#also sorry i taught your kids several new words random mom

[howtomusicmajor]

Went to a history museum today and got jumpscared in the ancient civs exhibit when suddenly music started playing over the loudspeakers and it was the fucking. Seikilos epitaph. While I was still in the Egypt section. Now I have taught classes on this piece, but the Egyptian stuff puts it so out of context that I don't know *why* I know it.

So I'm looking around like I've seen a ghost, having flashbacks to my master's music history test and also lesson planning for my own music courses, before I finally round the corner and hit Greece. And it clicks. Suddenly I whirl to my partner and whisper-yell "it's the fucking Seikilos epitaph!" and scare them and also the nice family looking at the Rosetta stone mockup.

Anyway that was my day.

[ninjastormhawkkat]

Another Wordgirl Au: Morally Gray Wordgirl

Morally Gray Wordgirl au

I don’t know if anyone else in the Wordgirl fandom thought about this at one point. A what-if I thought one day was what would have happened if Steven became Dr. Two Brains before Becky became Wordgirl? Such as what if Steven became Two Brains when Becky just came to earth as a baby? This is where the au begins

In this au, Becky is adopted by Dr. Two Brains. After Becky and Bob crash land on earth, Bob carries Becky around for a bit and enters the city. This is around the time Steven first becomes Two Brains. Bob, while carrying Becky, runs into Two Brains. At this point, Bob has no idea that Two Brains is a villain. Two Brains has cheese with him and Bob is hungry. Two Brains awkwardly hands some of his cheese to Bob. Two Brains may be a villain now but he is not heartless to not offer someone that is hungry food. Bob eats the cheese while Two Brains holds Becky. Two Brains is nervous at first because some random monkey just gave him a baby to hold😟. When Becky looks at Two Brains, she curiously calls him daddy. She is just a little kid who think that this new man holding her is her parent now. Two Brains heart just melts😍after hearing her call him daddy and looking into her innocent, alien, eyes. He immediately begins to dote on her as a dad would, ex. baby talk and cooing. Bob watches the interaction between Two Brains and Becky and decides that Two Brains would be a great person to stay with and raise Becky. He later regrets his decision.😓😆Here is an outline for how this au would go:

1. Becky still becomes Wordgirl. Bob tries to implement heroic morals into Becky during the time she is being raised by a villain. Becky wants to become a hero because she does not want to see the lives of innocent civilians hurt. However, since Dr. Two Brains also implemented villainous ideals into Becky growing up, her moral values are kind of mixed in her actions as a hero.

2. Becky is more sympathetic towards villains. Ex. When Chuck and Butcher claim to be innocent after being framed by Amazing Rope Guy, she immediately believes them and tries to figure out another angle of who really committed those crimes.

3. She isn’t as upset as when the spotlight is turned off her such as when Tiny Big came onto the scene or when Granny May became bingo champion. She is still upset, but Becky is not as focused on the limelight as canon. She, from Huggy’s teachings, believes that a superhero’s true reward comes from protecting the citizens and just helping when needed to prevent or avenge the cruelest of injustices. Wordgirl will accept gifts or keys to the city out of politeness. She uses the limelight to give the people of Fair City comfort and assurance that she is still there to protect them. Becky views heroism as a job more than a pleasure. It is basically, “You get good results based on how hard and well you do the work, not just what others say.” mentality.

4. That being said, Becky will not take a passive stance and try hard to prove her innocence if the citizens suddenly began to take advantage of her heroism or if they turn on her such as with the evil duplicate or when Granny May framed her for crimes. As I said earlier, Becky in this au views heroism as a job she enjoys and doesn't take impolite backlash, constructive criticism yes. Basically she just becomes done when residents of Fair City act like morons who think they know better. (I have always had a problem when a majority of the residents in Fair City act like gullible idiots. It always irks me how they will turn on Wordgirl easily and not often give a proper apology when they realize they were wrong. Sometimes, to me, it seems the villains have better appreciation for Wordgirl than the citizens. I am not including all citizens, just seems like a majority do this.) (Okay rant over.) Becky will be like, “if you guys don’t want me anymore then good luck.” She will intervene again just to keep the city from going into complete chaos. She still cares about the safety of the citizens, she just does not like it when they abandon their trust in her for no good reason. She is not even mad at the villains who cause this. They didn’t force the citizens to dislike Wordgirl, that was their choice.

5. Becky will not often take her dad to jail. She loves her dad and does not like the idea of him not being home (the warehouse; Becky’s living conditions their are like my version of the Becky Boxleitner au, just somewhat better due to her living their all her life.) She also does not like the idea of having to fight him, but has to in order to keep up appearances and not let anyone get suspicious and start suspecting her identity. That being said, she will let Two Brains escape after stoping the crimes depending on the severity. If Two Brains just steals cheese from the grocery store, she may often ignore it (its just cheese and it can easily be replenished). For crimes such as stealing money or turning artwork into cheese, Becky will stop her dad, but later act like he got away (if police are not around. “Two Brains Quartet” still happens because police are there.). Becky may do this sometimes for other villains depending on her or their mood. Citizens and Villains believe that Dr. Two Brains is an extremely tough villain to catch which raises his credibility as Fair City’s #1 villain when Wordgirl does this. Captain Huggy Face is not happy when Wordgirl let’s her dad go, but he deals with it because she cares about her dad. Becky does stand her ground if her dad, and the other villains, do something dangerous that affects the lives of the citizens. Incidents such as the plot to mind control all the city with bunny buttons and the cheesteroid do get Two Brains arrested. (Becky is like, “Sorry dad, but I can’t let you threaten the lives of innocent civilians.”) Since this happens rarely, Becky usually stays at her friends houses until her dad leaves prison. She has a visitor clearance and does visits with her dad when she can. (Still brings him cheese.) Not much interaction with the Botsford family unless they were a focus in episodes.

6. Becky is more aware of when villains act deceitful. (She was raised by one herself.) She pretends to be tricked to let their guard down before turning the tables on them. (She can be tricky and deceitful herself when she wants to be.)

The police force are more competent in this au than in canon. They were able to capture most villains, with exception to Two Brains and other major villains, before Wordgirl came onto the scene. The city was similar to Gotham before Batman showed up. It was fine, but crime rates were still high. The episode “The Wrong Side of the Law” happens differently than canon. Wordgirl is civil and polite to the police, but does really like law enforcement or fully trusts them due to her upbringing by a super villain. (Two Brains taught her she can respect law enforcement because they are capable of doing a good job, it does not mean she has to like them or follow the rules all the time. I sorta think that the villains have some respect for D.A. Sally Botsford because of how she is good at her job.)

Now on to “Normal” girl Becky. Becky is still referred to as Becky Boxleitner. (Dr. Two Brains did not want kids ignoring or making fun of Becky with a last name like Brains, or something mouse related. He wanted people to know and treat his daughter as herself, not just who she is related to. Two Brains also wanted to give Becky some protection so random people wouldn’t bother her because of his actions. So he just gave her his old human name.) Becky is similar to her canon character with a few changes.

1. Becky will empathize with someone if they are feeling upset and hurt. But if they are doing something dumb and stupid, or anything that is concerning to her, she will be upfront and honest with that person (not complete brutal honesty but something like “Please don’t do something stupid, I care about you and your health.”). She isn’t mean, but she is forward and won’t bother to hide feelings if hiding your emotions will only make the situation worse. 

2. Both Becky and Wordgirl are sassy like her dad.

3. She is still passionate about words and respects her teachers and main authority figures.

4. Becky is more clever about excuses.

5. She enjoys science more as well as literature. Becky has top grades in her class. (Next to Tobey). She enjoys science fairs and is a bit better at creating workable, and visually acceptable, inventions.

6. Becky likes puns (Two Brains) and knows every fact about cheese as well as every fact about words (again Two Brains’ fault). 

7. Becky is still a fan of Pretty Princess, but has ponies, books, and science stuff in her room. She is a bit more tomboyish than canon.  

Becky is still friends with Violet in this au. I always viewed Violet’s mom as an open-minded nature women, based on Violet’s character and where they live. She is easily accepting of Becky and Dr. Two Brains despite Two Brains life as a villain. Becky is also forward early on how some of Violet’s traditions make her uncomfortable so there is no issue in the series. 

Becky is more a fan of words and science in this au. She and Violet have fun mixing art and science. Becky does not take art classes, but rather is part of after-school science and reading clubs. (She takes science club with Tobey and reading club with Violet.)

Becky is also friends with Tobey in this au. I have nothing against Scoops’ character. I was just more fond of his character development in the episodes during and after he learns Becky’s identity, plus a few before the reveal. (In the early seasons, it seemed that Scoops would do anything for a big story, even as exposing Wordgirl’s identity as Becky. I was upset in that Vocab Bee episode because Scoops did not seem to consider Becky’s input or feeling when he found strong evidence that Becky was Wordgirl. To me it seemed unfair that Becky had to throw her chances at a competition she was having fun in just to protect her identity because of Scoops’ actions and attitude.) Tobey met Becky when they were between 5 and 6. Tobey just lost his dad (up to interpretation on how) and was just lonely. Kids would make fun of Tobey’s nerd-side and some other mean reasons, or they would ignore him. Becky sympathized with Tobey because most kids, not Violet, would avoid her because of her dad. (They would not dare bully her for fear of how Dr. Two Brains would react.) Tobey and Becky easily began to get along and overtime became friends. Claire McCallister was worried about her son hanging out with the child of a villain. But quickly after seeing how Becky was a good kid plus Two Brains being a good dad despite his status, and that her son was happy with friends, she let her worries slide. Claire, Dr. Two Brains, and Violet’s mom, have made an unofficial single parents support group between the three of them. In this au, Tobey does not become a villain, but still builds robots. (I already have a new villain that takes canon Tobey’s role.) Becky and Tobey are silently crushing on each other. Tobey does suspect Becky is Wordgirl, but respects her secret identity and will wait for her to tell him (or a reveal). (Still cares for her anyway.)

Scoops parents are friendly but are strong law-abiding citizens so they avoid Two Brains and Becky. Scoops in this au is nice, but is more concerned on news stories. He originally talks to Becky in hopes of getting an interview with her dad. Scoops is trying not to be inconsiderate, but he is sorta using Becky as a way to get to her dad. Becky deals with this stuff from other reporters and fans of her dad. Neither Dr. Two Brains and Becky like this attention. (Two Brains likes being in the news and in magazines, but he doesn’t like people using his daughter to get to him. Becky is the most important person in his life with cheese being second.) Becky shuts Scoops down after his first few initial attempts. Scoops is disappointed, but he apologizes and doesn’t bother her anymore. Becky is civil and polite to Scoops in this series, but that is about it. There is no crush. (I don’t know if I will keep the Violet x Scoops ship in this au or change it.)  

I really like this au along with a few other aus I made up which include an Alliance Swap au. I am going to expand more on this au and the characters later.  

[not-your-damsel]

I Gotta Let it Out, Please Forgive Me Guys

I got a random message on Facebook messenger from my bestest friend from the tail end of middle school until onwards… or so I thought.

*Names have been changed for this… mess? I’m so sorry guys, I’m all over the place 😑 and this is kinda long so, head’s up

She was like a sister to me, we told each other any and everything. We wrote fan fics for *N’Sync before fan fics were even a goddamn thing, before there was a place to even post them! She made the life move from New Jersey to Pennsylvania bearable and then livable after having my whole life uprooted once again. My Mom and I always moved a lot when I was a child so I was always bouncing from school to school once I thought I was finally settled and was steadily making friends only to up and move again. That coupled with constantly having to go to the hospital because of my illness didn’t bode well for my learning abilities. I’m great at everything else now as an adult but don’t even come to me about math or I’ll spit on you, I don’t make the rules 🤷🏽‍♀️

However, once my Mom met my Sister’s father, our living situation somehow downgraded from living in a beautiful brownstone house to then living in a trailer in a trailer park. Please don’t take that as me shitting on trailer parks or folks who live in them. I just despise them because they immediately remind me of the verbal, mental abuse/gaslighting I endured when we lived there which continued into PA and the house we moved to there is all. My stomach churns when I pass by one as I immediately feel like I’m 10 again and about to be in trouble and grounded for the next tiniest thing he deemed wrong of me.

Anywho, we moved to PA when I was 12, my little sister having been born in NJ just before we left it to come here and I was livid. Leaving all my friends behind after finally having a taste of actually settling in and making friends and not moving away right after the fact only to pull the rug from under me and do it again. As an adult now, I get it. It’s safer here than where we’d been and the taxes rock, no tax on food or clothing or pharmaceuticals and also utilities for heat and shit and not to mention, a better school system.

And school is where I met my immediate bestie, around the second or third day being there, we had to swim for gym and since I didn’t know I had to sit out for the period where the other girls and I started talking about *N’Sync and she asked me who my face was, which was Lance and then she said hers was Justin Timberlake and that she fantasizes about him. Anyone who can tell me that right off the bat with the same energy as telling me what their favorite color or animal is has immediately won my friendship. Immediately.

That’s how we met, that’s how we rolled and we stayed joined at the hip throughout the rest of our school years together. We’d been through it all, crushes, familial loss, pet loss, watching mutual friends come and go or fuck each other over, and yet her and I remained as though we were born sisters. I never needed a whole entourage of people to call my friends. Whoever’s gonna hang with me, I love and appreciate and protect dearly and those who won’t that’s fine as well. But she was a constant in my life, we both were constantly in each other’s lives.

She provided an escape and safe haven away from my home when it got to be too suffocating to be within my own home because of my overbearing stepfather and I taught her how to appreciate and accept and play video games, specifically of the survival horror genre and we’d get together for a sleepover when a new release would come out and we wanted to get lost in stories and scream for dear life at perfectly crafted jump scares. She turned me on to being a drama kid since her and I were in chorus together being Soprano 1’s, and it turned out to be one of the most fun things I did in high school.

But time passes and we graduated. Sad as I was to be parting from everyone, we all began to scatter, coming together during breaks to party and catch up. After moved to Queens NY to be with my fiancé at the time and she was doing her own thing. Over time, life got in the way. There was no grand fight to speak of, no secretly harbored feelings of ill will or hatred, nothing of the sort. Which is why I’m left feeling so baffled over how what was meant to be a great reaching out and reconnecting moment ended up turning into me feeling angry, dejected and feeling as though maybe there were some things she never spoke to me about when she should’ve.

It started out great, happy to hear from her especially out of the blue since the times I tried to reach her would always fall through. We caught up with one another, as you do, and then the conversation turned from catching up to suddenly me being questioned about why I never contacted her. I explained everything that happened, how I tried several times apart from the yearly birthday wishes and such, and how I never got a reply back, that I assumed it meant she had a different phone number. How as the years passed more and more, my insecurities of no longer being wanted by her ran rampant and that maybe she had better people in her life. I apologized for that, seeing now that I was blinded by that insecurity and that was something for me to sort out. That and that life literally got in the way.

I told her everything as honest and truthful to the best of my ability because I’d never lie to her, never had and never would/will want to. I admitted to her that I’m definitely different from the last time she’s seen me and that I’m now utter shit with the phone. I personally think it’s a mix of my Major Depressive Disorder mixed with my anxiety that I prefer messaging over actually talking on the phone. But that’s not for my lack of trying to reach her over the years.

However, that wasn’t good enough for her though apparently. She kept pressing me and questioning if “I ignored her” because of scenario A, B or C. She said that. She literally said, “Did you ignore me because of…”. She started labeling despite me telling her what happened, putting words in my mouth. It got to the point that I was just repeating myself over and over because she kept interrogating me on the issue, bringing up weak reasons as though she just knew that was the “reason I dipped and left her in the wind” when meanwhile, when you look at which of us two was the last to try to contact the other through Facebook messenger, it shows it as me and before that all my attempts to reach her through something I knew she’d see my shit to her through and yet I was never answered.

