#also my nails are majorly fucked up

[c0nt3nt-d3le7ed]

i need 2 start matching my nails with my hair

[redhotarsenic]

Many many irl things are happening at the moment that’s why I’ve been gone for so long terribly sorry for that 💀

[erythristicbones]

i don't feel like copying what i wrote, so take some screenshots of me having brainworms for the JDK villains again. primarily spurred by me going "hey wouldn't Nisha and Artemis and Apollo make cool rockstars instead"

[pricescigar]

Albert Wesker NSFW HC's

Note: I've been such a simp for Albert Wesker lately, the brainrot is taking over me at this point... And I decided to make this! Even if I'm supposed to he asleep right about now...

No gender specified, for everyone to enjoy!

18+ ONLY NO MINORS ALLOWED

CW: NSFW stuff, blood

Photo taken by me

Wesker has many pet names for you; Doll, Sweetheart, Love, Baby, Darling, Cutie, Sweetie. Ect, the list goes on.

He loves seeing you wearing his shirts, he actually doesn't mind if you steal them from him. Especially if you wear nothing underneath...

Despite him being a busy man, he's quite experienced man in bed, there are different forms of experiments after all... He's a man full of tricks.

Wesker has a major daddy kink, there's something about having power over you turns him on majorly.

He loves being in control, thanks to his ego, and also because he loves seeing you underneath him.

The first time you wasn't too sure about calling him daddy but giving it a go, you loved it.

"Fuck... That's it, I'm your daddy."

He loves depriving you and making you beg for more, seeing you so overestimated from sex or foreplay satisfy him.

He loves spanking your arse during sex making sure his hand print is left there for him to see. And well, smacking it in general.

Wesker always begs for you to dig your nails into his back, he loves the pain and sensation that comes with it. Even if you draw out a little bit of blood.

He loves Roleplaying with you, something about the build up of it before you two have sex already makes him hard.

Your favourite roleplays to do is Doctor and Paitient.

"My little Patient..."

He still kept his lab coat for fun times in the bedroom, he loves seeing you wearing his labcoat while he fucks you. You're his little patient after all.

Please sit on his face, he doesn't care if he can't breathe just sit on him for God's sake.

One of his favourite punishments to give you is when you masturbate while he watches, depriving you and making you beg for him.

He loves licking your cum and swallowing it, tasting all of your sweet juices. Knowing how good you taste.

You two have a safe word just in case if things go too far, which Is; Raccoon (Referring to Raccoon City)

Occasionally he loves to do Sex in public too, sometimes in alley way or in secluded places like the forest... Sometimes at the beach.

The after care is a bliss, he'd kiss everywhere where he accidentally hurt you caressed your body, clean you and hold you close.

"Was I a little too rough? I'm sorry... I'll make it all better."

He'd always run you baths too if you ever want one with him, and the two of you would relax in the bath before going to bed.

When you're finally in bed heed wrap his arms around you, caressing your waist, back and shoulders before kissing your body ever so gently before falling asleep.

Favourite sex positions:

As basic missionary is— It's still one of his favourites, he loves towering over you... Legs over his waist and pinning your arms over his head.

Doggy another classic one— He prefers doing this when you're hunched over his desk or anywhere else for a quickie.

Mating press— His go to for having sex with you, albeit uncomfortable as well but it's the best way to hit all of those sweet spots.

Having sex against a mirror— One way to fully turn him on, seeing how overestimated you look, barely paying any attention and your mind foggy with all the pleasures.

The 69 — One he does occasionally but there are many other ways he would give you oral pleasure.

Cowgirl — As much ss he loves being dominant, he loves seeing you ride him from time to time.

Face off— He loves being close to you, and with this position it drives him wild anyways.

The Chairman— Another fan favourite of his, the perfect angle to hit your G-spot repeatedly and to pleasure you in all other places.

The OM — Almost the same as The face off position, any excuse to have you close to his body.

Kinks he has:

Daddy kink (Power imbalance)

Bondage (Tie, Belt, ropes, cuffs, anything really)

Blind folds

Gagging (Cloths or and actual gag)

Spanking

Praise Kinks

Roleplay

Knife play (To cut your clothes off)

Choaking

Licking, biting

Hair pulling

Masturbation (Watching you pleasure yourself)

Rough sex / soft sex

Clothed sex

Masochism (Blood kink)

Urobouros (He loves using his tentacles on you, mainly to tie you up)

[queerofthedagger]

not to stir the pot but i’ve seen some really shitty takes recently about arthur being gay and completely erasing gwen’s importance to him. what are your thoughts?

oof well that is in fact a loaded question but I genuinely feel your frustration so let's give this a shot lmao

the short of it, to quote a friend of mine: 2012 tumblr called and wants its shitty shipping discourse back (derogatory)

the slightly longer of it.... to start this off, no one has to ship anything. no one's saying that anyone has to ship anything, or headcanon characters a certain way, or that you're not "allowed" to say that you don't ship certain ships. that's just . not a thing that's happening, and I do wanna reiterate strongly that you don't have to ship anything.

that said, well. maybe if you find yourself with the urge to nail your 'why i don't ship this canon interracial couple' against the proverbial church doors, you should ask yourself.... why is it always the black characters you find "badly written." why is it always the black and the white character who have "no chemistry." why is it always the black character you find unrelatable, that you think would be soo much better suited dating another character of color, etc. etc. These things do not happen in a vacuum, and you don't need to hate or even dislike that character to play into tropes, stereotypes, and issues that very many people have very extensively explained to be less than stellar, to put it mildly.

And Imma come out and say this: fandom is not activism, you don't need to be a loud, outspoken activist and/or turn this into anything more than a hobby. if, even amongst the discussions had in the last years, you have never once stopped to ask yourself how you might deal with the internalized racism that we're all dealing with, how it might affect people in the spaces you share while doing your hobby, then, frankly, you gotta do better. fandom is not activism, but we all have some basic responsibility of not causing more harm than there already is going around. this should not be a controversial statement either.

you can ship merthur without invalidating and trampling all over the frankly brilliant fact that this show went and casted a black woman as queen guinevere. you can ship merthur without taking away scenes that are not about them - god knows there are enough. you can acknowledge that 75% of your shipping takes are subjective, that merthur isn't, wasn't, and was never going to be canon, and literally none of this takes away from the two generic white dudes whose faces you'd like to smash together. this entire fandom is and has been majorly about those two generic white guys, for well over a decade, and i'm saying all this as a white merthur shipper. like, this is the bare minimum. and yet, here we fucking are.

as for the arthur being gay thing - again, you don't need to headcanon anyone a certain way, but whenever i do see this specific headcanon it "somehow" always comes with an incredibly weird (to put this mildly also) understanding of sexuality, top/bottom discourse, and - you guessed it - takes on arwen, that are maybe something people might want to uhh. examine also.

this isn't a callout, or a call for a witchhunt, or or or. personally i block and move on, and I wouldn't have said anything more on this than a vague shitpost on my sideblog, but god knows i can never shut up and even less so when asked, and I do think that while, again, fandom is not activism and I'll stand by this, people should... try and aim to make some basic attempts at not causing harm. it's not even hard (although that should not be your measure but like, again. bare minimum). it really is as easy as not constantly invalidating and side-lining ships and/or characters, by doing basic research in how not to whitewash characters, why not to compare skintone to food when writing, etc.

On that note, none of these are things that I've come up with. A lot of people, especially fans of colour, have done a great deal of work to provide resources and education that are... incredibly easy to find if you can be fucked to make some effort. Imma link a bunch beneath too but like. Yeah I guess that's my take. You can ship whatever you want, genuinely, from the bottom of my heart. But 1. maybe sometimes take some time to consider what you're saying, 2. maybe take some time to do some basic self-education on some issues in general, and 3. writing posts on why you don't ship whatever ship has never accomplished anything beyond getting people who agree with you to stroke your ego, and step on the toes of people who don't. at best.

But also, last but not least, the block button is your friend and all that

Resources by people much better equipped to talk on these things than me:

How to stan the white guy with minimal contribution to fandom's racism problem

The racism in the Merlin fandom and towards Gwen specifically

Educating Merlin - a blog that's specifically tackling racism in this fandom

Fanlore on Fandom's Racism Problem(s) (use to find many links leading you to further discussions on it)

More Fanlore with further links

When white people talk about racism in fandom

Writing with Color - Resource blog for writing specifically, but honestly also covers so many topics that it's incredibly useful for doing some self-examination too

I'm not saying you need to agree with everything said in all of these sources, but also if your constant reaction to these discussions as a white person is to get defensive, to dismiss it, etc., I'm saying this in the nicest way possible: maybe sit with that for a bit. Ask yourself why requests like not constantly making fun of a ship gets you in such a huff. Etc. etc.

Lastly: if people would like to add onto this with more resources, that's highly welcome. That said, anyone clowning/harassing/being a bitch on this post will be blocked.

