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yanderenightmare · 4 years ago

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Oh master, plez, DRAGON WARRIOR BAKUGO, my lord! I was thinking, if you please, a darling who is like clairvoyant, and that's why King bakugo needs her??? can you make it dark ;3 like like like whatever means necessary dark, like like like ill murder anyone who gets in my way, also also also it being really grotesque, I want merciless bakugo, BUT also kinda sweet when it comes to darling?? I don't know what exactly I want, but I know whatever you write I'll prob enjoy, Master Nightmare :3

DRAGON ! WARRIOR ! KING BAKUGO KATSUKI x FEM ! READER

goodiebag WARNINGS: abuse, violence, genocide, kidnapping, abduction, death, blood, murder, ableism, classism, anxiety, arson, narcissistic personality disorder, slavery, trauma, war

so, a little foreword, the darling in this story has a quirk (ik, I’m breaking my beliefs thinking Bakugo should have a quirkless reader! The insanity!) but it’s because in this au not it’s quite special to have a quirk. Quirks are achieved and not given so to say. So Katsuki has earned his quirk and reader has earned her quirk, and so has everyone else who has a quirk. Also the song is called “If I Had a Heart” by Fever Ray, it’s the theme song to vikings ironically haha.

PART TWO

MUTE AND NUDE

The King was in her village.

Word from the south spread quickly, like any wildfire would, especially when riding the wings of a dragon. The Kingdom’s seer was dead, and the almighty bruise-knuckled King required a new one. They called it misfortune, but give a child a toy, and the toy is destined to break. Some might say that that’s what they’re made for. The old toy had apparently done something so distasteful that it cost her own tongue. Unfortunately, or perhaps ironically the only thing she was useful for: on her knees, mouth open, worshipping her king.

She counted the smoke rising to the sky near the horizon. Hers would be the thirteenth village they came to, lest their quest was done. She thought she might have seen him in the cloud-coverage. Eerie shadows resembling what bats she found in the caves, but the sun was bright and could easily be mistaken for him, or the other way around, as she’s heard his coat is golden.

She heard the rumbling tumbling of hooves and paws and claws riding up the mountain-side. They were coming.

Their houses were made of rock, sturdy as they should be when placed on a mountain-top with constant winds howling at them, and handled the fire well. But people aren’t made of stone. The smell of burning flesh is awful, and though she had nothing to puke, she barfed nonetheless. People were screaming and she probably would have too if she could, she was most certainly crying and bleeding and heaving for breath like those unlucky others that were still left alive.

High mountains are a bleak habitat for animal life, partially why they lived up there: to be spared of being hunted, to escape fangs and claws. And now: people running for their lives, the aching in her ankles, a body not built for running, and a mind not used to being hunted. Yet, it was strange but, it wasn’t really foreign at all.

She’d been dreaming of things lately, and as death as well as dust and ash and blood settled and seeped into the mud around her, she couldn’t help but feel as though she’d seen it all before. In fact, there came a point in the middle of the fray she was certain she was dreaming as she stopped to eye the great golden mass in front of her. Scales sharp and silvery like mica on the mountainside, ruby-red eyes as though soaked with blood. Teeth long and sturdy like the jagged rocks of the tunnels, dripping not with water as they did in the caves but with blood and guts and torn clothes. And the talons, curved and shiny, black as night, digging into the gravel by his feet, treating the soil as though it were as thin as the air. But the wings… the wings are what had her falling to her knees, skin bitten by gravel. Greater then roofs, sweeping the sky as though he could pluck each and every star from the welkin, stud himself with them if he so wanted to, or swallow them if only to breath the light onto earth. He could shred trees with those wings, he could slice oceans apart, he could probably part the mountain, head in the heavens and roots with hell, the bridge that had stood for thousands of years, singlehandedly torn open by that great monster conquering both sky and earth as though they gave him life.

Her arm was bleeding. It had dentures, no… puncture wounds it seemed the more she looked. A pretty crescent moon of red marking deep into the soft tissue of her meager muscles, dripping onto the dirt, creating streaks in the mud caking her bare feet. She looked up to see a wolf turn into a man, a large man with spikes for hair, red but not the same red she’d seen earlier in those eyes, red like poppies far away from the red flowing in her veins, from what was leaking out of her arm.

She looked forward and saw bodies… no, not bodies… mangled mockeries of the human form strewn about her as though they were trampled wildflowers on a field. She looked to her side and saw her reflection in the faces of those she’d grown up with but never truly knew. She looked behind her, not spotting what abomination of life she’d seen earlier, the one painting the sky, the one eclipsing the sun.

Every young, pretty thing was lined up on a row that stretched about ten meters long as they weren’t that many in her village, and she was surprised to be one of them. The auditions began in the early left side of the fray, boys and girl shaking on unsteady knees, holding onto broken arms and gushing wounds. Her bitemark was begging for a fist around it too, but she had not the focus to indulge the wish as her eyes caught sight of a blot of gold contrasting the otherwise grey figures, it being clear who he was despite having altered form. Although not the tallest in stature, one could see it as clear as day, he towered over the rest of the flock.

The tones ripped from their throats were scratchy, untuned; garbage. It would seem none of the kids in the village were gifted, but if the Gods were of mercy they would grant them the vocal cords to survive the night. She couldn’t blame them for allowing their fear to taint their song. Seeing how the drapes in which the hooded figures dressed were soaked in blood from past failures. Knowing well how their weapons would breach flesh and bone were they not of any use to them.

If she had a voice she would use it for speaking and not for singing. This would probably be her last night.

They rushed through the girls and boys rather quickly. Swiftly; as if they had done it countless times before, as if they could decide by the first utterance of their very first tone, that they were a disappointment, that they were as good as dead.

Caught in the middle of the small gathering; her turn came along. The man, standing in front, had purple hair and a nasty scar on his face, adorned with bladed eyes like a cat. Another blade, a steel blade, was held at her throat. Unnecessary, as the brutal scarring of his arms was intimidating enough for her to understand she could survive nothing compared to what he had already lived through. “Sing.” He commanded abruptly, an atmosphere of force settled on the word, as though compelling her, quite like how the wind shakes the trees in command to dance for them.

She did her hand gestures as smooth as she could under the pressure, lips remaining closed.

He threw his eyebrows up, scar shifting in its place like a serpent, the message had clearly gotten across. A condescending smile, a most sinister snicker and an unfortunate scoff was all the sympathy he allowed her. “No voice?” It wasn’t a question. “What a meaningless life.” He stated in a mutter, before moving onto the next girl.

The golden figure, who had followed discreetly, didn’t continue on with the scarred boy, he instead planted his clawedfeet in front of the girl, threatening to crush her barefooted toes, sinking into the red clay of the town square. “Sing.” His voice was fuller, and because of it she didn’t dare look up.

The scarred boy came to a halt, looking back to watch the girl repeat the hand gestures once again, she thinking that maybe the scarred boy had blocked the view the first time.

“No excuses.” His foot shifted in the mud, talons somehow growing longer as they impaled the ground, indicated he leant in closer. “Sing.” He said again, the sharpness of the demand sending a shiver to travel down her spine as it was accompanied with a growl too much like the sound of thunder to be called human. The girl furrowed her brows and looked up, her bottom lip visible quaking. Yet, what looked at her was no dragon, no… it was a man, a boy. And his skin was not golden like the rarity found in the mountain halls, but tan like sand, and his hair was only a shade lighter, nothing alike the mane of the sun. But those eyes had her quaking, those sharp slitted eyes that seemed to hold her soul in a chokehold, full of cultivated knowledge, merciless, red like wine, red like blood, red like hell. What’s a fate worse than death? She wondered and swallowed at the thought, her breathing picking up its pace. “Sing!” Spit flew to her face like venom with the roar, the tone reverberating through the ground, shaking in her knees.

She felt the itch in her throat, and she would be lying if she said she hadn’t been feeling it more and more lately, the feeling of dead born words somehow washing away. Her whimpers, absent of anything except for breathiness before, now carrying a somewhat lilt of tone. She stared a little deeper into those blood-soaked orbs of the man that looked like the onset of death before her.

“If I had heart.”

The wind roared as if it were as surprised as she was, or perhaps it rejoiced, or perhaps it mourned.

She was silent, the wind crashing and flailing, whipping the rags of her dress, letting the ripped fabric lick her dirty and bruised legs, pulling the disheveled locks of hair out from her face. Eyes; terror-wide, looking into a pair of sharp ones, who seemed to be looking beyond her disheveled state, into something far more divine than she had ever seen, ever known. “Continue.” The red-eyed boy commanded firmly, a detectable form of lust in his voice.

Startled, feeling the gravel dig into her soles. “I would love you... if I had a voice, I would sing.” The people on either side of her looked to be even more distressed now, crying and screaming, looking like wraiths in those charcoaled rags they wore, hands covering their ears as though to protect themselves, terrified as they looked to the sky expecting it to come falling down upon them.

However, their insolence and disrespect wasn’t what angered him, he could allow them that much before he took their lives. But the conflict found in her voice, that’s what truly boiled beneath his skin. He reached out his hand, quick like a viper, the pressure in his fingertips simmering on her skin, sizzling with heat, only for him to dig his fingernails into her throat as well. “Forget everything you know, except for that your life is in the palm of my hand.” He said, securing her gaze, lifting her up to her tippy-toes, though still nowhere near leveling his height.

Awakened by his words and frightened to her bones by the searing look of his eyes, she did as she was told and forgot who she was, forgot what she was and gave into simply doing exactly what needed to be done to keep her alive, to keep what beast in front of her subdued, or perhaps also to satiate what fire seemed to have burst to life inside of her, screaming to be heard. “After the night, when I wake up, I’ll see what tomorrow brings.” Eyes glazed over by some infernal light. She roared, a howl of some sorts, and the trees seemed to shiver and shake in the outmost reverence. “More, give me more, give me more.”

Somehow the leaves stopped rustling at the sound of her abrupt finish. Overwhelmed; all she could do was breath, all she could to was quake, the wind making the tears ever present on her face, the blood of her arm drying and awakened again as new blood came gushing out of her wounds.

The swirling dramatics in his eyes died down into a calm yet eerie content look. “Found you.” He stated, taking his time for the awakening to soak in, bask in the glorious feeling of triumph, before breaking focus from her. He let out a long, satisfied sigh. “Burn the village.” The statement left her blood turning cold. “There’s nothing left for us here. Dispose of the disappointments.” He was quick with his words as though they had been said many times before, and the actions performed by the ones in grey were just as swift, just as merciless. Humans turning into monsters murdering humans.

“No!” She wasn’t aware the voice belonged to her, so many years gone by without being able to voice anything; an opinion; nothing more than a foreigner, let alone an objection.

The people beside her dropped to the floor like rag dolls nonetheless, her voice just as insignificant as if she was still voiceless, drowning in their own bloodied throats. Her throat didn’t match theirs, but had strong, calloused fingers wrapped around it instead, coated with blood, the stench of it becoming so familiar yet far from friendly.

“Forget them, they don’t matter.” His voice still sheer, despite the screams around them both, overwhelming in fact. She felt her mind slip away from her then, as though her sentience was squeezed out from her by the deadlock fist wrapped around her neck, a conquering drowsiness following, seeping into her like the crawling of darkness when the sun settles on the horizon, her vision blurring everything except for those red, red eyes, who; from this point until her death, would never leave her.

PART TWO

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mellowyandere · 4 years ago

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SCP Academia Eraserhead Part 2

Reader: F

Characters: Aizawa Shouta (main); Kurogiri

Summary: After struggling to find his way out with Dr. L/N, Eraserhead is offered some help. (This turned into a lot more exposition than expected. Part 3 will get steamy though I promise! I’m just a hoe for setting the stage.)

Length: 1442 words

Warning: Yandere-themes.

He had been running for a while now. Hallways and corridors bleeding into one another in a way that turned his head upside down. He hadn’t had to open any doors so far, and a strange absence of security set off little alarms in the back of his head.

Left…no right? He snarled in frustration. Curse this stupid foundation. He knew it wasn’t going to be easy but this was simply ridiculous. He peered down at your unconscious form, nestled protectively against his chest in a layer of his tendrils. So small and weak... he had to keep pushing forwards.

He had been forced to kill a couple of SCP’s along the way, not all being as sentient and rational as himself. Their desire to kill you forfeiting their rights to life.

Shit. Another dead end.

Something cleared their throat behind him, causing him to spin on his heel. His tendrils flared out ready to cut down whatever it was. To his surprise there stood what appeared to be a man made of mist, wearing human clothing. His sharp attire strongly contrasted his own, which consisted of an orange jumpsuit, the top half having been torn to shreds when he unleashed his tendrils, and a pair of standard issued boots.

“Move out the way. Don’t make me hurt you.” He didn’t have time for this, who knew when security would appear to regain control of the breach.

The mist man raised his hands to show his non-hostility. “You look a bit lost… would you like some help leaving this place?”

Eraserhead narrowed his eyes in suspicion. “Why would you help me?”

“Don’t you find it odd..” Ah great this might take a minute. If he wasn’t blocking off the hallway Eraserhead would have left by now, but the man in front of him didn’t look like someone he could simply side step.

“Beings such as ourselves don’t belong here. By all means humans are nothing more than fodder in comparison. And yet they contain us? They’re witty creatures with dangerous minds, it’s what gotten them this far. But so are we. This containment breach was no accident, I’m sure you’ve already noticed almost every enclosure open, save for the truly unhinged ones. And a complete lack of guards to corral you back to your prison. No, there are higher powers at play. But now isn’t the time to delve into that, so I’ll ask again… would you like some help leaving this place?”

The mist man finished his little speech and opened his arms, inviting Eraserhead forward.

“What’s the catch?” Eraserhead knew better. Nothing in this world was done from the kindness of one’s heart. Well, except for you. You were the only real kindness he had ever known.

The mist man chuckled. “I see you are a man of caution. Yes this exchange is not for free. We’ll be keeping tabs on you. Your intelligence and abilities make you a very strong creature indeed. One day we’ll need you to help free our kind from the shackles of humanity.”

Lowering his arms the man took on a more sinister aura. “Let it be known though, I don’t need your consent to teleport you. I’d choose my offer. After all that human in your arms looks so frail, she might not make it out here alive if you keep at it.”

Shit. This bastard wasn’t leaving him with much choice.. should he fight his way out? He wasn’t exactly sure what his opponents abilities were besides teleportation. Even if he erased them, can you punch a man made of mist? His clothes clung to him, but who knew his real body composition.

No. This man was too dangerous, and his threat towards your well-being still hung heavily in the air. “Alright. Deal.”

The mist mans nodded with a hum, satisfied with his answer. “Start with continent, State or province, then major nearby city. Small nearby towns if applicable.”

Eraserhead listed off what was asked of him. His goal was to bring you to his old self-isolation home. He used to live amongst humans with little to no problems. His larger than normal stature at 6’10” raised a few eyebrows but nothing too serious. He kept the dark markings along his torso covered, and a scarf helped to hide his deathly white complexion. As for the eyes, he always wore sunglasses.

His issue had arisen with the month of his “birth”. For as long as he could remember, during the month humans called November, he went absolutely feral. Losing all control over his himself he’d slaughter anything that crossed his path. He’d make sure to isolate before November came along, and for the most part it worked. He had lived many centuries alongside humans with only the occasional slip up.

Five years ago he slipped up. And the SCP foundation had been all over him ever since.

“I can’t get you to any of the nearby towns, but I can get you to the city,” the mist man stated. “Step forward, I’ll take you there now.”

With that the man began to spread out the mist that defined his body, pooling out until he filled the entirety of the corridor. Eraserhead stepped forward into the blackish purple abyss, his vision going dark. Squinting he tried to peer through the pitch black that surrounded him, until finally he could see again. Stars lit up the night sky above him, and the sound of cars echoed down far below. Stepping onto concrete he moved out of the portal. This creature had quite a powerful ability.

“What you do from here is up to you. We’ll give you some time to adjust and then we’ll contact you. Do not think that you can hide from us.” With that the mist vanished and Eraserhead was left alone atop a tall building with you in his arms.

It would be about a half a day of running to get you home from here. Meaning it would be wise to stock up on supplies now. That way he wouldn’t have any reason to leave you alone for the next week or two as you adjusted to your new home. The tall creature checked you over, making sure you wouldn’t wake up anytime soon before leaving you on the rooftop. It wasn’t an ideal situation, but he’d move fast.

Jumping from building to building he made quick work of locating and snagging some clothes from a local donation box in order to change out of the tattered orange jumpsuit. One extra-large black long sleeve shirt and accompanying extra-large pair of blacks pants. Grabbing a few bags that had also been inside, he headed for the nearest chain supermarket. He’d stock up on essentials like food and nest making materials, as well as daintier things that you might like such as feminine soaps and fluffy stuffed animals.

Due to the limitations in his interactions with you he didn’t really know what you’d want, but he had the rest of your time together to learn.

He was going to prove to you that he was the best mate you could ever dream of having. No one else would ever be good enough for you. And no one else would ever be good enough for him with you now in his life. He had never encountered a human like you before, and he’d be damned if anyone ever dared try to take you away or hurt you.

Making quick work of the supermarket he dashed out as the alarms rang. It hardly mattered though, he wouldn’t be coming back to this city. He had enough money stashed away that he’d be able to buy what he needed from small towns as to not draw attention to himself. Despite what the mist man had said about a new world order, he didn’t want to chance the foundation getting back on its feet and finding him.

Quickly climbing the building he left you on he was relieved to see your small form still sound asleep on the cold concrete. He wrapped his tendrils around his new stash of goods and scooped you up in his arms yet again, taking a moment to nuzzle his face into the crook of your neck and deeply inhaling your scent.

Even if he had to give up part of his freedom to get here, holding you in his arms had all been worth it. Now all he had to do was get you home, and then he’d make sure to repay every gesture of kindness you had ever shown him tenfold. His precious cute little human.

#yandere aizawa #aizawa x reader #aizawa shouta x reader #yandere shouta aizawa #aizawa x you #bnha aizawa #SCP Academia

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forsakenoathkeeper · 4 years ago

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I Am Alive (chapter 5/?)

Deviant!Connor[RK800] x (fem!)Reader Rated M(18+) for canon-typical violence and gore, medical procedures, and graphic sexual content

Synopsis: You were a mechanical engineer, now a nurse for androids, who moved back to Detroit after the revolution to offer aid. After reconciling with an old friend, you became rather acquainted with his android partner.

Please support me on AO3 & thanks for reading ♥

Connor wasn't oblivious to what he was doing.

'Rogue' was one word that came to mind; but, that was a bit extreme all things considered. He wasn't acting against the police and he didn't intend to commit any crimes, especially heinous ones.

He was hunting the android alone, without clearance, without jurisdiction.

-not like this was the first time.

He had intel that the human detectives didn't have. A good lot of them didn't respect him, some more obvious than others, and often disregarded his input on things. Of course, they were never hesitant to let him take the lead when dealing with dangerous individuals or gunfire.

Most of the time, it didn’t bother him.

Fowler saw him as a competent detective and needed the manpower, now more than ever. Hank trusted him with his life and stood up for him. That was all the recognition that Connor needed.

Having to work alone wasn’t all that terrible. He was faster, stronger, more capable of discretion... usually. He didn't have to worry about putting someone in danger or being slowed down. It also meant that he could-

-bend the rules in ways that only androids were capable of.

The other detectives were hung up on the possibility that Evelin Wheeler was murdered by someone she had crossed in her days as a lawyer. Connor had found seven cases that ended with death threats. Three of those cases, the plaintiffs or victims, were still alive and living in or near Detroit.

While other detectives were investigating those potential leads, Connor took to the streets to see if he could locate Robert. Maybe it was his programming talking; but, Connor was suspicious of the android.

Clouds were heavy and dark in the sky, the smell of approaching rain thick in the air. Connor was waiting outside of Haven in a nearby alleyway, perched up against a crate where he could duck back into hiding or lean out and see into the street.

He was standing near an abandoned warehouse that seemed to have suffered structural damage at one point, rubble having collapsed into the plot nearby. The towering structure was an eyesore and provided good cover for the detective. It was also across the street from Haven.