I ended up saying to her, “Look, I don’t know what it is you’re wanting me to say here. I feel like you’re trying to get me to admit to something to please you but I’m not gonna do that because if I did, then I’d be lying to you and I’m not here for that. I told you everything on my end here, what has happened and that’s exactly what it is. Nothing more, nothing less. I don’t secretly hate you, I could never hate you. It wasn’t your fault about what happened with my ex and I at your party, I’ve never held you responsible for his cheating actions. He cheated on me with Stan, not you, so don’t think that has anything to do with you when you stuck up for me when we all found out the next morning. Please stop fishing for a conflict that’s not there.”

I don’t hear from her after a long while and I explicitly tell her that I want to talk about this more the next day because this isn’t right and I want to clear up whatever it is that she thinks is wrong, that I love her and to have a good night as it’s past 2am at that point. She proceeds to bring up past scenarios hours later while I’m well asleep and she knows this, guilt tripping me about how she was there for me whenever I needed to be in the hospital but that maybe I had forgotten what it meant to be best friends with her and she then blocks me on all socials knowing I can’t even fight for myself because I’m asleep. All socials save for one and that’s Insta.

I call her out on that shady bullshit and tell her that it’s absolutely unfair that I sat there and I was being an adult and admitting to my mistakes and apologizing for them only for her to push all the blame on me for not contacting her which we established that I had many times and not been acknowledged. I said, “The phone works 2 ways, Sadie, 2 ways. Do not sit there and act like you’re not to blame as well, especially when I’m here admitting fault and apologizing for it and you haven’t even bothered to claim some of that faulted responsibility. That’s fucked because if it were me having come to you, yet again, and this time you answered, I would’ve taken my part of the blame and admitted to my faults here as well, I wouldn’t’ve piled it all on you the way you did to me. I was honest with you and it seems that’s not what mattered to you, what mattered to you was putting untruths into my mouth to fit your narrative that “I hate you”, “that you never mattered to me” and so on. Again, not cool. Will it hurt to lose you? Absolutely, it’ll kill me to lose you permanently, but not at the expense of a lie you want so badly to be true.”

Not only that, but several times throughout this conversation, she would bring up something factual that happened, that she knew happened, only to turn around and say something snarky like, “I wouldn’t know what happened or I wouldn’t know about that because you never told me about it.” I sat there for a good moment afterwards, seriously questioning if she was drunk or high or a combo of the two and just crossfaded because it made no damned sense!!!

I’m not gonna lie, I’m truly hurt by all this. I cried happy tears when we first started talking because it had been so long, and then by the end of it, I was left baffled, hurt, confused, and feeling like I didn’t even know this person anymore and crying in a panic that this was all actually happening. That I somehow unknowingly became a villain to my own best friend, my sister. It still feels unreal, the whole thing was so all over the place, it gave me whiplash. I don’t know what to do and I apologize for putting a portion of me and my troubles on here, I just needed a safe space to vent and let loose because I’m warring with myself of if this is even still worth it with her because this feels so… icky. Like in my gut I can feel that this isn’t the same person I once knew and I’m only gonna find more upset, hurts and disappointment and that feeling causes even more hurt.

Idk guys, I’m tired and worn out. I cried a lot so that’s gonna and made me even more tired only with puffy, splotchy pinky/red rings around my eyes that now are sensitive to the touch from wiping them so much. But thank you for letting me do what I felt I needed to do and just let this mess out. I know it’s all over the place but I can’t even bring myself to fix anything if there’s errors and shit. Love y’all.

[turning-dreams-into-chaos]

Secret Life

*Not My Gif*

Request: Hey can I get a Peter x Strk Reader where she is undercover to watch him and they get really close (if you know what I mean) and then he finds out at liz’s party or homecoming and then calls it off? I love you and your writing is beautiful! Could this be a mini-series?

Requested by: Anonymous

Post Date: 6-21-19

Paring: Peter Parker x Stark!Reader, Tony Stark x Daughter!Reader

Word Count: 5.3K

A/N: Sorry I hadn’t posted in a few days, I try to post a request every day. This was one that someone requested like in May, so my bad on the wait. I got a lot of love on my Stark Reader posts so I hope you all like this one as well. Let me know what you think! Also didn’t edit this as much as I’d like, so if there is a mistake then please tell me!

-Ria

~Prompt List~

~Master List~

~Open Requests~

Your eyes were watery and your throat closed up, trying to keep the sobs from falling. You weren’t sure how exactly you got here, sitting on top of a random apartment building in Queens with your legs dangling off the edge, but you knew the moments leading up to this. It all started a few months ago.

— — —

“Hey kid!” Tony yelled as he chucked a stress ball at your head to get your attention. You caught It without even needing to look up already knowing he was going to do that. Finishing the last few sentences on a report you were doing, you glanced up and rolled your eyes at the fake offended look your dad was giving you.

“What’s up?” You smirked. You got up from the couch to head over to him as you crossed your arms waiting for him to continue.

“We got you a mission.” Your eyes brighten at this. You’ve basically been locked up since the whole Civil War issue between your family, which wouldn’t have been a bad thing if you hadn’t basically been in lock up since you moved in with your father. You were 9 when your mom died, leaving you in the care of your only known relative, Tony Stark. He didn’t believe at first that you were his and demanded that several DNA tests were taken, but once it proved you weren’t lying, you were left in Iron Man’s life. Knowing how his enemy’s would want to use you as a target he kept you out of the limelight, no one knew you existed except a few important people as well as the team. You didn’t really mind this at first, thanking the solitude as you adjusted to this new life. You watched as your dad built suit after suit without him knowing you were there, and he never did. Natasha taught you how to fight, just in case someone did find you, you knew how to protect yourself. You got quite good at sneaking around and being a Stark, naturally gifted in the knowledge category, so you took it upon yourself to build a suit. You spent years on it, perfecting it in ways you aren’t even sure really mattered, but when you tested it? Oh that bad boy was amazing! The next time the avengers went out on a mission, you snuck on the jet with them, hiding the best you could so you weren’t seen. It seemed to work because as soon as they landed you joined the fight. Tony just about freaked out until he watched you kick some ass. He was still worried but knew Natasha had you covered in the fighting and apparently you had a greatly made suit. But after the fight was over you got an ear full. But he came around. And you saw yourself joining the team in more and more missions. However, once the accords came into the mix and split your family up, you weren’t allowed on any missions. So now, Tony letting you out was a big deal.

“What’s the mission?”

“Remember the spider guy from Germany? The one I brought in?” You nodded your head waiting for how this involves you. “He’s a kid. Lives in Queens and I want you to shadow him. Make sure he’s not getting himself into anything he shouldn’t. Just watch him from afar. Don’t get involved.”

“You want me to babysit him? Save him from the monsters?” You mocked, dropping your shoulders. There was no way you were going to just watch over some kid from Queens who wants to play hero while you weren’t allowed to. You rolled your eyes and headed over the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of water before jumping onto the counter. “Look dad. There’s no way you’re sending me to watch over some kid. What’s so special about him anyways?” You asked hoping that you could find a way to get out of it.

“Well first off Miss Sass, he’s older than you so he’s not a kid. And second, it doesn’t matter why he’s special. You’re going, end of discussion.”

“But dad! I-“

“I said you’re going. Here. It’s a file with everything we have on him. Happy will be here in a hour to pick you up for school.” He said as he chucked a file on the counter next to you. You glanced down at it before pushing it away.

“I’m not going to school. I finished high school 2 years ago, remember?” You said jumping off the counter. You were determined to make this as hard as you could if you had no choice.

“No. Y/N Stark finished High School 2 years ago. Y/N Y/L/N still has a few more years.” He hands you another file with your picture on front. You scoff as you grab it, thumbing through its contents.

“What’s with the files? You couldn’t just tell me this?” You mumble looking back up at him.

He smirked as he grabbed Spider-Man’s file off the counter and put it in your hands with your file. “Where’s the fun in that?” His smirk dropped as his voice became softer, “Look kid, you don’t really have a choice here. I need someone to watch him and you’re the only one who could do it without getting caught. I understand why you don’t want to do this but please, don’t fight me in this?” You locked eyes before nodding slowly, knowing you are going to regret this. You opened Spider-Man’s files, trying to take in as much as you could.

“Peter Parker? Huh. At least he’s cute.”

“Don’t even think about it.”

You stood in front of the school, watching the numerous kids heading in chatting or texting, not even realizing you were there. You sighed as you walked in and scanned the halls for the face you were supposed to watch. When you didn’t see him you gave up, heading towards the office to figure out everything. Pulling out your phone, you opened Peter’s file that you scanned. The loud ringing of the bell earned your attention right before someone ran into you from behind causing you to fall on your butt.

“Uh... sorry.” You mumbled as you grabbed your phone that flew away before looking at the boy you ran into. He stuck his hand out to you and you happily took it, pulling yourself up.

“Oh, it’s my fault. Are you new here? I don’t think I’ve seen you around before. I’m Ned.” He rambled as you chuckled. You extended a hand to him and he shook it.

“I’m Y/N. And yeah, today’s my first day.” You gave him a smile which he returned before he started walking the way you were going. You stared at him shocked at the fact he just walked away before he turned around, raising his brows before indicating you to follow him. You caught up to him laughing a little. “I thought you were just going to walk away. But I didn’t seem like something you would do to someone you just met.”

“Yeah that wouldn’t have been very nice. I was going to walk you to office, help you get used to this place. Is that ok?” He asked as you nodded your head. “Oh! You should eat lunch with us!”

“Us?” You tilted your head looking back at Ned.

“Yeah, Us. Me and my friend Peter. Ok, here you are. Meet me in the lunch room if we don’t have any classes before then!” He started to back away, only allowing you to say a quick ok and thanks before he’s around the corner.

The rest of the day before lunch went by pretty fast, you still hadn’t found Peter and you were getting kind of worried. But when you entered the cafeteria and saw him you felt relieved, until you saw the boy from earlier sitting right next to him waving you down. Peter. He said his friend Peter. Why did that not spark any signs in your head! You silently cursed yourself as you headed over, taking a seat across from Ned.

“This is Y/N. She’s who I told you about earlier. And this is Peter.” Ned said as you and Peter exchanged looks. You couldn’t help but think about how much cuter he was in real life compared to a picture.

“It’s nice to meet you.” He smiled and you could basically feel the butterflies in your stomach, Damn why does he have to be so good looking! The rest of lunch went perfect and afterwards you learned Peter had all the same classes you had after lunch and a few before lunch he missed after he mentioned the Stark Internship coming up this morning. Playing your role, you ask him about the Stark Internship. He makes up something you didn’t really listen to because you were to focused on how his cheeks darkened when he was nervous. But when he started to say how great it was working under Tony you had to hold back a chuckle.

“What? What’s so funny?” He asked, instantly taken back by your laugh. Your eyes widened as you realized what you’d done.

“Oh it’s nothing! It’s just, you seem so fond of My- Mr. Stark. I-It’s nice.” You grimace at your almost slip up, hoping he didn’t notice. Which thankfully neither of them did. The rest of the lunch was you listening to Peter and Ned talk. You knew you shouldn’t have gotten close to them, but what your dad didn’t know wasn’t going to hurt him. You all joked and made nerdy references you thought they wouldn’t get, but in response they made just as many. The next few weeks went just as well, spending as much time with the two of them as you could. Peter never told you he was Spider-Man yet it didn’t matter because you already knew Peter’s secret, but Ned has apparently just found out that afternoon, a little while before you came over. You were sitting in Peter’s room, listening to music and working on math homework while Ned whispered questions to Peter. Your music volume was low so you could hear what they were talking about in case they wanted to talk to you, but Ned just wanted to talk about Spider-Man.

“Shhh man! She’ll hear you!” Peter said quietly looking at you as you bobbed your head to the soft music, pretending you didn’t hear them. Peter couldn’t help the smile that graced his face when he looked at you. He couldn’t deny the fact he was falling for you, he was falling hard. You had become such a big part of his life in 2 months and he knew he couldn’t bring you into his superhero antics.

“Dude, Just ask her out already.” Ned said, snapping Peter out of his staring, also causing your breath to hitch, but you played it off like you were working on a hard problem. Peter’s eyes widened as he looked away.

“NED! Don’t say that! She’ll hear you!” He repeated, although this time he yelled it, making it impossible to pretend you didn’t hear it. You yanked out your ear buds before smirking at them.

“Alright boys. What are we talking about?” You leant back in his bed, resting up against the wall as Ned spun around in Peter’s desk chair. Poor Peter who was sitting on the ground looked like a deer caught in headlights.

“Uhh. N-nothing Y/N. We weren’t t-talking about anything!” He said giving you a forced smile and laugh. You glanced between him and Ned before shrugging, looking back down at the math book in your lap before throwing it to the side, moving in the bed so your feet were up on the wall and your head was dangling off the bed, hair falling down as well.

“Guys, I’m bored! Can we do something?” You moaned as Peter looked back up at you. Your eyes met as you both blushed, but not looking away. You liked him. You liked Peter Parker, the one guy you were told not to get involved with. What a clichéd life.

“Ok well this was fun, but I have to go!” Ned quickly said before grabbing his stuff and leaving you two staring out the door.

“That was weird, right?” You asked before turning back to Peter and laughing.

“Honestly not really.” Your laugh was contagious as he found himself falling closer to you as both of your eyes closed, laughing as well. You weren’t sure at what moment it was that made you realize your feelings for him, but with all the time you spent with them, how could you not like him? He was dorky like you, smart like you, and once you get to know him, extremely funny. Peter opened his eyes before you, taking in the look of joy in your face before you opened your own eyes and he noticed how close you were. Your face was upside down and level with his and he couldn’t look away. Neither could you. “Hi...”

“...hey.” You whispered too scared to ruin the moment. “Do you remember the first week I came to midtown? When Flash was giving me a hard time in the hallway? And you came over to tell him to stop and then he just moved on to you?” He nodded, frowning and lowering his head as he remembered that moment. Flash was going on about you being the new girl and only being friends with ‘Penis Parker’ and Ned. You rolled your eyes and tried to ignore him but when he slammed your locker closed on you, you thought you were going to let him have it right then and there. But when Peter came and stood in between you and Flash, you couldn’t help the smile on your face. Even when Flash went after Peter he still stood up against you. You pressed your hand to Peter’s cheek as he looked up. “I never got to thank you. It meant a lot to me.”

“Flash’s a dick, don’t let him get to you. And of course I was going to stand up for you. You’re amazing.” He blushed at his words, and the fact that your hand never left his cheek.

“You’re pretty amazing too. You know that?”

“Yeah, but it helps to have someone remind me.” He smirked causing you to playfully scoff at his cockiness. You both fell into a comfortable silence before you bit your lip catching yourself glancing at his lips, looking back at his eyes to see him looking at your lips. The next second was a blur as you found your eyes closing and Peter leaning in.

“I’m home!” May yelled from the living room, causing both Peter and you to jerk away from each other in fear of being caught. You rubbed the back of your neck as you tried to calm your racing heartbeat. Peter got to his feet faster than you thought possible as you threw your books in your backpack. “Oh! Hi Y/N. I didn’t know you were here. Is Ned here as well?” She asked as you followed Peter out of his room.

“He was. But he left a little while ago.” You quickly said as Peter looked between you and May. His cheeks were still red and you hoped yours had cooled off a little more. May nodded her head as she pulled out the groceries she bought.

“Are you staying for dinner? We’re having meatloaf.” She offered grinning at you. You thanked her but told her your dad had already made dinner for the two of you. You said goodbye to Peter and May before heading back to the tower. Thinking of the almost kiss you just had. It would’ve been your first.

Tony had noticed you spacing out that night during dinner, but it was Nat that had brought it up.

“What’s up with you? You’ve been acting weird all afternoon. And you turned down training, you never turn down training.” She pointed a fork at you accusingly. No one knew that you’d gotten close with Peter. It was basically a secret life that you refused to let anyone in on, especially not your dad or Peter.

