#also stuff the military has done in real life

[scribescrawls]

On a more silly note, imagine the High Guard after the whole killing Sentinel thing happened/banishment and a few weeks later call a meeting with Optimus and they go “hey so I know we’re at odds at the moment but are we ever going to get payed for the last 50 cycles?” cause I mean technically I don’t think they were ever officially fired so much as declared dead to the general public and secretly being hunted down during that time. Do they go up to Optimus and are just like “so I get that we don’t really work here anymore but like can we still get our severance pay and our backlog of paychecks?” Cause I’m pretty sure since they were military the government was paying them before the whole Sentinel betrayal thing and any funds any of them had has probably been seized by the state (aka Sentinel during that time) or frozen sitting somewhere in account of being presumed dead. Does Megatron not want to have this meeting but the entire High Guard are grumpy about it like "no I want to get payed! I want my stuff/money back!" so now he has to sit across from Optimus in the most awkward meeting after their fall out as Starscream shouts across the table negotiating if they still qualify/are entitled for the Cybertronian equivalent of military/veteran pension for their previous cycles of service.

Cybertronian Civil War on hold due to the nightmare of bureaucracy and paperwork because tracking down at minimum 73 different case files of each High Guard member and getting them all in order when probably half of the information was purposely destroyed by Sentinel means it will probably take a while. How many times has Shockwave and the rest of the High Guard have to sign documents to declare "yes I am alive" "no I did not fake my death to commit tax fraud". Or dealing with banks and other organizations going "please provide proof that you are indeed Starscream." Starscream going "I'm literally Starscream and standing in front of you what other proof is more clear! You are literally looking at a photo of me on the datapad!" "Apologies, but unless you have x, y, z document I am afraid we cannot simply take your word that you are Starscream. If you are missing these documents please fill out these thirty forms as alternative verification of identity". Also imagining Thundercracker going "hey do you think my buy five get one free drink stamp card still works. I've been sitting on that free drink for 50 cycles…"

Funniest thing if Shockwave was a senator before joining the High Guard and there was a small period of time where he actually was declared dead before it got cleared up back in the day when the Primes were still alive, but now they can't find the paperwork that cleared up that it was an error and he was still in fact alive so now he's been declared doubly dead.

Shockwave: It's document 37C!

Elita: Repeating it for the fifth time will not change the fact that it does not exist!

Shockwave, done with being declared dead: It exists! It's added every time my taxes get filed each cycle! Did I suddenly imagine the last thousands of cycles of my life!

Elita, losing her own temper: There is no document 37C! Listen here Blinky, I can easily resolve this matter by getting you declared dead for a third time for real!

Optimus stressed and trying not to cry: Maybe we should call for a break in the meeting...

When the break is over no one can find Optimus who has decided to play hooky from his responsibilities because he'd tired and feels like he's going to lose it dealing with all the sudden responsibilities of being leader of an entire planet. I like the idea that it's Megatron who finds him. Megatron going "if I have to suffer through these meetings so do you" (he was secretly also ditching the meeting and accidentally bumped into Optimus because the place is technically their old spot that they sometimes went together, both thought it would be abandoned and no one would find them there). It's awkward, there are hurt feelings on both sides, but maybe they slowly get to talking and at least commiserate how much they hate paperwork. Also funny if they find out they both also have to resolve their own "declared dead by Sentinel" paperwork considering he said they both died after the Iacon 5000 lol.

Also I think it would be funny if these meetings drag on for so long that Optimus is just like instead of commuting back and forth from the surface to Iacon every day just stay here in the city it will save time. Banishment temporarily rescinded. Even more funny if they also have to deal with the Quintessons so half of these meeting turn into war meetings to deal with and fight the Quintessons off their planet where both sides are like "we're not on the same side!", but also eventually have to work together to win. So it's basically an officially we're not on the same side, but all actions say otherwise lol. I like to think Bee likes to hangout with Soundwave during meetings and finds him so cool, and Soundwave actually likes listening to Bee yap finding him endearing.

They eventually realize that it would be easier (and less paperwork) to just reinstate the High Guard and at this point so much time has passed that they've basically been doing their old job anyway as they fight the Quintessons together. Banishment permanently rescinded for all parties involved. I like to think megop over the course of these meetings and fighting together against the Quintessons make up. Things can't go back to the exact way it was between them, but that doesn't mean they can't rebuild something new between them. I like to think both groups have differing ideas of how to lead and how to deal with situations, but I like to think eventually they get to a point where they can compromise and work with differing ideas depending on what's best for the situation at hand similar to the 13 Primes who probably had conflicting and contrasting personalities and approaches but were able to use these differences to work together and make them stronger as a united front.

Cybertronian Civil War avoided through the sheer slog of paperwork and bureaucracy.

[papasmoke]

"Zionism as a political & military project is innocent, it's just those horrible Kahanists responsible for all the bad stuff, also it's not a genocide, and really almost everything Israel has done has been defensive & even justified, oh and they're surrounded by savages, also America should keep giving Israel money and bombs, but really I just want peace and mourn the loss of innocent life on all sides, but i support whatever death toll & infrastructure annihilation Israel says is necessary to get the hostages back, also we HAVE to stop Hezbollah and the Houthis and Hamas by any means necessary, but it's really just so complicated and unless you're directly impacted you honestly shouldn't comment on the matter at all or really even have an opinion on "palestine" which by the way isn't real, im a liberal btw"

[ifishouldvanish]

The idea of Olrox being from Cholula specifically makes me so insane. Like would he have identified more as Mexica? Or as Tlaxcaltec? Would he have been loyal to the Tlaxcaltec and allied with the Spanish only to get screwed over like his Mohican lover did in the colonies? Would he have done so thinking he could get the upper hand in the end just like Mizrak/Emmanuel thought the Order could with Erzsebet?

"He thinks the devils he manufactures will be enough to destroy her when the time comes. What do you think? Do you think he's right?" - S1E4

Even after the fall of Tenochtitlan, nobility from all over the region would have been sent to Cholula to get the blessing of Cholulan priests for their legitimacy. How might this have fueled his disdain for nobility?

Olrox: "I prefer my blood blue."

Drolta: "Maybe you do things differently in the new world, but over here we don't feed off the wealthy. The locals will start to grumble." - S1E5

As a Mexica citizen, this disdain could come from resentment toward sumptuary laws, the increasing lack of socioeconomic mobility during Moctezuma's rule, and frustration with how he handled the Spanish... But as a Cholulan sympathetic to Tlaxcala, there's so much more???

It could come from frustration with leadership that defected from the very people who helped them elude Mexica rule in the years before the Spanish conquest. Anger at a decision that economically obliterated the Tlaxcaltec, who became completely surrounded by Mexica member-states? Regret at how much it cost them to 'overthrow' the Mexica? Grief at how this kind of political/military opportunism helped lead the wider indigenous population to its demise?? Like the latter is so much more thematically ripe for a show tackling colonialism and imperialism imo???

"This one? He was just an opportunist, following the Messiah because she's powerful." - S1E4

I mean!!?? Think about how the implications of all of this... *gestures wildly* stuff would lead him to adopt such a cynical, morally ambiguous worldview? This sense that it's all doomed, that he's not strong enough to fight it? Resist and fall to your enemies, or work with them only to lose parts of your identity in the process? Think about how the brutality of the Cholula massacre recontextualizes eurocentric perceptions of the brutality of flower wars and ritual sacrifice??? How it would leave you with anger and pain and an unyielding need for justice?

"Little boy Belmont. I know that feeling. That pain, that hate, that burning, unendurable need for retribution." - S1E1

Think about how the Mexica Empire had adopted Huitzilopochtli (war, sacrifice) as their primary patron deity, and the Tlaxcaltec Mixcoatl/Camaxtli (the hunt, fire)... Yet Olrox's form seems to be based on Quetzalcoatl (wind, knowledge, rebirth, among other things)–the deity the great temple at Cholula was dedicated to.

A handful of mesoamerican deities are associated with serpents/have names ending in '-coatl', but Olrox's serpent form clearly has a feathered crest—the 'quetzal-' in Quetzalcoatl.

But Olrox's abilities also seem to include lightning/thunder, which are associated with Tlaloc, who the Cholulans seemed to have adopted as their central deity some time before the Spanish conquest.

Quetzalcoatl is only associated with storms sort of tangentially, through his aspect as the wind god, Ehecatl. The Florentine Codex refers to Quetzalcoatl-Ehecatl as sweeping the roads to make way for the rain and the thunder.

Think about how in Tlaxcaltec accounts, Cholula–being a sacred city–had no real military to speak of and depended on their gods to protect them???

Mizrak: "There's only one God. Just one. That's the only thing I'm sure of. And I've spent my whole life serving him, fighting for him. That hasn't changed, and it never will." Olrox: "One god... And you think he can protect you?" - S1E4

Like... What does it all mean???? 🫠🫠🫠

Agshsjdkdkfll *screams into a pillow* I am so excited for season 2 but whatever happens Cholulan Olrox is canon in my heart y'all

[bts-hyperfixation]

What do you think the boys would've done on their last nights with their significant others before joining the military?

Some of these are last nights, others are full days. Also only Taes has explicit smut mention, although most mention sex in some fashion

Please send me asks to keep me motivated while I'm off work! Thirsty thoughts, Most likely to, reactions, life updates, and general gibberish welcomed!!

Namjoon: 

I think Namjoon would've wanted a quiet night. He was probably stuck at work trying to finish plans on that Instagram account that's still posting and maybe fiddling with the album we know he started. But he would have tried his hardest to put it down and return home by nine to spend time with his loved one. His partner would be waiting for him with a simple takeaway on the table and maybe a TV show they had been watching together queued up. They'd stay cuddled on the couch for the longest time. They'd maybe fall around but not get anywhere (Something Namjoon regrets by day 3 in the barracks), maybe they intended to have sex one last time before he left but neither wanted to acknowledge it was actually the last time. He would talk about how this was ridiculous, it's not like they'd be 18 months without one another, just a couple of months at a time is all... And then he'd get sad and introspective. They'd fall asleep on the sofa because going to bed would bring their last night to an end and Namjoon doesn't want to willingly relinquish that time. 

