#also my two fave boys are in the thumbnail

[ppenguinpperson]

cardiomyocytes and connective tissue @nopanamaman

I’ve wanted to do a fic like this for some time now, a ‘thank you’ letter to PAFL and its community of sorts. I’m happy I finally got around to writing it:) 

I wasn’t sure whether I should do this or not, but, hey! It might make someone feel a bit better!! Or, reading the fic will. That’s enough reason, I think, and you don’t have to read this, of course, no matter who you are.

First of all, I want to talk about PAFL a bit.

The first PAFL song I listened to was PiP. I saw its thumbnail when listening to some other music youtube, and so, I listened to it. Oh boy am I glad I did:) I remember thinking how cool it is that someone's making songs for their OCs and that people are interested in them. I could see so much love for the characters in it. I was so happy when I discovered there were more songs like that!! This was around when Comfort Zone had first come out, a week or two after at most. That was two years ago. I’ve been obsessed ever since.

I love PAFL. I genuinely love that songs haven’t been coming out much lately. Like, there’s media that comes out weekly and sucks shit. I’m glad Ferry is taking their time with this!!! Even if all we get each year is one song, that’s cool, because the community is wonderful and we also get doodles and art and now patreon stuff.. yippee yay… !!! And even if we didn’t. who the fuck caressss!!!!! I love coming up with AUs and OCs and theorizing with my friends!!! the time between songs gives us time to do all that:)

The characters are so charming. Every member of the cast has been a fave of mine at some point or another. They’re all so, real! I love them! I love how they fuck up and I love how they get fucked over and I love how they get exploded and killed and shot and hugged and saved and helped!!! They’re human… might not make sense, but i rlly do like them…

It’s so neat looking back at older songs and seeing how stuff’s changed. The art style, the music, it’s all so nice to look back on. Even if I wasn’t there for it.

And don’t even get me started on the worldbuilding..  Everyone say thank you to Boris Strugackij and Arkadij Strugackij for making roadside picnic and inspiring Ferry to make this… so lovely and neat. wonderful. I have not read it myself, but I might, just to be able to make my own pafl OCs more swagger..

So. This fic.

I can’t mention two years ago without at least mentioning my depression.

I can’t remember most of last year, speaking truthfully. Parts of 2021 are also fuzzy. Depression and anxiety are terrible, would not recommend. This feels cheesy to say, but it does get better!!! Slowly, unsteadily, it gets better!!! I don’t mean for this part of the post to be a ‘feel bad for me’ thing at all. Do not. I am safe and healthy now and I couldn’t be happier to be here right now.

Is life good now?? Sorta, but what matters to me right now is, I’m happy!!! It feels so surreal. I never thought I’d be like this. A part of me wants to be angry, to get depressed again about how I could have been happy all this time. But I won’t!!! Because then I’d spiral and forget another year, and, I don’t want that!

Which is so cool!!! I can like, fucking, do stuff now!! I can throw away the bad thoughts, embrace the good ones, encourage myself!!! I do things!!! I go outside and goddd dude that’s so good!! I go outside!!!

I’m doing stuff! I’m drawing, writing, cleaning my room, taking care of myself!!! If I didn’t stay alive to enjoy these small joys, what am I even here for?? 

And I’m alive!!! I’m here!!! I made it, I’m here, writing this on 10th november, 2023, and I’m ALIVE!!!! How cool is that??? 

And yea, the world is shitty, it sucks ass, but, my friends don’t!!!:3 and that’s more than enough for me… SHOUT OUT TO MY FRIENDS!!! I LOVE YOU DUDES!!!

Moving on:

It doesn’t feel right to say that I’m here now only to PAFL. But, what I can say is that it’s been a wonderful crutch for me!! It’s been something to focus on, something silly, but also something I can relate to, and something that inspires me to make my own stuff! I’d most likely still be here, were it not for these silly songs.. but, not sure I’d be as alive as I am now! Unsure if my heart would feel right in my chest! And I wouldn’t have met my amazing friends!!!! Everyone here is so nice.

Dima may be a bit OOC in this fic, and that's because! This fic is based on my own experiences, which, i don’t think is bad…

I could talk here forever about how it gets better. Butttt to be quite honest I don’t wanna lol. I just wanna say, Thank you! to Parties are for Losers, for being cool. 

