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be-ready-when-i-say-go · 4 years ago

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A Family of Five- Part 5: Connected

Calum and Harlowe’s marriage hasn’t always been easy, but it has always been filled with love. This is a collaborative experience with In Sorrow and In Joy. Dad!Calum. Black OC.

CW: Over the course of this series, there are mentions of pregnancy, therapy, and postpartum depression. There is also 18+ Content (Smut)

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No one has my permission to repost my work of fiction. This includes translations as well.

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Harlowe looks to her left, over to the driver seat. Calum tugs on the blue baseball cap, readjusting it on his head. The traffic isn’t light, though it’s not as bad as they imagined. Harlowe can see the tension in his jaw. She sighs, reaching out for his knee. The kids are so excited to be going down to Disneyland, as they always are. The flight was good for most of them. Nikau was content to sit in either her or Calum’s lap. Esha and Te Koha slept for a lot of it, and the portion that they were awake for they were overflowing with energy. Harlowe could tell something was going with Calum halfway through the flight. He said it was only a small headache, but it was a lot more. She even said that she’d drive; she had rested longer than him on the plane ride. Calum told her he could handle it.

At the contact of her hand, he looks over, still pressing the brakes as they are caught in small stand still. Esha and Koha are huddled over one of their portable gaming stations. Te Koha is trying to help her beat a stage boss. Nikau is fast asleep in his carseat.

“Take the next food exit, we’ll grab the kids some breakfast and I’ll take over,” she offers to her husband.

Calum closes his eyes for a second before nodding. “Yeah, okay.”

“Also you’re taking an Advil too. I’m not sure why you refused it on the plane. But you’re going to get around it now.”

Though there’s tension all along his neck, shoulders, and the base of his skull, he chuckles. The brake lights disappear from the cars in front of them. They travel for a couple more miles before Calum sees an exit with gas stations, and some fast food place.

“This isn’t Disneyland,” Esha states as the car stops in front Hardee’s.

“Making a small pit stop, baby girl. Hungry?”

“Starving,” Te Koha replies to his mother, laughing. They all unbuckle. Harlowe hands her purse to Calum, with a stern gaze. He finds the small plastic bag in her zipper pocket while she unfastens Nikau, helping him out. Esha steps out of the truck followed by the eldest. The five of them huddle into the restaurant. Harlowe wrangles the kids, figuring what each child wants and then orders two of her order for Calum.

Calum steps into the bathroom for a second, closing his eyes to try and relieve some pressure from his skull. He didn’t sleep much the night before the flight, nor did he sleep much on it, too tense and too worried that his plan could fall through at any second. He was elated that the kids mostly slept through the flight. Te Koha can keep a secret; Esha cannot. She’s vital to this plan, but if she says the wrong thing too soon, things won’t work out-- not like he had hoped though.

He stretches his shoulders, praying at something, anything will do the trick and give him some relief and it does. However, the second he lifts his hand, the pounding in the base of his skill resumes. He groans, but exits the bathroom and sees Harlowe balancing one tray with Nikau on her hip. Te Koha is holding the second one. “I think this one is mine,” Calum teases, sliding the tray from Harlowe’s hand.

“Why thank you, my good sir. Now if only I could get this baby off my hip who’s very upset to be awake right now, I think we’d be golden,” Harlowe coos, rubbing Nik’s back.

“I am not a wizard,” Calum returns, kissing her forehead as they settle into a booth.

“Just my luck, a princess that falls in love with the frog.”

“Daddy’s more a prince charming, Momma,” Esha states with an eye roll. She unwraps her sandwich after rubbing the hand sanitizer thoroughly.

“Maybe more like Kristoff,” Koha ponders.

“So no one’s going to say Maui; I’m hurt.” Calum fakes like he’s leaving the booth. Esha grabs his arm, pulling with all her strength. Calum leans back into her gently, spreading his arms out, dramatically huffing.

She giggles, pushing at him. “Alright Dad, no need to be that dramatic.”

Sitting up, Calum kisses the top of her head, patting Koha on his shoulder. Though it hurts to laugh, he bears through it. It’s worth it, seeing his kids smile and laugh. Especially Te Koha, even if it’s just a small chuckle--Calum will take that over the gloom that had settled behind his boys eyes. Since starting Year Ten, he’s withdrawn a little. Calum prays this trip gives him the much needed rest and a chance to feel like he can open up. Harlowe’s tried talking to him, but Koha usually shrugs, says it nothing. His parents know it’s not nothing. It can’t be nothing with the way he drags out of bed. Not with the way he doesn’t like talking about school, barely wants to stay back for lacrosse practice. Te Koha’ has always been a fairly quiet child, but not this quiet.

Calum looks over to Harlowe. They are sharing the same thought, the same concern. What is happening with their son? Calum doesn’t want to bring this conversation up right now, not in front of Esha. The two of them are so loving towards each other, but Calum wants to pull his son aside, talk to him in private, just in case it’s too personal. Harlowe doesn’t want to make it seem like she’s forcing or pushing him to talk-- so she keeps quiet-- but prays Koha knows that she’s always there for him. It takes all her strength not to reach across the table and pull Te Koha into her lap, it takes every ounce of willpower not to rock him like she used to do when he was a baby. If only a hug could fix it, she would’ve healed his ache long ago.

“Babe?” Calum questions, sliding his hand over hers.

