpose.)

Someone doubts False’s strength. It’s probably Grian. She makes a beeline straight for him and hauls him onto her shoulder. And possibly into the lake. She makes it her mission to pick up most of the guys, whether they’re ready or not (with prior consent, of course.)

Stress and False work out together in the mornings. Sometimes some of the other contestants will join them and she’ll lead an impromptu work out session. She also does yoga in the evenings to calm down after filming. A fair few join her for that. 

Some of Etho’s jobs include: ‘I’m a gardener so I want this cake to include edible flowers’, ‘I’m a beekeeper so I wanted to use honey.’, ‘I’m a piano tuner so music is a big part of my life’, ‘I used to hack as a part-time job’. His job subtitle changes each episode. He gets a lot of concerned looks from other contestants.

Grian and Scar become frenemies because they’re bench buddies. Grian loves bullying Mumbo off-camera. He argues with Iskall over wearing anything but a red sweater. He loves complimenting everyone’s bakes. He makes a lot of friends. 

Tango and Zed often try to take jobs on the same productions. Zed likes to bother Tango with stupid ways to make broken tech work. Impulse will sit there and try to fix it in earnest. They have to remind Impulse he’s supposed to having a break before filming resumes. The three quickly become friends and can be found hanging out together.

During one of the heatwaves, Impulse near passes out from heat exhaustion. There’s eleven concerned people crowding around him, and it’s one of the only times Bdubs has to seriously raise his voice to gain control of the situation. The others are all sat outside in the shade and given water. Impulse goes back to the hotel and is ambushed by a lot of very concerned friends later that day. They take good care of him and threaten to beat him up if he doesn’t take better care of himself.

During Saturday evenings is when they’ll all lounge around the hotel and hype each other up for the show stopper. They like discussing what their plans are and sharing their ideas. A lot of dumb things happen to help work off the nervous excitement. 

There’s also a lot of calming each other down when they’re stressed out and caring about each other. It’s the Found Family VibesTM.

Even though washing up is supposed to be a punishment, a group of them usually end up doing it together and singing loudly and terribly to the radio.

One of the contestants catches Wels singing as he tests his microphone and drags him outside to come and jam with the contestants. Ren joins in. Etho provides backing. It delays things a little but they agree it’s worth it.

Keralis and Beef at some point have some made up war between them that is completely stupid, entirely overdramatic, and gives all the contestants a lot to laugh about.

There is, absolutely, a prank war part way through the season. It also extends off-set. Nobody is safe.

I haven’t seen anyone doing this AU before, and I apologise if they have! I hope there’s enough unique ideas to set it apart. But yeah, this is the AU I use when I just want some Fluffy content. Thanks for reading!

[holsten-from-hasa]

ok so i have many thoughts about classes and aspects just In General so hello im here to offer other ideas for them. but. pretty much just for the hermits i know well. but also congrats on the handles because holy hell i despise gcat rules

acbdubs - thief of time csomeone with better knowledge of s5 bdubs would have more of an accurate idea of his full character, but im a 3l-present bdubs enjoyer though i keep meaning to watch older stuff of his. thieves in canon homestuck are generally assholes, but they dont have to be. really the only thing that defines the class is a lack of their aspect that they desperately wish to change and once they have it, they hoard it. plus they tend to think theyre literally the best ever especially in regards to their aspect. its a little on the nose for recent bdubs, giving him time as an aspect, but he does have a pretty constant clock motif in his character along with always sleeping away the night. oh and also just. bringing mountains into existence in a literal week. thats some time fuckery right there, magical or otherwise. overall, he does fit thief of time in more general character sense though theres probably a more fitting classpect i didnt consider.

cleo - witch of life honestly? life as an aspect really fits cleo, given her wonderful armour stand work and her being a zombie. witches manipulate their aspect and are quite skilled with it, in some sense it could be said cleo is manipulating her own life to stay alive despite being a zombie. plus, with the way she builds armourstand models. that could be seen as creating, but the methods she uses (the armourstand book, slowly nudging pieces into place) feels much more like a manipulator class to me.

cub - heir of rage with the way cub operates, his makes things seem like the only logical way things could be done. or like things just fall into place around him. thats how an heir often operates, their aspect guides them and changes the world through them. and cub absolutely makes that work in his favour. rage is the aspect of disbelief, passion, revolution, skepticism, and a lot more. its also often the aspect associated with absolutely abusing loopholes in the plot. which seems to fit cub quite well. sure rage players are often loud, angry people but anger isnt the only part of the rage aspect, and some players may just bypass it entirely.

