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lyneira · 2 years ago

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♤ "Not worthy?" I'll show you differently ♤

SMUT - MINORS DNI

-> how would he react to a reader who's self-conscious and ends up distancing themselves from him when others insult them and say that they shouldn't be together? (based on this request!)

All characters are depicted as 18+

fem!reader x twisted wonderland characters / cw: penetration, cunnilingus, fingering, blowjob, mirror sex

"I'll make you feel loved enough that you won't forget it"

Epel, LEONA, Jack, Ace, Silver, Floyd

I don't see them viewing it as a big problem initially because he's confident that he'll be able to make things right quickly. You just need some reassurance, that's all.

He's not going to confront you directly. He won't need to; His actions toward you would be enough to say that what others were saying was indefinitely wrong.

He'll become more handsy and more forward with his PDA, always making sure that he's holding you or touching you in some way. He'll put his hand on your waist and pull you in close, seldom ever releasing his grasp on you; He'll kiss you more often, ensuring to elongate the kiss for a long time even when there were a lot of people around. When he'd pull away, allowing you to take a breath, he'd shoot a glare at anyone who was staring, daring them to say something.

He'll do all of this as to indirectly tell you, "Hey, I don't care what anyone says or thinks. I'm not letting you go". Yet, if you were still acting distant, then he'd have no choice but to confront you directly.

When he finally does, he'll back you into a corner and ask with frustration, "How come you're still distancing yourself from me? Am I not showing you enough affection?" He'll then lower his tone, "You don't need to run away from me...I love you, y/n...and there's nothing that anyone can say that will ever change that...", looking at you with that rare softness in his eyes that he only showed when he was pouring his heart out. And that's how you know he really meant it.

That look would further soften when you suddenly hug him tightly, and after melting in each other’s arms, he'll whisper into your ear, "I'll make sure you understand how much I love you tonight. Remember this moment whenever you find yourself doubting it"

And when you two make love that night, he'll seem a bit rough initially. He'll be pinning arms above your head, grasped tightly, kissing you ferociously that your teeth often clash, sucking on your skin so intensely, leaving marks of purple, and thrusting himself into you with so much force that you feel like the bed is going to break (which, it almost does, heh)

But after his first climax, releasing his remaining frustrations, he'll slow it down, also releasing his tight grip on your wrists to embrace you protectively, kissing up and down your neck as he thrusts long, slow strokes into you. He'd be all over you. His hands, his lips, and his tongue would again caress every spot on your body, especially on the spots he left a hickey on. He'd kiss them softly, and would cheekily smile into your skin, knowing that these marks would be visible for all to see the next day. After all, they need to know that you belong to him, just as his heart belongs to you.

"Can you SEE how much I love you?"

VIL, Jade, Rook, Jamil, Lilia, Rollo, Azul

You're self conscious? On his watch? Absolutely not.

Seems like you need to SEE how much he loves you in order to really believe it. So after quickly dealing with those who had planted their foolish ideas into your mind, he'll immediately take you to his room to help you confront your problem head on.

He'll be sitting at the edge of his bed, as he speaks to you, "Dear, I've noticed that you've been shying away from me because you've become self-conscious...you need not be. Do not listen to what others say, they don't matter. I adore you just as you are."

When he sees you finally ease up by his words, he'll smile tenderly at you and will then pat his thigh, "Come here..."

You do as you are told, and when you get close to him, he'll suddenly pull you onto his lap, wrapping his arms firmly around your waist, trapping you in his embrace. Funny thing is, up until now, you hadn't realized the grand mirror that was in front of you two. Had he always had that there? In fact, he did not. But today, he needed it for his plan to help you become less conscious. Oh, you're in for it now 😏

"I'm glad you've noticed the mirror. Keep your eyes on it...no matter what I do", he'll mention as he narrows his look into your eyes in its reflection, and you can definitely tell he was plotting something. You were about to ask about it until he surprises you with a multitude of kisses up and down your neck and down your shoulders. If you asked if you could face him, he'd immediately turn you down, telling you to look into the mirror.

And as he became more sensual, letting his hands roam up your body to cup your breasts and fondle them as he continued to kiss your jaw and insisted you to keep your eyes glued to the mirror, you eventually realized his plan: he was going to make you watch yourself as he made love to you.

You figured that it would be easy to endure, but soon enough, you'd think otherwise as he'd further surprise you with his touches.

He'd bring his hands down to your waistband and begin pulling your pants off so that your lower half was now bare. Then, bringing his hands back up to your thighs, he'd begin to spread your legs open slowly, while looking in the mirror to enjoy the view of your pussy all soaking wet for him. "Ah~ You're so wet", he'll grin, eyes half-lidded at the sight. He'll hover a hand over your heat and begins to rub his middle finger up and down your slick, earning a shudder from you. After rubbing it enough, he'll insert it into your hole, massaging your insides and finding that sensitive spot that has you squeezing onto his finger.

You look away from the mirror and shut your eyes at the pleasure he's giving you, but he'll click his tongue, and stops his motions at your reaction, "That won't do, dear. Don't look away". With his other hand, he'll grab your chin and make you face the mirror once more, "Open your eyes. You need to watch as I pleasure you" and with the lack of friction making you antsy, you open your eyes to watch the erotic sight of him touching you. "Good girl", he'll hum. And for that, he'll reward you by using his other hand to rub circles on your clit.

He'll continue to pleasure you while making you watch him, becoming pleased with himself as he was getting you to stare at the sight with less hesitation each time.

When at last he has himself inserted in you, thrusting up into you relentlessly as you both watch yourselves in the mirror, mouths agape as you both moan and pant, faces flushed, eyes heavy with lust, bodies wet from sweat and arousal, he'll lean in towards you ear, sultry whispering,

"Get used to this image, my love...become so accustomed to it that it won't matter what anyone says. You'll remember that you and I are meant to be together...joined as one both body and soul, just like this"

"Do you know what you do to me?"

MALLEUS, Sebek, Deuce, Riddle, Idia

He'd full of worry when you distance yourself from him, wondering if he had done or said something to cause it. Though, hen he finds out that the reason for it was your self-consciousness and the gossip of others that had influenced it, he is fuming. Who dares to insult his darling?! To make you feel this way? He'd be so tempted to make them endure his wrath, but he'd ultimately decide to deal with it later. The most important thing right now was you. It pained him to see you look at yourself that way when he thought the entire world of you. (He practically kisses the ground you walk on, lol)

So he would waste zero time to confront you because there's no way he was going to let you think that he didn't love and care for you.

Do you know exactly the effect you have on him? He'll let you know. He'll tell you how warm you make him feel inside, how you ease him while still managing to give him butterflies in his stomach everytime you laugh or smile at him, how grateful he is to have you in his life. He'll then take your hand, bring it up to his face, and lean his cheek into your palm, telling you how he easily melts into your touch and submits himself to you.

He'll guide your hand down his body, allowing you to feel the heat of his skin, down to his chest, where you can feel the pounding of his heart.

"Feel the rhythm of my heart...it only beats like that for you. You mean everything to me, y/n. Never forget that", and he would press a kiss onto your lips, desperation imbued into them. That desperation would soon turn into passion when you gladly returned his fervor, letting him know that you understood him and relief washed over him.

As you two fiercely kissed, devouring each other's mouths, letting your tongues dance, he realized that he was still holding your hand. So, he'd take the chance to continue guiding your hand further down his body to show you another effect you had on him. You'd gasp when your hand met with his clothed erection, breaking the kiss to look down at it and back up at him. He'll have a faint blush on his cheeks, but will look at you with a firmness in his eyes, "Only you make me feel this way." He'll release his grasp on you, yet, you'll maintain your grasp on him, ready to show him the love and affection that he showed you.

And indeed, you'll feel how enamored and obsessed you make him when you pull down his pants to free his throbbing cock, to lick it, suck on it, bounce on it, ride it, and squeeze it so good that the evidence of his love will be buried deep inside of you and will continue to overflow.

Extra:

He'll also show you what you do to him even when he wasn't with you at the moment. Even if you were away for a while, he'd send you a video touching himself to you. In the video, you'll see his beautiful face twisted in need as you listen to him panting, gasping, and moaning out your name numerous times, accompanied with the wet sounds of his sex being attended to. This would go on for several minutes for you to enjoy, and in the after his release, he'll look hazily to the camera, cheeks flushed, semen stained on his hand, abdomen, and thighs, lips parted as he breathlessly heaves out, "This is what you do to me"

If you were there, he wouldn't have made such a mess everywhere 'cause he would have made his mess inside of you instead, just sayin' ;)

(Cater isn't a part of this category, but I can totally see him doing this too!)

"I love your..."

NEIGE, Cater, KALIM, Che'nya, Trey, Ruggie

You distancing yourself from him would immediately have alarms going off in his head because this would be highly unusual. You two were always joined at the hip (sometimes literally) after all. When he realizes that you're self-conscious, he'll immediately reassure you.

"You know what I love so much about you? I'll tell you!" He'll grab your hand and bring it up to his lips, "I love your touch", and will kiss your palm. He'll then lean towards your face so that his lips were ghosting your forehead, "I love your beautiful mind", and kisses it. He'll then kiss the corner of your lips, "Your pretty smile", which would earn him that beloved expression from you, to his delight. He'll kiss down your neck, "Your voice and the things you say to me", and as he tries to kiss your collarbone, he will pull off your top to expose more of the skin he can kiss. He'll continue down towards your chest, kissing your warm bosom, "Your kind heart and affection". And he'll go on to kissing all over your body as he says what he adores and loves about you, removing any more clothing that might hinder his lips from meeting your skin.

With all his kisses, you were nearly laid entirely bare. All of your clothing were off except for your panties. As he lowers himself down to hover his lips on your clothed sex, he'll look up at you, blush dusted on his cheeks and a sensual look in his eye, "Would you allow me to continue saying what else I love about you?". And with your nod of permission, he'll slip the garment off, and whisper, "I love the way you taste" before giving a deep kiss to your lips. He'll go on to kiss it repeatedly and as you moan and sigh from his kisses below, he'll shakily breathe out, "I love the sounds you make when I'm making you feel good...a-ah..! You make me feel so good" as he mindlessly grinds into the mattress, pre-cum staining the bed, aroused by you.

You'd think he'd be done after letting you know the numerous things he loved about you, but he still had one more he had to say. So after letting you release your nectar onto his lips and drinking it, he's gonna line himself up to your dripping entrance, and will say, "I love being inside you", before inserting himself into your heat. He'll continue to mutter on with each thrust, "oh, you're so warm...you take me in so well...I love it...I love you....so very much"

And with all of the places he's kissed and all of his words of adoration, I'm sure you'll understand the magnitude of his love for you by the end of the night

a/n: this one was much longer than usual! Some seem a bit ooc and I honestly kinda gave up at the ends of most afshdkwgjak oh well 🫤

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doberbutts · 2 months ago

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Tbh I think the comparison to white people might be some simple us vs them thinking (maybe not all the time, though). White people complaining about oppression = nonsense/overeaggeration (if you're myopic), therefore comparing transmascs to white people is a way to call what they say nonsense. Or, if you're under the impression oppression=good person points, then white = bad/wrong, therefore transmascs are bad/wrong. Idk. Lots of these folks have some black/white thinking.

I think the answer is much easier than that.

The majority of people I see using the race analogy to draw a parallel of white vs black racism and trans man vs woman oppression are white themselves. Not everyone, but I would say my casual scroll of Bad Take Havers usually reveals whiteness here.

It does not surprise me at all that the very same white people doing this do not have the nuanced racial understanding to be able to reflect how, for instance, both black communities and latine communities experience racism in different yet similar ways, and how there is both bad blood and also shared history and solidarity between both communities, with many people who exist somewhere in between (afrolatinos) and people who exist completely outside of this equation (other marginalized races of color) or on the fringes (other mixed people of color but with only one of the involved races in this venn diagram) that also may experience their own oppression.

And so, they don't even think to use the comparison of black and Latino understanding, instead choosing to reach for white vs black racial dynamics. They don't have the understanding necessary to get why that's neither a good comparison nor is it a fair one to use especially when this particular conversation was started by trans mascs of color and how prior conversations regarding trans men and mascs occupying a marginalized gender were started by both (cis *and* trans) women of color and trans men and mascs of color.

It also does not escape my attention that those insisting that not only do trans men and mascs have privilege (something I do not completely disagree with, although I think as always it is more nuanced than "have" vs "have not") but also that trans men and mascs are specifically an *oppressor class* are also largely white, and show an inability to understand that "privilege" does not always equally translate to "oppressor". This comes to a head when discussing trans men in powerful positions- teachers, doctors, politicians, business owners, religious leaders, even celebrities- and whether they are pushing harmful rhetoric or if they are holding the line and refusing to budge.

And, while not true in all cases and certainly no one is perfect, because people are people and thus imperfect at the best of times, the majority of all trans people in power hold the line and refuse to budge regarding harm to our community. We can all think of examples- usually celebrities- of otherwise, but those pushing for laws and change are generally hand-in-hand with each other keeping step and refusing to leave their fellow siblings behind.

This does not mean that we cannot *contribute to* or even *lean on* transmisogyny- remember, there were cis women on the Supreme Court gleefully voting away abortion rights even though it directly affects them. There is no identity that makes you immune to bigoted bias, and no identity that protects you from doing harm to others. That is on each of us to do better, to each out in fellowship and solidarity to our fellow humans, and to lift each other out of the pit.

Much like how a Latino friend of mine may experience privilege in that he does not experience the antiblackness I do, and much how I may have privilege that I speak English as my mother tongue and he doesn't in this largely English-language-dominated country, neither of us are inherently each other's oppressors unless we are acting on oppressive bias. Intentionally or otherwise.

Oppression is action, not existence.

But again, I am not surprised a group of largely white people do not understand nearly enough of this nuance as it applies to race to then be able to apply it to gender.

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starlightshadowsworld · 3 months ago

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I have a headcannon that a lot of the orphanage staff fought in the Great War. They were originally from other countries that were allied with Japan before settling down there.

And work in an orphanage because orphanage staff were in high demand after the war due to how many were orphaned because of it.

The Headmaster himself grew up during war times and I feel he’d open his doors to them.

They’re just as cruel as the native staff with the added bonus that they will speak their mother tongue. They do not care at all of the kids don’t know what they’re talking about.

‘I don’t understand’ is not a valid excuse. So the kids had to learn and adapt in order to not to be punished for ‘disobedience’ for not knowing other languages than Japanese.

This results in Atsushi being multilingual.

He doesn’t actually know it’s not a normal thing to be because everyone at the orphanage knew several languages outside of their mother tongue. It’s how you survived after all.

I can just imagine so Atsushi is confused when everyone’s trying to figure out Fitzgerald’s message.And he recites it almost perfectly to them.

Because we know European countries such as the UK and France were involved in the war. It stands to reason a number of the orphanage staff would be from European countries.

Hence Atsushi knowing English and well he’s not perfect, far from it. But he also spent at least a decade surrounded by and talking to native speakers. So he knows quite a lot, especially swear words because no one at that place knew how to talk kindly to children.

Especially Atsushi.

I like to think there’s a similar precedence for Yosano. Having to interact and treat soldiers aiding Japan that weren’t Japanese. I can see kid Yosano stubbornly refusing to give up and learned so she could better treat and comfort people.

Even if they’d end up screaming in her face like everyone else did.

So when Atsushi starts to think this is another thing that alienates him from everyone else, Yosano talks to him. She reassures him he’s not alone and knowing other languages helps you connect with people.

Yosano and the others especially Kunikida encourage Atsushi to learn more about the languages he knows. And Atsushi does, he and Yosano pick a language everyday to speak in to each other.

And yeah and their a bit out of practice but they get there. And Atsushi feels a sense of comfort in speaking more than one language, because that was his reality for years.

And this time there’s no punishment for getting things wrong.

To the point Atsushi managed to muster up the courage to talk with foreign clients during non serious cases. And they more often than not think it’s sweet, are happy to see someone try to speak their mother tongue and give him pointers.

Atsushi is able to talk and help people that are often forgotten by society, much like he himself was. And it makes him feel better about it, that he can use this knowledge to help people.

Although he would prefer if Dazai didn’t come to his desk everyday and badger him into teaching him Russian swears.

#bsd atsushi #atsushi nakajima #bsd yosano #yosano akiko #bungou stray dogs #bsd

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d0g-water · 14 days ago

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OMG WTH that fic you posted with rubius included was AMAZING !!

Can we maybe get a part two with reader meeting rubius in person during an event she went to with alex, and getting swooped away to a room with him where he performs unholy things on her while alex is distracted?

this is not necessarily cheating! Maybe alex and reader are opening their walls in their relationship and have been trying out new things to spice shit up in the bedroom!!

Like the other anon said, if this is too much for you to write i understand as well!!!

Also your writing is so super amazing!!!