Seokjin: 

I think he hired out a restaurant he and his partner like, maybe even their first date restaurant. The partner actually panicked that Jin was going to propose the night before he left and was ready to yell at him if he pulled out a ring. Jin sets up multiple proposal cliches throughout the evening giving his partner a heart attack each time while he acts nonchalant about it, pretending he doesn't know why they are getting worked up. This is stuff like a jewellery box on the table (It's a necklace), A gem in the champagne (It's tiny ice), He kneels by the table (and ties his shoe). They take a long walk by the river after dinner, his partner increasingly exasperated but still very fond. He finally does pull out a ring, but he insists it's only a promise ring and the real ring will be given to them on June 14th 2024 (Doesn't want to share the anniversary). The evening probably ended with some very slow, heavy eye-contact, love-making

Yoongi:

Disclaimer - I'm not 100% sure if Yoongi had to go anywhere for any length of time... but this is written as if he were doing the same as the other boys. 

He cooked dinner, something he is gonna claim is simple, but he took all day to make it. He also lay the table with a white tablecloth, dimmed all the lights and set out candles. Flower petals lead you through different stations of the apartment. First appetizers and cocktails on the sofa so his partner can talk about their day, then to the table for the main course, to the bathroom where bubbly and strawberries await next to a warm bath for two, and finally to bed for dessert. Which actually meant dessert, there's a snack platter of sweets in the centre of the bedspread and a movie queued up on the TV. the movie wasn't really watched... but the thought was there.

Hoseok: 

I feel like Hobi made an entire day out of it, he set aside time to make sure he only had his significant other to focus on and made sure his SO did the same so they were uninterrupted. Then he locked them into their apartment, only opening the door to bring in food deliveries. The day starts with lazy morning sex. Then breakfast. Then lazy shower sex. Then maybe some TV time, where his hands remain firmly on his partner as if they are going to disappear the second he lets them go. The SO convinces him to go for a walk at lunchtime, they hold hands the entire time. Hoseok has them sit in his lap when they return home. Just wants to be permanently close. The third round of sex is definitely more driven, like he has a point to prove and doesn't want his SO to forget what exactly it is they are going to be waiting so patiently for. 

Jimin: 

Jimin took his SO back to his home town a couple of days before. Maybe spent some time with his family in Busan, had a very nostalgic craving for his parents cooking and took his SO along for the ride. They do stuff he liked to do as a kid, visiting places that he wouldn't be easily recognised. He's anxious, and jumpy, and clingy a lot of the time. He keeps asking his partner if they are going to be okay when really it's his own insecurity. Jimin had someone drive them in a nice car back to Seoul in the early afternoon so they had the evening together, they probably fooled around in the car as he tried to keep himself occupied. He let them hold his hand while he had his head shaved, needing the familiar reassurance. He took a break to show Army his hair, but the SO is hiding behind the camera. Then the evening is spent quietly, wrapped together to enforce the fact that they aren't going anywhere.

Taehyung: 

He came up with so many different plans for what he wanted to do that by the time the day came around he hadn't actually implemented any of them. And sure he is Taehyung of BTS, if he had made a couple last minute phonecalls he could have made anything happen but he decides the lack of plans is exactly what was meant to be. He runs on pure unplanned whims and ends up taking his SO to absolutely anywhere that pops into his mind in the most chaotic fashion. They go to the movies (Something everyone's already seen so no one else is there) (they may spend most of it making out in the back). They go to an arcade (An old buddy of Tae's owns it and makes sure they get an hour uninterrupted). They eat lunch at the SO's favourite restaurant. Eventually, they go home and Taehyung spends hours between his lover's thighs, trying to immortalise the taste of them in his brain before he no longer has the access he so desperately craves. They probably also have a lot of sex. He falls asleep insisting on cockwarming, convincing his partner the UTI will be worth it with the Tata mic face. 

Jungkook:

It takes a while for his SO to convince him to do anything at all because "What's wrong with in my arms in my bed forever?" (And he's right, nothing wrong with that and if his SO don't want it I volunteer). He convinced them to snuggle back down with him at least three times until lunch rolled around and they insisted he get up with them to go somewhere. They never end up leaving the house. Every time his SO goes to put on a shirt, Jungkook grabs it and throws it somewhere it can't be easily recovered. There was one in the sink with the dirty dishes, one mixed with the already dirty laundry, and another hanging from a light fixture they would both need a ladder to reach. Eventually, the SO has to relent because they won't have any shirts to say goodbye in the following day. So they succumb to his wishes (Although they make him go out to fetch food first). He holds on to them possessively throughout the day, pulling as much of them against him as is reasonable at any given time. I fully believe Jungkook would crawl into the skin of an SO if he thought it was possible. 

[basiliomagnus]

This quote made me think, how do you think tastes and styles of cooking differ between the tribes? Each party member has their own style of food, but Eupha and maybe Heismay are the main ones who we could extrapolate things about their culture from.

I think that paripus food definitely uses the most spices. Rhoag food uses the least

oh im so glad at least one person asks me this i've been thinking like. too much about tribe culinary profiles lately

so to start a while ago i tried to group all the principalities into their climates and ecosystems right. aside from the fact roussainte are fuckin everywhere from what we know:

oceana has a healthy fishing business and is mostly woodland, through they have a small stretch of arid land from central euchronia

central euchronia is high in desert and (presumably) arid soils, though for the purpose of sustaining grand trad let's say that south euchronia contains fertile wetland

montario is extremely mountainous and cold BUT it also has that patch of thick forest though a lot of the fauna there are like. venomous and spit fire

virga island

so when i think about the food part of their cultures i tried to keep in mind where a majority of the tribes seem to be located and how that would have impacted their culinary development, assuming that the population has been relatively consistent since the annex war. there's also their individual values to consider (VERY LONG UNDER CUT)

clemar are like, white brits, so i think assuming they have similar food to irl england is a good starting place. thanks to central euchronia having the desert climate it does however i think mostly in oceana do they have fish as part of their meals and in grand trad its mostly a delicacy. a lot of local dishes that are made up of what can be found lying around, nothing too complex, but due to the nature of where grand trad Is i think they lack a lot of real "desserts" that aren't considered a luxury (sugar is expensive)

roussaintes NEED high protein meals to sustain the amount of physical work they do, so i think meat and leafy green vegetables are a staple in most dishes. lentils, tofu (soybeans are actually really protein dense), nuts, the like. roussainte in montario probably have a lot of spice in their meals for cold weather but to also manage their appetite during military work.

rhoag are a tricky case but hear me out: i feel like a lot of their food takes after other tribes due to how long they live. it's probably customary for a rhoag to wander around a lot in all the time they have to live, so a lot of what they cook ends up influenced by all the other tribes in different ways. as for methods i imagine that they focus on recipes that don't require much physical labor (spending most of your long life in your geriatric stage probably isn't great), so a lot of soups, pan fried stuff, grilling, etc. is probably shared around.

ishkia are almost 100% spice fiends, if you're like me and assume they have bird-like traits in a lot of places they probably have much higher spice tolerance than most other tribes, in addition to their climate requiring warmer meals. a lot of farmwork is probably done down in the lush forest area because mountain farming is historically a bitch and a lot of Brain Food can't be grown in the cold. heavy "brain food" presence in casual meals (fatty fish, coffee, collard greens). a lot of roots, mushrooms, and foragables that grow in cold climates (snowpeas, watercress, acorn, etc) at high altitudes are common, though this sounds horrible bc you cant really Get them anywhere else in euchronia.

nidia because of the Everything read to me as having a high dependence on magla-rich food and stuff that grows low to the ground. a lot of root vegetables (carrots, potatoes, turnips) and berries (straw, blue, the likes) that can be infused during the growing process. lot of emphasis on eye health on that note (leafy greens, citrus, probably raise a lot of chickens for eggs in their villages). theyre very fae folk inspired to me so i imagine a lot of their delicacies are an important part of their culture (muffins, candied flowers, tarts, yknow)

paripus probably take a lot after recession foods given their status and wide-spreadedness, a lot of cheap options like rice, beans, grains, fruits and meat dried. however i also see them as having a large amount of "leftovers" or "community" foods yknow? stuff like hunters stew or bread pudding or salads, generally stuff you can make with what's left over after a big meal and you can share with other people. i think they probably have a lot of "loose" recipes with easy replacements or things you can swap out if you don't have them.

eugief society is analogous to japanese culture if you look at the architectural styles of heismay's village and his clothing so they probably have a lot that's taken from there haha. fish, savory foods, big on spices and they probably invented some form of oil frying. i imagine that the area between oceana and euchronia is heavy in rice production due to the hot and humid climate, on that note

mustari are very analogous to southeast asian/pacific islander culture! lot of rice, game, seafood, emphasis on pairing sweet with salty or savory. i imagine a lot of steamed or roasted foods. mustari that came to the capital or montario probably ended up having to mix traditional styles with the ones present there, esp due to the lack of ingredients that were only capable of being found on the archipelago (side note: here's a nice article about this stuff that i found interesting)

as for elda theyre like. they remember shit from the old world. i know this probably just means they understand how to cook meat the best and get how to properly process certain foods with what cooking material but what if will came out and showed people how to make french fries. imagine

[hibiscusseaart]

ok so i have some Tobirama thoughts cuz i watch Naruto rn and over analyzing everything

but whatever i need this character study to get my characterisation of him straight.

So basically I just thinking over what an ass Tobirama is towards the Uchiha clan

and a disclaimer: i love Tobirama he's my fav, I just want to understand him better and PLEASE share your own opinions too! i feel like im making a whole paper on him or smth

Tobirama was basically "I separated Uchiha in their own compound from the main cast of the village and ordered them to make a police force (and everyone knows how people "love" cops, especially in military settlement) not because I hate them. They're just dangerous and prone to mental instability (thinking of Madara much? Dude if ppl feel love intensely, and you don't, it fucking doesn't mean they're mentally ill). But I know some good Uchiha (Kagami who was under his command?? and Itachi who massacred the whole clan for the village????) so I don't hate Uchiha."

Like okay, he doesn't hate hate them, but he IS prejudged af. As much as I like to read stories where he isn't like this and kinda more forgiving, in canon he is an ass.