Connor fumbled with his coat pocket, fishing out a coin. He rolled it between his fingers as he waited.

You had been texting him, a very welcomed distraction from the monotony. Though, if Connor was being honest, waiting never bothered him. He couldn’t quite tell if it was because his android, a part of his programming, or just the way he was.

"u know u dont have to" was your latest message, popping up in the top right corner of his HUD. You had trouble getting your car started this morning and had taken a taxi to work. When Connor found out, he asked if he could give you a ride home.

"If I'm being honest, it is not just for your sake. I want to see you" he texted back.

It had been a little over week since he last saw you. Work had been hectic for you both, between countless damaged androids and Connor knee deep in multiple cases, one in particular that was rubbing him the wrong way. Even if he only got to sit in a car with you for thirty minutes, that would be good enough.

"i miss u too" your reply came in. Connor smiled at that and briefly pondered how to reply.

When people were 'an item', what did they do? Attending a restaurant together seemed to be the most common answer that came up in his searches; however, considering Connor did not require sustenance, and lacked the components to dispose of them, he couldn't eat.

Surprisingly, ‘drinking’ came up a lot, too. There was no way he was taking you to a sleazy bar. There were always clubs. Did you like that sort of thing? He didn’t want to make assumptions about your lifestyle. There was the added concern that Connor didn’t know if he could dance. He had never tried it before.

'Walks in the park' also came up in his searches; while Connor was not easily perturbed by the weather, you likely would find it far too cold outside. The local movie theatres were closed down temporarily due to the uprising, leaving that option out, as well.

He could invite you over to his apartment; but, what if you took that as an unwanted suggestion? He missed you in that manner, maybe more than he cared to admit; but, he didn't want to give the impression that it was all he cared about.

Connor's LED was blaring yellow as he internally argued with himself. He aggressively shifted his coin from one hand to the other and flung it high into the air with a flick of his thumb.

Humans did this - 'heads or tails' - so he tried it.

When it fell back down, he snatched it from the air, opened his palm and glanced down. The coin had landed on tails. Connor glared at the harmless nickel disk for not giving him the results he wanted.

Okay. Maybe he was thinking too hard.

-maybe he just needed to go for it.

"I want to treat you to something. If you would like that?" Connor messaged you.

Likely caught up in something, you didn’t reply immediately. So, Connor began rotating his coin again, rolling it between his fingers, flicking it back and forth between his palms. He had no idea where this quirk came from: if it was programmed into him or some bizarre string of code that manifested itself. He could do it without much processing power, making it rather relaxing.

"if you wanna? u dont have to do anything like that" your message popped up on his HUD some time later.

"Is it weird that I want to?" Connor messaged you back.

"not at all" you replied. He read it in your soft voice and found himself feeling bashful. He felt weird, like he wanted to do things for you - unnecessary things that you were perfectly capable of doing yourself.

"theres a park i loved as a kid. we can go when it warms up?" you offered.

"I would like that" Connor replied.

A thought came to him, something that he chided himself for: he had hoped for something he could do for you, now, not later.

But, then-

"until then i like ur apartment" immediately came in afterward.

Connor gawked at the message like an idiot for a moment or two before he snapped out of it. Maybe you had read his mind... somehow.

He had no need for a TV because he could get all the news on the interface in his processing unit. He didn't have a need for many dishes for obvious reasons and only bothered to keep the fridge plugged in in case Hank brought something over. His apartment was severely under furnished by human standards.

Suddenly, he wanted to change that.

"You are welcome anytime" he replied. "I'll make sure its warmer this time"

Your reply came fairly quickly; but, Connor didn't see it.

Movement caught his eye.

An android was approaching Haven, not that that was anything new. However, he dressed in a dirty hoodie and torn up pants, ankle-high work boots matching what Connor had seen in Evelin Wheeler's home, the correct height and stature for the model type seen in Louis’ memories.

Connor slid the coin back into his coat pocket and focused his optical sensors on the android. He couldn't get a good enough look from this angle to see into the propped up hood.

The detective waited outside while the other android crossed the threshold into Haven.

Markus wanted to do things the right way. Connor respected that.

It meant that he would inform Robert the police were looking for him and try to encourage him to speak with them. If he was innocent, that meant he had nothing to hide. But Connor knew that Robert would likely attempt to flee, even if he was innocent.

The android was inside the building for eleven minutes and some odd seconds before he stormed out the front and trotted down the street. Connor didn't waste any time taking up pursuit. The android had some haste to his steps, but wasn't running. Still, Connor knew he would lose him if he dawdled for a second.

Rain began to fall, beginning in gentle sprinkles that coated the concrete and asphalt in faint specs. Connor could feel the rain like gentle taps against his outer skin. It was useful: the noise made it harder to properly hear the sounds of their footsteps. That potentially risked the chance that Connor would lose Robert; but, it also meant he was less likely to be detected.

He needed an empty, quiet place where he could interrogate him. But, Connor also was well aware of the fact that he didn't have backup. If the android proved to be more dangerous than he anticipated, he would be alone and at great risk.

-again, this was nothing new.

Connor recognized the route Robert was taking. He was heading for the industrial district's harbor.

It wasn't abandoned. Factory work had resumed, albeit with struggles considering the android workforce had been lost. However, people were trying to return to normal life. They needed to; and so, the ports reopened and shipments starting to flow again.

The detective continued to stalk behind the android for miles, paying no mind to the fact that he was steadily growing farther and farther away from where he had parked his car, nor the fact that he was getting soaked by the rain.

When they arrived at the harbor, Robert took a path through a rundown building that was likely once a communication hub for a business that went under decades ago. It was longer than a direct route, but provided cover, less any of the human workers at the nearby plants spotted him.

In following, Connor realized that abandoned shipping containers were piled up outside. The rust and erosion patterns suggested they had been here a long time.

At the end of the row of containers, another building, a steel hub right at the edge of the water. Normally, these were open, designed to be for receiving and sending shipments, unloading. However, someone had taken the time to board it up.

Robert entered through a hastily cut out hole acting as a doorway.

Connor knew this was the end of the line. He was going to have to face Robert here.

He took one, careful step past the threshold, and realized there was an echo. That alone made it near impossible to continue sneakily. When Connor stepped forward, he felt something scan him. It was harmless, a perimeter censor: the kind of motion detector that could pick up android's serial numbers with a quick scan, and send alerts to the programmed android. It was, essentially, an intruder alert.

The detective turned his head to the adjacent wall. Sure enough, there it was, the size of a quarter, at head level, eyeing him.

He was intrigued that Robert had taken the time to setup defenses here. It wasn't particularly deterring, just a simple alarm that would prevent him from being snuck up on. Connor could hear Robert's shoes loudly squeak on the floor. He was pacing, probably deciding his next move.

Connor continued, turning down the hall and stepping into the main hull.

When Robert spotted him, he took a few steps back, maintaining distance between them. Connor took up a firm stance, feet shoulder length apart, arms crossed in front of him, hands cupped, like a soldier might stand.

"Why are you following me?" Robert called out, sounding more annoyed than anything else. The echo in the room was loud, creating an obnoxious tremor around them.

"I wanted to talk to you - ask you a few things," Connor replied calmly.

Robert was silent for a moment, eyeing Connor suspiciously. "You're the detective android," he said lowly. "I heard stories...” Robert looked him up and down. “You're not as intimidating as I expected."

If that was intended to insult Connor, all it managed to do was make him curious. What kind of images had Robert conjured in his mind of the android detective?

"Why haven't you removed your indicator?" Robert asked in a manner that was almost taunting. "You think we're equal to humans, don't you? Why wear something that sets us apart?"

"It doesn't matter to me if people know I am an android," Connor answered, maintaining his passive tone. It wasn't entirely the truth. Sometimes, he wanted people to know he was an android. He was once frightened by the idea of deviancy; now, it felt like a badge of honor. Maybe, he was prideful: he was the first detective android to join the force, and the last and only of his model.

"You work for the humans - against us," Robert accused. “What makes you think you have any right to stand with us?”

"I don't work against androids. I work against murderers," Connor proclaimed. He could see panic flash behind Robert's eyes. But, the android was quick to compose himself. "-human or android," Connor added on.

Robert opened his mouth; but, Connor, growing tired of this pointless banter, decided to be direct.

"I'm here because I believe you killed Evelin Wheeler."

"Who?" Robert asked, his head tilting to the side. From his lack of concern, Connor couldn't quite identify if he was being sincere, or just didn't care.

"An elderly woman who was being cared for by an android," Connor elaborated robotically.

Robert shrugged. "What makes you think I did that?"

"I saw you harassing the android living with her," Connor answered, tone lowering.

Robert settled a firm glare on Connor. "Harassing? I wanted to help him be free."

Connor kept his stoic expression, eyes unyielding of his emotions, LED strong blue. "I'm glad you remember them," he replied lowly.

The detective could see some stress rise in Robert. He wasn't frightened by Connor. He was growing steadily more and more angered by him.

"Then, surely you-"

"He was delusional," Robert interrupted sharply, clearly insulted. "Called her 'family'. I had to help him. He was being controlled by that human. I set him free."

"He was free,” Connor corrected him. “You hate humans. That's what it is. It has nothing to do with justice.” He maintained his persona: a cold, calculating detective.

The other android didn't seem to like that word. "You still elevate them above us, you hypocrite!" Robert snarled. "Don't talk to me about justice."

"Human or android, you killed an innocent woman in cold blood," the detective said lowly, letting his stare darken slightly.

"Where's your proof?" Robert challenged.

"Your shoes match the impressions at the crime scene," Connor stated bluntly. "You also were seen harassing the family-" Robert twitched at the word. "-a week before the murder. That's enough circumstantial evidence to obtain a warrant for your memories for that night."

"Where's your w-warrant, huh?" Robert challenged, his voice faltering slightly. "Why am I not under arrest, yet? You have nothing!" Robert shouted, his voice echoing around the chamber.

Connor narrowed his eyes slightly. "742-11-904, you are under arrest for trespassing on private property-"

Robert suddenly shifted and charged at Connor. Being a unit designed for industry work, he was bigger than Connor, bulkier with a wider frame and greater weight capacity; but, Connor was agile, flexible, and designed for combat. He avoided his assault with ease, but wasn't able to counter. His back hit the wall and Robert continued down the hallway past him.

Connor took up pursuit, finding that Robert took a different path out. He chased him into the harbor, out in the open, where security lights shined down on them. Workers from a nearby plant were perched on a balcony on the second floor. Connor could hear their surprised murmurs, "what the hell - you see that shit?"

Chain link covered the edge of the dock to act as a barrier to prevent falls. Connor contemplated pulling his gun on Robert; however, trespassing wasn't an offense worthy of firing, and he had yet to obtain the warrant he needed for the murder case. Pulling his gun would have been a one-way ticket to suspension, or likely worse.

Robert wasn't made for this. Connor was going to catch up to him. The android likely knew this. He had to take a path that Connor wouldn’t follow. He climbed the chain link, reaching the top before Connor got to him, and dived over the edge, straight into the harbor. The splash was drowned out by the rain tapping on the metal roofs nearby.

Connor looked over the edge to where the dark waters lapped at the concrete platform. Naturally, he couldn’t see anything through the murky water. He sighed, placing one hand on the chain link to lean against it.

"Well, so much for that," he groaned to himself.

It was unlikely that Robert could stay submerged for long, even less likely that he would surface here. He wasn’t going to return to this hiding place, nor Haven. Connor would have to find him through other means.

The rain started to pick up, sprinkling morphing to heavy droplets. Connor's eyes adjusted to lighting, or lack of, naturally. He was too focused on finding Robert that he failed to realize the sun had set. The time was normally hidden on his HUD as it was intrusive, distracting. He didn't need sleep. He didn't need rest. He could theoretically go days without a break.

When he brought the time temporarily back into view briefly, he realized it was 7:17. Your shift ended at 7 tonight, and he had promised he would be there.

"Shit!" he cursed out loud, swiveling away from the fence.

As he trotted away, shoes making wet sopping noises on the concrete, Connor started a message, "I'm sorry. I'm going to be a little late".

Before he sent it, he realized that he had missed your previous message.

"hold u to eet" you had replied. It was in response to his promise that the apartment would be warmer next time. But, it also struck him as a painful reminder that you had placed trust in his ability to get you home safely, and in a timely manner.

The rain continued to pick up until it was pouring down, like tiny rocks pummeling his body. It didn't hurt, but it was exhausting. He had fucked up, twice. He failed to capture Robert and now he was delaying you.

Instead of sending that message, he decided to call.

It rang once, then twice-

"Oh - shit - are you here already?" you blurted into the phone as soon as you answered.

"N-no, I-" he stammered. "I'm going to be late. I'm sorry."

"Actually - that's fine. I got so caught up in this thirium shipment, I didn't realize what time it was," you explained, sounding out of breath. "I was afraid I was keeping you."

"I wouldn't have minded waiting," Connor replied, feeling some relief at your words.

"No - don't say that," you scolded gently. "Don't take bullshit from anyone, Connor."

"Ugh-" he stammered. Did he take bullshit from people? Maybe he did and he just didn't care most of the time. Was waiting for you bullshit, anyway? He didn’t need to sleep, afterall.

"Working late, too, huh?" you breathed into the phone.

"Field work," Connor replied lowly.

You chuckled into the phone. "You know I can take a taxi if you're-"

"No, I-" he interrupted sharply. "I want to see you. Please."

"Connor," you breathed into the phone.

His phone wasn't a handheld device. It was an interface build into his processor. He could hear you directly in his head. Even through the slight distortion created by radio signals, the sound of your voice still managed to do something to him. Maybe he underestimated how badly he missed you.

In the background, Connor could hear one of your coworkers, "ooooo - who's Connor?" teasing at you in a purposely obnoxious voice.

You laughed quietly. "My boyfriend," you answered.

My boyfriend-

For some reason, something as mundane as you telling people that, made him really happy.

There was some shuffling noises, likely you moving around and trying to balance something in one hand and your phone in the other.

"Is he cute?" a different voice asked this time.

Connor was prepared to eavesdrop on this conversation in full; but, after some loud shuffling, you came back, speaking into the phone properly. "I'm gonna let you go, now - get this finished up - oh shit it's raining - let me know when you're in the parking lot?"

"Understood," he replied automatically, a habit. Plus, if he was being honest, he was disappointed.

"-and don't stress about it, Connor-" you added on hastily.

Fuck that-

-as soon as you hung up, Connor was running to his parked car.

#connor x reader #deviant connor #deviant connor x reader #dbh fanfic #rk800 x reader #rk800 smut #connor smut

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just-dreaming-marvel · 4 years ago

Text

Love Is Not Forced ~ 19

MASTERLIST

< previous chapter

Word Count: 1,800ish

Summary: Y/N and Steven spend an afternoon together.

Notes: I’m feeling a little nice today.... so here’s this chapter, one day early. (Plus it’s kinda been a hard day. And seeing people enjoy my series makes me happy.)

Making conversation during dinner was hard for both Steven and Y/N, but they pushed through it. Y/N just continually moved her feet back and forth in the sand when it was becoming hard for her to be there. She wanted to grabbed the small necklace around her neck and fiddle with it nervously. But she knew that if T’Challa had figured out who the gift was from, Steven would too.

Once dinner was over, Steven and Y/N quietly walked back to her room. She wasn’t ready to leave the beach yet, but she knew it would be there when she woke up.

“Thank you for introducing me to the beach,” Y/N said upon arriving to her door. “It was truly as beautiful as you said.”

“I’m really glad you enjoyed it.”

“I can’t wait to see it tomorrow.”

“About tomorrow, I was wondering, have you ever been on a boat?”

“A boat? I can’t say I have.”

“Would you care to join me for lunch on my boat?”

“Um… yeah. That would be nice.”

“Okay then. I guess I’ll see you then,” Steven shifted around awkwardly. He wanted to grabbed her hand and place a kiss on it, or even place a kiss on her cheek. But he didn’t want to over step.

Y/N stepped back, allowing her back to hit against the door. “Goodnight, Your Majesty.”

“Goodnight, Your Highness.”

When Y/N woke up in the morning, she instantly thought about the night before. And how it actually wasn’t all that terrible to spend time with the King, especially when he’s watching his tongue. Y/N took her time getting up and ready that morning. She had breakfast brought to her while she wrote toe her family and Loki. She wrote to all of them about how much she had fallen in love with the sea already. To Loki, Y/N specifically wrote that, when they run away, she wishes that they stay by the sea.

Lunch time rolled around and Lord Samuel Wilson was sent to bring Y/N to where the ship was docked. They chatted as they headed to the dock. Sam telling stories about the King that made Y/N laugh. King Steven’s so big in stature and strong in leadership, that it came as a surprise to Y/N to hear that he actually is a giant push over. Mostly when it comes to those closest to him. When it comes to matters of the kingdom though, King Steven would do whatever’s best for Brooklyn.

“That’s not a boat,” Y/N exclaimed, when the dock came into view. “That’s a ship!”

Sam chuckled. “I guess that His Majesty didn’t want to brag.”

Y/N noticed that Steven seemed to be nervously waiting at the bottom of the ramp. “I thought you said you were taking me out on your boat?” Y/N teased as she and Sam walked up to the King.

If it weren’t for the beard, Y/N was pretty sure she would have seen a blush rise on his cheeks. “Oh, yeah… I didn’t want to—“

“It’s completely fine, Your Majesty. Your ship is quite beautiful. Shall we get going?”

“Yes. Thank you Sam for bringing her here.”

“The pleasure was all mine,” Sam responded, winking at the Princess.

“Thank you for the company,” Y/N smiled at Sam as she slipped her arm through the King’s.

She missed the look of surprise that overtook his face as she did so. But Sam didn’t, he simply gave his King an encouraging smile and walked off. The King guided the Princess up the ramp and onto the ship. Neither of them made a move to remove their arms from each other’s as the King let Y/N lead him around the ship as she explored. The crew quickly got the ship onto open water. The Princess ran over to the side as the ship picked up speed.

“What are those?” She asked, pointing to some grey animals that seemed to be swimming with the ship.

Steven peered his head over the edge as well. “Those are dolphins,” he responded. “They enjoy swimming against the ship. Sometimes, we just stop out in the middle and watch them jump.”

“They jump?” Y/N looked excitedly at the King.

“Yes.” He nodded. “Actually, if we move to stand in the bow, we might be able to see a few of them jump.”

“Can we?”

“Of course.”

The Princess took the King’s arm, before he could even offer it again, and the two hurried to the bow. Steven allowed her to stand in the very front, while he stood behind her. Y/N placed her hands on the edge as she leaned forward to see the dolphins.

“Woah,” she exclaimed as she wobbled haphazardly.

Steve quickly placed his hands on Y/N’s hips. She gasped and tensed a bit at the unexpected touch. It was weird. A buzz shot up her, she couldn’t even describe it.

“I’ve got you,” he said softly.

Y/N glanced back, and up, to look at Steven. He was looking down at her kindly. It was weird. But a good weird. She took notice of his eyes, for what seemed to be the first time. Steven’s eyes were blue, like Loki’s but at the same time not. She looked at them a little longer, unable to tell if she was falling in love with them or drowning in them.

“Thank you,” she whispered.

“Anytime.” He gave her a small smile. His eyes suddenly looked past her. “Look, Y/N.” He pointed over the bow, still holding onto one of her hips firmly. “There they are.”

Y/N followed the King’s hand to see two dolphins jumping just in front of the ship. A grin grew across her face as she watched the dolphins jump in and out of the water. Steven watched Y/N instead of the dolphins. It made him so happy that the Princess seemed so happy. The two lost track of time as they stood there and watched as more dolphins joined. Before the two royals knew it, the ship had turned around and docked.

“It’s already time to go in?” Y/N asked, sadness lacing her tone. She turned around, facing Steven, suddenly realizing how close the two fo them were.

“It is,” Steve said, looking at her in a way Y/N had never seen someone look at her. “I’m sorry that we didn’t stop for lunch.”