THANK YOU MY LOVE!! like i said before, your wish is my command!!!! heheeheh

btw pretend they're speaking spanish because i'm not making you guys translate everything (ᵕ—ᴗ—)

another lame fortnite event in madrid! of course, you have to go with him because everyone wants to meet you. they all already know what you look like, so you don't understand why they want to hang out with you, despite not really wanting to be on the internet or around huge people.

they're really looking forward to meeting you, and alex already promised that you'll travel with him no matter how far or how busy... you two will be spending quality time together, wether it was far from home or trying disgusting american food in his car.

you don't regret flying to spain with him, it's a gorgeous country... and you had alex by your side, making it even better.

there was one thing though,

meeting rubius.

the guy that listened to you get eaten out during your first ever conversation with him, you were going to meet him.

you had a feeling he hates you for it. he never spoke to you after that day... your name left his tongue as well.

it was really scary, whatever you'd tell him about that incident was just excuses after excuses. he definitely wouldn't want to hear it, he's under the impression that you're unabashed. that you're a slut. that you're trying to keep alexis all to yourself..

it is what it is, though.

even if he's the host of this event, you shouldn't think about him.

you're here for alex and alex only.

as you stood by alexis, he was chatting away and leaving you in the dust. you've met everyone, and you're too shy to approach absolutely anyone. these people are known by millions of people, constantly having the inability to get through a whole day without being stopped by fans or recognized.

you felt really out of place.

before you could think about it, somebody knew it.

somebody knew you didn't belong there.

you let out a small yelp, feeling a strong force on your body. the collar of your shirt was pulled, and your body was thrown into a whole different room... an empty one. a room where there was only a small couch. this must've been the break room or something..

your eyes look back to see who took you here. you didn't know anybody here. from your intuition, you felt it was a man about to harm you.

what would you tell alexis? would it be your fault for not defending yourself? or protecting yourself? knowing you're somewhere you're unfamiliar with, you still weren't prepared?

it didn't matter.

you weren't prepared in the slightest, you weren't prepared for the swarm of emotions that're going to surround you when you see ruben standing behind you,

with the door locked. just him. and you. alone...

your boyfriend far outside the door, not having any idea where you two are.

his gaze let you know that he had just got what he wanted, his mingy smile making you brittle. you can't read him, and you haven't been able to since the start.

he hates you, doesn't he? what is he going to do to you?

your head was pouring with anxious thoughts, each one got worse and worse. you began to sweat, letting fear take over completely as he shifted closer to you.

it felt as if he can hear what your internal voice is saying.

you couldn't bother to think any more...

his intentions were unpredictable, but something tells you that it has nothing to do with hurting you.

his expression softens, guess he noticed how scared you were, but it didn't change the fact that he isolated you two in a room where nobody entered.

his hands cup your cheeks, and oh god, it felt wrong...

this was your boyfriend's close friend. the same guy has a girlfriend of seven years. you had only started dating alexis not even six months ago...

but you couldn't find yourself to care?

if anything, maybe this could finally answer the question you two have had for so long: can another person have sex with you?

ruben is staring right at your lips, his hands lowering to hold your shoulders as you feel your back get cold. he asks you a question that awakens something in you, "did he eat you right?"

you couldn't answer him, all you could do was sigh and tilt your head back. it wasn't that he was bad, it's just that you didn't know how to answer the question. if you said no, would he tell him and ruin the relationship? if you said yes, would he leave you here neglected?

his lips kiss your sensitive skin, sending shivers down your spine. your grip instantly on the sleeves of his oversized shirt, short gasps escaping your mouth- ruben's like a butterfly on your collar, his kisses are long and all over the place. he's leaving no patch of skin spurned.

his large hand squeezed your hip and his tongue is in your mouth, these sensations from a whole new person are exciting you. ruben has always been pretty, and his voice is what made him so much more desirable.

you never thought a moment like this would happen. especially right now. and you are not wasting it.

it was a perfect day to wear a skirt, maybe it was what urged him to do this. his fingers swirled their way to the inner corners of your thighs, and you hear him curse into the kiss.. he's getting impatient?

there weren't any shorts underneath it either, so his tug on your underwear was relentless.

you laid on the random couch with your legs laced around ruben's arms, his sucks on your clit making you squirm- you moan as quiet as you can. no one should hear you. this was going to be hard to explain...

"ruben, fuck..." you whisper, but it felt like it wasn't enough. he's so good at this, maybe cause he's far more experienced than alexis and probably does this to his girlfriend most of the time. you couldn't help but crave for more, knowing there's more that he can do.

the way he eats is a lot more sensational, he touched the spots that're always overlooked.. and he really likes the way you taste. he dives farther in, every single droplet of you relished by him.

he wanted to continue, but he couldn't. he eventually stopped, letting go of your legs, hovering his body over yours..

"you wanna cum, y/n?" he asks, undressing your top carefully.

he's casting a dangerous spell on you, but you don't mind it in the slightest. you let him set your tits free, answering his question, "yes, ruben."

you hear some slight clanking when his hands disappear from your vision, must've been from his belt. you were kind of running out of patience, you wanted his cock inside you now,

but he did the opposite.

you felt his large dick fit between your wet folds, and him leaning into your chest to treat himself with your nipple.

your hands grasp onto the cushions of the couch, his hips gently rocking against your pussy- loud slick sounds echoing around the room, hidden by the loud crowd outside.

"oh god- ah, ruben..." your whine eggs him to keep going, but much better than before.

he grunts at how wet you are on his cock, voice muffling out "you're beautiful.", especially when his tip is swallowed by that lubricious pussy of yours.

fuck, he grinds so good. it was all for one person at first, but now, you're lucky enough to know how fucking amazing he is at this.

your breast is covered in saliva, and now he's leaving splotches around your chest. he's bringing you closer.. you're not sure if he's doing this to tease you, earlier you revealed to him how fragile you are.. how easy it is turn you on.

as stated earlier, you can't read him.

he lets out the hottest groan you've ever heard when he cums, decorating your pelvis with his nut. a part of you really wishes he came inside, but you'll take what you can get.

he lets you cum tonight, on his fingers.

they're long and skinny, like alex's, but his arms never got tired... even at the quick pace he was going when they were inside of you.

he jabbed at your cervix until you couldn't take it anymore, giving you the hardest orgasm you've had in a while. there was almost a mess of cum, and from the looks of it, he was proud.

you heard him speak quietly, "pobrecita."

you didn't know what to tell alex. you didn't know how to tell him...

he was going to be really mad that you were doing something you weren't supposed to do with his friend.

you felt guilty and ashamed... you knew it was going to eat you alive if you hid this from him.

you shouldn't have done this to begin with...

as the three of you hung out together,, you were the only one feeling tensed. you didn't know that ruben and alex didn't feel the way you do.

it was a surprise, when alexis asked you if you liked how ruben did you.

saying yes felt wrong, but...

"if you did, when are the three of us doing it?" alexis asked.

____________

help i dunno what to tag ;-;

#quackity x reader #quackity x y/n #quackity x you #quackity drabble #quackity smut #quackity fanfic #rubius x reader

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garthofshayeris · 11 months ago

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"you're always so negative, what kind of Aquaman story would you NOT complain about?" so glad you asked. I have some thoughts, DC, on how to make things fun again. You can reboot everything at any time and I will only be a lil mad if you don't let me write it.

To begin, the info below would cover multiple arcs: I think too many Aquaman comics just start out putting him in Atlantis, but not this one. The journey to Atlantis will take some time, giving the reader the opportunity to know Arthur before he's a king and get the lay of the land (extra joke) underwater.

Let's start with Arthur. We're doing a little combo action here: Arthur is fully Atlantean, abandoned by a baby but found by a pod of dolphins. Since he's a telepath, and for Divine Plot Reasons, the animals know he is someone of great importance. However, he very quickly becomes too much for them to handle. They're just dolphins, after all. The dolphins, led by the iconic Porm, bring him to a lighthouse when he's around 5ish. There, he is discovered by Thomas Curry.

Tom Curry is no dummy. He knows this kid Is Not Human, but he also knows that revealing him as a non-human will just get the kid sent to some unknown lab to be experimented on. So he raises the kid as if he's a human and tries to keep him out of the water at all times.

Obviously, this doesn't work. Arthur is drawn to the ocean, and the dolphins who keep visiting him. There’s no hope in keeping him from the water. Tom doesn't reveal that Arthur is non-human, but he does coach him on never revealing any of his powers to people. Arthur becomes a local hero, mostly because he's often out swimming or on the fishing boat and ends up saving people.

Tom gets sick and, fearing he will die and leave Arthur unprepared for the world (he's in his 20s but just chills at home) he explains Arthur's origins and how Arthur is not his biological son, but a creature from the oceans.

Arthur always assumed he was a meta human; he knows now that he's not human at all. Arthur wants to learn about his people and Tom is like "we have no idea if they're dangerous, we have no idea why you were left here" and Arthur is like "how bad can they be?"

Arthur leaves home and tries to find Atlantis. This is no easy feat, considering he has no idea where to start. The dolphin pod is able to give him general directions to where they think they found him, but he still doesn't end up anywhere near a sunken city. Eventually, he finds the ruins of some kind of settlement, a cave...and a kid.

The kid is speaking a language that Arthur doesn't understand, but they quickly realize they are both telepaths! Slowly they learn to communicate; the kid will say something out loud and then convey the same message telepathically, and Arthur will do the same while responding in English. They slowly figure out how to speak each other's language, but the kid has a very limited vocabulary of his native tongue. However, he manages to explain some things:

The cave they are in used to be full of people, rejects from Atlantis for some reason or another; criminals, "mutants", etc. Atlanteans have a tendency to abandon their kids to die of exposure but people can be kicked out for any reason. This kid was the last baby they found, and were raising him as a group until Something Happened. They were attacked and all the adults died; he only survived by being hidden and has been alone in the years that followed the attack.

Here's the thing: the kid thinks his name is Baby, because that's what he was referred to as (aka "the baby") before everyone was killed. Arthur is convinced that the kid must have parents who are grieving him in Atlantis, and that they have a name for him. So he doesn't want to assign a name that's wrong, but he can't just call him Baby. So he starts using similar names, Baby Shark, Minnow, Tadpole, etc. as nicknames.

So! Arthur is convinced that he needs to find Atlantis and figure out who he is. The kid is like I was always told to avoid going there also they killed everyone, but I like your energy. Also you are my dad now. The kid doesn't know where Atlantis is, but he has seen some people like them nearby. So they start venturing off to find other Atlanteans.

Eventually, they discover an Atlantean man out in the wild, doing some kind of research. Arthur swims right up to him to introduce himself. The man is absolutely shocked to see Arthur (and the kid, who followed behind) and introduces himself as Vulko. Vulko works for the king as a scientist and advisor, but honestly hates that guy. The king is a real dick and only king because of marriage, not royal lineage. He believes the ocean is dying and they need to reveal themselves to the surface to save their home. Arthur is like omg no way, I'm FROM there can you introduce me to the king I can defend your case! :3 I'm somewhat of a folk hero on land, you know...

Vulko says no, and that Arthur and the kid are "throw backs" or undesirables in Atlantis. The people of Atlantis will not take kindly to someone like Arthur, but also implies that Arthur SHOULD try to win their affection because he likes his style. They decide to do that by "saving the ocean" they start taking on bigger, badder threats. Vulko provides them with some outdated Atlantean armor that he steals from the palace (orange for Arthur, red for the kid) and they begin to take on pirates, monsters, etc. They are not only gaining notoriety on land, but in the sea as well. Scouts from Atlantis are reporting back about a duo of mysterious Atlanteans taking out threats the king had been too cowardly to take on. They take on celebrity status.

Along the way they find Mera. She has fled her home dimension (unrelated to Atlantis at all, she's literally not from their world) who needs a place to crash. Arthur and Garth invite her to stay with them, in that destroyed settlement turned bachelor pad, and explain their plan to get into Atlantis. Mera, a princess, has the tact and manners that the others lack and joins the team.

Meanwhile, Vulko is stoking the rumor mill, trying to put in a good word for Aquaman and Aqualad, and he starts digging around for records of them. Vulko finds no record of Arthur's birth, and can only find ONE instance of a boy being born within the approximate age of the kid; the boy was named Garth and abandoned as an infant. There is no official record of him, or his parents (which is customary) and it appears this was done intentionally, and that information was destroyed. He only learns about this from talking to people who used to work in the palace. Vulko starts to suspect there is more to the story and also tries to dig into any of info on about Arthur…

And eventually he finds it; everyone knows the late queen had a son named Orm, but what they DON’T know is that she had a son before him with an unknown father. The people believe this child died during childbirth but Vulko finds a single woman who was around for his birth (the others involved have “mysteriously died”) who can confirm that the child was born, and born with blonde hair. While the queen rested, the king took the child out of Atlantis to leave him to die. The queen was told her child died shortly after childbirth but she never truly believed this. The queen bore a second son, Orm, and took her own life when Orm was a child.

So, why is the king so adamant about killing off the outsiders? Although he believed the baby had died, an oracle told him that the boy lives and would dethrone him (he’s VERY superstitious). He has been sending out soldiers to kill anyone harboring throwbacks and he has been training his son, Orm, to be a great fighter so he can defend his father and anyone who might claim the throne. He’s paranoid that the child he tried to dispose of will return and dethrone him.

So anyway. Arthur returns to Atlantis to try and convince the king to let him on as an advisor to the surface world. The king recognizes the blonde hair immediately but cannot react and give himself away. He tries to remove the squad by virtue of them being throwbacks but the people LOVE Aquaman and Aqualad, they are so excited about their visit that to avoid an uprising they are allowed to stay as guests.

They meet prince Orm during their stay. He's a little standoffish and not at all happy to see throw backs trying to get into the palace; his father had assured him that they were all dead, that throwbacks cannot survive into adulthood.

In an attempt to kill them off/make them leave and lose favor with Atlantis, the king starts making up increasingly dangerous tasks they must complete (like the trials of Hercules tbh) but of course Arthur is absolutely killing it! He’s having a great time and thinks this is very normal, but Mera, who is unfamiliar with Atlantis but very familiar with royal schemes, decides that something fishy (extra joke) is going on. She and Vulko investigate the events surrounding the queen’s suicide.

One of the “challenges” is for Arthur to fight Orm in a public arena. Orm gets his ass beat but Arthur, who had taken a liking to Orm, let’s him get a few punches in so he’s not embarrassed. Even after the fight he’s acting really buddy-buddy with him. Orm is confused and angry at being public ally defeated, but cannot help but think that Arthur is a really nice dude.

Once again, I’m imagining this taking a long time. It’s part monster fighting, part investigation, part hijinks in a new location, etc. They leave Atlantis occasionally to take on land-threats and visit Arthur's father. FINALLY, though, Mera figured it out; the queen didn’t kill herself. This is already long so I'm just going to say that she confronted her husband and he killed her to secure Orm's place on the throne.

The king has another very public venue in which to try to embarrass Aquaman. For example, having him fight some giant monster. But Arthur doesn’t like to kill innocent animals and he uses his telepathy to calm the beast down. Telepathy is not a common ability (and until now nobody had seen Arthur use it) but it’s also a mythical sign of the divine right of royalty in Atlantis. Only kings of yore have shown the ability, and even the late queen couldn’t manifest it. So ofc the king accuses Arthur of being some kind of freak or faking it. That’s when Mera, Garth, and Vulko come on the scene with their receipts: they’ve pieced together the king’s attempted murder of the baby, that Arthur is rightful heir to the throne, and that the king murdered the queen. The king initially claims they’re lying, but then they pull out the receipts and display them to the entire crowd. Enraged, he tries to kill Arthur and another fight ensues. Arthur manages to get the king pinned but refuses to kill him. The king takes this opportunity to break out from under the trident and flees the city. although soldiers pursue him it seems that he has completely disappeared. There is a bounty out for him, leaving the possibility of him returning as a major threat still in the air (extra joke).

Arthur is named king, as the oldest heir to the throne, to his absolute bewilderment. Orm is absolutely furious, as he thinks Arthur only came there to steal the throne from him, just like his father said he would. Arthur tries to explain that it wasn’t his intention, but Orm storms off and hides away in a wing of the castle. The squad lets him stay, but there’s animosity for sure.

Now that he is no longer in celebrity status, the people begin to poke holes in their love of the group; they did not have the full story (of them being throw backs) and now they're a bit suspicious about Garth and Mera, specifically (they don't realize she's not Atlantean, though you would think the flipper feet would give it away...) and there are some who loved the old king and want him back on the throne (conspiracy theorists essentially) Now that they aren't essentially there on vacation, they begin to notice how isolating it is in Altantis...and then we begin the more introspective plot lines, talking about feeling like an outsider and what it means to fit in!

Now Arthur has a new job, a reputation as a hero, and no idea what to do next!

Character's main traits/inspiration

Arthur: did NOT anticipate finding out he was a long lost king, he just wanted to learn about Atlantis! He's trying to balance being a hero, which he likes, being an adventurer, which he loves, and being a king which is...fine, I guess. This version will lean more into his Silver Age personality, which is my favorite, where he seems a little confused but excited about everything. Rather than try to sweep all the "uncool" things under the rug like some versions of Aquaman do, he's so genuine about his life that it's difficult to make fun of him. He is not actually that great at being a king, so luckily he has a lot of friends to help him.

Garth: he follows Arthur around like a lost puppy and is SO happy to be living in a place with real walls and a real bed. However, he still wants to know more about his parents and why records of him were destroyed... We are going back to the classic sidekick genre with him, something DC seems afraid to do. If DC also wanted to have the Titans, or the rest of the fab five be older, I could see him being significantly younger than the others but still part of the "first wave" of sidekicks so they're lumped together anyway. Like the Silver/Bronze age, he could visibly age during the run of the comic and be in his teenage years for any Titans-related plots DC wanted to run. I would be keeping his lost prince backstory, but that wouldn't come up for a very long time. I like the idea of having him age throughout the series, I think that's a very fun aspect of comics that has been lost. He would keep his post-crisis origins, but not learn about them for quite some time.

Mera: She never told Arthur the real reason she was exiled, and to be fair he didn't ask. She's excited to be in the political world of Atlantis and make changes for the better, something she couldn't do back home... I like the idea of Mera being from another world altogether, I think it adds to the overall theme of them being outsiders. She will be a combination of her very domestic original version and the feisty modern Mera. Since Mera doesn't have much of a personality usually (sorry girl) I'm going to make her very studious and politically minded. She LOVES politics and is passionate about making changes to help the everyday Atlanteans. She’s also worried about being sent back to her home dimension, so she tries to keep everyone pleased with her.