And honestly it makes sense for Tobirama to be like that (I'm not defending him, I'm just trying to lay his thought process down). Like he fought with Uchiha for most of his life and he doesn't have pink glasses on his nose like Hashirama. He knows they're dangerous and he learned to mistrust them since they're enemy.

And he has his own theories about Sharingan, but basically he thinks that bitches are so sensitive, they can't handle a little hurt and loss.

I honestly think that he's wrong, like I think Sharingan awakens by high levels of stress (maybe cortisol levels shoot up suddenly?) Tobirama is only one man who tried to understand that and he barely interreacted with Uchiha personally.

Ok i just found this but bitch really came up with this theory based on rumors. Dude, please stop spreading misinformation.

Though we don't know their medical progress at this point, so maybe he really didn't know? Like he didn't have enough medical knowledge to get this theory straight. He has his special interest in making jutsu and you don't need to know people well enough. You just need to know how to kill them effectively.

Also, dude, if you (or maybe Senju in general) don't react as strong as the Uchiha, it doesn't mean they're mentally ill or cursed.

Oh and Tobirama thinks he's done GOOD for Uchiha. I mean his brother thinks it's slight for the Uchiha to get separated, living near prison and being avoided by village since they're the police force, but for Tobirama it's a job well done cuz it helped the village. He's a practical man who doesn't even think about feelings like that.

I think with Konoha he kinda played the game like SimSity but IRL. Optimised and used the resources he had to do the best working village. You don't think about sims' feelings when you make them pay higher taxes or make them live near dumpster just cuz you think it's okay and they will manage, right?

Before it was his brother to care for this kind of stuff. But then he died (how the fuck btw? I hc it was a disease but damn in some timelines he died when he was like 42 but damn WHAT could've killed The God of Shinobi) and Tobirama stayed alone. I assume his family wasn't much help and they had a 1st war near, so Tobirama had to work fast and efficient.

just a funny strip "You don't know him like I do"

I think Tobirama was also offended at Madara since he tried to destroy the village he put a lot of work into (lets be real, Tobirama doing most of administrative work is basically canon, not a headcanon, it sits way too right)

Plus I think Tobirama like many people was impressed + scared of Madara. Like he's crazy strong and ofc you're afraid, I get it. But Madara is an exception, not the rule. He's just a freak of nature + I think being Indra reincarnation had its influence too. It's not the whole Uchiha clan, but Tobirama judges them like he'd judge Madara.

Maybe he's a bit paranoid. Understandable since being a ninja and it's what keeps you alive, but this lack of trust really showed through all of the history between Tobirama and Uchiha clan.

Okay maybe hc territory, but I think Tobirama doesn't get emotions much in general. He's very autistic coded and, being on the spectrum myself, I can get where he's coming from. I trained my empathy cuz not having one is considered wrong. Tobirama probably didn't cuz no one told him to or he didn't consume this type of content in his childhood (i trained myself by cartoons lol). He cares, but he doesn't get feelings and makes these kinds of theories, based on rumors (damn dude fact check please).

Maybe since he doesn't get emotions much he's used to depend on other people in this regard? Like people start saying these rumors and he watches himself and is like "Yeah that seems possible" especially since Madara got his big drama time about Izuna. He has big feelings = has strong Sharingan. It is plausible.

I dont think Tobirama wanted to check it for sure, since 1) WHO will let the White demon near their precious eyes to help him understand how they work; 2) it's not his point of interest. he had village to run, jutsu to make, kids to teach. the bitch was busy and it's only 24 h/day

so yeah Tobirama had his reasons but he's an ass lol. like dude did start this chain of Uchiha slander and then when they were massacred he was like "Oh boohoo they self destructed what a pity" DUDE 😭

[bravo4iscool]

Hii, this this the person talkin about chubbier Simon! Give me a sec and let me set the stage for you,

Simon Riley x 141!reader whos on military leave to cope after a particularly hard mission. Reader finds a way of coping and expressing their love to simon through the art of cooking for him constantly. (i come from largely a guyanese and indian family so everyday theres always good food on the table) So we all know this man can eat ALOT (he needs to maintain his girlish figure after all😌lmao) So i can just IMAGINE him eating all the stews, curries, roti and rice (or whatever culture/country reader comes from)he can get his hands on! He would have such an appreciation for food from working in the military so long and having limited food he could eat. So going from a man of pure slabs of muscle to slabs of muscle but WITH softer abs he gets a little self conscious but he sees the benifits that hes getting alot with a great meal everyday and how his reader ogles him everyday hes starts to like the change. (Theres actually more benefits for having muscle and fat than just pure muscle!! When you see bodybuilders with just pure muscle the muscles in their whole body are constricted causing cramps and alot more muscle pulling in day to day life compared to heavy weight lifters who many not look as muscular but can lift much more while still having a strong core and overall more power)

Sorry to ramble and run but this has been rattling my brain. Have a great day and remember to drink water♡

I ABSOLUTELY LOVE THIS OMG!! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS ASK!!! i‘m sorry i wasn’t able to answer it any sooner, i‘m in my last three weeks of school and it‘s kinda stressful🥲. i hope you can understand…

as someone who is russian-german i totally understand the whole food thing😭 (thats why reader will be russian-german lol. it‘s the only culture i really know about the food and all that (at least i think i know about the food🧍🏼). also, i do not know the english names of the food so i‘ll be using the terms i know.)

i hope you like this!!

(masterlist)

REQUESTS/ASKS OPEN!!!

„y‘cooking too good f‘me,“ simon mumbles as he puts his arms around your waist and pulls you into his chest. „‘m loosing all my muscles.“

you chuckle and turn your head to look at him. „that‘s not true! you‘re just developing a little more fluff.“ you smile and turn again to focus on the food you‘re preparing. „besides having muscles with a layer of fat is way healthier than just muscles.“ you can feel simon nod with his head rested on yours.

„what‘re y‘makin‘?“

„pelmeni,“ you answer, skilfully sticking the dough together so the meat would stay inside while you cook them. „i haven‘t made them for you till now.“

simon lowers his head so it‘s beside yours and examines the dough and meat in front of you. „thought we a’ready had ‘em two weeks ago?“

you shake your head and lick your bottom lip, trying to concentrate. „that were manti simon. they are made like…mochis. pelmeni are cooked in water.“

simon doesn‘t say anything and buries his nose in your neck. „t‘boys will laugh a‘me when we return,“ he mumbles as his lips ghost over your skin to leave little kisses.

„they won‘t,“ you protest and slightly slap his arm. „if anything they will be jealous!“ you dust your hands off and turn around in his arms. he looks at you and you start to frown. „you are not…insecure, are you?“ when simon just blinks at you without answering you take his face into your hands.

„you, simon riley, do not need to be insecure because you’re eating good. you’re not getting fat or losing muscles. if anything, you’re only getting healthier because the army food is total garbage and you’re finally getting some real food,“ you try to explain, withstanding his gaze the whole time. „don‘t beat yourself up over stuff like this.“ your voice is gentle as you caress his scarred face with your thumbs. „you deserve something good life. let me be that something.“

silence follows after you‘re done talking and you could swear you saw a tear in simon‘s eye but then he blinks and it is gone. „i don‘t deserve ya,“ he whispers, pulling you close again. „i don‘t deserve ya…“

„oh, but you do,“ you smile as you pull him down to press a gentle kiss on his lips. „you do deserve me and you also deserve my food.“ you put your arms around his waist and hug him. he does the same, keeping you close to him. he rests his head on yours and closes his eyes. he just wants to savour this moment…

[cruel-simmer]

So I've never done anything like this before and idk what possessed me to do it now but here we are I guess! Each generation of this challenge is inspired by a Doctor Who (2005-) companion! Some generations are more strict or packed with things to do than others. Same with how closely they stick to the life of the companions - some things are accurate, some stuff is loosely based Currently there's 11 generations with the final one being Dan Lewis plus three bonus generations. I will be updating this challenge with future companions (Ruby etc) whenever their time on the main show comes to an end. I will also be making a TS3 version of this as soon as I can that I will update this post to include a link to Check out a spreadsheet checklist version of the challenge HERE. It is simplified slightly for ease so if you plan on doing this challenge make sure to read through the full requirements below first so you don't miss anything! If you do this challenge and plan on posting it I'd love if you used #tscompanionlegacy so I can see it LAST UPDATE 10/06/24 (keep reading for details)

UPDATES 10/06/24

Complete Yaz generation overhaul

Three bonus generations (Jack, River, Nardole) added

Misc typo corrections

Changed Martha generation degree

Some generation colour switches

Heirs don't need to be the same gender, sexuality etc as the character their generation is inspired by

Normal or long lifespan is recommended

Use as few cheats as possible

All asterisk (*) mark generation requirements are optional

As your heirs age up, give them the required traits in the order that they're listed

Each generation has a colour (assigned mostly based on an outfit that the companion wears in the show) and you can use it as much or little as you like

There is a connection between each generation in their descriptions but you could ignore them and do the legacy in a random order if you wanted to

If baby specifics aren't mentioned anywhere in the generation rules assume you can have as many or few as you like as long as you have at least one to continue to legacy

Basically all of this is just a guide, you should just do what you want in order to get the most fun out of this challenge

You aren't sure what you're doing with your life. You have a tiny home, a rubbish part-time job and no real plans for the future. You're starting to think that's what your whole life is going to consist of until one day you begin to notice the new town you've moved into might be called StrangerVille for a reason. People are acting weird and keeping secrets and no one seems to wants to sort it out so you decide the person to do that will be you. This hunt for answers gives you new purpose and kick starts a love for all things science and aliens.

Aspiration: StrangerVille Mystery Traits: Jealous, Outgoing, Generous Career: Retail Employee, Scientist World: StrangerVille Colour: Pink

Live in the StrangerVille trailer park at least until your aspiration is complete

Work a part-time job as a Retail Employee

Complete the StrangerVille Mystery aspiration before becoming an Adult

Join the Scientist career ASAP after completing aspiration

Create a portal and visit Sixam

Have at least one alien baby with an alien

*Max the logic skill

*Complete the Alien collection

*Reach the top of the Scientist career

If growing up with a Scientist parent, an Alien sibling and the stories of how your parent freed StrangerVille taught you anything it's there's a lot of stuff out there that needs finding, containing and keeping track of. So you decide to make it your job to ensure that happens! It's not your whole life though. There are other things important to you as well, like love and adventure, and you do your best to make sure your job doesn't take over and leave no time for those other things.