(Though I also wanna say, don’t put Ferry on a pedestal, they’re human, we all make mistakes, all that stuff.)

Ok time to go back to my manly Sergei ways and never talk about emotions ever again. or as anya would say: FUCK IT WE BALL!!!!!

[airenyah]

Your essay on Joong's underrated acting skills deepened my Joong appreciation so much, that I watched Mafia the Series, I'm watching Ploy's Yearbook (even though there is a serious lack of Joong so far), and I'm planning on watching The Warp Effect too. I haven't watched het shows in over ten years, so this is a big deal! 😂 I really liked him with Dunk in their shows, but MTS gave me another facet of him, because he's so timid in it, unlike in SIMM and HA, where he's (seemingly) very cool and in control. So thank you for making me a full time Joong (and Dunk) girl 💜

i saw this message first thing in the morning when i woke up yesterday and it instantly put me in a good mood!!! <3

YESSSSSS I'M SO HAPPY TO HEAR THAT

mafia the series might actually be my absolute fave thai het-show, it's just SO funny!!!! and the entire cast is so great, like, not just joong but the entire cast plays off each other SO well. and don't even get me started on gina virahya and her portrayal of anna kondra!!!!

you know, when i went into mafia the series i saw the poster and was like "ughh i really am gonna have to sit through this standard (overly) dramatic mafia show just for joong, huh. the things i do for my boy..." and then. AND THEN. you can imagine my surprise. i was crying tears of laughter throughout the show and i was actually laughing so hard that my mom made a comment about how she could hear my laugh in my room

beam is my loser boy and joong portrays him in such an adorably awkward way, i love it <333

and yes there IS a serious lack of joong in ploy's yearbook so far :((((

it was quite funny tho bc in the one scene where joong does show up i immediately recognized him by the back of his head, like!! i saw this:

and instantly went "OH there's my boy!!!!!" 😂😂😂

and i can't wait to see him with film bc film did extremely well with gun in not me and i feel like film and joong will also work together really well

you know, i'm always happy to turn people into full time joong (and dunk) girls!!!!!!

i've adored them ever since simm which i watched live from ep2 onwards. fun fact, actually: when i started simm i actually had no idea who they were (even though technically i'd seen dunk in bad buddy already, except i wasn't paying attention to the random high school bandmates and so i didn't actually recognize dunk and only realized later on ahahah)

aaaanyway, i had no idea who they were, right? and so in 2022 my mom and i spent two nights in prague during easter and in the evening we were in our hotel room and we were kinda looking for something to watch. and i was like "hey look, gmmtv has a new bl out and it looks kinda cute and fluffy judging by the thumbnails?? and like something that doesn't require too much brain power?? plus, there's also only two eps out so far, so we'll be caught up right away" and so we watched the first two episodes and then the two of us ended up watching every new ep together every week hahaha

i actually didn't really talk about it on tumblr back then and when you go back on my blog you'll see that there are hardly any simm post. but really, with every new simm episode that aired i liked joongdunk more and more. and especially once the characters started dating i was actually so in awe about just how comfortable joong and dunk were with each other and how they absolutely weren't afraid to touch? like, their physical affection was just so casual, like it was the most natural thing in the world to them in an "i'm-not-even-thinking-about-it-bc-it's-so-normal" kind of way and that was just soooo refreshing to watch?? i was (and still am) truly amazed

and when just a couple of months later, at the end of 2022 gmmtv announced joongdunk were gonna get another show together i got SO excited!! and also when it was revealed that simm was included in our skyy 2!!!!

and then hidden agenda started airing and then i was tagged in that tag game and then i went to watch joong's entire filmography and then i ended up falling into a joongdunk rabbit hole and here we are...

anyway, i have multiple agendas and one of them is turning people into joong fans and dunk fans and joongdunk fans sllksdfd

and my other agenda is getting people to watch mafia the series, bc it's truly a gem of a show!!!!