Vulko: the only one of the group who understands Atlantean customs. He is always so, so tired of shenanigans... Vulko is going to be a bit like Merlin, an advisor and advocate for Arthur taking the throne. and yes he WILL be old and he WILL be fat.

Orm: royally (extra joke) pissed about losing the throne, but conflicted about his father being Very Evil and hiding the existence of his brother/killing his mom. He mostly sulks and keeps to himself, making it unclear if he is friend or foe... I LOVE his Silver Age jealousy, but DC wants them to be related by their mother and I don't want to fight them on that. I actually prefer when Orm is at least partially human, but I don’t think I can have my cake and eat it too with the origins here, so he’s the biggest compromise tbh. I think Orm could be a shifty character, not outright evil but clearly angry about how things are going so he causes problems on purpose. But there's still the chance that he might sway to either side...

Manta: Honestly, he's the hardest one to introduce into the fray because he only recently started getting actual reasons to have beef with Arthur. Which I respect. Since Tom is going to be alive (for now) I think having Manta slowly develop a beef with Arthur that all comes to head by killing Arthur's father could be interesting. Or maybe Tom gets to live, and Manta does something equally terrible. It's unclear in my mind tbh. So! Manta is trying to develop his empire of piracy and Arthur, trying to win over the people of land and sea, starts really going after him. He sinks every single one of Manta's subs, thwarts every single plan, and is ruining Manta's reputation. He HATES Aquaman, and unfortunately Aquaman doesn't really know who he is or realize he's made an enemy... he would show up as a big threat in later comics, after Arthur has established himself in Atlantis

The former king: this could be Orvax, who was introduced in N52, but honestly if the writer wanted to make a new OC I wouldn’t mind. Orvax doesn’t have much in ways of background of personality because he only exists in flashbacks, but I know how sucky it is to just use the same name for a totally different character (looking at you, rebirth Garth!) so I’m just going to call him King for now. It would be interesting if he was corrupted like Orm in previous volumes into making a deal with an entity in exchange for power…perhaps even serving as a patron for Orm if he shifts to the dark side.

So. That's a quick rendition of my ideal Aquaman reboot. I think it s a fun combo of all the elements I've liked over the years without simply be a rehashing of the stories. Thoughts, opinions. etc?

#aquaman meta

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millylotus · 2 years ago

Text

I See All of You & You Are Magnificent

Monster x Monster

When Duke and Danny first met they could see through eachothers glamor and were immediately taken by each other's true form. Both of their forms are inconceivable to most people, and they both have a deep want to be known and loved for their true selves.

Duke’s form is very bright, the light he generates is blinding, under it he is like a bird, the Grey Crowned Crane to be specific. But he doesn’t really look like one, kind of like those angels with a bunch of eyes and wings, he’s got a bird neck/head and a pair of his wings are connected to his arms like bat wings. The golden rings of eyes are around his head, torso and legs. He’s got a giant pair of wings on his back and a set on his heels. His bird head and his human head exist at the same time kinda like those holographic drawings where you see it depending on how you look at it.

Danny is kinda like a black hole he produces no light but a slight rim of light going into him. Under all of that he’s got long thin and sharp limbs. His suit looks like it’s just a pattern on his skin, and the symbol has kinda faded away. He's got these big antlers on his head and his mouth is filled with fangs, to the point where it doesn’t seem like he should be able to close his mouth. His hands are sharp and slaw like, and his eyes blink sideways. His tongue is uncomfortably long.

They both look disturbingly uncanny without their glamorous, and some of their true form traits can peek through. Like Duke’s extra eyes being able to see the future are visible over where the rings would be. Or Danny’s fangs and claws accidentally ripping into things.

DUKE

No you don’t understand he sees me and I can see him and he’s perfect. I’m not all that human and I’ve never been and when Danny looks at me he doesn’t just see some random human boy he sees me. He sees the blinding light of my existence and he can perceive me and he loves me. And I love him, in all his eldritch horror he is perfect to me and I love him. Because he’s him and he understands me to my core. I love him.

DANNY

It’s just- he just gets me. He can see me for me and he always has. And Jazz the first time Duke looked at me he seemed so enamored by me, so taken by me, and he saw me for me every time he saw me. He wants me even though I’m an ugly and horrific being. And I love him even though he deserves so much more than me. He is so bright and beautiful and he is the sun and I love him.

When Gnomon and Duke first fought the light bomb went off and the glamor that Elaine had put over Duke was forcefully removed by the explosion. Bruce and Duke were terrified and Gnomon took his chance to make a deal with Duke. Duke comes to the archives with him and learns how to make his own glamor and adapt to his true form.

Duke is able to convince him to just bring the proper information to Gotham so he doesn’t have to leave. Bruce offores up Wayne Manor as a place where Duke could learn.

It takes a couple of months and Gnomon gets a bit of a redemption arc in that time, but he is unable to properly heal Elaine and Doug.

Now Duke can make his own glamor and knows some things about Gnomon’s side of the family. He’s gone back to living a relatively normal life if you don’t count the vigilante and ethereal being stuff.

Duke being born of an archivist and being of light is kind of weird. He speaks/writes all languages and knows far too much. While also being able to manipulate light and the lack of light, along with seeing where all light was/is/will be. Combined those last two abilities give him future visions, which are underdeveloped because of his age and inexperience.

The Batfam’s reaction to Duke not being a regular meta and actually being a high caliber ethereal being was better than it could have been. They all had already gotten close to Duke and were accepting of his weaker powers, but the knowledge that Duke was so much more than they could ever be was daunting.

Duke was scared that they may never want him back, Cass was the first to notice Duke shrinking into himself and she quickly made sure the others knew how their less than stellar reactions. They all go out of their way to make sure Duke knows he’s loved even though he’s different. Duke really appreciates their new attitude.

When Duke is feeding into his archivist habits he spends his time in the Wayne Library, letting some of his inhuman traits come through.

Duke keeps going to Middletown South with Izzy, Troy, Dre & Riko, and lives between his cousin Jay’s home and Wayne Manor.

---

As Danny gets older as a ghost his ghostly form becomes more and eldritch, he’s been instinctively making a secondary glamor to go over his ghostly form so nobody goes mad because of it. When he defeats Pariah, Clockwork and Frostbite take him aside and explain that his true form needs to start dropping the glamor more and learn how to take care of himself in that aspect.

So Danny spends the rest of Sophomore year figuring out himself and what it means to be him, as both a person and a ghost. Over this time he sets up some truces with the other ghosts so he doesn't have to stress every second.

Before Danny’s Junior year the Fenton parents decided to move to Gotham because of all the spooky shit that happens over there. Jazz is already living there for college and even though Danny is against it they end up dragging him to Jersey.

Danny is enrolled in Middletown South, which is thankfully similar enough to Casper High that Danny doesn’t have too much of a culture shock.

DUKE

I’d noticed a sort of void that whole day really, I hadn’t thought much of them until they started looking my way.

And when I took a peak at them and saw them for their truth, I could barely even breath.

He’s magnificent, gorgeous, in an eldritch way that just fits him. His antlers were bigger than the regular kid, spiraling out of control. His claws are so sharp I swear they could cut through space itself.

And he was looking at me, he saw me.

DANNY

It was like seeing a bright light right on your peripherals. I just had to look over, see what I couldn’t quite see.

He was so painfully bright I had to blink a couple dozen times before I could see him properly.

He’s magnificent, wonderful, ethereal even. His largest wings seemed to lay all around him, his eyes glancing this way and that way.

Until they settled on me and saw me.

Duke and Danny first say to each other on the first day of school, second period math class. They’d both been able to feel each other's presence, but neither went out of their way to really look at each other until then.

Danny was the first to take a peak, what with Duke being a literal beacon of light he wasn’t easy to ignore. Duke saw him second, noticing the staring and truly focused on Danny and saw him. They both fell for each other right then and there.

Neither really realized the whole love thing and just wanted to get to know each other. Duke ends up inviting Danny to come and sit with him and his friends for lunch. Izzy, and Dre catch on quickly to Duke’s semi crush on Danny, and get Troy and Riko in on the whole setting the two up. They exchanged numbers and Danny agrees to meet with them again tomorrow. Btws Dax goes to another school.

When the Fentons moved to Gotham they did so to try and learn more about the Gotham specific ghosts they think exist there. They ended up choosing Crime Alley “Park Row” as a place to stay in because of the higher levels of ectoplasm and the Red Hood being known to be kinda ghostly. Jack and Maddie spend most of the first month they’re in Gotham setting up shop in the basement of the building they’ve moved into.

Jazz and Danny are basically living out of Jazz’s dorm at Gotham University. Jazz’s roommate hasn’t moved in yet so the two get the place to themselves. Danny doesn’t want to listen to their parents prepare for their ghost hunting bullshit. And Jazz would much rather have her brother around instead of being alone for the two weeks before college.

Danny isn’t doing the whole Phantom thing anymore cause 1) isn't really needed with all the heroes in Gotham, 1.5) he doesn’t want to encroach on the bat’s terf, 2) he really needs this break, and 3) it’s better if his parents assume Phantom didn’t follow them all the way to Jersey.

Jack and Maddie do stake outs after they’re ready, at this point it’s a week into the school year. They pick up a very weak ectoplasmic signature from Jason, but he’s similar to Vlad in intensity so they aren’t sure if he’s dead or if he got infected by some pure ectoplasm. They run after him at one point, but then Jason shoots at them with very real guns and they decide to just back off for now.

As the weeks go by Danny gets closer to the WR group, he and Riko have third and fourth period, Izzy and him share sixth period with Duke, and Troy and Dre have first period together with Danny. Danny doesn’t really talk much about his family besides his sister going to GU and his parents deciding to move to Gotham as well because it had better opportunities for their work.

One day after school, when Danny’s walking to Jazz’s place, Danny almost gets mugged and Duke comes down and saves him. They recognize each other on sight and just kinda stare, before Danny says something stupid like, “I knew you were an angel the moment I saw you, just didn’t think you’d be the guardian type.” Then Duke laughs and says something equally dumb like, “Well the most lovely of beings always deserve a guardian angel don’t they?”

Of course then Danny has to swear he’ll keep the whole Duke is Signal thing. This is when the two start actually flirting with each other, and like falling for eachother.

After their retreat from Red Hood, the Fentons decide to go after a new vigilante, Black Bat. Because obviously if nobody can ever sense, hear, or really see them, then they have to be a ghost.

Cass being Cass is basically impossible to track, but she has enough ectoplasm in her system that they get small pings from her. Eventually Maddie and Jack corner Cass, she mainly lets them do so out of curiosity. They tried to attack or pin her down, but Cass just led them on a wild goose chase across Gotham.

They lose her, and end up just deciding to head back home, it’s dawn and Signal is still out on the town. Jack and Maddie get a weird alert, and follow it to him. They see Signal using his powers a little. Because Duke isn’t really a ghost he ticks off the Fentons’ general supernatural being detector. Now the Fentons have someone else to hunt down.

Duke isn’t a ghost or ectoplasmic being, he’s more of a different thing. A hybrid between the Ichor Beings of Light[Gnomon], and the Archivists[Elaine] who are a branch species from the Ichor Beings. Elaine was an Archivist of Light before she gave up that power running away from Gnomon. So the Fenton tech doesn’t affect him.

Jason was the first to mention the Fentons hunting him down, Cass said later that they had started tailing her, and when they actually kept up with her the rest of the family got a tad curious. Then a month in the school year they shot at Signal in broad daylight. Now everybody is worried, the shot didn’t do much besides push Duke back, kinda like a bb gun.

Duke immediately up and dipped because he was not about to deal with that, but tagged the Fentons with a tracker/bug to find out who they are. Duke does some digging into the Fentons with Cass and Jason, when they find out about Danny and Jazz, Duke is stunned, scared a little even.

Duke ends up telling the rest of the Batfam about Danny and that he knows about the whole Duke is Signal thing. Of course they all can tell that Duke is crushing hard on the eldritch son of two mad scientists. Bruce’s first reaction is holy shit please god why. Because all his children end up with people that he knows probably aren't the best idea. Cass asks him if Danny can come over for a visit [interrogation]. Duke agrees to ask Danny to come round, but as long as the bats promise not to overwhelm him.

Because the W Robins already know about the whole bat thing it's just Danny who's kind of out of the loop.

At this point Duke and Danny kinda got a situationship going on, they're not really dating but they're kinda also flirting with each other. It's basically a matter of time until they get together at this point, so getting Danny to agree to come over to Wayne manor was relatively easy.

The next day over the phone Duke tells Danny that his parents shot at him while Duke was Signal, and Danny is so embarrassed and concerned. He apologizes for his parents and what they did. Duke convinces Danny to come over to his foster family's place, the batfamily, so they could talk about it more, and what the colony could do to prevent the Fentons from becoming a problem.

Danny agrees to come over, the next day around dawn near the end of Signal’s patrol, Duke takes his bike and goes to pick up Danny and drive him to the batcave through the underground tunnels.

Danny spends the first few minutes in the batcave just ogling all the new things, then the bats go out of their way to scare the shit out of him before they get the meeting underway.

Danny explains that his parents came to Gotham to investigate the ectoplasm levels and the stories about the bats being inhuman. They went after Red Hood and Black Bat because they have enough levels of ectoplasm to be traced with Fenton tech.

After Danny agrees to help them bypass the sensors, Bruce asks about Danny’s own inhuman nature he gets a bit clammy about it, but explains that he was basically conceived, born and raised in a home with high levels of ectoplasm floating around, it just took one accident to really strip him of his humanity fully.

Duke drives Danny home a little after that, they end up talking outside Jazz’s dorm building, a minor confession occurs but they’re both stupid and don’t realize what happened. Jazz immediately teases Danny about him hanging out with Signal, Danny denies that anything is happening between them.

Okay so Duke and Danny, when they first meet each other it was more in the sense of “Wow they are so cool and pretty I wanna be their friend”. Then when they meet as Signal and Danny it’s kinda like “Holy heck did not know you were so beautiful/hot”. Now they’re kinda flirty with each other, but neither think that the other actually likes them.

So it’s this dumb will they won't they kinda think, and everyone around them is so done with them about it.

DEADLIGHTS MASTERPOST, GENERAL NOTES, MEMES, AO3

#millywrites #dc x dp #dp x dc #dp x dc fanfic #danny x duke #duke x danny #danny fenton #duke thomas #dc #batman #signal #the signal #danny phantom #crossover #crossover ship #eldritch danny #ethereal duke

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thesparklingwriter · 1 year ago

Text

millenia precede us

“Let’s play a game,” You say. “Whoever finds the other first wins a prize.”

tags: reincarnation au, fem!reader, reader is part adeptus, inspired by this ask from aine

word count: 3k (apologies for this monster of a fic)

ao3 link | taglist | masterlist | next

Zhongli dreams of you again. For the first time in centuries, he sees your face, your smile, your laugh. The dreams had first started when he was young—or young by archon standards. He’d drifted off to sleep one night, and woke up entirely occupied by the face of someone he’d never met before, by the smell of something he was sure he’d never smelt in his lifetime.

He’d found comfort in seeing you—in listening to you talk in a language he didn’t yet understand, wearing clothes he hadn’t seen before. You’d come for a few years, and then disappear, only to reappear later, wearing something different, speaking in a different language. Your smile never seemed to change.

The two of you could never truly communicate either—your shared dreamscape was simple, a park in the height of autumn, a small picnic blanket on the floor. There, you’d snack on whatever was laid out on the blanket and try your bests to communicate however you could. Most times, however, you’d cuddle up to each other and sit in silence, watching the way the landscape changed.

He’d always known that you’d come back. He hoped that you’d come back. But you’d been gone for so long that he began to fear that your reincarnation cycle had ended, that he’d never get to meet you in real life.

“Hello,” you smile. Zhongli can barely reply to you—hes so stunned that he can understand you, that he can recognise the clothes you’re wearing and the floral scent you always carried with you. Glaze lilies. That’s what it was. “First time here?” You ask kindly. Zhongli stares at you before clearing his throat.

“No.” he replies. You seem confused, but sit yourself down on the blanket and run your hands over the copper-coloured silk. “I’ve met you a few times.” He says, lowering himself to sit beside you.

“A few times?” You say quietly. “I recognise your voice, the way you smell, but not your face. Is that how this is supposed to be?”

Zhongli is ashamed to admit that he doesn’t know. As far as he knows, he was the first to experience anything like this, and slowly others began to too, until it became commonplace for people across Teyvat. Something he or the other archons did must have made this happen, but none of them had any clue what it could be.

“I’m not sure,” Zhongli replies, shifting himself so that he’s not so close to you, for fear of making you uncomfortable. You notice him shifting away and close the gap yourself, resting your head against his shoulder the way you did when you first met all those centuries ago. “Not much is known about the dreamscapes.” he says.

“How long have you been able to visit?” You ask, looking up at him.

Zhongli is torn between lying, or gracing you with the truth. “A number of years,” He says finally and you look at him with wide eyes.

“How much older than me are you?” You ask. Zhongli looks at you, again torn as to what he should say. The truth is always better, especially in situations like this, but the truth may also be too much to handle.

“I’m an adeptus,” he decides this is a better course of action. “I’m older than I appear.” You don’t seem as surprised by this as he expected—in fact, you don’t seem to have a problem with it at all.

“My mum’s an adeptus, this isn’t new to me.” You smile. “Anyway, what’s your name?”

“Zhongli,” He says. You say his name under your breath, resting the words on your tongue. Zhongli looks at you in wonder, at the way you take this all in your stride. You ask him questions and he responds, and you don't seem to miss a beat. He reckons he could tell you everything, the whole truth, and you probably wouldn't even flinch.