[turkeyinnovember]

Author’s Notes:

takes place a couple weeks after Den became chaos god, as of now, this is part two of a three part trilogy. uh I may have written pt 2 before I wrote pt 1, and link to ao3 is at the bottom

for the sake of information: chilly, raptor god, can transform into reptilian animals but majorly raptor; den, chaos god, “tattooed” with a rotated-90-degrees yin yang symbol on her back, the two dots are where she can sprout tentacles made of chaos matter. she also grew a lot of eyes that aren’t visible when closed, teeth are sharpened, nails sharpened, etc.; christian is a lava hybrid, bezearts idea, I added the horns and tails onto their concept but a silly quirk is that ash fall from him and his hair has drifts of smoke; Ivan is an alien extended from Kristine’s episode abt aliens, uh he’s weak as fuck is what ive realized while writing this

---------------

Den slumped in her corner of the couch with eyes seemingly landing on the TV. Though, it was a gaze without any actual kind of focus or attention. She fidgeted with her hands in some irritated sort of fashion. 

Her vision was tinted with red and blurrier than the oldest cameras, as they have been ever since the tournament, her godhood. But, recently they’ve started to pulse black from time to time, usually accompanied by headaches and… the souls. They’d ask her to do things. To break, to lash out, to murder, even. And they are so good at appealing to her desires. They are so convincing. 

“Den?” 

It sounded like Ivan, but she couldn’t be sure. There was a barrier, a ringing in her ear that prevented her from focusing on anything other than the hundreds of souls muttering in her head. She glanced up, barely making any attempts to distinguish the blurry figure in her vision.

“Go find someone else, Ivan.” She turned back towards the TV with a small sigh. She had a rough idea of what he wanted — throw out the trash, or return the knife she stole, or maybe something about the rent. None of which she cared to do anything about now, or ever. She opened a minor eye under her left eye — one of the many she grew after the souls were absorbed — although using these minor eyes would only intensify her headaches, some of them had clearer visions than her human eyes. 

Surely there were others who could help with whatever Ivan needed, Den figured. On the other couch piled Chilly and Christian, one hugged a bag of chips to her chest and the other with Shadypaws in his lap. The woman’s blatant ignorance of the other when he reached for the chips, even tilting the bag towards him, was her wordlessly given permission.  

Den smiled at that. There were things said and done during their adventures that would leave her in heavy doubts of their relationship. She would be convinced the others would have her back before something changes that and she couldn’t even trust them enough to willingly entail what weapons she carried with her. 

“…my god Den, it’s your turnnn,” Den couldn’t tell if he was being annoying on purpose by dragging his vowels out. She swore, if he keeps bothering her-

“You can’t keep making me-“

“Shut up, Ivan!” Den practically growled at him. She could tell he was a little surprised by the strange, animalistic noise bubbling in her throat. A neat little trick that came with her transformation. She was almost amused. She ran her tongue over the points of her new teeth, pressing down a little to remind herself of their sharpness. She didn’t know if she missed her old, human teeth, but she did know that she’d have to make a change in her dental plans soon.

“Okayy!” He took half a step up with his hands up, rolling his eyes. Though, with pitch black eyes like his, it was hard to tell anything, “You just like, always force me to…” 

He’s being loud, they said. Den snickered. As if she couldn’t tell? He’s so annoying. Someone needs to shut him up. You should make him shut up. They are right about that, she cocked her head slightly, watching the figure of Ivan. He’s still rambling. The souls are right most of the time. He needs to shut up. He needs to shut up. You should hit him. Hit him. Stab him. Kill him. You should kill him. You should kill him. Kill him. Kill him. Kill him. Den frowned. She rarely tries to reason with the souls, but sometimes they get out of hand. ‘What the fuck?’ She asks them, ‘That’s absurd-’ 

“...and I just feel like- Den? Are you even listening?” Ivan frowned. He leaned forward and snapped in front of her focus-less eyes, “Hey!” 

He’s still talking. She could almost hear them laugh. 

“SHUT UP!” Sometimes, her body move faster than her brain can keep up. She found her left hand gripping Ivan’s collar tight with the tip of her nails turning into claws, narrowly avoiding digging into his skin in her lack of precision. Just make him shut up. Stop him from talking. Shut him up. Shut him up. Shut him up. Den didn’t notice the two getting up from the couch, turning to the commotion, or Shadypaws’ ears flattening out at her in fear. At that moment, her thoughts and the souls’ overlapped. 

Kill him. 

For better or worse, she always kept a knife by her side. Though clearly, it’s for the worse as of current. The amount of commands screamed out by the souls at an instant grew to an all time peak as the distance between her and her goal closed in, reaching a density and volume that it all started to sound like plain static to her. She had completely lost the vision in her normal eyes and a minor eye had opened almost instinctively, providing her with a strangely clear and refreshingly untinted vision. 

Her golden irises reminded Ivan of the stab wound on his leg that hadn't gotten time to heal fully yet. He could still feel the compression of the bandage he wrapped this morning. 

It was hard to recall when exactly Den’s tradition of stabbing him started. He’d forgotten why he’s still hung around this woman, but he certainly regrets it now. He could sense something that was different today. 

In his panicked terror, his hands become discolored and smooth, transforming back into his alien limbs as he pulled desperately to break from Den’s grip on his collar. Unfortunately, despite his alien identity, he had nothing to combat the strength of a god like Den. He rarely ever tried to fight human Den and relied only on verbal protests. Though, something told the past that this time was different from before. Different from the other times she stabbed him. This time felt, and is so much more dangerous, more lethal. He would die right here if he can’t get the fuck out right now. 

The wound on his leg ached more now, foretelling his downfall. What was his mistake? Hanging around these bunch of people, maybe. 

Fuck. 

He screamed as a piercing pain shot through his body from his chest. 

He wanted to cry. For an alien, why did his body structure have to be so similar to a human’s? Out of all the places it could grow, why was his heart the same place as humans’? For that matter, why was he so weak? The woman who raised him told him stories of aliens that were strong and powerful. Capable of saving themselves from the newly inherited chaos god, perhaps.

All the hopes she had for him. 

Others were screaming too. One of the two was familiarly shrill and unbearingly sharp. Accompanied with that was a calming cold that grew at the source of his devastation. Calming, and even… nulling the pain. 

He looked down and found ice spreading out from inside his chest, locking the knife within the ice, holding the knife a few layers of flesh away from piercing his heart. He could feel it, if it’s one perk that came with being an alien. 

Although Chilly was capable of forming ice out of nothing — it was typical of gods to create matter from none — some of it had been made out of his blood, perhaps out of her haste. He dragged his mouth out, as if to laugh. Saved by Chilly Panda, the same woman he nearly killed during highschool, then at the cabin, and a third time at the Raptor Park.  

Her right, still-human hand was stretched in front of her as she ran, twisting and manipulating the ice to prick Den’s hand, forcing her to release the knife. Christian ran by her, racing even faster than the raptor god to attack Den from her back, pulling her a good few steps away from Ivan by grips on an arm and a shoulder. 

“Yo!” He hissed, swinging his left arm over, letting his forearm hit the side of her neck as he reached over for a rear naked choke, forcing Den to turn away from Ivan, “Chill the fuck out!” 

However, nothing stirred her as she looked back with three minor eyes open now, still staring at him as she simply arched back to the side and swung her free arm at Christian, trying to land a claw on him. 

Realizing her intent, Christian immediately released all grip on her, curled a leg up, and kicked her to the floor just in time to avoid getting pierced by the shadowy tentacles that shot out from her back. “The fuck,” He whispered, panting slightly as he retracted. 

Without missing a beat, Chilly encased the chaos god in ice within the second she took to regain her footing, taking care to leave an amount of space for her to lash and wear herself out. With it being her natural element, Chilly’s ice was yet too strong for Den, a new god, to break with ease. 

For a moment, there was a thought like “Oh gods, what did I just do?” that occurred, but it was too quickly drowned out by everything else. Nor could she bring herself to face the fact that she failed to keep sane again. Den was getting worried. Regardless of what she considered Ivan, a friend or less, if she ends up being the one that kills him, she couldn’t even begin to imagine how she’d feel. Or even, by that point, would she have lost her own soul by then? Would she fully resort to serving mindlessly to souls of bitching morons who had died thousands years ago? 

The intense fear she experienced the second she regained her mind kept her attacking at the ice. She scraped into it either claws and her tentacles trying to dig through the ice. Maybe if she did lose it, she wouldn’t have to face the consequences of her actions. How could she? Murdering was one thing and murdering a friend… was a whole other. She struck at the ice cage with everything she had until her movements physically slowed with exhaust. Her body wavered in the air for a moment before she let herself collaps to the floor. 

She lay idle for a moment. What was she to do? There was no way she’d just let herself lose her mind to these fucking imbeciles living in her mind, but what is there that she can do? What was she supposed to do to get rid of them? She could give so many things to return to the time where it was just her in her head. 

“Gods…” Den curled up, her tentacles wrapping her into a cocoon. The noises she makes are almost intelligible, a blend of sobbing laughter. Chilly glanced at her from where she stood, and for a moment Den thought she saw sympathy in her eyes. Like she understood her problem. She wove her cocoon tighter at the thought. 