Harlowe glances up from her sandwich, blinking back tears. She hadn’t even realized that she was tearing up, body somehow so lost in her thoughts that the sting never registered, that they blur to her vision hadn’t clicked as her warning. “I’m okay,” she says softly, wiping her nose.

“Momma?” Nikau questions, holding a round hashbrown out to her.

Harlowe shakes her head, smiling, “No, eat Nikau. Momma’s okay.”

He continues to hold it out, “Eat.”

“I have my own food, baby.” When Nikau doesn’t retreat with the hashbrown, she bends down, taking hold of it and pressing kisses into his chubby cheeks. “Thank you, bub.”

Nikau watches her, to make sure she doesn’t sneak it back in front of him. “Welcome,” he smiles--a spitting image of Calum’s.

“Have you taken your meds?” Calum asks, wrapping his fingers tight around her palm. She nods, her eyes don’t fall to his cheeks. She’s telling the truth. Calum studies her face and watches as her eyes fall to his side of the booth, towards Te Koha. He understands now and nods, rubbing his thumb over her hand.

Finished with their breakfast, everyone piles back into the rental car, Harlowe in the driverseat. She double checks everyone is buckled, then single Calum’s out. “If I don’t hear snores from you on the rest of this drive, we fighting. I’m pulling over and it’s going to be over for you.”

Calum puts his hands up. “It’s lights out o’clock,” he grins. The tension has faded somewhat, thanks to the water and some food. He can still feel a dull ache. The meds are slowly kicking in for him. Sleep might help; he knows at the very least to try to and sleep after Harlowe’s warning. Even though there’s only about half an hour left in the drive, it’s better than nothing. Reclining his head against the headrest, Calum pulls the hat down even more, to block out the rising sun from his eyes.

Harlowe gets back onto the highway, noticing some morning traffic up ahead of her. It’s thinning out though, which she appreciates it. Rolling down the pavement, Harlowe nods a long to the song playing from the radio. The back of the truck is too quiet. “Y’all mighty quiet back there,” she teases, glancing back for a second. Not even Nikau is talking.

“Boss, Ma,” Te Koha responds.

Harlowe nods with a hum. “Kick their butt,” she laughs. “Go for the kneecaps.”

Esha chuckles. “I wish. But thanks Momma.”

“Anytime, baby girl.”

Esha release a groan, the sounds of furious tapping bleeding in as the song changes on the radio. Te Koha starts talking to Nikau, playing with him before Esha speaks up, “Ugh, can you do it Koha? My fingers are dumb.”

“You almost got it though.”

“Please?”

“One more try and if you die then, I’ll do it for you,” he concedes. Esha’s whine is cut off by Calum’s snore. Harlowe smiles, pleased at the sound. Esha’s tapping cuts in and out of of the songs and snores. After a few more minutes, cheering starts up.

Harlowe’s not sure what happening, but she lets out a small, “Whoop whoop” before asking, “Now what are we celebrating? Did you beat the boss, Esha?” Nikau claps, giggling with excitement at the sudden uproar in the car.

“Yeah, I did,” she cheers a little too loudly and slaps her hands over her mouth. Calum snaps awake. Esha sees his wide-eyed stare. Koha laughs from next to her. “Sorry, Dad,” she whispers. “I just beat the boss. Go back to sleep.”

He nods, before settling back down in the passenger seat. Harlowe, having pressed her lips together, releases her laugh in a short snorts. When she glances back from the rearview mirror to the backseat, Esha’s embarrassment is still clear on her face. It’s a good thing Calum can fall asleep anywhere and in three seconds flat. Though now after kids, he does wake easily. Harlowe can’t blink in bed without waking Calum some nights.

The car is silent for another minute or so. “Why do we always go to Disneyland?” Esha whispers.

“We don’t always go to Disneyland,” Harlowe replies. They do go very often, she’ll admit. But it feels extremely important to go this year after Nikau. They didn’t go the first two years after his birth just because of the flight was so long. His done well on other ones, though they were much shorter. Harlowe and Calum have a special connection to the theme park. It might seem childish, but she loves these trips.

“We come here a lot,” Te Koha interjects.

“Papa Bear and I had our honeymoon here,” Harlowe answers, switching lanes before continuing her thought. “I got pregnant with Te Koha before we even got engaged. It wasn’t almost until I was about to deliver that he asked me to marry him. He said, he had been planning to ask months before we even found out. He was just afraid that the kid would make me run off. He didn’t want to ask and then make a fool out of himself. Mind you, I was the one that asked if I could move in with him. That way, he could be as close with his baby as he could be before touring and being a rockstar made him leave. He was so happy to be a father, talked about it every chance he could. Though he wanted to move back to Sydney, he couldn’t do so right away.

“No this wasn’t my ideal situation, but I was more than happy to start a family. Calum proposed while in the middle of moving me out of my apartment. He was sweaty from lifting and going up and down the stairs. But he had disappeared with some boxes to put into the moving truck for far too long. So when he came back, I could see something in his pocket. I didn’t think anything of it.”

“It was the ring?” Esha questions.

She nods. “Yeah, I turned around, to point out what stuff was going into the garbage, and what stuff was the last of my things to move. When I turned back around, he was on one knee, holding the box open.”

“Do you remember what he said?” Te Koha asks, looking over to his dad, baseball cap partially covering his face again. He’s always seen his dad as a quiet person, never too emotional, but funny and caring.

