#also she wore sindoor

[iftitah]

okay quick

[aahanna]

The Story of Solah Shringar

The Indian bride is the epitome of grace, elegance, and beauty. Her attire and traditional Indian bridal jewelry catch every eye and leave a lasting impression on everyone. While her wedding outfit accentuates her best features, her Indian bridal jewelry adds a subtle shine and a touch of sophistication to her entire look.

As per tradition, the Indian bride embellishes herself with 16 adornments on her wedding day. These adornments are called Solah Shringar. This ritual has been practiced since ancient times and is an integral part of bridal preparations.

The story behind the Solah Shringar features Rati, the wife of Kamdev, the Hindu god of love. Rati engaged in severe penance to appease Goddess Lakshmi. She was then blessed with the 16 adornments from Lakshmi and wore them to impress and marry Kamdev.

16 adornments (16 sringar)are

1. Sindoor

The first adornment is Sindoor, also known as kumkum or vermillion. Sindoor holds a special place as it marks the beginning of a woman’s new journey as a bride. Sindoor is applied by the groom on the forehead between the hair partition of the bride. The bride then continues to wear sindoor throughout her married life.

2. Hair care (Kesh Sringar):

We now focus on the ‘Kesh’, or hair. The Indian bride embellishes her hair using fragrant flowers and glittering headpieces. Traditionally, the bride made three braids that represented three holy rivers, Ganga, Yamuna, and Saraswati, and the trinity of the Hindu gods Brahma, Vishnu, and Mahesh. The fragrance of flowers keeps the bride fresh throughout the day and her Indian bridal jewelry embellishes her hairdo, adding another layer of elegance and beauty to her overall look.

3. Maangtika

The part of the forehead where the maangtika rests is believed to be the home of Ajna Chakra or the third eye. When the bride wears the piece of Indian bridal jewelry on her special day, she is believed to be connected with her third eye and has the ability to control her emotions and activate her knowledge, wisdom, courage, and willpower.

4. Bindi

The bindi also takes us to the third eye. Bindi comes from the Sanskrit word bindu, which means ‘point’ or ‘dot’. The bindi is closely associated with improving concentration and retaining energy. It is one of the most popular adornments worn by the Indian bride and is known internationally.

5.Kohl or Kajal

From the forehead, we move to the eyes. Kohl, kajal, surma, kanmashi, kaadige, kaatuka, and kan mai are some names for one of the oldest natural beauty products in the world. Kajal accentuates the eyes of the bride and is believed to ward off the evil eye in various cultures. The darkening around the eyes also protects the wearer from the harsh rays of the sun.

Kajal is an essential element of the solah shringar and makes the eyes look more prominent. It is undoubtedly a beautiful way to enhance the natural beauty of the bride.

6 .Karn Phool or Earrings

A wedding day look cannot be completed without a set of dangling earrings. Karn Phool is a Sanskrit term that translates to ‘flower of the ears’ and is an essential part of the solah shringar.

7 .Nath(nose ring)

The nose ring is another beautiful element of the Indian bride’s attire and is a symbol of valor, fertility, and spirituality. The large nose rings hooked onto the hair with a chain take the bride a step closer to creating her ideal look. It is one of the most ethnic elements of Indian bridal jewelry and a wedding day look is surely incomplete without it.

8 .Haar or Necklace

The one thing that brings the whole look together is the necklace. Necklaces are said to represent safety and abundance and are believed to help the wearer control their emotions better. Some necklaces feature specific motifs or gemstones that are believed to bring good luck and ward off evil spirits.

9 .Bajuband

This element of traditional Indian bridal jewelry is worn on the upper arm. The bajuband is believed to keep evil spirits away and protects the wearer. The Indian bride can embellish her wedding outfit with all sorts of armbands that are encrusted with diamonds and other colorful gemstones.

10 .Bangles, Bracelets, Choodiyan

Bangles and the Indian bride are inseparable. They’re a part of traditional Indian bridal jewelry that a woman always wears. It is believed that bangles and bracelets bring health, luck, and prosperity to the wearer and are more than a jewelry item or accessory for the traditional Indian woman. There are various wedding ceremonies related to bangles and bracelets across cultures that show us their significance in Indian culture.

11 .Hathphool and Aarsi

The hathphool is a clever mix of a bangle and a ring. Bringing the best of both together, this element of traditional Indian bridal jewelry embellishes the hand and wrist of the bride. The interesting crossover of the two pieces surely adds more flavor to the wedding day look.

A thumb ring known as Aarsi is also worn by some brides. Aarsi contains a small mirror. This mirror allows the bride to catch a glimpse of the groom since she is covered in a veil and cannot see the groom’s face.

12 . Mehndi

Henna, commonly known as mehndi, is undoubtedly one of the most amusing parts of a traditional Indian wedding. It is believed that mehndi brings good luck and joy to the bride. The darkness of the mehndi represents the strength of the bond between the bride and the groom. The solah shringar of the bride is incomplete without her hands and feet embellished with beautiful mehndi designs that add to her overall wedding day look.

13 . Kamarband (waist band)

The use of the kamarband, or waistband, is scarce in North Indian weddings but it is an important part of a South Indian bride’s trousseau. The piece of Indian bridal jewelry is adorned with gemstones and is used to accentuate the female’s body and keep her bridal saree in place.

14 . Anklets and Toe Rings

Commonly known as payal and bichhu, these elements of traditional Indian bridal jewelry embellish the feet of the bride. Payals can be recognized by the beautiful chime sounds they make whenever the bride walks. Toe rings are seen as a sign of marriage and a bride wears them until the death of her husband.

15 . Itar

Itar is the perfume that a bride applies to freshen her aura and stay fragrant throughout her special day.

16. Wedding Outfit

Finally, the one thing that clubs every element together and brings the bride’s imagination to life is the wedding outfit. The traditional Indian bride wore the classic red wedding outfit but with the evolution of Indian weddings, other colors have started to take center stage as well.

Source

[news365timesindia]

[ad_1] Priyanka Chopra and Parineeti Chopra were among the many celebrities who observed the Karwa Chauth fast last night. The cousins shared pictures from the celebrations on Instagram. While Priyanka captioned her post, “To all those celebrating…Happy Karwa Chauth and yes I’m filmy,” Parineeti’s caption read, “My moon and my stars…Happy Karwa Chauth, love of my life.” Priyanka Chopra and Parineeti Chopra’s simple mehndi Priyanka’s post featured special moments from her and Nick Jonas’s Karwa Chauth celebrations. In the first click, Priyanka breaks her fast by drinking water from Nick’s hands as they video call her mom. Meanwhile, the second photo shows her reading a note from Nick, and the third is a selfie of the couple as the actor shows her off her mehndi, featuring Nick’s initials and birth date (9.16.92). As for Parineeti’s post, she shared several photos capturing her and Raghav performing Karwa Chauth rituals. In the first click, Raghav fixes Parineeti’s sindoor. In one picture, the politician can be seen playfully pulling his wife’s hair. The actor also shared pictures of her performing rituals with other married women and showing her mehndi to Raghav. Like her elder cousin, Parineeti also chose a simple design which included two hearts connected with a curved line. Decoding Priyanka’s minimal look Priyanka chose a laidback ensemble for her Karwa Chauth celebrations. She wore a vibrant pink velvet tracksuit. She styled the ensemble with colourful bangles, dainty gold bracelets, jhumkis, rings, and mangalsutra. She tied her hair in a side-parted messy updo, and for the glam, she kept her face bare. Pink lips, feathered brows, and sindoor rounded off the look. What did Parineeti wear for Karwa Chauth? Parineeti chose a bright pink kurta and sharara set for Karwa Chauth. The short kurta has an embroidered neckline, sleeves, and hem. The quarter-length sleeves, side slits and short hem round off the design elements. She draped the dupatta on her shoulders to complete the ethnic look. Parineeti styled the ensemble with rings, earrings, a braided hairdo, sindoor, winged eyeliner, pink lips, matching eye shadow, rouge on the cheeks, and glowing skin. [ad_2] Source link

[news365times]

[ad_1] Priyanka Chopra and Parineeti Chopra were among the many celebrities who observed the Karwa Chauth fast last night. The cousins shared pictures from the celebrations on Instagram. While Priyanka captioned her post, “To all those celebrating…Happy Karwa Chauth and yes I’m filmy,” Parineeti’s caption read, “My moon and my stars…Happy Karwa Chauth, love of my life.” Priyanka Chopra and Parineeti Chopra’s simple mehndi Priyanka’s post featured special moments from her and Nick Jonas’s Karwa Chauth celebrations. In the first click, Priyanka breaks her fast by drinking water from Nick’s hands as they video call her mom. Meanwhile, the second photo shows her reading a note from Nick, and the third is a selfie of the couple as the actor shows her off her mehndi, featuring Nick’s initials and birth date (9.16.92). As for Parineeti’s post, she shared several photos capturing her and Raghav performing Karwa Chauth rituals. In the first click, Raghav fixes Parineeti’s sindoor. In one picture, the politician can be seen playfully pulling his wife’s hair. The actor also shared pictures of her performing rituals with other married women and showing her mehndi to Raghav. Like her elder cousin, Parineeti also chose a simple design which included two hearts connected with a curved line. Decoding Priyanka’s minimal look Priyanka chose a laidback ensemble for her Karwa Chauth celebrations. She wore a vibrant pink velvet tracksuit. She styled the ensemble with colourful bangles, dainty gold bracelets, jhumkis, rings, and mangalsutra. She tied her hair in a side-parted messy updo, and for the glam, she kept her face bare. Pink lips, feathered brows, and sindoor rounded off the look. What did Parineeti wear for Karwa Chauth? Parineeti chose a bright pink kurta and sharara set for Karwa Chauth. The short kurta has an embroidered neckline, sleeves, and hem. The quarter-length sleeves, side slits and short hem round off the design elements. She draped the dupatta on her shoulders to complete the ethnic look. Parineeti styled the ensemble with rings, earrings, a braided hairdo, sindoor, winged eyeliner, pink lips, matching eye shadow, rouge on the cheeks, and glowing skin. [ad_2] Source link

[jalebi-weds-bluetooth]

Hi JWB! I hope you're well! Short hooman here:) I will keep in mind about your views on hypothetical questions*thumbs up* I wanted to know your thoughts about why Khushi still wore sindoor and mangalsutra, first- during the final days of contract marriage, especially when she said that she didnt consider arnav as her husband. And second, during the re-marriage track- she always wore sindoor and mangalsutra (Ep ref- 340) even before the actual wedding day. Thanks in advance!