(speaking of agendas: the only thing that's missing in your message is you telling me that you approve of my fight for a sexy joongdunk vampire bl, like... that would have made the message and the influence of my joong/dunk/joongdunk blogging complete 😂😂😂)

[mikkock]

fun fact i had an assignment for today except i thought today was tomorrow n i so i had to do two days of planned work in one but in the end it turned out fine so i allowed myself to draw lotta things as a treat for working so hard.

      cream - lisa - wenhua

[dl4draws]

delfi!!

no idea when exactly you're starting your break and if i'm already too late; i just gotta say this real quick. (i'm also writing this while sitting in a chemistry lesson, so i'm sorry if this is a bit incoherent)

first of all, whether you see this before or after your break, you deserve it! take care of yourself!

struggling with your own art is something i relate to a lot and it sucks, but please be kind to yourself. i hope you get to a point where you feel better about your art soon, even though that's a hard journey sometimes, you'll get there.

your blog here has become somewhat of a comfort blog for me and you're a big inspiration. (definitely didn't paint sokka with freckles because of you cough cough)

i don't know where exactly i was going with this (because my brain is the size of a peanut) but i guess i just wanted to say that you're awesome, and not just because of your lovely art but in general. you deserve a break, take as much time as you need and be kind to yourself. we'll all welcome you back with open arms! stay safe💕

here's another pretty sunrise from a few days ago lol

hi!! i’m over here sobbing thank you 

i’m very thankful that this time it didnt take me two years to start drawing for real again, that happened, it was a nightmare tm,, it took exactly two days of literally not drawing anything for me to want to draw so bad i painted something in three hours, it was insane djksfhdf my hand was itching to draw so bad

i’m so glad my little corner of the void brings you comfort, that makes me really happy!! i try to draw wholesome or silly content often (except for the hanahaki au, let’s all collectively ignore that very non wholesome au) because it makes me happy, and if it makes you guys happy as well then it gives me even more joy :D

also please let me know if you ever post that sokka drawing because i would love  to see more freckled sokka, he’s my fave <3

trying to draw everyday was honestly the thing that made me want to take a break tho, i literally disliked every single doodle i posted 😓 

thank you so much for the lovely message 🥺 i missed you guys so im back, break was shorter than expected but i started thinking about all the stuff i might be missing and the interactions with the zukka nation, and just went, i’m better now, i’ll take my time with drawing and that’s okay, so boom baby here i am :D

i also worked A LOT on the au lol, finished thumbnailing all of the hanahaki comic, and created a carrd specifically for blackout racing lmk if you guys want to see it, and wrote a lot as well!! didn’t draw the boys but i’ll go back to that soon <3

sunrise pic!!!!!! love love love!!!

hope you’re having a wonderful day <3

[tumblunni]

MORE UPDATES ON THINGS WHAT HAPPEN

The half week milestone of the hospital house thingie time! I think the term they use for it is "a residential stay"? Cos like its not a hospital its a shared housing block thats just full of doctors. I get to sleep in a real bed and there's a nice community room and board game nights and stuff. But its still really scary how intense the supervision can be! Like they have a window to look into your room once per hour every hour constantly. And they have to go through your undies and catalog them as part of the possessions check. I was not warned about that and it was mega embarassing trying to explain a binder to a bunch of old lady doctors! Oh and i had yo do a urine test today which was possibly the most fuckin embarassing thing in the actual universe. And you're not even allowed to take your own pills! They keep them locked in a big ominous wall of lockers and you have to come into the office and swallow the pill while theyre watching. I guess maybe because some people might be faking their illness and selling their pills on the black market or whatever? But that literally doesnt happen with antidepressants, they have no 'high' or even any effect at all on non-sick people. So it just makes no sense to me and its real embarassing cos like i said i suck at taking pills with plain water and without a straw. The ones i take are real damn chunky things the size of my thumbnail! I think i'l get better at not (literally) choking under pressure over time, tho. Hopefully.

Anyway that's all the bad out of the way! Now the good and the neutral and the just miscellaneous!