It’s strange to you, the way he already seems so comfortable. How long has he truly known you for? And how is that even possible? But even despite your thoughts, you know Teyvat is place a where the most random things can happen, and you know you won’t find the answer you seek without asking him. But you'd like to enjoy his presence, so you decide to pack it in for the time being. “You don’t have any questions for me?” You ask him, tilting your head slightly.

“Not necessarily, no.” He smiles. “I’ve learned to know you fairly well, though you might not remember our past encounters.”

“That’s sweet,” you reply, sitting up. You sigh as the beautiful landscape begins to fade and you sense yourself waking up. How unfair, you think to yourself. It feels like I've barely had five minutes with him. “I’ve gotta go, but I’ll be looking out for you when I’m out. Bye, Zhongli.”

Zhongli stays seated once you leave, staring out into the middle distance. He sighs. He never got your name.

You sit up in bed, head pounding. It’s still pitch black outside, but your alarm continues to ring incessantly as you pull yourself out of bed and get ready for a day at the office. A new publishing company has begun shipping its books to Liyue and it’s your job to read through as many of them as you can and provide thorough and honest reviews. The only problem with this is that they aren’t really the kind of books you usually read. If anything, they’re the exact opposite of the Liyuean fiction you’re used to reviewing.

As you read, your mind drifts to Zhongli, the way he’d looked at you as if you were coming home to him, as if you were familiar. And it scares you—the fact that somewhere in the back of your mind, you know you know him, but can't place your finger on it. A stranger shouldn't feel familiar.

“Everything going okay?” Your coworker lets herself into your office, smiling brightly. “I heard you got lumped with the Inazuman erotica. How’s that going?”

You sigh, placing the book down. It’s not like you were truly going to get to the end of it anyway, with your mind so focused on the way Zhongli smiled at you with such fondness.

“Oh, it’s going, alright,” You sigh, leaning back in your seat. “I just never know what to expect next, if I’m honest. Did you know there’s a whole book that’s just about a dragon?”

“Dragon…erotica?” Your coworker asks, glancing dangerously at the pile of books on your desk.

“Sorry, half dragon, half-qilin. I should be more specific.” You run your hands through your hair. “I’ve been avoiding that one like the plague.”

“Isn’t your deadline in like three weeks?”

“Don’t remind me.” You say, standing up to shoo them out of your office. “It will be the last thing I read. A final hurrah of sorts. Now get out.”

Over the next few days, finishing work for the day is a much more exciting event than it usually is. You know that the minute you hit the hay, Zhongli is likely going to be there. He goes to bed early so it seems like he’s always waiting for you in his shared dreamscape.

“You know,” You say, resting your head on his shoulder. A lake suddenly appeared in the dreamscape and you’ve taken to watching the koi as they dance around each other in the glistening water. “Why don’t you just tell me where to find you? Make this easier on both of us.”

Zhongli chuckles. “I could do that, yes. But it would be rude of me to send you on a wild goose chase across Liyue. It would be easier if you just told me where to find you.”

“As if.” You scoff, getting up to dip your hands in the lake and feel the fish brush past you. You’d named them over the last few days: Ai for the fish with heart-shaped scales, Lian for the fish who was easily startled, and Gan for the fish that seemed to protect it. “Where’s the fun in that?”

“I’m sure you can identify the hypocrisy in your own statement.” Zhongli says.

“Let’s play a game,” You say. “Whoever finds the other first wins a prize.”

“And that prize is…?”

“A secret. What do you say, Zhongli? Up for it?”

Zhongli looks at you in awe and mild frustration. He always knew that you enjoyed problem-solving and a good challenge, which was clear by the way you used to try and find ways to communicate with him all those years ago, but he never expected this. Either way, he nods, listens dutifully to your rules (three clues each and no cheating by asking for each other by name) and agrees to your terms. That is, not that you gave him much of a choice in the matter.

And thus the game begins. The three clues you give him are mean—you work ‘normal’ hours, you like to read, and you spend a lot of time near the harbour. It doesn’t really narrow down much for him, but he humours you anyway, giving you his three clues in return. Arguably, his are even worse than yours—they’re riddles that seemed to have no connection to him whatsoever. As you try to accuse him of unfair play, you feel yourself stirring awake, and instead swear you’ll call him out on it on a later date.

Of course, you didn’t expect that you’d be seeing him so little over the coming weeks.

As your deadline pulls closer and you begin to pull more all-nighters to try and finish reviewing all the books that have been sent to you, you spend so little time sleeping that by the time you’re deep enough in sleep to reach the dreamscape, your alarm goes off and you’re dragged back into the real world.

“Mr Zhongli, are you alright?” After a week of watching Zhongli descend more and more into a worrying state, Hu Tao realises that she has to speak up. “You haven't been yourself lately. Do you have too much work?”

“I’m quite alright. I’m simply concerned for an acquaintance of mine.” Zhongli says, snapping out of his daze, and swiping imaginary dust off his blazer. “It’s not something to worry yourself about.”

Hutao dutifully ignores the last past of his sentence, seating herself on the other side of his desk. His office is always spotless, ready for a customer to come in at any time. That being said, he seems to get more menial questions from history buffs than paying patrons.

“Now, Mr Zhongli. I’m going to give this to you straight. You’re a loner. And I’m very curious as to where this friend has spawned from. So talk.”

Zhongli chuckles. It’s not the first time he’s been told that he essentially has no friends, for it was improbable that his adepti friends would be open to meeting in the harbour. “She is an old friend.” Zhongli says.

“‘She’?” Hutao gasps, jumping up from her seat. “Oh, this is great. You have a crush on her, don’t you? This is why you’ve been in such an odd mood recently.”

“I really do dislike you sometimes,” Zhongli says quietly, as Hutao begins her incessant teasing. “It is difficult to explain, so please do not ask that of me.”

“Fine, fine.” She returns to the seat. “Well, let’s go find her. Then you can stop being worried, and I can see her for myself.”

“That may prove difficult.” Zhongli says, rising from his desk. “But I suppose the task will be easier with your help.”

You sneeze lightly as you finish the review of your penultimate book. You’re running on two hours of sleep, three coffees, and the hope that when this is done, you can finally get to finding Zhongli again. No matter how much pay your boss offers you, you won’t accept a job like this again. No way.

You glance at the final book with a glare. Why someone decided to write erotica about the archon of a nation they didn’t even belong to was beyond you. Furthermore, you really didn't feel like trudging through thousands of misconceptions, concessions in knowledge of Liyue’s customs, and of course the blatant blasphemy. And you definitely aren’t going to do it in this office.

Taking the book and a newfound sense of dread, you walk out of the office, tell the receptionist that you’re going to find somewhere nice to read the book and find yourself strolling along Liyue Harbour in search of a nice bench. You haven’t had the time to walk around like this since you started your job a year ago, and it’s crazy how much things have changed. You look around some of the stalls before asking one of the stall owners whether they know any relaxing places to sit and read.

“A koi fish pond has just been installed. Apparently it’s a symbol of friendship between Inazuma and Liyue.” She says to you. “It’s just along there, you can’t miss it.”

You thank her gratefully, following her directions before arriving there. It looks exactly like the one in your shared dreamscape, shiny silver rocks around the border and clear teal water. Even the fish look the same, and you kneel down at the pond to look at them, one jumps out of the water, almost to greet you.

“Hello, Ai,” you say softly. “I have no food for you today.” The fish jumps back into the water, disappointed by the lack of food, and you rise to your feet, getting comfortable on the opposite bench to read the book. Sitting here like this makes you miss Zhongli. With your sleep schedule being so messed up the past few weeks, you never truly get to see him anymore. This is the closest you’ve felt to him in days. And maybe it’s your own fault for suggesting you play that silly game, maybe it’s your own fault for being afraid of what would happen if you finally met, but you’re tired of the torture. Next time you catch him in the dreamscape, you’re going to tell him how to find you.

The sun beats down on you as you read, and paired with the caffeine that’s slowly draining out of your system, you slowly feel your eyes start to close. It’s not the book’s fault—it’s certainly not bad as you expected, but when you’re this tired, there’s nothing you can do to stop it.

“We should start at koi fish pond,” Hutao says excitedly, as she drags Zhongli along the harbour.

“Why?”

“It’s new. I’m sure it would have garnered her interest.” She says. “And I've never had a chance to look at it.”

“I should have known better than to allow you to recruit yourself to this task,” Zhongli says. “No matter, let us go and look at the pond.”

Zhongli remembers your love for the koi pond in the dreamscape, so whilst Hutao’s suggestion may have been selfish, it wasn’t the worst possible idea. He remembers the way you named the fish, fed them with care and watched them with unleashed curiosity and joy. Even if he didn’t find you there, he would be happy to just relish in the memories of you for a while.

“What’s all that commotion at the pond?” Hutao says. Zhongli snaps out of his daze, looking up at the Millelith crouching beside the bench, his spear flat against the floor. “Miss, are you alright?” The man asks, tentatively reaching out with the intention to shake her awake.

Hutao drags him closer to the scene, ignoring the way he seems to resist her.

“Miss, are you alright?” The Millelith repeats, and the woman he’s waking up sits up slowly. Zhongli can’t believe his eyes.

“Archons, I need to finish reading that book.” You mumble, thanking the man for waking you up with a slight smile, and almost instantly burying your face back into it.

Zhongli makes no effort to move towards you, overwhelmed by seeing you in real life for the first time. The version he sees of you in dreams doesn’t even do the real you justice—in real life, you’re so much brighter and striking. Your voice is something he could listen to for hours. You’re so perfect and he fears that if moves any closer, he’ll find that it’s all an illusion, a cruel trick his mind is playing on him.

“You are aware that it’s creepy to stare at people, yes?” Hutao says lightly. And Zhongli nods, slowly walking up to you, your name on his lips.

Your book falls to the floor as you look up at him. “Zhongli?” Your body moves before you mind can and you pull him into a hug. He’s real and he’s here and you can smell him and hold him and archons, he feels like home. You pull away to look at his face, to commit every single pore of his skin to memory. He’s real. “What are you doing here? How did you find me? What’s going on?”

Zhongli smiles. “You’re just as perfect as I remember.”

“Even when I’m falling asleep on a park bench?” You grin, running a hand over the back of his head.

“Especially when you’re asleep on a park bench.”

You roll your eyes, pulling him into a kiss. “You have terrible taste.”

“Perhaps,” He says, gently stroking your face with his cheek. “But in that instance, so do you.”

notes: hi this is a repost I just couldn’t bear watching it flop 😭😭 omg so i didn't mean to make this so long and i am absolutely confused as to how i got this many words. im so sure i blacked out somewhere in the middle and ended up with 3x the amount of words i usually aim for lmfaoo. anyway everyone thank aine cause if it wasn't for her you would not have this monster of a fic xoxo removing tags as I don’t wanna disturb y’all

(coloured @s couldn't be tagged)

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gojooooo · 9 months ago

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students au brainrot…....…...

— sukuna would already be too good he should skip to second year but gojo is like nuh uh you’re reckless and you need to learn the basics so i know you’ll be able to protect yourself out there, you can’t count on infinity like me hehe. sukuna is fuming

— sukuna comes from one of the most important families and he’s not exactly their preferred heir as he lacks in manners and obedience but being strong and a man grants him to still be considered part of the family despite him thinking a bit too much with his own head for their likings. which means in the jujutsu world everyone knows who he is and what their place is when in his presence

— him and yuuji just. bicker all day and everyone is like uh why is he talking back to #The ryomen sukuna gaaasp

— yuuji never cared. he’s unapologetically himself. he’s curious, stubborn, not afraid to say what he thinks

— the thing is, sukuna is never actually pissed off by it. sure, yuuji makes him sigh and roll his eyes twenty times a day, but he always allows it. he even looks forward to it. their banter keeps him entertained, he likes that there’s someone as stubborn as him who will keep that back and forth going

— he likes gojo, he really does, but his attitude and his stupid laugh are a nuisance. megumi is a great company during missions or quiet afternoons, but he always fixes sukuna with an unimpressed look when he starts being mean or way too energetic for megumi’s standards. nobara can match his feral energy at times and listening to her talk shit is fun and he gets along well with the seniors too, especially maki because he really respects her for not caring about what other people think and can always count on her to understand what it’s like to be an outcast in families like theirs but also to never say no to a sparring match, plus she’s a pleasant company like megumi as she doesn’t talk too much. but they all shut him down as well at some point, which at least it’s better than when people are afraid of him. but yuuji… yuuji is different. yuuji always has a playful smile and a quick comeback on the tip of his tongue ready for him. yuuji is pure fresh air.

— so yeah they’re always bickering like an old married couple, but for some reason they get along extremely well at random moments. and i mean extremely well. sukuna would be yelling at yuuji that he was too slow during their mission that day and then an hour later they’re cooking dinner side by side and shoujo bubbles is all that’s missing to make it perfect, nobara sits there flabbergasted because how are these the same guys that kick each other’s desk during class as if the whole room can’t hear it? the same sukuna who pushed yuuji out of the way just because he was standing in front of the shelf sukuna needed to pick his book from? the same yuuji who gives sukuna the finger everytime he turns around to leave? and now look at them. sukuna laughing at yuuji’s jokes while cutting veggies and telling him to be careful with the knife

— so nobara starts paying attention. she notices that yuuji is always in a good mood when sukuna is around even if he was pulling his cheek a minute before. she notices that sukuna always speaks highly of yuuji when he’s not there, like that one time when someone called yuuji soft and sukuna looked like he was about to rip their head off and quickly replied that yuuji is actually tough and never backs down from a fight no matter how dangerous

— and it looks like nobara started paying attention at the right time because she gets to see how their relationship slowly starts to change. yuuji’s tone is different when he’s talking to or about sukuna; it’s gentler, softer. he trains until late to make sure he’s never a step behind. his ears turn pink when it’s a sunny day and sukuna is sitting on the grass next to him, his sleeves rolled up and sweat dampening his shirt, laughing loud and open at maki sending megumi facedown on the ground. and sukuna, albeit subtly, starts touching and observing yuuji more. he sits closer when they’re on the bench during training, he lays his forearm on yuuji’s shoulder when they’re listening to ijichi’s explanations before a mission, he rests his hand on yuuji’s head when they’re all watching a movie together before sleep, absently running his fingers through his hair… and he stares at yuuji. a lot. he silently looks at him from afar, pensive, looking like he’s pondering the most important things in the universe and nobara wishes she could take a peek inside his brain and find out what’s stealing ryomen sukuna’s attention so intensely.

— so nobara looks for a partner in crime to witness it all with her but they all lift their eyebrows in disbelief because, ryomen sukuna, falling in love? ryomen love-is-worthless sukuna? the same sukuna that falls asleep and starts snoring when nobara chooses a romcom for movie night? there is no way. but she insist until she gets at least megumi to take her seriously and he has to admit it would explain many things such as why sukuna’s eye starts twitching whenever yuuji is hanging out with ozawa or why both their faces almost match the color of their hair when they’re around each other. (so even megumi has a little fun with it when he tells yuuji “ah, looks like you remember what sukuna’s favorite dish is but not mine” and watches him furiously list anything that pairs up with ginger until he gets it right – and he knows what he’s gonna find in his plate for dinner that night)

— then one day, yuuji protects sukuna from an attack he didn’t see coming. they’re often paired up together during missions as it slowly became clear that they work super well together (as long as they’re more focused on the mission than on each other) but sukuna is reckless and old habits die hard. it’s nothing serious and sukuna sits there staring at the door so intensely he might bore a hole into it until they inform him yuuji is awake. he stalks into the room and finds him sat up sipping orange juice. his smile disappears when sukuna comes close and grabs him by the shirt.

“why the hell would you get in the way”

“huh?”

“you heard me.”

“i don’t know what to tell you. you were in danger and i did it by instinct”

“i can take a blow.”

“i know”

“then don’t fucking do that again. if i make a mistake the price is mine to pay”

yuuji shrugs. “it wasn’t a rational choice. i can’t promise you i won’t do it again”

sukuna sighs, sits on the bed in front of him. “you’re such a brat” he grumbles, taking note of the way yuuji’s ears turn pink at the nickname. “just don’t jump in front of attacks that aren’t meant for you. i’m not asking, i’m telling you not to”

yuuji’s lips quirk up in a smile. “and since when do i listen to what you tell me to do?”

sukuna huffs out a laugh. “that’s true”, he admits, then cups yuuji’s face with his hand. “i couldn’t stand it if you were to be seriously hurt because of me.”

yuuji leans into the touch. “won’t happen. i’m tough, you know”

sukuna’s features soften. he smiles. “yeah, you are.”

there are megumi, nobara and gojo eavesdropping outside the door and nobara wants to scream, just kiss already!!! but they both know that’s not the right moment.

— the right moment comes a while later, when they’re alone. the sun is about to set and they’re still training, yuuji has sukuna pinned to the ground and accidentally hits him on the nose. as blood trickles down to his lips yuuji starts apologizing profusely but sukuna’s eyes are glinting in amusement and admiration and he just laughs fondly as he pulls yuuji down for a kiss.

#no rizz im just lucky my shit eating grin does it for him #sukuita #my post

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throneofrayllum · 1 month ago

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Lab Partners headcannons. Yes. You heard me.

Soyona had wanted Brooklynn dead for...obvious reasons, but when she had been doing research on Brook, she couldn't help but feel sorry she had to die. The girl had ambition, smarts, and wouldn't take no for an answer. She had also just happened to fall down a rabbit hole of Brooklynn's social media and hated to admit it but she found Brooklynn to be gorgeous.

When Brooklynn first saw who the broker was whilst spying, her first thought was "Holy fuck she's hot"

Brooklynn had scared Soyona. Not many people could do that. When Brooklynn had the clicker in her hand, Soyona had genuinely feared for her life. She liked that Brooklynn was able to scare her, even if she later realized the girl had no murderous bone in her body.