“Nothing’s up. I’m just stressed with all the school work that they’re forcing me to do. I mean, I’m smart but the amount of work they are giving us is insane. Also I’ve just been working on my suit, trying to get a new update working with it. It ain’t easy.” You half lied before shoveling a few last bites into your mouth. “Speaking of which, I’m going to go check on its status now. Thanks for dinner. Bye!” you hurried off leaving Natasha, Tony, and the others gawking at you. You ended up in your lab, one that Tony had built for you after you took over his lab, as you played with a few settings on your suit. You were used to going days without sleep, but unfortunately you’ve already spent your no sleep days prior to this moment. Your eyes started to close as your hand slipped, causing sparks to come from your suit and wake you up.

“Shit!” you yelled as you pulled your hand away before it could get hurt. You heard a few noises coming from the suit before the power went out in it. “No. no, no, no, no!” you yelled, trying to get it working again. When it didn’t work, you chucked your tools against the wall. Tony was heading down to talk to you before hearing the clatter of your tools hitting the wall and your groan.

“You know, tools tend help better when they are sprawled across the room.” He joked, leaning against the door frame as you spun in your chair to face him. He noticed the frown on your face as he came closer, pulling you in for a hug to comfort you. “You gotta get some sleep, bug. Look, I have to head to India first thing tomorrow morning, but I’ll be back by Monday, okay?” he said, pulling you back to look at the bags under your eyes. You nodded and gave him a small smile. “Just take it easy. Get some sleep. And stop hanging out at Peter’s after school for so long.”

Your eyes went wide as he smirked. “You know? H-How? I was so careful!” you shouted, slumping in your chair. Tony just chuckled and rubbed your arms.

“You do realize I can see your texts when you leave your phone on the couch, right? Also, I’m Tony Stark.” He said as you sighed, shaking your head at him. He kissed your head before leaving, coming back for a second to tell you to go to sleep. You decided to listen to him and call it a night, leaving your not-working suit on the table for another day.

The next day started to go by faster than you thought, and soon you found yourself in gym with Peter and Ned. You were climbing the rope, trying to get up and down faster than Flash, who had challenged you when Ned’s voice echoed through the gym.

“Peter knows Spider-Man!” you nearly fell off at his statement. What the hell was he thinking! You glanced at who he was speaking too and guilt struck you when you realized why he said it. They were trying to impress Liz Allen. You slid down the rope, roughly burning your hands but you didn’t pay attention, only laughing a little at Flash who tried to be cool and copy you, only to burn his hands on the material. You started to head over to do damage control before Peter said he met him during the internship. You listened to the conversation a little more, hoping you wouldn’t have to blow your cover but when Flash brings up the party, your heart drops.

“Yeah, I’m having a party tonight. You’re more than welcome to come.”

No…

“Having a party?”

No Peter…

“Yeah, it’s gonna be dope. You should totally invite your personal friend Spider-Man.”

Well, you’re fucked.

You look back at Flash, who wasn’t paying attention to you but sauntering over to Peter. If looks could kill, Flash would’ve been six feet under. You stopped paying attention, trying to come up with some way to get Peter out of this. When the bell rang you didn’t even process it until Flash bumped into you.

“Don’t worry, Y/L/N. He won’t completely embarrass himself. But you know, if he did, you could always spend the rest of the night with me.” Flash said as he threw his arm over your shoulder, causing you to scoff before shrugging it off. You started to walk ahead of him only for him to jog back up to you.

“You’re trying to hard Flash. I don’t hang out with people who put out for anyone with boobs.” You simply shrugged as you left Flash opened mouthed at your comment. Peter, from across the room, couldn’t help but listen in on your conversation, a sense of pride at your comeback. You spent the rest of the afternoon racking your brain with plans after plans. When school ended, you quickly found Peter at his locker and tapped his shoulder to gain his attention.

“Hey, Parker! What do you say we do something tonight? Maybe head over to Delmar’s and get some subs and then a Star Wars marathon?” you asked, biting your lip, hoping he’d agree. He gave you an apologetic smile and you knew you’d lost.

“I’m sorry. I can’t, I promised Ned that I’d go to Liz’s party with him tonight. Y-you’re welcomed to join us as well! As long as your parents are fine with it.” He offered as you sulked a little.

“My dad’s in India.” You mumbled, forgetting he has enhanced hearing as you hoped he couldn’t hear you. “Sounds like fun. Sure. Meet you there?” He nodded his head as you turned around to leave. Peter watched you leave as Ned came up behind him.

“Are you going to ask her out dude or not? I’m getting tired of watching you stare at her when she’s not looking.” Ned deadpanned as Peter groaned. He wanted to ask you out so bad, but he wasn’t sure if you even thought of him that way, if you even thought of him as more than a friend.

You picked up a sub on your way home anyways, falling on your bed as you ate it. You had to go to the party. You had to make sure Peter didn’t show up as Spider-Man and screw everything up. You glanced over to your closet, looking for something to wear to your first high school party. Running through the sweatshirts, T-Shirts, and pants you had you gave up, deciding to ask Nat for some help.

“Hey. So, I’m going to this… party… tonight, and I kind of need help with an outfit. I don’t think sweats and a band shirt are cutting it.” You muttered, trying to hide the embarrassment in your voice.

“Come on. Let’s see what we can do, Little Stark.” She grabbed your hand pulling you to her room as you both rummaged through her closet. She blasted some music and you both joked until you found what you wanted to wear. You ended up wearing tight blue jeans that fit your curves perfectly as well as a bright red, sleeveless peplum top. You curled your hair and pulled half up into a pony tail as the rest dangled off your shoulders. You looked put together but also nothing like you normally looked. “You look hot girl.” Nat said, voicing your thoughts. You giggled as she stood proud of her work.

“Thanks Nat. I have to go or else I’m gonna be late. See you when I get back?” you asked as you picked up your purse and threw your phone in. She hummed a yes before sending you on your way to Liz’s.

You sent Peter a text to let him know you were here before heading into the house. You quickly scanned around before your phone buzzed with a text telling you they were going to be there soon. You sighed before grabbing a cup and filling it with what you hoped was beer. You turned around after a few minutes when you heard Flash yell something over a microphone that sounded like ‘Penis Parker’. You grimaced before looking towards the door and catching sight of Peter and Ned walking into the house.

“Hey!” you yelled over the music as their heads turned towards you. Ned was quick to pull you in for a hug while Peter just stared wide eyes at you. “Peter?”

“H-hey! Y-you look nice-e.” he stammered as you grinned at him, biting your lip. You pulled in him for a hug and he squeezed you tightly as you whispered thanks in his ear. The party went on as you clung close to Ned and Peter, who couldn’t keep his eyes off you, not that he would want too. At some point you had separated to go to the bathroom, but when you came back you found Ned alone on the couch which sparked every red light in your head.

“Where’d Pete go?” you asked as Ned started yammering an excuse about something that you weren’t paying attention to. “Ok. Well, I’m going to get another drink.” You lied before running off outside. You looked around the building, quickly spotting the red and blue suit followed by a brown tussle of hair. “Really? Couldn’t even keep his mask on?” you whispered to yourself, throwing your hands up in annoyance. You were about to yell his name before an explosion occurred in the distance. You quickly looked over before turning just in time to see Peter fly off the building, right towards the big purple explosion in the sky. You quickly pulled out your phone to summon your suit before realizing you never fixed it after last night. Instead you dialed your dad’s number, knowing he was going to answer.

“Hey bug. What’s up?”

“Dad! I need you to send your suit! Put it through my phone so I can control it!” you panted as you started running, glad you decided against the heels Nat chose and went with your converse. “Can’t really explain, uh Peter, explosion in the distance, went after it, don’t know if he can handle it.”

“Ok. I sent the suit. What’s wrong with yours?” He asked completely forgetting about last night. “Right never mind, just remembered. Are-Are you running right now?”

You huffed a response before thanking him, hanging up your phone only to realize he was controlling it. “Damn it Dad. You couldn’t let me play hero. Or at least pick me up.” You didn’t have any eyes on the situation but you kept running, hoping you could be there fast enough. You felt like you were running for an hour, following the tracker on Peter’s suit, as you wounded up at a playground. You tried not to get close but Peter heard you, very out of breath and panting. Tony’s suit had just flown away and Peter was mad.

“Who’s there?” he yelled as you ducked behind a tree, cursing yourself at getting to close. Peter quickly threw his mask on as he looked through the trees, not seeing anything. “I can hear you. I know you’re there.” You felt your heart stop as you kept quiet. Peter carefully made his way closer, just in case you were dangerous. But when he saw you, bent over with your hands on your knees he couldn’t help but be confused. “What are you doing here?”

You looked up at him before looking down at the ground. “Damn, I need to run more. Look, just forget I was here Spider-Man. I didn’t see anything.” You put your hands up in surrender as your phone rang, buzzing against the ground as a picture of Tony and you popped up on the screen with big letters saying DAD. Peter’s eyes, or at least the big white eyes on the suit, widened as he looked down, picking up the phone before looking back at you.

“What the hell is this?” He tossed the phone to you and you denied the call. You could feel everything fall apart but only thing that let you have the upper hand is him not knowing you knew who he was.

“Why does it matter? My life doesn’t involve you, Spider-Man.” You challenged, hoping that he would drop it.

“Well it does when Mr. Stark is your father and you’re chasing after Spider-Man. So, tell me the truth Y/N. What the hell is this!” you didn’t catch how he said your name in enough time before you responded.

“It’s nothing Parker. I promise.” You froze. He froze. You let it slip so easily. What kind of spy were you? Peter reached up to pull his mask off and you saw how glossy his eyes were as he stared at you. You ruined it.

“You knew? This whole time you knew? What w-were you just a spy for M-Mr. Stark?”

Yes.

“Did any of this mean anything for you?”

Yes.

“Was I some mission?”

Yes.

“Peter…” you started. Your voice was on the edge of breaking as you reached your hand out to his, only for him to pull it away.

“NO! You were lying to me! Everything you said was just a lie!” His voice sounded so crush as tears fell from his eyes.

“Peter.” He turned to walk away before you ran in front of him, stopping his movements. “Please! Just hear me out!” He looked in your eyes but didn’t say anything, which you took as a go ahead. “When I was born I lived with my mom until she died and then I went to live with my father who had just came out as Iron Man. They decided to keep that a secret. They didn’t want the world to know Tony Stark had a kid and so I was hidden. But when you came into the picture, just a kid a few months older than me, my dad decided that they needed to watch you. So I was sent to Midtown and I wasn’t supposed to meet you, just watch from afar like I’ve done my whole life, but the more I watched, the more I got to know you and somehow you became my best friend. You became the guy I was in love with. I was never faking anything, ever.”

Your tears had flowed for a while now, both you and Peter broken hearted at your words. He didn’t say anything and you couldn’t speak anymore. You started to take a step backwards before Peter pulled you into him, locking your lips with his and you felt like you couldn’t breathe. It only lasted for a few seconds before he pulled away, taking a step back before facing you again.

“We’re done. I don’t want to see you anymore. I can’t trust you not to lie again. We’re done.” He muttered before flying away, leaving you in the playground with a broken heart. Your phone buzzed again and you ignored it, heading back towards the tower after your busy night. When your phone buzzed the last time you were about to throw it away before realizing what it was. Tony finally gave you control of the suit. You called it over, stepping inside as you flew up above the city, now heading anywhere but home.

This brings us back to you sitting on top of a random apartment building in Queens, eyes watery, throat closed, and legs dangling off the edge. Your dad’s voice echoed through your head.

“Don’t get involved.”

God you should’ve listened.

Part 2?

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Beyond this Existence: Counterpoint, chapter 17

Summary:  After being recompleted, Ienzo vows to do everything in his power to atone for the atrocities he committed in the past. But this life hasn't been easy, and he's plagued with memories and nightmares. When Demyx suddenly reappears, the two discover that they have more in common than they thought, though the secrets in their past might tear them apart. Zemyx (Demyx/Ienzo), post kh3

Read it on FF.net/on AO3

---

It seemed like winter would never end.

Demyx and Ienzo sat in the library on cushions in front of the fire. This was the only way to stay warm. Ienzo could not quite recall ever being so cold. Even in two layers, with a blanket, by the fire, he only held the chill at bay. Stone was truly a terrible insulator.

Ienzo could see the tension in Demyx’s shoulder even with the shell of the blanket. “I’ve never done this before,” he said. “Therapy.”

“I’ve never counselled.” Not for good, anyway. “It’s not as if you can make mistakes in this process. Take things at your own pace. We’ve got time.”

“I don’t know where to begin.”

“Maybe start with how you’re feeling.”

The firelight cast thick shadows on his face. “I feel… mostly numb. And anxious. And jittery, like someone’s going to come around a corner and get me. Sleeping is hard. Eating is hard.”

“You’ve barely touched your sitar.”

“Exactly. It’s like my whole head is quiet. Even before I had all my memories, yeah I was messed up, but I still wanted to be alive.”

Ienzo was glad that his hair covered half his face. “Do you want to die?”

“Not… die,” Demyx said. He twisted a corner of the blanket in his hands. “Just… not exist, you know.”

He took a deep breath. The scent of woodsmoke steadied him. “Unfortunately, you’re feeling this way because you’re whole,” he said. “Often the human mind can’t fully comprehend a traumatic situation until after it’s over. Once you’re out, the symptoms become more prominent. It doesn’t help that you had to repress years and years of your time as a Keyblade wielder. It’s a lot of work for the mind to do all at once. It’s actually a miracle you’re as stable as you are.”

“That’s because of you,” Demyx said quietly. “Not because of the power of love or all that. It’s when you were in my head. I know the memories are still there. I remember them. But at the same time, something about it stopped it from hurting so much.”

“I can’t say for certain what I did,” he said. “As I remember it, I was brought to a beach and I found you in the water. I took you out of it. And that’s all. Though--” He wondered if the water had symbolized trauma rather than memory, and if by removing him he dulled the emotional impact of these memories--like a good medication. “I’m afraid I don’t understand this new power of mine, at all. I’m not even sure I can replicate it.”

“I wouldn’t ask you to,” Demyx said. He picked lint off of the blanket.

“The good thing is that by processing these things, the symptoms will lessen,” Ienzo said. “But you’ll have to feel these emotions instead of bottling them up.”

“Oh, goody,” he mumbled.

Ienzo tried to smile. “I’ve been where you are. I am where you are. It’s not easy. But you have to. And you have to want to.”

“I do,” he said. He exhaled. “I want to be happy, and I want to be good, and frankly it really royally fucking sucks that now we have to deal with this shit instead of just, like, hanging out and going on dates and living . Like what kind of negative fucking karma did I gather in my previous life? Was everything I did as Demyx that bad? Do I somehow deserve this?”

“You’re not alone, feeling that way.” He sat up a little straighter. “You and I have had abnormal childhoods, and abnormal adolescences, constantly under the control of one adult or another who was playing god with us. Now that we’re real people, and adults, coming to terms with that utter lack of agency is almost impossible.”

“Agency?” Demyx asked. “God damn it. You’re right.”

“From now on I choose my own path,” he said, nearly to himself.

“But how?”

The million munny question. Ienzo shrugged. “Demyx, I really don’t know. We both want to help people, right?”

He nodded.

“And yet, we cannot adequately help others without taking care of ourselves. As I’ve learned.”

Demyx leaned forward and kissed him on the forehead.

“It’ll be best to take things easy for a little while,” he said. “Do what you can, when you can. This cold doesn’t help either. But getting stagnant will only keep you in that mindset.”

For several minutes he was silent. Then Demyx said, “What about you?”

“What about me?”

“How do you feel?”