doc - knight of doom hes not particularly tied to the literal death and decay sides of the doom aspect, but he is the person on the server known for tearing apart reality. which, in a game world, means the code and systems and exploits tied in them. i was considering mage for his class, but he has stated before that hes not the man with all of the knowledge and i wanted to reflect that. i gave him knight because he uses his aspect and is incredibly skilled with it, having abilities most wouldnt thanks to the community he works with.

etho - maid of void really, etho is a cryptid on the server. and so is his upload schedule. secrets and confusion is a huge part of void, and really all etho does is create them around him wherever he goes.

gem - sylph of space or sylph of life id say gem is more tied to creation and creativity than life itself, though the same could be said for many of the builders who simply bring incredible things into existence. however, i can clearly see life in gems character. especially with the cottagecore base last season and living in a treehouse this season. i cant really justify the class she just. she has the Vibes, yknow?

grian - witch of rage the angelic symbolism of hope does fit some of his fanon lore quite well, but this man is a gremlin who will come up with rules then tear them down right in front of the viewer's eyes. he will change things on the fly, altering the course of events. he manipulates rage so well and so casually, and is even doing it with The Entity this season. i love that funky rock but just?? the fact it exists and also both steals pieces from the world while also growing them itself fits the rage aspect so well.

impulse - seer of light yeah no this is accurate this man is such a goddamn seer. there may be a better aspect but also it does just fit well.

joe - bard of mind the way Joe is just Joe falls entirely into the realm of the bard class, though not one at the start of their character arc by any means. no offense bards but you guys are a mess before the character development kicks in <3. joe is absurd but in a planned out and routine way, he falls cleanly into mind like that. bards are a destructive class, but they more often destroy through their aspect rather than their aspect directly, especially later down the line. a joe hills video is routine and predictable in the most unpredictable kind of way.

mumbo - page of mind this is hilarious but also fits so well. can you imagine mumbo in the page god tier. go on, its cursed and hilarious. pant rights removed, moustache man

scar - witch of hope he tells a story with each and every one of his builds, pulling your belief in just the right direction to see the magic happen. plus hes the biggest conman out there and have you heard about the magic crystals.

i dont have any more opinions rn but. if you want more help i can absolutely ramble about classpects some more. i dont knwo the characters well enough to make opinions honestly

Alright anyone who sees this who is a homestuck and a Hermitcraft fan I need help

I decided I might do a hermitstuck thing in honor of Hermitcraft’s 10th anniversary and Homestuck’s 13th anniversary (see this post) and this is what I have

I will not be taking any criticism towards the handles (because they’re funny) and maybe the blood color but I will be taking criticisms towards the lunar sway, aspects and classes because I had to take 2 personality tests (one of them being the official true sign test) for both of them 26 times and research everyone else’s takes on them and I’m still not sure since a lot of the descriptions are very vague like all personality tests are

So yes, if you’d like to criticize, discuss and/or educate me about all of this please do I don’t trust myself with this

[serendipitous-posts]

That white enderman etho au is wildin dyou have any more

Absolutely!

Etho is an Old Player, as we all know. He's one of the pioneers of redstone, has been playing for years.

That means he was around when there was discrimination towards hybrids. It was difficult for him to be listened to

So! Magic bandanna!

And yes, he could take it off and show the other Hermits, but having another form allows him to mess with the others and get away with it

Iskall may have been the first to come face to face with him, but they've all kind of known he was there

And by that I mean they were all stalked by Etho, and whenever they turned around they would see glowing red eyes peering out at them from bushes

(Scar screamed so loud the entire server came running. It was-great)

Of course, everyone gets very invested in finding the cryptid. They regularly explore it's 'territory', read: an area that has a good amount of redstone ore

In my mind I see it as one of those sequences of still images. One picture-they're walking down the dirt path, the next they're at the mouth of a cave, next they're in the cave, there's a blurry figure in the distance, next we see the figure. It's Etho, in his ender form, hunched over with his back turned to the camera, eating what looks to be blood. Next photo, he turns around, his eyes reflective from the camera. Next he is standing up, next running at them

The last photo is of the camera on the ground

He can eat redstone! He finds it delicious!

The others start building traps and eventually he starts dismantling them. The hermits, are, of course, thrilled. Capable of higher thought like this?

They start joking that the cryptid, which hides away from society except to mess with them, is good with redstone and is a bit of an ass, is the Hermit's mascot

They also start joking that he's Etho. So.

Xisuma is a little worried though. Mob's can't have this kind of intelligence. The only explanation is that someone hacked into Hermitcraft and is staying here without anyone's permission.