#also really like ​my boy breaks his toys / the black dog / the prophecy

[ivymp3]

finallyyyyyy listened to ttpd in full…… welcome back red (2012)

[drvscarlett]

The Tortured Drivers' Department

— combining another one of my favorites. I'll be taking notes and writing fics about which TTPD song do I associate with the drivers ( + I will be including the retired ones). This is the main list and I'll be linking them when I finished writing them. Let me know if you wanna be tagged

Also give TTPD a listen. Its so beautiful and a masterpiece

Fortnight

— i love you, its ruining my life (Lewis Hamilton x Mercedes!reader)

The Tortured Poets Department 

— At dinner you take my ring off my middle finger and put it on the one people put wedding rings on. And that's the closest I've come to my heart exploding (Pierre Gasly x ex!reader)

My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys 

— 'Cause he took me out of my box, stole my tortured heart left all these broken parts (Lando Norris x reader)

Down Bad

— Fuck it if I can't have him (Charles Leclerc x kpop idol!reader)

So Long, London

— You swore that you loved me, but where were the clues? (George Russell x secret girlfriend! reader)

But Daddy I Love Him

— "I'm having his baby" No, I'm not, but you should see your faces (Alex Albon x Horner!reader)

Fresh Out the Slammer

— Now, pretty baby, I'm runnin' back home to you (Esteban Ocon x childhood bestfriend!reader)

Florida!!! (feat. Florence + the Machine) 

—I need to forget, so take me to Florida (Logan Sargeant x heiress!reader)

Guilty as Sin?

—What if he's written "mine" on my upper thigh only in my mind? (Oscar Piastri x bestfriend!reader)

Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me?

— I was tame, I was gentle till the circus life made me mean (Nico Rosberg x Lewis Hamilton)

I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can)

— they shake their heads, saying, "God help her" when I tell 'em he's my man (Daniel Ricciardo x longtime girlfriend!reader)

loml

— Oh, what a valiant roar. What a bland goodbye. The coward claimed he was a lion (Max Verstappen x childhood sweetheart!reader)

I Can Do It With a Broken Heart 

— Lights, camera, bitch, smile (Zhou Guanyu x model!reader)

The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived

— And I'll forget you, but I'll never forgive (Yuki Tsunoda x Actress!reader)

The Alchemy

—'Cause the sign on your heart said it's still reserved for me (Kimi Räikkönen x assistant!reader)

Clara Bow

— This town is fake, but you're the real thing (Sebastian Vettel x Ferrari heir!reader)

The Black Dog

— I am someone who, until recent events you shared your secrets with (Mick Schumacher x driver!reader

imgonnagetyouback

— I'm an Aston Martin that you steered straight into the ditch (Fernando Alonso x wife!reader)

The Albatross

— She's the albatross, she is here to destroy you (Jenson Button x revenger!reader)

Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus

—So if I sell my apartment and you have some kids with an internet starlet. Will that make your memory fade from this scarlet maroon? (Carlos Sainz x Vasseur!reader)

How Did It End?

— The deflation of our dreaming leaving me bereft and reeling (Logan Sargeant x Oscar Piastri)

So High School

—You knew what you wanted, and, boy, you got her (Charles Leclerc x reader ft Max Verstappen x childhood friend!reader)

I Hate It Here

—I hate it here so I will go to secret gardens in my mind (Kimi Räikkönen x interviewer! reader)

thanK you aIMee

— And then she wrote headlines in the local paper laughing at each baby step I'd take (Mark Webber x reader)

I Look in People’s Windows

—What if your eyes looked up and met mine one more time (Sebastian Vettel x reader)

The Prophecy

—Don't want money, just someone who wants my company (Pierre Gasly x politician's daughter!reader)

Cassandra

—So they killed Cassandra first cause she feared the worst (Lewis Hamilton x wife!reader)

Peter

— Forgive me, Peter, please know that I tried to hold onto the days when you were mine (Lando Norris x reader)

The Bolter

— "Oh, we must stop meeting like this" (Max Verstappen x hollywood starlet!reader)

Robin

— You have no room in your dreams for regrets (Oscar Piastri x girlfriend!reader)

The Manuscript

—One last souvenir from my trip to your shores. Now and then I re-read the manuscript. But the story isn't mine anymore (Carlos Sainz x McLaren employee!reader)

[st4rgzer]

THE TORTURED POETS DEPARTMENT: THE ANTHOLOGY

—> spencer reid

coming soon…

Fortnight…

-in which your unlawful affair with fbi agent spencer reid must come to an end, instead, a revelation is made.

The Tortured Poets Department…

-despite your complicated relationship with spencer reid, you need him, and you know he needs you.

My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys

-in which you dismiss all the warnings from your friends, but who could deny spencer reid when his eyes light up every time he sees you, like a new toy.

Down Bad

-in which passion takes a form of frustration when you can’t have what you want, the object of your adoration being spencer reid.

So Long, London

-a withering relationship you can’t stop from fading which you decide shall come to an end.

But Daddy I Love Him

-your parents worries of you becoming an fbi agent increase when they find out who your heart desires.

Fresh Out The Slammer

-a night in prison bring out a realization about who’s arms you wanted to run into, fresh out the slammer.

Guilty as Sin?

-fantasies in your head start manifesting and interrupting your life, and spencer reid can tell.

Who's Afraid of Little Old Me?

-your rivalry with dr. spencer reid reaches a near end when he takes it too far (burntout!reader).

I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can)

-you try and trick yourself into thinking a relationship with spencer reid won’t crash and burn…but what if it doesn’t? (postprison!reid).

‎loml

-you thought it was perfect, everything with spencer reid was new and familiar at the same time. what are you supposed to do when it ends?

I Can Do It With A Broken Heart

-profiler spencer reid can see behind your big bright eyes and witty remarks, yearningto know where your mind goes when you’re alone, when you’re not surrounded by people.

The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived

-in an unfortunate series of events, spencer reid betrays you. he threw everything away, and for what? you decide to see him one last time.

The Alchemy

-in which the undeniable chemistry between you and spencer doesn’t go unnoticed by anyone.