Chilly grimaced and let her ice disintegrate away. They had moved Ivan to the restroom as soon as Den was contained. She had been listening to the doctor’s instructions on what ice to remove from his chest. He had concluded that the damage was only punctured flesh and a notched rib. The ice, he said, had helped the wound, and said it was all fine and he’d handle the rest. 

Speaking of which. 

Nothing was fine, for the record. 

Nothing has been fine since Raptor Park. Since she was thrown into the raptor enclosure by them, losing an arm and nearly dying. Since Christian literally died in that volcano eruption, randomly showing back up at their door with relapsed memories, varying second, to third degree burns, a set of demon-like features and nearly burning down the apartment with the embers that drift off from his skin. 

And then with Den absorbing the previous god of chaos. 

Ever since Chilly awakened godhood, vague cosmic knowledge bubbles at the back of her head. Though, they were things she could barely grasp, let alone making any sense of it. For some reason, as her third eye opened subconsciously, she had a hunch that she would be able to understand what Den’s going though. She looked at Christian. 

He seems to sense it. He seems to sense everything, actually. He met her gaze, and when Chilly stayed silent, he simply motioned at Den and pointed at his neck. Chilly nodded. 

Christian then turned. His tail glided softly through the air and swung behind him as he made his way back towards the couch. He picked up the TV remote and began rewinding the movie. Chilly rested her eyes on the flakes of ash gathered at where he last stood, and wiped them off with her socks before she walked to join Den on the floor. She got down and curled up next to her, shifting parts of her body from human to raptor to lay comfortably, and rested her eyes. 

If she really did understand Den’s problem, or rather, she thought, it was more like an issue with all gods her type, then they would really need Dr. Ake’s help. 

[cerastes]

So finally got around to watching the Ultrakill VOD, and I have to say, I was not expecting it to end with you fucking W+M1ing V2. I don't think I've ever been this simultaneously impressed and angry. Well done.

For what it's worth, and I don't know if this is something you've already had conversations about or thought about, but, I suspect part of the problem you were having was how consistently you were staying away from V2, and thus not being in range to heal. Between you moving around trying to avoid damage and V2 doing... well, the exact same thing, it's definitely pretty easy to wind up having that happen.

Right up until you went "fuck it" and ran in to start beating the shit out of that red fucker, anyway.

EHEHE NO ONE LIKED THAT ❤️ I hope the VOD was fun.

I think you’re right! Let me explain my logic for going in like that on V2: He was majorly chipping me out with shotgun pellets most of the time, and I was too far to heal. V2 also has that distance based enrage, so my first thought was “oh it enrages him because it puts him at a disadvantage for too long”, but when that clearly wasn’t working, the follow up thought was “Oh, I’m going about it wrong, the game is trying to tell me that staying far away is bad, and is punishing me for it, because I’ll get no healing, I have to go IN so I can damage and heal, I’ll look for the sound cues in order to know when to dash, and if I get hit, it’ll never be a OHKO so I can heal it out.”

So I started moving directly at V2 dashing whenever I heard a cue for an attack, and initially, I did plan to use the shotty and the nail gun, but… The revolver was just working out so well that I thought “man it’ll be probably be hilarious if I just only use the revolver” so I committed to the bit. I played it like a Dark Souls boss, basically.

In hindsight, it makes a lot of sense and I think V2 is well designed: NONE of my losses against V2 felt unfair or like I was cheated, and his enrage only really kicks in if you stay FAR away for a while, meaning you are only dealing damage with revolver potshots, MEANING you are laming it out and going against the game philosophy of being hyper aggressive and up close with enemies. Kinda like how Sekiro will punish you for, funnily enough for this context, playing it like Dark Souls.

[jimimn]

Oh I'm sorry you had to go through that :( And I'm happy you were able to find something (or in this case someone) to be there for you ❤️❤️

OH I need to do that too!! Immediately googling how to add songs to Spotify 🧐

LMAOO yes I had the same thoughts cause set me free also had cursing and I was like ight how they gonna broadcast it on music shows but they are doing it, so? 😂 Maybe they bleeped the words, there aren't many after all 🤷‍♀️ Or they were also like Park Jimin can curse on a music show as a treat 😂

Oh oh oh and can we talk about the like crazy dance because????? I'm obsessed. His dancers were so BEAUTIFUL both the hybe and the late night show dancers. AND the way I saw people trying to say the woman in the mv wasn't representing him and fighting tooth and nail to prove that just for Jimin to have this dance LMAO he really said sike. Love that for him. I'm so in love with his dance between the male and female dancers and how he switches between them and how they pull and push him and and and IT'S JUST SO GOOD. My favorite is when the girls pull him towards them and then circle him and the first girl just kind of grips his chin (not really but the hand motion is similar to that) and turns it?? Idk why but I'm obsessed with that move. She really said bitch look at me, embrace yourself.

Also am I the only one who's kind of side eyeing everyone on twitter right now? Because everyone is saying "karmy we're exaggerating the dance wasn't even that sensual" and I'm like?? They didn't exaggerate though 😭 at least the translations I saw weren't like that.. Karmy did say the dancers touch him (chin, bicep, thigh etc) which they did, and that Jimin kind of warned them it would happen, but I don't think they exaggerated? Like they just told us what will happen. Or maybe I just didn't see those tweets lmao 😭 Idek why I'm bothered by this 😭 -🦋

thank you! 🥺 oh and the Spotify thing is really easy btw you just have to go to settings and switch on the local files option. then download the song and under your library on spotify, a playlist named "local files" will show up and you'll be able to see the song there. and then just normally like we do with songs, add the downloaded song on your normal playlists!!! it's a life saver 😭 i couldn't imagine going to YouTube every time i wanted to listen to letter 😭

LMFAO I think maybe jimin just won't sing the "fuck" during smf like hobi didn't on mama during arson. BUT!!! they should be allowed idc 😌

YESSSSSS please I'm obsessed with the like crazy choreo lord knows how many times I've watched both the Fallon performance and the dance practice video lmfao 😭😭😭 they did such a good job!!! whoever choreographed like crazy pls take a bow. BTS choreographies literally never disappoint they're just so good. And please, I've seen too many people invalidate the queer themes associated with like crazy. Like pls stop jimin just embarrassed you with the choreography. whoever denies it is just dumb atp like the woman is CLEARLY his reflection lmao 😭 I also saw homophobic armys attacking queer armys for saying that they related to the song like bffr art is subjective everyone has different stories and how they relate to the art they consume is none of your business 💀 AND OH YES THAT PART YOU MENTIONED PLS MY JAW DROPPED 😭😭😭 the entire choreo is just art i love it so much i can't fckin wait to watch more performances.

hmm about that i think it was a little bit of an overreaction though 😭 from what i saw. and i think it wasn't just because of karmys though it collectively blew up bc of engagement from both sides. I'm majorly side eyeing the people who are overcompensating saying things like "forget him i want her" just trying to prove a point which does not need to be proved like I'm sorry but you're coming off as equally obsessive as the people who are saying they are jealous lmao. like can we please be normal about this ffs 😭 but anyway. yeah. jimin keeps slaying that's what i care about 💅

[milfweirdal]

Weird Al 30 Day Challenge - Day 1

(finally getting round to doing this)

Day 1: how did you first get into weird al? what was the first song you heard?

so i was introduced to weird al by my dad when i was a kid, not majorly, just a few of his songs. eat it, fat, like a surgeon, and amish paradise, to be specific. me and my brother jammed out to him in a casual way when we were younger but then i mostly forgot about him for a long time

then last year someone i follow reblogged that germs gifset (you know the one) and the rest is history ^_^ like the thought process was verbatim "oh shit weird al i forgot about him thats so cool that he's on my dash" "he did a nine inch nails style parody??? thats fucking awesome i gotta hear this immediately [having become a nin fan since growing up]" "wait a damn minute, why is he actually so gender???" like after that i had no chance of avoiding plunging headlong into a hyperfixation with him and his work. the "wait a minute, why is he hot too???" came a few days after that and was also inevitable, i feel. i tried to fight it, but to no avail. now here i am, a Close Personal Friend of Al, and also a fully realised Yankochick, no ragrets.