Dear Short Hooman,

Sorry for the late response! Hope you’re doing well 🫂 thank you for being sweet and kind!

I believe Khushi kept wearing her sindoor and mangalsutra because (in no particular order):

1) A part of Khushi believed a certain part of their wedding to be real.

2) She was throwing back Arnav’s words. She was angry, she wanted to keep reminding him what he told her the marriage was to him during their wedding. And by bringing up the contract she wanted to make it very clear that she doesn’t consider him her husband (sindoor and mangalsutra have little meaning for Arnav and above all, one of the main things in the contract marriage was for them to pretend that everything is right so wearing sindoor and mangalsutra is a part of that).

3) Sindoor and mangalsutra is a sign of husband’s life. In the society she’s in (pre and post wedding) one usually only removes that if a husband is dead so I don’t think Khushi would’ve removed it until their divorce actually happened because of the belief that harm could befall Arnav (kind of like an apshagun? This is totally not true but we know Khushi’s religious inclination, belief system and the traditional societies she’s in).

4) Denying him as her husband also meant denying her love. For her marriage and love are synonymous so when she says “you’re not my husband”, she also means “I don’t love you” (and more importantly “you don’t love me”).

So when Arnav declares his love for Khushi, it solidifies her marriage more than any ritual so she keeps wearing her sindoor (for some events the mangalsutra is given a miss). That was the only thing preventing her from completely accepting her marriage as marriage.

So Khushi wouldn’t stop wearing those things because they’re remarrying - for her the first marriage is real and so is the second one too.

(But I will add that for the longest time she wore those symbols out of obligation - I don’t think she wore it out of love or believing he’s truly her husband with all the shit he pulled).

With much love,

- JWB

[laadgovernorandsankadevi]

IPK Rewatch: EP 01; the fateful night

ah the first look! the first impressions and the first introductions. it's interesting how the first snapshot after introducing us to Lucknow is of the Guptas. While both the families belong from the same city, it's now after 14 years that Arnav is at the point to take what is rightfully his, that Khushi breaks past the gates of his shell.

I love that bua ji's, the fiercely protective guardian of the two girls later onwards entrusted with their responsibility when they are sent to Delhi with her is the one introducing us to whose day it'll be.

"arre khushi ka mawqa hai!"

one of my favourite things about ipkknd were the possibly double meaning of dialogues. of course, it's a blissful and happy day for the daughter of the house is about to get married but today also marks the day where Arnav think he's won from his past. He is unaware that Khushi or happiness will come knocking at his door in span of few hours. Khushi is unaware that the turmoil her recklessness will pull through will lead to her, and her sister's best decisions of life.

Khushi's introductory dialogues reveal that despite being nervous she doesn't shy away from doing whatever she thinks is 'right'. I've always maintained that Khushi's moral compass is driven from the understanding of morality but whether whatever decision she makes will make the person she's doing that particular action for or from happy or sad. Right now, the shop being mortgage is going to take all of Guptas' assets and savings away. It'll also endanger her sister's happiness if the demand for dowry doesn't stop. While Khushi is right, as we know Shashi assures her afterwards, her going behind everyone to fix the situation herself isn't. These actions establish a running theme with Khushi's character. She is the definition of chaos and regardless of her intentions, things do tend to explode a lot in her face.

Also Payal's character's demure and ever-pleasing nature is established from the get go. While Bua ji is singing for her outside, she is worried about Khushi and her father instead of enjoying. The stoic tendency to please others and care for others before observing her own happiness stands out however her ability to go along until someone else takes the first step also shows her status as the elder daughter, whose often lauded as the perfect daughter of the house taking play.

The first look of Khushi, we see her eyes.

The eyes have a big role to play with both Arnav and Khushi, and to see the clarity and courage in Khushi's eyes from the first instance is just a beautiful directorial decision.

I also love Khushi's face reveal just as she is justifying her actions and revealing the same to Devi Ma. This is Devi Mayyian's child. Her absolute favourite and the closet confidant before Payal for Khushi! Sanaya looked absolutely ethereal in the first episode. The lengha is beautiful, the subdued green with pink with gota all over suits Khushi. Her switching out her khussas for tennis shoes few seconds earlier showing the unconventionality she doesn't shy away from. My only qualm is the amount of bronzer they put on Sanaya's face. (cough cough *colorism*)

Again with Khushi's moral compass, she wouldn't have stolen the milk man bike along with milk crates on the side if she actually took decisions which she thought through. Milk symbolises fertility and abundance blessed from gods. Khushi running away with stolen milk is a good use of metaphors in direction with Khushi being the force of change for everyone around her. Today in particular with Payal and Arnav's life. Also, 20,000 rs is symbolise the how the universe is shifting for the Guptas at least in the beginning. 20 being the universal number of harmony, balance and blessings and adding 0s to it which symbolise a divine journey. Three zeros simplify the divine journey Khushi has set out on and taken others along with her. The journey starting with loss will one day end with the gains Guptas didn't ever dream about. These little details were what pulled me into the script the first time around and seeing it repeat reinforces for me at least that I am glad to have been on this journey of Khushi and Arnav's from day one. (I started watching around the teej episodes).

Shashi's red kurta, I think at one point Shyam and NK both wore this during A & K's marriage. The recycling of wardrobes.

Shashi and Garima's conversation reveal the compliance that comes with being a woman in society and is understood by perhaps Garima and Bua ji. Shashi on the other hand might give into the norms, is also someone who stands against the injustices practiced in name of tradition and I love him for it! I really wish we had seen him recover before the show ended. A conversation between him and Arnav would've been heartwarming to witness since they both seem to align on their moral perspective of the world to an extent.

I know they try to tell us Khushi is around early adult years like 18, I really thought she passed as someone who was 21 and 22 through mannerism and with the bday tracks, I'm using that age as cannon.

We finally have the entry of our rakhshas urf rajkummar

I love the shot of Khushi's motorcycle leaving the gates and stopping at the signal for the chopper to fly over and her being the only one to look up in the shot. 

Ah ASR, Arnav Singh Raizada. He oozes arrogance, attitude, entitlement, purpose, and luxury. This is not an ordinary man and makes sure everyone around him remembers that. Of courses betiya didn't care about any. of it and that wasn't okay, at all!

With the first pap question we already know the this man has an established reputation of being hard to reach, of being mysterious, and making calculated decisions which leave others stumped in light of his age and experience. The second and third follow up are questions are just as enthralling. This is one of the most eligible bachelors and not many know much about his personal life. His mysteriously magnetic persona also begs answers to know why they're exceptions in him making a presence at events he is hosting in smaller cities of the country. All these questions and he answers nothing. Just calmly walks past. But we get hints. There's a past. A haunting one with a broken marriage, death, and a mother.

"Hum usoolon ke bare pakke hain!"

"Usooloon se somjhota nahi karte!"

ah chacha ji! where else do we go on to hear these lines from? Dadi ji. How ironic that a woman and her son taking pride in their ability to stick to rules, morals, traditions, are the ones at mercy of this man whose morals are deemed questionable throughout, who doesn't advertise morality, nor preach verse of tradition. These are also the people who wronged him and his sister as a kid. The Maliks left Arnav and Anjali at a place where they couldn't use their name without feeling disgraced. And now here, fourteen years later Arnav stands on the same grounds he was was told to leave from. I love the 630 above Arnav. The number signifying success. Apt! The white dove signifying the turmoil ending to some degree with the Arnav Malik rightfully taking what was his, a reign of peace.

In contrast Payal and Khushi once again having the conversation about what they're doing is right or not brings us to a contrast in decision making abilities. Arnav's move was calculated. He went over Chachaji's head to buy from the man the havali was mortgaged to. Khushi's move is driven through impulse of protecting her sister's happiness.

Khushi's words abut dil, zameer, paisa are hilarious because the man she loathes for the same reason is the one she is unable to hate. Oh how the tables turn!

I love Anjali's introduction. The first words are Arnav. The first interaction in the flashback of her's is with Arnav. The siblings are each others' first friends, first confidants, first people. Anjali wearing very thick visible sindoor after we just saw an ambiguous flash back of hers at her wedding is such a perfect example of Raizada's not being much different than the Maliks in their quest to bury the past and refuse to answer questions. Anjali wearing yellow in a see of red is such a perfect repression of what she means to Arnav. Yellow symbolises happiness, sunshine, brightness. Khushi later showing up in Green is also such a beautiful thing as green symbolises rebirth, revitalisation, and reincarnation of life. The two women are everything for this man.

We find out Arnav wanting to knock down Sheesh Mahal. Whether he does so or not, we don't find out.

(The ipk Redux was amazing at plot analyses and predicting tracks through easter eggs in the show. The complete truth of Garima, Arnav's dad, Khushi's parents, Chachaji, Dadi ji, and Shyam being tied to their past was changed according to those theories and ofc they are theories not canon. but these narrative shifts annoyed me a lot which is why I think IPK would've been good as a finite series. It wouldn't have to adjust its tracks in accordance to trps. Regardless of this theories being right or wrong, we can already observe with the omission of Chacha ji that there were changes made. Ah well.)

I loved that poet dude. The insinuation of taking to rights and two lefts, and Khushi being lost in the labyrinth that was Sheesh mahal is apt in terms of how Khushi found her life tangled with Arnav's past later onwards. I love how Khushi always ended up unintentionally walking towards Arnav since this day onwards. We see that when she ends up at Shantivan with saris. We see that when she ends up in front of him after Shyam the first time around.

and now for that fateful moment. The moment planned by the Gods. the moment where Khushi finds herself scared, her phone battery gone, she has no one and in a sea of people her eyes land at that one person. Interesting how she pulls up her dupatta just as that man stares her. Arnav's eyes when looking at Khushi find a way to admire her or in this case, he was straight up being disrespectful towards this strange girl. When she turns around to leave, she slips on the dupatta his staff had pinned on her and god, this man was taken aback by her. The first meeting derived anger from Arnav but also it pushed something he didn't hope to have to that extent. There is a pull between the two. He looks at her eyes, observes her trembling lips, and her hand, her hand clutches onto his collar which becomes a theme. The dupatta and Arnav's collar are two things that become so important in their ability to communicate their comfort to each other.