“That’s fine. I had a nice time.”

“I’m glad.”

“I hope that you had a nice time as well, Your Majesty.”

“I did.” The two got lost in each other’s eyes, slowly moving closer to each other. “I am sorry about lunch though. I owe you one.”

“I’ll definitely be holding you to it.”

“Wouldn’t expect anything less.”

Steven’s lips quickly captured Y/N’s. His hands, that were still near her hips, pulled her closer as her hands moved to hold onto the back of his neck. His beard was scratchy, but nothing that bothered her too much. As they kissed, she began comparing Loki’s kisses with Steven’s. Loki’s were full of passion and a little forceful, where Steven’s seemed to be soft and full of care. It was nice. As she got lost in the moment, the necklace moved against her skin, reminding her of where her heart lied. Suddenly, Y/N placed her hands on his chest and pushed him away.

“I’m sorry,” she panted. “I… I had a good afternoon. But I’m tired and I should go.” She hurried passed Steven.

“Y/N, wait!” He called, following after her. “I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable.”

“You didn’t. I’m just tired. I’m going to turn in for the night.” Y/N continued towards the castle as Steven continued to follow, not far behind.

“At least let me get you some food. You can’t skip two meals.”

“I’m not hungry.”

“Y/N,” he reached to grab her arm, “I didn’t mean to—“

She pulled her arm away harshly when Steven’s fingers brushed against it. “Don’t touch me.”

They both stopped and faced each other. Steven felt as if the whole sea was between them, even though he could just reach out and touch her. He watched as Y/N’s eyes became watery. Guilt began to consume him. He shouldn’t have kissed her. It was too much, too soon.

“I’ll have dinner sent to your room,” Steven said softly. “If that’s what you want.”

“Thank you, Your Majesty. I’ll see you in the morning.”

The King stood on the beach, watching the Princess hurry into the castle. He had messed up once again, with no clue how to fix it this time.

“Your Highness,” Wanda called, wheeling a cart in. “Dinner’s here.”

“Thank you, Wanda,” Y/N said. “Can you just push it around the bed?”

“Of course.”

It was hard for Y/N to hold the tears in until she reached her room, but she did it. She cried as Wanda, without questioning, helped her get ready for the night. The Princess was so confused. She loved Loki, she knew that much. But then why did she enjoy the King’s kiss? And why could she feel feelings begin to form for him?

Wanda left quickly after pushing the cart to the Princess. Y/N ate in silence, trying to comb through the avalanche of thoughts in her mind. As she was just about finished, she noticed a note hiding beneath one of the plates. Carefully, she picked it up and opened.

My Dearest, Y/N,

I am sorry if my actions earlier upset you somehow. I never wish to upset you, yet it seems that is all I’m good at.

I had a wonderful time this afternoon. Watching you, watching the dolphins brought me happiness. I only ever wish to bring you the happiness I witnessed today.

I would not blame you if you never forgive me. I keep messing up when it comes to you. But, I do hope that you will continue to give me a chance to show you that I really do wish to get to know you and bring you happiness.

Tomorrow morning, I am to visit one of the villages. It would be my honor if you would accompany me. You do not have to, if you do not want to. My carriage and I will be leaving at nine. I do hope you join me.

Forever Apologetic and Your Servant,

Steven

As Y/N finished reading the note, her heart became increasingly more torn. It wanted Loki, but it also started to want Steven. For herself and her kingdom. And she had no idea what she was going to do.

next chapter >

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#steve rogers x reader #loki x reader #t'challa imagine #thor x reader #tony stark x daughter!reader #the avengers x reader #avengers x reader #marvel imagine #steve rogers imagine #loki imagine #thor imagine #avengers imagine #king!Steve Rogers x reader #marvel royalty au #marvel medieval au #marvel au #marvel fanfiction #avengers fanfiction

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floorbe · 4 years ago

Text

Kiyotaka Ishimaru x Reader “Dance With Me”

Warning(s): angst, hurt/comfort, fluff, cheesy. very, very cheesy

Summary: You comfort Taka after someone insults him at prom... and also end up accidentally confessing to him. Cool!

Pairing(s): romantic Kiyotaka x reader, implied Mondo x Chihiro

A/N: reader is gender neutral! this is... kinda very self indulgent so bear with me if its ooc lol... I just could not stop thinking abt hnnngh taka kisse at prom... also happy bday to Taka I love u

Fandom: Danganronpa, Non-despair AU

Word count: 2,663

You flop into your seat at your prom table with a heavy sigh. The flashing lights disrupting the otherwise dark room around you make you close your eyes for just a moment to reinvigorate yourself. You came to prom with your friends Mondo, Chihiro, and Taka. Only with them. Unfortunately, no one had asked you to the dance. Not that you didn’t want to go with your friends, but it would’ve been nice to have a date... (...Okay, that’s a bit of a lie, because you only wanted to be asked by one specific person. One specific person with one specific pair of stunning red eyes. Anyone else you would’ve politely rejected. But still!)

Taking a sip of your water, your eyes wander back to the dance floor that you’d just left in favor of taking a break. You easily find your friends, Mondo with his large stature and inky black suit stood out quite well, and while his hair isn’t in its usual pompadour tonight (he’d pulled it back into a ponytail, claiming the sweat from dancing would make his hair droop, and that’s not tough looking) he’s still easy to pick out from the crowd. Matching him is Chihiro, though much smaller, wearing a similarly dark green suit. In stark contrast dancing next to the two, however, is Taka, wearing his usual knee high boots, however this time coupled with a pure white suit.

You laugh quietly at the sight of the three dancing awkwardly together. Despite the awkwardness, you have to hand it to Mondo and Taka. For how stiff their dance moves are there certainly is passion behind them, and it’s only proven when Taka almost elbows someone behind him in the face from how viciously he swings his arm. You let your eyes stay on Taka for much longer than necessary, smiling to yourself as it seems like he challenges Mondo to a dance off.

You rarely ever get to see Taka let go of his usually strict behavior, and while he still has kept order in the dance for people who were breaking rules, you could tell he was still loosening up and actually having fun. Your smile easily breaks into a grin as you watch him attempt to do the robot, and you’re only vaguely aware of how fast and loud your heart seems to beat while looking at him, hastily blaming it on the intense dancing you’d just done.

That’s easily proven as a lie, however, when your heart jumps as Taka suddenly locks eyes with you, smiling widely and waving. You intake sharply and wave back, ignoring the obvious fluttering in your heart and the sudden shakiness in your hand. Taka turns back to his dance competition, but it seems Mondo is more interested in sending you a smug grin, making you stick out your tongue at him. He laughs, and you swear you can hear it over the booming music.

You continue to sip your drink as a few more song pass, occasionally grabbing a cookie from your plate to nibble on as you enjoy the eager atmosphere. As the current upbeat song comes to end, you feel a nervousness climb into your throat as the next song is revealed to be a slow dance. While you weren’t expecting anyone to ask you, you still couldn’t help how awkward you felt watching all of the couples dance when you didn’t have anyone... though the few people trickling back to their tables alone did give you comfort.

You instinctively find your friends again, wondering if they’ll be heading back to join you until the next upbeat song. You’re surprised to find Mondo awkwardly offering his hand to Chihiro for a dance, and you can’t help the grin that spreads across your face as they relax into a close embrace to sway along to the song. This time it’s you that gives Mondo the smug grin, and he just scowls at you before he jerks his head towards Taka, wiggling his eyebrows. You scrunch up your nose, shaking your head as he rolls his eyes and focuses back on Chihiro, who’s giggling at the exchange.

You unwillingly find Taka’s figure in the crowd, curiosity overtaking the fear of seeing him dancing with someone else. He isn’t, surprisingly, but it does seem like he’s talking to someone... who then turns away from him as he looks away, seemingly embarrassed. Did he just get rejected for a dance...? You can’t help the agitation that sparks in you at the thought of someone rejecting him. Even if you were slightly jealous at the thought of someone else dancing with him, he doesn’t deserve to be rejected. You watch as he takes a deep breath and turns to someone else near him who’s standing alone.

“Excuse me,” you’re torn from your focus on Taka by a new voice. You turn to them curiously, cocking your head as you recall it’s someone you’ve almost never seen before. Maybe in one of your classes? “Do you want to dance with me?” he smiles kindly, and you almost take up his offer with a smile before your eyes catch Taka walking quickly out of the room, wiping his eyes with his sleeve.

You squint in confusion, trying to find the person he was just talking to, only to find them laughing with someone else, sparing glances at where Taka was leaving. “I’m sorry,” you turn back to him, “I have to go check on my friend.” His eyes flick to where you were looking at Taka and he nods understandingly, backing away with a kind wave.

You quickly make your way out of the dance room, searching for Taka’s familiar figure. You catch a glimpse of him retreating into a more secluded hallway and immediately go after him, worry gnawing at your gut.

You hear him before you see him, quiet sniffles and muffled sobs into his hands as he presses his forehead against the wall. You softly call out his name, making him jump in surprise and jerk his head to you. He quickly turns away again, almost hiding himself away from you as he curls in on himself more.

“Hey,” you make your way over to him, placing a hand on his back to rub it soothingly, “Hey, Taka, what’s wrong?” You slide your hand from his back to his shoulder, gently nudging at it to make him turn to face you. He lets you turn him, still choking back sobs as his watery eyes meet yours. “Oh,” you murmur, tugging him into a hug, “Come here, it’s okay.”

Any resolve he had to pull himself together for you crumbles as he nearly collapses into your arms, sobbing heavily into your shoulder. You wrap your arms around him as he clings to you, clutching the fabric of your outfit as he pulls himself as close to you as possible. His shoulders shake as he buries his face further into you, gasping in between sobs. You hold him tightly, murmuring “it’s okay”s’ and “I’m here”s’ whenever his sobs seem to get especially intense.

His sobs slowly start to ease up, turning into quiet hiccups as he calms down. You continue to silently soothe him as his once violently shaking form settles into mere trembling against you. You don’t let go of him, you don’t even loosen you grip as he stops sobbing, and he doesn’t dare pull away from you. You both stay in the comforting embrace as he shakily finds the composure to explain.

“I-I...” he trails off, swallowing back more tears as he hiccups once more, “I asked someone to d-dance with m-me- but th-they-...” He cuts off, gripping you tighter as he tries to collect himself to finish the sentence. “Th-they said that everyone w-would stare, and that d-dancing with m-me would just b-be an embarrassment,” his voice breaks mid sentence, and you can feel his chest heave as he struggles to choke back more sobs.

Anger sparks deep within you. An embarrassment? Taka is the sweetest person you know, how could they even dare say that to him? Swallowing thickly, you take a deep breath. Now’s not the time to blow up at them, not with Taka so broken in your arms.

“Taka,” you start softly, “They don’t know what they’re talking about. Dancing with you wouldn’t be an embarrassment. You’re one of the sweetest people I know, anyone would be lucky to dance with you.”

“I-it’s alright, Y/N, you don’t have to-”

“No, I mean it. You’re one of the most amazing people I know, Kiyotaka,” you state firmly, and you can feel his hold on you tighten ever so slightly, “You’re- you’re so passionate and kind and caring- everything you do you put your full heart into it, y’know? And I-I just-” You cut off as Taka pulls away to look at you, fumbling over your words as you see the look of tearful wonder on his face at your passionate words.

Swallowing thickly, you’re suddenly aware of just how close you two are (and how his arms are still wrapped around you and vice versa... when did it get so hot in this hallway?), stuttering as you watch his deep red eyes flick between yours.

“I-I- sorry, I’m a little tongue tied,” you try to play off your flustered state, averting your gaze. “I-I’m not used to... I’m a little embarrassed,” you realize your mistake as soon as it leaves your mouth, and you snap your eyes back to his to see them fill with tears again.

He starts to unwind his arms from around you, uttering a quiet, “Oh, I-I’m sorry...”

You’re quick to tug him back to into your arms, frantically trying to explain, “No, no, Taka, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like- like that, I-” You take a deep breath to collect yourself as he tensely rests his chin on your shoulder, arms only loosely wrapped around you from when he tried to pull away. “I-I guess flustered would be a better word?”

“...Flustered?” he asks quietly, and you can imagine the way he’s furrowing his eyebrows.

“Yes,” you agree quickly, not thinking as you try to correct yourself, “Li-like- embarrassed is more shameful, but flustered in this situation implies more romantic... tones...” you trail off, heart jumping in fear as you realize what you’d just confessed. You feel him stiffen as he processes what you said, and when he pulls away you’re nervously avoiding his gaze.

“Wh-... do- r-romantic?” he sputters, and if you weren’t looking at the floor you’d see his face flushing intensely, “Do... do you really feel that way?”

“U-uh,” you unclasp your arms from around him, instead fiddling with your hands, “W-well, uh... Y-yes?” He’s silent for a few moments, and your face feels like it’s on fire. You really had to confess to him, didn’t you? You try to swallow the newfound lump in your throat, “U-um, I’m sorry, we can just pretend I didn’t-”

“No!” his voice is louder than either of you expected, making you both jump. “S-sorry, I didn’t mean to be so loud... I-I just... I feel the same,” he admits shyly.

“Really?” you ask, bashfully looking back at him. He nods stiffly, a small smile spreading across his face.

He seems to finally realize how he’s still holding you, for his face gets redder as he lets you go, “Sorry, I didn’t realize-”

You wrap your arms around his neck, drawing him in yet again for another hug, “No, no, it’s fine.” You sigh contently as he shakily returns the hug, taking a moment before speaking again with a grin, “Do you want to dance with me?”

He pulls away to look at you, unsure, “...Even if people stare?”

“Let them,” you say immediately, “I’ll let everyone stare if it means I get to dance with you.” You hear him intake sharply and you laugh quietly, “S-sorry, was that too cheesy?”

He shakes his head, smiling widely “...No, not at all.”

“Good,” you murmur, though neither of you make any signs of moving. You’re once again reminded of how close you two are when his nose just barely brushes against yours. You almost instinctively tilt your head as his eyes begin to droop shut. You feel his breath fan across your lips as you almost close the distance, eyes finally closing as you feel his lips just barely ghost against your own. Your lips tingle with anticipation, and you’re about to finally close the gap when-

“Yo, you two back h-?” Jerking your heads away from each other, your’s and Taka’s heads snap to find Mondo at the end of the hallway, looking thoroughly surprised. “Oh, shit, sorry,” he grins teasingly, “Nice, bro!”

“B-bro!” Taka shouts, embarrassed. You groan, covering your face with your hands as you try futilely to hide yourself in Taka’s chest. You smile from beneath your hands as he tugs you closer to himself.

“Sorry, bro, I’ll leave you two be,” Mondo laughs, “Chihiro and I will be at our table.” You hear his laughter fade quickly, likely rushing to find Chihiro and spread the news.

Leaving your hands to rest on his shoulders, you raise your head to look at Taka again, only to find him already looking at you. He tenses slightly as you catch him, stuttering awkwardly, “W-we should get back to bro and Chihiro.”

“Y-yeah,” you nod, but you stop him from moving away when he tries, earning a noise of confusion from him, furrowing his eyebrows at you. “But first-” you lean closer to him again, sliding one of your hands up to cup his face as his eyes widen. “Maybe we should...?” you give him time to pull away as you lightly brush your lips against his, looking at him curiously as he leans in just a fraction closer, only to halt.

"I-I’ve never- um...”

“That’s okay,” you murmur, smiling reassuringly. You slowly press your lips against his, pulling away slightly as he tenses. His eyes almost squeeze shut as he shakily connects your lips again, gradually melting into you as you stroke his cheek with your thumb soothingly. You take it slow, gently moving in sync with him as he lets himself sink into the kiss, bringing up a hand to gently cup your cheek.

When you separate you hear him sigh shakily, pressing a soft kiss to your cheek as if thanking you. You smile adoringly at him, unravelling yourself from him to guide him back into the dance room, fingers laced as you come back just as another slow song begins. You easily lead him onto the dance floor, squeezing his hand reassuringly as he nervously looks at the people around you two.

You bring him close to you, whispering to ignore everyone else and focus on you, to which he smiles and breathes out a thank you as you begin to sway with him. You can see tears shimmering in his eyes as he dances with you, smile growing wider as you grin at him. It’s awkward, with you two stumbling over the other’s feet, or accidentally bumping heads as you lean too close, but it’s endearing, because it’s Taka.

And you’re sure he feels the same, for whenever you two stumble or trip, he always ends up laughing with you at the easy mistake, even despite the blush on his cheeks.

Even when the music changes to a more upbeat song, and when Mondo and Chihiro join you and you all end up forming a strange dance square around each other, his eyes still are mostly on you, and yours on him. Chihiro and Mondo seem to occasionally exchange knowing looks at this, and Mondo even claps Taka on the shoulder, much to his embarrassment.

But as your eyes glide over all three of them to land on Taka awkwardly attempting to do the sprinkler, you decide you wouldn’t have it any other way.

#kiyotaka ishimaru x reader #danganronpa x reader #danganronpa imagines #danganronpa scenarios #kiyotaka ishimaru #danganronpa #thh

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sammy-gvf · 4 years ago

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We get along (for the most part)

chapter 3

warnings : just some cursing

plot: the local rebel badass girl and lee bodecker have had some run ins, lets see how it goes, shall we?

Previous chapters will be linked, one is pinned on my profile

Climbing my way up the steep and creaky stairs of the chapel, I look up and start to see the sunlight leak through the glass stained windows, taking it step by step and looking at my feet as I walk.

I’m taking my time walking up the stairs though, I really am not in a rush to get back to the hot box of a room they call the chapel. Stopping, I look outside to see Lee standing next to his cruiser. I find myself staring for a moment, I can't put a finger on why I’m in such a trance.

Lee is standing there drinking his coffee out of a plain white plastic cup, I watch as he lifts it up and brings it to his pink lips. His jawline is flexing every time he brings the cup up to take a sip, I can't help but stare. He suddenly turns over to his left and spits out tobacco, his eyes travel up the dirt to the window I’m absentmindedly staring at him through.

“Fuck” I whisper to myself as I duck down below the window. “ I hope he didn't see me” I think to myself. I wait a minute to pop back up and then I suddenly hear footsteps coming from behind me. I look behind me and it's just Mrs. Bodecker, I softly smile and walk up the stairs alongside Ruth in silence. Entering the Chapel, the hot air instantly slaps me in the face and I instantly break into a sweat.

As I slide back down next to my parents, I look back at the space that Lee was sitting in. His wife looks around to see where Lee could have possibly gone off to, so I decide to get up quietly and sit next to Ruth. People stare as I quietly get up out of my seat in the pew and walk over to sit in the empty spot that Lee occupied before he went outside for some unknown time. Ruth smiles and scoots over a bit to let me sit. For the remainder of the church service, Ruth and I just exchanged quiet smiles and enjoyed each other's company.

Standing up and saying a quiet “goodbye”, I step out of the pew and turn towards the door to find a rather pissed off looking Lee Bodecker waiting for me.

I slowly walk past Lee with utter precaution, I’m terrified he will touch me again the way he did not even 3 hours ago.

Now that he has done what he has to me, I feel rather intimidated by him. I won't lose my attitude, not one bit but I'm a little scared of the physical power he could have over me.

I book it over to my fathers car, it looks like I’m the first one out of church. Sighing and my head hanging low, I turn around to sit in the bed of my fathers truck when I bump into something. I look up and find that it isn't something but someone.

Lee Bodecker towers over my tiny stature, as I’m only 5 foot 3.

“You looked quite in a rush to leave the chapel, huh?” he says as he leans up against the side of my fathers truck.

“Lee, I really don't want to talk to you.” I say as I start to turn away from him, I only got a few steps in before he grabbed my arm.

“When your sheriff is talking to you, you answer.” He says with authority, turning me around to look him directly in the eyes

quickly escaping his grip, I back away from him

“ Do you really think I'm going to respect you after what you just did?Also, dont fucking touch me again. Who do you think you are?” I spit at him as he just stands there with his hands on his hips and a smirk on his face. “Go to hell, Lee.” I turn away and start to walk towards the church again to meet up with my family, but he stops me by trailing behind and taking the space in front of me as his.