Clara Bow

-…?

*********

summary pending…

The Black Dog

​​imgonnagetyouback

The Albatross

Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus

How Did It End?

So High School

I Hate It Here

​​thanK you aIMee

I Look in People's Windows

The Prophecy

Cassandra

Peter

The Bolter

Robin

The Manuscript

a/n: if anyone has any ideas for any of these fics, please share! this is long asf ik but just bare with me. also took “florida!!!” of cause i had no idea what to write for that one

[fairylights-throughthemist]

Eddie Munson as tracks on The Tortured Poets Department by Taylor Swift

Fortnight

Exhusband!Eddie x Jealous!Reader

The Tortured Poets Department

Friends to Lovers to Strangers with Eddie

My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys

Toxic!Mean!Eddie x Reader

Down Bad

Protective!Mafia!Eddie x Reader

So Long, London

Exboyfriend!Rockstar!Eddie x Reader

(Eddie and Reader have spent lots of time in London during their relationship. Now that it’s ended she never wants to return.)

But Daddy I Love Him

Dad’s Best Friend!Eddie / Older!Eddie x Reader

Fresh Out The Slammer

Ex-Con!Eddie x Reader

Florida!!!

Rockstar!Eddie x Reader

(Reader’s [now ex]boyfriend cheated on her, she went to Florida on vacation to forget about him. At a local bar she meets a certain rockstar touring the country with his band.)

Guilty As Sin?

Exboyfriend!Eddie x Reader

(Eddie broke up with you, yet you can’t stop thinking about him. Not even with another man in your bed.)

Who’s Afraid Of Little Old Me?

Rockstar!Eddie x Reader

(Eddie and Reader just made their relationship official and his fans can’t seem to keep their mouths shut. Haters online compare you to other women he’s been seen with, they make comments about your body and they don’t think you deserve Eddie.) (This description also fits for Delicate from Reputation.)

I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can)

Mafia!Eddie x Catholic / Virgin / Good Girl / Shy! Reader

loml

Exboyfriend!Eddie x Reader

The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived

Situationship!Mean!Toxic!Eddie x Reader

The Alchemy

Hockey player!Eddie x Reader

Clara Bow

Rockstar!Eddie x Actress!Reader

(Reader always getting compared to other actresses, everyone wants her to be bigger and better than anyone before her. Eddie being the only one able to comfort her.)

The Black Dog

Exboyfriend!Eddie x Reader

imgonnagetyouback

Exboyfriend!Rockstar!Eddie x Jealous!Reader

The Albatross

Virgin!Eddie x “Slut”!Reader

Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus

Rockstar!Eddie x Reader

(Eddie becoming addicted to drugs, reader trying to help him but giving up when he cheats on her.)

How Did It End?

Rockstar!Eddie x Reader

(No one caring about how you’re doing, only asking about Eddie and asking what happened.)

So High School

Best Friends to Lovers, Eddie x Reader

(Eddie and Reader playing Kiss, Marry, Kill while high, Reader naming people when it’s Eddie’s turn, one of them being herself, leading her to ask “Are you gonna marry, kiss or kill me?”)

Read the fic here!

I Hate It Here

Eddie x You

(Yes you. We all know you read to escape reality.)

thanK you aIMee

Eddie x Reader

(Based on the title, not the lyrics)

(Think All Of The Girls You Loved Before, Reader thanking one of Eddie’s exes for contributing to the amazing man he is now.)

I Look In People’s Windows

Exboyfriend!Eddie x Reader

The Prophecy

Eddie x Reader

(Post Vecna…)

Cassandra

Toxic!Rockstar!Eddie x Reader

(Reader watching Eddie’s show in the pit and getting sexually harassed / groped by some creep. Not wanting to interrupt the show or cause a scene, she keeps quiet. Anxiety and stress leading up to a breakdown, Eddie being high out of his mind asking if everything’s okay. You snap at him and tell him about the incident at his concert but he doesn’t believe you. The day after your breakdown, Eddie asks you what happened last night, after a quick recap of the events your petty boyfriend chooses not to believe you.)

Peter

Exboyfriend!Rockstar!Eddie x Reader

(Similar to Who’s Afraid Of Little Old Me. Eddie being ignorant and giving half assed advice like “Just ignore it”. He doesn’t show how much he cares due to his newfound love for drugs.)

The Bolter

Eddie x Reader

(Reader being afraid of relationships and attachment. Her trying to bolt from Eddie’s love but he doesn’t let her. Steve and Robin being supportive of Reader and Eddie’s relationship, they felt the need to tell him about her attachment style before it was too late.)

Robin

Dad!Eddie x Mom!Reader

The Manuscript

Exboyfriend!Eddie x Reader

A/N: This is my first time writing anything so please be nice !!!!

[my-castles-crumbling]

cas review of ttpd?

Ah yes! I am finally ready!

Cas's Review of TTPD that Two (2) People Asked For (so now you all get a fucking essay)

Literally, this is growing to be one of my favorite albums. Like...I appreciate Taylor most for her lyrics and I wrote down seven pages of them in my notebook of lyrics that fucking killed me. I feel like it's a more mature version of folklore, which is exactly what I was hoping for.

I really liked the promo for this album- the lyrics being spread, the phases of grief, the entire thing was so well-done. And the double album drop left me literally screaming.

I feel like the order of the songs on the album is also super well thought out. It really tells a story and I could feel her going through the phases, especially in the first half of the album.

I thought it was cool that she definitely took some risks in the album, but most of them landed 1000%. So many of the cool things done with the lyrics, melody, and tempo were amazing and kept me interested.

I'm gonna start by listing the more specific things I didn't like because there's only three:

In the song "Fresh Out The Slammer" during the outro, the change in beat was very jarring. I LOVED the rest of the song and it just ruined it for me

Florida!!! was...a choice. I get it. The concept of going away somewhere after a breakup to get over it is great. But Florida? Like...c'mon. Also "fuck me up Florida" made me cringe.