And so it begins. The love story. The kahani of nafrat, of refusing to be indifferent but trying so so hard to be.

[phati-sari]

Arshi FF: Charade - Interlude 3

Chapter 26 // Read on FFnet // Read on Wattpad

Interlude: Avalanche

Arnav

"Thank you, Sir. We're ... we're in your debt."

Mohan's brother — Ravi — shook Arnav's hand for the sixth time since they'd arrived.

"Arnav," he corrected, "and Mohan is a part of our household. I'll take care of everything."

Ravi nodded and turned towards the room Mohan was resting in. Di, Khushi and Payal had exhausted the man with their basket of home-made foodstuffs and collection of sundry items for "comfort". The women now sat next to the sickbed, conversing in hushed whispers as Mohan slept. Perhaps Khushi noticed his stare because she chose that moment to look up. She smiled serenely, blushing a little, before replying to whatever her sister asked her.

Arnav studied his driver from the doorway. Mohan was pale. His left leg was in a cast, as was his left wrist. There was a bandage around his head, and another hidden under his shirt. He had suffered a mild concussion, three fractures, a few broken ribs and a collapsed lung.

"These eight days would've been so much harder if you hadn't called the hospital," Ravi admitted.

Has it only been eight days?

Arnav thought back to their long conversation with Mohan's doctors, "He's recovering well. The doctors are optimistic."

"They mentioned post-traumatic stress," the other man said uncertainly.

"I said I would support your family through everything. I meant it. He saved my sister's life."

"How is Anjali-ji?"

"Recovering."

"The police don't think it was an accident."

Arnav exhaled slowly, "They're still investigating."

In fact, the police investigation was proceeding so slowly that what little faith he had in the public justice system was waning away to nothing. And to add to the stress, Aman had requested an extension of leave to attend the hastily-organised engagement of a younger sister.

Unbelievable.

Not only that Aman had asked, but that he'd agreed.

Arnav was distracted from his thoughts as Khushi withdrew from the women and approached. She wore the sari he'd helped her select, pink with green velvet accents.

That was also eight days ago.

She came to a standstill a short distance away, fiddling with her bangles. Just like her sindoor and mangalsutra, she never failed to wear Mamma's bangles.

"My wife, Khushi," Arnav introduced her, "and Khushi, this is Mohan's brother, Ravi."

"Namaste," Khushi brought her hands together, "How are you?"

"Fine, thank you for visiting my brother and cheering him up."

"He's like family, Ravi-ji, no need to thank us. It made Di feel a lot better to visit him and see how he's doing. Arnav-ji, I think we're finished. Mohan-ji is sleeping."

Arnav, distracted from his study of the way the sari accentuated the flare of her hips, cleared his throat before he attempted speech, "I'm ready to leave when you are."

"Okay."

She left after flashing him a final smile. He watched the sway of her hips as she walked away.

He'd been momentarily robbed of speech when she'd stepped out of their bathroom wearing that sari this morning. She'd paired it with a gold blouse with puffed sleeves and pompoms, and wore a simple gold necklace that Di had gifted her. Her hair fell in a sleek ebony waterfall down her back, begging his hands to tangle in it as they had yesterday.

His attraction to her was taking over, his mind almost continually played out one impossible (and sensual) fantasy after another. The latest had involved her against the wall, twisting her hands in his hair as he'd kissed and sucked and bitten his way down her body. Her short, gasping breaths had done wonderful things for the bounty hidden under her blouse. She'd moaned when he'd traced her collarbone with his tongue. His hand had wandered down, pushing aside her sari and circling her navel before delighting in the way her muscles had tensed and jumped as he ventured lower to chart new territory. She'd bucked desperately, needing more, and he'd been more than happy to give it to her.

His recollection of the delicious fantasy was broken abruptly as the women exited the room. When Khushi looked at him quizzically, having apparently picked up on his distraction, he shook his head before extending a hand to Ravi.

"I'll stay in touch and keep you informed if there's any new information."

The other man shook his hand vigorously, "Thank you, Sir, uh ... A-Arnav. I'll do the same."

Outside, he helped Di into the car, watching out of the corner of his eye as Khushi hauled herself into the front. For once, she buckled the belt without a reminder. The drive to Shantivan passed without incident, though he noted that Khushi glanced in his direction often. She remained seated after Payal had helped Di out of the car, so he waited with her.

"Is there something you need?" he asked when the other women had disappeared inside.

She looked out the window, nervously twisting her sari in her hands, and spoke softly, "Can you ... can you stay?"

He was confused, "Why?"

"N-n-nothing, forget it."

Khushi reached for the door handle. He stopped her with a hand to her shoulder and offered a compromise.

"I'll come home early, after the meeting."

Love makes us do strange things.

"Okay," Khushi offered him a strained smile as she alighted from the car, "Take care."

                                                    #####

He was late.

Despite his best efforts, he was late, and the mid-afternoon Delhi traffic was doing its best to exacerbate his distress. He battered the horn in frustration.

A small part of him argued that it was unreasonable of Khushi to expect that he abandon his obligations towards the company he'd build up from the ground at a moment's notice, but the rest of him hated that he'd broken a promise.

When he was finally in Shantivan, Arnav waved away a passing servant and jogged up the stairs, intending to change before searching for his wife. But what he saw from the doorway froze him in his tracks. The room was dark. Khushi sat on the bed, knees curled against her chest, oblivious to his presence.

"Why me?" she snatched at something next to her and hugged it to her chest with a sob, "Why did Shyam-ji choose me to run his scheme on?"

Any response he could've made was forestalled when he recognised what she held -- his blue shirt. Bands tightened across his chest as guilt roiled in his gut. She looked small and frail and utterly vulnerable. She spoke again before he managed to gather his thoughts.

"And why ... why doesn't Arnav-ji believe me?" Khushi sobbed into the shirt.

She didn't cry delicately. She cried as if her heart was breaking, as if her very soul was wounded, and some part of him realised that it likely was. Arnav's heart filled with sorrow and dread and half a dozen other things he had no names for.

He stepped into the room as Khushi howled into the shirt again, her shoulders shaking violently. "What else ... what else can I do? I t-tried everything. And ..."

Unsurprisingly, she didn't notice him until he was standing beside the bed. Her tear-stained features caused his breath to stall. She was strong, but not strong enough for this, not alone. The realisation brought tears to his eyes as he climbed into the bed to gather her in his arms.

Khushi struggled, pushing on his shoulders and kicking a little, but he ignored the voice of warning in his mind and held tighter. She needed this as much as he did.

"Sssshhhh."

She calmed, the hands that had been pushing him away pulling him closer. Her tears returned, thick and fast as she sobbed into his shoulder.

"Why don't you trust me?" she asked, her voice watery and broken.

And when she said that, he heard the question she did not give voice to.

Why don't you love me?

The full extent of the damage his brother-in-law had caused was suddenly made clear. It was not only the deception of the family and the betrayal of his wedding vows, it was not only the treacherous engagement and subsequent threats, it was not only his abominable lust and avarice.

It was this; the marring of every good memory and the annihilation of every hope.

"What did you think, Arnav? That she wanted you? The dancing, the earring, that kiss by the poolside? Did you think it was real?"

Arnav's tears disappeared into his wife's hair as he took a deep breath. Shyam had extinguished a flame in its infancy, but perhaps he and Khushi still held the tools to rekindle it.

"He ... he told me it was all a lie."

Her sobs quieted, and Arnav took it as a sign to continue.

"He told me you never wanted me. That all of it — the kiss, the dance, the earring — it was all a lie. A deception."

She twisted so they could see each other.

"A distraction," he finished in a whisper, "so I wouldn't notice ..."

"Never!" Khushi's denial was vehement.

"I can't tell anymore," he confessed, "It never goes away, his voice."

There was a brief silence, in which her bottom lip trembled as she placed her hand, palm flat, over his heart. After a few moments, he covered her hand with his to hold it here. She blinked back fresh tears with a sniffle.

"Khushi," he said softly, "Is it necessary to cry over every little thing?"

She gave a watery giggle, clearly remembering the other time he'd asked that — on the day he'd first kissed her by the poolside. She smiled as she shifted her weight to lean against the headboard.

He shifted too and, feeling something sharp underneath him, rescued a small gold star from under his knee. Now that he thought to look, he saw gold and silver stars scattered all over the bed.

"What's this?"

Khushi looked around, "My stars. I wanted to put them above the bed but you ... you don't have anything like that here."

A memory rose to the surface of his mind.

"I was eight years old when my parents died in an accident. I believe my parents have become stars, so I sleep with stars hung over my bed."

"Ahh."

She was speaking to her parents.

He watched the nervous motion of her hands as she spoke, "I ... I mean ... Is it ok-okay?"

"Yeah, it's fine. I can help you if you want."

He called down for HP after urging Khushi to clean herself up in the bathroom and asked the head-servant to bring up a drill and some hooks. When she was done, he took a quick shower before joining her at the foot of the bed. She'd collected all the stars into a pile.

"I'll drill the holes," he offered, "while you tie the stars to the hooks. Then I'll put the hooks into the ceiling."

They worked in companionable silence for a while, but she eventually spoke when he paused in his drilling, "Arnav-ji ... Di thinks I should get a sari for the reception."

"Hmm?"

"It's black and has a pink border. I took a photo of it for you to see."

Arnav lowered the drill, "Why didn't you just buy it?"

"Uhh," she blushed, avoiding his eyes, "It's your money, I thought I would show you first."

"Just buy it next time."

They both froze, watching each other warily as the words seemed to echo between them.

Next time.

He wondered if she knew how much he wanted to step down from the bed, if she knew how much he wanted to kiss her, if she knew how much he wanted to promise there would be a next time, and many more after that.

Forever.

He turned back to his task, now hyper-aware of her stare as he worked. Glancing down, he saw that she focussed not on his hands, but on his midriff, where his shirt had ridden up.