Ienzo looked down. Honestly? Since he’d woken up from the coma he hadn’t given it much thought. He took a few minutes to try and unpack it. Mostly, Ienzo felt cold. Physically and mentally. Not… numb. His panic attacks had severely decreased in both quantity and strength (not that they ever fully stopped ). It was a bizarre sense of being both settled and uneasy. “I feel…” Those infallible two words. “Since I regained the lexicon, I feel stable. But at the same time it seems like a false stability. And I’m not sure if that certainty of falsehood comes from a place of truth or a place of paranoia. Hardly anything in my life has ever been stable.”

“So it feels wrong for things to even out?”

“I… yes. It does. And it shouldn’t. I know that much.”

“I know what you mean.”

The fire was getting low, casting odd shadows in the room. “Do you want to keep talking, or take a break?” Ienzo asked.

“We can keep talking. It’s even colder downstairs.” He took a few logs off of the hearth and put them in the flame. “How did you ever grow up in this place, anyway?”

“Well, to be fair I only lived here three years. From after my parents died, up until I became a Nobody.”

“...Is it starting to feel like home again?”

He considered this. “Yes and no,” he said. “There are terrible memories tied up in this place, and deep, unshakeable betrayals. And yet. As I’m learning to forgive everyone, and myself, those bonds are healing. And you’ve given me some good memories here, too. But this is as much home as I’ve ever had. At this point I have to create these concepts for myself. I never had them before.”

“What? Of home?”

“Of family,” he said softly.

Demyx curled a strand of hair around his finger. “I never really had that,” he said.

“No? Not even when you were a child?”

He snorted. “How do you think this child army thing worked?”

“I do not understand.”

Demyx started fidgeting again. “Well I mean. There were all sortsa different levels to it. Like, there were the wielders who were nobility, and kept passing it down to each other. And then there were just regular families who kept their Keyblades in their family line. And then there were just random ass people who happened to be “worthy” of it.” He said this bitterly. “Lucky me, I was part of the last group.”

“So wielders were the majority group?” Ienzo could not conceive of such a thing.

“I mean, kinda yeah. Even if you didn’t use it, or train with it, you still had one. There were whole sects who spent their lives doing whatever they thought it took to get a Keyblade, just to look better. Remember that there weren’t Heartless or anything then. It’s purely a status symbol. But around the time I was a baby Heartless did start popping up, taken from the future via the Book of Prophecies or what the fuck ever. And the Foretellers realized they had all this free labor to do the fighting. To gather the light.”

Ienzo leaned forward. He wished desperately for a pen, something he could use to write all this down.

“But of course all the rich snobs aren’t going to do jack shit. And the people that were willing got their asses kicked, or straight up died, and a lot of them had families of their own. But kids, you know, have strong light. What better way to get people to hand them over then feed them a bunch of propaganda about honor? And if they were poor, a promise of three hots and a cot?”

“And that’s what happened to you.”

Demyx nodded. “Yeah. I don’t even really remember my parents, at all. I used to have a picture of them, but… well. It’s lost now. I sort of remember that day. I was real little. Like little enough to not be able to make long term memory. They had this test to see who was worthy. Made it seem like a real ceremony. They took the kids aside, and then each of the five Foretellers would ask the kid a question. I swear I can’t remember any of it, but I’m sure it was all a vague test of character. And then they take you over to a table with some toys on it.” He pantomimed the table. “And they tell you to pick the toy that you like most.”

“That’s the real test, isn’t it,” Ienzo said.

Demyx nodded. “Yeah. I don’t even really remember my parents, at all. I used to have a picture of them, but… well. It’s lost now."

Ienzo took a moment to digest all this information. “So you were really on your own.”

“Yeah. The older kids would kind of look after the little ones until they were big enough to go out on their own. If you were lucky, you became part of a fighting party and made friends. I was part of a couple, but there’s all the typical drama and infighting and cliquishness. There was a lot of fighting. A lot of fighting.”

“Your parents couldn’t visit you?”

“I’m not really sure,” Demyx said. “I visited them, in my spare time. It was my mom who taught me music. But they... you know, it was hard for the two of them to get by, and they moved around a lot. Eventually... I couldn't find them again."

“I’m sorry.”

“No, don’t be sorry.” He sighed. “I’m sure they had their reasons.”

“I also know what it means to be abandoned.” His voice had dropped to a near whisper, barely audible over the crackling fire.

“It really righteously sucks.” He tried to inject some humor into the words, but it fell flat. “Oh boy. Haven’t had to unpack that in a while. Yikes.”

““Yikes” is right.”

He laughed, a stifled, awkward sound, and touched his brow. “I always get thrown to the wolves,” he said.

“Let yourself feel it.”

These were slow, quiet tears. Ienzo crossed the distance between them and pulled him close. “I feel sick,” Demyx said through his teeth. “These fucking -- These people are supposed to care about us. Why don’t they?”

“I don’t know. I don’t…” Ienzo could feel that pain too, sharply and acutely, as though he were being stabbed. Your master abandoned you.  

They told me you’d gone mad!

His breaths were short and shallow. He tried to fight off this distress automatically. But to  not take his own advice would be hypocritical.

They held each other. Cried a bit. It was an odd attempt at catharsis, but he had to admit it was somewhat effective. After all this they lay by the dying fire.

“Why do people cry?” Demyx asked.

“Well, interesting thing about that. When certain emotions rise to high in the body, tears are produced to return the body to homeostasis. Which explains the numbness while crying, and the sense of relief afterwards. Why is it you ask?”

“Just… wondered,” he said slowly.

“Do you feel a little better?”

He laughed weakly. “I kind of don’t want to talk about feelings right now. If it’s all the same.”

“Yes… I am tired.” Ienzo looked up at him. Demyx stared up at the ceiling, his eyes glassy and unfocused. When he realized he was being watched, he flashed a smile. “We should go. It’ll be getting cold soon.”

“I… I want to stay a little longer,” Demyx said. “It’s nice here by the fire.”

Ienzo sat up a little. “If you would like to be alone with me, you need only ask.”

He touched Ienzo’s face. “Isn’t it kind of messed up though? That after this whole deep and complex conversation I want to--”

“I’m sure there’s some kind of deeper reasoning behind it, but frankly right now I do not care,” he said, and kissed him.

It was the sort of kiss that was slow-building. Ienzo felt himself being pulled close, his callused hands slipping under both layers of sweater. In the midst of all this he was no longer cold. With all the layers Ienzo could not find his skin, and laughed despite himself. Demyx kissed him along his jaw.

“What’s so funny?” he asked.

“There is altogether too much fabric. It feels like fondling potatoes.”

“Oh my god.” He started giggling too. Ienzo realized he’d heard Demx cry far more than he’d heard him laugh. “Maybe we should continue this in your room?”

“I should… I should like that.”

They returned, dodging potential obstacles along the way. Ignored Aeleus and Dilan in the sitting room. Ienzo should not have found such sneaking around amusing, but he did. This was very nearly normal.

Demyx stripped quickly and crawled under the covers.

“Not exactly erotic, is it,” Ienzo mumbled.

“You want erotic, come back to me when it’s not negative eight thousand degrees in here.”

He rolled his eyes. “I highly doubt it’s that cold.” But when he undressed the air was punishing on his bare skin and he could not help but curl tightly under the covers until he stopped shivering. “There’s months more of this yet.”

“God--makes me want to scream.”

“Well, I’m afraid you’re going to have to contain yourself and be very quiet. Where were we?” He kissed him. No. Here it was not so cold at all. The light in the room had a soft, silvery look to it. He wasn’t sure why, but he was nervous, like this was the first time all over again. So much had changed in the past two months, even if he’d been unaware most of the time.

Demyx brushed the hair out of Ienzo’s eyes. “You still cold?”

He shook his head.

“What do you want to do?”

He felt the color rise to his face. This was normal, he reminded himself. “Make love to me.” Saying it, he felt embarrassed.

Demyx nodded. “Okay--yes.” He shifted his weight, teasing apart Ienzo’s thighs and resting on top of him. The skin there was soft, more sensitive than he thought, and he stifled a breath. “You can tell me what feels good and what doesn’t, you know,” he said softly. “I can’t read your mind.”

“It would be so much easier if you could.”

He chuckled. “Having someone else in your head isn’t all that much fun.” He traced circles on Ienzo’s inner thigh. “It’s right there, isn’t it?”

Ienzo kissed him. He could feel the flush of want in practically his whole body, curious and interesting. It was so bizarre to focus on the body. Most of the time he was so detached from anything. Demyx’s hand left his thigh, crept up past the curve of his hip to his side.

“And here?” He kissed it. It was a lush, electric sensation and Ienzo covered his mouth to keep from making too much noise. He could barely reciprocate. His other hand was caught in the hair at the nape of Demyx’s neck. Already there was a tightness forming in the pit of his stomach. He uncovered his mouth and touched Demyx’s cheek. “I love watching you,” Demyx said. He was slightly breathless.

Ienzo let his hand slip down against Demyx’s chest to his own sides. He gasped. “I thought so,” Ienzo said. He moved still farther down, between his legs. Demyx stifled a sound against his shoulder and then kissed him.

“I think maybe now is a good time to--” Demyx sounded weak.

“It’s in the same place. The lube.” His joints seemed to have turned to jelly, though it was rather pleasant. At least now he knew what to expect. The finger inside him was no longer uncomfortable. He had just enough reason to wonder why that was.

“You okay?” Demyx asked. He was flushed.

“It’s a lot less tight.”

“That happens,” he said. The second finger also went in fairly easily.

Ienzo laughed a little.

“You’re cracking up today,” Demyx said.

“Kind of an inside joke, with myself,” he said. “You’ve helped me change so much. Of course it would be there too.”

Demyx snickered. “Anyone ever tell you you’re a weird guy?”

“Sometimes a little weird is okay.”

“I think it’s kinda hot,” he said. He withdrew his fingers. This time Ienzo could enjoy being taken. Now that he knew what to expect it was no longer so overwhelming. Demyx moved against him, gently but not nearly as tentatively as before. “Slower? Faster?”

“Slow is good.”

“...I was hoping you’d say that.”

With every thrust Ienzo could feel him coming up against him in the exact perfect way. His dick rubbed gently against Demyx’s waist, providing much needed friction. The tension was almost unbearable, but every time he thought he was getting close things would get still tighter, still more intense. There was a lot about his own body he still didn’t know. Finally it all snapped. His vision went gray for a moment, like he might faint. He felt his hands trembling at Demyx’s back. “You okay?” Ienzo asked.

“Dizzy.” He got off of Ienzo and lay on his side. “I think we came at the same time.”

“Is that unusual?” He reached for a handkerchief to wipe off his belly. He wrinkled his nose. It was a shame the whole process was so messy.

“I don’t know. Maybe?”

Despite the stickiness, it felt good to rest against him. “So people really just do this whenever they want?”

He snorted. “You don’t need, like, a special occasion to have sex.”

“Some things still seem rather bizarre to me.”

“Yeah. I know what you mean.”

Now that the heat of the moment was fading, Ienzo pulled the covers up more tightly around them. “How old were you? The first time?”

Demyx blew a raspberry. “Seventeen. There was a guy in the Dandelions. We went on a few missions together. We’re all thinking, like, the end of the world is coming, and post-fight adrenaline plus teenage hormones is hard to resist. Yeah. But we weren’t like… in love, or anything. He was the only one I slept with. Before you, I mean. Why is it you ask?”

Ienzo shrugged. “Merely curious. So there was no one in the Organization?”

He raised an eyebrow. “ In the Organization?”

“While we were in the Organization.”

He shook his head. “Nah. I know some of the others tried that to feel something. I didn’t really care though.”

Ienzo nodded and lay back down. After all that he was exhausted. “I should like to take a nap,” he said.

“I’m getting good at wearing you out,” he teased.

“Amongst other things.” He yawned.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Fic, Found Evidence

Based on a prompt given to me by @protecterofalltheaus to make the phrase “you son of a bitch” as angsty as possible. I also got an idea from @ts-random-pictures for a version of Patton that a socio/psychopath and I kind of combined them. Picture this as an alternate universe, human au type of situation. I apologize for anything I got wrong about antisocial personality disorder. I tried to do my research but I probably messed up somewhere.

Tip Jar

Warnings: Implied death. Broken storytelling.

Abstract: It sure looks like Patton cares, doesn’t it?

[journal appears to be labeled “True crime” but water damage makes this uncertain]

December 8

Day 30. They still haven’t found them yet. No real news to report. Patton continues to insist that following this type of story can’t be good for my mental state but I beg to differ. It gives me peace of mind knowing that this isn’t ever happening anywhere near our apartment. -L

[next several pages missing or smudged]

December 20

Day 42. Another. Again. I’m having a hard time keeping track. I knew this one too. Whoever they are they’re getting closer to the university. They have to know class schedules for this to work. I’d phone in a tip but our mutual friend Virgil that helped us get this apartment doesn’t trust the police and he’s had a ridiculous influence on my decision making process lately. He’s awfully persuasive. The true crime podcasts are talking about this one even more. I must admit it’s unusual, considering [beyond repair from this point on]

--

Received: January 10

Mr. MacAlasdair:

We missed you at the meeting on Thursday. As you know, your attendance was required or you to be considered for the program again next semester, however knowing you I can only assume it was important. I am willing to put in a good word for you if you just email me, Logan. And don’t let this happen again.

-Stokes

Sent from my iPhone

--

[the second half of the pages were missing or shredded. selected passages from the first half of the journal are shown. each paragraph appears to be a separate entry, not dated]

Today I was introduced to Logan! He seems smart and doesn’t seem to understand Virgil either. Maybe he has aspergers. I can’t tell. I can probably get him to like me though. I like that.

The roommate thing is going to happen! [small drawing of flowers] and I think he doesn’t have aspergers. Just some kind of other learning disorder I think. He’s unobservant either way. I like him. He won’t notice.

I’ve figured out if I’m even louder than usual he will ignore me even more. Very good. Interesting when he’s annoyed.

[unknown number of pages missing]

Roman found out. Nobody was supposed to find out. Well, he knows what I am. Making people quiet is wrong, but I don’t wanna go. I promised I would stop. Roman is too nice. I know I make him uncomfortable. I remember when we were kids he was the one that convinced me not to burn ants. He was uncomfortable then too. He’s too fun to not keep around. I don’t know what to do.

I think Roman isn’t talking to me anymore. That should probably make me upset. Smiling didn’t work. If I can’t make him like me again I’ll slowly stop caring.

I broke into [name withheld] dorm this time. She was fighting with Logan in class the other day. I can imagine Roman doesn’t approve. It was nice though. Nothing was left untouched.

Logan is worried. I don’t know why. I haven’t killed anyone.

Logan follows local crime and true crime podcasts. He didn’t tell me. I thought we were friends. [detailed drawing of a crying emoji]

I tried to tell him he’ll get worried. Normally that works but it didn’t! Why is Logan thinking about something that makes him upset? I don’t understand upset but I know I don’t want Logan to be upset.

Logan can’t leave.

[pages missing]

--

[messages written on post-it notes and scraps of paper in various handwriting, found in a shoebox, readable ones have been transcribed. the original order is not known.]

Patton you’re better than this. Let us out. We knew you could just not be one of those. -Roman

Patton, he finally says he won’t listen to the podcasts anymore. He promises. -V

If you don’t want me to worry then let me go to the meeting. All you’ve done is property damage. I see no need to notify the police.

Can you send water?

I still love you. Mom always knew you could be good, right? Don’t prove her wrong. Remember the ants. The noble ants. -Roman

Thank you.

[a detailed drawing of a cat]

Happy New Years, Pat.

Please don’t follow that line of logic. -V

Why did you bring Virgil into this? Please let him go he had no knowledge of [smudged]

Why are we in here?

[a cartoon drawing of a cactus]

Can you at least get the leak in the roof fixed if you won’t let Roman and I out of here?

We know you’re picking these up. Just talk to us. You’re better than this. I didn’t know you had antisocial personality disorder but I don’t care. Let’s just talk about this. -V

I know you hear me. I am tired of yelling. Open this door.