Aspiration: Academic Traits: Genius, Romantic, Self-Assured Career: Military (Covert Operator Branch) World: Oasis Springs Colour: Dark Red

If you are an Alien, be stealthy about it in public/at work

Get a Psychology degree

Fall in love with someone who loves someone else more

Go on at least four vacations in your lifetime

Marry a co-worker

Have one child

*Max the research and debate, fitness and logic skills

*Reach the top of the Military career

*Complete the Academic aspiration

Your young adult life doesn't start out as being what you thought it would be - there's an incident with a partner who turns out to be Evil, you can't find a full-time job, living with your parents long past when they envisioned you'd be living with them starts to break down your relationship - but somewhere down the line it starts working out. You find passion in a job you're good at, a stable relationship that makes you happy, and a child you dedicate your life to protecting. You do still get under your parents feet but they don't mind as much now that you're making something of yourself.

Aspiration: Super Parent Traits: Mean, Loyal, Family-Oriented Career: Retail Employee, Tech Guru (Start-Up Entrepreneur Branch) World: Oasis Springs, then Any Colour: Light Brown

Live with your parents until they die and if you want to move out of Oasis Springs you have to wait until they die to do it

Have a rocky relationship with parents from YA onwards until you get married

Play the lottery regularly

Get into a relationship with an Evil Sim and be the one to propose to them

Either get left at the altar or have your partner die before you get married

Find a new partner and marry them

Join Tech Guru career only once you're dating your future spouse

Have one child but only after marriage

*Max the programming and parenting skills

*Reach the top of the Tech Guru career

*Complete the Super Parent aspiration

*The beginning of the next two generations are quite same-y so if you don't feel like playing both of them you could just choose one path - Amy or Rory*

Despite your loving family growing up and the best friend turned significant other that worships the ground walk on, you can't help but feel there's something missing and you want more than the cozy little life that they want. You pretend for a while - there's a whirlwind proposal, wedding and pregnancy - but it's not long before it get's too much and you start putting yourself before the people around you. You don't just want to be some small town writer. You want to be a celebrity, and you want to live like one.

Aspiration: World-Famous Celebrity Traits: Creative, Noncommittal, Self-Absorbed Career: Writer (Freelance), Actor World: Chestnut Ridge then Del Sol Valley or San Myshuno Colour: Orange

*Max childhood creative skill

Have two BFFs growing up and start dating one of them as a teen

Move to Chestnut Ridge with your partner as soon as you become a YA

Get proposed to ASAP after moving out with your partner and get married within a week

Cheat on your partner once between getting engaged and married

Get pregnant on your wedding night and name your baby after your other childhood BFF

Get divorced as an Adult and have a negative relationship with your ex that you actively make worse

After the divorce, move to either Del Sol Valley or San Myshuno (with your child) and get a job as an Actor

Don't pursue another serious relationship

*Max the acting and writing skills

*Reach the top of the Actor career

*Complete the World-Famous Celebrity aspiration

Your parent points out to you how your life is shaping up to be like theirs - they had two childhood BFFs too! and started dating one of them! - and all you can think about is how badly that worked out for them and how much you want it to work out the opposite way for you. You want a big happy family, a picket fence and maybe a dog to go with it. You know just wanting it isn't enough to make it happen though so you put in work, work your more than willing to put in, to show how dedicated you are to this kind of life.

Aspiration: Soulmate Traits: Genius, Romantic, Socially Awkward Career: Doctor World: Henford-on-Bagley Colour: Light Blue

Have two BFFs growing up and start dating one of them as a teen

Move to a new world with your partner as soon as you become a YA

Propose ASAP after moving in with your partner and get married within a week

Get pregnant on your wedding night and name your baby after your other childhood BFF

Have chickens, cows and/or llamas

Go on a date with spouse at least once a week

Have at least three biological children

Adopt at least one baby/infant

*Complete the Village Fair Ribbons collection

*Max the handiness skill

*Reach the top of the Doctor career

*Complete the Soulmate aspiration

For the most part your life is average - you're a minimum wage teacher with a dead parent and your significant other is a co-worker - but then you meet a mad Scientist who you try to just stay friends with and tell your partner not to worry about but ultimately you're too drawn to them to keep away...

Aspiration: Fount of Tomarani Knowledge Traits: Bookworm, Flirty, Perfectionist Career: Babysitter, Education (Professor Branch) World: Tomarang Colour: Mustard/Gold

Have at least one parent die of something that isn't old age

Get a part-time job as a Babysitter while a teen

*Reach top of Babysitter career

Date a fellow teacher as a YA

Make friends with a Scientist and eventually cheat on your partner with them

Leave your partner for the Scientist

Have at least one day/night out in every world

Be enemies with your Scientist partner's best friend

Have your Scientist partner make at least two clones of you (it's up to you what you do with them)

Never get married

*Max the research and debate skill

*Complete the Postcards collection

*Reach the top of Education career

*Complete Fount of Tomarani Knowledge aspiration

For a while you think a Fast Food employee is all you're destined to be which is fine you guess but you were just expecting more. On a whim you apply to university and before long you're moving in, making friends, falling in love and changing your whole life!

Aspiration: Friend of the World or Good Vampire Traits: Cheerful, Foodie, Outgoing Career: Fast Food, Astronaut (Space Ranger Branch) World: Britchester, Any Colour: Purple

Get a Fast Food part-time job as a YA

Don't start university until after reaching the top of the Fast Food part-time job

Live in a Britchester shared house while at university

Become best friends with one of your professors

Make a vampire friend who later becomes an enemy

Become a vampire

Date someone at university but break up with them by the time you graduate

Get a Physics degree

Go on at least two dates with two different Sims

Go on at least two vacations with your university professor

Reconnect with your ex from university as a late adult and give up your life as a vampire

*Max the charisma, rocket science and fitness skills

*Complete the Friend of the World or Good Vampire aspiration

*Reach the top of the Astronaut career

You're known for two things - making food and making jokes. You don't go anywhere without a sacked lunch and you always have a dad joke on hand. You can't imagine why it takes you so long to find the true love of your life. And why do they have to be gone so soon?

Aspiration: Master Chef or Angling Ace Traits: Dance Machine, Glutton, Cringe Career: Culinary (Chef Branch) World: Brindleton Bay Colour: Brown

Take a sack lunch with you whenever you go out or to work

Have at least one child

Teach your heir child to ride a bike

Don't meet the true love of your life until you're an elder

Throw a big wedding party (and dance a lot)

Have your spouse die before you do (either via an 'accident' or you can just cheat it so that your spouse is a few days older)

*Max the cooking and gourmet cooking skills

*Max the fishing skill

*Complete the fish collection

*Reach the top of the Culinary career

*Complete the Master Chef or Angling Ace aspiration

As a child your parent taught you to ride a bike and it kick started your love of sports. As a teen you became Clumsy and it knocked your confidence. As a result you pursue a job in Social Media (which you definitely enjoy but it's not quite your childhood dream of being an Athlete) and spend some time not doing many active things at all for fear of failure. Over time you find confidence in yourself and decide to dive in the deep end to get back into sports by hitting the slopes in Mt Komorebi.

Aspiration: Extreme Sports Enthusiast Traits: Active, Clumsy, Bro Career: Manual Labourer, Social Media (Internet Personality Branch), Athletic (Professional Athlete Branch) World: Any, *Mt. Komorebi Colour: Teal

Have a poor relationship with your non-heir parent

Get a part-time job as a Manual Labourer as a teen

Have a basketball hoop

Don't work your on aspiration until you're at least mid-YA

Reconnect with your teen BFF as an Adult

Meet your significant other in Mt. Komorebi

*Move to Mt. Komorebi

Once your midway through you aspiration, you can quit the Social Media career to become an Athlete (but you don't have to)

Have at least two children

*Max the video-gaming or athletic skill

*Max the skiing, snowboarding or rock-climbing skill

*Complete the Simmi collection

*Reach the top of the Athletic or Social Media career

*Complete the Extreme Sport Enthusiast aspiration

You love your job but you can't help but want more. One day you meet someone who throws into a world of potions and magic and might just give you the more that you've been wanting.

Aspiration: Spellcraft and Sorcery Traits: Gloomy, Loner, Ambitious Career: Detective World: Any Colour: Red

Don't have any friends as a teen

As a YA, become BFFS with a high ranking Spellcaster and fall in love with them quickly but don't make a move (kiss) them

Become a Spellcaster

*Quit job as a Detective

Have a film night with your sibling/s once a week

Move in with your BFF

Reveal your romantic feelings (and have at least one baby baby) with your BFF late in life

*Complete the Magical Artifacts collection

*Reach the top of the Detective career

*Complete the Spellcraft and Sorcery aspiration

Helping people (and animals) has always been in your nature so no one is shocked when you move to Sulani as soon as you are able to pursue a job in conservation to not just help the few people around you but hopefully the entire town. And you do most of it with a dog at your side.