“I remember,” Harlowe answers softly. Te Koha has always wondered what Calum was thinking feeling when asking that question. He knows what his dad’s surprise is for his mom, knows how worried he was about everything going off perfectly. To see Calum that worried about something for his mom made Te Koha see how much love is there. Even though they tease each other and the entire family is made up on a lot of sass, there’s so much love.

“What did he say?”

“Well, one he was a firehose of tears, but he said, ‘I’ve thought about how to ask you this question for months. I’ve kicked myself for not asking sooner. But I love you, I love you and that child you’re growing. I know I said I will always be there, always do whatever you needed me to do. I want to be selfish, I want to do this for me. I want to ask you to be my wife, because I want that honor and no one else. I want my family to be complete, and there’s no one better to complete it with and no better way to complete it than asking, Will marry me, giving me the honor to call you my wife?’” This time the tears are clear to Harlowe as they start. She makes the right turn, onto their exit. She inhales deeply at the memory as it washes over her.

“Dad’s such a softie,” Esha giggles. “That’s so cute.”

“I’m in the wedding photos though,” Koha probes, needing more details. “I don’t remember it really, but I’ve seen the photos.”

“We didn’t get married until you were about three. I wasn’t in a rush to get married. We had our hands full with you. I couldn’t even think about planning a wedding. The band was releasing a new album about a year after you were born, so I went on the road with them for a few months with you. I thought about just going to a courthouse in one of the cities. But the schedule didn’t really work and Papa Bear was very much against it.”

“I surely was,” Calum states through a sigh. He stretches, a yawn interrupting his next sentence before it can leave his lips. “We had a kid before we even being engaged. I was going to give her the wedding she deserved.”

“But we both agreed on taking a family trip to Disneyland. That was our honeymoon. Even if we did honeymoon with all of Papa Bear’s family, it was a great time. Everything I could imagine,” Harlowe bites her lip, remembering the two days that Joy took Te Koha leaving them to some much needed alone time.

Calum knows what she’s thinking about and rests his hand on her thigh. High enough to give a hint, but not too high that the kids will say anything. “The wedding was worth the wait right though?” he asks, squeezing Harlowe’s thigh.

“It was. You did a Haka with your family and Te Koha and I damn near cried.”

“You did cry,” Calum corrects.

“Ssh, no I didn’t. I got an eyelash in my eye.

“Both of them? At the same time?”

Harlowe pouts, knowing she did very well cry watching Calum and his family members. She swore for a second there, she saw spirits floating above them too while they danced. Calum hasn’t done one since, so she can’t say for sure what she saw or if it was the tears. But watching him made her insides light with a fire. Mali and Joy stood with her, watching as well. Mali was animated, return gestures and faces. Joy held Harlowe’s arm, tears streaming silently down her face. Harlowe was stunned, teary eyed but filled with an eagerness to join in.

By the end, Joy released her, sensing how badly Harlowe wanted to acknowledge the traditional cry. Mali taught her--it was rushed and not perfect but the two of them chanted and cried back at the group of men. It was seeing the light in Te Koha’s eyes as he danced with his father that got Harlowe, made her want to show her son it’s okay to be proud. That it’s okay to look a little different and still love your roots. Though sometimes Harlowe shouted back in her Native tongue, it was in that atmosphere, amongst spirits of ancestors that the language barrier did not exist. It was the act of souls touching souls--the same tongue was not needed.

Harlowe pulls into the resort parking lot, wiping her face with her shirt. “I’m turning into the firehose of tears now, shoot.”

After checking in, Harlowe agrees to take the kids down to the pool. Te Koha and Esha head to their rooms to change. Nikau grabs onto Calum. “Do you want to swim, Nikau?” He shakes his head, tugging again at Calum.

“Aww, buddy, Daddy’s here,” Calum chuckles, picking him up.

“How’s your head?” she asks Calum.

“Better, sleep helped. I’ll take Nik for some exploring--just walk around. We’ll meet you at the pool, okay?”

Harlowe nods, kissing her boy’s cheeks, gently nibbling with her lips. He laughs, “Stop, Momma.”

Harlowe ceases, stroking his hair. “Momma loves you.”

“Wove you too.”

Harlowe changes, taking the two kids down the pool. Calum waits until the door clicks shut before pulling his phone out. There are several texts and phone calls. Calum stands Nikau on the counter top, grinning as the boys dances a little to the ringing tone.

“Think Momma’s going to like her surprise?” Cal asks his baby boy.

Nikau nods. “Yes.”

It takes about twenty minutes to touch base with everyone. Calum packs a little bag with water and some snacks and a change of clothes before setting out on their adventure. Nikau happily trots alongside his dad, pausing only whenever a bug flies by and watching it intensely. Calum only gets stopped once by some fans who ask for pictures. Nikau smiles, and waves at them from his father’s arms. Once they are free from fans, the walks continues and Calum snaps a few pictures of Nikau intently exploring the earth around him. Once the last text comes in that they’ve arrived safely to the resort, Calum heads to the pool. He’ll take them off the resort for dinner, so Harlowe won’t run into anyone before tomorrow.

At the pool, Calum spots her easily, reclining on the sun lounger, brown skin glistening, proudly wearing a two piece even with the stretch marks from three kids. Calum stands over her, blocking the sun from her way. Nikau attempts to climb up into the seat. So Calum places him next to her. “I was kind of soaking that up,” she retorts, sitting up and settling Nik between her legs.

“You should be watching the kids,” he laughs.

She pushes up her glasses, nodding in their direction. “I’m watching them just fine.”

“Momma, look,” Nikau holds up tiny purple blossom.