Its still nervewracking having to shower in a shared house but they have a cool walk-in shower and ive never tried one of those so it was vaguely interesting. And im allowed to take my showers early at 6am to minimize the chance of anyone else trying to use the door, lol. My biggest fear is having some staff member walk in on me when im naked like back in that homeless hostel. Oh or that time in the homeless hostel where the teenage boys filled the entire bathroom with inflated condoms wall to wall. Like wow so much damn effort to prank the stupid nervous bunni who probably would have been embarassed by literally anything else. Man this place is bringing so many memories of that homeless hostel but at least this time its a place specifically for sick people and they know i'm anxious doing shared cooking and board games and whatever so they dont make fun of me for it. But in a lot of ways that hostel had more freedoms too.. *shrug*

Anyway! A good! I get to have cooking lesson!! I know literally nothing about cooking and now i get to know several thing!! This nice doctor called Josie taught me how to make an omelette and i tasted ham for the first time! That is just how limited my life experiences are, lol. Oh and they want me to say that she's a 'mental health worker' not a doctor, but its all real confusing?? Like they have the staff that look after you and then the only ones we're supposed to call doctors are the ones who actually have the authority to prescribe pills and diagnosies. But like if youre in a hospital you'd call them all doctors, not just the actual surgeon? Or i guess theyre kinda like nursing home staff?? But they cant be support workers cos support workers are specific government assigned inspector type guys like Richard who only meet with you once a week.and i have to remember to not call him a social worker either cos social workers only work with family and custody related stuff. I dunno?? Basically the medical industry has a lot of names that dont really describe what the actual thing is, lol. Anyway the ham omelette was great and now im gonna try and remember so i can try and make it myself next time! HAM ACCOMPLISHED

Also i played bingo with a few other patients and it was fun but funny that i lost 6 times in a row when there were only 3 of us. I got a consolation prize of a pack of neon highlighter pens so hell yeah!!

I'm getting booked in to try some additional classes starting next week on monday and tuesday morning. The computer programming one was sadly unavailable, but i managed tp snag a place in "confidence building group therapy" and "basic how to use power tools". I wasnt really all that interested in that one but i thought it would be a useful skill even if its less fun. And maybe you get to actyally make something to take home at the end? A lil shelf to help organize this awkward lil room better, maybe?

And an unexpected bonus of being semi-hospitalized is that i get a free bus pass! And cos im here cos of my social anxiety theyre gonna help me get outside more and actually use this thing to the fullest! The first thing we did was the trip to actually get the bus pass itself. It was like "bus, take my money to take me to the place where i can never give you money again!" XD Ive been really stupidly nervous about going on tne bus in my old neighbourhood cos MAN it was really isolated there and everything just amplified my mental illness. An almost two hour bus ride to get to ANY SHOPS AT ALL, with only one bus for the whole town so it was always crowded and full of screaming kids and gossipy everyones. Social anxiety: maximum level proud mode!

So yeah i feel BIG ACCONPLISHED! I was able to take this bus for the first time with a doctor coming with me. Power Grandpa The Strong. His actual name is Paul and he has awesome sleeve tattoos of like anchors and dragons and sports teams and stuff! And he likes thrift stores and wearing silly hats too! Its like he's powerful enough to wrestle away everyone's anxieties! I was able to be a bit reckless too and i went out wearing my fave shirt thats like trans pride coloured plaid. A POWERFUL SHIRT IS REQUIRED FOR THIS QUEST! so we went to the office to register this bus pass and i panicked a bit cos apparantky we brought the wrong form and i wrote my name in the wrong box and then my passport photo looked terrible and aaa! But it all worked out and i was kinda freaking out for nothing. And he took me for a lil tour of the place and showed me this cool shop that does spray paint tye dye t shirts with spiderman on them?? Why does this incredibly specific shop exist and how have i never heard of it before?? There was also a new harry potter shop next to the disney shop, and the old used book store i used to visit as a kid was still there, complete with rickety spiral staircase and ominous basement trap door. I'm still not brave enough to go down there, but apparantly its just the history books section so meh. Then we actually went to a fancy coffee shop and i had this brain freeze mango ice frappucchino thing! Im trying all the new foods!!