The line in "I Hate It Here" about racists...god, I have two minds about it. I don't think there was winning with that one, and I think people are going to tear her apart for it without taking it in context. Like when you take it in the bigger picture of the song, it makes sense. But when you take it in just the few lines...it feels a bit like it's trivializing the fact that literal slavery existed during that time? So yeah. I go back and forth...

And now a song ranking and my feelings about some of the songs:

Guilty As Sin? - This song has been in my head ever since I heard it. It's perfect, it's everything.

I Can Do It With a Broken Heart - This is giving DBATC (favorite taylor song) vibes and I am so in love. It destroyed me.

Who's Afraid of Little Old Me? - This is an ANTHEM. This will be screamed in the shower. This is so powerful.

But Daddy I Love Him - This was just so nostalgic. Like it gave Fearless Taylor and I loved it so much. Also the jumpscare fucking SHOOK me.

So Long, London - This was like a companion to You're Losing Me and god, it was amazingly hurtful.

loml - I just love slow, sad Taylor. and the twist at the end? ugh

I Hate It Here - Questionable line aside, this song was 15/10 relatable as a fanfic reader/writer

imgonnagetyouback - I feel like this will be a single.

The Prophecy - ouch

The Alchemy - Awww, so cute!

I Look In People's Windows

I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can)

The Albatross

The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived - god she CAME for this man.

The Black Dog

Down Bad - I also feel like this will be a single

Fresh Out the Slammer

How Did It End?

My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys

TTPD

Cassandra - hahahaha whoops, we're coming for Kim again?

thanK you aIMee - and again? that line about her mom was AMAZING

So High School - adorable

Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus

Fortnight - she and Post Malone work so well together

The Bolter

The Manuscript

Peter

Robin

Clara Bow

Florida!!

What do you all think?

[folkwhore1998]

I just don't understand...

how you don't miss me in the black dog

I had no idea what to expect with this album. Taylor's brand is "never let them know your next move"

So, was it going to be more of a folklore/evermore/red vibe? Or was it going to be pop in the way midnights was? I did not think it was going to be straight up pop, but you just never know. I don't have cable so it can be really hard for me to watch award shows in real time, so I pulled a few strings so I could stream the grammys and thank god I did. I could not believe the album announcement and I was honestly gagged about the whole thing.

Now... This is a devastatingly beautiful album and is so vulnerable and raw.

The Prophecy... she literally said "I will go bankrupt. I will give up everything because I am hurting so much I need someone to tell me things are going to be okay and I don't care what I have to do to get this confirmation/assurance. I just want someone to love me the way I love them and I don't care about the superficial things." and she was so real for that.

The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived... the first time I listened to it was like 12:30 AM on album release night/day, and I was yaknow, chilling, listening. and then we hit the bridge... my jaw hit the floor. I literally shot up in bed and was like "holy fuck." when i thought the song was wrapping up, it just kept going. Obviously I had to listen to it again right after it ended. (and I am NOT mad about it. I feel this song in my bones) ((My fiance was also dead asleep during all of this and I made him listen to it at like 10 AM the following day))

(peace: i'll die for you in secret ➜ TSMWEL: i would have died for your sins) ((actually screaming crying vomiting idk))

My favorite part of when she sings this on the eras tour is when she says "hey.. give this message to the smallest man who ever lived" and then turns to the audience and starts singing the bridge. She's like "Yup- heres this message, and another thing- fuck you!" literally incredible. i have an emotional attachment to this song. I could write an essay and honestly, maybe I will.

It's so funny to me because every time Taylor puts out a new album, there are some songs that I hear where i'm like "WOW. This is it. This is the song. She summed up my entire experience in a way I never could. I don't know how much more accurate she could get." And then she comes out with some insane song that keeps the cycle going.

(it's the cycle that keeps on giving and the cycle that keeps me alive! no, seriously. when i was in the hospital at one point in my life, i was asked everyday "and what is something you want to live for?" my answer: my cat and taylor swift's music")

All of this to say... I am so happy I was/am medicated when this album came out.

Here is my ranking of the Tortured Poets Department! (This was incredibly difficult because all of the songs are just so good. Noting that I don't think that any song is a bad song.)

The Black Dog

The Smallest Man

The Prophecy

How Did It End?

Guilty As Sin

My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys

loml (but sometimes it changes places- just depends on the day, but it never goes lower)

Fresh Out The Slammer

But, Daddy I Love Him

Who's Afraid of Little Old Me?

So Long, London

Down Bad

I Can Do It With A Broken Heart

So High School

I Hate It Here

TTPD

Fortnight

Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus

Peter

Cassandra

Flordia!!!

The Alchemy

The Bolter

thanK you aIMee (thank You aimEe)

Clara Bow

The Albatross

The Manuscript

imgonnagetyouback

I Look In People's Windows

Robin

I Can Fix Him (no really I can)

Honorable mentions:

CHILLS

I was so shocked (I watched on a grainy livestream)

When I say I sobbed, I'm not joking. I texted my sister and said "You need to get on this livestream RIGHT NOW.

Check out these small businesses:

Here is the link to a down bad t-shirt: So good for the gym and its a comfort colors t-shirt!

Direct link to the storefront: They have so many cool items!

Check out the link: It's a TTPD vinyl/cd holder and it is actually the coolest thing I've ever seen (I will be purchasing)

Direct link to the storefront: There are a few different options! Check them out!

@taylorswift @taylornation @taylorswift @taylornation

[harlowhockeystick]

i present to you, straight from the tortured poets department...poetic prompts written by the chairman herself.

