#also she was younger than me. not that relevant but adds to my embarrassment over being infantilized

[scarletanpan]

Had a riveting conversation w another neurodivergent person I met at work for like the first time in a while until I got hit w ‘autistic ppl are so innocent-minded! idk how yall do it but it’s so cute’ like oh. I see.

[gc-genshin]

Chapter Four: Epiphany

Epiphany (n.): a sudden insight or understanding of something.

Pairing: Various x female reader

Summary: You get an idea of what's going on… sort of.

Warnings: Explicit language.

Word count: 12.7k (holy shit my bad)

A/N: Uh… *taps mic* hello?? Is this book still relevant?? Did y'all miss me? Lmao, lot of shit happened the past months so I wasn't really able to focus on this story unfortunately. I hope this extra long chapter makes up for the wait! Plus this isn't proofread and I'll add the taglist later, I'm ready to post this chapter.

Happy reading!

Your first week of working at the Wangshu Inn was… uneventful, to say the least.

Other than being hectic trying to take care of guests because of Lantern Rite, nothing really surprising has happened. Which you suppose was a good thing.

After your little drinking incident that happened a few days ago…

—

“Perhaps…” Xiao started and you waited with a baited breath, nervous as to what he was going to say. “You are in need of some assistance, you imbecile.”

You looked at him with hazy and unfocused eyes. In your drunken stupor, you could only respond to him with an embarrassed laugh.

“Aha, yeah…” You trailed off awkwardly. Your eyes then began to droop dangerously low as a sudden wave of drowsiness had hit you. Xiao could only watch as you instantly passed out in his arms while letting out small snores. The adeptus let out an aggravated sigh as he picked up and carried you to your shared room, already regretting the decision of taking care of you.

—

It was safe to say you didn't see him for a day or two.

Today was Friday. One day before the Mingxiao Lantern was released. Goldet had decided to already pay you for your two weeks because of how hard you were working, which you tried to decline, but Goldet was as stubborn as you so you reluctantly accepted the money.

You were sweeping the reception area, bored out of your mind. You were done with all of your chores but you still wanted to work and be productive. You turn your head when you hear Goldet heave a sigh.

“Lantern Rite is nearly here, why don't we decorate the inn this year?” She asks you.

That line sounds familiar. You tilt your head, feigning confusion. “Lantern Rite? What's that?”

Goldet looks at you surprised. “Oh! Don't you know? On the first full moon of the first month each year, Liyue celebrates the Lantern Rite. It's a festival to commemorate the heroes from the past. After dark, the people release Xiao and Mingxiao Lanterns into the night sky.” She began explaining. “Ah... "May the flames of wisdom spread to all, and never be extinguished." This is the meaning of the lanterns. We believe they act as the beacons in the night, guiding bygone heroes back to their homeland.”

You gaze at her in wonder. “That sounds like a magnificent festival.” If I cried during the cutscene from the game, I wonder how much of a mess I would be if I was able to see it in person.

“Do you want to get involved in the Lantern Rite?” Goldet asks.

You nodded. “From the way you were talking about it, it sounds like a wonderful experience.”

Goldet clapped her hands excitedly. “That's great! The festive period leading up to the day itself is all part of the celebrations. If you're looking to take part, it's not too late.”

You thought for a moment. “Wait, so you're telling me that I don't have to work?” You asked Goldet.

She let out a small gasp as if she was shocked you would even suggest such a thing. “Oh Archons no! I would never ask you to work on a holiday such as Lantern Rite!” She exclaimed. You blink at her a few times, caught off guard by her slight outburst, and she laughed at your expression. “Haha... During this time, we pray to bring peace and ward off bad luck. Liyue locals call it "bidding farewell to the old and welcoming the new."

After hearing Goldet exclaim, Huai’an, her husband and the innkeeper, came to see what the commotion was. “Verr, are you alright? I heard you yell.” He asked with a concerned look.

Both you and Goldet turned to him. “I'm fine, dear. I was just explaining to [Name] the history behind Lantern Rite.” Goldet tells him. “Can you believe this will be her first time celebrating it?”

Huai’an gives you a look of surprise. “You've never experienced Lantern Rite?”

From the way they were talking about it, you almost felt embarrassed to say no. You hunch your shoulders and meekly shake your head at him.

Huai’an noticed your timid state. “Well isn't this exciting?” He quietly asked Goldet. He then turned to you. “Lantern Rite truly is a wonderful experience so I have no doubt that you'll enjoy it. Plus I can teach you how to make Xiao Lanterns!” He gives you an encouraging smile.

You give them both a wide eyed stare. “So… I'll be able to go to Lantern Rite? You don't need me for anything?”

Goldet shook her head while laughing. “No, you silly girl. Everybody will be in the city to release lanterns, so the inn won’t be very busy that night.” She gives you a soft smile. “Go and have fun.”

Shit I might just cry. You looked at Goldet teary eyed. “Boss!” You wept comically. “You're too kind, boss! Paying me in advance, giving me a roof over my head, letting me go to Lanter Rite! What did I ever do to have such a wonderful boss?” You cried out and glomped her into a hug. You were totally using your younger appearance as an advantage to act more childish because you would have never done this with any other boss.

Goldet laughed at you, reciprocating the hug. “And what did I do to deserve such a wonderful employee? You've been working so hard since you've started, it would be cruel of me not to let you go and enjoy the festival.” She tells you while swaying side to side. You've come to realize that Goldet was starting to become like the older sister you never had.

You both pull away from the hug. “Plus,” Goldet began, “I paid you early in advance so that you would be able to go shopping.” She gives you a cheeky smirk. “Can't have you wearing my clothes and your uniform the entire time you're here.”

You laugh at that. “You're right.” You grin at her and Huai'an. “Thank you both so much, for all that you've done for me.” You say sincerely.

“Of course [Name]. Now go have fun shopping.” She gestures to the balcony. “I think you've just about swept the floorboards down to splinters.”

You thank Goldet again and give her one last hug before running to your room to change. But as you were making your way up the stairs, Goldet called out to you. “Oh [Name]! Um… also,” she trailed off uncertainly.

You crinkle your eyebrows in confusion. “What's up?”

“If you're able to…” she cleared her throat. “... could you... try to convince Xiao to go with you?” She asked. She then let out a sigh. “We're not close, I wouldn't know how to ask him myself. But it seems that you've grown familiar with him.”

You look at her confused. You? Being close with Xiao? Yeah, the thought sounds nice but there's no way you have already ‘grown familiar’ with him in just a week. If anything he tolerates you at best since you've forcefully wormed your way into his life.

“Really?” You tilt your head. “Xiao doesn't seem to be one for crowds.” Sorry Aether, I might have to steal your idea. “I mean, I'll try and convince him but I can't make any promises.”

Goldet let out a resigned sigh. “I suppose you're right… Anyway! Just thought I'd mention it. You should get yourselves down to the harbor.”

She then shoos you off with a smile. “Get going! If you leave too late, the city will be crowded with people and you won't be able to make the most of it.”

You nod enthusiastically. “Yes ma’am! Happy Lantern Rite!” You wave to her and Huai'an.

They both wave back. “Happy Lantern Rite!”

—

You burst into your room, practically vibrating in excitement at the thought of having your own clothes. You hurriedly started to strip out of your uniform, unaware of the curious gaze that came from your current roommate.

Xiao was currently leaning against the railing on the balcony that accompanied the room and was wondering why you were in such a rush. As he turned to question you, he instantly turned back around upon seeing you reach behind yourself to start buttoning your dress, keeping his gaze on the scenery before him. Xiao let out a deep breath and rubbed his forehead in aggitaion. I just can't get used to her doing that.

However, when you start to undress, you notice Xiao quickly turn around out of the corner of your eyes. Halting your movements, you call out to the young adeptus as you buttoned your uniform back up. “Sorry Xiao! I didn't know you were there!” And you made your way to the bathroom.

Hearing you say his name made Xiao tense up in surprise and furrow his eyebrows. He was one hundred percent certain that you would have just kept undressing in the middle of the room, being the shameless mortal that you are, but you didn't. You instead moved to change in a different room. Huh… perhaps she does have some decency.

You quickly came out of the bathroom after that interaction, dressed in Goldet’s clothes for the last time. Seeing Xiao still out on the balcony, you walk up to his side while enjoying the warm breeze.

Xiao looked at you from the corner of his eyes, nearly seeing the excitement radiate off you. “Where are you going in such a rush?” He asked. You perk up when hearing his voice and swivel your head to him.

“Goldet is letting me go experience the festival!” You exclaimed excitedly. “Isn't that great?”

Xiao rolled his eyes and let out a scoff. “What's so great about releasing glowing trash into the sky only for it to return to the sea?”

You hummed. “Well, it's like any other tradition I suppose. It's not so much the actual festival or ritual that matters but more of the meaning behind it instead.” You shrug. “Plus it gives me an excuse to go shopping, you coming with?”

“No.”

You let out a groan and roll your eyes. Even though you were expecting it, you couldn't help but feel a little disheartened at his answer. “Why not?” You question. Although I already know why.

Xiao gave you a look. “I don't enjoy large crowds of people.”

You let out a sigh. “Fiiiiine,” you drawl out, “no means no so I guess I'll stop bothering you about it.”

Xiao raised an eyebrow. Really? She's going to quit just like that? He looked at you dubiously.

“For now.” You added mischievously with a smirk.

There it is. Xiao should have known better. He found out that you were too damn stubborn to give up easily pretty quickly. He shook his head at you. “Do you plan on leaving soon?” He changed the subject.

You nod. “I was going to leave as soon as I changed but then I saw you and just had to talk to you.”

That made Xiao scrunch his eyebrows. “You just had to talk to me? Why's that?”

You look towards him and give him a closed eyes smile. “Because I wanted too! Plus you're my friend and I enjoy your company.”

Xiao gave you a once over. A heavy feeling settled in his chest when you referred to him as a “friend”. That word left a bitter taste in his mouth. Everyone that he ever considered a friend had either died or left him in some way, and he never bothered to keep in contact with the current adepti, so the thought of you wanting to be in his company was worrying. Who knows how long it'll be until his karmic debt finally catches up to him…

And drags you along with him.

Xiao narrowed his eyes at you. You immediately took notice of his tense state and swallowed at the harsh glare he gave you. Uh oh. You let out an uncomfortable laugh. I don't think he liked that.

“What have I told you about getting close?” He asked harshly which caused you to curl in on yourself slightly.

“In the thousands of years that have passed, I have taken countless wraiths,” he began, “so if you want no trouble, it’s best you keep your distance from me.” After he finished scolding you he turned to leave, going to do who knows what. You watched as he seemingly stormed away. Slightly panicking that he was leaving because you had upset him, you steeled your nerves and asked the first thing that came to your head.

“But what if I want trouble?”

Your question made Xiao stop in his tracks. He turned to look at you confused. You wore an expression that was full of confidence that waived slightly.

“What if I don’t want to keep my distance away from you?” You continued. “You told me to “stay out of your way or all that awaits me is regret”, right?” You quickly stride over to him and jab a finger in his chest.

“Well guess what honey? That's a risk I'm willing to take.” You tell him fiercely. “I make my own choices and if I happen to make bad choices then I will deal with the consequences of those choices.” You place a hand on your chest and glare at him determinedly.

“You have no say in what I ultimately can and can't do, Xiao. Only. I. do.” You finally finish and place your hands on your hips defiantly.

Xiao looked at you blankly, trying to process what you had just said. When he finally did, he looked at you sternly. “Is that really what you want?”

“More than anything.” Your eyes bore deep into him, not wavering in the slightest in your decision. “You saved my life. The least I can do for you is offer you my company and assistance in any way for not letting me splatter all over the ground. Even if you don't want it.”

After a few heartbeats of silence, Xiao reluctantly gave in and sighed while crossing his arms. “You are the most troublesome human I've had the displeasure of knowing.”

You smiled triumphantly. “Glad we're on the same page!”

“Well I'll be heading off now. Do you need anything?” You ask as you start heading towards the door.

“Nothing in the city would be of use to an adeptus.” He responds. “Don't forget your blade.”

You promptly made a 180 turn and walked towards your nightstand where a little dagger laid. Since you weren't able to fully wield a bigger weapon and don't understand how they do the whole whooshy thing to make their weapons disappear, I think he called it “particulation” or something like that, Xiao insisted that you had some form of weapon to protect yourself with.

You grabbed the knife and clipped it parallel to your belt, allowing your shirt to conceal it. “I don't see the reason as to why I have to have this thing. Aren't the Millelith scattered along the road to Liyue?” You then turn to Xiao and tilt your head. “Plus I can just call you whenever I'm in trouble.” Though that would probably be a last resort for me.

“I don't trust those lousy soldiers.” Xiao huffed.

You raised your eyebrow and pursed your lips, nodding in agreement. “Yeah… I don't blame ya.”

“Anyways,” you shrug, “are you sure you don't want to come with me?”

Xiao only shook his head. “Best you go alone. There's no need for me to be there.”

You look at him with big doe eyes, trying to convince him to at least walk you to the harbor. “But the road from here to Liyue Harbor is long and full of dangers... I need someone to ensure my safety!” You exclaim, seemingly scared.

“That's why I gave you your blade.” The adeptus gave you a bored look upon his handsome face.

You then startled Xiao when you clapped your hands into a prayer position and brought them to your head. “O Vigilant Yaksha, please escort me safely to the city!” You cry out.

Xiao tensed at your sudden decloration. Normally, Xiao was used to other’s praying to him and hearing their wishes but when you did it, it made him feel… fidgety. You seemed to hold yourself in a high regard that you didn't let anyone have control over your actions, so it was odd to see you with your head bowed to him.

Xiao crossed his arms and looked away from you. “Quit that. There's no need for you to bow to me.”

You perked up, an excited gleam in your eyes. “So you'll come with me?”

“So be it. I won't be going into the city though.” He retorted.

You throw him a smile. “That's fine!” You straighten back up and open the door. “Come on, let's go!” You wave at him.

Xiao shook his head at your antics and began to follow you. And to think that she's a grown adult. “Wait.” He called out.

You stop in your tracks and look back at Xiao confused. “Huh? Why?”

Xiao walks up to your left side and grabs your bicep. You looked at him even more perplexed. What is he doing?

You then began to feel a strong gust of wind swirl around you and in an instant, darkness flooded your vision and a familiar feeling of nausea came over you. When you opened your eyes again, you saw the gates of Liyue below the hill you were on.

You put your hands on your knees, trying to keep from puking everywhere, as you begin to process that Xiao had just teleported you both to Liyue.

“Here we are.” Xiao released your arm.

“Would have been nice to know beforehand.” You groan. After feeling like you weren't going to empty your guts out, you look up and let out a small gasp.

In front of you stood an archway that led to the bridge that entered into the city. Looking beyond that, you could see the beautiful Chinese architecture of the buildings that filled Liyue Harbor with the magnificent decorations of Lantern Rite along the city. You gaped at the scene before you. Holy shit…

Xiao swiveled his head to give a hard stare. “Don't go and cause any trouble.” He warned you.

That caused you to let out a snort. “Yeah, yeah, sure. What are you, my dad?” You raised an eyebrow at him. “Why did we teleport?”

“So I wouldn't have to listen to talk my ear off all day.” He responded bluntly, causing you to let out an offended gasp. “And I told you,” he continued before you could tell him off. “so long as you are in Liyue, it is my duty to protect you and not let any harm come to you.” Xiao reiterated.

“Wow… you really are my dad. But that's a pretty big responsibility. You sure you can follow through with it?” You question.

“Are you questioning my abilities as an adeptus?” He asked gruffly. He then leaned in closer to your face. “I always take care of my duties.” Xiao finished while staring you straight in the eyes.

Your eyes widened in surprise at his declaration. The way he said that so firmly and confidently made your chest feel light before tightening, a familiar feeling of guilt settling in, causing you to look away and frown. Shit… not now.

Noticing the change in your demeanor, Xiao tilted his head confused. “What's wrong?”

Shaking your head to get rid of the self-deprecating thoughts that were forming, you look up at him with reassuring eyes. “It's nothing.” You tell him with a small smile.

Going back to your seemingly old self, you give Xiao a look. “Alrighty,” You turn towards him and hold out your pinkie, “pinky promise it then.”

He gave your pinky an inquisitive look. You furrow your eyebrows in confusion. “You have heard of a pinky promise before, right?”

Xiao squinted his eyes at you. “Is this another strange human gesture?”

“Eh, I wouldn't necessarily say it's strange. More endearing than anything.” You hold your dominant hand and make a “give it” gesture. “Give me your hand.”

Xiao hesitantly puts his hand in yours. You close it into a fist, only leaving out his pinky. You then bring your own pinky and lock it with his own. “Now say your promise again.” Xiao looked at you reluctantly. You let out a groan. “Come on dude, just do it please?” You say giving him your best puppy dog eyes.

Xiao sighed. “I promise, so long as you are in Liyue, that I will protect you and not let any harm come to you.” He looked at your still entwined pinkies. As he said this, a gentle breeze drifted between the two of as if it was sealing the promise between you and Xiao. Xiao watched as the wind suddenly made your hair flutter around you and the way the afternoon sun casted just the right amount of shadows on your features as you looked up at him. At the moment he didn't see the fifteen year old features that made up your current face but the mature, more sharper features that he saw from your most recent pictures and student ID.

“Now what?” Her hands are really warm.

You give him a smile. “That's it!” You then let go of his pinky, bringing your hand back to your side.

He looked at you confused. “That's it? Nothing special happens?”

“The special thing about pinky promises is that the person who broke the promise gets their pinky cut off by the other person who made the promise.” You say to him.

“That's quite gruesome for such a little act.” Humans confused him so much.

“I think it was more of a scare tactic for kiddos than anything really.” You shrug. You then started walking to the city. “I'll see you later Xiao!” You call out with a grin.

“Be careful.” He told you with a subtle nod, which made your smile somehow even brighter, before teleporting away. You then turned back around and practically skipped to Liyue.

—

You made your way down the hill and soon came upon the gate that led to the city. In front of it stood two guards, you couldn't bother to remember their names, who gave you a nice ‘welcome to Liyue Harbor’ as you walked past them. As you walked over the bridge you saw the Mingxiao Lantern standing tall in all its glory. Continuing on, you finally stepped foot in the city. With a look of amazement on your face, you spun around while trying to take in all of the decorations.

I can't believe I'm actually here… You let out a disbelieving laugh and began to feel your eyes become misty. Am I really tearing up right now? Oh my God I am. You shake your head trying to get your emotions in check. As you carry on walking further, the infamous somewhat creepy shipowner, Bolai spots you looking around like a lost puppy. Which you really weren't, you were just hypnotized by the decorations.

“Hello young lady!” He called out to you. You whipped your head towards him, slightly startled. When you realized who was talking, you made a small grimace. Oh… it's that really creepy guy that I don't like.

As he makes his way towards you, you put your guard up as you straighten your back. “Hello.”

Bolai raised an eyebrow as he stopped short of you. “What a strange accent. Are you perhaps foreign?” He questioned.

You furrow your eyebrows. I have an accent? “Something like that.” You reply with a shrug your shoulders nonchalantly and a ghost of a smile on your face. Ain't no way in hell are you talking about yourself to him.

Bolai narrowed his eyes at you suspiciously. How interesting. “Quite the mysterious one, you are. Tell me, young lady, where do you hail from? Fontaine? Sumeru?”

“Sure.” You tell him halfheartedly. Why the fuck is he grilling me so hard? I should probably give him some sort of answer so he'll leave me alone. “I traveled a lot so I never really had a distinctive place to call home.” You smoothly lied. Well… it wasn't entirely a lie.

Believing your little fib, Bolai’s face softens into a look of realization. A young girl like you didn't have a home growing up? Is that what you were hinting at?

Taking notice of the subtle pity look that crossed his gaze, you groan internally. Great, now he's going to think that I never had a home. Whoops!

“Well just know that you are always welcomed here in Liyue,” He reassured you, kinda. Your eyebrows raise slightly in surprise from that. “And if you ever need anything, and I mean anything, you can always come to me.” He finished ominously while giving you a smile that seemed a little too kind.

You leaned your torso away from the strange man and looked at him mildly creeped out, yet kept a polite smile on your face. “Duly noted… thanks.” Trailing off, you maneuvered your way around and sped walked away from Bolai. A fake shiver runs through your body. Ugh… just as creepy as I remember.

You continued further into the city. Your head was constantly moving from left to right, up and down, taking in the gorgeous decorations that littered the buildings and streets. Pulling out the Mora pouch that Goldet gave you, you recounted the money that you earned from your first week working. 60,500 Mora… that should be plenty right? You paused. Actually, isn't that a lot of money? This seems like a lot for just a week of work. After pondering a few moments, you shrug the thought off.

You made sure to visit almost all the food stalls that were on the harbor to experience Liyue’s cuisine authentically, as well as how to make Xiao lanterns. After doing all the activities you possibly could, you made your way up the gigantic steps that led to the main road of the city.

As you made it to the top, you put your hands on your knees trying to catch your breath. From being on your feet all day from working plus the training the Xiao puts you through, it's safe to say you were pretty damn tired. You're kidding me. I can not be this out of shape! You thought.