He spits out the toothpick he had in his mouth and replaces it with a mint. Completely unable to move, he hovers over my ear and whispers “Darlin, you ain't seen nothin yet.” and he starts to stride away from me.

I instantly get goosebumps and the hair stands up on my arm.

Not knowing what to say until he is at least 6 feet away from me, I blurt out

“By the way, met your wife. She's too good for you.” I say as I pop a cigarette in my mouth, I light the cigarette and take a few steps backward, distancing myself from him. Promptly as if complete rage took over, he starts to speed walk towards me and I just stand there watching with a smile on knowing that we won't be alone any longer.

A group of people walk out of the church,chatting and laughing; including Lee's wife, Ruth. Standing on the porch of the church, I see her wave towards Lee and I, only I wave back. I take the last puff of my cigarette and put it out under the sole of my shoe. I cock my head to the side and give him a little “bye, bye” smile and a little wave

Lee gives me a “I’ll get you” look as he slowly turns away to walk towards his wife.

“ Lee! Honey, where were you the last 30 minutes of church?”

My eyes follow him as he walks up to his wife, he puts his arm around her waist and guides her down to his car. As she gets herself into the car, he turns around and gives me a stern look before he steps in. I can't help but chuckle out loud as he tries to look intimidating.

My brother and parents walk up to the car to get in and I see Lees police cruiser slowly drive past my family and I. Looking past the cruiser, I hop in the car and we start to drive away from the chapel.

About 10 minutes later, we arrive home and I hop out of the car to head to my room. I immediately flop onto my bed and groan. I have so much work to sort out and do, college has had me absolutely exhausted.

I go to Knockemstiff Community College, as a business major. I usually prefer to do work at the library or the diner, I just can't concentrate at home. My father is always ramblin on about somethin, he’s a retired coal miner. Always goin on about the news or some drama floatin around town. Thinking about how my father will most likely try to talk about something stupid with me, I decide to grab my things and head over to the library. My friends know i'm usually there around 1 or 2 oclock on Sundays so they usually meet me there.

============================================================

The town of Knockemstiff is not large by any capacity whatsoever, so anyone you see walkin around town, you most likely know.

Looking out my car window, I watch as people walk to the same place I see them go every single sunday. Some goin to the pharmacy, the butchers, the small grocery store we have here, it's all a repetitive process.

Pulling up to the library, I grab my stuff out of the passenger seat and head inside to find my friend waiting patiently at the table we usually sit at.

Knockemstiff has its quirks and this fine ol library is one of them. The gray building sticks out among the rest of them in this lil town. Stepping in, it never ceases to amaze me, the architecture of this library is nothing compared to the town hall. The high rise ceilings make the room look massive and the oak bookshelves give the room a type of glow. I always have enjoyed scanning the many rows and sections, getting lost without a worry in the world.

“Mags! Oh, girl have I got gossip for you!” She says to me and frantically waves me down to come sit with her.

Lilly-Ann Brighter has been my very best friend since high school, we did everything together and we still do. Her parents were not too fond of me, bein the rebellious kid in school didn't give me the best reputation with her parents but they got to know me better and now consider me one of their own. It's been a long journey trying to get Mr. and Mrs. Brighter to trust me with their careful daughter.

I sit down hurriedly and wait for her to tell me, I haven't seen her in 2 weeks so I'm curious as to what she has to tell me about. I get out my books and paper, set them up and wait for her to blurt out what she has to say, she's always been one to tell me all the gossip.

“ You will not guess who moved in nextdoor to me!” She says whispering to me over the table, we may be in a library but nothing will stop her from talking as loud as possible.

“Who? Was it that boy you said you met in your classes?” I say as I open my textbook to the tiny tab sticking out of the top of it, the pages are torn from previous owners and many years of use. I had bought this from the school store, it was rented previously. I grab the cup of coffee that Lilly had brought for me.

“ The Sheriff and his wife moved in yesterday.” Lilly says

Immediately, the hot coffee I was drinking went down the wrong tube, choked a little bit and then started coughing, Lilly gave me a worried look as I slowly got up from the table to walk to the bathroom, just so I wasn't interrupting the other people in the library with my coughing fit.

Arriving to the bathroom, I instantly let out the suppressed cough i was holding in, letting all the liquid that got stuck in my throat come out. Practically hacking up a lung for 5 minutes, I go over to the sink and splash some water on my face and take a drink from the faucet. Looking up at the mirror, you notice bruises slowly starting to form on your chin, Lilly is for sure going to ask questions.

“ Why the fuck are things happening to me like this” I say outloud to myself.

I give my face one last look and I head back out to the main library to study with Lilly.

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finally chapter 3 is out!

dont forget to like/reblog and leave some opinions !

tags- @youcancallmeishita , @raisinbransam , @hillest , @please-buckme ,

@buckysdolls , @nerdy-depressed , @ladyfallonavenger , @do-not-pray-for-me , @not-another-fangirl

#lee bodecker #sheriff lee bodecker #tdatt fanfiction #tdatt #sebastian stan #seb stan #ongoing fic

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izzyphantomgamer · 4 years ago

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It will never be the same again [Kuroo x Reader x Kenma]

"Hey, who would you choose as a boyfriend?"

[L/N] [F/N] slammed a book on her desk. It was a normal afternoon at school, lunch hours were underway but instead of lunch, the student sat alone by her desk, near the window, a heavy thought in mind. Her classmate and only female best friend was talking to her at the school library, despite her heavy insistence on reviewing for their next text. She was busy writing in her notebook, but her friend had other intentions. She had a playful smile placed on her face as she stared at the person in front of her, immersed in her own world of study.

"You never had a boyfriend, right?" She started out casually and without looking up from her book, [L/N] replied with a nonchalant answer "No and never was interested." Her friend let out an unamused sound to let out her displeasure about her response before she smiled again and engage her deeper in the conversation.

"You've been friends with Kuroo senpai and Kozume san ever since you were really small, right?" And to her question, she let out a small hum in confirmation. "I'm surprised you still haven't gone out with either of them." She pressed and much to her amusement, she saw her classmate came to a halt but never raising her eyes to meet hers. "What do you mean?" She inquired but she knew well what she implied "Kuroo senpai is cool, tall and smart, volleyball captain of the team as well! Kozume san is quiet but looks so adorable and shy most of the time that you just want to eat him up, his volleyball techniques are also amazing!" She giggled quietly due to her own thoughts.

[L/N] was listening intently to her words, several people pointed out the fact but she always ignored them. Kuroo and Kozume were her childhood friends and ruining the said friendship was out of question but her friend, who wore a knowing smile only continued. She leaned in close and asked "They're both boyfriend material. You, Ms. [L/N], are a beautiful woman and intelligent at that. Many boys came to you to confess their undying love but you shot them all down. What if Kuroo senpai and Kozume san like you as well?" The girl in question felt her whole body tense up.

She was frustrated that people always brought up the conversation, was it not possible to just be friends? She always thought about it, but she only sighed to the people who always put their relationship under a malicious eye.

"Hey, who would you choose as a boyfriend?" She asked and [L/N] had had it. She stood up, picked her things and exited the library, all in a hurry. As she left the library, she felt particularly warm in her cheeks. She had a strong grip on the strap of her bag, making her way to her classroom where she would be alone.

Or so she thought.

"[F/N]."

The sudden voice made her jump from her seat. She was quick to stare at the source of an all too familiar face. A tall boy with black and messy hair, half-lidded hazel colored eyes, leaning on the door frame of their classroom.

"K-Kuroo!" She exclaimed as she stood up from her seat, harsh enough to almost knock her chair on the floor. She felt her whole body tense once more and she also felt her face burning, she could only hope that her heart would not explode out of her chest.

The boy raised an eyebrow and observe her strange behavior. He noted how she was trembling a little, how flushed her cheeks were. He entered the classroom and began to take a few steps to her direction. He came close to her face to take a better look at her. Is she sick? He began to wonder. She could only stare at Kuroo, she felt too nervous to even move and she hated it. She never felt uncomfortable with him before so why now? He began to become too close for comfort. She saw how he continued to lean in and braced herself for whatever was to come. She felt pressure on her forehead. She dared to open her eyes and, despite her hazy gaze, she saw how Kuroo leaned his own forehead to hers, his eyes closed and she noted how his hands were inside his pockets. She was, obviously, smaller than the captain but never did it occurred to her just how much taller her childhood friend was compared to her small stature and it made her feel like her legs were about to give up on her if he stayed any longer than he should.

"[F/N], your body temperature is really high. You should…" Words from his mouth began to disappear when he noticed that the girl in front was ignoring him. "Hey, [F/N] are you listening to me?" Rhetorical question, he gave her an annoyed look for not hearing him out but he noticed how she continued to avert her eyes from his gaze. Kuroo was about to speak up once more when [L/N] parted her lips to utter out words. "K-Kuroo… You idiot…" she muttered softly and she refused to meet his gaze, her cheeks very bright red.

He felt the world stop. He stared at her with wide eyes, incredulous. Her eyes were watery, her lips trembling and a little parted, she was blushing so much. The room fell silent, all he could hear was the acceleration of his heartbeat. Before he knew it, [L/N] dashed out of the classroom and Kuroo was left behind. He tried to call her name but he found it hard to even utter a word. He continued to face the direction she fled away from.

He lifted his hand and covered his mouth, it was his turn to blush. He felt his eyes being torn away from the door, to focus instead on the floor of the classroom. How on earth did he find himself in such a situation?

"What the heck was that about?" He asked himself.

[L/N] felt exhausted. She ran away, she ran away from Kuroo. She felt like an idiot as she sat in the empty art room. There was still a lot of time before their break ended, it was safe to stay inside she thought.

"[L/N]?"

She felt her heart almost leap out of her chest in surprise. She never noticed another presence across the room. She could recognize the quiet voice anywhere. Golden orbs stared at her, his posture unsteady as always.

"Kozume? What are you doing here?" She asked and she stood up from her seat to move right next to the quiet setter. Kenma shifted a small bit to give the girl a little more place to sit, he never liked other people in his personal space but she was an exception. "Lev wanted to practice during lunch break, but even though I told him I had no intentions he wanted to drag me to the gym so I ran away from him." His soft voice loud enough to be heard by her, his attention on his phone, another game perhaps.

[L/N] only chuckled at the story, it was a normal occurrence but she never thought she would find him hiding inside a classroom. She began to watch him interact with his phone, it was fun to watch him play his video games without any care in the world.

After a few minutes had gone by, Kenma locked his phone and earned a curious brow from the girl next to her. "Kozume, is there…" she was cut in the middle of her sentence when she felt a weight on her shoulder. Kenma closed his eyes and continued to lean his head on her shoulder, he sighed "How many times do I have to tell you to call me Kenma?" The [h/c] stiffen, it happened more than necessary that her friend scolded her for not listening to his request.

"Kenma." she tested unconsciously and to her surprise, it felt so natural how his name came out of her lips. In a second, he lifted his head off of her and turned to face his childhood friend. This time, he leaned over his arms which were folded over his bent knees. She saw him smile at her in the barely lit room. "Not too hard, right?"

Again.

She felt herself blush, Kenma barely smiled and he never did it on his own accord but here he was. A gentle smile. Why did it have to happen? She wondered. She always thought Kenma was a cute little kitten, but what she saw was more than just a little feline. At that moment, [L/N] realized that he was, in fact, a boy. She never saw him under such light and because of her stupid classmate, all of her thoughts were in chaos.

"Hey, who would you choose as a boyfriend?"

Her voice continued to play in her mind. She was quite lost in her thoughts that she was unable to hear the bell ring. The break ended and all of them had to return to their respective classes. Kenma stood first, he dusted his pants and offered a hand to the girl. "We should head out before anyone comes in." He stated and waited for her to reach his hand, but all he saw was her thoughtful face while she stared at his hand. He wanted to ask her if she was alright, but when she placed her hand on his, he felt her tremble and her palms had a few traces of sweat. He stared at her and she stared at him. She felt nervous under his gaze and wanted to know why he had his eyes on her.

"Kenma?" It was as if he was brought back to reality when he heard her. She was looking at him, head a little tilted and red dusted on her cheeks. He felt himself froze, she never showed such a face. He flushed but nonetheless held her hand tight to support her when she stood up. However, Kenma might have miscalculated the force required for such an act. When the girl began to stand up her weight was too much for the support he offered, both began to stumble and alas they fell on the floor.

"Ow." She muttered, she felt her back shiver against the hard and cold floor. Her head hurt a little but she suffered no more than so, luckily. When he raised her head she was met with widened golden eyes. Kenma had his arms parted, each on the side of her head, his knee settled in between her spread legs, he had her trapped under him. She blushed. He blushed. What the heck was going on, Kenma had to wonder in his thoughts. Nobody even dared to move, all they did was stare at each other. Both of them focused on their own heart beating loudly that neither noticed the other feel the same.

However, their attention deviated at the sound the door of the art room being opened. How unfortunate was the situation. They felt their breath caught in their throat and refused to let go. They were caught in the middle of an unintended intimate position.

"Ah, I guess I should let the two of you on your own for a little more." No more words were uttered after the door closed.

Kuroo felt his feet move quicker than necessary, to get away from the art classroom. He was confused, how come his voice uttered those words in such a pathetic tone? Why did his voice waver? Why did so many negative emotions overflow in him? He bit his lip, he still dashed through the school hall with no direction in mind. What infuriated him to see his best friends being so close? He should be happy for them and he was.

What a lie. He laughed at how little he felt. He was outside the school ground. It was childish to react like that, and for him out of all people.

When he graduated from his last year of middle school, he told himself to discharge the feeling he built up for his childhood friend, [L/N] [F/N], because he knew it would only cause a troublesome situation and Kuroo lived under the illusion for three whole years believing that the little butterflies in his stomach were no more but why were the unwanted feelings resurfacing once more? What made matters worse for him was that Kenma was the one who was at the receiving end of her affection. What was he to do now?

Damn it hurt.

#kenma kozume #Kuroo Tetsuro #haikyuu!!#hq #haikyuu kenma #haikyuu kuroo #haikyuu x reader

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justcallmenikki7 · 5 years ago

Text

Thantophobia

Summary: Namjoon was the number one constant for eight years. You loved him so much, too much, even through his infidelity, to scared of letting him go.

Thantophobia: the phobia of losing someone you love.

Pairing: Namjoon x Reader and Yoongi x Reader

Word Count: 5920

Warnings: Infidelity, Namjoon is a literal asshole, angst with some tiny sprinkles of fluff, Yoongi is loving you from the side, nice Yoongi, Yoongi only wants what is best for you, depression, heartbreak, cheating.

Song rec: Stay by Sugarland

Note: please just know that this is fiction and not real. I do not believe that Namjoon would actually do this to his significant other, or to any one. I had this idea for a long time, but to scared to write it. I finally did and I have had this sitting in my word doc for a while, finished, but scared to publish. This is one of my longest fan fic, and I am very proud of myself. I hope you all enjoy.

The bed was cold, something that you have been familiar with these past few months. You do not remember when it was warm and not cold.

Has it been weeks? Months? Or even a year?

You do not have an answer because the bed has been cold for as long as your heart has been broken. You do not understand why you have not changed this yet, but the thought of leaving him is impossible for you to do.

You cannot leave Kim Namjoon, not yet.

No matter how badly he has broken you, he is still the one to keep you whole. No matter how many times he has left you all alone at night just to go and warm her bed only to keep yours cold did not matter. You believe that he still loves you more than her, that is why he keeps coming back is because he loves you. He still loves you, and that is what matters.

You stare at the clock that is hung up on the wall opposite of you, waiting for him to come home. You do not know how long you have been staring at it, maybe more than a few hours? You do not know. All you know is that you are waiting for Namjoon to come home to you. To come home and to sweep you up in his arms, like he used to.

Used to.

You remember how he used to come home every evening, kissing you on the lips, a smile so radiant that it made you smile as big. You remember how he would tell you about his day, explaining how Jungkook, Taehyung, and Jimin would cause him and the other hyungs hell at work by messing up the copy machine. After that, he would try and help you with cooking dinner, only for you to cuss him out since he would trip and spill what you were making. To apologize, he would give you that innocent look that would melt away the anger and bring you happiness. You would smile, shake your head, and then give him a kiss that would eventually lead to more.

What happened?

What happened was that new intern that applied at Namjoon’s work. What happened was her beauty and intelligence, and knowledge for Namjoon’s work. You never understood much about engineering, but she did. She understood and brought such new ideas that Namjoon could not help but fall in love with. You could tell that she infatuated him so much that it led to him spending more time at work with her, than him spending time with you.

You knew that they kissed and made love because you smelt her perfume on him. You saw the red lipstick stain on his collar that he had tried hiding. You noticed the distance that he began to form between the both of you. You noticed it. Even though your best friend, Yoongi, showed you the evidence from his phone where they were all close to each other at work, you did not believe him.

But you believed that he still loved you because he was coming home to you. It may not be every night, but he still does. He still loves you right?

When Namjoon got home, you could tell that he regrets coming by the look on his face when he saw you sitting on the couch now, looking at the clock. He knew that you would be there, but he still came home so he cares, right?

“How was your day?” you asked him, a sad smile on your face and your bad attempt at wiping the tears away.

“It was fine.” He answered, avoiding looking you in the eyes.

Ignoring the pain that you felt when your husband could not look at you, you smiled anyways, “Would you like some dinner? I can fix up-“

“I’m getting a call from the office, I need-“

You cut Namjoon off. You knew what he was going to say, but you could not allow him to leave. He just got home, he cannot go back to her just yet. “Please don’t leave!” you begged, jumping off of the couch and running towards him, “-Please! You just got home,” you whimpered, bottom lip wobbling. He was going back to her. It was not a call from the office, it never was. It was always her. The woman that stole your Namjoon, the love of your life. She was the one for the cause of this. She was the one who made him fall out of love with you and in love with her. Being all alone in this house has driven you mad, but you still stayed because Namjoon comes back.

You are pathetic, you thought.

Namjoon looked torn, and that gave you a sick sense of hope. He wants to stay! “It’s important, Y/N.” He said sternly, avoiding looking in your eyes.

“More important than me?” You asked, hurt. You knew the answer, you just hoped that he would say ‘of course not’ or hoping that he would at least stay.

“I’ve got to go.” He ignored you, pushing past you so he could get to the front door.

That night, you went to bed alone, again.

************

Namjoon was home!

He came home early because he was caught up with everything at work and you knew that she was out of town to see some family. How you knew? Yoongi. You knew that Yoongi hated what is happening, but he still supported you. It tore him into pieces when he had to show you that picture of both Namjoon and her. Yoongi has always been your best friend, but his constant persistence of trying to get you to leave Namjoon is getting annoying. He told you that you need to open your eyes and see the truth.

You called him ridiculous. Yoongi does not know the love that you hold for the man who was sitting across from you at the dinner table. You scoffed to yourself, shaking your head. Namjoon loves you, he would not be here if he did not. Even though he is here with you physically, he is not here in a sense. He keeps getting onto his phone and texting someone. You ignore the smile that he holds each time his phone buzzes, trying to tell yourself that maybe it is the group chat that him and the boys have.

But would a group chat have a heart after the contacts name?

“Namjoon?” You called out, trying to ignore how his smile drops when he hears your voice.

“Yes?” He asked, voice strained.

“I love you.”

Namjoon only nodded, going back to his phone, “you too,” He uttered quietly, words were careless. It is okay, though! He still admitted to loving you, even though he did not say the two other words.

A tear slipped out of the corner of your eye. Wiping it away quickly, you got up abruptly, plate in hands. Making your way over to the sink, hands shaking, causing the silver to drop to the floor. Placing the plate down into the sink, you bent down and grabbed the silverware. Taking a deep breath, you set the silverware on top of the plate.

Throughout all of that, you notice that Namjoon did not ask if you were okay or if you needed help like he used too.

Maybe he does not love me anymore.

You scowled at yourself. Of course, he does! He is just busy texting the boys about something that needs his attention.