I know you only pretend to care about people like the therapist taught you but I still love you. Now talk to us. -Roman

--

[text conversation between Virgil Shea and Patton Sanders January 11]

V: Why did you unlock the door and leave my phone?

V: I know you’re getting this.

V: Don’t do anything stupid.

P: Hi!

V: Oh, thank f*** where are you?

P: Golden Gate. It’s so pretty!

V: Do you even care that we were locked in that room for over a week?

P: I should.

P: Verge, I’ve never killed anyone before.

V: F*** you’re not going to start, are you???

V: Patton, call me. I swear to god

P: Sorry. No, nobody’s dead. That wouldn’t be nice.

V: You were so happy all of the time. Was that just a cover-up?

P: I liked having friends. Well... acting happy gets you more friends.

V: So what? You thought you’d somehow help your friends by ruining things that belonged to people that annoyed us? By locking us in a room when we found out??

V: Call me. For Christ’s sake. We need to talk about this.

V: Was I just a pawn to you?

V: Patton, pick up the damn phone.

P: Nobody likes psychopaths, do they?

V: Pat, I’ve never seen you be this cryptic before. Not all psychopaths are goddamn murderers. You can be a good person. Logan is driving us to the bridge. We can talk this out.

P: Tell Roman I did it for the ants, okay? And the cats and everyone else. <3

P: ily

V: PAT

V: I can see you. Pick up the phone.

V: ANSWER THE PHONE

V: YOU SON OF A BITCH LET ME TALK YOU DOWN

V: ANSWER THE CALLS

--

“So what happens when you jump off a bridge that high? It's nothing like Olympic high diving, regardless of the skill of the jumper. You hit the water at 75 miles per hour,” -a sentence read on a webpage in Sanders’ most recent search history.

[end]

[eminperu]

Dreams Money Can Buy: The economics of a pay-as-you-go vagabond lifestyle

Since my last Facebook post about another jaunt across the world, several people have reached out to me asking the same question: how do I “fund my lifestyle” (copyright Emma). It dawned on me that A) lots of folks are looking to travel the world but B) are not sure how to do that realistically and responsibly. As an additional obstacle, people—even the vagabonds—often get weird and cagey when asked about their finances. Luckily, I’m 100% comfortable letting you know that I’m pretty poor and I’m still living what Cardi B and Chance might classify as close to—if not my best—life. I’m happy to share my strategies for the nomad life as someone who has never considered planning a strong suit and whose butt gets all itchy at the sound of the word “budget.”  This is definitely not a how-to, but a how-I-do guide that hopefully can offer one perspective to those who, like me, dream of being homeless and financially insecure—I mean, wanderlusters.  Naturally, each point is organized by subcategory titles borrowed from legendary and timeless songwriter Aubrey Graham. Started from the Bottom (now we’re still near the bottom)

Okay, not exactly the bottom, but not far off. I did have some savings before I started traveling, and I think that cushion was pretty important for my peace of mind/not dying famished in the streets. I set a (admittedly pretty arbitrary) bottom line that I would be comfortable—not thrilled, but not fully catatonic—to have when I returned to a more “traditional lifestyle.” I put that amount in a do-not-touch savings account. Luckily, I haven’t really had to dip into this kitty very many times. Though, again, I’m admittedly no financial wizard, I would estimate over the course of the last year I’ve netted about -$2,000. To me, this year, the amount of time I spent not working, and the amazing experiences I have had were worth significantly more than that figure.

God’s Plan/Controlla

You can plan your travels in advance to varying degrees, but it’s crucial to be honest with yourself about how much uncertainty you can stomach without anxiety sucking all the joy out of the cool stuff you’re doing. I’ve had people tell me, “Oh, it’s so crazy how you can just hop on a plane and not know where you’re going next. You’re flying by the seat of your pants!” Two things: 1) I hate pants. 2) More often than not, I do plan at least my immediate next move in advance. This isn’t so much a due my discomfort with uncertainty, but rather how frustrated I get when I’m forced to spend substantially more money on a ticket/room because I couldn’t commit in time. As a general rule, I plan international travel at least a month in advance and try to get things settled for big within-country trips a week before I leave. I make sure to search airline sites directly, especially for within country travel, and I don’t hesitate to call booking sites instead of reserving online to see if if they can cut me a deal—they’re out here looking for that commission. That being said, the best practice is to seek advice from people who have visited or, better yet, live in your destination. Not only can they steer you towards the right locations/companies/etc., they can also advise you when it might be more economical to book real time in-person as opposed to beforehand online (this happens quite a bit, especially in less-developed countries. Trip Advisor is not always your friend, yo.). Plan as much in advance as you need to in order to feel comfortable and excited, not overwhelmed and anxious, for your trip.

Hold On, We’re Going Home

Building off my last point, for me, having a space to unpack my borderline-hoarder amount of clothes and plug in my electric toothbrush is crucial to my mental health. Who doesn’t love a nest? Though a lot of people move intermittently between destinations, I was pretty settled in Lima. Before flying in, we booked a month in an Airbnb. I easily found a three month room to rent on Facebook/Craigslist, and used the same method to find two of my jobs (oh, sidebar—look for and join ALL online Expat groups as soon as you get to a country. Go to a language exchange and ignore the creepy older dudes who try to get you to “teach them English” and look for other expats who are probably new to the area, too). I also knew I was setting up base camp somewhere with an incredibly low cost of living, and that was intentional (Meygan’s intention, not mine, but still).

Mob Ties

This will be a small section, as it deviates from the financial focus of this piece, but I think it’s important: be proactive ASAP in making friends. It’s so, so easy in any city with a large expat population (again, join the Facebook groups).  Expats are prone to be quite outgoing, likely share your interests, and probably have lower friend standards than you’re used to! Living abroad is like college, and all the other expats are your new floormates. There will definitely be some weridos, but you’ll sift through them and find the gems. Plus, traveling with friends makes things cheaper, so this section is totally relevant. (Nailed it.)

Hotline Bling

This one is straightforward: Make sure your phone is internationally unlocked and get a prepaid SIM card immediately in each country you go to. I’ve never needed to pay more than $20 a month for talk/text/data (you’ll only really need data) and it is PLENTY (how many of you are looking at your Verizon bill and fuming right now?). International plans don’t make sense in the long run and scrambling from Starbucks to random hostels for WiFi is not a good look.

Nice for What

One of the benefits of living abroad is that as soon as I moved, people started hitting me up to visit and/or meet them places. I’ve had the opportunity to visit magnificent destinations with magnificent friends, some of whom I hadn’t seen in years. If, like me, you’re overwhelming popular and well-liked, you have to be realistic and honest about where you can and cannot travel. Whilst on a budget and trying to function in day-to-day life, sometimes merging plans with friends looking to vacation is just not feasible. Compromising is great; it’s also valuable to let the homies know that this isn’t just a trip for you, it’s your lifestyle (did you just throw up a little bit as you read that? Me too. Sorry). I got super lucky and my friends who came and visited me in my more permanent location—Peru—didn’t force me to go to Machu Picchu 96 times! Every country has a bunch of cool stuff to do, and they were more than happy to meet in Colombia, hop on a jungle excursion, or otherwise with plan something that was in my budget/I hadn’t already done.

In addition to being realistic with my budget and with other people, I had to be realistic with myself, which involved some reprioritizing. I haven’t really bought clothes in the last year. I didn’t make my usual music festival rounds. I wasn’t planning to see my family for Christmas. My shoes, which have amassed an innumerable amount of miles, are essentially all falling apart. Time and time again, I chose experiences over things and I couldn’t be happier with that decision.

Nonstop

Having a job, regardless of the wage, always makes me feel better about spending money. You can make money in a variety of ways, but here’s a hot tip: TEACH ENGLISH ONLINE. I AM NOT KIDDING YOU I WOULD NOT HAVE DONE WHAT I DID THIS LAST YEAR WITHOUT IT. There are a myriad of companies (I’m with VIPKID—lemme talk to you about it and get some $$ for helping you apply) that allow you to set your own schedule and teach online from anywhere with a strong WiFi connection. I taught every weekday in Peru from 6:30 am to 9:00am (and an occasional weekend evening) and was done with my workday by 9:15 in the morning. I was also able to teach when I came back to Kansas, when I was home in California, and when I was traveling, Plus, I get money for referring you desperate plebs.

Let me tell you why VIPKID is infinitely better than getting an in-person job (even teaching English) abroad:

The hours and location are 100% flexible. I can open my schedule weeks in advance or the night before, and I can teach fifteen classes in a row or one single class.

There is no lesson planning. Prepping for teaching is an evil succubus that lures you in and steals your time and also several parts of your soul. The VIPKID platform offers ready-to-use lessons that have a universal structure. I don’t even glance at them before I start teaching. It’s the most low-maintenance, easiest form of instruction I’ve ever been involved with.

You don’t need to worry about getting a work visa. For all the work I did in Peru, I was paid cash under the table, as getting a carnet de extranjera (similar to a green card) is time-consuming, expensive, and difficult. I'm not 100% sure, but I feel like this is the case in most countries.

Yes, I make $20-$25 an hour, which can make you feel no ways (real Drake fans will catch that Easter egg), especially if you’ve been making a steady salary in a a place like New York or SF (let’s not get into it here, but all the more reason to advocate for not paying/treating our teachers like trash). However, it’s consistent money, I can do it anywhere, and $20 goes real far in most places outside the U.S.

The Catch Up

That being said, the side-hustle is EVERYTHING. Proofreading, translating, tutoring, working remotely, waitressing, bartending—anything that doesn’t require a lengthy application process and set hours is ideal. While I was back in the States, I very quickly and easily got a temp job working in my mom’s radiologic imaging office; I got to experience an entirely different line of work and gossip and eat donuts with the girls in the front. I absolutely loved it.

Apps like Grabr or housesitting apps are also excellent ways to make money doing stuff you’re already planning to do. Grabr allows travelers to sign up to bring things to people in their destination country that take too long or are too expensive to ship from their country of origin. This utilized two of my strongest skills—ordering items from Amazon and packing a checked bag weighing exactly fifty pounds. On my trip from the U.S. to Peru, I made over $300. Did I bring a kitchen scale and finely ground white electrolyte powders through South American customs? Yes! Did I assume I’d be going to Peruvian jail? Maybe! Honestly, I was more concerned about the giant car part leaking oil that I brought through TSA in Kansas City (thought about leaving a “This is not a bomb note”—decided against it). The point is: it might have taken a little time, some research, and a bit of aplomb to find opportunities like this, but luckily I had all those things in spades. Disclaimer: Use your judgment. Don’t do weird stuff.

Also, in all honesty, got a pretty cute tax refund this year, seeing as I made a significantly larger sum of money in the half of the year when I was full-time employee in California than when I was a part-time degenerate in Peru.

All Me

As resourceful and savvy as I’m feeling after writing this, I have to come clean. This might be a bit of a bummer for those fiercely independent amongst you: I did not even come close to doing this without a ton of help from my ridiculous circle of incredibly generous family and friends (HAHA GOTCHA, IT WAS NOT ALL ME. SEE? SEE WHAT I DID?) My list of people to thank would surely earn me the wrap-it-up music at the Oscars, but I’ll try anyway: My parents helped my broke ass get home so I wouldn’t be alone for Christmas. My friends from all across the world and all phases of life let me crash with them for weeks at a time (and gave me cute clothes that “looked a little weird on them,” made me banana flaxseed pancakes, and did my laundry). My brother and his smokeshow wife bought me flights and let me move into their giant British mansion to be their nanny (they don’t have kids). My saint of a mother literally gave up her bed and shared her tiny apartment with me, advocated for me to get a job that meant her doubling her workload, and let me eat all her food while standing at the refrigerator like a teenage boy. People have given me advice, contacts, hotel points, and miles. Gratitude will forever be the brush with which the memory of this year was painted.

All in all, I’ve had an overwhelmingly positive, life-changing experience with the joys far outweighing the stresses. It’s not hard to do, and I hope this very Emily-specific example can be of some help to you. Remember, you too can shirk all your responsibilities and run away to a foreign country! Even if you’re 25 sitting on 25… cents.

P.S. If you liked this post, please send me shoes.

[werewolfdays]

Family Matters

part 2 of this. In which Nadya has awkward parent talks. I think we’ve all been there. (content warning: abuse mention) -

Hours had passed since the incident with Ruben, but there was still adrenaline coursing through my veins, keeping me wide awake and causing my heart to pick up and slow down sporadically. I tried my best to sleep it off, but only managed to stare at my ceiling for what felt like an hour straight. It didn’t help that I was alone. Particularly in my childhood bedroom. There were nights when I was a kid where I would be too terrified to close my eyes with Ruben’s room being just down the hall. Him showing up unannounced tonight made me afraid of every shadow in every corner of my room. It was like I was a scared little kid again and that made me feel ridiculous. 

Being separated from Jayde only made my anxiety worse. I wanted to be near her more than anything right now. She was a beacon of safety through the dense fog of fear that filled my head as soon as I learned that Ruben had made an appearance. Even when he placed his hand on my shoulder and whispered in my ear, I was able to push through that terror because Jayde was beside me. 

My mother offering my brother’s room to her was almost laughably offensive even though she wasn't aware of it. I honestly was expecting to find Jayde on the couch once I got up. The only reason I haven’t gone to her yet was because of a part of me that was worried about coming off as weak. Jayde was so adamant about me being strong. I didn’t feel strong. Not when dealing with Ruben. Going to her now, when I was struggling to even sleep in my own bed and afraid of the dark, would make me feel like a coward. That was ridiculous too, I knew it, but I wanted to pretend that I had already shaken it off. 

I rolled over onto my side with a hopeless huff, accepting that I would get very little sleep tonight if I was lucky. I still shut my eyes in another feeble attempt to will unconsciousness to me. Several more minutes passed of me forcing my eyes to stay closed with absolutely no signs of a beloved dreamland on the horizon. Just as I was about to throw my arms up in frustrated defeat, I heard my bedroom door open behind me. 

When I looked over my shoulder, I was greeted by the glorious sight of Jayde carefully peeking her head into my room. “Oh, thank god.” I muttered, feeling a large and giddy smile appear across my face. I flipped myself around, scooting back to make room for her and pulled the blanket back in an invitation. 

Jayde had her own grin to match mine, discernible even in the darkness of my room. She quietly entered and shut the door behind her. In a few light-footed paces, she fell right into bed with me. Rather than staying on her side, she placed herself directly on top of me and I was so utterly relieved by her closeness. I wrapped my arms around her neck to pull her down just as her arms wrapped around my waist. Having her face buried in my neck, lips planted on my skin, was comforting beyond words. Then her hands worked their way under my shirt, but not necessarily in a sexual manner, it seemed more like she needed skin-on-skin contact. Her thumbs gently caressed my back without initiating any other intimate touch, confirming what I already assumed. 

“Fuck, not being able to touch you when I want is killing me.” Jayde mumbled into my neck. 

I had to admit the same, “I know, me too. It’s only for a couple more days.” My fingers started to lazily brush through her hair and I loved the way it felt. 

Even though it was hard for both of us, Jayde was understanding of me not being ready to come out to my parents just yet. I knew she’d never push me. Her sneaking into my room to make up for it was actually kind of exciting. Like I was finally getting that classic teenage experience where boyfriends would sneak around with their girlfriends when her parents were home. 

Jayde pulled back enough to look at me, her dark blue irises looking almost black in the low light, “How are you feeling?” 

I knew she was asking about Ruben, “Okay, I think. Better now that you’re here. I couldn’t sleep to save my life.” 

“I’m sorry I didn’t come sooner,” she said, her hand reaching up to brush a strand of hair out of my face, “I just wanted to make sure your parents were asleep. Pretty sure it would be suspicious if they caught me sneaking into your room in the middle of the night.” 

“That’s part of the thrill, isn’t it?” I asked, raising my eyebrow teasingly. 