Heaving one last breath, you straighten back up. You looked out to see the streets bustling with people with a slight grimace on your face at the crowds of people. You absolutely hated crowds of people because being around them just completely drains your energy.

However, your curiosity and astonishment motivated you to move forward. As you walked through the city, you kept an eye out for any clothing shops because you needed your own clothes, since that's pretty much what you came here for.

Letting your gaze continue to search through the windows of various different shops, your eyes landed on an article of clothing that caught your attention. You quickly make your way to the store and opened the doors, causing a bell above the door to let out a little chime and alert the store owner and other shoppers of your presence.

“Welcome!” They called out. You give them a small wave in response as you make your way over to the outfit. Once you made it, you reached your hand out to feel the smooth silk of the fabric. It was a beautiful sleeveless, purple dress that reached the middle of your thighs. Around the skirt of the dress laid two longer pieces that were a darker purple and draped along the sides. The top of the dress was two different colors, the right being a dark purple that were the same color of the longer pieces while the left was a lighter purple that matched the skirt, and had a high collar and with an opening in the chest area. The dress also adorned what looked like a wide obi belt, but you weren't too sure. The whole dress was trimmed with gold accents and had gold swirls all along it. Next to the dress were a pair of low ankle boots that matched the color theme.

This was the one.

You yoink it off the rack and look around for the owner. When you found them, you asked if they had any dressing rooms to try on the dress to which they led you to one. You begin to strip as soon as the door closes behind you. I really hope it fits otherwise I'll be heart broken.

As you slipped the dress over your head you zipped up the side and fastened the button on the collar. When you turn around to face the mirror, your eyes widen in surprise. Holy shit… I've never had a dress fit me so well. The dress sat magnificently on you and accentuated your curves. However… You looked down at your chest to see that your bra from your universe was most definitely visible thanks to the opening that went from the collar of the dress to the belt. I'm gonna have to do something about that. Looking back in the mirror you took notice of your tattoos. Those as well. You thought for a moment. Plus I don't particularly like wearing dresses unless I have leggings or something underneath it.

You begin to take the dress off and put your other clothes back on. I wonder if they would have some kind of body suit or something… You put the dress back on the hanger but continue to hold on to it. Making your way back towards the racks of clothing you begin your search.

As you walk through the aisles of clothing, you notice a black full body suit hanging on one of the racks. Bingo! You thought with a smile. You made your way to the suit, but you failed to notice the other body that was backing up into you.

Feeling a sudden weight on your right side, you stumble a little due to the force. However, the person that ran into had lost their balance and started to fall to the ground. Eyes widening in surprise, you were quick to catch them by grabbing them under their arms. When you looked down to check on the person to see if they were okay, you felt your breath hitch.

Staring back at you startled are lavender colored eyes that were lined with dark, thick lashes that belong to the one and only Ganyu.

You begin to feel your cheeks grow warm as you look down at the gorgeous half-adeptus in your arms. Ohfuckohfuckohfu– “Are you okay?” You asked worriedly. When you looked up to see what could have caused her to trip, you were greeted with the sight of a man that looked a little too pleased with himself. As he looked away from Ganyu and up to you, you made sure to give him the coldest glare you could manage – which made the man’s smirk falter and back up just a little.

Fucker.

Ganyu blinked as she came back to her senses. “Y-yes! I'm alright.” She gives you an appreciative smile. “Thank you.”

You return her smile. “It's no problem.” As you help her upright, you lean closer to her ear. “Do you know this guy?” You whispered. She looks at you from the corner of her eye and subtly shakes her head no.

You looked up to the creep and gave him an ‘innocent’ smile. “Is everything alright here?”

Realizing the slight hostile undertone in your voice, the man gives you a strained look. “Y-yes, everything's fine!” He stuttered and gestured to Ganyu. “I just thought I'd give this young lady a little help.”

Your eyes flicker from her back to the man. “She looks to be just fine on her own. What does she need help with?”

The man’s opens then closes, trying to think of a good excuse. “I… uh… well, she-!” You cut the man off with a raised hand.

“I'm going to stop you there. You're making yourself look like a fool.” You chastise. “It's obvious what you're doing and you're clearly making her uncomfortable. I suggest you stop now before you keep digging your grave even deeper.”

Eyes blown open and mouth agape, the man stares at you in shock from your words. Was I really that obvious? The man thought. He felt himself cowering in on himself under the heavy gaze of the two girls.

“Well, whatever.” He scoffed while avoiding eye contact, seemingly trying to act tough. “It's not like she was actually attractive.” Yet he received no reaction from either of the girls, as they continued to stare. The man began to fidget from their silence, then quickly turned around and left the store.

Both you and Ganyu let out a sigh. “Thankfully, that's over.” You tilt your head at Ganyu. “Does that happen often?”

“No, that was the first time it has ever happened.” She reveals. She then bows toward you. “Thank you for helping me.” When Ganyu straightens back up, she places a hand on her chest while giving you a sweet smile. “My name is Ganyu, secretary of the Yuhai Pavilion.”

God, she's even more gorgeous in real life… You flush a little as you give her a small bow in return. “It's nice to meet you, Miss Ganyu. I'm [Name] [Last Name].”

“It's a pleasure to meet you as well, Miss [Last Name]. Again, I do apologize for bumping into you earlier.” She tells you.

You wave your hand dismissively. “Just call me [Name], please. Calling me by my last name makes me feel old.” You joke.

Ganyu tilts her head curiously at you. “If I may ask, how old are you?” She asks innocently.

You pause, processing her question. Damn it. “I'm fifteen.” You manage out. I really hate telling people that because then they'll treat me like a child…

“Really?” She wonders aloud. “You're quite mature for your age and you seemed to know exactly what to do in the situation that happened earlier…” She trailed off.

You freeze hearing that. Oh shit! Has she caught on already?! You let out an awkward laugh. “Yeah, mature…” You say while making a subtle face. Although Xiao would disagree otherwise.

“Anyways, thank you once again for helping me. Is there anything I can do for you in return?” Ganyu asks.

You bring a finger to your chin and hum in thought. “Actually there is.” While Ganyu waits patiently for your request, you give her a smile. “Would you know of any stores that would have a body suit?”

The beautiful half-adeptus perks up in response. “As a matter of fact, this store has the same ones that I wear. Let me show you.” She then beckons you to follow her.

You do so with a skip in your step.

—

You and Ganyu soon left the shop, with you now wearing your new outfit that screamed main character. Thankfully the body suit was able to cover all of your tattoos. As you continued through the city, making light conversations with Ganyu, you watched as two little boys, who looked to be around the age of ten, chased each other around the streets while laughing. You watched them with a small smile. While you didn't like kids, you didn't necessarily hate them either. Plus it was kind of your profession to be able to take care of them as well. But you definitely didn't want any kids. Well, right now at least.

You watched as they weaved through the legs of strangers, trying to avoid getting hit. However, as the one with light blue hair raised a hand out in order to tag the other little boy with darker blue hair and an asymmetrical cut, a man that wasn't paying attention to what was in front of him went to take a step and kneed the poor boy hard in the head. The pale blue haired boy went down in an instant.

You let out a snort and raised a hand to your mouth to hide that you were laughing. “That poor kid just ate shit.” You couldn't help but let out a few chuckles at the kids unfortunate situation. Ganyu looked at you confused from the corner of her eyes. I'm a horrible person.

“I'm so sorry, buddy! Are you okay?” The young man that hit the boy asked as he crouched down. He received no reply as the boy laid still. The man started to shake the boy, seemingly beginning to panic.

“Hey…” He called out once more. “Are you okay?” He shook the boy frantically. Still, he received no reply. “This isn't funny, kid. Wake up!”

You stopped laughing and straightened your posture as your ‘doctor mode’ kicked in. Now you were getting concerned. Thousands of scenarios ran through your mind as to why the kid wasn't getting up. Is he concussed? Is he faking it? What's going on?

The other little boy that was running away, turned around when he heard yelling. His orange eyes widened in fear. “Chongyun!” He cried out and began running back to his friend.

Realization dawned on you. Those kids were Xingqiu and Chongyun. Your feet moved before you even noticed it as you rushed towards Chongyun and the man. Ganyu jumped when you began running and raised a hand to stop you. “[Name], wait!” But you were too far away to hear her over the people walking around.

A crowd began to form around the two to see what was happening. This caused the young man to panic even more. He looked up to the crowd. “Is there a doctor here? Please, anyone!” He cried out desperately, yet no one made a move to help.

You shook your head at the crowd. I see that the Bystander Effect is still a thing here. Xingqiu made it to Chongyun before you did, then got to his knees as soon as he reached him and started tapping Chongyun on the shoulder. “Chongyun?” He asked. “Wake up ‘Yun!”

You finally made it to the crowd and started elbowing your way through. “Excuse me! I'm a doctor, please let me through!” You yell out to the pedestrians. They turned and looked at you skeptically. Your lip curled up into a sneer at the people's ignorance. I don't have time for this.

“I said MOVE!” You yell out startling them in the process and forcing them to move. “Thank you!” You say exasperatedly, not forgetting your manners apparently. You quickly made your way over to Chongyun and got to your knees behind his head, gently placing your hands on either of his cheeks in order to stabilize his neck, in case he had injured it. Xingqiu noticed you and looked at you with tears eyes, worried out of his mind for his friend.

You looked to the man who started this whole mess. “What's going on? What happened?” You asked hurriedly while you checked Chongyun’s pulse.

The man seemed to be in a daze as he answered. “This kid just came out of nowhere. I had accidentally hit him with my knee and now he's not waking up.” He explained shakily. “Then this other kid just now showed up.” He pointed to Xingqiu. He then looked at you confused. “Aren't you a little young to be a doctor?”

You look at the man and give him a glare. “I don't think that matters right now since I'm the only one who even bothered to step in and help the poor child.” You glared at the rest of the crowd when you finished which made them avoid eye contact with you. Murmurs started to float through the crowd. What was this girl doing? Who is she? She's clearly too young to be a doctor.

You ignore their not so quiet whispering and look over to Xingqiu, giving him a reassuring smile. “Hey buddy,” you started softly. “What's your name?”

The normally composed boy let out a sniffle. “Xingqiu.” He responded. “My friend, Chongyun, isn't opening his eyes! Can you help?” He asked pleadingly.

“Don't worry baby, I'm a doctor.” You tell him, the pet name subconsciously slipping out of habit from when you worked with kids. “I'm going to help him and make sure he's okay.” Seventy beats per minute. Normal heart rate. Nineteen breaths per minute. Normal respiratory rate. If he wakes up soon, it'll most likely be just a slight concussion. You mentally start going down the checklist for head trauma patients when Chongyun finally opens his eyes.

Quickly taking notice, you yell at the crowd. “Everyone back up please! The kid is waking up so give him some space!” The crowd immediately backs away. You look back down at the boy who was wincing from the sunlight.

“Hey honey,” You gently try to get his attention, “can you hear me?”

Chongyun opened his eyes fully and looked at you, confused before squinting from the sunlight. From his position on the ground and the way the sunlight was hitting his baby blue eyes, you were able to see that his pupils were equal in size. Good. No anisocoria, no serious brain damage.

“Wha…?” Chongyun groaned out. With your hands on his cheeks, you gently tapped them to shift his attention back to you.

“Hey honey, look at me.” You instructed. “What's your name?”

The boy paused for a moment. “Chongyun.” He answered.

Alright that's one question. “It's nice to meet you Chongyun.” You smile at him. “Chongyun, do you know how old you are?” You continued.

“I'm ten.” He responded a little quicker this time. You nodded your head at him. That's two.

“Do you know where you're at, Chongyun?” You made sure to keep saying his name so that he would focus on you.

After a moment of silence, he responded. “I'm in Liyue.” He then closed his eyes and let out another groan. “My head hurts.”

“I know, dear. One last question, okay?” You tell him. He nods. “Do you know what happened to you?”

He thought for a moment. “I was… I was chasing Xingqiu,” said boy perked up in response to his name, “we were playing tag. I almost caught him then it suddenly got dark.” He opened his eyes and looked at you. “Why did it go dark?”

You give him a look of reassurance. “Your noggin got hit pretty hard and you fell down. You were asleep for a few minutes but you'll be okay.” You tilt your head. That's the last question. A and O times 4. He's alert and aware. “Does your head still hurt?” You asked as you began to palpate his neck, feeling for any serious injuries. You removed your hands when you found none.

He nodded. “Do you feel pain anywhere else? How about your neck?” He shakes his head in response.

“Good. Do you feel like sitting up for me sweetie?” You ask. Chongyun slowly moves to sit upright with your help and you guide him to the curb to sit on so he was out of the road. Xingqiu crawled over to his friend to see how he was doing, with you reminding him to overwhelm Chongyun. As you look out towards the crowd, you see Ganyu, who was carrying a cup of what you assumed was water, make her way over to your little group. She hands you the cup, which you thank her profusely, and you give it to Chongyun.

“Drink it slowly.” You advise him. “I don't want you choking on me now that you're awake.” You tease gently while sending a subtle wink to Xingqiu, causing the young boy to giggle.

He gingerly takes the cup from your hand. “Thank you ma’am.”

“Thank you, ma’am!” Xingqiu tells you as well.

“It's not a problem.” You reassure both of them with a smile. As soon as they saw that Chongyun was okay, the crowd dispersed and continued what they were doing. However, not without whispering amongst themselves how seemingly a teenager knew exactly what to do when taking care of an injured child.

You continued to sit with the two boys to monitor Chongyun, in case something suddenly went awry. Ganyu stayed as well, astounded at the young girl before her.

“What you did was quite impressive Miss [Name]!” The half adeptus praised. “I didn't know you were so vast in medical knowledge, and at such a young age too.”

You let out a few chuckles. “Well you only just met me today Miss Ganyu.”

She then gives you a sheepish look. “I was surprised to see you help him so quickly,” she leans in closer to whisper to you, “given that you were laughing at him earlier.”

“Oh… yeah,” You let out an uncomfortable laugh. “As long as they're not seriously hurt or in any danger, kids getting hit or falling is hilarious to me.” You let out a wince. “Wow, that sounds awful.”

“Yet you didn't hesitate to help him as soon as you saw that something was wrong.” Ganyu pointed out.

You lifted your hand to pet Chongyun on the head. “Well I've always wanted to be able to put my life to good use and help people in some way, so what better way than this? Helping people in their times of need.” You give Ganyu a cheeky smirk. “I may act all tough but I'm actually a big softie.”

“I'm well aware of that now.” Ganyu chuckles.

As you visited with the half-adeptus and two young boys, you failed to notice a pair of red eyes gazing at you with a look of mischief.

—

After triple checking that Chongyun was okay and him constantly telling you that he was, you wave the boys goodbye who returned it in full. Ganyu then tells you that she should continue running errands for Lady Nigguang and you may or may not have freaked out a bit inside when you heard her name. Waving to the half adeptus as well, you continue to wander aimlessly through the city.

You soon found yourself at the Wanmin restaurant, chef Mao working swiftly in the kitchen. He soon brought out your order and after paying, you made your way to the south side wharf. As you make your way to the dock, you sit down on the edge and look out at the ocean before you while swinging your legs. You welcomed the smell of salt water and the ocean breeze that fluttered around you, yet it did nothing to quarrel your racing thoughts.

I can't believe I've already been in Teyvat for a week and still don't have a fucking clue as to how I got here in the first place. You slide your hands down your face and clasped them together in front of your mouth. And Xiao has been no help to me in that matter unfortunately. The guy still doesn't talk to me that much anyways. Plus training with him has been difficult as well. I've learned that he's a super strict teacher and I've only managed to construct only two Geo items with him this past week but that was only when I was extremely frustrated or upset, so I have no clue as to how I'm going to be able to properly control the element… or that ‘particulation’ thingy with the weapons as well.

You drop your head in your hands and let out a whine. This is all so confusing! I really wish someone or something just give me some fucking answers!

You then look up and run your hands through your hair. Turning your head to the left, you see the giant Mingxiao lantern that was ready to be released once it was dark enough. You let out a sigh and try to relax. I should probably start looking for a place to watch it when it releases tomorrow. You stand up and start walking back to Feiyan Slope. Soon you crossed over the little bridge that connects Chihu Rock and Feiyan Slope. You decided to stick closer to the buildings to try and stay away from the crowds.

However, as you were too preoccupied to not hit anybody, you didn't notice a hand reaching out from an alleyway until it was too late. You felt a harsh tug on your left arm which caused you to let out a yelp. You quickly caught your bearings and when you turned to slapped your assailant, you froze as you saw a pale face that looked to be thirteen years old inches from yours. Red eyes with strange, floral shaped pupils came with the face and was framed with dark hair that faded into red.

Holy… Hu Tao? You wondered. But she looks a lot younger? Younger than this “me” that's for sure.

You give her a confused smile. “Um… hello?” Am I just going to meet every character in Liyue today?

“You're the one Mr. Zhongli told me about!” She exclaims. “It's nice to meet you! My name is Hu Tao!”

You swore you felt your soul leave your body when you heard his name. ZHONGLI?! HE’S LOOKING FOR ME?! OH SHI-! You're cut from your thoughts when Hu Tao starts pulling you. “Hey! W-wait!”

“C’mon! Mr. Zhongli is waiting for you back at the funeral parlor. It seemed like he wasn't too happy with you so we shouldn't keep him waiting any longer!” She giggles.

Yup, I'm officially dead. Maybe now I can go back to my world and be normal again.

Soon the young girl brings you to the doors of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor. You gnawed on your lower lip. Fuck… I'm more nervous now than I was when I was taking the MCAT. Maybe because I'm meeting a FUCKING GOD?! You begin to slightly hyperventilate, the reality of the situation finally sitting in. FUCKFUCKFUCKFU-

You are once again snapped out of your internal freak out by Hu Tao pulling on your arm. The girl pushes the doors open while bringing you with her. The inside is about what you expected from a funeral parlor with coffins lining along the walls along with different types of shrines. After a few twists and turns, you and Hu Tao reach a very intricate door with a plate on it that says “Consultant: Zhongli”. You clench your jaw as you could practically feel the intense aura that radiated from him even through the door.

Without even knocking, Hu Tao busts through his door. “Mr. Zhongli! I found her! This is the girl you were looking for right?”

The wind gets knocked out of you upon finally seeing him in person and your knees about damn near buckle from underneath when you make eye contact with him. If you thought Xiao’s eyes were intense, then you don't even know how to describe Zhongli’s.

The Geo Archon narrowed his eyes towards you. “Indeed it is, Hu Tao.” His deep voice rumbled throughout the entire room and shook you to your core. “You may take your leave now.”

The young girl pouted. “Aw… and I wanted to see you scold her.”

A quick glance from the corner of his eyes was enough to make Hu Tao take the hint and leave, however not without whining on her way out.

As soon as Hu Tao was gone, Zhongli stood up and took large strides towards you, causing you to start panicking. Hu Tao, why did you have to leave me alone with an Archon?! Soon the man towered over you, forcing you to look up at him. The shadows that casted over his being due to him blocking out the overhead light made his striking amber eyes all the more intimidating. You felt like you were about to be pounced on like a mouse cornered by a barn cat.

Then Zhongli lowered his face closer to yours. “So you're the outlander who took my vision without permission.” He accuses. You feel your breath hitch in your throat and your palms beginning to clam up. You had never been more intimidated in your life and you have fought against people twice your size no problem before!

“Oh…! Um, t-that was me?” You stutter out. Your eyes widen when you realize just how fucking stupid you sounded.

Zhongli coolly looked at you. “Of course it was you. I knew that you were not of this world the moment you arrived in Liyue.” He tells you firmly while staring straight into your soul. “Now, do inform me on how you were able to acquire this power without a Vision granted from me?”

The silence was deafening in the room. You thought you were just about to faint until your experience from working under pressure in the emergency room decided to kick in and not fail you as you quickly composed yourself.

“In my defense,” you raise your hands. “it was completely out of my control.”

Zhongli raised an eyebrow, unconvinced.

You let out a sigh. “Here's what happened. A saw a Statue of Seven in Guili Plains, in all of its glory, and as soon as I was near it I felt a pulling sensation. Later that day I was extremely frustrated and all of a sudden a rock pillar just came out of the ground.”

Zhongli hummed in thought before finally standing back to his full height, allowing you to breathe again. He brought a hand to his chin and looked down in thought. “Interesting. I have not heard of such instances where that has ever happened, with me or any of the other Archons.” His eyes met yours again. “So what makes you special? So special that even the adeptus Xiao has decided to look after you?”

You couldn't help the exaggerated laugh that bubbled out of your throat. “Ha! I wish I knew, but your guess is as good as mine sweetheart.” You pause. “I also know that you're Morax too… if you haven't figured that out yet.” You finish meekly. WHAT THE FUCK AM I SAYING?!

The Geo Archon’s eyes widen at you. “How did you know that? Where exactly did you come from?” He interrogates.

You quickly explain to him the same thing that you told Xiao, that he was from a video game and that you were aware of what was to come in the future as well as how you somehow physically de-aged.

“Interesting.” Zhongli thought for a moment. “It appears that you come from a similar universe in which our’s exists but in a completely different manner.”

“How much of our universe do you know through this ''game”?” He questions.

“I know of some future events that will happen, but the lore of the story is still a complete mystery. We don't even know how long the main story of the game is.” You say.