“Oh, it’s so pretty, baby boy. Did you find it on your walk?”

He nods. “Yes. Daddy pick it for me.”

“By the time I noticed what he was doing, I just plucked it,” Calum laughs with a shrug.

Carefully, Harlowe picks up the blossom and notices there’s a small bit of the stem left. “Do you want it in your hair? Or do you just want to hold it?” she asks.

“Hair,” Nikau replies, pointing to his head. Harlowe nods, reaching into her bag. A clip in her hand and she carefully places it in his hair. It’s a very small blossom, so it won’t be too heavy for the clip.

Calum looks out to the pool, Esha and Te Koha having a small splash war before he tries to swim away. Esha chases after him. “I think Papa Bear should’ve gotten a flower too. You two could’ve been twins,” Harlowe teases. Calum turns back to her, heart hammering a little. God, even after all these years, Calum still finds himself so stunned by her beauty. He stretches over, kissing her softly. He can’t wait to see her face tomorrow.

“Where are we going again?” Harlowe asks sliding into the cork wedges. Calum insisted that she pack a white dress. She wasn’t sure why initially but didn’t question it too much. She thought it might be a for a themed dinner. But now the day of, she’s not sure that’s it. It was well after park hours. The kids aren’t wearing white, thankfully, because Nikau is notorious for falling and getting grass stains all over himself. He’s dressed in black dress pants and a cute green polo.

“It’s a show,” Calum explains, leaving the first few buttons of his shirt undone and letting the black tank underneath peek through the navy striped button up. He watches her in the mirror, debating which jewelry to wear. She slides on some gold bangles but leaves it at that.

“Momma! I need help!” Esha shouts.

“What’s up?” she calls back, scurrying out of their room towards Esha’s cry for help.

“Zipper,” is the answer. Calum dabs on some cologne, pulling a face in the mirror as Nikau watches from the bed. The baby laughs, falling backwards in his fit of giggles at his father’s wide eyes and pouty lipped expression.

Calum turns around, tickling the boy. “Silly boy,” he laughs, picking him up and setting him to the floor. Te Koha walks into the room, knocking softly on the open door. “What’s up?”

Koha holds out the velvet black box. “Figured I’d hand that over now while Mom’s busy.”

“Thank you, for helping me a lot. I really appreciate it, Koha.”

He shrugs. “No problem, Dad.” There’s something in the way he stands, Calum notices. He looks to the floor.

Calum pockets the box. “You know you can talk to me about anything, right, son?”

Koha nods, picking at his fingernails his gaze is still settled on the carpet. Cal knows better than to push this. He lets the silence linger. Te Koha finally looks up to his dad, noticing the careful slight downturn to his brows. It’s the concern, the want to ask, the need to help, but a fear to push too much. Koha exhales deeply. “Can we talk? Like after the ceremony and everything?”

“Of course we can.”

“Cool, thanks Dad. For being there.”

“I’ll always be there,” Calum states, gently pulling Koha into his side and hugging him. Koha’s just about staring him eye to eye. It’s terrifying how tall he’s getting. But it’s to be expected. Calum runs a hand over the current hairstyle, a boxtop. “You actually use that oil Mum recommended?”

Koha huffs with a smile, patting down the afro. “Yeah, I did, Dad. I gotta look good for the girls.” He pauses for a moment.

Calum notices. There’s something else on his lips that he dares not let fall. Calum laughs, slinging his arm around Koha’s shoulders. “Whatever gets you to take care of your hair and shower is fine be me.”

Esha and Harlowe emerge soon after, ready to go. Calum’s already got Harlowe’s purse and the backpack for Nikau with some coloring stuff and a spare change of clothes just in case an accident happens. Though it’s not likely. It’s as the limousine waits in front of the resort that Harlowe suspects for sure that it’s not a show like Calum is trying to pass off. They slide into the back of the car, door clicking close by the driver.

“What did you do?” Harlowe narrows her gaze at Calum.

He shrugs. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“What have you done?” she asks again. Calum shakes his head. She turns to Koha.

He holds his hands up. “I was only told to get dressed for dinner. I don’t know anything.” She sighs. Of course he’d be a hard one to crack. Too calm under pressure. Harlowe looks to Esha. She’ll give it up.

“Mom, I may or may not know what’s happening. But if I tell, it’s my life. I like living.”

Harlowe sighs, dropping her head for a second. “Calum you’ve done something and have roped our kids into it. I’ll never know how you managed to keep Esha quiet, but whatever it is, it’s good. Too good.”

Readjusting his hold on Nik, Calum bends down kissing her temple. “It’s just a show and dinner.”

“With a limousine? Baby, I wasn’t born at night, let alone last night.” The drive in a battle of Harlowe hurling questions to get a hint to the truth and Calum batting them down. He’s too damn good at this, at this calmness on top of a lot of panic. With a playful wag of her fist, Harlowe resigns to the drive with no clues. The car tops and from the windows, she can see pink and purple lights.

The sight catches her breathe in her throat. The door opens and the Sleeping Beauty Castle stares down at her light up in a beautiful purple. Esha and Koka climb out first. Koha takes Nikau as he climbs out and they wait for their parents to exit the car. Esha laughs as her mother’s sobs start up. “Calum, no, you didn’t,” Harlowe cries, climbing at of the car thanks to his help.