*********

Eight years ago, you met Namjoon through your best friend, Yoongi. Your first impression on the tall, clumsy, nerd-like man was enthrallment. You were enthralled by how smart, wise, and intelligent the man was. You were also very attracted to him too. He was handsome – his tall stature, his broad shoulders, and the dimples that always showed up whenever he smiled made you swoon. You also cannot forget how polite and gentleman-like he was towards you. You knew from the first interaction that he liked you too. The lame jokes, he bad attempts at flirting, and how he stuck with you at the party that your mutual friend had thrown.

Wherever you went, he followed.

It made you feel important, liked, something that you never had gotten in your life from the opposite gender. Of course, you had flings with other women, but they were flings. But with Namjoon, him, it felt as if it was a dream come true. That night, instead of hooking up, you both went and walked around the city until dawn was breaking through the tree lines. You both talked about anything and everything.

It felt as if you two were soulmates – soulmates that had found each other.

After that night, you and Namjoon went on several dates before he asked you to be his girlfriend. Then after a year, he got you a promise ring, and the year after that you both got married. Now, six years down the road, it is as if you do not know the man you married anymore. You do not know what is going on with his work, how he is feeling, anything.

Somehow that passion that you both had had faded away. Sometimes, you believe that it was all just a lie and a game to him. Sometimes, you question his love that he had claimed that he held for you. Because, if two people really love each other, then why would they just stop? Why would they hurt the one that they love for fun?

You do not remember the last time the both of you had a full conversation. All that you remember is the small, barely even, conversations that only have the words “fine” and “I’ve got to go.”

You blame yourself, honestly.

You blame yourself because you became bland. You became boring. You are only a woman who has a bachelor’s in psychology, allowing you to be a school counselor that quit and became a waitress at the local restaurant in town because counseling took a toll on you. Namjoon always reassured you that you do not need a job because he brings in enough income. Of course, being someone who loves being active and doing something, you laughed it off. You like having that sort of independence, being able to bring your own income in. With that, you became comfortable. Namjoon always told you that you were beautiful and that you do not need to change anything about yourself. So, you believed him. You stopped worrying about how you look cause, you felt fine with yourself, plus, Namjoon loves you. Why change? Well, you have to admit that you have gained weight. You have filled out, but who cares? Namjoon does not. or, at least you think.

Then why did he fall for someone who is prettier than you? Are you not pretty or beautiful anymore? Why do you care so much about how Namjoon feels about you?

Because he always told you how much he loves you and how beautiful he thinks you are.

But when was the last time he said those words with that passion that he always held?

You cannot remember.

Maybe it is me... you thought, looking at yourself in the mirror. He went and warm some other woman’s bed instead of yours. He does not hold the same passion for you anymore. So, why can you not leave him?

Because he is your norm. He is the one person that you have been familiar with for eight years now. You cannot throw those away so easily. But he did. But that does not matter. You love Namjoon, so much that you would die for him. You would kill for him, give him the whole world even if he broke yours so carelessly. No matter how much he has hurt you these past few months, you cannot leave him. Because you believe that love is something that you should not give up on, no matter how hard it is.

No matter how broken you are, he is still the one that can fix you. Seeing him and having him, even if it means she is having him too, it still is something. You still get to see him and be in his presence, even if it is the shortest amount of time, you are satisfied. It is so fucked up that you do not care. Nothing can cut that small amount of string that is holding you onto Namjoon still.

Until the one-day Namjoon came home with divorce papers in his hands.

“What are these?” You asked, already knowing the answer, praying to whoever is listening to make this a prank.

“I want to get a divorce, Y/N,” Namjoon declared, looking anywhere else just so he cannot look at you.

“Why? Aren’t we happy? I love you, Namjoon. Why do you want to get a divorce?” Your voice shook, a smile that is so broken on your face that Namjoon internally broke at the image.

He broke you.

“Because I am not happy anymore. I don’t love you anymore, Y/N.”

“Yes, you do. Then why do you keep coming home to me-“

“Y/N, stop being in denial and face the facts that I don’t love you anymore, I love someone else.” Namjoon cut you off with a cold tone, a hard look on his face. “Now, please sign the papers so we can get this over with.”

“I’m not signing those papers. Joonie, I love you. Please don’t leave me, please,” the desperateness that come out of you was something that you did not recognize. You do not even recognize yourself at the moment.

What kind of woman have you become to beg for someone that does not clearly love you anymore? To have them stay with you even though that they are unfaithful to you.

Namjoon sighed, rubbing his hands down his face, clearly impatient with you. “Y/N, just please, sign these papers. You knew that this was coming at some point. Can’t you see that we are not happy with one another? That we are not in love with one another?”

“But I am, Namjoon! I still love you and want you!” You yelled, hands thrown in the air, looking like a mad woman. “I know things have been hard lately, but isn’t that what marriage is supposed to be about? Hardships but also love?” You tried to reason, trying to do whatever you can to make sure Namjoon will stay. “We can go to marriage counseling! Figure out what had gone wrong and fix it!” You took a deep breath, trying to think of anything to convince him to stay, “She can’t love you like I can! I gave you everything and all of my love, and-and-”

“-I don’t want that! I don’t want to be with you anymore, Y/N! I found someone else and I want to be with her instead. I don’t want you.” Namjoon’s words broke your heart by each word that he said, destroying every last hope that you had.

“Why?” You were terrified to know the answer, but you needed to know why. Why the man that you have loved unconditionally for the past eight years, through thick and thin, even through his infidelity, does not want you anymore.

“Because I fell out of love with you. I realized after our marriage that I didn’t want to spend the rest of my life with you. I just thought that what we had at the time was all fun until I put myself in a position that I didn’t want to be in.” Namjoon did not even hesitate to answer your question.

“So, you never loved me?”

“I mean, I liked you and I thought that I loved you, but I never did.” His answer made you feel dizzy, made you feel sick to your stomach. It was silent for a few moments, until Namjoon slid the divorce papers towards, the pen on top. Shaking, you grabbed the pen and signed the papers where you needed to sign as proof that you agree to this divorce. “I bought you a small apartment downtown, it is nice and all. I made sure everything was covered.” Those were his final words before he left, leaving you all alone in this once, you thought, happy apartment.

This whole time you were lied to. This whole entire time you were living a fake fairy tale, loving someone who never once loved you. Never in your life have you ever felt so broken and abandoned. The man who you thought you knew turned out to be someone you never knew. The person he showed you was a fake. He was someone you told everything too, someone you trusted, someone you relied on for many different things.

And now, you do not know what to do with yourself.

*********

It has been three months since the divorce happened and you find out that the man you love never loved you. And in those three months, you never once left the apartment that he, out of courteously, bought for you. You do not eat much, or do much besides laying in your bed, staring up at the ceiling, trying to figure out where you went wrong. To make Namjoon realize that he did not want to spend the rest of his life with you. What did I do? You would ask yourself, wanting to know what is wrong with you. You would try and trace back to where you could have possibly messed up.

Yoongi, your best friend, would come and check up on you everyday when he got off of work. Sometimes, even, he would stay the night just to make sure that you would not do something that you would regret. And each time, he would be met with you, in bed, staring up at the ceiling quietly. It seemed, to him, that you look dead. You never moved much. The only sign of life that he had was your chest moving up and down slowly from your breathing and your eyes blinking every few seconds. Other than that, you looked dead to the world.

Yoongi would also try to make you eat something. Whether that be chicken noodle soup, some ramen, or some sort of protein/veggie that he knew that you liked. You would not tell him that sometimes the food was not good because he is not the best cook, but you would still eat a little to make him satisfied. After you were fed, he would help you (force you) to take a shower and clean yourself. While you were doing that, Yoongi took it upon himself to clean your bedroom and wash your bed sheets and blankets to get rid of the nasty odor that was there. After your shower, Yoongi would brush out the knots that were in your hair gently. All of these things that he would do for you would make your heart flutter. His small actions would have you feeling wanted.

But you would always tell yourself that he was just doing it out of kindness because you both were friends. You knew that he would never hold any sort of romantic feelings for you because if Namjoon could fake it, he had the ability to do the same.

As Yoongi was brushing your hair, you are sitting in between his legs on the floor while he was sitting on the couch. Supernatural was playing on Netflix, your favorite show besides Spongebob, in the background. The both of you were silent, enjoying the silence that was in the air. There was an occasional yelp from you whenever Yoongi would accidentally tug to hard on a knot, only for him to apologize several times, asking if you were okay. You would reassure him by saying that you were okay and that he does not need to be freaking out over such a thing. After that, silence would once fill the air again.

Once Yoongi was done brushing your hair, he would reach over the arm rest to the small coffee table besides the couch to grab the coconut oil so he could put it into your hair. You never questioned his actions, nervous to run the quiet, reserved man, off. Everyone knew that Yoongi has never been a fan of explaining himself when he does something caring, so you did not want to make him uncomfortable. When Yoongi was done putting the coconut oil into your hair, he did not get up this time. This time, he stayed sitting on the couch, confusing you greatly. Because whenever he was done with your hair, he would get up and move to a different spot onto the couch to give you space. You would never tell him that you found comfort whenever he was sitting behind you, not wanting to make things awkward. You cannot live with yourself if you lost Min Yoongi. He is the only person that you basically have left. Of course, you had your parents back home, but they never were a fan of Kim Namjoon, and you had to find out the hard way on why. So, when they found out about you two getting married, they never gave you their blessings and support – they did not even show up to the wedding.

“You’re getting your color back,” Yoongi commented, hinting at your now not as pale skin color. From Yoongi’s help and persistence, you began to get rid of the deathly pale color. You also were gaining some weight back, something that made Yoongi incredibly happy.

Looking down at your uncovered legs, you had to admit that he was right. You do not look like a ghost anymore, “huh, you’re right.”

The pale boy scoffed, “Of course I’m right, I’m a genius after all.” He teased, tone cocky.

Rolling your eyes, you huffed out a small laugh. “Sure, you are.”

It was quiet once again, only for the sounds from Dean sassing Zacharia.

“The boys are wondering how you are, the Maknae line bugging me about seeing you.” Yoongi randomly said, playing with your hair. “They miss you, so does Jin and Hoseok. They all want to know how you are doing. I don’t tell them anything besides telling them that I saw you. I figured you would like to keep that private.” He explained, rambling a little bit.

“Oh, they miss me?” You questioned, surprise evident in their tone. “I thought they would not like me anymore because of what happened…”

“Y/N, we all hate Namjoon for what he did to you. They don’t consider him as a friend once they found out about his affair with that bitch. Once I found out when he first started the affair, I hated him and lost all respect that I had for him,” Yoongi bluntly explained, “what he did to you is sick. You gave him your everything and he just toyed with you. You deserve someone who loves you unconditionally. Someone who takes care of you when you’re sick and when you are happy. Someone who will be by your side through everything. Not someone who runs off when things get hard and messy. Not someone who is a coward.” Only if you knew that he was talking about himself in that moment.

Tears began to well up in your eyes, knowing that everything that Yoongi had just said is true. But you wished that it was Namjoon. You thought that he was the one. Afterall, he was your first official relationship, so you had no idea what to do in that moment. All of those other people were flings or fuck buddies since you were too busy with school to even think about a relationship, that was until you met Kim Namjoon.

“I know, but I don’t want that anymore. How am I supposed to know that they actually care and love me? How am I supposed to know that they are being honest and not just toying with me? I won’t be able to, Yoongi. I didn’t know that Namjoon was just staying out of pity and regretting marrying me. I’m just someone who is not worth loving.” You mumbled, a sob taking over your body. Everything is hitting you all at once.

Yoongi watched you break down right in front of him. The person who held his heart in his hand for almost a decade break in front of him, making him feel completely helpless. These past eight years he regrets introducing you and Namjoon at the party he threw. That night he was going to ask you to be his girlfriend, but never did once he saw you and Namjoon interact. He knew right then and there that you had fell for him because he knew that look in your eyes. That look that said that you were attracted to someone. Then he had to watch you and Namjoon get married right in front of his eyes. Ever since then, he had to keep you at an arm's distance, knowing that he will do something that will destroy his relationship with both you and Namjoon. But once he found out about Namjoon’s affair, he had to step in. He had to get you to leave Namjoon, but your denial about him doing such a thing and belief that Namjoon still loving you killed him. He wanted to scream ‘I love you, Y/N!’ ‘I’m the one! I would never do that to you!’ but he held himself back. And once he found out about the divorce, he knew that this was his second chance to make you his. And right now, this very moment is his chance.

“But you are worth loving.” Yoongi stated, moving your hair out of your face so he could look at you in the eyes.

You look so beautiful.

“No I am not, Yoongi. If I am, why would someone just leave me if I am worth loving?” You laughed bitterly, breaking Yoongi’s heart.

“Because I love you, Y/N!” Yoongi claimed, voice raised, scaring you a little bit. “I’ve loved you ever since I met you in that stupid Humanities class where we had to do that stupid project with one another. Even when you were with Namjoon, I still loved you. I never stopped. Seeing you like this, so broken, it makes me want to kill Namjoon for what he has done to you. I want to show you that you are someone that is loved, someone that is worth fighting for. You are so beautiful, Y/N, and I will show you if you allow me too. I want to show you that you are worth it. I want to show you the things that Namjoon never showed you.” Yoongi was determined, something that Yoongi hardly shows because he hates showing his sentimental side.

His words had you stunned because the person who has been in your life for a long time, someone you that you thought that was the last person to ever hold such feelings for you, claim that he does in fact love you, was astonishing. Of course, you always had a crush on Min Yoongi, you just do not know that you could handle a relationship right now.

“Yoongi…” you began, seeing his face fall breaking your heart. “I never knew you felt like that,” you said honestly.

“I was going to ask you to be my girlfriend at my party where you met Namjoon, but I didn’t once I saw you two talking to one another,” Yoongi shrugged, trying to hide his nervousness.

“I do like you,” you ignored said party and said person, “but I cannot do a relationship right now. But I do want to try things, but I just don’t want to lead you on or hurt you,” you explained honestly. You do not know what you would do if you lost Yoongi or hurt him.

“I will wait for you, Y/N. please believe me on that,” Yoongi begged, wanting you to believe him and see that he is not like Kim Namjoon.

“Okay,” you said hesitantly. You believe that he will get bored of you after a while, seeing that you are helpless case.

*********

Each day, Min Yoongi showed you that he is willing to wait until you feel sure that you were ready to give a relationship a chance. He proved to you by taking care of you like he has been for the last three months. He made you feel loved and wanted in his own way. He would bring you your favorite flower each time that he got off work along with some take out. He would make you laugh and smile any chance that he could get. Whenever you were feeling down and hopeless, he would hug you and stay with you for the whole night, not getting any sleep even though he had work that next morning. The one thing that he would do was give you one compliment on how and why you were beautiful. After that, he would focus on such things, talking about how it makes you so beautiful and why it is apart of you. He would do all of the things that Namjoon never did – like Yoongi had promised.

But you were still scared.

You were scared that Yoongi was going to do the same thing that Namjoon had done to you. You were scared that you would lose the one person that you care most about. You were scared to lose Min Yoongi because of you not being good enough for him. You did not want to lose yourself even more like you have because of Kim Namjoon.

It was hard. It was hard to not to fall in love with Min Yoongi. You have always been a person who loves so easily, and you hate that about yourself because you find yourself finding solace in him. He brings you so much comfort and love and happiness that you find yourself steadily falling for him, something that you do not want to do. And he knows that, because Min Yoongi is not a blind man. He knows you so well that you hate it. You hate how he knows all of your little quirks, habits, and thoughts. He reads you like an opened book that he is addicted to and you can read him like an open book, too.

But you are scared that one day, he is going to read too much that he realizes that you are boring and bland. That is what Namjoon had done. He read so much that he eventually gave up on you and decided to cheat and fall out of love with you so quickly. What if Yoongi does the same?

You tell yourself that you need to get over your fear and go for it. So, you try. You try because you do not want to be living in fear that everyone will be just like Namjoon. You try because you know that if you keep living in fear, you will be pushing everyone away, only hurting yourself more in the long run. You try because you know Yoongi. You know the real Yoongi because the past month he has proven to you that he is dedicated to you. Of course, you are very scared, you always will be, but then again, love is supposed to be scary. Right now, you do not love Min Yoongi since love is something that develops over time, but you do know that you will love him soon.

That is why, you agree to go on a date with Yoongi.

Yoongi takes you out to the plaza on this chilly November night to look at all the Christmas decorations and the pretty lights that have been hung up all around the plaza. You are dressed in black leggings with your white Uggs, white snow jacket, and a white beanie. You only have on mascara and chap-stick, and Yoongi swears that you are the most beautiful human being that he has ever seen. The whole time, Yoongi keeps you by his side, his arm wrapped around your waist. To him, and to you too, it feels so natural to be tucked into his side. It feels so good and it makes your heart flutter each time you step away to get a closer look at a decoration only for him to pull you back in. It makes you feel so good, so happy and calm.

As you and Yoongi were walking around the pond that was in the middle of the plaza, Yoongi pulled you close to him, his body towering over yours. “Thank you for agreeing to go on this date with me,” Yoongi shyly thanked.

“Did you think that I wouldn’t?” You questioned, already knowing the answer.

“Well, yeah,” Yoongi chuckled, “you turned me down a few times already.”

“True, but I wasn’t ready at the time. Now I am,” you admitted, beginning to get nervous.

You could see the surprised look on the pale man’s face, making you chuckle. Realization then made its way onto his face, understanding what your words meant. A huge gummy grin took over his face, making it hard for you to not smile too. In one motion, he leaned down, cupping your chubby cheeks into his hands and he placed his lips onto yours. The kiss was slow, calm, but also needy. Yoongi kissed you as if you were his life support; wanting to get a taste of you one last time before your disappeared. The kiss was so overwhelming that it made you cry. You have never felt this type of passion and love from someone in so long that it was foreign to you, and Yoongi could sense that. He moved his hands from your face, placing them on your waist to pull you close to him. eventually, the both of you had to breath, so you both broke apart, but only to rest your foreheads against one another.

“I’ve been waiting to do that for years,” Yoongi admitted, a smile on his face. He swooped down to place another kiss on your lips, laughing when he saw you chase after his lips with your eyes closed. “You’re so beautiful.”

Blushing, you hide your face in his chest, breathing in his cologne and natural scent. It was like home to you. “Thank you, Yoongi. For everything.”

“I know that it is going to take time, and I understand. I just want you to know that I will wait for you and will go step by step until you’re comfortable. I am not going anywhere.” He promised, each word spoke with honesty.

Nodding your head, the burden of nerves on your shoulder now gone. Yoongi rested his cheek on top of your head, arms wrapped tightly around your waist. The both of you knew that things will take time to heal. The good thing is, though, is that the both of you will work with each other on this. Yoongi knew that it is going to be hard getting your ability to trust and not question everything, especially questioning yourself worth, but he is willing to do anything to prove to you that you are worth it.

Love takes time, and Yoongi is willing to take however long to prove to you that you are worth loving.

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m-oana-archive · 5 years ago

Text

A Love Too Heavy (For Just One to Hold) pt. 3

catch up on pt. 1 | pt 2.

Pairing: Sirius Black x Reader x Remus Lupin

Words: 3629

Summary: After pining after Y/N for years, Sirius finally gets the girl: the happy ending the story is supposed to end with. The only problem is the fact Sirius’ feelings for Remus still haven’t seemed to go away. But he isn’t the only one starting to question their ability to love two people at the same time.

A/N: This is the last part, and includes too many italicized words and usages of “oh” (which are almost always italicized).

requestor: @shinysilverunicorn-blog | read on AO3 | Masterlist

Y/N’s POV

How to describe Sirius and Remus? Y/N could do so simply, stating they were her closest friends, easily the two most important people in her life. But that wouldn’t include the whole of it. The way each of them were so different that both were essential to the functions of her heart.