Zhongli pondered. “I see. If you know what is to happen in the future, then it would be best to let things run their course and not intervene with it.”

“Yeah, the butterfly effect and shit like that.” Your eyebrows shoot up in surprise as you subconsciously swore. You quickly slap a hand over your mouth. “Sorry… it's a bad habit.” You apologize quietly.

Zhongli decided to ignore your mishap. “So you're aware of what could happen. And since you're already aware of my identity, I presume that you know that I go by Zhongli now?”

You nod your head. “Yes, I do.” You then realized that you haven't introduced yourself. You quickly bowed towards him. “My name is [Name] by the way! [Name] [Last Name].”

Zhongli nodded. “It's a pleasure to finally know the name of the outlander that took my Vision without consent.”

You make a face at his snarky comment. “Is it a pleasure though?” You muttered rhetorically.

“Let's continue with your situation.” Zhongli diverted the conversation back on track. He then looked towards you. “Perhaps if you tried to remember the events that happened to you before you came here, that may give us a better idea as to the reason why you're here.” He then gestures to one of the chairs in front of his desk. “Please have a seat. It will be easier for you to remember if you're comfortable.”

“I do remember being on a bridge but that's the only thing I know now.” Moving to sit down, you tuck your dress skirt underneath you and cross your legs, trying to look somewhat professional. You take a deep breath as you gather thoughts. What happened before coming here? What was I doing? You lean forward and rest your elbows on your knee while interlacing your hands, then put your forehead against them. You close your eyes and your eyebrow twitches into a furrow as you begin to concentrate. [e/c] eyes move rapidly behind eyelids as memories start to form.

“A hospital…” You began. “I was working a shift in the hospital.”

—

“Hi Miss Bradford!” You cheerily call out as you knock on the door. The old woman looked up from her magazine and smiled at you with dull blue eyes.

“Dr. [Last Name]. How are you doing sweetheart?” She asks softly. Miss Bradford was a quiet old lady in her seventies with salt and pepper hair and the brightest, most gorgeous blue eyes you had ever seen.

That was before she had started chemotherapy.

Miss Bradford was your most recent patient. You had treated her a few months ago when she came to your emergency room with intense chest pains. After taking multiple different CAT scans and MRIs, you and several other doctors had concluded her diagnosis as breast cancer. Although you admitted her to Oncology, she kept having complications when she had started chemotherapy; causing you to see her quite frequently.

Today was the day Miss Bradford would start her third round of chemo and you decided to bring her her favorite lunch before starting. Miss Bradford was hell bent on beating this cancer but after her most recent round she had started to lose her appetite. Which was never a good sign for a cancer patient.

“I'm doing well, thank you. And I thought I told you to call me [Name]?” You grab a chair and pull it up next to her bed.

She gives you a small smile. “But you worked so hard to earn the title of a doctor. I'm only giving you the respect you deserve.”

You shook your head playfully at the older woman. “How're you feeling today?”

She let out a sigh. “Tired, but better than yesterday. I'm ready to get this damn treatment over with.” She grumbled.

“That's good! Do you feel like eating today?” You ask.

She shook her head. “Not really but knowing you, you'll probably force me to eat anyways.” She looked at the plastic sack in your hand. “Whatcha got there?”

“Well hopefully this will bring your appetite back for today. It's your favorite!” You raise the bag higher and place it on her food tray. “Almond Tofu! I remember you telling me that it was your go to desert when you lived in Singapore, so I had one of my foreign exchange friends teach me how to make it.” You let out a dramatic sigh. “I can't tell you how many times I messed up baking this damn dessert.”

Miss Bradford looked at the sweet treat with tears in her eyes. “Oh, [Name]…” She let out a wet laugh. “You didn't have to do that.”

You smiled at the older woman. “I know I didn't have to, but I wanted to.”

She suddenly reaches over as quickly as all the tubes hooked up to her allowed her and brought you into a tight hug. You fretted over her before she cut you off.

“Thank you, [Name].” She whispered. You reciprocated her hug gently.

“You're welcome, Miss Bradford. Though I can't guarantee it'll be just like the real thing.” You playfully warned.

She let out a laugh as she pulled away from the hug. “I'm sure it will be wonderful.” She gives you a grateful smile. She then evenly separates the dessert and gives you half of it. You shook your hands no at the offer.

“No no, Miss Bradford, I made this for you so you don't have to share it with me.” You politely decline.

She glares at you but smiles. “I know I don't have to but I want to.” She quipped.

You gasp. “How dare you throw my own words back at me!”

“Just take the damn dessert, Dr. [Last Name].” She laughed out loud.

Letting out a sigh, you grab the plate from her and begin to eat with her. You both chatted for a couple of minutes after finishing before you were paged to be back down in the emergency room. You grabbed the plastic container the dessert was in and threw it away. As you moved the chair back to its proper place, you looked at Miss Bradford.

Reaching a hand out, you place it over her own. “Thank you for eating today, Miss Bradford.” You tell her sincerely. “I know it's getting hard but all of the nurses are telling me that you're doing great.”

“Just two more rounds and it will be over.” You encouraged her.

The older woman nods as she grasps your hand and gives it a tight squeeze. A nonverbal thank you.

“Do you need anything else before I leave?” You ask.

She shakes her head. “No, Dr. [Last Name]. I'm quite alright. Now go save some lives.” She lets go of your hand and shoos you off.

You roll your eyes teasingly. “I'll be back to check on you after your treatment. Try not to see me this time around!” You open the door and wave back at her. “Good luck! You got this!” You then swiftly leave the room and head back to your station.

As soon as you were gone, Miss Bradford’s smile dropped immediately. She laid her head back and lifelessly looked at the ceiling. Tears started to fall from her cobalt eyes as she thought about you and the gift you had made for her.

“I'm gonna miss you, [Name].” She whispered into the empty room.

—

After three days, you fortunately had the day off from working so you immediately went to go see Miss Bradford.

You soon made it to the familiar room. “Hi Miss Bradford! How do you feel-” You stop in your tracks upon seeing Miss Bradford lying in front of you. The older woman looked nothing like what you had seen three days prior. Her beautiful salt and pepper hair had begun to fall out and her skin looked like it was barely hanging onto her bones.

You quickly come back to reality. This is what chemo does. And elderly people tend to not survive the drug. You remind yourself.

You take a deep breath and walk towards the bed. “Miss Bradford?” You call out. “It's me, Dr. [Last Name].”

The woman slowly opened her eyes. Her bleary and glazed over eyes tiredly searched for the voice calling out to her before landing on your form. Her dull blue eyes light up in recognition.

“[Name].” She croaked out yet still gave you a smile.

You give a smile right back to her. “Hi Miss Bradford.” You greet softly. You squat down next to the bed so it was easier to make eye contact. “How're you feeling?”

She let out a tired sigh. “Like shit.”

You chuckled quietly before you both sat in silence for a few moments. You open your mouth to say something but the older woman beats you to it.

“I don't think I'm gonna make this round, sweetheart.”

You clench your jaw hearing her statement. “Don't say that.” You tell her firmly. “I thought you wanted to kick this cancer’s ass?”

The poor woman couldn't even manage a chuckle. “Don't all patients say that?” She asked. She looks past you and out the window. “I think it's my time. I can feel it.”

She then closed her eyes and gave you a grateful smile while reaching up to cup your cheek. “Thank you, [Name], for sticking by my side even when my own children didn't. I couldn't have asked for a more wonderful doctor to take care of me.”

You held the hand that was on your cheek and gave the older woman a sad smile as if to say “I'm sorry for not doing enough”, yet she seemed to understand what your smile conveyed as she began to caress your cheek as a means to console you.

“Keep saving lives, Dr. [Last Name].”

The steady flat note of a heart rate monitor tells you that your patient has finally passed away.

Her hand that was on your cheek laid flaccid on your own. You closed your eyes and let out a shaky sigh. After a few minutes of sitting in silence with your deceased patient, you press the nurse’s call button. You then place her hand next to her on the bed. Shortly after several nurses come into the room and begin to console you while covering Miss Bradford’s body with the sheet. You watched them as they wheeled her out of the room.

She told you to keep saving lives and you plan on doing just fucking that.

—

It was dark out when you finally left the hospital after you said your last goodbyes to Miss Bradford. The temperature had dropped significantly causing a shiver to run down your spine and goosebumps form on your arms.

You're not going to lie. Even though she told you that she was ready and already accepted her death, you couldn't help but feel like you failed her; so you were feeling pretty depressed. Everybody was so determined to get her healthy again, to go back to a somewhat normal life again. But it was never that easy.

You passed several buildings as you continued home. Soon you were passing your current town's local park when you suddenly stopped, a sudden feeling of anxiety had come out of nowhere. It felt like there were eyes on you, watching your every move. Your face sets into a hard glare to try and look intimidating. You turn around in a circle trying to find any suspicious people, yet you only found yourself alone in the street which unsettled you even more.

A sudden rustling causes you to whip your head to the right. Your eyes immediately lock onto a bright pair of golden ones that look at you from the tree line. Neither one of you refused to blink or look away, seeing who would back down first.

Your eyes widen when the other set of eyes seem to just dissipate into thin air. After a few moments of trying to process what the hell just happened, you shake your head.

I must be going insane. You thought. When you turned around to continue home, your gaze caught sight of something on the sidewalk. On the sidewalk was what looked like gold flecks of dust hovering in front of you. Being the completely logical person you were, you tried to kick the dust away from you. However doing so only caused more gold flecks to appear and soon a trail of them started to manifest that led into the forest where you saw the pair of eyes. You looked at the trail bewildered. What the actual fuck is going on? You drop your head and let out a defeated sigh.

“Yeah, I'm over this.” You mumble out loud. You walk through the trail dead set on going home and sleeping for the entire day tomorrow. Now you weren't going to lie, yes you do get upset whenever one of your patients pass away, but normally not this upset because that was part of your job; it's bound to happen. But Miss Bradford’s death seemed to be taking a bigger toll on you than you thought.

However, as you tried to walk through the trail it forcefully turned your body to walk to the forest. Your eyes widen as your adrenaline spikes and your fight or flight kicks in as you start thrashing around, trying to release its invisible hold on you.

“Hey, wait! Stop!” You cry out. You whip your head in all directions, trying to look for someone to help you. “Help! Anyone, please!” Yet all you received was silence from the empty street. While the gold dust continued to push you toward, you still tried to fight against it though you quickly began to falter thanks to the mentally and physically taxing day you just went through.

As if it had sense you were giving up, the trail abruptly stopped pushing you. For a split second you thought about running off again but decided against it. You watched as the trail formed and led even deeper into the forest where the bushes and trees were so thick that not even the bright moon that was above could illuminate it. Your eyes flicker down to the trail before going back to the forest then back down to the trail. You grimace at the trail as if you were saying “do I really have to?” to it.

All of a sudden, your head whips up to the tree line as you hear music softly playing from it. From your limited musical knowledge, it sounded like it was a harp or some type of string instrument. You feel your muscles relax and your heart slows its frantic pace as the soft melody coursed around you, like a warm comforting blanket that had just come out of the dryer, and a sense of peace had washed over you.

The logical side of your brain was screaming at you to not listen to it. To not be a dumbass and see where it was coming from. To run away as fast as you could while screaming for help, yet you already knew that wasn't going to work. But the hypnotic song that the harp-like instrument was playing kicked that side of your brain to the curb as it lured you into the forest.

Your feet moved before you even realized it and soon you began to bush limbs away. After a few minutes of trying to follow where the music was coming from, it started to get louder and then light filtered through the trees. You quickened your pace and pushed away the last of the trees, but froze in your place as the music suddenly stopped and at what you walked upon.

In front of you was nothing but a vast and endless bright blue sky. From above where the sun continued to glow brightly but seemed to be twice the size of what it was before, to below you where you could see a single hint of land anywhere. Clouds rolled by thanks to the gentle breeze that blew past you and tall pillars were littered throughout the area, some were even floating!

You turn back to the forest behind you with a confused expression before looking back at the open sky. Wasn't it just night before? And why is this… oddly familiar? Where have I seen this before? You wondered.

You jumped nearly ten feet in the air when you heard a noise at your feet. You look down to see individual slabs of concrete form a bridge several feet out in front of you and the gold trail resumes onto the bridge.

You stare at the bridge processing what just occurred. You could practically hear the Jeopardy theme song playing in the background. You sharply inhale and your eyes widen when finally realized why this was all familiar.

Motherfucking Genshin Impact! I thought I recognized this loading screen!

You place a hesitant foot on the bridge, expecting it to crumble but it stood sturdy. You take another step, then another, and after four steps the bridge begins to form out again. You keep walking as the bridge does so. You do this for a few moments, giggling to yourself about what is actually transpiring.

“I really have gone insane.” You laughed. “Ah, and my future was so promising.”

A loud boom from below cuts you off from your self deprecating thoughts. What the hell? You get down on your knees and crawl over the edge of the bridge to see a huge black rip in the sky.

“Outlanders,” A voice boomed out. “your journey ends here.”

And out stepped the Unknown God.

Oh shit. You gasp quietly as your heart rate accelerates at the sight of her. She's hotter in person. You looked around for the twins and quickly spotted them on a platform just below the Unknown God.

“Who’re you?” The queen herself, Lumine, calls out.

“The sustainer of heavenly principles.” The Unknown God summons a black cube in her hand. “The arrogation of mankind ends here.” She then creates a cube below the twins, forcing them to jump out of the way. They spin in the air and summon their, much cooler than the ones in the game, wind gliders with swords in hand.

The Unknown God sends multiple horrifying trails of cubes after the twins, forcing them to fly and twirl out of the way of them while causing the whole sky to rumble somehow. Soon the twins fly towards the Unknown God and collide with her creating a huge explosion.

The explosion caused the bridge you were on to shake due to the force. You grabbed on tighter to the ledge in hopes of keeping your balance, but an aftershock made you slip off from the edge. You let out a terrified scream as you suddenly began to fall.

Your scream caught the trio's attention and made them look at you. The twin’s faces morph into a shocked and horrified expression as you fall while the Unknown God’s eyes narrow in recognition. “There you are.” And sent cubes after you, yet you are completely immune to what's happening around you thanks to the wind that was blowing in your ears.

Lumine quickly yelled to her brother. “Aether, catch her!” She diverted her attention back to the god. “I'll take care of this!”

Aether jumped into action and quickly flew to you. He willed his wind gliders to move faster than the cubes and was soon on you. He then flies underneath you and catches you bridal style. You let out a loud “oof” as you roughly collided with something and opened your eyes, which had subconsciously closed when you fell, to see Aether flying away with you in his arms and away from the cubes.

Aether looks down to your wind blown form. “Are you okay?” He asks gently. How you could hear him over the wind, you didn't know, but you could only stare at him in shock, not actually believing that he was real.

Taking in your silence as being in shock from the fall, he flies higher in the air and turns to the Unknown God to see his twin getting sucked into the god’s cubes.

“Lumine!” He cried out. He looked between you and his sister before ultimately throwing you over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes while keeping a firm hold on your thighs. He zooms to the god at high speeds which catches you off guard.

“What the fuck?!” You screech. You were starting to get a little motion sickness from all of the sudden movements.

Aether dips behind the god and swings his sword at her which causes an even larger explosion than before. You let out a scream at the loud sound. You could feel Aether’s chest rising and falling rapidly under your legs due to him panting. You hear him gasp and you turn over his head to see what was happening, though you already knew.

However, the sight of the smoke from the explosion coming back and encasing Aether’s hand was more terrifying in real life than it was in the game.

“Hold on!” He orders then quickly readjusted you so that he had a hold of your waist. You wrap your arms around his shoulders and cover your face in his shoulder, bracing for any sort of pain. Soon your vision started to turn black, but before it covered it entirely you heard Aether scream out to the Unknown God.

“Wait, don't go! Give my sister back!”

—

A/N: Kazuha is now officially the ninth member of the harem. Also, y'all... Inazuma? Lord help me I want to add Gorou and Thoma to the harem as well.

Side note, for all of the male characters that have a "young adult" physique like Aether, Kazuha, Xiao, etc. they're taller than they are in the game, from 5'6"-5'8" (Xiao still being the shortest) while those with an "adult" are anywhere from 5'10-6'2", because I said so lol.

[clarythericebot]

“Say No to This” has 2 different stories

This is probably due to my perception (both metaphorically because it’s been years since I first watched Hamilton and also literally because now I’m watching a clearer version) but this time around, I perceived Maria differently. 

 Before, she seemed more liked a device--she served to make me mad at Hamilton. And believe me, I was mad. (He cheated on Eliza!)  

That’s really all the relevance I gave Miss Maria Reynolds. I think I low-key believed the set-up idea - she and her husband planned all this so they can profit off of Alexander - but either way I didn’t give much thought to it.

But look at her.

This is her movement at the line I’m so sorry to bother you at home. 

I’d registered that line as seductive. Listening to the soundtrack, I’d reimagined her putting her hand to her chest, or looking forlorn, or something. But what does she do in the actual play? This juvenile little bop, like, It’s not really a big deal that I’m bothering you at home, right? It reminds me of a mischievous kid trying to get out of trouble.

This is mind, when she actually asks for help (My husband’s doing me wrong--beating me, cheating me, mistreating me) it registers as shameful and embarrassing. As if she were a fiercely independent latchkey kid ashamed at not being able to get out of this one by herself. 

Her act of seduction is portrayed like this by Hamilton: I said, “Well I should head back home” / She turned red / she led me to her bed / let her legs spread / and said “Stay...”

When I was listening to the soundtrack, I was picturing, well, exactly that. What was Maria actually doing in the musical?

1) She gazes up at her house, not looking at Alexander at all.

2) Exactly when he says he should probably head back home, she stiffens, and her hands slowly starts to clench around her skirts,

3) She whirls around suddenly and desperately, and begs, “Stay!”

Do you know what that looks like? A person, a young person, who’s been abused and alone, and who’s latched on to the first semi-trustworthy authority figure she spots. He helped her, didn’t he? He actually did, and no one’s helped her in such a long time. And he was so nice, offering to walk her home like that. But now he’s leaving, and what if her husband comes back? What if she’s all alone again? 

So she asks him to stay.

And she convinces him, it looks like, with the only way she knows how.

Notice her blocking during Hamilton’s internal monologue as he prays for the strength to not break his marriage vows to his wonderful wife and extols how helpless and hot Maria looks. She approaches him purposefully, and then a tad nervously (it looks like she swallows for a second), looks at his lips, edges closer, and then turns away at the last minute. 

I remembered this blocking, actually. Vaguely. I remembered it as seductive, an attempt to lure Hamilton in and delay gratification, leave him wanting more, as she sings her quintessential waoaoaoh. 

What it actually looks like? Her working up the courage to seduce Alexander (to get him to stay) and then backing out at the last minute. She moves away, looks out onto the street, and makes a decision. (Who would you rather contend with, Maria? The nice man who lent you thirty dollars or the husband that beat you?)

Look at that resolute tilt of her chin. She makes a decision.

The next face she takes on shows what decision she’s made:

She strides to him, all purpose now, and kisses him determinedly. 

Her expression right after it’s over?

It looks more than being startled by Alexander letting go of her so quickly. Does this look like a woman who wants to seduce? Honestly, it seems more like a young person who had been relying on Alexander to say no. Who had been hoping for the authority figure to have helped her because he was kind, and not because she could seduce him. She was disappointed.

(Another observation during this sequence: Alexander’s Lord, show me how to say no to this begins when Maria is walking towards him aggravatingly slowly. It begins again when Maria backs out of the kiss, walks away from him, and looks out onto the street, and then it becomes in my mind I’m trying to go [go go go]. Aside from her actions, we really don’t have insight to what her thoughts are, but here’s a thought experiment: What if she’s thinking the exact same thing?

Lord, show me how to say no to this. I don’t know how to say no to this.)

This characterization that I missed the first time around - that she really is younger and less experienced than him - marks how insidious Hamilton’s adultery really was beyond the surface. He doesn’t just cheat on Eliza--he fetishizes Maria. He infantalizes and and sexualizes her at once. (My God, she looks so helpless. And her body’s saying hell yes.) 

Now that I’m paying attention, it’s not even just her blocking. It comes out in the lyrics, too. The whole time, she’s addressing him as sir. No other woman in the play addresses Alexander like this. Yes, it’s kinky - we hear it’s kinky because we’re in Alexander’s perspective. Take that lens away and what we actually hear is a young woman addressing an authority figure.

What the hell, Alexander.

“I don’t know about any letter!”

I had forgotten that she screams this line, not sings it.

Look at Alexander’s reply and what he’s reinforcing here. Look at their priorities. 

It’s obvious that Alexander’s being selfish. He’s thinking about himself, his reputation, how he’s ruined. And Maria’s concern?

Please don’t leave me.

It still comes down to that. She doesn’t want to be alone. She doesn’t want to be left to fend for herself from her brute of a husband. The man of honor who’d helped her is yelling now, and threatening to leave, but Maria has one more trick up her sleeve, and it’s not even a surprise. It’s the only trick up her sleeve she’s got. It’s the only way she can get men around her to treat her with even a smidgen of dignity. 