The corner of her mouth curled up in a crooked grin and she released a quiet chuckle, “Next time I’ll throw rocks at your window.” 

I smiled too, “Why not skip the rocks and go straight for the boombox? Just wake the whole neighborhood up.” 

The image of that made her drop her head against my neck again to muffle her laugh. Then she pulled back to say, “Might as well hire a guy for skywriting too while I’m at it.” 

“You wouldn’t even be able to see it.” I pointed out with a giggle. “It’s been cloudy all week.” 

That just threw us into more laughter. I had to cover my mouth with my hand to keep myself quiet. Jayde still hushed me through her own struggle to keep her giggles under control. It took us several minutes to rein in our laughter. Every time it seemed to start dying down, we would just be thrown into another random fit. The fact that we had to try and be quiet, for fear of waking my parents in the next room, just seemed to make nothing all the more funny. 

When we finally did calm down, Jayde’s head rested on my shoulder, her body still mostly draped over mine while my fingers continued to play with her hair. Without even trying, she had given me exactly what I needed. 

“Thank you, Jay.” I told her softly.

“For what?” 

“For making me feel safe here. In this room.” 

“All I’ve ever wanted is to make you feel safe, Nadya.” she murmured, leaning in to place a single gentle peck to my lips and started to run her hand up and down my side soothingly. 

We stayed quiet for a while and I could sense that Jayde was deep in thought. The swirling patterns of her fingertips against my skin felt more like a distracted fidget. I wasn’t the only one affected by Ruben’s appearance. I pictured the look I saw in Jayde’s eyes when she was preparing to kill him and I couldn’t recall a time where she looked more terrifying, outside of being in her wolf form of course. Even knowing that she would never hurt me didn’t seem to stop the primal alarms blaring off in my head when I stood in between her and my brother, screaming at me to get out of her way. Standing in the middle of two extremely dangerous people had to be one of the most nerve wracking things I’ve ever done, but it avoided bloodshed. At least for now. 

“Can I ask kind of a weird question?” Jayde asked in a shy tone of voice. 

“Yeah.” 

“Ruben looks like your father…” She began carefully, “And he even looks like you a little bit… but he doesn’t look like your mom.” 

A fleeting smile flickered across my face at her observation, “No, he doesn’t.” 

“Your mom isn’t his mom, is she?” 

I shook my head, and took a deep breath before I recounted a discussion I had a long time ago, “Years ago, my mom told me that my dad had a girlfriend before he met her. He got her pregnant and wanted to marry her, but she always danced around the concept for whatever reason. Then, a couple years after Ruben was born, she just up and left. No word, no note, nothing. When my parents got together, my mom adopted him as her son and raised him.” 

“Does Ruben know about that?” 

“They told him when he was fifteen. He acted like he didn’t care.” I left out the part where he didn’t bother to pretend around me. I spent that day hiding away from him as much as I possibly could. The news only made him hate me more. 

Even though I didn’t tell her, Jayde must have still sensed it somehow because she pulled me tighter against her. “Let’s not talk about him anymore. I was just wondering.” 

“Okay.” I agreed softly.

“Get some sleep, my love.” She gently urged.

“You too, Jay.”

Unsurprisingly, Jayde was able to beckon me into unconsciousness with little effort. I was so relieved to get some rest after believing I would be sleep deprived for days. Nothing hidden in the darkness could touch me when she was here. Ruben couldn’t do anything without going through Jayde first, and if tonight’s events taught me anything, it’s that she is far more capable than he is. I was worried about him showing up again someday, he’s never been known to back down from a challenge before, but I had faith in our chances. I had faith in Jayde. 

I woke up some time later to see the early morning sun casting my room in a deep gray. I sleepily reached over to the other side of the bed for Jayde, but found it empty. My sudden panic caused me to jerk awake so I could look for her. 

“I’m right here.” Jayde said reassuringly, directing my gaze up to where she was standing by my dresser.

“What are you doing?” I asked, blinking at her through my drowsiness. 

She smiled at me sweetly, holding up a picture I had taken when I was in high school, “Looking at your stuff.” 

I rubbed my eyes and let out an amused huff, “It’s not much to look at.” 

“I beg to differ,” Once my vision refocused, I took in how beautiful she looked standing by my window, illuminated in soft gray, and just smiled at the fact that she was mine, “You always had a talent for photography, I see.” She waved the photo at me before putting it down and grabbing a lanyard with an ID badge on it, “And you were a camp counselor as a teenager? Please tell me there’s pictures of that.” 

“The camp counselor thing was only for one summer before I left for college.” I explained, trying not to blush, “It was fun and the kids were great, but they were also very loud and a nightmare to organize. I decided I prefer being peaceful when outdoors.” 

Jayde made a noise in agreement and continued to study my badge, “Who can blame you.” 

“Why are you awake?” a chill made me curl into the blanket more, “Did you have a bad dream?” 

“When do your parents get up?” She asked with a pondering glance.

I shrugged, “I don’t know, around seven I think? Maybe between six and seven. They’re morning people.” 

“It’s just after six. I don’t want them seeing me leave your room.” 

“Stay a little longer?” I pleaded, giving her the best puppy-eyed look I could manage. 

Jayde stood there smiling at me while I continued to stare at her, like we both knew she couldn’t resist my request. After a few moments, she placed the ID badge back down on the dresser and trudged back to bed. I grinned in triumph when she settled herself on top of me once again. 

“Five more minutes.” She told me.

I held her tighter, knowing that as soon as she left this room we would have to find small moments throughout the day just to touch. “Ten.” 

Jayde hummed, propping herself up on an elbow to study my features as she bit her lip, “Better make the most of it then.” 

I realized what she meant when her eyes glanced down at my lips. Not wanting to waste a single second, I pulled her in for a kiss that soothed both of our deprived souls. Cherishing the warmth of her breath and the silkiness of her tongue brushing against mine. Her hand went under my shirt again with a clear purpose this time. I released a pleased sigh in between kisses when she began stroking up my stomach to gently caress my chest. The way her thumb brushed over my breast made the next sigh turn into a light whimper. Jayde pushed her knee in between my legs to press her thigh against me and I was quickly starting to lose myself in her. 

As I was enjoying every bit of contact, Jayde’s mouth laying wet kisses along my pulsepoint, she suddenly stopped. Her head perked up and tilted to the side like she was listening for something, but I couldn’t hear anything. 

“What is it?”

“I hear them talking.” Jayde answered, looking down at me regretfully and removed her hand from under my shirt, “Your parents are awake.”  

Damn. “Maybe they won’t get up for a little while.” 

“Or maybe we finish this tonight and I go make us breakfast.” she offered. 

“Breakfast?” I raised an intrigued eyebrow. 

“Mhm. Whatever you want.”

“Pancakes.” I answered without missing a beat. Jayde made the best pancakes. Well, everything she made was the best, but I was in the mood for a classic weekend breakfast. 

She smirked and leaned down to kiss me. Once. Twice. Then a third when I pulled her down for just one more. “You got it.” 

“Love you.” I told her after she got out of bed and reached for the door. 

My beautiful girlfriend gave me a smile to make the butterflies in my stomach go mad, “Love you too.” I watched her hesitate to leave, looking at me in a way that made me think she wanted nothing more than to jump back into bed with me and stay there forever. Then she grabbed the door handle and said, “Try to get some more sleep. I’ll come get you when the food is ready.” 

I gave her a nod and she quietly disappeared out of my bedroom. 

It felt like my eyes were only shut for no more than a handful of seconds before someone was gently shaking me awake. There was hardly any time to be irritated because the first sight I saw was Jayde giving me a warm smile and sitting on the bed beside me. That lit up my insides immediately, causing me to sleepily smile back at her while I stretched and groaned. 

“Hey, sleepy girl,” She greeted fondly, running a hand through my messy hair, “Your plate is waiting for you downstairs.”

I hummed, grabbing her hand and bringing it to my lips, “But what if it was waiting for me upstairs? That way I wouldn’t have to get out of bed.” 

“Thought you’d say something like that.” Jayde remarked, lifting up her other hand to reveal a fresh mug of steaming coffee.

“Is that for me?” I asked as I sat up, more alert now that caffeine was within reach. She nodded. 

When my hand went toward it, Jayde pulled it back, just narrowly avoiding my grasp. I scowled at her and reached for it again, leaning over her lap to do so, but she just stretched her arm further away from me. 

“You’re gonna spill it.” She warned. 

The crooked grin she was smugly wearing made me grumble, “Then give it!” which resulted in an annoying chuckle from her. 

I tried to take the mug from her once again, but she hopped off the bed and took a step back into the middle of my room, “Looks like you’re gonna have to get up.” 

I glared at her, “You’re cruel.” 

Jayde dangled the mug in front of her, swishing it slowly so I could see the wave of coffee sloshing against the sides, “You want it or not?”

The temptation was enough to pull me out of the comfort of my bed, but I was feeling a tiny bit vengeful. I stormed over to her, plucked the mug out of her hand, then grabbed a fistful of her collar and pulled her in. Jayde was so caught off guard that her whole body froze while I led a fervent cadence. It was a few beats before she was able to shake off her shock and return it, her hands coming to rest on my hips. 

Then my mother called from the bottom of the stairs, “Do you need help waking her?”

Jayde and I broke away from each other so fast that some of the coffee spilled over my hand. I grimaced at both the scalding liquid and the fact that I completely forgot about where we were for a moment. Jayde seemed totally flustered, a blush coloring her cheeks and the back of her hand going to her mouth like me kissing her left visual evidence. 

“No!” Jayde quickly replied, “No, I got her up!” 

“Okay, good! The food is getting cold!” 

Jayde raised an alarmed eyebrow at me and waved towards my open door, “Shall we?”

I nodded, “Yeah, I think that’s a good idea.” 

Breakfast went by better than I was expecting it to. There was a healthy amount of pleasant small talk around the table. Questions about how well everyone slept and praise directed at Jayde cooking a delicious meal yet again. She was making a pretty good impression with my parents so far, despite the previous night’s events. In fact, it was almost like Ruben and his storm of negativity that blew through with him never happened. I honestly shouldn’t have been all that surprised, my parents haven’t exactly noticed or acknowledged his behavior before. Though I had wondered if they would react differently considering we had a guest. I suppose their easiest solution was to act like nothing was off. 

I finished my plate of pancakes and got up, walking to the kitchen to place my dishes in the sink and refill my empty cup with coffee. My dad had been leaning in his chair for the second half of breakfast, reading the morning paper with little interest, and when I returned to the dining room, he gave me a quick glance before returning his eyes to the paragraphs on the page. I sat back in my seat warily, knowing a glance like that would have a follow-up. 

“I’m going to run some errands today, Nadya.” He said, meeting my gaze and holding it this time, “I’d appreciate it if you joined me.” His expression made it clear that this wasn’t a suggestion. 

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Jayde’s shoulders tense. It reminded me of the way her hackles rise in her wolf form when she’s facing a threat. She didn’t particularly like my father, so I knew his request was not something she would be pleased about. I could see her jaw clench, see that she was preparing to open her mouth and invite herself on this outing. To get her attention, I set my mug down on the table, loud enough to draw her eyes towards me. There was only a short window of time where I could look at her and try to communicate silently without arousing suspicion from my parents. The brief warning glance I gave her was thankfully all she needed to back down for now. 

I addressed my father next, “Yeah, sure. I’d love to.” 

“Excellent. We’ll leave whenever you’re ready.” My father announced, folding his paper and getting up to go into his office. 

Jayde and I shared another look once he left the room and I could tell she was already rehearsing an argument to convince me to let her come with us. That wasn’t a discussion to have here while my mother was clearing the table and preparing to clean the mess in the kitchen. Jayde noticed what she was doing and stood up to take over. 

“Please, Mrs. Bishop, let me take care of it.” She insisted. 

My mother smiled at her, slumping her shoulders, “As long as you call me Winona.” 

“Deal.” Jayde replied with a small lopsided smile and accepted the stack of dishes the older woman handed to her. 

“I’m going upstairs to shower.” I told the two of them. 

Jayde’s eyes remained firmly locked on me until I disappeared around the corner. I spent most of my shower trying to think of a way to convince her to let me go. It wasn’t that I didn’t want her there. I actually never wanted her to leave my side while we were here. She was one of the only things that made me feel grounded and safe, but I knew that I had to do this alone. My father had made it pretty obvious that he only wanted me to go with him. Whatever the reason was, he wouldn’t want Jayde there. I had to face him without her.

I wasn’t surprised to find her waiting in my room once I got out of the shower. There wasn’t any anger that I could gauge from her, but I got the sense that she was ready to make her case by the way her shoulders were still tensed. I didn’t even have the chance to fully get dressed before she said exactly what I expected her to say. 

“I’m coming with you.” 

“Jay,” I said with a sigh while pulling my jeans up my legs, “You can’t.” 

“Like hell I can’t. We’ll think of an excuse.”

I didn’t face her until I pulled my shirt over my head, needing a little extra time to get my thoughts in order, “Look, this is just one of my dad’s methods. It’s probably not going to be fun, but this will give me the opportunity to convince him that what I’m doing is right.” 

“Nadya, I don’t like letting you out of my sight at all here. And you want to leave the house with your father? Without me?” She came closer, carefully grabbing my hands to hold it in hers. The look in her eyes was pleading and the furrow in her brow full of worry, “What if something happens?” 

“Listen to me,” I begged softly, caressing the back of her hands with my thumbs, “I’m not a wolf. No hunter is going to bother with me. Ruben has a broken arm and a bruised ego, so I’m pretty sure he’s in no shape to make a move right now. I can handle being out in public with my dad for a couple of hours.”

Her frown remained, “I’m not comfortable with this.” 

“Do you trust me?” 

“Of course.” She answered without any hesitation.

“Then trust that I can do this on my own.” 

Jayde’s expression started to slowly soften along with the rest of her body. There was something different about the way she regarded me now, and after a handful of quiet moments between us, she finally accepted it. “Okay.” 

“Thank you.” I squeezed her hand. When I tried to loosen my grip and pull away, she wouldn’t let me go, causing me to pause and look at her expectantly. 

She grimaced to herself as she tried to form words, “I’m sorry if it felt like I was trying to control you or something. I don’t want to do that.” 

“No,” My head shook to swiftly reassure her, “No, that’s not how I saw it at all.” 

“You’re sure?”

“Jayde, I know what your intentions are. You just want to protect me.” My free hand came up to cup her cheek. She looked so enthralled by my every word that I felt my face flush ever so slightly, “I love you for that. And I also love it when you have faith in me too.” 

She exhaled a breath that formed a beautiful smile across her lips. That made my flushed cheeks grow warmer, a smile of my own brightening my expression when her hand wrapped around my wrist while she lovingly leaned into my touch, “I’ve never doubted that there isn’t anything you can’t handle, but I still want to be there for you.” 

“I prefer it when you are.” I said. 

After a lingering moment of comfort for the both of us, I reluctantly pulled away from her and gave her a small goodbye smile. Jayde continued to watch me, wearing that special expression she gets when she looks at me, as I slowly stepped backwards and out of the room. Knowing that she will be here when I return made me feel ready for anything. If things went great, she would be there. If things went horribly, she would be there. I couldn’t ask for anything better.  

The car ride with my dad fell into a long awkward silence almost immediately. I could sense the tension filling the air inside like a noxious cloud, nearly choking me with anxiety. My father wasn’t typically a man of few words, but he always let a conversation simmer in moments like this before engaging. Maybe it was so he could go over what he would say in his head. Maybe it was intentional to leave me second guessing myself. Whatever his reasons, silence like this always made me feel like I was headed towards the chopping block. 

I opted for staring out the window as much as possible, trying to act nonchalant even though I ended up rolling it down a few inches to allow me to breathe normally. Perhaps I should have thought of a way to get Jayde to come with us. A tedious small talk between them would have been much better than this unbearable quiet. 