Aspiration: Friend of the Animals Traits: Good, Dog Person, Nosy Career: Conservationist World: Sulani Colour: Black

Always have at least one dog

Be BFFs with every dog you have

Be left at the altar as a YA

Marry someone else that you've known for a while as a late Adult

Donate to charity at least twice a week

Max the pet training skill

*Max logic, handiness and charisma skills

*Reach the top of the Conservationist career

*Complete the Friend of the Animals aspiration

Aspiration: Serial Romantic Traits: Kleptomaniac, Flirty, Materialistic Career: Criminal (Oracle Branch)World: AnyColour: Dark Blue

Have a child that doesn't live in your household

Have at least four close friends

Drink a Potion of Youth a few days before aging into an Elder at least once. If you're already starting on the next generation before this point then keep this heir in the household until they've drank the potion and then after that you can move them out if you want to

*Max the mischief, programming and charisma skills

*Reach the top of the Criminal career

*Complete the Serial Romantic aspiration

Aspiration: Archaeology Scholar Traits: Bookworm, Romantic, Self-Assured Career: Writer (Author Branch)World: AnyColour: White

Get a Language and Literature degree

Don't become close with your parents until you've got your degree

Spend more time exploring the jungle than writing and explore as much of the jungle as possible

Have multiple long term partners before finding 'the one'

Have at least two spouses (with the final spouse being 'the one') over the course of your life

Have a small wedding for your final marriage and invite only your immediate family

Go on a date night with your final spouse at least once a week

Don't move in with your final spouse (or any previous partner) until you're a late Adult

*Die and have your spouse bring you back to life

*Max the archaeology and writing skills

*Complete either the Ancient Omiscan artifacts or Omiscan treasures collection

*Complete the Fossils collection

*Complete the Archaeology Scholar aspiration

Aspiration: Master Maker or Fiver-Star Property Owner Traits: Childish, Maker, Paranoid Career: Freelance Crafter World: Not Henford-on-Bagley, then Henford-on-BagleyColour: Rusty Orange

Decorate your home with things you fabricated

Be a Landlord

Be a Freelance Crafter

Create and activate at least one Servo

Marry a Sim from Henford-on-Bagley and then move there

*Max the fabrication skill

*Max the robotics skill

*Complete the Master Maker aspiration

[senkothesquirrel02]

My friend and I are creating a fanfic and we’d like some advice.

So I saw a while ago the meme about the smallest dragon with 1 single coin as a hoard as well as the tumblr story about it and I thought……….. why not make it ghoap? We made it a fantasy incorporated with humans (not to be mistaken as a hybrid au, this is full on supernatural au with some humans) It kinda has been an add/adhd brainrot story where we just indulged the chaos. By no means are my friend and I done writing yet and we will hopefully post on AO3. We won’t spoil the plot yet. (Yes it’s brainrot and hyper focusing but it’s fun) Also my friend told me to say I’m the one responsible for angst bits.

Here’s what we have so far for stuff/memes we added, advice/ contribution of memes or ideas greatly appreciated:

Soap and Ghost povs

Absolutely no idea how military works so working with idea of modern knights/bounty hunters

COD MW (2022) full crew including Farrah/Alex from their raid mission (briefly mentions a ValeriaXGraves crackship…….. I blame Glitch for the explanation of it to which it sounds very real #samesnake)

Cod zombies element 115 and Aether and Mr. Peeks

MW3 ‘23: only using Price and Sheppard end credit (‘23 canon does not exist)

Codm lore: only the tointine/couteau with the armor of Gideon, mention of kilo mythic, Templar and ghosts dynamic, added Sophia, Dame but playing with the fact she’s crazy and in Tontine (she tried raising Sophia to be her predecessor but there was hints in lore her training was very brutal like Damian Wayne’s but she’d possibly allow the shit the Tontine was doing like experiments), and tempest, also used the bit about Sophia working as Makarov protege. No mention of Shepard but will use basis of what happened in Winter War/Final Snow comics between Ghost and Temp as an “eye for eye” scenario, not trying to save Russian from merc sent after him— clearing up loose ends for Shepard)

With addition of mythic Sophia it kinda leaves plot idea of her 💀 then coming back due to the Valkyrie design.

COD Ghost comics (Codm is using cannon of 09 MW for ghosts character/most of lore) Mama Riley but she’s a dragon trapped by human Dad Riley thanks to enchanted item/trickery (yes we fixed the plot hole so she’s still seen as a good mom)

Mama Riley also becomes a patron of the lost and lonely children in the after life and beats the shit out of Dad Riley in afterlife (Sophia accidentally gets adopted)

Burnette ghost

MW ‘09 (using Roach, elements of price in gulag, Makarov being a🧚‍♂️)

Roach being embodiment of chaos

Mention of DC Comics, more specifically Damian Wayne and Talia Al Ghul

Marvel Deadpool/Spiderman dynamic (only for comedic relief and multiversal stupidity),bloodstone family, and mysterium

Looney Tunes types stilupidity (Wile E. coyote like traps)

Arcane aesthetic (steampunk/elegance from Piltover but wild magic is more accepted and grown wild in plants, small places/ towns more medival setup) and Vander (pre his first💀) with the bar

Mythology from Norse, Celtic, Dutch, Greek, Egyptian, and some D&D influences for creatures

Use of Spanish, French, Gaelic (might not be best translation)

NikPrice

GhostSoap

AleRudy

FarrahAlex

Dragon Ghost (crow mentality for shiny but coin is main part of hoard) Elf Soap (gets adopted by large creatures *cough* owlbear *cough* and has bad luck and Arson/pyromaniac)

Dragon Ghost Nik Price can shift to small version dragon, human, or large sized dragons (ghost likes being small 90% of time but price makes him be human…… this leads to soap thinking ghosts a baby) while in small dragon can’t talk in “human” tongue so squeaks (will have inner monologue tho found in italics)

HC soap would be friends with reaper (or Donn Celtic god of death) and they’d be like “you’re not supposed to be dead, stay alive for one consecutive month please!” And soap will try to befriend every creature (leads to trouble)

Adding Atlantis (ghost would be a sea/land *atlantian* dragon because from research says the island supposedly was directly between Canada and uk part of Atlantic) as well as the utopia paradise of Avalon and hopefully a mythological citadel if I can find one (let me know if y’all know one, hopefully same idea as the Atlantis or Avalon, might make one linked to dragons or shadowrealm idk)

Dragon Nik/Price (Nik Batman and robin adopts Ghost. Price begrudgingly agrees)

Fae Laswell (no one screws with her)

Fae Gaz

Eldritch Roach (yes he will hide in vents, no one knows he eldritch besides Laswell, has shadow abilities due to ‘09, will be feral gremlin)

Do not know what to put AleRudy as or Farrah Alex (advice please)

Dame as human Witch

Temp/Sophia werewolves (using the idea of being able to tell who is shifter by a certain eye color, can’t remember who wrote that but it’s from tumblr

No smut but will have slow burn/makeout (accidentally made a steamy scene during Roba time but I won’t say where)

Will have angst (mostly directed to ghost, mentions of time with Roba including *that* Christmas, adding how he was hunted by monster hunters and being sold out on op then seperated from 141, being used in ritual by rusalka, and other bits) and heavy gore

Heavy swearing also

Flashback of memories (good and angst ones)

4th wall breaks (both are call outs)

D&D style side quests/tasks

Anyone saw despicable me movie where one minion drank something and turned into glow stick? Using that idea but it’s berries and ghost is impromptu glow stick

Friends idea “hear me out, bow with bell on small dragon ghost”

“He’s 7 he can’t drink” “what am I supposed to do with him?!”

Accents leading to mispronounced name (ghost to cost for soap)

Pavlov’s ghost in to “sitting pretty” at the sound of breagha when in tiny dragon form…….can and has happened when human(Gaelic for pretty)

Idea of a tiny predator being able to bring down big animal, like 10x their size (from black footed sand cat hunting style)

Tiny dragon scruffing (yes acting exactly like kitten)

“Stop telling everyone I’m dead!” (Pertaining to soap taking a most likely fatal contract from a drunk promising big payout and everyone presumes he’s dead and the drunks being yelled at because of it)

Soap sketching Ghost whenever possible

Garlic bread goblin meme of ARSON!!

Personal hc of Sophia and ghost having sibling dynamic after she stops trying to kill ghost for vengeance. Sophia being chaotic as well (she and roach might become friends…. Who knows).

“My death was greatly exaggerated”—Sophia (and kinda Templar)

Community hc of ghost and Farrah having sibling energy

“Welcome to the shit fuck hell festival.” Quote from a fanfic

“I plead the fifth” meme (not the song, the one of them accidentally admit saying they did something stupid and backpedaling)

“Why are you here? Five words or less” (something along the lines of) “out. For. A. Walk. Bitch.”

Ghost Sophia bonding over their traumas. Implied mention of Farrah and Ghost had bonded over their traumas

Literally everyone wants to beat the shit out of Dame (if you know Codm lore you’ll know why)

Gave Sophia the call sign rouge because in the contract business (and family tradition) they need call signs

Shadow company setting bounties on Soap (let’s just say soap blew up their complex on an op)

Working with idea for supernatural entities having fast regeneration and only being sent to limbo when receiving fatal injury so body can properly heal

Oh no he’s hot turns to “your telling me this dragon was a fucking 10 all along but none of you told me? I was carrying a damned 10 and treating him like a baby?!!!”

“I’m just saying the Canadians were onto something with the Geneva checklist—”—Nik as it pertains to a monster hunter who caught Ghost

[“Laswell, he was going to sell it(whelp) to Sinombre. If we use those tactics we can get the name of Sinombre!”—Nik

“As much as I appreciate your enthusiasm. That would cause the UN to be hounding us and I don’t need that headache. Hey, PRICE DON'T YOU DARE USE THAT CAR BATTERY!”—Laswell

“But Laswell…….” —Price

“Just because the gulag used it on you doesn’t mean you do it to other people!!”—Laswell

“But-”—Price

“Where’d you even get the battery— did you take it out of my car?”—Laswell

“No, fine I’ll return it later.”—Price

“Better do it.”—Laswell] differing ideas for interrogation (‘09 iykyk)

Laswell being the only one to understand tiny dragon squeak/draconic besides said dragons

Idea of tiny dragon ghost being constantly yeeted

Air jail (oil lamp for tiny dragonghost when he acts like spicy little shit)

HC: They need to hide coffee from ghost or the little shit will be like hammy the squirrel from over the edge or twitchy for hoodwinked

“I can’t mansplain, manipulate, or make wife my way out of this……… Manslaughter it is.” —Nik or Ghost

[“What’s that small wood thing in the shape of a bag pipe?”

“An ocarina Johnny?”

“Oh! You mean the instrument that little elf guy plays in Zelda? What’s his name, Jerry or buddy?”

“It’s Link you uncultured swine. Never dis legend of Zelda again or ill sick Demise’s curse on your ass.” Ghost having too much knowledge about video games]

[on-a-lucky-tide]

Do you do a lot of research for your fics? Military terms/processes, fighting methods, legal crap w the big words and all that. Or does it come naturally? I must say I am impressed!