He cleared his throat and watched as she jumped a little before meeting his eyes. He grinned. She blushed.

And for the first time in a long time, he felt that they were going to be okay.

Chapter 27

[sominbiased]

hi, did jennie wear a bindi in the dddd mv? i heard it was just decorative crystals, but i'm not desi so i wanted to make sure

Hi love! Thank you for this question, since I have a feeling it’s a confusion a lot of non desi people have regarding Jennie’s styling. I’m assuming by making a distinction between “decorative/ fashion crystal” and “bindi” there’s some confusion as to a) what a bindi looks like and b) how the bindi is used by desi people (e.g, its only used for religious ceremonies or marriages versus being used as a fashion accessory). I’m not an expert on this subject by any means, but with the academic reading I’ve done and my own experiences growing up in India, I’d like to explain, best I can, how imo this distinction really isn’t as valid or important as the manner in which its worn.  Also that being said, I want to state upfront that this is nowhere the most offensive/racist thing done to desi people, and that people who want to cancel her over it are just trying to seem woke themselves. 

 First things first, there’s no particular style or shape that seperates a “real” bindi from just a fashion sticker. Forehead markings of all styles and shapes exist across a variety of Asian cultures. They do, however, descend from India, so I’m sure some right wing orthodox assholes will immediately jump on this by arguing because it’s from one particular Hindu tradition therefore a single red dot makes a “real bindi” (Here’s an example of the original bindi which wikipedia explains pretty well) and that therefore what we see on Jennie isn’t a true bindi, but this ignores the actual reality in India.

One, actual scholars are very clear that the historical origins of a tradition actually have very little bearing on what the cultural significance of a tradition will eventually become*, and secondly because unlike the tilaka, kumkum bindi (which are the markings used exclusively by Hindu women during marraige) and the sindoor, the bindi was never intended to be used exclusively for a particular formal occasion, nor denote a particular social class. Instead, it’s everyday wear for Hindu women, and like some some Indian accessories its also partially migrated to other communities (e.g, wearing the maang tikka is now a must for Muslim weddings as well), though that is notably less common. And because ethnic fashion is a huge industry making everyday wear for millions of Indian women, bindis are everywhere in India: on magazine covers, bollywood stars, in movies, as part of traditional dances, etc, and they are sold in a HUGE variety of styles, often very cheaply, in packs of twenty, so that you can match them to your clothes and accessories (which by the way, used to be the It Thing during primary school for me. My classmates and I all used to go to the store together and compete to get the best looking bindis askfhks). Below is Jennie’s promotional image, and a very popular style of crystal bindis; as you can see, they’re similiar and could have been bought from the same company. The only reason they’re referred to as fashion stickers now is because retailers don’t want to get into trouble after prominent Hindu groups raised objections

The issue desi people have with the popularity of the bindi overseas is not that it is worn but how it’s worn in the west versus in India and what the implications of that are. India is literally one of the most diverse countries in the world, with probably countless number of traditions and styles, so what’s remarkable that all these years the bindi, like (mehendi/henna) has remained a symbol of traditional womanhood, by which I mean its still attached to piety, respect for tradition, conventional/traditional marraige and so on. Spirituality and religion are very very important for many Hindu women, and to many of us, our fashion doesn’t mean compromising our faith (and often, values like social conservatism); another example would be the conservative but fashionable forward outfit styles many Indian Muslim women wear.

On the other hand, the bindi first became popular in the West thanks to “an exotic look” by Madonna, who among other things, is famous for being provocative and pushing the boundaries of sexuality. Now, its associated with wild, often skimpy fashions like Kendall Jenner’s “teeny tiny bra and shorts during Coachella” or “edgier, exotic” images such as G(IDLE) and Blackpink (more on that later). The issue with how these women have chosen to wear and accessorize these bindis is not that there’s anything wrong with presenting yourself in a more sexual way, but because while they might claim to be “celebrating Indian culture” if pressed, its clear from their actions that they genuinely have no idea what bindis actually represent. Foreign celebrities will ONLY make bindis integral to their  edgy/exotic looks, like Jennie wearing a bindi for a “girl crush/edgy” hip hop inspired song, and then immediately discarding it for a “classy/lady like” look while modelling for chanel. This is the opposite of how bindis are actually worn lmao (similiarly, in my post on G(IDLE), I touched on how their usage of mehendi made zero sense and was probably inspired my misconceptions about traditional desi styles). 

A similiar anology to this kind of attitude would be if I only wore round framed glasses with skimpy partying wear and then called it “an exotic look celebrating Korean culture and Korean women” while its obvious from a simple google search that glasses are not exotic accessories, are exclusively worn with casual outfits in Korea and I have no idea what the fuck I’m talking about**.  

It’s difficult to fit a variety of racist beliefs/actions into a single paragraph, but the way I choose to explain it, on a global scale the majority of the world knows nothing about what India’s actually like and tends to buy into one of two stereotypes about the country: desi people, especially women, are either dirty (e.g, we eat with our hands and have more body hair, which apparently makes us gross), backward, hypersexual (e.g, the popularity of the kama sutra and “tantric sex” which is by the way, not a real thing) and even violent, which alot of East Asian countries like Korea tend to buy into because of their colourist beliefs regarding darker skin, or b) we’re simple minded, incredibly backward people overly obessed with our traditions who might speak English but will never assimilate because of our background (e/g racist caricatures such as that one Indian guy on the Big Bang Theory). One of the weirdest aspects of the second attitude is that its now acceptable to just assume Indian traditions live in a vacuum, and we don’t have complex practices and beliefs built on a coherent set of values like everyone else in the world; the attitude that alot of foreigners have when they adopt the bindi or selectively talk about hinduism, if applied to Korea would be things like “Koreans lay out food for their deceased relatives every Chausok because they’re too simple minded and cultural to realise that dead people don’t need food” while happily ignoring the massive economy and high levels of education among the Korean population.

I think its pretty fair to say Jennie’s styling does sort of buy a little bit into both sterotypes, and it’s also fair to say that she’s in no way shown to be actively racist, and this at most is passive ignorance. Desi women have been reclaiming the bindi for years, and they deserve the same love and support foreign celebrities get. Right now though,  Indians have bigger problems to worry about than the popularity of “fashion stickers”, which is why I side eye people who make a huge fuss about this but do nothing to help desi people.  The purpose of this post is not to give people ammunition to “cancel her” which only serves to make yourself look good, but rather to say that when a situation like this occurs our first instinct should be to educate ourselves, because the more extreme forms of these attitudes allow for racism and harm towards people of colour; for instance, most Westerners have woobified Hinduism so much as a religion of peace and mystical spirituality and demonised Islam so much that the proto-fascist radical Hindu government now feels free to allow lynchings and attacks on the Muslim minorities knowing that the Western world won’t raise serious objections. It’s only when we go out to learn with what resources we have (which can be as simple as Wikipedia, like most the links in this post are) that we end up becoming more aware of the world around us, and the different ways we celebrate that as people.

Also on that note, if anyone has any money to spare, both Nagaland and Kerala, two states in India that often get ignored by the Central govt since it doesn’t benefit their Hindu extremism agenda, have experienced natural disasters this year. Feel free to donate here and here (additional info is attached) if you have any spare money.

[bollywoodhits]

Decoding Deepika Padukoneâs Wedding Looks

We all know that when it comes to fashion, Deepika is always on top of her game. We knew that we won’t be disappointed seeing her wedding looks as well. And even though the couple had an intimate wedding in Lake Como, Italy the two made sure to share the happy news with their fans. Soon after, the internet was flooded with the couple’s pictures. For almost all her wedding festivities, Deepika chose to wear her favourite designer Sabyasachi, he even styled the actress for some celebrations. And there is no doubt that both, Deepika and Ranveer looked nothing but royalty for their wedding. Even though her smile was the one that stood out for us, we have decoded Deepika Padukone’s wedding looks. Scroll down to know more...

Pre-Wedding Pooja

To start the wedding festivities the actress had an intimate pooja at her residence. Deepika opted for a simple orange suit by Sabyasachi Mukherjee. While she opted for subtle makeup, she kept her hair in a bun and accessorized her look with big statement earrings by the same designer.

Mehendi

Nothing can beat pink. Are we right or are we right? Deepika opted for a blush pink kurta by Sabyasachi. The outfit featured a thread work kurta, paired with a dupatta with the same detailing, and Deepika wore a red shawl to add color to her look. To accessories her look the actress went with a satlada haar and big statement earrings. While for her makeup she went with soft glam and nude lips and for her hair she went with a bun. For us what stood out the most was the trendy shade of pink and how well she carried it. This look is perfect if you want to look classy and enjoy your wedding functions.

Konkani Wedding

For her Konkani wedding Deepika went with a traditional South Indian bridal look. The actress looked elegant as ever in a dull gold and red Kanjeevaram saree which was gifted to her by her mother from House of Angadi, Bangalore, which she paired with a Sabyasachi silk dupatta. Accessorizing the outfit, the Yeh Jawaani Hai Deewani actress wore traditional jewellery with a temple jewellery touch, a mathapati, a small red bindi, matching earrings and bangles. As for her makeup, Deepika went with smokey eyes and nude lips. Her hair was in a middle part bun with flowers around it. We can only say that she made a perfect traditional South Indian bride.

Sindhi Wedding

Both Deepika and Ranveer color coordinated in red Sabyasachi outfits. And Deepika totally killed the North Indian wedding look. The actress was dressed head-to-toe in Sabyasachi, quite literally! We saw Deepika donning a heavily embroidered lehenga with a matching dupatta. What caught everyone's attention was her dupatta which had Hindu Mantra ‘Sada Saubhagyawati Bhava’ embroidered over it. As for her jewellery the actress went all out, she opted for heavy kundan jewellery with a maang tikka and nath. She can also be seen wearing a red chooda and kalire latkans. She even wore red thread work juttis by Sabyasachi in collaboration with Christian Louboutin. Even though Sabyasachi’s creations are always jaw dropping, Deepika made his creations look even better.