⎯ send in any one of these poetic prompts, no more than two at a time please, and i will give you a gut wrenching, heart breaking, life giving, fresh air breathing blurb...just as the chairman intended.

sincerely, writer for the tortured poets department anthology specialist

fornight - "i love you, it's ruining my life"

the tortured poets department - "sometimes i wonder if you're gonna screw this up with me"

my boy only breaks his favorite toys - "he was my best friend"

down bad - "fuck it, i was in love"

so long, london - "you'll find someone"

but daddy i love him - "me and my wild boy, and all this wild joy"

fresh out the slammer - "i will never lose my baby again"

florida!!! - "love left me like this and i don't want to exist"

guilty as sin? - "without ever touching his skin, how can i be guilty as sin?"

who's afraid of little old me? - "so tell me everything is not about me"

i can fix him (no really i can) - "trust me, i can handle a dangerous man"

loml - "you said i'm the love of your life, about a million times"

i can do it with a broken heart - "you gotta fake it til you make it"

the smallest man who ever lived - "i don't miss what we had"

the alchemy - "he just comes running over to me"

clara bow - "you're the real thing"

the black dog - "i don't understand how you don't miss me"

imgonnagetyouback - "i can tell when someone wants me"

the albatross - "i'd visit in your dreams"

chloe or sam or sophia or marcus - "if you want to break my cold heart, say you loved me"

how did it end? - "but i still don't know, how did it end?"

so high school - "you knew what you wanted, and boy you got her"

i hate it here - "i'm bitter, but i swear i'm fine"

thanK you aIMee - "i can't forgive the way you made me feel"

i look in people's windows - "does it feel alright not to know me?"

the prophecy - "i'm so afraid i sealed my fate"

cassandra - "that's where i was when i lost it all"

peter - "i thought it was just goodbye for now"

the bolter - "oh, we must stop meeting like this"

robin - "you'll learn to bounce back"

the manuscript - "i'm not a donor, but i'd give you my heart if you needed it"

p.s. you can find in my directory, the list roster of different men i'll write poems for. please refer to that only, if you would. here is the link <3 oh, and send your requests here. you may also request from my au list, which is found here. that's all for now. see you when it's time to write about heartbreaking princes and screaming from tall towers.

⎯ j

[lunar-years]

okay now that it's been a week+, I can humbly offer you my comprehensive list of all the ttpd songs I have somehow managed to make about Ted Lasso...

The Tortured Poets Department - Look, unfortunately...this is a BeardJane manifesto | “I chose this cyclone with you / and who’s gonna hold you like me?”

My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys - RoyKeeley breakup anthem:( | “he saw forever so he smashed it up” :(

Down Bad- s3 Keeley (and RoyKeeley + JackKeeley) | “how dare you think it’s romantic / leaving me safe and stranded”

Fresh Out the Slammer - Jamie returning to Richmond from Manchester/LCA with a side of JamieKeeley (he came back to richmond FOR HER!! idk. if you get you get it) | “camera flashes, welcome bashes, toss the ashes off a ledge”

Guilty As Sin? - RoyJamie. Enough said. | “I keep these longings locked in lower case inside a vault”

I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can) - s1 JamieKeeley | “good boy, that’s right. I can show you heaven if you’ll be an angel <3”

I Can Do It With a Broken Heart - Jamie. | “All the pieces of me shattered as the crowd was chanting MORE!”

The Alchemy - RoyJamie. Based on vibes alone, tbh. | “These blokes warm the benches / we’ve been on a winning streak” :)

Clara Bow - Admittedly this one is only very vaguely applicable from lyrics alone. but thematically...it is giving Roy's journey from seeing Jamie as the threat of someone new and bright and young taking his place to eventually becoming his guiding light and warning and source of encouragement and another fan all in one. | "take the glory, give everything"

The Black Dog - okay, hear me out. Think of bartender Rebecca. Think of Rupert going back to that bar after the divorce with one of his new young flings. Think of Rebecca tracking his location. yeah! | "you said I needed a brave man, then proceeded to play him until I believed it too"

How Did It End? - Another RoyKeeley tragic breakup song :I Specifically considering they have a lot of the same friends, coworkers etc., all of whom were completely shocked by the breakup and surely ALL asking the two of them what had gone wrong, because it was so unbelievable! they seemed like such a fairytale romance! | "But I still don't know, how did it end?"

imgonnagetyouback - royjamiekeeley <3:) THEY ARE ALL THIS MESSY ABOUT EACH OTHER!! | "you'll find that you were never not mine."

The Prophecy - REBECCA. God this is THE Rebecca song. is this not the whole s3 psychic plot? I mean. come on. | "Don't want money, just someone who wants my company."

Cassandra - Also Rebecca i fear. FUCK the haters!!! | "They say 'what doesn't kill you makes you aware.' What happens if it becomes who you are?"

Robin - TED & HENRY. and a bit roy & phoebe but idk I like it most for Ted and Henry. | "The time will arrive for the cruel and the mean / you'll learn to bounce back just like your trampoline"

[stumbleonhometomycats]

Hi! This may be a bit of a foolish question, but since we’re both tog girlies, what TTPD songs represent certain characters and couples/ships to you? You can choose any character or ship, but I kindly ask you to include Aelin and Rowan, and Rowaelin🥺.

My dear friend I am so sorry that this took me forever. I have been jotting down thoughts for weeks and finally today was able to really compile them. I ended up assigning every song to someone because I was having fun.

Would love any additions or suggestions from anyone who has read the series!

So with out further ado, TTPD songs as Throne of Glass Characters:

Fortnight Chaol pov during Heir of Fire and the beginning of Queen of Shadows 

The Tortured Poets Department This was quite literally the hardest one for me, like maaaaaybe a little bit giving me Chaol and Nesryn at the beginning of Tower of Dawn???? Maaaaaybe Kaltain in the first book

My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys Chaol is the boy who is always breaking his favorite toys  But also Maeve is the boy breaking all her favorite toys (The Cadre)

Down Bad Lorcan at the beginning of Kingdom of Ash

So Long, London I can see this a few ways, mainly Aelin shedding her Celaena skin and leaving Rifthold. Also, Nesryn and Chaol’s paths diverging when they are in Antica. A little more of a stretch, but The Cadre leaving Wendlyn to serve Aelin. 