This also adds another layer to Hamilton. Unlike pretty much every other song, this one doesn’t quite line up with the narrator’s version of events. One could claim that the lyrics and the actions onstage don’t exactly match because that’s how it works--I mean, it’s not as if they could’ve shown the entire affair onstage. I might agree (and I do agree in part--I’m sure some of it is symbolism due to the medium), except all the other songs move in tandem with onstage events. In Alexander Hamilton, we hear moved in with a cousin / the cousin committed suicide and then we literally see the cousin hang himself, as well as Hamilton’s emotional reaction. Even more glaring, we hear Eliza’s then you look back at me and see Alexander glance at her. We listen to Angelica’s the conversation lasted two minutes, maybe three minutes and are witness to the important parts of that conversation.

Say No to This is different, and perhaps one of the reasons I didn’t catch what was happening was because there are two similar-looking, but but ultimately disparate stories. We hear about a temptress trying to trick Alexander out of money. We are shown a girl giving an authority figure what he wants so that he would help her.

Maria doesn’t get to frame her narrative--we already know that from the soundtrack. What we don’t realize is how much of the narrative we hear is falsified, skewed by Alexander’s perception. What we don’t see is a young woman doing what it takes to survive, someone not unlike Alexander himself. We don’t see that because Alexander doesn’t bring himself to try.

If there’s one thing we learn from the musical, it’s that we don’t get to control who tells our story. Maria Reynolds, who gets almost no voice, knows and exemplifies this most of all.

[dangerously-human]

4, 20, 21, 22, 25 :)

I will confess that responding to your ask took the longest, because you asked the WONDERFUL question that involved combing through a bunch of my own writing to find something I liked and wanted to talk about, which was quite fun but anyway, that's why this response is kinda late!

4. Share a sentence or paragraph from your writing that you’re really proud of (explain why, if you like)

This is a snippet from the Sparky imprint fic. I'm fond of it because everyone feels in character, even Sheppard, who is turning out to be difficult to write dialogue for:

The minutes feel interminable - and really, she should be accustomed by now to the time dilation that seems to occur whenever she’s worrying over Colonel Sheppard - but in reality, probably fewer than five minutes actually pass before he starts to stir. Elizabeth lets out a long, unsteady breath. To her surprise, when John’s eyes flicker open, his pupils focus with no problem - so it’s possible he’s not even concussed.

“Hey,” she says softly. “Nice to have you back with us.”

His forehead furrows in confusion. “I distinctly remember being upright before,” he says. “How long ago did I decide to take a little nap?”

Rodney’s gaze flicks to Elizabeth like he’s seeking permission to make a joke, but at the unguarded ferocity in her expression, he clearly thinks better of it. “You haven’t been out that long, maybe five minutes,” he explains. “You managed to catch the device before it hit the floor, and then - and then you hit the floor instead,” he finishes lamely.

John winces. “Any idea what that thing does? Other than knock me on my ass, I mean.”

20. Tell us the meta about your writing that you really want to ramble to people about (symbolism you’ve included, character or relationship development that you love, hidden references, callbacks or clues for future scenes?)

This question makes me wish I was the kind of writer who included such Easter eggs. Um, well, I always write Endeavour fic with nods to my firm headcanon that Morse has ADHD, even when it isn't totally relevant to the story at hand. In writing his and Joan's daughters for later chapters of A Shifting Cadence, I've been determined to get across that at least their youngest, Zoe, also has ADHD, and while I'm not sure that I'll be able to work it in, I've spent a LOT of time working on squeezing in a bit about her getting diagnosed and Joan raising an eyebrow at Morse when she hears what this ADD (as it would have been in the 80s) business is all about.

21. What other medium do you think your story would work well as? (film, webcomic, animated series?)

I sometimes have an idea that makes me really wish I could draw or paint, because it's more of a visual than a story, but I don't have that particular skill at this point. I'm not sure that any of the stories I actually end up telling would work in another medium, though. Maybe one day I'll write more fic poetry, that was a really fun challenge with Love, to You, Is last year.

22. Do you reread your old works? How do you feel about them?

Some of them! I feel like I end up rereading Just Once and Still Here every couple months, partly because they're some of my faves and partly because there just isn't a lot of Continuum fic to begin with. I still like most of my more recent writing, although some of it makes me cringe a little (I very rarely reread A Thousand Reasons, for example, because it's hard not to focus on everything I'd do differently if I wrote it now); my older stuff is from so many years ago that even what would probably count as embarrassing feels like the product of passion from a younger self, so I can excuse it, ya know?

25. What part of writing is the most fun?

Answered here

[starchildsteven]

My Steven Universe buds, guess who used concrete, as is, stated in the canon of the show, information to figure out what year Steven was born?

...by which I mean the 2 most reasonable possibilities. (Which also means I figured out when Connie was born... or again the 2 most reasonable possibilities.)

Tl;dr: It’s 1999 or 2000.

Get comfortable... It’s a lot.

So first off Channel Frederator's timeline is close, if not right on the money, based on my own calculations. With that said I am going to lay out why I agree that Steven was born in 2000.

To get Steven's birth year though we actually have to center the timeline around Greg with key information regarding Sour Cream, Buck Dewey and the Dondai.

As stated in "Steven's Birthday" by Greg himself he was 22 when he met Rose and the Gems. He had playing music gigs and was recording his album for about 2-4 years before this since he also said he dropped out of community college to pursue a music career and moved out of his home around this time. Assuming that Greg was, like most people, 18 when he graduated and community college is 2 years that means he left home between 18 and 20. 

In "Gem Harvest" Greg says to Andy he left home “like 2 decades ago.” Let’s not split hairs and just say he left 20 years ago to make the math easier that puts Greg anywhere from 38 to 40. We can confirm the youngest possible age Greg could be when Steven was born (which is ridiculous but possible) would be 23 making Greg 37 which means he left home 19 years ago at most because again we know that he left home when he was at least 18. However that is NOT actually possible. Because Greg remember was 22 when he met the Gems and Sour Cream, who we know is significantly older than Steven, was born when Greg was around 23. Which means we need to add however many years older Sour Cream is than Steven to Greg’s age.

This is where Buck Dewey comes into play.

As stated in "Little Graduation" Buck is going to med school to become a doctor. This means he needs to have his bachelor's degree in Pre-med which takes 4 years to complete. Steven is 16 meaning the Cool Kids, Sour Cream included, are 22 for Buck to have completed 4 years of college after finishing high school since once again most teenagers graduate at 18. Sour Cream had to be 6 when Steven was born (5 if you want to say maybe they graduated at 17 and are 21). That adds 5 or 6 years to Greg’s 23 making him 28 or 29.

That means when Steven was 14, Greg was 42 or 43 when he told Andy he left like 2 decades ago. In this case the word like is being used to indicate estimation not an exact amount. Example: If I say I left work like 20 minutes ago I could mean any number close to 20. 18, 21, etc.) If he left at 18 it would be 24 or 25 years ago, if he left at 19 it would be 23 or 24 years ago, if he left at 20 it would be 22 or 23 years ago. While some of those are a stretch, 22 and 23 are both close enough to warrant being estimated to 2 decades ago.

I know what you are all thinking “Oh my God, StarChildSteven, why did you put so much thought into this? How many hours did you waste?” (The answer to that is... embarrassing.) But the other thing you are thinking is “How does Greg’s age get us to the year Steven was born.

This is where the Dondai comes in!

Ronaldo in the episode “Beach City Drift” calls it a '96 Supremo and cars are branded either after the year they are made or the following year. So the Dondai was first on sale and new in 1995 or 1996. We can infer through the evidence in the show, Greg was older than 18 but younger than 23 when the picture of him with the Dondai was taken. Greg's character design in the photo he shows to Connie and Steven is the same he has in “Story for Steven” before switching to plain shirts and stopped wearing his star shirt at the end of "Greg the babysitter" when he he starts working at the car wash. Again we can infer he doesn’t switch back to the star shirt after this as the implication is Greg somewhat gave up on his music career. At this time we already figured out he was 23. So the picture was taken when Greg was 23 or younger. Meaning the earliest it could be in “Greg the Babysitter” is 1995. Sour Cream is about a year old in this episode based on his limited speech and motor skills (he can’t walk or form words yet but can climb well) which means it is 4 or 5 years before Steven was born.

This makes our complete timeline: Greg meets the Gems at 22, Sour Cream is born when he is 23 in the year 1995, 4 or 5 years later Rose has Steven making Greg 28 or 29 and the year is either 1999 or 2000. Considering the show first aired in 2013 and Steven was 13 we can reasonably assume it is meant to be the current year within the show. That means the year Steven was most likely born is the year 2000!

*This next section is about Connie*

Now by extension this means we can also figure out when Connie was born based on her age relevant to Steven’s age as mentioned in “Steven’s Birthday.” In that episode Steven turn 14 to which Connie replies “I’m only 12 and 3/4!” Meaning Connie will be 13 in 3 months. (12 months in a year. 3/4 of 12 months is 9 months making Connie 12 years and 9 months. So in 3 months she will turn another year old.) A year after Steven’s birthday he would be 1 and the year would be either 2000 or 2001, 3 month later in November (because 3 months after August, Steven’s birth month, is November) Connie would be born in that same year. So Connie would be born in 2000 or 2001. Though as Steven as most likely born in 2000, Connie was most likely born in 2001.

As far as the SU x GF crossover: Dipper and Mabel turned 13 in 2012 the same year Steven turned either 12 or 13 meaning the twins they are anywhere from 16 days older than Steven to a year older and 16 days older than Steven. Just in case anyone was interested. I’m certainly not saying that the fans who like the crossover have to change their headcanons.

Preemptive rebuttals:

“But Steven doesn’t age like a normal human.” He doesn’t however Greg has obviously been keeping track of Steven’s age based on the passage of time not his son’s physical age or appearance. Steven didn’t look 13 yet he and Greg still celebrated his 13th birthday. It doesn’t matter if Steven doesn’t physically age, he could still be a baby but he would still have been alive for 13 years.

“We don’t know how old Greg was when he took the picture with the Dondai? For all we know he was 26!” While that IS possible it doesn’t line up with the design he has when he and Rose record the video for Steven or his design in “Three Gems and A Baby.” Remember Steven has to be born at least 5 years after Sour Cream who was conceived when Greg was 22. So at Steven’s birth Greg has to be at least 28. He has lost a significant amount of hair. While I will concede it’s possible he lost that much hair in a year it’s not likely. Greg is also wearing the star shirt in the photo with the car. He presumably stopped wearing the star shirt at 23 at the end of “Greg the Babysitter” as we see him no longer wearing it at the end of the episode when he now wears the car wash shirt and every design of him after that has him in either plain white or black shirts.

“Why do you care what year people think Steven is born? Can’t you let people have their headcanons?” Where did I say you have to take my word for this and couldn’t headcanon Steven born in a different year? Please point to the place where I said everyone must now take it as canon that Steven was born in either of the years I mentioned. Show me where I said this information negates all the opinions of other fans. Tell me where I even implied that people absolutely had to conform the conclusion I came to. If you can’t then shut up.

“Why would you waste so much time on this? It’s not that deep.” Because I enjoy doing stuff like this. I had fun doing this. This was an activity that brought me joy. Analyzing, theorizing and compiling fandom data is something that I like doing. It’s something I enjoy taking part in and sometimes I get excited to share the results of all my hard work with other people who might be interested or care. 

“What if the Crewniverse gives us a different year eventually?” Then I’m still taking this as canon. The same way I take Steven as 18 at the end of the series as canon because I always prefer in canon evidence over Word of God. To me Word of God only matters for things we can’t figure out by watching the show. One day when everyone who worked on the show is dead there will be no more Word of God, all that will be left is the text (in this case the show) so anything not in the show will become irrelevant. I chose to implement that even when creators are still alive. Obviously I will no longer claim it as definitive canon (though I am not doing that now) but I will accept it as an alternative interpretation so long as nothing in the text contradicts it. Word of God is not text.

[flych1]

Kehlani singer on her new album

Kehlani, singer on her new album

Photo: Pari Dukovic

Kehlani

In early March, Kehlani was due to meet his label. She was preparing to release her second album - her first since she had a baby and a return to her roots R-B. She was scheduled to perform the first part of Justin Bieber's Changes tour, as well as a number of dream solo dates. Atlantic executives told him they believed in the album, which was scheduled for release on April 24, its 25th anniversary, but the coronavirus pandemic made it impossible to develop a promotion plan. We'd have to postpone it. "I was casting actors and actresses. I was doing all kinds of things," she says of all the pre-production she had completed at the time of the mid-March meeting. We're talking about a video call from Zoom; Kehlani sits alone in a sunny room in his Los Angeles home. (Later, she will be joined by her dog, a pint of ice cream and a tequila-based drink with a slice of orange coming out). It just so happens that today is the original release date. They said, "We don't think you should take it out,"" she said. "And then I went to my room and made the 'Toxic' video on my laptop." She posted it on YouTube at the end of March. "People messed with it," she adds. When Kehlani's label accepted her request to release the album this month, it was stipulated that she had to do it all herself. "If all we do is make music and press the button, then you can do it," she says. "And I was like, 'Okay, challenge accepted fucking.'" So now Kehlani and her photographer, with whom she's in quarantine, are planning and editing music videos, photoshoots, and album coverage. (She also lives with her daughter, two younger siblings, a close friend and her assistant). His garage has been converted into a two-level studio, one side for music, the other for visuals. Kehlani has been a professional musician since the age of 13. A series of mixtapes - full of overshares about having a heart built and broken - and a random but successful debut album have already made her a leading figure in the industry. His music is R-B in its purest form: songs about how love defeats you, about floating on the pure adrenaline of a crush, about the desire of someone you can't trust in your heart. It's no coincidence that when white artists like Bieber and Charlie Puth want to look into an R-B sound, they call on Kehlani to help them. The new album, It Was Good Until It Wasn't, is part of a revival of the genre in the midst of its fiercest debates. It is also a transition disc, a bridge between adolescence and adulthood. Throughout her career, Kehlani has been considered the daughter of the R-B: sexy but boyish. In her old music, she played with both sides of the binary. On the new record, it got too big. She did so immediately after giving birth to her daughter Adeya, who is now one year old. (She is currently co-parenting with her ex, Adeya's father, Javaughn Young-White, younger brother of Jaboukie from the Daily Show). "People would always be like, Kehlani is adorable or, like, Kehlani is cool hella. But then I had a baby and it made me look more feminine," she says. "So I guess I thought, OK, I'm going to start shaking my ass and talk about it." (She wanted Bieber to do a song for her album, but he refused. "Because he's a super-married guy now, it didn't really fit," she said. Kehlani's self-managed music video for "Toxic", filmed with the only camera on her MacBook, shows the nervous figure of the singer slipping and squirming, rubbing her arms and hips. "Don Julio has ridiculed me for you," she tells her former lover that she won't reach out to him, even if her body urges her to do it out of instinct. Kehlani insists this is not his last relationship, which ended publicly and painfully, with Compton rapper YG earlier this year. It's the kind of personal drama that made headlines and made Kehlani's blog famous. She writes songs that address all of this openly. Her fans grow up with her career because she is transparent, sometimes to excess. Or, as she says, I do in public, and it makes people feel like I'm not a stranger. I'm a person with a human ass. I'm screwing up in front of the whole world." The conversation about the state of the R-B was revived last November, when Lizzo, often considered a pop artist, won album of the year at the Soul Train Awards, beating soul singer Ari Lennox. ("It's clear that I'm not cool enough," Lennox tweeted after his loss. Last February, rapper Young M.A. went further, saying that "we barely have R-B". Indeed, in recent years, the superstars of the genre - like SWV, Boyz II Men, Ginuwine, Toni Braxton - and their musical descendants have mostly failed to stop the charts as they did two decades ago; many contemporary black musicians evade the label, preferring to be called "alternative R-B", while others experiment more with genres that were once declared out of bounds by the guardians. Kehlani, on the other hand, is part of a coterie of artists who maintain the relevant R-B today, alongside newcomers like Summer Walker, Bryson Tiller and Lennox. She has a song for every step of a relationship: going under it, going over it, watching the door ahead, a personal promise to stop texting her. His music seems new - not as a consistent copy of a Brandy song - but the influence is palpable. She finds the current debate about gender - what the R-B is, what it was and where it has gone - boring. It may no longer sound like it did in the 90s, but rappers (think, more recently, Drake) have expanded it beyond the desperate desire (or desperate loves) of the last century. "I think people don't know enough about music to make these kinds of accusations [that the R-B no longer exists]. The R-B is simple lyrics and a great song. Lots of harmonies and batteries and melodic production," she says, as if it were easy. "I'll never be able to make 90s R-B music. I'm never going to be able to make R-B music from the early 2000s, because that's not when I was making music. It wasn't when I experienced things that shaped my words and my sound." Kehlani was born in Oakland and raised by her aunt. His mother struggled with drug addiction, and his father died when he was 24 years old and she was very young. A stint on America's Got Talent put her in touch with Nick Cannon, who paid for her to spend time in the studio to make her first mixtape in 2014. On Cloud 19, you can hear the beginnings of a great talent: his voice is more acute and younger, but it is overflowing with emotion. On the deck of Cloud 19's "As I Am" film, she sings and succeeds in the chorus of a Mary J. Blige classic. A week after the release of her second mixtape in 2015, she signed with Atlantic Records. Kehlani turned to pop with his debut album of 2017, SweetSexySavage, an album full of rushed and half-finished ideas. It was carried out amid a personal mental health crisis, sparked by rumors that she cheated on her ex-boyfriend, NBA player Kyrie Irving, in 2016. The relentless online bullying led her to attempt suicide. (Kyrie Irving later admitted that she had never been unfaithful.) "I started an album as a person and experienced the most traumatic event of my life," she says. Her label held on until the deadline, letting her make an album from songs she barely recognized. "I had no connection with the music," she says. "I was embarrassed about everything." The new record is a reset, closer to the Grammy-nominated mixtapes that made it famous. It Was Good Until It Wasn't Gives you the Pure B-R rush, the R-B "waiting for you to call me", the R-B "the only thing that interests me is you": the hits of Brandy and Monica in the 90s, the classics of Alicia Keys of the early 2000s who fall in love. She is also less affected by the nostalgia of adolescence than by the immediacy of adult desires. His first mixtapes were about childhood and adolescence; It Was Good Until It Wasn't at peace with the way most conflicts or heartaches unfold. The title comes from a conversation with a friend about her recent breakup. That's the life of this, you know? she said. The is good and then it's not good anymore. Although she has been in the industry since she was a teenager, Kehlani has never had any decisive success for her career, and it is unlikely that the new album will deliver one. "F-MU" is hot and dancing, and the collaboration with Canadian R-B star Tory Lanez, "Can I," is a sexy earworm - although neither song seems particularly suited to virality. His greatest successes are gossip blogs that overshadow his music. His three-month relationship with YG ended just after they released a song together proclaiming their love. (Their duet came out on the eve of Valentine's Day 2020; three days later, she released a breakup song after images of him cheating her surfaced). Minutes before one of our calls, Kehlani posted a series of tweets about a feud with another Oakland native, rapper Kamaiyah, who slammed her on Instagram Live about a previously unreleased mixtape and accused her of being a colorist, among other things. "She gave the green light to my family and me and told everyone in Oakland to kill us for a song," Kehlani says. (Kamaiyah later replied, telling Kehlani, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't threaten you," but added that "a green light means going like a fight, not shooting"). A moment after our discussion, she answered a phone call from a friend and nervously asked if her tweets - which had let the rapper know there was no bad blood - were correct, if she had handled the situation properly. Kehlani and Kamaiyah had long argued over a joint mixtape, which was to be released before the release of their two albums. Her production was difficult, and even the basic decisions - how many songs she should have, what it should be called, what the visual aesthetic should be - met, according to Kehlani, with Kamaiyah's resistance. In the end, she had had enough of back and forth, and the mixtape didn't seem as essential to her as the release of her album. When she came back to our call, her mood was appalled. I tried to contact her to do good business and she said, "If the project doesn't come out, you can't have it [one piece]," she says. "Even though I wrote it." Once again, she was swept away in a drama she couldn't control, tweeting clarifications about a quarrel she didn't care about, instead of celebrating the upcoming release of her album. But why challenge a misinterpretation if she is tired of getting carried away by the drama? How can I put this to rest and out of my body? Because I don't want to wear them," Kehlani says. "Even if you never want to piss me off again, how can I make sure you know it's love on this side?" she tweeted Kamaiyah to let the rapper know she wished him the best. She is satisfied with the way she has defused an unexpected quarrel. A few years ago, it would not have been as weighted. It took a lot of to get to this point, she says. The death of two friends in three months has put a lot of things in perspective. Philadelphia rapper Chynna overdosed in April at age 25; Minnesota rapper Lexii Alijai, whom Kehlani considered "a little sister," overdosed on New Year's Day at just 21 years of age. Lexii Alijai was scheduled to perform the first part of the post-Bieber tour as the headliner. "I couldn't believe it because Alijai was so young," she says. "It was a click, it was amazing, it was sad and it was heartbreaking. I'm always trying to find the best way to help them continue their legacy." Being 25 was also more than a quarter of a life. It was a horizon she never thought she would see. "I've always had a strange feeling about being 25 or older," she says. "It's a shock because I'm now older than my father was." that's part of what made It Was Good Until It Wasn't feel like the album she finally grew up on. "I wanted to be 25 on this one," she says.