Not a whole lot? I do have to look up guns and shit because I am absolutely not a gun nut by any stretch of the imagination. I think any of my knowledge has just kind of seeped in over the years. To give you an idea:

I fight myself so I have that background, although I'm more a "I'm gonna hit them really hard and if it lands I'm fuckin' chuffed" kind of fighter rather than one with huge technical knowledge, my uncle was a Group Captain in the RAF so I absorb some stuff through osmosis (he did court martials/legal stuff for the MOD, big lover of wine and cheese, met my aunt when she was working for MI5 in Cyprus), I did a fair amount of research when I was writing a novel-length Modern AU in another fandom. I have @piranhaincaps to help me with SAS ranks because they work slightly differently to standard forces (like resetting for NCOs), I was a cadet for a good few years as my parents hoped the discipline would beat the queer out of me, I've read the Wiki, played the games, I can absorb knowledge very quickly.

I'm also just painfully British and we're good at bullshitting our way through life with an accent.

I think that covers it.

But, thank you. I try my best. Don't always get it right, but I self soothe with the fact that not even the in-canon lore is consistent with how the British military/SAS actually works, because CoD is an American-made game, and huge swathes of it is a modern AU for the real world.

I think I've done more research for Nikolai's dialogue than anything else.

[creature-wizard]

Unwelcome Ozian copied Fritz Springmeier and Cisco Wheeler - see for yourself!

For those who don't know, Unwelcome Ozian is a conspiracy theorist who has been on Tumblr since the early 2010s, presenting himself as a Project Monarch survivor and a sort of guide for others who believe they experienced the same thing. However, a number of people who put their trust in him report that he has engaged in predatory and harassing behavior.

Fritz Springmeier and Cisco Wheeler are two conspiracy theorists who wrote a number of highly influential books together in the 1990's. Whether or not you've heard of them, if you have heard anything about Project Monarch, I promise you that at least some of that information goes back to them. Springmeier and Wheeler made a number of absurd and hateful claims - such as that the Antichrist would be enthroned in the year 2000, that many immigrants were secretly Manchurian agents, and that Al Gore was a real vampire who carried around a briefcase full of blood.

I actually read their three books on Monarch programming (They Know Not What They Do: Illustrated Guide to Monarch Programming Mind Control, The Illuminati Formula Used to Create an Undetectable Total Mind Controlled Slave, and Deeper Insights Into The Illuminati Formula). When I finally got around to taking a look at the work of Unwelcome Ozian, I immediately recognized it as the same stuff Springmeier and Wheeler were pushing. It wasn't just the exact same kind of claims - it was often the exact same text, with some very minor alterations.

Here are some examples of obvious copying:

Chainless Slaves: The foundation of trauma-based programming is fear. A deep spirit of fear cripples a subject spiritually and emotionally.

Deeper Insights Into The Illuminati Formula: The foundation of trauma-based total mind-control is fear. A deep spirit of fear cripples a person spiritually & emotionally.

Chainless Slaves: Subject’s who have been given a designated purpose in life will have their genealogies hidden. They will have programmed to have a cover life to insure they will not be detected.

From The Illuminati Formula Used to Create an Undetectable Total Mind Controlled Slave: The Illuminati create mind-controlled slaves who are to function within the Illuminati hierarchy. These slaves will usually have their genealogies hidden, and will be created to have excellent cover lives to insure that they are not detected.

Chainless Slaves: Programmers will make a point of having the unborn subject hear the voices of individuals who will play a role in the programming. The subject may already know the hypnotic voice of one of their programmers at birth.

Deeper Insights Into The Illuminati Formula: This is why the Illuminati has made a point of having the unborn child hear the voices of people who will play a role in the trauma and programming of the child. The child may already know the hypnotic voice of one of its cult programmers at birth.

Chainless Slaves: The mind links together a series of mental processes. These links are called K-lines. Much of what the mind does is activate various K-lines so the mind can focus its conscious thinking.

Deeper Insights Into The Illuminati Formula: The mind strings together a series of "cognitive mental demons" that is a series of mental processes--similar to how a computer programmer writes a program. These strings have been called K-lines. Much of what the mind does is simply activations of various K-lines (a habitual ways of doing things), so that the mind can focus its limited conscious thinking.

Chainless Slaves: Another technique is to alternate leniency with harshness. When punishment is partnered with kindness, the effect is devastating and disconcerting because the subject looses the ability to predict what is going to happen.

The Illuminati Formula Used to Create an Undetectable Total Mind Controlled Slave: Another trick is to alternate leniency with harshness. This trick is done in the military also, and has been worked with success by the Chinese government upon the people of Red China. When leniency is alternated with kindness, the effect is devastating and disconcerting because the person looses the ability to predict what is going to happen.

Chainless Slaves: Alien Parts for contact, bonding w/ aliens and acceptance of mock alien invasion.

The Illuminati Formula Used to Create an Undetectable Total Mind Controlled Slave: Alien alters for contact, bonding w/ aliens, & acceptance of mock alien invasion

Chainless Slaves: Angel (imitation) Parts for divine messages, these may be seen as angels

The Illuminati Formula Used to Create an Undetectable Total Mind Controlled Slave: Angel (imitation) alters for divine messages, these may be seen as Spirit Guide alters

Chainless Slaves: GREEN or EMERALD GREEN. These are cat altars. They still see themselves as belonging to the cult family, and deny that they have been abused to protect their cult family

The Illuminati Formula Used to Create an Undetectable Total Mind Controlled Slave: GREEN or EMERALD GREEN. These cat altars recognize they have been abused. They still see themselves as belonging to the cult family, and deny that they have been abused to protect their cult family.

Chainless Slaves: YELLOW. These are the strong Christian alters of which there will only be a few in the System. They help serve as a balancing point to control the System as well as to hide what the System is all about.

The Illuminati Formula Used to Create an Undetectable Total Mind Controlled Slave: YELLOW. These are the strong Christian alters of which there will only be a few in the System. They help serve as a balancing point to control the System as well as to hide what the System is all about.

Chainless Slaves: Element Parts (Air or Wind, Water, Earth, Fire) for magick and compliance

The Illuminati Formula Used to Create an Undetectable Total Mind Controlled Slave: Element alters (Air or Wind, Water, Earth, Fire) for magick & compliance

Chainless Slaves: Satanic hierarchy Parts, to insure the occult part of the system is controlled and follows occult teachings

The Illuminati Formula Used to Create an Undetectable Total Mind Controlled Slave: Satanic hierarchy alters, to insure that system is controlled by Satan

This isn't even close to all of the instances of copied text in Chainless Slaves, but I think it's enough to demonstrate where Unwelcome Ozian is getting a lot of his material from.

If you're curious whether his book Rules of Programming has any copied material - I can confirm it does. I went through it a few months back and posted about it over here.

If you'd like to learn more about the origins of the Project Monarch mind control conspiracy theory, and how we know it's BS, you can check out this post over here.

[tirsynni]

There's a popular mindset that I'm seeing within fandoms right now, and it's the type of mindset which destroys fandoms and makes enjoying any type of storytelling difficult.

"Well, I don't understand why the character just didn't do this."

"If I was in that person's shoes, I wouldn't have done that dumb action."

"OBVIOUSLY, the character just should have done this."

One, if the character did all of that stuff, there wouldn't be a story to tell. Two, if the character had such a godly, clear perspective of everything and the emotional detachment to complete all of the actions, it would be a boring story. Three, that's not how shit works. That's not how stories work, and that's not how real life works.

"Why did that character run up the stairs? That was stupid of them."

Do you think they knew what genre they were in? How many horror characters know they're in a horror story? Many of them think that if they're in any genre, it's romance or something.

In that specific moment, with the known options available and no information beyond what is immediately in front of them, what option will the character take? The viewer or reader is outside the action. They can pause the movie. They can put down the book. The character doesn't have that option.

Characters within a story are also bound by the laws within that story. If they have the time and ability to think on their options, that still doesn't give them complete freedom of choice. They are still bound by specific options, with each set of options having possible positive and negative consequences.

This character has concerns about his current military operation? What makes more sense? Dramatically going AWOL with all of its possible complications and consequences or staying in line? More often than not, the latter makes the most sense to the character at the time. They think that they have the time and ability to figure everything out. They don't have the information to know just how bad the situation is.

The tragedy within stories and what often makes them fascinating to us is all of the things which binds the characters to their negative choices. A story where a character realizes they're in a horror genre and are completely willing to get the hell out of there... except they can't. Because they can't leave their friends behind. Someone who knows their actions will probably lead to their own death but truly believes that it will benefit their loved ones. Someone who keeps making awful choice after awful choice for all the best reasons and can't back out now: they've gone too far and they're confident that the next choice will make everything better again.

The best characters are the ones whose positives are balanced by their negatives. Their strengths become their weaknesses. A character's confidence becomes arrogance which leads to their doom. Someone's love becomes obsession.

And sometimes, within the frame of the story, the character can make all the right decisions and still fail. As Captain Picard says, that's life, and that also makes for an intriguing story.

I love my fix-its. I love writing how something could have changed to make a happy ending. I rarely want the canon to change unless the writer made that awful ending for stupid reasons, though, like laziness or just going for stupid shock value. Even then, the best fix-its work with the tragedy inherent in the original story.

Darth Vader survives! Now what? It's never implied within the narrative that he thought the bad guys were wrong, after all: he just chose his son over the emperor, chose love and family over the Empire. Him surviving by a change in circumstances doesn't mean happily ever after. It opens a whole new can of worms.

And honestly? Sometimes the characters having two equal choices and choosing the bad, lethal choice is what makes the story that much more heart wrenching, because they were so close to that happy ending, and it was their lack of godly perspective and their mortal limitations which led to their tragic end. That's not a bad thing!

If every character made every proper choice and had no flaws which would impair their decision making, it would lead to a boring story. It would also be jarring within the context of the story and separate the characters from their own universe, elevate them above the narrative instead of allowing them to flourish or wilt within it. It's more fun to dissect what led to those choices than to just say, "Well I would have just done this!"