“What are you thinking about?” My dad asked. 

“Not much.” 

More silent moments passed between us. The hard thumping of my heart was like a ticking clock, each beat feeling longer than the last.  

“I hope your friend wasn’t too offended by Ruben’s behavior last night.” He said without much change in his tone, “That was embarrassing for me.” 

My head swiveled around in shock. My father has never outright acknowledged the way Ruben has acted before in my whole life. You couldn’t tell that by looking at him now though. He just continued to stare at the road before us with a calm expression as if he was in a business meeting. 

Eventually, I found my words, “I don’t think it really bothered her.” 

“It did.” He stated, “You don’t seriously think I fell for that allergic reaction excuse, do you? It was nice of her to try and pretend like he wasn’t the problem, but I know the truth. Your brother was acting extremely rude.” 

“Well… I’ll be sure to let her know you’re sorry.” 

“Thank you.” 

Just like that, we fell right back into the awkward silence. At least it gave me the time to ponder over his words that deeply confused me. Taking responsibility for Ruben in any capacity was the very last thing I ever expected him to do. He has always been so proud of his son. Getting him the best equipment for whatever sports he wanted to play. Making sure he got into the very best summer programs and camps in the country. Being blind to how cruel Ruben can be, not only to me, but to others as well. I may have been on the receiving end most often, but my brother was involved in a fair amount of fights and disputes when he was younger, and our father always blamed everyone besides Ruben for the incidents. 

I just couldn’t figure out why it changed now, of all times. 

It took me a little while to notice that we were heading into the city, through the route my dad usually takes for work. I figured he needed to do something at the dentist office, but we drove right past the building once it came into view. While curiosity was definitely poking at me, I didn’t ask just yet, figuring the question would answer itself soon enough. If I could avoid an awkward exchange with my father, then I would. 

He ended up taking us to Golden Gate Park, with its modest little trails that I enjoyed walking when I was a kid. My dad silently parked the car, turning it off, and stared out of the window for a minute or so. I stared at him with equal silence, trying to decipher his unreadable expression and waiting for him to tell me what to do. 

“Come take a walk with me, Nadya.” He said without looking at me and got out of the car. 

I stepped out of the car next, feeling my pulse start to pick up, and followed my dad. Under normal circumstances, walking through here would have been soothing. Being consumed by trees and nature in the middle of a densely populated city was a rare feeling that made me feel grounded. It was a completely different world in here. Jayde would love it, especially all of the hidden little gems nestled within the three mile long, half a mile wide, strip of park. But my surroundings did little to soothe the feeling of dread hanging over me right now. 

My father and I walked side by side without so much as a word between us. People probably assumed we were just strangers heading in the same direction. A small part of me wished we were. I knew my dad was waiting for the right moment to bring up whatever it was he wanted to confront me about. 

He didn’t speak until we were walking along a path without many other people around, “I want you to tell me the real reason you left school.” 

My heart skipped a beat, but I did my best to act confused, “What do you mean? You already know.” 

“I know what you tried to tell me.” He said, finally looking directly at me for the first time since breakfast, “But I know that isn’t the truth.” 

“Why would I lie to you?” I asked with a defensive frown. 

His expression grew very serious, “I was contacted by some people a little over a year ago, law enforcement of some kind, I think. Nadya, they acted like you had gone missing. They were looking for you and said there was no trace of where you had gone.” 

That information made me stop dead in my tracks. Of course I knew the hunters that figured out I had been involved with Jayde’s escape from the hospital knew who I was, but I didn’t think they’d contact my parents on the other side of the country. Here I thought we had taken care of it in time. I was very wrong. 

My father continued, “I told them there had to be a misunderstanding. That there was no way you would abandon your responsibilities unless something bad happened to you. But here you show up, spinning some story about a doctors without borders program, having your friend cover for you, and you expect me to believe any of it.”

“Dad…” I started through a labored breath. The pace my heart had taken increased so quickly that my hands started to shake. I needed to think of an explanation. Fast. “I-I didn’t want to tell you… I just… I went through a lot last year, okay? I had so much on my shoulders and I was all alone.” This wasn’t the most dignified excuse, but it was still rooted in some truth, “It was too much. I know I should have just come to you, but I needed to figure it out on my own, so I left everything behind for a little while.” 

He studied me closely, looking for any indication of a lie, but I held his unwavering gaze. After a tense few seconds, he let out a sigh and looked away, “I push you hard for a reason, Nadya. You need to be independent. There isn’t a single person you can rely on, not even me. I need you to build something for yourself. To throw it all away because of something ridiculous like that is not how you survive in the world.”

“I didn’t throw it all away.” I quickly replied, “I wasn’t lying when I said I was working and going to school.” 

He let out a scoff and shook his head, “Right.” 

“I swear.” 

“Nadya—” 

“Listen.” I insisted, stepping into his line of sight, “I found something. It might not be conventional, but it is exactly what I wanted when I made the decision to become a doctor. I help people. They even trust me enough to run the clinic that I work at. I’m practically my own boss, just like you are. And in my free time, I study as hard as I can to make sure I have the skills I need to save the lives that come into my care.” 

To my surprise, his stern expression actually started to fade. He was clearly still apprehensive, but I could see he was beginning to accept my words. “You’ve always been an extremely responsible girl. I know I have to take that into account.”

“Then, please… believe me.” 

“I do.” 

A wave of relief flowed gracefully over me like the breeze through the trees surrounding us. It felt like I hit a milestone that I’ve been chiseling away at for years. Before I could get too excited about it though, he spoke again. 

“But don’t settle for something meager like this. I suggest you reevaluate where you are. Or at the very least, think of a way to expand on what you’re doing. Get a real education. Earn more money. Who knows,” He lifted his shoulders in a plain shrug, “This might end up being something to be proud of one day.” 

Those words crushed me. I didn’t think my life at the Lodge was meager. For me, it was already something I took great pride in, especially after everything I’ve been through. Of course, my dad couldn’t know the full extent of just how crazy my life has been for the past year, but after putting my heart and soul into making my case, I expected… something. Instead I got him telling me I missed the mark for his standards yet again. I wasn’t entirely sure why that hurt as much as it did. 

This wasn’t a total loss, I realized, because I had actually gotten through to him. He believed my story and accepted it as something to be worked on. Despite the way I felt about his opinions, I still managed to accomplish what I set out to do. There won’t be so many questions and doubts about me going forward. If I gave him the occasional update on the path of my career, he would be satisfied. Just not proud. 

Not really knowing how to respond to him, I simply said, “Yeah.” 

My dad smiled at me. Genuinely. “I’m glad we had this talk. I was worried about you.” 

I tried to smile back, “I know, I’m glad too.”

“Come on, let’s finish this walk and then get some lunch.” He motioned towards me to follow him, which I did without question. 

The rest of our time in the park went well. It almost felt like a normal father and daughter outing. He brought up specific places in the park that I favored over others, such as the museum and the hidden Japanese tea garden, reminiscing about good days we’ve all had there as a family. It was an odd feeling to be interacting with my dad in this way. I haven’t experienced something like this since I was a kid. I may not fully trust it, but I was still feeling hopeful that perhaps things really have changed between us now. 

After having something to eat, my father took us back to his office, explaining that he actually did have to run some errands in the city, and left me alone in the car. I relaxed in my seat, trying to come to terms with the fact that I really could build something with my father and mother. I could have the kind of relationship with them that I have longed for since I was a teenager. 

Then the doubt crept back in as I remembered one glaring subject that I still needed to broach. Who I am, being with Jayde, could be the thing that could tear down everything I have spent this entire weekend working towards. And the thing that nagged at me was that I didn’t know which way it would go. They could accept me. Or they could completely reject me. I had about as much of an answer about the outcome as flipping a coin did. 

While I was deep in my mind, my phone vibrated, pulling me away from my thoughts. I fished it out of my bag and looked to see a text message from Jayde. 

Just checking in. You ok? -J

I smiled at her concern and shot a reply. 

I’m fine. We had a talk. Took some convincing, but I think he finally believes me. How are you holding up?

Another message came through in less than a minute. 

I’ve been cooking. With your mom. 

Imagining that made my smile turn into a grin and I couldn’t hold back a small laugh. 

I guess we’ve both had an interesting day. Save some goodies for me, will you?

The sound of a sudden car alarm down the street made me glance up in time to see my dad exiting his office. He was taking his time locking it up, tucking some folders under his arm. My phone buzzed almost immediately with Jayde’s quick reply. 

What will you give me for it? 

I scoffed and rolled my eyes at how cocky she was. 

Maybe you’ll find out tonight ;)

I startled slightly when my father opened the car door and tried to hide a blush that formed across my cheeks at the possibilities with Jayde in my room later. He thankfully didn’t seem to notice anything off, simply just buckled in and started the engine. I sent one more text to Jayde, letting her know we would be heading back soon after a few more errands, and put my phone away so that I wouldn’t be distracted by any more flirty messages. 

Evening was approaching by the time we returned. As soon as I opened the front door, the scents of something delicious cooking in the kitchen wafted right in the face. It gave the whole house a cozy feeling that settled whatever nerves and doubts I had lingering in my head. I didn’t have to think about coming out until tomorrow. For tonight, I wanted to just enjoy my victory. 

Jayde appeared from around the corner and it took everything in me not to run into her arms. The gorgeous smile she gave me brought my insides to life, pulling me towards her like a magnet. I might not be able to embrace her like I wanted just yet, but being as close to her as I possibly could made me feel so much better about everything. 

“You’re back.” She noted, her eyes not leaving mine. 

My dad answered before I could, “Yes, and it smells like you’ve been busy.” 

Jayde forced herself to look away from me and over at my father, “Yeah, Winona wanted me to give her some tips on cooking. We made lunch earlier and we’ve been working on a roast for dinner.” 

“How nice. I can’t wait to taste it.” He replied pleasantly and made his way into the kitchen. 

Jayde and I lingered in the living room for a few extra moments. She glanced over her shoulder and took another step towards me until she was close enough to reach up and brush her thumb against my cheek. The small touch was brief and light, but it still elicited a sigh from my lungs and let the tension seep out of my body with it. 

“Are you okay?” She asked under her breath. 

I nodded even though her gentle question made my father’s words resurface in my mind. “He’s just… a hard man to please.” 

“He doesn’t know a damn thing about you or what you’ve accomplished. He doesn’t deserve to.” She said protectively. 

“He’s my dad, Jay.” I reminded her, “It still hurts.” 

“I know, my love.” Jayde risked a quick peck to my temple and I was grateful for her comfort. “But remember that he isn’t the only person who can be proud of you. I’m proud of you. And spending time with your mom today told me that she’s proud of you too.” 

I looked at her in surprise and her smile grew broader. 

“You’re someone to be proud of. If your dad can’t see that, then he’s blind.” After she let that sink in for a second, she grabbed my hand and squeezed it. I squeezed her right back, wanting nothing more than to kiss her right now. “Dinner will be ready in a bit. Why don’t you relax on the couch and I’ll get you something to drink.” 

“That sounds good to me.” I agreed and motioned upstairs, “I’m just gonna go to the bathroom real quick.” 

Jayde nodded and we both stepped away from each other again. I was starting to really hate doing that. I’ve spent the last few months just trying to get used to the fact that I had her back. It felt like every goodbye could be our last. Sure, it wasn’t that big of a deal anymore to be separated from her at the Lodge, but I felt like I needed her by my side here. It was too painful to not be in the same room as her. To not be near here. To not touch her. 

Splashing cold water in my face while I was in the bathroom helped clear my mind. I took a minute to just breathe slowly and feel the droplets of water run down my skin. If I closed my eyes, I could pretend that I was standing in the rain. That made me smile, as the rain always does, and I took a deep inhale. Releasing it from my lungs as slowly as I could cemented my space in reality. Feeling a lot better and a lot calmer, I dried my face off and left the bathroom.

I hesitated to descend the stairs and instead found my feet carrying me towards Ruben’s room. There were very few times throughout my life that I approached his door willingly, but my reasons this time didn’t have anything to do with my brother. I wanted to see what Jayde has done to the space to make it bearable. 

A huge part of me expected his belongings to be tarnished in some way, or see that she left her mark on his space just to enrage him, but the room was untouched. Jayde’s bag rested in the middle of the floor, right where she left it when we arrived yesterday, and I got the impression that she didn’t want anything of hers to touch anything of his. I understood that sentiment completely. 

I knelt down in front of the bag, unzipping it. There wasn’t really a clear plan for what I was doing at first, but I soon realized I was looking for something I could wear that belonged to her. Something that would make me feel closer to her when I couldn’t be physically. My hands rifled through the contents of her bag until I pulled out a flannel that would satisfy my needs perfectly. 

With her belongings disturbed, I saw a glimpse of the handgun that had been buried deep under everything. I pursed my lips, both grateful and wary of its presence in my parents’ home. At least Jayde hadn’t used it on my brother last night. Though a part of me still wished that she had had the weapon on her once I saw that he had a gun of his own. My brother could have killed her, could have taken her away from me again for good. And then he probably would have killed me too. 

It was a terrifying outcome to think about, so I shook myself out of it and rearranged Jayde’s clothes to hide the gun again, zipping the duffle bag back up. I left and quickly stopped by my room to drop off the flannel before returning down stairs. 

Dinner went by with not even half of the tension and awkwardness as the night before, which was a huge relief. I was actually pretty happy to pretend that the drama with Ruben didn’t happen. The atmosphere around the table almost felt… normal. 

“Nadya, Jayde tells me that you run your own clinic at the shelter you two work at.” My mother said. 

I suppose the Lodge technically was a shelter, but I couldn’t stop a small amused grin at Jayde’s choice of cover story, “Yeah, I do.”

“Do you get a lot of people needing medical help?” 

“More than you’d think actually.” I confirmed with a nod, “The people that come through, their lives aren’t easy and some days surviving is all they can do. It’s why I chose to be there. Places like the shelter I work at don’t have the kind of medical staff on hand that’s essential, and almost all of the people that are there can’t afford proper treatment. We’re lucky to have a few benefactors that give us the funds for supplies and equipment, but before I was there, the clinic didn’t get as much attention as it needed. I’ve been doing all I can to make it better since they accepted me.” 

My mom’s expression was incredibly warm and it tugged at my earliest memories, back to a time where I felt like this house really was a home. “That’s very admirable of you, Nadya. You’ve always been such a compassionate person.” 

She reached out and grabbed my hand, giving it a motherly pat, and it finally dawned on me that her expression was pride. Jayde was right. I have spent so much time believing that I wasn’t worth any recognition, convincing myself that I didn’t need it, that I almost couldn’t accept it when it was so blatant in front of me. 

“Thanks, mom.” I said, embracing the genuine connection I had with her in this moment. 

Jayde caught my eye again and the feeling of warmth in my chest pooled outwards through the rest of my body at the way she looked at me. Her love for me was unmistakable with that special glint in her dark irises and I was momentarily worried about one of my parents recognizing it too. Then the corner of her mouth curled up a little more and I forgot about everything but her for a beat. 

“Yes,” My dad chimed in, yanking me back to earth, “She’s on a decent path, but Nadya does have a lot of work to do with plenty of room for improvement. I think we can all agree on that.” 

Before that weight I felt earlier when talking with my dad could fully settle on my shoulders, Jayde spoke up, “Actually, Richard, I’ve seen just how much Nadya has accomplished firsthand. She’s built that clinic up from nothing. We’re incredibly lucky to have her there.” Her eyes had narrowed at him, the hint of a growl bitten back in her tone. 

He chuckled at her, seemingly amused by her coming to my defense, “I didn’t say it wasn’t impressive, I only meant that there’s more ambition to be led in the medical field.” 

Jayde hummed in mock thought, “I guess you’re right.” Then she looked at me, “If you work at a real hospital after obtaining your medical degree, you’ll be able to afford your own Cadillac one day too, Nadya.” 