Bangalore Reception

After the newlyweds got back from Italy, they hosted a reception at Deepika’s hometown. The couple opted for ethnic wear for their reception. Deepika was styled by Sabyasachi and was seen wearing a stunning gold saree gifted to her by her mother from House of Angadi, she paired it with a white full sleeved blouse. To add more glamour to her look Deepika opted for an OTT emerald choker paired with matching earrings, a long pearl necklace, small red bindi and sindoor. For her makeup she went with smokey kohl eyes and red lips and for her hair she opted for a sleek bun. This look surely gave us full newlywed vibes and we are loving it.

Post Wedding Party

This party was hosted by Ranveer’s sister Ritika Singh Bhavnani. And for this event we saw the actress in an experimental but fresh look. Her look for the night was inspired by Frida Kahlo. Deepika was seen donned in an embroidered floral lehenga by designer Sabyasachi. While for her makeup the actress went with dark smokey eyes and nude lips, for her hair she went with a bun with a braid headband and red roses. Deepika accessorized her look with a gorgeous necklace, matching earrings and bangles. This look of the actress was so different from what we’ve seen on other brides and full marks to her for trying something new and fun.

Mumbai Reception 1

Onto the second reception which was held in Mumbai and was attended by close friends, family members and media. Breaking her streak of Sabyasachi outfits, Deepika chose to wear a gorgeous ivory and gold chikankari saree by ace designer duo Abu Jani and Sandeep Khosla. The saree was hand embroidered with Swarovski crystals and gold zardozi and features a long trail and a long head dupatta. She accessorized her look with long statement pearl earrings and necklace which blended with the blouse. While her makeup this time was nude than her previous looks, she went with nude lips and a lot of highlighter. She even wore sindoor and red chooda to give the newlywed look, and that definitely added color to her entire look.

Mumbai Reception 2

The duo definitely finished their wedding celebrations on a stylish note. For this night, Deepika stole the show in her dazzling red custom made gown by Zuhair Murad. The gown featured a long train and this look is still one of our favourites. To accessorize her look the actress went with her eye-catching engagement ring and mangalsutra. While for her makeup she went with smokey eyes and nude lips and she kept her hair down in soft waves. As the night was fun and long the Bollywood diva ditched her trail and swapped her red heels with white sneakers.

#bollywoodhits #bollywoodhitsin #celebrity # Read on : BollywoodHits.in

[thetrendingfashions]

Special sari of Bengal worn by Nirmala Sitaram while presenting the budget, know the specialty of sari

New delhi date. 01 February 2021, Monday

Parliament arrived to present the annual budget for the year 2021. Union Finance Minister Nirmala Sitaram wore a red palva sari showing her love for her handloom which was becoming a center of attraction for all. Nirmala Sitaram, meanwhile, wore the famous traditional red sari of Bengal. This white sari from Handloom has a red printed border and a yellow and white flower on the border. The green edge of this beautiful sari adds to the charm of the sari. Find out why red palva sari is worn in Bengal and what is its significance in sacred religious ceremonies.

Bengal is said to have a special sari of red palva which is worn for religious rituals and sacred occasions. Apart from this, this sari is also of special importance in Jharkhand. This sari is worn on occasions like Durga Puja, Puja rituals, Sindoor Khela. The sari is usually white or off-white with a wide red border giving it a distinct beauty. Often the printed border gives it a new look.

The beauty of this sari is worth seeing when Bengali women dance to the beat of drums during Durga Puja. Nirmala Sitaram also wore this sari on a special occasion like a budget so that she could complete this financial ritual with all her heart.

It may be mentioned that some time ago, Bengal MP Nusrat Jahan also worshiped Durga in a red palavani sari after the wedding, whose pictures were much discussed on social media.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Nussrat Jahan (@nusratchirps)

In the year 2017, the Union Ministry of Textiles registered this red palavani sari, which created a very happy atmosphere in Jharkhand and Bengal. The sari is made of handloom and silk so the government aims to promote handloom as well as give new life to the handloom industry in Bengal and Jharkhand.

For more information please go to https://ift.tt/3bbz2Ph

[ramayantika]

I got my ears pierced when I was in nursery. I still remember it well. My mother put sindoor on my ears because it was hurting a little at night after I came back.

"Objects of decoration?" I mean.... Can i laugh at this??? I was given pretty necklaces to wear too! For what? To look beautiful for a third grade random boy? Damn I am gonna judge all these white "feminists" for the mind they possess.

And now according to Ayurveda, ear piercing is also beneficial for the body. Now no one's going to press their ears every time of the day so ear piercing helps in this task. And this was also practiced by boys and male members. Even kings wore it. Now what are you going to say? They wore it to look attractive to women????

My own mother doesn't put earrings on a regular basis. Her ears hold a thin neem stick and when she has to go out to pair up with her dresses she chooses to wear a beautiful earring meanwhile I love them so i wear it everyday.

God these 'feminists' certainly need to research over things they find on the internet especially when it is related to cultures not related to their own.

And I am still going to have my daughter's ear pierced and later if she doesn't like she can not wear them.

(creating a new post because the original one was being passed around radfems circles and the notes were absolutely toxic - link to original even though it seems to have been deleted by op)

I wasn’t initially gonna reblog this because I was like well, I don’t think traditions like these should be completely beyond reproach / critics and although I did have my ears pierced as a baby and am personally glad of it, it isn’t something that I would do to my own daughters if I had them. But then I checked the notes:

and I take that back because the people replying to this post prove exactly why it’s fucking needed. Because white women (especially white radfems, whom most of these are) really don’t know how to behave themselves when talking about woc / other cultures. “It makes girls into objects to decorate and look pretty” “A sense of control over their environment which heterosexual and het partnered women seldom get to have” “not owning her body that began with her mother piercing her skin against her will” these people are acting as if woc are literal child abusers for doing something that yes, although it may be a gendered ritual and not one I personally agree with, does very little harm to their child in the long run.

First of all, there are actual cultural / religious roots to the ear piercing of children (x) and yes, it was done to both female AND male children, although it has become more of an aesthetic thing nowadays and boys being pierced is much rarer. I don’t have any concrete sources on this but I’d be willing to bet it’s to do with the influx of western culture starting with colonialism that brought the idea that earrings / jewellery are unmanly and therefore unattractive. In fact, jewellery in general and especially gold jewellery does play a significant part in Indian culture and I know Indian boys who have gold chains that they wear around their necks and have since they were a child, although I don’t know the specific significances of these. My point is, if you actually bothered to research the culture for even two minutes, you’d see that this was about more than just “omg girls being decorated for men to look at!!!”. And even if you don’t agree with the culture of piercing children’s ears, which, as I said, I don’t particularly personally, it’s really not the massive deal that some people in the notes wanna make it. I’ve had my ears pierced since I was a baby and trust me, they have never ever held me back in life. I never even considered them much. You know what probably did affect me more? The general messages I was being fed to me by society that I had to look feminine and pretty, and have “girly” interests. Makeup culture. Beauty culture. My earrings are really very very low down on the list of things that had a big impact on my life. “Why don’t you wait until they’re at least 15” “Because it’s about establishing from a young age that they’re possessions / for male decoration / that exist to be looked at!!!!” etc. etc. No, a lot of the time it’s literally so that it’s done early on and then they don’t have to go through it later. Piercings can be traumatic at any age. My friend decided to have hers done as a young teenager and it left her so scared of them closing up and having to pierce them again that she literally wouldn’t even sleep one night without earrings on. Meanwhile, I had it done as a baby and didn’t even remember. Again, is this something I would choose to do to my daughter? No, but at the end of the day I don’t know a single person who got their ears pierced as a baby who is genuinely upset and resentful about having it done, because it’s really not that much of a big deal. “It sends a clear message that your body doesn’t belong to you” “it’s our culture to train infant girls that they exist to be looked at”! My parents, contrary to apparent popular belief about desi parents, have never encouraged me to exist for male consumption. If there is one thing my mum and dad have tried to impress on my my whole life it’s that education is the most important thing and it comes before boys or relationships or anything like that. My dad has told me on no uncertain terms that my education, my life, should always come before relationships and marriage. And yes, my mum also decided to have my ears pierced when I was a baby because that is the norm and she wanted to get it over with when I wouldn’t even remember it so I wouldn’t have to get it done later if I wanted them pierced. Even recently she’s told me she’s felt guilty about it when she hears people saying things like this and that makes me so angry because my mother is not perfect, but she deserves a fucking lot more respect than these people are treating her and women like her with.

These are the three that pissed me off the most:

White feminists really do not know how to talk about woc without projecting their own narrow ideas of cultural misogyny onto everything they do. Like they’re literally taking the actions of women from cultures they know nothing about and trying to analyse them and pile patriarchal reasoning onto them - and basically assuming that all woc who aren’t from western / “developed” countries are a monolith who all share a hive mind designed around upholding the patriarchy and can’t think for themselves, unlike the enlightened western feminists who have the critical thinking necessary to see through everything.

Radfems will use the violence and misogyny faced by women of colour in countries like India etc. to prove their points and then will turn around and show their faces with posts like this where they demonstrate that they don’t really care about them except to prove a point, and that any compassion and sympathy that they have for them ends when they don’t act in ways that aligns completely with their beliefs. You’ll talk about how misogynistic and terrible things are for women in countries like India but as soon as they don’t completely conform to how you think they should behave (mostly because of the societal pressures they face) they’re suddenly agents for the patriarchy who are seeking “a sense of control over their environment which heterosexual women seldom get to have”. “It’s not clear to me what it has to do with being white or not” what it has to do with being white is that white radfems absolutely refuse to treat women of colour with respect and acknowledge that we have different experiences to them except when it’s to shit on our culture for treating us badly without actually caring about us as human beings!

Do I think desi culture is absolutely beyond reproach or criticism in the way it treats women? No, there are certain aspects of it that absolutely disgust me (as do aspects of almost every single culture in the world). However, if you really cared about the misogyny and violence faced by women in these countries, you’d use your voices to uplift them and listen to their problems and support the causes they think are important and will improve their lives instead of just using them as a stage to soapbox about your own opinions. But of course, you couldn’t do that! Because they might think the wrong things are important! Because they don’t see the world through your special enlightened western feminist eyes who can see that earrings are the real root of the problem!!!!!