(link to challenge)

[didhewinkback]

oh my gosh wait i love your interpretation of the lyric! i had never thought about it in that context before but it makes so much sense!! this is why i love talking to people about lyrics and songs !!! yay i’m so happy i messaged you and got your thoughts on it! i think, like you said, when i listen to falling what majorly stands out to me is his self-hatred so much so that that becomes the focus of the song and all the reasons as to why he got to that point kinda fade into the background. maybe that’s bc i’ve been mentally in a place like that before (not bc i’ve cheated but just a like damn i’m not happy w where i’m at rn) so i specifically latch onto the chorus of the song? i love that we’re all so drawn to different lyrics within the same song!

but like back to your interpretation — it makes perfect sense bc i think what really confused me is that if him cheating was what ended the relationship then why is it only talked about within this one lyric (two words!!! like you said) and never touched on again?? like for an album that is alllll about this breakup you’d think he’d talk about it more?? it just didn’t make sense to me. but if the cheating occurred during a break/pause in the relationship and destroys any chance of reconciliation it makes total sense that he would then spiral over being the one to really put a nail in the coffin of this breakup. like yeah there are a number of things we both did that led to this break (he even mentions a few of them in other songs) but YOU hooking up with someone else made this relationship irredeemable. that is just so devastating….and it doesn’t even touch on being the other person in all of this which just adds a whole other layer like you mentioned! “there is such a casualness to it” is the perfect way to sum this lyric up holy shit yes exactly! which then could also lead into the lyric from fine line of “put a price on emotion, i’m looking for something to buy” & him getting to this point of being so devoid of any emotion but i could literally talk about that lyric for daysssss bc it’s always fucked me up. for now i’m going to go listen to falling again and rethink everything lol

yes yes exactly ! there are layersssssss here and yeah the casualness of it is what always struck me. that song is such a good interpretation of an absolute self hatred spiral ugh i love that album

[boyswillbedogz]

ALR SO id say we function a lot like roommates???

more under cut because BOY i talk a lot

theres definitely things that some of us do that others resent (socks spends all our money on bad deals for mountain dew & video games, autopsy lashes put on our friends, myke refuses to feed the body when hes fronting).

usually the problems are minor or at least solvable and can be caught by mys, unname, mori, or i (designated responsible headmates) before any actual damage is done, but its still annoying, and we dont love getting in trouble for things the others did.

we dont actually have a lot of direct communication unless someones in cofront? we write down stuff like homework & important dates for things like drama performances, but day to day events are tedious to journal so we usually dont bother. its not actually great tho bc we tend to forget a lot of things (people, favors asked of us, events, etc).

choices usually are just made by whoevers fronting, ngl. we had to change our schedhule a while back because someone picked a class the rest of us wouldve hated.

its super ineffective and we have zero rzn to function like this but journaling is a chore & usually amnesia barriers will give us just enough collective memories not to like. die. but we're kind of dysfunctional in the day to day whsjdj-

we'll occassionally do stuff to spite each other but nothing that would majorly effect our lives. usually just, like, painting the body's nails a color the others dont like.

as for, like, interpersonal relationships we're still basically roommates. there's no major relationship strain but there's some mild resentment about our own existence as a system, though it mostly goes to the abusers who made us this way.

mystic is kinda the boss since hes our main gatekeeper. he's not very present he just kinda keeps us from majorly fucking up our life, does a little organizational stuff every once in a bit, & controls who gets what memories and occassionally controls who fronts. he can force dormancy but he usually doesnt do that unless someone like. tries to kill the body or something else major.

theres definitely other responsible ones and soothers, plus unname and ari who do a lot of cleaning and homework for us. we're generally appreciative but theyre not around enough to form real bonds :( theres also ones like cypher and myke who are just kinda there and its weird but we're fond of them in a weird way so it works. theres also autopsy, pesticide, martyr & manic who are somewhat destructive and we resent them for their actions sometimes but also like. we get it & just try to minimize that effect, and at the end of the day we get on fine, if by necessity than nothing else. theres also trauma holders & symptom holders who we kind of pity and a pawful of littles that we try to parent and give them as functional an environment as we can.

so yeah. roommates. we kinda get along by necessity than anything else and the way we, like, function is really innefective and janky but we're all tired and its the best weve got lol-

btw we're all totally cool to answer questions about source & how our system works and i <3 talking about it bc nobody else knows shdjfjhrgh

[imdoingaokay]

This is a funny idea to me, could you do the male companions seeing male sole shift uncomfortably before saying "oh I forgot to put my dick on.... What? Did I forget to tell you I'm trans?"

I want to give everyone a quick disclaimer: I AM NOT TRANS. So if I've fucked up how to represent trans people, tell me! I want this to be accurate.

Also, I had to look up what this ask was talking about, super cool btw.

Danse

He’s confused. Like, am majorly confused… He could’ve sworn…

He has always seen you as a man, you are a man, and you will always be a man.

But… the dick? Do you have an attachable dick? What?

You need to explain it to him a little, break it down a bit. He knows what it means to be trans, but I don’t think he nailed down what dysphoria is. He’ll understand, I promise.

Deacon

Okay, listen-

This man probably has one stashed at HQ.

“You act like you’re the only trans dude in the world, Sole.” He says if you don’t believe him.

And… I mean… he does have one…

Wash it first though, the only reason they had it before was for a mission… and it got bloody… nobody will elaborate why.

Gage

“Why the fuck are you telling me?” He grumbles, before walking ahead of you two. 

If you insist that you have to go get it, he complains the whole time. Saying “it’s not my fault you forgot your body parts” or something like that.

Aside from that? He doesn’t care, in fact, he doesn’t really wanna know. 

“What goes on in your pants is your business, not mine.”

Hancock

He has one. For… research purposes. 

Actually, he thought it was a sex toy for the longest time and just kept it because “teeheehee, look it’s a penis!”

If you want it, he’ll give it to you, but he doesn’t care all that much. It’s off his hands at least.

MacCready

“Ew” He says at first, before realizing what he said.

He really means “ew, why does your dick come off? And why do you need to reattach it?”

Like Danse, you need to explain that to him, because he just thinks you’re a dude with a working weiner that can just pop off when you want. 

Nick Valentine

“D…Do you need to get it?”

Nick has been around for a while. He’s met trans people and been educated in it too. So when you say you’re trans, he kinda just… shrugs?

Like… he shrugs as if he’s saying “go off bestie, accept your identity.”

But… like… do you need it? Because he’s fine if you turn around, he doesn’t want you uncomfortable.

Old Longfellow

He doesn’t say anything, he’s just really confused.

“I’m getting too old for this shit. How much radiation did you get?”

He thinks that your dick falling off is a mutation. When you say you’re trans, he kinda narrows his eyes before saying “what?”

Teach him what trans means… he needs help understanding.

Preston

“Oh wow! We should probably go get it.” And then he proceeds to lightly jog back to whatever camp you had set up unless you stop him.

This man knows that General is a gender-neutral term, bestie.

So he doesn’t really care. He just thinks you’re the coolest, so you’re set. 

X6-88

He has it.

Straight up.

Like, before you started shifting yourself around, he had it out.

“I noticed you left this, you seem rather fond of it, so I brought it just in case. I can see what its proper purpose is now.” Of course he’s looking away, the man doesn’t like what he’s holding.

He doesn’t care that you’re trans, all that matters is that you’re a good shot.

[aiiwa]

PRETTY IN PINK — IWAIZUMI HAJIME.

✗ REQUEST: may i request a lil text fic of yn having the most juiciest 🍑 and taking pics in her lingerie to send to her female friends so they can help pic out which one is the prettiest but she accidently sends them to her best friend and crush iwa and how that would go?????

— iwaizumi hajime.

⤷ genre: college au - fluff (?) / crack (?)

⤷ warnings: suggestive / mature themes, cursing, and a photo thirst trap photo (?), also iwa talking about masturbating over your photo

⤷ word count: 2.8k

— a/n: for my big booty anon i would sell my soul for 🍑💖

this is set in the same universe as freshman year, so feel free to give it a read if you’d like!!

life after meeting your boys had changed your daily routine in the best way. not a minute went by that wasn’t filled with the familiar craziness you had grown on.

free time was spent humouring mattsun by shifting the couches in their apartment around and engaging in a wrestling match, originally stemming from a fight the two of you had over the last slice of cake a month ago; the current score was an even tie of 14-14 though you had plans to take the lead. when it came to makki, he was more than happy to indulge on your self-care days; he’d even take part in your skincare routine, let you paint his nails, and liked it when you made smoothies to sip on while the two of you waited for your clay masks to dry. every other week was dedicated to retouching his roots with pink hair dye.

other days, you were set up on your bed; under the soft covers, stash of snacks next to you, while your laptop rested on your lap. and at exactly three a.m. you would receive an incoming call from, oikawa. since it would be three p.m. in argentina, he’d take to sitting out on his balcony, basking in the sun and interrogating you on the relationship, or lack thereof, you had with his dear iwa-chan.

speaking of sweet, gorgeous iwa - in your biased and majorly crushing opinion, hanging out with him was your favourite. though you’d never be heard saying that around anyone. just last week he’d all but solidified your love for him even more, when the two of you were up late, binge watching a new sci-fi show that caught iwa’s attention, and he got up to make you some coffee when you started to feel sleepy.

“here we go, coffee with two sugars for the pretty lady.” the warmth you felt run over your body settled before you grabbed at the steaming cup. taking a sip you realised you’d never told iwa how many sugars you preferred, and after asking him, you watched his faint blush bloom under the harsh light of the t.v. screen. “heh, i don’t know...just noticed it, i guess.”

but as much as you loved the guys, there were just some things you couldn’t do with them. things that required a strictly girls-only day out.

“what do you mean we’re not allowed to come? i wanna go to the mall too!” mattsun whines, tugging at the sleeve of your cropped, button-up sweater, while you were bent over tying your laces.

“it’s a girl’s day out, emphasis on girl.” smacking his hand away, you straighten up; sending him the look your mother gives you when you’re being difficult. “so unless your little pee-pee grew into a powerful vagina, you’ll be staying home.”