But Daddy I Love Him Elide being in love with Lorcan against literally everyone’s wishes 

Fresh Out The Slammer Stay with me, “I’ll bleed whatever color you tell me to”. Essentially, Dorian being so in love with Manon he breaks his mind control 

Florida!!! Skull’s Bay is Florida, so I guess this is Captain Rolfe’s song 

Guilty As Sin? Aelin / Rowan in QoS while they were dancing around being fully in love with each other and while Rowan was trying to maintain his flimsy boundaries 

Who's Afraid Of Little Old Me? Aelin / Lysandra / Kaltain / Yrene / ABRAXOS

I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can) Dorian about Manon 

loml This can go a couple ways, if you focus on the loss of it all : Gavriel, The Thirteen, Asterin’s farmer and child, Sam Cortland, Sorscha, Nehemiah, Aelin’s parents, Rowan’s fake mate, etc.  But if you focus on how horrible the guy being song about is: Aelin about Arobynn 

I Can Do It With A Broken Heart This song sooooo specifically makes me think of the “I’m so tired, Rowan” scene in Kingdom of Ash

The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived AROBYNN HAMEL 

The Alchemy Aelin and Rowan, obviously. Specifically the gold nightgown. 

Clara Bow Aelin / Lysandra / Evangeline / Elena

The Black Dog Stay with me….. Chaol and Dorian when they were nawt seeing eye to eye 

imgonnagetyouback Lorcan about Maeve? LOL 

The Albatross The Thirteen as a whole, but super specifically Manon. Also perhaps how Dorian views himself after the end of Heir of Fire and all of Queen of Shadows

Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus Sam about Celaena 

How Did It End? Could go Chapter 99 of Kingdom of Ash  Could go Sam Cortland 

So High School Fenrys 

I Hate It Here Yrene in Assassin’s Blade? 

thanK you aIMee I guess it could be about Arobynn??? The King of Adarlan??? Elena??? 

I Look in People's Windows Aelin in KOA knowing what she has to do and what she stands to lose  Also Lysandra before Queen of Shadows

The Prophecy Rowan, gods it is sooooo Rowan. And very Aelin as well. It is them separately and together. With a sprinkling of Elena having to spend an eternity watching the consequences of her actions unfold

Cassandra BABA YELLOWLEGS? Kind of Nehemiah and Elena??? And the general just not being believed or listened to is obviously Aelin

Peter Vaughan HAHAHAHAH  But also from the pov of the mortal man Asterin’s loved 

The Bolter I MEAN THE OPENING LINES….IT IS AELIN……. It’s kind of a beautiful combination of Aelin and Celaena 

Robin Gavriel for Aedion And then Evangeline 

The Manuscript Elena 

[snoopysfriendwoodstock]

what's ur full ttpd song ranking and why?

omg… this will be long lol

1. who’s afraid of little old me? - taylor has tried “female rage” a couple times now and it always falls flat bc she has to be the victor/mastermind of all of it. mad woman & vigilante shit just kinda suck! FINALLY in this song she sort of admits defeat? i find it really interesting to hear her reflecting on her career & her own view of herself and the public perception of her without her feeling the need to throw a “but i’m okay! and actually i’m winning!” in at the end. also the vocals and theatrics are soooo good i just love it <3

2. the smallest man who ever lived - that ENDING. this takes me back to some very classic taylor songs, especially the dear john bridge or last kiss bridge and as a speak now girl i can’t get enough.

3. the prophecy - both people who love this song and people who hate it reduce it down to “she’s sad she doesn’t have a boyfriend” but imo this song perfectly captures the ACHE of being someone who just always has a little ribbon of loneliness running through them. it’s that dark middle of the night place you can’t let yourself go to. and it’s PERFECT.

4. so high school - i don’t have a lot to say here but this is the song she’s talking abt when she says she’s putting narcotics in them. i love it so much. do that impression you did of your dad again ❤️

5. but daddy i love him - i love her delusional ass! also the “i’m having his baby” line is soooo funny sorry!

6. guilty as sin? - there’s a reason this one’s a fan favorite! it’s just soooo good. there’s nothing wrong with a sexy song.

7. so long, london - “i’m just mad as hell cause i loved this place” is such a taylor line. so simply devastating. i think she got away from just very simply stating her emotions/feelings in her newer albums but this song has soooo many lines that go back to that form of writing that she’s so good at. “stopped trying to make him laugh” is another one that really hits.

8. loml - this hits my favorite genre of taylor swift song that is just so sad it’s almost like oh my god you have to stop… what a valiant roar! what a bland goodbye!

9. the black dog - ik i’m kind of a broken record at this point but “i just don’t understand how you don’t miss me” is SOOOO taylor. very early taylor! and i love the idea of taylor swift having someone’s location on her phone. she is sooo pathetic she’s just like me!

10. the bolter - songs used to be STORIES!

11. the alchemy - i can’t explain it. it just scratches my brain really well. i love how it soundssss

12. fresh out the slammer - i LOVE the chorus on this one. and i love when it slows down at the end and gets kinda weird.

13. clara bow - i LOVE this song. i love how haunting it is i love “you look like taylor swift” i love how pessimistic it is as an album closer. it feels like folklore again w/ hoax as the last song. she said we are NOT in change/long live/begin again/clean/new years day/daylight hours anymore we have LOST hope. in fact it’s super interesting compared to change/long live that are all optimistic about the industry/making a name for herself bc now she’s realized there were other taylor swifts before and there will be other taylor swifts later.

14. how did it end? - another just absolute fucking banger of a sad song. the commentary on fame/the public/her fanbase hits.

15. i hate it here - unfortunately this song is sooooo me it’s not even funny.

16. i can do it with a broken heart - who is this “nobody” that doesn’t know she’s miserable? i love this song it’s so funny. “i cry a lot but i am so productive” is a lyric that was necessary for society

17. my boy only breaks his favorite toys - this song grew on me SO much. it’s so pathetic i love it.

18. florida!!! - this song rocks so hard. i think taylor & florence’s voices compliment each other so much

19. the albatross - i love her voice on this one. she’s here to destroy you!!!

20. the tortured poets department - i love this one i’m sorry. i love the sound i love that it feels like she’s trying something new i love how cringe and desperate it is. also lucy dacus mention!

21. peter - i wish i understood this song the way a lot of people do but it’s simply not my favorite! i do love the way she keeps repeating “you said you were gonna grow up then you were gonna come find me” in the chorus. don’t listen to this & never grow up back to back. it’s not funny.