They don't trust each other fully, how could they? (especially Brooklynn). But they feel drawn to each other. Attracted. Soyona doesn't really mind the attraction, but Brooklynn? She hates it. How could she want someone who's done such awful things? Who literally tried to kill her? what?

Soyona does feel for Brooklynn, she notices when Brooklynn drinks a bit too much in an attempt to numb her pain, or the sound of muffled sobbing that comes from the guest room some nights.

Soyona enjoys watching Brooklynn marvel at her way of life. She secretly likes spoiling Brooklynn too.

Soyona lets Brooklynn wear her clothes because all she has are her jeans and t shirts, and they're relatively the same size. When Soyona took Brooklynn to an event she let Brooklynn borrow a suit (she threatened to take away Brooklynn's access to the liquor cabinet if she spilled on the suit).

Brooklynn is surprised to feel both flustered and...jealous when Soyona brings a woman home from a bar. She had just been finishing up some case files when Soyona waltzed in with a beautiful red head whom she brought straight to her room and shut the door. Seriously? Couldn't she have gone to rando lady's place?

The next afternoon, Brooklynn was bent over her desk, rummaging through files when Soyona ran her hand up Brooklynn's spine and whispered "You were Jealous last night." Brooklynn had scoffed, although a blush crept into her cheeks. "No I wasn't." She snapped. Soyona clicked her tongue, "So defensive." Before Soyona walked away she kissed the back of Brooklynn's neck.

The first time Soyona and Brook...y'know, Soyona had been painting Brooklynn. Soyona had once again felt like something was missing from the painting. "Take off the dress.", Soyona instructed. Brooklynn went red. "What?" She looked like she couldn't understand what language Soyona was speaking. "Take off your dress, it is not needed for this painting." Brooklynn felt nervous, but obeyed. When she was finally just in her underwear and bra, she raised her eyebrows at Soyona. "This what you want?" Soyona smirked, "Very much so." She continued to paint, but Brooklynn was hot all over. Soyona sighed, "I know you want me." Brooklynn snorted, "Yeah, right." Soyona stood from her seat and went to stand directly in front of Brooklynn. "Don't deny yourself. I know what your apprehension is about. But let me assure you, dear, just because you want me does not mean you have to love me. You would not be betraying anyone." Brooklynn looked into Soyona's eyes. "Fine, maybe your right. But what about you? Do you want me?" Soyona knelt before Brooklynn and ran her hands up Brooklynn's thighs. "What do you think, love?" AND THEN DOT DOT DOT

(please tell me you understand what I did with the "dot dot dot" mamma mia reference - it just means they bang)

HELP I'VE IMPLIED SOME SEXUAL THEMES IN KENLYNN HEADCANNONS/FICS BEFORE BUT I THINK THIS IS THE MOST RISQUE MY POSTS HAVE EVER GOTTEN

it's really pretty tame but still. Also WHY did this kinda turn into a fic?

#jwct #brooklynn jwcc #brooklynn x soyona santos #soyona santos #brokerlynn #lab partners

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ridiasfangirlings · 8 months ago

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What makes Yata and Saruhiko so good for each other, romantically and platonically?

The two of them were designed as parallels to each other and I think a lot of that is why they work so well together, both as friends and romantically. A lot of these kinda blur together between both platonic and romantic but just in general as partners, I think the fact that they manage to be different and yet have similarities makes their dynamic work. For example, Yata being loud and impulsive and not the smartest, compared to Fushimi being generally more analytical and cool-headed — Fushimi makes the plans and Yata carries them out. You can see this in LSW with the jungle surprise party (even though they fail, but they had no way of knowing at the time that they were up against a King), Fushimi is the one coordinating things while Yata is the person on the ground. They’re basically a good team in this way, where one can cover for the other’s weakness. They both have a similar sense of stubbornness and not wanting to lose which leads them to work well together, they’re very attuned to each other’s movements and style. Even after being apart for so long they still manage to work together perfectly in ROK to take down Sukuna, they don’t need to even discuss their plan because even in this situation they both know how the other fights (compared to the earlier fight at the beginning of the season, where Fushimi in particular is not even trying to be in sync with Yata, and I think the fight at the end shows that even after all that time Fushimi absolutely could have teamed up perfectly with Yata if he’d been willing to let himself do it).

Emotionally I think they also work well even though they’ve had communication issues, because again there’s a lot of covering for each other’s ‘weaknesses,’ so to speak. Fushimi is intellectually mature where Yata’s not that bright but emotionally Yata’s considerably more mature (not without his problems, of course, but we see throughout the series how he’s growing in that aspect) while Fushimi has the emotional maturity of a kitchen knife. That Yata’s so honest and wears his emotions on his sleeve is I think something that works really well with Fushimi particularly in a romantic aspect, because Fushimi is not at all versed in reading things on an emotional level that aren’t said and I think he’d struggle with a partner who doesn’t show affection strongly because Fushimi can’t help but read lack of affection as rejection. That Yata is very clear and open with his feelings is something Fushimi needs, even in middle school I think Fushimi himself would never want to admit just how much good it did him that Yata would touch him casually, and of course he’s always been clear about that ‘look at me with shining eyes.’ On the opposite side while Yata does struggle to understand Fushimi it’s something he’s willing to work on because Yata’s a stubborn person who won’t give up on someone he loves, Yata knows that Fushimi has prickly parts of his personality but Yata also knows that Fushimi is amazing so he has a lot more tolerance than I think many people would have when it comes to Fushimi being sharp-tongued or gloomy.

Similarly Yata’s bright personality compared to Fushimi’s gloomy one works in their favor. I think having Fushimi there to help balance him keeps Yata from becoming overbearing at times — contrast Yata’s experience with the Yata Team in middle school, where Yata is dragging them around even though they don’t like him, versus how he talks to Fushimi, I think he’s able to keep himself in check more around Fushimi because if he does start running off to do what he wants Fushimi will click his tongue and basically pull Yata back down. For Fushimi, I think it helps that Yata’s so willing to go with Fushimi’s flow and fill silences on his own, not expecting anything from Fushimi other than what Fushimi wants to give. In Side Red there’s the whole scene at the amusement park where Fushimi ends up next to Mikoto and is all uncomfortable and awkward, feeling like he has to say something and hating it because Fushimi can’t stand not knowing what this person wants from him or what’s expected of him. But Yata’s always nothing but clear when it comes to that sort of thing, if the two of them were sitting together Yata’s perfectly willing to keep the conversation going on his own while waiting for Fushimi to chime in with something Yata knows will be amazing. The two of them are just clearly so comfortable together when they’re not at odds, like despite their differences they both fit together perfectly.

#sarumi #Talking K #I feel like this flowed better in my head #so I hope it makes sense #basically they both parallel and mirror each other #and I think that's why they get along so well #bc parts of them are so alike and the different parts support each other

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reallyghostlypost · 6 months ago

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[Fic] The dangers of camping in the valley's forests

You know what Stardew Valley needs? More cryptids and unknown creatures. Also more fics with Jadu and Gill.

Jadu wrapped his cloak tighter around him. He actually liked whenever Camilla was sending him to visit Marlon, listening to him and Gill share stories and gossip around the campfire was always a delight, but he really couldn't get used with the weather in the Valley. Autumn nights here were always bitter cold for him, used with either the desert heat or the dry cold nights of the Badlands, not these humid winds that seem to seep into your bones. He took another gulp of hot mulled wine and looked up at the mountains.

The nature surrounding them was already shrouded in darkness despite the sky still having a greyish orange tint from the setting sun. The vegetation was too thick to see even a foot forward and to someone trained to fight in open terrain of the corrupted desert it felt really claustrophobic. Shadow brutes, or any monster really, could be just a few steps away from him and he wouldn't be any wiser.

Jadu moved closer to the fire, feeling his teeth start to clatter. Really, he wasn't a child any longer to get scared by creepy stories told around the fire. But he couldn't help but feel that the shadows between the trees were unnaturally dark. He realized that Marlon stopped speaking a while ago and that made him tense suddenly. What was happening?

Looking up he noticed both Marlon and Gill staring at the same spot... tree? Jadu tried to see whatever got their attention but there didn't seem to be anything there. A sound then came from the darkness, like a stream of water running over rocks. Were they this close to the river? But listening closer he could also hear whispers, like a group of people were close by speaking silently with each other. Jadu gripped the wand stashed in his robes.

He was started to feel dizzy. This odd noise of water and whispers reminded him when he was training with Camilla by the river. He still didn't know what potion she gave him that time, but it was supposed to help him communicate with the elementals. The river then started to speak with him in a similar way, to call him with whispers hidden beneath the clear sound of running water, awfully familiar, and Jadu knew that he would be able to understand what it was telling him if only he could get a little closer. He could feel his mouth numb, a weird sweet taste on his tongue. He was so close to the water now, only a step forward and he could fall in the river to join the whispers, when a hand shot up to stop him from drowning himself.

Jadu jumped violently pulling the wand from his robes only to point it at Gill. "Sorry lad, but you looked really out of it." Gill apologized before removing his hand from his shoulder. Jadu was still panting trying to figure out what was happening. He could feel sweat on his back despite the cold air surrounding them.

"That owl is back." Marlon said in a tired voice. Jadu looked at the scarred adventurer then back at the same tree Marlon has been watching before, but he still couldn't see anything. Gill patted his shoulder without a word and pointed at a branch higher up in the tree and that's when Jadu noticed it. It was a small white owlet with black spots all over its feathers, small enough that could fit in the palm of his hand, but it was... wrong. Its almond shaped eyes were pitch black, with no pupils or irises, and was that a third eye on its forehead or just another black spot?

As soon as he laid eyes on the small owl his head cleared and most of the cold and dread was gone. Were they caused by the critter? Now that he was less confused Jadu could definitely recognize it as a dark elemental, inhuman spirit birthed from the darkness of the forests covering so much of the southern part of the Ferngill Republic.

The owlet opened its small black beak and the same weird water sounds mixed with whispers came out from it. Jadu could feel his ears getting stuffy, and the same coldness was starting to encroach him again. Marlon picked a rock and threw it at the bird who flew off with a horrible scream, like dozens of bats screeching at the same time. Just as it disappeared into the brown dry foliage Jadu noticed that it had a second identical face on the back of its head, it's second pair of eyes staring straight at him, making the hair at the back of his head stand up.

"Don't worry." Marlon reassured him as he poured more hot wine in his mug and urging him to drink. The heat of the wine felt good. "You'll get used with its magic soon enough and it won't affect you this badly."

"It hid into a crack of our roof for a while and we couldn't understand why we kept having nightmares or hallucinated in the middle of the day." Gill chuckled. "It wasn't pleasant, but the owl seems otherwise harmless. It keeps following us around and tries to get back into that crack before we chase it away, so we got used with it by now."

"More and more spirits like that have started to appear. Magnus has been working overtime trying to keep the dangerous ones from getting close to the town so he doesn't have time to chase away the smaller elementals from mingling with humans. We considered requesting a meeting with Camilla but things are under control for now and we don't want to take more of her time."

"Weird." Jadu managed to say before starting to cough. His throat felt weird and dry which made him scowl. Why was he so affected that small spirit?

Marlon gave him a sympathetic look. "Don't beat yourself up lad. You're trained to deal with desert spirits not forest ones. Spend more time here and you'll recognize their magic before they can charm you."

"Yeah." Gill remarked dryly. "Like we did last week when we started accusing each other of whispering in the middle of the night." Marlon huffed amused at that before taking a sip from his own mug.

"I'll speak with Camilla about this, maybe she can think of some solution without the need of a whole council meeting." Jadu picked a dry fish from the pile of food placed between them. "When did it start to happen?"

Marlon and Gill looked at each other for a second before Gill cleared his throat. "When spring came around and the new farmer moved in the valley."

"Farmer?" Jadu was confused. What did a farmer had to do with spirits and elementals acting weird?

"Oh, kid." Marlon sighted. "You have no idea what a long history that cursed farm has."

#farmer moves in and the whole valley goes crazy #moss takes over everything #green rain that wasn't seen by anyone alive there before now happens every summer #magical butterflies appear in winter #so why not other creatures?#creatures deep from the forest being curious about the new forest magic user?#like noisy creepy little owls #stardew marlon #stardew gill #sve jadu #sve fic #my fic

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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 1 year ago

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Twist English player here, but I can just imagine Floyd being able to understand Stitch, the two of them begining to communicate with each other. But much to everyone's chagrin, Floyd immediately adapts to it, talking like Stitch. 🤣🤣 Floyd knows exactly what he's saying and doing, and it gets on everyone's nerves, especially Azul's and his professors!😂

We stan our multilingual kings 😩 (I actually completely forgot that Stitch learned English during my recent rewatch of the Lilo and Stitch movies, so it surprised me when he started speaking something other than his alien language—) Maybe Floyd would casually learn + repeat the most offensive phrases just to fuck with people... Good luck to Jack, Riddle, Ace, and Azul who have to put up with him all event--

Who knows?? Maybe Lilia can pick up on some of what Stitch says as well. Of the group, Lilia is definitely the most well-traveled and has experienced the most cultures--not to mention that he's canonically multilingual, as we see in book 7. Lilia has tried to teach Silver the language of nocturnal fae before, and he also seemed to perfectly understand the pixies that reported to him (when we previously learned that most big fae need a special translating bell to understand pixies). He also, of course, speaks what appears to be the common tongue of Twisted Wonderland.

... Is that why those two are the SSRs for this event? Because they'd be the most lenient and "let's go with the flow!" when it comes to Stitch's shenanigans?

#twst #twisted wonderland #Floyd Leech #Azul Ashengrotto #Riddle Rosehearts #Ace Trappola #Jack Howl #Lilia Vanrouge #disney twisted wonderland #notes from the writing raven #Stitch #Lilo and Stitch #Silver

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lilyevanstan1325 · 10 months ago

Text

❤️ Built For This World ❤️

Chapter 9

My head hurts like a bitch.

My breath rises laboriously down my throat, coming out in trembling sighs from my ajar mouth.

I've been locked in Dale's RV for hours now and I don't plan on going anywhere, not until I'm sure Carol is okay.

Just as I am certain that my friend will never be okay again.

Never again.

A deafening silence surrounds us.

With my arms folded over the small table and my head resting on them I cast yet another worried glance in Daryl's direction.

The man is sitting on the sink counter, right next to the vehicle door.

Our eyes meet for a fraction of a second then he drops his gaze on the rifle he still holds in his arms.

We've been going like this for hours.

It's as if he feels guilty and can't keep his gaze on me, it's as if he fears seeing the disappointment in my eyes towards him because he feels personally responsible for what happened to Sophia.

I can see the anger and the pain eating him up from inside.

Even if only partially, I understand what he is feeling.

Daryl poured his heart into this research and now he feels like all this failure falls on his shoulders.

Sophia's death was a heavy blow for everyone.

Carol continues to sob and with each sob my heart breaks more and more.

Out the window I can see the others at work.

Some are digging holes while the others are moving the bodies.

I bury my face in my crossed arms again.

Old pains inside me seem to awaken, making my guts twist in a painful way.

It's as if in a fraction of a second, in the infinitesimal time that that damned bullet ended Sophia's life, all my demons resurrected from the dark place of my heart where I had buried them.

Even though I didn't have the time to get to know and love that little girl, I feel like I've lost someone important again.

Her death broke another small portion of my heart.

Nothing will be the same.

Carol will never be the same again.

Daryl will never be the same again.

And I know how selfish it is of me to worry about something like this but her death will inevitably change my relationship with these two people.

I feel like I've lost a mother for the second time.

A soft whistle makes me lift my head.

Daryl is looking at me intensely, in his eyes a concern that goes beyond human comprehension, in his eyes there is perhaps too much pain for a single soul.

“Ya good?” he whispers, his voice hoarse, speaking to me for the first time since he joined Carol and me in this RV.

I shrug weakly before immediately returning my attention to the woman in front of me.

Carol sitting on the bed and looking out the window doesn't even seem to notice our presence.

Her gaze is fixed and absent as if her mind is light years away.

And I feel fucking helpless.

Helpless in this such immense pain.

I think back to my mom, I think back to the day I had to say goodbye to her.

The knowledge that I will never see her smile again, that my ears will never again be able to enjoy her sweet laughter, hits me with such violence that it makes me breathless.

I think back to the last time I saw my father, I think back to the fact that I couldn't say goodbye to him...

A wave of tears gathers in my eyes forcing me to hide my face in my arms again.

Trying to hide the sobs shaking my chest, I bite my tongue until it bleeds.

A hand brushes my shoulder and then a strong arm wraps around them and I find myself with my face pressed against the archer's chest.

“Shhhhh.Everythin’ will be fine, sunshine” Daryl whispers in my ear, trying to gently silence my crying.

I feel terribly guilty.

What right do I have to cry?

Who gives me the right to suffer when in front of me I have a woman who has lost her little girl?

I feel like a monster and this only makes my sobs increase.

I try to suffocate them forcefully by burying my face in the man's chest and crumpling the fabric of his shirt between my fingers.

“Hey” he murmurs in a faint strangled voice, also wrapping his other arm around me, drawing me towards his body and taking me into his arms, he makes me sit on his lap.

I'm sorry to make him worry about me too but I can't help but feel happy for his closeness at this moment.

I should be stronger and be the one ready to console but in this moment all I can offer to Carol is just my presence, I can't do more.

I finally look up at Daryl's face who, despite being destroyed by pain, gives me a small smile, just a corner of his lips raised.

“Hey” he repeats cupping my face in his big hands.

“It will be fine.Now we have to be strong, alrigh’?”

I nod imperceptibly before his lips caress mine with such sweetness that it makes me tremble.

A light knock on the door makes us jump while Carol on the other hand doesn't even seem to notice.

After a few moments the door of the RV opens and Lori steps in.

The woman looks exhausted, her swollen and red eyes rest on me for a moment.