“but makki’s practically a girl too!” the couch cushion that flew into his face was true to its aim, the swift whack shutting mattsun up.

“fuck off, little dick.” makki grumbled, lanky figure draped over the couch; sans aforementioned couch cushion that was covering his face before. mattsun tried to throw the pillow back at the pink-haired boy, but it was caught with ease. “we agreed to never bring that up again.”

“yeah well, y/n’s talking about some girl-time shit, like we didn’t take her to a strip club, filled with male strippers.” mattsun sasses back, crossing his arms with a smirk. “like makki didn’t get a lap dance from that guy-”

from the corner of your eye, the bulky figure entering the room catches your attention instantly. you could never get tired of eyeing up the way his shirt stretched around his fit body, how his sleeves cut a bit into his arms and knowing he could rip them up with a flex of his biceps. watching him walk up to you, the tightening of his navy blue gym shorts around his shaped thighs, had you mesmerised; dragging your gaze across the outline of his bulge, you swore it twitched just before he stopped near you.

“ready to go, y/n?” he offered a small smile, twirling his keys around his finger. at the sound of his voice, the other two boys halted their bickering over the strip club incident.

“oi iwa, no fair, are you going with y/n?!” mattsun interrogates, thick brows arched in question.

“i’m dropping her off.”

“oh.” makki chimes in. “out of everyone i thought you would be the one with the most complaints, iwa. just the other day when the two of you were together, i wanted to ask y/n for help with my project but you-”

“yeah, yeah that was the other day.” iwa cuts him off, and you couldn’t help but furrow your brows, wanting to know what makki was going to say. oh well, you’ll just get it out of him after. “c’mon y/n, you’ll be late meeting the girls.”

iwa was on his way to the front door when makki asked you what was so different about this trip to the mall that you didn’t want any of the boys to come along.

“i’m going to buy new lingerie, and i need their opinions.” you shrugged, grabbing your hand bag so you could follow iwa out.

busy with shoving your phone into your purse, and checking you had all of your essentials, you failed to notice the scheming look shared between mattsun and makki. or how iwa stood frozen by the door, hand tightly gripping the handle, until you bumped into his warm back.

“lingerie...hm, i wonder for who?”

at makki’s words you felt heat rise up in your face, as you rubbed at your nose.

“y/n~! you could’ve just asked me to come along! i would love to give my opinion!”

you’d never seen keys flying so fast through the air, finding their mark on mattsun’s forehead.

after spending twenty minutes pressing an ice pack to the growing bump on mattsun’s forehead, and listening to him trying to explain to an irritated iwa that he was just playing around; you’d finally left the apartment, and was nearing the bustling shopping district. iwa had been quiet, though not awkward, with only the mellow songs of his playlist, named after you, playing during the short drive. he flicked his indicator on, spotting the two girls waving at you from the sidewalk, and pulled over to the side.

“thanks for the ride, iwa.” you mumbled distractedly, admiring the veins in his tanned arm as he shifted the gear into park.

“anything for my pretty lady.” iwa lifts the corner of his mouth up into a sweet grin, olive green eyes flitting over you next to him. he doesn’t even realise he’d called you his pretty lady, and you press a hand to your heated cheek; ignoring your friends cooing and pointing at the two of you. “do you need some money? are you gonna be warm?” he leans closer to you, putting his arm behind your seat as he searches through his gym back in the back. the intoxicating smell of his cinnamon cologne invades your senses. “i’ll give you my jacket, just let me find it.”

you couldn’t help but chuckle at his antics, grabbing his bicep to stop him, giving it a firm, very self-indulgent squeeze. “iwa.” you called out to him. he turned to look at you, wide eyed and so fucking adorable. “you’re acting like my mom.” 

his handsome features relaxed as he released an airy laugh. “well i love your mom, so i’m fine with that.” he pulled his arm from behind you, jacket in his grip, though not in a way to make you let go of his arm.

“i still can’t believe she messages you to make sure i’m eating right.” you groaned, still squeezing his arm playfully. “and stop trying to give me money, it’s like you want to be my sugar daddy or something.”

iwa’s arm tenses under your touch as he processes your words. “alright, time for you to go.” you manage to catch the bright blush dusting his cheeks; your hand reaching out to pinch them yet all you feel is the material of his jacket as he shoves it into your arms. “get out, your friends are waiting for you.”

you pout at his dismissal; but with the way he was so flustered, scratching the back of his neck and hiding his pretty eyes, you decide to let him off easy 

“‘kay, fine~” you drawled in a sing-song voice.

making a show of collecting your things together, you dramatically tugged your seat belt loose; reaching for the door but halting in your actions when the weight of his large hand, dropped on top of your head. allowing him to angle your head to face him, he gifted you with a soft smile that had you ready to melt into the passenger seat. 

“be safe, alright?” your eyes blinked with each gentle pat on your head - once, twice, thrice - most likely ruffling your hair you’d spent a good amount of time on. “now go, text me and i’ll pick you up later.”

puffing your cheeks, you nodded as he squeezed your scalp affectionately. unlocking the door, you stepped outside into the cool air, wrapping iwa’s big jacket over your shoulders as goosebumps rose underneath the thin material of your sweater. bumping the door closed with your hip, you bent at the waist and stuck your head through the open window 

“bye, iwa.” your lips pressed together in a shy smile.

he mirrored your smile. “see you later, pretty lady.”

walking away, tugging the collar of his jacket closer, you could feel his eyes following after you. only half-listening as the girls teased you, hooking their arms through yours to walk through the entrance of the mall; you glanced back once more to see iwa stick a hand out and wave, before driving off once you disappeared from his view.

steam whirled up and around iwa, as a contented sigh escaped his parted lips. stood underneath the spray of warm water, he felt the tension begin to evaporate from his taut muscles 

iwa’s gym sessions, as of late, had been rather extreme. well, it had been this way for a couple of months now, ever since he had met you. he had to overwork his body, send it into overdrive and power through the fatigue - it was the only way to release some of his pent up frustration. the frustration that came with crushing on you, and not acting on it.

you were so fucking gorgeous to him, and you were so damn sweet. every part of his being was steadily entangling itself around your presence, and he had no idea how to stop it. not that he would even want to try. when you were nearby, his ears would begin to twitch at the sound of your voice, searching for you; and when you touched him, wrapping your delicate fingers around his arm to steady yourself, or poking your fingers at his back absentmindedly while teasing his roommates, he could feel his skin tingle all over. but it was when you would look up at him, sparkles in your beautiful eyes, that iwa knew he was a goner.

you had him wrapped around your pretty little finger, and he just wanted to make you his. have you in his arms…and bury himself so deep inside you-

“fuck.”

he shut off the shower with a bit more force than necessary. this was exactly the reason why he’d been visiting the gym more, working out for longer, because his mind was plagued with thoughts of you under him.

especially after seeing you in your cute outfit today. he feared that you’d catch his eyes lingering too long on the exposed skin of your tummy, or trying to memorise the curve of your lush thighs in those jeans. hell, he could barely say anything to you on the drive to the mall, tongue running dry with you so close to him.

with a huff, he carefully stepped out of the shower; wrapping his fully white towel around his hips, and moving into his room. kicking the door closed behind him, he made his way towards his side table just in time for his phone to go off.

grabbing the device and waiting a second for the facial recognition to process; he was surprised to see it was an instagram notification from you. expecting another food porn post, he was dead wrong; with absolutely nothing that could’ve prepared him for what greeted his eyes.

“holy,” he collapsed onto his bed, holding his phone to his face. “fuck.”

you...you-

“fuck!” he growled out.

you’d sent him a photo in your new lingerie, albeit it was most likely by accident, but there you were modelling your new all-pink set. the one he had 'chosen’.

with your arms raised above your head, brushing your hair over your shoulders, the stretched out pose accentuated the curve of your breasts, almost spilling out from the strapped confines of your bra. could he even call it that? it was all studded belt straps and buckles, that matched the thick choker-collar around your lithe neck, and it was not helping his current situation. grazing his eyes lower, a thin belt was clipped around your waist, before a sliver of skin lead downwards to the skinny, almost sheer, material of your panties. it was high waisted, dipping behind your wide hips and the teasing curve of your ass. and then your thighs, fuck how he wanted his face to be squeezed between them. thigh-high stockings dug into your plush thighs, squished out from the way you were sitting on your rug.

leaning back onto his bed, iwa was tempted to check if his heart was still beating, if he was even breathing at this point. but he did check, and he was alive; and the blood circulating his body was currently flowing straight to his groin.

the sight of you, so fucking pretty in pink, was burned into his mind forever.

under his palms the prickling sensation spread across his fingers, itching to relieve himself. one hand trailed across the panes of his abdomen, while the other grabbed at his phone; though it almost went flying out of his hand when it started vibrating and your contact photo flashed on his screen.

“shit.” he cursed, clearing his throat and trying to even out his breathing. he accepted the call after a moment. “hello?”

“iwa?!” at the sound of your voice he could feel his dick twitch, and he clenched his teeth together; annoyed at himself. he needed to get a grip. “oh my god, iwa, i am so sorry!”