Sirius was like a catchy tune: people got drawn to him. Even if he got annoying and overbearing, there was something that made him impossible to distance yourself from fully. And like a catchy tune, you wouldn’t expect there to be more than one layer to him, but that was wrong entirely. He wore leather and confidence, but only because he knew what it did for him, not because it matched what was held underneath. He knew about himself—his fears, hopes, failures, self-destructive tendencies—well enough to know how to look like he had none of them. Then there was Remus. The opposite. There was nothing about him that didn’t suggest introspection, from books to sweaters to tea to somehow swerving away from the Marauder reputation by being difficult to associate with petty pranks. But, while it seemed to be easy for him to dive deep into the depths of his soul, he always stood shivering at the shore before turning away, afraid of what he’d find under cold water. But with terror came beauty, and Remus couldn’t see past the first part to understand how gorgeous he was.

They were both wonderful in different ways: if Sirius was the sun, Remus was the shade that protected you. If Remus was a cup of tea, Sirius was the sugar that made it palatable. It was hard not to love one and not the other because it seemed as if both were necessary to survive.

Or, at least, that was the problem Y/N was facing.

Y/N remembered the first time she saw both. It was hard to look away from Sirius; sometimes, Y/N swore that his purpose was to be admired. But, in a similar vein, it was hard to ignore Remus. While, out of the rest of them, James was too earnest to be captivating and Peter too unsure of himself to be found attractive, Remus was quiet in the way he knew he didn’t have to give himself up to gain attention. Remus was identical to the pages he read: once you finished one, you couldn’t help flipping to the next.

She hadn’t meant, or expected, either adorations to turn into crushes. Instantly, she had wanted to be friends with the whole lot of them. Not even the cold blood was enough to turn her away; in fact, with her Slytherin ambition, showing her ability to make friendships despite the rivalry became part of the appeal. But, unbeknownst to her, feelings had started. With Remus, they were the moments he was loud and obnoxious and so bloody smart it was hard to be anything except amazed. Similarly, Sirius was at his easiest to fall in love with when he was without facades, wearing some torn-up jumper that belonged to one of “his lads”—almost always Remus—and speaking very quietly of whatever came to his mind first. They were two sides of the same coin, one that Y/N wished she could hold between her fingers, that Y/N wished she could keep.

At first, because of her platonic intention, Sirius’ obvious interest was overwhelming, like lights being flashed on in a room right after darkness, not giving eyes time to adjust. But once her eyes had adjusted, they could barely look at anyone else, envision anyone else kissing her; holding her hand; laying on her bed with her, bodies forming shapes that fit one another perfectly.

Remus was chillingly indifferent. When Y/N stated her wishes that someone would ask her to Hogsmeade—subconsciously, this was a complaint that Remus wasn’t doing so—Remus brushed it off casually, saying that someday someone would come along who would treat her right. The heartbreak of it made her realize how deep her emotions were for him; she was willing to waste her life trying to catch an unreachable moon just so Remus wouldn’t have to endure being transformed by it every month. And, when she inevitably failed, at least he’d know he was worth a whole lifetime.

So she picked Sirius, not through a choice, but through a lack of one. Because, if Y/N truly had her way, she would choose both.

But apparently, Remus wouldn’t. Not based on what he had just said to her, moments after some stupid, hopeful part of Y/N thought they might have kissed.

The sounds of the words Remus had said were gone, but the weight pulled the room down, including everything inside of Y/N. Her soul felt like the library: all the brightness was sucked out except for two small lights that weren’t enough to make her feel alive anymore.

“Oh.” She meant to say it, but she whispered it instead. Or sighed it.

For the first time in a long time since meeting and getting to know Remus, her eyes did not want to meet his face.

Silence followed. A long one; so long that it transcended tension and peace to turn into an overwhelming shallowness, the same kind Y/N felt inside of her chest as she stood waiting. She knew instinctively that Remus’ mouth was opening and closing above her, trying sentences in his head before realizing he didn’t want to say them out loud. Y/N wished he would have planned the sentence he had said before with that kind of carefulness. Since when was Remus so spontaneous, anyway? When did he make the decision to abandon so much of what made him him, even if it was in the name of honesty?

The first sound was Remus’ swallow. Then, his hand brushing through his hair. Then, his voice, saying, “I didn’t mean that to say I don’t want you to be with him. I’ve never seen him happier.” There was such sadness in the admission, the kind of sadness that is made of happiness. The kind of sadness that is made of love.

Instantly, something within Y/N shifted. Anger disappeared. She looked up to Remus and she could see it on his face, on the purse of his lips and twisting of his eyes and lock of his jaw: Remus really was in love with Sirius. Or at least could love him. If given the chance.

“I can’t just…” Y/N started, drifting, struggling to say anything because words felt so loud. “You’re… you’re my best friend. How am I supposed to just sit around dating him in front of you in good conscience? You’ve put me in quite a position here. Either I hurt you until you get over him, or I hurt him to spare you.”

“Please, don’t do anything for me,” Remus automatically replied. “Really, that wasn’t a cry for pity—”

“Then why the hell did you tell me that?”

Remus tugged on his hair. “I don’t know! I just couldn’t bear lying to you anymore!”

“Then want to know something else true?” Y?N said, despite her stomach telling her to stop talking, saying that this was a terrible idea, one rooted out of nothing except anger and childishness. “I fucking, I fucking had feelings for you, Remus. But you were so fucking indifferent, always brushing me aside, making me feel like I was just another person to you, no one special. I stayed in. I stayed for you. Struggled silently, hurting every damn day, just because I knew you didn’t mean it. Why couldn’t you have just waited until… until…”

Her words faded into a tense silence. Remus lifted an eyebrow at her. “Until what? Until I got over him?”

“Yeah.”

“Why didn’t you just say it? I don’t…”

Remus was looking at her, and she was doing everything to collapse into herself, to not let her red cheeks be noticed, to make them disappear. “Oh.” He paused. A single moment encapsulating a thousand different ones. “Y/N, do you still have feelings for me?”

Y/N laid her hands out in front of her, her body ready to express a logical counter argument her mind could not provide. Her stature sunk.

“What does it matter?”

“It matters because…” Remus hesitated, hands still in his hair, running through it desperately. “Okay, if we’re being very honest here, which we are, I need you to know that, um, a lot of the reason I’m not dating Sirius is because I’m conflicted between him and someone else, someone else who is also in a relationship… and it could work, but I… I’m not sure…”

“How to politely ask me to remove myself from my own relationship?” Y/N offered.

Remus’ face hardened. “No,” he said. It was stern, absolute. All at once, Y/N understood.

Just as suddenly, there was a gasp of wood from the side. Y/N turned to the door, finding Sirius there. He had a look of confusion nearing pain on his face and Remus’ jumper on.

Oh, Y/N realized. Oh.

If the rumors and legends were true, this could have been the last moment of her life: everything was coming back in flashes. There were fuzzy, alcohol-smudged scenes of parties, where, in something she misnamed as drunken dumbfuckery, Remus and Sirius were dancing with bodies close together, laughter taking up every part of their mouths. Times that she would see Sirius leaning in close to whisper something in Remus’ ear, Remus’ ears turning pink regardless of how many times it must have been done before. There were all the times that Y/N turned around in class to meet Remus’ eyes, just to find they were already on her. When she would borrow Remus’ jumper from Sirius and Remus wouldn’t protest; “It fits you,” he had said, which she had taken far too literally. The fact that Sirius wore that jumper more than Remus, yet Remus would never protest. The late nights of crying herself to sleep, afraid that she had made the wrong choice, because she wanted not one, but both of them.

She looked back to Remus first. He was already looking at her. “Wait here,” she whispered, fighting the urge to kiss him on the cheek nonchalantly before turning and walking towards Sirius.

This was it. This had to be it.

Y/N got to Sirius faster than she had meant too, but had no time to feel self-conscious about it. “I need you alone for a second,” she said. Her hands were on his arm, redirecting him out into the corridor before he had time to protest.

Once they were alone, door closed, Sirius’ body instinctively adjusted into an argument stance: there was a rolling back of his shoulders, a cocking of his chin, a tense spot in his jaw, a crossing of his arms. “You were real fucking close in there, Y/N. In dim light, after six hours together… he’s not your boyfriend! I am! I barely even see you today and when I finally find you you’re almost kissing him.”

Y/N waited, trying to cover the ache in her chest with an unbothered expression. She knew she needed to apologize, but had to wait: they didn’t have time for this argument right then. They might never have to have it again, too, if she was right. She hoped she was right.

“You have a right to be jealous of him,” she admitted. “But, let me ask you something: are you jealous of me?”

Sirius’ muscles softened, or, maybe, they buckled under the pressure of him having been uncovered. It was too soon to know, too similar to tell. He opened his mouth, then closed it. The anger in his eyes was transformed into pain.

Y/N reached to touch his face. The way he melted into her touch was enough to break her heart, again. “Sirius. I’m not asking about what this means for us right now. I just need to know, honestly, how you feel about Remus.”

“It’s complicated,” he frowned.

“It might complicate, but it’s not complicated. Even if things change because of how you feel, I will always love you so much. It would be unfair to ask you to tell me the truth and then get mad at you for doing it.”

With a deep exhale underneath Remus’ jumper and his lips, warm, against the side of Y/N’s hand, Sirius said, “I have feelings for him. So many. It’s painful.”

I know. God, I know, Y/N thought to herself. How could anyone meet Remus and not be madly, irresistibly, unforgivably in love with him? It was foolish of her to think she could not love him; it was nice to know that someone else had also been equally mindless. Perhaps this was something that made Sirius and Y/N so compatible.

“It’s okay,” Y/N decided upon saying. She brushed her thumb against his stubbled cheek. “I just need to know, does this change how you feel about me? What dating me means?”

Sirius’ eyes met hers instantly. “Merlin, no. I’m still so ridiculously into you, too, which is why I never told you about Remus—because I usually tell you about everything—because I didn’t know what it meant. I was so confused. I still am.”

“Sirius.” She stepped closer to him, feeling her eyes fill with tears, either from understanding his sadness or from realizing both of them were helping create it for so long. “I know.”

His eyes were angry again, despite the fact hers were wet.

“I know. I understand. God, Sirius, I have feelings for him too! And I hid it for so long, because I thought he didn’t feel the same, and I liked you so much, and I didn’t know I didn’t have to choose between the two of you.”

“You didn’t? You don’t?” Sirius asked with such shock, it came out as a scream.

A relief, golden as sunlight, filled Y/N so deeply that she could only shake her head in response, too overwhelmed to do anything else. The tension that was held inside of her for so long was finally undone and all she could see was how possible everything was now.

“He told me he feels like we do about him. It’s been so simple! All of this time, Sirius. It’s absolutely ridiculous.”

Sirius layered his hand on top of Y/N’s, tracing the curvature of her knuckles. “I want to barge in there and kiss that fucker right now,” he admitted, a laugh blossoming out of Y/N’s mouth. “But I want to ask: are you 100 percent on this? I know we just started dating, and I always felt like I was so much more eager than you, but you met me there. But this seems a lot… bigger. I don’t want you to go beyond what you can handle for me. You can still have me. No matter what you say. I promised I’d stick by you.”

Y/N pulled herself up to Sirius, kissing him, mouth absorbing the weight of the words he just said, but knowing this was something good. She pulled away sooner than she wanted to. Sirius looked both more rooted and more disheveled. “I know, Sirius. That’s why I’m okay with this. I trust you. I know you won’t push me aside. And I won’t leave you, either. I love you, and this is about all three of us, not any two of us.”

“As long as Remus is comfortable,” Sirius piped up.

“As long as Remus is comfortable,” Y/N agreed.

They both looked over at the closed library door. Something that was keeping Remus outside all of this. A threshold he’d have to be invited to cross, and would want to.

Sirius was the first to ask the looming question. “How do we…”

“You go,” Y/N offered, automatically getting his eyes on her for the demand of it. “This has been forever for you, hasn’t it? Since you met.”

“Yeah.” It was soft. He was flustered, a blush creeping up his neck, as if Y/N hadn’t seen him do much more embarrassing things. Loving Remus Lupin was not something to be embarrassed about.

“Then you deserve to be the one. Plus, he’s your best mate. And I’ve had to deal with him for six bloody hours.”

Sirius laughed, and everything felt better. “Okay,” he breathed. “Wish me luck?”

Y/N wanted to yell at him, knock some sense into him. He’s bloody in love with you! she wanted to shout. But it was too true to be cocky. Something struck her here: the fact that, while deeply in love with the both of them and utterly confused, Remus had to hear Sirius say this before asking Y/N out. Sadness kept finding its way in, as much as it felt wrong, as much as Y/N refused it.

“Good luck, love,” Y/N said. He released her hand, slid away from her, slipped between the doors, and was gone.

It was difficult, those minutes that felt like years, spent waiting for Sirius to explain himself to Remus. But it felt right. She had so much time with both of them separately that it was their time to come to terms for what this meant for them. There was also something so private in the intimacy of a first kiss; if they wanted to share theirs now, Y/N felt as though they should have the room to do so. And what place is better than a dark, musty library, as secret in the night as their love for one another, filled with as much logic as Remus and as much mystery as Sirius?

When the door finally opened, only one body emerged. It was Remus. He looked different, like something that was knocked over and finally set upright. He was smiling in a devilish way. Y/N knew instantly that they had kissed; it was the implantation of Sirius’ lips on his that had left his mouth hanging in the same crooked way that Sirius’ always does.

“Hi,” she offered, lamely. The result was rather surprising: Remus' smile straightened and softened. It was so true she almost had to look away from him. Again.

Remus came up to her, close enough to do so much—her mind was raking through possibilities—but failing to; she knew from six years of knowing him that this wasn’t due to anything except respect for her. She loved him more for it. Somehow.

“Sirius told me everything,” he said. “And I’d be the happiest person in the entire world if I got to have both of you.”

Y/N understood Sirius’ earlier sudden shyness: hearing Remus say that made her knees weaken and the words she had planned to say jumbled up inside of her head. The only thing she could think to respond with was, “How was the kiss?”

Remus’ smirk was back. “How’d you know?”

“You looked triumphant and cocky. It was obvious.” Remus laughed, hand finding the back of his neck to rub it. She felt the need to add, “It makes sense, considering how long you waited for that kiss.”

“Well…” he took a step in, close enough his mouth was almost touching Y/N’s, but still failing to. “There’s still one more I’m waiting for. If you’ll have me.”

“Yeah,” she said, already breathless. “Of course I will.”

Y/N’s heart was beating impossibly fast as Remus stepped close, cupped her cheek, and led his mouth onto hers. She thought she’d have the ability to compare his kiss to Sirius’. She thought wrong; it was too consuming—not in the intensity but the depth of it, the realness of it—it was impossible for her to think about anything except the fact she was kissing Remus Lupin. She was kissing Remus Lupin. It had worked. It had all worked out. She had Remus’ right hand on her cheek, the left trailing up the back of her head. She had his sweater in the clutches of her fists, a silent ask for more. She had Remus’ tongue in her mouth—she had Remus’ goddamned tongue in her mouth—turning her stomach into a night sky riddled with fireworks. It was too surreal to be real. But it was.

When they parted, they were both breathless. Y/N released her fists to allow her fingers to instead draw random shapes across Remus’ sturdy chest. She felt happy, at peace. Yet there was still something missing.

“Sirius,” she called from over Remus’ shoulder. “Open that damn door and get over here!”

He appeared instantaneously. Without explanation, he spelled the lights off inside of the library, and produced a key from his pocket which he then used to lock the door.

Sirius came up to them, attaching himself to Remus’ side in the same way he always had, but leaning into him more than usual, as if to say this is how I always have felt, but now I can show it. Y/N scanned both of their faces, two beautiful boys, scarred and wonderful in their own ways, and hers.

“Walk me home?” she asked. They both nodded, starting off into the night. A natural formation befell the three of them: Remus standing in the center, Sirius leaning into him in a way that demanded Remus to wrap his arm around his waist, and Y/N holding Remus’ hand, his thumb stroking her palm. All around them, evening was whispering, with cricket chirps, light breezes, and clouds shifting the moonlight from above. It was soft and calm and real, real, real. Somehow. It was real.

⬥ ⬥ ⬥ ⬥ ⬥ ⬥ ⬥ ⬥

Taglist (let me know if you want to be added): @astertist @beskarjedi @bluemadcnna @boring-viola @carolinesbookworld @finnofamerica @fortisfiliae @gabriel-r3ap3r-reyes @gryffndor @jamcspotters @just-some-nerd @lonelyheart-jadedsoul @neewtmas @portkeys-and-prose @siriusement @siriuslyimmoony @sly-vixen-up2nogood @swellwriting @the-apple-princess @theboywhocriedlupin @who-cares-unknown @woakiees @wzardings @samcycle @luckygirl144

#mine #writing #moonlit members #carlysfamily #sirius x reader #remus x reader #sirius black x reader #remus lupin x reader #sirius black x remus lupin #remus lupin x sirius black #sirius x remus #remus x sirius #remus x sirius x reader #sirius x remus x reader #reader x remus x sirius #reader x sirius x remus #hp fanfic #hp fanfiction

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husbandomail-archive · 4 years ago

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how about the kind of hugs your fav pokemon boys give? who gives the strongest hugs, who's the happiest to give a hug and who's the most awkward? go wild my dude

Anon I am s orry I got this carried away; a lot of these boys have been relatively forgotten, so I’ve included links to character pages for anyone who doesn’t recognize them

Unsurprisingly, Zero isn’t too big on physical affection; he never got a lot of it, and it’s just not something he needs much of. That being said, he never pushes you away if you initiate— his hugs are incredibly shy at first, not really knowing where to put his hands or how close he’s allowed to hold you. Once he’s more comfortable, his favorite hugs are ones where he can wrap his arms around your waist, pulling you close enough for him to lay his chin on your shoulder or nuzzle his face into your neck, so you can’t see how he’s blushing.

Although shy about romantic affection, Keith’s hugs are all-encompassing. His early years as a Ranger were terrifying and filled with loss, and you can still sense it when he touches you— he always clings to you as if you’ll be torn from his grasp at any moment. For whatever reason, he always finds himself humming when he hugs you, swaying gently together and running his hands through your hair.

In general, Jackie’s hugs are cheerful and casual; he’s a typically happy man, so it’s not uncommon for him to wrap his strong arms around you and lift you into a twirl, laughing all the while. He loves surprising you with hugs when you’re obviously not expecting it, ghosting his hands up and down your sides and laughing when you shiver at his touch.

Contrary to his [obviously fake] name, Ice’s hugs are incredibly warm. He tries to keep up his cool facade by just wrapping one arm around your shoulders— but his clothes are so soft, and his cologne is so comforting, it’s nearly impossible not to press yourself up against him further. He gets incredibly flustered, but tries to hide it behind his typical smarmy attitude, because of course you’d want to be in his arms.

Red Eyes is also a naturally warm man. He doesn’t think about physical affection often, generally limiting it to squeezing your hand on occasion— but the times when you do end up in his arms? It’s surprising from a man of his stature, but he holds you like you’re made of glass, and he looks at you like you hung the moon. When he’s parked on the floor or perched at his desk, he really doesn’t mind you climbing into his lap so he can wrap his arms around you from behind.

Eusine’s a man who knows how to put on a show; it isn’t long before he learns exactly what parts of you he can squeeze to get the best reactions. Although he’s typically a bit of a dweeb, when he goes for a hug, he always tries to be suave and manly and romantic— and then he digs his fingers into your hips, and his hands start wandering, and you’re gonna be in his arms for quite awhile now.

Barry’s hugs are just like the rest of him— sweet and enthusiastic. He never really learned to slow down, so oftentimes he’ll still be charging full-force at you like when you were kids— nowadays, though, instead of knocking you over, he swoops you into his arms and twirls you. He also bounces on his toes when he’s really excited— and if you’re in his arms, he’s excited. Even in your quietest moments together, he radiates energy.

Hugs from Piers are always pretty toned-down. Because of his general image, he doesn’t get much sweet attention like that, and it gets him incredibly flustered. He always holds you a bit loosely, so that you can pull away at any time, because he doesn’t want to make you uncomfortable— but on the rare occasions that you start to doze off in his arms, he’ll run his hands through your hair and sing for you quietly.