Again, I don’t personally agree with this tradition and I don’t think it should above criticism, but it certainly isn’t awful or horrible enough to justify the sheer amount of vitriol directed at women of colour who do it - as op was trying to say from the beginning, it’s really not that deep. And in addition, what this post has done is reminded me why even if I do think a cultural practice is allowed to be criticised, I absolutely don’t trust white feminists to be the ones doing it. This isn’t about “my culture is perfect and beyond any reproach or criticism”, this is about white women not knowing how to behave when talking about women of colour of other cultures and being unable to talk about them without acting as if they know everything and projecting their own preconceived ideas about why the people of that culture behave the way they do in order to get their own points across about the society they themselves live in while simultaneously throwing the women of that culture under the bus by treating them as if they are completely helpless naive victims or agents for the patriarchy who are complicit in their own oppression, and either way are not enlightened enough to see through their culture in the way that only western feminists can.

[charvimehta]

AUGUST: THIRD WEEK

Hello everyone! 

This week we finally began with our shoot for the story we have been planning for for almost an year now!

Day 1 

On our first day of shoot I first went to purchase the gelatin paper for covering the tube lights with it for a few shots where we wanted to add a dominating hue to the shot, while the director went to collect other equipment from the school. Till the time @hasvini-jain arrived a taking a few hand-held shots and plan where I would place the tripod. Our first location was my maternal unlce’s home which is deep in the old city from where the fort is clearly visible.

However, we were running a late for taking the time-lapse shot of the fort, even though we had a few still shots we decided to schedule it a day later when we would take other overview shots of the city.

From here we went to the second location which was my father’s maternal uncle’s 100 years old “haveli” (mansion) which we chose as a location for our lead character Gunjan’s maternal home.

The first shot that I had planned was of Gunjan doing skipping, which I shot in three different frames, in this she wore the costume which we had purchased last year for her keeping in mind the opening sequence.

For the next shot she changed into blue kurta which was of the kitchen where she’s studying and her mother scolds her. I kept this shot simple and placed the characters in a way where Gunjan is show that she is trying to ace in her life but Shanti Devi is trying to pull her back by asking her to stop studying.

Next was a shot of Gunjan playing with flowers where she wore a red outfit this was to show her passionate and cheerful side of personality, as we had limited flowers so after every retake the director and the editor had to collect the task which took a lot of time for this basic shot. Which I shot in two different ways, one was where the camera is static and placed at a height and the second one is handheld where the camera is going closer to her.

Then she again changed into a subtle pink kurta where we she is having a conversation with her mother and refusing to do household chores, this was an important scene. I shot this in three different ways.

Then while Shanti Devi AKA ma’am Prakash was changing my teacher suggested me to use a mirror that was hanging on a wall in front of the Haveli’s gate, so I planned it as a still hand help shot where she is walking out with books in her hands, we took many retakes for it as we had to wait for the sunlight to decrease and the clouds to cover up as every time there was sunlight that shot turned out to be overexposed! 

After that when Chitrangana was changing into her bridal attire we took another on-the-spot experimental shot of Shanti Devi shouting to call Gunjan.

Then we took a short break because we were all extremely hungry and tired because there was a lot of physical work as the location was huge!

After the break Hasvini did makeup of Chitranagana for her shot with her mother where she’s getting ready for her marriage.

While we were taking this shot lights suddenly went off and the availability of natural light was not enough moreover waiting for the electricity was no solution as we had already wasted 15 mins for it and we had to go back at the previous location for the rest of the shots. So we all turned on the flash lights of our mobile phones of everyone present at the location and everyone not in the frame held 2 phones each. We had around 8 flashlights switched on. And shot was looking beautiful so we took it. I too while holding the camera was holding a flash light! 

After that we did a quick photoshoot of Manan and Chitrangana just in case if decided to use those images for our poster.

After we were done with it we packed up everything and moved to the other location. After we reached there I shot the last scene of her in bridal attire which was of a ritual which is the newly wed bride walking on a white cloth with red feet which is considered a good luck. I had only takes for it so first I took a trial shot then two final retakes however, we improvised and wanted to take a shot of her from the back also. So we asked her walk exactly the same way matching the footprint, which turned out to be effective. For this shot we used 500 grams of KumKum to make appropriately thick paste for proper footprints.

For the next scene she had to change into another costume but it was very tight for her so Hasvini and Pooja had to open the stitches of her blouse with a safety pin, we didn’t even have any alternatives as their was a limitation of costume. During this I was setting the camera. We shot this scene near a window, while placing the characters we made Gunjan sit on the floor and Rudra on the edge of the window while they are talking. Here he asks her about the things se likes to which she says that she likes studying, playing and dancing while looking out of the window which is a sign that she likes window. Whereas Manan is on the window to show that he’s stopping her from becoming a part of the outside world and controlling her freedom. I took the shot from various angle one of it was a low angle OS shot of Manan to show him as a dominating character and a high angle reverse OS of Chitrangana to show her as being dominated.

Next was a shot of Gunjan where she’s sitting on the staircase on terrace and playing with flowers and when Rudra suddenly enters she stops playing and stands up scared. This was an impromptu shot to show the fear of one’s own husband women in India have which is mostly considered to be quite normal.

Then we took a shot of Rudra studying and Chitrangana gets tea for him, she keeps trying to get a hang of what he’s studying because she misses studying and is keen to learn about new things. 

The last scene for the day was of Chitrangana getting water for Manan but he gets disgusted by its wierd taste and throws it at her. We had only two takes for it  as she would get wet every time and this was the last pair of costume we had. 

In every scene we gave her a different costume most of which were her own clothes. Each color was for one of her personality traits. The director chose the costumes for every scene very carefully, while keeping in mind what exactly did we want to show through it.

Day 2

After completing all the indoor shots with Gunjan the other day on our second day we had the scenes with the second actress, Kajal, who played the role of adult Gunjan. 

We started our shoot by making the red light using red gelatin paper and Tube light. Then took a shot of Kajal standing in front of a mirror and applying Sindoor, which is a sign of marriage and also for the long life of their husband. During this shot adjusting the light was a very tricky part because we had to directly put the wire in the socket and there was no plug so the wire kept loosening up. It was just three of us with the actress over there. I was handling the camera, Pooja was handling the reflector and a phone for clicking pictures for the blogs and Hasvini was handling the tube light.

After that we took a shot for which she changed her costume and is opening her payal (anklet) which was just like the shot of Chitrangana in which she wore the payal. This was to compare the anklet with shackles.

After this she again changed into another costume, for this shot I chose the smallest room at my uncle’s place to add a suffocating and restrictive vibe to the shot and we also wanted to keep the impact of the red light a light harsh for their one of the close-ups of this scene. The other shot was of Manan pulling Gunjan and throwing her on the bed.

And for the same scene Hasvini did a little makeup on her face to show that Manan had slapped her.

After this till the time Kajal was changing her costume for the next shot Hasvini and I took a shot of Manan while praying, this scene was really fun as we had to take many retakes because Manan wasn’t able to light a matchstick properly because of this we got a lot of bloopers too! This was the last scene with after which he left.

Then Hasvini did a full bruised makeup on Kajal’s face for a shot where she is sitting on the bed and her sister-in-law is talking to her.  For sister in law we first selected an other actress but she refused last moment so we had to as one of our team members (Pooja) to just sit their as the sister in law.

After this Kajal again changed into another costume for a shot where she is holding a knife in her hand and her reflection is seen in it to show her murderous intentions. I took this shot in two ways one was a low angle shot of her peeling potatoes and another one was an OS handheld shot.

After this we had a shot where water is splashed onto Gunjan which was similar to that of water being thrown on Gunjan (Chitrangana) the other day.

AND last but not the least! Then came our longest and the most tiring and the most important scene where Gunjan is dancing and celebrating her freedom after murdering her husband it was in the same costume which she had to change again which she wore while removing her anklet (payal). 

It was super tiring because we had to clean the floor after retake so that there no marks seen on the floor as the tiles were reflective and white! 

After we were done with all the scenes with Kaajal we took a shot where blood moves towards the drain. During that shot also we had to wipe the whole area again and again for every retake.

That was all for this day! That was all for this week, see you next week.

[pooja-r-bi]

August: Third week

This week as scheduled we were busy for our A levels Shoot.

Day 1

Before everything else Hasvini and Charvi made a round to the school to collect the equipment, which were a tripod, lights, reflectors and mic as for the camera we borrowed it from our classmate Kushagra. 

I reached the location on the decided time, but I waited outside the lane for Hasvini and Charvi to arrive since they went to the other location to set up everything and to take a still shot of the fort and the overview of the city. The reason I waited outside and didn’t proceed to reach the location was simple, I am extremely bad with directions and the house was deep inside the city which is like a maze of lanes.

After that we made an appearance at the set and remembered that we forgot to bring flowers. At the same time we got a call from Prakash ma,am informing us that they reached but don’t know the exact destination. So we decided to go by scooty. But we cant possibly bring Prakash ma,am, Chitrangana, me and Charvi on a two seater and it is not possible for a four wheelers to enter these congested lanes. And we had no choice but to walk there. Then in end me and Hasvini drove there and Charvi walked.  Once we reached the spot we bought the flowers for one of the scenes where Gunjan plays with flower.  They had a luggage with them which contained there costumes. As me and Hasvini were on scooty we held the luggage in between us along with several bags which Hasvini kept on the foot mat. After exploring the locations for number of times now Charvi remembers the lanes as the back of her hand so she guided Prakash ma,am and Chitrangana.

For our first day shoot we only called them and Manan(husband).Our plan was to complete all the shots related to Gunjan’s childhood in one day and set our actors free.We begun with shooting Gunjan’s (actors) skipping rope and laughing. For this shot we asked her to wear the costume that we had gotten for her.

 After this shot she changed and then we took the shot where her mother scolds her for studying all the time and not helping her out with the household chores. We took this shot in the kitchen with only natural light coming from one window. Prakash ma,am was wearing a light pink colored costume because she wasn’t a dark character and neither was she a happy or helping character. 

Then after this scene Chitrangana again changed her costume. She had to change a lot of costumes in one day since it was a trailer and these shots were of different days and time. After she changed we took the shot where she plays with flowers. During that shot every time she would throw flowers everywhere and after every retake we had to pick them up again and put them back in the basket as we didn’t had that much flowers.