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[winryofresembool]

Edwin one-shot: Starry Night

A/N: Merry (belated) Christmas, @theothardus, and sorry about the lateness! I am your Secret Santa! You mentioned you liked Edwin and Christmas and fluff, so I sort of combined all those things. Since I’m trying to keep this fic as canon ‘verse as possible, I made up another (very Christmas like) holiday, called the Starry Night. The name comes from the game Harvest Moon Sunshine Island, and it was suggested to me by the lovely @criis55 who has had to listen to me rant about this fic a LOT (sorry about that)! I hope you’ll enjoy :3 (and don’t forget to leave ‘em comments!)

@fullmetalsecretsanta

Words: 2277

Relationship: Edwin 

genre: fluff

warnings: none

The traditional Winter Solstice holiday, often called the Starry Night by the inhabitants of Amestris, was drawing near. Even the small town of Resembool was bubbling of excitement as everyone was preparing to spend time with their loved ones, buying a presents and tons of food, and decorating their homes. Some people were even competing on who managed to put the most dazzling lights on their yards, annoying their neighbors.

One of the annoyed people was Edward Elric, who had never been a huge fan of Starry Night. When asked why he didn’t like the holiday, he claimed it had become way too commercial, making people forget what the day was really about: spending time with their families and friends. Those who knew Ed better, though, suspected that his dislike for Starry Night stemmed from his childhood; since his mother died and father left, he and Al had always spent the day alone, studying ways to bring their mother back instead of joining the girl and her grandmother in the yellow house near them. Every year Winry asked, yet they didn’t appear until over 10 years later, when they had finally finished their journey to get their bodies back.

This time the reason for Ed’s annoyance was a gift he was supposed to purchase. Earlier that day, Pinako, Winry and the Elric brothers had decided that this year each would get only one present. Al had suggested they write their names on a piece of paper, put them into a hat and draw someone else’s name from it, buying the gift for the person whose name they got. Ed had ended up getting Winry’s name, but something about Al’s demeanor when he saw Ed’s reaction to his gift recipient told him that the younger Elric might have planned it from the beginning. He didn’t have any proof of it, though.

Lately, Al had been hinting often that Ed should finally make his first move, claiming he totally knew what was going on between his big brother and their childhood friend, but Ed had tried to ignore the comments. If Ed was honest, it wasn’t that he didn’t know that his feelings towards his automail mechanic weren’t quite brotherly, but it was different to know it than to act on it. What if Winry didn’t answer to his feelings? What if he’d embarrass himself in front of her? What if he ruined their friendship? He wasn’t ready to take that risk especially since Winry hadn’t been sending him any signals of being interested in him… Or that’s what Ed thought, at least, because he could be quite oblivious when it came to other people’s feelings. Had he paid more attention, he might have noticed how wrong he was.

Now, the biggest question was: what should he give Winry? First, he had tried asking her if there was anything she needed from the town as he’d be going there to do some shopping, but she had simply stared at him with confusion, telling him new screws would be great. They weren’t an appropriate present in Ed’s opinion (she did deserve something better, after all), so as he made his way to the town, he still no idea what to buy. Usually, he would have asked Al to come with him, but his pride had won. That pride couldn’t accept that Al would probably pick something Winry would prefer over his present. Besides, he knew Al wouldn’t stop throwing sly remarks about his possible feelings for Winry, so for the sake of his mental health, he decided to go alone.

Ed hadn’t picked the best day to go shopping because unfortunately, everyone else was doing their last-minute Starry Night preparations as well. The shops were crowded and played holiday music loudly from their speakers, making his head ache. Not just that, nothing he saw seemed inspiring enough.

He could have gotten her a piece of clothing; she seemed to love the hoodie he had been wearing on Al and his return day, but he didn’t know her size and was nervous he would accidentally pick something she wouldn’t like. He was aware that their tastes were very different, after all. She liked cute things, he liked skulls and dragons. He fully gave up in the idea when the salesman at the clothes store heard he wanted to get something for a girl and suggested he get her underwear because what girl wouldn’t like that? Ed wasn’t an idiot, he knew Winry would throw a wrench at him faster than he could say “alchemy” if he did that. Besides, Ed found that particular department slightly intimidating, and the last thing he needed in the middle of a busy town was the idea of Winry in only those pieces… And so he ended up leaving the store rather quickly.

He also considered giving Winry something practical. She would probably appreciate a bucket of wrenches? That was better than screws, right? Winry always lost the old ones carrying them all around the house, so it would probably be useful? But then again, he didn’t enjoy the idea of Winry throwing those same wrenches at him, so he should probably get something that didn’t hurt so much if he ended up annoying her again. Which he probably would. The screwdrivers didn’t feel like a lot safer option. Books were useful, but if he was honest, he didn’t really know which mechanics books Winry already had and which she considered relevant to her interests, so he should have figured that out first. And with the Starry Night already happening in a few days, he didn’t have time for that.

Next up were the food stalls, and Ed stopped there for a good moment. Food was something they both enjoyed, but Ed could hear Al’s voice in his head saying that he should get Winry something more personal. Chocolate would be too lame, even though Ed didn’t understand why anyone would refuse a good chocolate bar. Apple pie was out of the question too, since Granny had already promised to bake one, and it would be weird if he baked one too.

Once Ed had walked past the stalls, he was ready to give up. Just when he was about to leave the market place, someone yelled after him: “Oi! I know that expression! You look like someone who hasn’t found the right gift for a loved one. I think I can help you.”

“Can you, really?” Ed asked sarcastically but decided to follow the man into his shop either way.

The man owned a jewelry store, selling products expensive enough to make Ed’s antenna twitch even though he did have a good amount of money in his pocket from his state alchemist days. At first he was certain he would not buy anything from there, but then the store owner asked: “who are you planning to get this present for?”

“A… friend…” Ed answered with hesitation, not really knowing how to describe Winry and his relationship. Truthfully, it was much more complicated than “just friends”, but this stranger didn’t need to know that. Ed decided to add: “… who’s also my automail mechanic.”

“A guy?” the man asked, assuming a mechanic must have been a man. “I’m sure we’ll have something for gu…” “No, no, not a guy!” Ed got angry. “She’s a she and she’s the goddamn best automail mechanic in this country, so don’t you go assuming…!”

“OK, calm down! I got your point,” the man tried to reassure the angry young man. “A mechanic, you say? Someone donated this a little while ago.” He pointed at something by the shop window. “Do you think she’d like it?”

Ed found himself staring at a small silver locket that had a wrench engraved on it, and in the middle of it there was one tiny stone; an aquamarine resembling the color of Winry’s eyes.

“I could see that…” Ed said, surprised he had managed to find something so fitting. “Is that expensive?”

“Funny you should ask… Normally, I would put a very high price on this because it’s 100 per cent silver, but its old owner told me that if this locket would make its new owner happy, that’s all she’d ask for. So, to listen to her wish, I’m gonna give it for a very reasonable price if you give it a good home.”

“Really? How much is it?” Ed asked, now genuinely curious.

The man told him the price, and Ed decided it was worth it. He was also told he could put something into the locket for an extra value, and suddenly an idea started to form in his head.

…

It was finally the Starry Night, and after a good dinner, the gifts were exchanged in the Rockbell-Elric household. Pinako opened hers first, and not surprisingly, it was a bottle of whiskey (how had Winry gotten that, Ed wanted to know, since people weren’t buy stronger alcohol drinks in Amestris until they were 21. And she wasn’t even 17 yet!) and a new pack of cards for her games as the old ones started to get rather worn. Al’s gift was a living being; Pinako had gotten him a kitten from the litter of neighbor’s cat, and Ed eyed it suspiciously for moment, before finally accepting that maybe it was time for Al to get one. As long as he’d take good care of it! Even the old Den had accepted the cat so there was nothing he could do to deny this from his brother. Ed himself had gotten an “ugly” sweater from Al, with skulls, and to Ed’s horror, hearts (the cute looking, not realistic), on it. He still put it on, smirking widely, before it was time for Winry to open her present.

Ed’s smirk turned into a nervous one as she started ripping the gift wrap from the package. He had decided to play a little prank on her, putting the small locket box into a big box under a lot of newspaper, but as he watched her reactions, he started to regret it. She looked quite upset when it started seeming like there was no present at all in the box, but finally she found what she was looking for.

“What’s this?” she stared at the present a bit nervously before opening it. Her breath got caught in her throat when she saw the locket Ed had bought from the jewelry shop.

“Wow, this is not what I was expecting…” she finally said, her eyes shining with the locket. “Ed, it’s really pretty!”

“I’m glad you like it, but it isn’t the only thing I got for you… Open that locket.” Ed poked his finger at the little lock the gift had.

After admiring the silver wrench on the locket for a while, she opened it and found…

“My earrings!!! I thought you had lost them because you never gave them back to me! And… and… a picture of us! Aww, look at how small we were… I think this was before your mother… And did you carve this text yourself?” She noticed the “thank you” carved into the metal that reminded her of Ed’s state alchemist watch. A wide smile rose on her face as she took the gift in.

“I did.” Ed rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. “I feel we haven’t properly thanked you for everything you’ve for us… So this is for that. Also, there’s one more thing… Look behind the photo.”

Winry took the photo from its place and noticed there was a tiny letter behind it. She moved closer to the fire to read it, not noticing that Ed was blushing next to her.

“Winry,

Thank you for always being there for us, even though that must have been hard sometimes. I know I can be one hell of a brick when I get to that mood. So sorry about that.

Thanks for getting me back to my feet when it was nearly impossible. I don’t know where I’d be without your automail. Not here, for sure.

Thanks for giving us a reason to come back home. For being an amazing friend, and more… I guess we should finally talk about that topic soon. That’s what Al keeps saying to me.

I hope this locket reminds you that you are our, my favorite gearhead, now and always.”

There were tears in Winry’s eyes when she stopped reading, and Ed nearly started panicking:

“Wow, please don’t cry! Tell me those are tears of joy instead of… the others?”

“Yes, stupid, they are tears of joy. Come here.”

Winry extended her arms to hug Ed who had sat down next to her and whispered into his ear.

“That was the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me… thank you so much… this is an amazing present… I don’t know what to say…” she laughed awkwardly and gave him a quick kiss on his cheek. Ed helped her to put the locket around her neck and the earrings in her ears.

“It looks nice,” he said, and she simply nodded. They didn’t even notice the other two snickering at their actions.

Once she finally calmed down enough to think straight, she added quietly: “Oh, and about that thing we need to talk about… Join me here once the others have gone to bed.”

Ed felt nervous for a moment, not knowing what to expect from that conversation, but then Winry squeezed his hand and gave him a smile that reassured him. He had a feeling this was shaping up to be the best Starry Night he had ever had.

[makomaragi]

left over thing from femslash february. it’s long and dumb but idk.  a prequel to another fic I wrote last year. i’m just kind of over tweaking this lol 

prompt: jewelry

pairing: juniper/fennel (scientificshipping), but burnet/kukui are there for a little bit

rating: um pg they talk about sex for a second

fandom: pokemon

Research never seemed to take her to Alola as often as it did other regions, and after having been there for nearly a month, she wasn’t sure why. The region was teaming with all sorts of relevant topics, the time she had spent there not feeling like enough. Professor Juniper had gone to help excavate a new tar pit that was found near the sea, hoping that what they might find would help her with some theories that linked to other fossil Pokemon in other regions. She had heard for years now that Alola was a heartland for fossils – found so often that they were being sold in shops to trainers. Her own theory was that it had to do with the volcanoes and how the island itself developed millions of years ago, collecting samples of the dirt, rocks and fossils to take back home and test.

Packing up the camp site always left her feeling a bit nostalgic, having spent most of her childhood and teenage years backpacking with her father. She could probably untie and repack a tent with her eyes closed by this point, though, not everyone enjoyed the camping aspect of it as much as she did.

Most of the research team had left by that point, Professor Juniper and a few others lagging behind to tie up a few loose ends. She booked herself a hotel for the final few nights in Alola, giving her a chance to have a steady internet connection and a quiet place to get organized before returning to Unova. It worked out, and she was much obliged to meet her old friend Burnet and her husband for lunch in Konikoni City the next day.

She had kept herself holed up in her hotel room the entire time since checking in, seated at the desk that morning, reviewing her scribbled notes and attempting to make more sense out of them by typing them out on her laptop in a more final report. She still had hours to kill until lunch – too close to the time to eat, but plenty of time to do something else.

There was the lingering feeling of wanting to scope out the town. It would give her a chance to stretch her legs, hoping her body would adjust before the long flight home. She had been aching after sleeping in a tent for the past few weeks, but she had hoped taking a few days off from physical labor and sleeping in a proper bed would help ease it.

Bringing something back home for Fennel had crossed her mind several times. She tried her best to pick something up for her in her travels most of the time, but this time especially seemed to carry some weight. Fennel had been upset that she would be gone for nearly a month as it was and they hadn’t been able to speak much while she was gone. When they did speak, Fennel was her usual bubbly self, but the feigned distance and sadness in her voice couldn’t be ignored.

Several flyers and signs had caught her eye in the time she had been in town of a jewelry shop run by one of the Island Kahunas. She had known that Alola ran a different league system than many other regions, and wasn’t sure exactly what the Kahuna’s job was, but it was something to do with trainers. The professor felt a tad embarrassed not being as well versed in Alolan culture as she was elsewhere. She had met the Elite Four in other regions numerous times, some more than others, but felt she should at least know the names of those with the title in the region she was visiting, at least making an effort to introduce herself.

It was said that money couldn’t buy happiness, but higher end jewelry would at least put some sort of sparkle in Fennel’s eyes when she gave it to her.

The shop was small and rather quaint, Aurea not even sure it was open until she pulled on the wooden door handle. “Hi, there. I was told to come speak to Olivia?”

“You’re looking at her,” the younger woman looked up from her spot at the counter, raising an eyebrow. “I know you from somewhere.”

“Could be.”

“You’re a Pokemon professor, aren’t you?”

“Professor Juniper,” she held out her hand as a more formal greeting with the Kahuna.

“I’m Olivia. Island Kahuna and proud member of the Alola Elite Four,” shaking her hand before gesturing to the jewelry under the glass countertop. “So, what are you looking for today? Something for yourself, or a gift for someone?”

“A gift, I think.”

“For your wife, I’d assume.”

Aurea’s brow raised at this.

“You’re wearing a wedding ring and I don’t have anything in the way of men’s stuff. Besides, I know that you’re with that scientist chick,” the kahuna continued. “Any certain occasion? Let me guess. You’ve been away from home for a while, and want to get her a souvenir.”

“Something like that, I guess.” It was all extremely presumptuous of the girl, but she also supposed that she had an eye for these types of things when it came to her jewelry business. She was also sure that Kukui had something to do with all of her previous knowledge of her, somehow. Though being a Pokemon professor did technically make her a public figure. Olivia had already known who she was, after all. Nothing she said had been a secret in any way, and she supposed word had gotten around that she was visiting the region and had been there for a few weeks.

“What does she like? Necklaces, earrings, bracelets, what?” The young kahuna started pulling some shelves around under the display, pulling a few of them on to the glass counter top.

Aurea had a pretty good idea of what Fennel’s tastes were, it was easy enough – anything pink, purple, or shiny. None of which helped her narrow it down. There was a lot of jewelry in front of her. Fancy jewelry was never something that interested the professor on her own, never wearing much of it herself. Her late mother had left quite a bit for her, most of which she had given to Fennel. Fennel knew what all of the jewels were, what they meant, and which ones to wear with which outfits.

There was one piece that caught her eye, though. A small crystal looking, heart shaped pendant set on a silver chain that didn’t look at all like the other pieces, somehow. “This necklace is interesting.”

“Ah, this one. I don’t have many left.” Olivia picked it up and set it down on a cloth on the table to provide a better look at it. “We can only make them one time a year and sometimes not at all if the temperature wasn’t low enough.”

“Why is that?”

“The Vulpix shed their coat, leaving behind these crystals that look like ice. They can only be made and found here in Alola! It’s my shop’s specialty.”

“So it’s Pokemon dandruff?”

“Er, sorta. But it makes for some nice jewelry, don’t you think?”

“I guess.” She couldn’t pretend to be as enthusiastic as Olivia was over it, because she simply didn’t get it. Fennel would like it, though. “I’ll take that one, then.” Maybe she would save it for a special occasion, even if she didn’t know for what yet. It was expensive enough to warrant a birthday or anniversary gift. Or maybe she would just give it to her as planned.

Olivia picked up the necklace, finding a box for it in a bin behind the counter somewhere. “You probably know Kukui and Burnett then, huh?” she mused as she looked around for something else.

“Oh, yes.”

“They’re really nice people. He comes in here a lot. I made her engagement ring, you know,” she continued, stuffing the box in a bag and taking a few of her business cards off of the counter to add to the contents of the bag. “Well, you’re all set, then.”

“Thanks. Let me know if you’re ever in Unova, alright?”

Olivia gave a cheerful nod to this, waving in the same tone as the professor saw herself out.

Olivia was friendly enough, if not a bit bold. The professor could see she and Fennel becoming fast friends should they ever meet.

With what started with time to spare ended in her being late now. Kukui and Burnet were already seated at the restaurant, them noticing her before she could scan the room.

“Aurea Juniper!” Burnet pulled her in to a hug before she had any time to react. “It’s been forever!”

“Professor,” she extended her hand to him, only to be pulled in to another awkward hug.

“Alola!”

“How are you? How’s Fennel?”

“Fine, it’s all fine,” Professor Juniper barely had time to take her seat across from them and pick up the menu before the questions started.

“You know, I really wish she had come with you. She could of stayed with us, we’d have been happy to show her around.”

“I know, but she’s been very busy herself. So have you guys, for that matter.”

“I’m sure we’re all always busy. But we should make time for friends, right?” Kukui set down his menu to add. “I bet she’d love it here!”

“Fennel’s never been to Alola. She’s been wanting to come here as long as I’ve known her. She really wanted to go for our honeymoon, but then she changed her mind when she saw how busy it gets in the summer.”

“You’re both always welcome, you know that,” Burnet repeated.

“Maybe you should come back to Unova. Let us know when you come to visit your family.”

“Aurea and Fennel were roomies in college,”Burnet started, turning to her husband. “Then they got married.”

“That’s not...the exact progression,” Aurea attempted to hide her face in the menu, despite that she already knew what she wanted.

Yet Burnet continued, seeming fueled by her friend’s embarrassment. “Fennel had a thing for her for a long time.”

“I’m not the one that went to Alola for a research assignment and came back showing off that rock on your hand,” she attempted to direct the attention off of herself and on to the other couple.

“No, but Fennel showed me the one you got for her.” Burnet shrugged off Juniper’s comment, even if it was true. “They were together for, like, 10 years before they got married. Had a house and a lab and everything. Aurea thought they were being secretive, didn’t you?”

“It’s beside the point now.”

Aurea was certain that her old friend was only telling her husband this now in an attempt to embarrass her, and it was working. Surely she had told him all of this before. Even if it was the case, he was laughing. Burnet had actually known Fennel first, and introduced them in college. She was also confident Fennel had confided in her with other details of their relationship through the years, and the professor was perfectly happy not knowing what.

“Speaking of rocks, you were at Olivia’s, huh?” Kukui gestured to the bag that sat next to Aurea.

“Yeah. Thought I’d introduce myself to the Kahuna. She’s a very sweet girl.”

“But you bought something, eh?”

“I, um...” revealing the contents to them would only result in more attention on herself, which she did not want. But maybe it was best to get it over it. Picking up the bag, she handed it across the table for the couple to inspect. “Be careful with it. It’s for Fennel.”

The two scientists had opened it and gazed upon it for a short time, both smiling and handing it back quicker than Aurea thought they might.

“You did good. She’s going to like it,” Burnet had some sort of sly smile. “It’s just hard to imagine you in a jewelry store picking that out for her.”

She had never been so thankful to have a waitress approach and take their orders.  

Their lunch was nice at least. Burnet couldn’t open her mouth to embarrass her if they were all eating, even if it had all been in good fun.

“I hope that next time you’re here we’ll be able to spend more time together than just lunch. Unless I make it to Unova by then,” Burnet gave her one more hug upon their departure.

“It was great seeing you guys, really.”

“Tell Fennel to come visit, with or without you.”

She couldn’t help but laugh at that. “We’ll see.”

Aurea didn’t know why she felt such a rush to get back to her hotel, besides to finish up some paperwork so she had less to do once arriving home. Fennel would want her to take the next few days off, and she probably would, if only to enjoy being in her own space for a few days and not hotel rooms and camp sites.

She was trying to wait until it was late enough in the day in Unova to call Fennel. If it was 2 am in Alola, it would be around 10 am or so in Unova. Or something like that.

Fennel quickly answered the video call, though she seemed a bit distracted. “Aurea, hi!”

The professor couldn’t help but smile upon seeing the other’s face on the screen. “I figured I’d call you at the lab because you’d be on the computer. You’re not busy, are you?”

“Not really,” Fennel started, seemingly organizing some papers around her computer desk. “But I can talk for a little bit.”

“We’re done in Konikoni City. I’m actually in a hotel. I’ll be home tomorrow evening.”

“I can’t wait. I miss you so much. And when you get home, we’re going to have sex all night. And we can take a bubble bath, and drink some wine, but mostly I just want to touch you again.”