And i was TOO HIGH ON DECADENCE and made a RECKLESS CHOICE! i blame power gramp's amazing tattoos, they were totally whispering to me that i shoukd screw the rules and ride off into the sunset on a metaphorical harley davidsen of mental health

So i was like Hey Paul I Am Totally Fine Getting Home On My Own, and it was like i was floating off in the distance somewhere begging my body to not speaketh these words. But it ended up working out okay! The excitement of it all and the sense of accomplishmebt from getting there all okay allowed me to mostly not freak out as i spent the day in town and looked at some shops and stuff. Basic Living Skills: Completed! I chilled out in the library (tho i dont have a card yet, alas!) and visited like five comic and anime stores, and got lost but found a Pizza Hut and that was SO NOSTALGIC FOR MY CHILDHOOD and it didnt taste quite as good as i remembered but the waiter guy was super nice and had a similar shirt and it was All Good! Oh and i gave all my money to a homeless person and that's why i'm broke now. And i bought a plastic slug! I just saw it from across the room and was like OH NO I AM BEING MAGNETISED TOWARDS IT OH NO IT HAS ALREADY BEEN BOUGHT. I need to think of a name for this new friend!!

So yeh i got home okay and i felt really acconplished and that was the furthest trip away that i've taken in ages! Man my mental illness makes me feel pathetic, but it also brings ridiculously big joys from the smallest of silly acconplishys!

Oh and thank you so much to the people who sent me emails! It really helped so much to keep me from giving up during the first few days before i made a bit of progress and felt like i could really do this, yknow? Especially big thanks tp the friend who sent me that mysterious super happy song that they found on a mystery disc in a german market?? Im still not sure whether its in greek or hasidic jewish but it sounds AMAZING and i hope someday i can figure out the band so i can hear their other singles!

Ok this is bunni out! BIG HUGS FOR THE EVERYONE AAAA

[sye216-fr]

Lair review for Klazomaniac #286157

@rarewubbox​  I’m really sorry that it took me so long to get to this review!! my general writing muse decided to take a vacation the past few days and I had to hunt it down and wrangle it before i could get myself to write anything. i hope you like the review even if it took like a week for me to get to.

aleele here was the first dragon i really noticed, but that’s mostly because the blues of the ghost flame apparel drove my eyes to her. i really liked the contrast between the low-saturation dark hues of her colors against the blues of the apparel. it really makes her visually POP. i also like how the candles are actually incorporated into the lore in the bio? a dragon with a weird entourage of ghostly floating candles is mysterious indeed. contender for cool mom of the year. also, if she’s your random progen, congrats on getting an XYY!! talk about good luck.

another darkly colored fae yes, but the faes in ur lair are Good. this guy got my attention with all that purple. he looked like quite an interesting foresty fellow from the thumbnail, and then i got in there and read the little bit of lore in his bio and all of a sudden all the apparel made him Sinister. i love a good maniacal power hungry nature-fueled villain character. the small amount of lore in the bio just made me want to know more, like hear about some of his particular escapades. does he bother the rest of the clan or does he work in secret? inquiring minds would like to know 👀

oh MAN i love the foreboding quote in this boy’s bio because it immediately gives him and his outfit the most EERIE atmosphere. the plague primal eyes especially add to that. he didn’t look all that plaguey from the thumbnail so when i read that quote i was thrown for a loop and then i scrolled up and saw his eyes and was like “oh. im Terrified.” i like how the nightsky silk scarf and the cornflower bee give this sort of delicate look, then you see the armor pieces and the furious claws and you gradually realize this is not a dragon you wanna be messing with. i sure as hell ain’t gonna be caught staring someone down whos got eyes like THAT. he comes into the room and im already gone

in my previous lair reviews ive gone on a bit about that Fire Aesthetic which i like so much. this girl has DEFINITELY got a good hold on that. the accent matches SO well with the black iron plates it’s unbelievable. the fire and the lava are almost exactly the same color and it looks fucking fantastic. plus the steampunk pieces give that clunky heavy metal feeling that’s so good in the fire aesthetic. plus the mauve spines add a nice little dash of pinky-purple to match with the shadow eyes, like a tiny dash of sprinkles on top of the lava sundae. i wanna shake her hand but the superheated lava coming from the black iron plates would burn my hands and i would be okay with it.

i think observer here might be my fave dragon in ur lair. the fest skin is, of course, gorgeous on him (i love the glowing mushrooms of the shadow aesthetic). but not only does it look nice, it makes sense to his title as scavenger?? like mushrooms are agents of decay and renewal that make use of what’s left behind, and scavengers look for things left behind to find and use again. the skin on top of the black birdskull pieces really give that effect. also can i just say the soil primary works wonderfully with that skin?? it really does look like the mushrooms on the skin are growing out of dirt. perfect combination of skin and colors.