Esha slides her mother some tissue and they lead the way. Harlowe clings to Calum’s arm, whispering over and over, that it’s in his best interest to tell her what is happening. She is a mess though and know the threats are empty, hollow even before she can utter them. They walk through the park, attendants, smiling hard at them. They lead them to the front of the castle. Harlowe sees a crowd already waiting. Her family and his in the crowd.

They stand in the presence of Calum and Harlowe. Mali hands her a bouquet and note cards. “You’re a mess,” she teases, dabbing under her eyes.

“Mali, thank you. I can’t stop the tears. You know how I get.”

Fanning her face, Mali clears away some of the mascara that started to run down her face. “It’s alright. It’s why I’m here.” They hug quickly and Mali ducks back to her seat.

Harlowe glances down to the cards in her hand, they’re her original vows. She gasps turning to Calum who’s still holding onto her arm. “No you didn’t,” she laughs, lightly hitting his chest with the notecards. They talked about renewing vows, but the way Calum asked questions, she always thought it would later. She was okay with that, okay with waiting. But she knew she should’ve listened to her gut when he started asking what she wanted to her new band to look like, what she wanted to put on his new one. All those months ago--that was her warning to what was to come. She thought herself crazy, it seemed suspicious, but harmless enough.

Calum grins, grabbing onto her free hand. “You’re not a princess anymore. You’re a queen. But I figured you’d appreciate the Disneyland magic for our vow renewal.”

“I love you,” she whispers, kissing him sweetly before they walk down the aisle. Koha stands next to Esha, holding a black folder in his hands. Harlowe looks around to see the grandparents huddled together with Nikau. He waves at his parents as they pass. It’s a moment before Harlowe recognizes the song playing, Work Song, by Hozier as they proceed.

At the end of the aisle, Harlowe and Calum face each other. Esha holds the bouquet. Koha starts, reading a small speech about his parents love and watching the two of them uplift each other even when things seemed dark. “I wish them many more happy years together. Dad’s been a rock for Mom in her trying times. Mom’s the glue when Dad’s ducktape jobs don’t always work. But they always put us first, and each other above themselves. If that’s not love, I don’t know what else is,” Koha concludes.

Esha reads next. “I know I haven’t been alive very long. A point Momma likes to make a lot. But even in my eleven years I have watched my parents grow. I have watched them make mistakes, and learn from them. I have watched them roll with the punches. I have watched them to constantly make it through. I have watched them love each other and me, Te Koha and Nikau unconditionally. Mom, I know it’s still hard to let people help you. I know you want to be strong and do it all yourself. You don’t have to. We are here. Dad is here for you. We love you. Thank you for letting Dad help you. Thank you for choosing to love him every day, thanks for loving us. Dad, I know you’re going to have choice words for me bringing this up, but, I am my mother’s daughter.” Calum laughs, with a shake of his head. “Dad, thank you for letting Mom into your life. Thank you for loving her. Thank you for letting her crack you open. Without her, we wouldn’t be here. But don’t think all the work is done. She makes a choice and so do you. Make sure you’re choosing her. We know you choose family every second of every day, but Mom’s, well she was there first, don’t forget to choose her as your wife, not just our mother. You’re going so far. I want a love like yours. Thank you for setting a good example for me.”

Harlowe’s eyes start to swim again with tears at the speeches. Sometimes, she really can’t stop the tears, her eyes become a leaky faucet. Koha turns it over to Calum to recite his vows. “Esha’s a little too on the nose with her speech. I suspect someone read my vows,” he jokes, raising an eyebrow at her. “But, Harlowe, we’ve seen nearly twenty years together. It is by no mistake that I asked you to marry me in the middle of your empty apartment. I promise to be there. I promise to choose you, to choose us, to choose our family. I was wrong then to think it would be an honor to have you call yourself my wife. The real honor is that I get call myself your husband, to have been there for every poem you’ve written, to have gone to the readings I could, to crash your lectures, to watch you grow three beautiful children, to see you raise three amazing people and I get to be right at your side. I will be there for the next twenty years and the next twenty after that and the next fifty after that. I will be there in sickness, in health, for rich or for poor, now, and tomorrow, next week and my next life.” Pulling out the new band, he switches them. “With this ring, I seal my vow to you.”

“God,” Harlowe huffs, fanning herself. “Who’s got the switch to my eyeballs? I’d like to turn them off for now, no more tears,” she laughs. Reading over the vows, she shakes her head. They won’t do. Those are eighteen years old, those are vows from a woman who is entirely different from her now, those are from someone young and naive. She’s older, wiser now. “I vowed to you eighteen years ago, to be there, to support you, to comfort you in wee morning hours, to love you. Those are old. My vows today are to curl up in bed with you at 9 pm, to answer your calls when I get the chance, to listen to you more than I hear you. My vows today to you are to help you raise three kids and not lose our sanity while we’re at it. I vow to love you everyday, to choose to love you, to put blood, sweat, and tears into loving you. I vow to be more vulnerable with you. I vow to lay up on the living room floor after we’ve run our tails off behind Nikau and let you know I still find you attractive, in more ways one. I vow to slow down for you. I vow to nag you to death, but only when you need it. I vow to learn to say yes to help more often. I vow to continue to grow with you. I vow never to be stagnant with you, to always, always grow.”

Esha hands her Calum’s new wedding band. Slipping it out of the box, she takes places the new band on. “With this ring, I seal my vow to you.”

Koha closes his folder. “So, yeah, now’s the part where you two kiss, I guess.”