Just enough sarcasm was used in that statement to be mistaken for authenticity. Thankfully, it seemed to go right over my dad’s head. 

“Oh, she could get a lot more than a Cadillac.” He said. 

Relieved that Jayde’s snide comment didn’t stir up any unrest, I shrugged and nodded, “It’s definitely a possibility for me.”

My dad looked pleased, “That’s good to hear.” 

“Enough work talk,” My mom said, “I want to hear about what you’ve been doing for fun, Nadya.” 

The remainder of the evening was spent talking about the people I’ve met, some of the hiking trails I’ve explored, and all of the photographs I’ve taken. I even went into some detail about the journeys I’ve been on with Jayde, though it was a challenge to try and dance around the real reasons for our so called adventures. Pretty much all of them had to deal with life and death. I couldn’t imagine my parents would find that anecdote to be exciting, even if I did have fond memories tied in with the terrifying ones. 

Nighttime fell and I eventually found myself back in my bedroom after everyone said their goodnights. I let myself get cozy in Jayde’s flannel and some sleep shorts. It was immediately comforting to have her scent so close to me, but I wanted the real thing. To have her with me already so I could touch her and hold her and kiss her like I so desperately needed to. 

I paced around my room impatiently, trying to think of a way to pass the time. My old bookshelf drew my attention and I browsed my teenage novel collection for something to read. There was one book that caught my eye, something that I used to adore when I was younger, about a supernatural romance. What I could remember from reading it was that it was pretty dreadful and unbearably heterosexual, but I figured I would give it shot for my own entertainment tonight. 

I pulled the book off the shelf and walked over to settle on my bed. The lamp on my nightstand was perfect for late night reading. Not too dim and not too bright, giving the room a nice ambience. Then I put my glasses on and opened the book to read while I waited for Jayde to come.

[real-life-pine-tree]

Rehabilitation: Roller Rink Bonding (3/?)

Side effects may include a loss of self-identity and individuality, frequent nightmares, questioning your own existence, severe mental trauma, constant panic attacks, spontaneous crying at random moments, and a strong desire to stay with loved ones at all cost. Co-written with @violetganache42​. Takes place between Chapters 6 and 7 of Arc-V Aftermath.

Yuto struggled to maintain his balance, nearly falling onto the floor as he tried to make some movement and eventually heading his way towards the railing for support. Out of all the activities he has done with his mom, this was definitely something he has never done this before. He looked down at his feet, which were wearing roller skates and then directed his head to where the other people were. A lot of them were moving at a stable—and even swift—pace all around the rink while also making sure to not lose their balance. Even Yuya has easily gotten the hang of skating thanks to Alex, yet unlike the loaned Duel Skates, he was able to control when to stop since there weren't any duels involved. The eggplant-haired teen was good at dueling, being a knightly gentleman, maintaining a nice appearance, memorizing Lono's lasagna recipe and her other homemade meals, and keeping a rather strong body figure, but roller skating definitely wasn't one of them.

"Come on, Yuto!" Yuya encouraged. "It's easy!"

"Easy for you to say!" Yuto pointed out, stumbling once more before falling onto the floor.

Sora, on the other hand, was skating with ease. "This is easy!" he exclaimed. "I had to memorize too many dances for Duel Academy's galas, so I'm already quick on my feet!" He showed no hesitation with his skating skills as he zipped by Yuto, much to the eggplant-haired teen's annoyed disappointment.

"Do you need help?" Yoko called out, already skating with Yusho.

"N-No, I'm fine," Yuto lied, wiping a forming tear away from his eye. Why did Yoko have to remind him so much of Lono?

"Doesn't look like it," Yuya said. He proceeded to grab his cousin's hands and pull him back up on his feet.

"What are you doing?" Yuto asked.

"I'm teaching you how to roller skate!" Yuya cheerfully answered. "So just relax and follow my lead!"

Holding his cousin's hand, Yuya started his tutorial off by going at a steady pace, making sure to go slow but not too fast so that they can at least sustain their balance. Some time later, Yuto noticed Yuya was humming a song, spiking his curiosity.

"Are you...humming?" Yuto asked.

"Yeah," Yuya answered. "Mom told me the easiest way to skate is by moving to the beat of Pinball Wizard."

Yuto was baffled. "Pinball Wizard...?"

"You've never heard of that song?" Yuya asked.

"No," Yuto admitted.

"It kinda goes something like this," Yuya explained. He started singing. "Ever since I was a young boy I've played the silver ball. From Soho down to Brighton, I must have played them all. But I ain't seen nothing like him in any amusement hall. That deaf dumb and blind kid sure plays a mean pinball!"

Yuya continued humming and singing as he and Yuto skated to the beat of The Who's 1969 single. But Yuto was more focused on the song's lyrics than skating.

"I don't get it," the Phantom Knights user said. "It's impossible for someone to play pinball if they can't see and hear."

"Technically Tommy isn't really blind and deaf," Yuya explained. "He witnessed his birth father kill the man who raised him, causing his mom to tell him he didn't see or hear that."

That didn't help Yuto. "Tommy...?"

"It's the name of the Pinball Wizard," Yuya clarified.

Are there more songs about this Tommy person? Why exactly did his biological father kill his adopted one? Did his mother tell him he didn't see or hear that murder to make sure he wouldn't be traumatized by it? Yuto always knew songs have a meaning to them, but he never figured they can create a story that share a common lore to them. He might have to do some research to learn more about Tommy and what songs The Who did about him.

"That's it!" Yuya suddenly exclaimed.

"What's it?" Yuto asked.

"You're skating!" Yuya explained

Yuto looked around at his surroundings to see how he was moving fluidly across the rink. He then glanced down at his feet to see they have gotten the hang of skating. He was surprised with how well he was going.

"I... I'm doing it," Yuto said. He started smiling wide and laughing. "I'm actually skating!"

He accelerated in front of Yuya and dashed by Yoko, Yusho, and Sora as he basked in the glory of roller skating for the first time. He usually doesn't act like this, but it feels too long since he last had a chance to do some family bonding. Seeing how the Sakakis are also part of his family, he wanted to make this moment count.

"Yuto, slow down!" Yoko called out. "I don't want you to get hurt!"

"I don't want you to get hurt, sweetie!"

Yuto's eyes widened in alarm. "Mom?" he asked aloud.

The words Yoko said. He heard them before. As quickly as she spoke them, he found himself back into the past when he was younger. He still had short hair with his light purple bangs covering his eyes and wore baggy clothes at that time when his only friends were Dark Rebellion XYZ Dragon and his mom. It was prior to meeting Shay when he was the only person in Heartland who stood out like a sore thumb because he wasn't the kind of person who wasn't as bright, cheery, and colorful as everyone else.

From what he could tell from the triggered flashback, he was at his home street, learning how to ride a bike.

"Yuto, are you sure you want to do this?" Lono asked.

"Y-Yes, mom," Yuto shyly muttered.

"Alright," Lono said reassuringly. "Let me know when I can let go."

The two headed down the sidewalk at a slow but secure pace as Yuto pedaled the bike. His eyes widened behind his bangs. "I'm doing it!" he exclaimed. "I'm actually doing it!"

He gradually picked up the speed of his bike and grew more excited as seconds went by, leading up to the point where he said Lono could let go. For his first time riding a bike, he couldn't believe how well he was doing.

"Just don't go too fast!" Lono called out. "I don't want you to get hurt, sweetie!"

Distracted by him remembering that day, Yuto nearly ran into the wall of the skating rink, with Yuya catching him—and hitting the wall—just in time. "What happened?" Yuya asked.

"Sorry," Yuto said. "I...got distracted."

Sora let out a laugh as he skated by. "You, distracted?" he asked. "You weren't distracted when Obelisk Force attacked!"

What he's saying was Yuto never gets sidetracked that easily…unless Lulu is involved. What was he even thinking about that almost got him skating towards the wall?

"Your mom said something that reminded me of my mom," Yuto told Yuya. "Then I thought about the time she taught me how to ride a bike."

"Stop talking like that," Yuya said. "My mom is also your aunt."

"I know..." Yuto said. "But it still feels weird." He still can't get over the fact that Yoko reminds him of Lono because they were sisters.

"Come on, Yoot," Yuya encouraged. "Embrace the familial connection. Your last name is Osaku, but you're still a Sakaki."

Yuto raised an eyebrow. "Yoot?" he repeated.

"Yeah, it's the same nickname Yugo calls you," Yuya explained.

"I know," Yuto recalled. "But you don't have to call me that." He may have stayed with his cousin, but that was when his soul was fused with their counterparts and they didn't knew they were related all this time. It was obvious that it may take a while for him to warm up to this recent discovery.

"But we're family," Yuya emphasized. "Relatives give each other fun nicknames."

"You got that right, tomato head," Sora agreed as he skated by.

This was a clear example of familial nicknames: Sora calling Yuya "tomato head" for obvious reasons up to the point where it doesn't even deserve an explanation. Yuto honestly never thought about giving or being given nicknames in a familial manner; he was more used to those in friendships and relationships. Then again, he did grew up as an only child for most of his life. So maybe he could give this nickname thing a try.

"Okay...odd-eyes," Yuto said, noticing Yuya's new dual eye colors.

The first thing Yuya thought about was his ace monster, Odd-Eyes Pendulum Dragon. It actually makes sense on why he would be given that nickname because he was one of the first Pendulum monsters that made him into the pioneer of Pendulum Summoning.

"Now you're gettin' the hang of it!" Yuya replied, playfully punching Yuto on the shoulder.

Yuto rubbed his arm before getting back to skating with his family. He made sure he was at a close distance to where Yuya was because he wanted to spend some bonding time with him; although the stuff he demonstrated was typically something siblings would do, they weren't strictly just for siblings. Since Yuto didn't have any brothers or sisters growing up, hanging out with his own cousin was the next best thing.

"I've been meaning to ask you something," Yuya said as the two cousins skated. "What do you see in Lulu?"

"Hmm?" Yuto questioned.

"You heard me," Yuya said. "Since she and Zuzu are technically the same person, I must know why you ended up falling for her."

"Because she's an angel combined with a princess," Yuto answered, smiling softly. "When I'm with her, it feels as if my other half."

"But I'm your other half aside from Yugo and Yuri," Yuya pointed out.

"Not like that," Yuto explained. "According to Greek mythology, humans were originally created with four arms, four legs, and a head with two faces. Fearing their power, Zeus split them into two separate parts, condemning them to spend their lives in search of their other halves."

Yuya snorted a laugh at that. "Except that didn't happen to us," he pointed out.

"But when I met Lulu, I felt complete," Yuto explained. "I was initially captivated by her beauty, but as we spent more time together, I felt a natural connection with her. Don't you feel that with Zuzu?"

"Sort of," Yuya answered. "But it's not like she's my girlfriend. She can be nice, but there's usually nothing sweet about her."

"What about when your fingertips faintly touch hers?" Yuto asked. "Or when she runs a hand through your hair? Don't you feel anything when you're with her?"

"She doesn't touch my hair," Yuya recalled. "Well she hasn't done that in the past, but now..."

He wasn't sure how to say it exactly, but Yuto knew what he meant: Zuzu has been touching his hair lately. But it wasn't casual touches. She gently caressed it with the occasional murmurs of 'you're still Yuya'.

"She has been touching your hair lately?" Yuto asked.

"Yeah," Yuya answered. "A lot."

This was somewhat peculiar, not because of when she has started touching and stroking, but why she has been doing it. There was something about that phrase that got Yuto thinking. "You're still Yuya…" Was it due to him and his counterparts becoming Zarc? No…but it definitely had something to do with him… Was it because of him Awakening? Most likely; after all, it was caused by Zarc's will to reunite his reincarnations as one…and made Yuya's hair stand up more, occasionally making it bear a resemblance to Zarc's hairstyle.

"Do you think it might have to do with what Zarc tried to do with us?" Yuto asked.

"The whole berserk thing?" Yuya asked in response. He briefly ruffled his own hair. "I guess... I think that caused my hair to spike up."

He figured it may have something to do with that. Looking back at the first few times he Awakened, it does show why Zuzu would say something like that. His hair sticking up reminded them of Zarc and the Yu-Salad absorbing each other and reviving their incarnation was traumatizing.

Yuto suddenly smirked. "But at least my hair is better," he said.

"Yuto!" Yuya exclaimed.

"It's true," Yuto said as he skated circles around Yuya. He brushed his bangs back. "Lulu can't get enough of it."

Yuya made a slight pouting face at Yuto's boastful remark. Since when did it become a contest to see who has the best haircut?

"You're wrong!" Yuya replied. "My hair is clearly better than yours! Why else would Aura fall for my devilish charm?"

"I beg to differ," Yuto said. "My hair is much softer than yours. Lulu even thinks it was because of an angel's blessing."

"But mine doesn't stand out as much," Yuya added.

"Mine actually has a more natural coloring," Yuto remarked.

"Tell that to your purple bangs!" Yuya pointed out.

"You're both wrong!" Sora chimed in as he skated by. "Yuri has the best hair!"

That was something Yuto and Yuya can agree on: their Fusion counterpart clearly doesn't have the best hair. Who on Earth would be insane enough to even fall for a cabbage-haired Predaplant user like Yuri?

"So... About Yugo..." Yuya realized.

"Probably," Yuto admitted. "Rin seems to like that stray lock of hair near his right cheek."

"But when was the last time he washed it?" Yuya asked.

"Probably never," Yuto answered. "Which means I still have the softest hair."

"But doesn't your head feel heavy?" Yuya asked. "'Cause it looks like you have too much hair."

This sentence slightly caught Yuto off guard, mainly due to the fact that his hair was the thickest out of all of his counterparts. "I don't have too much hair," he clarified. "It's thicker."

"I'll be the judge of that," Yuya said.

He skated forward to try and touch Yuto's eggplant-shaped hair to see if it was thicker or not. As he leaned towards him and extended his arm out, the latter attempted to push him away a little because he needed some personal space, but that only increased their chances of them losing their balance and it quickly became a 100% probability rate as the two stumbled and fell onto the floor of the rink. With his cousin recovering from the fall, Yuya took advantage of it and placed his hand on the black locks.

"Yep!" Yuya said, touching his own hair with his other hand. "It definitely feels thicker."

Yuto sat up on the floor right as Yuya stopped touching their hair and Sora zipped by them yet again, but this time, it was to see if they were alright. At least the tomato-haired teen was now convinced that Yuto’s hair wasn't as heavy as he initially thought.

"Are you two done goofing off?" Sora asked. "Mr. and Mrs. Sakaki said they'll take us out for pizza."

Yuya's eyes lit up with glee whereas Yuto was more amazed to hear what Sora mentioned. After all that rambling about hair, pizza for lunch sounded delicious right about now.

"Pizza?" Yuya happily asked. He got back on his feet. "I'm in!"

"Me too," Yuto replied, also getting back up.

"But I'm serious," Sora said. "Compared to you two, Yuri has the best hair."

"Why would you say that?" Yuya asked as Yuto chuckled in disagreement.

"Have you seen those perfectly-coiffed purple and pink locks?" Sora asked in response. "Yuri is clearly the more sophisticated counterpart."

"You're wrong," Yuto said. "Lulu grew up in a wealthy environment. If anything, she's more sophisticated than Yuri."

"Oh, so we're getting the girls in on it?" Yuya asked.

"Why not?" Yuto asked in response. "Her hair is absolutely gorgeous."

The three boys continued talking about all eight counterparts' hair as they skated to where Yoko and Yusho were so that they can put on their normal shoes and head over to the pizzeria for lunch. Yuto never would have imagined finding himself bonding with his extended family, especially his two cousins, one of which happened to be his own counterpart. He also couldn't believe how a simple song could help him overcome his inability to roller skate and lead him into a debate about hairstyles. All in all, he was glad he discovered his relations with his extended family because he was welcomed with open arms thanks to Yuya. He may have been born an Osaku, but he was really glad to be a Sakaki.