22. down bad - hated this one at first but it has REALLY grown on me. i love the alien abduction metaphor! “i might just die it would make no difference” is like come on girl get up

23. i look in people’s windows - love this one, don’t listen to it much. but never skip when it’s on. her voice is gorgeous and i loveee the writing on it

24. the manuscript - again, i don’t choose to put this one on much but holy shiiiitttt… now she eats kids cereal? and can only sleep if it’s in her mother’s bed?

25. cassandra - i love the idea of this and it has some great lyrics but i feel like she didn’t quite get it off the ground? i love the bridge. it’s like ALMOST there. cassandra is my favorite mythological figure so maybe i just had really high expectations.

26. imgonnagetyouback - this will for sure rise in the rankings soon bc i’m finally getting it. it’s so fun, just not as good as a lot of the anthology tracks.

27. fortnight - i don’t love this one, but the chorus is really catchy. & post malone’s verse is the best part, that gets stuck in my head all the time.

28. thanK you aIMee - god this song is so funny. “everybody knows my mother is a saintly woman but she used to say she wished that you were dead!” i’m just kinda sick of these kind of songs from her if that makes sense?

29. chloe or sam or sophia or marcus - i’m waiting for this one to click!!! i’m sure it will & there’s parts i REALLY like but i skip it every single time

30. robin - i’m sorry it’s a skip from me. it’s beautiful but i’m never ever wanting to hear it. it’s sweet! but not for me

31. i can fix him (no really i can) - idk the rhythm and tempo of this song doesn’t work for me. it sucks bc her voice is so sexy on this one & i love the pathetic aspect but i always skip. it’s not as bad as my least favorite on other albums tho <3

[iguessthisismenow]

Lighting round! TTPD+A Songs, their public meanings and their actual meanings (red text means im unsure):

Fortnight - Matty - Taylor's public and private personas

TTPD - Matty/maybe Joe - Taylor from Karlie's perspective

My Boy Only Breaks His Favourite Toys - Joe breaking Taylor's heart - Joe acting like a child and ruining their bearding contract that started off really good

Down Bad - probably Matty, maybe Joe - Taylor hating bearding and loving Karlie and hating how distant she and Karlie have to be

So Long London - Toe breakup - Taylor being terrified of the power toe held over her relationship(???)

But Daddy I Love Him - Loving Matty (maybe travis?) despite the public hearing him - loving women/karlie despite public opinion that its wrong/mocking the heteronormative ideals she's been slotted into (you should see your faces!!)

Fresh Out The Slammer - idek what the public are supposed to think. Maybe this idea that she was dating Joe while in love with matty?? Who knows. - Her bearding relationships being like prison while she steals as much time with Karlie as she can

Florida - escaping from the drama of her life for a bit - same. Maybe from karlies perspective

Guilty as Sin? - emotionally cheating on Joe with matty - being queer in a society where it's seen as sinful

Who's Afraid of Little Old Me - taylor vs her haters within the entertainment industry

I can fix him (no really I can) - matty?? Maybe travis - another bearding song, this time about Taylor taming a difficult beard / maybe just a fun song she wrote

loml - Joe - maybe karlie and the way they both struggled with bearding

I can do it with a broken heart - taylor performing in one of the biggest tours ever during a breakup - Taylor's betrayal when her masters were sold, her being able to rerecord her albums with stunning success

Smallest man who ever lived - joe / matty - her trust of the man who sold her masters

The Alchemy - Travis - Karlie at the Eras tour

Clara Bow - how women are treated in the music industry

The Black Dog - Joe - no clue

imgonnagetyouback - Joe??? Matty??? - potentially laying the groundwork for getting back together with karlie

The Albatross - Taylor's reputation - the open secret of taylor being queer in the music industry and how that's frowned upon / potentially taylor coming out soon

Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus - Taylor being in love with Matty for 10 years or something - Karlie and Taylor beading and both loathing it / potential set up for kaylor reunion

How did it end? - Taylor being angry at people being nosey over her relationship ending - almost coming out during lover only to be forced back in the closet

So High School - Being in love with travis - openly mocking travis and even the idea that she loves him

I Hate It Here - hating the public eye / rebounding from Joe with matty - hating the public eye / hating bearding

thanK you aIMee - hating Kim K - maybe hating KK, maybe others who are more homophobic

I look in people's windows - losing joe/matty - having to be separate from karlie for bearding / potential kaylor reunion set up

The Prophecy - Taylor wondering if she will ever find love - her wanting to find a place in her career where she can finally come out

Cassandra - the kimye drama - taylor worrying about coming out

Peter - a kid she loved when she was also a kid - the failed coming out

The Bolter - Taylor not being able to commit ?? - not sure, maybe setting up for a kaylor reunion

Robin - THEY HAVE NO IDEA. THEY HAVE NO CLUE. THEY CANNOT EXPLAIN IT. I'VE SEEN PEOPLE SAY ITS ABOUT HER FREAKING CAT - her son! her eldest SON! there is NO other explanation!

The Manuscript - Joe/Matty/maybe Joe Jonas or one of Taylor's old boyfriends who were much older than her - Karlie bearding with Josh

LMK if you want credit for a theory, I'm not sure how a lot of them started :)

[likeadevils]

hi claire! i am so curious on if the story of ttpd was told in order, what order would you put the songs in? like 1. guilty as sin 2. so long, london, 3. but daddy i love him, etc.?

okay so before i start this is not the order i think she wrote it in— for example, i’m pretty sure fortnight was one of the last tracks written. BUT in terms of the story the album is telling

i hate it here

chloe or sam or sophia or marcus

fortnight

guilty as sin?

so long london

how did it end?

the alchemy

fresh out the slammer

the albatross

tortured poets department

but daddy i love him

i can fix him (no really i can)

my boy only breaks his favorite toys

the prophecy

peter

imgonnagetyouback

down bad

i look in peoples windows

the black dog

loml

i can do it with a broken heart

the smallest man who ever lives

but also

the albatross

tortured poets department

my boy only breaks his favorite toys

imgonnagetyouback

fortnight

i hate it here

the prophecy

peter

so long london

loml

how did it end

florida!!!

fresh out of the slammer

i look in peoples windows

the black dog

down bad

i can do it with a broken heart

oh and then also (repeats are intentional)

i hate it here

i look in peoples windows

clara bow

thank you aimee

the albatross

how did it end?

but daddy i love him

who’s afraid of little old me?

i can do it with a broken heart

i hate it here

i look in peoples windows

clara bow

thank you aimee

[oh-my-damn]

TTPD: Ranking

My personal ranking of the songs on The Tortured Poets Department: The Anthology.