‘no, i’m sorry that i want to fuck you so bad right now.’ is what he wants to say. “it’s...fine, y/n.” is what he manages to get out.

he hears you chuckle a bit awkwardly on the other end of the line. “shit, i’m so embarrassed right now.” you confess. “i meant to send that to the girls…”

“you don’t have to be embarrassed.” if anyone was to embarrassed it was him. he’d spent months pining after you, and now here he was lying on his bed aching to touch himself to you, towel fisted in his free hand. “you’re beautiful, y/n.” at least that managed to come out right.

“thank you, iwa...i only realised what happened when i was about to send another showing the back!” you laughing at your antics fell deaf on his ears, when the thought of your ass seized control of his mind.

how often had he admired the shape of you the past few months. daydreaming of the way you’d feel in his big hands, silky skin dug into by his long fingers, cheeks jutting out between them. he wanted to hold your ass in the palms of his hands, squeeze and tease you...his hips buck up, grinding against the cotton of the towel and a loud groan escapes his mouth.

“oh- iwa? are you okay?” you asked him, so innocently. he couldn’t take it anymore.

“i’m good...i just- something’s come up,” he hissed out, glancing down at the red tip of his cock peeping up at him. “i’ll call you later.”

“oh, of course! sorry again iwa, hehe, i’ll delete the photo. talk soon!”

his eyes shut at the sound of your giggle, free hand already rubbing himself. “bye.”

ending the call and moving the phone away from his face, he stared at the photo again, thumb hovering over the ‘save’ option, before pressing yes. he’d keep it locked away just for him, a treasured piece of you in his gallery. starting to stroke himself to your perfect body, he waited for the notification that you had deleted the photo from the conversation.

but it never came, though he did, and the photo remained buried under new food posts sent from you.

yet it wasn’t til a few weeks after that iwa began to think that maybe, just maybe, it wasn’t as much of an accident as you made it out to be.

© 2020 AIIWA. please do not copy, modify or repost my work.

[yourstormthlaylirahh]

Reveal your watch and to watch drama list!

No one tagged me in this and I’m late to the trend or whatever, but I enjoy talking to myself on tumblr dot com so I am going to do it.

Currently Watching:

Vice Versa - It was so good! I had so much fun watching it, and it kept me on my toes so far and nothing went quite how I expected it to. I adore Jimmy to pieces and I am excited to have him play a role I won’t starting hating partway through (cough Wai cough cough). That being said thus far him and Sea are overshadowed by my excitement to see Ohm and Nanon acting together again, and I am already extremely attached to their characters. They are just really fun to watch onscreen together. And Lay is adorable, I love him and wish him nothing but the best already. Also Forcebook!!!!!

Sky in Your Heart - I want it to be better than it is. I don’t dislike it per se, but it isn’t leaving a lasting impression for the most part - and that is saying something as I am quite easy to please. The last episode was really good though, so I am hopeful the finale will deliver.

Mama Gogo - This show is just fun, and I love seeing Earth get to play a different role than usual. Toptap is excellent, though I have a bit of a bias and really the whole cast is doing a great job.

Senpai This Can’t Be Love! - Japan continues to produce excellent content. I love how caring of each others feelings the leads are, and the humour is excellent, as per usual with Japan.

My Secret Love - I look forward to this show every week. I wouldn’t say it is good all the time, sometimes the tropes they lean into are irritating and the chancellor can fuck right off, but when the show nails the assignment it really delivers. I am enjoying all 3 main couples, and love how they have very different relationships and struggles. It is easy for shows with this many couples to feel redundant but My Secret Love never does. The less said about Tim the better though. I really dislike him. I am liking Mek more as the series goes on, but he still fucks up majorly every episode. Why was your apology to Tim so insincere when given to Tim himself and not to Kim?  Also the sisters should be a GL couple just saying.

Love Mechanics - It is messy and dramatic and oh so entertaining. I really root for MarkVee despite everything, in no small part thanks to spectacular jobs by both actors.

Want to See You - The episodes have been getting better recently, and it was never bad, just more soap opera than I am accustomed to. Thach and Phuc are really sweet together now that they are actually communicating. I’m not sold on how hard they have angled Nu into a villain - it seems she is competing with Namning and  Amy (La Cuisine and What Zabb Man) for ‘most ridiculously over the top cardboard spurned lover’ villain ever.

Cafe Minamdang - I am behind on this. I started it to fill the From Now on Showtime shaped hole in my heart, and it is doing it’s job, even though I don’t think it is quite as good.

Alchemy of Souls - Fun, indulgent little fantasy drama where my second lead syndrome is luckily mostly offset by my multishipping tendency.

Even Sun - The premise and cast could have made this very good, but it is just ok due to a dud of a script. The actors do their best and manage to somewhat salvage it, but we are halfway through the the two mains have had the same conversation with almost no variation each episode.

Extraordinary Attorney Woo - I love this! I adore her and she is so relatable, and even though our autism presents in some drastically different ways she makes me feel so seen.

46 Days - I still have to finish the last couple episodes of this. Pure crack and I cackle every episode. Though every time I watch I am struck by how much I would love Mild and Baifern to play a couple sometime, they play off each other really well.

Kanakana - I am having some trouble tracking down subbed eps which is frustrating. But this is one of my favourite dramas this year. It is so sweet, and I love the main character so much. I am also a sucker for tropes about misunderstood characters who look scary but are softies, so this gives me everything I want. It also gives me Yotsuba vibes.

I also just finished Kinnporsche, Triage, Kimi no Koto Dake Mite Itai, and TMS2. I enjoyed all of them, though the writing of Kinnporsche fell apart halfway through and the writing team made some highly questionable decisions, especially in the finale. I think they tried to do to much at once and ended up being satisfying with very little of it. Triage is so far not only the best show of 2022 so far, but one of my favourite shows ever. It was well plotted, with excellent gradual character reveals/development. I cannot recommend it highly enough. Kimi no Koto... was excellent, such a sweet coming of age story, albeit short. I liked TMS2 a lot, I waited till it was finished airing and binged it which helped with the pain. I also think I’m going to drop Check Out and just treat Ep 0 as a spin off, because I loved the pilot episode and the show is just... not good.

I do plan to start Colour Rush 2, Mystic Pop Up Bar, & Oh My Sunshine Night when I have time.

Rewatching:

I’m not really rewatching anything myself at the moment, but I am rewatching Bad Buddy with my cousin and I am going to start Triage with her soon, and then probably Not Me. And I convinced mom to watch ATOTS with me so that will be fun.

Looking Forward To:

Too many to list! But I am most excited for Moonlight Chicken, Art Adore En, The Uncanny Counter 2,  Never Let Me Go, The Eclipse, Gap, My Only 12%, Home School, She is Still Cute Today, Girlfriend Project Day 1, Cheese Sister, War of Y, and Six Characters

Also shout out to MOD2/Transplant, since that seems to be happening and I couldn’t be more thrilled. Sammon adaptation supremacy!

[omegawolverine]

Plesse tell me about queerness in the get down!!

okay okay queerness in the get down let's fuckn goooo

disclaimer: I havent watched this show in full for like 5 months at least, probably gonna get something wrong and/or forget some more important bits. also this wasnt proof read I just word vomited

tws: period typical homophobia, abuse mention, f slur use, bury your gays trope, overdose mention, mention of a creepy possible age gap (the age gap hasnt been confirmed so that's why its possible), cops

going from least to most prominent queer characters, let's start with mylene cruz!

so, from the beginning of this show she has an established romantic relationship with ezekiel (although the status of their actual relationship changes frequently throughout the show) and though this was a relationship she was hesitant to pursue, it is clear that she does have romantic feelings for him and if not for them both having growing careers in very different music genres (zeke specifically working in a genre that she repeatedly labels as bad because she thinks they're ruining records + that it isnt real music because they're using someone elses piece and rapping over it, that's not really important here tho lol) they probably wouldve had a much healthier, smooth sailing romance. that being said theres a few things that happen in the show that, while not explicitly clear, or even really good coding at that—to the point where you wont catch if you really arent looking for it (and trust me, I always look for coding, hers was just so little that it flew over my head until I saw someone else mention it)—are still cool to think about!

so, for starters, I wanna mention the toy box performance, which was performed by mylene and regina, who are best friends. that's all cool and shit, and you dont really think much about it...until you hear about the fact that the show runners purposely colored a lot of the scenes in that performance with the bi colors. like. the writers after the show ended basically said "oh yeah there was plans to make her coding more explicit, but our shit got cancelled soooo" and then dropped the fact that she was gonna be bi (or at least implies bi) in the series, which puts a new twist on a few things.

now, besides the bi coloring in the background of the toy box performance (which was mostly on scenes with her and regina, which involved a lot of uh,, lowkey lewd dancing. with each other. in very revealing outfits. wooooo), there's her music! I dont tend to read too much into this one bc, like I said before, her coding is fucking light and the writers themselves said they didnt really get to do much with it, but I think some stuff with her music is interesting. specifically how her, yolanda and regina's song set me free blew up because dizzee, resident (lowkey enby coded) bicon, got their song played in a queer club. also that the song was majorly important to dizzee and started playing literally right as he kissed a boy for the first time and realized "oh shit I like boys that's bonkers". also that the song can be taken in a gay way since literally the entire thing is about becoming your true self, fully and unapologetically, which is what both dizzee and mylene's entire character arcs are about. dizzee (and a lot of other queer people, apparently), heard this song about being set free and it resonated with them so much that they got that shit most of its popularity.