She again had to change. In this  scene Gunjan’s mother asks her to wash the dishes and she refuses. During this scene our audio recorder ran out of battery and we did not have a backup, so we had no choice but to use our mobile phones for recording the audios. After this we experimented with a mirror shot that turned out to be a really nice shot. But during that scene we had to take lots of retakes because the actress kept slipping off the stairs. Eventually we got the perfect shot.  After this we quickly took a shot of Gunjan’s mother shouting her name.

Then we took a short lunch break which turned out to be really long. Post lunch Hasvini did Gunjan’s bridal makeup it wasn’t a heavy makeup because she was just a child and we didn’t wanted to hide her innocence behind all the makeup. But setting her costume and jewelry took a little extra time and for that she took help from our teacher.

Then we took some of the bridal shots that we had to take of Gunjan with her mother, in that location. During shooting this particular scene the lights went out but we had to take that shot anyhow because we had no time to waste so we all turned on the flash lights of our mobile phones and most of us including Manan held 2 phones each. We had around 8 flashlights switched on. Even I who have a Nokia keypad phone used the flashlight for contributing in the light. 

Once we were free from our first location we packed up everything and moved to the other location. Shifting was again a task but it was easy as we were 8 people and we had 4 scooters so 2 on each scooter.

After reaching there we first had coffee from Charvi’s maternal uncle’s house. Charvi have two maternal uncles both of them live nearby and our location was her other uncle’s house.

 We resumed our shoot with the shot where she walks on the white cloth as a ritual of her first step in her in-laws house as a married woman.  We only had two chances to shoot that shot as we had limited white cloth and we couldn't possibly stain the floor. 

After taking this shot Chitrangana again changed her costume  the dress she wore this time was a little too tight for her so we had to sit there and open the stitches of the dress because we only had limited costume so we couldn’t afford to lose one, although we removed the stitches when we were on the first location itself. Prakash ma,am told us that this dress belonged to her mother and gifted it to Chitrangana. There was one more reason to be super careful while we were unstitching the dress. 

The skirt of this dress was a little to high than it should be. So we decided to use it for the shot where Gunjan is sitting and talking with her husband. We took this shot from different angles. During this scene we got a lot of bloopers because the actor kept mispronouncing a word and we couldn’t stop laughing at that.

After this we took another shot where she is playing with flowers and gets scared when her (Manan) husband enters. During this scene also we had to pick up the flowers after every retake. She was sitting on the staircase while we were hiding behind the staircase so as to not be captured in the scene. Then we took another shot where she brings tea for her husband while he is studying and she keeps looking at the books because she missed her own books and studies.

Next shot we took was where she gets water for husband but he throws the water on her instead. During this scene also Manan couldn’t throw the water properly. We only had two chances for this shot also as she would get wet every time.

Day 2

On this day we had our shoot with another actress, Kajal Vyas who is the playing the role of adult Gunjan. At first we begun with sticking a gelatin paper with a tube light using a cello tape to create a red light effect. We used an extension cord to turn the light on as it did not had any plug Hasvini wore rubber chappals as a safety precaution this was quit irritating as we had to directly put the wire in the socket so the wire kept loosening up so she had to hold the extension cable and light at all time. All this while I was taking stills. This is the reason why I cant be seen in any of the evidence shots although some were taken by Charvi while she was organizing the camera and frame. Then took a shot of Gunjan standing in front of the mirror and putting sindoor (Indian women apply sindoor as a sign of being married).  

After this shot we took another shot where she opens up the payal (anklet) here we have compared the payal with shackles. After this shot was the scene where Manan pulls her in the room and throws her on the bed. 

We shot this scene in red light mixed with a little. During this scene we also took a shot of Manan pulling out his belt and wrapping it around his hand.  For this scene Hasvini did Kajal’s makeup to show a slap mark on her face. She also did Manan’s makeup to make him look older than before. Then shot the scene where Gunjan’s reflection is visible in the knife. 

Right after this was the scene where Kajal, while cleaning the table does a complex calculation in front of Manan. Where his ego gets hurt and his shuts his book with a thud. Then while Kajal was changing we took a individual shot of Manan while praying.  Then Hasvini again applied a  bruised face makeup on Kajal and we took a shot where she looks away while talking to her sister in law. For sister in law we first selected an other actress but she refused at the last moment so we had no option but for me to sit in her stead just to sit their as the sister in law wearing all those clothes.

After this scene came our longest and most important scene where she dances like a maniac and removes her sindur and all the ornaments that symbolize marriage. During that scene she had to leave bloody footprints so after every take  Hasvini and Charvi were cleaning the floor. 

Then we shot our last scene with Kajal. The shot was about kajal being dreanched as a bucket full of water was thrown at her. Hasvini was throwing that water on her from outside the frame but after the water was thrown on her she looked in the camera and laughed. This was supposed to be our one take shot but we had to take a retake of the shot, this time our  teacher also stood their with her phone and she recorded this scene in slow motion.

After this scene we shot the scene where a dead body is lying in the bathroom and blood is moving towards the drain. During that shot also Hasvini and Charvi were wiping the whole area again and again for every retake.

[richmeganews]

Islamic Gurus Target TMC MP Nusrat Jahan For Wearing Sindoor | ABP News

Nusrat Jahan who recently married her long-time beau businessman Nikhil Jain is facing protest by Muslim dharm gurus for wearing saree and sindoor.Jahan took oath as a member of the 17th Lok Sabha with her post-marriage name Nusrat Jahan Ruhi Jain today. She also wore a saree and sindoor while appearing in the parliament for the oath-taking. #NusratJahan #TMC #LokSabha

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[rowdyprofessor]

Saat Soch: IPKKND3 Episode 21

Here there be spoilers!!

Previous

1. Kuch kuch hota hai

Chandni: “Stop it!” Advay: “Stop what?” C: “Yeh tedi smile dena band kijiye. Aap jaise tataiya tedi smile deta hai na, toh dar lagta hai.”   [Stop smiling crookedly like that. It’s scary when a wasp like you smiles like that.]     A: “Kyun? Yeh dekh kar kuch kuch hota hai?”    [Why? Does something happen when you see it?] C: “Haan, hota hai.”    [Yes, it does.]

Fear. What you feel is fear, Chandni. Run.

I’m a huge fan of the way she threw the dupatta on his face but her defiance feels like flirtation, an interpretation completely backed up by Advay’s reaction (that smile that just refuses to go away).

I love this version of Kyun Dard Hai Itna! I fell in love with it instantly last night!! Advay takes the star stuck in her and sticks it into his pocket (right next to his heart!!) in a scene that visually reminds us of his promise to bring down the moon and stars for her.

Fixing the maang tikka was an excellent touch. A maang tikka can be used to symbolise a woman’s honour (it’s an element of solar shringaar, or the sixteen traditional bridal adornments) and Advay putting it back visually reminds viewers of a man applying sindoor to his wife. The maang tikka falls in the middle of the forehead, where the ajna chakra is believed to be and most of us are familiar with the concept of the third eye that is associated with it (where a bindi and tilak are applied). The ajna chakra is represented by two petals that can signify the sun and the moon, Shiva and Shakti, or male and female aspects. Thusly, it can represent the union of male and female on spiritual, physical and emotional levels.

Chandni cannot hide how his touch devastated her as, for the millionth time, Advay makes her into the bride we all know she will eventually be.

Khushi’s Salman-ji makes an appearance here as well :)

Side note: Do you think Sobti just sighs and rolls his eyes at the parallels now? Or maybe he doesn’t realise just how many there are because he doesn’t incessantly watch and rewatch IPK like I do.

2. Har roz naye naye nickname?

I’m glad someone pointed it out because honestly, Chandni’s anger and fear don’t feel genuine because of all the cute nicknames she uses. Now he’s Atrangi Singh Raizada as well. She sounds like she’s complaining about a lover who’s misbehaved not an obsessed stalker who once set her dupatta on fire and set fire to a rival.

I pointed out in last week’s Aaj Tak that I’d love to see Advay interact with Meghna and Shikha, and this scene just cements that. Meghna would probably lose all mental faculties -- she apparently reverts to a TV-serial bahu when confronted by hot men.

I’m so sick of this dupatta I swear. IPKKND3: starring The Red Dupatta, and it’s cousin, the Other Red Dupatta, and some guy named Sobti and some girl named Tomar.

It also annoys me that Chandni wore the chunni for so long, apparently without realising it. She’s fallen so hard for this man and she’s the only one who can’t see it. She has a moment where she recalls Indrani telling her how much PP’s rishta means to her before she (finally) throws the dupatta away but it conveniently lands on a chair, and not on the floor, so we know that what it represents (Advay and Chandni’s marriage) is still unsullied.

She called him khat khane (alligator) and tatiye (wasp) again ... her names for him aren’t exactly ... flattering. They’re dangerous, weaponised animals. 

3. Chrikut

Unsurprisingly, Shikha comes up with the idea to bring down “Bade Chirkut” using “Chhote Chirkut’s” idea, which I thought was an excellent way to remind us that they’re brothers.

Side note: Remember Arnav as the packet, and Aarav as the Chhota Packet?

They decide that pranking Advay Singh Raizada is the way to go.

Pro Tip: It’s not.

Chandni (as Rachna): “Saiyyan jhoota, heart hai toota.”    [My lover was false, my heart is broken.]

They shoot a video where Chandni Rachna tells a story of how the man she loves betrayed her, how he invited her to watch an Emraan Hashmi in a park before deciding to reenact some moves. She says he was hotter than a hot (spicy) samosa, that he had a crooked smile, big eyes, and a cute nose. And anger on his nose.

Note: 1) It means he’s quick tempered. Anjali said exactly the same thing to her Chhote in Episode 2/3.   2) Chandni complimented Advay a lot, didn’t she? Rachna couldn’t resist the physical pull of him, the raw sexuality of him. I wonder if Chandni will end up succumbing to Advay in a similar way, and will thus be caught in a compromising situation.

Chandni (as Rachna): “Maine usse dil diya, mauka diya, aur usne mujhe dhoka diya. Ek bhi vaada poora nahin kiya, mujhe chor ke chala gaya.”    [I gave him my heart, I gave him a chance, and he betrayed me. He didn’t fulfil a single promise, he left me.]