I love all the songs on the album!! The sound is very 1989/Midnights for the first half and then quickly shifts into a very Folklore/Evermore vibe in the second half (thank you Aaron Dessner) which I absolutely adore. So all in all, I love the mix of the songs. Some of them I like more than others, however.

The songs, in chronological order, with what I personally rank them on a scale from 1-10 (and technically 13 since a few of them I had to give an even higher score than 10 lol)

Fortnight - 9 stars (Great opening for the album honestly)

The Tortured Poets Department - 8 stars

My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys - 7 stars

Down Bad - 10 stars (this is a fucking banger)

So Long, London - 8 stars

But Daddy I Love Him - 6 stars

Fresh Out The Slammer - 9 stars (my little lawyer heart loves this obvi)

Florida!!! - 9 stars (another banger)

Guilty as Sin? - 7 stars

Who's Afraid of Little Old Me? - 11 stars (this is absolutely fantastic. My fave songs are always when she sings about herself, also why I love Anti-Hero so much. This feels the same to me and I love everything about it)

I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can) - 9 stars (the ending of this one is abosolutely perfect and exactly what I hoped for)

loml - 11 stars (absolutely beautiful piece)

I Can Do It With a Broken Heart - 11 stars (THIS IS AWESOME. We did theories before listening and it lives up exactly to what I had hoped which just felt very, very nice. The song is fun and beautiful and the beat is great and her outtro is just the best thing ever)

The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived - 9 stars (absolutely haunting)

The Alchemy - 9 stars (this was adorable)

Clara Bow - 7 stars

The Black Dog - 7 stars

imgonnagetyouback - 8 stars

The Albatross - 7 stars

Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus - 9 stars

How Did It End? - 8 stars

So High School - 10 stars (This made us all so giddy, I adore it)

I Hate It here - 12 stars (THIS IS PERFECTION. And too relatable honestly)

thanK you aIMee - 10 stars (This was so cunty and I adore it and I heavily relate to Andrea's feelings on Kim K, just saying)

I Look in People's Windows - 8 stars

The Prophecy - 11 stars (BEAUTIFUL. My Folklore heart was SOARING)

Cassandra - 8 stars

Peter - 9 stars

The Bolter - 13 stars (MY FAVORITE ON THE ALBUM. This hit WAY too close to home for me and I legit started sobbing and needed a moment after finishing. This hit me right in the gut. If you don't already know why then you can probably imagine LOL)

Robin - 6 stars

The Manuscript - 10 stars (this was gorgeous, and it definitely made me think about All Too Well and the manuscript for the music video and that made the lyrics even more profound to me)

[cogentranting]

TTPD and Tortured Poets

The Tortured Poets Department applies that title to its subject matter in a variety of ways that I would like to sort into four categories:

Tortured Poet used in it's most typical understanding as an artist/performer of some sort who is tortured by their own fears, heartbreaks, demons etc.

Tortured Poet as a tongue in cheek description of someone who views themselves as an Artist in the vein of category 1, and as a result is dramatic and somewhat pretentious

Tortured Poet as a criticism. A variation on 2, but instead of just poking fun at that attitude it looks at the harm it causes.

Tortured Poets taken to mean an artist who is being tortured, not by their own demons as the phrase typically means, but actively by someone else (the public, the Industry, the nature of fame itself).

Category 2 is best seen in "The Tortured Poets Department" the song. There we have the contrast of self-image and reality which is called out in the chorus, but in a affectionate, sort of tender way. The speaker and the subject are both included in this ironic self-description.

Category 1 is essentially the baseline for the album. By naming the album after track 2 there is an acknowledgement of sorts that perhaps the whole thing leans a bit into the melodramatic, but naming the album with just a bit of irony allows most of the tracks to completely commit to just being earnest, unselfconscious, full-throated expressions of whatever emotions they're trying to convey. "The Black Dog," "loml," "So Long, London," "I Hate it Here," "The Prophecy," and "The Albatross" all demonstrate this approach pretty clearly.

Category 3 takes the song's subject and says essentially, "you see yourself as a tortured poet, and here's how that broke us." "The Tortured Poets Department" has elements of this with lines like "But you're in self-sabotage mode/ Throwing spikes down on the road" and "But you awaken with dread/Pounding nails in your head"-- though it ultimately comes to a less critical conclusion because the speaker is willing to embrace that because she sees herself in the same way: "Everyone we know understands why it's meant to be/ 'Cause we're crazy." However, songs like "My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys" "I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can)" and especially "The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived" exist more fully in that critical mode.

Category 4 is summed up by what Taylor said about "Who's Afraid of Little Old Me?" in her Apple Music commentary: "I felt bitter about just all the things we do to our artists as a society and as a culture. There’s a lot about this particular concept on 'The Tortured Poets Department'". The poets are being tortured, but this time it's not by themselves, or even by their fellow tortured poets (as in the Category 3 songs) and other people in their personal lives; this time it's right up on stage and in public. "Who's Afraid of Little Old Me?" "I Can Do it With a Broken Heart" "Cassandra" and "Clara Bow" are most strongly about this, but it's also present to varying extents in "But Daddy I Love Him," "The Albatross," "I Hate it Here," "How Did It End," and "thanK you aIMee."