speaking of dizzee and mylene, they parallel each other a lot in the way that their arcs are about them realizing who they are, coming into themselves and no longer just letting people treat them like shit in a sense (dizzee starting to tell people essentially that they can call him weird all they want, they can make fun of how he acts, what he likes, how he dresses, etc. but he likes how he is and quite literally saying "it's okay to be an alien" as he has consistently compared himself to one throughout the show vs mylene learning that if she wants to be a disco singer she needs to put her foot down, not let anyone, not even the love of her life, not even her abusive father, stop her from achieving her dreams, etc. and continuing to pursue her career with or without their support). one more little parallel that I think is interesting is during I think s2 towards the end of the show is when dizzee and thor are shown together having fun with each other, painting all over the building and each other and are basically just being happy and in love together and then they have these clips of them being interspersed with clips of mylene at a party where she is starting to realize that if she wants to get anywhere she needs to be her own main priority and that she needs to put her career and her dream, which is what makes her the happiest, above all else if she wants to succeed. idk I just think how the show made these two into a weird parallel, accidental or not, is neat. maybe not an explicitly queer parallel, but I think at least how her music and whatnot helped dizzee, the main queer character in this show, blossom, is important.

moving on we got shaolin fantastic also known as "oh no your internalized homophobia is showing-"

so, heres a quick list of...interesting shao facts:

Consistently referred to as fag/faggot (shaolin fanfaggot is my personal favorite); he gets really defensive about this despite nobody actually thinking he's queer, it's just people being assholes to be assholes, and he is the only character consistently referred to using a slur, especially a homophobic one, especially for a "straight" character. dizzee, a canonically queer character, is called a fag less than shaolin is even though dizzee actively goes to gay clubs, has a not so secret dude he "hangs out with" and wont let anyone properly meet, paints his nails, wears less than straight clothes even by the 70s standards and is just all around the definition of fucking queer (and I mean like in the weird way, not the gay way). in fact theres only like once I can remember him being called a fag and it had nothing to do with him actually being gay it was literally just like thrown out there the same way you would call someone a bitch.

Has only shown sexual interest in women, yet refuses to have deeper relationships with women in general (possibly because of trauma but who knows) but takes his relationships with his "brothers", specifically zeke, very seriously

Tells zeke and zeke ONLY his real name when zeke was planning to stop being his friend bc shao more or less got boo boo, a like 14 year old black kid, arrested for selling hard drugs; he was clearly scared and trying to do anything to keep zeke around, literally chasing him down the street and hounding him until he got zeke to stop and argue with him

Kept threatening to beat up zeke in the end but couldn't actually bring himself to do so, instead saying that zeke is "fucking lucky" before walking away

Let's zeke get away with things that nobody else can, in general just has a weird soft spot for ezekiel that he shows with nobody else

when shao found dizzee with thor in a vaguely compromising situation (like they were just shirtless covered in paint sleeping next to each other but shao had also seen everything they painted on the walls ((which some of it was sus)), it was clear they had painted on each others bodies and dizzee had been routinely disappearing with this guy for weeks now yet not producing nearly as much art, at least, as far as we audience members know) he didnt judge him but instead, waited for him to get cleaned up and then told him something along the lines of "theres a reason why im so secretive blah blah blah [not everyone needs to know everything about me]", which, in context, kinda implies that he might be a lil. a lil homiesexual. jus a lil.

whenever even the possibility of zeke leaving him comes up he absolutely loses it. he has literally cost ezekiel life changing opportunities because he thought zeke would just up and leave him for them. this could be abandonment issues bc he's a severely traumatized character, and that probably does contribute to it, but it also is just not a reaction he has to any of their other friends just randomly dipping in and out of his life soooooo

generally speaking, this mfer has got either bisexual with a big hard on for zeke coding or homosexual with terrible internalized homophobia and still a hard on for zeke coding. either fucking way, that nigga gay. he gay as hell. gay as fuck man. there wasn't really much to analyze here tbh bc the coding is just so fucking obvious if you look for it or you are/have been a gay person who's dealt with at least a little bit of internalized homophobia.

also, just a sidenote, idk how fucking old shao, but I'm praying hes like at max 19 bc I'm pretty sure zeke is a minor in this show and shao definetly is not so the whole him being heavily implied to have a crush on ezekiel thing is kinda. oof. not oof if zeke is like 17 but any younger than that? OOF.

edit: apparently the characters are only supposed to be a year apart in age but i had no clue about that before writing this post and since shaos age was never actually stated in the show i naturally assumed he was an adult since his actor Looks Like An Adult. this is definetly on me to a certain extent, but i also never saw anything about this when trying to find our their ages so 🤷‍♀️ maybe i just didnt look deep enough, sorry!

now moving on to the main event...marcus dizzee kipling :]

so, first things first, let's talk enby coding bc him being bisexual was already confirmed!

um, to start off, I just wanna say I dont think this enby coding was intentional or even really coding, it's just moreso me being a dizzee kin on main and knowing as a transmasc enby he has very transmasc enby vibes. for example:

cool, gender neutral nickname that everyone calls him

paints nails various different colors

the whole wardrobe is just a transmasc enby heaven...fishnet shirts, jean overalls, jackets and cuffed pants galore, the big colorful pins, etc

gender neutral hairstyle (when I had my fro it was very sexy and made it easy to transition between hyper masc and vaguely fem, which is pog)

comparing himself to/representing himself consistently with an alien character (though this is meant to represent his sexuality, it could also double as a gender thing too, not neccesarily bc of the whole nonbinary alien trope but bc an enby who likes aliens might heavily identify or compare themselves to whatever their idea of an alien is, whether that just be a genderless entity or a motherfucker with fly style and no need to be perceived as anything other Wacky As Hell)

moving on from there, let's talk about how his queerness is presented to us and how, while it may be a really good piece of representation, especially coming from netflix, it still lacks in A Lot of places.

so, let's start with good things!

i personally really like the get down's queer rep with dizzee bc it's (for the most part) nonsexualized and very very soft, about dizzee figuring himself out and realizing there is a place where he fits in, and about two teenagers in the 70s falling in love over their shared passion for street art. it also features an interracial couple where both boys challenge stereotypes both about queer men and men of color, which is epic poggers and very sexy. this piece of rep specifically is very important to me bc I am a queer black person and even tho interracial relationships are mostly normalized now, I've still had people give me shit for primarily dating white people in a town that is...primarily white lol

mm anyways, I can also appreciate how in the get down, dizzee being represented by rumi the alien is not a thing specifically related to gender (as it often is) and instead is about his sexuality and just in general weirdness and how it has led to him being alienated amongst his peers, poc or otherwise. him seeing himself as an alien is not about just his queerness, which is important, it is about him being a queer black man who talks different, acts different, dresses different and is "soft"—he isnt a walking black male stereotype and he wouldnt have been seen as masculine back in the 70s by any stretch of the imagination. this can be relatable to a wide spectrum of queer poc, from queer black men currently who still have to deal with this shit or to people like myself who are afab neurodivergent mixed race enbies that have always been signaled out as weird and alienated for it. dizzee is god rep bc while he has a small part in this show, his parts are very impactful, hard hitting and show queer poc of all ages that they arent alone and that it's okay to "weird", you just need to embrace it because somebody will love you for you, as thor did for dizzee.

that being said theres um. some minor problemas here,,,

namely:

dizzee and thors first kiss

the lack of development this pairing got

the way dizzee was confirmed bisexual off screen, he never said the words himself, just showed interest in both genders

the way dizzee and thor were never even confirmed boyfriends or just fwb so most of the fandom just calls them boyfriends bc Why Not

dizzee was implied fucking DEAD??? AT THE END OF THE SERIES?????? AND THOR WAS IMPLIED ARRESTED?????????????

now, these might have been things that wouldve been fine had the show been given it's full run but it wasnt which is why we are now left with probelms.

so, from the top, let's go over these: dizzee and thor's first (and only "on screen") kiss was one that was shown in a montage of other queer people making over and doing other vaguely romantic/sexual things, one of those things being a whole ass naked titty being mouthed at, but the actual kiss...was just not shown? like they really did just say "yes they kissed <3 you know this from the context clues of it being in a montage with kissing, hickey giving and titty sucking <3 but no we will not show it <3" LIKE HELLO? I SAW A NAKED BOOBIE BUT NOT TWO MEN KISS??? HUH????????