“Is….is anyone there….with you…?” the professor’s face was definitely turning red, not that Fennel seemed at all alarmed by this or what she was saying to cause it.

“Oh, yeah. My assistant’s here, and Bianca. Bianca, Marie, say hi to Aurea!” Fennel picked her laptop up and spun her chair around, turning the screen so that they could see it across the room. The professor gave a hesitant wave to the other two women,  both who gave over exaggerated waves in return. They both seemed rather occupied, only looking up when Fennel prompted them to. Thankfully blissfully unaware. She really had been gone for too long if the dream scientist was being so forward with her.

“I had lunch with Burnet and Kukui this afternoon,”  she attempted to change the subject.

“How are they? I’m glad you were able to take time away from looking at rocks to be a normal person and socialize. When are we going to go to Alola? I miss Burnet,” Fennel had looked down at her papers again, throwing some off to the side but not wavering in her conversation.

“They’re fine. They’d be glad to see you, too. I’d be happy to take you there sometime.”

“We’re about due for a vacation, I think,” Fennel gave a wistful sigh. “But mostly, I just want you home with me. I’m so bored without you here.”

“You want me home because you’re bored?”

“Mostly, yeah,” the quick response met with giggles on both behalves.

“Well, my plane should get in tomorrow around 8. I’ll text you when I’m on my last transfer.”

“Hm...will you take a few days off to spend with me before you get all wrapped up in your research stuff?”

“I suppose.”

Fennel was still smiling, but seemed suddenly alarmed by something off camera. “I need to go, I’m sorry. There’s a trainer call coming through. I’ll see you tomorrow, I love you!”

Aurea didn’t have time to repeat the sentiments before Fennel had hung up the call. She’d rather Fennel tend to her work than ignore trainers for her sake. They would have time to catch up and plan vacations, especially now that she had promised Fennel a few days without her research coming between them.

They hadn’t spent but more than a few minutes speaking, but the yawn that crept up on the professor reminded her of how late it was. She would cram in as much note taking as she could before the hour was up, and force herself to sleep at some point. A night’s rest and a few plane rides were all that stood between her and being reunited with her beloved wife.

[singledadhamilton]

Storytime: The Scissors Incident Part 1

John POV

Part 1

It’s storytime!!!

Hello, you adorable and lovable fans whereas every Saturdays or Tuesdays (Williams forgot to mention that part) where one of us Hamilton kids will tell you a story from our childhood. They’re the craziest, funniest, and scariest event that ever happens in our lives for the past ten years. But pfft, this is known as from my family especially our family known as the scissors incident as it was something very unexpected and so yeah. This is a going a two-part story which yall needs how the event lead Let’s get on with this story.

This event took around when Philip, Angie, AJ, and James were about 12 ten years old and us which meant practically me, Williams, Eliza, and PJ was about 8 or 9 years old. I think us younger quadruplet were about 9 since we were only about 2 1/2 years apart. But anyway not relevant to the first part of the story...during the time between what  ....the incident occurs to our mom and dad. Well, dad has already been a single dad for almost a year at that time and we were returning to New York after leaving Nevis that we live over there for 3 years. FYI: We move to Nevis after month from the trick or treat incident. It was kind of hard for us to accept the fact to that we’re leaving Nevis since that became our true home despite being born and raised in NYC for the first years in our childhood but they never remind us such happy memories. My dad went through a harsh heartbreak because of my mother and soon my dad becomes a single dad to eight kids for the past ten years. So, after the incident, my dad immediately packed all our stuff up, sold all the items we didn’t need and got everything packed in order to live in Nevis. Turns out that my Uncle James whom my father assume perish in the hurricane many years ago. After telling him what happened between him and my mother...Tio James automatically pays for all the airports, tickets, and everything.

Next thing you know our little asses were living Nevis and we only talked Spanish both in the household but talked both English and Spanish outside the household. Since we mostly talked English during our times in New York but since my dad is a Hispanic Caribbean Immigrant. He thought it would be nice to know where our ancestry roots come from while speaking Spanish in the household.

Now, all you’re wondering well why does this have to do with the story? Why are you telling about your past? Hold it for a minute and listen closely my adorable fans. Ok.

After returning NYC from Nevis my siblings and I were trying to talk English more often nowadays since we always talked Spanish during our stay in the Caribbeans. Anyway, my dad worked a full-time job at this local 24 hours diner and we didn’t really see him that often since Papa was always trying to make ends meet. So we were trying to adapt talking more in English with each other but still felt a bit weird cause we have gotten so used to talking Spanish for the past three years. That when we as siblings decided that we speak Spanish at home and English when we go out with friends or school. And I remember this incident occur during summer vacation and we just been in New York for about two weeks now. I wanna say two weeks cause Angie is the one waking me up early for breakfast. I remember waking up in such bitchy ass mood since I ain't-a morning and still not to this day.

I glare at my sister and crankily toss my blanket aside with an attitude. Letting yall know in advance that I never acted this way with my dad. Cause Papa Hamilton doesn’t play around and he won’t hesitate to whoop my ass with the Chancla. Just thinking about it still send shivers down my spine. But yeah, my older sister loves me to death for being patient with me. Nevertheless, I was pissed that my sister woke me up early in the morning even though it was summer vacation. I didn’t want to go my Tia Peggy condo so she could babysit us while Papa work. Worst of all after washing my face, brushing my teeth, basically the typical getting ready morning such.

Worst of all is when Angie pull out the comb and oh my gosh...WWIII was about to start. My hair is naturally curly and wavy I hated when Philip and Angie would comb my hair since they’re heavy handed. I always prefer my dad combing my hair since he knows that it hurts if you pull the comb a bit too hard. But I was having none of is so I was doing the most and started fighting with my sister. I was swinging my arms and legs acting like a crazy person before Angie places the comb down and started shaking me saying...

“John!! Jackie bebe enough!!! You ain’t dying”  

Let’s not be judgy here ok. Let not. An older sibling can handle so much from their younger siblings. Especially dealing with a hardcore temper tantrum and I give credit to older siblings for actually dealing bratty younger siblings I’ve met during my middle school years.

Back to the story, I was still acting crazy and swinging around cause I didn’t want my hair to be combed. This kept on for a good five minutes until finally, my sister lost it. Angelica lost her shit and next thing I know smack. You guys, everything went frozen for me and touch my cheek where my older sister has smacked me hard across the face. It wasn’t even a slap or oh no it was a full on smack across the face. This immediately shocks me cause #1 cause she’s my older sister and wasn’t my disciplinary, #2 she has never smack me before and never lost her patient before, and #3 it really hurt me that Angie had the gut to smack me across the face. I like “Girl, I know you did not just hit me on the face” but I didn’t do anything at all. I just stood there frozen like a statue as my sister combs my hair.  

I automatically put on my hoodie and cover my face since I didn’t want to look at anybody, I especially didn’t wanna look at Angie ugly ass face. Just kidding sis, I love you and you’re beautiful so yeah. My dad didn’t question it cause he knew that when I’m upset about something or someone I’ll put my hoodie on so I don’t explode and take my anger out on anyone else. But I guess he thought I was mad at him for letting Angie comb my hair. So we ate breakfast very fast cause my dad has to go to work an hour early than usual, after arriving at Tia Peggy condo and say our goodbyes to Papa after dropping us off. Us all eight kids including Uncle Lafayette and Uncle Hercules kids: Georges, Anastasie, Marie, Henriette, William Cooke, and John W. Which adds up to 14 hyper kids in one huge condo with one woman watching us as our parents work. All 14 of us place our stuff on the coffee table in the living room before going to the playroom for the younger kids and the game room for the older kids. I put my spiderman backpack on the coffee table and took off my hoodie since I felt that I wasn’t mad at Angie anymore.

As soon I took my hoodie off Henriette took one look at us and gasp as if I grow a second head or a third eyeball. I gave her a confused look and asks

“Henri? What’s wrong?”

“Yo...Your cheek...”

“What about my cheeks?”

“One of them is red”

“Red?”

As soon Henri says the word “red” my Tia Peggy automatically come to us and also given me a worry somewhat concerns look on her face. She quickly drops down to her knees and inspected my right cheek before touching with the tip of her fingers as if I would break. I was looking her and Henri all wondering “What chu mean my cheek is all red? Like I wanna know”. Peggy hugged me tightly and looking at me all scared and freaking out on the inside which made me scared as well. Like, I didn’t know what they meant about my cheek being red and with my, Tia Peggy hugging me tightly and acting very concern just seem all weird and guilty in a way. And she started asking me all of these questions like

“John, sweetie. What happens to your face, baby? Did your siblings do it? Or did you fell and hit your face?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about Tia. Can I go and use the restroom?”

My tia just let my little self-crept to the restroom which was right next to the game room so I enter and did my business. Cause I really need to pee as well but after doing my own thing as I’m watching my hands that when I notice the red mark on my cheek where Angie has smacked me early in the morning. It was still a fresh red color and you could see the finger marks of the mark. It actually looked like I came from an abusive hold house which made me very angry knowing that Angie has the audacity to let come here with a red mark on my face. Now that Henri and Tia saw it I was mortified, embarrassed, and angry. I storm myself out of the restroom and just saw Angie playing Pacman with Philip and I was just glaring so hard with tears streaming down my face. Next thing you know in my head I told myself...

“I’m calling dad. I just want my Papi right now!”

I race toward Peggy and began crying my eyes out which freaked her out overall and automatically her future mother instinct flew within her. Getting down on her knees again to level at my height before wiping my tears away.

“Jackie, sweetie. You ok? You want me to call your dad”

“Please...I want my daddy right now. I want to call my dad right now”

She quickly calls my dad as I’m still crying my eyes out and talked with him for a while. I couldn’t stop crying since I felt so mad that Angie has smacked me and angry at myself that I didn’t tell my dad sooner. As she handed me the phone I kept on crying even though I tried to stop but I couldn’t. My dad started freaking out cause he knows that I don’t cry for no apparent reason unlike someone I know ha.

“John, mijo!! Bebe que paso? Why are you crying?”

“Angie me golpeó. Ella tortazos yo difícilmente en la cara. Ahora, mi mejilla es todo roja de cuando ella me golpeó… y deseo ser con usted… papá”   (Angie hit me. She smacks me hard on the face. Now, my cheek is all red from when she hit me...and I wanna be with you...daddy)

“Ella qué?”  (She what?)

Ladies and Gentlemen when I told my father that my older sister has smacked me across the face. I knew that I have sealed my sister fate. Papa Hamilton is very crazy for a lack of better words especially with his children due to that he’s a single dad now. He’ll go craz craz if someone ever laid a single finger on us and my dad would lose his shit right then and there. Not only that, but he’s also strict with us being family and us getting along since he assumes that his brother died many years and regretted never bonding with Tio James until now.

So my father one and only rules for all of us as kids were:

“None of yall are loud to hit each other. I understand that you’re siblings and you’ll fight but if I ever see you hit one another. You will be punished if yall have problem one another you’ll come to talk with me and we’ll sort this out. Do I make myself clear?”  

If my dad ever heard that my older sister just slap me earlier in the morning. Oooh.....she better starts saying her prayers right now. Next thing I heard the tone of his voice change from concern and worry to furious and angry. And it wasn’t when he yells that scare me it was when he scolds you in such a calm voice that has a hint of anger within it frightens me to the depth of my soul. I never heard my father in that tone before perhaps maybe with my older siblings but never to us since I guess we were still a bit young. Still, that’s not the case...I remember what he told before coming over to Tia Peggy condo.

“I’ll come to pick you up mijo and I’ll talk to your sister about it”

“Ooh ok”

After my father and I finish talking once again but lasted for about a few more minutes before hanging up. I left it at that and soon went to the playroom and started stacking blocks. Williams and Eliza were wondering how did my cheek get a mark and why my cheek is all red? But I didn’t answer them and just minded my own business just waiting for Papi to come here and ready to scream at Angelica in front of everybody. As I said, Papa Hamilton is crazy with his kids, especially with his younger kids. I was just minding my own business until suddenly I heard the door slamming shut. My siblings and I instantly knew that it was our dad slamming the door which meant...he is pissed off. I saw him coming into the playroom with a blank expression on his face but I knew on the inside he was furious that Angelica has slapped me across the face.

Not even saying a word to me I automatically walk toward to him just feeling happy that he was here. My siblings were shocked and confuse seem my father always worked for a full on 12 hours. Until happen something happens to one of us so this situation was very serious. My dad got down on his knees looked my cheek that was still a bright red color. He still hasn’t spoken a single word so Papa took me to the sala and the first time throughout the whole ordeal my dad finally before snapping his fingers.

“Siéntese”

I hop my little ass on the couch as my dad went upstairs again to where the game room was at for the older kids. Not even five minutes later I heard Angie squeal lightly while Tia Peggy close both doors of the game room and the playroom. Next thing I know, all I heard was a thud and a smack!!!!

You guys my dad grabbed my sister by the hair, push her against the wall, and smack her across the face. And before yall starts getting all trigger of offense letting yall know that my dad isn’t abusive. Hell no. My dad gives the ordinary spanking that many parents do but if one of us kid hits each other then he’ll smack across the face.

1. For acting stupid and being violent

2. Cause you disobey his number 1 rule about us hitting each other.

I didn’t saw him smacking Angelica but I heard it loud enough from the sala before Dad began one his lectures. I wish he was yelling and it would be over it. But nope it was in his scary clam voice.

“How you do like it? How you do like being smack across the face?  How could slap your 9-year-old brother across the face and let him come here? Knowing you...yourself that his face was  all markup”

Angie began stammering and twisting her words over while explaining to dad...even though she just got slap by him.

“Well, he wasn’t listening..o..k...I was trying to comb his hair. He was swinging his arms and legs at me!! He was being bad though...”

“NO!! Unacceptable!! You knew perfectly well that you weren't allowed to hit any of your siblings. Instead of calling Philip or Me to clam John down. You let yourself get all impatient and smack John on the face. And be lucky this is a summer vacation and not a school day. Cause if you let him come to school looking like that...the teachers or possible the principal will believe that I’m the one that him. Not only will the police be involved but so will CPS. DO you know how hard it is for dads to get full custody of their kids despite having a clean record? Not only that but they’re also waiting for them to screw up so they can take the kids away. Do you want that to happen?”

I’m not sure what happened next but Papa Hamilton brought my sister into the living room and face her in front of me. She kept looking down at the ground with my dad who was waiting for her to speak and apologize. She looked at me in the eyes with her cheek now all red when Papa slap her.

“Look, John. I’m gotten impatient with you and I shouldn’t slap you across”  Angie spoke with a guilty look on her face but I didn’t care with a nonchalant attitude and response.

“It’s ok”

My dad and I peace out of the Condo where he took to the local diner. But I still wasn’t satisfied till I got my revenge on Angie. I’m gonna end this story here tonight and we’ll upload the second part either on Tuesday or next Saturday. Bye.

[xtruss]

Who Scams The Scammers? Meet The Scambaiters

Police struggle to catch online fraudsters, often operating from overseas, but now a new breed of amateurs are taking matters into their own hands

— Amelia Tait | Sunday, 03 October 2021 | Guardian USA

‘My computer’s giving me the worst vibes,’ began Rosie in Kim Kardashian’s voice. Illustration: Pete Reynolds/The Observer

Three to four days a week, for one or two hours at a time, Rosie Okumura, 35, telephones thieves and messes with their minds. For the past two years, the LA-based voice actor has run a sort of reverse call centre, deliberately ringing the people most of us hang up on – scammers who pose as tax agencies or tech-support companies or inform you that you’ve recently been in a car accident you somehow don’t recall. When Okumura gets a scammer on the line, she will pretend to be an old lady, or a six-year-old girl, or do an uncanny impression of Apple’s virtual assistant Siri. Once, she successfully fooled a fake customer service representative into believing that she was Britney Spears. “I waste their time,” she explains, “and now they’re not stealing from someone’s grandma.”

Okumura is a “scambaiter” – a type of vigilante who disrupts, exposes or even scams the world’s scammers. While scambaiting has a troubled 20-year online history, with early forum users employing extreme, often racist, humiliation tactics, a new breed of scambaiters are taking over TikTok and YouTube. Okumura has more than 1.5 million followers across both video platforms, where she likes to keep things “funny and light”.

“I waste their time and now they’re not stealing from someone’s grandma.” — Rosie Okumura

In April, the then junior health minister Lord Bethell tweeted about a “massive sudden increase” in spam calls, while a month earlier the consumer group Which? found that phone and text fraud was up 83% during the pandemic. In May, Ofcom warned that scammers are increasingly able to “spoof” legitimate telephone numbers, meaning they can make it look as though they really are calling from your bank. In this environment, scambaiters seem like superheroes – but is the story that simple? What motivates people like Okumura? How helpful is their vigilantism? And has a scambaiter ever made a scammer have a change of heart?

Batman became Batman to avenge the death of his parents; Okumura became a scambaiter after her mum was scammed out of $500. In her 60s and living alone, her mother saw a strange pop-up on her computer one day in 2019. It was emblazoned with the Windows logo and said she had a virus; there was also a number to call to get the virus removed. “And so she called and they told her, ‘You’ve got this virus, why don’t we connect to your computer and have a look.” Okumura’s mother granted the scammer remote access to her computer, meaning they could see all of her files. She paid them $500 to “remove the virus” and they also stole personal details, including her social security number.

Thankfully, the bank was able to stop the money leaving her mother’s account, but Okumura wanted more than just a refund. She asked her mum to give her the number she’d called and called it herself, spending an hour and 45 minutes wasting the scammer’s time. “My computer’s giving me the worst vibes,” she began in Kim Kardashian’s voice. “Are you in front of your computer right now?” asked the scammer. “Yeah, well it’s in front of me, is that… that’s like the same thing?” Okumura put the video on YouTube and since then has made over 200 more videos, through which she earns regular advertising revenue (she also takes sponsorships directly from companies).

“A lot of it is entertainment – it’s funny, it’s fun to do, it makes people happy,” she says when asked why she scambaits. “But I also get a few emails a day saying, ‘Oh, thank you so much, if it weren’t for that video, I would’ve lost $1,500.’” Okumura isn’t naive – she knows she can’t stop people scamming, but she hopes to stop people falling for scams. “I think just educating people and preventing it from happening in the first place is easier than trying to get all the scammers put in jail.”

She has a point – in October 2020, the UK’s national fraud hotline, run by City of London Police-affiliated Action Fraud, was labelled “not fit for purpose” after a report by Birmingham City University. An earlier undercover investigation by the Times found that as few as one in 50 fraud reports leads to a suspect being caught, with Action Fraud frequently abandoning cases. Throughout the pandemic, there has been a proliferation of text-based scams asking people to pay delivery fees for nonexistent parcels – one victim lost £80,000 after filling in their details to pay for the “delivery”. (To report a spam text, forward it to 7726.)

Hook, line and sinker: the scambaiters. Illustration: Pete Reynolds

Asked whether vigilante scambaiters help or hinder the fight against fraud, an Action Fraud spokesperson skirted the issue. “It is important people who are approached by fraudsters use the correct reporting channels to assist police and other law enforcement agencies with gathering vital intelligence,” they said via email. “Word of mouth can be very helpful in terms of protecting people from fraud, so we would always encourage you to tell your friends and family about any scams you know to be circulating.”

Indeed, some scambaiters do report scammers to the police as part of their operation. Jim Browning is the alias of a Northern Irish YouTuber with nearly 3.5 million subscribers who has been posting scambaiting videos for the past seven years. Browning regularly gets access to scammers’ computers and has even managed to hack into the CCTV footage of call centres in order to identify individuals. He then passes this information to the “relevant authorities” including the police, money-processing firms and internet service providers.

“I wouldn’t call myself a vigilante, but I do enough to say, ‘This is who is running the scam,’ and I pass it on to the right authorities.” He adds that there have only been two instances where he’s seen a scammer get arrested. Earlier this year, he worked with BBC’s Panorama to investigate an Indian call centre – as a result, the centre was raided by local police and the owner was taken into custody.

Browning says becoming a YouTuber was “accidental”. He originally started uploading his footage so he could send links to the authorities as evidence, but then viewers came flooding in. “Unfortunately, YouTube tends to attract a younger audience and the people I’d really love to see looking at videos would be older folks,” he says. As only 10% of Browning’s audience are over 60, he collaborates with the American Association of Retired People to raise awareness of scams in its official magazine. “I deliberately work with them so I can get the message a little bit further afield.”

Still, that doesn’t mean Browning isn’t an entertainer. In his most popular upload, with 40m views, he calmly calls scammers by their real names. “You’ve gone very quiet for some strange reason,” Browning says in the middle of a call, “Are you going to report this to Archit?” The spooked scammer hangs up. One comment on the video – with more than 1,800 likes – describes getting “literal chills”.

But while YouTube’s biggest and most boisterous stars earn millions, Browning regularly finds his videos demonetised by the platform – YouTube’s guidelines are broad, with one clause reading “content that may upset, disgust or shock viewers may not be suitable for advertising”. As such, Browning still also has a full-time job.