[eowyntheavenger]

Hi! I saw your post on telling Americans to vote, and I was wondering what you think of posts from people from other parts of the world who are calling Americans evil for voting for Biden because of his support for Israel. I've seen a few already. They seem to be completely convinced that Americans deliberately voted for Biden specifically to side against Palestine and no other reason, and spread the general (pretty ignorant and hateful) message of "Americans are evil because of the actions of their government and because they collectively refuse to vote for a president who is good and not simply 'the lesser of two evils'". It frustrates me because they seem to think they're experts on US politics, culture, and society and have all the answers, but it also makes me concerned because it reminds me of the whole Russian bot thing from last time. Like, I'm 99% sure the people reblogging these posts aren't Russian bots (don't know about the OPs though), and they unquestioningly believe this. What do you think of this and how would you go about addressing this issue? Do you think it's possible to get them to understand how little they actually know about the US and how they're actually promoting a message that makes things worse for everyone? I've also seen less scathing posts that are just disheartened and don't seem to believe the democrats are truly better to vote for than the republicans and so it's just two sides of the same coin. To be fair, I think that sort of feeling is only further encouraged because there didn't really seem to be much if any progress made with Biden, not even back to square one after Trump moved the country so far backwards. I think most Americans really wish the elections actually had good candidates and they could pick the best of two goods, but are frustrated and stuck with the current system and don't know how to actually get to the point where there are good candidates. (Though personally I think voting for the one who isn't actively trying to make themselves a king with unlimited terms is a decent start. I can understand the frustration though.)

Hi! Thanks for the ask. This stuff worries me too. I've gotten comments on my posts like that too, telling me/other Americans that we're evil for voting for Biden.

But I've seen a much larger number of comments and posts from people outside the United States BEGGING us to vote for Biden. I literally get tags like that on my posts EVERY DAY urging Americans to vote blue. So I think that's valuable context, even if it doesn't solve the problem of the "I hate everybody who votes for Biden" crowd.

And yes, it's definitely a shitty argument on their part to claim that people voting for Biden are specifically siding against Palestine. Literally every single person I know in real life and online who plans to vote for Biden has been criticizing and protesting his policies on Palestine.

In terms of convincing the anti-voters that they're wrong, honestly, I don't know. They don't listen to reason and they seem intent on spreading despair. Some of Biden's policies have been terrible (Willow oil-drilling project), some of them have been downright evil (military aid to Israel), but I'm a rational person and I know that Trump is worse in every respect.

I've tried debating them. It's been pointless every time. They genuinely don't know how the government works, which scares me. Common takes include: 1) a genuine lack of awareness of how pro-Israel Trump and the right wing are, combined with magical thinking that a virtually unknown third party candidate can win the presidential election, 2) truly impressive mental gymnastics blaming Biden for the overturn of Roe v. Wade, and 3) continuing the mental gymnastics to blame Biden and the Democrats for anti-trans policies...

I guess my advice is to either ignore them and move on, or debunk things when you have time/energy? It's easier said than done, I know. There's nothing more annoying than someone being stupid on the internet, especially when they accuse you of stuff that just isn't true, and especially when they're spreading dangerous misinformation or voter-suppression rhetoric.

Like you, I'm highly suspicious of anyone who advocates AGAINST voting, or against voting blue. And I agree, many of these people are not bots, like you said, but I call them useful idiots, because they're doing the bots' work for them.

The one thing you said that I'm going to push back on is "there didn't really seem to be much if any progress made with Biden." Biden's actually made lots of progress on a variety of issues, and reversed some of Trump’s damage, it just doesn't get a lot of fanfare and it’s unfortunately happening at the same time as Republican gains in state legislatures and while they control the Supreme Court. But Biden and his administration have:

• invested billions in green architecture and clean energy, including making sure federal investments benefit low-income communities

• introduced new fines for companies' methane emissions

• introduced a plan to cut the federal government's greenhouse gas emissions by 65% by 2030 (that includes the military, which is a huge emitter)

• passed a huge bill for improving the country's infrastructure, including bridges, roads, broadband and more

• introduced first-ever national strategy on gender equality and equity and pushed Congress to pass the Equal Rights Amendment

• fought for women's reproductive rights after the overturn of Roe v. Wade

• put more women, people of color, and women of color on the federal bench than any of his predecessors combined

• nominated Kentaji Brown Jackson as the first Black woman to serve on the Supreme Court

• boosted funding to historically Black colleges

• ordered the DOJ to end the use of private prisons by the federal government

• pardoned thousands of people convicted on federal marijuana charges

• created a White House office of gun violence prevention

• passed the Respect for Marriage Act, guaranteeing federal rights and benefits for same-sex couples

• rolled out a series of actions to protect the rights and safety of the LGBTQ+ community, including protecting queer and trans foster youth, improving access to mental health services, and addressing the rise in hate crimes

• challenged discriminatory state bans against gender-affirming care and trans athletes

• called to support trans youth in State of the Union address and restored the White House tradition of recognizing Pride Month

• changed passport rules so that people can obtain a passport with no gender marker

• examined efforts by each federal agency to advance LGBTQ+ rights around the world

• reversed Trump's transgender military ban

• protected the rights of incarcerated trans people

• forgave billions in student debt, repeatedly, and introduced penalties for college programs that trap students in debt

• slashed bank overdraft fees

• expanded guaranteed overtime pay for millions of people

• made union-busting harder

• prevented discriminatory mortgage lending

• made efforts to expand the child tax credit, which could lift hundreds of thousands of children out of poverty

• cracked down on agriculture monopolies to support farmers and small businesses

• made it so the government is going to start taking drug companies' patents away if they don't make affordable drugs

• made over-the-counter birth control pills available for the first time

• lowered the cost of hearing aids and expanded access to them

• spent millions of dollars on students' mental health

• reversed discriminatory healthcare rules

• reinvigorated cancer research

• announced plans to replace all leaded pipes in the next ten years as well as combatting lead exposure abroad

• changed rules for how people can get aid after disasters so they can get more protection and immediate payments more easily

• introduced new data privacy rules protecting people from tech companies

• pushed the federal government to monitor AI risks

• maintained steadfast support for Ukraine in the face of Russian aggression

• maintained steadfast support for Taiwan in the face of Chinese intimidation

• strengthened ties with allies in Asia and the Pacific Islands

• pledged climate change assistance to low-lying Pacific Island countries

• literally IMMEDIATELY after being elected, Biden fortified DACA, rejoined the Paris Agreement, and ended Trump's discriminatory "Muslim ban", ended the Keystone XL Pipeline and fossil duel development in wildlife monuments, (same as last link) rejoined the WHO, strengthened COVID-19 response measures on a variety of fronts, re-included non-citizens in the U.S. census, and passed executives orders on racial equity in the federal government

And I'm sure there's more I left out.

There are also things Biden does that literally don’t make the news, but matter a lot, like funding the Postal Service, and continuing to have a State Department so we can conduct overseas diplomacy (Trump tried to defund the USPS and wants to purge the State Department and fill it with loyalists).

[twinkle-art]

Andromeda's garlean, or at least raised in garlean society, right? How'd she take the whole Varis/Anima thing in Endwalker? Or just the Garlemald section as a whole? If you've done all the EW role quests, how'd she feel about that last blasphemy?

unfortunately for her, she sure is! she was raised by her garlean mother and spent her entire childhood in the capital city so coming back to that under the circumstances that she did was, frankly, the worst experience of her life. just a profoundly miserable, harrowing time for her.

wrt to the anima stuff, i don’t actually know how strongly it hit her through the noise of every other horrific thing she was seeing, but i think the revelation that the people of her homeland had been devoured by their own nationalistic fervor nauseated her first and foremost because of how it almost felt like a foregone conclusion- a sort of “of course that would be what destroyed them” reaction that, in the face of how gruesomely it actually played out, makes her too unsettled to really feel any sort of vindication at the karmic comeuppance. mostly it just makes her sad. 

(the particular way she personally suffered at the hands of garlean fascism did little to harden her to the many, many cruelties of war she both witnessed and participated in in her capacity as the warrior of light- she has always done what she must without complaint, but she has never been able to turn off the way she instinctively sees humanity in those she cuts down for the sake of justice, knowing they’re probably a lot like the kind of people she was raised in tenuous community with. she just tries not to think about it too hard.)

of course, within the larger context of the arc, it’s ALSO pretty hard for her to view it as any sort of divine retribution when she knows not only what real, tangible person is responsible for unleashing this disaster on them, but that he all but says he did it to get under her skin, specifically. she might even feel culpable for the massive civilian casualties, if she let herself think about it for more than ten seconds. good thing there’s always something else for her to be doing!

anyways, more broadly, the garlemald arc was when her elaborate lies about being a normal eorzean girl completely and utterly collapsed under the strain of actually returning to where she came from. the psychological toll of keeping up the façade with the ilsabard contingient (though the scions, lucia, maxima, and some others have all kept her secret for a while now) And being treated by the garlean populace as a foreign invader (which strikes a nerve she was surprised to realize was still raw after all this time) And not knowing if her mother, who she had very recently accepted might’ve been a more complicated figure than she assumed, was even alive was, frankly, just way too much. the jig is extremely up. she’s taking out her anguish by cursing out some uncooperative military guy who probably reminds her of her step-father in her native language. she keeps asking everyone they meet if they know a woman named lucretia eir caecus. she’s finding any reason to avoid regio urbanissima because if she sees her old home she’s probably gonna have a panic attack. it went Extremely Bad.

the one and pretty much only spot of hope for her during all this is that it did help to get it through her thick skull that her friends like, really really love her. alphinaud and alisaie were basically glued to her side as much as they could be and each had their own approaches to trying to protect her from something that they pretty obviously couldnt. and, for what it’s worth, even as word began to spread through the ilsabard contingient that Hey I Think She’s From Here? i simply don’t think it destroyed their respect for her the way she had convinced herself it would. if anything i think a lot of them just felt bad for how much of a toll this was clearly taking onher.

…sadly i have not actually done all the edw role quests (i’m REALLY bad about doing role quests. i didn’t even do the shb ones until i made that video essay in june. and we all know i’m a huge shadowbringers guy) so i can’t comment on that but i’m sure it’s probably in line with all of this. yeah <3

[tonystark604]

Phineas and Ferb - A fanfiction idea

I have been contemplating if I should post this for a while now, but I feel like even if no one reacts, I am at least posting that for me now.