And this, of course, is exactly what will happen. Chandni seems to be narrating her own fate.

Side note: Where did Chandni get that photo of Advay?

We haven’t seen it for a while and the trauma is fading, so obviously it’s time for another Shat Pratishat Vashisth moment :|

4. In which Advay plays catch up

The entire family sees it, from Mausa-ji to Murli and Shilpa, but apparently, no one recognises the backdrop as being a room in their own house.

When Advay arrives downstairs, he’s confronted by the entire family (exactly like he was when he and Chandni were discovered meeting on the roof).

Kajal: “Aaj kal ke ladke na, sirf girls-wali-ladkiyon ko hi dekhte hain. Yeh nahi, ki kisi ladki ki kamsin maasi ke ek baar dekh le.”    [Boys these days, they only look at the young girls. They never think to look at the girl’s youthful maasi.]

This was my favourite line of the episode. I absolutely lost it last night, watching the episode at Too Late O'clock. Mausa-ji’s reaction was hilarious.

“There’s something wrong” concludes Flustered Singh Raizada.

Side note: Genius, this one.

The maasi’s are overly concerned about Advay’s dishonourable actions and how they reflect on the household, and in particular on Chandni, who is about to be married.

Indrani: “Humein tumse yeh umeed nahi thi.”     [I did not expect this from you.]

Advay’s saasuma is not impressed with him, lol, which is all the more hilarious because he still has no idea what’s going on. And the best song in the universe plays here, I laughed and laughed and laughed. ‘Ek Chatur Naar’ from Padosan (1968). Youtube link

Ek chatur naar,            [An over smart lady] Kar ke singaar,             [All dressed up.] Mere mann ke dwar,    [Into my heart,] Ghusat jat.                   [She barges in.] Hum marat jaat.           [I’m dying.]

It’s Murli who finally clues my drama llama bitwa in, showing him the Dhokebaaz Saiyyan video clip.

PP’s briefly enters to assert that while he’s pulled the same stunt fifteen times (of course you have, you filthy creep), he’s never been outed on video like this.

Advay is me and I am Advay:

PP then takes his leave, saying he’s going to meet with his Chandi because he’s the type who tries before he buys.

Phati-Sari: *vomits*

5. Advay and his saasuma

Advay was about to go all Avenging Batman on PP’s ass but Shilpa literally drags him to Indrani.

She muses that he doesn’t know about life ‘here’ because he’s London before revealing that an entire household (or family) can be tarnished because of an accusation against a daughter. 

Indrani: “Yeh ghar dard bardaasht kar sakta hai, daag nahin.”    [This house can withstand pain, but not dishonour.]

Unwilling to see her any of her three (3) daughters sullied, she acknowledges that she cannot question him about his personal matters before politely asking Advay to leave until Chandni’s marriage is complete. She even acknowledges that it’s his own home and that he’s been generous in the past, and asks him to show generosity again.

6. Advay owns too many suits

He does!

7. Chandni cannot stay away.

She arrives as Advay is packing and taunts him like the miserable idiot she is. I’m not seeing any particular strength of character or intelligence here. It’s not cool or strong or anything, in my opinion. Why does she keep seeking him out? Why does she keep flirting with him??

Chandni: “Apni koi bhi cheez chor ke mat jaiye ga.”    [Don’t leave anything of yours behind.]

In the least surprising move of the century, Advay uses the dupatta to pull her closer and their Rabba Ve plays. He keeps her there using the same dupatta until Chandni, apparently quaking with fear, begs him to release her.

Advay: “Tumne hi kata tha na, apni koi cheez chor ke mat jaana?”     [You said it, right, not to leave anything of mine behind?]

Side note: She walked right into that one.

He releases her instantly when she asks again.

And it’s like a switch flips. Gone is the trembling, stuttering girl, replaced by a sassy, flirtatious vixen who brings up Rachna. She gives the coin back, all chatur like.

Side note: UGGGGHHH, I’m apparently still angry about this, almost 24 hours later.

What the hell is going on? I did think, all the way back in Episode 1, that she’s bipolar or has dual personality or something, but I abandoned the theory pretty quickly. I just. Pfffftttttt.

Precap: Advay is apparently still in the house, knows about the childish prank she’s played, and invites her up to his room (katto gilehri ban ke). Lol so katto means hot/sexy/item/piece and gilehri means squirrel so katto gilehri isn’t exactly flattering (here watch this song).

Theories:

1) I still think Chandni will somehow be caught in a compromising situation and her engagement will break and Advay will step in (or have to step in). I feel all these midnight meetings are being set up for a reason.

2) I’m going to get sick of watching them exchange the shagun-ka-sikka very soon.

Will I continue watching?

Yup! But I will not be guaranteeing Saat Soch posts, so if you have any questions or comments please feel free to drop an ask :)

Next

[theweddingknot]

India is a vast country with different religions, traditions, faith and values and so does the Indian weddings are full of traditions, rituals which hold religious as well as emotional values to each and every function held on weddings. 

And from many traditions and customs, there is one most important ritual in Sikh/ Punjabi  bride known as “Chooda and kalire rasam” 

Both these ceremonies are held on the morning of the wedding day at the bride’s place.

What is a Chooda?

Chooda means a set of bangles,  traditionally means a set of 21 bangles in red and white/ ivory. Earlier chooda was made with haathidaant (elephant tusks) but now they are made from plastic.

Why it is worn??

Chooda is said to bring good luck for the newlyweds. Also, red is a very important colour for a married woman in India as it strengthens the bond between a couple. Fertility and prosperity are also associated with the chooda, and it is worn for a minimum period of 40 days and maximum for 1.5 years after the wedding.

Like in Hindu weddings bride is supposed to wear “Mangalsutra” & “Sindoor” for his husband sakes, and also a sign of a married woman likewise Sikh / Punjabi bride wears “CHOODA” as in Sikhism married women do not wear “Sindoor” or “mangalsutra” but in some Punjabi traditions they do wear.

When it is worn and by whom?

It is worn on the morning of a wedding day. The chooda is put on a bride’s wrist by the mama “Maternal Uncle”.

In some places, the bride is not allowed to see her chooda and sits with her eyes clothes. They say if you see your chooda before the wedding it is inauspicious. So after the chooda is put, it is covered with a cloth.

  Chooda Rasam/Ritual

On the wedding morning, after bride took her bath known as ” Khaare Laana”, the chooda ceremony will be performed. The chooda is put into “Kachhi Lassi” ( mixing milk and water together), yes not only milk but milk and water.

Yes, It is worn after the bath, final bath of a bride to be in her own home as after this she will be a married woman. So, after putting the chooda into a bowl of “kachhi Lassi”, the maternal uncle will start putting the chooda on a bride to be wrist and following, maternal uncle’s wife and then the brothers can perform this ritual.

Chooda comes in “Nanki Shakk” ( Gifts from mom’s side Family). In Sikh Wedding, Bridal wear and Chooda is given by them.

Pro Tip:  When you put Chooda into kachhi, please do not remove the thread and mix into that mixture, As chooda is ” small in size from the front and larger from the back”, and if you mix it, possibilities of wearing it wrong. So, make sure you do not cut the thread and if you do, there are numbers on the inside of chooda, put it according to the numbers.

  There is a variety of chooda, from colours to design to anything you name and it’s in the market.

Nowadays brides can select colours like pink, maroon, orange, white to match their chooda to their bridal outfit.

The number of bangles has now been replaced by sets so you can opt for a single, double or triple set. The designs traditionally had red dots on the white bangles but now flashy rhinestones and Swarovski are also used.

  Customised Chooda, yes! you heard it right you can customise the chooda like * You can get it with bride and grooms name on it. * Pictures of bride and groom etc.

In Punjabi tradition, A puja or havan is usually organised during the chooda ceremony. The bangles are first purified with milk and rose petals. Before it is put on the bride’s wrist by her maternal uncle, all the close relatives touch the chooda as a mark of their blessings. After that, the wrist is covered with a white cloth, as the bride cannot see the chooda until the time of the wedding ceremonies.

  What not to do??

You can not change or remove the “Chooda” once it wore at least for minimum 40 days.

You cannot remove it by your own, there is a small ritual called ” Chooda wadhana” (Removal of chooda).Chooda Wadhana:Bride’s sister in law (husband’s sister) can only remove the Chooda and then some gifts have been given to her by a bride, it can be anything.And if a bride wants to wear it for a longer time, Sister in law will remove only two bangles from each hand and put it back on her hand.Note:  Make sure you do not remove all bangles and only two has to be removed and put it back if a bride wants to wear it as it is. If all bangles are out you cannot wear it back.

  Why you cannot remove or change it?

A bride wore it for a husband, and this ritual is performed by bride’s maternal uncle. and it held an emotional as well a belief that it is “worn for husband”.  It is a sign of Married Women.

  Kalire

Kalire are umbrella shaped hangings which were earlier made of silver or dry coconut and makhana that are encrusted with dried beetle nuts and dry fruits.The significance is to provide good wishes to the bride and to remind her of her cousins and friends whom she is going to leave behind when she gets married. Also, the coconut-shaped of the kalire is symbolic that she never runs out of food in the new home, while the metal symbolises wealth and prosperity But now the modern kaliras are made of metal and studded with rhinestones.

  When it is worn & whom?

These are worn after the chooda ceremony when the bride is all dressed up in her bridal wear. Kaleere are gifted by Bride’s sisters, friends and close relatives

Yes, worn after when the bride is all dressed up so the kaleere don’t get tangled.

After the kalire are tied, a bride makes all her unmarried friends and she shakes her hands on their heads. It is believed that if any part or the kalire fall on the head of any girl she will get married soon.

Often there are dried beetle nuts, dry fruits and coconut encrusted on the kalire. These are available in various designs and sizes, and one can pick according to their choice.

What not to do?

You cannot remove it once it is worn until you reached your new home ( inlaw ) house.

You cannot remove it your own, Sister in law (Husband sister) will do this favour.

What to do with them?

You can save them in their box or also use it as a decor in the house.

  XOXO PC

Significance Of Chooda And Kalire India is a vast country with different religions, traditions, faith and values and so does the Indian weddings are full of traditions, rituals which hold religious as well as emotional values to each and every function held on weddings.