also, dizzee and thor were both fucking high as hell during this bit like this isnt a terrible thing but it's also like sometimes you do shit when you're high that you wouldnt do sober and they just never kissed again on screen so like?? like idk that's not that bad but it does kinda irk me since they deadass got no other on screen intimacy after that unless you including painting on eacher other or sleeping next to each other on a shitty mattress but not touching at all during it bc they were both at opposite ends of the mattress like half way off it

so yeah, that was trash. then we got lack of development, which kinda goes with the "dizzee being a bisexual but he never says it in canon" thing cause like...okay dizzee was already sort of a side character from the get go like he wasnt the mc by any means, but he became way more of a background character as things continued until we basically only saw him for performances or when he was with thor, yet they got no fucking development as a pairing other than "dizzee realize he gay, he like thor, he and thor spend time together and ig probably do some gay stuff but we dont really know bc we only ever see them do graffiti together now" like?? tf am I supposed to do with that shit. answer. quickly. and then theres dizzee not being confirmed bisexual, which is just a running problem with shows literally doing everything to say a character is bi except for having the character just...say they're bi? which would be so easy? like a good way dizzee and thor couldve had some development is by thor teaching dizzee things about the queer community that he didnt even know existed, thor couldve helped him understand what being bi meant and helped him label himself and whatnot but instead we got an off screen confirmation that the writers had bisexual in mind when writing him. which is garbagé.

the whole thor and dizzee never having a confirmed relationship status is also a development problem cause like literally nobody knows if they were just friends who made out, maybe fucked, who knows, or if they were dating bc dizzee does give a love confession but a love confession doesn't mean there is a relationship, especially since thor didn't say he was in love either (as far as I remember, I could be wrong, plus whether or not that really happened or was apart of dizzee literally overdosing during a performance is unclear so 🤪)

and now for the biggest issue...bury your gays trope.

during the season 2 finale, dizzee and thor are chased by cops after they are found doing graffiti, one of the cops is able to catch thor while the other chases dizzee into a train tunnel and there is a train seen headed straight for him before the show cuts to black on a train horn. the show writers claim that if they had gotten another season, dizzee wouldve been alive but since they didnt and since that's essentially super fan trivia knowledge, most people dont fucking know that and instead had to watch a black queer teenager chose death over being fucking arrested by a white cop. on top of that, thor didnt see any of that shit because he was caught and the cop started hauling him off while dizzee was still being chased so thor literally has no clue where his friend/possible boyfriend fucking is or that he's likely dead in a goddamn tunnel all alone, unless you count the fucking pig that chased him in there who wouldve died too. this shows rep was so fucking good as far as most shows go on not having major fucking problems, on not being toxic and over sexualized, etc, etc. and then they just. killed a black queer teenager for no fucking reason. like it was literally the last episode ever, it would add nothing to the plot, it would just devastate fans and devastate it fucking did. I dont cry easy but seeing a character I identified with, who I had hyperfixated on, die because he'd rather that than be arrested is terrible. it fucking sucked.

so yeah. that's my all too extensive thoughts/analysis on the get down's queerness. theres definitely stuff I missed, or misinterpreted, or looked too much into, etc, etc., but this was a fun thing to spend time writing sooo yeah!! thanks for the ask anon, sorry this was just a big rambley info dump, but hopefully you get some enjoyment out of it since it took like 3 hours at least 😭😭 feel free to ask clarifying questions lol

[obeymehasinfluncedmythoughts]

Brothers with Mc Who Has PGAD (Pt 1 of ?)

This is going to be different then my other headcanons. I tried doing them like usual, but it didn't sit well with me. This is only like the first two chapters?? Idk how to explain it. It's hard to show the issues with PGAD in a relationship without just rehashing my chronic pain ask. I might be a bit rusty because I'm playing off and on right now, so please forgive if anyone is OOC.

Also, I want to state that this is NOT a representation of everyone who has PGAD. I couldn't possibly fit all the symptoms, feelings, and causes in here without contradicting myself. There are many causes in the female sex though (Deposits built on the clitoris, slipped disc, hormonal imbalances, pregnancy, misfiring signals from the brain/nerve, ext). I have a fucked up nerve somewhere along the line. I'm a rare case of a rare disorder where I was born with it and haven't experienced a day without PGAD. These are only how I expect someone with my exact symptoms would react, and how the brothers would react to that. Also! If you have PGAD, and don't know ways to help out, I'll give you some tips. Just hmu baby 💞.

Warning! Sensitive Content!

Coming to the Devildom is just as you'd expect it to be, it's literal hell.

You're stressed, like, majorly so. You don't have your medications on you, you've been seperated from your phone, and these demons are telling you you'll have to stay in their realm for a year, doctor's visits be damned.

The emotional connection between your pain and your reactions is rising by the second. It's clear on your face, and most probably by the way you dig your nails into the palms of your hands, attempting to draw your attention away from the growing burning sensation.

You don't feel comfortable being set up in a strange house with seven strange demons. They're rowdy and rude and it just sets you on edge to the point that you're very near jumping everytime one of them speaks to you.

They don't speak to you often, thankfully. If you refuse to engage with them, they're fine with keeping their distance. Sometimes you'll hear something from Mammon, your appointed guide, and the blonde seems to enjoy commenting on what books you're reading, but that's about it.

But then you're expected to go to school, five days a week, whilst fulfilling a stupid task list everyday, and all that pressure really weighs on you before it's even begun.

You can't sit down for eight hours, let alone sit on a hard surface in such a toxic that is highschool without being put out of commission for a few days. This will really mess with their whole plan, and you doubt you'll get cut any slack if you don't actually let at least one of the council members in on your condition.

It shouldn't have to be that way. You shouldn't have to justify your state of wellbeing to people you've barely known for two days, but the only way out of here is by playing the game, so you target the eldest brother.

You explain to Lucifer your condition. It's very professional, straight-forward, and he doesn't ask many questions besides the obvious.

The two of you eventually come to a pretty decent arrangement. On the days when you're in too much pain to handle things, you can stay home, and do whatever you can to catch up. It's not exactly the best option, considering you have different teachers online and in person, but it works for the most part.

He does require you to do some studying with the third eldest though. Leviathan, you learn, is a shut-in. Most his schooling is online, and since you're situation tends to make you miss many days of school, Lucifer wants him to help you out.

The two of you don't exactly get along at first. Leviathan is the type to work alone, and he's not the best at explaining. So during the first two days, you kinda flounder from paper to paper, task to task. It's just more stress on your plate. You snap at him when he gets impatient with you, and he'll return the gesture with some mumbled insults.

Eventually the two of you get to a state where you can at least work together without arguing over something small, but he's still a little annoying to you.

Satan kinda steps up here too. He knows Levi isn't really the best at explaining things that aren't dipped in a convoluted storyline, so he tries to help out when he sees you in the library, often searching for information for your assignments.

And Satan is incredibly patient. Even without knowing of your condition, and that's kinda the support you need. Learning with PGAD is hard, because any sort of frustration just puts you in pain. He doesn't get offended if you snap, or if you're a bit stubborn because of this. Something about him recognizes that desperation in your eyes; the want to do things, but he just knows there's something holding you back. He's not sure what, and he doesn't ask out of respect for whatever you must be dealing with (Which is such a breath of fresh air).

Mammon, on the other hand, isn't as graceful in his approach. He doesn't really pick up on your vibes and that proves to be a bit unfortunate when you're having a hard time translating your feelings.

He takes most things you say a little too personal, despite also having a tendency to blurt out the first thing that comes to mind.

You two get on each other's nerves pretty equally. The stress that results makes being in his presence a bit difficult.

But no one makes your life worse then Asmodeus.

Sure, he's sweet. He probably picks up on the fact that you take baths as often as he does and gives you some fancy soaps/stuffs, but he's a little too touchy.

And a bit too sexual.

You try to distance yourself from him, and it has mixed results depending on how persistent Asmodeus is feeling that day.

The only one who you don't interact with much is Beel, and that's kind of a blessing in disguise. You're hardly a few days into your residency in the Devildom and you're already struggling to keep up with school and the brothers (as well as the voice coming from the attic...but you try to push that and Lucifer's threats to the back of your mind.)

Things only get worse when you make your pact with Mammon. In fact, the only good thing that really comes out of it is that you are able to help out Leviathan. Everything else feels like a shitstorm.

There was the expected teasing. The "Mammon was dumb enough to get played by a human" bit that really got old after the first time and a few offers to make some more pacts from lesser demons at school (which you always turned down). All the attention made your day stressful as fuck. You could hardly think without feeling strongly in some sort of way, and having a stabbing pain zeroing in on your pelvis.

And to your suprise, he can totally feel it.

(Personally I like to believe pacts go a bit deeper then the 'oh I can make you do things'. I feel it should be considered more, given how much power is given to them, and how often it's stated that the guys don't just give them out. If they were just about control, I have no doubt Mammon would have probably used it in a moment of desperation. In fact, it's kinda out of character that he hasn't at least made the mistake ONCE, so I headcanons there is a emotional/physical bond that comes with it.)

It's not completely there. He doesn't get all the pain and strife you do, but there's enough for him to kinda put the pieces together. He's not delicate in approaching you about it, however he thankfully does pull you aside after dinner, saving you the embarrassment of talking about genitals at the dinner table.

You explain to him what exactly PGAD is. That your body is feeling a sexual desire, but you mind isn't. So, instead of being pleasurable, it's painful.

He's not exactly sure what you're saying, but he becomes a lot more protective over you from now on.