i may not have a lot of snappers in my lair but i can appreciate a good High Quality Bean when i see one. i really love how well the peacock goes with the cyan-y accent beads in the celebration sage set, the white looks really good next to the light parts of the outfit too. plus orange+brown next to peacock just looks good period? it’s a nice combo of colors for this dragon. i like how her title is celebrationist. i want her to organize a party for me bc something else me it would be one hell of a party.

listen i had no idea that this specific part of the blue range could work SO well with the sweetheart lace set but i feel like i’ve seen the light..tiger+stripes may not be all that popular lately but i really like how it looks on razor, especially with stonewash+teal. these two blues play nice together, and then the sweetheart lace pieces kind of make me think of decorations on a cake? like the little roses look like icing roses. and then his eyes being that rich earth common brown just pop right out. a lot of people laud matching eyes on a dragon but tbfh sometimes non-matching eyes can add a real nice dimension in the color palette, especially on spirals since their eyes are so big. i wanna be friends w him.

okay first: i like the idea of having a series of dragons named after each holiday?? it’s a cool idea for representing each flight as reps in your lair. next: a lot of people say crackle is a bad gene but i am under the impression that crackle can look DAMN AMAZING if you get the right gene/color combo. and here? the eldritch crackle on top of double fire looks just like lava. if there were a dragon that ever looked like a pure concentration of fire, it would be with this specific combo of genes and colors. it works SO damn well that the effect is perfected even with a small amount of apparel. i looked at this dragon and immediately went “she is Lava.” i love her. burn me up.

(i know brightshine technically comes after flameforger but flameforger caught my attention first cough) light is another aesthetic i’m fond of and this is DEFINITELY a good-ass light dragon. i had no fucking idea murk irishim could match well with colors like ivory and gold but holy FUCKING moley that’s a nice combination. the highlights on the murk shimmer next to the brightness of the ivory crystal just makes the murk look like a really dark metal? like really tarnished bronze. and the intense gold of the sundrapes do a great job of calling to attention the veins of REALLY intense golden yellow that run through the ivory crystal. she’s so shiny. i wanna polish her but she probably doesnt need it..

[boojersey]

i am about to go to bed but! today was my first day of the spring semester and it was!! pretty okay, college is just Like That yknow? and for songs, go check out poor boy by the regrettes, stop digging by skating polly, and always right by hands off gretel! (im in a female fronted punk/pop punk mood!!) also, if u wanna do multiples of 8 for the rawring 20’s asks, go off!! (hopefully this helps as a distraction, sending good vibes!!)

i understand what you mean the project i thought i might get a failing grade on ended up actually being a b- which is good but i still feel like i shouldve made a quality work so i understand the pretty ok sentiment

song 1. i dig the chorus a lot. really digged playing it at 1.25 speed

song 2. really love the singer’s voice and the angles during the video are rad as hell. the backing vocals also really pull the song together

song 3. knew id love it right from the thumbnail. love this girls batshit yelling. she wrote the book on cool. thank u for the song recs for real

ask time:

8. Do you own a pair of fingerless gloves or skeleton gloves (or the combination)?

hell yes i do i have skeleton fingerless gloves that glow in the fuhking dark !!!! heres a picture of me with them

16. Do you want any tattoos? Of what?

i always want tattoos!! >:) currently still want a traditional piece of a rose with an eyeball in the center and its dripping a tear of blood. other things i want involve bats and retro comic style zombie heads (hmu..) and an mcr tattoo because im dumb. it might be pansy in the font but not curved like it is on the guitar just horizontal along my hip.

24. Do you want any piercings?

always and forever yes indeed. i think an eyebrow would be really fun or maybe another lip. but what i could Really use are daiths and an industrial or two, maybe a helix of some sort. my ears are painfully empty, they only have 4 piercings between the two of them and Two are infected and the other two are always threatening closure.

32. Favourite Fall Out Boy song?

anon i love this question youre a real dimepiece

the (shipped) gold standard and because of this ask i am now listening to my favorite song so i am happie :0) close second is pavlove tho

40. What are some of your favourite lyrics?

https://boojersey.tumblr.com/tagged/fave+lyrics

send me uncomfortably lengthy rawring 20s asks