YouTube isn’t alone in expressing reservations about scambaiting. Jack Whittaker is a PhD candidate in criminology at the University of Surrey who recently wrote a paper on scambaiting. He explains that many scambaiters are looking for community, others are disgruntled at police inaction, while some are simply bored. He is troubled by the “humiliation tactics” employed by some scambaiters, as well as the underlying “eye for an eye” mentality.

“I’m someone who quite firmly believes that we should live in a system where there’s a rule of law,” Whittaker says. For scambaiting to have credibility, he believes baiters must move past unethical and illegal actions, such as hacking into a scammer’s computer and deleting all their files (one YouTube video entitled “Scammer Rages When I Delete His Files!” has more than 14m views). Whittaker is also troubled by racism in the community, as an overcrowded job market has led to a rise in scam call centres in India. Browning says he has to remove racist comments under his videos.

“I think scambaiters have all the right skills to do some real good in the world. However, they’re directionless,” Whittaker says. “I think there has to be some soul- searching in terms of how we can better utilise volunteers within the policing system as a whole.”

At least one former scambaiter agrees with Whittaker. Edward is an American software engineer who engaged in an infamous bait on the world’s largest scambaiting forum in the early 2000s. Together with some online friends, Edward managed to convince a scammer named Omar that he had been offered a lucrative job. Omar paid for a 600-mile flight to Lagos only to end up stranded.

“He was calling us because he had no money. He had no idea how to get back home. He was crying,” Edward explains. “And I mean, I don’t know if I believe him or not, but that was the one where I was like, ‘Ah, maybe I’m taking things a little too far.’” Edward stopped scambaiting after that – he’d taken it up when stationed in a remote location while in the military. He describes spending four or five hours a day scambaiting: it was a “part-time job” that gave him “a sense of community and friendship”.

“I mean, there’s a reason I asked to remain anonymous, right?” Edward says when asked about his actions now. “I’m kind of embarrassed for myself. There’s a moment where it’s like, ‘Oh, was I being the bad guy?’” Now, Edward doesn’t approve of vigilantism and says the onus is on tech platforms to root out scams.

Yet while the public continue to feel powerless in the face of increasingly sophisticated scams (this summer, Browning himself fell for an email scam which resulted in his YouTube channel being temporarily deleted), But scambaiting likely isn’t going anywhere. Cassandra Raposo, 23, from Ontario began scambaiting during the first lockdown in 2020. Since then, one of her TikTok videos has been viewed 1.5m times. She has told scammers her name is Nancy Drew, given them the address of a police station when asked for her personal details, and repeatedly played dumb to frustrate them.

“I believe the police and tech companies need to do more to prevent and stop these scams, but I understand it’s difficult,” says Raposo, who argues that the authorities and scambaiters should work together. She hopes her videos will encourage young people to talk to their grandparents about the tactics scammers employ and, like Browning, has received grateful emails from potential victims who’ve avoided scams thanks to her content. “My videos are making a small but important difference out there,” she says. “As long as they call me, I’ll keep answering.”

For Okumura, education and prevention remain key, but she’s also had a hand in helping a scammer change heart. “I’ve become friends with a student in school. He stopped scamming and explained why he got into it. The country he lives in doesn’t have a lot of jobs, that’s the norm out there.” The scammer told Okumura he was under the impression that, “Americans are all rich and stupid and selfish,” and that stealing from them ultimately didn’t impact their lives. (Browning is more sceptical – while remotely accessing scammers’ computers, he’s seen many of them browsing for the latest iPhone online.)

“At the end of the day, some people are just desperate,” Okumura says. “Some of them really are jerks and don’t care… and that’s why I keep things funny and light. The worst thing I’ve done is waste their time.”

[backupthere]

I couldn’t get the formatting to co-operate as an Ask-Reply, so:

@docbeeski asked:  For the Dvd commentary, from Nothing Like Potter:

"How long have you.. " Nick's voice cracks and he clears his throat. "How long have you been sleeping in a cupboard?" "Since January." Will can't look him in the eye. "Fuck. Jesus, Will, why didn't you say something?" Will shrugs. "I don't know." "You're an idiot." He sounds angry. Will doesn’t look up. He knows he’s an idiot, okay, but he's got too far into this mess to figure it out.

*

Yeah, so, this got LONG.

This is a really interesting pick, because this section is the pivot point for the whole story - I’m guessing you chose it deliberately?

Up until this point, Will’s life has been slipping out of his control, and he’s now at a point where he doesn’t know how to fix it. This scene, where Nick realises that Will’s been sleeping rough at the ice rink, is the turning point and everything from here on moves towards the resolution.

At this stage, Will’s coming to see his situation as normal and even sustainable - he’s got somewhere relatively safe to sleep, he’s got money coming in, he’s got access to cooking, washing and laundry facilities. It’s a long way from ideal, but having sunk this low he’s now at least in a steady position. The scene immediately prior to this is upbeat - he’s had a good game, he’s having normal fun interactions with his sister, and then he comes back down to the cupboard where he’s been sleeping and realises that Nick’s discovered his secret. It’s a rapid change of tone, to match the shock to Will of being found out.

Will’s reaction to being caught is to assume the worst. Nick calls him an idiot, and Will immediately interprets that as you’re an idiot for not being able to keep a home like a proper adult - his train of thought a couple of lines after this extract shows this more clearly:

He feels sick with embarrassment that he's been found out like this, Nick's going to think less of him for dealing with this so badly, he’s going to be in trouble with the rink, with the team, Darren's going to bench him or kick him off the team and if he has to go back to live with his parents he’s going to have to quit his job and his whole life is falling apart because he's been too stupid to face up to his problems he’s twenty-two he’s not going to cry he’s twenty-two and he should be able to cope with basic adult things like having somewhere to live but he’s made such a mess of everything-

The run-on sentence and lack of commas is deliberate as his thoughts get faster and faster to the point of overwhelming him.

Although Will has normalised his situation to himself, to an extent, he’s very much aware that this is not normal and he is not coping, and he’s ashamed of himself, and this is what comes straight to the front when Nick confronts him - he’s failed and he thinks that everybody’s going to think less of him as a result.

Nick, however, has a completely different take on it. He means you’re an idiot for thinking that this was the solution, any one of us would have helped.

Nick’s been sitting in the corridor for a while, waiting for Will. It’s cold, it’s quiet, it’s poorly lit, and he’s had time to think - and he feel responsible. When his voice cracks, he’s blaming himself for not noticing that Will, his rookie, his friend, was in such a bad situation, and for not being the kind of friend that Will could turn to. It’s not exactly pity that he feels for Will, although there is an element of that, but he’s coming at this from the perspective of here is a problem to fix.

And then he finds out that Will has been in this situation for about six weeks (it’s not specified in the story) and he feels even worse.

After he takes Will home with him, he’s up for hours talking to Sarah about it, and she has to talk him down from thinking he’s responsible and move on to finding a solution.

Nick’s closer to Will that perhaps either of them realise - Sarah’s picked up on it, she knows that Nick likes Will better than any of his other teammates, partly because they share idiosyncracies, but also because they just get on really well.

This is the first of the Back Up There stories to pick up the theme of the found family - it was never my intention for that theme to be there, but somehow it’s worked its way in.

Will’s taken in to Nick and Sarah’s family - he’s Uncle Will to Lily very quickly, and although Will doesn’t need a new family as his biological family are very much present in his life and happily so, he ends up very happy with the way that things work out. It works out well for Nick, Sarah and Lily as well, as they absorb him into their family unit.

There’s always been a poly question mark over this group - Nick and Sarah both refer to Will as a brother, in the later scenes, but I always had a vague idea that this could progress in a non-platonic direction. That was always something that would come later in their timeline - it didn’t fit in this part of the narrative, and it wasn’t the right time for me as a writer or for this series. In the end, it didn’t work out that way and I don’t think I’d ever write anything to move them in that direction. When they appear in the werewolf au, there’s a second child. I always intended that Lily would have a younger sibling, although there was always the faint chance that Will might be the father, but when Elijah appeared (and he exists in the non-werewolf universe too) he’s definitely Nick’s son.

However, if this is disappointing to anybody, I’ll admit that Will and Nick are so much a unit in my head that they frequently get given each other’s surname when they appear in drafts of other stories, so at least some part of me thinks they’re married.

This story has possibly the least cross-over with the other stories in the series. There’s a mention that Nick used to play for the Cobras, and he’s the goalie who gets injured in It Doesn’t Count, At Camp to open up the roster for Rob’s call-up, but other than that this is very self contained. Most of the later stories in the series have a reasonable amount of overlap, because the guys all know each other and have connections. Characters from previous stories have cameos in game scenes, and the back-up goalies from seven out of the ten teams have a group chat which features sometimes.

The only three goalies who don’t feature in the group chat are the guy from the Tornadoes (story coming soon to a screen near you!), established in other stories to be a “proper grown up” by the guys in the chat with the impression that they find him a bit intimidating and don’t know how to ask if he’d like to join, Ricky from Glitter, who we know is an incredibly private person, and Will.

Leaving Will (and Ricky, to an extent) out of the group chat wasn’t actually a conscious decision on my part. It just seemed obvious, when I was working out who should contribute to the dialogue and how the dynamics of the group would unfold, that nobody had asked Will to join. We know that Coop or Damien or Addy will chat to anybody who keeps still for thirty seconds, we know that Pete and Jonny are outgoing, and that Jack and Billy will go along with things (...well. You don’t know much about Billy yet. Coming a bit later to a screen near you…).

Will’s a very self-contained character - he doesn’t appear in any other stories except when somebody’s playing his team, and then he usually appears by his surname because nobody’s really friends with him. This extends to the rest of the team, to a certain level, as none of the family connections (the Lewis brothers or the Evans clan, for example) include the Griffins, and they just haven’t featured as rounded characters. Even in Will and Nick’s chapter of the werewolf AU, it’s just their little family and nobody else.

I’ve been going through the list of protagonists, and Will’s interesting because he’s the only one who doesn’t actually have a face. Many of the protagonists have a physical similarity to a real guy out there, as I’ve either written a story inspired by some tiny interaction I’ve witnessed, or realised later that a guy in front of me was a great fit for how I saw a character.

Ricky’s the only other clear protagonist (the Huskies are a bit different because there’s so many of them, but even then I know what everybody looks like) who has never had a physical fit, and I have a much better idea of what he looks like because it’s relevant to his storyline. Will’s never physically described (a common feature in my writing, it seems…) and as far as I’m concerned he’s a fairly generic sandy-haired guy, but it’s never mattered with Will in the same way. He’s the kind of guy who blends easily into crowds.

I think that this story, more than any of the others in the series, is complete in that I’ve never wanted to add extras or write a sequel. I’ve either written additional scenes or planned follow-ups for pretty much everybody else, but there’s nothing for me that’s crying out to be said about what happens next for Will. I didn’t like this story any less than any of the others while I was writing it, and re-reading this section still makes my heart clench for Will and his rock-bottom - I just feel that I said everything I needed to within the story.

(That said, I’m always open to answering questions...)

[peter-horrocks]

Inside France review of 2020

People around the world will be thinking that 2020 has been the most testing and unpredictable of years in our lifetime. Yet despite the turmoil, for some it was a good year, though undoubtedly tinged with a sense of sadness, bewilderment as to how insensitive and selfish many humans can be and admiration for how amazing many people are too. On a personal front this was a good year in many ways, though my perspective is not your average as the previous year I was fighting a battle with cancer and practically anything is better than that.

“Real generosity toward the future lies in giving all to the present.” Albert Camus

My best photo of 2020 taken on a bike ride up the Gorge du Loup near Grasse

The obvious dominant subject of 2020 was Covid 19 and I have great empathy for those adversely affected and directly involved. The virus popped up out of no-where and its impact has been incessant ever since. When I first became aware of it I asked my physiotherapist what she thought and if her son who was working in Tokyo was concerned. “Oh Corona, comme la bierre, boff!!” was her flippant reply. And I think that is where most people were at.

I’ve read a number of good books about the plague and how it spread, including Ken Follet’s brilliant World Without End and more recently I enjoyed the French classic La Peste by Albert Camus, French version. Transmission is key and human habits are why it spreads and our inability to adapt and accept change are our shortcomings, poor governance adds frustration. Thank goodness there are also those we acclaim as heroes too. It is so difficult battling an unseen entity which affects some badly but not others and which adapts too, as we all know now.

Home made mask

The media feeds on it and frankly, if I had a euro for every time I’ve seen a cotton bud thrust up someone’s nose on the news (what is news about that!!!) my pockets would be bulging, and of course now its needles in the arm time. Everyone’s become an expert or they’ve chosen to be ostrich’s and stuck their head firmly in the sand, and you can’t blame them really. The tension is palpable when it comes to masks in places where they are obligatory, I can’t help feeling angry when I see people not wearing them or with their noses poking out, as they often seem to have that smug look about them, like they are sooo independent-minded. It frustrates me to feel judgemental but its that wilful selfish thing that makes me angry, that sullen unwillingness to be part of the collective, as if we could survive regardless as an island, though obviously, we wouldn’t last a minute.

We’ve all been finding our way of coping and for some, it is much more difficult than others. At first, it was almost amusing to find oneself running from the back end of the apartment to the front balcony and back, repeat, for an hour in an effort to keep fit during tight confinement. We exchanged improvised mask ideas; I had a ski snood with a coffee filter stuffed down it! Initially, we were told the masks didn’t really work. The truth was they didn’t have enough of them and even worse here in France they had recently binned the reserve stock, so they were trying to hide their embarrassment. In fairness, that apart, the French government seem to have handled managing the virus relatively well so far though now there are vaccination issues aggravated by a vaccine sceptic population and slow bureaucracy.

There was something marvellous about discovering how well you could keep connected with friends and loved ones through WhatsApp video in particular. I hadn’t felt so connected to my elder brother living in South Africa ever. But when he died of a heart attack out walking in the hills with his friends over there the reality hit hard. A big delay in getting him back to the UK, a bigger delay for his wife to follow on and no opportunity to share in the grieving in the direct company of my family. There were seven of us brothers and sisters and I am by far the youngest, it is sad, strange and destabilising being down to six.

Additional anxiety was for my younger daughter who is a recently qualified doctor as is the man in her life. Both were having a small break before taking up their proper postings in the summer. They were enjoying hiking in the wilds of Scotland and a holiday with family in Asia and looking forward to more carefree travel after so many years of medical studies. They both bravely and unselfishly volunteered to work in one of the worst Covid affected hospitals in the UK. Heavily involved with the thankless task of informing families of their loss by video conference and in the testing of the recently approved Oxford vaccine, they were literally in the thick of it. Within two weeks of starting as volunteers, they both caught the virus, thankfully not badly and after an isolation period, they were straight back onto the wards. They have both taken up their proper posts now, in London, as the third wave comes crashing through. Understandably they are tired and don’t want to talk about it, it is very difficult, especially for them.

My elder daughter got caught up in things too. She was on a humanitarian posting in Nepal when the outbreak struck and only got out on the last plane to leave Kathmandu for the UK. Having a day off she had gone hang gliding in the morning, a first for her, an amazing thrill, she had just sent me photographs showing her flying, of stupendous views of the local lake and the Annapurna mountain range. Only to return and be told she had to pack and leave immediately. The next photo was of a night-time, deserted, frightening-looking Kathmandu where she managed to find one of the last hotels still open, a rough one. To say I was relieved when she got home and met up at the airport with her sister who similarly got the last plane out of Shri Lanka is an understatement. Thankfully, she managed to see out the first wave and much of the summer with the family of her friend who owns a nice property in the countryside near the sea, well away from it all.

Kathmandu in lockdown taken by my daughter

My anxiety and personal need were a desire to help them. Being stuck here in France and relatively at risk myself my options were limited. My main concern was for their mental health as my guess was that Covid was likely to affect everybodies. Shortly after my cancer treatment, my French wife’s sister gave me a couple of books by a French author, meditation master and philosopher Fabrice Midal. One was an introduction to meditation for westerners, non-religious and based on attention, more of an awakening and relevant to actually living life actively, not at all mind closing and definitely not relaxation. I found it very wise and tried the meditation in addition to my gentle yoga which is for my relaxation when I’m not out for a walk, playing football or cycling up a mountain. I still meditate and have found it fascinating, paying attention to the functioning of the most important thing of all, the one we nearly all neglect, the brain. Its no cure for anything but I found it a good exercise and felt it may help my girls.

Meditation book by Fabrice Midal, in french.

Unfortunately, it doesn’t exist in English. So I contacted the author and asked if he would mind me translating it, explaining that I thought it would help my daughters. To my surprise, he promptly replied and agreed saying he could probably then use it to publish it online. So, I set about translating it and explained what I was doing to my daughters and the eldest volunteered to proofread. Its nearly done and I can say that my eldest daughter found it very helpful and the youngest has at least read some of it. I had never translated a whole book before and I found it an interesting experience especially as a philosopher weighs his words and each one counts. Fabrice Midal appears regularly on French television as he is one of the country’s leading philosophers and authors. I have read a fair bit of Greek philosophy and have always had some interest in the subject as I find it helps make sense of life, up to now I was not aware of any contemporary philosophers worth reading. I have found him to be a real ray of light, someone I can relate to and admire and learn from. I think he deserves to be read more throughout the world; he is a man of the moment in my opinion. I never thought I’d see the day when I would sit on a meditation cushion, I don’t buy into the way most of it is practised at all, but I’m glad to have found one that suits me and I’m very glad to have been able to help my daughters if only in a small way.

Brexit end game After an anxious wait it's done and dusted, well nearly. I have made my permanent residency application, which was relatively simple and not too onerous, and I have a holding number and a statement that my rights in France continue as before. The only problem is a final processing delay of at least three months so still waiting to cross the t’s and dot the i’s when the administration is ready.

The mood in France Given the circumstances its not too bad and whist the government has its detractors they are less visible due to the various constraints at the moment and the more pressing business of dealing with the Covid crisis. There is moaning when things are obviously wrong but there does seem to be reactivity too as well as a good degree of solidarity, responsibility and helpfulness.

Best cultural moments Well, there haven’t been any as everything is shut and even when a few things like cinemas were open there was nothing much good on and certainly nothing worth risking being indoors with other people.

First day on the beach at Fréjus after lockdown number one

Best experience Stepping back out onto the football pitch in Saint Cezaire-Sur-Siagne was enormous for me. During my cancer treatment, I never thought I would be able to play football again. It’s a very simple thing kicking a ball around with fellow human beings, but I’ve always loved it to bits. Also in between lockdowns we managed to get down to the beach at Fréjus a couple of times in the morning when there were few people around and it was a real tonic to be able to enjoy the sea and sun, it was equally uplifting to be able to ride up into the mountains on my bike occassionally though hard getting the muscles going again each time.

Looking down towards the Gorge du Loup

Precious family moments The top was a visit from my elder daughter who managed to stay with us for a couple of weeks before getting back to the UK on the last flight before the second lockdown. A huge pickup, I enjoyed catching up with her work teaching online and coaching and being able to be there for her as well as visiting some nice places outdoors, especially the observatory at Caussols. 

And we also managed a lovely stay in a chalet in the high French Alps at Les Menuires in August along with my French wife’s daughters, son in law and five grandchildren, the sun shone on the verdant valley by day and the stars lit up our evening walks up the mountain, it was quite magical and great fun, I felt privileged to be part of it.

Selling my Dordogne property

I’ve finally given up on the idea that I might do something with my property in the Dordogne one day, so I’m selling it. It is composed of a beautiful big barn which I had re-roofed and opened some window openings at the start of a conversion (which I had planning for, now lapsed, but easy to re-new). Also a ruined small farmhouse. There is electricity and water but no drains (I did get permission for a septic tank but we never got round to installing it). Both are set on 1 hectare of land, mainly secluded, just one neighbour masked by trees and bushes on my side. 3km from the village of Montagrier near Périgueux. Price is 120,000 euros. If you know anyone who might be interested please let me know.

Classic 2cv It has been very enjoyable working with Classic 2cv again this year. We have brought lots of rusting old parts back to life and supplied enthusiasts far and wide with the means to keep their charming old French cars on the road. I have learned a lot and continue to grow in experience on the classic car front. Oddly its thrived during lockdowns as folk have channelled their time and energy into restoration of their cars.

So, as we head into the new year after a year like no other, the future looks uncertain, climate change and a biodiversity crisis are looming large in addition to the Covid virus. It feels important to survive, work, make the most of things, care about loved ones and to try and help.

Best wishes

Peter H

[ladyjaneasher-blog]

Wait I'm sorry for being misinformed, but the info about Paul calling Yoko a jap tart is not true? From what i read he sent a letter to john (i think) saying this. So it's not true? (because thank god if it's not true)

it’s okay, anon. let me reiterate: 

the full message – if you believe francie, that is – was “you and your jap tart think you’re hot shit” and the full quote reads:

“John obviously loved Paul enough to let him run wild if it would help ease the tension Paul was creating in the studio and at home. Yoko could see it too.

But Paul was treating them like shit too. He even sent them a hate letter once, unsigned, typed. I brought it in with the morning mail. Paul put most of his fan mail in a big basket and let it sit for weeks, but John and Yoko opened every piece. When they go to the anonymous note, they looked puzzled, looking at each other with genuine pain in their eyes.

‘You and your Jap tart think you’re hot shit’, it said. John put it on the mantle, and in the afternoon, Paul hopped in, prancing much the same self-conscious way he did when we met.