Calum, with a grin on his face, slides his hand across Harlowe’s round brown cheeks, sealing his mouth over hers. They kiss slow, Harlowe sliding her fingers into the loops of his pants. As they part, she ducks her head into his chest, inhaling his scent, tightly gripping the fabric of his shirt. “I love you so much, Calum.”

“I love you too, Harlowe.”

The reception takes place at the Small World Mall in the park. Music plays, until a drum beat starts up. Harlowe knows that sound; she listens to it when she dances, when she’s homesick for a place she’s never step foot in. She watches Calum, Koha, and even Nikau walks over to the center of the dance floor. Harlowe sees Esha sliding out of her shoes and completes the tiny circle in the middle of the dance floor. Harlowe, who kicked out of her shoes, long ago, dances her way into the middle. The moves are not accurate--she knows she’s doing them wrong. But the music is transporting her, the tall drums stretched with hide make her feel at peace.

Around the small circle of Calum, Te Koha, Esha and Nikau, her family makes a circle around them. Then a third bigger circle wraps around. And all the while, as the drum steadily rings out, people shouting in different Native tongues, Harlowe bounces on her heels in the center. She hikes the skirt of her dress in one hand, a cry ripping over her throat. She’s not sure where it comes from, who it is for, but it leaves her so loudly, with so much force, she bows. She cannot stand upright. When her eyes open, she knows it’s not tears--she knows it is spirits descending and ascending, meeting in a rainbow above her head. As soul touches soul, there is no barrier here.

The drumming fades. Calum collects her into his arms, beads of sweat running down her forehead. The circles, rings of connected, physically break, but emotionally and mentally still remain. Harlowe rocks in Calum’s arms, voice gone from all the emotion stealing it. She cries into his chest, only a breathy, “Thank you,” tumbling from her lips.

Harlowe excuses herself to the bathroom, sweat still rolling down her skin. Calum returns to the table, sitting down next to Koha. He immediately starts to speak. “I know I said I wanted to talk later, but I guess now feels more appropriate,” his son starts. “People are mean, and I know they always will be. But like, it hurts to hear them say stuff about you.”

Calum nods, resting his arm around Koha’s chair. “It’s always hard to hear it about yourself.”

“A lot of people ask me questions about being black and like what’s it like in America and what it means to be Māori too. I don’t mind that, but I hate it when they ask me how does it feel to be white too. Like, as if somehow that part of me erases everything else I am. As if I’m somehow not really Black and Māori too. Like I wish I could show them this, show them how real I am. But I can’t.”

Turning in the seat, Calum stares down at his son. He can’t change what makes up his son, can’t change the way he looks. “Look at me Te Koha.” Koha lifts his gaze from the center of the dancefloor to his father. “You are you; you know who you are. Changing yourself to appease them will only hurt you. What do they want? For you to be darker? Then they will ridicule you for that. If you’re lighter, they’ll tell you you are lying about who you are. They will never be satisfied. The question is are you satisfied with you. Are you happy with yourself? If you can say yes to that, then their opinions don’t matter. This is all easier said than done of course. It takes time to be happy with yourself. But you take it one step at a time. You be happy with the way your hair looks one day. Then be happy with your skin. Then be happy with your nose. Then be happy with your hair and skin. One thing at a time. All the self love that builds, they’re words won’t be able to get in.”

Koha nods. He gets what his dad is saying. But why did life always have to go for the long play? Why wasn’t there an easier solution? “That makes sense. But what do I do for now? That’s a long play; I’ve got issues right now.”

“For now, you live in this moment. You live among your people, your family, the circle of love surrounding you. That’s what you do right now.”

Koha chuckles, staring back out to the dancefloor. “I remember some of the Haka. Not all of it.”

“I’ll put in a special request for tomorrow. A crash course, your Mum will love it.”

Grinning, Koha nods up at his dad. “Thanks, Dad. I’d like that.”

“What else is family for?”

#calum hood #calum hood fanfic #calum hood fic #calum hood imagine #dad!cal #dad!calum series #dad!cal series #calum hood blurb #5sos #5sos fanfic #5sos fic #5sos imagine #5 seconds of summer fanfic #5 seconds of summer fic #5 seconds of summer imagine #5 seconds of summer #h writes

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embarrassingsmartphonegame · 5 years ago

Text

Anything (Chapter 6, Final Chapter) - Nik Ryder x f!MC

Summary: After surviving an attempt on her life, she discovers there are worse fates than dying. And they’re all ice cold.

Warnings for this chapter: implied (off-screen) N*FW, discussions of trauma and therapy, a short tid bit at the end involving animal violence/death, and plenty of fluff and other domestic stuff

Links to previous chapters: one // two // three // four // five

One year later…

Nothing.

‘Everything.’ Leah thought fondly as she sleepily stared at the man sleeping next to her. Thin rays of golden light trailed through the spaces between the blinds of the window facing the bed, making the man in question flutter his eyes open. She smiled brightly and moved closer until she was snuggled close to him, and he lazily wrapped an arm around her.

“Too early…” Nik grumbled, pulling Leah closer to his chest with both arms. “Go back to sleep.”

“I don’t wanna get up either, but we gotta,” Leah said with her voice muffled against his bare chest. “We have things to do today.”

Leah giggled as Nik groaned, releasing her and rolling over on his other side. She learned quickly in the past year that he was not a morning person due to the frequency they have to take down the things that happen to go bump in the night. So she, who happened to be a morning person and seemingly full of boundless energy, became the default alarm clock (and a damn good one if she said so herself).