There is this Idea I had/have for quite some time now. I recently have gone back into my obsession of Phineas and Ferb and I am really hyped about the newest season coming up soon.

And I kind of see a lot of people loving on Ferb (which is totally fine, don't get me wrong). Often when I read fanfiction about their teenage life's, it's Ferb who is the more darker version, the one who drinks and would try out drugs and stuff and it makes me wonder sometimes about a certain what if scenario.

And this what if scenario has developed in a full blown hyperfixation of me right now, so I am kinda developing a whole plot for it, just for funsies for myself right now and even drew some fanart (as a non-artist so please don't judge) and I thought I might share, just in case someone else might be interested in it.

The Plot Idea:

What if, in an alternative Universe Phineas was kidnapped as a child from his family. He is still a baby when he is kidnapped and in this universe the kidnapping would also be where Phineas' real Dad would die during, because he would try to protect Phineas, but he is obviously not strong enough. (I have not settled on a reason as to why they specifically chose Phineas).

Phineas grows up away from his family, without even knowing they exist. He gets raised in a laboratory where scientists experiment on him and other children (again, not really sure yet how they picked out those children).

It's a secret organization who's goal is to cross-engineer animal traits into the children and train them as weapons for special operations that should replace humans (as half animals/half human they would not be considered humans anymore and therefore would be worth less). This organization is funded by high ranking people in the military and the government, but it is all kept highly secretive as it is of course illegal.

A lot of children don't survive this as it is a very stressful and painful process.

Phineas does survive it though. He is being cross-engineered with a Fox, because I think it fits his character.

Baby Phineas in a tank on the left and Baby Phineas being carried back into his cage on the right, he already has fox ears there. (sorry for the bad art, its just some sketches I made)

He doesn't understand what these people want from him, but I feel like, even though they hurt him, Phineas would still have his innocence from the TV Show to some extend and would try to give his best and make them like him. Because I feel like Phineas' innocence in the show is a character trait that is just purely Phineas. He is referred to as Subject 578 and truly believes that is his name in the beginning.

On the left is Phineas seeing what the scientist had done to him and on the right is Phineas being led to another testing room from his cell, they are walking through rows of other cages with other children.

With the completion of the cross-engineering Phineas training would start. At this point he does understand that some things are wrong, but he doesn't know what exactly. He knows that some children leave their cages and never come back, but he isn't sure why. He is still convinced that this is normal, but he starts to be wary of the scientists.

This is Phineas sleeping in his cage. The only thing he has is the thin blanket. Sometimes he would wave to the other children around him, but contact is limited.

The scientists would be very intrigued by Phineas. Not only because of his high level intelligence but also his resilience and his talent. At first Phineas thought that was good and would lead to them not hurting him anymore. But soon he found out that it didn't really matter what he did, he was just an Object for them.

Phineas after a few training sessions, surrounded by scientists who give him another experimental drug to make him stronger.

When Phineas training session start, that's when he would start to understand that the scientist's are bad. They hurt them and degrade them and they don't really care about them. Phineas sees a lot of the other children die. They don't survive the harsh training and environment and that's when Phineas starts loosing some of his innocence. During the training he tries to aid the other children as much as he can, often taking the blame or guiding them/encouraging them. He behaves and does what the scientist's tell him to their excitement, all in a ploy to make them trust him and get careless.

During his time there, Phineas would gather all the information he could get. He gets sent to missions with his team, mastering them successfully. He develops into the perfect specimen the Scientist's want, until one day, when he had gathered enough information and finally manages to flee. In his escape, he destroy's the laboratory and saves those that had been held there just like him. But even though he destroyed this laboratory, he knows its not over.

In his time there he found out that this organization is an organization operating world wide, funded by multiple countries that do not know of each other (with countries I mean that there are only a few people that know of it in the government and support it, the vast majority doesn't know). The children are taken from their families at a very young age, experimented on and trained as weapons, being sold to the highest bidder for special operations deemed too risky for normal humans. Phineas was one of their greatest subjects, and the organization wants him back.

However, Phineas just wants to go and find his own family, but he knows he would bring danger to them, if he would return home like this. So he makes it his mission to hunt them down, destroy the organization one by one and show the public what was happening right underneath their noses. He would travel the world to find them and dismantle them and Phineas being Phineas would still try to make the best out of every day and have fun despite the horrors he had endured. Simultaneously he would be on the run himself as well, because the organization wants him back desperately.

Phineas would be twelve, when he would be sent to his first mission. He would be fourteen, when he would escape and he would be sixteen when he would have nearly dismantled them all. The information he would gather, he would send to a Reporter he met. He doesn't trust her, but he knows that she wants the truth for the sake of her story and carrier, which is why he trusts her enough with the information he gathers. There would only be a small piece of them left and then he could go to his family, but of course his family had other ideas and the Reporter he found wasn't as selfish as he thought.

Linda had never stopped searching for Phineas even though the police had already said it was futile. She would have still met Lawrence in this universe and married him. Ferb, who never had Phineas and therefore no one who would understand him on this deep level, would be forced to speak like every one else. Candace would be super overprotective of Ferb, as she had lost one brother once already. Ferb's inventions would never be as big as they were on the show, but he would still do some, only that they would be more helpful gadgets. He would still be friends with Isabella, Buford and Baljeet and he would still have Perry. Linda would have told Lawrence about Phineas and Lawrence would have gone on in supporting her in the search for Phineas. Linda and Lawrence would also be open about it to their children, but would be careful to not put their trauma on them. Ferb would have the same bedroom as he has on the show, but he would often imagine how it would have been growing up with a brother. Candace and Ferb would also have a very deep bond and often talk about Phineas late in the night, when the parents where already asleep. Even though Perry never knew Phineas and it wasn't his fault, since he came into the family later on, he would still feel guilty about having failed the family and use OOCA sources in secret to try and find Phineas. Even Ferb would use his brain to try and find Phineas, the brother he never met, even though they all knew how unlikely it would be to ever find him again. All of this would lead to the Flynn-Fletcher Family connecting to the Reporter, who had also tried to hunt down Phineas' family as well as alerted other law enforcements she trusts to help the child that didn't deserve all of this.

I am not sure yet how exactly they would all meet up again, but the family would get in contact with the Reporter through all of this and that would be how they would find out about Phineas. That he still lives. What he has been up to and so on and so forth. They would of course want to connect to him and help him.

Ultimately the organization would be destroyed and the Flynn-Fletcher Family would be united again, though Phineas would be different from his canon persona in that he lived through a lot of trauma. A healing journey would start, where Phineas would learn what it means to have a family and live a 'normal' life. Of course during all of this the focus would mostly be on the most important bond of the whole show, which would be the one between Phineas and Ferb. Slight hints to Phinbella would happen as well.

Obviously a lot of things are not planned in detail yet, but this would be the gist of it.

I have some more fanart I drew for this that I will post here regardless if people like it or not and I will maybe also write out a few scenes until I loose interest lol.

Part 2 here

Part 3 here

[duxfemina]

Not the original anon but reading your answer to the safety on road ask was so fun!

If you have time, could you please rank the following ancient Romans based on how good of a podcast they could produce?

Cicero, Julius Caesar, Brutus, Mark Antony, Cassius, Octavian, Agrippa, Catullus

Cicero would be the first century Joe Rogan, if you define a "good" podcast by it's popularity then definitely he's successful. If you want accuracy and quality maybe look elsewhere but regardless it will be considered entertaining usually

Julius Caesar - Some people listen just for entertainment like it's a good novel, some people religiously follow his pod and swear everything he claims is true. He's often flagged for fake news but he maintains he's absolutely done all the things he claimed to, up to and including the frequent allusions to his many love affairs with married women. His casual fans are fine, that hard core contingent that takes him at his word is toxic as hell and often makes people avoid his podcast but the casual fans are just there for the fun. Sorta like Star Wars fandom vibes

Brutus - his podcast is the opposite of Cicero's it's good, it's really good, it's also only got an audience of a couple hundred and a lot of those are his relatives or family friends, but he perseveres in sharing his deep insightful takes even if most of the people are just listening out of politeness

Mark Antony is podcast god. Everyone loves his show, unlike Caesar he really doesn't care if you believe his escapades are real or not. It's basically like drunk history without the history it's just him cracking up with some friends over drinks and taking the piss out of whatever the weeks topic is. It only gets serious when someone mentions Cicero and then Antony will get upset and either go on a tirade, which will make for a popular episode (some guests will deliberately trigger his Cicerophobia just for this reason) or he will drink too much (even by Antonian standards) and sulk and then the episode will have to abruptly end there

Cassius - I feel is the most likely to have like the life coaching, how to have confidence and succeed kind of podcast. He's relatively popular but never top of the charts and he doesn't mind. He feels he's helping people, he does resent that Caesar's hyperbolic tripe is consistently ranked higher than his thoughtful insights about how to make a better life for yourself

Octavian - he has listeners only because people wanna know if they're on his good side or if they should start selling their stuff and leaving Italy before it's too late. All his other listeners are either bootlickers, trying to casually bring up topics he discussed to make him feel validated and save their necks, or they listen because they're afraid he can somehow see the lists of names of who listens and if they're not on it he might add them to that OTHER list ie. The Proscriptions. Exactly two people willingly listens to three podcast and that's Agrippa, Octavia, and Attia and even Agrippa usually just has it in the background and is only half paying attention and Octavia is the only person to ever give him even a mild critique of his presentation

Agrippa - he only got a podcast because Octavian told him he should have one too. But while no one willingly listens to Octavian's Agrippa's smaller fan base is much more loyal and love listening to him give insights on military tactics and history and it's absolutely a fan favorite moment when he's at home to record his episodes and he has his sons on for a small segment where he lets them explain whatever strategy they employed in their games that day and he'll always find a way to adapt their child's play to a real life battle principle.

Catullus... I am sleep deprived and tired and my mind has blanked on who Catullus was

So instead I'll give you Cato. The Alex Jones of his day. He will rage daily and just keep getting more rabid, he is the king of the conspiracy theory contingent of podcasts. He will warn you about threats that 90% of which are invented and the other 10% somewhat accurate but wildly misrepresented.

*my comparisons to modern podcasters are based off of vibes not inferring that this person was the same in any real way