She doesn't seem surprised by my closeness to Daryl as she sketches a shy, tired smile in our direction after which she lets out a shaky breath as she lowers her gaze.

“They're ready.Come on” she exhales as if these few simple words had drained her of all energy.

I know what her words mean.

And God only knows how much they hurt.

My attention immediately shifts to Carol.

The woman shakes her head slightly without moving her tormented gaze from the window.

“Why?” she whispers.

Her voice brims with resignation.

Daryl beneath me shifts slightly, tightening his grip on me.

“’Cause that's yer little girl” he replies softly as his worry-filled eyes move to the woman.

Finally Carol's gaze turns towards us and the harshness I see within them scares me.

“That's not my little girl.That's some other…thing” she says, choking on her own words.

Then she lowers her gaze again, looking back at the field outside the RV.

For a moment no one speaks, perhaps too shocked by the cynicism of her words.

I can't understand her.

I didn't see my mother turn into one of those monstrous beings but I'm sure that even if it had happened, I would have wanted to witness her burial.

I would still have given her a last final goodbye.

“My Sophia…” Carol whispers in a breathy voice.

“My Sophia was alone in the woods.All this time I thought…” her words are just a quiet murmur as she fights her own tears.

“She didn't cry herself to sleep.She didn't go hungry.She didn't try to find her way back.Sophia died a long time ago”

I can feel Daryl tense up.

The resigned words of our friend crumbled the man's last bit of self-control.

I can feel the anger, the anger at not being able to find Sophia in time, boiling under his skin and crashing in waves all around him.

Lori, head bowed, steps back out of the RV.

I need to do something so without thinking twice I get up from my little safe haven and join Carol with a couple of determined, almost furious strides.

The man's determined footsteps sound behind me but when I turn around he is no longer there.

All this is definitely too much for him and, rather than bursting out and threw up all his disappointment, he has decided that it is better to let it go.

I stand in front of the woman, my hands resting on my hips and a thousand words that continue to boil into my head.

I breathe in and out slowly trying to calm my heartbeat.

“Carol, you can't be serious” I begin, trying to keep my emotions in check.

Now it's not about me but about her.

And I care enough about her to stop her from doing something I'm sure she'll regret in the future.

The woman doesn't even look at me, her stubborn gaze far from mine.

She shrugs as if to tell me who cares.

Softening my gaze and my posture I sit on the bed next to her tapping my knee on hers.

Slowly and with a sigh she turns in my direction, her large shining eyes making my stomach tighten in a vice.

I don't think I've ever seen so much pain reflected in the eyes of another human being.

Losing someone you love is always painful but losing a daughter...

I don't think there is a greater pain.

No one should ever feel such sorrow.

I lost my mom, my dad, my life...yet I survived.

Yet I still fight.

But Sophia…she was her flesh and blood.

Every breath she takes hurts right now and will do so for every single day she lives.

Even though she will be surrounded by people who love her she will never love anyone else like she loved her sweet little girl.

And it is precisely for this reason that Carol must give her a final goodbye.

“Carol I won't pretend to understand how you feel right now, really.But you have to do it.You have to get out of here and say goodbye to your little girl”

The woman shakes her head, a few tears escape her control sliding down her cheeks.

“Listen to me.That may not be your little girl out there but her spirit is still here.Give her the peace she deserves.Sophia deserves to rest in peace and she will never be able to do so if her mom doesn't let her go”

The words get stuck in my throat but I continue undaunted, even ignoring the woman's sobs which slowly grow in intensity.

I grab her hands and squeeze them in mine.

“You're not alone, Carol.You have Daryl.You have Rick.And Dale, and Lori, and Glenn.We are all here for you.I'm here for you.You have me”

I lift her hands still clasped in mine to kiss her knuckles softly and stop fighting my own tears.

“I am here.I know that nothing will ever fill that void but I'm here.Maybe you don't even care but if you give up...I need you Carol.If you don't say goodbye to your sweet little girl today you will lose yourself...I will lose you”

A sob shakes both of our chests at the same time.

I sniffle, wiping my tears against my own shoulder.

“If it wasn't for you maybe I would still be tied up in that stable or Shane would have already broken my neck.You are all I have left.Please Carol…I've already lost my mom…I can't lose you too”

I know it's sound so fucking selfish.

I know I should think of her best.

But…but I've already lost so much that I don't know if I could get through this too.

By now we are both crying without any restraint.

Both heartbroken but for two completely opposite reasons.

Then through tears and pain Carol nods.

I smile at her weakly through tears.

“I will be with you, step by step.I'll stick so close to your ass that you'll end up hating me.But you will never be alone.Never” I tell her, drawing a light laugh from her which is immediately suffocated by yet another sob from her.

I let go of her hands so I can hug her.

I hold her head against my chest, stroking her hair.

Carol presses her face against me and I let her vent, welcoming all her tears, all her pain, hoping to make it a little mine and lighten this painful load on her soul.

When we arrive near the trees where the holes were dug for Sophia and Hersel's family, there is no one left.

Hesitant Carol approaches the smaller mound of earth, kneeling in front of it.

Without disturbing her, I kneel next to her, stroking her back in a reassuring manner.

Carol lowers her head, sinking her hands into the freshly loose dirt, crying all her tears, giving vent to all her pain.

“It's okay, honey.It's okay” I try to reassure her when the tears seem to take her breath away.

Footsteps come from behind us.

Daryl clears his throat before dropping to one knee alongside Carol.

In his hands he holds a small bouquet of Cherokee roses.

I smile at his sweet gesture.

“Do ya want…”

Carol shakes her head vigorously, interrupting the man.

“Would you do it for me?” she croaks in response.

Daryl doesn't have to be told twice and, standing up, places the flowers on little Sophia's grave with unprecedented delicacy.

When he stands up, his gaze rests on my face for a moment and then immediately lowers it and turns his back on us.

Even though the contact between our eyes was brief, I managed to catch the glimmer of his tears.

Making sure Carol is okay, I get up, brushing the dirt off my knees with my hands and with a hesitant step I approach the man's back, placing a hand on it.

Daryl gasps violently without turning so determined to respect his wishes I don't look for his gaze.

I just hug him from behind, intertwining my fingers on his abdomen.

His chest rises and falls rapidly.

He is crying.

And for the umpteenth time today my heart breaks.

I rest my cheek on his back trying to offer him the only thing I have at the moment.

My love.

Because yes, it may be crazy, but I feel like I feel something for this man that goes far beyond the simple attraction.

Because, surrounded by all this pain, I understood that if I had been the one to lose him, I wouldn't have tolerated it.

Today with the discovery of Sophia's now dead body I clearly understood that I cannot lose him.

“I'm here, big boy.I'm here" I whisper kissing him between his shoulder blades.

In response, his calloused fingers intertwine with mine and his breathing slowly slows, his body relaxes.

Daryl Dixon is all I have and I will always protect him.

I will forever protect his pure and tortured soul.

Behind us, a rustle of clothes followed by a timid voice brings us back to the present.

I slowly release my hands from the archer's and focus on Carol again.

A sad smile flits across her face as she stretches her arms in my direction.

Without having to tell me anything I give her what her eyes are asking me.

I hug her and even though I'm shorter than her I welcome her head against my chest.

Her arms envelop me while her voice, made hoarse by her tears, murmurs a small thank you.

Carol raises her head and waving a hand behind me she whispers “Come here, pookie”

After a few moments, Daryl's chest is pressed against my back.

All three held in one embrace.

All together as a family.

Because now we are a family.

We may not be connected by blood but something much stronger unites us.

We chose each other and we will protect each other as long as we have breath in our bodies.

After making sure Carol was okay, I begged Daryl to never leave her side and to come find me if there were any problems.

“Hey, I can handle her.Go” murmurs the archer, squeezing my upper arm with his hand and after kissing my forehead he moves away and sits a few steps away from Carol who is kneeling again in front of her daughter's tomb.

I really want to stay here and not leave her but I need to go check on Rick.

The desperation painted in his eyes after he pulled the trigger haunts a part of my brain.

His lost gaze wandering aimlessly as it fell on every person gathered around him is seared into my mind.

With a determined step I head towards Hersel's big house.

When my feet touch the first steps of the porch I feel a shiver shake me.

The house seems quiet when I walk through the door so looking around I head towards the kitchen but halfway I bump into a figure who quickly tries to reach the back door.

“Ouch” I hiss, running my hand over the bandage over my eyebrow as Glenn wraps a hand around his nose, his eyes bright from the impact.

“Where are you going in such a hurry, buddy?” I peep, pressing my fingers over the white gauze, underneath I can feel the slight pulsation from the stitches.

Glenn moves his hand away from his face, sniffing.

“Sorry Sum.I'm catching up with Rick.We're going to look for Hersel” he replies, trying to dodge me to reach the door.

I follow him, following his every step.

Hersel?

Why?

What happened?

“Glenn!” I get his attention by grabbing his hand.

The boy stops his run, finally resting his eyes on me.

“Beth seems to be in shock and we can't find Hersel anywhere.Rick and I are going to the bar downtown to look for him”

I nod once.

“I'll come with you” I offer immediately.

Even though a big part of me is screaming at me to stay here, to protect Carol, to stay by Daryl's side, I know I can't do it.

A little voice in my head keeps telling me that right now I'm an outsider and that I can't intrude on these people's pain so any distraction is welcomed.

And looking for the vet, being able to move away from here, seems to me to be the most suitable solution.

Glenn shakes his head as he grabs a rifle from on top of an old coffee table.

Before he can argue I place the flat palm of my hand against his mouth.

“I'm not asking your permission” I wink and, watching him while he snorts resignedly, I follow him through the back door.

Once outside we find Maggie leaning with her back to the wall and her arms crossed in front of her chest.

Smiling at her I leave them alone as I approach Rick.

The former officer doesn't even look at me but I can see a corner of his lips lifting into a sly smile.

“I bet you'll join us” he murmurs with a nod towards the car.

“Obviously.In fact, I'm offended that you didn't come looking for me.Do you really think I would have let you go alone?” I reply in a light but serious tone, giving him a playful shove.

Rick chuckles under his breath.

“Do you have a weapon?”

“I have my knife”

“Take this” he replies handing me a gun which I accept without replying.

I know that the use of guns must be strictly necessary due to the noise but nowadays it is better not to be caught unprepared.

“Does Daryl know?”

His question catches me off guard, making my gaze move from the weapon I hold in my hands to his face.

His clear blue eyes are focused behind me.

“He's not my fucking nanny” I huff, following the direction of his gaze.

My lips curve upwards.

“They're cute, aren't they?” I chuckle, returning my attention to the man next to me.

Rick smiles and then directs his glittering gaze of mischievous into mine.

“Yeah.You and Daryl are cute too.This is why you have to tell him where you're going because I don't want to catch an arrow up my ass”

I blush at his statement but intending not to show it I put on a cooky smile.

“Your ass is safe, cop.Let's go” I urge him, getting into the car while Glenn joins us with his shoulders down.

Rick sits in the driving seat while Glenn sits next to him, I sit in the center of the back seat so I can have a good view of the road and the men in front of me.

The journey proceeds in silence.

None of us speak perhaps too lost in our mental ruminations.

Too many things happened today and all too quickly.

Shane lost his mind.

We have all lost it.

Heavy words were flown and after all this I don't know if the group will ever go back to how it used to be.

Glenn continues to fidget on his spot.

Rick sends me worried looks through the rearview mirror, looks to which I respond with constant shrugs.

I honestly can't understand what's going on in my friend's head at the moment.

When the outlines of the buildings in the city appear on the horizon Glenn breaks the silence that surrounds us.

“Maggie said she loves me” he suddenly blurts out, turning his gaze towards Rick.

I smile radiantly.

“That’s great, Glenn” I laugh, leaning forward and placing a hand on his shoulder.

Glenn looks back at me but his face is serious.

Too serious.

Wait.

“That's a good thing, right?” I ask now unsure.

I certainly didn't expect such a detached reaction from the delivery guy.

If I had been in his place, if Daryl had said he loved me, I think I would have jumped out of my own skin.

The thought makes me blush and I chew my lower lip.

Glenn lets out a nervous laugh.

“She doesn't mean It.I mean she doesn't.I mean…well…she…she's upset or confused.She’s probably feeling like…” he exclaims, speaking hurriedly, the stuttered words rolling off his lips quickly.

“I think she's smart enough to know what she's feeling” Rick interrupts, eliciting a confident shake of the head from Glenn.

“No, no!”

Rick and I smile amused by his reaction.

“No it does not.You know what?She wants to be in love, so she's…she needs something to…to, like…to hold onto” continues the boy undaunted.

I can understand him.

Nowadays, becoming so attached to someone, even falling in love, is always a big risk.

We may never live long enough or even worse we may helplessly witness the death of those we love.

I understand why he tries to push away her feelings.

After all, how long has he known Maggie?

He knows her just a few days longer than I know Daryl.

I understand how the magnitude of such a huge, sudden feeling can catch you off guard.

But that doesn't mean it's right to reject it, on the contrary we must live it as much as we can because if Sophia's death has taught us anything it is that nothing lasts forever anymore.

Then it's best to bask in what little love we have left in the little time we have left.

“Glenn, it's pretty obvious to everyone Maggie loves you.For everyone except you of course, you stupid hassole.And not just because you're one of the last men standing” I encourage him, resting my chin on the seat where he sits.

Rick nods as if he agrees with every single word I say.

“I mean what's the problem?” I add softly.

Glenn looks out the window as if he's trying to coax the right words into his confused head.

“I didn't say it back”

“Shit” Rick and I exclaim at the same time.

I rise from my position to rest my back against the soft leather seat crossing my arms over my chest.

“Oh man.You fucked up” I tease him by pushing the sole of my boot against his seat.

“Hey!” he exclaims, turning his torso in my direction.

“I was nervous, okay?I've never had a woman say that to me before.You know, except for my mom, of course, and my sisters.But with Maggie, it's different.We barely know each other.What…what does she really know about me?Nothing!We're practically strangers”

The words slip out of my mouth before I can realize it.

“So?Even I barely know Daryl but I love him anyway”

When my words hit my own ears I curse myself.

I look down at my crossed arms chewing my cheeks nervously.

Why the hell did I say that?

God, I wish right now a chasm would open up under my stupid ass and swallow me.

A loud laugh resonates in the cockpit making me blush even more, I can feel my blood rushing through my veins violently.

I risk a look in front of me, finding Glenn's sly smile and Rick's bright and attentive eyes staring at me from the rearview mirror.

“Not a word, dumbass” I mutter, making both of us laugh this time.

Rick shakes his head with an amused expression and then turns his attention to the man sitting next to him.

“Listen to me, Glenn.This is a good thing, something we don't get enough of these days.Enjoy it.And when we get back, return the favor.It's not like she's going anywhere.And…”

I can feel Rick's smile as he turns his head ever so slightly in my direction.

“Same goes for you Summer.Tell Daryl how you feel”

Determined to ignore him I refuse to meet his gaze, he's too amused for my tastes.

“We're not talking about me.Keeps driving, sheriff” I murmur with an angry frown as the man slows down, having now reached the center of the city.

I don't like this attention towards me.

After a few minutes Rick pulls over the car and looking around, making sure the road is clear of dangers, we get out of the car and go into the bar that Maggie had suggested.

The room is dark and dusty.

Under my feet the dark wooden floor, matching the chairs and tables, creaks.

Rick proceeds slowly and Glenn, after a final glance towards the street, closes the door behind us.

Hersel is sitting on a stool right in front of us, his back to us while his arms are resting on the counter, in his hands he seems to be holding a glass full of an amber liquid.

After everything that's happened, I'd be lying if I said I wouldn't like a drop too.

“Hersel?” Rick calls him cautiously.

The man doesn't flinch, he doesn't move.

He doesn't seem at all surprised by our presence.

“Who's with you?” the man asks without turning.

His voice barely holds back the agonizing pain.

For him we are only the murderers of his family, we are the people who turned his peaceful life upside down.

“Summer.And Glenn” replies the former officer remaining still.

“Did Maggie send them?”

“They volunteered.They're worried”

Glenn and I exchange a look, leaving Rick to resolve the matter.

Slowly Rick approaches.

I grab Glenn's hand and indicate with a nod to one of the tables, the furthest from the two men but the closest to the windows at the entrance, so as to be able to leave the right amount of privacy to the two men but close enough to keep an eye on the situation outside.

Rick and Hersel's words are just a low murmur so I take the opportunity to talk to Glenn.

“Hey!What happened after…” I don't finish my sentence, Glenn knows what I'm referring to.

What happened after Rick shot Sophia.

Glenn glances at the counter and then brings his big dark eyes back to me.

With a slow movement he places the rifle on the table, running his hands through his hair.

“Shane accused Hersel of knowing that Sophia was in the barn and now he wants us out of his land”

“Shit”

“Yeah, shit”

“And you?What do you think you will do?” I ask even though deep down I already know the answer.

“What do you mean?" he whispers in response, avoiding my gaze.

One corner of my lips lifts.

I gently place a hand on that of the boy in front of me.

“You know what I'm talking about”

Glenn shakes his head, removing his hand from my grip and crossing his arms over his chest.

I can feel the confusion in his mind from here.

“I honestly don't know”

“Are you sure?”

“Maggie will never leave her family”

“I know”

“And I can't leave mine” Glenn sighs heartbroken, finally deciding to bring his frightened and lost gaze back into mine.

“Glenn, we are not your family”

I immediately stop him with a wave of my hand when I see his gaze darken, offended by my words.

“I don't mean that.Yes, it's true we are a family but she is the love of your life.How do you think I can ever live in peace knowing that I took you away from her?None of us could stand it, Glenn.But she has her father, Beth, Patricia, Jimmy.They have a safe place and I...I would be much calmer knowing you were there than in the middle of that shit out there” I try to make him think while I point the way outside with a finger.