Ilima’s hugs are light and polite, wrapping his arms around your waist and squeezing you closely for just a quick moment. He’s always very casual about them; it’s a way of greeting, it’s friendly reassurances, he’ll give them out whenever you ask for one. More intimate hugs, though— he’s incredibly teasing, with his fingers slipping just far enough under your clothes to make you squeak.

Volkner’s hugs are a bit shy— he doesn’t initiate them often because he’s not always sure when they’re welcome. Despite that, they’re always incredibly strong and safe; he holds you tightly to his chest, leaning his forehead against yours, combing his fingers through your hair, running his other hand up and down your back. If he’s gonna do it at all, he’s gonna do it right.

Professor Sycamore is a very friendly and physically-oriented man. Every time he sees you he absolutely has to hug you. It’s always enthusiastic, he’s always happily complimenting you, and his scent— is it cologne or is it natural?— is intoxicating. Even after he’s pulled away, he tends to keep his arm around your hips or your shoulders without thinking too much about it.

As he begins settling into a more “normal” life, N comes to realize that he adores your hugs specifically. He loves moments when you come up behind him and wrap your arms around him and press your forehead right between his shoulder blades. He’s still a bit shy and awkward about returning them, but he’s quick to memorize your reactions to wherever he puts his hands. Also, a habit he picked up from being with Pokémon— he does a lot of nuzzling. Holding you or being held by you really helps ground him and reassure him that he’s truly human.

#pokemon #n harmonia #rival barry #gym leader piers #gym leader volkner #augustine sycamore #trial captain ilima #trainer eusine #ice (ranger)#red eyes (ranger)#jack walker #ranger keith #trainer zero #curtis #pokemon ranger #headcanons #imagines #I got really carried away #anon

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bonkers-4-hatter · 5 years ago

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@purpledisneyluv93 asked: I've been binge watching Soul Eater and rediscovered my love for Franken Stein. Please do some headcannons for him and chubby s/o cause I seriously can't find jack.💖

Of course hun! Yaasss! I love Stein so much! I hope you like it!

---

Even though many say that he is heartless, that’s not the case when it comes to you.

You were a new aide hired to assist Stein and the moment you walked through his doors, he felt something foreign to him, that he’d never felt before.

He didn’t want to dissect you, which is his usual feeling or first thought when he meets someone. No, he wanted to know more about you, it scared him at first; these new feelings, but your smile eased him a bit.

At first, he’ll be hell bent on ignoring you, being rude to you and just being a total ass because he’s not used to these feelings at all and he’s scared about not understanding them.

He’ll take jabs at your weight and stature and how you do specific things for him. Yes, it hurts you and your confidence, but you keep going with a smile on your face.

It would continue this way for months and Stein would get irritated beyond belief. He wanted you to quit and leave so he’d stop feeling whatever the hell he was feeling, but you’d just give him that damn smile and continue on with your duties.

One day he snapped and almost dissected you on the spot.

He couldn’t take the warm feeling he was feeling every time he saw you and you just took his insults with a smile as usual, but instead of letting you go, he slammed your soft body onto the dissecting table as he held you down onto it a scalpel near your eye.

“S-Stein, w-w-what’re you doing, stop, please!”

Your voice was filled with fear as the scalpel hovered above your eye as you awaited him to start slicing you up.

Stein hesitated, his heart clenching at the tears that ran down your chubby cheeks. Without another thought, he threw the weapon to the side and slid his hands up to cup your cheeks as he started to describe the feelings he was feeling ever since you came into his life.

After the whole ordeal of Stein almost cutting you up and him having a heart to heart talk with you, you’ve been helping him with his feelings and needless to say, it was working great.

You both started hanging out together in your free time, mostly spending time at your place since it had more privacy than Stein’s and it had a much more homey feeling.

Having accepted the new feelings toward you, he was open to touching and would even make the first moves on certain aspects.

You were curled up on the couch with him one night, under a blanket as a movie was playing, a romantic comedy of course and during a specific romantic part Stein tapped your shoulder. Turning to see what he wanted, he captured your lips in a sweet kiss, catching you off guard, but you were happy to return it.

He also enjoys wrapping his arms around your soft middle, the softness really makes him relax a bit and the warmth you provide is an added bonus.

The first time he said he loved you was after the school was attacked and he thought he lost you in the devastation, but found you hiding in his lab behind some equipment, safe and sound, but a bit shaken up.

“(Y/N)!” Stein quickly gathered you in his arms, you were bruised and bleeding a bit, your clothing torn and burned, but you were alive and in one piece. “I thought I lost you...I would’ve lost it if you were gone, I love you too much.”

You both froze at his words. Stein only buried his face into your neck refusing to look at you as a silence fell upon you both.

“I love you to Stein.”

You both just stayed there on the crumbled floor, embracing one another and enjoying each other’s presence.

#q #queue #soul eater #soul eater headcanons #soul eater stein #stein headcanons #chubby s/o #chubby #chubby headcanons #chubby reader

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hopesilverheart · 4 years ago

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Title: I loved your colours (before I loved you) Artist: @calliartss Rating: Explicit (Chapter 10 only) Pairings: Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, Alec Lightwood & Clary Fray, Clary Fray/Isabelle Lightwood Word Count: ~95k Summary: Magnus Bane is a journalist who's always dreamed of modelling for Lightwood Fashions. When the CEO Alec Lightwood starts looking for new models for their spring collection, he jumps on the occasion.

In the meantime, Alec Lightwood is struggling with the idea of finally announcing his role as co-designer. When Magnus Bane strolls into his life, Alec is torn between keeping his secret or throwing all caution to the wind.

This fic was created for the Malec Discord Mini Bang 2020.

Chapter 9: To be your muse

“Mister Bane!”

Magnus froze, as his mind registered the voice calling out for him. He had only heard Maryse Lightwood speak a few times from afar, but it had been enough for him to know he should be at least somewhat terrified of the woman. Doubly so considering the fact that he was actively lying to her and working as her Head Editor. If one person could ruin things for Magnus, it was Maryse Lightwood.

“Mrs. Lightwood,” he said, a smile plastered onto his face, as he turned around to face the imposing woman. Maryse never looked anything less than perfect, and Magnus had to admit he found it both impressive and incredibly intimidating. “Did you need me for something?”

“I did,” the woman smiled, the gesture managing to come off as both warm and surprisingly dangerous. “I know you’re a very busy man in between your job here and your position on the modelling team, but I believe we have a few things to discuss about your future within the company.”

The mere mention of his future had Magnus tensing up unconsciously. Ever since he had joined the Lightwood Enterprises, he had tried his best to forget about the circumstance under which he had been hired, as well as the lies he had to tell along the way. He had tried to act as though everything was alright, and even Isabelle tended to forget that he wasn’t technically her boss yet. It was a strange dynamic, and Magnus knew it could all come crumbling down at a moment’s notice.

Needless to say, the last thing he wanted to do with his afternoon was have a strenuous conversation with Maryse Lightwood about his future. Unfortunately, he didn’t exactly have a choice.

“Of course,” he said pleasantly, hiding his trembling hands behind his back and hoping the woman didn’t pick up on his anxiety. “Did you want to do this in my office, or should we go up to-”

“My office is far more comfortable,” Maryse cut him off, pressing the button for the building’s top floor, staying silent as the elevator slowly took them far away from Magnus’ safe space.

He had purposefully been avoiding the top floor, not wanting to come across Maryse or bother Alec whilst he was hard at work on the business side of things. In hindsight, perhaps he should have at least gotten himself acquainted with the higher-ups’ living quarters, since it would have made this entire experience at least a tiny bit less nerve-wracking.

By the time they reached Maryse’s office, Magnus was sweating profusely and finding it hard to breathe. He had tried to catch a glimpse of Alec as they walked past the floor’s numerous offices, but he didn’t even know where his boyfriend worked. Yeah, he really needed to visit Alec’s office as soon as possible.

If he still had a job by the end of the day, of course.

“There’s no need to look so nervous, Magnus,” Maryse chuckled, looking at him amusedly. “Can I call you Magnus? I usually try to avoid using first names with my highly-ranked employees, but we both know you’re not just a random employee. Isabelle speaks very highly of you.”

“Ah, yes,” Magnus cleared his throat, calming down slightly as he took a seat across from Maryse and took in her relaxed stature. She didn’t look like a woman about to fire her temporary Head Editor, which meant there was a chance Magnus wasn’t on the verge of getting sacked for lying about his past. “Isabelle is a wonderful friend, and I couldn’t be more thankful to have her on my side. She’s quite talented too. I have to admit I’m curious as to why she didn’t get the Head Editor position.”

“She’s just not cut out for it,” Maryse answered easily. “I love my daughter, and I’m sure she’ll make a wonderful CEO when it’s time for me to step down, but she’s happy where she is right now. The last thing she needs is an extra set of responsibilities. You, on the other hand, seem to be handling everything superbly.”

Magnus blushed lightly at the praise. He had certainly been trying his best to keep the media team under control and deliver the best issues Lightwood Media had ever seen. He hoped Lorenzo was seething on the other side of town.

“Isabelle isn’t the only one who admires your work ethic,” Maryse continued, raising her eyebrows at Magnus and letting her lips curl into a small smirk. “My son seems to think you’re the best thing to ever happen to this company. I have reason to believe he may be a little bit biased, but his assessment is not entirely wrong. My company is doing better than ever thanks to you, Magnus and I’m not too prideful to admit it.”

“Thank you,” Magnus said sincerely. He may have originally taken the Head Editor position as a way of getting back at Lorenzo, but he truly did love his new job. He loved how much freedom it gave him, how much control he had over the final drafts, how much easier it was to work mainly for himself rather than someone else… His experience as a model was delightful but becoming Head Editor had reminded him of why he loved journalism so much in the first place.

“I’m sure it’ll come as no surprise to you that we wish to hire you full time,” Maryse continued, chuckling when Magnus’ jaw dropped down momentarily before he managed to school his features into something a little more dignified. “Our previous Head Editor left behind more messes than he was worth, and you’ve already managed to clean them all up. You’re dedicated, punctual, and a fantastic writer. We would be lucky to keep you, if that’s still something you’d be interested in.”

“If that’s- Yes! Yes, absolutely!” Magnus exclaimed. “This job means the world to me, and I would be honoured to work here permanently. Obviously, the next month or so is going to be a little tight in terms of scheduling, since I also have to handle the modelling side of things, but I’ll be completely focused on the editing side of things as soon as the spring collection has been released.”

“Yes, I assumed you would say something like that,” Maryse smiled wryly. “Isabelle has worked under me for far longer than you have, Magnus, and I know how hectic things can get the month before the release. Rest assured that the rest of the team will help as best as they can whilst you deal with the fashion team.”

“Thank you,” Magnus said emphatically, letting out a breath he hadn’t been aware he’d been holding. “The workload is much higher than I anticipated, and I know it’s going to get a lot worse before it gets better.”

“Ah, yes, Alec has always been a harsh taskmaster,” Maryse chuckled. “He has a great team, but they tend to work themselves into the ground more often than not because of his expectations.”

“Well they’re- they’re mostly Clarissa’s expectations, actually,” Magnus frowned. Alec may have been the company’s CEO, but he didn’t have nearly as much say in fashion matters as Clary did, given that the collection was her handiwork. “But yes, they definitely make us work a lot. Not that I’m complaining, since I actually love working with the other models.”

When he looked back up at Maryse after his impromptu speech, he found her staring at him strangely, as though she couldn’t quite understand what he had been saying. He hadn’t thought he’d been particularly unclear, but he also wasn’t in her spot, so…

“I’m sorry, did I say something wrong?” He gulped. He hadn’t meant to make it sound like Clary was a tough boss; he loved the woman, he really did. God, had he ruined his chances by accidentally criticising someone whom Maryse probably saw as family? “Clarissa is great, really. She’s an amazing person, a wonderful friend, and her designs are pure genius…”

“You didn’t say anything wrong, Magnus,” Maryse assured him, waving his concerns away. “I just… You only mentioned Clary. I assumed Alec would have told you about her secret partner by now, since the two of you are so… close.”

“He would never betray her partner like that,” Magnus sighed, thinking about the very few times he had tried to get an answer out of his boyfriend. Every time he mentioned it, Alec clammed up and told him he would find out when the time was right, so Magnus had eventually given up. “He seems to think it should be up to them to reveal themselves, and… Well, I suppose that makes sense. Besides, Alec would never give someone’s secrets up just because the two of us are dating.”

“So you are dating!” Maryse beamed, her eyes lighting up excitedly. “I didn’t want to assume, and he so rarely talks to me these days, but I thought the two of you looked rather close. Oh, I’m so happy for you both!”

“Thank… you?” Magnus said slowly, wondering what kind of alternate dimension he had stepped into. Maryse Lightwood was infamous for her impassive features and her inability to show affection even to her children, and this was… This was more than a little disconcerting. “I’m very happy for us too. I’m sorry, maybe I shouldn’t have said anything. What if Alec wanted to tell you himself?”

“Alec would have never said anything,” Maryse scoffed, unintentionally making Magnus’ heart clench painfully. Some of his hurt must have shown on his face, because she immediately shook her head and smiled at him reassuringly. “Not because he doesn’t care about you or is embarrassed by you or any of that nonsense. Alec just doesn’t really talk to me like he used to. He’s a busy man and he has plenty of people to talk to, so I usually only find out about his boyfriends when he decides to bring them along to a family event.”

Magnus bit down on his lip to stop himself from asking about Alec’s past relationships. They hadn’t been deliberately avoiding the topic, but it had never come up and Magnus was starting to get curious. Almost everything pointed at Alec having very little romantic experience, and yet Maryse spoke as though he had been in at least a few relationships.

However, that was something he needed to discuss with Alec himself, not his mom. His mom, who also happened to be Magnus’ boss. On the list of people Magnus should be talking to about his relationship with Alec, he was almost certain that Maryse was at the very bottom. The very, very bottom.

“I’m just happy he has someone like you in his life,” Maryse continued softly. “My son is a wonderful man but has a tendency to cut himself off from the rest of the world and close himself to other people. It’s nice to see that he can let himself go from time to time. Tell me, how long have the two of you been together?”

“A few weeks?” Magnus replied, a hint of uncertainty in his tone. Truth be told, he hadn’t really taken the date into account when he had asked Alec out. They had both been busy with work and the collection, and Magnus had barely known what day of the week it was, let alone what day of the month they had first gone out on. However, he was almost certain they were coming up on a month of dating. Something along those lines. “We’ve only been on a few dates because of work, but I believe it’s been at least three weeks.”

“Very nice,” Maryse grinned, clapping her hands together loudly. “Then it’s definitely not too early for me to invite you to our monthly family dinner. The children and I try to meet up once in a while, and our March invitation is coming up in a week and a half, so you should join us.”

“Oh, I- I wouldn’t want to impose,” Magnus chuckled nervously. He had never been good at family dinners, and he doubted the Lightwood ones were any nicer than the ones he’d been to in the past. “I know Alec and Isabelle are always busy, and I assume their brothers are the same way, so I wouldn’t want to take away what little time you have with them.”

And he really, really didn’t want to deal with all the Lightwoods at once. Alec was wonderful, of course, and Magnus would never turn down an opportunity to spend time with him, but the others? Isabelle was intense on a good day, and if she was there Clary would probably be too, which meant too much girl talk for Magnus to handle. As for the other two Lightwood siblings; Max was apparently still young enough to be in high school, and Magnus had never been great with teenagers, and Jace – who worked at the coffee shop down the street – seemed to be constantly suspicious around him.

All in all, definitely not a good plan. Especially not if Maryse was going to be there, reigning over them like a terrifying matriarch and interrogating Magnus and Clary about their intentions towards her children. Not even Simon’s likely presence – considering his relationship with Jace – was enough to make Magnus want to attend such a horrendous event.

“Oh please, it’s really not a problem,” Maryse smiled. “I’m sure Alec would be more than happy to have you there, and I hear that you’re quite friendly with both Clary and Simon, so I’m sure you’ll fit in just fine.”

“Right, yes, that sounds amazing,” Magnus lied through his teeth, hoping he didn’t look half as uncomfortable as he felt. “I’ll talk to Alexander and he’ll keep you updated on whether or not I can make it. With all this added workload and the photoshoots coming up, I’m going to be pretty busy, but I’ll try to fit the dinner into my schedule!”

“Perfect,” Maryse grinned, her teeth glinting almost ominously, as though she were daring Magnus to bail on the dinner. “I know you have an important photo shoot with Vogue coming up, but I made sure to plan everything after that, and the March issue should be ready by then, right?”

“Absolutely,” Magnus grit out. Of course the woman had planned everything to work with all of their schedules. Usually, he would have been impressed, but given how little he wanted to attend the Lightwood family dinner, he was going to stew in his frustration for a while longer. “Anything to make Alexander happy.”

“Of course,” Maryse nodded, her smile gentling minutely. “I really am happy for the two of you. I may not know you very well, but if Isabelle thinks you’re good enough for her brother, then I don’t doubt that you are.”

“I don’t think anyone is good enough for Alexander,” Magnus sighed. “But I’m trying my best.”

And he was. He knew he had done some dubious things in his life, knew he was lying to Alec by omission every time they talked about his job, knew he wasn’t the best at juggling his job and his relationship, but he was trying. He wanted to make Alexander happy, and if that meant putting in a little extra work and living on coffee and three hours of sleep after a date, then so be it.

“I’m sure you are,” Maryse hummed. “I’ll have your final contract drafted and on your desk in two weeks maximum. I need to go over the specifics with the board and talk with a few people about your placement, but I doubt anyone will complain about having someone so competent on the team.”

“Sounds good to me,” Magnus smiled, feeling a lot less unsettled now that they were talking about his job again, and not his relationship with Alec. “Thank you for giving me a chance in the first place, Mrs. Lightwood. I know you probably had plenty of candidates, so thank you for listening to your daughter and letting me prove my worth to you.”

“My ex-husband passed up on your talent once already, Magnus,” Maryse said softly. “I wasn’t about to make the same mistake. There’s something to be said about people who get turned down from their dream job but come back even stronger. Robert rejected you, and yet you still came back to Lightwood Fashions. Isabelle’s recommendation is what put you on my radar, but you got this job all by yourself, Magnus.”

“Really?” Magnus gaped. He should have known the woman wouldn’t hire just anyone as her Head Editor, but if she knew he had applied for Lightwood Fashions once before, there was a good chance she knew other things about his past, like how…

“Your work for Fade Media was admirable,” Maryse said, sounding genuinely impressed. “Lorenzo Rey isn’t an easy man to work for, and I have it under good authority that you should have been promoted years ago. Your track record is impeccable, and you truly are a valuable asset to our team. My children may like you a lot, Magnus, but that alone wouldn’t have been enough to get you a job here.”

“Of course,” Magnus nodded. “I shouldn’t have implied-”

“It’s fine,” Maryse cut him off. “I’m sure Isabelle made it out to be a lot more dramatic than it actually was. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have work to get back to. And you probably do too.”

“Yeah- Yes, I- Oh, shit. Yes, I do. I was supposed to be somewhere ten minutes ago, and I really need to get going,” Magnus clambered out of his seat, taking the time to shake Maryse’s hand before bolting out of the room.

Even as he rushed towards the fashion team’s floor, Magnus couldn’t help but go over everything that had just happened. He had Alexander’s mother’s blessing for their relationship, had been invited to a family dinner, and had officially gotten his dream job. It sounded too good to be true.

Everything was coming together perfectly, and yet he felt like the other shoe was ready to drop at any given moment.

***

“I ran into your mother today.”

Alec’s head snapped towards him as Magnus spoke, absent-mindedly twirling his pasta around in his plate and decidedly not meeting his boyfriend’s gaze. He had been trying to bring the topic up ever since they had gotten to the restaurant, but a part of him had been reluctant to break the peaceful and romantic atmosphere that had settled over them when Alexander had kissed him hello.

“You did?” Alec asked, his eyebrows furrowing adorably. “What did she want? Please tell me she didn’t hound you with questions about our relationship or some other nonsense like that. I swear she means well, but she tends to overstep. I’m still half convinced that she lives to embarrass us.”