“Come on, sleepy head! Time to get up!” she declared, sitting up and letting the cool morning air hit her own exposed chest. Nik rolled back over and let his eyes trail appreciatively over her form.

“Well damn, you’ve convinced me.” Leah blushed at his comment and his eyes glued to her body. Besides the night she came back, only a few months prior she wouldn’t take her shirt off in front of him, self conscious about her scars being examined so thoroughly by someone she actually cared about. She briefly recalled the night she let him see them intimately, and the memory of him being so patient and tender with her made her melt. Leah playfully nudged him.

“Now is not the time for that; we have quite a day ahead.”

“I know, I know. But can’t a guy appreciate his woman on a fine sunny morning?” Nik grinned innocently and propped himself on one elbow, completely scarred abdomen in full view. Leah ran a hand through his soft but sticking-out-in-all-directions morning hair, smoothing it back into place somewhat.

“You can appreciate me as we get ready to leave.” With that, Leah jumped out of their bed and began looking through the closet. Nik got up after her and wrapped his arms around her, and Leah sighed, pretending to be exasperated.

“You’re gonna have to stop touching me, babe.”

Nik glided his rough, callused hands on her skin, and he nipped at her neck not-so-gently. “Not what you said last night, babe.”

Leah felt a shiver run up her spine as she turned around so they were face to face. She rested her arms on his shoulders and gazed up at him, a challenge in her eyes. “Oh yeah? I don’t recall any of that.”

“Need me to remind you, huh?” He pulled her even closer by the waist and brought his lips down to hers passionately, and she enthusiastically reciprocated. They kissed freely because there was nothing stopping them; that little apartment was their place. No monsters, no ghosts, nothing trying to kill them. And she relished these moments of peace.

“Mmm, I might remember something…” Leah pulled away slowly. She turned around with one of her hands grasping his behind her, leading him to the bathroom. “But we’re on a schedule. Come remind me in the shower?”

When she turned around to look at him, his face was split into a bright smile as he hurried after her.

==============================================

Half an hour later, the two Nighthunters sat at the small kitchen table, both dressed and ready for the day. In the past year since Leah moved in with Nik, the apartment had changed significantly. Besides the fact that Nik was more motivated to do upkeep on the place, Leah put her own touches. What once were stacks of potentially cursed books and tomes scattered on the floor were now neatly placed in a modern glass bookshelf and organized alphabetically. All of the weapons were cleaned and polished and displayed neatly. She even found pictures of Nik and Elijah from when he was younger and framed them, and the misty eyes she got from him when he saw what she did was all the thanks she needed. He would freely admit that she made everything in his life better, and she could finally say that she was home. That place was now their home, warm and welcoming.

Leah hummed contentedly as she stirred the cinnamon in her coffee like she usually did, and Nik perused the newspaper casually.

“I still don’t see the appeal of cinnamon in coffee,” the man next to her said, looking at her cup. “It doesn’t even dissolve all the way.”

“That itself adds to the flavor,” she replied, taking a sip. “I don’t know why you like yours black; do you have to be so dark all the time?”

Nik rolled his eyes, sipping on his own cup of black coffee. “What can I say, darkness is my one defining personality trait.”

“That, and running away from unicorns, ya giant softie.”

“They’re vicious!”

“Vicious and adorable!”

Leah laughed, and Nik couldn’t help but chuckle with her. “Vicious and adorable, huh? Now those are your defining personality traits.”

“Aww you think I’m cute, Ryder?” Leah cooed, smiling coquettishly at him.

“Why you think I keep you around, Mendoza?” Nik replied, using her last name instead of the usual nicknames (rook, babe, sugar, darlin’, etc.). It was rare that he’d use her first name, and Leah was used to responding to a variety of pet names.

“Wow and here I thought you liked me for my mind,” Leah teased. “Or my magic glowy hands.”

At the mention of her powers, the atmosphere suddenly became more serious; they both remembered why it was a special day, besides it being the anniversary of her return to New Orleans. Nik reached over and intertwined their fingers before speaking. “Are you sure you’re ready?”

Leah squeezed his hand and nodded. “Yes. It’s been a year now and I’ve made a lot of progress and stayed away for too long; it’s time.”

“Say the word and we’ll go.”

==============================================

After putting on their signature jackets (and sneaking a few kisses here and there), the pair got into Nik’s car and drove off. They held hands the entire drive and the entire walk through the woods and the open field, and Leah took several deep breaths to calm her nerves. She felt like a specimen on a Petri dish again under the scrutiny of the cathedral guarding Lamrian.

“Hey…” Nik began, bringing their intertwined fingers up to his lips to kiss her hand. “Just remember, I’m here for you. You don’t have to do this alone.”

Leah smiled radiantly. “I know. Thank you.”

A Fae guard approached them from the shadows, and he was as dutiful and tight lipped as Leah remembered from the year before. She waved nervously at him.

“Uh, hey, I know it’s been a while but I’m—”

“I remember.” He bowed deeply and stepped aside, gesturing for them to walk into the cathedral. “Welcome home, daughter of Lamrian.”

Leah and Nik walked into the cathedral, which promptly turned into a familiar grand throne room. Leah could see Lady Thalissa writing on an ornate ledger. She turned back to Nik, who gave her an encouraging nod.

“Go on, then. I’ll be here.”

Leah steadied her breathing and stepped forward towards her stepmother. At the sound of her footsteps, Thalissa looked up from her work.