Glenn sighs, closing his eyes and leaning back in the chair, his fingers wrapping around the locks of his hair, pulling them tightly.

The situation he finds himself in is not easy because, putting myself in his shoes, I am sure that, even though the choice would make me suffer, I would choose to follow the person I love.

I would choose Daryl.

“If Daryl asked you to give up everything and everyone, would you do it?”

I nod again before Glenn finishes his question.

He looks at me with a skeptical frown, I smile back at him.

“This doesn't mean I don't care about you but I'm sure I'll never find such a great love again.How could I leave him behind?”

Glenn seems to reflect on my words even though his furrowed eyebrows indicate that an ocean of conflicting emotions is still churning within him.

Some footsteps catch our attention and when we look behind us we see Rick approach the door of the bar and open it, Glenn and I immediately go alongside him to understand what is happening.

Rick shakes his head dejectedly but he seems to think about something so he turns back to the vet who still stubbornly turns his back on us.

“So what do we do?Just wait for him to pass out?” Glenn asks on the doorstep.

“Just go.Just go!” Hersel silences us.

Rick takes a couple of steps in his direction.

“I promised Maggie I'd bring you home safe”

Rick barely keeps his calm as he tries to reason with the man who in response snorts amused.

“Like you promised that little girl?”

His words take us by surprise with their wickedness.

He must be really upset, Hersel isn't like that.

But before Glenn and I can avoid it, Rick reaches the man, his nervous footsteps sounding loud and confident on the old wooden floor.

“So what's your plan?Finish that bottle?Drink yourself to death and leave your girls alone?”

“Stop telling me how to care for my family, my farm” Hersel blurts out, slamming the empty glass on the counter and finally deciding to get up and face Rick angrily.

“Your people are like a plague!I do a Christian thing, give you shelter, and you destroy it all!” he shouts while gesticulating senselessly but Rick doesn't seem intimidated by all that anger.

“The world was already in bad shape when we met”

“And you take no responsibility!You're supposed to be their leader!”

“Well I'm here now, aren't I?”

The two men are now shouting at each other.

With the tip of my boot I hit Glenn's foot, silently asking him if we shouldn't intervene before the situation can escalate further or, even worse, their screams can attract unwanted attention.

Glenn raises a hand as if telling me to wait.

In fact, after a few moments Hersel seems to calm down and regain some lucidity.

“Yes.Yes, you are” he sighs, staggering towards the stool and collapsing onto it, after which he grabs the glass and takes another sip.

“Come on” Rick urges him again with an authoritative voice but this time with a little more sweetness.

“Your girls need you now more than ever” I whisper moving closer until I reach the man, placing a hand on his shoulder.

Hersel looks at me with his deep blue eyes with a storm reflected in them.

“I didn't want to believe you” he says, dodging my hand violently but keeping his gaze fixed on mine.

“You told me there was no cure, that these people were dead, not sick.I choose not to believe that.But when Shane shot Lou in the chest and she just kept coming, that's when I knew what an ass I'd been, that Annette had been dead long ago and I was feeding a rotten corpse!That's when I knew there was no hope.And when that little girl came out of the barn, the look on your face, while you held her mother in your arms, I knew you knew too.Right?”

His words freeze my blood in my veins.

I remember that moment.

The moment I realized it was all over.

That there is no more hope.

That all hope died the moment Sophia stepped out of that damn barn.

The sweet vet's eyes are filled with tears just like mine.

Behind us Rick and Glenn seem to be holding their breath.

“There is no hope, Summer.And you know it now, like I do.Don't you?”

I put a hand on my chest trying to contain the pain that this man's words are awakening in my old broken soul.

A solitary tear escapes my control, eliciting a bitter smile from the man.

“There is no hope for any of us, Summer” he sighs, turning his back on me again.

My gaze shifts to my two friends who are looking at me helplessly while I sink into my own pain but...it is thanks to they worried gaze that I find the way back to myself.

I approach and position myself between them.

“It's not like that Hersel.Maybe...maybe a week ago I would have agreed with you.I was alone.Scared.I was ready to die alone.But then…then I found them” I murmur, smiling sweetly at the two men.

“I found friends”

I smile in Glenn's direction.

“I found a brother”

I say with more and more conviction, touching Rick's hand.

“I found love”

And I feel my heart explode thinking about the gruff man who must surely be worrying waiting for my return.

“I found a family.I have found hope again”

This time my voice sounds strong and confident around us.

“And if you can't see the beauty and the wonder and how God is so immense to still grant us these joys in this dirty, depraved world I feel sorry for you Hersel.I'm really sorry”

Glenn wraps an arm around my shoulders, leaving a kiss on my temple.

Rick squeezes my hand and then approaches Hersel in a last tired attempt to make him reason once and for all.

“Look, I'm done.I'm not doing this anymore, cleaning up after you.Do you know what the truth is?Nothing has changed.Death is death.It's always been there, whether it's from a heart attack, cancer or a walker.What's the difference?You didn't think it was hopeless before, did you?Now there are people back at home trying to hang on.They need us even if it's just to give them a reason to go on, even if we don't believe it ourselves”

Rick wearily runs a hand over his face, nerves on edge.

This discussion is wearing him down.

He believes in what he says.

He truly believes there is still hope.

And I believe it too.

“You know what?This…this isn't about what we believe anymore.It's about them.It's about Beth.It's about Maggie and Glenn.It's about Summer.It's about my pregnant wife.Now it's only about the people we love, the people we want to protect”

Hersel remains silent, visibly affected by Rick's words.

He stares at us for a few interminable seconds and then after drinking the contents of the glass to the last drop he stands up.

I smile encouragingly in his direction as Rick squeezes his shoulder affectionately.

Suddenly the door behind us creaks and two armed men appear in the doorway.

Damn.

We were so distracted by ourselves that we didn't stay alert enough.

After a quick look inside the two men focus their gaze on me making me shiver.

Glenn notices this and slowly, almost casually, grabs my wrist and moves me behind him.

“Son of bitch.They're alive" one of the two men sneers.

Both seem quite strong and this makes me suspect that they belong to a large and resourceful group.

They're basically a fucking danger.

They approach one of the tables while Glenn and I slowly move behind the counter.

Rick, feigning courtesy, approaches the table, pouring them both a generous dose of the same liquor that Hersel was drinking.

“I’m Dave” one of the two men introduces himself.

He is very tall, with short hair and a look that is too attentive for my tastes.

He is wearing an old pair of dark jeans and his arms are left exposed by a sleeveless t-shirt.

Around his neck he wears a gold chain that clashes terribly with everything else.

His fingers tighten around the butt of his gun.

His dark eyes rest on me again, looking me up and down and then winking in a way that in his fucking mind should be attractive.

I gag mentally.

In response I roll my eyes while Glenn stiffens, moving the rifle in his hands in order to get the guy's attention.

Dave continues with his rant as if nothing had happened.

“That scrawny-looking douche bag there is Tony”

Tony is a man with a stocky build, the t-shirt he wears pulls over his prominent abdomen.

“Eat me, Dave” Tony laughs, a loud, disgusting laugh.

“Hey, maybe someday I will” replies his friend, grabbing the glass and drinking, his eyes close as if he were tasting a fine liqueur and not a third-rate alcoholic drink in a worn-out bar.

I look around noticing the tight smiles on my friends' faces.

We have to find a way to get out of here without these bastards following us.

And even though none of us are visibly interested in the two of them, Dave continues to tell his story.

“We Met on I-95 coming out of Philly.Damn shit-show that was” Dave chuckles and then he goes back to staring at me intently.

From behind the counter Glenn grabs my hand and squeezes it forcefully, a clear signal to tell me to stay calm and play along.

Glenn laughs, thus diverting attention from me.

“I'm Glenn.It's nice to meet some new people”

“Rick Grimes.This is Hersel” Rick murmurs, passing a glass to Tony.

For a few moments a strange silence fills the air and then Dave's eyes are on me again, specifically on my boobs.

The man licks his lips, adjusting the crotch of his trousers in an absolutely disgusting way.

“How about you, sugar.Do you have a name?"

Tempted to respond with my innate sarcasm, I bite my tongue and count to ten.

With my face devoid of any emotion I force myself to speak but before I can do that Rick precedes me.

“She's my sister, she's got a name.And she's got a pretty rough husband.A man with a little problem of self-control, try to stay in yours, okay?”

This time the kindness is completely gone as he slowly hisses the words.

I shrug in response as Dave returns his gaze to me as he drinks the entire contents of his glass.

Him and Rick exchange a strange look, full of tension, then the man holds out his gun towards Rick.

“Not bad, huh?I got it off a cop”

“I’m a cop”

“This one was already dead” the man justifies himself even if I have the clear impression that this isn't true.

Then silence falls again.

The air around us crackles with a strange electricity, just like when the sky fills with clouds waiting for the storm that will sweep everything away.

Rick pours himself a glass of liquor too, displaying the right amount of nonchalance.

“You fellas are a long way from Philadelphia” he murmurs with his lips touching the edge of the glass.

His Adam's apple bobs up and down as he swallows.

“It’s feels like we’re a long way from anywhere” replies Dave.

Apparently he is the brains of the group.

His friend, Tony, simply nods and looks furtively around.

“Well, what drove you south?” Rick asks politely.

My foot begins tapping nervously on the floor as anxiety rises up my stomach.

We have to get out of here.

Glenn, noticing my nervousness, places a hand on my back, caressing it with small circular movements.

“Well, I can tell you it wasn't the weather.I must've dropped thirty pounds in sweat alone down here”

“I wish” Tony chuckles but his friend goes on ignoring him, as if he hadn't even opened his mouth.

“First It was D.C., I heard there might be some kind of refugee camp, but the roads were so jammed, we never got close.We decided to get off the highways, into the sticks, jeep hauling ass.Every group we came across had a new rumor about a way out of this thing”

Well apparently they're not doing well out there.

Right now the farm is the only safe place and we need to make sure it stays that way.

“One guy told us there was the Coast Guard sitting in the Gulf, sending ferries to the islands” adds Tony nodding absently.

“The latest was a rail yard in Montgomery running trains to the middle of the country…Kansans, Nebraska”

“Nebraska?” Glenn asks genuinely confused.

Tony nods.

“Low population, lots of fun” he adds with a wink.

“Kinda makes sense” Glenn replies.

“Ever been to Nebraska, sugar?”

I sigh in frustration, pinching the bridge of my nose between two fingers.

I'm starting to lose my patience.

“Summer.My name is Summer, no sugar.Summer” I hiss, immediately adding “Anyway, no, never been to Nebraska”

“I like you, Summer” he replies languidly and then adds “Anyway there's a reason why they call 'em flyover states.So...how about you guys?”

“Fort Benning, eventually” Rick replies indifferently even if knowing him what he passes off as indifference is nothing more than a warning.

Smart move.

Well done Rick.

Tony and Dave exchange a look followed by a chuckle.

“I hate to piss in your cornflakes, officer, but, um…we ran across a grunt who was stationed at Benning.He said the place was overrun by lamebrains” adds the latter.

Glenn and I exchange worried looks.

This means that things outside are worse than we thought.

But we can't worry about that now, our problem now is these two idiots.

“Wait, Fort Benning is gone?Shit.What will we do now, big brother?” I ask in a worried tone, turning to Rick and hoping to sound convincing enough even if my anxiety isn't entirely fake.

If Hersel is still convinced of the idea of sending us away we will be in shit.

The real shit.

Rick gives me a reassuring look.

“Sadly, I am.Oddly, the truth is there is no way out of this mess.Just keep going from one pipe dream to the next, praying one of these mindless freaks doesn't grab a hold of you when you sleep”

For a moment Dave's words seem to weigh on all of us.

Even on him.

Tony gets up approaching the counter and turning his back to us we can hear the sound of a zip followed immediately by a loud noise.

Tony is practically pissing two steps away from us regardless of anything.

Disgusting bastard.

Dave settles into the chair, spreading his legs and clicking his fingers on his gun resting on the table.

“So what…so what, you guys set up on the outskirts or something?” he asks almost with disinterest.

Jackpot, jerk.

One corner of my lips lifts.

It was more than obvious from the first moment that these two are trying to get to this point.

Instinctively I tighten my fingers around the butt of the gun I have in my jeans pocket.

I have a sixth sense that this isn't going to end well.

“That new development?Trailer park or something?A farm?” adds Tony still busy with his personal business.

We all exchange a warning look as if to imply that whatever happens we must keep our mouths shut.

The heavy silence seems to capture Dave's attention.

“You got a farm?” he asks, exchanging a long look with Rick who, without betraying any emotion, remains silent.

“Is it safe?You got food, water?” he insists with a sly look.

His dark eyes move over each of us, perhaps looking for the weakest of us from whom he can extort the much sought-after information but he is interrupted by his friend who, lifting his zip, turns towards us and exclaims “You got cooze?Ain't had a piece of ass in weeks.Excluding yours, sweetheart”

The man finishes the sentence by winking at me.

I return his gaze, filling my own with obvious disgust.

Dave scolds him with a look, a silent warning not to screw this up, and then he raises his hands in front of him with palms facing me as if he's apologizing.

“Listen, sorry my friend.City kids…they got no tact.No disrespect.So...listen, Glenn...”

Now at the limit of my patience, I come out from behind the counter, ignoring the warning glances from my friend and positioning myself next to Rick.

“We've said enough.Rick maybe it's best to leave” I say with firmness in my voice.

Rick nods slightly.

Good.

Now we have to make sure they don't follow us.

Dave stands up.

“Wait, hang on a sec.This farm…it sounds pretty sweet.How about a little southern hospitality.We got some buddies back at camp, been having a real hard time.I don't see why you can't make room for a few more.We can pool our resources, our manpower”

Rick shakes his head but before he can speak I anticipate him.

“Look, we're sorry.That's not an option”

Dave and Tony exchange a brief but significant look.

My words definitely pissed them off.

Dave puts the gun in the back pocket of his filthy jeans and then smiles at us.

“I don't see the problem” he adds, trying to convince us.

They don't know that they are playing with the wrong people.

I know this type of men, the sanctuary was full of them.

They will have no scruples.

I know how they think.

“Sorry, we can't help you” Rick's words are calm but peremptory.

There is no fucking way for what they think to happen.

“I thought, ya know…I thought we were friends.We got people we gotta look out for too”

Rick shrugs at Dave's words.

“We don't know anything about you” Rick explains simply as if this were enough to make them understand the reasons for our refusal.

Dave shakes his head and sighs.

“That's true.You don't know anything about us.You don't know we've had to go through out there, the things we've had to do”

“We too did things that had to be done, even if we didn't want to” I interrupt him, tired to play fast and loose.

I'm tired now and this makes the tension only increase.

“Oh, I know.I know, sugar.We are all the same.So come on, let's take a nice friendly hayride to this farm and we'll get to know each other”

Fucking prick.

Rick smiles.

And I swear that if I didn't know him I would shiver from head to toe.

That smile of his is dangerous.

“This is bullshit!”

Tony becomes agitated at our side while he places the rifle on his shoulder with one hand.

The man is sweating profusely, a clear sign that he is losing patience and this does not bode well.

And in fact as soon as Rick tells him to calm down the man completely loses his composure and starts screaming.

“Don't tell me to calm down.Don't tell me to calm down.I'll shoot you four assholes in the head and take your damn farm”

“Whoa” I exclaim approaching the man with the gun clutched in my hand.

Rick behind me tries to pull me towards him.

Dave also tries to calm things down by telling everyone to calm down.

I remain still in my place, feet planted firmly on the ground and the gun in front of me.

“Take it easy.Nobody's killing nobody" Dave exclaims, placing a hand on Rick's shoulder and then leaping over the counter.

I don't move an inch, I just lower the barrel of my gun and look behind me where I see Dave placing the gun on the counter and ducking behind it in search of something good to drink, continuing to repeat that no one will die today and that we are friends.

Yeah, kiss my ass moron.

Rick's hand twitches towards his gun.

An imperceptible movement but I can see it.

Without being too dramatic, I turn towards Hersel who, with a small nod of his head, lets me know that he is fine.

Glenn, on the other hand, appears much more agitated.

His haunted gaze moves quickly among everyone present and then settles on mine.

I'm good I mimic with my lips and a bit of tension seems to leave his rigid shoulders.

“You gotta understand” Dave sighs as he pours himself a glass of liquor.

“We can’t stay out there”

“I miss the part where this is our problem” I hiss giving him my full attention.

The man doesn't seem irritated by my words, in fact he smiles.

“Listen man the farm is too crowded as it is.I'm sorry.You'll have to keep looking” Rick tries to mediate, throwing at me a hard gaze, imploring me with his gaze to keep my mouth shut.

Dave nods.

“Keep looking” he murmurs with his lips pressed against the rim of the glass, taking a moment to swallow the amber liquid.

“Where do you suggest we do that” he finally replies, placing the glass in front of him.

“I hear Nebraska's nice” I respond immediately with a toothy smile.

Dave laughs in response, throwing his head back.

“Nebraska.You're so feral, I like you” he chuckles and in the blink of an eye he grabs his gun but Rick is much faster than him exploding a shot straight at the man's head.

Without thinking twice I turn my back on Rick, leaning it against his and without even aiming I fire two shots at Tony's chest.

The man doesn't even have time to react, his awkward movements in grabbing the rifle to try to defend himself were fatal.

The shots ring out like rolls of thunder within the walls of the bar.

The man's enormous body collapses to the ground while two patches of crimson red spread across his white t-shirt, adding to the dirt that adorned it.

With an empty head I let my arms fall lifeless to my sides, the gun slipping from my fingers and falling to the wooden floor with a dull thud.

I watch as if hypnotized as the blood spreads.