And then there's the secret fifth category. Category 5 is for the non tortured-poets. "Robin" is about protecting a child from that side of the world. The speaker in this song is still a tortured poet, but she's viewing the subject (Robin) who may or may not be a poet, but certainly is not tortured, and the speaker is reflecting on that innocence. "The Alchemy" also retains a Tortured Poet presence-- the verses present the speaker in that way-- but the love interest has no such characterization. Instead, he's the opposite. He's not a poet, so he gets sports imagery, and he's not tortured, so he's joking and celebrating, and his arrival brings this sudden sense of lightness and triumph into the album with him. This is taken even further with "So High School" which has no trace of any tortured poets anywhere (with "I know Aristotle" we might get a glimpse of poet, but at this point she's not tortured). The whole song is the antithesis of the idea of the Tortured Poets Department. And following all the turmoil that the speaker has experienced in the rest of the album both by being a tortured poet and by dating them, this song comes as a much-needed release. It's ease and relaxation and a sort of joyful simplicity in stark contrast to "cyclone" of the Tortured Poets Department.

[goldenavenger02]

“The Tortured Poet's Department: I know it's not out yet, but based on the vibes, the few lyrics we've seen, the fact that it's probably going to be in the vein of folklore and evermore and the whole message of the album (finally being free after years and years trapped and unhappy), I really think it's going to fit Misako. POSSIBLY Garmadon, but that's my prediction and I'm fully prepared to eat my words.”

Now that the album came out, would you change what you said? I think but daddy I love him or maybe fresh of of the slammer kinda fits idk ttpd isn’t my fav

Okay, now that I've had a week to digest and process the album (no, I still don't know the lyrics and as much as I love Taylor, I will never be staying up till 2 a.m for her music, or anyone's music, ever again. I stopped processing lyrics during But Daddy I Love Him lol) I still somewhat stand by my perdiction.

Fortnight, My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys, So Long, London, But Daddy I Love Him, Fresh Out The Slammer, I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can), The Black Dog and imgonnagetyouback feel very Garmadon/Misako to me

The Tortured Poets Department, Guilty as Sin? and How Did It End? feel very Wu/Misako to me.

And Flordia!!!, The Albatross, I Hate It Here, I Look In People's Windows, The Prophecy, Cassandra, The Bolter & The Manuscript feel very Misako to me.

But what I wasn't expecting was songs that didn't feel like her or either of her canon relationships.

Like loml, The Alchemy and So High School that feel like Jaya. I Can Do It With A Broken Heart that feels like Jay season 4. Who's Afraid Of Little Old Me which is so Lloyd Oni Trilogy (but also Harumi). Clara Bow which feels like The Lucky One and Nothing New AKA Wu passing down the "master" mantel to Lloyd. Peter which has some Kailor paralells.

And the songs I haven't assigned yet (Down Bad, The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived, Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus, thanK you aIMee & Robin) are just floating around in endless space until my brain goes "wait a minute!"

So yes, I think my prediction was somewhat correct but I am totally open to other opinions because the album has only been out for a week and I made my original list after Midnights had been out for about a year and a half.

[livvyofthelake]

now that we’ve been sitting on it for four months i need to rank the tortured poets department for real… it means nothing to rank an album two days after it comes out like that’s pointless fr let’s take this seriously

guilty as sin. this is an insane song. unfortunately i read a book the week this album came out and this song is permanently attached to that book in a small part but as we all know i did my absolute best to remain chill neutral and only weird about tsc at the time of this album drop so it all balanced out in the end and none of the songs are particularly associated with anything cringe. except two. but not this one i only brought up the book because it’s a little bit associated. you understand. the song is a slay of epic proportions on its own of course. i’ve mentally made this one about so many fictional guys it’s crazy… we have fun huh

my boy only breaks his favorite toys. this one was my instant favorite she’s not going anywhereeeee

but daddy i love him. some people don’t understand it but i do… i love her…

the alchemy. honestly? who are we to fight the alchemy…. literally!!!!

the albatross. sort of like who’s afraid of little old me if it was a song i liked more!

so high school. what more is there to say than truth dare spin bottles you know how to ball i know aristotle brand new full throttle touch me while your bros play grand theft auto it’s true swear scouts honor you knew what you wanted and boy you got her brand new full throttle you already know babe…

florida. cunty! florence + the machine!

the black dog. aforementioned two songs. well we knew this would be one. like we knew that the whole time. what could i possibly have done to save this one… genuinely what could i possibly have done. we saved the album in time i know but i mean. we all knew this track was a goner. nothing to be done. it’s a great song though like genuinely let’s be honest… one out of 31 is a great ratio. april 18th me was expecting a much worse percentage tbh

down bad. i just like it :)

who’s afraid of little old me. mildly over saturated. but kinda deserved the hype she slays

fresh out the slammer. one of aforementioned two songs that kinda got ruined. this song is about cbs drama fire country forever there’s nothing to be done. it’s not a huge loss this song is a little mid if i’m being honest. i think it’s too short i don’t fuck with it heavily

fortnight. my husband is cheating!! i wanna kill him!!!!

the prophecy. song that makes you cry…

the smallest man who ever lived. crazy ass bridge. rest of the song. well.

i can fix him (no really i can). i like that this song title is formatted like a fanfiction title that’s a lyric to a taylor swift song…

imgonnagetyouback. like. cute fun song sure yes. cannot get it out of my head that me personally if i had asked for writing credits from olivia rodrigo on a song that sounded nothing like my song, i personally would not have released this. me personally…

how did it end. crazy song that makes you go damn her life suckssss for real… yikes!

i can do it with a broken heart. not even a bad song it’s just the popular one with swifties and i hear it all the time without my consent.

the tortured poets department. can i be honest. sometimes taylor swift writes songs that would be awesome if not for one utterly batshit ridiculous lyric that embarrasses me so bad i can’t even fuck with the song. this has happened many times she’s an embarrassing celebrity to like everyone knows this. it’s not even the “you smoked then ate seven bars of chocolate we declared charlie puth should be a bigger artist” that’s actually fine. it’s what comes directly after that. “i scratch your head you fall asleep like a tattooed golden retriever” taylor. 😐 i can’t. i can’t even talk about this actually. also i can’t stand the lucy dacus and jack antonoff name drop lyrics at all like taylor please stop embarrassing me….

i do not actively listen to any of the other ones anymore so i just didn’t include them because why would i rank songs i don’t even listen to let’s take this seriously… they’re fine. the only one i might describe as a song i actively dislike is chloe or sam or sophia or marcus. like i do not care for that one at all