“Leah…” she whispered, surprise on her Fae features. She immediately cast aside her quill and dashed over, wrapping Leah in a warm hug. Leah breathed in her sweet-pea perfume, instantly feeling comfort.

“I’m sorry I was away for so long. After everything...I needed some time,” Leah apologized, looking her stepmother in the eyes.

Thalissa squeezed her hand. “Do not apologize, my darling. I understand the need for solitude in the midst of grief. Losing my greatest love, losing my son...I could hardly speak to another soul for months.”

Leah looked down in shame. “I hope you and the citizens of Lamrian got my apology. I never meant to disrupt your lives so much.”

Thalissa tilted her chin up, and she smiled softly with tears shining in her eyes. “There are no apologies necessary. Even though we are not bound by blood, I consider you my daughter. Oh how I’ve missed you; the sun is now shining on my heart.”

Leah smiled back, her eyes also filling with tears. “I missed Lamrian and everything in it. I...I was actually able to access my magick a year ago and can do a few things.”

“My dear Elric wanted to teach you Fae magick,” Thalissa began, her expression betraying the scantest hint of surprise at hearing that she could use magick in a significant way. “I would keep that promise for him, should you wish it.”

Leah smiled impishly. “Will you teach me how to make grimfire?”

Thalissa let out a surprised laugh, pinching her cheek affectionately. “Let’s begin with the basics.”

She turned and drew a glowing portal into the starry fields of the Fae Realm. She stepped into the portal and gestured for Leah to join her. Leah looked back at Nik, hesitating for a moment on the border between her two worlds. He gave her a small wave.

“Don’t be gone too long, all right? You and I have a date with a rampaging ghoul later.”

Leah visibly relaxed, knowing that her home in the mortal world wouldn’t leave once she stepped into the Fae world. “Wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

Taking a deep breath, she walked through the shining portal, joining Thalissa. The portal closed behind them as she inhaled the smells around her.

“Maybe Cal was onto something...it does smell different than the human world,” Leah mused, taking in everything around her as they walked.

“I take it your friends have been helping you adjust to your new life?”

Leah grinned. “Definitely. You remember Cal, Katherine, and Vera? And that man with me was Nik, my partner.”

Thalissa smiled genuinely. “Of course! Such a nice group, and that man is clearly enamored with you.”

“I don’t know how I got so lucky,” she replied, shaking her head in disbelief. “After Elric died, I just...I ran away. I couldn’t take it and I was destroying myself. It took a friend flying all the way to Wyoming and my father to appear to me for me to come to my senses.”

“Ah, yes. My darling also came to visit me shortly after he passed,” Thalissa said, a dreamy look on her face. Leah took a good look at her and noticed even more fine lines on her face in the starry lighting of the open field. “I could hardly function, but remembering that he was always watching me helped. And your message gave me hope that you would one day truly return.”

“And I’m here,” Leah corroborated. “It took a lot of group therapy and grief counseling with my friend Katherine, who’d also lost someone. Things weren’t suddenly all better just because I moved, but they’re getting there. I got a new life by giving my old one away, and I don’t regret that for one moment.”

Thalissa squeezed her hand. “Wise words from such a young one. You’re right; it will take time to heal this hurt, both personally and for our people. But I’m happy I can have my daughter with me now. Oh, and I almost forgot: Cassie will be so happy to see you too.”

“She’s been with you this entire time?” Thalissa nodded and Leah smiled radiantly, remembering her perrikin.

Leah’s heart had never felt so full that day as they continued to talk and Thalissa taught her the basics under the magickal sky. As she said her goodbyes later with promises to return for more lessons and to engage the people of Lamrian at a later date, and as she and Nik (and Katherine) hunted that night, Leah took it all in with a huge smile on her face. To think that she was once stuck in a dead end job in Wyoming and no knowledge of who she truly was. It had been a life-changing year, but she wouldn’t trade it for anything.

==============================================

In an unnamed part of the bayou, two female figures cloaked in black hoods stood side by side. Fireflies buzzed around, the only source of light in the night. The one with many faces and even more memories of time spoke first.

“The thrice-cursed son finally figured out it was I who hired him. He was not pleased when he confronted me today. Shame it took him so long; mortals are unfortunately so slow.”

The woman next to her, who did not have quite as many faces, scoffed in response. “You think that’s bad? She still thinks it was a coincidence that her dimwit friend and dead father showed up on the same night!”

The Fate turned to her, her face suddenly wrinkled and full of anger. “What did I tell you about using your magick for things like this?”

The woman rolled her chocolate brown eyes. “Cassiopeia did a real number on her by sending that monster. Things were going to get worse if I didn’t step in!”

“You forget, Jacqueline, that I am the only one who can foresee. This is my final warning not to meddle in which you do not know!”

With that, the Fate evaporated away, leaving her alone with her thoughts. The witch silently walked away eventually, and in the process walked by a giant dead alligator. She shook her head at the site and disappeared into the shadows.

==============================================

A/N: Anddd that’s it, folks! At least for this story. Surprise, I managed to finish it within 2019! I’ll see you all when I’m well under way my next Nightbound series. Thanks again for reading and I hope you have an amazing start to the new year 💗💗💗

My tag list will be in a comment because I had to bring my laptop in for repair, and my iPad makes it too difficult to do the tags in the post itself.

#nightbound #playchoices #choices: stories you play #nik ryder #nik x mc #nightbound nik #choices fanfiction #choices #pixelberry #playchoices fanfiction #phoebe writes choices #(bet y’all weren’t expecting this lmao)

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