It's the first time I've killed another human being.

I shot my mom but she was already dead...

My hands are shaking wildly and I ball them into fists trying to keep them at bay.

When I was at the sanctuary I never had to kill anyone.

He never allowed it.

For him I had to remain clean from this point of view for as long as possible.

He never wanted me to stain my soul with one of the most atrocious acts in the world, that is, taking the life of another human being.

When I ran away, on my long journey, I was lucky enough to meet few people and I always managed to avoid them without being discovered.

But now I had to do it.

I had to.

I couldn't let anything happen to my friends.

In the fog of my thoughts I can hear the sound of Rick's boots coming alongside me.

Then another shot.

And now Tony's face is also covered in blood.

I killed a human being.

“Summer?Summer, are you okay?”

Rick's warm, reassuring fingers touch my cheek and when I force my gaze to move from the lifeless body in front of me to him I don't know what he's reading because a moment later his arms are wrapped around my shoulders.

I can feel the sound of his voice through his large chest.

“It's okay” he whispers gently without loosening his grip on me.

I feel lost.

It's as if I wanted to cry but I no longer had a soul in my body.

I killed a human being.

A living person.

I weakly push my hands against Rick's chest.

His blue eyes observe me, a wrinkle of concern furrows his face.

For a moment I see Tony's corpse in front of my eyes and a wave of nausea overwhelms me, forcing me to close them.

Stunned, I tighten my fingers around Rick's shirt.

Other steps reach us and now Glenn is also at my side, I avoid his gaze as I delicately move away from his light touch.

I feel dirty and I don't want him to get dirty by touching me.

His soul is still pure...

Mine...

I feel like I lost mine the moment I pulled the trigger.

“I…” I croak, not recognizing my own voice.

“Rick…I…”

The worried look of my close friend softens and the worry wrinkle between his eyes smoothes out.

“Is your first time?”

I nod with a shy nod, lowering my eyes to my hands that are crushing the faded cotton of his shirt.

Rick's lips rest delicately on my forehead.

I'm still waiting for the tears but they don't come.

I want to cry, wash away my sins with my tears but they just don't come.

No matter how hard I try my eyes remain empty and dry.

It's as if my own body is punishing me for my reprehensible actions.

You killed another living being, you deserve to suffer by keeping it all inside.

Moving away from everyone, I head towards the door, deliberately ignoring the blood of the man lying at my feet which slowly spreads across the floor in a large dark and dense puddle.

I reach the door observing the outside.

In addition to our car there is another, certainly the car of the two unfortunate people who are now lying lifeless on the floor.

The devastating silence roars loudly in my ears until the vet's voice snaps me out of my horrible thoughts.

“Let's head back”

And although until a few minutes ago I wanted nothing more than to go back to Daryl more than anything in the world, now the very idea terrifies me.

How will I be able to look him in the eyes?

How will he still see me as the wonderful person he saw in me until this morning?

I feel like I should stay here.

My place is here in the midst of death, the same death I feel in my heart.

Behind me I hear my friends' footsteps approaching but before they can do anything else I see lights across the street.

A car.

“Car.Car!Get down” I exclaim lowering myself while the others imitate my same gesture.

After a few moments the car stops and parks right in front of the bar.

The sound of the doors opening is followed by the sound of footsteps.

“Dave?Tony?”

Shit!

Someone came looking for those two bastards.

They were right after all, they were not alone.

“I'm telling you.I heard shots”

“I saw roamers two streets over”

From the voices it seems to understand that there are three of them.

Damn.

I exchange a quick glance with Rick and Glenn, both of whom are on the opposite side of the door while Hersel next to me squeezes my shoulder with his fingers.

The three men talk to each other trying to find out the whereabouts of their friends.

We clearly hear their footsteps along the sidewalk as they argue with each other, ordering each other to be quiet and continue searching.

Rick gets up peering from behind the curtain then, remaining crouched, we approach each other.

“Why won't they leave?” Glenn asks in an agitated tone.

For the first time I look him in the eyes again.

“Would you?” I ask him.

And even if my friend doesn't answer me I know what he's thinking because it's the same thing we all have.

None of us would ever leave the others.

“We have to leave, we can't stay.They will find us.Let's head out the back and make a run to the car”

Nodding we try to move but sudden shots stop our every movement.

“What happened?” asks one of the strangers outside.

The answer doesn't take long to arrive.

Walkers.

Shit.

The situation seems to get worse moment by moment.

The men outside continue to argue until they come to the conclusion that their friends will definitely be in the bar and so a moment later their footsteps inexorably get closer.

Rick and I immediately point the gun at the door and when it opens Glenn rushes towards it, closing it, pressing his back against it.

Now they know we're here.

“Yo, is someone in there?Yo, if someone in there, we don't want no trouble.We’re just looking for our friends”

I shake my head vigorously at Rick.

We must remain silent and wait for them to go away.

If we engage in any kind of discussion with these people we already know how it will end.

And even if my hand trembles I already know that I will do what I have to do if necessary.

“We don't want no trouble.We're just looking for our friends.If something happened tell us.This place is crawling with corpses.If you can help us not get killed, I'd appreciate it” the man repeats once again.

Rick puts his hand to his forehead, fighting against himself, but in the end I can see the moment he gives in.

And then he speaks.

“They drew on us!” he screams.

The footsteps outside are getting closer again.

“Dave and Tony in there?Are they alive?”

No, they aren't.

Despite the darkness, my eyes immediately find the man lying on the floor.

The man I killed.

I killed a human being.

I close my eyes trying to ignore the turmoil stirring inside me.

I can't distract myself now, not now.

I will have time for this, now I have to focus on the present.

We need to get out of here and possibly do it alive.

“No” Rick replies.

Outside the voices are agitated, talking to each other.

Some want to leave while one of them doesn't.

“They drew on us!They give us no choice!I'm sure we've all lost enough people, done things we wish we didn't have to, but it's like that now.You know that.So let's just chalk this up to what it was.Wrong place, wrong-” Rick shouts again but without being able to finish because a hail of bullets hits us.

The windows above our heads shatter, forcing us to step back.

Rick quickly gets to his feet, shooting through the broken glass and telling us to run away.

I grab Hersel's arm and, remaining crouched, we follow Glenn towards the back.

Hersel and Glenn take cover behind the counter while I get stuck behind a column when a bullet whizzes past my ear, splintering the wall protecting me.

I'm panting heavily as I check the magazine of my gun, I only have four shots left.

The gunfire around us seems to stop so I lean forward trying to figure out where Rick is and if he's okay.

I find him loading his rifle.

“Hey!” he shouts outward.

“We all know this is not gonna end well!There's nothing in it for any of us!You guys just...just back off, no one else gets hurt!”

When no one answers Rick nods at me and I know my time has come.

Without wasting time I rush towards the back door and enter the back of the bar.

The old stairs creak under my boots, making my heartbeat skip a beat.

Trying to make as little noise as possible, I approach the door that would signal our salvation but the silhouette of a man appears from behind the glass and a moment later the door handle moves.

Instinctively I shoot, sending the glass shattering.

Three more bullets.

“Summer!Summer!” my friend's worried voice reaches me from the other side of the room.

Keeping the gun pointed at the door I assure them that I'm fine.

Nothing seems to be moving abroad.

Maybe I scared him and he ran away.

Or maybe you killed him.

You killed another human being.

A noise behind me makes me snap like a spring.

I turn around with the gun drawn in front of me and find Glenn with his hands raised.

Behind him Hersel.

Glenn moves my gun from in front of his face.

I exhale deeply.

“Shit, man.Sorry!Sorry!”

I close my eyes trying to calm down.

My goodness, I could have shot my friends!

“Rick wants me to try for the car”

I shake my head.

No.

I can't let Glenn go out there.

“I'll go” I exclaim, ready to stop any protest from him.

I load my gun, trying to block out the two men's animated protests from my head.

I have three shots, I can do it.

I have to do it.

“Summer!”

“No, Glenn!We will talk about sex discrimination another time.I don't give a shit if you feel like a gentleman right now.You will stay here, protect Rick and Hersel.End of the story”

Before I can open the door I feel someone grab my wrist.

When I look at Glenn's face, his eyes are two hard and unreadable mirrors.

“Don't bullshit.Don't be the hero.You get the car and come back here.If things go to shit, run away.We'll find a way”

“Glenn…”

“Just…Just don't die, okay?”

“I won't” I promise him solemnly, leaving a quick peck on his cheek and disappearing out the door.

Outside at the moment everything seems to be quiet so I cautiously walk along the sidewalk that runs alongside the building but I don't have time to walk even ten steps before a shot rings out behind me.

I take cover against the wall and when I turn around another shot rings out in the air.

Glenn shot my attacker.

His chest rises and falls rapidly as with a shaking hand he lowers the rifle.

The man on the ground scream in pain and if we don't silence him he will immediately attract his friends but I can't stop now so I move forward hiding behind a dumpster.

After a few moments I hear Rick's voice.

“Summer?Are you hurt?”

“No.No.I'm good” I whisper.

The man reaches me crouching next to me.

“It's all right.The car's right there.We're almost home”

“Okay”

My voice is shaking, I try to clear my throat but to no avail.

That ball of anxiety and horror is still there weighing down my chest.

We're almost home.

Yeah.

I want to go home.

I want to see Carol again.

I want to see Daryl again.

Only at the thought of him my tears seem to return.

Because I need him.

Daryl was right.

As long as we are together everything will be fine.

Daryl will help me with my pain, he has already healed my soul once.

I'm sure he will do it again.

And again if I need it.

I just need him now.

I sniffle trying not to make too much noise.

Rick wraps his long fingers around my shoulder squeezing it hard.

“I'll take you home, little sis”

The shadow of an amused smile on his lips.

It's absurd how naturally he passed himself off as my brother to protect me.

“I know, big bro”

The man on the ground continues to scream in pain.

Too loudly.

Too fucking loudly.

“Let's go” he urges me but as soon as we get up other shots reach us forcing us to retrace our steps and hide.

Suddenly a car stops on the other side of the road and the man behind the wheel starts yelling that the place is quickly filling up with walkers and that it's best to go.

I lean forward a little to understand who he is talking to and I notice that on the roof of the building opposite there is a boy with a rifle, he must be just over twenty years old, who, invited by his friends, jumps from the roof and disappears from my sight.

Immediately afterwards an inhuman scream reaches us and the car skids off.

“Get Hersel and Glenn” Rick orders me, running towards the screams.

A group of walkers is approaching so shouting at my friends to follow me we run in the same direction as Rick.

The walkers don't follow us too busy devouring the man Glenn shot.

After a few moments the screaming stops.

Making sure the two men are following me I catch up with Rick.

When I arrived, the scene that appeared before me was terrifying.

The boy has impaled his leg on a metal spike, his screams make me shiver while his desperate crying only attracts other walkers.

“We have to go now!” Hersel shouts.

The boy cries even harder.

“I'm sorry, son.We have to go” Hersel murmurs with a heartbroken look towards the young man.

“No, no, don't leave me, please”

His plea tears my heart apart.

It's not his fault that he ended up in this mess.

Nowadays we are willing to do anything to survive, even joining a violent group.

I know something about it.

And in this moment I understand Rick's hesitation in wanting to help the boy and Hersel's determination in wanting to leave.

I can't choose and I can't take sides.

“We have to go!” Hersel reiterates as Rick shakes his head.

“We can't leave him here” replies the latter.

Glenn fidgets next to me.

“Rick, this guy was shooting at you!”

I am struck by his words.

“Glenn, he's just a boy”

But my friend doesn't even give me an answer.

Nervousness arises around us pitting us against each other.

“This place is crawling with walkers!” Glenn shouts while in the distance we can hear the walkers approaching.

Every minute is precious.

“Hersel, what chance do we have of saving him?” I ask the man, ignoring Glenn's almost betrayed look.

I know he is convinced that we are wasting precious time but too many people died today.

If we even have a chance of saving him we have to try.

“The fence went clean through.There's no way we can get the leg off in one piece.We're not gonna get that leg off without tearing the muscle to shreds.He certainly can't run.He may bleed out”

Shit!

Thing Summer, thing!

Meanwhile, Rick and Glenn tell the boy to be quiet, trying to calm his scream.

Then an idea.

“Hersel, can't we just take the leg off?”

At my question the boy begins to scream even louder.

I approach him pointing my gun at his face.

“Listen man, do you want to live?” I spit the words between my teeth, angrily.

I'm tired and out of control.

The boy is terrified by my crazy expression, so he whimpers and nods weakly.

“So shut the fuck up!Do you understand?”

With my eyes fixed on the boy I try to soften my gaze by trying to be at least a little kinder.

"It will all be fine.We won't leave you here just hang on, alright?”

He nods but his gaze remains haunted as Hersel lists the steps to take to amputate his leg.

The man takes off his shirt, knotting it as if it were a tourniquet around the boy's leg.

Rick joins me, pushing a hand against the boy's chest to force him to lie down.

Around us the grunts are getting closer and closer.

Glenn and I exchange a knowing look, splitting up to cover both sides.

He is the first to shoot and I follow closely but having only three bullets there is very little I can do.

“Rick!We have to move” I shout at him.

“I'm out of ammo.Glenn, how's it going?”

The delivery guy fires a couple more shots.

“I'm almost out of ammo” he replies.

Shit!

“Rick!”

I catch up with him while he and Hersel try to cut off the boy's leg.

“Hersel do it now!” Rick is yelling at him but the man shakes his head in defeat.

“There is no time” the vet replies.

Rick, after shooting a walker behind us, drops his rifle and, grabbing the boy's leg, forcefully removes it from the fence.

After an inhuman scream the boy faints.

Rick and Glenn put him in the car.

Hersel and I sit with him in the back seat periodically making sure he's breathing.

The journey continues in a surreal silence and when we reach the farm it is already morning.

I don't remember much about the return journey, it's as if my mind has turned off, excluding any sound, any word, anything that happened in the previous hours.

I feel numb, in my body and in my mind.

And it is with the same state of mind, with the same numbness, that I watch Rick and the others get out of the car.

The man hugs his son and his wife.

In their hasty and excited gestures I can see all the worry evaporate and be replaced by a love so immense, so tangible that it takes my breath away.

I see Maggie run to the car and throw her arms around Glenn's neck as Hersel instructs Patricia on what he needs and what she needs to prepare.

And I…

I sit next to Randall.

That's his name.

I watch his chest fall and rise slowly as small gasps leave his lips.

I look at my hands, placed in my lap, dirty with his blood.

The voices outside the cockpit are just confused murmurs but among them I can clearly hear heavy footsteps until the door on my side opens.

“Ya good?”

His voice unleashes a whirlwind of conflicting emotions within me.

When his fingers touch my chin I move away, turning my head the other way, focusing my gaze on the boy's mangled leg.

The blood continues to soak Hersel's once white shirt relentlessly.

“Summer?”

My name rolls from his lips wrapped in a spiral of worry but despite this I can't look him in the eyes.

I don't feel like myself and I don't want him to see me that way.

Daryl doesn't push any further, just crouches beside me waiting for me to be ready for him.

From the other side of the car someone approaches to take the boy away.

I don't have the strength to look who they are and after a few minutes they all disappeared inside the big house.

Everyone except me.

And Daryl.

The man doesn't let out a breath, he remains motionless at my side.

After minutes or hours I find the strength to speak again.

“You should reach the others” I murmur, lost of any emotion, of any feeling.

The words come out in such a soft whisper that I'm afraid he didn't hear me.

But I know that's not true.

The archer remains motionless at my side.

Not a breath, not a word.

I feel his eyes boring a hole into my face, even though I can't see him I feel his eyes on me.

I peek in his direction and it's just as I imagined.

His beautiful blue eyes are there, intently staring at me.

In his face there is not even a shadow of what I had imagined.

There is no anger, no disgust, oh no...in his eyes there is only so much concern but also so much relief at me coming back.

Come back to him.

And all this kills me.

I would have preferred for him to yell at me, for him to scold me for my recklessness, for disappearing without telling him anything.

I would have accepted anything but this.

Not this.

I feel like I don't deserve his gentle soul.

I look back at my hands, Randall's blood coagulated between my fingers.

The same fingers that pulled that trigger.

The same fingers that marked the end of a life.

I killed a human being.

With a sudden movement of my arm I push Daryl angrily, forcing him to stand up and make room for me while I get out of the car.

Shocked and without a specific destination, I walk away from the car and head towards the opposite side of the house.

The hill that leads towards the trees at the edge of the property extends in front of my eyes and so without having really decided my feet take me in that direction.

“Summer!” the archer grunts trying to reach me.

I snort, speeding up my pace.

Why can't he understand that I want to be alone?

His large hand grabs my wrist, forcing me to stop.

He stays behind me, granting me at least this.

I don't want to see his eyes and he understood this.

“Wha’ happened?”

“You should reach the others, Daryl”

My voice cracks as I say his name.

The same name that until a few minutes ago kept me away from my own demons now seems to push me further and further towards an abyss from which I can't see a way out.

“Wha’ happened, my sunshine?”

My heart skips a beat.

My sunshine.

He thinks about me as his.

And I want to be his.

But…but I feel so dirty…

I killed a human being.

“Wha’ happened?” he repeats but this time letting all his desperation towards my stubborn silence shine through his words.

What happened...

Happened that I love you and I feel like I don't deserve you.

Here's what happens.

But I will never tell him this.

Never.

Daryl Dixon is all I have and I will always protect him.

Even if it is from myself that I will have to protect him.

“Mind your fucking business, Dixon” I hiss angrily, yanking my hand from his grasp.

Daryl lets me go like he's burned himself and when I start to walk away I don't hear his footsteps following me.

I don't have the courage to turn around.

Because even though this is what I want, I can't handle the pain in his eyes.

I'm a monster.

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