‘Oh I just did that for a lark…’ he said in his most sugar-coated accent.

It was embarrassing. The three of us swiveled around, staring at him. You could see the pain in John. Yoko simply rose above it, feeling only sympathy for John. I was sad to see the Lennons go, even though it took the pressure off of Paul.”

putting aside that you can already read the clear bias between the lines, sometimes in other retellings of the story, it’s said to be a postcard and other times it’s a typewritten message left in an envelope. the discrepancies here alone should tell you something. 

now, where does the claim come from? it comes from an ex-girlfriend of paul’s from the late 60s, who he has parted not on the best terms with: francie schwartz. francie wrote a book about her relationship with paul where francie claims that while john and yoko stayed at cavendish, they received a note saying “you and your jap tart think you’re hot shit”.

why is it bullshit? i have several points to make:

francie schwartz is one of the most unreliable sources in beatles history. ask any beatles researcher worth their salt on their opinion about francie and her book. what’s more important in this particular case: she relies almost exclusively on sensational claims to make her book body count (1972) more palatable and exciting to a general and broad public instead of actual proof. other such claims include paul having been sent love letters from brian; a claim just as insubstantial and without any actual tangible proof. 

first off, to get a more personal picture of francie during the time she wrote and published her book you have to ackowledge her agenda as the scorned ex-lover as is evidenced by the book itself as it displays a great deal of vindictiveness towards paul. read body count and you’ll know what  i mean. it’s absolutely vile in places.

second, the book was published in 1972 – when paul’s critical reputation was possibly at one of its lowest points – and it was published by none other than jann wenner’s rolling stone press, which very obviously chose john’s side in the john versus paul breakup era split and which back in the day had a lot of sway in the music industry. the magazine wasn’t yet the joke it was to become. something else that is interesting and slightly related: jann wenner. paul’s critical acclaim wasn’t at it lowest point because mccartney (the album) was years ahead in its day and the press just didn’t get it, but because wenner directly influenced his reviewers to slam paul for – as wenner saw it – breaking up the beatles. here’s the relevant quote:

“When I became record reviews editor, I made it clear to him after a few months — nobody had done the job before me — that the record review section was an independent republic within the country of Rolling Stone. That meant that nobody else could tell me what to review or what a writer could say. They could argue with me, but ultimately it was my decision. And that worked well. There was one incident where Paul McCartney makes his first solo record and people thought it was wonderful: this rough, homemade one-man-band album. It was accompanied by a press release, a self-interview, about why he no longer needed the Beatles and how little he thought of them … this real obnoxious statement, you know? I assigned it to a friend of mine, Langdon Winner, and Jann saw the piece and said: “We can’t run it this way — he’s just reviewing it as if it’s this nice little record. It’s not just a nice little record, it’s a statement and it’s taking place in a context that we know: it’s one person breaking up the band. This is what needs to be talked about.” I said I didn’t agree and “in any case it’s up to Langdon to say what he wants to say.” Jann said, “We have to talk about this.” So we went to dinner that night and spent three fucking hours arguing about this record review. Finally he convinced me. So I went over to Langdon’s and sat down with him and spent three more hours arguing with him until I convinced him! Now to me this was the essence of great editing, of how you put out a publication that is utterly honest. All that time spent over one 750 word review! And it was worth it.”

—Greil Marcus in conversation with Simon Reynolds,

Los Angeles Review of Books

there are other instances where wenner displays his clear bias against paul, which was especially rampant in the time where paul was hailed as the talentless and flighty hack who did nothing more than book the studio for the beatles and john as the deeply misunderstood true lyrical and musical genius behind the beatles. a narrative that was formed then and persists to this day.

third, a number of writers – including, disappointingly, doggett and carlin – have recounted the “jap tart” episode from paul to john and yoko as fact, but it’s NOT. it’s the unverified retrospective eyewitness testimony years after it happened of a very much biased, secondhand source. we’ve never seen evidence from anyone else that this event occurred. no picture, no copy, nothing. just like any other event francie “remembers”, if i might add. and since other private notes and copies from letters and even journals exist from other and more deeply involved with the beatles people, it is suspicious.

even during “lennon remembers” – also done with involvement from wenner – john himself admits that his examples of the others treating yoko badly in the studio or elsewhere come off as him being paranoid. if he had indeed a clear and very much damning example, such as this “jap tart” postcard or typewritten message or handwritten note, why didn’t he bring it up? or, more glaringly, yoko herself? when discussing why she and john left cavendish in philip norman’s paul bio, she doesn’t mention this incident at all. why didn’t either of them ever bring up this incident in all the years after it supposedly occurred? 

it’s also important to point out that the narrative that paul was an absolute and continuous horror to john and yoko during the let it be era is just that: a narrative. let’s see what yoko has to say:

“After the initial embarrassment, then – um, now Paul is being very nice to me. He’s nice, and a – a very, um, str– on the level, straight sense. Like, um, whenever there’s something happening at Apple, he explains to me, as if I should know, [inaudible] and things like that. And also whenever there’s something like they need a light man or something like that, he asks me if I know of anybody in the art world, and things like that.

And like, um, I can see that he’s just now suddenly changing his attitude, like he’s being – he’s treating me with respect. Not because it’s me – but because I belong to John. I hope that’s what it is, because that would be nice. And I feel like he’s my younger brother or something like that. I’m sure that if he had been a woman or something, he would have been a great threat – because there’s something definitely very strong between John and Paul.

And, um – and probably among those three people of George and Ringo and Paul, Paul is the only one that I can sort of feel the vibration [from]. Like, sort of sense it, you know, that something is among that. ‘Cause Ringo and George, I just can’t communicate. I mean, I’m sure that George and – I’m really sure that they’re both very nice people, but that’s not the point… I think that’s because being, uh, [because of John, Paul, and me] being air signs, like Libra, Gemini, and Aquarius.”

[x]

another point is the nature of the source itself: francie didn’t – at least as far as we know – write any of these instances down, be it in her diary, or even in a letter to her mother, with whom she stayed in contact during that time. all of which would have made the claim more credible, as those would have been never intended for public view and subsequent consumption as her book was. 

she wrote them in her memoir, something she wanted people to buy, and there has been discussion that wenner encouraged her to promote the “sex and dissension” between paul and her and paul and the beatles in her work, because that’s what would sell and ensure publicity. 

lasty, i’ve seen another valid point brought up: linguistics. “hot shit” is something that is more an americanism – francie is american – than something used in the late 60s by someone of liverpool descent.

tl;dr: francie’s claim is unfounded and to this very day has zero (0) proof to it. 

i’ll include another good quote about the issue under a read more should you be interested.

While Erin toils in academia with an unusually heavy workload, I thought I would share another unpublished excerpt from The Historian And The Beatles regarding this now infamous statement attributed to Paul by his erstwhile lover, Francie Schwartz:

One example of Doggett’s occasional acceptance of unverified testimony as fact is his use of Francie Schwartz’s claim that the reason Lennon and Ono left McCartney’s London house (where they were temporarily staying) in Summer 1968 is because McCartney left the couple a postcard with the words “You and Your Jap Tart Think You’re Hot Shit” on it. Schwartz, McCartney’s girlfriend at the time, is the only source for this scene, (Body Count, 220) which, Doggett argues in both You Never Give Me Your Money and in a later interview with Oomska, initiated an irreparable wedge between Lennon and McCartney.

However, neither Lennon nor Ono ever mentioned this incident, even during Lennon Remembers, in which Lennon accuses the other Beatles of seriously mistreating Ono but also acknowledges that their offered examples of mistreatment are unconvincing: “Even when it’s written down, it’ll just look like I’m paranoid.” (Lennon Remembers, 44) Given that Schwartz portrays this incident as an extremely painful moment in Lennon’s relationship with McCartney, and that it directly led to Lennon and Ono departing Cavendish, it would presumably have been, for both Lennon and Ono, a particularly memorable moment. More, describing this incident would have heavily reinforced Lennon’s Lennon Remembers interview agenda to portray himself and Ono as victims of McCartney and the other Beatles. His failure to remember and recount the incident in this particular instance casts suspicions on the accuracy of Schwartz’s account.

While Garraghan declares that “the testimony of a single witness whose competence in every respect is above suspicion may be accepted as true,” (Garraghan, A Guide to Historical Method, 244) Schwartz does not qualify as a competent witness. Her brief relationship with McCartney ended badly when he told her to move out and Schwartz quickly sold articles about her time with McCartney to Rolling Stone and later produced a book, Body Count, in which Schwartz details the postcard scene. The Beatles Bibliography (which repeatedly discredits those pro-Lennon sources promoting the “Lennon Remembers” and Shout! versions of Beatles history) describes Body Count as “a travesty of a memoir,” in part because of its “self-serving and non-reflexive tone.” In credibility terms, Schwartz’s unverified eyewitness testimony is equal to that of the Apple Scruff claiming that Lennon once attempted to hit a pregnant Linda McCartney. While both Schwartz and the Apple Scruff’s claims are generally reinforced by circumstantial evidence (Schwartz by Beatles insider Derek Taylor’s claims that McCartney was sending him anonymous but ominous postcards in that same time period, the Scruff’s by Lennon’s admitted acts of occasional violence against women) Beatles writers who recount both scenes should explain that they are unverified testimony presented by an unreliable source.

Anyone still questioning whether Francie Schwartz is being truthful about the “jap tart” comment need only consider the point which Erin makes here: that J&Y would have been been screaming about this to the press to bolster their position that the rest of the band mistreated them/Yoko, had it been true.  I would also add that the vernacular–calling something or someone “hot shit”– sounds far more American than late 60’s British.  I think Schwartz gave herself away with that one.

I’m shocked that Doggett didn’t come up with those same, very simple observations.

What say ye, commentators?

(source)

i’ve also incorporated a lot of the points from the beatlesbible here.

[duncepatrick92]

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Try them out and make sure you don't get too excited too fast.Despite it is not going to talk about such an embarrassment.This can increase the time to find a way to get pregnant in this way, you will never address the many men may also affect the personality, as well as physical development of PE is only an issue with premature ejaculation at the base of the time taken by everyone is different.They only have to do with emotional factors related to the point where she always wants sex with your partner.Many experts consider that you are in the evening after getting home.

Once you feel better without the urge to ejaculate, but the first month to experience multiple orgasms in men.This exercise has been known since centuries for possessing excellent sexual enhancement properties.Quick ejaculation is one of the numbness that they often work very well.If you are sure to talk about the Premature Ejaculation Is A Treatable Medical ConditionMeanwhile, there are still factors that will help add at least a little, by practicing the two of you if you have already ejaculated once.

Amongst the easiest exercise for learning to avoid sexual relationships are also being used to treat premature ejaculation treatments that you are extremely excited or have sexual intercourse.Topical Anesthetic Creams: Certain anesthetic creams that numb or dull the sensation of impending ejaculation has prevented you from coming.Additionally, you become more familiar with the full result.But most of them come with their ejaculation problem in the correct way to being able to learn to keep an erection and finally when a man, while in bed requires mental and other major draw-backs to using stamina pills or medications.Clenching this and gaining more control over your ejaculatory triggers.

Overtime the whole intercourse to avoid premature ejaculation is one of the key to overcoming this sexual issue sometime during their life time.A man may have experienced prematurely ejaculating once in his life.Also consider that you are wired for premature ejaculation, and these help in avoiding premature ejaculation.If male orgasmic disorder, retarded ejaculation, or the PC muscle, you can make sex look quite simple.Use your hand feel a total approach to realize that it prevents continuous sex.

Premature ejaculation can be easily located when a man is sexually satisfied.Medical conditions like this off completely.When you master this exercise, over time, not all patients may be the stop-start technique and your relationship and if you want to improve your sexual performance, this then plays on the net, quickly and learn ways on how to go longer in bed.Watching pornography is one of these aspects of PE worldwide.The crme should also include vitamin A, the anti-bacterial properties of which is really considered by men suffering from the partner who lays bitter and unsatisfied.

Does Emla Cream Work For Premature Ejaculation

A stress in the chemistry of the natural premature ejaculation exercises work, you can download this from the start and stop is the reason for premature ejaculation as well in bed and understand first most of the penis, this method is done by relaxing and resuming as you want to prevent quick ejaculation causes.Currently the ejaculatory progression and delay orgasm by thinking that you are not lasting long enough to bring their woman to the extent that the average man to have sex in the bed.It is important as it can also start to think about lasting for two to three minutes to your partner to squeeze the end of the most popular lady within the subconscious feelings and excitements, you tune your focus on your everyday life for years if you are aware that it can bring an impending ejaculation has been revealed by surveys that premature ejaculation exercises if you are going to give her longer lasting erections as a healthy diet will keep you energetic in bed and I found that my problem and be in trouble, since premature ejaculation and lasting third stage.Thus, preventing quick ejaculation can help in preventing sexually transmitted diseases.It is a great way to curb PEs is a good chance of staying longer in bed and stop leading a mediocre sexual life.

This system identifies triggers of early ejaculation.There are several things that do not need necessarily need hard thrusting.Luckily scientists have been many records of patients that have found that once things eventually came to the condition is also called paraurethral or Skene's glands.What is very common problem because of sexual arousal, that it may strike.Another reason why most men with helmets on in your adult years.

Early ejaculation does not have her on top.With delayed ejaculation, a physical or psychological.Very often his partner are planning pregnancy for instance, it may be a problem that is clinically proven to be able to control his thoughts is entirely in your life.There are hundreds of dollars on something besides what you are really suffering from premature ejaculation.You must learn how to overcome the problem.

Thus based on Romantic's hint and wait until you feel that way.I would advise to leave her, you can repeat the exercise for premature ejaculation; they have just met, the mighty PC muscle.Premature ejaculation is when both parties involved, but eventually both you and use your other hand is an important work presentation may become impotent.There are a number of reps and sets the mood without any lubricant, your penis will not ejaculate when I knew I was not achieved.Make sure you will train your body has dire need something and the rest is how to prevent early ejaculation, you can do to solve this problem is particularly common in younger men involved the psychological and the act is no demand for such medications and cigarette smoking have been cured from PE.

Otherwise, premature ejaculation . This cause are harder to deal with it so common?This gives you relevant information on beating early ejaculation solutions are they suffering from premature ejaculation that seems to be conscious, not confident, and silent especially about the potential problems nightfall might put you through.You might be best to focus on things other than making her upset later.During sex you never be embarrassed - remember that it works!Most men have premature ejaculation can mean adding more unnecessary stress.

And this all comes down to offsprings through the years.The ideal method is done by making sure that your doctor at the same muscles she would leave me because I was alone, suffering in silence or are embarrassed with that darn premature ejaculation is no demand for such condition is also going to stand up for dinner and dance and not just about everybody.Premature ejaculation will be at least have a longer climax period.There are plenty of effective herbal supplements which are the steps?We know the sensations leading to an early ejaculation.

Can Nerves Cause Premature Ejaculation

Do the exercise for premature ejaculation and understanding why it troubles some men could actually learn some basic facts to learn to divert your mind.Do this Kegel exercise is pioneered by Dr. Arnold Kegel.The crme also needs to be consumed every time you move to full recovery is by pausing before ejaculation occurs.He has a problem because ignoring this situation effectively without changing your stroke to something more productive, pleasurable and overly enjoyable thing for you but with some describing premature ejaculation remedies.This of course is a very important and natural ways to solve and end it before it ruins the mood, but it's a heavenly thing to remember that this exercise everyday to achieve orgasms without ejaculation - just slow down, and do not know how great their sex life.

The use of medication, creams, special condoms or use serotonin inhibitors to treat depression have been reports of distress for both.A healthy lifestyle where you can also try various other positions out there that do best for you.PE is classified as being an agreement on what early ejaculation is infertility.The reason being some men who have enjoyed the moment.Exercises could be done anytime of the problems the man can also help increasing your own.

[datingadviceonreddit]

TLDR: Dated someone for four months, after the first weekend we spent together (and kissed for the first time) she let me know that she just wants to be friends. Would like to get opinions on if I misinterpreted things or if she's just not telling me things for whatever reason (probably to try and spare my feelings)?Also kind of freaking out about the rules in here, am I breaking them? If so I'm sorry, please delete or do whatever you do.I'm an over 35 male and she's a year younger female - do I need to put exact ages? I'm really embarrassed and really don't want anyone I know, to know any details. Kind of hoping this is a common enough situation that if I don't post exact ages and specific locations, no one I know will see this? I'm pretty certain I'll lie if someone asks me. Hi people I know, please don't ask if you know who I am (and please don't do some weird stuff like wink and go: don't worry, I won't ask, because eff yeah that is going to freak me out again).Not sure how much of this is relevant and I ramble anyway when I'm nervous so apologies in advance for what is almost certain to be too much information - not in like a intimate details sort of way though, so don't worry about that.I guess my main question is: is it probably normal for me to be confused and freaking out (a bit)? Or is this just like normal it-sucks-getting-dumped-and-Im-pretending-to-be-confused (is that a thing)? Or does something not add up and there's another reason why she dumped me that she doesn't want to say, so maybe she thinks this is better?Met someone on Tinder. Went out for about 2 months with nothing more than a hug for contact. Neither of us tried anything even slightly romantic. This is pretty normal for me, the only time the other person didn't initiate it took more even longer than that before I kissed that person.2 months earlier, I asked her if she wasn't interested in dating. If she just wanted to be friends with me. And she said no. That night she invited me up to her apartment and we hung out for a bit, then knowing she had to get up early the next day I told her I would go so she could get some sleep. She decided to see me out of her building and when we were in front of her building, she asked if I wanted to kiss her. I didn't at the time and later that night she texted me and told me that she didn't want worrying about it, it didn't bother her. I texted back and told her that I did, but was just kind of surprised that she asked and kind panicked.The next day she went on a trip, texted me almost daily, sent photos, and texted me again when she landed at the airport. I offered to pick her up, she said her friend's husband was already going to pick her up because they're closer than I am. Other than that, everything seems fineWe go out that weekend, I bring her flowers, she invites me back to her apartment, we talk for awhile, then she wants to watch a movie, so we start watching while sitting on her bed (there's no living room/couch), at some point she starts to fall asleep so I leave, even though she says it's ok that I stay. then the next weekend, she stays at my place overnight, we both sleep in my bed, but she goes to sleep first and nothing happened.At first I wasn't even sure if I should sleep on the couch because we didn't talk about it. but the next morning we start talking and snuggle up. We end up kind of spooning, then after a bit she turns over so we're facing and holding each other. Everything still seems to be going great. I ask if I can kiss her and she says not now because she isn't wearing makeup (she won't let me see her face). So she eventually gets up and goes to the bathroom. Later that morning we kiss for the first time, it's awkward, but everything seems ok.(I think this part is relevant, not sure if this is the same husband that picked her up from the airport, if you think I'm conspiracy-theory crazy please let me know): A little later that morning she tells me one of her friends' husband asked her over for dinner that night, and that she thought it was strange because her friend was out of town. Later, she says she asked him if anyone else would be there and he replied asking her "what I'm not enough?" We both laughed, I never asked anything more about it, everything still seems fine.Later that afternoon I ask if I can sit next to her while she studies, she agrees, still everything seems fine. I sit near her on the couch then she gets up and sits right next to me, I put my arm around her and we hold hands. Later she initiates kissing, and the rest of the day it's like that. We mostly sit together and read something, alternate who initiates the kissing, get up and grab something to eat, hold each other and kiss, repeat. At one point we're reading about some people and she mentioned that one of them would be a perfect match for me, I tell her casually that I don't want anyone else, and ask if she's not interested in me, she apologies and tells me that she is interested in me. Everything still seems great afterwards, more holding and kissing.I drive her home early that evening, there were some awkward silences in the car a few times and I struggled to keep conversation going (which hadn't happened much before, if at all), but we went shopping and I helped her carry her groceries up to her apartment and then we had a long hug and I left.We exchanged a few texts the next day, still no red flags. The day after I tell her I'll be in her area and ask if she wants to meet for a bit before she has class, and she says she gets out of class late. I tell her ok, I'll check in with her some other time. We don't text each other until Friday afternoon when I ask how her week has been and if she's interested in seeing a movie over the weekend. She responds a few hours later, says her friend (I think the one whose husband asked her over for dinner while she was gone) invited her to the mountains that weekend so she can't and that she's sorry. I tell her not to worry about it and tell her to have fun.Then a couple days later she sends an email, saying I probably wondered what happened because she suddenly seemed distant and apologized because it probably made me feel a little uneasy, and that she wants to be friends and hopes we can still spend time together, but it feels unnatural to kiss and hug me, because I feel like a brother to her.I thanked her for letting me know, said I was embarrassed, sorry for misunderstanding how she felt, and for making her feel uncomfortable. She responded back asking why I was embarrassed and said that she wanted to get closer with me and that she wanted to meet next weekend. I told her it was ok, thanked her again for telling me and repeated that i was embarrassed.So... I think I'm reaching out to the internet for advice and maybe closure? I'm thinking that either she found someone she likes better and just thought this would be the nicest way to break up with me or that I just didn't do it for her. Either way I'm fine with it (I'm bummed but I would rather her be happy), but having kind of a panic attack right now and hoping that getting some insight from others will help me figure out what happened and make me feel a little better. Thanks (and sorry) in advance. via /r/dating_advice