“I’m pretty sure that’s what most parents do, darling,” Magnus chuckled. “But your mother was perfectly polite. She wanted to talk to me about work, and then she may or may not have mentioned you and our relationship and maybe even a certain family dinner?”

“I was going to invite you there myself,” Alec grumbled, his cheeks flushing a light pink.

“You want me to come?” Magnus whisper-shouted, burying his head in his hands. “Alexander, I was counting on you to tell me you didn’t want me there so I had an excuse not to go!”

“You don’t want to go?” Alec frowned, looking at Magnus as though he had just crushed his heart. “I thought you liked Isabelle, and I’m almost certain you’ll get along with Max, and Jace isn’t half as bad once you get to know him. Besides, Clary and Simon could always use some support on the non-Lightwood side of the table.”

“There are sides to the table?” Magnus blanched. “That is exactly why I don’t want to go to dinner. Look, Alec, I care about you. I care about you a lot, in fact, but I am terrible with families. Parents usually think I’m too much or not enough for their children, siblings always feel a little intimidated or like they have to threaten me, and I don’t see why we can’t just stick to our one-on-one dates.”

Alec raised his eyebrows at Magnus, looking completely unimpressed, and the journalist immediately deflated.

“I just don’t want to mess things up between us,” he sighed. “We’ve got a great thing going on, and I feel like meeting your family is just going to make everything complicated. What if they don’t like me?”

“Well, I’m pretty sure Izzy definitely likes you,” Alec answered, smirking at Magnus when the older man rolled his eyes. “And my mother wouldn’t have invited you if she didn’t think you were worthy of me or whatever else it is that helps her decide whether someone is allowed to attend family gatherings or not. As for everyone else… Who cares what they have to say? You have my mother’s, sister’s, and best friend’s approval. What more do you need?”

“Your approval?” Magnus suggested, grinning when Alec huffed exasperatedly. “I mean, you are the one I’m trying to impress, after all.”

“Magnus, of course you have my approval, you idiot,” Alec shook his head fondly. “I’m the one who’s dating you, remember? I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t be doing that if I didn’t like you at least a little bit. And if it makes you feel any better, I care about you a lot too.”

“It does make me feel better, actually,” Magnus preened.

He and Alec hadn’t exactly been shy when it came to their feelings, but they hadn’t talked about them in depth either. They had been dating for a month, but Magnus could count the number of times they had had a deep conversation on one hand. He didn’t mind that they were taking it slowly; he just wished he felt a little more secure in his relationship.

“But do you… Do you really want me there?” He asked quietly, feeling shier than he had in a very long time. “Or do you just feel obligated to ask me now that you know your mother talked to me about it?”

“Magnus,” Alec sighed, putting his hand down on the table, palm up, just waiting for Magnus to cover it with his own before speaking again. “Of course I want you to be there. Look, I know I haven’t talked to you about my family much. I also know we spend most of our time at the office, at your apartment, or out on dates, but you really do mean a lot to me. You’ve introduced me to your family, so it’s only fair of me to do the same in return.”

“You haven’t met all of my family,” Magnus pointed out, regretting his words as soon as a mischievous glint entered Alec’s eyes. “No. Whatever idea you just came up with, I’m going to have to pass. Nothing good ever comes from looks like that, Alexander. And I would know, since I see it in the mirror far too often for comfort.”

“At least hear me out before you turn it down,” Alec pouted. Magnus relented immediately – what could he say, he was weak for his boyfriend’s lips. “You’re nervous about meeting my family, right? So how about we make things easier by inviting your family too? I could ask Simon and Clary to bring their siblings and parents too, and we could make a whole thing out of it. My mom would be more than happy to have a few extra people over.”

Magnus opened his mouth to tell Alec it was a terrible idea, but he snapped it shut after a second’s deliberation.

On one hand, he wasn’t sure it was the best idea to bring a huge group of very different people together, especially when at least half the people involved were dating each other. On the other hand… Having more people around would mean less interactions between Magnus and the Lightwoods, which was exactly what he wanted.

Besides, he had always been planning on asking Catarina and Ragnor to spend an evening with Alexander and him at some point in the near future. By inviting everyone to the same event, they would be killing two birds with one stone, and giving Magnus a few more people to talk to without having to engage with Maryse and Jace Lightwood.

“It’s… Not a terrible idea,” he conceded, ignoring Alec’s little victorious cry – which wasn’t cute at all, it wasn’t. “Is your mother’s house big enough to have everyone over? Because my family means Catarina, Raphael, Ragnor, and Madzie. And if Clary is bringing her parents, that’s an extra two people, plus Simon’s, and whatever siblings they have…”

“It’ll be fine,” Alec assured him, squeezing his fingers gently before letting them go and focusing on his food again. “Anything to make you feel a little more comfortable.”

“That’s very sweet of you, darling,” Magnus smiled, going back to his pasta and wondering – not for the first time – what he had done to deserve someone like Alexander Lightwood in his life. “You know, my conversation with your mother made me think about something else that’s been on my mind for a little while. You never brought up the topic, so I wasn’t sure if it was something you were okay with talking about or not, but… Have you ever been in a serious relationship before this?”

Alec’s gaze shifted uncomfortably at the question, but Magnus noticed he also didn’t completely close off, so Magnus didn’t think he had screwed up too badly. It had been a while since had been in a relationship himself, but he was almost certain talking about past experiences was usually okay. Usually.

“Two or three,” Alec answered vaguely. “None of them worked out, and the last one wasn’t great, so I hadn’t seriously dated anyone in around two years when I met you. Is that… Is that a problem? Is it obvious?”

“It’s not a problem,” Magnus reassured him immediately. “Not at all. And it’s not completely obvious either, it’s just… Most people would have tried to hurry things along a lot faster than you did, so I assumed you just didn’t have a lot of experience. Not that I’m any better, since I was just as slow as you were.”

“So has it been a while for you too?” Alec inquired, seemingly caught somewhere between relief and confusion. “I mean, I thought- You’re just very- I can’t imagine why someone like you wouldn’t have someone in their life. Not because I think you sleep around or need someone to survive, you’re just--. You’re beautiful and kind and the closest thing to perfect I’ve ever met, so I thought you had to have had a lot more experience than me.”

“Not when it comes to relationships,” Magnus shrugged. “I’ve dated before, but I mostly stuck to one-night-stands after my long-time girlfriend broke my heart and thoroughly screwed me over. So don’t worry about your lack of experience, because I guarantee you that I’m just as nervous about messing this up as you are.”

“Oh,” Alec said softly. “That’s- I mean, it’s not good that you had a bad experience, but I’m glad that I’m not the only stressed one in this relationship. Clary kept telling me that all I had to do was talk to you, but I just wasn’t sure, especially since her relationship with Izzy is hardly the most stable one in the world. No offence to them, of course.”

“Oh no, I completely agree,” Magnus chuckled. “The double date was nice, but we’re definitely not doing that again for a while, no matter how much you and Clary want to plan something. I care about both of them, and I know you do too, but they’re very different together than they are apart.”

“They bring out the worst and the best in each other,” Alec smiled crookedly. “It’s both a blessing and a curse. Sometimes, I wonder if Clary was right and they truly are too different for each other. But, then I see how in love they are, even after years of petty arguments and low-level hatred, and I remember why they’re so perfect for each other.”

“I think everyone got that from the fact that Clary designs her clothes with Isabelle in mind,” Magnus laughed softly.

A strange look, one that was slowly but surely becoming familiar to Magnus, crossed Alec’s face as he spoke. Every once in a while, Magnus would say something about Clary or the fashion team or the secret designer or the collection, and that same look would appear on Alec’s face, almost like clockwork. The journalist wasn’t sure what it was about yet, wasn’t even sure whether it was a good thing or a bad thing, but he couldn’t help but feel like he was simply missing a piece of the bigger puzzle.

“She’s her muse,” his boyfriend eventually said, voice sounding hoarse and loaded with emotion. “It’s not uncommon for artists to have someone they think about when they’re trying to create art. Most of the time, Clary has enough imagination to last her a lifetime, but when she’s feeling down or uninspired, Izzy is the thing that keeps her going.”

“It’s romantic as hell,” Magnus hummed. “Clary may not think she’s doing much by dedicating collection upon collection to Isabelle, but that’s one sure way to make sure you stay with your soulmate forever. I know for a fact that I wouldn’t be able to stay away from someone who designed an entire line of clothes for me.”

“You wouldn’t?” Alec asked, once again shooting Magnus that slightly uncertain, worried, and fond look. “So if someone were to design a collection for you, you would leave me and run into their arms?”

Alexander was smiling as he spoke, so Magnus knew he wasn’t being serious, but he also thought he should make one thing very clear, no matter what he had been joking about earlier.

“No, of course not,” he told Alec sincerely. “I just meant… Look, if someone designed clothes for me right now, it would be a little creepy and slightly obsessive. But if you were to design clothes for me – I know, I know, not going to happen anytime soon – how could I possibly leave you? It’s kind of like… If I wrote a book and dedicated it to you. How would that make you feel?”

“Very much in love,” Alec answered bluntly, flushing at his choice of words but resolutely not taking them back. “It would be physical proof that I have someone out there who loves me enough to give me a piece of their art or their life.”

“Exactly,” Magnus nodded. “Which is why I think there’s a good chance Isabelle and Clary are going to end up married, someday. I just hope I’ll still be around to see the wedding, and maybe even help with the colour schemes if Clary’s secret partner is too busy doing something else.”

“I’m sure he won’t be too busy,” Alec snorted, and then clapped his hand over his mouth, his eyes widening comically. Magnus frowned, going over his words, wondering what about his statement had been so-

“It’s a man!” He cried out, quieting down when the couple sitting at the table next to theirs shot them a reprimanding glance. “It’s a man! I knew you would slip up someday! And I promise I’m not going to say anything to anyone, alright, but I knew it! I knew it had to be a man.”

“Why? Because a woman couldn’t come up with those outfits?” Alec raised his eyebrows judgmentally, although Magnus could tell he was mostly just amused and slightly exasperated by Magnus’ antics. “Don’t let Clary hear you say that, or she’ll insist on designing the next collection by herself, and then her partner will be out of a job. You wouldn’t want to be the one to cost her partner his job, right?”

“As if she could ever let him go,” Magnus scoffed. “The man’s a genius, and I will never change my mind about that. Clary may be a wonderful artist, and her designs may be beautiful, but nothing could beat that man’s talent with colours. You could learn a few things from him, you know? Maybe you should have a talk with him before the fashion show, just so you don’t end up wearing an outfit that doesn’t actually match.”

“Sure,” Alec choked out, looking like he was trying very hard not to laugh at Magnus. “Sure, yeah, I’ll have a chat with him sometime in the near future. I’m sure he’ll have some wonderful advice for me. But should I be worried for us? I know you said you wouldn’t leave me for just any designer, but what if your colour genius designed something for you? Are you telling me you would be able to resist him?”

He hesitated for a second. A second. And yet, Alec still managed to catch his slight moment of doubt.

“Ha! I knew it!” He grinned widely. “I knew you had a professional crush on him. Tell you what, as soon as he reveals himself, I’ll make sure you get a one-on-one session with him. Maybe an interview? I’m sure everyone will have plenty of questions when he finally decides to tell the world about his true identity.”

“I- You- I mean, I’m not going to say no to that,” Magnus pouted. “But let it be known that I don’t intend on cheating on you, even if the man designs me an entire collection. No one is as impressive as you are, Alexander, not even the genius who created my peacock outfit, and that white ensemble I’ve only seen in pictures so far, and that dress Isabelle was wearing the other day.”

“I can’t believe it,” Alec laughed brightly. “Clary is going to have a field trip when I tell her about this.”

“Oh god, you’re never going to let this go, are you?” Magnus groaned. “I should have kept my mouth shut. Although, in my defence, it’s like the man is tempting me! The spring collection is basically made for me, in the less sentimental sense than what Clary does for Isabelle. Has… Has the secret partner met me?”

“I’m not giving you any more clues, Magnus,” Alec rolled his eyes. “But he knows what you look like, and he would be an idiot not to take advantage of such a beautiful model. I can’t even blame him for wooing you through clothes, because I would do the exact same thing in his place. You’re a vision, Magnus, and I would be proud to call you my muse.”

Sometimes, Magnus forgot that Alec could be smooth when he got out of his mind. He forgot that behind the blushes and the stammering and the constant worry, there was a confident man who knew what he wanted and wasn’t afraid of taking it. Magnus knew he was getting closer and closer to completely tearing down Alexander’s defences, and it never ceased to send a thrill of pleasure down his spine.

“I would love nothing more than to be your muse,” he murmured, looking up at Alec from underneath his lashes and smirking smugly when his boyfriend’s eyes darkened with desire. “But you know, I’m sure I could inspire you to do a great many things other than art.”

“Oh, I’m sure you could,” Alec breathed out. “Do you want to get out of here? My apartment is only ten minutes away.”

Magnus was out of his seat and slamming a handful of bills on the table before Alec could even finish speaking. His boyfriend stared at him wide-eyed for a few moments, but he was standing and dragging Magnus out of the restaurant less than five seconds later, giggling and smiling and looking like he had just been handed the stars and the moon.

Alexander Lightwood was beautiful, and he was his, and if Magnus had been even just a little bit more of a romantic, he might have believed he was already in love with him.

#malec #magnus bane #alec lightwood #fanfic #my writing

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welcome-to-the-whumpfest · 5 years ago

Text

Prologue

In the moment his eyes shot open, Ryder knew something was amiss. Instead of curling on himself, as he usually did, the young fourteen-year-old shivered forward. There was fresh air wafting through the closet, meaning the front door had to of been open. Odd, seeing as Sir and Mistress rarely leave this late at night, unless their plan was to obtain another Advanced. A chill rattled the young one’s spine as he bit his lip in trepidation. They’re bored of me! A wave of insurmountable fear gushed through his veins as he shivered despite the musty heat suffocating the tiny closet. Ryder’s greatest fear was abandonment. Despite everything he had suffered, he couldn’t fathom the extreme terror that would overtake his body if he was dumped off in a random, isolated location. He would rather die; Sir and Mistress knew this.

Pressing his ear against the closet door, Ryder listened carefully to the rushed footsteps. There was an extra click behind them, meaning it was the Mistress (she wore painful looking high heels.) Before Ryder could continue puzzling, he heard Mistress’s voice. “He’s a handsome one, isn’t he!” She was delighted by whoever Sir brought back. Ryder’s stomach twisted in jealousy.

A haunting chuckle escaped Sir’s lips, “Wait till you see the other one.” His voice was smug per usual.

Ryder heard the heavy creaking of the basement door opening. It sounded as though Sir was carrying a body down there. It was definitely, an unfortunate Advance that was either tricked or simply wasn’t strong or fast enough to escape. It was always this way. What would make this one any different? Sir and Mistress will keep them for a while than either release them or kill them. Almost every time, it was the latter.

Ryder knew he shouldn’t stay up much later, seeing as if he was caught listening, he’d certainly earn a punishment. Even though his curiosity was bubbling inside his chest, he crawled back towards his single, torn up blanket and closed his eyes.

******

The rickety shake of the closet door opening caused Ryder to jolt awake. Snapping his dazed eyes up at Mistress, he forced himself to blink the sleep out of his eyes. “Get up.” She spoke calmly. There was nothing cold or venomous in her words, in fact, if he wasn’t mistaken, she seemed excited. Frantically raising to his feet and finding himself a bit dizzy at the sudden movement, the young boy had to place a hand on the wall to steady himself. Not waiting for him, Mistress left the closet doorway and disappeared into the hallway. “Come with me.” Her alto tone blossomed into the air. Without question or hesitation, Ryder trailed behind her and inhaled sharply at seeing where they were headed.

The basement.

The door was already opened. He could hear Sir’s voice down there. Before following Mistress, Ryder glanced at the window. It was still dark. He hadn’t been asleep very long since Sir came home. Carefully making his way down the creaking stairs, Ryder prayed that his eyes would adjust to the darkness. Before his eyes could tell what was happening, he heard it: the panicked breathing.

“Good. Everyone is here.” Sir sounded quite pleased with himself as he turned to face Mistress and the young boy. “I believe introductions are in order.” He smiled that heartless smile Ryder had seen so many times. Finally adjusting to the darkness, Ryder tensed upon seeing not one, but two forms, both hanging from the ceiling by their wrists. The chains swayed, menacingly looming over their heads. “You will refer to me as ‘Sir’. If you fail to address me this way at any given time, you will receive a punishment.”

“You must call me, Mistress. Failure to due so will also result in punishment.” Her gorgeous black hair drifted in waves down her shoulders. “Are we clear?” She always loved asking questions. She was concisely to the point and once she had finished her simple statement, she would force her prisoner to speak. It was her response game. Normally, there was no answer that would save you. Remaining silent would enrage her. If you temporarily gave the correct answer, she would continue interviewing until she found a fault. This was her game, and she never lost. It seemed natural that her first interaction would contain a teaser for what was to come.

Neither one of the two responded, both frozen in a silent perturbation. When Ryder looked closer, he could see the twitching of their mouths. He recognized the silence spell anywhere. Both were magically forced to remain quiet. They were not permitted to speak at this time, meaning the Mistress wanted them to nod. Neither did so.

“Now, I will ask you one at a time for your names.” Sir approached one of the hanging forms. This one was larger than the other; his toes barely brushed up against the floor whereas the other was completely hanging.

With a flick of his wrist, Sir released the silence spell for him. He gasped, desperately fighting to regain his breath. “Ge-t a-away fr-from me-e!” He staggered with a low, gravelly voice. His chocolate skin dripped with sweat.

“Just so you know, for future references, that is not a good answer and your behavior will not be permitted. Right now, I’m allowing it because you didn’t know. So, I’ll give you another chance. What is your name?” Sir folded his hands in front of his chest politely.

Sensing the sinister ideas formulating inside Sir’s mind and seeing no immediate danger in giving his name away, the young man answered out of fear, “Jordan.”

“That wasn’t so hard was it?” Despite his words, Sir looked disgusted. Ryder knew Sir loved the feisty ones. The ones that wouldn’t comply. The ones determined not to break. If Mistress didn’t take a liking to this one, more than likely he would be killed swiftly. Sir wouldn’t give him the time of day and Mistress would grow bored.

In other words, Jordan, was not in a safe position.

Reusing the silence spell, Sir made his way towards the other form, who’s feet were dangling helplessly. Whereas Jordan was bulging with muscles, this one was of a smaller stature. He had raven black hair and pale, fair skin. The moment the silence spell was removed from him, Sir leaned his face towards the young man. Ryder could see clearly through the near blackness of the stonewalled basement, that this one was beautiful. He held his breath in anticipation.

“Aren’t you a stunning lit-” Before Sir could finish, the black haired prisoner swung his legs back, pushed off the wall, and kicked Sir hard enough in the chest that he lost his balance and fell to the ground. Ryder gasped, his eyes widening as he noticed the other didn’t look sorry in the least (nor did he seem afraid of the consequences that were sure to ensue.)

Pushing himself off the floor, a wild gleam appeared in Sir’s eyes as he laughed maniacally. Jordan was trembling, but the other remained fearless, his eyebrows angled in a daring frown. Glancing at Mistress, Ryder noticed that she was beginning to fidget, barely able to contain herself from getting involved. Instantaneously, Jordan was forgotten, and both Sir and Mistress looked hungry for the other young man. “As much as I would love a play session right now, I was hoping we’d get your name, first. I don’t give second chances, but I’ll grant you mercy this once.” Sir stalked towards the young man, as if a predator were hunting its prey. “Now, tell us your name.”

“I don’t share personal information with psychopaths.”

Sir’s eyes widened at the guts the young man had. A twisted, gleeful smile crept across Sir’s lips. “Oh darling,” He growled, sounding like a mad animal, “by the time we’re done, I’ll know every single, dirty detail about you.”

“Can’t wait.” He snarled back, matching the intensity of his captor.

#whumpfest #welcometothewhump #things are just getting started #angst #fear #chains

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